Dr. Christine Marie Cocchiola, DSW, LCSW is a Coercive Control Educator, Researcher, & Survivor. She has been an advocate since the age of 19, passionate about protecting children from abuse. Yet, even as a therapist, she didn't see the signs in her own relationship. How do we, as protective parents, support our children harmed by the coercive controller (aka Narcissistic Abuser)? Dr. Cocchiola's expertise provides the framework for supporting protective parents as they navigate parenting children harmed by the coercive controller. Protective parents can show their children a path to freedom.
Maya Laing joins Dr. C on Perfect Prey to share her and her brother Sebastian's experiences growing up in a home where they felt unsafe with one parent. When they expressed their desire to live with their father, their mother turned to the family court system, resulting in mandated reunification therapy and a reunification camp a devastating consequence for children who feel unsafe with one parent. ---
Dr. C interviews Anne Wintemute, the co-creator of Aimee Says, an AI tool that understands coercive control and supports victims and survivors of abuse. Anne Wintemute is the Co-Founder and CEO of Aimee Says, the AI companion for victims and survivors of relationship abuse. She is a fierce champion for the rights of survivors and children and systems that hold perpetrators accountable.---
Dr. Cocchiola sits down with Sybil Cummin, licensed therapist, play therapy expert, and founder of Rising Beyond, to discuss the hidden world of child therapy and coercive control.Sybil shares her front-line experience working with children who have been weaponized, silenced, and fractured by narcissistic or coercively controlling parents—especially in the context of family court and custody battles. She reveals how kids show their trauma in play, how therapists can (and often don't) catch the signs, and why protective parents are often the best therapists their kids have.
These brave young women share their powerful story of growing up with an abusive parent and navigating the ongoing trauma of the family court system. Their courage is undeniable—and their message is clear: Speak up if you can. Someone is listening.DISCLAIMER:The podcast must not replace medical or mental health guidance. It's recommended that individuals consult a healthcare professional for independent medical advice, counseling, or therapy regarding any medical or mental health concerns, including topics covered in the podcast.
Dr. Christine Cocchiola explores the heartbreaking and complex issue of family estrangement and coercive control. Why are so many adult children turning against the parent who protected them? Could it be the result of slow, covert indoctrination by an abuser?Dr. Cocchiola dives deep into the psychology behind estrangement, the power dynamics within abusive family systems, and how protective parents can begin to make sense of this painful reversal. She also speaks directly to estranged young adults, asking important, reflective questions to help them see the bigger picture.
Caitlin was a protective mother, navigating the chaos of coercive control and the family court system. For years, she believed her father was her rock—until he started giving her advice on how to beat the system.That's when it hit her.The very tactics she was protecting her children from… were the same ones her father used on her mother.She hadn't seen her mom in years. But in that moment, everything clicked. The truth rose to the surface—and with it, a deeper clarity about her past and her purpose.---
David Weeks is a survivor of coercive control and human trafficking, bravely speaking out about his experiences. His growing social media following is a testament to the impact of his message. David refuses to stay silent—because abuse thrives in silence.About David:David survived two decades of horrific abuse: familial, medical, and predatory. This included neglect, isolation, coercive control, and attempted murder. Sex trafficked at 13, with known abuse ignored, he was diagnosed with autism and suffered life-altering trauma. He now educates on trauma to support survivors and protect the vulnerable.
