With Pleasure

We are BACK with a very special episode series for you!!   If you've been plugged into our community for the last six months or so, you're probably aware that we've been going through a major metamorphosis over here at Desire on Fire. Releasing scarcity, fear and control so we can open to being held by and receiving from the masculine on a wholeee new level.   And Ellie's husband Rob has been a key player who has catalyzed and supported this deep transformation (while simultaneously undergoing his own changes + awakening!).   So, we invited Rob onto the podcast so that we can dive deep with him, and really let you into the behind-the-scenes of this journey of what it's REALLY looked like for each of us (the messy, real and raw!)   In this episode, Rob opens up about his own journey of healing, personal growth and finding coherence.   Rob shares how the power of masculine and feminine energies has helped him overcome generational wounds, enabling him to break free from harmful cycles, and helped him become the amazing husband and father that he is today—as well as his passion for bringing this work to the world, to impact future generations.   Get ready to be moved by Rob's story!   In this episode, you'll learn:    What past experiences changed Robert's life How one tough family dinner conversation showed the need for healing Why it doesn't end with addressing relationship issues and why it needs commitment How the “Sacred Initiation” retreat was the ‘setup' he needed  The unfolding of the ‘medicine for the collective' What shaped his new life principles as husband and father Explore our website: https://www.desireonfire.com/ Come and join our FB community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/DesireOnFire/ And connect with us on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/desireonfire/   Connect with Aimee: Check out my instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/aimeebatuski/   Connect with Ellie: Check out my instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/elliemontgomerie  

To listen to Jordan Candlish now, you might never guess he was once an ambitious  ladder-climber in the corporate accounting world.    To the outside world, he was the picture of success: achievement, stability, recognition.    But deep down, he knew that staying in that world and doing things the way everyone else did them was actually playing small and safe with his life. He knew he was meant for more.    So he took the leap into his own healing and evolution, and it's never been more clear to him that he made the right choice.    Today, Jordan facilitates The Path, a men's coaching program that helps men heal old wounds, open up new possibilities and true purpose, and gain the maturity and confidence they need to live full-on in their lives and relationships.   Aimee sat down with Jordan in Austin for a wide-ranging and intimate conversation about why men's personal growth work matters now more than ever, and why healthy brotherhood is so essential for men to thrive.    What you'll learn in this episode: How Jordan went from high-powered corporate life to coaching men Who he had to disappoint — and why he got okay with it What propelled him into this work The main issues that get addressed when coaching men Jordan's view of porn (and what he thinks men should do) How he deals with controversy, failure, and criticism Come join us Oct. 13-15 at Desire On Fire Experience LIVE in gorgeous Austin, TX! Get 50% off your ticket when you use the code COMMUNITY. https://www.desireonfirelive.com/desireonfire-experience   Explore our website: https://www.desireonfire.com/ Come and join our FB community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/DesireOnFire/ And connect with us on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/desireonfire/   Connect with Aimee: Check out my instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/aimeebatuski/

In today's episode we sat down with our client and a college friend of Aimee's, Makayla Davis.    She's in one of our all-time favorite photos taken at a Desire On Fire Live event. She's crying, fully immersed in a private moment of reckoning, and she's holding the hand of her good friend.    It's an image that perfectly encapsulates what we do and why we're here: to help women thaw out, connect deeply with their aliveness in every area of life, and do it all together, held in a powerful container of real sisterhood.    What Makayla reveals in today's conversation is that that moment happened at last year's Desire On Fire experience, in response to a question from Ellie onstage.    For 30 years, she had been standing on the sidelines with her desires. When she reconnected with Aimee on social media and started seeing her posts, she experienced a whole range of feelings: judgment, envy, resistance, curiosity.    The loudest message in her head was: That's not for you. For someone else, maybe, but not for you.     Today we sat down with Makayla to get the whole story — what brought her here, what held her back at first, what had her finally say “yes,” and why that's made all the difference for her in her life, work, and relationships.    Makayla's journey is perfectly her own, and also super relatable. She's finally finding her center; discovering what it's like to look people in the eye for the first time and ask for what she wants; practicing saying what needs to be said, even when it's hard and messy; and finally buying lingerie.    It's been a year of small steps that have added up to big transformation, with so much more ahead. If you're wondering if this work is for you, or you're curious but stuck because it feels way to edgy or taboo to talk about these things — we think you're going to love this conversation.   In this episode, you'll learn:  All the doubts, judgments, and fears that kept Makayla on the sidelines for so long… and what finally had her jump in The question on the first day that changed everything for her What's shifted for her in the year since she said yes to Desire On Fire Come join us Oct. 13-15 at Desire On Fire Experience LIVE in gorgeous Austin, TX! Get 50% off your ticket when you use the code COMMUNITY. https://www.desireonfirelive.com/desireonfire-experience   Explore our website: https://www.desireonfire.com/ Come and join our FB community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/DesireOnFire/ And connect with us on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/desireonfire/   Connect with Aimee: Check out my instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/aimeebatuski/   Connect with Ellie: Check out my instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/elliemontgomerie   Connect with Makayla at Awaken Coaches: https://www.awakencoaches.com/

We love to hear from our community, and we love to share stories and breakthroughs with you! This work all happens inside of real lives… and there's no better way to understand its transformative power than hearing directly from the women who have been through our programs and events.   Last year, Prudence Stein-Greene was a successful real estate agent in LA — an extremely high-stress and high-drive industry.   At the time, she was struggling with a business decision, so when a friend invited Prudence to attend our Desire on Fire Experience live in LA, she said yes, thinking it would be a great opportunity to have a business breakthrough.    There was something else, something bigger that was underneath her reason for saying yes to DOFE: she was completely, utterly exhausted. With everything.   Her work was incredibly demanding. She was burning out and missing out on coveted time with her kids. She had no connection at all to what she even wanted — in her work, in her marriage, in her life. She resorted to controlling things and people around her, including her husband, blaming him for her dissatisfaction and why their marriage wasn't aligned.    Her friend encouraged her to spring for the hotel room, get away, and really devote herself to the work that weekend. She took the leap.   What happened in those couple of days changed everything. She had the business breakthrough… and a whole lot more.    We know you're going to love this conversation with Prudence. You'll get a real-life, down to earth take on what this work is, who it's for, what it can do for you, and why we are SO passionate about getting women in a room together for this experience!     In this episode, you'll learn:    What her fears were coming into the event The powerful breakthrough she experienced — and what it led to when she returned home What's different for her now in her life, work, and relationships  The big change she made that has allowed her to expand her ability to hold sensation in her body The next steps she took after DOFE to fully claim her purpose, joy + passion Come join us Oct. 13-15 at Desire On Fire Experience LIVE in gorgeous Austin, TX! Get 50% off your ticket when you use the code COMMUNITY. https://www.desireonfirelive.com/desireonfire-experience   Explore our website: https://www.desireonfire.com/ Come and join our FB community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/DesireOnFire/ And connect with us on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/desireonfire/   Connect with Aimee: Check out my instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/aimeebatuski/   Connect with Ellie: Check out my instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/elliemontgomerie

Have you ever had a moment in your life when all your pain and accompanying coping mechanisms finally caught up with you?    When you finally saw with total clarity that if you wanted to be able to have any kind of happiness in life, you'd have to face that pain and find healing?    Our guest today is the relationship and intimacy coach Stefanos Sifandos — and he shares how that moment of getting “caught” forced him to reckon with a lifetime of abuse, fear, shame, and insecurity… and how that moment opened him up to the possibility of real love, deep connection, profound growth, and BIG impact on the world.    Today Stefanos is a husband and happy new dad, and in his work with individuals and couples, he helps people on the journey to loving all the parts of themselves that they've been trying to run from and getting back into healthy relationship with the core of what matters most to them.    And as he says: You can't run a new life from an old blueprint — and that applies to healing, surrender, intimacy, becoming a parent, and any kind of major personal transformation.    If you've been on the verge of big change, and you know the time is right to face and heal your past, we think you'll be deeply inspired by this heartfelt conversation with Stefanos!  What you'll learn in this episode:  Where Stefanos got his start in transformational work How and why becoming a parent can feel like a “regression” in personal growth How shame holds us back – and what happens when we finally drop it Practical tips for balancing your nervous system when you're in anxiety & shame How commitment actually leads to feeling more free Join The Pleasure Revolution: a live, 5-day guided experience for those who are ready to release the hustle and see how much more you can magnetize with your feminine energy leading the way. Join Us Here: https://bit.ly/TPRpodcast Explore our website: https://www.desireonfire.com/ Come and join our FB community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/DesireOnFire/ And connect with us on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/desireonfire/   Connect with Aimee: Check out my instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/aimeebatuski/   Connect with Ellie: Check out my instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/elliemontgomerie   Connect with Stefanos:  Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/stefanossifandos/ Website: https://stefanossifandos.com/  

We've taken a break from our podcast lately — not because we don't love it, but because we realized we just needed to pull back on some aspects of the business to make room for all the change that's been swirling around us.    So today we're back, and we're sharing a deep-dive conversation about what's been going on in the business, in our relationships, and in our own personal growth as we navigate our transition to Austin together.    As we let the conversation flow, here's a theme that kept arising:    We are both deeply committed to practicing what we preach, and one of the most powerful opportunities we get to do that is when things are not working for us.    It's when we get stuck in “obligation” energy that we have the chance to reconnect authentically with a desire-led life.    It's when our most intimate relationships are experiencing their biggest challenges that we get to lean into radical honesty, sisterhood, and surrender.    It's when life doesn't meet our expectations that we have the choice to either stay stuck in judgment and resentment… or move into looking at all the patterns that aren't serving us and find the true medicine.   Choosing desire as a way of life is not easy. It will bring up ALL your shit and bring you to your knees.    And as we keep finding: it's also the key to unlocking a quality of freedom and joy in life that we couldn't even have imagined.    So listen in and catch up with us today!        What you'll learn in this episode:    Navigating the complexity of living together as friends and business partners Aimee is confronted by her desire to go to Bali Why conscious relating is not for the faint of heart How to find the gold in situations that aren't meeting your expectations   What it means to surrender when you're in the middle of true pain + challenge Discerning when it's time to surrender, and when it's time to speak up A sneak peek into Amy's most recent Tantric experience   Explore our website: https://www.desireonfire.com/ Come and join our FB community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/DesireOnFire/ And connect with us on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/desireonfire/   Connect with Aimee: Check out my instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/aimeebatuski/   Connect with Ellie: Check out my instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/elliemontgomerie  

