On the Brighter Side ~ Marriage for Entrepreneurs

Money conversations don't have to lead to arguments—they can actually strengthen relationships when approached with the right communication tools and mindset. We explore three essential skills for talking about finances with your spouse that build connection instead of conflict.• Understanding each other's money personalities and formative experiences around finances• Learning to express your needs without blame or judgment• Scheduling regular, low-pressure "money huddles" to stay on the same page• Keeping financial discussions light and celebrating small wins together• Remembering you're on the same team when financial differences arise• Creating communication strategies that honor both partners' financial perspectives• Walking or driving side-by-side can make difficult money conversations easierI'm still offering my summer special for engaged and newlywed couples: three premarital or newly post-marital coaching sessions for the price of one. Email me at moni@monicatanner.com or set up a call at monicatanner.com/call. Also, watch for my upcoming book "Bad Marriage Advice" – get on the mailing list at www.badmarriageadvice.com for updates on when it will be available.Send us a text

I tackle the challenging reality of what to do when one partner wants to work on the relationship while the other resists, providing a clear three-step approach based on my experience with couples in this situation.• Despite what some experts claim, you cannot completely transform your marriage alone—both partners must participate• The first step is to directly invite your partner to therapy or coaching, being persistent but understanding about their concerns• Step two involves creating "productive discomfort" by withdrawing comforts you typically provide• The final step may require temporary separation to demonstrate how serious you are about improving the relationship• When both partners engage in the work, transformative results are possible that benefit not just the couple but future generations• Breaking generational patterns requires courage to stand up with loving power rather than settling for mediocrityIf you need help with this process, please reach out for a complimentary call at monicatanner.com/call. And for engaged or newlywed couples, I'm offering a special summer promotion—three RLT sessions for the price of one to help establish a strong foundation for your marriage.Send us a text

After an incredibly busy May filled with family celebrations including our 23rd wedding anniversary, my son's wedding, my daughter's high school graduation, and a week-long houseboat trip to Lake Powell, I'm reflecting on valuable relationship lessons that emerged during this special time.• Shared a powerful relationship skill called the "I notice" technique that creates open communication without triggering defensiveness• Explained how to properly use this approach by describing only what a security camera would see, not interpretations or judgments• Reflected on early marriage challenges and how different schedules and communication styles created difficulties• Advocated for premarital or newlywed counseling even when relationships seem perfect• Discussed the benefits of establishing a relationship with a therapist before problems arise• Offered insight into how Relational Life Therapy helps identify relationship patterns and triggering mechanisms• Emphasized the importance of learning repair techniques and effective communication skills earlyFor a limited time, I'm offering engaged and newlywed couples a special package of three coaching sessions for the price of one. This can be purchased as a gift for couples you know or for your own relationship. Visit monicatanner.com and click on "work with me" to schedule a consultation, or email moni@monicatanner.com for more information.Send us a text

Dr. Nicole Villegas, occupational therapist and founder of the Sensory Conscious Institute, explores how understanding nervous systems and sensory patterns helps build relationships rooted in safety, connection, and clarity.• Beyond the five senses: interoception (internal feelings), vestibular (movement through space), and proprioception (body position awareness)• Creating collaborative solutions versus compromises for different sensory preferences• Using the Three C's: curiosity, compassion and consent in communication• How unaddressed sensory needs lead to seemingly disproportionate reactions later• The AHA method for regulation: Acknowledge, Honor, and take Action toward safety• Signs your nervous system is dysregulated: racing heart, difficulty focusing, feeling "buzzy"• Walking and talking as an effective strategy for difficult conversations• Recognizing when your partner is overwhelmed through body language cues• Using "I noticed..." statements instead of judgment when discussing sensory responses• Learning to appreciate how sensory awareness creates opportunities for deeper connectionVisit drnicoleotd on Instagram or sensoryconcious.com to learn more about sensory practices and sign up for Dr. Nicole's newsletter "Refine" for small changes that make big differences.Send us a text

When life gets chaotic, maintaining your sanity and your marriage requires intentional practices and clear communication. This episode shares my five-step approach to handling busy seasons with grace while keeping my relationship strong and cooperative.• Start each day with focused prayer to identify what truly matters that day• Ask for help confidently, remembering that it allows others the opportunity to serve• Let your spouse know exactly how they can support you during busy times• Make specific requests rather than general complaints about lack of help• Keep "micro-disappointments" from becoming relationship-defining stories• Create detailed lists and delegate responsibilities to lighten your load• Practice saying "no" to protect your energy and relationships• Express appreciation for all help received and prioritize daily connection• Maintain relationship through daily check-ins, weekly date nights, and annual trips• Remember that teamwork in chaos comes from intentional communicationKeep prioritizing each other in the chaos, and I'll see you next week, same time, same place. And until then, happy marriaging.Send us a text

Tony and Elisa DiLorenzo of One Extraordinary Marriage discuss how busy couples can rekindle intimacy and connection through intentional time together. They reveal the biggest roadblocks to intimacy are lack of meaningful conversation and diminished sexual connection, with practical solutions for couples who feel like roommates.• The "we'll make time when..." trap leads many couples to disconnect by the time life finally slows down• Couples who delay nurturing their relationship often reach empty nester stage feeling like strangers• A time audit usually reveals at least 30 minutes daily that could be redirected to relationship building• Start with just 15 minutes of connection through card games, comedy clips, or simple physical touch• Difficult conversations may require a third-party facilitator to create safe space for both partners• Internal forgiveness work is essential for moving past resentment without necessarily verbalizing it• Children have free will—their choices aren't always a reflection of parenting approaches• It's never too late to transform your relationship, as demonstrated by couples married 30+ years• More relationship resources exist now than ever before, making help accessible to all couplesVisit IntimacyMastery.com to take an assessment of your relationship and get a roadmap for improving connection over 30, 60, and 90 days.Send us a text

