Who You Needed

One Take Tuesdays are 5-minute/one take/unedited voice tracks...a challenge to undo perfectionist tendencies in the creative journey - the goal is to loosen up & enjoy process over destination

To stay connected, here are some helpful links:Whoyouneeded.comHelen's Instagram

Helen introduces Season 3 : the theme, One-Take Tuesday's, and fun content to come!

The truth is, methods and strategy can only take you so far. We can have the best strategy, but if our heart and mind is not 100% in the work, you can never reach a place of fulfillment. Clarity in vision —> longevity in practice more effective as time passes It's the ecosystem that surrounds us that pumps energy into our creative hearts - what do you value in your life & how do you achiever balance I want to leave you with the conviction and inspiration to be yourself. And let me be clear, not the social media you, the person you think you should be, or the person you know will get you the approval of your parents or friends. The vulnerable, icky, messy, beautiful, complicated you that has always been there. Maybe you started listening to this show because it's peaceful, but I hope you continue to listen because it challenges you to seek authenticity and humble conviction to be you.

Embedded in the quilt of creative individuality is a healthy level of doubt, anxiousness, and second-guessing. In this episode, Helen discusses the changing tide of being tired, of being tired. She provides 3 principles of taking action and using the anxiety we feel to channel our creative potential. Any feedback? Send Helen an email: helen@whoyouneeded.com As always, so much gratitude and love for you!

Helen interviews Edith, her grandma and asks her about life, joy, peace, and enduring trials in life.

Life is more fun when there is permission to mess up & grow from it.

What is the relationship between emotion and perseverance? How do you develop a kind relationship with your mind and body? In this episode, I reluctantly share and address my personal fears and path to wellness and how it helped unlock new ways of looking at my creative practice. We're going to go to uncharted territory, into the depths of physical challenges - a story about the physical feats of running and racing and how this practice can connect us to greater reaches of creativity. Often, creativity is experienced as a cerebral exercise, one in which we roam and pour out things in our brains. But, the theme of this season is to challenge ourselves to look beyond, into our surroundings, and thru interactions that may seem unfamiliar to find our true north: purpose. The pandemic put me in a state of introspective isolation, one in which made me ask myself hard questions related to happiness and joy. More than this, I started asking myself whether I was really reaching my fullest potential. The answer was an obvious no…

a chat about the challenge of creative development, how time is an accumulation of moments, and seeing creativity like an athlete. Learn how to reinvent internalized discouragement and channel it into progress.

A hidden look behind WYN stories: How Coldplay's Yellow inspired Helen's stories on presence, unpacking the questions that bring the stories to life, and asking what is essential to ponder about (what we fill our space with). Want to say hi :)? Send Helen an email: whoyouneededpod@gmail.com

An episode about acknowledging our anxiety, eliminating hurry, with a sprinkle of humor.

What's necessary to be happy? Less computers, more outdoors with loved ones.

A song about embracing the scars. Written and Performed by my sister, Marielle Garcia. All rights Reserved.

Short Stories that blend creativity and presence. Written and Produced by Helen Grace - a way of thinking, being, and process. This is a bi-weekly conversation: sometimes chuckle-worthy. Always encouraging. The goal is to help you feel good & inspired!

A short conversation on seeking what you're really seeking - How a conversation about lizards energized Helen to have some fun!

A short narrative about a Grandma & Granddaughter who explore the duality of life/death thru the avenue of gardening

Episode Summary Giggles are birthed out of two things: overcoming challenges & loving it.LinksInstagram: @thehelengraceWho You Needed WebsiteFeedback? Send us an email - whoyouneededpod@gmail.comWant to Read instead? >> Full TranscriptPodDecks.com : -->>>>"helen" for 10% your order

Special song to help evoke wonder - Written by my sister, Marielle Garcia :)

Episode Summary Creativity is the art of sensitivityRelationships & Song - greater avenues to visionNew Segment: Space to Wonder - Interviews w/ Creatives Monthly!LinksInstagram: @thehelengraceWho You Needed WebsiteFeedback? Send us an email - whoyouneededpod@gmail.comWant to Read instead? >> Full TranscriptPodDecks.com : -->>>>"helen" for 10% your order

Episode Summary Give your creativity some air. Walk away when stress accumulates (You wanna love it, not hate it).Pursue an avenue you never pursued before (for me, it was vintage eyewear)Beware when you encounter cynicism about & within yourself - that is when it's time to re-think your art.LinksInstagram: @thehelengraceWho You Needed Website

is it true that you enjoy it for the hobby itself? Or, is there something underneath the enjoyment that makes the craving palpable? Helen discusses the truth behind our purpose & why it's important to keep it close.

