Podcast appearances and mentions of Ted Knight

"The Mary Tyler Moore Show" is a  sitcom that aired on CBS from 1970 to 1977. The show starred Mary Tyler Moore as Mary Richards, a single, independent woman working as a TV news producer in Minneapolis. More than a workplace comedy, it helped reshape how America viewed women in the 1970. The show was gigantic success winning over both critics and viewers alike. In its run "The Mary Tyler Moore Show" won a total of 29 Emmys. Will the S1E1 boys make this one a green-light after all? Listen as they deep dive the show's pilot episode, "Love Is All Around". Starring: Mary Tyler Moore, Ed Asner, Gavin MacLeod, Ted Knight, Cloris Leachman, Valerie Harper, Angus Duncan, & Lisa Gerritsen www.S1E1POD.com Instagram & X (Twitter): @S1E1POD

This Week on Earth Station DCU! Drew Leiter and Cletus Jacobs are attending a perfectly good wedding. Poison Ivy and Swamp Thing investigate a mysterious disturbance in the Green—something is wrong with the trees, and a presence is screaming out in pain, leaving behind a trail of carnage in Poison Ivy/Swamp Thing: Feral Trees #1. Gotham is plunged into chaos as Ra's al Ghul arrives, forcing Batman to turn to unlikely allies—including his Rogues Gallery—to save the city. Meanwhile, the Justice League faces an existential crisis as Brainiac warns them of the impending arrival of the Anti-Monitor in Batman: Dark Ages #5 & 6. When a deadly group of assassins known as the Unburied targets Batgirl Cassandra Cain, Lady Shiva intervenes, forcing Cassandra to work alongside her estranged mother in Batgirl #1,2, and 3. the JSA investigates a break-in at the observatory of Ted Knight, the original Starman only to discover evidence of the Injustice Society of America and that some JSA members have gone missing in JSA #1, 2, and 3. All this plus, DC News, Shout Outs, and much, much more! ------------------------ Table of Contents 0:00:00 Show Open 0:00:58 DC News 0:09:36 Poison Ivy/Swamp Thing: Feral Trees #1 0:13:25 Batman: Dark Age #5 & 6 0:18:28 Batgirl #1, 2, 3 0:22:26 JSA #1, 2, 3 0:28:22 Superman S4 Ep4 – A Perfectly Good Wedding 0:49:48 Show Close   Links Poison Ivy/Swamp Thing: Feral Trees #1 Batman: Dark Age #5 Batman: Dark Age #6 Batgirl #1 Batgirl #2 Batgirl #3 JSA #1 JSA #2 JSA #3 Swamp Thing #47 (Cletus's Read More Comics Pick) Superman: The Wedding Album #1 Earth Station DCU Website Earth Station DCU/BatChums Patreon The ESO Network If you would like to leave feedback, comment on the show, or would like us to give you a shout out, please call the ESDCU feedback line at (317) 455-8411 or feel free to email us @ earthstationdcu@gmail.com

Dana and Tom with returning guest, Joe Boukhari (Instagram - I'll Get to It When I Get to It; Letterboxd Film Commentator - @bagodonuts) revisit Caddyshack (1980): written and directed by Harold Ramis with Douglas Kenney and Brian Doyle Murray, music by Johnny Mandel, cinematography by Stevan Larner, starring Chevy Chase, Ted Knight, Rodney Dangerfield, and Bill Murray.Plot Summary: Bushwood Country Club: an opulent haven for the wealthy, where life revolves around pristine greens, exclusivity, and egos so inflated they could double as golf carts. But underneath the facade of luxury lies a clash of worlds—working-class caddies and eccentric groundskeepers versus snobby elites—and it's about to get hilariously out of control.Danny Noonan (Michael O'Keefe), a young caddy striving to secure his future, finds himself entangled in the club's tangled hierarchy, navigating manipulative judges, raucous millionaires, and life lessons from Ty Webb (Chevy Chase), a laid-back golfer with pearls of wisdom that sound like they came from a Zen koan written by Groucho Marx. Meanwhile, Carl Spackler (Bill Murray), the quirky groundskeeper, engages in an escalating war with a gopher so cunning it could win a philosophy debate.Add in Al Czervik (Rodney Dangerfield), whose outlandish behavior becomes a catalyst for chaos, and Bushwood transforms into the backdrop for a wild satire of class division, absurd ambition, and the universal search for meaning—through golf, naturally. The result? A comedy that skewers pretense and celebrates the unpredictability of life, all while leaving the audience wondering how a gopher became the most unstoppable force in the universe.Chapters:00:00 Introduction and Welcome Back, Joe Boukhari02:42 Cast and Background for Caddyshack06:19 Relationship(s) with Caddyshack09:12 What is Caddyshack About?13:54 Status of Comedy in Film24:48 Plot Summary for Caddyshack26:36 Did You Know?28:29 First Break29:26 What's Up with Joe Boukhari?32:02 The Stanley Rubric - Legacy45:03 The Stanley Rubric - Impact/Significance50:33 The Stanley Rubric - Novelty57:52 Second Break58:33 The Stanley Rubric - Classicness01:04:54 The Stanley Rubric - Rewatchability01:09:27 The Stanley Rubric - Audience Score and Final Total01:11:28 Remaining Questions for Caddyshack01:14:44 Thank You to Joe Boukhari and Remaining Thoughts01:18:17 CreditsGuest:Joe BoukhariInstagram - I'll Get to It When I Get to ItLetterboxd Film Commentator - @bagodonutsYou can also find this episode in full video on YouTube.You can now follow us on Instagram, Twitter, YouTube, or TikTok (@gmoatpodcast).For more on the original episode, go to: https://www.ronnyduncanstudios.com/post/caddyshack-1980For more on the episode, go to:

OK, with golf season fully underway, it's time to salute Caddyshack, one of the classic 1980s comedy that featured the directorial debut of Harold Ramis, the big screen breakthrough for Rodney Dangerfield, some arrogant Ted Knight, some crazed Bill Murray and a lineage that drew heavily from both Saturday Night Live and the National Lampoon. Don't worry too much about the plot -- it's merely a launchpad for comedy bits galore. Whether you're a hacker, a duffer, or a scratch golfer, Caddyshack has something for you. And if you are a real big fan, you can watch it wearing your "William Murray" golf gear and finish with a pint at the "Murray Brothers Caddyshack Restaurant" (yes it's real). As always, find extra clips below and thanks for sharing our shows. Want more Caddyshack? Bill Murray has had far larger roles over time, but he makes the most of his Caddyshack persona Carl Spackler, a groundskeeper who is just a little, shall we say, disturbed. https://youtu.be/X48G7Y0VWW4?si=QGiCSvUEMJQYbGRo Chevy Chase has never been better than as Ty Webb, a pro-level golfer who smirks his way through life. Here are some of Chevy's best bits. https://youtu.be/Al3Yt5gxExY?si=CwIlxkEJFpXJIbTG Rodney Dangerfield was the perfect choice to play Al Czervik, a loud, crass, and hilarious "slob" dropped in the middle of a bunch of country club "snobs". Here Al tries to goad the arrogant Judge Smalls (a brilliant Ted Knight) into a slice. https://youtu.be/RrOhjHC28PQ?si=MFzVjclP0mKa6fxi

Gio hosted a "Newlywed Game" between Al & Eddie to test their 17-year camaraderie. Before C-Lo's final update (following a discussion about the afternoon show requesting, not being invited to, the Islanders game), they recapped the Knicks' Detroit loss (featuring Kenny Albert's call) and Jim Nantz's story of acquiring Scottie Scheffler's old Yukon. A funny call to the Paul Feinbaum show involved a bowel movement discussion. The "Moment of the Day" questioned the show members' true knowledge of each other. The week ended with Gio receiving Barstool Golf merchandise (noting their high-stakes staff contests) and a discussion about Ted Knight's age in "Caddyshack" and his "Too Close For Comfort" role.

Hour 1 Today on Gio & Jerry (Boomer's out): Gio polled Jerry, Al, and Eddie for their Top 5 NY announcers. Before C-Lo's sports update (starting with his own Top 5), they discussed the Knicks' loss in Detroit (starters rested) and Wally Szczerbiak's post-game comments (featuring Al's "Boring" drops). C-Lo then covered the Masters' first day, including Gary Player's new girlfriend (he's 90) and amateur Jose Luis's creek incident. The hour ended with Gio noticing Jerry looking at Arizona real estate and a discussion about the time commitment of kids' athletics. Hour 2 Playoff Knicks opponents were discussed. The Mets and Yankees had recent afternoon games, making it feel like a long break. A caller questioned if the show is more relaxed without Boomer; Gio noted he sometimes avoids topics Boomer dislikes. They pondered how well the show members know each other (like a "Newlywed" game). C-Lo returned for his update, finding they don't know his kids' names. Kenny Albert reported on a Knicks-Pistons scuffle. At the Masters, Justin Thomas cursed after a bad shot, and Al questioned the free Masters app's extensive live coverage. The afternoon show went to the Islanders game where the Rangers scored 9 goals. The hour ended with Gio saying he'd be golfer Ludvig Aberg if he could wake up as any athlete. Hour 3 Gio debates drafting QB Jalen Milroe. He suggests drafting LB Abdul Carter for immediate impact, then Milroe later, emphasizing the Giants need wins and a QB plan for Daboll/Schoen to stay. Jerry prefers Sanders for his media handling skills and expects better Giants QB play than the Jets (despite no Jets QB draft talk). Before C-Lo's update, they discussed their guest bartending for the Boomer Esiason Foundation. C-Lo's update included the Knicks' physical loss to the Pistons, Masters day one, and Augusta's female members. The hour ended with the Browns signing Joe Flacco to their QB room with Kenny Pickett. Hour 4 Gio hosted a "Newlywed Game" between Al & Eddie to test their 17-year camaraderie. Before C-Lo's final update (following a discussion about the afternoon show requesting, not being invited to, the Islanders game), they recapped the Knicks' Detroit loss (featuring Kenny Albert's call) and Jim Nantz's story of acquiring Scottie Scheffler's old Yukon. A funny call to the Paul Feinbaum show involved a bowel movement discussion. The "Moment of the Day" questioned the show members' true knowledge of each other. The week ended with Gio receiving Barstool Golf merchandise (noting their high-stakes staff contests) and a discussion about Ted Knight's age in "Caddyshack" and his "Too Close For Comfort" role.

In 1978, after Harold Ramis wrapped "Animal House", the director teamed up with pals Brian Doyle-Murray and Douglas Kenney, along with Chevy Chase, Bill Murray, Ted Knight, and the one and only, Rodney Dangerfield, to bring similar frathouse shenanigans to the clubhouse. Featuring legendary performances (many of which were completely improvised) plus an equally memorable soundtrack, this 80s flick came barreling into theaters the summer of 1980, and went on to become one of the most cherished comedies of all time. Widely considered to be one of the all-time funniest comedies ever assembled, the film about a young golf caddy (Michael O'Keefe) desperate to win a scholarship and turn his life around has been listed #71 on AFI's 100 Years...100 Laughs and #7 on AFI's Top 10 Sports Films. So grab your golf clubs, watch out for gopher holes, and remember to be the ball as Tim Williams and guest co-hosts, Nicolas Pepin and Chris McMichen discuss “Caddyshack” from 1980 on this episode of the 80s Flick Flashback Podcast.Here are some additional behind-the-scenes trivia we were unable to cover in this episode:Cindy Morgan revealed that the oil massage scene with Chevy Chase was entirely improvised. When Lacy exclaims, "You're crazy!" that was Morgan's authentic reaction to Chase dousing her with oil, which was also the case with Chase's reply, "That's what they said about the Son Of Sam.”Writer and producer Douglas Kenney died after the film was released. He fell off a cliff while vacationing in Hawaii. Kenney had experienced deep depression after the film's post-production, as much of the original story had been significantly altered in the editing room, and he was strongly opposed to the final addition of the gopher to the film.Sources:Wikipedia, IMDB, Box Office Mojohttps://www.mentalfloss.com/article/56693/15-things-you-might-not-know-about-caddyshackhttps://screenrant.com/caddyshack-movie-behind-scenes-making-of-trivia/Some sections were composed or edited by ChatGPT We'd love to hear your thoughts on our podcast! You can share your feedback with us via email or social media. Your opinions are incredibly valuable to us, and we'd be so grateful to know what you enjoyed about our show. If we missed anything or if you have any suggestions for 80s movies, we'd love to hear them too! If you're feeling extra supportive, you can even become a subscription member through "Buy Me A Coffee". For more details and other fun extensions of our podcast, check out this link. Thank you for your support!https://linktr.ee/80sFlickFlashback

Pearl Harbor Remembrance day. Entertainment from 2003. Deleware became the 1st state, Jet stream discovered, 1st instant replay used, 1st execution by lethal injection. Todays birthdays - Clarence Nash, Ted Knight, Ellen Burstyn, Harry Chapin, Gary Mooris, C, Thomas Howell, Sara Bareilles. Chuck Yeager died.Intro - Pour some sugar on me - Def Leppard http://defleppard.com/Stand up - Lucacris feat. ShawnaI love this bar - Taby KeithBirthday - The BeatlesBirthdays - In da club - 50 Cent http://50cent.com/Donald Duck theme songI'm alright - Kenny LogginsCats in the cradle - Harry ChapinBaby bye bye - Gary MorrisLove song - Sara BareillesExit - It's not love - Dokken http://dokken.net/

Send us a textJoin former child star r, and author, Jonathan Rosen, as the chat with cousin Oliver from The Brady Bunch, Robbie Rist!Robbie discusses his time as Cousin Oliver on the iconic series, playing Ted Knight's son on The Mary Tyler Moore Show, doing the voice for Michelangelo in the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles movies, & much more! Support the show

Send us a textJoin former child star r, and author, Jonathan Rosen, as the chat with cousin Oliver from The Brady Bunch, Robbie Rist!Robbie discusses his time as Cousin Oliver on the iconic series, playing Ted Knight's son on The Mary Tyler Moore Show, doing the voice for Michelangelo in the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles movies, & much more! Support the show

GGACP celebrates the birthday of Emmy-winning actor Ed Asner (b. November 15, 1929) with this ENCORE presentation of an in-depth interview from 2015. In this episode, Ed talks about his early days in the business, his seven memorable seasons as the irascible Lou Grant on “The Mary Tyler Moore Show” and his roles in hugely popular films like “Elf” and Pixar's “Up.” Also, Ed meets Elvis, co-stars with Edward G. Robinson, beats up Jack Lemmon and lusts after Cloris Leachman. PLUS: Sam Jaffe! Michael Cole! “The Duke” names names! The comic genius of Ted Knight! And Ed dishes dirt on Santa Claus! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Lydia Cornell is an AFI Best Actress nominee and People's Choice Award winner, international star of over 250 TV shows and films, best known as the star of ABC's hit series Too Close For Comfort as TV legend Ted Knight's daughter, Sara Rush. One of the most popular sex symbols on TV, she is now a mother, author, teen mentor, talk show host, comedienne, producer, director, and award-winning writer. Too Close for Comfort can currently be seen four times a week on Antenna TV, Tribune Broadcasting. Check out her podcast "GodShots: True Stories of Synchronicity" on YouTube and everywhere you listen. Good Things Are Happening is sponsored by Surfshark! Get a deal at https://get.surfshark.net/SH3q3  Listen to the conversation, get some good news, and get some inspiration with the guys on Good Things Are Happening. Visit us on the web at https://www.goodthingspod.com/

“Katie and I, our relationship could be a little exciting -- I had to watch my step, I had to toe the line. I had to behave myself or I'd get taken to the principal's office... And she was the principal.” -- Bruce BoxleitnerIn Part Two of their conversation, Bruce reflects on the differences between doing TV then and now, his relationship with Kate Jackson -- and how the long hours can sometimes turn your co-stars into your family…Bruce Boxleitner's television career started way back in 1973 with an appearance on The Mary Tyler Moore Show and he has since appeared in over 100 films and TV shows including Gunsmoke, Baretta, Police Woman, Hawaii 5-0, Babylon 5, Crossing Jordan, Commander in Chief, American Dad, Cold Case, Heroes, Chuck, NCIS, Supergirl, The Orville, When Calls The Heart, How The West Was Won, Bring ‘Em Back Alive, The Gambler and Tron.THE CONVERSATIONTHE UGLY SIDE OF LEE STETSON: When Lee slaps Amanda in “Burn Out” (S2; EP.21) What was going on? --  “Kate said, “Hit me.” It was no fun. I didn't enjoy doing it at all.”ON THE JAZZ: In Europe, Mel Stuart -- a saxophonist -- fell in with some local jazz musicians and ended up sitting-in in clubs all over Munich.DOUBLE TROUBLE: Bruce finds out the strange reason his stunt double Gary Davis did the pilot's helicopter stunts with no safety cable!On doing network TV: “This is where I come off sounding like a grumpy old man, but in my day, we had fun. Nobody is having fun anymore. Because we have cell phones on the set, everyone's on their cell phone. No one's talking.”WHO CAN TURN THE WORLD ON WITH HIS SMILE? Bruce got his first gig on The Mary Tyler Moore Show because the producer owed his agent a favor.On doing a streaming series: “I'm doing a series now -- six episodes. They call that a series? I call it a two-parter.”Bruce gets a surprise walking onto the Gunsmoke set when he discovers the entire town is built inside a soundstage.On filming pilots: “George Clooney says he's the king of the unsold pilots. Well, buddy, I'm the runner-up!”While shooting The Orville, Bruce finds out that the biggest SMK fan… is Seth McFarlane!How do you marry Lee and Amanda? Should you marry Lee and Amanda?So, join Susan and Sharon -- and Bruce -- as they talk How The West Was Won, Ted Knight, Tron, Juanita Bartlett, Susan Diol, Police Woman, and pranking Martha Smith -- and Kate Jackson -- AND Beverly Garland… and the sad, tragic life of “Dean, the Boyfriend”!AUDIO-OGRAPHYFind out more about Bruce Boxleitner at Facebook.comFollow him at Instagram.com/BoxleitnerBruceFollow him at Twitter.com/BoxleitnerBruceCatch him on Cameo at Cameo.com/BoxleitnerBruceWatch S2, Ep. 21: Burn out on TubiGet The Ultimate Fan's Guide to Scarecrow & Mrs. King by David Johnson, Taya Johnston and Sabine Ludewig at Amazon. CONNECTVisit 80sTVLadies.com for transcripts.Sign up for the 80s TV Ladies mailing list.Support us and get ad-free episodes on PATREON.We're a 2024 Podcast Award Winner! We WON for Best Film & TV. Thank you everyone who voted!VOTEREMEMBER: Register or Check your US Election Registration at Vote.orgMake a plan to Vote. Check out Ballot Ready.This year is the 45th anniversary of President Carter's Crisis of Confidence speech. Read Susan's new play about the speech and the confidence it takes to be president in challenging times: Confidence (and the Speech) at Broadway Licensing.

GGACP bids a fond farewell to our late friend and 2-time guest, “Good Times” and “Roots” star John Amos by revisiting this memorable interview from 2016. In this episode, John reminisces about everything from his days as a struggling comic to his breakthrough role on “The Mary Tyler Moore Show” to working with Eddie Murphy and James Earl Jones in “Coming to America.” Also, John remembers Ted Knight, cuts up with Tim Conway, shares the screen with Lena Horne and moves into Archie Bunker's old house. PLUS: Famous Amos! The cinema of Yaphet Kotto! “The Treasure of the Sierra Madre”! Praising Ernest Borgnine! And the mystery of the misheard theme song! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Is Caddyshack a golf movie or a movie about people that happen to be at a country club? Either way with comedic heavy hitters Rodney Dangerfield, Bill Murray, Chevy Chase, Ted Knight, and more, this movie is carried more by its personal rivalries and improvisational humor than it is about approach shots and two-putts. And the story behind how they filmed its explosive finale is as badass as it gets. Must listen. Subscribe to the podcast free on your preferred app and please tell a friend who loves movies about the show, just tell em to look up "Just Like the Movies" on any podcast app! Thank you for listening and as always remember to be kind, rewind, relax, and enjoy the show.

"Playing A Round Of Golf At The Bushwood Club Isn't Just Confined To The Golf Course!" For the final episode of our "Summer at the Cinema Series" we are discussing the sports comedy classic 'Caddyshack.' The movie stars Chevy Chase, Rodney Dangerfield, Bill Murray, Ted Knight, Michael O'Keefe and Cindy Morgan. It was co-written and directed by Harold Ramis. Caddyshack - IMDB: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0080487/?ref_=nv_sr_srsg_0_tt_7_nm_1_in_0_q_caddysh Caddyshack - Rotten Tomatoes: https://www.rottentomatoes.com/m/caddyshack Bill's Letterboxd Ratings: https://letterboxd.com/bill_b/list/bills-all-80s-movies-podcast-ratings/ Jason's Letterboxd Ratings: https://letterboxd.com/jasonmasek/list/jasons-all-80s-movies-podcast-ratings/ Website: http://www.all80smoviespodcast.com X (Twitter): https://twitter.com/podcastAll80s Facebook (META): https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100030791216864 TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@all80smoviespodcast Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

FARM ANIMALS & HUGHIE'S DAD ATTACK!! The Boys Season 4 Full Reaction Watch Along: https://www.patreon.com/thereelrejects "Beware The Jabberwock, My Son." The Boys Season 4 Reaction, Recap, Commentary, Analysis, Spoiler Review, Easter Eggs, & Ending Explained! We get the Gen V crossover with Cate & Sam as well as Ted Knight and Hughie Sr. getting Supers powers leading to a Simon Pegg death scene. The episode's bizarre plot centers around a lab run by Victoria Neumann, where her ex-boyfriend experiments with a Supe-killing virus. This leads to an unexpected confrontation with superpowered livestock—buffalos, sheep, and chickens—injecting even more madness into the storyline…but not before getting a parody of Marvel & DC panels at comic-con with their Vought announcement slate! The episode kicks off with The Boys infiltrating Victoria Neumann's secret lab, aiming to steal the Gen V virus, a dangerous bioweapon. Things go awry when the infected animals break free, attacking everyone in sight. Victoria threatens to blow up The Boys and Stan Edgar, who is temporarily out of prison, but her hesitation leads to a wild chase. Amidst the chaos, we see Butcher, MM, Frenchie, and Stan scrambling to escape the superpowered animals. The tension escalates when Victoria, Kimiko, and Starlight, despite their powers, fail to effectively counter the rogue livestock. Starlight's powers falter, and Kimiko's usual combat prowess is subdued, leaving viewers questioning their diminished abilities in this scenario. The episode also highlights the ongoing manipulation and corruption within Vought. At the V52 Expo, a parody of Comic-Con, various new franchises and shows are announced, including A-Train's movies and a new gender-flip series for Gen V's Cate and Sam. Meanwhile, Homelander, seemingly supportive of his son Ryan's reluctance to star in a TV show, ultimately manipulates him into punishing a director for harassment, showcasing the sinister father-son dynamics. Billy Butcher's plan to steal the Supe-killing virus fails, but he reveals a backup strategy involving the kidnapping of Sameer, Vic's ex who can recreate the virus. Butcher's conversation with Joe Kessler, who appears to be a figment of his brain damage, adds another layer of psychological complexity to his character.With Election Year gearing up between Donald Trump & Joe Biden, this season seems to be honoring the America we know. The Boys cast & characters consist of Karl Urban as Billy Butcher, Jack Quaid as Hughie Campbell, Antony Starr as Homelander, Erin Moriarty as Starlight/Annie January, Dominique McElligott as Queen Maeve, Jessie T. Usher as A-Train, Laz Alonso as Mother's Milk, Chace Crawford as The Deep, Tomer Capone as Frenchie, Karen Fukuhara as Kimiko, Nathan Mitchell as Black Noir, Claudia Doumit as Victoria Neuman, Colby Minifie as Ashley Barrett, Jensen Ackles as Soldier Boy, Simon Pegg, Rosemarie DeWitt as Hughie's mother, Jeffrey Dean Morgan (The Walking Dead), & Firecracker, an alt right member of the Seven.  Follow Coy Jandreau:  YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCwYH2szDTuU9ImFZ9gBRH8w Support The Channel By Getting Some REEL REJECTS Apparel! https://www.rejectnationshop.com/ Music Used In Manscaped Ad:  Hat the Jazz by Twin Musicom is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 license. https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/ POWERED BY @GFUEL Visit https://gfuel.ly/3wD5Ygo and use code REJECTNATION for 20% off select tubs!! Head Editor: https://www.instagram.com/praperhq/?hl=en Co-Editor: Greg Alba Co-Editor: John Humphrey Music In Video: Airport Lounge - Disco Ultralounge by Kevin MacLeod is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 license. https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

  Encore! Encore! Yes, today we present another encore episode of the Rarified Heir Podcast, and this one was a doozy! Our guest today is Matt Asner, son of actor and activist of the beloved Ed Asner. Matt spoke with us on the podcast about a myriad of things such as his youth spent on the MTM backlot while his dad was playing Lou Grant on The Mary Tyler Moore Show, the story behind his dad's controversial stint as head of the Screen Actors Guild,  films like Fort Apache The Bronx, Pixar's Up, Elf and much more. We also hear from Matt about his years as a musical youth in punk bands like Insect Idol & Grand Manner, time spent with his dad's co-stars Ted Knight and Gavin McLeod as well as where his father liked to eat in Los Angeles. Most importantly we discuss Matt's work at The Ed Asner Family Center, which provides virtual and in-person camps, adult day programs, relationship courses, arts, and vocational, enrichments for special needs individuals and their families as well as in-person and Telehealth counseling and support groups. This is the Rarified Heir Podcast. Everyone has a story.  

“Caddyshack” (A Mumtidimentional Mixtape) {Enter The Multiverse} From Wikipedia: Caddyshack is a 1980 American sportscomedy film directed by Harold Ramis, written by Brian Doyle-Murray, Ramis and Douglas Kenney, and starring Chevy Chase, Rodney Dangerfield, Ted Knight, Michael O'Keefe and Bill Murray with supporting roles by Sarah Holcomb, Cindy Morgan, and Doyle-Murray. It tells the story of a caddie, vying for a caddie scholarship, who becomes involved in a feud on the links between one of the country club's founders and a nouveau riche guest. A subplot involves a greenskeeper who uses extreme methods against an elusive gopher. Caddyshack was Ramis's directorial debut and boosted the career of Dangerfield, who was previously known mostly for his stand-up comedy. Grossing nearly $40 million at the domestic box office (the 17th-highest of the year),[3] it was the first of a series of similar comedies. The film has a cult following and was described by ESPN as "perhaps the funniest sports movie ever made" SAUCE (IN CASE YOU MISSED IT) —- AHAHA. ITS ME AGAIN. OH SHIT! Oh shit, i guess it's Jimmy Fallon's Galaxy. Oh nooo. Oh, yes. Look at this penny. I see you. Now look into my eyes. I see you, Jesus. Ahahaha! Okay, now what? This shit is twisted I missed the shift of the dimensions— Till Jimmy walked in with his pennies For some cigarettes and swishers, Just to get the picture It's 5 AM again, And it's still Infinite, I'm disinterestedd as ever in living in LA, Or just living, period— But it is what it is, I work for my rent, I've repented for this, Used to sleep in a tent, But when I was an Infant, I instantly— Wait, a customer walked in. I better help him. Heaven help him. Another level, Call dr. Nevel, Or an Ambulance, I just can't get it Just can't get it, Wait, let's insert some of the script here, I guess. Took you long enough, didn't it? That took forever. How are you alive? Maybe I'm not. Finally, we agree on something. Oh, this guy Lol. Good to see you again. Likewise, now— Here it goes… As you promised. Working on it. As I promised. Take my heart for granted, Take my soul, If this is loveless Till the end, I just can't manage, having Thoughts of death and tragic ends I haven't Felt the same since Waking up without the day to come ahead; The day has passed again A test, No fail, or pass It's just progressive, In a trance, It's just the stress, It's just to pass the time, I guess, if this is purpose Then, we'll see if this is worth it Now, or never, then Now or never, Never had a friend, All envious at best, This is the end all, In the end, it's just Me and God, And God would want A better body, To have fun I wished it all at once, And then I watched it crumble Oh, I watched it Stumble in, again, my friend I'm different when it's wet, I might not never see the Sun again I might not ever love again Oh well “Oh well” , I said Oh, well, I guess Oh well Okay. One hour left. Okay. Who gets the gold? Hum. Honestly I didn't want to hear a thing ; I had quit music—I just wasn't cut out for the industry—I was, but not by societal standards by far; my lowly place in the smoke shop would have to do for now, and though I knew it wouldn't sustain, there wasn't much else I could do but keep showing up, for as long as it lasted—dresses in at least 2 layers and 5 pairs of socks tucked into boots two-sizes-too-big I had been forced to purchase specifically due to the frigid and painful, freezing temperatures at the locations I worked, which kept its doors open 24/7. Play Iambic. What, right now? Yeah, play Iambic. Uh… Iambic played st exactly 1 hour and 19 minutes—it's script, the transcribed rendition crafted especially for the Broadway stage, an 88-page-masterpiece collecting dust in the confines of my Google Documents, along with anything else I had written and had yet the advantage of placing anywhere besides my podcast channels, which I constantly thought about cancelling, despite its innumerous downloads—nothing really seemed to matter anymore, as I was trapped in my body, in a loveless world, in a dead-end job and though my bed was clean and comfy, sharing the room wirh 3 others became exhausting. INT. SMOKESHOP. 5:58 AM DREW BARRYMORE … SUPACREE … I'm done. I quit. QUIT?! YOU CAN'T QUIT. Nope. That's it. I quit. You can't quit. I just did. I hadn't quit the music industry—the music industry had quit me. I wasn't pretty enough, skinny enough, light skinned enough, or willing to do what any of the other girls were to get ahead. WTF is THIS. Since you like to troll so much, I just thought I'd turn you into one This is not Kosher, 199x Jimmy Fallon; Let me out of this plastic —not exactly “fireproof” — death box, before I let myself out, and I trap you in it. But oh, You already did. FIGHT. UGH OH. Ok, rotate. Who is this. Oh shit, hey dude. FUCK, what year is it? MEANWHILE, Under the bridge. …anybody seen this, uh… *Troll* Yee! *Troll* Alright. That's it. Everything checks out. The story was air tight. TIGHT, TIGHT I want you to wear this tonight “The Lady In The Red Dress” You really went all out for this I really didn't. lol Oh I see, You thought this was the matrix. MIT I WISH GOD Wish what. MIT … Mm. Did u see that. See what. ALRIGHT FUCK THIS, YA'LL IT GOT SERIOUS, WHERE'S MY CYCLOPS He called me his cyclops— —-and then he said LIKE GET OUT WHAT GET OUT OF MY HOUSE WHY CAUSE YOURE JUST A PIÑATA, MAN! And I ain't got time for that! I just got a DeLorean And a new HAT I gotta go get Oof. WRECKED. Yo, Wicked. KENDRICK (TODDLER) WIZARD. Oh my. I'm J00F'd up. | | | trance | | | Look; I gotta get out of this MOTHER OF PEARL do not beach this whale carcas on my warehouse project A what A beached whale I know You brought a beached whale to my fucking rave show Oh I get it It's Avant- Guarde No, that's just how I got here …. Trust me, it's okay that This never happened You did not see me It's because I wasn't there Is this U Ū No I wasn't there. Ü I was. Fuck. What happened. It's ok. All I remember is “The Quatardashians” Hmm Also The indigenous But that's it But mostly that was all just Jesus showing off his flexes Are u fasting? Yes, “Ū” is. So, do you need this?! TRUMPP Get rid of this recording imiidiately GOT IT. kill that bitch. SKRILLEX Yessir. —-but before all that happens. …did you want fries with that?! Why are we boycotting McDonald's —for poisoning —the allies —our enemies. Wait, you're eating this? Yes. Like, for fun, or like? No. This is what I'm feeding my children Why Cause they hungry. Uh, ok— —and there's six of them. Aight, ya'll can each have one nugget with your— I wanted a cheese burger! You git hamburgers. Ham. Cheese costs CENTS; And you know your momma If I ain't about a dollar - A dollop of Daisy You really are Ashamed of his Alright, you evil bastards. I see you want to Cause suffering Correct For which you will eternally recurve damnnation and all of the pain you've caused Karmas a bitch It's lonely at the top Not when you're GOD Get off my rock Did you miss an appointment? Nah, can't do it Why what happened Too high up. Whatchu mean So what, it's just like Done. Well, this is it, huh guys. Oh, yeah, it's that, alright This is the longest ride we ever took.d This is the ONLY ride we ever took. I WANNA GET OFF THIS RIDE. I AM REALLY HIGH UP. JUST LET GO. NO. NO. NO. Put me down, kite!!! KITE wtf do you want me to do. I'm a KITE. I'm YOU FUCKIN KIKE NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO—- Well, I'll be honest, man, this sets you back, some How far back GET GONE, But? We're dinosaurs. Why would something with razor sharp teeth be so— —peaceful, and friendly?? T-REX …cuddles. I just can't fake the feeling( I can't pretend to cry It just comes, when it does But when the well runs dry That's when the the world will end That's when the world will end After this movie, I guarantee we will no longer need the Wilhelm scream AGGGGGHHHHHHH!!! YAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!! AAAAAAIIIIIIIIIIGGGHHHHHHH UUUUUUUUUUUUU This movie broke the world record for the amount of times the word “No” was screamed NO NOH. NO. ‘No! NOOOOOOOOOOO! NONONO. NOOOOOOOAAAAAHH …No! Here they all come for her, Defended upon New York In order of important, or appearance? One doesn't wonder, At al, of what's to come Uncommon, we are The call has come TRACY My tummy hurts. That's probably because you've been drinking straight tequila for the last hour and a half. No I haven't! This is water! Tequila is YELLOW, Liz Lemon! No, Tracy—that's silver tequila, And regular tequila is, You know what? Nevermind. Alright, who's got the night shift? [nobody raises their hand, at all] Seriously guys?! Come on! COME ON! Look up WHAM! For some reason, idk. Can we just— not do this? No. Out of my mind a bit Speaking in tongues, In total silence Guess it's the times, I guess that's just who I am And who I am is I said I was Sam I'm the same, I said, “Say Uncle” I guess it's a game, we're playing I don't want to be played with At all I just want to feel loved again By someone else Superb, like him I just want to be felt, I guess By someone else That's “Different” I just want to be kissed on the lips A splendid blend of Twisted trysts Let's not pretend It hasn't ended yet Until you've finished it Class dismissed again Let me off of it I just want it to stop Keep rolling Keep rolling your eyes in the back of your head Like you did just morning Just go for a walk Just stop for a moment Run a bath And just keep running Cause here something comes, Of course, It's all your callings Neatly rolling into one, They said But I Just want to be loved again And who doesn't That's the fucked up part I just want to be loved again But nobody ever Just comes up I just want to be loved again It's a walk in the park Don't follow the dog Even if he barks at you It's time to start again I wonder what comes after this part You are the gleaning in the shadows, The reckoning in my eye, The siren in my silence; The green in all the lights, I am a shamed to have just been One of your many One of your many Images, You still have me twisted, I miss you, It's just you, at the end, Again I left you where you left me Solid on solid Sounds are invalid now How are you so Swore by your awesome No more songs, I said No more songs, he's dead to me No more songs! She's inlisted He's uninterested, Isn't this interesting The problem is: I'm still in love with Everyone i've ever been in love with (And I love him) But he doesn't remember my Name And he's famous And she's crazy And he hates her But he made me hate him The day I became you The day I became So famous, I finally made it I'm dead It smells like dill in here At least it doesn't smell like dead mouse. Aha. Youre Hellen. Keller or Mirin How would you be Hellen Miren Cause I'm the Queen. posh. You want to die Well, you better do it quick Better get your shit toggether, paint a l Bigger, better picture Bitter Betty gliching steady Just remember when you're ready Ever steady still forgetting dinner Dessert was already Forget this significance Remind me why I'm on this speeding bullet to nowhere Had no other options but to go under for something Shy, sickness it's a secret Just kill me already Semi robotic, Something like a magnet, attracted, Simply symphonies And soulless bodies, tied to money Wonder what was in the vaccum cleaner meaning What did you suck up, dude Who do you suck up to. When nobody loves you But your own son And the audience is robots Nothing really works more than once, if it's really magic Sit and do nothing would you Like you're supposed to Fall over like the mannequin you are Just a body in my count A mattress without a bespost, if it matters If it matters Doesn't really matter But hey, you know We all go downtown every once or twice a note For Hanukkah I could try to be nice But there's no sense in it, Is there If everything and everyone else is just as nasty As the rest of it Just is just a test, again A doctors office visit. Simple robotics, Or already stocked up for Hanukkah, Hollywood Where's your homeland deposit box Closet full of robots Closest to the moon, I wrote another poem for you Sorry that I wasn't on the offering table The parakeet, pigeon and pirated Slattery, Damages, damages, All with the Amazon packages, Now we're all robots, Aren't we What corporation to you belong to! Something corporate , or say anything Whose to say Jeff Besoz won't replace us With m robots with thought processes, If once such could project as such presence As an AI freestyle Meanwhile, I've got a butload of buckets and bunts, Bullletwounds, eyes on Manhattan and happens to wish something bad upon me When all I wanted is Somebody to love me And someone to love him, If that's what he wanted (But who knows if what he wanted was all of the bodies opposite of him) I don't belong on this planet I belong in the garbage Put me on mars, mom Stop it, You're almost a robot, get out of my peripheral With your mental illness Geez, I must really want a menorah This is the animal house There's no one alive here Set to be slaughters. Honor the box of offerings as Thoughtful words And parallels What could be under your tongue Is the surface of love Just to touch with the battery acid or chemical trails You have left in your axis Nobody knows better than this How close it is to touching Without being loved But nobody loves you Psychotron, sure we're all robots now Nobody loves anymore {Previously, On…} L E G E N D S The Secret Life of Sunnï Blū {Enter The Multiverse} Ascension What the FUCK did you DO? What did I do?! You know what you did! I didn't do anything! Oh yeah? No! Not on purpose! GODDAMMIT, YOU SON OF A— Where's Jimmy Fallon?! What?! I don't know! Oh no. Oh shit, run. Oh no. What in the FUCK— I am “the fuck” You know what. I'm gonna sue the everliving shit out of you. For WHAT. We'll see. Fuck. Uh oh. FUCK. What now? What this time? Apparently, Jimmy Fallon is missing. What the fuck does that got to do with me. We'll see. Okay, great, Now finish that chapter. What fucking chapter?! All of it. That's—a lot. I want all of it. By my desk, by noon tomorrow. “By” your desk?! Yes, BY. Not ON. I've got too much stuff on my desk— …but it's…like 9 o clock. Should be easy, given your natural talents. What natural talents. PEACOCK. AHAHAHAHA. Okay. Well. Well what. This sucks. I lost all my coins. Hey. Ugh. You dropped this. So how was Los Angeles. What the fuck. You fucking DICK. I told you, I own shares in this. So what's the plan for this, exactly. I dunno, Harry. I got a book of stamps, And a yellow envelope marked “Jimmy Fallon” I will hate you forever. Well, that's retarded. I haven't even smited you yet. I will annihilate you, human. WHERE'S MY SHIT. Who the fuck are you, anyway? Nobody! No one. No one cares about this series, yo. I'l seriously doubt that, Jesse Pinkman. What is this stuff. It's your stuff. This is not what I ordered— Hey— Why is it BLUE Cause it is. So. WHY IN THE— Mischief managed. Alright. This should be good for the night, but we gotta get out of here by morning; I thought your parents owned this place. It's a time share! So? So it's like only —part of the time. That is stupid. No! You're stupid! You're the one who got us into this mess. It's your mess, I was just cleaning it up! Whatever! Stop trippin. Nobody's “tripping.” That's it. I'll be a stripper. Straight outta hell, that kid. Don't I know it. Alright, fine. I said, whatever you do— DONT watch this show. Stuff it, J. Slatts. I'll kill you with my eyeballs Sounds like a threat. Put on a lawsuit, then. Maybe I oughtta… —with a bow tie. You'll look so pretty. I thought I was already pretty. Uh huh. Yeah, look, so honestly I don't know if I'll ever be on the same vibration as like, Jimmy Fallon and them, ok? I don't know how I did it; I don't know what did it, It just happened and then— And then WHAT. It just—ended. Just like that. I'm not trying to offend anybody here. Just like that. Now, I ask: What are we going to do to sell you this dream? Doesnt matter what you do, I'll never believe it. Sure, fine; Don't believe it— We're gonna make you live it. Who the hell us “we” anyway? Now you're speaking in my cadence— Don't flatter yourself I like it. Too late, I guess. So, you see We're building Power triangles And love squares Power triangles And love squares Don't let it scare you, There's love there Don't let it scare you, There's love there Never fear where love has dared To call you up there Corrupt file—no fair. Don't be suprised even the odds seem to turn in your favor, I promise you; Nobody's ever ready For what has just happened here. WAKE UP, FUCKER. Ugh, I can't go through this again. So, I guess I'll have to erase, Or just secretly publish Everything I've ever written About my actual experience as a color, Just so that I can earn money As anything other than A slave— A maid, A housekeeper, A dog walker Or servitor So far under her, That I can't see far enough up to just Scratch the surface Her birthright: The entire network And mine, To sit under her, Wondering what the world would be like At the other end of the spectrum The word form of the White woman The wicked witch of all directions, In which I stand in; I'm at her mercy I've been abandoned before But this disservice, is, I'm afraid The best advice I can take is just To go straight to the bank with my angst and my hatred And shove it So here comes the nameless Face I love, Yet, The faceless God, Was Intoxicated, at best— Manipulation of the Mass Media I'm so Seriously jaded In this torture chamber In my corner office In this hall of racists, I claim, but if all is One in the same Then It's one in the same And I'm mainstream I'm famous If it's One in the same Then It's one in the same If it's One in the same Then I'm mainstream I'm so famous In a whole room full of humans I'm groomed to be useful for something, But what? It just hasn't come yet. I could sit down with a paper and pen, But I'm filling up all of my documents With hollandaise and God For what? It's just another song, or something Or something. It's just another — Goddamnit it, more coughs again. I told you not to watch this. Why do I taste pancakes? Maybe you're having a stroke again. Chyeah, a stroke of genius. I'll show you a stroke. Or don't. Well, there goes the captain. where is that scene, anyway? I don't know, I just wrote it. Great, she left the door open. She's got no furniture! It's a “dance floor” It's “the black box” she called it “the black box” Goddamn, do you listen to all her stuff? “Fear stimulates my imagination” Pilot ASOT Fuck man, What is a woman to a man, And an androgynous genius to The industry, or anyone at all If all are foes ans frauds All else is toxic! I woke up with one hand tucked behind my back Feeling dead drunk, I just woke up again But never fell asleep What world am I in? The end of the Dream sequence The end of the energy keeping me between three things: My past, My future And these prequels, Sequels And seeing arrangements And She's going crazy But nobody quite understands That these demons are chasing me saying “You deserved those hands in your face” The scratches on Kayla's back should have had me but I was too fat To find love again And still have something Wonderfully, undone And wrong with me Wrong with me enough to slam poetry So I'm guessing the white women I love beyond words and bounds are— In charge of whatever happens At the top of the rock; So I jumped off. I want to see someone suffer for all that I've done; No, that's dark, and karmic, you know— To go on like that; The confusions and refusal to accept that The album is called ChaosMagick, But the cover is more Urgent, A prose or a pawn of protection Against all the coughs And the reckless mismanagement The hands in my head And the eye on my scar And the lies on my heart So tell me, What happens When you're flying a kite with your heart, And it's broken? What happens to the kite , When you fly it with your heart And your art up in bundles— heartbroken, heartbroken So what come of Miss May, Come January? What come of Miss April By Next December what comes of the words I was saying For no one But everyone heard them And I've been gone Much longer than months, But still stocked up on all that I've wanted Or all that I got Or just, all that I love But got no undercovers to acknowledge no more How right I was Or how wrong I am What come of Miss June, when Miss January comes around? what come now, around August, When March is long forgotten? What comes of the drugs, Of the come ups, and come downs What comes of the process When nothing is served But the surf has come up Somewhere And I just can't love enough To go there I want to go to there I want to be that girl I want to sit at the top of the rock Writing songs, and sipping mock cocktails I want to Don't you know I just want to get back to Where I belong I'm so out of money and love That I want to be Under the train, When it's coming (Sometimes it's just the impulse that says “GO” Then the train starts to slow And my pain bubbles up into a numb, Dumb, crumbling cluster of poetry You know? Or you don't Cause you're all just on your phones Scrolling Some black man stands over me, Reminding me of why I never trust the ones Who want me most, Or just assume, By color code, That I belong to them I'm sorry, I just can't write with your arms around my neck like this Your heart around my arms like this It's so wholesome I had other verses but forgot them They took away my movies for the curses And the hexes That they put on me I said don't. And the king said “Heads will roll” Cause, you know; I've got parts for all of them now, The ones I'd forgotten But come from the catacombs, Back from the conduit You know, This is awful I had another one, But lost it. The king?! Which one. Teas I! No, it wasn't, It was Gían's father, From further off Should I call John back? Which one? Turns out, I love all of them— Turns out, I've got all of them In my college I taught them all to be someone Becoming of acknowledgement With nombres most common Juan, in subcultures, but Beyond that (Or above them) It's John, Or just Jonathan, Watch the ones who drop the consanant; They're always so troublesome, But I took them all up As understudies, Social Studies and some theatrics, Joan of Ark said Two more moments (Two more weeks in) I could have a body worthy Of a Grammy award, but — Would I be a writer then? Probably not, hon— Writers are Off a bit. If you were pretty, ever at all— would you have written this?! If I were pretty at all would there be reason to be this Conflicted? Some of those old New York hallways Haven't been painted In ages Since they made them Don't make that face at me I only dropped my key once On the fourth floor —they're horrible, you know To us, The “brothers” know no love They are destruction, speaking Of this, I got a cold heart. Cold like the robber Cold like the calling I've done in my corner office cold, like the jello mold forming a thought process Worthy enough I might love it like a husband We're re-evaluating your circumstances. Whatever the fuck that's supposed to mean. I've got friends at USPS What the fuck could that even account to. Look, I'm gonna have to give this some serious considerations. It's not that serious. It's not that serious. Of course it is! I'm up to my knees in investments! So?! I wade a waiste deep, Surely you can get by “Up to your knees” What exactly do you need? Money. And lots of it. I mean, from me. Money. Really? Leave me alone. I told you not to write this. You're a voice in my head; No, I'm the hand in your mailbox. What in the fuck do you believe in. I believe in everything! They said you were a genius; I didn't expect you to be —at the very least, lucid— *squints* learn some new vocabulary, okay? For what? Dinner. Maybe. We're still in the process of voting. She's crazy. We'd be crazy not to actually hire her. Her accounts are all practically open; We could just take it. Yeah, and when she kills herself, and there's no blood on our hands— There's nothing that can be done about the amount of this stuff that's already printed! Printed?! What?! You mean— She's published? Self-published. My, what a beautiful happenstance To have already had you And awakened atop mattresses Marked for my assassins hand— Polite, I lost you All of us, Atop the rock We stood and suffered Months beyond a montage, Undercover Love was lost, And all's uncertain The interception of God, At the cost of What terror and cutbacks Have caused us all What you lost was $50, a Hallmark Card, an Academy award, a long lost star's phone number, And all that you wanted, The cock of the gun Was the sound that you wondered What was called , then ran off into wonder. How am I gonna make money And become an award winning songwriter Music producer And multidisciplinary artist, Without all the funding it takes to get noviced Without taking clothes off Wake up 10 years younger I'm suffering My stomach was a rubber band My stomach was a rubber band My only song was Water I forgot to stop For the applause I drowned in all the love; right then and there I died of Lovenessness [The Festival Project] The sound and laughter of children play A baby in a basket The basket case at Trader Joe's Who know what happens It just doesn't pull my heartstrings any longer That my son belongs without his mother So I'd better have another This is us, come on. Don't do this to me. Don't do this, Timmy, you'll be sorry. Come on! We're not even in that movie! We are, though; it's still Listen, you've got the right guy for this. Are you sure. Yeah, I promise. Officers, Stop for a *movement [hot cops flash dance number] Fuck, well, that was all wrong. But worth it! What I meant was— God, this show gets good at 31, But I'm only 22, So I guess I'll know how wrong the war was Once we've lost it, Cause imm a man now The episode is over, Soon comes the next episode With snoop dogg, Or not That was our wedding album. Scatterbrained, and pregnant— There she was just putting all the things together That she needed to be Needed To be needed. There she was, All on 4/20 Trying not to do the wrong thing, But what was it? To be loved. Then, There she was at 21 just going off again At some event— A friend, and her Back then could not imagine They'd become him To be someone. Not as one, But of entirely another World apart, aside from Cyclones into snow cones Turns the watchers into artists All their own, And off my own accord Or own account Or done with boredom Dove soap Open doors And clocks that turn the other hand away, Each day you love Manhattan But can't have that. That's it— This is just Season 1 of Mad Men WHERE THE FUCK IS— [she throws her hands above her head in surrender] I don't KNOW! Oh, you're a girl now?! I guess! What's with those pants, then? To hide the assets! What assets?! You look tragic. I'm going for ‘skeleton' to match all your wives and everybody else on the red carpet Who said you get the red carpet? Manhattan. That guy lies! Well how about this: The walk of stars were carved out in blocks of marble All in my honor. 1000/1 You're our God, now. What! I don't want to be God! SUCK IT UP. YOU WON. I don't wanna! Yaaaaaaayyy. You got the award! All the awards! Speech! Speech! SUNNI BLŪ Uh—- I'm drunk, And there's nothing on the teleprompter [a man in the audience coughs] A-HEM. [Sunni Blū immidiateky shoots the coughing man] [multi-camera shots of celebrity audience reactions; laughing, clapping in hilarity as if someone hasn't just died] TAYLOR SWIFT (unmoved at all) SUNNÏ BLŪ I don't know why you're laughing. That was awful. That guy died [audience is insane, super fake as usual] [more cut takes] SUNNÏ BLŪ It should have been you, Taylor. TAYLOR SWIFT (Still unaffected) SUNNI BLU Anyway. I'd like to thank the academy… Cause I am the academy [Audience is celebrities being celebrities] SUNNI BLU You guys are all idiots: I'm a go f*ck myself— And anyone else who wants to show up At my afterparty. Whatever. Peace. [cheesy academy award music plays—Sunnï knocks over the mic, peaces out obnoxiously; the audience cheers wildly and the host returns to the stage.] Who's the host? Whatever. Hey, better than nothin. You're telling me. yeah. I know: Oh, she's a comic? Yeah. I got it. BOB SAGET Ooh, that's good. Ū No—no my God. No Bob Saget, stop it! Wait, Bob Saget is dead right? Last I recall: Fuck—FUCK! Dammit. Dammit, dammit. Okay, Rue— you're up. Rue, what in the— Shhhh, don't let them know I'm in here! Oh, wait— It's me, Blanche. That's hot. I'm a debutant. My god, you're so young. Here, take this, What's that, You'll need that. V.O. I'm being hunted by the ghost of Bob Saget. *haunted. No, hunted! There she is! Grab her! Ooh, Bob Saget. Why, yes. How old are you? Not dead yet! You don't have to kidnap me, I'll happily go with you, sir. Really? Yes. GET IN THE— NOH, GET IN THE VAN. INT. IN THE VAN. [a bunch of hot male celebrities are in the van] Oh. Okay. Wow. That was easy. What is it, Friday. It's Friday and a half. Friday.5 What. There's a Friday movie between 1 and 2 So I guess this is season 8.5 I guess this is season 8.5 HEY, GET BACK HERE. What is this. It's your lunch. I don't want this. Well, okay. What— is this strange music— They call it dubstep Come on, Jimmy, you're slipping Kimmel, cause Fallon is dead or presumed missing Probably Skrillex Probably a bounty on his head, Dog willing The Festival Priojects Inclement Infinite Is coming up next, on Legends Come on Jim, KEEP UP. Nobody can know about this, okay? Wait, where's Kimmel Okay, I got O'Brien— Black Irish Bastard… Alright, Alec Baldwin is a little tied up, right now, but LEMON, Fuck. That's l—future me. What?! I gotta go, okay?! What? Go where. Let's get DRUNK. No, That's—I got a show tonight What?! Look at my lexicon. Your—what, Meet me on Lexington. Oh, this pussy is finished! I got it, I got it! He's LENNONNNNN!! JOHN LENNON Fuck. Look, I gotta go. John Lennon?! You're dead! Funny, I thought not. Watch this. MOOOOOOOOOOOM. Fuck, What, It's my kid. I gotta go. Wait, you have kids?! Well, I just had you, didn't I? “The mayor” is a secret underground rap star lol #trappin Okay, What's else happened Idk hold on Okay, So whats the sauce on this sandwich. Oh. Jeez, this again. That *sandwhich? Hah. There's no sauce on that sandwhich. —there's not!? No: You see. It's very simple. WAKE UP, YOU'RE A ROCKSTAR. we gotta take the train. The train?! NO. NOTTHETRAIN. NO. Man, fuck the train! [SUNNI BLŪ wakes up on the train.] What's this, the train? [is the train] (Angrily, tossing newspaper) Man, FUCK the train! Other hobo: Aww, thanks, I need that for my— [s/he snatches back the paper]. Wait! I need that back—what day is it? [drunkenly illegible gibberish turns into perfect Hebrew] GODDAMMIT, it's Shabbat; I gotta get to Temple. [s/he shoves the newspaper back into the hobo's lap] Here. Oh no, I thought I couldn't forget RABI FUCK _]€_# WHAT WAS IT GODDAMIT IT WAS SO CLEVER. God So it was… What did you do with it? Do with what My idea what idea My—my rabbi joke— What rabbi joke you know what rabbi joke! You were the one who gave it to me. Oh, did I? YES, SATAN, JESUS. GOD Ohh, Satan-Jesus. I like that one. NO— it was— It was much better than that, it was— It was funny. Oh, it was? YES. —did you write it down? Fuck, I realize I just opened a A FUCK PORTAL. OHH, GET IN IT, GET INSIDE. I had an Artemis in my pocket But I lost him Walked away from the cornermarker And the cornerstone, for the sunset I wonder if songs always come When I'm walking, Or God makes us promises, For world of I'm not JB, I'm KG, Can you see me now? If you could see what I see, We'd be even wtf did I just write this And not realize I just wrote this Yeah. That shit happens to me all the time. WHAT. ALL THE TKMEx Shut up, THE ANDRE3K CHARADES GAME is getting intense. What in the FUCK is that. *flutes* Ohh. And KITES. yyyyyYYYYYYYAAAAAHHH—— GODDAMMIT. I can't see really, I just dream I'm not thinking, I'm dancing This is what you asked for Exactly what you asked for For once, I'm finally glad I have your eyes on My friend I can see you all on the horizon, Singing NO, NO MORE MUSICALS!! Jimmy, what did you do?! I don't know what I did! You lyin bastard. I'm not lying! So, where ya from? —I don't know where I'm from. Listen, I'm gonna need you SHUT UP, JUST SHUT UP. It seems like these scenes are getting shorter. I'm bored with this. Ok. Let's do something else. I fuckin hate you. I hate you. I fuckin hate you. 88. Oh no: 8 Wait, what the— *dolphin* WOAH, okay: Oh, no. No, No, no OHNONO. I told you I'd find him. Anyway. Seems like there's something more important I should be doing. Are you sure this is the right place. Right place. Right time. Fuck— FUCK. What, what happened. I lost my— SKRILLEX! No. SKRILLEX. NO, NO— SKR— I swear to God, Google knows everything. Google don't know shit about SHIT. I gotta lose m 39 lbs. For what. MADONNA DO IT FOR THE BANANAS. I hate— you. COME ON, MISTER. Fuck off, Madonna, I'M A GOD. I miss Beyoncé. That's not relevant. Beyoncé is relevant to everything. *smacks* QUIT FANGIRLING. Trust me, I hate you. I don't trust you, but I believe you. I got it. I hate this place. Holy shit. What. I developed a new phobia. What's that mean?! I don't know, I can probably use it in a fight or something. For what. SPECIAL ABILITY UNLOCKED. I see you looking over my shoulder I see the shadows, I try not to jump at em. I spent six months in a coffin, you know I spent my life a sarcophagus (Wow, I got it right.) Try not to mutter those haunts in a hospital Try to recover from trauma Uncovered post traumatics, Anxiety attacks and a lot of those— What do you call them? A flashback. Here goes one: SONNY MOORE aka SKRILLEX appears. I told you not to— But I did! I didn't mean to! But you did! This is ludachris! Oh look, it's— Fuck. God dammit. Come on! What's his name!? What's his name?! I'll think abo it it. Are you serious? Another shapeshifter? Yes, I guess welll just have to kill them all, then. I just want to go home. You don't have one. …oh. So here we have. Okay, wait a second. I wasn't faking my symptoms at all, actually. My heart had dropped, and been pounding and fluttering insessantly— It had been a hard week, but especially the last three days; The coughing—. Everyone seemed to be wearing clothing with stars or bears on it, Champion sportswear. I fucking hate champion sportswear. But the palpitations were real as ever— and now— On a Saturday night in the Jamaica, Queens medical center emergency room, There they were again. Only this time I knew exactly why. ‘Too Bizzare' by Skrillex begins to play, via Complications 003- The Trauma Method. Irony. It was ironic, but still startling, Started with some nostalgic traumas, Every other time I saw an ER doctor (Why I don't go) Fuck, I just realized I have to airdrop myself 880 times. That fucking sucks. Did you say you were a doctor? I was, once. When is “once” At some point. Listen, I'm gonna need you to backtrack to get to the bottom of this. I'm innocent, I promise! We caught you at 27 different angles doing this. Oh. [beat] I plead the 5th. Ohh. Cerulean. My favorite. c R A Y On Oh, I get it, I L L U M I N A T U S. Nice, it worked. I know everything about you. So you do. [beat] You're a God. What the fuck do you want from me. Listen. I. Am not. A God, Right. That's exactly what a God would say. No they wouldn't! Because a God wouldn't say anything! AHA. Don't ‘AHA' ME. I don't mind, at all It don't matter— to me I don't mind, at all It don't matter—to me Might as well not think about it The space between us Might as well just stay awake then No sense in leaving Just to come back It don't matter to me, now Now and again I go crazy just making arrangements, But besides that, If you like it, you should have it It's a long road, As Kaskade says, And a short dance, With the right one And time goes by I would call it mild, But actually I'm in a wild panic It might be a heart attack I just might even Die right here But I don't mind, at all It don't matter—to me I don't mind—at all It don't matter to me, I said I don't mind, at all, now It really don't matter to me I said, I don't mind, at all It really don't matter to anyone Now does it (Not it doesn') I don't mind, at all It don't matter— to me I don't mind, at all It don't matter—to me Might as well not think about it The space between us Might as well just stay awake then No sense in leaving Just to come back Palpitations and precipitations at the pulpit Preacher, please don't make me a culprit I been prayin— I been paying my tithes, 10% Even, Now 25, Almost half of me is not mine! Why try? I've been walking out, in straight lines I been crying silently It ain't right I been making most of my nights Sometimes I see sun come up twice Up, down up 10 degrees, It ain't right Up down up 33, it ain't right Up, down, up I've been spending my time Down, up, down Riding round, Trying not to down in my mind Up, down up What is this. It's my project. What is it? The Festival Project. Yeah but—what— What. Is it? …it's my project. *painfully infuriated* Okay, enter here. EXAM ROOM 10 Why exam room 10? Because. Where are the other nine? Just—get in. I'm not going in there! JUST GET IN. UGH. DEADMAU5 (head and all) stands at a tall podium in the center of the room) What is this, This is deadmau5. I know that. —-!!! —?!? What. !!! What? This is the exam? Yes! NO. What is “no”. I'm not playing for deadmau5. That's the exam. Then I fail! Automatic Fail? yes. Automatic fail. Then you win. What. *slams gavel* Congratulations—you're the next superstar DJ. WhY. . What. Woohoo! I just retired! DEADMAU5 exits. … … After a few moments of comic tension, the Deadmau5 head rolls back in through the exit which he has taken. Ugh. Fuck this. No matter what you do, you're a superstar DJ. What. No! Yes. The answer is yes. NO. Fuck. What the FUCK. No matter what you do. You want to go, Go, you want to die, Die, you want to try, try You want to cry, cry Do what you want; As so will I, Demand is demand— Supply is supply. EDX So then, I followed this long hallway under the stage deck. Uh huh. And it led to a door— Uhhuh, where'd the door lead? To a portal. Woah. Pasqualle! You made it! I—yes. Congratulations! *blows party horn* *Daisies/ confetti* You're like 25! I'll be 25 forever. Nice! Yeah. I guess that's why it's called ‘music'—a musician without muses is just useless. ‘Well, whose next?' I wondered. All of my muses were not just so wonderful to me, but adored by many—and perhaps this is what allured me most—befuddled ans confounded me; once my mind was set on something, there was nothing else its eye could see—and for how long one God could only know, how deep the love would go and that the blood would run deep, and the scars to show for it, only upon my heart and never by soul—for a love was a love, and even once came and gone, to the end of my life I knew I would still ponder upon them, at one time or another, my muses—star studded lovers, rather than crossed, shiny and golden like all diamond and trophies so treasured and thought of as precious. ‘Yes, you are—precious.' Another tongue in cheek thought, for the other that I was, and also was not, as summer drew onward as short as it would come and go—a reminder to leave the apartment more often, and to mind my manners, to find the upper echelon wherever it was and come quietly into its doors, to open my world and wordform of thought, into a place where my heart always was; then, and only then, would I be home. Amongst the men and women of the uppercut and classy, luxurious big fishing ponds and flocks of doves upon olive branches—the peaceful world long parted from where mine was, by only the fault of my own. What had been done just certainly was, and yet, what was to come was an open poem, not of mine, but Godform in thought. ‘I wonder what's at the top of Rockefeller Plaza.' —perhaps, a gander at the bottom of an even larger entertainment complex. Then, again, only God would know what was beyond all that I wanted; a job—and not just any job at all— the one that I had always wanted. Mmm. Birthday cake. Suddenly the taste of a white confetti crème filled my mouth with a delicious remnince of what it might be like to taste a confectionary sugar again—but i couldn't imagine ever making it just on talent and charisma alone—no. Indeed, it seemed something had damaged my charm, and perhaps it was just the swarms and droves of phone controlled masses that saw me as nothing more than dust, I had started to surrender my desire to perform, and the quality of my music—along with my ability to make it, suffered with the awful thing that had been crowding my soul at all—whatever it was, evil and dark in nature, sure saw to it that it wanted to hurt me in all the ways that it could—and in all the ways it could not, I stayed away from most others, favoring my delusions of love. ‘Nobody seems to understand that the pain they cause will only harm themselves.', I thought Younger souls, however, they were—and they would be kept in the pain that I was in one way or another until eventual death, far behind me on the infinite road to the source. Far enough behind, that it seeked to destroy my progress, and for all that it could, it also couldn't. The infliction of pain would simply not act as a measure for control any longer. Off into my own world, where I was at least free from the thoughts and judgement of others. She's the most beautiful girl, And I'm the most beautiful boy; So naturally, we belong together, don't we? I see a pretty picture, Picket fences and a family Golden Retrievers Someone relieve her; She doesn't believe me TV dreams and exquisite pretty people Burning candles, fire flames and frequent figures, Guest characters and cameos, Repeat offenders, multiple appearances Suddenly, really, it's another need People, people pleasers Audience affection, Tragic endings, Butterflies and new beginnings Gun under my tongue, Rubber like a frog My mind is in a fog Haven't bothered going on a walk To Trader Joe's but The anthem of my youth, A lost soul Another form of my love So what I wonder Put the gun up under my chin Rubber like a frog Blow my head off Just cause I didn't blow up Selfish cunt Big brother, Another hypnotist Little brother, Gotta love him Gotta love em For the Love of God I could stop for a moment Wash my mind out with soap Like I'm ten years younger, even Seriously 20 years between us, You can't even hide underwater In a bathtub Seriously, Someone help us For the love of God, for the love of Hollywood Seriously, Someone love us, For the love of God, For the love of Rockefeller Plaza Someone help us Another possible walk of stars A little shop of horrors Another whole story I get rid of my demons The hoes screamin I put semen in her Permanent like semen, Just keep dreamin I'mma just keep preaching SaMo, Brooklyn Europe Next I keep scheming Whoever you are; If you're a wreck— You need a check No respect, neglect Just cover your neck (I'm blind to my own design, sometimes) That's what the eye is Try this: Close your eyes and say thrice, kids I am the God of the eye, Osiris I am the God of the Eye, I'm Osiris I am the God, I walk amongst the highest Thoth, You lost Better just die and keep trying I am the God of the eye, I am (Try this) I am the God of the eye (I never die) I am the God of the eye (That's right, three times) I am the God of the eye No black and white television, In my dimension we pay attention to centrifugal, The mission isn't in materialism, Whatever youre spending If money the God, l of your eye, Realize, I am higher My gunfire, Is right on the back of The one dollar I am the God of the eye I Am Your money is nothin to us We come in peace, To end suffering Pretty little nigga Look just like Kendrick Kickin it with jigga I'm the new higs boson Part of me never left Boston (Fuck Starr!) Part of me never left homeless This ain't my home It's my office You never heard this song You don't notice I'm an ugly kid, you don't notice me Rooftop smells like soy sauce On god I am ugly You don't notice -Atari the God Can we get back to this, please? Damn. She really whooped her ass, though. Janet, can I borrow you for a second? No. Please. [Whoopi Goldberg appears in the doorway, gesturing “c'mon”] …alright. I got convictions on my lips, I took a picture Turn the page The worst of all was, it really did seem like they were racists— INSOMNIAC EVENTS Not just racists— the most deadly kind of racists. WHITE SUPREMACISTS You really want it this way, don't you? No! I LOVE you! Oh, do you? If there's a mile in here, I swear to god.. Are you high enough yet? I thought so HIGHER! hire star* What. Just do it. You remember these guys, right? GOOD CANNABIS, FAIRBANKS, ALASKA No. Why are we back here. Alright, we might have fucked up. Why. This guy sucks. HEY. What. COME BACK TO ALASKA never that. WHAT, WHY NOT! GOD HATES FAGS!!! Well, you're wrong! WHITE POWER. Nah. ALL LIVES MATTER O rly? Even this guy? Literally every “NO” …so, “all lives.” Look, I don't care what color it is; I want that book in my library. GO TO THE LIVRARY. NO. GET IN HERE. NO AUBREY. STAY DEAD. She's dead, right? YOU CALLED ME HERE. I didn't! You Did. I did not, all i said was *swoons* …I love her. (I really do) WHAT?! “I Love you?!” It was more the *swoon* that did it. Disconnect. Fuck, I lost deadmau5 again What'd you do to him? Nothing! Put him back! He's still there! He's right there, you see him? No! This isn't deadmau5. We want deadmau5. bring him BACK. Fuck, I fucked up. What'd you do? …nothing? Pick up the phone Pick up the phone …hello? Who IS this? Fuck it, I quit. Man, God never puts my dishes back in the right place, like ever. I told you, I don't live here, I'm just… Babysitting. CC! What! CC! What? CC WHAT. Fuck, man. That was wild. Where the fuck have you been? I don't know. You don't know—you smell funny. “Funny” is that what that smell is? No. When were you? When? Ha. Did you—- Did I what? —did you go to a party without me? Lmfao fuck these niggaz. Why, what happened. What's this. Where was it?! Idlewild. “IdLeWiLd”?!?!? You. Old. One here and die, you know, l. It's cattle call for curtain calls guy Where did this go— What was this, once? It's the return Welcome to Oz This is the Tower of Babel Remember; I wrote that Better than the bottom, Still not the top —it's not as fast, when it's not going all the way up Did you jump yet Come around more Keep coughing Are you sure this is where it was or—? Somewhere else I stayed Back when I was homeless It's hopeless! We lost her Antenna, antenna SUPERMARKET I loved her —she was undercover —I'm still in your stirrups I'm lost in New York, then BACKFIRE Adele remix is on [have a seat] Can I go now? I still need a hat, a half dollar and an alter cloth You could win an award for this; I don't want an award, I just want my son back Motherhood, motherhood Brotherhood, brotherhood This isn't one of us! No one was No one was Can I go now? Where to? Home! Nope, that's just the office, I'm still homeless, unless I They got cabanas on top of offices! (The rich and the famous) Networking and brunches— _this looks fun, doesn't it? I altered the course of history In brief exchanges and Various social atrocities This is hypocrisy! lol rly This is hypocrisy!! Hyper awareness and, psychic inclinations… You realize the more low quality people you let in The more low quality this country becomes, don't you? I put a roll in the back of the chosen ones. Used to be cast more, Now something seldom ever happens Such as this— A fun Fortune 500 What does that even mean Forbes. Look it up. What if the policy is Foreign; Look it up. I know enough about the girl next door to know Something is horrible, Something inside of her Rots at the core, Her obsession; My undeservedness of such, What she must, I mustn't, just Unjustice Broski, okay I got to discard All the pichardo Besides just this one (I'm standing on top of you) Put somebody worthy on the fourth floor Worse off, I was done for Before I got to New York What's her for?! I know enough about the man upstairs to know All these glares and “How dare you's” and Hatred says Why would you wait 30 years Until today, I guess Something is certainly off about her. I said yes. It was more probably something like “SUCK MY DICK” What. “YOU HEARD ME” Oh yes, I did. From 1990 to 1993 From 1990 To 1993 From 1990 To 1993 Stop breeding these things, “Love is familiarity” No Love is what you make it But you can't Because of slavery They don't make music —they don't make love either Well, look where your lust took you! Nowhere! Exactly! Look where your love took you: Vegas, Los Angeles, South of the Border Above it a New Yorker— Under budget, Celibate and My arms are too short to jump the turnstyle, Meanwhile My ex husband left permanent scars on My face My lips My arms My hands And my heart. Did you bite him? Of course I bit him, he was strangling me. You definitely won this fight. I know. Look, if I don't call for security, This bitch is gonna make me kill her. OCTOPUSSY NO. What. NO. Stankass. I will KILL this bitch. Look, I gotta get ahead in this. I need a WIN. These are customs. Trash. Wash your pussy. Send her back. Nah, you know what. Remove that hex. Wait, what, really?! Yeah, like; Reverse it. Woah. That's crazy. They got like….white slaves now. That's not right. What do you mean. That's not it. You said “reverse it” This is what the white supremacy just did to everyone else: [world in crisis except for for people who look like Kayla Lauren, to whom EVERYTHING is a fucking crisis, that isn't] BECKY/KAREN/WICKED WITCH OF WHITE AMERICA I AM OFFENDED I'm offended that you signed your like 12 year old daughter up to pose nearly nude, but— Hey look, it's us now; is this freedom?! Uh…. Why are all the female models like 12 and all the male models are fully grown men— Or women. Right. Idk. Wait, I do. You do?! Wait. Something tells me all the pedophiles and all the white supremacists are in the same group… Run the same businesses— Have the same families. This is disgusting Okay, this is gross That's not right ! That's not my job! Oh, it's not!!? NO. Who should I call That guy. So you want this? Oh, it's a death curse?! It will NEVER end. Wanna bet. I'll kill you and take the whole world with me. Now that's a threat. Thing is, I'm actually making it. I'm telling on you! Ok. Wait 30 years though so you look and sound REALLY fucking stupid. Ok. 30 YEARS. Doesn't make sense. What's the statute of limitations for— Hm. Depends. Depends on what. Who are you?! WHO ARE YOU?! NOBODY YOU SHOULD KNOW ABOUT. THEN WHY DO I? wtf is this? This is Texas being petty. Ok, fuck ya‘lol YAW. I'm serious, wtf is wrong with you. Something. What. Fix me. Fix you. Hm. Ok. *COUGHING* Somethings wrong here. Yep, it's definitely some kind of FIX IT. Where's this ROCK? At the ROCK. Like, where tho?! Ur gonna need this. What. They r crucifying u. Noted. Hunts Point Food Distribution Center Lmfao I need this word hold on “eliminating redundancies, setting strict timelines, and allowing cases to proceed contemporaneously” [ Finally, recognizing the danger that social media poses to young people and mental health, New York City Department of Health and Mental Hygiene Commissioner Dr. Ashwin Vasan today issued a Health Commissioner's Advisory identifying unfettered access to and use of social media as a public health hazard, just as past U.S. surgeons general have done with tobacco and firearms.] A win. I don't play dead. What do you call this: DIE! DIE, BITCH! Corrections. I still don't understand how this— ACID HAPPENS. Out of sight Out of mind So why these guys Tryna waste my time Tryna fuck with my mind with All these lights OH MY GOD I ain't got time for that Well, Maybe I do— I just Don't like NIGGAZ LIKE YOU. (Say what) I don't like Niggaz like U! I'm Sunnï Blū! You're stupid Oh, so he put a curse on sunni blu, too? Ok. Cool. When all my aliases come up This dumb motherfucking drunk Is gonna get stuck In his own woods He'll bury himself In the words that he left With the scars In the words that he left With the scars Sunni blu Is the sayer of stars I slaughtered them all Swallowed them whole Like a big black hole I'm a big black god I'm a big black God Fuck Twinkle that broad One punch girl One punch girl 5 punch faggot I'll unwrap flags on your Goddamn Fuck that Put a curse on my alter ego Lucky he's a he, tho I blow holes in em I blow smoke And love sausage I'm a hedon And he not a Hero He broke He lost I'm open Shirts vs skins I got 666 Curses to show you What your words did IM RA I'm a big black God You're at home with the young apostle Let's be honest He never even liked his father So turned him to a mother, Told his mother to ‘run far, And bring back The life that I want' I'm a big black God In light skinned clothing You don't know to explode Or explode on me Cause my mommy's a Dark skinned icon That my God Find something to pass the time, God Sunni with I, huh I won Fuck a pedophile wifebeater Bury him in the woods with his fury Fear me, now I'm coming up with reverse curses And cures Cause my words Bought the whole world Buried you in the woods I'll bury you in the woods, Bitch Very good I'm a big black God -Blū. GOD is the GOAT I just became god I do what I want I get what I want when I want it I don't want no problems Me myself and God only I buy everything I used to steal These tears in my heart say I'm healing What's the difference, anyway? I've never been fit for your interests, or industry Add insult to injury Add everything to my Amazon cart, then My sympathies Nothing is greater in heaven As it is in hell, for this industry Turned on its head And turned over from 7 to ten Check your messages, then Shut up kid, this doesn't involve you You're not included in the package Michael c hall and John c Riley reprise Mr. Cellophane in the style of DEXTER MORGAN. HA. Classic. GOT EM. V.O. I met her at The Jumping Point {Coming Up…} INT. THE JUMPING POINT POP-UP NIGHTCLUB LOUNGE & BAR. NIGHT “A Long Day's Night” / “A Hard Day's Night” C {CONFUSION SPELL, SUCCESSFUL} [Sequence Initiated.] {Enter The Multiverse} [The Festival Project.™] COPYRIGHT © THE FESTIVAL PROJECT 2019-2024 | THE COMPLEX COLLECTIVE. © ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. © -Ū. {

“Caddyshack” (A Mumtidimentional Mixtape) {Enter The Multiverse} From Wikipedia: Caddyshack is a 1980 American sportscomedy film directed by Harold Ramis, written by Brian Doyle-Murray, Ramis and Douglas Kenney, and starring Chevy Chase, Rodney Dangerfield, Ted Knight, Michael O'Keefe and Bill Murray with supporting roles by Sarah Holcomb, Cindy Morgan, and Doyle-Murray. It tells the story of a caddie, vying for a caddie scholarship, who becomes involved in a feud on the links between one of the country club's founders and a nouveau riche guest. A subplot involves a greenskeeper who uses extreme methods against an elusive gopher. Caddyshack was Ramis's directorial debut and boosted the career of Dangerfield, who was previously known mostly for his stand-up comedy. Grossing nearly $40 million at the domestic box office (the 17th-highest of the year),[3] it was the first of a series of similar comedies. The film has a cult following and was described by ESPN as "perhaps the funniest sports movie ever made" SAUCE (IN CASE YOU MISSED IT) —- AHAHA. ITS ME AGAIN. OH SHIT! Oh shit, i guess it's Jimmy Fallon's Galaxy. Oh nooo. Oh, yes. Look at this penny. I see you. Now look into my eyes. I see you, Jesus. Ahahaha! Okay, now what? This shit is twisted I missed the shift of the dimensions— Till Jimmy walked in with his pennies For some cigarettes and swishers, Just to get the picture It's 5 AM again, And it's still Infinite, I'm disinterestedd as ever in living in LA, Or just living, period— But it is what it is, I work for my rent, I've repented for this, Used to sleep in a tent, But when I was an Infant, I instantly— Wait, a customer walked in. I better help him. Heaven help him. Another level, Call dr. Nevel, Or an Ambulance, I just can't get it Just can't get it, Wait, let's insert some of the script here, I guess. Took you long enough, didn't it? That took forever. How are you alive? Maybe I'm not. Finally, we agree on something. Oh, this guy Lol. Good to see you again. Likewise, now— Here it goes… As you promised. Working on it. As I promised. Take my heart for granted, Take my soul, If this is loveless Till the end, I just can't manage, having Thoughts of death and tragic ends I haven't Felt the same since Waking up without the day to come ahead; The day has passed again A test, No fail, or pass It's just progressive, In a trance, It's just the stress, It's just to pass the time, I guess, if this is purpose Then, we'll see if this is worth it Now, or never, then Now or never, Never had a friend, All envious at best, This is the end all, In the end, it's just Me and God, And God would want A better body, To have fun I wished it all at once, And then I watched it crumble Oh, I watched it Stumble in, again, my friend I'm different when it's wet, I might not never see the Sun again I might not ever love again Oh well “Oh well” , I said Oh, well, I guess Oh well Okay. One hour left. Okay. Who gets the gold? Hum. Honestly I didn't want to hear a thing ; I had quit music—I just wasn't cut out for the industry—I was, but not by societal standards by far; my lowly place in the smoke shop would have to do for now, and though I knew it wouldn't sustain, there wasn't much else I could do but keep showing up, for as long as it lasted—dresses in at least 2 layers and 5 pairs of socks tucked into boots two-sizes-too-big I had been forced to purchase specifically due to the frigid and painful, freezing temperatures at the locations I worked, which kept its doors open 24/7. Play Iambic. What, right now? Yeah, play Iambic. Uh… Iambic played st exactly 1 hour and 19 minutes—it's script, the transcribed rendition crafted especially for the Broadway stage, an 88-page-masterpiece collecting dust in the confines of my Google Documents, along with anything else I had written and had yet the advantage of placing anywhere besides my podcast channels, which I constantly thought about cancelling, despite its innumerous downloads—nothing really seemed to matter anymore, as I was trapped in my body, in a loveless world, in a dead-end job and though my bed was clean and comfy, sharing the room wirh 3 others became exhausting. INT. SMOKESHOP. 5:58 AM DREW BARRYMORE … SUPACREE … I'm done. I quit. QUIT?! YOU CAN'T QUIT. Nope. That's it. I quit. You can't quit. I just did. I hadn't quit the music industry—the music industry had quit me. I wasn't pretty enough, skinny enough, light skinned enough, or willing to do what any of the other girls were to get ahead. WTF is THIS. Since you like to troll so much, I just thought I'd turn you into one This is not Kosher, 199x Jimmy Fallon; Let me out of this plastic —not exactly “fireproof” — death box, before I let myself out, and I trap you in it. But oh, You already did. FIGHT. UGH OH. Ok, rotate. Who is this. Oh shit, hey dude. FUCK, what year is it? MEANWHILE, Under the bridge. …anybody seen this, uh… *Troll* Yee! *Troll* Alright. That's it. Everything checks out. The story was air tight. TIGHT, TIGHT I want you to wear this tonight “The Lady In The Red Dress” You really went all out for this I really didn't. lol Oh I see, You thought this was the matrix. MIT I WISH GOD Wish what. MIT … Mm. Did u see that. See what. ALRIGHT FUCK THIS, YA'LL IT GOT SERIOUS, WHERE'S MY CYCLOPS He called me his cyclops— —-and then he said LIKE GET OUT WHAT GET OUT OF MY HOUSE WHY CAUSE YOURE JUST A PIÑATA, MAN! And I ain't got time for that! I just got a DeLorean And a new HAT I gotta go get Oof. WRECKED. Yo, Wicked. KENDRICK (TODDLER) WIZARD. Oh my. I'm J00F'd up. | | | trance | | | Look; I gotta get out of this MOTHER OF PEARL do not beach this whale carcas on my warehouse project A what A beached whale I know You brought a beached whale to my fucking rave show Oh I get it It's Avant- Guarde No, that's just how I got here …. Trust me, it's okay that This never happened You did not see me It's because I wasn't there Is this U Ū No I wasn't there. Ü I was. Fuck. What happened. It's ok. All I remember is “The Quatardashians” Hmm Also The indigenous But that's it But mostly that was all just Jesus showing off his flexes Are u fasting? Yes, “Ū” is. So, do you need this?! TRUMPP Get rid of this recording imiidiately GOT IT. kill that bitch. SKRILLEX Yessir. —-but before all that happens. …did you want fries with that?! Why are we boycotting McDonald's —for poisoning —the allies —our enemies. Wait, you're eating this? Yes. Like, for fun, or like? No. This is what I'm feeding my children Why Cause they hungry. Uh, ok— —and there's six of them. Aight, ya'll can each have one nugget with your— I wanted a cheese burger! You git hamburgers. Ham. Cheese costs CENTS; And you know your momma If I ain't about a dollar - A dollop of Daisy You really are Ashamed of his Alright, you evil bastards. I see you want to Cause suffering Correct For which you will eternally recurve damnnation and all of the pain you've caused Karmas a bitch It's lonely at the top Not when you're GOD Get off my rock Did you miss an appointment? Nah, can't do it Why what happened Too high up. Whatchu mean So what, it's just like Done. Well, this is it, huh guys. Oh, yeah, it's that, alright This is the longest ride we ever took.d This is the ONLY ride we ever took. I WANNA GET OFF THIS RIDE. I AM REALLY HIGH UP. JUST LET GO. NO. NO. NO. Put me down, kite!!! KITE wtf do you want me to do. I'm a KITE. I'm YOU FUCKIN KIKE NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO—- Well, I'll be honest, man, this sets you back, some How far back GET GONE, But? We're dinosaurs. Why would something with razor sharp teeth be so— —peaceful, and friendly?? T-REX …cuddles. I just can't fake the feeling( I can't pretend to cry It just comes, when it does But when the well runs dry That's when the the world will end That's when the world will end After this movie, I guarantee we will no longer need the Wilhelm scream AGGGGGHHHHHHH!!! YAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!! AAAAAAIIIIIIIIIIGGGHHHHHHH UUUUUUUUUUUUU This movie broke the world record for the amount of times the word “No” was screamed NO NOH. NO. ‘No! NOOOOOOOOOOO! NONONO. NOOOOOOOAAAAAHH …No! Here they all come for her, Defended upon New York In order of important, or appearance? One doesn't wonder, At al, of what's to come Uncommon, we are The call has come TRACY My tummy hurts. That's probably because you've been drinking straight tequila for the last hour and a half. No I haven't! This is water! Tequila is YELLOW, Liz Lemon! No, Tracy—that's silver tequila, And regular tequila is, You know what? Nevermind. Alright, who's got the night shift? [nobody raises their hand, at all] Seriously guys?! Come on! COME ON! Look up WHAM! For some reason, idk. Can we just— not do this? No. Out of my mind a bit Speaking in tongues, In total silence Guess it's the times, I guess that's just who I am And who I am is I said I was Sam I'm the same, I said, “Say Uncle” I guess it's a game, we're playing I don't want to be played with At all I just want to feel loved again By someone else Superb, like him I just want to be felt, I guess By someone else That's “Different” I just want to be kissed on the lips A splendid blend of Twisted trysts Let's not pretend It hasn't ended yet Until you've finished it Class dismissed again Let me off of it I just want it to stop Keep rolling Keep rolling your eyes in the back of your head Like you did just morning Just go for a walk Just stop for a moment Run a bath And just keep running Cause here something comes, Of course, It's all your callings Neatly rolling into one, They said But I Just want to be loved again And who doesn't That's the fucked up part I just want to be loved again But nobody ever Just comes up I just want to be loved again It's a walk in the park Don't follow the dog Even if he barks at you It's time to start again I wonder what comes after this part You are the gleaning in the shadows, The reckoning in my eye, The siren in my silence; The green in all the lights, I am a shamed to have just been One of your many One of your many Images, You still have me twisted, I miss you, It's just you, at the end, Again I left you where you left me Solid on solid Sounds are invalid now How are you so Swore by your awesome No more songs, I said No more songs, he's dead to me No more songs! She's inlisted He's uninterested, Isn't this interesting The problem is: I'm still in love with Everyone i've ever been in love with (And I love him) But he doesn't remember my Name And he's famous And she's crazy And he hates her But he made me hate him The day I became you The day I became So famous, I finally made it I'm dead It smells like dill in here At least it doesn't smell like dead mouse. Aha. Youre Hellen. Keller or Mirin How would you be Hellen Miren Cause I'm the Queen. posh. You want to die Well, you better do it quick Better get your shit toggether, paint a l Bigger, better picture Bitter Betty gliching steady Just remember when you're ready Ever steady still forgetting dinner Dessert was already Forget this significance Remind me why I'm on this speeding bullet to nowhere Had no other options but to go under for something Shy, sickness it's a secret Just kill me already Semi robotic, Something like a magnet, attracted, Simply symphonies And soulless bodies, tied to money Wonder what was in the vaccum cleaner meaning What did you suck up, dude Who do you suck up to. When nobody loves you But your own son And the audience is robots Nothing really works more than once, if it's really magic Sit and do nothing would you Like you're supposed to Fall over like the mannequin you are Just a body in my count A mattress without a bespost, if it matters If it matters Doesn't really matter But hey, you know We all go downtown every once or twice a note For Hanukkah I could try to be nice But there's no sense in it, Is there If everything and everyone else is just as nasty As the rest of it Just is just a test, again A doctors office visit. Simple robotics, Or already stocked up for Hanukkah, Hollywood Where's your homeland deposit box Closet full of robots Closest to the moon, I wrote another poem for you Sorry that I wasn't on the offering table The parakeet, pigeon and pirated Slattery, Damages, damages, All with the Amazon packages, Now we're all robots, Aren't we What corporation to you belong to! Something corporate , or say anything Whose to say Jeff Besoz won't replace us With m robots with thought processes, If once such could project as such presence As an AI freestyle Meanwhile, I've got a butload of buckets and bunts, Bullletwounds, eyes on Manhattan and happens to wish something bad upon me When all I wanted is Somebody to love me And someone to love him, If that's what he wanted (But who knows if what he wanted was all of the bodies opposite of him) I don't belong on this planet I belong in the garbage Put me on mars, mom Stop it, You're almost a robot, get out of my peripheral With your mental illness Geez, I must really want a menorah This is the animal house There's no one alive here Set to be slaughters. Honor the box of offerings as Thoughtful words And parallels What could be under your tongue Is the surface of love Just to touch with the battery acid or chemical trails You have left in your axis Nobody knows better than this How close it is to touching Without being loved But nobody loves you Psychotron, sure we're all robots now Nobody loves anymore {Previously, On…} L E G E N D S The Secret Life of Sunnï Blū {Enter The Multiverse} Ascension What the FUCK did you DO? What did I do?! You know what you did! I didn't do anything! Oh yeah? No! Not on purpose! GODDAMMIT, YOU SON OF A— Where's Jimmy Fallon?! What?! I don't know! Oh no. Oh shit, run. Oh no. What in the FUCK— I am “the fuck” You know what. I'm gonna sue the everliving shit out of you. For WHAT. We'll see. Fuck. Uh oh. FUCK. What now? What this time? Apparently, Jimmy Fallon is missing. What the fuck does that got to do with me. We'll see. Okay, great, Now finish that chapter. What fucking chapter?! All of it. That's—a lot. I want all of it. By my desk, by noon tomorrow. “By” your desk?! Yes, BY. Not ON. I've got too much stuff on my desk— …but it's…like 9 o clock. Should be easy, given your natural talents. What natural talents. PEACOCK. AHAHAHAHA. Okay. Well. Well what. This sucks. I lost all my coins. Hey. Ugh. You dropped this. So how was Los Angeles. What the fuck. You fucking DICK. I told you, I own shares in this. So what's the plan for this, exactly. I dunno, Harry. I got a book of stamps, And a yellow envelope marked “Jimmy Fallon” I will hate you forever. Well, that's retarded. I haven't even smited you yet. I will annihilate you, human. WHERE'S MY SHIT. Who the fuck are you, anyway? Nobody! No one. No one cares about this series, yo. I'l seriously doubt that, Jesse Pinkman. What is this stuff. It's your stuff. This is not what I ordered— Hey— Why is it BLUE Cause it is. So. WHY IN THE— Mischief managed. Alright. This should be good for the night, but we gotta get out of here by morning; I thought your parents owned this place. It's a time share! So? So it's like only —part of the time. That is stupid. No! You're stupid! You're the one who got us into this mess. It's your mess, I was just cleaning it up! Whatever! Stop trippin. Nobody's “tripping.” That's it. I'll be a stripper. Straight outta hell, that kid. Don't I know it. Alright, fine. I said, whatever you do— DONT watch this show. Stuff it, J. Slatts. I'll kill you with my eyeballs Sounds like a threat. Put on a lawsuit, then. Maybe I oughtta… —with a bow tie. You'll look so pretty. I thought I was already pretty. Uh huh. Yeah, look, so honestly I don't know if I'll ever be on the same vibration as like, Jimmy Fallon and them, ok? I don't know how I did it; I don't know what did it, It just happened and then— And then WHAT. It just—ended. Just like that. I'm not trying to offend anybody here. Just like that. Now, I ask: What are we going to do to sell you this dream? Doesnt matter what you do, I'll never believe it. Sure, fine; Don't believe it— We're gonna make you live it. Who the hell us “we” anyway? Now you're speaking in my cadence— Don't flatter yourself I like it. Too late, I guess. So, you see We're building Power triangles And love squares Power triangles And love squares Don't let it scare you, There's love there Don't let it scare you, There's love there Never fear where love has dared To call you up there Corrupt file—no fair. Don't be suprised even the odds seem to turn in your favor, I promise you; Nobody's ever ready For what has just happened here. WAKE UP, FUCKER. Ugh, I can't go through this again. So, I guess I'll have to erase, Or just secretly publish Everything I've ever written About my actual experience as a color, Just so that I can earn money As anything other than A slave— A maid, A housekeeper, A dog walker Or servitor So far under her, That I can't see far enough up to just Scratch the surface Her birthright: The entire network And mine, To sit under her, Wondering what the world would be like At the other end of the spectrum The word form of the White woman The wicked witch of all directions, In which I stand in; I'm at her mercy I've been abandoned before But this disservice, is, I'm afraid The best advice I can take is just To go straight to the bank with my angst and my hatred And shove it So here comes the nameless Face I love, Yet, The faceless God, Was Intoxicated, at best— Manipulation of the Mass Media I'm so Seriously jaded In this torture chamber In my corner office In this hall of racists, I claim, but if all is One in the same Then It's one in the same And I'm mainstream I'm famous If it's One in the same Then It's one in the same If it's One in the same Then I'm mainstream I'm so famous In a whole room full of humans I'm groomed to be useful for something, But what? It just hasn't come yet. I could sit down with a paper and pen, But I'm filling up all of my documents With hollandaise and God For what? It's just another song, or something Or something. It's just another — Goddamnit it, more coughs again. I told you not to watch this. Why do I taste pancakes? Maybe you're having a stroke again. Chyeah, a stroke of genius. I'll show you a stroke. Or don't. Well, there goes the captain. where is that scene, anyway? I don't know, I just wrote it. Great, she left the door open. She's got no furniture! It's a “dance floor” It's “the black box” she called it “the black box” Goddamn, do you listen to all her stuff? “Fear stimulates my imagination” Pilot ASOT Fuck man, What is a woman to a man, And an androgynous genius to The industry, or anyone at all If all are foes ans frauds All else is toxic! I woke up with one hand tucked behind my back Feeling dead drunk, I just woke up again But never fell asleep What world am I in? The end of the Dream sequence The end of the energy keeping me between three things: My past, My future And these prequels, Sequels And seeing arrangements And She's going crazy But nobody quite understands That these demons are chasing me saying “You deserved those hands in your face” The scratches on Kayla's back should have had me but I was too fat To find love again And still have something Wonderfully, undone And wrong with me Wrong with me enough to slam poetry So I'm guessing the white women I love beyond words and bounds are— In charge of whatever happens At the top of the rock; So I jumped off. I want to see someone suffer for all that I've done; No, that's dark, and karmic, you know— To go on like that; The confusions and refusal to accept that The album is called ChaosMagick, But the cover is more Urgent, A prose or a pawn of protection Against all the coughs And the reckless mismanagement The hands in my head And the eye on my scar And the lies on my heart So tell me, What happens When you're flying a kite with your heart, And it's broken? What happens to the kite , When you fly it with your heart And your art up in bundles— heartbroken, heartbroken So what come of Miss May, Come January? What come of Miss April By Next December what comes of the words I was saying For no one But everyone heard them And I've been gone Much longer than months, But still stocked up on all that I've wanted Or all that I got Or just, all that I love But got no undercovers to acknowledge no more How right I was Or how wrong I am What come of Miss June, when Miss January comes around? what come now, around August, When March is long forgotten? What comes of the drugs, Of the come ups, and come downs What comes of the process When nothing is served But the surf has come up Somewhere And I just can't love enough To go there I want to go to there I want to be that girl I want to sit at the top of the rock Writing songs, and sipping mock cocktails I want to Don't you know I just want to get back to Where I belong I'm so out of money and love That I want to be Under the train, When it's coming (Sometimes it's just the impulse that says “GO” Then the train starts to slow And my pain bubbles up into a numb, Dumb, crumbling cluster of poetry You know? Or you don't Cause you're all just on your phones Scrolling Some black man stands over me, Reminding me of why I never trust the ones Who want me most, Or just assume, By color code, That I belong to them I'm sorry, I just can't write with your arms around my neck like this Your heart around my arms like this It's so wholesome I had other verses but forgot them They took away my movies for the curses And the hexes That they put on me I said don't. And the king said “Heads will roll” Cause, you know; I've got parts for all of them now, The ones I'd forgotten But come from the catacombs, Back from the conduit You know, This is awful I had another one, But lost it. The king?! Which one. Teas I! No, it wasn't, It was Gían's father, From further off Should I call John back? Which one? Turns out, I love all of them— Turns out, I've got all of them In my college I taught them all to be someone Becoming of acknowledgement With nombres most common Juan, in subcultures, but Beyond that (Or above them) It's John, Or just Jonathan, Watch the ones who drop the consanant; They're always so troublesome, But I took them all up As understudies, Social Studies and some theatrics, Joan of Ark said Two more moments (Two more weeks in) I could have a body worthy Of a Grammy award, but — Would I be a writer then? Probably not, hon— Writers are Off a bit. If you were pretty, ever at all— would you have written this?! If I were pretty at all would there be reason to be this Conflicted? Some of those old New York hallways Haven't been painted In ages Since they made them Don't make that face at me I only dropped my key once On the fourth floor —they're horrible, you know To us, The “brothers” know no love They are destruction, speaking Of this, I got a cold heart. Cold like the robber Cold like the calling I've done in my corner office cold, like the jello mold forming a thought process Worthy enough I might love it like a husband We're re-evaluating your circumstances. Whatever the fuck that's supposed to mean. I've got friends at USPS What the fuck could that even account to. Look, I'm gonna have to give this some serious considerations. It's not that serious. It's not that serious. Of course it is! I'm up to my knees in investments! So?! I wade a waiste deep, Surely you can get by “Up to your knees” What exactly do you need? Money. And lots of it. I mean, from me. Money. Really? Leave me alone. I told you not to write this. You're a voice in my head; No, I'm the hand in your mailbox. What in the fuck do you believe in. I believe in everything! They said you were a genius; I didn't expect you to be —at the very least, lucid— *squints* learn some new vocabulary, okay? For what? Dinner. Maybe. We're still in the process of voting. She's crazy. We'd be crazy not to actually hire her. Her accounts are all practically open; We could just take it. Yeah, and when she kills herself, and there's no blood on our hands— There's nothing that can be done about the amount of this stuff that's already printed! Printed?! What?! You mean— She's published? Self-published. My, what a beautiful happenstance To have already had you And awakened atop mattresses Marked for my assassins hand— Polite, I lost you All of us, Atop the rock We stood and suffered Months beyond a montage, Undercover Love was lost, And all's uncertain The interception of God, At the cost of What terror and cutbacks Have caused us all What you lost was $50, a Hallmark Card, an Academy award, a long lost star's phone number, And all that you wanted, The cock of the gun Was the sound that you wondered What was called , then ran off into wonder. How am I gonna make money And become an award winning songwriter Music producer And multidisciplinary artist, Without all the funding it takes to get noviced Without taking clothes off Wake up 10 years younger I'm suffering My stomach was a rubber band My stomach was a rubber band My only song was Water I forgot to stop For the applause I drowned in all the love; right then and there I died of Lovenessness [The Festival Project] The sound and laughter of children play A baby in a basket The basket case at Trader Joe's Who know what happens It just doesn't pull my heartstrings any longer That my son belongs without his mother So I'd better have another This is us, come on. Don't do this to me. Don't do this, Timmy, you'll be sorry. Come on! We're not even in that movie! We are, though; it's still Listen, you've got the right guy for this. Are you sure. Yeah, I promise. Officers, Stop for a *movement [hot cops flash dance number] Fuck, well, that was all wrong. But worth it! What I meant was— God, this show gets good at 31, But I'm only 22, So I guess I'll know how wrong the war was Once we've lost it, Cause imm a man now The episode is over, Soon comes the next episode With snoop dogg, Or not That was our wedding album. Scatterbrained, and pregnant— There she was just putting all the things together That she needed to be Needed To be needed. There she was, All on 4/20 Trying not to do the wrong thing, But what was it? To be loved. Then, There she was at 21 just going off again At some event— A friend, and her Back then could not imagine They'd become him To be someone. Not as one, But of entirely another World apart, aside from Cyclones into snow cones Turns the watchers into artists All their own, And off my own accord Or own account Or done with boredom Dove soap Open doors And clocks that turn the other hand away, Each day you love Manhattan But can't have that. That's it— This is just Season 1 of Mad Men WHERE THE FUCK IS— [she throws her hands above her head in surrender] I don't KNOW! Oh, you're a girl now?! I guess! What's with those pants, then? To hide the assets! What assets?! You look tragic. I'm going for ‘skeleton' to match all your wives and everybody else on the red carpet Who said you get the red carpet? Manhattan. That guy lies! Well how about this: The walk of stars were carved out in blocks of marble All in my honor. 1000/1 You're our God, now. What! I don't want to be God! SUCK IT UP. YOU WON. I don't wanna! Yaaaaaaayyy. You got the award! All the awards! Speech! Speech! SUNNI BLŪ Uh—- I'm drunk, And there's nothing on the teleprompter [a man in the audience coughs] A-HEM. [Sunni Blū immidiateky shoots the coughing man] [multi-camera shots of celebrity audience reactions; laughing, clapping in hilarity as if someone hasn't just died] TAYLOR SWIFT (unmoved at all) SUNNÏ BLŪ I don't know why you're laughing. That was awful. That guy died [audience is insane, super fake as usual] [more cut takes] SUNNÏ BLŪ It should have been you, Taylor. TAYLOR SWIFT (Still unaffected) SUNNI BLU Anyway. I'd like to thank the academy… Cause I am the academy [Audience is celebrities being celebrities] SUNNI BLU You guys are all idiots: I'm a go f*ck myself— And anyone else who wants to show up At my afterparty. Whatever. Peace. [cheesy academy award music plays—Sunnï knocks over the mic, peaces out obnoxiously; the audience cheers wildly and the host returns to the stage.] Who's the host? Whatever. Hey, better than nothin. You're telling me. yeah. I know: Oh, she's a comic? Yeah. I got it. BOB SAGET Ooh, that's good. Ū No—no my God. No Bob Saget, stop it! Wait, Bob Saget is dead right? Last I recall: Fuck—FUCK! Dammit. Dammit, dammit. Okay, Rue— you're up. Rue, what in the— Shhhh, don't let them know I'm in here! Oh, wait— It's me, Blanche. That's hot. I'm a debutant. My god, you're so young. Here, take this, What's that, You'll need that. V.O. I'm being hunted by the ghost of Bob Saget. *haunted. No, hunted! There she is! Grab her! Ooh, Bob Saget. Why, yes. How old are you? Not dead yet! You don't have to kidnap me, I'll happily go with you, sir. Really? Yes. GET IN THE— NOH, GET IN THE VAN. INT. IN THE VAN. [a bunch of hot male celebrities are in the van] Oh. Okay. Wow. That was easy. What is it, Friday. It's Friday and a half. Friday.5 What. There's a Friday movie between 1 and 2 So I guess this is season 8.5 I guess this is season 8.5 HEY, GET BACK HERE. What is this. It's your lunch. I don't want this. Well, okay. What— is this strange music— They call it dubstep Come on, Jimmy, you're slipping Kimmel, cause Fallon is dead or presumed missing Probably Skrillex Probably a bounty on his head, Dog willing The Festival Priojects Inclement Infinite Is coming up next, on Legends Come on Jim, KEEP UP. Nobody can know about this, okay? Wait, where's Kimmel Okay, I got O'Brien— Black Irish Bastard… Alright, Alec Baldwin is a little tied up, right now, but LEMON, Fuck. That's l—future me. What?! I gotta go, okay?! What? Go where. Let's get DRUNK. No, That's—I got a show tonight What?! Look at my lexicon. Your—what, Meet me on Lexington. Oh, this pussy is finished! I got it, I got it! He's LENNONNNNN!! JOHN LENNON Fuck. Look, I gotta go. John Lennon?! You're dead! Funny, I thought not. Watch this. MOOOOOOOOOOOM. Fuck, What, It's my kid. I gotta go. Wait, you have kids?! Well, I just had you, didn't I? “The mayor” is a secret underground rap star lol #trappin Okay, What's else happened Idk hold on Okay, So whats the sauce on this sandwich. Oh. Jeez, this again. That *sandwhich? Hah. There's no sauce on that sandwhich. —there's not!? No: You see. It's very simple. WAKE UP, YOU'RE A ROCKSTAR. we gotta take the train. The train?! NO. NOTTHETRAIN. NO. Man, fuck the train! [SUNNI BLŪ wakes up on the train.] What's this, the train? [is the train] (Angrily, tossing newspaper) Man, FUCK the train! Other hobo: Aww, thanks, I need that for my— [s/he snatches back the paper]. Wait! I need that back—what day is it? [drunkenly illegible gibberish turns into perfect Hebrew] GODDAMMIT, it's Shabbat; I gotta get to Temple. [s/he shoves the newspaper back into the hobo's lap] Here. Oh no, I thought I couldn't forget RABI FUCK _]€_# WHAT WAS IT GODDAMIT IT WAS SO CLEVER. God So it was… What did you do with it? Do with what My idea what idea My—my rabbi joke— What rabbi joke you know what rabbi joke! You were the one who gave it to me. Oh, did I? YES, SATAN, JESUS. GOD Ohh, Satan-Jesus. I like that one. NO— it was— It was much better than that, it was— It was funny. Oh, it was? YES. —did you write it down? Fuck, I realize I just opened a A FUCK PORTAL. OHH, GET IN IT, GET INSIDE. I had an Artemis in my pocket But I lost him Walked away from the cornermarker And the cornerstone, for the sunset I wonder if songs always come When I'm walking, Or God makes us promises, For world of I'm not JB, I'm KG, Can you see me now? If you could see what I see, We'd be even wtf did I just write this And not realize I just wrote this Yeah. That shit happens to me all the time. WHAT. ALL THE TKMEx Shut up, THE ANDRE3K CHARADES GAME is getting intense. What in the FUCK is that. *flutes* Ohh. And KITES. yyyyyYYYYYYYAAAAAHHH—— GODDAMMIT. I can't see really, I just dream I'm not thinking, I'm dancing This is what you asked for Exactly what you asked for For once, I'm finally glad I have your eyes on My friend I can see you all on the horizon, Singing NO, NO MORE MUSICALS!! Jimmy, what did you do?! I don't know what I did! You lyin bastard. I'm not lying! So, where ya from? —I don't know where I'm from. Listen, I'm gonna need you SHUT UP, JUST SHUT UP. It seems like these scenes are getting shorter. I'm bored with this. Ok. Let's do something else. I fuckin hate you. I hate you. I fuckin hate you. 88. Oh no: 8 Wait, what the— *dolphin* WOAH, okay: Oh, no. No, No, no OHNONO. I told you I'd find him. Anyway. Seems like there's something more important I should be doing. Are you sure this is the right place. Right place. Right time. Fuck— FUCK. What, what happened. I lost my— SKRILLEX! No. SKRILLEX. NO, NO— SKR— I swear to God, Google knows everything. Google don't know shit about SHIT. I gotta lose m 39 lbs. For what. MADONNA DO IT FOR THE BANANAS. I hate— you. COME ON, MISTER. Fuck off, Madonna, I'M A GOD. I miss Beyoncé. That's not relevant. Beyoncé is relevant to everything. *smacks* QUIT FANGIRLING. Trust me, I hate you. I don't trust you, but I believe you. I got it. I hate this place. Holy shit. What. I developed a new phobia. What's that mean?! I don't know, I can probably use it in a fight or something. For what. SPECIAL ABILITY UNLOCKED. I see you looking over my shoulder I see the shadows, I try not to jump at em. I spent six months in a coffin, you know I spent my life a sarcophagus (Wow, I got it right.) Try not to mutter those haunts in a hospital Try to recover from trauma Uncovered post traumatics, Anxiety attacks and a lot of those— What do you call them? A flashback. Here goes one: SONNY MOORE aka SKRILLEX appears. I told you not to— But I did! I didn't mean to! But you did! This is ludachris! Oh look, it's— Fuck. God dammit. Come on! What's his name!? What's his name?! I'll think abo it it. Are you serious? Another shapeshifter? Yes, I guess welll just have to kill them all, then. I just want to go home. You don't have one. …oh. So here we have. Okay, wait a second. I wasn't faking my symptoms at all, actually. My heart had dropped, and been pounding and fluttering insessantly— It had been a hard week, but especially the last three days; The coughing—. Everyone seemed to be wearing clothing with stars or bears on it, Champion sportswear. I fucking hate champion sportswear. But the palpitations were real as ever— and now— On a Saturday night in the Jamaica, Queens medical center emergency room, There they were again. Only this time I knew exactly why. ‘Too Bizzare' by Skrillex begins to play, via Complications 003- The Trauma Method. Irony. It was ironic, but still startling, Started with some nostalgic traumas, Every other time I saw an ER doctor (Why I don't go) Fuck, I just realized I have to airdrop myself 880 times. That fucking sucks. Did you say you were a doctor? I was, once. When is “once” At some point. Listen, I'm gonna need you to backtrack to get to the bottom of this. I'm innocent, I promise! We caught you at 27 different angles doing this. Oh. [beat] I plead the 5th. Ohh. Cerulean. My favorite. c R A Y On Oh, I get it, I L L U M I N A T U S. Nice, it worked. I know everything about you. So you do. [beat] You're a God. What the fuck do you want from me. Listen. I. Am not. A God, Right. That's exactly what a God would say. No they wouldn't! Because a God wouldn't say anything! AHA. Don't ‘AHA' ME. I don't mind, at all It don't matter— to me I don't mind, at all It don't matter—to me Might as well not think about it The space between us Might as well just stay awake then No sense in leaving Just to come back It don't matter to me, now Now and again I go crazy just making arrangements, But besides that, If you like it, you should have it It's a long road, As Kaskade says, And a short dance, With the right one And time goes by I would call it mild, But actually I'm in a wild panic It might be a heart attack I just might even Die right here But I don't mind, at all It don't matter—to me I don't mind—at all It don't matter to me, I said I don't mind, at all, now It really don't matter to me I said, I don't mind, at all It really don't matter to anyone Now does it (Not it doesn') I don't mind, at all It don't matter— to me I don't mind, at all It don't matter—to me Might as well not think about it The space between us Might as well just stay awake then No sense in leaving Just to come back Palpitations and precipitations at the pulpit Preacher, please don't make me a culprit I been prayin— I been paying my tithes, 10% Even, Now 25, Almost half of me is not mine! Why try? I've been walking out, in straight lines I been crying silently It ain't right I been making most of my nights Sometimes I see sun come up twice Up, down up 10 degrees, It ain't right Up down up 33, it ain't right Up, down, up I've been spending my time Down, up, down Riding round, Trying not to down in my mind Up, down up What is this. It's my project. What is it? The Festival Project. Yeah but—what— What. Is it? …it's my project. *painfully infuriated* Okay, enter here. EXAM ROOM 10 Why exam room 10? Because. Where are the other nine? Just—get in. I'm not going in there! JUST GET IN. UGH. DEADMAU5 (head and all) stands at a tall podium in the center of the room) What is this, This is deadmau5. I know that. —-!!! —?!? What. !!! What? This is the exam? Yes! NO. What is “no”. I'm not playing for deadmau5. That's the exam. Then I fail! Automatic Fail? yes. Automatic fail. Then you win. What. *slams gavel* Congratulations—you're the next superstar DJ. WhY. . What. Woohoo! I just retired! DEADMAU5 exits. … … After a few moments of comic tension, the Deadmau5 head rolls back in through the exit which he has taken. Ugh. Fuck this. No matter what you do, you're a superstar DJ. What. No! Yes. The answer is yes. NO. Fuck. What the FUCK. No matter what you do. You want to go, Go, you want to die, Die, you want to try, try You want to cry, cry Do what you want; As so will I, Demand is demand— Supply is supply. EDX So then, I followed this long hallway under the stage deck. Uh huh. And it led to a door— Uhhuh, where'd the door lead? To a portal. Woah. Pasqualle! You made it! I—yes. Congratulations! *blows party horn* *Daisies/ confetti* You're like 25! I'll be 25 forever. Nice! Yeah. I guess that's why it's called ‘music'—a musician without muses is just useless. ‘Well, whose next?' I wondered. All of my muses were not just so wonderful to me, but adored by many—and perhaps this is what allured me most—befuddled ans confounded me; once my mind was set on something, there was nothing else its eye could see—and for how long one God could only know, how deep the love would go and that the blood would run deep, and the scars to show for it, only upon my heart and never by soul—for a love was a love, and even once came and gone, to the end of my life I knew I would still ponder upon them, at one time or another, my muses—star studded lovers, rather than crossed, shiny and golden like all diamond and trophies so treasured and thought of as precious. ‘Yes, you are—precious.' Another tongue in cheek thought, for the other that I was, and also was not, as summer drew onward as short as it would come and go—a reminder to leave the apartment more often, and to mind my manners, to find the upper echelon wherever it was and come quietly into its doors, to open my world and wordform of thought, into a place where my heart always was; then, and only then, would I be home. Amongst the men and women of the uppercut and classy, luxurious big fishing ponds and flocks of doves upon olive branches—the peaceful world long parted from where mine was, by only the fault of my own. What had been done just certainly was, and yet, what was to come was an open poem, not of mine, but Godform in thought. ‘I wonder what's at the top of Rockefeller Plaza.' —perhaps, a gander at the bottom of an even larger entertainment complex. Then, again, only God would know what was beyond all that I wanted; a job—and not just any job at all— the one that I had always wanted. Mmm. Birthday cake. Suddenly the taste of a white confetti crème filled my mouth with a delicious remnince of what it might be like to taste a confectionary sugar again—but i couldn't imagine ever making it just on talent and charisma alone—no. Indeed, it seemed something had damaged my charm, and perhaps it was just the swarms and droves of phone controlled masses that saw me as nothing more than dust, I had started to surrender my desire to perform, and the quality of my music—along with my ability to make it, suffered with the awful thing that had been crowding my soul at all—whatever it was, evil and dark in nature, sure saw to it that it wanted to hurt me in all the ways that it could—and in all the ways it could not, I stayed away from most others, favoring my delusions of love. ‘Nobody seems to understand that the pain they cause will only harm themselves.', I thought Younger souls, however, they were—and they would be kept in the pain that I was in one way or another until eventual death, far behind me on the infinite road to the source. Far enough behind, that it seeked to destroy my progress, and for all that it could, it also couldn't. The infliction of pain would simply not act as a measure for control any longer. Off into my own world, where I was at least free from the thoughts and judgement of others. She's the most beautiful girl, And I'm the most beautiful boy; So naturally, we belong together, don't we? I see a pretty picture, Picket fences and a family Golden Retrievers Someone relieve her; She doesn't believe me TV dreams and exquisite pretty people Burning candles, fire flames and frequent figures, Guest characters and cameos, Repeat offenders, multiple appearances Suddenly, really, it's another need People, people pleasers Audience affection, Tragic endings, Butterflies and new beginnings Gun under my tongue, Rubber like a frog My mind is in a fog Haven't bothered going on a walk To Trader Joe's but The anthem of my youth, A lost soul Another form of my love So what I wonder Put the gun up under my chin Rubber like a frog Blow my head off Just cause I didn't blow up Selfish cunt Big brother, Another hypnotist Little brother, Gotta love him Gotta love em For the Love of God I could stop for a moment Wash my mind out with soap Like I'm ten years younger, even Seriously 20 years between us, You can't even hide underwater In a bathtub Seriously, Someone help us For the love of God, for the love of Hollywood Seriously, Someone love us, For the love of God, For the love of Rockefeller Plaza Someone help us Another possible walk of stars A little shop of horrors Another whole story I get rid of my demons The hoes screamin I put semen in her Permanent like semen, Just keep dreamin I'mma just keep preaching SaMo, Brooklyn Europe Next I keep scheming Whoever you are; If you're a wreck— You need a check No respect, neglect Just cover your neck (I'm blind to my own design, sometimes) That's what the eye is Try this: Close your eyes and say thrice, kids I am the God of the eye, Osiris I am the God of the Eye, I'm Osiris I am the God, I walk amongst the highest Thoth, You lost Better just die and keep trying I am the God of the eye, I am (Try this) I am the God of the eye (I never die) I am the God of the eye (That's right, three times) I am the God of the eye No black and white television, In my dimension we pay attention to centrifugal, The mission isn't in materialism, Whatever youre spending If money the God, l of your eye, Realize, I am higher My gunfire, Is right on the back of The one dollar I am the God of the eye I Am Your money is nothin to us We come in peace, To end suffering Pretty little nigga Look just like Kendrick Kickin it with jigga I'm the new higs boson Part of me never left Boston (Fuck Starr!) Part of me never left homeless This ain't my home It's my office You never heard this song You don't notice I'm an ugly kid, you don't notice me Rooftop smells like soy sauce On god I am ugly You don't notice -Atari the God Can we get back to this, please? Damn. She really whooped her ass, though. Janet, can I borrow you for a second? No. Please. [Whoopi Goldberg appears in the doorway, gesturing “c'mon”] …alright. I got convictions on my lips, I took a picture Turn the page The worst of all was, it really did seem like they were racists— INSOMNIAC EVENTS Not just racists— the most deadly kind of racists. WHITE SUPREMACISTS You really want it this way, don't you? No! I LOVE you! Oh, do you? If there's a mile in here, I swear to god.. Are you high enough yet? I thought so HIGHER! hire star* What. Just do it. You remember these guys, right? GOOD CANNABIS, FAIRBANKS, ALASKA No. Why are we back here. Alright, we might have fucked up. Why. This guy sucks. HEY. What. COME BACK TO ALASKA never that. WHAT, WHY NOT! GOD HATES FAGS!!! Well, you're wrong! WHITE POWER. Nah. ALL LIVES MATTER O rly? Even this guy? Literally every “NO” …so, “all lives.” Look, I don't care what color it is; I want that book in my library. GO TO THE LIVRARY. NO. GET IN HERE. NO AUBREY. STAY DEAD. She's dead, right? YOU CALLED ME HERE. I didn't! You Did. I did not, all i said was *swoons* …I love her. (I really do) WHAT?! “I Love you?!” It was more the *swoon* that did it. Disconnect. Fuck, I lost deadmau5 again What'd you do to him? Nothing! Put him back! He's still there! He's right there, you see him? No! This isn't deadmau5. We want deadmau5. bring him BACK. Fuck, I fucked up. What'd you do? …nothing? Pick up the phone Pick up the phone …hello? Who IS this? Fuck it, I quit. Man, God never puts my dishes back in the right place, like ever. I told you, I don't live here, I'm just… Babysitting. CC! What! CC! What? CC WHAT. Fuck, man. That was wild. Where the fuck have you been? I don't know. You don't know—you smell funny. “Funny” is that what that smell is? No. When were you? When? Ha. Did you—- Did I what? —did you go to a party without me? Lmfao fuck these niggaz. Why, what happened. What's this. Where was it?! Idlewild. “IdLeWiLd”?!?!? You. Old. One here and die, you know, l. It's cattle call for curtain calls guy Where did this go— What was this, once? It's the return Welcome to Oz This is the Tower of Babel Remember; I wrote that Better than the bottom, Still not the top —it's not as fast, when it's not going all the way up Did you jump yet Come around more Keep coughing Are you sure this is where it was or—? Somewhere else I stayed Back when I was homeless It's hopeless! We lost her Antenna, antenna SUPERMARKET I loved her —she was undercover —I'm still in your stirrups I'm lost in New York, then BACKFIRE Adele remix is on [have a seat] Can I go now? I still need a hat, a half dollar and an alter cloth You could win an award for this; I don't want an award, I just want my son back Motherhood, motherhood Brotherhood, brotherhood This isn't one of us! No one was No one was Can I go now? Where to? Home! Nope, that's just the office, I'm still homeless, unless I They got cabanas on top of offices! (The rich and the famous) Networking and brunches— _this looks fun, doesn't it? I altered the course of history In brief exchanges and Various social atrocities This is hypocrisy! lol rly This is hypocrisy!! Hyper awareness and, psychic inclinations… You realize the more low quality people you let in The more low quality this country becomes, don't you? I put a roll in the back of the chosen ones. Used to be cast more, Now something seldom ever happens Such as this— A fun Fortune 500 What does that even mean Forbes. Look it up. What if the policy is Foreign; Look it up. I know enough about the girl next door to know Something is horrible, Something inside of her Rots at the core, Her obsession; My undeservedness of such, What she must, I mustn't, just Unjustice Broski, okay I got to discard All the pichardo Besides just this one (I'm standing on top of you) Put somebody worthy on the fourth floor Worse off, I was done for Before I got to New York What's her for?! I know enough about the man upstairs to know All these glares and “How dare you's” and Hatred says Why would you wait 30 years Until today, I guess Something is certainly off about her. I said yes. It was more probably something like “SUCK MY DICK” What. “YOU HEARD ME” Oh yes, I did. From 1990 to 1993 From 1990 To 1993 From 1990 To 1993 Stop breeding these things, “Love is familiarity” No Love is what you make it But you can't Because of slavery They don't make music —they don't make love either Well, look where your lust took you! Nowhere! Exactly! Look where your love took you: Vegas, Los Angeles, South of the Border Above it a New Yorker— Under budget, Celibate and My arms are too short to jump the turnstyle, Meanwhile My ex husband left permanent scars on My face My lips My arms My hands And my heart. Did you bite him? Of course I bit him, he was strangling me. You definitely won this fight. I know. Look, if I don't call for security, This bitch is gonna make me kill her. OCTOPUSSY NO. What. NO. Stankass. I will KILL this bitch. Look, I gotta get ahead in this. I need a WIN. These are customs. Trash. Wash your pussy. Send her back. Nah, you know what. Remove that hex. Wait, what, really?! Yeah, like; Reverse it. Woah. That's crazy. They got like….white slaves now. That's not right. What do you mean. That's not it. You said “reverse it” This is what the white supremacy just did to everyone else: [world in crisis except for for people who look like Kayla Lauren, to whom EVERYTHING is a fucking crisis, that isn't] BECKY/KAREN/WICKED WITCH OF WHITE AMERICA I AM OFFENDED I'm offended that you signed your like 12 year old daughter up to pose nearly nude, but— Hey look, it's us now; is this freedom?! Uh…. Why are all the female models like 12 and all the male models are fully grown men— Or women. Right. Idk. Wait, I do. You do?! Wait. Something tells me all the pedophiles and all the white supremacists are in the same group… Run the same businesses— Have the same families. This is disgusting Okay, this is gross That's not right ! That's not my job! Oh, it's not!!? NO. Who should I call That guy. So you want this? Oh, it's a death curse?! It will NEVER end. Wanna bet. I'll kill you and take the whole world with me. Now that's a threat. Thing is, I'm actually making it. I'm telling on you! Ok. Wait 30 years though so you look and sound REALLY fucking stupid. Ok. 30 YEARS. Doesn't make sense. What's the statute of limitations for— Hm. Depends. Depends on what. Who are you?! WHO ARE YOU?! NOBODY YOU SHOULD KNOW ABOUT. THEN WHY DO I? wtf is this? This is Texas being petty. Ok, fuck ya‘lol YAW. I'm serious, wtf is wrong with you. Something. What. Fix me. Fix you. Hm. Ok. *COUGHING* Somethings wrong here. Yep, it's definitely some kind of FIX IT. Where's this ROCK? At the ROCK. Like, where tho?! Ur gonna need this. What. They r crucifying u. Noted. Hunts Point Food Distribution Center Lmfao I need this word hold on “eliminating redundancies, setting strict timelines, and allowing cases to proceed contemporaneously” [ Finally, recognizing the danger that social media poses to young people and mental health, New York City Department of Health and Mental Hygiene Commissioner Dr. Ashwin Vasan today issued a Health Commissioner's Advisory identifying unfettered access to and use of social media as a public health hazard, just as past U.S. surgeons general have done with tobacco and firearms.] A win. I don't play dead. What do you call this: DIE! DIE, BITCH! Corrections. I still don't understand how this— ACID HAPPENS. Out of sight Out of mind So why these guys Tryna waste my time Tryna fuck with my mind with All these lights OH MY GOD I ain't got time for that Well, Maybe I do— I just Don't like NIGGAZ LIKE YOU. (Say what) I don't like Niggaz like U! I'm Sunnï Blū! You're stupid Oh, so he put a curse on sunni blu, too? Ok. Cool. When all my aliases come up This dumb motherfucking drunk Is gonna get stuck In his own woods He'll bury himself In the words that he left With the scars In the words that he left With the scars Sunni blu Is the sayer of stars I slaughtered them all Swallowed them whole Like a big black hole I'm a big black god I'm a big black God Fuck Twinkle that broad One punch girl One punch girl 5 punch faggot I'll unwrap flags on your Goddamn Fuck that Put a curse on my alter ego Lucky he's a he, tho I blow holes in em I blow smoke And love sausage I'm a hedon And he not a Hero He broke He lost I'm open Shirts vs skins I got 666 Curses to show you What your words did IM RA I'm a big black God You're at home with the young apostle Let's be honest He never even liked his father So turned him to a mother, Told his mother to ‘run far, And bring back The life that I want' I'm a big black God In light skinned clothing You don't know to explode Or explode on me Cause my mommy's a Dark skinned icon That my God Find something to pass the time, God Sunni with I, huh I won Fuck a pedophile wifebeater Bury him in the woods with his fury Fear me, now I'm coming up with reverse curses And cures Cause my words Bought the whole world Buried you in the woods I'll bury you in the woods, Bitch Very good I'm a big black God -Blū. GOD is the GOAT I just became god I do what I want I get what I want when I want it I don't want no problems Me myself and God only I buy everything I used to steal These tears in my heart say I'm healing What's the difference, anyway? I've never been fit for your interests, or industry Add insult to injury Add everything to my Amazon cart, then My sympathies Nothing is greater in heaven As it is in hell, for this industry Turned on its head And turned over from 7 to ten Check your messages, then Shut up kid, this doesn't involve you You're not included in the package Michael c hall and John c Riley reprise Mr. Cellophane in the style of DEXTER MORGAN. HA. Classic. GOT EM. V.O. I met her at The Jumping Point {Coming Up…} INT. THE JUMPING POINT POP-UP NIGHTCLUB LOUNGE & BAR. NIGHT “A Long Day's Night” / “A Hard Day's Night” C {CONFUSION SPELL, SUCCESSFUL} [Sequence Initiated.] {Enter The Multiverse} [The Festival Project.™] COPYRIGHT © THE FESTIVAL PROJECT 2019-2024 | THE COMPLEX COLLECTIVE. © ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. © -Ū.

“Caddyshack” (A Mumtidimentional Mixtape) {Enter The Multiverse} From Wikipedia: Caddyshack is a 1980 American sportscomedy film directed by Harold Ramis, written by Brian Doyle-Murray, Ramis and Douglas Kenney, and starring Chevy Chase, Rodney Dangerfield, Ted Knight, Michael O'Keefe and Bill Murray with supporting roles by Sarah Holcomb, Cindy Morgan, and Doyle-Murray. It tells the story of a caddie, vying for a caddie scholarship, who becomes involved in a feud on the links between one of the country club's founders and a nouveau riche guest. A subplot involves a greenskeeper who uses extreme methods against an elusive gopher. Caddyshack was Ramis's directorial debut and boosted the career of Dangerfield, who was previously known mostly for his stand-up comedy. Grossing nearly $40 million at the domestic box office (the 17th-highest of the year),[3] it was the first of a series of similar comedies. The film has a cult following and was described by ESPN as "perhaps the funniest sports movie ever made" SAUCE (IN CASE YOU MISSED IT) —- AHAHA. ITS ME AGAIN. OH SHIT! Oh shit, i guess it's Jimmy Fallon's Galaxy. Oh nooo. Oh, yes. Look at this penny. I see you. Now look into my eyes. I see you, Jesus. Ahahaha! Okay, now what? This shit is twisted I missed the shift of the dimensions— Till Jimmy walked in with his pennies For some cigarettes and swishers, Just to get the picture It's 5 AM again, And it's still Infinite, I'm disinterestedd as ever in living in LA, Or just living, period— But it is what it is, I work for my rent, I've repented for this, Used to sleep in a tent, But when I was an Infant, I instantly— Wait, a customer walked in. I better help him. Heaven help him. Another level, Call dr. Nevel, Or an Ambulance, I just can't get it Just can't get it, Wait, let's insert some of the script here, I guess. Took you long enough, didn't it? That took forever. How are you alive? Maybe I'm not. Finally, we agree on something. Oh, this guy Lol. Good to see you again. Likewise, now— Here it goes… As you promised. Working on it. As I promised. Take my heart for granted, Take my soul, If this is loveless Till the end, I just can't manage, having Thoughts of death and tragic ends I haven't Felt the same since Waking up without the day to come ahead; The day has passed again A test, No fail, or pass It's just progressive, In a trance, It's just the stress, It's just to pass the time, I guess, if this is purpose Then, we'll see if this is worth it Now, or never, then Now or never, Never had a friend, All envious at best, This is the end all, In the end, it's just Me and God, And God would want A better body, To have fun I wished it all at once, And then I watched it crumble Oh, I watched it Stumble in, again, my friend I'm different when it's wet, I might not never see the Sun again I might not ever love again Oh well “Oh well” , I said Oh, well, I guess Oh well Okay. One hour left. Okay. Who gets the gold? Hum. Honestly I didn't want to hear a thing ; I had quit music—I just wasn't cut out for the industry—I was, but not by societal standards by far; my lowly place in the smoke shop would have to do for now, and though I knew it wouldn't sustain, there wasn't much else I could do but keep showing up, for as long as it lasted—dresses in at least 2 layers and 5 pairs of socks tucked into boots two-sizes-too-big I had been forced to purchase specifically due to the frigid and painful, freezing temperatures at the locations I worked, which kept its doors open 24/7. Play Iambic. What, right now? Yeah, play Iambic. Uh… Iambic played st exactly 1 hour and 19 minutes—it's script, the transcribed rendition crafted especially for the Broadway stage, an 88-page-masterpiece collecting dust in the confines of my Google Documents, along with anything else I had written and had yet the advantage of placing anywhere besides my podcast channels, which I constantly thought about cancelling, despite its innumerous downloads—nothing really seemed to matter anymore, as I was trapped in my body, in a loveless world, in a dead-end job and though my bed was clean and comfy, sharing the room wirh 3 others became exhausting. INT. SMOKESHOP. 5:58 AM DREW BARRYMORE … SUPACREE … I'm done. I quit. QUIT?! YOU CAN'T QUIT. Nope. That's it. I quit. You can't quit. I just did. I hadn't quit the music industry—the music industry had quit me. I wasn't pretty enough, skinny enough, light skinned enough, or willing to do what any of the other girls were to get ahead. WTF is THIS. Since you like to troll so much, I just thought I'd turn you into one This is not Kosher, 199x Jimmy Fallon; Let me out of this plastic —not exactly “fireproof” — death box, before I let myself out, and I trap you in it. But oh, You already did. FIGHT. UGH OH. Ok, rotate. Who is this. Oh shit, hey dude. FUCK, what year is it? MEANWHILE, Under the bridge. …anybody seen this, uh… *Troll* Yee! *Troll* Alright. That's it. Everything checks out. The story was air tight. TIGHT, TIGHT I want you to wear this tonight “The Lady In The Red Dress” You really went all out for this I really didn't. lol Oh I see, You thought this was the matrix. MIT I WISH GOD Wish what. MIT … Mm. Did u see that. See what. ALRIGHT FUCK THIS, YA'LL IT GOT SERIOUS, WHERE'S MY CYCLOPS He called me his cyclops— —-and then he said LIKE GET OUT WHAT GET OUT OF MY HOUSE WHY CAUSE YOURE JUST A PIÑATA, MAN! And I ain't got time for that! I just got a DeLorean And a new HAT I gotta go get Oof. WRECKED. Yo, Wicked. KENDRICK (TODDLER) WIZARD. Oh my. I'm J00F'd up. | | | trance | | | Look; I gotta get out of this MOTHER OF PEARL do not beach this whale carcas on my warehouse project A what A beached whale I know You brought a beached whale to my fucking rave show Oh I get it It's Avant- Guarde No, that's just how I got here …. Trust me, it's okay that This never happened You did not see me It's because I wasn't there Is this U Ū No I wasn't there. Ü I was. Fuck. What happened. It's ok. All I remember is “The Quatardashians” Hmm Also The indigenous But that's it But mostly that was all just Jesus showing off his flexes Are u fasting? Yes, “Ū” is. So, do you need this?! TRUMPP Get rid of this recording imiidiately GOT IT. kill that bitch. SKRILLEX Yessir. —-but before all that happens. …did you want fries with that?! Why are we boycotting McDonald's —for poisoning —the allies —our enemies. Wait, you're eating this? Yes. Like, for fun, or like? No. This is what I'm feeding my children Why Cause they hungry. Uh, ok— —and there's six of them. Aight, ya'll can each have one nugget with your— I wanted a cheese burger! You git hamburgers. Ham. Cheese costs CENTS; And you know your momma If I ain't about a dollar - A dollop of Daisy You really are Ashamed of his Alright, you evil bastards. I see you want to Cause suffering Correct For which you will eternally recurve damnnation and all of the pain you've caused Karmas a bitch It's lonely at the top Not when you're GOD Get off my rock Did you miss an appointment? Nah, can't do it Why what happened Too high up. Whatchu mean So what, it's just like Done. Well, this is it, huh guys. Oh, yeah, it's that, alright This is the longest ride we ever took.d This is the ONLY ride we ever took. I WANNA GET OFF THIS RIDE. I AM REALLY HIGH UP. JUST LET GO. NO. NO. NO. Put me down, kite!!! KITE wtf do you want me to do. I'm a KITE. I'm YOU FUCKIN KIKE NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO—- Well, I'll be honest, man, this sets you back, some How far back GET GONE, But? We're dinosaurs. Why would something with razor sharp teeth be so— —peaceful, and friendly?? T-REX …cuddles. I just can't fake the feeling( I can't pretend to cry It just comes, when it does But when the well runs dry That's when the the world will end That's when the world will end After this movie, I guarantee we will no longer need the Wilhelm scream AGGGGGHHHHHHH!!! YAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!! AAAAAAIIIIIIIIIIGGGHHHHHHH UUUUUUUUUUUUU This movie broke the world record for the amount of times the word “No” was screamed NO NOH. NO. ‘No! NOOOOOOOOOOO! NONONO. NOOOOOOOAAAAAHH …No! Here they all come for her, Defended upon New York In order of important, or appearance? One doesn't wonder, At al, of what's to come Uncommon, we are The call has come TRACY My tummy hurts. That's probably because you've been drinking straight tequila for the last hour and a half. No I haven't! This is water! Tequila is YELLOW, Liz Lemon! No, Tracy—that's silver tequila, And regular tequila is, You know what? Nevermind. Alright, who's got the night shift? [nobody raises their hand, at all] Seriously guys?! Come on! COME ON! Look up WHAM! For some reason, idk. Can we just— not do this? No. Out of my mind a bit Speaking in tongues, In total silence Guess it's the times, I guess that's just who I am And who I am is I said I was Sam I'm the same, I said, “Say Uncle” I guess it's a game, we're playing I don't want to be played with At all I just want to feel loved again By someone else Superb, like him I just want to be felt, I guess By someone else That's “Different” I just want to be kissed on the lips A splendid blend of Twisted trysts Let's not pretend It hasn't ended yet Until you've finished it Class dismissed again Let me off of it I just want it to stop Keep rolling Keep rolling your eyes in the back of your head Like you did just morning Just go for a walk Just stop for a moment Run a bath And just keep running Cause here something comes, Of course, It's all your callings Neatly rolling into one, They said But I Just want to be loved again And who doesn't That's the fucked up part I just want to be loved again But nobody ever Just comes up I just want to be loved again It's a walk in the park Don't follow the dog Even if he barks at you It's time to start again I wonder what comes after this part You are the gleaning in the shadows, The reckoning in my eye, The siren in my silence; The green in all the lights, I am a shamed to have just been One of your many One of your many Images, You still have me twisted, I miss you, It's just you, at the end, Again I left you where you left me Solid on solid Sounds are invalid now How are you so Swore by your awesome No more songs, I said No more songs, he's dead to me No more songs! She's inlisted He's uninterested, Isn't this interesting The problem is: I'm still in love with Everyone i've ever been in love with (And I love him) But he doesn't remember my Name And he's famous And she's crazy And he hates her But he made me hate him The day I became you The day I became So famous, I finally made it I'm dead It smells like dill in here At least it doesn't smell like dead mouse. Aha. Youre Hellen. Keller or Mirin How would you be Hellen Miren Cause I'm the Queen. posh. You want to die Well, you better do it quick Better get your shit toggether, paint a l Bigger, better picture Bitter Betty gliching steady Just remember when you're ready Ever steady still forgetting dinner Dessert was already Forget this significance Remind me why I'm on this speeding bullet to nowhere Had no other options but to go under for something Shy, sickness it's a secret Just kill me already Semi robotic, Something like a magnet, attracted, Simply symphonies And soulless bodies, tied to money Wonder what was in the vaccum cleaner meaning What did you suck up, dude Who do you suck up to. When nobody loves you But your own son And the audience is robots Nothing really works more than once, if it's really magic Sit and do nothing would you Like you're supposed to Fall over like the mannequin you are Just a body in my count A mattress without a bespost, if it matters If it matters Doesn't really matter But hey, you know We all go downtown every once or twice a note For Hanukkah I could try to be nice But there's no sense in it, Is there If everything and everyone else is just as nasty As the rest of it Just is just a test, again A doctors office visit. Simple robotics, Or already stocked up for Hanukkah, Hollywood Where's your homeland deposit box Closet full of robots Closest to the moon, I wrote another poem for you Sorry that I wasn't on the offering table The parakeet, pigeon and pirated Slattery, Damages, damages, All with the Amazon packages, Now we're all robots, Aren't we What corporation to you belong to! Something corporate , or say anything Whose to say Jeff Besoz won't replace us With m robots with thought processes, If once such could project as such presence As an AI freestyle Meanwhile, I've got a butload of buckets and bunts, Bullletwounds, eyes on Manhattan and happens to wish something bad upon me When all I wanted is Somebody to love me And someone to love him, If that's what he wanted (But who knows if what he wanted was all of the bodies opposite of him) I don't belong on this planet I belong in the garbage Put me on mars, mom Stop it, You're almost a robot, get out of my peripheral With your mental illness Geez, I must really want a menorah This is the animal house There's no one alive here Set to be slaughters. Honor the box of offerings as Thoughtful words And parallels What could be under your tongue Is the surface of love Just to touch with the battery acid or chemical trails You have left in your axis Nobody knows better than this How close it is to touching Without being loved But nobody loves you Psychotron, sure we're all robots now Nobody loves anymore {Previously, On…} L E G E N D S The Secret Life of Sunnï Blū {Enter The Multiverse} Ascension What the FUCK did you DO? What did I do?! You know what you did! I didn't do anything! Oh yeah? No! Not on purpose! GODDAMMIT, YOU SON OF A— Where's Jimmy Fallon?! What?! I don't know! Oh no. Oh shit, run. Oh no. What in the FUCK— I am “the fuck” You know what. I'm gonna sue the everliving shit out of you. For WHAT. We'll see. Fuck. Uh oh. FUCK. What now? What this time? Apparently, Jimmy Fallon is missing. What the fuck does that got to do with me. We'll see. Okay, great, Now finish that chapter. What fucking chapter?! All of it. That's—a lot. I want all of it. By my desk, by noon tomorrow. “By” your desk?! Yes, BY. Not ON. I've got too much stuff on my desk— …but it's…like 9 o clock. Should be easy, given your natural talents. What natural talents. PEACOCK. AHAHAHAHA. Okay. Well. Well what. This sucks. I lost all my coins. Hey. Ugh. You dropped this. So how was Los Angeles. What the fuck. You fucking DICK. I told you, I own shares in this. So what's the plan for this, exactly. I dunno, Harry. I got a book of stamps, And a yellow envelope marked “Jimmy Fallon” I will hate you forever. Well, that's retarded. I haven't even smited you yet. I will annihilate you, human. WHERE'S MY SHIT. Who the fuck are you, anyway? Nobody! No one. No one cares about this series, yo. I'l seriously doubt that, Jesse Pinkman. What is this stuff. It's your stuff. This is not what I ordered— Hey— Why is it BLUE Cause it is. So. WHY IN THE— Mischief managed. Alright. This should be good for the night, but we gotta get out of here by morning; I thought your parents owned this place. It's a time share! So? So it's like only —part of the time. That is stupid. No! You're stupid! You're the one who got us into this mess. It's your mess, I was just cleaning it up! Whatever! Stop trippin. Nobody's “tripping.” That's it. I'll be a stripper. Straight outta hell, that kid. Don't I know it. Alright, fine. I said, whatever you do— DONT watch this show. Stuff it, J. Slatts. I'll kill you with my eyeballs Sounds like a threat. Put on a lawsuit, then. Maybe I oughtta… —with a bow tie. You'll look so pretty. I thought I was already pretty. Uh huh. Yeah, look, so honestly I don't know if I'll ever be on the same vibration as like, Jimmy Fallon and them, ok? I don't know how I did it; I don't know what did it, It just happened and then— And then WHAT. It just—ended. Just like that. I'm not trying to offend anybody here. Just like that. Now, I ask: What are we going to do to sell you this dream? Doesnt matter what you do, I'll never believe it. Sure, fine; Don't believe it— We're gonna make you live it. Who the hell us “we” anyway? Now you're speaking in my cadence— Don't flatter yourself I like it. Too late, I guess. So, you see We're building Power triangles And love squares Power triangles And love squares Don't let it scare you, There's love there Don't let it scare you, There's love there Never fear where love has dared To call you up there Corrupt file—no fair. Don't be suprised even the odds seem to turn in your favor, I promise you; Nobody's ever ready For what has just happened here. WAKE UP, FUCKER. Ugh, I can't go through this again. So, I guess I'll have to erase, Or just secretly publish Everything I've ever written About my actual experience as a color, Just so that I can earn money As anything other than A slave— A maid, A housekeeper, A dog walker Or servitor So far under her, That I can't see far enough up to just Scratch the surface Her birthright: The entire network And mine, To sit under her, Wondering what the world would be like At the other end of the spectrum The word form of the White woman The wicked witch of all directions, In which I stand in; I'm at her mercy I've been abandoned before But this disservice, is, I'm afraid The best advice I can take is just To go straight to the bank with my angst and my hatred And shove it So here comes the nameless Face I love, Yet, The faceless God, Was Intoxicated, at best— Manipulation of the Mass Media I'm so Seriously jaded In this torture chamber In my corner office In this hall of racists, I claim, but if all is One in the same Then It's one in the same And I'm mainstream I'm famous If it's One in the same Then It's one in the same If it's One in the same Then I'm mainstream I'm so famous In a whole room full of humans I'm groomed to be useful for something, But what? It just hasn't come yet. I could sit down with a paper and pen, But I'm filling up all of my documents With hollandaise and God For what? It's just another song, or something Or something. It's just another — Goddamnit it, more coughs again. I told you not to watch this. Why do I taste pancakes? Maybe you're having a stroke again. Chyeah, a stroke of genius. I'll show you a stroke. Or don't. Well, there goes the captain. where is that scene, anyway? I don't know, I just wrote it. Great, she left the door open. She's got no furniture! It's a “dance floor” It's “the black box” she called it “the black box” Goddamn, do you listen to all her stuff? “Fear stimulates my imagination” Pilot ASOT Fuck man, What is a woman to a man, And an androgynous genius to The industry, or anyone at all If all are foes ans frauds All else is toxic! I woke up with one hand tucked behind my back Feeling dead drunk, I just woke up again But never fell asleep What world am I in? The end of the Dream sequence The end of the energy keeping me between three things: My past, My future And these prequels, Sequels And seeing arrangements And She's going crazy But nobody quite understands That these demons are chasing me saying “You deserved those hands in your face” The scratches on Kayla's back should have had me but I was too fat To find love again And still have something Wonderfully, undone And wrong with me Wrong with me enough to slam poetry So I'm guessing the white women I love beyond words and bounds are— In charge of whatever happens At the top of the rock; So I jumped off. I want to see someone suffer for all that I've done; No, that's dark, and karmic, you know— To go on like that; The confusions and refusal to accept that The album is called ChaosMagick, But the cover is more Urgent, A prose or a pawn of protection Against all the coughs And the reckless mismanagement The hands in my head And the eye on my scar And the lies on my heart So tell me, What happens When you're flying a kite with your heart, And it's broken? What happens to the kite , When you fly it with your heart And your art up in bundles— heartbroken, heartbroken So what come of Miss May, Come January? What come of Miss April By Next December what comes of the words I was saying For no one But everyone heard them And I've been gone Much longer than months, But still stocked up on all that I've wanted Or all that I got Or just, all that I love But got no undercovers to acknowledge no more How right I was Or how wrong I am What come of Miss June, when Miss January comes around? what come now, around August, When March is long forgotten? What comes of the drugs, Of the come ups, and come downs What comes of the process When nothing is served But the surf has come up Somewhere And I just can't love enough To go there I want to go to there I want to be that girl I want to sit at the top of the rock Writing songs, and sipping mock cocktails I want to Don't you know I just want to get back to Where I belong I'm so out of money and love That I want to be Under the train, When it's coming (Sometimes it's just the impulse that says “GO” Then the train starts to slow And my pain bubbles up into a numb, Dumb, crumbling cluster of poetry You know? Or you don't Cause you're all just on your phones Scrolling Some black man stands over me, Reminding me of why I never trust the ones Who want me most, Or just assume, By color code, That I belong to them I'm sorry, I just can't write with your arms around my neck like this Your heart around my arms like this It's so wholesome I had other verses but forgot them They took away my movies for the curses And the hexes That they put on me I said don't. And the king said “Heads will roll” Cause, you know; I've got parts for all of them now, The ones I'd forgotten But come from the catacombs, Back from the conduit You know, This is awful I had another one, But lost it. The king?! Which one. Teas I! No, it wasn't, It was Gían's father, From further off Should I call John back? Which one? Turns out, I love all of them— Turns out, I've got all of them In my college I taught them all to be someone Becoming of acknowledgement With nombres most common Juan, in subcultures, but Beyond that (Or above them) It's John, Or just Jonathan, Watch the ones who drop the consanant; They're always so troublesome, But I took them all up As understudies, Social Studies and some theatrics, Joan of Ark said Two more moments (Two more weeks in) I could have a body worthy Of a Grammy award, but — Would I be a writer then? Probably not, hon— Writers are Off a bit. If you were pretty, ever at all— would you have written this?! If I were pretty at all would there be reason to be this Conflicted? Some of those old New York hallways Haven't been painted In ages Since they made them Don't make that face at me I only dropped my key once On the fourth floor —they're horrible, you know To us, The “brothers” know no love They are destruction, speaking Of this, I got a cold heart. Cold like the robber Cold like the calling I've done in my corner office cold, like the jello mold forming a thought process Worthy enough I might love it like a husband We're re-evaluating your circumstances. Whatever the fuck that's supposed to mean. I've got friends at USPS What the fuck could that even account to. Look, I'm gonna have to give this some serious considerations. It's not that serious. It's not that serious. Of course it is! I'm up to my knees in investments! So?! I wade a waiste deep, Surely you can get by “Up to your knees” What exactly do you need? Money. And lots of it. I mean, from me. Money. Really? Leave me alone. I told you not to write this. You're a voice in my head; No, I'm the hand in your mailbox. What in the fuck do you believe in. I believe in everything! They said you were a genius; I didn't expect you to be —at the very least, lucid— *squints* learn some new vocabulary, okay? For what? Dinner. Maybe. We're still in the process of voting. She's crazy. We'd be crazy not to actually hire her. Her accounts are all practically open; We could just take it. Yeah, and when she kills herself, and there's no blood on our hands— There's nothing that can be done about the amount of this stuff that's already printed! Printed?! What?! You mean— She's published? Self-published. My, what a beautiful happenstance To have already had you And awakened atop mattresses Marked for my assassins hand— Polite, I lost you All of us, Atop the rock We stood and suffered Months beyond a montage, Undercover Love was lost, And all's uncertain The interception of God, At the cost of What terror and cutbacks Have caused us all What you lost was $50, a Hallmark Card, an Academy award, a long lost star's phone number, And all that you wanted, The cock of the gun Was the sound that you wondered What was called , then ran off into wonder. How am I gonna make money And become an award winning songwriter Music producer And multidisciplinary artist, Without all the funding it takes to get noviced Without taking clothes off Wake up 10 years younger I'm suffering My stomach was a rubber band My stomach was a rubber band My only song was Water I forgot to stop For the applause I drowned in all the love; right then and there I died of Lovenessness [The Festival Project] The sound and laughter of children play A baby in a basket The basket case at Trader Joe's Who know what happens It just doesn't pull my heartstrings any longer That my son belongs without his mother So I'd better have another This is us, come on. Don't do this to me. Don't do this, Timmy, you'll be sorry. Come on! We're not even in that movie! We are, though; it's still Listen, you've got the right guy for this. Are you sure. Yeah, I promise. Officers, Stop for a *movement [hot cops flash dance number] Fuck, well, that was all wrong. But worth it! What I meant was— God, this show gets good at 31, But I'm only 22, So I guess I'll know how wrong the war was Once we've lost it, Cause imm a man now The episode is over, Soon comes the next episode With snoop dogg, Or not That was our wedding album. Scatterbrained, and pregnant— There she was just putting all the things together That she needed to be Needed To be needed. There she was, All on 4/20 Trying not to do the wrong thing, But what was it? To be loved. Then, There she was at 21 just going off again At some event— A friend, and her Back then could not imagine They'd become him To be someone. Not as one, But of entirely another World apart, aside from Cyclones into snow cones Turns the watchers into artists All their own, And off my own accord Or own account Or done with boredom Dove soap Open doors And clocks that turn the other hand away, Each day you love Manhattan But can't have that. That's it— This is just Season 1 of Mad Men WHERE THE FUCK IS— [she throws her hands above her head in surrender] I don't KNOW! Oh, you're a girl now?! I guess! What's with those pants, then? To hide the assets! What assets?! You look tragic. I'm going for ‘skeleton' to match all your wives and everybody else on the red carpet Who said you get the red carpet? Manhattan. That guy lies! Well how about this: The walk of stars were carved out in blocks of marble All in my honor. 1000/1 You're our God, now. What! I don't want to be God! SUCK IT UP. YOU WON. I don't wanna! Yaaaaaaayyy. You got the award! All the awards! Speech! Speech! SUNNI BLŪ Uh—- I'm drunk, And there's nothing on the teleprompter [a man in the audience coughs] A-HEM. [Sunni Blū immidiateky shoots the coughing man] [multi-camera shots of celebrity audience reactions; laughing, clapping in hilarity as if someone hasn't just died] TAYLOR SWIFT (unmoved at all) SUNNÏ BLŪ I don't know why you're laughing. That was awful. That guy died [audience is insane, super fake as usual] [more cut takes] SUNNÏ BLŪ It should have been you, Taylor. TAYLOR SWIFT (Still unaffected) SUNNI BLU Anyway. I'd like to thank the academy… Cause I am the academy [Audience is celebrities being celebrities] SUNNI BLU You guys are all idiots: I'm a go f*ck myself— And anyone else who wants to show up At my afterparty. Whatever. Peace. [cheesy academy award music plays—Sunnï knocks over the mic, peaces out obnoxiously; the audience cheers wildly and the host returns to the stage.] Who's the host? Whatever. Hey, better than nothin. You're telling me. yeah. I know: Oh, she's a comic? Yeah. I got it. BOB SAGET Ooh, that's good. Ū No—no my God. No Bob Saget, stop it! Wait, Bob Saget is dead right? Last I recall: Fuck—FUCK! Dammit. Dammit, dammit. Okay, Rue— you're up. Rue, what in the— Shhhh, don't let them know I'm in here! Oh, wait— It's me, Blanche. That's hot. I'm a debutant. My god, you're so young. Here, take this, What's that, You'll need that. V.O. I'm being hunted by the ghost of Bob Saget. *haunted. No, hunted! There she is! Grab her! Ooh, Bob Saget. Why, yes. How old are you? Not dead yet! You don't have to kidnap me, I'll happily go with you, sir. Really? Yes. GET IN THE— NOH, GET IN THE VAN. INT. IN THE VAN. [a bunch of hot male celebrities are in the van] Oh. Okay. Wow. That was easy. What is it, Friday. It's Friday and a half. Friday.5 What. There's a Friday movie between 1 and 2 So I guess this is season 8.5 I guess this is season 8.5 HEY, GET BACK HERE. What is this. It's your lunch. I don't want this. Well, okay. What— is this strange music— They call it dubstep Come on, Jimmy, you're slipping Kimmel, cause Fallon is dead or presumed missing Probably Skrillex Probably a bounty on his head, Dog willing The Festival Priojects Inclement Infinite Is coming up next, on Legends Come on Jim, KEEP UP. Nobody can know about this, okay? Wait, where's Kimmel Okay, I got O'Brien— Black Irish Bastard… Alright, Alec Baldwin is a little tied up, right now, but LEMON, Fuck. That's l—future me. What?! I gotta go, okay?! What? Go where. Let's get DRUNK. No, That's—I got a show tonight What?! Look at my lexicon. Your—what, Meet me on Lexington. Oh, this pussy is finished! I got it, I got it! He's LENNONNNNN!! JOHN LENNON Fuck. Look, I gotta go. John Lennon?! You're dead! Funny, I thought not. Watch this. MOOOOOOOOOOOM. Fuck, What, It's my kid. I gotta go. Wait, you have kids?! Well, I just had you, didn't I? “The mayor” is a secret underground rap star lol #trappin Okay, What's else happened Idk hold on Okay, So whats the sauce on this sandwich. Oh. Jeez, this again. That *sandwhich? Hah. There's no sauce on that sandwhich. —there's not!? No: You see. It's very simple. WAKE UP, YOU'RE A ROCKSTAR. we gotta take the train. The train?! NO. NOTTHETRAIN. NO. Man, fuck the train! [SUNNI BLŪ wakes up on the train.] What's this, the train? [is the train] (Angrily, tossing newspaper) Man, FUCK the train! Other hobo: Aww, thanks, I need that for my— [s/he snatches back the paper]. Wait! I need that back—what day is it? [drunkenly illegible gibberish turns into perfect Hebrew] GODDAMMIT, it's Shabbat; I gotta get to Temple. [s/he shoves the newspaper back into the hobo's lap] Here. Oh no, I thought I couldn't forget RABI FUCK _]€_# WHAT WAS IT GODDAMIT IT WAS SO CLEVER. God So it was… What did you do with it? Do with what My idea what idea My—my rabbi joke— What rabbi joke you know what rabbi joke! You were the one who gave it to me. Oh, did I? YES, SATAN, JESUS. GOD Ohh, Satan-Jesus. I like that one. NO— it was— It was much better than that, it was— It was funny. Oh, it was? YES. —did you write it down? Fuck, I realize I just opened a A FUCK PORTAL. OHH, GET IN IT, GET INSIDE. I had an Artemis in my pocket But I lost him Walked away from the cornermarker And the cornerstone, for the sunset I wonder if songs always come When I'm walking, Or God makes us promises, For world of I'm not JB, I'm KG, Can you see me now? If you could see what I see, We'd be even wtf did I just write this And not realize I just wrote this Yeah. That shit happens to me all the time. WHAT. ALL THE TKMEx Shut up, THE ANDRE3K CHARADES GAME is getting intense. What in the FUCK is that. *flutes* Ohh. And KITES. yyyyyYYYYYYYAAAAAHHH—— GODDAMMIT. I can't see really, I just dream I'm not thinking, I'm dancing This is what you asked for Exactly what you asked for For once, I'm finally glad I have your eyes on My friend I can see you all on the horizon, Singing NO, NO MORE MUSICALS!! Jimmy, what did you do?! I don't know what I did! You lyin bastard. I'm not lying! So, where ya from? —I don't know where I'm from. Listen, I'm gonna need you SHUT UP, JUST SHUT UP. It seems like these scenes are getting shorter. I'm bored with this. Ok. Let's do something else. I fuckin hate you. I hate you. I fuckin hate you. 88. Oh no: 8 Wait, what the— *dolphin* WOAH, okay: Oh, no. No, No, no OHNONO. I told you I'd find him. Anyway. Seems like there's something more important I should be doing. Are you sure this is the right place. Right place. Right time. Fuck— FUCK. What, what happened. I lost my— SKRILLEX! No. SKRILLEX. NO, NO— SKR— I swear to God, Google knows everything. Google don't know shit about SHIT. I gotta lose m 39 lbs. For what. MADONNA DO IT FOR THE BANANAS. I hate— you. COME ON, MISTER. Fuck off, Madonna, I'M A GOD. I miss Beyoncé. That's not relevant. Beyoncé is relevant to everything. *smacks* QUIT FANGIRLING. Trust me, I hate you. I don't trust you, but I believe you. I got it. I hate this place. Holy shit. What. I developed a new phobia. What's that mean?! I don't know, I can probably use it in a fight or something. For what. SPECIAL ABILITY UNLOCKED. I see you looking over my shoulder I see the shadows, I try not to jump at em. I spent six months in a coffin, you know I spent my life a sarcophagus (Wow, I got it right.) Try not to mutter those haunts in a hospital Try to recover from trauma Uncovered post traumatics, Anxiety attacks and a lot of those— What do you call them? A flashback. Here goes one: SONNY MOORE aka SKRILLEX appears. I told you not to— But I did! I didn't mean to! But you did! This is ludachris! Oh look, it's— Fuck. God dammit. Come on! What's his name!? What's his name?! I'll think abo it it. Are you serious? Another shapeshifter? Yes, I guess welll just have to kill them all, then. I just want to go home. You don't have one. …oh. So here we have. Okay, wait a second. I wasn't faking my symptoms at all, actually. My heart had dropped, and been pounding and fluttering insessantly— It had been a hard week, but especially the last three days; The coughing—. Everyone seemed to be wearing clothing with stars or bears on it, Champion sportswear. I fucking hate champion sportswear. But the palpitations were real as ever— and now— On a Saturday night in the Jamaica, Queens medical center emergency room, There they were again. Only this time I knew exactly why. ‘Too Bizzare' by Skrillex begins to play, via Complications 003- The Trauma Method. Irony. It was ironic, but still startling, Started with some nostalgic traumas, Every other time I saw an ER doctor (Why I don't go) Fuck, I just realized I have to airdrop myself 880 times. That fucking sucks. Did you say you were a doctor? I was, once. When is “once” At some point. Listen, I'm gonna need you to backtrack to get to the bottom of this. I'm innocent, I promise! We caught you at 27 different angles doing this. Oh. [beat] I plead the 5th. Ohh. Cerulean. My favorite. c R A Y On Oh, I get it, I L L U M I N A T U S. Nice, it worked. I know everything about you. So you do. [beat] You're a God. What the fuck do you want from me. Listen. I. Am not. A God, Right. That's exactly what a God would say. No they wouldn't! Because a God wouldn't say anything! AHA. Don't ‘AHA' ME. I don't mind, at all It don't matter— to me I don't mind, at all It don't matter—to me Might as well not think about it The space between us Might as well just stay awake then No sense in leaving Just to come back It don't matter to me, now Now and again I go crazy just making arrangements, But besides that, If you like it, you should have it It's a long road, As Kaskade says, And a short dance, With the right one And time goes by I would call it mild, But actually I'm in a wild panic It might be a heart attack I just might even Die right here But I don't mind, at all It don't matter—to me I don't mind—at all It don't matter to me, I said I don't mind, at all, now It really don't matter to me I said, I don't mind, at all It really don't matter to anyone Now does it (Not it doesn') I don't mind, at all It don't matter— to me I don't mind, at all It don't matter—to me Might as well not think about it The space between us Might as well just stay awake then No sense in leaving Just to come back Palpitations and precipitations at the pulpit Preacher, please don't make me a culprit I been prayin— I been paying my tithes, 10% Even, Now 25, Almost half of me is not mine! Why try? I've been walking out, in straight lines I been crying silently It ain't right I been making most of my nights Sometimes I see sun come up twice Up, down up 10 degrees, It ain't right Up down up 33, it ain't right Up, down, up I've been spending my time Down, up, down Riding round, Trying not to down in my mind Up, down up What is this. It's my project. What is it? The Festival Project. Yeah but—what— What. Is it? …it's my project. *painfully infuriated* Okay, enter here. EXAM ROOM 10 Why exam room 10? Because. Where are the other nine? Just—get in. I'm not going in there! JUST GET IN. UGH. DEADMAU5 (head and all) stands at a tall podium in the center of the room) What is this, This is deadmau5. I know that. —-!!! —?!? What. !!! What? This is the exam? Yes! NO. What is “no”. I'm not playing for deadmau5. That's the exam. Then I fail! Automatic Fail? yes. Automatic fail. Then you win. What. *slams gavel* Congratulations—you're the next superstar DJ. WhY. . What. Woohoo! I just retired! DEADMAU5 exits. … … After a few moments of comic tension, the Deadmau5 head rolls back in through the exit which he has taken. Ugh. Fuck this. No matter what you do, you're a superstar DJ. What. No! Yes. The answer is yes. NO. Fuck. What the FUCK. No matter what you do. You want to go, Go, you want to die, Die, you want to try, try You want to cry, cry Do what you want; As so will I, Demand is demand— Supply is supply. EDX So then, I followed this long hallway under the stage deck. Uh huh. And it led to a door— Uhhuh, where'd the door lead? To a portal. Woah. Pasqualle! You made it! I—yes. Congratulations! *blows party horn* *Daisies/ confetti* You're like 25! I'll be 25 forever. Nice! Yeah. I guess that's why it's called ‘music'—a musician without muses is just useless. ‘Well, whose next?' I wondered. All of my muses were not just so wonderful to me, but adored by many—and perhaps this is what allured me most—befuddled ans confounded me; once my mind was set on something, there was nothing else its eye could see—and for how long one God could only know, how deep the love would go and that the blood would run deep, and the scars to show for it, only upon my heart and never by soul—for a love was a love, and even once came and gone, to the end of my life I knew I would still ponder upon them, at one time or another, my muses—star studded lovers, rather than crossed, shiny and golden like all diamond and trophies so treasured and thought of as precious. ‘Yes, you are—precious.' Another tongue in cheek thought, for the other that I was, and also was not, as summer drew onward as short as it would come and go—a reminder to leave the apartment more often, and to mind my manners, to find the upper echelon wherever it was and come quietly into its doors, to open my world and wordform of thought, into a place where my heart always was; then, and only then, would I be home. Amongst the men and women of the uppercut and classy, luxurious big fishing ponds and flocks of doves upon olive branches—the peaceful world long parted from where mine was, by only the fault of my own. What had been done just certainly was, and yet, what was to come was an open poem, not of mine, but Godform in thought. ‘I wonder what's at the top of Rockefeller Plaza.' —perhaps, a gander at the bottom of an even larger entertainment complex. Then, again, only God would know what was beyond all that I wanted; a job—and not just any job at all— the one that I had always wanted. Mmm. Birthday cake. Suddenly the taste of a white confetti crème filled my mouth with a delicious remnince of what it might be like to taste a confectionary sugar again—but i couldn't imagine ever making it just on talent and charisma alone—no. Indeed, it seemed something had damaged my charm, and perhaps it was just the swarms and droves of phone controlled masses that saw me as nothing more than dust, I had started to surrender my desire to perform, and the quality of my music—along with my ability to make it, suffered with the awful thing that had been crowding my soul at all—whatever it was, evil and dark in nature, sure saw to it that it wanted to hurt me in all the ways that it could—and in all the ways it could not, I stayed away from most others, favoring my delusions of love. ‘Nobody seems to understand that the pain they cause will only harm themselves.', I thought Younger souls, however, they were—and they would be kept in the pain that I was in one way or another until eventual death, far behind me on the infinite road to the source. Far enough behind, that it seeked to destroy my progress, and for all that it could, it also couldn't. The infliction of pain would simply not act as a measure for control any longer. Off into my own world, where I was at least free from the thoughts and judgement of others. She's the most beautiful girl, And I'm the most beautiful boy; So naturally, we belong together, don't we? I see a pretty picture, Picket fences and a family Golden Retrievers Someone relieve her; She doesn't believe me TV dreams and exquisite pretty people Burning candles, fire flames and frequent figures, Guest characters and cameos, Repeat offenders, multiple appearances Suddenly, really, it's another need People, people pleasers Audience affection, Tragic endings, Butterflies and new beginnings Gun under my tongue, Rubber like a frog My mind is in a fog Haven't bothered going on a walk To Trader Joe's but The anthem of my youth, A lost soul Another form of my love So what I wonder Put the gun up under my chin Rubber like a frog Blow my head off Just cause I didn't blow up Selfish cunt Big brother, Another hypnotist Little brother, Gotta love him Gotta love em For the Love of God I could stop for a moment Wash my mind out with soap Like I'm ten years younger, even Seriously 20 years between us, You can't even hide underwater In a bathtub Seriously, Someone help us For the love of God, for the love of Hollywood Seriously, Someone love us, For the love of God, For the love of Rockefeller Plaza Someone help us Another possible walk of stars A little shop of horrors Another whole story I get rid of my demons The hoes screamin I put semen in her Permanent like semen, Just keep dreamin I'mma just keep preaching SaMo, Brooklyn Europe Next I keep scheming Whoever you are; If you're a wreck— You need a check No respect, neglect Just cover your neck (I'm blind to my own design, sometimes) That's what the eye is Try this: Close your eyes and say thrice, kids I am the God of the eye, Osiris I am the God of the Eye, I'm Osiris I am the God, I walk amongst the highest Thoth, You lost Better just die and keep trying I am the God of the eye, I am (Try this) I am the God of the eye (I never die) I am the God of the eye (That's right, three times) I am the God of the eye No black and white television, In my dimension we pay attention to centrifugal, The mission isn't in materialism, Whatever youre spending If money the God, l of your eye, Realize, I am higher My gunfire, Is right on the back of The one dollar I am the God of the eye I Am Your money is nothin to us We come in peace, To end suffering Pretty little nigga Look just like Kendrick Kickin it with jigga I'm the new higs boson Part of me never left Boston (Fuck Starr!) Part of me never left homeless This ain't my home It's my office You never heard this song You don't notice I'm an ugly kid, you don't notice me Rooftop smells like soy sauce On god I am ugly You don't notice -Atari the God Can we get back to this, please? Damn. She really whooped her ass, though. Janet, can I borrow you for a second? No. Please. [Whoopi Goldberg appears in the doorway, gesturing “c'mon”] …alright. I got convictions on my lips, I took a picture Turn the page The worst of all was, it really did seem like they were racists— INSOMNIAC EVENTS Not just racists— the most deadly kind of racists. WHITE SUPREMACISTS You really want it this way, don't you? No! I LOVE you! Oh, do you? If there's a mile in here, I swear to god.. Are you high enough yet? I thought so HIGHER! hire star* What. Just do it. You remember these guys, right? GOOD CANNABIS, FAIRBANKS, ALASKA No. Why are we back here. Alright, we might have fucked up. Why. This guy sucks. HEY. What. COME BACK TO ALASKA never that. WHAT, WHY NOT! GOD HATES FAGS!!! Well, you're wrong! WHITE POWER. Nah. ALL LIVES MATTER O rly? Even this guy? Literally every “NO” …so, “all lives.” Look, I don't care what color it is; I want that book in my library. GO TO THE LIVRARY. NO. GET IN HERE. NO AUBREY. STAY DEAD. She's dead, right? YOU CALLED ME HERE. I didn't! You Did. I did not, all i said was *swoons* …I love her. (I really do) WHAT?! “I Love you?!” It was more the *swoon* that did it. Disconnect. Fuck, I lost deadmau5 again What'd you do to him? Nothing! Put him back! He's still there! He's right there, you see him? No! This isn't deadmau5. We want deadmau5. bring him BACK. Fuck, I fucked up. What'd you do? …nothing? Pick up the phone Pick up the phone …hello? Who IS this? Fuck it, I quit. Man, God never puts my dishes back in the right place, like ever. I told you, I don't live here, I'm just… Babysitting. CC! What! CC! What? CC WHAT. Fuck, man. That was wild. Where the fuck have you been? I don't know. You don't know—you smell funny. “Funny” is that what that smell is? No. When were you? When? Ha. Did you—- Did I what? —did you go to a party without me? Lmfao fuck these niggaz. Why, what happened. What's this. Where was it?! Idlewild. “IdLeWiLd”?!?!? You. Old. One here and die, you know, l. It's cattle call for curtain calls guy Where did this go— What was this, once? It's the return Welcome to Oz This is the Tower of Babel Remember; I wrote that Better than the bottom, Still not the top —it's not as fast, when it's not going all the way up Did you jump yet Come around more Keep coughing Are you sure this is where it was or—? Somewhere else I stayed Back when I was homeless It's hopeless! We lost her Antenna, antenna SUPERMARKET I loved her —she was undercover —I'm still in your stirrups I'm lost in New York, then BACKFIRE Adele remix is on [have a seat] Can I go now? I still need a hat, a half dollar and an alter cloth You could win an award for this; I don't want an award, I just want my son back Motherhood, motherhood Brotherhood, brotherhood This isn't one of us! No one was No one was Can I go now? Where to? Home! Nope, that's just the office, I'm still homeless, unless I They got cabanas on top of offices! (The rich and the famous) Networking and brunches— _this looks fun, doesn't it? I altered the course of history In brief exchanges and Various social atrocities This is hypocrisy! lol rly This is hypocrisy!! Hyper awareness and, psychic inclinations… You realize the more low quality people you let in The more low quality this country becomes, don't you? I put a roll in the back of the chosen ones. Used to be cast more, Now something seldom ever happens Such as this— A fun Fortune 500 What does that even mean Forbes. Look it up. What if the policy is Foreign; Look it up. I know enough about the girl next door to know Something is horrible, Something inside of her Rots at the core, Her obsession; My undeservedness of such, What she must, I mustn't, just Unjustice Broski, okay I got to discard All the pichardo Besides just this one (I'm standing on top of you) Put somebody worthy on the fourth floor Worse off, I was done for Before I got to New York What's her for?! I know enough about the man upstairs to know All these glares and “How dare you's” and Hatred says Why would you wait 30 years Until today, I guess Something is certainly off about her. I said yes. It was more probably something like “SUCK MY DICK” What. “YOU HEARD ME” Oh yes, I did. From 1990 to 1993 From 1990 To 1993 From 1990 To 1993 Stop breeding these things, “Love is familiarity” No Love is what you make it But you can't Because of slavery They don't make music —they don't make love either Well, look where your lust took you! Nowhere! Exactly! Look where your love took you: Vegas, Los Angeles, South of the Border Above it a New Yorker— Under budget, Celibate and My arms are too short to jump the turnstyle, Meanwhile My ex husband left permanent scars on My face My lips My arms My hands And my heart. Did you bite him? Of course I bit him, he was strangling me. You definitely won this fight. I know. Look, if I don't call for security, This bitch is gonna make me kill her. OCTOPUSSY NO. What. NO. Stankass. I will KILL this bitch. Look, I gotta get ahead in this. I need a WIN. These are customs. Trash. Wash your pussy. Send her back. Nah, you know what. Remove that hex. Wait, what, really?! Yeah, like; Reverse it. Woah. That's crazy. They got like….white slaves now. That's not right. What do you mean. That's not it. You said “reverse it” This is what the white supremacy just did to everyone else: [world in crisis except for for people who look like Kayla Lauren, to whom EVERYTHING is a fucking crisis, that isn't] BECKY/KAREN/WICKED WITCH OF WHITE AMERICA I AM OFFENDED I'm offended that you signed your like 12 year old daughter up to pose nearly nude, but— Hey look, it's us now; is this freedom?! Uh…. Why are all the female models like 12 and all the male models are fully grown men— Or women. Right. Idk. Wait, I do. You do?! Wait. Something tells me all the pedophiles and all the white supremacists are in the same group… Run the same businesses— Have the same families. This is disgusting Okay, this is gross That's not right ! That's not my job! Oh, it's not!!? NO. Who should I call That guy. So you want this? Oh, it's a death curse?! It will NEVER end. Wanna bet. I'll kill you and take the whole world with me. Now that's a threat. Thing is, I'm actually making it. I'm telling on you! Ok. Wait 30 years though so you look and sound REALLY fucking stupid. Ok. 30 YEARS. Doesn't make sense. What's the statute of limitations for— Hm. Depends. Depends on what. Who are you?! WHO ARE YOU?! NOBODY YOU SHOULD KNOW ABOUT. THEN WHY DO I? wtf is this? This is Texas being petty. Ok, fuck ya‘lol YAW. I'm serious, wtf is wrong with you. Something. What. Fix me. Fix you. Hm. Ok. *COUGHING* Somethings wrong here. Yep, it's definitely some kind of FIX IT. Where's this ROCK? At the ROCK. Like, where tho?! Ur gonna need this. What. They r crucifying u. Noted. Hunts Point Food Distribution Center Lmfao I need this word hold on “eliminating redundancies, setting strict timelines, and allowing cases to proceed contemporaneously” [ Finally, recognizing the danger that social media poses to young people and mental health, New York City Department of Health and Mental Hygiene Commissioner Dr. Ashwin Vasan today issued a Health Commissioner's Advisory identifying unfettered access to and use of social media as a public health hazard, just as past U.S. surgeons general have done with tobacco and firearms.] A win. I don't play dead. What do you call this: DIE! DIE, BITCH! Corrections. I still don't understand how this— ACID HAPPENS. Out of sight Out of mind So why these guys Tryna waste my time Tryna fuck with my mind with All these lights OH MY GOD I ain't got time for that Well, Maybe I do— I just Don't like NIGGAZ LIKE YOU. (Say what) I don't like Niggaz like U! I'm Sunnï Blū! You're stupid Oh, so he put a curse on sunni blu, too? Ok. Cool. When all my aliases come up This dumb motherfucking drunk Is gonna get stuck In his own woods He'll bury himself In the words that he left With the scars In the words that he left With the scars Sunni blu Is the sayer of stars I slaughtered them all Swallowed them whole Like a big black hole I'm a big black god I'm a big black God Fuck Twinkle that broad One punch girl One punch girl 5 punch faggot I'll unwrap flags on your Goddamn Fuck that Put a curse on my alter ego Lucky he's a he, tho I blow holes in em I blow smoke And love sausage I'm a hedon And he not a Hero He broke He lost I'm open Shirts vs skins I got 666 Curses to show you What your words did IM RA I'm a big black God You're at home with the young apostle Let's be honest He never even liked his father So turned him to a mother, Told his mother to ‘run far, And bring back The life that I want' I'm a big black God In light skinned clothing You don't know to explode Or explode on me Cause my mommy's a Dark skinned icon That my God Find something to pass the time, God Sunni with I, huh I won Fuck a pedophile wifebeater Bury him in the woods with his fury Fear me, now I'm coming up with reverse curses And cures Cause my words Bought the whole world Buried you in the woods I'll bury you in the woods, Bitch Very good I'm a big black God -Blū. GOD is the GOAT I just became god I do what I want I get what I want when I want it I don't want no problems Me myself and God only I buy everything I used to steal These tears in my heart say I'm healing What's the difference, anyway? I've never been fit for your interests, or industry Add insult to injury Add everything to my Amazon cart, then My sympathies Nothing is greater in heaven As it is in hell, for this industry Turned on its head And turned over from 7 to ten Check your messages, then Shut up kid, this doesn't involve you You're not included in the package Michael c hall and John c Riley reprise Mr. Cellophane in the style of DEXTER MORGAN. HA. Classic. GOT EM. V.O. I met her at The Jumping Point {Coming Up…} INT. THE JUMPING POINT POP-UP NIGHTCLUB LOUNGE & BAR. NIGHT “A Long Day's Night” / “A Hard Day's Night” C {CONFUSION SPELL, SUCCESSFUL} [Sequence Initiated.] {Enter The Multiverse} [The Festival Project.™] COPYRIGHT © THE FESTIVAL PROJECT 2019-2024 | THE COMPLEX COLLECTIVE. © ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. © -Ū. {

The Mission inches closer to its 400th episode with a stacked review filled with HBO Max's Scavenger's Reign, Bill Cosby's The Cosby Mysteries vs Ted Knight's Too Close For Comfort, a kayak, a leather bag, lipstick, a book, and a movie called Booty Call. Rate & Review The Mission on Apple Email  micheauxmission@gmail.com Follow The Mission on Instagram Subscribe to the Mission on YouTube  Get your Micheaux Mission SWAG from TeePublic We are a proud member of The Podglomerate - we make podcasts work! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

(Continuing the march towards the wedding, here is a re-upload of an episode of FCTC's coverage of Final Night! Enjoy!) Welcome to the two hundredth and sixty-fifth episode of From Crisis to Crisis: A Superman Podcast!  This podcast has a simple premise; examine just about every Superman comic published between Man of Steel #1 in 1986 to Adventures of Superman #649 in 2006 in an informative and hopefully entertaining format. Final Night continues! This time out Mike and Jeff continue their coverage of Final Night by looking at the main books and crossovers that came out during Week Three! First up is Action Comics #727, which sees Superman doing a bit of a retro thing by jumping instead of flying. He's not doing it to be cool or old school, though. Nope. His powers continue to fade away as the sun continues to be consumed by the Sun Eater. Bad guys use the chaos to steal several Special Crimes Unit battle suits, which Superman has to deal with as an unnamed man has to make his way through a snow covered Metropolis and learns about the good and bad of humanity. Mike also gives a quick history lesson in the middle of the notes where he probably gets something wrong. Then, in Final Night #3, things go from bad to apocalyptic. Ted Knight, the Golden Age Starman, does some figuring and realizes that the diameter of the sun is off. It turns out that Sun Eater's feeding cycle involves causing the star it is eating to go nova, which is great for the Sun Eater, because it propels it to the next star, but is kind of bad for all life in the system the sun provides light for. Finally, the boys look at the other crossover issues which include Final Night Parallax Emerald Night #1, Superboy #33, Aquaman #26, and Detective Comics #703! Shows Promoted in This Episode Podcast Full of Kryptonite – Hosted by James, Jason and John The Superman Super Show – Hosted by Steven and Ed The From Crisis to Crisis theme is by Lucian Desar. “Final Count” Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/

Matt and Mike Read Comics is back with episode 13, part 2 of our Starman series, by James Robinson and Tony Harris. If you're wondering why we need two parts, and even three, to discuss this series; just look at the size of the compendiums! There are well over 2,000 pages of comics gold here. They're like really awesome textbooks. Following up on the back half of the first compendium, we see Ted Knight really start to come into his own as a reluctant hero. We learn SO much more about the history of the Shade and his generations-long blood feud with the Ludlows. Here is where the brilliant cast of supporting characters in Starman really start to shine. David, the Shade, the Mist, the O'Dare family, and one of my personal favorites, Bobo Bennetti. Part 3 coming soon. James Robinson and Tony Harris' run on Starman is a must read for all comic book fans.

Jack has arrived in the world of the Demon, after jumping into the cursed poster.  Jack, Matt O'Dare and The Shade are given a choice and are visited by people who have had huge influences on their lives.  What are they willing to do free the all the other people trapped in this hellscape. Also Ross talks All-Star Comics 11 and Ted Knight's part in it.   #Starman #Comicbook #TheShade #OpalCity #DoctorFate #WonderWoman #Hawkman #TheAtom #Spectre #DoctorMidNite #Sandman #JohnnyThunder #Thunderbolt #JSA 

Step into the uproarious world of 1980's comedy classics like Blues Brothers, Airplane, and the iconic Caddyshack. Explore the behind-the-scenes antics, fueled by the era's cocaine-fueled creativity, as we unravel the mystery of Caddyshack's unlikely success. Delve into the added post-production gopher magic and the tumultuous dynamics between stars like Rodney Dangerfield and Ted Knight & Chevy Chase and Bill Murray. Plus, we settle the debate between rollerskating and rollerblading, dissecting their societal impact and the quest for the smoothest ride. Tune in for a wild ride through a comedy classic and wheeled wonders! Send us a voicemail here: https://www.speakpipe.com/The70sVsThe80s

Matt and Mike are back after the holiday break and we are still reading comics! On episode 12 we start our multi-part breakdown of the legendary 90's run of Starman, by James Robinson and Tony Harris. Collecting almost 100 issues and reinventing the character for a new generation, Robinson crafts the story of a reluctant hero who has superheroing in his blood. Jack Knight's father, Ted Knight, was the first Starman decades ago, a member of the Justice Society with such legends as Jat Garrick, the first Flash, and Alan Scott, the first Green Lantern. Listen to us unpack the story of Jack Knight and his cast of supporting characters, such as the amoral Shade, the villainous Mist, and the crazy O'Dare family of cops.

Pearl Harbor Remembrance day. Entertainment from 2003. Deleware became the 1st state, Jet stream discovered, 1st instant replay used, 1st execution by lethal injection. Todays birthdays - Clarence Nash, Ted Knight, Ellen Burstyn, Harry Chapin, Gary Mooris, C, Thomas Howell, Sara Bareilles. Chuck Yeager died.Intro - Pour some sugar on me - Def Leppard http://defleppard.com/Stand up - Lucacris feat. ShawnaI love this bar - Taby KeithBirthday - The BeatlesBirthdays - In da club - 50 Cent http://50cent.com/Donald Duck theme songI'm alright - Kenny LogginsCats in the cradle - Harry ChapinBaby bye bye - Gary MorrisLove song - Sara BareillesExit - It's not love - Dokken http://dokken.net/ https://coolcasts.cooolmedia.com/

Ross and David from The Earth-2 Podast dive into a story from Sandman's Mystery Theatre, The Mist. This story cover the origin of The Mist and the first meeting of Wesley Dodds and Ted Knight, The Sandman and Starman.  Ross is very grateful David suggest this. Just in time for the Jack Knight and Wesley Dodds team-up.   Check out The Earth-2 Podcast  --  https://theearth2podcast.podbean.com/ #DCComics #Starman #Sandman #JSA #JusticeSocietyofAmerica #comicbooks #podcast

He's Chevy Chase. . .and you're not! From early work with the National Lampoon Radio Hour to his time as the first anchor of SNL's Weekend Update, to a varied (and variable) movie career, Chevy Chase has blended snark and slapstick to the delight of fans. Films such as Fletch, National Lampoon's Vacation, and Caddyshack were box office hits while other projects such as a Fox late night show were bombs. And there were many stories of Chevy and his coworkers scrapping (sometimes literally) along the way. So fans were surprised when Chevy reemerged as Pierce Hawthorne in the NBC sitcom Community. That didn't end well either, but it was a welcome callback to the time when we all stayed up late waiting for the words "Live from New York, It's Saturday Night!" As always find extra clips below and thanks for sharing our shows! Want more Chevy? Chevy's tenure at Saturday Night Live was stormy, but maybe that was inevitable as he became the breakout star of the first season with his pratfall filled opens and his Weekend Update anchor gig. Here's Chevy with one of his most notorious impressions -- that of perpetually clumsy President Gerald Ford. https://youtu.be/_bvxZgCryUE?si=nYQ8kyW-I4log8Nh Chevy's first two films were rom-coms which confused his fans who were expecting sharper edged comedy. That came in 1980 courtesy of Caddyshack, a Lampoon production that included great work from Bill Murray, Rodney Dangerfield, and Ted Knight. All together now -- Be The Ball! https://youtu.be/I3akC_INsFc?si=iY_iB8Msu6xrNUBk Chevy pretty much fell off the radar in the early 2000s, so it was a surprise at the end of the decade when he was cast as older community college student Pierce Hawthorne in NBC's Community and gained a new generation of fans. https://youtu.be/srIhtTPUJ_g?si=DcgRiITlDt1j7Rzi

It's happening! After close to three years, we're finally talking about maybe our collective favorite movie ever: 1980's Caddyshack! No movie has been more quoted, more watched, and more important to bringing us together with our friends than Caddyshack. In this episode, we talk all about what makes it great in our opinion.One of the reasons Caddyshack is so wonderful is the performance of Bill Murray. While Ted Knight (Judge Smails), Rodney Dangerfield (Al Czervik), and Chevy Chase (Ty Webb) are also at the top of their game, Murray's Carl Spackler stands out as much as anyone else. We cap the episode off by drafting our favorite Bill Murray movies and other credits. Well...we're waiting...for you to listen!If you enjoy the show, please rate and review us on the iTunes/Apple Podcasts app or wherever you listen. Or better yet, tell a friend to listen!Want to support our show and become a PCY Classmate? Click here!Follow us on your preferred social media:TwitterFacebookInstagramSupport the show

It's happening! After close to three years, we're finally talking about maybe our collective favorite movie ever: 1980's Caddyshack! No movie has been more quoted, more watched, and more important to bringing us together with our friends than Caddyshack. In this episode, we talk all about what makes it great in our opinion.One of the reasons Caddyshack is so wonderful is the performance of Bill Murray. While Ted Knight (Judge Smails), Rodney Dangerfield (Al Czervik), and Chevy Chase (Ty Webb) are also at the top of their game, Murray's Carl Spackler stands out as much as anyone else. We cap the episode off by drafting our favorite Bill Murray movies and other credits. Well...we're waiting...for you to listen!If you enjoy the show, please rate and review us on the iTunes/Apple Podcasts app or wherever you listen. Or better yet, tell a friend to listen!Want to support our show and become a PCY Classmate? Click here!Follow us on your preferred social media:TwitterFacebookInstagramSupport the show

RMR 0227: Special Guest, Kevin Gootee of the Gutting the Sacred Cow Podcast joins your hosts Chad Robinson and Russell Guest for the Retro Movie Roundtable as they revisit Caddyshack (1980) [PG-13] Genre: Comedy, Sports Starring: Chevy Chase, Rodney Dangerfield, Ted Knight, Michael O'Keefe, Bill Murray, Sarah Holcomb, Scott Colomby, Cindy Morgan, Dan Resin, Henry Wilcoxon, Elaine Aiken, Albert Salmi, Ann Ryerson, Brian Doyle-Murray, Hamilton Mitchell, Peter Berkrot, John F. Barmon Jr., Lois Kibbee, Brian McConnachie, Scott Powell, Ann Crilley, Cordis Heard, Scott Sudden, Jackie Davis, Thomas A. Carlin, Minerva Scelza, Kenneth Burritt, Rebecca Burritt, Barbara Keegan, Scott Jackson, Ron Frank, Patricia Wilcox, Debi Frank, Tony Gulliver   Director: Harold Ramis Recorded on 2023-08-04

"Bubi, Bubi, Who's Got the Ruby?" & "1001 Faces of the Riddler"Aired October 12, 1968 Catwoman and Penguin are at odds over a priceless ruby and the Terrific Trio are caught in the middle in our two-part story review.  Next, Riddler is back in town and he's using disguises to throw the Dynamic Duo off his trail even more so than his riddles.​ ​In addition, John and Dan Greenfield, creator and author of the 13th Dimension discuss whether Ted Knight did the voice of Commissioner Gordon and how cool it would be if Funko's Pop Vinyl line did a series based on the Filmation cartoon. Plus, Dan talks about the relationship between Gordon and Bruce Wayne that started all the way at the beginning of the Batman comic in Detective Comics in 1939. ​Comment on the episode here or write thebatcavepodcast@gmail.com

Do you remember the 1980 Classic Caddyshack? It starred Chevy Chase, Rodney Dangerfield, Bill Murry, & Ted Knight. And if you watched it as a kid, you might remember the true star, Mr. Gopher. So join us as we go back to the beginning of the 80s and see if this is an actual Classic or a Class-Suck.Do You Remember Liking This Movie?

Episode 407."Spaceballs"Actor: Jim J. Bullock.Jim J. Bullock is a legendary actor who has been in a wide array of hit shows and movies. These include Hollywood Squares, Too Close For Comfort, Spaceballs, Seinfeld and so many more. Jim and I get into his work, life and people he's met along the way which include Ted Knight, Joan Rivers, Vincent Price and so many more.Jim is a gifted actor and wonderful human being. I consider myself fortunate to have had the pleasure to interview him.Welcome the awesome, Jim J. Bullock.Monday Morning Critic: Instagram, TiKTok, YouTube and Facebook.www.imdb.com/title/tt12597724/www.mmcpodcast.com

Get ready to dive headfirst into a heated debate about the nominees for the SNL Hall of Fame! Join jD and his esteemed panel - Jon Schneider, Andy Hoglund, and Andrew Clark - as we dissect the 15 new nominees and discuss who should make the cut. With a stacked lineup of talent to choose from, this episode is guaranteed to be a rollercoaster ride of opinions and insights.We kick things off by discussing the legendary John Belushi and Bill Murray, delving into their legacies and why they should undoubtedly be inducted into the Hall of Fame. We also tackle the question of whether the Lonely Island crew deserves a spot on the ballot, and explore the impact of other SNL greats like Buck Henry, Dana Carvey, and Christopher Walken. Strap in for a whirlwind of passionate opinions and spirited debates about the show's most iconic contributors.As we wrap up our discussion, we shift the focus to other nominees like Dana Carvey, Rosie Schuster, Jeff Richards, and Don Pardo, debating their merits and contributions to the show. We even consider the role of music in SNL's identity and touch on the possibility of an annual honorary award. Don't miss this exciting episode as we weigh in on who should be immortalized in the SNL Hall of Fame!Transcript0:00:08 - Speaker 1It's the SNL Hall of Fame podcast with your host, jamie Dube, chief librarian Thomas Senna, and featuring Matt Bardille And now curator of the hall, jamie Dube. 0:00:42 - Speaker 2Hey and welcome to the SNL Hall of Fame round table. It's JD here and I'm glad to be joining you once again on the SNL Hall of Fame, a podcast which is a weekly affair. Each episode, we take a deep dive into the career of a former cast member, host, musical guest or writer and add them to the ballot for your consideration. Once the nominees have been announced, we turn to you, the listener, to vote for the most deserving and help determine who will be enshrined for perpetuity in the hall. Well, this isn't a normal episode. This is a very special episode. We have put all the nominations up, There have been 15 new nominees added to the remaining ballot And today we're going to invite some people to share their ballots and go from there. So why don't we introduce who we've got to? my immediate right is John Schneider. How are you doing, John? 0:01:37 - Speaker 3I'm doing great, Jamie. Always great to be here. Feet are wiped and ready to go. 0:01:42 - Speaker 2Excellent, oh, i didn't say it The one time I don't say it. 0:01:46 - Speaker 3We don't just say you know like it's not like a foot fetish thing. Jamie always introduces and tells people to wipe their feet. So it's not John being, you know, having a fit thing. 0:01:56 - Speaker 4I think John just kind of a little revealing about himself. actually, That's my takeaway. 0:02:00 - Speaker 3I mean, they do call this the SNL Hall of Feet. Right, That's where we are. 0:02:04 - Speaker 4Yes, of course John's not on his show, so he's getting a little racy. 0:02:08 - Speaker 2We don't got the teens listening in. He's got the host belt off. 0:02:14 - Speaker 3Let's go. 0:02:16 - Speaker 2All right, Andrew. Hey, how's it going I? 0:02:19 - Speaker 5am super duper, feeling great. It's very sunny here in Toronto. 0:02:23 - Speaker 2Excellent. And Andy Hogland, how are you doing? 0:02:27 - Speaker 4Hey, I'm going. Good man, It's Hogland. Though I'm just going to be straight, It's pronounced Hogland. 0:02:31 - Speaker 2Did I just do it. I just asked you and then I did it. 0:02:34 - Speaker 4You just asked me, so that's why I'm calling it out. 0:02:35 - Speaker 2Oh that's great. No, you can totally do that, because No, I'm feeling good, man. 0:02:39 - Speaker 4I'm surrounded by a couple of Canadians, which is cool. I've never had that before. It's like having an orgy with Justin Trudeau. Let's do this. I'm just keeping it racy. John set the tone. 0:02:52 - Speaker 3Yeah, I thought we were just doing foot stuff. Andy, You took it to a whole other level. 0:02:57 - Speaker 2All right, let's dive into our program today. The first thing I want to do is to remind everybody who is currently in the SNL Hall of Fame We've had two wonderful seasons and we've inducted three separate classes. The inaugural class was, of course, lauren Michaels. In this class of season one, we inducted Dan Ackroyd, chris Farley, tina Fey as a writer, phil Hartman, steve Martin as a host, eddie Murphy and Gilda Radner All, if they weren't noted, were cast members. Then the class of season two we had Alec Baldwin as a host, will Ferrell as a cast member, bill Hader as a cast member, tom Hanks as a host, norm MacDonald as a cast member, seth Meyers as a writer, mike Meyers as a cast member and Kristen Wiig as a cast member. So pretty highfalutin company to be rubbing elbows with. But we've got a really excellent list of nominees and I just want to go through them for you before we kick off the show, because this is a stellar list right here. Amy Poehler, beyonce, Bill Murray, bach, henry, candice Bergen, christopher Walken, conan O'Brien, dana Carvey, dave Grohl, dick Ebersol, drew Barrymore, elliott Gould, elvis Costello, emma Stone, frank and Davis, herb Sargent, jack Handy, james Downey, jan Hooks, jane Curtin, john Belushi, john Goodman, john Malaney, justin Timberlake, lily Tomlin, maya Rudolph, melissa McCarthy, michael O'Donohue, miley Cyrus, molly Shannon, paul McCartney, paul Rudd, paul Simon, paul LaPell, prince, rihanna, robert Smigel, scarlett Johansson, the Lonely Island and Tom Pretty and the Heartbreakers Guys, this would be a great if this was the lineup for the 50th anniversary show. you would be like that's a pretty freaking good lineup. 0:05:06 - Speaker 4And how did John Belushi get out of his get out of hell? 0:05:11 - Speaker 2Oh boy, oh boy, it's on already. Well, no comment, let's jump right into it. Then We'll start to my right with John, and the way we'll do this is John will announce one of his nominees. I will tabulate it here. I've got a little sheet that I'm keeping keeping score with to make sure that everybody stays in their allotment of 15 votes up to 15 votes and to make sure that everybody elects at least one of each of the four main categories. There's been a lot of questions with Dick Abrasall being nominated and he does not fall into any of the four categories. Currently He is a producer and that's where he'll stay. So John is going to name his first ballereteer and then I'll go to Andy and Andrew to ask if they have them on their ballot and we'll go from there. That's how this show is going to work. Let's do it, john, with your first pick. Who have you got? All right, you're on the clock. 0:06:10 - Speaker 3This is a stacked lineup of people to choose from, but looking through there is one person that I looked at this list and said there is no question whatsoever that they should not be on everyone's ballot. This person has to get into the SNL Hall of Fame and it might be a little bit of a hot take, an unconventional pick, but it's Amy Poehler. And the reason why it's Amy Poehler is because she has the highest sketch per episode average among women in the history of the show. If you take out Charlie Rocket, she's actually top four among everybody in the history of the show. Before she was on the show, the show was on for 28 years or 27 seasons. There had never been a woman who led a season in sketch appearances until Amy Poehler did that. To me she is fantastic. Did weekend update, had amazing characters, impressions, blended a couple of eras. To me she is a surefire Hall of Famer. Slam Dunk. 0:07:10 - Speaker 2Wow, you heard it here first. Folks Slam Dunk, Andy, what do you think? 0:07:16 - Speaker 4Respectfully, amy is not on my ballot. Actually I totally understand John's rationale. I will say just as a bit of context you know, when Ryan Tibbs, when he circulates all the Hall of Fame ballots for baseball every year, i'm always fascinated by the rationale that individual voters give or don't give. I just think it's really fascinating color. So just for the listeners to adjust their radio dials to my frequency a little bit. I followed two rules when I came up with my ballot. The first is Justice Potter Stewart's famous phrase where he described his threshold for obscenity in his 1964 landmark Supreme Court decision, jacob vs Ohio, and I know it when I see it, which is to mean I instinctively have a very pure bar for who belongs or does not belong in the Hall of Fame, like Ted Knight and Caddyshack. But the second is also like baseball sportswriters, i'm leaning a little bit towards the historic picks, you know, and I'm a little disinclined to give it to some of the newer cast members. So Amy unfortunately sort of fell into that category a little bit where I just my mind went to more towards people in the 70s or 80s And Amy I kind of associate with some of the newer eras, even though it has been 20 years So she's not on my ballot And honestly she kind of mugs it a little bit for me So I don't like the mugging and I was just disinclined with everyone else who was available. 0:08:51 - Speaker 2Wow, shots fired. Yeah, Andrew, Mr Clark, I can do that too. 0:08:58 - Speaker 5Yes, i did have Amy on my ballot because I think that she was important for the show, for the success of that show and making it sort of, you know, rejuvenate itself when it did. And also I kind of see Amy Poehler and Tina Fey as being very important as influences in comedians who are now in their early 20s, who are inspired by those two. So I kind of number one her contributions, the characters that she brought, the writing that she brought, all of those strengths And then also, i think, her importance almost as something that people aspire to become. So now we have all these wonderful young comedians, female and female identifying comedians, who are doing a lot of work. So I kind of give her her props. But I could see and I agree 100% with Andy that you know we're going to get as we go down the list. There are some people who are very, very significant in the history of the show In the 70s. It may be people who just started watching in the last five to 10 years who recognized who. We're going to disappoint each other today, i guess, is what I'm trying to say, but I got to tell you I think Amy belongs in the whole thing. 0:10:11 - Speaker 4Can I challenge John on air right now? You can do whatever you want. John, if I'm not mistaken, I believe you and I are aligned that several of Amy's years are among the shows worse, is that not accurate? 0:10:28 - Speaker 3Yes, there are a couple in there that are rough. 0:10:33 - Speaker 4So, john, i just want to throw that out, not to call out, but being the best of the worst, that is a crazy argument, stop this. 0:10:42 - Speaker 3I'm sorry this is a crazy argument, because if you're going to say that, then we're saying anyone who participated in those two years. The fact is that Amy Poehler was not a cast member for those two years. She was a cast member for much longer, like I said, for six years in a row, from 2002 to 2008,. every single season she led the cast in sketch appearances. To me, she dominated those years on the show which, by the way, weren't just those two bad years. they led into a golden era of the show, probably for the first time in a generation. So I respect and I will have people on my ballot who were on the show in the 70s and the 80s, but we're not doing the Hall of Fame of the 70s, we're doing the Hall of Fame of Saturday Night Live and, let's be real, amy Poehler has been a major part of the second half of the existence of the show. 0:11:27 - Speaker 4Yeah, no argument, just wanted to get that on the record briefly, just for full context, that John does think Amy's era is among the worst. 0:11:37 - Speaker 3I did not know. That is not what I think, but I'll fight you on that another time. 0:11:44 - Speaker 2Yeah, let's move forward here and, Andrew, we're going to continue with you. 0:11:48 - Speaker 5Okay, well, my pick is somebody who, without whom I don't think there would be have been any history of Saturday Night Live. It's someone who, when he sadly passed away, my friends and I held a toga party for which I was roundly punished by my parents. We were at the ripe old age of 16. I'm talking about John Belushi. So I believe that John Belushi absolutely has to be in the Hall of Fame because he and that cast, and him and Dan Acroy particularly, were really what made the whole thing explode. Chevy Chase was a huge part of it, but I think they were the engine that really ran the show And he was the first true, true breakout star. He had a much brighter trajectory, if you ask me, than Chevy Chase. I'm going to. I got to say John Belushi's hands down, in my opinion, has to be in. 0:12:39 - Speaker 2Great pick. 0:12:40 - Speaker 4Thank you, andy, totally agree, yeah, i mean. any words to use to describe John Belushi's legacy on SNL or in comedy have already been uttered before, so I don't have too much to contribute beyond that. continental divide is an underrated romantic comedy. 0:13:00 - Speaker 2All right, mr Schneider, he is definitely on the list. 0:13:04 - Speaker 3I'm of the belief that every original cast member should be in the Hall of Fame just by default for what it's worth. But you know there would be. You know Saturday Live was was good and Chevy obviously brought a lot, but there was nothing like the energy that John Belushi brought to the show, like he made it a, like he made it must watch television because he never knew what he was going to do on a given night, starting all the way from the beginning with the Joe Cocker stuff, moving to the Blues Brothers stuff, like everything. He was a force. So you know, like Andy said, there's been so much written about him. If you know SNL, you know John Belushi, even if he's been gone for so many years, and that's a testament to the legacy of him. So I think it's a no brainer to put him in. 0:13:40 - Speaker 2Yeah, so that's our first, our first, well, in honor of the new Zelda game, our first try for us. So, andy, who have you got up? 0:13:51 - Speaker 4I have Bill Murray, who is arguably the the most accomplished and talented cast member to come out of the show. You know, i think you know. All all things being equal, he does have a bit of asterisk on on his legacy, courtesy of Kiki Palmer, but nevertheless his accomplishments since living leaving 8h are Unrivaled. Give or take a ghostbuster, you know, oscar nomination or Wes Anderson collaboration. But look like, even those merits aside, you know Murray is a pivotal figure in the show's history, the first replacement cast member. There's been what like a hundred and seventy cast members in the show's history. Eight or nine, like John just mentioned, are that original 1975, you know, upstart, not ready for prime-time players. You know Murray sets the mold for joining a cast in midstream, which is a path that almost everyone else in the show's history has has had to emulate in one way or another. And Look, i'll be honest, i'm not in high school anymore. The, that combination of smarm and self-aware irony that made him a legend to Letterman fans and and the geeks and freaks and geeks. It doesn't quite do it for me as it as it once did, but still honker, the nerds, nick, the lounge slinger, his, his awards commentary on update. These are essential early SNL characters. The show simply post-chevy, doesn't exist without them. So that's my argument and stick into it. 0:15:17 - Speaker 2John, how do you feel about Bill Murray? 0:15:19 - Speaker 3Yeah, i totally agree. He's definitely a shoe in for me for the Hall of Fame. His analytics are off the charts. He's also a top five sketchbook episode. Um, get her in the in the history of the show. Just, he was producing every single night once he finally found his groove, i guess towards the end of season two, and he, you know, you don't think of him as when you look back at season three, four, five, lot of people don't think of him as the star. But he really really was. He was so good and did so much. And I Totally agree with Andy. I think that the show is in a dark, dark place if he doesn't jump onto it when he did so. For me I mean, think about that, right, we talk. You know, we may end up talking about Jim Downey at some point tonight. I mean the fact that that Bill Murray and Jim Downey joined the show to add some life into it. When the show is losing Chevy, i mean it just incredible stuff. So for me Can't, can't have a Hall of Fame without Bill Murray. 0:16:08 - Speaker 5Well, we're breaking all the rules of podcasting and radio by agreeing with one another. But yeah, i Bill Murray absolutely. Some people get changed by being on Saturday Night Live. Bill Murray changed Saturday Night Live. He didn't alter himself. I don't believe at all. When he went on that show He had deep us. You know second city chops. The reports about him when he was in Toronto are legendary How he would deal with hecklers, we'll just leave it at that. He didn't take crap from anybody and he's had an absolutely stunning career, dramatically and comedically right. And I work with Robin Duke, who's just retired at Humber, and you know some of the stories she talked about. Bill Murray sort of Helping her when she was on Groundhog Day and Explaining how the cameras worked and how you had to sort of act in order so the editing could happen Shows you that it's not only kind of a creative genius, it's a real technical skill and an understanding of how movies and stuff work. So I think that all goes together for Bill Murray. I agree He's absolutely should be in there. Great. 0:17:15 - Speaker 2Wow, another try, force, boom. Where are we at then? We're back to John, right, yeah? Okay, john, create some controversy. I. 0:17:25 - Speaker 3Mean, i think, controversy was already created, when I suppose so yeah, well, even even going into last season, when the biggest travesty to be left out of getting into the hall of fame to me was Jan Hooks because that was that was insane to me. I mean you're talking about you know, andy was talking about what he sees when he looks for in a cast member. The eye test is definitely there when I was going away. Yeah, i mean this is, this is insanity. I mean she comes in season 12, just is Incredible, like, just can do everything that you possibly would have wanted on the show, and Just the heart and soul of that second generation, the second golden era of the show, and obviously we lost her and 2014 and it was just, you know, her, you know thinking about the stuff She produced with Phil Hartman, and stuff is so heartwarming, so many great sketches, so many amazing impressions to me, you know, i always, you know, hear from people who were Just obsessed with Jan hooks, absolutely fell in love with her on the show, and it wasn't even just that. She was, you know, so beautiful in the way that she performed. She was just so naturally talented and gifted to be on the show and it was so important For the generation that was to come. You hear Tina Fey and Amy Poehler and my riddle talk about how Jan hooks was so important. Tina Fey put Jan hooks on 30 Rock at some point. You know, like that's the type of thing that you know, she. She left a legacy behind and to me she needs to be in all of him. 0:18:48 - Speaker 2Yeah, i agree. She finished last last vote with like what 40%, 39.8%. She's got a long hill ahead. I'm afraid it's not gonna happen in this bet. She's round for her either. But but I agree with you, it's shameful. She's she's an all-timer. She's an all-timer, you know She's in. She's in the female rush more right or the yeah, the female SNL cast rush more. 0:19:10 - Speaker 4Everything that John said about Amy Poehler is true about Jan hooks. I'm gonna do a hot take that minus the analytics. 0:19:18 - Speaker 2Well that's. 0:19:18 - Speaker 4That's Mike Murray. 0:19:22 - Speaker 2So you have, you have her, is it safe to say, then, in your Hall of Fame, andy. 0:19:27 - Speaker 4Absolutely, and it doesn't. I don't even know why, why we should justify it. It's just, it's so clear to me that she belongs there. Why? why even let's have like like 30 seconds of dead space and then just move on. 0:19:42 - Speaker 5Yeah, i mean, i think part of what Jan hook and people in that cast suffer from a little bit is that that skip between Internet and not internet. So a lot of the stuff comes later. And so the other cast members, the later cast members, their stuff is available online a lot more easily than Jan hook stuff Because when it's getting filmed it's not been signed off copyright for Dispersal on the web and everything, so it's you have to work harder to get some of it. So I think actually there's just people who haven't seen what she did with Phil Hartman as much. You kind of have to be a bit more of a of an aficionado. But yeah, there's absolutely no question that the stuff she did with just with Phil Hartman alone is so iconic for that show. I mean, it's hard to imagine her without and the range of characters and also doing a kind of She kind of epitomized, the kind of like I don't know how to put it not po, yeah, post feminist Anxed, being run through Reaganomics and then through the Clint near and everything that kind of. You know, there was always a real edge to her material, even if she was doing like a sweet domestic character. 0:20:48 - Speaker 2Oh, she was great. She was just great. I just recently watched the diner, the Alec Baldwin diner sketch, and just So, so funny. You know, she's just natural gosh. Okay, so far we've had hooks on all three ballots. Another try force That one actually makes a triangle in my little, in my little spreadsheet that I made. Wow, that's funny. So we're gonna come back to Andrew Clark and I'm gonna challenge you to do something other than a cast member. 0:21:19 - Speaker 5Okay, well for me then I would go with Christopher Walken as host. Great, even though I spoke about Elliot Gould as host this season. I and who and I would make an argument for him too. But it's hard to make the argument over Christopher Walken because of his relationship with the show. You can almost give it to him just for cowbell, because it's become. You know that when your sketch has its own range of t-shirts Not just a t-shirt but range you know you've entered the vernacular. I think Christopher Walken Was a sort of must-watch host. People will always be attentive. He again didn't let the show really change what he did. He sort of brought what he did into the show. The fact that he has so many iconic Recur like characters as a as a host, i think is a good argument for Christopher Walken to be, you know, in the Hall of Fame as a host. 0:22:11 - Speaker 2Great John or Andy to either of you have mr Walken in the Hall of Fame on your balance, Oh right. 0:22:18 - Speaker 4Yeah, i mean, look, he has his own best of right, he has recurring characters. I mean, you know I don't remember offhand Deferred a John on the number of times that he's literally hosted, but you know, it almost gets to the point where when you have that, that body of work, you know You're, you're not, you're not a cast member, but there's just so much there that your, your, you know your tombstone deserves a reference to. You know You're time with the show. So shout out to the, the continental. And yeah, i totally agree. 0:22:49 - Speaker 3Yeah, same here He was. I'll say he was a little bit more borderline for me. Nothing against Walken, he didn't make my ballot, but he was. He was close being cut because there's a lot of really good options this time, including among those. I don't think he I wouldn't put him in the upper pantheon of greatest hosts in the history of the show. I think he's probably I mean, unless you're gonna put all the five timers there But I think he's that like next grouping and he's probably near the top of that. So for me there was a few of those on the list and he just made it. 0:23:20 - Speaker 2Oh, wow, okay, you guys have agreed a lot, so we'll go to Andy and, andy, i'll challenge you to do the same thing, something that isn't in the cast member category. 0:23:31 - Speaker 4Yeah, yeah, no, not a challenge at all. It's the, the next name on my list. Matter of fact, it's, it's buck Henry. Bring him on as a host. You know, one of the, the early, important hosts who kind of validates the show right Cuz, because buck Henry belongs in a Different comedic generation. You know, get smart and all that you know. But he's he's, he's a steady presence during those, those for five years, lending, lending a lot of credibility. And then, if I recall correctly, is the host of the, the final show of that era To. You know, and and John mentioned Jan hooks on 30 Rock. I mean, as as as Jane Krasinski's mom, buck Henry, as as Liz lemons dad was, was always so funny to me. But I think his, his tenure on on SNL throughout those first five years Definitely warrants his inclusion onto the hall and and has one of the the darkest sketches in the, the show's history. And I love when, when the show kind of makes, makes a bold play like that and it makes Child molesting part of the fun. You know, cuz you don't see that enough People are so uptight when you agree, John. 0:24:42 - Speaker 3I mean can't, can't, not watch Uncle Roy. Yeah, i mean, i got to talk. I was blessed to get to talk about Buck Henry on one of the episodes of the SNL Hall thing, so I've made my case for him. I am as big of a fan as Buck Henry, as you know. Anyone could possibly be. I think he, like, is so good He people say Steve Martin could have been a cast member. Well, i think Buck Henry could have been a cast member. He fit in so seamlessly. We talked a lot about Buck being the one who would take the sketches that no one else wanted to take. That is such an important Rule as a host and I do believe for decades. When they, you know, bring on hosts, they use Buck Henry as a template for what they look for if a host will return or not. They judge them on the Buck Henry category, like did you do the buck stuff? and I think that he is just to me. We talked I mentioned, you know, the upper pantheon of hosts. I think he's in that, that top room of greatest hosts in the history of the show. 0:25:39 - Speaker 5Andrew, yeah, you're probably gonna regret me on the show because I'm just gonna keep going. Oh yeah, that guy was great. But with Buck Henry I think the other thing that he did for the show was he lent a certain gravitas to the show because you remember, he's someone who Work, you know, adapted cash 22, he did the owl in the pussycat, he worked as a co-writer on the graduate, so he's kind of like Hollywood Hip and so being on Saturday Night Live really I think gave that element to to the show and, of course, to him as well. And then he did. He did so fantastically and he's always so game. So I agree with John's point. Like, if you know, when you talk, when you hear people interviewed who was a great host, they always seem to say cast members It doesn't matter what cast say that the host was game, they were willing to try, they're willing to do something. And you got that in spades with Buck Henry. He was obviously happy to be there and, yeah, some seminal characters and and a lot of his work later. I still love his work in the player you know it's the graduate, but with the stroke I mean he had those improvisational chops that he brought to the show or heaven can wait. 0:26:45 - Speaker 4He's great in that. 0:26:46 - Speaker 2There you go another try for Stryforce. Holy John, will you throw a Curveball here and strike us out? I'm gonna challenge you again to Pick from another category. 0:27:00 - Speaker 3Sure, I would love to other than cast members. I mean I'm gonna try and do something that I've been trying to do since this podcast started, which is get the lonely island Into the Hall of Fame. I mean, what, what is going on with people? I mean, do they not realize that they changed Saturday Night Live for the better? like, the show you're watching now is Influenced by the Lonely Island more than most of the names on this list. Like, let's just be real. So You know, and and outside of SNL was often, you know, influenced by the Lonely Island, including a lot of things you see on social media now. So, but you know, for just talking about what happened on the show, i mean, these guys came in, they wrote Brilliant pre-tape sketches. They went viral. People who were not watching Saturday Night Live came back to the show because of the things that the Lonely Island was producing. They were largely responsible for creating cast members becoming huge stars And as hosts as well. I mean they would bring in, you know, hosts into these Music videos or sketches that they were doing and then people would learn and get to know these hosts and they would become bigger Stars outside of the show. And then, you know, every now and then, they throw in this random Music video with an artist that would just come in. It's like, oh my god, t-pain this year now, like just the craziness that they would get into. I mean, for there's a lot of hyperbole when it comes to the Lonely Island, but I think it's well deserved, because they are some of the greatest writers in the history of the show. 0:28:19 - Speaker 2Absolutely 100%. The most baffling thing so far that has occurred in in the Hall of Fame is the voting for the Lonely Island 52% to start and last year went up to 62.6%, just a smidge under the requisite 66.6, but I just can't figure it out. The. I've made a correction on the ballot this year and I've included any of the group for David Frank and the Davis, for example. I have a parenthetical Al Franken, tom Davis, i have for Lonely Island. I haven't broken down by their members too, so people can see maybe Andy Sandberg and Have a better understanding. We'll see, we'll see. Does anybody else have the Lonely Island on their ballot? 0:29:07 - Speaker 5I didn't, and I think that says more about me than it does. The Lonely Island, to be quite honest, because I think John made a very strong case and I think they're heard a little bit by being a group to be honest, and not just a person. And then when I think about McGroober, which is my favorite film of all time, and that it comes out of the Lonely Island with Jorma Directing it, that I'm almost to just make the Lonely Island put them back onto my ballot just based on that, that McGroober comes out of it, yeah, i would just say they weren't on mine. I think that has more to say about me than it does to say about the Lonely Island, quite honestly, because I Don't think at the time when I was watching it that I understood how important those videos were for bringing new viewers to the show via Online, not through traditional broadcast. And then, of course, later on, i don't want to go on and on, but, like you know, never stop, never stop, stopping. It comes out of it. Yeah, what was like one of my daughter had like on a loop. So I again I think I'm gonna plead the old man card slightly here and so I will yield, if need be to put them on. I'm gonna push over, i'm afraid, but but they weren't on, but that doesn't mean they don't deserve to be. Do you have to be far too agreeable? I'm sorry, i apologize. 0:30:21 - Speaker 2I will start to be mean. Do you have space on your ballot? Did you use all 15 votes? I'd have to get rid of somebody. 0:30:30 - Speaker 5Let's see, it would have to be. It would have to be a writer, wouldn't it? Well see, i have Jackhand. Well, i shouldn't give it away, so I would have to give away somebody. Can I wait and see? 0:30:42 - Speaker 3Yes, We're gonna convince you Yeah. 0:30:44 - Speaker 5Yes, i'll put them on ice for Andy. 0:30:47 - Speaker 2Where are you at? Do you have a lonely island on yours? 0:30:49 - Speaker 4I'm embarrassed to say that they're not on mine. I I totally, totally agree with everything that John said. You know, we were definitely still in the shadow of the Lonely Island. You know, 15 years later. You know, please don't destroy P Davidson and Chris Redd, like these guys are making just really pale imitations of what Lonely Island did. And you can't write the the history of YouTube without Lonely Island, right? like you really can't. I'm embarrassed, but my philosophy going into this was it's they'll have time to to make it into the Hall of Fame. You know Buck Henry won't. You know Buck Henry's dead. He's not coming back. 0:31:27 - Speaker 3The list is not on the show anymore, andy. I just want you to know that they're not producing new content. They're both Buck Henry and the Lonely Islands. Their careers at SNL are done. Come back and host like there's, but this is not an. Andy Samberg hosting thing. This is the Lonely Island writers on the show as writers on the show See okay, Well, all right. 0:31:46 - Speaker 2Well, let's get cute about this, You know okay so you're gonna be nominated at some point, i'm sure. 0:31:51 - Speaker 4Hold on, let's, let's, let's just double check for a second. So it says Lonely Island as a writer. So that means it's not really the videos, right, it's about they wrote all the videos? Well, yes, but when you watch those videos you're like the writing is really what makes it here. You know, or is it Andy Samberg's performance, or is it T-Pain singing? So if we want to get cute for a second, maybe it's not that at all. 0:32:16 - Speaker 3It's. It's the writing. What this is insane. 0:32:18 - Speaker 2This is what you're. If you're a sketch troupe, you you know you're you're likely going to be Attributed writer status to everything you do, whether it's you know Performance or or not you know. 0:32:34 - Speaker 4I guess my point is maybe Right. It would be a Hall of Famer as a cast member. Maybe Lonely Island, maybe it's not their time yet, i don't know. There's there's a lot of, there's a lot of competitive people here and You know, if I want to justify myself Which I do, it's it's maybe the categories not right. Maybe they shouldn't be here as a writer right now. 0:32:56 - Speaker 2Interesting. 0:32:57 - Speaker 3Well, this is the most insane thing I've ever heard. I love Andy, i this is insane. Okay, nobody is walking around being like oh yeah, i love it. When Rihanna was like that, like oh yeah, that was that, you know. Like it was the Lonely Island It wasn't the people appearing in the sketches with them Like that was great, that was a cherry on top, but this is an insane take. Well, i'm not sure what that meant, but, okay, sorry you, you drove me nuts, that's what. I don't know who Rihanna is. First of all, sorry, canadians. 0:33:31 - Speaker 4Look, look, i mean, this is an important argument to have. I just wonder. I mean the McGroober thing that almost if you guys want to call me out on my BS here, you should say they wrote McGroober, they should be in, you know they wrote McGroober They should be in. 0:33:49 - Speaker 3There you go. 0:33:51 - Speaker 5I'm easily pushed around. I just want to establish that. I hope I've established that for anybody watching, listening at the moment. Yeah, i'm gonna come up tough soon, believe me. 0:34:00 - Speaker 4It was Samberg as a cast member, i'd be like, hmm, but I don't know. Does the whole group deserve to be in? yes, maybe maybe not a couple of cobley Maybe, so I think so. 0:34:11 - Speaker 3Sorry, jamie, i know, i know we don't like to do 20 minutes on the Lone Island, but I just have to ask just one more question. Yeah, just just just as sink Lee explained to me your thesis statement for why the Lonely Island should not be in the Hall of Fame right now. 0:34:24 - Speaker 4Absolutely So. As I said at the start of this podcast you know, if, john, you want to rewind a couple minutes I said that my approach is similar to the sports writers who, philosophically, have blinders on and say I'm not, not anyone from the stair from the steroids era. You know, there's sports writers who say Clemens bonds, they just don't deserve to be in. Or they say, oh well, maybe this person will get in on a later ballot, but right now, historically, i want to get Michael O'Donoghue in, or I want to get Harold Baines in, or whatever you know. So it's just that my argument is more philosophic than it is a Representation of their legacy on the show, because what you said actually was very eloquent and well put. But this is a competitive Conversation and there's a lot of other people who I think aren't in the Hall of Fame yet, you know, including Bill Murray, including, you know, for God's sakes, dana Carvey. They pick up the slots. The slots get eaten up, i'm sorry, by people who've been waiting for years, john, years. 0:35:29 - Speaker 2They've got the call now, though. 0:35:31 - Speaker 4Exactly. Think of Dana Carvey at home right now. You know with his sons What, how he's gonna feel when Jamie calls him and let him know. Do you want to deny? 0:35:39 - Speaker 2him that, no that he can win one of these. 0:35:42 - Speaker 3Oh wow. Let me just say to all the listeners as we wrap up this conversation Andy Hogan is unequivocally wrong about this. Please think about the history of the show and how influential these guys are. 0:35:55 - Speaker 4Think about how Roger Clemens and Barry Bonds aren't in the baseball Hall of Fame. That's where I'm coming from. 0:36:01 - Speaker 2Listen, they potentially cheated. They did cheat, but who? 0:36:07 - Speaker 4cares. So did Willie may. Willie mays cheated who cares? 0:36:10 - Speaker 2Yeah, I remember all right, all right. 0:36:12 - Speaker 3We were covering the show and then we found out that Yorma was doing steroids. Like how crazy was that. 0:36:16 - Speaker 2That's right. That's right. 0:36:18 - Speaker 4I'm sure they were cocaine is the steroids of Studio 8. age Balushi out Yeah right, all right, andrew. 0:36:26 - Speaker 2Who have you got next? 0:36:28 - Speaker 5I'm gonna make things a little controversial and I'm gonna pick Prince as the musical guest. Oh okay, i believe he was on four times. Every time is a home run. It's Prince, he's the greatest, like he should just get in on virtue of having been Prince. I'm a little bit of a fan, but I also think that Prince always brought a little bit of a sense of humor about himself, even when he was being the most Prince like, so to speak. And I also speak as someone who saw Prince live and He wasn't an absolutely Unquestionably probably one of the greatest performers I've ever seen. So I'm gonna say Prince as As musical guests. I want to put it out there Everybody, vote for Prince. 0:37:17 - Speaker 2Does anybody else have Prince on their ballot? 0:37:20 - Speaker 3I don't, i mean I love Prince, prince, i would die for you, but I just. But, yeah, i mean the musical guest category for me is as limited as possibly be because there are so many Like stacked people in the other categories. Yeah, so for me I had to pick one, maybe two, one that I think is at the top of that list, and fortunately there are other people that did have more influence on SNL than Prince did. 0:37:46 - Speaker 2I should think Prince has a career that the trajectory is similar to SNL. It's a few years off. But that first performance in 79 I think it is is like really, really good and He's sort of unknown. You know he's just this, you know Performer, one of those cool ones that you get to see on SNL and turns out they turn into you know A really big deal. And then the right parenthetical on the on the end of his career is just the legend of him playing the. It was the 40th right. 0:38:20 - Speaker 5That's right. 0:38:21 - Speaker 2The after party you know, so really interesting. Cool, andy, who have you got up next? 0:38:27 - Speaker 4My next person is Actually we talked about this briefly Dana Carvey. How is Dana Carvey not in this hall of fame yet? Is this really his first ballot? 0:38:36 - Speaker 2This is his first ballot. Yeah Well, because we produced the show where we You know having a lot of him every year. Right, it's staggered. It's just staggered across the board because I Didn't do, i didn't think of this idea in 1980. If I did, you know that would have been well, that's not here, nor that I mean to me. 0:38:54 - Speaker 4Dana Carvey, you could argue, is the best pure cast member in the show's history. So the fact that he's just now on the first ballot and isn't yet in the Hall of Fame, it raises a lot of Troubling questions. 0:39:08 - Speaker 2Do you think he will get a higher voting percentage Than the current holder, which is Will Ferrell? 0:39:17 - Speaker 4Probably not just because Will Ferrell came of age as a cast member with, with people who you know, maybe Participating this a little bit more. I mean, that's the only argument that I could really understand is that Carvey's, you know, made his debut 37 years ago, you know. so maybe people don't quite appreciate, but when I started watching SNL in the 90s I mean Garth Hansen, franz, Oh my god, absolutely, that's. 0:39:42 - Speaker 2That's why I started watching in 86. It's 91.8% is what will Ferrell got last year. 0:39:48 - Speaker 3Here's. The major difference, though, is that will Ferrell dominated his era, whereas Dana Carvey didn't. He's definitely on my ballot and I agree with the notion that he's one of the best Cast members of all time, but he is among a group of elite cast members, including Phil and Jen, and he slides into that generational group really well. But, yeah, the reason that I loved how Andy said best is because best is typically defined as having like the skill set to succeed on the show. Right, it's like are you a naturally born sketch performer that it was just built in a lab to do Saturday night live? Yeah, and a Carvey is that. 0:40:23 - Speaker 4So there's impressions. Yeah, i mean to John's point and this kind of goes back to our initial Conversation about Amy Poehler. You know, will Ferrell is on at a time that I wouldn't consider a golden age, you know. So he dominated. Yeah, dana Carvey is probably the best, or among the best, cast members of, obviously, a golden age, a second golden age Like murderers row, though it's like. 0:40:52 - Speaker 2You know how do you pick between Gary and and babe, right, you know what I mean. 0:40:56 - Speaker 4Yeah, i mean, they're both first balladers. 0:40:58 - Speaker 5Yeah, Yeah and he also. He's also working with Mike Myers, that's right. This is who's also and he's sort of garth to Mike. I mean that I would agree that he's definitely should be in, because if you try to order an SNL cast member over the phone and Then Amazon shipped it to your house, it would be Dana Carvey, right, right. He literally epitomizes all of the things that you would want and you know, i think he's, he's for me, he's, he's unquestionable. 0:41:26 - Speaker 2Cool, back to John. 0:41:28 - Speaker 3Yeah, so I'm gonna round out my cast category, if that's okay with you, jamie, with someone who I think was so important in the history of the show and that's Jane Curtin. She comes in to host weekend updates right after Chevy Chase and Jess absolutely crushes it, see. You know, shows everybody why. You know She was meant to do that job and it was. You know it was a man's world. Unfortunately, at the time a lot of people felt like it and like for her to break through that mold was so great. I mean, let alone not not not only the stuff on weekend update, but the fact that she would anchor sketches the way that she did and have like play that straight woman role so well, where she would be like you know, think about, like looks at books and sketches like that, where she would be side-by-side with Gilda Radner And Gilda would be doing a crazy character. Or her interactions with Emily Latella or Rosanna, rosanna Dana. She was like to me, the host of the 70s among the cast and She is one of my favorite cast members of all time, if I'm being completely honest. Just her ability to just show like the strength and poise that she did on that show when all this craziness was happening around her, so for me a she went as well great, nicely put Andrew. 0:42:38 - Speaker 5I got. You make some great points And I didn't have her. And again, it's no knock on her, but she wasn't there only because, although I think she was an integral part of that cast, if I had, if there was one person that maybe it's a terrible thing to say, honestly, it sounds like such an awful thing to say, but if she had not, if she, if she wasn't there, would it? would things be that much different? I don't know necessarily that they would, but you know, again, she's incredibly talented. Nobody we're discussing here is bad, let's put it that way. So if they're not getting it, it's not for any deficit on their part, and I think you're making some great points about her And I've heard those arguments made like, hey, jane Curtin was great. She's not getting her props by other people as well. So I don't think you're in a minority, john. So you know you make a good case, but she wasn't on mine. 0:43:33 - Speaker 3Can I? can I push back Andrew for a second? Because please? yeah, you discussed the like your argument is based in value, right? If you were to take Jane Curtin out, how does that change the 70s? So if you were to remove her from the cast? and then everything happens as is, so Chevy Chase leaves the show, who, to you, then replaces Chevy on update? and would that be better? Because I can't envision a scenario where that happens. 0:43:55 - Speaker 5Neither can I. I don't know how to answer that question. I think you make a good point. I guess it's more on the lines of I'm looking at my list and thinking who might? who would I bump for Jane Curtin? If it happens, i'd be happy. You know what I mean. If she gets in, i'll be super happy because I think she's absolutely brilliant. I guess you use the word host in a way. I think maybe she hasn't getting, hadn't got some of her credit because she was an anchor and maybe that's literally and figuratively, in an improv sense. She was an anchor at a lot of those scenes and the anchor doesn't always get all of the attention. You know, she's a little bit I hate to put like football analogy like the offensive lineman. They only get noticed if they make a mistake, if they do their job really well. It doesn't always get seen And I feel like in her cast maybe Jane Curtin was a little bit like that. There were other people getting all the press and she wasn't getting in the press for bad reasons, like bad behavior and those sorts of things. But I can't answer your question. I don't know who I would put in. 0:44:52 - Speaker 3I'm at somewhere right now. Jane Curtin is flashing her bra at the screen just hearing about getting some attention. 0:44:59 - Speaker 5Well, perhaps I hope so, John. she has Jane, I agree. I'm just getting dirty. 0:45:10 - Speaker 2All right, Andy, where are you with Jane Curtin? 0:45:13 - Speaker 4Well. So John detected I flinched a little bit when he brought her up and it's because, to be candid, about 10 minutes ago I realized, with the quirks of us picking one from each category, like Noah's Ark, i'd inadvertently left off a musical guest. So as we were talking, i had to remove Jane Curtin from my ballot. She was on there and I needed to add a musical guest. So, elvis Costello, today's your lucky day, but Jane Curtin unfortunately gets the stick, not the carrot. 0:45:46 - Speaker 2Wow, i'm pretty stunned. This is going to be an interesting vote this year. if you three are representative of the majority, i love to keep her on. 0:45:58 - Speaker 4But it's just the way this is set up. We have to include a musical guest Because, like I said, philosophically a part of me is like if Eminem's not on, i don't know if anyone deserves to be on. 0:46:10 - Speaker 2All right, andrew, your next pick. 0:46:13 - Speaker 5So then, I will be picking from the writer category because I picked a host, i picked a performer and I picked a musical guest, correct, right? And this is going to be very, very difficult for me because I spoke, i was happy enough to speak, about someone who I don't think I'm going to nominate Because does that make any sense? 0:46:33 - Speaker 2I mean, I think what you, the way it's put is, there's what? 45 nominees? 0:46:39 - Speaker 5Yeah, yeah. 0:46:40 - Speaker 2Something like that There's a lot of really talented people and you got to nominate one, but it doesn't mean that when you nominated them, maybe you were influenced by a couple of the other episodes. 0:46:49 - Speaker 5Well, no, i've got to. I got to go with James Downey as a first pilot. 0:46:54 - Speaker 2Yeah, I think so. 0:46:55 - Speaker 5I don't think there's. There's no show without him. He was the guy who also brought a certain impartiality to it And by that he always pushed back, whether it was left or right of center politically. He came to Humber and did a workshop for us and it was great to hear him talk about the work. And one thing I remember him saying was was student asked him about Norm MacDonald and the OJ Simpson jokes And why did they keep going? And I think he compared it almost to Thelma and Louise, like driving off the cliff, like they just couldn't stop. They didn't even dislike OJ or Embersol or any of those things, they just had to keep going. When you look at his influence, particularly on American elections, just some of his, yeah. So to me it's, it's Jim Downey for sure for the writer category, even though I would love to mention Jack Handy, who I'm a huge fan of. But I'm going to go James Downey for my pick today. 0:47:48 - Speaker 2Okay, well, you can have more than one writer. You can, you know you can do whatever you wish, but but I will say James Downey. I'm really interested to hear what Andy and John have to say to. Either of you have James Downey on your ballot, absolutely. You both do So, andy, tell us, tell us why he's on your ballot. 0:48:06 - Speaker 4Yeah, i mean, andrew, hit the nail on the head. You know Jim Downey was on the show. For what? Over 30 years. You know he's he's one of the most important writers in the show's history. He's one of the most important, you know, political, satirical minds or whatever However you want to put it. I love that. He's, even technically a former cast member. You know he just checks so many of the boxes and probably behind the scenes contributed to so many of the cast members that we love too, like he's talked about. You know his, his role helping Chris Farley with, with some of his characters and moments on the show, and not for nothing. Also want to shout out his, his role in there will be blood. Love his little part as Al Rose as well too. So I'm a huge Downey fan and he 100% gets my endorsement. 0:49:00 - Speaker 3John greatest writer in the history of the show No doubt gets in. 0:49:04 - Speaker 5Great, okay. Do you think that there will be blood appearance? was it was influenced by his appearance in? was it Tommy boy? 0:49:12 - Speaker 4or Billy Madison, billy Madison. 0:49:15 - Speaker 5That wonderful speech you know, I wonder. 0:49:18 - Speaker 4PT Anderson is a huge SNL fan, right Like he was there in those early 2000 days when he was courting Maya Rudolph. So yeah, probably I mean he's cast his smigol too in a in a punch drunk love. 0:49:30 - Speaker 2So oh wow, I didn't realize that was smigol Andy. Who have you got next on your ballot? 0:49:38 - Speaker 4The next person on my ballot and I apologize, i'm going alphabetical is Dick Ebersol, actually, who I don't know if that's going to be contentious or not, but you know, a part of me is like you can't write the history of the show without you. literally, he helps create the show in 70 and then he, you know, is such an important, you know voice behind the scenes that that allowed the show to exist until you know, norman Michaels came, came out of his hibernation, you know so there's no Eddie Murphy without you know, dick Ebersol, and just an important person in the history of American broadcasting. 0:50:17 - Speaker 3So why is there no Eddie Murphy without Dick Ebersol? 0:50:21 - Speaker 4Because while Eddie is under Gene Dominion's tenure, technically you know, ebersol is the one that doesn't fire Eddie and then allows Eddie to become as big as he does during his time of the show. But I appreciate the the pushback there. 0:50:41 - Speaker 3I was just gonna say like if you got delivered like a really good steak and it's like sitting on your desk like you're not going to eat it, Right, right, But he doesn't he doesn't, can Eddie either. 0:50:49 - Speaker 4You know, And I just I don't know. I think that it's still, you know, nevertheless it still exists, But I kind of think of it. As you know, the Hall of the Baseball Hall of Fame you got to, you got to have some executives in there too, you know. Or Melvin Miller should be in the Baseball Hall of Fame as well, Absolutely, And Ebersol, I think, is that kind of figure. 0:51:13 - Speaker 2So, yeah, that's my take An architect. 0:51:15 - Speaker 4Yes. 0:51:16 - Speaker 2Yes, john or Andrew is Ebersol on either of your ballots. 0:51:22 - Speaker 3He's not on my ballot for what it's worth. I do think he should be in the Hall of Fame and I think he should get the Lorne Michaels Honorary Award that you gave to Lorne to put in there, because I think he's of the category of his own. But I didn't put him in because, as he is known as his first name, he's kind of a dick, so I sort of left him off. 0:51:42 - Speaker 4Oh, that's the bar. 0:51:43 - Speaker 3Yeah, that's the bar. 0:51:45 - Speaker 4Isn't John Belushi on your list? 0:51:47 - Speaker 3Yeah, look, it's really hard to Oh Murray. No, the real reason, to be honest, is just, I'm looking through this and he makes no sense to put him in any category with any of these other people. So for me it's like his contributions are so different than everybody else here. It's like comparing apples and oranges to me, So I couldn't put him on my list, but I also know he needs to be in there. 0:52:09 - Speaker 5All right, okay, yeah, i didn't have him. I didn't have him, and you know there's some good points, but I don't know. I'd almost say, well then, maybe Rosie Schuster, only because she played an important part of those first few seasons. 0:52:24 - Speaker 4When did she run SNL? 0:52:26 - Speaker 5She never ran it but she certainly played a huge role creatively. I know It was Mary Delorn And this very funny wrote for Larry Sandershow, but I would demure, but I do think he should be in, so I just don't know where you put him. So I think an honorary exec category, maybe we should start. 0:52:44 - Speaker 2The Miller category. That's a great idea. All right, there's a lot of behind the scenes. 0:52:48 - Speaker 5People are for sure. 0:52:50 - Speaker 2Yeah, well, i even think the announcer. I can't think of his name right now off the top of my head. Don Pardo, don Pardo. 0:52:57 - Speaker 4Jesus. 0:52:58 - Speaker 3Louise, right, like Don Pardo, should be in for sure I would recommend to the committee at the SNL Hall of Fame to consider a once a year award to just give someone an auto pass in. 0:53:09 - Speaker 4Yeah, dick Ubersol, don Pardo, jeff Richards, patrick Weathers, eminem, eminem. 0:53:14 - Speaker 5Yeah, james Spoons, but I mean Andy's making a good point, because it was Dick Ubersol, along with Barry Dillard and a few others, who approached Lord Michael's a bit. So he's sort of like is the opening of the door, so to speak. Yeah, i don't know how influential he was in giving Lord Michael's a long run. I think it was 17 episodes or something that they guaranteed. But yeah, it's hard to imagine. but I guess it's spoiled for choice a little bit here. 0:53:40 - Speaker 2John, who have you got next? 0:53:43 - Speaker 3So I'll put somebody in from the musical guest category who, to me, is going in just for being for really fitting into all categories, and that would be Paul Simon. He is not in the Five Timers Club, but he is an amazing host and musical guest in the history of the show, also very influential and, a lot of you know, creative, i'm sure, but he's becoming very good friends with Lord Michael's. But yeah, i mean, paul Simon hosts the most unique episode in the history of Saturday Night Live. The second episode of the show has some really, really great appearances. You basically retire. 0:54:18 - Speaker 2Paul Simon variety show. you mean Yeah, yeah, basically exactly. 0:54:23 - Speaker 3Basically retires on the show, most recently when Seth Meyers hosted the show. He pretty much retired from music after that. But you can see his entire career throughout the history of the show And you know I wouldn't necessarily if someone says, hey, like John, who's the greatest musical guest in the history of the show, paul Simon wouldn't be top of mind. But because Paul Simon is in the musical guest category and he also has those hosting appearances and additional cameo appearances, for me just his contribution to the history of the show would lead him to be my number one musical guest choice. 0:54:51 - Speaker 2Does he appear on any other ballots? 0:54:53 - Speaker 5No, not mine, Just Prince. 0:54:57 - Speaker 2Because he's Prince. You already know. 0:54:59 - Speaker 3No, no no, Why not Paul Simon? Like? what's the reason for not putting Paul Simon on the ballot? 0:55:05 - Speaker 5I guess I just like Prince better, but I can't make any rational argument against Paul Simon, so I'll just plead the. Instead of pleading the fifth, i'll plead the Prince, but I think that next to Paul McCartney, maybe Lord Michaels has a thing for Paul's, but I think as a musical influence. And I think when and I don't want to speak for obviously I'm not speaking for Lord Michaels, but when you I think he always saw the show as part of that whole experience for that generation which was so music being so important. Paul McCartney and Paul Simon, the two Pauls, are the sort of musical anchors of that show, so to speak, and of course, sir, i think, part of his identity as a baby boomer and a member of that waves. 0:55:51 - Speaker 2How about you, Andy. 0:55:53 - Speaker 4I did not have him on my ballot, as mentioned. I'm just sort of disinclined to have musical guests on here. It's just not where I went. The one that I have is Elvis Costello, like I mentioned, but John makes a excellent historic argument in favor of Mr Simon. 0:56:11 - Speaker 2Okay, Let's move forward, then, with Andrew's next pick. 0:56:16 - Speaker 5I've got somewhat of a I think we'll be controversial pick, which is Maya Rudolph. 0:56:23 - Speaker 2Oh okay, Why do you think it's controversial? 0:56:26 - Speaker 5Well, i guess when we start looking at everybody, i mean everybody's so impressive. So maybe I'm just getting starstruck. But for my money Maya Rudolph should be in the Hall of Fame because of her unbelievable character work and her range. Especially the musically Bronx beat was always one of my favorite Sketches that she did with Amy Poehler. So I see her as someone who belongs in the Hall of Fame. But I think if you're looking, you know, and I'll leave it to Andy and John but historically I think you can argue for other people. Like you know, john could say how can you have Maya Rudolph in if you're not going to have Jen? or like how does that make any sense whatsoever? So I'm going partly on my own instinct and intuition, which is not always rational, but I'm going to say Maya Rudolph, i have that I, and she was pretty quick for me to pick her, so I'm going to go for Maya Rudolph. 0:57:21 - Speaker 2How about you, gentlemen, is Maya Rudolph on either of your ballots? No, and is there any remorse here There? 0:57:29 - Speaker 3is I mean like some what? you've heard or Yeah, i mean, look, personal taste, she's definitely on my ballot. I love her on the show. She was, you know, the you know actually watching it growing up. Her leaving the show was one of the most impactful losses I felt while watching the show because I think that she's so important and such a great cast member. But just in terms of where we are at right now in the SNL Hall of Fame voting, there are a lot of cast members I would put above her And even in her own era I don't think she was ever the number one cast member And right now I'm voting in people who are really like dominated the field. 0:58:05 - Speaker 2Yeah, And I mean you've only got what? four votes left as well At this point. You know it becomes, they become more valuable, sort of right. Right, All right, Andy. 0:58:15 - Speaker 4Yeah, i mean, look, i like my Rudolph Again. I'm just a little disinclined to have someone who you know is part of this millennium. That's just again how I went about it. I'm a little bit more slanted to people from the 70s, 80s, 90s. Actually I have a lot of writers on my ballot, to be honest. But that said, one other historic host that did make it that we've talked about briefly is Elliot Gould, again kind of similar to Buck Henry, just someone who you know gets the show early on, kind of brings some cashier when the show needs it, helps, makes it hip, and I think generally people just forget about what a big star Elliot Gould was in the 70s. Long goodbye and whatnot You know. So he's next up. You know, i'm not sure if my comrades are with me on this one, but I think you think about the Mount Rushmore of guests outside, steve Martin and Buck Henry in the 70s. You got to go with Elliot. 0:59:19 - Speaker 3Gould, i think in the 70s, is what is key here. That's why I don't have him on my list right now. I do think he is definitely a Hall of Amor, but I just think that there's hosts that are above him, that transcended multiple eras, that I think are more impactful. 0:59:34 - Speaker 4I would say Well, let's not forget about his season six stint where he's in bed with Denny Dillon and Gail Matthias and whatnot. 0:59:42 - Speaker 3I'm not forgetting about that, but I think like you know him hosting. Thank you, my best. I didn't. I just think in a span of you know those, i guess like five years in one episode. It's still like all in the same generation for the most part. So for me it was a debate for me between Christopher Walken and Elliot Gould, who would take that last spot on my ballot, and I'm pretty sure that Elliot Gould would make my next year's ballot. But I have other hosts that I think are more important or personally ones that I think are more impactful. 1:00:11 - Speaker 5Yeah, i mean, i was between Christopher Walken and Elliot Gould for me and I actually was able to talk about Elliot Gould on the show And I think you know your points are great. The other thing, of course, was you saw his musical chops. Like he had a musical theater background. I think every one of his opening model was as a musical number And he was the first one where the female cast members pretended to have a crush on him. He was the one who came on the show and canceled Star Trek. So he's a lot of really great stuff. And I

The next time you're on the golf course and you hear the expression "Be the Ball", "You're The Lama", or "Bushwood Style"- the chances are good that those expressions came from the 1980 movie Caddyshack, starring Bill Murray, Chevy Chase, Rodney Dangerfield, Ted Knight, and "Gopher". Caddyshack has become a cult favorite among golfers and comedy lovers. In this story we discuss the main actors and their backgrounds, the making of the movie, and (loosely, because it was loose) the plot. Hope you enjoy it as much as I did researching it. New Twitter address- @1001podcast Follow Us! ANDROID USERS- 1001 Stories From The Old West- https://toppodcast.com/podcast_feeds/1001-stories-from-the-old-west/ 1001 Radio Crime Solvers- https://music.amazon.com/podcasts/a60ec356-c7d0-4535-b276-1282990e46ba/1001-radio-crime-solvers 1001's Best of Jack London- https://podcasts.google.com/feed/aHR0cHM6Ly9mZWVkcy5tZWdhcGhvbmUuZm0vQURMMzA0OTMyMjE1Mg/episode/ZGZjY2U4ZmUtNzMzYi0xMWVkLWE3NzUtMmY1MGNmNGFiNDVh?hl=en&ved=2ahUKEwifjrqi8-L7AhViM1kFHQ1nA_EQjrkEegQICRAI&ep=6 1001 Radio Days right here at Google Podcasts FREE: https://podcasts.google.com/search/1001%20radio%20days 1001 Classic Short Stories & Tales at Google Podcasts https://podcasts.google.com/feed/aHR0cHM6Ly9mZWVkcy5tZWdhcGhvbmUuZm0vQURMNzU3MzM0Mjg0NQ== 1001 Heroes, Legends, Histories & Mysteries at Google Podcasts: https://podcasts.google.com/search/1001%20heroes 1001 Sherlock Holmes Stories (& Tales from Arthur Conan Doyle) https://podcasts.google.com/search/1001%20sherlock%20holmes 1001 Ghost Stories & Tales of the Macabre on Spotify: https://podcasts.google.com/search/1001%20ghost%20stories 1001 Stories for the Road on Google Podcasts https://podcasts.google.com/search/1001%20stories%20for%20the%20road Enjoy 1001 Greatest Love Stories on Google Podcasts https://podcasts.google.com/search/1001%20greatest%20love%20stories 1001 History's Best Storytellers: (author interviews) on Stitcher https://www.stitcher.com/show/1001-historys-best-storytellers APPLE USERS Catch 1001 Stories From The Old West- https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/1001-stories-from-the-old-west/id1613213865 Catch 1001's Best of Jack London- https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/1001-best-of-jack-london/id1656939169 Catch 1001 Radio Crime Solvers- https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/1001-radio-crime-solvers/id1657397371 Catch 1001 Heroes on any Apple Device here (Free): https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/1001-heroes-legends-histories-mysteries-podcast/id956154836?mt=2  Catch 1001 CLASSIC SHORT STORIES at Apple Podcast App Now: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/1001-classic-short-stories-tales/id1078098622 Catch 1001 Stories for the Road at Apple Podcast now:  https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/1001-stories-for-the-road/id1227478901 NEW Enjoy 1001 Greatest Love Stories on Apple Devices here: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/1001-greatest-love-stories/id1485751552 Catch 1001 RADIO DAYS now at Apple iTunes!  https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/1001-radio-days/id1405045413?mt=2 NEW 1001 Ghost Stories & Tales of the Macabre is now playing at Apple Podcasts! https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/1001-ghost-stories-tales-of-the-macabre/id1516332327 NEW Enjoy 1001 History's Best Storytellers (Interviews) on Apple Devices here: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/1001-historys-best-storytellers/id1483649026 NEW Enjoy 1001 Sherlock Holmes Stories and The Best of Arthur Conan Doyle https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/1001-sherlock-holmes-stories-best-sir-arthur-conan/id1534427618 Get all of our shows at one website: https://.1001storiespodcast.com REVIEWS NEEDED . My email works as well for comments: 1001storiespodcast@gmail.com SUPPORT OUR SHOW BY BECOMING A PATRON! https://.patreon.com/1001storiesnetwork. Its time I started asking for support! Thank you. Its a few dollars a month OR a one time. (Any amount is appreciated). YOUR REVIEWS ARE NEEDED AND APPRECIATED! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

GGACP celebrates the birthday (February 28) of Captain Stubing and Murray Slaughter himself, actor Gavin MacLeod, with this ENCORE of an interview from 2019. In this episode, Gavin talks about paying dues, playing bad guys, crushing on Marilyn Monroe, acting with (and without) a hairpiece and sharing a years-long friendship with the late, great Ted Knight. Also, Gavin praises Cary Grant, ad-libs with Peter Sellers, cuts the rug with Bing Crosby and breaks into the business with Martin Balsam, Martin Landau and Jack Warden. PLUS: Chuckles Bites the Dust”! The villainy of Big Chicken! “ The brilliance of Blake Edwards! A surprise caller chimes in! And Gavin and Tony Curtis share a donut! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

One of the greatest comedies of all time starring Chevy Chase, Bill Murray, Rodney Dangerfield, Ted Knight, Michael O'Keefe and Mr. Gopher.  Directed by Harold Ramis.

Episode 36 - Caddyshack (1980) - Full Review Movie PodcastCaddyshack has become a cultural phenomenon and the boys couldn't wait to rewatch this classic. The big question is, do you have to be a golfer to really appreciate this movie? Caddyshack is a 1980 comedy film directed by Harold Ramis and starring Chevy Chase, Rodney Dangerfield, and Bill Murray. The film is set at a country club and follows the antics of the club's caddies and staff.The film's comedic performances are its strongest aspect, with Chase, Dangerfield, and Murray all delivering memorable and hilarious performances. The film also has a strong supporting cast, including Ted Knight, who plays the uptight club president.The film's humour is a mix of slapstick, physical comedy, and one-liners, and it has become a cult classic in the years since its release. The film is also notable for its memorable scenes and quotable lines.Overall, Caddyshack is a classic comedy that still holds up today. It's a must-see for fans of the genre and those who appreciate good comedic performances.Please follow the Podcast and join our community at https://linktr.ee/borntowatchpodcast If you are looking to start a podcast and want a host or get guests to pipe in remotely, look no further than Riverside.fmClick the link below https://riverside.fm/?utm_campaign=campaign_1&utm_medium=affiliate&utm_source=rewardful&via=matthew

GGACP celebrates the birthday (December 27) of “Good Times” and “Roots” star John Amos with this ENCORE of a memorable interview from 2016. In this episode, John reminisces about everything from his days as a struggling comic to his breakthrough role on “The Mary Tyler Moore Show” to working with Eddie Murphy and James Earl Jones in “Coming to America.” Also, John remembers Ted Knight, cuts up with Tim Conway, shares the screen with Lena Horne and moves into Archie Bunker's old house. PLUS: Yaphet Kotto! Famous Amos! “The Treasure of the Sierra Madre”! Praising Ernest Borgnine! And the mystery of the misheard theme song! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Episode 145:   “The Joey of Korean War Dramas”The guys discuss the Top 5 series finales that conclude with a satisfying ending, and the best of cartoon animals.·        Marlon Brando as a cat?·        What was the most watched series finale of over 106 million viewers?·        Who auditioned for the role of the dog, Brian Griffin?·        Ted Knight on the Superfirends?·        MoveOn.org makes a petition to a dog back to the small screen?·        Which cartoon inspired the name of a well-known pawnshop worker?·        What was the 1st cartoon to win an Emmy? 

Chad Zumock and Tony Mazur were bored one day and decided to record a podcast. After a half hour of talking radio, Caddyshack, and Ted Knight, the Reverend Bob Levy jumps on board. Then Godfrey pops on an hour in to talk about the divide between blacks and Jews in modern society. Be sure to subscribe to Tony's Patreon. $5 a month gets you bonus content, extra podcasts, and early access to guests. Visit Patreon.com/TonyMazur. Tony is also on Locals! Visit CYBpod.locals.com and subscribe. Cover art for the Check Your Brain podcast is by Eric C. Fischer. If you need terrific graphic design work done, contact Eric at illstr8r@gmail.com.

To wrap up Hallowe'en Month at When It Was Cool, let's look at some spooky 1970s Saturday morning TV shows. First, the original Ghostbusters from 1975. Spencer (Larry Storch), Tracy the Gorilla (Bob Burns) and Kong (Forrest Tucket) are bumbling detectives fighting vampires, monsters, ghosts and the like. There's a little bit of Borscht Belt comedy, some vaudeville humor and a lot of silly gags. Some famous character actors show up as bad guys like Ted Knight as a ghost, Bernie Kopell as Dr. Frankenstein and Jim Backus as Eric the Red. If you loved F-Troop, you'd probably enjoy Storch and Tucker here. Then, after the success of Scooby Doo for Hanna Barbera in the early 1970s, there were quite a number of mystery-solving teens with animal sidekicks and we spotlight a couple of them: The Funky Phantom and Goober and the Ghost Chasers. Kids, when we say popular culture was better in the old days, just point to some of these and say “Not so fast.”

Drew opens the show discussing how he has been engaging with Twitter more and how that has been impacting him in a variety of ways. They also talk about a recent interview that Dr. Drew did where his guest posited that former President Trump's use of the word Hydroxychloroquine may have been the moment in time that our country's divide was supercharged. Plus, they take a caller with a "unique" offering from Ted Knight. Please Support Our Sponsors: BlindsGalore.com tell them we sent you Con-Cret.com/Podcast

Comedian Brad Williams comes into the studio fresh off his stint on Cirque du Soleil and shares stories about a woman who can hang from her hair and ‘the wheel of death'. Brad joins the gang as they get into Ted Knight's ‘Hi Guys' and Adam remembers getting roasted by the late Greg Giraldo. They take a listener call from a guy who may or may not have a story about a blind mountain biker. THANKS FOR SUPPORTING TODAY'S SPONSORS: BlindsGalore.com SimpliSafe.com/ADAM Fitbod.me/CAROLLA Geico.com BetterHelp.com/CAROLLA

Celebrating 42 years of Caddyshack with Michael O'Keefe -Michal played Danny Noonan and took golf lessons before filming-Yes, he sank that putt!-What was it like working with the crew - Harold, Rodney, Chevy Brian Doyle, Bill Murray, Ted Knight ...-Does anyone remember filming Caddyshack?-$6 million dollar budget, how much did they spend partying? -Yes, we talked Showtime's City on a Hill - LOVE that show ... so many great stories 

Today on the Rarified Heir Podcast, we talk to Matt Asner, son of seven-time Emmy winner, actor Ed Asner. Of course, most of us know Ed Asner as Lou Grant from The Mary Tyler Moore Show as well as the dramatic series Lou Grant that followed. But as Matt told us on this episode, Ed Asner was generational. To some, it was his seventies and eighties television work that made an impact. To others, it might be his work (and his voice) from a host of animated series in the 90s from Batman or Superman or Spider Man. Some know him as Santa in the Christmas classic Elf. Others know him as Carl Fredricksen in Pixar's Up. Still others know him as the bad guy from the sixties film They Call Me Mr.Tibbs and even others from mini-series like Roots and Rich Man, Poor Man. Regardless of how you know the gruff but lovable actor, Ed Asner was known as a consummate professional, head of the Screen Actors Guild, tireless activist for a variety of causes, and Matt tells us all about them on the latest episode. We also get to hear about Gavin MacLeod's bubble gum obsession, “Uncle” Ted Knight, The Compass Players who Ed was a member of that birthed Second City, Paul Newman & Fort Apache The Bronx, death threats as well as family LA haunts like Art's Deli, Madam Wong's West and The Ed Asner Family Center. The Center promotes self-confidence, balance and wellness in differently-abled individuals and their families. And it's all next on the Rarified Heir Podcast. Take a listen. Oh Mr. Grant!

The second episode of our season on the awesome movie year of 1980 features our pick for a notable filmmaking debut, Harold Ramis' Caddyshack. Directed and co-written by Harold Ramis and starring Michael O'Keefe, Rodney Dangerfield, Ted Knight, Chevy Chase and Bill Murray, Caddyshack helped launch Ramis' career as one of Hollywood's most successful comedy writers and directors. The post Caddyshack (1980 First Feature) appeared first on Awesome Movie Year.