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Reconnection Club Members can use the player on our Podcast Player page to play episodes continuously. Follow us on Instagram. * * * Many estranged adult children report feeling invalidated in their interactions with their parents. These feelings -- of being dismissed, misunderstood, or emotionally unseen -- often contribute to ongoing disconnection. But what exactly does invalidation sound like in everyday conversation? And how can parents begin to recognize these pitfalls, to make sure they're being as supportive as they want to be? In this compassionate and informative episode, host Tina Gilbertson begins a vital exploration of validation -- what it means, why it matters, and how it often plays a pivotal role in the dynamics between parents and adult children. The first of a four-part series, this episode focuses on three common types of invalidating responses. Tina breaks down each type with clarity and care, offering real-life examples to help listeners recognize them in context. Future episodes in this series will explore validation in greater depth, offering tools and insights to support parents on their journey through estrangement with empathy and clarity. For much more on relationships between parents and adult children, including what goes wrong and how parents can respond effectively, read Tina's book, Reconnecting With Your Estranged Adult Child. Reconnection Club members can discuss this and every episode in the General Discussion forum inside the Reconnection Club. Not a member yet? Learn more and join. EPISODE LINKS: How to Validate Someone Validation and Estrangement Words of Validation for Parents of No-Contact Adult Children Validation Workshop (Reconnection Club member login required)
This important episode features excerpts from a previously recorded conversation between host Tina Gilbertson and trauma expert Harold “Pat” Patrick, regarding trauma from adverse childhood experiences (ACEs). Their discussion uncovers how unresolved trauma from even the distant past can subtly shape the emotional lives of parents today -- especially those facing rejection from their adult children. Even after years of therapy, deep-seated emotional wounds can persist, influencing parents' reactions. In two separate excerpts, Pat offers valuable insights on how to recognize the hidden remnants of trauma, and explores the powerful idea that it's never too late to begin healing, and to find happiness within. Whether you're a parent struggling with wrenching emotional pain from estrangement, or simply seeking to understand the current situation better, this episode provides hope and practical advice for moving forward and reclaiming your emotional well-being. For more on how to repair your relationship with your estranged adult child(ren), read Tina's book, Reconnecting With Your Estranged Adult Child. Club members can discuss this and every episode in the General Discussion forum inside the Reconnection Club. Not a member yet? Learn more and join. EPISODE RESOURCES: Reconnection Club Podcast Ep. 194: Room for Improvement The Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACEs) Questionnaire The full interview with Pat Patrick (RC members must be logged in to access)
When adult children become estranged from their parents, the ripple effects can often spread to other family members—siblings, grandparents, and even close friends. These "innocent bystanders" can become collateral damage in the fallout of a family rift. In this clarifying episode, host Tina Gilbertson explores four common reasons why estranged adult children might distance themselves from others in the family, and even beyond. Understanding these motivations can offer a clearer picture of the situation and may help ease parents' fears about the extent of the rift. You'll learn that collateral damage doesn't always mean your adult child's estrangement is extreme or escalating; it may simply be a reflection of complex dynamics at play. If you're a parent struggling to understand why your child's estrangement from you is affecting their other relationships, this episode offers insight into the reasons behind it. You'll gain a clearer understanding of the emotional complexities underlying estrangement, and why “innocent bystanders” sometimes become part of the (hopefully temporary) fallout. For information and tips on how to make repairs and begin to heal from parent-adult child estrangement, read Tina Gilbertson's book, Reconnecting With Your Estranged Adult Child. Reconnection Club members can discuss this and every episode in the General Discussion forum inside the Reconnection Club. Not a member yet? Learn more and join. Or get on the Reconnection Club mailing list. EPISODE RESOURCES: Reconnection Club Podcast Ep. 31: Why Don't Other Relatives Help?
Parents have various ways to cope with the pain of prolonged estrangement from their adult children. One of them is to find a way to let their children go, with love, in their hearts. Letting an adult child go can bring a measure of relief to those who are able to do it. They may feel more peaceful and less sad. It's relatively easy to let go of someone in silence. But what happens if they suddenly contact you? Reconnection Club Podcast host Tina Gilbertson speaks to parents having just that experience. They're caught in a dilemma between silence and peace on the one hand, and undependable contact on the other. In this illuminating episode, Tina suggests leaning in to this dilemma as a first step to finding your way past it. For more on relationships between parents and adult children, including what goes wrong and how parents can respond effectively, read Tina's book, Reconnecting With Your Estranged Adult Child. Reconnection Club members can discuss this and every episode in the General Discussion forum inside the Reconnection Club. Not a member yet? Learn more and join. EPISODE LINKS: RC Podcast Episode 144: What's Your Strategy? “If Your Child Contacts You After Asking for No Contact” (log in for access)
The journey through unwanted estrangement from adult children can remain challenging even after extensive personal work and therapy, as hidden barriers continue to surface. In this pivotal episode, Reconnection Club Podcast host Tina Gilbertson explores how parents who have built fulfilling lives and invested in their own growth may still have blind spots that hinder their healing journey. Key Insights: Even with extensive therapy and personal development, we may have unrecognized areas that need attention The assumption that we've "done enough work" can itself become a barrier to deeper healing Parents who have created successful lives despite estrangement may overlook remaining opportunities for emotional growth Looking inward, rather than focusing on reconciliation or the adult child's actions, can reveal unexpected areas for personal development Tina offers a gentle challenge to parents to consider that there may be more internal work to discover, even when it seems like all possible growth has been achieved. For more on how to repair your relationship with your estranged adult child(ren), read Tina's book, Reconnecting With Your Estranged Adult Child. Get on Tina's mailing list. Club members can discuss this and every episode in the General Discussion forum inside the Reconnection Club. Not a member yet? Learn more and join.
When adult children cut contact with their parents, they often cite experiences and memories that their parents remember completely differently. But what happens when two people recall the same events in contradicting ways? In this illuminating episode, Reconnection Club host Tina Gilbertson tackles the complex nature of truth in family relationships. Through an engaging example of a backyard barbecue, she demonstrates how seemingly opposing versions of events can both hold validity – and why trying to prove your adult child "wrong" about their memories may be counterproductive. Tina explains that emotional truth in relationships operates differently from objective facts, offering insights for parents struggling to reconcile their memories with their adult child's perspective. This episode provides essential understanding for parents who want to build bridges rather than debate whose version of events is "correct." Members can discuss this episode in the General Discussion forum inside the Reconnection Club. Not a member yet? Learn more and join. Check out Tina's book, Reconnecting with Your Estranged Adult Child EPISODE LINKS: Reconnection Club Podcast Ep. 117: Heroes and Villains
When your adult child goes “no contact,” it can feel like you're suddenly in a state of emergency. How did this happen? What is a parent supposed to do? How do you fix this painful problem if your child won't talk to you? When dealing with a crisis, the last thing you might be concerned about is balance. But balancing activity with sufficient rest is critical for anyone trying to solve an important problem. We're simply not at our best when we're out of balance. We don't have our full capabilities, and we suffer from exhaustion and despair. Whether you feel like you've gone into overdrive, or the opposite – that you've been mired in passivity or paralysis – host Tina Gilbertson has something for you in this simple but profound episode. For information and tips on how to make repairs and begin to heal from parent-adult child estrangement, read Tina's book, Reconnecting With Your Estranged Adult Child. Reconnection Club members can discuss this and every episode in the General Discussion forum inside the Reconnection Club. Not a member yet? Learn more and join. Or get on the RC mailing list. EPISODE LINKS: Start the New Year With … Rest? How to Do the Bare Minimum Constructive Wallowing: How to Beat Bad Feelings By Letting Yourself Have Them
Having a no-contact adult child can be not only painful, but genuinely confusing. They might agree to receive texts from you, but not reply to any texts you send. Maybe they tell you they love you, even as they continue to create distance. When you stop contacting them at their request, why do they then claim you don't care about them? What's going on? What do they want? How can you figure that out if they won't talk to you? In this reassuring episode, Tina Gilbertson suggests that maybe you don't have to. Generally speaking, mixed messages are not a sign that your adult child is mentally ill or worse, messing with you. Instead, they can be an unconscious expression of ambivalence or a reflection of normal developmental changes in young or recently launched adults. For much more on relationships between parents and adult children, including what goes wrong and how to respond effectively, read Tina's book, Reconnecting With Your Estranged Adult Child. Reconnection Club members can discuss this and every episode in the General Discussion forum inside the Reconnection Club. Not a member yet? Learn more and join. EPISODE LINKS: Reconnection Club Podcast Ep. 171: Understanding Ambivalence
When your adult child goes no contact, you search for solutions. You hunt for ideas, inspiration, support and above all, answers. And the whole time, you feel awful. Estrangement, in other words, is hard. It's natural to gravitate towards quick and relatively easy solutions: Writing an apology letter. Sending gifts. Showing up unannounced. Sending one text after another, despite receiving no reply. For parents, the real work of healing estrangement often has nothing to do with contact. It's long, slow, difficult and solitary work. But parents who take the harder path can earn greater rewards, sooner, as host Tina Gilbertson explains in this essential episode. For more on how to repair your relationship with your estranged adult child(ren), read Tina's book, Reconnecting With Your Estranged Adult Child. Club members can discuss this and every episode in the General Discussion forum inside the Reconnection Club. Not a member yet? Learn more and join.