Dr. Christine Cocchiola interviews Jules Thompson, a mother of five, lifelong domestic abuse survivor, and advocate for marginalized communities. Jules shares her journey through coercive control, from growing up in a strict religious home where individuality was suppressed to enduring two abusive marriages that left her questioning everything she thought she knew about love, faith, and identity.About Jules: Jules Thompson is a mother of five, a lifelong domestic violence survivor, and a 25-year veteran of the family court system. An advocate for marginalized communities, she is deeply knowledgeable in trauma recovery, the mind-body connection, and religious deconstruction. Known as a fierce social justice warrior, she channels her experiences into empowering others, using her story to inspire hope and change. Based in Colorado with her youngest daughter, she enjoys live music, the outdoors, and meaningful connections. She founded the Facebook group She is Me and is currently writing a solo book exposing covert abuses within family, religious, and court systems.---
Grace, a survivor of coercive control, grew up with an abusive father and a mother who couldn't protect her. Now, she shares her story to give a voice to those who can't speak out.---
Dr. Christine Cocchiola is joined by Dr. Lisa Fontes, a leading expert on coercive control. Dr. Fontes serves as an expert witness in legal cases involving coercive control and is the author of Invisible Chains, the second book ever written on the topic. In this powerful conversation, she sheds light on the insidious tactics abusers use to manipulate and dominate their victims—often without ever resorting to physical violence. Learn More from Dr. Lisa Fontes: Lisa A. Fontes, PhD is an expert on coercive control, child abuse, and intimate partner violence. A researcher, professor, and expert witness, she has authored Invisible Chains, Interviewing Clients Across Cultures, and Child Abuse and Culture. A Senior Lecturer at UMass Amherst, she has over 30 years of experience in research, psychotherapy, and education. Her work is widely published, with millions of readers on Psychology Today and Domesticshelters.org. She has served as an expert witness in 17 states on trauma, abuse, and child development.
Ashton Goff joins me in this heartbreaking episode to share his experiences as a child growing up in a home with a coercive controller and narcissistic abuser. He recounts being sent to a reunification camp with his abusive father and being separated from his mother for 3.5 years. Tragically, his brother remains in the custody of their abusive father. These stories are not isolated—they reflect the devastating reality faced by children worldwide who are being trafficked by family courts. ---
Dr. Cocchiola sheds light on the intense struggles faced by protective parents when their children are manipulated by abusers. She shares a heart-wrenching story of a mother whose child, after a period of reconnected attachment, is now making false accusations under the influence of an abuser. Through this case study, Dr. Cocchiola explores the harmful tactics of abusers, such as intimidation, isolation, and brainwashing, and how they impact a child's emotional and psychological development.
Tina Swithin of One Mom's Battle joins Dr. C to share insights on engaging family courts to better protect our children. Don't miss this important discussion! About Tina: Tina Swithin, author of "Divorcing a Narcissist,” creator of Family Court Awareness Month and "One Mom's Battle," is a survivor of a tumultuous custody battle, where she acted as her own attorney and prevailed. Transforming her personal experiences into advocacy, Tina has become one of the leading activists for family court reform. Through her social media platform, Tina brings survivors together for support, legislative change, and other advocacy-related calls-to-action. Website: www.onemomsbattle.com Facebook: www.facebook.com/onemomsbattle Instagram: www.instagram.com/onemomsbattle ---
When an older or more independent child no longer fulfills the abuser's needs, they will often shift their focus to another child. This pattern is predictable, and it's crucial to anticipate it. PREDICT what's coming, PREPARE for it, and PROTECT yourself and your children effectively.
Dr. C and Dr. Salerno delve into the nature and nurture of narcissism, exploring strategies to support children growing up in these family systems and help prevent them from adopting these traits. About Dr. Peter: Dr. Peter Salerno, PsyD, LMFT, is a licensed psychotherapist, trauma specialist, and award-winning author. With advanced certifications in Family and Complex Trauma, Psychoanalytic Psychotherapy, and Personality Disorder Treatment, he brings a science-based approach to clinical practice. Dr. Salerno is trained in EMDR and qualified to administer the Hare Psychopathy Checklist-Revised (PCL-R). He has treated mental health conditions across diverse settings, including domestic violence shelters, juvenile detention centers, and private practice. As a consultant to law enforcement, he has guided agencies in identifying and addressing personality disorders. His book, Fit for Off Duty, is required reading at the FBI Academy. Currently, Dr. Salerno works in private practice and has authored six books. Check out: The Nature and Nurture of Narcissism: Understanding Narcissistic Personality Disorder from the Perspective of Gene - Environment Interaction https://www.amazon.com/Nature-Nurture-Narcissism-Understanding-Narcissistic/dp/B0DC565T78 ---
In this episode of Perfect Prey, we delve into the subtle yet devastating tactics abusers use to lure tweens and teens into alignment, often at the expense of protective parents. We explore how authoritarian styles of parenting evolve into permissive manipulation and discuss strategies for safeguarding children without compromising their trust.
