Work Life Play with Aaron McHugh

Friends, today I wanna talk about how zigzag lines make for a better story. So, good story is not a straight line I heard a friend say just recently. And it really arrested my attention mostly because I wish it wasn't true. Intellectually I know this idea, like, it makes sense. Like when you listen to the arc of a story, the hero's journey, all of that is like, oh, of course, a hero wants something. They have to go through some challenge and obstacle to overcome, to become someone different, to then arrive at the other side and, [vocalization]. However, living that is really challenging for us. I remember the reason this really hit home for me recently is decades ago in the beginning, I really wanted to be a mountain guide. And I was working in outdoor retail and was apprenticing as a guide under a guide service and just couldn't wait to be like, that was gonna be my career. And then I would be out exploring the rugged blank spots on the map. And really at the time I just had a lot of internal grapple when that didn't come to be. And, you know, I thought that if at the time if I went into the business world that I was somehow going to lose my friendship with the heart of God because for growing up, I didn't really know anyone in business. The only few that I did know were not necessarily inspiring humans. And so I thought that the mountains was gonna be the way that I could, you know, become the person I'm intended to be. So as my wife and I began to have kids and I got a full-time job selling radio advertising and, you know, home by 5 PM for dinner and bedtime stories, my outdoor life shrunk substantially. And really at the time, I remember just, not only were we having a great time, but internally I just felt like, well, I guess I kind of misread the' tea leaves' there and, you know, oh, here we go, this is the story that's in front of me right now. And so maybe you're like me, maybe you really just prefer an A plus B equals C plan. The one that's linear, it's sequential, has predictable outcomes and only straight lines. And if you're like me, then maybe my friend Jon Blase's poem will help land this idea a little bit. He writes the same apparently. So he is talking about people with, you know, five-year plans, forged through life with a plan, a map they chart by bolder stars. I, on the other hand, wake to mild confusion, most days, not about the tiny aspects of self-respect, such as brushing my teeth and paying my bills, but more like the big things. Like my destiny, etc. Thanks, John. So for me, I'm not a celestial navigator either. But I do wake and this is I guess a path that I found to bring life. I do wake most days and start with radical surrender and asking God to accept the path that's in front of me for this day. There's a great writing by King David I'll add here too from Psalm 119, from The Message translation. And he says, "You're blessed when you stay on course, walking steadily on the road revealed by God. You're blessed when you follow His directions, doing your best to find Him. That's right you don't go off on your own. You walk straight along the road He sets." David White calls it the pale ground beneath our feet. So in this desire for straight unbroken lines, linear paths from A to B, and oftentimes just losing the path along the way of feeling like, well, I guess that was never to be, or I guess I misread the 'tea leaves', or I totally got that wrong and botched it, that'll never come to be. What I'm learning now, as I stare down age 50, that inclusive of all of my jagged lines, the cliff jumps, the plummets, the high places, unbroken lines as Wendell Berry writes, all have culminated in a story that I would love to tell you over a campfire sometime. That now here I am wholehearted, still friends with God. And now I'm finding myself accompanying clients in both the frontiers of business and wilderness settings. My conclusion is I've been led. So my invitation to you today, friends, is embrace your long way around. All of the squiggly lines, and allow yourself to be led. Because a great story, a good story is often not a straight line. You can do this. It's good for you. Keep going. Aaron

Friends, this is Aaron, and I've been thinking. I've been thinking about the slippery slope, the slippery slope of...as humans, as leaders, we find ourselves in a place progressively over time far from where we intended to be or accidentally just waking up one day and finding that we're in a place that no longer looks familiar or is no longer desirable. I've found myself on that slope many time. I just had a conversation with a friend this morning, and he was stating, after a year of really intentional work and changes in family, moved into a new home, found himself in a place of work rhythms, lifestyle rhythms that were unfamiliar and undesirable. Really not a place, like, "Why am I doing this? How did I get here?" And it's really helpful to know and have the awareness to start with. "Huh. This isn't working." Paying attention...what I talk about often is the dashboard lights of your life, and they start going off. For me, sometimes it happens in sleep where I notice, boy, I'm sure up a lot at 1 to 2:30 in the morning with lists of unfinished things in my head. Or, boy, I really notice that I'm way less patient than I wanna be, or I really notice that I'm finding the Zoom world of constantly switching of 30-minute or 60-minute blocks and the mental fatigue that that requires. I was just reading a book from Cal Newport on Deep Work, and he talked about how the mental...basically IQ points go down through the day from the progressive switching between topic and between task. That we actually become dumber effectively is what it means. So what do we do? What do we do when we find ourselves in a place where it isn't where we started, it's not where we intended to be, or, simply, where we want to be or what we want to be experiencing is something different than what we currently are. And I believe it usually, like, begins with two vocabulary words. One is starting to say yes to different things and say no to others. And those two words, yes and no, pulling those out, looking at those, one in our left hand, one in our right, and deciding, "Okay, now what are the mends and adjustments and trades I can make?" For myself, I notice this constant gravitational pull to say yes to more client work, to say yes to the next opportunity, to say yes to that next small thing. My wife was in a training program, and they called 'em, "The big things that you put in a bowl are oranges. The small things you put in a bowl are Skittles." And it's much easier to have a bowl that you start with oranges in than it is to start with a bowl, fill it full of Skittles, and then try and shove the oranges in. And oranges being figurative for the things, the big, juicier, meatier, chunkier pieces of your commitments, your yeses and then moving into, then, adding the small bits around those big blocks. So for me, personally, I find it really fatiguing when I end up with a bowl full of Skittles of just tons of little bitty penny ante small things I'm doing. And for me, as I learn to lead myself, learn to lead others, the impact I seek to create has to do with fewer yeses to Skittles, more no to those small little things, and stronger...my friend called them "straight spine" and "open heart" yeses, where the oranges are easier to place in, so that I don't find myself on down the road fatigued and surprised of the results of the impact of my experience of my work and my life and, in the end, finding myself on the slippery slope in some place I don't intend to be or choose not to be. So start with a yes. Figure out where those yeses need to be invested fully, and then where are some of the noes. I just, before recording this episode, said no to two separate invitations,so that I can keep the integrity of the yeses that I'd formally already committed to. You can do this, friends. Keep going. This is good for you. Aaron