This is Part 2 of a 2-part episode that began with Episode 188 (not 187 as stated in this episode). Click here for Part 1. More often than not, when no-contact adult children end their estrangements and return to the relationship, there's an elephant in the room -- at least from the parent's point of view. Parents feel like they're walking on eggshells, trying to avoid whatever it was that created the problem in the first place. If only their adult children would tell them what went wrong, so they could keep it from happening again! But that elephant-in-the-room feeling may not be shared by the adult child, who wants the relationship to work as much as the parent does. They might not want to talk about the elephant. And that leaves parents feeling unsettled, to say the least. This episode is for you if you're feeling nervous and unsure around your recently reconciled, or semi-estranged, adult child. For more about how to make repairs and begin to heal from parent-adult child estrangement, read show host Tina Gilbertson's book, Reconnecting With Your Estranged Adult Child. Reconnection Club members can discuss this and every episode in the General Discussion forum inside the Reconnection Club. Not a member yet? Learn more and join. EPISODE RESOURCES: Seeking Safety in Estrangement (scroll to bottom of that page for more emotional safety resources) The Center for Nonviolent Communication Validation and Estrangement How to Validate Someone
More often than not, when no-contact adult children end their estrangements and return to the relationship, there's an elephant in the room -- at least from the parent's point of view. Parents feel like they're walking on eggshells, trying to avoid whatever it was that created the problem in the first place. If only their adult children would tell them what went wrong, so they could keep it from happening again! But that elephant-in-the-room feeling may not be shared by the adult child, who wants the relationship to work as much as the parent does. They might not want to talk about the elephant. And that leaves parents feeling unsettled, to say the least. This episode is for you if you're feeling nervous and unsure around your recently reconciled, or semi-estranged, adult child. For more about how to make repairs and begin to heal from parent-adult child estrangement, read show host Tina Gilbertson's book, Reconnecting With Your Estranged Adult Child. Reconnection Club members can discuss this and every episode in the General Discussion forum inside the Reconnection Club. Not a member yet? Learn more and join. EPISODE RESOURCES: Reconnection Club Podcast Ep. 125: The GOOD Parent's Biggest Blind Spot, Part 1 Reconnection Club Podcast Ep. 126: The GOOD Parent's Biggest Blind Spot, Part 2 Reconnection Club Podcast Ep. 54: Why Do They Cut Off Contact Instead of Talking About It? Reconnection Club Podcast Ep. 118: Does Your Adult Child Lack Communication Skills?
Hear the voices of parent who are facing the holidays without their estranged adult children this year... If you're unwillingly estranged from your adult child or children during the holiday season, host Tina Gilbertson and members of the Reconnection Club community want you to know you're not alone. Listen to this very special episode in your podcast player app before it expires on December 30th, 2024. Episodes never expire from the Reconnection Club website. Find any episode on our site by typing the episode number after a “/” like this: “Reconnectionclub.com/187” For more holiday-related resources from the Reconnection Club, check out these materials: RCP Episode 107: Staying Present In Their Absence Practice Slow Breathing BEFORE the Holidays Inviting Estranged Adult Children Home For the Holidays RCP Episode 69: It's OK to Enjoy Yourself During Estrangement Make a Detailed Plan to Get Through Special Days Getting Through Christmas For much more about how to deal with estrangement from your adult child(ren) throughout the year, read Tina's book, Reconnecting With Your Estranged Adult Child. Reconnection Club members can discuss this and every episode in the General Discussion forum inside the Reconnection Club. Not a member yet? Learn more and join.
Following on from episodes 160 and 162 (see episode links below), host Tina Gilbertson addresses another one of those cognitive distortions (or common thinking errors) that create extra suffering in an experience that's already painful: Estrangement from your adult child(ren). In this episode, Tina runs through a total of six examples (keep listening after she reviews the first three!) of black and white thinking embraced by parents of no-contact adult children. How many feel familiar to you? Listeners will find relief in the idea that estrangement isn't necessarily all or nothing, that there are many possibilities -- even when that doesn't seem possible. For more information on why adult children become estranged (or "go no-contact") and what parents can do about it, read Tina's book, Reconnecting With Your Estranged Adult Child. Reconnection Club members can discuss this and every episode in the General Discussion forum inside the Reconnection Club. Not a member yet? Learn more and join. EPISODE LINKS: Reconnection Club Podcast Ep. 160: Emotional Reasoning Reconnection Club Podcast Ep. 162: Overgeneralizing and Catastrophizing Reconnection Club Podcast Ep. 117: Heroes and Villains Reconnection Club Podcast Ep. 176: Regarding Apologies Reconnection Club Podcast Ep. 154: Nothing Happens in a Vacuum
Tina Gilbertson's Constructive Wallowing
Some estranged adult children go no contact because they say their parents are too critical. Has your adult child made this complaint? Are you frustrated because you just don't see what they're seeing? Does it seem like your adult child is too sensitive, and you're walking on eggshells because you never know what's going to make them feel criticized? Or do you recognize what they're talking about, but can't seem to change the dynamic? This episode is for anybody accused of being critical towards adult children, spouses or others. In an interesting thesis, Tina Gilbertson suggests what might be going on that's coming across as criticism, and what you can do about it. Changing relationship dynamics takes time. But if you know where to begin, you can get started today even if your adult child isn't currently in contact. For information on why adult children become estranged (or "go no-contact") and what parents can do about it, read Tina's book, Reconnecting With Your Estranged Adult Child. Reconnection Club members can discuss this and every episode in the General Discussion forum inside the Reconnection Club. Not a member yet? Learn more and join.
Getting along with in-laws is an age-old tradition, but also a challenge for many. When your adult child appears to be estranged because their partner doesn't like you, it can feel like a hurtful and impossible situation. The partner may seem like a cruel and powerful gatekeeper, standing between you and your child and grandchild(ren). Resentment soon follows. And things go downhill from there. Although this may not be an easy problem to solve, you'll want to make sure you've truly done everything you can to make repairs from your end. This episode is for every unwillingly estranged parent who's tried in vain to win over an adult child's partner. You'll learn five separate (and possibly overlapping) reasons why the partner doesn't seem to like you and, more importantly, what you can do about it. For more information on why adult children become estranged (or “go no-contact”) and what parents can do about it, read Reconnecting With Your Estranged Adult Child by Tina Gilbertson. Reconnection Club members can discuss this and every episode in the General Discussion forum inside the Reconnection Club. Not a member yet? Learn more and join. EPISODE RESOURCES: Reconnection Club Podcast Ep. 131: Preparing for Family Therapy
Reconciliation between parents and no-contact adult children can be thought of as a phase of estrangement. That means that for many parents, reconciliation will be disappointing – at least for a while. Things aren't back to normal. Conversation doesn't flow. You might still feel estranged, even though there's contact. What's going on? In this episode, Tina normalizes some of the disappointing and frustrating aspects of reconciliation. She explains that it's nobody's fault, and that it may require continued personal and interpersonal development. If your adult child's behavior seems unpredictable even though they're supposed to be reconciled, it doesn't mean the process has stalled. It may simply mean that it's getting under way. EPISODE RESOURCES: Reconnection Club Podcast Ep. 164: Emotional Safety Reconnection Club Podcast Ep. 171: Understanding Ambivalence Reconnection Club Podcast Ep. 144: What's Your Strategy? Reconnection Club Podcast Ep. 97: Road Map to Reconnection (Part 1) For more information on why adult children become estranged (or "go no-contact") and what parents can do about it, read Tina Gilbertson's book, Reconnecting With Your Estranged Adult Child. Reconnection Club members can discuss this and every episode in the General Discussion forum inside the Reconnection Club. Not a member yet? Learn more and join.
