Talking Your Way to Change

Psychological resistance is often unconscious and blocks our ability to change. It can be baffling, frustrating, and threatens the healing process. However, when used in a therapeutic manner it often leads to new growth and healing. However, it is a common natural part of being human. People who are seeking psychotherapy are a unique position of being able to examine in what ways they self-sabotage or get in their own way. --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/xan0/message

The story you tell others and yourself about your experiences in life begin with your ANS. It is helpful to practice how you shape your story. Take a minor irritation that you experienced and try telling it from the Safe and Connected State, the Fight or Flight state, and or Dorsal Vagal. You are the protagonist in your life story. You make choices. One of the choices you make is the story you tell yourself. The more habituated your story telling is the more likely you will fall into the traps of black and white or a perpetrator/victim stance, win/lose. --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/xan0/message

In this episode I give examples of everyday life events and trauma can trigger the process of neuroception and ANS response. I give some ideas for strategies of how to move from sympathetic into ventral and how to move up the ladder from dorsal state. --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/xan0/message

Learning about your ANS could change your life. --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/xan0/message

Using Belleruth Naparstek's guided imagery script an exercise for self protection, support, and love. https://www.amazon.com/Invisible-Heroes-Survivors-Trauma-They/dp/0553383744/ref=asc_df_0553383744/?tag=hyprod-20&linkCode=df0&hvadid=312039018893&hvpos=&hvnetw=g&hvrand=12416860290393824089&hvpone=&hvptwo=&hvqmt=&hvdev=c&hvdvcmdl=&hvlocint=&hvlocphy=9019559&hvtargid=pla-494331928777&psc=1 --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/xan0/message

The body scan can help you remain more connected to yourself and others. --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/xan0/message

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This episode relates how Joseph Campbell's Hero Journey nd how Dr. Clarissa Estes Women Who Run with Wolves La Loba-The Wolf Woman relates to the self-healing process in therapy. Stories and myths are can give us hope, interpretation, understanding, and wisdom all psychological capacities that that beyond emotion regulation skills. Estés, Clarissa Pinkola. (1992). Women who run with the wolves : myths and stories of the wild woman archetype. New York :Ballantine Books, --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/xan0/message

Guided imagery exercise of creating a safe place to visit with music. --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/xan0/message

This episode is an introduction to visualization exercises of a safe place as well as a guided demonstration of using one. --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/xan0/message

Using psychological concepts and a theoretical form of psychotherapy-(Jungian Therapy) offer an opinion or hypotheses about how we might be influenced by our collective unconscious to make our decisions. --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/xan0/message

Guided imagery is an easy to use multi-sensory relaxation-based practice that utilizes guided affirmations and soothing music to evoke images in the mind that are experienced by the body. --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/xan0/message

https://www.healthjourneys.com/ Strauss, J. L., Calhoun, P. S., & Marx, C. E. (2009). Guided imagery as a therapeutic tool in post-traumatic stress disorder. In P. J. Shiromani, T. M. Keane, & J. E. LeDoux (Eds.), Post-traumatic stress disorder: Basic science and clinical practice (pp. 363–373). Humana Press. https://doi.org/10.1007/978-1-60327-329-9_17 Bremner JD, Randall P, Scott TM, Bronen RA, Seibyl JP, Southwick SM, Delaney RC, McCarthy G, Charney DS, Innis RBAm J Psychiatry. 1995 Jul; 152(7):973-81. --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/xan0/message

This episode discusses how we can respond to our partner's reactivity. Is this conflict a story about the other person, yourself, or your communication patterns in the relationship. David Burns The Five Secrets of Effective Communication: the Disarming Technique Terry Real: the Adaptive Child and the Functional Adult --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/xan0/message

Radical Acceptance is about accepting life on life's terms. Radical Acceptance is a practice that has it's roots in Buddhism but most propagated by Marsha Linehan's Dialectical Behavioral Therapy in the world of psychotherapy. --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/xan0/message

