Podcasts about living joyfully

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Best podcasts about living joyfully

Latest podcast episodes about living joyfully

Making Footprints Not Blueprints
S08 #13 - Norbert Fabián Čapek's “Ten Principles of Living” - A thought for the day

Making Footprints Not Blueprints

Play Episode Listen Later Nov 30, 2024 13:16 Transcription Available


Send us a textThe full text of this podcast, including the links mentioned, can be found in the transcript of this edition or at the following link:https://andrewjbrown.blogspot.com/2024/11/norbert-fabian-capeks-ten-principles-of.htmlPlease feel free to post any comments you have about this episode there.The page about the translation of Norbert Fabián Čapek's "Toward the Sunny Shore:  A Guide to Living Joyfully" can be found at this link:https://andrewjbrown.blogspot.com/2024/11/a-project-to-translate-norbert-fabian.htmlThe Cambridge Unitarian Church's Sunday Service of Mindful Meditation can be found at this link:https://www.cambridgeunitarian.org/morning-service/ Music, "New Heaven", written by Andrew J. Brown and played by Chris Ingham (piano), Paul Higgs (trumpet), Russ Morgan (drums) and Andrew J. Brown (double bass) Thanks for listening. Just to note that the texts of all these podcasts are available on my blog. You'll also find there a brief biography, info about my career as a musician, & some photography. Feel free to drop by & say hello. Email: caute.brown[at]gmail.com

LIBERTY Sessions with Nada Jones | Celebrating women who do & inspiring women who can |

Kelley Wolf is a best-selling author of FLOW Finding Love Over Worry, an Executive Coach, and a speaker. Kelley's newly launched exclusive coaching program, The Cricket Project, accepts only five clients each year. It is the culmination of her extensive 15-year career. This program is designed for individuals ready to make profound life changes, offering unparalleled personalized guidance and like no other "growth" opportunity in the helping fields. Kelley has been featured on the Today Show, Variety, and the LA Times. Outside her professional life, Kelley is a devoted mother to three children, all under the age of 15, and wife to actor Scott Wolf. Kelley holds advanced degrees in Clinical Psychology and numerous coaching certifications.In this episode, Nada sits down with Kelley to discuss how her degrees in broadcast journalism and clinical psychology revealed a love for listening to and learning from other people's life stories, ultimately leading her to the coaching field. She shares the foundational pillars of her FLOW method and how they lead to living a more peaceful life in these highly anxious times. Using brilliant yet straightforward metaphors and some playful and quirky Kelley-isms, she helps us get curious and ask the "whys" under what animates us. To delve deeper into the FLOW method and Kelley's coaching services, visit her website. Check out her book, FLOW Finding Love Over Worry: A Recipe for Living Joyfully. For more insights and updates, follow Kelley on Instagram: @kelleywolf. We look forward to connecting with you there!Please follow us at @thisislibertyroad on Instagram; we want to share and connect with you and hear your thoughts and comments. Please rate and review this podcast. It helps to know if these conversations inspire and equip you to consider your possibilities and lean into your future with intention. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

make joy normal:  cozy homeschooling
living joyfully when it's hard

make joy normal: cozy homeschooling

Play Episode Listen Later Oct 12, 2024 23:34


send us a text via Fan Mail!a few thoughts on personal growth and acceptance of God's will through joy and suffering 1:37 - Can we find joy in suffering? 5:25 - Being angry with God and accepting what is 13:54 - Facing tragedy by God's grace 17:53 - Compliance to our circumstancesperseverance in homeschooling: remembering what matters (podcast)revelations (blog post) Support the showContact On Instagram at @make.joy.normal By email at makejoynormal@gmail.com Search podcast episodes by topic Thanks for listening to Make Joy Normal Podcast!

Just Breathing Podcast
How to DISCOVER God's PURPOSE for Your Life – 3 "EASY" Steps! | Just Breathing #65

Just Breathing Podcast

Play Episode Listen Later Sep 19, 2024 53:57


In this episode of Just Breathing, we dive deep into discovering God's will for your life through the wisdom of 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18. This powerful Bible passage calls us to live joyfully, lean on God in every circumstance, and cultivate a heart of gratitude. We explore how these principles—joy, dependence on God, and thankfulness—serve as the foundation for aligning with God's plan and developing your life!Support the showThanks for tuning in to Just Breathing! We hope you enjoyed this episode as much as we did. If you have thoughts to share, stories to tell, or topics you'd like us to explore in future episodes, we'd love to hear from you. Connect with us on social media @jcandbritt or drop us an email at laudandlungs@gmail.com. Don't forget to subscribe, rate, and leave a review if you liked what you heard. Until next time, keep breathing!

Haven Baptist Church: Sermon Audio
Living Joyfully in a Grumpy World (John 15:9-17)

Haven Baptist Church: Sermon Audio

Play Episode Listen Later Jul 16, 2024


Living Joyfully in a Grumpy WorldSunday Morning Worship, July 14, 2024 Guest Speaker: Harold Fanning

Relationship 411 Podcast
Living Joyfully Beyond Betrayal

Relationship 411 Podcast

Play Episode Listen Later Jun 24, 2024 17:48 Transcription Available


Feeling trapped in the aftermath of betrayal can leave you paralyzed, stuck in cycles of fight, flight, or freeze. Ever wondered why it's so hard to move forward? Join me, Life Coach Jen, as I share my personal journey and dive deep into how our nervous system can keep us from breaking free. By becoming aware of these feelings, identifying our triggers, and taking responsibility for our part in the scenario, we can begin to practice self-forgiveness and cultivate presence. Together, we'll explore ways to break free from autopilot mode, creating a healthier and more fulfilling future.In the second half of the episode, we discuss the transformative power of connection. Discover how reaching out can lead to personal growth and lasting happiness, even after experiencing hardship. I'll share actionable insights on living happily ever after and invite you to join me for a free consultation call through lifecoachjen.com. Stay connected by signing up for my email updates at hello@lifecoachjen.com and following me on Instagram and Facebook at Happily Even After Coach. Let's build a joyful life together, despite past betrayals, and find new paths to happiness and personal fulfillment.Please follow me on instagram and facebook @happilyevenaftercoach and if you want to see what coaching is all about I offer a free 30 min. clarity call via zoom. Email me: hello@lifecoachjen.com for any comments or questions. Thanks for listening, please like and review as well as share with your family and friends. My website is www.lifecoachjen.com

Daily Energize
Living Joyfully

Daily Energize

Play Episode Listen Later Jun 5, 2024 6:01


Today's episode is about Living Joyfully. So, joy and happiness are two different things. Let's be upfront and clear about that. Happiness for me is more short term, it's kind of fleeting, it's based on certain things. 

On Purpose
Living Joyfully w/ Lisa McCourt

On Purpose

Play Episode Listen Later Apr 23, 2024 37:23


Tune into this week's episode of On Purpose for a conversation with Lisa McCourt, bestselling author (of over 9 million copies) and creator of Joy School. Whether you're starting out on your path to purpose, or have been a seeker for many years, this is a must-listen conversation about freeing the joy that lives inside each of us. Connect with Lisa McCourt at her Website. Follow Janice on Facebook and InstagramEmail Janice: stopdiets@aol.comJanice's Website: http://stopdiets.comIf you enjoy the podcast, please leave a positive rating and review!

The Infinite Capacity Podcast
Busy Living (Joyfully!) Sober, Featuring Elizabeth Chance

The Infinite Capacity Podcast

Play Episode Play 60 sec Highlight Listen Later Jan 30, 2024 64:23


Elizabeth Chance (aka Bizzy) is one of the warmest, most personable people you could be lucky enough to meet!  As a Mom of three adult children and two dogs, a successful podcaster, a health & wellness coach, and a wife, she leads a full and vibrant life.Yet, what you might not guess is that Elizabeth's path to becoming all of these amazing things started with addiction, divorce, and emotional pain.Elizabeth is now 17 years sober and her journey to the happy, healthy life she leads today is an enthralling and deeply meaningful story.You'll hear how (and when) Elizabeth started drinking, how fun partying evolved into an addiction, and how it impacted her relationships. You'll also learn when she realized it was a problem, how she finally stopped, and what's helped her to stay “Sober Not Ashamed!” ever since.Whether or not you've had personal experience with alcoholism, it's guaranteed that you will connect with Elizabeth's honesty, vulnerability, zest for life, and spunky sense of humor!  Her story is very touching.I guarantee you'll love listening to this episode of The Infinite Capacity Podcast, and likely learn a lot about addiction and sobriety along the way!  (If you know someone who is struggling with alcohol dependence, please consider passing this episode along.)To learn more about Elizabeth Chance, please visit her official website: https://elizabethchance.com/Need some coaching feedback about your own life? Ask Andrea your question by emailing andrea@thinktothrivecoaching.com!You can also reach out via Instagram, Facebook and LinkedIn @thinktothrivecoaching

Exploring Unschooling
Podcast Update, Nov 2023

Exploring Unschooling

Play Episode Listen Later Nov 27, 2023 4:33


Quick Links Check out the Black Friday-inspired bundle specials on the newly refreshed Living Joyfully Shop! Transcript Hello, everyone! I'm Pam Laricchia from Living Joyfully and I'm popping in to share a couple of bits of news with you. First is the Black Friday-inspired sale happening in the Living Joyfully Shop right now! It runs […]

Your Anxiety Toolkit
When OCD and PTSD Collide (with Shala Nicely & Caitlin Pinciotti) | Ep. 362

Your Anxiety Toolkit

Play Episode Listen Later Nov 17, 2023 42:52


Kimberley: Welcome, everybody. This is a very exciting episode. I know I'm going to learn so much. Today, we have Caitlin Pinciotti and Shala Nicely, and we're talking about when OCD and PTSD collide and intertwine and how that plays out. This is actually a topic I think we need to talk about more. Welcome, Caitlin, and welcome, Shala. Caitlin: Thank you. Shala: Thanks. Kimberley: Okay. Let's first do a little introduction. Caitlin, would you like to go first introducing yourself? Caitlin: Sure thing. I'm Caitlin Pinciotti. I'm a licensed clinical psychologist and an assistant professor in the Department of Psychiatry and Behavioral Sciences at Baylor College of Medicine. I also serve as a co-chair for the IOCDF Trauma and PTSD and OCD SIG. If people are interested in that special interest group as well, that's something that's available and up and running now. Most of my research specifically focuses on OCD, trauma, and PTSD, and particularly the overlap of these things. That's been sort of my focus for the last several years. I'm excited to be here and talk more about this topic. Kimberley: Thank you. You're doing amazing work. I've loved being a part of just watching all of this great research that you're doing. Shala, would you like to introduce yourself? Shala: Yes. I'm Shala Nicely. I am a licensed professional counselor, and I specialize in the treatment of OCD and related disorders. I am the author of Is Fred in the Refrigerator?: Taming OCD and Reclaiming My Life, which is my story, and then co-author with Jon Hershfield of Everyday Mindfulness for OCD: Tips, Tricks, and Skills for Living Joyfully. I also produce the Shoulders Back! newsletter. It has tips and resources for taming OCD. Kimberley: Shoulders Back! was actually the inspiration for this episode. Shala, you recently wrote an article about post-traumatic OCD or how PTSD and OCD collide. Can you tell us about your story, particularly going back to, I think you mentioned, May 2020, and what brought you to write that article? Shala: Sure, and thank you very much for having Caitlin and me on today because I really appreciate the opportunity to talk about this and to get more information out in the world about this intertwined combination of PTSD and OCD. In May of 2020, I moved to a new house, the house that I'm in now. Of course, we had just started the pandemic, and so everybody was working at home, including me. The house that I moved into was in a brand new neighborhood. While the houses on this side of me were completed, the houses behind me and on that side were not completed. I didn't think anything of that when I moved in. But what I moved into was a situation where I was in a construction zone all the time. I was working at home, so there was no escape from it. One day I was walking behind my house, where most of the houses were in the process of being built and there were no sidewalks. As I was walking down the street, I saw, down at the end of the street, a big forklift come down the street where I was walking with my two little dogs backwards at a really high rate of speed, and the forklift driver seemed to be looking that way, and he was going that way. It happened so fast because he was going so quickly that all of a sudden I realized he was going to hit us, my dogs and me, and there was no place for us to go because we were on the road because there was nowhere else for us to be. I screamed bloody murder, and he heard me. I mean, that's how loud I screamed, and he stopped. That was not all that pleasant. I was upset. He was not happy. But we moved on. But my brain didn't move on.  After that incident, what I noticed was I was becoming really hypervigilant in my own house and finding the construction equipment. If I go outside, I tense up just knowing that construction equipment is there. Over time, my sleep started becoming disturbed. I started to have flashbacks and what I call flash-forwards, where I would think about all these horrible things that could happen to me that hadn't happened to me yet but could. I'd get lost in these violent fantasies of what might happen and what I need to do to prevent that.  I realized that I seemed to be developing symptoms of PTSD. This is where being a therapist was actually quite helpful because I pulled the DSM open one night and I started going through symptoms of PTSD. I'm like, “Oh my gosh, I think I have PTSD.”  I think what happened, because having a forklift driver almost hit you, doesn't seem like that could possibly cause PTSD. But if you look at my history, I think that created a link in my brain to an accident I was in when I was four where I did almost die, which is when my mom and I were standing on the side of a road, about to cross. We were going to go between two parked cars. My mom and I stepped between two parked cars, and there was a man driving down the road who was legally blind, and he mistook the line of parked cars where we were standing as moving traffic. He plowed into the end of all the parked cars, which of course made them accordion in, and my mom and I were in the middle of that. I was very seriously injured and probably almost died. My mom was, too. Several months in the hospital, all of that.  Of course, at that point—that was 1975—there was no PTSD, because I think— Caitlin, you can correct me—it didn't become a diagnosis until 1980. I have had symptoms—small, low-level symptoms of PTSD probably on and off most of my life, but so low-level, not diagnosable, and not really causing any sort of problems. But I think what happened in my head was that when that forklift almost hit me, it made my brain think, “Oh my gosh, we're in that situation again,” because the forklift was huge. It was the same scale to me as an adult as that car that I was crushed between was when I was four. I think my brain just got confused. Because I was stuck with this construction equipment all day long and I didn't get any break from it, it just made my brain think more and more and more, “Boy, we are really in danger.” Our lives are basically threatened all the time.  That began my journey of figuring out what was going on with me and then also trying to understand why my OCD seemed to be getting worse and jumping in to help because I seemed to get all these compulsions that were designed to keep me safe from this construction equipment. It created a process where I was trying to figure out, "What is this? I've got both PTSD now, I've got OCD flaring up, how do I deal with this? What do I do?" The reason why I wanted to write the article for Shoulders Back! and why I asked Caitlin to write it with me was because there just isn't a lot of information out there about this combination where people have PTSD or some sort of trauma, and then the OCD jumps in to help. Now you've got a combination of disorders where you've got trauma or PTSD and OCD, and they're merging together to try to protect you. That's what they think they're doing. They're trying to help you stay safe, but really, what they're doing is they're making your life smaller and smaller and smaller.  I wanted to write this article for Shoulders Back! to let people know about my experience so that other people going through this aren't alone. I wanted to ask Caitlin to write it with me because I wanted an expert in this to talk about what it is, how we treat it, what hope do we have for people who are experiencing this going forward. THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN OCD AND PTSD (AND POST-TRAUMATIC OCD)  Kimberley: Thank you for sharing that. I do encourage people; I'll link in the show notes if they want to go and read the article as well. Caitlin, from a clinical perspective, what was going on for Shala? Can you break down the differences between OCD and PTSD and what's happening to her? Caitlin: Sure. First, I want to start by thanking Shala again for sharing that story. I know you and I talked about this one-on-one, but I think really sharing personal stories like that obviously involves a lot of courage and vulnerability. It's just so helpful for people to hear examples and to really resonate with, “Wow, maybe I'm not so different or so alone. I thought I was the only one who had experiences like this.” I just want to publicly thank you again for writing that blog and being willing to share these really horrible experiences that you had.  In terms of how we would look at this clinically, it's not uncommon for people to, like Shala described, experience trauma and have these low-level symptoms for a while that don't really emerge or don't really reach the threshold of being diagnosable. This can happen, for example, with veterans who return home from war, and it might not be until decades later that they have some sort of significant life event or change. Maybe they've retired, or they're experiencing more stress, or maybe, like Shala, they're experiencing another trauma, and it just brings everything up. This kind of delayed onset of PTSD is, for sure, not abnormal.  In this case, it sounds like, just like Shala described, that her OCD really latched onto the trauma, that she had these experiences that reinforced each other. Right now, I've had two experiences where being around moving vehicles has been really dangerous for me. Just like you said, I think you did such a beautiful job of saying that the OCD and PTSD colluded in a way to keep you “safe.” That's the function of it. But of course, we know that those things go to the extreme and can make our lives very small and very distressing.  What Shala described about using these compulsions to try to prevent future trauma is something that we see a lot in people who have comorbid OCD and PTSD. We're doing some research now on the different ways that OCD and trauma can intersect. And that's something that keeps coming up as people say, “I engaged in these compulsions as a way to try to prevent the trauma from happening to me again or happening to someone else. Or maybe my compulsions gave me a sense of control, predictability, or certainty about something related to the trauma.” This kind of presentation of OCD sort of functioning as protection against trauma or coping with past trauma as well is really common. STATISTICS OF OCD AND PTSD Kimberley: Would you share a little bit about the statistics between OCD and PTSD and the overlap? Caitlin: Absolutely. I'm excited to share this too, because so much of this work is so recent, and I'm hopeful that it's really going to transform the way that we see the relationships between OCD and PTSD. We know that around 60% of people who have comorbid OCD and PTSD tend to have an experience where PTSD comes first or at the same time, and the OCD comes later. This is sort of that post-traumatic OCD presentation that we're talking about and that Shala talked about in her article.  For folks who have this presentation where the PTSD comes first and then the OCD comes along afterwards, unfortunately, we see that those folks tend to have more severe obsessions, more severe compulsions. They're more likely to struggle with suicidality or to have comorbid agoraphobia or panic disorders. Generally speaking, we see a more severe presentation when the OCD comes after the PTSD and trauma, which is likely indicative of what we're discussing, which is that when the OCD develops as a way to cope with trauma, it takes on a mind of its own and can be really severe because it's serving multiple functions in that way. What we've been finding in our recent research—and if folks want to participate, the study will still be active for the next month; we're going to end it at the end of the year, the OCD and Trauma Overlap Study—what we're finding is that of the folks who've participated in the study, 85% of them feel like there's some sort of overlap between their OCD and trauma. Of course, there are lots of different ways that OCD and trauma can overlap.  I published a paper previously where we found that about 45% of people with severe OCD in a residential program felt that a traumatic or stressful event was the direct cause of their OCD on setting. But beyond that, we know that OCD and trauma can intersect in terms of the content of obsessions, the function of compulsions, as we've been talking about here, core fears. Some folks describe this, and Shala described this to this, like cyclical relationship where when one thing gets triggered, the other thing gets triggered too.  This is really where a lot of the research is focusing on now, is how do these things intersect, how often do they intersect, and what does that really look like for people? Kimberley: Thanks. I found in my practice, for people who have had a traumatic event, as exactly what happened to Shala, and I actually would love for both of you maybe to give some other examples of how this looks for people and how it may be experienced, is let's say the person that was involved in the traumatic event or that place that the traumatic event was recent that recently was revisited just like Shala. Some of them go to doing safety behaviors around that person, place, or event, or they might just notice an uptick in their compulsions that may have completely nothing to do with that. Shala, can you explain a little bit about how you differentiated between what are PTSD symptoms versus OCD, or do you consider them very, very similar? Can you give some insight into that? SYMPTOMS OF OCD & PTSD  Shala: Sure. I'll give some examples of the symptoms of OCD that developed after this PTSD developed, but it's all post-traumatic OCDs. I consider it to be different from PTSD, but it is merged with PTSD because it's only there because the PTSD is there.  For instance, I developed a lot of checking behaviors around the doors to my house—staring, touching, not able to just look once before I go to bed, had to be positively sure the doors were locked, which, as somebody who does this for a living, who helps people stop doing these compulsions, created a decent amount of shame for me too, as I'm doing these compulsions and saying, “Why am I not taking my own advice here? Why am I getting stuck doing this?”  But my OCD thought that the construction equipment was outside; we're inside. We need to make sure it stays outside. The only way we do that is to make sure the door stays locked, which is ridiculous. It's not as if a forklift is going to drive through my front door. As typical with OCD, the compulsions don't make a lot of sense, but there's a loose link there. Another compulsion that I realized after a time was probably linked with PTSD is my people-pleasing, which I've always struggled with. In fact, Kimberley, you and I have done another podcast about people-pleasing, something I've worked really hard on over the years, but it really accelerated after this. I eventually figured out that that was a compulsion to keep people liking me so that they wouldn't attack me. That can be an OCD compulsion all by itself, but it was functioning to help the PTSD.  Those would be two examples of compulsions that could be OCD compulsions on their own, but they would not have been there had the PTSD not been there. Kimberley: Caitlin, do you want to add anything about that from symptoms or how it might look and be experienced? Caitlin: Sure, yeah. I think it's spot on that there's this element of separation that we can piece apart. This feels a little bit more like OCD; this feels a little bit more like PTSD, but ultimately they're the same thing, or it's the same behavior.  In my work, I usually try to, where I can, piece things apart clinically so that we can figure out what we should do with this particular response that you're having. When it comes to differentiating compulsions, OCD compulsions and PTSD safety behaviors, we can look towards both the presentation of the behavior as well as the function of it.  In terms of presentation, I mean, we all know what compulsions can look like. They can be very rigid. There can be a set of rules that they have to be completed with. They're often characterized by a lot of doubting, like in Shala's case, the checking that, “Well, okay, I checked, but I'm not actually sure, so let me check one more time.” Whereas in PTSD, although it's possible for that to happen, those safety behaviors, usually, it's a little bit easier to disengage from. Once I feel like I've established a sense of safety, then I feel like I can disengage from that. There doesn't tend to be kind of that like rigidity and a set of rules or magical thinking that comes along with an OCD compulsion.  In terms of the function, and this is where it gets a little bit murky with post-traumatic OCD, broadly speaking, the function of PTSD safety behaviors is to try to prevent trauma from occurring again in the future. Whereas OCD compulsions, generally speaking, are a way to obtain certainty about something or prevent some sort of feared catastrophe related to someone's obsession. But of course, when the OCD is functioning along with the PTSD to cope with trauma, to prevent future trauma, that gets a little bit murkier.  In my work, like I said, I try to piece apart, are there elements of this that we can try to resist from more of an ERP OCD standpoint? If there's a set of rules or a specific way that you're checking the door, maybe we can work on reducing some of that while still having that PTSD perspective of being a little bit more lenient about weaning off safety behaviors over time. TREATMENT FOR OCD AND PTSD Kimberley: It's a perfect segue into us talking about the treatment here. Caitlin, could you maybe share the treatment options for these conditions, specifically post-traumatic OCD, but maybe in general, all three? Caitlin: Absolutely. The APA, a few years back, reviewed all the available literature on PTSD treatments, and they created this hierarchy of the treatments that have the most evidence base and went down from there. From their review of all the research that's been done, there were four treatments that emerged as being the most effective for PTSD. That would be broadly cognitive behavioral therapy and cognitive therapy. But then there are two treatments that have been specifically created to target PTSD, and that would be prolonged exposure or PE, and cognitive processing therapy or CBT. These all fall under the umbrella of CBT treatments, but they're just a little bit more specific in their approach. And then, of course, we know of ACT and EMDR and these other treatments that folks use as well. Those fall in the second tier, where there's a lot of evidence that those work for folks as well, but that top tier has the most evidence.  These treatments can be used in combination with OCD treatments like ERP. There are different ways that folks can combine them. They can do full protocols of both. They could borrow aspects of some treatments, or they could choose to focus really on if there's a very clear primary diagnosis to treat that one first before moving on to the secondary diagnosis. TREATMENT EXAMPLES FOR POST-TRAUMATIC OCD Kimberley: Amazing. Shala, if you're comfortable, can you give some examples of what treatment looked like for you and what that was like for you both having OCD and PTOCD?  Shala: Yes, and I think to set the ground for why the combined treatment working on the PTSD and the OCD together can be so important, a couple of features of how all this was presenting for me was the shift in the focus of the uncertainty. With OCD, it's all about an intolerance of uncertainty and not knowing whether these what-ifs that OCD is getting stuck on are true or going to happen. But what I noticed when I developed PTSD and then the OCD came in to help was that the focus of the uncertainty shifted to it's not what if it's going to happen. The only what-if is when it was going to happen because something bad happening became a given.  The uncertainty shifted to only when and where that bad thing was going to happen, which meant that I had lower insight. I've always had pretty good insight into my OCD, even before I got treatment. Many people with OCD too, we know what we're doing doesn't make any sense; we just can't stop doing it. With this combined presentation, there was a part of me that was saying, “Yeah, I really do need to be staring at the door. This is really important to make sure I keep that construction equipment out.” That lowered insight is a feature of this combined presentation that I think makes the type of treatment that we do more important, because we want to address both of the drivers, both the PTSD and the OCD. The treatment that I did was in a staged process. First, I had to find a treatment provider, and Caitlin has a wonderful list of evidence-based treatment providers who can provide treatment for both on her website, which is great. I found somebody actually who ended up being on Caitlin's list and worked with that person, and she wanted to start out doing prolonged exposure, which I pushed back on a little bit. Sometimes when you're a therapist and you're being the client, it's hard not to get in the other person's chair. But I pushed back on that because I said, “Well, I don't think I need to do prolonged exposure on the original accident,” because that's what she was suggesting we do, the accident when I was four. I said, “Because I wrote a book, Is Fred in the Refrigerator? and the very first chapter is the accident,” and I talked all about the accident. She explained, “That's a little bit different than the way we would do it in prolonged exposure.” What's telling, I think, is that when I worked on the audiobook version of Fred—I was doing the narration, I was in a studio, and I had an engineer and a director; they were on one side of the glass, I'm on the other side of the glass—I had a really hard time getting through that first chapter of the book because I kept breaking down. They'd have to stop everything, and I had to get myself together, and we had to start again, and that happened over and over and over again.  Even though I had relived, so to speak, this story on paper, I guess that was the problem. I was still reliving it. That's probably the right word. Prolonged exposure is what I needed to do because I needed to be able to be in the presence of that story and have it be a story in the past and not something that I was experiencing right then.  I started with prolonged exposure. After I did that, I moved on to cognitive processing therapy because I had a lot of distorted beliefs around life and the trauma that we call “stuck points” in cognitive processing therapy that I needed to work through. There were a good 20 or so stuck-point beliefs. “If I don't treat people perfectly nicely, they're going to attack me somehow.” Things that could be related directly to the compulsions, but also just things like, “The world is dangerous. If I'm not vigilant all the time, something bad is going to happen to me.” I had to work on reframing all of those because I was living my life based on those beliefs, which was keeping the trauma going.  I recreated a new set of beliefs and then brought exposure in to work on doing exposures that helped me act as if those new beliefs were the right way to live. If my stuck point is I need to be hypervigilant because of the way something bad is going to happen to me, and I'm walking around like this, which was not an exaggeration of really how I was living my life when this was all happening—if I'm living like that, if I'm acting in a hypervigilant way, I am reinforcing these beliefs. I need to go do exposures where I can walk by a dump truck without all the hypervigilance to let all that tension go, walk by it, realize what I've learned, and walk by it again.  It was a combination of all these and making sure that I was doing these exposures, both to stop the compulsions I was doing, like the door checking, but also to start living in a different way so that I wasn't in my approach to life, reinforcing the fact that my PTSD thought the world was dangerous.  I also incorporated some DBT (dialectical behavior therapy) because what I found with this combination was I was experiencing a lot more intense emotions than I'd really ever experienced in having OCD by itself. With OCD, it was mostly just out-of-this-world anxiety, but with the combination of PTSD and OCD, there were a lot more emotional swings of all sorts of different kinds that I needed to learn and had to deal with. Part of that too was just learning how to be in the presence of these PTSD symptoms, which are very physiological. Not like OCD symptoms aren't, but they tend to be somewhat more extreme, almost panicky-like feelings. When you're in the flashbacks or flash forwards, you can feel dissociated, and you're numbing out and all of that. I'm learning to be in the presence of those symptoms without reacting negatively to them, because if I'm having some sort of feelings of hypervigilance that are coming because I'm near a piece of construction equipment and I haven't practiced my ERP (Expsoure & Response Prevention) for a while, if I react negatively and say, “Oh my gosh, I shouldn't be having these symptoms. I've done my therapy. I shouldn't be having these feelings right now,” it's just going to make it worse. Really, a lot of this work on the emotional side was learning how to just be with the feelings. If I have symptoms, because they happen every now and then—if I have symptoms, then I'm accepting them. I'm not making them worse by a negative reaction to the reaction my PTSD is having.  That was a lot of the tail end of the work, was learning how to be okay with the fact that sometimes you're going to have some PTSD symptoms, and that's okay. But overreacting to them is going to make it worse.  Kimberley: Thank you so much for sharing that. I just want to maybe clarify for those who are listening. You talked about CPT, you talked about DBT, and you also talked about prolonged exposure. In the prolonged exposure, you were exposing yourself to the dump truck? Is that correct? Shala: In the prolonged exposure, I was doing two different things. One is the story of the accident that I was in. Going back to that accident that I thought I had fully habituated to through writing my book and doing all that, I had to learn how to be in the presence of that story without reliving it while seeing it as something that happened to me, but it's not happening to me right now. That was the imaginal part of the prolonged exposure.  This is where the overlap between the disorders and the treatment can get confusing of what is part of what. You can do the in vivo exposure part of prolonged exposure. Those can also look a lot like just ERP for OCD, where we're going and we're standing beside a dump truck and dropping the hypervigilant safety behaviors because we need to be able to do that to prove to our brain we can tolerate being in this environment. It isn't a dangerous environment to stand by a jump truck. It's not what happened when I was four. Those are the two parts that we're looking at there—the imaginal exposure, which is the story, and then we've got the in vivo exposures, which are going back and being in the presence of triggers, and also from an OCD perspective without compulsive safety behaviors. Kimberley: Amazing. What I would clarify, but please any of you jump in just for the listeners, if this is all new to you, what we're not saying is, let's say if there was someone who was abusive to you as a child, that you would then expose yourself to them for the sake of getting better from your PTSD. I think the decisions you made on what to expose yourself were done with a therapist, Shala? They helped you make those decisions based on what was helpful and effective for you? Do either of you want to speak to what we do and what we don't expose ourselves to in prolonged exposure? Caitlin: Yeah. I'm glad that you're clarifying that too, because this is a big part of PE that is actually a little bit different from ERP. When somebody has experienced trauma, when they have PTSD, their internal alarm system just goes haywire. Just like in Shala's example, anything that serves as a reminder or a trigger of the trauma, the brain just automatically interprets as this thing is dangerous; I have to get away from it.  In PE, a lot of what we're doing is helping people to recalibrate that internal alarm system so that they can better learn or relearn safe versus actual threat. When you're developing a hierarchy with someone in PE, you might have very explicit conversations about how safe is this exposure really, because we never want to put someone in a situation where they would be unsafe, such as, like you described, interacting with an abuser.  In ERP, we'd probably be less likely to go through the exposures and say, “This one's actually safe; I want you to do it,” because so much of the treatment is about tolerating uncertainty about feared outcomes. But in PE, we might have these explicit conversations. “Do other people you know do this activity or go to this place in town?” There are probably construction sites that wouldn't be safe for Shala to go to. They'd be objectively dangerous, and we'd never have her go and do things that would put her in harm's way. Kimberley: Thank you. I just wanted to clarify on that, particularly for folks who are hearing this for the first time. I'm so grateful that we're having this conversation again. I think it's going to be so eye-opening for people. Caitlin, can you share any final words for the listeners? What resources would you encourage them to listen to? Is there anything that you feel we missed in our conversation today for the listeners? Caitlin: I think, generally, I like to always leave on a note of hope. Again, I'm so grateful that Shala is here and gets to describe her experience with such vulnerability because it gives hope that you can hear about someone who was at their worst, and maybe things felt hopeless in that moment. But she was able to access the help that she needed and use the tools that she had from her own training too, which helped, and really move through this.  There isn't sort of a final point where it's like, “Okay, cool, I'm done. The trauma is never going to bother me again.” But it doesn't have to have that grip on your life any longer, and you don't need to rely on OCD to keep you safe from trauma.  There are treatments out there that work. Like it was mentioned, I have a directory of OCD and PTSD treatment providers available on my website, which is www.cmpinciotti.com that folks can access if they're looking for a therapist. If you're a therapist listening and you believe that you belong in this directory, there's a way to reach out to me through the website.  I'd also say too that if folks are willing and interested, participating in the research that's happening right now really helps us to understand OCD and PTSD better so that we can better support people. If you're interested in participating in the OCD and trauma study that I mentioned, you can email me at OCDTraumaStudy@bcm.edu. I also have another study that's more recent that will help to answer the question of how many people with OCD have experienced trauma and what are those more commonly endorsed ways that people feel that OCD and trauma intersect for them. That one's ultra-brief. It's a 10-minute really quick survey, NationalOCDSurvey@bcm.edu and I'm happy to share that anonymous link with you as well/ Kimberley: Thank you. Thank you so much. Shala, can you share any final words about your experience or what you want the listeners to hear? Shala: One thing I'd like to share is a mistake that I made as part of my recovery that I would love for other people not to make. I'd like to talk a little bit about that, because I think it could be helpful. The mistake that I made in trying to be a good client, a good therapy client, is I was micro-monitoring my recovery. “How many PTSD symptoms am I having? Well, I'm still having symptoms.” I woke up in the middle of the night in a panic, or I had a bad dream, or I had a flash forward. “Why am I having this? I must not be doing things right.” And then I took it a step further and said, “It would be great if I could track the physiological markers of my PTSD so I can make sure I'm keeping them under control.” I got a piece of tracking technology that enabled me to track heart rate and heart rate variability and sleep and all this stuff. At first, it was okay, but then the technology that I was using changed their algorithm, and all of a sudden my stats weren't good anymore, and I started freaking out. “Oh my gosh, my sleep is bad. My atrophy is going down. This is bad. What am I doing?” I was trying with the best of intentions to quantify, make sure I'm doing things right, focus on recovery. But what I was doing was focusing on the remaining symptoms that were there, and I was making them worse.  What I have learned is that eventually, things got so bad—in fact, with my sleep—that I got so frustrated with the tracking technology. I said, “I'm not wearing it anymore.” That's one of the things that helped me realize what I was doing. When I stopped tracking my sleep, when I let go of all of this and said, “You know what? I'm going to have symptoms,” things got better.  I would encourage people not to overthink their recovery, not to be in their heads and wake up in the morning and ask, “How much PTSD am I having? How much OCD am I having? If I could just get rid of these last little symptoms, life would be great,” because that's just going to keep everything going.  I'll say this year, two has been a challenging one for me. I've been involved in three car accidents this year; none of them my fault. One of my neighbors, whom I don't know, called the police on me, thinking I was breaking into my own house, which meant that a whole army of police officers ended up at my house at nine o'clock at night. That's four pretty hard trauma triggers for me in 2023.  Those kinds of things are going to happen to all of us every now and then. I had a lot of symptoms. I had a lot of PTSD symptoms and a lot of OCD symptoms in the wake of those events, and that's okay. It's not that I want them to be there, but that's just my brain reacting. That's my brain trying to come to terms with what happened and how safe we are and trying to get back to a level playing field.  I think it's really important for anybody else out there who's suffering from one or the other, or both of these disorders to recognize we're going to have symptoms sometimes. Just like with OCD, you're going to have symptoms sometimes. It's okay. It's the pushing away. It's the rejecting of the symptoms. It's the shaming yourself for having the symptoms that causes the symptoms to get worse.  Really, there is an element of self-compassion for OCD here. I like having bracelets to remind me. This is the self-compassion bracelet that I've had for years that I wear. By the way, this is not the tracking technology. I'm not using tracking technology anymore. But remembering self-compassion and telling yourself, “I'm having symptoms right now, and this is really hard. I'm anxious; I feel a little bit hypervigilant, but this is part of recovery from PTOCD. Most people with PTOCD experience this at some point. So I'm going to give myself a break, give myself permission to feel what I'm feeling, recognize how much progress I've made, and, when I feel ready, do some of my therapy homework to help me move past this, but in a nonhypervigilant, nonmicro monitoring way.” As I have dropped down into acceptance of these symptoms, my symptoms have gotten a lot better. I think that's a really important takeaway. Yes, we want to work hard in our therapy, yes, we want to do the homework, but we also want to work on accepting because, in the acceptance, we learn that having these symptoms sometimes is just a part of life, and it's okay.  I would echo what Caitlin said in that you can have a ton of hope if you have these disorders, in that we have good treatment. Sometimes it takes a little bit longer than working on either one or the other, but that makes sense because you're working on two. But we have good treatment, and you can get back to living a joyful life.  Always have hope and don't give up, because sometimes it can be a long road, especially when you have a combined presentation. But you can tame both of these disorders and reclaim your life. Kimberle: You guys are so good. I'm so grateful we got to do this. I feel like it's such an important conversation, and both of you bring such wonderful expertise and lived experience. I'm so grateful. Thank you both for coming on and talking about this with me today. I'm so grateful. Shala: Thank you for having us. Caitlin: Yes, thank you. This was wonderful. Kimberley: Thank you so much, guys. RESOURCES:  The two studies CAITLIN referenced are: OCD/Trauma Overlap Study: An anonymous online survey for any adult who has ever experienced trauma, and can be accessed at https://bcmpsych.sjc1.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV_0j4ULJv3DxUaKtE or by emailing OCDTraumaStudy@bcm.edu National OCD Survey: An anonymous 10-minute online survey for any U.S. adult who has ever had OCD, and can be accessed at https://bcmpsych.sjc1.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV_9LdbaR2yrj0oV7g or by emailing NationalOCDSurvey@bcm.edu

SPD Podcast
#269 – Living Joyfully, Gratefully and Generously

SPD Podcast

Play Episode Listen Later Nov 14, 2023


Nov 14th, 2023 - Pastor Tim Westermeyer - #269 – Living Joyfully, Gratefully and Generously

LIKING the people you LOVE
Living Joyfully

LIKING the people you LOVE

Play Episode Listen Later Nov 1, 2023 22:04


This episode is the first in a mini-series about living joyfully. We'll talk about JOY as: A commandment A tool  A skill A blessing I referenced so many good talks in the episode, but the one that you simply MUST re-read is from Russell M. Nelson "Joy and Spiritual Survival."

Promise Ministries
Living Joyfully

Promise Ministries

Play Episode Listen Later Oct 16, 2023 13:57


Living JoyfullyPastor Ben BrunsOctober 15, 2023 The post Living Joyfully appeared first on Promise Ministries.

Self Directed
#32 - Pam Laricchia | Living Joyfully - Redefining Success and Parent-Child Relationships

Self Directed

Play Episode Listen Later Sep 6, 2023 71:48 Transcription Available


Explore the transformative power of unschooling with Pam Laricchia, host of the popular 'The Exploring Unschooling Podcast.' Dive into the art of fostering enriching parent-child relationships, redefining success, and experiential learning.Pam is the author of several books on Unschooling, and if you are new to the game, we suggest you read her books 'What is Unschooling`' and 'Free to Learn.' In this episode, Pam shares her journey from discovering homeschooling to becoming an unschooling advocate. She reveals how homeschooling became a lifeline when her eldest son struggled in a traditional school setting and how her family has flourished since the switch. As Pam explains, unschooling allows children to learn through their interests, experiences, and conversations, taking the pressure off parents to fit into a specific curriculum or timeline. As we explore the dynamics of unschooling, we uncover the nuances of navigating parent-child conversations. This approach involves a delicate balance between directing and engaging with children, creating a relationship built on trust where experiences can be shared and learning is supported. Our conversations with our children should be enriching, giving them context and understanding of the world around them. Pam offers insights on redefining success to be personally meaningful and supporting our children in finding their own path.

Shine Church
Come With Me - Transformed :: Living Joyfully :: DJ Smith

Shine Church

Play Episode Listen Later Sep 3, 2023 54:05


Sermons-First Unitarian Universalist Society of San Francisco

"Living Joyfully" Sunday, August 13, 10:50 am Couldn't we all use a little bit more joy in our lives from time to time? We're surrounded by supposed ways to get joy: buy this, do that, follow these three simple steps. But when we chase it, it can seem more elusive than ever. How can we keep our minds and hearts open to happiness? How might we live more joyfully? Sam King, Guest Preacher; Santana González Gómez, Worship Associate; Tommy Kesecker, Percussionist; Nancy Munn, Pianist; Ben Rudiak-Gould, Songleader Jonathan Silk, audio and video; Athena Papadakos, Flowers; Linda Messner, Head Usher

Complete Service-First Unitarian Universalist Society of San Francisco

"Living Joyfully" Sunday, August 13, 10:50 am Couldn't we all use a little bit more joy in our lives from time to time? We're surrounded by supposed ways to get joy: buy this, do that, follow these three simple steps. But when we chase it, it can seem more elusive than ever. How can we keep our minds and hearts open to happiness? How might we live more joyfully? Sam King, Guest Preacher; Santana González Gómez, Worship Associate; Tommy Kesecker, Percussionist; Nancy Munn, Pianist; Ben Rudiak-Gould, Songleader Jonathan Silk, audio and video; Athena Papadakos, Flowers; Linda Messner, Head Usher

Inside Mental Health: A Psych Central Podcast
OCD Isn't What We Think It Is

Inside Mental Health: A Psych Central Podcast

Play Episode Listen Later Aug 10, 2023 25:41


We've all seen depictions of obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) in pop culture: characters like Sheldon Cooper from “The Big Bang Theory” or Detective Adrian Monk from “Monk.” Their compulsions are portrayed as annoying, but ultimately it just makes people with OCD appear quirky. However, those depictions don't even scratch the surface of what OCD really is. Imagine being obsessed with images of violence or death or being worried that you might actually be a bad person and are doomed to hell. Often, there is nothing cute or quirky about OCD in the real world. Join us as Shala Nicely, a woman who lives with OCD, explains the truth about OCD and shares the challenges it has caused in her life. To learn more -- or read the transcript -- please visit the episode page. Our guest, Shala Nicely, LPC, is the author of Is Fred in the Refrigerator? Taming OCD and Reclaiming My Life and coauthor with Jon Hershfield, MFT of Everyday Mindfulness for OCD: Tips, Tricks & Skills for Living Joyfully. She is a counselor and cognitive behavioral therapist in metro Atlanta, specializing in the treatment of OCD & related disorders and anxiety disorders. Shala produces the Shoulders Back! Tips & Resources for Taming OCD newsletter and blogs for Psychology Today, offering an inside perspective on life with OCD. She is currently working on her third book, a murder mystery called In Neptune's Orbit, about the true price of secrets we keep from ourselves. Our host, Gabe Howard, is an award-winning writer and speaker who lives with bipolar disorder. He is the author of the popular book, "Mental Illness is an Asshole and other Observations," available from Amazon; signed copies are also available directly from the author. Gabe makes his home in the suburbs of Columbus, Ohio. He lives with his supportive wife, Kendall, and a Miniature Schnauzer dog that he never wanted, but now can't imagine life without. To book Gabe for your next event or learn more about him, please visit gabehoward.com. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Catch The Fire - Weekly Sermon Podcast (Toronto Airport)
BELONGING - Steve Long (Living Joyfully Series)

Catch The Fire - Weekly Sermon Podcast (Toronto Airport)

Play Episode Listen Later Aug 8, 2023


Living Joyfully - Part V

Catch The Fire - Weekly Sermon Podcast (Toronto Airport)
GRATITUDE - Mel Rogato (Living Joyfully Series)

Catch The Fire - Weekly Sermon Podcast (Toronto Airport)

Play Episode Listen Later Jul 19, 2023


Living Joyfully - Part II

Catch The Fire - Weekly Sermon Podcast (Toronto Airport)
IDENTITY - Murray Smith (Living Joyfully Series)

Catch The Fire - Weekly Sermon Podcast (Toronto Airport)

Play Episode Listen Later Jul 19, 2023


Living Joyfully - Part II

The Answer is Elephant
51 | Wyoh Lee-Life & love through creation

The Answer is Elephant

Play Episode Listen Later Jun 14, 2023 74:16


In this episode we talk about sex, art, creation, and self-love. My guest Wyoh Lee is a master in all of these areas. Yes, that's right we are talking about SEX. Sex is a beautiful act of creation, literally it is the creation of life, the creation of YOU! Sex is a conversation that we are having in many different ways these days. What Wyoh Lee does with her podcast Sex Stories is craft a safe space for people to share their stories, learn and grow together, and reflect on their own sex lives. As a guest of her podcast (EP 156 ) I can say that this was what I was missing in my sex life. The space to discuss, learn, and understand more about my personal sex story. Wyoh Lee is always games to talk sex. She also has many other passions and creative expressions with in her life. In this episode we get to dive into more of what makes Wyoh Lee the amazing and thrilling human that she is.    Let's Be Well Together!Host: Karla Turnerwww.KarlaTurner.caIG: @theansweriselephant & @karlaturner.holisticwellnessGuest: Wyoh Leewww.wyohlee.comIG: @wyohleeSponsored By:reFRESH Food & Drink Offering healthy lunches, smoothies, fresh juices, snacks, juice cleanses, supplements, and more!LifeCraft Change your beliefs, change your life. Be Fully Human.Disclaimer: This post contains affiliate links. If you make a purchase, I may receive a commission at no extra cost to you.

Becoming More Me
Episode 86. Living Joyfully and Thriving after Sexual Abuse with Rena Romano

Becoming More Me

Play Episode Play 15 sec Highlight Listen Later Feb 2, 2023 38:34 Transcription Available


I'm so excited to share this interview with Rena Romano.Known for her “Unique Perspective” and for being an Expert by Experience, Rena Romano is an Author, Speaker, and “Positivity Pro”. She  is a veteran of the TEDx stage and was also a featured guest on "The OPRAH WINFREY Show" where she shared her story and powerful lessons that helped her persevere during and after sexual abuse.  Her techniques for personal development, will help you thrive in business, love, and life! Rena believes "There is Always an Upside” to everything life gives us and that it's all about reframing self-limiting beliefs!Anyone who has experienced trauma of any kind (and I think that's all of us!) is going to benefit from the unique perspective and stories Rena shares in this episode!Rena's Links:Website and Free Weekly Affirmation: https://renaromano.com/TEDxTalk:https://www.ted.com/talks/rena_romano_healing_from_sexual_abuse_can_start_with_one_wordIG: https://www.instagram.com/renaromano/?hl=enTwit: https://twitter.com/RenaRomanoFB: https://web.facebook.com/RenaRomanosurthriver?_rdc=1&_rdrLI: https://www.linkedin.com/in/renaromano/With Gratitude,xo,T________________________________________________________________________________________Theresa Lear Levine empowers and provides therapeutic support to ambitious, entrepreneurial women who feel a calling to more effectively cope with and release stress, trauma, distraction and limiting beliefs so they can create a calm, clear environment for their purpose, passion, dreams and next level goals to flourish and be manifested fully.Theresa's business, Becoming More Me, helps women become more of who they want to be as they positively transform, show up for themselves and others in greater ways, reclaim and stand tall in their power, and learn to love, accept and forgive themselves in all areas of life!✨

The Power of Journaling
The Year of Living Joyfully

The Power of Journaling

Play Episode Listen Later Jan 7, 2023 9:19


Thoughts become things. It's Cause and Effect. Joy is important because it raises up your thoughts, which raises up your life. This is your year to live joyfully.

The Unschool Space
#33 Living joyfully and in relationship with our children, with Pam Laricchia in Ontario

The Unschool Space

Play Episode Listen Later Jan 3, 2023 55:22


Today, I am beyond thrilled to be chatting with Pam Laricchia. Pam lives in Ontario, Canada and has three adult children, who are now 30, 28 and 25, and I came across her website about unschooling, which is called Living Joyfully,  early on in my own journey, when I was still a little shaky. I found her so incredibly warm and reassuring. So, it was such a huge delight to be able to invite her to The Unschool Space and to have this wonderful conversation with her. Pam has written extensively about unschooling, both on her blog, and also in several published books. She also runs a podcast called Exploring Unschooling, and has just begun a new podcast called Living Joyfully. Today, we really talk about what it means to live joyfully and about how the way we live in relationship with others is at the heart of all of this. You can find Pam's work at https://livingjoyfully.caConnect with Pam on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/pamlaricchia/You can find my blog, workshop and courses at:www.esther-jones.comOr, connect with me onInstagram: @_esther.jonesFacebook:@theunschoolspace

Simply Real
Living joyfully

Simply Real

Play Episode Listen Later Dec 16, 2022 58:15


Living joyfully with emotional experiences --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/simplyreal/message

Hickman Presbyterian Church Podcast (Sermons)
Living Joyfully Matthew 11:2-19

Hickman Presbyterian Church Podcast (Sermons)

Play Episode Listen Later Dec 11, 2022 14:00


Living Joyfully Matthew 11:2-19 12/11/2022 Rev. Alan Brehm PhD Hickman Presbyterian Church

Hickman Presbyterian Church Podcast (Sermons)
Living Joyfully Matthew 11:2-19

Hickman Presbyterian Church Podcast (Sermons)

Play Episode Listen Later Dec 11, 2022 14:00


Living Joyfully Matthew 11:2-19 12/11/2022 Rev. Alan Brehm PhD Hickman Presbyterian Church

Real House Wives of the Kingdom
#56-Living Joyfully with the Neurological Disorder Dystonia- Acknowledging, grieving yet embracing disorders, disabilities and differences and counting them as Blessings? With Guest Cheyenne Raineri

Real House Wives of the Kingdom

Play Episode Listen Later Dec 2, 2022 69:08


Cheyenne began experiencing symptoms at age 6 of loosing control of her motor skills. After two Years of misdiagnosis and doctors claiming she was doing this to herself she was finally diagnosed with "Dystonia". A Neurological disorder that affects your ability to control your muscle movements. She talks about her Deep Brain Stimulation Surgery and how it helps her control her movements now. While Dystonia is degenerative she is now in her early 20's and living life to the fullest. She shares about what it was like to loose the ability to walk and talk then gain it back again. How she navigated the waters of high school and being bullied. We talk about how she met her French Husband who God has used to bless her both in marriage and adventures beyond what she ever thought possible! She Loves Jesus and is incredibly joyful and gives some real tips on living with disorders and disabilities with joy! Wether you or someone you know is living with a disability or just walking through painful things I know our conversation will give you a dose of hope! SHARE with anyone who might need a little hope and joy today! You can find and Follow Cheyenne on Instagram @cheyenne_raineri You can find the show notes on my website along with all the links to what we talked about in the show: marriedrogersneighborhood.com You can sign up HERE for a free preview and to enroll in our online Pre Marital Guidance course Follow and interact with Caroline on social platforms at: Instagram: @marriedrogersneighborhood Facebook: @marriedrogersneighborhood Twitter: @marriedrogers Clubhouse: @marriedrogers YouTube Channel: Married Rogers Neighborhood You can subscribe to receive and email newsletter keeping you informed of coming content. (We promise not to spam you) Podcast Music Composed and performed by Jamie Miller If you would like more information on Jamie's Song Writing and performing services you can ask Caroline on any of the above platforms listed for her official contact info. --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/housewivesofthekingdom/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/housewivesofthekingdom/support

The Living Joyfully Podcast
LJ006: Boundaries, Comfort Zones, and Capacity [Foundations]

The Living Joyfully Podcast

Play Episode Listen Later Nov 24, 2022 34:10


The idea of boundaries comes up pretty often in conventional circles, often through the lens of self-care, encouraging people to set boundaries with their kids, their partners, their parents, and so forth, and to stay strong in defending them.But in this week's episode, we're digging into the language of boundaries and exploring some alternative ways of communicating our needs and learning about the important people in our lives. We hope today's episode sparks some fun insights for you and we invite you to dive deeper with our Episode Questions. Join us on Instagram or YouTube to continue the conversation and share your reflections.Let's dig deep, challenge paradigms, choose connection, and live joyfully!You can follow us on Instagram or YouTube. EPISODE QUESTIONSDownload a printable PDF of this week's questions here.Sign up here to receive each weekly PDF automatically in your email inbox.Think of a boundary you hold right now with your partner or a close friend. What might be gained from having some conversations around it? Might it give them some more helpful information about you? Could it help you feel more seen and heard in the relationship? How does the idea of using comfort zones to better understand and communicate your needs land with you? How often do you operate outside of your capacity to thrive? Can you think of times that you didn't trust someone else's definition of their capacity? How did it play out? Did it impact your relationship? TRANSCRIPTPAM: Hello and welcome to the Living Joyfully podcast. We are happy you're interested in exploring relationships with us, who we are in them, out of them, and what that means for how we move through the world.And in today's episode, we are going to talk about boundaries, comfort zones, and capacity. And it may end up being a bit longer than usual, but we are really excited to have this conversation. There are some big paradigm shifts around these ideas that can really have a positive impact on your relationships.Now, our focus with this podcast is on cultivating connected, trusting, and respectful relationships with our partner, with our children, with anyone we choose to have that level of a relationship with. And we soon discover that that means deeply understanding ourselves so that we can more gracefully navigate the edges where we engage with others. So, that's really the foundation of this conversation.And to start with, let's dive into the idea of boundaries, because it comes up pretty often in conventional circles, often through the lens of self-care, encouraging individuals to set strong boundaries with their partners, for their parents, to set boundaries with their kids, and just to stay strong in defending them.And the motivation behind that idea makes a lot of sense. It's to encourage us to not be manipulated into doing things that we don't want to do. That makes a lot of sense. But the solution proposed of setting and defending boundaries can often create challenges and disconnection in our relationship. Can't it?ANNA: Yes! I just don't find the boundary language particularly helpful. So, the energy of it feels very final and it has this feeling of drawing a line in the sand and, "I'm going to defend that line to the death," and also that somehow, I'm letting myself down if I don't uphold it, which is just this double whammy coming at us.PAM: Exactly.ANNA: So, the alternative I found is to look at the moment in front of me, to be honest about where I am, what I can do in that moment, because it changes. There are things we can't anticipate about the situations we're faced with.And I think, especially with my loved ones, I want to have an energy of curiosity and connection. Standing on the other side of an intensely drawn boundary just doesn't have the same feel to me. And this could be a language thing. I'm definitely a word person and I tend to respond energetically to words. So, I look to my language to help me cultivate the energy I want to bring and the person I want to be in a situation. That's why these words are important to me and why I really love teasing apart these nuances.PAM: Yes, yes. I find it very helpful to consider my language, as well, including the language I use when thinking or talking to myself. When I use the word "boundaries," does it mean a hard stop to me? When I envision someone approaching it and approaching me, am I looking at the line or am I looking at the person?Because what a pre-drawn line doesn't do is consider the context of the moment. Am I feeling resourced and centered? Are they? How's our day been going? What does their request look like through their eyes? What does it look like through my eyes? What constraints may be at play? Can we get curious together about ways to navigate it this time?Because I think one of the things we worry about is, if I do it this time, I'll have to do it every time. "There's that boundary. I moved that boundary and now it's forever there." But that is not true. We are not giving tacit permission forever more. We're chatting with them about this particular moment and that is how we learn more about each other.ANNA: Oh my gosh. Exactly. And keeping in mind that context keeps it from feeling arbitrary to the other person involved as well. We're reacting together to the context of the situation, and that's where the learning's happening.And I do think boundaries can have a place when we're faced with toxic relationships. This can be friends or even family from our family of origin. When a relationship is harming us, when we find ourselves tied in knots thinking about it, when we see it impacting our mental health or happiness, boundaries can be a helpful step to distance ourselves enough to see the situation more clearly. Even that doesn't have to be a forever step, but it can be a self-preservation step to gain perspective and to decide if this relationship is one that will work for us going forward.But if we're choosing to spend our life with someone, I truly believe that boundary language just tends to shut down communication. It doesn't leave room for finding solutions that feel good to both parties. And I think it's important to realize that this is not about not expressing or meeting our needs, but when we do it in relationship, it looks so different.If we want to have a consensual relationship where the parties involved are heard and seen and we find agreeable solutions, standing behind a hard boundary can get in the way of that. And I've found that I can honor who I am and still be open and curious to finding solutions that feel good to everyone involved.PAM: Yes! I think that is such an important distinction. We're talking about relationships with the people in our lives with whom we want to cultivate strong, connected, and trusting relationships.So, when it comes to extended family or people at work, a boundary can be a useful tool to quickly communicate our needs to someone. But with those we want a closer and more intimate relationship with, a boundary can get in the way of that. We tend to pull that out instead of having a conversation.But it's in those conversations where we come to better understand each other, where we cultivate connections, where we build trust. That space is where relationships flourish.ANNA: Yes. And so, another thing that I've noticed, I call the pendulum. For much of our early life, we're basically subject to others in a variety of different ways. We're told what to do, how to do it, often subjugating our needs and preferences. And somewhere along the line, often in our thirties and forties, we have this awakening and we realize, "Wait a minute! My needs are important here, too!"And so, you can go into this intense period of advocating for your needs. And I think this is when the strong boundary language that we hear around really resonates with people. "Yes! This feels awesome!" But I've also seen that as we get a bit older that things soften and we realize that we don't have to defend our needs to the death, that we can honor ourselves and honor another, and that solutions are really there to be found.And I want to say very clearly that there's no right and wrong about this. There's no timeline about any of it. It's just an interesting pattern and I think it can help to be aware of it and maybe watch for it. Are we swinging way over here? Do we want to come back maybe more towards the center? See how it's feeling as we play with unpacking any baggage we have in this area.And I think pretty much all of us have some baggage in this area.PAM: Yeah, no, I do love the metaphor or the image of the pendulum, and absolutely it can be a valuable part of our journey, a helpful part, to swing right up to the very edge, because then we're gaining experience with what that feels like, and we notice the pieces that aren't working.And when we understand those kinds of patterns, it can be helpful for us, too, to help us recognize where we might be on the journey and use that information to help us just decide where we want to go next.But I do love that idea of the patterns and just paying attention, because, for me, I enjoy looking for that and seeing those bigger picture patterns of how things flow.And you mentioned the baggage that we can bring. Because, for me, as I thought about how the idea of boundaries feels for me, and thinking back to when I was first playing around with this, I realized that I grew up steep in the conventional culture of competition. So, as I started thinking about this myself, that's one of the places I went.So, when I thought about how I anticipated engaging with others in terms of boundaries, it really spiked my defensive energy. As soon as I was feeling defensive, I saw the other person, whether it was my child, partner, whoever I was engaged with, I saw them as the opposition. Like, "You're the enemy, because I need to defend this boundary. This is a win-lose situation."And time and again after having brought that energy to many a conversation, just like you were saying, I learned through experience that when I did that, especially with someone that I love, that perspective and energy just hindered our interaction. It got in the way of us moving forward.I noticed that my defensiveness raised their defensiveness, which meant that we were both less empathetic. We were just defending harder and harder. And we were each just focused on our own bits and we were only seeing it through our own lens. We listened to the other person not to hear those new bits of information that curiosity can bring and that we notice. We were listening to them so that we could find the things that we could twist in support of the position that we were defending.So, as I sat with the discomfort of these two seemingly contradictory ideas, "I need boundaries so that people don't walk all over me," and, "I want to be connected to this person," I came to see that, for me, the image of holding a boundary sparks that defensive energy, which negatively impacts my connection with my loved ones.So, even a rule or a boundary that made sense to me, what it did was shut down so much rich conversation and learning and my opportunity to learn more things about these people in my life, things that I would have never discovered if I didn't have that conversation in the first place. But those conversations didn't bubble up if it was just like, "No, you can't do that. You can't do that." ANNA: Right. And that's the thing. We're talking about a very different style of communication and problem solving, and so I hope it's clear that as we're looking at it, because we have this one side, you the zero-sum game, defend your position at all costs. That's pretty common in our culture. We see it in governments to toddlers.And then here, we're talking about listening, stating our needs, listening to someone else's needs, having those conversations, learning more about each other, moving forward together on the same team. It's so different, but it's so much more pleasant and so rich with the discoveries about each other and where we can go from there.PAM: Absolutely. And what helped encourage me to have those conversations was moving away from the idea of boundaries. And instead, I started using the idea of comfort zones. And what that shift from boundaries to comfort zones reminded me to do was to bring my sense of self. So, it's not about, "I have no boundaries now, do whatever," again. It's never about taking our needs out of the equation. It's more fully bringing our needs into the moment and into that conversation without having to draw that line in the sand.So, boundaries feel external to me while comfort zones feel internal. Comfort zones remind me to open up and lean in rather than to stand there right behind the line.ANNA: Right. And, for me, it's that line in the sand that I wanted to avoid. And with comfort zones, I just like the feel of it, because we do talk about stretching and growing our comfort zones, and I think all of my relationships have helped me do that.I think we can come into all of our relationships with some pretty rigid ideas of how things should be. And that can stem from our childhood experiences, the prevailing relationship ideas around us, what's being modeled for us. But those rigid beliefs don't take into account the actual humans that we're living with, how they see the world, what feels good to them, how they process information, what they want to accomplish and learn. And that's where the curiosity and the communication that we're talking about comes into play.I don't have to stretch my comfort zone, but I want to be open to examining it, especially if it's somehow putting a limit on someone else. And so, that's why, in general, I just prefer to look at needs. If we have a situation where we're at an impasse, if we switch the focus to the underlying needs, then we have more room to find the creative solutions that feel good to both of us. So, I like the feel of that again. It's just a totally different paradigm.PAM: It really is. And I love the way you framed that as needs. For me, that shift was that these conversations really ended up being less about the thing, the thing that we were in conflict about, and just more about the people involved, which fully included me, and that's where the needs come in.Being curious about what the person is needing or wanting to do and understanding the motivation behind that.Why is that the next step that makes the most sense to them? And why is that next step right at the edge of my comfort zone? Why is that needling at me? And when we better understand those pieces, we can better explain our perspective and needs to them, which gives them the opportunity to understand us better.And then, from there, maybe they give us more information that we didn't think of, information that addresses our need. Maybe we give them a piece of information that they missed, and together we find a different way to meet their need. There's just so much more space for people to move when you take out the competitive nature of that hard line and just start playing, just start thinking, just start sharing what your needs are, what you're wanting to accomplish, and seeing where that goes. We can be so much more creative when you take that competitive nature out, I think.ANNA: Right! Because, as humans, if we're backed into a corner, we'll defend something to the death even if we don't agree with it. It's just this reaction when someone's coming at us to start defending. But you see that very different exchange that you were just talking about. It's like, "Well, here's what I'm feeling worried about." "Oh, okay. Well, what about this then? What about that?" We're working together to try to make both of us feel comfortable, both of us feel good moving forward, and it's just so different.PAM: Yeah, and I like how it feels, understanding that I'm choosing to stretch my comfort zone rather than naming it in my self-talk as, "I failed to defend my boundary." It's night and day how that feels. "I failed," or "I chose." And we can also choose to just not stretch, but we can choose to operate completely outside our comfort zone for a while. Sometimes a situation needs me to do something that in any other circumstances I would not choose to do, but this is where I am right now, and that's not a failure either.ANNA: Right. And I think relationships give us so many opportunities to do that, to stretch, but also to just step outside for a minute to take care of business. But I always want to ground myself in the choice. And you mentioned it before.So, I'm not great at parties. Again, this is a well-known fact. If David wants to go to a party with his friends, it will no doubt stretch my comfort zone. But instead of feeling pressured or as if I need to set a boundary around it, I can first ground myself in the fact that I always have a choice. And then I can also feel that choice and I can bring into play my whys.In this case, I want to support him. He thinks it'll be a fun night. And so, with some further conversation, we can figure out a way for it to feel good to us both. Maybe for me, that's knowing where it will be, who will be there, how long will we need to stay. Should I drive separately? If that doesn't feel good, can we agree not to stay too late?That conversation helps us learn more about each other. He's learning what my concerns are, also what my tender areas are, and I'm learning why it's important to him and what parts he's looking forward to and why he wants to go in the first place. And if I just shut that down summarily, "I don't go to parties, I don't like them," we'd miss this chance to dig into that and to find something that feels good to both of us.PAM: Yes. And that is the beauty of comfort zones for me versus boundaries. It encourages me to actually pay attention to the moment, to the context of the moment, versus, this is my line. This is always my line.Conversations are so much richer and our relationship connections are strengthened, not strained. I love that piece. When we have that boundary, "I don't go to parties," that's just what we pull out. But remembering my why, and everybody's why, I can support the why and the joy and all those pieces.And there are times when I'm feeling resourced, when I'm just in a great place and I can stretch my comfort zone a bit and we can enjoy this thing together. Maybe we're not enjoying the same pieces, but we can jigger things around so that there are also pieces that work for me. That's so much richer and there's just so many more experiences in our lives, like not literally having to do things, but our worlds are bigger when we know more about each other, when we can navigate those pieces.Okay, so there's one more aspect that we wanted to explore, and that's the idea of capacity. I feel it fits so beautifully with this conversation of boundaries and comfort zones, because sometimes we do have a pretty hard limit on what we can physically or emotionally take on in a particular moment, and it can feel a bit more definitive than a comfort zone.So, for example, having a migraine or being very tired can definitely impact our ability to engage. So, even if we're not able to stretch right now, I think the idea of capacity just feels more informative and less confrontational. It feels more supportive of the conversations that we're talking about than a boundary or a limit, or, "I can't do this."It quickly communicates to ourselves and to the others involved in the conversation what we are feeling that we are and aren't able to take on in this moment. It's more information about us, again. And capacity can be a great lens to use for us to check in with ourselves and just really feel what's up.If our first reaction is, "Oh my god, no! I don't want to go to a party!" Oh, where did that really strong reaction come from? Oh, maybe my capacity's really low and I need to do something to address that. ANNA: Oh my gosh. Yes. Capacity just feels so much more descriptive to me and it's much more about the moment that we're in, because my capacity at the end of a long day is very different from my capacity in the morning. And there can be so many things at play that come into this piece of capacity. Sleep, money, time, illness, all of these different factors.But what I want to do with all exchanges with the people I love is to keep us on the same side. They aren't trying to thwart me or harm me. We're all just trying to get our needs met. And as we keep those lines of communication open, we build trust in each other to work together to help meet all of our needs.And another idea that a friend introduced to me related to capacity is that we can operate within our capacity and survive, but we might not be able to thrive. So, we're kind of on the edge of our capacity and we can physically get it done, but it might be taking an emotional toll or even a physical toll, so that when we keep choice in that equation, we can choose to operate within our capacity to thrive. We can communicate that to the people in our lives and help them do the same.So, I can honor who I am and still support my partner or child, and they can honor who they are and still consider those around them. It's really important to me to honor someone else's comfort zone or their personal definition of capacity, even if I don't understand it or I think they could do more.This, again, comes into play with our partners and our children. Our honoring of this helps them develop a strong sense of what works for them and their why. I want to trust their process and that they will stretch when it feels right to them. And so, maybe it's helpful next time we bump up against someone when we think they could do a bit more than maybe they are, is to consider that maybe they're operating within their capacity to thrive, not their capacity to survive. And wouldn't it be beautiful if we could all stay in that thriving zone as much as possible?Because there are going to absolutely be times where we are pushed way outside of it to deal with an emergency or because something has happened around us that we can't control. But what if, when we see our loved one not doing something that we think they could, we give them that generous assumption that it's really just them knowing themselves, knowing that whatever it is may push them over an edge that is into survival mode versus thriving. I just love that framing of it as we look at another person and maybe, hopefully it stops the judgment.PAM: Oh yes. I love looking at things through their eyes, which we had talked about earlier. And even when we don't understand why they're making the choices they're making, remembering that we don't need to, that it is making sense to them, even if we think that they should be able to do X, Y, or Z.It doesn't matter. What matters and what's interesting, that's where my curiosity goes, is, "Ooh. That's feeling really good to them." And remembering that their choices really aren't about me. They are not trying to piss me off with this choice. There is some reason for them.So, I love that distinction between thriving and surviving. Because when we honor those choices, it just gives us another piece of the picture of who they are and understanding that there can be so many reasons why for them. Capacity can be a reason why they aren't up for it or don't want to stretch or do the thing that you know that they are capable of doing sometimes.And it's especially helpful to question the boundaries that are handed to us by society. One that we see held up often in conventional culture is, "I'm not going to do something for someone else that they can do for themselves." Oh my gosh. "They need to learn how to take care of themselves." You see it more often with children, but absolutely you see it with adults, too, that if we do it for them, we are being taken advantage of.ANNA: But really, we're just missing these opportunities to deepen that relationship. And then what I've seen, and I know you've seen it, too, is that when I'm feeling out of sorts and I'm just not wanting to get my own water or whatever it is, both my partner and my kids were happy to bring it over to me because that's the relationship that we cultivated.I don't want to die on a hill of, "I'm not going to do something for you, because you can do it for yourself." I do things for people all the time that they can absolutely do for themselves. I do it from a place of love and because it's within my capacity. And when it's not, I know they've got my back. And these skills are critical in all relationships, understanding it's about learning to communicate more about my needs versus expecting them to understand it or stand behind this strongly-drawn boundary with no explanation. It's just more information and transparency. The more we have, the easier it is to be in relationship. And, for me, the human experience is relationships.PAM: It's relationships. I know. And when you think about it, the more information that you have, it is so often so much easier to find that path through those pieces of information. If I only have two pieces, "They want to do this," and, "I don't want them to do this," how do you find a path between the chasm of those two things?But as we share a little bit more information back and forth, we're narrowing in on the path that we can travel between those. Sometimes it takes three sentences and off we go, we've got it figured out. And sometimes it takes longer conversations, maybe over days and weeks, but we can find our way. ANNA: I mean, it's just a quick way for me to go, "Hmm. Okay. I want to turn this around a little bit. I want to look at what's happening to get us back on the same side," because even when it feels really hard, and it may take a couple weeks to figure out something that's really big that we're trying to figure out as a family or a couple, if we're both over here together working on the problem, it feels so much better than being on these separate sides with this giant decision in front of us, and we're not really communicating about what our capacity or comfort zones are or any of those pieces. And it feels isolating and tough. But when we're together, even if it takes us time, it just feels better. It's about being open about it and examining that and seeing what makes sense to you and it's so individual.PAM: Yeah, it's so individual. It's so rich. And as we talked about in an earlier episode, where do we want to spend our time? Do I want to spend my time on the same team working together? Finding a way? Because when you're working together and finding your way together, you're both invested in this path at the end of it, rather than one powering over another, convincing you to do it this way, or us convincing them to do it this way. But then there's tears at the relationship. And then we need to invest the work in, in repairs.So, for this week, we have some fun questions for you to ponder around the ideas of boundaries, comfort zones, and capacities.The first is, think of a boundary you hold right now with your partner or a close friend. What might be gained from having some conversations around it? Might it give them some more helpful information about you, help you feel more seen and heard in the relationship?I think that's another big piece. A boundary only shares that little line of information. It doesn't share all the little pieces of me that came up with that in the first place.ANNA: And can we really be understood if they don't understand those other pieces? They can still honor that boundary. And maybe that feels okay, but with a partner who I'm in love with and this is who I want to be with, that deeper understanding of why that is a rub for me would be so much more important to me than them just honoring what might feel like an arbitrary boundary to them.PAM: Exactly. Without that information, it can feel like an arbitrary boundary. And absolutely, they can still respect it, but there is a richness that's missing then that's the only piece of communication.Okay, so next, how does the idea of using comfort zones to better understand and communicate your needs land with you? Does that make sense? Maybe try that framework and that language next time and see how it unfolds. Remember, as we talked about, let's play with this. Let's see. Nothing is a forever commitment. It's like, "Oh my gosh, I'm going to try this comfort zone thing, and now I can never use any other language." No. Play with it.ANNA: We're just having fun. We're just learning things. We're just trying to learn more about ourselves.PAM: Yes, yes. Okay. Next one. How often do you operate outside of your capacity to thrive? Another great question, just to dive into that self-awareness piece. It may not be something that we communicate very often, but understanding it about ourselves, noticing how often we are stepping outside of our capacity to thrive more in survival mode. And then that also can help us understand why we're feeling tired, why we don't feel like we have a lot of energy, what kind of self-care pieces that we can bring in there. Anyway, it's a great question to start with. How often do you operate outside of your capacity to thrive?ANNA: Because I think it also impacts our relationships. So, our culture values this operating at just survival mode. And so, it's something we all fall into, schools and work and all the things that we're doing. And so, it is a really interesting question to say, "Am I able to thrive and have the relationships that I want and do the things that bring joy to me? And what can I change?" So, it's like, "Am I operating outside of that and then what would that look like?" So, I think, yeah, that's going to be really interesting.PAM: Yes. And our last one, can you think of times that you didn't trust someone else's definition of their capacity? Ooh, that's a good one. How did it play out? Did it impact your relationship? It's very curious to see what other people's lens of their capacity is. As you were saying, are they just living through the cultural expectation that we survive, we go till we drop, put it all in, we are productive to the max. Are they bringing that in? ANNA: And I want to add to this one a little bit, that sometimes when we are in that survival mode, when we are pushing, pushing, pushing, we can have resentment towards someone that's choosing differently. And that resentment may not even make a lot of sense to us, but I think when you look at it through this lens, it's like, oh, wait a minute. Do I really want to be resentful or passing judgment on someone that's actually taking care of their mental health and doing this for self-care, just because I'm running my nose to the grindstone?So, I think it's really interesting. For me, again, it's this awareness. It's like, when we name these things, we're able to distance ourselves. It doesn't feel like it's all who we are. We can go, "Okay, this is something I can examine. I can play with it. I can see how it feels." You don't have to make changes, but playing with it just gives you so much more information. And especially if you see it causing a problem in a relationship, it's very much worth your time to look at those pieces.PAM: Yeah. Oh, that's one of the reasons why we are so excited to be sharing these questions, because we are not trying to get rid of some rules or paradigms and then being prescriptive about how, now you must do it this way. No, let's play with these ideas. These are things that we've found helpful in our relationships, paradigm shifts that have helped us. There is no expectation that it will work out any particular way for anyone else, but it is so worth the time to play with it. ANNA: And especially if you're feeling pinches, because I think that's the thing, if our relationships are humming along, then we've got a good understanding. Whatever we're doing is working.But when we start to feel the pinch, when we start to feel a distance, when we have a rupture for whatever reason, using these things that we're talking about can help us really kind of zero in versus standing in a place of hurt or not really knowing how to make the repair or not knowing how to change it even if we can make the repair, because we don't know how we got there.And so, these pieces allow us to play with that and to look at it and be like, "Okay, I'm going to be more intentional about this piece for these relationships that are important to me." PAM: Yeah. And for the moving forward piece, like standing there, "I don't know how we got there," and two weeks later, "I don't know how we got there."ANNA: We're here again!PAM: Okay. Thank you so much for listening and we will see you next time. Bye.ANNA: Bye bye.

Linda's Corner: Faith, Family, and Living Joyfully
Linda's Corner - Navigating life's wins and losses with James Heppner

Linda's Corner: Faith, Family, and Living Joyfully

Play Episode Play 60 sec Highlight Listen Later Nov 22, 2022 33:53


Welcome to Linda's Corner.  In this episode James Heppner talks about navigating life's wins and losses.   James is a speaker, blogger, results coach, podcast host, and the founder and creator of Weekly Wins and Losses.  You can reach James at his website https://www.jamesheppner.com and you can join a free wins and losses session at weeklywinsandlosses.com. Some of the highlights James shares:His story of going from an ambitious entrepreneur to sinking into depressionHow blocking our emotions hurts usA turning point from hopeless depression to taking a chanceHow to get unstuck and become freeHow to embrace all of life, the wins and the lossesWhat is "a man's life simplified"?How to connect with James and participate in a free community experienceAnd morePlease share, subscribe, leave a rating and review, visit the Linda's Corner website at lindascornerpodcast.com and/or follow on youtube, facebook, instagram, and pinterest @lindascornerpodcast. Thanks!Also please visit the Hope for Healing website at hopeforhealingfoundation.org for free resources to increase happiness, build confidence and self esteem, improve relationships, manage stress, and calm feelings of depression and anxiety. 

Be Bold Begin
The Key To Purpose Is Living Joyfully: Guided Meditation - ABUNDANCE SERIES Episode 112

Be Bold Begin

Play Episode Listen Later Oct 11, 2022 15:49


Do you invite "Joy" into your life daily? Last week we featured a guided meditation that was inspired by a book called Creating Money but before I read that book there was another book by Sanaya Roman and her spirit guide Orin that came into my life first and was very shifting for me. It was the first one I found within this series and it was during the time I was working on my Creativity Coaching certification that it found me.  The book is called Living With Joy and the title alone was interesting to me because it doesn't say “finding joy” or something similar, it's about “living with joy”. It was my very first introduction to beginning to understand that I get to live from a place of authentic purpose and that I have the answers to this equation called "happiness".  Listen as I read a little to you today from the chapter “You Can Live Joyfully” in the style of a guided relaxation.  Join me here: Unleash Academy & Community  To Unleash your power! Connect w/ YOUR message, creativity, innate gifts & other Creatives & Healers like you. Instagram:  @unleashxbarsi @thebarsi Facebook: @Unleash By Barsi Youtube: Unleash By Barsi BE BOLD & KEEP CREATING!     Music: Messier 45 - Light Years by Stelladrone This work is licensed under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike 3.0 Unported License. To view a copy of this license, visit http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/ or send a letter to Creative Commons, PO Box 1866, Mountain View, CA 94042, USA. Book Credit: Taken from Living With Joy by Sanaya Roman, a book published by H J Kramer Inc. and New World Library. Information at www.orindaben.com 

The Living Joyfully Podcast
LJ000: The Living Joyfully Podcast

The Living Joyfully Podcast

Play Episode Listen Later Oct 4, 2022


Welcome to The Living Joyfully Podcast!In this short episode, your hosts, Anna Brown and Pam Laricchia, share an introduction to the podcast and to themselves.In The Living Joyfully Podcast, we are going to talk about many of the different aspects of being in relationship with the people in our lives. Having strong, connected relationships makes everything about being human more interesting and enjoyable. Navigating relationships is rooted in things like connection, agency, compassion, understanding, and consent. These are all of which are wonderful ideas, but we want to talk about what that looks like in real life. Being in relationship with others also asks us to better understand ourselves, so we'll be diving into that aspect as well. It's such rich terrain to explore as we shed the bits from our past that no longer serve us and focus on being the person we want to be now.We will be releasing new episodes each week, including questions you can use to reflect on the topic through your unique lens.Let's dig deep, challenge paradigms, choose connection, and live joyfully!You can follow us on Instagram.TRANSCRIPTANNA: Hi, I'm Anna Brown.PAM: And I'm Pam Laricchia.ANNA: And welcome to the Living Joyfully Podcast, episode 0.Episode 0 gives us a chance to share a quick introduction to the podcast and tell you a bit about who we are before we dive into all the things we want to talk about. And there are a lot of things—we already have topics in mind for a year's worth of episodes!So, first, what can you expect from the podcast?We want to talk about many of the different aspects of being in relationship with the people in our lives. Having strong, connected relationships makes everything about being human more interesting and enjoyable. Navigating relationships is rooted in things like connection, agency, compassion, understanding, consent, all of which are wonderful ideas, but we want to talk about what that looks like in real life, what those ideas mean in practice. In our relationships with our partner, our extended family, our friends, our kids, ourselves. Being in relationship with others also asks us to better understand ourselves, so we'll be diving into that aspect as well. It's such rich terrain to explore as we shed the bits from our past that don't serve us and focus on being the person we want to be now. And we want to do all of that in bite sized bits that easily fit into your flow. So, we'll be keeping the length of each episode focused and manageable. We will be releasing new episodes weekly and giving you some questions to reflect upon related to the topic. There will be lots of fodder for conversation and growth and we look to add episodes where we dive into questions and specific situations that bubble up for listeners as well. There will be companion PDFs available to download so you can spend time with the questions and transcripts available if you are like me and like to see actual words. You can subscribe to the show in your favorite podcast player so that you won't miss an episode!And now for a quick introduction: As I mentioned, I'm Anna. David and I have been together for 36 years, married for 30. We have two grown daughters who, gratefully, still enjoy coming back to hangout with us! I worked for several years with families in crisis before turning my attention to helping parents build better relationships with their children and partners. I have been doing that amazing work for over 20 years. Currently, I work in a private practice helping couples and families move through conflicts and create an environment of collaboration and growth. I don't believe relationships have to be hard, I think they enhance our joy as we move through this life. I look forward to sharing tools and exploring all the ways we can live joyfully together. PAM: And I'm Pam. My partner and I have been married for 32 years and have three grown children. I've long been fascinated by how human beings tick and what it means to be in relationship with the people in my life. Over the last fifteen years, I've helped many people cultivate strong, connected, and trusting relationships with their children and partner while navigating the day to day challenges and conflicts of life. I'm really excited to share these ideas more widely through this podcast!And lastly, we wanted to touch on the name of the podcast. Why Living Joyfully?We'll dive into this more deeply in a future episode—and it will become more and more apparent over time through our conversations—but, in a nutshell, we've found joy to be a meaningful compass for navigating life and relationships.And by joy we don't mean the more surface-level happiness of things always going our way. That's cool and all, but life doesn't always go our way. There are ups and downs—sometimes things go sideways, or even deeply awry. There are tragedies alongside the triumphs, and there are large swathes of everyday life. Joy can be a valuable beacon in the midst of all those moments and seasons.So, that's a quick intro to the podcast and to us. We are excited to dive into all the things!!As Anna mentioned, subscribe to the show in your favorite podcast player and we look forward to sharing our first official episode with you next week.Bye for now!

Real House Wives of the Kingdom
#48- *By the Word of our Testimony* Living joyfully, healed and whole with Jesus- Breaking the Bonds of sexual abuse, abortion and substance abuse- helping others do the same -with Denise Davis

Real House Wives of the Kingdom

Play Episode Listen Later Sep 23, 2022 43:52


My new series is called "By the word of our testimony". based on the scripture below from Revelation. Today Denise is sharing her story of hope and healing. After being sexually abused as a child she became dependent at a young age on alcohol and drugs to numb the pain and blur reality. Her promiscuity lead to an unplanned pregnancy and abortion that she kept a secret for many years. She had raised her hand to accept Jesus many times but it was a head decision, not a heart one. Even after she no longer turned to substance she filled her days with busyness to mask the pain. God finally broke through and revealed His heart to her and began leading her through the steps to surrender and be healed. Today she lives joyfully and God has given her opportunities to walk others through paths of hope, healing and restoration. We don't get super graphic but I wouldn't recommend this episode for little ears. If you or anyone you know has been the victim of sexual abuse or has walked down any of the same paths as Denise, I believe you will be so encouraged. 'Now war arose in heaven, Michael and his angels fighting against the dragon. And the dragon and his angels fought back, but he was defeated, and there was no longer any place for them in heaven. And the great dragon was thrown down, that ancient serpent, who is called the devil and Satan, the deceiver of the whole world— he was thrown down to the earth, and his angels were thrown down with him. And I heard a loud voice in heaven, saying, “Now the salvation and the power and the kingdom of our God and the authority of his Christ have come, for the accuser of our brothers has been thrown down, who accuses them day and night before our God. And they have conquered him by the blood of the Lamb and by the word of their testimony, for they loved not their lives even unto death. Therefore, rejoice, O heavens and you who dwell in them! But woe to you, O earth and sea, for the devil has come down to you in great wrath, because he knows that his time is short!” ' Revelation 12:7-12 You can find the show notes on my website: marriedrogersneighborhood.com You can sign up HERE for info on our Pre Marital Guidance course *LAUNCHING ON SEPTEMBER 8 2022*, our 20th wedding anniversary! Follow and interact with Caroline on social platforms at: Instagram: @marriedrogersneighborhood Facebook: @marriedrogersneighborhood Twitter: @marriedrogers Clubhouse: @marriedrogers YouTube Channel: Married Rogers Neighborhood You can subscribe to receive and email newsletter keeping you informed of coming content. (We promise not to spam you) Podcast Music Composed and performed by Jamie Miller If you would like more information on Jamie's Song Writing and performing services you can ask Caroline on any of the above platforms listed for her official contact info. --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/housewivesofthekingdom/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/housewivesofthekingdom/support

St. TImothy on the Northshore
Living Joyfully - The Path of Humility

St. TImothy on the Northshore

Play Episode Listen Later Aug 21, 2022 36:12


Linda's Corner: Faith, Family, and Living Joyfully
Linda's Corner - Anything is possible - Gordon Stein

Linda's Corner: Faith, Family, and Living Joyfully

Play Episode Play 54 sec Highlight Listen Later Aug 18, 2022 25:56


Welcome to Linda's Corner.  In this episode, we welcome back Gordon Stein who is a living example that anything is possible.   Gordon is a personal finance expert, international keynote speaker, blogger, and the author of "Cashflow Cookbook."  He is also a musician unencumbered by talent, a non-runner who ran three marathons, and more.   Gordon helps people get over their limiting beliefs and realize that you can do what you want to do.  You can reach Gordon and learn more about his book at his website CashFlowCookbook.com.Some of the highlights Gordon sharesHow we can overcome self-limiting beliefsHow Gordon earned the nickname "Four chord Gord"The thrill of achieving a bucket-list dream of performing on stageA guitar collection that includes one that he built himselfHow to go from being a non-runner to completing three marathonsAn amazing experience guiding a visually impaired runner through a half-marathon Starting skiing lessons at age 30 and starting racing at age 45Sailboat racing as a young manCrewing a 250 mile (60 hour) Mackinac Island race in his 20'sRepeating the race years later on his own boat with his sons as part of the crewAnd morePlease share, subscribe, leave a rating and review, visit the Linda's Corner website at lindascornerpodcast.com and/or follow on youtube, facebook, instagram, and pinterest @lindascornerpodcast. Thanks!Also please visit the Hope for Healing website at hopeforhealingfoundation.org for free resources to increase happiness, build confidence and self esteem, improve relationships, manage stress, and calm feelings of depression and anxiety. 

Exploring Unschooling
EU330 Bonus Episode: A Peek Inside the Living Joyfully Network

Exploring Unschooling

Play Episode Listen Later Aug 8, 2022 35:17


I've mentioned the Living Joyfully Network online community here and there on the podcast over the last couple of years, sometimes sharing the theme we're exploring that month or testimonials from members. But I feel like that doesn't actually say much about what we get up to in this rich and vibrant community. So, for […]

Linda's Corner: Faith, Family, and Living Joyfully
Linda's Corner - How to discover and honor your highest self with Rachel Astarte

Linda's Corner: Faith, Family, and Living Joyfully

Play Episode Play 51 sec Highlight Listen Later Jul 18, 2022 33:22


Welcome to Linda's Corner.  In this episode, Rachel Astarte explains how to discover and honor your highest self.   Rachel is a licensed marriage and family therapist, transpersonal psychotherapist, life coach, speaker, poet laureate, host of the podcast, “Self Talk with Rachel Astarte” and the author of "Celebrating Solitude: How to Develop and Honor Your Highest Self."   You can reach Rachel at her website rachelastartetherapy.com.Some of the highlights Rachel shares: Her humanitarian experience in IndiaHow our problems can actually be blessings as they point us in the direction of wellnessHow to give more authentic love and acceptance to other peopleHow to learn to love and accept ourselvesIt starts with you How self-development not only benefits yourself, but also your loved ones and the rest of our human familyAnd morePlease share, subscribe, leave a rating and review, visit the Linda's Corner website at lindascornerpodcast.com and/or follow on youtube, facebook, instagram, and pinterest @lindascornerpodcast. Thanks!Also please visit the Hope for Healing website at hopeforhealingfoundation.org for free resources to increase happiness, build confidence and self esteem, improve relationships, manage stress, and calm feelings of depression and anxiety. 

Linda's Corner: Faith, Family, and Living Joyfully
Linda's Corner - How to unplug, unwind, and think clearly in the digital age with Daniel Sih

Linda's Corner: Faith, Family, and Living Joyfully

Play Episode Play 60 sec Highlight Listen Later Jul 14, 2022 32:23


Welcome to Linda's Corner.  In this episode, Daniel Sih talks about making space in our lives for the things that really matter.   Daniel is the co-founder of Spacemakers, a productivity consulting group for busy leaders.  His book “Spacemaker- how to unplug, unwind and think clearly in the digital age.”  won the Australian Business Books award for the best personal development book.  You can reach Daniel at his website   https://spacemakers.com.au.Some of the highlights Daniel shares:Loving technology and ensuring that it remains a tool rather than a taskmasterHow overuse of technology negatively affects productivityHow overuse of technology negatively affects the neuroplasticity of the brainSome practical tips to help us disconnect from our devicesHow practicing a "digital Sabbath" can help us find balance and greater joyHow social media affects children and teenagersTips for raising children in a digital ageHow creating boundaries for our technology use increases our joy and improves our relationshipsAnd morePlease share, subscribe, leave a rating and review, visit the Linda's Corner website at lindascornerpodcast.com and/or follow on youtube, facebook, instagram, and pinterest @lindascornerpodcast. Thanks!Also please visit the Hope for Healing website at hopeforhealingfoundation.org for free resources to increase happiness, build confidence and self esteem, improve relationships, manage stress, and calm feelings of depression and anxiety. 

Linda's Corner: Faith, Family, and Living Joyfully
Linda's Corner - Financial freedom with Gordon Stein

Linda's Corner: Faith, Family, and Living Joyfully

Play Episode Play 60 sec Highlight Listen Later Jun 13, 2022 27:37


Welcome to Linda's Corner.  In this episode Gordon Stein shares secrets to financial freedom.  Gordon is a personal finance expert, international keynote speaker, blogger, and the author of "Cashflow Cookbook - $2 Million of Financial Freedom in 60 Easy Recipes."  Visit Gordon's website cashflowcookbook.com for fabulous tips on how to save and invest to grow your wealth.  Some highlights Gordon shares:Why the standard advice of budgeting and saving 10% doesn't work for most peopleForget the hassle of budgetingEasy ways to free up hundreds or even thousands of dollars each monthHow to pay down debt without making sacrificesHow can average people find a path to financial freedom?How can our listeners add $1 million to their wealth?How to stop living from one paycheck to the nextHow to eliminate worries about funding your retirementand more Please share, subscribe, leave a rating and review, visit the Linda's Corner website at lindascornerpodcast.com and/or follow on youtube, facebook, instagram, and pinterest @lindascornerpodcast. Thanks!Also please visit the Hope for Healing website at hopeforhealingfoundation.org for free resources to increase happiness, build confidence and self esteem, improve relationships, manage stress, and calm feelings of depression and anxiety. 

Linda's Corner: Faith, Family, and Living Joyfully
Linda's Corner - Stretch your sense of what's possible with Rusty Gaillard

Linda's Corner: Faith, Family, and Living Joyfully

Play Episode Play 56 sec Highlight Listen Later Jun 6, 2022 29:48


Welcome to Linda's Corner.  In this episode Rusty Gaillard shares how to turn off our autopilot and live with authentic purpose.  Rusty is a worldwide director of finance, who transitioned into coaching.  He is also the author of “Breaking The Code: Stop Looking for Answers and Start Enjoying Life” available on Amazon.   Some of the highlights Rusty shares:The story behind his decision to leave a successful career at Apple to become a coachThe questions that turned his life around What stops people from making real progress in life?How to transition from autopilot to being in control of your lifeThe 2 basic reasons people choose to change (or not to change)How to stretch your sense of what's possibleHow to live with authentic purposeThe three elements necessary to enter the "zone of possibility" (quiet, heart, courage)How adults typically use their power of imagination to imagine the worstAnd more  Please share, subscribe, leave a rating and review, visit the Linda's Corner website at lindascornerpodcast.com and/or follow on youtube, facebook, instagram, and pinterest @lindascornerpodcast. Thanks!Also please visit the Hope for Healing website at hopeforhealingfoundation.org for free resources to increase happiness, build confidence and self esteem, improve relationships, manage stress, and calm feelings of depression and anxiety. 

Normal Frum Women
S2 Ep. 9 | Living Joyfully with Shaindy Plotzker

Normal Frum Women

Play Episode Listen Later May 26, 2022 67:21 Very Popular


Who doesn't want to live more joyously? On this episode of DMC, Rivki and Alex talk about what joy means to them, how they find it in their lives and how it can be hard to attain during the challenging times. Their guest for this episode is Shaindy Plotzker, singer and songwriter. Shaindy is well-known in the Jewish music world as a soulful and talented singer, but she's also well-known for her positivity and general simchas hachayim (joy for life.) Rivki and Alex sit down with Shaindy to hear about her ascent in the Jewish music industry, but also to hear her secrets about attaining and maintaining a joyous attitude in our lives.We'd love to hear from you. You can find us on social media, or email us at dmc@meaningfulinute.org. Don't forget to check out the video of this episode on Meaningful Minute's YouTube channel!

Modern Girl Podcast
Episode 116: Community Makeover, Body Acceptance, & Living Joyfully (Solo Episode)

Modern Girl Podcast

Play Episode Listen Later May 17, 2022 26:11


In this episode I share the behind-the-scenes design process for our new website, my relationship with social media right now, a new free body image resource for you, and what's on my Summer bucket list! For the full show notes, transcription, and resources that discussed in this episode, click here.

The SuperAbundant Life Podcast
141. Living Joyfully: How To Find Joy In The Present While You're Reaching For The Preferred

The SuperAbundant Life Podcast

Play Episode Listen Later Apr 24, 2022 60:48


How do you live in today's reality whilst holding on to your vision or desire of your preferred life WITHOUT becoming lost in an ocean of sadness, discouragement or even depression? In this episode, I teach a practical strategy that will help you live joyfully, regardless of your current situation. This is Olawunmi Brigue. Founder, SuperAbundant Woman (SAW): The premier spiritual and personal growth hub for Christian women who want it all - the thriving career, the loving home & the life of tremendous impact - God's way. Apply for your seat at: https://superabundantlifetribe.com/apply

Bursting With Happiness: The Podcast
Living Joyfully With Bipolar

Bursting With Happiness: The Podcast

Play Episode Listen Later Apr 11, 2022 48:23


In this episode you'll meet Sara Mathis, who feels that living with Bipolar is her "superpower." She shares what her extreme highs and lows are like, why she felt relief when she was finally diagnosed, and how she has found joy and compassion by fully accepting who she is.  As Sara says about acceptance: "Finding joy is not about changing who you are, it's about working with what you got." Check out Sara's blog at embracingmybrain.wordpress.com  (Trigger warnings: cutting and suicide.)