Courage Within You with Silvia Turon

Hello, my brave soul. The time has come when I decided to say goodbye to podcasting for a while and focus on my writing instead.  First, let me start by saying that I am beyond grateful for you, my dear listener who found my podcast helpful while always coming back for more.  Although the journey of podcasting has been deeply rewarding for me, I decided to direct my attention to something I love the most - writing.  Therefore, every Tuesday, I will publish blog posts with tools, tips, techniques, affirmations, quotes, and a little bit of storytelling to support you on your path of deep inner healing and growth. Also, stay on the lookout for some beautiful and healing meditations.  Another reason why I decided to take a break from podcasting is a realization I recently had.  The truth is that, for a while, I let the doubt get the best of me.  Although I wanted to write my second book, I thought to myself:  Who am I to write a book?  No one will want to read it.  Or my all-time favorite: “I am not ready.” It took a couple of months of solitude and looking within. I decided to confront my negative beliefs and break free from these self-imposed limitations.  I am beyond excited to embark on this journey for the second time and pour my heart and soul into my second book, and I can't wait for you to read it.  Thank you again for being a part of this beautiful and fulfilling journey, and as I always say at the end of my podcast, I will talk to you soon.  Stay brave. 

A while ago, I watched an interview with Jay Shetty where he talked about detachment as stated in the Bhagavad Gita, a 700-verse Hindu scripture. He says that, “detachment is not that you own nothing. Detachment is that nothing owns you.” I find this one of the most accurate and simply understood definitions of detachment.  Also, it is worth noticing things and people we are attached to and then asking ourselves:” What does this person, thing, or achievement represent for me?”  It wasn't long ago when I was attached to men who came into my life to validate how lovable I was. Or using the attachment to my work and to-do list to justify my worth. If I worked my butt off, I was worthy. If I took a break, I felt guilty for not doing, and worse, being enough.  We often hear about detachment as an act of letting go. However, this episode isn't about letting go but rather understanding duality, attachment to our preferences, things, and people that drive our emotions, and how to use the art of detachment to create and maintain emotional balance. Here is a glance at this episode… [02:05] Different types of detachment and how they show up in your life.  [03:47] Why do we attach to other people, results in our work and business, or how many things we get done on our to-do list and use it to justify our worth?  [07:50] Understanding the role of duality when it comes to attachment and how reframing from duality supports self-regulation.  [11:06] Seeing things for what they are, detaching from our preferences and opinions while creating more emotional balance.  [13:15] Sharing a part of chapter 4 from the Bhagavad Gita that talks about detaching from the results of our actions, eliminating suffering, and becoming free.   

Healing and walking a spiritual path doesn't mean you don't face challenges or that this path is linear. Therefore, having spiritual tools in place is important to keep evoking the love within while shedding off anything that doesn't serve you.  Love is your ultimate superpower. It gives you the courage to take the brave step, softens your heart, and shows you what you are worth.  I always looked at growth from two different angles.  You either grow by life itself when things you don't ask for or don't expect come into your life and challenge you to grow. The second is intentional growth. It means that you take into your own hands what needs to be addressed without waiting for life events to do it for you.  In both cases, you need spiritual tools to support, regulate, and empower you.  In today's episode, I teach you two powerful spiritual tools to regulate your nervous system, improve heart coherence, and bring more love and kindness into your space while releasing stuck emotions and energy that don't serve you.  Here is a glance at this episode… [00:38] What was my past idea of a “good life”, how did my perception change, and why do I deeply value balance and my mind being in a state of equilibrium.  [03:02] Recognizing how these spiritual tools help activate the parasympathetic nervous system responsible for relaxation and basic understanding of the autonomic nervous system.  [04:56] Using spiritual tools to regulate your thoughts and emotions and how they contribute to emotional restoration and healing. [06:08] What is heart rate variability, and how does heart coherence support better mood and improve the immune system?   [09:30] How these simple spiritual tools bring forth heartfelt emotions, help you feel relaxed and calm, support heart coherence, and release negative energy. 

When I found myself having Monday blues last week, this was the mindfulness tool I used to snap out of it while reminding myself of the true nature of my mind.  There aren't Monday blues, bad or good days, or happy Sundays (as people call it in America).  The quality of our days, regardless of what day it is or what is happening around us depends on how aware we are and how well we manage our thoughts and emotions.  This simple mindfulness tool is your internal resource available at all times and in any situation. Because paying attention to reality, to what is - is an art of self-regulation that's not talked about.   Often, we get stuck in our imagination. We either ruminate on our past or indulge in the vision of the future that doesn't exist.  Often, these visions aren't compelling, inspiring, or uplifting.  In this episode, I will teach you a simple mindfulness tool to help you train your mind for the present while embracing the truth - this moment is all you ever have.  When you learn to differentiate between what is here and now and what is only your imagination or inner critic acting up, you'll become the master in regulating your thoughts and emotions.    Here is a glance at this episode… [00:45] How I found myself in my head having Monday blues while observing my critic in full force. [03:14] How to use your awareness and attention as a mindfulness tool to regulate your thoughts and emotions. [06:07] An exercise I do with my clients to show them how to change their emotional state. [08:25] How to effectively use this mindfulness tool regardless of where you are or what is happening around you.  [10:21] How to handle your mind if it rebels against the new ways of thinking and feeling while effectively applying this mindfulness tool to your life.  

Although healing childhood trauma is a challenging path to walk, it is also a path of deep fulfillment and self-love.  When we become brave enough to look at our past and address earlier childhood experiences holding us back, we choose our destiny instead of settling for it. I've been healing my childhood trauma for a few years now. And although I have made significant progress, I still find myself emotionally relapsing while feeling paralyzed by fear and unease.  It is one of the reasons why I decided to record this episode and shine more light on what healing childhood trauma has been for me, how it shows up in my life and the lives of my clients, and what are the tools available to us to support us on this path.  If you ever doubt whether healing your childhood trauma is possible, know that there are support systems, modalities, tools, and techniques that are available to you to make this process a healing experience.  In this episode, I will share my journey while healing childhood trauma, why it is impacting us today, and what we can do to cope with it in a powerful and effective way.  Here is a glance at this episode… [01:49] The importance of honoring your emotions and why we need to pay attention to subtler negative experiences from our childhood which are easily overlooked.  [03:55] Healing my childhood trauma and handling emotional relapse.  [12:25] How memory without emotional charge becomes the wisdom that leads us forward.  [15:55] The importance of seeking help when healing childhood trauma and the available options.  [18:47] How yoga and meditation affected my process of healing childhood trauma and a personal practice I exercise daily.  [25:48] Using the inner child's work as a powerful modality while healing childhood trauma.  Disclaimer: This podcast episode is not intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, psychotherapist, psychologist, or other qualified professional, diagnosis, or treatment. Please do not disregard or delay in obtaining medical advice for any medical or mental health condition. If you feel you need professional help, seek it. 

You can rewire your brain, change how you think and perceive life, and become in love with it by consciously choosing how you want to think.  The moment you are born, your conscious mind isn't formed yet, while the subconscious mind is fully open. Therefore, whatever you hear, see, experience, and perceive from that point gets stored in your subconscious.  That's where your mood, attitude, and personality form and then, often unconsciously, direct your life to this point.  However, many things you learn and adapt to aren't serving you. Therefore, to change the way you think and feel, you must learn to rewire your brain.  What do I mean by rewiring?  When you think a thought, something called a “neuropathway” is formed in your brain. The more you repeat this thought or behavior, the more this neuropathway strengthens.  But what if you are repeating negative or self-defeating thoughts and behaviors?  We can refer to this as an unconscious process of thinking.  The good news is that we can make it a conscious one. Instead of letting your thoughts run on autopilot, you can rewire your brain by consciously choosing what you want to think.  As Carl Jung said, “Until you make unconscious conscious, it will direct your life, and you will call it fate.”  Life isn't based on fate or some prewritten destiny that's out of your hands. By consciously choosing who you want to be, and how you want to live and then actively working towards that goal - you can craft your destiny.  After listening to this episode, you will have a clear understanding of what shaped you into the person you are today and why you may find it hard to change. You will also learn how to rewire your brain with a simple, yet effective 3-step process.  Here is a glance at this episode… [01:30] A science-based understanding that explains how we create habitual ways of thinking and feeling. Understanding how you wire and then rewire your brain.  [04:42] How to consciously create new neuropathways and rewire your brain through a simple 3-step process.  [05:25] What is required of you to successfully apply this 3-step formula, and how to handle your mind when it rebels against your new way of thinking.  [09:42] How to use forgiveness and compassion as a support when working on your mindset and changing the habitual ways of thinking and feeling.  [16:05] How to use questions to rewire your brain and change negative thinking patterns by reframing them. 

