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Special occasions, whether they're weddings, birthdays, holiday gatherings, or family reunions can be joyful, memorable, and deeply meaningful. But for parents of children who are highly sensitive, anxious, or strong-willed “Gladiators,” these events can also bring big challenges.In this episode replay of Connected Parenting, Jennifer Kolari, shares 10 practical strategies to help your child (and you) navigate these moments with more ease.From preparing ahead of time and setting realistic expectations, to knowing when to step away and how to stay calm under pressure, Jennifer offers tools that will make family celebrations less stressful and more enjoyable.Let's face it, big events will never be stress-free, but with these strategies you can turn them into opportunities for connection and lasting family memories.Jennifer's Takeaways:Impact of Parental Energy on Children (02:18)Managing Event Schedules and Expectations (03:22)Consistent Parenting Across Settings (05:23)Taking Breaks and Sharing Responsibility (07:16)Leaving Before a Meltdown (09:00)Preparing Children for Events (10:28)Ensuring Proper Nutrition (11:03)Ensuring Adequate Rest (12:06)Meet Jennifer KolariJennifer Kolari is the host of the “Connected Parenting” weekly podcast and the co-host of “The Mental Health Comedy” podcast. Kolari is a frequent guest on Nationwide morning shows and podcasts in the US and Canada. Her advice can also be found in many Canadian and US magazines such as; Today's Parent, Parents Magazine and Canadian Family.Kolari's powerful parenting model is based on the neurobiology of love, teaching parents how to use compassion and empathy as powerful medicine to transform challenging behavior and build children's emotional resilience and emotional shock absorbers.Jennifer's wisdom, quick wit and down to earth style help parents navigate modern-day parenting problems, offering real-life examples as well as practical and effective tools and strategies.Her highly entertaining, inspiring workshops are shared with warmth and humour, making her a crowd-pleasing speaker with schools, medical professionals, corporations and agencies throughout North America, Europe and Asia.One of the nation's leading parenting experts, Jennifer Kolari, is a highly sought- after international speaker and the founder of Connected Parenting. A child and family therapist with a busy practice based in San Diego and Toronto, Kolari is also the author of Connected Parenting: How to Raise A Great Kid (Penguin Group USA and Penguin Canada, 2009) and You're Ruining My Life! (But Not Really): Surviving the Teenage Years with Connected Parenting (Penguin Canada, 2011).

You're listening to Burnt Toast! Today, my guest is Ash Brandin of Screen Time Strategies, also know as The Gamer Educator on Instagram. Ash is also the author of a fantastic new book, Power On: Managing Screen Time to Benefit the Whole Family. Ash joined us last year to talk about how our attitudes towards screen time can be…diet-adjacent. I asked them to come back on the podcast this week because a lot of us are heading into back-to-school mode, which in my experience can mean feelingsss about screen routines. There are A LOT of really powerful reframings in this episode that might blow your mind—and make your parenting just a little bit easier. So give this one a listen and share it with anyone in your life who's also struggling with kids and screen time.Today's episode is free but if you value this conversation, please consider supporting our work with a paid subscription. Burnt Toast is 100% reader- and listener-supported. We literally can't do this without you! PS. You can take 10 percent off Power On, or any book we talk about on the podcast, if you order it from the Burnt Toast Bookshop, along with a copy of Fat Talk! (This also applies if you've previously bought Fat Talk from them. Just use the code FATTALK at checkout.)Episode 208 TranscriptVirginiaFor anyone who missed your last episode, can you just quickly tell us who you are and what you do?AshI'm Ash Brandin. I use they/them pronouns.I am a middle school teacher by day, and then with my online presence, I help families and caregivers better understand and manage all things technology—screen time, screens. My goal is to reframe the way that we look at them as caregivers, to find a balance between freaking out about them and allowing total access. To find a way that works for us. VirginiaWe are here today to talk about your brilliant new book, which is called Power On: Managing Screen Time to Benefit the Whole Family. I can't underscore enough how much everybody needs a copy of this book. I have already turned back to it multiple times since reading it a few months ago. It just really helps ground us in so many aspects of this conversation that we don't usually have.AshI'm so glad to hear that it's helpful! If people are new to who I am, I have sort of three central tenets of the work that I do: * Screen time is a social inequity issue. * Screens can be part of our lives without being the center of our lives. * Screens and screen time should benefit whole families.Especially in the last few years, we have seen a trend toward panic around technology and screens and smartphones and social media. I think that there are many reasons to be concerned around technology and its influence, especially with kids. But what's missing in a lot of those conversations is a sense of empowerment about what families can reasonably do. When we focus solely on the fear, it ends up just putting caregivers in a place of feeling bad.VirginiaYou feel like you're getting it wrong all the time.AshShame isn't empowering. No one is like, “Well, I feel terrible about myself, so now I feel equipped to go make a change,” right?Empowerment is what's missing in so many of those conversations and other books and things that have come out, because it's way harder. It's so much harder to talk about what you can really do and reasonably control in a sustainable way. But I'm an educator, and I really firmly believe that if anyone's in this sort of advice type space, be it online or elsewhere, that they need to be trying to empower and help families instead of just capitalizing on fear.VirginiaWhat I found most powerful is that you really give us permission to say: What need is screen time meeting right now? And this includes caregivers' needs. So not just “what need is this meeting for my child,” but what need is this meeting for me? I am here recording with you right now because iPads are meeting the need of children have a day off school on a day when I need to work. We won't be interrupted unless I have to approve a screen time request, which I might in 20 minutes.I got divorced a couple years ago, and my kids get a lot more screen time now. Because they move back and forth between two homes, and each only has one adult in it. Giving myself permission to recognize that I have needs really got me through a lot of adjusting to this new rhythm of our family.AshAbsolutely. And when we're thinking about what the need is, we also need to know that it's going to change. So often in parenting, it feels like we have to come up with one set of rules and they have to work for everything in perpetuity without adjustment. That just sets us up for a sense of failure if we're like, well, I had this magical plan that someone told me was going to work, and it didn't. So I must be the problem, right? It all comes back to that “well, it's my fault” place.VirginiaWhich is screens as diet culture.AshAll over again. We're back at it. It's just not helpful. If instead, we're thinking about what is my need right now? Sometimes it's “I have to work.” And sometimes it's “my kid is sick and they just need to relax.” Sometimes it's, as you were alluding to earlier, it's we've all just had a day, right? We've been run ragged, and we just need a break, and that need is going to dictate very different things. If my kid is laid up on the couch and throwing up, then what screen time is going to be doing for them is very different than If I'm trying to work and I want them to be reasonably engaged in content and trying to maybe learn something. And that's fine. Being able to center “this is what I need right now,” or “this is what we need right now,” puts us in a place of feeling like we're making it work for us. Instead of feeling like we're always coming up against some rule that we're not going to quite live up to.VirginiaI'd love to talk about the inequity piece a little more too. As I said, going from a two parent household to a one parent household, which is still a highly privileged environment—but even just that small shift made me realize, wait a second. I think all the screen time guidance is just for typical American nuclear families. Ideally, with a stay at home parent.So can you talk about why so much of the standard guidance doesn't apply to most of our families?AshIt's not even just a stay at home parent. It's assuming that there is always at least one caregiver who is fully able to be present. Mom, default parent, is making dinner, and Dad is relaxing after work and is monitoring what the kids are doing, right? And it's one of those times where I'm like, have you met a family?VirginiaPeople are seven different places at once. It's just not that simple.AshIt's not that simple, right? It's like, have you spent five minutes in a typical household in the last 10 years? This is not how it's going, right?So the beginning of the book helps people unlearn and relearn what we may have heard around screens, including what research really does or doesn't say around screens, and this social inequity piece. Because especially since the onset of COVID, screens are filling in systemic gaps for the vast majority of families.I'm a family with two caregivers in the home. We both work, but we're both very present caregivers. So we're definitely kind of a rarity, that we're very privileged. We're both around a lot of the time. And we are still using screens to fill some of those gaps.So whether it's we don't really have a backyard, or people are in a neighborhood where they can't send their kids outside, or they don't have a park or a playground. They don't have other kids in the neighborhood, or it's not a safe climate. Or you live in an apartment and you can't have your neighbors complain for the fifth time that your kids are stomping around and being loud. Whatever it is—a lack of daycare, affordable after school care —those are all gaps. They all have to be filled. And we used to have different ways of filling those gaps, and they've slowly become less accessible or less available. So something has to fill them. What ends up often filling them is screens. And I'm not saying that that's necessarily a good thing. I'd rather live in a world in which everyone is having their needs met accessibly and equitably. But that's a much harder conversation, and is one that we don't have very much say in. We participate in that, and we might vote for certain people, but that's about all we can really do reasonably. So, in the meantime, we have to fill that in with something and so screens are often going to fill that in.Especially if you look at caregivers who have less privilege, who are maybe single caregivers, caregivers of color, people living in poverty—all of those aspects of scarcity impacts their bandwidth. Their capacity as a caregiver is less and spread thinner, and all of that takes away from a caregiver's ability to be present. And there were some really interesting studies that were done around just the way that having less capacity affects you as a caregiver.And when I saw that data, I thought, well, of course. Of course people are turning to screens because they have nothing else to give from. And when we think of it that way, it's hard to see that as some sort of personal failure, right? When we see it instead as, oh, this is out of necessity. It reframes the question as “How do I make screens work for me,” as opposed to, “I'm bad for using screens.”VirginiaRight. How do I use screen time to meet these needs and to hopefully build up my capacity so that I can be more present with my kids? I think people think if you're using a lot of screens, you're really never present. It's that stereotype of the parent on the playground staring at their phone, instead of watching the kid play. When maybe the reason we're at the playground is so my kid can play and I can answer some work emails. That doesn't mean I'm not present at other points of the day.AshOf course. You're seeing one moment. I always find that so frustrating. It just really feels like you you cannot win. If I were sitting there staring at my child's every move in the park, someone would be like, “you're being a helicopter,” right? And if I look at my phone because I'm trying to make the grocery pickup order—because I would rather my child have time at the playground than we spend our only free hour in the grocery store and having to manage a kid in the grocery store and not having fun together, right? Instead I'm placing a pickup order and they're getting to run around on the playground. Now also somehow I'm failing because I'm looking at my phone instead of my kid. But also, we want kids to have independent time, and not need constant input. It really feels like you just can't win sometimes. And being able to take a step back and really focus on what need is this meeting? And if it's ours, and if it is helping me be more present and connected, that's a win. When I make dinner in the evening, my kid is often having screen time, and I will put in an AirPod and listen to a podcast, often Burnt Toast, and that's my decompression. Because I come home straight from work and other things. I'm not getting much time to really decompress.VirginiaYou need that airlock time, where you can decompress and then be ready to be present at dinner.I'm sure I've told you this before, but I reported a piece on screen time for Parents Magazine, probably almost 10 years ago at this point, because I think my older child was three or four. And I interviewed this Harvard researcher, this older white man, and I gave him this the dinner time example. I said, I'm cooking dinner. My kid is watching Peppa Pig so that I can cook dinner, and take a breath. And then we eat dinner together. And he said, “Why don't you involve her in cooking dinner? Why don't you give her a bag of flour to play with while you cook dinner?”AshOf all the things!VirginiaAnd I said to him: Because it's 5pm on a Wednesday and who's coming to clean the flour off the ceiling?AshA bag of flour. Of all the things to go to! VirginiaHe was like, “kids love to make a happy mess in the kitchen!” I was like, well I don't love that. And it was just exactly that. My need didn't matter to him at all. He was like, “h, well, if you just want to pacify your children…” I was like, I do, yes, in that moment.AshWell, and I think that's another part of it is that someone says it to us like that, and we're like, “well, I can't say yes,” right? But in the moment, yeah, there are times where it's like, I need you to be quiet. And as hard as this can be to think, sometimes it's like right now, I need you to be quiet and convenient because of the situation we're in. And that doesn't mean we're constantly expecting that of them, and hopefully that's not something we're doing all the time. But if the need is, oh my God, we're all melting down, and if we don't eat in the next 15 minutes, we're going to have a two hour DEFCON1 emergency on our hands, then, yeah, I'm gonna throw Peppa Pig on so that we can all become better regulated humans in the next 15 minutes and not have a hungry meltdown. And that sounds like a much better alternative to me!VirginiaThan flour all over my kitchen on a Wednesday, right? I mean, I'll never not be mad about it. It's truly the worst parenting advice I've ever received. So thank you for giving us all more space as caregivers to be able to articulate our own needs and articulate what we need to be present. It's what we can do in the face of gaps in the care system that leave us holding so much.That said: I think there are some nitty gritty aspects of this that we all struggle wit, so I want to talk about some of the nuts and bolts pieces. One of my biggest struggles is still the question of how much time is too much time? But you argue that time really isn't the measure we should be using. As you're saying, that need is going to vary day to day, and all the guidance that's been telling us, like, 30 minutes at this age, an hour at this age, all of that is not particularly germane to our lives. So can you explain both why time is less what we should fixate on? And then how do I release myself? How do I divest from the screen time diet culture?AshOh man, I wish I had a magic bullet for that one. We'll see what I can do.When I was writing this and thinking about it and making content about it, I kept thinking about you. Because the original time guidelines that everyone speaks back to—they're from the AAP. And they have not actually been used in about 10 years, but people still bring them up all the time. The “no time under two” and “up to an hour up to age five” and “one to two hours, five to 12.” And if you really dig in, I was following footnote after footnote for a while, trying to really find where did this actually come from? It's not based on some study that found that that's the ideal amount of time. It really came from a desire to find this middle ground of time spent being physically idle. These guidelines are about wanting to avoid childhood obesity.VirginiaOf course.AshIt all comes back, right?VirginiaI should have guessed it.AshAnd so in their original recommendations, the AAP note that partially this is to encourage a balance with physical movement. Which, of course, assumes that if you are not sitting watching TV or using an iPad, that you will be playing volleyball or something.VirginiaYou'll automatically be outside running around.AshExactly, of course, those are the only options.VirginiaIt also assumes that screen time is never physical. But a lot of kids are very physical when they're watching screens.AshExactly. And it, of course, immediately also imposes a morality of one of these things is better—moving your body is always better than a screen, which is not always going to be true, right? All these things have nuance in them. But I thought that was so interesting, and it shouldn't have surprised me, and yet somehow it still did. And of course it is good to find movement that is helpful for you and to give your kids an enjoyment of being outside or moving their bodies, or playing a sport. And putting all of that in opposition to something else they may enjoy, like a screen, really quickly goes to that diet culture piece of “well, how many minutes have you been doing that?” Because now we have to offset it with however many minutes you should be running laps or whatever.So those original recommendations are coming from a place of already trying to mitigate the negatives of sitting and doing something sort of passively leisurely. And in the last 10 years, they've moved away from that, and they now recommend what's called making a family media plan. Which actually I think is way better, because it is much more prioritizing what are you using this for? Can you be doing it together? What can you do? It's much more reasonable, I think. But many people still go back to those original recommendations, because like you said, it's a number. It's simple. Just tell me.VirginiaWe love to grab onto a number and grade ourselves.AshJust tell me how much time so that I can tell myself I'm I'm doing a good job, right? But you know, time is just one piece of information. It can be so specific with what am I using that time to do? If I'm sitting on my computer and doing work for an hour and a half, technically, that is screen time, but it is going to affect me a lot differently than if I'm watching Netflix or scrolling my phone for an hour and a half. I will feel very different after those things. And I think it's really important to be aware of that, and to make our kids aware of that from an early age, so that they are thinking about more than just, oh, it's been X amount of minutes. And therefore this is okay or not okay.Because all brains and all screens are different. And so one kid can watch 20 minutes of Paw Patrol, and they're going to be bouncing off the walls, because, for whatever reason, that's just a show that's really stimulating for them. And somebody else can sit and watch an hour and a half of something, and they'll be completely fine. So if you have a kid that is the first kid, and after 20 minutes, you're like, oh my god, it's not even half an hour. This is supposed to be an okay amount. This is how they're acting. We're right back to that “something's wrong. I'm wrong. They're bad,” as opposed to, “What is this telling me? What's something we could do differently? Could we try a different show? Could we try maybe having some physical movement before or after, see if that makes a difference?” It just puts us more in a place of being curious to figure out again, how do I make this work for me? What is my need? How do I make it work for us?And not to rattle on too long, but there was a big study done in the UK, involving over 120,000 kids. And they were trying to find what they called “the Goldilocks amount of time.”VirginiaYes. This is fascinating.AshSo it's the amount of time where benefit starts to wane. Where we are in that “just right”amount. Before that, might still be okay, but after that we're going to start seeing some negative impacts, particularly when it comes to behavior, for example.What they found in general was that the Goldilocks number tended to be around, I think, an hour and 40 minutes a day. Something around an hour and a half a day. But if you looked at certain types of screens, for computers or TV, it was much higher than that. It was closer to three hours a day before you started seeing some negative impacts. And even for things like smartphones, it was over an hour a day. But what I found so so interesting, is that they looked at both statistical significance, but also what they called “minimally important difference,” which was when you would actually notice these negative changes, subjectively, as a caregiver.So this meant how much would a kid have to be on a screen for their adult at home to actually notice “this is having an impact on you,” regularly. And that amount was over four and a half hours a day on screens.VirginiaBefore caregivers were like, “Okay, this is too much!” And the fact that the statistically significant findings for the minutia of what the researchers looking at is so different from what you as a caregiver are going to actually be thrown by. That was really mind blowing to me.AshRight, And that doesn't mean that statistical significance isn't important, necessarily. But we're talking about real minutiae. And that doesn't always mean that you will notice any difference in your actual life.Of course, some people are going to hear this and go, “But I don't want my kid on a screen for four and a half hours.” Sure. That's completely reasonable. And if your kid is having a hard time after an hour, still reasonable, still important. That's why we can think less about how many minutes has it been exactly, and more, what am I noticing? Because if I'm coming back to the need and you're like, okay, I have a meeting and I need an hour, right? If you know, “I cannot have them use their iPad for an hour, because they tend to become a dysregulated mess in 25 minutes,” that's much more useful information than “Well, it says they're allowed to have an hour of screen time per day so this should be fine because it's an hour.”VirginiaRight.AshIt sets you up for more success.VirginiaAnd if you know your kid can handle that hour fine and can, in fact, handle more fine, it doesn't mean, “well you had an hour of screen time while I was in a meeting so now we can't watch a show together later to relax together.” You don't have to take away and be that granular with the math of the screens. You can be like, yeah, we needed an extra hour for this meeting, and we'll still be able to watch our show later. Because that's what I notice with my kids. If I start to try to take away from some other screen time, then it's like, “Oh, god, wait, but that's the routine I'm used to!” You can't change it, and that's fair.AshYes, absolutely. And I would feel that way too, right? If someone were giving me something extra because it was a convenience to them, but then later was like, “oh, well, I have to take that from somewhere.” But they didn't tell me that. I would be like, Excuse me, that's weird. That's not how that works, right? This was a favor to you, right?VirginiaYeah, exactly. I didn't interrupt your meeting. You're welcome, Mom.Where the time anxiety does tend to kick in, though, is that so often it's hard for kids to transition off screens. So then parents think, “Well, it was too much time,” or, “The screen is bad.” This is another very powerful reframing in your work. So walk us through why just because a kid is having a hard time getting off screens doesn't mean it was too much and it doesn't mean that screens are evil? AshSo an example I use many times that you can tweak to be whatever thing would come up for your kid is bath time. I think especially when kids are in that sort of toddler, three, four age. When my kid was that age, we had a phase where transitioning to and from the bathtub was very hard. Getting into it was hard. But then getting out of it was hard.VirginiaThey don't ever want to get in. And then they never want to leave.AshThey never want to get out, right? And in those moments when my kid was really struggling to get out of the bathtub, imagine how it would sound if I was like, “Well, it it's the bathtub's fault.” Like it's the bath's fault that they are having such a hard time, it's because of the bubbles, and it smells too good, and I've made it too appealing and the water's too warm. Like, I mean, I sound unhinged, right?Virginia“We're going to stop bathing you.”AshExactly. We would not say, “Well, we can't have baths anymore.” Or when we go to the fun playground, and it's really hard to leave the fun playground, we don't blame the playground. When we're in the grocery store and they don't want to leave whichever aisle, we don't blame the grocery store. And we also don't stop taking them to the grocery store. We don't stop going to playgrounds. We don't stop having baths. Instead, we make different decisions, right? We try different things. We start a timer. We have a different transition. We talk about it beforehand. We strategize, we try things.VirginiaGive a “Hey, we're leaving in a few minutes!” so they're not caught off guard.AshExactly. We talk about it. Hey, last time it was really hard to leave here, we kind of let them know ahead of time, or we race them to the car. We find some way to make it more fun, to make the transition easier, right? We get creative, because we know that, hey, they're going to have to leave the grocery store. They're going to have to take baths in a reasonable amount of time as they grow up into their lives. We recognize the skill that's happening underneath it.And I think with screens, we don't always see those underlying skills, because we see it as this sort of superfluous thing, right? It's not needed. It's not necessary. Well, neither is going to a playground, technically.A lot of what we do is not technically required, but the skill underneath is still there. So when they are struggling with ending screen time, is it really the screen, or is it that it's hard to stop doing something fun. It's hard to stop in the middle of something. It's hard to stop if you have been playing for 20 minutes and you've lost every single race and you don't want to stop when you've just felt like you've lost over and over again, right? You want one more shot to one more shot, right?People are going to think, “Well, but screens are so much different than those other things.” Yes, a screen is designed differently than a playground or a bath. But we are going to have kids who are navigating a technological and digital world that we are struggle to even imagine, right? We're seeing glimpses of it, but it's going to be different than what we're experiencing now, and we want our kids to be able to navigate that with success. And that comes back to seeing the skills underneath. So when they're struggling with something like that, taking the screen out of it, and asking yourself, how would I handle this if it were anything else. How would I handle this if it were they're struggling to leave a friend's house? I probably wouldn't blame the friend, and I wouldn't blame their house, and I wouldn't blame their boys.VirginiaWe're never seeing that child again! Ash I would validate and I would tell them, it's hard. And I would still tell them “we're ending,” and we would talk about strategies to make it easier next time. And we would get curious and try something, and we would be showing our kids that, “hey, it's it's okay to have a hard time doing that thing. It's okay to have feelings about it. And we're still gonna do it. We're still going to end that thing.”Most of the time, the things that we are struggling with when it comes to screens actually boil down to one of three things, I call them the ABCs. It's either Access, which could be time, or when they're having it, or how much. Behavior, which you're kind of bringing up here. And Content, what's on the screen, what they're playing, what they what they have access to.And so sometimes we might think that the problem we're seeing in front of us is a behavior problem, right? I told them to put the screen away. They're not putting the screen away. That's a behavior problem. But sometimes it actually could be because it's an access issue, right? It's more time than they can really handle at that given moment. Or it could be content, because it's content that makes it harder to start and stop. So a big part of the book is really figuring out, how do I know what problem I'm even really dealing with here? And then what are some potential things that I can do about it? To try to problem solve, try to make changes and see if this helps, and if it helps, great, keep it. And if not, I can get curious and try something else. And so a lot of it is strategies to try and ways to kind of, you know, backwards engineer what might be going on, to figure out how to make it work for you, how to make it better.VirginiaIt's so helpful to feel like, okay, there's always one more thing I can tweak and adjust. Versus “it's all a failure. We have to throw it out.” That kind of all or nothing thinking that really is never productive. The reason I think it's so helpful that you draw that parallel with the bath or the play date is it reminds us that there are some kids for whom transitions are just always very difficult—like across the board. So you're not just seeing a screen time problem. You're being reminded “My kid is really building skills around transitions. We don't have them yet.” We hope we will have them at some point. But this is actually an opportunity to work on that, as opposed to a problem. We can actually practice some of these transition skills.AshAnd I really like coming back to the skill, because if we're thinking of it as a skill, then we're probably more likely to tell our kids that it's a skill, too. Because if we're just thinking of it as like, well, it's a screen. It's the screen's fault, it's the screen's fault. Then we might not say those literal words to our kids, but we might say, like, it's always so hard to turn off the TV. Why is that, right? We're talking about it as if it's this sort of amorphous, like it's only about the television, or it's only about the iPad, and we're missing the part of making it clear to our kids that, hey, this is a skill that you're working on, and we work on this skill in different ways.VirginiaI did some good repair with my kids after reading your book. Because I was definitely falling into the trap of talking about screen addiction. I thought I was saying to them, “It's not your fault. The screens are programmed to be bad for us in this way” So I thought, I was like at least not blaming them, but being like, we need less screens because they're so dangerous.But then I read your book, and I was like, oh, that's not helpful either. And I did have one of my kids saying, “Am I bad because I want to watch screens all the time?” And I was like, oh, that's too concrete and scary.And again, to draw the parallel with diet culture: It's just like telling kids sugar is bad, and then they think they're bad because they like sugar. So I did do some repair. I was like, “I read this book and now I've learned that that was not right.” They were like, oh, okay. We're healing in my house from that, so thank you.AshOh, you're very welcome, and I'm glad to hear that!I think about those parallels with food all the time, because sometimes it just helps me think, like, wait, would I be wanting to send this message about food or exercise or whatever? And if the answer is no, then how can I tweak it so that I'm sending a message I'd be okay with applying to other things. And I like being able to make those parallels with my kid. In my household right now, we're practicing flexibility. Flexibility is a skill that we're working on in so many parts of our lives. And when I say we, I do mean we. Me, everybody is working on this.VirginiaParents can use more flexibility, for sure.AshAbsolutely. And so like, when those moments are coming up, you know, I'm trying to say, like, hey, like, what skill is this right now? Who's having to be flexible right now? Flexible can be a good thing, right? We might be flexible by saying yes to eating dinner on the couch and watching a TV show. That's flexibility. Flexibility isn't just adjust your plans to be more convenient to me, child, so that I can go do something as an adult. And coming back to those skills so they can see, oh, okay, this isn't actually just about screens. This applies to every part of these of my life, or these different parts of my life, and if I'm working on it here, oh, wow, it feels easier over there. And so they can see that this applies throughout their life, and kind of feel more of that buy in of like, oh, I'm getting better at that. Or that was easier. That was harder. We want them to see that across the board.VirginiaOh, my God, absolutely.Let's talk about screens and neurodivergence a little bit. So one of my kiddos is neurodivergent, and I can both see how screens are wonderful for them at the end of a school day, when they come home and they're really depleted. Screen time is the thing they need to rest and regulate. And they love the world building games, which gives them this whole world to control and explore. And there's so much there that's wonderful.And, they definitely struggle more than their sibling with this transition piece, with getting off it. One kid will naturally put down the iPad at some point and go outside for a bit, and this kid will not. And it creates more anxiety for parents. Because neurodivergent kids may both need screens—in ways that maybe we're not totally comfortable with, but need to get comfortable with—and then struggle with the transition piece. So how do you think about this question differently with neurodivergence? Or or is it really the same thing you're just having to drill in differently?AshI think it is ultimately the same thing, but it certainly is going to feel quite more heightened. And I think especially for certain aspects of neurodivergence, especially, I think it feels really heightened because of some of the ways that they might be discussed, particularly online, when it comes to how they relate to technology. I think about ADHD, we'll see that a lot. Where I'll see many things online about, like, “kids with ADHD should never be on a screen. They should never be on a device, because they are so dopamine-seeking.” And I have to just say that I find that to be such an ableist framing. Because with ADHD, we're talking about a dopamine deficient brain. And I don't think that we would be having that same conversation about someone needing insulin, right? Like, we wouldn't be saying, like, oh yeah, nope, they can't take that insulin. VirginiaThey're just craving that insulin they need to stay alive.AshA kid seeking a thing that they're that they are somehow deficient in—that's not some sort of defiant behavior. VirginiaNo, it's a pretty adaptive strategy.AshAbsolutely, it is. And we want kids to know that nobody's brain is good or bad, right? There's not a good brain or a bad brain. There are all brains are going to have things that are easier or harder. And it's about learning the brain that you're in, and what works or doesn't work for the brain that you're in.And all brains are different, right? Neurotypical brains and neurodivergent brains within those categories are obviously going to be vastly different. What works for one won't work for another, and being able to figure out what works for them, instead of just, “because you have this kind of brain, you shouldn't ever do this thing,” that's going to set them up for more success. And I think it's great that you mentioned both how a screen can be so regulating, particularly for neurodivergent brains, and then the double-edged sword of that is that then you have to stop. VirginiaTransition off back into the world.AshSo if the pain point is a transition, what is it really coming from? Is it coming from the executive function piece of “I don't know how to find a place to stop?” A lot of people, particularly kids ADHD, they often like games that are more open-ended. So they might like something like a Minecraft or an Animal Crossing or the Sims where you can hyperfocus and deep dive into something. But what's difficult about that is that, you know, if I play Mario Kart, the level ends, it's a very obvious ending.VirginiaRight? And you can say, “One more level, and we're done.”AshExactly. We've reached the end of the championship. I'm on the podium. I quit now, right?But there's a never ending series of of tasks with a more open-ended game. And especially if I'm in my hyper focus zone, right? I can just be thinking, like, well, then I can do this and this and this and this and this, right?And I'm adding on to my list, and the last thing I want to do in that moment is get pulled out of it when I'm really feeling like I'm in the zone. So if that's the kind of transition that's difficult. And it's much less about games and more about “how do I stop in the middle of a project?” Because that's essentially what that is.And that would apply if I'm at school and I'm in the middle of an essay and we're finishing it up tomorrow. Or I'm trying to decorate a cake, and we're trying to walk out the door and I have to stop what I'm doing and come back later. So one of the tricks that I have found really helpful is to ask the question of, “How will you know when you're done?” Or how will you know you're at a stopping point? What would a stopping point be today? And getting them to sort of even visualize it, or say it out loud, so that they can think about, “Oh, here's how I basically break down a giant task into smaller pieces,” because that's essentially what that is.VirginiaThat's a great tip. Ash“Okay, you have five minutes. What is the last thing you're going to do today?” Because then it's concrete in terms of, like, I'm not asking the last thing, and it will take you half an hour, right? I'm at, we have five minutes. What's the last thing you're wrapping up? What are you going to do?Then, if it's someone who's very focused in this world, and they're very into that world, then that last thing can also be our transition out of it. As they're turning it off, the very first thing we're saying to them is, “So what was that last thing you were doing?”VirginiaOh, that's nice.AshThen they're telling it to us, and then we can get curious. We can ask questions. We can get a little into their world to help them transition out of that world. That doesn't mean that we have to understand what they're telling us, frankly. It doesn't mean we have to know all the nuance. But we can show that interest. I think this is also really, really important, because then we are showing them it's not us versus the screen. We're not opposing the screen, like it's the enemy or something. And we're showing them, “Hey, I can tell you're interested in this, so I'm interested in it because you are.” Like, I care about you, so I want to know more.VirginiaAnd then they can invite you into their world, which what a lot of neurodivergent kids need. We're asking them to be part of the larger world all the time. And how nice we can meet them where they are a little more.AshAbsolutely. The other thing I would say is that something I think people don't always realize, especially if they don't play games as much, or if they are not neurodivergent and playing games, is they might miss that video games actually are extremely well-accommodated worlds, in terms of accommodating neurodivergence.So thinking about something like ADHD, to go back to that example, it's like, okay, some really common classroom accommodations for ADHD, from the educator perspective, the accommodations I see a lot are frequent check ins, having a checklist, breaking down a large task into smaller chunks, objectives, having a visual organizer.Well, I think about a video game, and it's like, okay, if I want to know what I have available to me, I can press the pause menu and see my inventory at any time. If I want to know what I should be doing, because I have forgotten, I can look at a menu and see, like, what's my objective right now? Or I can bring up the map and it will show me where I supposed to be going. If I start to deviate from what I'm supposed to be doing, the game will often be like, “Hey, don't forget, you're supposed to be going over there!” It'll get me back on task. If I'm trying to make a potion that has eight ingredients, the game will list them all out for me, and it will check them off as I go, so I can visually see how I'm how I'm achieving this task. It does a lot of that accommodation for me. And those accommodations are not as common in the real world, or at least not as easily achieved.And so a lot of neurodivergent kids will succeed easily in these game worlds. And we might think “oh because it's addicting, or the algorithm, or it's just because they love it” But there are often these structural design differences that actually make it more accessible to them.And if we notice, oh, wow, they have no problem knowing what to do when they're playing Zelda, because they just keep checking their objective list all the time or whatever—that's great information.VirginiaAnd helps us think, how can we do that in real life? AshExactly. We can go to them and say, hey, I noticed you, you seem to check your inventory a lot when you're playing that game. How do we make it so that when you look in your closet, you can just as easily see what shirts you own. Whatever the thing may be, so that we're showing them, “hey, bring that into the rest of your world that works for you here.” Let's make it work for you elsewhere, instead of thinking of it as a reason they're obsessed with screens, and now we resent the screens for that. Bring that in so that it can benefit the rest of their lives.VirginiaI'm now like, okay, that just reframes something else very important for me. You have such a helpful way of helping us divest from the guilt and the shame and actually look at this in a positive and empowering way for us and our kids. And I'm just so grateful for it. It really is a game changer for me.AshOh, thank you so much. I'm so glad to hear that it was helpful and empowering for you, and I just hope that it can be that for others as well.ButterAshSo my family and I have been lucky enough to spend quite a lot of time in Japan. And one of the wonderful things about Japan is they have a very huge bike culture. I think people think of the Netherlands as Bike cCentral, but Japan kind of rivals them.And they have a particular kind of bike that you cannot get in the United States. It's called a Mamachari, which is like a portmanteau of mom and chariot. And it's sort of like a cargo bike, but they are constructed a little differently and have some features that I love. And so when I've been in Japan, we are on those bikes. I'm always like, I love this kind of bike. I want this kind of bike for me forever. And my recent Butter has been trying to find something like that that I can have in my day to day life. And I found something recently, and got a lovely step through bike on Facebook Marketplace. VirginiaSo cool! That's exciting to find on marketplace, too.AshOh yes, having a bike that like I actually enjoy riding, I had my old bike from being a teenager, and it just was not functional. I was like, “This is not fun.” And now having one that I enjoy, I'm like, oh yes. I feel like a kid again. It's lovely.VirginiaThat's a great Butter. My Butter is something both my kids and my pets and I are all really enjoying. I'm gonna drop a link in the chat for you. It is called a floof, and it is basically a human-sized dog bed that I found on Etsy. It's like, lined with fake fur.AshMy God. I'm looking at it right now.VirginiaIsn't it hilarious?AshWow. I'm so glad you sent a picture, because that is not what I was picturing?Virginia I can't describe it accurately. It's like a cross between a human-sized dog bed and a shopping bag? Sort of? AshYes, yes, wow. It's like a hot tub.VirginiaIt's like a hot tub, but no water. You just sit in it. I think they call it a cuddle cave. I don't understand how to explain it, but it's the floof. And it's in our family room. And it's not inexpensive, but it does basically replace a chair. So if you think of it as a furniture purchase, it's not so bad. There's always at least a cat or a dog sleeping in it. Frequently a child is in it. My boyfriend likes to be in it. Everyone gravitates towards it. And you can put pillows in it or a blanket.Neurodivergent people, in particular, really love it, because I think it provides a lot of sensory feedback? And it's very enclosed and cozy. It's great for the day we're having today, which is a very laid back, low demand, watch as much screen as you want, kind of day. So I've got one kid bundled into the floof right now with a bunch of blankets in her iPad, and she's so happy. AshOh my gosh. Also, it kind of looks like the person is sitting in a giant pita, which I also love.VirginiaThat's what it is! It's like a giant pita, but soft and cozy. It's like being in a pita pocket. And I'm sure there are less expensive versions, this was like, 300 something dollars, so it is an investment. But they're handmade by some delightful person in the Netherlands.Whenever we have play dates, there are always two or three kids, snuggled up in it together. There's something extremely addictive about it. I don't know. I don't really know how to explain why it's great, but it's great.AshOh, that is lovely.VirginiaAll right, well tell obviously, everyone needs to go to their bookstore and get Power On: Managing Screen Time to Benefit the Whole Family. Where else can we find you, Ash? How can we support your work?AshYou can find me on Instagram at the gamer educator, and I also cross post my Instagram posts to Substack, and I'm on Substack as Screen Time Strategies. It's all the same content, just that way you're getting it in your inbox without, without having to go to Instagram. So if that's something that you are trying to maybe move away from, get it via Substack. And my book Power On: Managing Screen Time to Benefit the Whole Family is available starting August 26 is when it fully releases.VirginiaAmazing. Thank you so much. This was really great.AshThank you so much for having me back.The Burnt Toast Podcast is produced and hosted by Virginia Sole-Smith (follow me on Instagram) and Corinne Fay, who runs @SellTradePlus, and Big Undies.The Burnt Toast logo is by Deanna Lowe.Our theme music is by Farideh.Tommy Harron is our audio engineer.Thanks for listening and for supporting anti-diet, body liberation journalism! This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit virginiasolesmith.substack.com/subscribe

