Hand in Hand Parenting: The Podcast

Now that the Hand in Hand podcast is on hiatus, are you wondering where to get parenting support direct to your eats? You're invited to join Abigail during the hiatus for her Mother Flipping Awesome podcast where she does a deep dive with one mama in each show. And you get to listen in. #mindflip #parentingtransformed

This week: Handling Halloween Using the Hand in Hand Tools So, your kids are fighting over the Halloween candy stash, and their sugar highs (and begging for more) send your blood pressure soaring. Maybe you have a child who is scarred by scare season's ghosts and ghouls - or simply refuses to be a part of the festivities. Have no fear! Elle and Abigail show you how to handle common Halloween howls using the Hand in Hand tools. Settle back with your pumpkin latte and get tricks you can use to make Halloween the family-centred treat you deserve. Take a sneak peek into this week's podcast: Why Halloween can bring out the worst in our kids What happens to a child’s brain when they are melting down and how you can respond in a way that reaches and nurtures Which Hand in Hand tools are most useful for handling the Halloween howls Abigail's genius route to peaceful resolutions when two or more kids are going at it How to play your way out of scare season fear and even anger Listen now! Get more great resources for handling Halloween with calm and confidence: For kids that are scared or fearful: How to Help Kids Face Their Fears with Play For help setting limits on candy: Loving the Candy (Setting Limits at Halloween) Free Guide to Sibling Rivalry Fights over candy, toys, time and your attention? You need this free guide on Surviving Sibling Rivalry using Hand in Hand Parenting tools and ideas. Sign up to Abigail's New Podcast Every week Abigail will walk along with a parent, right in their shoes, working with them to flip their parenting challenges. Visitwww.motherflippingawesome.com/mfapodcast

Happy 100! This week - for our 100th episode - we turned the microphone over to you all. And we are SO excited to share this episode. You'll hear just what led parents to the Hand in Hand podcast, the breathtaking transformations you have seen happen in your parenting, and the different ways you all use the podcast from week to week. We're thrilled and humbled by the community that has gathered since we started the Hand in Hand Parenting podcast two years ago! This Week We Listen To Your Voices Take a listen and see if you hear yourself! There's comments that'll make you laugh, comments that'll have you nodding your head in agreement, and comments that will surely tug at your heartstrings. But at the centre of it all is immense caring, movement and community. And it's so powerful! Your good work is a force for change. You're telling us how your perspectives are shifting, and with them, your struggles. We hear how you are becoming more playful with your kids and more understanding. You are embracing being the parents you knew you could be. Triple yee-haa! We wanted to thank you so much for being with us each week because you are as much of this podcast as us. Get ready to be uplifted hearing all that you are and all that you aspire to be. Listen to You're Invited To The Celebration now. We can't wait for you to hear this. Oh, and a million hugs and thanks for everyone who sent messages and emails to be included in this episode. We are touched and honored by your contributions More Resources for Getting The Support You Need As A Parent This episode shows just how valuable regular support and guidance can be to your parenting. Do these three things to ensure that you get that support for yourself: Join our Group. Did you know you can dive into our free Parent Connect group? Our instructors are in there daily sharing tools, ideas and advice on Hand in Hand Parenting. Not on Facebook? We hear you, but this was the most accessible platform we could find. We think it's worth joining just for this group. Keep up with Abigail. Abigail is about ready to release her own podcast. Every week she'll be walking along with one parent, right in their shoes, working with them to flip their parenting challenges. Visit www.motherflippingawesome.com to see when it's happening. Get weekly Hand in Hand Parenting inspiration right to your inbox. Every week we highlight strategies around a parenting challenge, share freebies and checklists, new videos and interviews, and show you how to make the most of Hand in Hand Parenting. You'll also be the first to know when the podcast returns for its second series. Get it here. 

Where were you two years ago in parenting? Sometimes we get so caught up in the present-day challenges we forget to look back and see the progress we've made.  And we should!  A week before the 100th episode of the Hand in Hand Parenting Podcast,  Elle and Abigail do just that, with an affectionate look back over the last two years they’ve been making the podcast. Abigail talks about how her kids have adopted, rely on, and now take ownership of the tools, and Elle recalls the sleeping and eating challenges they’ve overcome, plus how emotionally aware her kids are since the tools have become a regular feature of family life. Now, your turn! Here's why we need to look back sometimes... This episode serves as a reminder of all the miraculous change and good you are doing now and can expect more of in the future. Listen this week and then scan back over your own milestones, challenges and successes and drink in how far you've come.  How many can you chalk up? Listen to So, How Far Have Your Come in Your Parenting? Come celebrate the amazing work you are doing as parents.  More support for your parenting Get these five ideas to make parenting less stressful to keep close when things get hard Read A Love Letter to Parents Can't chalk up any recent high points? Listen to Are You Headed for Parent Burnout? Stay connected We’d love to hear about your parenting challenges. You can follow Hand in Hand on Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, and Instagram. Be sure to drop Elle and Abigail a message at podcast@handinhandparenting.org Listen on iTunes. Listen on Stitcher Don’t forget to subscribe! Get weekly tips, ideas, and inspiration for your parenting in our newsletter  

  Your heart sinks as you join the long line of people snaking the aisle at the grocery store. Your baby is already making those noises she makes when she wants you to hold her, and there are about 15 minutes until she needs feeding. You are pretty sure this line will take double that. How did this happen? You tried to get out to the store all day, but between your friend dropping in, the late nap, and your toddler refusing to get on his shoes you arrived late. (There's 15 playful ideas for getting out the house here).  Now, he’s begging for snacks, your baby’s cries are escalating and this line doesn’t seem to be moving. You pull your baby out of the cart and land her on your hips and she quiets for a few minutes. But with about three people ahead of you, she’s screaming again. She’s late for her feed. You notice your son has dumped a few fistfuls of candy bars into the cart, and he wails as your dump them back out. The baby cries harder, and you quickly unbutton your shirt so she can feed, you can pay, and you can all get to the car. You fumble in your bag for the dried apples your son likes and hand him one.  You breathe. It’s going to be ok... An Already Hard Situation Gets Harder And then a stranger taps you on the shoulder. “The feeding room is over there,” she nods. “You shouldn’t breastfeed here. It's offensive." The Best Ways to Rise Strong after Mom Shame  Have you ever been mom-shamed? Or felt judgment in your parenting choices? That moment when things are already feel bad and some person moves in and just makes things feel a hundred times worse? Join us this week as Abigail describes the gut-wrenching time she got mom-shamed smack bang during one of her most desperate times in parenting. She explains the exact advice she got that helped her rise strong and move on from mom shame, and we talk about how you can too.  See mom-shaming for what it really is Who to turn to when you've been mom-shamed Why you deserve support when parenting gets hard Small but mighty ways you can help empower other moms and pass mom caring on Bounce back from parent shame. Join us this week for The Best Ways to Rise Strong After Mom Shame. Get More Resouces For Rising Strong After Mom Shame Abigail invites you to join this intimate call with five of the wonderful mom's she's worked with. Find out what transformations they made in their families, and how you can too. Sign up now - spots are limited. Join here: https://www.motherflippingawesome.com/meet-mfa-mamas

So, today we’re talking about the less sunny side of parenting. And when we say less sunny, we really mean those dark, never-ending winter-like days that are bleak, lonely and cold. They hurt. Some of us live in denial of these days - and it’s easy to see why. In a world of social media where every picture seems to radiate warmth and snuggly good feeling, saying your experience is any different can open doors to shame and judgment. Even when we admit it, it's often as whispers while we're alone. “I want to walk out on parenting,” is not something you’d usually proclaim at your mom and toddler group. If you wanted to keep going, anyways. But today we’re plummeting those depths in honor of us and in honor of you, because if you have no place else (and we sincerely hope you do - listen to suggestions in the podcast) this should be a safe space. You all are working so hard at being kind, calm parents - and everyone needs a space to rage. On the podcast this week, we’re shedding light on: Why parenting gets so hard At least three things you can try when things get tough How to find peace in parenting lightly when life is overwhelming One tool you must try to find hope in the hard moments If you’ve ever dared think you can’t go on with parenting, or if you’ve stuffed those feelings down so long you can barely feel them, we ask you to listen in this week. Join Abigail's Free Class on Anxiety Catch Abigail's free class on anxiety. Click here to get practical tips on flipping anxiety and living a freer happier life. Join class.   

Powerful ways To Solve Your child's sleep issues using the Hand in Hand Tools Your kid is going crazy about taking a bath. Just won't. You wrangle and wrestle. It's nearly bedtime after all. You are sooo close! Then when you finally make it to the bedroom, your child refuses to put on pyjamas. Then requests a drink. And then another. Doesn't want to brush their teeth. Needs a certain toy who, yes, you guessed it, is missing.  Will sleep ever come? Finally, your child makes it under the covers but as you go to turn off the light, your child screams, "No!" I'm scared of the dark." "Mama. Don't go." Should You Stay or Should You Go? And you are left with the question, do you stay or will you go? (Or at least try?) We called this podcast powerful ways to solve your child's sleep issues because, oh boy, if there was ever a parenting challenge made to test, it's this.  The end of the day.  Alone time insight.  A moments peace or a chance to rest yourself.  Sleep looms bright in our minds.  But so many times looms dark for our kids.  Why Do Some Kids Just Hate Bedtime? Today we're talking why kids have such a hard time with bedtime. (And why we do!). And why sleep issues can be easy to dismiss. Know this - they are MUCH MORE to do with us than our kids.  On Powerful Ways to Banish Fear of the Dark (and other things kids say go bump in the night) we cover: Lights? Music? Do distractions work? How to take tiny steps toward fear One key thing about leaning in and connecting  The counteractive way to banish bedtime blues Hunting down the feelings behind your child's words Listen now to Powerful Ways to Banish Fear of the Dark More Resources to Solve Your Child's Sleep Issues Like this thinking? Read Three Gentle Ways to Fight A Child's Resistance to Bedtime or Sleep and The One Question You Need To Ask To Help a Child Sleep Better Get more pre-bedtime games here: Five Games to Help with Bedtime Refusal Take inspiration from this mom's story about how she used play when her child got scared at bedtime Last chance to transform your parenting in Parent Club. Grab your spot now, doors close Wednesday. Click here to discover your bonuses, and everything else Parent Club offers you.