Are you struggling with the pain and complexity of parent-adult-child alienation? In this eye-opening conversation with psychotherapist, author, and ReConnection Club founder Tina Gilbertson, we uncover the root causes and contributing factors to this challenging family dynamic, and explore strategies for healing and reconnection.Throughout our discussion, we examine how values, loyalties, financial problems, sibling issues, and infertility can contribute to estrangement. Tina enlightens us on the role our individualistic culture plays in this issue and shares her insights on reconnecting with adult children through personal healing, growth, and addressing any underlying issues before seeking family therapy.We also dive into navigating communication with estranged children, and the heartache that comes with feeling disconnected. Learn how to avoid making a difficult situation worse and the importance of understanding and healing family estrangement. Don't miss this valuable opportunity to gain guidance and support from Tina's expertise and compassionate approach as you work towards resolution and reconnection.Please support us with a monthly PATREON subscription and get a quarterly live Q&A with Ellen and Tish.Obsessions Tish: Glass meal prep containers! Meal prep is how Tish is teaching her youngest son Liam to cook!Ellen: custom M&Ms. She did these for the class of 2023 in school colors but you can do NBA, weddings, birthdays, Father's Day, and showers! What we talk about in this episode: estrangement, divorce, shame, the ReConnection podcast, therapy, family therapy, personal work, growth, boundaries, healing, parental alienation, open heart, emotional toolbox, and Tina's two books: Constructive Wallowing and Reconnecting With Your Adult Estranged Child. Give us a review... Click hereWant to start podcasting? Click here to let Buzzsprout know we sent you, this gets you a $20 Amazon gift card if you sign up for a paid plan, and help support our show Support the show
In part 1 of this discussion, we talked about the common reasons why estrangement happens with an adult child and four things you can do starting today to put yourself on the path of reconnection. In part 2, Tina offers five specific things not to do if you have an estranged child, some real stories of reconciled relationships, and an unexpected takeaway that applies to all of us, whether you currently have an estranged adult child, or not.Tina Gilbert is a Psychotherapist, Author, Estrangement Consultant, and author of Reconnecting with Your Estranged Adult Child: Practical Tips and Tools to Heal Your Relationship. She cuts through the blame, shame, and guilt on both sides of the broken relationship and offers techniques and tools to parents who have felt powerless. She believes reconciliation is a step-by-step process, but the effort is worth it. It is never too late to renew relations and experience better-than-ever bonds.In this episode, we talk about:What not to do when attempting to repair an estranged relationshipSuccessful reconnections between parents and estranged childrenThe importance of self-compassion when it feels that life isn't fairHere's a glance:[2:41] Tina shares a few strategies many parents try but are not effective in repairing an estranged relationship.[9:45] Stories of successful reconnections between adult children and parents.[17:46] Why allowing time to pass could be what is needed to heal a relationship when nothing else is working.[25:07] Keys to finding self-compassion when it feels that life isn't fair.[30:22] Tina explains why Self-compassion Cinnamon Cookie is the nail color she would choose to heal relationships.[34:12] In the Flip the Chip segment, Mary highlights Tina's five things not to do if you are currently estranged from your adult child.Shareables:“Continually reaching out, in some cases, will actually do more harm than good. In other cases, it won't make a difference.” — Tina Gilbertson on @livelikeyournailcolor“I hear regularly from parents who have managed to reconnect with their kids. There's a certain point at which the parent takes ownership of the problem and says "I am going to figure this out”. You have to overcome shame to do it.” — Tina Gilbertson on @livelikeyournailcolor“Most estrangements are temporary.” — Tina Gilbertson on @livelikeyournailcolorDiscover more about Tina: TinaGilbertson.comReconnecting with Your Estranged Adult Child: Practical Tips and Tools to Heal Your RelationshipReconnection Club PodcastReconnection ClubFor more inspiration and fun: Take the quiz and discover your nail color persona: mynailcolorpersona.comRate, Review, & Follow on Apple Podcasts —“Mary and the Live Like Your Nail Color podcast is inspiring and fun!”
Parents whose adult children have cut them off often wonder: How did this happen? Where did I go wrong? What happened to my loving child? Over time, holidays, birthdays, and even the birth of a grandchild may all pass - in silence. But there is hope. Today's gal pal is Tina Gilbertson. Tina is a Psychotherapist, Author, Estrangement Consultant, and author of Reconnecting with Your Estranged Adult Child: Practical Tips and Tools to Heal Your Relationship. She cuts through the blame, shame, and guilt on both sides of the broken relationship and offers techniques and tools to parents who have felt powerless. She believes reconciliation is a step-by-step process, but the effort is well worth it. It is never too late to renew relations and experience better-than-ever bonds.In this episode, we talk about:The importance of self-compassionHow to not feel powerless when there is estrangement in the familyHow early wounding affects our closest relationshipsEncouraging emotional resilience within ourselvesHere's a glance:[5:47] Tina is a Naked Nelly who simply doesn't concern herself with any more personal grooming than necessary.[8:02] What issues fuel parent-adult child estrangement?[16:50] What parents can do to reconcile a relationship with an estranged adult child.[24:45] Four key points to help parents not to feel powerless.[32:58] How early wounding affects relationships and the benefits of speaking with a qualified counselor.[42:04] Finding emotional resilience within yourself.[43:44] In the Flip the Chip segment, Mary highlights the four things parents can start doing today if they have an estranged child.Shareables:“The first thing [parents] want to try to do is to take some time to understand the reasons, from the child's point of view, why they're seeking distance.” — Tina Gilbertson on @livelikeyournailcolor“If we haven't maybe received enough compassion and empathy in our lives, we don't know what it looks like or what it feels like to experience that.” — Tina Gilbertson on @livelikeyournailcolor“Resilience is the ability to come back into equilibrium emotionally.” — Tina Gilbertson on @livelikeyournailcolorDiscover more about Tina: TinaGilbertson.comReconnecting with Your Estranged Adult Child: Practical Tips and Tools to Heal Your RelationshipReconnection Club PodcastReconnection ClubInstagram Facebook here and hereFor more inspiration and fun:Take the quiz and discover your nail color persona: mynailcolorpersona.comRate, Review, & Follow on Apple Podcasts —“Mary and the Live Like Your Nail Color podcast is inspiring and fun!”
HEART TO HEART with PSYCHOTHERAPIST AND HOST OF THE RECONNECTION CLUB PODCAST, TINA GILBERTSON Tina Gilbertson specializes in supporting parents of estranged adult children. In addition to her weekly podcast, Ms. Gilbertson has written several books including Constructive Wallowing: How to Beat Bad Feelings By Letting Yourself Have Them, and Reconnecting with Your Adult Child. Please listen to the wisdom she shares with me over the course of several segments. --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app
HEART TO HEART with PSYCHOTHERAPIST AND HOST OF THE RECONNECTION CLUB PODCAST, TINA GILBERTSON Tina Gilbertson specializes in supporting parents of estranged adult children. In addition to her weekly podcast, Ms. Gilbertson has written several books including Constructive Wallowing: How to Beat Bad Feelings By Letting Yourself Have Them, and Reconnecting with Your Adult Child. Please listen to the wisdom she shares with me over the course of several segments.
In this episode, Kreed discusses the difference in a relationship with your adult child vs a peer and why this is so important to recognize. And understand. Tina Gilbertson, psychotherapist - The Reconnection Club podcast https://www.youtube.com/c/ReconnectionClub http://www.TheEstrangedHeart.com Facebook support group facilitated by Kreed: https://www.facebook.com/groups/estrangedmotherssupportgroup If you wish to become a financial supporter of the podcast and Kreed's work with estranged parents & adult children: https://anchor.fm/theestrangedheart/support https://www.patreon.com/theestrangedheart Venmo: @revkreed https://www.buymeacoffee.com/kreedrevere --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/theestrangedheart/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/theestrangedheart/support
HEART TO HEART with PSYCHOTHERAPIST AND HOST OF THE RECONNECTION CLUB PODCAST, TINA GILBERTSON Tina Gilbertson specializes in supporting parents of estranged adult children. In addition to her weekly podcast, Ms. Gilbertson has written several books including Constructive Wallowing: How to Beat Bad Feelings By Letting Yourself Have Them, and Reconnecting with Your Adult Child. Please listen to the wisdom she shares with me over the course of several segments. --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app
HEART TO HEART with PSYCHOTHERAPIST AND HOST OF THE RECONNECTION CLUB PODCAST, TINA GILBERTSON Tina Gilbertson specializes in supporting parents of estranged adult children. In addition to her weekly podcast, Ms. Gilbertson has written several books including Constructive Wallowing: How to Beat Bad Feelings By Letting Yourself Have Them, and Reconnecting with Your Adult Child. Please listen to the wisdom she shares with me over the course of several segments.
