Podcasts about Imago therapy

Mary Kay Cuccaro shares how Imago therapy helps transform relationship conflicts into opportunities for healing childhood wounds through a structured dialogue process that fosters safety, understanding, and deep connection. • Imago theory suggests we're unconsciously attracted to partners who possess both positive and negative traits of our childhood caretakers• Relationships typically move from a romantic stage (lasting about two years) to a power struggle phase where childhood wounds emerge• 50% of married couples divorce during the power struggle phase after about six years of conflict• The Intentional Dialogue process involves mirroring (reflecting what was said), validating (acknowledging the other's perspective makes sense), and empathizing• Surface conflicts often mask deeper childhood wounds, as illustrated by a couple fighting about a dog that actually connected to grief over a mother's death• Sitting 18 inches apart with eye contact calms the limbic brain and activates the cortex, creating a neurobiological state conducive to problem-solving• People typically respond to conflict by either "hyper-arousing" (getting louder/more expressive) or "hypo-arousing" (withdrawing/shutting down)• Three key elements for a stronger marriage connection: touch/physical affection, safe/respectful communication, and shared activities• Focus on the dynamic in the space between you rather than blaming your partner• Simple eye gazing for a few minutes can rebuild connection when words have become triggeringVisit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways: Strongermarriage.org Podcast.stongermarriage.org Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/strongermarriage/ Facebook Marriage Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/770019130329579 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/strongermarriagelife/ Dr. Dave Schramm: http://drdaveschramm.com http://drdavespeaks.com Dr. Liz Hale: http://www.drlizhale.com

Suzanne Gieser, PhD, is a historian of science specializing in psychiatry and psychotherapy, a licensed psychotherapist, and a leading scholar on the intersection of depth psychology and quantum physics. With decades of experience studying C.G. Jung and physicist Wolfgang Pauli, her groundbreaking book The Innermost Kernel (2005) explores their collaboration on synchronicity. She has served as a senior lecturer at The Institute of Analytical Psychology, authored numerous articles, and edited Dream Symbols of the Individuation Process (2019). Based in Stockholm, she works in private practice and at a specialist clinic for trauma while contributing to the Swedish C.G. Jung Foundation.Suzanne Gieser has a PhD in the History of Sciences (specialty history of psychiatry and psychotherapy) and is also a licensed psychotherapist and supervisor. She works both with a private practice and as employed, amongst others at a specialist clinic for sexually traumatized in Stockholm, Sweden. She has studied the psychology of CG Jung since 1981, and the relationship between Jung and the physicist Wolfgang Pauli. Her book, The Innermost Kernel: Depth Psychology and Quantum Physics. Wolfgang Pauli's Dialogue with C.G. Jung was published in English in 2005. In this book a chapter is devoted to how Paul and Jung cooperated around the phenomena and theory of Synchronicity resulting in a conjoint publication in 1952. Suzanne was a senior lecturer and associate professor for ten years at The Institute of Analytical Psychology (IAP), a private institute of Jungian scholarly studies in Stockholm and has authored several articles and prefaces related to C. G. Jung and Wolfgang Pauli in Swedish and English, including the article on Jung in the Swedish National Encyclopedia. She is a member of the board at the Swedish C. G. Jung Foundation and is co-founder of the Swedish Association for Imago Therapy. She is the editor of Jung's 1937 and 1938 seminars in Bailey Island and New York, published in 2019 in Dream Symbols of the Individuation Process: Notes of C. G. Jung's Seminars on Wolfgang Pauli's Dreams. https://gieser.se/ Bernard D. Beitman, MD has broken out of the restrictive bounds of conservative academic research to produce a blueprint for the practically-oriented new discipline of Coincidence Studies. He has served as chair of the Department of Psychiatry and Neurology and then as chair of the Department of Psychiatry at the University of Missouri-Columbia. He has reached more than one million people through his Psychology Today blog, radio show, website, and two coincidence books, Connecting with Coincidence and Meaningful Coincidences. Yale and Stanford educated, He is the founder and president of The Coincidence Project.https://www.innertraditions.com/books... to purchase Dr. Beitman's new book "Meaningful Coincidences". Visit https://www.coincider.com/ to learn more about Dr. Beitman's research.

In this episode, I sit down with Harville Hendrix and Helen LaKelly Hunt—pioneering relationship experts and creators of Imago Therapy—to explore the profound ways our childhood experiences shape our adult relationships. Together, we dive into the dynamics of attraction, communication, and healing, offering practical tools to help you transform your relationship into a conscious and fulfilling partnership. What you'll learn: Why we are often drawn to partners who reflect both the positive and negative traits of our caregivers—and how this impacts relationship dynamics. The role of Imago Therapy in helping couples heal past wounds and strengthen their connection. Practical communication strategies, including the "Safe Conversations" framework, to foster empathy and reduce conflict. Insights into two-way healing and how relationships can become a pathway to personal and mutual growth. Whether you're single, in a new relationship, or years into a partnership, this episode offers transformative insights and actionable advice to help you create the loving connection you've always wanted. Join us as we unpack the keys to unlocking deeper intimacy, mutual healing, and lasting love. FOLLOW: IG: https://www.instagram.com/love.uncensored.podcast/IG: https://www.instagram.com/nicolecolantonicoaching/  W. www.nicolecolantoni.com Join the private Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/231424128600095 GUEST LINKS:IG: https://www.instagram.com/harvilleandhelen/W: https://harvilleandhelen.com/B: https://harvilleandhelen.com/books/See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Today, we dive into the complex and thought-provoking topic of whether you are responsible for healing your partner's childhood wounds. In this episode, I'll break down the nuances of what it means to be an ally in your partner's healing process and the delicate balance between personal growth and mutual support in a relationship. We'll discuss the ways in which childhood experiences affect our adult relationships and highlight why empathy and understanding are crucial elements in fostering a healthy, thriving partnership.Join me as we explore the intricacies of how we can support our partners without losing sight of our own needs and identity. I'll share insights into managing defensive reactions and the importance of creating corrective emotional experiences. Whether you're in a new relationship or have been together for years, this episode will provide valuable perspectives on deepening your connection and navigating the inevitable conflicts that arise in any partnership.Key Topics Discussed:- The balance of responsibility in healing each other's childhood wounds.- Recognizing and managing defensive reactions in conflicts.- The importance of empathy and understanding in relationships.- Navigating differences and the concept of "opposites attract."Timestamps:02:05 Minimizing and maximizing tendencies in relationships05:47 Balance responsibility for partner's healing with self-care09:48 Avoiding the "you're wrong, I'm right" trap in conflicts16:18 Empathy's critical role in understanding your partnerWant to transform your relationship and take it to the next level?Join my online course here.My Socials:Nick Solaczek on InstagramNick Solaczek on YouTubeNick Solaczek on Facebook

In today's episode, we explore the small but impactful practice of the six-second kiss to cultivate stronger emotional and physical connections with your partner. We'll discuss how this simple act, popularized by relationship expert Dr. John Gottman, can help you stay connected amidst the busyness of daily life. I'll share my personal experiences with the six-second kiss, including some surprising reactions from my partner.Together, we'll delve into the many benefits of incorporating this practice into your relationship routine, from boosting oxytocin levels to reinforcing positive feelings. So, if you're looking to enhance intimacy and build a more connected relationship, this episode has something valuable for you.Key Topics Discussed:- The concept and origin of the six-second kiss- How this practice enhances emotional and physical connection- Personal experiences and reactions from incorporating the six-second kiss- Benefits like reducing stress, breaking negative patterns, and fostering mindfulness and intention in relationshipsTimestamps:00:42 Benefits of the six second kiss for emotional connection02:23 Physical intimacy and the release of oxytocin05:49 Using the six second kiss to interrupt negative patterns and foster positivityWant to transform your relationship and take it to the next level?Join my online course here.My Socials:Nick Solaczek on InstagramNick Solaczek on YouTubeNick Solaczek on Facebook

In today's episode, we delve into the critical issue of resistance in relationships and how to navigate when your partner feels stuck or frustrated. I'll discuss the difference between "I can't," "I don't know how," and "I'm unwilling to change," and why recognizing these distinctions can be pivotal in moving past repetitive conflicts. We'll explore the role of empathy, collaboration, and the importance of taking new approaches to grow together rather than apart.Join me as we unpack strategies to bridge helpless feelings with hopeful solutions, and I'll share how to restore empathy and excitement in your partnership. Whether you're just starting to feel the strain or have been struggling for years, this episode offers insights designed to help you and your partner move forward together.Key Topics Discussed:- Distinguishing between "I can't," "I don't know how," and "I'm unwilling to change"- Strategies for bridging helpless feelings with hopeful solutions- The importance of taking new approaches to grow in relationships- The role of empathy and collaboration in overcoming resistanceTimestamps:00:44 Distinguishing between "I can't" versus "I won't"02:26 The role of therapists and differences in effectiveness04:50 The power of effective communication in therapy07:15 Restoring empathy to strengthen relationshipsWant to transform your relationship and take it to the next level?Join my online course here.My Socials:Nick Solaczek on InstagramNick Solaczek on YouTubeNick Solaczek on Facebook

In today's episode, we explore the fascinating world of communication styles and their roots in our childhood experiences. Join me as I delve into the concepts of "maximizing" and "minimizing" behaviors. We'll embark on a journey up the developmental mountain uncovering how our early interactions with caregivers shape our adult patterns of communication and relationship dynamics.Through understanding the origins of our communication styles, we can gain valuable insight into our own behaviors and those of our partners. We'll discuss how childhood adaptations to either painful lack of contact or painful contact with caregivers can manifest as maximizing or minimizing tendencies in adulthood. By recognizing these patterns, we open the door to growth, healing, and fostering deeper, more conscious connections with our loved ones.So, whether you identify as a maximizer, seeking attention and external validation, or a minimizer, avoiding attention and relying on rigid self-sufficiency, this episode will provide you with a fresh perspective on your communication style. Together, we'll explore how these opposite tendencies often attract in relationships and how couples can work together to break free from unconscious patterns and create a more balanced, loving partnership. Tune in to discover how embracing personal growth and understanding can transform your relationships from the inside out.Key Themes Discussed:- The impact of childhood experiences on adult communication styles- Maximizing and minimizing behaviors in relationships- The "developmental mountain" metaphor in Imago therapy- How opposites attract dynamics stem from childhood adaptations- Opportunities for growth and healing in conscious relationshipsTimestamps:02:15 Maximizing and minimizing communication styles explained06:48 Childhood experiences shape adult relationship patterns11:02 Growth opportunities for minimizers: Opening up and being present15:37 Maximizers' challenges: Self-soothing and decision-making19:50 Understanding unconscious dynamics is key to transforming relationshipsWant to transform your relationship and take it to the next level?Join my online course here.My Socials:Nick Solaczek on InstagramNick Solaczek on YouTubeNick Solaczek on Facebook

In this solo episode I unpack the compelling reasons behind why we are subconsciously drawn to certain types of partners, highlighting how these choices are attempts by our unconscious mind to heal childhood wounds through our romantic relationships. We explore the theory that our partners are not just companions but reflections of our earliest experiences of love and care, pushing us toward unresolved issues from our past. What you'll learn: The foundational principles of Imago Therapy and how it explains our attraction to familiar traits in partners, whether beneficial or detrimental. Strategies for recognising and interrupting unhealthy relational patterns that stem from our childhood experiences. How understanding your 'Imago match' can illuminate the reasons behind passionate yet tumultuous relationships, and how a calmer relationship might indicate a lesser degree of these unconscious matches. Practical steps for using your relationship as a tool for personal growth and healing, transforming conflicts into opportunities to heal childhood wounds. How to build healthier and more fulfilling relationships by engaging in conscious communication and mutual healing with your partner. Whether you're curious about why you're attracted to certain types of people, looking to break cycles of challenging relationships, or simply interested in how to use your relationship for personal growth and healing, this episode provides deep insights and actionable advice. Join me as we delve into how our deepest connections can serve as mirrors to our past and gateways to our emotional healing. FOLLOW: IG: https://www.instagram.com/love.uncensored.podcast/IG: https://www.instagram.com/nicolecolantonicoaching/  W. www.nicolecolantoni.com Join the private Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/231424128600095 Imago therapy: https://harvilleandhelen.com/initiatives/what-is-imago/See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Discover the communication tools that have helped millions of people get the love they want with internationally-respected marriage experts Harville Hendrix Ph.D. + Helen LaKelly Hunt Ph.D. Lindsey sits down with Harville + Helen, who have been married for over 40 years and written over 10 books on the subject, to break down exactly what it takes to create a long-lasting + loving partnership.Ahead, you'll receive step-by-step guidance on how to create safety in your relationship with Harville + Helen's famous communication practices. Plus, you'll discover how your childhood affects how you choose partners and what you can do to create the family system you always craved.Morning Microdose is a podcast curated by Krista Williams and Lindsey Simcik, the hosts and founders of Almost 30, a global community, brand, and top rated podcast.With curated clips from the Almost 30 podcast, Morning Mircodose will set the tone for your day, so you can feel inspired through thought provoking conversations…all in digestible episodes that are less than 10 minutes.Wake up with Krista and Lindsey, both literally and spiritually, Monday-Friday.If you enjoyed this conversation, listen to the full episode on Spotify here and on Apple here.