One of the things that consistently brings women into the Desire On Fire community is shame.    Shame around sex for sure — wanting it, knowing what you want, asking out loud for what you want (often the most difficult and vulnerable part of our journey).    But it's not just about sexual shame. It's also about shame around all kinds of desire — for any kind of pleasure, fun, abundance, agency, freedom, or satisfaction.    Where does this shame come from? And how is it that even people who were raised outside of traditional religious environments and in sex-positive families (like Aimee and Ellie) still carry trauma and fear around sex and desire?    Our guests today have a unique perspective, because they grew up inside the conservative evangelical structures that gave rise to purity culture.    And through the long journey of exploration, unlearning, and finally being trained as sex therapists themselves, they've found a way forward towards healing, freedom, and wholeness — not just in their sex lives, but in the fullness of all kinds of desire.     If you grew up in purity culture (and spoiler alert: we all feel the effects of this paradigm, whether we grew up with religion or not), we think you'll find this conversation with Juila Postema and Jeremiah Gibson to be enlightening and deeply encouraging.    Julia and Jeremiah are currently the hosts of the Sexvangelicals, a sexual health podcast and education platform with the mission to support relationships in reclaiming sexuality following adverse religious experiences.   What you'll learn in this episode:  How Julia and Jeremiah found their way to freedom (and to each other) What exactly is purity culture?  How purity culture affects even non-religious people Why early + clear conversations around sex, pleasure, and desire are so important How you can begin your journey to break free from sexual shame   Explore our website: https://www.desireonfire.com/ Come and join our FB community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/DesireOnFire/ And connect with us on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/desireonfire/   Connect with Aimee: Check out my instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/aimeebatuski/   Connect with Ellie: Check out my instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/elliemontgomerie   Connect with Julia and Jeremiah: Sexvangelicals website Julia and Jeremiah on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/sexvangelicals/ Sexvangelicals podcast   People + resources mentioned in this episode: DOF Episode with Elena Rossi on sexual healing after trauma AASECT (American Association of Sexual Educators, Counselors, and Therapists) Multi-Orgasmic Man, by Mantak Chia Extended Massive Orgasm, by Steve Bodansky Dr. Wednesday Martin Sexvangelicals podcast episode with Kara Haug - Reframing Our Stories   Apple Podcasts summary:  If you grew up in purity culture (and spoiler alert: we all feel the effects of this paradigm, whether we grew up with religion or not), we think you'll find this conversation with Juila Postema and Jeremiah Gibson to be enlightening and deeply encouraging.    Julia and Jeremiah are currently the hosts of the Sexvangelicals, a sexual health podcast and education platform with the mission to support relationships in reclaiming sexuality following adverse religious experiences.   We're looking at the roots of purity culture, its far-reaching effects on everything we do — and how to find healing and freedom in truth, love, and community. 

You know how we love to invite men onto our podcast, and today's guest brings a ton of depth, insight, and honesty around the male perspective.    Kevin Hermann is a highly skilled and experienced coach, specializing in business, leadership, and life coaching. He's led over 25 in-person retreats (that's a LOT of retreats!!).   But so much more than all these credentials and accomplishments, what you get from Kevin is just the transparency he brings to this conversation. He shares openly about being newly engaged and monogamous, what this new level of commitment has brought up in his relationship… and so much more!   If you've ever been curious about men's work — what it is, what it isn't, how it's changing — then this episode is for you.    You'll hear about what men are struggling with the most, what they need the most, and how connecting at a deeper level with themselves and other men is essential for their growth and wellbeing. (Sound familiar? We say the same about sisterhood all the time!)     You can find Kevin on Instagram where he's riffing on the evolution of the masculine and exploring the connection between style and spirituality.   What you'll learn in this episode:    What Kevin thinks about polarity — its benefits and challenges for men and women How Kevin responds to the question, Where are all the good men?  Why you can't push your man into being in a men's group (and a better way to introduce it)    Explore our website: https://www.desireonfire.com/ Come and join our FB community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/DesireOnFire/ And connect with us on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/desireonfire/   Connect with Aimee: Check out my instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/aimeebatuski/   Connect with Ellie: Check out my instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/elliemontgomerie   Connect with Kevin: Kevin's Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/kev_hermann/ Kevin's website: https://www.kevinhermann.com/ Kevin on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/kevinhermann/   People + resources mentioned in this episode: Dan Doty: https://dandoty.com/ David Dieda's The Way of the Superior Man Groups recommended by Kevin: Everyman   ManKind Project Sacred Sons Man UNcivilized ManTalks  

We've got another incredible Inner Circle Q&A call for you today!    As so often happens, there is a common thread that winds its way through all these powerful shares today.    Whether it's being a caretaker for an ailing family member, dealing with old patterns in your family dynamics, navigating the fear and tenderness of a new relationship, or living in the tension of taking on bold new things…    … today's brave women are all dealing in some way or another with what it means to jump in bravely, with total honesty and vulnerability, and then trust the Universe to give you what's best for you.    If you're seeking a straight shot of spiritual connection… then this episode is for you!    These calls are like parachuting right into the heart of why spirituality + sisterhood are SO important for transformation.    There is so much gold in these calls, and we're excited to share this one with you!    What you'll learn in this episode:    What it looks like to finally stop playing games and manipulating men What you might be fundamentally misunderstanding about vulnerability in relationships Why money made in the energy of turn-on + alignment goes WAY farther than money made from force or obligation   Explore our website: https://www.desireonfire.com/ Come and join our FB community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/DesireOnFire/ And connect with us on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/desireonfire/   Connect with Aimee: Check out my instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/aimeebatuski/   Connect with Ellie: Check out my instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/elliemontgomerie   Lynne Forrest's Victim Triangle Lynne Forrest's book, Guiding Principles for Life Beyond Victim Consciousness Alison Armstrong  

In her “before doing the work” life, this is what Tanai Milgram said about herself: My whole life, I was so proud that no guy ever hurt me, that I was always the one to run away or catch the asshole before he hurt me.    She'd left a trail of dozens of broken hearts in her wake … but she felt more alone and angry than ever.    Like a lot of girls, Tanai grew up with the conditioning that it wasn't okay for her to express her full range of emotion. Being kind, sweet, and compliant was rewarded. But expressing things like anger, disappointment, deep sorrow, shame, or even ecstatic joy — these were on the “not approved” list.    In this conversation, Tanai and I get to the very heart of why we close off so much, the price we pay for our silence and withholding, and what miracles start to happen when we FINALLY give ourselves permission to be fully self-expressed.    I think you'll find SO much to relate to here — the anger and resentment, the pain of not holding good boundaries, the absolute terror of being seen, the ways our bodies are constantly trying to send us signals, and the wild journey we're all on.    Today, Tanai is a Women's Intimacy Coach, podcast host, and somatic trauma healer. She's helped hundreds of women be unapologetically self-expressed in their relationships, using different styles of coaching, somatic meditations, retreats, and feminine embodiment practices.   And in her “after doing the work” life, she knows that the key to finding true, lasting love is — paradoxically — allowing yourself to be heartbroken. Tune in today to receive this juicy wisdom!    In this episode, you'll learn: All about Tanai's exciting journey and how she got where she is today What happens in our bodies and our lives when we repress our anger How her pussy was trying to communicate with her — and what happened when she finally listened The moment on a DoF retreat that was the turning point for her Why sisterhood matters so much — even if your “issue” is with men The key to finally attracting the kinds of men you say you want   Explore our website: https://www.desireonfire.com/ Come and join our FB community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/DesireOnFire/ And connect with us on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/desireonfire/   Connect with Aimee: Check out my instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/aimeebatuski/   Connect with Ellie: Check out my instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/elliemontgomerie Connect with Tanai: Check out Tanai's Instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/tanaimilgram Tanai's website: https://www.tanaimilgram.com/ Wild Ugly Beautiful Retreat in Mexico (with Rinsha Ballani) — happening this April! The Unapologetic Program   Resources mentioned in this episode: A Return to Love by Marianne Williamson Landmark Education  

It's not every day you hear about someone getting her start in the world of sexual education by opening up a sex shop with her mom — but if there's one word to describe our guests today, it's definitely “unconventional.”    Amy Baldwin is a Certified Sexuality Educator with a degree in Psychology and a minor in Human Sexuality from San Francisco State University. In 2008, she opened Pure Pleasure Shop with her mother in Santa Cruz, CA.    Their first employee was April Lampert… and the rest, as they say, is history.    April showed up with a little less experience but a whole lot of fun and curiosity, and today she is the Vice President of Hot Octopuss, an innovative pleasure product company, and has dedicated her working life to educating people on a global scale about sexual pleasure, health and wellness, and pleasure products.   Together, Amy and April started the Shameless Sex podcast. Their goal is to engage in unabashed real talk about sexuality with a playful twist, so that people everywhere can be inspired to experience radical self-love, sexual empowerment, and shame-free intimacy.   Today we're diving in with Amy and April to talk about how to start using sex toys, what to do if you're curious (and maybe a little squeamish) about trying anal, and how to keep sex hot and alive in long term relationships.    You're going to love this no-holds-barred conversation with two hilarious women who know how to put pleasure first.    What you'll learn in this episode: Where to start if you've never used sex toys before How to safely explore anal to increase pleasure How Amy and April got into business together Whether porn can be a positive resource in your own sex life Amy and April's tips for keeping the sizzle in long-term relationships   Explore our website: https://www.desireonfire.com/ Come and join our FB community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/DesireOnFire/ And connect with us on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/desireonfire/   Connect with Aimee: Check out my instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/aimeebatuski/   Connect with Ellie: Check out my instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/elliemontgomerie   Connect with Amy + April:   April on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/aprillampert Amy on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/amyshamelesssex Pure Pleasure website: https://www.purepleasureshop.com/ Listen to the Shameless Sex podcast   Products + Resources mentioned in this episode: Uberlube Hot Octopuss sex toys Esther Perel Dipsea erotica Bree Mills at Adult Time for educational porn Tristan Taormino and Sex Out Loud Radio

Today we're giving you another peek behind-the-scenes, into a call with some of our inner circle clients.    And there must be something in the air, because this call definitely seemed to have a theme: navigating unknowns, holding tension in the in-between, and nurturing connection in our existing relationships as we're changing.    Here's something that not a lot of people talk about in transformational work: it can be lonely at times.    Yes, there are the highs. Moments of total magic and healing. Reaching new levels of love for yourself and others. Really feeling your own power. It's amazing!    And also? Sometimes that's weird for other people. They don't know how to handle it. You might  worry about losing friendships, or dynamics changing. You might feel pulled to try and mend broken relationships, or to let go of those that aren't in alignment. You might realize that your old friendships can't quite hold the depth we crave — and it can be hard to know how to find that solid sisterhood you really desire.   In this call, we're going deep on what it means to surrender to this messy middle, and to trust that something greater is guiding you through.    What we cover in this episode:   What to do with the fear of losing control How to stay intimate + vulnerable when we're going through intense transformation   How sisterhood can help ALL your relationships How to listen to your body so you know when it's time for a change What it means to ‘intentionally cause intimacy' when you're longing for more connection in your life Explore our website: https://www.desireonfire.com/ Come and join our FB community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/DesireOnFire/ And connect with us on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/desireonfire/   Connect with Aimee: Check out my instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/aimeebatuski/   Connect with Ellie: Check out my instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/elliemontgomerie  

