Fitz in the Morning

A nurse who brags on TikTok that she doesn’t wear a mask while traveling and having playdates with her kids gets fired, a post-Thanksgiving dinner turns deadly after someone digs into the leftovers with their bare hands, a contestant named Kovid competed on “Project Runway” in 2019 and his outfit included a mask, the mysterious monolith in Romania has now disappeared as well as the one in Utah, and the McDonald’s McRib is back and they’re offering a free one men who post pictures of newly clean-shaven faces.

Fitz has his Buddy the Elf costume in his bag today to surprise Carrie Underwood as they record the CT40 Christmas Special and we’re a little worried at how surprised she’ll be. In the What Are You Kidding Me stories, a nurse who brags on Tik Tok that she doesn’t wear a mask while traveling and having playdates with her kids gets fired, a post-Thanksgiving dinner turns deadly after someone digs into leftovers with their bare hands, a contestant named Kovid competed on “Project Runway” in 2019 and his outfit included a mask, the mysterious monolith in Romania has now disappeared as well as the one in Utah, and the McDonald’s McRib is back and they’re offering a free one men who post pictures of newly clean-shaven faces. We take your calls on where to get the Best Local Coffee including Olympia Coffee Roasting Company and Lady Bug Bikini Espresso. In the Fitz Files Justin Timberlake buys a wheelchair accessible van for a kid with Cerebral Palsy, Taylor Swift has already licensed her rerecorded “Love Story” for a commercial, a hotel in Michigan has Buddy the Elf suite, and Post Malone had a $250K made for his Dallas Cowboys. On the $1000 Minute, Linda from Sammamish goes out on #9, Charlene from Puyallup goes out on #10 but Lorie from Snohomish WINS! All Jacked Up includes Joel who told his mom the “Only Fans” charges on her credit card bill are for a celebrity chat line. “I Don’t Know the Words” Karaoke proves whether or not we really know Christmas songs like we think we do; Ryder’s “All I Want For Christmas Is You” is spectacular. People are spending less time on personal hygiene in lockdown; where do you stand on showering these days? Drew has a horrible Customer Service story but we want to hear your great ones. Today’s Troop Salute is Martin Connors of the US Army and all those who are serving away from home over the Holidays.

The mysterious metallic monolith found in Utah has vanished, scented candle makers are reporting a drop in average review rankings due to Covid loss of smell, a woman filming a TikTok video is interrupted by an intruder, a man is arrested for repeatedly calling 911 to belch into the phone, a stolen ukulele is recovered when the thief is spotted playing it in a park, and a tequila bar is dodging pandemic restrictions by registering as a church.

December means we’re that much closer to 2021! But it also means “Wham-aggedon” so watch out for “Last Christmas” to hit your ears! Listen all day Today and Wednesday as we give away an Amazon Fire every hour on the Tens! In the What Are Kidding Me stories, the mysterious metallic monolith found in Utah has vanished, scented candle makers are reporting a drop in their average review rankings due to Covid loss of smell, a woman filming a TikTok video is interrupted by an intruder, a man is arrested for repeatedly calling 911 to belch into the phone, a stolen ukulele is recovered when the thief is spotted playing it in a park and a tequila bar is dodging pandemic restrictions by registering as a church. Fitz is miffed his mother-in-law told his kids the movie “A Christmas Story” is a terrible movie before they even had a chance to watch it. A painting from 1860 has surfaced showing what appears to be a woman holding a modern iPhone – is she a time traveler? In the Fitz Files, Kelly Clarkson’s divorce is getting even uglier over custody and spousal support, Justin Bieber says he wants as many kids as his wife will “pop out” and Pink’s 9-year-old daughter is an amazing singer. On Make Up or Break Up, Danielle from Auburn is upset her boyfriend Cameron doesn’t believe that his dad straight up grabbed her butt at Thanksgiving and said “I’d like to grab them giblets”. Text The Truth has us regain your deepest, darkest secrets anonymously. Ryder actually has a little cousin named MacGuyver and we can’t believe it.

thief steals a wheel from someone’s car and leaves a frozen turkey in its place, some doctors are reporting Covid-19 may cause unexpected tooth loss, Florida Man thaws his Thanksgiving turkey in his swimming pool every year, a flight attendant is in big trouble for running a side-hustle with her “Only Fans” offerings while in-flight, a really high couple calls police several times to report possums jumping out of their fridge and microwave, and Snoop Dogg does an amazing job commentating on the Tyson-Jones and Paul-Robinson Fights, including singing a hymn for Nate Robinson after he hits the deck.

We share how the Weekend Was Going Fine Until...Claire came home to find her front door wide open and both her dogs gone…Drew’s girlfriend lost her credit card somewhere in a Christmas tree farm…Fitz’s mother-in-law got car sick…and Ryder had to get a Covid Test. In the What Are You Kidding Me stories, a thief steals a wheel from someone’s car and leaves a frozen turkey in its place, some doctors are reporting Covid-19 may cause tooth loss, Florida Man thaws his Thanksgiving turkey in his swimming pool, a flight attendant is in trouble for running a side-hustle with her “Only Fans” offerings in-flight, a really high couple calls police to report possums jumping out of their fridge and microwave, and Snoop Dogg does an amazing job commentating on the Tyson-Jones and Paul-Robinson Fights. After a Very Zoom Thanksgiving, it looks like we’re in for a Very Zoom Christmas and New Year’s Eve. In the Fitz Files “The Mandalorian” gives Baby Yoda a name and people don’t like it, Bachelorette Clare wants people to stop saying mean things to her, Morgan Wallen will be on SNL this weekend, and Vancouver, B.C. wants to name a street after Ryan Reynolds but he doesn’t what it because bad traffic will literally make him sound bad. Fitz has information about newest emojis coming out like Ninja, Toilet Plunger, and Actual Human Heart. In The Good Stuff, the Denver Broncos were facing a game with no quarterback because everyone was out with a Covid scare so an undrafted receiver who played some in college stepped up to QB for the team; also the first-ever female football player at a Power 5 School played over the weekend. Despite reports of people splitting up, many couples report getting closer to their significant other this year. Today’s Troop Salute is Jerad Sheen of the US Navy. In County Wars King County Wins the Month of November! In Food News, Ryder tells us about Pillsbury Peppermint Frosting, Kit Kat’s Birthday Cake Flavor, Pickles on Pizza as the new rage and how to make Reindeer Bait.

Drew is concerned that he pulled his Brick of Turkey out of the freezer too late for Thanksgiving. Fortunately the What Are You Kidding Me stories start with advice on how NOT to prepare your Turkey! Also on WAYKM: a new TikTok trend is kids fooling their parents into thinking the TV is broken, two Yoga teachers beat the crap out of each other over a heater, a Canadian council meeting stalls when someone’s mic is left on in the bathroom, a Oregon man is caught stealing 108 rolls of TP in Walla Walla, and a guy who stole a Coors Light truck from outside a store tries to jump out of it the moving truck and runs himself over. (You won’t believe how many P1s call in to say they’ve run themselves over.) Fitz’ has a Special Spot where he watches a massive eagle’s nest but he won’t tell anyone where it is. The Curse of Snohomish County continues for Drew who says when he asked the previous owner for information on the house she only replied “too many bad memories, I don’t want to talk about it.” Meanwhile Ryder thinks we’ve cursed him, because ever since we pointed out his 666 Facebook followers, he keep seeing satanic signs everywhere. In the Fitz Files, on “The Bachelorette” one guy tries to sneak to Tayshia’s room but ends up at host Chris Harrison’s instead and Grammy nominations are out with controversy as the Weekend didn’t get any and Justin Bieber was nominated for Pop but thinks he’s R+B. All Jacked Up includes Diana from Poulsbo who argues with Alexa and Kim in Spanaway who hides in her rabbit house when life gets too stressful. Fitz needs your advice on whether to hold his kids back a year because of all the schooling and experiences they’ve missed. And in case you missed it, we revisit our rendition of The Very First Thanksgiving.

Fitz has advice on how NOT to prepare your Turkey and how to handle leftovers, a new TikTok trend is kids fooling their parents into thinking the TV is smashed, two Yoga teachers beat the crap out of each other over a heater, a Canadian council meeting stalls when someone’s mic is on in the bathroom, a Oregon man is caught stealing 108 rolls of TP in Walla Walla, and a guy who stole a Coors Light truck from outside a store tries to jump out of the moving truck and runs himself over. (You won’t believe how many P1s call in to say they’ve run themselves over.)

The popular 12-foot-tall Halloween skeleton from Home Depot is now a popular Christmas decoration with people adding Santa stuff to it, a babysitter is being sued for getting Chicken McNuggets for the kids of a vegan family, the Oxford Dictionary Word of the Year is “Covid-19”, a squirrel staggers around drunk after eating a fermented backyard pear, Dr. Fauci’s announcement that Santa is immune to Coronavirus has internet freaks wanting to drain Santa’s plasma for his antibodies, and a guy who went to the doctor to get treatment for depression over his cheating wife finds out she was cheating with the doctor.

Drew got into an argument with his girlfriend about the proper way to make toast which got us all into a discussion about our favorite toast. Meanwhile, more than half of people surveyed say they’re writing off healthy eating and plan to pig-out from now through New Year’s Day. The Fitz in the Morning Players reenact The First Thanksgiving! In the What Are You Kidding Me stories, the popular 12-foot-tall Halloween skeleton from Home Depot is now a popular Christmas decoration, a babysitter is being sued for getting Chicken McNuggets for the kids of a vegan family, the Oxford Dictionary Word of the Year is “Covid-19”, a squirrel staggers around drunk after eating a fermented pear, Dr. Fauci’s announcement that Santa is immune to Coronavirus has internet freaks wanting to drain Santa’s plasma and a guy who went to the doctor to get treatment for depression over his cheating wife finds out she was cheating with the doctor. In the Fitz Files, Marshawn Lynch gives away 200 thanksgiving turkeys, Ken Jennings will be the first interim host for “Jeopardy”, and former “Bachelorette” Kaitlyn Bristow wins “Dancing with the Stars” making it two years in a row a former Bachelorette wins it. On the $1000 Minute, Christy from Kenmore Wins! On Make Up or Break Up, Holly from Everett just found out her boyfriend Craig lost his job two months ago and hasn’t told her. Text The Truth has you sharing your most twisted secrets with us, like the mom who realized her kid is the dumbest one in class after watching Zoom school. Fitz helps us get prepared the most Uncomfortable Conversations likely to come up at the Thanksgiving table like “when are you getting married?” and “what do you do again?” Mind Blown has hard-to-believe factoids that will, well, Blow Your Mind!

An award-winning new kit being designed England lets you grow your own steaks from human tissue (eeww!!), a 62-year-old woman is carrying her daughter’s child while is daughter is busy being pregnant with another kid, a fight at the opening for a Colorado In-N-Out Burger results in a man losing his pants, a man is arrested for spitting on hikers that aren’t wearing masks, a lab worker is arrested for forging drug test results that lost families their custody rights and Instant Karma meets a meth dealer who crashes his motorcycle and has his waistband-gun go off into his hip, and…gets hit by a car.

Today we tell you our latest Favorite Things including Fitz loving the Hot Spiced Apple Cider Drink at Starbucks, Drew loving Las Tres Marias Mexican restaurant in Monroe, Aunt Claire loving Ecos lavender scented hand soap and Ryder loving Fat Boy Rootbeer Float Freeze Pops. Claire is freaked out by a giant Krampus decoration in her neighborhood. Ryder’s Food News includes Red Lobster’s Cheddar Biscuits as Stuffing Mix! In the What Are You Kidding Me stories, a new kit design would let you grow your own steaks from human tissue, a 62-year-old woman is carrying her daughter’s child while is daughter is pregnant with another kid, a fight at the opening for a Colorado In-N-Out results in a man losing his pants, a man is arrested for spitting on hikers that aren’t wearing masks, a lab worker is arrested for forging drug test results that lost families their custody rights, and Instant Karma meets a meth dealer who crashes his motorcycle and has his waistband-gun go off into his hip. In The Good Stuff, a man rescues his puppy from the jaws of an alligator. In Fitz Files, Jon Pardi gets married, Taylor Swift misses the AMA Awards because she is rerecording her first six albums, Robert “Freddy Kruger” Englund will be on “Stranger Things Season 4”, and “Coming 2 America” will air on Amazon Prime. Fitz calls Drew out for his hurtful comments about Red Heads in Thurston County, and Young’n+Shade have a new song about Red Heads. Today’s Troop Salute is Simon Peter Hemingway of the US Army. Lee Brice calls up to talk about missing the CMA’s because of Covid-19 and the advice he gave Charles Kelly for singing his duet with Carly Pearce. Incoming “New Day Northwest” host Amity Addrisi calls in to talk about taking over for Margaret Larson, her favorite stories in the northwest, and her love for the “Flip Flop” song Fitz played last week. Monday Motivation has motivating quotes to get your week started off right.

A Burger King worker steals $30K by creating fake employees and while discussing that we learn Claire is somehow connected, a website is offering $2500 to watch 25 holiday movies in 25 days, a new study indicates the smaller a man’s junk is the more money he makes, there is special new Christmas music just for dogs (so have your dog here when you listen), a 17-year-old takes his Dad’s $3.4 million car for a joy ride and wrecks it, and a woman ticketed for using her cell phone while driving claims she was really eating an ice cream sandwich and has the wrapper and chocolate stains to prove it.

We’re all happy our Seahawks won last night at the suddenly renamed Lumen Field. Fitz wants to know why we didn’t get more notice on that name change but we all sing some songs about “Lumen”. Friday always means Bull Yah! In the What Are You Kidding Me stories, a Burger King worker steals $30K by creating fake employees and we learn how Claire is connected, a website is offering $2500 to watch 25 holiday movies in 25 days, a new study indicates the smaller a man’s junk is the more money he makes, there is special new Christmas music just for dogs (so have your dog here when you listen), a 17-year-old takes his Dad’s $3.4 million car for a joy ride and wrecks it, and a woman ticketed for using her cell phone while driving claims she was really eating an ice cream sandwich and has the wrapper and chocolate stains to prove it. On Stream It or Skip It, Drew recommends “The Star Wars Lego Holiday Special”’ on Disney+, “The Princess Switch: Switched Again” on Netflix, and “Animaniacs” and “A Teacher” on Hulu. On the Fitz Files, Florida Georgia Line is not breaking up but they have been to therapy, the “Fresh Prince” reunion included a reconciliation between Will and original Aunt Viv Janet Huber, and Matthew McConaughey is toying with a run for Texas Governor. We need your Insta-Therapy help for a mom who says her son stole a laptop off the neighbor’s porch and she doesn’t know how to return it or punish him without ruining his life. Fitz feels we need a morale boost, so we call General Gridlock. Believe It or Not includes Brittney from Woodinville who fell off a 3-story building and landed without a scratch. The Weekend Party Preview has stuff to do with the family this weekend and a weekend forecast from Nick Allard.

It’s a rare Blue Thursday and we all hope the Seahawks can right the ship tonight. It’s the Great American Smoke Out – can Ryder go all day without a Smoky Treat? In the What Are You Kidding Me stories, a guy leads police on a high-speed chase that includes ditching his car and diving under Lake Shasta in a mini submarine, a new study shows men who have a beard in dating profile pics are 3x more likely to get a match, a new dating term called “Hat Fishing” has men trying to hide their baldness under hats on dating apps, a new phone hotline helps people get through bad psychedelic trips, a Connecticut man is arrested for getting freaky with his neighbor’s tree, and America is having another TP crisis so Ryder and Fitz think we all just need to install bidets. Getting to Know You includes our favorite TV Holiday Specials and the foods we absolutely hated as kids. On the Fitz Files “The Bachelorette” tests the guys on math, spelling, breakfast in bed and carrying around simulated babies, and the “Charlie Brown” Thanksgiving and Christmas Specials will show on PBS after Apple TV angered fans by holding back the Halloween Special. On Make Up or Break Up, Faith from Marysville says after three years together her boyfriend Jake’s family still treats her like a stranger at the holidays, keeping her out of gift exchanges and potluck plans. Whatcha Drinkin’ About? Fitz wants to know what’s stressing us out to the point of drinking. We play Never Have I Ever and learn Ryder has never been to Pike Place Market, Claire has never been fired and Fitz has never cooked a meal from scratch in his whole life. Throwin’ Shade has Shade going after social media apps all having the same features, so why bother having all of them?

A guy leads police on a high-speed chase that includes ditching his car and diving under Lake Shasta in a mini submarine, a new study shows men who have a beard in dating profile pics are 3x more likely to get a match, a new dating term called “Hat Fishing” has men trying to hide their baldness under hats on dating apps, a new phone hotline helps people get through bad psychedelic trips, a Connecticut man is arrested for getting freaky with his neighbor’s tree, and America is having another TP crisis so Ryder and Fitz think we all just need to install bidets.

A teenager in China wanted an iPhone so badly he sold a kidney to get it, a British man is arrested for driving in circles yelling “Wakey Wakey!”, a university Zoom class is interrupted by the professor’s butt-sniffing cats, a UFO is spotted flying over the UAE, Jimmy Dean is offering glass sausage Christmas Ornaments, and two college kids are arrested for stealing the Exits signs from a bunch of dorms.

Drew is worried everyone he owes money to wants it all at once, Claire and Fitz discuss keeping their Mullets into 2021, and Ryder was kept up all night by his friends phone-calling him on Facebook Messenger which he didn’t even know you could do. Ryder says he will not get the Covid vaccine because he’s worried the government is going to chip and track him. In the What Are You Kidding Me stories, a teen in China wanted an iPhone so bad he sold a kidney for it, a British man is arrested for driving in circles yelling “Wakey Wakey!”, a University Zoom class is interrupted by the professor’s butt-sniffing cats, a UFO is spotted flying over the UAE, Jimmy Dean is offering glass sausage Christmas Ornaments, and two college kids are arrested for stealing the Exits signs from a bunch of dorms. In the Fitz Files, The Moderna Covid Vaccine was partially funded by Dolly Parton and Russell Wilson and Ciara now have their own signature fragrance. All Jacked Up includes Miranda from Redmond who eats food well past its expiration date as long as it doesn’t smell bad, and Kristin who says licking her kids’ plates clean after dinner is sometimes the best meal she gets all day. What Friends and Relatives Have You Unfriended Recently and Why? Dylan from Marysville had to unfriend his own Mom over politics, Christian in Snohomish unfriended his older brother because he had blackmail pictures of him as a kid wearing pantyhose, and Ashley from Seattle blocked her whole family for complaining about her bikini pics; Ryder hates “vague-bookers” and he will drop them, and Claire was tired of being in the middle of a couple’s ugly public divorce so she unfriended them both. Fitz licks Nurdles and Drew is appalled. Today’s Troop Salute is Clayton Mutzinger USMC. And we want to hear the Voice You Use to When You Talk To Your Pet!

It’s a Windy One today and Drew says the wind is more nerve-wracking when you live in the middle of the woods. Fitz and Claire are both cooking with Netflix: Fitz loves people who can’t cook on “Nailed It” and Claire loves Fat on “Salt, Fat, Acid, Heat”. Drew wants us all to be in his Pandemic Pod. We get an update on Ryder’s Teeth; is he using his pain to get more attention from his girlfriend? In the What Are You Kidding Me stories, women named Karen say their name is ruining their chances on dating sites, police in Italy use a Lamborghini to deliver a heart to a transplant patient, a home invasion ends when a 16-year-old takes out the robber with a Louisville Slugger, an Alaska Airlines plane hits a bear on a runway while landing, a Florida couple is arrested after pulling over on the highway for a quickie, and the original figures of Santa and Rudolph from the 1964 “Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer” are auctioned for $300K. In the Fitz Files, Taylor Swift’s music masters have been sold again for $300 million to a company called Shamrock Holdings and the British Media wants Prince Harry to quit his association with Netflix because “The Crown” offends the Royal Family. On Make Up or Break Up, Claire from Tacoma is fed up with her boyfriend AJ’s suspicions after she got a butt dial call from her Ex, but AJ says he knows for certain guys sniff around with “oops” calls and wants to know who else is in her phone. Text The Truth has us reading your anonymous confessions, and some of y’all are kinda twisted. Mind Blown has Fitz with amazing details about airport drinking, how time zones affect birthdays, “Toy Story 2”, and just how much bacteria is on the cash in your pocket. And How Would 7-Year-Olds Cook A Turkey? ‘Cuz Fitz’s kids have some great ideas for where turkeys come from and how you should prepare them; or not.

Women named Karen say their name is ruining their chances on dating sites, police in Italy use a Lamborghini to deliver a heart to a transplant patient, a home invasion ends when a 16-year-old takes out the robber with a Louisville Slugger, an Alaska Airlines plane hits a bear on a runway while landing, a Florida couple is arrested after pulling over on the highway for a quickie, and the original figures of Santa and Rudolph from the 1964 “Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer” are auctioned for $300K.

40% of Americans say they are still going to Thanksgiving with 10 or more people in spite of rising Covid numbers, someone tries to remove the Times Square Naked Cowboy’s tighty-whities off of him, a city council meeting in Whatcom County is interrupted by one of the council members’ cows when he Zooms from his barn, a 200-person underground fight club is broken up in New York City, the newly-circulating Secret Sister gift scam is officially classified as a pyramid scheme, and Florida Man is arrested while taking his 8-year-old son on a robbery spree

Can you summarize your entire weekend in three words? Drew tells us what we need to know regarding the new Covid-19 restrictions. In the What Are You Kidding Me stories, 40% of Americans are still going to Thanksgiving with 10 or more people in spite of rising Covid numbers, someone tries to remove the Times Square Naked Cowboy’s tighty-whities, a city council meeting in Whatcom County is interrupted by one of the council members’ cows when he Zooms from his barn, a 200-person underground fight club is broken up in New York City, the newly-circulating Secret Sister gift scam is classified as a pyramid scheme, and Florida Man is arrested while taking his 8-year-old son on a robbery spree. Fitz’ Favorite Things include Fitz loving Foga De Ciao delivery, Drew loving Coastal in Monroe, Claire loving the Mini Space Needle at Rainier U-Haul, and Ryder loving the Frank the Tank Burger at Casey’s in Belfair. In the Fitz Files, Ellen wins the People’s Choice Award for Best Talk Show despite complaints about her toxic work place, the “Fresh Prince” reunion is on HBO Max this Thursday and Carrie Underwood wants to see you sing on your Ring Doorbell video. Disaster Dates includes Vanessa from Arlington who accidentally superglued her lips shut while fixing glue-on nails and Allison who reconnected with an old high school boyfriend who is setting up his own militia. Claire and her wife made the tough decision to not visit family in Oregon for Thanksgiving and instead have their own tiny dinner. The Words of The Year for 2020 include “Lockdown”, “Furlough” and, uhhh… “Muckbang”? Today’s Troop Salute is Stan Lee, yes that Stan Lee, of the US Army. Fitz’ is all-in on the “Unsolved Mysteries” Alien Abduction episode. On Food News, Ryder tells us about a Twinkie for 8 people, Cinnabon Frosting available by the pint, and the new Cheetos Cookbook to go with your Mountain Dew cookbook. Monday Motivation has motivating quotes to get your week started off right.

25% of US women admit they don’t know where their own “equipment” is located or how it all really works, a bride-to-be angry at an online store that her wedding dress is ugly turns out to have it on inside-out, police in Santa Cruz are looking for a stolen Bigfoot statue, the nicest Taco Bell in the world is on a beach in California and we hear a video review, radiologists x-raying a man after a car crash find a phone up his butt, and the new tattoo craze is doing it with black-light ink so you can be Business in the Day and Party in the Night.

With so much snow in the passes, Fitz is excited about sledding and tubing. It’s Friday the 13th and we have a Very Superstitious Bull-Yah! In the What Are You Kidding Me stories, 25% of US women admit they don’t know where their own “equipment” is located or how it really works, a bride-to-be angry that her dress is ugly has it on inside-out, police in Santa Cruz are looking for a stolen Bigfoot statue, the nicest Taco Bell in the world is on the beach in Pacifica, California, radiologists x-raying a man after a car crash find a phone up his butt, and the new tattoo craze is doing it with black-light ink. On Stream It or Skip It, Drew recommends “A Very Country Christmas” and “The Crown: Season 4” on Netflix, “Alex Rider” and “The Dictator” on Amazon Prime, and “The Mandalorian” on Disney+. In the Fitz Files, The Weeknd will play the Superbowl Half-Time show, a popular petition wants Levar Burton to replace Alex Trebek and Chris Stapleton has a parody “Covid Christmas” Album. Is Your Spouse the Best Spouse Ever? Calls us up and Brag on your Honey Bunny, like Lee from Sumner who’s not drinking to join his pregnant wife but she let him have whole bottle of wine, and Ellie whose husband surprised her with a puppy. The Most Important Election of our Time is over the Best Thanksgiving Side Dish - are you for Mashed Potatoes or Stuffing? If you loved Dan+Shay with Justin Bieber on the CMA Awards, then you’ll really love (or hate) Ryder+Claire with Drew. Believe It or Not includes Geri from Bellevue who met all the judges of “American Idol” and Nikki from Renton whose sister peed her pants skydiving and it froze to her body. The Weekend Party Preview includes Nick Allard’s Forecast and Claire tells us about Veterans getting free lifetime access to National Parks, The Woodland Park Zoo’s new lantern festival, and Santa at Bass Pro Shop/Cabelas.

A woman standing in front of the ocean filming a holistic video about its cleansing power gets swallowed by a rogue wave, an Amazon engineer who worked on Alexa builds an app to communicate with your cat, a French elementary school bans parents from throwing their kids over the 6-foot-fence when late for school, and a Russian woman goes viral with video of her man proposing by shoving the ring into a Big Mac.

We all stayed up late watching the CMA Awards last night, except Drew who still has no TV so he is looking forward to our reviews, including our own awards called “The Fitzies –The Awards That Did Not Make the Awards”: like the “Most Likely to Actually Be Slash from Guns and Roses”, “Best Oompa Loompa Outfit”, “Best Use of Pajamas at Work” and “Who Are You and Why Are You Here?” Awards. In the What Are You Kidding Me stories, a woman filming a holistic video about the cleansing power of the ocean gets swallowed by a rogue wave, an Amazon engineer who worked on Alexa builds an app to communicate with your cat, a French elementary school bans parents from throwing their kids over the 6-foot-fence when late for school, and a Russian woman goes viral with video of her man proposing by shoving the ring into a Big Mac. Ryder is involved in a series of Murders; he is producing an audio book from a retired local homicide detective. In The Fitz Files we have a CMA Recap with Eric Church winning Entertainer of the Year, Luke Combs, Morgan Wallen, and Maren Morris all winning big, and an amazing tribute to Charlie Daniels with a scorching fiddle player who never got introduced. On Make Up or Break Up, Kate from Federal Way wants her boyfriend Josh to stop buying old cars thinking he’s going to fix them up because it’s expensive and their lawn looks like a junk yard; Josh says Kate needs to have a little faith in him because this stuff is all future gold. We talk about our “Goosebumps” performances from the CMAs, like Legend Charley Pride actually being nervous when receiving his Lifetime Achievement Award, and performances by Chris Stapleton and Dan + Shay with Justin Bieber. Is Drew going to be arrested for Indecent Exposure for peeing in public? Throwin’ Shade aims his rhymes right at the CMA’s.

Florida Man steals a stole a cop car for a joy ride on a Vision Quest, a man stabbed during an intense Chess match (!) refuses to narc on the stabber, a Boston man protesting an unfixed pot hole plants a Christmas tree in it, a Texas Turkey plant loses thousands of smoked turkeys in a fire, a city councilman who fought to get the Ten Commandments installed outside city hall is arrested for breaking one of the commandments, and you can now get a cookbook containing only recipes using Mountain Dew.

Thank You, Veterans, for all you do! Drew tells us about the day he signed up for the US Marine Corps, and what happened on 9-11, and Fitz’s kids Cash and Drew sing a special song for Veterans. It’s CMA Day and Dan+Shay, Maren Morris, Russell Dickerson and Jon Pardi all call in to talk about their nominations, what performances they are looking forward to, and are there really “Covid Bubbles” at the tables? In the What Are You Kidding Me stories, Florida Man steals a stole a cop car for a joy ride on a Vision Quest, a man stabbed during an intense Chess match refuses to narc on the stabber, a man protesting an unfixed pot hole plants a Christmas tree in it, a Texas Turkey plant loses thousands of smoked turkeys in a fire, a city councilman who fought to get the Ten Commandments installed outside city hall is arrested for breaking one of them, and now you can get a cookbook containing only recipes using Mountain Dew. Drew loves everything about Christmas except Nativity Scenes and Fitz is determined to give him one. In the Fitz Files, new “Bachelorette” Tayshia is shocked when one guy leaves because he’s still in love with Clare, Dale and Clare insist they didn’t hook up before the show ever started, and we have a CMA Preview including the Charlie Daniels tribute. All Jacked Up includes Seth from Woodinville who walks backwards so nobody can sneak up on him and Amanda from Poulsbo who loves the smell of her boyfriend’s armpit funk so much she asked him to stop wearing deodorant. Today’s Troop Salute is about all about Veterans Day.

A human heart on the way to a transplant operation survives two mishaps including a helicopter crash and being drop-kicked, teenage girls at a drive-thru zoo freak out when a cow sticks it’s head in the window, Arby’s now has a turkey-shaped pillow you can wear on your head to nap in any position, a guy sends a hotter and more successful guy to his high school reunion as a stand-in, a woman named Corona says she’s getting harassed a lot, and a California man has spent quarantine creating a scaled-down model of Disney’s Matterhorn for his kids to ride

Fitz is still working on Ryder’s “Heartbeat of Auburn” Billboard but swears it will happen. Claire thinks her Mullet has made her smarter because there’s less hair covering her brain. Jimmie Allen and Carly Pearce both call the show today to talk about the CMA Awards. In the What Are You Kidding Me stories, a human heart packed for transplant survives two mishaps including a helicopter crash, teenage girls at a drive-thru zoo freak out when a cow sticks it’s head in the window, Arby’s has a turkey-shaped pillow to wear on your head to nap in any position, a guy sends a hotter more successful person to his high school reunion as a stand in, a woman named Corona says she’s getting harassed a lot, and a California man has spent quarantine creating a scaled down model of Disney’s Matterhorn for his kids to ride. In the Fitz Files, FGL is out of the CMA’s because Tyler is Covid-positive, Jeopardy’s producer pays tribute to Alex Trebek before airing the first of the final episodes Alex had already filmed, and the TikTok skateboarding cranberry juice guy just bought his girlfriend a $22,000 engagement ring. On Make Up or Break Up, Ed from North Bend says his girlfriend Kelly is overspending for Christmas and he’s worried about money, but Kelly says she has a spending and payoff-plan and wants everyone to have a nice Christmas in this crappy year. Text The Truth has you telling us your deepest, darkest confessions so we can read them out loud anonymously for you. Today on Mind Blown we realize that our phones are now Pocket Watches, only two words in English end with “-gry” (Angry and Hungry) and Will Smith’s full first name is actually Willard.

Most Americans polled in a recent survey say their couch has been their best friend during the pandemic, a guy is arrested for using the products while still inside an adult store, a Rhode Island group is building “Hobbit Houses” to rent, you can now visit the actual Titanic wreckage on the bottom of the Atlantic for just $125K per person, when you see Santa to Cabella/Bass Pro this year he will be behind a magic shield, and Florida Man goes nuts when his Checker’s Burger runs out of lettuce.

Claire is now sporting Mullet along with Fitz, and the pressure is on Drew to be next. Listen for your chance to win a Nintendo Switch every hour! In the What Are You Kidding Me stories, most Americans say their couch is their best friend during the pandemic, a guy is arrested for using the products inside an adult store, a Rhode Island group builds “Hobbit Houses” to rent, you can now visit the Titanic wreckage on the bottom of the Atlantic for $125K per person, when Santa comes to Cabella/Bass Pro he will have a magic shield, and Florida Man goes nuts when his Checker’s Burger runs out of lettuce. Ryder’s is headed for the Dental Surgeon’s office to get a brand new smile. Wal-Mart is having three official Black Fridays to avoid crowding. In the Fitz Files, Alex Trebek passes away of Pancreatic Cancer although he filmed Jeopardy episodes up until 10 days ago, Lee Brice is out of the CMA’s after a positive Covid-19 Test, and Lil Nas X has a Christmas Song with Michael J Fox in the video. Today’s Disaster Date comes from Barry All-Day-Every-Day who had a date with a woman who was apparently married and the husband came home during the date. What Targeted Social Media Ads are you getting? ‘Cuz Fitz is getting man caves, log cabins, and galaxy lamps, Ryder is getting gaming chairs, Claire gets invites to marathons and races, and Drew gets cabinet hardware. Drew is hearing the Call of the Wild at his hew house in Monroe which is apparently surrounded by a pack of coyotes.Today’s Troop Salute is for the 245th Birthday of the US Marine Corps. Do you have a Cranky Coworker? Every work place has one and we decide who ours is. Ryder’s Food News includes Starbucks cancelling the Gingerbread Latte, but adding the Hot Cinnamon Roll Frappuccino Latte, and Costco has a “12 Chocolates of Christmas Calendar” with edible ornaments! Monday Motivation has motivating quotes to get your week started off right!

Drew is giddy over some new Costco Flannel and Fitz and Claire are giddy over Dale on “The Bachelorette”. It’s Friday, so let’s Bull-Yah! In the What Are You Kidding Me stories, a woman is arrested after stashing a handgun in the bushes outside Disney World and blaming it on her 6-year-old, Florida Man pulls a gun on another driver who insults his manhood based on his truck, a guy who sued Canada Dry for deceptive practices about the health benefits of their Ginger Ale gets $200K, “Election Disorder” is recognized as an actual stress condition by doctors, a new 2020 candle smells like a combo of things like Joe Exotic, and guy a wearing a t-shirt saying “BBQ, Beer and Freedom” crashes a Nevada Election briefing. On Stream It or Skip It Drew recommends “Dawson’s Creek” on Netflix, “Inside-Out” on Disney+, and “Reno 911” on HBO Max. In the Fitz Files, it’s a “Bachelorette” Blow-Out as Dale proposes to Clare, the rest of the guys demand an apology, and we met the new Bachelorette. An Anonymous P1 needs your help with Insta-Therapy because he doesn’t know how to tell his wife that she is going bald. Fitz is passing the Mullet Torch to Claire, who is getting one tomorrow, but Drew refuses to be the next in line and Ryder proves to us he’s got nothing to mullet with. Believe It or Not includes Tyler from Mill Creek who should probably be in jail, Stephanie from Federal Way who was kissed on the head by Oprah as a baby, and Nina from Mill Creek who had a family murder solved by “Unsolved Mysteries”. Drew has noticed a huge increase in scams on Facebook Marketplace as he is trying to outfit his new home. Claire is tired of being watched by dog-poop-fearing neighbors as she walks her dogs. In the Weekend Party Preview, the Auburn Veteran’s Parade is happening as a Vehicle parade and the Bass Pro / Cabela Winter Wonderland is opening Saturday with a Santa Parade.

A woman is arrested outside Disney World after stashing a handgun in the bushes and blaming it on her 6-year-old, Florida Man pulls a gun on another driver who insults his manhood based on the size of his truck, a guy who sued Canada Dry for deceptive practices about the health benefits of their Ginger Ale gets $200K, “Election Disorder” is recognized as an actual stress condition by doctors, a new 2020 candle smells like a bunch of weird things including Joe Exotic, and a guy wearing a t-shirt saying “BBQ, Beer and Freedom” crashes a Nevada Election briefing.

Scientists in Thailand have solved the problem of stinky feet with a zinc-oxide nano-solution for your socks, we nearly had Caitlyn Jenner running as Kanye’s VP, Colonel Sanders is shaving his moustache and goatee for “Movember”, a 5-year old breaks the Guinness World Record for recognizing cartoon characters in a minute, a distillery in New Hampshire has a new deer-flavored whiskey, and an Oregon man robs a store but gets caught because he has a couch strapped to the top of his getaway car.

Drew likes living on the edge so today he drove all the way in from Monroe to Bull-vue on a flat tire; one day last week he drove in on fumes after his girlfriend left him with no gas. In the What Are You Kidding Me Stories, scientists in Thailand have solved the problem of stinky feet with a zinc-oxide nano-solution, we nearly had Caitlyn Jenner running as Kanye’s VP, Colonel Sanders is shaving for “Movember”, a 5-year old breaks the Guinness World Record for recognizing cartoon characters in a minute, a distillery in New Hampshire has a new deer-flavored whiskey, and an Oregon man robs a store but gets caught because he has a couch strapped to the top of his car. Drew is cultivating a Bromance with his new neighbor who has a big garage full of tools and a tractor. If you want to impress people Fitz has a list of words that will enhance your eloquence. In the Fitz Files, an old woman is Catfished by someone claiming to be Jason Momoa, Michael J Fox says he’s done acting because Parkinson’s has affected his short-term memory, Jeff Lowe from “Tiger King” is getting into porn films, and Justin Bieber will be performing with Dan+Shay at the CMA’s. On Make Up or Break Up, Tony from Lacey is pissed off that his fiancée Whitney sold her engagement ring to pay bills, but Whitney says she has to pawn it to make rent and will absolutely get it back. The Election result everyone is watching is in Rabbit Hash, Kentucky, where Wilbur the French Bulldog is nosing out Jackrabbit the Beagle. What are some questions you should never ever ask someone else? And Throwin’ Shade could generate some controversy, cuz he’s going after Baby Yoda!

“Baby Shark” is now officially the most watched video in YouTube history with over 7 billion views, two guys are kicked off an American Airlines flight when one of them tries to hide under the other’s first class seat for a YouTube stunt, a man shoots someone who called his baby ugly, two kayakers are nearly swallowed alive by a humpback whale and get it all on video, a guy caught with heroin hidden in his butt cheeks and digital scales says it’s all for personal use, and a study finds the average American asks for advice 6000 times in their life from 31 people.

It’s chilly and rainy but Fitz, Drew and Claire can’t agree whether it’s just another typical lovely crisp Northwest Fall morning or it’s miserable and gross. In the What Are You Kidding Me stories, “Baby Shark” is officially the most watched video in YouTube history, two guys are kicked off a flight when one of them tries to hide under the other’s first class seat for a YouTube stunt, a man shoots someone who called his baby ugly, two kayakers are nearly swallowed by a humpback whale and get it all on video, a guy caught with heroin hidden in his butt cheeks and digital scales says it’s all for personal use, and a study finds the average American asks for advice 6000 times in their life. Are you up on the latest Dating Terms, like “Covid-Worthy” and “Antibody-Boy”? And – what animal do you want in your Profile Picture to maximize your Swipes? In the Fitz Files Gabby Barret might give birth on stage at the CMA’s when she does her hit duet with Charlie Puth who she has never actually met, Jimmie Allen defends Noah Cyrus’ CMT Music Awards Outfit by comparing her to Prince and the Beatles, and Kanye voted for Kanye but Kim didn’t. All Jacked Up includes Briana who cannot have her food touching on her plate, Justin from Olympia who has been wearing the same socks since middle school and Alisha who is a nurse but is freaked out by cotton balls. Today’s Troop Salute is Kenny Thomas of the US Army. Ryder refuses to show Fitz the search history on his phone and Fitz tells us what people are searching for most in each state, around here it’s Bigfoot. Tell us the nickname you had as a kid and we’ll try to guess how you got it, like Ashley from Bothell aka “Snake Hips”, and Danny from Mill Creek aka “Kit Kat””. And should we screen our loved ones for symptoms and temperatures before allowing them to enter our homes for Thanksgiving?

Relax – we are here to be your Bubble of Calm in a World of Turmoil! Can you tell “Fact or Bull Crap” about US Presidents, like did Calvin Coolidge really like to have petroleum jelly rubbed on his head during breakfast? In the What Are You Kidding Me stories: a cop makes a DUI stop dressed as a Storm Trooper, a man who posts details about his girlfriend’s operation gets his house robbed while at the hospital, a town in Kentucky has only animals running for mayor, a new App lets you enter into a legally binding contract before sexting, a newly-married woman is suing her husband for fraud after it turns out he’s bald, and a crook who should have gotten away with high speed chase on Halloween when cops stopped chasing him gets caught after falling asleep in a McDonald’s. Jameson Rodgers calls in to talk about his new #1 song “Some Girls” and how he came to music very late in life. In the Fitz Files, Jeannie Mai leaves “DWTS” due to illness, Britney Spears is trying to reassure fans she’s OK but we’re still not sure, Russell Wilson spends over $1 million a year to keep his body in shape, and Jon Pardi dished out marital advice. On Make Up or Break Up, Erin from Kent is mad her boyfriend Keith wants her to cook for 20 friends for Thanksgiving instead of going to see her family. Text The Truth has us anonymously spilling your most salacious secrets for you. If you are getting ready for Christmas shopping, Claire has a list of items already flying off the shelves like fitness equipment, puzzles and games, and craft supplies. Ryder is having bad dreams so Fitz wants him to look into the new trend of Dream Tourism. “Mind Blown”: Fitz has a bunch of surprising facts that will blow your mind! Drew’s girlfriend’s parents are doing a lot of cool work around his property but everyone on the show thinks Drew doesn’t realize they are just fixing it up so they can move in.

A Highway Patrol Officer makes a DUI stop dressed as a Storm Trooper, a man who posts details about giving his girlfriend a kidney gets his house robbed while they are at the hospital, a little town in Kentucky only ever has animals running for mayor, a new App lets you enter into a legally binding contract before sexting, a newly-married woman is suing her husband for fraud after it turns out he’s bald, and a crook who should have gotten away with a high speed chase on Halloween when cops stopped chasing him gets caught after falling asleep in a McDonald’s.

A skunk leads to the evacuation of a Walmart, a woman passing out “Get Out the Vote” flyers steals someone’s cat off their porch, more than half of people polled say Election Day will be the most stressful day of their lives, a doctor in India is conned into buying Aladdin’s Lamp from a guy dressed as Genie, 1 in 3 people admit to lying about the number of their previous “laundry” partners to their spouse, and a woman climbs a tree for some day drinking and refuses to come down when a guy in a bucket lift comes for her.

Fitz gave his kids a super fun Halloween although it didn’t go quite as planned when his daughter’s costume inflator fell apart and then she fell apart. Claire set up a nice Halloween display but was the only house on the street that did, so no kids even came down her street. Claire went for a Covid Test and was surprised it was so efficient for a County operation. In the What Are You Kidding Me stories, a skunk evacuates a Walmart, a woman passing out Voting flyers steals someone’s cat off their porch, more than half of people polled say Election Day will be the most stressful day of their lives, a doctor in India is conned into buying Aladdin’s Lamp from a guy dressed as Genie, 1 in 3 people admit to lying about the number of their previous “laundry” partners to their spouse, and a woman climbs a tree for some day drinking and refuses to come down when a bucket lift comes for her. Ryder and his family are fighting over politics with one of them even unfriending him on social media. Fitz did the “We Ate All Your Halloween Candy” gag on his kids. In the Fitz Files, Lori Loughlin will be spending Christmas in jail, Taylor Swift officially gets to re-record her own music, and the “real” James Bond, Sean Connery, has died. Today on Dating Disasters we hear from Amanda in Kirkland who thought her Bumble date stood her up so she got drunk with the bartender but later found out the date saw her and left. Today’s Troop Salute is Jacob Saldana of the US Navy. Ryder got everyone apple fritters this morning except Fitz, who says Ryder needs to “Recognize!” Food News has Ryder with the latest info on munchies including the triumphant return of the McRib and Stouffer’s new Lasagna Fanny Pack. Monday Motivation has motivating quotes to get your week started off right!

An iPhone repairman exposes a cheating husband who tried to bribe him to hide the cheating from his wife, a man asks his friend to hide drugs in his butt crack during a traffic stop, a woman nearly dies from a thong-induced butt abscess (!), a woman in labor insists on voting first, a guy on meth climbs to the top of his apartment building and throws money, and a man is super proud of his Halloween display that’s so gory the police keep being called to his home.

It’s Halloween Inside and Outside! Brace yourself for a Spooky Bull-Yah! “Who’s Popping Out of the Coffin” has Ryder back at Van Ghoul’s Cemetery digging up dead celebrities. Fitz does an amazing Country version of “Thriller”. In the What Are You Kidding Me stories, an iPhone repairman exposes a cheating husband who tried to bribe him to hide the cheating from his wife, a man asks his friend to hide drugs in his butt crack during a traffic stop, a woman nearly dies from a thong-induced butt abscess, a woman in labor insists on voting first, a guy on meth climbs to the top of his apartment building and throws money, and a man is super proud of his Halloween display that’s so gory the police keep being called. On Stream It or Skip It Drew recommends the New Season of “The Mandalorian” on Disney+, “Addams Family” on Netflix, “IT” and “IT 2” on HBO Max, and the “Rocky Horror Picture Show” on Hulu. Ryder’s Scary Movie Ultimate Pick is the original “Halloween.” In the Fitz Files, Kanye West gives Kim a hologram of her dead father wishing her a Happy Birthday, Leanne Rimes poses nude to address Psoriasis, Scarlett Johansen and Colin Jost are married, and the CMA’s will be a live show. The P1’s Have Talent Halloween Edition includes Rebecca from Graham who sounds like a really scary demon and Gavin from SeaTac who talks to us like a wise-but-scary old tree in the forest. Believe it Or Not includes Ryan from Monroe whose girlfriend lost her toe in a terrible toaster accident and Vicki from Bremerton whose husband had an eagle steal a fish right off his line. King County wins the month of October on County Wars! We award Truckers Tuition Round Two to Katherine, an Army wife who will use the CDL to have a job and career wherever the military takes her and her husband. And we wrap up $1 Million Dollars of Jobs with an astounding total of $2,222,360 worth of jobs!

Fitz is afraid to stand up because he forgot to wear a belt. Drew ate yogurt 12 days past its date and Claire and Ryder are on edge being near him. In the What Are You Kidding Me stories, a woman is under fire from her HOA for her Halloween Pole Dancing Skeletons, a theater is raising money by auctioning off the rights to haunt the theater after you die, a dad breaks the world record for the fastest mile pushing a baby in a stroller, a drive-through farm has a zebra that screams like Marty from “Madagascar”, police tell a man being nude in his own backyard he’s indecent with little kids next door, and a man falls into a sink hole full of so many rats he is afraid to open his mouth to scream. We have more disturbing Halloween Mind Blowing Facts. Fitz is loving life with a Mullet and wants Claire to get one. In the Fitz Files, Brad Pitt breaks up with his girlfriend and may be winning his custody trial, a “Bachelorette” producer says he knew the moment he had to kick Clare off the show, Blake gives Gwen a $500,000 ring, and Kelly Clarkson has a new Christmas Song. On Make Up or Break Up, Marcus from Edmonds is not cool with his girlfriend Kaylie selling her dirty socks online to weirdos but she says it’s how she’s making their car payments. Ryder is back at Van Ghouls Cemetery digging up celebrities for us to guess. Garth Brooks and Trisha Yearwood Zoom in to talk about their new single “Shallow” and when they think they’ll get back to touring. Throwin’ Shade has Shade going after kids, including his own, who are driving parents crazy stuck at home.

A woman is under fire from her HOA for her Halloween Pole Dancing Skeletons, a theater is raising money by auctioning off the rights to haunt the theater after you die, a dad breaks the world record for the fastest mile while pushing a baby in a stroller, a drive-through farm has a zebra that screams just like Marty the Zebra from “Madagascar”, police tell a man swimming nude in his own backyard that he’s indecent because there are little kids next door, and a man falls into a sink hole full of so many rats he is afraid to open his mouth to scream.

A man protesting a store carrying only “essential items” that deems clothing unessential comes in wearing nothing but a thong, the newest stupid TikTok trend is super-gluing your Halloween vampire teeth in, get ready for Fitz to play the next “Baby Shark” called “The Flip Flap Song”, Play-Doh has new adult-themed scents like “spa day”, and “latte”, scientists are working on a pill cocktail to prevent snoring, and police discover the skull of a missing a man has been some guy’s mantle decoration for many years.

Mama Fitz has written a new song about our Beloved Seahawks! In the What Are You Kidding stories, a man protesting a store carrying only “essential items” comes in wearing nothing but a thong, the new stupid TikTok trend is super-gluing your vampire teeth in, get ready for Fitz to play the next “Baby Shark” called “The Flip Flap Song”, Play-Doh has new adult-themed scents like “spa day”, and “latte”, a pill-cocktail to prevent snoring is in the works, and police discover the skull of a missing a man has been some guy’s mantle decoration for many years. In the Good Stuff we meet Bickford Ford Community Hero Rachel from Port Orchard, an avid quilter who has used her time off work to make 13,000 free masks. In the Fitz Files, Blake and Gwen are engaged, and a bunch of the guys on “The Bachelorette” are ready to walk off the show because Clare is not treating them fairly. All Jacked Up includes Claire refusing to eat sourdough because starter is 100 years old, Ethan in Redmond who has to eat his food in alphabetical order, and Pete from Gig Harbor who can’t sleep unless his pillow is ice cold so when he’s travelling he puts his hotel pillow in the ice machine. “Who is Poppin’ out of the Coffin” has Ryder back out at Van Ghoul’s Cemetery digging up celebrities. Today’s Troop Salute is Joah Cash who is entering the US Navy Academy. Prepare for Scariest Moment in Radio History as we tell creepy stories and YOU provide the scary sound effects! Details have emerged on the Murder Hornet Heroes.

A guy in a ritzy Southern California neighborhood is blasting the “Gilligan’s Island” theme in a war with his neighbor who installed a sculpture that blocked his view, a man covers himself with 140lbs of bees to break a World Record, two robbers are caught in a restaurant after one passes out drunk eating cheese cake, Florida Man steals a backhoe to dig up Biden signs, a guy prank calls his mom saying he’s from jail but she just says “Call Your Daddy”, and a Hayride turns tragic when the wagon overturns.

We Salute the Heroes who captured the Blaine Murder Hornets! In the What Are You Kidding Me stories, a guy in a ritzy SoCal neighborhood blasts the “Gilligan’s Island” theme as warfare against his neighbor who installed a sculpture that blocked his view, a man covers himself with 140lbs of bees to break a World Record, two robbers are caught in a restaurant after one passes out drunk eating cheese cake, Florida Man steals a backhoe to dig up Biden signs, a guy prank calls his mom saying he’s from jail but she just says “Call Your Daddy” and a Hayride turns tragic when the wagon overturns. A story last week about a Tennessee Football Fan reminded Fitz of an Epic Jimmy Dean Sausage Consumer Line Call in which a man complains about a smaller sausage package by talking about his fat family. Ryder and Shade failed the office Fire Drill on Monday when they were caught out smoking at the wrong meeting place. In the Fitz Files, AJ McLean’s dancing partner slams her head into the floor on “Dancing with the Stars”, Clare Crawley hints she was forced off “The Bachelorette”, DK Metcalf is invited to the Olympic Track and Field Time Trials and Simon Cowell has a $100,000 set of teeth. On Make Up or Break Up, Renee from Renton is excited to go trick or treating with her son but her fiancée Jonathan if afraid they will come home with COVID. Text the Truth has your anonymous confession texts, like a women who is thrilled her cheating ex-husband is now cheating on the woman he left her for, and someone confesses to being a professional dominatrix and says only two people know besides us now. What Does Death Taste Like? Fitz has some amazingly creepy details about things you thought you knew! Drew is (mostly) enjoying the wildlife around his new place in Monroe but some of the identified noises are scaring him.

A minister surprises a bride and groom by breaking into (bad) song during their vows, a man declares the scariest Halloween yard decoration he could find is a simply a sign saying “2020”, a guy is arrested for calling 911 to report tiny little flying aliens, two men are arrested for doing a home-version sex change operation on a volunteer, a TikTok trend dares you to say “Coca Cola” without your lips touching (which wouldn’t happen anyway), and cops bust a 600-person foot fetish party for violating covid-19 protocols.