HEART TO HEART with PSYCHOTHERAPIST AND HOST OF THE RECONNECTION CLUB PODCAST, TINA GILBERTSON Tina Gilbertson specializes in supporting parents of estranged adult children. In addition to her weekly podcast, Ms. Gilbertson has written several books including Constructive Wallowing: How to Beat Bad Feelings By Letting Yourself Have Them, and Reconnecting with Your Adult Child. Please listen to the wisdom she shares with me over the course of several segments. --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app
If you missed Part One of our interview with Tina Gilbertson, please take a listen to that really helpful conversation about dealing with our emotions! In Part Two of our interview, Tina shares many resources to help address the very challenging situation of an estranged relationship between parents and adult children. Links below provide ways to find these helpful options. Find Tina Resources Related to this Episode:Tina's article on dealing with relationship estrangementsTina's podcast for estrangement issuesTina's community for estranged parentsDr. Joshua Coleman webpageUK-based Estrangement Resources websiteUS-based Estrangement Resources websiteDealing with ambiguous lossTrauma LinksACES quizTrauma Chat podcastContact Us!! Hope on FBNew Hope New Liberty CounselingEmail: hope.brown@nhnlc.comTwitter
In this episode Kreed asks and explores the question: Is the parent/child relationship a contract or gift or something else? Quote: "All relationships, except those that are familial, are by choice. Even the relationship from the perspective of a parent to a child is by choice yet not the other way around. Is it any wonder those relationships we have with family are so fraught with resistance and discord?" - Kreed Revere http://www.TheEstrangedHeart.com https://www.facebook.com/groups/estrangedmotherssupportgroup https://anchor.fm/theestrangedheart/support https://www.patreon.com/theestrangedheart https://www.ling.upenn.edu/courses/Fall_2003/ling001/language_change.html#:~:text=Types%20of%20Language%20Change,and%20morphology%20develops%20or%20decays. Reconnection Club podcast episode (Tina Gilbertson, LPC (estrangement expert) #116 - https://youtu.be/nsV-VNKDEHA --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/theestrangedheart/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/theestrangedheart/support
HEART TO HEART with PSYCHOTHERAPIST AND HOST OF THE RECONNECTION CLUB PODCAST, TINA GILBERTSON Tina Gilbertson specializes in supporting parents of estranged adult children. In addition to her weekly podcast, Ms. Gilbertson has written several books including Constructive Wallowing: How to Beat Bad Feelings By Letting Yourself Have Them, and Reconnecting with Your Adult Child. Please listen to the wisdom she shares with me over the course of several segments. --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app
HEART TO HEART with PSYCHOTHERAPIST AND HOST OF THE RECONNECTION CLUB PODCAST, TINA GILBERTSON Tina Gilbertson specializes in supporting parents of estranged adult children. In addition to her weekly podcast, Ms. Gilbertson has written several books including Constructive Wallowing: How to Beat Bad Feelings By Letting Yourself Have Them, and Reconnecting with Your Adult Child. Please listen to the wisdom she shares with me over the course of several segments. --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app
While we are publishing episodes less frequently these days, we are certainly embracing the motto of “quality over quantity”, and we're so glad to have the opportunity to bring you this enlightening conversation with author and psychotherapist Tina Gilbertson. Resources Related to this Episode:Forgiveness Article by Tina Find Tina Contact Us!! Hope on FB New Hope New Liberty Counseling Email: hope.brown@nhnlc.com Twitter
HEART TO HEART with PSYCHOTHERAPIST AND HOST OF THE RECONNECTION CLUB PODCAST, TINA GILBERTSON Tina Gilbertson specializes in supporting parents of estranged adult children. In addition to her weekly podcast, Ms. Gilbertson has written several books including Constructive Wallowing: How to Beat Bad Feelings By Letting Yourself Have Them and Reconnecting with Your Adult Child. Please listen to the wisdom she shares with me over the course of several segments. --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app
What do you do when your adult child ghosts you? In this episode, Gretta is joined by Tina Gilbertson, who is a psychotherapist, author, and co-founder of the Reconnection Club. Tina's work is centered around educating and supporting parents who want to reconnect with their estranged adult children. If your child has ghosted you, this is a must-listen. Learn More about Tina Gilbertson:Tina's Website The Reconnection ClubThe Reconnection Club Podcast, a show dedicated to helping parents understand and address common issues in estrangement. Connect with Gretta:Private Coaching with GrettaFree Guide: What to Say To Your GhostFree Coping With Ghosting GuideInstagramFree Facebook Support Grouphttps://www.copingwithghosting.com/If you have a question about being ghosted that you want answered in an upcoming joint episode with The Ghost Podcast, please email Gretta at copingwithghosting@gmail.com. Music: "Ghosted" by Gustavo RamosDisclaimer: This information is designed to mentor and guide you to cope with Ghosting by cultivating a positive mindset and implementing self-care practices. It is for educational purposes only; it solely provides self-help tools for your use. Coping With Ghosting is not providing health care or psychological therapy services and is not diagnosing or treating any physical or mental ailment of the mind or body. The content is not a substitute for therapy or any advice given by a licensed psychologist or other licensed or other registered professionals.
HEART TO HEART with PSYCHOTHERAPIST AND HOST OF THE RECONNECTION CLUB PODCAST, TINA GILBERTSON Tina Gilbertson specializes in supporting parents of estranged adult children. In addition to her weekly podcast, Ms. Gilbertson has written several books including Constructive Wallowing: How to Beat Bad Feelings By Letting Yourself Have Them and Reconnecting with Your Adult Child. Please listen to the wisdom she shares with me over the course of several segments. --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app
Join us as Psychotherapist Tina Gilbertson, author of Constructive Wallowing: How to Beat Bad Feelings By Letting Yourself Have Them and Reconnecting With Your Estranged Adult Child and host of The Reconnection Club Podcast provides expert adulting guidance! --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/be-the-adult/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/be-the-adult/support
On this episode of Psychology Talk Podcast, Dr. Hoye is joined by Tina Gilbertson. Tina holds a master's degree in counseling psychology, and she is a licensed professional counselor (LPC) in Oregon and Colorado. She discusses her new book Reconnecting with your Estranged Adult Child: Practical Tips & Tools to Heal Your Relationship, published by New World Library. Tina primarily works with the parents off estranged adult children in her private practice. They discuss the pain involved with having an estranged adult child. They also issues of attachment involved with this issue, and ways to manage and cope with these difficult, painfully relationship problems.The Psychology Talk Podcast is a unique conversation about psychology around the globe. Your hosts Dr. Scott Hoye and licensed clinical professional counselor Kyle Miller talk about psychology with mental health practitioners and experts to keep you informed about issues and trends in the industry. They also tackle mental health trends and issues in their home: Chicago.https://psych-talk.comhttps://www.instagram.com/psychtalkpodcast/https://www.facebook.com/psychtalkpodcast
The Estranged Heart podcast debut episode! Tune in to learn more about the podcast and its trajectory as well as the host, Kreed Revere, a formerly estranged and now reconciled parent of two adult children, and her perspective on estrangement. SHOW NOTES Join TEHP online at: https://www.facebook.com/theestrangedheart https://www.instagram.com/theestrangedheart/ Articles: Why Parents Get Estranged by Dr. Joshua Coleman https://www.theatlantic.com/family/archive/2021/01/why-parents-and-kids-get-estranged/617612/ Who is Brene Brown? https://brenebrown.com/about/ Books: Rules of Estrangement by Dr. Joshua Coleman, psychotherapist Reconnecting with Your Estranged Adult Child by Tina Gilbertson, psychotherapist Constructive Wallowing by Tina Gilbertson, psychotherapist Videos: How to Become a Better Parent: Positive vs Toxic Parenting Tips by Dr. Gabor Mate https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fcPPDbvGr7s Online Support Groups: https://www.facebook.com/groups/drjoshuacolemanestrangement https://www.facebook.com/groups/EstrangedParentsofAdultChildrenCornerMeeting Therapists: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/theestrangedheart/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/theestrangedheart/support
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How do you repair an estranged parent child relationship? Is it still possible to fix all the damages that were made? In this episode of Your SuperPowered Mind, host Kristin Maxwell talks with guest Tina Gilbertson about the factors that divide families -- and how to repair those rifts. Tina also shares what parents [...]
