Podcast appearances and mentions of Wendy Mogel

Okay, you all, this will go down in history as one of our VERY FAVORITE episodes of all time! We have long loved and admired the work of Dr. Wendy Mogel, who has written fabulous books such as The Blessing of a Skinned Knee, The Blessing of a B Minus, and Voice Lessons for Parents. But we maybe loved talking with her EVEN MORE! She is wise, discerning, honest and DELIGHTFUL! We can't wait for you all to listen in on this conversation! . . . . . Grab a copy of Are My Kids on Track? to follow along with us through the season! Sign up to receive the monthly newsletter to keep up to date with where David and Sissy are speaking, where they are taco'ing, PLUS conversation starters for you and your family to share! Go behind the scenes and watch our podcast on YouTube! Download a copy of the Raising Boys and Girls Feelings Chart. Connect with David, Sissy, and Melissa at raisingboysandgirls.com. . . . . . If you would like to partner with Raising Boys and Girls as a podcast sponsor, fill out our Advertise with us form. . . . . A special thank you to our sponsors: Our Place: Go to fromourplace.com and enter my code RBG at checkout to receive 10% off sitewide. Our Place offers a 100 day trial with free shipping and returns. Nurture Life: head to NurtureLife.com and use code RBG for 55% off your first order. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Episode Summary: In this episode, we dive into the contentious world of sibling rivalry and fighting, a topic that often triggers frustration and anxiety in parents. We explore the surprising benefits of sibling conflict, inspired by Wendy Mogel's insights from her appearance on Armchair Expert. You'll hear about how these seemingly chaotic moments can actually lay the foundation for close-knit relationships in adulthood. We also discuss personal experiences with sibling dynamics, the importance of conflict resolution skills, and practical strategies to manage and even embrace these interactions. Plus, we introduce the "family battery" concept, a unique approach to curbing physical altercations while still allowing kids the space to navigate their own conflicts. Tune in to find out how to balance the discomfort of hearing your kids fight with the long-term benefits it could bring—and why sometimes, stepping back might be the best approach. Timeline Summary: [1:10] - Introduction to the topic: Why fighting among siblings can be beneficial. [4:22] - Wendy Mogel's theory on sibling conflict and adult relationships. [10:15] - Personal reflections on sibling relationships and the impact of age gaps. [15:30] - The hilarious (and dangerous) story of siblings power-washing each other. [22:05] - Discussing a friend's experience with a conflict-avoidant family. [31:40] - The "family battery" system: A creative way to manage sibling violence. [50:10] - The challenge of balancing conflict resolution with allowing natural sibling rivalry. [1:05:50] - Final thoughts: Accepting sibling conflict as part of building lasting relationships. Links & Resources: Wendy Mogel's interview on Armchair Expert Ralphie's Simply On Purpose (Instagram)  Jody Moore's Better Than Happy podcast Closing Remarks: If you enjoyed this episode, please remember to rate, follow, share, and review the podcast! Your support helps us continue to bring our insightful and silly discussions to your ears. See you next time!

Leslie delves into one of the most common challenges parents face: how to navigate a strong-willed child who doesn't do what you want them to do, This is first session with Louise and George who have a 6 year old daughter Anna and a newborn baby.  They bring to light the frustration many parents feel when their child refuses to do simple tasks, like brushing teeth or following a bedtime routine. And it is understandable when the frustration leads to the feeling that parenting is like a slog.  This episode also focuses on the different parenting styles and how that might be impacting their child's behavior.Time Stamps6:35 Start with Compassion for yourself as a parent since this job is really hard10:05 Mirror Neurons  Children pick up on what the parent is feeling and visa versa10:40 Patience is needed for when seeking changes in behavior14:13 Strategies for stepping into a conflict between parent and childBe a reporter and name what is happening - give information to othersDo nothingBait them with “I think you have something very important to say”Connect with your child especially when they are pushing you away with their behavior  “I am here and I want to hear you”“Hitting is working for you but its not working for me”Shape the behaviorhitting—->yellingyelling—--> using a talking voice20:35 Yetzer Hara and Yetzer Tov  - two ideas from Wendy Mogel's book The Blessing of A Skinned Knee23:35 Engage the child in “a plan” in order to problem solve challenging behaviors such as brushing her teeth27:05 The theme of connection and how important that connection is27:43 Getting at the root cause using the phrase “you must have a very good reason for (not brushing your teeth) or whatever the behavior is.29:50  Communication is more than just the words: 70% of communication is nonverbal.  Your child is responding to your tone, gestures and facial expressions. 33:10 Ask yourself how can parents have fun at the job of parenting37:07 Connect first and then ask for the cooperationResources:: Wendy Mogel's Book:  The Blessing of a Skinned KneeFor a full transcript of this episode and more information about the host visit https://lesliecohenrubury.com/podcasts/ . You can also follow Leslie's work on Facebook and Instagram. Join the conversation with your own questions and parenting experiences.Leslie-ism: Connection is the foundation for cooperation. 

This week, we are joined by Dr. Wendy Model. Wendy is a clinical psychologist and New York Times best-selling author. In this episode, we learn about the problem of device usage and how it starts with you as a parent. Her most recent book, Voice Lessons for Parents: What to Say, How to Say It, and When to Listen, offers guidance for communicating with children across the expanse of childhood and adolescence and explains the most effective ways to talk about your child to teachers, coaches, nannies and caretakers, grandparents, and partners.

Getting kids to do chores, pick up after themselves, and help around the house is not for the faint of heart. Meagan and Sarah are decades into parenting and can still settle in for a vent-session about dirty socks left on the floor. But we've acquired a little bit of wisdom along the way too, and today we're here to smooth the path for moms who want to feel less frustrated when it comes to kids and chores. Join us!HELPFUL LINKS:Sarah mentioned hearing Wendy Mogel talk about high-achieving kids and chores in this episode of Armchair ExpertSarah also mentioned learning an approach mentioned in the chores chapter KJ Dell'Antonia's book, How to Be a Happier Parent (affiliate link)Episodes From The Archives That Pair Well With This One:A Summertime Chores, Life Skills & Freedoms Reset: Episode 315Chores, Life Skills, & Household Contributions: Episode 191Chores & Delegation: Episode 15OTHER HELPFUL LINKS:Visit our websiteCheck out deals from our partnersFollow us on InstagramJoin our private listener group on Facebook (be sure to answer the membership questions!)Sign up for our newsletterSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Dr. Wendy Mogel (Nurture vs Nurture, Voice Lessons for Parents) is a clinical psychologist, author, and podcaster. Wendy joins the Armchair Expert to discuss how interesting linguistics are, how she developed her confidence to talk to strangers, and why she is worried about the future of young men. Wendy and Dax talk about how to notice the signs of puberty, why they feel kids have fewer experiences growing up than they used to, and big daddy love. Wendy explains how parents can manage their children's sense of fear, how diagnosing disorders has changed over her 45 year career, and why she thinks kids being taught manners is important. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Dr. Wendy Mogel (Nurture vs Nurture, Voice Lessons for Parents) is a clinical psychologist, author, and podcaster. Wendy joins the Armchair Expert to discuss how interesting linguistics are, how she developed her confidence to talk to strangers, and why she is worried about the future of young men. Wendy and Dax talk about how to notice the signs of puberty, why they feel kids have fewer experiences growing up than they used to, and big daddy love. Wendy explains how parents can manage their children's sense of fear, how diagnosing disorders has changed over her 45 year career, and why she thinks kids being taught manners is important.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Lisa partied too hard this past weekend and is now nursing an injury. Ashley is struggling to find the right karaoke bar for her talents. As always, Your Mom™ covers a lot of range this week including how to handle other kids mistreating your child, the role of music in family relationships, and the maybe the biggest question of all: why do people even have kids? Stories abound as both Bonnie Raitt and Ariana Grande find their way into the discussion and Producer TJ makes his debut in a bonus segment at the end. The book Ashley references as her favorite child-rearing read is called Blessings of a Skinned Knee by Wendy Mogel. Be sure to reach out to @adamsonashley or @LisaMcCaffrey6 on twitter with any comments or questions for the show. You can also email us at emailyourmompodcast@gmail.com. We hope you enjoy and as always, thanks for listening to Your Mom™ .