So there it is. An invitation. Your child is waving it in your face with a grin brighter than gold.   And you? Does your heart soar? Or sink? Acceptance Similarity Belonging Self-worth Influence Betrayal Here's Why OUR Friendships Matter Friendships can arouse big feelings - in us as well as our kids - and how we approach the joys and the ickiness friendships can bring requires us to separate. We need to remove the "us" from the "them." But it can be tough untangling our own feelings when we invite friends into our families. (or they invite us).  This week, we’re inviting you to spend a minute or two thinking about the friends your child has, and the common challenges that come up when kids make friends (or don’t!). From Friends to Frenemies - the good, the bad and the ugly with kids and friends An explanation about why kids exclude others that you may not have considered Why friendships are fluid and how to use the Hand in Hand Tools to anchor relationships When to get involved in friendships and drama, and when to let go Why your friendships influence how you handle children, friends and their fallouts One tool you can use to ease your children’s friendships along One conversation to try when your child is getting controlled in a friendship Helping Kids Get Along: How Laughter Can Bring Friends Together highlights a great way to help kids build bridges.  Need New Friends? It can feel lonely parenting in a new way. And it's hard to forge a new path without support. It's why we created the Parent Club, a daily online spot where you can go find your tribe. Get answers from instructors, tailor the tools to your own family, take classes, get coaching, and meet together for weekly and monthly Lives with instructors (and our founder Patty).  The Parent Club is open now - for one week only! From September 19 to 25th, you can join the Parent Club. Click here to learn more. 

Coping with divorce? When today’s guest, instructor Kristen Zuzek Volk, found Hand in Hand, she’d almost written off a loving relationship with her daughter. After divorcing, her two kids were screaming, crying and acting out, her daughter sometimes for nine hours a day. Coping? Not really. Kristen was hard on them, and harder on herself. Even therapy didn’t work, so a parenting philosophy like Hand in Hand was the last thing she thought would help. She was wrong.  Find Peace in Your Parenting After Divorce Hand in Hand’s tools brought dramatic change to Kristen's family. She learned how to see through her kids' “crazy” behavior to the deep hurt causing it, and she found she could heal that hurt using the tools. Today her kids are teens. And they are also a tight, bonded, happy unit. If you’re coping with life after divorce, find out how you can use the tools to reach your kids. How to hold them. Anchor them. Learn how Kristen dealt with custody transitions, differing parenting styles, and upsets that came with separation. And learn how she navigated Special Time and Staylistening as a single parent. If you are separated or divorced, if you are co-parenting or raising your kids mostly on your own,  if you feel isolated, or live with a partner whose parenting style is drastically different to yours, there's support for you in this week’s podcast. Listen to How to Keep Your Family Strong and Loving after Divorce.  More Resources for Parenting After Separation or Divorce Helping Children with Divorce or Separation is a wonderful resource. If you loved Kristen's reminder to herself "Do you want to do this the easy way or the hard way," print this poster for your fridge. (Wait! You're a dad? Then you'll want this copy!).  There are 12 Books for Children Dealing With Divorce here Work with Kristen Kristen Zuzek Volk is based in Colorado and works with parents in person and online. You can email Kristen directly here. 

You probably never imagined words like these erupting from your child’s mouth.  Dark. Venomous.  Hurtful words.  But here they are.  “I hate you!” Or worse. “I hate myself.” “I want to die.” Words that make us want to curl up and cry. Admit defeat. Give up parenting altogether. Except, of course, we can’t.  Even piling on hugs and love often doesn’t appear to soothe a child hurling those words (and thoughts) in those moments.  So what’s an emotionally-drained parent to do? This week on the podcast, we’re talking about the times our kid's words get hurtful, whether they’re aimed at us or themselves. Where these words come from When to take notice, when to take action Ways you can respond that shift those thoughts and feelings When play works better than words When kids say stuff like this, it’s hard. It’s worse when it feels like yours are the only ones saying them. They aren’t. Join us this week for support and suggestions for how to move on when your kid's words get hurtful.  More resources for when kids words get negative: For more about how kids acquire harsh language, read this article You can listen to negative language as you would a child cry when you staylisten. Here's the science behind the tool and how it works. What is Hand in Hand Parenting? All you need to know about the listening tools. Become Mother-Flipping-Awesome! Join Abigail’s rocking new community and be mother-flipping-awesome. Go here to get registered now. Stay connected We’d love to hear about your parenting challenges. You can follow Hand in Hand on Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, and Instagram. Be sure to drop Elle and Abigail a message at podcast@handinhandparenting.org Listen on iTunes. Listen on Stitcher Don’t forget to subscribe! Get weekly tips, ideas, and inspiration for your parenting in our newsletter

Want to increase your child's co-operation? Have them listen more? Reduce clinginess?  Sometimes special time can feel like the magic balm in parenting. It can: Boost your child’s confidence.  It can build their resilience.  It can ease your own parent guilt about not spending enough “quality time with your kids.  And, one of the biggies, it can INCREASE children’s co-operation.  It does all these things! We’ve seen it countless times in our own families, but here’s the thing. Although it can increase co-operation, it isn’t guaranteed to. Especially if you aren't setting up Special Time the right way.  So today, we’re talking about exactly why special time is so useful for increasing your child’s levels of co-operation.  How to set it up so that you stand the best possible chance of seeing this happen.  Are you using Special Time as maintenance or rescue? Why does it matter? And the difference between Special Time as a bargaining tool and the genuine invitation of setting everything aside for your child and the big effects that has.  If you’ve ever felt like Special Time wasn’t delivering the way you hoped, come problem-solve with Abigail and Elle on the Podcast this week.  Listen to Can Special Time really increase my child’s level of cooperation?  Set Up Your Special Time for Success Get all the help you need making Special Time a regular feature in your family. Join the Special Time Challenge, and increase your child's co-operation and reduce parent guilt.  You’ll get a daily tip to action to make sure you are getting the most you can from this amazing tool, and access to our pop-up group, with even more support, including lives with our instructors.  It starts on September 4th and its free, so what are you waiting for? Join here  

What gets you super seething mama mad? Is it the constant asks and requests, the “Mom where’s my… that’s so overwhelming? Maybe it’s the piles of toys and dishes and chip packets you asked to be tidied but are still smirking at you from the living room? Maybe it’s the stubbornness and defiance your child shows when you ask them to take a bath after giving them a wonderful day out? At least, you think it’s that the cause of all your parent anger! But what if that's not really it at all? What if the source of your rage is connected to the limits you are setting. Or, more correctly, not setting? What does parent anger have to do with setting limits, anyway? This week on the podcast we’re sharing what behaviors make us blow and figuring out why. We show you how why, when you peel back the layers of feelings tightly packing your parent anger, you might well find a mama who was too exhausted, too overwhelmed, or too oblivious to set limits with her kids. And we talk about why not setting limits leads to rupture.  Do you know the best way out of Parent Anger? This week, we're talking: How to start identifying your triggers and trace the source of your dissatisfaction Why setting limits (or not setting them) leads to arguments and rage What your parent anger can teach you, and how to recover from it The power of frontloading to keep your family on track and running without disruption Why good limits begin with getting clear on your values Abigail also shares two good tips for getting good “anti-rage” systems in place Join us on the podcast this week for Do you know the best way out of Parent Anger? Listen now: Abigail and Elle are Taking A Break  We’re nine episodes away from 100! And while we love and appreciate the chance to connect with you weekly, we also need to set some limits - with our own schedules. We’ll be taking a bit of a break after episode 100, and we'd love to ask you a favor! How Have Things Changed? We want to feature your voices in episode 100. If you want to be included leave us a message. All you need to do is to include these three things: Your name or pseudonym Where you are from And answer, “What has this podcast done for your parenting?” You can also call:  818-643-1714 And if you can’t call, email Abigail and Elle at podcast@handinhandparenting.org More support for Parent Anger: These five ideas and wonderful in times of parent meltdown: Crazy Mad: Five Ways To Ward off Parent Anger Listening Partnerships are THEY BEST way to offload anger and examine your triggers. We also use them to explore our parenting values. Download this free guide to Listening Partnerships to get some set up. For daily answers to your parenting questions join our wonderful free community. Join Parents Connect What Could We Do Better? While we’re rebooting, share your ideas! Please let us know how we can do better, and what parenting topics you’d most like for us to cover in future episodes at podcast@handinhandparenting.org Stay connected We’d love to hear about your parenting challenges. You can follow Hand in Hand on Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, and Instagram. Be sure to drop Elle and Abigail a message at podcast@handinhandparenting.org Listen on iTunes. Listen on Stitcher Don’t forget to subscribe! Get weekly tips, ideas, and inspiration for your parenting in our newsletter

If you catch yourself late at night, surrounded by toys, folding clothes and wondering why you don't have time or energy to take a shower, ask yourself: Why am I doing all the chores? Where are my kids when I need them? And why aren't those helpful little mice from Cinderella a real thing? And then breathe. Because chances are if you don't, you'll explode the mother lode with a tyranny of "Why do I never get any help around here? "Why do you NEVER pick up?" "Why do I have to ask you THREE times," You know,  all that fun explosive stuff you promised you wouldn't yell. Things Are About to Change This week on How to Make Your Kids Love Chores we're looking at some great ways you can actually get down and dirty with getting your kids on board with helping around the house. On the podcast this week, we're talking: Working with your toddler's natural inclinations to help Getting clear on what works for you and your kids when it comes to chores Working on a feedback loop that encourages chat and change Figuring out what's holding you and your family back from a workable chores plan The debate between rewards, charts, and consequences And Guest-Starring...Chores From a Kid's P.O.V Abigail's son even makes a (surprise) guest debut this week and shares some very insightful reasons on why he detests doing laundry! (We giggled!). Join us this week if you are tired of battling the kids around chores, or you just don't know where to get started on setting chores for your kids. More To Help You In Your Quest in Managing Chores for Kids Take a look at this primer on Hand in Hand Parenting's approach to chores Here's our podcast on Emotional Projects Remember that study we talked about where kids love to help pick up? Here it is And, since it's good to harness help in the toddler years, get this Transition to Toddlerhood guide if you have an ankle-biter. Download now Stay connected We’d love to hear about your parenting challenges. You can follow Hand in Hand on Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, and Instagram. Be sure to drop Elle and Abigail a message at podcast@handinhandparenting.org Listen on iTunes. Listen on Stitcher Don’t forget to subscribe! Get weekly tips, ideas, and inspiration for your parenting in our newsletter  