365 days ago - I started doing creative things.... the best decision of my life. Here's what I learned!

Life. Is. Noisy. But, what can we do about it? Helen challenges herself and the WYN community to go beyond the chant of 'busy culture' & lean into their path. Busy delays. Busy hastens. Busy attempts to forget what it is that we are meant to do. Busy follows culture. Not-busy brings about perspective. Not busy transforms culture.

Do you find yourself empty? The life of a creative person is messy, it's filled with highs/lows of inspiration and none at all. Helen tells a short story about Brekov, a man who is searching for meaning again after losing it to ego and accolades.

Mistakes aren't a take-it-or-leave it narrative. Or, they don't have to be. We lose everyday, when we fiddle with our keys underneath our backpack. The turn we forget to make. Mistakes are good subtractions. A famous beginning...

In our frequent attempts to connect with people, we can fail to understand the relationship with ourselves. Beyond liking yourself, it's important to understand yourself. The care that you put into fostering your self-identity and choosing process over ego. P.s. Prefer to read? Full Transcript here (https://www.whoyouneeded.com/all-you-need-is-a-spark-a-lesson-from-my-next-door-neighbor/)

Reframe what it means to be an outcast - Helen shares personal insights and short stories about what it means to have a mind that may feel like it's from "another world".

art dies in second guessing. don't get warped into being someone you're not, that's exhausting

The world is noisy! Full of "should" and "should not" ... but our perception doesn't have to be. Helen discusses taking a social media break and finding inspiration in everyday adventures. 

People want us to quit because we're so close. The paralyzing fear of "not enough" has the potential to cripple our dreams. Helen encourages us to channel our nervous energy for good.  Episode Summary 1. [00:01:03] How can fear possibly make me better? 2. [00:02:50] Internal vs. External Motivation to Keep Going 3. [00:04:43] Dig deep inside – what do you want? 4. [00:06:21] Helen introduces the end of an era and exciting news about Season 2 of Who You Needed  

"I see a lot of people that start things and quit. They quit because it was too hard. The only reason they failed wasn't that they weren't smart, talented, or educated. It's our persistence and determination that gives us endless potential"  Episode Summary [00:01:24] Helen pitches a theory to Adam: how his various past lives as a ‘fighting kid', musician, and Mormon missionary provide him with the creativity and planning to carry into business [00:09:07] Adam vulnerably unpacks how his unconventional upbringing (part of his childhood raised in a polygamist ranch) influenced his parenting [00:14:08] Adam talks about turning his health around – how he lost 50 lbs after a tough-love conversation with an important person in his life [00:22:54] On Over-working Yourself: “some of it was a lie that I would tell myself, ‘I'm working for the kids so that they can have a life. But I realized later on that I was really truly doing it just for me, just because it was my escape and the thing that I could control.” [00:24:28] How Working LESS made Adam perform better in business [00:27:26] Helen notices a trend with Adam: why does he love pushing limits? So, Adam unpacks the sixth-grade turn-around. [00:32:36] How music transformed Adam – ‘it gave me a breath' [00:34:55] Helen and Adam talk Podcast Strategy: What do you need to SUCCEED? [00:44:40] Rapid-fire questions Resources Mentioned Get in Touch with Adam - GrowYourShow.com Book: Atomic Habits by James Clear  Special Offers Thanks to Pod Decks, our listeners can get 10% off their first purchase  (use code: HELENDECKS)

"Our minds are incredibly adaptable. We can make it do anything! But, overthinking creates patterns of thought that lead to entanglement." Helen provides funny and practical examples of how to curb our vortex of overthinking Episode Summary [00:00:00] The Toothbrush in the Toilet Analogy – Helen draws this analogy to describe the destruction that is overthinking [00:02:32] Overthinking + Vortex = a consistent energy mass of a behemoth when we apply a habit of analytical thinking and problem solving to a situation that is unhelpful or unproductive. [00:04:06] How to shift our focus: on the limitless capacity of the present moment Resources Mentioned (affiliate links) Power of Habit by Charles Duhigg The Obstacle is the Way by Ryan Holiday Think Like a Monk by Jay Shetty Special Offers Thanks to Pod Decks, our listeners can get 10% off their first purchase  (use code: HELENDECKS)