Wendy Mogel, author of Voice Lessons for Parents. @drwendymogel Topic: What to say, how to say it, and when to listen. Issues: How your vocal style affects your parenting effectiveness; how a shift in that style can lead to children who are calmer, listen more attentively, and communicate with more warmth, respect, and sincerity; best […] The post What to Say, How to Say It, and When to Listen appeared first on Mr. Dad.

Wendy Mogel, clinical psychologist and New York Times bestselling author, discusses raising kids through adolescence, a time of the “greatest anguish and the greatest ecstasy.” With humor and honesty, Wendy advises us to be “emotional archaeologists” with the kids we love and learning to “keep quiet, keep captivated and keep respectful” when navigating this tricky time as caregivers. Produced by Dear Media

Creative Parenting – Join Nina Meehan discussing imagination with Dr. Wendy Mogel. In this episode Nina and Dr. Mogel talk about how vital play and creativity is for families.  Dr. Mogel invites parents to be curious, calm and captivated listeners as their children explore the unconscious through dreams or imagination through story.  They discuss how creativity is essential at the core of the highest level of interaction for children and parents because children live in the world of imagination and play.  DR. WENDY MOGEL is a clinical psychologist and New York Times best-selling author. She serves on the scientific advisory board of Parents Magazine.  In her new podcast Nurture vs Nurture, Dr. Mogel provides guidance to parents around the world.In a starred review Publisher's Weekly described her—now classic—first book, The Blessing of a Skinned Knee, as “Impassioned, lyrical and eminently practical...a real treasure.” Her second release, The Blessing of a B Minus, addresses the challenge of parenting teenagers in a culture of increasing anxiety and rapid change. Her most recent book, Voice Lessons for Parents: What to Say, How to Say It, and When to Listen, offers guidance for communicating with children across the expanse of childhood and adolescence.~Links: Website: https://www.wendymogel.com/Podcast: https://armchairexpertpod.com/nurture-vs-nurture-with-dr-mogelSocial: https://www.facebook.com/WendyMogelPhD/Twitter: @drwendymogelAmazon Book: https://smile.amazon.com/Voice-Lessons-Parents-What-Listen/dp/1501142402/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1630005947&sr=8-1

With 35 years of experience guiding families through the ups and downs of parenting, internationally acclaimed clinical psychologist Dr. Wendy Mogel is the ideal expert to help Brit navigate personal parenting issues she's experienced with her two young children. In this raw conversation, the two cover the difference between raising boys and girls, how to help children who have anxiety, diffusing mom guilt, and where to find compromise between parents with different discipline styles. It's a vulnerable glimpse into modern day motherhood and full of wisdom about human behavior and emotions that any listener can learn from — parent or not. For more on Dr. Wendy Mogel, be sure to check out her podcast, Nurture vs. Nurture. For more on our host Brit Morin, follow her at @Brit and @BritandCo. Learn more about your ad-choices at https://www.iheartpodcastnetwork.com

During the pandemic, we’ve been looking at our screens more than ever before. As the country starts reopening, what do we do about our kids’ extreme attachment to their devices? How should we think about it and do we need to do anything about it? Parenting expert Dr. Wendy Mogel joins us to discuss these deep questions about pandemic parenting. Dr. Mogel is the author of “The Blessing of a Skinned Knee” and host of the podcast Nurture vs. Nurture.  Learn more about your ad-choices at https://www.iheartpodcastnetwork.com

Episode 10! Double Digits, Babyyyyyy.  Jennie and Allie are back from Spring Break, and have never felt worse.  Thinking we were out of the woods, after over a year, Allie's house was struck with Covid. The Mommies discuss symptoms, and goals for getting back to fighting shape. Who else is in?! We're thinking of starting a movement of strong mommies, with even stronger immune systems.  Follow us on Instagram for yummy recipes, and workout inspo. Or at least commiserate with us in the process!Fortunately, they are joined by Dr. Heather Orman-Lubell, who answers all kinds of questions, from Covid and Kids, to giving ourselves grace with screen time.  She gives us hope for kids going back to school in the fall, and discusses the importance of getting vaccinated. Below, is the list of resources she shares, for parents...and Jennie realizes she has some catching up to do! Thank you to Tim (@timbostwickrealtor) and Dr. Heather! And thank you everyone for listening!Parenting Resources:"The AAP Guide to the First Five Years""The AAP Guide to Your Child's Symptoms""Baby 411: Clear Answers and Smart Advice For Your Baby's First Year", Dr. Ari Brown, and Denise Fields"The Mommy MD Guides""The Blessings of a Skinned Knee", Wendy Mogel, Ph.D."How to Raise an Adult: Break Free of the Overparenting Trap and Prepare Your Kid for Success", Julie Lythcott-HaimsEMAIL: TheVillagePod@gmail.comSOCIALS: @villagecommunity @mrsjennieporter @smallspacemommySUBSCRIBE: Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Pandora, Stitcher, BuzzSprout

Can you remember the last time you laughed so hard your stomach hurt the next day? What about, the last time you were overwhelmed with an emotion like gratitude, joy, or elation? I can remember times in my life where my emotions were so muted, I thought my ability to feel truly happy was gone forever. The crazy thing is, I didn't even realize I was settling... Emotionally. In other words, I thought I was happy. I thought I was feeling my feelings. I thought I was grateful. I didn't know that I had gotten so used to stuffing or avoiding my feelings that numb became the norm... And that's without the use of drugs and alcohol! For example, I have a friend of mine that often says her life is at an 8, right after she tells me how depressed she is. She is unaware her 8 is really a 3 or 4. Many people are just like my friend. They have a disconnect between their perception of how they're doing and the true emotional dysfunction they've become so accustomed to. On another note, if you'd like to get some perspective on relationship'ing and parenting, there's a great podcast that's just launched about parenting and building resilients in your children. It's Nurture vs Nurture with Dr Wendy Mogel. She's sits down with parents for a therapy session and boy do I identify. Episode 1 was the episode I was laughing out loud throughout the day because it hit so close to home for conversations in my relationship. Be sure to check it out https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/nurture-vs-nurture-with-dr-wendy-mogel/id1549814799?i=1000509231238 ALSO here where you can find us: K Preston Moore Instagram @kprestonmoore Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/k.preston.moore Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/highcostofanonymitypodcast/?ref=share Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/65h0V990cXBZZ9Op20hYjA?si=NJTW7xS4STSKAOTY46HrFg Apple Podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/high-cost-anonymity-podcast-exploring-cost-keeping/id1357105789