Dr. Andrew Cicchetti a psychotherapist and coercive control advocate and expert comes on the podcast to share his perspective on how predators prey upon their victims - both adults and children. You won't want to miss this episode full of nuggets! Follow Dr. Andrew Cicchetti: X: https://x.com/andrewcicchett1 Instagram: www.instagram.com/drandrewcicchett Psychology Today: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/therapists/andrew-thomas-cicchetti-coercive-control-narcissistic-abuse-bronx-ny/317593 ---
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Trauma bonding can keep us locked in an abusive relationship. It's a neurological response to the abuse that creates significant vulnerability. It happens to our children too—they may become bonded to their abuser (your abuser). About Dr. Nadine: Dr. Nadine Macaluso, known to her patients as Dr. Nae, is the real-life inspiration behind Naomi Belfort's character in "The Wolf of Wall Street." She survived a turbulent eight-year marriage to Jordan Belfort, marked by abuse, greed, and trauma. Following her experiences, Dr. Macaluso relocated to California. Her journey of trauma and healing inspired her to return to school at age 39, where she earned her Master's in counseling and a Ph.D. in somatic psychotherapy. She further specialized with a two-year postdoctoral training in the Neuro-affective Relational Model (NARM). As a therapist, Dr. Macaluso combines her education and personal experiences to help others heal from trauma. Her practice focuses on assisting patients in connecting with their authentic selves, fostering confidence, resilience, and agency. Dr. Macaluso firmly believes in the potential for post-traumatic growth, instilling hope in her patients and guiding them to reach their potential in life and love. ---
Caitlyn is my first adult child guest, joining us to shares with us her experiences of growing up in a home with a coercive controller. Her escape from the abuser was able to show her mom a path to freedom. The strength and resilience of these children gives us all hope.
Dr. Christine and Amy Polacko expose the disturbing realities within the family court system. In this episode, they discuss their new book FRAMED: Women in the Family Court Underworld which highlights the struggles of mothers facing coercive control and narcissistic abuse. Learn how abusers manipulate the system and why family court often fails to protect victims. Tune in for an eye-opening conversation that aims to inspire change and support those impacted by these injustices. Don't miss out—SUBSCRIBE to our list to be among the first to receive updates!
Dr. Cocchiola delves deeper into the subject of grief and loss, particularly focusing on the overlooked and compound grief experienced by victims of coercive control. She discusses the various forms of loss that occur beyond death, highlighting the emotional turmoil and unacknowledged grief associated with coercive control in family dynamics. Dr. Cocchiola also emphasizes the socio-legal challenges protective parents face and their ongoing struggles with grief and healing while aiming to educate and empower victims. --- Follow Dr. Christine on social media:
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Dr. Cocchiola highlights how coercive control in the home can significantly impact a child's developing brain and emotional wellbeing. Drawing from her experiences in child welfare and as a survivor herself, she emphasizes the importance of providing a safe space for children by preventing them from being forced into interactions with their abusers. --- Follow Dr. Christine on social media: Instagram: @dr.cocchiola_coercivecontrol Facebook: @dr.cocchiola.coercivecontrol Twitter: @coercivecontrol YouTube: @DrCocchiola Website: https://coercivecontrolconsulting.com Book a 15-minute FREE consultation with Dr. Cocchiola: https://calendly.com/drcocchiola/15min?month=2023-12 Become a Certified Trauma-Informed Protective Parent in this intensive educational program with an option for LIVE coaching/support to guide protective parents as they navigate the stormy seas of parenting a child who has been coercively controlled. Learn more about The Protective Parenting Program: A Coercive Control Trauma-Informed Parenting Program: https://go.drcocchiola.com/ppp24q2wselfstudy DISCLAIMER: The podcast must not replace medical or mental health guidance. It's recommended that individuals consult a healthcare professional for independent medical advice, counseling, or therapy regarding any medical or mental health concerns, including topics covered in the podcast.
Do you see it? Watch for it and then the patterns will become evident. When the patterns are visible, then we can give them the support they need. --- Follow Dr. Christine on social media: Instagram: @dr.cocchiola_coercivecontrol Facebook: @dr.cocchiola.coercivecontrol Twitter: @coercivecontrol YouTube: @DrCocchiola Website: https://coercivecontrolconsulting.com Book a 15-minute FREE consultation with Dr. Cocchiola: https://calendly.com/drcocchiola/15min?month=2023-12 Become a Certified Trauma-Informed Protective Parent in this intensive educational program with an option for LIVE coaching/support to guide protective parents as they navigate the stormy seas of parenting a child who has been coercively controlled. Learn more about The Protective Parenting Program: A Coercive Control Trauma-Informed Parenting Program: https://go.drcocchiola.com/ppp24q2wselfstudy DISCLAIMER: The podcast must not replace medical or mental health guidance. It's recommended that individuals consult a healthcare professional for independent medical advice, counseling, or therapy regarding any medical or mental health concerns, including topics covered in the podcast.