There are days when we feel motivated and days we feel un-motivated. Helen discusses the first step to unlock sustained productivity over a long period of time.  __________________________________________ [00:00:00] Helen on how the Oversaturation of Knowledge can Zap our creative mind and self-dialogue [00:02:56] Introducing Gary Keller's Concept of “Counter Balance” – reaching a place of deep work by placing focus on one task to propel quality work 3.     [00:04:57] Setting ONE radical intention a day Resources & Links Books that keep us in radical intention (Amazon Affiliate Links) 1 One Thing by Gary Keller - Tired of being stretched too thin? This book provides practical stories and examples of getting back to the basics 2. Deep Work by Cal Newport – Understand the power of technology in distracting us from doing deep work – this book unpacks how to set limits for technology & unlock your potential as a creative Special Offers Thanks to Pod Decks, our listeners can get 10% off their first purchase  (use code: HELENDECKS)  

Distraction is sticky because it's a shiny object. Learn about getting un-stuck. __________________________________________ Episode Summary [00:00:49] Purchasing "more" items will not make us better. It's a weird dilemma to go through because the more things that you purchase, you realized the less that you need [00:02:33] Talk and create from a place of abundance and not lack. We don't have to sound impressive.  [00:02:57] Grounding our feet in the present moment Sometimes less is more.  Resources & Links Books that keep us in radical intention (Amazon Affiliate Links) 1 One Thing by Gary Keller - Tired of being stretched too thin? This book provides practical stories and examples of getting back to the basics 2. Untethered Souls By Michael Singer – Get Clear on Identity thru self-awareness. Singer unpacks the beauty of letting go through a releasing practice Special Offers Thanks to Pod Decks, our listeners can get 10% off their first purchase  (use code: HELENDECKS)    

Many people love to talk, but effective people love to listen.  Seek first to understand the question beneath the question. This episode is Powered by Pod Decks , with unique interview questions and episode starting prompts in the palm of your hand. Use code HELENDECKS for 10% off your first order! Transcript: (Full Show Notes at WhoYouNeeded.com) [00:00:00] We battle with this thought every single day. Am I impressive enough? Are people going to like me? Here's one unimpressive trick to stand out from the crowd, take care of yourself mentally, and still be an effective leader. [00:01:50] As an introvert, I realized that when I enter into a new setting, there are a lot of people who have something to say, but very few people listen to what is being said. What do I mean by that?... When you enter a room, oftentimes one person will ask a question, but there are layers to questions. [00:02:14] There are hidden patterns that are embedded inside a question, but oftentimes. People seek to answer before they seek to listen. And my friend Patrick has a saying that listen and silent are spelled with the same letters. And oftentimes the most unimpressive trick to standing out from a crowd is to listen. [00:02:35] Yeah, Not as impressive as you thought. Huh? That's exactly the point of this title. Oftentimes maintaining our energy and maintaining our mental sustenance and value in a room comes from listening. It comes from not seeking to go after the attention it's to go after the value and heart of other people. [00:02:58] Oftentimes when we think about someone who creates value and inclusivity and open space in a room, they think about someone who can carry a conversation. They think about someone who is charismatic and charming, but often underneath that is the desire to understand. It's the desire to seek first, to get to the heart of a human being before even opening their mouth to answer or providing advice. [00:03:25] There's the question beneath the question. After interacting with several people on clubhouse on Instagram and networking with different podcasters, I realized that so many of us have gotten good at talking. We know exactly what to say. We know the rules. 00:03:48] And so how do you get to the heart of a human being? There are different ways to listen. There are different ways to connect. Someone could ask you, for example, how, how do you make X, Y, and Z amount of money? Well, what type of business do you have? What type of community do you seek to garner? Who is your target audience? [00:04:11] I began to ask those questions before even saying anything. Listening comes with identifying other people's strengths and how they can benefit in the room. My pastor, when I was in high school, used to tell me that the star of any room is not the person who says. Hey, here I am. It's the person who says, Hey, there you are a great leader, an effective leader. [00:04:33] Sometimes the most prominent spiritual teachers are ones that identified the strength, energy, and humanity in people's souls before they even opened their mouths and bragging about themselves. Let other people brag about you, but make it a point to see the gold in other people because the world needs that we're hurting right now. [00:04:53] There's an economic instability going on in America. There are people who have lost their jobs. There are people who are looking to hope and there are people who are looking to dream. And so one of the key tricks to standing out in the crowd now is to actually care, is to actually listen. And that's it. [00:05:10] That's today's episode. If you love these bite-sized episodes, share with a friend, send this to someone who this could help and uplift. Episodes are now coming out three times a week for you. I plan on posting on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays in the hopes that this could help someone in need. So for all you fellow misfit creatives out there, keep creating, keep going. [00:05:37] This is Helen from whoyouneeded.com signing out, have a gorgeous rest of your day. Talk to you soon.  