If you've ever felt yourself buying into the cultural idea that sexiness, play, and pleasure fizzle after a certain age … then stop everything you're doing and listen to this episode!    Today we're thrilled to have Tantra expert and international bestselling author Laurie Handlers on the show, and what an incredible conversation this is.    Laurie is full of fire — you can feel it. It's in her body, her voice, her stories. She oozes confidence and total Pleasure Queen energy.    Also? She knows her shit. She's been doing this work since 1978 and is one of the world's foremost authorities on Tantra and transformation through pleasure.   In this interview, we cover everything from BDSM and what makes a relationship sizzle to her first marriage at 75 and embracing lifelong sexiness.    You'll see why she's helped tens of thousands of couples and singles all over the world to experience the healing principles of Tantra and to discover why our higher purpose and creative life force are so intimately linked to our sexuality.     Trust us, Laurie Handlers is #goals and you're gonna love her.    What you'll learn in this episode:   Why Laurie decided to get married at 75 (and their unique love story!) How women 50 years and beyond can stay sexy, curious + adventurous  What Laurie saw was missing from Tantra that prompted her to write her bestselling book The importance of masculine and feminine energy to create whole-life integrity What made Laurie change her mind about BDSM The unusual definition of love Laurie and Michael hold — and why it works Explore our website: https://www.desireonfire.com/ Come and join our FB community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/DesireOnFire/ And connect with us on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/desireonfire/   Connect with Aimee: Check out my instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/aimeebatuski/   Connect with Ellie: Check out my instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/elliemontgomerie   Connect with Laurie:  Website: https://lauriehandlers.com/ Instagram: www.instagram.com/laurie.handlers Sex & Happiness book Extraordinary Lovers retreat   Resources mentioned in this episode: Existential Kink, by Carolyn Elliott Rinsha episode on loving your body as it is International School of Temple Arts (ISTA) Miss Jaiya + Erotic Blueprint Om Rupani, Tantra + BDSM teacher Orgasmic Meditation Guy Shahar + Tantra Speed Date Landmark Education Allison Armstrong

We're doing something we've never done on the podcast before!    We know that real sisterhood is medicine. The vulnerability, the intimacy, the no-BS reflections — this is the stuff that heals, expands, and empowers like nothing else.    The Inner Circle is a paid membership for women that have been working with us for years: graduates of our Pleasure Mastery Program, retreats, or leadership programs. And each month, we do a real-time Q&A with the biggest things they're facing.     And we realized something: there is SO much gold inside these calls.    These are women who are living from their desires, who are exploring all kinds of new ways of thinking, acting, and being in the world.    They are IN IT, doing this work with such heart. And witnessing that work in real time can be an incredible teacher for all of us.     We love our Inner Circle calls so much that we wanted to try sharing them with everyone! So with the permission of the Inner Circle members, we're trying something new.    We recorded this call and are offering it to you. It's basically a free mini-masterclass, filled with the wisdom that only sisterhood can bring. We hope you enjoy it! Inside the episode you'll learn:   How to handle uncomfortable conversations with people who disagree with you (especially when you crave their approval) Practical tools that can help you let go of spiritual bypassing and work with your rage so that it actually comes in service of your highest good Noticing the difference between and open-hearted boundary and a wall What you can do if you're experiencing intense PMS symptoms   Explore our website: https://www.desireonfire.com/ Come and join our FB community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/DesireOnFire/ And connect with us on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/desireonfire/   Connect with Aimee: Check out my instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/aimeebatuski/   Connect with Ellie: Check out my instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/elliemontgomerie   Spiritual Bypassing book Robert Augustus Master Woman Code by Alisa Vitti Code Red by Lisa Lister

Today we're diving deep with the sexy, playful Shaft Uddin!    At Desire on Fire, we always say that healing one area of your life never stays in that one area.    That's why when you work on expanding your desire, pleasure, and connection in your sex life, you find yourself with more of all of that in the rest of your life, too.    You begin to see powerful shifts in your romantic relationships, your work, your finances, and your sense of self-love. It's all connected!    For Shaft Uddin, that's the ultimate beauty of tantra and why it's such an effective tool for expansion, healing, and growth. The profound intimacy of tantra brings peace — and that has a  miraculous, magical effect in all areas of our lives.    Shaft was SO generous with his story and with his healing journey. We know you're going to love his insights on sex, intimacy, trauma, healing old family wounds, and the immense power of forgiveness.    A self-described “juicy geek,” Shaft is a yoni whisperer, tantric practitioner, somatic trauma therapist, and sacred sexuality coach.    In this episode, you'll learn: Shaft's amazing personal story of trauma, forgiveness, and freedom What tantra is and why it's so powerful What happens in a tantric massage session Prompts for how to genuinely connect with difficult people in your life   Explore our website: https://www.desireonfire.com/ Come and join our FB community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/DesireOnFire/ And connect with us on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/desireonfire/   Connect with Aimee: Check out my instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/aimeebatuski/   Connect with Ellie: Check out my instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/elliemontgomerie   Connect with Shaft: Website: http://www.sacredsexualawakening.com/ Insta: https://www.instagram.com/shaftuddin/ YouTube: youtube.com/user/shaftuddin Resources/people mentioned in this episode: Gina Swire: https://www.ginaswire.com/ Podcast episode with Gina  

We're back after a 2-month hiatus from podcasting, blogging, promo-ing, and social media … and we're feeling GREAT.    A lot has changed in those two months. Like a LOT.   For one, we (Aimee, Ellie, Rob, and Bear) left LA and are now all living together in Austin, TX. And that's just the tip of the massive change iceberg.    Throughout the last several months, we've been slowly passing through what feels like a major portal.    It's been an initiation into what it really means to tune into and trust desire, especially when you don't have instant clarity about what's next and the place you are looks pretty damn perfect on paper.    Most of all, it's been an incredible growth opportunity and a chance to really experience the profound difference between acting out of urgency and waiting patiently for the Fuck Yes!    Today, we're diving into the intense portal that the last year has been for all of us — what we wrestled with, what we waited for, how we grew, and what we've learned.    Listen to find out: What made us decide to relocate  How it's been working to have Aimee living with Ellie + fam  Why Aimee was a “yes” to Austin — and things that have surprised her What it means to wait patiently for the clarity of your desire in a world that's obsessed with instant gratification How to trust the greater plan of the Universe, even when your life looks nothing like you wish it did Explore our website: https://www.desireonfire.com/ Come and join our FB community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/DesireOnFire/ And connect with us on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/desireonfire/   Connect with Aimee: Check out my instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/aimeebatuski/   Connect with Ellie: Check out my instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/elliemontgomerie

If you're an ambitious woman like our guest today (and like both Aimee and Ellie), you might know how easy it is to confuse your work with your worth.  It's so easy to get caught up in hustle and the masculine energy of go go go that we forget ourselves — our bodies, our desires, our wellbeing. The feminine path isn't just about appreciating our amazing bodies (though that's definitely part of it) and reconnecting with our desire and pleasure (also a huge component).  It's about how surrender is the current we ride into all the very best things in our lives: abundance, real love, pleasure, purpose.  We don't have to work and push to make things happen. The magic + medicine of the feminine is that she already knows how to allow every good thing. We just have to listen and trust her.  Today's guest knows the exquisite ecstasy of surrender, in part because she's already experienced the other side — the hard-driving, the achieving, the burnout, and the numb sense that no matter how much you work, you're never really going to “get there.”  And she knows what happens when you let it all go and choose the path of rest, healing, listening, and deep trust.  Mel Wells is a bestselling author and an embodied leadership and intimacy coach for queens. She's trained in holistic sex, love and relationships, eating psychology, and holistic health — and she sees now how reconnecting with the Divine feminine is what holds all of this together.  She's also a blissed-out partner and brand new momma, and that journey is bringing home with even more tenderness the lessons of surrender. You're going to LOVE this wise, open conversation with someone who has journeyed far and found her way back to herself with such grace.   In this episode, you'll learn: The major shift Mel made in her business  How she started to feel the call to move into the space of feminine work Why women have to address the “when/then” mindset if they want to be happy Her amazing love story with her current partner Her journey of pregnancy and the miraculous birth of her baby Sky Explore our website: https://www.desireonfire.com/ Come and join our FB community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/DesireOnFire/ And connect with us on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/desireonfire/   Connect with Aimee: Check out my instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/aimeebatuski/   Connect with Ellie: Check out my instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/elliemontgomerie   Connect with Mel: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/iammelwells/ https://www.instagram.com/thegoddesscollective_/ https://www.instagram.com/thequeendomcouncil/ Website: https://melwells.com/ Related episodes: Doing Less, Living Cyclically + Experiencing More “Yum” With Kate Northrup

Have you ever wished there was a 5 Love Languages … but for sex?    You know: a way to know what nourishes you in the bedroom, what turns you on (and off), what turns your partner on (and off), what would lead to the most fulfilling, most satisfying sex you could possibly have.    That's what the Erotic Blueprints deliever!    When you know your erotic blueprint, you finally have a language to understand and communicate how you relate to eroticism. You'll be better able to communicate what you need. And you'll be able to let go of judgments around your own desires and those of your partner.    So knowing your erotic blueprint isn't just sex-life-changing — although it's definitely that! — it can actually be a vehicle for deep connection and healing with your partner. There's a reason this framework has become such a cornerstone of the work we do at Desire on Fire.   Today, Aimee is sharing an interview she did with Danielle Hatton on Danielle's podcast. Together, they're doing a deep-dive into the 5 Erotic Blueprints — what they look like, what they need, what their superpowers and shadows are, and how you can use these guides as a way to expand fully into who you are as a sexual being.    In this episode, you'll learn:   What the Erotic Blueprints are, how they work, and how they can transform your sex life How to work with them The biggest misconception about male and female sexuality What both Aimee and Danielle share in common when it comes to their blueprints How to talk to your partner about this work What you can do if you and your partner have very different blueprints (no, you don't have to break up!)   Explore our website: https://www.desireonfire.com/ Come and join our FB community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/DesireOnFire/ And connect with us on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/desireonfire/   Connect with Aimee: Check out my instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/aimeebatuski/

Are you hiding your true personal style “in the closet”? What are you denying your true style desires — because you feel like they're too much, or not enough, or that your body isn't “right” enough yet to wear what you want to wear?    Celebrity stylist Elissa Williams (and stylist for Aimee and Ellie at the Desire on Fire Experience!) believes fashion is way more than just clothes and trends.    It's a tool for self-expression, empowerment, and manifestation in our lives. It's a way we communicate our real selves, and a physical representation of our self-love.    And at its root, leaning into our natural style can be a deeply sacred practice, because our clothes are a physical reminder of all we're becoming.    When we wear what we love and what makes us feel alive, free, sexy, abundant, and playful — regardless of the price tag — we're actually calling in more of the life we desire.    Elissa is a celebrity stylist and investor, speaker, founder of the Embodied Style Method and The School of Heart-Centered Styling.    She's a style alchemist, mixing fashion, self-expression, and a radical call to be the most evolved version of ourselves by creating a wardrobe that feels good and magnetizes abundance.   In this energetic, positive workshop, Elissa walks us through the keys to powerfully embodying your personal style.   She is FULL of bright wisdom, intelligent insight, and a totally magical approach to the simple, powerful act of dressing yourself each day.    In this episode, you'll learn: Elissa's background and how she got where she is today Her surprising take on what “next level” really means Elissa's 5 steps to embody your personal style Why you should never hold back on getting different clothes when your body changes What to do when you're a Chanel girl who's currently living on a Target budget How she's found joy, abundance, and sexiness as a new mom Listen, follow, and review our podcast here!    Explore our website: https://www.desireonfire.com/ Come and join our FB community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/DesireOnFire/ And connect with us on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/desireonfire/   Connect with Aimee: Check out my instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/aimeebatuski/   Connect with Ellie: Check out my instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/elliemontgomerie   Connect with Elissa: Website: https://www.theschoolofheartcenteredstyling.com/ Insta: https://www.instagram.com/elissamwilliams Free guide: https://yourvirtualclosetconcierge.members-only.online/manifest

