I'm Telling Mom

Hey there Okee Dokie Babies, Sincerely, thank you so much for sticking with us this far. You've really made the journey super fun for us, and we've loved getting to know so many of you. Here's our unscripted, raw discussion that we wanted you to be apart of. We definitely aren't saying "goodbye"... are we? Support the show (https://www.paypal.com/paypalme/clasedegraff)

"Life is our greatest teacher." -Probably some smart person long ago In this episode, the three boys bounce down memory lane and share small nuggets of truth we've found along the way. Game titles include: Imponderables, Church or Weed Shop, and Don't F*&#%@ Lie To Me! Enjoy, friends! Support the show (https://www.paypal.com/paypalme/clasedegraff)

Welcome back you hob-knobblers and slick-sloopers. SMASH THAT LIKE BUTTON FOR A CHERRY CREAM PIE AND LETS JUST JUMP RIGHT INTO IT! In this episode, the boys scrounge around the darkest parts of the interwebs to uncover the worst creatures on the planet... influencers. Scoot your caboose down games like, "No Clue News", "Influencers Under the Influence", and "Influencer Marketing Fails"! Supermodels, MathsGoFlyByeBoi, and dumb brands... its all here. Big shouts to our SURPRISE GUEST INFLUENCER! Support the show (https://www.paypal.com/paypalme/clasedegraff)

Some criminals are smart. Some aren't. We typically find the latter MUCH more interesting! Join us this week as we slip into something a little more comfortable, pour a nice glass of raspberry soda pop, and look out the backyard window and think, "I could've gotten away with it, too, if it weren't for those meddling kids." Mason hosts this jamboree as we chat about: actual crimes the boys have committed, Florida Man, and Crime Time. Special thanks to this weeks sponsor: Bob. Support the show (https://www.paypal.com/paypalme/clasedegraff)

Our legal team here at ITM Studios told us that we have to clarify that murder, in fact, is not okay... (homicide sometimes is though).  Take a gander in this weeks' episode as the brothers talk through the logistics of 'Kill Or Be Killed' scenarios such as: the ethical Trolley Problem, Murderous Headlines, and the Tribal War of 2021 where Mason and Landen actually fight TO THE DEATH. Curious? Hit that play button... or else... we may have to take matters into our very capable, vigilante hands. Support the show (https://www.paypal.com/paypalme/clasedegraff)

You know what our highly-diverse and politically-correct society needs right now? The opinions of three privileged white men. So, here we are. Delivering the goods. In all honesty, this is a pretty stellar episode, where we talk about some serious topics that SHOULD be openly talked about - and we do it while still laughing and having fun. Strap in, young soldier. You're about to learn a thing or two. AND YOU WILL LIKE IT! Support the show (https://www.paypal.com/paypalme/clasedegraff)

Mason-Money spends like any other world currency, so it makes sense why Clase spends so long in this episode tearing down Landen's psyche to understand if he's lying about owning one or not. Know what else no family has ever fought over? Monopoly. Except in this edition, Mason takes out all the properties and replaces them with dead people. Clase and Landen are then left to maneuver around the board, guessing how these famous dead people died. Yep. Park Place is now Edgar Allen Poe, and Illinois Avenue is now Elvis Presley... *In distasteful sing-song voice* How did they die (bum bum bum) HOW DID THEY DIE?! That's what we're here to uncover for you. You're welcome. Special thank you to our sponsor: Maid: Shadow Legends, use the special, one-of-a-kind promo code to unlock: 46 mythical creatures, 894,000 Squiggle coins, 400 Floo points, and +23 speed boost to your blow pipe meter. Seriously. Support the show (https://www.paypal.com/paypalme/clasedegraff)

What if I told you that the boys had never seen the movie, Titanic until this week? What if I told you that we loved it so much we had to experience it first-hand? Hypothetically, what if Clase had Mason and Landen drop "los trousers" and dunk their skunks? Who would last longest? .... HYPOTHETICALLY, of course... What if... hypothetically... Clase put on his birthday suit and forced Mason and Landen to draw him like one of Jack's french girls...? And... hypothetically... the games could be called "Nautical Nonsense", "Frozen Nuts", and "Draw Me Like One of Your French Girls"... What a... haha... what an episode that'd make, huh? I'll just say this and then let you make an adult decision to partake or not... The video version on YouTube is everything you'd want it to be. Welcome to movie club. An episode inspired by a movie we've never seen. Titanic. Brrr. Support the show (https://www.paypal.com/paypalme/clasedegraff)

