Thank God I'm Atheist

Frank and Dan tackle a full slate of religious absurdities this week: a Halloween costume sparks Christian outrage in Arizona, Utah quietly buries its own study on gender-affirming care, and a UK teacher sues for the right to misgender students. Meanwhile, school cancels a student play for being too “controversial,” and Delaware legalizes medical aid in dying. In the second half of the show, the guys dig into why young men are turning to conservative religion—and what secular folks can offer instead.

Frank is joined by guest host Rachel to unpack a week's worth of religious overreach, political absurdity, and moral panic dressed up as righteousness. From Oklahoma's conspiracy-laced curriculum changes to France's proposed hijab ban for girls under 15, this episode explores how authority figures use “values” to mask control. Plus: the Pope's childhood home might be seized, Rushdie's attacker is sentenced, and new data reveals why more people are leaving belief behind.

It's our 700th episode! Frank and Dan celebrate the milestone with some reflection—but first dive headfirst into the usual madness. Catholic bishops in Washington state refuse to comply with mandatory reporting laws for child abuse. Trump's appeal to Jewish voters is falling flat. The Episcopal Church is cutting ties with the federal government over sham refugee policies. Plus, attacks on Catholic churches are on the rise, and Jehovah's Witnesses are suing a whistleblower. There's also listener email, mosh pit therapy, and a game idea involving a MAGA punching booth.

Jim Bakker begs for $1M, NJ town wants to bulldoze church, Christian crowdfunding service defends racist woman's campaign, Texas give Christians an entire month, televangelist given 'gold-plated' AR-15, Southern Baptists continue to hemorrhage members, and the Catholics have a new pope.

Bibles exempted from Trump's tariffs, Trump health adviser cites "demonic forces" as source of childhood diseases, more bad news for Kim Davis, Sikhs shut down Pride parade in northern India, Mormons defeat Texas town, Utah governor says America should be more like Utah, and Donald J. Trump is a ridiculous buffoon who also wants to be pope.

This easter egg roll has been brought to you by, Veteran Affairs Administration joins crusade against anti-Christian bias, Target boycott continues past lent, state resolutions declaring Christ is king, cardinal who oversaw child sex abuse oversees the closing of Pope Francis' coffin, a Mormon education building on school grounds in Arizona, and apparently there's going to be another pope.

Cholera outbreak linked to holy water, BYU grad student deported, a rundown of Mormon numbers, Washington state makes clergy mandatory reporters, architect Gaudí on path to sainthood, quite the Easter costume contest in San Francisco, and those Mormons win in court once again.

Vicar has a theory about why church attendance is down, IRS actually investigates church over Johnson amendment violations, Catholic hospital argues fetus isn't a person (wait, what?), Heritage Foundation drafts new law in Tennessee, US State Department encourages employees to rat each other out for anti-Christian bias, church rasslin', and we hold a vigorous debate about debating.

Most American Christians don't believe in the trinity, Oklahoma's Ryan Walters sues FFRF, Trump supporters just noticed who's getting deported, reverend sues for discrimination, Poland releases shocking numbers about child sex abuse, shadow Catholics in Ireland, and Frank and Dan have a problem with Easter.

Preacher in hot water after asking congregation for $40k, tech CEO starts Christian services company, Mel Gibson's got a new Jesus movie, Japan shuts down dangerous church, Pete Hegseth's Islamophobic tattoos, a cracker miracle has been disproven, and why not let some woo in if you know it's woo (and it makes you feel better)?

Catholic Archbishop accuses Satanists of stealing consecrated host, Arizona jumps on school chaplain bandwagon, school board amends religious release policy, evangelicals don't believe in science (surprise!), federal judge in Utah sides with psychedelic sacrament group in freedom of religion case, LDS podcasters in trouble with church after being a little too honest on their show, and the terrifying stance of many conservative Christians against empathy.

Minneapolis cancels religious event on government property, Southern Baptist investigation update, pastor regrets money-back guarantee on tithes, Oklahoma bible update, Catholic Church faces setback in efforts to keep clergy sex abuse secret, water fraudsters held accountable, and what to do when someone starts telling you about a miracle.

