Therapy Works

In this episode, Emily and Julia tackle a heartfelt dilemma from a listener who relocated to the North of England to be closer to family, only to find themselves deeply unhappy. Together, they explore the hidden emotional impact of moving, from loss of familiarity and identity to questions of control, grief, and expectation. Emily and Julia share compassionate, practical reflections on adjusting to new places, allowing space for resentment and sadness, lowering the pressure to “love it,” and gently seeking out small moments of comfort and connection. A thoughtful, reassuring conversation for anyone struggling with change, homesickness, or the slow journey toward acceptance. If Only If create beautifully made nightwear that feels thoughtful, timeless, and deeply comforting at the end of the day. Their pieces are designed to support women through every stage of life and are made from natural fabrics in small batches. If you'd like to explore their collection, you can visit ifonlyif.co.uk and use the code JULIA15 for 15% off.  More from Therapy Works: Subscribe to the Therapy Works Substack for guidance on everyday struggles and access to Julia's monthly live webinar: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://juliasamuel.substack.com/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow Julia on Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@juliasamuelmbe⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ for tips, tools, and conversations about navigating life's challenges. If you enjoy this episode, please consider rating, reviewing, and subscribing — it makes a big difference and helps others discover these conversations.If you need help finding a therapist, visit: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠The Samuel Therapy Practice⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode of Therapy Works, I'm joined by Matthew Gulliford, who opens up about the loss of his beloved French bulldog, Mr. Carson. Matthew describes a kind of grief that completely blindsided him, visceral, physical, and all consuming, and we explore why pet loss can feel so intense when your animal is part of your daily rhythm, your home, and your sense of self.We talk about the parts people don't always say out loud, like the guilt, the loneliness, and the heaviness of having to make end of life decisions, as well as what actually helped Matthew survive the worst moments. From personal rituals and writing “messages” to Carson, to planting a tree, carrying his ashes, and eventually expanding love again with new puppies, this is a conversation that gives real permission to grieve deeply and without comparison. If Only If create beautifully made nightwear that feels thoughtful, timeless, and deeply comforting at the end of the day. Their pieces are designed to support women through every stage of life and are made from natural fabrics in small batches. If you'd like to explore their collection, you can visit ifonlyif.co.uk and use the code JULIA15 for 15% off.  More from Therapy Works: Subscribe to the Therapy Works Substack for guidance on everyday struggles and access to Julia's monthly live webinar: ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://juliasamuel.substack.com/⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow Julia on Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠@juliasamuelmbe⁠⁠⁠⁠ for tips, tools, and conversations about navigating life's challenges. If you enjoy this episode, please consider rating, reviewing, and subscribing — it makes a big difference and helps others discover these conversations.If you need help finding a therapist, visit: ⁠⁠⁠⁠The Samuel Therapy Practice⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this Agony Aunties episode, Julia, Emily and Sophie respond to a listener's thoughtful question about how to gently introduce the idea that movement can “move the mind” to the people who may resist it most: teenagers and elderly family members. They explore why forcing exercise can backfire (especially with teens), and instead recommend modelling movement, keeping encouragement low-key, and making activity feel incidental and social rather than a “lesson.” For older relatives, they discuss practical, confidence-building entry points like finding the right trainer, starting small with habit-stacking (tiny movements built into everyday routines), and using approachable online classes to reduce the barrier to entry. The takeaway is compassionate and relationship-led: focus on connection, meet people where they are, and when needed, share your concerns as care rather than control. If Only If create beautifully made nightwear that feels thoughtful, timeless, and deeply comforting at the end of the day. Their pieces are designed to support women through every stage of life and are made from natural fabrics in small batches. If you'd like to explore their collection, you can visit ifonlyif.co.uk and use the code JULIA15 for 15% off.  More from Therapy Works: Subscribe to the Therapy Works Substack for guidance on everyday struggles and access to Julia's monthly live webinar: ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://juliasamuel.substack.com/⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow Julia on Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠@juliasamuelmbe⁠⁠⁠⁠ for tips, tools, and conversations about navigating life's challenges. If you enjoy this episode, please consider rating, reviewing, and subscribing — it makes a big difference and helps others discover these conversations.If you need help finding a therapist, visit: ⁠⁠⁠⁠The Samuel Therapy Practice⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode of Therapy Works, I sit down with Cressida Bonas for a conversation that feels unusually intimate and quietly brave. We talk about the loss of her older sister Pandora and how saying the word “died” still lands with a kind of shock and finality. Cressida shares what she didn't expect about grief, the fear that lives in her body, the numb days that feel lonelier than tears, and the strange push pull of wanting to hold on while also wanting the suffering to end. We explore what it was like watching Pandora die in hospital, how her family tried to “be strong” and hide their tears until Pandora asked them not to, and why that shift towards honesty became a lesson in love and connection for all of them.We also talk about the way Cressida processes through creativity, writing a letter to Pandora in those final days and then finding herself unable to stop writing afterwards, not as memoir but through characters that could hold what felt unbearable. She reflects on motherhood, self doubt, and finding more confidence since having children, alongside the frustration of being put in a box by other people's assumptions. We end with what Pandora's death has clarified for her, the preciousness of ordinary moments, the desire to waste less time, and the meaning behind her podcast Lessons From Our Mothers, which grew out of recording her own mother's story and the wish to understand the women who made us. Listen to Cressida's Podcast, Lessons From Our Mothers: https://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/lessons-from-our-mothers/id1803569581 If Only If create beautifully made nightwear that feels thoughtful, timeless, and deeply comforting at the end of the day. Their pieces are designed to support women through every stage of life and are made from natural fabrics in small batches. If you'd like to explore their collection, you can visit ifonlyif.co.uk and use the code JULIA15 for 15% off.  