Welcome back to Therapy Chat! In this week's episode host Laura Reagan, LCSW-C shares feedback sent in by listeners in response to last week's episode with Tina Gilbertson. Laura responds to the listeners' comments and shares her perspective. After that, you will hear a replay of a past episode on why the holidays can be difficult and what can help (even though this was recorded before Coronavirus, it's relevant!). Then listen in for a replay of a past interview with recent guest Sharon Martin, LCSW on the dynamics and communication patterns that are common in abusive and dysfunctional families, and how it can impact us. Thank you to this episode's sponsor, TherapyNotes. Get a 2 month free trial of TherapyNotes by going to www.TherapyNotes.com and using the promo code TherapyChat. Resources https://sharonmartincounseling.com Want a cool Therapy Chat t-shirt, sticker or mug? Find them here: https://www.teepublic.com/user/therapychat Leave me a message via Speakpipe by going to https://therapychatpodcast.com and clicking on the green Speakpipe button. Thank you for listening to Therapy Chat! Please be sure to go to iTunes and leave a rating and review, subscribe and download episodes. You can also download the Therapy Chat app on iTunes by clicking here. Podcast produced by Pete Bailey - https://petebailey.net/audio
Welcome back to Therapy Chat! This week, host Laura Reagan, LCSW-C speaks with Tina Gilbertson, the author of Reconnecting with Your Estranged Adult Child. As the winter holidays approach, many families will have uncomfortable conversations happening about politics. Many families have found relationships strained by the stress of the political situation in our country. Laura and Tina discussed how family estrangement happens and what parents who want to reconnect with their estranged adult children can do to repair their relationships. Tina Gilbertson is a psychotherapist and author of Reconnecting with Your Estranged Adult Child. Her work has been featured in Forbes, Fast Company, Glamour, Real Simple and Redbook. In 2019, Tina cofounded www.ReconnectionClub.com, offering education, community, and support to help estranged parents repair their relationships with their adult children. Originally from Vancouver, B.C., Canada, she now lives in Denver, CO. Find out more about her work at www.TinaGilbertson.com. Thank you to this episode's sponsor, TherapyNotes. Get a 2 month free trial of TherapyNotes by going to www.TherapyNotes.com and using the promo code TherapyChat. Resources www.TinaGilbertson.com Want a cool Therapy Chat t-shirt, sticker or mug? Find them here: https://www.teepublic.com/user/therapychat Leave me a message via Speakpipe by going to https://therapychatpodcast.com and clicking on the green Speakpipe button. Thank you for listening to Therapy Chat! Please be sure to go to iTunes and leave a rating and review, subscribe and download episodes. You can also download the Therapy Chat app on iTunes by clicking here. Podcast produced by Pete Bailey - https://petebailey.net/audio
If you’ve ever dealt with estrangement, you know how painful—or even shameful—it can feel. In this episode, we will be talking to Tina Gilbertson, author of the book, Reconnecting with Your Estranged Adult Child. She has a lot of incredible insight and support to share when it comes to dealing with an estranged relationship in a positive and productive way. Listen in as Tina offers support, understanding, and tools to help repair a relationship that has been cut off, distanced, or rejected. You will learn some really helpful ideas for reconnecting with estranged children and finding the necessary support to heal yourself and your relationship with an estranged child. If this is something you or someone you know is suffering from, we sincerely hope this episode will help bring you closer to peace and solutions that mend fences and lives. 0:54 – 8:25 - Who Tina Gilbertson is and how she helps parents navigate estranged relationships. 8:26 – 10:21 - Reasons that children reject and distance themselves from their parents. 10:22 – 22:50 - What parents can do when they have been alienated from their child. 22:51 – 27:40 - What to do when you’re the parent left in the picture or a step-parent in an estranged situation. 27:41 – 32:32 - Strategies and options to repair the estranged relationship. 32:33 - 42:16 – Success stories, reconnections, and what happens after estrangement. Takeaways: Why parents have more power. The role parents play in alienation. What to do in an alienation situation and when to actually reach out. How to support your child during an alienation situation. How to make relationship repairs on your own. The options you have to repair the relationship Quotes: “It’s random who ends up with estrangement and who doesn’t. I don’t think you can draw a line between terrible parenting and estrangement.” - Tina Gilbertson "Keep in mind, especially with people around the age of leaving home, there comes a time when they just need a little space, so it’s important not to panic. Give them space and trust that they will come back when they’re ready.” - Tina Gilbertson "An apology is much more easily digested by the child than, 'Let’s sit down and fix this.'" - Tina Gilbertson 3 Interesting Clips: 10:20 – 11:10 - Why divorce isn’t always the reason for estrangement. 13:21 – 14:46 - The difference between alienating behavior and actual successful alienation. 16:05 – 16:47 - How to approach a child and the power of an apology. Links: Tina Gilbertson: Website Reconnecting With Your Estranged Adult Child by Tina Gilbertson The Reconnection Club Podcast Connect with us: Instagram | Facebook | YouTube Everything Always Podcast Website Subscribe & Review in iTunes! Are you subscribed to our podcast? If not, we would strongly suggest you do. This way you won’t miss a thing! Subscribe here: Everything Always And now for the pretty please with a Bordeaux Maraschino Cherry on top. We would be so incredibly grateful if you left us a review on for Everything Always as well. This will help other parents and families like you find our podcast. Plus, it’s fun for Mike and I to sit and read them together on date night! Just click here, click open in iTunes, select “Ratings and Reviews”, tell us your favorite moment and best take away and we will send a huge cyber hug and kiss right to you! Find the Everything Always Podcast wherever you listen! Apple Podcasts (iTunes) acast Pocketcasts ListenNotes Spotify player.fm
On this episode of Psychology Talk Podcast, Dr. Hoye is joined by Tina Gilbertson. Tina holds a master’s degree in counseling psychology, and she is a licensed professional counselor (LPC) in Oregon and Colorado. She discusses her new book Reconnecting with your Estranged Adult Child: Practical Tips & Tools to Heal Your Relationship, published by New World Library. Tina primarily works with the parents off estranged adult children in her private practice. They discuss the pain involved with having an estranged adult child. They also issues of attachment involved with this issue, and ways to manage and cope with these difficult, painfully relationship problems.
Reconnecting with Your Estranged Adult Child: Tina GilbertsonWhen your adult child won’t talk to you (or your spouse), it’s heart-breaking. You feel sad whenever you think about it, which is often. You wonder what you did to deserve this, if anything. Maybe you’re angry — why does he or she have to do this to you, or to the family? You feel embarrassed when asked about your child. You don’t know what to tell people. It’s humiliating … and so very sad, not to be able to talk about your own child with pride and ease. Not to be able to talk to your own child is more painful than anyone who hasn’t been through it can readily understand. In that sense, estrangement is a problem that isolates you. You feel like you’re the only parent in the world living with this awful situation. But you’re not. There are ways to reconnect. Let us explore them.Tina Gilbertson is a psychotherapist and the author of Reconnecting with Your Estranged Adult Child. Her work has been featured in Forbes, Fast Company, Glamour, Real Simple and Redbook. In 2019, Tina cofounded ReconnectionClub.com, offering education, community, and support to help estranged parents repair their relationships with their adult children. Originally from Vancouver, B.C., Canada, she now lives in Denver, CO. Find out more about her work at www.TinaGilbertson.comLearn more about Simran here:www.iamsimran.comwww.1111mag.com/
ep-201-reconnecting-with-your-estranged-inner-child ( http://radiomd.com/media/k2/items/cache/006a354e7d9bad5d58676268916d0071_Generic.jpg ) Relationships with our parents, even the best ones, hit rough spots every so often. But for some, those rough spots grow, and last and lead to an estranged relationship between parent and child. Relationships with our parents, even the best ones, hit rough spots every so often. But for some, those rough spots grow, and last and lead to an estranged relationship between parent and child. An online survey found that 60% of parents claim their child never explained why they needed to cut off their relationship. Tina Gilbertson is a psychotherapist, author, and co-founder of the Reconnection Club ( https://reconnectionclub.com ) , offering education, community, and support to help estranged parents repair their relationships with their adult children. We hear about her book Reconnecting with Your Estranged Adult Child, the most common reasons children and parents become estranged, generational and cultural differences, as well as where to begin the journey to repairing this relationship.
When your adult child won't talk to you (or your spouse), it's heart-breaking. You feel sad whenever you think about it, which is often. You wonder what you did to deserve this, if anything. Maybe you're angry — why does he or she have to do this to you, or to the family? You feel embarrassed when asked about your child. You don't know what to tell people. It's humiliating … and so very sad, not to be able to talk about your own child with pride and ease. Not to be able to talk to your own child is more painful than anyone who hasn't been through it can readily understand. In that sense, estrangement is a problem that isolates you. You feel like you're the only parent in the world living with this awful situation. But you're not. There are ways to reconnect. Let us explore them.
When your adult child won’t talk to you (or your spouse), it’s heart-breaking. You feel sad whenever you think about it, which is often. You wonder what you did to deserve this, if anything. Maybe you’re angry — why does he or she have to do this to you, or to the family? You feel embarrassed when asked about your child. You don’t know what to tell people. It’s humiliating … and so very sad, not to be able to talk about your own child with pride and ease. Not to be able to talk to your own child is more painful than anyone who hasn’t been through it can readily understand. In that sense, estrangement is a problem that isolates you. You feel like you’re the only parent in the world living with this awful situation. But you’re not. There are ways to reconnect. Let us explore them.