Friends, this is Aaron. And I've been thinking. I've been thinking about to-do lists versus to-be lists. One of my mentors these last few years introduced me to the idea of a to-be list. I really shook my head at first. Like you mean like to be, as in like to be and to not be? What do you mean, to be? Well, she went on to talk about how each of us have, like, a to-do list, you know, shit-we've-got-to-get-done list, things that we want to make a difference in, things we need to accomplish, deadlines, timelines, deliverables. Great. But have we ever, have I, have you ever stopped to start with a daily to-be list? I kid you not, I remember months ago, I wrote down in the morning my to-be list. I wanna be patient, I wanna be open, I wanna be a non-reactive presence. And within 2 hours, maybe it was 60 minutes, it was short, I found myself with a client live and the client on the other end of Zoom, we were in a breakout room and we were doing this game, I pushed on the wrong tile button on this maze experience that we were doing, and it was my error, but the client really got animated. We came back into the big breakout room and the client in a tile full of Brady Bunch people of a hundred, said, "I blame you." And I thought, oh my, okay, here we go. Thank goodness I have a to-be list because I want to be a non-reactive presence. I had an opportunity to practice that, and if it wasn't for my to-be list of the day, then I wouldn't have had that orientation already in my operating system around who do I wanna be, how do I want to be today. My list for today, I want to be a mountaineer, I want to be a reader, I want to be a lover, a brother, a deep creator, I want to be a runner, an artist. What will I do with these today? Only time will tell. Very helpful to accompany my to-do list, who I want to be, and how I want to be. Friends, you can do this. Keep going. This is good for you. Aaron

Today I want to share something more intimate with you about pain and living forward. Earlier this year, my family and I we honored the 10-year anniversary of our daughter Hadley's passing and her death in 2011. And I found myself for a couple months, just feeling the... I don't even know if weight is the right word, but just the honoring of the reality of learning to live each of us individually and collectively as a family how to live forward. How to actually move forward. And it's definitely become easier by the year but doesn't mean the the pain or the loss is not there. It's just a new way of learning to live holding both joy and pain at the same time. So I wanna share with you a poem that I wrote. Her birthday is upcoming. This month I always tend to be reflective as well. And our holiday seasons are always bookended by her birthday and then her anniversary of her passing. I'll share the poem with you now and then reflect on it a little bit with you, 10 years living forward,   "Ten rings later in the oak tree. Ten rings later and the oak tree. Radius etchings tell the truth of living forward. Closer to fine. Empty bedroom, not to dinner. Quiet, deafening, disappearance. No search party assembled. Empty wheelchair affixed for helium flight. Unconvincing logic to limbic smells and sounds. Was that her shadow? Her cry? Hair clippers to mourn the reminder of not fine. Staggering, limping, walking, living again, rings seared chronicles of summers laughing. Winters ruminating, springs living. All the roots go deeper when it's dry." So as I reflect back on her death in passing, I envision this trees aging rings, a cross section of a log. And as you see like in the rings, each annual etching tells a different story. Some are like thick with growth. In a tree, it's like, "Oh wow, there must have been a lot of rain that year, was lots of moisture, easy for that tree to grow." Others are really thin, very small amount of growth, but the tree is still standing. And as I began to reflect on that as her passing, no search party assembled, she was missing at dinner. Her bedroom was empty. But we knew why. In our mind. But our soul and our body didn't. Our limbic brain, the part of our brain that stores meaning, and sense, and smell aroused by someone's presence. I remember just being haunted by that for years, "Oh, it sounded like her. Oh, that's not her. Was that her cry? No." And in the honoring of her passing, I had read a passage in the book of Job. And when Job's children had died, so many tragedies had become him. But it was the last straw when the house collapsed on all of his children. And the two things he did was he shaved his head and worship God. I remember having my kids, Averi and Holden, shave my head with me. And I wore my hair clipper down to skin for a year, just to remind myself, I'm not fine, and that's okay, but have a visceral reminder. I would go to touch my head in the morning and it would have these, you know, scaly bumps from no hair, or I'd be cold, or I looked not attractive in the mirror. But all of those were reminders. That's okay. I'm not supposed to be fine. And then as we progressed, moving through summers laughing, winters ruminating, and springs living, moving from staggering and limping to walking to living again, and all the roots go deeper when it's dry. So, friends, like you, I've lived long enough to know to live authentically, to become wholehearted requires us to embrace our humanities spectrum, and remind our souls that God is with us and for us, even when, even when. Friends, you can do this. It's worth it. You're worth it. Keep going, Aaron  

Friends, today what's on my mind is piercing the veneer of outside things. Ernest Shackleton, infamous Antarctic explorer, at the turn of the century, the 19th century, did this expedition in Antarctica. His men famously were trapped in the sea ice over 23 months, they found their way back home, each of them living. And in his memoirs, he wrote called "South,“ I'll share with you, two sentences. "We had pierced the veneer of outside things. We had reached the naked soul of men." I find this particular piece, the veneer, this... I remember in shop class as a kid in high school adding like a coating of veneer, a lacquer on top of whatever it was, we were creating. So veneer can be like a barrier, right? It could be thin, could be thick, could be many-layered, but how do we pierce the veneer of outside things? And I find often in our world that we live in, this modern world, the veneer of outside things exist in polished half-truths, phrases that I don't love like, "Oh, how you doing?" "Oh, I'm great. So busy, so busy," we say. Operating at 7,000 RPMs, drop the merit badge of busy and pierce the veneer. Real connection, real belonging, real community exists in the deeper textures. It's not on your phone. It's not on the flip. It's not in busy. Be whole, be intentional, be on purpose, reach the naked soul. You can do this, friends. This is good for you. Let's keep going, Aaron

Friends, I've been thinking, I've been thinking about dreaming bigger dreams. A friend of mine sent me a poem in the mail, a prayer over the summer. I've kept, keep going back and rereading these lines. And it reads, "Disturb me, Lord, when I am too well, pleased with myself, when my dreams have come true, because I have dreamed too little." So as I asked myself and wonder about these lines, what are my new dreams? Not the old, the vintage ones of yesteryear. What are the bashful whispers? The ones too big to say out loud. What if we whispered them with intuition? With heart, without knowing how? What if we speak it into the reality of the world as our prayer? We take it as a cue of the opening line of, "Disturb me Lord, when I am too well, pleased with myself, when my dreams have come true, because I have dreamed too little." Friends, danger is calling, danger is for good. Speak those dreams, those whispers, and let's begin to live into the questions of how might we bring bigger dreams to life? Friends, this is good for us. You can do this. It's worth it. Keep going, Aaron

Friends, I've been thinking about what does the world really need? Our world is pretty complex, complicated place these days, no matter what part of the globe you live on. And I've been thinking about how what the world really needs is more wholehearted humans. Two quotes to get us started. Parker Palmer. "I wanted more than a job. I wanted deeper congruence between my inner and outer life." Congruence in that is about the who I am. My friend calls it a plum line, between who I am, what I think, feel and do, and they're all lined up. So let me read it again to you. "I wanted more than a job. I wanted deeper congruence between my inner and outer life." Second quote, Andrew Bennett. The longest journey you will ever take. "The longest journey you will ever take is the 18 inches from your head to your heart." So friends, if we desire more than just a job, our vocational experience and existence becoming more than just showing up with our butt in a chair, all present for roll call. If we desire our neighborhoods when I hear people say, oh, I've never talked to my neighbor. I don't know who my neighbors are. I'm like, well, have you ever actually walked over and knocked on their door and said hi? And if we dared a dream beyond this transactional interchange of relationship, the mini-dramas, and small living. The way I see it, there's really only one choice. The courageous choice, the more challenging, fulfilling choice is put your money down, buy the golden ticket of congruence and the plum line that runs through you and buckle up for the mysterious beauty and mess of discovering how to foster friendship of heart and head, that 18 inches. What if your friends of head and heart were deeply part of how you live and who you are? And how do we cultivate a deep knowing of God as our friend? Here's a promise. There's no quick shortcut, VIP line to skip ahead. And oh, by the way, this one alluded me for a long time. There's also not a finish line. We'll never be done. When we begin to embrace living more wholeheartedly in the world that we occupy. What does the world need? More of us to sign up, buy the ticket, wear the t-shirt, and get started living more true, restored friends with our heart and our head, friends with God, and deeper congruence between our inner and outer life. Friends, it is good for us, I bought the ticket. You can do this. Let's keep going. Aaron

Friends, I've been thinking about an idea that David Whyte wrote about. He titled it "The Economy of Presence." And he told the story in his book about this old sheepdog, Cymro in the Welsh countryside, and this dog, older of the bunch with limp, had a blind eye. He talked about how one ear's flopped over, one ear that's up is raised and black. And he had this what he titled as "The Economy of Presence," that he could stand... He could do the job with the lightest touch, he writes. He knew the pivotal places to stand. And he told the story about how the young sheepdogs would run up and back, lots of noise, lots of activity, lots of energy expended, in order to get the sheep to move where they wanted them to go. Contrast that with the older, wiser, somewhat haggard, Cymro, through his economy of presence, knowing the pivotal places to stand, said he could do it with the lightest touch, the pivotal places to do the job with the lightest touch. So he could lean, he could move ahead, he could tilt, he could stand in the right place at the right time in the right way and have the same or better result. And the sheep would respond. And they would go through this crack or segment in the wall where they could punch through. I've been thinking about this for ourselves as leaders, as the wholehearted leaders, what would it look like for us to perform the job with the lightest touch, to know where are the pivotal places to stand? Not everywhere, not up and back, not scurrying and hurrying but to be in the right place, at the right time, and in the right way. I can admit for myself I don't yet know. I don't know where all those places are but I know that every new practice, every new integration starts in the moment of asking the question, in this now moment with this team that I'm spending time with, with this conversation, with this project, with this deliverable. Where is there an opportunity for the lightest touch, a lesser touch, and an economy of presence? You could do this, friends. Keep going. This is good for us. Aaron

Today I've been thinking about developing an everyday muscle. I've been 600 days and counting now in this life experiment. So it feels like it's time to share it with you. So I've always wanted to be more consistent. Like, I would call like stone colds just steady. The person who like, skips all of the fussing and excuses, mini-dramas for why I do or don't do things consistently. And the truth is I've always probably found ways to overcome a lack of consistency by just, you know, fits and starts, or like, talent, you know, I could like delay, you know, if it's a deadline or whatever it may be. In that spirit, I've always wanted to be the guy who would just show up, do the work and kind of enough said. Instead, I've been the guy in the past with lengthy explanations mostly to myself. So at the beginning of the pandemic, I decided to run a life experiment and it was inspired by two things I wanna tell you about. And that's my son and his now six years of sobriety and the work of James Clear, he wrote a book called "Atomic Habits". And then just a third input as well I also had a friend doing this exact same experiment that he had already completed one year. So those trio inputs kind of came together. James Clear book was really helpful it's this idea of starting with tiny habits. How do you embed and adopt new habits in your life? Lots of books out there on habits, this one just plain and simply culminated in time and attention and I found it incredibly helpful. Here are a couple of punchlines from his book that I found really incredibly useful in this. How do we grow an everyday muscle is become 1% better over time, not 10%, 5%. Make the new habit so small you can't fail. Never miss twice. And then root your new habit or practice in an identity statement. My new habit, my tiny practice, my everyday muscle is about running. I started running one mile a day and it was rooted in I want to be an everyday runner. Inspiration number two, my son had just crossed over five years sober at the time, I believe. My wife had gone through and totaled up the number of days he had not in his community they call it drugging and drinking. He had not drugged and drank for over 2000 days. And I was reflecting on that like, oh my gosh, I couldn't think of anything I've done for 15 days, 200 days, let alone 2000 every single day without fail. I was even thinking about brushing my teeth. Do I actually brush my teeth every single day? No. There's some Saturdays and Sundays where I'm home, where I'm like, yeah, I never brushed my teeth today. So this idea of how might I become more like my son with who has this strength of sobriety in his life around this everyday muscle? And how might I embed that in my life as a person without excuse, but just moves forward with purpose and action and choice to develop this interior strength. So this big idea was what if without fail, I just start a new practice every day. I'll run one mile a day. And in your case, insert whatever new habit you might consider. And for me, the one mile, the reason it was important was it's not two, it's not six, many days I run longer than a mile. But just the every day of get up, move my body, get going, and log it. I think I'm 603, 604 days in my practice. And have had that do some modifications here and there. If I'm in the backcountry with a backpack, you know, as long as it's three miles or longer, I count that. I don't actually physically have to run, but when they, my family and I were sick a year ago, we all, I made sure I got out, even if it was pathetically short. We've mixed it up with some, what do we call? Our chugging run one evening with some buddies, it was drink a beer run a mile on repeat, just to make it fun. And in the end, what I've found is now one mile I've become 1% better over time by starting small. I have never missed twice. I have a little habit tracker app. I'll put in the show notes for how to do that. And there's a component around accountability That's really important as well. And then my identity now includes becoming an everyday runner and that I am a runner. I am consistent. Which then also helps feed not only my physical body, but it also is a jumping-off point for other places in my life of like, look, well, I started that new thing. I have that everyday muscle in that way. What if I broke something down so small, you can't fail. Turn it into never miss twice and adopt a new practice that's rooted in something I want to become. Someone I want to become. So friends, developing an everyday muscle, if that's for you, if you have a curiosity. My wife is some 580 days in on her own experiment of walking every day for 6 minutes. So it doesn't have to be revolutionary. Yeah, whatever it may be. There's been lots of people that have adopted these practices. They're very contagious. Once you start in your respective communities, outlining what you're up to. You can do this. It's worth it. Keep going, Aaron

Friends, I've been thinking about writing it down by hand instead. In this world of digital texts, instant messages, DMs, emails, screenshots, emojis, and all kinds of other stuff that I don't even know what they are. What if we took out a piece of paper, a pen, tear out a page in a magazine. Locate your favorite stationery, go to a card store and buy a card. And what if you...I use maps all the time. I use maps from wilderness places I've been, national parks that I visit, I keep all those maps and use them, and hand write down your thoughts, your appreciations, your birthday wishes, and goodbyes. Years ago, a friend of ours shared his homemade birthday card with me and he said, I make all of my cards. I remember just thinking, what? You do what? Like, that's cool. As a result, I don't know that I've actually purchased a birthday card since. Even started, I bought this little digital printer where it prints your photos from your phone in little like sticker size, little like two by twos with a sticky back. So I've even started using those to hand-make cards. And, specifically birthday cards just recently for our family members all in October. So I went through and last month just scribe notes and went through writing letters on these topographic maps to a friend of ours in a trauma program in recovery. And what I found is these handwritten words, they create physical artifacts to reside in our lives. That the connection in this always-on, always programmed world, that we live in, we write it down by hand, serves as a reminder of being loved, being seen for who we are, how we want to be in the world, and enabling for others to feel seen as well. Friends, live bravely and write it down, write it by hand to bring more life with others. You can do this. Keep going, Aaron

Friends, I've been thinking, what can you not not do? Parker Palmer writes, "Vocation at its deepest level. This is something I can't not do, for reasons I'm unable to explain to anyone else, and don't fully understand myself, that that are nonetheless compelling." I love that. Such a generous, expansive invitation for us to consider, what can we not do? I can't help myself. What's the thing you find yourself thinking, exploring, without prompt or obligation? A friend of mine recently told me that he cannot not photograph bacteria. Like what? Come again. He was telling me about how he, my friend Rob, he discovered these galaxies in this like do it yourself home petri dishes. And he was literally like unable to stop himself. So he documented his work in a children's book for his daughter. How fantastic is that? So where are we compelled for reasons we do not understand even to ourself? What I love about this is that we get absolved of the necessity to explain. We don't need to attempt to explain why it's sensible or it's not. Why we're qualified or we should. What we're gonna do about it or not. We just get thrust into feeling compelled and paying attention to what is compelling us forward. When I apply this question for myself, I'm compelled for reasons I do not fully understand and cannot explain a good reason for helping humans thrive. Recharging my mind and soul in wilderness and wild places to go first, down unknown paths to extract and excavate my interior life onto pen, paper, and audio and share it here with you, which is perplexing at times. And to make maps, like a cartographer, documenting the typography, edges of the frontier, and business of the heart in spiritual life with God. I want to close with one more quote from Frederick Buechner, "When we think of these things that compel us, we're unable to explain to ourselves, what if the place that God calls us, you, is to the place where your deep gladness and the world's deep hunger meet? So what is it that you cannot do? You can't help yourself from being curious about? And might it be in that place of deep gladness, it actually meets a world with deep hunger." Friends, this is good for you. This is good for us. Let's keep going, Aaron

Friends, I've been thinking about the words of Saint Paul. He wrote this simple couple sentences that I've been meditating on for the last year and revisiting. He writes, "Make a careful exploration, make a careful exploration of who you are and the work you have been given, and sink yourself into that. Don't be impressed with yourself. Don't compare yourself with others. Each of you must take responsibility for doing the creative best you can with your own life." I found that, what is that? Four sentences? Five sentences? Incredibly disruptive, incredibly expansive, incredibly life-giving. And what I found is, even the first few lines, words, make a careful exploration of who you are. Wow, careful, explore. This question of, "Well, who am I? Like, who am I made to be?" I believe we are intimately designed and created and so in that, we don't come with a operator's manual. It's like when you buy a new TV or computer, you get the user guide. Well, there isn't one specifically for each one of us, we have to discover and make a careful exploration of how we operate when we're at our best, who we are, how we're uniquely created and designed, how our life has formed us, how our experiences have formed us and the choices that we've made. And that we are continuing to make of who we are and who we want to be and how we operate in the world. I find that to be a very poignant choice is to be intentional about those things or pretend that they're just happy accidents. And the work you've been given and sink yourself into that. I find so interesting that work is so much of our context in what we do, whether it's folding laundry, cutting grass, as a math teacher, as a physician, as a mom, as a CPA, as a bookkeeper, a retail checkout person in the sporting goods section. What is the work that we've been given today? The work that's in front of us today. The work as a nurse, the work as a consultant, the work as a salesperson, the work as a bank teller, the work as a mom. What is the work that's been given to us today? And sink yourself into that. So don't go left or right. Don't go searching. Don't go wandering, just sink yourself fully into today. And then in case you forget, don't be impressed with yourself. Advice from St. Paul. Don't think your shit don't stink. I have a buddy of mine that I think of. We talk about often about not taking the line, as you progress in your career often you end up with a short line, oh, this friend of mine had told this story to me of when he became a senior executive, then he was at a cocktail party and he was waiting in the long line. And then this woman came up to him and said, "Oh, Mr. so-and-so, that's not the line for executives come with me." And we were talking about how easy it is to slowly become impressed with yourself, to slowly think you're a big deal, to slowly believe you're better than others. Paul continues, "And don't compare yourself with others." I find that incredibly helpful. I play that game so often in my head, comparing myself with other people. And it's entirely unfruitful because each of us must take responsibility for doing the creative best we can with our own life. So what does it look like to take responsibility for doing the creative best we can today in this life? The one we have today, in the place we live today, with the neighbors we live next to, with the people that we lead and love, those entrusted to our care, with the responsibilities that we have, with the accountabilities that are ours. How do we do the creative best we can with our own life today? Friends, keep going. This is good for us. This will enhance, yeah, the relationships in our life. The work that we do, the impact we create, and the intimacy we seek. Thank you, Saint Paul. Kingdom come. Keep going, Aaron

In today's episode, I want you to meet my friend and Flamenco dancer Ana Lucia Jardim. I want to share with you a tiny moment when she and her trio shared the beautiful art of Flamenco with a room full of work colleagues in San Francisco. I knew this was a moment to savor, so I pulled out my phone, recorded the audio of their music, singing and dancing, and a year later, reflected together, and here's what she shared. Special thanks and acknowledgement to singer, Roberto Zamora http://robertozamora.com/index.html and David McLean https://www.davidmclean.net/ Flamenco Guitarist and Composer, Todd Anderson our producer and Ana Lucia Jardim our wise guide. I'm signing off here for this year to resume again in early 2021. To all a Merry Christmas and Happy Holiday. Keep going. You can do this.