This episode is an interview with Dr. Groninga, who talks about the evidence based treatment Dialectical Behavioral Therapy, which was developed in the late 1980s by psychologist Marsha M Lineham. DBT helps clients who have intense emotions that often lead to self-harm or sabotaging behavior and relationship patterns associated with problems in living. Dr. Groninga works at Minnesota Center for Psychology. --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/xan0/message

My special guest is Dr. Chris Anderson, owner of Innovative Psychological Consultants, an out-patient mental health clinic providing psychological assessment and testing, psychotherapy, and psychiatry in Maple Grove and serving the surrounding areas. Dr. Anderson has been in practice for 25 years. His passion for chemical dependency and mental health recovery stems from the belief that and despite people's fears that they will be judged or that their problems are unique, the reality is that people are people and their problems do not differ nearly as much as they perceive. Innovative Psychological Consultants, LLC @ 763-416-4137 www.ipc-mn.com --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/xan0/message

This episode defines cravings and discusses treatment approaches. The American Psychological Association defines a craving as an unrelenting desire, urge, or yearning. It is often a criterion for the diagnosis of drug addiction or alcoholism. It includes a recording that was originally created by Linda A Curran. It focuses attention and awareness on the breath, body sensations, and emotions can be used to promote distress tolerance , self-empowerment, and self-efficacy within the treatment of addiction. It uses imagery to target and work with longings and cravings. Brewer, J.A., Elwafi, H.M. & Davis, J.H. (2013). Craving to quit: psychological models and neurobiological mechanisms of mindfulness training as treatment for addictions. Psychology of addictive behaviors, 27(2), 366-379. Brewer, J. A. (2017). The Craving Mind: From cigarettes to smart phones to love - Why We Get Hooked and How We Can Break Bad Habits. Yale University Press. New Haven and London. Wise, R.A. (1988). The neurobiology of craving: Implications for understanding and treatment of addiction. Journal of Abnormal Psychology 97: 118–132. Witkiewitz, K. & Bowen, S. (2010). Depression, craving, and substance use following a randomized trial of mindfulness-based relapse prevention. Journal of consulting and clinical psychology, 78(3), 362-374. The Sober Curious Podcast & Sober Curious Book By Ruby Warrington --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/xan0/message

https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/?term=Kelly+JF&cauthor_id=32159228 AA's 12-Step approach follows a set of guidelines designed as “steps” toward recovery, and members can revisit these steps at any time. The 12 Steps are:9 We admitted we were powerless over alcohol—that our lives had become unmanageable. Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity. Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him. Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves. Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs. Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character. Humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings. Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all. Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others. Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it. Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God, as we understood Him, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out. Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these Steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs. --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/xan0/message

Update about release schedule. --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/xan0/message

ACT video --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/xan0/message

In this episode I talked with Matt S. Boone, co-author of Stop Avoiding Stuff: 25 Microskills to Face Your Fears & Do It Anyway about his book and Acceptance and Commitment Therapy. Matt leads me through an experiential exercise in which I become more in touch with what I am trying to avoid while doing paperwork. This process helps listeners to identify what they might be trying to avoid or control in their own lives. It educates the listeners about ACT. It discusses how our mental processes such as evaluating and judging despite being evolved processes for our survival can work against us. He touches on our values can act as motivators to helps us overcome our experiential avoidance. He differentiates between what is cognitive restructuring and cognitive diffusion. Finally, the interview ends on a personal note in which we both discuss how ACT has influenced our paths in coping with chronic pain. Sections: Introduction ACT and Avatars Experiential Exercise with Case Note How to identify what you might be avoiding. Evaluate Behaviors-Mental Processes Making Values a Verb Cognitive Defusion Personal Disclosures How to buy Matt's book: Stop Avoiding Stuff: 25 Microskills to Face Your Fears & Do It Anyway https://www.amazon.com/Stop-Avoiding-Stuff-Microskills-Anyway/dp/1684036054 http://matthewsboone.com/ --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/xan0/message

Alcohol abuse causes complex changes in the brain that drive the addiction, and understanding the powerful chemicals that are at play in driving such compulsive behavior is the first step toward developing self-compassion if you have an alcohol use disorder. Everyone has something about themselves that they don't like, something that causes them to feel shame, to feel insecure, inadequate, not enough. Self-compassion does not mean that we are not responsible for dealing with our lives, it doesn't mean we should be self-indulgent. Having an alcohol use disorder means you need support to fully recover. In our last episode I gave a few resources for getting this support. Today another resource is called Smart Recovery Online. They have weeklyonlue meetings, discussion forums, and support. Go to smartrecovery.org --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/xan0/message

The topic for today's episode is about problematic drinking. Alcoholism is a Form of Addiction National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism 1-888-308-4164 Hazelden Betty Ford: 1-844-569-8656 Recovery Happy Hour Podcast Addiction Unlimited --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/xan0/message

Telling your life story can be paradoxical: it can be empowering and it can be limiting. I offer three psychotherapy approaches to telling your story. Narrative, ACT, and the drama triangle. Narrative Therapy https://www.narrativetherapyinitiative.org/ Acceptance Commitment Therapy The Karpman Drama Triangle Explained: A Guide for Coaches, Managers, Trainers, Therapists - and Everybody Else Chris West --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/xan0/message

My message today is to use your little bits of leftover time. Those minutes between tasks that we tend to throw away. Gretchen Rubin in the Happiness Project identified the one-minute rule to create order in your life and the 5-minute rule is from CBT used for issues of procrastination. --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/xan0/message

Self-esteem is the sense of personal worth and a sense of personal competence, or put another way, my belief in my ability to have an effect on things. In this episode, I break this down even further: into 4 domains: Lovability, interpersonal power, meaningful work or engagement, and having a moral compass. Roberts, E. (2017, September 1). How Helping Others Improves Your Self-Esteem, HealthyPlace. Retrieved on 2021, April 3 from https://www.healthyplace.com/blogs/buildingselfesteem/2017/09/how-helping-others-improves-your-self-esteem Godin, G. and Kok, G. (1996) The Theory of Planned Behavior: a review of its applications to health-related behaviors. American Journal of Health Promotion, 11, 87–98. Harter, S. (1999) The Construction of the Self. A Developmental Perspective. Guilford Press, New York. Seligman, M.E.P. (1995) What You Can Change and What You Can't. Knopf, New York. Macdonald, G. (1994) Self esteem and the promotion of mental health. In Trent, D. and Reed, C. (eds), Promotion of Mental Health. Avebury, Aldershot, vol. 3, pp. 19–20. --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/xan0/message

Are your boundaries workable? Nedra Glover Tawwab. Set Boundaries, Find Peace A guide to reclaiming yourself. A Guide to Reclaiming Yourself Harriet Lerner. The Dance of Intimacy: A Woman's Guide to Courageous Acts of Courage in Key Relationships. Podcasts: Recovery Rocks; SobrieTea Party, Addiction Unlimited https://al-anon.org/ https://www.oprah.com/spirit/how-to-set-boundaries-brene-brown-advice#ixzz6qYBpo4ei --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/xan0/message

The general goal of ACT is to increase psychological flexibility – the ability to contact the present moment more fully as a conscious human being, and to change or persist in behavior when doing so serves valued ends. Psychological flexibility is established through six core ACT processes. Each of these areas are conceptualized as a positive psychological skill, not merely a method of avoiding psychopathology. Backman, Fredrik (20120. A Man Called Ove. Atria Books: New York. https://psychwire.com/harris/resources?gclid=Cj0KCQjw3duCBhCAARIsAJeFyPWJb3Rt8SAEas4xGu5mUxO9G8-OYeBLTqA4cKskFXgyjXAYGDzM70saAhr1EALw_wcB --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/xan0/message

