Brown Bag Mornings

The squad tries to help a listener named Diana navigate a "mean girl" situation after her friend lost 100 lbs on Ozempic but is now "fake flexing" online like it's all 5:00 a.m. gym discipline. Between the friendship drama, the crew investigates if ASAP Rocky was actually wearing a thong on stage and hears a legendary story about Barack Obama scoring tickets to a Tupac show in the '90s.

We're diving into the absolute drama of Homie Helpline, where a listener is ready to cancel a girls' trip because her friend lost 100 pounds on Ozempic and transformed into a total "mean girl" baddie online!

The squad attempts to navigate a "Jerry Springer" level Homie Helpline where a listener discovers her cousin is six months pregnant by her ex, leading to a heated debate over "Cousin Code" and wild suggestions of "throwing primas down the stairs". Between the family drama, the crew investigates the disturbing protein-packed world of cockroach milk and reacts to Shohei Ohtani's shocking secret second baby announcement.

It's a full-blown family war on Homie Helpline as a listener realizes her cousin is pregnant with her favorite ex's baby—and the crew debates if a "baby shower confrontation" is the move!

The squad attempts to help Sandra navigate a "family soap opera" after discovering her daughter's new 45-year-old boyfriend is actually the mom's own former high school hookup. Between the relationship trauma, the crew investigates why tacos now cost $8, reacts to a Knicks fan trying to kiss his Narcan savior, and roasts Howie D for "becoming Puerto Rican" decades after the Backstreet Boys peaked. [Edited by @iamdyre

We're diving into the absolute chaos of the New York Knicks parade, from "orange thong" light pole brawls to a man who woke up from an overdose and immediately tried to kiss the woman helping him!

The squad tackles a chaotic Homie Helpline featuring secret pregnancies with in-laws and a legendary pool party encounter involving a very heavy pot of Mexican rice. Between the family drama, the crew investigates why Becky G is being accused of "treason" for her jersey choices and warns the world about a Brazilian psychic predicting "Asian" aliens in Hyundai's will abduct Neymar. [Edited by @iamdyre

Today on Brown Bag Mornings, we're breaking down the controversy surrounding Becky G's loyalties during the World Cup, and it's getting heated!

The squad attempts a high-stakes intervention for Valerie, who suspects her man has a secret family after he disappears every Sunday and misses Father's Day, leading to wild stories about "Sunday sharters" and secret kid "joke" manipulations. Between the relationship chaos, the crew roasts LeBron James for his comments about stay-at-home moms and investigates the conspiracy theory that Benny Blanco used witchcraft to land Selena Gomez. [Edited by @iamdyre

The squad is losing it over LeBron James claiming he could never date a stay-at-home mom while his wife, Savannah, is a literal mogul!

The squad helps a homie named Carlos determine if he should confront his friend after a 14-year-old guest was caught "looking for the bathroom" in a bedroom where $300 went missing. Between the family drama, the crew roasts Ray J for getting called "musty" on a live stream and reacts to Matt Damon's questionable attempt at a rap career for charity. [Edited by @iamdyre

Things get out of control as Ray J gets embarrassed on live stream after his girl says he smells a little "musty" instead of like expensive Baccarat cologne!

The squad navigates a high-stakes Homie Helpline where a father is fighting for the right to name his son "Junior," leading to wild stories about secret identities and a baby named Gonzalo who already looks like a construction foreman. Between the family drama, the crew celebrates the NY Knicks' historic championship win while reacting to Jalen Brunson's dad being a world-class hater on live TV. [Edited by @iamdyre

The squad is sounding the alarm on dangerous SoCal rip currents—stay out of the water unless you want to face Concrete's "sea monster" fears!

The squad attempts to rescue Edwin from a "Paraguay Princess" who is using his World Cup tickets as a "blessing from God" while leaving his dinner invites on read. Between the relationship chaos, the crew investigates whether Shakira used a "swollen" stunt double for the World Cup opening ceremony and reacts to a Michigan scammer who got caught with a bag of chocolate coins instead of $700k in gold. [Edited by @iamdyre

The crew is dissecting the "sus" World Cup opening ceremony where fans are convinced a sunglasses-wearing stunt double took Shakira's place on stage because she didn't have her signature "chickenpox mark"!