Dusty and Tommy discuss the death of Rush Limbaugh and whether following current events in the news matters, or if the business of journalism has erased the mission of journalism. Then, they grapple with the some emotional reactions to America's ugly past, and how it feels to "rewrite history." Find Ourselves QoW: "In what ways do I want to be like the people that raised me?" Tommy's Recommendation: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/nurture-vs-nurture-with-dr-wendy-mogel/id1549814799 (Nurture vs. Nurture Podcast w/ Dr. Wendy Mogel); also, if you're going to take time off, unplug from the phone and email. It's worth it. Dusty's Recommendation: https://www.amazon.com/Divide-American-Injustice-Age-Wealth/dp/0812983637/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=&sr= (The Divide: American Injustice in the Age of the Wealth Gap) by Matt Taibbi Please rate and review the podcast, and share it with anyone you think might enjoy the journey. Follow either Dusty or Tommy on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/dustinriedesel/?hl=en (@dustinriedesel) & https://www.instagram.com/tommycooksey/?hl=en (@tommycooksey)

Dr. Mogel speaks with family #1: Erick and Elsie and answers the question: Will our children hate us if we stop loving them so much? She also teaches us a new word: Familect Listen to a BONUS EPISODE right now on the Nurture vs Nurture feed. And make sure to subscribe to weekly episodes, dropping every Tuesday only on the Nurture vs Nurture feed. Just search “Nurture vs Nurture” on Apple Podcast, Spotify, or wherever you listen to podcasts. Or visit bit.ly/wendymogel.

Nurture vs Nurture is a new podcast brought to you by the producers of Armchair Expert. Dr. Wendy Mogel, social-clinical psychologist and author, specializes in the protection and promotion of self-reliance, resilience, accountability and exuberance in children and she is our fearless leader in this new endeavor. Each week, Dr. Wendy sits down with a different set of parents for a therapy session. She brings her forty years of experience working with families to these intimate and wonderfully voyeuristic conversations. This podcast allows the listener to go on another family's journey and to receive practical advice along the way. Wendy proves that, perhaps counterintuitively, there is nothing more universal than our specificity. In each episode, Wendy also introduces us to a foreign word that is untranslatable into English in order to enhance our minds and vocabularies on parenthood, family and communication with those we love the most.

In this podcast, I am talking about the relationship between parents and children. How could they make it better and strong by friendly and open communication and create new memories of life. How to make a happy child? Understand the importance of communication between parents and children.  Books:-  1. 7 Skills of Amazing Parents: A Simplified Guide to Parenting- Dr. V.S. Jithendra (https://amzn.to/3pXethp)  2. The Conscious Parent: Transforming Ourselves Empowering Our Children- Dr. Shefali Tsabary (https://amzn.to/36ZQ16o)  3. Voice Lessons For Parents: What to Say, How to Say it and When to Listen- Dr. Dr. Wendy Mogel (https://amzn.to/374rOvM)  #parentschildrelationship #motivationalhindipodcast #importanceofcommunicationbetweenparentsandchild #communicationbetweenparentsandchild #importanceofcommunication #parentsandchildren #themomslife #themomslifemomentsofmotivation #hindipodcast #podcast #hindi #motivationalaudio #motivationalpodcastinhindi #podcastinhindi #hindiaudio #hindiradio

In their April episode, hosts Hannah and Carly have plenty to chat about! They discuss the challenges of teaching from home, as well as some unexpected positives. Hannah shares some learning from home tips, easy for any caretaker to implement. Hannah also shares some other podcasts to check out, and of course her monthly article.   Don’t forget to write a review in Apple podcasts, and send email to countmeinpodcast@gmail.com! Follow us on instagram @countmeinpodcast, and rate on iTunes! Carly: @CarlyFayedance Hannah: @hannahmae92 Producer Corey: @CoreyJennings     Article link: Uncover & Unleash Students’ Creative Potential Podcasts to check out All Things Montessori Armchair Expert: Armchair Expert with Jessica Lahey Armchair Expert with Wendy Mogel

I love a good parenting controversy. And the topic of how (or if) to give kids money is a big one. There are two main sides to this debate: allowance vs. commission. In the allowance model, kids are paid a set weekly or monthly rate, independent of chores or other qualifications. The second approach is a commission system, a work-for-pay system wherein kids are paid for doing chores and making other contributions to the family. And then, of course, there’s a third option: not giving kids money at all. Links from this episode: How Lisa Teaches Kids About Money How Sarah Teaches Kids About Money 3 Reasons I Don't Pay My Kids an Allowance, by Amanda Hamilton Roos Allowance by Lisa Hoelzer, Betterwayparenting.net   Smart Money, Smart Kids, by Dave and Rachel Ramsey  The Entitlement Trap, by Linda and Richard Eyre The Opposite of Spoiled, by Ron Lieber   The Blessing of a B-, by Wendy Mogel.   

Is there a right way to let kids struggle and fail? How do you raise resilient children? And most important, when should you help out, and when should you chill out? We ask Dr. Wendy Mogel, author of The Blessing of a Skinned Knee to advise a Portland, Oregon couple who worry about their son getting wet in a squirt gun fight. If you enjoyed this episode, please subscribe to How To With Charles Duhigg, wherever you listen to podcasts. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Is there a right way to let kids struggle and fail? How do you raise resilient children? And most important, when should you help out, and when should you chill out? We ask Dr. Wendy Mogel, author of The Blessing of a Skinned Knee to advise a Portland, Oregon couple who worry about their son getting wet in a squirt gun fight. Slate Plus members get bonus segments and ad-free podcast feeds. Sign up now. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Is there a right way to let kids struggle and fail? How do you raise resilient children? And most important, when should you help out, and when should you chill out? In this episode of How To! we ask Dr. Wendy Mogel, author of The Blessing of a Skinned Knee to advise a Portland, Oregon couple who worry about their son getting wet in a squirt gun fight. Slate Plus members get bonus segments and ad-free podcast feeds. Sign up now. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Are you ever mid-conversation with your teen when they suddenly ask you to stop yelling at them? Since when is what you're doing considered yelling? It's more complicated than you think. Wendy Mogel, author of "Voice Lessons for Parents," explains. Get Wendy's book on Amazon or wherever you get your books. 