Since we tell ourselves affirmations all day, why not make them into positive affirmations that allow us to become who we want to be and attract things we want?  There are two types of affirmations: conscious and unconscious.  Unconscious affirmations are thoughts and beliefs that run on autopilot. Since we reinforce these statements in our minds many times, they become automatic. Often those are thoughts we don't want to have but aren't aware we have them.  Conscious affirmations are positive affirmations we choose. Think of them as thoughts you choose to think that produce emotions you want to feel.  In this episode, I will lead you through the process of creating positive affirmations, carefully selecting the right ones for you, and beginning to practice them.  However, there is one more component that solidifies this process, and that's visualization. When we say or think our affirmations and then visualize and feel that statement, we enter the realm of a possibility that goes beyond the logical mind.  Positive affirmations serve as a tool to change your subconscious thoughts and beliefs, while visualization brings up the emotional state that feels as if you are already that person or have that thing that you think about and visualize.  Here is a glance at this episode… [00:52] Difference between conscious and unconscious affirmations and how we shaped who we are through positive affirmations [05:28] How to create new beliefs about yourself and the world around you by creating new thinking patterns through conscious affirmations.  [08:20] How to create positive affirmations and a few things to keep in mind to make this process as powerful as you can.  ]14:04] Using visualization as a way to empower your affirmations. And how it changes your emotional and energetical state to a higher frequency. 

Healing your inner child is about accessing the wounds or suppressed emotions while recognizing what parts of you need to be healed. It's also about identifying different parts or versions of your little self and then healing them individually. You may have a version of your inner child that's angry, one that feels unworthy, untrusting, or insecure. Attuning to each of them, giving them attention, validating their feelings, and loving them through it all is where deep healing happens. As children, we adapt different coping mechanisms. Since our brain is still developing when we form these behavioral patterns, they aren't often the most beneficial. This is when, as adults, we begin observing patterns that we have but want to change. Healing your inner child is about reparenting and reconnecting with disowned parts of yourself while learning and applying ways of thinking, feeling, and acting that support your well-being.  In this episode, I will teach you how to identify different parts of your inner child that need healing. I will give you 4 questions that represent 4 steps to take when using inner child work as a way to heal. At the end of the episode, we will take a few minutes to do a simple guided meditation practice to heal your inner child. Once you listen to the episode, you can get the full version of this meditation here. Here is a glance at this episode… [02:04] Why is inner child work so empowering, and how does it help you to heal your past [04:57] How to recognize different versions of your inner child and understand the experiences that shaped her [07:54] The importance of healing the inner child through self-compassion and recognizing coping mechanisms you develop due to past experiences [09:04] 4 questions to ask your inner child [13:18] A simple, short guided meditation practice for reconnecting and healing the inner child

Are you stuck on your healing path? Do you feel you've tried almost everything, but nothing quite works? Today, I am sharing my 3 most powerful spiritual practices that I used and continue using every day to heal and keep myself in balance.  Daily spiritual practices are essential for anyone on a healing path. When we have a practice in place and stay committed to it, what we are saying is “I love me to take care of me.”  Developing spiritual practices that work and coming back to them daily became a ritual that I can't go without. It is like taking a shower or brushing my teeth.  There is something that is called neuroplasticity. Neuroplasticity is “the ability of the nervous system to change its activity in response to intrinsic or extrinsic stimuli by reorganizing its structure, functions, or connections.” In simpler words, by exercising different spiritual practices, you are “molding” your brain into becoming a person who takes care of her mental and emotional health. For example, if you used to binge-watch a show every day but now you do your spiritual practices instead, you are training your mind to develop healthier habits and perceive yourself as a healthier person.  In this episode, I talk about 3 spiritual practices I use daily to manage my mind, regulate my emotions, and break limiting thinking patterns. These spiritual practices keep me in balance and support me on my path to healing and personal growth.  Here is a glance at this episode… [00:40] How my spiritual practices became a roadmap to my healing and helped me in breaking the generational narrative.  [01:38] Addressing what is spirituality and why it has nothing to do with religion and what it actually means to be spiritual.  [05:07] How silence and solitude embraced my healing and allowed me to know myself on a deeper level.  [09:58] Understanding the deeper aspects of yoga as a spiritual practice, and how it skyrocketed my healing and became a way of life.  [14:33] What responsibility and the power of choice have to do with spirituality, and why practicing both is more spiritual than you may think. 

What if instead of focusing on what you want to accomplish externally, you look within and focus on who you need to become and how you can reinvent yourself to reach the healing, growth, and goals you desire?  The external world can fall apart, but how you manage your internal system and the magnitude of your is something no one can take away from you. Inner resilience and self-belief rooted in self-trust are all you need when embarking on a committed spiritual path while transforming the subconscious and subtle patterns that keep you stuck.  If you focus on your present reality, how wounded you are, or how many things you need to “fix” about yourself, it's natural to feel discouraged by the amount of work you need to undergo.  Therefore, I want you to look at the other side of the spectrum. I want you to look at the possibility you represent and explore ways to reinvent yourself.  This meditation is designed to look deep inside yourself, identify patterns you want to change, and then use your imagination to create a picture of who you want to become. Not who you think you can be or should be but who you WANT to be. It is your tool to reinvent yourself from the ground up.  How can you use this meditation: Commit to doing the meditation at least once a day, preferably twice in the morning and at night.  Write down the habits, patterns, or traits you want to change ( this is optional).  Write down a clear picture of who you want to become and what it looks like to reinvent yourself. Include as many details as you'd like, and then use this vision in your meditation (this is also optional).  Why is this meditation powerful? This guided meditation to reinvent yourself and reach your full potential is meant to pull you out of survival mode and into the seat of the possibility of who you can become. It helps you to identify subconscious patterns you may not be aware of and directs your attention toward inner healing.  

Beyond the tools and techniques we use to better self-regulate, there are 4 mindset shifts that create change on a level of perception. And as Wayne Dyer said, "When you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change."    So often, women come to me and say, “I tried everything, but I feel stuck.”  Often, it is one of these mindset shifts that they haven't yet established. Although tools and exercises are essential for building a diverse self-care toolkit and raising awareness, when we choose to expand our perception, growth is inevitable.  During this episode, I am taking the fluff out of the conversation. I encourage you to look at what is, not what you wish it would be. I invite you to let go of the stories and ruminations that keep you stuck and instead build a strong foundation for your growth.  Some of these mindset shifts may be already established in your life, and some may be missing. However, one thing I know for sure: If you take each of these mindset shifts to your heart and fully exercise them for the next 30 days, you will certainly see changes in your life, no questions about it.  Here is a glance at this episode… [01:45] What spirituality is and what is not, the misconception about being a bigger person, and why it's time to be real with yourself [03:20] Two most common excuses that keep you stuck and how commitment to your spiritual growth fuels change in your life  [09:05] How to be aware of compulsive thoughts that sabotage your progress and how to become more conscious and less reactive throughout the day  [12:20] Understanding the power you hold to change your life and eliminating the negative story you are holding onto  [13:50] Embracing the idea of a single-minded goal and asking yourself one powerful question 