The squad attempts an intervention for Cat, who is torn over a secret "arts and crafts" love letter revealing her sister's "lesbian for fun" past while her marriage was falling apart,. Between the family drama, the crew roasts ASAP Rocky for his risque "G-string" fashion choices and investigates why scientists are using tax dollars to bake sourdough with 5,000-year-old caveman gut-yeast. [Edited by @iamdyre ⚽] Chapters (00:00) Don't You Know I'm Local (2:38) Chisme (5:00) Rap Sheet (8:38) Petty Police (13:00) Scrolling (19:34) The Weather W/ Concrete! (21:46) Homie Helpline (33:27) World Cup! (37:32) Ice Cube Tix! (47:29) Don't You Know I'm Local (51:28) Chisme (53:31) Money Moves (56:31) Studious Foo (1:01:42) Play Ball Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

The Brown Bag team are taking over the pitch with the world premiere of their official World Cup anthem, and the crew is convinced it's a bigger hit than the Thriller album! ⚽

The squad navigates a messy Homie Helpline for a girl being edited out of family graduation photos and a Caribbean artist whose Salvi in-laws allegedly towed his car out of pure spite. Between the relationship drama, the crew breaks down Britney Bell's doctorate dissertation on Nick Cannon's family tree and why Tom Brady decided to name his new drink "Good Nut". [Edited by @iamdyre

The squad is losing it over Britney Bell's genius-level pettiness after she earned a doctorate in psychology just to write a dissertation on her own complicated "family tree" with Nick Cannon.

[Full Episode] The squad stages an intervention for 28-year-old Lindsay, who feels like a prisoner in her own home due to her mother's heavy-duty "Mexican parent" guilt and refusal to let her move out. Between the family drama, the crew roasts Kanye West's bizarre cow-themed birthday video and provides a questionable survival guide for the upcoming alien invasion. [Edited by @iamdyre

The squad is losing it over Kanye West's latest "VJO" behavior after he dropped a birthday music video featuring lingerie and a cow—and we're debating at what age you officially become a "Viejo."

The squad tries to figure out if 18-year-old Melvin is truly in love or if he's about to be "sold for parts" by an international student in San Francisco his family claims is a Chinese spy. Between the relationship intervention, the crew roasts Kevin Durant for pulling a "Homer Simpson" and hiding behind a bush at Nobu to escape the paparazzi with a mystery girl. [Edited by @iamdyre

We're kicking off World Cup week with a viral "Oxxo" remix of a Mexican classic that has the crew flabbergasted and ready to party! ⚽️

The squad dives into a spicy Homie Helpline for Jerry, whose girlfriend used a game of "Never Have I Ever" to reveal she once did "arts and crafts" with a friend who is still very much in the picture. Between the relationship drama, the crew questions human sanity after scientists successfully baked—and ate—sourdough bread using yeast harvested from a 5,000-year-old caveman mummy. [Edited by @iamdyre ✈️] Chapters (00:00) Don't You Know I'm Local (3:54) Chisme (6:48) Petty Police (10:22) Scrolling (14:32) The Weather! (16:30) Homie Helpline (38:17) Snoop Dogg & Mana Tix! (44:02) Don't You Know I'm Local (45:42) Chisme (48:23) Money Moves (53:11) Studious Foo Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

The squad is losing it after Doja Cat called Elon Musk a "frog-build looking Ewok" in a viral outcry to get her audio posts back on X.

Description: Alyssa discovers her boyfriend of five years has been cheating and now plans to expose him with screenshots hidden inside his graduation slideshow while live-streaming the fallout on TikTok. The Brown Bag crew also gets into 50 Cent addressing Diddy drama, a news crew allegedly stealing their style, World Cup scams, Latto's comments on Cardi B and Ice Spice, and FIFA's latest rule changes.Chapters: (00:00) Don't You Know I'm Local (04:59) Chismation (07:32) Petty Police (13:01) Scrolling (16:13) The Weather with Concrete Storm (17:38) Homie Helpline (52:13) Finish The Lyric for Snoop Tickets (57:40) Always on Time? What is Ja Rule Talking About? (58:59) Don't You Know I'm Local (63:25) Chismation (67:07) Rap Sheet (71:35) How To Hug A Kitty (75:11) Sports Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Description / Show Notes: Brown Bag starts local with NERDS making moves in the community

The squad navigates a heavy Homie Helpline for "Shy Mike," who abandoned his daughter 19 years ago and is now "stutter-stepping" around whether to reach out during his divorce. Between the family drama, the crew roasts Dame Dash for claiming Jay-Z has "cinnamon and doodoo" breath and investigates a Mr. Beast challenge winner caught with 261 kilos of marijuana. [Edited by @iamdyre

The squad is dissecting JLo's latest denial about her co-star romance rumors, but her track record of dating her leading men has the crew feeling skeptical.