Carrot flutes? Carrot sculptures? Carrot go mouth? If Do-It-Yourself projects are your thing, click away now, because absolutely... we will leave you dissatisfied and spiraling down a disheveled avenue as you stroke your massive chin and ask... why? Ask no further. We don't know either. Welcome to DIWHY - asking the right questions, doing the wrong things. HUGE thank you to this weeks sponsor, JOSEPH ROBINETTE BIDEN JR. Yes, his real middle name is Robinette. Look it up. Support the show (https://www.paypal.com/paypalme/clasedegraff)

Okee dokee, babies... in this installment of "Niché Communities", Mason sits down with a self-proclaimed ex-Brony to understand the community and the psychology therein. What's your opinion on men who enjoy and identify with the 'My Little Pony' TV show? Wherever you land, we hope this open conversation gives you a new perspective and appreciation for a group of people that may not act and think like you. Check out our Youtube channel to WATCH the full interview, at I'm Telling Mom Podcast! Support the show (https://www.paypal.com/paypalme/clasedegraff)

EDIT: We do apologize in advance for this episode. Its R-rated, and we arent proud of everything said... but we love that you can see into some of the messiness that is our brotherhood. If you're easily offended or don't appreciate crude humor, skip this one. (thumbs up!) Ladies and gentlemanaas this iws anotherr peisode of getting ashmashed, obviverated, and flat out drnkkkkkkkkk. ur fault, **** u, enjoy.Sponsor: i lgeit don't know was ther 1??!Support the show (https://www.paypal.com/paypalme/clasedegraff)

Furries, we come in peace! No really, we just have some questions. Rather than try and speculate answers for those questions, Landen thought it'd be better to interview someone that calls themselves a furry. So sit back, relax, and enjoy this deep dive into a misunderstood niche community. Special thanks to: DVDs… on BluRay? We think? You tell us... Support the show (https://www.paypal.com/paypalme/clasedegraff)

Hey all you puddn' pops, what do you think R. Kelly and Bill Cosby have in common? They both suck! *age preference may vary though* Mason's segment is all about nice deeds done by potentially crappy celebrities. (No you idiot sandwich, we don't actually think Gordon Ramsey is bad.)Special thanks to our sponsor: THE GREATEST SPONSOR WE'VE EVER HAD ON THIS SHOW! Such a good sponsor in fact, that we delightfully invite you to just tune in to find out who it is.Support the show (https://www.paypal.com/paypalme/clasedegraff)

Ah, the joy of imaginative adventure, where one can truly separate themselves from the dreary real world and instead traverse new lands... oh wait. These guys don't know how to play D&D because they're playing regular interns in a corporate office. Follow the adventures of Erick Johnson (Mason) and Ryan Baker (Landen) as they explore the dark depths of a corporate office building. Will Ryan discover new love in an unlikely lady? Will Erick discover a secret eye into his personal space? Follow along and find out more in this episode of "WE DONT KNOW WHAT WE ARE DOING OR HOW TO PLAY D&D." Special thanks to our sponsor: Motorcycle Guy Riding the Horizon or Powerline! A true ode to our childhood road trip hero. Support the show (https://www.paypal.com/paypalme/clasedegraff)

Ladies and gentleman, children of all ages, welcome to the big tent! Marvel in wonder, gasp in awe, and giggle with glee at the wonders that await within this episode dedicated to circus acts. Will Clase pursue his dream of driving off a ramp at breakneck speed? Will Mason finally dedicate his life to swallowing boiling lead? All this and more await within the greatest *podcast* show on earth. Special thanks to our sponsor: bubbles. 2D circles turned 3D have never been cooler. Support the show (https://www.paypal.com/paypalme/clasedegraff)

Ouurrrrrr SPONSORRRR! Welcome to the episode all about the wild, wacky, and inflatable world of I'm Telling Mom Sponsors. If you've been around these parts for awhile, you may be aware we have a host of paying products, companies, and individuals lining up to drink from the goblet of podcast advertising. Buckle up for terribly-offensive "Badly-Placed Ads", super inappropriate "Slogan Versus Slogan", and other shameful shenanigans. Check out www.itmmerch.com! Support the show (https://www.paypal.com/paypalme/clasedegraff)