In this episode I suggest that psychological flexibility and ego strength are similar concepts. Low psychological flexibility is correlated with depression, anxiety, and work difficulties. It suggests once again that it is our ability to cope with life on life terms that predicts our mental health wellness. --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/xan0/message

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In this episode I discuss grounding strategies that you can use to bring your chaotic mind back to the practical reality of the present moment. I offer 5 physical grounding strategies and 5 mental grounding strategies. --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/xan0/message

Trailer video --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/xan0/message

Knowing your values can lead to taking steps that will help you feel less stuck or trapped in what steps to take in your life's journey. https://www.valuescentre.com/ https://stevenchayes.com/category/values/ Niemiec, R. M. (2017). Character strengths interventions: A field-guide for practitioners. Cambridge, MA: Hogrefe. Affirmation of Personal Values Buffers Neuroendocrine and Psychological Stress Responses J. David Creswell,1 William T. Welch,1 Shelley E. Taylor,1 David K. Sherman,2 Tara L. Gruenewald,1 and Traci Mann1 1 University of California, Los Angeles, and 2 University of California, Santa Barbara --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/xan0/message

Video trailer for values episode --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/xan0/message

making a video --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/xan0/message

Daniel Siegel developed the Wheel of Awareness. The Wheel of awareness is a tool or a practice to direct awareness and promote more well-being in our lives. It's a visual metaphor of a bicycle wheel, where the awareness is lying at the center and all along the rim there are ‘known' elements where you can direct your focus. https://drdansiegel.com/ https://drdansiegel.com/wheel-of-awareness/ Seigel, D. J. (2010). Mindsight: The New Science of Personal Transformation. Bantam. New York. by Daniel J. Siegel, M.D. --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/xan0/message

Based on the research and my clinical experience I have created an 8-step approach to combating worry. Problem Productive Action Step Research Emotion Time of Day Present Moment Movement References: Berenbaum H, Thompson RJ, & Bredemeier K (2007). Perceived threat: Exploring its association with worry and its hypothesized antecedents. Behaviour Research and Therapy, 45, 2473–2482. doi:10.1016/j.brat.2007.03.015. LaFreniere, L. S., & Newman, M. G. (2019). Exposing worry's deceit: Percentage of untrue worries in generalized anxiety disorder treatment. Behavior Therapy. doi:10.1016/j.beth.2019.07.003 Leahy, Robert (2005). The Worry Cure: Seven Steps to Stop Worry from Stopping You. New York: Three Rivers Press. --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/xan0/message

Ford, Arielle (2012). Wabi Sabi Love: The Ancient Art of Finding Perfect Love in Imperfect Relationships. HarperOne: New York. This Valentine's Day give your partner the gift of loving their shortcomings. --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/xan0/message

Borkovec TD. The nature, functions, and origins of worry. In: Davey GCL, Tallis F, editors. Worrying: Perspectives on theory, assessment and treatment. Wiley; Oxford, England: 1994. pp. 5–33. Borkovec TD, Alcaine O, Behar ES. Avoidance theory of worry and generalized anxiety disorder. In: Heimberg R, Mennin D, Turk C, editors. Generalized anxiety disorder: Advances in research and practice. Guilford; New York: 2004. pp. 77–108. American Psychological Association defines worry as a state of mental distress or agitation due to concern about an impending or anticipated event, threat, or danger. Leahy, Robert (2005). The Worry Cure: Seven Steps to Stop Worry from Stopping You. New York: Three Rivers Press. The Contrast Avoidance Model (CAM) postulates that individuals at risk for pathological worry and GAD symptoms uniquely fear emotional shifts from neutral or positive emotions into negative emotional states, and consequently use worry to maintain negative emotion in order to avoid shifts or blunt the effect of negative. Alireza Rashtbari & Omid Saed | Giulia Prete (Reviewing editor) (2020) Contrast avoidance model of worry and generalized anxiety disorder: A theoretical perspective, Cogent Psychology, 7:1. --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/xan0/message

In addition to the management techniques of breathing and cognitive restructuring I offer 4 therapeutic concepts to consider when coping with anxiety. They are (1) What in your life are you trying to avoid? (2) Anxiety can be paradoxical in that it signals the conditions are sufficient for you to begin to heal, (3) Anxiety is a natural part of growth and development, (4) Learn to respond to anxiety and accept that you can not control when it comes. --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/xan0/message

This episode introduces Stephanie S. Covington's grounding and meditative exercise called Palms Down, Palms Up. Covington, Stephanie A Woman's Way through the Twelve Steps Workbook. --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/xan0/message

Comparing and contrasting strategies that address cognitions in the treatment of anxiety. --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/xan0/message

This episode talks about the purpose of anxiety, nervousness, and fear. Anxiety is a precursor to growth and change. --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/xan0/message

This episode briefly explores Peter A. Levine's self-holding exercises. He is known for his emphasis on self-regulation during the treatment of trauma. Peter A. Levine, PH.D. is the originator and developer of Somatic Experiencing and the Director of the Somatic Experiencing Trauma Institute. He has also worked for NASA as a stress consultant while the Space Shuttle program was being developed. He is the author of the best selling book Waking the Tiger - Healing Trauma. https://www.somaticexperiencing.com/ https://www.ptsd.va.gov/apps/decisionaid/compare.aspx --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/xan0/message

In this interview I talk with a EMDRIA thoroughly trained clinician in EMDR--Eye Movement Desensitization Reprocessing therapy. Rebel talks about this therapy that utilizes bi-lateral stimulation or side-to side eye movements to reprocess disturbing memories or significant events in one's life, that continue to affect them today. https://www.emdria.org/find-a-therapist/ Miller, Carol E. Every Moment of a Fall: A Memoir of Recovery Through EMDR Therapy Rebel Gustafson, LICSW Innovative Psychological Consultants, LLC 763-416-4167 --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/xan0/message

How can we take what we know from science and utilize this to help us heal. In this episode, I will talk about discoveries made in research of the brain and trauma. It gives some explanations for why people who have suffered from devastating events have the misfortune to have to relive them by having flashbacks. It is part one of a three part series on trauma. Bessel, A Van der Kolk .The Body Keeps the Score: Memory and the Evolving Psychobiology of Posttraumatic Stress: January 1994 Harvard Review of Psychiatry 1(5) 253-65. Rothschild, Babette. The Body Remembers: The Psychophysiology of Trauma and Trauma Treatment. (2017). Norton & Company. https://www.nicabm.com/free-resources/ --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/xan0/message

Today we are discussing Imago Relationship Therapy with a special guest who is an experienced Imago therapist Carol L. Hornbeck, she is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist. Carol is licensed in Minnesota and Indiana. She works with couples, families, children and adolescents on a range of relationship issues, anxiety, depression, grief and loss, LGBTQ, and adoption. Prior to beginning her clinical work, she was a consultant and educator in child advocacy, abuse prevention and response, and professional ethics. https://www.hornbecklmft.com/ --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/xan0/message

This is an brief introduction to some of the concepts found in Imago Relationship Therapy, which was founded by Dr. Harville Hendrix and Dr. Helen LaKelly Hunt. This episode is a precursor to my interview in upcoming episode with a certified Imago therapist. H. Hendrix & H. Hunt (2017). The Space Between: The point of connection. Clovercroft Publishing. H. Hendrix & H.L., Hunt (1988). Getting the Love You Want: A guide for couples. T. Martin's Griffin: New York. --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/xan0/message

This episode highlights why we become stressed during pandemics and what we can do about it. --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/xan0/message

Caring for yourselves involves what I call the 4 Rs. Record, Re-new, Reorient, and Recognize. --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/xan0/message