We celebrate a double milestone as my son gets married on our 23rd wedding anniversary. This emotional weekend brings together two generations of love stories while I reflect on what makes a marriage work for over two decades.• Cooking for 125 wedding guests from a small Airbnb with crockpots scattered throughout every room• The importance of morning walks for communication and connection in marriage• Jewish wedding traditions including the chuppah and breaking glass to symbolize the couple's new journey• The significance of being intentional about building a good relationship with my new daughter-in-law• How apologizing quickly and choosing each other daily strengthens marriage over decades• The value of community support and having a "village" to celebrate important life transitionsGet on the waiting list for my upcoming book "Bad Marriage Advice" at www.badmarriageadvice.com and receive a free gift of 300+ date night ideas for every season, budget, and interest.Send us a text

I spent an incredible weekend at the first-ever Relational Life Therapy conference in Orlando, immersed in transformative teachings from world-renowned relationship experts. RLT offers powerful tools for building radically honest, fiercely loving relationships where both partners thrive in equality, focusing on intimacy, connection, and practical relational skills.• RLT focuses on telling the truth in relationships and why honesty creates deeper connection• Diversity and inclusion play crucial roles in understanding how upbringing affects relationship dynamics• Learning practical techniques for vulnerability, speaking truth to power, and working through difficult moments together• Multi-generational trauma can be healed when one person "faces the flame" and changes family patterns• Happy couples aren't conflict-free but excel at repair after disconnection• Small repair attempts like reaching for your partner's hand or saying "we're on the same team" can transform relationships• Relationships aren't meant to be perfect but real—the growth happens in the repairShare this episode with a friend and DM me on Instagram @monitanner1 to let me know one thing you're going to do this week to make your relationship stronger.Send us a text

Money often causes tension in relationships, but it doesn't have to. Nate and Bethany Smith share their expertise on creating financial harmony through better communication, understanding each other's money stories, and developing shared goals.• Understanding your partner's "money story" helps build empathy and reduces financial conflict• Creating a "spending and savings plan" feels more empowering than a restrictive budget• Pay yourself first by prioritizing savings before other expenses• Rule of 72 shows how your money doubles (divide 72 by your interest rate)• Teaching kids early money habits and the time value of money sets them up for success• Changing your environment (walks, weekend getaways) creates better financial conversations• Awareness of where money goes and having a plan prevents financial stress• Having a vision for your future makes daily money decisions easier• Understanding the psychology behind money decisions is as important as the mathContact Nate and Bethany at @yourcashflowcouple on Instagram or visit howmoneyworks.com/NateSmith or howmoneyworks.com/BethanySmith to book a free consultation.Send us a text

In this episode, we explore how recommitting to daily conversations and weekly date nights can reignite emotional intimacy and transform your relationship with your partner.• Gottman research shows mapping your partner's inner world is crucial for emotional connection• People constantly change and evolve—nobody remains the same person they were when you married• Commit to 20 minutes of daily connection through walking and meaningful conversation• Move beyond transactional topics (kids, chores, schedules) to discover what excites or stresses your partner• Ask questions like "What are you learning right now?" or "Who are you enjoying talking to lately?"• Use weekly date nights to explore the origins of beliefs about sex, money, relationships• Investigate childhood experiences to understand where your partner's core beliefs originated• "Weed out" unhealthy beliefs and intentionally plant new ideas in your relationship garden• Emotional connection naturally enhances all other forms of intimacy• Utilize resources like card decks, apps, and games for inspiration if you're struggling with conversation startersI invite you to go for a walk with your spouse every single day, start mapping their inner world with really good questions, and make sure you're getting date night on the calendar every week. I promise it will make a huge difference in the connection, closeness and emotional intimacy you feel with your partner.Send us a text

Send us a textPassionate relationships require more than love—they need the right psychological dynamics to keep desire alive. When couples come to me feeling more like roommates than lovers, they're often surprised to learn that their sexual disconnection has less to do with libido or attraction and more to do with unrecognized emotional patterns.The truth about passionate marriages might surprise you. While emotional connection matters, your sexual relationship operates with separate dynamics that need specific attention. Differentiation—maintaining your sense of self while being emotionally connected—creates the foundation for desire. As relationship expert David Schnarch explains, people who struggle with differentiation often resort to control tactics or emotional distance rather than healthy interdependence.Your sexual connection is also deeply influenced by context, as Emily Nagoski brilliantly explains. Desire isn't simply spontaneous—it's responsive to your environment and circumstances. This means transitioning from daily responsibilities to intimate connection requires intentional shifts in mindset, not just spontaneous attraction. Meanwhile, Esther Perel reminds us that "fire needs air"—eroticism thrives in the space between partners, requiring some degree of mystery and novelty to remain vibrant.The good news? These dynamics can transform with intentional effort. Start by reconnecting with what makes you feel alive and embodied, practice differentiation by expressing needs without controlling your partner, and prioritize whatever helps you transition into a sensual mindset. Build erotic tension through flirtation and novel experiences, and commit to regular conversations about your sexual connection.Sexual disconnection isn't a life sentence—it's an invitation to grow together. Remember that having differing levels of desire is normal in every aspect of marriage. With understanding and the right tools, you can rediscover the passion that may have temporarily dimmed and create a sexual relationship that's fulfilling for both partners.Have questions about your own relationship dynamics? Reach out to me directly—I'm passionate about helping couples move beyond roommate syndrome to rediscover true intimacy and desire.