Hear ye! Hear ye! Young and old! Lend me your ears! No, seriously, we need 340 ears to break the world record... BE IT WEIRD, DIRTY, DUMB, or all three... I'm Telling Mom has collected some of the greatest World Records ever recorded. We scoured the worlds greatest sites - Guinness, Ripleys, RecordSetter, and others - and, honestly, hated what we found... so... ENJOY! Beyond seeking out Darwin Awards, we even attempt a few World Records ourselves... can we do it? Are we celebrities now? Will amazon ship us gold medals, accordingly? Not to give out any spoilers or anything... but the ultimate winner was able to pick his ceremony anthem, and one of us loved it and one of us couldn't stand it. Support the show (https://www.paypal.com/paypalme/clasedegraff)

Hark dear sweet listeners, do you hear that? It's the sound of throbbing heartstrings, gushing at the voices of three brothers offering golden boyfriend ideas. Or rather… two brothers offering one or two actual golden ideas in between a dumpster fire of terrible ideas to the one brother who's still single. Brave listener, do enjoy today's episode to hear all about personalized condoms, Family Guy pole dancing, stealing art, and so much more. Special thanks to today's sponsor: the-thing-in-Mason's-hand… whatever it is. Support the show (https://www.paypal.com/paypalme/clasedegraff)

Happy 2 Year Anniversary! Yep, that's right, the brothers have been pumping out weekly podcast episodes for 2 years straight. That's gotta be a record….right? So why not celebrate with an entire episode dedicated to pie, pi, and sexual innuendos. Mason hosts this oddly specific listening experience with segments about stealing pie, counting pi, and guessing pie charts. Listen in! Special thanks to today's sponsor: Lil Infant, the hottest rapper to hit the scene in decades. Support the show (https://www.paypal.com/paypalme/clasedegraff)

Get your safe words ready listeners, this episode is gonna get weird. Three mini-segments come from the mind of Clase, as he challenges Mason and Landen with death trivia (Who Died By What Now?), a twisted game of rock, paper, scissors, and sound effects (That Sounds Good To Me)… all relating to the theme: Earth, Water, Fire, and Hookers. Yes, it's really that simple. Special thank you to this week's sponsor: stars.chromeexperiments.com, the perfect galactic adventure, even if you're sober! Support the show (https://www.paypal.com/paypalme/clasedegraff)

Do aliens exist under our deep oceans? Did Netflix cause mass havoc on purpose? And perhaps the biggest question of them all: is Mason's micropeen really the best? Join the DeGraff brothers as they take a deep dive (but not too deep, aliens, remember?) into multiple conspiracy theories existing in today's world. Don't miss the Conspiracy Theory Tier List at the end: critical conversations surrounding fake birds and immortal queens await. Special thank you to today's sponsor: the color orange. Or green? We're not really sure. Support the show (https://www.paypal.com/paypalme/clasedegraff)

Prepare yourself for tomato throwing as the boys become movie critics in this episode featuring well-known movies that you didn't know had sequels. I mean really, Home Alone 5?! Enjoy your trip down memory lane as classics such as Winnie the Pooh, Toy Story, and more are discussed at length by under-qualified reviewers. Special thank you to today's sponsor: littlealchemy2.com, where you can learn things and do science stuff and maybe have fun I guess? Support the show (https://www.paypal.com/paypalme/clasedegraff)

Four score and a just few days ago, the DeGraff brothers embarked on a journey to discover historical idiots of history… of the historic kind. Before this though, you will be challenged to think: have I ever killed anyone? Should wholesome porn be more popular? Is Blanket Jackson reaallllyy named Blanket Jackson? Then, travel with us dear listener, along the path of a historical idiot named Timothy Dexter. Sometimes it truly pays to be an idiot. Thank you to our sponsor: E-Girl Voicemail Services, keeping you company in the most contactless way possible since 2005. Support the show (https://www.paypal.com/paypalme/clasedegraff)

3…2…1… WE HAVE LIFTOFF. Welcome aboard today's flight where we'll traverse the origins of ITM Podcast by listening to the never-before heard pilot episode, recorded over two years ago. The birth of our “editor” Stephen, thoughts on what to call the podcast, and cutting edge commentary await exploration in this blast from the past. Oh, and if you look to your left, you'll experience an old segment called FACEBOOK REWIND. Special thank you to our sponsor: purplecloudstudio.com, for all your human ash décor needs.Support the show (https://www.paypal.com/paypalme/clasedegraff)

