Asking For A Friend with TalkDoc

In this episode of Asking For A Friend with TalkDoc, co-hosts Dr. Pamela Kreiser, Meredith Edwards Nagel, and Teighlor Polendo discuss the “Avoid Criticize Loop,” a destructive conflict pattern in relationships. They explain how indirect communication, passive-aggressive comments, and involving third parties escalate conflicts instead of resolving them. Through relatable examples, the hosts emphasize the importance of direct and vulnerable communication, recognizing and addressing one's role in the cycle, and setting boundaries to promote healthier interactions. Tune in for practical insights on improving your communication and relationship strategies. Music by epidemic sound.

In this Father's Day special episode of Asking For A Friend with TalkDoc, co-hosts Dr. Pamela Kreiser, Meredith Edwards Nagel, and Teighlor Polendo step aside and give the microphones over to their spouses, Pete, Tom, and Ralph. In this episode, they dive into personal stories, tips for self-care, managing work-from-home life, and the joys and struggles of parenting. Tune in for an insightful conversation peppered with heartfelt moments and practical advice that every dad (and mom) can relate to. Plus, a fun Father's Day quiz to keep things lively!  Music by epidemic sound. SHOW NOTES: Experts :  Father's Everywhere! Resources : Previous Father's Day Episodes AFAF Episode #54 Father Knows Best! How to Foster Curiosity and Build Self-Confidence in Your Child https://pod.link/afafwithtalkdoc/episode/25a4c29ea0c9724f21a6e527329d0a46 AFAF Episode #079 AFAF on the First Year of Fatherhood https://pod.link/afafwithtalkdoc/episode/af7ed8332bcbdd686df18d1e09a7af0c

In this episode of Asking For A Friend with TalkDoc, co-hosts Dr. Pamela Kreiser, Meredith Edwards Nagel, and Teighlor Polendo dive into the topic of tit-for-tat arguing and its detrimental impact on relationships. They explore the concept of critical startup moments, blame shifting, and the risks of competitive retaliation. The hosts offer practical strategies for breaking these negative patterns, such as active listening, taking responsibility, and practicing empathy. Drawing on research from John Gottman, they discuss how mindful communication can prevent conflicts from escalating and help build trust and emotional connection. Whether you're facing relationship challenges or seeking to improve your communication skills, this episode provides valuable insights and actionable advice. Music by epidemic sound. SHOW NOTES: Resources :  Dr. John Gottman - Gottman Institute https://www.gottman.com/ Dr. Marc Brackett's Book - Permission to Feel https://marcbrackett.com/permission-to-feel/ Link: AFAF Episode #031 - Leading Questions - How to Ask Neutral Questions https://pod.link/afafwithtalkdoc/episode/b861b25d7ba33bf133fdc9cad3de2a9a

In this heartfelt episode, we welcome back Melissa Beck, President of Anonymous Philanthropy, to share her wisdom on balancing the multifaceted roles of being a mother, career woman, and spouse. From managing career expectations, unseen labor, and burnout, to the importance of boundaries and the emotional rollercoaster of motherhood, Melissa provides deep insights and practical advice. The episode also delves into Melissa's supportive 'mothership' group, her experiences raising three teenage boys, and the impactful work she does in philanthropy. Join us as we explore the strength, struggles, and triumphs of being a working mom. Music by epidemic sound. SHOW NOTES: Experts :  Melissa Beck and Mothers everywhere Link to previous AFAF Episode with Melissa Beck on Generosity:   https://youtu.be/wEnzueUNT0E

In this enlightening episode of Asking For A Friend with TalkDoc, co-hosts Dr. Pamela Kreiser, Meredith Edwards Nagle, and Teighlor Polendo delve into the complexities of maintaining cherished relationships. The episode addresses the common tendency to focus on differences rather than similarities and offers practical tools to bridge gaps and create connections. It highlights examples from everyday life, family gatherings, workplace dynamics, and even vacations to illustrate how emphasizing commonalities can lead to more harmonious interactions. Learn how shifting your language and mindset from 'me' vs. 'you' to 'we' and 'us' can transform the way you connect with others.  Music by epidemic sound. SHOW NOTES: Experts :  Clark and Brennan - Common Ground Theory Resources :  McCorkle and Reese: Mediation Theory and Practice

Welcome back to Asking For A Friend with TalkDoc, featuring hosts Dr. Pamela Kreiser, Meredith Edwards Nagle, and Teighlor Polendo. In today's episode, we explore “reframing”—a powerful mental communication tool backed by research that helps cultivate resilience, clarity, and purpose. The discussion juxtaposes growth versus fixed mindsets and optimism versus pessimism, drawing on insights from Martin Seligman's “Learned Optimism” and Carol Dweck's “Mindset: The Psychology of Success.” Through personal anecdotes and practical examples, we delve into how shifting our perspectives can turn challenges into opportunities for growth. Whether it's navigating relationship breakups or dealing with everyday inconveniences, reframing aids in approaching problems from new angles and adapting a growth-oriented mindset. Join us as we uncover ways to enhance your emotional well-being and relationship dynamics through the transformative power of reframing.  Music by epidemic sound. SHOW NOTES: Experts/Resources:  Martin Seligman - Learned Optimism https://www.amazon.com/Learned-Optimism-Change-Your-Mind/dp/0671019112 Brene Brown - Rising Strong https://brenebrown.com/book/rising-strong/ Carol Dweck - Mindset: The New Psychology of Success https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/40745.Mindset AFAF Links : Episode #004: Birthday Mindset! How to Stay Positive https://pod.link/afafwithtalkdoc/episode/655b369db039ba1eea98440837bb86d4

In this episode of Asking For A Friend with TalkDoc, Dr. Pamela Kreiser, Meredith Edwards Nagle, and Teighlor Polendo discuss the importance of setting boundaries in personal and professional relationships. They demystify common misconceptions, explore why boundaries are essential for healthy interactions, and offer practical advice on how to create, state, and maintain effective boundaries. The conversation includes real-life examples and role-playing scenarios to help listeners understand the importance of clear, direct communication. Tune in to learn how to respect your needs and foster stronger relationships through thoughtful boundary-setting.  Music by epidemic sound. SHOW NOTES: Experts :  Dr. Nicole LaPera, Cloud and Townsend Resources :  Dr. Nicole LaPera's Formula for Boundaries CREATE STATE MAINTAIN https://theholisticpsychologist.com/boundaries-the-ultimate-life-hack/ Cloud and Townsend's Book: https://www.boundariesbooks.com/products/boundaries-updated-expanded-edition Links to AFAF Episodes on Boundaries :  Episode #020: Myths of Boundaries https://pod.link/afafwithtalkdoc/episode/c6b431c4b18335a1759db7588986fd0d Episode #021: Boundaries 101 - How to Say No! https://pod.link/afafwithtalkdoc/episode/8dc8625be3a918b62f8c9d16a1f888f9 Episode #022: Managing Boundaries - How to Manage Difficult People https://pod.link/afafwithtalkdoc/episode/04a05256443fa4baabf2b3dcbfcc32d9 Episode #067: How to Set Boundaries to Help Others Treat You Well https://youtu.be/DWsp-Ma9ZMs Episode #068: How to Handle Boundary Testers https://youtu.be/WeAdKxNlhB0

In this episode of Asking For A Friend with TalkDoc, Dr. Pamela Kreiser, Meredith Edwards Nagle, and Teighlor Polendo explore the concept of stonewalling in relationships. They discuss common misconceptions, Gottman's Four Horsemen, and the damaging effects stonewalling can have on relationships. The conversation includes personal anecdotes, practical advice on how to manage and recognize stonewalling, and effective strategies like planning discussions to avoid emotional flooding. Tune in for insightful tips and real-life experiences to improve your communication and relational dynamics. Music by epidemic sound. SHOW NOTES: Experts :  Dr. John Gottman, Gottman Institute https://www.gottman.com/ Listen Here: Shut Down Mode Episode #005: https://pod.link/afafwithtalkdoc/episode/100334e9de176a1fa5f53be4503458cf Watch and Listen Here: AFAF REWIND "How to Manage Stonewalling" Episode #094: https://youtu.be/lTGfidapgAo

In this episode of Asking For A Friend with TalkDoc, Dr. Pamela Kreiser, Meredith Edwards Nagle, and Teighlor Polendo take a deep dive into defensiveness in relationships. They explore how defensiveness affects communication, relationships, and even children, drawing from personal experiences and research by Dr. John Gottman. The hosts break down Gottman's 'Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse' and discuss practical strategies to reduce defensiveness, including taking responsibility, seeking clarity, and reframing interactions. Tune in for expert insights and actionable tools to strengthen your communication and relationships. Music by epidemic sound.