Helen vulnerably discusses the importance of rest, why she's stopping the 100-day challenge for the sake of her mental health, and meditation practice.  Products/Books Mentioned (Afilliate Links) Think Like a Monk  Show Notes *Full transcript can be found at WhoYouNeeded.com [00:00:00]  Welcome back. My name is Helen from "WhoYouNeeded.Com" and today's episode is about mindset. It's about resetting when you feel tired and not yourself lately. I know that with the year Mark coming to a close with the global pandemic, some of us can feel down. We can feel discouraged about the progress or lack thereof that's being made. [00:00:23] So I really want today's episode to feel a little bit. Relaxing and a bit of a cleanse from the rest of the news that you might be reading about the state of the world. So, sit back, relax, drink your afternoon tea or coffee. Maybe you're listening to this in the morning and just rest with me for a little bit. [00:00:43] I just posted something a few minutes ago about rest, how important it was to just reset, to not move at the pace that everyone else expects you to be moving in. But to just take a deep breath, wake up. Take some time to yourself and think about what I really need right now with everything that's going on. [00:01:03] Sometimes I forget to meditate to really take a pause. And there's the digital space. There is the need to Oprah overproduce and to overwork yourself because you are working from home. And a lot of us haven't been taught those boundaries of when do I shut it off? When do I stop? And I'm here to tell you that I'm learning this too. [00:01:26] There's so much information out there that now that my phone is available at my fingertips at 24 hours a day, seven days a week, it's hard to not be consumed by online media and by the surmounting pressures of being perfect during a pandemic. It's actually something I wanted to talk to you about today. [00:01:48] The last few days I just haven't been doing so well mentally. That sends me to say that I have to stop me a hundred days of podcasts and it breaks my heart because I realized that content creation is such a personal endeavor that I wouldn't be doing my audience, a genuine service if I just posted something just for the clout of it. [00:02:10] And who you needed is very anti clout or not about the reputation we're about serving with meaning and because who you needed is such a vulnerable podcast. To go there every single day would just seem inauthentic because I'm just not my best every day. And you, as my audience deserve the very best, this is starting to sound like a breakup, but I'm not quitting who you needed. [00:02:35] I'm just being better about my time and notice that I'm in a pattern of overworking myself. And it's something that I'm mentally learning to work through that I don't need to perform so much in order to get. The approval that I want for myself and for the sake of my own mental health and just for the service that I want to provide for this podcast, I am going to take most of the week off instead of posting an episode every single day with working, part-time going to grad school, trying to write a dissertation, just trying to keep my head above water. [00:03:09] I realized that a hundred days of podcasts just. Would be a loss in both areas. And I want to keep doing podcasts long-term these hundred days, or these last 25 days have really taught me about audio production, about content creation, about content planning and how to be very intentional about how I show up to spaces that I never want to turn on a mic because I have to, I want to create from a place of love and authenticity, and I will still post episodes two, three times a week. [00:03:42] This has taught me a lot. I think taking on a big challenge in the midst of chaos was definitely a challenge. And so, thank you for letting me be honest with you and for allowing me to fail because. Wow. I wouldn't have been okay with this a year ago. I would've kept going and just burnt myself out, but we want to be able to prevent burnout. [00:04:08] And so that means catching the areas in your life where you feel like you aren't being healthy early. It took some time to think about what it was that was going on. And, and I sat there, and I thought about. What's really in my heart right now. What's something that our community is going through. And with every conversation that I've had, I'm sensing this general pattern of just tired. [00:04:33] I'm so tired of going on zoom and having to pretend like everything is okay. I'm tired of not having a genuine conversation or I'm not thinking about the state of the world. I really just want to engage in genuine conversation. And so, I wanted to hold that space for people who might just, just want that our days are still long, our work hasn't stopped, but we don't have the privilege of going inside our cars and driving and listening to music anymore. [00:05:06] We're stuck at home. And so, what are some things that we can do to really reset? I would tell you to not go on the television to not. Mindlessly scroll through clubhouse or Instagram or Twitter or YouTube, but to really sit with your breath sometimes meditate and unravel the sense of inadequacy or discomfort. [00:05:36] But those actually feel that we carry throughout the day that we're unwilling to confront. Granted, we do carry some residual effects from being around people in our workplace. We can't ignore that as well. And so, throughout the day we carry these pieces of our lives and other people's lives based on who we interact with via zoom or in-person if you work in an in-person environment. [00:06:04] And that's one of the reasons why it's so essential to pause. And so, it's mindful to be aware of the pause of the things that we do in our body that may be signaling that we're not okay. And that's all right as well. There's so much going on beyond us, that there are days where we feel the weight of it all. [00:06:30] It's tough. It's getting to that point of the year where it's gotten really tough. And personally, I find it hard to get up in the morning and the fatigue is real and I've really had to sit back and ask myself, what do I need? I always circle back to the title of this podcast, because I didn't even know what I needed when I started this. [00:06:55] And the more that I practice, the more that I realize that we're never going to stop needing something, that there is a relationship that we create to the world that isn't transactional. It's actually communal we have a relationship. To this earth. And sometimes the feelings that we have are signals. As I said earlier that we might need a conversation, or we might need a hug or just a moment of pause. [00:07:29] And I hope this episode was that for you, if you like episodes like these, go ahead and go to "WhoYouNeeded.com" for resources like episodes such as these that are very vulnerable, and peace-centered are on the website. But until then, this is Helen from who you needed, and I will see you next Wednesday. [00:07:51] Thank you so much for listening. I appreciate all of your support and for allowing me to be honest today, I'll see you later.

