Daily Kos Radio - Kagro in the Morning

David Waldman and Greg Dworkin kick off the KITM Octoberfest. "The outlook is good.", say pollsters who rarely, if ever, use a Magic 8 Ball. Republicans now have a 27% chance of holding the Senate. They have a 1 out of 100 chance of winning the House. Don't say they didn't warn you. For instance, the national bellwether race in the state of Virginia has a Democrat on a narrow edge. So does the battleground New York House contest. Texas is still red… but so tantalizingly close… so inviting to drop some cash now for 2028. Bulletin: Most blame Donald K. Trump for higher prices and are unhappy with how he is handling the economy. Trump blames himself for his awful Supreme Court. And for not banning all journalism and just hiring an ad agency. He told you he had a gun! But did you listen? Most likely, we'll have some sort of midterms though, and Republicans are pretty certain to lose, and pretty certain that they will lose. In Texas, many are voting for a change of face, many because they actually like James Talarico as much as they hate Trump. Many are voting against Ken Paxton, although drowning him would be fine. Gina Hinojosa is doing well with those who ran out of excuses for their education system. Bobby Pulido really makes Quinceañeras great again. Susan Collins probably can't sing but can't do commercials well either. Sherrod Brown really can't sing but knows how to do a commercial. Republicans discovered that there are fewer rich voters than poor voters, so how does 38¢ off a gallon of gas sound, hm? Meanwhile, as the administration makes orphanages and asylums great again, Todd Blanche wants to lock Minnesota's federal district judges up, and Kash Patel wants to tie naughty sheep down.

David Waldman weaves a fine tapestry of stupid news for us today. Donald K. Trump wants more money, more bribes, more gold. "To the victor go the spoils" is the key message of the Constitution, and the Bible, as far as he's concerned. Trump had a pile of Venezuelan gold at his feet before the bodies were cold. Amazingly, few refiners are interested in Blood Gold, even though that's been the Venezuelan currency with the US for the last decade. Six or more prosecutors have quit the Trump Grand Conspiracy case being run by Aileen Cannon. A prosecutor also quit on an investigation into former C.I.A. director John O. Brennan. There are still plenty attempting to weaponize government, however. Cassidy Hutchinson feels the intimidation. A group called ShinyHunters hacked into the FBI, gaining personal info on tens of thousands of employees. The FBI hasn't caught any of them, because they aren't that good. Why worry? Not all of them could be into bestiality… Why would Artificial Intelligence… excuse me, Super Intelligence, even bother with instantly killing us all when it's so fun to just troll everyone?

On today's KITM, David Waldman and Greg Dworkin count down the days until the midterm elections and determine that there are altogether too many of them. Are Democrats going to win the midterms? Who knows! If you were to poll polls, they would tell you that they like "Democrats", and that they really do not like "Republicans". That, and several bucks, will buy you a cup of coffee. We do seem to have a blue wave and a red undertow in those polls. The primaries portend well. Early voting is happening a lot. All that probably means many things, much of which will become clearer in retrospect. In New Jersey's 7th congressional district, home of Kean University and future former home of Tim Kean, Kean's incumbency and red district don't look like they'll save him. Maine voters might end up term limiting Susan Collins to five terms. In Texas, John Cornyn isn't going to even bother with Ken Paxton. Ohio has been falling into a red sinkhole for decades, but the data centers issue might actually lift it out. Even lifelong Republican John Fetterman says it's entirely possible that Democrats take back the Senate. As usual, most of the credit has got to go to Donald K. Trump, the least wily of all super-geniuses in world history. Victory in Venezuela, and that dotard still can't keep from spoiling all of his spoils. AI might not be as smart as Trump, but it can FUBAR a million times faster. Meanwhile, Stephen Miller is living the life he deserves, hiding in fear. Miller might not be in danger every moment of every day, but as long as he feels that way, it's okay.

Well, David Waldman tumbled out of bed and stumbled to the studio/kitchen, poured himself a cup of ambition, yawned and stretched and tried to come to life… results might have been mixed, but KITM only goes 9 to 11, then there's the weekend! Markwayne Mullin, unmarried, has had a long-term live-in relationship with Missouri Gop Jason Smith. One thing is certain. Markwayne Mullin is a moron. White House press pool members have regained access… no they haven't… maybe they have… bet they sure feel owned by now! Private security guards will be watching Postal Police officers watching Postal Union members whose jobs are being replaced by AI. Trump hasn't yet replaced all voters with AI, so he plans to send a couple thousand federal agents to breathe on any human voters who might want to vote wrong. Trump goons aren't just watching you, as snitching on each other pays off even more. Don't worry, Donald K. Trump Jr. will pay back Umar Kremlev somehow. Russians do accept all forms of payment. Maintenance projects have been put off around the country and rerouted to more important Trump things. There will always be money to pay for upkeep later, and even more if he never pays.

David Waldman is here to distract us from the distractions with some important stuff. Greg Dworkin has all the latest pole news and as you'd expect Donald K. Trump is coming up way short, but today we're talking microscopic. Trump is dragging the party so low that even Susan Collins is in concerning territory. Even Graham Platner is looking pretty Teflon. Gops might be idiots, but they aren't stupid, as they panic about importing beef and exporting diesel. Any Gop in a +15 district is treading water. Trump is W, but less affably asinine. Democrats are playing this like it's 2006. Democrats just can't wait to make it happen either. Republicans are not as enthusiastic. Trump made the US government into his PAC. MAGA podcasters just don't recall this "Trump" fellow… they pose for pictures with a lot of people, you know. Pollsters are usually wrong, but even Trump can't sue them. Donald hoped to have a few press heads on pikes to show off to Xi but he apparently appointed a TDS woke judge who told him he couldn't do that yet. That judge can't make him obey, though, or maybe he can… Anyhow it's another Trump PR victory, and if it isn't, it's JD's fault. "Why do ICE forget to wear or turn on their bodycams?", should be asked by a judge… especially Judge Brett Kavanaugh. A Massachusetts Lesbian bar almost lifted its KN-95 requirement, but patrons really wanted to keep them on. UPS dropped some F-35 stealth fighter parts off at the wrong doorstep in China.

Greg Dworkin is back, and so is the Abbreviated Pundit Roundup! We tried to abbreviate it even more today, but only partially succeeded. How bad are things getting out there for Republicans? Bad enough that Karl Rove gives me a run for my money with his own Dotard J. Trump impression. Seriously, though. How bad are things getting? Pretty bad! Trump is at another new approve/disapprove low. Not even their usual last minute TV blitz strategy is expected to save them now. Not with early voters. Not in Michigan. Not in Iowa. Not in (certain parts of) Texas. And not in the northern border states, either. And individual candidates are having to find ways to distance themselves from Trump's cratering. Some perhaps more subtle than others. (But that could change!) Oh, and while we're in Maine (because the last sentence was about Maine), have you heard about the Susan Collins corruption scandal? You have, but there's no reason we can't mention it again. Trump's construction and cultural appropriation spree in Washington continues, now expanding to [checks notes...] Ford's Theater. Unsurprisingly, it does so in defiance of local and national building and safety codes, because "I am the code." Hey, you know who else had an "architecture" fetish? We love a good hidden logistics story on this show. And Trump's latest press ban has developed into one! All in all, it was another humdinger of a day for rounding up lunacy and embarrassments. Hell, we didn't even get to Trump's crazy ass speech to the UN!