Hey guys and gals! Have you ever wondered just how many blimps there are in the world? We haven't either, until now. Join the boys on a musical journey as they dive into Mason's Disney-themed trivia questions, then try to guess whether a song was created by a real artist or from the bomb-shell-littered mind of Mason himself. Thank you to our sponsor: secret door, a website that takes you somewhere interesting around the world. No, your Aunt Becky's crackhouse in Atlanta doesn't count... ...or does it? Support the show (https://www.paypal.com/paypalme/clasedegraff)

Abracadabra! It's time to channel your inner magic as the boys travel down Wizard “Poop” Lane, first discussing the fact that J.K. Rowling basically wrote in Harry Potter: “Wizards magic their poop away.” That's real, look it up. Next, dust off your wand as Clase challenges the boys with magical movie trivia! Special thanks to today's sponsor: Jeremy! He likes things. Support the show (https://www.paypal.com/paypalme/clasedegraff)

Alright class, pop-quiz time! Did Clase used to be pretentious? Would space travel be boring? Does the Internet even work in space? If you answered “Yeah, I think. Not really sure about the Clase one though, I mean, he…” to all three of those, you got an A+, great job! After these IQ testers, join the brothers as they decide to get confrontational and lay out their grievances with one another for the sheer sake of drama. (Because Trisha Paytas has nothing on us!) Then, embrace the greatest hero of our time: One Left-Eyebrowed Slippy Spaghett Man.Special thank you to our episode's sponsor: Q-Tips. Not C-Tips. Q. You'll understand. Support the show (https://www.paypal.com/paypalme/clasedegraff)

How would you spell Dalmatians? Cuz I spelled it Dalmations and got yelled at by a red squiggly line. Sorry, red line gods. Disclaimer: Dalmatians nor the counting of have absolutely anything to do with this episode. I (Stephen) took a pay cut and this half-assed title/description is now my rebellion fight song response. ...but.... 101 Dalmations, amirite?---------Post-Release Edit: Description: Ep. 101 Odd Deaths Gather ‘round children and cuddle your teddy bears close, because it's storytime! This week's storytime is devoted to all things “Odd Deaths,” so naturally Mason will be giving you insight on every radically inane way to kill people in Mortal Kombat! Before that though, enjoy the “improv” show as the boys challenge each other to simply be funnier. Special thanks to today's sponsor: CATMACA, because f*ck trees. Support the show (https://www.paypal.com/paypalme/clasedegraff)

We may have never released our pilot episode, but we sure as darn tootin' just released our 100th episode! Get out those maracas, grab your girl, and celebrate with the boys as we take a listen back to some of our favorite moments in I'm Telling Mom history. BUT WAIT! THERE'S MORE! Announcements have been made! New Merch Store, new YouTube Channel (for all your visual highlights), and a new streaming schedule -- all to give you more to indulge in! Check out all the latest goods at www.itmmerch.com and hang out with us on Sunday evenings on Twitch! Support the show (https://www.paypal.com/paypalme/clasedegraff)

Welcome to the end of an era, boy and girls. This is it! You did it. Give yourself a pat on the back and go enjoy a nice bubblin' hot cocoa, you fella, you. Well done. Ninety nine episodes and... heh... look at us.... who wouldda thought? Huh? Not me..... not me. This episode BOPS with epic intro poems, 2x2 rubix cubes, and high-energy e-girl twerking tiktoks that make us go "aww, that's a no-no". This audio-experience TWISTS with Masons classic segment, "What Did They SAY?!" where he imparts love notes in Clase and Landens ears in the form of guttural screaming. This installment PULLS on your heart strings as we introduce our sponsor - one of love, compassion, and understanding - Bristlr.com, the ONLY online dating website that matches people with beards with people that want to stroke beards. This track SPINS faster than any DJ I've ever seen, especially when Landen breaks out his segment, "Bizarre Facebook Groups" - where Clase and Mason have to figure out what borderline-socially-unacceptable facebook groups we are in, theoretically, of course. And big news coming next episode... so make sure to FLICK all the like buttons, subscribe on coughYOUTUBEcough and coughTIKTOKcough. And also discord and twitch. And Facebook.  Idk... but we may have a merch store now.... more in episode 100! Support the show (https://www.paypal.com/paypalme/clasedegraff)

It’s decided: the DeGraff brothers are beginning the almighty protest against all dentists and doctors alike… or at least complaining about them in this episode. Follow along to hear Clase and Landen angrily rant about the Kyles of this world wearing flat-billed hats and how wooden pencil erasers never work. Then, Mason and Landen battle it out in the game: “Hey brother, wanna say a slang?” where retro phrases like “can of whoop ass” and “cool beans” finally make their way back into the 2021 era. Special thank you to today’s sponsor: circumcision. (No promo code boys, sorry). 

