Hilarious daily, progressive, internet radio show about politics, news, pop culture, atheism and life in general. WARNING: Sometimes brutal liberal atheist humor. Not for fragile flowers. CrabDiving are comedian/actor/writer Ryan Pfeiffer, and actor/writer Patrick Viall, who live and work in Flor…
Our conservative SCOTUS from Hell is gunning for all that is good. The crappy Supremes gutted the EPA's power to fight climate change. The court did allow Biden to end the era policy, “remain in Mexico.” Vile Justice Thomas cited a debunked claim about stem cells and how vaccines are made from aborted children. An adult judge offered Floridians seeking abortion temporary relief by blocking a 15 week ban. Man-baby poo-poo'd the testimony of Cassidy Hutchinson to the Select Committee investigating the insurrection by saying she was mad because he didn't offer her a gig in Mar a Lago. Podcaster and science denier Joe Rogan endorsed wanker Ron DeSantis for President in 2024. Fascist Putin moob-shamed leaders at the G7 after UK Prime Minister Boris Johnson suggested everyone getting naked. Actor and under-medicated Jon Voight called for Biden's impeachment. Cretin Rep Marjorie Taylor Greene called crapped on NATO and then blathered dumb crap about Russia. The Senate President in Colorado rolled out legislation to legalize magic shrooms!
Trump wanted to join his insurrectionist rioters at the Capitol. We also learned from the testimony of Mark Meadows' former aid Cassidy Hutchinson that Shitler hurled his dinner upon The White House kitchen's wall after hearing Barr proclaim there was no fraud in 2020. The select committee concluded the late June hearing by hinting witness tampering might be afoot. The VP bizarrely walked back a statement about her 2024 election plans. The criminal AG of Texas promised he would re-examine Texas sodomy laws. R Kelly got 30 years for his horrifically evil sex trafficking/ dungeon crimes. The czar of Florida is closing in on man-baby in 2024 election polls. Am indicted election fraudster got 1/3 of the vote in a Colorado GOP primary. Raphael Warnock increased his lead over former baller and bigly liar Herschel Walker. Another wave of Rona is coming. Also, there's a gross pig-passed virus making the rounds in corporate styes. None of the “most live-able cities” are in the US.
Obviously some radical religious SCOTUS judges perjured themselves in their hearings.Justice Clarence Thomas wants the court to go after marriage equality and contraception next. The nearly strung up Mike Pence called for a national ban on abortion following the Supremes' ruling. Rapist President Donald Trump also called for a national ban on abortion. Sad senators Joe Manchin and Susan Collins pretended to feel betrayed by the ruling. The retail store Patagonia said they would pay the legal costs for any employee arrested daring abortion protests. Conservative religious wankers have their nether regions in a dither over Christian nationalism. AOC shredded Marjorie Taylor Greene on Twitter over stupid crap the dimwitted loon from Georgia said about forced birth protests. Former fox foo Glenn Beck carried on about California and New York becoming abortion mills. Another FOX load Stuart Varney complained about the morals of corporations that have offered to pay travel expenses for employees seeking abortions. Human cosplayer Jesse Watters said the outrage over the killing of Roe was overblown.
The Feds finally started executing search warrants on Trump's sedition toadies. Federal agents also seized the Nevada GOP Chairman's phone as part of an investigation into the fraudulent electors. SCOTUS crapped out a crappy decision about a New York gun control law. The highest court also got away with cop's having to read Miranda rights. America's confidence in the Supreme Court has never been lower. Universal healthcare would've saved many that died during the pandemic in the U.S. Filthy rep Matt Gaetz groveled for a pardon spanning throughout all of time. Trumpkin Rep. Lauren Boebert will have to find a new home for her gun-themed restaurant since her landlord kicked her out. Trump has been rage-watching the January 6th hearings. The largest Burmese python ever was nabbed in Florida. A senatorial candidate pulled an political ad that advocated the hunting down of “RINOs.” For the first time since the Civil War, all the planets in our solar system have aligned.
GOP seditionists tried to foist fake elections into the electoral certification. Election workers Shaye Moss and Ruby Freeman recounted the hell they went through after being targeted by Trump over lies or election fraud. Profoundly dumb Senator Ron Paul tried to play a part in the Big Lie by offering to ferry alternate electoral votes to the Senate. Republican January 6th Committee member Adam Kinzinger and his family have received tons of violent threats from MAGATS. The Democrats are divided over how to make gases prices lower. Polio has been found in UK crap. Brexit has been horrific for the Britains. Dominion Voting Systems got the go ahead to bring a defamation lawsuit against Fox. Religious wanker Todd Starnes returned to the podcast spewing lies about Trump supporters physically beaten by progressives in 2016. A toothless gun control bill was passed by Congress. An Uvalde officer was restrained by fellow coos and not allowed to rescue his wife, one of the teachers killed by the gunman. Chicago piggies are no longer allowed to chase non-violent suspects on foot. A growing percentage of higher earning workers have been living paycheck to paycheck. Former Florida gubernatorial candidate Andrew Gillum was indicted on fraud charges related to a campaign fundraiser.