More from Therapy Works: Subscribe to the Therapy Works Substack for guidance on everyday struggles and access to Julia's monthly live webinar: ⁠⁠⁠https://juliasamuel.substack.com/⁠⁠⁠ Follow Julia on Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠@juliasamuelmbe⁠⁠⁠ for tips, tools, and conversations about navigating life's challenges. If you enjoy this episode, please consider rating, reviewing, and subscribing — it makes a big difference and helps others discover these conversations.If you need help finding a therapist, visit: ⁠⁠⁠The Samuel Therapy Practice⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this Agony Aunties episode, Emily and Sophie take the reins while Julia continues her recovery, diving into a thoughtful listener question about accepting children with SEN and learning difficulties as academic parents. Together they explore the often unspoken grief that can arise when parenting looks different from what we imagined, the importance of making space for complex emotions without guilt, and the delicate balance between acceptance and adjustment. The conversation gently unpacks parental expectations, fear of judgment, and how compassion for both yourself and your child can shift the experience, while highlighting the value of support networks, school partnerships, and recognising that a meaningful, fulfilling life is not defined by academic success alone. • Email your questions: jsamuelpod@gmail.com • DM Julia on Instagram: @juliasamuelmbe If Only If create beautifully made nightwear that feels thoughtful, timeless, and deeply comforting at the end of the day. Their pieces are designed to support women through every stage of life and are made from natural fabrics in small batches. If you'd like to explore their collection, you can visit ifonlyif.co.uk and use the code JULIA15 for 15% off.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this week's episode of Therapy Works, I'm joined by Charlotte Bellamy, who speaks with extraordinary openness about the death of her son Finn, who was stillborn at 28 weeks. Charlotte takes us through the shock of reduced movements, the devastating moment she was told “there's no heartbeat”, and the surreal reality that even in loss, you still have to give birth. We talk about the grief of missing the baby you'd imagined, alongside the trauma of what happens medically and physically, and Charlotte shares how her sister, a midwife, supported her and her husband Milo through those first unbearable days and helped them create precious memories with Finn. We also explore how Charlotte and Milo grieved differently, why therapy and understanding the body's response to grief helped, and how fear can shape everything that comes after. Charlotte describes the marathon of pregnancy after loss and the practical ways she protected herself, from having someone with her at scans to telling staff upfront what she needed. At the end, Sophie and Emily join me to reflect on the importance of support, naming, and speaking about the baby who has died, because using Finn's name and remembering him isn't “bringing it up”, it's honouring a life that mattered.If Only If create beautifully made nightwear that feels thoughtful, timeless, and deeply comforting at the end of the day. Their pieces are designed to support women through every stage of life and are made from natural fabrics in small batches. If you'd like to explore their collection, you can visit ifonlyif.co.uk and use the code JULIA15 for 15% off.  More from Therapy Works: Subscribe to the Therapy Works Substack for guidance on everyday struggles and access to Julia's monthly live webinar: ⁠⁠https://juliasamuel.substack.com/⁠⁠ Follow Julia on Instagram: ⁠⁠@juliasamuelmbe⁠⁠ for tips, tools, and conversations about navigating life's challenges. If you enjoy this episode, please consider rating, reviewing, and subscribing — it makes a big difference and helps others discover these conversations.If you need help finding a therapist, visit: ⁠⁠The Samuel Therapy Practice⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this Agony Aunties episode, Sophie and Emily return to answer a deeply thoughtful listener question about feeling second best to a partner's late spouse. Together, they reflect on communication within relationships, the role of the inner critic, and how comparison often reveals the stories we tell ourselves rather than the truth of how we are seen. The conversation offers gentle reframes, practical ways to step out of self-punishing thought loops, and reassurance that entering a family touched by grief isn't about replacement but about bringing your own, distinct presence into the system. • Email your questions: jsamuelpod@gmail.com • DM Julia on Instagram: @juliasamuelmbe If Only If create beautifully made nightwear that feels thoughtful, timeless, and deeply comforting at the end of the day. Their pieces are designed to support women through every stage of life and are made from natural fabrics in small batches. If you'd like to explore their collection, you can visit ifonlyif.co.uk and use the code JULIA15 for 15% off.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

On the first episode of Season 10 of Therapy Works, host Julia Samuel is joined by Dr Alex George for an unusually candid conversation about what happens when your inner world starts to feel like friction you can't push through. Alex shares that he's currently being assessed for autism, and reflects on how recent ADHD and OCD diagnoses have helped him make sense of longstanding patterns, from rumination and sensitivity to masking and burnout. Together they explore the difference between “being different” and struggling, how grief and trauma can intensify symptoms, and why understanding yourself is often the first step towards acceptance and peace. Julia and Alex also talk about the cost of becoming the “fixer” in a family after the sudden death of Alex's brother, and the cumulative impact of public scrutiny and frontline NHS work during the pandemic. In the reflective discussion afterwards, Julia is joined by Sophie and Emily to unpack the debate around diagnosis, why it triggers such strong reactions, and how the most useful question is whether something is genuinely interfering with your life. It's a moving, hopeful start to the season about naming what hurts, finding the right support, and building a kinder world by starting with compassion for yourself. If Only If create beautifully made nightwear that feels thoughtful, timeless, and deeply comforting at the end of the day. Their pieces are designed to support women through every stage of life and are made from natural fabrics in small batches. If you'd like to explore their collection, you can visit ifonlyif.co.uk and use the code JULIA15 for 15% off.  Find Alex:Website: https://www.dralexgeorge.co.uk/Instagram: @dralexgeorgeBuy His New Book "Am I Normal?": https://amzn.eu/d/aoEqbLDListen to Stompcast: https://www.dralexgeorge.co.uk/podcast More from Therapy Works: Subscribe to the Therapy Works Substack for guidance on everyday struggles and access to Julia's monthly live webinar: ⁠https://juliasamuel.substack.com/⁠ Follow Julia on Instagram: ⁠@juliasamuelmbe⁠ for tips, tools, and conversations about navigating life's challenges. If you enjoy this episode, please consider rating, reviewing, and subscribing — it makes a big difference and helps others discover these conversations.If you need help finding a therapist, visit: ⁠The Samuel Therapy Practice⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