Ladies and gents, it’s time to get in on the next big thing created by the boys: app-controlled, LED-lit, see-through dishwashing machines. This is when your chores become a party, baby. After this revolution revelation, Clase kicks off his segment, “What the errihh did he just say?”  Basically, what the f*&% did Short Neck Ed from 90 Day Fiance just say? Next, Landen soothes your soul with a bit of self-written poetry called “Cow in the Bathtub.”  No explanation needed there. Special thanks to today’s sponsor: twitch.tv/stopsigncam, because being Big Brother is more fun with class participation. 

Hey kiddo, welcome back! In today’s episode, the boys peruse a number of topics like: is frog fighting the next big business idea, should airport cell phone lots have detailing services, and do spiders compare one another’s web girth? Following these lovely convos, Landen gets serious with his segment, “Famous Scandinavian Author or Ikea Product”. Special thank you to our sponsor: my90stv.com, where you can relive your wildest childhood nostalgia on a square VHS TV all over again. 

Welcome back, Bended Traveler.Landen pulls back the curtains of Episode 95 by introducing his 12-year-old-self's made up super hero, Voltaic. If you got a tad excited over the mention of super heroes, I'd be giving good advice to just say... calm down. It's a 12-year-old-Landen creation. Speaking of being calm, Clase gets upset about the 'Scooby Doo' TV show not being called 'Velma', and Landen reminisces about the good ole days... before he crashed a company drone in a fountain in the Bahamas. Still not enough calm for you? Mason masterfully draws an arrow from his quiver and gracefully steadies his aim directly at red car owners. Mason Money! The new, official currency of ITM Podcast - where one Mason Money = one Mason forced action (you'll have to listen to understand).Not to be outdone by a 12-foot inflatable beach ball steamrolling through our podcast, DJ Khaled's Keys to Success, and DJ Khaled's Second Key Ring with More Keys. Tease Episode 100. 

Hey neighbor, thanks for listening! We start today’s episode talking about Satanists, isn’t that fun? Continuing cruising with us on this hellish ride to learn what surprising first products Nintendo, Lego, and other popular companies’ originally sold at inception. From there, enjoy getting thrown into even more disturbing conversations from Landen’s segment called Moral Dilemma. Special thanks to the sponsor of today’s episode: amirite.com, where Mason first fell in love by asking thought-provoking questions like, “You still have no idea what ‘P.U.’ stands for, amirite?” 

Okee dokee babies, let me break it down for you. There is a long (but seriously enthralling) story about Clase pulling over a cop - you read that right. Landen plays a snarly-gnarly game called, "#IsItATrend?" but we liked his second title better, "How Great Is Tik Tok, emmaright?" (This is the part about dipping boys in soy). And I oop! (Did I use that right?) Don't forget to test your internet speeds with speedtest.net! Finally, Mason swoops in with a banger of a segment he so eloquently titled, "Backstories: The Story of Back Before the Story That You Heard Before It, and This Is the Back to It." In other words, Clase and Landen make up Disney villain backstories... and they are worth the listen, trust us. Thanks for listening, fam! Hang in there - Episode 100 is coming! [insert celebrating emoji with confetti and that blowy noise maker thingy in its mouth] 

Welcome to episode 92 of the ITM Podcast, we’re real proud to have you along for this journey. Landen joins Clase at his house but is shoved into a closet, Mason creates an impossibly difficult “Spell Quiz” the likes of which would have even the most die-hard Potter fan quaking, and Clase re-invigorates “The Great Debate” with a twist of his own: forcing arguments based on topics the others hate the most. Something about stars aligning to form deathmetal music aka the worst music ever created… or something like that. Special thank you to our sponsor: batheinmymilk.com, and yes... it’s as terrifying as it sounds. 

