Podcasts about playful parenting

You can listen wherever you get your podcasts, OR— BRAND NEW: we've included a fully edited transcript of our interview at the bottom of this post.In this episode of The Peaceful Parenting Podcast, I do a coaching call with Joanna who has a 2-year-old and a 7-year-old. We cover how to make mindset shifts so you can better show up for your kids, as well as get into specifics around night weaning, bedtime battles, handling meltdowns, playful parenting and increasing our connection to our kids.**If you'd like an ad-free version of the podcast, consider becoming a supporter on Substack! > > If you already ARE a supporter, the ad-free version is waiting for you in the Substack app or you can enter the private feed URL in the podcast player of your choice.Know someone who might appreciate this post? Share it with them!We talk about:* 6:40 how to manage meltdowns* 9:00 Night weaning and bedtime challenges* 20:00 Emptying a full emotional backpack* 26:00 Kids who always want more attention* 28:00 Understanding blame and anger* 38:00 Games to play when a child is looking for more power* 44:00 How our mindset makes such a big difference when parenting* 47:30 Two keys to peaceful parenting!* 55:00 Playful approaches to bedtimeResources mentioned in this episode:* Yoto Player-Screen Free Audio Book Player* The Peaceful Parenting Membership* How to Help Our Little Ones Sleep with Kim Hawley * Episode 100: When Your Child Has a Preferred Parent (or Not) with Sarah and Corey * Episode 103: Playful Parenting with Lawrence Cohen * Playful Heart Parenting with Mia Wisinski: Episode 186 xx Sarah and CoreyYour peaceful parenting team- click here for a free short consult or a coaching sessionVisit our website for free resources, podcast, coaching, membership and more!>> Please support us!!! Please consider becoming a supporter to help support our free content, including The Peaceful Parenting Podcast, our free parenting support Facebook group, and our weekly parenting emails, “Weekend Reflections” and “Weekend Support” - plus our Flourish With Your Complex Child Summit (coming back in the spring for the 3rd year!) All of this free support for you takes a lot of time and energy from me and my team. If it has been helpful or meaningful for you, your support would help us to continue to provide support for free, for you and for others.In addition to knowing you are supporting our mission to support parents and children, you get the podcast ad free and access to a monthly ‘ask me anything' session.Our sponsors:YOTO is a screen free audio book player that lets your kids listen to audiobooks, music, podcasts and more without screens, and without being connected to the internet. No one listening or watching and they can't go where you don't want them to go and they aren't watching screens. BUT they are being entertained or kept company with audio that you can buy from YOTO or create yourself on one of their blank cards. Check them out HERETranscript:Hey everyone. Welcome back to another episode of the Peaceful Parenting Podcast. Today's episode is a coaching episode. My guest is Joanna, mom of a 7-year-old and a 2-year-old. Joanna's 7-year-old is an intense child, and she wanted to know how to handle her big feelings and find more connection with her.She also had some specific challenges around bedtime, namely that her partner works shift work and is not home at bedtime. She still breastfeeds her 2-year-old to sleep, so is unavailable to her seven-year-old for a bit, and then has trouble getting her seven-year-old to bed without a fight. Joanna also shared how low she was on resources, and we had a great discussion about how that impacts her parenting and what she might do about it.Also, meltdowns—we talked about those too and how to respond. I know Joanne is not alone. One note: after we did the follow-up call, I realized I forgot to ask her about a few things. So she kindly recorded a couple of P.S.'s that I'll include. If you're curious, like I am, you'll be glad she gave us the latest updates.If you would like to come on the podcast and be coached by me, I am looking for a few parents who are interested. You can email me at sarah@sarahrosensweet.com.As always, please give us a five-star rating and a review on your favorite podcast app, and if you know another parent or caregiver that this would be helpful for, please screenshot it and send it to them. The best way to reach more families with peaceful parenting is through word of mouth, so we really appreciate any shares that you might be able to give us.Okay. Let's meet Joanna. Okay.Sarah: Hi Joanna. Welcome to the podcast.Joanna: Hi. Thanks for having me.Sarah: Tell me a little bit about yourself.Joanna: Sure. I live up in Ottawa, Canada, with my husband and my two kids. I'm a music therapist, so right now I'm working with babies. I teach Yoga with Baby and, um, a class called Sing and Sign at a local wellness center.Sarah: Nice. How old are—Joanna: Yes, I have a 7-year-old girl who we'll call Jay.Sarah: Okay.Joanna: And then a 2-year-old boy called JR.Sarah: JJ. Okay, perfect. Okay, so how can I support you today?Joanna: Yeah, so my daughter has always been, like, a bit of a tricky one. Um. She was born premature, so at 29 weeks. And no kind of lasting effects. But as she's gotten older, we've noticed, like, she's really struggled a lot with emotional regulation. Um, and she kind of gets stuck on certain behaviors. So I feel like we've done a lot to change our parenting, in part thanks to you and your podcast and all the material. Um, I did finally read, um, Peaceful Parent, Happy Kids this past summer.Sarah: Mm-hmm.Joanna: And I feel like it also had a huge effect, just having, like, that bigger scope of understanding of, like, the peaceful parenting philosophy.Sarah: Uh-huh.Joanna: So I would say, like, even from where we were a few months ago, we've experienced tons of positive shifts with her.Sarah: Sweet.Joanna: Yeah, so we're already kind of well on our way, but there are certain behaviors that she has that still I find really perplexing. So I wondered if maybe we could go over a couple of them.Sarah: Sure. Yeah, no problem. For anyone—if, for anyone who doesn't know, Peaceful Parent, Happy Kids is the book written by my mentor, who I trained with, Dr. Laura Markham. Um, and just for my own curiosity, what do you think? Because, you know, I always worry that people are—that they don't have the fully formed idea of peaceful parenting. And that—and I'm not saying you, because you've listened to the podcast so you probably have a deeper understanding—but some people are just getting their little snippets on Instagram reels, you know, and so it is hard to understand, like, the, the sort of the core reasons why we do the approach if you don't have that deeper understanding. And also, I'm working on a book right now, so hopefully soon you'll be able to say you read my book. But what did you—what do you feel like got fleshed out for you when you read that book?Joanna: I think she really breaks a lot of things down step by step, such as, like, what to do when your child is going through a meltdown.Sarah: Mm-hmm.Joanna: And that has always been an area—like, when my daughter gets to that point where she's, like, become really explosive and aggressive and she's just, like, in it and she's kind of unreachable at that moment—like, what to do step by step at that time. I think, like, that's been the most helpful because I've been able to really settle into my own parenting and just, like, really trust myself and anchor in at that point, which is exactly really what she needs and what was missing.Sarah: Yeah. Yeah.Joanna: So—Sarah: So I think, um—like I always say, focus on regulating yourself first. Like, when someone's having a meltdown, empathize.Joanna: Yeah.Sarah: Um, you know, it—yeah, it's—it can be hard because you often feel like you need to do something. And even though you're saying step by step, it's less about doing anything than just centering yourself, staying calm yourself, trying to get in touch with the compassion and empathy even if you're not—some pe—some parents say, “Oh, well, when I try to say anything, then my kid just screams more.” So sometimes it's just empathize—like, getting connected in your own heart to the empathy and compassion, even if you're not saying anything—and that, that does something.Joanna: Absolutely it does. Yeah.Sarah: Yeah.Joanna: Yeah, so that's all been really helpful. Now, in—in terms of emotional regulation, I do definitely think that that's the biggest piece.Sarah: Okay.Joanna: Uh, it's been the biggest piece for me and sort of, like, one of the big things that I wanted to talk to you about today is we are still really not getting sleep because my 2-year-old is not a good sleeper and has never been a good sleeper. And we've gone through periods where I'm like, okay, now he's only waking up, like, twice a night, and that feels manageable. Um, but he's kind of been back to waking up, like, three to six times a night again, which is so hard. And then my husband's very supportive; however, he works afternoons, so he's gone from about 3:00 PM to 1:00 AM, so he needs to be able to sleep until about eight, which means I'm up with my son between six and seven. My daughter gets up for school around 7:30, so that's, like, a tricky time of day because she's really quite grumpy in the morning. He's not—the toddler's really, like, kind of a totally different temperament. But, like, I'm tired after struggling with, like, night wakings all night. And then I'm with the kids from the time that she gets home from school, um, and then doing both bedtimes myself.Sarah: Mm-hmm.Joanna: Um, so there's a lot of time where, like, I am solo parenting, and I'm definitely, like, the preferred parent. Um, and both my kids really want me and need me at bedtime. So he is still nursing—like, I'm nursing to sleep and then nursing during the night. And I know that that's probably contributing a lot to all the night wakings. So, I guess my question is, like, I am at the point where I am ready to night-wean. I probably should have done it already, but—Sarah: Don't say “should have.” Like, it's—if you're not ready to make that change, like, in your heart, it's really torturous to try to—try to, like, not—so say you decide you want to night-wean, but you weren't really ready to do it. It would be so painful for you to deny your son nursing in the night if you were—if you didn't feel in your heart, like, “No, this is the right thing to do. I'm totally ready. I think he's ready.” So, so I think waiting until you're really, like, actually, yes, “I'm done with this,” is a smart thing. Yeah. So don't beat yourself up for not having done it already. But you're right, it probably does contribute to him waking up in the night.Joanna: Yeah. And, um, I do feel like I—I'm ready. I just—I'm not quite sure how to make that shift. So what generally happens is, like, we have some, like, virtual babysitting going on with my mom, where, like, when I nurse my son to sleep, which generally takes, like, between maybe 30 and 45 minutes, she'll, like, sit with her and do a workbook. So we'll have, like, a video chat, and then after—Sarah: Yeah, it's great.Joanna: So then after, um, I'm with her to get her ready for bed, and that oftentimes looks like a lot of, like, dragging heels on, like, “Oh, I want another snack,” and “I wanna, like, brush my teeth,” and “Whatever—don't wanna brush my teeth.” So, um, then that ends up taking usually about an hour, but we both sort of have, like, this expiration at about 9:00 PM, where, like, she just gets so dysregulated because she's so tired.Sarah: Mm-hmm.Joanna: So if I don't have her in bed at that point and, like, already kind of with the lights out, there's often just, like, a meltdown and some—like, she'll start calling me names and start, like, you know, throwing stuff down at me and whatnot. And then I'm just really tired by that point too. Yeah. So we can kind of joke around about it now—like, nine o'clock is the time where we're, like, where we both expire. So I'm trying to figure out, like, how can I night-wean? Because I know that that is supposed to start with, like, him being able to fall asleep by himself at the beginning of the night, so—Sarah: Mm-hmm.Joanna: Slowly phasing that out and laying with him. I know it's gonna probably take a lot longer in the beginning, so I'm just a little worried that, like, maybe if it takes, like, an hour, an hour and a half, then all of a sudden she's kind of, like, left hanging and it's getting later and her bedtime's being pushed back.Sarah: Are there any—are there any nights that your partner is home at bedtime?Joanna: There's two—Sarah: nights that—Joanna: he—Sarah: is,Joanna: yeah.Sarah: Yeah. I mean, I guess I would start with those nights.Joanna: Yeah.Sarah: Yeah. Start with those nights. And—and when was your son's birthday? Like, like how—two—is he—Joanna: He just turned two, like, two weeks ago.Sarah: Okay. So, I mean, I think I would start with trying to just practice, you know, nursing him and maybe nursing him somewhere else and then bringing him back, you know, and then putting him in—are you co-sleeping?Joanna: Sleep—yeah. Well, I put him—like, I generally nurse him to sleep. He has a floor bed in his room, and then I go to bed in my own room, and then at his first wake, then I go back in, and I just stay there for the room—the rest of the night from that point.Sarah: Right, right. So I, I guess I would try just, like, nursing him and trying to, like, pat his back and sing to him and, you know, tell him that—that he can have—I, I mean, what we did was, “You can have milk in the morning,” you know, “You could have it when it's light.” I remember my oldest son—when he—it took him a couple of days—and if you wanna hear the whole story of my failed night-weaning with my second son, it was in a podcast that we did about infant and toddler sleep, uh, with Kim.Joanna: Yeah, Kim?Sarah: Yes. So you could listen to that if you haven't heard that already. But my second—my first son was super easy to night-wean, and a couple of—it was, like, a couple of nights of a little bit of crying, and he would just say, “Make it light, Mama. Make it light,” because he wanted—I said, “You can nurse when it's light.” But, you know, I, I, I don't wanna get into that whole big thing on this podcast because—mm-hmm—just because I've already talked about it. But if you wanna listen to that, and if you have any questions when we do our follow-up, you can, uh, you can ask me. But, you know, I would just try, you know, talking to him about, then, you know, “You can have Milky in the morning,” or whatever you call it, and, you know, those two—see how it goes for those two nights where your partner's around. And if it doesn't—I would say, if it still seems really hard, maybe just waiting to do it until—I don't know if you have any other support you could enlist. You mentioned your mother—maybe she could come and visit, you know, because I do think it would be hard to try and do this and do the solo bedtimes for a while. So I don't know if there's a time when your mom could come visit or if there's some other support that you could have. But yeah—Joanna: I think the tricky part with that is that, like, she—even with my husband—like, she doesn't want him to put her to bed.Sarah: Mm-hmm.Joanna: And depending on the kind of night that she's having, sometimes she'll end up, like, screaming, and their bedrooms are right beside each other. So we've had it before where, like, she'll start having a meltdown and, like, wake him up, and then he's not able to fall asleep either. And then we—Sarah: There's also—your husband could be with your son.Joanna: It's the same—same situation though. Like, he doesn't—him—Sarah: It sounds—it sounds like possibly—I mean, there—kids do have preferred parents even when, um, they do have good connection with the—with the other parent. And you could maybe still work—have some—that be something that you're working on, having your partner, you know, maybe even practicing having—before you start doing the night-weaning—practicing having your partner doing some of the bedtime stuff. When you are—when, you know, when—before you're starting to make a change so that your son doesn't associate, you know, “I'm not getting what I want,” and my dad, you know, putting me to sleep.Joanna: Yeah.Sarah: So I would maybe try to get your partner a little bit more involved in bedtime before making a change. And—and even if there's some crying—we also have a podcast about preferred parents that you could listen to. So I—you know, I think maybe you do have a little bit of pre-work to do before you start doing the night-weaning, and, in terms of when—how can you get support at bedtime?Joanna: Yeah.Sarah: Okay.Joanna: I mean, the other option is if you just kick it down the road more and—or, you know, there isn't—there's actually a third option now that I think about it—it's that you still nurse him to sleep but then don't nurse him when you wake him up—when he wakes up in the night. Get him to go back to sleep without that.Sarah: I hadn't thought about that, because I think that everything that I've heard has been, like, they have to fall asleep on their own because then they're always gonna be—Joanna: looking—Sarah: for—Joanna: Yeah. Yeah.Sarah: But I mean, you could still try it.Joanna: Hmm. Okay.Sarah: Or you could try shortening the—you know, give him a little bit of milk and then see if he'll go to sleep, um, after he has a little bit, but without nursing to sleep.Joanna: Okay. Yeah. Okay, I'll give that some thought and try some different things there.Sarah: Mm-hmm.Joanna: Okay. Thank you. But yeah, I feel like just starting to get sleep again is pretty important. So, even in terms of, like, being able to center myself to handle all of the things that goes on with my daughter during the day, that feels like a really important piece right now.Sarah: For sure. And if she's—if she's some nights not going—it sounds like quite frequently maybe she's not asleep before nine.Joanna: Yeah.Sarah: And what time does she wake up?Joanna: 7:30.Sarah: 7:30. So do you think she's getting enough sleep?Joanna: Probably not. She's really lethargic in the morning.Sarah: Mm-hmm.Joanna: But I can't really seem to figure out how to be able to get her to sleep. Like, I did talk to her about it, and she was like, “Well, maybe when I turn eight, like, I can start putting myself to bed.” And I was like, “Okay, well what—what would that look like?” And she kind of went through, like, “Okay, I'll, you know, I'll brush my teeth on the phone with Grandma, and then I'll just, like, read in bed.” And—but this is, like, in a moment where she's feeling very regulated.Sarah: Right, right, right. And when's her birthday?Joanna: Uh, in about two months.Sarah: Okay. Yeah. Um, have you had a conversation with her about how neither of you likes the fighting at night? And, you know—and does she have any, like—not in the moment, but does she have any ideas of, you know, how you can solve the problem of her not, you know, not wanting to go to bed and then getting too tired and then getting really cranky?Joanna: Yeah, we have—we have talked about it, and we can talk about it with, like, a little bit more levity now, but I don't think that she's actually—we've gone to, like, the problem-solving—Sarah: Mm-hmm.Joanna: of that.Sarah: I mean, that might be a helpful conversation to have with her and just say, “You know, I've been thinking about what often happens at night, you know, and I totally get it, that you don't wanna go to bed. Like, you know, when I was a kid, I never wanted to go to bed, and I would've stayed up all night if I could. And I'm sure you're the same because it's just—you know, when you're young, going to bed is, like, you know, not any fun at all.” And you can make—you could even make a joke, like, “When you're old like me, like, you can't wait to go to bed.” But of course when you're young, you don't wanna go to sleep, and I totally get that. So, like, lots of empathy and acknowledging, like, her perspective. And—and then you could say, “And at the same time, you know, you do—you know, why do you think it's important to sleep?” So I guess you could have that conversation with her too about, like, you know, what happens when we're sleeping that—your, you know, you could talk about how your cells, like, fix themselves. Also we grow when we're sleeping—like, we get the—like, the growth hormone gets secreted, and that's the—if we don't get enough sleep, we're not gonna grow and we're not gonna feel happy the next day. So you can, like, talk to her about the importance of sleep. And then you could say, like, “So, you know, I know you don't wanna go to sleep, and I know how important it is, and now you do too. And, you know—and I hate fighting with you at bedtime. You know, do you have any ideas for how we can solve this problem? Because I really want us both to go to bed feeling happy and connected.”Joanna: Yeah. Yeah, that's a great suggestion. Thank you. I think the biggest barrier to her getting to bed on time is she is finally feeling, like, a bit more calm and relaxed at night. Like, she comes home after school with a lot—she's holding