The Coercive Controller exerts power over everyone - including our children. His primary focus is to ensure our children feel shame and he kindles that overtly and covertly with them. We need to do whatever we can to extinguish this - shame-reducing responses are so important, yet so challenging when our children trigger our trauma. --- Follow Dr. Christine on social media: Instagram: @dr.cocchiola_coercivecontrol Facebook: @dr.cocchiola.coercivecontrol Twitter: @coercivecontrol YouTube: @DrCocchiola Website: https://coercivecontrolconsulting.com Book a 15-minute FREE consultation with Dr. Cocchiola: https://calendly.com/drcocchiola/15min?month=2023-12 Become a Certified Trauma-Informed Protective Parent in this intensive educational program with an option for LIVE coaching/support to guide protective parents as they navigate the stormy seas of parenting a child who has been coercively controlled. Learn more about The Protective Parenting Program: A Coercive Control Trauma-Informed Parenting Program: https://go.drcocchiola.com/ppp24q2wselfstudy DISCLAIMER: The podcast must not replace medical or mental health guidance. It's recommended that individuals consult a healthcare professional for independent medical advice, counseling, or therapy regarding any medical or mental health concerns, including topics covered in the podcast.
What if you could look down on the relationship dynamics with the coercive controller [Narcissistic Abuser]? What has the coercive controller been saying about you you since DAY ONE? We need THE LIST so that we can counteract the abusers intentional diminishing of the protective parent and we need to begin to change THE STORY our children believe to be true. --- Follow Dr. Christine on social media: Instagram: @dr.cocchiola_coercivecontrol Facebook: @dr.cocchiola.coercivecontrol Twitter: @coercivecontrol YouTube: @DrCocchiola Website: https://coercivecontrolconsulting.com Book a 15-minute FREE consultation with Dr. Cocchiola: https://calendly.com/drcocchiola/15min?month=2023-12 Become a Certified Trauma-Informed Protective Parent in this intensive educational program with an option for LIVE coaching/support to guide protective parents as they navigate the stormy seas of parenting a child who has been coercively controlled. Learn more about The Protective Parenting Program: A Coercive Control Trauma-Informed Parenting Program: https://go.drcocchiola.com/ppp24q1wselfstudy DISCLAIMER: The podcast must not replace medical or mental health guidance. It's recommended that individuals consult a healthcare professional for independent medical advice, counseling, or therapy regarding any medical or mental health concerns, including topics covered in the podcast.
The threats of revenge are all too real: The financial ruin that is often further inflicted through the legal process is overwhelming. It's all intentional. It's all planned. --- Follow Dr. Christine on social media: Instagram: @dr.cocchiola_coercivecontrol Facebook: @dr.cocchiola.coercivecontrol Twitter: @coercivecontrol YouTube: @DrCocchiola Website: https://coercivecontrolconsulting.com The podcast must not replace medical or mental health guidance. It's recommended that individuals consult a healthcare professional for independent medical advice, counseling, or therapy regarding any medical or mental health concerns, including topics covered in the podcast.
In this episode Dr. Cocchiola begins to unpack the various ways that coercive controllers inflict their harm. It's ALL intentional. It's a course of conduct. A pattern that is often insidious yet cumulative. It's intimate terrorism. It limits the freedoms of an individual - as Dr. Evan Stark states: "Coercive Control is a liberty crime and we MUST be in the business of EMANCIPATION". --- Follow Dr. Christine on social media: Instagram: @dr.cocchiola_coercivecontrol Facebook: @dr.cocchiola.coercivecontrol Twitter: @coercivecontrol YouTube: @DrCocchiola Website: https://coercivecontrolconsulting.com The podcast must not replace medical or mental health guidance. It's recommended that individuals consult a healthcare professional for independent medical advice, counseling, or therapy regarding any medical or mental health concerns, including topics covered in the podcast.