[Full Episode] The squad attempts a spiritual intervention for Carla after she was served "breakup tea" by a mother-in-law she suspects is a witch, leading to terrifying listener stories about scorpions popping out of bodies and blood oaths. Between the brujeria drama, the crew roasts Sauce Walka for threatening to "smoke" Drake on a leaked call and breaks down Steph Curry's massive $1.1 billion move to a Chinese shoe brand. [Edited by @iamdyre

The squad investigates the viral phone call where Texas rapper Sauce Walka allegedly threatens to "smoke" Drake for sleeping with his baby mama. The Homie Helpline reaches peak levels of "scary" as Carla suspects her boyfriend's mom is a witch after a "special tea" made her sick, leading to insane stories of blood oaths and scorpions popping out of a woman's body. Don't You Know I'm Local, so we're roasting the "dot cake" trend that is just white people rebranding our childhood cortadillos because we have "bad marketing". Chisme with Angie reveals Vic's lowrider "date" with F1 star Lewis Hamilton, who was recently spotted on a "cutesy" bike ride with Kim Kardashian. Finally, we celebrate National Rotisserie Chicken Day with a "lazy hack" and some "spit roast" jokes that had the whole studio losing it. [Edited by @iamdyre

The squad helps a homie who dropped 90 pounds after a suspected "brujeria" curse while investigating why US Soccer used Diego Luna as their poster boy only to leave him off the World Cup roster. We also break down Jay-Z's savage Roots Picnic freestyle aimed at Drake and debate if Pete Davidson is sending a "bat signal" to Kim Kardashian by over-praising her acting. [Edited by @iamdyre

Things reach a peak level of weird as we help Martin, who is convinced his sudden medical issues are actually a brujo spell cast by a hookup he did dirty.

The squad attempts an intervention for Janessa, who had to use ChatGPT to write a Spanish confrontation script for her "monster-in-law" after years of being called fat and told her marriage wasn't real. Between the family drama, the crew roasts Khloe Kardashian for legally "owning" Tristan Thompson's embryos and forcing him into a vasectomy to finally end the baby mama cycle. [Edited by @iamdyre ✂️] Chapters (00:00) Don't You Know I'm Local (3:07) Chisme (5:12) Rap Sheet (7:37) Petty Police (11:13) Scrolling (14:48) The Weather (16:09) Homie Helpline (47:45) Disneyland Tix (50:27) Don't You Know I'm Local (56:02) Chisme (59:45) Studious Foo (1:02:45) Play Ball Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

The Petty Police investigate an insufferable Palm Beach cop who tried to ticket a woman for "manipulating a phone" with a hand she doesn't even have!

[Full Episode] The squad dives into the "scary" world of $60 East LA love spells and attempts to help a homie named Edward who "stumbled" into downloading a secret app to text his "favorite ex" while in a toxic relationship. Between the relationship drama, the crew breaks down how Kim Kardashian secured a second chance for the homies in the system and investigates why a minor league "bat dog" just ended a top Dodger prospect's season. [Edited by @iamdyre

The Homie Helpline reaches a peak level of "scary" as a caller admits to spending $60 on a "bruja" spell to trap his ex back into a relationship!

Chalino calls in because his 89-year-old grandpa is trying to date a 40-year-old woman from the carnicería, and the whole family thinks she's after his money. The crew also talks Benny Blanco's Selena Gomez confession, Bad Bunny manifesting his success, Meek Mill getting clowned, OC women getting scammed, and Chicharrito calling out Mexico fans. Chapters:  (00:00) Don't You Know I'm Local (02:58) Chismation (07:29) Petty Police (10:34) Scrolling (14:23) The Weather with Greg (16:11) Homie Helpline (35:43) Name The Disneyland Villain For Tickets (40:46) Amish Paradise (40:39) Don't You Know I'm Local (45:45) Chismation (49:20) Rap Sheet (53:45) Money Moves (61:56) Sports Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Description / Show Notes: Brown Bag Mornings kicks off with Benny Blanco admitting something about Selena Gomez that has everybody yelling “simp!”

The squad attempts a high-stakes intervention for Peter, whose toxic ex-girlfriend posted his "meat" on Instagram and is holding his cherished skateboard hostage until legendary skater P-Rod steps in to save the homie.. Between the relationship drama, the crew roasts Ray J for accidentally snitching on his own "rigged" MMA fight after getting knocked out cold by viral star Super Hot Fire. [Edited by @iamdyre

The squad is losing it after Ray J got flattened in a bare-knuckle MMA fight and immediately started snitching about a "plan" that went south backstage.

We hit a wild Homie Helpline for Nate, whose "accidental" namesake friend maxed out his cards for a $1,000 spree, and Marcy, who came home from an armed robbery stint to find her homie in Watts had been renting out her BMW to the whole complex! Don't You Know I'm Local, so we're debating the terrifying 140 mph "bullet buses" that might be terrorizing the 5 freeway soon just to get people to San Francisco in three hours. Mayor Karen Bass stops by to talk about her deep Latino roots, her first protest at age 10, and why collaboration is the only way to actually get things done in the city. Between the "scammer gem" of credit card disputes and Vic's personal beef with $40 SF parking, we're keeping it a hundred on the streets! [Edited by @iamdyre

[Full Episode] The squad attempts a high-stakes intervention for Peter after his toxic ex-girlfriend posted a "purple-headed yogurt slinger" to his car-themed Instagram burner in a bid for "closure." Between the "pecker" drama, the crew roasts Lupe Fiasco for blaming his forgotten lyrics on 90s LimeWire pirates and debates if Drake officially stole Concrete's cadence for his new Nike ad. [Edited by @iamdyre

The squad is roasting the absolute pettiness of Lupe Fiasco after he stopped his show to blame "dirty bastards" from the Limewire era for his own forgotten bars.

[Full Episode] The squad attempts to talk Nate out of "breaking kneecaps" after his day-one homie maxed out his credit cards while he was sitting in jail on three felonies. Between the betrayal drama, the crew investigates the $9 million c*****e bust hidden inside Kim Kardashian's Skims shipments and reacts to an Arsenal player getting his "whole cheeks" out on live TV. [Edited by @iamdyre ☃️] Chapters (00:00) Don't You Know I'm Local (2:28) Chisme (5:31) Box Talk (9:20) Scrolling (12:43) Petty Police (15:40) The Weather W/ Concrete! (17:20) Homie Helpline (42:53) Disneyland Tix! (47:14) Don't You Know I'm Local (52:25) Chisme (56:26) Money Moves (58:37) Studious Foo (1:04:04) Play Ball Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

The squad investigates the massive $4 million c*****e bust found inside Skims shipments and wonders if "Kilo Kim" is about to drop a "Coke White" collection. ❄️

The squad attempts a high-stakes intervention for Maggie, who is weeks away from giving birth and debating if her son should carry the last name of her "Day Zero" deadbeat ex, Bobby from Baldwin Park. Between the family drama, the crew roasts the Drake Hive for spamming Rihanna's comments with ice emojis and investigates the 140 mph "bullet bus" that might soon be terrorizing California freeways. [Edited by @iamdyre

We're diving into the "soft" move of Miley Cyrus's fiancé wanting to take her iconic last name to stand behind her legacy.

[Full Episode] The squad attempts to settle a "parenting war" for Jimmy after his 11-year-old was caught searching for "baddies" on Tubi, featuring a legendary caller's "spicy function" involving awkward PowerPoint presentations. Live from the Disneyland 70th celebration, the crew also roasts Cowboys QB Dak Prescott for allegedly getting caught at a bullfight with his ex's bridesmaid just months after their relationship "didn't make it off the dock". [Edited by @iamdyre

The squad is losing it over Dak Prescott allegedly being caught with his ex's bridesmaid at a bullfight just months after their relationship "didn't make it off the dock". We hit a wild Homie Helpline for Jimmy, whose 11-year-old was caught searching "hot girls" on the family TV, leading to a hilarious debate on whether a cake-filled "spicy function" presentation is the move. Don't You Know I'm Local, so we're saving your wallet with $1 summer movie deals at Regal while investigating Pete Davidson's "deadbeat" allegations after his baby mama whispered her frustrations on TikTok. We're also twerking for our mental health after a new study claims dancing beats anti-depressants and reacting to the terrifying "crack" of a fan getting hit by a foul ball while taking a selfie. [Edited by @iamdyre