We know many of you have been following Aimee's unconventional adventures with Alex over the last three months.    From the Tantra retreat that was their first date to the 10 days in Australia that was their second, nothing about Aimee and Alex's experience has been ordinary.    Their chemistry was palpable right off the bat, their connection felt real, and they definitely shared important things in common: personal growth work, embodied practices, coaching, and embracing a spirit of adventure and curiosity together.    In this episode, Ellie joins Aimee as she shares the rollercoaster details of the last few weeks and the lessons learned as she and Alex decided to close this chapter of their relationship together.    Ellie witnessed it all play out in real time, as they were all together in Portugal for the final days — and her perspective as a loving friend and wise sister makes the conversation that much more real and honest.     What you'll learn in this episode:   What led up to Aimee + Alex deciding to meet up in Portugal What felt amazing, what felt difficult — and when Aimee really knew it was over The moment when true sisterhood came into play to help Aimee face reality (why we need sisters, y'all!) Why Alex has been Ellie's favorite relationship for Aimee (so far), even though she knew the relationshift was the right thing What it means to “choose yourself” in the midst of emotional entanglement and difficult choices What Aimee is taking away from this experience, and what she's up to now   Join us (and 300+ women!) in person or virtually at the Desire on Fire Experience event, October 29-30, in Southern California! www.desireonfirelive.com Code: DESIRE for $500 off the regular ticket price!   Explore our website: https://www.desireonfire.com/ Come and join our FB community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/DesireOnFire/ And connect with us on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/desireonfire/   Connect with Aimee: Check out my instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/aimeebatuski/   Connect with Ellie: Check out my instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/elliemontgomerie   Related episodes: Tantra Retreat

In our culture, we tend to think of “success” as linear, and we measure it by “more” — more money, more stuff, bigger numbers, more followers, more work.    But when we look at the natural world, we don't see linearity anywhere. It's ALL seasons and cycles. Rest + work. Growing + birthing. Sowing + harvest.    So … why do we insist on running our lives by a measurement that is SO out of sync with our bodies, our souls, and literally all of nature and reality?    And why are we surprised that we're stressed, burned out, and that our creative, sensual, and erotic energy is dried up?   If you've done all the mindset work — the affirmations, the mantras, the positive thinking — and you still find yourself encountering the same struggles and roadblocks when it comes to work, money, and rest — then this episode is for you.    Today's episode with Kate Northrup is going to challenge and upend EVERYTHING you thought you knew about success, satisfaction, and how to get what you truly desire.    This is the perfect time to have Kate on the show, because we are in a season of huge change here at Desire on Fire, where we've been confronted again and again with what we thought “should” be happening vs. what is actually happening and what wants to be moving through us.     What happens when we let go of control, drop deeply into our bodies, allow the flow, honor the cyclical nature of reality, and actually … do less?     Oh how you're going to LOVE this refreshing, vital conversation with the incomparable Kate Northrup!   In this episode, you'll learn: What the patriarchal model is missing, and why it's time to let it go Why you might want to reconsider goal-setting The lie we believe about finances and fulfillment — and what we need to embrace instead How Kate approaches marriage, sex, and eroticism as a highly amibitious, successful woman (this one might surprise you) Why there is no direct relationship between our numbers (money, followers, clients, etc.) and our impact — and how this can free us up (this insight was huge for us)   Join us (and 300+ women!) in person or virtually at the Desire on Fire Experience event, October 29-30, in Southern California! www.desireonfirelive.com Code: DESIRE for $500 off the regular ticket price!   Explore our website: https://www.desireonfire.com/ Come and join our FB community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/DesireOnFire/ And connect with us on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/desireonfire/   Connect with Aimee: Check out my instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/aimeebatuski/   Connect with Ellie: Check out my instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/elliemontgomerie   Connect with Kate:  Insta: @katenorthrup Website: theorigincompany.co  Resource: The Business Pressure Relief Kit  Book: Do Less

If you met Danielle, you'd see an absolutely gorgeous, vivacious woman. And if you spent any amount of time talking to her, you'd immediately notice her depth, her curiosity, and her natural healing energy.    But like so many of us, she's spent a lifetime dealing with the shadow of body insecurity — picking up on societal messages, mirroring her own mother's struggles, being steeped in beauty and dance culture.    It wasn't until she started diving into her work with Desire on Fire that she began to look more closely at where these judgments were coming from — and what they were costing her. As she's moved deeper into living a desire-led life, she's found a way to “unhook” from these patterns, and that has given her an immense amount of freedom in her life.    Here at Desire on Fire, we talk quite a bit about “shadow work” — but that can sometimes feel vague to someone who's new to it.    So today in this vulnerable conversation between Ellie and Danielle, you'll get a concrete sense of what it means to face your shadows, to look at them tenderly, and then to release the hold they have on your life.    We hope you find this conversation to be as encouraging and inspiring as we did!    Danielle is currently a coach and breathwork teacher who works with clients virtually all over the world, and if you're lucky enough to live in London, you can now work with her in person.    In this episode, you will learn: How Danielle and Ellie first met What shaped Danielle's ideas of her own beauty and body when she was growing up The tipping point for her — and how the work with Desire on Fire has offered her new tools to deal with an old shadow What it was like for her to voice her desires for the first time at the Desire on Fire Experience What changes when you simply refuse to participate in old patterns (even when everyone around you still is) Join us (and 300+ women!) in person or virtually at the Desire on Fire Experience event, October 29-30, in Southern California! www.desireonfirelive.com Code: DESIRE for $500 off the regular ticket price!   Explore our website: https://www.desireonfire.com/ Come and join our FB community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/DesireOnFire/ And connect with us on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/desireonfire/   Connect with Aimee: Check out my instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/aimeebatuski/   Connect with Ellie: Check out my instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/elliemontgomerie   Connect with Danielle: Website: https://www.daniellehatton.com/ Insta: https://www.instagram.com/daniellehattonn/

One of the foundational values of the work we do, and the work we love guiding other women through, is radical honesty.    And both of us have realized recently that we need to reconnect with this value when it comes to our struggles trying to “make it happen” with the upcoming Desire on Fire Live event at the end of October.    Because here's the deal: it's been a hard, challenging, stressful year of planning. And we weren't expecting that. In fact, we were expecting it to be smooth sailing. And we hung on for a long, long time to that expectation.    So when we seemed to encounter nothing but roadblocks — messaging snafus, canceled venues, date change, slow signups — we were really starting to feel stressed and discouraged.   We got so caught up in what wasn't working that we lost sight of everything that was there for us, everything we had to be truly grateful for, and in some ways even the heart of the Experience itself. We were talking about this year as if it were playing piggyback on last year — when in fact, 2022 is a dramatically different year in a thousand different ways, and we weren't honoring that reality as much as we could have.    So this episode is ALL about clearing the mess. We want to tell you what we've been learning (and re-learning) about this work.    That means sharing what's real. Getting back to our foundation of gratitude, abundance, and flow. Reconnecting with the powerful, fierce heart of the Desire on Fire Experience. And extending a heartfelt invitation to all of you to come just as you are, whatever that looks like this year.    What you'll learn in this episode:  The rollercoaster of this year compared to last year Where we lost sight — and how we regained it Why Fall 2022 has a completely different feel (and very different needs) How this journey has called us to recommit to service What the DOFE really stands for Join us (and 300+ women!) in person or virtually at the Desire on Fire Experience event, October 29-30, in Southern California! www.desireonfirelive.com Code: DESIRE for $500 off the regular ticket price! Explore our website: https://www.desireonfire.com/ Come and join our FB community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/DesireOnFire/ And connect with us on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/desireonfire/   Connect with Aimee: Check out my instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/aimeebatuski/   Connect with Ellie: Check out my instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/elliemontgomerie   Related episodes:Ellie Shares Her Amazing Birth Story! Excavating Your Shadows with Adrian Ellison

In her early 20s, Elena Rossi spent 7 years dealing with chronic vaginal pain, yeast infections, and UTIs. She saw 22 doctors, tried all kinds of meds and creams — and nothing was working. The pain was actually getting worse.   In all her visits to doctors of all kinds, all the questions were about her body. No one ever asked her about her relationship, or the quality of sex with her then-boyfriend, or if she felt safe or loved. No one ever asked, How is your heart?    It took her p*ssy literally clamping down and excruciating pain to get her to stop and listen to what her body had been trying to tell her (louder and louder) for years. She was in an abusive relationship, and her entire being was saying: no, stop, get out, run.    Her body held a wisdom that at the time she couldn't recognize or interpret. She spent the next 5 years on a journey of physical, mental, and emotional healing that eventually led to her sexual healing. And in the process, she discovered her life's work.    Elena is a female libido specialist, the author of 2 books, a sex toy designer, and the founder of The Yoni Empire. A sensual connoisseur at heart, she helps women explore the nourishing power of sexuality infused with purpose and meaning.   Today's conversation is raw and radically honest — the kind of no-BS truth-telling that women need in order for real healing to take place. Elena gets at the heart of what we're really craving, why porn makes a terrible sex-ed teacher, and what we need to admit to ourselves before we can truly find pleasure and sexual freedom.    What you'll learn in this episode:  Elena's personal journey from suffering to healing Aimee's recent experience of listening to her body As women, what it means to get clear on our intentions for sex  What's really going on when people say they've ‘lost' their libido What's underneath the things we say we want The thing we don't want to be honest about when it comes to sex   Join us (and 300+ women!) in person or virtually at the Desire on Fire Experience event, October 29-30, in Southern California! www.desireonfirelive.com Code: DESIRE for $500 off the regular ticket price!   Explore our website: https://www.desireonfire.com/ Come and join our FB community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/DesireOnFire/ And connect with us on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/desireonfire/   Connect with Aimee: Check out my instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/aimeebatuski/   Connect with Ellie: Check out my instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/elliemontgomerie   Connect with Elena: Insta: https://www.instagram.com/the_yoni_empire Website: https://theyoniempire.com/   People/resources mentioned: Steve Haines, Trauma Release Exercises: his book

If you're a Projector (or you have Projectors in your life and you want to understand/support them better) — then today's episode is for you!    In this conversation, Ellie connects with Christen Hillmer, a coach and healer who is part of Desire on Fire community. She's a recent graduate of our Apprenticeship Program— and she also happens to be a Projector.    Here's why this conversation is so important right now: Projectors only make up about 20% of the population, but are essential in facilitating healing, guidance, and wisdom for the planet.    And if you're a Projector, you may have felt it: living fully by your design can be tricky, because we live in a culture that is really set up for Generators.    We get all kinds of rewards and affirmation for action and hustle and hard work. And things like extra naps, light workloads, quiet, and ease can be seen as not productive and actually kind of … well, lazy.     Today, Ellie and Christen dive into what it means to be a Projector and an entrepreneur — and how to build a life that actually allows you to thrive … exactly the way you were meant to.    What you'll learn in this episode:  What it was like for Ellie and Christen to discover they were Projectors The telltale signs that a Projector is operating from her aligned energy source — or not How to find ways to be seen that feel authentic, free, and empowering (vs. depleting and stuck in comparison) — whether you're on or off social media The biggest challenges Projectors face The 4 main areas of life where a Projector needs true sovereignty (vs. neediness) in order to be at peace What does it really mean to “wait for the invitation” and how can you become more attuned to invites coming in? Join us for The Ignited Woman Masterclass series, happening through the entire month of September! Sign up for free here: www.desireonfire.com/ignitedwoman   Join us (and 300+ women!) in person or virtually at the Desire on Fire Experience event, October 29-30, in Southern California! www.desireonfirelive.com Code: DESIRE for $500 off the regular ticket price! Explore our website: https://www.desireonfire.com/ Come and join our FB community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/DesireOnFire/ And connect with us on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/desireonfire/   Connect with Aimee: Check out my instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/aimeebatuski/   Connect with Ellie: Check out my instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/elliemontgomerie   Connect with Christen:  Insta: https://www.instagram.com/christen.hillmer/ Resources/people mentioned: Jenna Zoe at www.Myhumandesign.com Travis Day 