Shofar so good! David Waldman topped up his atonement over the weekend and returned today, set to talk about lascivious corruption. Lauren Boebert is always ready to lend a hand with a scandal or two or three… several at a time when she's in the mood. Now there's a complaint filed with the U.S. House Committee on Ethics alleging that Boebert had romantic and sexual relationships with three staff members under her direct supervision, paid them to keep quiet, bare-knuckle brawled in bars with them, and then hooked them up with… Matt Gaetz… in Mar-a-Lago. Somewhere, Kyrsten Sinema is blushing. Similarly, Susan Collins... perhaps not "similarly" but we won't be finding that out for certain, now that the FBI has been called off her case. Martin Kao, formally from Martin Defense Group, which was formerly Navatek, might be wondering if his pardon was lost in the mail. Clavicular continues to lay the groundwork for his presidential bid. All-powerful puppet of the last person that he talked to, Donald K. Trump recently banished the free press, but already pines for them, photobombing Zohran Mamdani in New York, while Melania slipped off for a little on the side. Bill Clinton and Barack Obama are semi-privately dismayed.

The vagaries of the lunar calendar has given us a second September Monday away from the microphone, dropping Yom Kippur right at the start of this week. So we'll have to go with a rerun today. I have to begin by asking, "Do you remember the 21st night of September?" Because if you don't, then our September 22, 2025 episode should remind you: David Waldman and Greg Dworkin are out tomorrow for a little R&R… Rosh Hashanah and Rapture. Depending on how that goes, they'll be back on Wednesday! "Autism" was coined in 1911. Acetaminophen was marketed 40 years later. Tylenol hit the market in 1955, one year after RFK Jr. was born... COINCIDENCE? Yes. Just another of the many coincidences that you can point to, that did not cause your child's autism. Not coincidentally, RFK Jr. stock is dropping about as fast as Tylenol's. Jimmy Kimmel is saved by a TACO. Charlie Kirk, meanwhile, is still dead. Not officially a saint, but definitely a martyr for whatever cause a MAGA could imagine. Charlie was a man of steel, just one tiny bit less bullet resistant than Trump but with a heart of gold that Donald will gladly sell to the highest bidder. Trad wife no more, Nepo/DEI hire Erika Kirk discovers that Tyler Robinson was not black, a Dem, a woman or even antifa, so of course she forgives him. Nürnberg vibes filled the air as DJ Stephen Miller spun the hits of yesteryear. Shhh… Donald K. Trump wants the government to destroy his opposition. Well, that's no secret. Trump has wanted that for years. What are you going to do about it, impeach him? ICE breaks present laws and will break any new ones that you throw at them too. Attorneys that don't break laws fast enough get canned in this administration. Don't you just hate Indians and Koreans? No? Maybe you aren't a tech bro. Tech bros hate Indians and Koreans. If there's a particular nationality that you do hate, there's probably a spot for you in this administration. Republicans are beginning to get sick of winning. There's no denying the Trump administration's obsessive attention to detail, at least when it comes to Hollywood-level casting of their cabinet members. Dirty cop Tom Homan should think before ordering the veal or accepting sacks of cash from FBI agents. Good thing he has friends higher up. The US vaporized some more boaters in the Caribbean that they suspect of things. Suspects remain suspects after they are vaporized. Trump suggests that people should hold off on "water fishing" for the time being… maybe take up "fly fishing?"

David Waldman needs some reeeeeeeest! He and we are tired. Sick and tired of winning. David won't be with us for his two favorite holidays, Talk Like a Pirate Day and Yom Kippur, but we are almost certain to return next Tuesday reinvigorated. NASA's Goddard Space Flight Center saved money by throwing out billions of dollars of research, the researchers, and having their unique, specialized equipment auctioned off. DOGE cost-cutting efforts cost the US billions of dollars and millions of lives, and that's just the start. Donald K. Trump will make the US trillions by not buying anything anymore. The Kennedy Center might avoid the shame of having Trump's name carved into it… by being demolished… but even in death the U.S. Institute of Peace's building might not evade desecration. Far-right ideologues have transformed American foreign policy into a tool of private gain and antidemocratic reaction, but once Trump teaches AI to grift for him, he won't need any of them anymore.

David Waldman told Greg Dworkin to go away and come back tomorrow, and he did! Donald K. Trump is not winning and is especially grumpy that Representative Joyce Beatty is a Black woman. That might not be foremost in most minds, but it's been running through Donald's like cyclosporiatic lettuce. Natalie had to print off some Kennedy Center revenge porn to try to cool Trump off, but that just worked him up more. Now, construction barricades are going up as forklifts test the supporting pillars at the Center. Trump believes AI is some sort of hoax, probably created by computers, but Senators on both sides now see AI coming for their jobs much sooner than they expected. Towns that slipped Flock cameras in, are now slipping them back out, while political candidates execute them on camera. They might look American, but they're foreigners on the inside. Gops flee DC chased by Gop Thomas Massie. The Trump administration is having such a difficult time recruiting unqualified, inept attorneys that they might bring back Lindsey Halligan. May the polls always look with favor upon Dems and smite the Gops… but don't rest yet! Gop Maria Elvira Salazar hopped in front of a DC camera to hail Mary. Even Joe Rogan is smart enough to know why Ken Paxton is losing to James Talarico… well, maybe not, but hopefully his listeners are. Canada might rebound from its abusive relationship with America and into the arms of another, or who knows, they might play the field for a while. They better get a restraining order first. Saudi Arabia FAFO, and there's more from where that came from.

David Waldman gets us to the middle of the week, and Greg Dworkin has GOT the polls! Polls really do mean something after Labor Day… Or is that when they become meaningless? Either way, polls are just numbers, a snapshot in time, a glance at the past rather than the future, not a prognostication, no guarantee... but darn it, they feel so nice… Polls don't mean a thing if they ain't got that swing. Even the Gop vote amid the biggest dweebs in 60 years seems to be sliding away from them. A fake $5 thousand won't buy Gop votes, although Sam Alito probably gets more than that. You don't need polls to understand where voters stand on AI & Flock, yet Dems are still afraid to run with that issue. Nonetheless, E. "No-Trump" Hansen found it difficult to be a single-issue candidate. Gop Tom Emmer will sell you ground beef for $2 a pound if you don't mind it's cut with bullshit. Thomas Massie introduced articles of impeachment against Pete Hegseth… 8 articles, 34 pages, over an hour. Massie surprised his Gop bosses yesterday, so it was no surprise when Gops shut the place down today. They were finished rolling Mitch around anyhow. The House passed their War Powers Resolution, again and again, including the votes of a handful of Republicans. Donald K. Trump brokers peace in his mind with Putin and Zelensky. This puts him way ahead of SIL Jared Kushner, who still needs to actually travel and meet with the people screwing him in deals. Saudi Arabia bought every Trump they could find and still have buyer's remorse. Dr. Abdul El-Sayed could not debate one of the loser Gop Mikes, because that Gop Mike is a loser. Rudy Giuliani wanted to debate him but only had the courage to tweet.

David Waldman takes us halfway through September! The leaves are beginning to change, the Senate is wheeling in its potted plants, and the last impeachments of summer flock to DC. Ok, this impeachment effort did not last long. But don't give up on learning your Latin law phrases! As long as Donald K. Trump and crew continue to shock the conscience of (most of) the American people, there will be the need for justice. A federal judge ruled that Donald has to keep his filthy name off the Kennedy Center. Expect Trump to cut a 350-yard gash in it some night soon. Trump's very own Supreme Court can't bring itself to destroy voting by mail… yet. Federal Agents might have broken state laws searching for voter fraud. Elon Musk tries to violate some voting law every day. Trump becomes a little smaller with each passing day. So does JD Vance. Meanwhile, Jared Kushner becomes the world's most successful diplomat, if you measure success with money, as he does.