There is a quote from Swami Vivekananda that empowers me every time I read it. He says, “Tell your body that it is strong. Tell your mind that it is strong and have unbounded faith and hope in yourself.” That, to me, represents a deep sense of self-belief.  Regardless of the circumstances we are brought up in, every single person can change their life and write their destiny by building a strong self-belief. Every belief you currently have (whether you consider it good or bad) is an accumulation of information and things you received throughout your life. However, if these beliefs stop you from creating the life you want, it's time to break them.  I've met so many people (and was one of them) who believed that I couldn't change my life and redesign my belief system. What a giant piece of a lie.  Although building a strong self-belief and breaking through the psychological limits we create may seem challenging, I want you to consider this: growth is not comfortable (but we love it). Stagnation or limiting beliefs aren't comfortable either (and we don't like it). Taking this perception into account, deciding to work on your belief system is a no-brainer.  When you build a strong self-belief, you invite clarity, confidence, and awareness into your life.  Even believing you can't build a strong self-belief is a limiting belief. And this is where many of us need to start and address the (often) hidden or subconscious limits we impose on ourselves.  In today's episode, I will talk about the types of beliefs we have and the 2 most common limiting beliefs. Also, I share 4 steps on how to build a strong self-belief.  Here is a glance at this episode:  [01:50] Beliefs that create possibilities vs. beliefs that create boundaries and walls  [03:45] two common beliefs many of us have that prevent us from healing and growing beyond our current circumstances and what to do about it   [08:15] How awareness of your subtler thoughts helps with strengthening your self-belief and how to break some of the limiting beliefs [10:50] 4-step process on how to build a strong self-belief and overcome limiting beliefs that keep you stuck 

Healing with grace means honoring the stage of your growth while nurturing a sense of respect and meeting yourself where you are.  Think about it - the number one reason you turn to emotional healing and spiritual growth is to experience more joy, happiness, and ease in your life.  But how often do you end up entangled in this process: judging yourself for the slightest mistakes, striving for perfectionism, or feeling guilty because you aren't meeting some unrealistic expectations? The most common barrier I see with my clients is that instead of love, support, or encouragement, they keep themselves in old patterns of judgment and guilt. Unconsciously following these patterns can also make healing toxic.  To prevent this from happening while positively supporting your growth, you must become conscious of these unconscious patterns and bring a sense of support and grace into the process.  In today's episode, I will talk about two main events that inspired me to record this podcast, how to honor your path without judgment and embrace healing with grace.  Here is a glance at the episode:  [01:02] What inspired me to record this podcast episode and how healing with grace changes and supports the process  [05:58] The most common barriers we face when it comes to healing and what stops us from moving through it with grace  [10:15] The idea of “where we should be” and the impact of comparison to someone else's journey  [12:55] The best support you can offer to yourself when walking your healing path and how to stay from judgment and unrealistic expectations  [14:55] A simple heart-opening technique to embrace loving emotions while healing with grace 

When I say “feeling empowered' - what comes to your mind? Living a life with no fear? Overcoming self-doubt? Setting boundaries? Not letting the opinions of others affect you? Or maybe something else?  What if you can live your life in this place?  One of the most inspiring things I understood about empowerment is that it comes from within and builds an immense level of self-respect. We feel empowered when we overcome our fears, heal a wound that has been there for a while, take a step while our legs are shaking, or set boundaries that were long overdue.   Although none of it means comfort, it means life. We get consumed or tricked into believing that comfort is what we should strive for.  But think about it, what is comfort? A dull place of self-protection.  When you choose to step out of your bubble (which you are capable of, BTW) - feeling empowered is inevitable. Once you get the boost of self-assurance and trust that you can conquer your fears, limits, and even your wounds, you'll begin to understand the power that's been your physical body and mind.  Today's podcast episode is exactly about what feeling empowered while trusting yourself means and, mostly, how to get there.  Here is a glance at this episode: [01:40] Living from a place of empowerment while trusting your inner guidance. A personal story of fear, stress, and anxiety that prompted me to question how I live my life and what thoughts predominate in my mind.  [05:58] What it means to trust yourself and how to practice looking within. The importance of being selective about the information that enters your mind.  [09:02] Handling self-doubt while feeling empowered through self-trust. How to identify the reason you feel dissatisfied with your life.  [14:56] Teaching you 2 exercises to practice this week to create a possibility in your life and overcome fears while feeling empowered. 

Can you eliminate all your negative thoughts for the rest of your life?  Maybe not, but you can certainly manage them effectively.  When you try to resent your negative thoughts, they often persist and become louder.  Therefore the trick isn't stopping your thoughts in track or exercising fake positivity (trust me, I tried, and it doesn't work), but rather, not identifying with everything you think.  Let's say there is a limiting belief you adopted in your childhood which you label as negative. Since this pattern of negative thoughts has been reestablished over many years, it's natural for your mind to keep bringing the same recycled thoughts back.  Since your mind is literally like a muscle, you want to learn to train it as such.  In today's episode, I will talk about how identification with our negative thoughts keeps us stuck in limiting thinking patterns. I will also teach you about the power of the pause, how to become an observer of what you are thinking without being sucked into it and share a mindfulness exercise to help with mind identification.  Last but not least, we will also look at the most obvious power we all have - the power of choice.  Here is a glance at this episode:  [02:10] Managing our internal system, looking at stress and anxiety in today's world and why we shouldn't accept it as the only way of life.  [04:24] What it means to identify with our thoughts, how to work through them, and an example of mind identification  [06:44] Practicing the power of PAUSE, being conscious instead of compulsive  [09:37] Detaching from what you think or what your thoughts mean by using this simple, yet powerful mindfulness exercise  [12:32] Choosing growth over comfort, summing up what it means to detach from negative thoughts and become in charge of how you think and feel. 

In this episode, we'll dive into what it means to find the courage within you by confronting your fears and embracing living boundlessly.  We both know that fear is real, no doubts about it. However, I refuse to sit here and accept that this is how “things are.” Are you with me? We were programmed to believe that living with anxiety is “normal” or that living with stress is “just' a part of daily living. Both are a product of our fears about what may go wrong, whether we have what it takes, what people think of us, and so many other reasons.  Fear keeps us paralyzed. And the highest price we pay is that deep down, we know we are downplaying ourselves. We know we have that courage within us to live boundlessly. I'll bet my life on it that you feel it too.  It is my deepest hope this podcast episode will allow you to see things differently while understanding that the worst-case scenario of what can go wrong when you decide to pursue your life's deepest desire is nothing compared to what you are losing if you don't.  Forget the “next time” thinking. There have been so many next time - I encourage you to make this one your last. I encourage you to find the courage within and start designing the life you dreamed of and so well deserve.  In today's podcast episode, we will cover  The fear of uncertainty and how our mind perceives it.  The story and what it means to let go. The most important question to ask yourself when finding the courage within. What can you do to prime your mind for change and overcome your fears. A 3-step process on how to handle it while finding the courage within.    Here is a glance at this episode:  [01:28] How fear stops us from making change and what it means to live courageously  [03:14] Fear of uncertainty and how your mind perceives it  [05:29] Committing to your healing and growth by asking yourself this profound question.  [11:05] Breaking down the concept of fear - what are you afraid of and how to face it  [12:50] Understanding what it means to choose your discomfort and how it activates the courage within to face your fears  [16:05] A few tools you can use to manage your mind and the impact of fear and a simple 3-step process to use daily 

What if I tell you there is a simple way to retrain your mind while going about your day as usual? And what if I tell you that you can use my 3-step process to accomplish just that? If I ask you, “Who are you?” Would you be able to answer that? (spoiler alert: If you are not sure, that's okay. Neither am I. But that's beside the point). You may not know who you are, at least not just yet, but we both can agree you are NOT your mind - you HAVE a mind.  Even better, we can think about your mind as a tool. You can sharpen it, change it, redesign it, retrain it, transform it, mold it, and so much more.   In this podcast episode, I will share a 3-step process to retrain your mind from judgment, negative thoughts and beliefs, or even unhealthy habits. What if you can retrain your mind from being a madman to an obedient servant?  I will take you from awareness to forgiveness to a new way of thinking. And a pretty cool thing about this is that you can practice this anywhere and anytime in the comfort of your mind. After you listen to this episode, I recommend you check out this mindfulness exercise, try my forgiveness meditation, and read my recent blog post on how to create powerful affirmations. You'll understand how these additional tools support you on your way to retraining your mind from negative thought patterns to feeling more empowered, inspired, and grateful.  Here is a glance at this episode: [01:56] How can you use this 3-step process to retrain your mind, and how it is changing the lives of my clients and my own.   [03:20] The example of one of my clients using the 3-step process,  [05:12] The one unhealthy but subtle pattern many of us have when it comes to self-awareness and how to overcome it.  [08:50] Understanding your mind and its behavior when changing unhealthy thought patterns, habits, and beliefs.  [13:20] Implementing forgiveness into this process and how lack of it often keeps us stuck  [15:04] How to replace your old patterns of thinking with new ones and some examples to help you get started  

Self-validation allows us to acknowledge, feel and process our emotions, while self-responsibility is where we step out of victimhood and into our power.  When you begin to look at any area of your life that is asking for healing, acknowledging what you feel is the first step. So often, we carry our pains silently because, as adults, aware only of our logical brain, we ridicule what our emotions try to tell us.  Self-validation or validating our emotions means honoring what is there, without judgment, ridicule, or a need to change the truth within. Once we allow ourselves to be fully expressive in our authentic, raw, and unapologetic selves, we create an outlet for stuck traumas and energies to find the way out.  I also believe there is a sense of power in our self-expression. The energy we use to hide, pretend, or deny transmutes into letting go and feeling it through.  Therefore, self-validation and recognition of our emotions is the first step toward healing the wounds. In today's podcast episode, I will also lead you through 4 steps to apply this process to your life.  Once we embrace what we feel and express it in a way we choose, we can acknowledge what part of us is playing a victim in a situation.  Although this (often) hard look in a mirror is intimidating and confronting, it is the only way to take charge of our thoughts and emotions and become in control of ourselves. Responsibility means response which we are always able to choose.  How do I want to respond to the behavior of my parents? How do I respond to my old thoughts that keep me stuck? How do I respond to the limiting beliefs that hold me back?  As you can see, there is a reason why validation comes before responsibility. However, choosing how we want to think and feel ultimately seals the deal and allows us to heal fully.    Here is a glance at this episode… [01:16] How self-validation affects our healing and what happens when we acknowledge and feel our emotions.  [01:56] What is the most common barrier within our healing, and how does lack of emotional validation affect our progress  [04:11] A 4-step process to acknowledge, recognize, validate, and feel our emotions.  [06:42] An affirmation I use during this 4-step process and how it allows me to open up while withstanding the discomfort of feeling deep emotions.  [10:29] How understanding the depth of our wounds allows us to understand more about what happened to us and use compassion instead of judgment  [14:10] Moving on the other side of the spectrum, stepping out of the victimhood, and recognizing where the power is. 

Tune into this guided meditation to ease anxiety while embracing a safe space within you.  Here is the thing, my friend. At what point in our lives have we accepted that living with this fearful feeling lingering in the back of our mind is normal? Whether it is because of the negative information we mindlessly consume or the dysregulated nervous system, is this the only way to "do life?" Learning to self-regulate while managing your thoughts and emotions is a useful skill to acquire during your healing process and something we all can learn and practice.  You and I know that keeping our anxiety at bay while maintaining inner calm isn't always easy.  Whether this results from past experiences, unhealed childhood wounds, or overthinking mind, dysregulated nervous system requires some time to heal and get organized.  Therefore the question is: "How can you regulate your thoughts and emotions and rewire your brain from trauma to healing?" There are many ways to do that, and meditation is one of them.   In honor of mental health awareness month, I designed a 15-minute guided meditation to ease anxiety while providing you with a sense of protection and nurturing.  When you approach your healing from the place of inner grounding, you are more prone to open your heart and embrace emotions that give you support, courage, and desire to heal. Also, you are learning how to create a safe space within you that you can access anytime.  Enjoy!  Namaste.

In today's episode, I will be sharing five powerful coaching questions that transformed not only my life but also the lives of my clients, and I hope they will do the same for you.  We all have what I call blind spots. These are things others may see, but we are blind to them. It often happens when we are in the arena, dealing with the rawness of life while trying to figure out and handle things in the best way possible.  The power of coaching questions is to uncover these blind spots, give us more options, and offer solutions or bring us back to what matters the most when we get off track.  Each of these coaching questions serves a specific purpose to allow you to think bigger and with more potential.  For the first four questions, I suggest you make some time and write your answers down. Often, when we put things on paper, we gain more clarity and make whatever we write more real.  The last question is truly one of my favorites! I encourage you to ask yourself this question as often as you want. It is a fun and playful way to uplift your spirit and embrace the fact that you should always be your biggest fan.  Enjoy the episode! Here's a glance at this episode >> [02:25] How to use your innate intelligence and potential to answer these five coaching questions and why you have answers already within you  >> [04:30] Focusing on becoming the person you want to be and one thing no one can take away from you  >> [07:20] The most transformation question I asked myself when I was in India and how it can change your life on a fundamental level  >> [15:15] Taking a look at the role of stress in your life and what to ask yourself when you feel stressed, worried, or anxious  >> [17:40] The importance of regulating your emotional state and using this simple coaching question to find the right way for you. >> [20:25] My favorite coaching question I encourage you to ask yourself every day to uplift and empower your spirit and emotional state   

How can we cultivate heartfelt emotions and use them to heal ourselves and build more resilience?  When we live in a state of fear, our hearts are closed, and our nervous system spends most of the time in a fight or flight mode. We feel less energy, and although we wake up every morning and do the things we have to, it may feel as if we are not living.  When we begin opening our hearts to life and embracing heartfelt emotions like joy, compassion, forgiveness, gratitude, or even deep sadness, we will experience more aliveness and resilience.  Think of it this way: where is gratitude fear can't exist. If we are healing from the place of love and compassion, we are more courageous to look at our past and address it in a healthier and more productive way.  On the contrary, when we live in fear, we live in a state of judgment and negativity. Healing from this place may often become impossible.  In today's podcast episode, I will lead you through a series of simple exercises you can use to cultivate those heartfelt emotions and begin learning how to open your heart to life. Please make no mistake. When I say “open your heart,” I don't mean to go and love the world. Rather, focus on feeling and becoming love. Everything else will work better for that place.  [01:40] How is fear preventing us from opening our hearts, and why do we develop this protective mechanism early in childhood?  Here is a glance at this episode... [02:41] The importance of heartfelt emotions during our healing and the profound difference it made in my recovery.  [04:44] What opening your heart means, how it looks, and why it is not what you might think.  [08:20] A powerful story of a warrior that illustrates what it means to live with an open heart.  [12:05] A few simple exercises to open your heart and embrace heartfelt emotions and the power of intentions. 

About three years ago, I was a member of a coaching group with Jay Shetty, and we were covering a forgiveness month. One of the things he did with us was a mindfulness exercise on self-forgiveness.  I remember closing my eyes and saying, “I forgive myself.” The moment I spoke these words out loud, I started crying and couldn't participate anymore. Therefore, I had to finish the session on replay.  This experience was a profound moment of realizing how much guilt and self-judgment we hold and how little forgiveness we allow ourselves to receive.  Have you ever thought about your inner voice and what it says when you make a mistake?  Do you beat yourself down for every mistake you make but barely recognize the thing you do well?  In my last article, I talked about forgiveness and how crucial it is to practice it regularly. I gave you a few ideas on how you can implement forgiveness into your daily routine and begin letting go of guilt and judgment.  You know I am big on creating your self-care toolkit. Your toolkit is a collection of tools and techniques you use to regulate your emotional state, improve your mind management and support your healing process. Therefore, I decided to create a simple tool for you to practice self-forgiveness and bring more acceptance, understanding, and compassion into your life.  I recorded short, 10-minute guided forgiveness meditation you can add to your self-care toolkit to soothe yourself when in a judgment attack or to heal deep-rooted guilt that you have not yet addressed.  I hope this simple meditation will empower your healing and serve you well. 

During my yoga studies in India, I learned techniques for better mind management to regulate my emotional state with more calm and consideration. Today, I want to share a mindfulness exercise to help you do the same.  Although I don't want to go too philosophical on you here, I believe our mind often runs on old “software” - a program full of limiting beliefs or habits we acquired. Therefore if we identify with what we think, it becomes quite difficult to heal ourselves, especially when thoughts we think are negative or disempowering.  I recorded a 10-minute simple mindfulness exercise focused on two parts of your mind. First is understanding that you aren't your thoughts. The second is developing a better relationship with your mind.  I designed this simple mindfulness exercise to add to your self-care toolbox and use as a technique for better mind management. Remember that everything in your life derives from the way you think. Therefore, a healthy mind is a foundation for deep inner healing and transformative growth.

If you want to change your life, whether to heal your past or transform your current situation, do it by training yourself to manage your thoughts effectively.   Since your thoughts create your feelings and your feelings drive your actions, your life is a result of what you think all day long. Therefore, to make sustainable changes and live life on your terms,  you must go back and address the source - your MIND.  To take the overwhelm out of the picture by trying everything while seeing minimal results, you can commit to one daily practice: manage your thoughts through mind awareness while consciously and deliberately choosing what you want to think. Although this may sound overly simplistic, I found that going back to the basics and addressing the root of what creates our reality is a powerful practice where you learn how to manage your thoughts and stop letting your mind run wild.  [04:04] How to use a simple method of mind awareness while choosing what we want to think.  [09:06] Going back to the basics about mind management and how a simple adjustment in your awareness creates significant changes in your outer and inner world.  [11:58] The importance of staying away from judgment while accepting and befriending your mind.  [13:25] How to approach your thoughts with curiosity while paying attention to your emotional state.  [14:10] Why there isn't a “secret” to happiness and how the only “secret" lies in the power of your mind and how well you manage your thoughts.  [15:52] The importance of disidentifying with your mind while understanding that you aren't your thoughts.  [17:40] How to live your life by choice, not by default, and overcome the fear of taking risks and living fully. 

We don't heal through judgment while inflicting more guilt on ourselves for the choices we make. We do it by understanding what happened to us and taking responsibility for our healing by consciously changing our self-sabotaging habits. For most of us, the results of our survival mechanism won't make lots of sense to our adult logical selves. Self-betrayal or self-sabotage is, in fact, the protective mechanism our brain developed to ensure our survival. Pondering the question, “what happened to me” instead of “what's wrong with me” leads to more understanding and self-compassion. This is especially useful when you end up triggered, act in unhealthy ways, or do something your logical self doesn't approve of. You can use your conscious awareness to change your life and make different choices while caring for yourself better. The crucial part of your healing process lies in learning how to heal with love. In today's episode, we'll cover: [02:08] How to overcome and deal with the emotional charge and triggers we feel when reflecting and acknowledging our past. [04:07] How to understand our past and what happened to us through the eyes of understanding and self-compassion. [07:10] How to use our conscious awareness to question how we act today while maintaining the level of understanding and empathy, and how this leads to faster growth. [11:50] The importance of seeking appropriate help by defining what you want to address and heal. How getting a therapist to address my sexual trauma supported my recovery and gave me tools and techniques to lean on. [16:02] A simple tool I use to support my growth and develop a more loving relationship with myself.

Is there such a thing as knowing too much? Can we miss out on profound moments of healing and growth because we try to crack the complex code of our mental and emotional recovery while overlooking the simplicity of this process? In today's episode, I will take you back to the basics of what it means to transform your life and heal your past one thought at a time. Although disciplining your mind may not be easy at first, cultivating this practice can lead to less anxiety, a healthier and more trusting perception of the world, and evoke more love and kindness while finding lessons even in the most difficult experiences. Since our thoughts create our emotional state, learning to become aware of what we think, and let unproductive and negative thoughts pass without judgment is the single most important practice of your healing and growth. >>[01:43] Why knowing “too much” can stop us from growth and create barriers in our healing process >>[06:44] Disciplining your mind while becoming aware of what predominating thoughts you think regularly. >>[09:20] How our thoughts either inspire more healing or keep us stuck in a loop and how to overcome this >>[11:30] A simple exercise to observe your thinking and perception and its impact on your growth >>[16:10] Committing to a conscious practice of choosing empowering thoughts

How do you make yourself feel good when facing challenging times, and do you even allow yourself to feel good in the first place? Today's podcast episode was inspired by my past 2 weeks when I felt like I was on an emotional rollercoaster while struggling to find any inner balance or peace. I realized how my spiritual practice allowed me to get through these weeks with more calm and ease and reminded me how important it is to have habits, tools, and techniques in place when facing those difficult days. In fact, I realized how many of us don't even allow ourselves to feel better because we either think we don't have time, we don't deserve it, or we were in our survival mode for so long, we don't even know what feeling good looks like, let alone feels like. Most of your life depends on how you feel. Since your actions are driven by your emotions, how can you cultivate a mindset of self-care and self-nurturing when challenges arise? In today's episode, I will share the importance of allowing ourselves to feel good ( I know, crazy, but “not allowing yourself to feel good is a thing many of us live with). I will also go over the details of my spiritual practice and what I regularly practice to maintain more inner peace and calmness in my life. >>[00:45] how my emotional state inspired me to record this podcast episode when I realized (again) that cultivating good feelings makes a huge difference when it comes to my decisions, actions, and overall results. >>[01:50] The role of our mindset when it comes to maintaining a positive emotional state, why many of us struggle to allow ourselves to feel good and how to change that. >>[07:47] Defining your self-love language, using love in action, and how to define and apply your self-love language into your life. >>[12:30] The power of spiritual practice - how I am using my spiritual practice to heal and care for myself. Examples of what you can incorporate into your spiritual practice to learn habits, tools, and techniques to feel good.

A couple of weeks ago, I published my first self-love meditation to heal your inner child. Since many of you enjoyed it, I decided to create a little bit longer meditation for self-soothing and bringing more joy and inner peace into your life. This is a great meditation if you need a little more care and a little more nurturing.  “It's not through healing that you will love yourself. It's through loving yourself that you will heal.” Finding comfort in meditation  Although there are many different meditation styles and mindfulness exercises, I picked one that feels comforting and soothing. Some days, we may see the light shining a little brighter, while other days, it's challenging to get out of bed.  The beauty of meditation is that you can “come as you are” without judgment or expectations and express where you are, whether mentally and emotionally, most purely and authentically.  Soothing meditation for more Joy and Inner Peace The goal of today's meditation is to soothe yourself with love and compassion and give yourself a little extra care. Whether it'll be through breathing or a simple visualization, keep feelings of love and care in your awareness throughout the entire meditation session.  This meditation is intended to get you centered, grounded, and peaceful, so you can spend this time nurturing your spirit and soul.  At the beginning of meditation, I will ask you to set an intention. I invite you to recognize that by sitting down and caring for your mind and soul, you practice and live in a state of self-love. Especially for those of you who are here to heal and learn how to love yourself, this is an excellent way to practice it. By keeping this intention in your mind, you will make this meditation even more powerful.  The beauty of meditation is its repetition of simple steps or techniques that eventually change your mindset, help you self-regulate, and bring calm into your life. By repeatedly focusing on loving and caring for yourself, you will strengthen these mental muscles and, eventually, transform them into a new way of life. 

You come into this world as a super cute, adorable, perfect, playful, lovable, and carefree baby. Your soul is pure and your heart wide open. But then… Life happens. Suddenly you find yourself in your adulthood, considering whether you should get a therapist, move to California, go to one of the anonymous meetings or lie to yourself and pretend that everything is fine. Since you are here, I assume you want to change your life and how you feel. If that is the case, I encourage you, with all my heart, to start working and nurturing a relationship with your inner child. Inner child's work often brings up the feelings that heal us the most; feelings of love, compassion, and empathy. It also allows us to reconnect with disowned parts of ourselves, process stored emotions from the past, exercise self-compassion, and forgive ourselves for any self-betrayal or self-harm we caused to ourselves. Nurturing a relationship with your inner child is a powerful practice of healing and loving yourself. Therefore, if you are on your healing journey or ready to start, I encourage you to include the inner child's work in your practice. Last week, I shared a 10-minute guided self-love meditation for healing your inner child. I invite you to try it out and give it a listen. In today's episode, I will talk about three ways how I have been nurturing and healing a relationship with my inner child. >>[01:27] Why and how meditation changed my life and the way I heal. >>[01:58] Why is the inner child's work an important part of the healing process, and how do you learn it and implement it into your life? 3 ways how to nurture a relationship with your inner child. >>[06:16] Compassion as the first way to nurture a relationship with your inner child. Challenges I faced when I started with the inner child's work and how I handled them. A simple visualization tool for more compassion. >>[11:09] Asking for forgiveness from your inner child and recognizing any self-betrayal or self-sabotage. >>[15:01] Hugging your inner child as the third way to nurture a relationship with her, and the loving words I tell my inner child when I visualize hugging her.

I am thrilled to share the 10-minute meditation on self-love and connecting with your inner child.  Healing Through Meditation  During the years of my healing, I tried many tools and techniques to learn how to heal my past while developing a more loving relationship with myself. I am honored to be able to share these tools with you and help you on your healing journey.  I've tried many ways to heal my soul through yoga, meditation, traditional talk therapy, plant medicine, spiritual retreats, and personal development programs. My healing practice allowed me to face my trauma, become aware of my triggers and self-sabotaging behaviors, and learn the art of self-love in my everyday life.  However, one of the most effective tools I have practiced so far is meditation. Today, I want to lead you through simple meditation practice to deepen the relationship with your inner child while embracing self-compassion and self-love.  Self-Love meditation to Heal Your Inner Child  The goal of the meditation is to bring you back in touch with your inner child and use self-love and self-compassion to approach this sacred relationship.  If you don't meditate or aren't familiar with inner child work, don't worry. Find a comfortable place without distractions, grab your phone and your head set, and simply tune in. Meditation isn't about perfection but the benefits you reap by embracing this practice.  Before you start the meditation, I encourage you to set intentions by focusing on your heart and the love you carry within. You will use it once interacting with your inner child during the meditation.  By setting this intention, you are priming your soul, mind, and body for loving and compassionate feelings - something your inner child needs the most.  You can do this meditation by sitting or lying down, totally your choice.  I believe you will find this meditation loving and, at the same time, empowering. Namaste, my beautiful soul.  Get my FREE Self-Coaching Worksheet. Click HERE. 

I am sure you tried many ways, read tons of books, and listened to podcasts and videos on how to love yourself, how to see your worth, and how, at the same time, to heal yourself. Or, perhaps, you stumbled here by accident (or by choice) and want to learn how to overcome the never-ending spiral of self-sabotage, people-pleasing, and self-punishment.  No matter where you are on your journey, one of the most loving and caring things you can do for yourself is to have the courage to look within.   I know, I know. You are thinking, “Well, Silvia, it all sounds great, but this is easier said than done.” And you are right.  However, we both can agree that it is possible. Therefore, with the right tools (which I provide you with), you can significantly transform your life and adopt a mindset that the “sky's the limit” (the sky doesn't have a limit BTW).  When I talk about the power of healing, I want you to focus on the future the healed version of you will be able to build and create. Most of our life and the results we are getting are tied to how we think, who we believe we are, and what we know, in our heart, we can accomplish.  Unhealed versions of ourselves are often fearful, feel unworthy, or not good enough. It's hard to build the life of your dreams with this mindset, don't you think?  Not to worry, my beautiful soul. In today's podcast episode, I will teach you a powerful tool to calm your anxiety and get into a state of love and compassion while becoming peaceful and centered.  >> [00:50] Why I took a 1-year break from podcasting, what I have been up to and how it transformed my healing and overall state of mind.  >> [04:30] 10-minute meditation to calm your anxiety, and embrace love and compassion while working with your inner child.  >> [14:50] How to start laying the foundation for your healing through self-awareness. The role of self-forgiveness in the process and why it is an important component of self-awareness.  >> [20:04] Building your self-care toolkit by learning tools and techniques to help you self-regulate, be mindful of your triggers, and calm down when you most need it.  >> [22:12] The concept of self-love, how to practice loving yourself, and why self-love is the deepest form of self-expression. 

Previously, I mentioned to you that I created a free self-coaching worksheet as a way to teach you how to develop this life-altering skill, and I am also providing you with nine questions to coach yourself. Click HERE to get the worksheet. In today's episode, I want to talk more on this topic since coaching has exponentially transformed my life, and I have seen many people who created significant changes by utilizing this skill. Learning how to coach yourself leads to inner exploration, self-awareness, and transformation. In today's episode, I will teach you how I coach myself. First, I will start with some prep steps. I will talk about how to incorporate self-coaching into your routine and make it a habit. I will share with you one simple trick that allows me to go deeper and become more intuned with things I am working on and why having an open mind is the key to successful self-coaching. Last but not least, I will share the most powerful part of self-coaching, and that's asking yourself mind-triggering questions. Self-coaching is a skill based on your resourcefulness and inner wisdom. It allows you to figure things out, grow more, heal better and trust yourself that no matter what is happening in your life, you are capable to handle it, achieve it or resolve it.

One of the most common patterns I observed during my growth and the growth of my friends and my clients is that once we start healing and growing, we are overly harsh on ourselves. We believe we shouldn't be feeling the way we feel, we shouldn't be acting in old ways, and we should be better than we are. As I always say, growth is an imperfect process, and occasional emotional relapse or stagnation is part of it. We work on ourselves because we want to be better and because we want to upgrade the quality of our lives to feel happier and more content with who we are. Therefore we have to learn to forgive ourselves for our mistakes, shortcomings, or toxic traits we are working on. The most important thing to understand is that you are working hard on yourself while uncovering traits and patterns that demand your courage to face them. Self-judgment may be one of those traits. For your growth and healing to be truly effective, you must include self-forgiveness as a part of your healing process. In today's episode, I will talk about the importance of forgiveness during your healing process. I will share with you three habits I regularly exercise when I find myself feeling guilty and shameful.

One of the most common struggles people share with me is the fear of healing or growing. At first, it may sound counterintuitive since we all want to be happy, positive, and peaceful since that's what growing and healing provide. However, if we bottled up too much for too long, looking at the truth of who we are or the truth of our situation terrifies us. Although the fear of healing and growth is natural, we can't let it stop us from the transformation we need to go through. In the end, it's the only way to significantly change your life. In today's episode, I will talk about the fear of growth and why not every pain we feel is the same. The pain of being stuck in life turns into suffering since we keep replaying it. But the discomfort of growth and healing turns into change, transformation, and more peace. I will provide you with three simple tools to manage your emotional state and your fears when it comes to growth. These simple practices will teach you how to exercise your emotional intelligence, stop reacting to things and people around you and find the courage to heal yourself.