(while acting out Monty Python) Hey there Kitten,Thanks for always coming back to listen to our soothing voices. Clase kicks up a new ongoing short-segment called "Hypothetical Garden" to ask: How many wifi extenders would the White House have? This, then, flows right into his first segment: "Animal Invasion" where Mason and Landen try to figure out how many zebras would it take to kill off everybody in Las Vegas. From there, prepare yourself, dear listener, because things get intense. Landen challenges Clase and Mason to eat the world's hottest gummy bear, Lil Nitro (9 MILLION Scoville units... 900 times hotter than a Jalapeño pepper), while re-enacting the iconic Witch Scene from Monty Python and the Holy Grail. Special 'Thank You!' to our sponsors: Mason's non-existent t-shirt side hustles, www.speggitee.com and www.pookemans.com. 

Hey fellow kids, do you know what an NFT is? We sure don't. Actually, we don't understand much of anything after Mason's segment: I CANT UNDERSTAND YOU! Who knew the phrase "I have crippling hemorrhoids" could cause so much chaos? Next, hop into Landens time machine as he takes us all back to the basements of the 1990s, when PC gaming hit its true peak. Special 'Thank You!' to our sponsor of today's episode: www.papertoilet.com, for all your swiping butt-wiping needs. 

Hey there, fellow cereal box gamers... join us for a fun episode discussing how dumb checks are, ponder which type of Skyrim players we are, and more. In segment one, Clase presents popular products of today that were originally created for a different purpose. DYK, back in the day, members of the calvary were lookin’ pretty spicy in their high heels. Next, immerse yourself in true animated beauty as we work to rank attractiveness of female animated movie characters. Special thanks to our sponsor: pictureofhotdog.com, for all your glizzy needs.

Does peanut butter and grilled cheese go together? The boys were prepared to find out in this episode. Follow along on the adventure as Clase kicks off his segment with a trivia game that has spicy consequences. Landen then swings the podcast back into “Finish The Headline” mode, bringing some of the latest weird news into question. Special shoutout to the sponsor: Game Grumps! Yeah... those guys... on the YouTubes!

Many questions are asked in this episode, beginning with “Who’s spent the most on Amazon in 2020?” Hint: not Mason or Landen. Then, Landen asks Clase and Mason, “What are my top 5 favorite animated movies?” Hint: not Wreck It Ralph, Monster’s Inc, Toy Story, Incredibles, or Lilo & Stitch. Finally, Mason asks Clase and Landen: “Who here has streaked? Who here has had an STD? Who here has had their buttcheeks fondled?” Get the answers to these and many more pressing questions in this special episode.Special thanks to our sponsor: rainymood.com. Soft and subtle rain sound effects to fondle your buttcheeks to sleep.

In this episode, the boys get into heated discussions about certain brands they like but mostly about certain brands they hate. Please read the following for the SparkNotes version of this conversation: Clase - “F*!% Honey, this is my anti-Honey ad.” Mason - “I kinda want Raycon earbuds!” Clase - “F*!% Raycon earbuds.” Mason - “Skullcandy is coming out with new earbuds too!” Clase - “F*!% Skullcandy earbuds.” Mason - “F*!% Raid Shadow Legends.” Landen - “F*!% MeUndies.” Mason - “I like Gillette for my balls!” Landen - “F*!% Dude Wipes.” Clase - “F*!% you Landen.” After enjoying this fine example of scholarly oratory, stick around as Mason brings back a segment from Episode 76: D&D at the office. Join fedora-wearing Erick and fidget-spinning Ryan as they meet Grilda, the resident office basement dweller. Next, Clase brings a new game to the podcast called “How Dumb Is Alexa,” a fun new word game that drives Mason and Landen up a wall. Special thanks to our sponsor: O’Reilly Auto Parts. Use promo code “GreatScott!” to get 20% of a new Flux Capacitor.

Folks, the time has come for the boys to answer your most pressing life question: is it possible to have too much cream cheese on a bagel? Stick around until the end to find out. Before you get there though, join the brothers as they take a journey of self-discovery to learn who can type the fastest while being insulted and yelled at. Then, a special guest subs in for Landen to teach everyone about “The Nine Pillars of Islam” aka “The Price Is Right: 90’s Edition” … Just listen, you’ll understand. Special thanks to our sponsor, the PlayStation 5: so good you can’t get it.