50 days until the midterms, probably! David Waldman and Greg Dworkin don't spare a minute of the 155 they offer you today to keep you up-to-the-minute on the news. Donald K. Trump guesses that there's more important things in life than being adored, but he can't imagine what that would be. Therefore, he's doing as much as he can to get everyone to hate him. He's doing a fabulous job. Outside of the cult, Trumpism is now discredited, and every poll is a little more blue each day. Of course, the Gop and friends are pitching in where they can. Dan Sullivan retired halfway in his debate with Mary Peltola. Roger Marshall started his debate losing but really got the crowd going with an RFK Jr.name drop. Voters hated Ted Cruz long before Trump came around and will hate him when Trump goes away. Sure, James Talarico is doing great, but you got to give some credit to Ken Paxton and his crew. Texas Gop Bo French seems like he's in a league of his own... though he really isn't. Bo is determined to rid Texas of all people darker than him, and any Jewish people regardless of shade. French finally crossed the line however, by picking on University of Texas football. A Trump Judge™ has partially blocked the Postal Service's mail-ballot rules ahead of the midterms. Donald Trump Jr.'s latest wedding is sponsored by Russian oligarch Umar Kremlev. Russian friends are the best! While MAGA makes the world safe for corruption, The SNP, Sinn Fein and Plaid Cymru UK-exit, just as Donald hoped to see them bow and scrape some more. A gender war has exploded in Utah over the courts, abortion and representation. Gops are solving it by getting rid of the women.

You probably won't believe this, but something super-dumb and un-American happened last night at the fake Republican jamboree, and Trump was the one doing it. But while Trump was busy coercing personal pledges of loyalty from everyone in the room, JD Vance was seeding the New York Times with stories about how he was secretly against the Iran war the whole time. It's probably an eyeliner solidarity thing with ancient Persia. That's my guess. It hasn't cost him his seat at the table just yet, but not so "fortunate," of late were Maria Bartiromo, Joe DiGenova, and Ed Martin. Emptywheel had more to say, in her style, about DiGenova. The Daily Beast, too! Just in time for the weekend, what I think is the latest on the Missouri map morass, plus some more asses (like this one) trying to make it worse, attempting to impeach the Chief Justice of the state supreme court. In the same vein, more ass-wise, Trump's DOJ is threatening state elections officials for not complying with orders rejected by some 30 courts nationwide. All while playing both sides of the fence on mail-in ballots, both pointing to existing "error" rates in ballot processing and attempting to guarantee even more errors by trying to ram through Trump's wish list on ten minutes notice. As with most dumb things, you can't talk Trump out of it, but you might be able to just wait for him to forget. Another Republican has discovered the existence of a problem in the only way they can: experiencing it themselves. This time it's the Trade War on Canada being bad for a "red" state. For your weekend reading: We always knew "temporary" price increases due to the COVID pandemic would never be ratcheted back. But we might not have guessed that the rate at which prices would increase afterward would increase at an even steeper rate.

David Waldman reviews day one of Trumpapalooza. David, of course, saw none of it as no one did. Joining him today is KITM's very own Greg Dworkin. Greg usually tows in a raft o' stories, however today it was a steaming scow of fetid X-links. If you have the time, try plugging each poster's name into Blue Sky and you'll likely get the same post with the benefit of easier sleep tonight. The Gop midterm convention offered the usual homoerotic bible-beating delusions, but there were fewer takers coming in wanting to be taken. Donald K. Trump always saves money on his bribes by only bribing stupid people. Donald wants voters to pretend he's on the ballot, and that's just what the people not showing up were already picturing. Trump's get out the vote efforts are working wonders for the Democratic party. Just ask Ken Paxton, who makes Trump throw up a little every time he has to look at him. By the way, John Fetterman is an irritation, but just not worth the trouble. If polls could vote, they would likely be voting for Democrats. Here's what Texas voters think. Here's what Jewish voters think. It will be nice if the voting works out similarly to the polling. Former candidate, soon to be former Gop Representative, Chuck Edwards got a swift censure kick to the ass on his way out the door. This election, Republicans testify in Democratic ads and write op-eds against other Republicans, even if they are their brother. Trump isn't the only one who hates Ken Paxton. Voters want to halt data centers in a desperate, perhaps futile bid against AI, Flock cameras, and the encroachment of surveillance technologies. Your "smart TV" is an obvious suspect, and you should probably be taking steps right now to make it dumber. Don't worry about your Waymo however, that's just some guy in the Philippines staring at you. A "military aide" is taking the blame for a multi-person error on Trump's Qatari bribe plane. Oh well, it could have been worse, or better. Old school progressives out there who still have little brown diesel station wagons… like me… are still paying their dues.

David Waldman has another show for us this week! What did Delaware? Greg Dworkin won't say. It's after Labor Day though, and everybody wants to know, now that there's little that can be done about it. Who Rhode Island? Helena Foulkes incumbent Dan McKee. Voters demand new names yet prefer old last names on their ballots. Whose New Hampshire? Stefany Shaheen, and Pappas vs. Sununu for the Senate. Dems are messing with Gop Texan's vibes, while Iowa Trump nothing. Misery for Missouri as dueling court rulings leave Missouri's congressional races in chaos. Purcell that! In Kentucky, the state elections officer denying a judge her reelection bid happens to be the guy who gets her job. Donald K. Trump sugared up the ladies on his staff with$45 thousand each… Sorry, not you Susie. Donald leaked a map of his share of the world gifted to him by Vlad and Xi, and it turns out that Thorgerdur wasn't told yet… Bibi knew, though. Bibi has known the whole time. In Germany, the Alternative for Germany ends up being porn, Stasi, and ethnic cleansing, exactly the platform Trump plans to introduce at his upcoming convention.

We've made it past Labor Day! Those of us accustomed to picturing David Waldman in seersucker and straw boater should forthwith imagine him in something more seasonally appropriate. Beef? Is it what's for supper? Sure, technically, but with regulation on the "honor" system, you will have to prove it isn't to get a refund. Germany's AfD party isn't a far-right extremist group if compared to the Gop, etc. Some of the DOJ's components for realizing USPS voting restrictions seem to have been lost in the mail. Once up and running, midterm ballots could be counted within our lifetimes. No hurry, it's not like it's a triumphal arch, you know. Corey Lewandowski managed to sleep his way to the top of the nation's extortion rackets but fell once he let himself become emotionally involved.

We take Labor Day seriously around here. Which is to say, "off." We take Labor Day off. Not always, of course. Which undermines the earlier premise. But we're not not doing it today, so who cares? What we are doing is re-running our September 8, 2025 show. And won't you be surprised by how very similar certain parts of the news still are? Here's what we were up to at about this time, one year ago: David Waldman catches us up on the multiple disasters since Friday. Greg Dworkin catches us up on the multiple disasters since Thursday. Boooo! Trump was booooooooed at the US Open. If they don't want to hear boos, they shouldn't invite Trump. Or Winsome Earle-Sears. Tiny hands, deep throat, Donald K. Trump was an FBI Snitch according to Mike Johnson, the last guy anyone would trust to keep a secret. The Miami Herald and New York Times seek to unseal records on Jeffrey Epstein's estate, while we all know that Jeffrey Epstein and everyone on the Epstein list has been brought to you by capitalism. Zohran Mamdanimentum continues as Americans are beginning to see capitalism about as badly as they do Trump. LG Energy specialists squeezed into 90+ day rotations to set up a Hyundai battery plant in Georgia were caught in violation of that "+" part, were belly-chained and hauled out of the country. The plant they were setting up won't be hiring Americans any time soon, thanks to Karen-Republican Mar-a-Lago wannabe Tori Branum. Don't expect to hear more from Branum but do expect a lot more plants to be shut down. The Department of War begins its Midway Blitz, which is not a war, it is simply a police action. Why do so many Republicans think Trump is more liberal than he is? If people die in Florida because of lack of vaccines, it will be a surprise to Florida Surgeon General Ladapo. RFK Jr. will have seen it all coming, as he always does a year or so later. The American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists will save lives in the future by ignoring the CDC today. Ironically, the owner of one of the most punchable faces in politics, Scott Bessent, keeps wanting to punch others in their faces. This time it was the quite punchable Bill Pulte and for the same reason as Scott picked ever punchable Elon Musk. Scott heard both were bad mouthing him to Donald. Scott almost took Bill out, back there on the cement slab they have over the White House septic tank. E. Jean Carroll won her judgement against Trump again.