a lot from school. They have, like, a point system for good behavior at school.Sarah: Oh.Joanna: And you should see how she racks up the points. She has great behavior at school. The teacher's, like—would never believe what goes on at home.Sarah: Of course, yeah.Joanna: So then she comes home, and it's, like, a lot of unloading. So I feel like by that time of night she's, like, ready to pursue her hobbies. Like, she's like, “Oh, I just wanna do this one more little”—you know, she's drawing something, and it's always like, “I just need to finish this,” because once she gets started on something, she can't seem to break her focus on—We're very much suspecting ADHD. That's gonna be probably in the next year we pursue a diagnosis, but—Sarah: Typically—do have a lot of trouble falling asleep—that's with ADHD. What about—you know, so two outta three of my kids had a lot of trouble falling asleep, and they're both my ADHD kids, and what really helped them was something to listen to at night. You know—Joanna: Yeah, she does listen to podcasts falling asleep—Sarah: Does listen to stuff.Joanna: Yeah, she's always listened—listened to, like, a story falling asleep. I think part of it too is we don't get a lot of one-on-one time throughout the day.Sarah: Mm-hmm.Joanna: Because my son's around in the morning.Sarah: Mm-hmm.Joanna: And it's usually just the three of us until my husband wakes up, which is shortly before she goes to school. And then it's again the three of us from after school till bedtime most days, except for the two days a week that he's off.Sarah: Well, I mean, that's something to explore too, like, in—are there, you know—I don't know if you live in a neighborhood that has some, like, tweens that could come over and play with your son for an hour—you know, just someone really fun that he would like to play with—and then you and your daughter could have some time together. Because what I was gonna say when you said that she comes home with what we call the “full backpack” in Peaceful Parenting—which is, she's been carrying around, for anyone who's listening who doesn't know what that is, it's a concept that my mentor, Dr. Laura, came up with—where you're holding on to all of the stresses, big feelings, tensions from the day, and then when you come home, it's too much to, you know, to keep holding onto it. And so that's what you were just referring to, is just that she's got a lot to unpack after the day at school. And so I'm wondering—so when you mentioned that, I was gonna say, like, what could you do to try to proactively get some of that emptied out? Couple of ideas: do you do any roughhousing with her?Joanna: We actually just started doing that, and I couldn't believe how much she was into it. Yeah, I was super surprised. But I also think that it's taken just a lot of, like, repair with our relationship to get to the point that I've even been able to try some of this stuff. Like, because at first, like, when I first started hearing about some of these, like, peaceful—I, I don't know if you'd call them techniques—but, like, being playful and, um, roughhousing and things like that—she was so not open to anything at all because she was just so serious and so edgy and like, “Get away from me,” like, so irritable. So now I think that we've just—I've poured a lot of time in on weekends just to, like, spend time together that's enjoyable, and I'm noticing a huge shift. So now we are able to do some of these things, and it—it is turning out more positively.Sarah: Good. I mean, as you're speaking, I'm thinking that it sounds like there was maybe, um, quite a—a breach when your son was born, like, the last two years. Or, or do you feel like your relationship has always been a little strained even before that?Joanna: I feel like maybe it's always been a little fraught. I don't know if his birth had, like, a huge impact on that. Um, it has always been pretty strained.Sarah: Okay, okay.Joanna: Just because she's the more challenging kid?Sarah: I think so. And, you know, when she was two there was the pandemic. I think, like, I was carrying a lot of trauma after the whole NICU experience with her. And then we had the pandemic, and then we moved, and then I got pregnant, and then I had my son. So it's like there's sort of been these, like, things along the way where—yeah, I don't know.Sarah: Yeah. Okay. Well, I mean, that's good that you brought that up because I think that, you know, maybe that's gonna be the pre-work—that even before bedtime starts to feel better is really working on—you know, if you can get some support in, because it is really hard to have one-on-one time with a 2-year-old who probably doesn't wanna leave you alone. But even if—you know, continue with your sort of bulking up on the weekends with that time with her and do some, like, roughhousing and special time with her. Do you guys do special time?Joanna: Yeah. And that's something I wanted to talk about because special time has been sort of a big fail when I call it special time and when we set a timer for special time, because it really tends to dysregulate her, I think, because she's like, “Oh my God, I only have you for 15 minutes.” Mm-hmm. She gets really stressed out, and then she's like—oftentimes she likes to do these, like, elaborate pretend plays—things which need, like, a lot, a lot of setup time. Yeah. So she'll be like, “Pause the timer so I can set this up,” and then it just becomes, like, more tension between us. Like, it's not enjoyable.Sarah: It's one of those things where, like, you really have to adjust it to how it works for your particular family. Um, so, you know, maybe you just have, like, a couple hours with her on the weekend and you're—and it would be good for your—your partner and your son too. Maybe he could take him to the park or go and—you know, for them to work on their connection, which might make him a little bit more willing to go to bed with his dad, you know, on the nights that your partner is home. So, you know, I would really work on that connection with her and do those pretend play things with her. And even—you know, and this is maybe obvious, which is why I didn't say it before—but, you know, partly she's dragging her heels because that's the only time she has you to herself—at bedtime, right?Joanna: Yeah.Sarah: And so she doesn't want that to end because that's the only time that it—her brother's asleep—she has you all to herself. So if you can increase the time where she has you all to herself, she might be more willing to, um, to go to bed. Yeah. The other thing I was gonna say is, do you have anything that you do together at bedtime that would be, like—it sounds like she's dragging her heels to actually get in bed. Is there anything that you can do to entice her to get in bed, like a chapter book that you're reading her, that you read a chapter every night or something like that?Joanna: Yeah, and that has worked in the past, but it can—it can also kind of cause tension because I find, like, then I am a lot more apt to kind of hold it as, like, a bargaining chip instead of, like, “Oh, let's get to that.” Right. But lately we've been playing cards, and she's really motivated to, like, play a game of cards when we're in bed. So that seems to be working right now, but it's always kind of like—it changes all the time.Sarah: Right, right. Well, just keeping—thinking of something that you can use to make getting in bed seem more attractive? Um, maybe—I mean, my kids used to love hearing stories about me when I was little or about them when they were little. So it could even just be, like, a talk time. I know Corey, who works with me, does—she started doing a 10-minute talk time with one of her sons, who's a little bit older than—than your daughter, but where they just have, you know, this time where they just get in bed and he tells her stuff and they—they talk. So that could be something too—just really pure, straight-up connection.Joanna: Yeah. Okay, I like that. Maybe I can just ask you a couple more things about some of the things I—She's kind of a person that really wants constant connection too. Like, it does feel like I could spend, like, all day with her, and then she—once it's over, she would still be like, “Well, why are we not still—” like, it—we've always kind of—my husband and I will joke that she's got, like, a leaky cup because it's, like, “Just fill up their cup,” but it doesn't seem to matter. He used to play with her for, like, two to three hours when she was younger, and then at the end she would just, like, not be satisfied. Like, it didn't seem like anything was going to, like, fill her cup.Sarah: And that—you know what, there are kids like that. I remember I had this client once whose son actually said to her, “Mama, all the—all the hours in the world are not enough time with you.” And there are some kids that are really just like that. And, you know, I'm not sure how you respond when she says, like, you know, “But we hardly even got to play,” after you play for three hours. I mean, that playful—like, “Oh my gosh, like, what if we could just play all day?” You know, either, like, playful response of, like, “We could play for 27 hours,” you know, “and—and—and we would still have so much fun together.” Or just pure empathy, you know, like, “Oh no, it just feels like it's never enough time, is it?”Joanna: And it almost seems like sometimes when I am empathetic, it almost, like, fuels her anger. I don't know if you've ever heard that before from anybody else, but—eh, I don't know. Like, we had a situation with—like, she was looking for a specific bear last weekend—a teddy bear that she's missing—because she wanted to bring it to a teddy bear picnic. And so we were sort of, like, you know, we had to get out the door to go to this party. She couldn't find this bear, and I was, like, you know, offering a lot of empathy, and just, like—the more that I was like, “I know, like, you're so frustrated; you're so disappointed that you can't find your bear,” it was like the more that she was like, “Yeah, and you took it, you hid it, you put it somewhere.” Like, it just—the more empathy I gave, it seemed like the more that she was using it as almost, like, fuel to be upset. Does that make sense? Right.Sarah: Yeah. No, that's pretty common. And the thing is, you have to remember that blame is trying to offload difficult feelings. It's like, “I don't wanna feel this way, so I'm gonna blame you.” And then—you know, it's anger—have you ever seen the image of the anger iceberg?Joanna: Yes.Sarah: Yeah. So the anger iceberg is, like, the anger is the only thing you see coming out of the water. But underneath the iceberg are all of the more tender feelings, right? And anger is actually a secondary emotion. So you don't start out by feeling angry. You feel—like, like for her, she maybe was feeling frustrated and disappointed that she couldn't find her bear. And those are the first feelings. But those more tender feelings are harder to feel, and so anger is often protective. And the tender feelings also set off that—you know, that overwhelm of our emotions registers as a threat to the nervous system, which sets off that fight, flight, or freeze. So there's all those things going on, right? Like, the blame of, like, trying to offload the feelings; the anger of feeling like it's easier to go on the offensive than to feel those tender feelings; and then the nervous system getting set off by that overwhelm that registers as a threat, right? It sets off the fight, flight, or freeze. And they're—they're kind of all different ways of saying the same thing. And yes, empathy often will help a child—that they get more in touch with those feelings. And I'm not saying that you don't wanna empathize, um, but just recognize that, you know, the feelings are happening, and when you empathize, they—you know, you're welcoming the feelings, which sometimes can have that fight, flight, or freeze effect.Joanna: And would you recommend that I continue to really lean into empathy more and just stay with all of that emotion until it passes?Sarah: So—totally depends. The other thing I was gonna say is it's possible—like the situation you just gave me—it's possible—like, how—were you actually feeling empathetic, or were you trying to just get out the door?Joanna: I think I was, but at a certain point I was like, “I think, you know, we have two options from here. Like, we can continue to be upset about the bear and it—it will make us late for the party, or at a certain point we can move on and make a new plan,” and, like, “get our—make our way over there.” So, um, is that effective? Yeah, I—I mean, she eventually was able to change gears. But, I mean, it doesn't feel like real life to just be able to, like, sit in your negative emotions all the time. And I think, like, maybe I struggle with doing that for, like, a long enough period of time to actually let her—let them out.Sarah: Well, I don't know—yeah. So, I mean, there's a difference between welcoming feelings and wallowing in emo—in emotion, I think.Joanna: Yeah. And she definitely is a wallower, and she almost has really, like, attached so much sadness and frustration and anger to this bear. Like, now she'll just, like, think about the bear and be like, “Oh, I still can't find that bear.” Like, she was just, like, you know, exploding about it again this past weekend. So it almost feels like she's just latching onto it to, like, feel bad there.Sarah: I mean, some kids—she's probably not choosing to latch onto it to feel bad, but she probably just has. So, so what I was gonna say is sometimes when kids seem to be wallowing, it's just that there's so much there that they haven't been able to get out on a regular basis. So I think it is just like a full backpack, and there's just a lot there. And it's not—it's probably not just about the bear. It's probably just like she's—it's, you know, processing other older things too. And you don't have to know what's in the backpack or try and figure it out. But you might find that if you had more opportunities for her to process feelings, then she might not get so stuck when they do start to come out.That's one thing that I would think of. Like—and more laughter should help with that. Like, more laughter and roughhousing to help her sort of process stuff. And also sometimes—so the bear thing reminds me of—some kids will just feel bad, you know, like feel bad sometimes from, like, a full backpack, or maybe they don't even know what it is, they can't connect. Or maybe they're just tired and low-resourced and their brain is kind of like, “Why do I feel bad? Why do I feel bad?” And she's like, “Oh, the bear.” You know, she remembers, like, the bear. Like, I've had clients tell me, my kid will say, like, “I miss Grandpa,” who they never met, who died before they were born—like, just kind of casting around for, like, “Why could I be feeling this way right now? Oh, I know—it's 'cause I can't find that bear.”Or maybe the bear is so important to her that it really is—that she thinks about it and it just makes her feel bad. But I think what you wanna remember when it seems like she's wallowing is that, you know, getting—like, having empathy. And I actually also did a podcast about this too, with another coaching call, where I talked about, you know, cultivating a certain amount of nonchalance after you feel like you've been pretty empathetic and welcomed the feelings. Because I think if we're too empathetic sometimes—and I do wanna be very careful with this because I don't want anyone to take this as, like, “Don't be empathetic”—but, you know, there is a time where you just say, like, “You know what? I hear how upset you are about this, and I get it. And I would be really bummed if I couldn't find the bear I wanted also. And we have to decide, like, are we gonna stay here and just keep feeling sad about the bear, or should we figure out another plan?” Like what you said, right.Joanna: Yeah, I have heard you say that before, and that's been so helpful for her. Mm-hmm. It seems like if I'm not so reactive to her emotions, she realizes that they're not an emergency either.Sarah: Yeah, yeah. Yeah. I mean—and that's a good point too, because I didn't even ask you, like, how's your regulation when this is happening? Like, are you getting, like, annoyed, frustrated, upset for her, kind of drawn in? Are you able to, like, kind of center yourself and stay calm?Joanna: It varies. I would say I currently am the most resourced that I've ever been—good with, like, the emotional regulation piece. And then that—I see, like, sometimes she is able to come out of it more quickly, or it just depends on, you know, what her tolerance is at that—at that time. So—Sarah: Joanna, it might be that, you know, you're coming out of—almost like you're coming out of a fog of, you know—you said all the things: like the NICU experience, and then the—and then COVID, and then your new baby, and—and that it might be that you're really, finally for the first time, kind of getting to tend—you know, look at yourself, your own regulation, and be more present and connected with your daughter. And all these things are gonna start having a little bit of, um, of a snowball effect. And it may be that you've just had this, like, seven-year period of difficulty, you know?Joanna: Oh, that's horrifying.Sarah: Well, but the good news is it sounds like things are shifting.Joanna: Yeah. It really does feel like that. Yeah. You're—I feel like even if I talked to you a few months ago, I would've been like, “Oh, help me.”Sarah: Well—and that you're recognizing what you brought—what you bring to the table, and that, you know, things have been fraught with your daughter, and that you're sort of starting to come out. And—and honestly, also doing that—doing that bedtime—after-school bedtime by yourself five days a week, that's gonna be tough too. Uh, so you've got situ—just that current situation doesn't sound like it'll change, but you're changing what you're bringing to it.Joanna: Yeah. Yeah. Um, if I can maybe just ask you, like, one more little thing?Sarah: Sure.Joanna: Maybe this is—it all comes back to, like, wanting a lot of connection, but this is also what kind of drains my battery. She constantly wants to, like, talk to me or ask me questions from, like, the time that she wakes up to the time that she goes to bed. And it will be—like, currently it's, like, “Would you rather.” It's like, “Would you rather eat all the food in the world or never eat again?” Uh-huh. In the past it's been, like, “Guess what's in my mouth?” But then she always really tries to make it—make me wrong in the circumstance, if that makes sense. Like, I don't know if that's just her, like, looking for power or, like, the upper hand, or like—I don't know. I'm not sure what it is.Sarah: Well, I mean, if you feel—if you have a sense that she's looking for power, I would bring that into the roughhousing—where you are the one who's weak and bumbling and idiotic, and, you know, you're so slow, and she beats you every time at a race. So I would really try to bring some of that—some of that stuff into your roughhousing where she gets to be—Do you know the kind of stuff I'm talking about? Like, “I bet you can't—um, you know, I bet you can't beat me at arm wrestling,” and then, like, you know, you flop your arm over in a silly way, and like, “How are you so strong? Like, I'm gonna beat you next time.” And it's obviously playful, because probably you are stronger than she is at this point, but, you know—feats of strength or speed, or, you know, figuring things out, and you act like you really don't know anything. And—but in, of course, in a joking way, so she knows that you're not—you know, you're pretending to be all these things, but she still gets to gloat and, like, “Ha, you know, I'm the strongest, I'm the best.” So really giving her that in roughhousing.And then also, like, real power. Like, I don't know if she gets to make—what kinds of decisions she gets to make, or, you know, how much—how flexible you are on limits. Because sometimes, as parents, we do set unnecessary limits, which can make our kids, you know—make them look for power in other ways. So really looking at what limits you're setting and if they're necessary limits, and—and how you're setting them. Uh, and also I think it sounds like it's connection-seeking—like, she just wants you. You know, she wants to know that you're there and paying attention to her. And so everything else that you're doing—that we're talking about—that you're gonna try to do more—more time with her and get more one-on-one time with her, hopefully that will help too.And I think it is okay to say, like, after you've done, like, 25 “would you rathers,” I just say—like, I used to say to my kids, “You know what? My brain is just feeling really stimulated from so many words. Like, can we have some quiet for a few minutes?” And not—and being very careful to not phrase it like, “You're talking too much,” or “I don't wanna listen to—” and I'm exaggerating for effect—but just framing it as, like, your brain and a regulation thing—like, “My brain,” and it is words. Yeah. And so, like, “Do you—should we put some music on?” You know, “Can we—like, think of—can you connect in a way that—let's listen to a story.” Okay. Something