Send us a textWhat's the worst piece of marriage advice you've ever received? In my years coaching couples, I've heard countless well-meaning but misguided tips passed down between generations. Today, I'm pulling back the curtain on one of the most damaging myths that keeps showing up, especially in religious communities: "divorce is not an option."Despite its popularity among relationship experts, this seemingly innocent advice creates devastating ripple effects in marriages. It breeds complacency—why try when your partner is stuck with you anyway? It kills honest communication—why bring up difficult topics when nothing can change? Most ironically, it replaces genuine security with fear, leaving partners wondering if they're chosen or merely tolerated. Instead of creating stability, this mindset often nurtures resentment and emotional distance.This episode offers a glimpse into my forthcoming book, "Bad Marriage Advice: 15 Myths That Will Make You Miserable," where I counter these harmful ideas with relationship wisdom grounded in choice, growth, and authentic connection. When my son announced his engagement, I realized I wanted to give him a marriage resource that wouldn't set him up for failure, and this book was born. The strongest marriages aren't built on obligation or fear of divorce—they thrive when both partners know they're actively chosen every day despite having other options.Have you received terrible marriage advice? I'd love to hear your stories! Send written accounts, audio recordings, or videos to moni@monicatanner.com to be featured on the podcast and social media. Your experiences can help others recognize and reject the myths that make marriages miserable.

Send us a textI'm announcing my first book "Bad Marriage Advice: 15 Myths that Are Making you Miserable," releasing on May 3rd to coincide with my 23rd wedding anniversary and my son's wedding day. The book challenges popular but potentially harmful marriage advice and offers better relational skills based on my experience as a marriage coach and interviews with couples married over 50 years.• Written as a guide for my son's upcoming marriage, combining maternal wisdom with professional expertise• Addresses common myths like "don't go to bed angry," "happy wife, happy life," and "don't sweat the small stuff"• Explains why compromise is overrated and collaboration is the better approach• Demonstrates how popular marriage advice often dampens communication between couples• Contains practical communication skills applicable for newly married and long-term couples• Designed to be relatable, entertaining, and immediately usefulIf you have an audience who could benefit from better marriage advice, please reach out to me about featuring the book. Stay tuned for upcoming episodes that will dive deeper into specific chapters and concepts from each chapter.

Send us a textMonica Tanner shares transformative relationship skills to help couples communicate more effectively and maintain passion in their marriages. Through practical frameworks, she reveals how making specific requests and mastering repair techniques can dramatically improve relationship satisfaction.• Most people complain about relationship problems rather than making clear requests• Every complaint contains a hidden request that can be uncovered• Effective requests follow three steps: rocking the boat, being specific, and showing appreciation• Requests should be specific, behavioral, and time-bound• Asking "Is there anything I can do to help you come through for me?" increases success rate• Sexual requests can follow the same framework while respecting boundaries and choice• Repair is a one-way street—only one person's concerns should be addressed at a time• The repair process should be limited to eight sentences maximum• Always begin repair by "remembering love" and your purpose for the conversation• Describe what happened objectively, share your interpretation, express feelings, and make a requestIf you're looking to improve your marriage, reach out to Monica at moni@monicatanner.com to set up a time to chat. Learn more about Monica's coaching and podcast at monicatanner.com or find her on Instagram.

Send us a textWalking with your partner is a powerful tool that has strengthened my marriage through every season, from dating challenges to parenting transitions and career changes.• Discovered the power of walking while facing parental disapproval during our engagement• Walking side-by-side creates a safe space for difficult conversations that face-to-face interaction doesn't• Daily walks help us download the day, discuss challenges, and reconnect• Beach walks and neighborhood loops have become our favorite ways to connect• Walking protected our marriage during major life transitions including empty nesting and career changes• Side-by-side movement (even driving) creates the same effect when walking isn't possible• After 23 years of marriage, we're still learning new things about each other during our walksIf you have questions about anything, please do not hesitate to send me an email, moni@monicatanner.com. I can't wait to hear how your walks are going!

Send us a textThis episode sheds light on the often challenging journey of forgiveness in relationships. Understanding how to forgive is crucial for moving forward after betrayal or hurt. • Exploring the emotional journey of betrayal in relationships • Importance of understanding personal willingness in forgiveness • Discussing the withholding dynamic in relationships • Actionable steps to effectively communicate needs for healing • Viewing forgiveness as an act of personal freedom • Encouragement to seek professional help if necessary If you're struggling with issues of trust and forgiveness in your relationship, please reach out for support. You can book a complimentary relationship breakthrough call here:  https://tidycal.com/onthebrightersideoflife/call

Send us a textTrust is an essential foundation of relationships, but sometimes it gets broken. This week, Nate and I dive into the complexities of restoring damaged trust, providing valuable insights and actionable strategies. • Definition of trust and its importance in relationships • Exploring types of hurts: big and small • Discussing personal responsibility in rebuilding trust • Effective communication strategies for addressing trust issues • The vital role of consistency and ongoing actions in trust repair • Emphasizing that healing is not a one-time conversation, but an ongoing process Remember to take responsibility for your actions and truly understand your partner's feelings to foster resilience in your relationship.If you need help with this process, please reach out for a complimentary consultation here:  https://tidycal.com/onthebrightersideoflife/call

Send us a textThis episode addresses how to navigate feelings of disappointment in a relationship, particularly following Valentine's Day. We explore effective communication strategies, the importance of honesty, and techniques to foster understanding and empathy during tough conversations. • Discussing the common aftermath of unmet expectations • Importance of maintaining open and honest communication • Techniques to express feelings without emotional dumping • Establishing ground rules for productive conversations • The WAIT method: understanding the purpose of dialogue • Acknowledging and responding to each other's emotions with empathy • Strategies for creating a safe space for honest discussions • Importance of preemptively addressing feelings to prevent resentment • The value of mutual understanding in resolving conflicts • Building intimacy through vulnerability and active listeningFor help in having these discussions, please book a 30 minute complimentary call using this link: https://tidycal.com/onthebrightersideoflife/call

Send us a textCan understanding love languages actually harm your relationship? Nate shares a remarkable personal experiment with his wife that uncovers some surprising insights into how we express and perceive love. While the idea of identifying your partner's love language is popular, we discuss the potential pitfalls of using it as a benchmark or a tool for assigning blame. When expectations aren't met, relationships can suffer from resentment and even infidelity. The 5 Love Language framework, while initially helpful, should not become a rigid scorecard for evaluating success. We caution against forming covert contracts based on these principles, which can lead to unfulfilled expectations and relationship breakdowns. Instead, we encourage embracing love languages as a starting block for personal growth and genuine connection. Our discussion challenges the popular notion of the Five Love Languages, exploring how they can inadvertently harm relationships instead of fostering genuine connection. We talk about the dangers of covert contracts and high expectations, urging listeners to adopt a more empathetic understanding of their partner's needs.• Examining the widespread influence of the Five Love Languages  • Personal experiences illustrating the concept's potential pitfalls  • The emergence of covert contracts in relationships  • The detrimental effects of scorekeeping in love language expressions   • Advocating empathy and deeper understanding through relational complexity  • Encouraging listeners to thoughtfully use love languages for growth  • Promoting love as a dynamic exchange rather than fixed expectations

Send us a textThis episode explores the concept of emotional entropy in relationships, emphasizing that love requires consistent effort and attention to thrive. Through relatable analogies and expert insights, we are encouraging you to actively nurture your marriage to prevent stagnation and promote growth.• Overview of emotional entropy and its relevance to relationships • Common misconceptions about marriage leading to complacency • Importance of Dr. John Gottman's insights on emotional health • Strategies for turning towards each other's bids for attention • The value of recognizing daily contributions within the partnership • Practical tips for investing in a thriving relationship • Encouragement to prioritize kindness and active engagement with partners • Call to action for listeners to implement changes in their relationships

Send us a textThe episode explores effective strategies for couples to enhance their emotional connections through acknowledgment, making specific requests, and celebrating small progress in relationships. By emphasizing the importance of turning complaints into requests, recognizing positive behavior, and ignoring unhelpful dynamics, listeners are encouraged to build a healthier, more supportive partnership.• Discussing the importance of vulnerability in relationships • Recapping previous episodes for context • Turning complaints into specific requests • Recognizing and celebrating small victories • Understanding the dynamics of behavioral reinforcement • Drawing parallels from animal training to relationship building • Emphasizing the need for appreciation over complaint • Advising on techniques to redirect unwanted behaviors Thank you for joining us! We would love to hear how you integrate recognizing progress in your relationship. Please remember to share your experiences and thoughts!The book we refer to in this episode is called: What Shamu Taught Me About Life, Love and Marriage by Amy Sutherland

Send us a textExplore the transformative power of Relational Life Therapy (RLT) and how it can help couples break free from unhealthy patterns to foster deeper connections. Risa Ganel discusses how the adaptive child, systemic changes, and a focus on second-order change can reshape relationships for lasting benefit. • RLT emphasizes systemic connections in relationships • Differentiates between first-order and second-order change • Focus on nurturing the ‘adaptive child' for emotional growth • Importance of personal accountability and choice in relationships • The role of communication in nourishing intimacy • Opportunities for couples' growth through bootcamps and workshopsCheck out Risa's Bootcamps here: https://www.togethercouplescounseling.comFind an RLT Therapist or Coach here: https://directory.relationallife.com/Book a FREE Relationship Breakthrough call with me here: https://tidycal.com/onthebrightersideoflife/call

Send us a textCommunication is key to a thriving relationship, and asking for what you want instead of complaining is a game-changer. This episode offers practical tools to help you identify your unexpressed needs and transition from a blame-focused mindset to positive, actionable requests. • Emphasizing the importance of vulnerability in relationships • Identifying the root of complaints and transforming them into requests • Maintaining love and empathy while making requests • Discussing personal responsibility in fulfilling partner needs • Recognizing and managing micro disappointments • Encouraging feedback from listeners about their experiences with requests

Send us a textThis episode focuses on understanding the importance of taking risks to rejuvenate a relationship and combat mediocrity. Monica and Nate discuss fears that hold couples back, with insights into how to engage in open conversations that lead to positive change and passion in marriage. • Emphasizing the need to awaken passion in relationships • Discussing the three common fears preventing honest conversations • Highlighting the cost of complacency in love • Encouraging vulnerability and openness with partners • Offering actionable advice for difficult discussions • Sharing personal narratives to illustrate key insights • Reminding listeners about the powerful impact on children and future generations • Introducing next week's topic on asking for what you truly want in relationships

Send us a textUnlock the secrets to transforming a mediocre marriage into one filled with passion and fulfillment. Discover how to navigate the ebb and flow between survival and self-actualization, and learn why investing time and effort into your partnership can reignite the flames of passion.In this episode, we'll give you the 3 rules of turning a mediocre marriage into one full of passion, play and pleasure. You do not want to miss the fantastic broad overview of the skills we will be teaching in the new year. Get a jump start on writing your happily ever after love story.Interested in setting goals and a unified vision for 2025. Join me on January 7th at noon MST as I walk you through this process in a workshop style class. Even if you can't join us live, you'll get a replay and a workbook, so you can work through it at your own pace. Use this link to register --> https://www.eventbrite.com/e/plan-for-relationship-success-in-2025-tickets-1115977291119?aff=oddtdtcreator

Send us a textAfter returning from a rejuvenating, phone-free escape to Cancun with my husband, I'm back with insights on how to create a year-end wrap-up experience. Joined by my faithful co-host, Nate Bagley, we share how undivided attention can transform your partnership, even if a luxury getaway isn't in the cards this year. Discover creative ways to carve out meaningful moments at home or on a simple staycation, ensuring that no barrier, whether financial or logistical, stands in the way of bonding with your partner. Plus, learn more about an exciting class coming up on January 7th that promises to help couples reflect on the past year and strategize for the future.In this episode, we discuss ways to set relationship goals, tackle conflicts, and prepare for an end-of-year meeting that sets the stage for a thriving new year together.Goal setting in relationships can be a double-edged sword, offering both opportunities for growth and potential pitfalls. In our conversation, we unpack the nuances of sharing goals and holding each other accountable, emphasizing the importance of clear communication and boundaries. Whether you're using apps, coaches, or each other for support, knowing how to strike the right balance is key. As the year wraps up, we encourage you to conduct a year-end review with your partner to ensure a harmonious start to 2025. We will take a brief break for the holidays, returning on New Year's Eve to explore the differences between a mediocre marriage and a passionate one.In our conversation, Nate refered to several books on marriage that he has read. Here are links to them on Amazon if you want to check them out.Want to attend my webclass all about Setting Goals as a Couple and Making 2025 your BEST Year Yet? Use this link to register:  https://www.eventbrite.com/e/plan-for-relationship-success-in-2025-tickets-1115977291119?aff=oddtdtcreatorThe All Or Nothing Marriage by: Eli FinkleEverything Isn't Terrible by: Kathleen SmithWhat Shamu Taught Me About Life, Love and Marriage by: Amy Sutherland

Send us a textWant to navigate this holiday season with ease and connection rather than stress and conflict? Join Nate Bagley and I as we discuss the complicated dynamics of holiday traditions, family gatherings, and the financial strain that often accompanies this joyous time. We offer insights into recognizing stress indicators in ourselves and our relationships—like emotional reactivity and perfectionism—and provide you with practical strategies to shift from a season of obligation to one filled with genuine joy and happiness.We talk about the importance of communication and planning to ease holiday tensions. Especially the importance of setting clear expectations for events, aligning on gift-giving preferences, and updating traditions to reflect shared family values. Nate and I swap personal stories and strategies on budgeting and creating thoughtful gift lists, emphasizing how these approaches can help maintain harmony. By focusing on what truly matters, we want to help you in transform holiday chaos into a time of meaningful connection with loved ones.Finally, we bring in the transformative power of gratitude. Discover how a shift in perspective can turn holiday stress into moments of magic. We share heartfelt stories about our own experiences of staying positive amid daily challenges, illustrating how gratitude can be a powerful, cost-free tool to uplift your spirits. Make sure you tune in and try these 3 tips for improving your connection with your Sweetheart this holiday season and let us know which ones worked best for you!

Send us a textAre you ready for a BIG Announcement and fun surprise?Introducing my new co-host, Nate Bagley. Listen in as we reminisce about our first meeting at a Tennessee marketing conference and how his work with marriage legands like John and Julie Gottman first piqued my interest. Nate shares his experiences as his life took an unexpected turn during the pandemic. Nate and his wife made the bold decision to relocate to Costa Rica for a period of time and learned so much there. Hear Nate's heartfelt reflections on prioritizing his marriage amidst the chaos of a world-wide pandemic and his growing family.Parenting is a world unto itself, filled with both tender moments and unimaginable pressures. Hear the secret behind Nate's pink fingernails to the warmth of family traditions that make parenting rewarding. I share my woes about kids growing up and leaving home and we conclude that we must cherish every precious moment and show up for our marriage and family first and foremost.We are excited to share more great content with you as this season of the Secrets of Happily Ever After Podast unfolds!!!

Send us a textFeeling like roommates or wrestling with resentment in your marriage? Discover how to rekindle an insanely fun and intimate partnership with actionable strategies in every episode.  After a six-month break filled with family milestones and personal growth, I'm back with a fresh perspective and a streamlined approach. This season promises simplicity and focus, ensuring you'll get top-notch marriage tips and intimacy resources straight into your busy life.  I'm bringing my BEST content here and into my upcoming book, offering you valuable insights without the hassle of a group settings.In a few short months, I'll be a certified RLT coach, and I'll share how this method tackles the resistance to using relationship tools, creating thriving partnerships. I'm also thrilled to collaborate with a marriage researcher to discuss exciting, research-backed ideas in each episode. Tune into special bonus episodes all week to meet my special friend and co-host. Can't wait to dive into this exciting content with you!!If you are interested in couple's coaching, please email me at:  moni@monicatanner.com.

Feeling the pressure of life's relentless to-do list and summer bucket list? In the finale episode of my third season, I'm revealing exactly how to ensure all of your relationships flourish, even when life throws chaos and overwhelm at you.  I'll teach you with my number one HACK to keep your calm and carry on, regardless of the hustle and bustle that may come your way. Get ready to fortify your bonds and strengthen all of your relationship with these simple and practical thoughts and gestures. Download the FREE resource, "75 Ways to Show Gratitude to Your Loved Ones" HERE --> https://monicatanner.com/gratitudeI'm taking a short break for the summer to love on my family, but I'll be back soon with brand new and improved episodes and interviews you won't want to miss. So, here's to a summer of love, laughter, and gratitude, and I can't wait to engage with you when I return for an exciting fourth season starting in August.

Ever wonder how some couples seem to navigate the ebbs and flows of marriage with grace and a smile? This week, I'm chatting with Brian and Jen Goins from Family Life, who join us to share their 27 years of wisdom on building a relationship that thrives.  We discuss the everyday skills essential for cultivating both individuality and unity in marriage. This episode isn't just about the dos and don'ts—it's an exploration of the delicate art of compromise, the celebration of our partner's uniqueness, and the passion that can be ignited through embracing our differences.Laughter and code words might sound like the ingredients for a spy novel, but in this episode, they're the secret spices for a strong marriage. We're not only talking about the romantic side of things but also about how to handle tough conversations with grace and love.  And for those moments when challenges arise, we discuss the transformative power of seeking guidance and the strength found in having a community to support your marital journey.Brian and Jen provide real-life examples of how to keep the spark alive.  If you're looking to strengthen the foundation of your marriage with compassion, laughter, and a good dose of reality, this episode will equip you with the tools to not just weather the storms but also to dance in the rain. Join us for this enriching episode that's as much about friendship and fun as it is about love and loyalty.

Wondering what it takes to keep passion burning HOT  in the hustle of daily life? Alex and Katie Dutton join me this week to share the sparks of truth behind their EveryLove adventure—a service that's rekindling the fire in marriages through creative date night packages and model-free lingerie. They tell their story of entrepreneurship entwined with the commitment to nurturing a deep, intimate bond amidst the beautiful chaos of raising children and juggling careers.We go over the critical steps to prioritize intimacy, stressing the importance of defining its meaning for each individual.  We also cover aligning expectations and fostering open communication as well as how to schedule intimate moments without losing spontaneity, but ensuring that the love between you and your partner gets the attention it deserves.As we wrap up, the focus shifts to the power of community in supporting a happy marriage.  We leave you with an invitation to not just listen but to actively engage with us, as we champion the notion that 'Happily Ever After' isn't just a fairytale ending—it's a reality crafted with intentionality, love, and a little help from friends.Check out EveryLove HERE -> https://www.everyloveintimates.com/monicatanner and use the code: MONICATANNER to get 25% off your first 2 collections!

Have you ever felt like your conversations with loved ones are getting a little dry?This week's interview with Emmy Award-winner, Topaz Adizes shatters that pattern, unveiling "12 Questions for Love" to revolutionize our understanding of intimate dialogues. Topaz is known for his work on The { } And project and shares how carefully crafted questions can peel back the layers we often unintentionally wrap around those closest to us, liberating our relationships from the confines of the metaphorical boxes we've built.My discussion with Topaz sheds light on the magic of road trip-like environments that encourage raw, uninterrupted conversation, showing us how to replicate this space in our daily lives. Through anecdotes and insights, we unlock the secret to nurturing conversations that evolve as our relationships deepen, emphasizing the role of intentionality and the settings we create for fostering openness and vulnerability.This episode serves as a gentle reminder to approach our loved ones with empowering questions that inspire growth and understanding. For more resources on love and connection, be sure to check out:  https://monicatanner.com.

Ready to become the author of your own love story?In this week's episode, I tackle the dreaded 'intimacy death traps,' dissecting the root causes that lead to disconnection and providing a comprehensive 5-step framework to navigate your way back to a fulfilling partnership. This isn't your run-of-the-mill relationship advice; it's a deep dive into taking responsibility, fostering judgment-free communication, and why initiating change can be your romantic game-changer. I'll be guiding you through the intricacies of assuming responsibility for the passion that's slipped through the cracks and how a simple shift towards curiosity and acceptance can transform your relationship dynamics. Discover the 'cheat code' to involving a third party in rebuilding intimacy, and learn why expressing love without restraint could be your ticket out of complacency. This episode isn't just about falling back into love—it's about creating a love that's going to grow, no matter how many anniversaries you've celebrated. Join me on this intimate journey towards happily ever after.Download my FREE resourse with 51 questions to ask you spouse to get to know them better HERE --> https://monicatanner.com/51questions

As a seasoned relationship coach and intimacy expert, I've seen firsthand how easily couples can fall into intimacy death traps, letting the initial spark of their relationship dim. But fear not! I'm here to arm you with the knowledge to identify these traps and the strategies to avoid them. This week's episode is for anyone hoping to breathe new life into their intimate relationship. I invite you to reflect and engage with me by sharing your experiences and challenges. Your stories and feedback are the heart of our community, and together, we'll overcome the traps that keep couples trapped for decades. So, if you're ready to transform your marriage from mediocre to extraordinary, tune in and let's start crafting your love story with the skill and intention it deserves. For ongoing support in how to sidestep these intimacy death traps, be sure to check out the Passionate Marriage Club here --> https://monicatanner.com/club

Have you ever wondered what it's like to trade in the hustle and bustle of city life for the compact serenity of an Airstream? Join me as I sit down with Caley Rose and Karl Walker, a Billboard charting singer-songwriter and a user experience designer, who did just that. Embarking on a life less ordinary, they've navigated the highs and lows of transforming a trailer into a home, all while keeping their relationship thriving. Their story isn't just about shared space; it's about shared dreams, from music to design, and the delicate dance of supporting each other's creative ambitions without losing sight of family values.Caley and Karl open up about the intricacies of a partnership where career paths diverge—Kaylee's melodies filling venues and Carl's tech expertise shaping user interactions. How do they do it? By crafting their unique blend of support, understanding, and adaptability, they reveal the secret sauce to pursuing individual passions while maintaining a fulfilling relationship.As we wrap up, they share exciting news about the future as they prepare to add another member to their family and entertain the idea of installing solar panels. Their journey of growth and empowerment is a testament to the importance of finding a partner who champions your aspirations. Caley and Karl's love story is one for the modern age, proving that with the right person by your side, the adventure never truly ends—it just evolves.

Today I'm serving up an episode that reveals how the team spirit of volleyball can spike the joy in your marriage. Imagine applying the same strategies that lead a volleyball team to victory to your own partnership; think encouragement, well-defined roles, and celebrating every win together. I'll share with you the secrets of a successful team—secrets that can transform your marriage into a partnership where gratitude is the net, acknowledgment is the ball, and positivity is the winning play.Full of puns and analogies from spending a weekend in a giant convention center in Las Vegas surrounded by hundreds of volleyball games going simultaneously, I had some strong thoughts of how elite teams work together towards victory and how this applies to marriage.I'm also thrilled to introduce the Passionate Marriage Club, an exclusive membership designed to help couples like you strengthen their bond and actively work towards their very own happily ever after. Become part of a community that believes in learning new relational skills and practicing them until it becomes second nature. Learn more about the Passionate Marriage Club here --> https://monicatanner.com/club

Could your marriage become stronger if you considered divorce as a viable option? Today, I'm chatting with relationship coach Sharon Pope, as we uncover the paradoxical notion that acknowledging the possibility of divorce can actually reinforce a marriage. We delve into the power of choice and how it can lead to a more intentional and fulfilling partnership. Throughout our conversation, we emphasize the importance of setting healthy boundaries and reveal why trying to control our partner's commitment often backfires, leaving a trail of unhappiness and discontent.As societal roles evolve, so do the dynamics within a marriage. Sharon and I discuss the new terrain of gender expectations and responsibilities, dissecting how modern marriages are adapting—or struggling—to keep pace. We cast light on the silent signals that a relationship may be veering off course and stress the urgency of addressing issues promptly. Whether it's cultivating a space for open dialogue or recognizing when it's time to seek professional help, we guide you through the critical choices that can either rejuvenate your relationship or lead you to part ways with grace and certainty.This episode addresses the complexities of maintaining intimacy amidst the demands of parenthood. We share strategies for nurturing your connection and why it's essential to remain curious about your evolving spouse. In addition, we explore how relationship coaching can provide the toolkit needed for couples to flourish through adversity. So, whether you're looking to reignite the spark in your marriage or contemplating the crossroads of "stay or go," this episode offers valuable insights and practical advice for embracing the continuous journey of love and partnership.