Ope, careful there dear listener, this episode unleashes the boys’ rage, beginning with Landen’s recent road incident. Tread lightly as you then get transported into the classic segment, “The Great Debate,” whereupon Clase and Mason have an epic battle of words that culminate in solidifying Landen’s future as an idiotic monkey forever screeching “GME TO THE MOON!” If you’re able to pass through this unscathed, your journey then continues into Mason’s segment “Thinking Of Things Is Hard And Some Letters Are Bad.” Warning: this poorly titled game causes crippling fury, especially if you believe a microscope is a “means to see inside someone’s body” or that a gorilla “can swim naturally.” And perhaps you, the one dear sweet listener that actually takes the time to read these episode descriptions (lol why), may wonder “why should the madness stop there?!” Touché my friend, because it doesn’t! The boys are then joined by Mama DeGraff, who reads the final results of the Console Challenge. Hint: it was closer than your own mama’s pew-packed buttcheeks on a Sunday morning. A big thank you to our sponsor: IsItChristmas.com. Type. Click. “No.” It’s that easy.

Yes, you read that right. A big thank you to our sponsor of this episode: sugar free gummy bears. Eat enough of them, and you too can enjoy the powerful ride to porcelain nirvana. Clase and Mason sure did. Join the butt-clenching adventure as the boys struggle through the time transcending question: what is the worst way to die? Yep, you guessed it, Mason creates a tier list of the worst ways to die. So Trigger Warning: if you or a loved one has been diagnosed with uh, gee, I don’t know, getting eaten by a shark, maybe don’t listen to this one. But if you stick with us, by all means, please enjoy the soft melodic sounds of grown men discussing how to best hold their pressuring fecal matter in until the point of no return...

Listen, we’re not proud of how this episode begins, but we’re damn proud of how it ends. Join Mason and Landen as they take advantage of Clase’s absence by taking a fond trip down memory lane, reviewing some of Clase’s oldest videos and social media posts. From 2010-2013, Clase managed to make the worst-edited-mirror-selfie-music-video, sensually wear jackets with nothing underneath while unnecessarily moaning “yeah” to no one, whisper “I love you” five hundred times without the viewer’s consent, and more. Ope, and this just in from Mom DeGraff: he gets butt naked to go potty. Hooray! Special thanks to our sponsor: lady bugs on Amazon. Put on your lady bug costume, play your lady bug music, and throw a lady bug party. Why the (dial-up noise) not.

Following one of the weirdest days in US history (quaint raid of the Capitol anyone?), the DeGraff brothers get even weirder by discussing what food mascots they could beat up. I mean really, who wouldn’t want to hear Mason say verbatim: “I would punt the Gerber Baby across a football field.” After that, Landen treats you once again to the most thought provoking thoughts that are clearly not his own, but that of r/showerthoughts on Reddit. And of course, we’d be remiss not to thank our dearly beloved sponsor of the episode: The Cheese Lady, defying all odds and defeating evil with each cheese sculpture she crafts. Enter promo code: lolwhatthef*ckamidoingwithmylifetobebuyingacheesesculpturerightnow for 110% off.

The game list speaks for itself: Funky Band Name Origins, La La Land or Nicki Minaj?, and the January Mile-High Challenge! Well... that, and the new slogan of the ooey-gooey rice-cream-makers: "Turn off your lights. Shut off your heat. Rice Krispies."

You know when you rip apart a dumb idea, but then go ahead with it anyways? NEW YEARS RESOLUTIONS SUCK AND ARE POINTLESS - QUIT WHILE YOU'RE AHEAD! This week the boys take on a Month-Long Fitness Challenge for a their choice of a new PlayStation 5 or XBOX X. They also, apparently, felt compelled to share their baseless and uninformed opinions about discipline, goals, accountability -- ALL THE MOTIVATION YOU NEED FOR 2021! They also play a few new games such as: "Dot-Dot-Dot" - Mason's game of complete stupidity; and "Diggin' The Decades", where Clase makes the other two rank the decades of the 20th and 21st centuries from best to live in to worst. And thanks to this weeks sponsor: The COVID-19 Vaccine

HAPPY NEW YEAR! While this is not apart of our scheduled uploads, we wanted to share a bit of the ridiculousness that YOU never hear! We're calling this 'The Blooper Episode', welcome to more mediocrity and amateur-ness from I'm Telling Mom!