David Waldman takes us to the weekend where he can finally take his nap. You should not rest until you've heard this! Good news! Donald K. Trump sucks so hard that Gops simply can't avoid losing, which means… Dems win! Then what? Be seen attempting good legislation? Or be seen attempting tough justice? Choices! John Fetterman could not possibly care less. His staff, however, cares more. Trump finally found a contractor with the requisite lack of scruples to take over on his reflecting pool. Meanwhile, workers on Trump's ballroom hole might need to assist on the urgent needs of Trump's arch hole. Why is Trump suddenly concerned about the Falklands? Other than the oil, money, and imperial hegemony, I mean. Who knows why the Netherlands wouldn't leave their gold in the United States. Other names in the news: Nigel Farage was on camera in the UK celebrating all the money he made from secret foreign donations, an activity still frowned upon over there. Former Gop Gov Matt Bevin has been arrested. No word on how this affects his movie career. Milo Yiannopoulos has been deported and is the only person sad about that. Eric Swalwell should probably change his passwords.

David Waldman and Greg Dworkin have all sorts of new things to tell you and each other! In Florida, Oliver G. Gilbert III wins the Democratic primary. He will now go against Te Brown, who completely denies her resemblance to any wanted posters you might have seen. Dem Annie Andrews leads Gop Darline Graham in polls. It'd be embarrassing if she didn't. The only worse candidate to lose to would be Ken Paxton, so awful and lazy that he would need Texas to ban voting in order to win. Why just cripple voting in Texas? Destroying mail-in voting destroys voting, period. Walmart Moms have been determined to not like high prices, AI, and corruption in government, unlike, well, no one. Democrats are enthusiastic to vote. Ed Markey, older than Trump and/or dirt, is still regarded warmly. Dems are in such a strong position that one could be in a predominate position performing in the weakest, dumbest way imaginable and still not budge the midterms. Mike Johnson can support Max Miller because it's hard to make Gops look worse. Anyhow, it isn't like Max is abusing your family. Republicans blame the backlash on data centers on AI. Be the envy of your neighborhood, put a data center in your backyard! Gops rush to install data centers before the bubble bursts or they lose their job, whichever comes first. Tractors, trucks, trains, ships, and the economy run on diesel. Both parties make the easy decision to move any hard decisions about the budget until after the election. It turns out that focusing on deporting allowed more drugs to be smuggled in. Also, secret employment of social media influencers is an unlawful covert action. Who knew? Alejandro Betancourt made billions after he listed "Conspirator 2" on his LinkedIn page. Canada does not play by either mob, or pro-wrestling rules, confusing Donald, who's suddenly quite interested in bowling alleys, and having taxpayers pay for them.

David Waldman had so much that he wanted to tell you yesterday! Then, he remembered he had a show today that would be just perfect to fit those things into. Former Army Secretary Dan Driscoll believed in the rules, military protocol and America. So much so that he went directly to the President of the Unted States to describe the clear and present danger… Oh well. Sad, actually. a tragedy. Dan wasn't cut out for Pete Hicseth's troll army's crusade against cultures… and every nation in this hemisphere that Russia and China don't have dibs on. The real tragedy is that Dems will now need to tit for tat this down to the gates of Hell. Should "Purcell" apply to the federal government? Why, exactly, should SCOTUS care what you think? Donald K. Trump is set to do anything he can get away with, whether it helps him or not. Any unlocked door, he will go in. The U.S. Postal Service will be destroyed, because, it is right there, also because it will screw the election.

David Waldman and Greg Dworkin return to help make Mondays less so. Google labels Lake Ontario as "Lake America", so that fewer sheep get lost. Donald K. Trump has some schemes plotted in case the midterms go too blue. We've warned you about all of them, but David's particularly Cassandra-esque prophesy of the "rogue clerk" might indeed come to fruition. Sure, it's complicated, but David likes them that way. Trump, however, is but a simple dotard, who might be planning to do simply nothing, or in the case of the USPS, keeping anyone from doing anything. SCOTUS might apply the "Purcell principle", if for some reason they forget which administration it is. Skip Trump, impeach his money. Is Natalie Harp the Monica Lewinsky Ken Starr Republicans have been waiting for? Are they hoping to make Jon Ossoff… Bill Clinton? Ossoff's opponent believes he is Barack Obama. Red states used to be the safe place to stow awful Republicans. Now the other Gop Mike (Collins) has a fascist twink on his hands. The other other Gop Mike (Rogers) is losing all of the Trump Muslims. It's hard to frighten people with Abdulrahman Mohamed El-Sayed these days when Zohran Kwame Mamdani has look-alike contests in his honor. Jewish voters became Democratic by following their moral compass. Trump knows El-Sayed's lead is fake polling by illegal pollsters, reported by illegal reporters. Military leaders think Pete Hegseth might be leading them to Armageddon, as if he'd have a problem with that. Oh no! First Andrew and Tristan Tate, now Milo Yiannopoulos? Well, they do say assholes go in threes.

David Waldman, star of the Kagro in the Morning show for 15 years running, presents the Kagro in the Morning show. If wanted to attend the Congressional Space Medal of Honor presentation today, you missed it, probably because you weren't invited to that, or anything else Donald K. Trump is doddering to this weekend. That's ok, Donald pretty much ruins any event he attends anyway. Trump claimed a lake in his war with Canada. He can throw it on a pile with all the things he claimed in his Iran war. Canada plans to make this war hurt. Tariffs for one are tariffs for all. Trump has already found someone to blame if Republicans lose the midterms… so have Democrats. In prep for the midterms, the DOJ is hiring election integrity experts, just not experts in improving election integrity... or experts for that matter. The US plans to revoke 200,000 visas. They should plan for 200,000 lawsuits. White House construction almost caused Marine One to crash. That's why we need a ballroom. Hey JD! There might be some fraud down in Florida! 10 million dollars were laundered, cleaned of all culprits, yet all the bucks stopped at Ron DeSantis' desk.

David Waldman and Greg Dworkin attempt a follow-up to my birthday show. RIP Tim Curry, an actor of incredible range… He even did the rock! If one allows improperly credentialed astrologers to post crap astrology, it diminishes the trust we all have in predictive artists, although some will assert that we now need more rather than fewer. For instance, Donald K. Trump loves the polls that love him, even as those polls are becoming harder to find. MAGAs don't want their Gops taking their cushion. A Gop going against Jon Ossoff in Georgia had a staffer who enjoyed swastikas, wearing KKK robes and calling himself a "twink fascist". There does seem to be a lot of that going around. The world's biggest AI data center is being built in Ohio, packing the power and resource waste of several big cities into the footprint of a single large town. Georgia Gop Gov. Brian Kemp loves his data centers and will not let them go. Bill Gates is beginning to feel bad about introducing everyone to their new AI overlords… I told you that if Dems didn't make an issue of Flock cameras, Republicans would, but did you listen? Multiple states will fight Trump's mail-in ballots restrictions. Texas has already suspended more than 1 million voters. Trump figures it's about time for his tickertape parade on his Iran war triumph, after he kills a some more dead guys. If Donald wins a few more wars, they will let him rename everything. If only Canada and others wouldn't make things so difficult! Can you guess what Canadians plan to do with Trump's tariffs and proclamations? The Navy sailor who jumped off the USS Lincoln is now facing disciplinary charges, while a woman raped is told it's a worker's comp issue. Some Secret Service officials must have done something horrific to be placed on leave. IndyCar officials now outrank government employees.