In this episode of “Asking For A Friend with TalkDoc,” Dr. Pamela Kreiser, Meredith Edwards Nagle, and Teighlor Polendo discuss the intricacies of communication and relationships, emphasizing the difference between intent and impact. Using Maya Angelou's quote as a backdrop, the hosts explore how words and actions leave lasting impressions.  Join the conversation as they share personal stories and research findings to highlight the importance of empathy, curiosity, and mindful communication in maintaining and repairing close relationships. Practical tips, including perception checks, are provided to help listeners improve their interactions, particularly in long-term relationships and family dynamics.  Music by epidemic sound. SHOW NOTES: Experts :  Angelou, Stamp and Knapp, Albright, Brown, Gottman Resources :  Stamp and Knapp Article: https://psycnet.apa.org/record/1991-04377-001 Albright, et al. Study: https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S0022103103001288 Maya Angelou Quotation: https://www.goodreads.com/author/quotes/3503.Maya_Angelou Brene Brown: https://brenebrown.com/art/ Gottman Institute: https://www.gottman.com/ Tools : Formula for Perception Checking Identify the Behavior Offer Two Interpretations Request for Clarification Links :  Episode 001: The Message Received is the One That Counts https://pod.link/afafwithtalkdoc/episode/6dce9b4a421e11cc80560cc626684dde Episode 065: REAL TALK! Checking Our Perception Checking https://youtu.be/qFih99VMeOU  

In this episode, TalkDoc, Meredith and Teighlor dive into the hilarious and insightful things kids say. From funny family anecdotes to holiday preparations, discover the lighter side of parenting and the developmental quirks of childhood speech.  Listen in as our hosts discuss the cognitive theories behind children's humor and the importance of embracing curiosity over social embarrassment.  The episode underscores the importance of curiosity, honesty, and the joy found in innocent, childlike perspectives. Don't miss their entertaining holiday quiz and expert tips on navigating parenting challenges. Music by epidemic sound. SHOW NOTES: Experts :  Dr. Jean Piaget, Dr. Michael Gervais Resources :  Children's Humor Article: https://us.sagepub.com/sites/default/files/upm-binaries/4884_ScarlettChapter5.pdf Gervais article in Harvard Business Review: https://hbr.org/2019/05/how-to-stop-worrying-about-what-other-people-think-of-you Watch/Listen to Simon Sinek Podcast with Michael Gervais: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eWrpJ00IQWY Michael Gervais Book on Mastery: https://findingmastery.com/book/ Links : Family Survival Kit for the Holidays #034: Family Survival Kit Part 1 - How to Manage Expectations https://pod.link/afafwithtalkdoc/episode/8026ba30dfc35b46303b9c5cd9cfc24e #035: Family Survival Kit Part 2 - How to Manage Family Rules and Traditions https://pod.link/afafwithtalkdoc/episode/6d2622d6e1f0782093fbb85bb38ac801 #036: Family Survival Kit Part 3 - How to Skip Guilt Trips https://pod.link/afafwithtalkdoc/episode/3b9ec74a701299cdcf662394b86d71fa #037: Family Survival Kit Part 4 - How to Handle Bad Behavior https://pod.link/afafwithtalkdoc/episode/d538f81fa48a0e67d27c18d61ec66d04 #038: Family Survival Kit Part 5 - How to Manage Differences with Family https://pod.link/afafwithtalkdoc/episode/28ea4ed1fa69b3d210bfdb76ac415918 #039: Family Survival Kit Part 6 - Wise Words from 2021 https://pod.link/afafwithtalkdoc/episode/a4622dcca7ab2641d3fb91fb9f3aad54

In this episode, TalkDoc, Meredith and Teighlor share personal anecdotes from their week, including funny family moments and unexpected challenges that set the tone for a lively and relatable discussion. They dive into the fascinating dynamics of conformity and the pressures to fit in, exploring why people often stay silent in group settings or avoid conflict.  The conversation unpacks the psychological forces at play, such as social anxiety and FOPO (Fear of Other People's Opinions), and examines the emotional toll of compromising authenticity to align with group norms. Drawing insights from thought leaders like Dr. Michael Gervais and Simon Sinek, the hosts, highlight the critical distinction between “fitting in” and “true belonging.”  They also discuss practical strategies to break free from societal pressures, live in alignment with your purpose, and build meaningful, authentic relationships. Whether you're navigating workplace dynamics or seeking deeper connections in your personal life, this episode offers thought-provoking takeaways and actionable advice to help you speak up and stay true to yourself. Music by epidemic sound. SHOW NOTES: Experts :  Dr. Brene Brown, Simon Sinek, Dr. Michael Gervais Resources :  Brene Brown's Book: Braving the Wilderness https://brenebrown.com/book/braving-the-wilderness/ Gervais article in Harvard Business Review: https://hbr.org/2019/05/how-to-stop-worrying-about-what-other-people-think-of-you Watch/Listen to Simon Sinek Podcast with Michael Gervais: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eWrpJ00IQWY Michael Gervais Book on Mastery: https://findingmastery.com/book/ Gervais 3 Questions on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/michaelgervais/p/CyglHCFATF1/?img_index=1

In this episode of “Asking for a Friend,” hosts Dr. Pamela Kreiser, Meredith Edwards Nagle, and Teighlor Polendo take a deep dive into the fascinating world of humblebragging. Together, they unpack what humblebragging really is, why we do it, and how it shapes our social interactions. With humor and relatable examples, the hosts explore the subtle yet powerful impact humblebragging has on friendships, work dynamics, and even our social media presence. Tune in for insightful discussions on responding to humblebragging, tips to break the habit, and advice on handling humblebrags like a pro. Music by epidemic sound. SHOW NOTES: Harvard Studies on Humblebragging: https://www.hbs.edu/ris/Publication%20Files/Sezer%20Gino%20Norton%20Humblebragging_0533fa02-7fcd-4585-91c9-b7281174edf9.pdf

In this last episode of our three-part series on Brené Brown's Atlas of the Heart (2021), Meredith, Teighlor, and TalkDoc dive deep into Chapter 11 focusing on the concepts of joy, happiness, tranquility, and contentment. Engage with discussions on the importance of vulnerability, the impact of gratitude on life satisfaction, and practical tips for fostering joy and contentment in parenting. Through personal anecdotes and practical insights, learn how to balance control with connection and appreciate the present moment to enhance your emotional and mental well-being. Music by epidemic sound.   SHOW NOTES: Experts :  Dr. Brene Brown   Brene Brown's Book: “Atlas of the Heart” https://brenebrown.com/book/atlas-of-the-heart/   Brene Brown's Book: “Dare to Lead” https://www.reddit.com/r/wholesomememes/comments/9hd2ye/this_is_why_the_dog_is_happier/

In the second episode of our three-part series on Brené Brown's Atlas of the Heart (2021), Meredith, Teighlor, and TalkDoc dive deep into Chapter 10: 'The Places We Go When the Heart Is Open.' This chapter explores powerful emotions like love, heartbreak, trust, betrayal, defensiveness, and hurt.  Together, we unpack the challenges of vulnerability, the journey to rebuild trust, and the emotional barriers that keep us guarded. Meredith offers thoughtful reflections on how opening up can be both difficult and rewarding in relationships. Join us for an engaging conversation about navigating these emotional landscapes and embracing the courage to keep our hearts open.  Music by epidemic sound. SHOW NOTES: Experts :  Brown and Hooks Brene Brown's Book: “Atlas of the Heart” https://brenebrown.com/book/atlas-of-the-heart/ Brene Brown's Book: “Dare to Lead” https://brenebrown.com/book/dare-to-lead/ Brene Brown's “B-R-A-V-I-N-G” Acronym https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OqB5CEkPlI4&t=76s Bell Hooks Book “All about Love” https://bellhooksbooks.com/product/all-about-love/

Join hosts Dr. Pamela Kreiser, Meredith Edwards Nagle, and Teighlor Polendo in this episode of Asking for a Friend with TalkDoc. They delve into Chapter 9 of Brené Brown's “Atlas of the Heart” which explores the places we go when we search for connection. Covering topics such as belonging, fitting in, connection, disconnection, insecurity, invisibility, and loneliness, the hosts share personal insights and practical advice.  Hear our conversation about the importance of vulnerability and authenticity in fostering meaningful relationships and discuss the challenges of balancing self-acceptance with the desire to connect with others. Tune in for a heartfelt discussion on creating deeper connections and understanding the complexities of human relationships. Music by epidemic sound. SHOW NOTES: Experts :  Brown, Clifton, Maslow Brene Brown's Book: Atlas of the Heart https://brenebrown.com/book/atlas-of-the-heart/ Strengthsfinder 2.0 https://www.gallup.com/cliftonstrengths/en/254033/strengthsfinder.aspx Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs: https://www.simplypsychology.org/maslow.html Timestamps: 00:00 Welcome to Asking for a Friend 00:19 Overview of Atlas of the Heart 00:42 Taylor's Personal Connection to Chapter Nine 01:27 Exploring Belonging and Fitting In 04:35 Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs and Belonging 08:12 The Importance of Vulnerability in Relationships 17:21 Challenges of Connection and Perfectionism 25:39 Cultivating Deeper Connections 27:28 Conclusion and Podcast Information