Transcript [00:00:00] Hi everyone. This is Helen from "who you needed" and before I begin my episode on "Raw Outtakes, ways that we can improve at who you needed. I wanted to take the time to start out kind of fun, kind of light with an Amazon purchase update. So with the $50 Amazon gift card I got from podcasts, it's going on right now... [00:00:20] I got a book called "One Thing" by Gary Keller.  I can't stop talking about this book because it's  given me a lot of perspective about focus.  This is going to lead straight into today's episode about not thinking too much about focusing on everything that you focus on nothing. This  book talks about how, when we set one intentional goal for our lives, we can set ourselves free with time. [00:00:48] Lately I feel like I've just been so lagging behind when it comes to this because I've made everything. a priority that nothing has become important  that's what this episode is about.  I don't know how this is happening, but  the books that I'm reading are really helping me shape ways that I can improve in my podcast practice.  That's one of piece of advice I've always gotten is that the more that you read, the more that you stay informed, the better that you get as a content creator. And I'm finally realizing why. [00:01:17] Now, back to the episode, here's the who you needed. Soundtrack. [00:01:45] Something crossed my mind this morning: what was I thinking, when I dedicated a hundred days of podcasting to these next few months? [00:01:54] There are three things that I've learned from doing this challenge. One, it's very important to stay organized, to plan content ahead of time. Two: I really should think about the consequences of my actions when I promise something *laughs*. [00:02:11] And three: I really  like to challenge myself (laughter).  I have never felt more gratification, more of a challenge, more of a push and an improvement in my performance in doing the same thing every single day. I know that every day I have to put something out. And this is a raw recording of me doing this real time of the mental struggle and the push that you go through when you're creating daily content. [00:02:36] And it's really made me think about my mental health and how I organize my time. I realized that time is a precious commodity for a lot of people. Sometimes we don't realize how much of a privilege it is. And in doing a hundred days of podcasts, it's really made me think about my priorities. Where I spend my time and how I get better manage my time. [00:02:57] And one of the things I realized in the best way, and then the most loving way towards myself is that I need to improve in my time management, knowing that I have to publish content every single day means that I have to be very structured with how I manage my time. And late nights, aren't going to cut it anymore because you're, my audience is because we've built such a relationship. [00:03:19] I feel like I trust you enough to say that I want to be better in the way that I produce my episodes. I really want to bring value to every space that I walk into. And that means bringing the energy, bringing the joy. And that means I need to show up recharged, prepared, and organized for every episode that I have. [00:03:39] And this is not be being hard on myself. It's me setting a higher and healthier expectation for me to live up to this challenge. Because at the end of the day, I don't want to resent me taking on a hundred days. I want to feel better for it. And that means confronting my weakness, because if I'm not acknowledging my weakness, I won't be able to acknowledge what I do. [00:04:00] I want to thank you for watching my gradual improvement in podcast production. I started out my podcast with an iPhone and then a cheap recorder. Then I moved up to a USB microphone. Now, I feel like I'm still getting comfortable in this craft. We've gotten to build this together. You and I, if you've been listening for a while, thank you. [00:04:26] Thank you so much for your support. Thank you for sticking with me. I show up more and more wanting to be better wanting to improve at higher rates because I have people like you who constantly see the best in me. And it makes me want to be better. It's being able to acknowledge what you do and don't do well. [00:04:47] And because I've seen. The who you needed. Podcasts increase in listenership a lot. In the last few days, I wanted to provide a raw uncut solo episode about how I can better show up for you, always seeking to improve, always seeking to do better. I'll see you tomorrow.

Show Notes [00:01:47] Balancing multiple things at one time. Helen asks Tom: How do you manage all of those passion projects and having a full-time job too? [00:02:08] When you do everything you're ‘supposed' to and you are still unhappy  “I was lost. I did everything I was supposed to. I chased, I was well paid. I had titles, all this stuff and I have an amazing wife and three amazing daughters and I felt dead inside. And there, I believe there are a lot more people that are that way. They just don't know it, or they're afraid they don't know who to talk to about it.” [00:04:33] Am I living in everyone else's expectations? [00:07:05] Authors as Your Chosen Mentors – Our Desire to Grow is a Gradual, Learning Process [00:13:03] The Process of Getting Comfortable with the Hard Questions [00:15:29] The process of accepting your past, embracing Self-Forgiveness: “I have to shed that because I can't move forward.” [00:22:20] The Art of Focus: Our minds focus on THOUSANDS of things a day [00:25:54] Finding Release from Unnecessary Stressors [00:30:15] Importance of Spiritual Practices [00:32:07] Escaping from our “hamster wheel of torture  [00:34:32] Boundaries in Media Consumption [00:42:03]-  [00:44:59] Tom Shares a Story of His Daughter: On Perceived Failure + Perspective [00:48:26] Healing from Hard Circumstances:  “awaken and be at peace and ease”.  [00:55:36] Shutting Off our “Monkey Minds”