Perfectionism is a desire not to be seen for who we are but to hide and pretend that we are someone we are not. Perfectionism is based on fear. Often, we strive for it since we don't want to fail or be seen who we are - with our failures, shortcomings, weaknesses AKA imperfections. The most common fear is the fear of failure. But there is also fear of rejection, unworthiness or not being good enough for others because of our flaws. Perfectionism doesn't let us take a risk because we fear failure, it numbs us because we push away negative (imperfect) emotions or make us control anything and everything to be, feel and look perfect. Perfectionism is a deep issue for me since I've seen how it significantly impacted my life and the lives of others. In today's episode, I will share with you six tips on how to recognize, address, and heal the illusionary, "perfect" part of you. 1. Self-talk (challenge your inner critic 2. Define your self-worth 3. Embrace the messiness 4. Consider the fact that you may be codependent 5. Adopt a growth mindset 6. Forgive yourself

For many of us, it's uncomfortable to admit that we are "playing around," not doing the work we know we have to do while being stuck at the same place in life. Once we admit that we are the ones standing in our way, what's left? There isn't anyone to blame or point fingers at, and we are challenged to take responsibility. So if you feel that you are struggling right now, that the same situations keep repeating, the same people keep showing up, the same drama keeps happening, and the same chaos is taking place in your life, it's time to ask yourself, "Am I walking my talk or am I talking my talk?" In today's episode, I will share with you a 4-step process I personally use when I notice that I am not getting the results I want in my life to determine my part in it. Step #1 is to pick one thing that's not going well in your life and give it your undivided attention. Step #2 is, to be honest with yourself about where you are and what you have done so far to change this situation. Step #3 is to become aware of your thoughts, emotions, and actions while facing the problem you are dealing with and observe them on a regular, daily basis. Step #4 is to come up with a new course of action you will take the next time you are dealing with it. Remember that the only person who can change your life is you, and that's your superpower. 

When we choose to lie to ourselves and stay in denial, it's because we don't want to see the truth about ourselves or others. These lies give us instant gratification, take away responsibility, allow blame while at the same time, we are betraying ourselves. We do that because the truth seems to be too much to handle. But without being 100% honest with yourself, you can't grow. Growth is confronting, uncomfortable, self-responsibility-driven, and at times intimidating. But growth is also liberating, empowering, and exciting. We all get stuck in denial sometimes and choose to ignore the truth. The question is, "what are we so afraid to face?" If you are investing your time into listening to this episode or educating yourself in terms of personal development and emotional healing, I want you to consider something, "Are you walking your talk or talking your talk because you fear the truth?" In today's episode, I will share with you three reasons why we lie to ourselves. I will also talk about two simple things you can start doing today to practice self-honesty and live your life in the present moment instead of denying the reality.  

There is so much wisdom, teaching, and opportunities in pain or hardships we are going through. But since we are such emotional beings often driven by what we feel, we overlook the lesson and look for the nearest exit or instant gratification instead. Then we wonder why some of the lessons keep repeating themselves over and over. In todays' episode, I will share with you a 4-step process on how to find the opportunity in hardships, recognize them and use them to support your growth and emotional healing. Step #1 is to "pause" before you react to your old ways and patterns. Step #2 is to observe your triggers, feelings, and actions and evaluate them before acting on them. Step #3 is to recognize the opportunity for growth, and what is this situation trying to tell you? Step #4 is to commit to working on yourself from the inside out and quit fixing your life on the surfaced level.

Hello, my beautiful soul. When we blame, we give our power to someone or something else, and our emotional and mental state depends on external circumstances. But when we choose to take responsibility for our life, it's like saying, "I am in charge, and I am taking my power back." There are two types of self-responsibility. One is what I call "artificial responsibility and then there is what I call "true responsibility." I will explain the difference between both.  Last but not least, I will share the 4-step process on how to put this powerful skill into practice. Step #1 is to become aware of your emotions and be honest about how you truly feel. Step #2 is to take ownership of your thoughts, emotions, and actions. Step #3 is to set intentions and consciously decide that you will look for the lesson and growth in any given situation, no matter how hard or challenging it is. Step #4 is to ask, "What do I tolerate?" and then directing your focus on your boundaries, standards, level of your worth, as well as self-love instead of blaming others for how they treat you.

People who experience traumas, fight the feeling of abandonment, struggle to see their worth or their value will often settle for less without recognizing it. You may find yourself in toxic relationships, constantly wrapped up in the drama, tolerating things you don't feel comfortable with, or taking abuse while never questioning it since it feels like home. But when someone who has healed or have grown up in a loving home point it out for you, you begin to realize that not everything you are allowing is actually okay. In today's podcast episode, I'll share with you how to start recognizing the things you tolerate, stop making excuses for people's behavior, and set healthy boundaries with yourself and others. There are three steps you can start taking today to learn how to stand up for yourself "AKA" honor your boundaries. Step #1 The word "I" isn't selfish. Although I believe that we all are on this Earth to serve someone or something, we can do it the best while exercising our boundaries without fear. Saying "I don't feel comfortable with it' or "I don't feel okay with it" is a good enough reason not to do or tolerate what's uncomfortable. Step #2 You want to use some of your most powerful internal resources, and that's taking responsibility for your life. Being responsible gives you the power and heals you at the same time. Step #3 Set your boundaries by asking yourself two important questions: "How comfortable am I with it?" and "Is this what I want?" Once you know the answer to these questions, it's your responsibility to communicate it to others and hold them responsible if they cross them. Standing up for yourself means creating boundaries with people and hold them accountable to them.

In the previous episode, I talked about what emotional armor is and the reasons many of us carry this guard to protect ourselves from hurt, pain, or disappointment. But as we already learned, emotional armor is a product of our fear - fear to get hurt or fear to feel pain. We develop this coping mechanism since we haven't healed certain parts of ourselves, haven't overcome our traumas, or haven't felt through emotions we need to heal. Since the last week, we talked about the definition and reasons for our emotional guard. In today's episode, I will teach you five steps on how to let this emotional armor go, put it down, and protect yourself by developing emotional and mental resilience rather than guarding yourself. Step #1 is to acknowledge you are guarded. I know this sounds simplistic to many of us but sometimes admitting that we have this guard that doesn't allow us to receive and enjoy everything we want is the most confronting part of the transformation. Step #2 is to reflect on how was this armor protecting you. Realizing that your guard is nothing but the illusion of safety creates profound insights and understanding that armoring up won't protect you in the first place. Step #3 is to develop a new coping mechanism by allowing yourself to feel your emotions. Step #4 is to confront your fear of pain or hurt. Get into a habit of asking yourself, "What is the worst that can happen if I open up?" Step #5 is to confront your pain and understand that unless you decide to heal and feel the pain that has been stored inside of you for months or even years, you won't allow yourself to feel good emotions either. Think of the armor as a door. Once you close it, once you put it up, nothing can go out in terms of healing, but nothing can go in in terms of love, joy, and happiness.

In today's episode, I want to talk to all of my tough cookies, who are carrying this illusionary shield, or as I call it, the "emotional guard" for protection. We guard up because we got hurt. Since we don't want to feel this way again, we armor up, hoping it will protect us from experiencing this pain again. Do you know what I found out, my friend? This guard is nothing but an illusion, and it's based on fear. It took me a long time to understand that guarding myself is a waste of my time and effort. We armor up because of three main reasons. 1. We are afraid to get hurt 2. We don't want to be seen, so we choose perfection over authenticity 3. We don't know how to cope with pain, so we reach for this toxic coping mechanism to keep our emotions under control. Since our emotional armor is a product of our fear of hurt, it doesn't allow us to heal because we are not feeling our emotions. We are in fear to feel. And if we are in fear to feel, we can't process our emotions and move through them. Today, I want you to reconsider the armor you are carrying around. Be honest and ask yourself, "Has this been working for me? Has this been helping me to deal with my traumas and heal my toxic traits?" OR "Has this been keeping me in fear and preventing me from opening up?"

Well, hello there, my beautiful soul. In today's episode, I will teach you how to build emotional resilience but before I dive deeper, let me give you a simple definition of what it means. Emotional resilience is the ability to adapt to stressful situations and cope with life's ups and downs. Resilience does not eliminate stress or erases life's difficulties but allows you to tackle or accept problems and live through adversity. Resilience is also about accepting what is, letting go of resistance to what's happening, and then dealing with it as it is not as we wish it would be. From my personal experience, more resistance creates more suffering. Yes or yes? Now, let's move to an exciting part of this episode, and that's how to build emotional resilience in three simple ways. What I want to share with you today is what's been working for me and how I understand and practice this powerful skill. Way #1 is to remind yourself to surrender. How much suffering do we bring on ourselves just by wishing for things to be better or for people to act differently? You will find power and control when you choose to look in the mirror, not outside of it. Way #2 is to learn to sit in discomfort. I teach you to bet on yourself. To bet on your inner strength and your resources you have within. Sitting in discomfort is one of those resources. Way #3 is to ask yourself one simple question: "Who do I want to be or how do I want to act in the time of adversity?"

Any transformation or growth requires one essential skill, and that's self-awareness. Self-awareness is the willingness to see and acknowledge who you are, with all your imperfections, toxic traits, wounds, strengths, and weaknesses. Being aware is about being responsible for your life, thoughts, emotions, and actions. To me, my friend, that's power. Many of us fear acknowledging the truth about who we are. We are afraid that we won't like it, or we feel worse about ourselves. But the truth is that the first step towards change is to know what you want and need to change. In today's episode, I will teach you how to learn, develop and practice the skill of self-awareness with five simple steps. First, you learn how to exercise your willingness to be honest with yourself, your strengths as well as your weaknesses and things you need to heal. Second, you will observe your behavior regularly and learn to recognize your patterns. As a third step, you will ask yourself open-minded and powerful questions to become more aware. The next step is going to be about gathering constructive feedback from people who love and support you. And last but not least, you will acknowledge your strengths, things you are good at, and all the benefits you bring to the table.

One of the most common questions or concerns people share with me is how to properly deal with what we call the "hard stuff." Since our desire to feel good, to feel happy and excited about life is strong, our desire to stop feeling sad, depressed, or betrayed is even greater. But when we push those uncomfortable emotions away and try to drink away, binge away, or work away from our pain, what we are doing is pushing this pain even deeper into our subconscious. The goal of healing and developing emotional resilience isn't to push away or push deeper, but to push up to maximize your growth. You can only heal what you can feel. There are four most common reasons why we choose to opt-out of our emotions. Those are denial, fear, the uncertainty of where to start, and our ego. When we give ourselves permission to feel, the ego doesn't drive us, we break through denial, and the fear we had about the discomfort and pain turns into relief and healing. In today's episode, I share with you the benefits of embracing painful emotions. At the end of the episode, we will put this theory into practice where I lead you through a simple exercise.

For many of us, the idea of "How do I love myself?" is a million-dollar question. I will answer it in today's episode since there has been a lot I learned in these past months. Look at self-love as a skill you want to learn and develop. Like any skill, it takes a little bit of time and practice to get it "right" or become more familiar with it. For me, self-love requires three things - awareness, strength, and action. You become aware of your triggers and what makes you question or hustle for your worth. Then, you have to have the strength to make choices and decisions that aren't always easy but necessary for your well-being. And then you have to put it into practice since love is a verb, not only a feeling. The best time to test the level of self-love and self-respect comes when you are in the arena, in real-life situations. In the second part of this episode, I will share with you three steps on how to develop more love and respect towards yourself. As I mentioned earlier, the first step is to recognize your triggers and understand your behavior. The second step is to commit to this journey. Consider it your very first serious "attempt" to love and respect yourself. And last but not least, get into a habit of making what I call "hard choices", respect your boundaries and standards and understand the definition of "choosing yourself."

Have you ever left a relationship, a job, or a situation and couldn't understand why you stayed in it for so long even though it wasn't good for you? You may be asked yourself "Why did I tolerate it?" As human beings, we are flexible. We adapt, we blend in, we change and we adjust to whatever situation we are in if we are in it long enough. And whatever seemed once unacceptable, becomes insignificant because we get used to it. The question is "Do we tolerate certain things because they move us forward and help us grow or because we are selling ourselves short and hustle for connection and approval?" In today's podcast episode, I will lead you through four steps on how to recognize this pattern of behavior and what to do about it. The first step is to define whether this is a reoccurring pattern, meaning you keep tolerating the same things over and over while not being comfortable with them. The second step is to define why you tolerate something and whether it is coming from a place of healthy sacrifice or lack of self-respect. The third step is to ask yourself these questions: "Do I want to keep tolerating this?" "Is this helping me grow or understand something?" "Is it moving me forward or keeping me stuck and brings me down?" Although these questions are confronting, they often bring up the truth we need to see. The last step is to set a standard and define your boundaries and commit to respecting them.

How often do you find yourself in constant doubt when it comes to your decisions? You are going back and forth between multiple options, then consult your problems with numerous people, gather seven different opinions while feeling even more confused and unsure than at the beginning.  So often, people come to me and ask me; "What should I do? What is the best thing I can do?" And I always tell them that they already know the answer.  The problem isn't in not knowing what you need or want to do but in unsettling self-doubt whether the decision you are about to make will be the "right" one.  Since I've been contemplating the question of self-trust for a while now, in today's podcast episode I am going to lead you through a step-by-step proven formula that I've been using to trust myself more and support my decision-making.  Here are the six steps: Step #1 Is expert advice necessary? Step #2 The importance of shutting down the noise Step#3 The impact of your environment on your decision-making Step#4 Why taking responsibility bread confidence  Step#5 Mind VS. heart decisions Step#6 Set a deadline

Developing a support system for yourself is one of the fundamental ways on how to work towards transformation and overcome personal challenges. When we talk about the support system, we often refer to our family or friends, our therapist, coach, or a mentor. Although the support of your environment is essential for effective growth, what can you do, personally, to support yourself? Your support system is a set of rules, tools, or personal commitments and boundaries you develop with yourself. Being aware of what you need the most when facing a challenge or overcoming a toxic trait is an act of self-love that breeds respect. In today's podcast episode, I will share with you four parts of my support system I developed for a better and healthier lifestyle. The first part of my support system is scheduling time for reflecting, observing as well as crying. It is the time when I vent when I allow myself to feel vulnerable and observe my triggers and unconscious behaviors in the past weeks. The second part of my support system is shutting down the noise and developing more trust in myself. The next part of my self-support to sit with my emotions without trying to change them or make them better. The last part of my support system is to distance myself from a situation that highly upsets me to think about it, process it, and circle back to talk about it.

Many of us worry a lot. We worry about our families, friends, our future, our jobs. But think about this: "How many things we worry about never actually happen?" Since we all know the true answer to this question, it's imperative to learn the skill of emotional management by being aware of our thoughts and working with them. Handling challenges isn't about surviving them but also about managing the amount of stress we feel in the process. In today's podcast episode, I will teach you how to better manage your mind and how to train yourself to focus more on possibilities than obstacles. We will practice two fundamental questions to effectively manage your mind and handle unexpected, difficult, or unwanted situations. The first question we practice is "What is the worse that can happen if...(fill in the blank). The second question we practice is "What is the absolute best that can happen if...(fill in the blank). Except for these two questions, I will teach you how to break down difficult situations in your life and find the lesson in them. I will also show you how to manage the relationship between your thinking and feeling brain.

No matter how much personal development you do, addressing new things in your life will always challenge you.  Changing yourself, your old patterns, your behavior, your toxic traits or your limiting beliefs takes courage and true dedication to your growth.  In today's episode, I want to share with you what are the two most common challenges we face when it comes to changing our lives. Although you may think that addressing difficult things about yourself is a challenge, the real challenge is pretending our perfection and creating an illusion that we are without flaws.  The second challenge is to take responsibility for your behavior.  The difference between people who break generational curses, healed their traumas, or resolve their pains and those who don't isn't only about the intensity of their experience but how they choose to respond to it.  Since many of my friends and clients express their desire to be empowered, I will share with you two types of empowerment we can experience. One is based on our emotions only and doesn't last, while the other is based on healing and provides lasting results.  In the second part of this episode, I will share with you three steps on how to find the courage to change yourself and your life and how to achieve true inner empowerment in the process.