Hate-filled American religious zealots are driving a huge increase in atheism. The Governor of Montana dined in Italy to while his constituents drowned. Vince McMahon stepped down from the WWE after news broke the former wrestling CEO involved in a sexual assault scandal involving hush money. Beto has gained on Abbott in the Texas gubernatorial polls. A House Democrat righteously called for SCOTUS Thomas to resign. A lawmaker in the UK called out his government for illegally pulling out of an agreement related to Brexit. GOP demon John Cornyn was booed after signing a very modest gun control bill. Mexico is preparing for a wave of Americans seeking abortion after Roe is gone. GA senatorial candidate Herschel Walker told sleepy Ben Carson celebrities should stop telling us not to do things. Wee Kenneth Copeland wrongly reminded us vitamin C was a COVID cure and then the god-bot blessed his flock via public airwaves. A JEEBUS freak said childbirth will make you hate gay people. A Trumpist running in South Carolina blathered grooming and indoctrination should be punishable by death. The idiot leader of the Patriot Front complained about his arrest and jailing for attempting to attack a pride event.
Herschel Walker children are popping up like weeds. The January 6th Committee said they'd demand communications about the insurrection between Ginni Thomas and her husband. Trump called Pence the “P word” which upset Ivanka. Shitler waddled out on Truth Social and demanded equal time to lay out his case of how he actually won in 2020. EGOT actor James Earl Jones will once again voice Darth Vader in a Star Wars series. Pillow fascist Mike Lindell on Bannon's gross podcast that Walmart was stabbing him in the back by refusing to carry his pillows. Czar DeSantis accepted the endorsement of tech ghoul Elon Musk and then thanked him in the form of a racist quip. Mega loon prophet Kat Cerr announced all Jews accept Jesus right before they croak. The Crabs learned all about a turd that who organizes anti-Muslim hate groups in different communities.
GOP reps are scrambling to explain their strange Capitol tours on the day before Trump's coup attempt. Representative Loudermilk was busted on camera giving tours to insurrectionists. Shitler released a rambling 12 page response to the hearings about January 6th. Former baller, current creationist and Georgia Senatorial candidate Herschel Walker has a secret love child and also lied about being in law enforcement. Subpoenas have been served in a probe into a breach of Georgia election systems. Blotch Nazi Bannon called out former AG Bill Barr for his testimony to the January 6th Committee. The weighty fascist insurrectionist was also disappointed by a judge who refused to dismiss a case brought against him. The wee brained Rep Marjorie Taylor Greene blamed a make believe tampon shortage on transgender folks. The Canadian military hired a humanist chaplain. A bunch blow hidden amongst bananas was mistakenly delivered to a grocery store Big-time author James Patterson blathered ignorant crap about straight white writers having a tough go at it. The Crabs reviewed a ridiculous luxury world travel package with Disney priced at 110 K but you must share a hotel room. in men's bathrooms for trans people.
Today's Jan. 6th committee hearing was all about inebriated Rudy Giuliani. Trump conned his minions out of 250 million bucks over an election defense fund that didn't exist. Don Jr.'s mate, Guilfoyle was paid 60k for a two minute speech at the rally prior to the riot. In Idaho, a plot to violently disrupt a pride event by the evil Patriot Front was foiled by the FBI. The vile GOP in South Dakota threatened to fiddle with their referendum system in an effort to subvert the will of voters. During the hearings, Bill Barr dissed and then laughed at the doc, 200 Mules. The Crabs reviewed a plan to replace some cops with mental health professionals. We played 911 calls from Karens and Kens regarding a first amendment auditor holding a sign with Joe Biden's face on a giant wang.
Barr called BS on Trump's fraud claims and Ivanka agreed with him. Human cosplayer Jared Kushner said when Trump's lawyers threatened to quit amid the coup he thought they were whining. Man-baby raged over Bill Bart's testimony at the insurrection hearing. The Secretary of State candidate from Cali with supposed magical JEEBUS powers who lost bigly is claiming she actually won. Ginni Thomas, wife of Clarence, was all up in Arizona trying to steal the state for Shitler. Cretins from Texas sued a family for getting their kid hormone therapy. A Florida man mistook a gator for a dog and lost a chunk of leg. Bieber has been suffering from facial paralysis. A Gieco customer caught HPV in her car AB's her insurance covered the medical expense. A three year old survived a bite from a copperhead and a Floridian didn't die after a cottonmouth bite. A sloth bear massacred a couple.
Complicit Republicans are desperate to distract from the Jan. 6th hearings. Gas prices have soared bigly. A cop in Michigan was indicted for shooting an unarmed black man. Also in Michigan, a GOP gubernatorial candidate was arrested for his crimes. A losing GOP Secretary of State candidate prayed for votes and was aided by visions seen by her magical son. Rotund fascist Alex Jones had turned on his own lawyers. A camp in Cali closed over pre-Nazi swastika wall hanging. Diddler Matt Gaetz blathered bull crap about the insurrection. A vile white nationalist said it'd be cool if DC or New York were nuked. MAGAT candidate Mark Burns said anyone promoting “LGBTQ indoctrination” should be executed. Nazi hephalump MTG said the rights of the January 6th rioters were being fragrantly denied. Word salad tosser Louie Gohmert said lack of prayer was to blame for mass shootings.