Parenting adult children and maintaining strong relationships with adult children, takes adjustment and flexibility. As parents get older, so do their children. While you'll always be their parent, the lives of adult children bring new dynamics and complexities. Careers, spouses, and in-laws enter the picture. And sometimes family estrangement can occur. In this episode of our retirement podcast, our guest is Tina Gilbertson, author of Reconnecting with Your Estranged Adult Child. We discuss with Tina: What the research shows about how common this is and how it's trending What causes some relationships with adult children to fracture The different types of estrangement How the path to reconciliation begins What successful reconciliations have in common How to keep relationships with adult children healthy Tina joins us from Denver, Colorado. __________________________ Wise Quotes On Compassion "The first step to reconciliation is to recognize that reconciliation is required and find compassion for yourself for finding yourself in this painful, difficult, sometimes excruciating position. Compassion is always the very first step...So the first step is self-compassion. That's also important because when you can find compassion for yourself, you naturally find that you feel more compassion also for your child. And that is a good basis for forming a connection. That mutual compassion is sort of I'm okay. You're okay. I'm a good person. You're a good person. That's why that in my mind is Step One." On Boundaries "...When we talk about healthy relationships, one thing that almost automatically comes up is boundaries and respecting boundaries. And some people don't like the concept of boundaries because it feels aggressive or it feels cold. But I think that is a misinterpretation of what boundaries are meant to do. We have fences around our yards, but we also have always a gate in the fence that can be opened and closed. It's not a moat. It's just saying, this is my yard. And that is not my yard. And so respecting boundaries is an important thing for parents to do with adult children. But it's also a thing too, that they need to require of everyone else, including their adult child. "And it may seem it's counterintuitive to talk to a parent. Who's been rejected on willingly about holding her own boundaries. And yet it's terribly important because many parents feel like doormats like their child is walking all over them." _________________________ Bio Tina Gilbertson is a psychotherapist who specializes in supporting parents of estranged adult children and is the founder of the Reconnection Club, the essential online resource for parents of estranged adult children. She is the author of Constructive Wallowing: How to Beat Bad Feelings By Letting Yourself Have Them and Reconnecting with Your Estranged Adult Child. Her weekly podcast is called The Reconnection Club Podcast. As an expert on relationships and communication, she's been featured in dozens of media outlets including Forbes, The Washington Post, The Chicago Tribune, and Fast Company. Tina holds a master's degree in counseling psychology, is licensed as an LPC in Colorado and Oregon, and is also a Board-Certified Telemental Health Provider, offering online therapy to clients in both states. Though her office is currently in Denver, she offers training and consulting all over the world. ___________________________ For More on Tina Gilbertson Tina's website Her latest book Reconnecting with Your Estranged Adult Child ___________________________ Podcast Episodes You May Like The Skill Set for Life’s Transitions – Bruce Feiler Can You Grow Younger? – Marta Zaraska How Life Hacks Can Help Make Your Retirement the Best Time of Your Life – Sam Horn Why Settle for Happiness in Your Retirement? – Emily Esfahani Smith Advice for Successful Career Women Transitioning to Retirement – Helen Dennis...
Age brings about a number of challenges in many areas of our lives. Without a doubt, one of the most painful of these is that, for a variety of reasons, we can lose connection with our adult children. Our guest, Tina Gilbertson, MA, LPC, is a psychotherapist and also the author of an incredibly helpful book, Reconnecting with Your Estranged Adult Child. Her work has been featured in Forbes, Fast Company, Glamour, Real Simple and Redbook. In 2019, Tina cofounded www.ReconnectionClub.com, offering education, community, and support to help estranged parents repair their relationships with their older children. Tina joins us to share her thoughts on this horribly hurtful experience and demonstrated techniques we can use to mend those vital relationships. If you, or anyone you care about, is experiencing the trauma of an estranged relationship with your/their adult children, you won’t want to miss this one!
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“As long as the factors that led your child to create distance remain in place, he or she will not be able to settle into an easy, relaxed, loving, and close relationship with you.” “What you do in response to estrangement very much matters and can make the difference between a prolonged estrangement and a healed one.” When children grow into adults, the nature of the parent-child relationship changes as well. On this episode, I talk with Tina Gilbertson, psychotherapist and author of Reconnecting with your Estranged Child. Her book is a quality, comprehensive resource and guide for parents who are ready and wanting to heal this rift that’s come between themselves and their adult child. Throughout our conversation, Tina offers profound compassion for parents and children with this type of strained relationship, along with tips on how to heal. She explains why it’s essential to allow your child space to grow, why they may have felt the estrangement was necessary, and how parents can reflect on the reasons why this estrangement occurred. About Tina Gilbertson: Located in Denver, CO, Tina works as a psychotherapist, speaker, and author of the book Reconnecting with your Estranged Child. She specializes in estrangement counseling, particularly for parents rejected by adult children. In 2019, Tina co-founded the Reconnection Club, where she offers education, community, and support to help estranged parents repair their estranged relationships with their adult children. Some Questions I Ask: How were you drawn to this work? (2:43) What does it mean to be estranged from your adult child? (6:38) How does estrangement happen? (13:40) Could you talk about the significance of unmet shared needs between an estranged parent and child? (22:21) What are the do’s and don’ts for a parent with a child who has asserted a no-contact relationship? (34:58) How can an estranged parent approach a child that’s been alienated from them at a young age? (40:50) In This Episode, You Will Learn: What motivated Tina to write her book (2:10) How parents still have power and influence within their relationships with their children. (5:58) The various types of estrangement. (6:41) What factors contribute to the estranged relationships between parents and children. (13:47) How estrangement functions as an act of self-preservation. (20:31) How finding self-compassion enables acceptance of others. (26:03) Why contact is not the solution to estrangement. (27:36) How parents can sit with and move through feelings of abandonment, panic, and desperation after a child goes no-contact. (35:14) Connect with Tina Gilbertson: Website Reconnecting with your Estranged Adult Child by Tina Gilbertson Reconnection Club Website The Reconnection Club Podcast
What if you were publicly blamed for the 9/11 attacks? In Virginia Buckingham's memoir, On My Watch, she explains just how that happened, and how she rebuilt her life after these traumatic events. Virginia Buckingham was the seventh of eight children born to blue-collar parents. A truly self-made success story, Buckingham has lived in Massachusetts for nearly 40 years and spent many of those shattering glass ceilings: She was the first woman to serve as chief of staff to two consecutive Massachusetts governors and was subsequently the first woman appointed to head that state’s Port Authority, owner and operator of Logan International Airport. She has also worked as a deputy editorial page editor and columnist for the Boston Herald. In 2015, Buckingham was selected for the inaugural class of Presidential Leadership Scholars, a joint initiative of the presidential libraries of Presidents George H. W. Bush, George W. Bush, Bill Clinton, and Lyndon Johnson. Finishing On My Watch was her Presidential Leadership project, a key element of the program, which teaches scholars to apply leadership lessons from those presidencies, such as courage and resilience. https://www.virginiabuckingham.com Do you need to reconnect with a loved one that doesn't speak to you? In Tina's book Reconnecting with Your Estranged Adult Child: Practical Tips and Tools to Heal Your Relationship, she shares tips and tools to making those connections and getting over the hurtles of past pain and disappointment. Tina Gilbertson is a psychotherapist and author, her work has been featured in Forbes, Fast Company, Glamour, Real Simple and Redbook. In 2019, Tina cofounded the Reconnection Club, offering education, community, and support to help estranged parents repair their relationships with their adult children. www.TinaGilbertson.com
The Dr. Pat Show: Talk Radio to Thrive By!: Reconnecting With Your Estranged Adult Children: Practical Tips and Tools to Heal Your Relationship with Tina Gilbertson
The Dr. Pat Show: Talk Radio to Thrive By!: Reconnecting With Your Estranged Adult Children: Practical Tips and Tools to Heal Your Relationship with Tina Gilbertson
You might seek out an estrangement specialist for therapy, because you want someone with a certain amount of compassion for what you’re going through – probably someone who’s been there. This is true of most estrangement specialists. Apart from your podcast host, Tina Gilbertson, most professionals who specialize in estrangement coaching are, or have been, involved in their own estrangements. In this episode, Tina shares both good and bad news. The bad news is that estrangement specialists are exceedingly hard to find, and there probably isn't one near you. The good news is, you really don’t need a specialist in estrangement, or even someone who’s been there themselves, to get good support. Research on compassion for distress indicates that people who’ve been there and overcome estrangement may be less, not more, compassionate than people who’ve never experienced what you’re going through. That's counter-intuitive, but apparently true of these folks as a group (not necessarily as individuals). To find a caring and competent therapist, use the suggestions outlined in the episode, Links: https://www.goodtherapy.org/ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us
This episode is from the vault and was first released August 13, 2018 Do You Struggle with Family Rejection? Family rejection is a very common problem across the world. Many kids don’t talk to their parents and don’t even want to maintain any contact. Many of my listeners have the same problem and have estranged daughter or son living in other countries. In this episode, our guest Tina Gilbertson provides helpful insights on how to deal with family rejection. She is a Colorado-based psychotherapist who helps repair estranged relationships between parents and their children. Gilbertson found the problem so common among her clients that she wrote three books and a ton of articles on the subject. She will be giving out important tips on how to deal with family rejection and get talking with your estranged children. Every relationship has a chance Tina believes that every relationship has a potential to be repaired but for that, parents need to take both emotional and strategic steps. The first thing to do is to understand that your children may not be hurting you or avoiding you intentionally – it is because they have been hurt by something and hurting you back in the process. Develop compassion You have to develop a sense of self-compassion along with compassion for your children. You have to accept your mistakes and understand the grievances of your kids. Also, you may not always be at fault. Sometimes kids have a different experience because of their personality and perception without you having done anything wrong. Everybody has their temperament and you cannot do anything about it. Whatever be the case get over the parental shame and develop a mindset of compassion. Only then you will be able to get to apologize to repair the relationship. Give a good apology An apology is a gift and best tool to mend broken relationships suggests Tina. She lists out several factors that make up a good apology and open the doors of communication. To render a good and effective apology you must let all your guards down and become defenseless. Even if you are one percent defensive it will seep into your apology and make it ineffective. Tina tells us three unique factors that make up a good apology First, you need to be specific and say what you are sorry for; you should specifically speak out what you might have done wrong to hurt the person. If you are at fault, accept and clearly say you had done that. The second factor is to understand and relay back why it was hurtful to the person. For example, you can say “I’m, sorry, you didn’t deserve that” or “I’m sorry that my tone was harsh,” instead of saying that you were just sorry! The third factor is regret – you have to show that you are really sorry and regret the fact that your hurt them or did something wrong. You can add things like “if only I could take it back,” or “If I could change things..” to make your apology emotional and sincere. A good apology will break the ice and can get your children talking to you. Connect with Tina Email: tina@tinagilbertson.com Website: tinagilbertson.com Books Reconnecting with Your Estranged Adult Child Constructive Wallowing The Good Breakup Guide This post of Retirement and Retirement Lifestyle first appeared on http://RockYourRetirement.com
Ashley & Patrice sit down to discuss pop culture and standing up for themselves. More specifically, whether there is a fine line between being supportive and what the tribe might call "doing too much"! How do you think this episode will end? Resources: Paula Rogo for Essence, "Alicia Keys Post Instagram Rant After Her Son Told Her He Didn't Want To Be Judged For Wearing His Rainbow Manicure" November 10, 2019. Tina Gilbertson for Psychology Today, "6 Tips for Setting Better Boundaries", July 25, 2014. Carty-Williams, Candace. (2019) Queenie. Ashley Wilder for Creatively Nomadic, "R.E.S.P.E.C.T" September 23, 2019. https://www.creativelynomadic.com/new-blog/q8pqhhlszyd9re3o74vup93czn69mp Janet & Jo, https://www.janetandjo.com/ Music: "Something on October 16th" Kenny Waller, (2019).