In the last person standing town, Scott Teems makes his home in Los Angeles, with a passion for telling stories through film. As a Hollywood and television writer and director, Scott Teems shares with us today on Work Life Play, the importance of showing up every day and why you need someone in your corner who believes in you.We talk about his life as a Hollywood and television writer and director, why most people quit sooner (and don’t go the distance), the supporting people, namely his wife TJ, and properly calibrated expectations to pursue big dreams. Scott brings us in close to educating us about how a film comes together from casting, location scouting, screenwriting, editing, and securing funding for a movie. Watch for Scott Teem’s upcoming Big screen studio works Halloween Kills (sequel to Halloween releasing the Fall of 2021. He wrote Firestarter, Stephen King adaptation, starring Zac Efron which begins shooting in 2021 releasing in 2022.

Matthew Zachary is my guest today for the audacious role he plays in the fight against cancer. Personally, this topic is significant to me. For most of the past two years, I’ve invested my client work energy supporting a major pharmaceutical organization as they re-imagine, re-engineer their approach to cure cancer and extend the lives of patients. Matthew’s founded Stupid Cancer, a brain cancer survivor himself, Newsweek calls him a Cancer Rebel, Deepak Chopra says he’s a Peace healer. Now his podcast, Out of Patients-sorting out the BS in healthcare through raw conversations about patient advocacy. I dedicate this episode to Peb and Bill, my friends. May you keep going further.

Years ago, I believed that my "real life" went on pause when my responsibilities took over. For instance, when I traveled for work, my "life" was paused while I fulfilled my work duty. This limiting mindset, the lenses through which I interpreted my life, informed my narrow experience of my life. Everything was in a container. Open this container when I "Work," this container when I "Play." This old mindset prevailed when traveling for work; I believed that I was away from my "real life," The trip was a necessary interruption, but inconveniently pausing my experience of living my life. I now believe that I choose to live my life regardless of where I find myself in context and geography. It is all one beautifully integrated creation of my Work Life Play. In today's episode, another from the archives a few years back, I started running small experiments, fully living my life as I desired wherever I found myself, despite the context and limitations. The big unlock was that my life no longer needed to go on hold.

In this Tiny Moment, Big Idea I ask the question "What are you afraid to try?" I recorded this episode five years ago immediately after we sold everything we owned and rebooted our lives. Many people said, "I wish I could do that." Which begs the question, "what are you afraid to try or do?" Maybe that informs what you might need to consider? Keep going,  Aaron

My interview today is with my son Holden. Sober five years. Wise. Gracious, and he’s teaching me a lot about the power of building an everyday muscle. He talks about how he makes decisions waiting for nudges from “Higher Power” and his brave beginnings of sobriety.

Today’s episode is a tiny moment with a big idea. Three years ago this month, I left my fifteen-year-long career in Software, stepped down as an executive, forfeited stock options, and embarked on a quest, a mission, to align the work I do every day with the person I’d become. I jumped in our 74 VW Bus and headed west to honor the beginning of this big transition in my life. Here’s what I captured then, not knowing what would unfold. 20/20 vision is easier to find when looking into the rearview mirror—but challenging when we’re in the beginning or middle of significant transitions, living with uncertainty and great frontier of the unknown.

My friend Ryan Miller is fierce with questions. Questions about love, questions about life and story, and power and shadows. The question we came together around in this episode is what is happening in our culture’s shadows today. In the movie The Usual Suspects, Kevin Spacey, said, “The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world he did not exist.” Ryan Miller’s new fictional story, Insipid, questions it all-good and evil, what is real and what is not. Dark and bright, join us.

Liz Warner completed her goal during the pandemic on June 8th, 2020, her 30th birthday. Thirty marathons, in thirty countries by age thirty-that, was her quest. Here’s her story of navigating setbacks along the road of illuminating that each of us can contribute to the ongoing play.

Earlier this year, I recorded this life changing advice from my Uber driver. Buckle up and enjoy his zeal for life and this powerful tiny moment and big idea.

Zack Duhame is unassuming. You would walk past him on the sidewalk and not realize that thirty minutes ago, he was a stunt double for Brad Pitt or Leonardo DiCaprio being drug behind a car, winning a bar fight, or being drug behind a getaway car. Zack and I met in the mountains of Colorado at a men's retreat. For the weekend, a house rule was we didn't speak about our careers. For men, an easy facade to hide behind. We spent four intense days together, getting to know the human being, not the human doing (career and accomplishments). Many months later, we reconnected, and the great reveal "Zack the stuntman?!!!" The best part is we became friends organically. Please get to know Zack Duhame with me. Watch his adrenaline reeling stunt reel here.

I took a break from producing and delivery for a few weeks to rest and recharge. Farmers call this fallow ground-replenish soil. “…some farmers and gardeners let their land go fallow – or unplanted – so that the soil’s natural nutrient balance can be restored…it became more and more unpopular to leave land fallow and unproductive in Western societies. The production won out over soil health. ” I'm starting a new Explorers Wanted program (virtually) and in-person starting October 5th. Details here https://www.aaronmchugh.com/explorerswanted/

Doug Ament doesn't have all of the answers, but he asks excellent questions. In the heyday of the late '90s, he was a partner in the San Diego based most successful yacht dealerships in the World. Until it all went sideways, and they shut it down. His lessons provide us anchor points for how to navigate uncertainty when we lose sight of the shore in life and business. In this episode Doug Ament walks us through how he survived the 2008/09 professional downturn.