Live From Boulder Colorado, an Interview with Dr. Paul BretzJim catches up with his long-time friend and colleague from his halcyon days at the University of Chicago. Dr. Paul Bretz (a.k.a. Reverend Paul). Paul is still prolific after all these years —and is still doing his part to make the world a better place. Paul is the CEO of Centus Counseling Center (Centus.org). He is passionate abut high quality, cost effective, spiritually integrative behavioral healthcare. He is also a surveyor for the Joint Commission, whose mission is to continuously improve healthcare. (A real slacker…)In this episode, Paul discusses the stages of psychological, moral, and spiritual development and its impact on individuals and couples. He compares a cosmic consciousness framework with a dualistic framework. Paul delves deep into the importance of Imago Therapy for doing couples work, and shares how it improved his own relationship. Paul makes a strong case for how spiritual development and Imago therapy can be combined to conduct highly effective couples therapy. Paul believes the intensive format is particularly efficacious for doing deep work. Paul is the embodiment of emotional, psychological, spiritual, and intellectual sophistication. He continues to be an inspiration and teacher for me and many others.WCMI networking group A networking group for mindfulness-focused clinicians dedicated to learning together & collaborating for more information click here

Amy fell off a waterslide and lived to tell about it, TAXI, Two gays sued Madonna for starting her concert late, JFL Festival, Tour, People who like their own posts, Love is Blind Season 6, 50 Days sober, Queer Musician Calvyn Cass comes on the pod to talk about what it's like to be in a monogamous throuple and his newest single Menage Trois! Therapy as a throuple, Imago Therapy. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Ready to rediscover the magic that made your relationship sparkle? Our special new year edition of Thrive is your ticket to revitalizing the love and excitement you once felt for each other. Drawing from Harville Hendrix' acclaimed Imago Therapy, we provide an intimate exercise that promises to help you and your partner pinpoint and share the specific actions that used to light up your days together. Whether it was a spontaneous kiss or a shared adventure, revisiting these  gestures can pave the way to a rekindled romance.Thankyou for listening, if you liked it, please remember to subscribe.Join our Private "Thriving relationships - Deepening connection to self and others" community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/1107209283451758/Website: https://michaelandamy.com.au/Join our free 7 day relationship challenge: https://michaelandamy.com.au/free-relationship-challengeIf you would like to book in a private discovery call with us, here is the link: https://michaelandamy.com.au/call

Welcome to our latest podcast episode, where we delve into the world of Imago Therapy and its transformative impact on marriages. In this captivating discussion, we sit down with the renowned Imago Educators, Rabbi Pinney and Helana Herman, to explore how this approach can revolutionize relationships. Imago Therapy, an innovative and powerful therapeutic technique, has gained popularity for its unique focus on conflict resolution and communication in couples. Pinney and Helana expertly guide us through the fundamentals of Imago Therapy, breaking down its principles and techniques. They shed light on how Imago Therapy helps couples better manage conflicts, foster deeper understanding, and cultivate emotional intimacy. Through their extensive experience, Pinney and Helana share inspiring success stories, illustrating the positive changes that Imago Therapy has brought to countless marriages. We learn about the transformative power of active listening, empathy, and mirroring within the Imago framework. Check out our sponsor OKclarity.com Raizel Schusterman can be reached at apositivecoach.com or email Raizel@jewishpeabody.com Rabbi Pinney Herman- 919-637-6835 Helana Herman -919-637-6833 --- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/apositivepodcast/support

In this episode, I'm exploring a complex topic that isn't discussed much. I've enlisted my bestie, Amy Firth, and together with laughter and truth-bombs, we unpack the unique grief of friendships ending.  I've really felt a pull lately to find a way to address this topic. There's so much out there about different types of relationship endings: death, divorce, breakups, and separation, but rarely do I come across conversations that address the unique and profound grief that comes with the end of a friendship. Anchored in our own friendship of 20+ years, join Amy & I as we explore the changing landscapes of friendships and share our own experiences of what helped us sit with and work through the pain and discomfort of friendships ending. “You can still really lovingly hold space for someone and not have them in your life.” - Amy Firth KEY TIMESTAMPS 05:12 - Why it feels so different to other breakups or bereavements. 08:35 - How simple ritual can help us articulate our grief. 14:02 - The importance of clear communication & having difficult conversations. 16:53 - Is conflict constructive or destructive? 18:38 - Amy's experience of going to therapy with a friend. 24:30 - Allowing the seasons & cycles of different friendships. 30:01 - Soul connections and when friendships serve their purpose. 35:03 - How stepping back & letting go can be the most loving act. 39:13 - Are women hardwired to protect the home/our sense of belonging? 49:46 - How the 'Honouring Endings' ritual is a simple tool to honour the endings of friendships. 56:11 - Soul Inquiry Prompts   SOUL INQUIRYSoul Inquiry is a practice where we enter a direct dialogue with our inner self.  The Soul Inquiry prompts for this episode are:Have you experienced a friendship ending before? Is there anything you're being called to do, to honour the ending of that friendship today?  Now it's time to commit to a grounded action:What is a baby step you can take in that direction to integrate it into your life today?   MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE Full Episode Transcript - https://rebeccacampbell.s3.eu-west-2.amazonaws.com/Ep14.+When+Friendship+End_Returning+with+Rebecca+Campbell.docx.pdf Rise Sister Rise Chant on Spotify - https://open.spotify.com/track/6OxrtEqLBJpNxQgWyP2XJS?si=c3e469aada9f4cef  Honouring Endings Playlist on Spotify - https://open.spotify.com/playlist/51GByzTzTlz7kAgfLIngUr?si=a2580feaf65348c7  The Sanctuary: Rebecca's membership - https://rebeccacampbell.me/membership/  The Enneagram Institute - https://www.enneagraminstitute.com/  Imago Therapy - https://harvilleandhelen.com/initiatives/what-is-imago/  Connect with Amy on Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/amyfirthmusic/  The Inner Temple Mystery School - https://rebeccacampbell.me/mysteryschool    Connect with Rebecca: Website - https://rebeccacampbell.me/practice/ Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/rebeccacampbell_author/ Facebook - https://web.facebook.com/rebeccacampbellauthor YouTube - https://www.youtube.com/RebeccaCampbell

Rafael Cortina and his fellow Podcaster, Dr. Jim Bramson, discuss their unique approach to couples therapy. Rafael and Jim utilize an eclectic therapeutic approach that pulls from the following: Gestalt therapy, Internal Family Systems (IFS) Work, Imago Therapy, Emotionally Focused Therapy, Terrance Real, and the PACT model (Tatkin's work), to name but a few. In this episode, Rafael and Jim talk about what has worked well with couples, what has, and why. It is their aim at all times to build genuine rapport with their clients, creating an emotionally safe environment with an emphasis on honesty, curiosity, respect, heart-centered awareness, mutuality, and transparency. Jim discusses the importance of differentiation versus convergence, while Rafael considers the binary described as abandonment versus engulfment. They both agree that laughter is the ultimate elixir. Humor is important for couples work as it breaks down tension, can be a sign of self-acceptance, self-reflection, egolessness, and meta cognition.Cross cultural difference with couples, language barriers, and other barriers to entry are discussed. There is an emphasis on how to be fluent in the unique dialogue the couple shares. Rafael and Jim hope that practitioners listening to this Podcast may learn a thing or two of import that informs their work. Additionally, this episode covers topics relevant to individuals seeking couples therapy. Rafael and Jim want prospective clients to be better consumers of couples therapy and to know what to look for and what to expect. WCMI networking group A networking group for mindfulness-focused clinicians dedicated to learning together & collaborating for more information click here

Relationship conflict is something we often try to avoid or construe as a sign that there is something ‘wrong'. But what if conflict could instead be an invitation & an opportunity for deeper connection, healing and mutual growth? I spent the last 5 days in Strasbourg, France participating in a couples retreat using the “Imago Relationship” method and in this episode I share with you the memorable & useful lessons that will help you to get, build, and keep the love you want. PS: The lessons are applicable if you are single or in a couple!Here's a breakdown of what I share: What is Imago Therapy and an Imago Dialogue? How to use conflict as an opportunity for healing The 3-step formula for a structured conversation (can't believe I'm saying that…) SPOILER ALERT:  Here are the 5 lessons shared #1 All we all really want is to be truly seen, heard, understood, and accepted#2 FYI: You're not REALLY listening! (But you need to)#3 It is not the RUPTURE that is important, but the REPAIR#4 Your past will show up in your present until you heal#5 Make time to have FUN!Are we friends on socials yet? If not, come and say hello through the links below! InstagramTikTokYouTubeWebsiteMusic by: Flood (Instrumental) by RYYZN https://soundcloud.com/ryyznCreative Commons — Attribution 3.0 Unported — CC BY 3.0

On today's episode, Dave and Liz are joined by Clay and Sonja Arnold, relationalcoaches and communication experts, to discuss safe conversations - what they are and how couples can use them to decrease negativity and foster more connection in their relationships. Timestamps: 0:00 – Introduction: Who are Sonja & Clay Arnold?2:23 – What exactly is a safe conversation & how did it get started?4:56 – Sentence Stems - phrases used to keep us from triggering negative responses6:09 – “Is there more about that?”8:28 – Make an appointment to talk with your partner first; ask “is now a good time to talkabout [blank]”11:03 – Why is effectively listening to our partner so difficult to do?14:04 – Couples should strive for zero negativity in their conversations16:25 – Owning your mistakes & making repairs quickly19:05 – Address the negativity in your relationship; don't ignore it because it'll just stack up22:33 – Imago Therapy - what it is & how it affects who we choose to marry24:56 – If our spouse grows, we grow26:48 – Conflict is growth waiting to happen29:01 – Don't ever stop having fun with your partner31:37 – Empathy is about trying to connect with your partner & find out what they're feeling33:26 – Always be willing to learn35:15 – Sonja's takeaway: Don't feel like you're lacking because of your struggles. Don't struggleby yourself. Reach out. Don't go it alone.35:39 – Clay's takeaway: Be willing to learn and grow individually and in your relationship36:10 – Liz's takeaway: Ask your partner if it's a good time to talk about something and thenstart with a compliment36:50 – Dave's takeaway: Own your bad - your behavior, your attitude, and your drama About Sonja & Clay Arnold:Relational coaches for 22 years, Sonja and Clay have worked with individuals, families and couples around the world. Theirs is an integrative, neuroscience-based approach for life planning and inter-personal growth for relationships of all kinds. They offer workshops and consultations with clients including business and religious leaders, coaches and therapists, medical professionals and more - the strategy being that by providing skills to one person, a ripple effect will occur as people practice the skills in their work lives, congregations, families and communities. Sonja and Clay have been married for 43 years and have 4 grown children and 5 grandkids. They live with their grand dogs in Arlington, Texas. Certifications include: Safe Conversations® Senior Trainers, Life Coaching Institute Senior Trainers, Tony Robbins Mastery University graduates, Amen Clinics Brain Health and the Well Life Coaching Certification. Sonja graduated with a degree in Education/Deaf Education and Clay in Communications/Pastoral Counseling. Insights: Sonja: Conflict is growth waiting to happen.Clay: We have to feel safe enough to connect in order to really communicate.Dave: You don't necessarily avoid conflict but you bring things up and handle them incompassionate ways. Watch your temper, your tongue, and your tone.Liz: Some things we experience in marriage are really painful and I wish we could X them out. But perhaps then, we'd missed the magic and the meaning and the growth. Invites:    ●    Before starting an important conversation with your partner, ask if it's a good time first. You could say, “is now a good time to talk about [blank]?”. If they say it's not a goodtime, schedule another time in the near future to have that conversation when he or sheis ready.   ●    Create a code word to use when things start to get negative in a conversation between you and your partner. Clay and Sonja Arnold use the word “marshmallow” to signal when either of them is feeling triggered and something needs to change. Talk with your partner about a phrase that could work for you.    ●    Don't forget to have fun with your partner. Keep dating them long after you're married. This nurtures the space between you and creates more enjoyment in your life together. Sonja & Clay Arnold Links: https://www.heartlifecoachingdfw.com/ https://safeconversations.com/   Visit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways: Strongermarriage.org podcast.strongermarriage.org Facebook: StrongerMarriage.orgInstagram: @strongermarriagelifeTikTok: @strongermarriagelife Dr. Dave Schramm: https://drdaveschramm.com https://drdavespeaks.com Facebook:https://www.facebook.com/DrDaveUSU Facebook Marriage Group:https://www.facebook.com/groups/770019130329579 Facebook Parenting Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/542067440314642   Dr. Liz Hale: http://www.drlizhale.com/ See our website for privacy information.

Rabbi Shlomo Slatkin on Let's Get Real with Coach Menachem, Sunday February 19, 2023 # 133 Finally, Fix Your Relationship Problems and Saving My Marriage- Imago Therapy - A Fresh Approach to Marriage Counseling --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/menachem-bernfeld/support

Join Stephanie and Dan as they talk with Dr. Harry Motro of NeuroDiverse Couples' Counseling Center. Today the topic is trauma, shame cycles, breaking negative cycles, and building healthy communication. Dr. Motro explains more about attachment and the importance of understanding the hurts and needs of others in order to heal from past wounds.About Dr. Motro in his own words:Being married for 38 years and having raised children to adulthood, I have certainly made my fair share of mistakes and have learned how to turn that into growth. My work with you is built upon decades of real-life experience, not just textbook knowledge.I use scientifically-validated psychotherapy techniques for couples which have been proven effective through decades of research with thousands of couples. My core approach is built on Emotion-Focused Therapy-EFT with components of the Gottman Method, Internal Family Systems, and Imago Therapy added in when it is helpful.How to find Dr. Motro:https://www.harrymotro.com/The cycle graph Dr. Motro mentioned is found at:https://www.neurodiversecouplescounseling.com/trauma-cycleDisclaimer:Guests are recognized for their expertise on autism as an advocate, self-advocate, clinicians, parents, or other professionals in the field. They may or may not be part of the faith community; having a guest on the broader topic of autism does not reflect complete agreement with the guest, just as many guests may disagree with our faith perspective. Guests are chosen by topic for the chosen podcast discussion and are not necessarily in full agreement with all beliefs of the chosen guest(s).

We are so delighted to welcome one of our biggest mentors, Helen LaKelly Hunt & Harville Hendrix, in this exciting episode. With their work they gave us a very different perspective on relationships. Relationships are there so that you can see, feel and heal your childhood wounds so that you can grow and evolve together as a couple. Together they developed the Imago therapy or Imago Relationship Therapy (IRT), a specific style of relationship therapy designed to help conflict within relationships become opportunities for healing and growth Their joint work has evolved from typical couple therapy to a huge social movement with hundreds of trained IMAGO therapists around the world, several workshops and training programs, 10 international bestselling books, 3 new york time bestsellers, several appearances at Oprah, Marie Folie and many others as well as keynotes for international companies. They have been married for over 30 years and have 6 children and 6 grandchildren. In this episode we talk about: What is your constant drive? What motivates you both as a couple every single day for decades to do this work? How can you turn triggers into treasures? What is the magic behind IMAGO Therapy and what is it all about? What are the necessary steps to get into a conscious relationship? What is it that most of the relationships tend to go wrong/fall apart at some moment of time and how to get back on track? More about Helen & Harville: Website: https://harvilleandhelen.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/harvilleandhelen/ If you liked this episode, feel free to share it with people who also need to hear it, subscribe to the podcast to never miss an episode or leave us a comment. By doing so, you'll help us reach even more great leaders out there and guide them on the path to more ease in their business and relationship. From the bottom of our hearts THANK YOU! And now: have fun and be inspired while listening to the episode! Love, Annalena & Reimo __________ More about us: - Website: https://www.annalena-reimo.com/ - Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/annalena_reimo/ - YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/annalenareimo

[00:00:00] Welcome to the Successful Life Podcast. I am your host, Corey Berrier, and I am here with my man TJ Hartnett. I always screw everybody heart net? Heart net. Look, Just look. Podcast, bro. I miss everybody's last name up, so my apologies on that. [00:00:14] You're good. Tj, what's up my man? How are ya? I'm doing great. Doing great. Just at a great event last week. Ready to go to another great event this week and Philadelphia Sports, we're pretty kick butt this weekend, so it's, I'm feeling pretty good. I bet, dude. You gotta be tired. So you went to Tommy's event last weekend, right? [00:00:33] Vertical track. I did vertical track last weekend and then this weekend is Service Rocket for the service Rocket Group or, Victor Service Hero or profit Rocket, or whatever name it might be this week, But I'll be at that group that's gonna be, that's gonna be sweet. Should be a pretty good turnout. [00:00:52] They've got a lot of people, a lot of big name people coming there, there are. And from my understanding, it's gonna be plus or minus about a thousand people in attendance from all different, spaces. And there are people that chose to invest in themselves. So that kind of gets me excited, anytime you got somebody spending money to better themselves, they come with a little bit of different intentionality. So that's a cool thing. I agree with you. I totally agree. And I, one thing that I think, and I don't know if you have it, I don't know if you've experienced this or not, but do you sometimes feel like it's a, it is too much information? [00:01:29] Like it's an overload. I do, and it's one of the things that I talk about when I'm on stage was, you're gonna come and you're gonna get absolutely fed through a fire hose. Try and make sure you're taking away, at least somewhere between one and three things that you're actually gonna deploy. [00:01:46] And so when they come and you're like, Hey, that'll change our business, that'll change how we do what we do, whatever that's gonna impact us, and do it quickly. Low-hanging fruit, so to speak. Write it down, put an action plan together for it, which I'll walk 'em through how to do, and then file it away so that you can pay attention to everybody else. [00:02:06] But trying to, Oh, I'm gonna do that, I'm gonna do that, I'm gonna do that. I'm gonna, then you're gonna get back and you ain't gonna do a damn thing. So I really try hard to guide people. Hey, one of the three things that you're gonna do that's gonna make your business run better than it did before you came and you're good. [00:02:21] Shoot, if you just do one thing better that's a win, right? So much good information comes [00:02:26] out of these events and if you try, as you said, if you try to capitalize on all of 'em, it's just you're gonna wind up, going in a circle and not being very successful. [00:02:36] TJ, right now you are actually, I should just let you introduce yourself by Apologies. Why don't you introduce yourselves, since we're halfway through the show. . There we go. No, so TJ, and I am the president and CEO of a company called the Flywheel Coaching Group. [00:02:53] We're a business coaching and training organization for the trades. But we're more boutique-like I'm not looking to be the next stars or the SGIs or those really larger groups. Because I'm just too relationship-driven and too relationship-focused to be where we're headed right now, right? [00:03:10] I wanna be able to come alongside businesses and help 'em where they're at with what they need. We do have a beginning program that we go through that we refer to as our foundational five, and everybody goes through it no matter what. But the only reason being is early in my career as a coach, I didn't do that and, inadvertently hurt some folks. [00:03:27] Where had I done it better things would've happened versus the outcome that they had helped 'em sell really out of the gate, but they weren't priced right. So you can imagine how that worked out. And so just vowed to me that I was never gonna not have the commitment. [00:03:43] Looking over these five core things before we get rolling. Regardless of whether you're a $1 million business or a $50 million business, we're looking at these and it's made things go, a whole lot better. So we're just gonna keep on doing that. What so what five things do you look at [00:04:03] So we look at your billable hour or your pricing because now we've got margin pricing that's been introduced to the game. On the service side we're gonna look at your financial statements, so your profit and loss statement, your income statement, your balance sheet. But we're looking at them not only for completeness but for structure. [00:04:24] Because what I find with most financial statements is that they're set up to make life easy for your accountant, not for you to actually make data-driven decisions about your business. . And so we're gonna, we're gonna go ahead and make sure that it's set up in a way that you can look at it and within five minutes you know where you're bleeding from and you know what's happening and why it's happening. [00:04:43] We're gonna go through, we're gonna get core values and mission statement taken care of because from a cultural standpoint, a lot of people, I'll be talking on this week, a lot of [00:04:52] people they want to have a great, healthy culture, but they've done nothing to align the people in order to create that great healthy culture. [00:04:59] And so core values and mission statement are the very foundation of that. And then lastly, as an organizational chart, I always recommend that we look out three to five years and we build the organizational chart for the company that we want to be versus the company that we are today. And it empowers the rest of the team to see not only what are they doing and what are they responsible for and who's in charge of their care, but it also sees what opportunities lie ahead and how would I go about positioning myself to be somebody that might be able to fill one of those. [00:05:29] So it just brings a lot of clarity and allows us to make way better decisions later on in the coaching than if I didn't pay attention to those things out of the gate. Dude, I'm so glad you said that because that makes, it makes complete sense here's the thing if one of those areas is off the wholly other, the whole wheel doesn't spin because there's a spoke missing. [00:05:51] And those I'm like, now I'm putting it together. . So like it, But you are a thousand percent correct. And I think one of the things that you hit on specifically, and I don't personally map out organizational charts for people because I, but I understand the value and I understand what it is. [00:06:07] That's just not my specialty, right? Yep. But it is super important, and we've all heard this, to have the right people in the right seats on the bus because if you don't, the bus's not gonna run. Not properly. No. Unfortunately, like the ADHD kids like us, you can't put us in the back of the bus. [00:06:27] We gotta sit up by the bus driver, so we behave, it's not that we're any different of a child or different of an individual, but when you put us by the bus driver's got their intent right on us. And we're doing what we need to do so we don't get in trouble. Whereas the more trustworthy kids are the ones that you're gonna put, in the back of the bus. [00:06:42] And I don't mean trustworthy from like ethics, but trustworthy from them, not every little thing distracts 'em, it's some of those challenges, but no, to your point what we uncover is more often than not, the reason that I get into it is nobody really knows what sandbox they own and what sandbox they need to ask permission to climb into. [00:07:05] And. That's where I find like 80% of the things that happen in an organization that isn't fun stem from is overlap, I [00:07:18] think is what you're, that's part of it. It is, It's it it's overlap and then it's the feelings and the beliefs and things that are tied to the overlap, being able to occur and occurring because in one person's mind it shouldn't, And then in the other person's mind, they just think they're trying to help and there are no clear boundaries. [00:07:38] And I often talk about I'll make parallels with kids all the time because I, quite honestly, all of us are still kids. We're just older and we can vote and smoke and drink. But at the end of the day, when it comes to the kid thing like I tell people give me one child that you've ever met that didn't have any rules, that didn't have responsibilities, that didn't have chores. [00:07:58] That was an amazingly well-behaved child. You can't, Nope. At the same time, share with me a child that was just an absolute nightmare. But the parents had rules and the, again, you can't, Right? So it's the same thing in an organization. These things have to exist for them to have the freedom of which they seek. [00:08:23] Yes. Not to reign them in. It's Hey, now this whole pasture out here, this whole area, go have fun and do your thing. We can do that. And it's safe because the fence that's around it, we know keeps the bad stuff out, keeps them in. And that's really what those five things do for an organization it gives us a better chance of keeping the bad things out and the good stuff in. [00:08:51] And really a lot of that, a lot of that is, is structure, which, I, you know I don't like, I like structure. I don't like being structured. Does that make sense? Like I don't Yeah, of course, it makes sense. Give me the confines with which I can work, but don't tell me how to do it. [00:09:09] Yes, Correct. A lot of our clients are that way. A lot of 'em. Large majority. Yeah. Absolutely. So as long as you know that, then you can, work with them accordingly. But it's, it, I lost what I was saying. Are you good? It was confines and things of being, being, liking structure, but not wanting someone to try and make you structured and Right. [00:09:35] And think about this when we're trying to tell our clients to do something, Do you think that's really that's the wrong approach, [00:09:44] Cory, in fairness, I'm a coach, not a consultant, so I don't tell anybody to do anything. Yeah, me either. I'm gonna ask better questions to get them to discover a better answer for themselves, and I'm gonna come alongside 'em and help them to hone a skill set that they may not have or that maybe isn't as good as it needs to be. [00:10:06] But I'm not gonna necessarily tell 'em to do. The only thing that you have to do if you're my client is you have to not be a jerk, if I come and meet with you and you're like, Hey, teach me how to take more of the customer's money, I'm now, you're not your coach, that we're done conversation over. [00:10:22] Aside from that, And the same thing towards your internal people, of course. But aside from that, if you're like, Hey, I really like to do this way, we're gonna have a conversation about it, We're gonna uncover that. Doing it that way isn't hurting anybody, it's delivering a predictable result that's desired. [00:10:37] We're gonna go, and if it is, guess what I'm gonna tell you? Good. Keep doing that next. Yeah. Like it, it's not a size fits. And I think that's one of the other big differentiators in the coaching space is a lot of these groups, if you wanna deviate from the structure or from the book, all of a sudden now you're doing it wrong. [00:10:55] The last time I checked Corey, the thing that makes us all special is our uniqueness. That's right. And so I don't want everybody, I don't want to create 50 TJs running around. I want to create 50 individuals running around that have been influenced by me in certain areas. The only reason they're influenced by me in those certain areas is cause I was fortunate enough to be influenced by a lot of people in the course of my time and my career. [00:11:23] And, I got to post a picture this week with Keith Mercurio. And what that guy has meant to my career, along with a few other folks is unquestionable, right? Did we ever go and eat dinner together and all those types No. But he's the coach that cared enough about me to force me through some things that I didn't want to deal with, right? [00:11:42] And to force me through looking at things through a different lens than the way I was looking at them. And had he not done that, I wouldn't be where I'm at today, right? And so there's a handful of those people in my career. I'm sure there is one for you. And so every chance I get to show them my gratitude, man, I make sure I take it a hundred percent. [00:12:07] A hundred percent. Those folks, they're not a [00:12:10] dime dozen. No, they're not. And when you get somebody, I've got one of my, one of my best friends. He just is the salt of the earth, the best human being that's ever been on this planet, and would give his shirt off. A lot of people are that way, but he's just different, right? He's just different, he just tends to relationships on a level that's just really, it's just really special. And it sounds like Keith is very similar to that of you. A million percent. And like I said, it's one of those things where it wasn't hours upon hours of interaction. [00:12:41] It was the right interaction at the right time with the right amount of follow-up afterward. And over the course of man, I guess now it's probably been the last 15 years we've just stayed connected. It might be. Five Facebook messages a year. It might be two phone calls. It might be running each other at an airport That's happened twice. [00:13:06] It doesn't have to be much, but as I said, when you take, not just Keith, but it's an opportunity for me to give some thanks here real quick, right? Is you take a Mark Atherstone, you take a Weldon Long, you take a Kenny Chapman, a Keith Mercurio, right? These are all guys that had such an influence on my career and in helping to shape me from when I was wet clay to what I am now, that I'm more like a dingy old pot [00:13:38] That I, I wouldn't be where I'm at if they hadn't been a part of my life. And so I just make sure that I express that gratitude when I'm near 'em. And I just, man, I really pray that, that I'll have a hundredth of the influence over somebody in the course of my career that those guys had over me. [00:13:54] Because if I do, the mission should accomplish the rest of it really doesn't matter. Yeah. Yeah. That's fair. That's fair. And I'm I agree with you. I, there's something about it, it's interesting that because, Keith treated you like you and I talked about before this show, just like we, treat the people that we deal with, which is, you do add value first. [00:14:13] And we hear that a lot of times, and it's really a kind of a buzzword for a lot of people. But really what we're talking about with the value portion is you just do stuff outta the goodness of your heart to make somebody's life better. And that's the name of the. It's a hundred percent the name of the game. [00:14:30] And it's one of those deals where we're all on this planet together. [00:14:36] If everybody would just approach it this way, which I know is utopian, I know it's not gonna happen. But if they did, it'd be a whole lot better place. And that's where I will give an insane amount of credit to Tommy Mellow and Bree Avalo at the Vertical Track event. [00:14:53] Corey, I've never been to an event in all my years. And so let's put this into perspective. I, day one for me in the trades was October 1st, 1994, right? Sorry. October 4th, 1994 was my very first day. It was where I went in and I was an apprentice and didn't know anything over the course of the last 28 years. [00:15:20] I've been to a lot of industry events. The one I was at last week was the very first time I've ever been to an industry event where the only thing that you could see no matter where you looked was people caring about each other. The three or four times I heard, like some negativity may be potentially starting up right behind it was somebody coming up and going, Hey, just real quick, I, I know you're frustrated, but is the conversation you're about to have, is that gonna get you closer to where you want to go? [00:15:55] Or is it gonna get you further away and shifted the course of the conversation? Or, Hey, I know you're hurting and everything, but are you bringing value right now, or are you tearing down and this happened across, I don't know how many, hundreds or thousands of. For three solid days. I've, But you, I've never been in an event where that was the case. [00:16:24] And so one of the rarities I, it's the longwinded post that I warned everybody about. I was like, Hey, long post rant. I just had to share it with everybody, my perspective on it on social media, not to kiss up, not to, Oh, Tommy this or Tom. The only way that happens is for you to breathe it and live it and follow it and surround yourself with other people that do the same thing and genuinely care. [00:16:53] Because any other way, it'll, you'll see it, but it won't permeate everything. [00:17:02] You can't fabricate authenticity. It was insane. I was excited to go home and see my family, but I did not wanna leave. Dang. I hate I missed that, man, here's the good news, they'll do it again. And I have to believe that it won't feel any different. [00:17:24] Because of the level of care and things that, that they're putting into it. It, just was really like you talk about value first. That entire event was valued first. And it started with them giving the shop tour of a one taking us through different areas. Then you go into the break room and there's this enormous, I'm talking like going into garage convenience store side drink thing with the same number of choices, Corey, the same number of selections of beverages, and it just took what you want. [00:17:55] If you want something, go get whatever you wanna drink. Just go have it. There are video games there. Who wants to play video games? By the way, Tommy, I'm gonna beat you at Buck Hunter one of these days. But anyway, there were a lot of opportunities there and it made you feel like you mattered. And, I was, I was on a call recently where somebody said something about, my view of culture. [00:18:16] And so I said this, I don't think people quit jobs. I don't think people quit because of their manager or their boss, right? People are like, Oh, they don't quit jobs. They quit managers. I think they quit cultures a hundred percent. I think people are somewhere where they don't feel valued, They don't feel uplifted, and they don't feel like there's opportunity. [00:18:42] And when those things happen, they don't stay. I look back at my career and look if we looked at my resume, I bet you half the people that are listening who are in leadership positions would look at my resume and go, I ain't hiring him. He stays nowhere long enough. I wasn't discontented or disillusioned, I just didn't put up with bs. [00:19:04] So if you said, This is how we are and this is what we do, and then you didn't do it, you lost me. Yeah. I don't mean to a point where there was no room for making mistakes, but you know what I'm talking about? Like these just egregious things of Oh, we care about our people and then being on the phone, talking to 'em in a matter of which that we wouldn't talk to anybody. [00:19:24] Correct. I would see that was what the case was and then I was out, [00:19:28] or I would get somewhere and see that the revenue was the primary focus, the primary objective, the only thing they cared about, and I was out. You have to. It can't be the main focus. It cannot be. It's the result. It's always the result. [00:19:44] For sure. And that was just, Simon Sinek has his most recent book, Infinite Game. Maybe one of the greatest gifts any author ever gave me was his writing that book. Because up until I read it, I did think I was disillusioned. I did think I was a discontented person with a discontent heart. [00:20:02] I did wonder, Hey, how come I haven't stayed at employers? The longest tenure of employer employment that I had was eight years after that. The next longest was like three, and then most of the rest were two or fewer. And I looked at that and I went, Man, I, what's wrong with me? And then I read that book. [00:20:27] And then I read where he talks about that very specific challenge and I went, Holy crap. I had an infinite mind working for finite-minded people. And that's what the issue was. And now I look back and I'm like, Man, I feel a whole lot different about myself. If you think about some of those places that you didn't align with, right? [00:20:52] If you go back in your Rolodex, in your head, you can probably count most of those companies are probably not doing great because if you felt the misalignment Yep. Then other people feel the misalignment. Customers feel a misalignment. Eventually, the thing is gonna burn down. Yeah. Or somebody's making money, but their marketing budget is like 15% and the employees are new every year. [00:21:19] And there's a runway for that. Eventually, that's gonna stop. It is. And that's, that, that goes into now you're talking about human beings that you're recycling through for money, and that, that's on a whole different level. That's I'm a thousand percent with you on that. [00:21:33] It was just, it was eye-opening for me to read through that and pull from it what I did and now be able to go out and deploy it. But like I said, when I was at Vertical Track, I just tell you, like I, and I, and it'll I'll probably talk about this for quite a while. [00:21:49] It'll probably be years from now and somebody will ask me a question and then I'll bring it [00:21:54] back up because it was that impactful. And there's not a way for me to really get past like my wife even said, she's Man, this really affected you. And I went, it did, It really affected me. It really, I came back. [00:22:08] Corey, I walked back into my house a better man than I left. Dang. Because I had those days with those people. [00:22:25] That sounds like my eye lost a journey, but on a different, a different plane there. But yeah, that's something on my bucket list by the way. We'll talk about that on a different day. Oh yeah. I've done it twice. It's life-changing. Yep. But that love that you felt coming home, that love that you felt in that event, it would be about 10 times that. [00:22:42] And it, it's wild and yeah, I'll talk to you about it at a later date. That's just, you've me, you've mesmerized me with that story because you just don't hear that. You don't, you, I don't hear that. You hear that, x, y, z person was there, or, Peyton Manning was there, or who. [00:22:59] but I always ask myself like, What the hell is Peyton Manning gonna teach me? I'm a, I work with people in the trades. What the hell, What is he gonna teach me? He's not gonna teach me anything, so I really don't care if he's there like that kind of stuff. Just, I just don't, I don't put much value on it. [00:23:16] That's all I'm saying. I, so I'm with you, But here's the thing. Tommy didn't have any celebrities. Oh, that's fair. But that's interesting. There were, there are celebrities to all of us in the home service space but there were no celebrities at the event, the closest thing to celebrities I would say would be Joe Polish and Ken Goodrich. [00:23:33] And if you'd say Joe Polish or Ken Goodrich to the general public then, and none of 'em gonna know who the hell those guys are. From that side of things, like they're celebrities to us and they mean a lot to us because of all they've done in our space but they're not the Mike Tysons or the Fitzgeralds or whomever that you might get to come and do a keynote speech. [00:23:54] And I'm not saying there's no value in those things, but I think it breeds a different attendee. Agreed. And a different culture of the event of what's actually happening. And so yeah, I just, thought it was super well done. I can't wait to be a part of it again. [00:24:14] And I look forward to seeing how it affects [00:24:20] how I move forward. Cause I know that there's gonna be times where stuff's gonna come up, and that's gonna be in the back of my mind of are you honoring what was gifted to you at that event with the way you're handling this situation? So I'm gonna ask you a hard question. [00:24:37] It shouldn't be a hard question, but what is, give us one thing that you took away from that event that just you feel like it was something that, if you're willing to share that. Yeah. The way we look at other people, the way we look at other people, you can look at other people, and you can judge, which look I try really hard not to do, but let's be honest, there are times I do it right. But it's even more profound than that, right? It's you're teaching a class, and somebody is disruptive in that class. [00:25:11] And right away mindset goes to, man, this guy's being a jerk. Instead of, I wonder what this guy's got going on that's making him feel or think that this is the best way to handle himself in this situation. And then taking it the next step and going, Man, I'm really grateful that he's in my class today because we met at the right time. [00:25:34] Because I am gonna be the person that's gonna care enough about him to figure that out. And I will a hundred percent guarantee you. Like I did not think about those things that way prior to that class, prior to that event I do now. And so what's that gonna do? That's just, it's just gonna make. The environment that much more inviting to be a part of and show people that, the old adage of it's easier to catch flies with honey than it is with vinegar, right? [00:26:07] Like it, I don't know why you wanna catch flies, but still . But that's the truth, right? And so you left there realizing, and I guess it's simple, but it's also somewhat profound. You left there realizing it's actually easier to be nice than it is to be a dick. Like it takes more energy to be a jerk to people than it does to just be nice. [00:26:30] I would almost argue it might take the same amount of energy. So really you could just take a pick. If it, ultimately you're not gonna lose, you're not necessarily gonna lose energy one way or another, but, so if that's the. Just make a different decision. That's just it. But to [00:26:46] me, the reason that I say more energy is because when the interaction is over, I dunno about you, but if I was a jerk to somebody, like the interaction doesn't stop at the interaction, then I think about it after the fact. [00:26:58] And sometimes I like rehash it. Yeah. I almost never do that when I was nice cuz it's just how I'm supposed to be. So it ends up taking more of my energy to be difficult or conflicting or a jerk than it does to just simply treat people the way that they deserve to be treated. Or maybe not, maybe deserves not the right word. [00:27:20] Maybe worthy is the right word. Like we're all worthy of being treated as human beings that have feelings and needs and wants and desires. A hundred percent. And I, and I especially wanna hone in on that for just a quick second. that, I, and I don't do this, but I see this happen a lot, is people will just rip people apart online. [00:27:44] And I, it bothers me, It really bothers me because you don't know what that person's going through and you're just jumping in on this bandwagon of garbage, but you know nothing. And this hasn't happened to me, so I'm not the victim here. I'm not saying this hap this never happened to me, but I just don't understand like why people, Paul, And there's a specific situation I'm thinking about that happened not long ago between two people that I know. [00:28:10] They both acted like total idiots online. And like I sat there and watched this interaction and I'm like, Y'all are supposed to be like leaders and y'all are acting like you're in prison again, which is ridiculous. And so I, I just think that. Think about how you think about how you wanna be talked to. [00:28:31] And I know that goes back to treat people how you'd wanna be treated, but really it is that simple. You probably wouldn't talk to yourself, not you or me, But some of these people wouldn't, you wouldn't talk to yourself the way you talk to other people, right? Or worse case. So here's the other one that I uncovered, right? [00:28:50] For those of us that have challenges with our internal voice, would you ever let somebody else talk to you the way that you sometimes let yourself talk to yourself? Nope. So it, it goes both ways. Corey, I a hundred percent get where you're coming from. But the answer is no. So just knock it off. [00:29:08] It's a, it's wasted energy. There's nothing good that's gonna come from it. [00:29:12] Whether it's you talking that way to somebody else, you talking that way to yourself, the only thing it's doing is creating muscle memory for you to continue talking that way. So just, yeah, stop doing it. I'll tell you, I, and this is something I've worked on really hard over the last three years I guess you could say. [00:29:31] But more importantly, and really it comes down to, it's a decision, right? And if you just look at it like that, it's just a decision that I can choose to feel like garbage or I can choose to just not let that thing affect me. And guess what? If it's not within my arm's reach, I don't really have that much control over it anyway. [00:29:54] So why am I worried about what's happening next month or what happened last month? I can't do anything about that. Nope. Right now, today, no. And alls it does is take away what. Enjoyment might be available for you today, . And that's where I think the energy de depletion comes from. Is the stress to your point about, it takes more energy to be upset because you invite negative energy into your life. [00:30:21] And I don't know about you, but I pick up on people's energy. I know when people are being genuine and when they're not. And I know if people are telling me the truth or not. Like it's just people. There's in ADHD people get this because all, most of us are impacts and most of us can see four or five steps ahead. [00:30:40] Most of us can see steps ahead for everybody else, but it's hard to do it for ourselves. Let's see. There's a whole list of things. Yeah. So I think one of the things in this space though right now that that bothers me a little bit. And I promise this is gonna be a positive thing, not a negative thing is that we don't, we're not putting enough time and attention on just simply being good people to other people in our salesmanship, right? [00:31:12] Everybody wants to learn how to be better closer. Everybody wants to learn how to be more persuasive or for what? Yes, stop all that. I just want to get to know the people better and understand what it is that they're challenged with and what they're true. Like desired state, if you will, is Cory, if you could wave a magic wand and [00:31:38] make your house feel a certain way, tell me what that would be, right? [00:31:43] What's the humidity level, What's the temperature? What's the, when the sun shines through the window, is there stuff floating in it or not? When you drink water, are you chewing it too? Like asking them questions about and then going, All right, so Cory, based on those things that we've discussed, which of them are of the top priority that you wanna make sure that I try and solve for you today? [00:32:05] It doesn't have to be more complicated than this yet. We probably spend millions of dollars as an industry making it more complicated than this. And alls we need to do is just start caring about people, apply the fifth abbot, right? The fifth habit of seek first to understand, then to be understood and get after it right? [00:32:33] Genuinely care. And I think the reason we spend millions of dollars. is because I think everybody thinks it can't possibly just be this easy . Sure. It can't possibly just be that you just have to care. No, it really is that easy, right? We talked about previous performance and things of that nature, right? [00:32:53] And so I was on a panel and I got to sit next to some ridiculous people on this panel. As far as what they've accomplished, right? We're talking Tommy Mellow, Brent Buckley, Victor Rancor Lance Bachman, right? We're all on this panel. Start talking about sales and how, back in the late nineties, early two thousands, a million dollars in sales was like a really big deal. [00:33:17] And then afterwards when we were done, I got to talking and I said, I don't really bring this up a lot, but did you know that I did 1.2 million in sales in 2000 and I didn't sell equipment? [00:33:32] And like a bunch of people just went What'd you just say ? I was like, Yeah, I did. I did a little over 1.2 million in sales as a technician in 2000. And I didn't sell equipment. It was all repairs, add-ons, accessories, enhancements, rejuvenation, no equipment. And they're like, How? And I'm like, 1.2 million worth of stuff was wanted by the customer. [00:34:02] That's it. [00:34:04] That's it. So just think we've gotta change the lens that we look through and stop being so concerned about the sales and start being concerned about how many new friends we can make and how many problems we can solve and truly care. And the problem with it is this, you can't fake it. [00:34:23] That's right. You absolutely cannot bake it because there's incongruence. I'll tell you, you're you can have a poker face, but you can't have a poker body. So your body will always tell the truth. Did you know that? Look, I could tell people I eat healthy all the time. The minute I stand up and the belly comes out, , all that's off right now. [00:34:51] I can tell you this, I'm getting a whole lot better than I used to be, which is why there's less of me now than there was 10 years ago. But no, exactly to your point, Corey, like the other side of it is this is, if I watch you for longer than today, you'll review yourself to me. Yeah. Which is why I don't like doing one and two day onsite. [00:35:16] Nope. I want, I, people are like, You're just trying to sell me more. I'm like, No, I need at least three days to see who you truly are. Yeah. Cause everybody can fake it for a day or two. You really need five days. Truly. I like to have five anyway. I like to have five as well, but when five's not available, three and four are all I'm doing. [00:35:41] If it's a one day thing, it's for me to teach a class, not to do an onsite. It's like I'll come and teach a customized class to your team, but it's not for onsite related things. One in two days is strictly for content. Let's clarify that for the audience, because that's really important. Because one thing that, Yeah, just yeah. [00:36:00] Clarify why you don't come in for one day or even two days and then leave. And my guess is whenever you come in for a how about this? You just tell me. I won't guess. You just tell me. No. So the people can select that they want to have you on site anywhere from one day to five days. And then they can do more than five days, I'm excited. I'll be not sure if it's February or March, but I'll be in Australia most of the month. Next year. So that's gonna be a good time. But when I go on site, [00:36:30] if it's for one day or two days, it's specifically for me to teach a specific class and give a specific skill set. It's not for me to uncover anything. [00:36:39] It's not for me to help solve any issues or put something in place that's not in place, cuz it's not enough time to do it. Three, four and five days is where we start getting into those other things. And quite frankly, sometimes they're not enough. And here's what I will tell you. Every onsite I've ever done, we went with an agenda. [00:36:57] And if it was a full week, by the third day, the agenda no longer looked the same as it did when I got there. Because the truth comes out what the company really needs, what the people really need is different than what we might have thought they needed virtually through Zoom meetings, right? [00:37:17] And so it's impossible to give lasting change in a day or two because people won't reveal who they truly are. The other side of it is if you don't start by uncovering beliefs, you're wasting your time on everything else you do. Because if the beliefs aren't aligned with it, you could teach people all you want. [00:37:42] Nothing's gonna change. You've gotta understand what are their beliefs, why are they there? Where did they come from, and how committed are they to them? And then once you understand all of that, then we have an opportunity. To make improvements or adjustments even. But without that, you're just really listening to yourself talk, and that's why we have this happen. [00:38:07] Oh, the guy was on site and he, after he left, we did great for a week or two, but then it went right back to where it used to be, and then we had to call him back and pay him another X, y, and Z number of dollars. That's why that happens. Yeah, of course it is. That seems like the model sometimes. [00:38:24] Yeah. My view as a coach and I'm pretty sure you're the same way. You should eventually outgrow me. Yeah. Yeah. My skill sets are what they are now. Am I constantly trying to improve them? Yes. But they are what they are. Like I'm really good at the things I'm really good at, but I stay in my lane. [00:38:44] If you wanna know. What to do to have the absolute best marketing plan you possibly can. I am not your guy. Nope. If you want me to look at your [00:38:56] marketing plan and tell you if I'd make adjustments, like I'm okay with that, but I'm not the guy to, to refine your marketing program. I'm probably not the guy to, come in and tell you what you should be doing with your office staff as far as dress code and things like that on its own. [00:39:20] But yet we hire people for this shit all the time. I don't know how you do it without looking at what everything else that's going on. And that's why I'm not any good at those things. So I'll adjust and come in. If you want your team to follow a process, if you. want beliefs aligned. [00:39:38] You want culture healthier? I'm a hundred percent your guy, but it isn't happening overnight. I'm not gonna promise it's gonna happen overnight. And there's a lot of hard work that has to get done. And I do think, and I know we're like jumping around, but welcome to adhd, is, I think that's one of the challenges of social media for us today because everyone's looking at some of these different, or operators that are out there that grew from zero to 50 million or zero to a hundred million or whatever in four years, five years, seven years. [00:40:11] So what you don't know the story behind that. You don't know what's behind the curtain of Wizard of Oz. You, we don't know how leveraged they were so that when the payoff happened, how much they actually walked away with. And here's the other thing, it also, it doesn't matter cuz it's them not you. [00:40:30] it's their team, not your team. It's their people, not your people. It so stop looking at everybody else and start looking internally and go, Hey, what do I really want for myself, my team, my clients, and my company? And then devise a plan and go get it. But stop looking at everybody else. This is where we gotta be. [00:40:50] Like those horses in the Kentucky Derby where they wear them things and the whole reason they wear those things is cuz if they could see the guy over here instead of running the race, they'd fight with him. Yeah. That's where we've gotta get, I'll be honest dude. I do that to a degree with, and similarly, like when I'm working I'll put on Bial focus music cuz it helps me dial in like the blinders. And it's important to know about these things cause it can really help. Have you ever used Bio Neural Beach before? [00:41:19] You know what I'm talking about? Hold on, . [00:41:22] Hold on, let me find it. [00:41:31] You mean this right here? [00:41:37] And you? Is that I, is that the guy on, Do you watch, Do also watch it on YouTube? I don't watch it on YouTube, but this is just literally a mix on iTunes of just continual, just that background music that helps me to just pay attention to what I'm doing. And so if I really need time of focus that the AirPods go in and I'm focused. [00:42:06] No interruptions. No interruptions cannot happen cause it, man, I just, I didn't really anticipate talking about ADHD that much. But dude, like if you really think about how bad it throws you off, just the slightest thing, and like you're married, but your wife could come into your office and say, Hey, do something completely unrelated, or something completely important. [00:42:31] And it may take, I may not get back on track for an hour, right? And that whole hour is wasted because I'm, figuring out what I'm doing. So the way I help myself with that is I write on a note the thing I'm doing, and I put that note in front of me so that way if I forget again, I could just look at the notes and see what I was doing. [00:42:54] still full transparency, right? While we're on this call, my son comes down and he's got something to put in the free, the storage freezer that's down here. And so he take, brings it down, he puts it in the storage freezer, goes back upstairs. And the whole time since he did that, my thought process is, He knows I'm on a podcast. [00:43:11] He knows I'm down here. Why in God's name did you just have to bring that down here and put that in a freezer right now? What the Yeah. And so to your point and then I hear wind outside and I keep the shade pulled on the door on purpose, right? But I hear it. And so now I'm wondering what's going on out there, , But I'm supposed to be paying attention to this [00:43:35] Yes, I get it dude. And here, let me clarify this for everybody, like it's not that we have a lack of focus, it's that we just hyperfocus sometimes on the wrong stuff and everything gets us say. That's, I [00:43:48] think the bigger difference is we don't miss a thing. If you really want like a good observer, get a ADHD person. [00:43:58] Cause nothing will happen without us noticing it. Nothing. Yes, correct. , but here's what will happen and we won't notice it. Get a new piece of furniture and put it in my house while I'm away. When I come home, I ain't gonna say nothing. Nope, nothing. Like my wife will get her haircut or whatever, and I'll do the same thing. [00:44:23] I'll get my hair cut and there's no compliments back and forth because neither one of us realize either other person got a haircut, [00:44:33] So it's a, it's a hard thing to understand until you're the one that's living with it. And you get, Let me ask you if you ever struggle with this is something that is some, if there's, if I'm having a conversation with my wife or, and it's something that I'm gonna have to ask her to do and I feel like there could be the slightest bit of friction, I'm just gonna do it my damn self. [00:44:57] I'm just not gonna, I'm just not gonna ask or I just won't do it. Period. We're both that way. Yeah. Mi Missy and I are both that way, We're both very non-confrontational and so if we think something that we might do might upset the other one. We just either take care of it ourselves or we just don't do it. [00:45:15] Yeah. You know what's interesting and there's a guy, and I can't remember the, I think it's called Love and Relationships, I think is the name of the book, Ericks. And it's a, Did you, have you ever heard of it? It's Love and respect. It's Emerson Ericks. That's exactly, that's absolutely it. And I'm like, after, I'm not sure how I got my hands on this thing, but I'm listening to it. [00:45:39] I'm like, Holy crap. Every dude that's married and every woman that's married needs to read this book because it really does clarify. The miscommunication in relationships. So this is hilarious. Wow. I can't believe we got here from where we started. So I had planned for this fall to do a spousal business owner workshop. [00:46:07] I was gonna run a vbo in Lake Norman, which is just outside of Charlotte. Yep. [00:46:14] And I was only inviting 10 couples, 10 business owner couples. And we were gonna do a one week retreat, basically spousal business owner retreat. That retreat was built off of Love and respect by Emerson Ericks was built off the Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman. [00:46:38] It was built off of The power of a praying husband, the power of a praying wife. It was built off of the book by the owners of Radiant Plumbing and Heating, the case beers. And then there's also something called Imago Therapy, which is a type of counseling that you can go through as a married couple. [00:47:04] Those five things were the resources that I dug into along with my findings as a coach for spousal business owners of the things they struggle with and put them together to create this week long workshop so that they could leave with the ability to work better together and the ability to know when work started and personal stopped and vice. [00:47:31] That was the whole premise of that workshop. We didn't hold it just because too many things were going on this year. And quite frankly, I did a really bad job marketing it. We will hold it in the spring. We will. Thousand. I hold it in the spring. That's gonna be killer because, and I, of course I understand the value of it. [00:47:50] Cause I've been through the books, I've been through all those. The praying one, I haven't been through that, those two, but the other ones, I've been through those. And you're right, It's, but you gotta, but you gotta want, you gotta wanna get better. You gotta wanna be able to communicate with your spouse better. [00:48:04] You gotta want a better relationship. You want, you gotta wanna have better conversations. And unless you look into these things, if anybody, you're they're not just gonna pop outta your head, right? They're not, you're not just gonna all of a sudden wake up one day and everything's gonna be great. [00:48:20] If things are not great today, you gotta make changes. No, but our business should be something that in increases our intimacy and increases our love for one another and increases our ability to dream together. It shouldn't be something that divides that. And if it is something that's dividing it well then something's not the way that it should be.[00:48:40]  [00:48:40] And it doesn't mean that you are doing anything wrong. It probably means that there's something that you're not doing because you simply don't know to do it. Yeah. And that was the whole premise of this workshop because I will tell you, when I work with spousal owners, it's the same, pardon me, It's the same seven to 10 challenges for all of them. [00:48:58] Every single one of 'em. I could make out a list of 10 challenges, and I will guarantee you that the primary challenges in their businesses are on that list. A hundred percent guaranteed. Yeah, I'm sure you're right. I am sure you. , and I think it's important, the spousal por portion, like I, I don't really care what people say. [00:49:18] Like at the end of the day, if it worked for my wife, there's no way I could do the stuff that I do. Impossible. Impossible. She's not even a part of my business. But guess what? She is a part of my business cuz she runs our house in addition to her business. She does all the crap. I don't have time or want to do for that matter. [00:49:37] And she's really good like that. And it makes my life and my work life significantly better. Yep. Amen. Amen. Yeah, I'm with you, Miss. Without Missy Flywell doesn't exist. Yeah. Period. It just, flywheel never happened with, without her. Honestly, man, without her, I'm probably still operating, to be honest with you. [00:49:58] Yeah. I'm probably still a miserable operator instead of chasing my passion, chasing, allowing the fear to get overcome. And chasing my passion of growing other people for a living and being a coach. Like the, when I found coaching, like I knew damn I found what I was put on earth to do and it took me a long time to grow the courage to actually pursue it. [00:50:23] And without her probably never happens. Cause she's a cheerleader, right? She gave us that belief that we just couldn't muster at certain times. Cuz I've been there, cheerleader's not even the word. There's just a lot of things. There's just a lot of things. But yeah, cheerleader is a primary one. [00:50:41] Supporter. That belief, The belief in the belief is the biggest thing for me. She believed accountability partner, believe in me. Accountability partner too. Big time, right? She's I'll say something and she'll be like, Oh my God, you're so humble. When I'm being an ass, when I'm saying something like, and she'll look at me and she'll be like, Oh, you're so humble. And then roll her eyes at me and . But it worked, [00:51:06] right? But it wor it works beautifully, right? It works beautifully. Not offend nothing, right? But that's, and that's the power of learning how to communicate not only in your bus, in your business, but with your spouse. [00:51:19] It's the same difference. You need to communicate with your employees, your staff, the same, same way. Yeah, but I can't wait. She joins me in July, baby. I can't wait. She'll complete a 23 year teaching career. And in June or sooner we'll see, and in July, she'll join me on the team and be an integral part of, she already is an integral part, but she'll be a day to day integral part of what? [00:51:44] Of what we do at Flywheel. People say like, How can you teach a spousal business owner class? That's how that's how cause, Cause even though she's not involved in the day to day, she's I'm married and I own a business and it's not the first time that I was married and known to business. [00:51:58] And the first time, the first go around, I was married and known a business. I wasn't very good at it. So I learned all the things that you're not supposed to do, and I learned all the ways to not handle that. Now I'm married, and I own a business again. And I gotta be honest with you; I don't know so much that I'm better as as the spouse is , but the fact of the matter is it still helped me uncover some of the things that have to happen for it to really be successful. [00:52:23] And I just think when, those types of things, you owe it to share 'em. Yeah, no, I totally agree with you. I totally agree a hundred percent. Dude, this has been such a great conversation. I know we've been all over the place, but guess what? People that listen to this show they're gonna follow this conversation cuz they follow me; great news. [00:52:44] So whenever I have somebody on, it's ADHD, and it goes all over the place, I'm like, that's cool. People listen totally fine. They'll, they, they've caught all by now. Tj I think, dude we've covered a lot of stuff today. This has been, again, it's been a fascinating conversation, and I. [00:52:59] Probably, you and I gonna have a lot more conversations after this. Yep. And I'm looking forward to that. So if you could tell everybody maybe where they can find you, how they can get ahold of you, Tell 'em whatever you wanna tell 'em. Yeah, absolutely. So I'll give you two different methods, and people think I'm crazy for giving the second one, but I'm gonna give it anyway. [00:53:16] The first way is you can go to www dot flywheel, C as in coaching, G as in a group, flywheel cg.com. You can learn about the flywheel, and you can learn about what we do. We're still building out the site, so gimme a little grace there cuz I am not the IT [00:53:32] guy. And then the second way is I'm just gonna give my direct cell phone. [00:53:35] But I'm gonna ask one thing, use text as the primary means of communication because I'm typically doing something like this, either Corey with someone like yourself or with a client or whatever. And I just can't answer it when people call. So I, I hate voicemail. Like, I hate listening to voicemails. [00:53:49] I don't know about you, but I hate it. Come of me; I'll do it. I have to look at it. I'm just, 'cause you're gonna leave me a phone number that I can't write down. Like it is what it is. Anyway, so direct cell line 2 1 5 2 7 2 9 0 3 6. So pay attention, folks, because you know when, and this is important if you're a business owner and you obviously communicate with your employees, you communicate with your customers. [00:54:18] TJ made a really good point, right? He explained really clearly how to contact him. He also explained really clearly how not to contact him. So my point in bringing that up is if you give clear, concise directions in your business like he just did with that phone. You're gonna have a way more successful time. [00:54:37] Yep. If you call me and you leave a voicemail, you've given up the right to get mad at me when I don't return your call. That's simple. That's cause I just told you not to do that. . Exactly. But people like you and me, like we gotta keep messages and stuff in one area or two, probably. It's a lot. [00:54:54] So go ahead, Corey. You can find me on Facebook. You can find me on Instagram as well. I don't have any like handles or anything. It's literally TJ Harnett no matter where you look for me. So I'll put it all in show notes. I appreciate you, my man, back at you, brother. I appreciate you having me on and look forward to staying connected and just growing this relationship, buddy. [00:55:15] I think so. It's gonna be, it's gonna be great dude. We were more light than I thought, I appreciate you, my man. Back at you bud.   TJ Hartnett CEO Flywheel Coaching  TEXT: (215)272-9036 https://www.facebook.com/groups/flywheel/permalink/5574055359356609/     I educate and develop sales teams in home services businesses, specifically plumbing and HVAC. You can go to www.hvacplumbingsales.com Relevant Links: www.Successfullifepodcast.com Please join my free Facebook group https://www.facebook.com/groups/thetradeschools  Follow me at: https://www.instagram.com/coreyberrier/ www.linkedin.com/in/coreysalescoach  #1 best-seller on Amazon, 9 Simple Steps to Sell More $H!T! https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0B2C3HHMC  