What's the one thing you want for your child when they are sick? To have them feel better. What's the one thing that most often gets in the way of that? When you walk away with a specialist appointment or wonkily-written script from Doc you have two things: A ticket better health for your child, hopefully, and also a potential prescription for tears and battles. How do you keep calm and carry on? This week on the podcast we show you how you can use the tools to overcome medical worry, emergencies, trauma and stress. Because when you are parenting sick kids, it isn't just them who suffers. Whether your child has been through common childhood complaints or more serious medical challenges, we'll show you what you can do to soothe things (that don't just rely on a spoonful of sugar to help the medicine go down). On Parenting Sick Kids this week, learn: How Abigail armed herself with the tools to make a complete care package for her son's heart-surgery - and her own sanity. This is really inspiring stuff. Why a slowly-slowly approach can eradicate all fears and battles What happens when medication NEEDS to happen How Special Time can totally turn things around - and what to do when it doesn't And how to take care of you, your other half and your kids when procedures get traumatic If your child gets dotty about doctor's visits or mad about meds, listen in today and turn that panic around. Listen to Parenting Sick Kids: How To Navigate Medicine, Worry and Stress And if it's you who is sick? Read this post on how to be sick and a mom Parenting a sick child can be hard enough, and it gets even tougher when your other child feels left out. Discover how to balance things out in this post  Stay connected We’d love to hear about your parenting challenges. You can follow Hand in Hand on Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, and Instagram. Be sure to drop Elle and Abigail a message at podcast@handinhandparenting.org Listen on iTunes. Listen on Stitcher Don’t forget to subscribe! Get weekly tips, ideas, and inspiration for your parenting in our newsletter

You probably got very excited when you discovered that Hand in Hand Parenting had five tools that could rescue you when parenting got sticky (or downright dirty). Very excited. It was the exact result you wanted Google to deliver.  It may even have been  how you found our podcast. You needed answers. Here they were. Even better. These five tools were kind parenting tools. They meant you could stop feeling like a demon mother ready to explode the moment your child said no, got sassy, or gave you a kick in the shins. Which is often, by the way.  With new and ever rosier visions of running together with your kid through green and blooming fields (or, maybe the park, or the mall if you are city dwellers like us) you couldn't wait to stop yelling and start connecting. To start forging beautiful, sunset-glowy memories... So why do you still feel like you are messing it all up? Your Parenting Fails are A-OK Why do you still feel yourself sliding into motherlode-ready-to-explode mode? Why are you tearful, or fearful, or just too plain exhausted to dig deep into the tools? (All you want to dig deep into is the cookie jar).  Why? Because, dear mama, if you set out to master motherhood you are chasing an impossible dream. We've been there too! Let us tell you something - we tell other parents how to parent and we still mess up. Bigtime! Yes, our stories are littered with so-called parenting fails.  Getting Real on our Parenting Fails This week we're celebrating 500,000 downloads (break out the ice-cream cake and some Pinot) by getting real about our parenting fails. What stretches our patience to the max? The moments we lose it (and what happens afterward) And how the rockiest parts of our parenting journey have lead us to some surprising new destinations See, we're learning (always learning!) that these "parenting fails" are not fails at all. (In fact, after this episode we vow to NEVER call these diversions that at all!).  Join us this week as we dish the dirt on our mothering mishaps and mayhem and share some shinier thinking on how it all fits together in the end.  This is for you if you ever felt like you failed at motherhood - because you just never ever deserve to feel like that. Listen now to How to Master Motherhood (and other parenting lies) now Stay connected We’d love to hear about your parenting challenges. You can follow Hand in Hand on Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, and Instagram. Be sure to drop Elle and Abigail a message at podcast@handinhandparenting.org Listen on iTunes. Listen on Stitcher Don’t forget to subscribe! Get weekly tips, ideas, and inspiration for your parenting in our newsletter

You just dropped one child at his playdate. Now you have 15 minutes to scoot across to the pool for your younger kid's swim lesson. Easy, right? Actually no. Your child is refusing to scoot. He doesn't want to put on his swim clothes. He won't go to the pool. "I HATE swim class," he yells defiantly. Why Reasoning Won't Work Oh, and when you tried reasoning? He kicked his scooter across the car park and laid flat on the tarmac. He isn't going anywhere. How Do You Set Limits WIth A Defiant Child? If you are using the Hand in Hand Tools you know that a child's defiance shows they are having a hard time. You also know that one of the best ways to work through this is by letting your defiant child work through their anger and frustration. Staylistening through their upset works great—when you have time. But What Happens When You Don't Have Time? Right now the clock ticking in your head sounds like a bomb waiting to explode. Your indecision on how to move forward mounts with every second that passes. You notice passersby eyeing up your situation, and you're ready to blow. Do you: A: Sit and listen to your child's outburst, and watch the clock tick past the start of the swim lesson. B: Pack your defiant child under one arm and the scooter under another and march over to the pool. C: Announce that class is off and suggest getting an ice-cream instead. You'll tackle this some other time. Surprise! None of these are right. And none of them are wrong! Today on the podcast we share ideas and tools that will help you decide how to respond when your child gets defiant and simply says "No." Listen in for: - Surefire strategies to prevent these stands-offs from happening in the first place - Why every limit you give your child is actually multiple limits bound together as one and how to unravel them - How to get clear on limits you want to hold and those you can let slip away - What to do when you absolutely, really, definitely need your child do something and they are defiant in saying no STAY CONNECTED We’d love to hear about your parenting challenges.;Be sure to drop Elle and Abigail a message at podcast@handinhandparenting.org

Your child grabs the one extra cookie you said he wasn’t allowed… What do you do? Or your daughter whines the minute she sees you pull out peanut butter for her toast... Or, when your son hears that his sister is having a sleepover he yells that you’re a mean mom...and that you have wrinkles! Yes he did. To Play or Not to Play...That is the Question Would you, could you playfully parent in these situations, or would you Staylisten to your child’s upset? A lot of parents ask us when to play and when to stay and we answer in the podcast this week: When to play and when to stay... When can you play and then stay… And why would you stay then play… Ok, we’ll stop with the rhyming now and get down to business. Listen to Yes! You can Playlisten when your child is upset. We’re talking: Discover the signals children use to tell you play is ok today or that it’s better to stay... Playful parenting ideas you can use when storm clouds are just brewing How to move from Staylistening into play How to decide if you are Staylistening too much when you could be playing instead And why play isn’t a substitute for Staylistening and why we can’t replace tears with laughter Become Mother-Flipping-Awesome! Join Abigail’s rocking new community and be mother-flipping-awesome. Go here to get registered now. Stay connected We’d love to hear about your parenting challenges. You can follow Hand in Hand on Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, and Instagram. Be sure to drop Elle and Abigail a message at podcast@handinhandparenting.org Listen on iTunes. Listen on Stitcher Don’t forget to subscribe! Get weekly tips, ideas, and inspiration for your parenting in our newsletter

Since we have all personally gone through potty training and we will all have to go through it with our kids, you'd think we'd have nailed down one, surefire potty training method. But the 11,000 google results you get when you type in 'How to potty train my child,' clearly shows that a one-size-fits-all approach is about as likely as you getting a 5-minute shower with no disruptions.  Yerright.  Sadly, there is no magic potty training method. And sometimes it feels like you'll still be sitting with your child and wiping their butt when they go off to college! But, don't fear... So Many Methods, So Many Questions Potty-train in 3 days or wait till they lead? Will pee but won't poop... Is fine at home but won't pee at pre-school... Pull-ups or bare bums? The questions are endless. Which is why we get wholly confused, flabbergasted, frustrated, impatient and exhausted when it comes to potty training. Does this rite of passage have to be so arrrgh? This week, a few ideas to help.  No matter which potty training method or approach you lean towards you can incorporate the Hand in Hand tools to de-stress the process. And we can certainly promise some fun solutions too.  This week, find out out how you can laugh, play and cry your way to the potty and back. You'll discover... Play methods you can use to reduce potty pressure and power battles. What to expect from the potty training years, whichever method you choose. Why we veer clear of rewards and use laughter instead A slowly-slowly approach that really works with fearful kids We're talking the good, the bad and the stinky in potty training. Join us for How to Potty Train Your Child in 10 Easy Years and then get the super fun potty training games in  8 Ways to Make Potty Training Playful.  Join the waitlist for the Hand in Hand Parent Club. Entry is closed right now, but we'll be back open in the fall. Become Mother-Flipping-Awesome! Join Abigail’s rocking new community and be mother-flipping-awesome. Go here to get registered now. Stay connected We’d love to hear about your parenting challenges. You can follow Hand in Hand on Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, and Instagram. Be sure to drop Elle and Abigail a message at podcast@handinhandparenting.org Listen on iTunes. Listen on Stitcher Don’t forget to subscribe! Get weekly tips, ideas, and inspiration for your parenting in our newsletter

“Mom, I can’t go to camp today. I have a stomachache.” This is the third time this week your child has complained of a sore stomach, and yet she shows no other symptoms of being unwell. You wonder…is something else going on under the radar? Does your child complain of stomachaches? Does she get tearful or angry regularly, refuse to go places or try new things? Does your child worry a lot, gets obsessive or compulsive? Does he or she act clingy or have trouble sleeping? Or, do you see all of these? what are the signs my child is anxious? Child anxiety is on the rise, but even if your child has not been diagnosed with an anxiety disorder, all children have anxious moments. And what can look like defiance or stubbornness can indicate your child is feeling anxious. Reading the signs and responding to them with actionable strategies can help a child shake off anxiety and emerge stronger and more resilient. try these 3 ideas to flip your child’s anxiousness On this episode of the Hand in Hand podcast, we look at the causes and signs of child anxiety, and Abigail shares three really useful flips you can use to turn your child's anxious behavior around. You'll share new insights and mindshifts that will point your child towards strength and confidence. Listen now.  More on How the Hand in Hand Tools Work with trauma You can learn more about the therapeutic benefits of using Hand in Hand Parenting here. Get download. Become Mother-Flipping-Awesome! Join Abigail’s rocking new community and be mother-flipping-awesome. Go here to get registered now. Stay connected We’d love to hear about your parenting challenges. You can follow Hand in Hand on Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, and Instagram. Be sure to drop Elle and Abigail a message at podcast@handinhandparenting.org Listen on iTunes. Listen on Stitcher Don’t forget to subscribe! Get weekly tips, ideas, and inspiration for your parenting in our newsletter  