Their egos so compromised and their goal to compromise the adult victims' ego and their children's ego - all to maintain control. Our children particularly vulnerable. Who are these individuals? What is it that they are doing? How do they become individuals so readily willing to intentionally harm? Why do they abuse? --- Follow Dr. Christine on social media: Instagram: @dr.cocchiola_coercivecontrol Facebook: @dr.cocchiola.coercivecontrol Twitter: @coercivecontrol YouTube: @DrCocchiola Website: https://coercivecontrolconsulting.com The podcast must not replace medical or mental health guidance. It's recommended that individuals consult a healthcare professional for independent medical advice, counseling, or therapy regarding any medical or mental health concerns, including topics covered in the podcast.
Dr. Cocchiola defines coercive control, highlighting its impact on children beyond physical abuse. She emphasizes its role in domestic and child abuse, often concealed from authorities. Addressing children's vulnerability as "Perfect Prey," she stresses the vital support protective parents offer to those exposed to coercive control. Follow Dr. Christine on social media: Instagram: @dr.cocchiola_coercivecontrol Facebook: @dr.cocchiola.coercivecontrol Twitter: @coercivecontrol YouTube: @DrCocchiola Website: https://coercivecontrolconsulting.com The podcast must not replace medical or mental health guidance. It's recommended that individuals consult a healthcare professional for independent medical advice, counseling, or therapy regarding any medical or mental health concerns, including topics covered in the podcast.
This episode begins to outline the steps of derailing the coercive controller's plan and gives us the perspective of this abusive parent. For our children, Compliance is an Act of Survival. DISCLAIMER: The podcast must not replace medical or mental health guidance. It's recommended that individuals consult a healthcare professional for independent medical advice, counseling, or therapy regarding any medical or mental health concerns, including topics covered in the podcast. Follow Dr. Christine on social media: FACEBOOK: https://www.facebook.com/dr.cocchiola.coercivecontrol INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/dr.cocchiola_coercivecontrol THREADS: https://www.threads.net/@dr.cocchiola_coercivecontrol TWITTER (X): https://twitter.com/coercivecontrol WEBSITE: https://coercivecontrolconsulting.com Become a Certified Trauma-Informed Protective Parent in this intensive educational program with an option for LIVE coaching/support to guide protective parents as they navigate the stormy seas of parenting a child who has been coercively controlled. The Protective Parenting Program: A Coercive Control Trauma-Informed Parenting Program: https://go.drcocchiola.com/ppp24q1wselfstudy
Kantianism comes from the philosopher Immanuel Kant: "the idea that we have a moral duty to act in a good way - whether it benefits us or not. People are ends unto themselves and not pawns in someone else's games" - unless of course, we are dealing with a coercive controller [narcissistic abuser]. Then everyone is fair game - especially our children. In this in-depth episode, Dr. Cocchiola explores how individuals, often narcissistic abusers or coercive controllers, prey on empathetic and loyal individuals. She then expands this concept to children who may be more susceptible to this form of manipulation due to the power dynamics with parents or guardians. She emphasizes the importance of understanding these manipulations and the dangers they pose within families. Dr. Cocchiola examines the coercive controller's tactics, from manipulating children and weaponizing them against the protective parent to using children to fill their ego tanks. She also discusses the damage this form of abuse causes, defining it as betrayal trauma and complex trauma, and echoes a strong need for recognition and intervention. DISCLAIMER: The podcast must not replace medical or mental health guidance. It's recommended that individuals consult a healthcare professional for independent medical advice, counseling, or therapy regarding any medical or mental health concerns, including topics covered in the podcast. Follow Dr. Christine on social media: FACEBOOK: https://www.facebook.com/dr.cocchiola.coercivecontrol INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/dr.cocchiola_coercivecontrol THREADS: https://www.threads.net/@dr.cocchiola_coercivecontrol TWITTER (X): https://twitter.com/coercivecontrol WEBSITE: https://coercivecontrolconsulting.com Become a Certified Trauma-Informed Protective Parent in this intensive educational program with an option for LIVE coaching/support to guide protective parents as they navigate the stormy seas of parenting a child who has been coercively controlled. The Protective Parenting Program: A Coercive Control Trauma-Informed Parenting Program: https://go.drcocchiola.com/ppp24q1wselfstudy
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