While Julia recovers from shoulder surgery, Sophie and Emily step in to respond to a painful and familiar dilemma, wanting another child when your partner doesn't. They explore the emotional deadlock that can arise when a decision feels completely binary, and how the absence of compromise can intensify grief, fear, and resentment on both sides of a relationship.Together, they reflect on how meaningful listening, really hearing what having or not having a baby represents to each person, can soften polarisation and protect connection, even when there is no easy answer. They talk about guilt, longing, fear of resentment, and the importance of staying emotionally connected through difference. This episode offers compassionate guidance for navigating unbearable uncertainty, honouring grief, and finding ways to continue, with yourself and with each other, when life doesn't unfold as hoped. Julia and Helen Fielding will be recording live at The Tabernacle in Notting Hill on March 3rd at 7pm. If you'd like to be there, tickets are available via this link HERE: https://www.eventbrite.com/e/therapy-works-live-with-helen-fielding-love-loss-and-the-messy-business-tickets-1981420678588?utm-campaign=social&utm-content=attendeeshare&utm-medium=discovery&utm-term=listing&utm-source=cp&aff=ebdsshcopyurl We hope to see you there! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this Agony Aunties episode, Julia, Sophie and Emily respond to a brave listener who admits she loves her two adult daughters deeply but often struggles to like them. With one daughter feeling unmotivated and the other frequently hurtful or unpredictable, she asks how to navigate disappointment, set boundaries, and understand what is reasonable to expect from adult children.Together, they explore the unspoken guilt many parents feel, the shift from parent–child to adult–adult relationships, and how old hurts layer into current dynamics. They offer gentle guidance on letting go of control, maintaining connection, managing expectations and finding compassion for yourself as well as your children. A validating, honest conversation for anyone facing complicated family relationships. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this special Agony Aunties episode, we pause our usual listener questions so Julia can share something personal as she prepares for a reverse shoulder replacement after years of complications from Ramsay Hunt syndrome and a serious injury. With Emily and Sophie beside her, she speaks openly about the dread of facing another major operation, the loss of trust in her body, the somatic shock that surfaced when she made the decision, and the uncomfortable confrontation with ageing, vulnerability, and past medical memories. They explore how coping strategies like denial and busyness can feel protective, how therapy can be both helpful and challenging, and how support from others makes an enormous difference even when some parts of the journey are inevitably solitary. It is an honest, tender conversation about fear, resilience, and the deeply human work of accepting help and allowing the body to heal. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this expert episode of the Therapy Works podcast, Julia speaks with psychotherapist Oona Metz, author of Unhitched, about her extensive experience supporting women through divorce. Drawing on over 30 years of clinical practice - including 15 years running divorce support groups - Oona also shares insights from her own personal experience of divorce.Together, they explore the emotional stages of separation, the impact of divorce on children, and the importance of self-care, community and compassion during the process. While acknowledging how painful divorce can be, Oona emphasises that with the right support it can also become a powerful opportunity for growth, healing and new beginnings.Buy her book: https://www.oonametz.com/book-unhitchedResources mentioned:
 Baroness Fiona Shackleton's 10 questions to ask before embarking on a serious relationship: https://news-archive.exeter.ac.uk/featurednews/title_672700_en.html Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this bonus episode of Therapy Works, I'm joined by Professor Marc Brackett, founding director of the Yale Center for Emotional Intelligence and author of Permission to Feel and Dealing With Feeling. We talk about why so many of us grew up without an emotional ally, how fear stops us asking the people we love how they really feel, and why emotions aren't something to suppress or fix. They are information we need to listen to.Marc shares a clear, practical framework for emotional regulation, giving ourselves permission to feel, naming emotions, and calming the nervous system, alongside thoughtful ways to navigate family dynamics and become the support we may not have had growing up. It's a hopeful, grounding conversation about learning emotional skills at any age, and passing them on. You can buy Marc's latest book Dealing With Feeling here: https://amzn.eu/d/80YxubS This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/therapyworks and get on your way to being your best self. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode, the Agony Aunties respond to a deeply moving question from a widowed father facing his first Christmas after the death of his wife. Six months into grief, he is trying to support three adult children while barely holding himself together, worried he's failing them and watching one daughter take on too much responsibility as the family adjusts to an unfillable absence. With compassion and clarity, Sophie and Emily explore why trying to replace the person who has died can leave everyone exhausted, how grief reshapes family roles, and why acknowledging the presence of absence can be more healing than trying to make things “normal.” They offer gentle, practical guidance on talking openly about grief, supporting adult children who are grieving in different ways, approaching Christmas with flexibility, creating or changing rituals, and drawing in support rather than doing it all alone 0 reminding us that grief isn't something to solve, but something to be carried together. Resources: Grief Works App: https://apps.apple.com/gb/app/grief-works-self-care-love/id1558867513 Cruse: https://www.cruse.org.uk/ Child Bereavement UK: https://www.childbereavementuk.org/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this Agony Aunties episode of Therapy Works, Julia, Emily and Sophie respond to a deeply moving letter from a listener questioning whether her long, emotionally disconnected marriage can be saved. They explore the complex layers of love, duty, financial dependence, neurodivergence, resentment, and midlife awakening - offering thoughtful reflections on grief, desire, the cost of staying, and the cost of leaving. With compassion and clarity, they discuss how therapy, imagining possible futures, practical planning, and understanding neurodivergent dynamics can help illuminate a way forward. They also share book and podcast recommendations, discuss the emotional impact on both partners, and remind listeners that meaningful change - whatever form it takes - doesn't have to be rushed. Links & Resources Mentioned • Email your questions: jsamuelpod@gmail.com • DM Julia on Instagram: @juliasamuelmbe • The Honesty Box by Lucy Brazier • Therapy Works episode with Lucy Brazier • The Four Minds by Miranda July (book referenced in the discussion) is called All Fours: https://mirandajuly.com/all-fours/ • Esther Perel x Miranda July conversation (podcast interview) • Unhitched: The Essential Divorce Guide for Women by Oona Metz (guest mentioned as upcoming interview) If you need help finding a therapist, visit: ⁠⁠⁠⁠The Samuel Therapy Practice⁠⁠⁠ This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/therapyworks and get on your way to being your best self. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Emily Samuel engages in a conversation with Dr. Anna Colton about her book, 'How to Talk to Children About Food'. They address common parental fears and misconceptions regarding children's eating habits and emphasise creating a positive, low-stress relationship with food. Dr. Colton highlights the importance of neutral and intuitive eating, discusses the role of family dynamics, and gives practical advice for parents, especially those dealing with their own dietary issues or past eating disorders. They also cover strategies for handling food-related stress during holidays and how to provide a balanced, non-punitive approach to child nutrition. Overall, the episode revolves around fostering healthy attitudes towards food without anxiety, aiming for prevention over correction. Find Anna: Website: https://www.dranna.co.uk/about Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/drannacolton Book (Amazon): https://www.amazon.com/How-Talk-Children-About-Food/dp/1785120557 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this Agony Aunties episode, Emily, Sophie and Julia respond to a powerful letter from a listener in her fifties who is still grieving the sudden loss of her mother during