Is it possible to truly, genuinely, passionately love your body … AND also want to change it?    Does desiring change mean you don't fully accept your body?    In a cultural movement that's all about cultivating self-love, it can actually feel weird and shameful to want to change our bodies — whether it's by losing weight, gaining weight, working out, cosmetic procedures, or plastic surgery.    The result can be a kind of forced silence around the deep longings we might have, and a resistance to facing the shame we feel. So we might recognize we're losing out on certain aspects of abundant, healthy, sexy living in our current bodies … but feel totally unclear on how to choose a new way of showing up.     So where does “positivity” cross over into “bypassing”? How can that be disempowering for women? And how can we practice continually tuning into and trusting our real desires when it comes to the choices we make around our bodies, regardless of where the cultural tides move?    That's what we're talking about today, and wow — this is a nuanced, juicy episode!    We've got the incredible and much-beloved Rinsha Ballani back on the show. Rinsha has been an integral part of Desire on Fire since the beginning, and she's no stranger to controversial stances — and this conversation is no exception.    Bold, contrarian, and beautifully vulnerable, this is an episode for anyone who is walking the long journey to true body-self-love and embracing your worthiness, your sexiness, and your desires for your body, regardless of what shape or size it is. What you'll learn in this episode:    Why Aimee decided to hire a personal trainer in Bali The judgments we hold about others' choices — and what those judgments are trying to show us Rinsha's movement to genuinely love every inch of her body What the body positivity movement has brought us — and what it's missing Working through our experiences of shame (instead of bypassing) to get to the deeper desire The plastic surgery Aimee really wants Learning to identify your “come from” — and why it makes all the difference  Join us for The Ignited Woman Masterclass series, happening through the entire month of September! Sign up for free here: www.desireonfire.com/ignitedwoman   Join us (and 300+ women!) in person at the Desire on Fire Experience event, October 29-30, in Southern California! www.desireonfirelive.com Code: DESIRE for $500 off the regular ticket price! Explore our website: https://www.desireonfire.com/ Come and join our FB community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/DesireOnFire/ And connect with us on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/desireonfire/   Connect with Aimee: Check out my instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/aimeebatuski/   Connect with Ellie: Check out my instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/elliemontgomerie   Connect with Rinsha: Insta: https://www.instagram.com/rinshaballani   Click here to opt-in to Rinsha's email list to be the first to know when she launches her next offerings! https://view.flodesk.com/pages/6320cbd19f7462fb241d4f98 People/resources mentioned in this episode: Jordan Peterson Mikhaila Peterson Layla Martin Kyle Mercer website: https://www.lifeataltitude.com/ Kyle's Instagram: www.instagram.com/inquirymethod Related episodes:  Kyle Mercer: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/aimee-and-ellie-get-coached-by-master-coach-and/id1511088586?i=1000557462717 Rinsha Ballani:  https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/have-the-best-sex-of-your-life-with-rinsha-ballani/id1511088586?i=1000532368599 https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/a-deep-dive-with-rinsha-ballani-part-1/id1511088586?i=1000540608730 https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/a-deep-dive-with-rinsha-ballani-part-2-blowing-shit/id1511088586?i=1000541332533

In early 2020, Jamie King was a rising star — an overnight sensation in the biz marketing world, landing 6-figure months like it was nothing and living in the limelight.    She was also falling apart — stretched way too thin, trying to be everything to everyone, traveling all the time, doing constant hustle + grind when what she really desired was to be home with her kids.    So for her, the lockdown was a godsend. It forced her to slow down. Take stock. Get back to the basics. Ask herself what she really wanted.    And it turned out, she wanted something very different from what she'd wanted before.    She had to get deeply in touch with everything she'd been bypassing. And she had to attend more than one ego-funeral that year. But it saved her, and it saved her marriage, and it gave her a whole new perspective on her mission and allowed her to shift her biz to be in alignment with her soul desires.    Today, with her collection of “Slay” programs, Jamie teaches creatives, coaches, course creators, and online “Slay-dy Bosses” the Mindset, Spiritual, and Strategic steps for building a highly engaged tribe, and scaling their businesses to multiple 6 Figures. And she does it on her terms.   You'll notice from the first minute of this interview: Jaimie does NOT hide from what's real. It's all out there — the struggles, “failures” (listen in for her fabulous, empowering perspective on this), revelations, brags, and evolutions. Everything she's accomplished is precisely because she is 100% committed to telling, living, and embodying her truth.    If you're feeling the pull of a big transition or a shift in your identity — and especially if it's kind of freaking you out — you are going to LOVE the wisdom Jamie brings in today's conversation.    What you'll learn in today's episode:    What to do when your desires shift How to frame your experiences with bad investments, heartbreak, wrong choices, and “failures” The power of choosing to find the gift — and why it's not the same as “toxic positivity”  Discerning the difference between consumption and true desire Embracing the pull to embrace a new identity    Join us for The Ignited Woman Masterclass series, happening through the entire month of September! Sign up for free here: www.desireonfire.com/ignitedwoman   Join us (and 300+ women!) in person at the Desire on Fire Experience event, October 29-30, in Southern California! www.desireonfirelive.com Code: DESIRE for $500 off the regular ticket price! Explore our website: https://www.desireonfire.com/ Come and join our FB community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/DesireOnFire/ And connect with us on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/desireonfire/   Connect with Aimee: Check out my instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/aimeebatuski/   Connect with Ellie: Check out my instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/elliemontgomerie   Connect with Jamie:  Insta: https://www.instagram.com/jamiejoslinking/  Website: https://www.theslaycoach.com/

Waiting for Bear's arrival involved months of preparation for Ellie and her husband Rob. They had a plan for a natural birth at home, including hiring a midwife and doula, taking special birthing classes, and creating a birthing plan (complete with playlists!).    Then … the birth happened. And Bear, it seems, definitely had some different ideas about how and when he wanted to arrive in this world.   We talk a lot about surrender in this work — that sacred way we know we can trust what the Universe is up to and can trust our intuition and desire along the way.    And sometimes surrender feels easy and amazing … and at other times, it is a deep spiritual (and literal!) labor.    It requires heroic levels of inward listening. It asks you again and again to return to the primal ground of your being.    Today, Ellie walks us through her entire birth odyssey, everything she was feeling, experiencing, and struggling with, all the support she received along the way, and what this journey has taught her that she never expected. This is an incredibly vulnerable, tender, and moving conversation!    What you'll learn in this episode:    Ellie's birth plan, and why she decided on a home birth What helped her the most in early labor The experience of a harrowing 30+-hour labor (that definitely did not go according to plan!) How she made it through the hardest parts What she wished she would have known going into labor What she learned — and what she'd like her next birth to be like   Explore our website: https://www.desireonfire.com/ Come and join our FB community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/DesireOnFire/ And connect with us on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/desireonfire/   Connect with Aimee: Check out my instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/aimeebatuski/   Connect with Ellie: Check out my instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/elliemontgomerie   Spiritual Midwifery, by Ina May Gaskin Tranquility by Hehe website and Insta   Rights Over Your Birth Package from Sacred Birth Doula

Our culture often tells one story about how relationships are “supposed” to look. It can be hard for us to feel into possibilities beyond the traditional cultural understanding of monogamy.    Non-monogamy is often portrayed as selfish, or as one partner caving to the wishes of the other — like the trope of the woman who begrudgingly agrees to a threesome so her man won't leave her.    So it's understandable that many couples reject exploring outside-the-box desires, because it can feel uncomfortable and even threatening.    Our guest today has come to challenge these inaccurate assumptions, and to shine an honest light on the realities, challenges, and beautiful expansions that ethical non-monogamy can bring to loving, committed relationships.    Jessica Esfandiary and her husband Pasha have been married for 8 years and together for almost a decade. Most of those years have been spent cultivating a safe and reverent open/polyamorous partnership — including inviting Jessica's current female partner into their relationship.   As a coach and host of the Open Late podcast, today Jessica is a curator of brave spaces for people to own their power and awaken to their most expansive selves. She helps couples create designer relationships with truth, vulnerability, intimacy, and play.   If you've ever been non-monagamy-curious, have taboo desires you've never expressed, or are ready to have your assumptions about non-monogamy confronted — then you're gonna love today's episode!    What you'll learn in this episode:    Jessica and Pasha's journey to an open relationship and how they make it work The many variations of non-monogamy — and why it doesn't always have to be about sex The power of allowing your relationship(s) to change Why “jealousy” can be a lazy reason to not explore non-monogamy — and why it pays to dig deeper The honest challenges Jessica and Pasha have faced and how they dealt with them How to start the conversation with your partner if you're interested in exploring new ways of relating  Explore our website: https://www.desireonfire.com/ Come and join our FB community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/DesireOnFire/ And connect with us on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/desireonfire/   Connect with Aimee: Check out my instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/aimeebatuski/   Connect with Ellie: Check out my instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/elliemontgomerie   Connect with jessica:  Insta: https://www.instagram.com/journey.with.jessica Web: https://www.jessicaesfandiary.com/ Take the Relationship Style Quiz: https://www.jessicaesfandiary.com/whats-your-relationship-style   Books mentioned: Pussy: a Reclamation Untrue Sex at Dawn

Almost no experience is so universal and so painful to women as shame about our bodies.    And for millions of women, the shame about our vulvas is one of the deepest wounds we feel.    Many of us have a moment where we felt that something was wrong or broken about our pussies:    we didn't look like the images we saw porn we internalized disparaging comments from boys or men around us growing up we felt pressured to alter the appearance of our pussies (shaving, waxing, obsessive cleaning, even surgery) to conform to what we think they “should” look like we assumed that the way our bodies looked was weird and bad compared to other women out there   But as our guest today says: When you hate a part of yourself, it goes numb. It goes silent.    And when it comes to our pussies, we miss out on the most powerful wisdom and guidance system we have. We miss out on orgasmic pleasure. We miss out on real connection with partners and sharing our full self with the world.    Today's guest, Kara Baruzzini, shares her extraordinary journey from hiding, silencing, and hating her pussy to being one of the foremost experts and celebrators of passionate pussy love. Today, she supports women to reclaim their pleasure and sensual nature, heal from sexual shame, expand their orgasmic potential, live more pleasure-filled lives, and embody their feminine energy.    If you've ever struggled with pussy shame, you are going to LOVE the healing and liberating truth in today's episode! Explore our website: https://www.desireonfire.com/ Come and join our FB community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/DesireOnFire/ And connect with us on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/desireonfire/   Connect with Aimee: Check out my instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/aimeebatuski/   Connect with Ellie: Check out my instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/elliemontgomerie   Connect with Kara: Insta: https://www.instagram.com/kara.makingwaves Website: https://www.papayalovecoach.com/   Learn more about pussy love:  https://www.instagram.com/vulvacasting/ https://www.instagram.com/The.vulva.gallery Pussy: A Reclamation  The Pussy Talks documentary

To hear Maci Shelden talk today, you might never imagine where she was in her early 20s: playing the part, hanging out and drinking with high school and college friends, always bending over backwards for everyone, trying so hard to get it right and be a good girl.    Underneath it all, she felt lonely and disconnected, like she was always pretending or putting on a show. She knew there had to be more to life than just going through the motions.    And she was right!    Maci has been with us at Desire on Fire since the very beginning. She was one of the participants on our very first online offering in 2018 (and has participated in many since), and is currently the student coordinator for our Inner Circle membership.    In our very first in-person Desire on Fire retreat, she had a massive breakthrough that shattered her perception of herself. She also knew it would affect her new dating relationship with Tanner.    She realized she was at a crossroads: Would she keep pretending like she always had, keep being the good girl she thought everyone expected? Or would she dare to be fully honest and say the thing that could end the relationship?    In today's episode, Maci and Tanner give the vulnerable-sweet-sexy details about what this work has done for them, what it has allowed them to say yes to, and how a desire-led life shapes every aspect of a relationship.    What you'll learn in this episode: What Maci finally admitted (out loud!) about herself at a DoF retreat The moment that shifted Maci and Tanner's relationship  Sexy details of their adventures together The challenges along the way — and how they use this work daily to stay honest & connected How this level of honesty affects every aspect of their relationship   Join us (and 300+ women!) in person at the Desire on Fire Experience event, October 29-30, in Southern California! www.desireonfirelive.com Code: DESIRE for $500 off the regular ticket price!   Explore our website: https://www.desireonfire.com/ Come and join our FB community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/DesireOnFire/ And connect with us on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/desireonfire/   Connect with Aimee: Check out my instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/aimeebatuski/   Connect with Ellie: Check out my instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/elliemontgomerie   Connect with Maci: https://www.instagram.com/_itsmaci   Connect with Tanner at Amazing Grace in Breckenridge

If you're ready to seriously up your money-manifesting mojo, then you are going to LOVE today's episode with the incomparable and magnetic Gina Swire!   Gina is an internationally acclaimed self-love expert celebrated for her humorous and transformative speaking style and wildly popular self-love courses.    And she understands — and powerfully embodies — a truth that we hold dear at Desire on Fire: at the heart of living your desires is knowing that you're worthy to receive every good thing you want.    In today's episode, Gina talks about her own journey with money, how intimately it's linked to stories of self and self-love, and how you can re-imagine your relationship with money in ways that are expansive, sexy, and wildly abundant.    What you'll get out of today's episode:   What holds us back from truly breaking money barriers in our lives Identifying your energetic minimum — and resetting it to accommodate your desires What her dad told her before he died that changed her life A very sexy exercise that will totally change how you relate to money Want to get a taste of Aimee + Ellie's teaching and the Desire on Fire Community, for FREE? Join The Pleasure Revolution, 5-Day Challenge, Aug 8-12, 2022.  Use the code PLEASURE at checkout, to register for free! www.thepleasurechallenge.com    Join us (and 300+ women!) in person at the Desire on Fire Experience event, October 29-30, in Southern California! www.desireonfirelive.com Code: DESIRE for $500 off the regular ticket price!   Explore our website: https://www.desireonfire.com/ Come and join our FB community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/DesireOnFire/ And connect with us on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/desireonfire/   Connect with Aimee: Check out my instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/aimeebatuski/   Connect with Ellie: Check out my instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/elliemontgomerie   Connect with Gina: Insta: https://www.instagram.com/ginaswire Website: https://www.ginaswire.com/  

Things at Desire on Fire have been in HUGE flux this year. Have you felt it, too?!   Ellie had her baby and took maternity leave. Aimee stepped into full-time management of the company while Ellie was away. Two new roles for both of them, both large and demanding in their own ways.   They've also been feeling into something new in this time: there are areas of day-to-day management of the company that neither one of them wants to lean into. In fact, these tasks now feel draining, exhausting, and full of frustration and resentment. But somebody's gotta do them, right?   So … now what?     If you're familiar with Human Design, you know that crisis has a way of revealing our deepest needs and truths about who we are and who we're not … if we're willing to listen.    After getting her own Human Design chart and reading done, Ellie invited Travis Day to come on the podcast and look at Aimee's chart, too.    In this conversation, Travis does a live reading — going over the places where Aimee and Ellie complement, fulfill, amplify, and challenge each other — and offering a simple, surprising clarity for how they can move forward in this time of flux and transformation.    PLUS — catch a surprise reading of Alex's chart for a peek into romantic possibilities for Aimee and Alex!    What's revealed in this episode: The breaking point that made Aimee and Ellie realize something had to change Why we're so attracted by the sexy spark of opposites  What causes anxiety and stress — and what we can do about it How to use simple emotions as powerful sign posts Why some people (like Alex) are super chaotic until they hit 30 — and what happens that “flips the switch”  Want to get a taste of Aimee + Ellie's teaching and the Desire on Fire Community, for FREE? Join The Pleasure Revolution, 5-Day Challenge, Aug 8-12, 2022.  Use the code PLEASURE at checkout, to register for free! www.thepleasurechallenge.com   Join us (and 300+ women!) in person at the Desire on Fire Experience event, October 29-30, in Southern California! www.desireonfirelive.com Code: DESIRE for $500 off the regular ticket price!   Explore our website: https://www.desireonfire.com/ Come and join our FB community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/DesireOnFire/ And connect with us on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/desireonfire/   Connect with Aimee: Check out my instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/aimeebatuski/   Connect with Ellie: Check out my instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/elliemontgomerie   Connect with Travis:  Instagram: Travis Day | Human Design (@travis.day) Website: Neutrino Seas Human Design   Looking for an intro for Human Design 101? Check out MyHumanDesign.com!  

A couple of weeks ago, I told you that I'd invited a guy I'd met once to join me for a 7-day tantra retreat for couples.    I'd been wanting to go on another Tantra retreat for a while, and I felt so called to this retreat for couples, even though I'm not currently in a relationship. And then I felt pulled to invite Alex Waters, even though I barely knew him at all.    I know, I know: on the surface, it doesn't make sense.    But I've learned something so important in these last few years: our true, soul-led desires make a deeper kind of sense. And they're worth following, for so many reasons.    There is SO much to share about those 7 days. So many challenges and unexpected moments of devotion and surrender, and I know that I am forever changed. This absolutely feels like an expansive beginning.    And as it turns out, Alex was the perfect partner for that week — open, vulnerable, adventurous, compassionate, all-in, and sexy af.    So in today's podcast, we sit down together and talk about our week together, what we learned, and what's next. This is what happens when you say an outrageous yes to an outrageous invitation! What you'll learn in this episode:  What agreements, boundaries, and intentions we had in place before the retreat How letting go of expectations created a space for exploration and play The things that surprised us the most The sexy assignments we had each day What triggered us — and how we moved through those moments together What's next for us (hint: I just got my tickets to Australia!)   Want to get a taste of Aimee + Ellie's teaching and the Desire on Fire Community, for FREE? Join The Pleasure Revolution, 5-Day Challenge, Aug 8-12, 2022.  Use the code PLEASURE at checkout, to register for free! www.thepleasurechallenge.com    Join us (and 300+ women!) in person at the Desire on Fire Experience event, October 29-30, in Southern California! www.desireonfirelive.com Code: DESIRE for $500 off the regular ticket price!   Explore our website: https://www.desireonfire.com/ Come and join our FB community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/DesireOnFire/ And connect with us on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/desireonfire/   Connect with Aimee: Check out my instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/aimeebatuski/   Connect with Ellie: Check out my instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/elliemontgomerie   Connect with Alex: Insta: https://www.instagram.com/alexanderwaters

My friend Kim Mellor is a total powerhouse. She's a manifestation queen, a coach, a podcaster, a changer of lives.    She was so used to harnessing her masculine side — the doer, the achiever, the get-er-done mentality. She had mastered mindset and business strategies for success.    But she said she always felt like something was missing. There was a part of her that was hidden away. Suffocated, tamped down, numbed.    Like a lot of Brits, she was shy about talking about sex and desire. But it was more than that — it was like she couldn't speak her truth when it mattered most. She avoided conflict. She couldn't ask for what she wanted in relationships, and consequently was attracting connections that left her feeling lonely and resentful.   When we met in Bali 18 months ago, we immediately hit it off. She was surrounded by women who embody a different way of approaching desire, sex, success, and work. It was triggering for her … but it was also undeniably appealing.    I could sense in her this desire to start embracing her feminine energy — to say yes to more softness, surrender, rest, and trust in the guidance of her inner knowing.    In this interview, we talk about what happened when she finally said yes to Pleasure Mastery — what came up, what challenged her, what shifted, and what has totally transformed for her in just over a year.    What you'll learn in this episode: What happens when a manifestation queen also becomes a Pleasure Queen The major thing that blocks women from saying yes to a desire-led life What's underneath all this work around pleasure (it's probably not what you think) The biggest thing Kim has gotten from this work, and how it has affected every area of life, love, and business   Want to get a taste of Aimee + Ellie's teaching and the Desire on Fire Community, for FREE? Join The Pleasure Revolution, 5-Day Challenge, Aug 8-12, 2022.  Use the code PLEASURE at checkout, to register for free! www.thepleasurechallenge.com    Join us (and 300+ women!) in person at the Desire on Fire Experience event, October 29-30, in Southern California! www.desireonfirelive.com Code: DESIRE for $500 off the regular ticket price!   Explore our website: https://www.desireonfire.com/ Come and join our FB community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/DesireOnFire/ And connect with us on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/desireonfire/   Connect with Aimee: Check out my instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/aimeebatuski/   Connect with Ellie: Check out my instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/elliemontgomerie   Connect with Kim: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/kimmellor_ Website: https://www.kimmellor.com/

We're often conditioned to see an intense “down” — time of loss, grief, anger, struggle, jealousy, betrayal, stuck-ness — as something we need to get past as quickly as possible so we can get back to having fun and experiencing pleasure.    Our culture says that feeling “up” is good and feeling “down” is bad, which can lead us to compulsive behaviors that momentarily make us feel good — even when they're not healthy for us long-term and actually pull us away from the things we say we want the most.    I recently sat down with my good friend Paige Wilhide. You may know her as an amazing breakup coach or the emcee at our Desire on Fire Live events.    In this episode, we talked about the reckoning and awakening that brought her to her knees and landed her in Bali — and what she discovered about healing, real sisterhood, letting go of external validation from men, and the beauty in the mess.    There's something in Paige's journey that we can all relate to. And there's so much power in the question she wrestled with: What happens when we stop hiding out from the transformative work that our down time is inviting us into?    And could it be that the pain we're avoiding right now is the very thing that, when faced honestly, would finally allow us to experience our desires and pleasures at their fullest? What you'll learn in this episode: What it means to “approve” of the down times — and why it's so crucial Why Paige chose to enter a 12-Step recovery program, and what she learned from the initial  “withdrawal” period The invitation from Aimee that was the turning point What happened when she shared vulnerably at her first women's circle in Bali How to deal with this one HUGE misconception about desire that many women have Join us (and 300+ women!) in person at the Desire on Fire Experience event, October 29-30, in Southern California! www.desireonfirelive.com Code: DESIRE for $500 off the regular ticket price!   Explore our website: https://www.desireonfire.com/ Come and join our FB community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/DesireOnFire/ And connect with us on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/desireonfire/   Connect with Aimee: Check out my instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/aimeebatuski/   Connect with Ellie: Check out my instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/elliemontgomerie   Connect with Paige: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/paigewilhide/ Website: https://www.breakupbreakthrough.com/