In this episode, we welcome Melissa Beck, President of Anonymous, an organization specializing in philanthropic strategies for wealthy families. Melissa discusses the complexities of giving away money effectively, emphasizing the importance of identifying specific goals and passions. She highlights the personal nature of their process, which involves deep, empathetic listening and strategic planning to maximize impact and fulfillment. Listen in to our conversation as we touch on the challenges and joys of philanthropy, the evolving landscape of generosity, and how even small acts of kindness can profoundly impact lives. Join us as we explore fresh perspectives on generosity, creativity in giving, and how to make a lasting difference. Music by epidemic sound. SHOW NOTES: About Melissa: https://www.anonymousllc.com/melissa-beck About Anonymous Philanthropy: https://www.anonymousllc.com/who-we-are Melissa's Favorite Reads:  Measure What Matters by John Doerr https://www.whatmatters.com/ The Power of Moments by Chip and Dan Heath https://heathbrothers.com/books/the-power-of-moments/ Die with Zero by Bill Perkins https://www.diewithzerobook.com/welcome Unreasonable Hospitality by Will Guidara https://www.unreasonablehospitality.com/

In this episode, we explore the deep-seated impact of comparison on our creativity, happiness, and overall well-being, inspired by the insights of Brené Brown. We dive into Social Comparison Theory, breaking down the differences between upward and downward comparisons, and how each shapes our self-perception and emotional state. Through candid personal stories and actionable strategies—like the practice of gratitude—we reveal the often unnoticed harm that comparison brings to our lives. We'll also share tips on how to shift focus from external benchmarks to personal growth and joy. Join us as we unpack the nuances of comparison and discover ways to cultivate a more fulfilling, self-directed life. Music by epidemic sound. SHOW NOTES: Experts :  Dr. Brene Brown, Dr. Leon Festinger Resources :   “Comparison is the thief of Joy” - President Theodore Roosevelt Atlas of the Heart by Brene Brown https://brenebrown.com/book/atlas-of-the-heart/ Overview of Social Comparison Theory: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/basics/social-comparison-theory

In this insightful episode, hosts Dr. Pamela Kreiser (TalkDoc), Meredith Edwards Nagle, and Teighlor Polendo dive into the phenomenon of negative sentiment override. Discover how negative experiences can overshadow positive ones in relationships and learn the importance of maintaining a healthy emotional balance.  This episode offers practical strategies to manage and improve personal interactions, highlighting the psychological impact of negative sentiment override. Through real-life examples and expert advice, the hosts provide valuable insights on fostering better communication and enhancing positivity in the relationships we want to keep.  Music by epidemic sound. SHOW NOTES: Experts :  Dr. John Gottman, Gottman Institute Resources :  https://www.gottman.com/blog/blame-resentment-and-negative-sentiment-override/ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/happy-healthy-relationships/202209/is-your-relationship-in-negative-sentiment-override https://www.emotionstherapycalgary.ca/blog-therapy-calgary-emotions-clinic/negative-sentiment-override#:~:text=A%20negative%20sentiment%20override%20occurs,in%20nurturing%20a%20healthy%20relationship

Join us as we sit down with licensed marriage and family therapist Christopher Faris, who shares his journey from traditional therapy to creating engaging YouTube content on his channel Mort's Garage. In this episode, we delve into imposter syndrome—what it is, where it comes from, and how it affects individuals, especially high achievers. Christopher offers insight into the intersection of anxiety and imposter syndrome and provides practical advice on how to manage and overcome these feelings through exposure to truth, specific praise, and meaningful communication. Tune in for an informative and relatable discussion that will leave you pondering the depths of your own achievements and self-worth. Whether you're struggling with self-doubt or looking to better understand this pervasive issue, this episode is packed with valuable insights and strategies to help you recognize and combat imposter syndrome. Don't miss out on this opportunity to learn from an expert and take steps toward a more confident, authentic self. Music by epidemic sound. SHOW NOTES: Resources :  Brene Brown on compassion: https://brenebrown.com/art/atlas-of-the-heart-comparison-is-the-crush-of-conformity-from-one-side-and-competition-from-the-other/ Attachment theory: https://www.simplypsychology.org/attachment.html Links : Mort's Garage YouTube Channel by Christopher Faris: https://www.youtube.com/@MortsGarage Healthy Gamer GG: https://www.youtube.com/@HealthyGamerGG

In this episode, hosts Dr. Pamela Kreiser, Meredith Edwards Nagle, and Teighlor Polendo revisit episode 59 featuring Christopher Faris and Carrie Johnson. The discussion delves into anger management, exploring the nature of anger, its physiological effects, and strategies for controlling emotional responses. Through insightful definitions and personal anecdotes, they emphasize the importance of understanding and managing anger to prevent negative consequences. The hosts also highlight the significance of being curious rather than condemning one's feelings, and the role of emotions in deriving meaning from experiences. Music by epidemic sound. SHOW NOTES: Link: AFAF Episode #059 Anger Management! How to Tame Your Temper with Christopher Faris and Carrie Johnson https://pod.link/afafwithtalkdoc/episode/d3a4aa5fad6104f0aafc2a80e3cb04dc

In this episode of "Asking for a Friend,” join Dr. Pamela Kreiser, Meredith Edwards Nagle, and Teighlor Polendo dive deep into the nuances between direct and indirect communication styles. Through personal experiences, expert insights, and practical examples, they explore why individuals might prefer one method over the other and how these preferences are influenced by cultural backgrounds. The discussion includes an analysis of Cynthia Joyce's article on communication impact, interactive quizzes, and valuable tips for bridging the gap between different communicative approaches. Whether it's navigating breakups, professional settings, or everyday interactions, this episode offers a comprehensive guide to improving communication and relationships. Music by epidemic sound. SHOW NOTES: Experts :  Dr. Cynthia Joyce Resources :  Dr. Cynthia Joyce's Chart: https://conflictmanagement.org.uiowa.edu/sites/conflictmanagement.org.uiowa.edu/files/2020-01/Direct%20and%20Indirect%20Communication.pdf Huffington Post Article:  https://www.huffpost.com/archive/ca/entry/how-to-break-up-with-someone_ca_5cd50d35e4b07bc729744f20/amp Breaking up: https://news.byu.edu/news/delivering-bad-news-dont-beat-around-bush Direct vs. Indirect Speech: https://everydayspeech.com/sel-implementation/pros-and-cons-direct-communication-vs-indirect-communication/ Ending Relationships: https://www.researchgate.net/publication/254376804_Strategies_for_ending_relationships_Two_studies Links : AFAF Episode #027: The Dance of Visibility (Part 1): How to Speak Up! https://pod.link/afafwithtalkdoc/episode/1980a02db6d55a72c46cfe659ca2cb03 AFAF Episode #028: The Dance of Visibility (Part 2): How to Stop Over Explaining! https://pod.link/afafwithtalkdoc/episode/7256cb9fd6ba3bb1893f130453818b47 AFAF Episode #027: The Dance of Visibility (Part 3): Strategic Alignment - How to be a Better Communicator! https://pod.link/afafwithtalkdoc/episode/51e031a91f4867fad1d39e7929d4247a AFAF Episode #018: Beating Around the Bush - How to Choose Your Words https://pod.link/afafwithtalkdoc/episode/d5be7964f269f49c542b588e21652c8a

In this episode of "Asking for a Friend,” join Dr. Pamela Kreiser, Meredith Edwards Nagle, and Teighlor Polendo as they delve into the toxic dynamics of contempt in interpersonal relationships. Dubbed the "worst of the four horsemen" by renowned researcher John Gottman, contempt is a critical indicator of potential relationship demise. Tune in as we unpack the verbal and non-verbal signs of contempt, its devastating effects on relationships, and its alarming impact on individual health, including heightened vulnerability to infectious diseases. Through engaging discussions, we highlight practical solutions and emphasize the importance of nurturing a culture of appreciation rather than criticism. Featuring real-life examples and personal stories, this episode offers listeners valuable insights into recognizing and addressing contempt in their relationships. Join the conversation and learn how to build healthier, more respectful connections.  Music by epidemic sound.

In this episode, we dive deep into the fascinating world of deception, exaggeration, and confabulations in our everyday interactions. We start by unraveling the mechanics of intentional deception, where people consciously mislead others to alter beliefs or obscure the truth. Our discussion then transitions to exaggeration—a widespread yet often overlooked form of deception used for storytelling, emphasis, or humor. Through relatable anecdotes, we expose how even harmless exaggeration can erode trust over time. Next, we explore the realm of confabulations, where individuals unknowingly fabricate false memories or beliefs. These 'honest lies' can have profound effects on relationships and communication. By examining both scientific research and personal experiences, we shed light on the subtle yet significant impact of these phenomena. Join TalkDoc, Meredith, and Teighlor as we uncover the delicate balance between truth and falsehood in our interactions, offering insights and reflections that will make you rethink the way you communicate and build trust with others. Music by epidemic sound. SHOW NOTES: Experts :  Brene Brown, Clifton, and Gottschall Resources :  Brene Brown's Books: Dare to Lead and Rising Strong https://brenebrown.com/ Clifton Strengths Finder 2.0 https://www.gallup.com/cliftonstrengths/en/254033/strengthsfinder.aspx Jonathan Gottschall (2013) - The Story Telling Animal: How Stories Make Us Human https://www.amazon.com/Storytelling-Animal-Stories-Make-Human/dp/0544002342 Strength Finder Tool:  https://www.gallup.com/cliftonstrengths/en/252137/home.aspx Links : AFAF Episode 13 “The Stories We Make Up” https://pod.link/afafwithtalkdoc/episode/97368b3e753092d12a97c52d74b58cbf Key and Peele Skit - Text Message Confusion: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=naleynXS7yo

Join TalkDoc, Meredith, and Teighlor on the latest episode as we dive into understanding the intricacies of healthy relationships. In this episode, we revisit essential topics covered in our previous discussions on spotting red flags (Episode 80) and green flags (Episode 82). We take a retrospective look at episodes 80 through 83, exploring how past experiences and family backgrounds shape our ability to identify warning signs and the role of compassion in this process. Highlights include a robust discussion on the significance of green flags, such as experiencing genuine happiness and self-assuredness in the presence of a partner. We emphasize the importance of personal growth and boundary setting, underlining how self-awareness contributes to building fulfilling relationships. Tune in as we stress the educational aspect of our content, offering practical insights aimed at enhancing communication and fostering healthy relationships. Music by epidemic sound. SHOW NOTES: Links : AFAF Episode 80: How to Spot Red Flags in Relationships and Dating https://pod.link/afafwithtalkdoc/episode/04fba5aa22def91904d762e99f13460b AFAF Episode 82: How to Spot Green Flags in Relationships and Dating https://pod.link/afafwithtalkdoc/episode/ee9c3bc999440ea80693b973303b7eeb

In this latest episode, TalkDoc, Meredith and Teighlor embark on a deep dive into the intricate world of deception within human communication and relationships. Unveiling the staggering statistics that reveal an average of three lies every ten minutes in a conversation, the hosts unravel the multifaceted layers of lying. From harmless white lies to intentional omissions and complex equivocations, the discussion uncovers the spectrum of lies we encounter daily, shedding light on the ethical dilemmas they pose. Through personal stories and compelling research, the hosts illuminate how lies often serve dual purposes—shielding feelings while also serving the liar's self-interests. Tune in as we dissect the myriad reasons behind lying, dissecting its impact on relationships, and navigating the delicate balance between honesty and maintaining social harmony. This episode promises an engaging dialogue that challenges our understanding of truth and deception in the fabric of human connection. Music by epidemic sound. SHOW NOTES: Experts :  Adler and Towne, Bavelas et al., Metts Statistics on Lying - University of Wisconsin-La Crosse https://www.uwlax.edu/currents/how-often-do-people-lie/ Lying Less Linked to Better Health by American Psy. Association https://www.apa.org/news/press/releases/2012/08/lying-less The Brain Adapts to Dishonesty by Garrett et al. (2016) https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC5238933/ Study on Sexual Rejection Messages by Metts, Cupach, and Imahori: https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/abs/10.1080/10570319209374398 Resources :  Adler and Towne's Book: Looking Out, Looking In

Join TalkDoc, Meredith, and Teighlor on the latest episode of “Asking for a Friend with TalkDoc,” where we revisit an essential topic covered in Episode 58: Keeping Your Cool: How to Control Your Emotions So They Don't Control You. We explore practical strategies for navigating challenging emotions, we draw from the insights of leading researchers like Marc Brackett and Brené Brown. In this episode, we emphasize the art of recognizing and understanding the initial physical sensations that accompany emotional responses, a crucial step in preventing emotions from hijacking rational thought processes. Instead of trying to evade these feelings, we advocate for embracing them and employing mindful techniques to regain control. Key techniques discussed include body awareness exercises to pinpoint emotional triggers, conscious deep breathing to promote relaxation, and leveraging the parasympathetic nervous system to lower cortisol levels and promote calmness. By tuning in to this episode, you'll gain valuable tools for managing emotions effectively, maintaining composure in stressful situations, and fostering healthier communication and relationships. Tune in for transformative insights and actionable steps toward emotional mastery. Music by epidemic sound. SHOW NOTES: Experts :  Dr. Marc Brackett and Dr. Brene Brown Links : AFAF Episode #058: Keeping Your Cool: How to Control Your Emotions So They Don't Control You https://pod.link/afafwithtalkdoc/episode/e7556c93c8e574aa35cdcff0b649e66e

In this latest episode of our podcast, TalkDoc, Meredith, and Teighlor tackle the intricate dance between mothers and their smartphone habits. With Mother's Day as our backdrop, we embark on a heartfelt exploration of personal anecdotes, unveiling the layers of guilt that often accompany excessive phone use, particularly when it interferes with meaningful moments with our children. Our conversation is a poignant reflection of the ongoing struggle to strike a harmonious balance between fulfilling digital responsibilities and being fully present for our kids, shedding light on the phenomenon known as “technoference” and its impact on maternal contentment. Delving into the research, we dissect studies that illuminate the effects of maternal smartphone engagement on children's emotional states and cognitive synchronization during face-to-face interactions. These insights serve as a sobering reminder of the need to navigate our digital lives mindfully, cultivating strategies to mitigate guilt and foster healthier coping mechanisms. We don't just stop at analysis; we share actionable tips and techniques aimed at improving this dynamic. From establishing designated "phone-free" hours to prioritizing self-care for mental and relationship well-being, our episode serves as a beacon of support for mothers navigating the intricate web of modern-day connectivity and parenting. Join us as we navigate this nuanced terrain with empathy, understanding, and a commitment to nurturing stronger, more present relationships. Music by epidemic sound. SHOW NOTES: Experts :  Wolfers, Wendt, Becker, and Utz (2023), Pew Research Center, McDaniel & Radesky  Technoference is defined as “everyday interruptions in interpersonal interactions or time spent together that occur due to the digital and mobile technology devices” (McDaniel & Radesky, 2018, p. 100. Resources :  Wolfers, Wendt, Becker, and Utz (2023) article: “Do you love your phone more than your child? The consequences of norms and guilt around maternal smartphone use” https://academic.oup.com/hcr/article/49/3/285/7010694 Cartoon by Michael Leunig (2019): https://www.leunig.com.au/curly-world/opinion-september-2020/35-news/recent-cartoons-images/988-mummy-was-busy Research on Parental Burnout by Zhang, Hu, and Mao (2023): https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/abs/10.1177/01430343231201863 Pew Research on Teens and Parents Approach to Screen Time: https://www.pewresearch.org/internet/2024/03/11/how-teens-and-parents-approach-screen-time/ Research on Still Face and Babies: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3289403/ https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/32857440/ Research on Reading and Phone Interruptions: https://www.researchgate.net/publication/358408603_Reduced_mother-child_brain-to-brain_synchrony_during_joint_storytelling_interaction_interrupted_by_a_media_usage Links : AFAF Episode #015: What the Phub! https://pod.link/afafwithtalkdoc/episode/49181892af68bd3170e025ea77a58de5

Are your loved ones left guessing about your true feelings? Do you often find yourself taking the safer route by avoiding emotional conversations? It's easy to overlook the importance of identifying, labeling, and expressing our emotions effectively. However, enhancing our emotional expression is crucial for nurturing healthy relationships. After all, we're emotional beings who sometimes think! Join us in this episode as we dive back into the valuable insights from episodes 53 and 55. We'll explore actionable strategies to help you better understand and convey your emotions. Tune in now to discover ways to strengthen communication with your closest relationship partners, ensuring that you leave no room for guesswork. Music by epidemic sound. SHOW NOTES: Experts :  Marc Brackett AFAF Episode #053: Sad? Mad? Glad? How to Expand Your Emotional Vocabulary https://pod.link/afafwithtalkdoc/episode/6838118c4eb4b0ddd297f0f74e2edd26 AFAF Episode #055: All the Feels! How to Better Express Your Feelings https://pod.link/afafwithtalkdoc/episode/1b17807d586eb084ea5e45230bcd422b

Understanding Codependency and Hypervigilance In this episode of Asking for a Friend with TalkDoc, we deep dive into the intricate dynamics of Codependency and Hypervigilance. Our guest, Carrie Johnson, brings a wealth of knowledge and experience to the table, enriching our understanding of these crucial subjects. Join TalkDoc, Meredith, Teighlor, and Carrie as we navigate the nuances of codependency, moving beyond its conventional ties to addiction and exploring its multifaceted manifestations in various relationships. Drawing from a poignant personal story shared by a student, our conversation sheds light on how codependency can manifest in interactions with narcissists and dependents alike, offering profound insights into the complexities of human connection. Hypervigilance takes center stage as we unravel its impact on individuals navigating emotionally volatile environments. We explore how this heightened state of awareness influences coping mechanisms and discuss practical strategies for cultivating resilience and reclaiming autonomy. Throughout the episode, we emphasize the transformative power of self-compassion, the healing journey of re-parenting oneself, and the importance of establishing healthy boundaries. Our exploration extends to valuable resources such as therapy and support groups, underlining the significance of seeking professional guidance and communal support in navigating these challenges. Tune in as we champion self-awareness, advocate for nurturing meaningful relationships, and champion the invaluable practice of prioritizing mental well-being. This episode promises a wealth of wisdom and actionable insights for anyone seeking to unravel the intricacies of codependency and hypervigilance in their lives. Music by epidemic sound.   SHOW NOTES: Experts :  Murray Bowen (Family Systems)  https://www.thebowencenter.org/core-concepts-diagrams   Resources :    Co-Dependent No More by Melody Beattie https://www.melodybeattie.com/codependentnomore   Co-Dependents Anonymous https://coda.org/   Alcoholics Anonymous (Al-Anon) https://al-anon.org/   Adult Children of Alcoholics by Woititz https://www.amazon.com/Adult-children-alcoholics-Geringer-Woititz/dp/B000720PS8   Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents by Gibson https://www.amazon.com/Adult-Children-Emotionally-Immature-Parents-ebook/dp/B00TZE87S4   Boundaries by Cloud and Townsend https://www.boundariesbooks.com/ Links : Instagram Emily H. Sanders LMFThttps://www.instagram.com/emily.sanders.therapy/?hl=en Instagram Lisa Romano @LisaRomano https://www.instagram.com/lisaaromano/?hl=en   AFAF Episode 71: AFAF with Carrie Johnson on People Pleasers! https://pod.link/afafwithtalkdoc/episode/f51d610dd854351ecace50e61afb0c01   AFAF Episode 59: Anger Management! How to Tame Your Temper with Christopher Faris and Carrie Johnson https://pod.link/afafwithtalkdoc/episode/d3a4aa5fad6104f0aafc2a80e3cb04dc  

Celebrating Episode 100   In the 100th episode of “Asking for a Friend with TalkDoc,” hosts TalkDoc, Meredith, and Teighlor celebrate the milestone by revisiting the very first episode titled, “The Message Received is the One That Counts.”  We discuss the challenges and misunderstandings that arise in communication, particularly focusing on the negative perception of sensitivity. Through personal anecdotes, we explore how being labeled as 'too sensitive' impacts relationships and communication, suggesting that sensitivity should instead be seen as a strength.  We delve into the importance of acknowledging the impact of our words on others, rather than justifying intentions, and offer strategies for better understanding and validating each other's feelings in conversations. The episode underscores the value of empathy and the significance of how messages are received in shaping effective and compassionate communication. Music by epidemic sound. SHOW NOTES: Link to AFAF Episode #001: Our First Full Episode! https://pod.link/afafwithtalkdoc/episode/6dce9b4a421e11cc80560cc626684dde Link to AFAF Episode #000: Nice to Meet You! https://pod.link/afafwithtalkdoc/episode/dc060c5a327d77522d1f2e3a5322d7b8

Have you ever been told, “I don't like your tone?” That simple statement carries a world of significance. It reflects not just the words spoken but also the emotional context and intention behind them. Our tone of voice serves as a powerful vehicle for transmitting feelings, attitudes, and intentions in every interaction. In this episode, we explore the intricate world of nonverbal communication, with a focus on tone as a vital component of paralanguage. Join TalkDoc, Meredith and Teighlor, as we unravel the layers of how tone can profoundly shape the interpretation and reception of our messages. From the volume and pitch to the pace and clarity of our speech, every nuance of tone plays a crucial role in conveying emotions, confidence levels, and overall competence. Drawing from personal experiences, we share anecdotes that illuminate how tone can either strengthen or strain relationships and communication dynamics. We dive into fascinating research on how voice pitch can influence attraction and how subtle variations in tone can reveal underlying emotions or hidden intentions, often speaking louder than words alone. Ultimately, this episode serves as a gentle reminder of the power of tone in our everyday interactions. By becoming more aware of our tone and learning to adjust it consciously, we can unlock the potential for more meaningful, empathetic, and impactful communication in both personal and professional realms. Tune in as we unravel the nuances of tone and its profound impact on our relationships and communication efficacy. Music by epidemic sound. SHOW NOTES: Experts :  Gottman, Gottman Institute, Guerrero, Touch Research Institute Resources :  Maya Angelou quotation: “I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.” Gottman and Notarius (2004): Observing Marital Interaction https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/abs/10.1111/j.1741-3737.2000.00927.x

In case you missed it, we are back with another AFAF Rewind! This is your chance to revisit Episodes #023 and #024: How to Manage Gaslighting (Part 1 and 2)  In this compelling two-part series, we delve deep into the often-misunderstood concept of “gaslighting” with Staci Ross, M.A., L.M.F.T., an expert in the field. Discover the nuanced layers of gaslighting as Staci breaks down this extreme manipulation tactic. Unveiling its systemic nature, she reveals how gaslighting is an intentional effort to erode a person's sense of self over time, strategically dismantling their support systems and fostering isolation. Join our insightful conversation with TalkDoc, Meredith, Teighlor, and Staci as we explore the subtle warning signs of gaslighting and empower you with strategies to break free from these toxic relationships. Staci's wealth of knowledge extends beyond theory, as she draws upon her personal experiences to shed light on these destructive patterns. Tune in to gain invaluable insights into discerning gaslighting and learn actionable steps to reclaim your sense of self.  Music by epidemic sound. SHOW NOTES: Link to full AFAF Episode 23: https://pod.link/afafwithtalkdoc/episode/172b1da84e9ef9e99153bd3d3622698b Link to full AFAF Episode 24: https://pod.link/afafwithtalkdoc/episode/3a5b4efae31991c46b80678dfad86f9f

Join us for a special episode of Asking for a Friend with TalkDoc as we delve into the world of Multiple Sclerosis (MS) in honor of MS Awareness Month. Our guest, Marissa Cirbo, bravely shares her personal journey with MS, shedding light on the challenges and triumphs she has faced since her diagnosis in 2022. Marissa takes us back to the beginning, recounting the unusual symptoms that first appeared after a trip to Mexico and the journey of discovery that followed. She discusses the frustrating experience of being initially misdiagnosed and the emotional rollercoaster of shock and grief upon receiving the correct diagnosis of MS. Throughout our conversation, Marissa eloquently navigates the complex medical maze she encountered and shares valuable insights into self-advocacy and finding a support network. One of the key takeaways from our discussion is the concept of MS as a "snowflake disease," highlighting the unique experiences and challenges that each individual with MS faces. Marissa's story emphasizes the importance of MS Awareness Month in raising awareness about these complexities, particularly the often invisible symptoms that can be so difficult to communicate. We also explore the impact of chronic illness on relationships, emphasizing the need for open and honest communication. Marissa shares practical advice for those who are newly diagnosed with MS and their families, including tips on setting boundaries and increasing self-awareness in communication. Throughout the episode, Marissa's resilience and proactive approach to managing her MS journey shine through, including her involvement in a support group for newly diagnosed individuals. Join us as we discover hope, healing, and meaningful connections amidst the challenges of chronic illness, and learn valuable communication strategies from Marissa's inspiring story. Music by epidemic sound. SHOW NOTES: Experts :  National MS Society, Multiple Sclerosis Association of America Resources/Links:  National Multiple Sclerosis Society https://www.nationalmssociety.org/ The National MS Society's vision is: A World Free of MS. The Society's mission is: We will cure MS while empowering people affected by MS to live their best lives.  Multiple Sclerosis Association of America (MSAA) https://mymsaa.org/ The Multiple Sclerosis Association of America (MSAA) is a leading resource for the entire MS community, improving lives today through vital services and support. Can Do MS: https://cando-ms.org/ Free programs and resources help people living with multiple sclerosis and their care partners make each day the best it can be. Learn how MS can impact your life, find motivation and personalized guidance to overcome challenges and build a positive support network. Lived Health: https://www.livedhealth.org/ A free, patient-led online video resource shining light on long-term health conditions. We guide fellow patients through diagnosis, treatment and lifestyle.  

In case you missed it, we are back with another AFAF Rewind! This is your chance to revisit Episode #028: How to Stop Over Explaining! Ever catch yourself in the loop of over-explaining? It's like a dance move where we talk too much and end up regretting the whole interaction later on. We look back on Episode 28 where we unpack the anxieties that fuel our tendency to over-explain, from the fear of others' perceptions to the nagging sense of not quite fitting in. Join TalkDoc, Meredith, and Teighlor as we dissect four common pitfalls that muddy our messages: the stumbling block of repetition, the art of false starts, the peril of filled pauses, and the awkwardness of unfilled pauses. These communication hiccups not only risk confusing your audience but can also leave you second-guessing your entire interaction. Music by epidemic sound. SHOW NOTES: Link to AFAF Episode 28: https://pod.link/afafwithtalkdoc/episode/7256cb9fd6ba3bb1893f130453818b47

Have you ever pondered the complexities of your own reactions to being touched? Join us as we dive into the nuanced dynamics of touch, where it can be both a positive connection and, in certain contexts, a source of discomfort. In this episode, we begin our exploration of nonverbal communication by drawing on Judee Burgoon's renowned Expectancy Violation Theory. We dissect the intricate tapestry of our responses to touch from others. Burgoon provides a valuable framework that helps us navigate through instances where touch exceeds our expectations, both positively and negatively. Tune in to hear engaging discussions fueled by both research findings and personal experiences. Beyond adult interactions, we explore the profound significance of human touch in the early stages of life, acknowledging its indispensable role as a soothing and regulating force for infants and children. Join us as we unravel the layers of touch, an essential component of the human experience that not only connects us on a profound level but also serves as a powerful tool for maintaining our connections with others. Your understanding of communication and relationships is about to reach a whole new depth. Music by epidemic sound. SHOW NOTES: Experts :  Judee Burgoon, Mehrabian, Touch Research Institute, L. Guerrero,  Scientific American Resources :  Judee Burgoon's Expectancy Violation Theory https://www.communicationtheory.org/expectancy-violation-theory/ Judee Burgoon Explains Expectancy Violation Theory https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-kmnZIxiYHk Touching Map from University of Oxford https://www.ox.ac.uk/news/2015-10-27-maps-show-where-touching-allowed-0 Infant Touch Article https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/infant-touch/ Power of Touch by Chillot- Psychology Today https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/articles/the-power-of-touch

In case you missed it, we are back with another AFAF Rewind! This is your chance to revisit some of our most impactful episodes! In this episode, we are bringing you a clip from Episode #005: Shut Down Mode - How to Manage Stonewalling.  Stonewalling can be a red flag in any relationship, signaling potential challenges ahead or even worse. Join TalkDoc, Meredith, and Teighlor as we review practical ways to improve our relationships by managing stonewalling.  Join us as we dissect stonewalling and offer practical tips to transform your approach to relationships. Tune in, rewind, and rediscover the keys to unlocking stronger, more resilient connections in the relationships you want to keep.  Music by epidemic sound. SHOW NOTES: Experts :  Dr. John Gottman, Gottman Institute Episode #005: Shut Down Mode - How to Manage Stonewalling (Full Episode) https://pod.link/afafwithtalkdoc/episode/100334e9de176a1fa5f53be4503458cf Links: https://www.gottman.com/  

Ready to break free from the comfort zone and expand your world? Join us in the latest episode of Asking for a Friend with TalkDoc as we dive deep into the transformative power of Trading Comfort for Growth. Are your relationships and decisions keeping your world confined? Explore the subtle ways we unknowingly limit our choices and hinder personal growth. Delve into the dynamics of playing it safe versus embracing change in your social circles. Discover how resisting risk can affect the depth and richness of your connections. Learn about the pivotal moments where decisions either shrink or expand your world. Uncover the psychology behind choices and their impact on personal development. Join TalkDoc, Meredith, and Teighlor as we share actionable strategies to make your world bigger on both macro and micro levels. From meeting new people to making bold decisions, we've got you covered. Understand why a bigger world equals broader perspectives. Gain insights into yourself, others, and the world around you by breaking free from the confines of a small world mindset. Music by epidemic sound. SHOW NOTES: Experts :  Brene Brown, Latimore Resources :  Brene Brown's Book - Braving the Wilderness https://brenebrown.com/book/braving-the-wilderness/ AFAF Episode 23 and 24 Gaslighting Episodes Episode #023: AFAF with Staci Ross on How to Identify Gaslighting (PART 1) https://pod.link/afafwithtalkdoc/episode/172b1da84e9ef9e99153bd3d3622698b Episode #024: AFAF with Staci Ross on How to Manage Gaslighting (PART 2) https://pod.link/afafwithtalkdoc/episode/3a5b4efae31991c46b80678dfad86f9f Quotation : "The heaviest weight at the gym is the front door." —Ed Latimore

Introducing AFAF Rewind! Your look back on our podcast's greatest hits! As February unfolds, we pay homage to American Heart Month by revisiting Episode 60, a crucial discussion on Women and Heart Attacks. Tune in for poignant clips that shed light on the often overlooked signs, emphasizing the importance of awareness and proactive care. Consider this episode a heartfelt reminder to safeguard the well-being of the women in your life. Whether you missed it the first time or just want to revisit the essential insights, these curated snippets serve as a teaser, encouraging you to delve into the full episode. Join us in honoring American Heart Month by not only enjoying this retrospective episode but also sharing it with friends and family. Let's amplify the conversation on health, relationships, and the vital connections that make life meaningful. Your heart will thank you for it! Music by epidemic sound.  SHOW NOTES: AFAF Episode #060: Women and Heart Attacks https://pod.link/afafwithtalkdoc/episode/5802794d3abd2e633ee6f988817c5777 Experts :  Kim Newlin, RN, CNS, NP-C and Staci Ross, M.A., L.M.F.T. Resources : American Heart Association, New England Journal of Medicine, British Heart Foundation, Lancet,  Oregon Health & Science University, mysisters.org, Tisch Center for Women's Health at NYU's Langone Medical Center, Harvard Researcher Dr. Catherine Kreatsoulas Tools : (below) American Heart Association - Women: https://www.goredforwomen.org/en/ Youtube recommendation from Kim- “Just A Little Heart Attack”: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t7wmPWTnDbE What's your Heart Health? Link to the Tool: Essential 8 https://www.heart.org/en/healthy-living/healthy-lifestyle/lifes-essential-8

Have you ever been caught in the web of an undefined relationship, grappling with the ambiguity of where you stand? We've all been there, especially during those moments of introspection around widely celebrated holidays like Valentine's Day. In this thought-provoking episode, TalkDoc, Meredith and Teighlor dive into the world of undefined relationships, including "situationships." Join us as we navigate through the complexities of Valentine's Day and the myriad emotions it stirs within undefined connections. Ever heard of DTR (Define the Relationship) Talks? We unpack the significance of these crucial conversations and their impact on shaping the trajectory of relationships. We bring in the expertise of Dr. Davilla, who recommends developing essential skills to enhance the health of our relationships. From effective communication strategies to fostering commitment, Dr. Davilla's insights provide a roadmap for navigating the twists and turns of modern relationships. Whether you're in the throes of a situationship or seeking new strategies, tune in as we unravel the mysteries of undefined relationships and equip you with the tools to foster a healthier and more fulfilling connection. Your journey to improved relationship dynamics starts here! Music by epidemic sound. SHOW NOTES: Experts :  Dr. Joanne Davilla's Ted Talk: Skills for Healthy Relationships Developing Relationship Skills: Insight, mutuality, and emotion regulation. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gh5VhaicC6g Resources :  Situationships: What They Are and 5 Signs You're in One https://health.clevelandclinic.org/what-is-a-situationship The DTR Talk: How To Define The Relationship & When To Do It https://www.mindbodygreen.com/articles/why-defining-the-relationship-is-important-and-how-to-have-the-conversation Links : 75% cite “lack of commitment” as their identified reason for divorce. More information: https://www.forbes.com/advisor/legal/divorce/divorce-statistics/

The holidays are a time of joy, but they can also bring about stress, especially when it comes to openly discussing topics like money and gift-giving. It's a delicate dance that demands clarity and courage, especially in relationships that are already sensitive. In this episode, TalkDoc, Meredith, and Teighlor dive into the topic of setting expectations about gifts and money in those relationships we want to keep. Join us as we embark on a journey to explore practical strategies for our listeners to navigate these potentially tricky conversations. We discuss strategies including understanding the recipient's primary love language, emphasizing the importance of focusing on gifts that the receiver truly desires, rather than projecting the giver's preferences.  Candid conversations are at the heart of healthy relationships, and we delve into the art of having open and honest discussions about expectations. Setting boundaries is another key aspect that we explore, providing valuable insights on maintaining balance and ensuring mutual respect. Finally, we explore creative approaches to gift-giving, proving that thoughtful gestures often carry more weight than extravagant presents. So, whether you're in a long-term partnership, a new romance, or navigating family dynamics, this episode is packed with actionable advice to help you foster meaningful connections during the most wonderful time of the year.    Music by epidemic sound. SHOW NOTES: Resources :  The Five Love Languages https://5lovelanguages.com/ Steig Article on Holiday Expectations: https://www.refinery29.com/en-us/holiday-relationship-expectations The Simpsons - Homer's Bowling Ball Episode “Life on the Fast Lane”: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0701152/plotsummary/ Real Simple Article by Latimer https://www.realsimple.com/work-life/money/talk-about-money-with-friends Martha Stewart Article - “Setting Boundaries for the Holidays” https://www.marthastewart.com/8186986/how-tell-friends-no-holiday-gifts Links : Episode 75: How to Express Your Needs to Unlock More Intimacy https://pod.link/afafwithtalkdoc/episode/0fe8e82f7c04dd389c68b0029e5b4abd Episodes 20, 21, 22 Boundaries Series https://pod.link/afafwithtalkdoc/episode/c6b431c4b18335a1759db7588986fd0d https://pod.link/afafwithtalkdoc/episode/8dc8625be3a918b62f8c9d16a1f888f9 https://pod.link/afafwithtalkdoc/episode/04a05256443fa4baabf2b3dcbfcc32d9   Money Playlist - Music from the Quiz Money Money Money by ABBA https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ETxmCCsMoD0 Bitch Better Have My Money by Rihanna https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B3eAMGXFw1o Can't Buy Me Love by The Beatles https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h3WJiqc_bEs Bills Bills Bills by Destiny's Child https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NiF6-0UTqtc Rich Girl by Hall and Oates https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oIAkRVBS-0U  

Money matters can be challenging terrain for many couples, often leading to heated arguments and unnecessary stress. Research consistently highlights the prevalence of issues arising from a lack of open communication about finances. How were you raised to approach the subject of money? Was it a common topic or a conversational taboo? Join TalkDoc, Meredith, and Teighlor as they unravel the complexities of financial discussions within relationships. In this episode, we explore the roots of financial communication education – or lack thereof – and its impact on current relationship dynamics. Discover the power of proactive stress management versus reactive stress when it comes to discussing finances. Listen to strategies for navigating these inevitable stress points, emphasizing the importance of addressing money matters outside the heat of a crisis. Tune in as we guide you through healthy ways to approach, articulate, and time your discussions about money with your partner. From strategies on staying informed and educated to incorporating productive language, we've got you covered. Ever thought about scheduling "money check-ins"? We explore this innovative approach as a pathway to fostering consistent and constructive communication about finances in your relationship. Don't let money be a stumbling block; turn it into a catalyst for deeper connection and understanding. Music by epidemic sound. SHOW NOTES: Resources :  marriage.com Top ten reasons for divorce from marriage.com https://www.marriage.com/advice/divorce/10-most-common-reasons-for-divorce/   Statistics on arguing about money: https://www.marketwatch.com/story/this-common-behavior-is-the-no-1-predictor-of-whether-youll-get-divorced-2018-01-10   Lack of Money Communication before marriage: https://www.prnewswire.com/news-releases/get-engaged-over-the-holiday-its-time-to-set-a-dateto-talk-about-money-300773761.html Tools :  Tips from WhiteBoard Finance (Youtube): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y4_CdtkcCxM Be honest / transparent (go over you assess and liabilities 401k vs student loans) Goals (shared not individual) 1. saving /emergencies 2. Travel 3. Taxes 4. House 5. Car 6. Insurance  Separate or joint (studies suggest joint = happier longer marriages) Hybrid put in same percent of income into shared expenses  Budget together recurring expenses No need to split 50/50. Maybe higher earner takes on bigger cost mortgage vs bills Max out tax advantages (401k) first  Regular Reviews (should meet regularly to go over goals, revisit shared goals and new goals) Monthly  Quarterly  Annually  TC4G (TRADING COMFORT FOR GROWTH) : Schedule and Have Regular Conversations about Money! Links : Episode 80 - Red Flags in Relationships and Dating! https://pod.link/afafwithtalkdoc/episode/04fba5aa22def91904d762e99f13460b

Ever felt like your attempts to listen were falling short? Do you find yourself inadvertently steering conversations in the wrong direction? We've all been there. Join your hosts, TalkDoc, Meredith, and Teighlor, as we navigate the nuances of effective listening and unravel responding errors that hinder our ability to truly connect with others. Communication breakdowns happen when we misinterpret the context or jump into problem-solving mode when someone simply needs an empathetic ear. Have you ever noticed the domino effect of someone tuning out when they feel unheard? It's a cycle we've all experienced. In this episode, we're not just scratching the surface—we're diving deep. Learn from real-life scenarios as we discuss nine common responding errors that can throw a conversation off course. Tune in for practical tips and strategies to enhance your listening skills. Discover how to break free from the cycle of communication breakdowns and foster deeper connections with those around you. Because when we truly listen, we not only hear words but also understand the emotions and stories behind them. Music by epidemic sound. SHOW NOTES: Experts :  Wolvin and Coakley Resources :   Listening Education https://www.listen.org/resources/Documents/LE%202011-2.pdf https://edge.sagepub.com/system/files/77593_5.1ref.pdf Responding Errors: Stage Hogging Overly Focusing on Details Creating Distractions Selectively Responding Interrupting Focusing on the Speaker's Delivery or Criticizing the Speaker Insensitive Responding Defensiveness Ambushing Links : Dave Barry's Complete Guide to Guys https://www.amazon.com/Dave-Barrys-Complete-Guide-Guys/dp/0449910261

Have you ever pondered the art of effective listening? Are you truly a master of the subtle yet essential skill of listening? Join TalkDoc, Meredith, and Teighlor as we dive deep into the world of listening. Discover the mechanics behind this underrated but vital aspect of communication. We'll explore the key elements of the listening process, as highlighted by communication experts Wolvin and Coakley: Hearing, Attending, Understanding (Comprehension), Remembering, and Responding. We shed light on the common pitfalls and errors in listening that can hinder our connections with others. From not paying attention and faking interest to the sneaky tactics of selective listening, insulated listening, insensitive listening, and ambushing, we'll help you identify and overcome these barriers to truly enrich your relationships.  Music by epidemic sound. SHOW NOTES: Experts :  Wolvin and Coakley, DeVito Resources :  Listening Education https://www.listen.org/resources/Documents/LE%202011-2.pdf https://edge.sagepub.com/system/files/77593_5.1ref.pdf Links : Episode #005: Shut Down Mode - How to Manage Stonewalling https://pod.link/afafwithtalkdoc/episode/100334e9de176a1fa5f53be4503458cf Episode #015: What the Phub! https://pod.link/afafwithtalkdoc/episode/49181892af68bd3170e025ea77a58de5 It's Not About the Nail https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-4EDhdAHrOg&t=3s

Grief is a universal emotion, yet it remains a topic shrouded in misunderstanding and discomfort. How do we navigate grief, and can we find new ways to understand, manage, and even grow through it? Join us as we embark on a transformative conversation with Arianna Caligiuri, who shares her profound insights and strategies to cope with grief. Join TalkDoc, Meredith, Teighlor, and Arianna, as we dive into unique approaches to grief management. Listen to Arianna explain how breathwork and physical movement effective tools for healing and processing grief can be. Discover how these practices can guide you through the labyrinth of emotions that grief often brings. But that's not all; Arianna also helps us understand the importance of our words and phrases when supporting those who are grieving. Learn why saying "Everything will be okay" or "Call me if you need me" may not always be the most helpful expressions of empathy and discover alternative ways to connect and be there for our loved ones in their times of need. This episode is a heartfelt exploration of grief, offering both solace and practical strategies for anyone navigating this complex and deeply personal journey. Join us as we find hope, healing, and meaningful connections in the face of grief. Music by epidemic sound. SHOW NOTES: Experts :  Brene Brown, David Kessler Resources :  Psalm 56:8 (NLT): “You keep track of all my sorrows. You have collected all my tears in your bottle. You have recorded each one in your book.” Brene Brown - Braving the Wilderness https://brenebrown.com/book/braving-the-wilderness/ Kessler - Finding Meaning: The Sixth Stage of Grief https://grief.com/sixth-stage-of-grief/ Tools :  Grief Day By Day https://www.griefdaybyday.com/ Links : https://www.ariannabythesea.com/

Have you ever found yourself at a loss for words when someone close to you is grieving? That initial encounter can be challenging. You might wonder what to say, how to provide support, or if you've been on the receiving end of condolences, perhaps you've felt unsupported or misunderstood. In this thought-provoking episode, your hosts, TalkDoc, Meredith, and Teighlor, engage in a heartfelt conversation with a special guest, David Leonard, the Executive Director of New Hope Grief Support Community. Together, they explore the multifaceted nature of grief, recognizing that each person's grieving process is as unique as a fingerprint. David poignantly describes grief as a beautiful mess, one that has the potential to evolve into a beautiful mosaic over time. David shares a powerful perspective: "Grieving people don't need to be fixed because they are not broken. They may be broken-hearted, but they are not broken." In this enlightening dialogue, we invite you to listen in and discover invaluable strategies to navigate your own journey through grief and to better support others during their times of mourning. Tune in to gain insights, empathy, and practical tools for fostering meaningful connections and communication in the face of grief. Together, we'll explore the transformative power of understanding and compassion in the midst of life's most challenging moments. Don't miss this episode—it's an essential guide for anyone seeking to navigate the complex terrain of grief with grace and wisdom. Music by epidemic sound. SHOW NOTES: Experts :  Elisabeth Kubler-Ross; Dr. William Worden; Edith Edgar Resources/Links:  New Hope Grief Support Community   https://www.newhopegrief.org/ Childhood Estimation Bereavement Model - Judy's House and Jag institute in Colorado https://judishouse.org/research-tools/cbem/cbem-reports/ What's Your Grief? On Instagram:  https://www.instagram.com/whatsyourgrief/?hl=en Modern Loss on Instagram:  https://www.instagram.com/modernloss/ National Alliance for Children Grieving (NACG):  https://nacg.org/ Camp Erin:  https://camperinparents.com/about-camp-erin/ Recommended Google Searches: “Grief support near me” “Grief Experience Camps near me”

Have you ever found yourself trapped in the aftermath of an unresolved situation or a lingering emotional burden from a past relationship? Did you ever wish there was a way to find closure and finally move forward? In this episode, TalkDoc, Meredith, and Teighlor dive into the intricacies of closure. We all have experienced those moments when someone hurt us, and they seemingly moved on effortlessly, leaving us stuck in a whirlwind of emotions. Closure is the key to liberating yourself from this emotional turmoil. Closure is not just about ending an emotional circumstance without pain or regret; it's about reclaiming your emotional well-being. Smith of marriage.com, who aptly defines closure as a “means ending an emotional circumstance without pain or regret. And it implies extricating ourselves from the emotional burden and no longer allowing the relationship to have any weight on our well-being.” Drawing from the work of psychologist Dr. Ahona Guha (2021), we explore the concept of closure into three essential tasks: 1) Understand the Situation, 2) Process the Difficult Feelings, and 3) Allow Time and Distance. Join us in this enlightening episode and embark on a journey towards closure that promises to empower you, lighten your emotional load, and help you pave the way to a brighter, more fulfilling future.   Music by epidemic sound. SHOW NOTES: Experts :  Dr. Ahona Guha - Psychology Today, Smith - marriage.com, Brene Brown - brenebrown.com Resources : https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/prisons-and-pathos/202106/how-find-psychological-closure https://www.marriage.com/advice/relationship/how-to-move-on-without-closure/ Links : Episode 11 : Self-Forgiveness - You Hold the Keys to the Cell You Occupy https://pod.link/afafwithtalkdoc/episode/91e8f9c4d10e7c0bf0efc0b27560dc35 Episode 10: Forgiveness 101 - How to Forgive Others https://pod.link/afafwithtalkdoc/episode/c587bdf876c3a40c7911fedba5dd51f8 Episode 21: Boundaries 101 - How to Say No! https://pod.link/afafwithtalkdoc/episode/8dc8625be3a918b62f8c9d16a1f888f9 LIST OF CLOSURE SONGS: Taylor Swift - “We are Never Ever Getting Back Together” https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WA4iX5D9Z64 Adele - “Someone Like You” https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hLQl3WQQoQ0 Destiny's Child - “Survivor” https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wmc8bQoL-J0 Gloria Gaynor - “I Will Survive” https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6dYWe1c3OyU Beatles - “Let it Be” https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HzvDofigTKQ Whitney Houston - “I Will Always Love You” https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3JWTaaS7LdU Disney - “Let It Go” https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=moSFlvxnbgk  

Have you ever heard of "beige flags" in the world of Relationships and Dating? Have you pondered over whether these seemingly mundane behaviors hold any significance in your relationships? Caitlin MacPhail, the TikToker, behind the term "beige flags," defines them as observed behaviors that might appear dull or peculiar. They neither fall into the good nor bad category but compel us to pause and ponder their implications. In this episode, we've invited Sammi Sanchez Gomez to join the AFAF Team to dive deep into the world of beige flags. Together, we explore instances where these subtle signals might seem inconsequential, but also discuss when these behaviors warrant closer examination. Join TalkDoc, Teighlor, Meredith, and Sammi, as we unpack the true significance of beige flags. We'll equip you with valuable knowledge and practical tools to cultivate meaningful relationships. Discover the beauty of recognizing the idiosyncrasies in potential partners and nurturing the potential for a bright and fulfilling future together.  Music by epidemic sound. SHOW NOTES: Experts :  Caitlin MacPhail, Daniel Sloss Tools :  Perception Checking Links : Episode 26: Perception Checking https://pod.link/afafwithtalkdoc/episode/e88afc79091effdacde749d121496fe6

In this episode, we explore various green flags that can guide us towards building successful relationships. We examine those positive signs that indicate a relationship has the potential to thrive and grow. We offer insights into the possibility of healthy and fulfilling connections with another person. By learning to identify these green flags in others, we can empower ourselves to make informed decisions about our romantic prospects. Furthermore, we acknowledge that personal growth and self-reflection play a crucial role in creating and maintaining healthy connections. Join TalkDoc, Teighlor, and Meredith as we unpack the significance of green flags, equipping you with the knowledge and tools to foster meaningful relationships. Discover the joy of recognizing positive indicators in potential partners and nurturing the potential for a bright and fulfilling future together. Music by epidemic sound. SHOW NOTES: Experts :  Kelly Green, Shanita Brown, Amanda Chatel Resources :  Article on Green Flags by Amanda Chatel: https://www.self.com/story/relationship-green-flags Four Couples Married More than 50 Years Spill Secret to Long-Lasting Love:  https://abcnews.go.com/Lifestyle/couples-married-longer-50-years-spill-secret-long/story?id=45222748 StrengthsFinder 2.0: https://store.gallup.com/p/en-us/10385/strengthsfinder-2.0-(hardcover) Links : https://www.drshanitabrown.com/ https://www.kellyegreen.com/ Previous AFAF Episodes on Boundaries: https://pod.link/afafwithtalkdoc/episode/c6b431c4b18335a1759db7588986fd0d https://pod.link/afafwithtalkdoc/episode/8dc8625be3a918b62f8c9d16a1f888f9 https://pod.link/afafwithtalkdoc/episode/04a05256443fa4baabf2b3dcbfcc32d9  

Have you ever found yourself pondering the subtle indications that something might not be quite right in your relationships and dating experiences? Those cautionary yellow flags that discreetly wave, urging us to pay attention to underlying concerns as the relationship progresses. These yellow flags serve as early warnings, signaling that there is some essential work to be done within the relationship, and if left unattended, they may evolve into more pronounced red flags. In this thought-provoking episode, the insightful trio of TalkDoc, Meredith, and Teighlor embark on an engaging exploration of Yellow Flags in Relationships and Dating. Drawing upon the wisdom of renowned researcher John Gottman, they delve into the profound concept of the "four horsemen," which are destructive communication patterns that can erode the foundation of any relationship. By shining a light on these horsemen, they empower listeners to recognize and address potential pitfalls before they escalate. With compassion and expertise, our hosts carefully examine the wide array of warning signs that may manifest in relationships and dating scenarios. From subtle changes in behavior and communication patterns to a growing sense of emotional disconnect, they dissect the intricate tapestry of yellow flags, offering keen insights and practical strategies to navigate these treacherous waters. Moreover, this illuminating discussion delves into the pivotal question of when and why one might choose to terminate a relationship because of these warning signs. By exploring the delicate balance between self-preservation and relationship growth, our hosts provide listeners with invaluable guidance on recognizing the tipping point where the journey together becomes untenable. Tune in and join us for this pivotal and transformative conversation as we unravel the intricacies of Yellow Flags in Relationships and Dating. Gain a deeper understanding of these signals, learn to communicate effectively, and embrace the tools necessary for building healthy and thriving connections. Don't miss out on this essential episode that could reshape your approach to relationships and lead you towards a path of lasting fulfillment. Music by epidemic sound. SHOW NOTES: Experts :  Dr. Nicole LePera, Dr. John Gottman, Dr. Zand, Dr. Jill Weber, Vanessa Trine Resources :  https://www.gottman.com/ https://theholisticpsychologist.com/ https://www.forbes.com/health/mind/relationship-red-flags/ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/having-sex-wanting-intimacy/202206/5-ways-tell-its-time-relationship-end Links to Previous AFAF Episodes: Episode #061: Stop Criticizing! How to Properly Complain without Blame https://pod.link/afafwithtalkdoc/episode/af635ca774c6d2e6773cb13662cceeab Episode #002: Ah, Defensiveness - How to Manage Defensiveness https://pod.link/afafwithtalkdoc/episode/7006e63c9ed15961a921e4843f717078 Episode #064: AFAF Real Talk - Don't Be So Defensive! It's Me Not You! https://pod.link/afafwithtalkdoc/episode/c4d53cbcdc7bf08bf8a8e41c3abb9723 Episode #005: Shut Down Mode - How to Manage Stonewalling https://pod.link/afafwithtalkdoc/episode/100334e9de176a1fa5f53be4503458cf Episode #012: AFAF with Shardasia LeDay on How to Reconcile https://pod.link/afafwithtalkdoc/episode/fdae1ec8e31fb65c2c8cb34c429f148e Episode #062: AFAF with Vanessa Trine on Anxiety and How It Translates into the Body https://pod.link/afafwithtalkdoc/episode/0ea8856c22092ff47e49a366594e1a66

Red flags are warning signs that indicate potential problems and sometimes even dangerous situations in relationships. Red flags are easier to spot in other people's relationships than our own. Whether it is avoiding difficult conversations, frequently referencing former relationships, displaying inappropriate levels of emotion or other potentially dysfunctional behavior, red flags are important to identify and address.  In this episode, TalkDoc, Teighlor, and Meredith identify red flags in relationships. We discuss common red flags and strategies for helping ourselves and others when they appear. Join us for this important conversation! Music by epidemic sound. SHOW NOTES: Experts :  Kelman, Zand, Martin, Gillis, Samuels, Weber Resources :  https://www.forbes.com/health/mind/relationship-red-flags/ https://psychcentral.com/blog/imperfect/2018/11/11-relationship-red-flags-and-why-we-ignore-them#Why-do-we-ignore-red-flags? https://www.kaytlyngillislcsw.com/ https://journals.ntu.ac.uk/index.php/litc/article/view/417 Links: Gaslighting Episode 23 (Part 1): https://pod.link/afafwithtalkdoc/episode/172b1da84e9ef9e99153bd3d3622698b Gaslighting Episode 24 (Part 2): https://pod.link/afafwithtalkdoc/episode/3a5b4efae31991c46b80678dfad86f9f National Domestic Violence Hotline The National Domestic Violence Hotline (USA) at 1-800-799-7233, or National Domestic Violence Helpline (UK) at 0808 2000 247 Above all else, know that you deserve a safe, healthy relationship. If you're experiencing any form of relationship abuse, you can reach the National Domestic Violence Hotline 24 hours a day, seven days a week by calling 1-800-799-SAFE, texting START to 88788, or messaging a real person via live chat at thehotline.org “We accept the love we think we deserve” - The Perks of Being a Wallflower