David Waldman and Greg Dworkin join the world in celebrating my birthday. When buying me gifts, remember to type the word "KAGRO", because… it's worth a try. A much, much larger part of that world mourns the loss of Dolly Parton. And for good reason, Dolly had a lot going for her. Mourners go across the political spectrum, but it's pretty certain that she didn't. Donald ordered flags at half-staff, as every woman in his orbit for the last 40 years has paid to look like Parton, and as Dolly would tell you, it costs a lot of money to look that cheap. And now Tim Curry too! Many voters feel that there's a "uni-party" and that their vote does not matter. Supporters of Hakeem Jeffries say, "You ignorant morons don't understand the realities of politics and can vote Republican if you just want to be dummies." Maybe we are under the reign of Great Britain after all. James Talarico is ahead of Ken Paxton, according to polls. According to money, too. Jar Head Salsa tycoon/Jan 6 traitor/patriot Tom Smith finds himself nominated for his Michigan House district. Polling shows Dan Sullivan leading Dan Sullivan in Alaska. The Donald K. Trump midterm political convention will be about Trump, as is Lake Ontario, as is the John F. Kennedy Center. Natalie Harp is all about Trump. Pete Hegseth is eliminating every General not qualified to be a Fox weekend host.

David Waldman's not getting any younger, you know. In fact, he's about a day older than he was yesterday around this time, and a year older than the previous time we wished him a happy birthday. Happy birthday! Donald K. Trump wants to watch others lose more than he wants to win and has discovered that allies are much easier to ambush than enemies. Canada is perfect… because Canada is perfect. Perfect ally, everybody likes them, Trump has to ruin that. He needs them to be as miserable as he is, no matter how miserable we get. The weird thing is, Canada doesn't want to play that. They're supposed to take it on the chin, but they're skating in with their elbows up again. That's it… Donald is forced to go nuclear and change the name of one their bodies of water. Anger Trump further and he might come for their Club next. Trump purports to need his ballroom as the lid to his bunker, but looky here, there's an existing bunker only feet away! Maybe no one wanted to tell him about that one … Maybe they were saving that news for a forthcoming book. Goebbels, Campos, and Scavino might know much about art, but they know degenerate quite well, and hope to make a few bucks selling it, although attaching the Trump name to art hasn't been the biggest sell. John Ratcliffe, director of the Central Intelligence Agency, has popped up in Russia. You never know where an opportunity for collaboration can be established. Congress is finally getting mad about money, but holding onto their jobs might allow them to become more understanding.

David Waldman and Greg Dworkin bring harmony to the chaos. WAR! Donald K. Trump has done all he can to provoke the most un-provokable neighbor a country has ever had. Now he has a new war to lose that America will continue to lose after he's gone. The US Navy continues to lose its war against Trump. The USS Lincoln sailors finally return home to their families, as long as their families haven't yet been abducted by ICE. Navy families evacuated from Bahrain remain stranded. Any of them returning home to Gary, Indiana will be greeted with familiar conditions. Loudoun County, home of KITM World Headquarters, have surrendered to their data center overlords long ago and might be becoming habituated, but in places like Ohio, the centers are now entering with AI and Flock(ish) cameras and an increasingly abusive and silly police state, which are all pretty much supported by Gops, though less so with MAGA, and hence are a midterms problem for Republicans. Democrats are in great shape… as long as they offer complex solutions to complex issues, never overpromise and above all, remain electable. Once the American public becomes fully educated to understand the nomenclature and internal structure behind government processes, Democrats should be a lock. Meanwhile, Dan Sullivan endorses Dan Sullivan to beat Dan Sullivan, who's no Danny Sullivan. Danny didn't win yesterday's finale of America's glorious semi sesquicentennial celebration but probably would have had if he started on the pole.

David Waldman packs our heads and sends us off for the weekend. Donald K. Trump's imperial push has found a bit of a sticky wicket in Iran, yet his war with the US Navy is going splendidly, with their surrendering the naming of an aircraft carrier to him. What were the chances of Pete Hegseth ever allowing some unknown DEI hire with a CRT name like Doris Miller making some boat woke anyhow? Trump's war on Washington DC is scheduled to make the rubble bounce this weekend with his Grand Prix. Sure, some delicate old stuff might get broken during the celebration, but that's because it wasn't made in America. The event will be followed by the first annual Running of the Bulls through the Smithsonian. Those smarties in Silicon Valley invented AI to destroy our way of life along with the economy but really, any dope with a rifle could do that in 5 minutes. There's fake polling, and there's fake vote.gov, but you really need to beware real government websites, because they're really out to get you. The Department of Homeland Security discovered 16,000 non-citizen voters in Nevada, or maybe 185 "potential" ones. Counting isn't their strong suit, and usually just gets in the way. Trump needs quick money for his projects because if they are slow, someone usually makes him give it back. Trump only stumps in states that clap for him.

David Waldman and Greg Dworkin inch open the Thursday news levee. Natalie Harp! How does she do it? How DARE we discuss Natalie banging that stud Donald K. Trump? Hey now! Natalie loves Donald like she would love any top executive, you know… in a "biblical sense"… which of course includes hiding in trunks, sleeping on the floor, and maintaining one's pants and any items therein. Heaven forfend any notion of "wifely duties"! Those, Melania can keep. Pete Hegseth's "Natalie Harp" is his wife, who knows better than to give Pete any leash. Wait a second. Is all this just a distraction from the important issues? Yep, but we have time for those also. Deportations and the economy are losers for Trump, as well as the candidates he is endorsing. Shock! Polls show that Republicans are behind in America's reddest states. Democrats reign victorious in hypothetical matchups, probably across multiple universes. No one wants to read a horoscope written by a false astrologer, and similarly, no one would want fake polling, unless they found a profit in it. The White House has its own fake vote.gov. You don't need polls to know people hate data centers, and the data they center from AI and Flock cameras, because all your friends will tell you all about it. Gops were a little slow on the uptake however because all their friends are investors, yet have recently begun to catch on, from Ohio, down to Texas. America's strategic oil reserve is so low that it might collapse our economy, but if it gets any lower it could collapse the salt domes used to store it.

David Waldman brings us more news and more thoughts about said news. Greg Dworkin brings his Raft O' Stories™, and an economy–sized bag of primary takeaways. In the Florida elections, it was a bad night for bad guy Cory Mills, who had Donald K. Trump's "Complete and Total Endorsement." Trump never did like him, now. Cory was just one of Trump's losers, with various carpetbaggers going down. Florida cleaned house, even the Sarasota school board flipped. Debbie Wasserman Schultz defeated all the black candidates in a new black district, because "electability", yet Angie Nixon beat Alexander Vindman for a Quixotic tilt at the midterms. Vindman losing is the only thing Donald remembers from the night. There was a near-total massacre for the Freedom Caucus in the Wyoming primary, and yet another Trump loser. In Pennsylvania, Dems flipped a Trump 18+ district, which had to hurt more than his ear. Gops need election deniers because Dems are going to be denying them elections. Everybody's pissing on data centers, and you know what, they have a point. Dems are missing a bet if they don't get behind the growing anti-surveillance movement soon. ICE and those who want to persecute anti-ICE are part of Flock's growing customer base. Flock isn't only useful to the budding Stasi agents in ICE, it's a great tool for ICE stalkers, sex criminals and child abusers as well. Compliant Technologies products are perfect for rapists, but also invaluable for those who need a record of someone fighting back recorded to their bodycams. Donald and Pete Hegseth are playing a game of Battleship, and both look like they are winning. Natalie Harp, how does she… Oh man, you do NOT want to know how she does it. The biggest proof that MAGA is a cult is that they actually believe that Trump is having sex with her.