How many times have you said something like, we'll work on our marriage when... the kids get a little older, our business is more successful or we have more money/time? I'm here to share why this approach may cost you more than you think. This heartfelt episode peels back the layers on the myth that there's a "right time" to focus on your spouse and kids, revealing how this mindset can lead to emotional disconnection and even conflict. I'm offering practical strategies to ensure your marriage thrives no matter what stage of child-rearing, business or financial stability you are in.  Discover how to intertwine a relationship-first philosophy into your busy schedule, avoiding the pitfalls that many ambitious parents or entrepreneurs fall into.It's all about action – realigning your daily priorities to put your marriage and family front and center.  We'll talk about gratitude practices, the magic of date nights, and the irreplaceable value of quality time with your family. And for those who find striking this balance challenging, I open up about how professional help, like the services I provide, can revolutionize your relationships. Tune in for a powerful reminder that your greatest achievements should never come at the cost of the relationships that mean the most.

Unlock the secret ingredients to a lasting and loving relationship with Dr. Sara Nassarzadeh's profound insights. In this episode, we explore the six foundational elements that she believes are crucial for a flourishing partnership. From the allure of mutual attraction to the depth of shared vision, our conversation navigates the intricate dance of love, compassion, and daily loving behaviors. Dr. Sara's groundbreaking perspectives, as presented in her book "Love by Design," challenge the conventional molds, emphasizing how individuality and unity can coexist in a harmonious balance.At the heart of our discussion lies the transformative power of compassion and the art of empathy in navigating the sometimes tumultuous journey of togetherness. We address the challenges and triumphs of being present for our partners in times of misunderstanding, drawing upon personal experiences and the wisdom of relationship experts like Gottman. By tuning in, you'll grasp how the small, consistent acts of kindness can weave a tapestry of enduring love, turning 'happily ever after' from a myth into an achievable reality. Join us in this heartfelt exploration, and let's design love that lasts a lifetime.Join us for the FREE 3-Day Live Seduce Your Spouse Challenge starting on March 5th. Register at --> https://monicatanner.com/syslive

Do you ever feel like you're juggling too many hats, trying to be the perfect businessperson, parent, and romantic partner all at once? In this episode, I'm unpacking the art of transitioning between the demands of work, the responsibilities of parenting, and the pleasures of romance with your partner. We explore the nuances of adapting to each role without losing your sense of self or the spark in your relationship.I'm going to give you insight into a  woman's mind, filled with endless 'mental tabs' that can sometimes hinder intimacy. I'll share my top strategies for closing those tabs, setting boundaries, and creating sacred spaces that signal it's time to shift into lover mode. Plus, you won't want to miss the details on my upcoming "Seduce Your Spouse Challenge," a three-day challenge designed to fan the flames of passion in your marriage.  Register here --> https://monicatanner.com/sysliveWhether you're looking to enhance your connection or simply find more balance, this episode offers the practical advice and supportive insights you need to keep love thriving amid life's constant juggle.

Ever found yourself let down after a holiday or special occasion? You're not alone. In this epsiode, I'm chatting with my friends Greg and Rachel Denning of Extraordinary Family Life. Together, we confront the perils of high expectations that holidays like Valentine's Day and anniversaries can bring. We talk about how communication acts as the cornerstone of a thriving relationship. We share personal stories to illustrate the power of planning and mutual effort in nurturing the bond between partners. It's about creating joy together and, perhaps more importantly, managing it so the mental load doesn't diminish the happiness you deserve.Lastly, we delve into the concept of 'relationship bank accounts,' emphasizing the significance of individual wholeness in marriage.  I share insights from my coaching experiences that can transform not just your relationship but also model a healthy, thriving partnership for your children. Check out this interview that promises to inject new vitality into your marital connection, leaving you equipped to create a more extraordinary family life.

Ready to reshape your view on Valentine's Day and turn it into a day you both actually enjoy? Let's stop dropping hints and creating resentment from unmet expectations with some honest, heart-to-heart communication. This episode is all about replacing those last-minute scrambles with meaningful traditions and understanding. I'll walk you through the exact steps to engage in those crucial conversations with your sweetheart—setting the stage for clarity and connection, not just on February 14th but for every celebration your calendar holds.This week is about recognizing each other's efforts, celebrating progress, and infusing every occasion with genuine gratitude. And, for those looking for that perfect Valentine's gesture, why not make a pledge to regular, weekly date nights and documenting your love story with the Date Night Journal. Get yours before Valentine's Day by ordering before February 10th using this link --> https://monicatanner.com/journal

Have you ever wondered about the secret ingredients that make a partner irresistible?In this week's episode, I'm interviewing Kimberly Holmes, CEO of Marriage Helper International, who shares not only her professional expertise but also her personal story.  You'll hear how Kimberly's family history of divorce and reconciliation sets the stage for the transformative work she's passionate about and what she's doing next.Kimberly gives us the four crucial areas of attraction through her PIES framework and she breaks them all down.P - Physical AttractionI - Intellectual AttractionE - Emotional AttractionS - Spiritual AttractionMake sure you join us for this episode and take the Intimacy Quiz at the end if you haven't already --> https://monicatanner.com/quiz

Ever found yourself caught in a tangle of misunderstandings with your partner, where every comment feels like a dig? I'm pulling back the curtain on the silent saboteur known as negative sentiment override. Learn how this mental habit can erode the very foundations of our relationships and some strategies to overcome it. We'll talk about the art of positive sentiment override, where the benefit of the doubt becomes a bridge to better communication and conflict resolution, using Dr. John Gottman's golden positivity ratio.Be sure to tune in transformative anecdotes and strategies, all designed to keep the flame of romance alive, turning everyday interactions with your Sweetheart into an ongoing honeymoon. As my gift to you for listening, download a copy of my 75 ways to show gratitude for your spouse at: www.monicatanner.com/gratitude

In this episode, I'm thrilled to introduce life coach, Julie Balkman, as we chat about the secrets of long-lasting love and romance.Join us as we discuss cultivating a love that endures through the years. We cover the importance of choosing a partner who values introspection and personal growth and moving beyond the superficiality of the dating scene to foster authentic, meaningful connections. This conversation isn't just about finding love; it's about nurturing it from the early stages of a relationship all the way to the golden years of marriage.We also explore the concept of a 'love tank' and how self-sufficiency plays a crucial role in relationship fulfillment. We talk about drawing happiness from various sources, like nature's beauty or a spiritual connection, especially during challenging times such as navigating a divorce. This episode is a guide to becoming a source of love, enriching not only your life but also that of your partner.But there's more! We share innovative ideas to inject new life into your marriage. From reading together (complete with foot rubs!) to transforming your usual date night into an exciting adventure, we provide actionable strategies to keep the flame alive. You'll learn about the power of collaborative decision-making in strengthening your bond and how to steer clear of common romance killers. Our conversation is packed with practical tips for expressing gratitude, managing expectations, and just having fun with your significant other.This episode is a call to action for every married couple seeking to reignite their spark. Tune in now to Reviving Romance and Intimacy with Dating Coach Julie Balkman and get one step closer to a more intimate, fulfilling marriage.For ongoing relational support and skill building, check out the Passionate Marriage Club here --> https://monicatanner.com/club

Are you ready to supercharge your relationship in 2024?In this episode, I'm sharing a game-changing lesson from my own experiences in 2023 that I'm carrying forward to make this year the best yet! After examining the last year to understand what worked and what didn't, and embracing the lessons learned from challenging moments, I'm sharing with you a practice that will help ALL couples build more trust and intimacy this year. I'm revealing the key habits that keep couples thriving, including the essential practice of regular date nights. Click HERE to get my list of 102 creative winter date night ideas to make prioritizing time with your partner even easier.

Discover the secrets to maintaining both a successful business and a thriving marriage with Couplepreneurs founders Kyle and Ariel Tresch. On the heels of National Divorce Day, we're talking about how to foster unity, respect differences, and collaborate effectively to create a legacy of love and achievement.We discuss maintaining a clear and heartfelt dialogue with your significant other amidst the demands of entrepreneurship.  And, we cover creating a sanctuary at home, where you can transition into your most authentic selves, fostering a supportive and understanding environment.Please accept our invitation to the 2nd Annual Couplepreneur Live event, a space designed to ignite growth and magic for entrepreneurial couples. Don't miss out on this chance to transform not just your business, but the very fabric of your relationship. Learn more here --> https://www.kyleandariel.com/cpliveLearn more about our community for committed couples who want to elevate their relational skillsets and get weekly creative date ideas here --> https://monicatanner.com/club

Ever feel like your happiness is being held hostage to someone else's behavior? You're about to discover how to liberate it. Today's episode touches on 3 disempowering thought patterns that are making you miserable and how to break them so you can experience more joy and intimacy.1. The 'if-then' cycle, that pesky thought pattern that tricks us into believing our joy depends on our partners' actions. 2. Say goodbye to the unnoticed sacrifices of the martyr mentality, as we explore strategies to voice your needs and desires without the silent suffering. 3. Stop saying there's no time or energy for connection with your partner.This episode isn't just about avoiding the common pitfalls—it's a treasure trove of advice for those ready to rekindle the flame and choose love, every single day.Download 102 Winter Date Night Ideas to help you create fun and seasonal dates even in the busiest seasons --> https://monicatanner.com/winterdatesCheck out the exclusive community for couples who are ready to experience more intimacy and connection. It's called the Passionate Marriage Club and you can get all the details here --> https://monicatanner.com/club

Do the holidays feel more like chaos than coziness? During the festive rush, do you feel the intimacy with your spouse dwindling? I'm here to guide you how to maintain that spark during the busiest time of the year. This episode is full of easy and quick ways to fan the flames of intimacy, with creative date night ideas and meaningful ways to show your spouse they're your top priority.Don't let the holiday hustle cause you to lose sight of the one who matters the most – your partner. Amid the excitement of creating magic for the little ones and juggling a myriad of emotions, your bond with your spouse can often be neglected.  I'm sharing tips on how to keep your date nights alive (even at home), how to express your love and appreciation for your spouse, and of course, the importance of planning some sexy time amidst the decorations and gift-wrapping.  And don't forget to take our intimacy level quiz at https://monicatanner.com/quiz to discover your intimacy level and get tips to enhance it. 

Today, we are talking about the law of sacred spaces.How can we delineate physically, mentally and emotionally the different hats we wear in our work life and personal life?You are not just an entrepreneur/employee or only a spouse – you are both, and your roles deserve equal attention. The harmony between business success and personal life fulfillment often sets the foundation for sustainable growth in both areas. Implementation: Set clear, actionable goals for your business and family. Develop a daily schedule where you allocate specific hours to your business, your family, and self-care. Have regular check-ins with your spouse to discuss each other's roles and challenges. Learn to delegate tasks both in business and at home. If you would like additional help with this or any other concept that strengthens your marriage and sets you up for success, consider checking out the Passionate Marriage Club here --> https://monicatanner.com/club.