Podcasts about barnes and noble

Special replay from February 10th's live webinarRise is Back! Get your tickets while they last! - Live Events!!Upgrade to the Ad Free Premium Podcast Experience - https://rachelhollis.supercast.comRachel challenges the idea that motivation is the key to change, arguing that motivation is fleeting and often leads to shame when goals slip, especially when people use harsh self-talk, comparison, or other unhealthy tactics to “get motivated.” She explains that real progress comes from routines, habits, and ritual—showing up for your life every day in ways that fit your real circumstances, including mid-level days and hard days influenced by stress, hormones, or life seasons.Get your copy of Rachel's Book Here: Audible, Amazon, Barnes & Noble, Books-A-Millon, Bookshop.org, or wherever books are sold!00:00 Show Up Every Day (Without Hustle): Aligning With Your Future Self01:04 Welcome + Intention for a Perspective Shift02:30 Rachel's Background: 15 Years of Personal Development Lessons03:35 Why Goal-Setting Culture Creates Shame (The Motivation Trap)06:18 Motivation Fades—Build Routines, Habits, and Rituals Instead08:07 Great Days, Bad Days, and the ‘Middle' Where We Get Stuck12:37 Toxic Motivation Tactics: Self-Hate, Caffeine, and Comparison17:42 Personal Story: Diet Culture, Binge Cycles, and Why ‘It Works' Doesn't Last24:27 Business Example: Stop Waiting for the Market—Hope Isn't a Strategy27:00 The Red-Things Exercise: You See What You're Looking For (Choose Your North Star)30:05 Make Change Automatic: What If Growth Was as Easy as Brushing Your Teeth?30:55 Your Weird Little Habits: Nose-Blowing, Sleep Positions & Chapstick Rituals32:46 Why Habits Feel Mandatory: Triggers, Cues & The Power of Habit34:18 The Framework Starts Here: Stop Relying on Motivation35:49 Goal Type #1: The ‘One Thing' That Changes Everything38:32 Consistency Beats Intensity: Falling in Love with the Process40:41 Goal Type #2: Chasing a Feeling in Hard Seasons42:34 Goal Type #3: ‘Future You' Persona + Vision Details44:31 Perfectionism & Analysis Paralysis: Just Choose a Direction46:59 Build Systems That Work: Recipes, Experiments & Habit Stacking53:11 Time Expectations + Environment: The Map, the People, and Momentum59:34 Find Your Community (Free or Paid) + Final Challenge: Do One Thing This Week01:02:40 Wrap-Up: You Don't Need Motivation—You Need a ProcessSign up for Rachel's weekly email: https://msrachelhollis.com/insider/Call the podcast hotline and leave a voicemail! Call (737) 400-4626Watch the podcast on YouTube: http://youtube.com/@MsRachelHollisFollow along on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/MsRachelHollisTo learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

*Disclaimer* This episode contains adult content and is not recommended for young listeners.   Hebrews 12:15 NLT “Look after each other so that none of you fails to receive the grace of God. Watch out that no poisonous root of bitterness grows up to trouble you, corrupting many.”   *Transcription Below*   About Dr. Morgan Cutlip:  It's hard to know where to start so I'll start with what matters most to me and that's my relationships.   I'm a mother to two kids, Effie (12) and Roy (9). They are hilarious, spirited, spicy, deeply thoughtful and emotional kids. I adore them and being their mother. They've challenged me in the most surprising and wonderful ways. I'm married to my high school sweetheart, Chad. I always feel like I lose a little street cred when I say that so, for the record, we didn't date that entire time and eventually reconnected years after college on MySpace (yup, now I've aged myself). He's the love of my life, an incredible man that loves others deeply, works so very hard, and continues to be open to growth and change.   I've worked in the field of relationship education for over 15 years alongside my father, Dr. John Van Epp, who is the founder of Love Thinks and developer of multiple relationship education courses that have been taught to over a million people worldwide. I started traveling to conferences with him when I was in junior high and so, in many ways, it feels like I've grown up in the relationship education field. He's amazing and brilliant and I'm blessed to have learned so much from him over the years we worked together and just cherish our relationship.   I distinctly remember a conversation with my dad over 20 years ago where I said that someday I wanted to support women, but I just wasn't sure how.   Fast forward 10 years and Effie (our oldest) was born and, holy moly, did motherhood hit me like a ton of bricks and I completely lost myself in motherhood (you can read the full story in my book).

I flat out love comedy, laughing and having a great time. Some of my favourite comedians include the brilliant Mae Martin, Tig Nataro and Sarah Millican, but each of these comedians has a different comedy style. Also, I am a massive fan of The Handsome Podcast because it is just brilliant, funny and it always makes me laugh. However, what makes us laugh? What are the social psychology and cognitive psychology processes behind laughter? How does comedy impact our behaviour? In this cognitive psychology podcast episode, we'll answer all those great questions and more. If you enjoy learning about humor psychology, mental processes and how our emotions impact our behaviour, then this will be a brilliant episode for you.In the psychology news section, you'll learn about why virtual dates can be just as good as in-person dates, how our blinks might show we're really listening, and how relationship support is even more important for intercultural relationships.LISTEN NOW!If you want to support the podcast, please check out:FREE AND EXCLUSIVE 8 PSYCHOLOGY BOOK BOXSET- https://www.subscribepage.io/psychologyboxsetPersonality Psychology and Individual Differences- https://www.connorwhiteley.net/personality-psychology-and-individual-differences Available from all major eBook retailers and you can order the paperback and hardback copies from Amazon, your local bookstore and local library, if you request it. Also available as an AI-narrated audiobook from selected audiobook platforms and libraries systems. For example, Kobo, Spotify, Barnes and Noble, Google Play, Overdrive, Baker and Taylor and Bibliotheca. Patreon- patreon.com/ThePsychologyWorldPodcast#humor #comedy #socialpsychology #cognitivepsychology #humorpsychology #humor #comedypsychology #clinicalpsychology #mentalhealth #clinicalmentalhealth #clinicalpsychologist #mentalhealthawareness #mentalhealthsupport #mentalhealthadvocate #psychology #psychology_facts #psychologyfacts #psychologyfact #psychologystudent #psychologystudents #podcast #podcasts #short

In this powerful episode of Cryptid Warfare, Andrew sits down with Dr. Dennis Carroll to break down the truth about angels — what the Bible actually says, what most Christians misunderstand, and why angelology matters now more than ever.   We dive deep into:   • What angelology really is • The hierarchy and different types of angels in Scripture • Seraphim, Cherubim, Archangels, and the “living creatures” • Angels in spiritual warfare • Biblical encounters that shook entire nations • Firsthand modern accounts of angelic intervention   Are angels symbolic? Are they warriors? Do they still show up today?   This episode goes beyond Sunday school theology and into the raw, biblical reality of heavenly beings operating under the authority of God.   If you're serious about understanding the unseen realm — this is Angelology 101.    The battle is real.  Heaven is not passive       Dr. Dennis Carroll is a National and Internationally Known Writer/Author and an Authority on The Occult and Folklore. His career in all Fields of the Paranormal and The Supernatural has spanned over 55+ Years. He is a Spiritual Research and Demonology Consultant and a Cryptid and Ufology Investigative Field Researcher. He is a Retired Law Enforcement Officer, an Ordained Minister, Doctor of Metaphysics, Parapsychologist and A Certified Paranormal Investigator. His Books are on Amazon and Barnes/Noble. Website: denniswcarroll.com Email: denniswcarroll@gmail.com.)   Ways to Support and Connect with Dr. Dennis Carroll (Hunting the Shadows) :  https://youtube.com/@huntingtheshadows denniswcarroll.com denniswcarroll@gmail.com     Help a brother out and buy me a Coffee  (Monthly or one time donation keeps the show going): We know there is room for improvement and have decided to ask you (Our amazing listeners) to help the podcast grow! This will help with better audio, expedition funding, and much more!   https://venmo.com/u/cryptidwarfare     Email me:  Podcast Cryptidwarfare@gmail.com   Critter/Cryptid Control/Consulting  C.WOPPS@protonmail.com C.woperations17905@gmail.com         Help support our mission in giving you the best podcast on ? Anchor.fm/Spotify, iTunes, Podbean +   Make sure to give me a ️️️️️ review :). Thank yall!    Cryptid Warfare: https://www.instagram.com/cryptid_warfare_pod_cast/ youtube: www.youtube.com/@cryptidwarfare     Business Shout Outs:   C.W OPERATIONS & SURVIVAL  Owner & Operator : Drew M Critter Hitters / Monster Hunters for Hire email: c.woperations17905@gmail.com. or  C.WOPPS@protonmail.com    Tier1 Restoration  Brain Cochrans phone = 615-809-9839 https://tier1restoration.godaddysites.com/   Bearded Brothers Trucking  Danny Vega  https://vegabrostn.com/   BerryHill Window Cleaning  https://www.berryhillwindowcleaningtn.com/     The Tac Patch  https://www.instagram.com/thetacpatch_?igsh=MWFidzk3d2tib3Ztdw== https://thetacpatch.com/   FLatTopK9  Owner - Tim Russell  www.FlatTopK9.com   Stead Fast OverLand Owner - Jerrett Hudson https://www.instagram.com/steadfastoverland?utm_source=ig_web_button_share_sheet&igsh=ZDNlZDc0MzIxNw==     kingdom.defense.llc   Part Owner : Mr. Charlie  https://www.instagram.com/kingdom.defense.llc?utm_source=ig_web_button_share_sheet&igsh=ZDNlZDc0MzIxNw==   https://www.instagram.com/anestillc?utm_source=ig_web_button_share_sheet&igsh=ZDNlZDc0MzIxNw==     Amazing outtro ? by my friend D & Andrew (Walking Lightly Tones Studios Music) as well as Paul. Check out CallhimD Spotify and Instagram give him a listen/follow https://open.spotify.com/artist/16BHUS6UGILgxsBEUxqQJ https://www.instagram.com/call.him.d?utm_source=ig_web_button_share_sheet&igsh=ZDNlZDc0MzIxNw==    

The wasteland can be a dangerous place…especially for those who seek rare, limited edition 4K sets. Legend has it that a store manager named Dave once went looking for the Arrow 4K version of the Friday the 13th 2009 reboot once out in Sector 5, near the old abandoned Barnes and Noble. He went out looking for some high bit rates and some nifty special features…what he got was a nasty bump on the head and a night he'd probably like to forget. ‘Cause when someone asks you if you wanna shoot the boot…you better have a strong stomach and a likin' of Pabst Blue Ribbon, by God.I'm your host and store manager of legend, Dave, and joining me as we watch Michael Bay bay-ify another beloved franchise are fellow cinephiles and former Crystal Lake Camp Counselors Mike and Jackie.Topics of discussion in this episode include a breakdown of the eye rolling era of grim, gritty horror reboots; we wonder what kind of couple has sex five feet from their friends if they aren't supposed to be swingers; and finally, Mike reveals the shocking reality that Friday the 13th and Transformers share the same cinematic universe…and it all begins with a douchebag named Trent.Be sure to rate, review and subscribe wherever you get your podcasts. You can also Like Us on Facebook, or shoot us an email at apocalypsevideopod@gmail.com That'll do it for this obligatory Friday the 13th episode. When Jason Voorhees returns to Apocalypse Video we'll finally be getting around to the one that started it all (from a certain point of view) with Friday the 13th: Part 3.

Rise is Back! Get your tickets while they last! - Live Events!!Upgrade to the Ad Free Premium Podcast Experience - https://rachelhollis.supercast.comLast Chance to Dive even Deeper in the Coaching Community (Enrollment Closing Soon) - Rachel Hollis CoachingIn this episode of the 'Ask Rach' Rachel answers questions on feeling directionless, financial struggles, and competitive friendships. Rachel provides practical advice on embracing passion, managing finances, and fostering authentic connections.Get your copy of Rachel's New Book Here: Audible, Amazon, Barnes & Noble, Books-A-Millon, Bookshop.org, or wherever books are sold!00:00 Identifying Toxic Friendships01:04 Welcome to Ask Rach02:01 How the Podcast Works03:45 Angie's Question: Feeling Stuck05:00 Finding Joy and Purpose14:10 Financial Struggles and College Costs27:03 Competitive Female Friendships38:15 Final Thoughts and FarewellSign up for Rachel's weekly email: https://msrachelhollis.com/insider/Call the podcast hotline and leave a voicemail! Call (737) 400-4626Watch the podcast on YouTube: http://youtube.com/@MsRachelHollisFollow along on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/MsRachelHollisTo learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

This week, Kyra sits down with Oona Metz, licensed clinical social worker, author, and group psychotherapist, for a deeply compassionate conversation about divorce, grief, and rebuilding life with intention. With more than 30 years of experience supporting women through major transitions, Oona brings clarity and care to a season that often feels overwhelming and misunderstood. Oona introduces her five-phase model of divorce grief, a framework she developed after realizing traditional grief models did not fully reflect the lived experience of divorce. Together, they explore heartbreak, emotional instability, healing, letting go, and moving forward, while also discussing identity rediscovery, boundary setting, and supporting children through change. This episode centers women who are navigating divorce or its aftermath and offers reassurance that healing is not linear but it is possible. In this episode: ✨ Oona's five-phase model of divorce grief ✨ Why divorce grief deserves its own framework ✨ Reconnecting with identity after marriage ends ✨ Setting boundaries with ex-partners, family, and friends ✨ Supporting children while tending to your own healing ✨ Reducing conflict and creating stability in divorced families For women who feel unmoored, exhausted, or unsure of what comes next, this conversation offers validation, tools, and hope for a grounded path forward. Connect with Oona Metz Learn more about Oona's work supporting women through divorce, healing, and life transitions: Website: https://www.oonametz.com Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/oonametz Book: Unhitched: The Essential Divorce Guide for Women Available on Amazon, Barnes and Noble, and Target Signed Copies Available At: Belmont Books (Belmont, MA): https://belmontbooks.com Brookline Booksmith (Brookline, MA): https://brooklinebooksmith.com Signed copies are available for in-store pickup or online ordering through each bookstore's website. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Welcome to Part 1 of our special bone health mini-series, featuring Dr. Jocelyn Wittstein, Dr. Jessica Shepherd, personal trainer Debra Atkinson, and PhD researcher Dr. Darren Candow. In this episode, we discuss the impact of contraceptive use on bone health, especially in young women, and explore how underfueling and relative energy deficiency can contribute to serious bone health issues early in life. We highlight the strong connection between thyroid health and bone health, and clarify how frequently, how much, and how intensely we should strength train to best support our bones. We examine the potential long-term benefits of vibration plates, address concerns with current osteoporosis screening guidelines, and explain why assessing women's bone health earlier is crucial. Finally, we review the latest research on creatine monohydrate and its promising impact on bone health. I sincerely hope you enjoy Part 1 of this mini-series, which sets the stage for understanding lifelong bone health. IN THIS EPISODE, YOU WILL LEARN: How underfueling, overtraining, and oral contraceptives can limit bone development  The value of strength training and impact-based exercise for preserving bone density, supporting metabolic health, and reducing fracture risk How even a few minutes of impact exercise per day can stimulate bone strength  How vibration plates can complement strength and impact training Why declining estrogen during perimenopause and menopause increases the risk of osteoporosis and fractures as women age The benefits of weight training, resistance exercises, Pilates, and water aerobics for improving bone density and maintaining muscle strength How creatine supplementation combined with resistance training or structured exercise can help preserve bone strength in postmenopausal women How creatine alone, without physical activity, shows no meaningful benefit Connect with Cynthia Thurlow   Follow on X, Instagram & LinkedIn Check out Cynthia's website Submit your questions to support@cynthiathurlow.com Join other like-minded women in a supportive, nurturing community: The Midlife Pause/Cynthia Thurlow  Cynthia's Menopause Gut Book is on presale now! Cynthia's Intermittent Fasting Transformation Book The Midlife Pause Supplement Line Connect with Dr. Jocelyn Wittstein On the Duke Health website On Instagram The Complete Bone and Joint Health Plan, co-authored by Jocelyn Wittstein, MD, and Sydney Nitzkorski, MS, RD, is available on Amazon and at Barnes & Noble, and from most bookstores. Connect with Debra Atkinson On her website The Flipping 50 Podcast On Social Media: @flipping50tv Connect with Dr. Jessica Shepherd Sanctum Med and Wellness On Instagram: Jessica Shepherd or Modern Meno Dr. Shepherd's new book, Generation M, is available in-store or online from Barnes and Noble or on Amazon. Connect with Dr. Darren Candow On Instagram On X University of Regina Featured Episodes Ep. 467 Bone & Joint Health Tips for Women 40+ with Jocelyn Wittstein                              Ep. 321 Muscle, Bone & Joint Health in Menopause with Debra Atkinson                    Ep. 424 Menopause 101: Symptoms, HRT, and a Bio-Individual Approach with Dr. Jessica Shepherd Ep. 301 Creatine: The Best Supplement for Better Bones & Brain Health with Dr. Darren Candow

Rima Jalba shares the good of the Cinnamon Trust, the UK national charity for older people, the terminally ill and their pets. The mission is as simple as it is clear: they provide hands-on assistance to pet owners across the country when any aspect of the day-to-day care of their pets poses a problem; as well as the provision of lifelong care for pets who outlive their owners. A life-long animal lover herself, Rima shares everything from her first pet as a child to how she made a life change, choosing to work for connection rather than just a paycheck. And that's exactly what brought her to the Cinnamon Trust's (doggie) door. For the animal lovers out there (just like us) and for anyone looking for inspiration on how to engage within your own community, this good one is for you. ___________________________ Steve's third book in his cozy mystery series, THE DOG WALKING DETECTIVES is finally here: SEASON'S SLAYINGS! Get your copy on Amazon: https://bit.ly/3WYTPiR or Barnes & Noble: https://bit.ly/4hOjILR Grab the first two: Book 1: DROWN TOWN Amazon: https://amzn.to/478W8mp Barnes & Noble: https://bit.ly/3Mv7cCk & Book 2: MURDER UNMASKED Amazon: https://shorturl.at/fDR47 Barnes & Noble: https://shorturl.at/3ccTy

On this episode, we discuss osteoarthritis and describe its clinical presentations, etiologies, and underlying pathophysiology.  We review current guidelines and evidence-based treatment strategies for managing osteoarthritis, including pharmacological and nonpharmacological interventions. We also compare and contrast the efficacy, safety profiles, and appropriate use of pharmacologic therapies, physical modalities, and lifestyle interventions in the treatment of osteoarthritis.  Cole and I are happy to share that our listeners can claim ACPE-accredited continuing education for listening to this podcast episode! We have continued to partner with freeCE.com to provide listeners with the opportunity to claim 1-hour of continuing education credit for select episodes. For existing Unlimited (Gold) freeCE members, this CE option is included in your membership benefits at no additional cost! A password, which will be given at some point during this episode, is required to access the post-activity test. To earn credit for this episode, visit the following link below to go to freeCE's website: https://www.freece.com/ If you're not currently a freeCE member, we definitely suggest you explore all the benefits of their Unlimited Membership on their website and earn CE for listening to this podcast. Thanks for listening! If you want to support the podcast, check out our Patreon account. Subscribers will have access to all previous and new pharmacotherapy lectures as well as downloadable PowerPoint slides for each lecture. If you purchase an annual membership, you'll also get a free digital copy of High-Powered Medicine 3rd edition by Dr. Alex Poppen, PharmD. HPM is a book/website database of summaries for over 150 landmark clinical trials.You can visit our Patreon page at the website below:  www.patreon.com/corconsultrx We want to give a big thanks to Dr. Alex Poppen, PharmD and High-Powered Medicine for sponsoring the podcast..  You can get a copy of HPM at the links below:  Purchase a subscription or PDF copy - https://highpoweredmedicine.com/ Purchase the paperback and hardcover - Barnes and Noble website We want to say thank you to our sponsor, Pyrls. Try out their drug information app today. Visit the website below for a free trial: www.pyrls.com/corconsultrx We also want to thank our sponsor Freed AI. Freed is an AI scribe that listens, prepares your SOAP notes, and writes patient instructions. Charting is done before your patient walks out of the room. You can try 10 notes for free and after that it only costs $99/month. Visit the website below for more information: https://www.getfreed.ai/  If you have any questions for Cole or me, reach out to us via e-mail: Mike - mcorvino@corconsultrx.com Cole - cswanson@corconsultrx.com

Welcome to Episode 247! Can you believe it is already time to share our annual Holiday Gift Ideas?? Each year, starting with Episode 2 back in 2016, we share some bookish (or biblioadventuring) gifts. We hope you benefit from these in the form of presents for loved ones and/or for yourself! We also discuss our fourth quarter readalong pick – the last in our year of reading ghost stories – HOW TO SELL A HAUNTED HOUSE by Grady Hendrix. Thanks to everyone who read along and those who attended the Zoom conversation. Cacawewe! In our Just Read segment, we talk about: THE BONE THIEF by Vanessa Lillie WITCHES OF DUBIOUS ORIGIN by Jenn McKinlay ANNE BRONTË NIGHT WALKER: A Brontë Blood Chronicle by Gea Haff Chris also DNF'd two novels. It happens. In Biblio Adventures, Emily went to Bank Square Books in Mystic to hear Luanne Rice in conversation with Vanessa Lillie about her novel THE BONE THIEF. Chris had a good old browse at Barnes & Noble in Milford, CT, where she stumbled upon one of our gift ideas. Thank you to this episode's sponsor RESONANT BLUE AND OTHER STORIES by Mary Vensel White. Happy Listening and, until next time, we wish you lots of Happy Reading! https://www.bookcougars.com/blog-1/2025/episode247

PART I: In 1956, a sinister figure known as the 'Mad Bomber' has been terrorizing New York City for 16 long years, leaving a trail of destruction in his wake. His bombs have detonated in telephone booths, restrooms, Grand Central Terminal, and other iconic landmarks across the Big Apple. While many have suffered injuries, fortunately, no one has died—yet. In a desperate attempt to reveal the identity of this elusive criminal, the NYPD bomb squad is utilizing a forensic crime lab, the first of its kind used for crime-fighting. As chilling letters from the 'Mad Bomber' continue to pour in, newspapers compete to cover the most compelling stories, amplifying the public's rising fear and anxiety. The question lingers: where will he strike next? And who is the enigmatic 'F.P.'?   Buy Michael Cannell's INCENDIARY; The Psychiatrist, the Mad Bomber, & the Invention of Criminal Profiling on AMAZON.  Buy on BARNES AND NOBLE. PLANNING TO GO TO CRIMECON LAS VEGAS MAY 2026?  Jill will be on ON CREATORS ROW!  Use Jill's code   murdershelf    and save 10% on your badge! Happy to help! Join Jill on PATREON for $2- $4 and help pick our next book and enjoy Jill's SERIAL KILLER Case Studies! Crimecon 2026 is COMING!  Get your Murder Shelf Book Club merch! https://www.jusaskjan.com/murder-shelf-book-club Sources, photographs, and information can be found on Jill's blog: January  2026 Contact:  jill@murdershelfbookclub.com, or X,  Facebook,  Instagram or YouTube.

Goldylocks Productions presents In the Psychic Flow with Carolan CareyCarolan Carey has been called "The Psychic Medium of Sarasota" or "SRQ" to all you jet-setters! After doing phone readings from New York to Vietnam - Carolan's clients refer to her as "that psychic from Sarasota". Carolan is a platform medium demonstrating her spirit connection at many area venues. Enjoy candid conversation about mediumship, the psychic arts and your well-being. http://www.carolancarey.com Her Facebook Page: The Psychic Medium of SRQ/Sarasota: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100057252947674Carolan's Venmo: https://account.venmo.com/u/carolan-careySpecial Guest: Kelly Jo Monaghan aka Kelly Jo PsychicAs young as early teens, Kelly Jo had embarked on her psychic journey. She worked with another psychic on a long-distance murder case in Mass. and on an extremely sensitive and high profile murder case in Florida.As a gifted clairvoyant, medium, pet psychic and medical intuitive, Kelly Jo has traveled around the United States doing readings, tea parties, Glasonbury fairs, private consultations, pet hands on healing, lectures at Mesa Arizona University to include: From the 80's – 90's, spiritual book reviews at Barnes and Noble in Florida. She is also a Medical Intuitive – uses this gift for readings in sensitive health matters; Assisting healing, body scans – Pranic healing and Releasing deceased or trapped spirits back into the light of God Source.http://kellyjopsychic.comGoldylocks Productions: http://www.goldylocksproductions.com Receive links and updates for our Shows, Special Events and Sales! Subscribe to The Goldylocks Zone Blog: https://www.whitesagewoman.me Join us on Telegram: https://t.me/+YSquH-U8Vib501QU Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Rise is Back! Get your tickets - Live Events!!Upgrade to the Premium Podcast Experience - https://rachelhollis.supercast.comDive even Deeper in the Coaching Community - Rachel Hollis CoachingJoin Rachel for a Free Live Virtual Masterclass!! - February 10 @ 12 pm EST - Why Motivation Wears Off & What Actually Works!In this episode of The Rachel Hollis Podcast, Rachel Hollis offers a wealth of practical advice for small business owners on how to increase profitability and scale their ventures. Addressing common challenges such as overworking without increasing profits, and the importance of focusing on profit rather than just revenue, Rachel dives deep into key business concepts.Get your copy of Rachel's New Book Here: Audible, Amazon, Barnes & Noble, Books-A-Millon, Bookshop.org, or wherever books are sold!00:00 Introduction to Profit Strategies01:05 Meet Rachel Hollis01:35 Common Struggles of Business Owners05:28 The Importance of Profit Over Revenue06:57 Understanding Gross and Net Revenue14:45 Real-Life Business Examples20:32 Maximizing Customer Transactions29:54 Maximizing Customer Spend32:00 The Importance of Upselling33:52 Leadership and Mindset39:20 Direct Access to Customers46:51 Financial Clarity for Business GrowthSign up for Rachel's weekly email: https://msrachelhollis.com/insider/Call the podcast hotline and leave a voicemail! Call (737) 400-4626Watch the podcast on YouTube: http://youtube.com/@MsRachelHollisFollow along on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/MsRachelHollisTo learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Special Patreon Release: Emotionally Healthy Familial Relationships with Cherilyn Orr   "bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord." Ephesians 6:4b (KJV)   *Transcription Below*   Cherilyn Orr is passionate about helping parents, teachers, and guardians raise emotionally healthy and resilient children. She has worked with families and educators in North America, Europe, and Africa to help them build safe schools, homes, and communities where children can flourish. The Stoplight Approach that she developed was born out of her experiences as an educator, a foster mom, and a mom to seven through birth and adoption, and it combines biblical truths with the latest brain science. Connect with her on her Website, Facebook, Instagram, or YouTube.   Topics and Questions We Cover: What are a few helpful tips for us to understand brain science 101? How can we repair the relationship when we don't disciple and discipline from our Green zone? Within the stoplight approach, can you provide some examples of how we can calm a red-rooted misbehavior?   Thank You to Our Sponsors: Chick-fil-A East Peoria and The Savvy Sauce Charities (and donate online here)   Connect with The Savvy Sauce on Facebook or Instagram or Our Website   Gospel Scripture: (all NIV) Romans 3:23 “for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God,”   Romans 3:24 “and are justified freely by his grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus.”   Romans 3:25 (a) “God presented him as a sacrifice of atonement, through faith in his blood.”   Hebrews 9:22 (b) “without the shedding of blood there is no forgiveness.”   Romans 5:8 “But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.”   Romans 5:11 “Not only is this so, but we also rejoice in God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have now received reconciliation.”   John 3:16 “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.”   Romans 10:9 “That if you confess with your mouth, “Jesus is Lord,” and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved.”   Luke 15:10 says “In the same way, I tell you, there is rejoicing in the presence of the angels of God over one sinner who repents.”   Romans 8:1 “Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus”   Ephesians 1:13–14 “And you also were included in Christ when you heard the word of truth, the gospel of your salvation. Having believed, you were marked in him with a seal, the promised Holy Spirit, who is a deposit guaranteeing our inheritance until the redemption of those who are God's possession- to the praise of his glory.”   Ephesians 1:15–23 “For this reason, ever since I heard about your faith in the Lord Jesus and your love for all the saints, I have not stopped giving thanks for you, remembering you in my prayers. I keep asking that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the glorious Father, may give you the spirit of wisdom and revelation, so that you may know him better. I pray also that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you, the riches of his glorious inheritance in the saints, and his incomparably great power for us who believe. That power is like the working of his mighty strength, which he exerted in Christ when he raised him from the dead and seated him at his right hand in the heavenly realms, far above all rule and authority, power and dominion, and every title that can be given, not only in the present age but also in the one to come. And God placed all things under his feet and appointed him to be head over everything for the church, which is his body, the fullness of him who fills everything in every way.”   Ephesians 2:8–10 “For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith – and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God – not by works, so that no one can boast. For we are God‘s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.“   Ephesians 2:13 “But now in Christ Jesus you who once were far away have been brought near through the blood of Christ.“   Philippians 1:6 “being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.”   *Transcription*   Music: (0:00 – 0:09)   Laura Dugger: (0:09 - 2:07) Welcome to The Savvy Sauce, where we have practical chats for intentional living. I'm your host, Laura Dugger, and I'm so glad you're here.   I want to say a huge thank you to today's sponsors for this episode, Chick-fil-A East Peoria and Savvy Sauce Charities.   Are you interested in a free college education for you or someone you know? Stay tuned for details coming later in this episode from today's sponsor, Chick-fil-A East Peoria. You can also visit their website today at Chick-fil-A.com/EastPeoria.   If you've been with us long, you know this podcast is only one piece of our nonprofit, which is the Savvy Sauce Charities. Don't miss out on our other resources. We have questions and content to inspire you to have your own practical chats for intentional living.   And I also hope you don't miss out on the opportunity to financially support us through your tax-deductible donations. All this information can be found on our recently updated website, TheSavvySauce.com.   Cherilyn Orr is my guest today. She is kind and humble and a woman who's passionate about helping parents, teachers, and guardians raise emotionally healthy and resilient children. She's going to share how she combines biblical truths with the latest brain science to build healthy relationships in the family. Here's our chat. Welcome to The Savvy Sauce, Cherilyn.   Cherilyn Orr: (2:07 - 2:08) Thank you. I'm really happy to join you today.   Laura Dugger: (2:08 - 2:10) And will you start by just giving us a snapshot of your life right now?   Cherilyn Orr: (2:08 - 3:11) Yes, I am actually talking to you from Athens, Greece. That is where our family resides right now. And we've been here for the last few years. And before that, we lived in Uganda and Africa.   I have seven children and my oldest is now a mom herself. And she just gave birth a couple months ago to a preemie little baby. And I am so excited because now I have entered the world of grandparenthood.   But I'm also in the throes of life with a 12-year-old, a 14-year-old, and a 17-year-old. And I have a university student living at home. My next son is 21, and he's also living at home, going to university. So those are my four at home.   I have one in Canada, working there. And I have two that are married. One that lives in Africa with his wife, and they're working there. And another one with my grandbaby that's living here in Greece, working with the church here.   Laura Dugger: (3:12 - 3:19) That is quite a full family and a global family. What has taken you to the different parts of the world?   Cherilyn Orr: (3:20 - 3:44) Well, we are a missional family. But we believe that everybody's called to be a missional and to serve God. And God happens to have taken us to different places.   I've been working with The Stoplight Approach now for a few years now. My husband does leadership training as well. So that's kind of what's taken us around the world. Now that we're in Greece, I'm also involved with refugees as well here.   Laura Dugger: (3:45 - 4:06) Well, we are fortunate to live in a time with access to scientific knowledge about the brain. And it all points back to our brilliant Creator, God. But you make this brain science so simple to comprehend. So, can you just share a few helpful tips for us so that we can understand kind of brain science 101?   Cherilyn Orr: (4:08 - 6:40) Yes, I think for me, it's been a journey. But it came when after we adopted a child and she was having an all-out meltdown. And it would have taken me an hour or so to regroup her.   And it was just amazing. I was with a friend and she is a behavioral consultant. And she said, “Let me.” And this was after we had had her for at least a couple of years at this point. And she just said, “Let me.”   And she got down on the ground where my child was screaming hysterically. And she was able to get her back sitting on her seat, doing what she was supposed to in less than, I don't know, 10 minutes.   And I was shocked because here I am an educator. I have a master's degree. I'm a special needs teacher. I have been working for years with children in different settings around the world. And here I was looking at her doing something that I just didn't know how to do.   It was a huge paradigm shift for me when she said afterwards, I said, “What did you do?”   And she said, “It's by understanding the brain. The brain is like three parts. It's like a stoplight.”   So, she said, if you can think of it that way, as there's that bottom part of your brain, which is that fight, flight, freeze. When you are just only using 50% of your capacity and you just can't hear anybody's perspective.   And then there's that middle part of your brain, which is the limbic system. And she said, you know, that's when you're using 75% or so of your brain capacity. And that's when you're stressed, you're worried, you're anxious, and you're just not at your best.   And then there's your top part of your brain, which is your neocortex, which you are just ready to learn. And you can problem solve and you can think and you are the best version of yourself at that moment.   And she talked to me a little bit about that. And she's just said, this is what's happening in your brain. For me, that was a wow, you know, because it's like understanding the brain is so opposite than anything that I had ever done. And as an educator, I've been trained to control children. I've taken courses on behavior management. And this was just like changing the equation. When you understand the brain, then it changes how you can relate to the child in your care.   Laura Dugger: (6:41 - 7:05) And also, I will just sprinkle in a few little things that I found fascinating in your book. One of your conclusions was that relationships are the biggest factor in brain development and for it to develop in a healthy way. So, is that what you found true throughout the years of our life, that relationships are vital?   Cherilyn Orr: (7:05 - 8:02) It's for everybody. And it needs to start with that relationship. And that relationship has what I would say three pillars, which is safety, which is your red brain. In order to come out of that fight, flight or freeze, you have to feel safe.   And in order to come out of yellow brain, which is your limbic system, you need to feel connected and you need to feel respected. And respect means to be seen, heard and valued. And when you're in that yellow brain state, you don't feel connected. You feel disconnected.   So, in order to get people to green brain, you need to make them feel seen, heard and valued. So, if we want healthy relationships and we want green home, then we need to be able to help our children get to that green brain state. But it starts by making them feel safe and making them feel connected. So, relationship is foundational.   Laura Dugger: (8:02 - 8:24) And you've combined your knowledge of the Bible and all of this brain science to write a book entitled Signals: How Brain Science and the Bible Help Parents Raise Resilient Children. So, will you elaborate now on that Stoplight Approach that you teach and write about?   Cherilyn Orr: (8:27 - 11:10) Well, yes, I am so excited because we just looked at, you know, those three elements, safety, respect and being connected, and then we could teach it. And when we look at the Bible and we say, “How does God view me and how does He work with me?”   I go back to the fact is when God sees me in my mess ups and He sees my anger or my gossip or my addictions or whatever I'm struggling with. He looks at me and He says, “Come to me. I am your safety. I am your refuge.”   He wants us to bring Him our messes. He says, “Come to me just as you are, not as you want to be, not as you should be and not as you could be.” And in that context, He says, “I delight in you. I know you. I know every hair on your head. I know you. I know your name and I love you. You are in the palm of my hand and I delight in you.”   And Zephaniah talks about and He sings over us, not because we've done something, not because we're worthy, because He knows that unless we feel safe and unless we are in that connection and can relationship with them, then He cannot help us to train us and to walk with us and guide us through the process of growing and becoming that healthy person that He desires for us to be.   So, I was so excited when I looked at who God is and how it matches with what brain science is teaching us about red, yellow, green and how we can't teach anybody. It takes 12 to 15 times to teach a child a new skill when they are in green. That same child, that same skill when he's there in red will take 350 to 400 times because that is not the part of the brain where you can do problem solving or critical thinking or even to have empathy for anybody else. That part of the brain can only do rote learning. So, it will take you so long to teach a child when they're in that part of the brain.   And I love it because that obedience is an outflowing of a relationship with us, with God. And when we look at our child, that's what we want is we don't want them to obey us because they fear us, but we want them to obey us because they are connected to us. Just like God wants us to obey Him in that relationship, not because it's the rule and that's what we need to do.   So, I'm so excited to see how that brain science is catching up to who God is.   Laura Dugger: (11:11 - 12:07) Oh, my goodness. That is amazing to also just think of the Lord as obviously our parent and we want to model after Him. Some of this is reminding me there was a previous episode with Dr. Josh and Christy Straub where they were looking at research findings about parenting. And one of them was that it was so important for us to be self-regulated when we're responding to our children. And there's a connection.   So, in your book, I'm just going to read this one quote from page 56. You wrote, “One of the most shocking things I realized as I learned about brain science was that it is impossible to make a child feel loved when the parent is in yellow or red. They feel our stress. They feel our disapproval.” And so, would you like to elaborate on that as well?   Cherilyn Orr: (12:09 - 13:41) Well, we have this thing that we talk a lot about in The Stoplight Approach. We talk about the stoplight starts with me. You cannot give what you don't have.   So many parents will say, “I love my child,” but the child does not feel loved. And when I was doing seminars and training throughout North America, you know, often people say, “We are a yellow society.” And that broke my heart.   We are a yellow society. We're running our kids at five in the morning to this program, to hockey or this or programs late at night. And we're just running.   And I feel like if we are yellow and we are stressed, then there is automatically a disconnect. There's almost like a gate that says, do not enter. You can't go through it unless you are in green.   You're in red, then your whole house turns to red. Mama's in red, everybody's in red. Or if you're in yellow, you'll start to see the children in your care are in yellow.   And I find that in my house. When I start to see my house going to that yellow space, I start to have to do like, what color am I in? If I'm in yellow, then they're going to be in yellow. And you start to see them fighting amongst themselves or bickering or just not cooperating. And there's that tension that comes because they're picking up my yellowness and my stress.   Laura Dugger: (13:42 - 14:04) And so, let's go a little bit further with that scenario. If parents are in a very stressful season and there are quite a few to-do's that have to get done on top of the daily things. If that parent identifies they are in the yellow, maybe in the red, how can they get back to green even in the midst of a crazy time of life?   Cherilyn Orr: (14:06 - 16:26) Well, you know, you don't have to be perfect. You don't have to be a perfect parent. But what science is showing us and it's what God wants from us is that sense of repair. We need to look at how do we repair because that's what our child needs because life is not perfect and we are not perfect. And I am certainly far from being a perfect parent. But how do I repair the damage and how do I connect?   So, we call it fix it, treasure it and change it. So, fix it is: Yes, I am sorry. Mommy yelled at you. I am so sorry I did that. I was in yellow and I was really stressed. Would you forgive me? I love you and you did not deserve me to yell at you. I care about you and I did not handle that appropriately.   And I want you to help me. This is what I've said to my children. I want you to help me when I'm going to red or I'm going to yellow. Just remind me and say, “Mom, you're going to yellow.” And then that can help me to make some changes right then and create that gap so that I'm not reacting. Or maybe I could take a walk or maybe I could get myself back to green.   When I react in that yellow or red brain state, it's not safe for you. It's not safe for others. So, let's work together on this.   And then we can talk about maybe what was happening in our house at that time as well. And maybe how they can help things to go smoother in our house. So that they could take some responsibility in helping because Mommy didn't feel seen, heard and valued. You know, I had asked you five times to do that. So how do we work together to make this house run smoother?   So being red and yellow are not bad things. It's not like you are horrible because you went to red and yellow. It's warning. It's like an alarm going off to say, be careful, be careful.   It's an opportunity to reflect and say, what's not working here? What's the deeper issue here? Yes, maybe I was overtired and maybe I did this. But what else is going on? And I may need to look back on things that maybe are triggering me that are deeper. And maybe things that relate back to my own childhood or how I was raised.   Laura Dugger: (16:26 - 16:52) That makes a lot of sense, that reflection. Because I studied psychology and marriage and family therapy. And we were always taught, name it to tame it. And sometimes that really does help when we can pinpoint and identify and name. What is that trigger? It helps to tame it. And I think the biblical concept is when you share it with somebody else, when you bring it into the light, it does lose a lot of its power.   Cherilyn Orr: (16:53 - 17:46) Definitely. Because if I can say I'm in red, it helps me know what I need to do to get myself back to green. So, if I can start to recognize when my body is starting to get tense, when I'm starting to get stressed, I can say, oh, this is my warning. I need to do this. I need to have a shower. I need to go for a walk. I need to regroup myself so that I'm not reacting to my children in my red brain state. I can get myself back to green first. So, I can create that gap.   So, naming it, that's what I think the success of Stoplight is. It's the common language that says how do we help each other when we are moving to yellow and we are moving to red so that everybody in the family knows that red is not bad, but how do we help that person in their red to get back to green?   Laura Dugger: (17:48 - 17:52) What is the Stoplight Approach to discipline and boundaries?   Cherilyn Orr: (17:54 - 22:32) Well, sometimes people think, oh, is The Stoplight Approach permissive? You know, we just let kids do what they want and let them be in green. If anybody has multiple children, you know that if one child is being self-centered and they're in their own world, it's going to create chaos for the rest of the family.   And so, Stoplight is not about permissiveness. And I think we need to be looking at the word discipline comes from the word disciple, which means to train. If you can kind of get that word discipline, because so often we've mixed that word discipline with punishment. So, it's all about punishing a child, whereas actually discipline is not about punishing. It's about training a child.   And everybody, every child needs boundaries. Boundaries help to keep us safe. They help to keep our family safe. It helps to keep that relationships in a healthy way.   So, we often use that word to look at how do we as parents, we've always got boundaries. Don't run in the road. We want to keep you safe. Don't touch the hot stove because you'll burn yourself. So, we look for ways to keep our child safe, and we look for ways to help them be safe in relationships. Yes, you want that ball, but you don't hit the other child to get the ball. So, what could we do differently?   Proverbs 13:24 is a common phrase that I grew up hearing. It was kind of like the parenting theology of my generation. “Whoever spares the rod hates his son, but who loves him diligently disciplines him.”   So that was a verse that I heard a lot in my life. But then as I was studying and looking at brain science and really studying about who is God. And I had to look at what is my image of God? Is He this harsh judge up there that maybe subconsciously I believed? Or is He that loving father like the prodigal son that's waiting for his son? Not to punish him, but to love him and to connect with him. And it says in the New Testament, Jesus says, if you've seen him, you've seen the Father. So, He's a good, good father.   So, then I started to dissect this. What is the rod used for? And it talks about the rod being a comfort and a rod being a sense of protection. And we often hear it used in relationships to sheep. You know, if we're going to keep sheep safe, then we need the rod. That shepherd used a rod to protect his sheep from wild animals. So, as we look at that word rod, it's a protection tool.   So, we take apart that and then hates his son. I think, wow, a parent that does not protect their child or teaches their child to be aware of the dangers in this world. So, as a young child, you're protecting them and teaching them to make safe choices. And then as they get older, you still have to continually, continually teach them that. And so, when I look at that word rod and hates his son, that would be a neglectful. In my words, a parent who is neglectful to teach.   The second verse talks about diligently. And that reminds me in Deuteronomy, when we're told to teach our children all through the day, when we're walking, when we're sitting, when we're at mealtimes. We should be using our days to continually teach our children and to discipline them, which would be to train them in the way that they should go.   And I look at God as our creator of our brain. And He loves us so very, very much. And He wants the very best for us. And we know that children and human beings do better when they feel better. So how do we connect with our child? How do we protect our children? And how do we take that opportunity to be present with our child?   Those are hard things for a lot of parents these days to be present, to be engaged with them and to look for ways to continually be working with them and protecting them and keeping them safe.   Laura Dugger: (22:33 - 22:58) Wow. And I just want to share one of my favorite takeaways from page 143, where you write “Green rooted misbehavior needs coaching. Yellow roots need connection. And red roots need calming.” So, can you provide some examples with that last one of how we can calm a red rooted misbehavior?   Cherilyn Orr: (23:00 - 27:00) Yes, I certainly can. So, all three of these are so important because we often miss it. I'm going to say that red root, it needs us to speak the red language, speak red brain. And to speak red brain means to stop talking about the problem.   That child does not have capacity to hear you when they are in a red brain state. They need me to be calm. They need me to be in green. And they need me to stop talking. And maybe to only use words that feel safe. You're safe. I'm here. You're safe. I'm here. There's no point in talking to anybody in red brain because they have no capacity to hear.   And then also to be able to go for a walk with your child. Repetitive patterning activities are really helpful. Like for my children, each of my children have, they have a green plan. It's like, what do I do when I'm starting to go to red?   So maybe for one of my children, we have a hammock outside. So, she goes there. These are planned ahead of time when they are in green. These are discussed ahead of time. So, another child will, you know, might listen to music, have a shower, go for a walk. Every single one of us, whether it be an adult or child, should look at what do I need to do to get back to green.   As a parent, when we're looking at green rooted misbehaviors, red rooted misbehaviors and yellow roots misbehaviors, you could have the same issue like two kids fighting. You come around the corner and there you see your two siblings fighting. As a parent, often we go to red immediately. Our brain state goes because it feels threatening. It feels fearful to us. And then we react.   So, I have to take a deep breath myself and I have to say, OK, what brain state is this child in? And sometimes we don't know. So, we can call the children and say, what's going on? Just stopping and asking the question will give us the opportunity to hear what brain state our child is in.   If they happily look it up and say, we were playing Pirates of the Caribbean or something that they had seen on a TV show, then you can say, OK, well, what you're doing is unsafe and somebody is going to get hurt. But they're just acting.   And then if it's a yellow brain state, it's like he pushed me, he touched me. And they're just kind of bickering at each other. They're not really all out fighting. But, you know, you can look at them and say, let's stop and let's make each other feel seen, heard and valued. So, you can work with that child because that child at that point is in yellow brain. And then we can speak yellow brain, which is people don't feel that they're being heard. They don't feel respected. And that's when you can talk about what other things that they could do instead.   And then, of course, we have red brain when these children are all out to hurt each other. They are mad. So that's when we can go into that red brain and say, OK, both of you need to get back to green. We're not going to talk about this right now. I want you to use your green plan and get yourselves back to green. And then we will talk.   Some children can do that independently and some children need you to do it with them. And sometimes it might be that you just take those two children out and say, we're going to run around the block together.” And it's how do you connect with your child at that particular time and keep them safe and get them moving and get their brain state back up to green before you talk with them.   Laura Dugger: (27:01 - 32:37) And now a brief message from our sponsor. Did you know you can go to college tuition free just by being a team member at Chick-fil-A East Peoria? 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Another way to find it is simply type in donate to the search bar on our website and just click the first picture shown.   We are all about sharing around here, sharing resources, sharing joy, and sharing the good news about Jesus Christ. We ask that you also will share by sharing financially, sharing the Savvy Sauce podcast episodes, and sharing a five-star rating and review. You can also share any of our social media posts on Instagram or Facebook. We are grateful for all of it, and we just love partnering together with you.   Now, back to the show. And then on our side, I love how you also bring in the repair piece. So how can we practically repair the relationship when we don't disciple and discipline from our green zone as the parent?   Cherilyn Orr: (32:38 - 34:39) Yes, I feel like that is, it's really hard to ask your child to do anything that you're not doing because they're not going to actually be able to take that to heart. And if you say to a child, “I want you to say sorry to your sibling,” they're just going to look and go, “Sorry,” and have no meaning whatsoever.   And that's why we've done a lot of apology notes in my home over the years, because it's an opportunity to really sit down and reflect and talk. And we talk about how the card needs to be beautiful because we need to treasure that person. And so, they need to apologize for what they did. They need to talk about why on earth are they even writing this apology note? Why is that person of value? Because they're our sister or they're our brother or they're our friend or they're the teacher or the coach. And they are a part of our community and our family. So, we need to write that apology note to value that person.   And then we talk about what are we going to do next time. So those three points go into every single apology note my kids write: fix it, treasure it, change it. But you cannot do that when the child is in red. You cannot do it when they're in yellow. You need to have them back to green and then we can talk through it. And then they can go and deliver that to that person and then talk about how they can reconcile the situation. But I find that that's a really good reflective piece that I've used over the years.   But as a parent, it's hard to say sorry to your kid. It's easier to jump in and just treasure the child. You know, let's go to the park. Let's do this and just value the child. But then you end up having an insecure relationship because you've never acknowledged the problem. Therefore, you cannot change it. So therefore, you cannot have a healthy reconciliation.   Laura Dugger: (34:40 - 34:57) And how have you seen this Stoplight Approach work across the world? So many different settings with different countries and cultures or families who foster and adapt or even ones raising children with special needs?   Cherilyn Orr: (34:59 - 36:53) Well, the great thing about science is it doesn't change based on where you are in the world and what culture you're in. Every human has a brain, and all human brains function the same way. And all human brains need safety, connection and coaching.   So that's been the exciting part about understanding brain science. So, you know, even when I work in Africa, I'll say to people when I get malaria, do they give me a different medication because I'm from Canada or do they give me the same as you? And everybody says, of course, malaria is malaria. You know, it's because of science.   And I love that whole element of science that our brains are made the same. It doesn't matter what culture you're in and it doesn't matter what special needs you have. If I see a child and they're under the table and they're holding their ears, I might not know that child at all. But I know that that child is in red brain. I don't have to know if they're special needs. I don't have to know anything else. I can immediately diagnose what brain state that child is in. And then I can work at creating safety for that child. And connecting with that child. And then we can find out how do we move that child and work with that child, whatever their needs are.   And I have four adopted children, and I have fostered many children. In the process of doing that, I have recognized that every child needs to feel safe, connected, and then we can train them. So, it's like changing the equation for how we work with the children. But it works for all people. So, I don't have to have a different philosophy of parenting for my adopted child or my foster child or my biological children. Does that make sense?   Laura Dugger: (36:53 - 37:03) Yes, absolutely. And to personalize it, how has The Stoplight Approach then worked in your life and with you and your husband raising your own children?   Cherilyn Orr: (37:05 - 41:32) I just love the fact that it's a common language. So, I can give you an example of one day there was company coming and I was really stressed. And it seemed like everywhere I looked; every room was a disaster. You know, I had teenagers who were cooking and making themselves food and it was a mess. I had children that had used the bathroom and made a mess all through the bathroom. And then I had toys everywhere and sheets being made into forts. And I had company showing up.   And so, I was going into to Red Brain and I started going, “Who did this? What did you do? Who left this here? Who made this mess?” And one of my kids went and says, “Dad, mom's going to Red.” And that wasn't a judgment. That was like, this is a fact. We need your help here.   And so, dad comes along and he says, he puts his hand on my shoulder and he says, “You're going to Red.” He says, “Why don't you go for a walk? I'll do zone cleanup with the kids because I'm in green. And you can come back in 20 minutes and then you can do all the final tidy up before the kids come. And then that we could greet the company and green.”   So, it just becomes that common language of understanding. And he knew my need at that time. I was feeling unsafe because the house was a disaster. And my brain just was it's a brain issue, right? It's not a behavior issue. But then it was like, how do we support mom in this moment? And then I came back 20 minutes later and did the final little cleanups, and we were able to greet the company in green.   So, there's an example of using the common language as a way to help others in our family know what brain state you're in to support one another. And to be able to identify and connect.   I mean, I could give you tons of examples, even from the smallest child. They start to understand. “He made me go to red” or “I'm in red now.” So, then it's like, OK, so what do we need to do? How do we do this?   I mean, there's been days when all of a sudden I hear everybody kind of not doing too great. And I get them all to sit at the table. And I said, “So what color is our home right now?” And somebody say red. Somebody else says yellow. Then you're saying, “OK, but what kind of home do we want to have?” And they'll say green. So, what do we need to do to get it to green?   So, I think there's there's many, many different ways. But I think it's that common language that even the small child that's two and three can start to learn when they're in red or we can start to use it to teach empathy. When you did that to your sibling, what color did we make him? He didn't feel seen, heard and valued.   Just a few weeks ago, my daughter. Here's here's a recent example. We've had a refugee staying with us for a couple of years, a little girl, and she was about three. All of a sudden there was this blood curdling screaming, you know, just screaming. And I come around the corner going, “What's going on?” And my 12-year-old, very responsible, is holding scissors. She's running with scissors.   And so, my 12-year-old here was a chance to talk. And I said, “OK, so when you took her scissors away, she did not feel seen, heard and valued. Because when you took them away from her, you didn't actually speak to her. So, you need to get down on your knees, and you need to look at her and say, what did you want the scissors for? And we need to teach her. Where do we have scissors? How do we use them?”   So, she was being responsible to keep her safe. But she didn't make her feel seen, heard and valued and listen to her and say, “Oh, you want to cut your hair. Oh, only mommy cuts hair. You can't cut your hair, but we could use our scissors at the table.” So, using red, yellow and green helps to give incredible opportunities to teach empathy and to look at themselves, self-awareness and how to grow and take responsibility.   Laura Dugger: (41:34 - 42:06) And I love how you talk about this common language in such a proactive way with our children, with our families. So that when we are in red, we've got a path and a plan to get back to green. And we've got some tips for repair.   So, when we go to the proactive side and kind of tie this back into the beginning, when we talked about relationships are the foundation for brain health and development. What are some ways to securely attach with our children during different ages and stages?   Cherilyn Orr: (42:08 - 45:54) I think it comes back to being intentional. I often think of it as the 5-10-5 rule. Five minutes in the morning, five minutes in the evening and five minutes before they go to bed at night. It's that opportunity to stop what you're doing and to just focus in intentionally connecting with my child.   It's not easy. It's not easy. But it's how do I connect first thing in the morning when that child has been disconnected from me all night long? How do I connect with them first thing in the morning before they start their day? And then how do I connect with them like after school, before dinner? And how do I hear about what they want to tell me about their day? What part was red? What part was yellow? What kind of day they had?   One of my kids goes, “It was lime green.” And I'm like, “Okay, so how did that happen?”   “Well, I was in green and then I lost my backpack. So, I went to yellow, but then the teacher helped me find it. So, then I went back to green.” So that's how she described her day.   And then you have that connecting before they go to bed at night. That's just like, I see you, I know you, I hear you.   And so that can look differently according to different ages and stages of life. But I think holding that 5-10-5 is a good principle. And there are so many of my children that that 5-10-5 happens in hours and hours. Because they are children that demand my attention. And they are there and they are wanting that continual attention. So, some kids it happens more naturally too.   And then there are some children, and especially as they start getting older, it's a lot more challenging to be able to find that 5-10-5. And that doesn't mean in the busyness of the dinner table or in chore times. But it's about trying to connect with them and say, “I hear you. Tell me about your life. And where are you at?” Or just really just having fun with them. And just connecting to them and laughing with them and playing a game with them as well. Or going for a walk. We do a lot of that.   And with teenagers, and especially boys, it was all about the food. I would show up in their room with a milkshake or something else. Or call them out of their rooms to connect with them at different times. So, you have to be creative. It's not about my schedule sometimes. It's about looking at when they are open as well. Especially as you start getting into teenagers.   And I found that one of my teenagers, she'd always like to come and sit on my bed. Just at 11 o'clock at night. Just as I feel like I'm down for the night. And you know that baby is going to start waking up at 6 or 7. And you're just dying to go to sleep. But you know that this is important. She's ready to talk. And so, I need to be available.   Which isn't easy. But also, I think, how do we do that with seven children? Because that's a lot of kids. But my husband and I, we look at dividing and conquering. And then we look at special times. Like daddy time. Or going out with mom. Where I'll take one child to do a chore. Or go shopping. And I think that is really important to think about. How am I intentionally connecting with my child? So, I took a child to Canada recently. And I often will take a different child on different trips that I'm going on.   Laura Dugger: (45:55 - 46:15) Okay, so five minutes right in the morning. Greeting each other. Five minutes before bed. And finding ten minutes of intentional time to connect. Is that one-on-one throughout the day?   Cherilyn Orr: Yes.   Laura Dugger: You've given us so many helpful tips to apply. Is there any other encouragement that you want to make sure that we don't miss out on?   Cherilyn Orr: (46:16 - 47:52) I think when you hear a lot of these stories. First of all, I want you to know that I am not perfect. As a mom, it's a journey. And I don't want you to go away feeling like, I could never do all this. It's a journey one baby step at a time. And I encourage you to get the book. Listen to podcasts. And be able to join that journey. But don't be hard on yourself. And don't feel that sense of guilt and shame. That says, oh my, I messed up. That's okay.   Being able to recognize you messed up is a good thing. And also recognize that you think, oh man, I messed up on my kids. I did all the wrong things. I want to tell you that we all do the best we can with the knowledge that we have. And that's really, really important to know. It's like, this is a journey. And you are doing the best.   I learned all about behavior management. How do I control my child's behavior? And that was how I parented when I started this journey. And it has been a journey to shift into brain science. And to learn as much as I can about the brain science. And how it impacts my child. And to grow and be the parent that God wants me to be. But don't be hard on yourself in that way. That would be my biggest thing is. And to take one baby step. To decide one baby step that you take.   Laura Dugger: (47:52 - 47:57) And where can people find and learn more from you online?   Cherilyn Orr: (47:58 - 48:14) Well, look at the StoplightApproach.org. So that is our website. And you can follow us on Facebook, Instagram, and YouTube. And you can preorder and sign up for your book (Signals: How Brain Science and the Bible Help Parents Raise Resilient Children). You can get that on Amazon.   Laura Dugger: (48:15 - 48:32) Wonderful. We will add those links to the show notes for today's episode. And Cherilyn, you may know we are called The Savvy Sauce. Because savvy is synonymous with practical knowledge. And so is my final question for you today. What is your Savvy Sauce?   Cherilyn Orr: (48:33 - 48:55) I would say that it's not about controlling behavior. It's about connecting with my child. Relationship first rather than behavior first. It's like changing the equation. Relationship is the key. And everything else will flow out of that. And then if you can think of change the brain. Then you'll be able to change the behavior.   Laura Dugger: (48:56 – 49:20) Oh, I love that. That is memorable. And I really appreciate your emphasis on relationship. And it's so helpful to hear your stories of how this has played out over time. And cultures. And how we can now take this common language into our own homes. So, Cherilyn, thank you so much for sharing this research. And your book with us. And thank you for being my guest today.   Cherilyn Orr: (49:21 – 49:23) Thank you for having me.   Laura Dugger: (49:24 – 53:06) One more thing before you go, have you heard the term gospel before? It simply means good news. And I want to share the best news with you, but it starts with the bad news.   Every single one of us were born sinners, but Christ desires to rescue us from our sin, which is something we cannot do for ourselves. This means there's absolutely no chance we can make it to heaven on our own. So, for you and for me, it means we deserve death, and we can never pay back the sacrifice we owe to be saved.   We need a savior, but God loved us so much. He made a way for his only son to willingly die in our place as the perfect substitute. This gives us hope of life forever in right relationship with him.   That is good news. Jesus lived the perfect life. We could never live and died in our place for our sin.   This was God's plan to make a way to reconcile with us so that God can look at us and see Jesus. We can be covered and justified through the work Jesus finished. If we choose to receive what he has done for us, Romans 10:9 says, “that if you confess with your mouth, Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved.”   So, you pray with me now. Heavenly father, thank you for sending Jesus to take our place. I pray someone today right now is touched and chooses to turn their life over to you.   Will you clearly guide them and help them take their next step in faith to declare you as Lord of their life? We trust you to work and change lives now for eternity. In Jesus name we pray.   Amen. If you prayed that prayer, you are declaring him for me. So, me for him, you get the opportunity to live your life for him.   And at this podcast, we're called The Savvy Sauce for a reason. We want to give you practical tools to implement the knowledge you have learned. So, you're ready to get started.   First, tell someone, say it out loud, get a Bible. The first day I made this decision, my parents took me to Barnes and Noble and let me choose my own Bible. I selected the Quest NIV Bible and I love it.   You can start by reading the book of John. Also get connected locally, which just means tell someone who's a part of a church in your community that you made a decision to follow Christ. I'm assuming they will be thrilled to talk with you about further steps such as going to church and getting connected to other believers to encourage you.   We want to celebrate with you too. So, feel free to leave a comment for us here. If you did make a decision to follow Christ, we also have show notes included where you can read scripture that describes this process.   And finally, be encouraged. Luke 15:10 says, “in the same way, I tell you, there is rejoicing in the presence of the angels of God over one sinner who repents.” The heavens are praising with you for your decision today.   And if you've already received this good news, I pray you have someone to share it with. You are loved and I look forward to meeting you here next time.

We are often told that if we work harder, speak louder, and lean in further, the doors of opportunity will eventually swing open. But for many women, the reality is more complex. It isn't just about the effort—it's about the environment.   Today, Cindy Watson sits down with a powerhouse leader who isn't just looking for a seat—she's redesigning the entire room. Joining us is Kae Kronthaler-Williams, a global software marketing executive who has navigated the highest levels of tech while maintaining a fierce commitment to equity. As a passionate advocate for women's advancement, Kae doesn't just talk about the "broken rung"; she provides the tools to fix it. From confronting unconscious bias to dismantling toxic work cultures, her work through public speaking, coaching, and nonprofit initiatives is centered on one radical mission: ensuring every woman is seen, supported, and empowered to lead.   In this episode, Cindy and Kae dive deep into: How to thrive in a system not designed for you. How to claim your space if gender imbalance is present. Setting boundaries to protect your credibility without apologizing. Finding the right allies in your workplace. Negotiating mentorship and allyship in a male dominated workplace. What are the biggest negotiation traps that women in particular fall into? What are some of the feminine approaches that maybe secret weapons? Practical step to take to negotiate your best life. And many more!   Learn more about Kae Kronthaler-Williams: Website: https://www.kaewilliams.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/kaekwilliams/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/kaekronthalerwilliams/ Subtract: https://substack.com/@kaekronthalerwilliams   Get a copy of her book:    Not Made for You: How Women in Tech Can Challenge Bias, Claim Their Space, and Thrive in a System Built for Men   If you're looking to up-level your negotiation skills, I have everything from online to group to my signature one-on-one mastermind & VIP experiences available to help you better leverage your innate power to get more of what you want and deserve in life. Check out our website at www.artofFeminineNegotiation.com if that sounds interesting to you.   Get Cindy's book here: Amazon   https://www.amazon.com/Art-Feminine-Negotiation-Boardroom-Bedroom-ebook/dp/B0B8KPCYZP?inf_contact_key=94d07c699eea186d2adfbddfef6fb9e2&inf_contact_key=013613337189d4d12be8d2bca3c26821680f8914173f9191b1c0223e68310bb1 EBook   https://www.amazon.com/Art-Feminine-Negotiation-Boardroom-Bedroom-ebook/dp/B0B8KPCYZP?inf_contact_key=94d07c699eea186d2adfbddfef6fb9e2&inf_contact_key=013613337189d4d12be8d2bca3c26821680f8914173f9191b1c0223e68310bb1 Barnes and Noble   https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/the-art-of-feminine-negotiation-cindy-watson/1141499614?ean=9781631959776 CONNECT WITH CINDY: Website: www.womenonpurpose.ca Website: www.practicingwithpurpose.org Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/womenonpurposecommunity/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/womenonpurposecoaching/ LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/thecindywatson Show: https://www.womenonpurpose.ca/media/podcast-2/ X(Twitter):  https://twitter.com/womenonpurpose1 YouTube:https://www.youtube.com/@hersuasion Email: cindy@womenonpurpose.ca  

EPISODE 672 - Karin K Jensen - The Strength of Water - An Asian American Coming of Age MemoirThe Sibylline Press edition of The Strength of Water, An Asian American Coming of Age Memoir, is scheduled for release on November 7, 2025! It is available for review on NetGalley and Booksprout. Pre-order on Amazon, Barnes and Noble, and wherever books are sold.In 1920s Detroit, King Ying stands on a box to iron clothes in her parents' laundry business, endures taunts of Ching-Ching Chinaman on the playground, and tries to reconcile what passes for normal in Jazz-Age America with her father's vastly different cultural values.She dreams of a home, the elegance of her Jane Arden paper dolls, and winning her stern father's affection. But when Ba incurs steep debts during the Great Depression, he sends her far from hope to his ancestral village.In remote Tai Ting Pong, in the Guangdong Province of China, she feels as foreign in the land of her heritage as in the country of her birth. She must survive hunger, dangerous superstitions, and Japanese invasion as the Sino-Japanese War begins.When guardian angels help her return to the U.S., it's a chance to seize her American dream.In this inspiring and heartfelt memoir, Karin K. Jensen records her mother's transpacific quest for identity, survival, and new world dreams. The Strength of Water received a coveted starred Kirkus review and was included on Kirkus's annual list of Top 100 Indie Books.Book club discussion questions are included at the end of the book. Invite the author to your book club discussion!From the AuthorThe Strength of Water is my mother's memoir, as told to me, starting in the 1920s and spanning nearly a century. It offers exquisite period details of immigrant life in the U.S. and village life in China.One woman's epic odyssey, one family's story of striving in a foreign country, one generation's unique memory. An amazing memoir where the “strength of water,” the power of resilience and adapting to any circumstance, is the common thread that flows through the whole family, connecting everyone's lives. Touching, inspiring, and brilliantly written.Shen Yang, Author of More Than One ChildThroughout my childhood, my mother told stories of growing up in her father's Detroit laundry business during the infancy of the automobile industry and later in a Cantonese village on the eve of the Sino-Japanese war. She also spoke of what it was like to survive as a live-in domestic worker and teen waitress in mid-century California.The Strength of Water is a daughter's careful excavation of her mother's story; it is a mother's disclosure of history, of trauma, of realities that mark not only her life but the legacy of her daughters'. This is a book written with tremendous love and authenticity. It is an important document of the Asian American experience.Kao Kalia Yang, Award winning author of The Song Poet and The LatehomecomerThese stories felt like mythology, far removed from my experiences growing up in the San Francisco Bay Area, yet vital to preserve as history. When I decided to set them down, I could hear my mother's voice so clearly that I wrote in the first person. Thank you for taking a look.A classic, vividly written immigrant saga - Kirkus ReviewshtSupport the show___https://livingthenextchapter.com/podcast produced by: https://truemediasolutions.ca/Coffee Refills are always appreciated, refill Dave's cup here, and thanks!https://buymeacoffee.com/truemediaca

Whether you're new or aware of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, behavioural activation is a critical part of this therapeutic approach. It focuses on helping a person to do what they love to improve their mood, their mental health and their life. However, as one of my clinical psychology lecturers once said, this is extremely difficult, a lot of people struggle and even psychology students struggle to do behavioural activation when given it as a fun assignment. Yet it is a lot of fun, it is doable and it really can make the world of difference to your mental health. Therefore, in this clinical psychology podcast episode, you'll learn what is behavioural activation, how to do behavioural activation and more fun facts. If you enjoy learning about psychotherapy, cognitive behavioural therapy and mental health, then this will be a great episode for you.In the psychology news section, you'll learn why half of people arrested in London might have undiagnosed ADHD, how a new study makes a great case for weekend lie ins, and why the overwhelming majority of women in STEM might feel like imposters.LISTEN NOW!If you want to support the podcast, please check out:FREE AND EXCLUSIVE 8 PSYCHOLOGY BOOK BOXSET- https://www.subscribepage.io/psychologyboxsetCBT For Depression: A Clinical Psychology Introduction to Cognitive Behavioural Therapy for Depression- https://www.connorwhiteley.net/cbt-for-depression Available from all major eBook retailers and you can order the paperback and hardback copies from Amazon, your local bookstore and local library, if you request it. Also available as an AI-narrated audiobook from selected audiobook platforms and libraries systems. For example, Kobo, Spotify, Barnes and Noble, Google Play, Overdrive, Baker and Taylor and Bibliotheca. Patreon- patreon.com/ThePsychologyWorldPodcast#cbt #behaviouralactivation #behavioralactivation #cognitivebehaviouraltherapy #cognitivetherapy #psychotherapy #behaviouraltherapy #clinicalpsychology #mentalhealth #clinicalmentalhealth #clinicalpsychologist #mentalhealthawareness #mentalhealthsupport #mentalhealthadvocate #psychology #psychology_facts #psychologyfacts #psychologyfact #psychologystudent #psychologystudents #podcast #podcasts

In Part 2 of the Food Noise series, Kathryn explores how the modern food environment and intense cultural pressure around bodies and weight contributes to an overabundance of thoughts about food. This episode is designed to help you better understand why the noise shows up, so you can approach it with less self-blame and more self-compassion. Kathryn acknowledges that some people are more sensitive to today's environment than others and uses a thoughtful comparison to other natural drives to show that increased “noise” doesn't have to dictate your actions. Episode mentioned: Ep. 198: Food Noise, Part 1: Bingeing is Not a Solution Episode 183: GLP-1 Medications, Food Noise, and Binge Eating Recovery with Marcus Kain Brain over Binge resources: Get the FREE 30-day Inspiration Booklet Get personalized support with one-on-one coaching or group coaching Subscribe to the Brain over Binge Course for only $18.99 per month Get the Second Edition of Brain over Binge on Amazon and Audible, BarnesandNoble.com, Apple iBooks, or Kobo. Get the Brain over Binge Recovery Guide   Disclaimer: *The Brain over Binge Podcast is produced and recorded by Brain over Binge Recovery Coaching, LLC. All work is copyrighted by Brain over Binge Recovery Coaching, LLC, and all rights are reserved. As a disclaimer, the hosts of the Brain over Binge Podcast are not professional counselors or licensed healthcare providers, and this podcast is not a substitute for medical advice or any form of professional therapy. Eating disorders can have serious health consequences and you are strongly advised to seek medical attention for matters relating to your health. Please get help when you need it, and good luck on your journey.

Timestamps:  00:00 - Welcome & Introduction  00:49 - The Problem: Negativity in Virtual World  01:40 - The Power of Gratitude  02:25 - Morning Gratitude Practices  03:38 - Focus on Happy Memories  04:00 - Finding Your Higher Purpose  04:30 - The Science of Purpose  05:08 - Q&A: Carbs & Healthy Alternatives  06:27 - Mind, Body & Soul Connection  06:55 - Advice for Parents  07:46 - Failure as Part of Success  08:16 - Spiritual Connection & Community  08:21 - What The Holistic Kids Do  08:47 - Q&A: Best Cooking Oils  10:20 - About the Book  11:26 - Q&A: Getting Kids to Eat Vegetables  14:02 - Wrap-Up & Call to Action  14:33 - Outro & Disclaimer   ₹Teen Health Revolution: The Power of Gratitude and Spiritual Wellness Welcome to another Monday Live episode of The Holistic Kids Show, where kids educate and empower kids from the inside out! In this transformative session, we explore how spiritual health and gratitude can revolutionize your teen years. The Problem with Negativity: In today's world, we spend hours in a virtual reality that only highlights the good in people's lives, making it easy to view our own lives as "less than." This negative comparison leads to harmful self-talk, which affects our subconscious mind and can even lead to physical sickness. The Solution: Gratitude & Positive Mindset We share powerful practices to rewire your brain for positivity: Morning Gratitude Ritual: Say 10 things you're grateful for each morning Sticky Note Strategy: Place gratitude reminders around your home Gratitude Journaling: Daily practice to shift your subconscious mind Reframing Negatives: Turn challenging situations into opportunities for growth Finding Your Higher Purpose: Everyone has been put on this planet for a unique purpose. Through mindfulness and gratitude, you can develop a positive attitude and discover what you're meant to do. Research shows that having a strong sense of purpose: Reduces stress hormone (cortisol) levels Prevents self-esteem from fluctuating based on social media likes Improves overall health markers Builds resilience during challenging times Live Q&A Highlights: Best cooking oils: Avocado and olive oil (non-GMO options) Healthy carb alternatives: Focus on vegetables vs. ultra-processed carbs Getting kids to eat vegetables: Sneaking them into smoothies, using hunger timing, and removing junk food from the house About Our Book: We're celebrating being bestselling authors! "Teen Health Revolution" is now available on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, and local bookstores. The book features: Section 1: Why we need this revolution (statistics and rates) Section 2: The REVOLUTION acronym - principles for each letter Section 3: Healing 20 chronic conditions naturally What The Holistic Kids Do: ✓ Practice daily gratitude ✓ Focus on positives automatically (it's now in our subconscious!) ✓ Maintain a strong spiritual connection ✓ Stay connected to something bigger than ourselves ✓ Work toward a higher purpose Key Takeaways: Gratitude is a universal spiritual practice that positively affects your brain, body, and behavior 90% of our thoughts and actions come from our subconscious mind Positive energy boosts optimism and prevents disease Your failures don't define you - setbacks are actually steps forward You attract what you put out into the universe Join us every Monday for more live sessions where we answer your questions about holistic health, nutrition, and teen wellness! Connect With Us: Instagram: @theholistickidsshow Facebook, YouTube, and all social platforms Disclaimer: This podcast is for informational purposes only. The statements and views reflected are not to be taken as medical advice.   ---- Learn more about Dr. Madiha Saeed at https://holisticmommd.com, or follow her on social media @HolisticMomMD

In this episode of Cryptid Warfare, I sit down with Dr. Dennis Carroll to confront one of the most dangerous and misunderstood realities of spiritual warfare: familiar spirits and spiritual blindness. Why do some people seem irrationally hostile toward you? Why does darkness recognize light—and seek to destroy it? Dr. Carroll breaks down the unsettling truth that hatred, manipulation, and spiritual sabotage often stem from cooperation between humans and assigned familiar spirits. When darkness is accepted, it authorizes itself—blinding the host to their own thoughts, actions, and moral collapse. Drawing from Scripture and excerpts from The Demon Factor: Beyond the Edge of Supernatural Darkness, we expose the hierarchy of the Kingdom of Darkness—from Satan as the Prince of the Power of the Air, to fallen angels, demons, serpent-seed human agents, and even cryptid entities born of shadow science and black magic. This episode dives deep into:   The biblical definition of familiar spirits How witchcraft and “shadow work” function as spiritual contracts Why spiritual blindness is voluntary before it becomes enslaving The concept of serpent seed and human agents of darkness God's explicit warnings in Exodus, Leviticus, and Deuteronomy against sorcery, divination, mediums, and spiritism     Scripture is clear: consulting familiar spirits is not spiritual enlightenment—it is rebellion, defilement, and alignment with forces hostile to God and humanity.   This is not speculation. This is not metaphor. This is spiritual warfare, exposed.   Listener discretion advised. This episode pulls no punches.     Dr. Dennis Carroll is a National and Internationally Known Writer/Author and an Authority on The Occult and Folklore. His career in all Fields of the Paranormal and The Supernatural has spanned over 55+ Years. He is a Spiritual Research and Demonology Consultant and a Cryptid and Ufology Investigative Field Researcher. He is a Retired Law Enforcement Officer, an Ordained Minister, Doctor of Metaphysics, Parapsychologist and A Certified Paranormal Investigator. His Books are on Amazon and Barnes/Noble. Website: denniswcarroll.com Email: denniswcarroll@gmail.com.)   Ways to Support and Connect with Dr. Dennis Carroll (Hunting the Shadows) :  https://youtube.com/@huntingtheshadows denniswcarroll.com denniswcarroll@gmail.com     Help a brother out and buy me a Coffee  (Monthly or one time donation keeps the show going): We know there is room for improvement and have decided to ask you (Our amazing listeners) to help the podcast grow! This will help with better audio, expedition funding, and much more!   https://venmo.com/u/cryptidwarfare     Email me:  Podcast Cryptidwarfare@gmail.com   Critter/Cryptid Control/Consulting  C.WOPPS@protonmail.com C.woperations17905@gmail.com         Help support our mission in giving you the best podcast on ? Anchor.fm/Spotify, iTunes, Podbean +   Make sure to give me a ️️️️️ review :). Thank yall!    Cryptid Warfare: https://www.instagram.com/cryptid_warfare_pod_cast/ youtube: www.youtube.com/@cryptidwarfare     Business Shout Outs:   C.W OPERATIONS & SURVIVAL  Owner & Operator : Drew M Critter Hitters / Monster Hunters for Hire email: c.woperations17905@gmail.com. or  C.WOPPS@protonmail.com    Tier1 Restoration  Brain Cochrans phone = 615-809-9839 https://tier1restoration.godaddysites.com/   Bearded Brothers Trucking  Danny Vega  https://vegabrostn.com/   BerryHill Window Cleaning  https://www.berryhillwindowcleaningtn.com/     The Tac Patch  https://www.instagram.com/thetacpatch_?igsh=MWFidzk3d2tib3Ztdw== https://thetacpatch.com/   FLatTopK9  Owner - Tim Russell  www.FlatTopK9.com   Stead Fast OverLand Owner - Jerrett Hudson https://www.instagram.com/steadfastoverland?utm_source=ig_web_button_share_sheet&igsh=ZDNlZDc0MzIxNw==     kingdom.defense.llc   Part Owner : Mr. Charlie  https://www.instagram.com/kingdom.defense.llc?utm_source=ig_web_button_share_sheet&igsh=ZDNlZDc0MzIxNw==   https://www.instagram.com/anestillc?utm_source=ig_web_button_share_sheet&igsh=ZDNlZDc0MzIxNw==     Amazing outtro ? by my friend D & Andrew (Walking Lightly Tones Studios Music) as well as Paul. Check out CallhimD Spotify and Instagram give him a listen/follow https://open.spotify.com/artist/16BHUS6UGILgxsBEUxqQJ https://www.instagram.com/call.him.d?utm_source=ig_web_button_share_sheet&igsh=ZDNlZDc0MzIxNw==                                                                                                                        

Upgrade to the Premium Podcast Experience - https://rachelhollis.supercast.comDive even Deeper in the Coaching Community - Rachel Hollis CoachingCheck out Upcoming Live Events!!In this episode, Rachel Hollis delves into the destructive nature of comparing ourselves to others. Through personal anecdotes and insights, she explores why we feel the need to compare and how it often leads to measuring our lives against superficial metrics. Rachel highlights the importance of focusing on our own paths and internal metrics of joy, peace, and fulfillment.Get your copy of Rachel's New Book Here: Audible, Amazon, Barnes & Noble, Books-A-Millon, Bookshop.org, or wherever books are sold!00:39 Welcome to the Show01:10 The Death of Joy: Understanding Comparison01:45 A Childhood Story: The Heartbeat Project04:24 The Real Issue with Comparison05:16 Why We Compare Ourselves07:25 A Personal Anecdote: The Bar Class Experience12:19 The Problem with Visible Success14:05 The Cost of Success17:31 Comparison as Self-Punishment18:50 Taking Responsibility for Your Own Life24:51 Dealing with Negative Self-Talk26:55 Jealousy as a Guide29:22 Conclusion: Embrace Your JourneySign up for Rachel's weekly email: https://msrachelhollis.com/insider/Call the podcast hotline and leave a voicemail! Call (737) 400-4626Watch the podcast on YouTube: http://youtube.com/@MsRachelHollisFollow along on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/MsRachelHollisTo learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Construction leaders are being told—daily—that AI, automation, dashboards, and optimization are the future. But what if the very things we're rushing to automate are the things that actually make leadership work?   In this episode, Bradley Hartmann explores a surprising case study: the resurgence of Barnes & Noble, a 140-year-old, paper-and-ink business thriving in the age of AI and Amazon.   Using the Barnes & Noble turnaround as a lens, this episode breaks down two leadership capabilities AI will never replicate—and why they matter more than ever in construction:   Being a genuine fan of the work, the customer, and the people doing the work Taste and human judgment—knowing what matters, what doesn't, and when timing matters more than data.     This isn't a story about books.   It's a story about leadership, accountability, and change in old, complex industries—just like construction.   This episode will help you:   Identify where your organization may be over-centralized or over-optimized Reclaim leadership leverage that no software can replace Make better decisions about what to abandon, not just what to add Lead change without losing trust, judgment, or accountability   You'll walk away with a clearer lens on what great construction leadership actually requires in the age of AI.   If Barnes & Noble can come back by falling back in love with books, imagine what could happen in construction if leaders fell back in love with building—and the people who make it happen.   https://www.honest-broker.com/p/what-can-we-learn-from-barnes-and   https://substack.com/@tedgioia   At Bradley Hartmann & Company, we help construction teams improve sales, leadership,  and communication by reducing miscommunication, strengthening teamwork, and bridging language gaps between English and Spanish speakers. To learn more about our product offerings, visit bradleyhartmannandco.com.   The Construction Leadership Podcast dives into essential leadership topics in construction, including strategy, emotional intelligence, communication skills, confidence, innovation, and effective decision-making. You'll also gain insights into delegation, cultural intelligence, goal setting, team building, employee engagement, and how to overcome common culture problems—whether you're leading a crew or managing an entire organization.   Have topic ideas or guest recommendations? Contact us at info@bradleyhartmannandco.com.   New podcasts are dropped every Tuesday and Thursday.     This episode is brought to you by The Construction Spanish Toolbox —the most practical way for construction teams to learn jobsite-ready Spanish in just minutes a day over 6 months.      

On this episode, we define obesity and overweight status and describe their clinical impact, etiologies, and underlying pathophysiology. We also compare and contrast the efficacy, safety profiles, mechanisms of action, and appropriate use of available weight loss medications and nonpharmacologic approaches. Cole and I are happy to share that our listeners can claim ACPE-accredited continuing education for listening to this podcast episode! We have continued to partner with freeCE.com to provide listeners with the opportunity to claim 1-hour of continuing education credit for select episodes. For existing Unlimited (Gold) freeCE members, this CE option is included in your membership benefits at no additional cost! A password, which will be given at some point during this episode, is required to access the post-activity test. To earn credit for this episode, visit the following link below to go to freeCE's website: https://www.freece.com/ If you're not currently a freeCE member, we definitely suggest you explore all the benefits of their Unlimited Membership on their website and earn CE for listening to this podcast. Thanks for listening! If you want to support the podcast, check out our Patreon account. Subscribers will have access to all previous and new pharmacotherapy lectures as well as downloadable PowerPoint slides for each lecture. If you purchase an annual membership, you'll also get a free digital copy of High-Powered Medicine 3rd edition by Dr. Alex Poppen, PharmD. HPM is a book/website database of summaries for over 150 landmark clinical trials.You can visit our Patreon page at the website below:  www.patreon.com/corconsultrx We want to give a big thanks to Dr. Alex Poppen, PharmD and High-Powered Medicine for sponsoring the podcast..  You can get a copy of HPM at the links below:  Purchase a subscription or PDF copy - https://highpoweredmedicine.com/ Purchase the paperback and hardcover - Barnes and Noble website We want to say thank you to our sponsor, Pyrls. Try out their drug information app today. Visit the website below for a free trial: www.pyrls.com/corconsultrx We also want to thank our sponsor Freed AI. Freed is an AI scribe that listens, prepares your SOAP notes, and writes patient instructions. Charting is done before your patient walks out of the room. You can try 10 notes for free and after that it only costs $99/month. Visit the website below for more information: https://www.getfreed.ai/  If you have any questions for Cole or me, reach out to us via e-mail: Mike - mcorvino@corconsultrx.com Cole - cswanson@corconsultrx.com

Jeffrey Deskovic's life changed forever when he was convicted of a murder he did not commit at just 17 years old. He maintained his innocence for the next 16 years and then, with the help of the Innocence Project, the real person responsible was finally caught and Jeff was released from prison. Now you may be asking yourself, 'Hey, how is this a GOOD story?' The answer is found in what Jeff did after this all happened: He went to law school, became an attorney and founded the Deskovic Foundation, a non-profit organization dedicated to the exoneration of the wrongfully convicted, their recovery, and reform of the system. This is one person's journey from the darkest of places to finding and creating his own light and we gotta tell ya, it doesn't get much more inspiring than this. Today's episode is Part 2 of 2. ________________________ Steve's third book in his cozy mystery series, THE DOG WALKING DETECTIVES is finally here: SEASON'S SLAYINGS! Get your copy on Amazon: https://bit.ly/3WYTPiR or Barnes & Noble: https://bit.ly/4hOjILR Grab the first two: Book 1: DROWN TOWN Amazon: https://amzn.to/478W8mp Barnes & Noble: https://bit.ly/3Mv7cCk & Book 2: MURDER UNMASKED Amazon: https://shorturl.at/fDR47 Barnes & Noble: https://shorturl.at/3ccTy

282. Family Sabbath: Pause and Delight with Eryn Lynum   Mark 2:27 NIV “Then he said to them, “The Sabbath was made for man, not man for the Sabbath.”   *Transcription Below*   Eryn Lynum is a certified Master Naturalist, Bible teacher, national speaker, and author. Eryn lives in Northern Colorado with her husband, Grayson, and their four children, whom they homeschool—mainly in the great outdoors. Eryn has has been featured on FamilyLife Today, Proverbs 31 Ministries, Christian Parenting, MOPS International, Bible Gateway, Her View From Home, and For Every Mom. Every opportunity she gets, she is out exploring God's creation with her family and sharing the adventures. To learn more about Eryn, visit ErynLynum.com.   Eryn's Books Eryn's Free Resources Mentioned Nat Theo Podcast   Topics and Questions We Cover: What can this look like to daily align our activities with our deepest values? What do people actually do on this day of rest and what do you recommend for families? Are there any other practical benefits we're missing out on if we neglect rest?   Thank You to Our Sponsor: Leman Property Management Company   Related Savvy Sauce Episodes: 81 Rest with Doctor, Author, and Speaker, Dr. Saundra Dalton-Smith 99 Sabbath Rest with Sandy Feit 175 Practicing Sabbath with Shireen Eldridge   Connect with The Savvy Sauce on Facebook, Instagram or Our Website   Gospel Scripture: (all NIV) Romans 3:23 “for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God,”   Romans 3:24 “and are justified freely by his grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus.”   Romans 3:25 (a) “God presented him as a sacrifice of atonement, through faith in his blood.”    Hebrews 9:22 (b) “without the shedding of blood there is no forgiveness.”    Romans 5:8 “But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.”    Romans 5:11 “Not only is this so, but we also rejoice in God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have now received reconciliation.”    John 3:16 “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.”   Romans 10:9 “That if you confess with your mouth, “Jesus is Lord,” and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved.”    Luke 15:10 says “In the same way, I tell you, there is rejoicing in the presence of the angels of God over one sinner who repents.”   Romans 8:1 “Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus”   Ephesians 1:13–14 “And you also were included in Christ when you heard the word of truth, the gospel of your salvation. Having believed, you were marked in him with a seal, the promised Holy Spirit, who is a deposit guaranteeing our inheritance until the redemption of those who are God's possession- to the praise of his glory.”   Ephesians 1:15–23 “For this reason, ever since I heard about your faith in the Lord Jesus and your love for all the saints, I have not stopped giving thanks for you, remembering you in my prayers. I keep asking that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the glorious Father, may give you the spirit of wisdom and revelation, so that you may know him better. I pray also that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you, the riches of his glorious inheritance in the saints, and his incomparably great power for us who believe. That power is like the working of his mighty strength, which he exerted in Christ when he raised him from the dead and seated him at his right hand in the heavenly realms, far above all rule and authority, power and dominion, and every title that can be given, not only in the present age but also in the one to come. And God placed all things under his feet and appointed him to be head over everything for the church, which is his body, the fullness of him who fills everything in every way.”   Ephesians 2:8–10 “For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith – and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God – not by works, so that no one can boast. For we are God‘s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.“   Ephesians 2:13 “But now in Christ Jesus you who once were far away have been brought near through the blood of Christ.“   Philippians 1:6 “being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.”   *Transcription*   Music: (0:00 – 0:09)   Laura Dugger: (0:11 - 1:34) Welcome to The Savvy Sauce, where we have practical chats for intentional living. I'm your host, Laura Dugger, and I'm so glad you're here.   Leman Property Management Company has the apartment you will be able to call home, with over 1,700 apartment units available in Central Illinois. Visit them today at lemanproperties.com or connect with them on Facebook.   Eryn Lynum is my wonderful guest for today, and she's the author of this beautiful book, The Nature of Rest. We're going to discuss all things related to rest, ways that we can prepare for it, how we can enjoy and delight in it, what good gifts God has for us with rest, and then how to reflect well on the rhythms in our life, and so much more.   Here's our chat. Welcome to The Savvy Sauce, Eryn.   Eryn Lynum: (1:34 - 4:03) Thank you. Thanks so much for having me.   Laura Dugger: Well, I'd love for you to start us off by sharing your personal journey and tell why you are so uniquely qualified to teach and write about rest, as stress can literally kill you.   Eryn Lynum: Yeah, that's correct. So, when I was 14 years old, I was diagnosed with a potentially fatal autoimmune disorder. And kind of the context of that season, I was preparing to go overseas for the first time on a missions trip. So, I was going to be in Africa for two months. And so, before you go do something like that, you have to go to the doctor and get a checkup and vaccine recommendations, all the things. And so, my parents took me in.   Again, I was 14 at the time, and we had no reason to believe that there was anything wrong. There were no red flags. Besides, I had been a little tired, a little dizzy once in a while, but really, we just thought, okay, well, I'm growing up, my body's changing. But when the nurse took my blood pressure that day, it was 56 over 48, which is deathly low.   And so, immediately, that's a red flag. And I undergo more testing and hospital visits and seeing specialists. And they diagnosed me with something called Addison's disease. And Addison's disease, it's where your adrenal glands no longer function. So, maybe you've heard of adrenal fatigue, where someone is so taxed out that their adrenal glands can't keep up because they're meant to produce cortisol, which is our stress hormone. Well, Addison's disease is the worst-case scenario where you can't come back from it, barring a miracle. Like, my adrenal glands don't work, and they haven't for over 20 years now.   And so, you know, this system that God has given us meant to cope with stress, and it's that fight-or-flight response. At that young age, I no longer had that. And so, stress became quite literally deadly to me. And at that point, my parents, they began coaching me in biblical stress management, so identifying stressors in my life.   You know, when your shoulders start creeping up, and you can feel that tension in your neck, and knowing that those are signs that, okay, you need to step back, you need to calm yourself. Like the Psalms talk about, “I have calmed and quieted my soul,” and to bring everything to the Lord and cast all your anxieties upon Him. And this is really where I can see, in my life, I developed a very consistent prayer pattern in my life where just all day long, like conversing with the Lord.   And so, that's been a big part of this. But yeah, that's really what began leading me into this deeply restful lifestyle was out of necessity. But really what I've seen since then is God designed all of us to live and thrive through rest. Like this is His original design.   Laura Dugger: (4:04 - 4:27) I love that so much. And you articulate this so well in your book. But before I ever encountered you, I had never heard of the term master naturalist before. So, if you want to share anything about that, it would be great. And as a master naturalist, where do you see these rhythms of rest in nature?   Eryn Lynum: (4:28 - 6:54) So, a master naturalist, it's really a fancy term for nature teacher. And I pursued this because my degree and my passion are in biblical theology. And I've always been passionate about rightly handling God's word of truth from 2 Timothy 2:15.   And I began to see as my own family, my husband and I, we have three boys and a daughter, and now they're 14 down to seven. But when they were younger and we started spending more time outdoors, I started to see, okay, God has given us so many visuals and materials in nature with which we can teach about Him. Coming from Romans 1:20, that His invisible attributes, those things we can't see about God, are clearly perceived through what He has made. And I saw that also Jesus in the gospels, He used nature all the time to teach.   And God throughout scripture, like it's not just Genesis 1, nature narratives are strong throughout scripture. And so, I thought if God and Jesus use this methodology to teach, then certainly we can. And so, that's why I went through this training and taught, teach with this method is because, you know, the more we understand these materials, the more we see of God and the more we can communicate about Him.   And so, I was working as a master naturalist in our city and teaching my own programs. And I started to incorporate it more and more into my book and then later on in my podcast. And at the same time, God was leading my family into celebrating Sabbath. We had come into this season where we were just exhausted, like running businesses and raising and homeschooling kids, like all of us, no matter our circumstances, face this very real human existence of fatigue. And so, we came to a place where rest was no longer optional. It was critical and vital.   And so, I'm living in these two realms of learning about nature while I'm learning about scripture. And then God is bringing us into deep rest. So, I started to ask the question, where do we see rest in scripture? And I found that it is everywhere. The roots of rest run deep and wide throughout scripture. And also asking, where do we see rest in creation in nature? And it's also everywhere there that God designed all these cycles and these rhythms and all of his plants and creatures, even the ones that we think of as so frenetic and busy that God designed them to thrive through rest.   Laura Dugger: (6:55 - 7:04) And will you give a specific example then of something in nature as it's so apparent that it's designed for rest?   Eryn Lynum: (7:04 - 8:28) Definitely. Let's focus on one of those ones that we often think of as really busy, the hummingbird. I opened the book with the analogy of a hummingbird because when you think about a hummingbird, what do you picture in your mind?   Laura Dugger: (7:17 - 7:19) Busy, constant movement in and out.   Eryn Lynum: (7:20 - 8:28) Yeah, exactly. Like they have to visit between 1,000 and 2,000 flowers every day to get all the nectar that they need. And so, they are always like here and there in the next place. And they look like this little thing just zipping through the air and you can't even see their wings beating because they can be up to 70 times a second. It's this blur of motion. And we think about that little hummingbird, and we can sometimes feel like that little hummingbird just zipping from one thing to the next, thinking there's no time to stop.   But the hummingbird does stop. It has a very strategic method of rest called torpor. And torpor is kind of like a mini hibernation where the little bird is going to go into this deep state of rest. It lowers its body temperature by around 50 degrees and becomes completely unresponsive. And this is a regular thing that the hummingbird does, and it enables it to continue its God-given, good, busy, fruitful work. So, it's this picture of, you know, busyness is not bad. God created us for fruitful work, but it's all meant to be sustained through deep, rhythmic, intentional rest.   Laura Dugger: (8:28 - 9:06) I mean, immediately that makes me think of the weeks, even that I'm most productive, I've probably prioritized my sleep the best of it. And if I get great sleep, even if it's extra hours, that doesn't take away from the rest of the day. That probably makes my time even multiplied.   Yeah. Yeah, absolutely. And I love, you point out so many times how God just clearly designed his creation to enjoy this gift of rest. So, you mentioned some of the nature parts. What about some of the foundational scriptural truths on this topic?   Eryn Lynum: (9:07 - 11:52) Yeah, well, of course, where's the first place that we get the idea of rest in the scripture? Yeah, exactly. So, God completes his work of creation and then he rests and he didn't need to rest. Isaiah 40:28 tells us that he, the creator of the world does not grow weary or tired.   I believe that one reason, and I talk about a couple of them in the book, but I believe that one main reason God rested was to stop and delight. That word Sabbath, it comes from the Hebrew word Shabbat, which can mean to both stop and delight. Like think about God finishing his creative work, bringing, bringing everything from nothing. Ex nihilo is that theological term, everything from nothing. Creating not only the animals and the plants, but the textures and the math and the shapes and the like everything he needed to make these things. And I imagine he just wanted to stop and enjoy it. I can even picture him going through creation and listening to the birds and taking in the colors and the shapes of the clouds.   What a beautiful reminder to us, because I know for myself, I'm so prone to just run from one thing to the next, like check it off the list. What's next? But here God is modeling for us. Stop delight, praise him for what he just allowed us to accomplish, to create, to do before rushing on to the next thing.   And so, we get that first mentioned there at creation, but then think about when Sabbath was actually established, there's a framework, there's a structure it's Exodus 16. And the context here is the Israelites. They're doing what they do. They're wandering and grumbling. They're hangry and God shows mercy to them in the form of quail and manna, but he has very specific instructions for them. He says for six days, you shall gather it, but not on the seventh day. Don't go out. It is a solemn day, a Holy Sabbath to the Lord.   That's the first mention of Sabbath, that word in scripture, but consider the Israelites. They had no context for what God was calling them to do. Surely they could think back to the creation story. Okay. God worked and then rested, but they had very little idea of what he was asking them to do. This was an act of faith. God was saying, stop gathering, trust me.   And this is so hard for us because like we are so prone to gather, gather, gather, do produce work more out of this scarcity mindset. But this picture is showing God is a God of abundance and his math works. When we trust him to be the provider, not ourselves. And we take that risk on rest. He provides abundantly through it.   Laura Dugger: (11:53 - 12:05) Absolutely. And within this gift then of rest, how can rest actually reorder and re-energize our lives?   Eryn Lynum: (12:05 - 14:03) I love this question because throughout the book, we talk a lot about reordering and creating margins. So, we can rest and reprioritizing. You know, it's so interesting when we look at the creation narrative, where we get that first mention of rest, because it's backwards to what we normally think.   Think about this. God created for six days and then he rested. Adam, the first human was created on that sixth day. So, Adam's first full day was a day of arrest, dedicated to rest. And in this, we see that God worked and then rested. But we, humanity, we were always meant to begin from rest.   And you see that even in the Hebrew tradition of a day, their day begins at evening. Their day doesn't start with, let's get up and get to work. Their day starts with, let me go to rest to get ready for the work. So, first we have to reorder our concept of rest, not see it as a reward. Oh, I'm going to work, work, work, get all the things done so that maybe I can rest this weekend or on vacation, or when the kids are out of the house or in retirement, that's backwards to the biblical framework. We are meant to begin from rest.   So, starting there. And as we do that, my family has found after sabbathing for three and a half years now, everything else kind of falls into place. And that happens when you operate by God's design. You know, rest allows us to tend to the most important things. Those deep values, whether like that should be of course, faith and family. So, getting clear on your values is really important. Like what is most important to your family faith? Maybe it's community generosity. Maybe it's physical health, mental health, all these things do better. And we have more time to tend to them when we first make room and space for rest.   Laura Dugger: (14:04 - 16:28) And now a brief message from our sponsor.    With over 1,700 apartment units available throughout Pekin, Peoria, Peoria Heights, Morton and Washington. And with every price range covered, you will have plenty of options when you rent through Leman Property Management Company.   They have townhomes, duplexes, studios, and garden style options located in many areas throughout Pekin. And make sure you check out their newest offering, the McKinley located in Pekin is a new construction addition to their platinum collection featuring nine foot ceilings, large spacious layouts, beautiful finishes, such as courts, countertops, and garages. You won't want to miss this outstanding new property in Peoria, a historic downtown location and apartments adjacent to OSF Medical Center provide excellent choices.   Check out their brand new luxury property in Peoria Heights, overlooking the boutique shops and fine dining on prospect. And in Morton, they offer a variety of apartment homes with garages, a hot downtown location, and now a brand new high-end complex near Idlewood Park. If you want to become part of their team, contact them about open office positions.   They're also hiring in their maintenance department. So, we invite you to find out why so many people have chosen to make a career with them. Check them out on Facebook today or email their friendly staff at leasing@lemanprops.com. You can also stop by their website at lemanproperties.com, check them out and find your place to call home today.   It never ceases to amaze me how God's economy and his math are just different. Sometimes upside down from ours, but I feel like when you're speaking, it reminds me of Matthew 6:33, “But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things will be added unto you.” So, if we actually obey, I think there are so many blessings that we can enjoy from this gift of rest. So, you're talking about our values. Then what can this look like to daily align our activities with our deepest values?   Eryn Lynum: (16:30 - 18:30) Yes, this is an ongoing practice because the enemy is always trying to distract us from what is most important. And that word there is key distract. And so, first we have to learn to identify those distractions, the things that are pulling us away from what is most important, but you know, getting to those core values and on my website, I have, my husband and I developed a family values guide that helps you step by step to really figure out what are our deepest values.   So, that's erinlynum.com/values. But really what it is, is this practice of getting clear on God's best for, for us and for our families and for those around us and, and making sure that we are aligning and realigning because it's going to get out of alignment, those values with God's agenda. You know, a lot of days I just start my day with a restful pause.   I call them in the book, Selah pauses. And I am quite literally, I am sitting before the Lord, my eyes closed and my hands just up in this posture of surrender and receiving. And I will say, Lord, I am surrendering my own agenda, my own expectations for this day. And I want to receive your power, your presence, your peace. And then throughout the day, just taking those checks.   Like I practice these daily Selah pauses and moments of rest because think about Selah in the Psalms. It can mean to pause, to contemplate, to redirect. And we need to do that often because as a day goes on, I think we lose energy and focus. You know, at the beginning of the day, we might feel really like focused. And this is what I'm getting done today. And that can waver like that can wane out as the day goes on. And so, constantly just checking back in.   Okay, Lord, what is it you have for me to do today? And how do I tend to those most important things? But you have to take that restful pause to be able to do that.   Laura Dugger: (18:31 - 18:46) That's good reminder. Okay. So, to check back in with the Lord and then can you give another example of one family and what their value is and how they live that out in their daily life. And maybe even what requires us to say no to.   Eryn Lynum: (18:47 - 20:15) Ooh, that's a fantastic question. Hmm. Can it be for my own family or do you want me to give them love it from your own family?   Okay. I was asked this question recently. Someone asked me, how do you make time to be outside as a family? One of our core family values is to be out exploring in God's creation. And this has been harder in different seasons. And we have two middle schoolers now, you know, we are, we have a lot going on.   And so, it can very quickly happen where at the end of the day, we're like, wow, we really didn't spend much time outdoors today, but how we prioritize this is you do have to say no to other things. So, we're a homeschooling family. And just as an example, it can be very tempting to feel like, am I doing enough? Am I teaching them enough? We need to check off all these boxes and get the lessons done. And it's constantly surrendering that and realizing, you know, I know that our value of being outdoors is important to God. I know that he is meeting my children there. He is meeting me there. He is giving us rest and rejuvenation there.   So, trusting with that, again, going back to the Israelites, stop gathering, stop checking off all the boxes, stop trying to provide and meet your own expectations. And instead stay super focused on what God has called you to and ruthlessly get rid of the rest, anything that's keeping you from that.   Laura Dugger: (20:16 - 20:36) I love that personal example. Thank you for sharing. And how can we also in our own families or in our own life, how can we distinguish which activities are vital for the abundant life in Christ that he offers so that we don't settle for less?   Eryn Lynum: (20:38 - 22:46) I love that you bring up that, that term, the abundant life. In John 10:10, that Christ came, that we might have life and life abundantly overflowing to the fullest, like brimming over is what that word means. And that scripture also says the enemy comes to steal and kill and destroy.   And I believe that one of the enemy's biggest schemes and methods for that is to send us into hurry and hustle mode. And he does that through distraction and discontent. And so, so much of this is pressing back against distraction and discontent and getting back to how God created us to thrive.   And again, I believe that that is through this, this gift of rest. You know, you talk about, you asked about settling for less. The enemy is going to put a million things in our life that would cause us to want to settle for less.   Let me give you an example of him trying to distract us. There was a recent weekend where we were coming up on the weekend, and I had several friends reach out and ask about me doing these things like these different opportunities coming our way. Like, do you want to do this? Do you want to do this? And each of them were for on Saturday and that's usually when our family Sabbaths. And so, I had this tension because these were good things.   It's hard to say no to a good thing, but I kept feeling again and again, the Lord saying, no, rest with your family, rest with your family. And it was so sweet because come Saturday morning, I was out on our back deck sipping coffee with my husband for hours, having incredible conversations, reading great books. The kids are playing in the yard.   Several times I caught myself thinking, I almost said no to this by saying yes to other things. And again, they were good things. This life is full of good things, but God's rest is one of the best things for our families. So, it's learning to be okay with saying no to those good things. So, you can say yes to that better thing.   Laura Dugger: (22:48 - 23:17) Examples are so helpful. And that requires a level of discernment and going to the Lord to ask him, but I'm wondering if you even have a system in place for how you discern that, or is it a gut piece that you follow or any practical ways that each of us can discern what's the right kind of busy that's good. And what's the wrong kind of busy and the things that we want to say no to.   Eryn Lynum: (23:18 - 25:05) Yeah. Going back to, again, busy is not bad. God created us for fruitful work, but I think, you know, when we are following Christ and God's spirit is within us, he's going to give us that sense of this is the right kind of busy.   This is the wrong kind of busy. And practically, you know, if it has any notion of distraction, like if you're doing this thing to just distract you or to procrastinate on better things, if it has a note of busyness, you know, some people will be like, well, some people, the enemy makes us want to think that sitting on our phones can be restful because you're not technically doing much of anything, but that distraction is stealing God's true gift of rest for us.   And so, you know, our family, as we practice Sabbath throughout the week, I know that come Saturday, we have a full day of rest. And sometimes it's tempting to add a little work into there, to let it seep out of those edges of the work week and kind of into our Sabbath. And as you practice this more and more and begin just ruthlessly protecting that time, whether it's a full day, whether you start with a half day, God is going to make you more sensitive to those things. Because sometimes I'll like work it out in my mind, like, oh, this isn't work. And really like it's definitely, it's definitely trying to serve my work during the work week.   And God is saying, no, like step away from that and allow me to refresh and rejuvenate your spirit so that when you go back to the work, you do so much more powerfully energized, restful, and ready to do that work to the very best of your ability with God's power.   Laura Dugger: (25:07 - 25:36) That reminds me of a previous guest I'll link to. He did two episodes, but Jeff Henderson just said he's a pastor too. And he said, sometimes the most spiritual thing you can do is take a nap.   I would agree on that, which you've kind of been sharing a little glimpses of your family's experience with Sabbath, but let's just zero in on Sabbath and I'll just try and go through a series of questions. But first what's the importance of Sabbath?   Eryn Lynum: (25:37 - 26:55) Well, first God commands it. Like if God commanded it, then surely it's important, but that can also sometimes cause us to get a little legalistic about it. What is it? What isn't it? Well, it is meant to be a gift, meant to be a blessing. It's meant to empower us and what God created us for and calls us to.   And so, keeping that just center, this is meant to be a gift, but we see it all throughout scripture, the importance of rest and rest in God's design. It's celebration. Like it's not idleness. It's not doing nothing. Although sometimes like that's the most beneficial way that we can rest. Like you talked about a nap.   I love a good nap on Sabbath, but also it can be energizing activities, inspiring activities. I also love a good long walk on Sabbath. Sometimes I love cooking with fresh ingredients and working on a meal during Sabbath because I don't get much opportunity to do that during the week. Sometimes I love going out and working in the garden because that's life giving and I don't have time to do that throughout the week. And so, getting back to this concept, this idea of Sabbath and rest are celebratory. Like when we do it well as a family, it feels like a mini vacation every week.   Laura Dugger: (26:56 - 27:15) Ooh, I love that. My husband said that before about date night and I connect with that, that it's a little mini reprieve, a mini vacation each week. But then that leads me to the question because I bet so many people share their Sabbath activities with you. What do families actually do on this day of rest?   Eryn Lynum: (27:16 - 31:46) Yeah, that's a great question. And first I'll say that it should look different from family to family. We are all in unique seasons. We have different stories, different scenarios. Again, if you can't start with the full day, now I strongly believe strive and work toward that full day. That's God's design.   And we've seen the most blessing from that. But if you have to start smaller with a half day with four hours, start there. So, it's going to look different. If you have newborns, like a newborn child, it's going to look different and that's okay. No going into it, that it's going to be messy. Hebrews says strive toward rest, work toward rest. It's so counter-cultural. We have to work toward it. So, just going in, knowing these things is very helpful.   It's also going to grow, adapt, and change throughout the seasons. Our family has seen that. But a typical Sabbath for our family right now is we follow the traditional Friday evening to Saturday evening for the most part. Some people ask me, why not Sunday? Isn't Sunday the Sabbath? Well, for us, Sunday is set aside for church community and fellowship and corporate worship. And that's so life-giving to our souls. But by the time I get home from church and I'm making lunch for the family, like I'm not rested physically. So, we needed a separate day set aside for rest.   And so, Friday afternoon, we start preparing where we're going to band together and just pick up the house, get it ready, wash all the dishes and just start preparing our hearts, our minds, our bodies, our home for rest. And then we start Friday evening with communion as a family, just breaking bread and celebrating what Christ did on our behalf. And again, that, that idea of celebrate, and this marks it as special. Okay. We're heading into Sabbath. Some families will like light a white candle for Sabbath, just really marking it. And then we have, we toast to the week. So, we'll pour sparkling juice and just toast and say, “Hey, what did we see God do this week?” Like going back to that idea of stop and delight, we are setting a hard stop to the week. We are delighting. What did we see God do? What did he help us overcome? What can we thank Him for from this past week? And then we'll do an easy dinner. Think tacos, take and bake pizza spaghetti.   We use paperware, which is a bit controversial since I work as a master naturalist, but it has been an easy button for Sabbath that I'm not worried about like dishes piling up on the counter. And then we'll, we'll wrap it up with a sweet treat like ice cream and then our kids go to bed, or they'll listen to audio books. Audio books have been massive for our Sabbath because they're screen-free because we do put away all screens and work like devices on Sabbath, but they can listen to good books.   And my husband and I, we read, like people ask me, when do you find time to read? You don't find time to read. You have to make time to read. And for us, that's on the Sabbath mostly. And then Saturday we sleep in, we get up pretty early during the week and the kids just know like you don't wake mom and dad on the Sabbath. Like that's their day to sleep in.   Again, if you have a newborn or young children, that's gonna look different and that's okay. But for us, that's the season that we're in and our kids, they'll make themselves first breakfast and then eventually we'll get up and we'll join them for a second breakfast or some Sabbath. I don't want to cook at all. And so, it's just take and forage. And you know, I usually have a grocery delivery the day before or go to the grocery store and make sure we just have a ton of good stuff in the house. So, no one's, you know, everyone has what they need.   Then the rest of the day, it is just a day of delight. Reading books, playing games, being out in creation, visiting with neighbors, having great conversations together. Sabbath is this space where you get to do all those things during the week that you're like, oh, I wish I had time for that and you just don't get to them. Like recently my daughter during the week, she really wanted me, she's seven. She wanted me to sit down and watercolor paint with her, which I love doing, but it was a really busy week. And I just didn't have the space.   And so, I told her like, “Hey, I would love to do that. Can we do that on Sabbath?” And she was so happy with that answer. And come that Sabbath a few days later, she remembered, she came up to me. She's like, mom, it's time to paint. And she got all the supplies, and we went and sat outside at our picnic table and painted for the afternoon.   You know, Sabbath does so much for me as a mom to remove that guilt of the things I don't feel like I have time for because I know, and my kids know, Sabbath is coming and that's our day to be together and do those things.   Laura Dugger: (31:47 - 31:57) Hmm. Okay. That makes me curious. Then to how much of a vote does everyone in the family get for what Sabbath will look like?   Eryn Lynum: (31:57 - 34:02) Oh, that is a great question. No one's ever phrased it to me like that before. I love that. What we found that's been important to keep in mind is that we all individually find different things, restful and inspiring. I'll give you an example. One Sabbath, my husband, especially in the spring, he loves to work in the yard on Sabbath because he spends most of his week. He runs a construction company on the computer or on the phone. And so, in the spring, he wants to be out in the yard and trimming his fruit trees and just working with God's creation. And so, one Sabbath he comes and he has like the clippers in his hand and he's like, “Hey, let's go work on the yard.”   And I was like, that's great. You do that. I'm going to go read my book in the hammock. And I fell asleep for two hours while he worked on the yard. And so, a lot of this is being okay that yes, a lot of it's going to be together. Like I talked about, we did, we do communion together and we do meals together. And a lot of times we'll be out on a hike together. That's a favorite Sabbath activity. But a lot of times we're also doing separate activities.   The kids are enjoying their books or their audio books or their painting or their, uh, visiting the neighbor kids. And my husband and I are reading books on the back deck. And so, it's okay that there's going to be some together time and some separate time, you know, just being flexible with it. Like our first year of Sabbath, we went, we had to go like hardcore. We had to learn to stay. I think about in the book, I talk about the word abide meno in the Greek and it can mean to stay, to dwell, to remain.   So, we've spent our first year of Sabbath, not getting in the car. We stayed home and learned to just be home together. And after that year, we started to miss our time. We live in Colorado, missing our time hiking in the mountains. And so, we changed it. We said, okay, well, toward the end of Sabbath Saturday afternoon, Saturday evening, let's go hike or let's go have a picnic in the wilderness. And just being open to that, that God's going to change you as a family and change you individually. And just growing up in a Sabbath practice together.   Laura Dugger: (34:03 - 34:20) I like the freedom that you're communicating there. And then when you mentioned the neighborhood kids, it makes me curious. Do you encourage community for some of those who recharge with other people? Would you recommend Sabbath thing with others or just keeping it your family?   Eryn Lynum: (34:21 - 36:16) Absolutely. We love inviting others into Sabbath. And it actually started with, we started our Sabbath practice. It was so sweet because God convinced us to do this. And then our first Sabbath was on January 1st. That happened to be the first Saturday that we did it. So, it was like this fresh start. And right around that time, we had moved to a new neighborhood. And our neighbors near us are Messianic Jews.   And they follow Shabbat, the traditional Shabbat. And they invited us into that. It was the sweetest evening, and they have children, young children, like we do. So, like there's chaos and there's mess. And then there's sweet times of singing together and scripture reading. And they follow it much more the traditional method than our family has.   But it was so sweet to be invited into that and to get a picture for how to invite others into this rest. And so, absolutely, we encourage, especially our kids having friends over. And we do usually ask parents, hey, can you drop them off? And then we can bring them back maybe like later that day toward the end of our Sabbath. Or if you want to come pick them up. Because again, we like to just stay home if we can.   But our kids are to the point now too where they can ride their bikes over to friends' houses. And we're fine with that. They might not be home on Sabbath once in a while. It's not a regular thing. But they're getting fed. And we know that the people they're with are people who share our values, people that we do life together.   We love having bonfires in the backyard on Sabbath. Now one thing I have to be careful of is I don't want to invite people over and feel like I need to host or clean up first. And so, for one, we don't have full families over a whole lot on Sabbath because I just don't want any sort of self-induced, self-imposed pressure.   But sometimes it's so much fun to just be like, hey, let's go meet at a park and have a picnic dinner. Or let's have a family over and do a bonfire. Just making sure that you're keeping it really, really simple if you are going to incorporate community.   Laura Dugger: (36:17 - 37:54) Guess what? We are no longer an audio-only podcast. We now have video included as well. If you want to view the conversation each week, make sure you watch our videos. We're on YouTube, and you can access videos or find answers to any of your other questions about the podcast when you visit thesavvysauce.com.   Some of these things, like you said, “They do require forethought where you have the groceries coming or certain things in place. And I think you even refer to it as a sacred striving.” So, it's important for us to learn more about that. And here's a quick story.   I just remember we've moved states quite a few times in marriage. But when I was a young mom, there was a mom in the next season of life, and she had more kids than we did. And we went to church together, and she was just like, “Oh, we learned about Sabbath. That's not a thing for moms with multiples.” And I always wrestled with that, and I love her. She's a wonderful person. Maybe she's even changed her stance on that, so it's not to speak ill of her. But I do think that we can struggle with that because that's not an actual truth. I do think that's a message from the enemy.   So, I guess this is a two-part question. How do we protect ourselves from buying into a storyline that is not true that may hold us back from Sabbath? And then also, what is kind of the both and? It's both restful, and it requires a lot of work up front to make this a reality.   Eryn Lynum: (37:55 - 41:19) It does, and knowing that, that it is going to take work, but God's going to bless it. Think about Isaiah 55:10-11, that says, “Just like the rain and the snow go forth and produce life and bring forth life from the land, so my work goes out and does not return void or empty. It produces that which I sent it out for.”.   That is true for Sabbath and rest because, again, we find it all throughout scripture. So, know that it's going to take hard work, but God will not allow it to return void. He will bless our efforts as we step into His design that He created us for.   I talk about in the book a few ways that you have to prepare mentally, physically, and spiritually. So, mentally, for me, I have to just totally remove anything mentally that's going to distract me from rest. So, I own a business, and so a lot of my work is on the computer and on the phone. I will answer, so this is like Friday, I'll answer any lingering emails, those ones that are going to be on my mind if I don't get to them. And then I put an away message on my email. So, if anyone emails me on our Sabbath, it sends an automatic reply that says, hey, thanks for your message. My family's resting. It has a little blurb in there about Sabbath. I'll get back to you in the new week.   That gives me permission to not even look at my email. In fact, people expect that I'm not looking at my email if I'm keeping my word. And so, this has just freed me up mentally to step away, and then I literally put my laptop in my closet.   With my phone, I set it to a Sabbath mode, and you can create these different focus modes if you have a smartphone, so that I can only receive messages from my mom in case of emergency. And our people, our friends, they all know this now. Like, oh, I'm not going to hear back from Erin because it's Saturday for the most part.   And so, these little things that you might just need to mentally prepare yourself. And then physically, that goes back to preparing our home. So, this is not a deep clean that we do prior to Sabbath. It's just tending to the things that are going to distract me if we don't get to them beforehand. So, again, washing all the dishes and having the kitchen clean, vacuuming. Like, that's like just a hack to make the house feel clean is I feel like it's clean if it's vacuumed.   So, just these little things, and then physically also doing that grocery order. And I have a free Sabbath guide on my website, erinlynum.com/family-sabbath. And it walks you through creating your Sabbath grocery list so that every week you have what you need in the house. These little things that truly make it, Sabbath easier and more successful.   And then preparing spiritually, going into this, like a lot of times I'll know, okay, I'm going to study this on Sabbath. For our first year, I just had like this stack of books on Sabbath that I would work through on our Sabbath. Right now, I am parked in Genesis 1 and have been for weeks. And so, just preparing spiritually, you know, this is a time of communion with our creator, with our heavenly father. And so, just having an idea of, you know, this is how I want to spend time delighting in God on the Sabbath.   That might be a long walk. That might be time in the word or time of worship but making sure that that is a keystone part of your Sabbath practice.   Laura Dugger: (41:20 - 41:45) And, you know, it really is possible. I just think so many of us celebrate holidays and we do the same thing where we plan, prepare, prioritize ahead of time so that we can delight in that day. And what a gift to get to do that weekly. So, with all of these amazing benefits, why do we still resist God's design for rest?   Eryn Lynum: (41:46 - 43:00) Because we live in a fallen world, broken by sin, and the enemy wants to do everything he can to keep us from this. This is God's design and our faith, and our souls and our families flourish in this design. And so, the enemy is going to do whatever he can to keep us from it.   He's going to insert fear. He's going to insert distraction. He's going to insert doubt. You know, when we started this practice coming up to it, I was thinking, there's no way, like how are we going to get everything done in one last day a week, all these doubts. And yet what we found so quickly is that as we took this step of faith, we quickly became so much more productive and effective and creative during the work week, because we were starting from rest and following God's design.   We resist this because it is counter-cultural. Everything in society is set up against us doing this and succeeding in this. So, again, going and knowing that our war is not against flesh and blood. It is against the powers of the spheres, like things unseen. The enemy is against us, but God is on our side. And as we step into his design, he's going to make much of it.   Laura Dugger: (43:01 - 43:12) Okay. So, if we are convinced and we want to give this a try, what is a practical first step to just obeying this and receiving this gift of rest?   Eryn Lynum: (43:13 - 45:23) Yeah, super practical here. Two first steps. The first is to set a day and time. Now you're not committing to this forever. And again, if you, if a big hesitancy here is I can't do a full day. Okay. Work and pray toward that but start smaller. If it's four hours on a Wednesday, guard that time. Ruthlessly guard it. Don't let anything be written on the schedule besides that.   So, set a day in time and then write two lists. This is going back to the idea of stop and delight, right? Your stop list. These are things that send you into hurry and hustle mode, things that are related to normal work, things that feel heavy. Some of them are so important.   Again, our work is important, but this is going to be things like devices, media, regular work, answering emails, phone calls. It might be driving in traffic. It might be spending money. Write down those things that feel heavy. That's your stop list. The things you're not going to entertain on that day or that time.   And then write your delight list. This might be hard at first because what I've found with myself, with many of us is that we forget what we delight in but causes that childlike sense of play and wonder. This is learning to be human again, coming back to those things.   So, it might be playing music or listening to music, working with fresh ingredients, reading a good book, writing by hand, watercolor painting, going for a walk. What we find is that a lot of people who spend time during the week in front of a computer want to be outdoors on the Sabbath, but people who run a landscaping company might want to be inside with a great book. So, just writing down those things that are, again, those things that you think during the week, oh, I really wish I could get to that.   Only we don't. Those are your delight list. So, now you have a day and a time. You know what you're not going to do, what you're setting aside, even physically, that should probably most definitely be your phone. Stick it in a drawer. I have my Sabbath drawer where I put my phone, and then you know what you're going to do and spend that day on.   Laura Dugger: (45:24 - 45:47) That's so good. And for those who have been listening for a while, they could even put their phone in their RO box, and I could link to that episode as well with Joey Odom. That's incredible about where our phone could be in its right place.   But Eryn, are there any other practical benefits that we might be missing out on that you've seen as a result of this Sabbath rest?   Eryn Lynum: (45:48 - 49:44) One of my favorite benefits is how it unlocks our creativity. Whether you work in a career or position that you consider creative or not, God designed all of us to be creative, to produce. And so, what I have found is that my work, my work is very in that creative sphere, writing books, creating podcast lessons for children.   It's very creative work. And I've found that Sabbath is this day where God gives my mind rest. It's so incredible thinking about how he wired our brains to thrive through rest, and science points to that that a restful mind is better at problem-solving, connecting ideas, remembering details.   And so, as my mind is allowed to rest on Sabbath, and I'm out on a walk in nature, or I'm reading a good book, or I'm writing by hand, when it comes time to sit down at the computer Monday morning, I am ready. I am flowing with ideas. They are there.   And I'll give you an example. This one isn't from Sabbath. It's from one of my daily rest rhythms that I call Selah Pause, and that's a walk in the morning. And this might be a little controversial, but this is not an easy stroll. I have my rucking pack on, and I'm trekking up a hill, which is not physically restful, of course, but it's mentally restful for me. I love it.   And so, it was in January, so it's frigid out, and everything's covered in snow, and I'm in all my snow gear, and I'm trudging up this hill. And at the time, I was dealing with a problem in my podcast where it was a good problem. We had spent the month teaching about God's designs in the human body. So, we had taught kids about God's designs in cells and DNA and the heart and the brain, but I didn't want to just let this series end. I wanted to wrap it up in some powerful way, and I didn't know how. So, I could have stayed home that morning and hashed this out and been at the computer, and how should I end this thing?   Instead, I went on this walk, and God just dropped this idea in my mind. And it was this idea. He said, ask the kids how they are wonderfully made. And that was the top. The theme was wonderfully made. And so, I put it out there to my email list. When I got back from that walk, I said, hey, I would love to hear how you kids believe you are wonderfully made by the creator. And I opened up this little voice mailbox on our website, and I didn't know if anyone would respond. And then I'm like, what if they don't? And then I don't know what to do because I said I'm going to do this thing.   I tell you, message after message came in from children from ages. I think it was three or four up to 14 from all over the world. And I was weeping as I edited that episode. I had planned to add something at the beginning and the end to build out this episode. I didn't do that because it was, I believe it's 22 minutes straight of children saying, this is my name.   I'm five years old. I live in England and I'm wonderfully made because God made me to read well or God made me fast. Or one little boy shared, he said, I know I'm wonderfully made because my mama lost a baby before me. And I'm here and I'm wonderfully made. And I'm weeping.   And this idea that God gave me, I would have missed it if I hadn't taken that pause to be out in his creation walking that day. And so, that's a very roundabout way to get back to your question of what are the other benefits? We hear from God when we make time for rest. And if we keep just rushing and hurrying, I'm concerned that we are walking by so many opportunities to hear from his spirit and to let him unlock that potential within us.   Laura Dugger: (49:45 - 50:22) Oh, I love that. And I'm even reminded of one other thing that you write in your book that today, one way we can practically experience his original design of rest is by stepping outside. And you're full of tips and ideas like that, but I so appreciate those stories.   So, you've equipped us with this foundation of rest and ways that we can prepare for it, how we can enjoy and delight in it. And so now, Eryn, how can we reflect well on our rhythms of work and rest?   Eryn Lynum: (50:25 - 53:19) So, much of this is reflection. So, much of this is stopping to consider where God is at work in our lives, where we need to recalibrate, where we need to realign, where we need to step back into his pace because we're trying to run ahead of him. And one way that we can see it, you know, like you might ask the question, am I at rest? Even me sometimes on Sabbath, I'm like, am I doing this right? Like, is this actually restful? Is this what I'm supposed to be doing?   I think we can answer that question by the fruit in our lives, the fruit inside of us that God is producing and the fruit that we are producing. So, one thing I kind of sum up the book on is this question of, are you growing in truth and love? Because the enemy, when he gets us away from God's rest and into hustle, into distraction and hurry, we are not fully experiencing God.   And so, our levels of experiencing his love and offering it to others is going to suffer. Our experience of hearing his truth and living that truth out in our lives is going to suffer. And so, the opposite is true that as we live at rest, this whole concept of abide, that is living at rest, not just these rest practices, but living at rest in God's restful presence, we are going to be producing more love and more truth.   So, that's like a key visual. And then I love on that idea of abide. We spent a whole week on abide in the book and, you know, John chapter 15 being the abide passage. And what we see there is there's these 11 mentions of that word abide. And they all refer to us abiding in Christ, Christ abiding in us, God's word abiding in us. So, all this connectivity between Christ and God and us and his word.   But then it's, I think it's verse 16. There's a different mention of meno, abide. And it says that he wants us to go out and produce fruit that abides. So, this is different. It relates to our fruit and that word abide. Yes, it can mean dwell, remain, stay, but it can also mean continue and endure.   God created us to produce fruit and fruit that endures. Doesn't rot, doesn't fade, but continues into eternity. So, we can look at, okay, am I personally in my spirit? Am I growing in truth and love? Because God's spirit actually has the space to minister to me when I rest. And is that rest directly affecting the fruit of my life?   These are key things that we can look at and ask to see. Are we truly living from God's rest?   Laura Dugger: (53:19 - 53:53) I love questions so much. And that's so good to reflect then on the fruit that's being produced. And a mentor many years ago said, you never reap what you sow in the same season. So, that's a great place to even begin just reflecting. What did we do in the past season and what fruit are we reaping now? And where do we want to go then from here?   And one place we could go from here after this chat is to follow you. And you've mentioned your podcast. Do you want to elaborate on all the places that you're available?   Eryn Lynum: (53:54 - 55:03) Yes, thank you. So, the new book, The Nature of Rest is available wherever you get your books, along with my second book, Rooted in Wonder: Nurturing Your Family's Faith Through God's Creation. And that's all about taking our kids or grandkids, the next generation outside and reconnecting the dots between creation and creator. Really returning nature study and time outdoors to its proper place as theology and the study of God.   So, those are available anywhere, including Amazon or my website, which is my name, erynlynum.com. And then my podcast is Nat Theo, short for Natural Theology. It's nature lessons rooted in the Bible. It's a podcast for kids and families where we dive deep into science and all the design and intelligence we see in creatures and plants. And we tie it all back to biblical truth so that our kids are learning science and theology at the same time.   And that's available on any podcast platform, Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Amazon Music, right on my website, erinlynum.com, as well as YouTube. We actually provide visuals so you can watch what you're learning about as well.   Laura Dugger: (55:04 - 55:22) So, incredible. We will add links to that in the show notes for today's episode. And Eryn, you may already be familiar. We're called The Savvy Sauce because savvy is synonymous with practical knowledge. And so, as my final question for you today, what is your savvy sauce?   Eryn Lynum: (55:24 - 56:34) I love this question. And this is one that actually I was like, oh, I'm not asked this much. I'm going to have to really think deeply on this one.   It's get outside every day. That seems so simple, even though it's not really simple in practicality. But one thing I've learned through rest and through time outdoors is that 10 minutes matters. Like if you think I don't have time for this, but you have a 10 minute slot, go for a walk and see how God just communes with your spirit. Even in the dead of winter, if you live somewhere cold, like if it's safe to do so. For me, I had to buy like the best pair of snow pants I could find because I used to really dislike the winter. And I would just become like really down in those winter months.   And so, God just convinced me, don't go outside every single day if it's for 10 minutes. And then pretty often he just extends that. Like I think I'm going out for 10 minutes. And sure enough, I'm like playing with my kids outside. It's much longer.   But yeah, as best as you can, just prioritize that. If you have to do it first thing in the morning to make sure it happens, go for a walk and watch the sunrise. And God is going to minister to your soul through his creation.   Laura Dugger: (56:35 - 56:54) Amen. Amen. That is so good.   And this conversation has been so rich. Eryn, it is just very clear you have filled up on the Lord Jesus Christ, and you have just poured out goodness and love and truth for all of us, all over all of us today. So, thank you for all that you shared. And thank you for being my guest.   Eryn Lynum: (56:55 - 57:03) Thank you. Thank you so much for that encouragement. That means a whole lot to me. So, thank you. And for the opportunity for a great conversation.   Laura Dugger: (57:03 - 1:03:10) I really enjoyed it.    One more thing before you go, have you heard the term gospel before? It simply means good news. And I want to share the best news with you, but it starts with the bad news.   Every single one of us were born sinners, but Christ desires to rescue us from our sin, which is something we cannot do for ourselves. This means there's absolutely no chance we can make it to heaven on our own. So, for you and for me, it means we deserve death, and we can never pay back the sacrifice we owe to be saved.   We need a savior, but God loved us so much. He made a way for his only son to willingly die in our place as the perfect substitute. This gives us hope of life forever in right relationship with him.   That is good news. Jesus lived the perfect life. We could never live and died in our place for our sin.   This was God's plan to make a way to reconcile with us so that God can look at us and see Jesus. We can be covered and justified through the work Jesus finished. If we choose to receive what he has done for us, Romans 10:9 says, “that if you confess with your mouth, Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved.”   So, you pray with me now. Heavenly father, thank you for sending Jesus to take our place. I pray someone today right now is touched and chooses to turn their life over to you.   Will you clearly guide them and help them take their next step in faith to declare you as Lord of their life? We trust you to work and change lives now for eternity. In Jesus name we pray.   Amen. If you prayed that prayer, you are declaring him for me. So, me for him, you get the opportunity to live your life for him.   And at this podcast, we're called The Savvy Sauce for a reason. We want to give you practical tools to implement the knowledge you have learned. So, you're ready to get started.   First, tell someone, say it out loud, get a Bible. The first day I made this decision, my parents took me to Barnes and Noble and let me choose my own Bible. I selected the Quest NIV Bible and I love it.   You can start by reading the book of John. Also get connected locally, which just means tell someone who's a part of a church in your community that you made a decision to follow Christ. I'm assuming they will be thrilled to talk with you about further steps such as going to church and getting connected to other believers to encourage you.   We want to celebrate with you too. So, feel free to leave a comment for us here. If you did make a decision to follow Christ, we also have show notes included where you can read scripture that describes this process.   And finally, be encouraged. Luke 15:10 says, “in the same way, I tell you, there is rejoicing in the presence of the angels of God over one sinner who repents.” The heavens are praising with you for your decision today.   And if you've already received this good news, I pray you have someone to share it with. You are loved and I look forward to meeting you here next time.

The world is often defined by boundaries—lines on a map, walls of a classroom, or the rigid structures of a corporate office. But for those who choose to step across those lines, the world reveals itself not as a series of borders, but as a vast, living classroom. Joining us today are two extraordinary women who have collectively set foot on all seven continents, explored 88 countries, and crossed off every single one of the 50 U.S. states.   Evelyn Kelly is a true polymath. With a Ph.D. from the University of Florida and a background spanning microbiology, English, and history, she is the author of 22 books, including deep dives into genetics and her beloved Armchair Adventures series.   Natalie Kelly is a seasoned leader and the CEO of a major state organization. With a 35-year career that includes being the youngest female staff director in the Florida Senate and running her own PR and lobbying firm, she knows exactly what it takes to navigate high-stakes environments.   In this special episode, we explore the intersection of two seemingly different worlds: the high-stakes arena of negotiation and the transformative power of global travel.   In this conversation, we'll navigate:   Negotiation or life lessons you can  pick up while traveling. How travelling can help build confidence and negotiation skills in your daily lives. Strategies to build trust and connection. How toreframe travel as a form of lifelong learning and empowerment? Tips or hack you can use when you trave, whether it's for getting upgrades, better deals, unique experiences to enhance the journey? And many more!   Learn more about Evelyn and Natalie:   Website: https://travelersatheart.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/natalie.kelly.5439 LinkeIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/nataliekellytravelersatheart/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/nataliekellytravelersatheart/   Get their book:  Have a Love Affair with Travel: Your Ticket to an Exhilarating Life   If you're looking to up-level your negotiation skills, I have everything from online to group to my signature one-on-one mastermind & VIP experiences available to help you better leverage your innate power to get more of what you want and deserve in life. Check out our website at www.artofFeminineNegotiation.com if that sounds interesting to you.   Get Cindy's book here: Amazon   https://www.amazon.com/Art-Feminine-Negotiation-Boardroom-Bedroom-ebook/dp/B0B8KPCYZP?inf_contact_key=94d07c699eea186d2adfbddfef6fb9e2&inf_contact_key=013613337189d4d12be8d2bca3c26821680f8914173f9191b1c0223e68310bb1 EBook   https://www.amazon.com/Art-Feminine-Negotiation-Boardroom-Bedroom-ebook/dp/B0B8KPCYZP?inf_contact_key=94d07c699eea186d2adfbddfef6fb9e2&inf_contact_key=013613337189d4d12be8d2bca3c26821680f8914173f9191b1c0223e68310bb1 Barnes and Noble   https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/the-art-of-feminine-negotiation-cindy-watson/1141499614?ean=9781631959776 CONNECT WITH CINDY: Website: www.womenonpurpose.ca Website: www.practicingwithpurpose.org Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/womenonpurposecommunity/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/womenonpurposecoaching/ LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/thecindywatson Show: https://www.womenonpurpose.ca/media/podcast-2/ X(Twitter):  https://twitter.com/womenonpurpose1 YouTube:https://www.youtube.com/@hersuasion Email: cindy@womenonpurpose.ca  

Want the Full Episode? Upgrade to the Premium Podcast Experience - https://rachelhollis.supercast.comDive even Deeper in the Coaching Community - Rachel Hollis CoachingCheck out Upcoming Live Events!!In today's episode, Rachel addresses the common struggle of losing momentum with new goals shortly after setting them, especially at the start of a new year. Instead of focusing solely on the goal, she emphasize the importance of building sustainable systems that can support achieving these goals. Let's figure our your system!Get your copy of Rachel's New Book Here: Audible, Amazon, Barnes & Noble, Books-A-Millon, Bookshop.org, or wherever books are sold!00:00 The Excitement and Disappointment of New Year Goals00:39 The Importance of Systems Over Goals01:57 Defining Your 2026 Vision03:32 Building Effective Systems for Success04:41 Recap and Setting Up for February08:52 Personal Health Journey and System Failures14:22 Experimentation and Perfectionism in Systems15:20 Creating Your Personalized System Framework21:18 Exclusive Content and CommunitySign up for Rachel's weekly email: https://msrachelhollis.com/insider/Call the podcast hotline and leave a voicemail! Call (737) 400-4626Watch the podcast on YouTube: http://youtube.com/@MsRachelHollisFollow along on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/MsRachelHollisTo learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Upgrade to the Premium Podcast Experience - https://rachelhollis.supercast.comDive even Deeper in the Coaching Community - Rachel Hollis CoachingCheck out Upcoming Live Events!!In this episode of the Rachel Hollis podcast, Rachel dives into listener questions about challenging relationships and friendships.Get your copy of Rachel's New Book Here: Audible, Amazon, Barnes & Noble, Books-A-Millon, Bookshop.org, or wherever books are sold!00:00 Introduction and Initial Thoughts01:02 Welcome to Ask Rach02:54 Advice on Unhealthy Relationships09:08 Dealing with Friendship Issues19:01 Balancing Motherhood and Self-Care29:12 Final Thoughts and FarewellSign up for Rachel's weekly email: https://msrachelhollis.com/insider/Call the podcast hotline and leave a voicemail! Call (737) 400-4626Watch the podcast on YouTube: http://youtube.com/@MsRachelHollisFollow along on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/MsRachelHollisTo learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Jeffrey Deskovic's life changed forever when he was convicted of a murder he did not commit at just 17 years old. He maintained his innocence for the next 16 years and then, with the help of the Innocence Project, the real person responsible was finally caught and Jeff was released from prison. Now you may be asking yourself, 'Hey, how is this a GOOD story?' The answer is found in what Jeff did after this all happened: He went to law school, became an attorney and founded the Deskovic Foundation, a non-profit organization dedicated to the exoneration of the wrongfully convicted, their recovery, and reform of the system. This is one person's journey from the darkest of places to finding and creating his own light and we gotta tell ya, it doesn't get much more inspiring than this. Today's episode is Part 1 of 2. ______________________ Steve's third book in his cozy mystery series, THE DOG WALKING DETECTIVES is finally here: SEASON'S SLAYINGS! Get your copy on Amazon: https://bit.ly/3WYTPiR or Barnes & Noble: https://bit.ly/4hOjILR Grab the first two: Book 1: DROWN TOWN Amazon: https://amzn.to/478W8mp Barnes & Noble: https://bit.ly/3Mv7cCk & Book 2: MURDER UNMASKED Amazon: https://shorturl.at/fDR47 Barnes & Noble: https://shorturl.at/3ccTy

The key to pursuing happiness is living an intentional life. What do I want to achieve? What do I oppose?Steve is an adjunct professor at Emory University and the Founding Director of the Alabama Civil Liberties Union. His new memoir, out today, is What's In a Family Name: A Southern Family History Becomes a Gothic Mystery. Here's the description:When Steve Suitts undertakes a family research project he uncovers a real-life, true crime, southern Gothic mystery. Ambition, sex, lies, and betrayal. And it all takes place in the Free State of Winston in north Alabama.And here is the book trailer I put together for Steve:You can buy the book here at Bookshop.org and here on Amazon. Steve's website is here.In this conversation Steve and I talk:* The moment Steve realized he had a book* Giving a speech opposing the Ku Klux Klan as a high school student* Reclaiming history* The story of James Monroe Blackwell, Steve's great-great-grandfather, who opposed the Confederacy during the Civil War* His research and writing processHere is an AI generated transcript. Don't come for me.Here is the cleaned and corrected transcript. I have fixed the formatting, corrected the phonetic misinterpretations (like “Free State” instead of “three state” and “progeny” instead of “GY”), and smoothed out the stuttering for readability.Transcript: Interview with Steve SuittsBEN: So Steve, your memoir, What's in a Family Name? A Southern Family History Becomes a Gothic Mystery, comes out today, Tuesday, January 27th. How are you feeling?STEVE: I'm feeling like someone who's waiting to hear what their neighbor's baby is gonna be called.BEN: At what point did you realize this story would make a good book?STEVE: I think the inkling of it was when I discovered that not only was my grandmother's version of my family history on my father's side a fiction, but that it didn't even begin to tell the story. And that point was when I discovered that the person I thought was my grandfather could not biologically be my grandfather, since my father was born at least a year and a half after his death.BEN: The evidence strongly suggests your biological grandfather was actually B.H. Drake, a prominent, wealthy merchant in Winston County. That's right. Why do you think the Drake family and the community worked so hard to erase Anna, your grandmother, and her son, your father, from the official record after B.H. married Anna?STEVE: This is all speculation, but I think there were probably two reasons. The first was simply a matter of embarrassment. Here was a man who was a representative of the local Baptist church at the State Baptist Convention. He gave the land on which the local Baptist church was built. His family was very deeply involved in the Baptist Church, and I think the evidence is that he probably began his affair with my grandmother before he was actually divorced from his first wife. So I think there was a real embarrassment about that in a small-town community.The second is, of course, that he died, and as a wealthy man. By law, she should have been one of the heirs of his estate, because at the time of his death, all evidence points to the fact that they were still married—although they may have, by that time, returned to his first wife's estate. So I think that there was this financial interest, that they would want to keep it quiet.I don't think there was a great deal of complicity on the part of the broader community, but it was just something that happened. And in the community, I think like most small towns, these things did happen and most small towns knew about it, but simply let it play out on its own terms.BEN: You devote part of the book to your great-great-grandfather, James Monroe Blackwell, who was a “scalawag,” or Southerner loyal to the Union. You mentioned that he was threatened with hanging for supporting Lincoln. He named his son after President Lincoln, and this is during the time of the Civil War. Why does his story resonate so much with you?STEVE: When I was in high school in Florence, Alabama, on the Tennessee River, I was a member of the student council, got elected, and I was asked at various times to give speeches at assemblies of the school. One of the speeches I gave was during 1964 or ‘65, and it was essentially an attack on the Klan—the Ku Klux Klan.I don't remember the entire speech, but I do remember saying that the Klan had to understand that Halloween came only once a year, and even then, when you wore a mask, you were not allowed to harm people anonymously. And that the Klan was a group who masqueraded without any courage of showing themselves to the public.I also remember that my teachers on that day kept me late at school. For some reason I did not understand until later in life, one of them drove me home that day rather than letting me walk by myself.So I came to those views for a variety of reasons. But when I discovered that I had an ancestor who not only supported the Union during the war over slavery, but who also supported the reconstruction of the South on the terms that the Congress established in the aftermath of the Civil War... I realized that I wasn't the first in my family to believe in the kind of equal treatment under the law that I was espousing as a high school student.And later, going on to work with the American Civil Liberties Union affiliate in Alabama—where we did more litigation relating to equal treatment under the law as we did the First Amendment—it was a moment in which I realized that whatever bloodlines do in this world for families, I wasn't the first. And Lord have mercy, I hope I'm not the last.BEN: When you were young, did you hear stories about James Monroe Blackwell, or did you only discover this history later?STEVE: I discovered this history later. No one talked about it. My great uncle—my grandmother's brother—Uncle Wesley, used to talk about why we were Republicans in the family, but he never talked about James Monroe Blackwell. No one did. Not even my grandmother, who I think probably had mixed up fact and fiction so much by the time she told me the story about our family history that she might have put him on the wrong side of the Civil War, after all.BEN: At the end of the book, you write about the idea of reclaiming history—both with Blackwell and with your grandmother and the Drake family, your great-grandmother, and the decisions that she made to protect her family. Can you talk about that motivation of reclaiming history and what that means to you?STEVE: Yeah. I think we all are trying to find our place in the world, but the Faulkner concept that the past is not really the past essentially means that, in finding our place in the world, we also have to know who we were in our past, where our family fit in, where we came from. It's a very Southern notion, but I think it's a universal one as well.Reclaiming the history, I think, means that we're trying to understand where we came from and, by that measure, where we're going in our lives. One of the things the book jacket says is that this is a story that no family wanted to remember, and a family too proud of its history would always want to forget.And I think for me, reclaiming history is a matter of not trying to reconstruct it or trying to hide it. It's trying to simply say: this is where my family has been, this is who we have been. And it doesn't predict who I'm going to be and what I'm going to be, but it gives me a way in which to frame who I am and how I'm gonna go forward.And for those who read the book, you won't be surprised to realize that I have tried very hard in my life to not be the person my father was. I've made a very deliberate and very conscientious effort. Whether I've succeeded or not, only my sons and descendants will be able to say, but that's part of reclaiming your history. Look at the word: his-story. That's what history is. And part of that history is you at that moment, and you can either continue that history or you can break with it.BEN: But I'll note... how much do you think people are shaped by their environment, by their family history? And I ask because I think you're an example of someone who grew up in a conservative political environment. Like you said, one of the teachers had to drive you home after giving your Ku Klux Klan Halloween speech. Personally, as you write about in the introduction, your father was at best difficult—I think accurately described as abusive. And yet you... I don't know if “rejected” is the right word, but you are a different person than those two different environments would most likely produce.STEVE: I think the key to the pursuit of happiness—as our Declaration of Independence says—in my judgment, is enabled only by having an intentional life. A life in which you say: Why am I here? What do I want to achieve? What do I want to oppose? What do I want to support? Simply have a sense of intent about how you frame your life.Now, obviously, everybody knows that we have to earn a living. Sometimes the jobs we get aren't always the jobs we may have wanted earlier in life. It may be difficult, may have other problems. But generally, it is one where you have to simply live an intentional life, trying to have goals—whether the goals drive out of your reading of the Bible, or whether they're from great philosophers, or simply out of the sense of what you think is right and wrong.And I think the discussion about nurture and nature is one that will continue to be unresolved. In that competition between which is more important, your lineage or your environment, there is, I think, something which some religious teachings call free will. Perhaps it's not as free as some might think, but you have choices to make.When I was reading the first Harry Potter books with my family—the boys were small and they were devouring those books—I was reading along. And the school superintendent, Dumbledore, makes a statement to Harry Potter in which he says, essentially: “Harry, we are the choices we make.” And at that point I said out loud, “Yeah!” And of course, the boys thought I was talking about who had won the Quidditch match in the book.But therein lies, I think, my sense of what it's all about. You make choices. And while those choices may inhibit others and they may open up others, you are those choices, and you need to make them with an intent of what you want your life to be. So that's my view.BEN: What was the process of writing this book like?STEVE: I did most of the research before I even began putting anything down on paper. That's not usually the way I write books. I usually have a lot of research already done, but you still have to go back in and answer questions as the writing process occurs. In this case, all of the research was virtually done before I started writing. So it really was a more reflective process than a fact-finding process for me.I have a friend, Jack Drake, who's a great civil rights lawyer and now retired, who has a memoir coming out that's gonna be a very important one about somebody who grew up as a white Southern boy dealing with the issues of race in the Deep South. Jack says he thinks the best way to figure something out is to write about it. And there's a lot of truth in that, if you're writing honestly.And I think in this case, the writing process finally brought home both the sense of villainy that's in the story I tell, and also some sense of pride in the honesty and the good character of people who are also members of my family, whose surname I carry and whose progeny I am.BEN: So the book comes out today. Where can people buy it and where can people find more information about you?STEVE: The book is available at any of the major online booksellers. You can go to Bookshop, which is an online store for independent bookstores, but Amazon, Barnes and Noble, Books-A-Million, or whatever online bookseller is out there.It hopefully is at a price that you can afford. It's a book that I think everyone, hopefully, will be able to read and prompt their own interest in their own family history.BEN: And if people want to keep up with you and learn more about you, where can they find you?STEVE: I now have a website and it is aptly called SteveSuitts.com. That's S-T-E-V-E-S-U-I-T-T-S dot com.BEN: The book is What's in a Family Name? A Southern Family History Becomes a Gothic Mystery. Comes out today, available everywhere. That's a fantastic book. I encourage you to get it and urge you to visit Steve's website and keep up with what he's doing. Including... Steve, are you working on another book?STEVE: I am. Actually, the next book is also going to be set in Winston County, Alabama—the Free State. And it's going to be about the history of the county, race relations, and centered especially on a single Black school that operated for more than 40 years in Haleyville in a one-room church chapel. I look forward to finishing it and then moving on to the second volume of my trilogy of Justice Hugo Black of Alabama. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit benbo.substack.com

Upgrade to the Premium Podcast Experience - https://rachelhollis.supercast.comDive even Deeper in the Coaching Community - Rachel Hollis CoachingCheck out Upcoming Live Events!!In this episode, Rachel Hollis addresses the frustration of working hard towards goals without making significant progress. She identifies common pitfalls like self-sabotage disguised as productive activity, goal avoidance, and the allure of potential over commitment.Get your copy of Rachel's New Book Here: Audible, Amazon, Barnes & Noble, Books-A-Millon, Bookshop.org, or wherever books are sold!00:26 Meet Rachel Hollis: Your Guide to Real Life01:06 Understanding High Achievers and Their Struggles01:39 The Origin of Today's Episode02:38 The Sneaky Trap of Goal Avoidance05:13 Deferred Courage Syndrome: A Common Pitfall11:07 The Illusion of Preparation13:38 Bargaining with Fear: A Dangerous Game14:35 Motherhood and Personal Goals: Finding Balance19:17 Addicted to Potential: The Allure of 'Someday'23:47 The Fear of Failure: Why It Holds You Back25:52 Building a Supportive Community27:30 Conclusion: Aligning Actions with GoalsSign up for Rachel's weekly email: https://msrachelhollis.com/insider/Call the podcast hotline and leave a voicemail! Call (737) 400-4626Watch the podcast on YouTube: http://youtube.com/@MsRachelHollisFollow along on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/MsRachelHollisTo learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Special Patreon Release: Better Together with Jon and Jolene Rocke   "What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder." Mark 10:9 (KJV)   *Transcription Below*   Questions and Topics We Discuss: What are you so thankful you did in every season of marriage, from newlyweds to empty nesters that you see the pay off now in the present? How has grace and forgiveness benefited your relationship? What advice do you have for all of us married couples as we seek to grow as one, rather than grow parallel or even grow apart from one another?   Jon and Jolene Rocke are my local friends and my guests for today. They work side by side at Peoria Rescue ministries, and they have so many lovely gifts of leadership and hospitality and teaching, but the topic we are going to focus on today is marriage. From the first time we met, Mark and I adored them and appreciated their sweet bond with one another, and I'm so thrilled to introduce you to them today. Here's our chat:   Jon and Jolene both grew up in Christian homes and accepted Jesus as their Savior and Lord at the age of 15.  Jon is from Morton and Jolene from Elgin, IL. They met on a bus ride to a Youth Gathering in Minnesota.  They sat together and talked the whole way home about life, the Bible and God.  Jon played his guitar and sang John Denver songs and their match was made with “Sunshine on my Shoulders”.   They married at the age of 18 and had their first child, Janelle, at 19.  They left for Grace college in Winona Lake, Indiana with an 18 month old toddler in tow and had another baby girl born while in college named Jaime.  At graduation in 1984, they were accepted to Trinity Seminary to follow Jon's desire to be a Professor of Theology, but became pregnant with their son, Jordan, which changed every plan and sent them back home to build up their finances.   They came back to Morton and worked in the Family Business and felt called to stay.  They raised their 3 children in Morton working in the business until God loosened their tent pegs and called them to Peoria Rescue Ministries in 2017. Jon is the Executive Director and Jolene is the Ministry Ambassador.  They are thankful to be working side-by-side in this new season of their marriage.   Jon and Jolene will celebrate their 44th wedding anniversary and have 3 married children and have 10 grandchildren. Their son Jordan and his wife Jessica live in Sandpoint, Idaho with their 3 Kids.  Their daughter Janelle and husband Ryan live in Kennesaw, Georgia with their 3 children.  And their daughter Jaime and her husband Jonathan live here in Morton with their 4 children.   Related Episodes from The Savvy Sauce: 5 Love Languages with Dr. Gary Chapman Traveling with Your Family with Katie Mueller   At The Savvy Sauce, we will only recommend resources we believe in! We also want you to be aware: We are a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for us to earn fees by linking to Amazon.com and affiliated sites.   Five Love Languages The 5 Love Languages of Teenagers A Teen's Guide to the 5 Love Languages   Thank You to Our Sponsors: Chick-fil-A East Peoria and The Savvy Sauce Charities (and donate online here)   Connect with The Savvy Sauce on Facebook, Instagram or Our Website.   Please help us out by sharing this episode with a friend, leaving a 5-star rating and review, and subscribing to this podcast!   Gospel Scripture: (all NIV) Romans 3:23 “for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God,”   Romans 3:24 “and are justified freely by his grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus.”   Romans 3:25 (a) “God presented him as a sacrifice of atonement, through faith in his blood.”   Hebrews 9:22 (b) “without the shedding of blood there is no forgiveness.”   Romans 5:8 “But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.”   Romans 5:11 “Not only is this so, but we also rejoice in God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have now received reconciliation.”   John 3:16 “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.”   Romans 10:9 “That if you confess with your mouth, “Jesus is Lord,” and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved.”   Luke 15:10 says “In the same way, I tell you, there is rejoicing in the presence of the angels of God over one sinner who repents.”   Romans 8:1 “Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus”   Ephesians 1:13–14 “And you also were included in Christ when you heard the word of truth, the gospel of your salvation. Having believed, you were marked in him with a seal, the promised Holy Spirit, who is a deposit guaranteeing our inheritance until the redemption of those who are God's possession- to the praise of his glory.”   Ephesians 1:15–23 “For this reason, ever since I heard about your faith in the Lord Jesus and your love for all the saints, I have not stopped giving thanks for you, remembering you in my prayers. I keep asking that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the glorious Father, may give you the spirit of wisdom and revelation, so that you may know him better. I pray also that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you, the riches of his glorious inheritance in the saints, and his incomparably great power for us who believe. That power is like the working of his mighty strength, which he exerted in Christ when he raised him from the dead and seated him at his right hand in the heavenly realms, far above all rule and authority, power and dominion, and every title that can be given, not only in the present age but also in the one to come. And God placed all things under his feet and appointed him to be head over everything for the church, which is his body, the fullness of him who fills everything in every way.”   Ephesians 2:8–10 “For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith – and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God – not by works, so that no one can boast. For we are God‘s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.“   Ephesians 2:13 “But now in Christ Jesus you who once were far away have been brought near through the blood of Christ.“   Philippians 1:6 “being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.”   *Transcription*   Music: (0:00 – 0:09)   Laura Dugger: (0:10 - 2:05) Welcome to The Savvy Sauce, where we have practical chats for intentional living. I'm your host, Laura Dugger, and I'm so glad you're here. I want to say a huge thank you to today's sponsors for this episode, Chick-fil-A East Peoria and Savvy Sauce Charities.   Are you interested in a free college education for you or someone you know? Stay tuned for details coming later in this episode from today's sponsor, Chick-fil-A East Peoria. You can also visit their website today at https://www.chick-fil-a.com/locations/il/east-peoria.   If you've been with us long, you know this podcast is only one piece of our nonprofit, which is the Savvy Sauce Charities. Don't miss out on our other resources. We have questions and content to inspire you to have your own practical chats for intentional living.   And I also hope you don't miss out on the opportunity to financially support us through your tax-deductible donations. All this information can be found on our recently updated website, thesavvysauce.com.   Jon and Jolene Rocke are my local friends and my guests for today. They work side by side at Peoria Rescue Ministries, and they have so many lovely gifts of leadership and hospitality and teaching. But the topic we're going to focus on today is marriage. From the first time we met, Mark and I adored them so much and really appreciated their sweet bond with one another. And I'm so thrilled to get to introduce you to them today.   Here's our chat. Welcome to The Savvy Sauce, Jon and Jolene.   Jon Rocke: (2:05 - 2:06) We're so happy to be here, Laura. Thanks so much for having us.   Laura Dugger: (2:07 - 2:43) Well, it's truly my pleasure. And will the two of you just start by giving us a little background on how you came to know Christ as your personal Lord and Savior?   Jolene Rocke: (2:07 - 2:43) Yeah, I grew up in the Chicago area in a suburb and in a Christian home. So, I was very thankful to know about God. And I came to know Him as my personal Savior at 15. And so, then I really had a complete change. And from then on, I have just followed Him as close as I can. So very thankful for Jesus.   Jon Rocke: (2:44 - 2:59) Yeah, and I was actually 15 as well. Became overwhelmed with my sin at 15 and knew that I did not know Christ. And so, since then, a very imperfect following, but glad to be part of the family.   Laura Dugger: (3:00 - 3:15) Well, and that's awesome that both of you were 15 and never knew that piece of your story. But I'm assuming you were living in different places. So then how did the two of you meet and fall in love?   Jolene Rocke: (3:15 - 4:40) That is such a funny story. Because I, along with a friend of mine from Elgin, jumped on a Morton bus going to Morris, Minnesota. And they picked us up in Rockford. And we got on the bus, went to the same youth gathering for our church denomination. And on the way home from that weekend, we sat on the bus the whole way home and talked.   And Jon had what was so interesting to me, a study Bible. And I had never seen a study Bible in my life. And so, he showed me what an open Bible was with notes at the bottom. And because I came to Christ at 15 and started Bible study on my own with just a spiral notebook, a pen, and my Bible, I was fascinated by this Bible.   And I heard from Morton girls that he carried his Bible everywhere. So, he was kind of different than the rest of the guys. And I told them that's the kind of guy I was looking for. And then to top it all off, he had a guitar. And he sang John Denver songs to me. So, Sunshine on My Shoulders, I think, really made me happy.   Laura Dugger: (4:40 - 4:45) Just knowing your family music is such a big part of worship. Yeah. That's part of what wooed you, too.   Jon Rocke: (4:40 - 5:35) Yeah. Part of the crazy story is that it's a long trip. It's like a 12-hour trip. And so, we left Morton at like 5 in the morning. And so, I'm sleeping on the floor. And we picked these girls up. And I wake up, and I'm like, “Oh, an angel just got on the bus.” That's what I thought. And she was like, she didn't really have anything to do with me the whole weekend till the way home.   But we have a lot of fun with that story. And so that was the beginning. I think I sent flowers the next day. And we began, actually, a very long-distance, over-the-phone relationship, getting to know each other. And we actually went through, I think, the Book of Romans together over the course of, I guess, a year. And then got married. And we were pretty young.   Jolene Rocke: (5:36 - 6:47) Yeah. We met when Jon was just 16. And then two weeks after his 18th birthday, we got married. And I'm a year older. So, it was very young. But we are so thankful because we're going to celebrate 44 years of marriage here.   So, God knit us together, I think, through the fact that we were both really pursuing the Lord individually. And then we were so happy to find somebody like that. I thought I was headed to be a missionary in Africa at the time I met him. And he was, like, searching, too. But both all out pursuit of Christ. And so, I think that's what knit our hearts together. And it didn't hurt that he sent flowers the next day.   Laura Dugger: (6:47 - 7:15) It was a wise move. But I love it because the two of you have really grown up together. Totally. You've been meeting as teens. When you reflect back, what are you so thankful that you did in every season of marriage, from newlyweds to now empty nesters, that you're getting to see the payoff now in the present?   Jon Rocke: (6:49 - 8:10) Yeah, I think sometimes you are intentional. And we've tried to be intentional. But I think sometimes God brings circumstances into your life that sort of force something. So not only were we young when we got married, but nine months after we got married, yeah, we had Janelle, our oldest daughter.   And so, we had to realize we still needed time together. And we had a little baby. It began, I think, an intentional course for us to carve out time. So, you know, we put our kids to bed early. It was a big deal for us as parents that we had our time after they went to bed because we didn't get a whole lot of time.   And other little silly things, the kids didn't get to sit in between us at church. That was the rule. You can sit on either side of mom and dad, but you can't sit in between us. And so that was just, you know, again, a little thing that we did. And some things we had to learn. I'm more of a night person. Jolene's more of a morning person. Part of that, we had to learn at one point, you know, let's make sure we prioritize going to bed together. Just so, again, we had that time. So, there's been all sorts of different steps along the way that we've tried to prioritize each other.   Jolene Rocke: (8:10 - 9:01) So the two words that come to my mind with regard to that are compromise. You're two different people, and you're suddenly thrust together into a home situation. Well, that took compromise on both of our parts. So that's kind of sacrifice, too. That means he doesn't get to stay up until midnight if we want to go to bed together, and I'm going to have to push myself to stay up later just so that we can make a common bedtime.   So, compromise, and then I think the other major thing to me would be communication, because we didn't have a relationship before marriage where we were in the same town and could see each other all the time or go on dates. We didn't have that. So, we had letter writing. This is 43 years ago. So, we had letter writing daily.   Jon Rocke: (9:02 - 9:04) Some of us were daily. He was daily.   Jolene Rocke: (9:05 - 9:11) I wasn't quite as good at letter writing every day, but I was in college by now.   Jon Rocke: (9:11 - 9:13) You were still in high school. Now we know.   Jolene Rocke: (9:14 - 10:15) But I think the communication factor, that actually helped us because, yes, I realize face-to-face dating is a great thing, but to not be able to do that and have nothing but be able to write your day out, what happened during your day, you're learning to tell the other person what happened in your day, how you felt about that, what your dreams, your goals are. So, it started, to me and us, I think a great foundation of communication.   Laura Dugger: (10:15 - 10:30) And is it Song of Songs, I believe, 5:16, where part of it says, “This is my lover, this is my friend,” and that's what I'm hearing, is that you were really deepening your friendship in those early years and that from witnessing your lives, it seems that has only continued.   Jolene Rocke: (10:30 - 10:35) Yeah, exactly. We are so thankful. It's a very different story than most people, but we're so thankful.   Jon Rocke: (10:16 - 10:39) I think also, for us, it was Genesis 2 in the sense that you need to leave everything else and cleave together. We were young. It's hard to believe. When we look back, we think about our kids and our grandkids and would we want that for them, and yet I don't think we'd trade it for the world.   Laura Dugger: (10:40 - 10:52) I love that. And what encouragement do you have for others then who are also wanting to build a foundation of remaining connected and intimate in all the aspects of their own marriage?   Jon Rocke: (10:53 - 12:07) That's one of those things about being intentional. Matthew 19:6, where Christ repeats that adage from Genesis 2, that God created them male and female, they need to leave mother and father and cleave together, but then he adds this, “and no one should tear that apart.” And we often think about that, I think, as other people tearing that apart, and that's true.   But the same goes, we can tear ourselves apart if we're not going to make sure everything else, all other distractions, because they're going to continually come, right? And again, we had kids so early that I think we knew we had to carve that time out, because if we wouldn't have, I'm not sure how that would have worked. We would have been so consumed early. But career, we've just known that we've had to say, if we don't make sure that we're the priority, it's so easy to get lost in all the other things of life that are not bad. Kids are not bad, they're great. And your careers and your work, that's all good. But it can be the enemy of great in a marriage.   Jolene Rocke: (12:07 - 12:32) Yeah, we talked about the fact that this is how we started all those years ago. But a pursuit of God individually actually enhances a pursuit of God together. I'm still in the Word individually. Jon's still in the Word individually. But we also then read and pray together every night. So just this pursuit of God.   Jon Rocke: (12:32 - 13:06) But that wasn't something we did from day one either. I mean, that was a learned scenario where one time we were just kind of convicted of the fact that together we're not taking time to pray and read together. And so, then we just made that part of routine at night. So then again, that made us say we're going to go to bed together. Because if we didn't, then we didn't have that time. That opportunity to pray together and read together has just become a connection point that we wouldn't want to trade.   Laura Dugger: (13:07 - 13:55) I think that's encouraging in so many ways because you've grown into this. And I think for anyone just starting out, it's so helpful to see you didn't let excuses get in the way. It reminds me of a supervisor in college who said, “If you want something done, give it to a busy person.” And I think in a unique way with you two being launched into parenthood nine months after you were married, you didn't have the luxury of being frivolous with your time. And you chose intentionality. And it seems like God really has blessed that and honored it.   Jolene Rocke: (13:55 - 14:05) Yeah and continued it to this day. You're very right. We continue to be busy. And that's still the struggle to combat that with intentional time together. So definitely.   Jon Rocke: (13:55 - 14:31) You talk about seasons in our lives. So, I had to have a hip replacement. So, from like 23 till I had that at 50, I couldn't take long walks. But now we get to walk together, which is a huge privilege. And so, I always think about it. I'm not into exercise to exercise, but I'm into being together. And exercise is a thing we can do together. The other thing we did in our, I guess it was on our 25th. We got a tandem bike. And we love doing our tandem bike.   Jolene Rocke: (14:31 - 16:21) But he wanted a tandem bike right when we got married. And I kept saying, no, I didn't really want to sit on the back and have no control. And not be able to see when I thought I should break or when I wanted to turn.   So, this is something that I often encourage women that are moving into the emptiness season of life. I was driving to church alone. And the Lord really impressed on me that the extreme lavish amount of love that as a homemaker I gave to my children who were now gone, I needed to transfer that to my husband.   I've always loved Jon first and best. But I needed to take even the time commitment. What could I do to show Jon I loved him lavishly the way I tried to my children? So that was a time thing for me. And it was like get a tandem bike. So, I was willing then to get the tandem and sit in the back. And you really do; you're called the stoker. You really do work in the back. You don't just sit there. You work. But I no longer had the control of that. And I am learning to see butterflies land on corn stalks. And I actually love our tandem bike. But God had to grow me. And that was part of my several gifts to him in emptiness period that has helped us keep a strong marriage, I think.   Laura Dugger: (16:21 - 16:30) And isn't that interesting how there's a gift in it for you? Like you offer this sacrifice and yet he's teaching you new things.   Jon Rocke: (16:21 - 16:22) I love it, yeah.   Laura Dugger: (16:23 - 16:45) What would you two say is the biggest personality difference that you've recognized in your own marriage?   Jolene Rocke: (16:45 - 17:22) We just had a personality test yesterday. We have an executive team leadership at Peoria Rescue Ministries, and we had to do personality tests again. And that always is quite glaring to see how different we are. So, we're on two ends of the spectrum. But we can encourage any marriage that that can work and actually maybe be in your favor as long as you work hard at it. So, it just takes work and communication to say, you're very logical thinking, I'm very emotional, so how do we come together then in situations where I'm flustered and he's calm because he at times looks as if you don't care.   Jon Rocke: (17:22 - 17:53) Right, yeah, it can be that. You're highly relational. I'm definitely more process. And I think you're going to learn quickly, especially if you have kids, that all your kids are going to have different personalities. That's the weirdest thing, right? They all grew up in the same home and they're all just completely different. And so being able to help them understand kind of a little bit who they are and how that works has been a good thing that we're not the same.   Jolene Rocke: (17:53 - 20:01) God didn't make one good and one bad. He made all of us different, all in His image, to His glory. We all bring value to the family, and we both bring value to one another as helpmates because I'm able to sharpen Jon in areas that are blind spots for him. He's able to totally sharpen me and calm me in blind spots that are mine. So, I think in a marriage, it's just actually, it's been helpful. Differences are good.   Laura Dugger: (20:01 - 20:25) Oh, I love that. Differences are good. It sounds like God sanctified even your views of that. And so, getting really practical, when was a time when your differences were working against each other or caused conflict? And then how, through maturing and more time together, how do you celebrate and even lean into and appreciate those differences?   Jolene Rocke: (20:25 - 21:00) Well, one thing for sure is we had what we call our valley, where we learned that Psalm 23 wasn't just a funeral psalm, but it's a life psalm, and it's a way of life psalm. So, at that time, I had three family members pass away, and Jon had his family business go down. So, we watched our personalities within that in handling loss and grief. So, here's the optimist really down, and here's realist trying to be cheerleader and be up.   And so actually God did it, and we know without a doubt that God can work beyond personalities and bring you to a point where you can actually support one another well. But there again, it's got to be intentional. It's got to be me saying, we need to sit down now and have a meeting, talk about how you're feeling, whether you want to talk about feelings or not, because I need to know where you're at so that I can help you best.   Jon Rocke: (20:01 - 21:20) Yeah, and on a practical level during that time, I found myself not communicating some of what I thought was either scary or just the long drag of it. And so that was a potential way for us to disconnect because all of this is swirling from at least our livelihood standpoint, swirling in my head, and I'm not going to want to share that. And yet we realized we had to, but then those are not always easy things because Jolene, like most ladies, likes security as an important thing, right? Of just knowing what's going to happen.   In the end, it did make us really, again, Joe mentioned Psalm 23, and if he is our shepherd, what else could we want? We both had to end up clinging to that because our security was gone. Part of our sense of who we were, and particularly me in a family business for three generations, was gone. And so, we certainly had to make sure that our tendencies, like in communication, those kinds of things, we had to work through those during that time.   Laura Dugger: (21:21 - 21:30) Thank you for sharing that. I think that's very relatable to hear about the ups and the downs. And so, do you have any specific stories of a time when you were both in your strengths, and even though they were very different, they worked well together?   Jolene Rocke: (21:30 - 23:12) Yeah, I think that it's the learning what your strengths are that you may not know that God gives you at the time, and that's his grace. So, at the time, for all those years previous to the valley, Jon was the one that pushed me to communicate, and shutting down was not an option, which is what I wanted to do. So, I'd rather just not talk about it and go to bed. And he would push, push, push me to keep communicating, and that we would work through everything before the sun went down, as the Bible says.   Well, in the valley, it was Jon that was shutting down. And suddenly, you know, I had to be the one to push communication. So, this is something I heard on a sermon. A personality is not an excuse for sin. So that just means that I can't say, well, I'm not comfortable in conflict, so I'm not going to communicate and I'm going to shut down. No, you need to push yourself, ask the Lord for help, and go as his helpmate and say, you have to talk about it, you have to tell me, how are you doing? How are you feeling? So, I feel like it's just, it was such a beautiful valley when we look back now.   Laura Dugger: (23:12 - 23:25) Another previous guest had said she noticed when she was in the valley, that's when you're closest to the living water.   Jon Rocke: (23:13 - 24:41) Oh, absolutely. For sure. That's how creeks run, through valleys. Yeah. And I think our parenting, it was helpful for us to have both sides of our personality in parenting because I think we could address situations with our kids from different viewpoints and different ways to think about things, and those were helpful things as well.   But we also, during all sorts of the periods of time in our marriage, we had some little things that just reminded us. We had little words. So one was, you know, “we need to swim back.” So, you can often find yourself, because of a season of time or a season with your kids or whatever on the different islands, and we would just say, we got to swim back. And so that was one of our things that we did. And then we also had a, if we went too long, we just realized we weren't intentional about our intimacy of any kind. It was just basically, “Hey, you didn't kiss me today.” And we used to make that, “No, you didn't kiss me today.” And it was just a thing we tried to do to make sure that we had these little things that just kept us reminded. And so, they were really, they were kind of practical, just little code words for us that made a difference and got our minds back to where it needed to be.   Jolene Rocke: (24:41 - 24:50) Yeah, and in the busyness, that's easy to remember those little swing thoughts.   Laura Dugger: (24:50 - 30:17) Swim back. And now a brief message from our sponsor.   Did you know you can go to college tuition free just by being a team member at Chick-fil-A East Peoria? Yes, you heard that right. Free college education. All Chick-fil-A East Peoria team members in good standing are immediately eligible for a free college education through Point University. Point University is a fully accredited private Christian college located in West Point, Georgia. 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We ask that you also will share by sharing financially, sharing the Savvy Sauce podcast episodes, and sharing a five-star rating and review. You can also share any of our social media posts on Instagram or Facebook. We are grateful for all of it and we just love partnering together with you.   Now, back to the show. What encouragement do you have for healthy communication and healthy conflict resolution in marriage?   Jon Rocke: (30:19 - 31:31) God's grace. It's going to have to take time. You have to find that time together. So, I think it's all about prioritizing that time. I don't necessarily like conflict, but I know in our marriage you can't avoid it. And so, we just had to work through it right away. And so, I would say don't let time simmer conflict because that usually never makes it better.   Certainly, there's a sense of if there's something that's really emotional and maybe you need some space. My problem is I often don't give Jolene that space and that's hard on her, it really is, and sometimes not fair. But in the same vein, for me it felt like I didn't care if I just said, “Well, go ahead and be angry or be whatever or be upset about this or just let's not deal with it.” And she was gracious in pressing in and doing that. But I think don't let time go, just deal with it.   Jolene Rocke: (31:32 - 33:26) And two, the encouragement I think of is that Jon and I tell each other everything, every little thing. And we are very aware of couples that don't. And when Jon was holding back for me in that valley time, I really noticed it and I felt pretty alone. So, if you're always telling each other everything, there should be no secrets. So that just means there might be conflict then. If you're going to tell each other everything, then there might be conflict and you need to be prepared for that.   But that's better than me not saying anything. I sometimes say it's like a teapot, you're simmering or you're spouting. What's the perfect in the middle balance? It's really important to not simmer because you will spout eventually and then that's a harder conflict than if you just kept talking, kept telling every little thing. And so, we do tell each other every little thing.   Laura Dugger: (33:26 - 33:40) Well, and to go with that metaphor, if you have a release valve where that hot air can escape, it sounds like your communication has been that where you can get the water temperature back to a healthy place in the relationship.   Jolene Rocke: (33:40 - 33:55) Yeah, yes. And that takes work. So, I mean, honestly, what encouragement? Don't give up. Just keep going because it's worth it.   Laura Dugger: (33:55 - 34:10) Well, and I'm thinking back. Okay, so you had three kids. They're somewhat close together and you were young. So those years when all of your children were in the home, even elementary school age, that timeframe, what did that look like for communication? How did you still make sure you connected every day?   Jon Rocke: (33:26 - 34:31) Well, then throw in, we went to college after we had kids, which was actually, again, just God's grace and gift to us that we were able to leave town, leave the family business for a while, didn't think we were going to be involved in family business, went out to Indiana, went to school, and we didn't have anybody else but ourselves. And so that, again, was just his gift to us as young. We went in 1980, so that was two years after we were married. So, we already had Janelle at that point, and then Jamie came along soon after. And so, I had school but had to work to support. Jolene had to work and she was mom to two little ones. And so, again, I think it was just those times of making sure that we said nothing else can get in the way of us. Again, another phrase that we just had was, you know, we can get through anything together and nothing apart.   Jolene Rocke: (34:32 - 35:21) And that's not a flippant statement for us. That means we're trying and we're going to find the intentional time, put them to bed early, and make sure on weekends we're connecting well. And that meant sometimes driving with our kids. We'd go on drives. But that's Jon and I being able to talk. And then if they're goofing off in the back seat, it's okay. It's just fine because we actually are having talk time. Drive time has always been great communication time for us.   Laura Dugger: (35:21 - 35:35) That's really helpful, I think, for parents in any season. And you're talking about God's grace. So how has grace, and even forgiveness, benefited your relationship?   Jolene Rocke: (35:35 - 35:40) It's everything to our relationship.   Jon Rocke: (35:22 - 37:12) It's the only thing in everything. The parable of the unjust steward in Matthew 18 and just this idea that if you catch the enormity of your sin, then you can forgive others. And so that has been, I think, an important part of what we do because I love that whole story. Peter is asking that question, “How many times do I have to forgive somebody?” And if you think about a marriage context, well, that's a great question because my guess is it's going to be thousands upon thousands of times for whatever little or big things they are. And he's kind of like loading up. I feel that he's getting ready to say, “I've already forgiven this person six times. So, is it seven? And then after that, there's no more?” And the whole point of that is, oh, you really want to keep numbers, Peter? Here's the numbers. You've been forgiven zillions. And so, what's the little trifle amount that you're not going to forgive? And so, I'm thankful that Jolene is gracious because she's had to forgive me and continues to. We're still learning in a new season of life where now we get to work together, which to me is a really great joy. But it's also a different reality where we have a lot of work talk. Well, that's great. And we love that. But that can't dominate everything either. And so that's another one of those things that we have to figure out how to carve out our time away from work. Even though we enjoy working together and it's really fun, it's a new thing. That can't get in the way of us either.   Jolene Rocke: (37:13 - 40:14) There's got to be grace on both parts that now as I look at him as a boss also. And my husband, you know, I need to give a lot of grace to realize he's working within a momentum around a team and a leadership. But then as he comes home, and I'm very fully aware now of what a hat change that means for a man. That means that he's taking off his hat now and becoming my husband at home. And so, it's grace on both sides as he sees me working even under him or with him as a team. But it's a lot of grace and forgiveness over the years because in the early years as you're raising children, there might be unmet expectations is something I wrote down because I feel like as I think back to this pursuer of God and who I married and I remember those early years thinking, well, wow, he's not leading in devotions in the family. And I'm kind of struggling to find, I need to, as the mom then, pick that up and make sure we're doing with the children some family devotions. Well, that can create controversy. It can be that I would be upset, but I needed to forgive him for the fact that he didn't mean to do that and abdicate that responsibility. He just didn't know. And so, there's so much about being graceful as a wife to say, okay, I understand. That wasn't maybe how you were raised, or you didn't see that modeled in the home. But this is what I would desire for our family. And so, you just keep working and you keep forgiving because we've been forgiven so much, as Jon said. So, we know that. And I think the other key thing then with forgiveness becomes no record keeping, just as love is in 1 Corinthians 13. It doesn't keep the record of wrongs. I don't need to sit around with my time and in my brain and think about how much I've forgiven Jon. I need to think about the fact that God's forgiven so much in me, and he has to forgive me all the time. So, you're on this equal footing with forgiveness rather than trying to harbor a record of wrongs.   Laura Dugger: (40:14 - 40:40) Well, and I think you bring up examples for how it works in our families as well with children. And so, it's clear you two have such a solid marriage and you also have a thriving relationship with your adult children and your grandchildren and all their families. So, I think you just have a lot that you could teach us about raising a family as well. What are you so thankful that you did when your kids were living at home that you're now getting to see the payoff as they're adults?   Jon Rocke: (40:16 - 41:43) We literally grew up with our kids. So sorry for our kids that they had to, you know, grow up with their mom and dad. But that's been a lot of fun too because we did a lot of play. Again, these are just little things for us, these little words. So, as the kids were young, we used to, something that bothered them is I would tell them pretty plainly that I love mom most. And so, kids will always try to drive a wedge between mom and dad. That's just part of the fallen nature of kids. And so, we really communicated early. Our kids will tell you that was a hard lesson for them to learn that they didn't quite understand at that age, right? But they've really come to appreciate that in their own marriages. And then the other thing that we said was we choose you second. So, they knew we choose each other first because you're going to be gone someday and mom's not. And so, but we will always choose you second. So, friends were not a higher priority or social or hobby or anything. You know, the kids were always knew they were second. And so our kids are scattered all across, although we have Jamie and Jonathan here, one family here in Morton that we love to live life with. The others are gone, but I think we're still close in a lot of ways from that.   Jolene Rocke: (41:45 - 45:27) Yeah, I think we're a close family because we have stuck together through not just the ups, but the downs, but we're fun loving. Jon and I like games. We like to do stuff, and we like to go places. We prioritized vacation when they were little so that we were all together in an intentional environment that was away from home. And so, we were together, they enjoyed going to Florida every year and it was always what we called just happenstances that were so adverse. It wasn't your ideal. And so, we did not have ideal things happen on any trip, actually, that we go on. So, what we decided to call them is adventures. So, we intentionally took adverse situations, whether that's a flat tire, going to Florida with all the kids and it's the middle of the night and we're all sitting at a gas station on the curb waiting for the next tire to get fixed. It's just, we just always called them adventures and I'm not sorry for that. That's something our kids are passing on to their kids when things happen. Our son in particular, Jordan, his family seems to have a lot of adventures, like Jon and I have had. And that's what they call them to their children. So, I'm not sorry for the word adventure. Jon taught me a saying that he used to say, you love your children, even if you don't like them or you will lose them. And that was really important in the teenage years. When one of our children was struggling in junior high, I knew even if I didn't like the way this one was acting, I needed to just keep loving them as scripture says, right? Not if they're perfect, but all the time. And so, we didn't lose her through that time, I think because there was so much intentional loving beyond the liking. The other thing that I would just mention with that to encourage any, any mom or dad, I picked up the book, The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman and had this daughter read it with me so that we can learn, how do we love each other? Well, through this time when it feels like we don't really like each other that well. So, well, wow. I had no idea. It was physical touch for you. And I, I thought it was the acts of service. And you would notice that I picked up your room because I knew you had a hard day in a test at school. Well, there was never any knowledge or awareness that I did that for her. But whenever I put my arms around her and gave her a giant hug and wouldn't let her go until she melted in my arms, I realized, yes, that's what she, that's how I can love her best.   Laura Dugger: (45:27 - 45:50) That is awesome to hear that story. It is helpful to have actionable things that we can replicate. And so, I am going to link in the show notes to a few of our episodes that may be beneficial. If people want to take that concept a step further, Dr. Gary Chapman has been a previous guest. I'll link to those. And then also Katie Mueller talked about traveling with your family and the lessons that the Lord teaches his children about traveling in the Bible and how that applies to us. That's great. So, if you're willing, will you share anything more about the honeymoon? I'm so curious now.   Jon Rocke: (45:27 - 46:35) We will. I feel like we're taking too much time here.   Jolene Rocke: (46:35 - 46:36) I don't know, but well, we knew that this was setting the tone for marriage as far as adventures.   Jon Rocke: (46:36 - 46:37) But well, the very first off we, we got on a plane. So, we got married on a Sunday and we were flying out down to Florida on Sunday night. We got to Atlanta where we were supposed to connect to another plane. We were supposed to go to Fort Myers, Florida and there had been a storm and, and they were rushing to get us on the right flights or to get us to the next flight. And they put us on the wrong plane. You know, this was back in the day where that could happen. Couldn't happen today, but put us on the wrong plane. We ended up in Melbourne, Florida at midnight last flight of the night. You know, we're newlyweds. We're supposed to be, you know, on our honeymoon. They put us up at a Holiday Inn Express with the crew and said, you know, we'll get you out a flight. You have to be up at 4 a.m. And so, you know, I was, our first night was not necessarily what you would, you know, call the most romantic night that we could have. And then do you want to tell the second story of our honeymoon?   Jolene Rocke: (46:36 - 46:37) The canoe trip.   Jon Rocke: (46:37 - 46:37) Yeah.   Jolene Rocke: (46:37 - 47:28) The canoe trip is, I have such bad allergies to many things. And so, Jon knew that because we tried to go horseback riding and I thought I'd be okay because it was outdoors, but the dander on the horse made me just blow up into a big ball on my face. And so, he realized how much I have a problem with allergies, but we decided to go canoeing in a very narrow mangrove swamp. That was really depleted in, in its depth that day. And so, we were canoeing along, but we, we got into the side of the mangrove trees and out came a Hornets, Hornets out of this giant nest and stung me all over my back.   Jon Rocke: (47:28 - 47:50) And so Jon went into, I'm like thinking that my six day, you know, marriage is over. My wife, who's so allergic, we're half hour out on our journey and I'm, she's like going to die on the spot. Cause I figured if she's so allergic to animals, then this many, you know, bee stings or wasp stings, she's, you know, she's dead.   Jolene Rocke: (47:52 - 48:12) So he jumps, jumps out. Yeah. First, the truth is he took my top off and started taking mud from the bottom of the creek and, just plasters me with mud on my back. And then he jumps out of the canoe and starts running the, the canoe. Cause it was pretty shallow.   Jon Rocke: (48:12 - 48:31) I decided it was going to be quicker to get her back in time. I figured I had about 30 minutes, you know, to, to try to get her to some medical attention. And so, yeah, so I'm running the canoe back instead of paddling it. Cause I knew I could get faster. Well, then I cut my foot on a shoal and we're a mess.   Jolene Rocke: (48:31 - 48:37) I mean, he had it. What? Like six-inch stitches. So, we ended up in the ER here.   Jon Rocke: (48:37 - 48:38) Yeah.   Jolene Rocke: (48:38 - 48:52) Both of us with me, with stings, Jon, with a cut. And, and that was just the start of the honeymoon that we called a giant adventure adventure since it wasn't great.   Jon Rocke: (48:52 - 48:55) It's been a 44-year adventure.   Laura Dugger: (48:55 - 49:15) You did start with quite the adventure. I love that. And I think the husbands' listening will appreciate, of course you took their top off first.   Jon Rocke: (49:03 - 49:04) That's right.   Jolene Rocke: (49:05 - 49:07) It was a little embarrassing.   Jon Rocke: (49:08 - 49:10) It was a good thing. Nobody else.   Jolene Rocke: (49:10 - 49:15) Nobody else.   Laura Dugger: (49:15 - 49:25) Sorry. I had to tease on that part, but through various seasons, how did you prioritize one another above your kids, your career and your own families of origin?   Jon Rocke: (49:25 - 50:35) We just knew we had to have time. So, a couple of things. I mean, we had a fortunate built in mechanism too, to take trips together. So, within our family business, we had conferences and such that we had to attend. And so, we made that a priority that we were going to do those together. I wasn't going to just go by myself. And so, a couple of times a year, and now that we're working together, it can feel like life blurs between everything. So, while we're at home, we're still talking about work and we're still dealing with ministry. And the other thing is with our kids away, a lot of our trip time is spent with our kids. So, we have to make that, that's gotta be a priority, but we realized we still need just our time away. and when we got, we went down to Florida and we just said, okay, no work talk for these five days, you know, no work talk. And it was pretty fun because most of the time Jolene broke that rule. And I would say, wait a minute, no work talk.   Jolene Rocke: (50:36 - 50:36) It's true.   Jon Rocke: (50:37 - 51:09) It's very true. But those, so trips were a big thing for us, and they don't have to be a big deal trip, but a weekend away to break the routine. You know, the example of that was, that's why God created festivals and holidays were to break routine and to have a stop in our everyday lives. And so, he knew we needed that to reconnect with him. Well, we know we need that in our marriages is to break the routine.   Jolene Rocke: (51:10 - 52:17) Very intentionally. Jon was wise enough to know we needed that as even as young as he was. Can you imagine the volumes of love that that spoke to me, that he wanted me to go with him on the trips. So that meant so much to me. And it still does today because he always wants me to go with him. And then I, I just have over the years, like when the kids were at home, that was days of rest for me when he was in meetings. But as I started growing too, as a person and not needing as much rest, I also would go into all the meetings because I liked the learning. But even as we went through college, like I just was always a part of the learning. And, and I liked that, but Jon included me. That said a lot to me.   Laura Dugger: (52:18 - 52:25) And I love your companionship, how you prioritize that. What advice do you have for all of us married couples as we seek to grow as one rather than start to grow parallel or even worse, start to grow apart from one another?   Jon Rocke: (52:18 - 52:47) Yeah, I think find things to do together. That's part of how even the biking, the tandem thing came about. Cause if we went out on bikes on our individual bikes, then I'm like, I'm wanting to run ahead. Well, you know, and then, and she's like, you know, you're not getting very much exercise or whatever the case may be. But then on a tandem, we could accomplish everything together. And so, finding some of those things.   Jolene Rocke: (52:47 - 54:56) So there's seasons of time when you're raising your children, like that, Jon was biking by himself and with some other men in a fast pace for extreme exercise. And I was doing my thing. And so, I'm not saying that hobbies apart from one another are negative, but for us, they've been mostly together. And so that just means that even there was a period that yes, Jon would go out golfing, not in excess, but when our kids were around and little, I think I was communicating even in that, that you don't just go off golfing every Saturday and leave your wife with the kids on a Saturday because you now that's your day off work. No, it's, we never get a day off work. So, you need to kick in at home too. So, there was this balance, I think is a really good word for how do you, how do you do like even individual hobbies and exercise even, but then mostly we're always trying to figure out how we can do things together. So, taking a back seat, literally on a tandem bike and knowing that that was going to help our marriage to be together. I also said recently now in a decade ago, I will learn how to golf. And so that, that just meant, again, I have no, no interest that much in golfing. I thought I loved riding the car around and being outside, but now it's like, yes, I will learn to golf if that means that that's another hobby and a sport and an activity that we can do together. So, we started a Friday night golf time, just Jon and I, it's a date night of golf and Dairy Queen supper. We call it Dairy Queen supper because we just don't eat supper, but we eat Dairy Queen after we go. So there again, there's just like, what are, what can we do together? And we're still doing date nights because it's just, we actually are really good friends still.   Jon Rocke: (54:57 - 55:51) Well, I think like I say, every season has been different for us. There was a time where kids were intense and Joe was a phenomenal mom and, was totally engaged in that. And you're in your career phase too. And so, all those things are competing. Well, then we've come back in the last five years and now we work together. So that's a different whole different dynamic. And so that's why we needed, you know, yeah, we need a golf and Dairy Queen night because we just need to get away from the intensity of our work relationship, you know, and take that break on our tandems. We usually ride for breakfast. So, most things have to do with food. It's not about exercise. It's about how to eat. So that's kind of just part of what we do.   Laura Dugger: (55:51 - 56:19) I love it though. That's an interest for all people. It's something that we have to do multiple times a day. Well, what do you want to leave us with? Whether it's a challenge or scripture, it can be anything, but how would you like to wind down our time together today?   Jolene Rocke: (56:19 - 56:30) I'm going to just say to encourage everyone. Our marriage has taken compromise and it's taken communication and it pays off in the end.   Jon Rocke: (56:19 - 57:11) You know, Ephesians 5 is really an important understanding that it's submitting to each other. The idea of wives submit to your husband, you're not catching the whole picture of that. If that's what your focus is, because it's husband loves you, love your wives as Christ loved the church. And so, and it starts the whole section off with submit to one another. And so, we have to be just intentional and committed. One of my favorite sayings is from Augustine, who says, when he was in prayer one time says to God, “Command what you will, but give what you command.” And so, when I think about our marriage, that's what grace is all about. Yes, it takes intentionality and commitment, but that only comes by his grace.   Jolene Rocke: (57:11 - 57:55) And one other thing that I thought of is that we always taught our kids to remember whose they are. And that just means that if you do that within a marriage too, and you're remembering that you're the Lord's, you're made in his image, then you relate and you will love the other one better. Even as you know your identity in Christ first, you will love your mate better.   Laura Dugger: (57:55 - 58:05) Amen. And you too may know we're called The Savvy Sauce because savvy is synonymous with practical knowledge. And so, as my final question for both of you today, what is your savvy sauce?   Jon Rocke: (57:56 - 58:07) You know, I just say submission is a good thing. It's not associated that way, but in a marriage it's such a good thing.   Jolene Rocke: (58:08 - 59:13) So that's both submitting to each other, not just the wife being clamped down. But our savvy sauce would be that sacrifice and submission are good things. They're not bad words. So, in our experience, a savvy sauce for our 44-year-old marriage is that sacrifice and submission have been very good things on both of our parts.   Laura Dugger: (59:13 - 59:20) Well, you clearly live this out, and you've been great role models to Mark and to me and our family. You love one another with such an intensity, and you love your Lord that way, and you love your children that way in your community. And I just see the way that He's had this ripple out from being intentional in the most key important parts of life, and that He's really blessed you in that, but He's also blessed all of us around you. So, thank you for sharing your journey with us. Thank you so much for being my guest.   Jolene Rocke: (59:20 - 59:22) It's been so great to be here with you. Thanks for asking, Laura.   Jon Rocke: (59:13 - 59:27) Yeah, it's been a privilege for us just to take the time to reflect again and realize the challenges, but really just celebrate what God has done through His grace in us and our marriage. So, thanks.   Laura Dugger: (59:27 - 1:03:10) One more thing before you go, have you heard the term gospel before? It simply means good news. And I want to share the best news with you, but it starts with the bad news.   Every single one of us were born sinners, but Christ desires to rescue us from our sin, which is something we cannot do for ourselves. This means there's absolutely no chance we can make it to heaven on our own. So, for you and for me, it means we deserve death, and we can never pay back the sacrifice we owe to be saved.   We need a savior, but God loved us so much. He made a way for his only son to willingly die in our place as the perfect substitute. This gives us hope of life forever in right relationship with him.   That is good news. Jesus lived the perfect life. We could never live and died in our place for our sin.   This was God's plan to make a way to reconcile with us so that God can look at us and see Jesus. We can be covered and justified through the work Jesus finished. If we choose to receive what he has done for us, Romans 10:9 says, “that if you confess with your mouth, Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved.”   So, you pray with me now. Heavenly father, thank you for sending Jesus to take our place. I pray someone today right now is touched and chooses to turn their life over to you.   Will you clearly guide them and help them take their next step in faith to declare you as Lord of their life? We trust you to work and change lives now for eternity. In Jesus name we pray.   Amen. If you prayed that prayer, you are declaring him for me. So, me for him, you get the opportunity to live your life for him.   And at this podcast, we're called The Savvy Sauce for a reason. We want to give you practical tools to implement the knowledge you have learned. So, you're ready to get started.   First, tell someone, say it out loud, get a Bible. The first day I made this decision, my parents took me to Barnes and Noble and let me choose my own Bible. I selected the Quest NIV Bible and I love it.   You can start by reading the book of John. Also get connected locally, which just means tell someone who's a part of a church in your community that you made a decision to follow Christ. I'm assuming they will be thrilled to talk with you about further steps such as going to church and getting connected to other believers to encourage you.   We want to celebrate with you too. So, feel free to leave a comment for us here. If you did make a decision to follow Christ, we also have show notes included where you can read scripture that describes this process.   And finally, be encouraged. Luke 15:10 says, “in the same way, I tell you, there is rejoicing in the presence of the angels of God over one sinner who repents.” The heavens are praising with you for your decision today.   And if you've already received this good news, I pray you have someone to share it with. You are loved and I look forward to meeting you here next time.

Bully culture doesn't emerge overnight—it grows quietly, layer by layer, until it becomes woven into the very fabric of an organization. For many, it shows up as subtle intimidation, undermining comments, shifting goalposts, or a constant sense of walking on eggshells. For others, it's more overt: public shaming, manipulative power plays, or leaders who confuse fear with effectiveness.   In this episode, Cindy Watson sits down with Andrew Regal for an eye-opening conversation about Negotiating Bully Culture. With more than 30 years of leadership experience across major news and media platforms—including Court TV, CNBC, MSNBC, and The Wall Street Journal—Andrew brings a deep, insider perspective on high-pressure environments where bullying often becomes normalized. He's also the author of Surviving Bully Culture, a compelling and timely book that sheds light on how toxic dynamics take root and, more importantly, how we can navigate them with clarity, courage, and strategy. Join Cindy and Andrew as they explore how to recognize bully culture, why traditional approaches often fall short, and what negotiation tools can help individuals reclaim power, foster healthier communication, and shift entrenched systems from the inside out. In this episode, you will learn: The difference between a leader having a bad day and someone who's truly a bully. The reason behind why bullying is repeated across so many organizations and industries? The particular personality type that attracts bullies. The difficulty to identify these types of abuse. What is the most hurtful form of bullying? The long term impacts of bullying. And many more! Learn more about Andy: Website: https://andyregal.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/andrew.regal1/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/andy-regal-b701226/ Checkout Andy's book:https://andyregal.com/my-book/   If you're looking to up-level your negotiation skills, I have everything from online to group to my signature one-on-one mastermind & VIP experiences available to help you better leverage your innate power to get more of what you want and deserve in life. Check out our website at www.artofFeminineNegotiation.com if that sounds interesting to you.   Get Cindy's book here: Amazon   https://www.amazon.com/Art-Feminine-Negotiation-Boardroom-Bedroom-ebook/dp/B0B8KPCYZP?inf_contact_key=94d07c699eea186d2adfbddfef6fb9e2&inf_contact_key=013613337189d4d12be8d2bca3c26821680f8914173f9191b1c0223e68310bb1 EBook   https://www.amazon.com/Art-Feminine-Negotiation-Boardroom-Bedroom-ebook/dp/B0B8KPCYZP?inf_contact_key=94d07c699eea186d2adfbddfef6fb9e2&inf_contact_key=013613337189d4d12be8d2bca3c26821680f8914173f9191b1c0223e68310bb1 Barnes and Noble   https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/the-art-of-feminine-negotiation-cindy-watson/1141499614?ean=9781631959776 CONNECT WITH CINDY: Website: www.womenonpurpose.ca Website: www.practicingwithpurpose.org Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/womenonpurposecommunity/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/womenonpurposecoaching/ LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/thecindywatson Show: https://www.womenonpurpose.ca/media/podcast-2/ X(Twitter):  https://twitter.com/womenonpurpose1 YouTube:https://www.youtube.com/@hersuasion Email: cindy@womenonpurpose.ca

Brad Stulberg is a bestselling author of the new book The Way of Excellence, a performance coach, faculty member at the University of Michigan, and a husband and father.The Way of Excellence comes out tomorrow, and you can pick up a copy at any major bookseller like Amazon, Barnes and Noble, Audible.com, or Bookshop.org. You can learn more about Brad and follow his work at his website, (https://www.bradstulberg.com/) and on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/bradstulberg/

In this episode of Innovation Meets Leadership, host Natalie Born sits down with author, keynote speaker, and former executive Scott Millson to explore what it truly means to operate at the Frequency of Excellence. Drawing from decades of leadership experience—from the U.S. Navy to global consulting—Scott shares how excellence isn't accidental, but something leaders must intentionally tune into every day.Together, Natalie and Scott unpack how curiosity, mentorship, presence, and self-awareness shape high-performing leaders and teams. From recognizing when organizations start to drift, to understanding how leaders act as emotional force multipliers, this conversation offers practical insights for leaders who want to elevate standards, strengthen culture, and build influence that lasts beyond titles and roles.If you're ready to stop operating on autopilot and start leading with clarity, curiosity, and purpose, this episode will help you tune into the signal that drives real excellence.[00:00 – 01:10] Welcome & Introducing Scott MillsonScott's background as an executive, author, and leadership coach.Introducing Frequency of Excellence.Why leadership today requires deeper intentionality.[01:11 – 05:58] Why Scott Wrote Frequency of ExcellenceGratitude, mentorship, and life's “second curve.”Turning 30 years of lessons into a book.Sharing wisdom instead of keeping it locked away.[05:59 – 12:30] What It Means to Tune Into ExcellenceExcellence as a “frequency” leaders must tune into.The radio metaphor for mindset and awareness.Learning to speak with purpose and intention.[12:31 – 14:06] Leaders as Force MultipliersWhy team behavior mirrors leadership behavior.“Calm is contagious” in high-pressure environments.How leaders amplify culture—good or bad.[14:07 – 17:34] Mentorship, Especially for Women LeadersThe impact of female mentors on Scott's career.Why mentorship should be organic, not forced.The mentorship gap and how to close it.[17:35 – 20:31] Choosing People Over PositionsWhy leaders should choose a leader, not just a job.Surrounding yourself with people who elevate standards.Addition through subtraction in relationships.[20:32 – 23:25] Raising Your Leadership StandardWho you surround yourself with shapes your future.Reflection as a leadership habit.Aligning with people who operate at excellence.[23:26 – 25:15] Curiosity as a Leadership SuperpowerWhy curiosity is underused in leadership.Being truly present with others.Making curiosity your leadership advantage.[25:16 – 27:48] Better Questions, Better LeadersWhy “What do you do?” is the wrong question.Asking what excites and motivates people.Listening instead of waiting to talk.Quotes – from Scott“Excellence surrounds us, but we have to be tuned into the right frequency to pick it up.” – Scott Millson“As leaders, we are force multipliers. Our behavior gets amplified through our teams.” – Scott Millson“Curiosity is the most underutilized superpower leaders have.” – Scott MillsonGuest Links for Scott MillsonLinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/scott-millson/Website: https://scottmillson.com/Book: Frequency of Excellence (Available on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, and major retailers)If this conversation resonated with you, leave a review and share this episode with a leader who's ready to raise standards, lead with curiosity, and tune into the Frequency of Excellence.

Today we're putting The Tonearm's needle on author and behavioral scientist Michael Hallsworth.Michel has spent the last two decades applying behavioral science to real-world problems at the Behavioural Insights Team. He's held positions at Princeton, Columbia, Imperial College London, and the University of Pennsylvania.Michael's new book, The Hypocrisy Trap, takes on something we all recognize instantly but rarely understand: why we're so quick to spot hypocrisy in others yet are blind to it in ourselves. He shows how our hunt for inconsistency has become a weapon in politics and daily life, one that actually breeds more of what it tries to eliminate. The book reveals why some hypocrisy might be unavoidable in functioning democracies, and how our relentless attacks on it can backfire in dangerous ways.We talk about double standards, the psychology behind moral accusations, and why the most authentic-seeming politicians might be the most deceptive. Michael explains how we can tell the difference between hypocrisy that harms society and the everyday compromises that allow us to function together.–Dig DeeperGuest and BooksVisit Michael Hallsworth at michaelhallsworth.comPurchase Michael Hallsworth's The Hypocrisy Trap: How Changing What We Criticize Can Improve Our Lives from MIT Press, Penguin Random House, Bookshop, Barnes and Noble, or AmazonMichael Hallsworth and Elspeth Kirkman's Behavioral Insights from MIT PressConnect with Michael Hallsworth on LinkedInBehavioral Scientist column by Michael HallsworthOrganizations and InstitutionsThe Behavioural Insights Team (BIT) - World-leading organization applying behavioral science in support of social purpose goalsDr. Michael Hallsworth at BITMaster of Behavioral and Decision Sciences Program at University of PennsylvaniaImperial College LondonColumbia UniversityPrinceton UniversityKey Concepts and ResearchBehavioral economics and public policy - Michael Hallsworth's Google Scholar profileNature Human Behaviour - Journal featuring Hallsworth's researchJournal of Public EconomicsThe LancetHistorical and Philosophical ReferencesHannah Arendt's On Revolution - Analysis of the French and American RevolutionsHannah Arendt on hypocrisy and the Reign of Terror - "Robespierre's war upon hypocrisy transformed the 'despotism of liberty' into the Reign of Terror"The French Revolution Reign of Terror - Historical contextMaximilien Robespierre - Key figure in the French RevolutionPolitical Examples DiscussedBoris Johnson's COVID-19 party scandal - The "Partygate" scandal discussed in the episodeBrexit and UK politicsRelated Reading"Our Hypocrisy Blind Spot" by Michael Hallsworth - Essay in Behavioral Scientist"The Future of Behavioral Insights Demands Human-Centered Design" - Hallsworth and Kirkman on behavioral scienceHannah Arendt quotes on hypocrisy - "What makes it so plausible to assume that hypocrisy is the vice of vices is that integrity can indeed exist under the cover of all other vices except this one"-Dig into this episode's complete show notes at podcast.thetonearm.com–• Did you enjoy this episode? Please share it with a friend! You can also rate The Tonearm ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ and leave a review on Apple Podcasts.• Subscribe! Be the first to check out each new episode of The Tonearm in your podcast app of choice.• Looking for more? Visit podcast.thetonearm.com for bonus content, web-only interviews + features, and the Talk Of The Tonearm email newsletter. You can also follow us on Bluesky, Mastodon, YouTube, and LinkedIn.• Be sure to bookmark our online magazine, The Tonearm! → thetonearm.com Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Today we're putting The Tonearm's needle on author and behavioral scientist Michael Hallsworth.Michel has spent the last two decades applying behavioral science to real-world problems at the Behavioural Insights Team. He's held positions at Princeton, Columbia, Imperial College London, and the University of Pennsylvania.Michael's new book, The Hypocrisy Trap, takes on something we all recognize instantly but rarely understand: why we're so quick to spot hypocrisy in others yet are blind to it in ourselves. He shows how our hunt for inconsistency has become a weapon in politics and daily life, one that actually breeds more of what it tries to eliminate. The book reveals why some hypocrisy might be unavoidable in functioning democracies, and how our relentless attacks on it can backfire in dangerous ways.We talk about double standards, the psychology behind moral accusations, and why the most authentic-seeming politicians might be the most deceptive. Michael explains how we can tell the difference between hypocrisy that harms society and the everyday compromises that allow us to function together.–Dig DeeperGuest and BooksVisit Michael Hallsworth at michaelhallsworth.comPurchase Michael Hallsworth's The Hypocrisy Trap: How Changing What We Criticize Can Improve Our Lives from MIT Press, Penguin Random House, Bookshop, Barnes and Noble, or AmazonMichael Hallsworth and Elspeth Kirkman's Behavioral Insights from MIT PressConnect with Michael Hallsworth on LinkedInBehavioral Scientist column by Michael HallsworthOrganizations and InstitutionsThe Behavioural Insights Team (BIT) - World-leading organization applying behavioral science in support of social purpose goalsDr. Michael Hallsworth at BITMaster of Behavioral and Decision Sciences Program at University of PennsylvaniaImperial College LondonColumbia UniversityPrinceton UniversityKey Concepts and ResearchBehavioral economics and public policy - Michael Hallsworth's Google Scholar profileNature Human Behaviour - Journal featuring Hallsworth's researchJournal of Public EconomicsThe LancetHistorical and Philosophical ReferencesHannah Arendt's On Revolution - Analysis of the French and American RevolutionsHannah Arendt on hypocrisy and the Reign of Terror - "Robespierre's war upon hypocrisy transformed the 'despotism of liberty' into the Reign of Terror"The French Revolution Reign of Terror - Historical contextMaximilien Robespierre - Key figure in the French RevolutionPolitical Examples DiscussedBoris Johnson's COVID-19 party scandal - The "Partygate" scandal discussed in the episodeBrexit and UK politicsRelated Reading"Our Hypocrisy Blind Spot" by Michael Hallsworth - Essay in Behavioral Scientist"The Future of Behavioral Insights Demands Human-Centered Design" - Hallsworth and Kirkman on behavioral scienceHannah Arendt quotes on hypocrisy - "What makes it so plausible to assume that hypocrisy is the vice of vices is that integrity can indeed exist under the cover of all other vices except this one"-Dig into this episode's complete show notes at podcast.thetonearm.com–• Did you enjoy this episode? Please share it with a friend! You can also rate The Tonearm ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ and leave a review on Apple Podcasts.• Subscribe! Be the first to check out each new episode of The Tonearm in your podcast app of choice.• Looking for more? Visit podcast.thetonearm.com for bonus content, web-only interviews + features, and the Talk Of The Tonearm email newsletter. You can also follow us on Bluesky, Mastodon, YouTube, and LinkedIn.• Be sure to bookmark our online magazine, The Tonearm! → thetonearm.com Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Upgrade to the Premium Podcast Experience - https://rachelhollis.supercast.comDive even Deeper in the Coaching Community - Rachel Hollis CoachingCheck out Upcoming Live Events!!Original Airdate - July 11th 2025In this episode, Rachel Hollis discusses her personal journey of losing weight during perimenopause. She shares the frustration and challenges she faced, including a major shift in hormones that made her usual fitness and nutrition routines ineffective. Rachel emphasizes the importance of experimentation and finding what works specifically for your body.Get your copy of Rachel's New Book Here: Audible, Amazon, Barnes & Noble, Books-A-Millon, Bookshop.org, or wherever books are sold!01:18 Personal Struggles and Realizations01:46 The Turning Point: Getting Real with Myself02:37 Detailed Breakdown of My Weight Loss Journey03:04 Podcast Introduction and Disclaimer04:02 Understanding Perimenopause and Weight Gain07:51 The Frustration of Unexplained Weight Gain12:12 Experimenting with Diet and Exercise22:05 Family Support and Nutritional Guidance28:18 The Frustration of Dietary Changes31:46 Introduction to the Slow Carb Diet33:07 Morning Protein Routine36:27 Calorie Counting Realizations40:06 Adjusting to a Strict Nutrition Plan46:35 The Impact of Anti-Inflammatory Diet51:42 Experimenting with Nutrition55:12 Final Thoughts and EncouragementSign up for Rachel's weekly email: https://msrachelhollis.com/insider/Call the podcast hotline and leave a voicemail! Call (737) 400-4626Watch the podcast on YouTube: http://youtube.com/@MsRachelHollisFollow along on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/MsRachelHollisTo learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Christine Whisler went from reporting the bad news to spreading some good news through her company Southern Palm Communications in Tampa, Florida. She helps companies - specifically philanthropies - find and uplift their own good voice. That's what she came on to join us to talk about - and yes, we do - but then something else happened, right in the moment, when she went to answer a question about expectations. And that something turned into pure magic as she shares how she took one of the most difficult moments of her life - losing her mother - and one of the happiest moments - her own wedding - and blended them together in the most unexpected way. For this time we are living through, where there is so much darkness around us, listen to her journey, how she found and spread the light, and how you may be able to do it for yourself. Let the inspiration continue... ________________ Steve's third book in his cozy mystery series, THE DOG WALKING DETECTIVES is finally here: SEASON'S SLAYINGS! Get your copy on Amazon: https://bit.ly/3WYTPiR or Barnes & Noble: https://bit.ly/4hOjILR Grab the first two: Book 1: DROWN TOWN Amazon: https://amzn.to/478W8mp Barnes & Noble: https://bit.ly/3Mv7cCk & Book 2: MURDER UNMASKED Amazon: https://shorturl.at/fDR47 Barnes & Noble: https://shorturl.at/3ccTy

Folks are rising up across the country outraged by ICE's reign of terror. Our main story is on the popular fightback in Minnesota, but first we have headlines from ArcelorMittal, Ford, the Metropolitan Museum of Art, Portland State University, Blinkit, Barnes and Noble, and Kaiser Permanente. We follow up on last week's historic strike by 15,000 nurses in NYC. A recent piece in Dissent Magazine details the surge in the use of robots at Amazon and the harms born by workers. Also this week, we discuss the corrosive impact on working people of having a far right government using Nazi slogans in power. Join the discord: discord.gg/tDvmNzX  Follow the pod at instagram.com/workstoppage, @WorkStoppagePod on Twitter,  John @facebookvillain, and Lina @solidaritybee

Upgrade to the Premium Podcast Experience - https://rachelhollis.supercast.comDive even Deeper in the Coaching Community - Rachel Hollis CoachingCheck out Upcoming Live Events!!In this episode, Rachel Hollis discusses the importance of financial freedom and practical ways to earn a raise without burning out. She emphasizes setting a clear goal for a raise, having open conversations with managers early on, and improving the quality—not just quantity—of your work.Get your copy of Rachel's New Book Here: Audible, Amazon, Barnes & Noble, Books-A-Millon, Bookshop.org, or wherever books are sold!00:00 Introduction: Working Smarter, Not Harder00:57 Welcome to the Show: Life, Real Life01:37 The Importance of Financial Freedom03:26 Taking Ownership of Your Financial Future06:50 Seven Practical Ways to Get a Raise07:36 Decide That a Raise is Your Goal14:56 Have the Conversation Early22:10 Improve How You Work, Not Just How Hard You Work27:54 Invest in Yourself30:44 Track Your Wins Like an Athlete32:23 Expand Your Impact33:50 Act Like Someone Who Already Earns More38:26 Conclusion: Set the Intention to Earn More39:22 Closing Remarks and Upcoming EpisodesSign up for Rachel's weekly email: https://msrachelhollis.com/insider/Call the podcast hotline and leave a voicemail! Call (737) 400-4626Watch the podcast on YouTube: http://youtube.com/@MsRachelHollisFollow along on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/MsRachelHollisTo learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

281. Excel in Social Skills and Etiquette and Teach Your Children To Do The Same with Monica Irvine   Proverbs 20:11 NIV “Even small children are known by their actions, so is their conduct really pure and upright?”   Ephesians 4:32a AMP “Be kind and helpful to one another,”   *Transcription Below*   Monica Irvine, President and creator of The Etiquette Factory, LLC, is a master motivator and dedicated instructor who loves to help children and adults see the benefits and rewards of having proper etiquette, mastering professionalism and excelling in social skills. As a Certified Etiquette Instructor and working in the hospitality industry for 24 years, Mrs. Irvine specializes in etiquette and professional instruction to help ensure the success of each individual both personally and professionally.   Mrs. Irvine is the published author of three books on Etiquette and one book on Scheduling including: Etiquette for Beginners, Etiquette Intermediate, Etiquette Masters and A Schedule Makes for a Happy Family, in addition to authoring several monthly columns in national publications such as Everything Knoxville, The Homeschool Handbook and the Homeschool Magazine.   Mrs. Irvine is a national speaker, speaking to thousands of parents, educators and children every year.   Residing in Knoxville, TN with her husband, Mrs. Irvine spends her free time playing tennis, running and enjoying her family of three boys and a granddaughter.   You may contact Mrs. Irvine at monica@TheEtiquetteFactory.com  or via her website at www.TheEtiquetteFactory.com. Rise Up Parenting FUNdamentals 4 Kids Life Skills Essentials   Thank You to Our Sponsor: Sam Leman Eureka   Questions and Topics We Cover: What are some red flags we can identify in our lives if we are too busy and what wisdom do you recommend instead of our overstuffed schedules? As parents, why must we proactively teach these qualities to our children, rather than just instruct them in a moment of correction? Will you share stories of ways the Holy Spirit has nudged you to use etiquette and it resulted in something miraculous?    Other Savvy Sauce Episode Mentioned: Unexpected Grief and What Helped Me Through It Can Help You Too with Singer and Blogger, Brittany Price Brooker   Connect with The Savvy Sauce on Facebook or Instagram or Our Website   Gospel Scripture: (all NIV)   Romans 3:23 “for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God,”   Romans 3:24 “and are justified freely by his grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus.”   Romans 3:25 (a) “God presented him as a sacrifice of atonement, through faith in his blood.”    Hebrews 9:22 (b) “without the shedding of blood there is no forgiveness.”    Romans 5:8 “But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.”    Romans 5:11 “Not only is this so, but we also rejoice in God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have now received reconciliation.”    John 3:16 “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.”   Romans 10:9 “That if you confess with your mouth, “Jesus is Lord,” and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved.”    Luke 15:10 says “In the same way, I tell you, there is rejoicing in the presence of the angels of God over one sinner who repents.”   Romans 8:1 “Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus”   Ephesians 1:13–14 “And you also were included in Christ when you heard the word of truth, the gospel of your salvation. Having believed, you were marked in him with a seal, the promised Holy Spirit, who is a deposit guaranteeing our inheritance until the redemption of those who are God's possession- to the praise of his glory.”   Ephesians 1:15–23 “For this reason, ever since I heard about your faith in the Lord Jesus and your love for all the saints, I have not stopped giving thanks for you, remembering you in my prayers. I keep asking that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the glorious Father, may give you the spirit of wisdom and revelation, so that you may know him better. I pray also that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you, the riches of his glorious inheritance in the saints, and his incomparably great power for us who believe. That power is like the working of his mighty strength, which he exerted in Christ when he raised him from the dead and seated him at his right hand in the heavenly realms, far above all rule and authority, power and dominion, and every title that can be given, not only in the present age but also in the one to come. And God placed all things under his feet and appointed him to be head over everything for the church, which is his body, the fullness of him who fills everything in every way.”   Ephesians 2:8–10 “For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith – and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God – not by works, so that no one can boast. For we are God‘s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.“   Ephesians 2:13 “But now in Christ Jesus you who once were far away have been brought near through the blood of Christ.“   Philippians 1:6 “being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.”   *Transcription*   Music: (0:00 – 0:10)   Laura Dugger: (0:11 - 2:19) Welcome to The Savvy Sauce, where we have practical chats for intentional living. I'm your host, Laura Dugger, and I'm so glad you're here.   The principles of honesty and integrity that Sam Leman founded his business on continue today, over 55 years later, at Sam Leman Chevrolet Eureka. Owned and operated by the Burchie family, Sam Leman in Eureka appreciates the support they've received from their customers all over central Illinois and beyond. Visit them today at LemanGM.com.   My guest for today is the charming Monica Irvine. She is president and creator of The Etiquette Factory. She's a master motivator and dedicated instructor who just loves helping children and adults to see the benefits and rewards of having proper etiquette. She also loves to help people master professionalism and excel in social skills.   So, she's going to give us insight into all of these ideas and share stories today for ways that we can actually seek the Lord and love others well and value people through the proper use of etiquette.   Here's our chat. Welcome to The Savvy Sauce, Monica.   Monica Irvine: (2:19 - 2:20) Thank you. Thanks for having me, Laura.   Laura Dugger: (2:20 - 5:41) Well, I'm so excited to get a chat with you today, but let's just begin here. I'm so fascinated because you were born and raised in the South. Is that right?   Monica Irvine: Well, yes, Tennessee. Absolutely consider myself Southern.   Laura Dugger: I love it. And I grew up in the Midwest and got to live in the South for a few years. And I was very struck by the difference in manners. And I'm just curious if manners and etiquette were intentionally taught to you, both in your family and then just kind of in your Southern culture around you.   Monica Irvine: (2:20 - 5:32) Well, yes. So, when I think about being raised in the South, I think and maybe my mom and my grandmas were a little different. But what I would describe my upbringing is very particular, meaning everything was made special.   And my parents and my grandparents took a lot of pride in making things beautiful and lovely. And so, of course, my mom cooked every night. But like at my home growing up and we did not have a lot of money, just know that my parents struggled.   But my mother would never put a ketchup bottle on the table or a mayonnaise jar. Everything had to be put in little bowls with little spoons. And it's funny because my friends that I have today, I get given little spoons for birthdays and occasions because my friends all know how much I love little dainty things.   But, you know, and some people, you know, might think that's a little ridiculous. But I'll tell you something. I don't know that we need to eat that way every night, seven nights a week.   But it made dinner time feel special. And even the way my mother and my grandmothers kept their house, everything had its place. It was not messy.   We had clean homes. And I think it also just helped me be proud of my home. I mean, once again, we did not have a lot of money, but my friends thought my home was so nice.   Well, the reason it was so nice is because my mother kept such care of it. And so, I was raised with a lot of cousins and live close to both of my grandparents. And so even the outside of their homes, both sets of grandparents, everything was beautiful.   And so there was a lot of pride in who we are, how we presented ourselves. But you're going to laugh at this. So, my mom, my dad tells me this story that right after my mom and dad got married, my dad came home from work one day and my mom was ironing.   You know, she'd spend a whole day ironing every week or half a day. And my mom was ironing my dad's underwear. And my mom's name is Janice.   And he was like, “Janice, honey, what are you doing?” And “I know just ironing, Bob.” And he's like, “Babe, you don't need to iron my underwear.”   But, you know, the thing is, that to my mother and my grandmothers being a good wife and being a good mother meant making sure everyone in the family looked nice, that their clothes were clean, that the home was clean, that there was good food on the table. And that was part of their identity, of this is what it means to be a good wife and mother. And I love that about my upbringing.   Laura Dugger: (5:33 - 5:41) And do you have any reasons why you think that's changed a little bit over the years?   Monica Irvine: (5:42 - 8:34) Yeah, I think we've gotten lazy. Well, no, I just I think there you know, there's balance, right? There's when I look back, I can't really remember my mom playing with me.   But now, listen, I don't feel like I missed out, but I do recognize it. But I guess even as a little girl, sure, I would have loved my mom to play with me. But that's just not in my mind what moms did.   Moms cleaned house and made everything and cooked your meal. And so, I do. I'm grateful that as a society, we have adjusted somewhat.   Sometimes I believe too much but have adjusted in going. What's the most important things? And because I'm a big believer in playing with our children and our grandchildren and creating memories.   But now my family, my parents and we worked a lot together. Like if we were if the yard needed raking, it wasn't kids go rake the yard. Mom, dad, kids were in the yard raking.   If a car needed to be washed, it wasn't go wash the car. We were all out there washing the car. So, I think that's why I don't feel like I missed out because my family did so many things together.   Whereas today we're so separated. No parents give their children and babies phones and iPads so they'll just be quiet so they can get their important work done. Like grocery shopping or cooking.   And I just think that instead of teaching our children how to self-soothe and self-entertain and how to creatively play even by yourself, sometimes we just always believe there has to be a babysitter to distract our children from wanting mom and dad. It's just I you know, this could be a whole other talk, Laura, but I just you know, I see it. It breaks my heart sometimes on the lack of how often families work together, play together and do things together.   But now, you know, dad's watching his game in this room. Mom is in another room, maybe on her computer doing social media. The kids are in their rooms on their games.   And I see a lack of family unity. So once again, even though maybe my mom and dad didn't play with us and I'm glad we've shifted with that thought process. Still, we were a united family.   Laura Dugger: (8:35 - 8:56) I love that. And the Lord has clearly given you a passion for that instilling that in others. And He invited you into a journey that eventually led to The Etiquette Factory, which is the work that you get to do today.   So, can you share the impetus for that and what that journey looked like for you?   Monica Irvine: (8:56 - 13:54) I will. I love my company. I feel like it's just yet another beautiful adventure the Lord has allowed me to be on in my life.   And so, I feel like I'm just outside looking in at this beautiful little business that has allowed me to minister to children and adults in need. So, years ago, I was homeschooling our kids. I was homeschooling our youngest son at the time, and we were studying the life of President George Washington.   And I just kind of stumbled upon this list. It was called George Washington's Rules of Civility and Decent Behavior. It is a beautiful list of 110 chivalry skills.   And apparently, President Washington was encouraged to focus on some chivalry as was part of a formal education in those days. He found a French book that had these list of chivalry kind of considerations, and he copied them. He hand copied them, of course.   And we have that list of 110 chivalry skills in President Washington's handwriting. But as I started reading over this list, the Lord penetrated my heart. I just I was like, these are so beautiful.   I mean, some of them were kind of funny. Some of them were. It's not polite to remove lice from your companion in public, which I think is good to know.   But most of the beautiful chivalry skills were very applicable to today. And I was like I want my son to memorize these skills. So, we started memorizing one Washington skill a week.   And because they were written in that old English, you know, sometimes we were like, what does this mean? And it just I just decided for my son's sake, who was nine at the time, I wanted to just kind of make my own version. But what was so a light bulb moment for me is as we started making manners part of our daily discussion in school, I noticed a change in my child's behavior and my son would be like, “Mom, let's do another one. What's the next one? Let's do one more.”   And I found that so fascinating because, as you know, most of us parents, when we teach manners, we're teaching it in the moment, usually correcting bad behavior. It's not that that's our goal. It's just that that's when we think about it.   Our child says, or does something that's not the most polite, and all of a sudden we're going, “Oh, honey, no, honey, you can't say that. That's not polite.” And then we make the correction and then we teach the skill.   And what I learned and realized is that so often that's when I was teaching my children manners in the moment of correcting. And what I've learned about that is when we're being corrected, whether you're three years old or 30 years old, we harden our heart typically because it's self-preservation. You know, we stiffen up when someone's like, “Monica, you really shouldn't have.” I'm like, whoa.   And it's just because of our own pride. We don't like being called out and neither do our children, even when we're doing it gently and politely. It's still a correction.   And so, what I found is when our heart is hardened, as the scripture says, it's not the best time to absorb information. It's the opposite of being humble. To be humble means to be teachable.   To be hardened means to not be teachable. So, when we have a hardened heart, it's hard for us to absorb things of the spirit, which all truth comes from God. So, anything that is lovely of good rapport is of God.   So, when we're teaching our children to be kind and to have kind considerations for others, those are God's truths and God's truths cannot seep into the soul of our heart unless our heart is soft. And so that is what happened is I was like, today we're going to learn how to use our napkin properly. Or today we're going to learn how to apologize.   But how do you make it sound sincere and how do you be sincere when you don't really feel it? And so, as we started just working on one skill at a time, the conversations were typically beautiful. Parts were changed and behavior ended up changing.   And so really, that's what then later became The Etiquette Factory.   Laura Dugger: (13:55 - 14:20) I love that because I think it gives our children confidence because then they're equipped and prepared and understand what's expected of them in different situations or what can bless others in the way they act. But then I'm curious, you gave a few examples of those. Can you think of any of George Washington's chivalry lines that would still apply today?   Monica Irvine: (14:21 - 19:07) Yes, well, so I'm not quoting, I'm summarizing. So, for instance, one is it is not polite to hum or sing in the presence of others that would cause distraction. And so basically it's not polite to draw attention to ourselves but also draw attention or interrupt other people's day life when we haven't been invited to do so.   So let me give you this definition we use for etiquette. So, at The Etiquette Factory, etiquette is helping those around us to feel valued and to feel comfortable. Well, if I'm sitting there humming along, but the person beside me really doesn't want to hear my humming, then I might be causing that person to feel uncomfortable.   Same thing, you know, whenever I start off teaching a class, because usually when everyone thinks of manners, they think of table manners. Of course, there's so much more. But I use this example.   I say, well, if I were to come to your home and sit down and I started eating like a pig in the presence of your family, I mean, I'm chewing with my mouth open. I'm making a smacking my lips. I'm taking too big of bites and food is falling in my lap or I'm making a mess on the table.   Or I eat so fast that I am finished eating, getting up to leave. And you're just on your third bite of food. Well, any of those behaviors, I would be sending a message.   And that message is, look, I'm here for one person and that person is myself. I came to fill up my belly because I'm hungry. And beyond that, I really don't care.   I don't care if I'm making you uncomfortable. I don't care if I'm grossing you out. I don't care if you actually wanted to talk to me because I just came here to eat and I'm out of here.   You see, we don't realize it, but a lack of chivalry is called selfishness. A lack of chivalry is inward focused. When we focus outwardly on what message am I sending to those around me?   Am I sending a message of love and care and value? That is etiquette. I get emailed all the time and message like, “OK, Monica, I've got this shower I'm putting on.   And my daughter is not going to invite her work friends to the wedding. But is it OK if we invite all of them to a wedding shower?” And they'll go, so what's the etiquette rule?   Well, there is no etiquette rule about that, except etiquette is about helping those around us to feel valued. And so that's how I answer every question. I'm like, well, let me ask you if you were invited to a wedding shower, where you're asking her friends to shower your daughter with gifts and love to celebrate her wedding.   But yet those friends were not valued enough to invite to the wedding. How do you think it would make them feel? And so that's what the answer is with etiquette.   Now, there's exceptions. In fact, that case, that's a real email I got. And she ended up having the shower because her daughter went and told her co-worker who offered to give her a wedding shower.   “You know what? I thought that is so thoughtful. I'm so grateful that you were willing to do that. But we're having a very small, intimate wedding, you know, for financial reasons and intimacy reasons. And so, I just don't feel comfortable inviting people to bring gifts for me and knowing that we're just we're not going to be able to invite everyone to the wedding.”   And that co-worker said, “We don't care. We knew you were having a small wedding. We want to celebrate you.”   And so, you know, you can there be exceptions, but a lady and a gentleman always try to be very aware of those unspoken messages. And that guides our conversation, our answers, our actions. And that's what we teach children and adults to do at The Etiquette Factory.   Laura Dugger: (19:07 - 21:17) And now a brief message from our sponsor.   Sam Leman Chevrolet Eureka has been owned and operated by the Burchie family for over 25 years. 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Your car buying process doesn't have to be something you dread, so come see for yourself at Sam Leman Chevrolet in Eureka. Sam and Stephen would love to see you, and they appreciate your business.   Learn more at their website, LemanEureka.com, or visit them on Facebook  by searching for Sam Leman Eureka. You can also call them at 309-467-2351. Thanks for your sponsorship.   I loved, this was a few months back, but we came to a homeschool convention, and I loved your talk on purposeful parenting. One thing that you said, just I think backing it up and looking at our family in general, you said, “If we're too busy to do the most important things, we're too busy. Stop allowing the adversary to tempt us to remain too busy.”   So, Monica, what wisdom can you share for maybe red flags that can help us identify when we're too busy to focus on the most important things, and what do you recommend instead of overstuffing our schedules and our lives?   Monica Irvine: (21:18 - 26:23) You know, that's a great question. Those are good questions that every family should ask themselves. You know, I think that if we are to strive to focus on the most important things, step number one is, has mom and dad identified the most important things?   Because if you don't know what your goal is, then you're not going to as easily recognize when something is interfering with your goal. So, for instance, maybe mom and dad sits down and says, “Well, our number one goal is to make sure that our children know Jesus Christ. And so, what do we need to do to make sure that we're doing our best to help our children know who He is?”   Well, and so a family might decide, well, we want to have daily scripture study and daily family and individual prayer. We want to make it a priority to be at church so that we can worship on the Sabbath, but also so that we can meet together with other like-minded Christians and minister to one another as we're taught by the Savior. That's important for us to do.   And perhaps we want to learn to do as the Savior does. And that's why we're going to learn of His attributes and try to follow in His footsteps and be a family of service. So, let's just say those are our four of the most important things.   If that's our goal, then hopefully mom and dad could recognize when we're starting to stumble off the path that leads to our goal. For instance, I can't tell you how many parents have come up to me after they hear me speak on this topic and say, “Monica, I wish I had heard you say this 10 years ago. But we got sucked up into the what the world has to offer, and we started allowing our children to play competitive sports on Sunday. And so, we stopped going to church years ago because there was always a championship game on Sunday morning and always another tournament. And we wanted our children to have, you know, college opportunities.”   And there's nothing wrong with college opportunities unless that college opportunity interferes with our most important goal. And so that's why first mom and dad have to decide what is the most important, because then it's easier to recognize when we are being tempted by the adversary to focus on what the world is trying to offer us.   And the world offers us shiny things that tempt our human nature to want to be popular and loved by all and wealthy. And so, we just have to always go back to our goals. You know, I've got families that say, “I wish we had eaten dinner together more often. But we allowed our children to be so scheduled that there was not one night or there was only one night a week that we actually sat down at the table together.”   You know, parents. You will regret that. And you can't take back these precious, very short years that you have your children under your roof in your home.   And you will be someone like me one day where all of my kids are graduating and grandchildren and all you live for is your children to come visit and your children to come have dinner. And so, when you allow the world to creep in and be more important than spending time with your family, time with the Lord, time on good and lovely things, you will regret it. And I just think that probably every year come January, mom and dad should sit down and go, let's look at last year.   What were we missing from our family schedule? What do we need to reevaluate whether that is the most important thing? And so that's something I think all of us have to do on a regular basis.   Laura Dugger: (26:24 - 27:20) I think you're hitting on something profound there, that reflection with the Lord or with our spouse. I think we have no excuse because if there is no spouse in the picture, we always have the Lord. But to be intentional, to take that time, maybe on a Sabbath and go through a few questions and reflect back.   I think that could save us from a lot of regret. So, I really appreciate that response. And going back to etiquette, then you've taught us that it is a learned behavior.   This isn't something that our children will just naturally pick up. It's best to do in times where their hearts are soft, so proactive if possible. But I'd love to know in your own life, when were times that the Holy Spirit nudged you to use etiquette and it resulted in something miraculous?   Monica Irvine: (27:21 - 32:56) Oh, goodness. Okay, well, to me, I think miraculous is seeing the Lord's divine hand in our life. I see the miracle of the Lord every day in my life.   But probably most often is when I kneel down at the end of a day, I repent daily because I need to daily. And it's always a little nervous because I pray and I ask the Lord, as sometimes I know what I need to repent of. I know that I recognized I stumbled that day on something, but sometimes I just I pray and I say, “Lord, you know, just help.”   If something needs to be brought to my mind that I need to repent of and that I need to do better, would you bring it to my mind at this time? And it wasn't that long ago that the Lord brought to my mind something that I had gotten in the habit of doing that I didn't feel like it was wrong, but it was wrong. And so, etiquette, one of the etiquette skills I teach everyone is that it's not polite for us to gossip.   A lady and a gentleman always draw attention to the lovely and wonderful things that other people do. Now, if there's a safety issue, that's different, but I'm just talking about we don't share negative things about other people. And so, it's something I teach every year, all year long.   But I feel like I've done so much better than I did twenty-five years ago when the Lord really chastised me one time for gossiping. But in the last couple of months, I had gotten in the habit of sharing with my husband. So sometimes, you know, when you share with your spouse that you kind of feel like that's a safe place that the same rules don't apply because you and your spouse kind of talk about everything.   And so, I was in the habit of sharing with my spouse something that I was worried about that another person in our family did. But I was constantly going, “Oh, I don't like that. They do this and I don't like that. They do this and I'm worried about it.” And I actually was worried about it. But I just was constantly kind of highlighting these things that I didn't like that someone in our family did.   Well, one night I was praying and asked the Lord to bring to my mind and the Lord brought that to my mind. And it was kind of like he said, “Monica, don't you remember that? If you're worried about someone. Instead of sharing those negative things, even with Charles, my husband, what would be more effective is if you prayed and asked me to bless that person, to help that person, you know, in the ways that they need help and ask me to help, you know, of ways that you could be a better example to that person. But you don't need to constantly draw attention because it's starting to make you be negative towards this person.”   And I just like right when the Lord said that to me, I was embarrassed. I was like, “Monica, that. Yeah. Like, how do you not know that? That you should know better than that.”   Well, so immediately I repented and I apologized to the Lord and I and I started doing what he asked me to do. And within just a couple of days, like I started just noticing all of the wonderful, lovely things that this person is and does. And so, just to me, that is miraculous and it happens all the time.   And if I'm humble enough to repent and to listen to the Lord, because the Lord wants to help us and he wants us to strive to be like him. But we've got to ask where we need to be corrected. And so, I teach etiquette, I teach we don't gossip.   And then lo and behold, I had kind of gotten myself in another trap again. You know, and I just I think it's a miracle what happens when we listen to the Lord. He immediately turns our mind to good, lovely, beautiful things and allows us to be a vessel of light instead of vessel of darkness.   And we can be that vessel of darkness just right inside our own marriage, even though we think that's kind of a safe place to maybe be a little looser with our tongue. So, there's one example.   Laura Dugger: (32:57 - 33:26) I love that. And I remember you also explaining whenever you get a thought in your head that you don't want to do, it's likely 100 percent from God. So, can you share a couple specific stories of times that that was the Holy Spirit telling you something that you didn't maybe want to do, but you obeyed?   I'm remembering something about a grocery store and another time separately about a phone call. Yeah.   Monica Irvine: (33:26 - 40:29) OK, well, I'll tell about the phone call just because it's less sad. So, yeah, one time there was this lady and she was just kind of investigating our church and starting to come to our church and kind of fill it out. So, I had just met her and I found out that her what led her to come looking for God is her husband was an addict and she was just at her wits end and their marriage and family was falling apart.   And so, she came looking for the for help for the Lord. And so, I learned a little bit about her story. I ended up taking her to one of those celebrate recovery places at another church because I knew they had a wonderful program.   And so, I had interacted with her a couple of times. I probably had only known her about a month when one night I was running late to take my kids to youth on Wednesday night and I was cooking some spaghetti and I was just, you know, cooking that spaghetti at the stove. And all of a sudden I had a thought come into my mind, “Call her.”   And, you know, I was like, oh, yeah, I do need to call her. I need to call and check on her. I will, you know, after church tonight.   And so, I, you know, kept cooking that spaghetti. And the second time the Spirit, because that's who it was talking to me, because that's who tells us to do good things. Not us, but God.   The Spirit said, “Monica, call her.” But I was running late and I was trying to get my kids fed and I was like, I will call her as soon as I get the kids fed, you know, drop them off at church and then I'll call her, you know, and so I really meant to call her. But I.   Finally, a third time, and it seems to always take me three times before I realize, OK, he means now. And so, a third time it was like “Monica call.” And so, it was so strong.   And I, I know it's the Lord, but I, I just turned the stove off. I went into my bedroom, got my phone out, dialed her number. And as it was ringing, she picked up the phone and all I heard was just some quiet sobbing.   And she couldn't speak. And I, you know, I said her name. I said, “Hey, so and so it's Monica. I just. I see that you're upset. I just wanted to call and check on you. In fact, the Lord insisted that I call and check on you.”   And then her, you know, her crying just continued. It wasn't until, you know, she had calmed down and she just said, you know, “Monica, I had been praying and just asking the Lord to just show me that, you know, show me that you care that this is happening to me.” Something like that.   And, you know, I, I, in that moment, my stomach kind of did that little knot because I knew how close I had come to just not calling. And sure, I could have called her an hour later. It would have been at least an hour later and maybe, you know, it would have mattered.   But the Lord knew that it mattered right in that moment. She needed an answer. She needed to know that the Lord was listening.   And I've learned that in my life, that whenever we get a thought that comes into our mind and that thought is to do something good, like calling someone, you all is a good thing. Visiting someone, writing a letter to someone. Those are good things.   And all good comes from the Lord. And sometimes I wonder, does the Lord trust me? Does he know I'll respond when the stakes are high?   You know, sometimes I think as we continue to learn how to hear the spirit, we have to practice. Oh, that was the spirit. And probably if you're like me, I've learned a lot about the spirit by not listening.   And then later going, “Oh, yeah, Lord, I did miss that. You tried. You tried to warn me, or you tried to get me to do that. And I dismissed it.”   But so, you all I just think it takes practice and I'm still practicing. But I do believe that especially when it's something that we don't really want to do or we think we don't have time. And I just realize I felt the Lord going, “Monica, do you not think I know you're cooking spaghetti? Do you not think I know you're running late? But right now, there's something more important I need you to do than to get your kids to church on time.”   And so, I think at some point we have to decide, do we trust Him or don't we? And if we trust Him, we have to trust Him completely. And that means when we receive a prompting that we will act quickly because the Lord knows what we're doing.   And He knows that we don't have the best relationship with that person. Yet you're feeling like you should call. He already knows that.   And it doesn't mean that everything's always going to turn out the way we think it will. Sometimes I think the Lord just wants us to know ourselves that we'll do what He asked us to do, regardless of how it will turn out. And sometimes I feel like the Lord has told me to do something and I did it and it didn't go well.   And I'm like, “Lord, like, why? Why?” And I know all of us, you all sit there and go, wait, was that my thought or was it God's thought?   And you know what I have learned is that just stop worrying about it. Just act in faith. And the Lord always backs up His people.   The Lord doesn't, as you and I are praying and striving to understand the Lord's will. And let's say we get an idea and so we act on it because we feel like it was a prompting and then it does not go well. I believe the Lord loves so much that you were trying to listen and be obedient and the blessings will come.   Sometimes we just don't know the timing or how, but we've just got to trust.   Laura Dugger: (40:29 - 43:59) I love that. And we never know what's happening on the other side of our obedience. And I'll link back to Brittany Price Brooker's episode because she was one who had lost her husband and was crying out to the Lord.   I think she was bathing her young children, and they didn't have food in the house and maybe they were sick. And the only thing that sounded good to their child was apples, but it was late at night. She couldn't go get them herself.   And she was just praying like, “Lord, do You see me? Do You know my needs? I need You to meet my needs.”   And right then the doorbell rings and somebody showed up and she said, “The Lord told me to buy you these apples and bring them to you.” And I think that highlights something else. You articulated it well when you say whenever you get that thought in your head that you something that you don't want to do, it's likely 100% from God.   I would say a lot of times too, it's also awkward or inconvenient. We don't know why. And then I think back to the Bible, Abraham was put in a very awkward situation with his son and Noah, that was very awkward to be building the boat when there wasn't rain.   But look at the blessing that comes on the other side of obedience. So, appreciate those stories are really helpful.   By now, I hope you've checked out our updated website, thesavvysauce.com, so that you can have access to all the additional freebies we are offering, including all of our previous articles and all of our previous episodes, which now include transcriptions. You will be equipped to have your own practical chats for intentional living when you read all the recommended questions in the articles or gain insight from expert guests and past episodes as you read through the transcriptions. Because many people have shared with us that they want to take notes on previous episodes, or maybe their spouse prefers to read our conversations rather than listen to them or watch them now that we're offering video rather than just audio. So, we heard all of that and we now have provided transcripts for all our episodes.   Just visit thesavvysauce.com. All of this is conveniently located under the tab show notes on our website. Happy reading.   So, at that same conference, when I heard you speak, you shared something that really stuck with me. This one was about our daughters. So, I want to talk about daughters first and then we'll move to sons.   But you mentioned there was this one study where over 3,000 men were surveyed. And they were asked, what's the number one quality that you desire in your wife? Either current wife or someday in the future when you're married.   And do you remember the response? Yeah, it was kindness. Kindness.   That she is kind. And so, I wondered, was there another side for the boys then too? What do you think women would say for their future or their current spouse?   What attribute do you think they would identify?   Monica Irvine: (44:00 - 47:35) It didn't have that for the other side, but a word that we don't use as much anymore. And I try to use it a lot is, I think most women, even if it wouldn't come to their mind immediately, once they heard it, they'd be like, oh, wait, no, yeah, that. And that is honorable.   They would want their husbands to be honorable. And to be honorable means that we do honorable things. And honorable things always 100 percent of the time require some level of sacrifice.   That's what makes them honorable when we sacrifice and give up our time, ourself in order to better someone else to help our country, our family, others. And so, I think today what we all want is for our spouses, husbands and wives to be kind and to live honorable lives. Those lives, it doesn't mean a perfect life, but to be honorable means we strive to have integrity.   We strive to be godly. We strive to do what we say we're going to do. We strive to live up to our divine nature as God called mothers and fathers and husbands.   And so, I would think to me that is the most important, because if you live an honorable life, then you honor God. You honor your marriage covenant. You honor your children by treating them and speaking to them with honor.   You honor your job. You make sure that you have integrity at work and that you're dependable. And the same goes for us women.   You know, but I think I think we all struggle with selfishness. I mean, that is ultimately what we struggle with every day is what do I want? What do I need?   What's important to me versus trying to live a selfless life for our spouse, for our family? Anyway, it would be interesting to do that survey, but I think what's so kind of funny about the kindness is that whenever I read that survey results that I had read years ago, when I say that to a crowd of women. And men, but when I say that to the crowd, you can always see I just see this rippling of women making this kind of gesture.   Or because they know that they could be more kind, because usually we can be kind to everyone in the world. But in the walls of our home, we struggle more with just kindness.   Laura Dugger: (47:37 - 48:00) And so if we go further upstream than before we're married, if that's what God has for us, what are practical ways that we can teach and instill kindness in our children and honorable character? Or any other practical tips for conduct?   Monica Irvine: (48:00 - 53:03) Yeah, well, I love when I do a workshop at a convention on a family of service, because honestly, when we have our children in our home, it's practice ground. We have once again a few years to help them learn to love the Lord and to love others. You know, the two great commandments, love me and love others.   Well, to me, the best way to teach our children to love God and love others is to get our children out and serving others. Because, as you know, typically, like, for instance, when someone calls us and says, “Oh, hey, Monica, hey, would you mind, you know, the Smith family, they just had their new baby. Do you think you could cook dinner for them one night next week?”   If you're like me, I'm going to say yes. And then I'm going to hang up. And then I'm going to have that anxiety because already my week is so full and I was already stressed out about how I was going to get all the things done I needed to get done.   And now I've just added another thing. And I'm not saying there are not times that we don't need to say no, because we absolutely have to say no sometimes. But my point is, I cook the dinner and I go drop it off.   And as I'm pulling, as we are pulling away from that home, how do we feel? Do we feel better or do we feel worse? Do we feel happy or do we feel sad?   Honestly, almost 100 percent of the time, y'all, we're going to feel happier. We're going to feel grateful. We're going to be grateful that we had the opportunity to cook that dinner for that sweet family.   We're going to be reminded of how sweet the Lord is to give us opportunities to be His hands and His feet and His mouth here on the earth. And so, we want our children to learn to love. To love others, but it takes practice.   It's not until you serve again and again and again that you start to realize that the secret to being happy, the secret to having peace in your life and love abounding in your home is when we lose ourselves in the service of others. It's the secret to fixing siblings arguing with each other. It's the secret to helping husbands and wives draw closer together and have more love for one another.   It's the secret to less contention overall, to more peace, to more joy and happiness is to lose ourselves in the service of others. And so, to me, if you want to raise if we want to raise honorable, kind, generous, compassionate, empathetic human beings, they've got to lose themselves. To find themselves and define God.   And so, yeah, I think that's the secret. And of course, Jesus Christ tried to teach us that over and over and over again. He tried to teach His disciples over and over again that if you love me.   Then love my sheep, feed my sheep, teach my sheep. And what's interesting is that you all. The more we do that, the more we serve and love others.   Do you know what I believe? I believe it's kind of like the Grinch. Remember when the Grinch's heart grew?   That's real. That's really what happens. The God expands our ability to love others.   And in doing that, it actually expands our deep love of God. I think it's so fascinating that that's the fruit of service is a deeper and abiding love of Jesus Christ. It seems like it would be the opposite, right?   Well, I've got to love Jesus more in order to have a greater desire to serve. But it's the opposite. He wants you to go serve when you don't really feel like it.   And he wants you to go serve when it's not convenient. And your kids are crying and no one wants to go rake her yard. And then the fruit of acting in faith and trusting God is the love.   Laura Dugger: (53:05 - 53:34) That's what I would do. That's so good. Such a good medicine or anecdote to selfishness and issues we're having in the home with our children and for ourselves.   Well, Monica, you have shared so much goodness with us throughout this conversation. Can you explain how you can help partner with us as parents to help us teach our children etiquette at neutral times? Like you said, when their hearts are softer?   Monica Irvine: (53:35 - 56:52) Yes. Yeah. So, we've got some awesome resources, parents.   And number one is we do have a parenting course called Rise Up Parenting. And it's just this beautiful 52-week course that you get lifetime access to in case it takes you three years to get through your 52 weeks. But it is a course for mom and dad, or mom, or dad by themselves.   But it's just a beautiful way to help parents focus on one parenting skill a week. I've learned that when we have purposeful parenting, when we focus on one improvement at a time because we can get so overwhelmed, like we want we want to teach our kids to be selfless and that be ambitious and to serve and share. And I mean, it's just, it's endless.   But the Lord is a house of order. The gospel of Jesus Christ is a house of order. And so as long as we're going in the right direction, y'all, we are successful.   And so, this parenting course teaches a biblical principle and then a parenting principle that are related and allows you to just make little increment steps of improvement. Because when mom and dad improve, it blesses your children. So that's the first resource.   And then the other two most popular resources is we just have two programs. We have a program called FUNdamentals4Kids that targets children preschool through about third grade. And it's so fun.   It's just these wonderful, fun board games, flashcards, songs, stories, crafts, where we try to encourage you to twice a week set aside 15 minutes of your school day for an official manners activity and watch what happens. So, we've organized it for you. And for the little kids, we found out that if they can play with it, sing about it, make some food with it, that it helps them to go, “Mom, let's do a manners lesson.”   And then they don't even know that they're being taught these beautiful, wonderful skills. So that is so wonderful. And then for kids about fourth grade through 12th grade, we have a course called Life Skills for You.   And it's just so fun and it's so effective. Basically, it's 142 little three-minute lessons. We once again just try to get you to commit to twice a week sitting down with your family, watching a three-minute lesson where I'm teaching the etiquette skill.   Plus, we show teenagers doing the skill the wrong way and the right way. So, it's kind of funny, but it just creates some really great conversation with the family. And so those are our top three selling product lines.   And you can find all of that on our website, theetiquettefactory.com.   Laura Dugger: (56:53 - 57:15) Thank you for sharing. We will certainly link to all of that in the show notes for today's episode. And Monica, you may be familiar that we are called The Savvy Sauce because savvy is synonymous with practical knowledge.   And so, this is my final question for you today. What is your savvy sauce? Yeah.   Oh, that's a hard one.   Monica Irvine: (57:15 - 59:06) I thought about this and I'm like, it's so hard. You all. Honestly, my savvy sauce is Jesus Christ.   It just is. I know sometimes we want the answer to be something else, but in all practical terms, it's Jesus. Meaning I start my morning out every day with Jesus.   I end every night with Jesus. I pray throughout the day and ask Him to help me make a decision. And I thank Him for all the beautiful things that happened to me throughout the day.   And I just He is this person, this real person that is at my side every day, all day, I hope. And that's how I do anything. That's why I am the mother that I am.   Not that I'm the best mother, but because of Him, I can mother and because of Him, I can be a good wife. And because of Him, I can be a good friend and I can minister to others through The Etiquette Factory. It's just it is Him.   And, you know, sometimes people will ask me, “Monica, I I want to have the knowledge you have or I want to be able to whatever parent the way it sounds like you parent.” And I'm like, you guys know, it's just it's called Jesus Christ. And Jesus will tell us all things that we should do.   And so my sauce is having a relationship with Jesus Christ. It truly is well said.   Laura Dugger: (59:06 - 59:24) And, Monica, you are such a gifted communicator and your heart of compassion is evident in your outward behavior. It's been such a joy to get to spend an hour with you today. So, I just want to say thank you for being my guest.   Monica Irvine: (59:24 - 59:43) Oh, thank you, Laura. And it's been such a joy. You're so kind.   And I appreciate the beautiful ministry that you're doing here on The Savvy Sauce. What a blessing for families to be able to just hear these resources that you've created. So, thank you.   Laura Dugger: (59:44 - 1:03:26) Thank you for being a part of it.   One more thing before you go, have you heard the term gospel before? It simply means good news. And I want to share the best news with you, but it starts with the bad news.   Every single one of us were born sinners, but Christ desires to rescue us from our sin, which is something we cannot do for ourselves. This means there's absolutely no chance we can make it to heaven on our own. So, for you and for me, it means we deserve death, and we can never pay back the sacrifice we owe to be saved.   We need a savior, but God loved us so much. He made a way for his only son to willingly die in our place as the perfect substitute. This gives us hope of life forever in right relationship with him.   That is good news. Jesus lived the perfect life. We could never live and died in our place for our sin.   This was God's plan to make a way to reconcile with us so that God can look at us and see Jesus. We can be covered and justified through the work Jesus finished. If we choose to receive what he has done for us, Romans 10:9 says, “that if you confess with your mouth, Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved.”   So, you pray with me now. Heavenly father, thank you for sending Jesus to take our place. I pray someone today right now is touched and chooses to turn their life over to you.   Will you clearly guide them and help them take their next step in faith to declare you as Lord of their life? We trust you to work and change lives now for eternity. In Jesus name we pray.   Amen. If you prayed that prayer, you are declaring him for me. So, me for him, you get the opportunity to live your life for him.   And at this podcast, we're called The Savvy Sauce for a reason. We want to give you practical tools to implement the knowledge you have learned. So, you're ready to get started.   First, tell someone, say it out loud, get a Bible. The first day I made this decision, my parents took me to Barnes and Noble and let me choose my own Bible. I selected the Quest NIV Bible and I love it.   You can start by reading the book of John. Also get connected locally, which just means tell someone who's a part of a church in your community that you made a decision to follow Christ. I'm assuming they will be thrilled to talk with you about further steps such as going to church and getting connected to other believers to encourage you.   We want to celebrate with you too. So, feel free to leave a comment for us here. If you did make a decision to follow Christ, we also have show notes included where you can read scripture that describes this process.   And finally, be encouraged. Luke 15:10 says, “in the same way, I tell you, there is rejoicing in the presence of the angels of God over one sinner who repents.” The heavens are praising with you for your decision today.   And if you've already received this good news, I pray you have someone to share it with. You are loved and I look forward to meeting you here next time.

So many high-achieving women have mastered strategy, performance, and resilience—yet still feel disconnected from their power, caught in patterns that no longer serve them, or driven by identities they've outgrown. True feminine power doesn't come from doing more or pushing harder; it comes from clarity, self-leadership, and the ability to consciously choose how we show up in the world.   In this powerful episode of The Art of Feminine Negotiation, Cindy Watson sits down with Riana Malia to explore Identity, Self-Leadership, and the Neuroscience Behind Feminine Power. Riana Malia is an Identity Architect for High-Achieving Women™, a sought-after speaker, and the visionary creator of the Clear to Create™ Method and Quantum Pattern Protocol™—two transformative frameworks that have helped hundreds of women clear emotional residue, rewire subconscious patterns, and reclaim the love, life, and legacy they were always meant to live. Named one of NY Weekly's Top 30 Empowering Women Entrepreneurs to Watch in 2025, Riana brings a unique blend of neuroscience, identity work, and feminine leadership to the conversation. Together, Cindy and Riana unpack how understanding who you truly are—and how your brain is wired—can radically shift the way you lead, negotiate, and show up in every area of your life. If you're ready to step into deeper self-leadership and harness the science-backed power of your feminine identity, this is an episode you won't want to miss. Together, we unpack: What are the identity levels? The connection between neuroscience, somatics, and feminine power and leadership? How does reframing our self view can change how we negotiate our best life, negotiate success, self-worth, and love. How does somatic and subconscious reprograming can fill the gap? 72 hour transformational process What is Extraordinary Love Index or ELI? And many more! Learn more about Riana Malia: Website: rianamalia.com Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/RianaMalia Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/rianamalia/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/rianamalia/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@rianamalia If you're looking to up-level your negotiation skills, I have everything from online to group to my signature one-on-one mastermind & VIP experiences available to help you better leverage your innate power to get more of what you want and deserve in life. Check out our website at www.artofFeminineNegotiation.com if that sounds interesting to you.   Get Cindy's book here: Amazon   https://www.amazon.com/Art-Feminine-Negotiation-Boardroom-Bedroom-ebook/dp/B0B8KPCYZP?inf_contact_key=94d07c699eea186d2adfbddfef6fb9e2&inf_contact_key=013613337189d4d12be8d2bca3c26821680f8914173f9191b1c0223e68310bb1 EBook   https://www.amazon.com/Art-Feminine-Negotiation-Boardroom-Bedroom-ebook/dp/B0B8KPCYZP?inf_contact_key=94d07c699eea186d2adfbddfef6fb9e2&inf_contact_key=013613337189d4d12be8d2bca3c26821680f8914173f9191b1c0223e68310bb1 Barnes and Noble   https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/the-art-of-feminine-negotiation-cindy-watson/1141499614?ean=9781631959776 CONNECT WITH CINDY: Website: www.womenonpurpose.ca Website: www.practicingwithpurpose.org Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/womenonpurposecommunity/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/womenonpurposecoaching/ LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/thecindywatson Show: https://www.womenonpurpose.ca/media/podcast-2/ X(Twitter):  https://twitter.com/womenonpurpose1 YouTube:https://www.youtube.com/@hersuasion Email: cindy@womenonpurpose.ca

This is the full episode interview with Monica Stahlmann, who also writes under the pen name Leokadia George.Monica is a children's book author, mental health therapist, and volunteer at the Wolf Conservation Center. In this conversation, we sit with wolves, story, family, and the deeper threads that connect us to nature and each other.We talk about Trumpet, a critically endangered Mexican gray wolf known as F1 1505, and how her story inspired a children's book series rooted in honesty, care, and respect for wild animals. Monica shares why early storytelling matters, how fear around wolves is often learned, and what it looks like to offer children a different first story.We also explore conservation, dialogue in polarized spaces, ancestry, wildness, and why being close to nature can feel so grounding. This conversation is thoughtful, gentle, and full of heart.Key Takeaways• Wolves live as families, much like we do• Stories shape how fear or understanding takes root• Dialogue opens space for shared solutionsReflection and ActionWhat story about nature are you ready to see differently?Spend a few quiet moments outside this week and notice what settlesResources and LinksEmail: leokadiageorge.books@gmail.com. Wolf Conservation Center and live webcamshttps://nywolf.orgFB: https://www.facebook.com/nywolforgX: https://x.com/nywolforgYouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC7pgxuIaHyodYW0kDD27-dwIG: https://www.instagram.com/wolfconservationcenter/Trumpet The Miracle Wolf Pup: https://a.co/d/0RIBa3hMonica's books are available through Amazon, Barnes and Noble online, independent bookstores, libraries, and the Wolf Conservation Center store.Send us a text Support the show✨ Join My TEDx Spokane Journey! Get early updates, BTS moments, and reflections as I prep for TEDx Spokane.

Upgrade to the Premium Podcast Experience - https://rachelhollis.supercast.comDive even Deeper in the Coaching Community - Rachel Hollis CoachingCheck out Upcoming Live Events!!In this episode of The Rachel Hollis Podcast, Rachel Hollis addresses the pervasive issue of comparison, emphasizing its detrimental impact on joy and fulfillment. She discusses how societal norms and expectations often trap women into a cycle of achievement that never truly satisfies. Rachel encourages listeners to focus on their internal happiness rather than external milestones and offers several mindset shifts to help break free from the comparison game.Get your copy of Rachel's New Book Here: Audible, Amazon, Barnes & Noble, Books-A-Millon, Bookshop.org, or wherever books are sold!01:00 Welcome to the Podcast01:31 The Comparison Trap03:42 Mindset Shift: Stop Using Milestones as Proof of Happiness05:53 Personal Anecdote: The Perfect Life Illusion09:55 Mindset Shift: Embrace Your Own Path14:24 Mindset Shift: Understand Your Season19:11 Mindset Shift: Success is Direction, Not Speed28:46 Mindset Shift: Shrink the Timeline36:16 Conclusion: Focus on Your Own JourneySign up for Rachel's weekly email: https://msrachelhollis.com/insider/Call the podcast hotline and leave a voicemail! Call (737) 400-4626Watch the podcast on YouTube: http://youtube.com/@MsRachelHollisFollow along on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/MsRachelHollisTo learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Upgrade to the Premium Podcast Experience - https://rachelhollis.supercast.comDive even Deeper in the Coaching Community - Rachel Hollis CoachingIn this episode of the podcast, Rachel Hollis emphasizes that while motivation is fleeting, it's the small, consistent habits that lead to lasting change. She discusses the myth that motivation alone can sustain personal growth and highlights the necessity of creating systems and processes to maintain progress. Rachel introduces three key habits for success: deciding once to reduce decision fatigue, utilizing the minimum effective dose to stay on track even on tough days, and taking action regardless of current feelings.Get your copy of Rachel's New Book Here: Audible, Amazon, Barnes & Noble, Books-A-Millon, Bookshop.org, or wherever books are sold!01:00 Welcome to the Show: Motivation vs. Momentum01:40 The Myth of Motivation03:42 Building Systems for Success05:23 Three Habits to Transform Your Life08:22 Habit 1: Decide Once12:48 Habit 2: Minimum Effective Dose28:40 Join the Community: Premium Podcast and Coaching30:41 Habit 3: Feelings vs. Actions38:23 Conclusion: Consistency Over MotivationSign up for Rachel's weekly email: https://msrachelhollis.com/insider/Call the podcast hotline and leave a voicemail! Call (737) 400-4626Watch the podcast on YouTube: http://youtube.com/@MsRachelHollisFollow along on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/MsRachelHollisTo learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Upgrade to the Premium Podcast Experience - https://rachelhollis.supercast.comIn this bonus episode of The Rachel Hollis Podcast, Rachel shares the heartfelt and detailed journey of relocating from Los Angeles to the Hudson Valley in New York. She discusses her longtime dream of living on a ranch, the unexpected move, and the series of events that led to her decision. Rachel candidly explains the challenges faced in LA, including disliking the city's politics, a remodel gone awry, and the lack of community feeling.Get your copy of Rachel's New Book Here: Audible, Amazon, Barnes & Noble, Books-A-Millon, Bookshop.org, or wherever books are sold!00:00 Dreams of a Ranch Life01:06 Welcome to the Podcast02:31 The Big Move to Hudson Valley03:32 Life in Los Angeles and Austin06:07 Challenges with Public and Private Schools12:58 The Remodel Nightmare18:48 Reevaluating Life Choices24:25 Dreaming of a Future in the Country28:47 Excitement About Moving29:25 Initial Plans and Considerations30:07 Exploring Hudson Valley30:33 School Research and Decisions33:09 Fast-Tracking the Move35:49 Convincing the Kids40:29 Finalizing the Move47:42 Reflecting on the Journey51:17 Settling into New York53:03 Looking ForwardSign up for Rachel's weekly email: https://msrachelhollis.com/insider/Call the podcast hotline and leave a voicemail! Call (737) 400-4626Watch the podcast on YouTube: http://youtube.com/@MsRachelHollisFollow along on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/MsRachelHollisTo learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.