Have you heard the one about the Navy running out of munitions? Have you heard the one about it being worse than the one I just asked you if you'd heard? Well, have you heard the one about how Trump says he was misled about it? If so, you'll be interested to hear the one about how the Pentagon has been warning about this for a year and a half. But maybe you did hear that one. From this show! Well, don't worry, Navy fans! Trump's got you covered. That is, if you consider adding the insanely stupid demand that US aircraft carriers move their towers to the existing insanely stupid demand that they return to the use of steam-powered catapults. Calling Armando! Mork calling Armando! Come in, Armando! It turns out that for at least one "pollster," the "secret sauce" is really The Emperor's New Clothes. Greg wasn't in today, but we've been talking about the CT-01 contest between John Larsen and Luke Bronin so often, I thought it might be worth reading up on at least one report from someone who says they do know what Larsen's been doing all these years. Trump robbed you with his tariffs. You know this. But it's important to point out that those tariff refunds are going to corporations... and no further. That means they were a huge wealth transfer from you to them. And the CEO class, generally. Almost as if by design? You also already knew that Trump threatened all federal funding to Colorado to get Jared Polis to free Tina Peters. But now you know that a federal judge knows it, too. What I didn't know was that Trump has a "Ballroom Goon." And that that Ballroom Goon keeps visiting Putin in Russia.

David Waldman is back again to help us plough through the mudslide of Trump chaos. Greg Dworkin somehow helps by towing in not one, but two Rafts O' Stories™, a plethora of polls, and an excrement of X posts. Polls are often wrong, usually worthless, yet are as valuable as horoscopes when their forecast contains flattery. BTW, Dems are ahead! All over the place! When it's policy vs. "electability", pollsters say their polls are polling great. Data centers poll lower than Thanksgiving. It's Centrist vs Progressive for the Democratic party, which wouldn't be a contest if it was on policy… nor is it a contest when it comes to electability. Gop policy on Medicaid would ruin their electability if anyone were to find out about it. As would their policies about anything, really. That's why Gops are concentrating on electability, especially on reducing Democratic electability, to offset their voters who lost faces to leopards. Gops want to make 2020 great again. Mayor Zohran Kwame Mamdani 势头! Donald K. Trump's war with Iran is going so well that he's thinking of making the Strait of Hormuz our 51st state. Donald wishes his war would just go on forever, especially for the Navy. It's too bad that the Navy's base in Bahrain was bombed. Maybe if we bombed Oman, it would fix it? Trump remembered that South Korea pissed him off that one time, so maybe he'll just let North Korea rough them up a little. After all, what has North Korea ever done to us? Donald can't have E. Jean Carroll's $5 Million. Shut up, Donald. Trump's mouthpiece Todd Blanche won't shut up.

David Waldman surfs into Summer Weekend Chaos™ on today's gnarly KITM. Donald K. Trump hasn't had a new thought cross his mind in decades. He has spent the last decade perseverating his past into our present. Magnets, how do they work? Don't ask Donald, he wants them returned back to steam catapults on aircraft carriers, as he just knows that they were always meant to be. Only saps say, "You gotta go with magnets!" Finland's president sold Trump icebreaking ships back in '92 and Donald finally has the big, beautiful billions to buy them. Having Trump's name uttered in the same breath as that of John F. Kennedy's is the primary, if not sole, objective of the Kennedy Center Board of Trustees. The Trump administration will never give up on hassling Lisa Cook at the Federal Reserve, no matter what the Supreme Court says. The Justice Department's Office of Legal Counsel is looking towards the future, however, by declaring that Trump can assert executive privilege over any person he has ever talked to.

David Waldman and Greg Dworkin return with more insights and jocularity. The only thing we have to fear is fear itself… Well, not Dems. They love to be scared of fear. Tuesdays, they desperately cling to polls, while terrified that those polls might betray them once again. Wednesdays, they see that their worst fears have been realized. Thursdays, they discover that it's actually not the poll's fault, it's theirs for valuing "policies and issues" with their candidates, when they should've instead been worried about their "electability"… but then panic as the only method of guessing the candidate's electability are…POLLS!!! Bum–Bum–Bummmm! You never see Donald K. Trump sweating the small stuff, or the big stuff. So what, a few of his staff take a missile for him? Whatever. He made sure all the "10"'s got out, didn't he? Anyhow, he was actually diverting the missiles towards himself in order to save the journalists… and Morgan Fairchild! Yeah, that's it. That's the ticket! The whole point of the Gop is to appoint foxes to henhouses, so you would expect a sex abuser and trafficker to get $244 Million to watch migrant children. Pete Hegseth transferred a contract from a black-owned company to a Trump donor, marking it up 325%. Harmeet Dhillon swore in more than 100 Civil Rights lawyers but then forgot to mention who they were.

Would you like to hear about yesterday's primaries? If so, you've come to the right place, KITM, with the right people, David Waldman and Greg Dworkin, to satisfy all your post-primary cravings. In Connecticut, voters embraced change and sent warhorse John Larson out to pasture. In Minnesota, the primary upended political assumptions in 6 ways, none of which are as fun as watching Mike Lindell (and Trump) lose. Mike, ever the crowd pleaser, plans to lose the election over and over again for the foreseeable future. In South Carolina, Darline Graham and Trump aren't yet losing but are now failing. In Wisconsin, it wasn't quite a progressive triumph, but almost, with Francesca Hong's last-minute plateauing and normie Dems flooding the polls. David Crowley might not like campaigning, but apparently, he seems to love holidays. Almost no one is as normie or as old as James Carville, yet he supports Abdul El-Sayed. On to the midterms, if we can keep them. Every slimeball is spit balling election subversion, including the Wad in Chief. The problem is that people hate trump, which in turn keeps boosting Democratic numbers. Also, election subversion tends to be illegal… as if hatred or illegality ever bothered Trump before. Election denier Cleta Mitchell granted DHS elections official Heather Honey a lot of money. A special grand jury might not find enough evidence to bring anyone to trial, but it will allow Jeanine Pirro and Trump to be incredibly catty. So far, Donald K. Trump has been able to stuff 5 scandals into his "Air Force One" Scandal, but there's always room for plenty more!

While busy with rehearsals and last-minute staging to prep for tomorrow's The G. Dworkin Post-Primary Hour in Review, David Waldman had a few moments to share his thoughts on recent events. Attending the NATO summit in Turkey, Donald K. Trump bailed on his pimped-out Qatari 747 to ride home in his official 747… Psyche! They actually loaded Trump into a catering container (which should be a devastating health code violation) and onto an Airforce jet! The big question remaining is which journalists will go to prison for reporting this? Trump's staggering vanity project cash grab has been exposed… well, another one of them. This one routes national park money into gold-plated helipads and deluxe toupees. Once they were rid of Erik the Red, Greenland believed that the threat of being raped and pillaged was gone forever. Unfortunately, Dr. Phil has come ashore. Could Mike Lindell be far behind? Who knows what stupid evil awaits? Marsha Blackburn won her primary against that ever-present threat of Tennessee commies. Now, like the president, Marsha believes she's entitled to fill her own seat. Trump can thank the appointment of Bob Mueller for taking the heat off him on his Russian ties. With new tactics, ICE reaches a new high in monthly arrests, because they don't have quotas in convictions or deportations. Todd Blanche was sworn in by Emil Bove in the Oval Office because whoever's in charge has a really dark sense of humor.