Vile gun lobbyists slithered into a congressional hearing on gun laws reform. The guy that went after Kavanaugh was arrested. Representative Katie Porter schooled an empty headed conservative activist on gun control. A student who survived the Uvalde shooting testified to Congress and said she was worried it would happen again. Republican load Scalise blathered that after 911, we didn't ban planes. Another dumb GOP rep then blamed school shootings on the overuse of smartphones. We learned former White House Comm Director Hope Hicks broke Shitler's heart because she didn't support the big lie. Hate-caster Stew Peters made a pilgrimage to the site of the pizzagate conspiracy theory. GOP Loser Kandiss Taylor called on her supporters to sign affidavits stating they indeed voted for her. A wanker running for office in Oklahoma earned his homophobia merit badge. A clip surfaced of conservative serpent Milo praising Putin for his hatred and persecution of gay people. News broke that Trump May join the Reawaken America Tour.
Democrats are going Hollywood for the January 6th hearings. Boris Johnson avoided a no confidence vote to continue his crappy UK reign. The mom who outsmarted the cops loitering at the Uvalde masa shooting was threatened with a parole violation if she spoke to the media. Senator Warnock used a ridiculous clip of Herschel Walker selling a fraudulent COVID treatment in a campaign ad. Evil troll Milo Yiannopoulos took a job in GOP nazi Marjorie Taylor Greene's office. Texas wants to banned drag shows for kids. SCOTUS Amy Coney Barrett was part of a gross abusive cult. Florida czar Ron DeSantis wants to ban political dissent in universities. Thug cops watched a man drown.
Republicans are training partisan goons to act as election judges. OPEC Alliance boosts oil production as energy prices soar. The Amber Heard/ Johnny Depp will silence survivors of abuse. GOP hero and murderer Kyle Rittenhouse is inspired by the Depp verdict. The Rolling Stones open their 60th Anniversary tour and the losers at Drudge can't resist a dumb pun. Old hardened drinkers recover faster from surgery. Hounds are better at detecting COVID than a rapid test. Trump lunatic Lin Wood has launched an attack upon MAGA VIP Mike Lindell. A Republican Rep was booed off stage while attempting to turn a commencement speech into a gross Trump rally. MAGAT Nazis will be manning polling places located in diverse areas for the next election.
There's a war, a pandemic, and daily gun massacres, but today's biggest news was Johnny Depp's "win.” Janet Yellen said she was wrong about inflation. A Proud Boy Trumpkin was refused entry to a Shitler rally because he was wearing a shirt with a Proud Boy logo. BoJo wants the UK to revert to an outdated system of measure. The Police Chief refusing to cooperate with the Feds investigation into the Ulvade shooting was sworn into his new city council job. In an epic When Animals Get Pissed segment, Pat and Ryan learn about a python lurking near the fryer at a Sonic Burger, a bison attacking a human and launching the person into the air at Yellowstone. People are getting killed by tiger attacks in India at an alarming rate. A swimmer survived a shark attack by turning in an Oscar-worthy performance as a corpse, and a cougar only partially mauled a human. Dandy pastor Greg Locke had a show canceled after the venue was pressured by decent people to cancel the loon.
It's starting to look like Durham may not be sending Obama and Hillary to GITMO. Trump raged about Hillary's lawyer being cleared. An ultra-conservative Georgia GOP gubernatorial candidate won't concede even though she lost by 70 points. JEEBUS loon Kirk Cameron released a weird flick about homeschooling. Evil MTG blathered bizarre crap abort Bill Gates and “peach tree dishes.” Former Georgia running back Herschel Walker is angry-pants Trump is taking credit for his decision to run for Senate. Iran has enough uranium to build a nuke. Republican candidate JD Vance said he'd go after pornography if elected. Ivermectin cheerleader Joe Rogan praised FOX News for always having his back. The oppressive Texas social media law was put on hold by adults.
Twisted GOP cultists blame leftists and demons for the latest shooting massacre. The Uvalde Police delayed the Border Patrol entering the school and taking out the shooter. Trump bemoaned the “repulsive” calls for gun control and read the names of the victims of the Uvalde school shooting at the NRA convention in Houston. Gun fapper Ted Cruz blathered crap about arming up the schools and allowing only one door in and out. Dumbest Senator on the planet Ron Johnson blamed wokeness and teaching “CRT” for creating school shootings. A RWNJ said the Uvalde shooter was controlled by a demon. A Republican House candidate blamed teachers for the shooting. The book Gender Queer was banned in Florida schools. A Georgia grand jury is sending out subpoenas for the election fraud case from 2020.
Uvalde police tactics are being questioned after the school massacre. Senator Ted Cruz got all tongue tied over a question from a Brit reporter over gun control. The NRA is still meeting in Houston despite the recent school shooting. Goodfellas acting legend Ray Liotta died. Civil rights activist and former NFL player Colin Kaepernick has a chance to quarterback for Las Vegas Raider. Upon retirement Tom Brady is promised a lucrative broadcasting deal. Senatorial candidate Herschel Walker blathered incoherencies about gun violence, the Bible, men watching women on social media. Former Trump Chief of Staff Mark Meadows burnt documents in his office at The White House according to testimony from his assistant. Hate-caster Stew Peters and homophobic Front Line fraud doc Stella Emmanuel agreed that homosexuality should be against the law. Man-baby is angry pants over Kellyanne Conway admitting he didn't win the 2020 election. A GOP gubernatorial primary candidate wants to bring the electoral college to Colorado state wide elections. Heinous GOP Senators blocked domestic terrorism legislation. Five of the six GOP gubernatorial candidates in Michigan were kicked out of the race over election fraud. OAN host and Iran Contra player said some dumb crap about guns relating to the mass shooting in Uvalde, Texas. FOX bot Jesse Waters blamed critical race theory for gun violence. Disgraced actor Kevin Spacey was charged with sexual assault across the pond.
Beto O'Rourke crashed NRA puppet Greg Abbott's press conference. An elite level Border Patrol agent killed the mass shooter in Texas. Body language tech and MAGAT Rep Paul Gosar blathered something transphobic in response to the horrific shooting in Uvalde. On January 6th, the “hang Mike Pence” chants put Trump in his happy place. Georgia Senatorial candidate Herschel Walker mumbled an incomprehensible response to a reporter's question about the masa shooting at the Texas elementary school. Senator Sinema said a bunch of meaningless crap about the shooting. Not that he cares, but DINO Manchin also had no solutions about gun violence. The sharks are circling fascist Putin in Moscow. Margaret Atwood released a fire-proof copy of “The Handmaid's Tale.” Fireman prophet Mark Taylor shared a ridiculous theory involving the baby formula shortage, the destruction of Roe, and DC's demonic possession by fetus-chowing Baal. The Southern Baptist church released an epic list of child molesters within their organization. A pastor admitted to his flock he committed adultery but failed to mention it was with a minor. “Christian” Josh Duggar was sentenced to 12 years for sending and receiving child pornography.
A new billionaire is created daily while 1 million will fall into poverty every 33 hours. Biden said he would intervene militarily to defend Taiwan from China. Monkeypox was spread via EU sex raves. Australia voted out their crappy conservative for the first time in a decade. Trump shared a post fapping over a civil war on Truth Social created by a fellow fascist. Frontline quack doc raged about how President Biden, Bill Gates and Speaker Pelosi have been replaced by demonic clones. Transphobic comic Dave Chappelle made a surprise appearance at a John Mulaney show. Thousands of dollars worth of snakes were lifted from a pet store. Flamboyant mega preacher Greg Locke turned in a compelling sermon where he asked the IRS to take away his church's tax exempt status.
Trump-backed GOP candidate in Michigan wants to ban all birth control. A flight attendant from Space X's fleet accused the tech bro of brandishing his ween during an in-flight massage. The mega donor that runs Oracle is a massive insurrectionist. Ginni Thomas, wife of SCOTUS ahole Clarence, sent off flurries of emails in an attempt to switch the electors in Arizona. The GOP gubernatorial candidate in Pennsylvania penned a Hitlerian thesis that should make him an even less appealing choice. The CEO of a forced birth group blathered something about fetuses fueling street lamps during a congressional hearing. Pillow loon Lindell waddled to Alabama to file frivolous crap about the 2020 election. A Virginia school board is considering restoring the names of schools in the area to their old confederate general names.
The PAC that published the Cawthorn video is now going after Boebert. Pillow Nazi Mike Lindell triggered yet another investigation when he tossed 800 grand at a politician's defense fund for voter fraud shenanigans. Rising COVID cases caused Biden to encourage Americans to don masks again. Moody Madison Cawthorn threw shade at the candidate that bested him in the primary and warned of a “dark MAGA” uprising. A judge tossed a suit brought by Mike Lindell against Smartmatic for many many reasons. A judge said no to a proposed Tennessee law requiring to businesses to post a notice if they have gender neutral bathrooms. “W” said the war in Iraq was unjust. Potential Trump Media investors legally must be warned of Trump's lengthy bankruptcy history. Republican wanker MTG blamed people using WIC for the baby formula shortage. In an extended When Animals Get Pissed segment, a massive gator invaded a Floridian's pool, we learned about the sprawling and vast spider market, and snakes have systematically attacking humans.
We all get to say bye Felicia to Madison Cawthorn. Tech load Elon Musk announced he's super angry-pants at the Dems. A crackpot legislator from Arizona suggested the Buffalo mass shooter was a Fed perpetrating a false flag op. Golfer Trumpkin Jack Nicklaus complained about the PGA Tour canceling Trump's courses. Man-Baby's administration violated the Whistleblower Act by retaliating against Colonel Yevgeny Vindman for speaking out over the infamous Ukraine call. A racist school bus driver refused to drive students home for speaking Spanish. Cases of monkeypox are showing up in the States. GOP idiot Louie Gohmert embraced his full ignorance while questioning a forced birth crusader during a hearing over Roe. Lazy brained Louie along with another GOP kraken has also been lobbying the DOJ on behalf of imprisoned insurrectionists. A judge halted a West Virginia city council from continuing to open meetings with the Lord's Prayer. Lots of far right Nazi wankers have migrated to Idaho.
The US should just change its name to “Mass-Shooting Land.” Blotch-Nazi Steve Bannon blathered crap about replacement theory and the shooting in Buffalo on his dumb podcast. SCOTUS handed the anti-Democracy forces another win regarding campaign financings. There was a mass shooting at a church in Cali. The Big Apple is putting back COVID restrictions as cases rise. While speaking about the baby formula shortage, GOP load Elise Stefanik referred to Dems as "pedo grifters" but couldn't back it up with facts. Showman and Bible thumper Greg Locke might've screwed up his church's tax exempt status when he said you can't vote Democrat and be a Christian. A Lyft driver took a stand against casual racism. Ancient televangelist Kenneth Copeland filled us in on his latest private jet woes. The Crabs played the audio of body cam footage of Georgia cops being really really racist.
Pence is out stumping for Kemp in Georgia.Israeli cops terrorized mourners at the funeral for a Palestinian journalist. During the pandemic, the meat industry duped the dummies at the Trump administration into buying into a nonexistent meat shortage and nearly 300 workers died from COVID. A Tulsa school is cursed with an evil conservative teacher preaching forced birth crap. Climate change has a caused a lake near Vegas to dry up revealing bodies in barrels murdered in the seventies. There was a Mother's Day mishap involving thong roses at an elementary school. A town promised to remove in god we trust from their cop mobiles. Infamously stupid Senator Ron Johnson's base is hardening while his mass appeal goes super limp. Parents of transgender teens are the subject of baseless child abuse investigations. Don Jr. got all geeked out and raged about Biden on a webcam. Who knew that calling someone in the UK a “bald c-word” is sexual harassment.
GOP senators refused to protect women's rights. DINO dirtbag Manchin said no on Roe. In a moment of cringe, South Carolina celebrated confederate war Memorial Day. Republican insurrectionist Josh Howley drafted feckless legislation attacking Disney's trademarks. As part of a settlement, conservative news network OAN had to admit their was no election fraud in Georgia. Capitol rioter Baked Alaska talked himself out of a plea deal and into trial. Broadway legend Patti Lupone told an audience member incorrectly wearing a mask to exit stage left. A Pentecostal cult killed a three year old during an exorcism. A Mississippi educator was unjustly fired for explaining the meaning of “LGBTQ” and what it means to be nonbinary to a student. Former boxer and convicted rapist Mike Tyson beat a fellow passenger on a plane even though the celeb regularly takes toad venom.
GOP states will use every dirty trick to spy on women getting abortions. Cocaine Mitch wants a nation wide forced birth policy. Repubs declared on birth control. POTUS has sent arms and tanks to Ukraine via a lend/ lease program. Tech oligarch Elon Musk is worried Russia is coming for him. Zelensky honored the bomb sniffing wonder dog Patron for finding f-tons of bombs and Justin Trudeau bore witness. Conservative monster Stew Peters, former actor, bounty Hunter and cop impersonator, campaigned for a GOP troll in Idaho who voices the “w” in the word sword. Shitler's Mother's Day message was laden with insults, mean and completely in character. Obama and Biden tweeted out heartfelt Mother's Day statements. Dinesh D'Souza moobed slapped Tucker Carlson over Newsmax doc about the election. Infowars Czar Alex Jones lost his marbles over a caller who invoked Q.
Louisiana religious extremists want to imprison women who get an abortion. Another embarrassing video surfaced of Republican party boy Madison Cawthorn. Florida taxpayers are suing DeathSantis over the hike in their property taxes due to the war with Disney. A self proclaimed prophet explained Shitler's covefe moment and managed to tie in the 5G conspiracy theory. Forced birth activist nearly squirted over abortion related arrests and marveled upon the fetal heartbeat bill. Right wing ghoul Tony Perkins told followers to work and teach in public schools but then said their Christian demon spawn should attend private schools. Residents in Nantucket are voting on topless equality at the beach. In a brutal When Animals Get Pissed segment a baby copperhead slithered into a Longhorn Steakhouse and nearly murdered a patron with its poison filled fangs. In Florida, a gator broke into a garage and guzzled a case of Diet Coke. A pack of wild dogs in Alabama mauled a woman to death tasked with investigating the lethal pack. Deadly snakes occupied a COVID testing facility down under. An ornery Florida golfer raged at his neighbor walking his dog on the green and shot him in the ankle. The grumpy old man also beat the dude with a golf club. COVID is coming back.
The GOP are gunning for LGBTQ people and contraception after they destroy women's rights. Vice President Kamala Harris gave SCOTUS and the GOP what-for over the gutting of Roe. President Biden spoke out against the ban saying these Republicans are the most extreme American political party in recent history. Cretin Senator Marsha Blackburn warned the Dems may pack the court. AOC called out Lisa Murkowski and Susan Collins for their hypocritical victimhood over the leaked abortion decision. While in The White House, Shitler doctored intel docs that showed Russia interference in the 2016 election. Diddler Matt Gaetz blathered ignorant crap about millennials protesting the abortion ban and the Twitter-verse took care of him. A police thug was charged for the murder of a 12 year old. Pillow Czar Lindell slithered back on Twitter despite his ban and was promptly chased away. A white supremacist load from The Blaze said non-whites should show greater appreciation to whites.
The January 6th Committee wants to talk to Dr. Feelgood and Mo Brooks. Former Trump Defense Secretary Esper has penned a book about his time in The White House that includes a behind the scenes account of Shitler's administration during the Black Lives Matter protests. Mad Vlad could have cancer and or Parkinson's. The Crabs played a wild clip of Don Jr. promoting the Trump Gold Card. Man-baby screwed up the name of the MAGAT candidate he's supporting in Ohio. SCOTUS said Boston could fly a Christian flag. Supreme Infowarrior Alex Jones is in the midst of a bizarre bankruptcy maneuver to get out of a lawsuit brought by the Sandy Hook parents. Trumpkin Jared Kushner scribbled out a book no one should read. For employees living in Handmaid's Tale states, Amazon said they'd pay for transportation for an abortion. Racist Rep. Marjorie Taylor Greene blathered some inane crap about welfare. Man-baby's infamous phone call demanding votes from Kemp might get heard be a grand jury. Mexico cut Texas out of a rail line going to Canada because they can't trust the state GOP leadership to be sane.
It's awesome that Roger Stone has sunk to slinging satanic portal conspiracy theories. Tech stocks crapped the bed. GOP lunatics Lauren Boebert and Marjorie Taylor Greene neatly came to blows in a DC GOP hangout. Latin countries are seeing a decline in Catholicism. GOP diaper load Madison Cawthorn was caught on tape handling the wang of a staffer who might also be his cousin. Supremely corrupt former AG Bill Barr said Trump shouldn't run in 2024. The Crabs read many more messages between Mark Meadows and Sean Hannity. The SCOTUS heard a case of coach getting fired for praying on the field.
Moronic Republicans still believe there are litter boxes in schools for furry kids. Biden promises an answer on student debt soon. A right wing nut job in the UK claimed someone in the Labour Party kept crossing and uncrossing their legs in an attempt to distract Boris Johnson. The blonde dude from princess bride was bitten on the middle finger by a rattlesnake. A Republican from Tennessee said he would burn books banned from school libraries. The 45th president said he wouldn't be returning to Twitter even if Elon extends an invitation. Tech oligarch musk said he would fix Coca-Cola by putting the cocaine back in the recipe in an effort to be funny. Bloch Nazi Steve Bannon doesn't understand why Purdue isn't beating Kemp in Georgia. Representative Jamie Raskin tore Marjorie Taylor Greene a new pooper by calling her a Putin cheerleader.
Pence was afraid of getting black-vanned out of DC on January 6th. DeSantis might not be able to kill Disney. The Euro wind industry has been smacked with hack attacks. One in five species of reptiles may become extinct due to climate change including cobras. Dumb MAGATS said dumb crap at a dumb Trump rally. Vlad said he may nuke the west. The US and Russia exchanged some prisoners. JEEBUS load Shane Vaughn reminded us god chose Shitler. A Repub running for office was busted beating his wife. Horrific legislator Marjorie Taylor Greene said the Catholic Church is being run by Satan and pedos. Conservative doofus Louie Gohmert bizarrely defended insurrectionist-curious SCOTUS Clarence Thomas.
Robber barons rise again as Elon Musk buys Twitter. The tweeting platform is biased against lies at least for now. France didn't elect the Nazi. Former Dancing With the Stars cast member and Trump cabinet member sent some pro insurrection texts to Meadows claiming it was his “bag.” People are becoming resistant to antibiotics thanks to Rona symptoms and bad doctoring. Fascist Marjorie Taylor Greene called for martial law in a text to Meadows on January 6th but spelled it wrong. Thugs in blue in Phoenix jailed Black Lives Matter protestors and accused them of being in a made up gang. A gaggle of gross Nazis in Montana are seeking new members. The Pillow Czar Lindell is back spewing his same old mouth garbage. Debby Harry brought the house down in Glasgow.
Authoritarian turd Ron DeSantis will screw Florida taxpayers with his war on Disney. Bombshell audio of GOP ninny Kevin McCarthy saying he was planning on asking Trump to resign after the insurrection surfaced. Two Atlanta poll workers settled a defamation case against OAN. Alex Jones' attorney was recorded saying the n-word in a less than hilarious comedy set. Former Secretary of State Mike Pompeo may have accidentally blurted out the truth. Anti-Semitic Rep Marjorie Taylor Greene was roasted during court. A Kentucky teen recovers from shark attack and says he's can't wait to get back in there. Christian nationalists in Oklahoma gathered to spread the big lie. The Federalist ran an article saying the resurrection was the most well documented historical event.
Trump waddled angrily out of an interview with Piers Morgan. Starbuck workers in Virginia have been winning union votes. Pillow Czar Mike Lindell teased yet another smoking gun-level info dump proving Trump won 2020. Repub Marjorie Taylor Greene appeared freaked out over testifying in an upcoming trial. Oddly, Roger Stone released a video of himself whispering negative comments about DeSantis to Trump. The Colorado Governor chided DeathSantis for his fascist policies and welcomed Disney to his state. Speaking of the Magic Kingdom, conservative load Laura Loomer led a lightly attended ineffective protest at Disney's theme Park. A preacher wanker raged that trans people are “islamacizing” their genitals. Former Rep. Michele Bachmann blathered hypocritical mouth garbage about Ilhan Omar being a Muslim supremacist. Evil men's rights activist and professional racist Nick Fuentes said we are building a mercenary transgender and n-word army. A dude was busted smuggling reptiles over the border. A shark nearly bested a wee boat in an effort to eat a whole family to death.
Tucker Carlson loves his fascism served with a side of testicle tanning. Infowars Czar Alex Jones tried to hide his cash from the Sandy Hook families in shell corps owned by himself and his kids. Vlad sent a plane capable of dropping a nuke on a flyby of Ukraine. A Florida judge, who Trump appointed and was rated "unqualified by the ABA, lifted mask mandates on planes for the whole country. Representative Ilhan Omar shared an uncomfortable truth a Christian group's impromptu concert on a plane filled with unmasked passengers. A Christian prophet said prophets should ultimately be in charge. A dude got in the record books for watching the latest Spider-Man a crap ton. Parts of the Tucker nut-darkening flick was filmed on Alex Jones' property, with show even using one of Alex's big stupid guns.
Dianne Feinstein responded to accusations of her mental decline. Shanghai has been hit with COVID and extreme restrictions that have left some starving. Freak Frontline doc Stella Emmanuel came on Stew Peters' show to support the cobra venom COVID narrative from “Watch the Water.” Stella defended the loony theories in the snake/ Rona doc by citing the demon clones from the film "They Live". GOP wanker Ted Cruz was poo-poo'd by Senator Mike Lee over wild January 6th texts. Conservative loser fascist Madison Cawthorn hasn't raised much campaign money and the Dems are strategizing against him. A correctional officer is in big troubs legally for looking the other way when prison racial violence popped off. Shitler may bow out of a 2024 White House run due to health. A MAGAT rapper composed a tribute ballad for alleged sex trafficking rep Matt Gaetz of which Joel Greenberg's wife was featured. Twitter made itself undesirable for purchase by tech skeet lord Elon Musk. Jen Psaki tossed FOX News shade when asked about Doocy's intellect. Pundit Elie Mystal turned down former baller Herschel Walker's dumb invite to dinner extended to him via Hannity.
Elon Musk wants to buy Twitter so Nazis and racists can get their eMegaphones back. A MAGAT on trial for storming the Capitol and making off with a coat rack is claiming Trump made him do it. The Ukrainians sunk a major ship of the Russian navy with a missile. American must do much better by African Americans according to a study. The RNC withdrew from the commission for Presidential debates. Former baller and GOP Senatorial candidate Herschel Walker is leading in the polls along with Republican wanker Brian Kemp. Turning Point Czar Charlie Kirk said high rises creates liberals. A Republican from Tennessee said Hitler was homeless and the cruel dictator should be an inspiration to people living in poverty. Boebert E. Lee's reign could be short lived if she's loses to her primary challenger.
We live in a country where morons believe COVID is from cobra venom in the water. Frank James was arrested for the subway shooting in Brooklyn that involved smoke grenades. Life expectancy dropped by two years thanks to Trumpkins and the unvaccinated. Fascist load Marjorie Taylor Greene said joining the military is like throwing your life away. UK Czar BoJo was fined bigly for his COVID raves. White nationalist dingleberry Patrick Howley blathered something dumb about the Country Music Awards seeming like the fictional country from Black Panther, Wakanda. Conservative wanker Charlie Kirk blames inflation on transgender folk. A nutty Republican in Colorado threatened an assembly chairwoman. A dead snake owner died from the bite of one his horrible pets according to an autopsy.
Jared Kushner earned $2 billion protecting Saudi Prince MBS from backlash for murdering Khashoggi. Civilian deaths are rising in Mariupol. Oligarch Elon Musk won't be on the board of Twitter. Skesis GOP tart MTG tossed a reporter from an event. Racist load Tucker Carlson went ultra-racist with a guest on his FOX streaming show. There's a movement in the US to establish a four day work week. Dee Snider schooled a Republican a-hole on the meaning of his signature song “We're Not Gonna Take It.” We played a 2017 clip of the Rick and Morty creator losing it over how Americans handle fascism. Two thirds of adults would support their child coming out as LGBTQ. A fascist Republican mom wants to ban the book “It's Okay To Be a Unicorn.” Even the mildest cases of COVID may cause permanent brain damage.
The dumbest GOP villains love to take on professional comedians. For example, Jimmy Kimmel responded to weak shade from Gaetz by suggesting the pedo-repub should stay indoors since "it's Girl Scout cookie season." Cocaine enthusiast Don Jr. was texting Mark Meadows about ways his Daddy could overturn the election days before the January 6th insurrection. The Scottish government officially apologized to those prosecuted and tortured over accusations of witchcraft. Meanwhile, a white nationalist in America called for a restart of witch trials. A MAGAT pastor running for office pledged to bring back McCarthyism if elected. The wanker even promised to have the Clintons locked up. President Poopy Pants is being held in civil contempt. A racist GOP official in Virginia used a horrific slur to describe Biden's Pentagon Chief. There no convictions in the Witmer kidnapping trial. A RWNJ tool is established a grass roots white supremacy movement in Colorado school boards. Senator Schatz laid into insurrectionist Senator Howley calling him ridiculous. A bigly racist cop was allowed to resign after a slew of racist and anti-Semitic were discovered. Former Trump aide Richard Grenell was accused of an affiliation with a white supremacist organization in Twitter thread.
Even John Roberts is sick of the activist right-wing SCOTUS using the shadow docket. The Supremes actually did something to protect the citizenry from the thugs-in-blue. Putin, along with his personal “Rasputin” wants to take over Europe. Speaking of fascist Vlad, his daughters have been sanctioned because of Russia's war crimes upon Ukraine. A religious loon threw a fit over Caitlyn Jenner's hiring at Faux News. A preacher encouraged their flock to break car windows and commit violent acts against ANTIFA. Cretin MRA activist Nick Fuentes barely contained his stiffy over Stalin in an odd moment of Christianity. Democrat Jamie Raskin clapped back bigly at Marjorie Taylor Greene's heckle regarding Russia. Students in Wisconsin aren't reporting to class in furry attire and using in-classroom litter boxes despite the rambling of a dumbass Republican. Surely an angel earns its wings every time RWNJ wanker Stew Peters gets “swatted.” The nastier of the two Murdock demon spawn added to his personal navy.
SCOTUS nominee Ketanji Brown Jackson cleared the half-racist Senate committee. Republicans Romney and Murkowski voted to confirm the first African American female to the highest court. The world is outraged at Russia for their war crimes in Ukraine. Two key tech execs quit Trump's social media platform Truth Social. Republican fascist Roger Stones claims he's being censored on Truth Social. FOX News watchers were paid $15 an hour to watch CNN and became less gullible. No one wants to see Mike Lindell's face in his pillow ads. In Alabama, an insane bill was introduced stating a woman buying ganja must show a negative pregnancy test before picking up. A frisky flyer yanked it during a flight, was filmed by a fellow passenger but then then was arrested by FBI agents when the plane landed. Feral pigs are on the loose in Hollywood crapping toxic logs and rooting up celebs' lawns.
Hopefully NY Amazon workers voting to unionize brings about more organized labor. Amazon workers in Staten Island voted to unionize. A leaked Dickensian email thread between managers at an Applebees in Kansas caused a dramatic employee walkout Ukraine took out a fuel depot in Russia allegedly. A conservative kook warned everyone over the age of 30 who received the coronavirus vaccine will contract vaccine-induced AIDS. Religious wanker Stew Peters claimed Christian prayer was the only way to beat Rona since the vaccines were created by "the demonically-inspired spawns of Satan.” Trumpkin Roger Stoned said Representative Madison Cawthorn hasn't retracted his statement about cocaine GOP sex orgies. Marijuana legalization passed the House. The surviving members of Lynyrd Skynyrd crooned and penned a grotesquely composed anthem to Florida Governor DeathSantis. Trump told the group “Gays For Trump” they didn't look gay at all. Former running back star and Georgia Senatorial candidate Herschel Walker lied about graduating from college. Speaking of the Peach State, the loony rednecks decided let just about anyone carry and conceal a pea shooter insulin prices will be capped at $35/month.
The cops found a bunch fetuses stored in coolers in the basement of a forced birth activist. Corporate earnings hit an all-time high. SCOTUS Thomas has been pressured to recuse himself from rulings regarding the insurrection. Former hate-caster Laura Loomer said her white supremacist tendencies will help her get elected as the Rep for Florida's 11th. Facebook Czar Zuckerberg says he surfs to deal with stress regarding Facebook's bad press. The House is going to legalize weed. DINO Joe Manchin is super corrupt according to a Salon article. Caitlyn Jenner got a gig at FOX News. Comic Chris Rock said he was still processing the Will Smith slap. Adults stepped in and saved Florida from an evil anti-voting bill. Hunter Biden may be indicted. Late night host James Corden performed a song about how no one is allowed to talk about Jada Smith.
Trump wants his pal Putin to make up crap about Hunter Biden. CBS gave fascist Mick Mulvaney a gig. Bruce Willis retired from acting due to an aphasia diagnosis. GOP Senator Susan Collins said she'd vote yes to confirm Ketanji Jackson Browne. Shitler claimed he got a hole in one. Hate-caster Alex Jones will be fined for contempt for each day he fails to show up for court. Jada Smith called for healing after her husband slapped Chris Rock at the Oscars. Conservative and aspiring Nazi Madison Cawthorn caught hell from his Minority Leader after spilling the beans about the key bumps of blow and GOP orgies. Actor Ron Perlman was spot on for calling Governor DeSantis a Nazi pig. Rudy Giuliani's gross son said some creepy crap about his daughter. Marjorie Taylor Greene told Alex Jones she will be getting her team to work on a national version of the vile Florida “Don't Say Gay” bill.
Will Smith smacked Chris Rock then won an Oscar, and that's all the world could talk about. The LAPD could arrest Will Smith for slapping Chris Rock, he could lose his Oscar, and DJ Charlemagne said Will Smith needs therapy. Peace negotiators for Ukraine may have been poisoned while meeting with their Russian counterparts. Some nonwhite refugees are being held in internment camps after leaving Ukraine. The Czar of Florida signed the Don't-say-gay-bill. Shitler held a wee, sparsley-attended rally in Georgia. GOP Kraken Mo Brooks complained about Trump bullying him to overturn the 2020 election. The Crabs played a satirical ad explaining how Ted Cruz can get you book sales. Ivanka Trump vocal-fried her way through a video letting us all know she is helping give food to Ukrainian refugees.