Podcasts about Kitten

Jess is joined by comedian & Drag Race winner BOB THE DRAG QUEEN!  Topics — RuPaul discovering Bob at The Monster in the West Village (via Kathy Najimy), a weekend with Whoopi Goldberg, getting lost in Brooklyn & Long Island, ruling Barracuda after Candis Cayne & Peppermint, his first drag name, “Kitten with a Whip,” and his love for To Wong Foo. Plus — the story behind his awkward Watch What Happens Live appearance. ⭐ IG: @jessxnyc  ⭐ Jess' docu-series on the rise & fall of SoulCycle — Cult of Body & Soul ⭐ Jess' docu-series on the history, mystique & lore of Fire Island — Finding Fire Island

On this "Something Offbeat" weird news roundup, you'll hear about cat fed to a snake from WWL's Scoot, a man pretending to be a higher schooler from the Dana and Parks Show out of KMBZ and new road rage data from WCCO's Adam and Jordana.

On this "Something Offbeat" weird news roundup, you'll hear about cat fed to a snake from WWL's Scoot, a man pretending to be a higher schooler from the Dana and Parks Show out of KMBZ and new road rage data from WCCO's Adam and Jordana.

On this "Something Offbeat" weird news roundup, you'll hear about cat fed to a snake from WWL's Scoot, a man pretending to be a higher schooler from the Dana and Parks Show out of KMBZ and new road rage data from WCCO's Adam and Jordana.

On this "Something Offbeat" weird news roundup, you'll hear about cat fed to a snake from WWL's Scoot, a man pretending to be a higher schooler from the Dana and Parks Show out of KMBZ and new road rage data from WCCO's Adam and Jordana.

On this "Something Offbeat" weird news roundup, you'll hear about cat fed to a snake from WWL's Scoot, a man pretending to be a higher schooler from the Dana and Parks Show out of KMBZ and new road rage data from WCCO's Adam and Jordana.

On this "Something Offbeat" weird news roundup, you'll hear about cat fed to a snake from WWL's Scoot, a man pretending to be a higher schooler from the Dana and Parks Show out of KMBZ and new road rage data from WCCO's Adam and Jordana.

On this "Something Offbeat" weird news roundup, you'll hear about cat fed to a snake from WWL's Scoot, a man pretending to be a higher schooler from the Dana and Parks Show out of KMBZ and new road rage data from WCCO's Adam and Jordana.

WTF?!?!?See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Flight descends into chaos as two male passengers eat their passports mid-flight. Teacher apologizes for feeding a kitten to the classroom snake. Chines film studio criticized for using AI to turn a gay couple straight in newly released Australian horror film. // Weird AF News is the only daily weird news podcast in the world. Weird news 5 days/week and on Friday it's only Floridaman. SUPPORT by joining the Weird AF News Patreon http://patreon.com/weirdafnews - OR buy Jonesy a coffee at http://buymeacoffee.com/funnyjones Buy MERCH: https://weirdafnews.merchmake.com/ - Check out the official website https://WeirdAFnews.com and FOLLOW host Jonesy at http://instagram.com/funnyjones

Move over, self-help gurus—this week on Cattitude, Michelle Fern welcomes veteran writer John Riddle and his grandsons Alex and Gavin Podgorski to introduce their whiskered life coach, Mr. Dill Pickles. We're celebrating Life Advice from Mr. Dill Pickles, a hilariously sassy new book (now on Amazon) delivering 30 bite-size lessons for living your best cat life—think “Nap like it's your job,” “Only cuddle when it's inconvenient,” and “The laser is never real… but chase it anyway.” Co-authored by Alex and Gavin with Pop-Pop's polish from John, each tip comes with laugh-out-loud explanations and “cat fun facts.” You'll even hear a rare proclamation from atop the fridge as Mr. Dill Pickles explains why sunbeams beat spreadsheets every time. If you love cats, comedy, and unapologetic feline wisdom, curl up, press play, and let Mr. Dill Pickles run your nine lives.EPISODE NOTES: Life Advice from Mr. Dill PicklesBecome a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/cattitude-the-1-cat-podcast--6666768/support.

Scoot rounds up some offbeat news from the first half of the week including a Texas teacher who fed her sickly kitten to a classroom snake, traumatizing her students - and making headlines across the world

09-29-25 - BR - MON - It's Natl Coffee Day - Teacher Allowed Student To Feed Ailing Kitten To Snake - Company To Have Drones Follow ShopliftersSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

09-29-25 - BR - MON - It's Natl Coffee Day - Teacher Allowed Student To Feed Ailing Kitten To Snake - Company To Have Drones Follow ShopliftersSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

It's your Ill-Advised News, the stupid criminals of the day. Support the show and follow us here Twitter, Insta, Apple, Amazon, Spotify and the Edge! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Teacher apologizes for feeding a kitten to a snake HR 4 full 2257 Mon, 29 Sep 2025 18:37:06 +0000 UrovnBFAr0AI3DaGaj2wgbZrF4NQfD5D news MIDDAY with JAYME & WIER news Teacher apologizes for feeding a kitten to a snake HR 4 From local news & politics, to what's trending, sports & personal stories...MIDDAY with JAYME & WIER will get you through the middle of your day! © 2025 Audacy, Inc. News False https://player.amperwavepodcasting.co

32.056 This IS the rockabilly show you've been looking for! Latch your ears onto the greatest 3 hour rockin' radio program in the world: here comes DJ Del Villarreal's "Go Kat, GO! The Rock-A-Billy Show!" Enjoy fresh new rockin' music from Jimmy Dale Richardson, Kitten & The Tonics, Deke Dickerson & The Whippersnappers, Los Straitjackets, Jane Rose & The Deadends, Joshua Hedley & All Hat, Lords of the Highway, Dale Rocka and the Volcanoes and even Dominic Mowes & the Class-O-Mates! We're also dishing up some classic old-school 'billy music from legends such as Lonnie Mack, Bennie Ingram, Kenny Parchman, Johnny Powers, Gene Vincent & The Blue Caps, Conway Twitty and Carl Perkins to name but a few! Great suggestions come in all the time and we LOVE hearing from fans who have killer-diller requests! Don't be shy: send in your must-hear songs to del@motorbilly.com Always good to the last bop™, it's DJ Del Villarreal's "Go Kat, GO!"Please follow on FaceBook, Instagram & Twitter!

Monday - Bob Frier joins us following his 60th birthday. We learn Jimmy Kimmel will return to ABC. We talk favorite horror films, bad roads, the American dream and Priscilla Presley. BAM questions us on our personality traits. Brandon Kravitz on a rough NFL weekend and Orlando City win. Attorney Ray Traendly on a Poppi class action lawsuit. Plus, JCS News, JCS Trivia & You Heard it Here First.

Monday - Bob Frier joins us following his 60th birthday. We learn Jimmy Kimmel will return to ABC. We talk favorite horror films, bad roads, the American dream and Priscilla Presley. BAM questions us on our personality traits. Brandon Kravitz on a rough NFL weekend and Orlando City win. Attorney Ray Traendly on a Poppi class action lawsuit. Plus, JCS News, JCS Trivia & You Heard it Here First. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

What's on Craigslist 9-22-2025 …Kitten from Hell for good home …Need a Date for My Mom's 4th Wedding …Chessy, Wet, and Ready

Lisa Schermerhorn is a Quantum Healer and celebrated author of the popular book, “Every Truth is a Lie.” Lisa believes that “individuals who use focused intention, visualization, and energy transfer, they can stimulate their own body's innate healing capabilities.” She is a Certified Hypnotherapist, Master Practitioner of Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP), and an Energy Medicine Practitioner, specializing in the release of conscious and unconscious behaviors, inherited ancestral beliefs, and deep quantum healing. Her work helps clients break free from limiting patterns and access their full potential. Lisa believes we can also use this energy to help our cats live peaceful and healthier life with us as well. After all, if you are feeling more at peace with yourself, that energy will reflect in how your pets behave as well. Join Rita and Lisa as they discuss how we can help our cats (and other pets) achieve a more peaceful existence, as well as ourselves. They'll and also talk about her upcoming film “Zero Limits.”EPISODE NOTES: Lisa Schermerhorn, Energy Medicine Practitioner Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/19-cats-and-counting-on-pet-life-radio-petliferadio-com--6667858/support.

"A cat that is well socialized is highly adoptable. A cat that is not well socialized sits in the shelter. It's an important part of your fostering responsibility to get them ready to live outside. Before it was just saving their lives. But now we know better.” This episode is sponsored-in-part by Maddie's Fund and The Community Cat Clinic. In this episode, host Stacy LeBaron welcomes back Marnie Russ, founder of National Kitten College, for an update on her innovative approach to neonatal kitten care. Since her first appearance on the podcast in 2016-2017, Marnei has grown her innovative "Kitten College" program from a small local initiative into a national movement that has fundamentally changed how shelters approach kitten fostering and care. What started as a business plan that would have "gotten an F in college" has evolved into a sophisticated system that increased kitten saves from 92 to nearly 1,600 annually while achieving an extraordinary 94-96% live release rate for neonates. Marnie explains how her grade-based foster system (freshman, sophomore, junior, senior) allows fosters to specialize in the age groups they prefer while ensuring kittens receive optimal socialization through multiple placements. This model challenges traditional fostering wisdom that discouraged moving kittens between homes, instead proving that strategic movement enhances socialization and health outcomes. She details how the program evolved organically, with fosters creating their own "conveyor belt" systems and team approaches that maximize both volunteer satisfaction and kitten success rates. The conversation explores the critical intersection between TNR work and kitten programs, addressing how Kitten College supports community cat efforts by providing reliable placement options for trapped litters. Marnie discusses her partnership with UC Davis and University of Florida to ensure all recommendations align with current shelter medicine best practices, her work developing the first national neonatal kitten training center, and her commitment to making these resources free or low-cost for rural and under-resourced communities. This episode demonstrates how innovative thinking about traditional shelter practices can create scalable solutions that benefit both animals and the people who care for them. Press play now for: How Marnie's original collaboration with National Kitten Coalition led to studying major nurseries nationwide The evolution from 92 kittens annually to nearly 1,600 with 94-96% live release rates for neonates The grade-based foster system (freshman through senior) that allows specialization and prevents foster burnout Why moving kittens between foster homes improves socialization rather than harming it How the "conveyor belt" system emerged organically with foster teams working together The critical connection between TNR efforts and kitten placement programs during summer months Partnership strategies between Kitten College programs and community cat trappers Working with UC Davis and University of Florida to align practices with current shelter medicine Development of the first national neonatal kitten training center in partnership with Humane Rescue Alliance The transition from Animal Welfare League of Arlington to becoming an independent national nonprofit Funding challenges and commitment to providing free or low-cost services to rural communities Success of "Taking the Fear out of Bottle Feeding" course as Maddie's University's top-performing class Why traditional "every two hours" feeding schedules are outdated and discourage potential fosters Creating community connections where kitten programs can support each other nationally The importance of employer partnerships to enable workplace bottle feeding for dedicated fosters Resources mentioned: National Kitten College website (https://www.kittencollege.org/) Email: info@kittencollege.org National Kitten College Facebook page (https://www.facebook.com/p/National-Kitten-College-61558629895690/) Maddie's University online courses (https://university.maddiesfund.org/) Animal Welfare League of Arlington - original program location (https://www.awla.org/) Animal Welfare League of Arlington Facebook page (https://www.facebook.com/AWLArlington/) Humane Rescue Alliance - DC partnership (https://www.humanerescuealliance.org/) Humane Rescue Alliance Facebook page (https://www.facebook.com/humanerescuealliance/) UC Davis Koret Shelter Medicine Program (https://www.shelterlearniverse.com/) University of Florida Shelter Medicine Program (https://sheltermedicine.vetmed.ufl.edu/) National Kitten Coalition (https://kittencoalition.org/) Sponsor Links: Maddie's Fund (https://www.communitycatspodcast.com/maddies623) The Community Cat Clinic (https://www.communitycatspodcast.com/catclinicga) Follow & Review We'd love for you to follow us if you haven't yet. Click that purple '+' in the top right corner of your Apple Podcasts app. We'd love it even more if you could drop a review or 5-star rating over on Apple Podcasts(https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-community-cats-podcast/id1125752101?mt=2). Select “Ratings and Reviews” and “Write a Review” then share a quick line with your favorite part of the episode. It only takes a second and it helps spread the word about the podcast.

This week we are going AWOL and hunting down our old Vietnam buddies while we discuss “Kitten”! We're talking how they really could have come up with a cooler evil-project name than MK NAOMI, that Kersh is back: meaner and balder than ever, how Mulder and Scully's main character disease is really turning terminal, and that Skinner might as well give up entirely about having any career anymore. We admire Skinner's turn on the cover of LL Bean, learn what a petard is, tell Mulder and Scully to get back there and pull Skinner out of that hole, question why Haley Joel Osment is in this, and wonder what exactly is so funny about losing five teeth. Hilarious! Kersh's love language: sending lackeys to do his dirty work.Note: Please send us Season 10 and Season 11 questions by October 12 for our revival wrap-up episode!Send us an email at scullynationpod@gmail.com or follow us on Instagram!

On this episode of Cattitude, host Michelle Fern welcomes Jakob Shaw, Manager of Strategic Initiatives at PETA, to talk about how small everyday actions can help protect wildlife. From raccoons and squirrels to cats and dogs, animals can easily become trapped in common household items like cans, jars, and bottles. Jakob shares practical, humane tips for preventing harm—from properly securing recyclables to using safe deterrents instead of cruel methods like glue traps. Tune in to learn how simple changes in how we manage trash and household pests can make the world safer for our furry and feathered neighbors.EPISODE NOTES: Living in Harmony with Wildlife: Simple Steps You Can TakeBecome a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/cattitude-the-1-cat-podcast--6666768/support.

When you learn about what they do at the entry level of burlesque. From our Fringe episode with Meghan Spencer