Welcome back to Kickass Couple's Podcast. Today we have a real treat for you. Rabbi Shlomo Slatkin and his wife, Rivka really walk  their talk. Twenty years ago they saved their marriage by going to Imago/couples therapy. That experience transformed their relationship and led them to a higher calling. Today they lead thousands of couples through their No Blame, No Shame Marriage Restoration Project weekend retreats helping partners reignite their passion and commitment for one another. In today's RECAP edition episode, Kim and I will share our key takeaways from our interview with this dynamic couple. We'll break down concepts, relationship qualities and key pillar points that they've used to build their rock solid relationship that will stand the test of time.#divorce #adultchildrenofdivorce #reactiveparenting #abusivefamily  #TheMarriageRestorationProject marriagerestorationproject #marriedlifeproblems #marriedlifeadventures #marriedlifegoals #marriedlife❤ #marriedlifeisthebestlife #marriedliferocks #husbandandwifeteam #husbandandwifeforlife #marriageiswork #dateyourspouse #loveyourspouse #healthymarriage #marriagetips #imagotherapysavedtheirrelationshipWhat You'll Learn by Watching This Podcast:Sometimes marriage therapy is neededOne of the tennants in Imago Therapy is the conflict is an opportunity to growBeing willing to accept your partner's influence can create connectionCommitment can be very freeingQuotes:“A lot of baggage for sure, she said. And we all bring different things to the relationship and it's really important to unpack that before as early as possible, ideally before you're married.” 5:43- 5:55“She felt like the reason their commitment was so strong is because he was that calm, consistent influence always being there and present, always giving her what she needed in the moment.”   7:13 - 7:22“If you take care of it, and nurture it and have those discussions, you can have a relationship where you are right now that is meaningful and rewarding.” 8:26 - 8:34“Shlomo said, that he actually quoted is that Conflict is the vehicle in which can create healing and growth in a relationship.” 12:34 - 12:42“The world would be a better place if we all had more of a sense of wonder.” 21Rivka Slatkin - LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/themarriagerestorationproject/Rivka Slatkin - Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/rivka.slatkin- Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/themarriagerestorationprojectRabbi Shlomo Slatkin - https://www.facebook.com/shlomo.slatkinInstagram - https://www.instagram.com/explore/tags/themarriagerestorationproject/Rabbi Shlomo Slatkin- LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/themarriagerestorationproject/Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/themarriagerestorationprojectFollow us at:Instagram: @kickasscouplesnation Facebook: @kickasscouplesnation LinkedIn: @kickasscouplesnationTikTok: @kickasscouplesnationVisit our website: https://www.matthewphoffman.comFor access to workshops with professional therapists, keynote speakers, hot seat training and more exclusive content join our online learning community at: https://matthewphoffman.comOrder ‘Kickass Husband: Winning at Life, Marriage, and Sex' by Matthew Hoffman at https://amzn.to/3MDTESTAnd if you haven't done it already, be sure to like, subscribe and share our channel!#divorce #adultchildrenofdivorce #reactiveparenting #abusivefamily  #TheMarriageRestorationProject marriagerestorationproject #marriedlifeproblems #marriedlifeadventures #marriedlifegoals #marriedlife❤ #marriedlifeisthebestlife #marriedliferocks #husbandandwifeteam #husbandandwifeforlife #marriageiswork #dateyourspouse #loveyourspouse #healthymarriage #marriagetips #imagotherapysavedtheirrelationship

In part 2 of our episode with attorney-turned-Imago-healer Igor Meystelman, Igor shares the nitty gritty of how Imago therapy works, explaining and drawing from his own journey and experience from the dialogs with his wife. Imago relies on the fundamentals of human behavior and our deep and innate desire to grow and form healthy human connections.By sharpening and heightening our intrinsic senses of perception and intuition, Imago allows us to put what we already know, into thought and words. With practice, empathy becomes our initial reaction to any conflict or to any person, and supersedes our reactive and impulsive tendency to be insensitive, critical or harsh.To fully appreciate this episode, be sure to listen to part 1 found here: https://hopetorecharge.com/episode/the-evolution-of-a-divorce-lawyer-to-imago-healer, in which Igor shares the journey of how he got to Imagoland. We previously mentioned how he saw many couples pursuing divorce but after a fateful and explosive conflict with his wife, he discovered Imago Therapy, which helped his conquer obstacles in his own marriage and exponentially strengthen the bond between himself and his spouse.Although its power has the latent ability to overcome tremendous barriers, heal years of unintentional abuse and gain true wisdom, it is most effective when both participants are willing and ready to grow together, to heal and unite. In unimaginable ways, Imago provides the critical tools needed to mend years of chronic dispute and allows each participant to finally feel what their partner has felt all along. In their continuing journey, both participants can adapt new methods of truly understanding their spouses in a healthy and loving way and achieve a true love that comes from a place of safety, deep understanding, empathy and trust.If you need more support in your mental health journey please reach out to us in our private Facebook group. We also offer free 30-minute fitting calls for our coaching program. You do not have to walk through your mental health struggle alone. Because as always, together is better!—————————————————————————Connect with Igor:https://www.relationshipreimagined.comFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100006067605298IG: https://www.instagram.com/dmd_conversation/Igor's Podcast on Spotify:https://open.spotify.com/show/0wghT0Q150cP7hovP0BHLV?si=dd1746c660574dc1Igor's Podcast on Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/dating-marriage-and-divorce-conversations-dmd/id1575285240—————————————————————————Topics Discussed:Spousal Validation with Imago TherapyPortraying parent-child dialogue rolesNot feeling seenChildhood healingBeing supportive and empathetic to a spouse to encourage harmony and assist healing—————————————————————————Quotes:“When I started crying, she said that was the most validating experience she ever felt.” @Igor Meystelman @MatanaJacobs #HopetoRecharge“That, deep craving of, wow, my spouse finally sees me. Not what they want to see, not what they pretend to see. They see, me.” @Igor Meystelman @MatanaJacobs #HopetoRecharge“The spouse is meant to play that link that could help you heal” @Igor Meystelman @MatanaJacobs #HopetoRecharge“How can I be supportive of your journey?” @Igor Meystelman @MatanaJacobs #HopetoRecharge—————————————————————————If you need more support in your mental health journey please reach out to us in our private Facebook group. We also offer free 30-minute fitting calls for our coaching program. You do not have to walk through your mental health struggle alone. Because as always, together is better!There is no substitute for a listening ear. Get Your Free 30 Minute Consultation Today.http://www.hopetorecharge.com/1on1—————————————————————————Interested in joining our monthly Mastermind?Find out more info here! http://www.hopetorecharge.com/Mastermind—————————————————————————Suicide Hotlines:USA: 1-800-273-8255USA Crisis (Text): 741-741Canada: 1-833-456-4566United Kingdom: 116-123Australia: 13-11-14International Suicide Hotlines:https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_suicide_crisis_lines—————————————————————————Connect with us!Website: https://hopetorecharge.com/Private Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/2079694042156503/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/matanajacobs/—————————————————————————3 WAYS THAT YOU CAN HELP THE PODCAST:1) Subscribe via iTunes and leave a review. It costs nothing. https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/hope-to-recharge/id1464788845—————————————————————————2) Spread the word via social media. It costs nothing.Website: https://hopetorecharge.com/Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/2079694042156503/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/matanajacobs/—————————————————————————3) Subscribe to us on:iTunes: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/hope-to-recharge/id1464788845Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/00AIhRZOxKNOvenz32gGeKStitcher: https://www.stitcher.com/podcast/heather-parady-2/hope-to-rechargeYoutube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC_DkYMcco7pSrkKk6wU5p7w—————————————————————————Today's episode of Hope to Recharge is sponsored by https://www.relationshipreimagined.com Real transformation requires deep and meaningful work. You and your spouse/partner commit 12 weeks of your lives to meaningful and deep work on your relationship. In exchange, you will walk away with incredible and proven tools that will continue to serve you and enhance your relationships for the rest of your lives. In addition, the skills you will learn and integrate are transferable, and they can be applied in many of your personal and professional relationships. By going through this transformation, you will not just reinvent your romantic relationship, but you will create for yourself the possibility to be an agent of change with many of the people you interact with.Get a free discovery call and free 30 minute session today. Visit https://www.relationshipreimagined.com and ask about our Romantic Relationship 12 Week Course—————————————————————————Today's episode of Hope to Recharge is also sponsored by https://Maxifyz.com/ and https://Betterhelp.com/hopetorecharge. Maxifyz.com provides doctor formulated, lab certified, USA grown high quality CBD oils, tinctures and 100% legal Hemp products to reduce anxiety and stress, provide muscle relaxation and help to get a better night's sleep. Use coupon code HOPE to get 10% off your order plus free shipping.Betterhelp.com is the world's leading provider of online therapy. Their mission is to make professional counseling accessible, affordable, and convenient, so anyone who struggles with life's challenges can get help, anytime, anywhere. Head to https://Betterhelp.com/hopetorecharge for 10% off your first month of services. IMPORTANT: Be sure to click this link in order to get the 10% off code.Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/hope-to-recharge/donationsAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

Welcome back to Kickass Couple's Podcast. Today we have a real treat for you. We are being joined by Rabbi Shlomo Slatkin and his wife, Rivka- and they really walk their talk. Twenty years ago they saved their marriage by going to Imago/couples therapy.That experience transformed their relationship and led them to a higher calling. Today they lead thousands of couples through their No Blame, No Shame Marriage Restoration Project weekend retreats helping partners reignite their passion and commitment for one another. Join us as we look through our lens of ‘prioritization' and hear how Rabbi Shlomo and Rivka found their way back to each other through Imago couples therapy. And discover how they were able to recognize their personality differences as proof of being each other's perfect soulmates.#divorce #adultchildrenofdivorce #reactiveparenting #abusivefamily  #TheMarriageRestorationProject marriagerestorationproject #marriedlifeproblems #marriedlifeadventures #marriedlifegoals #marriedlife❤ #marriedlifeisthebestlife #marriedliferocks #husbandandwifeteam #husbandandwifeforlife #marriageiswork #dateyourspouse #loveyourspouse #healthymarriage #marriagetips #imagotherapysavedtheirrelationshipnowtheyhelpotherstrugglingcouples What You'll Learn by Watching This Podcast:Fighting in your marriage is not a sign to call it quitsConflict means you married the right personCommunication works best when there is no blame or shameSafe communication is everythingWithout commitment there is no hopeQuotes:“We take our baggage with us no matter where we go so it's not necessarily going to be better with somebody else.” 16:11 - 16:16“And commitment can be a relief to people like maybe myself who's more emotional and we can catastrophize things - 17:55 - 18:05“We learned to be respectful of each other's time and space, careful of the way we say things to each other.” 19:47- 19:53“We'll also share some things that we appreciate about each other and make sure we're looking into each other's eyes not just walking from one room to the next and when we do that it feels so good. It calms me down.

As an attorney, Igor Meystelman saw many couples pursuing divorce. In his own personal life, after a fateful and explosive conflict with his wife, he discovered Imago Therapy, which helped his conquer obstacles in his own marriage and exponentially strengthen the bond between himself and his spouse. Despite his career aspirations, he decided to take on learning the skills needed to become a Certified Imago Facilitator to allow couples seeking divorce the alternate option of reuniting with Imago therapy to foster rehabilitation and spousal harmony.In this first episode of two part series, Igor reveals how he came to discover how Imago isn't typical therapy. Although its power has the latent ability to overcome tremendous barriers, heal years of unintentional abuse and gain true wisdom, it is most effective when both participants are willing and ready to grow together, to heal and unite. In unimaginable ways, Imago provides the critical tools needed to mend years of chronic dispute and allows each participant to finally feel what their partner has felt all along. In their continuing journey, both participants can adapt new methods of truly understanding their spouses in a healthy and loving way and achieve a true love that comes from a place of safety, deep understanding, empathy and trust.Stay tuned for part 2 of this captivating episode which Igor details how Imago works and its transformative power.If you need more support in your mental health journey please reach out to us in our private Facebook group. We also offer free 30-minute fitting calls for our coaching program. You do not have to walk through your mental health struggle alone. Because as always, together is better!—————————————————————————Connect with Igor:https://www.relationshipreimagined.comFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100006067605298IG: https://www.instagram.com/dmd_conversation/Igor's Podcast on Spotify:https://open.spotify.com/show/0wghT0Q150cP7hovP0BHLV?si=dd1746c660574dc1Igor's Podcast on Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/dating-marriage-and-divorce-conversations-dmd/id1575285240—————————————————————————Topics Discussed:Healing and mending relationships with Imago TherapySympathy versus empathySeeing your partners from their perspectiveBringing your past into the present with a safe partnerPersonal Growth through facing your inner voice—————————————————————————Quotes:“like most of the families just kind of on the fly, trying to survive. I was in the thick of my career.” @Igor Meystelman @MatanaJacobs #HopetoRecharge“it's a little spooky, but that first session we walked out, I said, Laura, we have to come back.” @Igor Meystelman @MatanaJacobs #HopetoRecharge“I remember I paused, I didn't feel upset at her. I wasn't angry. I just supposedly said, what am I doing wrong” @Igor Meystelman @MatanaJacobs #HopetoRecharge“It's all about learning what the other person likes, how to communicate and how to express and how to hold space for the other person's pain or desire or understanding” @Igor Meystelman @MatanaJacobs #HopetoRecharge—————————————————————————If you need more support in your mental health journey please reach out to us in our private Facebook group. We also offer free 30-minute fitting calls for our coaching program. You do not have to walk through your mental health struggle alone. Because as always, together is better!There is no substitute for a listening ear. Get Your Free 30 Minute Consultation Today.http://www.hopetorecharge.com/1on1—————————————————————————Interested in joining our monthly Mastermind?Find out more info here! http://www.hopetorecharge.com/Mastermind—————————————————————————Suicide Hotlines:USA: 1-800-273-8255USA Crisis (Text): 741-741Canada: 1-833-456-4566United Kingdom: 116-123Australia: 13-11-14International Suicide Hotlines:https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_suicide_crisis_lines—————————————————————————Connect with us!Website: https://hopetorecharge.com/Private Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/2079694042156503/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/matanajacobs/—————————————————————————3 WAYS THAT YOU CAN HELP THE PODCAST:1) Subscribe via iTunes and leave a review. It costs nothing. https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/hope-to-recharge/id1464788845—————————————————————————2) Spread the word via social media. It costs nothing.Website: https://hopetorecharge.com/Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/2079694042156503/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/matanajacobs/—————————————————————————3) Subscribe to us on:iTunes: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/hope-to-recharge/id1464788845Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/00AIhRZOxKNOvenz32gGeKStitcher: https://www.stitcher.com/podcast/heather-parady-2/hope-to-rechargeYoutube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC_DkYMcco7pSrkKk6wU5p7w—————————————————————————Today's episode of Hope to Recharge is sponsored by https://www.relationshipreimagined.com Real transformation requires deep and meaningful work. You and your spouse/partner commit 12 weeks of your lives to meaningful and deep work on your relationship. In exchange, you will walk away with incredible and proven tools that will continue to serve you and enhance your relationships for the rest of your lives. In addition, the skills you will learn and integrate are transferable, and can be applied in many of your personal and professional relationships. By going through this transformation, you will not just reinvent your romantic relationship, but you will create for yourself the possibility to be an agent of change with many of the people you interact with.Get a free discovery call and free 30 minute session today. Visit https://www.relationshipreimagined.com and ask about our Romantic Relationship 12 Week Course.—————————————————————————Today's episode of Hope to Recharge is also sponsored by https://Maxifyz.com/ and https://Betterhelp.com/hopetorecharge. Maxifyz.com provides doctor formulated, lab certified, USA grown high quality CBD oils, tinctures and 100% legal Hemp products to reduce anxiety and stress, provide muscle relaxation and help to get a better night's sleep. Use coupon code HOPE to get 10% off your order plus free shipping.Betterhelp.com is the world's leading provider of online therapy. Their mission is to make professional counseling accessible, affordable, and convenient, so anyone who struggles with life's challenges can get help, anytime, anywhere. Head to https://Betterhelp.com/hopetorecharge for 10% off your first month of services. IMPORTANT: Be sure to click this link in order to get the 10% off code.Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/hope-to-recharge/donationsAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

All relationships are important regardless of the type of relationship…In this episode of 2 CHICKS & A MIC, we talk about the force in building relationships and the importance of meeting new people and networking.When you meet new people what works for you to keep relationships for a long period of time? There is a lot that comes with making relationships work. IN THIS EPISODE, I TALK ABOUT:Do you have the gifting a receiving energy when you make new relationships?How much is too much when trying to make a relationship work?How to approach meeting new people.The importance of following up with your connections. If you loved this episode, it would mean the world to me if you SUBSCRIBED to the podcast on your favorite podcast app and give it a 5 star review. I would be forever grateful! Thank you!!  ✅  CLASSES:“UNSTUCK YOUR MONEY” In-Person Workshop in Los Angeles: SUNDAY, JUNE 5TH: DM me on Instagram with the word: UNSTUCK and get the latest notices when my classes open up!  ​​ ✅  RESOURCES:Text: CREATE to 323-524-9857 to apply for my Get Up Girl Gang community If you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating  and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser and Castbox. ✅  LET'S CONNECT:The Get Up GirlInstagramFacebookMonthly online fitness academy 

Jade Bryce is a former MMA ring girl, model, and actress who has grown into her spiritual calling through deep work. Jade is unabashedly open and shares without reservation. She has spent the better part of her life seeking answers to her darkness, bravely navigating through her pain, re-parenting herself, and reaching for an always illusive sense of self-mastery. As an experienced psychonaut, intuitive, and student of the psyche, she's stepping into her inner shaman, while creating and claiming the undeniable abundance surrounding her. Now, as the host of the top-ranked podcast Untamed & Unashamed, she is a world-renowned sacred space holder and a prolific healer who shares HER story of trauma and rising and hones her intuitive abilities to be a deeper witness for others.   **This podcast is sensitive in nature and contains sexually explicit content that may be disturbing to some. If you've got children in the room or if you have been affected by sexual abuse, you may choose to skip this one.    Thought Roomies- I just started a Telegram channel a few days ago!!  More than 100+ you have already joined this free community where you'll receive my daily musings, poetry, playlists, meditations, insights, live streams, and more! Want to get into my inner circle? Click here → https://t.me/hallie_rose ←    If You Enjoy The Thought Room Please Subscribe and Give Us a 5-Star Rating ★★★★★ and Review on Apple Podcasts or give us a shoutout on Instagram with your favorite moment from this episode for a chance to be re-shared. Find me on Instagram @hallie_rosebud and @thoughtroompodcast.  If the Thought Room means something to you, I want to know.  Your voice means the world, and YOU matter to me.  Please consider writing me a line or two, or share your excitement by tapping the link below.    ↓Quick link to leave some ♥ LOVE ♥  for The Thought Room: ↓    → https://kite.link/Review ←  As a thank you, download my free gift to you: 5 Minutes to Freedom Meditation  https://www.hallierose.com/meditation This episode is sponsored by: 3rd Eye Cacao:  Click here —> https://thirdeyecacao.com/thoughtroom Use the coupon code “THOUGHTROOM” for 15% off!   Why cacao? As an excellent alternative to coffee, cacao is rich in theobromine, a native relative to caffeine. Theobromine's heart-opening effects energize the body and elevate the mood.  Third Eye Cacao is organically grown, hand picked and sun-dried. Just boil water— Third Eye Cacao is easy enough for your morning ritual, and pure enough to be used for cacao ceremonies! (Check out Ep. 40 with Third Eye Founder, Neil Ryan Dumra).    Somatic Release Breathwork:  Click here —> Somatic Release Breathwork Training with Steven Jaggers Use the coupon code “THOUGHTROOM” for $200 off in-person or online training!   Upgraded Formulas:  Click here —> https://www.upgradedformulas.com/ Use the coupon code “THOUGHTROOM” for 15% off!   Topics Explored:    5:36: How Jade's harrowing upbringing in an abusive home Embracing our inner voice and psychic abilities  Sexual abuse, complex PTSD, depression, and suicidal ideation Sexual suppression as a result of trauma Leaving her marriage and pursuing modeling and acting Her experience living in the Playboy Mansion How she went from being an exhibitionist out of rebellion to being an exhibitionist for love 24:49: Imago Therapy and Inner Child Work How our inner child manifests in our adult partnerships Reframing our idea of home to find healthy partnerships 27:30: The life-changing importance of mentorship  Allowing ourselves to be open to trust  32:12: Plant medicine as a vessel for fast-forwarding healing from sexual trauma and shame How choosing a name or brand can be a source of initiation and becoming How Jade's choice of “Untamed & Unashamed” helped her come into her body How Hallie's choice of “The Thought Room” stemmed from a powerful realization in a plant medicine ceremony The healing power of sisterhood  43:23: Finding sexual healing and liberation in being confidently vulnerable Overcoming the shame associated with female pleasure and periods to reclaim our power and feel worthy of pleasure  Jade's daily pleasure practice and embracing of her body's sex magic Pussy Juice Perfume! The power of orgasm to boost creativity and confidence 52:25: The different ways men and women wield their sexual energy Resources for men and women looking to work on sexual healing How men and women can experience multiple orgasms Strategies and exercises for rewriting our sexual narrative to heal from trauma Resources:   Jade on IG| @thejadebryce  Untamed & Unashamed | Podcast Dr. Ann Wexler | Website Mary Margrave | Website The Body Keeps The Score by Bessel van der Kolk, M.D. Come As You Are by Emily Nagoski The Multi-Orgasmic Man by Mantak Chia & Douglas Abrams The Multi-Orgasmic Couple by Mantak Chia & Maneewan Chia, Douglas Abrams & Rachel Carlton Abrams The Multi-Orgasmic Woman by Mantak Chia & Rachel Carlton Abrams Urban Tantra by Barbara Carrellas Aphrodite's Daughters by Jalaha Bonheim Womb Wisdom by Padma Aon Prakasha Justin Patrick Pierce | Website The Awakened Woman's Guide To Everlasting Love by Londin Angel Winters and Justin Patrick Pierce David Deida | Website Jamie Wheal | Website Pussy: A Reclamation by Mama Gena Layla Martin | Twitter Tantric Alchemy | Website   Connect with Hallie Rose: Thought Room IG | https://www.instagram.com/thoughtroompodcast/  Hallie Rose IG | https://www.instagram.com/hallie_rosebud/   YouTube |http://bit.ly/ThoughtRoomYouTube  Website | www.thoughtroompodcast.com    WAYS TO SUPPORT THIS SHOW!    → SUBSCRIBE: Apple, Spotify, YouTube     → LEAVE A SHORT APPLE PODCASTS REVIEW: https://kite.link/Review  Would you please consider leaving a typed review on Apple Podcasts? It takes less than 60 seconds and even a line or two makes a really big difference in helping to land prominent guests and help others discover the show!    →  SHARE: Spread the word! Text a friend this episode!  Tag @hallie_rosebud @thoughtroompodcast on your IG story or feed

Rabbi Shlomo Slatkin Better Relationships, Better Life with Judy Herman Episode 014: No Blame, No Shame Rabbi Shlomo Slatkin is a Licensed Clinical Professional Counselor and the founder of The Marriage Restoration Project, where couples find new hope & create a happier, deeper connection in 2 days with his “No Blame, No Shame” couples therapy & workshops. Rabbi Slatkin is a Licensed Clinical Professional Counselor, a Certified Imago Relationship Therapist, a Rabbi, and a father of 5. He is an advanced Clinician in Imago Therapy and Getting the Love You Want ™ Workshop Presenter.     Listen to this insightful episode of Better Relationships, Better Life, full of relationship and parenting advice:   Here is what to expect on this week's show: How Rabbi Shlomo and his wife Rivka turned their experience with Imago therapy into the foundational guide for the Marriage Restoration Project Why connection and a feeling of safety are key to open and honest communication in a relationship Where Rabbi Shlomo thinks people who feel like Imago therapy hasn't worked for them should start looking Ways in which the different stages of parenting can impact a relationship over time What to do if one partner is doing more work on the relationship than the other  Connect with Shlomo, Rivka, and the Marriage Restoration Project: WEBSITE: https://themarriagerestorationproject.com/ FACEBOOK: https://www.facebook.com/themarriagerestorationproject/ TWITTER: https://twitter.com/shlomoslatkin INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/marriagerestorationproject/ Relationship Stress Quiz - https://www.judycounselor.com Complimentary Clarity Call - https://JudyKHerman.as.me/Complimenta... Linked In - https://www.linkedin.com/in/judykherman/  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Have you ever felt like you were called to do more? What about how your childhood shows up in your relationships? You never know where you will be when you get “the calling,” so it is almost impossible to prepare for it. But everyone, at one point in their life, will be called for something more. They will get that deep gut feeling that it is time to step up into a bigger version of themselves. The most important job you have is to listen and heed that advice.Jamice A. Holley, holds a Masters's in Clinical Mental Health and is the founder of The Art of Becoming LLC. She's a therapist who specializes in supporting her clients as they successfully navigate their relationships through the Imago Relationship Therapy process. Whether it is working on their most important relationship, the one with themselves, or the one with their partner, as a Minister and Clinician, Holley approaches the healing and growth process from a mental, emotional, and spiritual perspective to achieve impactful and lasting results. Holley's private practice is called The Art of Becoming. Her mission is to empower other people to listen and align to that inner “yes.” To get in alignment with their highest purpose and to pick up the skills, that don't come naturally to learn how to navigate their life successfully.In this episode, we discuss the following:The shedding process of becoming the best version of youHow unhealed childhood wounds show up In marriageWhy your marriage deserves the healed youAnd moreConnect with TamikaShop Ageless Apparel: https://www.tamikamctier.com/apparelPre-order book: https://www.tamikamctier.com/authorJOIN THE AGELESS CONVERSATIONS PRIVATE FACEBOOK COMMUNITYhttps://www.facebook.com/groups/550719606378413Connect with JamiceWebsite: www.theabcllc.org  

Wherever you stand on the idea of Valentine's Day, attending to romance in your relationship is important for at least two reasons: to keep the relationship alive, exciting and fun and to continue deepening the connection between you. Ideally you pay attention to romance not just one day in the year but throughout your relationship.Romance has different connotations for everybody; we all like to be romanced in different ways.  For some people romance is more closely associated with the idea of excitement, mystery and passion; for others it is about the deep, steady and safe bond of love.Our way of thinking about romance is influenced by the Romantic period in the 18th/19th century. As an antidote to the previous period of rationalism key features of the Romantic period where a celebration of the emotional, spontaneous, imaginative, the irrational and the mysterious often set in wild natural locations that mirrored the hero's emotional state. Think of Emily Bronte's Wuthering Height with the doomed lovers compelled to continue falling into each other's arms in the blustery winds of the Yorkshire Moors.Romantic gestures make ordinary life extraordinary. They emphasise what is special about the person you love and what attracted you to your partner in the first place. Being romantic means being attentive to your partner, showing them your care and love and noticing their love in return. Romance often takes you back to the early stages of the relationship where you were  falling in love as opposed to staying in love. These intensely pleasurable feelings of love can be conjured up when you decide to focus on them. Visual cues such as photos from this period may help you recall the honeymoon period. In this episode we talk you through an exercise in Imago Therapy by Harville Hendrix that helps you to re-romanticise your relationship to create greater and more loving connection with your partner. And finally... we love seeing our audience grow across the globe. The top cities where most of our listeners live are currently Alpharetta (US), Los Angeles (US), New York (US), Brisbane (Australia), Melbourne (Australia), Calgary (Canada), Gabarone (Botswana), Frankfurt (Germany) and the small town of  Dyserth (UK).  Big shout out to all of you! We really appreciate your support. Email us to let us know if there are any particular topics you would like to see us talk about: info@therelationshipmaze.com.For more information on each podcast go to The Relationship Maze podcast website. And to find out more about our online course on relationships go to The Relationship Maze.

Let's talk about Step 3 in the Behavioral Change Stairway: Rapport, Imago Therapy, Rumi, and killer koalas. Never Split the Difference | Book Therapy with Chris Voss by Corey Bennett Boardman CLIP

In an effort to get word out about the podcast as a resource to the Austin area community, I am currently raising funds to advertise on KUT! Please consider making a donation to the GoFundMe for this endeavor at gf.me/u/zrakdh   This week's episode features Nichole Hart on Imago Therapy.   Nichole's practice website: https://www.hartcounselingservices.com/   Theme song credit: "NextQuestion" by Greer Culbertson, LCSW-- lyrics, guitar, and vocals and Landon Laws-- drums   Sound Engineer: Amanda Justice   The interview process on this show is based entirely on the concept of consent in which an interviewee may choose to pass on any question at any time by simply saying "NextQuestion." No questions asked.    Thank you for listening to NextQuest Podcast. I learned something new today and I hope you did too. Stay tuned for next episode featuring Melissa Hargrave, LMFT-S, LPC-S who will be talking about her practice and area of specialty, Sexual Anxiety. NextQuest Podcast relies solely on donations to keep this project going. Please consider making a donation via Venmo to username @NQCATX or by buying me a coffee at https://www.buymeacoffee.com/nxtquestpodcast

In an effort to get word out about the podcast as a resource to the Austin area community, I am currently raising funds to advertise on KUT! Please consider making a donation to the GoFundMe for this endeavor at gf.me/u/zrakdh   This week's episode features Cyndi Collen, LCSW-S, CMHIMP on Integrative Psychotherapy.   Cyndi's practice website: https://flourishinaustin.com/ Cyndi's Non Profit, Mindful Wellness Center of Austin: https://www.mindfulwellnessaustin.org/   Theme song credit: "NextQuestion" by Greer Culbertson, LCSW-- lyrics, guitar, and vocals and Landon Laws-- drums   Sound Engineer: Amanda Justice   The interview process on this show is based entirely on the concept of consent in which an interviewee may choose to pass on any question at any time by simply saying "NextQuestion." No questions asked.    Thank you for listening to NextQuest Podcast. I learned something new today and I hope you did too. Stay tuned for next episode featuring Nichole Hart, LPC who will be talking about her practice and area of specialty, Imago Therapy. NextQuest Podcast relies solely on donations to keep this project going. Please consider making a donation via Venmo to username @NQCATX or by buying me a coffee at https://www.buymeacoffee.com/nxtquestpodcast

In this week's episode, I speak with Amy Bucciere, who is a therapist focused on relationships and sex therapy with a particular specialization in Imago therapy and EMDR. I really enjoyed getting the chance to explore the complexity of relationships, how the nature of relationships can change, whether the transactional lens is a useful one to assess relationships, and discussing what Imago Therapy is with Amy. We also touched on the idea that the term itself carries some baggage and it's important to think about any connections with other people as relationships. The word isn't just for families or partners. Learn more about Amy here

In this episode, Gymnazo Co-Owners, Michael and Paden Hughes, sit down to discuss their experience running a successful fitness business while starting and maintaining their relationship, and how Paden went from feeling like “Compromise” was a 4 letter word to now Michael taking over the CEO role.  In this episode they cover how their relationship started, the important thing Michael paid for early on, the importance of understanding personality traits to be able to effectively communicate, what didn't go so well for them, and tips for  navigating this situation and still being happily married. Links for items mentioned in this episode: - Enneagram: https://www.enneagraminstitute.com/rheti (https://www.enneagraminstitute.com/rheti) - Human Design: https://www.jovianarchive.com/get_your_chart (https://www.jovianarchive.com/get_your_chart) - Imago Therapy: https://harvilleandhelen.com/initiatives/what-is-imago/ (https://harvilleandhelen.com/initiatives/what-is-imago/) Here's a quick preview of this episode: 2:36 Where Michael was in his business when he first thought Paden should start working with him 11:11 The important thing Michael paid for early on 12:51 Shouldn't a coach have a coach? 17:20 Michael's strengths and a discussion about personality traits  22:18 Paden's strengths 24:31 Michael and Paden's tug-of-war about the spotlight and how Michael feels about it 29:26 The Trial Period of Paden working for Gymnazo 32:26 Imposter syndrome 33:09 CEO status and Ego compromise 37:09 Big tips for working with your significant other 40:47 What didn't go so well for Paden and Michael 1:03:51 Tools and tips Paden and Michael used to navigate this situation and still be happily married 1:15:06 What Paden and Michael would do differently

In this episode, Gymnazo Co-Owners, Michael and Paden Hughes, sit down to discuss their experience running a successful fitness business while starting and maintaining their relationship, and how Paden went from feeling like “Compromise” was a 4 letter word to now Michael taking over the CEO role. In this episode they cover how their relationship started, the important thing Michael paid for early on, the importance of understanding personality traits to be able to effectively communicate, what didn't go so well for them, and tips for navigating this situation and still being happily married.Links for items mentioned in this episode:- Enneagram: https://www.enneagraminstitute.com/rheti- Human Design: https://www.jovianarchive.com/get_your_chart- Imago Therapy: https://harvilleandhelen.com/initiatives/what-is-imago/Here's a quick preview of this episode:2:36 Where Michael was in his business when he first thought Paden should start working with him11:11 The important thing Michael paid for early on12:51 Shouldn't a coach have a coach?17:20 Michael's strengths and a discussion about personality traits 22:18 Paden's strengths24:31 Michael and Paden's tug-of-war about the spotlight and how Michael feels about it29:26 The Trial Period of Paden working for Gymnazo32:26 Imposter syndrome33:09 CEO status and Ego compromise37:09 Big tips for working with your significant other40:47 What didn't go so well for Paden and Michael1:03:51 Tools and tips Paden and Michael used to navigate this situation and still be happily married1:15:06 What Paden and Michael would do differently

In this episode, Candace picks Nathan's brain about ALL THINGS RELATIONSHIPS. Nathan openly shares the ups and downs in his relationship with wife Christina and how they, after almost two decades together, are the best of friends and have a strong, connected relationship.Bio After graduating from the University of Central Arkansas in 1997 with a degree in Business Administration, Nathan joined Salter Construction, Inc., to continue a legacy in the construction industry. He began his career as an apprentice in the plumbing industry and has held a number of positions during his career at Salter, including job superintendent, project manager, and estimator. In 2011, Nathan was named President, and assigned a leadership role with responsibility for setting and implementing the strategic direction of the company. As a Salter leader, Nathan's goal is to have the company recognized by clients as delivering the highest standards of service in the industry, while making Salter a great place to work.Links:Nathan on IGEngage Management on IGSalter Construction Inc.Engage Management Follow Candace on IG 

'Know Thyself', this ancient saying encourages us to go in search of a deeper level of self-understanding - In today's episode we explore why knowing yourself matters in the context of relationships. Couples are often surprised that their partner 'changed' over time. One or two years down the line you may think that your partner is not the person you thought they would be. You may notice that they are not as patient, cuddly, understanding or present as you want them to be. The ideal partner from the honeymoon days seems to have disappeared. The disappointment with the partner frequently results in a mutual blame game. What many couples fail to acknowledge is their own perspective and their own expectations. It helps to know your own starting point. What are your thoughts about relationships? What do you expect from your partner? And how do you respond to disappointments? Your ideas about relationships have been formed over a long period of time, starting in your childhood. You would have learned how relationships work (or don't work) and you would have developed all sorts of ideas about other people and the world in general. There would have been some disappointments along the way and an unconscious desire to find the one person who can make everything alright for you. For example, if you struggle with low confidence you may wish for a partner who reassures you and makes you feel good about yourself. If you partner struggles to do this all the time, you may feel disappointed and over a long period of time you may get very frustrated. We often choose our partners (unconsciously) to heal old wounds from the past. We have expectations of our partner that may be realistic or may be completely impossible to meet. Bringing our wishes and expectations into our awareness can help us to articulate what it is that we need and enables us to review our expectations. Can your partner really over everything to you? Are there some expectations that may need reviewing? So, ask yourself, what you want and need from a relationship? How would you know that you are in the relationship that you need?

This week I thought I’d touch very briefly on a concept that helped me understand a LOT of things about my romantic relationships and my marriage to David. The “imago” relationship theory developed by Dr. Harville Hendrix and Dr. Helen LaKelly Hunt appears in their joint-authored book “Getting the Love You Want: A Guide for Couples,” and it’s been formally codified as IRT, Imago Relationship Therapy. The word “imago” is derived from the Latin for “image,” referring to the unconscious image of “similar love,” or love that recreates early childhood experiences. If people in love say to each other, “it’s like I’ve known you forever,” it’s because, in a way, they do. Hendrix and Hunt found that when people seek romantic partners, they unconsciously recreate their childhood scenarios and the relationship they had with their parents. This often leads to unconsciously attempting to fix in their present relationship the things that were lacking in their past as a child (see episode 78) — not necessarily because they enjoy being attracted to people who are like one or the other of their parents or caregivers, but because it’s familiar. As we recognize that our unconscious mind, informed by past relationships, is partially responsible for determining who we’re attracted to and why, we should both be aware and beware of unconscious roadblocks in our relationship path. I realized early on that if my siblings or friends suggested I do this or that thing, I could do it with no sweat — but if David asked me to do the same thing the same way, I felt reprimanded! I felt not-good-enough! It was like I was a child again, and it wasn’t even David’s doing! Says psychologist Carl Jung (and I’m loosely paraphrasing here), “until we know our unconscious mind, it will direct our life and we will call it fate.” Remember that what your parents said and did in their interactions with you and how they treated you was not a reflection of your worth but a projection of their own insecurities upon you (see episode 45). As you become aware of this and aware of your own imago dynamic in your relationship, you will be able to more clearly see and meet your own needs, which in turn will help you meet your spouse’s needs and your children’s needs. You’ve got this! Subscribe on Apple! Subscribe on Android! Join my FREE parenting bootcamp! Let’s Connect! Here’s where you can find me: Learn more at https://www.coachingkelly.com. Find me on Instagram! Find me on Facebook!

Ep 49:  Secret Keys to Good Communication with Alicia Muñoz What does it mean to cultivate beginner's mind with our partner? How do we balance being true to ourselves with flexibility and being open to our partner's influence? What are some secret keys we can bring to our conversations? Find out in this week's episode of The Learn to Love Podcast, where your host Zach Beach interviews counselor, couples therapist and author Alicia Muñoz on Secret Keys to Good Communication . Learn more about your guest below: Alicia Muñoz is I'm a licensed professional counselor and a certified couples therapist with training in Imago Therapy, CBT, and Dyanmic Pyschotherapy. She has worked in a wide array of clinical settings over the past fourteen years, including private clinics, New York City's Bellevue Hospital, and private practice. She is the author of “No More Fighting,” “A Year of Us,” and her most recent work is, The Couple's Quiz Book: 350 Fun Questions to Energize Your Relationship. Learn more at  - https://aliciamunoz.com/ - https://www.facebook.com/aliciamunozlpc - https://twitter.com/aliciamunozlpc - https://www.linkedin.com/in/aliciamunozlpc/ - https://www.instagram.com/aliciamunozcouples/ Learn more about your host and the show at: www.zachbeach.com www.the-heart-center.com Like us on Facebook: facebook.com/learntolovenow Join the Community group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/1428012130828678/

In todays episode my guest is Dr. Tanya Martin, PsyD , Clinical Therapist and certified Imago Therapist . Dr. Martin shares her expertise about relationships and how Imago Therapy helps to heal relationships. She shares how relationship choices are based on our attractions to earlier relationships with our caregivers. If you want to learn how to communicate more effectively listen as Dr, Martin shares examples of how couples can learn to communicate better. Are you in need of coaching or counseling for anxiety, depression or having relationship problems? You can find me at my website, (www.empoweringserenity.net ) or follow me on Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/connieakinslpc/and join my Facebook page https://www.facebook.com/empoweringserenityandguidance and locate me on the Therapy for Black Girls website for counseling. Please subscribe, rate, and review the podcast and help Connie Akins increase the number of views and listeners. Please share and thanks for your suppor

Imagine how much deeper and richer our relationships could be, not just with our partners, but our family members, and friends, if we were consciously aware of and compassionate towards the wounds and triggers they've had that have caused them respond to life the way that they do. Imagine how much more we could show up for them in ways they need, and help to provide them with the kind of love that brings them healing and assurance. And imagine how lovely that would feel to have that in return. Duane and Thea Harvey are both licensed Marriage & Family Therapists and certified Imago Relationship Therapists. In this episode, Courtney talks with the couple specifically about Imago Therapy, which is a type of couple's therapy that is designed to transform conflict by identifying early childhood wounds in each partner and working together to find healing and resolve. | Duane and Thea Harvey, MA, MFTs | Instagram | @duaneharvey, @theaharvey Website | https://harveycenterforrelationships.com | Courtney Cole | ► The Love Freq Podcast | https://tinyurl.com/y2kaye4h ► Website | https://tinyurl.com/yxvrg6mu ► Exclusive Love Freq Content | https://tinyurl.com/y6mqau6x ► Courtney's Music | https://tinyurl.com/y4abajyd | Connect with Courtney | ►Website | https://tinyurl.com/yxvrg6mu ►Instagram | https://tinyurl.com/y3sth85a ►Facebook | https://tinyurl.com/yxnrb7ck ►Twitter | https://tinyurl.com/yx93y7hv --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/thelovefreqpodcast/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/thelovefreqpodcast/support

In this episode, you’ll learn how contributing to an anthology, coordinating an anthology, writing children’s workbooks, Brainspotting, Imago Therapy, and more, all come together to create a story of helping others in the community. Our guest is Brooke Randolph, founder, and director of Counseling at The Green House and a bestselling author of several books. She is a certified Imago Relationship Therapist and a certified Brainspotting therapist & Consultant. The four “fun nuggets” from this interview are: #1: Understand that there might be a difference in how others view your primary legacy and how you view your own (and that’s okay!). #2: Recognize that organizing an anthology can be potentially more work than writing one’s own book! (Anthology I just contributed to and discussed during this interview: https://www.amazon.com/Soul-Success-Stories-lessons-leaders/dp/1662900112/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=soul+success&qid=1592246166&sr=8-1). #3: Collect stories over time to create your own “story bank” (a creative gold mine!). #4: Get to know your “faces of resistance” (to having a bigger voice and reaching more people on a larger platform) so that you can move beyond these obstacles. About Brooke Randolph Brooke Randolph, LMHC, is founder and director of Counseling at The Green House. She is the author of The Bully Book: A Workbook for Kids Coping with Bullies (2016), The Loss Book: A Workbook for Kids Coping with Loss (2017), The Choices Book: A Workbook for Kids (2019), a contributing author to Adoption Therapy: Perspectives from Clients and Clinicians on Processing and Healing Post-Adoption Issues (2014), and the organizing editor of It's Not About You: Understanding Adoptee Search, Reunion, & Open Adoption (2017). She has also authored adoption education materials. 
 Brooke's specialties are Adoption, Brainspotting, and relationships. She is a certified Imago Relationship Therapist, a certified Brainspotting therapist & Consultant, Coordinator for Brainspotting Indy, and a member of the US Brainspotting Association Leadership Team. She was a founding member of MLJ Adoptions, Inc., where she served as the VP of Social Services for seven years. She was a Young Professionals Advisory Board member for The Villages, Indiana’s largest not-for-profit child and family services agency, and she was the mental health expert contributor at DietsInReview.com, a national diet and fitness column. 
 Brooke has presented at numerous conferences and workshops throughout North America on a variety of topics. Brooke is primarily motivated to encourage, equip, and empower individuals and couples toward more whole-hearted living and conscious relationships. LINKS Affiliate link for Teachable www.brooke-randolph.com www.brooke-randolph.teachable.com www.greenhouseindy.com/counseling www.brainspottingindy.org https://instagram.com/brookerandolphlmhc/ http://facebook.com/BrookeRandolphLMHC https://twitter.com/BRandolphLMHC

Rabbi Shlomo Slatkin is a Licensed Clinical Professional Counselor and a Certified Imago Relationship Therapist. In this episode, we talk about Imago Therapy, how to build a successful marriage, and how to grow personally when you are in a relationship.

"Any time we reduce the shaming of men, it's a good thing." -Dovid Feldman It's always a particular pleasure to entertain a guest with similar clinical expertise on the Fox Den. Dovid Feldman is a licensed marriage & family therapist and rabbi, whose passion for helping his clients develop positive communication is obvious and energizing. His excitement suffused the Fox Den with it's charisma. Dovid shares his passion for Imago Therapy, a relationship counseling approach which follows the principle, "we are attracted to that which we wish to have," whether confidence or other personal qualities.  Feldman and I address the pornography controversy which spread as a viral conversation via Twitter, bringing clinical opinions and expertise to this subject.  Listen to this and more, on this extremely potent episode. You won't be disappointed with the considerable psychotherapeutic acumen and wisdom distilled for your auditory pleasure. Find Dovid:  online: https://dovidfeldman.com/ on his podcast: https://dovidfeldman.com/impassioned-marriage-podcast/ on his blog: https://dovidfeldman.com/blog/ and of course, on Twitter: https://twitter.com/dovidfeldman

EPISODE 42: FROM CONFLICT TO OPPORTUNITY Flourishing Friday (FF)- Welcome to Flourishing Fridays, where every Friday we bring you a Positive Psychology based life hack that will help you to flourish…  We look at real life application of positive psychology, while giving you different strategies, tips and steps to put Positive Psychology into all areas of your life. Are you triggered by a human being?  Are there any relationships that bring out relation-shit?  The people closest to us are a source of our well-being.  Imago relationship therapy is a form of couples therapy or counselling that helps those in committed relationships work out misunderstandings, reduce conflict, and rediscover ways to  bond, communicate, and find common ground.  Discover how positive psychology can help with transforming conflict into an opportunity to grow and heal in your relationships. The goal of Imago Therapy is to help you see the person you're in a partnership with as a mirror or reflection that can help you grow to fulfill your life purpose. See dynamic as an opportunity to help you grow. This shift in perspective can help conflict within relationships become opportunity for healing and growth. The term imago is Latin for “image” and, with this perspective it is a chance to see your relationships as self-reflections and a chance to investigate feelings and grow.  In this episode, Emiliya offers some wonderful tips to help you FLOURISH in your relationships.  Take on the perspective people are there to support your growth and flourishing!  For Full show notes & more information on what we have to offer,  visit The Flourishing Center at:  www.theflourishingcenter.com

In Dr. Tari Mack's interview we discuss: The common themes around communication she sees when she does couples therapy How to communicate your needs and feelings to your partner Tips for how to handle the same conversations/conflicts in a different way Getting your spouse to respond instead of ract How each person in the relationship is taking a part in the dynamic that is creating the conflict Using I statements as a way to not put your partner on the defensive Imago Therapy and how to feel heard in your relationship The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse (by John Gottman) and how using criticism, stonewalling, defensiveness, and contempt when interacting with your spouse is a predictor of divorce Suggestions for how to stay connected to your spouse while dealing with the stress of small children and other household obligations Identifying when you've been emotionally triggered and what to do about it Visit www.themodernmomsociety.com/episode20 to access the show notes and additional words of wisdom on motherhood from Tari. Dr. Tari Mack is a clinical psychologist and relationship expert. She works with individuals and couples in her private practice and is passionate about helping people find purpose and fulfillment. She loves helping couples deepen their connection with each other and figure out how to move past recurring conflicts. She is a mom to 2 daughters, ages 5 and 2.5. Tari has a blog, The Path of Joy, and she is also writing a book for dating singles about how to find your soulmate and remove your roadblocks to finding love. Stay tuned for that!

Maamar Ki Senuah Leah 5572 #2: This class, on the Maamar Einyan Ki Senuah Leah 5572 #2, was presented on 12 Kislev, 5777, December 16, 2016, at Ohr Chaim, Monsey, NY. We Search for Leah, but we do not know it. We think we want Rachel; really we want Leah. But if we would know it, we would never want it, because it opens us up to our deeper, unresolved issues.

To say Evie Shafner knows her stuff would be an understatement. She's been in practice for well over 30 years counseling individuals and couples with problems in their relationships and when I was told that she had agreed to come on to my show I was ecstatic. Now, if you don't know my interviewing process […] The post Understanding Your Breakup With Imago Therapy first appeared on Ex Boyfriend Recovery.

Listen to Bernard BacaPhD  as he describes how marriage is a developmental process that  seems to attract  the very core issues one needs to work out from one's childhood. He explains why it is essential for partners to come in with the addict as they are imperitive to the healing of the addict. Listen as Dr. Baca describes Imago Therapy which discusses the theory behind what assists clients in changing. Sexual Addiction requires specific strategies to combat the obsessive compulsive features of this disorder. Carol the Coach interviews experts in the field and clients who have found recovery strategies. She is a trained Certified Sexual Addictions Therapist who has made it her mission to educate and support listeners and their partners who are dealing with this intense disorder.