One of the biggest struggles of the personal/spiritual growth community right now is the tendency to trip into spiritual bypassing.    The wounded parts of ourselves are too painful, so people default to nothing but “love and light!”    Adrian Ellison is here to disrupt that unhealthy tendency. She's a modern-day medicine woman out of Austin TX who understands that the Shadow is a critical part of our wholeness. When we deny it, it doesn't go away. It runs the show. Only when we allow ourselves to see it do we have a chance of operating from a more grounded, healed place.    Today, through her Awaken the Medicine community, she shows people how to acknowledge, understand, and integrate their Shadows so that they can activate their own intuitive healer within.    This is such a powerful episode with so much that is essential for us to understand right now.    In this episode, you'll learn: What shadow work is, what it isn't, and why it's a non-negotiable part of true growth How un-dealt with shadows can manifest in chronic physical, emotional, and relational illness What's going on in the brain — and how to get out of triggered unconscious response How shadow work can heal pieces of us we didn't even know were wounded Concrete ways in which this work helps us deal in a healthy way with relational conflict — even the really big stuff   ----   Join us (and 300+ women!) in person at the Desire on Fire Experience event, October 29-30, in Southern California! www.desireonfirelive.com Code: DESIRE for $500 off the regular ticket price!   Explore our website: https://www.desireonfire.com/ Come and join our FB community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/DesireOnFire/ And connect with us on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/desireonfire/   Connect with Aimee: Check out my instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/aimeebatuski/   Connect with Ellie: Check out my instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/elliemontgomerie   Connect with Adrian: Insta: https://www.instagram.com/adrianellison/ Website: https://www.awakenthemedicine.com/am-community

Staying emotionally, physically, sexually, and spiritually intimate is challenging enough for any of us, at any time in life.    But add to that mix a newborn — with the sleep deprivation, body changes, constant outflow of energy and limited inflow, and the vulnerability of needing so many new things and making so many adjustments — and the dance of intimacy takes on many unexpected steps.    So how do you keep the dance sexy? How do you stay sensual, playful, and open while navigating the challenges of new parenthood?    When it comes to cultivating unguarded communication, connected conflict resolution, and transformational sex for committed couples — there's no better pair than Megan Lambert and James Mattingley.    Both as a couple themselves and as coaches, these two are amazing at embodying the sacred feminine and masculine while keeping it extremely real and down to earth.    In this interview, I go deep with both Megan and James and ask questions about many of the challenges couples face in this new chapter of their lives: making time for intimacy, learning to see the tender need underneath the complaint, getting to know your body all over again, and taking radical responsibility for the quality of connection.    I learned so much from these two in this conversation, and I know you will, too, no matter where you are in your journey.    What You'll Learn In This Episode:    The biggest things that have changed since Megan and James's baby was born The choices we have in every moment of conflict and complaint The hilarious (and oh-so-honest!) nickname they have for their baby How Megan got reacquainted with her pleasure, and how they rediscovered their sex How they keep it sensual and attentive, even when things feel crazy The counter-intuitive truth about spontaneity  Megan and James's favorite daily tools for nourishing connection Explore our website: https://www.desireonfire.com/ Come and join our FB community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/DesireOnFire/ And connect with us on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/desireonfire/   Connect with Aimee: Check out my instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/aimeebatuski/   Connect with Ellie: Check out my instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/elliemontgomerie   Connect with Megan here:  IG - https://www.instagram.com/megandlambert Website - https://www.megandlambert.com/ Connect with James here:  IG: https://www.instagram.com/james.mattingley Website: https://www.jamesmattingley.com/

This is Aimee, and I recently had an experience that was exciting, expanding, and full of surprises of all kinds — my first time having sex with another woman.    This felt like a big deal for a number of reasons (which I share in this episode), so I invited my dear friend Kelley Bode back to the podcast to interview me and have a real, no-holds-barred convo about this encounter.    In this episode, you'll get it all: the draw I couldn't deny, the ways I felt challenged, how I stayed true to myself, and all the juicy (and oily!) details of the night itself.    This is a pretty vulnerable share for me, but I want to explore it out loud, because my hope is that it can bring some opening for other women who might have been in the same place as I was.    I'm on this journey to honor and listen to ALL of my desire — which includes both my sacred “yes” and my sacred “no.” And part of this work is recognizing when (and why) something that's been a “no” for a long time might become a “yes” when the person, place, and time are in alignment.    I think you're gonna love this fun, sexy, playful, electric conversation!   What you'll learn in this episode:   My past experiences of desiring women — and how this time was different How this woman challenged my Erotic Blueprint in super surprising ways Why it's totally possible to have a desire and not be attached to its immediate fulfillment How I used super-clear, up-front communication to make this experience the most fulfilling it could be (and what we miss out on when we don't say the thing that needs to be said) What this “means” about my sexual orientation (probably not what you expect) ---- Join us (and 300+ women!) in person at the Desire on Fire Experience event, October 29-30, in Southern California! www.desireonfirelive.com Code: DESIRE for $500 off the regular ticket price!   Explore our website: https://www.desireonfire.com/ Come and join our FB community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/DesireOnFire/ And connect with us on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/desireonfire/   Connect with Aimee: Check out my instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/aimeebatuski/   Connect with Ellie: Check out my instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/elliemontgomerie   Connect with Kelley Bode: Check out Kelley's Instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/kelleymbode    Resources mentioned in this episode: Betty Dodson - My Romantic Love Wars https://bookshop.org/books/my-romantic-love-wars-a-sexual-memoir/9781522685142 David Deida: https://deida.info/

The incomparable Cait Scudder joined us in March, in her 3rd trimester with her second baby — and she is ALIVE with wisdom, clarity, and the real power of a woman who knows who she is and who is willing to hold and share the fullness of her true self.    In 2017, Cait was a scrappy solopreneur expat in Bali. She'd moved there to be with her now-husband Toby, trying to get a side hustle going, not quite sure where she belonged and seriously struggling with imposter syndrome.    Five years later, she's a lit-up, wildly successful, empowered, Forbes-featured, TEDx-speaking, podcast-hosting entrepreneur with over $15M in client revenue.    And here's what we love even more: she doesn't hide the tough stuff. She is so honest, so genuine, so no-holds-barred about both the glory and the struggle. It's easy to see why clients love her and why she is a mentor and inspiration to so many — including us. You're going to love this conversation!   What you'll learn from Cait in this episode:   Her journey from teacher to multi-7-figure business coach Harnessing the real power of our multidimensional selves What Cait says saved her from postpartum depression The importance of a solid backend in your biz How she handles “Mom Guilt” (it's a real thing) Explore our website: https://www.desireonfire.com/ Come and join our FB community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/DesireOnFire/ And connect with us on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/desireonfire/   Connect with Cait:  www.cait.co Check out Cait's Instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/caitscudder/  Connect with Aimee: Check out my instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/aimeebatuski/   Connect with Ellie: Check out my instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/elliemontgomerie

If you've experienced the journey of pregnancy or have been curious about it, you've probably already noticed how fraught it can be. There are so many opinions, voices, and expectations out there about what to do, what not to do, what to eat, and how it all “should” be.    What if there's a way to step outside all those clamoring cultural voices and just tune inward?    As you know, our very own Ellie just had her baby on May 23rd!    In this unique Q&A (while she was still pregnant), Ellie offers her firsthand experience of cultivating a pregnancy journey that has been honest, nourished, sensual, and deeply connected to her body's innate wisdom. She shares how she plans to spend those essential first 40 days with her new baby boy, how she's stayed healthy, her surprising cravings, why she's planning for a home birth, and so much more.     In this episode, you'll learn about: Holding sacred boundaries when it comes to talking about your pregnancy and birth choices Doulas and midwives: what's the difference? Trusting and surrendering to the process of becoming a mother How staying in touch with sensuality can dramatically shift your pregnancy experience   This episode was recorded live in our Inner Circle Membership!   Ellie's Pregnancy Resources mentioned in the episode:   Links to order Juice Plus:  Capsules (I use fruit, veggie, berry and vegan omegas) Shakes    Why I take Juice Plus as my prenatal   Body Oil, Burt's Bees Mama Hydrating & Smoothing Skin Care with Vitamin E, 100% Natural, 4 Ounce   My doula    Books: Spiritual Midwifery: Fourth Edition   The Fourth Trimester: A Postpartum Guide to Healing Your Body, Balancing Your Emotions, and Restoring Your Vitality   The First Forty Days: The Essential Art of Nourishing the New Mother Join us (and 300+ women!) in-person at the Desire on Fire Experience event, October 1-2 in Southern California! www.desireonfirelive.com Code: DESIRE for $500 off the regular ticket price!   Explore our website: https://www.desireonfire.com/ Come and join our FB community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/DesireOnFire/ And connect with us on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/desireonfire/   Connect with Aimee: https://www.instagram.com/aimeebatuski/   Connect with Ellie: https://www.instagram.com/elliemontgomerie  

We love inviting aligned male energy into the Desire on Fire orbit!     Bryan Reeves is a former US Air Force Captain — a man's man in the eyes of the world who grew up with all the emotion-denying messages that young American boys and men grow up with.    After a debilitating heartbreak in his late 20s, he finally decided to undertake the huge journey back to himself. He learned how to break free from the damaging social conditioning that was keeping him from experiencing real love and intimacy, and today he is a globally-renowned relationship coach and author.    We discuss some of the major struggles men and women face today in relationships, including how to have authentic, skillful communication and how to navigate conflict in a way that preserves deep respect, love, and connection. Ladies, this is the perfect episode to listen to with your partner!    In this episode, we explore:   How healthy relationships can help balance and soothe our nervous systems   A game-changing way to approach honesty (we're often missing a secret ingredient) Why “controlling” your emotions isn't the answer — and what you actually need for better wellbeing and life-giving relationships     Connect with Bryan: https://bryanreeves.com/ https://www.instagram.com/bryanreevesinsight/ http://www.youtube.com/c/BryanReevesOfficial   "The Boundaries Program: Relationships Suck Without Boundaries!" is on sale at https://bryanreeves.com/Boundaries/  Join us (and 300+ women!) in-person at the Desire on Fire Experience event, October 1-2 in Southern California! www.desireonfirelive.com Code: DESIRE for $500 off the regular ticket price!   Explore our website: https://www.desireonfire.com/ Come and join our FB community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/DesireOnFire/ And connect with us on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/desireonfire/   Connect with Aimee: https://www.instagram.com/aimeebatuski/   Connect with Ellie: https://www.instagram.com/elliemontgomerie