Power of Dirndls and Lederhosen: Part 2Hans finds his confidence and the fraulein, too.Based on the post by cb summers, in 2 parts. Listen to the ► Podcast at Connected.PART TWO – October 6, 1992Normally I found it impossible to be spontaneous around hot chicks like this, but something about being in that costume, thinking about my grandfather's irrepressible charm brought out a boldness in me which I didn't normally possess. I put my arm around this hot, blue-eyed fraulein and said, in my worst German accent, “Yah, and dis here is mein liebchen, Helga Boob en schteen.”She corrected me comically, “Not Boob en schteen, Boob en schtein!” Everyone in the entire room laughed themselves silly. Then Helga loudly introduced the girls. “May I introducen mein fellow pledges from ze Tau Nu Upsilon Sorority? Ya, dis here is Gertruda Cock en suck en.”Everyone laughed at her crude pun, but I clicked my heels together very seriously, like a proper Austrian man, and said “Guten abend, Gertruda,” then I bowed and kissed the back of the adorable redhead's soft little hand.Helga went on, pointing to a busty little African American girl, who looked quite stunning in her bright orange dirndl. “And zis here is little Heidi Ho. Yah, she's an actual ho!” I clicked my heels together, and kissed Heidi's hand. “And dis vun here ist Muschi von Kitten licker.” Muschi, who had short black hair and snow-white skin, leaned forward and presented her cheek to me, so I kissed it, laying my lips on the second female of my life. Her skin was as soft as silk.Helga gestured toward a cute blonde with bright pink circles painted on her cheeks, saying, “And, finally, mein beste freunden, Hildegard Fuck me up the ass en stein, the third.” Hildegard laughed, then turned and wiggled her ass at me. I bowed deeply and said, “Very nice to meet you, Herr Fuck me up the ass en stein.” She wiggled her ass again, right in my face, so I leaned down a little farther and kissed her right on her behind, and the crowd went wild. I was surprising the shit out of myself. My grandfather's DNA was having a field day with my confidence. I raised my oversized prop stein, and shouted, “Beer! Ve must haff beer!”Helga had an identical stein, and so we filled them together from the keg and chugged them while everyone clapped, until they were empty. I saw that beer was leaking out of her defective stein and dripping all over her glorious, copper colored cleavage, making her white top wet enough for me to see the lacy blue bra she was wearing under it. Oh shit. I couldn't take my eyes off her tits. She caught me looking, but instead of getting mad, she just looked down at her breasts and said, “Oops. I can be zo clumzy zometimes, liebchen! You know how I am!” She ran her fingers over her soaked cleavage.I don't know what came over me, but I took her wrist in my hand and said, clicking my heels together, “Allow me, fraulein Boob en schtein.” And I wrapped my lips around her fingertips and licked them dry of beer. She just stared at me with the biggest smile on her face, and her eyes twinkling. My god! Who was I?I had no idea what to do next, but some joker saved me by playing a polka on the stereo. Without missing a beat, Helga shouted, “Shall ve dance, mein liebchen?” She didn't even wait for me to answer. She just grabbed my hand and dragged me to the middle of the floor and we started to polka.I'd been to a few polkas when I was a kid, so I knew the basic moves, and a few of the special ones, and I guess Helga had been to a few polkas too, because she kept right up with me. Soon, everyone was clapping and cheering and snapping photographs, and at least ten others, who knew how to polka, joined in, including Heidi Ho! Where a black girl learned to polka is anybody's guess. When the song finally ended, I lifted my stein and shouted the traditional Oktoberfest starting cheer, which for some reason popped to mind even though I thought I'd forgotten it years ago “O' zapft is! The Keg Is Tapped! Let Oktoberfest Begin!”After the ear-splitting cheer, the music switched back to hip hop, and the lights dimmed, and the disco lights began to flash, and soon Helga and I were dancing in the center of a crowd, this time gyrating like fools, just like everyone else on the dance floor. By the third song, I was utterly smitten with her. She had such a bold, fearless spirit, that I just let all of my nerdy inhibitions go, and danced, not caring how stupid I looked, because my eyes were glued to her. Her breasts. Her coppery face. Her stunning, sky-blue eyes. And she was looking right back at me, sometimes smiling, but sometimes with an expression on her face that reminded me of the expression I'd seen on Briona's face while Troy was fucking her. Damn. Helga was giving me sex face! It was unbelievably cool!The third song was a raunchy rap song that was bit that year, Baby Got Back, and suddenly Heidi Ho, Helga's black friend, appeared in front of me and started grinding her ass against my crotch. I'd never danced like this before, but there were other couples doing it, so I put my hands on her hips and grinded away. I started to get a boner, so I turned around, afraid she might feel it. But then Gertruda Cocken sucken, an adorable freckle-faced girl, with vivid red hair, started grinding her ass into my crotch instead, apparently unconcerned about the fact that I was rubbing my erection against her. Or maybe even enjoying it! It was an incredible feeling. Then Heidi put her arms around me from behind, and started grinding her crotch against my ass, and now I was sandwiched between two Bavarian hotties, feeling Heidi's firm tits rubbing all over my back. My mind was now officially blown. But I rolled with it. Why the fuck not? It was Oktoberfest!Midnight in the campus park.Then when that song ended, Hildegard Fuck me up the ass en stein switched with Heidi, and Helga von Boob en schtein switched with Gertruda, and now I was feeling Helga's large, coppery tits flopping back and forth across my back. Hildegard was a bit drunk by this time, so she leaned forward and started rubbing her ass up and down, grinding her pussy against my cock, making it look exactly like I was fucking her. She even started making orgasmic sounds. And I realized that in all likelihood, my cock was actually rubbing against more than just her ass. In fact, it might be rubbing right against her tight little pussy! Shit, this was getting way out of hand! Then I noticed that the older sisters in her sorority were watching us with great amusement. Maybe this was part of their initiation ceremony. But I didn't care. If she wanted to dry hump me in a room full of people, more power to her. She even grabbed my wrists and pulled my hands up to her tits! Oh shit! They weren't all that big, but I could feel the hard lumps of her nipples bouncing under my fingers as I squeezed her little grapefruits.I began to feel the warning signs of an impending orgasm coming on strong. Oh my god, I was going to blow my load feeling the first tits of my life! But at just the last minute, the final girl in Helga's harem, Muschi von Kittenlicker, pushed Hildegard aside, but instead of grinding her ass against mine, she faced me and started gyrating against me in time with Helga behind me. Now two sexy women were rubbing her tits against me, and my cock got enough of a reprieve that my urge to cum faded mercifully away.Muschi's paper pale face was flush with devastating sexiness, but she wasn't looking at me. She was looking past me at Helga. And in spite of how much I was enjoying this once-in-a-lifetime experience, I think I detected pure infatuation in Muschi's expression. She didn't make eye contact with me even once, but she kept licking her lips as if she wanted to kiss someone. I bent toward her, suddenly excited about kissing another girl, but she just shifted to the other side, her eyes staring past me, and looking down at Helga's ample cleavage. Oh shit, she wants to kiss her friend! I turned to look at Helga's beautiful copper colored face in the flashing disco light, but she appeared to be totally unaware of Muschi's lustful looks.The song changed, and now all the Bavarian girls crowded around me and began to rub their bodies and asses, all over me. It was dark, and the lights were flashing, and I had no idea who was who, but my hand definitely squeezed another girl's breast for a few seconds, maybe Heidi Ho's and I also fondled a couple of their asses, running my fingers over their delightful ass-cracks. It was almost like I was in some kind of fully clothed orgy!But then, halfway through the song, a hand grasped mine, and pulled me off the dance floor. It was Helga Boobenschtein. She grinned back at me as she pulled me out the front door, leaving her friends behind, obviously sick of sharing me with them. She wanted me all to herself. That was just fine with me. It was getting pretty weird anyway. Helga and I ran hand in hand through the campus, laughing like lunatics. I suppose the beer had gone to our heads, because we were utterly silly with hilarity. I never was much of a drinker. When we'd run ourselves tired, we sat down on a bench, still holding hands.After she caught her breath, she said in her regular voice, “I lied to you earlier, my name's not really Helga Boobenschtein.”“Ach du lieber! I'm shocked! Is it Boobenschteen after all?”She laughed and said, “No. My real name is Annie Stoltz. And yes, that is a German name.”I dropped the accent and said, “You sure don't look German!”“No, my mother's Brazilian. I got my black hair and dark skin from her. But I learned to polka from my dad. He also gave me these eyes.” Indeed, her eyes were the most amazing baby-blue color I'd ever seen. They almost glowed against her copper colored face.“Well, I have a surprise for you too. I'm not really Helmutt von Wiener. My name is Hans Willis.”Annie laughed, “You have German name too? That's too perfect!”“My grandpa's from Austria, and my grandma from my mother's side is Bavarian.”“Oh my god. What are the odds that two half-Germans would meet at an Oktoberfest party in Illinois, dressed in matching costumes? It's a good thing I don't believe in fate, or I'd say it was fate.”I laughed, “I don't believe in fate, either, but show me the evidence, and I'll be happy to reconsider. But in any large sampling, like life, coincidences are bound to happen. And they have to happen to somebody. In this case, to us.”“Spoken like a true scientist, Hans.”I smiled. But for some reason, I wanted to avoid talking about science. That's what had derailed my date with Briona. So instead I said, “That party was off the hook!”She blushed. “I'm sorry about the girls. They're a bunch of sluts. Except for Muschi, her real name is Barbara. She's a lesbian.”“Yeah. I kinda noticed. And I think she has the hot for you, Annie.”Annie laughed, “I know. I know. I keep telling her I'm not into it, but she just won't give up. But I love her to death. And you enjoyed our little dance, didn't you?”I had no words for how much I'd enjoyed our dance. So I just blushed and smiled.She laughed and squeezed my hand, giving me a strange erotic thrill. Then she said, “I've seen you around the labs. What's your major?”“General science.”She grinned, “Yeah? I might do that too, but I'm just a freshman. I'm taking a bunch of different classes this year until I figure out what my passion is. But it's definitely in the sciences. I love science. I love science. I'm taking this biology class right now, and we're learning all about the…”As she bubbled with enthusiasm about biology, her face absolutely glowed, in spite of her dark skin. She just seemed to radiate a luminosity that filled my heart with a feeling so powerful that I was on the verge of laughter or tears. I had the overpowering urge to tell her how much I loved science too, but remembering how things went with Briona, I did something else instead.I kissed her.It was a sudden impulse, perhaps inspired by Grandpa's mischievous DNA, and I acted on it without getting hung up by my normal crippling uncertainty. I didn't even wait for her to finish her current sentence. I just leaned toward her and planted my lips on hers. She didn't push me away or slap my face. Instead, she threw her arms around me, pulled me closer on the bench, and kissed me back, deeply, passionately, lustfully as if she'd been waiting for this moment her entire life. Her mouth opened and our tongues began to polka. This sweet, funny, brainy girl was a seething well of passion under that fun-loving surface. She was moaning into my mouth in no time at all, clearly enjoying this amazing kiss every bit as much as me.We must have made quite a tableau in our costumes, making out like crazy on a bench in the center of the quad, illuminated by a nearby streetlight. I could hear people walking by, occasionally snickering or making crude comments. But I didn't care. This was my first French kiss, and I had no intention of letting embarrassment cut it short. And the longer we kissed, the more I dialed out the rest of the world, until there was only the two of us, and our tongues, and our lips, and our hearts.Suddenly she turned and straddled me, and I enjoyed the feel of her breasts heaving against my chest. By this time I had a massive erection, so I held her back a bit, to prevent her from feeling it.She started shivering, and said, “My legs are freezing”. I took that as an invitation to help warm them up, so I put my hands on her calves, which were splayed out on the bench on my left and right. Some girls, like Muschi, have baby-soft skin, but not Annie. Her skin felt thick and smooth and was covered with a soft, almost invisible peach fuzz. The feel of her flesh made my cock throb with desire. I'd never felt anything so amazing in my life. It felt like suede leather, only softer and suppler.She began humming happily in my mouth as I rubbed her calves. I moved my hands up higher, my fingers slipping under the edge of her skirt to rub her soft thighs. Then with each stroke of my hands, I went a little higher under her skirt. I expected her to tell me to stop at any moment, but she didn't. Finally my fingertips touched the edge of her panties, and a few strokes later my hands were all the way onto her ass, cheeks, squeezing them through the soft, stretchy cotton of her undies. She giggled, but she didn't make me stop. I loved the feel of her ass wiggling under my hands as she laughed.Then, unexpectedly, she slid forward on my lap, pressing her crotch against my hard on. She gave a lustful little gasp, as did I. I couldn't believe how well this was going! The only thing separating my cock from her pussy was a few thin layers of fabric. It was insanely erotic, and all the while we explored each other's mouths with our tongues, absolutely breathless with passion.We kissed and kissed and kissed in this position for the longest time. The campus clock struck 1, then 2. I couldn't believe we'd been at it for so long. But I knew it couldn't last forever. There were classes tomorrow and we were both dedicated students. So, reluctantly, we pulled back and just looked into each other's eyes for a while. I found that to be ten times more intimate than kissing. For the first time in my life, I could look into a woman's eyes without glancing away nervously after a few seconds. I could look into Annie's baby-blue eyes forever.Carnal Knowledge In the Woods.She said, “Would you care to escort me back to my dorm, liebchen?”“But of course, fraulein.” I was sad when she squirmed off my lap. I had the sinking feeling that this was a one shot deal. In the light of day she'd notice how crooked my teeth were. She'd notice my acne scars and wiry hair. But we walked, hand in hand, like boyfriend and girlfriend, and I started to think, maybe, just maybe, a second date?She led me on a roundabout route, rather than the direct way to her dorm. It took us into the dimly lit park next to Davenport ravine, which was totally deserted. We waded through drifts of fallen leaves. I put my arm around her waist and snuggled her close. My palm was tucked right under her right breast, which would occasionally bounce down against the top of my thumb, giving me an incredible thrill each and every time. I was trembling with lust. I wanted to move my hand higher, but I was afraid of overstepping. But then it occurred to me that Annie was my girl now. I don't know how I knew it, I just did. It gave me the confidence to cup her breast in my hand. She hummed and leaned her head against mine and squeezed my waist tighter. We walked that way for a while. I thrilled at the feel of her soft, squishy boob bouncing playfully in my fingers. I even felt her nipple getting harder against my palm. And the heft of her breast was amazing. The bulge in my lederhosen was pointing straight ahead.I could see the bright windows of her dorm getting closer over the treetops, and I knew this magical night would soon be over. This was a girl's only dorm. Boys weren't allowed in at any time. But she steered me off the path toward a huge thicket of bushes near the center of the park. Then she got down on her hands and knees and said, “Follow me, Hans.” She crawled into a dark opening in the branches, which I'd never noticed before. I followed. It was a dark and thorny little tunnel, but I could see her silhouette ahead of me, and I could hear the thorns scratching at the edges of her skirt. A chill of fear swept through me suddenly. Fear of the unknown, I guess. Fear of dark places.The thorny tunnel took a few twists and turns, but eventually I saw her crawling out into the moonlight ahead of me. She stood up and smiled at me as I climbed out of the tunnel into a small clearing in the center of the giant thicket. I wondered how many people knew about this secret place?We were totally alone. Moonlight twinkled in her eyes and we kissed again. She pulled me close, then pulled me over with her into a pile of leaves that had collected in the center of the clearing. We laughed. I kneeled over her, my legs straddling her thighs. I looked down, mystified by her beautiful moonlit face. She put her hands on her blouse and pulled the front of it down, all the while looking at me with an intensely trusting and intimate expression. She had a thin baby-blue bra under the blouse, through which I could see the dark circles of her areolas.She reached up and pulled my face down into her coppery cleavage, and I breathed in her powdery perfume and kissed her supple skin, in circling motions, hardly believing this was happening, until I was kissing her hard nipple through the thin fabric of her bra. She groaned in pleasure and suddenly pulled the front of her bra down, exposing her moonlit breasts to me. Her areolas were chocolate brown. I took one of her large nipples into my mouth and circled it with my tongue, and bit it lightly with my teeth, making her giggle. This was an absolute dream come true, but it was only getting better with each passing second.As I switched to kissing and licking her other breast, she opened her legs, and I shifted so I was kneeling between them. I lowered myself onto her, pressing my hard-on into her crotch, and began to grind myself against her, softly at first, but with growing urgency. She ran her fingers through my hair, then began to push my head downward. For a second I thought she wanted me to stop licking her boobs, but she kept pushing me down with one hand, while she pulled up her flouncy skirt with the other. Soon my face was inches away from her lacy blue panties. There was a large wet spot in the center of the blue lace. I saw it only for a second before she pulled my face down into her warm wet crotch. I was overwhelmed by the musky moistness of her. I'd caught a whiff of Briona the night she fucked Troy, but now that I was buried in an actual pussy, I took a deep breath of her animalistic aroma. Good grief, I loved it!I grabbed her suede-soft thighs with both hands and began kissing her pussy through the lacy fabric, licking the tender flesh of her labia on either side, which made her moan with delight. I worked my tongue around the edge of the panties, slowly pulling the edge of it inward, exposing more of her tender flesh. I felt her downy black pubic hairs tingling across my tongue. I pulled at them playfully with my lips. She laughed, then groaned. I teased her for a while, licking the left side, then the right, moving ever inward, but not all the way. She twisted about passionately trying to make me go further, but I playfully delayed, as much to entice her as to prolong the moment for me. This was, without doubt, the greatest night of my life, and I wanted it to go on forever. Finally she couldn't wait any longer, so she reached down and pulled her panties all the way open and pulled my face into her warm wet pussy. My nose buried itself in her downy bush, and my tongue slipped between her swollen lips. She tasted incredible.“Oh, liebchen…” she moaned, “that feels so good.”Although this was my first time, I'd listened to Briona's instructions as Troy ate her out, so I had a general idea of what to do. For the next half hour or more I ate Annie's sweet pussy with absolute abandon. I kissed and teased her, and tried to make her squirm and whimper with pleasure. I found I couldn't put my tongue very far into her vagina. There was a thin membrane just an inch inside her pussy lips. It took me a few seconds to realize what it was. Oh shit, that's her hymen! I recognized it from biology class. For some reason, because of her sexual confidence, I'd assumed Annie wasn't a virgin, exactly the opposite mistake I'd made from judging Briona. I chuckled, realizing that I was a terrible judge of things like that. But it didn't matter. I was touched that Annie trusted me to kiss her this way. I was careful not to lick her too vigorously. I knew from biology class that the hymen could be broken accidentally, and I certainly didn't want to be responsible for an unintentional defloration! So I concentrated most of my efforts on her tiny little clitoris. She loved it when I sucked it and swirled it with my tongue.After a while I discovered that her favorite thing was when I rubbed her pussy up and down with my entire face. I'd start with my nose buried between her quivering lips, then slide upward, so my nose and tongue went up her pussy until I could lift the little hood covering her clitoris with the tip of my tongue, and flick that sensitive little nub before making my way back down. I went up and down this way, again and again, starting slowly but building up speed. My face was slick with her copious juices, which thrilled me to no end. She whimpered and gasped and groaned, and started saying, “Oh, god. Oh god. Oh yes. Oh yes…” And then, quite suddenly, her entire body tensed up like crazy, and she closed both of her thighs around my head and held me in a vice grip while she bucked and arched and clenched, squealing with an incredibly powerful orgasm. A splash of warm juices surged out of her pussy onto my face, startling me, and delighting me at the same time.Then I began licking and sucking her dripping wet pussy with gusto, swallowing her juices, and slurping her delicious clit. But after a few seconds of this she started banging my forehead with her palm, apparently too overwhelmed to be able to communicate vocally. I took the hint and left her over-stimulated clit alone. Annie's body remained as stiff as a board, and a deep trembling rolled through her thighs for two solid minutes. Finally she relaxed, and her thighs opened, releasing my head from the vice grip. She just lay there for the longest time, panting hard as if she'd just jogged a mile. I took the opportunity to finally take a good long look at her beautiful pussy in the moonlight. Every woman in the world has one, but Annie's was the first I'd seen this closely. I'd seen Briona's but she was so hairy, I really hadn't been able to make out any details. But Annie's pussy only had a little oval tuft of silky black hair on top, and simple curving chocolate brown lips below, topped with a tiny little nub. I knew right then and there that for the rest of my life, Annie's vagina would be the one I'd judge all others by. It was simply too beautiful for words. An absolute work of art, just like every other square inch of her.I kissed her pussy lips gently this time, savoring the similarity of these lips to her other lips. After a while she tugged at my hair. So I crawled up and snuggled her in the leaves, my leg over her legs to keep them warm in the chilly October air. Slowly she came out of the post orgasmic state she'd been in for the last ten minutes. She looked at me with wide eyes and said, “Hans, I never did that before. That was an orgasm I guess. Wow.”“Yeah, wow!” I said, smiling. We kissed. She backed off and wrinkled her nose in distaste.“Is that what I taste like?”“Delicious.”“If you say so,” she said sardonically.“I do say so. Your pussy, my dear, is ze finest pussy in all ze fatherland. Yah, sweet nectar from Odin…”She kissed me to shut me up. We hugged and kissed sweetly for a long time, shivering against each other, neither of us wanting the night to end.There was a rustling in the bushes. We both tensed and listened intently for more. Was someone else crawling up the tunnel? Fear gripped us, but after a few minutes of deadly silence, I said, “Must have been a branch falling.”“Sorry,” she said, “I get easily spooked.”“I saw a ghost once.” She let this random bit of information sit there in the darkness. A cloud moved over the moon and suddenly we were plunged into pitch darkness. I could only, just barely, make out her sky blue eyes in the inky blackness.“A ghost?”“Yeah.”“There are no such things as ghosts.”She sighed, “Yeah, I know, but I saw one, so, I guess that's stupid, right?”My science brain now switched on, instinctively. “You know, I used to love ghost stories and paranormal stuff. But nobody has ever found scientific evidence that any of that stuff exists, in spite of millions of dollars spent on research, hundreds of independent studies, probably more. In the whole of human history, there's still no conclusive evidence that human consciousness survives death.”“I know. But it hasn't been disproved either.”“You can't prove a negative.”She laughed. “I know, Hans, I know. I told you it's stupid.”“So what's this ghost you saw? Could have been a dream, or a hallucination. They're more common than people think.”“Maybe.” She said. The cloud moved off the moon, and once again I could see her lovely bronze face. I could tell from her expression that she didn't want to tell me more. She'd given me a glimpse of her dark secret, but that was all I was going to get. She could let me lick her pussy, but the ghost story thing was a little too personal. Go figure.Perhaps as a way to change the topic, she rolled over to straddle me. In response my softened cock began to grow again. She looked down at me in the moonlight and said, “You know, Hans, you're quite lovely.”“Handsome, you mean”“Lovely. Handsome men don't wear lederhosen.”I was about to say something funny, but she began to grind herself on my hardening erection. A beautiful, lustful expression came over her sweet face. She inched herself slowly down my body, and I watched her as she unbuttoned the buttons on the front of my lederhosen. There were a lot of them, and it would have been amusing except I was suddenly aware that she intended to touch my cock. I got lightheaded with amazement and lust. One of the great dreams of my life was about to come true, and I tried to commit the sight of Annie unbuttoning me to memory. My underwear-clad cock began to emerge more and more with each button, rising up to her grinning face, eager to meet her, to shake hands, to say hello. She tickled the tip of it playfully, amused at the way it jumped with each touch.“Little Hans wants out. Should I let him?”“Yes Fraulein. Zat would be lovely.” I tried to be funny and cool, but my voice cracked with tension.She pulled the band of my underwear down, and my cock sprang up in front of her face, looking quite impressive in the moonlight, if I may say so myself. Her eyes twinkled at the sight of it. “I stand corrected. Not little Hans. BIG Hans!” I'm glad she'd never seen Troy's cock! Then she touched my cock with her fingers, sending shivers up and down my spine. She began to bat it with her fist, making it bob about playfully. She'd obviously never seen a penis before, because she was utterly fascinated. She stroked it gently, and rolled my furry balls in her fingertips, giggling at the strange feel of me. I was in absolute heaven by this point. And when she leaned down and kissed the underside of my cock with her beautiful lips, my heart skipped a beat. She kissed it again and again, and the more she kissed it, the harder it got, which I didn't even think was possible. Finally she opened her mouth and the tip slipped between her warm, wet lips. I felt her teeth, her lips, her tongue, but mostly I saw. Really, it was the sight of her mouth, her beautiful, rosy mouth, wrapped around this most intimate part of me, which made my heart do loop-de-loops.She tongued me and kissed me and sucked me in a variety of ways. It was her turn now to experiment, and I loved every minute of it. After a while she unbuttoned my suspenders and pulled the shorts down, without bothering to take my boots off. She spread my thighs open and licked my furry balls, taking them into her mouth, while stroking my turgid shaft with her soft fingers. She was clumsy and inexperienced, but I didn't know better. It was perfect as far as I was concerned. I just laid back and let her service me, amazed at how much she got into it. She kept looking up at me with her baby blue eyes as she slobbered all over my cock, which was truly mind-blowing. I'd daydreamed about blowjobs for years, but the reality was so much better. I mean, this was literally one of the most beautiful women I'd ever seen in my life, and she was sucking my cock. It was beyond wonderful. It was life altering.After only a few minutes of her wonderful mouth bobbing up and down on my cock, I began to feel the telltale signs of impending orgasm. “Oh shit, Annie, I'm gonna cum if you keep that up.”She looked up at me and said, “I want to feel you cum in my mouth, Hans. Is that okay?”I nodded, dazed with excitement. Then she sucked and slurped, putting her limber neck into it, and rolling my balls with her fingertips. The underside of my cock became so sensitive that I could feel every taste bud on her magical tongue. Then I felt a hot burst in my nuts, and I began to buck and writhe with the most incredible orgasm I'd ever felt. She kept sucking and jerking as I shot my seed into her mouth. Her cheeks quickly became distended, and cum began to ooze past her lips down my cock. Then I saw her gulping, and I realized she was actually swallowing my cum.I didn't get soft for a second, so she just swallowed and kept on sucking. Sure, my cock was so sensitive by this time that it almost felt painful being in her mouth, but I put up with the pain because I didn't want it to end. I had no idea when or if I'd ever get another blowjob. Happily I got over the hypersensitivity after a few minutes, and she continued to suck and slurp for another ten or fifteen minutes until I thought I was probably on the verge of cumming again.But then Annie suddenly sat up and grabbed her purse. My heart sank. I was certain she was going to check her watch and say it was time to go home. But instead she pulled out a little wrapper and clumsily tore it open. My head nearly exploded when I realized what she was doing. I'd totally forgotten to bring my condom with me. Thank God Annie was more organized than me. She tried to put it on my cock, but it was too dark to see that she was putting it on inside out. We both laughed as she yanked the stretchy rubber on my throbbing shaft. It was so hilarious that it almost took my mind off what was about to happen.Eventually she got the condom over about half my phallus, and said, “Well, that's as good as it gets, I guess!” Then she stepped out of her panties and squatted over me. I reached up and our fingers interlocked. I was filled with the most amazing love for Annie as she lowered her muff onto my pole. Then before I knew it, I felt the head of my scepter pushing against the tender flesh of her hymen. She paused, our eyes locked on each other. We both knew this was an important moment and should be savored. Then she lowered herself, with a deep groan, and popped her cherry on me. She slid all the way down with a throaty gasp, until I was totally immersed in her tight pussy. She sat there for a minute or two, and we looked at each other smiling. It was over. We were no longer virgins.“High five.” I said.We high-fived each other, smiling like crazy.I was thrilled with the thought that half of my cock, the part uncovered by the condom, was touching the inside of her sweet tunnel. She slowly lifted herself, then lowered herself. She was so tight around me, I might as well not have been wearing a condom. It was incredible.She moaned, “Oh fuck, Hans. You feel so big. Oh god. Oh god. What a great cock. Thank you. Thank you for this, Hans.”I was actually fucking a gorgeous half-Brazilian hottie in a pile of leaves, and she was actually thanking me. I looked up at her in wonder. The moonlight was glinting on her dark, shiny braids. As she slowly lifted herself up again her gorgeous lips opened to emit a moan of transcendent pleasure. I was moved more than words can convey.I blurted, “I love you.” Her blue eyes opened wide, and for a moment I was worried that I'd made a mistake. But then she began to pump her body up and down on me with crazy abandon, her eyes locked to mine, as she gave off beautiful, throaty moans.“Oh, oh, oh. You feel so good inside me. Oh yeah. So good. Goddamned fucking fantastic! Oh Yeah! Yeah! Yeah!” Soon she was pounding herself on me faster, making the leaves rustle and bounce into the air. I reached up and yanked the front of her bra down, releasing her large brown breasts again. They looked amazing, bobbing and bouncing in the moonlight with those dark brown areolas flying up and down in a blur. Then I began to arch my pelvis in rhythm with her movements, rising up to meet her with each downstroke. The bare skin of our pelvises began slapping wetly together again and again. She was so wet, I could feel her juices dripping down my balls.Suddenly, a sharp, spine-tingling, high-pitched groan came from the bushes to our left. We froze in primal fear. I felt every hair on my headstand erect, and Annie's pussy tightened like a clamp around my shaft. After a few moments of silence, the bushes rustled, as if something was moving slowly around the edge of the clearing. It groaned again, weirder this time, sounding almost human, but I was certain it had to be an animal. Annie's face was contorted in terror. She pulled off me, and plopped to her hands and knees.She whispered desperately, “Come on. Fuck me Hans. Hurry up.”I couldn't believe she wanted to keep going. I wanted to run. As a matter of fact, I was scared shitless. But there she was, kneeling with her skirt bundled up, exposing her beautiful brown ass to the moonlight. I kneeled behind her and slowly slid my cock into her tight, trembling canal, while she looked at the bushes, following the eerie rustling sounds with her head. Man, oh, man, her hips felt good in my hands, and her pussy felt incredible around my cock. I began to pound her hard and fast, trying to work her up to another quivering orgasm. I felt myself building up to one too, but I was able to put it off longer than I normally could have, because my abdomen was clenched into a tight little fist of fear. But after thirty, forty, fifty strokes, she let out a little choking gasp, and warm juices surged out of her all around my shaft, splashing loudly into the leaves between her knees.At the moment of her climax a huge black flying thing burst out of the edge of the clearing and flew right at us then up out of sight making us both Scream! Right then I began to ejaculate, spurred on by fear and the shivering, quivering spasms that were rolling through her pussy and thighs. My orgasm seemed to go on and on for minutes, as I continued thrusting and squirting shot after shot into that wonderful girl. Or, into the condom, I should say.When my spasms finally ended, I pulled out of her and plopped into the leaves next to her. She crawled on top of me and whispered into my ear, “I love you too. Now let's get the hell out of here.”I yanked the fully loaded condom from my penis, and tossed it into the leaves, then we dressed hastily, laughing like idiots, and crawled in terror through the tunnel. Then we sprinted breathlessly, hand in hand through the park to her dorm. We didn't look back until we got through the doors in the foyer. I swear, it felt as something was chasing us the whole way, but when we turned to look out the glass doors, nothing was there but the cold October dawn. The sky was glowing with the first rays of morning light. We laughed and breathlessly talked about what an amazing night we'd had! But what the hell was that thing? We agreed it must have been a bird. What else could it have been?Only then did we realize that she'd bled a bit from her broken hymen. The brown crotch of my lederhosen had splashes of dark crimson, and her flowery skirt and white stockings were spattered too. But we both laughed, happy that the lobby was deserted at this hour. We held onto each other in the foyer until the morning sun broke over the treetops, casting October orange light on her bronze face, and filling her blue eyes with wonder. She was even more stunning than ever. We stood up and I kissed her goodnight, or good morning I guess. But before she went inside, I haltingly said, “Uh, do you think, that you'd like to, uh, go out with me again?”She smiled as if I'd just asked her the dumbest question in the world. “I'm your girlfriend, stupid.”My heart soared. I have a girlfriend!by CBSummers, for Literotica 

Power of Dirndls and Lederhosen: Part 2Hans finds his confidence and the fraulein, too.Based on the post by cb summers, in 2 parts. Listen to the ► Podcast at Connected.PART TWO – October 6, 1992Normally I found it impossible to be spontaneous around hot chicks like this, but something about being in that costume, thinking about my grandfather's irrepressible charm brought out a boldness in me which I didn't normally possess. I put my arm around this hot, blue-eyed fraulein and said, in my worst German accent, “Yah, and dis here is mein liebchen, Helga Boob en schteen.”She corrected me comically, “Not Boob en schteen, Boob en schtein!” Everyone in the entire room laughed themselves silly. Then Helga loudly introduced the girls. “May I introducen mein fellow pledges from ze Tau Nu Upsilon Sorority? Ya, dis here is Gertruda Cock en suck en.”Everyone laughed at her crude pun, but I clicked my heels together very seriously, like a proper Austrian man, and said “Guten abend, Gertruda,” then I bowed and kissed the back of the adorable redhead's soft little hand.Helga went on, pointing to a busty little African American girl, who looked quite stunning in her bright orange dirndl. “And zis here is little Heidi Ho. Yah, she's an actual ho!” I clicked my heels together, and kissed Heidi's hand. “And dis vun here ist Muschi von Kitten licker.” Muschi, who had short black hair and snow-white skin, leaned forward and presented her cheek to me, so I kissed it, laying my lips on the second female of my life. Her skin was as soft as silk.Helga gestured toward a cute blonde with bright pink circles painted on her cheeks, saying, “And, finally, mein beste freunden, Hildegard Fuck me up the ass en stein, the third.” Hildegard laughed, then turned and wiggled her ass at me. I bowed deeply and said, “Very nice to meet you, Herr Fuck me up the ass en stein.” She wiggled her ass again, right in my face, so I leaned down a little farther and kissed her right on her behind, and the crowd went wild. I was surprising the shit out of myself. My grandfather's DNA was having a field day with my confidence. I raised my oversized prop stein, and shouted, “Beer! Ve must haff beer!”Helga had an identical stein, and so we filled them together from the keg and chugged them while everyone clapped, until they were empty. I saw that beer was leaking out of her defective stein and dripping all over her glorious, copper colored cleavage, making her white top wet enough for me to see the lacy blue bra she was wearing under it. Oh shit. I couldn't take my eyes off her tits. She caught me looking, but instead of getting mad, she just looked down at her breasts and said, “Oops. I can be zo clumzy zometimes, liebchen! You know how I am!” She ran her fingers over her soaked cleavage.I don't know what came over me, but I took her wrist in my hand and said, clicking my heels together, “Allow me, fraulein Boob en schtein.” And I wrapped my lips around her fingertips and licked them dry of beer. She just stared at me with the biggest smile on her face, and her eyes twinkling. My god! Who was I?I had no idea what to do next, but some joker saved me by playing a polka on the stereo. Without missing a beat, Helga shouted, “Shall ve dance, mein liebchen?” She didn't even wait for me to answer. She just grabbed my hand and dragged me to the middle of the floor and we started to polka.I'd been to a few polkas when I was a kid, so I knew the basic moves, and a few of the special ones, and I guess Helga had been to a few polkas too, because she kept right up with me. Soon, everyone was clapping and cheering and snapping photographs, and at least ten others, who knew how to polka, joined in, including Heidi Ho! Where a black girl learned to polka is anybody's guess. When the song finally ended, I lifted my stein and shouted the traditional Oktoberfest starting cheer, which for some reason popped to mind even though I thought I'd forgotten it years ago “O' zapft is! The Keg Is Tapped! Let Oktoberfest Begin!”After the ear-splitting cheer, the music switched back to hip hop, and the lights dimmed, and the disco lights began to flash, and soon Helga and I were dancing in the center of a crowd, this time gyrating like fools, just like everyone else on the dance floor. By the third song, I was utterly smitten with her. She had such a bold, fearless spirit, that I just let all of my nerdy inhibitions go, and danced, not caring how stupid I looked, because my eyes were glued to her. Her breasts. Her coppery face. Her stunning, sky-blue eyes. And she was looking right back at me, sometimes smiling, but sometimes with an expression on her face that reminded me of the expression I'd seen on Briona's face while Troy was fucking her. Damn. Helga was giving me sex face! It was unbelievably cool!The third song was a raunchy rap song that was bit that year, Baby Got Back, and suddenly Heidi Ho, Helga's black friend, appeared in front of me and started grinding her ass against my crotch. I'd never danced like this before, but there were other couples doing it, so I put my hands on her hips and grinded away. I started to get a boner, so I turned around, afraid she might feel it. But then Gertruda Cocken sucken, an adorable freckle-faced girl, with vivid red hair, started grinding her ass into my crotch instead, apparently unconcerned about the fact that I was rubbing my erection against her. Or maybe even enjoying it! It was an incredible feeling. Then Heidi put her arms around me from behind, and started grinding her crotch against my ass, and now I was sandwiched between two Bavarian hotties, feeling Heidi's firm tits rubbing all over my back. My mind was now officially blown. But I rolled with it. Why the fuck not? It was Oktoberfest!Midnight in the campus park.Then when that song ended, Hildegard Fuck me up the ass en stein switched with Heidi, and Helga von Boob en schtein switched with Gertruda, and now I was feeling Helga's large, coppery tits flopping back and forth across my back. Hildegard was a bit drunk by this time, so she leaned forward and started rubbing her ass up and down, grinding her pussy against my cock, making it look exactly like I was fucking her. She even started making orgasmic sounds. And I realized that in all likelihood, my cock was actually rubbing against more than just her ass. In fact, it might be rubbing right against her tight little pussy! Shit, this was getting way out of hand! Then I noticed that the older sisters in her sorority were watching us with great amusement. Maybe this was part of their initiation ceremony. But I didn't care. If she wanted to dry hump me in a room full of people, more power to her. She even grabbed my wrists and pulled my hands up to her tits! Oh shit! They weren't all that big, but I could feel the hard lumps of her nipples bouncing under my fingers as I squeezed her little grapefruits.I began to feel the warning signs of an impending orgasm coming on strong. Oh my god, I was going to blow my load feeling the first tits of my life! But at just the last minute, the final girl in Helga's harem, Muschi von Kittenlicker, pushed Hildegard aside, but instead of grinding her ass against mine, she faced me and started gyrating against me in time with Helga behind me. Now two sexy women were rubbing her tits against me, and my cock got enough of a reprieve that my urge to cum faded mercifully away.Muschi's paper pale face was flush with devastating sexiness, but she wasn't looking at me. She was looking past me at Helga. And in spite of how much I was enjoying this once-in-a-lifetime experience, I think I detected pure infatuation in Muschi's expression. She didn't make eye contact with me even once, but she kept licking her lips as if she wanted to kiss someone. I bent toward her, suddenly excited about kissing another girl, but she just shifted to the other side, her eyes staring past me, and looking down at Helga's ample cleavage. Oh shit, she wants to kiss her friend! I turned to look at Helga's beautiful copper colored face in the flashing disco light, but she appeared to be totally unaware of Muschi's lustful looks.The song changed, and now all the Bavarian girls crowded around me and began to rub their bodies and asses, all over me. It was dark, and the lights were flashing, and I had no idea who was who, but my hand definitely squeezed another girl's breast for a few seconds, maybe Heidi Ho's and I also fondled a couple of their asses, running my fingers over their delightful ass-cracks. It was almost like I was in some kind of fully clothed orgy!But then, halfway through the song, a hand grasped mine, and pulled me off the dance floor. It was Helga Boobenschtein. She grinned back at me as she pulled me out the front door, leaving her friends behind, obviously sick of sharing me with them. She wanted me all to herself. That was just fine with me. It was getting pretty weird anyway. Helga and I ran hand in hand through the campus, laughing like lunatics. I suppose the beer had gone to our heads, because we were utterly silly with hilarity. I never was much of a drinker. When we'd run ourselves tired, we sat down on a bench, still holding hands.After she caught her breath, she said in her regular voice, “I lied to you earlier, my name's not really Helga Boobenschtein.”“Ach du lieber! I'm shocked! Is it Boobenschteen after all?”She laughed and said, “No. My real name is Annie Stoltz. And yes, that is a German name.”I dropped the accent and said, “You sure don't look German!”“No, my mother's Brazilian. I got my black hair and dark skin from her. But I learned to polka from my dad. He also gave me these eyes.” Indeed, her eyes were the most amazing baby-blue color I'd ever seen. They almost glowed against her copper colored face.“Well, I have a surprise for you too. I'm not really Helmutt von Wiener. My name is Hans Willis.”Annie laughed, “You have German name too? That's too perfect!”“My grandpa's from Austria, and my grandma from my mother's side is Bavarian.”“Oh my god. What are the odds that two half-Germans would meet at an Oktoberfest party in Illinois, dressed in matching costumes? It's a good thing I don't believe in fate, or I'd say it was fate.”I laughed, “I don't believe in fate, either, but show me the evidence, and I'll be happy to reconsider. But in any large sampling, like life, coincidences are bound to happen. And they have to happen to somebody. In this case, to us.”“Spoken like a true scientist, Hans.”I smiled. But for some reason, I wanted to avoid talking about science. That's what had derailed my date with Briona. So instead I said, “That party was off the hook!”She blushed. “I'm sorry about the girls. They're a bunch of sluts. Except for Muschi, her real name is Barbara. She's a lesbian.”“Yeah. I kinda noticed. And I think she has the hot for you, Annie.”Annie laughed, “I know. I know. I keep telling her I'm not into it, but she just won't give up. But I love her to death. And you enjoyed our little dance, didn't you?”I had no words for how much I'd enjoyed our dance. So I just blushed and smiled.She laughed and squeezed my hand, giving me a strange erotic thrill. Then she said, “I've seen you around the labs. What's your major?”“General science.”She grinned, “Yeah? I might do that too, but I'm just a freshman. I'm taking a bunch of different classes this year until I figure out what my passion is. But it's definitely in the sciences. I love science. I love science. I'm taking this biology class right now, and we're learning all about the…”As she bubbled with enthusiasm about biology, her face absolutely glowed, in spite of her dark skin. She just seemed to radiate a luminosity that filled my heart with a feeling so powerful that I was on the verge of laughter or tears. I had the overpowering urge to tell her how much I loved science too, but remembering how things went with Briona, I did something else instead.I kissed her.It was a sudden impulse, perhaps inspired by Grandpa's mischievous DNA, and I acted on it without getting hung up by my normal crippling uncertainty. I didn't even wait for her to finish her current sentence. I just leaned toward her and planted my lips on hers. She didn't push me away or slap my face. Instead, she threw her arms around me, pulled me closer on the bench, and kissed me back, deeply, passionately, lustfully as if she'd been waiting for this moment her entire life. Her mouth opened and our tongues began to polka. This sweet, funny, brainy girl was a seething well of passion under that fun-loving surface. She was moaning into my mouth in no time at all, clearly enjoying this amazing kiss every bit as much as me.We must have made quite a tableau in our costumes, making out like crazy on a bench in the center of the quad, illuminated by a nearby streetlight. I could hear people walking by, occasionally snickering or making crude comments. But I didn't care. This was my first French kiss, and I had no intention of letting embarrassment cut it short. And the longer we kissed, the more I dialed out the rest of the world, until there was only the two of us, and our tongues, and our lips, and our hearts.Suddenly she turned and straddled me, and I enjoyed the feel of her breasts heaving against my chest. By this time I had a massive erection, so I held her back a bit, to prevent her from feeling it.She started shivering, and said, “My legs are freezing”. I took that as an invitation to help warm them up, so I put my hands on her calves, which were splayed out on the bench on my left and right. Some girls, like Muschi, have baby-soft skin, but not Annie. Her skin felt thick and smooth and was covered with a soft, almost invisible peach fuzz. The feel of her flesh made my cock throb with desire. I'd never felt anything so amazing in my life. It felt like suede leather, only softer and suppler.She began humming happily in my mouth as I rubbed her calves. I moved my hands up higher, my fingers slipping under the edge of her skirt to rub her soft thighs. Then with each stroke of my hands, I went a little higher under her skirt. I expected her to tell me to stop at any moment, but she didn't. Finally my fingertips touched the edge of her panties, and a few strokes later my hands were all the way onto her ass, cheeks, squeezing them through the soft, stretchy cotton of her undies. She giggled, but she didn't make me stop. I loved the feel of her ass wiggling under my hands as she laughed.Then, unexpectedly, she slid forward on my lap, pressing her crotch against my hard on. She gave a lustful little gasp, as did I. I couldn't believe how well this was going! The only thing separating my cock from her pussy was a few thin layers of fabric. It was insanely erotic, and all the while we explored each other's mouths with our tongues, absolutely breathless with passion.We kissed and kissed and kissed in this position for the longest time. The campus clock struck 1, then 2. I couldn't believe we'd been at it for so long. But I knew it couldn't last forever. There were classes tomorrow and we were both dedicated students. So, reluctantly, we pulled back and just looked into each other's eyes for a while. I found that to be ten times more intimate than kissing. For the first time in my life, I could look into a woman's eyes without glancing away nervously after a few seconds. I could look into Annie's baby-blue eyes forever.Carnal Knowledge In the Woods.She said, “Would you care to escort me back to my dorm, liebchen?”“But of course, fraulein.” I was sad when she squirmed off my lap. I had the sinking feeling that this was a one shot deal. In the light of day she'd notice how crooked my teeth were. She'd notice my acne scars and wiry hair. But we walked, hand in hand, like boyfriend and girlfriend, and I started to think, maybe, just maybe, a second date?She led me on a roundabout route, rather than the direct way to her dorm. It took us into the dimly lit park next to Davenport ravine, which was totally deserted. We waded through drifts of fallen leaves. I put my arm around her waist and snuggled her close. My palm was tucked right under her right breast, which would occasionally bounce down against the top of my thumb, giving me an incredible thrill each and every time. I was trembling with lust. I wanted to move my hand higher, but I was afraid of overstepping. But then it occurred to me that Annie was my girl now. I don't know how I knew it, I just did. It gave me the confidence to cup her breast in my hand. She hummed and leaned her head against mine and squeezed my waist tighter. We walked that way for a while. I thrilled at the feel of her soft, squishy boob bouncing playfully in my fingers. I even felt her nipple getting harder against my palm. And the heft of her breast was amazing. The bulge in my lederhosen was pointing straight ahead.I could see the bright windows of her dorm getting closer over the treetops, and I knew this magical night would soon be over. This was a girl's only dorm. Boys weren't allowed in at any time. But she steered me off the path toward a huge thicket of bushes near the center of the park. Then she got down on her hands and knees and said, “Follow me, Hans.” She crawled into a dark opening in the branches, which I'd never noticed before. I followed. It was a dark and thorny little tunnel, but I could see her silhouette ahead of me, and I could hear the thorns scratching at the edges of her skirt. A chill of fear swept through me suddenly. Fear of the unknown, I guess. Fear of dark places.The thorny tunnel took a few twists and turns, but eventually I saw her crawling out into the moonlight ahead of me. She stood up and smiled at me as I climbed out of the tunnel into a small clearing in the center of the giant thicket. I wondered how many people knew about this secret place?We were totally alone. Moonlight twinkled in her eyes and we kissed again. She pulled me close, then pulled me over with her into a pile of leaves that had collected in the center of the clearing. We laughed. I kneeled over her, my legs straddling her thighs. I looked down, mystified by her beautiful moonlit face. She put her hands on her blouse and pulled the front of it down, all the while looking at me with an intensely trusting and intimate expression. She had a thin baby-blue bra under the blouse, through which I could see the dark circles of her areolas.She reached up and pulled my face down into her coppery cleavage, and I breathed in her powdery perfume and kissed her supple skin, in circling motions, hardly believing this was happening, until I was kissing her hard nipple through the thin fabric of her bra. She groaned in pleasure and suddenly pulled the front of her bra down, exposing her moonlit breasts to me. Her areolas were chocolate brown. I took one of her large nipples into my mouth and circled it with my tongue, and bit it lightly with my teeth, making her giggle. This was an absolute dream come true, but it was only getting better with each passing second.As I switched to kissing and licking her other breast, she opened her legs, and I shifted so I was kneeling between them. I lowered myself onto her, pressing my hard-on into her crotch, and began to grind myself against her, softly at first, but with growing urgency. She ran her fingers through my hair, then began to push my head downward. For a second I thought she wanted me to stop licking her boobs, but she kept pushing me down with one hand, while she pulled up her flouncy skirt with the other. Soon my face was inches away from her lacy blue panties. There was a large wet spot in the center of the blue lace. I saw it only for a second before she pulled my face down into her warm wet crotch. I was overwhelmed by the musky moistness of her. I'd caught a whiff of Briona the night she fucked Troy, but now that I was buried in an actual pussy, I took a deep breath of her animalistic aroma. Good grief, I loved it!I grabbed her suede-soft thighs with both hands and began kissing her pussy through the lacy fabric, licking the tender flesh of her labia on either side, which made her moan with delight. I worked my tongue around the edge of the panties, slowly pulling the edge of it inward, exposing more of her tender flesh. I felt her downy black pubic hairs tingling across my tongue. I pulled at them playfully with my lips. She laughed, then groaned. I teased her for a while, licking the left side, then the right, moving ever inward, but not all the way. She twisted about passionately trying to make me go further, but I playfully delayed, as much to entice her as to prolong the moment for me. This was, without doubt, the greatest night of my life, and I wanted it to go on forever. Finally she couldn't wait any longer, so she reached down and pulled her panties all the way open and pulled my face into her warm wet pussy. My nose buried itself in her downy bush, and my tongue slipped between her swollen lips. She tasted incredible.“Oh, liebchen…” she moaned, “that feels so good.”Although this was my first time, I'd listened to Briona's instructions as Troy ate her out, so I had a general idea of what to do. For the next half hour or more I ate Annie's sweet pussy with absolute abandon. I kissed and teased her, and tried to make her squirm and whimper with pleasure. I found I couldn't put my tongue very far into her vagina. There was a thin membrane just an inch inside her pussy lips. It took me a few seconds to realize what it was. Oh shit, that's her hymen! I recognized it from biology class. For some reason, because of her sexual confidence, I'd assumed Annie wasn't a virgin, exactly the opposite mistake I'd made from judging Briona. I chuckled, realizing that I was a terrible judge of things like that. But it didn't matter. I was touched that Annie trusted me to kiss her this way. I was careful not to lick her too vigorously. I knew from biology class that the hymen could be broken accidentally, and I certainly didn't want to be responsible for an unintentional defloration! So I concentrated most of my efforts on her tiny little clitoris. She loved it when I sucked it and swirled it with my tongue.After a while I discovered that her favorite thing was when I rubbed her pussy up and down with my entire face. I'd start with my nose buried between her quivering lips, then slide upward, so my nose and tongue went up her pussy until I could lift the little hood covering her clitoris with the tip of my tongue, and flick that sensitive little nub before making my way back down. I went up and down this way, again and again, starting slowly but building up speed. My face was slick with her copious juices, which thrilled me to no end. She whimpered and gasped and groaned, and started saying, “Oh, god. Oh god. Oh yes. Oh yes…” And then, quite suddenly, her entire body tensed up like crazy, and she closed both of her thighs around my head and held me in a vice grip while she bucked and arched and clenched, squealing with an incredibly powerful orgasm. A splash of warm juices surged out of her pussy onto my face, startling me, and delighting me at the same time.Then I began licking and sucking her dripping wet pussy with gusto, swallowing her juices, and slurping her delicious clit. But after a few seconds of this she started banging my forehead with her palm, apparently too overwhelmed to be able to communicate vocally. I took the hint and left her over-stimulated clit alone. Annie's body remained as stiff as a board, and a deep trembling rolled through her thighs for two solid minutes. Finally she relaxed, and her thighs opened, releasing my head from the vice grip. She just lay there for the longest time, panting hard as if she'd just jogged a mile. I took the opportunity to finally take a good long look at her beautiful pussy in the moonlight. Every woman in the world has one, but Annie's was the first I'd seen this closely. I'd seen Briona's but she was so hairy, I really hadn't been able to make out any details. But Annie's pussy only had a little oval tuft of silky black hair on top, and simple curving chocolate brown lips below, topped with a tiny little nub. I knew right then and there that for the rest of my life, Annie's vagina would be the one I'd judge all others by. It was simply too beautiful for words. An absolute work of art, just like every other square inch of her.I kissed her pussy lips gently this time, savoring the similarity of these lips to her other lips. After a while she tugged at my hair. So I crawled up and snuggled her in the leaves, my leg over her legs to keep them warm in the chilly October air. Slowly she came out of the post orgasmic state she'd been in for the last ten minutes. She looked at me with wide eyes and said, “Hans, I never did that before. That was an orgasm I guess. Wow.”“Yeah, wow!” I said, smiling. We kissed. She backed off and wrinkled her nose in distaste.“Is that what I taste like?”“Delicious.”“If you say so,” she said sardonically.“I do say so. Your pussy, my dear, is ze finest pussy in all ze fatherland. Yah, sweet nectar from Odin…”She kissed me to shut me up. We hugged and kissed sweetly for a long time, shivering against each other, neither of us wanting the night to end.There was a rustling in the bushes. We both tensed and listened intently for more. Was someone else crawling up the tunnel? Fear gripped us, but after a few minutes of deadly silence, I said, “Must have been a branch falling.”“Sorry,” she said, “I get easily spooked.”“I saw a ghost once.” She let this random bit of information sit there in the darkness. A cloud moved over the moon and suddenly we were plunged into pitch darkness. I could only, just barely, make out her sky blue eyes in the inky blackness.“A ghost?”“Yeah.”“There are no such things as ghosts.”She sighed, “Yeah, I know, but I saw one, so, I guess that's stupid, right?”My science brain now switched on, instinctively. “You know, I used to love ghost stories and paranormal stuff. But nobody has ever found scientific evidence that any of that stuff exists, in spite of millions of dollars spent on research, hundreds of independent studies, probably more. In the whole of human history, there's still no conclusive evidence that human consciousness survives death.”“I know. But it hasn't been disproved either.”“You can't prove a negative.”She laughed. “I know, Hans, I know. I told you it's stupid.”“So what's this ghost you saw? Could have been a dream, or a hallucination. They're more common than people think.”“Maybe.” She said. The cloud moved off the moon, and once again I could see her lovely bronze face. I could tell from her expression that she didn't want to tell me more. She'd given me a glimpse of her dark secret, but that was all I was going to get. She could let me lick her pussy, but the ghost story thing was a little too personal. Go figure.Perhaps as a way to change the topic, she rolled over to straddle me. In response my softened cock began to grow again. She looked down at me in the moonlight and said, “You know, Hans, you're quite lovely.”“Handsome, you mean”“Lovely. Handsome men don't wear lederhosen.”I was about to say something funny, but she began to grind herself on my hardening erection. A beautiful, lustful expression came over her sweet face. She inched herself slowly down my body, and I watched her as she unbuttoned the buttons on the front of my lederhosen. There were a lot of them, and it would have been amusing except I was suddenly aware that she intended to touch my cock. I got lightheaded with amazement and lust. One of the great dreams of my life was about to come true, and I tried to commit the sight of Annie unbuttoning me to memory. My underwear-clad cock began to emerge more and more with each button, rising up to her grinning face, eager to meet her, to shake hands, to say hello. She tickled the tip of it playfully, amused at the way it jumped with each touch.“Little Hans wants out. Should I let him?”“Yes Fraulein. Zat would be lovely.” I tried to be funny and cool, but my voice cracked with tension.She pulled the band of my underwear down, and my cock sprang up in front of her face, looking quite impressive in the moonlight, if I may say so myself. Her eyes twinkled at the sight of it. “I stand corrected. Not little Hans. BIG Hans!” I'm glad she'd never seen Troy's cock! Then she touched my cock with her fingers, sending shivers up and down my spine. She began to bat it with her fist, making it bob about playfully. She'd obviously never seen a penis before, because she was utterly fascinated. She stroked it gently, and rolled my furry balls in her fingertips, giggling at the strange feel of me. I was in absolute heaven by this point. And when she leaned down and kissed the underside of my cock with her beautiful lips, my heart skipped a beat. She kissed it again and again, and the more she kissed it, the harder it got, which I didn't even think was possible. Finally she opened her mouth and the tip slipped between her warm, wet lips. I felt her teeth, her lips, her tongue, but mostly I saw. Really, it was the sight of her mouth, her beautiful, rosy mouth, wrapped around this most intimate part of me, which made my heart do loop-de-loops.She tongued me and kissed me and sucked me in a variety of ways. It was her turn now to experiment, and I loved every minute of it. After a while she unbuttoned my suspenders and pulled the shorts down, without bothering to take my boots off. She spread my thighs open and licked my furry balls, taking them into her mouth, while stroking my turgid shaft with her soft fingers. She was clumsy and inexperienced, but I didn't know better. It was perfect as far as I was concerned. I just laid back and let her service me, amazed at how much she got into it. She kept looking up at me with her baby blue eyes as she slobbered all over my cock, which was truly mind-blowing. I'd daydreamed about blowjobs for years, but the reality was so much better. I mean, this was literally one of the most beautiful women I'd ever seen in my life, and she was sucking my cock. It was beyond wonderful. It was life altering.After only a few minutes of her wonderful mouth bobbing up and down on my cock, I began to feel the telltale signs of impending orgasm. “Oh shit, Annie, I'm gonna cum if you keep that up.”She looked up at me and said, “I want to feel you cum in my mouth, Hans. Is that okay?”I nodded, dazed with excitement. Then she sucked and slurped, putting her limber neck into it, and rolling my balls with her fingertips. The underside of my cock became so sensitive that I could feel every taste bud on her magical tongue. Then I felt a hot burst in my nuts, and I began to buck and writhe with the most incredible orgasm I'd ever felt. She kept sucking and jerking as I shot my seed into her mouth. Her cheeks quickly became distended, and cum began to ooze past her lips down my cock. Then I saw her gulping, and I realized she was actually swallowing my cum.I didn't get soft for a second, so she just swallowed and kept on sucking. Sure, my cock was so sensitive by this time that it almost felt painful being in her mouth, but I put up with the pain because I didn't want it to end. I had no idea when or if I'd ever get another blowjob. Happily I got over the hypersensitivity after a few minutes, and she continued to suck and slurp for another ten or fifteen minutes until I thought I was probably on the verge of cumming again.But then Annie suddenly sat up and grabbed her purse. My heart sank. I was certain she was going to check her watch and say it was time to go home. But instead she pulled out a little wrapper and clumsily tore it open. My head nearly exploded when I realized what she was doing. I'd totally forgotten to bring my condom with me. Thank God Annie was more organized than me. She tried to put it on my cock, but it was too dark to see that she was putting it on inside out. We both laughed as she yanked the stretchy rubber on my throbbing shaft. It was so hilarious that it almost took my mind off what was about to happen.Eventually she got the condom over about half my phallus, and said, “Well, that's as good as it gets, I guess!” Then she stepped out of her panties and squatted over me. I reached up and our fingers interlocked. I was filled with the most amazing love for Annie as she lowered her muff onto my pole. Then before I knew it, I felt the head of my scepter pushing against the tender flesh of her hymen. She paused, our eyes locked on each other. We both knew this was an important moment and should be savored. Then she lowered herself, with a deep groan, and popped her cherry on me. She slid all the way down with a throaty gasp, until I was totally immersed in her tight pussy. She sat there for a minute or two, and we looked at each other smiling. It was over. We were no longer virgins.“High five.” I said.We high-fived each other, smiling like crazy.I was thrilled with the thought that half of my cock, the part uncovered by the condom, was touching the inside of her sweet tunnel. She slowly lifted herself, then lowered herself. She was so tight around me, I might as well not have been wearing a condom. It was incredible.She moaned, “Oh fuck, Hans. You feel so big. Oh god. Oh god. What a great cock. Thank you. Thank you for this, Hans.”I was actually fucking a gorgeous half-Brazilian hottie in a pile of leaves, and she was actually thanking me. I looked up at her in wonder. The moonlight was glinting on her dark, shiny braids. As she slowly lifted herself up again her gorgeous lips opened to emit a moan of transcendent pleasure. I was moved more than words can convey.I blurted, “I love you.” Her blue eyes opened wide, and for a moment I was worried that I'd made a mistake. But then she began to pump her body up and down on me with crazy abandon, her eyes locked to mine, as she gave off beautiful, throaty moans.“Oh, oh, oh. You feel so good inside me. Oh yeah. So good. Goddamned fucking fantastic! Oh Yeah! Yeah! Yeah!” Soon she was pounding herself on me faster, making the leaves rustle and bounce into the air. I reached up and yanked the front of her bra down, releasing her large brown breasts again. They looked amazing, bobbing and bouncing in the moonlight with those dark brown areolas flying up and down in a blur. Then I began to arch my pelvis in rhythm with her movements, rising up to meet her with each downstroke. The bare skin of our pelvises began slapping wetly together again and again. She was so wet, I could feel her juices dripping down my balls.Suddenly, a sharp, spine-tingling, high-pitched groan came from the bushes to our left. We froze in primal fear. I felt every hair on my headstand erect, and Annie's pussy tightened like a clamp around my shaft. After a few moments of silence, the bushes rustled, as if something was moving slowly around the edge of the clearing. It groaned again, weirder this time, sounding almost human, but I was certain it had to be an animal. Annie's face was contorted in terror. She pulled off me, and plopped to her hands and knees.She whispered desperately, “Come on. Fuck me Hans. Hurry up.”I couldn't believe she wanted to keep going. I wanted to run. As a matter of fact, I was scared shitless. But there she was, kneeling with her skirt bundled up, exposing her beautiful brown ass to the moonlight. I kneeled behind her and slowly slid my cock into her tight, trembling canal, while she looked at the bushes, following the eerie rustling sounds with her head. Man, oh, man, her hips felt good in my hands, and her pussy felt incredible around my cock. I began to pound her hard and fast, trying to work her up to another quivering orgasm. I felt myself building up to one too, but I was able to put it off longer than I normally could have, because my abdomen was clenched into a tight little fist of fear. But after thirty, forty, fifty strokes, she let out a little choking gasp, and warm juices surged out of her all around my shaft, splashing loudly into the leaves between her knees.At the moment of her climax a huge black flying thing burst out of the edge of the clearing and flew right at us then up out of sight making us both Scream! Right then I began to ejaculate, spurred on by fear and the shivering, quivering spasms that were rolling through her pussy and thighs. My orgasm seemed to go on and on for minutes, as I continued thrusting and squirting shot after shot into that wonderful girl. Or, into the condom, I should say.When my spasms finally ended, I pulled out of her and plopped into the leaves next to her. She crawled on top of me and whispered into my ear, “I love you too. Now let's get the hell out of here.”I yanked the fully loaded condom from my penis, and tossed it into the leaves, then we dressed hastily, laughing like idiots, and crawled in terror through the tunnel. Then we sprinted breathlessly, hand in hand through the park to her dorm. We didn't look back until we got through the doors in the foyer. I swear, it felt as something was chasing us the whole way, but when we turned to look out the glass doors, nothing was there but the cold October dawn. The sky was glowing with the first rays of morning light. We laughed and breathlessly talked about what an amazing night we'd had! But what the hell was that thing? We agreed it must have been a bird. What else could it have been?Only then did we realize that she'd bled a bit from her broken hymen. The brown crotch of my lederhosen had splashes of dark crimson, and her flowery skirt and white stockings were spattered too. But we both laughed, happy that the lobby was deserted at this hour. We held onto each other in the foyer until the morning sun broke over the treetops, casting October orange light on her bronze face, and filling her blue eyes with wonder. She was even more stunning than ever. We stood up and I kissed her goodnight, or good morning I guess. But before she went inside, I haltingly said, “Uh, do you think, that you'd like to, uh, go out with me again?”She smiled as if I'd just asked her the dumbest question in the world. “I'm your girlfriend, stupid.”My heart soared. I have a girlfriend!by CBSummers, for Literotica 

Dating a cat person but sneezing through the sparks? On this episode of Cattitude, Michelle Fern welcomes Nick Lachey (98 Degrees; host of Love Is Blind, The Ultimatum, Perfect Match) and Dr. Michelle Moyal, veterinarian with Purina, for a lively, love-forward conversation about navigating relationships when cat allergies enter the chat. Nick shares why he teamed up on the new “Live Clear, Love Clear” video series and his own perspective on keeping romance alive when one partner's eyes won't stop watering, while Dr. Moyal breaks down the science behind Purina ONE LiveClear—how it helps neutralize the Fel d 1 allergen at the source (the cat's mouth!) and what real couples are experiencing by day 21. From first-date sneeze fails to practical tips for blending cats and couples, this episode is equal parts heart and hairballs… minus the sniffles.EPISODE NOTES: Swipe Right on Cats: Nick Lachey on Dating with AllergiesBecome a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/cattitude-the-1-cat-podcast--6666768/support.

I want to search the internet, find what I need get offline. But they won't let me!! They tempt me with pretty pictures and cat videos. Laugh as I try to figure this all out!

In this episode, Dr. Kat interviews renowned veterinary behaviorist Dr. Lisa Radosta to discuss storm anxiety in cats—a common but often overlooked issue. Dr. Radosta shares insights into why some cats develop storm phobias while others remain calm and how pet owners can recognize the subtle signs of anxiety. The conversation covers practical strategies for preparing cats before a storm, including creating safe spaces, using pheromone therapy, and incorporating Fear Free techniques. Dr. Radosta also explores the effectiveness of environmental management, medications, and supplements. Dr. Radosta also shares real-life success stories and discusses recent advancements in behavioral management. Whether you're a veterinarian or a cat owner, this episode provides valuable, actionable tips to help your feline friends feel safer during storms.EPISODE NOTES: Managing Storm StressBecome a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/nine-lives-with-dr-kat-cat-podcasts-for-cat-lovers-pet-life-radio-original--6667999/support.

The Truth is in Here... Welcome back to THE X-CAST: AN X-FILES PODCAST as we continue our coverage of Season 11. Sarah Blair is joined by Clara Cook & J. J. Lendl to discuss 11x06, 'Kitten', unpacking the episode and discussing your feedback... Host / Editor / Co-Producer Sarah Blair Guests Clara Cook / J. J. Lendl Co-Producers Kurt North / Carl Sweeney Executive Producer Tony Black Support The X-Cast on Patreon: www.patreon.com/thexcast Follow X-Cast on social media: Twitter: @TheX_Cast Facebook/Instagram: The X-Cast Support the Film Stories podcast network on Patreon: ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.patreon.com/simonbrew⁠⁠⁠⁠ Twitter: @filmstories Facebook/Instagram/Threads: Film Stories Website: www.filmstories.co.uk With thanks to our Patrons: Cathy Glinski, Michelle Milbauer, Deana Ferreri, RH, Katie Doe, Cortlan Waters Bartley, Martha Payne, Caredwen Foley, Calla Dreams, Karen McKenna, Luke Winch, Ferdinando Bianchini, Adam Chamberlain, Charnette Soto, Simon Hodgson, Gillian Collins, Nina, Ellie, Kathy Wait, Nikole Wilson-Ripsom, Jonas Wilstrup, Nicole Baker, Adam Vangsness, Gabe Sicliano, Nicole Hayes, Valena, Andrew Begg. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week on Cattitude, Michelle Fern welcomes cartoonist and writer Thom Zahler, best known for his work on My Little Pony comics and the hit series Love and Capes. Thom introduces his brand-new comic, The Ghost Whiskerers, published by John Carpenter's Storm King Comics. Inspired by his real-life feline duo, Mal and Halloween, this spooky-yet-heartwarming adventure takes listeners into a world where cats battle the supernatural! Thom shares behind-the-scenes stories of bringing his cats to life on the page, why felines make such purr-fect comic book stars, and how The Ghost Whiskerers blends humor, heart, and a touch of ghostly fun for cat lovers of all ages.EPISODE NOTES: The Ghost Whiskerers: Cats, Comics & the Supernatural!Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/cattitude-the-1-cat-podcast--6666768/support.

A kitten somehow got up inside the inner workings of a Range Rover and survived highway speeds and heat for hours until a mechanic freed it. After 7 HOURS. STORY: https://www.wdjx.com/kitten-survives-100-mile-trip-stuck-under-an-suv/

Fun Uncle Dylan strikes again! It's well known that Dylan gifted Pepper's daughter their cat, Hiccup, years ago without any permission. Pepper was frustrated at first but has grown to love that cat. Dylan did it again. This time, he surprised Pepper's fiancé and step daughter with another adorable kitten. Pepper doesn't know how to feel about this second lifelong commitment.

Today I have the pleasure of interviewing Dr. Ezra J. Ameis, DVM. Located in Los Angeles, CA, Dr. Ezra opened his veterinary practice, Paw Priority, with the goal of offering both Urgent Care and General Practice with a personal touch. Most veterinarian offices today are owned or being bought by large corporations, which often values serving a large quantity of patience over care giving care with compassion. It's often hard to get the same veterinarian for all appointments, too, which mean continuity of care for the pets they see is often lost, sometimes leading to misdiagnosis. Tune in and listen as Dr. Ezra explains how his veterinarian practice focuses on pet care in a compassionate setting. His clinic, is “dedicated to delivering the highest standard of medical care that your pet rightfully deserves”. As a bonus, we'll also be discussing how Acupuncture for our pets has changed many pets' lives for the better.EPISODE NOTES: Breaking the Corporate Mold: A Vet Who Puts Pets First Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/19-cats-and-counting-on-pet-life-radio-petliferadio-com--6667858/support.

2025 SHORTLIST of BEST in BOOKSThursday Comics #241from the Library of Graphic LiteratureAugust 21st, 2025Welcome to  Thursday Comics issue #241 and the sweet megapixies of comic book media, Wallace Ryan and Dennis Osbourne!!!In this episode, we present to you the first ever, 2025 SHORTLIST of BEST in BOOKS from Thursday Comics!!! A lively discussion of some of the best in collected editions of comics for 2025!!!DID WE MISS ANYTHING?Thursday Comics theme by Bill BrennanNO AI USED in the production of Thursday Comics where you get REAL writers, artists and creators.TOO GOOD for AI!!!Thursday Comics does not give any outside party from scanning our podcasts. We charge $10,000 a podcast to be scanned by AI.#thursdaycomics #comicbooks #graphic novels #omnibus #confessions #bookreviews #graphicnovelreviewsTHURSDAY COMICS Mailbox (Send us your comments)

We hit the gas and get one of the best episodes of the season. Malvo is a dentist, Molly is making inroads, and Gus is thankfully not really present! We talk about: Final Fantasy 8 and 9, Game Remakes And Graphics, CRTs, Lockpicking Luke, Predator 2, Power Washer Simulator Shrek, Warframe, Thief, Tongue Model, Casual Anti-Semitism, Elevator Kills, Lester's Second Wife, Malvo Fucks Up A Family, Lou's Coffee, A Talk About Guests, Pregnancy Timeline, Lester Is So Evil, Predictions, Malvo Is Above The Convenience Store, Dentist Visits,

Dave tells Jenn about visiting his parents and being mauled by their kitten. 

In Episode 851 of The LOTS Project Morning Show, I share updates from the past week, including:How our new kitten Dolly is integrating with the dogsBaby steps forward on the cabin build (and a run-in at Lowe's checkout)A cayenne pepper overload and Kori's homemade hot sauceA road trip game of “What's the Capital?”My windshield washer fluid conspiracy theoryAnd even a few reflections on McDonald's and the story behind Ray Kroc☕ Coffee of the Day: Light Costa Rican from FoodForestFarms.com — use code LOTS10 for 10% off + free shipping.

This week on Cattitude, Michelle Fern chats with Georgette Blau from On Location Tours about their latest purr-fect creation — And Just Like Cat! Inspired by Sex and the City's Carrie Bradshaw, this hilarious parody series reimagines the Manhattan world of love, friendship, and fabulous fashion… all through the eyes of a witty, opinionated feline. Georgette shares behind-the-scenes stories, cat-punned adventures, and how the series ties into their famous Sex and the City Hotspots Tour. If you've ever wondered what SATC would be like with whiskers, catnip, and a little cattitude — this is your episode!EPISODE NOTES: And Just Like Cat… Manhattan Gets Meow-nificentBecome a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/cattitude-the-1-cat-podcast--6666768/support.

Hey there, you look lost kitten, and I'm very good at taking care of lost little things. From savory turkey legs to sweet candied apples, let me lead you through a whirlwind of enchantment and care at the renaissance faire. Ready for an adventure that promises warmth and a potential forever home with me?

As cat owners, we all want to give our feline friends the best life possible. We're careful about the food, treats, and toys we choose to keep them happy and healthy. But what about their teeth? Dental health is one area that often gets overlooked, and trust me, I've been guilty of that myself! So today, I'm super excited to chat with Dr. Greg Reinhart, Chief Scientific Officer at Pet Honesty, to dive into how we can keep our cats' teeth and gums in tip-top shape. Let's get those kitty smiles sparkling! EPISODE NOTES: Feline Dental Health Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/19-cats-and-counting-on-pet-life-radio-petliferadio-com--6667858/support.

This week on Cattitude, Michelle Fern chats cats with the purr-fectly fascinating Vanessa Morgan — feline photographer, horror author, and founder of the wildly popular blog, Traveling Cats. For over 20 years, Vanessa has documented cats from around the globe, turning ordinary travel photos into a captivating cat-centric visual diary. What began as a fun side project became the largest online collection of cat travel photography and a go-to resource for cat-loving adventurers. Vanessa shares her journey of feline discovery, cultural cat differences, and her love of horror films (yes, she even wrote Meow! Cats in Horror, Sci-Fi, and Fantasy Movies). Get ready for a whirlwind of whiskers, wanderlust, and a little spooky fun!EPISODE NOTES: Traveling Cats & Spooky Chats with Vanessa MorganBecome a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/cattitude-the-1-cat-podcast--6666768/support.

In this powerful and heartfelt episode, Dr. Kat sits down with Howard Baskin, treasurer and board member of Big Cat Rescue, to explore the past, present, and future of one of the world's most influential big cat sanctuaries. Howard shares the personal journey that led him to become a passionate advocate for captive wild cats and gives listeners a behind-the-scenes look at Big Cat Rescue's decades-long mission to end private ownership and cub petting. The conversation highlights the monumental passage of the Big Cat Public Safety Act in 2022 and the organization's subsequent decision to relocate its remaining cats to a larger sanctuary. Howard talks candidly about what's next for the organization as it transitions from direct rescue to national advocacy and sanctuary support. We explore some of the hundreds of areas of impact that Big Cat Rescue supports now, making the world a better place for wild cats and people. Listeners will leave inspired, informed, and empowered to take action for wild cats—and people. EPISODE NOTES: Saving Wild Cats: A Conversation with Howard BaskinBecome a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/nine-lives-with-dr-kat-cat-podcasts-for-cat-lovers-pet-life-radio-original--6667999/support.

This week on Cattitude, host Michelle Fern welcomes Tori Fugate, Director of Communications for Shelter Animals Count, to talk about the peak of kitten season and what new national data is revealing about the influx of feline intakes across shelters. Tori shares critical insights from 2024's shelter data showing how kitten intakes (0–8 weeks old) surge in May, followed by a boom of juvenile cats in June and July. This seasonal trend puts enormous pressure on animal shelters, making it vital for rescues to proactively plan for fosters, staffing, medical care, and community support. Learn how this data helps shelters better prepare, save lives, and support these most vulnerable feline arrivals—and what you can do to help!EPISODE NOTES: Kitten Tsunami: Why Kitten Season Floods Shelters with FelinesBecome a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/cattitude-the-1-cat-podcast--6666768/support.

Sink into ultimate comfort with the soothing sounds of a content kitten purring gently beside a warm, crackling fireplace. This unique soundscape is your perfect companion for unwinding after a long day, drifting into peaceful sleep, or finding a moment of calm focus.Love the Relaxing Sounds Podcast? Subscribe now for exclusive access to 4-hour ad-free episodes, perfect for deep sleep, meditation, and focus. Your support helps us continue creating the soothing soundscapes you enjoy. Join our community here: ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/david-sherry/subscribe⁠⁠⁠⁠orTo help support the podcast and get your own personal Ad Free copy of any of our episodes for a small donation please visit ⁠⁠⁠⁠www.albaaudio.com⁠⁠⁠⁠  where you can browse the sound library and purchase your favourite.Listening with headphones is recommended for a fully immersive experience.For enquiries contact : relaxingsoundspodcast@gmail.comRelaxing sounds for yoga, help to sleep, mindfulness, meditation, focus, calming, zen, soothing babies & children and help focus in work.⁠⁠⁠Support the show⁠⁠⁠ (https://albaaudio.bandcamp.com/) "Fireplace Cave Hotel" & "Kitten Purring Sleeping" by Freetousesounds is licensed under a ⁠⁠Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 Unported License⁠⁠. Source: https://freetousesounds.bandcamp.com/

In this informative episode of Cattitude, host Michelle Fern welcomes veterinarian and fellow Pet Life Radio host Dr. Jeff Werber to tackle a condition many cat parents have never heard of—megacolon. Inspired by listener Erin and her beloved cat Rosebud, this episode dives into what megacolon really is, why it happens, and how to recognize and manage this serious feline health issue. Dr. Jeff shares his expert insight on how cats, known for being stoic and secretive about their ailments, can suffer in silence—making awareness and early diagnosis crucial. Whether you've heard the term before or it's completely new to you, this episode is packed with must-know info for every cat lover.EPISODE NOTES: Megacolon in Cats: What Every Cat Parent Needs to KnowBecome a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/cattitude-the-1-cat-podcast--6666768/support.

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Matt is back from an 1,100 mile drive in the Lexus LC500 and has notes; Zack talks about the lawsuit against Toyota regarding its hydrogen cars (something he knows all too much about); some kittens get rescued; and questions from our Patreon members include: What has better steering feel than a Porsche?Best car to take your dad for exciting ridesThoughts on Lexus' new halo carWhy do some models remain icons for decades while others fade away?Our opinion of the GNXWhy you don't supercharge a C4 CorvetteSmall 4x4 to replace my Miata?I need a cheap, cool, warm-weather convertible And more! Recorded June 23, 2025 https://www.theautopian.com/toyota-is-being-sued-by-hundreds-of-mirai-owners-because-owning-a-hydrogen-powered-car-is-just-awful/ DeleteMeTake control of your data and keep your private life private by signing up for DeleteMe. Now at a special discount for our listeners. Get 20% off your DeleteMe plan when you go to joindeleteme.com/TIREand use promo code TIRE at checkout.  HelloFreshMake your summer enjoyable and delicious by signing up for HelloFresh at https://www.hellofresh.com/smokingtire10fm and get TEN FREE MEALS with a FREE ITEM FOR LIFE. SmallsFor a limited time only, because you are a Smoking Tire listener, you can get 60% off your first order of Smalls PLUS free shipping by using my code TIRE.  FitBodJoin Fitbod today to get your personalized workout plan.Get 25% off your subscription or try the app FREE for seven days at Fitbod.me/TIRE. New merch! Grab a shirt or hoodie and support us! https://thesmokingtireshop.com/ Use Off The Record! and ALWAYS fight your tickets! For a 10% discount on your first case go to https://www.offtherecord.com/TST Want your question answered? Want to watch the live stream, get ad-free podcasts, or exclusive podcasts? Join our Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/thesmokingtirepodcast Instagram:https://www.Instagram.com/thesmokingtirehttps://www.Instagram.com/therealzackklapman Want your question answered? Want to watch the live stream, get ad-free podcasts, or exclusive podcasts? Join our Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/thesmokingtirepodcast Use Off The Record! and ALWAYS fight your tickets! Enter code TST10 for a 10% discount on your first case on the Off The Record app, or go to http://www.offtherecord.com/TST. Watch our car reviews: https://www.youtube.com/thesmokingtire Tweet at us!https://www.Twitter.com/thesmokingtirehttps://www.Twitter.com/zackklapman Instagram:https://www.Instagram.com/thesmokingtirehttps://www.Instagram.com/therealzackklapman

In this episode with Elan Lee, you’ll get a behind-the-scenes look at one of the most creative minds in the world of game design—and walk away with some unexpected life lessons along the way. You’ll hear how Elan went from crafting movie special effects and pioneering the Xbox to co-creating Exploding Kittens, a wildly successful card game that started with nothing more than a Sharpie and a deck of poker cards on a beach in Hawaii. Whether you’re a parent looking for better ways to connect with your kids, a creative chasing your next big idea, or just someone who loves a good origin story with a dose of humor and heart, you won't want to miss this conversation. Full show notes: https://bengreenfieldlife.com/elanlee Episode Sponsors: RoXiva: Experience the world-class RX1 lamp—an immersive, multisensory tool designed to transport you into deeper, expanded states of awareness through meticulously crafted light and sound journeys. Get yours now by going to roXiva.com/ben! Calroy: Head on over to calroy.com/ben and save over $50 when you purchase the Vascanox (a breakthrough product providing nitric oxide support for up to 24 hours with a single dose) and Arterosil (a premier supplement to support the endothelial glycocalyx—the fragile inner lining of the entire vascular system) bundle at calroy.com/ben. Plus, you'll receive a free canister of 2-in-1 Nitric Oxide Test Strips with a 3-pack bundle purchase. LeelaQ: Not only do LeelaQ’s products neutralize EMFs, increase ATP production, optimize HRV, and improve blood flow, but they've been third-party proven to do so in placebo-controlled double-blind studies. Visit leelaq.com/ben and use code BEN10 for 10% off. Ketone-IQ: Ketones are a uniquely powerful macronutrient that can cross the blood-brain barrier and increase brain energy and efficiency. With a daily dose of Ketone-IQ, you'll notice a radical boost in focus, endurance, and performance. Save 30% off your first subscription order of Ketone-IQ at Ketone.com/BENG. Prolon: Prolon's 5-Day Fasting Nutrition Program is scientifically tested and patented to nourish your body while keeping it in a physiological fasted state. Right now, you can save 15% on your 5-day nutrition program when you go to prolonlife.com/GREENFIELD.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.