Have you ever asked your child to do something simple, like pack their toys away before dinner? For a second they stare back and you wide-eyed, all chubby-cheeked cherubic sweetness. And then they scrunch those eyes and tell you to $#@ off? oh no, she didn’t… Kids who cuss are more common than you might think. If you put those terms into any search engine results throw up videos full of kids swearing. Some people, apparently, find kids swearing hilarious. Others not so much. And as we share on the podcast this week where you are on the parenting swearing spectrum has much to do with how swear words showed up in your own childhood. This week we’re talking about why some kids swear with glee and other kids, well meh, they’d rather go draw a comic. We’re talking the parenting shame and humiliation that happens when your kid swears and what you can do. We’re talking about getting light around swearing while at the same time setting limits on sassy language. And we’re talking about how swearing can offer fertile grounds for connecting. Yes, you read that right, you can use swearing to bring you closer. try a little four-letter fun… And because this podcast is the shizzaz we’re sharing four strategies you can use to get clear on where your family stands with swearing and handling your kids when their searing looks like its spiraling. If you’ve been asking why is my kid swearing? Listen to the podcast this week and discover why there may are many reasons your child is swearing, and why none of them are bad. a little something extra Oh and here are 15 of Shakespeare’s swears (that Abigail mentioned) and they are way too fun. Would thou wouldst burst? This post shares more on why kids get hooked on bad words and how you can respond. find your tribe School’s out and so are we Summer enrolment for the Parent Club is closing soon. Check out our special summer offer…before it’s gone Become Mother-Flipping-Awesome! Join Abigail’s rocking new community and be mother-flipping-awesome. Go here to get registered now. Stay connected We’d love to hear about your parenting challenges. You can follow Hand in Hand on Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, and Instagram. Be sure to drop Elle and Abigail a message at podcast@handinhandparenting.org Listen on iTunes. Listen on Stitcher Don’t forget to subscribe! Get weekly tips, ideas, and inspiration for your parenting in our newsletter    

You sink down on the rug in tears and wonder how you can ever keep going. Then you see your daughter’s abandoned stuffie under the sofa, next to an overdue library book, so you scoop them out, tuck them on the shelf, shove your hair in a bun, and get started with the laundry. What happened to your tears? You discarded them like your daughter did her stuffie. Welcome to mom overwhelm. Mom overwhelm is the science of feeling crushed by the weight of life and living it anyway! This week, we’re making space for overwhelm and talking about the ways we can bust through it. If you feel like a cog in a wheel of making breakfast and answering email and rushing to activities and getting laundry done and finding lost library books and washing bodies and reading story books and wait, when did you last really see your partner? Listen in. quick smart tips to conquer your mom overwhelm Today we talk turning that overwhelm around… Why is overwhelm like eating a really hot curry Why modern life creates a perfect environment for overwhelm to flourish How to cultivate walk away moments Why you need to listen to warnings as whispers and see if they grow loud How redefining your mom role can create space and recognition Why urgent and important are not the same thing How to go to bed feeling happier you moved the needle find your tribe School’s out and so are we Summer enrolment for the Parent Club is closing soon. Check out our special summer offer…before it’s gone Become Mother-Flipping-Awesome! Join Abigail’s rocking new community and be mother-flipping-awesome. Go here to get registered now. Stay connected We’d love to hear about your parenting challenges. You can follow Hand in Hand on Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, and Instagram. Be sure to drop Elle and Abigail a message at podcast@handinhandparenting.org Listen on iTunes. Listen on Stitcher Don’t forget to subscribe! Get weekly tips, ideas, and inspiration for your parenting in our newsletter  

Read on to learn why it pays to keep positive with your kids "Last cookie," you say, lightly. "No." Your son says. Then he stuffs the cookie into his mouth, grabs three more and runs from the room.  You're just about to charge from the kitchen in a chase when your eyes fall on another set of eyes. Your younger son. Wide-eyed and wondering.  Who's in charge here? his eyes seem to say. How far can we push you? Are you going to...lose it?  This week we're talking the kid that pushes your buttons...and the brothers and sisters who are watching.  How does what you say or do in the heat of the moment reflect on them? Abigail shares a big win when she got her over-tired tween to bed early, despite his resistance at every opportunity. But what surprised her most was how her younger son responded. Listen in and feel inspired if you: Struggle with keeping calm in Staylistening Feel like one of your kids is playing you or pushing your buttons Get sucked into debate and reasoning with your child when you set a limit You feel like one child takes up so much more of your energy than the other Power battles between you and one child results in your kids taking sides Feel like you always give in... You'll see how your responses can impacts everyone in your house - including you! And why it pays to keep positive with your children in ways you might not imagine.    find your tribe School's out and so are we Summer enrolment for the Parent Club is closing soon. Check out our special summer offer...before it's gone Become Mother-Flipping-Awesome! Join Abigail’s rocking new community and be mother-flipping-awesome. Go here to get registered now. Stay connected We’d love to hear about your parenting challenges. You can follow Hand in Hand on Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, and Instagram. Be sure to drop Elle and Abigail a message at podcast@handinhandparenting.org Listen on iTunes. Listen on Stitcher Don’t forget to subscribe! Get weekly tips, ideas, and inspiration for your parenting in our newsletter

The baby woke at 4am. His brother just 45 minutes later. Since then you’ve been puked on, drawn on, and changed three diapers. You burnt a bagel and your kid tipped his cereal over in a rage. Now the baby is screaming because he’s hungry and your son is pulling at your pants leg because he wants to play. Oh yeah. And it’s only 7.53am. Who you gonna call? Ghostbuster’s won’t help. But there is someone else. A special person who will let you scream about how bad your morning has been, and gently tell you they understand. Who will nod sympathetically and not judge you when you say that you are Just.Too.Tired.To.Play! Who will laugh with you when you admit, embarrassingly, that you just wanted to fling that dumped out cereal bowl across the living room, pick up your bag and walk out of there forever. (Or at least just until you’d had a mani-pedi/shopping binge/peace and quiet.) If you know Hand in Hand Parenting then you know that when the going gets tough we call…a listening partner. There’s no other place that offers quite the same level of support, care and nurturing when you are at the end of your rope with parenting. It eases exhaustion, lightens the mental load and makes room for more energy and enjoyment with your kids. But are you using your listening time to the max? This week Abigail shares a powerful story about how listening rescued her when she hit rock bottom in parenting, and her and Elle discuss the ways you can boost your listening time to make it even more empowering, supportive and freeing. And if you haven’t started a listening partnership, don’t worry! There’s plenty in the podcast for you – and some downloads below! On How to Superboost Your Parent Support, you’ll find: Why making time honors your self-care and enhances the work and care you pour into your family The times a light clearing out of your feelings can be useful versus times to probe deeper Three ways to get more from your listening time and really boost your well-being Still journaling? That’s great – but why haven’t you started listening? Overcoming the obstacles and actually getting started with Listening Time find your tribe Never heard of Listening Time? You’ll find everything you need to know in this ebook. Want to find a listening partner? Join our free Facebook community and post to get started. Listen to our earlier podcast and discover how Listening Partnerships can sound. Take the class! Be the best listener you can be. Learn the art of connected active listening and discover how you like to be listened to. This in-depth online video course teaches steps to building your ideal listening partnership so you can change parenting for the better. Learn more. Become Mother-Flipping-Awesome! Join Abigail’s rocking new community and be mother- flipping-awesome. Go here to get registered now. Stay connected We’d love to hear about your parenting challenges. You can follow Hand in Hand on Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, and Instagram. Be sure to drop Elle and Abigail a message at podcast@handinhandparenting.org Listen on iTunes. Listen on Stitcher Don’t forget to subscribe! Get weekly tips, ideas, and inspiration for your parenting in our newsletter    

The last time you asked them to tidy their crayons, they smashed the whole box on the floor and ripped up the color sheet. You have to psyche yourself up when you need them to turn off the TV, because…BOOM! Epic meltdown. Forget about asking for a hug. Your child wriggles away from your hand on his shoulder. Does every request you make send your child into a raging meltdown? You spend life walking on eggshells. (As well as Lego bricks.) But, do you know what? This is actually when your child needs you most of all. But how do you get close when your child acts like a tiny tyrant, doing everything they can to push you away? When it’s hard to even be in a room with them? you need to get close when your child pushes you away. here’s why. This week, Abigail and Elle show you how to maximise a special tool you can use when you want to transform meltdowns into closeness and co-operation. Use it to stop power battles and turn your child’s difficult, defiant behaviors around. On the podcast this week: Learn what your child’s ongoing acts of aggression and rage are showing you How to take shouting and screaming and turn then into smiles Maximise the tool so you two can laugh, play and actually enjoy each other again. If you are exhausted or confused by your child’s rage and meltdowns, listen in now and get these simple solutions you can apply today. get your guide to special time New to Special Time? Here’s a free chapter from our book Listen. Learn all about this amazing tool. find your tribe Join Abigail’s rocking new community and be mother- flipping-awesome. Go here to get registered now. Stay connected We’d love to hear about your parenting challenges. You can follow Hand in Hand on Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, and Instagram. Be sure to drop Elle and Abigail a message at podcast@handinhandparenting.org Listen on iTunes. Listen on Stitcher Don’t forget to subscribe! Get weekly tips, ideas, and inspiration for your parenting in our newsletter

Do you know how bad your child feels when they mess up? They may look angry. They may look amused. They may show bravado. But in every kid that messes up is a pit of shame, sadness, confusion and doubt about their own self-worth. How do we know? Because aren't those the exact same feelings we adults feel when we mess up - when we really look inside? And we parents often heap on that shame. You get into blame and guilt, lectures and stand-offs. Just the way you were treated when you were little. If you want to avoid the stand-offs, forced apologies, shame and humiliation we experienced when we messed up, we need new tools and new responses. This week we share three ways to respond that will actually build trust and empathy with your child - whether mistakes are big or small! Discover 3 Responses You Can Use To Build Trust and Avoid Shame On this week's podcast, we're talking mistakes - when you make them and when your kid makes them. Listen in for: Why confrontation and blame only builds kids shame and self-loathing Why empathy isn't a soft response when it comes to mistakes Why sharing your own mistakes maybe the best thing you can do when your child messes up Three different approaches you can use to build trust when your child messes up (or feels like they have) How to show your child that mistakes can be teachable moments When mistakes happen in your house, these tools and ideas will guide and support your child and boost trust. Join us this week for How to Respond to Your Kid's Mistakes in a Way You Can Be Proud Of   Here's the download Elle mentions. Reduce the stress of parenting! Get now Find Your Tribe Get ready to join Abigail’s rocking new community and be mother- flipping-awesome. Go here to get registered now. Stay connected We’d love to hear about your parenting challenges. You can follow Hand in Hand on Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, and Instagram. Be sure to drop Elle and Abigail a message at podcast@handinhandparenting.org Listen on iTunes. Listen on Stitcher Don’t forget to subscribe! Get weekly tips, ideas, and inspiration for your parenting in our newsletter  

How do you make like Meghan Markle and stand strong when you face loud and opposing opinions on how you *should be* raising your child? Meghan and Harry have broken many a protocol since bringing royal baby Archie into the world, from not using the royal family's preferred hospital to Harry holding Archie at a (delayed) press call. No-one is telling them how to raise a prince, not even the queen! How About You? How can you get the same support from your family when your ideas about parenting differ from theirs? How you can avoid endless confrontations and feuds? How can you stand strong when their feelings rock you and you face indecision and uncertainty about your parenting style? Hand in Hand Parenting can seem very different to an older generation, and even younger friends and family that find mainstream parenting practices successful for them. So, how can we show the differences in a positive light without alienating anyone? Listen to this episode and find out how to own your parenting when your family wants to rule over you. Why your parenting ideas rub moms and mom-in-laws up the wrong way and how you can ease this One easy tip for keeping everyone happy when your child moves offtrack and everyone expects you to act (and no, you won't need to time-out) How to see the good in their criticism and ways to handle their opinions Get More Support and Resources for Times Family is Judgmental Try these five tips for responding when you feel judged about your parenting Get the book Listen, to hear the 100s of stories from families using these tools.  Find Your Tribe Don't go it alone! The Hand in Hand Parent Club offers daily support from instructors, with free access to our Setting Limits class, and monthly Q&A Sessions with Hand in Hand's Founder Patty Wipfler. We're re-opening in the summer. Drop us an email at Podcast@Handinhandparenting.org and we'll be in touch about dates. Get ready to join Abigail's rocking new community and be mother- flipping-awesome. Go here to get registered now.

Elle confesses that she really sucks at setting limits with her kids - and together she and Abigail suss out ways to make rules, boundaries and enforcing them a whole lot easier. Join us this week if you've ever battled with yourself about when to set limits, or found that whenever you do set limits your kids just don't seem to listen. Listen to the podcast this week and learn Top 3 reasons why limit setting is failing you Ways you can reframe what it means to set limits Why backchat isn't all bad Why determining what matters for you and your family really helps you set limits more effectively. If you want to stop yelling and start setting calm limits, or you are sick of your buttons and boundaries getting pushed, join us for this podcast. More Resources for Setting Limits with your Kids Discover Hand in Hand's 3-Step Approach to Setting Limits in this free ebook Take our online Setting Limits class and get proven tools to set healthy limits that fosters closeness and cooperation in your family. Sign up here, or register for the Hand in Hand Parent Club and get this class free with your membership. Stay Connected We’d love to hear about your parenting challenges. You can follow Hand in Hand on Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, and Instagram. Be sure to drop Elle and Abigail a message at podcast@handinhandparenting.org Listen on iTunes. Listen on Stitcher Don’t forget to subscribe! Get weekly tips, ideas, and inspiration for your parenting in our newsletter

We know we love our kids, but that doesn't stop them being hard to like sometimes. This podcast is for you if you ever wondered how you were going to get through the next few hours with your kids close by. We talk about how we get to the point where the dread feels real and we share things you can do when parenting feels this hard. Listen to What To Do When You Aren't So Psyched To See Your Kids and Find the hidden power in giving in to a bad day Get play ideas and ideas for when play seems just too hard Learn how to hold off on constant control and mommy managing Why it's vital to have your own time to whine and tantrum sometimes We also wanted to take a moment to thank you for being here and seeking ways for happier days with your family - you are amazing for all the caring you do. More Resources For Help for Hard Times in Parenting This is the Listening Partnerships online class we mention. Don't forget you can get it for 25% off when you join the Hand in Hand Parent Club. Stay Connected We’d love to hear about your parenting challenges. You can follow Hand in Hand on Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, and Instagram. Be sure to drop Elle and Abigail a message at podcast@handinhandparenting.org

This week Abigail and Elle respond to a mom who feels like she sees power struggles, aggression and kickback when she's parenting the way she wants to, and compliance only once she gets mad. Are her efforts to parent kindly back-firing? And why would that be? On the podcast this week we talk about: What to expect when parenting with respect Setting boundaries on your own levels of calm Comparison parenting and why no way is the perfect way What power struggles actually mean, and working on embracing them as a win not a loss. Join us if you've ever felt like your efforts at being an empathetic parent are lost on your child and learn why that definitely is not what is happening! More Resources on Mean Words and Mean Moms This article on how kids acquire bad words and re-use them is very insightful. Read Bad Words from Good Kids. "Mean mom," comments can be very triggering. Here's how instructor Irina handles it step-by-step. My Child Calls Me Mean Mom. What Should I Do? Stay connected We’d love to hear about your parenting challenges. You can follow Hand in Hand on Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, and Instagram. Be sure to drop Elle and Abigail a message at podcast@handinhandparenting.org Listen on iTunes. Listen on Stitcher Don’t forget to subscribe! Get weekly tips, ideas, and inspiration for your parenting in our newsletter

You know about setting warm limits: Moving in calmly when you need to stop a behavior, but what happens when it feels like there is no chance to keep calm? Like, your child is about to stick their finger in the power socket. Or dashes out across a busy street. Then how do you set a warm limit then? On the podcast this week, we talk about the Hard No. And why no is hard! When no means no - and those times you aren't even sure your no needs to be hard. Discover how Abigail handles a hard - and fast - no when there is no doubt a quick, firm limit needs to be set. How to evaluate if a no needs to be hard. What happens when your no is hard and then you realise it doesn't need to be. Join us this week for Setting Limits: The Hard No, and figure out how to stay firm and keep cool. For more resources on Setting Limits, try these: Do you know what or why you are setting a limit? It can really help to know. Here's four limits kids need and why to set them. Read Abigail's post about how to connect before you set limits in One thing to do Before Setting Limits Want more on Setting Limits? There's 3 days left of our Setting Limits challenge. You get daily ideas for setting limits plus access to our online class on the weekend. You can join here. Stay connected We’d love to hear about your parenting challenges. You can follow Hand in Hand on Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, and Instagram. Be sure to drop Elle and Abigail a message at podcast@handinhandparenting.org Listen on iTunes. Listen on Stitcher Don’t forget to subscribe! Get weekly tips, ideas, and inspiration for your parenting in our Newsletter

Where does the need to be competitive come from and why does it rub us parents up the wrong way? This week Abigail and Elle respond to one mom about her son's competitive streak. On Help! My Kid Keeps Bragging we talk about: Is your child's competitive streak signalling some other need? Competitiveness and confidence Is competition bad, anyways? Why sometimes it's good to bask with your child in their glory Figure out what's causes a child to get competitive, and get new ways to handle things when your kids start telling you "I'm fastest," "I'm fittest," "I'm best." Get More Resources for Helping Competitive Kids Helping Super Competitive Children Relax Three Ways to Help a Competitive Child Tools to Help Children That Need Constant Attention This is the Hand in Hand 30 Parenting Challenge fundraiser that we mention at the end of the podcast. It's not too late to join... Stay connected We’d love to hear about your parenting challenges. You can follow Hand in Hand on Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, and Instagram. Be sure to drop Elle and Abigail a message at podcast@handinhandparenting.org Listen on iTunes. Listen on Stitcher Don’t forget to subscribe! Get weekly tips, ideas, and inspiration for your parenting in our Newsletter

So, you may be fairly new to Hand in Hand's approach or maybe you've been trying out the tools for a few months, even years. But at some point you'll probably - most likely when you are particularly tired or frustrated - ask, "Is Hand in Hand too hard???" We know! We've been there! This week, Elle and Abigail talk about when and why this question pops up. They explore the alternatives and share their own experiences about when it's happened to them - and don't forget Abigail has been parenting this way for about a decade! Plus, we also walk you through ways to get past this ickiness so that you really do find your calm place in parenting. We've been there too - it really can happen! Listen to Finding Your Calm Place in Parenting - It Really Can Happen and find out: Why we reach our limits with this approach Why other parenting styles may offer a quick fix that seems good in the moment and how this compares with Hand in Hand over time What we can do to get on track How to navigate those darker moments More Resources For Getting Support As Parents Haven't tried Listening Time yet? Read about how it differs from chatting with friends and post for a partner in our free Facebook Connect support group Listen to Abigail and Elle's podcast A Little Lite Listening Partnerships Demonstration For daily support from instructors, plus regular Q&A call-ins with them and our founder Patty Wipfler, join the Hand in Hand Parent Club. stay connected We’d love to hear about your parenting challenges. You can follow Hand in Hand on Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, and Instagram. Be sure to drop Elle and Abigail a message at podcast@handinhandparenting.org Listen on iTunes. Listen on Stitcher Don’t forget to subscribe! Get weekly tips, ideas, and inspiration for your parenting in our Newsletter

Join us as we continue examining how nature, nurture and culture affects boys and girls, with social philosopher and author Michael Gurian. On Part 2 of this series, Michael talks about how we can use what science says to raise resilient girls. On this week's episode: The way mothers and fathers empathise differently, and why this can be beneficial in building resilience and boundaries Why fathering is essential for adolescent girls, and what happens in same sex families How girls can get locked in perception and destructive thought patterns and how parents can help unlock this Why nurturing our girls according to their nature builds resilience Listen to Part Two of Raising Resilient Girls now more resources for raising resilient girls Learn more about Micheal’s work at www.GurianInstitute.com and read more about his approach to raising girls in his book The Minds of Girls. Join Michael and Abigail at this year’s Summer Institute. Hear Micheal on Part One of this podcast, and his talk with us about Raising Boys - Raising Boys and Girls Differently Raising a tween? Get help navigating the changing landscape and challenges of keeping connected as your child steps further into independence. With tools that supports you, your child and your relationship. stay connected We’d love to hear about your parenting challenges. You can follow Hand in Hand on Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, and Instagram. Be sure to drop Elle and Abigail a message at podcast@handinhandparenting.org Listen on iTunes. Listen on Stitcher Don’t forget to subscribe! Get weekly tips, ideas, and inspiration for your parenting in our Newsletter

Social philosopher, family therapist, and New York Times best-selling author Michael Gurian returns to the podcast this week for some girl talk! Last time Michael guested with us, talk turned to boys. But why even separate talk about boys and girls? Michael explains the fundamental differences in brain science between girls and boys and why these difference affect: How girls learn and process information Why the mean girl phenomenon happens and why this can be an important part of a girl's rise into maturity Why some girls are more prone to anxiety that can lead to self-harm like eating disorders Cyclical thought processes that can stall our girls' decision- and action- taking. Michael suggests ways that we can observe what's happening in our girls' lives and support them to be strong and resilient. Join us this week for some fascinating insight on how the world looks for girls and the practical ways you can guide yours. More Resources for Raising Resilient Girls Learn more about Micheal's work at www.GurianInstitute.com and read more about his approach to raising girls in his book The Minds of Girls. Join Michael and Abigail at this year's Summer Institute. Hear Micheal talk about Raising Boys on our earlier podcast Raising Boys and Girls Differently For daily support from instructors, plus regular Q&A call-ins with them and our founder Patty Wipfler, join the Hand in Hand Parent Club - your rich, deep dive into Hand in Hand Parenting

You may have heard about how your tenacious, persistent, negotiating go-getter is developing the skills he or she needs to be a great leader in the future, but daily parenting a strong-willed child can feel like an uphill battle. All those constant requests, desires, energy and power play is a lot! This week Abigail and Elle weigh in on why parenting a strong-willed child can feel so demanding and draining, and how you can raise your strong-willed child without so many power struggles - or the need to "break them." On this week's podcast, Parenting the Strong-Willed child: How an agenda won't help when you raise a strong-willed child How to harness your child's enthusiasm, desire and power Why these kids can also be super sensitive Learn how to dance between limits and freedom What to do if you disapprove of your child's nature and how to develop a mindset that helps improve things Listen to Parenting The Strong-Willed Child now. You might also like: Setting limits with a strong-willed child can feel really hard - yet they do really need those limits. This article shows how you can hold a limit with a child without breaking them - and comes with a free checklist. If parenting feels too hard you might find yourself yelling. Here's 15 ways you can stop shouting at your kids For daily support from instructors, plus regular Q&A call-ins with them and our founder Patty Wipfler, try the Parent Club free for 30 days. stay connected We’d love to hear about your parenting challenges. You can follow Hand in Hand on Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, and Instagram. Be sure to drop Elle and Abigail a message at podcast@handinhandparenting.org Get weekly tips, ideas, and inspiration for your parenting in our Newsletter

Did you ever think you got this parenting thing figured out only to find your child brings home some new parenting challenge? Maybe they start shouting potty words at you, seemingly from nowhere? Maybe they start throwing punches when normally they'd been fairly calm? Or maybe things simple things that you ask them do suddenly brings on meltdowns, where before they'd do it without a struggle? Where did the child you thought you knew so well go to? In the quest to find solutions to this sudden new and disagreeable behavior, you head to friends to compare notes, you hit Google for answers, or you even seek the services of a professional. After all, you want those words to stop, that aggression to fade, that resistance to disappear. But what if you started with "Why?" Why is your child so fascinated with hurtful words right now? Why does he or she have so much tension the only thing that angry words or angry actions seem to have become a default reaction? Why is having to hang a schoolbag so difficult now when just a few months ago it was a no-brainer? Why? This week Abigail and Elle respond to a mom who found surprising answers when she stopped asking her four-year-old to quit yelling and instead asked herself why the yelling was happening at all. We highlight the gorgeous ways this mom used the Hand in Hand Parenting tools to delve deeper, and the beautiful way her daughter opened up and let her mom support her through what turned out to be some very difficult moments in her school life. Listen to "Why?" is Your Most Important Question When Kids' Behavior Gets Hard and learn how to ask why effectively when you want to bring change. For daily support from instructors, plus regular Q&A call-ins with them and our founder Patty Wipfler, try the Parent Club free for 30 days. stay connected We’d love to hear about your parenting challenges. You can follow Hand in Hand on Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, and Instagram. Be sure to drop Elle and Abigail a message at podcast@handinhandparenting.org Listen on iTunes. Listen on Stitcher Don’t forget to subscribe! Get weekly tips, ideas, and inspiration for your parenting in our Newsletter

Three little words with such immense power. Following on from last week's podcast on children with anger, this week Elle and Abigail suss out why it feels so bad to hear "I hate you," and the many ways you can respond. Elle talks about the different reasons she hears "I hate you," both in anger and as connection bids, and Abigail shares why she thinks they hardly ever hear "I hate you," in her house. We also talk about times we can respond playfully, and times we can set limits on hearing those words, and times when "I hate you," is not aimed at you but is instead thrust at a sibling. If you've felt threatened, upset or confused about the times your child has said "I hate you," you'll want to listen into this episode. More Resources for When Your Child Says "I Hate You." Both these articles share where bad words come from and how to manage them in your house: Bad Words from Good Kids and When Kids Words Hurt  And we love how Hand in Hand Instructor Irina thinks and responds when her child calls her mean mom. Contact Abigail Wald about her upcoming 5-Month Transformation session keep connected We’d love to hear about your parenting challenges. You can follow Hand in Hand on Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, and Instagram. Be sure to drop Elle and Abigail a message at podcast@handinhandparenting.org Listen on iTunes. Listen on Stitcher Don’t forget to subscribe! Get weekly tips, ideas, and inspiration for your parenting in our Newsletter

This week Abigail and Elle respond to a mom who is Staylistening to her child, but never sees tears. Worse, it seems to her that the more she leans in to listen to her child's feelings, the more her child gets angry, starts scowling and tries running away. How can she listen to anger? So, this week we're asking if Staylistening should always result in a cry, and if not, what can we do? Why we as parents find it so hard to listen to a child's anger, and how can we trust them to do as they need with their feelings. Join us this week if you've ever felt like you've "failed" at Staylistening, or it doesn't look in your house how you expected or thought it would - we have soothing news for you.  Get More Resources for Parenting an Angry Child Sometimes all an angry child needs if for you to listen. Read Getting from Angry to Happy in 20 Minutes or Less Listen to this next - we talk more about Staylistening in this podcast: When Staylistening Doesn't Go As Planned Get the e-book Reaching For Your Angry Child Here's a free cheatsheet about everything we covered today around Staylistening. You can download it here. Get community, get support, get listening partnerships, everyday – in The Parent Club. Try it free for 30 days. keep connected We’d love to hear about your parenting challenges. You can follow Hand in Hand on Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, and Instagram. Be sure to drop Elle and Abigail a message at podcast@handinhandparenting.org Listen on iTunes. Listen on Stitcher Don’t forget to subscribe! Get weekly tips, ideas, and inspiration for your parenting in our Newsletter

This week Elle and Abigail finally meet face-to-face! No wonder they felt inspired to make this podcast. "It takes a village," so the old proverb says, and anyone who tunes into our podcast for parents often knows that this is all too true. In fact, it's the reason we made the podcast - to share a weekly space for parents so you don't feel alone. And, as we meet this first time, we also realise the value in coming together week after week to share, to listen and laugh, to comfort and cry as we make the episodes. And we want the same for you... Where's Your Village?   So many of our reviews about the podcast say the episodes help parents feel part of something bigger - and we want that for you not just once a week, but every day and at any time you need it!   Your village doesn't even have to be close physically - we're living proof of that! When you have a village, you have a guide, a force, and a strength behind you as you face your parenting challenges - and we've learnt this year that having that makes them so much easier to overcome.   We're asking you to think about who else you want in your village? It's time to reach for your people! Reach for your support, because parenting shouldn't be a solo sport.   Listen in today and find out why you need to build that village for yourself, and how you can do it. More Resources About Building A Parenting Village There are so many ways to reach out and get the support you need within Hand in Hand Parenting. If you haven't already, join one of our facebook groups: Parent Support Group or if your child is 10 and over Parenting By Connection for Older Children. If you have read our book Listen and want to connect with other like-minded parents, consider a Listen Book Club. For daily support from instructors, plus regular Q&A call-ins with them and our founder Patty Wipfler, try the Parent Club free for 30 days. For a deep dive into the tools, and an introduction to Listening Partnerships, with small groups of parents, take our 6-week Starter Class. And you can find all of our talks and classes here. Stay Connected We’d love to hear about your parenting challenges. You can follow Hand in Hand on Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, and Instagram. Be sure to drop Elle and Abigail a message at podcast@handinhandparenting.org Listen on iTunes. Listen on Stitcher Don’t forget to subscribe! Get weekly tips, ideas, and inspiration for your parenting in our Newsletter

This week, Abigail and Elle respond to a listener who has a 5-year-old picky eater. How can she get her to eat more than a few reliable meals? Elle talks about her own process parenting her picky eater, including how she discovered that a good, workable solution was as much about her as it was her child. And Abigail shares the varied healthy diets her sons sampled (endured!) following their early health scares, and the tips and tools she used to get them on side. On this episode, we talk about the many things you can try with your picky eater, including: Play - how it can help at the table and completely away from dinner Choices - What, how and when to eat, and variations you might consider Getting cries out ahead of the dinner table Deciphering the actual issues Why it's useful to evaluate your own expectations and eating philosophies as you work with your picky eater Finding peace with your picky eater! Picky eating can be incredibly stressful and frustrating, even for the most peaceful parent! Listen to How to Get a Child to Eat When They Refuse a create a workable plan for you and your little one. More Resources for Dinner Times and Picky Eaters 20 Playful Ways to Help Picky Eaters is a fantastic resource if you can be playful around food. Making connection as high a priority as your meal plan can help ease dinnertime battles. Read why and how in Are You Missing This One Vital Ingredient To Stop Dinnertime Battles Making connection as high a priority as your meal plan can help ease dinnertime battles. Read why and how in Are You Missing This One Vital Ingredient To Stop Dinnertime Battles Get your free guide to partnering with your child around food Get community, get support, get listening partnerships, everyday – in The Parent Club. Try it free for 30 days. keep connected We’d love to hear about your parenting challenges. You can follow Hand in Hand on Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, and Instagram. Be sure to drop Elle and Abigail a message at podcast@handinhandparenting.org Listen on iTunes. Listen on Stitcher Don’t forget to subscribe! Get weekly tips, ideas, and inspiration for your parenting in our Newsletter

Does it seem like one minute you were waiting for your baby to take its first steps, and now you are watching him or her as a tween march out the door, bursting with independence? Worries about tantrums and them sleeping through the night long ago given way to conversations (and concern) over mobile phones and curfews? As your child enters the pre-teen stage now known as "tween," you'll notice many other changes, not least their signals your child uses to show you they need you (and they still do!). This week Abigail and Elle talk about what they've seen with their own tween children, and the adjustments they made parenting them using the Hand in Hand Parenting tools. Elle talks about why she had to give up the words "special time," without actually giving up on special time, and Abigail shares the agreement she has with his son as they work towards him getting his own phone. Listen in this week and find out why it can be so hard parenting tweens when the boundaries keep changing, and why getting on their wavelength now helps foster connection that will last through their teens. Join us this week for Parenting Tweens: Keeping Close to Your Older Child More Resources for Parenting Your Tween: If you thought tantrums were done in the tween years, you're wrong - they may just look a little different. This podcast is all about Tweens and Their Tantrums Help for when your tween is angry - Read A Playful Response to My Angry Tween You still have a few days to pre-register for our new online class for parents of tweens, led by Patty Wipfler. Get information about the class content, and a special discount now. Click to get more information on our newest class keep connected We’d love to hear about your parenting challenges. You can follow Hand in Hand on Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, and Instagram. Be sure to drop Elle and Abigail a message at podcast@handinhandparenting.org

Have you ever asked yourself where the fun parent went? The parent you that says yes to play-dough tea-parties, the parent you that says yes to piggy-back races and then suggests races to the dinner table? If you have, you probably also have many different responses. You left that fun parent under the washing and work pile. You packed her away in your laptop when you went back to work. You lost him under a mountain of unpaid bills and worries. He got muddled in with the recipes you labor over that get returned complained about and uneaten. And still your kids ask for more. More time, more attention, more fun, more play. And. It. Just. Feels. Like. You. Can't. So the next time they yell. You yell. And you rage. And rail. And cry. This week on the podcast we're looking at that line we all meet as parents and wish we never had to: The Breaking Point. We look at why parents - especially moms - have their limits overstepped so often, and how we contribute to it, and why having our limits overstepped too much leads us to rage, confusion, isolation and, finally, parent burnout. How can you listen to yourself and the signals that show you're on the road to parent burnout? How can you give as much as you need to, get your own limits met and make them sacred so that you can get back to being the fun, parent enthusiastic parent you want to be? Join us on the podcast this week, and find out how to stop feeling heavy about all you do in parenting, and start celebrating everything you give, not because you have to, but because you choose to love - every day and beyond measure - the little humans you are raising. Listen to Are You Headed Towards Parent Burnout? More resources to help with Parenting Stress and Burnout Already at Breaking Point? Join Abigail's Intensive and rediscover how to choose love and love parenting. Contact her at abigail@realtimeparenting.com Understanding Parenting Stress - you just can't give what you didn't have. Reduce Parenting Stress: Why do we put off Listening Time? Don't! Listening Partnerships are gold. Get community, get support, get listening partnerships, everyday - in The Parent Club. Try it free for 30 days. keep connected We’d love to hear about your parenting challenges. You can follow Hand in Hand on Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, and Instagram. Be sure to drop Elle and Abigail a message at podcast@handinhandparenting.org Listen on iTunes. Listen on Stitcher Don’t forget to subscribe! Get weekly tips, ideas, and inspiration for your parenting in our Newsletter

Do you feel awkward or anxious about your parenting when others are around? Do you find yourself coming down more heavily on your kids when you are out in public? Or do you find your yourself wanting to set a limit but not being able to? Are you stuck when your child meltdowns while other parents are watching, or feel uncertain what others think about your parenting style? In this week's podcast, we respond to a parent's question about social anxiety when parenting in public. We talk about how to stick to your parenting philosophies, even when others are watching, and what we need to do to parent calmly, consistently and confidently when out in public. We talk about various ways to respond well for days you are feeling brave and empowered, as well as days you want to crawl under a rock. Get ways to feel lighter around parenting in public, resist feeling judged, and focus on what’s happening with you and your child, not the parents watching. We also share one practical strategy that helps you connect to a child who is melting down in public. Listen to this week's podcast, Parenting in Public: How To Stick To Your Parenting Philosophy and Parent with Confidence When Others are Watching. You'll stop worrying about what others think while actively showing them that a kinder way to parent is possible More Resources for Parenting in Public: This is the post that Elle mentions and has some excellent responses and actions you can take when you feel the heat of judgment. 5 strategies to help when you feel judged on your “softer” parenting style And this is a nice one when your kids meltdown in public. Helping children with tantrums and emotional moments in public keep connected We’d love to hear about your parenting challenges. You can follow Hand in Hand on Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, and Instagram. Be sure to drop Elle and Abigail a message at podcast@handinhandparenting.org Listen on iTunes. Listen on Stitcher Don’t forget to subscribe! Get weekly tips, ideas, and inspiration for your parenting in our Newsletter Got a Tween? Does it feel like they are changing? Growing in new independence, new attitudes. Do you feel left behind? Pushed away? Even if your tween doesn't show you they want you close, they do. And it's vital for their development. Learn how to keep close now your child is getting older. Our new class Staying Close to Your Tween will show you how to navigate your changing relationship, respond to the moodiness and outrage, keep close. Find out when the class launches and how you can be a part of it.

  Why are we always compelled to start a new year with a list of resolutions that even a saint would be hard-pressed to keep up with? If there's one thing every good parent is good at, it's over-extending! We're all about the #parentgoals! We are so happy to be starting the new year with you, our beautiful, caring community of parents. We know that you being here each week with us is because you are always striving to be doing better by your kids, in your parenting, in your communities. That's not a New Year's flight of fancy, that's a constant, and that's amazing. And while we think there's nothing wrong with new year's resolutions, creating new habits, bettering ourselves or developing new skills, we also see the pressure in that. Lots of pressure to do more, generate more, be more. So, how about we DON'T make New Year's resolutions? Instead, why don't we do something equally as mindful, equally as transformative, and, some might say, just a little bit easier? We're not talking self-care, more self-preservation. Because let's face it, we already have PLENTY on our plates. Join us this week on the podcast for an uplifting new take on New Year's resolutions, and start 2019 a little less stressed and a lot more supported. Listen to Why Your Best New Year's Resolution Could Be "No Resolutions"... More Resources about Parenting And Resolutions If you really have your heart set on making some new resolutions this year (go mama, go papa) you might enjoy last year's New Year's podcast - the one Elle mention's this week: Making Changes: New Year's Resolutions That Actually Succeed  If commitment is something you are working on in your family, this post will help: How to Help Your Child Keep Commitments   Start writing or type / to choose a block keep connected We’d love to hear about your parenting challenges. You can follow Hand in Hand on Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, and Instagram. Be sure to drop Elle and Abigail a message at podcast@handinhandparenting.org Listen on iTunes. Listen on Stitcher Don’t forget to subscribe!   Get weekly tips, ideas, and inspiration for your parenting in our Newsletter   The Parent Club is our monthly membership where we really put the Hand in Hand Tools to work with our families. Click here to learn more and get the support you need and deserve.  

What goes hand in hand with holiday gifting? Toys and more toys. This week we’re asking how you feel about toys, what decisions you make around holiday request lists, and how you can keep them in check, plus why we can all expect some meltdowns over toys in the holidays.  On the episode, you'll hear about: Overwhelm - theirs and yours - and what you can do to overcome it Envies and jealousies Getting clear on what toys mean to you and why Expectations and appreciations: Why your child might find it hard to say thanks Making room, clearing out, cutting down, and giving to others If you've ever felt overwhelmed on how much to give or how much is coming into your house at this time of year, here's a chance to mull over what you love - and might want to lose - about seasonal giving traditions.  Listen to Too Many Toys?  More Resources about Kids, Limits and Toys Read - Toys often cause big feelings for kids - especially when they can't have something they want, or feel like they chose the wrong plaything. Here's how one mom's trip to the store with her son ended in tears, and some positive steps she learned following.  Watch - Hand in Hand instructor Anna Cole reads about the time her son got violent in public when she refused to buy him what he asked for, and the strategies she used to handle his outburst calmly.  40% off Listen - Get over 100 real stories like Anna's of parents using the Hand in Hand approach to parenting in our book Listen: Five Tools to Meet Your Everyday Parenting Challenges. When you use "holiday2018" at checkout you'll get the e-book at 40% off. Show me how to get Listen on sale. (Offer good until December 31).  keep connected We’d love to hear about your parenting challenges. You can follow Hand in Hand on Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, and Instagram. Be sure to drop Elle and Abigail a message at podcast@handinhandparenting.org Listen on iTunes. Listen on Stitcher Don’t forget to subscribe! Get weekly tips, ideas, and inspiration for your parenting in our weekly newsletter

What should I do when my child hits?  It's one of the most common questions we get at Hand in Hand Parenting, and it's the content of this week's podcast. And no wonder. Hitting can feel dangerous. Offensive. Confusing. But if hitting is so common, why are we all still wondering what to do about it? There's so much differing advice! What Are Children Really Saying When They Hit? Abigail talks about all the quick-tip strategies out there and why they might work at first but why so often they fail in the long-term. We look at what children might be communicating through hitting, whether it's a (somewhat misguided) attempt at play or as an expression as deep-rooted fear, and Elle admits completely misreading some of her child's hitting behaviors.  Understanding Hitting and other Defiant Behavior And although we don't encourage hitting, we talk about why parenting the punch itself doesn't actually ease the problem but instead pushes the feelings causing a child to hit to one side. They may disappear for now, but they (and the hitting) will soon be back again.  So, we talk about what parenting the problem and not the punch actually means: Get wise to why your child hits and how to respond accordingly How to keep protected and still lean into the hitting How hitting can offer room for growth and connection as you partner with your child and move past hitting Listen to Hitting: Parent the Problem, Not The Punch and learn to set limits around hitting and respond in the way your child really needs you to. Because if you truly want to solve your child's hitting, you have to do the least obvious thing first - accept it.  More Resources For Parenting When Your Child Hits Elle mentioned the post When Your Toddler Hits You in this episode. Read it to discover more about this new perspective around hitting. We did a podcast with play expert Lawrence Cohen on aggressive play, how to manage it so that it helps reduce a child's aggressive behaviors. Listen to it here. Learn how to lean into the first stages of aggression with a vigorous snuggle. You might also like this article on partnering with your child which is what we are really talking about in this podcast, keep connected We’d love to hear about your parenting challenges. You can follow Hand in Hand on Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, and Instagram. Be sure to drop Elle and Abigail a message at podcast@handinhandparenting.org Don’t forget to subscribe! Get weekly tips, ideas, and inspiration for your parenting in our Newsletter Register for Abigail's 30-day re-set here and learn more about Hand in Hand's monthly membership

So, you want your kids to walk in the door, hang their jacket, unpack their bags, eat quickly and get back out the door, freshly changed, for practice. But right now you are at, well, walk in the door. BOOM! Cue screaming, crying, defiance and running in the exact opposite direction that you'd like. So how do you get from where you are now, to where you want to be with your kids? This week's podcast was inspired by a mom that worked with Abigail and feels like she can't get her child to do ANYTHING. Elle sympathizes, explaining that there has been a serious lack of 'tidy up practice' at home that can, at times, have her pulling her hair out. Your Blueprint for Building Better Habits and Good Behavior Together we talk about why things might be hard, and the steps we can take to encourage good behavior and better habits in our kids - without losing it. It can be really difficult to meet your child where they are, but these moments of struggle to master new habits can offer great opportunities to connect with your child at a deep level and bring about profound shifts. Why Building Better Habits Is An Opportunity to Deepen the Relationship Discover key ideas that you can start doing right now to encourage better habits and behavior - and why you shouldn't expect too much too soon. Listen to Your Blueprint for Better Habits and Good Behavior, and please let us know how you like these ideas.   More Resources for Encouraging Good Behavior and Better Habits Learn what it means to partner with your child: In this week's podcast, we talk a lot about meeting your child where they are before moving on. You can read more about this in this post Partnering with Your Child To Solve Their Issues and read one mom's story of how this worked for her. Work with Abigail Wald: Abigail can show you how to meet your child where they are, and respond in a way that builds connection and closeness in her 30-Day Reset. Sign up to join before her new reset fills. keep connected We’d love to hear about your parenting challenges. You can follow Hand in Hand on Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, and Instagram. Be sure to drop Elle and Abigail a message at podcast@handinhandparenting.org Don’t forget to subscribe! Get weekly tips, ideas, and inspiration for your parenting in our Newsletter The Parent Club is our monthly membership where we really put the Hand in Hand Tools to work with our families. Click here to learn more and get the support you need and deserve.

    If you were to see a job description for a role where non-stop, around-the-clock care was compulsory, and there was no training and no overtime, would you take it? Probably not! Yet, it's what we all sign up for when we become parents. Hand in Hand Parenting exists to support parents in this crazy difficult role, and it's why we make this podcast each week! We love love love you parents for showing up here, united in your care and devotion to raising your kids the best you can. What an amazing community! And so, this week, Abigail and Elle wanted to celebrate your role as parents and all you do that is seen and unseen. Take this as an inspirational message for parents everywhere. If you are in need of support, nurturing and community, welcome. Listen to A Love Letter to Parents now and take a minute to pause, reflect and love yourself a little.  Share Our Love Letter To Parents Please share this inspirational message for parents with those you might know who would like and value the support of our beautiful community. You are the parents who will #changeparenting for the next generation, making it a more supported and understood role. More Resources To Support Your Role as A Parent "The way that we relate to children, on the whole, is the most powerful engine for what changes the future," says psychologist Robin Grille, in this stirring interview with Hand in Hand's Roma Norriss. Watch Parents Are the Most Powerful Activists There Are Hand in Hand Parenting helps parents stop yelling and start connecting. Read how in How Hand in Hand Scholarships Help Parents Stop Yelling and Start Playing What causes parents to feel isolated, stressed, and overwhelmed? Get Five Revolutionary Tools that will help you relax and enjoy your parenting more. Sign up for your free guide now. keep connected We’d love to hear about your parenting challenges. You can follow Hand in Hand on Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, and Instagram. Be sure to drop Elle and Abigail a message at podcast@handinhandparenting.org and don’t forget to subscribe! Get weekly tips, ideas, and inspiration for your parenting in our Newsletter

  The holiday season is rolling around fast. Whether it's Thanksgiving, Hanukkah, Christmas, or New Years these festive times exist to bring family together. And while the holidays can be fun and merry events, for many of us they bring added stress to the package, and dealing with difficult family members can feel disagreeable at best, disruptive at worst.  Like... ...you can't stand the way your mom nags and picks. ...she can't stand the way your kids won't eat their greens. ...you find your dad's way of dealing with your children too harsh. ...he finds the way you deal with your kids too soft. ...Grandpa wants the kids to quieten down ...Grandma wants grandpa to quieten down - and doesn't hold back saying it.  Even families with the most well-meaning of intentions find that coming together requires extra thought, love and patience...and at this busy time of year, where do you get that? So how can you enjoy your 'time off' around difficult family members? Discover a Simple Tool That Can Help What if we told you there was one simple thing you could do to ease the tension, melt the stress and invoke a warmer, lighter atmosphere? Listen to the podcast today, and we'll show you how changing the way we respond to the triggering behaviors that family dish out will bring transformations sweeter than even the best pumpkin pie. When you respond this way, you'll forgive more, appreciate more, you'll laugh more, and love more - and actually enjoy holidays with your family. We all deserve that. Listen to Dealing With Difficult Family Members now More Resources for Keeping Sane Through Holiday Season It's virtually impossible to hold space for your kids and your family without someone doing the same for you. Listen to a Listening Partnership happen in real time: Abigail and Elle talk about the power of the Listening Partnerships and give a demonstration of how to do it in this podcast.   Questions For Bringing Change and Healing Family Tension: Use these great questions to see how you can shift reactions and try-on new responses to avoid falling into usual patterns around family. Read Questions To Heal Family Tensions keep connected We’d love to hear about your parenting challenges. You can follow Hand in Hand on Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, and Instagram. Be sure to drop Elle and Abigail a message at podcast@handinhandparenting.org Listen on iTunes.  Listen on Stitcher Don’t forget to subscribe! Get weekly tips, ideas, and inspiration for your parenting in our Newsletter

Psychologist and parenting expert Ross Greene coined quite the term when he said that "Kids do well when they can," but isn't exactly the same true of parents? Reframing your past could be the key to getting there, and becoming a more confident, calm and content parent.  Why?   It's highly unlikely that any of us here set out to be terrible parents, so why do we often end up feeling that way? This week, Abigail and Elle are looking at trauma and the ways that past traumatic experiences can reverberate in our parenting. Elle asks what exactly trauma is, and we look into identifying trauma and its after-effects. Past trauma can stall us in our belief and ability to parent consciously, but reframing these experiences can help us heal well and move on. Abigail shares a deeply moving account of her pregnancy trauma and how reframing her devastation transformed it into something positive and warm. Much of this came down to the tools she used after discovering Hand in Hand Parenting.  Listen this week and find out how the Hand in Hand tools can help you retell your trauma story, heal and move on. Listen to Reframing Your Past Could Be The Key To More Content Parenting. More Resources on How Hand in Hand can Help Parents and Children Recover from Trauma This article on Re-writing Your Trauma Story is the one Abigail refers to in the podcast and shares the steps she used to retell her story. We hope that this is useful for you too. You'll find more ideas about the brain's ability to heal thanks to neuroplasticity and more ideas about using the tools to move on from toxic stress  And in Can Hand in Hand Heal Complex Trauma you can read how the tools help children through traumatic experiences Watch Ross Greene talking about how kids do well when they can in this video We’d love to hear about your parenting challenges. You can follow Hand in Hand on Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, and Instagram. Be sure to drop Elle and Abigail a message at podcast@handinhandparenting.org Listen on iTunes.  Listen on Stitcher Don’t forget to subscribe! Get updates on everything Hand in Hand! Sign up for our newsletter and get a free copy of our Tantrums and Indignation eBook

  Sleep. It's up there with eating and tantrums as a stress-causing subject for parents. And isn't there just so many ideas, action plans and tools for change online or offered by well-meaning grandparents, caregivers, friends? We bet you could even ask your pizza delivery guy and he'd even share his opinion about how parents should go about getting their kids to sleep. Wow! That's a lot of pressure to Get. Things. Right. And a lot of room to feel like you've gotten everything wrong. To really feel like a failure. And if there's one thing we do know it's that pressure and fear of failure does not make for peaceful parenting or a happy bedtime. And you shouldn't have to feel like that anyways. Why We Wanted to Share Five Myths About Kids and Sleep So - we wanted to take a minute this week to share five sleep myths that seem to do the rounds at parent clubs and playdates - and seem to really rattle parents. Once these five myths are debunked, we can get back to our families and developing a plan that really works. Call it your own, bespoke, family sleep plan. Listen in to hear five myths about kids and sleep - and why they need debunking right now. And please let us know if you have any other myths - about sleep or other parenting challenges - that need debunking! More Resources for solving kids sleep issues Does your child fight sleep? This post suggests one question you can ask to help a child sleep better Fear often sits at the heart of why a child can't sleep. For ways to support your child to sleep confidence, read these Gentle Ways To Get a Child To Sleep Find out what stops kids sleeping, how to set limits around sleep and how to build your child’s sleep confidence. Learn more about Hand in Hand Parenting’s Helping Your Children Sleep, online class keep connected We’d love to hear about your parenting challenges. You can follow Hand in Hand on Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, and Instagram. Be sure to drop Elle and Abigail a message at podcast@handinhandparenting.org Listen on iTunes.  Listen on Stitcher Don’t forget to subscribe! Get updates on everything Hand in Hand! Sign up for our newsletter and get a free copy of our Tantrums and Indignation eBook