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Your no bullsh$t guide to divorce with experienced attorneys from New Direction Family Law and guests and professionals who have been there. Unfiltered discussions to help you move from victim to victorious and from bitter to better.

New Direction Family Law Firm


    • May 13, 2025 LATEST EPISODE
    • every other week NEW EPISODES
    • 27m AVG DURATION
    • 74 EPISODES


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    Latest episodes from Ex-it Strategy

    Estate Planning Meets Family Law: Generational Wealth & Trusts

    Play Episode Listen Later May 13, 2025 38:14


    In this insightful discussion, Cameron, the Marketing and Business Development Manager at New Direction Family Law, and Elizabeth Stevenson, a partner at the firm, dive deep into the intricate intersection of estate planning and family law with Hampton Crumpler, an attorney at NC Planning. They explore the complexities of generational wealth, trusts, wills, and how these elements play crucial roles in divorce, custody battles, and property division. Key topics include the impact of prenuptial and postnuptial agreements, protecting assets for children from previous marriages, the importance of regularly updating estate plans, and understanding the differences between revocable and irrevocable trusts. Tune in to gain valuable insights into how smart estate planning can save time, money, and stress for your family.00:00 Introduction and Guest Introduction00:57 Intersection of Estate Planning and Family Law01:34 Prenups, Postnups, and Estate Planning07:15 Trusts for Minor Children10:15 Revocable vs. Irrevocable Trusts12:26 Blended Families and Q-Tip Trusts15:12 Importance of Having a Will18:32 Inherited Property and Marital Assets21:06 Tax Consequences of Inherited Money21:30 Trusts and Taxation22:22 Real Estate and Inheritance23:47 Estate Planning and Separation Agreements25:44 Gifts and Marital Property27:09 Handling Property in Divorce28:58 Importance of Estate Planning31:53 Updating Estate Plans33:02 Legal Representation in Divorce34:49 Getting in Touch with an Estate Planning Attorney37:17 Final Thoughts on Estate Planning

    Tips for Choosing the Right Divorce Attorney

    Play Episode Listen Later May 6, 2025 20:52


    In this episode, Elizabeth Stevenson and Ashley Oldham of New Direction Family Law discuss the crucial process of selecting the right divorce attorney. They cover essential steps such as the importance of initial consultations, building a trust-based relationship, understanding retainer fees, and ensuring transparent communication. They also emphasize the value of honesty and document organization in achieving the best legal outcomes. This episode provides valuable insights for anyone navigating the complexities of divorce.00:00 Introduction and Guest Welcome00:31 Choosing the Right Attorney01:30 Initial Consultation Importance01:51 Client Intake Process04:33 Confidentiality and Trust09:40 Financial Considerations11:16 Document Organization15:37 Final Thoughts and Contact Information

    Military Divorces: Tips and Insights from Family Law Experts

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 29, 2025 19:20


    Join Elizabeth Stevenson from New Direction Family Law and her colleague Ashley Oldham as they discuss the unique challenges of military divorces. In this episode, they delve into the nuances of divorce for military families, covering topics such as pension division, custody arrangements, and the Uniform Deployed Parents Custody and Visitation Act. Ashley, a board-certified family law specialist with extensive experience in military divorces, provides valuable insights on jurisdiction, survivor benefits, and child support. Whether you're a service member or a spouse, this episode is packed with essential information to help navigate the complexities of military divorces.00:00 Introduction and Guest Introduction00:38 Military Divorce Overview02:33 Jurisdiction in Military Divorces03:54 Custody Issues in Military Divorces09:49 Division of Military Pensions15:55 Domestic Violence and Military Personnel17:25 Military Support Programs and Conclusion

    Protecting Your Business in Marriage with Matthew McGonagle

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 18, 2025 17:28


    Join Sarah Hink and Ava Jeanette from New Direction Family Law as they chat with guest attorney Matt McGonagle about crucial aspects of business creation, estate planning, and protecting your business in the event of divorce or death. They discuss the importance of having proper legal agreements like operating agreements and shareholders' agreements, and dive into the complexities of trusts, estate planning, and marital protections. Learn how to safeguard your business and assets against unforeseen life events in this insightful podcast episode.00:00 Introduction and Guest Welcome00:54 Matt McGonigal's Legal Expertise01:15 Business Creation and Protection03:43 Divorce and Business Ownership06:27 Trusts and Estate Planning15:22 Final Thoughts and Contact InformationLearn more about Matt McGonagle, a board certified specialist with the North Carolina State Bar – Estate Planning and Probate LawLearn more about New Direction Family Law: https://newdirectionfamilylaw.com/contact-us-today/

    How to get a Domestic Violence Protective Order

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 4, 2025 22:45


    In this episode, Sarah J. Hink and Ava K. Jennette from New Direction Family Law discuss the procedural steps involved in obtaining a domestic violence protective order (DVPO) in North Carolina. They offer advice on resources such as local domestic violence resource centers and highlight the essential details needed in the complaint form, including specific allegations and dates. The discussion includes what to expect during the ex parte hearing, service of the abuser, and the return hearing. They also cover the potential consequences of violating a DVPO, the importance of including all relevant incidents in the complaint, and the role of Legal Aid in assisting victims. The episode provides comprehensive guidance for those looking to pursue or defend against a DVPO, emphasizing the importance of legal representation.00:00 Introduction to the Episode00:30 Understanding Domestic Violence Protective Orders01:39 Filing for a Protective Order02:25 Details and Allegations in the Complaint06:30 The Ex Parte Order Process08:47 Preparing for the Return Hearing09:57 Defending Against False Allegations13:17 Consequences of Violating a Protective Order17:56 Renewing a Protective Order19:56 Final Advice and ResourcesLearn more about New Direction Family Law: https://newdirectionfamilylaw.com/contact-us-today/

    Navigating Absolute Divorce in North Carolina - Absolutely

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 18, 2025 17:06


    Join Sarah Hink and attorney Ava Jeanette from New Direction Family Law as they delve into the intricate process of filing for absolute divorce in North Carolina. Learn about the requirements such as the mandatory one year and one day physical separation, the importance of resolving property and alimony issues beforehand, and the nuances related to service and court filings. They also discuss unique scenarios involving military service and incompetency. Whether you're doing it yourself or seeking professional help, this episode provides essential insights to guide you through the divorce proceedings.00:00 Introduction and Guest Introduction00:39 Understanding Absolute Divorce01:33 Filing for Divorce in North Carolina04:06 Checklist Before Filing for Divorce05:17 The Divorce Filing Process06:18 Service Issues in Divorce07:53 Court Procedures and Attorney Involvement14:02 Special Cases and Unique Scenarios16:27 Conclusion and Final ThoughtsLearn more about New Direction Family Law: https://newdirectionfamilylaw.com/contact-us-today/

    Rings, Romance, and Real Talk... Prenups!

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 4, 2025 21:22


    Understanding Prenuptial Agreements: Protecting Your Future and AssetsIn this episode of New Direction Family Law, Elizabeth Stevenson and Sarah Hink discuss the importance of prenuptial agreements, especially for individuals entering second marriages or who have children from previous relationships. They explain how prenups can protect personal assets, manage debts, and anticipate changes in circumstances, such as starting a business. The conversation also touches on the misconceptions about prenups, the emotional and financial implications, and the necessity of discussing finances openly before marriage. Tune in for real talk on romance, prenups, and safeguarding your future.00:00 Introduction and Importance of Prenups01:01 Meet the Team01:37 Discussing Prenups and Common Misconceptions03:05 Debt and Financial Transparency in Marriage06:16 Prenups and Business Ownership10:31 Changing Prenups: Legal Advice10:41 Prenups and Children: Legal Limitations11:11 Prenups and Infidelity Clauses11:25 Public Policy and Prenups12:22 Prenups and Coercion12:55 Timing and Prenups13:29 Prenups for Second Marriages14:10 Strange Prenup Clauses15:11 Postnups: Similarities and Differences15:58 Prenups and Business Ownership17:03 Prenups: Personal Decisions and Legal Advice

    Suddenly Single: Coping with Unexpected Separation

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 21, 2025 23:29


    In this episode, Elizabeth Stevenson and Sarah Hink from New Direction Family Law discuss the complexities and emotional challenges of separation and divorce. They share practical advice on handling separation, especially in cases of domestic violence, financial complications, and child custody. They also introduce Cam Heinsohn, their new marketing and business development manager. The conversation touches on real-life scenarios, legal strategies, and the emotional toll of ending a marriage, aiming to provide guidance and support for those going through such a difficult time.00:00 The Hardest Part of Separation00:58 Introducing the New Podcast Member02:04 Suddenly Single: Coping with Unexpected Separation05:43 Handling Separation Conversations11:39 Navigating Separation: Initial Steps12:08 Living Arrangements and Legal Implications13:27 Financial Responsibilities During Separation15:44 Court Orders and Legal Actions18:39 Consulting an Attorney: When and Why20:48 Emotional and Practical Support21:28 Finding Strength and Moving Forward

    High-Conflict Divorce: The Role of Parenting Coordinators

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 7, 2025 18:32


    In this episode of 'The Exit Strategy: Your No Bullshit Guide to Divorce,' experienced attorneys Elizabeth Stevenson and Sarah Hink from New Direction Family Law discuss the vital role of parenting coordinators in high-conflict divorce situations. Learn how parenting coordinators, either attorneys or mental health professionals, are appointed to assist co-parents in making decisions and improving communication. Discover how this essential service can help avoid prolonged court battles, reduce legal fees, and ensure the best interests of the children are prioritized. Tune in for expert insights on how to navigate co-parenting challenges effectively.00:00 Introduction to the Exit Strategy00:18 Meet the Attorneys00:42 Understanding Parenting Coordinators01:05 Role and Appointment of Parenting Coordinators01:51 Challenges in Co-Parenting03:53 Legal Implications and Court Involvement05:03 Benefits of Parenting Coordinators07:22 Practical Advice for Co-Parents17:16 Final Thoughts and Contact Information

    Navigating Taxes During Divorce: Expert Tips from Jason Deshayes

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 24, 2024 32:54


    In this episode of 'The Exit Strategy: Your No Bullsh$t Guide to Divorce,' hosts Elizabeth Stevenson and Sarah Hink from New Direction Family Law are joined by Jason Deshayes, CEO of Cook Wealth. They discuss the crucial role of financial planning and tax preparation in the context of divorce. Topics include tax liabilities, the importance of transparency in joint tax filings, handling separate and joint accounts, and the significance of consulting with CPAs and financial advisors. The episode aims to educate listeners on making informed financial decisions during and after a divorce, ensuring a smoother transition from victim to victorious and from bitter to better.00:00 Spotting Financial Red Flags in Relationships00:21 Introduction to the Exit Strategy Podcast00:53 Meet the Expert: Jason Dehe from Cook Wealth01:34 The Role of Spouses in Tax Preparation02:38 Understanding Joint Tax Returns and Liabilities03:37 The Importance of Financial Transparency in Marriage04:08 Navigating Financial Conflicts During Divorce05:22 The Benefits of Filing Taxes Separately07:31 Managing Separate and Joint Bank Accounts10:08 Handling CPA Conflicts During Divorce13:59 Dividing Assets: Brokerage vs. Retirement Accounts16:08 Navigating Financial Confusion17:21 The Role of Financial Advisors17:58 Tax and Wealth Management18:30 Cash vs. Retirement Funds19:26 Alimony and Tax Implications21:16 Pre-Planning for Divorce23:52 Financial Planning for Smaller Budgets29:10 Services Offered by Wealth Management Firms31:43 Conclusion and Contact Information

    All I want for Christmas is... An Annulment?

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 10, 2024 20:17


    Join Elizabeth A. Stephenson and Sarah J. Hink from New Direction Family Law as they explore the often misunderstood topic of annulments and how they differ from divorces. They discuss various grounds for annulments in North Carolina, including bigamy, mental incapacity, and underage marriage with parental consent. Elizabeth and Sarah also touch on some complex cases they've encountered and provide insights into legal protections and agreements that can safeguard your future. Whether you're considering an annulment or a divorce after the holidays, this informative discussion will help you understand your options.00:00 Holiday Wishes and Legal Choices00:04 Understanding Annulments01:09 Legal Grounds for Annulments in North Carolina01:48 Bigamy Cases and Legal Implications04:00 Age and Mental Capacity in Marriage06:49 Impotence and Annulment09:51 Consent and Manipulation in Marriage11:14 Hallmark Movies and Mistaken Beliefs11:40 Fraud in Marriage: Proving the Case14:14 Annulment vs. Divorce: Legal Differences15:23 Cohabitation Agreements and Property Rights17:12 Prenups and Postnups: Protecting Your Assets19:36 Final Thoughts and Holiday Wishes

    Top 10 Things to Know When Going Through a Divorce

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 9, 2024 28:39


    Summary: In this episode, Elizabeth Stephenson, Sarah Hink, and Jen Bordeaux from New Direction Family Law share the top ten essential tips and advice for navigating through a divorce. They cover both legal and personal aspects, offering practical insights and supportive guidance to help listeners manage this challenging period in their lives. From financial independence to emotional support, these tips aim to provide a comprehensive understanding of what to expect and how to handle various situations during a divorce.Key Points:Your Kids Will Be OkayEmphasize the importance of shielding children from conflict.Tips on co-parenting and maintaining a healthy relationship with your children.Love Your Kids More Than You Hate Your ExAvoid speaking negatively about your ex in front of your children.Focus on your children's well-being rather than on past grievances.There's Always a Way to Make It Work FinanciallyDiscuss strategies for financial independence.Importance of understanding your financial situation and planning accordingly.Don't Use Your Attorney for Emotional SupportSeek professional counseling for emotional needs.Focus on using your attorney for legal advice and strategy.Things Might Get Worse Before They Get BetterPrepare for potential escalation of conflict during the process.Stay focused on long-term outcomes and personal growth.Focus on Yourself and Set BoundariesPrioritize self-care and establish clear boundaries with your ex.Use tools like Our Family Wizard for communication.Unfriend or Block Your Ex on Social MediaAvoid the temptation to stalk or engage with your ex online.Protect your mental health by limiting exposure to potentially upsetting content.Treat Communications as Though They Will Be Read in CourtAlways maintain a respectful and factual tone in written communications.Understand that any communication could be used as evidence.Surround Yourself with Supportive PeopleLean on friends, family, or support groups for emotional support.Avoid people who encourage negative or aggressive behavior.Don't Rush into Dating After DivorceTake time to heal and reflect on your past relationship.Ensure you are emotionally ready before starting a new relationship.Resources Mentioned:Our Family Wizard and other co-parenting tools.Professional counselors and therapists.Support groups and online communities for divorced individuals.Call to Action:Follow New Direction Family Law on TikTok for more tips and insights.Reach out to a professional counselor for emotional support.Consult with an attorney to understand your legal rights and options.Conclusion: Divorce can be a challenging and emotional journey, but by following these ten tips, you can navigate it more effectively. Focus on your well-being, seek appropriate support, and take one step at a time to ensure a better future for yourself and your children.

    Courtroom Drama: How to Avoid Being a Hot Mess

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 25, 2024 18:01


    Summary: In this insightful episode, Elizabeth Stephenson, Sarah Hink, and Jen Bordeaux from New Direction Family Law discuss essential tips and advice for anyone preparing to go to court. Drawing from their extensive experience, they provide practical do's and don'ts to help listeners present themselves effectively and navigate the courtroom with confidence. The episode covers everything from appropriate attire and punctuality to emotional control and the importance of honesty.Key Points:Introduction and Overview (00:00:00)Hosts introduce themselves and the topic of the episode.Elizabeth and Sarah share their extensive courtroom experiences.Courtroom Etiquette: Do's and Don'ts (00:01:18)Importance of dressing appropriately for court.Avoiding casual attire such as running shorts, flip-flops, and tank tops.Respect and Behavior in Court (00:02:12)Respecting the judge and courtroom officials.Do not interrupt the judge or make inappropriate gestures.Punctuality is Key (00:06:00)Always arrive on time for court hearings.Plan your route and parking in advance to ensure timely arrival.Emotional Control (00:05:19)Importance of maintaining composure and controlling emotions in court.Avoid eye-rolling, sighing, and other negative expressions.Preparation and Honesty (00:12:12)Being prepared with all necessary documents well in advance.Always be honest with your attorney and in court to avoid damaging your case.Courtroom Procedures and Expectations (00:14:53)Understanding the flow of a court case and what to expect.The significance of hearing prep meetings and following your attorney's guidance.Children in Court (00:10:41)Avoid bringing children to court unless absolutely necessary.Impact of childcare challenges for low-income families attending court.Community and Judicial Support (00:16:14)Appreciation for the judicial community and legal professionals.The importance of respecting the legal process and the roles of everyone involved.Conclusion and Final Thoughts (00:17:08)Encouragement to follow the discussed tips for a smoother court experience.Mention of New Direction Family Law's TikTok account for more insights.Resources Mentioned:New Direction Family Law TikTok account for additional tips and insights.Call to Action:Follow New Direction Family Law on TikTok for more helpful content.Reach out to your attorney with any questions or for further guidance on preparing for court.

    Pride Month Special: Navigating Family Law for LGBTQ+ Couples

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 11, 2024 16:17


    Summary: In this special Pride Month episode, Elizabeth Stephenson, Sarah Hink, and Jen Bordeaux discuss the intricacies of family law as it pertains to same-sex relationships. The episode delves into the legal challenges and considerations for LGBTQ+ couples, particularly in North Carolina. Topics include custody issues, child support, surrogacy, adoption, and the recent Court of Appeals case affecting same-sex couples. The hosts emphasize the importance of legal guidance and community support for LGBTQ+ families.00:00 Introduction and Greetings00:49 Busy Times in Family Law01:16 Pride Month and Family Law01:56 Legal Nuances of Same-Sex Marriage03:22 Common Law Marriage Explained04:34 Recent Court Case on Same-Sex Custody11:55 Surrogacy and Adoption Considerations13:33 Community Support and Resources15:39 Conclusion and Call to ActionKey Points:Introduction to Pride Month Overview of the significance of Pride Month.Brief discussion on the recent uptick in divorce and separation cases.Legal Landscape for Same-Sex Couples Examination of the laws applying to same-sex marriages in North Carolina.Challenges faced by same-sex couples regarding asset division, spousal support, and custody.Recent Court of Appeals Case Analysis of a recent case involving custody and child support for a non-biological parent in a same-sex relationship.Discussion on the legal interpretation of “mother” and “father” in child support statutes.Common Law Marriage and Custody Explanation of common law marriage and its non-recognition in North Carolina.Legal nuances in custody and child support for same-sex couples.Adoption and Surrogacy Considerations (00:12:30)Importance of legal contracts in adoption and surrogacy.Steps involved in ensuring parental rights and responsibilities are protected.Community Support and Resources Highlighting local resources and support systems for LGBTQ+ families.Encouragement to engage with local community centers and legal professionals.Advocacy and Legal Reform Call to action for legal reforms to ensure equality and fairness for all families.Importance of voting and reaching out to legislative representatives.Resources Mentioned:Local LGBTQIA+ community centers and support groups.Legal professionals specializing in family law for same-sex couples.Mental health professionals with a focus on LGBTQ+ issues.Call to Action:Get involved in local advocacy for legal reforms.Reach out to community resources for support and guidance.Contact legal professionals for advice on family law matters.

    Terminal Trials: Custody Concerns

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 30, 2024 22:04


    Episode Summary:In this episode, Sarah Hink, a seasoned family law attorney, explores a significant North Carolina Court of Appeals case that sheds light on custody disputes, particularly focusing on the implications of a parent's terminal illness and the subsequent legal maneuvers to ensure the well-being of the child involved. With Elizabeth Stevenson absent due to other legal obligations, Jen Bordeaux steps in to co-host, ensuring the conversation remains insightful, informative, and engaging. The episode delves into the complexities of custody appeals, the importance of timing in legal filings, and the rights of biological and non-biological family members in custody cases.Key Topics Discussed:The role of the Court of Appeals and its function in the legal hierarchy.A deep dive into a recent Court of Appeals case from Guilford County, highlighting the challenges and strategic legal actions taken amidst a parent's terminal illness.The legal nuances and implications of filing motions to modify custody and intervene in ongoing custody cases.The significance of a parent's death on custody disputes and the intervention rights of grandparents and other relatives.Insights into proving a parent unfit and the legal hurdles involved in non-biological family members seeking custody.Discussion on the legal strategies and emotional considerations necessary when planning for custody amidst life-changing events like terminal illness.The limitations of wills in dictating custody outcomes post a parent's demise.Episode Highlights:Learn about the critical importance of timely and strategic legal filings in custody disputes, especially in light of terminal illness.Discover the legal complexities surrounding custody modifications, interventions, and the unique challenges faced by non-biological relatives in securing custody rights.Gain insights into the real-life impact of family law issues on the well-being of children and the importance of experienced legal counsel in navigating these challenges.Recommended Resources:Previous episodes on topics such as parental alienation and the legal challenges faced by same-sex couples in custody disputes.Consultation with a specialized family law attorney for personal guidance and support in custody and family law matters.Closing Thoughts:The intersection of family law with deeply personal life events such as terminal illness presents both emotional and legal challenges. This episode highlights the crucial role of informed legal action in safeguarding the future of children caught in the midst of custody disputes. Through a discussion on a poignant Court of Appeals case, listeners are reminded of the complexities of the legal system and the vital need for expert legal advice in these sensitive situations.Reminder: For those navigating similar challenges or seeking legal counsel, it's essential to consult with a knowledgeable family law attorney to understand the best course of action for your unique circumstances.

    The Art of Divorce Rituals: Breaking Bonds, Building Bridges

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 16, 2024 26:35


    Episode Summary:In this episode of the New Direction Family Law podcast, hosts Sarah Hink and Jenn Bordeaux are joined by Elizabeth Barbour, a seasoned life and business coach with 24 years of experience, and the author of "Sacred Celebrations: Designing Rituals to Navigate Life's Big Transitions." Coming from Asheville, North Carolina, Elizabeth shares her profound insights into the importance of rituals in marking significant life changes, particularly focusing on divorce. The conversation uncovers the therapeutic power of creating personalized rituals to process and celebrate the end of a marriage, alongside the grieving process akin to dealing with death and loss. Through Elizabeth's personal stories and expertise, listeners are guided on how to create meaningful rituals that acknowledge the past, heal the present, and welcome the future.Key Topics Discussed:The significance of rituals in navigating life transitions, especially divorce.Elizabeth Barber's journey into life, business coaching, and her inspiration behind her latest book.Personal divorce rituals: Elizabeth shares her experiences with two divorces and how rituals helped her heal.Suggestions for divorce rituals include symbolic actions like walking the Great Wall of China and hosting backward weddings.The concept of a "familyversary" to maintain family bonds post-divorce.Ideas for involving children in divorce rituals to ensure they feel included and secure.The importance of closure, letting go, and setting positive intentions for the future.Episode Highlights:Learn about the unique and empowering ways people have chosen to mark their transition from married to single life.Discover how rituals can serve as a tool for healing, closure, and even celebration amidst the pain of divorce.Understand the impact of divorce on families and how to create rituals that honor the changes while reinforcing family continuity.Guest Contact Information:Elizabeth BarbourWebsite: https://elizabethbarbour.com/Book: "Sacred Celebrations: Designing Rituals to Navigate Life's Milestone Transitions" available on Amazon and Elizabeth's website.Closing Thoughts:Divorce, much like any major life transition, brings with it a mixture of emotions, from grief and loss to relief and new beginnings. Through the lens of Elizabeth Barber's expertise and heartfelt advice, this episode invites listeners to embrace the healing power of rituals. By marking the end of a marriage with intention and grace, individuals can find peace and pave the way for a hopeful future.Remember: Safety first! If any ritual involves fire or physical activity, take necessary precautions to ensure a safe and positive experience.

    Betting Against the House: When Gambling Threatens Marriage

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 2, 2024 18:29


    Episode Summary:In this insightful episode, Sarah Hink, an experienced attorney and partner at New Direction Family Law, is joined by Jennifer Bordeaux in the absence of Elizabeth Stevenson. As North Carolina embraces March Madness, the duo dives into the recent legalization of online sports betting in the state, its implications for family dynamics, and how it intersects with legal considerations in family law. They explore the excitement of the NCAA basketball season, the thrill of online gambling, and the potential dark side of gambling addiction and its impact on relationships and financial stability.Key Topics Discussed:Introduction to the legalization of online sports betting in North Carolina.The excitement around March Madness and the state's basketball teams.The potential fun and risks associated with online gambling.Gambling addiction as a serious concern, affecting relationships and leading to financial instability.The significance of financial transparency and communication in relationships.Legal implications of gambling in divorce and separation cases, including financial disputes and the division of debt.The process of discovery in legal cases to uncover hidden gambling debts.Strategies for addressing gambling issues within a relationship, including postnuptial agreements and seeking professional help.The importance of financial literacy and awareness, especially for women.The role of financial counseling and support in understanding and managing finances.Advice for Listeners:Be vigilant about the signs of gambling addiction and its impact on your relationship and finances.Maintain open communication about finances with your partner, and seek joint solutions to manage gambling behaviors.Consider legal advice early if gambling becomes a contentious issue in your relationship, especially concerning separation or divorce proceedings.Engage in financial education and counseling to better understand and manage your finances, particularly in the context of marriage and potential separation.Closing Thoughts:While online gambling brings a new layer of excitement to sports and entertainment, it also poses significant risks that can escalate into serious relationship and financial problems. Awareness, communication, and proactive legal and financial planning are key to navigating these challenges.

    Facebook's Legal Advice Fails: The Not-So-Fine Print

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 23, 2024 37:36


    Overview: This episode of "Exit Strategy" delves into the risks and misunderstandings surrounding seeking and giving legal advice on Facebook. Hosts Elizabeth A. Stephenson, a family law attorney, and Jennifer Bordeaux, specializing in marketing and beyond at New Direction Family Law, dissect real examples from social media, highlighting the misinformation often spread in these platforms.Key Points Discussed:The Danger of Unqualified Legal Advice: The hosts emphasize the pitfalls of taking legal advice from unqualified individuals on social media, particularly Facebook. They analyze several examples where advice, often well-meaning, is legally incorrect and potentially harmful.Legal Misconceptions: Common misconceptions about family law, such as separation regulations, child support, and property division, are addressed. The hosts clarify these issues, contrasting them with the inaccurate advice found online.Importance of Professional Guidance: The conversation repeatedly stresses the importance of consulting a professional attorney for legal matters. The hosts discuss how personal experiences and opinions shared on social media cannot replace tailored legal advice.Varied Legal Outcomes: The episode highlights how legal outcomes can significantly vary based on individual circumstances, underscoring the limitations of generalized advice on social media.Closing Thoughts: The hosts conclude by urging listeners to be cautious with the information on social media and to seek professional legal advice for their specific situations.Listen to the full episode for an in-depth exploration of the complexities of legal advice in the age of social media.

    Love, Marriage, and How Not to End Up in a True Crime Podcast with Amanda Lamb

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 9, 2024 34:04


    Our Guest:Amanda Lamb is a veteran television crime reporter with more than three decades of experience and is also a podcast host and producer. She works for award-winning WRAL TV in Raleigh, North Carolina. Amanda currently hosts and produces a weekday morning podcast called the WRAL Daily Download. She has also hosted and produced two true crime podcasts and has another on the way. Follow the Truth was released in 2021 and won the prestigious regional Edward R. Murrow award for excellence in journalism. What Remainswas released in 2022. The Killing Month is scheduled for release in the summer of 2023.Amanda has written and published a dozen books. Her fictional murder mystery series includes: Dead Last, Lies That Bindand No Wake Zone. Amanda is also the author of three true crime books based on murder cases she covered for WRAL including: Deadly Dose, Evil Next Door, and Love Lies. She has published four memoirs, one about caregiving and three about parenting, including: The Living Room, I Love You to God and Back, Girls Gone Child, and Smotherhood, and two children's books, I Love You to God and Back and We Are Not the Same. Amanda writes a monthly blog on WRAL's website called “Go Ask Mom.” To learn more about Amanda and her work go to www.alambauthor.com. You can also follow her on social media.Facebook: @wralAmandaLamb  @stagemight Twitter: @alamb Instagram: @wral_amanda_lamb.------------------------------------------------------------------------Episode Overview:This episode of "Exit Strategy" features Amanda Lamb, a seasoned reporter from WRAL, as she discusses various aspects of crime and domestic violence and her experiences in reporting and authoring books on these topics.Key Discussion points:True Crime Books: Lamb talks about her books, including 'Deadly Dose' and 'Love Lies,' which delve into high-profile murder cases involving domestic violence.Domestic Violence Insights: The conversation highlights the complex nature of domestic violence, touching upon its psychological aspects, including financial control and emotional abuse.Legal Perspectives: Lamb and the hosts discuss the legal implications and challenges in domestic violence cases, emphasizing the difficulty in prosecuting non-physical forms of abuse.Impact on Children: The episode underscores the lasting impact of domestic violence on children, with Lamb discussing this theme in her mystery series and real-world cases.Investigative Challenges: Lamb highlights advancements in DNA technology and their role in solving cold cases, sharing insights from her true crime podcast projects.Personal Projects: Amanda discusses her upcoming projects, including a book set in the mountains about a missing hiker and a podcast about women transforming their lives post-50.Conclusion:The episode provides a comprehensive look at domestic violence, its societal impact, and the role of media in bringing these stories to light, driven by Amanda Lamb's extensive experience in crime reporting and storytelling.

    New Year, New Me - How to prepare if you're considering divorce in 2024

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 12, 2023 35:20


    Hosts: Elizabeth Stephenson and Jen Bordeaux from New Direction Family Law.Topic: Preparing for and navigating separation and divorce.Key Discussions: The tendency for people to consider separation post-holidays. Consultations as a tool for preparation and planning, offering legal advice and a "toolbox" for navigating separation. Addressing fears and misconceptions about custody and financial survival post-separation. The importance of individual plans and strategies in the context of family law. The role of attorneys in providing guidance and representation. Specific Advice: Different aspects of family law: custody, child support, spousal support, and property distribution. Approaches to dealing with joint property and finances in separation. The ethical boundaries of consultations and the importance of confidentiality. Audience: Individuals considering separation or divorce, seeking practical and legal advice. Tone: Informative, supportive, addressing complex emotional and legal aspects of separation with clarity.

    Breaking the Rules: What to do if Your Ex Isn't Following a Court Order or Separation Agreement.

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 29, 2023 23:18


    The episode's topic is the serious implications of violating a court order, specifically in the context of family law.Violating Court Orders: Discuss common ways people violate court orders, including not following custody or child support orders. An explanation is that judges are not pleased with non-compliance and the importance of settling cases to have a say in the outcome. Once a judge gives an order, it must be followed. Even if one has a custody order, law enforcement may not get involved. Remedies for Violation: If one is constantly late for exchanges or violates the order in other ways, the remedy often starts with contacting an attorney. Options include contacting the other party's attorney to resolve the issue without court intervention. If resolution is not possible, filing a motion for an order to show cause and motion for contempt is the next step. Repercussions and Types of Contempt: Courts have a wide range of repercussions. Two types of contempt are discussed: civil and criminal. Civil contempt can lead to jail until compliance is achieved, and criminal contempt is seen as punishment. Discussion on the power of judges to modify custody or support orders and the likelihood of immediate payment once jailed. Understanding Court Orders: Importance of having an order in place and the challenges if there's no signed order in the court file. Frustration when parties continue to do as they please without a signed order and the limits of what attorneys can do in such cases. Criteria for Contempt and Costs: Trivial violations like being 15 minutes late may not be enough for contempt. The financial aspect of filing another motion and going to court is highlighted.

    I Want Out: How to Tell Your Spouse You Want a Divorce

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 15, 2023 32:44


    You don't want to start the beginning of the end conflicted. So when possible be kind.  Discussion About Guests and Support: Mention guests who have supported people during a divorce. Emphasizing the need for support for those who have been through divorce. Introduction of Tracey Stracener with Simply Thrive Therapeutic Associates: Discussion about her role in supporting people through divorce. Introducing the topic: telling your spouse that you want to leave. Tracey Speaks About Her Practice: Overview of working at Simply Thrive Therapeutic Associates, focusing on trauma therapy. Discussing the trauma involved in asking for a divorce and the delicate nature of the subject. Emphasizes her love for working with women and her approach to therapy. Discussion on Therapy and Moving Forward: Tracey details her work with individuals, couples, and families. The hosts and Tracey discuss the theme of moving forward. Navigating the Emotional Aspect of Divorce: Discussion on how to handle telling a spouse about wanting a divorce. Consideration of keeping secrets and preparing for the other person's reaction. Discussion about taking various individual responses to a divorce request. Dealing with Narcissistic Personalities: Reflection on encountering narcissistic personalities in their line of work. Contemplating how to approach a conversation with someone with a narcissistic personality.

    From Tin Cup to Enforcing a Prenup: Our Take on Kevin Costner's Divorce

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 1, 2023 17:42


    Introduction Elizabeth Stephenson and Sarah introduced themselves from New Direction, Family Law. They discuss their passion for trash-talking and telemetry. Main Topic: Rich People's Divorces The topic concerns divorces, specifically among the rich, covering issues like child support, custody, and property. More money is involved, but issues are similar to average divorces. Kevin Costner's Divorce Drama Focusing on the Kevin Costner divorce drama from his longtime wife, who married in 2004. Discussion of a prenuptial agreement. Elizabeth and Sarah role-play representing wife and husband, respectively. Property Issues Fifty-eight thousand square feet property with various amenities discussed. They are debating over property rights and why the wife has to leave. The property includes the main house, fishing lodge, guest house, baseball field, etc. Child Support and Prenup Child support amount: around $129,000 a month. Prenup required Kevin Costner to pay $1.4 million to his wife. Concerns about how long she can survive on that sum. Humorous discussion on dividing up pots and pans in the divorce. Caretakers and House Maintenance Discussions about the extensive care required for the property. The debate over environmental issues and large houses. Legal Considerations Discussion on prenup legality and limitations regarding child support. The hosts mention the surprise at the large child support order in this case. Overall ToneA mix of serious legal insights and lighthearted banter about celebrity lifestyles and legal proceedings related to divorce.

    Til Death or Divorce Do Us Part: The intersection of family law and estate planning featuring Adam Hopler

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 13, 2023 35:33


    Guest: Adam Hopler, an Estate Attorney from the firm Hopler, Wilms, & Hanna PLLC. Adam shares about his personal background, including his experience of practicing law in Durham for 12 years and being a father to six kids. Discussion about the intersection of family law and estate planning: how divorce and separation can impact one's estate and the importance of consultation with estate attorneys. The podcast addresses certain scenarios where it becomes essential to speak with an estate attorney, such as in cases of separations involving substantial estates or closely held businesses. Adam elaborates on how estate planning isn't just about the individual but also about those around them, who may end up dealing with the consequences of inadequate planning. Discussion on the need for life insurance and how it's meant to cover debts so that dependents don't have to. The podcast addresses the importance of revisiting estate plans periodically due to life changes and gives an example of how the pandemic has accelerated these changes for many. Adam talks about the significance of beneficiary designations and shares an anecdote from his law school days. Discussion about what happens if a person dies without a will, or 'intestate', in North Carolina, with particular emphasis on the role of a spouse and children in the division of the estate. The hosts conclude with a discussion on the importance of estate planning, even in complex family situations, such as split families, and during periods of separation before divorce is finalized. Note: For expert advice tailored to your specific circumstances, it is always recommended to consult with a certified legal professional in your area.

    Discussing Separation and Divorce with Children

    Play Episode Listen Later May 30, 2023 24:16


    Guest: LINDSEY OHLER, PSY.D.  Introduction:Hosts Elizabeth Stevenson and Sarah Hink from New Direction Family Law invite Dr. Lindsay Oler to discuss a critical topic - how to approach the conversation about separation and divorce with children. The Emotional Impact of Divorce on Children:Dr. Oler emphasizes the profound emotional effects of divorce on children, comparing the experience to grief. She highlights the need for care and gentleness while discussing separation with children, regardless of age. The Perceptive Nature of Children:Discussing how even if parents try to shield their children from their disputes, children are intuitive and often sense that something is wrong. Breaking the News as a United Front:Dr. Oler recommends both parents be present when informing children about the divorce. This provides a united front and reassures the child. Approaching Different Age Groups:The conversation varies based on the child's age. For a two-year-old, keep the explanation simple. For older kids, explain the logistics of the new living arrangements without delving into the details of the separation. Creating Comfort in New Spaces:Encourage children to participate in creating their new spaces in separate homes. This could include choosing room colors or selecting mementos from their previous home. Discussing Divorce with Teenagers:Teenagers, who tend to pick sides, balance their time with parents and friends. Parents must maintain control of their emotions during the conversation, provide reassurance, and refrain from oversharing details of the divorce. Protecting Sensitive Information:Parents must secure any divorce-related documents (both hard copies and electronic) to prevent their children from stumbling upon them and causing potential distress. Effect on Adult Children:Even adult children might struggle with their parent's divorce, questioning their relationships and family identity. Therapy for Children:Therapy could benefit children as young as three, helping them navigate the emotional turbulence during a divorce. Stay tuned for more episodes as we navigate the complexities of family law together.

    Divorcing a Sociopath with Kerrie Droban

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 25, 2023 24:57


    In this episode of the New Direction Family Law Podcast, Elizabeth, Sarah, and guest Kerrie Droban discuss the pathology of the criminal mind and identify the traits of sociopaths, psychopaths, and narcissists in the context of family law. They also provide strategies for victims to protect themselves and unmask their abusers during litigation. Elizabeth and Sarah from New Direction Family Law are joined by Kerrie Droban, an award-winning true crime author and criminal and family law attorney. Kerrie Droban shares her expertise on the pathology of the criminal mind, focusing on identifying the personality disorder traits of narcissists, psychopaths, and sociopaths. While not all of these personalities have criminal intent, their dangerous behaviors make them a threat to those around them. Victims of abusive relationships with dark personalities often suffer psychological abuse, leading to gaps in their stories, making litigation difficult. Unmasking the psychopath, narcissist, or sociopath is the key to getting the victim out of the abusive relationship and prevailing in litigation. Kerrie shares strategies to educate people in the courtroom about these personality disorders to gain a stronger position in litigation. https://www.kerriedroban.com zhivagolaw@gmail.comKerrie's books on AmazonKerrie's writing workshop LinkedInInstagramzhivagolaw@gmail.com

    I Always Feel Like Somebody's Watching Me: Is Your Spouse Spying on You?

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 11, 2023 18:31


    What do you do if you think someone is stalking you, digitally or in real life... Spying is a common issue in family law cases. People may spy on their spouses because they suspect infidelity or substance abuse. Hiring a private investigator or conducting your own investigation by looking through trash or tracking purchases can gather evidence. Spouses may spy by following their partner, audio or video recording, accessing emails or phone data, or installing tracking devices on cars or personal items. AirTags can be used to track people discreetly. If you suspect someone is spying on you, talk to an attorney and consider having a specialist scan your devices. Change passwords, set up new email accounts, and be aware of your surroundings to protect your privacy. Mental health concerns may need to be addressed if someone is overly paranoid about being spied on.

    Divorce Lawyers at Your Service for Service Members

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 28, 2023 16:57


    Sarah, a partner and attorney at New Direction Family Law, interviewed Ashley Oldham, another partner, and attorney at the same firm, about military divorces. Military divorces have unique challenges, such as deployments, custody during deployment, and division of military pensions and benefits. There are three bases for jurisdiction under federal law regarding military pensions: consent, domicile, and residency for reasons other than military assignments. To benefit from certain accounts, no set length for marriage is required. Still, if the marriage overlaps with military service for ten years, the spouse can receive direct payments from the Defense Finance and Accounting Service. It is crucial to pick an attorney who knows enough about military divorce to understand what they do not know and can outsource to others. In a military divorce, all military entitlements count for child support, not just taxable income. The frozen benefit rule, which affects how much of a pension a former spouse is entitled to, has changed with the National Defense Authorization Act and may be worth less than expected due to disability benefits. Survivor benefits are unitary benefits, meaning they go to one person, but the pension can be divided among multiple spouses. Military attorneys are available for legal assistance, but they may not be licensed in the state and may not be knowledgeable about family law.

    Relocation Relocation Relocation

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 28, 2023 19:39


    In this episode: What are some reasons that the court would say you can move or not move during a divorce? Domestic violence is a completely different circumstance. Some of the things the court considers is: will it benefit the child family crime statistics culture & art an opportunity to make a better living Many times a separation agreement will outline terms related to relocating. What can happen if a parent does move with the kids without a court order? The age of children and connections they have with friends, school, sports, and their community often will factor into a judges decision as well. Help your friends going through a divorce go from victim to victorious and bitter to better.If you like The Ex-it Strategy, visit our website to subscribe for free, and you'll never miss an episode. And if you like the Ex-it Strategy, We'd appreciate you telling a friend (maybe even two). 

    Prenups - Love em or hate em

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 14, 2023 27:07


    In this episode: What is a prenup and why is it important Advantages and disadvantages of prenups When should a couple consider getting a prenup Common misunderstandings and myths about prenups What should couples consider when creating a prenup What are the legal requirements of a prenup How do you make sure that a prenup is legally binding What happens if a prenup is challenged in court How can couples protect their assets and interests with a prenup Help your friends going through a divorce go from victim to victorious and bitter to better.If you like The Ex-it Strategy, visit our website to subscribe for free, and you'll never miss an episode. And if you like the Ex-it Strategy, We'd appreciate you telling a friend (maybe even two). 

    2023 FAQs with Super Lawyers

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 24, 2023 37:58


    In this episode I've been separated for a week can I get on tinder? We just got married on a week ago, it was a mistake, can we get an annulment? I've been living in NC for a while now and I need to change my custody order, but it is from another state. How do I do it? I think my spouse is hiding income during the divorce, how do I find out? There is no custody order in place but the other parent is with-holding the child from me. What can I do? I've been separated for a bazillion years and I want to file but I don't know where my ex is now? If I'm willing to separate and leave the home, should I take the kids with me? If I choose to leave the house do I loose the rights to my house? My divorce is final, but we didn't do anything with the house we jointly own. Do I still get my equity from the home? My soon-to-be-ex wants the divorce, they should have to pay for it, can we make them? Is cryptocurrency considered martial property? Do you have experience working with narcissistic behaviors? Have we seen an uptick in divorces since COVID-19? Help your friends going through a divorce go from victim to victorious and bitter to better.If you like The Ex-it Strategy, visit our website to subscribe for free, and you'll never miss an episode. And if you like the Ex-it Strategy, We'd appreciate you telling a friend (maybe even two). 

    David E. Amiss talks assets evaluation

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 27, 2022 41:16


    In this episode David assists attorneys, business owners, and other professionals in determining the value of a company or interest. He focuses primarily on family law, gift and estate, and mergers and acquisitions.  His clients enjoy working with him because of his years of experience and choice to pursue long-lasting, trusted relationships. David strives to go beyond just providing a report; instead, he finds ways to communicate why business value is important and help his clients understand every aspect.  David works with Carr, Riggs & Ingram (CRI), a Top 25 nationally-ranked accounting and advisory firm driven by relationships to cultivate growth. What do you need to do to get an accurate business evaluation? We talk about the process.  In a divorce, people often assume their spouse's business is worth more than reported because of money paid under the table, etc. David says you can pay his firm 10-20k to forensic investigation if you believe they are hiding money, but you may be losing money if they are not. There are three ways to determine the valuation of a company The asset approach (the fair market value of those assets minus debt) The market approach (looking at the sale price of other businesses similar to the company being evaluated) The income approach (value=benefits over risks) When two spouses are in the same business, they each secure services of a firm to get the business evaluated. How do you handle it when the valuations differ?  Help your friends going through a divorce go from victim to victorious and bitter to better.If you like The Ex-it Strategy, visit our website to subscribe for free, and you'll never miss an episode. And if you like the Ex-it Strategy, We'd appreciate you telling a friend (maybe even two). 

    Military Divorce with Attorney Ashley L. Oldham

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 13, 2022 24:45


    In this episode We talk about the different aspects of divorce as it applies to military families. We discuss pensions and how the National Defense Authorization Act changed what a spouse winds up with a divorce. It gives spouses of service members a pension that ends on the day of divorce instead of the full percentage.  If you are getting ready to marry someone in the military, we discuss prenups and specifics surrounding military cases. One of the most challenging aspects of a military marriage is the potential of moving often and having a spouse who travels a lot. Military members have the highest divorce rate of any profession. We discuss child custody issues for children of military divorce, which can get complicated with the frequent travel required for military service members. North Carolina specifically has the uniform deployed parents custody and visitation act that allows service members to delegate some of their custodial time to a new spouse or a family member while deployed. Help your friends going through a divorce go from victim to victorious and bitter to better.If you like The Ex-it Strategy, visit our website to subscribe for free, and you'll never miss an episode. And if you like the Ex-it Strategy, We'd appreciate you telling a friend (maybe even two). 

    Legal Fees: Who, What, Why, When and How Much?

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 15, 2022 33:38


    In this episode Why do you have to pay for an initial consultation. This is the reserved time for you to sit with your attorney to get a snapshot of what's going on and answer your questions, educate you of your legal rights and options, and help you develop your plan moving forward. You will be listened to and not "talked-at." Make sure you tell us all the facts, we are not biased or judgmental. We want to help you. Really what an initial consultation boils down to is information gathering. It is an extremely comprehensive consultation.  If you do a consultation does that mean we are your attorney? No. It does conflict us out from representing your opposing party. If I found an online template that is much cheaper, why should I hire an attorney? We discuss this mentality. We talk about how legal fees work, what a retainer is, and how an attorney bills for their time. We define what an hourly rate is from your attorney's perspective. Can the opposing party pay for your initial retainer?  Help your friends who may be going through a divorce go from victim to victorious and bitter to better.If you like The Ex-it Strategy, visit our website to subscribe free, and you'll never miss an episode. And if you like the Ex-it Strategy, We'd appreciate you telling a friend (maybe even two). 

    Do You Really Want Your Day in Court?

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 25, 2022 24:34


    In this episode Let's take a relatively simple case where you have temporary custody and support hearing that is limited to two hours with two issues. It will likely take your attorneys four to six hours to prepare. We walk through some common outcomes for time spent in court in various situations. All the judge has to go on, often times is the credibility of the testimony of those on the stand. So freezing up or not representing yourself well can be very costly. We talk about the sad fact that "people lie all the time." In our experience it never goes as you plan.  A lot of people don't understand that your attorneys are timed in court and the time needs to be spent on issues that can effect the outcome, not just the issues that have upset you personally. Post separation support is difficult to settle because there is no equation like there is in child support. We talk about the efficacy of mediation and why we love it. If one person has more money than their spouse, it can be sad reality that they can litigate their spouse until they're broke. It is sad, but it does happen. If someone offers you mediation you should attempt it in good faith. Help your friends who may be going through a divorce go from victim to victorious and bitter to better.If you like The Ex-it Strategy, visit our website to subscribe free, and you'll never miss an episode. And if you like the Ex-it Strategy, We'd appreciate you telling a friend (maybe even two). 

    The Legal Ramifications of Social Media Cheating

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 4, 2022 15:11


    In this episode We discuss what is happening in celebrity news in the case of Adam Levine. Has he cheated in the eyes of the law? From Adam Levine "I used poor judgment in speaking with anyone other than my wife in any kind of flirtatious ma manner, I did not have an affair. Nevertheless, I crossed the line during a regrettable period in my life. In certain instances, it became inappropriate. I have addressed that and taken proactive steps to remedy this with my family." North Carolina is a no fault state, so whether or not someone cheated is not necessary for a divorce in our state. We talk about what constitutes as illicit sexual behavior in North Carolina and what it effects legally. What do attorneys and judges look for in proving alienation of affection? Help your friends who may be going through a divorce go from victim to victorious and bitter to better.If you like The Ex-it Strategy, visit our website to subscribe free, and you'll never miss an episode. And if you like the Ex-it Strategy, We'd appreciate you telling a friend (maybe even two). 

    Parental Alienation with Julianne Ludlam, Ph.D.

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 9, 2022 24:15


    In this episode The idea around parental alienation is that one parent is doing things to alienate their child from the other parent. It could be saying bad things about the other parent, not allowing communication, restricting access, etc.  Richard Gardner was the first one to coin this term. Here are a couple of facts about him: He had no research experience. It was based on nothing but clinical opinion.  He was a part-time clinical professor as a psychoanalyst.  And it was horrible.  It was very misogynistic.  He would always say 90% of the time, it was mothers alienating a father. Some examples of parental alienating; Telling false stories about the parent, telling negative stories, not communicating with the parent with the other parent, and not allowing access. Inflexible, Pretty restricting, acting like the other parent is dangerous, portraying them as difficult or scary to the child. These are all things that can do damage to a child's relationship with that parent.   The cases most strongly presented to the court are when there's actual physical withholding of the children. Everyone asks at what point can the child decide they don't want to go in the visit, and it's not going to matter. There is no actual age that a child can determine if they want to go in for a visit. Do we talk about the effects on the children of this behavior by their parents? Do we talk about what tips would you give the other non-alienating parent? If you could manage to tell good stories, boost their image, be flexible, promote access, and promote that relationship, your child benefits from that relationship. If you damage that relationship, you are hurting your child. Parental alienation, when it's severe, is considered child abuse. Most of the time, both parents share some responsibility for this. Maybe one parent is doing a lot of the alienating behaviors, but the other parent might be doing some as well. Help your friends who may be going through a divorce go from victim to victorious and bitter to better.If you like The Ex-it Strategy, visit our website to subscribe free, and you'll never miss an episode. And if you like the Ex-it Strategy, We'd appreciate you telling a friend (maybe even two). 

    Divorcing in Today's Real Estate Market

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 26, 2022 24:36


    In this episode Meredith Pope is a realtor with Inhabit Real Estate. And Christina Jasper is a mortgage lender and the branch manager at Benchmark Mortgage. They both specialize in helping people going through divorce and separation work and helping people decide what they're gonna do with their house? Who's gonna keep it, and how are we gonna finance it? A lot of times, the house is the biggest asset or cash asset. They may have some retirement or something, but that's all people many going through divorce have to divide. Christina and Meredith explain that it is possible for you to make a stable financial plan when you've had to take care of the kids for five years or have a lower-paying job.   Rental prices are going up. This is the best time for those folks actually because the market is cooling off a little bit, and there are more opportunities now than there were even a couple of months ago. They explain that communication should be separate because there are so many opportunities to disagree. Meredith, and people like her, can serve as that much-needed mediation. Christina and Meredith recommend resolving the financial issues, contract, and separation agreement first and THEN putting custody or custody and child support in a court order because you can modify those in the future. One reason they love their job is seeing their clients making individual decisions when they're used to making joint decisions. They go from not knowing which end is up to empowered individuals capable of making it on their own.  Help your friends who may be going through a divorce go from victim to victorious and bitter to better.If you like The Ex-it Strategy, visit our website to subscribe free, and you'll never miss an episode. And if you really like the Ex-it Strategy, We'd appreciate you telling a friend (maybe even two). 

    What to expect at a consultation with Kelli McGonagle

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 5, 2022 24:21


    In this episode Kelli declared at eight years old that she wanted to be an attorney.  Her caring and compassionate nature, and her passion for advocating for children, led her to the practice of family law.  Kelli seeks to help families through some of the most difficult times in their lives while keeping the best interest of the children and her clients at the forefront when advocating on their behalf.  Kelli is originally from South Carolina but enjoyed her undergrad years in the mountains of North Carolina at Western Carolina University where she majored in Business Law.  After graduation, Kelli headed west to the University of Tulsa College of Law where she worked on her first family law cases as a student with the Boesche Legal Clinic, and later as a Licensed Legal Intern at a family law firm.  Kelli was admitted to practice in Florida and began her legal career with Children's Legal Services of the Florida Department of Children and Families, advocating for abused and neglected children.  Kelli and her family relocated back to North Carolina in 2009 and refocused her practice on serving families here in the triangle area. When not assisting clients, Kelli serves as a volunteer Guardian ad Litem with District 11, being the voice of children who are abused, neglected, or dependent.  As a board member of the Cleveland Area Backpack Buddies, she is privileged to work with an outstanding group of volunteers and area elementary schools to alleviate the needs of food-insecure children and families in her community.  At the heart of all Kelli does, are her four daughters.  She and her husband enjoy cheering them on in all that they do and spending time together as a family. We discuss what to expect when you first reach out to a lawyer. It's important to remember that you can turn back, it doesn't mean you have to get separated or divorced but you can get all the info you need to make an informed decision. Often times people see us after getting separated and don't have the benefit of the advice we could have offered before taking some actions. We discuss the importance of not just googling for information or relying on what a friend learned from their divorce because the information may get lost in translation or not be applicable to your case.     Help your friends who may be going through a divorce go from victim to victorious and bitter to better.If you like The Ex-it Strategy, visit our website to subscribe free and you'll never miss an episode. And if you really like the Ex-it Strategy, We'd appreciate you telling a friend (maybe even two). 

    Domestic Abuse: Identifying, Getting Help and Providing Support (Part 2)

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 21, 2022 17:12


    In this episode Tasha Sullivan, MSW – Senior Director of Domestic Violence Services talks about what InterAct is and how it can help people who find themselves in an abusive relationship. InterAct is the only provider of domestic violence and sexual assault services in Wake County, North Carolina - saving lives, rebuilding lives, and securing safer futures for individuals and families in our community. Tasha started at InterAct as a volunteer and has now been there for over 15 years. Everyone can be affected by domestic violence, it does not discriminate. InterAct has multiple 24-hour programs and they are most busy in the middle of the night.  Tasha talks about all the programs that InterAct offers to the community: InterAct's three 24-hour crisis lines serve as lifelines for victims and survivors of domestic and sexual violence who need to take immediate steps toward achieving safety. InterAct has a full-time presence in each of Wake County's two domestic violence courtrooms. Additionally, victims of domestic violence can electronically file for a domestic violence protective order at InterAct. InterAct provides individual counseling, case management, and support to victims and survivors of rape and sexual assault.  InterAct's Emergency Shelter Program serves as a “home away from home” for Wake County families who have experienced domestic violence and need emergency shelter.   Mentioned in this episode:If you're interested in volunteering all the opportunities are listed on the website. Help your friends who may be going through a divorce go from victim to victorious and bitter to better.If you like The Ex-it Strategy, visit our website to subscribe free and you'll never miss an episode. And if you really like the Ex-it Strategy, We'd appreciate you telling a friend (maybe even two). 

    Domestic Abuse: Identifying, Getting Help and Providing Support (Part 1)

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 7, 2022 29:48


    In this episode Today's guest is Ryan Kelly, MSW, Associate Director of Victim Services from InterAct. Ryan shares about her role and InterAct and how she helps survivors of domestic abuse. Ryan shares about the ways domestic violence shows up in relationships, physical abuse is often only one piece of the problem. She breaks down the power and control wheel that is taking control over their partner. Do you feel like you have the autonomy to do what you want to do and feel safe? This is a good gauge to identify if you are in an abusive relationship. We highlight how domestic violence does not discriminate against race, sex, or socioeconomics. We talk about what to look for in relationships that could be red flags of domestic abuse: Does it progress quickly You see an attack on autonomy The perpetrator attacks healthy relationships in the survivor Ending a relationship with an abusive partner can be dangerous. We need to become better at listening because people in an abusive relationship may not directly disclose abuse. We also need to get better at believing people when they disclose abuse and not find excuses for abusive behavior. You don't need to know the truth to support someone, often asking questions about the nature of the abuse can cause the survivor to feel like you are victim-blaming. The National Coalition to Against Domestic Violence estimates about 10 million men and women in the United States experience intimate partner violence per year.  The pandemic exasperated the instances of domestic abuse. The good news is that a lot of people transition successfully from being victims to survivors.  Mentioned in this episode:If you're interested in volunteering at InterAct all the opportunities are listed on the website. Help your friends who may be going through a divorce go from victim to victorious and bitter to better.If you like The Ex-it Strategy, visit our website to subscribe free and you'll never miss an episode. And if you really like the Ex-it Strategy, We'd appreciate you telling a friend (maybe even two). 

    How to Effectively Communicate with a Hostile Ex

    Play Episode Listen Later May 10, 2022 27:54


    In this episode Lepage Associates is home to a highly experienced team of experts dedicated to helping you with your concerns.  They recognize that when people seek a psychologist, therapy, or psychiatric services, they are experiencing a problem they would like solved.  By the time you start to think about seeking a mental health service, you have likely tried at least some alternatives, and those have not improved the situation to your satisfaction or given you the answers you seek. BIFF: Quick Responses to High Conflict People, Their Hostile Emails, Personal Attacks, and Social Media Meltdowns Dr. Lepage gives an overview of what her practice does. We talk about ways to communicate with ex-spouses that are not disruptive to co-parenting. "Brief" is a really good communication style to learn.  The more irritated or agitated we are, the harder it is to be our best selves as a parent that day. So to the extent, we can keep boundaries in our own lives and not jump into these pools of hostility when we don't have to, it's not only great for our own mental health, but it's great for our parenting. Rules for effective communication Always ask, "Do I need to reply to this at all?" Leave out the three "A's" Advice Admonishments Apologies Mentioned in this episode: Articles and Podcasts mentioned  The High Conflict Institute Help your friends who may be going through a divorce go from victim to victorious and bitter to better.If you like The Ex-it Strategy, visit our website to subscribe free and you'll never miss an episode. And if you really like the Ex-it Strategy, We'd appreciate you telling a friend (maybe even two). 

    Does an open marriage need a prenup?

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 19, 2022 33:42


    In this episode We talk about the Will Smith and Chris Rock drama, and how Will's marriage is well known as a non-traditional or open marriage. We share about open marriage stories we've heard as lawyers. We are great at drafting contracts, if you'd like a non-traditional marriage agreement reach out to us. What percentage of marriages are open? Less than 1%. What percentage of open marriages end in divorce? 92% In North Carolina, the Paramore can get in trouble by two claims: Alienation of Affection and Criminal Conversation. Criminal conversation is basically the simple fact that you had sex with a married person. Alienation of Affection is basically you have interfered in this relationship, this marriage, and had an affair with the person and caused them to leave their spouse. Most of these claims typically settle instead of going to trial, generally, they're used as a negotiation point. Help your friends who may be going through a divorce go from victim to victorious and bitter to better.If you like The Ex-it Strategy, visit our website to subscribe free and you'll never miss an episode. And if you really like the Ex-it Strategy, We'd appreciate you telling a friend (maybe even two). 

    Giving Grace and Growing Resilience

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 5, 2022 29:10


    In this episode SAFEchild stands for Stop Abuse For Every Child and is a Wake County organization that offers a full range of child abuse prevention and intervention services to children and families at no cost.  Cristin DeRonja, SAFEchild's executive director since 2015, joined the organization in 2004 and has served many roles. She has worked with first-time moms as a mentor for SAFEchild's Welcome Baby program, drawn upon her family systems training as a program facilitator for several SAFEchild parenting groups, including the Nurturing Program and PLUS, and presented the Funny Tummy Feelings program in schools to first graders.  Cristin was instrumental in establishing the SAFEchild Advocacy Center in 2010 and achieving SAFEchild's National Accreditation in 2017. Cristin shares about the services offered to parents both victims and abusers that focus on stopping the cycle of abuse and rehabilitation. Some of the biggest protective factors that decrease child maltreatment is having positive social connections.We discuss how COVID has impacted SAFEchild over the past few years. It is very easy to access the services of SAFEchild by visiting their website and filling out the intake form. They offer free parenting classes, medical evaluations, and more. Cristin offers advice to parents: "You don' need to have all the answers yourself. Knowledge is power."    In This Episode:  SAFEchild - Eliminate Abuse & Empower Families The ACES Ted Talk - How childhood trauma affects health across a lifetime | Nadine Burke Harris Help your friends who may be going through a divorce go from victim to victorious and bitter to better.If you like The Ex-it Strategy, visit our website to subscribe free and you'll never miss an episode. And if you really like the Ex-it Strategy, We'd appreciate you telling a friend (maybe even two). 

    You Got Served

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 22, 2022 30:45


    In this episode Jamie comes back onto the show for a second time.  Jamie is a private investigator that works for Blackman Detective Services.  We talk about serving papers and how important it is to keep a case moving in the court system.  We talk about the different levels of serving people that private detectives take, but that doesn't always work smoothly so they have to find the person and hand the papers to them personally.  PI's have even used newspaper ads to find hard-to-find people. Jamie shares some funny stories of times when people were being difficult that are sure to make you laugh.    In This Episode:  blackmenpi.com  Call them at 919-821-0016 Help your friends who may be going through a divorce go from victim to victorious and bitter to better.If you like The Ex-it Strategy, visit our website to subscribe free and you'll never miss an episode. And if you really like the Ex-it Strategy, We'd appreciate you telling a friend (maybe even two). 

    Super Lawyer Answers to Frequently Asked Questions

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 8, 2022 33:33


    In this episode, Elizabeth and Sarah provide answers to some of the most frequently asked questions regarding North Carolina divorce law. Some of these questions include:  Do you really have to be separated a year to file for divorce? What if the other party will not leave your home? Do you have to have a separation agreement or court order to be legally separated?  Why is the day of separation so important? Can you and your spouse use the same divorce attorney? What is the difference between legal and physical custody? What does the court look at when determining custody? Why do I have to provide so much financial information to my attorney and the other side? Help your friends who may be going through a divorce go from victim to victorious and bitter to better.If you like The Ex-it Strategy, visit our website to subscribe free and you'll never miss an episode. And if you really like the Ex-it Strategy, We'd appreciate you telling a friend (maybe even two). 

    Getting Under to Get Over: When to Start Dating Again

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 15, 2022 26:09


        In This Episode:  Infidelity relationships outside of the marriage account for almost 60% of separation and divorces. This episode airs the day after Valentine's Day 2022, so happy valentines day! How soon can you date:At least wait until you're separated, (legally, not just a verbal agreement) When you're separated in NC, you have to be separated for a year and a day before you can get divorced. We talk about all the issues that can come up from dating during your separation. We discuss some of North Carolina's outdated laws. We suggest not talking about your dating, separation, or divorce on social media. Consider not introducing the person you are dating to your children until they have time to heal and adjust from the divorce. Elizabeth talks about the four-seasons rule. This means being with someone with all four seasons to get to know them more completely. We talk about how judges consider common arguments given by people going through a divorce when it comes to dating, kids, and co-parenting agreements. If you're still in the middle of custody issues and you still got a custody trial come. For sure, that girlfriend or boyfriend is going to be subpoenaed to come and testify at court. And they're going to get all their documents subpoenaed until you're just making it even more difficult. Help your friends who may be going through a divorce go from victim to victorious and bitter to better.If you like The Ex-it Strategy, visit our website to subscribe free and you'll never miss an episode. And if you really like the Ex-it Strategy, We'd appreciate you telling a friend (maybe even two). 

    Divorcing in a Pandemic

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 7, 2021 47:59


        In This Episode:  During the pandemic there has been an increase in domestic violence. We have to protect people in violent relationships. That's something we've observed just as family law enterprise.  We also talk about coming out of the pandemic (we hope), and what we've learned just in our practice, people staying at home together. Did it make their situation better or worse? What do you do when you and your spouse or ex have different opinions on vaccinations, even before the pandemic? How has covid changed the dating environment for people who have gone through separation/divorce, and now they find themselves getting back in the playing field. COVID has complicated dating for sure. That's why our job is challenging sometimes is that people are on different ends of the spectrum and can't find a middle ground and if it becomes a legal issue like a separation or custody agreement, it can be difficult to navigate those challenges without some outside help, especially when people find themselves at an impasse or tend to bring out the worst in each other. We talk through  the crazy housing market and how to deal with that. Some couples may not be able to afford to purchase two new places either financially or because of availability and find themselves faced with learning how to live together with their ex. Our job, as your attorney, is to let you live your life and parent your children. We get to be the bitch. We get to determine when to talk to the other party.  Our job is to get you out of this mess and let you work on yourself. We discuss whether we feel that virtual mediations are still as effective as in-person mediations were pre-COVID or do they have their advantages or disadvantages? Question: Have you  seen or heard a lot of people that just feel like right now it's too expensive to get divorced with some of the stuff that happened with COVID? Help your friends who may be going through a divorce go from victim to victorious and bitter to better.If you like The Ex-it Strategy, visit our website to subscribe free and you'll never miss an episode. And if you really like the Ex-it Strategy, We'd appreciate you telling a friend (maybe even two). 

    Save the Holiday Drama for Your mama

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 23, 2021 22:34


        In This Episode:  We talk about custody issues that come up during the holidays. What to do and what to avoid if you're dealing with a contentious or congenial custody dispute this holiday season. When thinking about your custody agreement this season it's important to think long term: think about what's important to you, what traditions you want to have going forward. We discuss some other do's and don'ts about the holidays. Issues like don't drink too much when you have your kid because it may be something that makes its way into court or your custody agreement. Your feelings through the holidays are valid, whether you are single or divorced.  Over this holiday season, take care of yourself. Invest in your self-care, take a hot bath. But, especially if you're going through the separation process and there's litigation. Watch yourself and don't do anything that is in the heat of your emotions that could blow up everything regarding a custody agreement. Change takes time for people to adapt and just be careful going through the holidays and recognizing that for your kid's state of mind as well. And please give yourself some grace. This isn't easy stuff to go through. People celebrate and grieve and they do things for themselves in different ways. So you just find what works for you. Links To Things I Talk About:  Mariah Carey ad with the pumpkins Blue Christmas by Elvis Presley Help your friends who may be going through a divorce go from victim to victorious and bitter to better.If you like The Ex-it Strategy, visit our website to subscribe free and you'll never miss an episode. And if you really like the Ex-it Strategy, We'd appreciate you telling a friend (maybe even two). 

    Custody Schedules: How Bitter are You?

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 9, 2021 39:04


        In This Episode:  There are all sorts of ways to handle custody agreements. In the best-case scenario, we would hopefully be able to resolve custody with some sort of parenting agreement or separation agreement. How do you enforce a contract? First of all, what do you need to have a contract? You need two reasonable people, even though they both have a position they want, are willing to (not necessarily meet in the middle) but compromise.  We talk about the differences between a parenting agreement and a separation agreement. There is not a template for custody. People have different needs specific to their family, different temperaments, what is important to them, mental health issues, etc. We discuss what happens when one party breaches the contract.  Who controls the decisions for your children, especially when it affects the other parent? What are ways to navigate these issues? We discuss what terms you can include in your custody or separation agreements. What happens when your ex starts to date? Can you control whether or not they bring their significant others around your children? The answer might surprise you. If you came into contact with certain issues in your marriage it is likely that similar or the same issues will show up in your co-parenting relationship.  We talk about the role of parenting coordinators and their role in separation agreements and parenting agreements. We discuss what a court order is and how it can be useful when people don't hold up their end of the agreement. It's important to document issues that come up with your custody arrangement with your spouse, keep good factual records not a record of your feelings. "You call your friends you text your ex."  Links To Things I Talk About:  The origin of the phrase "Mind your Ps and Qs." If you're listening and you think you might need a parenting agreement or can, or it's all issues, separation agreement, then, talk to your attorney or us. Or if there are issues already with co-parenting really consider doing a custody consent order. Help your friends who may be going through a divorce go from victim to victorious and bitter to better.If you like The Ex-it Strategy, visit our website to subscribe free and you'll never miss an episode. And if you really like the Ex-it Strategy, We'd appreciate you telling a friend (maybe even two). 

    Mom Life with Special Guest Fizzy

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 12, 2021 38:53


    Today's guest is Fizzy she is the Senior Paralegal and Operations Manager at New Direction Family Law. What started her love for family law was Fizzy's own experiences as a victim and survivor of domestic violence and her experience with custody battles and working with the court system. This also gives her another level of empathy that she is able to use to help her clients. Fizzy talks about how hard it is being a single mom and how some people wish that the other parent would disappear but she does not wish that on anyone. Fizzy talks about the importance of community and the community that she found were the moms of her son's friends. Fizzy talks about how one of the hardest things about being a single mom in her situation is being able to help her son emotionally when it comes to the complicated relationship with the father and navigating whether or not he wants a relationship with him. Fizzy talks to people who are currently stuck in domestic violence and how they can get out and there is light on the other side of the tunnel. As Fizzy's son is growing up she now has to navigate the world of teaching her son how to be respectful and kind especially when it comes to dating. They all talk about the importance of seeing a mental health professional and how to get over the things that are holding you back from receiving help for you and your child. Fizzy talks about how her child is biracial and the talks that she has had to have with him and how him growing up is a lot different from the way she got to grow up but he has found coaches to help mentor him. Fizzy's best advice for single parents is to make a plan and to stick to that plan so that they can be prepared.

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