In this episode you will hear: (3:36) In this week’s news, an article from the Wall Street Journal, “Colleges Mine Data on their Applicants” by Douglas Belkin. Some colleges are tracking the online activity of prospective students to evaluate their demonstrated interest in the schools. From how fast they open their emails, if they click any links, to how long they spend reading the content. Belkin shares how schools, such as Seton Hall University in NJ, have a scoring system based on a student’s online activity. Mark and Anika have a robust discussion about whether this is appropriate. They also discuss why there is so much blowback to this practice but they also converse about why colleges are reluctant to not employ some of these tactics to help them bring in their admitted class. (25:52) We are in Chapter 77 of 171 Answers and Mark shares how admission offices evaluate applicants who are transferring from another college. It is important to understand the wide range of approaches that colleges use, both from their admission processes, their admission rates and their dates and deadlines. Mark and Anika discuss this and so much more including what factors are often most important in the evaluation. We also discuss why using the Common Data Set is important for transfers. (38:27) This week’s question is from a listener who wants to know how colleges view applicants that graduate a year early from high school. We discuss how colleges perceive these applicants. Are they hurt in the college process or the college transition? (42:37) Mark continues his interview with Admissions Dean Greg Roberts as they transition into “Understanding the University of Virginia”. Some of the things Greg discusses in this interview include: · Why a large number of public schools do not do a holistic admissions review · How the Varsity Blues scandal is impacting admissions · The different vision that politicians have about what the role of public education should be. (51:44) Mark’s recommended resource of the week is the book, The Blessing of a Skinned Knee, Using Timeless Teachings to Raise Self-Reliant Children by Dr. Wendy Mogel   Don’t forget to send your questions related to any and every facet of the college process to   Every episode of Your College-Bound Kid will align with a chapter from the book 171 Answers to the Most-Asked College Admission Questions. To get a copy visit  and if you want to see what future episodes will cover just click the red button “See exactly what 171 Answers covers.  