My guest today is songwriter Jeff Nelson. I discovered Jeff's earthy soul talk after reading about "LA contractor lands a Nashville recording contract. He is a family man who purchased and remodeled his grandfather’s home in San Pedro, where he currently resides with his wife and four children. He leads a humble life: coffee, family, building homes and good bourbon." And I knew I had to hear his story. Enjoy his intersecting art and labor, soul and play, unlock and duty.

Ryan Gottfredson PHD is a successful mindset expert. Mindsets as the lenses we wear to help us interpret and engage with the world. In our conversation, we talk about how we expand and shift mindsets limiting our experience and no longer serving us. 

My guest today, Zack Friedman recognized a pattern in humans. Some people create lemonade from lemons and others don't. His book, The Lemonade Life, is the playbook for how to choose a pathway that eludes many, and can lead to more fulfillment and success.

Sunni Brown is an inspiration. She helped me exercise my wierd. After many years of trading messages, I'm proud to share our conversation with you today. One of my favorite quotes from Sunni I included in my book “If you can’t change your mind, it’s very hard to change your life. Human beings that are mentally agile, those who can and will unstick—from an ongoing challenge, a mindset, a limiting belief, or a point of view—are more likely to flourish. Period.”

Brendan Leonard promises that real adventure is not out of reach. I discovered his work through The Art of Getting Lost, a get-out-there excuse removing antidote to exploring more. He writes, “The hardest thing is convincing yourself it’s okay. Now I know you’re important at work and at home, but trust me, the folks at work and at home can do without you for a day or a couple of days. You’d be surprised what people do when you’re unavailable for a day or two: They figure it out on their own. It’s easy to get stuck in a rut where you’re working hard for everyone else and neglecting the things you want and need-like spending the night sleeping under the stars or going for a long hike-so you have to recognize it and schedule some time out of the rut for yourself.” Friends, Brendan Leonard is a worthy guide to follow in the art of getting lost and doing work you love. Find his work at Semi-Rad.

Dave Evans and Bill Burnett are designers at heart. Early in their careers, they designed for companies like Apple. Today, as Life Designers, they show people how to get off the couch and prototype alternative versions of their lives and their careers. 

Moe believes that Bravespace workplaces enable for people to face the risks, emotional exposure, uncertainty, and vulnerability that come with work. Leaders must know that people aren't machines, but that we are strong and fragile, smart, complex and beautiful. Bravespace workplaces are people-centered environments where leaders deeply understand that people make all the good things happen at work.

Morgan Snyder is more than my guest today. Our sixteen-year friendship is an anchor I repeatedly tether myself to for hope, truth, and joy. Our transformative reciprocity began when we were angsty younger men in our thirties. We'd commiserate together. Now we celebrate. To relieve anxiety, we'd pedal bikes in sync to reset our life's drive train. Our strategy? To conjure more energy, with an improved approach to come through for everyone except ourselves. Now we prioritize our soul's needs, joyfully contributing with wisdom's restraint in fewer places. Mashing those Colorado hills, Morgan was dictating his book aloud on how we can become the kind of man that God can entrust with power. He started with one question, "What's the most important thing?". This book isn't for everyone, Becoming a King: The Path to Restoring the Heart of a Man. Who is this book for? It's for the hungry, curious, and humble enough to admit maybe there is a better way? A less-traveled path that leads to abundant, sustainable life? If you're a man who values questions over answers and journeys over destinations, this book can change your life. I've walked and witnessed Morgan's excavation (a term you'll hear him use in almost every conversation) as a man, husband, father, employee, and friend. Before his inside-out restoration, restoring the heart of a man, he was intense. Today, he's still where he was unsettled and his winsome love and oxygenated Life with God is disarming and inviting. -To the devout cynics, his warm "me too" rebel smile creates a safe zone to drop your guard. -To the weary, he shows his scars underneath his flannel sleeves. -To the polished and perfect, his empathetic, inquisitive engagement illuminates possible hairline cracks in the foundation. For the few, the curious and open, there is a path that leads to life and few find it. Morgan is a trustworthy guide to this ancient path. Follow him. I do.

I'll be the first to admit. I can be easily distracted. Ping, blue dot, check email, etc. Nir Eyal named my interference as pain management. "Unless we deal with the root causes of our distraction, we'll continue to find ways to distract ourselves. Simply put, the drive to relieve discomfort is the root cause of all our behavior." I invite you to put aside your biases and assumptions about distraction and listen to Nir Eyal's research on how to become Indistractable.

My guest today on Work Life Play is Caitlin Landesberg, founder and CEO of Sufferfest Beer Company, for those who believe in earning their beer. Caitlin Landesberg is an Athlete, long-distance trail runner, and is relentlessly curious. We talk about living fully, pursuing wormholes with curiosity and abandoning demands for outcomes. Her disarming charm, tech-startup roots tenacity kneaded the gospel of Sufferfest Beer one finish line and neighborhood grocery story at a time. Here is her story.

My guest today is Canadian Andrew Jensen, PGA pro tour golfer and avid spokesman for the pitfalls and hope for those of us who struggle with depression and anxiety. "I turned pro and embarked on just this lonely, isolated life and isolation is not good for the depressed brain." Rich, earnest and real. I know you'll enjoy his story today. 