Develop a healthy relationship to fear. Can fear be a healthy driver of our lives? Listen to find out more! Full Episode Transcript (With References on WhoYouNeeded.com) [00:00:00] *Who You Needed Soundtrack* The theme of this week is “life's biggest questions”. Today I asked myself: What are you really afraid of? I unpack why I'm afraid of publishing episodes every day and my thought process and publishing it and the vulnerability of it all. [00:00:46] Starting my new segment called Helen's latest Amazon purchases. If there's something that you should know about me, you should know that I love books. I love learning. I love growing and I just love cultivating a good heart culture, which means that I want my inner world to really flourish. I've purchased is “The One Thing by Gary Keller”. It's a book about focus and I've only gotten a few pages in the number. One thing I'm learning is that sometimes when we fail to realize our life's mission, everything becomes important. [00:01:31] So make the main thing, the main thing just as a nerd geeking out moment, I didn't realize how this topic of talking about the books that I'm reading really fed into our conversation about fear. Because it does…a lot of people get this wrong. A lot of people think that not focusing on the fear actually makes us braver, but it's the focus on the fear that actually makes us better. [00:02:00] Let me tell you why there's a book that was written by Jay Shetty called Think Like a Monk. This concept really changed the way that I viewed my fear. In the second chapter of his book, he talks about really sitting with the root of the fear and cultivating a kind relationship to his fear because when we suppress the fear, we subconsciously manifest the future that we're afraid of because we're unwilling to face life's biggest questions. [00:02:29] What are you really afraid of? And that chapter that he wrote on fear profoundly affected me in the most positive way. Because I really dug deep, especially when it comes to this a hundred days of podcast challenge, what am I really afraid of? And in the beginning, I thought not scared of anything. I'm doing this a hundred days of podcasts on my own, but if I'm being vulnerable with you today, which is the whole center crux of this podcast, I have to admit that I was afraid of failure, but an underneath that fear of failure was. [00:03:00] The fear of not being enough and underneath that was being taken back to memories of rejection and feeling like I wasn't enough for me that I could never be enough. And if I didn't. Come to the realization. I wouldn't be speaking with you about it today. I want to give you another analogy on mindfulness and I'll put the links to these resources in the bio as well of the book and the video that I'm about to mention. [00:03:26] But there's this amazing video that I saw. There are these two wolves in our lives. There's the good Wolf, which are our good characteristics. And then there is our anger in our hatred. When we fight with the Bad Wolf. It only makes the bad Wolf bigger, but when we seek to listen and understand the dark shadows of ourselves, we tame our dark shadows and life's biggest questions are ultimately developing a healthy relationship with our darkness. [00:03:54] If anything, fear is a signal. That something is beyond our limits. So, to start developing a better relationship of it, when I was younger, I used to think that anger was a horrible emotion and shouldn't be expressed based on my own life experiences. And then I realized that sometimes there are healthy ways of reacting to anger. [00:04:14] That conflict can also be a healthy way of growing a relationship and communicating honestly with another human being. And I hope this helps you in some way today of serving and cultivating a deeper relationship with their dark shadows. I'm going to be unpacking this concept more in later episodes. [00:04:31] The purpose of this week is really asking those really hard questions. And I'm publishing an episode in a few days with my friend Tom corner, who overcame self-harm and self-hatred and how he got there. And it's ultimately a gradual process. I also spoke to my good friend, Greg Bornstein, who is the host of the open loops podcast. [00:04:54] And he explores hypnotism with me and a cool concept. I haven't heard before called gorilla ontology. He's also into paranormal activity and whether or not he believes that kind of stuff. So, I'm going to be unpacking a lot of very interesting topics within the next few days. And I hope you join me. [00:05:11] Can't wait to talk to you soon. Another day. Another podcast. See you tomorrow.

"it's SO fun getting to fail because you realize that there's no expectation to be perfect...when you subject yourself to failure over and over, you ultimately get better (if you're willing to self-reflect and learn from those failures). Sometimes I use myself as an experiment of how much can I actually get done?" Episode Notes [00:00:00] Reflecting on deep rest, why it's necessary [00:03:10] "there are plaguing thoughts that come across our minds every day of how much we need to get done. The number of things that are on our to-do lists, the bills that we have to pay, the surmounting debts, the projects that we want to accomplish, the lack of time throughout the day.... And it's also overwhelming." [00:03:30] Unpacking Un-Rest, Getting Back to Rest [00:03:49] Anti-Productivity, Pro-Meaning [00:04:52] 21-Day Reflection: What I've learned from the 100-day Podcast Challenge [00:05:36] New Segment: Nerdy Amazon Purchases  [00:06:54] if you want free tickets to Podfest Global, you can use the code: "WYNCLUB" to receive a free ticket on me. I want you to be there! If you register for Podfest global, you get registered as a possible Guinness Book of World Records holder for the largest virtual  online event [00:07:18] I want you to be there. It starts Monday, March one to March 5th, 2021. And that is it. Thank you so much for taking the time to listen to this podcast. My name is Helen from who you need a.com to subscribe. You can go to the who you needed. Dot com website. There are links to Apple, Spotify, and Google podcasts.    

"When you put yourself in the arena, there's so much doubt that comes out...But there's beauty in that too. One day, you're going to look back and you're going to tell a story about the brave moment that you took..."

"change ultimately starts with us, that when we put ourselves in these situations of bravery and vulnerability and act from a place of honesty, it has the capacity of creating rivers of change with other people."

“When you seek to bring value to a space, it's not just about being impressive or having something profound or smart to say...it's speaking directly to someone that might need it.” Show Notes [00:00:00] The Universal Need to Belong [00:00:58] “Most of us share this thought that I don't want to look stupid when I go [present something], I don't want to act or seem like I am the only one who doesn't know what they're talking about.” [00:03:20] “I don't really believe that there's any original ideas. I believe that there's something called self-awareness and reading a room that.”  

Wow, I'm blown away by your support. Thank you, I'm so grateful for this community. It's an honor to serve you. 

“They say, think outside of the box. Well, you can't think outside of the box, if you don't have a box to work from, so that box is your journals.” Show Notes  [00:00:00] Introduction – Reflecting on 50 episodes   [00:00:29] 15 days of consistent daily podcasting. [00:04:07] How did you build such a human transparent relationship with your family? [00:04:47] Derrick: “My wife and I try to develop this rhythm of apologizing when necessary so that they understand that it's okay. You know, to apologize when you have to”  [00:06:33] Family Takes Work [00:07:20] How do you get into the creative process? [00:11:01] Refresh Your Creativity: “They say, think outside of the box. Well, you can't think outside of the box, if you don't have a box to work from, so that box is your journals.” [00:12:51] Rhythm of Your Life: “go to a different space and put yourself in a mode of inspiration is necessary. If you're going to do creative work as humans, we're built to connect, we're built to be in touch with where we are.” [00:14:16] Derrick On Work and Boundaries – “I need to guard Friday and Saturdays.”  

"I began to realize that.  God created me as well as everyone else uniquely. And I think it was a mentor of mine who once said, the world needs you to be you, the world needs Derrick, not a carbon copy of someone else." Show Notes [00:00:00] Welcome + Introduce Derrick [00:01:54] What's your relationship like to church? How did you grow up? What was religion like [00:01:58] Catholicism + Adoption of it by family orientation, I guess it was one of those relationships with the church that I would go to every Sunday. [00:04:13] Understanding Faith growing up and in college  [00:07:25] Introspection and Deep Awareness of Who You Are – unpacking Derrick'sunconventional' layers [00:08:10] Leadership: Understanding who you are NOT [00:09:25] Ministry with the homeless community--going with them to their mental health appointments, etc. [00:10:26] Boundaries: Learning to say, “No” - Both physical, mental and all of the above emotional, I had to learn to say no. [00:12:05] Mental Health in the Scriptures: Prophet, Elijah and depression [00:12:32]Derrick and Helen Vulnerably unpack depression and suicide [00:13:33] “Consumer- driven Christianity” [00:19:36] “To show others that I was busy, that I was doing something in life, but inside I was broken” [00:22:00] Derrick Discusses Navigating Spaces as an Asian American Pastor in evangelical ministry [00:24:56] Getting Over Barriers of Judgement   [00:26:39] Derrick On: Allowing His Kids to explore different avenues of creativity  [00:28:53] “God created me as well as everyone else uniquely. And I think it was a mentor of mine who once said, the world needs you to be you, the world needs Derrick, not a carbon copy of someone else.” [00:30:16] “And from a spiritual perspective, I believe that we all have a specific purpose and to not live it out would be really shortchanging, not just God, but shortchanging yourself. And that's something that has really resonated within me. And I try to instill into my book or even, back when I was teaching in the public school, teaching my students.”  

In a world of high-performance, I admit that I struggle to rest when I'm tired. This episode is about acknowledging these weary feelings.

Someone once told me, 'the life of a creative is taking a chance on yourself every day'. This episode is about overcoming the 'overwhelm', I realized that I had to look myself in the mirror every day and choose myself...over my fears (yikes). 

Struggling with imposter syndrome? I can relate. In this episode, I talk openly about the stories we tell ourselves and how our self-limiting beliefs might hinder our calling.  I was inspired to record this episode after a Clubhouse conversation with a panel of inspiring people: Tima Elhajj, Alex Carter, Heather Monahan, and Steve Wohlenhaus...where I asked them, "how do I step into my confidence?"

Humility Learning to Work with What We Have Service > Glamour 

Asian American hate crime has increased 1,900% in 2020 due to circumstances related to the COVID-19 pandemic. Unlike her other thoughts,  Helen vulnerably unpacks the "Model Minority Myth" and the effect this has on Asian American college students' mental health and well-being.