Solitude is a precious commodity for moms, especially when the kids are little. Sometimes entire weeks go by without a minute alone. This is the time of life when going grocery shopping alone or even going to the dentist can feel like a big vacation. Yet setting aside some time and space for yourself is an important way to recharge and help you feel like a real person. Over the years, I’ve figured out several strategies for sneaking in some islands of precious time and space for myself, even if it’s just a few minutes here and there. In this episode, I split them up into two categories—Mom time and Mom space—with six ideas apiece. Links from this episode: Extraordinary Moms Podcast, episode 213: Self-Date Night 3 in 30 Podcast, Episode 29: Making the Most of Everyday Moments to Connect with Our Kids The Miracle Morning, by Hal Elrod   Full text: Seven years ago, my husband and I went to Costa Rica with his family and left our then three children (ages 5, 3, and 1), with my parents. This was the first time we'd been on a trip without our kids, and it felt both luxurious and strange to get on a plane without them. Navigating the airport was a breeze, and I actually read a book on the plane! When we arrived at our vacation rental, we were amazed. We could see the ocean from the pool patio. Monkeys were just hanging out in the tropical trees and iguanas sauntered across the lawn. It was paradise. And I was a crazy person.  Instead of relaxing and enjoying the view or heading to explore the beach, I was running around to all the bedrooms, taking it upon myself to help figure out where everyone should sleep, especially the family that had brought their young son. I had this nagging worry that no one had started to cook the dry beans that we had bought for dinner— and you know how long beans take to cook!! I ran to start simmering the beans, and then set about unpacking and settling into my room. I was in full-on-mom mode, even though no one there needed to be mothered—especially not by me. And then I burned the beans.  Appalled and embarrassed that I had burned dinner, I retreated to my bedroom for a little navel gazing. When had I become this person? Was I even capable of enjoying this amazing vacation? Had motherhood turned me into a micro-managing freak? Happily, a good night's sleep and a little time at the beach transformed me from Mom with a capital M into a real person. In a few more days, I was not only a person, I was Whitney. I laughed out loud at my book ("Good Omens" by Terri Pratchett and Neil Gaiman), quoting annoyingly from it to anyone in the vicinity. I woke up early to read my scriptures and write in my journal by the pool. I hiked, explored, and frolicked in the waves.  And then came the most astonishing moment of the trip. Everyone else walked down to the beach and I stayed behind to grab my beach gear. Soon I looked around me and realized I was alone. Alone! I felt so weird and wonderful, and that feeling made me realize how long it had been since I was completely alone, with no obligation to anyone else. My family at the beach was going to have fun whether I was there or not. So I decided not to go. I grabbed my book and hopped on a pool float. I read until I got hot, jumped into the pool, and even practiced my diving because no one was there to judge. I sang out loud. I read and wrote some more. It was one of the best moments of my life, a moment in which I felt completely myself. It was like I was on my own little island—alone. That day helped me realize how rare and wonderful solitude can be for moms, especially in those early years of motherhood, before any of your kids are in school and before any of them are old enough to babysit. In her book, “All Joy and No Fun” (perhaps the best title ever written about parenthood) Jennifer Senior referred to this time of parenthood as “The Bunker Years.” You spend a lot of time at home, yes, because of naps and such, but even when you’re out and about, you’re out and about with kids, so the trips are usually short and hectic. Not only that, but for much of the time, you don’t even have your body to yourself, between breastfeeding and pregnancy. This subset of the Bunker Years is what I call the Body-Sharing Years. Someone is always touching you. The intensity of the Bunker Years may be a bit more acute for moms who don’t have another job elsewhere, but even for moms that do, they’re usually around people all day at work and then around people at home after work. Sometimes entire weeks go by without a minute alone. This is the time of life when going grocery shopping alone or even going to the dentist can feel like a big vacation. I’m sure I’m not the only mom who identified with Flynn Rider on Tangled when he sang his dream: “On an island that I own, tanned and rested and alone, surrounded by enormous piles of money.” I’m also pretty sure I’m not the only mom who makes Disney-movie references even when talking to other adults. The other fantasy I think many moms share is that fleeting idea, when you find yourself actually alone in a car: “What if I just kept driving…” Of course with no real intentions of doing so. Jessica Dahlquist admitted on a podcast episode that that she once drove by a hospital and thought, “If only I could have a little something wrong so I could just go in there and rest.” The crazy part is, I bet most of you who are listening can relate. A word about mom guilt here. It’s OK to feel a little desperate for some time to yourself. And it’s OK to actually schedule in that alone time. It may feel selfish or ungrateful to take time for yourself when there’s so much on your to-do list and so many people on your to-be-with list. But in my experience with moms, especially moms of young kids, it’s rare to find a mom who takes too much time for herself. If the balance starts to tip that direction, you’ll feel it, and you can scale back. I am two years past the bunker years, and I’ll tell you, it’s pretty great. Once my oldest son was old enough to watch the others I could leave them with him to go shopping, run errands, or even just go on a bike ride. But there are still times—ahem, Summer Break—when it’s hard for Momma to get a little space. Over the years, I’ve figured out several strategies for sneaking in some islands of precious time and space for myself, even if it’s just a few minutes here and there. I’m going to split them up into two categories—Mom time and Mom space—with six ideas apiece. Mom Time 1. Plan a weekly Mom date. One of my favorite strategies comes from one of my favorite podcasters, Jessica Dahlquist, of Extraordinary Moms. In episode 213, she talks about how she goes on a weekly self-date night. This was actually a solution her husband came up with, when she was talking about how she just needed some time alone. He said, “Why don’t you just go on a date night by yourself every Thursday night.” He puts the kids to bed while she goes out to do whatever she feels like doing that night, whether it’s shopping without kids, going to a movie, getting some good food, or just going on a walk. So simple, yet so smart. And so refreshing. 2. Designate a Mom weekend. Weekends are supposed to be a break to recharge from the stress of the week. Not so much for moms. Several years ago I found myself feeling resentful about weekends. My husband and kids wanted to use the weekend to recharge and relax from a busy week of school and work. But someone still has to do the work of feeding and cleaning up, etc. And with everyone home, that work multiplies. That meant the weekend was actually my busiest time of the week. I could have laid down the law and insisted that we all split the work, or that we spend every Saturday doing chores together. But I believe in weekends! I wanted them to enjoy their days off. I especially didn’t want to spend every Saturday cleaning. I wanted to be out spending time and going on adventures together. Finally I found a solution. I needed a weekend too, and the actual weekend was not my time. I started picking one day a week, usually a Wednesday just to break things up, and I designated that day as my personal weekend. Now I never miss it. Most of what makes a day a weekend is a mindset. I just kind of take it easy on my weekend, fixing slacker meals or serving leftovers, taking time to read, exercise, hike, or whatever else I feel like doing. Sometimes I get a babysitter, other times I just involve whichever children aren’t in school in my leisurely day. And I usually let them watch a bit more tv than usual. The best result of this change in routine is that I’m no longer resentful of actual weekends. Now that I have my own, I’m eager to help the rest of my family really enjoy theirs. If you have another job in addition to being a mom and can’t pick a weekday, you could split the weekend up or just designate a set amount of time over the weekend for yourself. Karlee Rehrer, a mom and dental hygienist, takes a two-hour mom weekend every Sunday afternoon. Her kids and husband know that this is her time and they entertain each other. She usually just spends the time in her room, napping, reading—whatever she wants to do. 3. Go for an occasional night away. To take alone time a step further, if you can swing it, treat yourself to an occasional night away—even once a year—all by yourself. Often we think of planning a getaway with our spouses, but it can be even easier to figure out a night by yourself, because you don’t have to find a babysitter. And sometimes it’s just what you need. This doesn’t have to be expensive or elaborate. You could get creative here—maybe you just ask a good friend if you can housesit for a night while they’re on vacation. But just a night or two where you don’t have to put anyone to bed, make food for anyone else, and you can sleep uninterrupted for as long as you want can be priceless. A great example of a mom who did this is for a while, April Perry, founder of Power of Moms and Learn, Do, Become, got a hotel room for herself one night a month so she could make the time to write a book about her mother, who had Alzheimer’s Disease. She would then read chapters of that book to her mother and father each Thursday when she went to visit them. Because of those weekends away, she was able to finish her beautiful book, Thursdays with Zoe. She talks about this book on Episode 29 of the 3 in 30 Podcast. 4. Get a babysitter. I don’t know why, but with my first few babies, I thought I could only justify getting a babysitter if I needed one—if I had an important appointment that I couldn’t bring them to or if I was going on a date with my husband. But I’m giving you permission right now to get a babysitter even if you just want to go throw rocks in a lake by yourself for an hour. This doesn’t have to be expensive. Most of my babysitting, especially on weekdays when teenagers are in school, comes in the form of babysitting swaps. I was part of an official babysitting co-op for a while, but usually I just find a friend or two whose kids are compatible with mine and we set up a swapping system. This past year, my friend and I alternated Thursday afternoons. I’m also a strong believer in the power of threes—teaming up with two other friends for a babysitting swap, so you get two-out-of three babysitting sessions free. 5. Embrace the morning—or night. This next idea doesn’t really apply to moms with teensy ones. When you have little babies, you just grab every bit of sleep you can. I definitely wasn’t savoring any sunrises during the Bunker Years. But, incredibly, those baby years do pass, and one day you wake up and realize you just had a good night’s sleep. This is when you can start claiming part of each day as your own. For me, it’s the morning. I can vividly remember a time in high school when I decided I wanted to be a morning person. I started waking up early on my own and enjoying some time to myself as I got ready for the day. As the oldest of five myself, alone time was rare then too. I still love waking up before everyone else and having that time to myself to relax, be alone, and prepare myself for the day ahead. It’s also when I do my best writing. Last year, I read the book Miracle Morning, by Hal Elrod, which gives a great blueprint for starting your day with a rejuvenating morning. He uses the acronym SAVERS to guide his morning routine: S—Silence A—Affirmations V—Visualization E—Exercise R—Reading S—Scribing On the other hand, you can gain a lot of freedom by being strict about bedtime and designating a specific time of night as “adult time.” Notice how I say this as if it’s a simple thing. To me it is not. Perhaps it’s because I wake up so darn early, usually around 5 a.m., but am not very good at firm bedtime boundaries. It tends to drag on and on at my house. But I do know moms who are really good at getting their kids to bed early and consistently. My friend Rachel Beckstead’s kids go to bed by 7:00, and they know not to mess with adult time. Even if they’re still awake, they stay in their rooms. This gives Rachel the whole evening to spend some time with her husband and by herself as well. For lots of moms, this is their best time to carve out some alone time. 6. Capitalize on nap time/quiet time. Nap time is a naturally occurring break or two in your day when you have young kids. It’s easy to get in the habit of scurrying around during this time, trying to get work done that is difficult to do when kids are awake. I definitely fell into this trap for a long time. I’d work so hard during nap time that I was exhausted when the babies woke up. But then, a few babies in, I realized that I could use this time to recharge too—either to catch up on sleep, just relax and breathe for a minute, or even sit and read a book. Some moms are really good at enforcing “quiet time” for their kids even after they’re done taking naps—a great way to prolong this time for everyone to recharge. Mom Space 1. The Shower The shower is a magical place where a mom can be alone with enough white noise to drown out most of the other noise in the house. I have gotten some of my greatest inspiration in the shower. I once wrote a poem about how this tiny shower cell was actually the most liberating space in my house. I have no idea where that poem went, but it was a masterpiece. I wrote it in the shower. Granted, there are some times in a mom’s life where you really can’t take a shower without a baby seat in the bathroom with you. Often this means an entire shower with a screaming or whining child. That certainly doesn’t count as alone time. But once your child is past that baby stage, the shower or even a nice soak in the bath can be a great place for a quick dose of solitude. I know it might not be popular with some, but I’ve found that the only way to keep my small children from walking in and out of the bathroom at will while I’m taking a shower is to put on a show for the duration of the shower, and usually while I’m getting ready too. I do not feel guilty about this. I often use the time while I’m getting ready to catch up on some podcasts or audiobooks. 2. The Table I believe in sharing family meals. But there are three a day. You can afford to have at least one to yourself. Breakfast and lunch may be the best opportunities, because they’re usually less formal than the family dinner. Sometimes I eat before the kids eat, sometimes after, but never while they’re eating, because then I would surely be interrupted. When the weather’s nice, I love a good breakfast alone on my back deck to just enjoy the quiet, sit still, and enjoy the view. Julie Cornwell uses her private breakfast time to catch up on reading and personal study. 3. Your Room Whether it’s your bedroom, a home office, or even just a closet, designate a retreat for yourself in your home where you can be alone and find peace, even if it’s for a few minutes at a time. In one of my favorite parenting books of all time, “The Blessing of a Skinned Knee,” Wendy Mogel advises that you set boundaries for your kids about respecting your space, particularly your bedroom. Teach them to knock before they enter, and that your room is not a place to leave their toys, books, or other possessions. Crystal Evans is a mom and school teacher. She retreats to her room for 15 minutes right after work each day for a quick stretch of downtime before she faces a busy evening with her children. She explained to them that she needs them to respect this time, but then for the rest of the night, she’s theirs. 4. The Car Another place you can be alone is in the car. I remember when I first got my driver’s license and drove in a car all by myself. It was an exhilerating feeling. I remember driving to and from work singing as loudly and dramatically as I could. Again with the singing. Obviously, when you have young kids you’re rarely alone in a car, and, also obviously, you can’t just drive off and leave them. But I have used the car as a very brief escape when I had a super colicky baby who wouldn’t stop screaming no matter what I tried. I made sure the baby was safe in his crib and I just went out and sat in the car in the garage just to give my ears a brief respite. A few minutes was enough time to regroup, calm myself, and go back inside to keep trying. My mom used to linger alone in the car in our driveway with the doors shut after we all scrambled out. I used to think she was so weird. But of course I totally do that now. When my kids were younger, I would always be the one to volunteer to pick people up from the airport, just to have that drive to myself. And a work commute can be a great time to collect yourself before heading home to the kids. My teenager and I were arguing one night and it was clear we needed to table the discussion, get some sleep, and resume the conversation when we were both rested and more sane. So I said goodnight and hopped in the car. I drove around in silence for a while, letting myself cool down, and then realized I was hungry. I pulled into the Wendy’s drive-through at 10:00 pm. The window guy took a while to recognize that I was there and take my order, and he apologized profusely. I just said, “Who am I to judge. I’m the one at a Wendy’s drivethrough in my pajamas at 10:00.” To make myself sound even more pathetic, I’ve also had many a good cry in a car in a deserted parking lot. 5. Your Yard One of my favorite places to be alone is just outside at my own home. When I lived in a house with a lawn larger than a postage stamp, I used to love to mow it. The noise of the mower blocked everything else out, and I was alone with my thoughts. I wrote some great essays while mowing. I also love weeding. It’s such a mindless activity. You can just sit and think and pull one satisfying weed after another. Audra Elkington loves to start her day on her front porch for just 5-10 minutes, soaking in the sun, listening to birds chirp, and meditating. 6. A Path Even if you’re pushing a stroller, going on a walk or jog can feel like alone time. The kids enjoy it too, and getting out together is so therapeutic. This was a little tricky in the winter for the nine years I lived in Minnesota, but luckily everything in our city was connected by underground tunnels, so we’d just drive downtown and walk through the burrows. Any kind of path can be a great place to get some space. I remember a particularly rough night with five kids between 1 and 10. As soon as my husband walked in the door I handed him the baby, grabbed my running shoes, and just ran out my pent-up aggression. My favorite kind of alone time is cycling. I got a road bike two years ago, and I love riding for miles and miles. I never bring headphones—I just think and think. I write essays in my head and make up songs to the rhythm of my pedaling. Whatever your own unique mom life looks like, find those little islands of time and space to sneak in a bit of alone time to practice being yourself. There's nothing like motherhood to teach you just how beautiful solitude can be. 

It’s easy for most parents to explain what’s wrong with how our kids speak to us: the snark, sarcasm, and eye-rolling are all things we could use a lot less of.  But could the way we talk to our kids use a little fine-tuning as well?  Dr. Wendy Mogel’s latest book, Voice Lessons for Parents: What to Say, How to Say It, and When To Listen, is just out in paperback. In this episode, Dr. Wendy Mogel tells us how to bridge the ever-more-complicated communication gap between parents and children, no matter what age our kids are. Over the last two years we've quoted Dr. Mogel more than any other parenting expert, and no surprise- this interview is full of "aha moments" and great ideas. You can read and download the full transcript here. And if you still need a little convincing that we should be focusing on the faults with our own parental communication, rather than the shortcomings of our children’s techniques, consider this quote from another classic of parenting advice, How to Talk So Kids Will Listen and Listen So Kids Will Talk: "Rather than blaming your kids for all your parenting grief, you can improve communication with them by making a few changes to the way you speak to them and set the tone of a situation. Listening, sharing feelings, and respecting your kids will make your job as a parent far easier.” Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

A simple holiday trip to Grandma’s house teaches us a lot about delegating and the balance between micromanaging and full autonomy in this episode. Why is that important for business?   There are two traps at either end of managing people and delegating responsibility that can both be problematic: 1. Not making space for the story of them to evolve and micromanaging them, or; 2. Giving them full autonomy, perhaps before they are ready or developed for that responsibility.   So how do navigate this fine line? Often, a great first place to look are at the stakes of the project. Look for low and medium stakes issues to delegate – areas that you can leave room for some autonomy, and even some failure, because they can be repaired or fixed if a problem occurs.  Like in parenting, if you want your team to be able to handle disappointment or frustration, you have to let them be disappointed or frustrated. If you want to delegate, you must first let people have low stakes failures and allow them to develop. You have to let employees have space to learn by doing, but it doesn’t have to be a binary choice between micromanagement and hands off.  The projects or tasks that you delegate should also help them appreciate the impact of mistakes and have an insight into the larger pictures. Mindless busy work can be delegated, but it doesn’t help them develop a sense of responsibility that tasks that are clearly tied to the next step will.  Besides the stakes, you want to consider the impact of the project you want to delegate – who will a failure impact? If it’s important customers, that is something you want to observe more carefully.  At some point, you also have to consider that well-delegated tasks are a good litmus test for assessing someone’s strengths and suitability. It is important as a manager to recognize what is important to the staff member, and recognize the skill sets they have and where they work well. They might not be suited for the tasks you want to delegate.  The best way to move into delegation is to make sure people can change the sentiment of “you’re right” to the sentiment of “that’s right”. Pay attention to what part of delegation you get stuck on, and what part they can help you with from the other side. Notice what role the story you have of that person plays into your delegation experience.  And lastly, if you delegate a lot, and it always fails, maybe the problem is you.    Resource mentioned The Blessing of a Skinned Knee, Wendy Mogel, PhD https://www.wendymogel.com/books/item/the_blessing_of_a_skinned_knee The Price of Privilege, Madeline Levine, PhD https://madelinelevine.com/the-price-of-privilege/   What story do you want to tell? So, that's our story... now, we want to hear yours! Pull up a chair and join the conversation in our Facebook Group: bit.ly/shmsgroup OR...  Shoot us an email: talktous@soheresmystory.com Connect with @SHMSpodcast on Twitter: https://twitter.com/shmspodcast  Text the word STORY to 345345 to get access to bonus content and weekly episode delivery.   Want to support us? Love this podcast? Please tell your friends, post about us, or take moment to review us & subscribe on iTunes, Stitcher, or wherever you listen to the podcast!    

Wendy Mogel, author of Voice Lessons for Parents. @drwendymogel Topic: What to say, how to say it, and when to listen. Issues: How your vocal style affects your parenting effectiveness; how a shift in that style can lead to children who are calmer, listen more attentively, and communicate with more warmth, respect, and sincerity; best […] The post What to Say, How to Say It, and When to Listen appeared first on Mr. Dad.

In Episode 52, Sara Kuljis and I chat about ways to help our kids process experiences. The ideas work for post-summer camp debriefing but also for our kids' other adventures and experiences. Sara is a 20-year veteran camp director and parenting trainer who has great insights and ideas about parenting and counseling kids. Sara, with her husband Steve, owns and directs Yosemite Sierra Summer Camp, a Christian adventure camp for children ages 8 to 16 years old founded 45 years ago by Sara's parents Jim and Marna Slevcove. Together, the Kuljises also direct Emerald Cove Day Camp in San Juan Capistrano, a day camp that serves children from kindergarten through 4th grade. 9 Ways to Help Kids Process Experiences Plan time to rest/process. Listen to their stories. Look through photos together. Ask thoughtful questions: • What did you enjoy/love? • What was challenging? • When (not if!) you do it again, what will you do differently? Avoid "interviewing for pain" (Wendy Mogel). Bring home a ritual or tradition: • Flower Sundays • WOWs • Goodnight Song Continue with an interest that's been sparked (archery, guitar, etc.). Create a remembrance. Encourage kids to stay in touch with new friends. Books We Talked About Off the Clock, Laura Vanderkam Blessing of a Skinned Knee, Wendy Mogel             Blessing of a B-, Wendy Mogel Like listening to Sara and Audrey chat? Here are our other podcast episodes! https://sunshine-parenting.com/2019/04/ep-85-grit-is-grown-outside-the-comfort-zone-pegtalk/ Ep. 3: Raising Resilient, Independent Kids Ep. 7: Family Pace & Space Ep. 23: Peaceful Mornings Ep. 28:  Focusing on Our Kids' Strengths Ep. 37: How to Get Ready for Overnight Summer Camp Ep. 39: How to Handle Your Camper's Homesickness Ep. 57: The Importance of Adult Friendships Ep. 63: Growing Gratitude Ep. 77: Comparison is the Thief of (Parenting) Joy Ep. 82: Sibling Conflict, Pt. 1 Ep. 86: Conflict Resolution Skills for Siblings (and Everyone Else!)

We reflect on what we would tell our 20, 25, and 30 year old selves. From prioritizing community, to no longer "suffocating from the shoulds," and extending grace to ourselves for the journey we're on, this is a discussion to which we hope many of you can connect and relate. SHOW NOTES FOR EPISODE #5: In the first part of the show, we discuss the INCREDIBLE dinner we had at The Populist in Denver.  This is the Salt & Vinegar popcorn we mention. SO STINKING good.  A pic of us with our dear friend and future Bonus Mom, Brit. We mention her in the show for being a BOSS and such a huge help to us throughout this podcast endeavor. Oh, and this is the gorgeous patio/ivy wall we reference- isn't she a beaut?! Just the casual/lovely display of fare you can expect at The Populist   Mere has been digging the Head to Heart Podcast with Christa and Luke Gifford (@spirituallysexy / @masterheart.luke / @headtoheartpodcast on Instagram). It’s a podcast detailing their faith and marital journey (and how they came back stronger than ever after infidelity). The podcast episode Mere references is Episode 11 (she thinks…) Overall, she finds Head to Heart a really interesting listen with authentic (sometimes downright ballsy) conversation between this married duo. Mere learned the term 'deconstruction' through Jonathan Martin, host of the Son Of A Preacher Man podcast and someone who has been a big voice of healing for Mere. Side note: Jonathan also creates daily meditations which you can sign up for here. Nic mentions the Liturgist podcastin reference to deconstruction of faith. Nic has found the topics and conversations on this podcast particularly interesting, thoughtful, and insightful during her own deconstruction journey.  What Nic is digging: Amazon Smile! If you order through this URL when you place a qualifying purchase, you can benefit a charity of your choice! WHAT A GREAT WAY TO SHOP AND GIVE BACK AT THE EXACT SAME TIME! Now THERE'S a reason to smile. #sorry #hadto  Also, any other HP lovers in the house?! Even after living with Nicole for four years, Mere JUST learned that Nicole reads all of the Harry Potter books every fall. We may need to do an episode on Harry Potter to honor Nic and her move to London..... Ok. Moving right along. Remember the gal who told her client her kids "aren't that cute" ? This is her! Wendy Mogel, parenting expert and guest on the Armchair Expert podcast (hosted by Dax Shepherd). She looks too gentle to have told someone her kids weren't cute. Oh to live in such freedom...   Lastly, Mere recommends this restaurateur, yogi, business badass, and down-to-earth British gal, Ella Woodward, with whom Nic ABSOLUTELY MUST become bffs when she moves to London. I (Mere) act like I know the woman when really I'm just a BIG FAN. Her recipes and cookbooks and other endeavors are GORGEOUS people. Check this gem of a human out.      We hope you've enjoyed this discussion as much as we have. And we're curious: What would you tell your 20, 25, or 30 year old self? Give us your thoughts on Instagram or shoot us an email. We absolutely LOVE HEARING FROM YOU.  Ok. We're done yelling. We adore you, RFB tribe. Catch you next time! -Nic & Mere Oh, and if you're not yet subscribed to the Room For Both podcast (and you're here on a mobile device) you can subscribe below to stay in-the-know about future episode releases. And, if you've yet to rate/review the podcast on iTunes, can you please take a minute to hop over there and leave your thoughts? It helps so much for a baby podcast like ours and we'd love the feedback!

Welcome to Episode 4 of Mom’s Wine Out! Nic and Lex are putting on their best 80’s power suits on to discuss how they became working mothers, or better yet, workers that became mothers. So pour yourself a nice glass of your favorite drink and “clock-in” for another amazing episode. Cheers! 1:45 Lex’s highs and lows involve being a broke @$$ and signs from the universe. 5:25 Shout-out to Big Daddy for his super annoying weight loss [que the eye roll.] 6:23 Nic shares a double high and the lows of parenthood. 8:50 The wine gets to Nic’s head as she praises the Armchair “Commander” podcast…which doesn’t exist? Instead, much love and admiration goes to the “Armchair Expert Podcast” with Dax Shepard. Check out his first Experts on Expert episode with Child Psychologist, Dr. Wendy Mogel. 10:30 The ladies sing their praises for making it to episode five and discuss the topic of the week. 11:43 Nic gives a bit of her background, growing up with three hard-working parents.

First we’re setting aside our own hopes and dreams to have (and raise) our kids. Then we’re relentlessly mocked (perhaps correctly) for being over-invested in the fourth-grade luau. Are we living through our kids? And how do we stop?  Psychologists have long said that mothers transfer our own unfulfilled ambition onto our children. “Symbolic self-completion theory” suggests that we look to our children as symbols of ourselves, and transfer our ambitions to them— which is why we’re not jealous when they get the big part in the school play; we’re a little too thrilled. Sing out Louise! But as psychologist Wendy Mogel reminds us, our children are not our masterpieces , and pushing them towards our own notions of greatness prevents them from becoming the humans they are meant to be. In this episode we discuss the pitfalls of “achievement by proxy distortion” and how to take a step back if you find yourself a little too enmeshed. Our favorite book on this topic is Leo the Late Bloomer by Robert Kraus, the story of a tiger cub who just isn’t getting it and his dad who is trying to not freak out. Recommended for kids, really recommended for parents. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Wendy Mogel, Ph.D., talks with Matt and his wife, Erin, about Voice Lessons for Parents: What to Say, How to Say It, and When to Listen.

In this inaugural episode of Experts on Expert, Dax speaks to author and child psychologist, Dr. Wendy Mogel about human patterns of behavior, the impact of social media on the family and the importance of free-reign grandparenting. Wendy gives advice on how to speak to children and Dax asks for reassurance on his parenting strategy. The two of them breakdown the moral dilemma of behavioral diagnoses, the role of fear and Wendy discusses a study that uncovered the one thing every child wishes they could tell their parents. Dr. Wendy Mogel is a practicing clinical psychologist in Los Angeles, New York Times bestselling author and international public speaker.

In this inaugural episode of Experts on Expert, the Armchair Expert speaks to author and child psychologist, Dr. Wendy Mogel about human patterns of behavior, the impact of social media on the family and the importance of free-reign grandparenting. Wendy gives advice on how to speak to children and Dax asks for reassurance on his parenting strategy. The two of them breakdown the moral dilemma of behavioral diagnoses, the role of fear and Wendy discusses a study that uncovered the one thing every child wishes they could tell their parents. Dr. Wendy Mogel is a practicing clinical psychologist in Los Angeles, New York Times bestselling author and international public speaker.

Brea and Mallory talk about reading with children, and interview author and podcaster Theresa Thorn. Use the hashtag #ReadingGlasses to participate in online discussion! Email us at readingglassespodcast at gmail dot com!   Reading Glasses Tote Bags   Links - iPhone hack - On iPhones, go to settings > general > accessibility > display accommodations > color filters > Grayscale Theresa Thorn - One Bad Mother https://twitter.com/theresathorn Theresa's Book   Reading Glasses Transcriptions on Gretta   Reading Glasses Facebook Group   Reading Glasses Goodreads Group Apex Magazine Page Advice Article   Amazon Wish List   Books Mentioned -   Priestdaddy by Patricia Lockwood   The Last Picture Show by Larry McMurtry The Eleventh Hour by Graeme Base Lady Oracle by Margaret Atwood Lost At School by Ross W. Greene   Far from the Tree by Andrew Solomon Who Needs Donuts? By Mark Alan Stamaty   What Makes a Baby by Corey Silverberg   Radiant Child: The Story of Young Artist Jean-Michel Basquiat by Javaka Steptoe  And Baby Makes Three by  John M. Gottman, Julie Schwartz Gottman   The Blessing of a Skinned Knee by Wendy Mogel  

Are your child’s most annoying traits disconcertingly familiar, because they are also your own? And are those qualities- anxiety, competitiveness, impatience, even hatred of loud chewing- baked in the cake? Or have our children learned how to be impossible simply by living with us?  Ellie Grossman says when our kids are driving us nuts, it’s always best to look within for answers: The trick is to find our child’s greatest strength hidden inside his or her worst quality. The first step is to look at ourselves in the mirror. Where do you think our child’s mishegas comes from in the first place? Keeping this in mind, we also love Wendy Mogel’s writing about the “yetser hara,” that part of all children’s personalities that is both the source of all parental exasperation and the essential spark of our children’s greatness. Read more here: Emily Bazelon for The New York Times: So The Torah is a Parenting Guide? Wendy Mogel, The Blessing of a Skinned Knee: Using Timeless Teachings to Raise Self-Reliant Children Special thanks to our listener Michelle for suggesting this topic! Do you have an idea for an upcoming episode? Leave us a comment below, send us an email, or click the Speakpipe on the right-hand edge of our website to leave us a voice message. This week’s episode is brought to you by Barkbox. Barkbox is a monthly surprise of dog toys, treats and goodies. Amy’s kids absolutely loved helping Marshmallow choose among the many delights in her “Knights of the Hound Table” themed shipment. What Fresh Hell listeners can get a free Barkbox when signing up for a 6 or 12-month plan (and support our podcast!) by using our special code: barkbox.com/laughing.       Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

A teaching story about Torah study from Wendy Mogel’s book “The Blessing of a Skinned Knee” is a terrific reminder that a good example is more compelling than good advice. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

A blueprint for parents who want to raise confident, resilient children. Jessica Lahey is an educator, writer, and speaker. And she’s the author of the New York Times bestselling book “The Gift of Failure: How the Best Parents Learn to Let Go So Their Children Can Succeed.” Reading from her website about the book it says, “In the tradition of Paul Tough’s book How Children Succeed and Wendy Mogel’s The Blessing of a Skinned Knee, this groundbreaking manifesto focuses on the critical school years when parents must learn to allow their children to experience the disappointment and frustration that occur from life’s inevitable problems so that they can grow up to be successful, resilient, and self-reliant adults.” We all want those things for our children. And the more you teach something, the better you become at it so you just may become more successful, resilient and self-reliant yourself. If you don’t have time to listen to the entire episode or if you hear something that you like but don’t have time to write it down, be sure to grab your free copy of the Action Plan from this episode-- as well as get access to action plans from EVERY episode-- at JimHarshawJr.com/Action. Let's connect:  Website | Facebook | Twitter About Your Host Jim Harshaw My name is Jim Harshaw. And I know where you’re at. You’re working hard and qualified for what you do but you aren’t getting what you want. You have plans on getting to the C-suite or launching a business but ultimate success seems as far away today as ever. You’re at the right place because you can get there from here.  And I can help.  Who I Am I’m a speaker, coach, and former Division I All-American wrestler that helps motivated former athletes reach their full potential by getting clarity on what they really want and taking aggressive action to lead their ideal life not just despite their prior failures but because of them. I’m a husband and father of four. And I’m a serial entrepreneur. I’ve launched multiple successful businesses as well as the obligatory failed one. I’ve been the executive director of a non-profit and have raised millions of dollars. I’ve worked in sales. I’ve even been a Division I head coach. While I was born in a blue-collar home I have spent my life surrounded by Olympians, CEO’s and millionaires. Jim Rohn said, “You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.” I’ve been lucky. I’ve learned the habits of successful people and guess what. You’re just like them. I know because I know your type. You’re programmed for hard work, which is a prerequisite for success, but you’ve never been shown how to use what you know to create the life you want with the tools you have. I will show you how. Why You are Here You've worked hard to achieve greatness. You’ve set goals and maybe even set records. You’ve definitely failed and you’ve at some point found yourself questioning if you were on the right track. You need to understand this: You are far more prepared to succeed than those who’ve not tried, competed, struggled and overcome like you have. That’s the value of your education as someone who aims high. You are prepared to be as successful as your wildest dreams will allow. Here I will teach you, with the help of brilliant minds that have been shaped by failure, struggle, and adversity, to be who you want to be. I sense that you want this because you have read this far. To take the next step today, click here. FOLLOW JIM Website | Facebook | Twitter