David Waldman and Greg Dworkin return from a chaos weekend that was a little quieter now that Donald K. Trump is getting his pants steamed regularly. Not to say things are "better"… or even "good", it's just that the wall of reality might be rising too high for Trump and Gops to toss feces over. The US lost Trump's war with Iran and also Iran won their war with Trump. Sadly, this happened because Democrats did not clap hard enough. Iran might allow us to retreat, if we retreat from the Strait of Hormuz, yet thousands of sailors and Marines are still stranded on the USS Lincoln. Israel wants no advice from Trump on how they should lose in Gaza. The cost of living, job losses, immigration crackdowns, and data centers will be a big deal for the midterms, but candidate style matters, too. Maine Dem Troy Jackson points out the obvious about Susan Collins, so that even Democrats dumb enough to vote for her can understand. Reality just might catch up to somebody on the reflecting pool fiasco. Jeanine Pirro? Doug Burgum? Nah, and definitely never Trump. Sunlight is the best disinfectant and might have finally removed Andy Ogles. Donald definitely has a type, and Stephen Miller will have Will Scharf competing with him for attention in the Oval Office. Gop election denier Mike Rogers somehow finds nothing objectionable about his primary win yet is predicted to be quite skeptical about Abdul El-Sayed's future progress. Boom! Emptywheel embraces the low-attention span types that she famously eschews in order to describe how the DOJ invoking Trump v. US to protect Todd Blanche's fixer, Aakash Singh.

David Waldman eruditely dumps the Friday KITM at our doorstep. They're takin yer jerbs! Ballrooms, arches, Iran, and ICE will not be making America great again. Not having a job makes buying groceries tougher. The bros over at DOGE wouldn't know that, as they just moved out of their parent's basement, and have no need for real life. 200,000 jobs in Mexico are at stake as the US suspends avocado inspections. The Trump Administration repeatedly admitted in Court to withholding money from Blue States. Yeah, sure, what are you going to do about it? Surrender is close at hand in Donald K. Trump's Iran war as his stockpile of dupes dries up. Iran could take the war to the US water supply, but who cares about that? Russia was hoping to attack NATO after the Ukraine war, but it's just taking forever. Max Miller is putting $1 million of his own money into his campaign. The only election news better than that is that the usually awful voters of Tennessee voted out their unusually awful Congressman Andy Ogles. I bet this is the worst timeline. You can now bet on arson, and childhood cancer.

David Waldman brings us to Thursday, by more or less being at the right place at the right time. The Senate has been busy, finalizing a stopgap funding bill to move the shutdown to hopefully a different Senate. They also launched an entire network of fake news and have only begun to hassle Dr. Anthony S. (Science!) Fauci. Greg Dworkin rolled up his sleeve and reached deep into a slimy cyclosporiatic orifice of ex-Twitter and pulled out some fresh polls for you. They're oh so tasty and probably won't make you sick later. Also, some Poindexter is suddenly ahead of Max Miller in Ohio, which is good, as Miller sucks. Remember, vote BLUE no matter… who now? Abdul El-Sayed? Abdulrahman Mohamed El-Sayed? Well… good thing we live in a post-racial... we don't? Oh well, that name thing sure worked against Amir Hassan, who was backed by Donald Woke Trump. Today, the words "El-Sayed" pleasantly roll off the tongue of lots of happy Democrats, and many disgruntled ones too… who all need to pull it together now to make this happen. Will he win? El-Sayed is pulling his weight, let's see his support. What's in a name? Ask Elaine Luria. No, Elise Stefanik… No, Elissa Slotkin. She's the young up and coming… down and going establishment Dem, right? Now Ronald Lauder. That name used to mean something. But now that he's no longer writing it on checks, who cares? Sean Duffy, like his boss, understands that in the media production biz, getting and spending money is the best part of the creative process. Releasing a product only invites criticism, and who needs that? A few months back, Border Patrol stormtroopers shooting their laser guns into the air were able to hit a kid's party balloon yet were able to rack up more fatalities jamming the GPS of a medevac aircraft. More recently, Marine One lifted off without proper permission but luckily did not need to shoot down any passenger jets in order to do so.

David Waldman and Greg Dworkin team up to fight the forces of injustice, chaos, and general stupidity. Has Jeanine Pirro been sent to the bottom of the Donald K. Trump Kafka Khaki reflecting pool yet? Jeanine might have bought herself some time by literally carting over evidence to force the old man to look at before it's shipped to some undisclosed bathroom. Democratic voters are tired of focus-group establishment Dems, and moderate Dems are already tired of crazy progressives. And yet, temporarily arrayed, they could be quite powerful heading into the midterms. Of course, they are blessed with Trump. His usefulness as an idiot is waning with even the Gops, and you don't need to tell independents twice to stampede in a new direction. In Michigan, Abdul El-Sayed outperformed his name, and the establishment, to win his primary. Trump's candidate lost to a guy that stopped campaigning weeks ago. Missouri usually isn't too big on Democrats, but they still prefer democracy. The Kansas Supreme Court would look nice in DC. Texas also embraces voting and rejects phony voter fraud voting suppression. Not that election denialists are going anywhere soon. In fact, some are completely refusing to leave. Republicans are beginning to think that God is rigged against them. Climate has changed to the degree that the Danube River has receded back to the time when wooly mammoths and Nazi soldiers roamed the earth, leaving live ordnance in their wake. Donald was sad to hear kindred soul Max Miller must bear such vicious accusations, but such is the burden great men carry.

More primaries! David Waldman weaves a new KITM ahead of post-primary Wednesday. What's the worst thing Trump can do in the midterms? Well, if Mike Pence has the courage… Why did 50-60,000 refugees attempt to cross into Spanish-held Ceuta all at once? Were they a fake migrant caravan weaponized flashmob manipulated by the far-right? It's uncertain, but MAGA's taking notes, and probably wishes ICE left enough Haitians in Springfield to try it. When some aim high, a Texas Gop candidate aims low.

David Waldman and Greg Dworkin take on a new day, week, month, and the same old chaos. Donald K. Trump won his 43rd club championship at one of his courses. It's called TALENT, and money. You know Donald. Always bullshitting. You know he is, he knows he is. Leave it there, you're cool, but call Trump on it and you have a fight. Because, admitting he's wrong just isn't part of the game… and not playing along can lose you a job, send you to prison, or worse. Capital One was playing along, but Trump wouldn't walk away, could not shut up, and Capital One quit playing. It made absolutely no difference if Todd Blanche formally rescinded Trump's J6 slush fund, which is why Blanche did it. Gops are playing along with that, but Trump doesn't play along with anybody's bullshit but his own. Dems are strongly favored to take the House, and maybe the Senate. Abdul El-Sayed's name might not be enough to keep voters from scratching in the bubble next to it. Low-turnout voters might not turn out. Indecisive Democrats aren't sure what to do. Gop staff is filling up with young Groypers. The Evangelical Church is filled people who are Christian as an afterthought.

You say "Friday news dump" like it's a bad thing? Not when it's David Waldman and KITM! When Donald K. Trump isn't grifting money, extorting money or panhandling for money, he's stiffing people for money. You can't buy that sort of focused dedication. Todd Blanche could be attorney general today if he'd only pinky promise to never ever implement Trump's $1.8 billion slush fund/slop trough for fellow right-wing swine. At least the slush fund pretended to be a cap. AI companies are the central pillar of the economy, but they are trying to hide a staggering amount of debt. So, when one of their super-genius wunderbros dropped his $45 billion into the toilet, his toilet got immediately bailed out by his AI billionaire brethren. Bailing out their Titanic one stateroom at a time at the moment remains a brilliant idea. I In an idiocracy, not everyone needs to be an idiot, just the ones in control. The United States government map of Africa on display at a global conference was apparently designed without reference material not supplied by Toto. Trump busted Tina Peters out of the pen, she's already paying him back. Biological warfare enters Trump's war with Iran, as usual it's a self-own.

David Waldman has the news! Greg Dworkin has the polls! Voters disprove of Donald K. Trump. Let us count the ways: Lowest approval of either term. Low on his war. Low on his economy. Lowest for independents. Low on white, non-college, males. Trump doesn't have a problem with any of that, but midterm voters seem to care a lot, as just about everyone's polling is tilting left. Of course, the election isn't today, there's plenty of dummies out there, and even Barack Obama can't set them all straight. Meanwhile, Dems like Matt Schultz can't find the money to run against Gops like The Master's Academy alum Nick Begich III. Then there's those Progressives, or Democratic Socialists, or whatever they are calling themselves today, out there disarraying everything, protesting all their data centers and flock cameras… Hippies! If a guy named Abdul El-Sayed can run for Senate, times might be changing… or might not. Maybe they can't figure out the ballot. Ohioans around Springfield can't wait to move into those sweet big Haitian houses and high-pay Haitian jobs that were stolen from them. In the meantime, their old neighbors and friends will just have to die. Either Secret Service professionals actually determined that James Comey planned a hit on Trump, or they just felt like hassling him. Most start measuring the drapes before they get to DC. Trump can't stop. Donald wants to show off his latest several billion-dollar pretty thing he created, you know, the same way bosses always "create" things. It will have the WORLD'S LARGEST GARAGE, and eliminate "mobile lounges", no doubt because their update would have been electric.

David Waldman helps haul in Greg Dworkin's usual Raft O' Stories™, which was light on primaries, but had Plenty O' Polls™! More people like Donald K. Trump less than ever! The fact is, most Americans don't approve of awful people. Most Democrats are not awful people, so this might work in their favor for the midterms, if they can fight their natural urge to disarray. The 2028 Democratic primary calendar favors progressives. Progressives are turning away from establishment media. Democratic voters are turning away from establishment candidates. Francesca Hong seems nice, and smart, and progressive, which seems like a good combo this year. James Talarico is all of those things, plus a few more, and Ken Paxton is none of them. Troy Jackson has, well, a couple of those attributes, which might just be enough. Abdul El-Sayed does not have Troy Jackson's nor James Talarico's name. Ohio does not have all of its marbles, but who knows this year… Everybody is NIMBYing away from data centers, so Trump will probably mandate them for blue states. Trump wants his Supreme Court to overturn his E. Jean Carroll settlement, as it says right in the Constitution that presidents cannot lose lawsuits. Trump has been too busy presidentially thumbing through material swatches for his Dulles International Airport makeover, which just might be the best use of his time.

David Waldman delivers a very Tuesday KITM. 100,000 Flock cameras are watching you, soon to join cameras inside your car to track, monitor, and interpret your every movement, everywhere you go. We all know that if you cooperate with authorities, you won't get hurt. However, some still object to being Flocked without consent, leading those people into rebellious acts against societal norms and authority, symbolizing their struggle for freedom… or they at least become a little more creative in their loafing. Knowingly choosing to violate laws disagreed with works out really well for friends of Trump. Good news also for mentally unstable pranksters. Swatting politicians, especially a gay father like Pete Buttigieg, turns out to be shockingly easy. Florida Senator Ashley Moody has been in the Senate only 18 months and has already funneled millions of dollars through a nonprofit into PACs, an achievement previously only dreamed of by Republicans accusing Tim Walz of doing the same.

David Waldman and Greg Dworkin are here to summarize the chaos of the weekend. I, in turn, summarize that into this tiny nutritious pellet for your consumption. The worst thing about White House Correspondents Dinner is that they feel that they have to keep telling us about it. The only news ever is its chronic persistence. The White House press corps could have stood up, but they came to sit down. Donald K. Trump told jokes, explained the jokes, then posted AI explainers of the jokes and the hilarity feels like it just might never stop. Laura Loomer is not Lauren Boebert, Anna Paulina Luna, or even Sid Rosenberg, but if she read it the internet, she would believe it. Once decided, Laura changes her mind less often than Donald changes his diaper, so it's a shock to see her come out for Ukraine. Tim Pool also flips on Ukraine. Must be something in the water. Bold and brilliant military strategists Donald and Pete ran out of ammunition and requested a time out. Pete Hegseth gets rid of generals faster than Vladimir Putin. Generic Dems lead, and Gop enthusiasms are gone, but as the midterms near it is expected that Republicans will be trying to destroy the elections and Democrats will try to destroy themselves. Their enemy, as always, are Progressives. Senate Gop candidate Mike Rogers is rooting for Abdul El-Sayed for a number of reasons, most of them obvious. The thing is, Black voters are also against El-Sayed. Maine has put the recent unpleasantness behind them and are now ready to decide the future of progressive populism for all mankind. The real enemy, as always, are political consultants. Political consultants want to make the past great again. California's primary vote count might have been slow, but 150 thousand voters were slower. People like voting by mail, though. Brazil worries about Trump rigging their elections. Blue state Minnesota burns because DOGE told them to "drop dead". People that Elon Musk doesn't think about simply do not exist… which sure gives you a clear idea of the future of "Universal Basic Income", doesn't it?

David Waldman empties his Pocket, Instapaper, and various messaging apps into today's KITM. Donald K. Trump sharpied out four casualties to his Iran War because everyone knows that deaths don't count when you are on a break. The Keystone DOJ took another pie to the face and will drop their subpoenas against New York Times journalists over their Air Force One reporting. John Solomon's plans to overthrow government for Trump are going badly, which does not mean that they will stop trying or that they will fail. Lindsey Graham died, and Trump grieved over his beautiful lost leverage. Darline Graham seems to have a mind of her own, but they used to say that about her brother, too. Chairman of the Federal Reserve Kevin Warsh picked up a $100 Million starting bonus to guarantee that he remains completely more impartial for some over others. In the latest Boosie Badazz news, the pair that conned Boosie (and others), Jack Burkman and Jacob Wohl, have now signed on a new dupe. Jim Jordan accused Jack Smith of lying. No joke, that's the headline.

David Waldman offers us bite sized tapas of topics today: Olive Garden, when you're there, you're family, but even they demand ID from Republicans. The Tate bros might have thought the US was a haven for rapists, but the long arm of UK law finally caught up with them. Andrew wears capris… not too warm, not too cool. The House is going to try reconciliation, again, to bribe farmers, kill democracy, bomb… Mali, and maybe bring a smile to grumpy Old Donald K. Trump's face. Once again, police demonstrate the ease of handcuffing suspects after they shoot them in the head. Melissa and Mark Hortman's murderer gets a couple of life sentences. He shouldn't expect a pardon; Republicans forgot about him a year ago. Donald raped E. Jean Carroll. 30 years later he was fined… money! Nobody suffers like he does. Canadians will quietly open the Gordie Howe Bridge so as to not set off our president. Good luck on that! It looks like the people who think everything is rigged probably rigged the Presidential 1776 Award competition. Tulsi Gabbard's brother tried to lure kids up to his hotel room with gum and money. Those kids were not as dumb as he might have expected.