COVID, while also supporting a teenage daughter who adored her grandmother and coping with a painful fallout with her sister. Together, they explore how trauma can fracture families, why unresolved love has nowhere to go, and how small, gentle rituals can help create meaning when goodbyes were denied. They offer compassionate guidance on rebuilding connection, supporting a grieving teen, and finding personal stability amidst multiple layers of loss - reminding us that healing often begins with tiny steps, openness, and shared humanity. More from Therapy Works: Subscribe to the Therapy Works Substack for guidance on everyday struggles and access to Julia's monthly live webinar: ⁠⁠⁠https://juliasamuel.substack.com/⁠⁠⁠ Follow Julia on Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠@juliasamuelmbe⁠⁠⁠ for tips, tools, and conversations about navigating life's challenges. If you enjoy this episode, please consider rating, reviewing, and subscribing - it makes a big difference and helps others discover these conversations. If you need help finding a therapist, visit: ⁠⁠⁠The Samuel Therapy Practice⁠⁠ This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/therapyworks and get on your way to being your best self. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this week's Agony Aunties episode, Julia, Sophie and Emily answer a painfully relatable listener question about being unable to stop checking an ex's Instagram — even from a secret second account. They explore why scrolling an ex feels so addictive (spoiler: it's part heartbreak, part habit, part magical thinking), how it keeps us stuck in the past, and the practical behavioural tools that genuinely help break the cycle. From deleting apps temporarily, to “just for today” thinking, to catching the urge and offering yourself compassion before acting, they unpack why this pattern is so common — and how to gently free yourself from it. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode of Therapy Works, Julia Samuel speaks with journalist Archie Bland - not in his role at The Guardian, but as Max's dad. Archie describes the night his eight-week-old son stopped breathing, the frantic CPR, the ambulance to Great Ormond Street, and the brain injury that followed. He talks with raw honesty about naming it as a “catastrophe,” living with PTSD, the day-to-day realities of parenting a disabled child, and why he refuses the neat, “inspirational” narratives people often project onto families like his. He also shares the fierce love he feels for Max as he is now, the joy and grief of welcoming Max's little brother Laurie, and the life-changing possibilities of communication technology like eye-gaze devices.After the conversation, Julia, Sophie and Emily reflect on rage in grief, the loneliness of “catastrophe-land,” and what it really means to hold both love and fury at the same time. This episode may be especially resonant for parents, carers and anyone touched by disability, trauma or sudden life change. If you are a parent or carer of a disabled child in the UK and need support, you can find practical help and advice at Contact – the charity for families with disabled children: https://contact.org.uk More from Therapy Works: Subscribe to the Therapy Works Substack for guidance on everyday struggles and access to Julia's monthly live webinar: ⁠⁠⁠https://juliasamuel.substack.com/⁠⁠⁠ Follow Julia on Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠@juliasamuelmbe⁠⁠⁠ for tips, tools, and conversations about navigating life's challenges. If you enjoy this episode, please consider rating, reviewing, and subscribing - it makes a big difference and helps others discover these conversations. If you need help finding a therapist, visit: ⁠⁠⁠The Samuel Therapy Practice⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode of the Agony Aunties series, the aunties respond to a heartfelt question from a listener about how to rebuild a sense of connection and community in midlife after losing several close friends. They explore the importance of actively nurturing relationships, reaching out to old friends, and embracing vulnerability as a way to form deeper bonds. The aunties share practical ideas - from joining local groups or volunteering to simply saying yes to new invitations - and remind listeners that strong social connections are vital for both emotional and physical wellbeing. Their message is clear: be brave, take small steps, and keep showing up for friendship, even when it feels hard. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode of Therapy Works, Julia is joined by cook, writer and wellbeing advocate Melissa Hemsley for a heartfelt conversation about anxiety, self-compassion and finding steadiness in everyday life. Together, they explore how childhood experiences and family patterns can shape our emotional world, and how learning to live alongside anxiety - rather than fight it - can bring greater peace. Melissa speaks openly about motherhood, IVF and the challenge of slowing down, while Julia offers therapeutic insight into acceptance and emotional regulation.The conversation moves gently between food, feelings and the small rituals that help us feel safe and grounded. From cooking nourishing meals to walking outside or simply pausing for breath, Melissa reflects on how ordinary moments can be acts of care. This honest episode is a reminder that good enough really is enough, and that small kindnesses - to ourselves and others - can make all the difference.Find Melissa: 
Website: https://www.melissahemsley.com/Instagram: @Melissa.hemsleyBooks: https://www.melissahemsley.com/books More from Therapy Works:Subscribe to the Therapy Works Substack for guidance on everyday struggles and access to Julia's monthly live webinar: ⁠⁠https://juliasamuel.substack.com/⁠⁠ Follow Julia on Instagram: ⁠⁠@juliasamuelmbe⁠⁠ for tips, tools, and conversations about navigating life's challenges. If you enjoy this episode, please consider rating, reviewing, and subscribing - it makes a big difference and helps others discover these conversations. If you need help finding a therapist, visit: ⁠⁠The Samuel Therapy Practice⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this week's episode, the Agony Aunties respond to a listener who shares a heartfelt question about feeling invisible and struggling with self-acceptance while growing older.Together, they explore how societal pressures around youth and beauty can erode our confidence and sense of self, and they offer compassionate, practical ways to rebuild a healthier relationship with ageing. They discuss how to reconnect with inner vibrancy and joy, reflect on cultural differences in how older generations are valued, and share thoughtful resources - including the book Wise Women: Myths and Stories for Midlife by Sharon Blackie and the Instagram account @thebirdspapaya which focuses on body positivity and self-acceptance. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This week on Therapy Works, I speak with Tracey, a 55-year-old mother of three, whose story is one of heartbreak, courage, and ultimately, liberation. Tracey describes the moment her marriage of 21 years ended in the most shocking and devastating way - a sudden revelation of her husband's long-term infidelity. What followed was a period of deep grief, shame, and secrecy as she tried to protect her children while coming to terms with a truth that had completely upended her world. What struck me most in our conversation was Tracy's honesty about the years that followed once the crisis had passed. She shared how, despite managing the practicalities of divorce with great competence, she carried the emotional weight of what had happened for far longer than she expected. Through therapy, friendship, and self-reflection, she began to release the shame that wasn't hers to hold and, in doing so, discovered new aspects of herself, including her sexuality. Tracey's story reminds us that even from the most painful experiences, something new and life-giving can emerge. When we stop pretending to be “fine,” when we tell the truth about what's really happened, we make space for healing and, as Tracy beautifully puts it, for becoming “more you.” More from Therapy Works: Subscribe to the Therapy Works Substack for guidance on everyday struggles and access to Julia's monthly live webinar: ⁠https://juliasamuel.substack.com/⁠ Follow Julia on Instagram: ⁠@juliasamuelmbe⁠ for tips, tools, and conversations about navigating life's challenges. If you enjoy this episode, please consider rating, reviewing, and subscribing — it makes a big difference and helps others discover these conversations.If you need help finding a therapist, visit: ⁠The Samuel Therapy Practice Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this Agony Aunties episode, they respond to a listener's question about managing social anxiety within a relationship. They explore how to communicate openly using “I” statements and metaphors, the importance of self-compassion, and taking small, manageable steps to expand comfort zones. The conversation touches on how exposure therapy can help reduce anxiety over time, and the delicate balance between seeking understanding from a partner and accepting that they may not fully experience your feelings. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In today's episode, I'm joined by the wonderful Lulu - a woman whose energy fills any room she walks into.From global fame at 15 to finding peace at 77, Lulu shares her remarkable journey of learning to let go of performance and finally come home to herself. She talks honestly about the parts of her she left behind in Glasgow, the years she spent saying yes when she wanted to say no, and the deep work of reconnecting with who she really is.We explore the power of therapy, sobriety, and meditation, and what it truly means to accept yourself - not the version the world sees, but the one you've spent a lifetime running from. This conversation is about forgiveness, authenticity, and the quiet strength that comes when you stop pretending and start becoming.Find Lulu:Instagram: @lulukcMore from Therapy Works: Subscribe to the Therapy Works Substack for guidance on everyday struggles and access to Julia's monthly live webinar: https://juliasamuel.substack.com/ Follow Julia on Instagram: @juliasamuelmbe for tips, tools, and conversations about navigating life's challenges. If you enjoy this episode, please consider rating, reviewing, and subscribing — it makes a big difference and helps others discover these conversations.If you need help finding a therapist, visit: The Samuel Therapy Practice This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/therapyworks and get on your way to being your best self. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode, the Agony Aunties address a listener's question about the challenging nature of therapy. They discuss the misconception of therapy as a 'quick fix' and explain why the therapeutic process can sometimes feel more difficult as buried emotions resurface. The Agony Aunties emphasise the importance of pacing in therapy and the benefits of communicating feelings of overwhelm to one's therapist. They also acknowledge that while therapy can't change certain realities, it can help individuals process their experiences and foster healthier relationships with themselves and others. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode, Eve shares her deeply personal story of coming out of a 23-year relationship, including 10 years of marriage, which ended in divorce due to not having children. She reflects on the red flags she missed in her youth, the challenges of poor communication, and the emotionally abusive dynamics that developed over time. Despite her loving family and strong support system, Eve grapples with feelings of grief and complexity regarding her ex-husband. She discusses the immense pressure she felt around having a child and how her identity and self-esteem were affected in the process. Ultimately, Eve seeks understanding and a way to move forward, emphasising the importance of being heard, valued, and having open communication in relationships. More from Therapy Works: Subscribe to the Therapy Works Substack for guidance on everyday struggles and access to Julia's monthly live webinar: ⁠⁠⁠https://juliasamuel.substack.com/⁠⁠⁠ Follow Julia on Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠@juliasamuelmbe ⁠⁠⁠for tips, tools, and conversations about navigating life's challenges. If you enjoy this episode, please consider rating, reviewing, and subscribing - it makes a big difference and helps others discover these conversations.If you need help finding a therapist, visit: ⁠⁠⁠The Samuel Therapy Practice⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode, the Agony Aunties return to address a listener's concern about potential infidelity, offering advice on distinguishing between anxiety and genuine red flags. The hosts suggest approaches for starting calm and honest conversations with partners, discussing the importance of addressing relationship anxiety, maintaining personal well-being, and considering couples therapy. The episode underscores the value of open communication and exploring underlying relationship issues before jumping to conclusions. More from Therapy Works: Subscribe to the Therapy Works Substack for guidance on everyday struggles and access to Julia's monthly live webinar: ⁠⁠https://juliasamuel.substack.com/⁠⁠ Follow Julia on Instagram: ⁠⁠@juliasamuelmbe ⁠⁠for tips, tools, and conversations about navigating life's challenges. If you enjoy this episode, please consider rating, reviewing, and subscribing - it makes a big difference and helps others discover these conversations.If you need help finding a therapist, visit: ⁠⁠The Samuel Therapy Practice⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this powerful and tender conversation, I speak with Olia Hercules - author, chef, and activist - about her journey from Ukraine to the UK and the personal and collective challenges she has faced in recent years. Olia reflects on living with Fragile X syndrome, both in her own life and with her son, and shares the deep psychological impact of the ongoing war in Ukraine. She speaks movingly about the importance of family, culture, and heritage, and how traditions of food, art, and gardening can offer strength and continuity even in times of great upheaval. Her new book, Strong Roots, is both a celebration of family history and a testament to the power of creativity and nourishment as acts of therapy and resistance. Through our conversation, Olia shows how self-care, cultural memory, and connection to the land can sustain us through pain and uncertainty. This is an episode about resilience, belonging, and the healing role of tradition in the most difficult times. Find Olia:Instagram: @oliaherculesBook: https://amzn.eu/d/htX5MKtWebsite: https://oliahercules.com/ More from Therapy Works: Subscribe to the Therapy Works Substack for guidance on everyday struggles and access to Julia's monthly live webinar: ⁠⁠https://juliasamuel.substack.com/⁠⁠ Follow Julia on Instagram: ⁠⁠@juliasamuelmbe ⁠⁠for tips, tools, and conversations about navigating life's challenges. If you enjoy this episode, please consider rating, reviewing, and subscribing - it makes a big difference and helps others discover these conversations.If you need help finding a therapist, visit: ⁠⁠The Samuel Therapy Practice⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

The Agony Aunties tackle a listener's question about managing the stress of a full-time job, parenting two young children, and caring for an ageing parent. They discuss the importance of self-compassion, prioritisation, and setting boundaries without feeling selfish. They suggest considering personal limits and adopting the concept of 'essential maintenance' instead of 'self-care'. Additionally, they emphasise the importance of repairing moments of irritability with children and collaborating with partners to manage household tasks. The episode also references resources such as the 'Motherkind Podcast' and the 'Fair Play' book by Eve Rodsky for better task distribution. More from Therapy Works: Subscribe to the Therapy Works Substack for guidance on everyday struggles and access to Julia's monthly live webinar: ⁠⁠https://juliasamuel.substack.com/⁠⁠ Follow Julia on Instagram: ⁠⁠@juliasamuelmbe ⁠⁠for tips, tools, and conversations about navigating life's challenges. If you enjoy this episode, please consider rating, reviewing, and subscribing - it makes a big difference and helps others discover these conversations.If you need help finding a therapist, visit: ⁠⁠The Samuel Therapy Practice⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this fascinating and candid conversation, I speak with Deepa Paul — a Filipino Indian author, mother, wife, and girlfriend about the complexities of love, identity, and open relationships. Deepa shares her experience of a 17-year marriage alongside a 5-year relationship with her boyfriend, reflecting on the different needs these partnerships meet and the honesty required to sustain them. Her book, Ask Me How It Works: Love in an Open Marriage, answers the questions so many are curious about, while challenging misconceptions around polyamory and ethical non-monogamy. We talk about the importance of self-reflection, the “emotional housekeeping” needed to maintain multiple relationships, and the courage it takes to live authentically in the face of cultural expectations and societal judgment. Deepa's story is one of resilience, curiosity, and a deep commitment to love in its many forms. This is a conversation about freedom, boundaries, and what it really means to build relationships with integrity and care. Find Deepa: Instagram: @storiesbydeepa Book: https://amzn.eu/d/2xGUhRI Website: https://www.storiesbydeepa.com/ More from Therapy Works: Subscribe to the Therapy Works Substack for guidance on everyday struggles and access to Julia's monthly live webinar: ⁠https://juliasamuel.substack.com/⁠ Follow Julia on Instagram: ⁠@juliasamuelmbe ⁠for tips, tools, and conversations about navigating life's challenges. If you enjoy this episode, please consider rating, reviewing, and subscribing - it makes a big difference and helps others discover these conversations.If you need help finding a therapist, visit: ⁠The Samuel Therapy Practice⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this Agony Aunties episode, we address a listener's question on how to talk to children about parental separation. Their answer covers the importance of having the initial conversation together as a family, being honest and age-appropriate, avoiding blame, and reassuring children about the changes and constants in their lives. Key points include practicing the conversation in advance, maintaining a unified narrative, and providing ongoing support. Resources like Cafcass, Gingerbread, and Family Lives are suggested for further support. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this deeply moving episode, I speak with Ben Goldsmith - financier, environmentalist, and father - about the devastating loss of his teenage daughter, Iris, in 2019. Ben shares with great honesty the harrowing moments surrounding her death and the tidal wave of grief that followed. He describes how he turned to nature as a source of solace and strength, and how his connection to the natural world became a lifeline in the darkest times.Our conversation explores the transformative power of grief - how it can break us open, teach us to surrender to life's mysteries, and ultimately invite us to live with greater presence and meaning. Ben speaks about the enduring imprint Iris has left on his life and how her spirit continues to inspire his renewed passion for rewilding and environmental work. This is an episode about love, loss, and the resilience of the human heart. Ben's story is painful, yet hopeful, reminding us that from the depths of sorrow, it is possible to find connection, purpose, and even joy again. This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at ⁠betterhelp.com/therapyworks⁠ and get on your way to being your best self. Find Ben:Instagram: @bengoldsmith Substack: https://bengoldsmith.substack.com/Book: https://amzn.eu/d/9IQTFpX More from Therapy Works:Subscribe to the Therapy Works Substack for guidance on everyday struggles and access to Julia's monthly live webinar: https://juliasamuel.substack.com/Follow Julia on Instagram: @juliasamuelmbe for tips, tools, and conversations about navigating life's challenges.If you enjoy this episode, please consider rating, reviewing, and subscribing - it makes a big difference and helps others discover these conversations.If you need help finding a therapist, visit: The Samuel Therapy Practice Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this week's Agony Aunties, we answer a listener's question about social anxiety returning in midlife. We talk about why it can resurface — from life transitions to physical changes — and share gentle, practical ways to manage it, from planning ahead to leaning on allies. Above all, it's about self-compassion and staying connected. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode, I talk with Lucy Gossage — oncologist, former professional triathlete, ultra-runner, and co-founder of the Move Against Cancer charity. From winning Ironman races to conquering Britain's gruelling Spine Race, Lucy has built her life around challenge and growth.She speaks candidly about facing fear and failure, the heartbreak of betrayal, and the process of finding closure. We explore how adventure, deep friendships, and joy can help us recover and move forward.Drawing on her work in oncology, Lucy also shares profound lessons from her patients about resilience, connection, and what truly matters in life.This conversation is about courage, adversity, and the choice to live fully — with all the risks and rewards that entails.Find Lucy: Instagram: @lucygossageMore from Therapy Works:Subscribe to the Therapy Works Substack for guidance on everyday struggles and access to Julia's monthly live webinar: https://juliasamuel.substack.com/Follow Julia on Instagram: @juliasamuelmbe for tips, tools, and conversations about navigating life's challenges.If you enjoy this episode, please consider rating, reviewing, and subscribing - it makes a big difference and helps others discover these conversations.If you need help finding a therapist, visit: The Samuel Therapy Practice Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode, the Agony Aunties return to address a listener's question about the often confusing advice regarding feeling emotions versus avoiding negative self-talk. They explain that emotions should be acknowledged and processed, whereas negative self-talk should be identified, challenged, and dialled down. They discuss mindfulness techniques, the importance of self-awareness, and how our body and mind interact in this process. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode of Therapy Works, I'm delighted to welcome back my friend Elizabeth Day. Elizabeth has done so much to change the way we talk about vulnerability, self-acceptance, and failure - through her writing, her speaking, and of course her brilliant podcast How to Fail. In our conversation, Elizabeth opens up about her personal journey through childlessness and fertility struggles, and how she has found both peace and purpose through her creative life. We talk about her new book, One of Us, and the powerful themes it explores: what it means to belong, how failure shapes us, and why honest connection is essential for our wellbeing. Elizabeth shares with great warmth and insight how writing and her conversations on How to Fail have helped her understand herself and others more deeply. This is a conversation about resilience, creativity, and finding meaning in the places we least expect. I so loved this conversation, and I hope you do too. Find Elizabeth: Instagram: @elizabday Website: https://www.elizabethday.org/ Substack: theelizabethday.substack.com Buy her new book One of Us: https://amzn.eu/d/5IZTy96 More from Therapy Works: Subscribe to the Therapy Works Substack for guidance on everyday struggles and access to Julia's monthly live webinar: https://juliasamuel.substack.com/ Follow Julia on Instagram: @juliasamuelmbe for tips, tools, and conversations about navigating life's challenges. If you enjoy this episode, please consider rating, reviewing, and subscribing - it makes a big difference and helps others discover these conversations. If you need help finding a therapist, visit: The Samuel Therapy Practice Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this Agony Aunties episode, we answer a listener asking how to co-parent after a breakdown of trust. We focus on steadying yourself to steady your child, keeping them out of adult conflict while keeping communication open and age-appropriate, and putting clear, written boundaries in place - a simple parenting plan, predictable handovers, and one co-parenting app for all logistics. We suggest shared reading to build a common language, leaning on a small support team (friend, therapist, mediator), and simple self-care so you can be consistent. The aim is a workable, child-centred plan that protects secure relationships with both parents. If safety is a concern, please seek professional and legal support. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode of Therapy Works, I have the privilege of speaking with Grace Spence Green - a junior doctor and wheelchair user whose life changed dramatically after a spinal cord injury caused by a traumatic accident. Grace shares with such honesty the physical and psychological challenges she faced during her rehabilitation, and how she has learned to navigate the daily realities of life in an able-bodied world. What shines through is her remarkable courage, her ability to redefine her own story, and her deep commitment to disability justice movements. We talk about the importance of community support, the role of radical acceptance in finding peace, and how she continues to build a fulfilling life and career as a doctor. Grace also speaks about her relationships, her writing, and her advocacy for better understanding and treatment of disabled individuals. I hope you find Grace's story as moving and inspiring as I did. Find Grace: Instagram: @gracesg Buy Her Book: To Exist As I Am by Grace Spence Green | Waterstones To Exist As I Am a book by Grace Spence Green - Bookshop.org UK TO EXIST AS I AM by Grace spence Green is published by Profile, £16.99 hardback. Support Links: Radical Acceptance in DBT — overview of the skill discussed in the episode: https://dialecticalbehaviortherapy.com/distress-tolerance/radical-acceptance/ ADHD UK: https://adhduk.co.uk/ National Autistic Society: https://www.autism.org.uk/ More from Therapy Works: Subscribe to the Therapy Works Substack for guidance on everyday struggles and access to Julia's monthly live webinar: https://juliasamuel.substack.com/ Follow Julia on Instagram: @juliasamuelmbe for tips, tools, and conversations about navigating life's challenges. If you enjoy this episode, please consider rating, reviewing, and subscribing — it makes a big difference and helps others discover these conversations.If you need help finding a therapist, visit: The Samuel Therapy Practice Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode of Agony Aunties, the Aunties tackle a listener's heartfelt question: “How do I cope with the anxiety I feel around my adult children?” Together, they explore: Why anxiety often has roots in our earliest relationships Practical self-soothing tools you can try straight away — from breath work to grounding exercises How to find balance with a partner when worries spill over Ways to set healthy boundaries around communication with your children The power of separating facts from anxious thoughts The conversation blends insight with compassion, reminding us that while worry is natural, it doesn't have to run our lives. This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/therapyworks and get on your way to being your best self. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In the first episode of the new season of Therapy Works, I sit down with historian and broadcaster Dan Snow to explore the powerful forces that have shaped his life: his family's legacy of high achievement, his insatiable drive for professional fulfilment, and the challenges of finding joy in the present moment. Dan speaks candidly about how closely his work and personal identity are entwined and how this sometimes makes it difficult to savour life's simplest pleasures, like a beach holiday with his children. We also discuss the influence of history not only on nations, but on individuals: how the personal lives of historical figures informed their decisions, and how curiosity and context can deepen our understanding of both the past and the present. Dan shares movingly about loss, reflecting on his experience of a late-term miscarriage and the importance of family and community in helping us survive grief.Our conversation closes with reflections on what history can teach us about resilience, the power of storytelling, and why curiosity remains one of the most vital tools for personal growth.  If you'd like to try BetterVits, you can get 15% off sitewide with my code JULIA15 at bettervits.co.uk/discount/Julia15. I'm keen to hear your thoughts! Find Dan: Instagram: @thehistoryguy Podcast: Dan Snow's History Hit More from Therapy Works: Subscribe to the Therapy Works Substack for guidance on everyday struggles and access to Julia's monthly live webinar: https://juliasamuel.substack.com/ Follow Julia on Instagram: @juliasamuelmbe for tips, tools, and conversations about navigating life's challenges. If you enjoy this episode, please consider rating, reviewing, and subscribing - it makes a big difference and helps others discover these conversations. If you need help finding a therapist, visit: The Samuel Therapy Practice Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this powerful mini recap, Therapy Works revisits my moving conversation with Nadiya Hussain. Nadiya reflects on growing up surrounded by women who seemed exhausted and unfulfilled, and how that shaped her determination to carve a different future. She opens up about the moment her parents forbade her from going to university at 18, threatening to change the locks if she left home and the fury, grief, and powerlessness that followed. Instead of giving up, Nadiya turned her anger into relentless hard work, taking on multiple jobs and forging her independence. Later in life, she reclaimed her dream, studying at university while raising three children, with the unwavering support of her husband Abdul - the same man who signed her up for Bake Off. This is just a glimpse of our conversation. Nadiya's honesty and courage were deeply inspiring, and I'd highly recommend listening to the whole episode - it's a story of defiance, determination, and the power of finding your own path. Listen to Nadiya's full episode here: https://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/nadiya-hussain-on-defying-expectations-fighting-self/id1646616622?i=1000698819007 Find Nadiya: Website: https://www.nadiyahussain.com/Instagram: @nadiyajhussain Buy Nadiya's new book 'Rooza': https://www.nadiyahussain.com/book/rooza/ Please subscribe and leave a review—it truly makes all the difference! Follow Julia at @juliasamuelmbe for more insights, tips, and conversations on life's challenges and how to improve your mental well-being. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this mini recap from our season-opening conversation with Dr. Julie Smith, we revisit her reflections on imposter syndrome, success, and the lessons she discovered while writing her bestselling book. Julie shares how the process of writing became as much about her own growth as it was about guiding others, and why cultivating metacognition — the ability to notice and direct our thoughts — is key to making choices that shape our lives. She also opens up about facing fear during her cancer diagnosis, rewriting her chapter on fear in real time, and finding courage through small, daily decisions. It's a powerful reminder that transformation often happens step by step. If you enjoyed this recap, be sure to listen to the full conversation with Julie for even more insight and inspiration here: https://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/dr-julie-smith-on-cancer-career-and-parenthood/id1646616622?i=1000691252914 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode, Emily interviews Dr. Tara Porter, a clinical psychologist and author, about her new book, 'Good Enough.' Dr. Porter reflects on her 28 years of experience in child and adolescent mental health services (CAMHS) and the pressing need to address rising mental health issues among young people. The conversation delves into the challenges of modern parenting, the dangers of perfectionism, and the importance of cultivating a 'good enough' approach. They discuss balancing firmness and kindness, modelling emotional competence, and the shifting landscape of childhood activities and expectations. The episode emphasises the value of being present in the moment and fostering a supportive and realistic parenting environment. Read Dr Porter's Book: https://amzn.eu/d/hKy7HrI Follow Julia on Instagram for more tips, tools, and conversations about navigating life's challenges: @juliasamuelmbe Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode of the Therapy Works podcast, Sophie welcomes Noemi Orvos-Toth, a Hungarian clinical psychologist and author of 'Inherited Fate,' to discuss her work on trauma, family dynamics, and the importance of understanding transgenerational trauma. Noemi shares insights about the significance of education in mitigating trauma, the impact of unmet parental expectations, and the role of collective traumas. She emphasises the importance of storytelling in family life, the detrimental effects of secrets, and the potential for healing through acknowledgment and conversation. This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/therapyworks and get on your way to being your best self. Noemi's Website: https://orvostothnoemi.hu/en Buy Noemi's Book: https://amzn.eu/d/bfbT3FH Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode, the Agony Aunties address a listener's courageous question about pursuing romantic relationships after surviving childhood sexual abuse (CSA). The listener shares their struggle with complex PTSD (C-PTSD) and interest in dating, emotions they find challenging to navigate. The Agony Aunties emphasise the importance of going slowly, staying in therapy, and reclaiming one's sexuality and agency. They suggest resources such as 'Healing Sex' by Staci Haines and Bessel Van der Kolk's 'The Body Keeps the Score,' among others. They also discuss the significance of communication and consent in new relationships and encourage the listener to be patient and compassionate with themselves during their healing journey. If you're going through something similar, I'd really recommend listening to Kate Silverton and Charles Spencer's episodes —they both offer comfort, insight, and a sense that you're not alone. You can find the links below: Kate Silverton: https://podcasts.apple.com/za/podcast/kate-silverton-on-the-hidden-struggles-behind-her/id1646616622?i=1000662497155 Charles Spencer: https://podcasts.apple.com/ie/podcast/charles-spencer-on-speaking-out-about-his-experience/id1646616622?i=1000648985885 Follow Julia on Instagram for more tips, tools, and conversations about navigating life's challenges: @juliasamuelmbe Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode, the Agony Aunties answer a listener's question on how to help siblings of different ages get along better daily. They discuss the normality of sibling fights, the importance of setting realistic expectations, and strategies to avoid escalating conflicts. They emphasise the need for parents to remain calm, not intervene unnecessarily, and spend individual quality time with each child. The episode also offers insights into avoiding comparisons between siblings and reflects on how parents' own experiences with sibling rivalry can affect their children. Follow Julia on Instagram for more tips, tools, and conversations about navigating life's challenges: @juliasamuelmbe Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this heartfelt episode, the Agony Aunties respond to a moving question from a listener approaching 60 who fears her life may be over because she's still single. What unfolds is a powerful conversation about redefining happiness and connection in later life. They explore how meaningful relationships don't have to be romantic, and share practical ways to find joy through new activities, communities, and friendships. The concept of radical acceptance is introduced as a transformative mindset — one that helps us embrace our reality with compassion rather than resistance. The episode also tackles the deeper societal narratives around aging, womanhood, and self-worth, especially the pressure placed on women to define their value through relationships. The Aunties offer a fresh perspective on how to maintain your erotic energy — not just in the sexual sense, but in keeping your sense of aliveness, creativity, and self-expression vibrant. It's a thoughtful, empowering listen for anyone wondering if it's too late to start again. (Spoiler: it's not.) Follow Julia on Instagram for more tips, tools, and conversations about navigating life's challenges: @juliasamuelmbe Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode, the Agony Aunties address a question about dealing with health anxiety, which started during pregnancy and has persisted for six years. The discussion covers various aspects, including the role of different therapies such as art therapy and somatic EMDR, understanding the impact of early childhood trauma, and how physiological changes after childbirth can amplify fear and anxiety. The Agony Aunties emphasise the importance of awareness, self-compassion, and having open, honest conversations with therapists to evaluate the effectiveness of therapy. They also highlight that change and healing are gradual processes that can't erase past experiences but can help in developing a more compassionate relationship with oneself. Follow Julia on Instagram for more tips, tools, and conversations about navigating life's challenges: @juliasamuelmbe Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode, the Agony Aunties answer a listener's question: What happens to a relationship when one partner does the work — and the other doesn't?  They unpack the emotional and relational impact of personal growth, especially when only one person in the partnership is engaging in therapy or self-development. While growth can create distance, they explain that it doesn't mean the relationship is doomed. What matters most is openness, willingness to engage, and honest communication. They also explore how to assess the real costs and benefits of staying versus leaving, particularly when children are involved. This is rarely a quick decision — it's a long game, and one that requires compassion and courage.  Follow Julia on Instagram for more tips, tools, and conversations about navigating life's challenges: @juliasamuelmbe Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode, the Agony Aunties respond to a listener question about coping with the emotional impact of an unplanned ectopic pregnancy. Drawing on empathy and experience, the Aunties offer heartfelt guidance on processing grief, managing anxiety, and navigating the complex mix of emotions that can follow such a loss. They share practical tips around self-care, the value of short-term planning, and the importance of seeking both medical advice and emotional support.  Helpful Resources: Miscarriage Association – Support and information for anyone affected by miscarriage, ectopic or molar pregnancy. Child Bereavement UK – Support for families and professionals when a child dies or is grieving. Follow Julia on Instagram for more tips, tools, and conversations about navigating life's challenges: @juliasamuelmbe Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices