Welcome to The Way of the Emotional Warrior. This show is all about mastering one's emotions. There are negative emotions that create downward spirals in our life. Then there are neutral and positive emotions that allow us to truly figure out who we are, why we care about certain people, ideas, and things. We will learn how to master and harness the energy of our e-motions to regain our power, vitality, confidence and quality of life. My promise to you! My show will explore how we can master our emotions. I will bring you not only opinions but peer reviewed science as support for what we are investigating. I will post new episodes weekly and aim to deliver quality content. This field is a true passion of mine. I truly look forward to connecting with you. www.kaiehnes.com Instagram: @way_of_the_emotional_warrior
www.kaiehnes.com This week we have a deep dive into how to gain insight into yourself and how suppressed childhood trauma and events can affect us as adults. I interview Ann Hince who has graciously shared her experiences and insights on how to heal ourselves from the Inside. Her website is: www.annhince.com Support this podcast
Ep74 Kai & Dr Heather Noone - Discussion on Neuroscience and Vulnerability Want to Learn How to Increase Your Longevity? Download your Free ebook @ www.kaiehnes.com Hello and Welcome to the Way of the Emotional Warrior Podcast. My name is Kai Ehnes and today we have a discussion with DR Heather Noone. She is a neuroscientist and psychiatrist. Our discussion takes us on the road of vulnerability. Support this podcast
Ep73 How Do You Speak to Yourself Want to Learn How to Increase Your Longevity? Download your Free ebook @ www.kaiehnes.com Hello and Welcome to the Way of the Emotional Warrior Podcast. My name is Kai Ehnes and today we will be answering the question of: How nice and supportive are you to yourself with your selftalk? Support this podcast
Ep72 Why Don't You Just Listen Want to Learn How to Increase Your Longevity? Download your Free ebook @ www.kaiehnes.com Hello and Welcome to the Way of the Emotional Warrior Podcast. My name is Kai Ehnes and today we will be answering the question of: Is there a better way to actually listen to people? This episode looks deeper into conscious listening. Want to be a better partner or simply a better human being? Well, listen up! Good luck. ~Peace End: I hope you enjoyed this episode and I will see you next time around…take care. Support this podcast
Ep71 Its Ok to Be Okay Want to Learn How to Increase Your Longevity? Download your Free ebook @ www.kaiehnes.com Hello and Welcome to the Way of the Emotional Warrior Podcast. My name is Kai Ehnes and today we will be answering the question of: If its really okay to be okay then why do we have such a hard time with accomplishing it? Good luck. ~Peace Support this podcast
Want to Learn How to Increase Your Longevity? Download your Free ebook @ www.kaiehnes.com Hello and Welcome to the Way of the Emotional Warrior Podcast. My name is Kai Ehnes and today we will be answering the question of: How can a big, really large WHY elevate my life? This episode expands on last week's topic of the importance and purpose of your WHY. Developing a strong WHY is super important. Imagine that every day when you wake up it is immediately clear why you do what is on the agenda for the day. Sound interesting? Support this podcast
Ep69 How Your Why Sets Up Your Life Purpose Want to Learn How to Increase Your Longevity? Download your Free ebook @ www.kaiehnes.com Hello and Welcome to the Way of the Emotional Warrior Podcast. My name is Kai Ehnes and today we will be answering the question of: How Does Your Why Sets Up Your Life Purpose. Good luck. ~Peace End: I hope you enjoyed this episode and I will see you next time around…take care. Support this podcast
Ep68 Selfcare…Achieving Balance Want to Learn How to Increase Your Longevity? Download your Free ebook @ www.kaiehnes.com Hello and Welcome to the Way of the Emotional Warrior Podcast. My name is Kai Ehnes and today we will be answering the question of: Selfcare…How can we achieve balance in our lives? Let's take a closer look at how we can accomplish this. Support this podcast
Want to Learn How to Increase Your Longevity? Download your Free ebook @ www.kaiehnes.com Support this podcast
Ep66 Stages of Love to…Somewhere Want to Learn How to Increase Your Longevity? Download your Free ebook @ www.kaiehnes.com Hello and Welcome to the Way of the Emotional Warrior Podcast. My name is Kai Ehnes and today we will be answering the question of: What are the stages of love? At the time of this writing, the current divorce rate in the U.S. is 44.6%. So, just under 1 out of every 2 marriages end in divorce. Hm…Do those lucky ones who fell in love and then propose think about this statistic? Let's assume that you want to be married for the duration of your lifetime. How can you find success in endeavor? It turns out that science has studied the nature of relationships. Its not necessarily about following any specific method of relationship success but rather knowing what's actually supped to happen and how you can extract from all those methods what works in your own relationship. Again, I do want to point out that relationships require effort. Leave it unattended and weeds start to grow and take over. Ok. I don't want to be part of the divorce rate statistic. What do I do? It begins with knowing the stages of relationships. Stage one is Falling in love. Passion energy is strong. A baseline lust type of passion. Alongside that builds intimacy but it does so at a slower rate. Neuroscience has shown that cortisol is secreted in these stages. This helps people to overcome the fear of this new and possible relationship. Yes you want it but Oh my, I am also nervous about what that means. So think about it, this initial stage means that there is a frenzy plus the desire to bond. This is great right? Well…it last about 6 months. So for these 6 months the relationship is fairly easy. You have full neurochemical support and can't make bigger decisions because of reduction of brain activity in higher cortexes. Let's say you make it the 6 months. Now comes stage 2 which is passionate love. You transition into quite easily and you are seeking safety and harmony with your partner. Things become comfortable and this lasts for years. Neuroscience shows that oxytocin is active in this stage forming strong bonds. Next we get to companionate love. The passion starts to decrease while commitment and intimacy grows. The relationship becomes one of being Best friends. Commitment begets the reward of intimacy. Intimacy is about being close. This is crucial for the survival of the relationship. That bond with someone is amazing. In 2007 Robert Sternberg coined the term “triangular love theory.” He stated that couples go through these 3 stages. He shows that different combinations and intensities of these 3 stages play out with couples. He also found that people progress in predictable ways. The key to what he found for this episode is that successful long term relationships have a combination of multiple stages simultaneously. Meaning falling in love and passionate love develop together. Throw in a bit of companionate love and something else can slow down a bit. In the end, strong long term couples continually put effort into all 3 areas of love. Time to see how it applies to an Emotional Warrior: If you are someone looking for the One then that means you want a healthy long term relationship with that person. Sternberg calls this consummate love. This is the perfect couple. Their sex lives are good, they enjoy being together with the other person, they are gracious through their difficulties and both people truly love Being with the other one. In addition, emotional warriors know that this type of relationship is extremely special. That means effort is at the top of the list. Both people put forth the effort. When someone needs support, the other person is fully there to give it. When things are good they are easy, when it gets more difficult then more effort is required. When both people harness more of their positive emotional vibrations... Support this podcast
Ep65 Frustration…What a Challenge Want to Learn How to Increase Your Longevity? Download your Free ebook @ www.kaiehnes.com Hello and Welcome to the Way of the Emotional Warrior Podcast. My name is Kai Ehnes and today we will be answering the question of : What lesson or lessons can Frustration offer us? I truly had all good intentions of continuing my segment on love and The One for today's episode. However, I am experiencing quite a bit of frustration over the past few days so I thought it might be of some value to dive into it a bit and see how being an emotional warrior helps in these times. Let's start with what frustration means. It starts with the feeling or state of being frustrated. Ok circular logic only increases frustration. So what is frustration? Psychology defines it as an emotional response to opposition. What is this opposition? It has to do with our goals and our will not being fulfilled or met. The research says that the typical responses to either internal or external conflict are often anger, violence, or passive aggressive behavior. I often mention David Hawkins' work on the levels of consciousness. He assigns number values to different emotions. 200 is the magic level that separates the lower, often damaging emotions from the higher level positive helpful expanding emotions. The definition of frustration shows that we easily get pulled or pushed into the lower emotional levels. Well, that's just great. You make a plan, execute the necessary tasks, lets say you even do everything right and something externally blocks you. Let's assume it's a block that you can not break down. The only choices are to stay or back up, or get around. Let's go through the options. First…you can stay put and keep running into the block. It will not give, only you get hurt. Second you can go backwards. The only way I read this option is that you end up hiding. Still the block remains. Blowing up the block is not an option. What's left is to get around it. As an emotional warrior, you have some tools available to you. First, do something physical like a workout. Get your energy moving in a healthy constructive way. With that edge of raw energy brought down a bit try going to the other side. Practice heart-mind coherence. Find a place where you can be alone for a few moments. Sit comfortably, take your hand (either one) and touch your chest where your heart is, with your fingers. Now try to settle in and focus on the area you are touching while breathing. Try to do it for 5 minutes. More if you can do it. This should settle your system down so that you can take yourself from the red zone to a calmer place. Now…can getting around this block bring something better? Sometimes the block may be showing you something that has been broken or in need of attention but you were not dealing with it. By problem solving from a heart-mind coherent place you can come up with more creative and beneficial solutions. Your mindset is what you have control over. Your responses are something you have control over. Maybe you can even get to the place, after you solve the block, where you can address larger questions and issues in your life. Yes we all get frustrated. Going to the Red Zone of the lower emotions like anger and violence are completely counter productive. We all have to deal with these situations. Remember that you are an emotional warrior. Leave yourself clues to that mindset so that when you get into crisis you can find yourself able to reach into your emotional toolkit and move into positive constructive thoughts and behaviors. When your heart-mind grid is in coherence, you get master your emotional turbulences. Good luck. ~Peace Support this podcast
Want to Learn How to Increase Your Longevity? Download your Free ebook @ www.kaiehnes.com Hello and Welcome to the Way of the Emotional Warrior Podcast. My name is Kai Ehnes and today we will be answering the question of: How can you create the One? Oh I am sure this sounds absolutely crazy. What do you mean you can create someone. Well, first off this not so much about anything physical but much moreso along the emotional and interior life. So let's get started. Last week we spoke about having to do some emotional and spiritual work within yourself so that you can meet the One. Think of it this way. Imagine that you are trying to find the right radio station. Back in the day, radios had a knob that you turned and this sort of wacky red or white needle would move left or right. Inside the radio this shifted the receiver to be able to pick up the various frequencies of different radio stations. There were 2 bands for the public. AM and FM. You gently turned the know until you found a station, then you had to turn the dial back and forth until had the best reception. Of course, if this was inside of a car you had to do it again shortly because you were moving which changed the reception. Good, if you did it right, you were rewarded with a great song and clear reception. In pother words you had to do some work (dial turning) the radio station did its job by sending signals. Connection established. Here is how it worked for me. In another time I was a singled dad of two boys. They kept me quite busy, so dating was sparse. What I found is what I think many people experience which is that dating was fun but like the radio example, didn't have the right reception. You know when you are scrolling through various TV channels but simply can't find anything that grabs your attention. Sometimes you even end up watching something you don't even really care about but you simply don't have the energy to ramp up for doing something else? That's what dating was like. Very nice people but I already had a very busy and established life. So I took some time off from it all and started to do the work. I had a large whiteboard and started to write on it what I wanted in someone else. I came up with a good list of traits. For a while the list simply sat there. Periodically I would add or remove something. I would alter the order of the traits. Then it started to take on a life of itself. What happened was life changing in numerous ways. One evening I was looking over the list and the universe sent me the idea that what I was asking goes in both directions. Was I actually living the characteristics of the list? I mean honestly, is it fair to ask anything of someone else if you don't exhibit those traits yourself. Here is an example: Is it ok to demand that another person be loyal and not cheat but you would cross that line if you felt like it? So, I gave myself the task of doing an inventory of each trait. How solid was I an any and all of those traits that I thought The One should exhibit. There were some moments of honesty I had to look into. This is what I mean by doing the Work. In all of the different areas of your personality, where are you out of balance? Then you step in with honesty and integrity, look at your short comings or excesses and seek help to address them. This became a lot of fun. I had quite a bit of work to do. It has been ongoing every day. What became clear was this: If you want the One you first have to Be the One. That means you do the work which is like turning the radio dial. You adjust your self (the radio) by adjusting your frequency reception and suddenly the right station will appear. In this case the right person emerged. I knew the universe was conspiring for this to happen. The events of my meeting My One were pretty wild. That will be another story for another time. What about the kids you might ask. Well, one day when I... Support this podcast
Want to Learn How to Increase Your Longevity? Download your Free ebook @ www.kaiehnes.com Hello and Welcome to the Way of the Emotional Warrior Podcast. My name is Kai Ehnes and today we will be answering the question of: Have You Found “The One?” How often have you heard about finding The One? You know, that one person out of all 7.8 something billion of us. Picture that for one moment. Here we are born into a certain family, in a certain town, in a certain country on this planet and somewhere along the line someone threw out into human consciousness that we have to find The One. Again, think about that…imagine being in a larger room with 200 people. Try finding someone in that crowd. Now magnify that to finding one person in 7.8 billion beings. How can you even know when it is that person? Maybe you have never traveled very far and you found someone you really like. How can you ever fully settle in? maybe someone is moreso The one than the one you are with? This can drive any sane person crazy. What to do? Well…enter prime time to being an emotional warrior. Neuroscience has various explanations of how the brain works and responds with its neurochemistry, evolutionary psychology has its own set of answers. Here are a few ideas. A good amount of research points to the idea that in many species, the females make decisions about a partner. In reaction, males have created various traits and behaviors to try to make themselves be noticed and more attractive. While this seems a perfectly reasonable order of events, why is it so difficult to find the right person to be a good match? Neuroscience has shown that the chemistry rush that overtakes our brain when we are attracted to someone actually do us a disservice. The logical reasoning part of the brain can not compete with the chemicals of lust. This is kind of funny if you take a second. We invest so much into our thinking brain but in matters of the heart and relationships it has to take a back set in the initial critical stages. Typically, we are motivated and learn by way of our environment. Rewards and negative consequences plus social media, throw in a healthy dose of FOMO (the fear of missing out) and voila our lives are in a way being lived FOR us way more than being lived BY us. So where do we start? In and with one of our most obvious yet elusive places…namely ourselves. That's right. Start with yourself. Do The Work. What work you ask? The work of developing and building yourself. We spend our entire life building the persona or side of our psersonality that we think we are supposed to be in society and the world. We figure out how to behave in groups, school, a job a family etc…we become really good at being what others want us to be and we ehtink they want us t be. This game start very early in childhood and continues on and on. Ony you can put on the brakes to this never ending frenzy and decide to investigate who you actually are? Wait…I know who I am. I am person X who does This and likes that etc…yes that's true but is that really you? How do you even know if you know yourself? From the point of view of an emotional warrior, you find inner peace and live authentically. With enough work you begin to live honestly. You master your emotions and live intentionally. Joy and gratitude and appreciation become part of your day to day. You become enmeshed in this life on this planet at this point in time. Now, you stop making other people into having to be The One. You can stop searching for one in 7.8 billion. You become the One. You light shines so bright that anyone and everyone else can see its beauty. Now the right person who has done their share of their own work can find you and it can be love at first sight. It is a lot of emotional, spiritual, physical work. Many bumps in the road. Love is a precious thing. How many songs, books and poems have been written... Support this podcast
Want to Learn How to Increase Your Longevity? Download your Free ebook @ www.kaiehnes.com Today's guest is Jeremy Sherman Contact: www.jeremysherman.com Join us for a provocative interview on the following topics: The origins of life, chemically and physically Humans are geared for symbols Effort for the being, by the being Human mind packs infinite possibilities into habits Doubt raises things to consciousness We want novelty We want freedom - to upscale yet avoid pitfall Freedom and Constraints What is love? Jeremy's book: What's up with A-holes: Advanced Psychoproctology for Beginners Language is confirmation Bias Support this podcast
Learn how to Live Longer @ www.kaiehnes.com Ep61 Huli Huli…Can Turning BBQ Over Help My Emotional Transformation Hello and Welcome to the Way of the Emotional Warrior Podcast. My name is Kai Ehnes and today we will be answering the question of Huli Huli…how the flipping of BBQ can elevate our emotions game. When I heard this term, it instantly made me think about how it can help in terms of personal transformation. Why?? Lets start with what it means. Huli Huli is Hawaiian and means turn, turn. In 1955, Ernest Morgado, a Honolulu businessman, served a group of farmers grilled chicken that had been marinated in his mother's teriyaki-style sauce. It was such a hit that he decided to market it with the name “huli huli.” Now you might be wondering how huli huli has anything to do with emotional transformation, right? Well, it means you can turn over parts of yourself that you might think don't need investigating. Lets look at you relationship for a second. Assume that you think everything is going just fine. Huli huli would mean that you lovingly ask your partner a question or two that you take for granted but might be lacking in their world. I want to really stress that you have to be ok with the answers that come back. But hey, truth is the right path. So here is an example. You are watching a movie with your love and the characters are moving through their story line. One character tells the other that they often feel lonely in their marriage. Huli huli means you have to turn turn your assumption about your relationship. Ask your partner if they ever feel lonely in your relationship. Maybe they say yes. Now you have a great opportunity to investigate further and make the changes that will improve the relationship. On the other hand, maybe they say no. You might think that you are off the hook but huli huli would say that you turn turn that answer as well. Maybe you make more effort to offer comfort and support to your love. Either way you are improving the basis of your relationship. Huli huli is a win. Turn over parts of ourself, your relationships, community, life perspective…on and on Maybe you are thinking why not let sleeping dogs lie. Well, complacency is the hobgoblin of little minds. As emotional warriors, it is our drive to leave no rock unturned and clean up our Stuff. Professor of Neuroscience, Michael Platt, shared the following in an interview with the HR Observer that: 1. Neuroscience research shows that opposing brain circuits support routine and divergent thinking. Innovation thus requires unplugging from rote tasks like email or filling out spreadsheets. 2. Neuroscience research suggests mindfulness meditation activates the brain's “innovation network” thereby boosting creativity. Brief mindfulness exercises improve both creative problem-solving and protect against stress. 3. Brain research shows that decisions can be either fast or accurate, but typically not both. There is a tradeoff between speed and accuracy. Generally, stepping back and slowing down improves decisions. The first point of the brain circuits divergent thinking supports expanding your emotional awareness. An emotional warrior can easily use huli huli to turn over their routines and assumptions gaining creative insight on how to uplevel their lives. Emotional mastery is complex. First there has to be awareness. Think of the old adage: If it ain't broke don't fix it but that was improved years ago into the statement if it ain't broke, fix it anyway. That's what this work is all about. Making yourself better and transforming your life is what its all about. Good luck on your journey
In invite you to Free copy of My ebook @ www.kaiehnes.com Ep60 Playfulness and Curiosity Hello and Welcome to the Way of the Emotional Warrior Podcast. My name is Kai Ehnes and today we will be answering the question How can you be more playful in your life? Playfulness just sounds wonderful doesn't it? Kids do this so naturally. Adults frown upon it because it is a thing of childhood and immaturity. A grown person can not indulge in something so silly. Seriousness is the name of the game. If it isn't serious then it simply is not worthwhile. What if we were to look at this little bit differently. Why does play have to reserved only for little children. Modern society frowns even upon teenagers being playful. To me there is a healthy balance when being playful as an adult. I am not advocating shirking all responsibility and simply running off into the wild blue yonder. However, it is very possible to simply shift your outlook a bit to seeing the world as a place for us to play. In my world, my soul has come to this planet to play. The work has to be done no matter what, that is part of being alive but the way you approach the work will allow you to simply live with more joy. Let's say you something breaks on your vehicle. Let's say you have enough for a 200 dollar repair but the amount for the repair is triple that. A typical adult will panic and immediately embrace fear, invoking scarcity thinking and thus not be able to find a way to pay for the repair without having to sacrifice something else that is needed. How can you be more playful with these “serious” adult problems? Enter curiosity. Let's try this. Instead of telling yourself and the universe how this repair bill is excessive and asking for ways to panic and not be able to afford the amount, try breathing and slowing your roll. Next, ask some curiosity questions. Like: I wonder how this bill can be paid? Wouldn't it be great to have several options of how to pay this bill easily and smoothly? Or…try shifting to gratitude… I am grateful that this repair bill is easily taken care of. I appreciate having a safe vehicle for my family, myself, and other drivers. Maybe play a bit by having the questions come from the vehicle instead. Like: The vehicle says, thank you for fixing me now because otherwise the damage would have been much greater. Or… I am so happy to see my mechanic friend again. Thank you. While all this may sound crazy on one hand, perception and thinking are the name of the game. The rules of the game are engineered to work in your favor when you adhere to them. Money opportunities will come your way if you think, feel and emote from a spiritually lawful place. Maybe you will think of something that you can sell that is never used and taking up space in a closet or a room. Maybe you will be offered a bonus. It all works this way. Part of the process is letting go of control over everything. This is a gripping energy that is not part of spiritual law. I want to point out that none of this about not caring or being dismissive. Quite the contrary, this about moving your own intention in a direction that will allow you to prosper. The neuroscience is quite interesting for the idea of curiosity. Researchers like Schulz and Bonawitz in 2007 and 2011, Piaget 1945, Loewenstein 1994 independently found that people like to solve information gaps and are intrigued by novel and unfamiliar items and settings. This means that we love to learn, explore and figure things out. For an emotional warrior this is very helpful. Mastering emotions is really about emotional freedom. This in turn is what allows our souls to play. An emotional warrior can incorporate playfulness and curiosity into their lives and live freely and peacefully instead of being hijacked by fear and their amygdala. Good luck. ~Peace Support this podcast
www.kaiehnes.com Guest: Geralyn Gendreau Book: Jungle Jean: The Biography of The Explorer Who Transformed Modern Parenting with The Continuum Concept www.junglejean.com www.geralyngendreau.com Emotional Mastery Mistake to fear emotions Feelings - short term Identify with it - thinking its you instead of something that happened to you moods - can linger for a longer time syndrome - identify with it so much that it can become a diagnosis train yourself to not have to slide into the negative emotions so far Self reflect, Self Correct observe the consequences of your behavior Some people release emotions and get over it others are heavily impacted by other people's emotions Genuine apology is about the remorse (digestive enzyme) it allows the person to feel the apology deeply, then forgiveness comes naturally Emotional Ecosystem Dan Siegel - Interpersonal Neurobiology impact each others' nervous systems with our emotions triggers do not have to be personal try saying "pass" you know your system will regulate you don't need to hold on to unnecessary suffering Story from Geralyn's book, read by author what we are trained as being awful that moment in time when you have a choice to not go down the painful route and instead take the other route you can remain in your center, in your heart, in your joy Support this podcast
www.kaiehnes.com Ep58 Interview with Dr. Debi Silber on Post Betrayal Transformation Dr. Debi Silber is the founder of the Post Betrayal Transformation Institute and is a holistic psychologist, a health, mindset and personal development expert, the author of the #1 bestselling book: The Unshakable Woman: 4 Steps to Rebuilding Your Body, Mind and Life After a Life Crisis and her newest book: Trust Again: Overcoming Betrayal and Regaining Health, Confidence and Happiness. Her recent PhD study on how we experience betrayal made 3 groundbreaking discoveries that changes how long it takes to heal. In addition to being on FOX, CBS, The Dr. Oz Show, TEDx (twice) and more, she's an award winning speaker, coach and author dedicated to helping people move past their betrayals as well as any other blocks preventing them from the health, work, relationships, confidence and happiness they want most. Founder: The PBT (Post Betrayal Transformation) Institute https://thepbtinstitute.com/ (https://thepbtinstitute.com) Show Notes PBT Instititute Psychology of transformation and human potential Betrayal - what holds us back - 3 groundbreaking discoveries Gender applications Women struggle with emotional betrayal, men with physical betrayal Shame - is it me? Did I do something wrong? Early Childhood betrayal Tools 4 step trust rebuilding Full healing means moving through 5 predictable stages the setup stage 4 legs of table - physical, mental, spiritual, emotional the shock breakdown of body. mind, worldview - vulnerable to disease, illness and stress Survival instincts emerge you grab onto anything that works, it feels better plant deep roots even though its not the right place low level emotions call in circumstances and relationships that confirm this you resign yourself - food, TV, alcohol, drugs - in order to numb the situation it becomes a habit, then lifestyle Finding and adjusting to a new normal not necessarily normal but you stopped the massive damage of stages 2+3 you leave your outgrown friends Healing, rebirth, new world view new experiences solidly grounded because you focus on the 4 parts TedX - transformation something terrible happens - worst thing ever - you can mourn it as long as you like if you choose to rebuild it, why would you rebuild it the same way The Gift - trauma is the setup for transformation you create a new identity take with you what you like, leave behind what does not work Victim mindset - stuck in stage 3 Support this podcast
www.kaiehnes.com Kai & Robert Riopel - Success Leaves a Clue Hello and Welcome to the Way of the Emotional Warrior Podcast. My name is Kai Ehnes and today we will be having a great discussion with Robert Riopel. Robert is a successful entrepreneur, coach, trainer, mentor…the list goes on. This is truly a fun interview. Robert makes it easy to believe in oneself that we can transform ourselves into an authentic life. Robert Riopel links: Free ebook: http://www.slac.rocks/book (www.slac.rocks/book) http://www.RobertRiopel.com (www.RobertRiopel.com) Facebook Show notes Entrepreneur, necessity Failure vs Feedback franchisee spent more money than earned personal development financially independent Transition to teaching financial freedom Overdoing my passion Negative non supportive habits Learning to take care of yourself Trains people Emotional freedom is possible Lost personal compass How do you treat yourself Be gentle Ask for help – vulnerability Vulnerability is a strength Growth minded person Willing to have tough conversation Bouncing back from shockwave of Covid shutdown Building training center Programming of low self esteem Find a mentor to model They have achieved what you want They will be the belief in you until you believe it yourself What is your gift? What brings you pleasure People forget what they want to do and do what they have to Truth is the greatest fear for doubt Work from 9-5, create your life from 5 to 9 Difference between being busy and being productive Block out Focus time Emotionally draining if you don't take care of yourself Self centered vs centered in self Find someone in alignment with your beliefs Start with knowing who you are Being you lets you help people who love you for being who you are Releases emotional weight Good luck. ~Peace Support this podcast
www.kaiehnes.com Links to Rich Lewis To receive my free centering prayer ebook: https://silenceteaches.com/ (https://silenceteaches.com/) To learn more about my new book, Sitting with God: A Journey to Your True Self Through Centering Prayer: https://silenceteaches.com/about-the-books/ (https://silenceteaches.com/about-the-books/) One on one coaching: https://silenceteaches.com/centering-prayer-one-one-coaching/ (https://silenceteaches.com/centering-prayer-one-one-coaching/) Show Notes Ep56 Kai & Rich Lewis – Centered Praying -Silence Teaches Us http://www.silenceteaches.com (www.silenceteaches.com) Centering Prayer Meditation Relationship with God Helps you become who you really are Remove inner competing voices that are not real Authentic life for emotional warriors How is silence a teacher? Centering prayer 4 guidelines Benefits to outside centering prayer time Sacred word – deeper explanation Not a mantra Word should not be the focal point Sacred method Internal image Breath Stare at a spot in order to avoid falling asleep You can't fail if you “show up” Reset button Reconnect Increase personal productivity Support this podcast
www.kaiehnes.com Christian de la Huerta Contact info: With 30 years of experience, Christian de la Huerta is a sought-after spiritual teacher, personal transformation coach and leading voice in the breathwork community. He has traveled the world offering inspiring and transformational retreats combining psychological and spiritual teachings with lasting and life-changing effects. An award-winning, critically acclaimed author, he has spoken at numerous universities and conferences and on the TEDx stage. His new book, Awakening the Soul of Power, was described by multiple Grammy Award–winner Gloria Estefan as “a balm for the soul of anyone searching for truth and answers to life's difficult questions.” To find out more about his work and receive a free guided meditation, power practices and a chapter from the book, visit: https://soulfulpower.com/ (https://soulfulpower.com/). Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/christian.delahuerta.1 (https://www.facebook.com/christian.delahuerta.1) Insta: https://www.instagram.com/christiandlh/ (https://www.instagram.com/christiandlh/) LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/christiandelahuerta/ (https://www.linkedin.com/in/christiandelahuerta/) Goodreads: https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/391544.Christian_de_la_Huerta (https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/391544.Christian_de_la_Huerta) Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/Christian-De-la-Huerta/e/B001KINR1K (https://www.amazon.com/Christian-De-la-Huerta/e/B001KINR1K) Newsletter: https://kb987.infusionsoft.app/app/form/unleashings-the-soul-of-power-email-list (https://kb987.infusionsoft.app/app/form/unleashings-the-soul-of-power-email-list) YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC4hOzeGdhkTcRxOHkV9tfbQ (https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC4hOzeGdhkTcRxOHkV9tfbQ) Website: https://soulfulpower.com/ (https://soulfulpower.com/) Website Author Page: https://soulfulpower.com/Awakening-The-Soul-Of-Power-Book/ (https://soulfulpower.com/Awakening-The-Soul-Of-Power-Book/) AllAuthor: https://allauthor.com/author/christiandlh/ (https://allauthor.com/author/christiandlh/) Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/290440885360555/ (https://www.facebook.com/groups/290440885360555/) Show Notes: Notes from interview: How to bounce back from emotional shock Ego perception a. Ego reality b. Victim mode i. Baseball center of stadium – we are the stadium c. choices made from this context 3. Why someone else can get to us – push our buttons 4. 3 brains 5. Amygdala hijack a. Shuts off communication with thinking brain b. lasts 8-10 seconds Offset – count to 10, take a breath Slow down breath Heart has to slow down Begin to relax Buy some time Activate thinking brain Tools We have to own our part Get honest Don't take things personally Filtered with past experiences Be the eye of the storm – choose how to engage Respond rather than react Focus on the breath Others trigger us because: We don't feel seen We don't feel respected Flatten the button so that no one can press it Reacting does not mean we are bad people, we are hard wired to react Blaming others or situations means we are giving... Support this podcast
www.kaiehnes.com Ep54 Kai & Dan Shockley on his Journey of Being a Hereditary Colon Cancer Warrior Today's show is an interview with Dan Shockley. He is a Colon Cancer Survivor who shares his resilience, overall super attitude and positive mindset in the face of an overwhelming diagnosis. I invite you to hear the story of a great story of dealing with adversity. Dan offers numerous tools for all of us to increase the quality of our life. Here are the links to his organizations. https://coloncancerpreventionproject.org/ (https://coloncancerpreventionproject.org/) https://www.ostomy.org/ (https://www.ostomy.org/) He also offers his contact info if you would like to contact him. dandrydockshockley@gmail.com ~Peace Support this podcast
www.kaiehnes.com Ep53 What…Bacteria Affects my Mood? Hello and Welcome to the Way of the Emotional Warrior Podcast. My name is Kai Ehnes and today we will be answering the question… Can bacteria really affect my mood? Have you ever wondered why your mood can shift instantly? I mean here you are, moving right along in your day to day and out of nowhere your mood shifts. Often, it is a bad mood vs a good one. So why does this happen? One possible cause apparently is bacteria. Specifically, your gut bacteria. Your gut is a biome and usually is healthy and diverse with good and bad bacteria. Somehow, these little passengers can affect various parts of our system, including our moods. Science is showing that they impact neurodegenerative disease, depression, among others. Have you ever had a gut feeling or that you felt punched in the gut by something someone said? The gut has neurons, cells similar to those in our brain. These neurons are why the gut is often called the little brain. Interestingly, it “thinks” acts/reacts faster than the brain in between our ears. A study conducted at Kyushu University in Japan, investigated “psychobiotics” or mood microbes to see if they could alter, more likely improve mental health. Reserachers use mice and the ones who were “germ free” produced two times the amount of stress hormones when under stress than normal mice. Let's put this into perspective. Science has shown that a healthy gut biome allows us to deal not only better with stress but that altering the gut biome can help with the treatment of mental health. This obviously has numerous parts for people. Think about the impact of diet, nutrition, exercise, feelings and emotions we push into our gut by nor processing them correctly. Think about it, whether food or feelings they have to be processed somewhere. If not, they get stored. The research suggests that the vagus nereve, an information superhighway connecting the brain and gut gets impacted. Fiber is not properly broken down. Even the immune system can get impacted as well as mRNA which impacts how your DNA functions. Why is any of this important? Emotional Warriors can control their moods. Of course mood shifts, even swings, but emotional mastery leads one to understand how to deal with it in order to not get pulled out of balance to varying extremes. If one of the culprits of our mood imbalance is the gut biome then it makes sense to take the necessary steps to maintain a healthy gut environment. Part of the issue is that we have become afraid of germs and therefore do what we can to minimize them but it turns out that we need germs to maintain a healthy gut biome. According to Professor Ted Dinan at Cork University Hoispital. Diets low in fiber can have a negative impact on gut health. I think that is amazing that more complex mental issues and simple mood swings can be affected by the state of our gut. Scientists are finding that patients with diseases such as Parkinson's and depression have unique biomes that are out of balance. They even transplanted samples of these biomes to mice and found that the behavior transferred right with it. Part of the life of emotional mastery is to know what impacts our emotions. It certainly makes sense that if our gut biome is that important to our well being, we owe it to ourselves to take a look. Do some research to what foods and supplements help to maintain a healthy gut biome. Not only you but those around you will thank you. Eat your fiber
www.kaiehnes.com Hello and Welcome to the Way of the Emotional Warrior Podcast. My name is Kai Ehnes and today I would like to celebrate with all of you my 1 year podcast anniversary. Woop woop
www.kaiehnes.com Ep51 Groovy Grooves Hello and Welcome to the Way of the Emotional Warrior Podcast. My name is Kai Ehnes and today we will be answering the question of: Are grooves good for us? Here we go. I heard the following statement: Grooves eventually build walls. These walls will box us in. Let's dive into this a little deeper. Grooves happen when we develop patterns. At first the patterns serve us because they create a repetitive set of actions and behaviors that allow us to gain control over our environment. Let's say that you do the same 10 things every morning before you go to work. Not only do you do the same 10 things but you do them in the same order. Again, it helps us to organize. This way we don't leave our home forgetting phone, wallet or keys. Oh wait…gotta make sure have our coffee mug filled with its great elixir
www.kaiehnes.com Ep50 What's Your State? Hello and Welcome to the Way of the Emotional Warrior Podcast. My name is Kai Ehnes and today we will be answering the question of: What's exactly is your state? What am I talking about when I say state? It is your current state of consciousness. What are you thinking, what are you feeling, what are you experiencing? All of these make up your state of consciousness. Let's set the context, as I have said in previous episodes, our brain is hard wired for our survival. It has a large portion of its centers dedicated to noticing and sending awareness signals of changes in the environment that could cause us harm. Having said that, it means that our brain can quite often determine our state of consciousness by focusing on a narrow sector of information. This causes a massive reaction in our system to respond to that danger signal. We respond with fear, anxiety, concern, confusion etc… A perfect example of this was the book/movie War of the Worlds. A perceived attack by invaders from Mars caused a mass panic reaction by people who believed the radio program. It turns out that it was a made up story but that was only after people had heard about it and responded to it. Those who reacted thought it was probably their last day to live and made their perceptions into reactions. Come to find out the next day that it was all a hoax. Point of this is that people lost their grip. Panic and mayhem ensued. The environment took over peoples' minds and reactions. When it comes to our own state of consciousness, you can see that it can get hijacked rather quickly with fear and anxiety based on the events in our environment. So what can we do about it? How can we be emotional warriors? Let's look at the 3 parts of our consciousness. There is a subconscious, conscious, and superconscious. Each has its own purpose, yet all 3 happen at the same time inside or of our being. The subconscious is like an engine. Think of your car, the engine runs and performs but without any direction. Then we have the conscious mind. Its job is to see the present. Of course that is usually problem based. Poverty, war, disease, economic issues etc… This means that if the subconscious needs direction, you probably don't want those orders coming from the conscious mind. Then from where should they come? Well, there is the superconscious mind. It is your own internal higher intelligence. It can be called divine intelligence, connection to source etc…point is, you have access to it. This is the place from where you are a creator. Imagine for a second that your state of consciousness becomes one of creation and those become the directives for that massive subconscious engine. It becomes a bypass of the craziness we see every day. Of course you will still monitor the present so that you can function but you are pulled out of the same old same old routine that minimizes our life experience into one of creation and excitement. So let's look at this state mentioned earlier. How do you access it when we so entangled in the news of the day? Picture the following: you are in your usual state of mind and your phone rings. You are told that you won a million dollars. You are instantly excited, nervous, start to do the happy dance etc.. Amazing right? Can you see how altered your state of consciousness in an instant? Yes, there was a change in the environment but you did the changing internally. That is how you change your state. You can practice this through visualizations, meditation, mind practice anything that let's you fully experience a shift in your state. You have to be in that state. So in reality it becomes a state of being. It is in this state that you get to create. You get to practice being in a state that is actually something you desire. Let's say you want to lose 5 lbs. You have to become that weight in your mind. If and only if every negative thought that is an interference is removed will you actually... Support this podcast
www.kaiehnes.com Ep49 Say It Isn't So Hello and Welcome to the Way of the Emotional Warrior Podcast. My name is Kai Ehnes and today we will be answering the question of: Do most people really Not want to be Happy? When I first saw this, I thought I simply read too fast and made a mistake. After double checking, the statement really said People Do Not want to be happy…well time to take a deeper look. On a podcast episode by economist Tyler Cowen, he interviewed the 2002 Nobel Prize winner in economics, Cognitive Psychologist Daniel Kahneman. He contends that happiness and satisfaction are uniquely different. Happiness is a momentary experience that comes about impromptu and is temporary. Meanwhile, satisfaction lasts longer rooted in achieving goals and building the life you are proud of. Ok…I can see that. In either case these are feelings or emotions. If we pursue everyday, the feel-good or happy emotions then that will set a certain set of priorities into motion. Maybe you skip work and go and do some things that feel good in that moment. Maybe you simply go shopping online because it allows you to temporarily feel good because of mundane repetition in a job that pays the bills. In either case, what you find is that the happiness you thought was yours, disappears as fast as it came. Now you have to go back to your baseline. This means that you sort of live a drab non stimulating life unless you inject moments of happiness. Wow…was Kierkegaard right? According to Kahneman, “Altogether, I don't think that people maximize happiness in that sense…this doesn't seem to be what people want to do. They actually want to maximize their satisfaction with themselves and with their lives. And that leads in completely different directions than the maximization of happiness.” Instead, he argues that satisfaction is based mostly on comparisons. “Life satisfaction is connected to a large degree to social yardsticks–achieving goals, meeting expectations.” What about money? “He says it has a significant influence on life satisfaction, whereas happiness is affected by money only when funds are lacking. The lack creates suffering, but once you have above a certain income level that satisfies our basic needs, wealth doesn't increase happiness. The graph is surprisingly flat” Kahneman adds that memory is important in this process. Happiness is elusive because a lot of it simply never gets registered in long term memory. Have you ever experienced a great moment and wish you could somehow preserve it? Maybe you run to get your camera but by the time you get it, the moment is over. Maybe it simply can not be captured by the camera the way your consciousness does. Satisfaction on the other hand is the ongoing story of our lives. We add pieces to the story ongoing. We tell our story to ourselves and others throughout our entire life. Of course we tell the story quite often to elicit some sort of response. How often do you tell about an event in order to get sympathy? Do you notice that you slightly tell the story a different way to get noticed? So when do we feel this elusive happiness? We feel happiness primarily in the company of others, Kahneman argues. So back to that wonderful moment you were experiencing. If no one else is around simply enjoy how special it is. Don't do anything other than absorb it, soak it in, enjoy it. Then if you want, you can tell someone about it. Both moments will let you feel happy. Enough happy moments will let you build a life that works for you and now your life's story adds experiences of satisfaction. You will become way more fun to be around which means better interactions with others which leads to more life satisfaction. Good luck with your journey. ~Peace Support this podcast
www.kaiehnes.com Ep48 Let Go My Ego Hello and Welcome to the Way of the Emotional Warrior Podcast. My name is Kai Ehnes and today we will be answering the question of: Are you doing things in your life because of Ego? Have you ever found yourself in a situation where you had a plan. You thought it through and it not only makes sense but is aligned for you in all areas of your life. You are fully ready to proceed. Maybe you even get started. Let's assume for a second that you have already worked your way through the “doubts” phase where you had to truly muster all of your power to fight your way through the self doubt and external criticism from others. As if that wasn't difficult enough you get something coming out of nowhere. Maybe its an offer or simply an opportunity that seems and sounds absolutely incredible. Its as if someone studied your personality and tailor fit an invitation for you. Now you are tempted or might I even say hooked. The new situation reels you in like a fish on a hook. You simply can't help yourself, it seems oh so right and now all your energies get hijacked and you are off to doing something very different than th plan and track you were on just recently. So, you deep dive into the new adventure. Your ego or self feels so good. Maybe it's a certain title that would make you feel like you are better than before. Maybe its more money or some sort of materialistic treasure. You can paint your own version of this. The problem is that your ego got the best of the entire you. Now you get dragged in all kinds of directions and said and done, you are back to where you were before you found yourself and made your own great plan. In the brain, the feel good centers get activated and you feel so good that you almost become entranced. The neuroscience on this is varied. Some claim there is a self that is not so much a thing but moreso a process. Others say that the entire idea of self is simply not real. For example: Jerome Kagan, Ph.D., professor emeritus of psychology at Harvard says, "Ego doesn't exist in the brain," What does exist, he explains, is a brain circuit that controls the intrusiveness of feelings of self-doubt and anxiety, which can modulate self-confidence.” Antonio Damasio, an eminent neuroscientist, says in his book, Self Comes to Mind: Constructing the Conscious Brain: “The answers are unequivocal. There is indeed a self, but it is a process, not a thing, and the process is present at all times when we are presumed to be conscious. We can consider the self process from two vantage points. One is the vantage point of an observer appreciating a dynamic object … The other vantage point is that of the self as knower” Time to be an Emotional Warrior. Was your original plan heart based and created by you? Let's go with yes. Was your plan about happiness, growth and fulfillment? Yes. Did you work through the process of taking the ego out of the question which is why your plan was true and authentic for you? Yes. Were you happy doing what you were doing? Yes. The list probably goes on and on. So if there are all these yes answers, how did you get hijacked so easily by something that approached your ego? The ego, may not exist as a thing but it is linked to our survival brain. Time to transcend and live like a warrior that knows how to be present and move their energy forward becoming a creator of their own future. Until you get comfortable with the process, ask yourself a lot whether something is ego or authentically you. As time passes you will become stronger in your stance and become that heart based and resilient Emotional Warrior. Good luck. Support this podcast
Tiffany Ehnes has written a wonderful book about the beauty of the "I AM" It is entitled: I am Soulshine https://www.etsy.com/listing/622510746/inspirational-book-with-motivational?ref=shop_home_active_12&pro=1 www.kaiehnes.com info@kaiehnes.com Ep47 Who Am I…I Am Hello and Welcome to the Way of the Emotional Warrior Podcast. My name is Kai Ehnes and today we will be answering the question of: How can I know who I am? There two states we find ourselves in. The doubting state is when we ask Who am I? It is a state of discovery, questioning, wanting to expand and explore. It is an expanding state of consciousness and being. It certainly makes sense that when we challenge ourselves that we have to get out of the circle and rhythm of what we know. So we stop, it may be out of boredom or actual curiosity but we stop and send out a beckoning to call to the universe, please tell me or help me figure out who I am. Of course now comes the issue of the answer that we get. It becomes clear what the answer is when you find yourself being able to say “I am” this, that, or the other. The answer will be a resounding spiritual awareness of a new part of yourself. It is spiritual and not material. Take the statement I am rich. This is less about material wealth as much as it is about spiritual wealth. There will be an energy that is a part of this resounding “I am” which is the emotional component. Think of it as boost in energy. This new energy is the new vibrational level you get to experience. This boost in energy is what is needed for you to live your new life. Consider how amazing it is that we have this built in system. Many people live very repetitive lives of repetition and become staunch defenders of the status quo. For those of us who like growth and expansion, we find ourselves with a built in mechanism that allows us to send the energetic question of Who am I and are guaranteed an answer that can help us to make conscious our true purpose for being here. This is a very large part of the human experience, to not only find our purpose but to manifest our participation into this world. Of course, with some time, a new twist or even altogether new purpose will emerge, but we can only work through so much at any given time. So how do we know that the answer has come our way? It requires you to be aware. There is constant communication between the spirit plane and you. Just quiet down a bit. Maybe put down all the electronics and just observe. Like a lightbulb, all of the sudden your awareness will switch on. Once you notice it, you will find that it becomes part of who you are. Now, can you see that you have a new version of the “I am…” We learn in state of neutrality. When you asl the question, Who am I/ you enter this neutrality. You have left the victim mindset and want to move forward. It is guaranteed by spiritual law that you will be answered. The only thing left is to open yourself up to receive the input. Emotional Warriors understand this. They do not spend a long amount of time in darkness because that is not where they learn. They aim for neutrality so that they can work on their new level of consciousness. Its really not about controlling emotions but rather to use the energy to enlighten the heart and mind. If you want a tool to help to facilitate this, do the breathing for heart mind coherence. With your grid in coherence you will adjust your system to notice the answers you are seeking. I wish you the best with this process. It is truly wonderful to be able to know and shout the answer to your personal Who am I? Good luck. ~Peace Support this podcast
www.kaiehnes.com Ep46 Frontier Pragmatism Hello and Welcome to the Way of the Emotional Warrior Podcast. My name is Kai Ehnes and today we will be answering the question of: Is it worth being a Frontier Pragmatist? Pragmatic…Probably a term you have heard of at some point. There is quite a bit of debate over what it ultimately means but I think one way to look at pragmatism is as being practical, in the here and now. One explanation is that words and thoughts are not in themselves an exact version of reality. That means that words and thoughts moreso are a tool to be used to get something done. Let's try an example. You do something the best that you can. Someone you respect tells you that you did a “good Job.” On one hand this could mean that there is a clear cut definition and standard of what a good job is. Of your performance matched or exceeded that then you actually did a “good job. Pragmatists would use the word for several purposes. Of course it would mean that your performance was acceptable. But it also probably means that the person who is evaluating your performance wants to support you and entice you to improve. So, the idea of “good job” means, you did well, and you can find some places to improve and there fore carries an emotional intention that serves expediency in the moment. I realize that this is wordy but let me transition to the Way of the Emotional Warrior. A Frontier Pragmatist is someone who sees the world as it is and not how they want it to be. Its about getting something done now. It gets forward moving action and energy flowing. The other side to this idea is living in the world of ideals. Don't misunderstand this subtle point here. There is great merit to idealism, there is beauty in the pure ideals of something absolute. The difficulty is that it can lead to stuck or stalled out energy. Example: How can you really know that you have found absolute truth? The search may never end. However, it doesn't help to give up. Idealism is a wonderful part of how you view the world. The Frontier Pragmatist thinks in the Now. The added term of Frontier to Pragmatist leads to the idea of self-reliance. The great U.S. Supreme Court Justice, Oliver Wendell Holmes embraced this thinking in his view of Common Law decisions. Holmes meant it as the name for everything that arises out of the interaction of the human organism with the environment: beliefs, sentiments, customs, values, prejudices--what he called "the felt necessities of the time." If a law is so absolute that it does not serve the decency of the community then what good is it? Think of common sense. For the best of the community. One of the Emotional Warrior pillars is neuroscience and this case it not so much about the workings of the brain but moreso the prospects of a neuroscientifically-informed pragmatism and a pragmatically-informed neuroscience on issues ranging from the nature of mental life to the implications of neuroscience for education and ethics. How does this help us as Emotional Warriors? As we uplevel our emotional vibration we have to consider that we will need to reevaluate the ethics and education that are necessary for human interaction on those new levels. Think of this way, there is the letter of the law and then there is the spirit of the law. Frontier Pragmatists operate on behalf of the spirit of the community and the environment we all live in. It's a combination of both sides. Emotional Warriors become Cutting Edge Pragmatists. They use their ideals to set the direction of their life compass and then live their day to day seeing their world the way it actually is in order to get things done in the Now. To me this means that we have to think and live sustainably. Guiding principles include: balance, perspective and fairness. We work together to exist the best way we can with each other and within the laws of the world we live in. Are there any tools we can glean from this topic? We can... Support this podcast
www.kaiehnes.com Ep45 Generativity…Really? Hello and Welcome to the Way of the Emotional Warrior Podcast. My name is Kai Ehnes and today we will be answering the question of: What is Generativity and How can it help us? So…Generativity means that a person has concern for and belief in the future. People with a high degree of generativity have reached a point in their lives where they take on actions, behaviors, mindset which promotes goals and direction towards a better future. The person has an appreciation for possibility. Looking for and implementing positive stepping stones for a bigger and better future for themselves, others, mankind, animals, plants, the planet. No matter how bad things may be at any given moment, you can persevere and redeem yourself. Highly generative people are driven to help others for the betterment of the future. They might choose professions where this type of behavior is natural, healthcare, education, protectors of peace. Or, they are people who simply implement those behaviors into any job or situation they may be in. These people see their lives as redemption stories. Its not necessarily about personal redemption but realizing that as a whole the future can always be made better. Their lives become the hero's journey, as Joseph Campbell said. In psychology, Erik Erikson's model of psychosocial development, established the idea of generativity as being the polarity of middle age. Generativity or doing positive things for a better future is opposed by stagnation which means what it says, doing nothing and simply marking time. A healthy outcome of this is to do what one can to ensure a better future. Some people are highly generative while others might be slightly generative, in either case, the person is still generative which means forward positive moving energy. The difficulty with generativity is when the individual runs into barriers that don't allow for betterment. For example a person puts a ton of effort and time into a community project that simply does not manifest. Should that person give up? Of course not. Each day is a new day and maybe its simply a matter of course correction as to where to put their time and effort. Let's take a look at the neuroscience. On a simple level, the story goes like this. When you do something kind, or positive, the brain in response to that action secretes neurotransmitters that make you feel good. They can make you feel happy and satisfied. The regeneration or renewal pattern is that because it made you feel good you end up wanting more of those feelings so you do more generative behaviors and actions and slowly your baseline outlook rises and you feel overall better about things. You create a more positive outlook for your own future and of course for others. Time to apply this to the Emotional Warrior. Heart based resilience means that not only is the brain between your ears but your second brain, which is in the heart, becomes more activated and engaged. Practicing heart based breathing and gratitude, creating a personal philosophy of altruism and positivity set the tone for a beautiful life. There really is no need to convince anyone else of this for momentum to begin to rally. Simply work on yourself and your personality will inspire others to join you. It is truly a wonderful thing when you think about it. We spend our early years as part of our parents' world, then move into making a place for ourselves in society and the world and then we get to help out others. Our physical, emotional and spiritual systems are designed for this. We are meant to be altruistic and we are meant to improve life on this planet for future generations. This sounds like a phenomenal purpose to be a part of. ~Peace Support this podcast
www.kaiehnes.com Ep44 Select This…Attention Hello and Welcome to the Way of the Emotional Warrior Podcast. My name is Kai Ehnes and today we will be answering the question of: Can selective attention help us to find inner peace? In this episode I would like to take a closer look at how learning to ignore things can be the fastest way to achieve inner peace. In previous episodes I have tried to point out how removing interferences, sort of like peeling away the layers of an onion, allows to live a cleaner and healthier life. I do want to share some foundational assumptions about this path. By clean and healthy, what I mean is the way a human being can live a life on this earth. One that is sustainable, happy, giving, filled with gratitude and love. Removing interferences means to get rid of negative emotions, energies and frequencies that take up tremendous amounts of time to correct while in the meantime cause one to miss valuable quality of life experiences. I mean, we don't know how long we have to live and somehow due to experiences by those ahead of us and around us we believe to have on average around 80 years. So why, if you know this, are we so eager to give away any of our precious time? Why we do this, I would like to save for another conversation. Today, I would like to focus in on the idea of removing interferences , specifically by using something we possess quite naturally, called selective attention. How often have you looked at your phone while someone is trying to talk with you. You think you can pay attention to both but in the end the phone wins and you miss out on the immediate conversation. The phone wins because of something called visual capture. Visione is such a dominant sense that it takes over as the top priority while hearing/listenting takes a back seat. So what is selective attention? According to John Spacey, there are 9 types of selective attention: selective auditory processing, selective listening, selective visual attention, covert attention, automaticity, divided attention, sensory distraction, situational awareness, sensory overload. All of these are examples of selective attention which is the human ability to filter sensory information to focus attention. The neuroscience: in an article by Harold Schupp in the Journal of Neuroscience, his team found that negative stimuli ie: mutilation had the added emotional component added to attention. Showing that how incoming information is encoded and processed in the brain is not only based on emotion but amplified by the concurrent emotional experience. As I have said in prior episodes, our brain spends the bulk of its efforts keeping us alive, meaning survival based activity. The neuroscience shows that we pay attention to that which is negative or harmful quicker and amplify that experience with emotions if we think our survival is threatened. Now, the emotional warrior…how can use this information? Selective attention can help us to filter out negative stimuli. Since we already have the power of selective attention, lets use it four our own gain. Pay attention to what matters to your own personal growth and fulfilment. Much of the work and emotional warrior has to do is priming of thought. We have to take charge of our thinking. Of course bad things can and often do happen every day. But with the small steps philosophy of kaizen, you can choose the context for your thoughts. Ex: You wake up and before anything comes into your mind, actively or selectively do a mental gratitude list of your life. Such as: I am happy and grateful for my life, my health, the love of my life, my mindset, the abundance flowing my way etc… This sets into motion which thoughts of the millions around you get called into your awareness. Maybe you begin to notice small seemingly miraculous events and situations right in your immediate vicinity. No need to worry, the negative stuff is always right there, waiting, but it is your right and apparent hard... Support this podcast
www.kaiehnes.com Ep43 Do We Really Believe in Our Own Limitations Hello and Welcome to the Way of the Emotional Warrior Podcast. My name is Kai Ehnes and today we will be answering the question of: Do we really believe in our own limitations? How often do you find yourself having a great idea, at least it is one in your mind. The lightbulb goes off and you are convinced that you have found the answer that will fix some sort of major problem. But immediately, the loop of negativity begins to play. You hear the voices of all the nay-sayers, including your own. Oh there are so many obstacles that I have to conquer, so many steps, so many reasons to fail!! Crazy right? Why do we do this? Spirit, Source, God, whatever you want to call it, sends a great idea your way, only for your brain and ego to shoot it down before it can ever take hold and become something real. On one hand, we have the lizard brain or survival brain. Its job is to keep us safe. If you really let it do its best it will guide you to live in a tiny corner in a small room and even there be worried about surviving. Isn't it interesting that this is what we call survival? Absolute zero quality of life. So we have to take what this part of the brain tells us, evaluate the dangers, but in the end make more logical decisions. This means that we have to use our higher/reasoning part of the brain. While this may seems obvious, why don't we do it more naturally? The answer is habit. We think between 60 thousand to 70 thousand thoughts per day and 90-95% of those thoughts are the same, day in day out. The room for a novel thought in one's mind is quite slim. Is there anything we can do to help us with this? Enter the mindset of an emotional warrior. Emotional Warriors believe in possibilities. The repetitive mind lives within the confines of limitations. If every day is the same old same old, then novel ideas are almost Dangerous to us because they take us out of our routine. On one hand, there is nothing wrong with repetition of thoughts. One can master the steps in their lives, execute a task list and get a lot accomplished. However, where is the excitement, the jois de vivre? Mastering ones emotional life which is the basis of The Way of the Emotional Warrior means that there is a basic methodology involved. This basic system of thought or mindset has to be centered around happiness, fulfillment, success, contribution, love etc… Lets look at an example. You fill up your car with fuel. There is a standard for basic gasoline and most cars run well on that fuel. However, some cars require a higher grade fuel in order to run efficiently. Maybe, its worth looking at a vehicle that runs on a completely different fuel source? This is thinking in possibilities. If you put the same information into your consciousness every day then that will become a habit and your life will reflect only those thoughts. If you truly want something better and uplevel your life you have to break out of the routine. Yes, this requires some effort but the benefits are tremendous. A great place to start is to simply substitute one or a few emotions for higher level ones. Using the small steps philosophy of kaizen try driving to work with an audiobook or podcast playing instead of music. Maybe your commute that normally aggravates you and is a source of frustration and anger can become a more serene space because you enjoy listening to the content. Remember to drive safely
www.kaiehnes.com Ep42 Eternal Now Hello and Welcome to the Way of the Emotional Warrior Podcast. My name is Kai Ehnes and today we will be answering the question of: Is there really any other time than now? I recently came across an interesting piece of research which talks about an emotion called “acedia.” It means being listless, low energy, anxious. The inception of the term was describing what monks have to process through as they enter their monastic life. Much of their time is spent in isolation and the proverbial walls of their cloister cells tend to cave in on them. What really stuck out was the line, a mind seized by this emotion leaves the person unable to stay still and unable to devote any time to what one actually wants to do. In our house we call it antsiness. Of course you like your place and those close to you but all you want to do is break out. In terms of our pandemic lockdown situation, I think it really challenged our ability to spend time with ourselves. There are many reasons why this has been difficult but among some of the highest is much of our pre Covid lifestyle revolved around a bombardment of information and frenzy of energy to match it. What we call busy lives may be more along the lines of doing so many things and many of them at the same time that there is no time for being at peace by ourselves. One of the main goals of an emotional warrior is gaining internal peace. Often it is called being at peace. Apparently this harder than most people think. The moment TV, phone and computer/internet energies cease one simply does not know what to do. There are online courses on how to detox from some of this incoming energy...irony. However, there is validity to the idea that humans need to spend some time just Being, being at peace in their environment. Emotional Warriors know to insert this into their lives. It could be as simple as scheduling time to do so. Maybe Friday starting at 5pm all electronics shut down for 1 hour and then slowly build up to 24 hours. With enough practice a healthy balance will emerge. This brings us to the main topic of this episode…the Eternal Now. This is often referred to in philosophy and literature. The eternal now is at the end of the day the only reality we can be in. The past has happened, it can not be changed and too many people wallow in it either for longing or regret. The future is great but can on happen down the road. There is the ever present Now one has to move through to get there. That is why I spoke earlier about all the distractions. Too many distractions simply do not allow for living in the Now. All news is the past. It already happened. Of course it is important to be up to date on worldly events but constant news updates do not allow for being in the Now. Why is the Now so important? Consider the idea that we only can live and make decisions in the Now. An emotional warrior seeks freedom. In other words its all about emotional freedom. It makes sense that emotional freedom happens in the domain of the Now. Making choices in the Now about the Now and for the Now means that you are present. Of course you have to set goals. That is a separate topic. For now, lets clarify the point. Acedia is a type of restlessness that leads to emotional energy running amuck. There is no emotional direction or focus. How can you make choices that help you increase the quality of your emotional, spiritual and physical life when you are simply reaction to incoming energy that is in a frenzy. The point is to settle down your energy. Once you settle down you can spend more time being present and living in the Now. You will be happier because you can actually concentrate on yourself and clean up your interior world. This will let you be a better person not only for yourself but those close to you and your community. The eternal now is our plane of reality. It is where we live and operate as human beings. This leads to being emotionally... Support this podcast
www.kaiehnes.com Ep41 How to Get Out of a Funk Hello and Welcome to the Way of the Emotional Warrior Podcast. My name is Kai Ehnes and today we will be answering the question of: When my mood is less than optimal, how can I get out of my emotional funk? Doing some cursory research for this episode, I found that there are quite a few websites that will tell you 10 to 45 tips on how to maintain your mood. On the heavy hitter list are strategies such as a mood journal, proper diet and exercise, and interactions with nature. I thought that it might be a good idea before we get into any strategies, to actually take a look at why we have mood swings. Of course there are triggers. Maybe someone slighted you or you simply are at odds with the current state of affairs, locally to globally. But aren't there times when none of that changes and you find yourself feeling okay, dare I say good? On some level, I think that it has become normal to be below a 5 on scale of 1 to 10. Somehow the grumbling and complaining has become the norm. In a way I am sure it is about attention. To some degree it is about fitting in. For example, you find yourself in a group that you have to attend, ie a group at a job, and after 2 hellos it becomes a complaint fest. As if any of the participants are even in a position to change anything. So, when in Rome, right? What do you do? You add to the list of complaints, everyone is happy that you too are miserable. If you step back a second, how much of your life is dictated by the low vibration of others. You don't want to make any waves etc… Since most people extend their work relationships into their friendships, you can see where this goes…nowhere empowering, that's for sure. We have many reasons for doing all this but with enough time, it becomes normal. According to neuroscience, Dr. Joe Dispenza, states that by the age of 35 your dominant personality and outlook on life are in place. Your subconscious takes on that particular mindset. Are you stuck in this repetitious cycle? Why, you may ask.. It has to do with 2 natural laws which are the law of rhythm and the law of polarity. Polarity means “poles” or bookends of a continuum. Think of good and evil, up and down, light and dark etc… The reason for opposites is simple. There can only be expansion if something is thrown out of kilter so that something new can emerge. That new something can be an improvement. For people, we fluctuate between constancy and variety. We seek comfort through constancy but immediately want something different for variety. This allows us to gain perspective and grow. The law of rhythm is what drives the experience of polarity. Think of it this way: Rhythm is movement and the direction is somewhere between the polar opposites. Why does this matter? An emotional warrior can learn to use this to live a better quality of life. In your life dimensions, health, relationships, finances etc…what if you could predict where on the continuum you are? Just like there are seasons of the year, think about the seasons for every aspect of your life. Certain foods grow better in spring and summer and not so much in the fall and winter. What if you aligned your life with these rhythms? Investments have cycles, your budget has cycles, your relationships have cycles. An emotional warrior can be ready for these cycles and better yet, know the parts of the cycle and live accordingly. Ex: winter is a great time to work out because there is less outdoor activity, in the summer your system naturally functions longer throughout the day and has more energy to do so. Money has cycles. There are times where it makes sense to save and then there will be the right opportunity to spend that saved wealth and seize an excellent opportunity of value. The key with all this is quite simple. There is no need to stay in a negative environment and mindset. Find your own groove. Learn to identify the polarities and... Support this podcast
www,kaiehnes.com Ep40 Resilience Hello and Welcome to the Way of the Emotional Warrior Podcast. My name is Kai Ehnes and today we will be answering the question of: How can I be resilient? Resilience…seems like an obvious concept right? So what does it mean to be resilient? Its really about knowing where you are on the continuum of your own actions. Are you reactive? Do you find that life happens to you? How can you tell if this is you? You find yourself having to constantly fix something. This could be something tangible like a car battery to your relationships, to your health. Things happen and you have to deal with them, usually from a place of being under or a victim. Jumping to the other side of the continuum…you try to preempt and control everything. In order to not be in the position of being under, you take the “bull by the horns” and go all out in terms of trying to control everything. The reason is that if you control it then you can determine what happens and how they will impact you. The issue with both of these extremes is that they simply do not work exclusively. If you are a controller, how has that been going? How much anxiety do you have? How often does all of your controlling simply leave you at odds with events because even with all of your manipulation, things don't work out according to the plan? There is a tremendous amount of frustration with this approach. It might feel like you are always fighting with people and the world. So, not caring leaves you a victim and caring too much leaves you ill and frustrated. Is there a middle ground? This is the Way of the Emotional Warrior. It really starts with working on yourself. How can you get right and solid? It begins with Heart-Based Resilience. This means that you set your life up to function from your heart vs your head. You absolutely have to take the time to center and activate your heart. This means you have to start with taking some time for yourself. Start with 15 minutes a day. What should you do in these 15 minutes? You place your hand on your chest by your heart. Breathe deeply, in and out. Try to count to 5 in each direction. Next, keep a journal and set yourself some heart based resilience goals. The middle of the road means that you know the extremes and find a space in between where you feel you can live sustainably. You are Right with the ebb and flow of life. Each day you find something to work on, set it into your mindset by bringing it to yourself by way of the heart. Why no the mind you might be asking. Well, the mind is obviously included but remember the brain's job is survival programming. The extremes mentioned earlier are the result of brain thinking vs heart thinking. Brain formulates strategies for survival, reaction or preemptive control. The heart seeks unification, sustainable living. What does any of this matter? I would think it has to do with living, more particularly, living a good life. This might seem pie in the sky but the extremes around this lead to strife and dysfunction. What can you work on in terms of resilience? 1. Resilience means that you can identify the actual issue and 2. That you can adapt to deal with the issue. So the idea is this: Let's work on 3 things. Your health, your relationships and your finances. Of course each one is super important but just for a cursory look, here we go. Your health…heart-based resilience means that you value your life, not just once a year but at all times. You don't live in fear. You work on your diet, your exercise, your mental well being. Address each area by creating solutions. Maybe you elevate your diet. How to start? Maybe its just by eliminating some unhealthy choices. Your relationships: You most likely have a good list of what someone else should be like. Depending on your age you have had experiences that leave you seeing how others don't measure up. Heart based reliance would be that you set aside finding something for a bit... Support this podcast
www.kaiehnes.com Ep39 Your Best Life Hello and Welcome to the Way of the Emotional Warrior Podcast. My name is Kai Ehnes and today we will be answering the question of: Have you lived your best life? At times I have had the opportunity to sit across from someone who relaxes a bit and allows some of their truth to come out. More than once has the following happened. The other person starts to reminisce about their past by bringing up their moments of triumph. That in itself is not the reveal, it actually happens when they continue to talk about their past and then…wait for it…they flat out tell you that those were the best days of their lives. For ex: back when I was in my twenties, well, let me tell you, the things that I did..those were the days… Spooling forward to the present, you can see their energy drop. Their life choices have gotten them to a place where they never imagined themselves to be. I am not saying they don't like their current lives, they simply seem to feel that their BEST days have already gone by and when they get nostalgic they can't help but enter a feeling of regret and longing for a better time in their lives. One example of this is shown in a song by the musician Eric Church. Young and wild like they said we should've never been And still a child filling those nights with grown up sin I burned up some cars, burned down some hearts Just to call myself a man I might not do it the same but I'd do it all again To stay young and wild as long as you can He sets the mood in the song that those were the best days. Another example comes from the all time great, Bruce Springsteen, in his song: Glory Days. He says: There's this girl that lives up the block, back in school she could turn all the boys heads Sometimes on Friday i'll stop by and have a few drinks after she put her kids to bed Her and her husband bobby, well they split up, i guess it's two years gone by We just sit around talking about the old times, she says when she feels like crying she starts laughing thinking about Glory days... Think i'm going down to the well tonight and i'm gonna drink till i get my fill I hope when i get older i don't sit around thinking about it, but i probably will Yeah just sitting back trying to recapture a little of the glory of Well the time slips away and leaves you with nothing, mister, but boring stories of Glory days... The reason I wanted to do this episode is that an Emotional Warrior focuses more on forward moving energy. Of course there is nothing wrong with looking back upon your life. Its your life, after all. However, the part that one needs to be careful about is that when the past becomes the best part of your life then you end up living a life that is about marking time to the point where you die. Glory days exist. There have been phenomenal moments in all of our lives. They can be great memories just don't let them become energy traps. One of the best parts about growing older and wiser in life is the accumulation of knowledge and understanding which lets you become more creative and interactive with the life you lead and interactions with those around you. An Emotional Warrior is about living with Heart based Coherence and resilience. We know that the one constant in the universe is change. It happens all the time. Often change is not easy for people. Awareness of the changes and subsequent rhythms governed by the law of rhythm and the law of polarity let you become more attuned on how to weave and navigate the waters of the future. The neuroscience of resilience is fascinating. The bulk of our brain, 90+% is dedicated to our survival. It is mostly subconscious programming, to survive. What if you can use that programming to your advantage? What if your Glory Days, your ability to be Wild can be accessed every day? What if it is not about being crazy and doing outrageous things but instead expanding your interior awareness and Support this podcast
www.kaiehnes.com Ep38 Living…Normal Hello and Welcome to the Way of the Emotional Warrior Podcast. My name is Kai Ehnes and today we will be answering the question of: How can one live this thing called normal? So the main issue we need to look at is the notion of what is normal? You hear this all the time. Normal this or hey, that's not normal. Somewhere out there I think most people believe that there is a normal or point of reference. Then it is believed that the closer you are to it the more normal or right you are in your thoughts and actions. If this were really all so simple why is normal such an elusive mistress? When I was little I never fully understood what this normal life actually was. Think about it, we are born, not really by choice, (well…mostly) into a family we didn't have a choice over, (mostly) and into a time and place outside of our control. Talk about not having a center. On top of being cast into a life without an operator's manual, we are supposed to act normal, when essentially few people can agree on what that actually is or means? Let's look a bit deeper into normal. The Cambridge definition says that normal is ordinary or usual, the same as would be expected. So we can already see that normal is pretty bland, the same old same old. Sure it is consistent and that is good for a while but it will pretty quickly get challenged by novelty and variety. To me normal would be good as a point of reference but not really of value to living an authentic vivacious, dynamic life. One way to look at normal is through the lens of neuroscience. The term in this field for normal is homeostasis. This helps animals maintain stable internal and external environments with the best conditions for it to operate. So if we use normal and homeostasis interchangeably you can see that it is no longer bland. Homeostatic balance means that you can have your own being interact with the world around you in the best overall fashion. This is what I would call a sustainable state of being. IS there more? According to Donald Riggles, our brains process a staggering 11 million bits of information per second, of that 50 bits per second are conscious. Neuroscience shows that survival and pleasure reactions are the main task of our unconscious mind and are directly involved with our health and well being. Consider this for a second. Our health and well being are being handled by our unconscious mind and mainly work on our interaction with pleasure and pain. There is a secretion of adrenaline, dopamine and oxytocin, all which maintain our balanced state. These bookends or guardrails keep us in check and balanced. So…tieing this together, Our brains are hard wired to consistently bring us back into a state of balance which means that we have an internal sense of normal. We know what normal is at all times. However, with our lifestyles, we spend a lot of time and effort on being out of balance, consider diet and exercise. So if we know what normal is internally and by design, why do we have such a hard time with it? Let's look at this from the perspective of an Emotional Warrior. What is clear from this viewpoint is that the heart controls the show. Resilience and love are the tools for emotional balance and vibrational consciousness. This means that the Emotional Warrior spends their time actualizing their natural, authentic, normal state and then navigates their external world to find places and activities where that normalcy can be lived. Simply put, an Emotional Warrior lives an authentic heart based life on the inside and the outside. Confusion and chaos begin to fade away allowing for growth, fulfilment and actualization. Consider how wonderful this lived life is and can be. In the next episode we look at life within these guardrails. I look forward to seeing you there. Support this podcast
www.kaiehnes.com Ep37 Rock Back and Gain Perspective Hello and Welcome to the Way of the Emotional Warrior Podcast. My name is Kai Ehnes and today we will be answering the question of: Why am I not moving forward? Do you ever notice that you are simply not moving forward in your life? It always really frustrated me to feel like I was stuck. To be fair nothing was really wrong, it just felt like there was no forward movement or momentum. Generally, I have the type of personality that likes for things to move forward. Sure, I don't like or want things to be out of control…I mean who does? However, within the guardrails of a “Good Life” I certainly appreciate forward movement. What do I mean by forward movement? I view it as a type of improvement. One of the theories that I advocate weekly is called kaizen. It is a Japanese Business philosophy that translates to continuous improvement. I think it is super rewarding and gratifying to improve yourself. This is not based on competition but rather an intrinsic exploration and actualization of yourself. For example, one can work on their negative emotions. The ones that are below the vibrational level of 200. They do not serve your growth. They bring your energy and vibration down and now it becomes increasing more difficult to improve oneself. So, aim for the emotions above the 200 level. They are: Courage at 200 Neutrality at 250 Willingness at 310 Acceptance at 350 Reason at 400 Love at 500 Joy at 540 Peace at 600 Enlightenment at 700 to 1000 Just looking at this list feels good. Just let possibility enter your mindset. So, those kaizen small steps of continuous improvement can help you expand your way of thinking and interacting with the world. The only comparison you should worry about is yourself and even that is unnecessary. When you live in a state of Flow, doing what you like, there is nothing to compare to. You are doing your “thing” the way you want to do it. In that state you are vibrating at least at 500. That has built into it a momentum that keeps everything moving forward. So, you can see that you are already Not Stuck. I heard the following: Before you move forward, maybe you need to take a step back and gather some perspective. In that case, not moving forward is by design, a way for you consider if you are moving forward in the right direction or if you need to change course. What about the Neuroscience? According to neuroscientist, David Eagleman – not only does adventuring make you interesting, you know the type of person people are drawn to, but it also makes your smarter, even more productive at work (!!!!) and more attractive to the opposite sex.” In a psychological study conducted at Indiana University it was found that by merely imagining we're on an adventure, we improve our creativity and self-awareness. So when you step back or rock back and allow for a new perspective to emerge think adventure. Doing something really cool. That will awaken your creativity and self awareness. Imagine the possibilities. Emotional Warriors not only know about this but practice this quite regularly. This rocking back to get a new and different perspective is a wonderful skill to add to your emotional toolbag. The expanse of possibilities can be scary but if you know that you can practice a technique of higher vibration to channel your forward moving energy into becoming an asset for your own adventure. Peace End: I hope you enjoyed this episode and I will see you next time around…take care. Support this podcast
www.kaiehnes.com Ep36 Micro or Macro Optimist Hello and Welcome to the Way of the Emotional Warrior Podcast. My name is Kai Ehnes and today we will be answering the question of: Are you a Micro or Macro Optimist? Lets start with what is an optimist? An optimist is someone who has a hopeful outlook and typically expects good outcomes. For example: in the US, 42 to 45% of first marriages end in divorce and 60% of second marriages divorce. So, roughly ½ of marriages end in divorce. Yet: and here comes the kicker…Newlyweds believe that their marriage will survive. So, when people get married they do not believe that their marriage will end in divorce. That translates to an anticipated zero % divorce rate. So, why marriages end in divorce is a different topic but that ½ fail while no one believes it will be theirs is our topic of investigation. Neuroscience has some very interesting research that basically shows how we are hard wired to be optimistic. We will get to that in a second. First, I want to explore my title of micro and macro optimism. The idea is this. A person can be quite optimistic bout the long term, like: Of course everything will be alright once everything settled down. Or, certainly I am mostly happy. However, how optimistic are people in the short term? You might think that you are optimistic in the overall but day to day you look at various life situations only to discover that you simply don't like most of what you do each and every day. So micro optimistic is that in the immediate, you find yourself very frustrated. Everything is slow, not really satisfying, not allowing you to be happy. But, on a macro level when someone speaks with you, there is an overall hopefulness and belief that everything will turn out alrght. To me this is quite strange. How can so many small non optimistic experiences still allow for a long term positive outlook? Let's create a plan on how to use this all to our advantage. 1. Always a good frame of reference is neuroscience. An expert in this field is Tali Sharot. Her work as a professor of cognitive neuroscience at University College London focuses on the crossroads of how emotions and memory play on our perceptions and behaviors. One of her favorite ideas in this field is the so-called optimism bias; the tendency of humans to be biased towards positive thinking. Worries and woe might seem like fundamental cornerstones of the human condition, but it appears that we tend to perceive our personal future with staunch optimism, even at the risk of being irrational. In that sense, Tali bluntly notes: “People are not driven by facts, they are driven by emotion” her studies showed that brain activity clearly shows a pattern of shushing negative foresight, yet livening up at the thought of positive visions. When processing thoughts about our own future, the brain effectively has a ‘good vibes only' policy. - Check – our brains have the predilection to push us towards optimism and positivity 2. Since we perfectly align with Macro-optimism to the neuroscience findings, we are also already good to go in this area. 3. What's left is the micro-optimism. How can we shift our emotions and thoughts to not get locked up in negative self doubt spirals? Answer – we become Emotional Warriors. This means that you pull yourself together and set your intentions and then move towards manifesting them. You do this best through the small steps philosophy of kaizen. Kaizen means continuous improvement. So how can you improve your micro-optimism? Think about an area that is not filled with too much doubt. Don't immediately try to fix the worst offenders. So let's say you find something wrong with your body image. Maybe your nose, cheeks, arms, your butt…who knows, something along these lines bothers you. Try finding something that lets you be more positive about it. Let's say its Support this podcast
www.kaiehnes.com Ep35 Measure of your Heart Hello and Welcome to the Way of the Emotional Warrior Podcast. My name is Kai Ehnes and today we will be answering the question of: How would you govern your realm? What prompted me to want to do an episode on it was a segment of the new U.S President's Inauguration speech. The segment I want to point out is a great example how one lives in a realm of emotional warriors. He said: To all those who supported our campaign I am humbled by the faith you have placed in us. To all those who did not support us, let me say this: Hear me out as we move forward. Take a measure of me and my heart. And if you still disagree, so be it. That's democracy. That's America. The right to dissent peaceably, within the guardrails of our republic, is perhaps our nation's greatest strength.” In another January on New Year's Day in 1863 Abraham Lincoln signed the Emancipation Proclamation. When he put pen to paper the president said, and I quote, 'if my name ever goes down in history, it'll be for this act, and my whole soul is in it'. My whole soul is in it today, on this January day. My whole soul is in this. This just made me stop my wheels for a second. Did he really just talk about authentic heart and soul? I move forward, optimistically hopeful. This led me to the point of inviting you to a thought experiment. If you were given the chance to rule your own realm, what type of ruler would you be? How would you handle dissent? Who would you choose to surround yourself with? What would you prioritize in your kingdom? What rules or standards would you put in place for everyone to live by? What level of government intervention would you put into action? Do you believe that your citizens should be empowered, to a large degree, to rule their own lives? What is the direction and goal for your realm? If something or someone threatens your realm, does defeating them take precedence over the welfare of your people? What will be the standard of living for your people? If you went into this role wanting to be noble – how will you achieve it? What if the desires of your citizens develops into something different than what you had planned? Will you implement an education system? What will be your standard for an educated citizen entering into adult society? This are just some questions to get you started. The reason why I think this is an important activity is because it obviously applies to the world of man and societies and realms, another way to look at this is how you rule yourself. You are the prime ruler of your own internal domain, yet how little do we govern it? Think about the things you say to yourself The food you eat The care you take of your body The careful training you do of your mind The amount of heart and spirit you allow to accompany you in your life. So here it is full circle. If someone had to take measure of your heart…what would they find? Is your soul in it? You whole soul? Peace Support this podcast
www.kaiehnes.com Ep34 Miracles and The Soul Hello and Welcome to the Way of the Emotional Warrior Podcast. My name is Kai Ehnes and today we will be answering the question of: Soul baby, you've got to have soul. The Dalai Lama, the spiritual leader of Tibetan Buddhism says: “Being Born is a miracle, so what are you going to do with your Life? Picture that for a moment. Statistically and spiritually we are all miracles by being born. So, that makes your life your birthright. You were given this. Next, he asks what we are going do with this unfolding and uncovering of ourselves, called life. What are we going to do with it? Hm…this is super interesting when the context of yourself is that you are a miracle. The Miriam-Webster dictionary defines a miracle as an extraordinary event manifesting divine intervention in human affairs. Wow…according to this, our birth is such an extraordinary event that the divine is involved. I know babies are cute and amazing but add the notion that the baby is divine manifestation!!! Amazing. So, let's look at this through the eyes of the Emotional Warrior. We develop through the stages of early childhood, middle childhood, adolescence, young adulthood, middle adulthood and old age…which is an amazing life span. Next, we keep asking ourselves…why are we here? What are we supposed to do? Why do certain things and events happen to me? The questions about our existence are really never ending. However, what I would say regarding our emotions is that we have gifts that allow us to experience this world on multiple levels. Not only do have the gift of the physical life, we also have the ability to live special lives. Special lives you say?? Yes, grasshopper…special lives. Here is something I wrote on a cocktail napkin in 2004. Soul…at the moment of creation, the body, at conception, wraps around a piece of the whole, which I think is the soul. The soul stays dormant in the body until there is a spark, a spiritual epiphany. At that point the awareness of your relationship with the whole/all emerges. This is spiritual consciousness. It requires effort to stay conscious. Through ritual we reconnect and stay connected to the whole. I recently found this in a drawer and see in light of the miracle of being born in a whole new light. Our purpose is really quite simple. We are miracles and our job is to experience and live a miraculous life. To me, this makes for such a beautiful experience. Look at the moments in your life and see their miraculous value, their miraculous purpose just for you. This is super empowering. An Emotional Warrior can wear this wisdom as a second skin of sorts. Every day is really about living a miraculous life. Notice those special things. Empower yourself. This is what is in your ability to control. We have been so conditioned to open the floodgates for toxicity to enter into our system that it just seems natural and eventually becomes our reality. As it turns out though you can absolutely change your inside world. Start by double checking if what the toxic events coming your way are actually welcome guests in your life. If not, then start to develop techniques to keep them out. One such technique is to build up your own positivity and resilience. Remember kaizen steps of continuous improvement. One small step at a time. Your reality is your domain…therefore your experience of the miraculous is also your own. I did want to bring in some neuroscience. Nils J. Bergman discusses the neuroscience of birth – the case for zero separation. His main point is that newborns should be completely connected to the mother. He calls this zero separation. His article claims the following: Currently, Western maternal and neonatal care are to a large extent based on routine separation of mother and infant. There is no scientific rationale for this practice, instead, there is a case for Zero Separation of mother and newborn. For the infant, Support this podcast
www.kaiehnes.com Ep33 Leaders and Lovers Hello and Welcome to the Way of the Emotional Warrior Podcast. My name is Kai Ehnes and today we will be answering the question of: What do great leaders and lovers have in common? In our current times of upheaval, a question that came up for me is what is a good leader? What in the world would make me want to follow anyone in this world, especially someone who thinks they are a leader? The first person that came to mind who wrote a great book on the issue is Simon Sinek. His book, Leaders Eat Last: Why Some Teams Pull Together and Some Don't, lays out core principles of what makes a good leader especially because what they accomplish is to bring people together into teams that produce ideas and work greater than any one single person could. A few of the core principles he proposes are as follows: Real responsibility means caring about other people and allowing yourself to get attached. Leaders need to take the mental and physical well-being of their followers into account if they want those followers to work as best as they can. To be an effective leader, you'll need to learn to delegate and trust people to do their work effectively. If you've done your job as a teacher and inspirational manager well enough, your followers should do what they need to perfectly. Humans First, Numbers Second I agree with Sinek that leaders with these qualities make it easy to follow them. The ship is moving in the right direction with an effective captain at the helm. So…What does this have to do with lovers? Nothing…I just wanted a cool title…just kidding
www.kaiehnes.com Ep32 Transcending Fear Hello and Welcome to the Way of the Emotional Warrior Podcast. My name is Kai Ehnes and today we will be answering the question of: How do we transcend fear? Welcome to the New Year of 2021. Most of us love to create a new vision of what we want to become at the beginning of a new year. Resolutions, vision boards, new affirmations or mantras, getting into better shape, trying something new…all in all making some changes. Let's take a breath for a second. What an amazing amount of pressure we put on ourselves each New Year's day. We just made it through the holidays and family interactions, some good, some crazy. Now we want to totally reinvent ourselves? How successful have you been at this in the past? Sure, you probably declared new intentions and even started them but take a look how long or short these declarations last. Gym memberships skyrocket the first week of January and then decline sharply. Diets get started but if you are lucky you make it right to Valentine's Day when all the sugar treats get thrown in front of you. This goes on and on, year after year. It is the fodder for any late night comedian. So, why do your intentions simply not last? This is the work of an emotional warrior. You have to have some sort of leverage to be able to sustain the shift. So how do you get that leverage? What does this even mean? Leverage means that you have something in your life that you value more than whatever the activity holds that you wish to change. Let's say you want to work out because you think it will help you feel better. All fine and good until not working out simply feels better than working out. Duh…of course you are going to go work out…NOT. So, how do you find or get the proper leverage? For some people it will be a life threatening event. Maybe through a heart attack you find healthier food and being alive carries more value for you than eating charred meat. There are numerous examples but what I want to focus on here is the emotional component of leveraging yourself. What is it that makes us feel so good doing things that are not good for us? Its simple. We firmly believe that feeling good means that we are safe. We seek comfort because that is how we knew that we get to live. Think of the baby that is comforted in its mother's arms being held close and told that everything will be ok. Now that you are an adult consider the flaw in this though. Instead of eating healthier foods after the heart attack you get the sack of greasy food which is what you put you into danger in the first place. In his 2011 work, Stephen Porges, posits that in order to meet our need for socialization, a third subsystem in our brain developed called our “higher social brain” aka the “ventral vagal complex. Evolution transformed our brain to a more complex brainstem which activates when we see a smiling face, a relaxed face, hear a soothing voice, notice that others are calmly gesturing. He called these our social safety cues. This allows us to feel safe in the closeness of others. That is the neuroscience of our safety and comfort net. It obviously works and has served us. But there is more. We can transcend this. Why should we? Because we all have the right and ability to grow and become more. That is the point of our life. Authentic emotional warriors seek expansion in their lives. So can you and how do you conquer fear? According to Tim Ferris, conquering fear starts with defining fear. What about those people who are always optimistic? He says that often they are disguising their fear in their excessive optimism. In the world of Emotional Warriors we always seek balance, harmony and homeostasis. The best place to begin defining fear is take the worst case scenario version of what you are stuck in. Ex: Let's say you want to eat healthier. You stumble upon vegetables. OH my, I couldn't possibly stop eating meat. I need the iron and... Support this podcast
Ep31 Eustress…huh? Hello and Welcome to the Way of the Emotional Warrior Podcast. My name is Kai Ehnes and today we will be answering the question of: Is there such a thing as good stress? We have all heard of distress. Distress is what we mean when we usually talk about and hear about people being stressed or stressed out. Phrases like: work has me stressed out, the kids stress me out, everything is pressure, I'm so stressed I will explode. I am sure most everybody has experienced this to some extreme or another. So, what actually is this stress? It has to do with your autonomic nervous system. It starts with our system in a state of homeostasis. Everything is in balance. All of a sudden something that appears to be dangerous to our survival steps into our immediate proximity and our survival mechanism kicks in and our autonomic nervous system kicks in by secreting massive amounts of adrenalin and other chemicals that allow our body to escape what it perceives to be danger. Then our body looks for safety and gets us there. Whew…safe again to live and fight another day. Now we have our sympathetic nervous system jump in and bring our entire system back to balance…homeostasis. That is the normal path of our system. The key to that story is that homeostasis or balance is our normal state of being. However, in today's world that is not how we live. We activate and make our “survival” system turn on all the time. 24 hours a day we caffeinate, push, and strain our system to the point of where at times we can not do it any longer and the system breaks down. Then we go right back to doing it again. Our society rewards us for more hours worked, more time spent shuffling our kids around from one organized even to another, buying more material goods with the promise of rewards points. Then you realize you have to pay for it all which means more work and time being traded for money. This is known as the “rat race.” Stop for a second and consider this: are you a rat? Is there actually a race with anywhere to go? Did you actually sign up for this race? I know that this sounds like I am saying stop and run away from it all. But, that is not at all where I am going with this. First, there is amazing knowledge and power in the simple awareness that one is even involved in this race. Most people do it from a subconscious place and that means they simply do it like an automaton or sleepwalker. With the knowledge of being in the race, what can you do? Time to be an emotional warrior. Emotions are the energy underlying all thoughts. Thoughts drive our experience but emotions determine the outcome. Think about that for a second. Emotions determine the outcome…so then do you simply emote your way to freedom? Well, actually, yes but first you have to understand and master the fact that your freedom achieved by your thoughts. Thoughts are 5% while the emotions are 95%. Together they make up our experiences. Now, do you want your experiences to control you or do you want to create your life journey? That is where eustress comes into play. Eustress means positive stress. The prefix “eu” comes from Greek meaning health…so, healthy stress. What, there is healthy stress? Sure, think of getting up the energy to ask someone out, giving a speech or a performance. Its all about the good feelings in your gut that let you gather the courage to do something outside of your comfort zone. Breaking out into new experiences means entering the unknown, which of course means that there is the possibility of failure. This in turn means that a lot of noise is happening in your experience. Doubt and failure creep into everything you think about. This is where most people run back to what they think is safe. The irony is that what they think is safe is actually dangerous because it is a world filled with distress. So how can you have more eustress and less distress? The answer is being an emotional warrior. You set up your life,... Support this podcast
www.kaiehnes.com All of us would like to wish all of You Happy Holidays. A state of gratitude allows you to connect to your own heart and communicate authentically with others. We look forward to creating new episodes in the New Year. Be well. Peace Support this podcast
www.kaiehnes.com Ep29 Things a man oughta know Hello and Welcome to the Way of the Emotional Warrior Podcast. My name is Kai Ehnes and today we will be answering the question of Hey, are there really things a man oughta know? I thought we could talk about a song that I heard the other day. The title is “Things a man oughta know!” The performer is a woman which I think is an interesting perspective on what a man oughta know. When I was a kid you learned how to be a man from other men. Male role models were the conduit for this scared knowledge known as manhood. What is really interesting is that you don't necessarily get to choose these role models. They are assigned to you like your father, grandfather, uncle etc… I mean in my own case they were there but not what I found to be the men who truly “knew.” They were simply men. I was mostly raised by my mom, so without knowing it, I was introduced to the world through a female mindset and perspective. I know, I know…get to the part of what he oughta know…in a minute… Men see the world through the masculine lens. That does not mean macho in this context, it means manifest, obvious, of the world. Mystery is not the main driver of knowledge and awareness. For me, it meant the mainstream version of being a man. Get a job, provide for your family, a good life would be one where you do what most men do. Whatever that is. So isn't that what a man oughta know? Let's see what the song has to say: How to know when it's love How to stay when it's tough How to know you're messin' up a good thing And how to fix it 'fore it's too late If you really love a woman, you don't let her go How to chase forever down a driveway How to never let it get there in the first place This really peaked my curiosity. Did or Do I have any kind of clue? I thought I had a bit of a clue but really…do I? So, I decided to ask my wife. One might say, bad move dude, why would you open up that can of worms and poke the bees nest? In my search for truth…sometimes you go to the source and get amazing insight. She agreed with the list from the song. Check…I can work on that. Then she said, personally I would add the following. I want you to tell me its going to be okay, even if I'm crying or when you have no idea of a plan Thinking your woman is beautiful even when she doesn't feel that way Looking at her like she is a queen even when she feels like a scullery maid Remembering the good times and forgetting the faults Loving the woman she is now not the girl she used to be Hm…the list is getting longer. However…consider the moments each piece of the list lets you be part of. I never wanted to be a passenger in this life…boring…I wanted and want to be out front. That means you get the full experience..Like Jimmy Hendrix said: “Are you experienced” I have had the honor of experiencing everything on this list and with a person that is truly my better half. But, do I have anything to add. What about my list. Certainly, I agree with everything said so far. But I thought I would offer a bit of what I think as a man. I make sure that at least once day I see her. I heard it called, stopping the world. We stop the outside world and I look at her and see her for the beautiful soul she is I knew she was “The one” the moment we met. We were not even supposed to meet that day, it was a fluke, but it was clear. That was amazing…God/source saw to it that we would meet. While corny, she is the wind beneath my wings…since we met she inspires me every day to improve and step up my game and consciousness I have learned to reassure her that everything is okay. This is Trust. I believe that together it will be okay, even when I have no clue. When I hold her in my arms and she embraces me back, I feel that we are one. One heart beating together. I have learned to listen, actively listen, Listen between the lines. Relationships are a delicate dance and I am... Support this podcast
www.kaiehnes.com Ep28 Trust, You Say Hello and Welcome to the Way of the Emotional Warrior Podcast. My name is Kai Ehnes and today we will be answering the question of ___. Why is so hard to trust: others, god/source, yourself? The last few weeks have been quite tumultuous for us. Lots of big decisions to say the least. What has been most interesting to me is seeing and learning what real trust looks like. Here is how I used to see trust. If you try to live an ethical and moral life it puts you into that vibrational frequency. Other people are also in the same vibrational field. To me, this meant that they would be completely trustworthy. Then of course came the character arc and you find out that they did something that ended up breaking that band of trust you thought you had with them. Of course, not to lay blame only on others, I inadvertently also changed my mind about some things and that would be grounds for a breech of trust in their eyes. Certainly a difficult process, this thing called trust. So, have I learned anything? I think so. Trust is more about yourself and your approach to the world. I generally approach the world and my day believing in myself, my place in the world, and process known as life. That is a basic requirement for me. If I wake up and as of the first second I don't trust anyone or anything then I am not sure there is a point to engaging in the day. Here is what I have experienced lately. I believe dreams and goals do work out. Sometimes what you had in mind is not necessarily the best use of your skills so you need to be nudged accordingly. This is the process of life. The things you thought should have worked out and that don't simply means that you have to do something else. When you are in the right place doing the right things, everything becomes easy. All green lights, doors open easily for you. The right opportunities emerge and you have the wherewithal to take immediate and decisive action. Then the two way street takes on its own life and momentum. This is a beautiful thing. Is it hard to get to this place of being in the “zone” of your life? Here is a nugget! It is only as difficult as you are resistant to it. Crazy right? Let me offer an example: let's say you are a plumber but you should really have a family style ice cream shop. When someone points it out to you, which inevitable will happen, you scoff at the suggestion and carry on doing the job you can't stand. That is a simple example of resistance. The emotion of pain and suffering resides underneath that resistance and the best way to integrate your new life is through trust. Trust what? Why is it so difficult to trust anyway? I find that my outlook on life and actions I take are consistent with how much they align to my heart. Ever since I have adopted heart-mind coherence into my life, slowly but surely the ship called my life has recalibrated itself to the direction allowing me to be my most authentic self in my daily life. So, what I am saying is this. Each of us is special. We have a place in this life on this planet. This purpose is supposed to be how we live. For me, there has been a lot of trial and error. Nothing easy about the process of getting there. But once it became clearer that I was only blocking myself by over-thinking everything and subsequently moving my awareness into my heart…trust just became the basis of my experience. Since part of the Way of The Emotional Warrior is to look at neuroscience, I wanted to see if the field had some answers about trust. According to Researcher Paul Zak, he found that trust, the simple process of at least 2 people being able to be vulnerable with each other, actually has a chemical foundation. His team isolate that chemical to be oxytocin. He set up experiments that proved that with more oxytocin, people were more like to trust a stranger. Also, they were less willing to take extreme gambling risks. He... Support this podcast
www.kaiehnes.com Ep27 Hello and Welcome to the Way of the Emotional Warrior Podcast. My name is Kai Ehnes and today we will be answering the question of ___ Is it right to ask for Abundance? When I first encountered this idea of asking for abundance, I instantly had my hackles go up. My childhood programming came right into the forefront. Who do you think you are? What makes you think you have a right to more than your lot in life? If you dare ask for it, you will surely be met by some sort of calamity. Its quite interesting how the mindset of my family had such limitations. I thought about why other people had abundance. When I was young I simply attributed it to fate and luck, for both sides of that question. However, as time and life have given me some perspective, I have moreso adopted a quote from Adam Savage, one of the hosts of the TV show Mythbusters. He said, “I reject your reality and substitute my own.” I just love that line. It takes courage but it is well worth it. So if I reject my childhood programming on abundance, what is the substitute? Abundance my friends, abundance. Years ago, the movie “The Secret” came out and it simply disrupted my sleepwalker ways. It talked about the law of attraction and how we can align with it. This took me down years of rabbit holes, research and great discoveries. It turns out there are quite a few LAWS of the universe. At first it was daunting and frustrating because who is to say this typoe of thinking is correct? Napoleon Hill's Think and Grow Rich put me on the right track and all of a sudden a treasure trove of thinkers from a bygone time emerged. What they had in common was the awareness, realization and implementation of these so called LAWS. How can this benefit us as Emotional Warriors? The answer is quite simple. Aligning with and living within the LAWS allows us to live the type of life that is intended for us on this planet. The great Buckminster Fuller wrote a book called Earth: The Operator's Manual. It is a quick read but tells us that there are rules to live by while on this planet. These rules are LAWS. Once you understand why you are here and what being here is about you can slowly by way of KAIZEN continuous improvement, build your life to be what you want it to be. Think about that for a second You can build the life that YOU want. So where to begin. Kathleen McGowen writes the following steps. 1. Get clear with God, source, the divine 2. Embrace your place within the divine plan 3. Make a commitment to be of service to your fellow humans and the planet - Now you have earned the right to ask God/source to expand the abundance in your life. With that in mind please be careful of what you ask for. Ask, believe, receive is the name of the game. So don't ask for what you don't want. She says to really focus on the quality of your life. Stuff is nice but you get over it quickly. There is no sustainability in worshipping stuff. So now comes the quality of your life. Why do you want something? What would you do with a windfall of money? How do you relate to this quality of life? Here is an example: “I want to have a nice house for my family. I want us to enjoy living together, to be safe and allow us to live our lifestyles.” This is a simple request. But look at what was asked for. Its about the relationships in the house. The getting along, the love and the ability to expand. That is quite different from the idea of I have to have a 4 BR house, 2.5 bathrooms, 2 car garage. What if you got this house but no love in the home. What good is the house? So let's tie this all together. Yes, there are rules of how to live on this planet and with each other. Those rules are designed to work in your favor. You slowly learn how to operate within those rules and you start to incrementally see the... Support this podcast
www.kaiehnes.com Ep26 Gratitude Hello and Welcome to the Way of the Emotional Warrior Podcast. My name is Kai Ehnes today I wanted to take a moment and express my gratitude. I am grateful for this podcast and grateful for all of you, my tribe. I love making this podcast and having the opportunity to share it with you. If you would like to find out how to create calm in times of chaos, I would like to invite you to visit my website at kaiehnes.com I wish you a great Thanksgiving Holiday and wish you and your families the best. Be safe and stay healthy. Peace Support this podcast
www.kaiehnes.com Ep25 Broken Heart…not so much Hello and Welcome to the Way of the Emotional Warrior Podcast. My name is Kai Ehnes and today we will be answering the question of Can your heart actually be broken? Think of all the ways people experience a broken heart. Some causes of a broken heart can be: A relationship breakup, people letting you down, people not stepping up for you, someone does not say Thank You when you do something for them, they don't say I love you back, sadness, loss, rejection It is a long list of possible culprits but in the end these shocks to the system cause a reaction in your system. Rightfully so. You feel it in your gut, maybe you can't breathe, your throat tightens up, you want to scream but you can't, you shake, feel nauseous, get depressed…on and on This is actually all emotional pain but it certainly feels physical. According to Guy Winch PhD, fMRI studies have found that heartbreak activates the same mechanisms in the brain that get activated when addicts are withdrawing from substances like cocaine and opioids. These powerful withdrawal symptoms from the loss of love impact our ability to think, focus, and function in the broadest terms. Neuroscience is showing the intensity of the emotional stress a broken heart can have on our system. Emotional pain sits deep in ourselves, hurts and tends to stay around for quite a while. Our survival brain is wired to protect us so quite often emotional pain generates rumination. Thinking negative thoughts over and over. They keep us awake and offer no solution. By no means do I want to make light of this issue. It is obviously a widespread experience amongst human beings. However, lets look at this from the perspective of an emotional warrior. Is there opportunity within a broken heart? Can we do something about it that is healthy and productive for us? What if a heart can't really be broken? What I mean is this. Instead of the heart being broken, I mean consider the language, is it really broken? If so, why do we even bother trying to mend it? Broken is broken. Super glue or duct tape can't fix what's really broken. What if its actually more along the lines of expansion. These are very sophisticated matters of the heart. Experiences we think break us are actually what move us out of the old into the new. Let's look at an example. You are in a relationship. You think everything is moving along nicely. One day I becomes clear one of you is no longer getting their needs met, specifically your emotional needs. So you or the other person look for ways to pacify those needs. Maybe you find it super easy to talk to a coworker or you create online relationships etc… The result is the same. One of you has outgrown the relationship. In emotional language, your vibrational levels are no longer in harmony. Then cones the drawn out attempts at reconciliation or simply hanging in there hoping it will get better. But it doesn't. What is happening? Your heart is trying to expand. You came here, or found yourself here…either way, it is pretty clear that we live best with a purpose. Purpose driven life baby!!! Having said that, relationships where both people work with each other, challenge each other, support each other, grow with each other…those are the ones that last. Think of empowerment. An empowered heart cannot be a broken heart. Your heart is the seat of your life force. Why else do we say the things we say about the heart. Like: “Trust me, I love you from the bottom of my heart.” Or “I love you with all of my heart!” This doesn't sound like a fragile place in my world. The heart is your strongest place of truth and determination. When it expands, so does your consciousness. In the quantum world, your heart becomes your energy generator. Raising your own vibration impacts and lifts the vibration of... Support this podcast