Gay marriage denier Kim Davis faces another legal setback, airline attempts to serve non-Kosher food to Jewish passengers, Islam is the fastest growing religion in American prisons, Missouri tax break, legislative roundup, a new book, and our latest take on the measles outbreak in Texas.

'Cussing Pastor' is dead, a tale of two skizzes, the wedding cake strikes again, a congressman has a message for the soon to be unemployed, decline of US Christianity slows, some kind of good news from Oklahoma (for once), and the role of Christianity in America (and how we think we're fine without it).

Christians work to get a cross on the moon, mystic uses own blood for bleeding madonna statue, measles outbreak hits religious community hard, gay imam shot and killed, comparing religious nationalism around the world, renaming the West Bank, and the Mormon Church revises cartoons meant to teach children about polygamy.

Pope Franky gets cranky with JD Vance, states are suing to take away the rights of the disabled, a black church has fun with Proud Boys logo, U.S. schools are under attack by Jesus, Utah bill says you can fly the Nazi flag, but not the pride flag, a girl who was assaulted for not saying pledge of allegiance gets justice, and Kate fills in for Frank to discuss parenting in the new American theocracy. 

Frank went out of town, and Dan forgot that means he's supposed to post the show. Now it's just a mad dash to get this out to you, so NO SHOW NOTES! 

The Mormon cricket might be getting a new name (like all good Mormons [tee-hee]), faith healing follow-up, Oklahoma state senator proposes total ban on porn, priest gets fired after nazi salute, Quran burner shot dead, FFRF sues about tax exempt apartments, and the Mormon church issues statement about caring for the needy.

Churches are no longer off limits to US immigration officials, Freethought Caucus welcomes newest member, US Supreme Court takes up case to consider publicly funded religious schools, radical lawmakers attempt to change Oklahoma constitution, Iraq adopts law allowing child brides (as young as nine years old), a Russian tradition is threatened by global warming, and the entire political right is ticked off at an Episcopal bishop.

Spanish mayor in trouble for imitating the pope, some Christians actually are persecuted, Oklahomans answer poll about Ryan Walters, Mike Johnson offers another offensive prayer, update about the Mormon tithing lawsuit, how much did the Catholics spend on clergy abuse cases, and Christians waste no time fabricating miracles in the wake of the Los Angeles fires.

Special inauguration edition of the "God Bless the USA" bible, Mike Johnson recites fake Thomas Jefferson prayer, gay men allowed to become Catholic priests in Italy, televangelists mass resign from Daystar, Muslims convert to Christianity in Kosovo, West Virginia gives money to Ohio school, and how BYU's "loyalty oath" has finally ruined the school.

"Prophet" foresaw Jimmy Carter's death, Episcopal dustup and its resolution, Taliban announce two new policies affecting Afghan women, Christian "sociologist" links atheism to suicide and rape, the new congress' religious makeup, big trouble in little FFRF, and a new purity culture is sweeping the nation.

Christian realtor found guilty of hate speech, upheaval at Church of England, pay-to-pray scheme at Trump's inauguration, new guidelines for social studies education in Oklahoma, Malaysian man caned for violating Islamic law, Texas book ban leads school librarian to ban bible, and what's the deal with being "spiritual but not religious" and does the word "spiritual" have any use for atheists?

Christians porn use skyrockets, Christian university enslaves students, Vatican nears bankruptcy, Biden administration issues strategy fighting islamophobia, Catholic league posts billboard protesting atheists, Iowa says 'no' to satanic, and the Mormons get on board with the rent-a-Jesus family photo trend.

Ugh... it's true and here's what we talked about: Upcoming LGBT pilgrimage, a nativity at the Vatican (appropriate), a nativity at the US Capitol (less appropriate), a call to Biden, revealing cellphone data about church attendance in US, Noah's ark update, and we offer up once again our Christmas survival guide.

Bible sales are booming, anti-woke crusader targets Christian nationalists, Atheists are more likely than Christians to treat the other fairly, group kicked out of Christmas parade, Village People frontman comes out as homophobe, Christian lawmaker wants to rollback gay rights, and a health insurance CEO is gunned down in NYC and the internet breaks.

This week, Kenneth Copeland sentences us heathens to eternal boredom, India proves that Christians actually are oppressed somewhere, the UK tries to do the bare minimum for dying folks, Ohio takes further steps toward theocracy, an Iowa pastor shows contempt for atheists by depicting a jewish king as a badass, corrupt Texas Attorney General Ken Paxton proves he can be an a$$hole to Christians too, and Andrea and Dan discuss the many [not really] wives of Mormon Church founder Joseph Smith.

First millennial saint canonization date announced, Texas approves Christian curriculum for public elementary schools, Iranian protestor released from mental hospital, small town Scottish supermarket now open on Sundays, Pope Francis makes changes to papal funerals, AI Jesus debuts in Switzerland, and the very mundane reasons people leave religion.

Episode 674: Muslims who voted for Trump already feeling betrayed, head of the Church of England steps down, Iran tries new approach to convince women to wear hijab, Oklahoma bible update, retailer caves to Christian pressure, Louisiana Ten Commandments update, and Mormons just aren't as strict as they used to be (and that's upsetting to many former Mormons).

Church foolishly offers money-back guarantee, human rights orgs cry foul over Iran's execution of Jewish man found guilty of murder, neighbors say NIMBY to cold nights in Fruit Heights, CEO of Christian org is worried about children except the ones he harms, magician tries to make new Christians appear out of thin air (in public schools), JWs are NOT doing well in Eritrea, and Dan and Kate try to figure out how to deal with friends and family who believe stupid things

So... there was a HUGE miscommunication and this show didn't get posted at the correct time! Our deepest apologies! Anyway, You don't get any show notes this week. If you want to know what happened on the show, you're just going to have to listen to it! Thanks for understanding.

Suspicious 'Catholic' newspapers spew right-wing propaganda, Catholic Church attempts to cancel transgender rabbi's play, polio surges in Pakistan, a 'solution' to some bad publicity, Kamala Harris goes to church, an unexpected walkout at a speech, and the Mormon Church announces big change to their magic underwear.

Taliban bans images of living things, new 'Tree of Life' garden open in Utah, radical Christians say Kamala Harris has a 'Jezebel spirit', archdiocese to pay largest settlement ever in child sex abuse case, Islamists call for caliphate in Germany, 'Utah hair' makes waves on TikTok, and things might be about to get very bad in America.

Night of sex, drugs, and Catholic priests ends badly; school district rescinds policy; 'Trump Bible' headed for Oklahoma classrooms; does being Christian count when pleading insanity?; California sues Catholic hospital; and a discussion about how sometimes it's not Christian Nationalism, it's just Christians being annoying.

Jesus appears in unlikely place, unexpected results from Latin American poll, angry Christians call for Coke boycott, prominent Louisiana pastor convicted, anti-Trump political ad features Billy Graham, Oklahoma state superintendent seeks $6 million for classroom bibles, and the Catholic Church's attempts to find evidence for miracles.

Pope says 'all religions are path to God' ticking off other Catholics, the country of Georgia curbs LGBT rights ('cause religion), UK enacts buffer zones around abortion clinics, shocking percentage of Australian Catholic clergy accused of abuse, Pope urges Catholics to choose the 'letter evil' between Harris and Trump, Mormons in Arizona might swing the state toward Harris, and president of Mormon Church turns 100.

Mormon apostle and steaming pile of unpleasantness Jeffrey Holland decidedly does not apologize, study finds that Christian nationalist rhetoric from political leaders has real consequences, the Pope has a tone-deaf message for Papua New Guinea, and Lance Wallnau agrees that Kamala Harris won the debate, and he knows how she did it.  And also- it's our 666th episode, and Satan made Frank sick. Or maybe God did. But we're going to talk about Satan.

Rabbis launch their own fire department, Johnson amendment, Catholic Church dumps predator priests throughout Pacific, Catholic priests stuck in immigration queue, The Meeting House shuts down, Iowa really doesn't want Satanic Temple rally at state capitol, and a bunch of very not Mormon housewives still claim to be Mormon.

Timor-Leste prepares for Pope Francis' visit, Orthodox Church through the pandemic, Utah lawmaker posts racist video, teacher sues after being fired, Ukraine bans Russian Orthodox Church, South Dakota school prayer bill, and the Mormon Temple ceremony just got another rewrite.

Taliban fires men who can't grow beards, the Taliban also gets weird about the sound of women's voices, book banning is alive and well in America (but specifically Texas in this case), Houston megachurch lists mansion and compound for $15M, Mormon Church issues new rules about trans members, Florida's official tourism site removes LGBTQ section, and we feel a guardedly hopeful about America after the DNC.

Church of England pays off predator, Catholic charter school in Oklahoma, Oklahoma legislators 'might' investigate State Superintendent Ryan Walters, Pew world religion survey, proposed Democratic Party platform, Dave Ramsey lawsuit, and Richard Dawkins spreads lies about female olympians.

Louisiana has a plan to skirt the First Amendment, Evangelicals increasingly uneasy about politics, Evangelical leaders call out 'prophets', Rwanda enforces new church policy, appeals court sides with Boston City Council over Satanic Temple, new Episcopalian AI tool kinda nails it, and faith-based medical schools have us wondering what parts of a quality medical education they might be leaving out.

Priest sues Grindr, Hindu pilgrims reek havoc, Egyptian Muslims boycott new film, British response to stabbing tragedy, Mayoral candidate says main qualification for office is his being Christian, monk showdown in Greece, and Christian Crybabies and the Olympics.

Oklahoma school districts in revolt against state superintendent's order to teach bible, large churches are pushes small congregations out of the marketplace, Kim Davis is such a pile of poop, shocking abuse report out of New Zealand, class-action lawsuit forms against Mormon Church, why doesn't Robert Jeffress think god burned down his church, and do atheists need a symbol (something like the Christian cross, but not a murder weapon)?

Republican National Convention crashes Grindr, god-fearing olympians refuse to play on holy days, Taliban leaders filmed dancing, Taliban and women athletes at Olympics, Memphis school district owes Satanic Temple $15k, Paris holy games, and Trump now gets to go around saying god saved him.

Pastor assaults wife over flight upgrade, artwork controversy, baseball player gets baptized on the field, church insurance, largest proportion of new UK MPs take secular oath, Democrats urge IRS investigation, and 'America at a Crossroads' episode talks to Greg Locke.

'Tips for Jesus' gone wrong, Israel's chief rabbinate left 'unmanned' (there might be a pun in there), government minister suspended for 'black magic,' excommunicated Jesuit artist's to be removed, megachurch closes due to ineligibility for abuse insurance, British Columbia secularists win, and the Fourth of July just didn't feel all that great this year.

City confiscates church's loud speakers, an update about an atheist parolee, we actually agree with the Oklahoma Supreme Court, a story to remind us that Oklahoma is Bible crazy, ultra-Orthodox men must be drafted into Israeli army too, a Christian utopia in Nigeria fails (not in the way you would think), and boy oh boy... that was one heck of a debate.

Saudi Arabia is a terrible place to be in summer, Christains turn against their own because they don't understand literary devices, Christian Reform Church doubles-down on hate, Catholic church sued for torturing rather than helping, Christian University shocks everyone by being awful, Unitarians consider adding a new anti-bigotry principle to their creed and some of them fight against it, and Louisiana wants to force kids to have to look at a stupid and outdated group of rules.

A Texas church tells a blind woman to take a hike, a yearbook mistake(?) offends everybody, Samuel Alito is unfit to serve on SCOTUS (again), a Christian medical group tries to trick people, a gay Pakistani man makes questionable choices, Sean Feucht thinks his rights are being violated, and Christians are checking out all the gay books!

Colorado GOP wants to burn Pride flags, a question of women in clergy, an Amazon tribe gets the internet, Southern Baptist abuse reform task force fails, Oklahoma offers school credit for Satanic Temple courses (probably), a discussion about school vouchers, and so many people leave religion only to replace their faith with woo.