You've heard us (Ellie and Aimee) talk a lot about the live Desire on Fire Experience — but what are the actual experiences of women who have attended?    In this episode, we dive into a conversation with Jeanette, Caitlin, and Rachelle — three amazing past Desire on Fire Experience attendees. These women all came to The Experience from very different places. They were in varying seasons of life, had individual longings and struggles, and (as you'll hear) all had distinct responses to specific moments of the event.    They offer an intimate, courageous look at what they found inside The Experience: what they felt confronted by, what broke them open, and what's changed for them since.    We know you're going to love this conversation, and hopefully you'll hear some of your own story and feel the possibility of what The Experience could offer you.    In this episode, you'll hear about:   All the judgements, discomforts, and insecurities that came up for them along the way Learning how to discern resistance — and knowing when it's right to break through and say “yes” anyway What we can do when we encounter women who have what we wish we had What has shifted for these women as a result of participating in the Experience and other courses through Desire on Fire PLUS — how to save $500 on the upcoming Desire on Fire Experience in October 2022 Connect with Caitlin Lili: Instagram: https://instagram.com/iamcaitlinlili   Connect with Rachelle Hoppel: Instagram: https://instagram.com/rachellehopps   Connect with Jeanette Soloma Hale: Instagram: https://instagram.com/solomafitness Join us (and 300+ women!) in-person at the Desire on Fire Experience event, October 1-2 in Southern California! www.desireonfirelive.com Code: DESIRE for $500 off the regular ticket price!   Explore our website: https://www.desireonfire.com/ Come and join our FB community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/DesireOnFire/ And connect with us on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/desireonfire/   Connect with Aimee: https://www.instagram.com/aimeebatuski/   Connect with Ellie: https://www.instagram.com/elliemontgomerie

This week I had the opportunity to sit down with two dear friends who are both birth goddesses and amazing mothers, Sasha and Megan, and absorb their wisdom for empowered pregnancy, birth and postpartum. Sasha is a trained midwife, relationship and sexuality coach and postpartum guide and Megan is master certified intimacy and desire expert helping people to experience better love, sex and relationships. They both share the intimate moments of their birthing journeys including the eerily similar visualizations they both had during conception, their experiences with home births, and the inspiring details of their fourth trimesters. We discuss: The behind-the-scenes of their home births and the incredible emotional and physical transformations they each experienced The importance of autonomy during your pregnancy and postpartum How both Sasha and Megan recovered postpartum (they majorly expanded my view of what's possible to receive!)  Connect with Sasha: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/sasha_kerkmann_hood/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thewildrootbirth/   Connect with Megan:  Website: www.megandlambert.com Instagram: www.instagram.com/megandlambert Join us (and 300+ women!) in-person at the Desire on Fire Experience event, October 1-2 in Southern California! www.desireonfirelive.com Code: DESIRE for $500 off the regular ticket price!   Explore our website: https://www.desireonfire.com/ Come and join our FB community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/DesireOnFire/ And connect with us on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/desireonfire/   Connect with Aimee: https://www.instagram.com/aimeebatuski/   Connect with Ellie: https://www.instagram.com/elliemontgomerie  

In this episode we go all the way back to the beginning with special guest Ashae Sundara, a feminine leadership coach and artist, to how she first got started as an entrepreneur (hint: it's very different from what she's doing now!!). We get into the nitty-gritty of what she's moved through to create a massive empire impacting thousands of women, and become a 7+ figure mentor to female leaders. We relish over the synchronicities in all of our stories from our shared passion for holistic wellness to finding ourselves through pleasure, embodiment and growing into our truest selves. We discuss: How Ashae's idea to bridge money and sex in her teachings has made her so successful What to do when past friends and family don't understand or align with your current desires or mission What it takes to truly follow your passions and use your voice (especially when others around you may not agree with you)   Connect with Ashae:   https://www.ashaesundara.com https://www.instagram.com/ashaesundara/   Join us (and 300+ women!) in-person at the Desire on Fire Experience event, October 1-2 in Southern California! www.desireonfirelive.com Code: DESIRE for $500 off the regular ticket price!   Explore our website: https://www.desireonfire.com/ Come and join our FB community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/DesireOnFire/ And connect with us on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/desireonfire/   Connect with Aimee: https://www.instagram.com/aimeebatuski/   Connect with Ellie: https://www.instagram.com/elliemontgomerie

This week we're chatting with one of our very own Pleasure Mastery graduates, Suzan Taylor! Suzan has been on an incredible journey from being overly independent to falling in love with herself and becoming the ultimate receiving queen.    Suzan bravely opens up about her battles with burnout, depression and low self-confidence and how a single swipe on a dating app and a yoni massage transported her into a whole new world of unimaginable pleasure and undeniable self-growth.  We discuss:   Her journey from self-loathing and body shame to OWNING her beauty (and falling in love with wearing lingerie!)  The major resistance she felt to diving into personal growth work, and the magic that's come as she's continued to get out of her own way and say YES How she let go of numbing habits and opened up to FEEL… and how that's laid the groundwork for her juicy new romance   Connect with Suzan: https://www.instagram.com/self_love_and_pleasure/   Explore our website: https://www.desireonfire.com/ Come and join our FB community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/DesireOnFire/ And connect with us on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/desireonfire/   Connect with Aimee: Check out my instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/aimeebatuski/   Connect with Ellie: Check out my instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/elliemontgomerie

It's easy to get so focused on becoming the woman you want to be that you forget to look up at your surroundings! Today's episode is all about Feng Shui and will give you the permission you may need to upgrade your space from “home” to “sanctuary.”   This week's guest is our new friend Patricia Lohan — Feng Shui expert, author, and master manifester. We learn a ton about the importance of our physical environment, how it can impact everything from intimacy to abundance, and simple changes we can make to become magnets for what we truly desire.   We discuss:   Common misconceptions about Feng Shui and how it REALLY works    Why your physical space is one of the most powerful tools for manifestation   Patricia's tips and tricks for setting up your space to call in what you deeply desire, whether that's a love match, success in your business, a family, a life of travel, etc!   Connect with Patricia: https://instagram.com/powerhouse.fengshui   https://www.freefengshuicourse.com/   https://patricialohan.com/   https://www.youtube.com/c/PatriciaLohan Come and join our FB community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/DesireOnFire/   Explore our website: https://www.desireonfire.com/   And connect with us on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/desireonfire/   Connect with Aimee: https://www.instagram.com/aimeebatuski/   Connect with Ellie: https://www.instagram.com/elliemontgomerie

We had an unbelievably eye-opening experience this week with our friend Kyle Mercer— master coach, guru, and the creator and founder of Inquiry Method (a powerful coaching modality that he's currently teaching inside of our Desire on Fire Apprenticeship Program).    In this episode, Kyle guides us both through somatic techniques and practices LIVE, and offers us an opportunity to release our burdens so we can open more fully to the present moment.   We dig into:   How the identity of “successful business owners” and our relationship to work, productivity and goals had both helped us and held us back  What's coming up for Ellie as she prepares for her maternity leave and transforms from maiden to mother  What Kyle appreciates, adores and celebrates about the feminine (this really moved us to hear!) As always, we love to connect with you, so please send us a message on Instagram with your takeaways from this episode! https://www.instagram.com/desireonfire/   Kyle's website: https://www.lifeataltitude.com/ Kyle's Instagram: www.instagram.com/inquirymethod Kyle's Book available on Amazon: https://www.amazon.co.uk/Life-Altitude-Elevating-Think-Experience-ebook/dp/B08JHRY1F3/ref=sr_1_1?crid=1S01MM6FIPBOZ&keywords=life+at+altitiude+kyle+mercer&qid=1649329934&s=books&sprefix=life+at+altitiude+kyle+mercer%2Cstripbooks%2C52&sr=1-1-spell Explore our website: https://www.desireonfire.com/ Come and join our FB community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/DesireOnFire/   Connect with Aimee: https://www.instagram.com/aimeebatuski/   Connect with Ellie: https://www.instagram.com/elliemontgomerie

We are relishing in sisterhood this week with a warm, illuminating episode with my friends Sheree Savage, a feminine leadership coach, and Alee Reina Hoffman, a transformational coach, on our life-changing time together at the International School of Temple Arts, Level 1 Retreat.   I open up about how I faced my fear of rejection during the retreat, and the magic I've experienced from following my desires, even at the risk of hearing “no.”   We digest our nourishing yet confronting experiences, our revitalized takeaways, and reveal how the retreat opened our hearts and the paths that led us to the parts of ourselves we've each denied or suppressed.   We discuss:   How recognizing problematic patterns within us can lead to necessary transformation and freedom   The power of saying “no” and all its fulfilling outcomes   Accepting loss and adapting to the new revelations life has to offer   Connect with Alee: https://www.instagram.com/aleereina/ Website: https://aleereinahoffman.com/   Connect with Sheree: https://shereesavage.com/   Join our Intimacy Styles Masterclass April 12th!  https://www.desireonfire.com/the-intimacy-styles-masterclass/   As always, we love connecting with you, so feel free to reach out to us on Instagram to share your favorite takeaways! https://www.instagram.com/desireonfire/   Explore our website: https://www.desireonfire.com/   Join our FB community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/DesireOnFire/   Connect with Aimee: https://www.instagram.com/aimeebatuski/   Connect with Ellie: https://www.instagram.com/elliemontgomerie

We are flipping the script this week by giving you the male perspective with our guest, Zach Watson, who Aimee's known for almost a decade. Zach is a husband, father, accountability coach, author and is currently killing the game on TikTok, where he advocates for dad's participation in pregnancy and fatherhood.   Tune into our honest conversation on marriage, masturbation, pregnancy, addiction, cheating, and so much more in today's episode.   We dive into:   How to invite healthy conversations about sex and self pleasure in relationships without it being shadowed by shame or guilt The complexities and nuances of infidelity (it takes two to tango!) The role of men in pregnancies and how their duties and stresses are often overlooked TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@zachthinkshare?lang=en Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/realzachthinkshare/ Join our upcoming Intimacy Styles Masterclass, on April 12th: https://www.desireonfire.com/the-intimacy-styles-masterclass/   Explore our website: https://www.desireonfire.com/ Come and join our FB community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/DesireOnFire/ And connect with us on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/desireonfire/   Connect with Aimee: Check out my instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/aimeebatuski/   Connect with Ellie: Check out my instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/elliemontgomerie

Birth is the ultimate surrender… and we don't just mean birthing babies. Birth can come in many different forms in our lives through businesses, relationships, opportunities, all of which we've experienced at different points in our journeys. But this week, we're especially focused on babies!   This episode is all about birthing babies, partners, and businesses as the two of us sit down and chat about Ellie's pregnancy journey that's almost at the finish line! We talk about Ellie's experience working with a doula and preparing for birth, and the many ways she's being worked by the process.   We discuss:   How Ellie knew she was ready to get pregnant (and the many twists and turns that preceded her claiming that desire!)   What to do when your partner doesn't react the way you want/expect them to – whether that's to a pregnancy announcement or anything else!    Ellie's experience with the medical birthing system and the resources that have supported her in making aligned choices for her birth journey.   As always, we love connecting with you, so feel free to reach out to us on Instagram to share your favorite takeaways! https://www.instagram.com/desireonfire/   Ellie's doula: https://instagram.com/tranquilitybyhehe   Join our Intimacy Styles Masterclass April 12th!  https://www.desireonfire.com/the-intimacy-styles-masterclass/   Explore our website: https://www.desireonfire.com/ Join our FB community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/DesireOnFire/   Connect with Aimee: Check out my instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/aimeebatuski/   Connect with Ellie: Check out my instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/elliemontgomerie