In 2018, I interviewed Bryan Falchuk, author of Do a Day: How to Live a Better Life Everyday. What struck me about Bryan was how his lowest-life moment, became his redefining inspiration. Here’s what he had to say, “I walked into our room and my wife’s in bed, my son’s standing there and he’s looking at his mother who’s dying in front of his eyes and he turns and looks at me and it all smacked me in the face. It’s like, ’what are you doing? You’re failing her. You’re failing him. And I’m feeling ‘why do I have to have such a miserable life,’ everything’s falling apart and somehow I’m still standing and I’m not homeless and I’m not, missing a limb or, some other much more extreme thing. So maybe it’s not as bad as I always am so insistent that it is and all that just hit me in that moment.”

What is the Cult of Average? Today, my friend and guest Tom Davis liberates our thinking by guiding us to a values-based operating system for our lives. A ‘pay the rent’ lifestyle is one that is based on living life for other people. It's about paying the rent, paying my bills, going to my job, doing what everybody else tells me. What happens is, slowly but surely, I start to erode away. I start to disappear because the things that matter to me, my core values, the ‘why I do what I do,’ there is no time for them anymore. There's no me because I'm just trying to survive. That's the problem with survival mode; all you're doing is getting through the day. You go home and you collapse and say, "I was so busy working, but what did I actually do that mattered?"

Usually, I wouldn't write an introduction to a podcast episode that I am the "guest" or the speaker. But hey, this is the best talk I've ever given at my new book launch party on February 1st, Fire Your Boss: Discover Work Your Love Without Quitting Your Job, What makes that accurate? Ninety of some of my favorite humans on the planet were in the room transferred to me through osmosis, and I gained strength as the evening unfolded. Which meant I spoke with boldness and brightness that I long to embody daily. The second and equally equitable, I love people. Deeply. I love the hearts, minds, and lives of people in the daily context of the world of work. My big heart and my decades of living on the front-lines of enterprise corroborate my assignment as a watchman to our hearts arousing at work.

Alastair Humphreys is unusual. He cycled around the world (46,000 miles) and rowed across the Atlantic Ocean unsupported. Those feats are unusual, but more accessible for the commoner are his microadventures, short, local, burts of curious wanderings out your front door. I'd pair beautiful and unusual together to give a crisper coupling of his leadership invitation to each of us "Live Adventurously". Motivational speaker, Author, and Good Human, Alastair is the real deal.

Peb Jackson is uncommonly attracted to risk and survival. Today at age 75 it remains true-it's in his bones. We talk about learning to empty yourself, living an adventurous life of the heart and in wild places where blank spots on the map still exist. 

Leith McHugh, my lovely wife of 26 years, is in the house today on the Work Life Play podcast. She's up to some amazing things in the world. We talk about "How McHugh's Roll" and the importance of inviting our children into our family ethos. She shares about her LEITH brand, and the coaching work she brings to women focused on identity and story.

My guest today on Work Life Play is Ultrarunner, Author, mom, and Outside contributing editor Katie Arnold. Katie's book, Running Home serves as the backdrop for our conversation, "A memoir about grief, motherhood, adventure, and finding your stride".  

Today. Closing the gap between where I was and where I am. Choices. Tradeoffs. Grace. Reboot. Start. Rest. Pray. Reflect. Celebrate. My book goes live today into the world. A decade ago, I sat on my back patio and wrote the first draft of this liberating idea for Firing My Boss. My life changed that day. Not all at once, but it sparked the beginning of a journey. I remember deciding to make that manifesto available in a print self-published version. A friend asked, "why self-publish?" Me, "I don't want to wait to be picked". I had something inside of me that I had to get out and I didn't want the world of publishing to be the "committee" for deciding if my words lived. Available wherever books are sold including in Barnes and Noble stores (In stock in select stores).

Wake up to your life. It’s time to make a ruckus at work. Hi friends, new and old, after 10 years of soulful wrestle, iteration and innovation, I’m excited to announce the release of my new book. Fire your boss-discovering work you love without quitting your job is about becoming wholehearted. Yes it’s about work, and it’s about living true in all that you create in the world. Check it out anywhere books are sold. Keep going-Aaron *Join my 2020 Analog experiment

The Far Green Country, a documentary film about RV living in the national parks, marriage, and parenting. Eli Pyke shares his story of he and his family living in an RV for a year as they reset their lives.

Our world is fast-paced, being everything to everyone at all times (except to ourselves), and the demands of our modern world aren't sustainable if we don't learn to listen to our body, mind, and spirit to excel in our life, work and relationships. Here is Jen Fisher's story of burning out and today leads as the Managing Director of Well-Being at Deloitte consulting.

Today's interview is with Blaine and Sam Eldredge with And Son's Magazine. We talk about their eight-year dream of creating a print magazine, the power of transformation v.s. entertainment, masculinity as a lens by which we can view everything else, in defense of millennials, the joy of words, vulnerability and going first, the temptation to quit, brotherhood and hearing God's voice.

Which relationships bring you life? Do you know which relationships drain your energy? Begin by mapping your relationships across your work and life to gain insight about where you need to invest your time and energy. 

What do you value most, not your stuff, but deeper than the stuff you own?

Today's podcast is from session #1 from Reboot Live last October 2017. Last year, we held two Reboot Experience Workshop and took people on an inward journey to answer big questions like what do you want in life? And How do I find my path to a well-lived joyful life?