like that where you still, like, keep up connection with her, but—and it might not work. She—she might not be able to stop talking, but you can try it at least.Joanna: No, that's a—that's a really good suggestion. Almost like replacing it with some other kind of stimulation if she's looking for that in that moment.Sarah: Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay. So I think—I think it's just—I think it's fair. Like, it's totally—I, at the end of the day, with people, like, talking at me all day, I sometimes am like—you know, when my kids were younger, I'd be like, “Okay, you know, I—I just need a little—my brain needs a little bit of a break. It's feeling overstimulated.” So I think just using that language with her.Joanna: Okay. Okay. Great. Thank you. Well—Sarah: Yeah, I think you're—you know, I think that I've—that we've connected at a point where you're, like, at—you're, like, at the—sort of the top of a mountain, you know? And you've been, like, having all this struggle and uphill battles. And I think you've put—before even we talk—you've put a lot of pieces [together] of what—you know, why some of the challenges were. And they do seem to be connection—you know, connection-based, just in terms of, um, you know, her wanting more and you not being as resourced. And so hopefully working on connection is gonna help with that too.Joanna: Yeah. I'm gonna keep that at top of mind.Sarah: And your self-regulation too. You said you're—you know, you've been having—you're more resourced now than you ever have been, so you're able to work on really staying, like, calm and compassionate in those times when she's dysregulated. Going back to what I said in the beginning, which is that, you know, the steps for the meltdowns really start with our own regulation.Joanna: And I find it's a snowball effect too, because once you start seeing positive changes, it allows you to, like, rest in knowing that things will not always be so hard.Sarah: Yeah. So it—Joanna: It gives you motivation to keep going, I think.Sarah: Totally. And, you know, with complex kids—which it sounds like your daughter is one of those more complex kids—um, brain maturity makes such a huge difference. Um, like, every month and every year as she's starting to get older. And, you know, you mentioned ADHD—that you—that you suspect that she might be ADHD. ADHD kids are often around three years behind, um, in terms of what you might expect for them in terms of, like, their brain development. And not—and not across the board. But in terms of, like, their regulation, in terms of what they can do for themselves, um, like in—you know, and obviously every kid is different. But it really helps to think about, um, your ADHD kids as sort of, uh, developmentally younger than they are. My—my girlfriend who has—her son and my daughter are the same age, so they're both just starting college or university this year. And, um, she was—I—she lives in California, and I was talking to her, and her son has ADHD, and she was talking about how much support he's still needing in first-year college and how she was feeling a little bit like, “Oh, I feel like I shouldn't be supporting him this much when he's 18.” And—and she said, “Actually, I just re—you know, I always remind myself of what you told me a long time ago: to think of him as three years younger than he is in some ways,” and that that's made her feel a little bit better about the scaffolding that she's having to give him.Joanna: Yeah, I've never heard that before. That's good. She's also gonna be starting to work with an OT in a couple of weeks, so we'll see if that has any effect as well.Sarah: Cool.Joanna: Cool.Sarah: Alright, well, I look forward to catching up with you in around maybe three weeks or a month and seeing how things went, and, um, good luck, and I hope this was helpful and gave you some things to work on.Joanna: Okay. Thank you so much.Sarah: Hi Joanna. Welcome back to the podcast.Joanna: Hi Sarah.Sarah: So—how has—it's been about—I think it's been about four weeks since we talked the first time. How have things been?Joanna: Yeah, things I think have been going a little better. Like, every day is a little bit different. We definitely have, like, a lot of ups and downs still, but I think overall we're just on a better trajectory now. Um, it's actually—I was wondering if things—if, like, the behavior has actually been better, or if it's more just, like, my frame of mind.Sarah: That is the classic question because—it's so funny, I'm—I'm laughing because so much of the time when I'm coaching parents, after a couple of sessions they'll say, “This isn't even about my kids. This is all about me.” Right.Joanna: Yeah, it really, really is and just continues to be about, like, my own—not just frame of mind, but, like, my own self-regulation. That's always the biggest thing.Sarah: Yeah.Joanna: Um, I think the biggest challenge is, like—ever since, like, about six months ago, I just have had really bad PMS. So I find, like, the week before—Sarah: Mm-hmm.Joanna: I just feel so irritated by everything.Sarah: Yeah.Joanna: So I feel like that's a really—just so much more of a challenging time because then things that normally don't bother me are bothering me a lot more.Sarah: Right.Joanna: And then it's harder to keep that connection strong.Sarah: Totally. Yeah. And you also—as we mentioned last time—you have come off of a whole bunch of different events of, you know—we talked your daughter's premature birth, and then COVID, and then the new baby. And the new baby—you know, you're not sleeping that much, and, um, all of those things would make it also have your resources be low. Like, not only the PMS, but, like, anything that puts a tax on us—on our resources—is gonna make us more irritable.Joanna: Totally. And—but I'm really trying to lean into having a lot more compassion for myself, because I know that when I do that, I can have a lot more compassion for her and, mm-hmm, whatever's going on that she's bringing to the table too. So that's—that's, I think, probably the biggest thing. But I think that our relationship is just starting to have a lot more resilience—like, when things do start to go sideways, either she or I—we're able to kind of get back on track a lot more quickly than before, and it doesn't become as, like, entrenched.Sarah: That's awesome. And we—we talked last time about trying to get some more time with her so that the only time that she has with you isn't just at bedtime when you're trying to get her to go to bed. Have you been able to do that, and has it—do you think that's been helping?Joanna: Yeah. It depends. Like, we had a really busy weekend this past weekend, so not as much. And then I find that sometimes, like, a barrier to that is, like, by the time the weekend finally comes, I'm so depleted and really just, like, needing time for myself. As much as I'm like, “Okay, I need to spend one-on-one time with her,” I'm like, “I don't want to—I just, like, be by myself for a little while.” So it's—Sarah: I hear that.Joanna: It's always that—like, yeah, it's always that balancing act. And then, like, feeling guilty of, like, “Okay, no, I know I should want to hang out with her,” and I kind of just don't really.Sarah: Mm-hmm. No, you're—you're totally not alone. And it's funny that you just—you mentioned self-compassion and then you said, “I feel guilty 'cause I—I don't wanna hang out with her,” but we all—the theme so far in this five minutes is that, um, you know, what you're bringing to the—what you're bringing to the relationship has been improving. Like you said, your mindset has shifted, and that's helping things with her. So even if you're not getting time independently with her—and hopefully you can work towards that after you fill your own cup—but you're still helping things with her by getting time to yourself.Joanna: True. Yeah, because then I'm coming back just a much better, happier—yes—parent and person.Sarah: Totally.Joanna: Oh, thank you. That's helpful.Sarah: Yeah, and the—and I think you've—you know, you've touched—just in these few minutes—you've touched on two big things that I always say: if you can't really take these two things to heart, it'll be really hard to be a successful peaceful parent. And one is what you said—the mindset shift, you know, of how you see her behavior with, you know, that children are doing the best they can. You know, they're not giving us a hard time; they're having a hard time. And the other one is self-compassion. So making strides in both of those areas will really help you be that parent that you wanna be.Joanna: Yeah. And even though we're maybe not getting huge chunks of time individually, I am really trying to make the most of, like, those little moments—Sarah: Good.Joanna: —of connection. Yeah. So even, like—what we've started doing is, because my husband's on night shift, he is waking up with her in the morning because she has a really hard time in the morning. So now he's sort of with her, getting her ready in the morning. And then I am—like, we used to all walk to the bus together because my son likes to go too. But now my husband's hanging back with my son, so now I'm just walking her to the bus. And even though it's five minutes, it's like we're holding hands. She's able to tell me—Sarah: Yeah.Joanna: —you know, talking about whatever.Sarah: That's still—that—that totally counts. That's—and that also, um, that also takes care of something we talked about last time too, which is your husband and your son having more time together, um, so that the nights that—when your husband is home—maybe he can put your son to bed and start trying to shift that dynamic. So yeah. That's amazing that you're doing—that. Yeah, I think that's a great shift—walking to her—to the bus by herself.Joanna: And I think it—it actually makes a huge difference. You know, before it was like she would just kind of get on the bus and not really look back, and now she's, like, giving me a hug and a kiss and waving—Sarah: Mm-hmm.Joanna: —waving in the window. So, like, I can see that it's having a positive effect right away.Sarah: You could even leave five minutes earlier than you have to and have—turn that five minutes into ten minutes.Joanna: I would love to do that. It's always just—like, it's really hard to get to the bus on time as it is. We will work toward that though.Sarah: I hear that. Well, if you did try to leave five minutes earlier then it might be more relaxed, even if you didn't even have any extra time, but you were just, like—leave, you know, change your whole morning back five minutes and try to get out five minutes early.Joanna: Yeah. Yeah. True. So I think that we had talked a lot about roughhousing last time too—Sarah: Mm-hmm.Joanna: —and I do find that that's—that's really—it works well for her, but I run into this really specific problem where when, uh, like, we start roughhousing, and then she's enjoying it, but then my son wants to get in the mix—Sarah: Mm-hmm.Joanna: —and then right away she's like, “No, like, get outta here.” So then she'll start kind of, like, pushing him or, like, throwing kicks or something. So—and then he gets upset because he's like, “Mom! Mom!” So then I end up sort of, like, pinned underneath both of them—Sarah: Right.Joanna: —they're mad at each other, hitting each other—Sarah: Oh no.Joanna: —they both want me.Sarah: Well, maybe—maybe don't do it then if that's how it ends up. But I do have a couple of shifts that might help before you give up on it when you're alone with them. One is, do you ever try to do those “two against you”? Like, start it out right from the get-go—“You two against Mommy. See if you can—see if you can—” Um, it's funny you just said you end up pinned down because that's what I often say. Like, “See if you can stop Mommy from getting up,” or “See if you can catch me,” or, you know, trying to align the two of them against you. That might help.Joanna: Yeah, I love that idea. Never thought about that. Yeah, I think she would love that.Sarah: Yeah. So, “Okay, you two are a team, and you have to try to stop me from jumping on the bed,” or “You know, you—you have to stop me from getting to the bed,” or, you know, something like that.Joanna: Okay, I'm gonna try that. I think that they'll love it.Sarah: Yeah. Another idea is, um, what I call “mental roughhousing,” where you're not doing, like, physical stuff, but you're being silly and, like, um—I think I mentioned her last time to you, but A Playful Heart Parenting—Mia—W—Walinski. She has a lot of great ideas on her Instagram—we'll link to that in the show notes—of, like, different, um, like, word things that you can do. When I say mental roughhousing, it's like getting everyone laughing without being physical.Joanna: Mm-hmm.Sarah: Uh, which—you know, the goal of roughhousing is to get everyone laughing, and sometimes being physical might not work. But you can—like, I'll give you an idea. This isn't from Mia, but this is something that I used to do with my kids. Like, you know, one of you—you're like—you say to JR, “Oh—where did your sister go?” And she's sitting right there. “She was just here a minute ago. Where did Jay go? I don't see her. What happened to her? She disappeared.” And meanwhile she's like, “I'm right here! I'm right here!” You know—something like that that's more of, like, a—more of a mental roughhousing.My kids and I used to play this game that actually my brother-in-law invented called Slam, where, like, you both say a word at the same time. Um, so, like—I'm just looking around my—like, you know, “curtain” and, you know, “lemonade.” Uh, and then it's like—you both say it—both—you both say your word at the same time. And that actually wasn't a very funny one—kids come up with much funnier ones than I do—but it's like, “Is that, like, a lemonade that is made out of curtains, or is it a—what—” It's such a dumb example now that I think of it, but—but—or is it, like, a curtain that hides the lemonade? And so you just try and—like, you think of silly things that the two words together—the two words “slam” together—mean.Joanna: Okay, great. That's—that's on my next book—that's on my next thing to read. You—man—you keep mentioning—what is it? Playful—Playful Heart Parenting? She has an—I—Sarah: There was a book—there was a book too. And—Joanna: Oh—Sarah: Playful Parenting—the Larry Cohen book.Joanna: The Larry Cohen book, yeah.Sarah: Yeah.Joanna: Yeah.Sarah: That's a great book. Yeah, and he was on my podcast too, so you could listen to that. We'll also link to—Mia was on my podcast, and Larry was—so we'll link to both of those in the show notes as well.Joanna: Okay, great. I may have listened to one of those, but—yeah. Okay. Yeah.Sarah: And Playful Parenting is really great for also talking—and, like, Mia is just straight up, like, how to be more playful in life and to, you know, make more joy in your family kind of thing. And Larry talks about how to be more playful to also support your child through transitions and through big emotions and different things—like, it's a—it's a little bit more, um, like, all-around parenting—Playful Parenting.Joanna: Okay.Sarah: But it is different.Joanna: Yeah. I used to have a really hard time getting the kids upstairs to start the bedtime routine. And now it's like—I'll be like, “Okay, I'm gonna hide first,” and, like, I go upstairs and hide and we start—Sarah: Oh, I love that.Joanna: —we play hide-and-seek, and—Sarah: Oh yeah, it was a stroke of genius one day, and it's been working so well just to get everyone, like, off the main floor and—Joanna: —upstairs.Sarah: I'm gonna totally steal that idea. That's such a good idea. Yeah, because you could also send them up—“Okay, go hide upstairs and I'll come and find you.” And then you could do a round of you hiding. And I love that. That's a great idea. Yeah.Joanna: And I especially love hide-and-seek for sometimes when I need, like, 30 seconds by myself in a dark closet—Sarah: —to, like, take a breath.Joanna: That's great.Sarah: I love it. I love it. Yeah, it's—that's so great.As I mentioned before, I forgot to ask Joanna for an update about a few things. So here's the update about breastfeeding her son in the night.Sarah: Okay.Joanna: Hi, Sarah. So, in terms of the night-weaning, um, I haven't gone ahead and done anything about that yet just because he does have his last molars coming in and has been sick. So I want to wait until he's well and pain-free to kind of give us our best chance at getting that off on the right foot. But I have really realized that because he's my last baby, that this is really the last little home stretch of being woken up by a baby at night—specifically to nurse. So that's helped me kind of reduce my feelings of resentment toward it.Sarah: I love that Joanna zoomed out and looked at the big picture and the fact that this is her last baby, and used that to sort of just change her mindset a little bit and make it a little bit easier to continue on with something when she knew it wasn't the right time to stop. And now here is her update about bedtime with her daughter. And for this, I love that she got preventive—you'll see what I mean—and also playful. Those are two really great things to look at when you're having any struggles with your kids: like, how can I prevent this from happening? And also, how can I be playful when it is happening and shift the mood?Joanna: And in terms of bedtime with my daughter, we've made a couple of schedule changes to set us off on a better foot once I get back together with her after putting my son to bed. So I think we used to have a lot of conflict because it was like she was still asking for another snack and then hadn't brushed her teeth, and then it was just kind of getting to be too late and I was getting short on patience. So now we have, like, a set snack time where everybody has a snack, and I let them know, like, “This is the last time that we're eating today,” and then we're going upstairs—using hide-and-seek, like I mentioned—and then just really continuing to be playful in all doing our bedtime tasks together.So, for example, I'm saying, like, “Okay, I'm gonna go into my room and put my pajamas on. Can you guys go get your PJs on—and then don't show me, but I have to guess what pajamas you have on?” So she really loves that because, like I mentioned, she loves to get me to guess things. But also she's then helping her brother get ready for bed, and he's far more cooperative with her than with me in terms of getting his pajamas on. So it all works really well.Yeah, and then just kind of continuing to be silly and playful is really helping with brushing teeth—it's like, “Who can make the silliest faces in the mirror?” and stuff. So, really kind of moving through all those tasks together so that by the time I'm out of the room and ready to put her to bed, everything's done, and we can just get into playing cards and then snuggling and chatting and—and leaving from there after maybe a five- or ten-minute snuggle. So there's been way fewer meltdowns at the end of the night because we are able to just not get in this place where we're getting into power struggles in the first place. It's just really all about, like, the love and connection at the end of the day.Sarah: The final thing I wanted to check in with you about is—you were asking about the meltdowns. You know, when Jay gets really upset and, you know, how to—um—how to manage those. Have you had any chances to practice what we talked about with that?Joanna: Yeah, she actually had a really, really big, long, extended meltdown yesterday, and, um, I just continue to not really feel like I'm ever supporting her in the way that she needs supporting. Like, I don't—I always end up feeling like I'm not—I'm not helping. I don't know. It's just a really, really hard situation.Sarah: I was just talking to a client yesterday who—who actually wanted to know about supporting her child through meltdowns, and I said, “Well, what would you want someone to do for you?” You know—just kind of be there. Be quiet. You know, offer a—you know, rub the—rub your back—rub her back. I mean, I don't know exactly what your child wants, but I think that's a good place to start if you feel like you're not being successful—like, “Well, what would I want if this was happening to me?”Joanna: And I think that really—that's enough, right? It's enough—Sarah: Oh, totally.Joanna: —to be there. And it always—maybe I'm just feeling like it's not enough because we don't really even get, like, a good resolution, or, like, even—eventually it just kind of subsides, right?Sarah: If you were having a meltdown, that's what would happen. Nobody can come in there and fix it for you.Joanna: Um, exactly.Sarah: Nobody can come in and say the magic words that's gonna make you not feel upset anymore. So it's really just about that—being there for somebody. And we're—it's not that the resolution is “I fixed their problems.”Joanna: Yeah.Sarah: The resolution is “I was there with them for the journey.”Joanna: Yeah. And it goes back to what you were saying, where it's like, “Oh, this work really is just about me.”Sarah: Yeah, totally.Joanna: And learning how to show up.Sarah: And not feeling anxious when your child is upset and you're like, “I don't know what to do,” and just think, “Okay, I just have to be

Today, Natalie has the privilege of hosting Mia Wisinski. They discuss how to process emotions and connect with your children in a way that helps you both regulate your emotions while having fun and creating joyful experiences together. Mia is the heart behind Playful Heart Parenting — a mom and stepmom whose background in theatre and songwriting as a performer and educator deeply shapes her approach to parenting. Her style is rooted in connection, creativity, and a whole lot of laughter.Though Mia carried her playful spirit into adulthood, it took a hit when she unexpectedly became a stepmom and felt immense pressure to “get it right.” That moment kicked off an eight-year journey of reclaiming playfulness — a journey that's since helped hundreds of thousands of parents do the same.Today, she helps parents reconnect with their kids (and themselves) through simple, silly moments of play. Above all, Mia believes we all deserve joy and that playfulness is one of the most overlooked — and most powerful — tools in the positive parenting toolbox.Mia's methods for working through challenging situations with your kids are both enjoyable and refreshing! You are sure to love and laugh through this episode!Natalie invites you to listen in and stay for this journey.Please like, subscribe, rate, review, and share so we can help other mamas who are feeling stuck in their anger and burnout find joy in their motherhood journey!Find Mia at: Instagram: @playfulheartparentingSponsor:The Summer Motherhood Restored Group Coaching program is open for enrollment!Equip yourself for the busy school year with a new mindset! YES! You, me, the Lord, and a few other mamas are going to work together to help you change destructive patterns into healthy patterns so you can take a deep breath and actually ENJOY being a wife and mama!The Motherhood Restored Program - Next Group Start July 7, 2025! Apply HERE!Questions, thoughts, feedback? Send me a text!Connect with Natalie: Natalie's Website: nataliehixson.comInstagram: instagram.com/angrymamacoachPinterest: pinterest.com/nataliehixsonYouTube: @angrymamacoachAcknowledgements: Producer and editor: Skye Hixson Music: Simon Reid www.simonreidmusic.com

Play is more than just a way to pass the time- it's how kids learn, connect, and thrive. But for many parents, knowing how to “play right” with their kids can feel confusing, exhausting, or even a little overwhelming. In this episode, I sit down with Jill Lerman, a play and parenting coach, early childhood educator, and mom, to explore the true power of play and why it doesn't need to be Pinterest-perfect to be effective. We unpack the misconceptions around play, how to shift from being your child's entertainer to becoming their facilitator, and why independent play is one of the greatest gifts you can give your child (and yourself). Jill also shares how play builds emotional regulation, frustration tolerance, creativity, and real-world problem-solving skills. From playroom setups to screen time detox strategies, this episode is packed with practical, empowering tips to help you bring more joy and ease into your parenting through the power of play. To find out more about Jill, check out her links:  Website Podcast Free Guide to Independent Play At Any Age VIPs (Very Important Parents) Schedule a Free Coaching Call Now! Essential Minute: Citrus Bliss

This episode of The Peaceful Parenting Podcast is a conversation with Mia Wisinski from the popular social media account, Playful Heart Parenting. We discuss why being playful needs to be woven into your daily life with your kids and not as a tactic to get their cooperation, what makes it hard to be playful, and lots of tips and tricks to start being more silly today!   We talk about: 4:00 Why does play sometimes backfire when you use it to try to get through the schedule? 7:00 How to be more intentional about play and fun 10:00 Changing your way of being with your children 13:00 How sexism shows up in our attitudes and ability to access our playful sides 17:00 How we are “weaned off” of play in our society 23:00 How to start getting playful and silly again 33:00 How games can help with specific challenges with your kids 41:00 How to not use play in a manipulative way   Download the episode transcript HERE    Resources mentioned in this episode: Playful Parenting with Lawrence Cohen: Episode 103 https://reimaginepeacefulparenting.com/episode103/  Mia Wisinski @playfulheartparenting on IG https://playfulheartparenting.com/    Connect with Sarah Rosensweet:   Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/sarahrosensweet/  Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/peacefulparentingfreegroup YouTube: Peaceful Parenting with Sarah Rosensweet @peacefulparentingwithsarah4194 Website: https://reimaginepeacefulparenting.com   Join us on Patreon: www.patreon.com/peacefulparenting  Newsletter: https://reimaginepeacefulparenting.com/newsletter  Book a short consult or coaching session call: https://book-with-sarah-rosensweet.as.me/schedule.php   

Co-host Sue Marriott, with special guests, Tina Payne Bryson and Georgie Wisen-Vincent, discuss the powerful role of play in child development and its therapeutic benefits. Play fosters emotional resilience, strengthens parent-child attachment, and supports positive neuroplasticity. They acknowledge the resistance some parents may feel towards engaging in play, while also providing practical strategies for parents to incorporate into their daily interactions. Learn how embracing play can nurture emotional growth and empower both children and parents in meaningful ways.

This episode of The Peaceful Parenting Podcast is a coaching call with single parent Haley of a 4.5 year-old. Haley is brand new to Peaceful Parenting and we cover why she wants to parent this way and how to go about implementing it- especially when the people in her life are using a more conventional parenting approach. We talk about: 3:30 How to handle kids saying hurtful things to us 14:00 How to handle setting limits 19:00 Comparing different parenting styles 28:00 How to respond to our kids without shaming them 35:00 How to handle other people's perspectives on our parenting 44:00 How to know what limits to set 50:00 Understanding our own triggers Download the episode transcript HERE  Resources mentioned in this episode: Transform Your Family Life Course https://reimaginepeacefulparenting.com/parenting-course Peaceful Parenting Membership https://reimaginepeacefulparenting.com/membership  Free How to Stop Yelling at Your Kids Course https://reimaginepeacefulparenting.com/resources  Connect with Sarah Rosensweet:   Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/sarahrosensweet/  Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/peacefulparentingfreegroup YouTube: Peaceful Parenting with Sarah Rosensweet @peacefulparentingwithsarah4194 Website: https://reimaginepeacefulparenting.com   Join us on Patreon: www.patreon.com/peacefulparenting  Newsletter: https://reimaginepeacefulparenting.com/newsletter Book a short consult or coaching session call: https://book-with-sarah-rosensweet.as.me/schedule.php 

In this episode, we're joined by Dr. Tina Payne Bryson, renowned parenting expert, to explore the power of play in child development and its role in fostering emotional and mental well-being. She shares practical tips for parents, including how to use play therapy to support anxious children, handle mom guilt, and create a screen-free, connection-focused environment at home. Dr. Bryson also discusses strategies for managing separation anxiety, cultivating playful parenting, and prioritizing quality time with your kids—even for busy working parents. Whether you're navigating the challenges of modern parenting or seeking deeper insights into child development, this conversation offers valuable advice you won't want to miss.Sponsored By:Be Well By Kelly Protein Powder & Essentials | Get $10 off your order with PODCAST10 at bewellbykelly.com.AG1 | Get a FREE 1-year supply of Vitamin D3+K2 AND 5 free AG1 Travel Packs with your first subscription at drinkAG1.com/bewell. Hiya Health | Get 50% off your first order at HiyaHealth.com/Kelly and give your kids the full-body nourishment they need to grow into healthy, happy adults.OneSkin | Get 15% off OneSkin with the code BEWELL at oneskin.coTimestamps:00:00:00 - Introduction 00:02:04 - The WHY behind the work 00:04:56 - Child led play therapy 00:10:09 - Play therapy tips for parents 00:11:53 - Kelly's experience with her children 00:18:04 - Child development 00:21:52 - Understanding anxious children 00:25:34 - Play strategy for anxious children 00:28:32 - Separation anxiety 00:30:28 - Playfulness is safety 00:33:15 - Advice for working parents 00:38:06 - Handling mom guilt 00:43:33 - Playful parenting strategies 00:48:02 - Make yourself a mirror 00:49:21 - Staying off your phone 00:54:15 - Making someone feel like a priority 01:00:30 - Narrate to integrate 01:03:22 - Childhood memories 01:05:55 - When kids are mean 01:09:43 - Where to find Dr. Tina Bryson Show Links: Aro BoxCheck Out Dr. Tina Bryson:BookInstagram Website Check Out Kelly Leveque:InstagramYouTubeFacebookMentioned in this episode:Hiya Health | Get 50% off your first order at HiyaHealth.com/Kelly.

This episode of The Peaceful Parenting Podcast is a conversation Georgie Wisen- Vincent a play therapy expert and co-author of the new book The Way of Play with Tina Payne-Bryson. We cover the importance of play for teaching children skills and understanding their feelings, and tangible ways that parents can join their kids in the world of play (even if they don't really like playing!). We talk about: 7:25 What does it mean to “observe and attune” to our kids? 12:22 How play helps children learn to manage their feelings without having an actual fight or flight stress response 23:00 Why kids tell us we are playing wrong! 28:00 Why it is okay to let kids have control and power in play 29:00 The “think out loud” strategy 33:00 How much should we be playing with our kids? 36:25 How play helps with resiliency  Download the episode transcript HERE    Resources mentioned in this episode: The Way of Play https://amzn.to/3PrAm6D  https://playstronginstitute.com/   Connect with Sarah Rosensweet:   Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/sarahrosensweet/  Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/peacefulparentingfreegroup YouTube: Peaceful Parenting with Sarah Rosensweet @peacefulparentingwithsarah4194 Website: https://reimaginepeacefulparenting.com   Join us on Patreon: www.patreon.com/peacefulparenting  Newsletter: https://reimaginepeacefulparenting.com/newsletter  Book a short consult or coaching session call: https://book-with-sarah-rosensweet.as.me/schedule.php   

In this engaging conversation, I interview the owner of Playful Heart Parenting, Mia Wisinski. She discusses  the transformative power of playfulness in parenting. Mia shares her journey of founding Playful Heart Parenting, emphasizing the importance of silliness and creativity in family life. She discusses various techniques, such as storytelling and improv games, that can help parents connect with their children and alleviate stress. The conversation also addresses the challenges of motherhood, including overstimulation and burnout, and offers practical advice for incorporating playfulness into daily routines. In this conversation, Mia discusses the significance of playfulness in parenting, emphasizing that laughter and silliness are essential not only for children but also for parents. She shares personal anecdotes and practical tips for incorporating play into daily routines, highlighting the emotional benefits of such interactions. The discussion also touches on research supporting playful parenting and the impact it has on family dynamics. Mia offers resources and tools for parents looking to embrace a more playful approach.Mia's Info Below:IG:https://www.instagram.com/playfulheartparenting?igsh=NTc4MTIwNjQ2YQ==Join Mia's Weekly Newsletter:https://playfulheartparenting.kit.com/profileLittle Moments for Big Laughs:https://playfulheartparenting.kit.com/0b78fc669cBooks referenced:"Playful Parenting" by LawrenceCohen "Attachment Play" by Aletha SolterAs always, if you like my show please leave a review! You can connect with me below! I would love to hear from you!SOCIALS: IG: Heygirlhey_withbecca TikTok: Heygirlheyp0dcastCONNECT WITH ME:E-mail: Heygirlheywithbecca@gmail.com"Girl, You Got This Affirmation" Deck for sale! More Info on IG for purchase!Swag available: "A Mom Tribe is a Vibe" tote bags! DM or email me for more information! 

In Episode 136, Kyle and Sara, LPC's, interview Dr. Larry Cohen the author of the books Playful Parenting and Opposite of Worry. He is the creator of the Playful Parenting approach. We discuss how challenging play actually can be for parents. He shares his own love/hate relationship with play. Why is play so important and how can it help parents more deeply connect and understand their children? What are some of the ways parents misunderstand play? Play can be such a powerful tool for dads to use to teach their children about aggression and boundaries. Play needs to be a part of every family's daily life and after this episode, parents will know how to be more intentional with their play. Get our video courses at https://art-of-raising-humans.newzenler.com.View the full podcast transcript at: https://www.artofraisinghumans.com/how-to-become-a-more-playful-parent-with-doctor-larry-cohenVisit our website and social media channels for more valuable content for your parenting journey.Resource Website: https://www.artofraisinghumans.comVideo Courses: https://art-of-raising-humans.newzenler.com/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/artofraisinghumansInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/artofraisinghumansPodcast Website: https://www.theartofraisinghumans.comThe Art of Raising Humans podcast should not be considered or used as counseling but for educational purposes only.

Jill is a stay-at-home mom and playful parenting coach for her 3.5-year-old daughter. Jill, her husband, and daughter live in an apartment in Jersey City. Jill's daughter started pre-school this year, which has switched up their daily routine. Her husband works hybrid so they also enjoy lots of family time on his remote work days. Check out Jill's website www.jillybeansnyc.com to learn more about how to work with her 1:1, join her monthly Playful Parenting membership, or listen to her podcast, The Art of Playful Parenting. Ready to see more independent play? This free resource that will help you get more time back for yourself while your child is learning and playing independently. https://jillybeans-nyc.ck.page/0d7fab4ab9 Connect with Jill on instagram: www.instagram.com/jillybeansnyc Contact us: Everydayparentspod.com;  Patreon.com/everydayparentspod Instagram @everyda yparentspod; facebook.com/everydayparentspod;  Podcast is hosted and produced by Jerome Kluck and Caitlin Kirby. Music is ‘Ukulele Fun Background' and ‘Funny Story' by Pavel Yudin.

Welcome back to another episode of Playfully Faithful Parenting with your host, Joy Wendling. Today, we're diving into the often misunderstood role of play in discipline. Many parents perceive play as inappropriate during moments of misbehavior or power struggles. But what if there's a better way? Drawing insights from Lawrence Cohen's "Playful Parenting" and Jim and Lynn Jackson's "Discipline That Connects With Your Child's Heart," Joy explores how playful discipline can transform power struggles into opportunities for connection and growth. Discover why play is not a reward but a powerful tool to reinforce love, understanding, and the fruit of the Spirit in your parenting journey. Let's redefine discipline together and see how you can be equipped to handle those challenging moments with grace and playfulness.  You've got the Holy Spirit! You can do it, mama! Links: (This may contain some affiliate links, which means I receive a small commission, at no extra cost to you, if you make a purchase using these links. For more information, please see my disclosure policy.) Register for the Discipline that Connects with Your Child's Heart Online Workshop: createdtoplay.com/dtcworkshop Want more personalized help with discipline? Join my monthly Membership : https://createdtoplay.com/joinmembership Printables Membership: https://createdtoplay.com/printablesmembership Free Consult Call: https://createdtoplay.com/free-coaching Facebook Group: http://createdtoplay.com/community Discipline that Connects with Your Child's Heart book: https://amzn.to/3XzP54s Playful Parenting book: https://amzn.to/4cRw5Tr Blog on the topic:  https://www.patheos.com/blogs/parentingwithjoy/2024/07/power-struggles/ Playfully Faithful Parenting Podcast is a ministry of CreatedtoPlay.com. For more resources, tips, devotions, and tools check us out online: https://createdtoplay.com . Freebies for you: Want to work with me? Sign up for a 15-minute free coaching call: https://createdtoplay.com/free-coaching Free Bible Study on 3 Traits of God to Guide Your Discipline: https://createdtoplay.com/freebiblestudy Join my free 5-day Bible Play Challenge:  https://createdtoplay.com/challenge Get 17 fun, free kid's blessings for meals: https://createdtoplay.com/kids-blessings Even though I'm an introvert, I'm social!  Let's connect! Instagram: https://instagram.com/createdtoplay Facebook: https://facebook.com/created2play Pinterest: https://pinterest.com/createdtoplay Are you looking for a speaker for your next women's, parenting, family, or Children's Ministry event? I'm now booking for 2024. I'm available for virtual and live conferences, brunches, MOPS meetings, retreats, trainings, and more. More details and sample video here: createdtoplay.com/speaking Did you enjoy the show? Subscribe and leave me a 5-star review on Apple Music and make me giddy. Music by jorikbasov from Pixabay.

My client Jill Lerman is a gift to moms everywhere. Especially those who want to gift their kiddos the ability to engage themselves in self-directed play as soon as possible, and as developmentally appropriate as possible as well. Luckily, Jill happens to be an expert in this area. She helps overwhelmed parents & caretakers to connect and engage with their little ones through simple invitations to play to help make parenting feel more joyful and manageable.   We had an amazing conversation around how working together we created a business plan that felt doable as a mom to a young daughter herself and how encouraging independent play has helped her work from home and be a mindful mama as she does so and some tips for you to do the same.   Featured on the podcast: Check out Jill's own podcast here and her website where you can learn how to work with her one on one, or join her monthly Playful Parenting membership. https://www.jillybeansnyc.com/ Grab Jill's free guide on how to create more independent play in your child's world too here. Want to work with me as your private coach too? Learn more and apply here.    Like the show? Leave a review here. And a great way to not miss an episode is to subscribe to the show while you're at it

In this episode, we delve into the how-to's of playing with your baby, guided by expert advice from Autumn McKay, founder of Best Mom Ideas. As parents, understanding how to effectively engage with our little ones during the infant/toddler years is paramount. We explore three key points that shed light on nurturing your child's development through play, ending with suggestions on how you can learn from Ms Rachel, the YouTube phenomenon that's got babies mesmerized! Topics Discussed: Creating Opportunities to Learn Connecting Emotionally with Your Child Screen Time, Learning and Ms Rachel Here's the show notes where you'll find a link for Autumn's free gift, The Ultimate Mom-Saver Activity Bundle! --- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/ann-mckitrick/support

Chapter 1 What's Playful Parenting Book by Lawrence J. CohenPlayful Parenting is a book written by Lawrence J. Cohen. It was published in 2001 and provides a guide for parents on how to engage in playful interactions with their children in order to strengthen their relationship, promote emotional well-being, and resolve conflicts. The book emphasizes the importance of laughter and playfulness in parenting, and provides practical tips and strategies for incorporating play into everyday activities.Chapter 2 Is Playful Parenting Book A Good BookPlayful Parenting by Lawrence J. Cohen is generally well-regarded and has received positive reviews from many readers. It offers insights and practical advice on using play to build deeper connections and improve communication with your children. The book focuses on encouraging playfulness, empathy, and active listening to strengthen the parent-child relationship. However, personal preferences may vary, so it's worth reading reviews, checking its summary, and considering your own parenting style and goals before deciding if it suits your needs.Chapter 3 Playful Parenting Book by Lawrence J. Cohen SummaryPlayful Parenting is a book by Lawrence J. Cohen that emphasizes the importance of incorporating play into parenting for effective communication and building healthy relationships with children. The book provides various strategies and techniques to help parents create a playful atmosphere at home, where children feel understood, validated, and loved.The main theme of the book is that playing with our children is not just about having fun, but also a powerful tool for building connection, resolving conflicts, and teaching important life skills. Cohen argues that play allows children to feel safe, express their emotions, and develop social and problem-solving skills. By engaging in various forms of play, parents can effectively communicate with their children, build trust, and foster a positive parent-child relationship.The book introduces different types of play, including physical play, imaginative play, and emotional play, and provides practical advice on how to incorporate them into daily routines. Cohen suggests that parents should actively listen to their child's emotions during play and use it as an opportunity to empathize and validate their feelings. By actively participating in their child's play, parents can also balance their authority and create a sense of equality within the parent-child dynamic.Additionally, Playful Parenting addresses common parenting challenges such as tantrums, power struggles, and discipline issues. Cohen offers playful alternatives to conventional discipline methods, encouraging parents to approach these situations with empathy, creativity, and a sense of humor. Through playful interventions, parents can guide their children towards positive behaviors and problem-solving techniques, rather than resorting to punitive measures.Overall, Playful Parenting emphasizes the importance of play in parenting and provides practical guidance for parents to create a more playful and connected relationship with their children. It encourages parents to view play as a valuable tool for communication, problem-solving, and emotional development, allowing both parents and children to enjoy a more joyful and fulfilling parenting experience. Chapter 4 Playful Parenting Book AuthorLawrence J. Cohen is a clinical psychologist and author specializing in children's play and parenting. He is best known for his book "Playful Parenting," which provides techniques and ideas to help parents use playfulness to connect with their children and resolve conflicts. The book was first published in 2001.In...

This week, I chat with Certified Emotional Freedom Coach, Sophie Hale from Liverpool, UK! We discuss the importance of finding time for mom to regulate her emotions, EFT tapping, having babies during COVID and why she is now on her 4th TV in under 4 months! As a certified emotional freedom coach, Sophie helps mums build unshakeable confidence and find freedom from challenging emotions like stress, anxiety and insecurity through somatic tools like EFT tapping, cyclical living and PLAY. https://www.instagram.com/thesophiehale/

Wise and gentle Lelia Schott is here to honor our children and nurture us into neuro emotional awareness and healing for general life sustainability and parenting impact.  As she states, “connection is a child's deepest need and a parent's highest influence.”  AHHH. You know I love her.  Lelia deeply understands the neuroscience behind our humanness, and like me, prioritizes everyone's experience so that we can actually implement and embody the healthy ways we're trying to treat our children. This is a nice long back and forth conversation between us where we impart the knowledge that we have gained in our own healing journeys and how we've grown alongside our children. As you start to immerse yourself in these new concepts, this is the perfect way to marinate in these ideas with yumminess of our accountability, reflections and “me too-ness.” Lelia is a South African mama of 6 who does 1-on-1 Coaching with parents all over the world, and also has a Course Offering called The Empowered Parenting Course where she covers topics such as Making Sense of Attachment and Nervous System Science, Anger and Healthy Aggression (YAS!), Playful Parenting and Storytelling and Your Personal Transformation. I so align with all that she focuses on, and in the gentle nurturing way that she does and I trust that you will too. Enjoy! If you'd like to connect with Lelia and her work her IG is: https://www.instagram.com/leliaschott_synergyparenting And if you'd like to connect with me and my work you can find me on IG: @the.reprogrammed.parent or my website, annodom.org

Do you feel like parenting has become so serious, it's difficult to enjoy the ride and have fun?! Do you want to get away from always checking items off your never-ending to-do list?! Do you want to enjoy a happier home, full of conversation and laughter?! This episode is for you!  In this episode, we'll discuss a few real-life examples that you can incorporate into your life now, and start having FUN as a parent again! ******** Join my community: Working Mom Moments Facebook Group Get the latest - Email Newsletter: www.lacyjungman.com/insider  Connect with me: info@lacyjungman.com  Follow me on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/lacyjungman/  If you're ready to create the work life blend you've always dreamed of, I'm here for you! Grab my podcast special here, which includes one-on-one session with me at a reduced cost! 

Playfulness, as we all know, is something that comes really easily and naturally to our children. It seems like they could turn any object into a toy. They can turn the most boring thing into a game, but it does not come so easily to us parents. Our lives are serious and stressful, and we often don't have the time or the capacity to be playful.It's hard to be playful when you're thinking about all the tragic world events that are going on right now, or when you're preoccupied by a work email, or even what's for dinner. So what can we we do to be there for our children, by being playful?------Sign up for the Parenting Translator Substack, and follow along on Instagram.Parenting Translator is hosted by Dr. Cara Goodwin and is produced by Earfluence.Dr. Cara Goodwin, Ph.D., is a child psychologist and mother to three children who "translates" research on parenting and child development into information that is accurate, relevant, and useful to parents.

Why should play be a vital aspect of both children's and adults' lives? Laura Haver, a champion of play and author of the book Play Together, discusses her passion for integrating play into daily life and the transformative effects it can bring. Join us as we uncover the power of play, a tool that can decrease stress, enhance relationships, boost communication, and ignite creativity.Laura opens up about her journey from the digital marketing space to beach tennis pro to advocating and promoting play. She reveals the influences of her time as a tennis coach and participating in the Pro Beach Tennis World Tour in shaping her views on playful parenting. Listen to her transformative experiences and insights on embracing passion and uncovering opportunities for play in everyday life with fun games for the whole family. We explore the importance of fostering creativity, connection, and mindfulness through games. Laura shares more about her book, Play Together, which is designed to nurture creativity, connection, and mindfulness without relying on screens. Tune in for a lively discussion on embracing the joy and benefits of play!(0:00:18) - Power of Play and New BookLaura Haver discusses the power of play to increase creativity, connection, and mindfulness without screens, and its importance for adults, families, and children.(0:06:28) - The Power of Play and MindfulnessPlay and mindfulness can reduce stress, strengthen relationships, improve communication, and increase creativity and innovation.(0:11:18) - Power of Play, Creating Fun GamesFamily games reduce stress, strengthen relationships, improve communication, and increase connection.(0:19:14) - Transitioning CareersLaura shares her journey of discovering the power of play, her experience playing tennis, transitioning to a play advocate, and the benefits of playing together as a family.(0:28:11) - Promoting Creativity, Connection, and MindfulnessWe discuss family play, boosting creativity, connection, and mindfulness, reaching out to positive people.Support the showSupport the Playful Humans mission to help adults rediscover the power of play: Subscribe to the YouTube channel Subscribe to the Podcast Book a playshop for your team Support our sponsors

Meghan Englert is a therapist and a Playful Parenting Coach and she'll share what playful parenting is. Her tagline is, "Bond more battle less!"You will learn how to incorporate play into your parenting and why getting on the same page as parents is so powerful. Meghan shares stories and her journey towards a more peaceful family. You can find her at: MeghanEnglert.comHer Facebook Group: Judgement Free Parent ZoneFollow her on Instagram & Facebook

Tune in for a conversation with Meghan Englert, MFT, parent educator, facilitator and clinician, about strategies for raising children who thrive.

The beginning of the school year is filled with many conflicting emotions for both our kids and us as parents. In this episode we share favorite tips, ideas and traditions that will help you start the year off right and from a place of wholeness.  Related Episodes 207 // We Are All Good Inside: Parenting Without Using Shame and Repairing When We Do, with Dr. Becky Kennedy Part 1  210 // Navigating Tricky Transitions With Kids Ahead of Time and What to Do When Whining Feels Unbearable: Good Inside by Dr. Becky Kennedy Part 2  108 // Using Play to Diffuse Power Struggles and Connect With Your Child (based on Playful Parenting by Larence J. Cohen) 118 // Become a Child Whisperer / Parenting Your Kids True to Their Nature (based on the work of Carol Tuttle) Links Mentioned Weekly Clothes Organizer  Fave Books back to school Kissing hand by Audrey Pen I Love You All Day Long  by Francesca Rusackas Super Manny Stands up by Kelly DiPucchio  Oh the Places You'll Go by Dr. Seuss Time Stamps 12:25 - How to navigate the logistics of going back to school with systems 15:35 - Weekly Clothes Organizer 20:17 - Special back to school dinner with notes of encouragement from family 22:21 - Helping your kids emotionally return to school by addressing your own anxieties 25:21 - Emotional vaccination with your kids 27:24 - Visualizing mediation the night before 27:55 - Review the child whisperer to help your kids deal with the upcoming 31:42 - Reading a back to school book 34:19 - Making love bracelets 35:00 - First day special events --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/findthemagic/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/findthemagic/support

Have you ever tried to teach your kid a value? Or help them stop taking toys? Or handle a conflict within a friendship or with a sibling? As parents we have a (sometimes) underutilized tool that can help us in these situations: play. In this episode Katelin walks through how to use role playing specifically to help work through these situations with our children of all ages.  Related Episodes Using Play to Diffuse Power Struggles and Connect With Your Child (based on Playful Parenting by Lawrence J. Cohen) Books & Articles Mentioned 6 Steps To Do A Role Play Playful Parenting // Lawrence Cohen Thank you for the kind reviews! We appreciate them so much. Here is how to leave a review for us  on iTunes: Open Find the Magic in the podcast app   Scroll to the bottom of the page Click on write a review Tap the stars to rate us and then write us some feedback:) This podcast is my happy place I am SO grateful for the time and effort that goes into this podcast. Every episode is packed with gold. There is so much education and real conversations about life and motherhood. It helps to calm my soul, reassure me, motivate me and so much more. THANK YOU! --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/findthemagic/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/findthemagic/support

Have you been thinking of ways to bring a playful approach to raising your kids? I had a joy-filled chat with parenting coach, Joy Wendling!//Who is Joy?Joy Wendling is a writer, speaker, podcaster, certified parent coach, and founder of Created to Play. She has over 20 years of experience in children, youth, and family ministry, as well as a Masterʼs in Youth, Family, and Culture from Fuller Theological Seminary. Her idea of relaxing is gazing at mountains from her island home with an ice-cold Diet Coke and a good book. Joy lives in the Pacific Northwest and enjoys laughing and playing with her five daughters and husband. Get to know her better at CreatedtoPlay.com and on her podcast titled Playfully Faithful Parenting.--We talked about…✨What parent coaching is, how she got started in coaching, and how parents can know if this type of coaching is the best for them✨Ideas for practical tips and ways that parents get started playing with their kids✨How play can also be a way to both disciple and discipline children✨How we as parents can incorporate more play into our adult livesCheck out Joy's Website & Podcast: Listen to Playfully Faithful Parenting at https://createdtoplay.com////Mentioned on the show:My YouTube channel at MomZest (and how you can see this interview): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9vZdV6ICSDQ///☕Support this podcast with a one-time coffee or a monthly membership here: https://www.buymeacoffee.com/demetriazinga

In this episode, Lawrence Cohen joins me on the show to talk about how play and roughhousing can help you in your parenting. We talk about everything from why we need to be playful, to aggression, to calming our kids down, and incorporating more fun and play into our days. Lawrence J. Cohen, PhD, is a psychologist and the author of Playful Parenting and The Opposite of Worry. His newest book is Unplug and Play: The Illustrated Guide to Roughhousing with Your Kids, co-authored with Anthony Debenedet. We talk about: [5:50] How Lawrence got into this work, and about his new book [6:45] The importance of roughhousing  [8:15] How Lawrence became a more playful parent [11:15] Advice for parents who shy away from roughhousing and play [19:20] Having ‘personal agency' [21:20] Building self-determination of risk [25:45] The Knot of Tension concept [28:50] Handing unsavory behavior when it comes to play [35:00] Responding to aggression with playfulness [41:10] When ‘play' turns aggressive  [45:50] Tips for getting play to stop [49:35] What to do when your kid swears  [54:20] Lawrence's advice to his younger parent self    Resources mentioned in this episode: Free ‘How to Stop Yelling' Course: www.sarahrosensweet.com/yelling  Join us on Patreon: www.patreon.com/peacefulparenting  The Opposite of Worry by Lawrence Cohen: https://amzn.to/3LFgyLI Playful Parenting: https://amzn.to/427erpu Unplug and Play by Lawrence Cohen: https://amzn.to/3AJzByl   Connect with Lawrence Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/Larrycohenplayfulparenting/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/Larjack1 Website: www.playfulparenting.com    Connect with Sarah Rosensweet   Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/sarahrosensweet/  Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/peacefulparentingfreegroup Website: https://www.sarahrosensweet.com Book a short consult or coaching session call: https://book-with-sarah-rosensweet.as.me/schedule.php

As parents, we all want to provide the best possible environment for our children to grow and thrive. One of the most effective ways to achieve this is through playful parenting - using play as a means of building attachment and security, reducing stress and anxiety, and creating learning and practice opportunities. Join us as we dive deep with all the benefits of playful parenting. Please subscribe and visit us on our website community, and we look forward to reading your comments. ❤️

There is a lot of parenting advice out there and it can seem overwhelming to sift through. In this episode Felica breaks down her favorite steps to connecting to our child during recurrent misbehavior or unreasonable tantrums and a new way to see our kids during their hard moments. Related episodes: 207 // We Are All Good Inside: Parenting Without Using Shame and Repairing When We Do, with Dr. Becky Kennedy Part 1 210 // Navigating Tricky Transitions With Kids Ahead of Time and What to Do When Whining Feels Unbearable: Good Inside by Dr. Becky Kennedy Part 2 108 // Using Play to Diffuse Power Struggles and Connect With Your Child (based on Playful Parenting by Larence J. Cohen) 118 // Become a Child Whisperer / Parenting Your Kids True to Their Nature (based on the work of Carol Tuttle) Sponsor: GABB WIRELESS We LOVE devices that help our kids stay safe and be able to adventure while still being able to contact us safely and allow us to know where they are without being the kind of technology that steals their mental health and attention. Gabb wireless is an incredible company that we FULLY endorse for just that. Go to https://gabbwireless.com and use code FINDTHEMAGIC to get $50 off any device! Thank you for the kind reviews! We appreciate them so much. Here is how to leave a review for us on iTunes: Open Find the Magic in the podcast app Scroll to the bottom of the page Click on write a review Tap the stars to rate us and then write us some feedback:) Review of the week: So very helpful! I've been so thrilled with this podcast. It's been a huge help and has made me feel like I'm not alone in my challenges. You both are inspiring to me and helped me decide to learn to play the piano in the next 5 years after listening to your episode on a grown mindset. --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/findthemagic/support

Welcome back to our second "Modern Lady Throwback" episode! This week, we're pleased to re-release one of our favourite (and fan-favourite!) episodes from Season 2 entitled, "Playful Parenting"! This week: "When it comes to playing with our children, it seems we can sometimes be conflicted.  We may not always WANT to play house or to play with Legos... and so what do we do when those feelings of duty threaten to drown out the pleasure of spending time with our kids?  This week, the ladies discuss play as parents and share some of the childhood memories that inspire them to seek out ways to playfully parent their own crews today. *Stay tuned to the end of the episode for more memories & outtakes!*" (First aired: May 5, 2020)

In this podcast, Dr. Lawrence Cohen, psychologist, author, and consultant, speaks to the amazing benefits of roughhousing on children's physcial, psychological, and emotional development. Dr. Cohen explores how rough-and-tumble play can nurture close connections, solve behavior problems, boost confidence, and grow the brain in unimaginable ways. To learn more about the art of roughhousing, purchase Dr. Cohen's book here Want to learn more from Dr. Cohen? We have an incredible recorded workshop called "Playful Parenting" based on his best-selling book. Have you ever stepped back to watch what really goes on when your children play? In his course Dr. Cohen will help you understand that play is children's way of exploring the world, communicating deep feelings, getting close to those they care about, working through stressful situations, and simply blowing off steam. That's why “playful parenting” is so important and so successful in building strong, close bonds between parents and children.  Use code PLAYFUL30 to take 30% OFF https://instituteofchildpsychology.com/product/the-principles-of-playful-parenting/ You can also watch this workshop as part of our membership -- podcast listeners can take 40% OFF their annual membership (or $19.99/m). Get your 7-Day Free Trial today!  

Sign up for the email list to get the behind-the-scenes view.  https://www.subscribepage.com/kcmo Want to try a coaching call-- sign up for a free 30-minute call: https://calendly.com/christythomas/exploratory-call-free   GOOD ENOUGH MOM SOCIETY (christythomascoaching.com) You are exactly the right mom for your kids.  I am so glad to know you.    328. Rough Housing is Good! Lawrence J. Cohen, Ph.D., is the author of Playful Parenting, an award-winning book that has been translated into 18 languages. He is also the author of The Opposite of Worry, which addresses the anxieties and fears of children (and parents). Larry is also the co-author of two books on children's social development: Best Friends Worst Enemies and Mom They're Teasing Me. His most recent book, co-authored with Anthony DeBenedet, is Unplug and Play: The Ultimate Illustrated Guide to Roughhousing with Your Kids. Playfulparenting.com Email Larry@playfulparenting.com to get the newsletter.  https://www.psychologytoday.com/intl/blog/playful-parenting   Self-Care:  Larry does yoga and chi-gong.  His favorite 10-second self-care is called pat the baby.  Pretend you have a baby on your shoulder and pat the fussy baby.  Play: Rough House! Sit with your family in a circle, with all the feet towards each other.  Socks on, no shoes.  1-2-3- go.  Your goal is to keep the socks on your feet, get everyone else's socks off, and have fun!   Find me on Instagram:  Happiest Mom You Know (@everyday_runner_christy) • Instagram photos and videos Don't forget to leave a rating or review. Email me Play4life.Christy@gmail.com     

In this episode, Lian joins me for a coaching call to discuss the challenges she's facing with her four-year-old son.   Her son has been using swearing to communicate his frustration and big feelings. Lian also shares how his frustration often escalates from mean words to physical aggression.   I give her tips and strategies to help transform her son's approach and behavior, and we make a plan for Lian and her husband moving forward. Be sure to listen in until the end to hear our check in.   We go into: [0:50] What to do if your child uses profanity excessively  [3:50] How Lian has tried putting limits on this issue so far [6:10] Why we can't ignore troubling behavior [10:40] What to do if the behavior isn't due to lack of attention [12:50] The shame we feel as parents when our kids do something  humiliating  [18:10] The 'good' vs. 'bad' parent dichotomy [20:45] Why the naughty behavior hasn't crossed over into other areas of Lian's son life [23:50] How to handle your kid hitting you [30:45] Tips for helping your child empty their emotional backpack [36:05] How hard parenting really is on a marriage [38:00] Check in with Lian [42:15] Tips for empathizing with our kids [48:00] Keeping an aggression log [56:30] Why we should never ignore a child when they're upset Resources mentioned in this episode FREE How to Stop Yelling Course: www.sarahrosensweet.com/yelling  Book coaching or a free consult: www.sarahrosensweet.com/coaching  Patreon: www.patreon.com/peacefulparenting  Playful Parenting by Larry Cohen: https://amzn.to/3Dj49IY  Raising Human Beings by Ross Greene: https://amzn.to/3yvOgg6     Connect with Sarah Rosensweet   On Instagram On Facebook https://www.sarahrosensweet.com  Book a short consult or coaching session call

It's easy to keep our cool, accept our children for who they are, and hold boundaries with unconditional love when our kids are behaving well, but what about when their behavior scares us? What do we do when our kids lie? What about when they are feeling extra reserved and we worry they won't be able to navigate social situations? How do we handle when our kids are so easily frustrated for reasons we don't even understand (does it really matter how your socks line up with your heel? In this episode, we draw on Dr. Becky Kennedy's book Good Inside to address these issues. We share many ways of reframing these difficult situations in a way that really helps us as parents see things in a bit more clearly and patiently. Related episodes: 207 // We Are All Good Inside: Parenting Without Using Shame and Repairing When We Do, with Dr. Becky Kennedy Part 1 210 // Navigating Tricky Transitions With Kids Ahead of Time and What to Do When Whining Feels Unbearable: Good Inside by Dr. Becky Kennedy Part 2 202 // Facing Our Fear 203 // Meditation: Letting Fear Go 108 // Using Play to Diffuse Poser Struggles and Connect With Your Child (based on Playful Parenting by Larence J. Cohen) 118 // Become a Child Whisperer / Parenting Your Kids True to Their Nature (based on the work of Carol Tuttle) 41 // Our Take on the Grit Phenomenon Books and links we mentioned: Good Inside // Dr. Becky Kennedy The Child Whisperer // Carol Tuttle Playful parenting // Lawrence J. Cohen Phd Owala water bottle Katelin mentioned Sponsor: GABB WIRELESS We LOVE devices that help our kids stay safe and be able to adventure while still being able to contact us safely and allow us to know where they are without being the kind of technology that steals their mental health and attention. Gabb wireless is an incredible company that we FULLY endorse for just that. Go to https://gabbwireless.com and use code FINDTHEMAGIC to get $50 off any device! Thank you for the kind reviews! We appreciate them so much. Review of the week from Bprause My go to I am inspired literally. Every. Episode. I recommend you to all of my friends. I love my children to pieces and I am so grateful to have found a sound resource that I can turn to, to unfold the best version of myself for them. Until recent years I turned my nose up at all ‘self-help' type resources. Until I discovered one day I don't know more than everyone. Now I want ot learn from the best. I truly feel like you ladies are top tier, and I truly truly thank you. --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/findthemagic/support

We often think of play as a child's thing. Parents who don't particularly enjoy building with legos, playing with dolls, or putting on costumes can find the idea of play to be tedious. Joy Wendling, host of the podcast Playfully Faithful Parenting, challenges that definition of play. Listen in as she discusses what play really is, the different ways we are wired to play, and how we can make our house a more playful place. Learn more about me at https://www.lyssastoyko.com/ Want to say hello? Follow me on Facebook and Insta @lyssastoyko Email me at momstaketen@gmail.com Help other mamas find encouragement through Moms Take Ten by rating and reviewing this show. Thanks!

I have been challenged and encouraged by my guest Joy Wendling as she shared about playful parenting. Do you have a hard time playing with your children? Do you find it difficult to fit play into your day? Or maybe you want to know more about the purpose for play. Jump on into this chat and let's learn more! You can find Joy at her website, Created To Play or on Instagram @createdtoplay she is also on Facebook @Created To Play There's even a group on Facebook to join! Discipling Kids with Purpose. Don't forget to check out Joy's podcast, Playfully Faithful Parenting Come Chat with Pam and her friends over on the Facebook group Tending Fields Mom's Group or on Instagram @TendingFields

Kristen describes playful parenting and provides a script to get you started. You can find the book she mentions here: Playful Parenting, by Lawrence J. Cohen, Ph.D.. -- You can find Kristen's books at: Kristensraw.com/blog/coffee-self-talk Join the Coffee Self-Talk Facebook group: facebook.com/groups/coffeeselftalk Instagram: Instagram.com/coffeeselftalk

Playful Parenting tackles telling kids the truth this week, and discusses the complexities regarding talking to your children about some of the harsh realities in this world, and how we can learn about ourselves and grow as parents and people through the process of exploring our discomfort around these conversations.Support the show

Playdates can be fun and a great way to entertain your child. And...they can also be chaotic, noisy and end in tears. Discover how to help your child and their friend have a great time and deal with any friction or fights that may arise.For more help with your child, join me inside Annoying to AMAZING! where you'll receive:more practical strategies to help your child with anxieties, aggressive behaviour, bedtime issues and morethe step by step approach to deal with tantrums, whining and big upset emotionshow to set limits playfully & lovinglyan insight into what's going on in your child's brainplenty of more games for use in many different situationsa deeper understanding of your own triggers so you will shout less and be able to connect more in the heat of the momentPLUS:Ongoing weekly mentoring with me, so you will be supported throughoutvideos of me with my children so that you can see exactly what to doClick here to join

Discover why play is more effective than talking & reassurance when your child is anxious.You can play games in a therapeutic way that will help your anxious child become much more confident and able to cope with difficult situations.Find out more ways play can help & more games inside my FREE online Playful Discipline Workshop. Click here to join today!And if you're wanting to take your parenting to the next level so you can feel more confident knowing you're helping your baby or child in a deeper way, you can:book in a 1:1 sessionjoin Annoying to AMAZING! - my online program if you have children aged 1 - 8 years oldjoin Aware Parenting Babies if you have a baby under 1

Playful Parenting comes at you with this PSA to help remind you to laugh at your child the next time they are disobeying you in a way that is hilarious. It's connective, fun, and can avoid some of those pesky power struggles that feel like they go nowhere. Support the show

How to make travelling much easier when you have a baby or a child.Travelling long distances on planes, trains or in your car doesn't have to be super stressful. Discover what practical things you can do to make it more enjoyable for you and your child.If you'd like to learn how to incorporate more PLAY into your parenting, join me for my online Playful Discipline Workshop - it's FREE!And if you're wanting to take your parenting to the next level so you can feel more confident knowing you're helping your baby or child in a deeper way, you can:book in a 1:1 sessionjoin Annoying to AMAZING! - my online program if you have children aged 1 - 8 years oldjoin Aware Parenting Babies if you have a baby under 1

Play Time is back for Season 2! This episode introduces the new season of Play Time, called 'Playful Parenting'.  Missed being with you all, feels good to be back. Support the show

In this best of episode Justin & Kylie chat about ways we can be more playful with our kids. It's a really important conversation, especially ahead of the holidays!Purchase The Do's & Don'ts of Discipline or find it in your Happy Families Membership. Because a happy family doesn't just happen.Find us on Facebook at Dr Justin Coulson's Happy FamiliesEmail us your questions and comments at podcasts@happyfamilies.com.auSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

In this best of episode Justin & Kylie chat about ways we can be more playful with our kids. It's a really important conversation, especially ahead of the holidays! Purchase The Do's & Don'ts of Discipline or find it in your Happy Families Membership. Because a happy family doesn't just happen. Find us on Facebook at Dr Justin Coulson's Happy Families Email us your questions and comments at podcasts@happyfamilies.com.au

Topics discussed in this episode: In this episode Justin & Kylie chat about ways we can be more playful with our kids. Creating margin Intention Mindset Purchase The Do's & Don'ts of Discipline or find it in our Happy Families Membership. Because a happy family doesn't just happen.Find us on Facebook at Dr Justin Coulson's Happy FamiliesEmail us your questions and comments at podcasts@happyfamilies.com.auSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Topics discussed in this episode: In this episode Justin & Kylie chat about ways we can be more playful with our kids. Creating margin Intention Mindset Purchase The Do's & Don'ts of Discipline or find it in our Happy Families Membership. Because a happy family doesn't just happen.Find us on Facebook at Dr Justin Coulson's Happy FamiliesEmail us your questions and comments at podcasts@happyfamilies.com.auSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.