Original Air Date: 3-9-1987Oprah talks to moms and dads about the everyday chaos of parenting and sits down with experts who offer real-world strategies to help survive it all—without losing your sanity. From toddler tantrums to mealtime meltdowns, this episode is packed with practical, proven advice to help parents feel more calm and in control. Guests include Brooke Beebe, author of Best Bets for Babies and Tips for Toddlers, who transformed her own parenting struggles into wisdom by connecting with thousands of families and child care experts. Dr. Kevin Leman, author of Making Children Mind Without Losing Yours, introduces his no-nonsense “reality discipline” approach to setting effective boundaries. And Dr. James Comer, a Yale-trained child psychiatrist and Parents Magazine columnist, shares valuable insights drawn from decades of research and hands-on experience.

In this very special episode of Connected Parenting, I sit down with my youngest daughter, Olivia my true “gladiator child.” Fierce, sensitive, musical, and deeply thoughtful, Olivia has always had a strong counterwill and a fire that pushed me as a parent in all the best (and hardest!) ways.Parents often ask me, “What will my gladiator child be like when they're older?” In this conversation, Olivia shares openly about what it felt like to be that child the eight-year-old who struggled, the teen learning to navigate big feelings, and the young adult she is now.If you've ever worried about what the future holds for your strong-willed child, this episode will give you hope, perspective, and connection.Jennifer's Takeaways:Olivia's Experience as a Gladiator Child (03:55)Challenges of Parenting a Gladiator Child (05:57)Integration and Growth of a Gladiator Child (07:51)Advice for Parents of Gladiator Children (10:04)Strategies for Managing Gladiator Child Behavior (14:23)Impact of Gladiator Child Behavior on Parents (15:11)Olivia's Role as a Kids Club Counselor (23:39)Meet Jennifer KolariJennifer Kolari is the host of the “Connected Parenting” weekly podcast and the co-host of “The Mental Health Comedy” podcast. Kolari is a frequent guest on Nationwide morning shows and podcasts in the US and Canada. Her advice can also be found in many Canadian and US magazines such as; Today's Parent, Parents Magazine and Canadian Family.Kolari's powerful parenting model is based on the neurobiology of love, teaching parents how to use compassion and empathy as powerful medicine to transform challenging behavior and build children's emotional resilience and emotional shock absorbers.Jennifer's wisdom, quick wit and down to earth style help parents navigate modern-day parenting problems, offering real-life examples as well as practical and effective tools and strategies.Her highly entertaining, inspiring workshops are shared with warmth and humour, making her a crowd-pleasing speaker with schools, medical professionals, corporations and agencies throughout North America, Europe and Asia.One of the nation's leading parenting experts, Jennifer Kolari, is a highly sought- after international speaker and the founder of Connected Parenting. A child and family therapist with a busy practice based in San Diego and Toronto, Kolari is also the author of Connected Parenting: How to Raise A Great Kid (Penguin Group USA and Penguin Canada, 2009) and You're Ruining My Life! (But Not Really): Surviving the Teenage Years with Connected Parenting (Penguin Canada, 2011).

As moms, we all want to raise strong, faithful sons who will grow into men of godly character. But parenting boys in today's culture comes with unique challenges. In this episode, I'm joined by Molly DeFrank — mom of three boys (and three girls), who has been featured in Parents Magazine, Good Morning America, and Mama Bear Apologetics.  Together, we unpack: How faith shapes the way we parent The biggest cultural challenges boys face today What the Bible teaches us about raising sons The truth about toxic masculinity The struggles Christian moms often face—and how to overcome them 8 critical things your son needs before he turns 10 Encouragement for moms who feel overwhelmed or like they're failing Molly shares this powerful reminder: “Our mission as mothers should be to teach our sons objective truth and affirm their identity as assigned by God.” If you're a boy mama (or a mama who simply wants to raise kids grounded in God's truth), this conversation will encourage, equip, and inspire you! Get Molly's book: https://amzn.to/3Jo1GCY  _ Christian parenting encouragement for boy moms. Molly DeFrank on toxic masculinity, culture, and 8 things your son needs before 10. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Endless waiting, silences and just the general feeling of banging your head against the brick wall. Sound familiar? You're not alone. A career in publishing is tough. So how do you stick the course? How do you keep going in the face of long silences and periods of constant rejection? We are so lucky to talk to the shining star that is Ines Ayala @byinesayala. One of our oldest and dearest cheerleaders for Of the Publishing Persuasion. Come join us as we get deep and talk all things writing journey and how to stay present and positive in the unpredictable publishing wilds.We can't wait for you to tune in, but first, here's more about Ines:Ines Ayala is a children's book writer who crafts voicy and immerseive teen novels and heartwarming picture books. A lifelong storyteller (and self-proclaimed comma abuser), she was longlisted for the 2020 Voyage YA Literary Magazine short story contest for young adult contemporary fiction. Passionate about diverse representation in children's literature, she balances her writing with roles as a Regional Marketing Manager for a K–12 curriculum publisher and Communications Manager for the Latinx Kidlit Book Festival.Her love for words led her to a marketing degree in 2019, but stories have always been her true calling. You can also find her work in Parents Magazine, where she turns moments of personal growth into (hopefully) helpful anecdotes for parents.Born and raised on Long Island, she lives there with her daughter and their dog, Rocky—affectionately nicknamed Pollo for his irrational fears (including his own shadow) and his undying love for anything chicken-related.Follow her on Instagram and Bluesky @byinesayala or subscribe to her Substack for inspiration for your own writing journey!https://www.inesayala.com/#OfthePublishingPersuasion #podcast #Publishing #writingcommunity #writingpodcast #Bookish #Bookstagram #podcastsforwriters #writingpodcast #authortube #authorsofinstagram #authorssupportingauthors #authorsofig #authorscommunity #writersofinstagram #writerspodcast #writeradvice #podcasting #podcasts #podcastersofinstagram #podcastlife #Kidlit #ChildrensBooks #latinxbooks #latinxwriters #latinxauthors #latinxinpublishing #LatinxStorytellersConference #LatinxKidLit #KidLitFestival 

In this episode of Connected Parenting, we flip the script on a common parenting concern; texting. While we often hear about the downsides of screens, social media, and endless scrolling, texting can actually be a powerful connection tool between you and your teen.I'll share why, in certain moments, a text might be the bridge that keeps communication open, helps your teen feel seen and understood, and even diffuses tension before it escalates. From using texts to check in during their busy day to sending a quick message that shows you're thinking of them, I'll walk you through the situations where texting shines and how to use it effectively without replacing meaningful face-to-face conversations.If you've ever worried about “too much screen time” but also want to strengthen your bond with your teen, this episode will give you a fresh perspective and practical tips to make texting work for your relationship instead of against it.Jennifer's Takeaways:Benefits of Texting Your Teen (00:00)Using Texting for Specific Tasks (02:09)Texting for Connection and Affirmation (05:07)Overcoming Texting Challenges (07:26)Meet Jennifer KolariJennifer Kolari is the host of the “Connected Parenting” weekly podcast and the co-host of “The Mental Health Comedy” podcast. Kolari is a frequent guest on Nationwide morning shows and podcasts in the US and Canada. Her advice can also be found in many Canadian and US magazines such as; Today's Parent, Parents Magazine and Canadian Family.Kolari's powerful parenting model is based on the neurobiology of love, teaching parents how to use compassion and empathy as powerful medicine to transform challenging behavior and build children's emotional resilience and emotional shock absorbers.Jennifer's wisdom, quick wit and down to earth style help parents navigate modern-day parenting problems, offering real-life examples as well as practical and effective tools and strategies.Her highly entertaining, inspiring workshops are shared with warmth and humour, making her a crowd-pleasing speaker with schools, medical professionals, corporations and agencies throughout North America, Europe and Asia.One of the nation's leading parenting experts, Jennifer Kolari, is a highly sought- after international speaker and the founder of Connected Parenting. A child and family therapist with a busy practice based in San Diego and Toronto, Kolari is also the author of Connected Parenting: How to Raise A Great Kid (Penguin Group USA and Penguin Canada, 2009) and You're Ruining My Life! (But Not Really): Surviving the Teenage Years with Connected Parenting (Penguin Canada, 2011).

Have you ever felt almost afraid to set a boundary—especially with someone you love? You're not alone. In this episode, I share the story of a client who jokingly called it “boundary phobia” and how that phrase perfectly captures the fear and discomfort so many of us feel when we try to protect our time, energy, or emotional well-being. We'll talk about: The fears that keep us saying “yes” when we want to say “no” The myths we've been taught about boundaries and relationships Why boundaries are about action as much as they are about words How to set healthy boundaries with yourself first—and why that's the key to holding them with others A short guided reflection to help you identify one internal boundary you can start practicing today If you've been feeling drained, resentful, or guilty about saying no, this episode will help you shift the way you think about boundaries so they feel less like walls and more like doors you control.   References from this episode: Parents Magazine study on accepting unwanted invitations: https://www.parents.com/why-saying-no-is-good-for-your-mental-health-8415963 Stanford Student Affairs research on boundaries strengthening relationships: https://studentaffairs.stanford.edu/how-life-treeting-you-importance-of-boundaries 2020 study on relational boundaries and enforcement: https://self-compassion.org/wp-content/uploads/2021/11/Luchner-and-Snyder-2020-The-Importance-of-Flexible-Relational-Boundaries-.pdf Mental Health Center on boundaries and burnout: https://www.mentalhealthctr.com/boundaries-and-mental-health Dr. Kristin Neff's self-compassion research: https://self-compassion.org/the-three-elements-of-self-compassion-2   Resources Mentioned: Better Than Before Breast Cancer Life Coaching Membership: https://www.thebreastcancerrecoverycoach.com/lifecoaching Creating a Life You Love in 168 Hours a Week: https://www.thebreastcancerrecoverycoach.com/168-hours-sp   Let's Connect! If this episode helped you breathe a little easier, please share it with a friend or leave a review. Every share helps spread this message of hope, healing, and whole-person wellness.

Every parent wants their child to feel confident, connected, and well-liked but social health isn't just about having friends. It's a protective factor that influences everything from mental health to academic success.Whether your child is struggling socially or is already a natural leader, this episode is packed with tools, scripts, and mindset shifts to help you parent with connection and raise a child who chooses authenticity over popularity.Let's build the foundation for confident, emotionally resilient kids who lead with kindness.Jennifer's Takeaways:Helping Children Become Leaders, Not Followers (00:00)Modeling Empathy and Integrity (03:14)Teaching Children to Navigate Social Situations (07:58)The Role of Parents in Improving Social Skills (09:24)Incorporating Empathy into Family Values (11:39)Meet Jennifer KolariJennifer Kolari is the host of the “Connected Parenting” weekly podcast and the co-host of “The Mental Health Comedy” podcast. Kolari is a frequent guest on Nationwide morning shows and podcasts in the US and Canada. Her advice can also be found in many Canadian and US magazines such as; Today's Parent, Parents Magazine and Canadian Family.Kolari's powerful parenting model is based on the neurobiology of love, teaching parents how to use compassion and empathy as powerful medicine to transform challenging behavior and build children's emotional resilience and emotional shock absorbers.Jennifer's wisdom, quick wit and down to earth style help parents navigate modern-day parenting problems, offering real-life examples as well as practical and effective tools and strategies.Her highly entertaining, inspiring workshops are shared with warmth and humour, making her a crowd-pleasing speaker with schools, medical professionals, corporations and agencies throughout North America, Europe and Asia.One of the nation's leading parenting experts, Jennifer Kolari, is a highly sought- after international speaker and the founder of Connected Parenting. A child and family therapist with a busy practice based in San Diego and Toronto, Kolari is also the author of Connected Parenting: How to Raise A Great Kid (Penguin Group USA and Penguin Canada, 2009) and You're Ruining My Life! (But Not Really): Surviving the Teenage Years with Connected Parenting (Penguin Canada, 2011).

The Deep with Erika Ahern is sponsored by Taylor Frigon Capital Management, serving clients at every stage of wealth: from first-time investors to high-net-worth families and organizations seeking full-service wealth guidance. Taylor Frigon provides institutional asset management solutions tailored to the needs of individuals, families and small businesses: https://cvote.it/taylorfrigonMany couples have been scared by society into thinking they should put off having kids until all the perfect conditions are set in place. Turns out the idea of “ready” is a myth that doesn't exist. In this episode of The Deep, Erika debunks three myths that keep couples from having kids and then makes the case for having children BEFORE you feel completely ready. 0:00 Parents Magazine daunting “readiness” checklist2:12 Parenthood is not just an “opt-in” feature of marriage2:53 Sponsor: Taylor Frigon Capital Management4:24 3 Myths that keep couples from having kids7:11 Here's the truth: let go of “control”8:06 Words of encouragement for pro-baby courage9:48 Choose adventure, choose children!Subscribe to the LOOPcast on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@theLOOPcast

In this week's episode replay, I'll walk you through how to understand what's really going on underneath that sibling resentment, how to use empathy and the CALM technique to shift the emotional dynamic, and most importantly, how to parent both kids through this without picking sides or reinforcing harmful patterns.Jennifer's Takeaways:Handling Sibling Resentment: Introduction and Initial Steps (00:00)Understanding Family Patterns and Personal Biases (01:24)Addressing the Resentful Child: Gladiator Kids (01:55)The Role of the Easygoing Child (06:08)Strategies for Managing Sibling Dynamics (10:03)Building Connections and Encouraging Cooperation (13:16)Balancing Individual and Group Time (15:53)Addressing Sibling Rivalry and Play Therapy (16:24)Meet Jennifer KolariJennifer Kolari is the host of the “Connected Parenting” weekly podcast and the co-host of “The Mental Health Comedy” podcast. Kolari is a frequent guest on Nationwide morning shows and podcasts in the US and Canada. Her advice can also be found in many Canadian and US magazines such as; Today's Parent, Parents Magazine and Canadian Family.Kolari's powerful parenting model is based on the neurobiology of love, teaching parents how to use compassion and empathy as powerful medicine to transform challenging behavior and build children's emotional resilience and emotional shock absorbers.Jennifer's wisdom, quick wit and down to earth style help parents navigate modern-day parenting problems, offering real-life examples as well as practical and effective tools and strategies.Her highly entertaining, inspiring workshops are shared with warmth and humour, making her a crowd-pleasing speaker with schools, medical professionals, corporations and agencies throughout North America, Europe and Asia.One of the nation's leading parenting experts, Jennifer Kolari, is a highly sought- after international speaker and the founder of Connected Parenting. A child and family therapist with a busy practice based in San Diego and Toronto, Kolari is also the author of Connected Parenting: How to Raise A Great Kid (Penguin Group USA and Penguin Canada, 2009) and You're Ruining My Life! (But Not Really): Surviving the Teenage Years with Connected Parenting (Penguin Canada, 2011).

Today we're revisiting the world of summer camp and looking at why it's more than just fun in the sun and how it can be a life-changing experience for your child. From building independence and emotional resilience to fostering leadership and a stronger sense of self, camp offers so many developmental benefits.Tune in to learn how summer camp can help shape your child's emotional growth, and how you can support them every step of the way.Jennifer's Takeaways:Importance and Benefits of Summer Camp (00:00)Experiences and Activities at Summer Camp (01:59)Independence and Personal Growth at Camp (04:34)Preparing Children for Camp (05:22)Handling Homesickness and Adjusting to Camp Life (07:59)Post-Camp Adjustment and Long-Term Benefits (10:23)Resources and Support for Parents (11:49)Meet Jennifer KolariJennifer Kolari is the host of the “Connected Parenting” weekly podcast and the co-host of “The Mental Health Comedy” podcast. Kolari is a frequent guest on Nationwide morning shows and podcasts in the US and Canada. Her advice can also be found in many Canadian and US magazines such as; Today's Parent, Parents Magazine and Canadian Family.Kolari's powerful parenting model is based on the neurobiology of love, teaching parents how to use compassion and empathy as powerful medicine to transform challenging behavior and build children's emotional resilience and emotional shock absorbers.Jennifer's wisdom, quick wit and down to earth style help parents navigate modern-day parenting problems, offering real-life examples as well as practical and effective tools and strategies.Her highly entertaining, inspiring workshops are shared with warmth and humour, making her a crowd-pleasing speaker with schools, medical professionals, corporations and agencies throughout North America, Europe and Asia.One of the nation's leading parenting experts, Jennifer Kolari, is a highly sought- after international speaker and the founder of Connected Parenting. A child and family therapist with a busy practice based in San Diego and Toronto, Kolari is also the author of Connected Parenting: How to Raise A Great Kid (Penguin Group USA and Penguin Canada, 2009) and You're Ruining My Life! (But Not Really): Surviving the Teenage Years with Connected Parenting (Penguin Canada, 2011).

In this week's episode of the Connected Parenting podcast, we're diving into a topic that might be raising eyebrows (and blood pressure) in your home: Why are kids so obsessed with scary books, movies, and shows?Is it just a phase, or something more concerning?Should you let them watch or read these things or shut it down completely?Whether your child loves ghost stories, creepy YouTube videos, or horror movies, this episode will help you decode the fascination and guide them with confidence, calm, and connection.Jennifer's Takeaways:Understanding the Appeal of Scary Content for Tweens and Teens (00:00)Developmental Stage and Coping Mechanisms (02:02)Social Bonding and Personal Growth (03:46)Escapism and Curiosity (05:07)Balancing Media Consumption and Family Bonding (06:19)Meet Jennifer KolariJennifer Kolari is the host of the “Connected Parenting” weekly podcast and the co-host of “The Mental Health Comedy” podcast. Kolari is a frequent guest on Nationwide morning shows and podcasts in the US and Canada. Her advice can also be found in many Canadian and US magazines such as; Today's Parent, Parents Magazine and Canadian Family.Kolari's powerful parenting model is based on the neurobiology of love, teaching parents how to use compassion and empathy as powerful medicine to transform challenging behavior and build children's emotional resilience and emotional shock absorbers.Jennifer's wisdom, quick wit and down to earth style help parents navigate modern-day parenting problems, offering real-life examples as well as practical and effective tools and strategies.Her highly entertaining, inspiring workshops are shared with warmth and humour, making her a crowd-pleasing speaker with schools, medical professionals, corporations and agencies throughout North America, Europe and Asia.One of the nation's leading parenting experts, Jennifer Kolari, is a highly sought- after international speaker and the founder of Connected Parenting. A child and family therapist with a busy practice based in San Diego and Toronto, Kolari is also the author of Connected Parenting: How to Raise A Great Kid (Penguin Group USA and Penguin Canada, 2009) and You're Ruining My Life! (But Not Really): Surviving the Teenage Years with Connected Parenting (Penguin Canada, 2011).

Why are teens up at midnight and sleeping until noon? Why is it so hard to get them to bed at a decent hour or up in time for school or weekend plans? You're not alone in your frustration, and you're definitely not imagining things. There's real science behind what's happening.Whether your teen is turning into a night owl or just can't get out of bed, this episode will give you tools and insight to respond with calm, connection, and clarity instead of chaos and conflict.Jennifer's Takeaways:Understanding the Importance of Sleep for Teens (01:36)Reasons Behind Teens' Sleep Resistance (03:09)Impact of Screens on Teens' Sleep (04:51)Signs of Depression and Anxiety Related to Sleep (06:45)Strategies for Improving Teens' Sleep (08:26)Final Tips and Resources (14:37)Meet Jennifer KolariJennifer Kolari is the host of the “Connected Parenting” weekly podcast and the co-host of “The Mental Health Comedy” podcast. Kolari is a frequent guest on Nationwide morning shows and podcasts in the US and Canada. Her advice can also be found in many Canadian and US magazines such as; Today's Parent, Parents Magazine and Canadian Family.Kolari's powerful parenting model is based on the neurobiology of love, teaching parents how to use compassion and empathy as powerful medicine to transform challenging behavior and build children's emotional resilience and emotional shock absorbers.Jennifer's wisdom, quick wit and down to earth style help parents navigate modern-day parenting problems, offering real-life examples as well as practical and effective tools and strategies.Her highly entertaining, inspiring workshops are shared with warmth and humour, making her a crowd-pleasing speaker with schools, medical professionals, corporations and agencies throughout North America, Europe and Asia.One of the nation's leading parenting experts, Jennifer Kolari, is a highly sought- after international speaker and the founder of Connected Parenting. A child and family therapist with a busy practice based in San Diego and Toronto, Kolari is also the author of Connected Parenting: How to Raise A Great Kid (Penguin Group USA and Penguin Canada, 2009) and You're Ruining My Life! (But Not Really): Surviving the Teenage Years with Connected Parenting (Penguin Canada, 2011).

In this episode of Connected Parenting, we dive into a powerful visual and verbal tool that helps kids regulate their behavior and emotions called the "Stoplight Technique" (also known as Red Light, Green Light).As parents, one of our greatest challenges is guiding our kids through big feelings and impulsive behavior without losing our own cool. That's where this simple yet effective method comes in.Listen in to hear me explain how the stoplight framework teaches children cause and effect, emotional regulation, and personal accountability, all in a way that's age-appropriate and easy to apply at home or in the classroom. It gives them a clear visual anchor to understand what's expected, and when things need to pause or shift.You'll also learn how to modify the strategy for teenagers (because let's be honest, a red light chart on the fridge might not go over so well at 15), and why this tool can be just as helpful for you as the parent.Whether your child struggles with emotional outbursts, transitions, or impulsive behavior, this episode offers a compassionate, practical way to build emotional intelligence together.Jennifer's Takeaways:Red Light, Green Light Technique Overview (00:00)Explanation of Red Light, Green Light Behaviors (01:05)Handling Yellow Light Behaviors (03:01)Applying the Technique to Teenagers (06:57)Using the Technique for Consistency and Flexibility (11:36)Meet Jennifer KolariJennifer Kolari is the host of the “Connected Parenting” weekly podcast and the co-host of “The Mental Health Comedy” podcast. Kolari is a frequent guest on Nationwide morning shows and podcasts in the US and Canada. Her advice can also be found in many Canadian and US magazines such as; Today's Parent, Parents Magazine and Canadian Family.Kolari's powerful parenting model is based on the neurobiology of love, teaching parents how to use compassion and empathy as powerful medicine to transform challenging behavior and build children's emotional resilience and emotional shock absorbers.Jennifer's wisdom, quick wit and down to earth style help parents navigate modern-day parenting problems, offering real-life examples as well as practical and effective tools and strategies.Her highly entertaining, inspiring workshops are shared with warmth and humour, making her a crowd-pleasing speaker with schools, medical professionals, corporations and agencies throughout North America, Europe and Asia.One of the nation's leading parenting experts, Jennifer Kolari, is a highly sought- after international speaker and the founder of Connected Parenting. A child and family therapist with a busy practice based in San Diego and Toronto, Kolari is also the author of Connected Parenting: How to Raise A Great Kid (Penguin Group USA and Penguin Canada, 2009) and You're Ruining My Life! (But Not Really): Surviving the Teenage Years with Connected Parenting (Penguin Canada, 2011).

As the busy school year winds down, summer opens the door to something we often miss, space to slow down, breathe, and truly reconnect with our kids.In this heartfelt replay, we say goodbye to the hectic pace and explore simple, intentional ways to make this summer feel calm, connected, and full of joy for the whole family.Remember; summer doesn't need to be packed to be powerful, it just needs presence.Jennifer's Takeaways:Summer as a Time for Connection and Refreshment (00:00)The Calm Technique and Its Benefits (02:07)Practical Application of the Calm Technique (03:40)Structuring Summer Days for Children (07:27)Balancing Structure and Flexibility in Summer (09:38)Divide and Conquer Strategy for Family Outings (11:38)Maintaining Structure During Vacations (13:21)Bringing Back the Magic of Family Time (14:11)Meet Jennifer KolariJennifer Kolari is the host of the “Connected Parenting” weekly podcast and the co-host of “The Mental Health Comedy” podcast. Kolari is a frequent guest on Nationwide morning shows and podcasts in the US and Canada. Her advice can also be found in many Canadian and US magazines such as; Today's Parent, Parents Magazine and Canadian Family.Kolari's powerful parenting model is based on the neurobiology of love, teaching parents how to use compassion and empathy as powerful medicine to transform challenging behavior and build children's emotional resilience and emotional shock absorbers.Jennifer's wisdom, quick wit and down to earth style help parents navigate modern-day parenting problems, offering real-life examples as well as practical and effective tools and strategies.Her highly entertaining, inspiring workshops are shared with warmth and humour, making her a crowd-pleasing speaker with schools, medical professionals, corporations and agencies throughout North America, Europe and Asia.One of the nation's leading parenting experts, Jennifer Kolari, is a highly sought- after international speaker and the founder of Connected Parenting. A child and family therapist with a busy practice based in San Diego and Toronto, Kolari is also the author of Connected Parenting: How to Raise A Great Kid (Penguin Group USA and Penguin Canada, 2009) and You're Ruining My Life! (But Not Really): Surviving the Teenage Years with Connected Parenting (Penguin Canada, 2011).

You may have a child who freezes up for hours before a dentist appointment or refuses to start anything all day because they're waiting for a playdate or appointment later on. It's not laziness or defiance, it's their ADHD brain getting stuck in “waiting mode.”Today we unpack what ADHD waiting mode is, why it happens, and how it connects to hyperfixation, time blindness, and emotional regulation. Listen in to hear me explain why even bright, capable kids with ADHD often struggle to shift gears, stay organized, or follow through, especially when there's a delay between now and the task or reward.Whether you're parenting a “neuro-spicy” child or navigating your own ADHD challenges, this episode offers empathy, understanding, and a powerful toolkit to help you move forward with compassion and connection.Jennifer's Takeaways:Understanding ADHD and Its Impact on Daily Life (00:00)Hyperfocus and Time Blindness in ADHD (01:27)ADHD Waiting Mode and Its Effects (11:13)Strategies for Managing ADHD Waiting Mode (11:29)Meet Jennifer KolariJennifer Kolari is the host of the “Connected Parenting” weekly podcast and the co-host of “The Mental Health Comedy” podcast. Kolari is a frequent guest on Nationwide morning shows and podcasts in th US and Canada. Her advice can also be found in many Canadian and US magazines such as; Today's Parent, Parents Magazine and Canadian Family.Kolari's powerful parenting model is based on the neurobiology of love, teaching parents how to use compassion and empathy as powerful medicine to transform challenging behavior and build children's emotional resilience and emotional shock absorbers.Jennifer's wisdom, quick wit and down to earth style help parents navigate modern-day parenting problems, offering real-life examples as well as practical and effective tools and strategies.Her highly entertaining, inspiring workshops are shared with warmth and humour, making her a crowd-pleasing speaker with schools, medical professionals, corporations and agencies throughout North America, Europe and Asia.One of the nation's leading parenting experts, Jennifer Kolari, is a highly sought- after international speaker and the founder of Connected Parenting. A child and family therapist with a busy practice based in San Diego and Toronto, Kolari is also the author of Connected Parenting: How to Raise A Great Kid (Penguin Group USA and Penguin Canada, 2009) and You're Ruining My Life! (But Not Really): Surviving the Teenage Years with Connected Parenting (Penguin Canada, 2011).

Today we're talking about something that doesn't get nearly enough airtime: how older kids and adult children experience and process divorce. Whether they're in high school, college, or fully grown, your children still need you to show up as a parent. Today, I'm joined by the one and only Christina McGhee to unpack the complexities of divorcing when your kids aren't little anymore. In this episode we dig into why older kids are so often overlooked during divorce, what happens when they start naming the dysfunction you shielded them from, and how to support them without spiraling into guilt or defensiveness. Together, we explore how to navigate these pivotal moments with intention, compassion, and a deep respect for your child's experience. Here's what else we discuss in this episode: Why we sometimes overlook the needs of our older children during divorce (3:57) Advice and insights for parents of adult children navigating guilt over past family toxicity (21:52) Supporting adult children as they come to terms with the divorce and their childhood experiences (22:34) What to do when kids align with the abusive parent and you feel them slipping away (27:25) How to validate your child's experience without lying or vilifying the other parent (28:38) Learn more about Christina McGhee: Christina McGhee, MSW, is an internationally recognized divorce parenting expert, speaker, and author of the critically acclaimed book, PARENTING APART: How separated and divorced parents can raise happy and secure kids and the founder of divorceandchildren.com. Christina adamantly believes divorce doesn't have to equal devastation for families. While it is undeniably hard, with the right kind of information and support, she feels parents have the ability to be a child's absolute best resource when families change. Currently, she maintains a select coaching practice and runs a The Co-Parenting Specialist Certification Training Program that teaches divorce professionals how to keep kids in the center, not the middle, when parents part. She also continues to serves as the Education and Training Director for The SPLIT Outreach Project, a non-profit organization responsible for two unique and deeply moving documentaries, SPLIT: The EARLY Years and Split UP: the TEEN Years. These films offer a eye-opening look at how divorce impacts children's lives over time. Whether training, coaching or creating programs, Christina is passionate about disrupting the status quo, changing divorce for the better, and keeping the focus where it belongs… on kids. She has been featured on television, radio, podcasts, and in print around the US and abroad. A few places you may have seen her are TODAY Parents, NBC News, the BBC, The Times, and Parents Magazine. Christina and her husband live outside Houston, Texas, and are the proud parents of four "adultish" children (two bonus, two bio.) When she's not busy restoring order to the universe, Christina spends her time taking in sunsets, searching for the perfect cup of coffee, and ordering more books than she can read. Resources & Links:Kate on Instagram Kate on Facebook The Divorce Survival Guide Resource Bundle Focused Strategy Sessions with Kate Phoenix Rising: A Divorce Empowerment Collective Christina's websiteCo-parenting Specialist Training ProgramChristina on Instagram =================== DISCLAIMER:  THE COMMENTARY AND OPINIONS AVAILABLE ON THIS PODCAST ARE FOR INFORMATIONAL AND ENTERTAINMENT PURPOSES ONLY AND NOT FOR THE PURPOSE OF PROVIDING LEGAL OR PSYCHOLOGICAL ADVICE.  YOU SHOULD CONTACT AN ATTORNEY, COACH, OR THERAPIST IN YOUR STATE TO OBTAIN ADVICE WITH RESPECT TO ANY PARTICULAR ISSUE OR PROBLEM.

In this episode of the Connected Parenting Podcast, we're diving into two real-life listener questions as part of our Q&A series.First, we explore how to support an eight-year-old who has emotional outbursts in stores when they're told “no.” Why do these meltdowns happen, and how can we respond in ways that actually build emotional regulation instead of making things worse?Then we shift gears to talk about teens, specifically, what to do when your teenager refuses to go on family weekends or trips. We unpack the reasons behind this resistance, and how to balance empathy with boundaries while still keeping the family connection strong.These two scenarios may seem different, but at their core, both are about emotional regulation, autonomy, and how we show up as calm, connected leaders for our kids, even when things get heated or hard.Tune in to hear strategies, mindset shifts, and scripts you can start using right away to manage these tough parenting moments with more confidence and less stress.Jennifer's Takeaways:Addressing Tantrums in Young Children (15:35)Strategies for Managing Tantrums (15:47)Handling Teenage Refusals to Go Away with the Family (16:00)Maintaining Consistency and Confidence (16:12)Meet Jennifer KolariJennifer Kolari is the host of the “Connected Parenting” weekly podcast and the co-host of “The Mental Health Comedy” podcast. Kolari is a frequent guest on Nationwide morning shows and podcasts in th US and Canada. Her advice can also be found in many Canadian and US magazines such as; Today's Parent, Parents Magazine and Canadian Family.Kolari's powerful parenting model is based on the neurobiology of love, teaching parents how to use compassion and empathy as powerful medicine to transform challenging behavior and build children's emotional resilience and emotional shock absorbers.Jennifer's wisdom, quick wit and down to earth style help parents navigate modern-day parenting problems, offering real-life examples as well as practical and effective tools and strategies.Her highly entertaining, inspiring workshops are shared with warmth and humour, making her a crowd-pleasing speaker with schools, medical professionals, corporations and agencies throughout North America, Europe and Asia.One of the nation's leading parenting experts, Jennifer Kolari, is a highly sought- after international speaker and the founder of Connected Parenting. A child and family therapist with a busy practice based in San Diego and Toronto, Kolari is also the author of Connected Parenting: How to Raise A Great Kid (Penguin Group USA and Penguin Canada, 2009) and You're Ruining My Life! (But Not Really): Surviving the Teenage Years with Connected Parenting (Penguin Canada, 2011).

The balance between guidance and freedom helps children develop emotional strength, problem-solving skills, and a deeper sense of self. While today's kids have endless access to information, what many lack is the freedom to explore, try, fail, and figure things out on their own.Whether your child is a toddler or a teen, this episode will give you practical and compassionate guidance on building independence in ways that feel safe and supportive for both of you.Tune in and rediscover the magic of letting go just enough to help your child grow. Jennifer's Takeaways:Building Independence in Children (00:00)Challenges of Modern Parenting (01:55)Encouraging Age-Appropriate Responsibilities (05:08)Age-Appropriate Privileges and Problem-Solving (08:57)Balancing Protection and Independence (13:05)Meet Jennifer KolariJennifer Kolari is the host of the “Connected Parenting” weekly podcast and the co-host of “The Mental Health Comedy” podcast. Kolari is a frequent guest on Nationwide morning shows and podcasts in th US and Canada. Her advice can also be found in many Canadian and US magazines such as; Today's Parent, Parents Magazine and Canadian Family.Kolari's powerful parenting model is based on the neurobiology of love, teaching parents how to use compassion and empathy as powerful medicine to transform challenging behavior and build children's emotional resilience and emotional shock absorbers.Jennifer's wisdom, quick wit and down to earth style help parents navigate modern-day parenting problems, offering real-life examples as well as practical and effective tools and strategies.Her highly entertaining, inspiring workshops are shared with warmth and humour, making her a crowd-pleasing speaker with schools, medical professionals, corporations and agencies throughout North America, Europe and Asia.One of the nation's leading parenting experts, Jennifer Kolari, is a highly sought- after international speaker and the founder of Connected Parenting. A child and family therapist with a busy practice based in San Diego and Toronto, Kolari is also the author of Connected Parenting: How to Raise A Great Kid (Penguin Group USA and Penguin Canada, 2009) and You're Ruining My Life! (But Not Really): Surviving the Teenage Years with Connected Parenting (Penguin Canada, 2011).

In this week's episode of Connected Parenting, we're diving into one of the most common and exhausting parenting struggles—clothing battles, especially with younger girls.You know the drill: “There's nothing to wear!” “I hate that shirt!” “Not those pants!”and it all happens before you've even had your coffee.Today we are exploring the emotional undercurrents behind these morning meltdowns, looking closer at why seemingly simple decisions like getting dressed can turn into full-blown power struggles, and most importantly, how you can shift the energy and reclaim calm in your mornings.If getting dressed feels like a daily disaster, this episode will help you bring more empathy, structure, and peace to your morning routine.Spoiler: It's not about the outfit—it's about connection.Jennifer's Takeaways:Clothing Battles in Young Girls (00:00)Reasons Behind Clothing Battles (01:20)Strategies to Prevent Clothing Battles (02:46)Practical Tips for Managing Clothing Battles (05:59)Addressing Anxiety and Control Issues (08:05)Handling Extreme Cases and School Anxiety (09:16)Meet Jennifer KolariJennifer Kolari is the host of the “Connected Parenting” weekly podcast and the co-host of “The Mental Health Comedy” podcast. Kolari is a frequent guest on Nationwide morning shows and podcasts in th US and Canada. Her advice can also be found in many Canadian and US magazines such as; Today's Parent, Parents Magazine and Canadian Family.Kolari's powerful parenting model is based on the neurobiology of love, teaching parents how to use compassion and empathy as powerful medicine to transform challenging behavior and build children's emotional resilience and emotional shock absorbers.Jennifer's wisdom, quick wit and down to earth style help parents navigate modern-day parenting problems, offering real-life examples as well as practical and effective tools and strategies.Her highly entertaining, inspiring workshops are shared with warmth and humour, making her a crowd-pleasing speaker with schools, medical professionals, corporations and agencies throughout North America, Europe and Asia.One of the nation's leading parenting experts, Jennifer Kolari, is a highly sought- after international speaker and the founder of Connected Parenting. A child and family therapist with a busy practice based in San Diego and Toronto, Kolari is also the author of Connected Parenting: How to Raise A Great Kid (Penguin Group USA and Penguin Canada, 2009) and You're Ruining My Life! (But Not Really): Surviving the Teenage Years with Connected Parenting (Penguin Canada, 2011).

Welcome back, connected parents! In this heartfelt episode of Connected Parenting, we're diving into one of the most emotionally challenging moments many parents face; the shift that happens when your child starts to pull away and step into the world of adolescence. I take a close look at this transition, especially between mothers and daughters, when the once chatty, affectionate little girl becomes more withdrawn, independent, and focused on her peers. For many parents, this change feels like a form of grief—there's a sadness, a sense of being left behind, and a deep questioning of where they now fit in their child's life.Full of empathy and grounded in practical advice, this episode offers strategies to stay close, even as the relationship begins to change. Whether you're in the thick of it or seeing the early signs, today's episode will help you navigate this season of change with compassion and clarity.Remember just because it feels different doesn't mean you're losing your child. You're simply being invited to show up for them in a new way.Jennifer's Takeaways:Understanding the Transition to Teenagehood (00:00)Biological and Cultural Context of Adolescence (02:21)Emotional Impact on Parents and Teenagers (06:23)Navigating Social Interactions and Connections (07:20)Effective Communication and Connection Techniques (15:40)Managing Expectations and Emotional Resilience (15:56)Meet Jennifer KolariJennifer Kolari is the host of the “Connected Parenting” weekly podcast and the co-host of “The Mental Health Comedy” podcast. Kolari is a frequent guest on Nationwide morning shows and podcasts in th US and Canada. Her advice can also be found in many Canadian and US magazines such as; Today's Parent, Parents Magazine and Canadian Family.Kolari's powerful parenting model is based on the neurobiology of love, teaching parents how to use compassion and empathy as powerful medicine to transform challenging behavior and build children's emotional resilience and emotional shock absorbers.Jennifer's wisdom, quick wit and down to earth style help parents navigate modern-day parenting problems, offering real-life examples as well as practical and effective tools and strategies.Her highly entertaining, inspiring workshops are shared with warmth and humour, making her a crowd-pleasing speaker with schools, medical professionals, corporations and agencies throughout North America, Europe and Asia.One of the nation's leading parenting experts, Jennifer Kolari, is a highly sought- after international speaker and the founder of Connected Parenting. A child and family therapist with a busy practice based in San Diego and Toronto, Kolari is also the author of Connected Parenting: How to Raise A Great Kid (Penguin Group USA and Penguin Canada, 2009) and You're Ruining My Life! (But Not Really): Surviving the Teenage Years with Connected Parenting (Penguin Canada, 2011).

In this episode of Connected Parenting, we're tackling one of the most frustrating challenges for parents: time blindness. You know the scene; your child is moving at a snail's pace, one leg in their pants, completely unaware of the ticking clock while you're shouting, “Let's go!”Time blindness is a very real neurological issue for many kids and teens, especially those who are highly sensitive, neurodivergent, or struggle with executive functioning. They don't mean to frustrate you—they're just wired differently when it comes to sensing and managing time.If mornings, transitions, and deadlines feel like constant battles, this episode will help you understand the root cause—and guide you toward more peaceful, productive days.Jennifer's Takeaways:Understanding Time Blindness in Children (00:00)The Role of the Frontal Lobe in Time Management (02:39)Consequences of Time Blindness (08:53)Strategies for Managing Time Blindness (11:38)Practical Tips for Improving Time Management (17:29)Seeking Professional Help (20:09)Meet Jennifer KolariJennifer Kolari is the host of the “Connected Parenting” weekly podcast and the co-host of “The Mental Health Comedy” podcast. Kolari is a frequent guest on Nationwide morning shows and podcasts in th US and Canada. Her advice can also be found in many Canadian and US magazines such as; Today's Parent, Parents Magazine and Canadian Family.Kolari's powerful parenting model is based on the neurobiology of love, teaching parents how to use compassion and empathy as powerful medicine to transform challenging behavior and build children's emotional resilience and emotional shock absorbers.Jennifer's wisdom, quick wit and down to earth style help parents navigate modern-day parenting problems, offering real-life examples as well as practical and effective tools and strategies.Her highly entertaining, inspiring workshops are shared with warmth and humour, making her a crowd-pleasing speaker with schools, medical professionals, corporations and agencies throughout North America, Europe and Asia.One of the nation's leading parenting experts, Jennifer Kolari, is a highly sought- after international speaker and the founder of Connected Parenting. A child and family therapist with a busy practice based in San Diego and Toronto, Kolari is also the author of Connected Parenting: How to Raise A Great Kid (Penguin Group USA and Penguin Canada, 2009) and You're Ruining My Life! (But Not Really): Surviving the Teenage Years with Connected Parenting (Penguin Canada, 2011).

Notes and Links to Emely Rumble's Work          Emely Rumble, LCSW, is a distinguished licensed clinical social worker, school social worker, and seasoned biblio/psychotherapist with over 14 years of professional experience. Committed to making mental health services more accessible, Emely specializes in the transformative practice of bibliotherapy. Passionate about advocating for the integration of creative arts in psychotherapy, mental well-being, and self-improvement, Emely champions the social model of disability and embraces a neurodiversity-affirming therapeutic approach. A distinguished member of The National Association of Poetry Therapy, Emely's work has been featured in respected publications such as Parents Magazine, ‘School Library Journal', Bold Journey Magazine, BronxNet News, and The Bronx Is Reading. Emely shares her expertise beyond traditional avenues through @Literapy_NYC, her dedicated platform on Instagram, TikTok, and Podia, where she provides valuable educational content. Having earned her undergraduate degree from Mount Holyoke College and completed her social work degree at Smith College School for Social Work, Emely resides in the Bronx with her husband, two children, and her psychiatric service dog, Montana. She embodies a holistic and compassionate approach to mental health and well-being. Buy Bibliotherapy in the Bronx   Emely's Website     At about 2:10, Emely talks about the work and process involved as the book is about to be published At about 3:20, Emely talks about early feedback and her dynamic audiobook At about 4:35, Emely gives a brief summary of the book and talks about where to buy the book and where to find her online At about 10:30, Emely talks about “escapism” and “realism” and  At about 13:50, Emely responds to Pete's question about her reading of the Bible and connections to her grandmother as a healer and a Christian At about 17:15, Maya Angelou, Sister Souljah are among those Emely shouts out as formative and transformative writers, especially in her “adultified” youth At about 20:30, The two fanboy/girl about Maya Angelou and I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings At about 21:30, bell hooks, Audre Lorde, Alexis Gumbs are cited as some inspiring writers for Emely At about 24:40, Emely responds to Pete's questions about the pivotal reading from her grandmother's funeral and seeds for the book; she also shouts out a great editor in Nirmala Nataraj At about 29:25, Natalie Gutierrez and her foreword are discussed-books as “communal medicine” At about 30:30, Emely responds to Pete's questions about bibliotherapy and the intellect and the heart in concert At about 32:35, Emely responds to Pete's questions about what she learned from her aunt's schizophrenia and the ways in which she was treated and ideas of community and racism  At about 38:20, Emely gives background on early days of implementing bibliotherapy with patients and more connections to her aunt At about 44:20, Ned Ashton and Sonny Corinthos shout outs! At about 45:15, Pete asks Emely to define/describe bibliotherapy At about 45:50, The two discuss the great Ms. Parkins and Strega Nona and fairy tales and how “childish” books can work so well with adults  At about 50:30, Making a Godfather II reference (obvi), Pete asks about Emely's view on fiction and nonfiction and narratives in prescribing her books; Emely cites an interesting mindset of books as “mirrors, windows, and sliding glass doors,” as posited by Dr. Rudine Sims Bishop At about 57:10, Emely responds to Pete's question about what a successful nonfiction prescription  At about 1:00:50, Emely talks about intake for bibliotherapy  At about 1:01:40, The two discuss Andrew Carnegie and problematic authors  At about 1:05:35, Mayte and her story that involves emotional resonance and intersectionality is discussed  At about 1:07:40, Emely expands on ideas of learning and empathy that happen with therapists and clients At about 1:13:00, Dr. Sadie P. Delaney is shouted out by Emely Rumble as a hero whom she learned about in her book research-The “Godmother of Bibliotherapy”    You can now subscribe to the podcast on Apple Podcasts, and leave a five-star review. You can also ask for the podcast by name using Alexa, and find the pod on Stitcher, Spotify, and on Amazon Music. Follow Pete on IG, where he's @chillsatwillpodcast, or on Twitter, where he's @chillsatwillpo1. You can watch other episodes on YouTube-watch and subscribe to The Chills at Will Podcast Channel. Please subscribe to both the YouTube Channel and the podcast while you're checking out this episode.       Pete is very excited to have one or two podcast episodes per month featured on the website of Chicago Review of Books. The audio will be posted, along with a written interview culled from the audio. His conversation with Episode 270 guest Jason De León is up on the website this week. A big thanks to Rachel León and Michael Welch at Chicago Review.     Sign up now for The Chills at Will Podcast Patreon: it can be found at patreon.com/chillsatwillpodcastpeterriehl      Check out the page that describes the benefits of a Patreon membership, including cool swag and bonus episodes. Thanks in advance for supporting his one-man show, his DIY podcast and his extensive reading, research, editing, and promoting to keep this independent podcast pumping out high-quality content!    This month's Patreon bonus episode will feature an exploration of the wonderful poetry of Khalil Gibran. Pete has added a $1 a month tier for “Well-Wishers” and Cheerleaders of the Show.    This is a passion project, a DIY operation, and Pete would love for your help in promoting what he's convinced is a unique and spirited look at an often-ignored art form.    The intro song for The Chills at Will Podcast is “Wind Down” (Instrumental Version), and the other song played on this episode was “Hoops” (Instrumental)” by Matt Weidauer, and both songs are used through ArchesAudio.com.     Please tune in for Episode 283 with Jason Bailey, a film critic, author, and podcaster whose work has appeared in The New York Times, Vulture, Vice, Rolling Stone, and Slate, among others. He is the editor-in-chief of Crooked Marquee, and the author of five books. The episode goes live this evening, April 29, which is also Pub Day for his exciting new book, Gandolfini, about the legendary actor, James Gandolfini.  

In today's episode of the Connected Parenting Podcast, we're diving into a scenario that leaves so many parents scratching their heads — the child who's perfect at school but melts down at home.You know the story: your child is polite, focused, and adored by teachers, but the second they walk through your front door, it's like a switch flips. Suddenly, you're dealing with tantrums, defiance, or emotional outbursts and you're left wondering, why am I getting the worst while everyone else gets the best?If you've ever felt like your child gives their best to the world and their worst to you—this conversation will offer clarity, comfort, and actionable tools so you can navigate this tricky dynamic with confidence and connection.Jennifer's Takeaways:Kids Who Excel at School but Misbehave at Home (00:00)Understanding the Behavior of "Gladiator Kids" (02:31)Sensitivity and Emotional Regulation in Children (04:14)Anxiety and Reactive Behavior in Children (06:58)Strategies for Managing Behavior at Home (10:04)Connecting Before Correcting and Bonding with Children (14:46)The Role of Consistency and Predictability in Parenting (17:17)Resources and Support for Parents (17:50)The Importance of Understanding Neuro Spicy Kids (18:23)Meet Jennifer KolariJennifer Kolari is the host of the “Connected Parenting” weekly podcast and the co-host of “The Mental Health Comedy” podcast. Kolari is a frequent guest on Nationwide morning shows and podcasts in th US and Canada. Her advice can also be found in many Canadian and US magazines such as; Today's Parent, Parents Magazine and Canadian Family.Kolari's powerful parenting model is based on the neurobiology of love, teaching parents how to use compassion and empathy as powerful medicine to transform challenging behavior and build children's emotional resilience and emotional shock absorbers.Jennifer's wisdom, quick wit and down to earth style help parents navigate modern-day parenting problems, offering real-life examples as well as practical and effective tools and strategies.Her highly entertaining, inspiring workshops are shared with warmth and humour, making her a crowd-pleasing speaker with schools, medical professionals, corporations and agencies throughout North America, Europe and Asia.One of the nation's leading parenting experts, Jennifer Kolari, is a highly sought- after international speaker and the founder of Connected Parenting. A child and family therapist with a busy practice based in San Diego and Toronto, Kolari is also the author of Connected Parenting: How to Raise A Great Kid (Penguin Group USA and Penguin Canada, 2009) and You're Ruining My Life! (But Not Really): Surviving the Teenage Years with Connected Parenting (Penguin Canada, 2011).

Parent coach Oona Hanson joins us to discuss how going to a physical therapist for back pain led her down a wellness-culture rabbit hole, why dietary restrictions to “fight inflammation” just ended up harming her relationship with food and her body, how she got the dubious diagnosis of “adrenal fatigue,” and more. Behind the paywall, we get into how she helped her child heal from an eating disorder (and how that process changed the course of her career), how parents can help their kids navigate pressures from diet and wellness culture, why smart and science-minded people can still fall for wellness misinformation, her experience with perimenopause and wellness culture, and more. This episode is cross-posted from our other podcast, Rethinking Wellness. Paid subscribers can hear the full interview, and the first half is available to all listeners. To upgrade to paid, go to rethinkingwellness.substack.com. Oona Hanson is a nationally recognized parent coach who supports families navigating diet culture and eating disorders. She is passionate about helping parents raise kids who have a healthy relationship with food and their body. A regular contributor to CNN, Oona has been featured widely, including on Good Morning America, The Washington Post, USA Today, US News & World Report, People, and Parents Magazine. Oona holds a Master's Degree in Educational Psychology and a Master's Degree in English. She writes the Parenting Without Diet Culture newsletter and will publish her first book in 2026 with Cambridge University Press. She is a mother of two and lives in Los Angeles. Find her at oonahanson.substack.com. Check out Christy's three books, Anti-Diet, The Wellness Trap, and The Emotional Eating, Chronic Dieting, Binge Eating & Body Image Workbook for a deeper dive into the topics covered on the pod. If you're ready to break free from diet culture and make peace with food, come check out Christy's Intuitive Eating Fundamentals online course. For more critical thinking and compassionate skepticism about wellness and diet culture, check out Christy's Rethinking Wellness podcast! You can also sign up to get it in your inbox every week at rethinkingwellness.substack.com. Ask a question about diet and wellness culture, disordered-eating recovery, and the anti-diet approach for a chance to have it answered on Rethinking Wellness. You can also subscribe to the Food Psych Weekly newsletter to check out previous answers!

In this conversation, Nina and Dr. Melanie McNally discuss the complexities of adolescence, focusing on emotional regulation, the impact of childhood experiences, and the importance of fostering independence in teens. They explore how early communication about emotions can shape a child's ability to cope as they grow, and provide practical advice for parents on how to support their children through these critical developmental stages. In this conversation, Dr. Melanie McNally discusses the challenges of parenting teens, focusing on the balance between granting independence and maintaining boundaries. She emphasizes the importance of logical consequences, scaffolding, and emotional awareness in helping teens navigate social pressures and develop resilience. The discussion also highlights the significance of open communication and creating a safe space for teens to express their feelings, especially regarding peer influence and emotional health. 00:00: Navigating Troubled Teen Years 02:02: Understanding Adolescent Psychology 04:24: The Impact of Childhood on Teen Emotions 09:29: Building Emotional Awareness in Children 16:55: Fostering Independence and Critical Thinking in Teens 22:25: Navigating Teen Independence and Boundaries 28:56: Coping with Social Pressures and Expectations 33:19: Understanding Emotional Contagion and Peer Influence 38:51: Processing Emotions and Building Resilience Dr. Melanie McNally is a licensed clinical psychologist and brain coach who helps people maximize their potential so they get the most out of life. From adolescents struggling with motivation to executives seeking direction, she helps people feel less overwhelmed, figure out their next steps, and reach meaningful goals. Dr. Melanie has worked in the field of psychology since 2005 and has written two books, The Emotionally Intelligent Teen and Helping Your Unmotivated Teen. Recognized nationally for her expertise, Dr. Melanie has been invited to the White House to discuss the paramount importance of teen mental health. She's appeared in The Huffington Post, Parents Magazine, Business Insider, Fast Company, and more. Episode Sponsor: Visit activeskinrepair.com  to learn more about Active Skin Repair and to get 20% off your order, use code: MAMAKNOWS New customers can enjoy this special offer of only $1.99 a meal. Go to everyplate.com/podcast and use code mamaknows199 to get started. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

“Feeding my baby” is one of the top search topics on Google. On this special bonus episode, we cover the milestone stages of feeding - from baby's first moments to the toddler years - with Dr. Mona Amin, pediatrician, board certified lactation consultant and the founder of of PedsDocTalk. Whether it's breastfeeding, introducing solids or food allergies…it seems like every stage of feeding our kids comes with challenges and stress. Tune in as we explore all the common difficulties of each stage and offer great solutions!    Dr. Mona Amin / YouTube / FB / IG / TikTok Dr. Mona is a pediatrician, board certified lactation consultant, and the founder of PedsDocTalk, a global  platform with almost a million followers. A mom of two, her no-nonsense, “evidence-based” approach to child health has been featured in the New York Times, Parents Magazine and more.   Dr. Mona has been a practicing pediatrician since 2015 and an IBCLC (Certified Lactation Consultant) since 2021. She attended UCLA for undergraduate training, attended ATSU-SOMA medical school to become a Doctor of Osteopathic Medicine, and completed pediatric residency training at the Bernard and Millie Duker Children's Hospital in Albany, New York. You can also watch this podcast on YouTube / @munchkin and reach us at podcast@munchkin.com.  StrollerCoaster: A Parenting Podcast is created by Munchkin Inc., the most loved baby lifestyle brand in the world.  You can find all your favorite Munchkin products, including the new Flow Nipple Shield +, at https://www.munchkin.com.     Follow Munchkin on Instagram / Facebook / Pinterest / TikTok  Trees for the Future  

This is a free preview of a paid episode. To hear more, visit rethinkingwellness.substack.comParent coach Oona Hanson joins us to discuss how going to a physical therapist for back pain led her down a wellness-culture rabbit hole, why dietary restrictions to “fight inflammation” just ended up harming her relationship with food and her body, how she got the dubious diagnosis of “adrenal fatigue,” and more. Behind the paywall, we get into how she helped her child heal from an eating disorder (and how that process changed the course of her career), how parents can help their kids navigate pressures from diet and wellness culture, why smart and science-minded people can still fall for wellness misinformation, her experience with perimenopause and wellness culture, and more.Paid subscribers can hear the full interview, and the first half is available to all listeners. To upgrade to paid, go to rethinkingwellness.substack.com.Oona Hanson is a nationally recognized parent coach who supports families navigating diet culture and eating disorders. She is passionate about helping parents raise kids who have a healthy relationship with food and their body. A regular contributor to CNN, Oona has been featured widely, including on Good Morning America, The Washington Post, USA Today, US News & World Report, People, and Parents Magazine. Oona holds a Master's Degree in Educational Psychology and a Master's Degree in English. She writes the Parenting Without Diet Culture newsletter and will publish her first book in 2026 with Cambridge University Press. She is a mother of two and lives in Los Angeles. Find her at oonahanson.substack.com.If you like this conversation, subscribe to hear lots more like it!Support the podcast by becoming a paid subscriber, and unlock great perks like extended interviews, subscriber-only Q&As, full access to our archives, commenting privileges and subscriber threads where you can connect with other listeners, and more. Learn more and sign up at rethinkingwellness.substack.com.Christy's second book, The Wellness Trap, is available wherever books are sold! Order it here, or ask for it in your favorite local bookstore. If you're looking to make peace with food and break free from diet and wellness culture, come check out Christy's Intuitive Eating Fundamentals online course.

Seasonal transitions; particularly spring can deeply affect highly sensitive or as I like to call them "neuro-spicy" kids.While spring brings feelings of renewal and excitement for many, the change in routine, environment, and even the weather can be incredibly dysregulating for children with big feelings. These transitions can create emotional turbulence, behavioral flare-ups, and increased anxiety if not handled with care.Whether it's adjusting to daylight saving time, the end of the school year, or just shifting from winter into warmer days, this episode will help you support your child through it all with empathy, structure, and the CALM Connected Parenting method of connection.Tune in now for practical tips and support in helping things run as smoothly as possible.Jennifer's Takeaways:Spring Transitions and Highly Sensitive Kids (00:00)The Impact of State Changes on the Brain (02:08)Seasonal Changes and Behavioral Issues (04:10)Strategies for Managing Spring Transitions (06:44)Addressing Sleep and Clothing Issues (10:02)Maintaining a Positive Outlook (12:15)Meet Jennifer KolariJennifer Kolari is the host of the “Connected Parenting” weekly podcast and the co-host of “The Mental Health Comedy” podcast. Kolari is a frequent guest on Nationwide morning shows and podcasts in th US and Canada. Her advice can also be found in many Canadian and US magazines such as; Today's Parent, Parents Magazine and Canadian Family.Kolari's powerful parenting model is based on the neurobiology of love, teaching parents how to use compassion and empathy as powerful medicine to transform challenging behavior and build children's emotional resilience and emotional shock absorbers.Jennifer's wisdom, quick wit and down to earth style help parents navigate modern-day parenting problems, offering real-life examples as well as practical and effective tools and strategies.Her highly entertaining, inspiring workshops are shared with warmth and humour, making her a crowd-pleasing speaker with schools, medical professionals, corporations and agencies throughout North America, Europe and Asia.One of the nation's leading parenting experts, Jennifer Kolari, is a highly sought- after international speaker and the founder of Connected Parenting. A child and family therapist with a busy practice based in San Diego and Toronto, Kolari is also the author of Connected Parenting: How to Raise A Great Kid (Penguin Group USA and Penguin Canada, 2009) and You're Ruining My Life! (But Not Really): Surviving the Teenage Years with Connected Parenting (Penguin Canada, 2011).

Dani Klein Modisett is the Founder/CEO of the award-winning company bringing comic relief to those facing Alzheimer's, Laughter On Call. LOC was launched to help her mother who became depressed facing the disease. In the ensuing 6 years the company has grown to help all people feeling isolated. To date it has trained thousands of caregivers and worked with over 600 companies around the world including META, Amazon, Capital One, Bristol Myers and FEMA. LOC has been featured in The Washington Post, The London Times, The NY Times and AARP Magazine. Dani is also a comedian/actor and author of the books, “Afterbirth: stories you won't read in a parenting magazine (St. Martin's Press) “Take My Spouse, Please.” (Penguin Random House) a part-memoir, part how-to for creating shared laughter to keep your marriage happy and healthy. Dani taught Stand-Up at UCLA for 10 years and has coached keynote speakers, business leaders, and Congressional candidates to use more humor in their communication. She has been a keynote speaker at Women's Business Enterprise National Council, Dartmouth Entrepreneur Forum, CALA, ICAA and UCLA. She has run workshops at Stanford, MIT, Columbia, Duke's Fuqua and Harvard Business School where Laughter On Call is currently a case study. Her writing has appeared in AARP, NY Times, LA Times, Parents Magazine and many websites. Her many podcast appearances include Stanford's “When I'm 64,” and “The Tony Robbins Podcast.” Before becoming an entrepreneur, Dani was an actor who appeared on Broadway and many TV shows including “Law & Order,” “The Lottery,” and “Las Vegas,” for NBC. She was listed in Forbes 50>50 in 2023.    Dani Klein Modisett  Laughter On Call  Founder/CEO (213) 840-6798   Named Forbes 50 over 50   Author Take My Spouse, Please 

Welcome to another episode of "Dishing with Stephanie's Dish," the podcast for everyone obsessed with food, cookbooks, and the stories they tell. Today, host Stephanie Hansen sits down with Jenna Helwig —a true powerhouse in the cookbook world. You may know Jenna as the creator of the Cookbookery Collective newsletter but she's also the food director at Real Simple magazine and a prolific cookbook author herself. In this conversation, Stephanie and Jenna dive into their mutual love for cookbooks, discuss the enduring charm of print in a digital world, and explore the evolving landscape of cookbook publishing, from celebrity chefs to everyday cooks and influencers.Jenna shares insights from her career, talks about the resurgence and diversity of cookbooks, and lets us in on what it's like to balance her editorial roles at Real Simple and her Substack. They chat about memorable cookbooks from childhood, the pressure (and freedom) of home cooking, and the unique joys of discovering new recipes and makers. Whether you're a cookbook collector, home cook, or just love a good food story, this episode is packed with inspiration, nostalgia, and plenty of practical wisdom. So grab your favorite cookbook, get comfy, and join us for a delicious discussion!FULL EPISODE TRANSCRIPT FOLLOWS:Stephanie Hansen:Hello, everybody, and welcome to @DishingwithStephaniesDish, the podcast where we talk to people that are obsessed with food, cookbooks, and all things in the food space. And today, I'm speaking with Jenna Helwig, and I kinda came across her mostly on Substack, which I think maybe will make her be surprised. I found her as the creator of the cookbookery collective cookbook newsletter, and I was like, hey. You're into cookbooks. I'm into cookbooks. Let's talk about cookbooks. And we got the call set up, and then she said, oh, and by the way, I am the food director of Real Simple magazine. And I was like, oh, just that small detail that I literally did not even know about you.I'm so embarrassed. Welcome to the program.Jenna Helwig:Thank you so much. Thanks for having me. And I'm thrilled that you found me through the substack because that's a newish thing for me, and I love that, you know, people are reading it.Stephanie Hansen:Yes. And I was so like, I'm just obsessed with cookbooks, and I am a cookbook writer. I'm on my second book that's coming up, and I read a lot about trying to get published and different points of view of cookbooks. And we have quite a few good cookbook authors that hail from the Midwest in the Twin Cities here. And you had, I think, done an interview with my friend Zoe from Zoey Bakes, which probably is how I found out about you.Jenna Helwig:That is probably right. Yes. Zoey. Also, I think of Amy Theilan. I know she's not right there, but she's, you know, in the vicinity. Right? So yeah. For sure. And Pinch of Yum, aren't they based in Minneapolis? So yeah.Jenna Helwig:They are. A good a good food thing going.Stephanie Hansen:Yes. And the Food Dolls just published their book. They have, like, 8,000,000 followers.Jenna Helwig:Amazing. I guess I've been through that interview. Yeah. And who is that?Stephanie Hansen:Sarah Kiefer, do you know her?Jenna Helwig:Oh, yes. Of course. Her cookies, baked goods. Yeah.Stephanie Hansen:Yeah. We are all from, the Twin Cities, and most of them have, like, specialty angles. Like, I am just a home cook, so that's sort of my point of view on the Midwest. But it has been a really great market to be in. And one of the things that I started a radio show about seventeen years ago, so we've talked a lot of these people along the way. And right when we started the radio show, you know, Facebook and Instagram were launching, and it's been such an interesting trajectory to see cookbook authors in particular. And, like, everyone's like, oh, print is dead. Like, magazines are dead.Publications are dead. And yet, you know, cookbooks are, in some respects, doing better than ever.Jenna Helwig:Yeah. I agree. I feel like they are thriving. I also feel like, you know, at least for me personally, and I do notice this though with a lot of other people that we are on our screens all the time, and we're kinda tired of it. So whether it's a cookbook or even a print magazine, like, there's just something so lovely about turning pages, just, like, shutting out everything else. No other notifications are popping up on your screen. So print is very special.Stephanie Hansen:Yeah. And it feels like you can have, like, personal one on one time with it because you can set your phone down and really immerse yourself in the story.Jenna Helwig:Yes. Exactly. We all need more of that.Stephanie Hansen:I think so. My food magazines too, you mentioned that you're the food director of Real Simple, and you guys are having your twenty fifth anniversary. Yes. And I literally before you sent me that text, I was, like, reading it. And I'm a subscriber, so I'm gonna hold up my copy here. Because I really I love food print too. I worked in the newspaper business, and I'm kind of a tactile print person also. And you had a really cool feature this month about what's the best takeaway you've ever gotten from Real Simple because you guys are in your 25th birthday. So I thought I'd ask you what your best takeaway is.Jenna Helwig:Oh my gosh. That's such a hard question. Alright. I I'm sure it's going to be food related, and I'm kinda gonna cheat and pick something from that month. I worked with Molly Ye on the beautiful birthday cake that's on the cover. And, you know, one of the things she did that I feel like I've used in other in other applications, but never for frosting, was she used instead of food coloring, freeze dried raspberry powder to make the beautiful pink frosting. And I just hadn't done that before, and it was so easy and such a kind of natural way to make something look so lovely.Stephanie Hansen:Yeah. That's funny because, yeah, and the cake, it's a it's a lemon poppy seed cake, and then it has like a a raspberry pink frosting on the outside and then raspberry jam on the inside. It really it also gives you a little bit of that raspberry flavor in the frosting, but it's not like super wet like it would be if you used real raspberries or also, like, super overly sweet if you used just jam.Jenna Helwig:You know what? That is exactly right because it lends that little bit of tartness to it too, and so it's just such a nicely balanced frosting.Stephanie Hansen:So you are a cookbook writer yourself.Jenna Helwig:Mhmm.Stephanie Hansen:I'm forgetting the name of your books. It's Minute Dinners or Dinner andJenna Helwig:“Bare Minimum Dinners.” The most Bare minimum. Yes. “Bare Minimum Dinners”. Stephanie Hansen:I'm all for that. And you've had, a number of cookbooks, I think. Aren't you? Like, you've had a few more of that too.Jenna Helwig:Yes. So I've written five books. Three of them were more in the, like, family baby toddler space. I used to be the food editor at Parents Magazine. Sure. And so that was really how I kind of got into cookbook writing. I started with real baby food and then wrote one called baby led feeding. And I will say that is by far my best selling cookbook.Jenna Helwig:You know, it's still something we actually did a reissue a couple of years ago, so I did an updated version. It's still something that parents are finding, and that just makes me so happy.Stephanie Hansen:My neighbor who just had a baby, she's gonna be two, was obsessed with that book because I just she knows I write cookbooks, and I film a TV show in my house too. So I'm always bringing them food. And when she first had the baby, she showed it to me, and she was like, have you ever heard of this book?Jenna Helwig:And it was yours. Oh my gosh. That's amazing. Well, that's so great. I'm I that's a really hard time of life as I you know, just, like, trying to figure out no one really tells you how to feed your baby, which is strange. And so I think anything that I could do to make it just less stressful, that was always my goal with those books.Stephanie Hansen:And I think that there's so much to be said about just getting dinner on the table. Like, it's almost a political act these days just to, like, be working, be taking care of your mental health, be worrying about your social time with your kids, your family, your family, aging parents, and then all of a sudden every day someone is supposed to, like, be putting all these elaborate meals on the table, like, sometimes just even surviving a day without the food, and then you have this whole other stressor on top of it.Jenna Helwig:I could not agree more. I mean, which is why I thought of bare minimum dinners. Like, it's this idea, and we do this also in real simple. You know, it's very similar. They're like I call fussy the f word. I'm like, nothing fussy, you know, especially when we're talking about recipes in the magazine. Skip the garnish. Like, you know, there's you're not putting on a show for anyone.You know? Just do what you can. That's really you know? But is it better or good is better than perfect. Done is better than perfect. Just get it done.Stephanie Hansen:And some people, like, because they feel like they're trying to live up to something in a Instagram photo, it prevents them from having a dinner party or, making food for a neighbor because maybe it's, like, not good enough. You know, just the sheer act of eating and providing food for your family, whoever your family looks like, or even just for yourself, you are gonna eat better. You're gonna have more control over what you eat. I have eaten at a million restaurants in my life, and I just find that I always feel so much better when I'm cooking at home.Jenna Helwig:I agree. I love to go out to eat. However, then if if I do that too much, I'm like, okay. I just need to reset at home. And, you know, I've also noticed that in some cookbooks, there has been this trend towards the food not being overly styled or the author doing that themselves and thinking about, like, Julia Tershen with her last book. You know, she photographed that herself, and the food looks great, but also real.Like, you could do it. And, also the book Chinese Enough that I just featured in Cookbookery Collective. You know, those recipes just don't feel like nitpicked to death. You know? They're just very naturalStephanie Hansen:looking. I feel like we might see more of that. I photographed my own book, but it was simply out of necessity because I didn't have $20 to pay someone. So I said to the publisher, well, if my Instagram's okay, I'm gonna do, like, similar to that. Is that okay? And they were like, sure. Oh, great. As we look at cookbooks as a genre, things have changed a lot because it used to be that you were a professional chef or you were a restaurant chef and you were writing about your restaurant or you were a small group of people that were super experienced in cooking, and maybe you had, you know, 10 books that you were writing in the different genres. You did vegetarian and gluten free and then dairy free.Now, like, the cookbook space is really kind of being taken up by regular people or influencers in a lot of respects. Does that, open the door for more excitement or is it sometimes do you worry that maybe the books aren't as good? Oh,Jenna Helwig:Oh, that's a tough question. I think that anything that gets people cooking is good. So I am you know, if the it is someone without a lot of cooking experience who has a book, but it still excites people to get into the kitchen, fantastic. So that's really my main goal. I do think, you know, where I am in my life, like, I really wanna learn something new from a cookbook. So that's what I personally am looking for, but there are cooks of all different, you know, ability levels and experience levels. So I think that having a variety of cookbooks that can reach everyone where they are is probably the answer.Stephanie Hansen:There is so much diversity too in cookbooks now. Like, the no offense to the old beautiful Asian cookbooks that you would get, but, you know, you didn't really feel like you could make a lot of the things out of there because maybe you didn't have the ingredients or you weren't familiar with technique. The the more recent diversity in cookbooks, it feels like you can actually make some of these things.Jenna Helwig:Well, I think that's right. Some of the things do feel more accessible. And, also, we just have access to so many more ingredients now, which is amazing. Just even at, like, regular grocery stores. My parents live in Colorado and, like, in the suburbs, and I was, you know, just driving by where I used to live. And there was an H Mart, you know, which I like, my jaw just, like, fell on the floor. There's no H Mart there when I was growing up. So the fact that I could have had access to all of those ingredients, and now the people who live in Broomfield, Colorado do is a miracle.Stephanie Hansen:That's so funny because I'm actually reading crying in H Mart right now for my book club, and it's just a delightful memoir about a woman who's experiencing the loss of her mother through the Korean cooking and heritage that she had growing up, and it's really a delightful book. It's so good. When you are thinking of what you wanna write about for your substack, because I'm in some ways, I'm surprised that you still find this topic and this genre interesting after having worked at Real Simple for five years because I've I it's almost like feels like is it too much of the food, but it it really is steeped in you. And how do you pick, like, what you wanna feature on your Substack versus what would maybe be a potential something in the magazine down the road, or is it just all the love and all of the same?Jenna Helwig:So I for real simple, you know, obviously, I get to kind of put a lot of myself into there and, you know, kind of direct that coverage, you know, pitch what I think we should cover. But I'm always doing that through the lens of our audience. You know? What and I she's usually a she. You know? What does she want? How much time does she have? What's gonna make make her life easier? So I really hyper focus on that. And a lot of it does kind of mirror my life because I am, you know, kind of similar to the real simple reader, but that's primary. I feel like with the substack, I can just do whatever I want. It's really, like, the books and the authors that speak to the me the most. It's nice to kind of have that, you know, freedom even if it's something that maybe we wouldn't cover in the magazine or might be a little more obscure.Jenna Helwig:You know? It's just fun to be able to follow my passions and my interest. And I do love food, and I really love cookbooks. So it's it's funny that I spend even extra time with them, but it really makes me so happy.Stephanie Hansen:I am hoping that in substack's evolution that we get more information about who our readers are. Because when you're, like, at a magazine, you know, you have a deep dive in your target market and the radio show, they know exactly who your p ones are. In Substack, you have followers, but you don't exactly know that much about them except basically where they come from.Jenna Helwig:That is such a good point, and I'm sure you also know so much more about this than me. I'm still I'm such a newbie. I've been a Substack subscriber for a long time. But now I just, you know, launched this, you know, like, over a month just over a month ago, and so I'm still figuring out all the analytics and everything. But I agree that that would be super helpful just to know more. Like and I'm I've also been thinking, and maybe you've done this. Like, have you done surveys of your audience, your subscribers? Yeah. And, also, like, people don't love to fill them all out. Jenna Helwig:I love surveys.Stephanie Hansen:See, I do too, but that's probably because we're, like, the publishing types. Right? So I did a survey, and it kind of mirrored what I thought from an age perspective, but I didn't get much more details than that. K. So I think if I was gonna give Substack advice, and maybe they'll ask me someday. Who knows? Mhmm. That it would be to help us understand who those markets are more because it does help you frame who you're writing for. As you look at the the newsletter, are you going to continue to speak to authors? Will you ever do recipes on your own like you've been in that space? Jenna Helwig:So I don't think I will do recipes on my own. I feel like, you know, when I have ideas for, new dishes or new, you know, like, stories. I kind of direct those to Real Simple. And I've done a lot you know, I've done all those cookbooks. So I sort of feel like the world maybe doesn't need more recipes from me. You know? I'm I'm very interested in what other people have to say. I think that I love doing these author interviews or just the interviews with other people in the cookbook community. Like, recently interviewed the woman who started Instagram's oldest cookbook club.And so she was fascinating. Oh, great. Yes. And there was such a good response to that. I'm interested in talking to people in cookbook publishing. So just really kind of anyone in that community. I I think there might be room later for more, like, reported stories.Stephanie Hansen:Yeah.Jenna Helwig:You know? That so not interviews, but, like, on a certain topic, like book design or titles or spines. I don't know. But, but I I don't think it's gonna be recipes for me. We'll see.Stephanie Hansen:It is interesting. You asked, the woman with the cookbook collection how she organized her collection, and she said by, type of food or genre. But then there's other people that I know that organize it by color.Jenna Helwig:I do that.Stephanie Hansen:Okay. And and it looks so cool. Like, when you have a huge collection, it just it looks so cool on the shelves. But I was like, oh, that would be so hard because unless you remember the color of the cookbook, how could you find it?Jenna Helwig:Yeah. You know, I will say so I live in Brooklyn, New York in a not huge apartment. So I first of all, everything has to look as tidy as possible, and color colors help with that. And I really only have room for about 250 books as opposed to, like, Deborah was saying, she has 2,000 Yeah.Stephanie Hansen:It was crazy. Thousand.Jenna Helwig:So jealous. But so somehow in my mind, I know what the color is. I don't know how to say it, but IStephanie Hansen:don't know how to catalog it. Purple one.Jenna Helwig:Yeah. So if I had more, maybe that wouldn't work.Stephanie Hansen:Yeah. Well and you okay. So you live in Brooklyn. That is such an amazing food community. Yes. And you just have so many great makers. And I do find a lot of good makers in Real Simple, like people making new artisanal products, and I had a podcast about that for a long time. That is really like, when you feel like you've discovered something that someone turns you onto and it's great, That's, like, one of my favorite discoveries about being involved in the food business, and I feel that way about cookbooks too.Jenna Helwig:Absolutely. And I think that when it comes to Real Simple, that's really one of the things that people come to us for. They trust our recommendations, you know, and things that we've discovered. And I feel like that is especially true with our holiday gift guide Yes. Which, you know, is, like, pages and pages every year. We spend months on it, you know, finding things, testing things. And believe it or not, I'm gonna be starting that again soon. But, yes, I I think that that it's such a privilege to be finding these new things and sharing them, and I think we really do get good feedback from them.Stephanie Hansen:Do you get to travel a lot around the country? OrJenna Helwig:Yeah. I mean, you know, there are certainly trips that I am taking for like, I went out to Expo West recently. Do you know that? It's a big, huge, like, food trade show in Anaheim and, went and met with a bunch of different brands, saw what was going on, what was new. So I try to take as many opportunities for travel as possible. I really love to just be out and about.Stephanie Hansen:Did you run across, at that show two gals? They have a product called Maza Chutney.Jenna Helwig:Okay. I was literally just talking to someone about this today. In fact, I was I sent a photo to my executive editor because, yes, I did meet them, and then I was at the Cherry Bomb Jubilee Yes.Stephanie Hansen:And they sampled there.Jenna Helwig:Days ago. Yes. And they sampled there, and I actually got a couple bottles. I was like, can I take that? And they let me. And so I was just I made some eggs for lunch today, and I put the cilantro chutney on top. It was so good. And I was, yeah, just telling one of my colleagues about it. So funny.Stephanie Hansen:I produce culinary markets in the Twin Cities, and they were one of the first makers that I met when I started doing this. And I was just like, oh, those those girls are onto something, and it's a family business. Their story is so great.Jenna Helwig:The branding is amazing Yep. And the food tastes great. Are they from there?Stephanie Hansen:Yeah. From the Twin Cities. Wow. They've just developed to, like a lentil spread. That's a like a hummus, but with lentils and also super flavorful and delicious. So watch for that because that's a brand new product line that they just are launching. But, yeah, weird coincidence, but Oh, funny. Yeah.Great product. When you can you can you remember your actual first cookbook that you got?Jenna Helwig:Oh, okay. So I don't I know it was a Betty Crocker, like, cooking or baking for kids book. I am not I think it was baking. I actually was trying to find the cover recently, just, like, Google search, and I couldn't. But I think that's what it was. Do you have one?Stephanie Hansen:Well, I mean, I have a few vintage.Jenna Helwig:I kinda select Yeah. It wasn't that one because it was for kids book, but I love that. It was like baking for kids or something.Stephanie Hansen:Yeah. And then did it have, did it have, like, wiener roll ups in it?Jenna Helwig:Oh my god. Maybe. The thing I remember the most were little English muffin pizzas or something like that. I remember my brother and I making those over and over.Stephanie Hansen:It I think it also had these, like, clown cupcakes.Jenna Helwig:That also sounds familiar. And maybe like cat cupcakes?Stephanie Hansen:Yes. Oh, so funny. Every year, we do a cookbook swap, and it's a super fun event. And people come and bring books that they no longer want or use, and we kinda sort them loosely in this huge room. And then we say go, and everybody, like, runs in. And however many books you bought or brought, you get to roughly take the same amount out, but you don't have to. But it's been fascinating, the books that people bring. And, I mean, I there's, like, a New York Times 1973 edition that has this recipe in it that's only in that book that's for a lamb ragu.Stephanie Hansen:And every year, I see that book come by, and I, like, pick the woman who's probably, like, twenty, twenty four. And I like press this book into her hands and I'm like, you need to have this book and you need to make the recipe on page one twenty one. And it's like three times it's happened and then they'll email me and they're like, I would have never found that recipe without you. It's such a great fun event.Jenna Helwig:That sounds wonderful. I love that idea.Stephanie Hansen:Yeah. It is really fun, and we get a lot of, like, boxes of people's recipe cards that were, like, someone's grandma's. And my radio partner and I always sort of move that stuff to the side, And then we keep it for a year and, like, go through it and look at it, and then we bring it back the next year. We've been doing this for, like, ten years. So it's been so fun to see what, like, really are in people's collections and what they get rid of. And, I mean, how many peanut butter blossom recipes there are in the world.Jenna Helwig:You know what? The world needs more peanut butter blossoms. Delicious.Stephanie Hansen:Yeah. Always delicious and always tasty. Well, it has been super fun to chat with you. I want people to follow your Substack. It is the Cookbookery Collective Cookbook newsletter, and we are with Jenna Helwig. And I'm just really appreciative for your time today. Congratulations on your twenty fifth anniversary with Real Simple. That's fun too.Jenna Helwig:Thank you so much. It's been a real pleasure to talk to you.Stephanie Hansen:Yes. Absolutely. Thanks, Jenna. Mhmm. Bye bye.Jenna Helwig:Bye.Stephanie's Dish Newsletter is a reader-supported publication. To receive new posts and support my work, consider becoming a free or paid subscriber. This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit stephaniehansen.substack.com/subscribe

Welcome to another episode of "Dishing with Stephanie's Dish," the podcast for everyone obsessed with food, cookbooks, and the stories they tell. Today, host Stephanie Hansen sits down with Jenna Helwig —a true powerhouse in the cookbook world. You may know Jenna as the creator of the Cookbookery Collective newsletter but she's also the food director at Real Simple magazine and a prolific cookbook author herself. In this conversation, Stephanie and Jenna dive into their mutual love for cookbooks, discuss the enduring charm of print in a digital world, and explore the evolving landscape of cookbook publishing, from celebrity chefs to everyday cooks and influencers.Jenna shares insights from her career, talks about the resurgence and diversity of cookbooks, and lets us in on what it's like to balance her editorial roles at Real Simple and her Substack. They chat about memorable cookbooks from childhood, the pressure (and freedom) of home cooking, and the unique joys of discovering new recipes and makers. Whether you're a cookbook collector, home cook, or just love a good food story, this episode is packed with inspiration, nostalgia, and plenty of practical wisdom. So grab your favorite cookbook, get comfy, and join us for a delicious discussion!FULL EPISODE TRANSCRIPT FOLLOWS:Stephanie Hansen:Hello, everybody, and welcome to @DishingwithStephaniesDish, the podcast where we talk to people that are obsessed with food, cookbooks, and all things in the food space. And today, I'm speaking with Jenna Helwig, and I kinda came across her mostly on Substack, which I think maybe will make her be surprised. I found her as the creator of the cookbookery collective cookbook newsletter, and I was like, hey. You're into cookbooks. I'm into cookbooks. Let's talk about cookbooks. And we got the call set up, and then she said, oh, and by the way, I am the food director of Real Simple magazine. And I was like, oh, just that small detail that I literally did not even know about you.I'm so embarrassed. Welcome to the program.Jenna Helwig:Thank you so much. Thanks for having me. And I'm thrilled that you found me through the substack because that's a newish thing for me, and I love that, you know, people are reading it.Stephanie Hansen:Yes. And I was so like, I'm just obsessed with cookbooks, and I am a cookbook writer. I'm on my second book that's coming up, and I read a lot about trying to get published and different points of view of cookbooks. And we have quite a few good cookbook authors that hail from the Midwest in the Twin Cities here. And you had, I think, done an interview with my friend Zoe from Zoey Bakes, which probably is how I found out about you.Jenna Helwig:That is probably right. Yes. Zoey. Also, I think of Amy Theilan. I know she's not right there, but she's, you know, in the vicinity. Right? So yeah. For sure. And Pinch of Yum, aren't they based in Minneapolis? So yeah.Jenna Helwig:They are. A good a good food thing going.Stephanie Hansen:Yes. And the Food Dolls just published their book. They have, like, 8,000,000 followers.Jenna Helwig:Amazing. I guess I've been through that interview. Yeah. And who is that?Stephanie Hansen:Sarah Kiefer, do you know her?Jenna Helwig:Oh, yes. Of course. Her cookies, baked goods. Yeah.Stephanie Hansen:Yeah. We are all from, the Twin Cities, and most of them have, like, specialty angles. Like, I am just a home cook, so that's sort of my point of view on the Midwest. But it has been a really great market to be in. And one of the things that I started a radio show about seventeen years ago, so we've talked a lot of these people along the way. And right when we started the radio show, you know, Facebook and Instagram were launching, and it's been such an interesting trajectory to see cookbook authors in particular. And, like, everyone's like, oh, print is dead. Like, magazines are dead.Publications are dead. And yet, you know, cookbooks are, in some respects, doing better than ever.Jenna Helwig:Yeah. I agree. I feel like they are thriving. I also feel like, you know, at least for me personally, and I do notice this though with a lot of other people that we are on our screens all the time, and we're kinda tired of it. So whether it's a cookbook or even a print magazine, like, there's just something so lovely about turning pages, just, like, shutting out everything else. No other notifications are popping up on your screen. So print is very special.Stephanie Hansen:Yeah. And it feels like you can have, like, personal one on one time with it because you can set your phone down and really immerse yourself in the story.Jenna Helwig:Yes. Exactly. We all need more of that.Stephanie Hansen:I think so. My food magazines too, you mentioned that you're the food director of Real Simple, and you guys are having your twenty fifth anniversary. Yes. And I literally before you sent me that text, I was, like, reading it. And I'm a subscriber, so I'm gonna hold up my copy here. Because I really I love food print too. I worked in the newspaper business, and I'm kind of a tactile print person also. And you had a really cool feature this month about what's the best takeaway you've ever gotten from Real Simple because you guys are in your 25th birthday. So I thought I'd ask you what your best takeaway is.Jenna Helwig:Oh my gosh. That's such a hard question. Alright. I I'm sure it's going to be food related, and I'm kinda gonna cheat and pick something from that month. I worked with Molly Ye on the beautiful birthday cake that's on the cover. And, you know, one of the things she did that I feel like I've used in other in other applications, but never for frosting, was she used instead of food coloring, freeze dried raspberry powder to make the beautiful pink frosting. And I just hadn't done that before, and it was so easy and such a kind of natural way to make something look so lovely.Stephanie Hansen:Yeah. That's funny because, yeah, and the cake, it's a it's a lemon poppy seed cake, and then it has like a a raspberry pink frosting on the outside and then raspberry jam on the inside. It really it also gives you a little bit of that raspberry flavor in the frosting, but it's not like super wet like it would be if you used real raspberries or also, like, super overly sweet if you used just jam.Jenna Helwig:You know what? That is exactly right because it lends that little bit of tartness to it too, and so it's just such a nicely balanced frosting.Stephanie Hansen:So you are a cookbook writer yourself.Jenna Helwig:Mhmm.Stephanie Hansen:I'm forgetting the name of your books. It's Minute Dinners or Dinner andJenna Helwig:“Bare Minimum Dinners.” The most Bare minimum. Yes. “Bare Minimum Dinners”. Stephanie Hansen:I'm all for that. And you've had, a number of cookbooks, I think. Aren't you? Like, you've had a few more of that too.Jenna Helwig:Yes. So I've written five books. Three of them were more in the, like, family baby toddler space. I used to be the food editor at Parents Magazine. Sure. And so that was really how I kind of got into cookbook writing. I started with real baby food and then wrote one called baby led feeding. And I will say that is by far my best selling cookbook.Jenna Helwig:You know, it's still something we actually did a reissue a couple of years ago, so I did an updated version. It's still something that parents are finding, and that just makes me so happy.Stephanie Hansen:My neighbor who just had a baby, she's gonna be two, was obsessed with that book because I just she knows I write cookbooks, and I film a TV show in my house too. So I'm always bringing them food. And when she first had the baby, she showed it to me, and she was like, have you ever heard of this book?Jenna Helwig:And it was yours. Oh my gosh. That's amazing. Well, that's so great. I'm I that's a really hard time of life as I you know, just, like, trying to figure out no one really tells you how to feed your baby, which is strange. And so I think anything that I could do to make it just less stressful, that was always my goal with those books.Stephanie Hansen:And I think that there's so much to be said about just getting dinner on the table. Like, it's almost a political act these days just to, like, be working, be taking care of your mental health, be worrying about your social time with your kids, your family, your family, aging parents, and then all of a sudden every day someone is supposed to, like, be putting all these elaborate meals on the table, like, sometimes just even surviving a day without the food, and then you have this whole other stressor on top of it.Jenna Helwig:I could not agree more. I mean, which is why I thought of bare minimum dinners. Like, it's this idea, and we do this also in real simple. You know, it's very similar. They're like I call fussy the f word. I'm like, nothing fussy, you know, especially when we're talking about recipes in the magazine. Skip the garnish. Like, you know, there's you're not putting on a show for anyone.You know? Just do what you can. That's really you know? But is it better or good is better than perfect. Done is better than perfect. Just get it done.Stephanie Hansen:And some people, like, because they feel like they're trying to live up to something in a Instagram photo, it prevents them from having a dinner party or, making food for a neighbor because maybe it's, like, not good enough. You know, just the sheer act of eating and providing food for your family, whoever your family looks like, or even just for yourself, you are gonna eat better. You're gonna have more control over what you eat. I have eaten at a million restaurants in my life, and I just find that I always feel so much better when I'm cooking at home.Jenna Helwig:I agree. I love to go out to eat. However, then if if I do that too much, I'm like, okay. I just need to reset at home. And, you know, I've also noticed that in some cookbooks, there has been this trend towards the food not being overly styled or the author doing that themselves and thinking about, like, Julia Tershen with her last book. You know, she photographed that herself, and the food looks great, but also real.Like, you could do it. And, also the book Chinese Enough that I just featured in Cookbookery Collective. You know, those recipes just don't feel like nitpicked to death. You know? They're just very naturalStephanie Hansen:looking. I feel like we might see more of that. I photographed my own book, but it was simply out of necessity because I didn't have $20 to pay someone. So I said to the publisher, well, if my Instagram's okay, I'm gonna do, like, similar to that. Is that okay? And they were like, sure. Oh, great. As we look at cookbooks as a genre, things have changed a lot because it used to be that you were a professional chef or you were a restaurant chef and you were writing about your restaurant or you were a small group of people that were super experienced in cooking, and maybe you had, you know, 10 books that you were writing in the different genres. You did vegetarian and gluten free and then dairy free.Now, like, the cookbook space is really kind of being taken up by regular people or influencers in a lot of respects. Does that, open the door for more excitement or is it sometimes do you worry that maybe the books aren't as good? Oh,Jenna Helwig:Oh, that's a tough question. I think that anything that gets people cooking is good. So I am you know, if the it is someone without a lot of cooking experience who has a book, but it still excites people to get into the kitchen, fantastic. So that's really my main goal. I do think, you know, where I am in my life, like, I really wanna learn something new from a cookbook. So that's what I personally am looking for, but there are cooks of all different, you know, ability levels and experience levels. So I think that having a variety of cookbooks that can reach everyone where they are is probably the answer.Stephanie Hansen:There is so much diversity too in cookbooks now. Like, the no offense to the old beautiful Asian cookbooks that you would get, but, you know, you didn't really feel like you could make a lot of the things out of there because maybe you didn't have the ingredients or you weren't familiar with technique. The the more recent diversity in cookbooks, it feels like you can actually make some of these things.Jenna Helwig:Well, I think that's right. Some of the things do feel more accessible. And, also, we just have access to so many more ingredients now, which is amazing. Just even at, like, regular grocery stores. My parents live in Colorado and, like, in the suburbs, and I was, you know, just driving by where I used to live. And there was an H Mart, you know, which I like, my jaw just, like, fell on the floor. There's no H Mart there when I was growing up. So the fact that I could have had access to all of those ingredients, and now the people who live in Broomfield, Colorado do is a miracle.Stephanie Hansen:That's so funny because I'm actually reading crying in H Mart right now for my book club, and it's just a delightful memoir about a woman who's experiencing the loss of her mother through the Korean cooking and heritage that she had growing up, and it's really a delightful book. It's so good. When you are thinking of what you wanna write about for your substack, because I'm in some ways, I'm surprised that you still find this topic and this genre interesting after having worked at Real Simple for five years because I've I it's almost like feels like is it too much of the food, but it it really is steeped in you. And how do you pick, like, what you wanna feature on your Substack versus what would maybe be a potential something in the magazine down the road, or is it just all the love and all of the same?Jenna Helwig:So I for real simple, you know, obviously, I get to kind of put a lot of myself into there and, you know, kind of direct that coverage, you know, pitch what I think we should cover. But I'm always doing that through the lens of our audience. You know? What and I she's usually a she. You know? What does she want? How much time does she have? What's gonna make make her life easier? So I really hyper focus on that. And a lot of it does kind of mirror my life because I am, you know, kind of similar to the real simple reader, but that's primary. I feel like with the substack, I can just do whatever I want. It's really, like, the books and the authors that speak to the me the most. It's nice to kind of have that, you know, freedom even if it's something that maybe we wouldn't cover in the magazine or might be a little more obscure.Jenna Helwig:You know? It's just fun to be able to follow my passions and my interest. And I do love food, and I really love cookbooks. So it's it's funny that I spend even extra time with them, but it really makes me so happy.Stephanie Hansen:I am hoping that in substack's evolution that we get more information about who our readers are. Because when you're, like, at a magazine, you know, you have a deep dive in your target market and the radio show, they know exactly who your p ones are. In Substack, you have followers, but you don't exactly know that much about them except basically where they come from.Jenna Helwig:That is such a good point, and I'm sure you also know so much more about this than me. I'm still I'm such a newbie. I've been a Substack subscriber for a long time. But now I just, you know, launched this, you know, like, over a month just over a month ago, and so I'm still figuring out all the analytics and everything. But I agree that that would be super helpful just to know more. Like and I'm I've also been thinking, and maybe you've done this. Like, have you done surveys of your audience, your subscribers? Yeah. And, also, like, people don't love to fill them all out. Jenna Helwig:I love surveys.Stephanie Hansen:See, I do too, but that's probably because we're, like, the publishing types. Right? So I did a survey, and it kind of mirrored what I thought from an age perspective, but I didn't get much more details than that. K. So I think if I was gonna give Substack advice, and maybe they'll ask me someday. Who knows? Mhmm. That it would be to help us understand who those markets are more because it does help you frame who you're writing for. As you look at the the newsletter, are you going to continue to speak to authors? Will you ever do recipes on your own like you've been in that space? Jenna Helwig:So I don't think I will do recipes on my own. I feel like, you know, when I have ideas for, new dishes or new, you know, like, stories. I kind of direct those to Real Simple. And I've done a lot you know, I've done all those cookbooks. So I sort of feel like the world maybe doesn't need more recipes from me. You know? I'm I'm very interested in what other people have to say. I think that I love doing these author interviews or just the interviews with other people in the cookbook community. Like, recently interviewed the woman who started Instagram's oldest cookbook club.And so she was fascinating. Oh, great. Yes. And there was such a good response to that. I'm interested in talking to people in cookbook publishing. So just really kind of anyone in that community. I I think there might be room later for more, like, reported stories.Stephanie Hansen:Yeah.Jenna Helwig:You know? That so not interviews, but, like, on a certain topic, like book design or titles or spines. I don't know. But, but I I don't think it's gonna be recipes for me. We'll see.Stephanie Hansen:It is interesting. You asked, the woman with the cookbook collection how she organized her collection, and she said by, type of food or genre. But then there's other people that I know that organize it by color.Jenna Helwig:I do that.Stephanie Hansen:Okay. And and it looks so cool. Like, when you have a huge collection, it just it looks so cool on the shelves. But I was like, oh, that would be so hard because unless you remember the color of the cookbook, how could you find it?Jenna Helwig:Yeah. You know, I will say so I live in Brooklyn, New York in a not huge apartment. So I first of all, everything has to look as tidy as possible, and color colors help with that. And I really only have room for about 250 books as opposed to, like, Deborah was saying, she has 2,000 Yeah.Stephanie Hansen:It was crazy. Thousand.Jenna Helwig:So jealous. But so somehow in my mind, I know what the color is. I don't know how to say it, but IStephanie Hansen:don't know how to catalog it. Purple one.Jenna Helwig:Yeah. So if I had more, maybe that wouldn't work.Stephanie Hansen:Yeah. Well and you okay. So you live in Brooklyn. That is such an amazing food community. Yes. And you just have so many great makers. And I do find a lot of good makers in Real Simple, like people making new artisanal products, and I had a podcast about that for a long time. That is really like, when you feel like you've discovered something that someone turns you onto and it's great, That's, like, one of my favorite discoveries about being involved in the food business, and I feel that way about cookbooks too.Jenna Helwig:Absolutely. And I think that when it comes to Real Simple, that's really one of the things that people come to us for. They trust our recommendations, you know, and things that we've discovered. And I feel like that is especially true with our holiday gift guide Yes. Which, you know, is, like, pages and pages every year. We spend months on it, you know, finding things, testing things. And believe it or not, I'm gonna be starting that again soon. But, yes, I I think that that it's such a privilege to be finding these new things and sharing them, and I think we really do get good feedback from them.Stephanie Hansen:Do you get to travel a lot around the country? OrJenna Helwig:Yeah. I mean, you know, there are certainly trips that I am taking for like, I went out to Expo West recently. Do you know that? It's a big, huge, like, food trade show in Anaheim and, went and met with a bunch of different brands, saw what was going on, what was new. So I try to take as many opportunities for travel as possible. I really love to just be out and about.Stephanie Hansen:Did you run across, at that show two gals? They have a product called Maza Chutney.Jenna Helwig:Okay. I was literally just talking to someone about this today. In fact, I was I sent a photo to my executive editor because, yes, I did meet them, and then I was at the Cherry Bomb Jubilee Yes.Stephanie Hansen:And they sampled there.Jenna Helwig:Days ago. Yes. And they sampled there, and I actually got a couple bottles. I was like, can I take that? And they let me. And so I was just I made some eggs for lunch today, and I put the cilantro chutney on top. It was so good. And I was, yeah, just telling one of my colleagues about it. So funny.Stephanie Hansen:I produce culinary markets in the Twin Cities, and they were one of the first makers that I met when I started doing this. And I was just like, oh, those those girls are onto something, and it's a family business. Their story is so great.Jenna Helwig:The branding is amazing Yep. And the food tastes great. Are they from there?Stephanie Hansen:Yeah. From the Twin Cities. Wow. They've just developed to, like a lentil spread. That's a like a hummus, but with lentils and also super flavorful and delicious. So watch for that because that's a brand new product line that they just are launching. But, yeah, weird coincidence, but Oh, funny. Yeah.Great product. When you can you can you remember your actual first cookbook that you got?Jenna Helwig:Oh, okay. So I don't I know it was a Betty Crocker, like, cooking or baking for kids book. I am not I think it was baking. I actually was trying to find the cover recently, just, like, Google search, and I couldn't. But I think that's what it was. Do you have one?Stephanie Hansen:Well, I mean, I have a few vintage.Jenna Helwig:I kinda select Yeah. It wasn't that one because it was for kids book, but I love that. It was like baking for kids or something.Stephanie Hansen:Yeah. And then did it have, did it have, like, wiener roll ups in it?Jenna Helwig:Oh my god. Maybe. The thing I remember the most were little English muffin pizzas or something like that. I remember my brother and I making those over and over.Stephanie Hansen:It I think it also had these, like, clown cupcakes.Jenna Helwig:That also sounds familiar. And maybe like cat cupcakes?Stephanie Hansen:Yes. Oh, so funny. Every year, we do a cookbook swap, and it's a super fun event. And people come and bring books that they no longer want or use, and we kinda sort them loosely in this huge room. And then we say go, and everybody, like, runs in. And however many books you bought or brought, you get to roughly take the same amount out, but you don't have to. But it's been fascinating, the books that people bring. And, I mean, I there's, like, a New York Times 1973 edition that has this recipe in it that's only in that book that's for a lamb ragu.Stephanie Hansen:And every year, I see that book come by, and I, like, pick the woman who's probably, like, twenty, twenty four. And I like press this book into her hands and I'm like, you need to have this book and you need to make the recipe on page one twenty one. And it's like three times it's happened and then they'll email me and they're like, I would have never found that recipe without you. It's such a great fun event.Jenna Helwig:That sounds wonderful. I love that idea.Stephanie Hansen:Yeah. It is really fun, and we get a lot of, like, boxes of people's recipe cards that were, like, someone's grandma's. And my radio partner and I always sort of move that stuff to the side, And then we keep it for a year and, like, go through it and look at it, and then we bring it back the next year. We've been doing this for, like, ten years. So it's been so fun to see what, like, really are in people's collections and what they get rid of. And, I mean, how many peanut butter blossom recipes there are in the world.Jenna Helwig:You know what? The world needs more peanut butter blossoms. Delicious.Stephanie Hansen:Yeah. Always delicious and always tasty. Well, it has been super fun to chat with you. I want people to follow your Substack. It is the Cookbookery Collective Cookbook newsletter, and we are with Jenna Helwig. And I'm just really appreciative for your time today. Congratulations on your twenty fifth anniversary with Real Simple. That's fun too.Jenna Helwig:Thank you so much. It's been a real pleasure to talk to you.Stephanie Hansen:Yes. Absolutely. Thanks, Jenna. Mhmm. Bye bye.Jenna Helwig:Bye.Stephanie's Dish Newsletter is a reader-supported publication. To receive new posts and support my work, consider becoming a free or paid subscriber. This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit stephaniehansen.substack.com/subscribe

Shari Botwin, LCSW, has been counseling survivors in recovery from all types of traumas in her Philadelphia based private practice for over twenty-eight years. Her second book, “Thriving After Trauma: Stories of Living and Healing, Rowman & Littlefield,” (Rowman & Littlefield, November 8, 2019) deals with overcoming trauma including physical and sexual abuse, war-related injury, loss due to tragedy or illness and natural disaster. Botwin's third book, Stolen Childhoods, released worldwide in May 2024.Botwin has been qualified as an expert witness in high profile civil and criminal cases, including a case against R Kelly and another case involving over 100 plaintiffs against former pediatrician, Stuart Copperman. In January, Botwin was a featured panelist on a CLE panel about trauma-informed care for the Montgomery Bar Association, in Pennsylvania. Botwin has conducted Keynote presentations for CE credits for Advanced Recovery Systems, Stockton University, Rutgers University, Monte Nido Eating Disorders Center, International Association of Eating Disorder Professionals, Complex Post-Traumatic Stress Organization, Hofstra University, and Bay Path University. Botwin has given expert on-air commentary on breaking stories related to trauma and abuse.She also is a regular guest contributor on the Law & Crime Network. NBC Nightly News , NBC News Now, Good Morning America, CBS This Morning NBC News Now with Dr. John Torres, Merit Street, Law & Crime, ABC News, CBS News, MSNBC Live, CTV News, CP-24 News, CNN, Time Magazine, Rolling Stone Magazine, Parade Magazine, The Daily Beast,  Parents Magazine, US Weekly, Newsy, Sports Illustrated, Prevention Magazine, The New York Times, Rolling Stone Magazine, Bored Panda, Parade Magazine, Parents Magazine, Newsbreak,  The Associated Press, Philadelphia Magazine and Radio Europe. Shari Botwin, LCSW (www.sharibotwin.com),For Speaking Engagements: Shari Botwin | Speaking Fee | Booking AgentAmazon author page: https://www.amazon.com/author/stolenchildhoodsStolen Childhoods here: https://www.amazon.com/Stolen-Childhoods-Thriving-After-Abuse/dp/1538183625/Audiobook with Tantor Media: https://www.amazon.com/Stolen-Childhoods-Thriving-After-Abuse/dp/B0D4RFX67B/Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/shari-botwin-901172a Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/warriorbotwin7/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/sharilcsw/ Twitter: https://www.twitter.com/shari_botwinOur Hosts:      Linda and John(Jack) Mazur founded a nonprofit 501(c)3 organization in 2022 in memory of their daughter, Emilee which provides peer support, social connection, and education for adults with eating disorders and for their family members. For more information or to contact them go to: www.theemileeconnection.com  Linda and John (Jack) Mazur wrote, Emilee: The Story of a Girl and Her Family Hijacked by Anorexia, to honor their daughter's wish, to raise awareness, evoke compassion, and foster change in how eating disorders are viewed and treated.Paperback: and Kindle:https://www.amazon.com/Emilee-Story-Family-Hijacked-Anorexia/dp/170092012X      Audiobook:https://www.amazon.com/Emilee-Story-Family-Hijacked-Anorexia/dp/B08R6LRPDS       Linda and Jack can also be reached through the book website:  https://emileethestoryofagirl.com or at Linda.john.mazur@gmail.com  Ellen Bennett is the director of KMB for Answers, a non-profit charity providing educational and financial support for mental health professionals as well as assistance for families in search of resources. For more information about Ellen Bennett and the foundation founded in memory of her daughter Katlyn, go to: www.Kmbforanswers.com

Panic attacks—these intense moments can come on suddenly and feel terrifying, whether you're experiencing one or witnessing your child go through it.In this week's episode I'll help you understand the difference between a panic attack and an anxiety attack, what's happening in the brain during these episodes, and most importantly, how to respond in a calm, supportive, and effective way. You'll learn practical strategies to help your child feel safe, grounded, and empowered when panic takes over, and how to support their overall emotional well-being going forward.Whether you're navigating this now or preparing for the future, this episode is full of essential tools and compassionate insight to help your family through.Jennifer's Takeaways:Understanding Panic Attacks (00:00)Differences Between Panic and Anxiety Attacks (02:11)The Impact of Panic Attacks on Parents and Children (03:22)Strategies for Managing Panic Attacks (07:33)Practical Techniques for Calming Down (13:39)Long-Term Management and Therapy (21:59)Meet Jennifer KolariJennifer Kolari is the host of the “Connected Parenting” weekly podcast and the co-host of “The Mental Health Comedy” podcast. Kolari is a frequent guest on Nationwide morning shows and podcasts in th US and Canada. Her advice can also be found in many Canadian and US magazines such as; Today's Parent, Parents Magazine and Canadian Family.Kolari's powerful parenting model is based on the neurobiology of love, teaching parents how to use compassion and empathy as powerful medicine to transform challenging behavior and build children's emotional resilience and emotional shock absorbers.Jennifer's wisdom, quick wit and down to earth style help parents navigate modern-day parenting problems, offering real-life examples as well as practical and effective tools and strategies.Her highly entertaining, inspiring workshops are shared with warmth and humour, making her a crowd-pleasing speaker with schools, medical professionals, corporations and agencies throughout North America, Europe and Asia.One of the nation's leading parenting experts, Jennifer Kolari, is a highly sought- after international speaker and the founder of Connected Parenting. A child and family therapist with a busy practice based in San Diego and Toronto, Kolari is also the author of Connected Parenting: How to Raise A Great Kid (Penguin Group USA and Penguin Canada, 2009) and You're Ruining My Life! (But Not Really): Surviving the Teenage Years with Connected Parenting (Penguin Canada, 2011).

In this powerful and deeply personal episode of Connected Parenting, I sit down with Sonia Cacciacarro —registered psychotherapist and member of the Connected Parenting team—for an honest and compassionate conversation about grief, loss, and how to talk to children about death and dying.Sonia shares her journey from fitness expert and mom of three to psychotherapist, and how her husband's diagnosis and passing from FTD and ALS shaped her passion for helping families navigate bereavement and loss. Together, we explore why our culture struggles with death, why it's so hard for parents to talk about it with their kids, and how we can support our children (and ourselves) through the grieving process.Whether you're walking through grief right now or want to build the emotional resilience your child will one day need, this episode offers deep insights, practical strategies, and loving support for some of life's hardest moments.Jennifer's Takeaways:Sonia's Journey into Grief and Death Counseling (02:38)The Importance of Talking About Death and Dying (04:14)Children's Understanding and Coping with Death (16:48)Navigating Social Interactions and Support Systems (17:09)The Role of Empathy and Sympathy in Grief (17:30)Preparing Children for Future Losses (18:37)The Impact of Cultural and Personal Beliefs on Grief (20:10)Conclusion and Final Thoughts (27:30)Meet Sonia Cacciacarro Sonia began her career in the health and fitness industry, working in corporate fitness and country clubs before launching her own fitness consulting and personal training business. After becoming a mother of three, she transitioned to being a stay-at-home mom. This period of family life led her to a journey of self-discovery, ultimately guiding her to pursue a career in psychotherapy.Sonia became a Registered Psychotherapist in 2016, founding her own private practice, and joined the Connected Parenting team in 2018, where she works with children, teens, adults, couples, and families. In April 2021, Sonia's life took a dramatic turn when her husband was diagnosed with Frontotemporal Dementia (FTD) and ALS. She took a break from her practice to care for him until he died in October 2022. Sonia credits her education, work experience, and personal resilience for helping her navigate this challenging period. Now, her professional focus has expanded to helping families cope with grief, bereavement, death, and dying.Website: https://therapybysonia.ca/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/therapybysonia/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100063605529221#LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/sonia-cacciacarro-275292127/Meet Jennifer KolariJennifer Kolari is the host of the “Connected Parenting” weekly podcast and the co-host of “The Mental Health Comedy” podcast. Kolari is a frequent guest on Nationwide morning shows and podcasts in th US and Canada. Her advice can also be found in many Canadian and US magazines such as; Today's Parent, Parents Magazine and Canadian Family.Kolari's powerful parenting model is based on the neurobiology of love, teaching parents how to use compassion and empathy as powerful medicine to transform challenging behavior and build children's emotional resilience and emotional shock absorbers.Jennifer's wisdom, quick wit and down to earth style help parents navigate modern-day parenting problems, offering real-life examples as well as practical and effective tools and strategies.Her highly entertaining, inspiring workshops are shared with warmth and humour, making her a crowd-pleasing speaker with schools, medical professionals, corporations and agencies throughout North America, Europe and Asia.One of the nation's leading parenting experts, Jennifer Kolari, is a highly sought- after international speaker and the founder of Connected Parenting. A child and family therapist with a busy practice based in San Diego and Toronto, Kolari is also the author of Connected Parenting: How to Raise A Great Kid (Penguin Group USA and Penguin Canada, 2009) and You're Ruining My Life! (But Not Really): Surviving the Teenage Years with Connected Parenting (Penguin Canada, 2011).

Welcome to another episode of the Spun Today podcast! In this captivating session, host Tony Ortiz sits down with Amanda Lucas, a middle school ELA teacher with a rich tapestry of experiences in both education and writing. Amanda shares her journey from being an aspiring writer and journalist to embracing her role as an educator. As an insightful storyteller, she dives deep into the nuances of teaching different grade levels, from dealing with classroom management to confronting bullying. Amanda also opens up about the challenges of adjusting to digital teaching in a post-Covid world. As a co-host of the Che podcast, she shares her insights on how educators navigate the intricacies of teaching, while still finding room to nurture young minds creatively. Tune in to explore Amanda's unique experiences and discover more about her impactful journey in shaping and inspiring future generations.   The Spun Today Podcast is a Podcast that is anchored in Writing & Random Rants, but unlimited in scope.  Give it a whirl.    Twitter: https://twitter.com/spuntoday Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/spuntoday/ Website: http://www.spuntoday.com/home Newsletter: http://www.spuntoday.com/subscribe   Links referenced in this episode:     I Need An Idea! (A Leli and Emmi Book) https://amzn.to/4hSvjYs   Check out Amanda's Podcast: Ch! Wherever you listen to podcasts. iTunes: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/ch/id1443818572 Spotify:https://open.spotify.com/show/3HLRAzQJiplVcsv68Ce0W0?si=YgEBWrKZSfeGK8nnA11dBw   Follow the Podcast on IG: @chcast   Follow Amanda on IG: @itzmeamandalee     Gotham Writers: https://www.writingclasses.com/   Parents Magazine: https://www.parents.com/parents-magazine/   Meredith Corporation: https://www.meredith.com/national-media/brands   Check out Leli's Magical Stitches: https://vimeo.com/80441330     Articles by Amanda: https://www.smilesforall.com/first-grade-first-love/ https://www.parents.com/baby/gear/sling/how-to-buy-a-backpack-carrier1/ https://www.parents.com/baby/gear/sling/14-baby-carriers/   Check out Elizabeth Acevedo's website: http://www.acevedowrites.com/     Some of the books referenced in this episode: I Am Not Your Perfect Mexican Daughter: https://www.amazon.com/Not-Your-Perfect-Mexican-Daughter/dp/1524700517/ref=sr_1_1?crid=7SGY6YEGY648&dchild=1&keywords=i%27m+not+your+perfect+mexican+daughter&qid=1592881345&sprefix=i%27m+not+your+per%2Caps%2C155&sr=8-1   How Tia Lola Came to (Visit) Stay (The Tia Lola Stories): https://www.amazon.com/Lola-Came-Visit-Stay-Stories/dp/0440418704/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=tia+lola&qid=1592881392&sr=8-1     Fever 1793: https://www.amazon.com/Fever-1793-Laurie-Halse-Anderson/dp/0689848919/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=Fever+1793&qid=1592881188&sr=8-1   Night: https://www.amazon.com/Night-Elie-Wiesel/dp/0374500010/ref=sr_1_1?crid=1CF64KYF0BMZM&dchild=1&keywords=night+by+elie+wiesel&qid=1592883611&sprefix=night+by+%2Caps%2C157&sr=8-1   Get your Podcast Started Today! https://signup.libsyn.com/?promo_code=SPUN (Use Promo code SPUN and get up to 2-months of free service!)   Check out all the Spun Today Merch, and other ways to help support this show! https://www.spuntoday.com/support   Check out my Books Make Way for You – Tips for getting out of your own way FRACTAL – A Time Travel Tale Melted Cold – A Collection of Short Stories http://www.spuntoday.com/books/ (e-Book, Paperback & Hardcover are now available).   Fill out my Spun Today Questionnaire if you're passionate about your craft.  I'll share your insight and motivation on the Podcast: http://www.spuntoday.com/questionnaire/    Shop on Amazon using this link, to support the Podcast: http://www.amazon.com//ref=as_sl_pc_tf_lc?&tag=sputod0c-20&camp=216797&creative=446321&linkCode=ur1&adid=104DDN7SG8A2HXW52TFB&&ref-refURL=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.spuntoday.com%2Fcontact%2F   Shop on iTunes using this link, to support the Podcast: https://itunes.apple.com/WebObjects/MZStore.woa/wa/viewTop?genreId=38&id=27820&popId=42&uo=10   Shop at the Spun Today store for Mugs, T-Shirts and more: https://viralstyle.com/store/spuntoday/tonyortiz   Music: https://www.purple-planet.com   Outro Background Music: https://www.bensound.com   Spun Today Logo by: https://www.naveendhanalak.com/   Sound effects are credited to: http://www.freesfx.co.uk   Listen on: iTunes | Spotify| Pocket Casts| YouTube | Website 

Today's question comes from the community: How do you explain what's happening in your child's brain during big emotions in a way they can understand and actually listen to?We all know that feeling—trying to explain why their emotions feel so big, but they just glaze over or dismiss what you're saying. Maybe they think you don't know what you're talking about, or they just aren't in the space to absorb the information. Sometimes, it helps to hear it from someone who isn't their parent.For this reason in today's episode, I will guide you through clear and relatable ways to help your child understand what's happening in their brain during moments of anger, frustration, or overwhelm. I've also included special parts of this episode designed for your child to listen to directly, making it easier for them to grasp these concepts and feel understood.Jennifer's Takeaways:Understanding How to Talk to Kids About Their Brain (00:00)Engaging Kids in Conversations About Their Brain (03:02)Strategies for Managing Big Feelings (06:13)Practical Tips for Parents (08:58)Resources and Additional Support (11:33)Meet Jennifer KolariJennifer Kolari is the host of the “Connected Parenting” weekly podcast and the co-host of “The Mental Health Comedy” podcast. Kolari is a frequent guest on Nationwide morning shows and podcasts in th US and Canada. Her advice can also be found in many Canadian and US magazines such as; Today's Parent, Parents Magazine and Canadian Family.Kolari's powerful parenting model is based on the neurobiology of love, teaching parents how to use compassion and empathy as powerful medicine to transform challenging behavior and build children's emotional resilience and emotional shock absorbers.Jennifer's wisdom, quick wit and down to earth style help parents navigate modern-day parenting problems, offering real-life examples as well as practical and effective tools and strategies.Her highly entertaining, inspiring workshops are shared with warmth and humour, making her a crowd-pleasing speaker with schools, medical professionals, corporations and agencies throughout North America, Europe and Asia.One of the nation's leading parenting experts, Jennifer Kolari, is a highly sought- after international speaker and the founder of Connected Parenting. A child and family therapist with a busy practice based in San Diego and Toronto, Kolari is also the author of Connected Parenting: How to Raise A Great Kid (Penguin Group USA and Penguin Canada, 2009) and You're Ruining My Life! (But Not Really): Surviving the Teenage Years with Connected Parenting (Penguin Canada, 2011).

Hi Parents! Have you ever mistaken your teen's anger for defiance, only to realize it was anxiety? When teens feel overwhelmed, their emotions can show up as outbursts, leaving parents unsure of how to help. This week, I'm joined by Dr. Roseann Capanna-Hodge, a recognized expert in children's mental health and founder of the Global Institute of Children's Mental Health. With 30 years of experience, she specializes in nervous system dysregulation - a key factor in anxiety, ADHD, OCD, and mood issues. More about Dr. Roseann: A bestselling author and top 1% podcast host, Dr. Roseann is known for her C.A.L.M.S. Dysregulation Protocol™, offering simple, science-backed strategies to help parents support their uniquely wired children. Featured in The New York Times, Forbes, and Parents Magazine, she's passionate about helping kids thrive emotionally, behaviourally, and academically. In this episode, we break down why anxiety can look like anger, what's happening in your teen's brain during emotional outbursts, and how you can help them self-regulate and build resilience. I know you'll walk away with powerful insights!

For some, failure is a motivator, a chance to prove themselves and strive for something even greater. But for others—especially highly sensitive kids, gifted kids, kids with ADHD, or strong-willed Gladiator kids—failure feels catastrophic. Even minor setbacks can trigger overwhelming self-doubt, anxiety, and shame.The truth is, failure is an essential part of growth. It's how we learn, build resilience, and ultimately succeed. But for kids who struggle with stress tolerance, failure can feel like an unbearable weight.In this episode, we'll explore why some children react so strongly to failure, and more importantly, how we as parents can help them shift their perspective. You'll learn strategies to help your child develop stress tolerance, reframe failure as a stepping stone to success, and build the emotional resilience they need to thrive.Let's turn failure into an opportunity for growth—together. Jennifer's Takeaways:Understanding Failure and Its Impact on Children (00:00)Parents' Relationship with Failure (01:58)The Role of Parental Response (04:15)Brain Processes During Failure (04:52)Building Failure Tolerance in Children (08:25)Practical Strategies for Parents (13:55)Challenges and Final Thoughts (14:17)Meet Jennifer KolariJennifer Kolari is the host of the “Connected Parenting” weekly podcast and the co-host of “The Mental Health Comedy” podcast. Kolari is a frequent guest on Nationwide morning shows and podcasts in th US and Canada. Her advice can also be found in many Canadian and US magazines such as; Today's Parent, Parents Magazine and Canadian Family.Kolari's powerful parenting model is based on the neurobiology of love, teaching parents how to use compassion and empathy as powerful medicine to transform challenging behavior and build children's emotional resilience and emotional shock absorbers.Jennifer's wisdom, quick wit and down to earth style help parents navigate modern-day parenting problems, offering real-life examples as well as practical and effective tools and strategies.Her highly entertaining, inspiring workshops are shared with warmth and humour, making her a crowd-pleasing speaker with schools, medical professionals, corporations and agencies throughout North America, Europe and Asia.One of the nation's leading parenting experts, Jennifer Kolari, is a highly sought- after international speaker and the founder of Connected Parenting. A child and family therapist with a busy practice based in San Diego and Toronto, Kolari is also the author of Connected Parenting: How to Raise A Great Kid (Penguin Group USA and Penguin Canada, 2009) and You're Ruining My Life! (But Not Really): Surviving the Teenage Years with Connected Parenting (Penguin Canada, 2011).

Vanessa GordonCEO and PublisherEast End TasteVanessa Gordon is not just a name; she's a powerhouse in the world of culinary travel and lifestyle!As the CEO and Publisher of East End Taste, she curates a digital publication that dives deep into sustainable and international culinary travel, all with a refined focus on seasonal coastal destinations. Her passion for food and travel is palpable, making her a go-to expert for anyone looking to elevate their experiences.In 2018, Vanessa launched the Hamptons Interactive Brunch, an annual summer event series that has become a must-attend gathering for food enthusiasts and notable personalities alike. With her finger on the pulse of the Hamptons lifestyle, Vanessa is frequently sought after for her insights on travel, personal finance, and parenting, making her a trusted voice in these areas.Her expertise has graced the pages of prestigious outlets such as the New York Times, Condé Nast Traveler, BBC Radio, and many more. Whether she's sharing her insights in Success Magazine or contributing to Parents Magazine and Psychology Today, Vanessa's writing resonates with a diverse audience, inspiring them to embrace a life filled with adventure and mindful living.With a Master of Arts degree from NYU's Steinhardt School of Education and enriching experiences at the University of Oxford, Vanessa combines academic excellence with real-world expertise. She's not just a writer; she's an engaging storyteller and on-air talent who brings her experiences to life.https://eastendtastemagazine.com/the-secret-recipe-behind-the-yucatans-famous-huevos-motulenos/summaryIn this episode of the Big World Made Small podcast, host Jason Elkins speaks with Vanessa Gordon, CEO and publisher of East End Taste. They discuss Vanessa's journey from teaching English abroad to founding her own culinary publication focused on the Hamptons and beyond. The conversation explores the importance of events in marketing, the role of food in travel experiences, and the unique culinary adventures Vanessa has encountered during her travels. Listeners gain insights into the value of East End Taste and the diverse cultural influences that shape the culinary landscape of the Hamptons.takeawaysEast End Taste is a publication founded in 2016 focusing on culinary experiences.Vanessa's journey includes teaching ESL and freelance writing before starting her own business.Events play a crucial role in marketing and building brand recognition.Traveling internationally has expanded Vanessa's culinary perspective.Food is a central theme in adventure travel and cultural exploration.Vanessa emphasizes the importance of being a trusted source for local experiences.The Hamptons has a rich history and diverse cultural influences.Unique culinary experiences can challenge perceptions of food.Vanessa is planning trips for her audience to explore culinary destinations.Engaging with the audience through social media is vital for building community. Learn more about Big World Made Small Adventure Travel Marketing and join our private community to get episode updates, special access to our guests, and exclusive adventure travel offers on our website.

Every child faces challenges when it comes to stepping outside their comfort zone—whether it's trying a new food, petting an unfamiliar dog, or speaking up in class.But what if we could gently guide them to embrace these moments of bravery? Imagine the confidence they could build and the doors that could open when they learn to navigate the unknown.In this week's replay, we explore how to strengthen your child's courage muscle, especially for those who are naturally hesitant. You'll learn practical strategies to help them take small, meaningful risks that lead to greater confidence, joy, and resilience.Jennifer's Takeaways:Building a Child's Courage Muscle (00:00)Starting the Conversation and Setting Small Goals (03:08)The Role of Imagination and Visualization (04:34)Acting It Out and Maintaining a Playful Approach (06:29)Parental Support and Neutrality (07:26)Creating an Accomplishment Book (09:13)The Long-Term Nature of Parenting (10:07)The Importance of Risk-Taking and Growth (10:57)Resources and Support (11:39)Meet Jennifer KolariJennifer Kolari is the host of the “Connected Parenting” weekly podcast and the co-host of “The Mental Health Comedy” podcast. Kolari is a frequent guest on Nationwide morning shows and podcasts in th US and Canada. Her advice can also be found in many Canadian and US magazines such as; Today's Parent, Parents Magazine and Canadian Family.Kolari's powerful parenting model is based on the neurobiology of love, teaching parents how to use compassion and empathy as powerful medicine to transform challenging behavior and build children's emotional resilience and emotional shock absorbers.Jennifer's wisdom, quick wit and down to earth style help parents navigate modern-day parenting problems, offering real-life examples as well as practical and effective tools and strategies.Her highly entertaining, inspiring workshops are shared with warmth and humour, making her a crowd-pleasing speaker with schools, medical professionals, corporations and agencies throughout North America, Europe and Asia.One of the nation's leading parenting experts, Jennifer Kolari, is a highly sought- after international speaker and the founder of Connected Parenting. A child and family therapist with a busy practice based in San Diego and Toronto, Kolari is also the author of Connected Parenting: How to Raise A Great Kid (Penguin Group USA and Penguin Canada, 2009) and You're Ruining My Life! (But Not Really): Surviving the Teenage Years with Connected Parenting (Penguin Canada, 2011).

On today's episode of The Wholesome Fertility Podcast, I am joined by the incredible Dr. Alice Domar, a pioneer in the field of mind-body medicine and a leader in reproductive health psychology. Dr. Domar shares insights from her decades of research and work with patients experiencing infertility, diving deep into the emotional and physical toll of fertility challenges and how stress can impact reproductive outcomes. We discuss the groundbreaking research that links stress reduction to increased fertility success rates, the importance of patient-centered care, and how mind-body practices can transform the fertility journey. Dr. Domar also shares her thoughts on spirituality, the power of connection, and how fostering a sense of belonging can help patients navigate the emotional rollercoaster of infertility. This episode is packed with valuable insights and hope for anyone on the fertility journey. Be sure to tune in as you won't want to miss this eye-opening and inspiring conversation! Key takeaways: Stress significantly impacts reproductive outcomes, and reducing stress can improve success rates in fertility treatments. Research shows infertility patients often experience anxiety and depression levels similar to those with major illnesses like cancer or heart disease. The brain and body are constantly connected, and managing stress through mind-body strategies can positively influence fertility. Connecting with spirituality or a higher power can help individuals cope with the emotional challenges of infertility. Isolation is common for those facing infertility, but connecting with support groups or programs can provide invaluable relief and healing. Cutting-edge research using physiological devices to measure stress in real-time may revolutionize how stress is addressed during fertility treatments. Empathy, connection, and compassionate care are essential for improving the patient experience and outcomes. Guest Bio: Alice “Ali” Domar, Ph.D. is a pioneer in mind-body medicine, focusing on the relationship between stress, medical conditions, and lifestyle habits. She is Chief Compassion Officer at Inception Fertility, part-time associate professor at Harvard Medical School, and senior staff psychologist at Beth Israel Deaconess Medical Center. Dr. Domar is the author of Conquering Infertility and Finding Calm for the Expectant Mom and serves on advisory boards for Parents Magazine, Resolve, and Easy Eats. Her work has been featured in Redbook, Health, and BeWell.com. Websites/Social Media Links: https://www.instagram.com/inceptionfertility/ https://inceptionfertility.com/about-us/our-team/ https://www.preludefertility.com/  

Welcome back, Connected Parents, to another episode of the Connected Parenting Podcast! Today, we're diving into another installment of our Q&A series, where I answer real parenting questions from our listeners.In this episode, I'll be tackling two important questions:Rob's Question: His 14-year-old son has developed a mean-spirited sense of humor and is acting like a bit of a jerk. How can Rob guide him toward kindness without shutting him down completely?Lily's Question: Her 12-year-old daughter is struggling with a new school friendship. She initially bonded with a classmate who seemed nice but has now become overly clingy, sending constant text messages and guilt-tripping her. How can Lily help her daughter set boundaries while maintaining kindness?Join me as we explore strategies for fostering emotional intelligence, setting healthy boundaries, and helping kids navigate social dynamics in a way that strengthens their confidence and relationships. Tune in now! And don't forget to send in your parenting questions for future episodes.Meet Jennifer KolariJennifer Kolari is the host of the “Connected Parenting” weekly podcast and the co-host of “The Mental Health Comedy” podcast. Kolari is a frequent guest on Nationwide morning shows and podcasts in th US and Canada. Her advice can also be found in many Canadian and US magazines such as; Today's Parent, Parents Magazine and Canadian Family.Kolari's powerful parenting model is based on the neurobiology of love, teaching parents how to use compassion and empathy as powerful medicine to transform challenging behavior and build children's emotional resilience and emotional shock absorbers.Jennifer's wisdom, quick wit and down to earth style help parents navigate modern-day parenting problems, offering real-life examples as well as practical and effective tools and strategies.Her highly entertaining, inspiring workshops are shared with warmth and humour, making her a crowd-pleasing speaker with schools, medical professionals, corporations and agencies throughout North America, Europe and Asia.One of the nation's leading parenting experts, Jennifer Kolari, is a highly sought- after international speaker and the founder of Connected Parenting. A child and family therapist with a busy practice based in San Diego and Toronto, Kolari is also the author of Connected Parenting: How to Raise A Great Kid (Penguin Group USA and Penguin Canada, 2009) and You're Ruining My Life! (But Not Really): Surviving the Teenage Years with Connected Parenting (Penguin Canada, 2011).

I've had many requests from listeners asking for a refresher on the CALM Technique, and while I often direct people to earlier episodes, I think it's time to go over it again.In this episode, we'll break down how to use the CALM Technique effectively, especially when dealing with teenage boys, who can sometimes be a little more challenging to connect with.Whether you're parenting a fiery toddler, a sensitive pre-teen, or a moody adolescent, this episode will provide practical examples and real-life scenarios to help you de-escalate conflicts, improve communication, and strengthen your relationship with your child.|If your child isn't a teen yet—don't worry, they will be soon! And if you have daughters, this technique is universally helpful for all kids.Tune in for a deep dive into CALM and how to apply it in everyday parenting.In today's episode, we'll explore:Introduction to the Calm Technique and Oxytocin (00:00)The Four Steps of the Calm Technique (03:35)Scenarios and Practical Applications (08:25)Advanced Techniques and Tips (23:01)Meet Jennifer KolariJennifer Kolari is the host of the “Connected Parenting” weekly podcast and the co-host of “The Mental Health Comedy” podcast. Kolari is a frequent guest on Nationwide morning shows and podcasts in th US and Canada. Her advice can also be found in many Canadian and US magazines such as; Today's Parent, Parents Magazine and Canadian Family.Kolari's powerful parenting model is based on the neurobiology of love, teaching parents how to use compassion and empathy as powerful medicine to transform challenging behavior and build children's emotional resilience and emotional shock absorbers.Jennifer's wisdom, quick wit and down to earth style help parents navigate modern-day parenting problems, offering real-life examples as well as practical and effective tools and strategies.Her highly entertaining, inspiring workshops are shared with warmth and humour, making her a crowd-pleasing speaker with schools, medical professionals, corporations and agencies throughout North America, Europe and Asia.One of the nation's leading parenting experts, Jennifer Kolari, is a highly sought- after international speaker and the founder of Connected Parenting. A child and family therapist with a busy practice based in San Diego and Toronto, Kolari is also the author of Connected Parenting: How to Raise A Great Kid (Penguin Group USA and Penguin Canada, 2009) and You're Ruining My Life! (But Not Really): Surviving the Teenage Years with Connected Parenting (Penguin Canada, 2011).

In this episode, we're flipping the script. We spend so much time worrying about our kids' screen time, but what about our own? The truth is, our relationship with our devices is affecting our focus, emotional health, and ability to be present for our children. And let's be real—our kids are watching. Have you ever tried to watch a show without checking your phone? Or read a book for more than five minutes before feeling the urge to scroll? If this sounds familiar, you're not alone. In today's episode, we'll explore:Breaking Up with Your Phone: Introduction and Context (00:00)The Impact of Social Media and News Consumption (01:21)Understanding the Pleasure-Pain Continuum and Addiction (04:08)Practical Steps to Break Up with Your Phone (06:01)Tracking Screen Time and Setting Boundaries (09:03)Meet Jennifer KolariJennifer Kolari is the host of the “Connected Parenting” weekly podcast and the co-host of “The Mental Health Comedy” podcast. Kolari is a frequent guest on Nationwide morning shows and podcasts in th US and Canada. Her advice can also be found in many Canadian and US magazines such as; Today's Parent, Parents Magazine and Canadian Family.Kolari's powerful parenting model is based on the neurobiology of love, teaching parents how to use compassion and empathy as powerful medicine to transform challenging behavior and build children's emotional resilience and emotional shock absorbers.Jennifer's wisdom, quick wit and down to earth style help parents navigate modern-day parenting problems, offering real-life examples as well as practical and effective tools and strategies.Her highly entertaining, inspiring workshops are shared with warmth and humour, making her a crowd-pleasing speaker with schools, medical professionals, corporations and agencies throughout North America, Europe and Asia.One of the nation's leading parenting experts, Jennifer Kolari, is a highly sought- after international speaker and the founder of Connected Parenting. A child and family therapist with a busy practice based in San Diego and Toronto, Kolari is also the author of Connected Parenting: How to Raise A Great Kid (Penguin Group USA and Penguin Canada, 2009) and You're Ruining My Life! (But Not Really): Surviving the Teenage Years with Connected Parenting (Penguin Canada, 2011).

Welcome back, connected parents, to another episode of the Connected Parenting podcast! Today, we're tackling a topic that many parents find incredibly frustrating—arguing with a teenager—but with a modern twist: the influence social media has on these conflicts.Teenagers have always been challenging to argue with. Conversations can escalate from zero to 100 in seconds, leaving you feeling completely disoriented. But in today's digital world, there's a new layer—the language of social media-driven psychology. Many teens are now using terms they've picked up online, like gaslighting, victim-playing, and toxic behavior, sometimes without fully understanding their meaning. While it's great that mental health topics are more widely discussed, these concepts are often taken out of context and misapplied in everyday parent-teen interactions.So how do we navigate these conversations without making things worse? In this episode, we'll dig into building connection, strengthening trust, and helping our teens develop a healthy understanding of the emotions and relationships in their lives.Jennifer's Takeaways:Challenges of Arguing with Teenagers in the Age of Social Media (00:00)Understanding the Teenage Brain (03:05)Impact of Social Media on Parent-Teen Interactions (07:12)Navigating Complex Concepts in Parent-Teen Arguments (10:25)Strategies for Staying Calm and Neutral (11:37)The Role of Self-Awareness and Responsibility (17:24)Resources and Support for Connected Parenting (24:33)Meet Jennifer KolariJennifer Kolari is the host of the “Connected Parenting” weekly podcast and the co-host of “The Mental Health Comedy” podcast. Kolari is a frequent guest on Nationwide morning shows and podcasts in th US and Canada. Her advice can also be found in many Canadian and US magazines such as; Today's Parent, Parents Magazine and Canadian Family.Kolari's powerful parenting model is based on the neurobiology of love, teaching parents how to use compassion and empathy as powerful medicine to transform challenging behavior and build children's emotional resilience and emotional shock absorbers.Jennifer's wisdom, quick wit and down to earth style help parents navigate modern-day parenting problems, offering real-life examples as well as practical and effective tools and strategies.Her highly entertaining, inspiring workshops are shared with warmth and humour, making her a crowd-pleasing speaker with schools, medical professionals, corporations and agencies throughout North America, Europe and Asia.One of the nation's leading parenting experts, Jennifer Kolari, is a highly sought- after international speaker and the founder of Connected Parenting. A child and family therapist with a busy practice based in San Diego and Toronto, Kolari is also the author of Connected Parenting: How to Raise A Great Kid (Penguin Group USA and Penguin Canada, 2009) and You're Ruining My Life! (But Not Really): Surviving the Teenage Years with Connected Parenting (Penguin Canada, 2011).

Negative consequences—while the term might sound harsh, the reality is that some kids truly thrive when they know they are surrounded by sturdy, solid, immovable limits.There are certain children, especially strong-willed or "gladiator" kids as I call them, who push back against every boundary—insisting they don't need rules, testing limits at every turn, and even retaliating when consequences are enforced. However, despite their resistance, clear, consistent, and loving boundaries actually make them feel safer and more emotionally regulated.If you've ever felt guilty about enforcing consequences or struggled to set limits that actually work, this episode is for you. Tune in and learn how to create a structured and supportive environment where your child can thrive.Jennifer's Takeaways:Setting the Stage for Negative Consequences (00:00)Understanding Anxiety in Kids (02:06)The Importance of Consistent Limits (04:32)Setting Effective Consequences (06:24)Practical Tips for Implementing Consequences (07:56)Connecting Before Correcting (14:48)Resources and Support for Parents (15:39)Meet Jennifer KolariJennifer Kolari is the host of the “Connected Parenting” weekly podcast and the co-host of “The Mental Health Comedy” podcast. Kolari is a frequent guest on Nationwide morning shows and podcasts in th US and Canada. Her advice can also be found in many Canadian and US magazines such as; Today's Parent, Parents Magazine and Canadian Family.Kolari's powerful parenting model is based on the neurobiology of love, teaching parents how to use compassion and empathy as powerful medicine to transform challenging behavior and build children's emotional resilience and emotional shock absorbers.Jennifer's wisdom, quick wit and down to earth style help parents navigate modern-day parenting problems, offering real-life examples as well as practical and effective tools and strategies.Her highly entertaining, inspiring workshops are shared with warmth and humour, making her a crowd-pleasing speaker with schools, medical professionals, corporations and agencies throughout North America, Europe and Asia.One of the nation's leading parenting experts, Jennifer Kolari, is a highly sought- after international speaker and the founder of Connected Parenting. A child and family therapist with a busy practice based in San Diego and Toronto, Kolari is also the author of Connected Parenting: How to Raise A Great Kid (Penguin Group USA and Penguin Canada, 2009) and You're Ruining My Life! (But Not Really): Surviving the Teenage Years with Connected Parenting (Penguin Canada, 2011).

Parenting can be a beautiful journey, but it often brings challenges that strain relationships. From the demands of daily life to the push-and-pull dynamics of kids testing boundaries, the connection between parents can sometimes feel like it's taking a back seat.In this week's episode I explore how vital it is to protect and prioritize this bond, emphasizing that a strong relationship between parents doesn't just benefit you—it's a gift to your children. Kids thrive when they see their parents working as a team, and how division or tension can create stress and confusion in the family dynamic.Listen in to learn practical strategies to reconnect, communicate effectively, and maintain a sense of partnership even during the busiest times. Whether it's setting aside time to nurture your relationship, finding ways to support each other even in small ways, or understanding the role of teamwork in parenting, this episode is packed with insights to help you strengthen your parenting partnership and create a harmonious family environment for everyone involved.Jennifer's Takeaways:Importance of a United Parental Front (00:00)Challenges in Two-Parent Families (01:21)The Impact of Parental Relationship on Children (02:30)Recognizing and Responding to Bids for Attention (03:56)Changing the Lens and Spending Adult Time Alone (05:39)The Importance of Date Night (07:41)Using the Calm Technique and Avoiding Policing (09:09)Meet Jennifer KolariJennifer Kolari is the host of the “Connected Parenting” weekly podcast and the co-host of “The Mental Health Comedy” podcast. Kolari is a frequent guest on Nationwide morning shows and podcasts in th US and Canada. Her advice can also be found in many Canadian and US magazines such as; Today's Parent, Parents Magazine and Canadian Family.Kolari's powerful parenting model is based on the neurobiology of love, teaching parents how to use compassion and empathy as powerful medicine to transform challenging behavior and build children's emotional resilience and emotional shock absorbers.Jennifer's wisdom, quick wit and down to earth style help parents navigate modern-day parenting problems, offering real-life examples as well as practical and effective tools and strategies.Her highly entertaining, inspiring workshops are shared with warmth and humour, making her a crowd-pleasing speaker with schools, medical professionals, corporations and agencies throughout North America, Europe and Asia.One of the nation's leading parenting experts, Jennifer Kolari, is a highly sought- after international speaker and the founder of Connected Parenting. A child and family therapist with a busy practice based in San Diego and Toronto, Kolari is also the author of Connected Parenting: How to Raise A Great Kid (Penguin Group USA and Penguin Canada, 2009) and You're Ruining My Life! (But Not Really): Surviving the Teenage Years with Connected Parenting (Penguin Canada, 2011).

Welcome to the first Connected Parenting episode of 2025! After spending the holidays with my family, I'm excited to reconnect with all of you. The holidays are often a mix of joy, warmth, and togetherness, but they can also bring tension, big feelings, and unresolved conflicts. As Ram Dass so wisely put it, "If you think you're enlightened, go spend a week with your family." In this episode, we explore how to navigate those lingering emotions and patterns that surface during family gatherings, especially as we enter a new year.Jennifer's Takeaways:Reflecting on Family Dynamics and Emotional Programs (00:00)Understanding Implicit Beliefs and Their Impact (01:29)The Role of Parents as Substitute Frontal Lobes (05:44)Practical Steps to Manage Implicit Beliefs (07:35)Inner Child Work and Self-Care (12:45)Meet Jennifer KolariJennifer Kolari is the host of the “Connected Parenting” weekly podcast and the co-host of “The Mental Health Comedy” podcast. Kolari is a frequent guest on Nationwide morning shows and podcasts in th US and Canada. Her advice can also be found in many Canadian and US magazines such as; Today's Parent, Parents Magazine and Canadian Family.Kolari's powerful parenting model is based on the neurobiology of love, teaching parents how to use compassion and empathy as powerful medicine to transform challenging behavior and build children's emotional resilience and emotional shock absorbers.Jennifer's wisdom, quick wit and down to earth style help parents navigate modern-day parenting problems, offering real-life examples as well as practical and effective tools and strategies.Her highly entertaining, inspiring workshops are shared with warmth and humour, making her a crowd-pleasing speaker with schools, medical professionals, corporations and agencies throughout North America, Europe and Asia.One of the nation's leading parenting experts, Jennifer Kolari, is a highly sought- after international speaker and the founder of Connected Parenting. A child and family therapist with a busy practice based in San Diego and Toronto, Kolari is also the author of Connected Parenting: How to Raise A Great Kid (Penguin Group USA and Penguin Canada, 2009) and You're Ruining My Life! (But Not Really): Surviving the Teenage Years with Connected Parenting (Penguin Canada, 2011).