This episode introduces you to your host, Tina Gilbertson, and what this show is all about. I talk about where I'm coming from (and not coming from), and what I'm hoping to accomplish with this show. I also introduce you to reconnectionclub.com, the genesis of the podcast. If you’re interested in personal growth, lifelong learning and becoming your best self in addition to reconnecting with your estranged adult child, make sure you subscribe. Episode 1 is scheduled for September 2, 2019. Subscribe today and/or join our mailing list at reconnectionclub.com/mailing-list.
Do You Struggle with Family Rejection? Family rejection is a very common problem across the world. Many kids don’t talk to their parents and don’t even want to maintain any contact. Many of my listeners have the same problem and have estranged daughter or son living in other countries. In this episode, our guest Tina Gilbertson provides helpful insights on how to deal with family rejection. She is a Colorado-based psychotherapist who helps repair estranged relationships between parents and their children. Gilbertson found the problem so common among her clients that she wrote three books and a ton of articles on the subject. She will be giving out important tips on how to deal with family rejection and get talking with your estranged children. Every relationship has a chance Tina believes that every relationship has a potential to be repaired but for that, parents need to take both emotional and strategic steps. The first thing to do is to understand that your children may not be hurting you or avoiding you intentionally – it is because they have been hurt by something and hurting you back in the process. Develop compassion You have to develop a sense of self-compassion along with compassion for your children. You have to accept your mistakes and understand the grievances of your kids. Also, you may not always be at fault. Sometimes kids have a different experience because of their personality and perception without you having done anything wrong. Everybody has their temperament and you cannot do anything about it. Whatever be the case get over the parental shame and develop a mindset of compassion. Only then you will be able to get to apologize to repair the relationship. Give a good apology An apology is a gift and best tool to mend broken relationships suggests Tina. She lists out several factors that make up a good apology and open the doors of communication. To render a good and effective apology you must let all your guards down and become defenseless. Even if you are one percent defensive it will seep into your apology and make it ineffective. Tina tells us three unique factors that make up a good apology First, you need to be specific and say what you are sorry for; you should specifically speak out what you might have done wrong to hurt the person. If you are at fault, accept and clearly say you had done that. The second factor is to understand and relay back why it was hurtful to the person. For example, you can say “I’m, sorry, you didn’t deserve that” or “I’m sorry that my tone was harsh,” instead of saying that you were just sorry! The third factor is regret – you have to show that you are really sorry and regret the fact that your hurt them or did something wrong. You can add things like “if only I could take it back,” or “If I could change things..” to make your apology emotional and sincere. A good apology will break the ice and can get your children talking to you. Connect with Tina Email: tina@tinagilbertson.com Website: tinagilbertson.com Books Reconnecting with Your Estranged Adult Child Constructive Wallowing The Good Breakup Guide Image already added
In the Gold Seat is Tina Gilbertson! Tina is a psychotherapist, speaker, and author based in Denver, Colorado. She writes regularly for PsychologyToday.com and has been featured in hundreds of media outlets as an expert on relationships and communication. Tina is the author of CONSTRUCTIVE WALLOWING: HOW TO BEAT BAD FEELINGS BY LETTING YOURSELF HAVE THEM, a self-help book about how to handle difficult emotions at work, in relationships, and in life so you can make the most of all three. Here to explain an effective new way to manage anger, despair, jealousy, and other negative feelings.
Sister Jenna welcomes Therapist Tina Gilbertson to the America Meditating Radio Show. Tina Gilbertson was living the dream. She resided in New York and had inched her way up the corporate ladder to finally arrive at a successful position in television. The only problem was; it wasn't her dream – it was everyone else's. Eventually Tina's dissatisfaction led to the therapy couch; she had decided to find her answers in therapy. This time of self-examination came with a surprise; Tina uncovered her true passion— she wanted to help people as a professional counselor. After going back to college and becoming licensed, Tina found herself specializing in feelings and how people actually sabotage themselves by trying to feel emotions for which they've built no foundation. Her new book, Constructive Wallowing: How to Beat Bad Feelings by Allowing Yourself to Have Them is the result of years of hard work (on herself) as well as helping others. Tina has written feature articles on emotional intelligence and health for Portland's Natural Awakenings magazine, and contributes wisdom as a self-esteem expert for online therapist directory GoodTherapy.org. Visit TinaGilbertson.com. Watch Tina on AM Northwest. Get the OFF TO WORK CD & Off the Grid Into the Heart CD by Sister Jenna. Like America Meditating on FB & follow us on Twitter.
Sister Jenna welcomes Tina Gilbertson to the America Meditating Radio Show! Tina Gilbertson was living the dream. She resided in New York and had inched her way up the corporate ladder to finally arrive at a successful position in television. The only problem was; it wasn't her dream – it was everyone else's. Eventually Tina's dissatisfaction led to the therapy couch; she had decided to find her answers in therapy. This time of self-examination came with a surprise; Tina uncovered her true passion— she wanted to help people as a professional counselor. After going back to college and becoming licensed, Tina found herself specializing in feelings and how people actually sabotage themselves by trying to feel emotions for which they've built no foundation. Her new book, Constructive Wallowing: How to Beat Bad Feelings by Allowing Yourself to Have Them is the result of years of hard work (on herself) as well as helping others. Tina has written feature articles on emotional intelligence and health for Portland's Natural Awakenings magazine, and contributes wisdom as a self-esteem expert for online therapist directory GoodTherapy.org. Visit TinaGilbertson.com. Watch Tina on AM Northwest. Get the Off the Grid Into the Heart CD by Sister Jenna. Like America Meditating on FB & follow us on Twitter.
Tina Gilbertson was living the dream. She resided in New York and had inched her way up the corporate ladder to finally arrive at a successful position in television. The only problem was; it wasn't her dream – it was everyone else's. Eventually Tina's dissatisfaction led to the therapy couch; she had decided to find her answers in therapy. This time of self-examination came with a surprise; Tina uncovered her true passion— she wanted to help people as a professional counselor. After going back to college and becoming licensed, Tina found herself specializing in feelings and how people actually sabotage themselves by trying to feel emotions for which they've built no foundation. Her new book, Constructive Wallowing: How to Beat Bad Feelings by Allowing Yourself to Have Them is the result of years of hard work (on herself) as well as helping others. Tina has written feature articles on emotional intelligence and health for Portland's Natural Awakenings magazine, and contributes wisdom as a self-esteem expert for online therapist directory GoodTherapy.org. Visit TinaGilbertson.com. Watch Tina on AM Northwest. Get the OFF TO WORK CD & Off the Grid Into the Heart CD by Sister Jenna. Like America Meditating on FB & follow us on Twitter.
Constructive Wallowing Have you ever resisted menacing feelings like anger, grief or regret? Then notice that ignoring them makes them stick around. What if learning to accept these difficult feelings was the key to greater self-awareness? Today's guest is Tina Glbertson, a licensed mental health counselor. In addition to working with adults one-on-one, she teaches assertiveness and self-esteem workshops and classes on goal-setting, decision-making, overcoming anxiety and finding the right career. Tina is th author of Constructive Wallowing: How to Beat Bad Feelings by Letting Yourself Have Them. Susyn Reeve is the best-selling author of The Inspired Life: Unleashing Your Mind's Capacity for Joy. She has 35 years experience as a Corporate Consultant, Self-Esteem Expert and InterFaith Minister. She has been a delegate to the UN Commission on the Status of Women. (www.SusynReeve.com) Rikk Hansen is aleading experts in guiding midlife professionals and entrepreneurs to discover a life work that's truly their CALLING. As founder of Brilliant NEXT, he has pioneered a system called New Fire Discovery that guides midlife women and men to find certainty of purpose and and exciting direction for their next fulfilling work - in a short period of time despite any obstacles or fears. (www.BrilliantNEXT.com)
Tina Gilbertson, mental health counselor and author of Constructive Wallowing: How to Beat Bad Feelings by Letting Yourself have Them will be joining us. Tina teaches readers how to accept and feel their feelings with self-compassion for greater emotional health. Have you been told 'just be happy' or 'get over it' and you just can't? Are you stuck and having trouble getting going or thinking a different way? Perhaps everyone around you is just telling you what to do and you just don't feel like it? Help is on the way. It is time to go through and experience your feelings, not deny them, not put them away until another time and not stuff them into a dark place for safe keeping. Your health depends on what you do with how you feel and who you are; not just your mental health but also your physical health.For more information visit www.tinagilbertson.com
How to beat bad feelings by letting yourself have them, with therapist and author Tina Gilbertson.
Coach Cafe' Radio is THE Self Empowerment Place to Meet -Where you Get you Weekly Cup of Inspiration every Friday 11 am eastern on BlogTalk Radio with certified Law of Attraction Life Coaches Kathleen Martin, LOACC and Estra Roell, LOACC. We all have negative feelings. What do you do with yours? Chances are, when it comes to the small losses, irritations, upsets, and annoyances that the vast majority of us suffer daily and weekly, year in and year out, we say, “It could be worse” or “At least I’ve got my health.” In this effort to look on the bright side, we succeed in cutting ourselves off from the understanding and support we need most. Our guest in the Coach Cafe this week, Tina Gilbertson, self-esteem expert and author of Constructive Wallowing: How to Beat Bad Feelings by Letting Yourself Have Them, teaches us that by learning to accept and embrace, rather than suppress, difficult feelings, people can keep their sense of personal power and, better yet, gain greater understanding and ultimately esteem for themselves. Feeling bad can actually lead to feeling better, faster! Join us to find out how! Tina Gilbertson holds a master’s degree in Counseling Psychology and is a licensed mental health counselor. In addition to working with adults one-on-one, she teaches assertiveness and self-esteem workshops and classes on goal-setting, decision-making, overcoming anxiety and finding the right career. She has written feature articles on emotional intelligence and health for Portland’s Natural Awakenings magazine, and contributes wisdom as a self-esteem expert for online therapist directory GoodTherapy.org. She lives in Portland, Oregon, and can be found online at TinaGilbertson.com.
During this weeks radio show you will learn about: What is constructive about wallowing? Fear of our own emotions Is anger really toxic? Buddha’s way to happy Mindfulness of emotion
During this weeks radio show you will learn about: What is constructive about wallowing? Fear of our own emotions Is anger really toxic? Buddha’s way to happy Mindfulness of emotion
The Halli Casser-Jayne Show explores The “F” Word, What's So Wonderful About Feeling Good? Joining the discussion on the powerlessness of positive thinking are Oliver Burkeman the author of The Antidote: Happiness for People Who Can't Stand Positive Thinking and Tina Gilbertson, author of Constructive Wallowing: How to Beat Bad Feelings by Letting Yourself Have Them. Tune in for the answers online at Halli Casser-Jayne dot com.Oliver Burkeman is a British journalist for the British newspaper The Guardian. He is a winner of the Foreign Press Association's Young Journalist of the Year award, and was short listed for the Orwell Prize in 2006. He writes a popular weekly column on psychology, This Column Will Change Your Life, and has reported from London, Washington and New York. He holds a degree from Christ's College, Cambridge.Tina Gilbertson holds a master's degree in Counseling Psychology and is a licensed mental health counselor. In addition to working with adults one-on-one, she teaches assertiveness and self-esteem workshops and classes on goal-setting, decision-making, overcoming anxiety and finding the right career. She has written feature articles on emotional intelligence and health for Portland's Natural Awakenings magazine. She contributes wisdom as a self-esteem expert for online therapist directory GoodTherapy.org.A conversation about The “F” Word: What's So Wonderful About Feeling Good and the powerlessness of positive thinking with Oliver Burkeman and Tina Gilbertson on The Halli Casser-Jayne Show.For more information visit http://bit.ly/hcjblog.
Podcast 473: Constructive Wallowing with Tina Gilbertson by Greg Voisen
Tina Gilbertson, shares how to beat bad feelings by yourself have them. In her book, Constructive Wallowing, she highlights the T-R-U-T-H about connecting with feelings and letting the critical gremlin within have a day off while essential and “constructive” healing takes place. Although not a new idea, Gilbertson’s spin on this mental health technique is refreshing, thorough, and straight-forward. The results are the end of an “internal war” with old wounds and new found energy to enjoy true bliss. Tina Gilbertson is a mental health counselor who teaches assertiveness and self-esteem workshops on goal-setting, decision-making, overcoming anxiety and finding the right career. You can find her articles in Natuaral Awakenings Magazine and GoddTherapy.org. Tina’s website is: www.tinagilbertson.com
On June 29 Eagle Harbor Books will host Tina Gilbertson, author of Constructive Wallowing: How to Beat Bad Feelings By Letting Yourself Have Them. The event will begin at 3pm in the back room of the book store, which is located at 157 Winslow Way, Bainbridge Island. Gilbertson, whose book offers helpful guidelines on how to practice loving kindness and self compassion, is a former actress and now a practicing psychotherapist in Portland, Oregon. In this interview with Victoria Irwin, the bookstore events coordinator, we learn that Gilbertson's book is very reader-friendly, with work sheets and quotes by notable personalities. Victoria also reads from one of the book's essays, a memorable piece by author/anthropologist, Zora Neale Hurston. Ms. Hurston, like Gilbertson, urges readers to embrace every aspect of ourselves, even including questionable behaviors. According to Gilbertson, most people heal and grow in the presence of compassion, caring and understanding. Those who are familiar with Buddhism and/or other meditation practices may already be aware of this principle. But even if you're not inclined to embrace Eastern philosophies Victoria believes listening to Gilbertson can help reduce destructive self-criticism. The well informed staff at Eagle Harbor Books can also help you identify other books in this genre. Call 206-842-5332 or visit their website at http://www.eagleharborbooks.com. For more information about Tina Gilbertson go to http://www.goodtherapy.org/tina-gilbertson-therapist.php . Credits: BCB Host: Barbara Golden; Audio Editor Tim Bird; BCB ferry music: Dogfish Bay Studios; music splash: Dave Bristow.
This week on Therapy Chat we are revisiting a conversation from a few years ago that will feel timely to many of us as we move through the holiday season. Whether you are a parent or an adult child, the holidays - which are supposed to be a time of family togetherness - can often feel very stressful. This week's guest is Tina Gilbertson. She specializes in supporting parents who are estranged from their adult children, and not by choice. Tina Gilbertson is a psychotherapist and author of Reconnecting with Your Estranged Adult Child.Her work has been featured in Forbes, Fast Company, Glamour, Real Simple and Redbook. In 2019,Tina cofounded www.ReconnectionClub.com, offering education, community, and support to help estranged parents repair their relationships with their adult children. Originally from Vancouver, B.C., Canada, she now lives in Denver, CO. Find out more about her work at www.TinaGilbertson.com.We are accepting new clients in my therapy practice (for those located in Maryland). Learn more via our website: https://bahealing.com Find a trauma therapist near you via https://traumatherapistnetwork.com ! We believe that trauma is real, healing is possible and help is available. Dr. Janina Fisher has a new course coming up through the Academy of Therapy Wisdom. This time she's focusing on addiction and trauma. Learn more and register for a free webinar here!My friend (and prior podcast guest) Deirdre Fay, MSW, has a new course on one of the most challenging aspects of healing after trauma: shame. Shame is that deep sense of being broken, unlovable, worthless that "just talking" can't relieve. Learn about Deirdre's new course and register through Academy of Therapy Wisdom here!My friend Dr. Jamie+ Marich's free webinar recording and link to learn about their course are found here: Not Faking: Dispelling the Myths & Misunderstandings Of DissociationJamie+ also has a new course on Trauma & the 12 Steps. Click the link to learn more and register!Thank you to TherapyNotes for sponsoring this week's episode! TherapyNotes makes billing, scheduling,notetaking, and telehealth incredibly easy. And now, for all you prescribers out there, TherapyNotes is proudly introducing E-prescribe!Try it today with no strings attached, and see why everyone is switching toTherapyNotes, now featuring E-prescribe! Use promo code "chat" at www.therapynotes.com to receive 2 FREE months of TherapyNotes!!Find my most frequently recommended resources for learning about trauma here - includes recommended books and trainings.Get my free PDF 5 Common Mistakes People Make When Searching For A Trauma Therapist here!Love Therapy Chat? Leave a rating and review, and subscribe where you listen to your podcasts! Thank you!Podcast produced by Pete Bailey - https://petebailey.net/audioAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy