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Hour 1 of The Drive gets you ready for another big football weekend in Central Illinois. Carson Gourdie joins the show to break down Bret Bielema's latest press conference ahead of Illinois' season opener against UAB and discuss what we're learning about the 2026 Fighting Illini. Carson also previews Week 2 of the high school football season, including the biggest storylines and matchups to watch around Central Illinois. Illini wrestling great Zac Braunagel calls in to talk about RAF Wrestling's trip to Moscow, his co-main event on the card, and more. Plus, it's time for another Random Illini Player of the Day, featuring another memorable name from Illinois football history. Listen to the full first hour of The Drive for Illini football, Central Illinois high school football, wrestling and plenty more.
How to Improve EVERY Aspect of Your Life: An Interview with J.R. Briggs (Episode 297) Proverbs 11:24 (MSG) The world of the generous gets larger and larger; the world of the stingy gets smaller and smaller. *Transcription Below* J.R. Briggs (DMin) possesses four passions: following Jesus, equipping and investing in hungry kingdom leaders, growing fruit on other people's trees, and creating good kingdom mischief. In short, his calling is to partner with people who are called to follow Jesus while they lead others. In 2011 he started Kairos Partnerships, an organization committed to help leaders overcome their unique leadership challenges through leadership coaching, consulting, speaking, and writing. For more than 15 years, J.R. served in pastoral roles in mega-churches, church plants and house church networks. Since starting Kairos Partnerships, he has served and invested in ministry leaders in over 40 denominations throughout North America. In addition to ministry leaders, he has invested in a wide variety of leaders, including business owners, college presidents, military leaders, Division 1 basketball coaches, and non-profit directors. He serves as a guest instructor in the Master of Arts in Spiritual Formation program at Friends University and the Master of Arts in Leadership program at Taylor University. He has lectured, taught and spoken at over a dozen colleges, universities, and seminaries around the U.S. He also serves as the Director of Leadership & Congregational Formation for The Ecclesia Network and as a National Trainer & Strategist for Fresh Expressions U.S. In addition to writing several books on a wide variety of topics, he has also published articles in Christianity Today, Huffington Post, Preaching Today, American Bible Society, N.T. Wright Online, Missio Alliance, and Relevant Magazine. He hosts the Resilient Leaders podcast. J.R. and his wife Megan have two sons and live in the greater Philadelphia area. J.R.'s Website J.R.'s Book Thank You to Our Sponsor: Leman Property Management Questions and Topics We Cover: Can you contrast Jesus' teaching with field trips to the way we structure a typical Sunday morning in America? Will you also share how you arrived at asking yourself two questions that have opened numerous doors for you? Once we put this into practice for ourselves, how can we begin to cultivate it in our children as well? Other Savvy Sauce Episode Mentioned: 219. Training Our Children in Biblical Financial Stewardship with Matt Bell Connect with The Savvy Sauce on Facebook or Instagram or Our Website Gospel Scripture: (all NIV) Romans 3:23 “for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God,” Romans 3:24 “and are justified freely by his grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus.” Romans 3:25 (a) “God presented him as a sacrifice of atonement, through faith in his blood.” Hebrews 9:22 (b) “without the shedding of blood there is no forgiveness.” Romans 5:8 “But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” Romans 5:11 “Not only is this so, but we also rejoice in God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have now received reconciliation.” John 3:16 “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.” Romans 10:9 “That if you confess with your mouth, “Jesus is Lord,” and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved.” Luke 15:10 says “In the same way, I tell you, there is rejoicing in the presence of the angels of God over one sinner who repents.” Romans 8:1 “Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus” Ephesians 1:13–14 “And you also were included in Christ when you heard the word of truth, the gospel of your salvation. Having believed, you were marked in him with a seal, the promised Holy Spirit, who is a deposit guaranteeing our inheritance until the redemption of those who are God's possession- to the praise of his glory.” Ephesians 1:15–23 “For this reason, ever since I heard about your faith in the Lord Jesus and your love for all the saints, I have not stopped giving thanks for you, remembering you in my prayers. I keep asking that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the glorious Father, may give you the spirit of wisdom and revelation, so that you may know him better. I pray also that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you, the riches of his glorious inheritance in the saints, and his incomparably great power for us who believe. That power is like the working of his mighty strength, which he exerted in Christ when he raised him from the dead and seated him at his right hand in the heavenly realms, far above all rule and authority, power and dominion, and every title that can be given, not only in the present age but also in the one to come. And God placed all things under his feet and appointed him to be head over everything for the church, which is his body, the fullness of him who fills everything in every way.” Ephesians 2:8–10 “For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith – and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God – not by works, so that no one can boast. For we are God‘s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.“ Ephesians 2:13 “But now in Christ Jesus you who once were far away have been brought near through the blood of Christ.“ Philippians 1:6 “being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.” *Transcription* Music: (0:00 – 0:09) Laura Dugger: (0:12 - 1:44) Welcome to The Savvy Sauce, where we have practical chats for intentional living. I'm your host, Laura Dugger, and I'm so glad you're here. Leman Property Management Company has the apartment you will be able to call home, with over 1,700 apartment units available in Central Illinois. Visit them today at lemanproperties.com or connect with them on Facebook. J.R. Briggs is one of the most intriguing humans I've encountered, and it's hard to sum up his bio, as he's had so many experiences in his past through various pastoral roles, and then he became the founder of Kairos Partnerships, where he invests in leaders. He's also a podcast host, in addition to his work as an author. His most recent book is The Art of Asking Better Questions, and it's summed up in the intro, where he writes, "I have a bone-deep conviction that all of us need to ask more questions and better questions. Doing so can change your life and the lives of those around you." So now we get to actually learn how to make this happen with my guest, Reverend Dr. J.R. Briggs. Welcome to The Savvy Sauce, J.R. J.R. Briggs: (1:44 - 1:45) Thanks for having me. I'm looking forward to this, Laura. Laura Dugger: (1:46 - 2:00) Well, I'd love to go back and first hear a little bit more of your origin story. So, do you attribute your love of questions and your skill for asking great questions more to nature or nurture? J.R. Briggs: (2:01 - 5:04) That's a fantastic question. No one has ever asked me that, Laura. So, right off the bat, well done. I love good questions like this. I think it's a little bit of both, and I'm not just wimping out on that answer. Here's what I mean. I grew up in a wonderful home, still great friends with both my parents, and my parents, especially my dad, they were great question askers, and I saw them model this really well in the home. And I think in previous generations, it was, you know, kids are to be seen but not heard. That was not how my parents operated. They very much said, "You know what, we want to know what you think." And so, dinner times were great. Even hearing the way, especially my father would ask questions of people in the lobby at church or our neighbors, or we'd be at some party, and the way he would ask questions, I would just listen and say, "Wow, this is fascinating, the kind of conversations that are happening because of this." So, modeled really well, but also observed a lot, and more is caught than taught. And I observed my parents doing this really well. And I thought, these are really fun conversations to just eavesdrop in on as a kid. And then also, I began to notice that there were people that were really fun and lived inspiring lives, and they asked great questions. And I noticed the people that had, that lived really small, uninspiring lives, I realized they weren't asking very many questions. And I began to say, "Well, which kind of person do I want to be? I kind of want to be in the first group. Well, what's the difference? These people are asking questions, regular questions, quality questions." And I thought, "Ooh, I need to pay attention to this and actually lean in to do this more." So, I often learned how to do it too. So, there was the nature piece, the nurture piece, or the nurture, the nature piece there, the nurture piece, I did study. I'm kind of a nerd. And so, I would watch people who ask great questions and say, "Why was that a good question? What did they do? Why did they ask it that way? How did they know to ask that question as opposed to something else?" And so that was really helpful. But then I began to notice as I read my Bible, I got a red-letter edition of my Bible and began to notice how many red question marks there were. And I began to take a pen and circle all of the red questions, question marks that Jesus asked. And I thought, "Wow, the way the truth and the life, who had all the answers, yet he asked a ton of questions." So that sent me on a deep dive that eventually I studied. And my doctorate, my dissertation for my doctorate was on learning to equip leaders to ask better questions in the way of Jesus. And so, using him as that model. So, there's a very long answer, Laura, to a very short question, is it nature or nurture? I really believe it's both. And I hope I can continue to learn in my own life until my last breath to how to be a better question asker, because it's that powerful. Laura Dugger: (5:04 - 5:57) Mm-hmm. I agree with that. And I love the humility in that response. Also, as you share it, it reminds me of a scripture from Proverbs 11:24, the Message version, which I believe previous guest Matt Bell had shared this as it relates to finances. But J.R., I hear it through your lifestyle of generosity with questions. And the verse says, "The world of the generous gets larger and larger. The world of the stingy gets smaller and smaller." So, I love how you illustrated that. But you're also the first person that I heard articulate this beauty of asking questions for connection rather than just for information. So, can you explain more of why questions are such a generous gift and an offering of hospitality? J.R. Briggs: (5:58 - 8:36) Mm-hmm. Yeah. Well, one of the things that really hit me, I touched on this earlier, that Jesus is the way, the truth, and the life, the second member of the Trinity, who knows everything. Why would he ask so many questions? Well, he also said, "I only do what I see my Father doing." What did he see his Father doing? If you look in the Old Testament, God asks a ton of questions too. So, I said, "Wait a second. Okay. The all-knowing, all-powerful God of the universe, why does God ask so many questions when he already knows the answer?" And that drove me to say, maybe it wasn't just for information. And I began to think about Adam and Eve in the garden and say, when he says, "Where are you?" It wasn't because God didn't know. And it wasn't a geographical question as much as I think it's a relational and theological question that he wants Adam and Eve to answer. And so, as a result of that, I said, "Why then would God do that?" Well, God already knows, but he desires connection with us. And then I thought, "Ooh, yeah, that isn't just God to us. There are times where I ask questions of my kids when they were younger, or of other little kids at church, where I know the answer already, but I'm asking it as a way of building trust and shared story and connection with them." And I thought, yeah, there's real connection when it comes to questions. And when we do that, when we offer our full selves, the French philosopher, Simone Weil, she said, "Attention is the rarest and purest form of generosity." And as a result of that, that's the hospitality piece. And I think, let's not forget that the word hospital is in the word hospitality, that our questions and our attention can actually be a form of healing that we offer to other people. When we think of hospitality, we often think of, I don't know, making a fresh pie or laying out doilies and sweeping the house before someone comes over. That can be part of it. But the real definition of hospitality is making new people feel comfortable in new situations. And so, what do good questions do? They help people who might feel new or an outsider feel like they're an insider. And I believe that's one of the beautiful benefits of questions where people say, "Man, thank you. No one has ever asked me that." Or "I feel seen. Wow, you really want to care. You care enough to know what I'm thinking." That is an unbelievable gift that we can give to others as a form of hospitality. Laura Dugger: (8:36 - 8:55) And I think that illuminates what you even say up front in your book, that you do believe that these questions can change our life and the lives of those around us, and especially through this powerful book that you've written. So, can you elaborate on that claim? J.R. Briggs: (8:56 - 10:33) Yeah, the dimensions of your life expand or contract depending upon the questions that you ask. So, when we refrain from asking good questions, our world gets smaller. And when we start to ask better questions, and more frequently, our worlds begin to expand. And so, what I tell people is we don't have a shortage of information. We have a shortage of wisdom and curiosity and wonder. And so, what we need to kindle in that is that desire for and that ability to ask the right questions at the right time for the right reason to the right people. And if we want more information, we should just Google it. But if what we're after is wisdom and connection and engagement, we need questions. And questions are, I think we all would admit, Laura, questions are important. I don't think that we would realize just how powerful they actually are. And so, the goal of the book was to unleash and wake up the sleeping giants that exist and say, this can be used for good. There's so many, again, we don't have a shortage of information. But asking good questions is a lost art. And the goal is to try to help people realize its power, that it's more accessible. They're free. They can be used at any time. They don't have a shelf life. But we just need to cultivate the desire for it and then have some skills to lean in, because it really can be such an unbelievable gift. The questions that we ask often reveal the values that we hold. And so that's another way that we can press into that as well. Laura Dugger: (10:34 - 10:49) Okay, so let's say that the desire is there. Maybe for all of us, probably the skill is a little lacking. How can we begin to get a little bit better at this or just get started with asking better questions today? J.R. Briggs: (10:49 - 14:18) Yeah, well, we got to start, Laura, by admitting that there are a lot of obstacles that exist that our culture puts in front of us to make it hard to do that. One is we're in an attention-seeking age, right? I mean, the joke says enough about me, what do you think about me? And so, because we live in the social media, look at me, look at me reality that we're in, it's really hard because questions are the opposite. I'm putting the spotlight on you rather than on my own life. But we also are in a culture of great efficiency, and so questions feel inefficient. They feel really inefficient, like it slows things down. How many of us have been in a meeting and we're about to get up and someone says, "Any questions?" And someone, "Oh," and we just say, "No, no, no, we were just about to leave, you're slowing us down." And so that in the business world and in sales, that's the number one thing is questions. We got stuff to do and things to sell. But if we can just slow down, it's better. But those are some of the obstacles that exist. So, if we're assuming we have curiosity, we have wisdom, we have humility, and we have courage, which are the four components. If those are there, then there are some things that we can engage in that can help us and several practices, like the simplest practice we can do when we hear a good question, write it down. A lot of people feel like two things. They have to come up with all the questions themselves. You don't. I love questions. I'm pretty good at questions, but I don't generate all my questions. I've read them on billboards or heard them on a podcast or overheard somebody in line at Starbucks behind me. And you go, "Man, that's a really good question. Write it down." We think we're going to remember later, Laura, and that's the second thing. We won't. We have to write it down. And I just encourage people, open up the notes section of your phone and just have something on there that says great questions. When you hear of one, think of one, read of one in a good novel, write it on the list. You can always return to it later. So, just awareness, number one, that my radar is up, listening for good questions, can be a great start. And then also just to reflect later to say, "What was the best question I asked today or in that conversation or in that meeting or over dinner with my family? What was the best question I asked?" So, that's a little bit of reflection, but also preparation. Anytime we go into a meeting, anytime we go into any sort of connection, even if it's coffee with a friend, to always see if I can come with two questions ahead of time. Now, sometimes I write them down, sometimes I don't. I may not even get a chance to ask them, but just coming prepared where I say, "Oh, I'm meeting with my friend, Sam. Oh, Sam's dad just had significant surgery. So, here's an important question. Sam, how's your dad doing? And how are you doing as you care for your dad?" It's a little bit of preparation. It's not an hour. I'm just spending five minutes on my drive to the coffee shop to say, "My first question is going to be, Sam, how's your dad? And how are you doing caring for your dad?" So, just a little bit more thought. It doesn't require three times the amount of effort. Sometimes it's just five or 10% more effort and intentionality that can improve our question asking. Laura Dugger: (14:19 - 16:29) So much thoughtfulness there. Appreciate that. And now a brief message from our sponsor. With over 1,700 apartment units available throughout Pekin, Peoria, Peoria Heights, Morton, and Washington, and with every price range covered, you will have plenty of options when you rent through Leman Property Management Company. They have townhomes, duplexes, studios, and garden style options located in many areas throughout Pekin. And make sure you check out their newest offering; the McKinley located in Pekin is a new construction addition to their platinum collection. Featuring nine-foot ceilings, large spacious layouts, beautiful finishes such as quartz countertops and garages, you won't want to miss this outstanding new property. In Peoria, a historic downtown location and apartments adjacent to OSF Medical Center provide excellent choices. Check out their brand-new luxury property in Peoria Heights, overlooking the boutique shops and fine dining on Prospect. And in Morton, they offer a variety of apartment homes with garages, a hot downtown location, and now a brand-new high-end complex near Idlewood Park. If you want to become part of their team, contact them about open office positions. They're also hiring in their maintenance department. So, we invite you to find out why so many people have chosen to make a career with them. Check them out on Facebook today or email their friendly staff at leasing@lemanprops.com. You can also stop by their website at lemanproperties.com. Check them out and find your place to call home today. Clearly J.R., Jesus has been a role model for asking questions. So, can you contrast what you describe as Jesus's field trips that he takes his disciples on versus the way that you view Sunday mornings in a lot of churches in America? Can you kind of contrast those two? J.R. Briggs: (16:29 - 18:42) Yeah, oftentimes when I'm talking to pastors or leaders, faith leaders, I remind them of this. But yeah, Jesus loved to take his listeners on three field trips, three kinds. First one, he took them on physical field trips. We see that where Jesus says, "You know, look at the birds of the air, look at the lilies of the field," or "Look at the woman putting in two mites in the temple treasury." Life is a classroom. And so, he loved taking people on literal field trips. Number two, he took them on emotional field trips by telling them stories, not in abstract ways of thinking, but the kingdom of God is like a woman kneading dough. It's like a fisherman who caught fish. It's like a father with two sons. And I think we're wrapped up in that when we watch a good movie, and we cry and laugh and we're scared. Those are all because a beautiful story did something to us. It took us on some sort of emotional field trip. And then third is a mental field trip, which we're talking about here by asking questions. Jesus asked a ton of questions. And as a result of that, got people thinking in new ways. Now, if the way, the truth and the life, if anyone had the right to just give answers, it would be Jesus. But instead, he chose to ask a lot of questions. And so those three field trips, literal by going on walks, getting outside of a classroom, the mental field trip of asking questions and the emotional field trips of telling stories. Jesus did that all the time. Once you know that and you read the gospels, you'll see it everywhere. The problem is, as you were referring to, Laura, on Sunday mornings, what do we do? We sit people in a church in pews. Almost all of the teaching or formation happens in the same room. Instead of telling stories, we give abstract information. And instead of asking questions, we just give answers. And then we sit around and wonder, "Why is no one changing?" And my gentle encouragement is, what would it look like if we actually learned to teach others the way Jesus actually taught? Imagine that. So, it's a bit of a stretch because culturally we're kind of drawn in to the way we've always done it in church. And yet oftentimes Jesus did almost the opposite of the way in which we teach today. Laura Dugger: (18:44 - 18:55) And so, if you see that as an opposite, do you have any practical ideas of just a small tweak that we could make on Sunday mornings to be more like Jesus? J.R. Briggs: (18:56 - 20:32) Sure. I always try to say, is there any way I can get people's bodies or their hearts up out of the seat? So, "Hey, I want you to stand up and turn to the person next to you." Or, "Hey, we're going to move around the room." Some of you say, "What? We would never do that at our church." And I would say, take a risk. Jesus did all sorts of things that surprise people. So, how can I get their hearts and their bodies up out of their seat? Number one. Number two, can I tell a few more stories than I have in the past in my teaching or preaching or Sunday morning? And then also, can I engage with questions by asking them questions at the beginning? Can I leave them with some reflection questions in the bulletin or on the website the next week? Or can I actually have them asking questions of each other or of the text itself? And so oftentimes, why do I feel like I'm the one that has to speak the whole time when I'm preaching? What if instead I allow them to ask questions of each other, of God, and even of myself? And sometimes when I preach, I allow the last five or 10 minutes for people to ask questions about the text to myself and everyone else. Now, is that a change? Yeah. Would that freak out some churches? Maybe. But it can be a way that people walk away and say, "Wow, I learned, I was engaged, I was formed, and I encountered God in a new way that I haven't in the past." Which is the whole goal, that we don't just learn more about the Bible, is that we know the God of the Bible. That's the whole point of why we gather together as a church. Laura Dugger: (20:33 - 20:46) And that would be so memorable. But also, as you're speaking about stories, are you willing to share the story of one of the times that you asked a question, and it turned out better than you could have ever asked or hoped for? J.R. Briggs: (20:47 - 22:27) Yeah. I could think of several, but sometimes just asking people, "Why is that?" Just as a follow-up. It's amazing what can spill out. And I go, "Oh, that confronted my biases. That confronted my assumptions and what I thought about them." And so sometimes just asking some of that has been incredibly helpful to just ask that follow-up question. I won't tell the whole story that I recounted in the book, but oftentimes when there are tears, it was Charles Spurgeon that said that tears are like liquid prayers. And so, when people are showing some emotion, I sometimes will say to them, even if they're not a follower of Jesus, even if they're not religious, "I'm curious. It's been said that tears are liquid prayers. Can you put words to the prayers that your face is praying right now?" And I've had some of the most unbelievable conversations where people can identify the prayers that their face is praying. And even in my own life, where I just step back and go, "Why am I, why was I so moved by that novel? Why was I so moved by that movie? Or what just happened in front of me? Or why, where are these tears coming from?" As Frederick Buechner said, we'd be best to pay attention to our tears. And so that question of what are the liquid prayers, can I put words to the prayer that my face is praying has been an unbelievably meaningful and eye-opening thing for me and also with people that I've been with. Laura Dugger: (22:29 - 22:37) Will you also share about how you arrived at asking two questions that have opened numerous doors for you? J.R. Briggs: (22:38 - 25:21) Yeah. Yeah. When I was in college, I had the privilege of studying in Israel for the semester. This is fall of my junior year. Absolutely loved it. And our class was on a four-day field trip up around the Sea of Galilee. One night I was down by the lake and happened to notice as the sun was about to set that there was a big fishing vessel that had just come in. And I had always wanted to go fishing on the Sea of Galilee, not just take a boat, not just see fishermen, but like be on the boat and fish with fishermen. I don't even love fishing myself, but I just wanted to experience what Jesus and his disciples experienced on the lake. And there was a big industrial ship that came in. They brought in their day's catch. And I thought, "Oh, I should ask them if I can go fishing with them." And Laura, and then, you know, the realistic brain in me said, "Why would they ever allow a college, American college student and a study abroad program to go fishing with them tomorrow?" And I had these two questions that hit me, Laura. "Well, what's the worst they could say? No, or heck no, or get out of here. You're crazy." And number two, "Can I handle that? If they were to say that." Those two questions, I thought, "You know, I can handle it now. Let me ask what's the worst he could say. Let me ask." So, I went up and I said, "Excuse me, can I talk to your captain?" And they said, "Menachem is over here." So, I introduced myself to him and I said, "Menachem, I've always wanted to go fishing on the Sea of Galilee. I'll pay you $50. If I can go fishing for the day, use me as, as I mean, any work me to death. If you want, like I'm here, I just want to." And he looked at me, he said, "I don't want your money." He said, "Join me tomorrow morning at 6 a.m. And you can come fishing with us." And I walked away and went, "Unbelievable. My dream is coming true." And I had an unbelievable day, but I realized I can't say no for someone else. What's the worst they could say? No. Can I just ask and handle it if they said no? Yep, I can handle it. Those two questions, Laura, have shaped me immensely throughout my lifetime. I've really, I've done that in a lot of different ways. And a lot of times people say no, and I can handle that. But a lot of times people said yes. And some doors have opened simply because I asked. And I actually think of that verse often, Laura, where it says you do not have because you do not ask. It's not name it and claim it prosperity gospel. But we just have to realize that sometimes we just need to ask to put ourselves out there and see what people say. Laura Dugger: (25:23 - 25:55) That is so good. And I have applied those questions since reading that in your book, even as I reach out to ask you if you would do two recordings. So, I'm so grateful that that you said yes, I'm delighted that today's not our only conversation. But I'm curious also, J.R., when you had that experience, a lot of us may not ever get to go fish on the Sea of Galilee. So, did you learn anything that brought the Bible to life or anything about Jesus or anything that you can share with us from that incredible experience? J.R. Briggs: (25:55 - 27:37) Oh, there's so many, but I'll limit it to one. When we started out that morning, the sea was so calm. I mean, it was like glass. It was beautiful. The sun was rising, not a cloud in the sky. And it was great. But I've always wondered these like storms. You know, the Sea of Galilee is not a sea. It's a lake. It's 10 miles by six miles. It looks like a harp. And that's why it's called Lake Kinneret. In Hebrew, that means harp. So, it's harp lake is the way that we could call it. But I thought it's still a lake. How can there be storms that would have professional fishermen that would be screaming, thinking they were going to die? How is that possible? Well, wouldn't you know it, Laura? As beautiful as it was, the clouds rolled in. And then later that afternoon, there was a squall of a storm. I have never been in more intense in my life. And it happened right there. Now we're in a maybe two-ton, three-ton fishing vessel. But even that, we had to go below deck because it was so brutal. The waves, the wind, we couldn't see more than 10 feet in front of us. And I thought, "Ah, now I get it. If I'm just in a wooden boat with my fellow, you know, disciples here, I can see why this could get a little panicky." And that was, I think, a little God wink for me to be able to experience both the peace and calm, but also this treacherous storm and go, "Ah, now I won't read my Bible the same again when I hear about the, you know, the disciples freaking out with the storm or seeing Jesus walk on the water approaching them." So, that's one of many, but that sticks out to me a great deal that I got to experience a very intense storm. Laura Dugger: (27:38 - 28:27) That is so incredible. Even just going back, so those two questions that you were willing to ask led to this incredible experience. And now people from around the world get to benefit from the lessons that you learned at that time. So, I think you're giving us so much encouragement for asking questions. Guess what? We are no longer an audio only podcast. We now have video included as well. If you want to view the conversation each week, make sure you watch our videos. We're on YouTube and you can access videos or find answers to any of your other questions about the podcast when you visit thesavvysauce.com. What happens to our brain or within our brain when we're asking or being asked a question? J.R. Briggs: (28:28 - 30:19) Yeah, this was an incredibly fun part of the research for me was what does this do neurobiologically to us? And so, what neurologists have found is when they put nodes all over your brain to kind of see how the brain activity happens, when you're given information, your brain lights up. But what they found is when someone is asked a question, your brain explodes like fireworks, the synapses that are firing, and it just lights up like crazy, like fireworks in the night. And one of the things they said, as much as we think we can multitask, we can't. We do a lot of switching, task switching, but not multitasking. But they said what happens is they use the word hijack. You can hijack someone's brain when you actually are asking a question of someone, even if it's for two seconds. And so, if I were to ask your listeners, Laura, "What are the color of the shoes you're wearing right now?" Whether your listeners liked it or not, I just hijacked their brain for a split second there, and they went, "What are the color of my shoes?" And so that's immense amount of power to, quote unquote, hijack someone's brain. So, we need to use that power wisely. But it's an immense amount of power that we can have when we ask someone a question, not just give them an answer, which I love when current neurobiological research matches up with scripture and with the way Jesus taught. How did Jesus teach? A ton of questions. What happened? He engaged with people. They participated with him. They were forced to learn and be participants, not just talking theoretically about faith. And I thought, isn't that just like Jesus? He knew how our brains are wired. And so, he uses questions as a way of maximum connection, challenge, engagement, and formation. Laura Dugger: (30:20 - 30:43) Wow. And you've cultivated, like you say, this holy curiosity. So, I am curious for you, J.R., when you're in a conversation and you find yourself asking question after question, have you been in a situation like this where they don't reciprocate, they don't ask any questions back? And how do you handle that internally and externally? J.R. Briggs: (30:44 - 32:41) Yeah, it's hard because we live in a culture that hasn't modeled that well to ask good questions. And sometimes it's been hard. And I admit that sometimes there's a sense of loneliness. When I have a lunch meeting and my wife will say, "How was your lunch meeting today?" We have a code word where I say either waiter or waitress. And it means the waiter or waitress came and took my plate away because I was done with my meal before they had taken one or two bites of their food. And oftentimes that happens where we leave a meal and we realize, "I don't think I was asked a single question this whole lunch." Or we go to a dinner party, no one asked me a single question. And that can be really hard. And I love asking people questions. And it's not like I'm just ramming it down their throats to ask question after question like Elf with his brother walking through Central Park where he's just rattling off question after question. I was giving pause, I was taking a bite of my food, allowing them to ask a question or two, and they never did. And sometimes people say, "Well, I don't really know, I'm not good at questions." And I say, one of the simplest things you can do is what I call the way question, W-A-Y. It's just to say, "What about you?" I've been talking. What about you? To just hit the ball back over the net and to allow us to engage in some conversational pickleball. It's been on my side, let me hit it. Now it's on your side and you hit it back. That's how all healthy relationships exist. And so, it's been a little disappointing at times to realize you can go, and I'm sure you and others have experienced that. That's really hard. And to have people that can just say, "What about you? What do you think? Have you ever experienced that?" Or "I have another question for you." That's how healthy relationships are cultivated when there's that back and forth in conversation. Laura Dugger: (32:42 - 32:51) Okay. And so, if we want to cultivate that back-and-forth conversation, can you just share a few more tips for ways that we can level up our questions? J.R. Briggs: (32:52 - 34:24) Sure. Yeah. There's a unique, almost universal principle when it comes to question asking. If you ask a generic unthoughtful question, you will almost always get a generic unthoughtful answer. "How are you?" "Fine." "How's your weekend?" "Good." But if you ask a thoughtful, specific, engaging question, you almost always get a thoughtful, specific, engaging answer. It's as predictable as a communist election. It's amazing how that works, where we can just, if we can just level up. So, if a lazy question would be, "How was your weekend?" I encourage people to say, what would 10 or 15 percent of a more thoughtful, specific, or focused question be? So, you could say, "Of your whole weekend, how would you describe your weekend in two or three adjectives?" That's a little bit different than just, "How was your weekend?" Or, "Hey, how are you doing?" That's good. You might say, "What has been the most interesting thing about your day so far?" It just takes a little bit more intentionality. When you ask it that way, you won't get the fine, good. You'll get the, you know, "I had a really interesting sales meeting today at 10 a.m. You know, I bumped into my neighbor, and we had the best conversation at the mailbox." Those are the kinds of answers you get because we ask the more specific, thoughtful question. We'll get more specific and thoughtful answers. So, that's what I encourage people to do. Just level up to be just a little bit more pointed by 10 or 15 percent and see what happens. Laura Dugger: (34:26 - 34:40) Okay. So, hopefully we're all going to put this into practice. But then also, if we have children in our home, what can we do to be teaching them this same goal of reciprocity and asking great questions? J.R. Briggs: (34:40 - 37:02) Yes. I'm so glad you brought this up, Laura. There's so much that we can do. I try to do this. We try to do this with our kids when they were younger. Our kids are 19 and 16 now and we still engage in good questions with them. But when they were little, we would do things. I would crawl into bed with each of them at bedtime and we would do question of the night. And so, I would say, "You get to ask dad any question you want and then I get to ask you any question that you want." And so, age appropriate, you know, what's your favorite ice cream color or ice cream flavor or your favorite color? But sometimes they would pull out some really fascinating ones. Like one time, my youngest son said, "Dad, what does God smell like?" And it just made me laugh. I just thought, what a great question from a five- or six-year-old about that. And so just being intentional there at bedtime has been really good. Car time is really important. And I really try to see if I can ask some questions that I can't ask in other places because now I've got their full attention. We're in the car together. And even as my sons are now older, when they're in the car together, something about staring out the windshield together to be able to talk through some things has been really good. It could be about school, could be about life, could be something trivial, but to know that this is a place where we can talk. And so, car time, bedtime, and the last one I'll give is dinner time. We have a big chalk wall next to our dining room table. And we'll just randomly put up questions, thoughtful questions. And then we'll sometimes say after prayer, "Okay, boys, when they were little, you know, you each get to pick one question off the wall that we talk about tonight." And it just became a real easy way. And you can make up one if you want, or there are questions here. We also found a deck of cards that actually had questions on each one. It was like a questions deck. And so, we'll say, "Great, like you can pick off the wall, you can make up your own, or just pick a question that's in the deck." And just doing that where everybody got a chance to share around the table became such a way, such a rich conversation but a way to remind them questions are okay, encouraged, and a wonderful part of being a part of a family. Laura Dugger: (37:03 - 37:32) Those are such great ideas. I love that and that we can implement some of that right away. But as we're starting to wind our time down together, I would love to hear one more story about a time that a question dramatically changed the outcome of a friendly gathering that you write about on the back patio of a Capitol Hill home in Washington, D.C. Yeah, I remember reading this story, Laura, and I was so moved. J.R. Briggs: (37:32 - 39:52) I was moved to tears that I ran over to my wife and I said, "Listen to this story." And we both just sat there crying. Yeah, these families were on the back porch on a wonderful summer evening enjoying some stuff on the grill. And all of a sudden a gunman came up behind one of the teenage girls and held a gun to her head and said, "Nobody move, give me your money or I'm going to shoot." Everyone froze, rightfully so, the terror that they experienced. And one woman just blurted out the first thing that came to her mind. She said, "Why don't you sit down and have some wine with us?" Which is not something that has ever come to my mind if someone were to walk in and rob me. And sure enough, he put his gun in his belt and sat down and had some wine. And he said, "Boy, this is really good wine." And I said, "Why don't you enjoy some more to eat?" And then afterwards, she said, "Can I give you a hug?" And the guy was totally startled. Yeah. And then afterwards, everyone else decided to give him a hug. And as they enjoyed food, you know, they're all tense and not sure what to do or what's going on. At the end, he said, "Can I have a group hug together?" And then he slipped out the back and even the glass, the wine glass that he had, it wasn't even broken. He just set it up right behind the back gate. And I just was so moved by that. Like, "Do you want a glass of wine? Do you want a hug?" Not things that would come to my mind, but it was so jolting and surprising. I think it humanized him. And before he left, the robber said, "I think I've come to rob the wrong house tonight." It's amazing what a question can do. That was a question of immense hospitality. You're welcome here. That's the last thing that this robber ever expected. So, I just love that story. I love that story because it reminds us once again how powerful questions actually are. Laura Dugger: (39:53 - 40:09) And I think it illustrates at the heart of questions is love. And that motivates so much of the work that you get to do, J.R. So, can you just share a little bit more about the work you do get to do and share how we can be connected after this conversation? J.R. Briggs: (40:10 - 41:07) Sure. Yeah. I've been a pastor for 15 years, but in 2011, I started what's called Kairos Partnerships. And it was passionate about leaders because leadership can be lonely, overwhelming, and sometimes leaders feel ill-equipped. And so actually our organization was started based on three questions. Who pastors the pastor? Who leads the leader? Who shepherds the shepherd? So, we work with some pastors, but we work with all sorts of entrepreneurs and businesspeople and Chick-fil-A operators and college presidents and division one men's basketball coaches, anyone who's following Jesus, but leading others. And so, we do that through coaching, through consulting, through writing, speaking, spiritual direction. And so, our team, I have a wonderful team, and the team really walks alongside of leaders who are wanting to be equipped so they can lead with clarity and confidence moving forward. Laura Dugger: (41:08 - 41:27) I love that. Well, we will put a link to your website and the show notes for today's episode, but J.R., you may be familiar. We are called The Savvy Sauce because savvy is synonymous with practical knowledge. And so, as my final question for you today, what is your savvy sauce? J.R. Briggs: (41:28 - 42:03) One of the prayers that I pray regularly is, "Lord, would you grant me wisdom, courage, and compassion?" And all three of those are important because if I have wisdom and courage, but no compassion, I'm careless. If I have wisdom and compassion, but no courage, I'm riskless. And if I have compassion and courage, but no wisdom, that can be reckless. But if I have wisdom, courage, and compassion together, that's priceless. And so, I just try to pray that regularly because I say, "Lord, I want to be a wise, compassionate, courageous person for you." And I would encourage your listeners to pray that prayer for wisdom, courage, and compassion as well. Laura Dugger: (42:05 - 42:20) Those are great words that I would use to describe you, J.R. And you are humble and warm and engaging. And I have greatly appreciated your book. I've already told people it's my favorite book that I've read in recent history. J.R. Briggs: (42:20 - 42:22) So, thank you. Laura Dugger: (42:22 - 42:31) Well, thank you. That's very kind of you. Yes, very easy to compliment it. But thank you for being my guest, and I look forward to hosting you again next time. J.R. Briggs: (42:31 - 42:33) Sounds great. Looking forward to that as well. Laura Dugger: (42:35 - 45:49) One more thing before you go, have you heard the term gospel before? It simply means good news. And I want to share the best news with you, but it starts with the bad news. Every single one of us were born sinners, but Christ desires to rescue us from our sin, which is something we cannot do for ourselves. This means there's absolutely no chance we can make it to heaven on our own. So, for you and for me, it means we deserve death, and we can never pay back the sacrifice we owe to be saved. We need a savior, but God loved us so much. He made a way for his only son to willingly die in our place as the perfect substitute. This gives us hope of life forever in right relationship with him. That is good news. Jesus lived the perfect life. We could never live and died in our place for our sin. This was God's plan to make a way to reconcile with us so that God can look at us and see Jesus. We can be covered and justified through the work Jesus finished. If we choose to receive what he has done for us, Romans 10:9 says, “that if you confess with your mouth, Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved.” So, you pray with me now. Heavenly father, thank you for sending Jesus to take our place. I pray someone today right now is touched and chooses to turn their life over to you. Will you clearly guide them and help them take their next step in faith to declare you as Lord of their life? We trust you to work and change lives now for eternity. In Jesus name we pray. Amen. If you prayed that prayer, you are declaring him for me. So, me for him, you get the opportunity to live your life for him. And at this podcast, we're called The Savvy Sauce for a reason. We want to give you practical tools to implement the knowledge you have learned. So, you're ready to get started. First, tell someone, say it out loud, get a Bible. The first day I made this decision, my parents took me to Barnes and Noble and let me choose my own Bible. I selected the Quest NIV Bible and I love it. You can start by reading the book of John. Also get connected locally, which just means tell someone who's a part of a church in your community that you made a decision to follow Christ. I'm assuming they will be thrilled to talk with you about further steps such as going to church and getting connected to other believers to encourage you. We want to celebrate with you too. So, feel free to leave a comment for us here. If you did make a decision to follow Christ, we also have show notes included where you can read scripture that describes this process. And finally, be encouraged. Luke 15:10 says, “in the same way, I tell you, there is rejoicing in the presence of the angels of God over one sinner who repents.” The heavens are praising with you for your decision today. And if you've already received this good news, I pray you have someone to share it with. You are loved and I look forward to meeting you here next time.
Carson Gourdie from ABC20 joins The Drive to preview opening night of high school football across Central Illinois, including the teams, storylines, players and matchups worth watching as the 2026 season gets underway. Carson also breaks down the latest bombshell in the NCAA's eligibility battle. The U.S. Tenth Circuit granted the NCAA's request to stay the nationwide injunction in Wisne v. NCAA, putting the potential fifth season for qualifying Class of 2022 athletes on hold while the appeal continues. The ruling is particularly complicated for college football players because the decision comes just days before the season begins. While the nationwide protection has been stayed, athletes who obtained separate state-court restraining orders may still have eligibility protection. That creates a confusing patchwork where some players can potentially play while similarly situated players cannot.
Greg and Dan talk with Shawn Potts, Race Director and Promoter of the Peoria TT, about the 79th running of the world-famous Peoria TT, happening Saturday, August 22, at the Peoria Motorcycle Club. The historic race has been held since 1947 and brings Progressive American Flat Track racing to one of the sport’s most iconic courses, known for its unique layout and famous jump. Shawn previews what motorcycle fans can expect throughout race day, including practice, qualifying, fan activities, and the main events, while also covering what spectators can and cannot bring to the grounds. He also discusses the involvement of Walters Brothers Harley-Davidson and more surrounding this longtime Central Illinois motorcycle tradition. Tickets are $30 in advance and can also be purchased on race day. Kids 12 and under get in free. Peoria TT tickets and informationSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
EP 301: Dan Learned, Director of Heart of Illinois Youth for Christ, joins Andy and Chuck in the studio for an honest and hope-filled conversation about reaching this generation with the Gospel.Dan gives us a front-row look at what teenagers are facing today—from anxiety, loneliness, social media pressure, and questions about identity to the deep need every young person has to know they are seen, valued, and loved. But despite the challenges, Dan sees plenty of reasons to be encouraged about this generation.We talk about Dan's own faith journey, his calling to youth ministry, what Youth for Christ is doing throughout Central Illinois, and why building genuine relationships with young people matters more than ever. Dan also shares powerful stories of lives being changed when caring adults simply show up, listen, and point students toward Jesus.If you care about teenagers, have teenagers, work with teenagers—or simply want to see this generation encounter Jesus—this conversation is for you.
On this week's episode of Out and About, Mae Gilliland of ArtsPartners of Central Illinois talks with Joyce Blank of Gems of the Prairie Quilters about the group's annual quilt show, taking place Aug. 22 and 23 at the Life Together Center in Peoria.
On this week's episode of Out and About, Mae Gilliland of ArtsPartners of Central Illinois talks with Barry Cloyd about For What It's Worth: A Tribute to Stephen Stills in Song & Story, coming Aug. 22 to the Contemporary Art Center of Peoria. Blending live music with storytelling, the multimedia performance traces Stills' career through Buffalo Springfield, Crosby, Stills, Nash & Young and his solo work.
Greg and Yvonne talk with Julie Traekenschuh about the upcoming annual Ignite Peoria, happening Saturday from 9 a.m. to 5 p.m. at the Peoria Civic Center. She explains that Ignite Peoria is a free, community-driven celebration of creativity featuring local artists, musicians, makers, performers, innovators, and hands-on activities for all ages. She discusses ArtsPartners' mission to strengthen the arts throughout Central Illinois, highlights the event's free admission and free parking, and shares why she's passionate about bringing the community together to support local artists and celebrate creativity.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
On August 5, 1994, Decatur Realtor Sherry Lewis left to show a home. She never came home. More than three decades later, her murder remains unsolved. In this special anniversary episode, American Dread revisits one of Central Illinois' most haunting cold cases and the ongoing search for justice. Check out our new American Hauntings Podcast Network for even more spooky shows.Have a question or comment? Text us on the Haunt Line @ 217-791-7859New Facebook page - https://www.facebook.com/troytaylorodditiesCheck out our updated website and sign up for our newsletter at AmericanHauntingsPodcast.comWant an episode every week, plus other awesome perks and discounts? Check out our Patreon pageFind out merch at AmericanHauntingsClothing.comFollow us on Twitter @AdamsLife365, @AmerHauntsPod, @TroyTaylor13, @CodyBeckSTLFollow us on Instagram @AmericanHauntingsPodcast, @AdamsLife365, @TroyTaylorgram, @CodyBeckSTLThis episode was written and produced by Adam White.Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy
Greg and Yvonne talk with Jeff Kohlbus, Central Illinois Chapter Executive Committee Member for Tee It Up for the Troops, and Drake Scott, Founder and Executive Director of The Resilience Project, about their shared commitment to supporting veterans throughout Central Illinois. The two organizations work together to improve the lives of veterans by connecting them with resources, wellness programs, and community support. Jeff previews the 17th Annual Central Illinois Tee It Up for the Troops Golf Classic on Monday, August 10, reflecting on the event's history, his involvement since the beginning, and what participants can expect throughout the day. Drake explains the mission of The Resilience Project, which helps veterans improve their physical and mental well-being through fitness, community engagement, and support services, while discussing the life-changing impact these programs have on local veterans. For more information, visit www.resilienceproject.net and https://teeitupforthetroops.org/event/golf-peoria-2026/.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
August 3, 2026 - Dr. Juanita Morris of the Jerry J. Dawson Civic Leadership Institute and Amber Kaylor of the Ronald McDonald House Charities of Central Illinois joined Byers & Co to talk about the DCLI Awards and upcoming programming, and RMHC summer updates. Listen to the podcast now!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
A look at the week in Central Illinois and across the world from Peoria's breaking news station, 1470 and 100.3 WMBD for the week of 7/26 - 8/1.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Greg and Yvonne talk with Chris Setti about the origins of the Greater Peoria Economic Development Council, which began 45 years ago during a time when community leaders recognized the need to strengthen the region's economy. He reflects on the early conversations and partnerships that laid the foundation for the organization and discusses how its mission has evolved into promoting Peoria and Central Illinois as a great place to live, work, and invest. He also shares how the GPEDC continues to attract new opportunities, improve the regional economy, and ensure Peoria remains competitive and relevant for businesses, residents, and future generations.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
On this week's episode of Out and About, Mae Gilliland of ArtsPartners of Central Illinois talks with Rhonda Ossola Parker of the Italian American Society about the annual Summer Festa Picnic on Aug. 9 at Hickory Grove Park. Celebrating its 95th year, the family-friendly event features authentic Italian food, live music, artisan vendors, bocce, spaghetti-eating contests and a special tribute to the 100th anniversary of Agatucci's Restaurant.
Ozzy Osbourne's fourth solo effort, The Ultimate Sin, was released on January 24, 1986. Produced by Ron Nevison and including band members Randy Castillo, Jake E Lee, and Phil Soussan, it rocketed up the charts with hot single "Shot In The Dark." For this latest A-SIDES episode, three guests share their stories of discovering Ozzy, collecting albums, concert memories, and more! Huge thanks to these guys- Brent Stortzum, A-SIDES co-host and musician Patrick Kennison, of Heaven Below and Lita Ford's live band Kenny Peak, first time guest of Central Illinois band, Killer of Giants Thanks for listening to Episode 240 of A-SIDES as we celebrate 40 Years of The Ultimate Sin!
On this week's episode of Out and About, Mae Gilliland of ArtsPartners of Central Illinois talks with Roseanne Urbanc of Chillicothe Players Theatre about their upcoming production of "The Great Gatsby."
The July 22, 2026, edition of the Closing Market Report, hosted by Todd Gleason, provides a comprehensive update on agricultural markets, policy news, and weather forecasts. Market analyst Greg Johnson highlights a recent rally in soybean and wheat prices fueled by strong domestic crush demand and geopolitical tensions in the Black Sea, which has encouraged cash sales among Central Illinois farmers. The news segment covers significant staffing reductions at local Natural Resources Conservation Service (NRCS) offices that threaten conservation programs, alongside a report on the looming economic impact of new Section 301 tariffs following a recent Supreme Court ruling. Finally, meteorologist Drew Lerner offers a weather outlook, noting favorable crop conditions in the eastern Corn Belt while warning of persistent heat and dryness that threaten crops and livestock across the western plains, the Dakotas, and the Delta region.01:56 Ag Markets with Greg Johnson, TGM Total Grain Marketing10:57 24 Illinois Counties Lose Half or All NRCS Staffing11:59 Trump Tariffs Still Looming over Economy14:33 Ag Weather with Drew Lerner, World Weather Inc. ★ Support this podcast ★
Kelly recaps the recent fundraising event, discusses the need for volunteers, how to become involved, and more on the WRAM Morning Show.
On this week's episode of Out and About, Mae Gilliland of ArtsPartners of Central Illinois talks with Cory Boulton of Bradley University about The Lost Birds, a powerful choral work presented by the Gratus Choral Ensemble on July 26 at First Federated Church at 4 p.m.
The July 15, 2026, edition of the Closing Market Report highlights the current agricultural commodity markets and upcoming weather patterns influencing crop production. Host Todd Gleason discusses a recent surge in wheat futures driven by supply fears following Russian military attacks on Ukrainian ports, particularly Odesa, shifting the focus away from traditional weather factors. In the ag market segment, Greg Johnson notes that Central Illinois crops are generally performing well, prompting farmers to hold out for stronger prices, though fund activity remains neutral to long. Additionally, the program details upcoming regional agricultural events, including University of Illinois Extension field days and webinars focused on soybean breeding and agricultural AI applications.The second half of the program transitions to regional and international ag weather with Drew Lerner from World Weather Inc.. Lerner breaks down the stressful but manageable heat impacts across the northern Corn Belt, noting that while the upper Missouri River Basin faces high temperatures and dryness, areas like the Red River Valley are insulated by recent heavy rainfall. The international segment details a severe and expanding drought in Western Europe, where central France and the UK face massive precipitation deficits threatening summer crops like sugar beets. Conversely, weather conditions remain favorable for crop maturation in the Black Sea region, making the current market volatility strictly a reflection of regional war developments rather than climate failures.01:21 Ag Markets with Greg Johnson, Total Grain Marketing 11:59 Ag Weather with Drew Lerner, World Weather Inc. ★ Support this podcast ★
On this week's episode of Out and About, Mae Gilliland of ArtsPartners of Central Illinois talks with Salil Bavdekar of Heartland Latin Dancers about Latin Dance Night at Casa de Arte, located in Peoria's Warehouse District. Held on the last Saturday of every month, the evening features a beginner-friendly dance lesson followed by an outdoor social dance where no partner or experience is required.
July 6, 2026 - Amber Kaylor of the Ronald McDonald House Charities of Central Illinois joined Byers & Co to talk about their upcoming golf outing, adding services for high-risk expecting mothers, future facilities, and the opening of their family room. Listen to the podcast now!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
The Chicago Series of Poker is back, and The Overlay is breaking down everything players need to know before the cards hit the air.This episode dives into the full CSOP schedule featuring 50 poker events, mixed games, deepstacks, specialty tournaments, and 40 Main Event seats being awarded throughout the series. From No-Limit Hold'em grinders to mixed-game sickos, there is something for every kind of poker player.The series builds all summer long toward the $400 CSOP Main Event on Labor Day weekend, one of the biggest charity poker tournaments of the year in Chicagoland. We talk structures, seat giveaways, points races, tournament value, and why the CSOP has become a must-play poker series for local players.Shuffle up, lock in, and start planning your CSOP run.The Overlay a poker podcast ♧♢♡♤If you enjoy our show, please subscribe and leave us a 5-star review on Apple Podcasts. If you are listing on Spotify, please hit that follow button. Wherever you listen to our podcast please share us with your friends or enemies (however you see fit) and we thank you for supporting our poker podcast.Do you have questions or suggestions for the show? Do you want Brandon to go over a hand you just played? Do you have a prop bet story for Ken? Please send us a tweet or direct message on Twitter.Follow us on Twitter @theoverlaypod and check out our website at LinkTr.ee/theoverlaypod or search for and listen to The Overlay a poker podcast on all major podcast apps and platforms.A BIG THANK YOU TO OUR SPONSORS:Are you in the Chicago area?Check out CCGpoker.com for weekend charity poker events with great tournaments and cash game action.Are you in the Central Illinois area?Check out CICGpoker.com for local charity poker events brought to you by Central Illinois Charitable Games. Tournaments and Cash Games every Saturday in Central Illinois locations
On this week's episode of Out and About, Mae Gilliland of ArtsPartners of Central Illinois talks with Jake Bowers of Peoria Proud about this year's River City Pride Festival on July 18 at the Peoria RiverFront. The free festival features live entertainment, community organizations, interactive art, food vendors, educational programming and a new Artist Row showcasing local creatives.
Hey friend, welcome back to REALIFE Conversations from the Porch. I'm coming to you on a rainy Saturday morning in Central Illinois with something I've been sitting with for a while — and I think it's finally time to say it out loud. I've been teaching time management for almost ten years. And I think I've been using the wrong word. The word that keeps surfacing for me — the one that changes the whole posture — is stewardship. Managing something implies you're in charge of it. But friend, you and I were never in charge of our time. We all get the same twenty-four hours. We don't control time — we live inside it. Stewardship starts somewhere different. It says: this day, this week, this life has been gifted to me. Mine to tend to. And the way I spend it tells a true story about what I actually believe and what I actually value. The four purposeful areas — Present Time, People Time, Project Time, and Prep Time — aren't going anywhere. But when I approach them from stewardship rather than management, something deepens. I'm not just scheduling anymore. I'm tending. I'll leave you with this: Does the way you're spending your time feel like someone who knows they've been given a gift? Or does it feel like you're just trying to survive the week? We can change it — slowly, intentionally, with a lot of grace. That's the Real Life Process. FREE RESOURCES • Listen to our sister podcast the REALIFE Practice Podcast on your favorite podcast app! • Ready to discover what uniquely matters to YOU? Click here to take our FREE Intro to the Needs & Values Assessment. → https://byf.therealifeprocess.com/needs-values • Ready to uncover more time on your calendar? This FREE download will help you remove what doesn't matter, so you have space for what does. → https://www.therealifeprocess.com/freeoffer OTHER RESOURCES • Prefer to watch and listen? Check out our YouTube Channel — subscribe so you get all the latest updates. → https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCDgZh9XIoKi4hyfBrf6jA3w • Do What Matters, Live from Rest Not Rush by Teresa McCloy is available now! Banish busyness and discover a new way of being productive around what truly matters. → DoWhatMattersBook.com • Discover Life Mapping tools to help you recognize and respond to God in your story — new digital downloads for personal or professional use. → www.onelifemaps.com
On this week's episode of Out and About, Dr. Mae Gilliland of ArtsPartners of Central Illinois talks with Dr. David Vroman, director of the Peoria Municipal Band, about the band's 89th season of free summer concerts.
On this week's episode of Out and About, Dr. Mae Gilliland of ArtsPartners of Central Illinois talks with Emily Huff about the new West Peoria Farmers Market, held every Wednesday from 4 p.m. to 7 p.m. at the Franciscan Recreation Complex.
Author Ken Liu was born in China in 1976, and his family emigrated to the U.S. when he was 11. He has published multiple collections of short stories and an epic series of novels. Several of his works have been made into films , including “Good Hunting,” which was part of the Netflix animated anthology series Love, Death and Robots. He's also known for translating the Chinese sci-fi series known as The Three Body Problem. Based in the Boston suburbs, Liu visited Central Illinois back in 2024 for a talk at the Champaign Public Library on art and artificial intelligence. That's when we first aired this conversation, in which he talks about trading a traditional job for writing full time, what's unique about Chinese science fiction, and why he's excited for the possibilities of artificial intelligence.
On this week's episode of Out and About, Dr. Mae Gilliland of ArtsPartners of Central Illinois talks with Nikki Wheeler, special events assistant at Five Points Washington, about the upcoming Community Art Fair on June 20. This curated outdoor event brings together regional artists, live music and hands-on art activities for children in a welcoming, community-centered setting.
Hickory Point Bank on Wabash Avenue hosts the show and the annual Operation Cookie Share as the Girl Scouts of Central Illinois collect donations to provide cookies to military troops, first responders and healthcare workers as Luke Worrell of Worrell Land Services and HPB's Connor Etheridge stop by. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Operation Cookie Share is underway at Hickory Point Bank as HPB's Jeff Raes and Beth Allen of the Girl Scouts of Central Illinois explain how to donate cookies to the troops, first responders and healthcare workers. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Dianne shares personal stories and revelation concerning faith, trust and healing, as well as important principles listed below. These are foundations that Holy Spirit laid, that still remain a part of the Vineyard Church of Central Illinois.- JESUS WILL ALWAYS BE THE HERO. HE IS THE HEALER.- We will always believe the incredible truth that our God is a God of healing. He wants us whole in every way, and He wants us to give that away to others.- We will always welcome and honor the Holy Spirit and His fresh infilling.- We will always make God's Word our top priority for studying, meditating, confessing, and believing.- We will always make faith a priority — trusting God through difficult times, persevering, worshiping and praising, and hanging on no matter what.- We will always believe in the power of prayer.- We will always be hungry, humble, and teachable and stay committed to doing life in community--the church family.
On this week's episode of Out and About, Dr. Mae Gilliland of ArtsPartners of Central Illinois talks with Chanel Hargrave-Murray of the Peoria Park District about Jubilee Day: A Juneteenth Celebration, taking place June 19 on the Peoria RiverFront. The free community event blends live entertainment, cultural experiences, family activities, food vendors, storytelling, an Ancestor Tree Activation Station and much more. The evening concludes with a special Juneteenth-themed drone show over the riverfront.
I'm thrilled to welcome back a previous guest today! Her first appearance was in Episode 232 back in 2020. She helps us get clear on something that confuses many coaches: What does it mean to be “trauma-informed,” and why does it matter for every single one of our clients? We will uncover the neuroscience, practical moves, and the truth about what's happening in the nervous systems of the people we coach. We take a closer look at the difference between coaching and therapy, why there is always an overlap, and where the dividing line lies between big emotions, coaching, and therapy. Join us!Dr. Kemia Sarrah, “Dr. K”, is an internist, educator, physician, and leadership coach. Her subspecialty is a focus on leadership and coaching in and beyond severe burnout, toxic stress, and trauma. She is the founder and CEO of Lodestar, a professional coaching and consulting firm that utilizes a 360-degree trauma-aware container for coaching, coach training, leadership training, and Justice, Equity, Diversity & Inclusion facilitation. Her medical degree and Master of Public Health are from the University of Utah School of Medicine, and she currently serves as an Adjunct Assistant Professor at Southern Illinois University School of Medicine in the Office of Equity, Diversity & Inclusion. Dr. K is a gifted storyteller and sought-after speaker with a deeply intuitive communication style, and her trademarked coaching paradigm has a lens focused on the secondary trauma that is part of daily life for high-achieving, hard-driving, and highly skilled professionals across various industries. Blending extensive experience with balance, humor, and endless empathy, Dr. K has helped countless physicians and professionals rediscover their professional pride, joy, and internal balance. She lives with her physician-husband on a small, working farm in Central Illinois, where they are raising four sons and too many farm critters to count.Show Highlights:The question at the crux of it all: How can coaching and trauma co-exist in the same work?All Lodestar programs are dual-accredited by the ICF and the ACCME, meeting the rigorous standards for both coaching and medical education.Understanding the overlaps and distinctions between coaching and therapyPositioning yourself as a coach who is trauma-informed and trauma-responsive, being a “skilled holder” of what the client brings into the conversationLaying the foundation of the coach/client relationship in the beginningTrauma: more than events in time, but exposure over time (“The dose makes the poison.”)Understanding stress (not always a bad thing!), its effects, like loneliness and uncertainty, and long-term stress exposureThe neuroscience of the “unsafe” brain: It cannot update its predictions, learns the wrong things, and cannot differentiate between predator threats and social threats.Recognizing the path forward with our clients: The stories our nervous system tells follow the state of our nervous system as a whole.“We are all the walking wounded. What you are experiencing is very real.”The key message from Dr. K: “Coaches are uniquely pre-set to do this exceedingly well. The beauty of this skillset is that it's rooted in the similarities of our nervous system; these skills are universally teachable, learnable, and applicable.”Resources:Connect with Dr. Kemia SarrafWebsite, Facebook, and SCS Episode 232Connect with MegExplore the STaR Coach Show Mentor Program. We are enrolling NOW for this fall!Join the STaR Coach Community. Become a member today!Subscribe to the STaR Coach Show YouTube Channel!Explore over 480 past episodes and other helpful resources at www.STaRcoachshow.com.Mentioned in this episode:Join the Star Coach Masterclass!Learn the 6 C's to your Coaching Masterplan.
June 3, 2026 - Tanya Andricks and Dr. Amanda Rubush of DMH joined Byers & Co to talk about Dr. Rubush's path to Memorial, her preference to keep Central Illinois as her home, and the importance of preventative medicine. Listen to the podcast now!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
On this week's episode of Out and About, Dr. Mae Gilliland of ArtsPartners of Central Illinois talks with Marc Supreme of Strictly Hip Hop 90.7 FM about this year's YANI Collective Juneteenth Fest taking place June 13 at the Peoria Riverfront.
For this special full band interview, heavy Central Illinois rock band heaving. joins A-SIDES for Episode 233. Following the release of a new single titled "Faces On You" onto Bandcamp and all music streaming platforms on May 20th, the band discusses their origins, favorite bands and artists in their formative years, setting themselves apart, and even what they hope to accomplish throughout 2026. Thanks to Morgan, Bowie, Trevor and Tyler for the fun conversation. Check out their music and merch on Bandcamp and follow them on their social media pages for new music and show dates!
On this week's episode of Out and About, Dr. Mae Gilliland of ArtsPartners of Central Illinois talks with Alissa Williams of the Morton Public Library about the return of the library's popular Groove in the Garden Concert Series.
On this week's episode of Out and About, Dr. Mae Gilliland of ArtsPartners of Central Illinois talks with Diane Hahn, co-founder of Mackinaw Valley Vineyard, about the upcoming Mackinaw Music, International Wine, and Craft Beer Festival taking place Memorial Day weekend. The two-day event features live music, local food vendors, and the chance to sample wines and craft beers from around the world.
What Books are Healthiest for Your Tween or Teen an Interview with Betsy Farquhar and Hayley Morell (Episode 293) *Disclaimer: Some of this content is not intended for young audiences. Please use discretion. Proverbs 4:7 NIV “The beginning of wisdom is this: Get wisdom. Though it cost all you have, get understanding.” *Transcription Below* Betsy Farquhar holds Masters degrees in Children's Literature and Information and Library Science. She taught middle and high school English, homeschooled her three children, and has served on many book award committees. Hayley Morell loves reading, writing, trying new recipes, knitting, or chatting with her parrot. Hayley loves traveling and lived abroad in Europe and Asia. She and her husband and infant live in Wisconsin in an old house overflowing with books and are active in their local community. Their Website, Book, and Social Media Handles: Instagram @redeemed_reader and Facebook: @redeemedreader Thank you to our sponsor: Sam Leman Eureka Questions and Topics We Cover: What are some benefits of reading and why is it worthwhile to devote our time to curating a healthy diet of books? Can you elaborate on why the Young Adult or YA category is the most controversial? What is on your radar for genres or books that will require even more discernment in the future? Other Savvy Sauce Episode Mentioned: 21. Promoting a Family Culture of Reading with Megan Kaeb 22. Inspiring Your Children to Become Readers, Part Two with Megan Kaeb 253. Low Tech Parenting with Erin Loechner 273. Wise Living: Why to Get Outside, and Travel, and Read Aloud with Amber O'Neal Johnston Connect with The Savvy Sauce on Facebook or Instagram or Our Website Gospel Scripture: (all NIV) Romans 3:23 “for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God,” Romans 3:24 “and are justified freely by his grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus.” Romans 3:25 (a) “God presented him as a sacrifice of atonement, through faith in his blood.” Hebrews 9:22 (b) “without the shedding of blood there is no forgiveness.” Romans 5:8 “But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” Romans 5:11 “Not only is this so, but we also rejoice in God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have now received reconciliation.” John 3:16 “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.” Romans 10:9 “That if you confess with your mouth, “Jesus is Lord,” and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved.” Luke 15:10 says “In the same way, I tell you, there is rejoicing in the presence of the angels of God over one sinner who repents.” Romans 8:1 “Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus” Ephesians 1:13–14 “And you also were included in Christ when you heard the word of truth, the gospel of your salvation. Having believed, you were marked in him with a seal, the promised Holy Spirit, who is a deposit guaranteeing our inheritance until the redemption of those who are God's possession- to the praise of his glory.” Ephesians 1:15–23 “For this reason, ever since I heard about your faith in the Lord Jesus and your love for all the saints, I have not stopped giving thanks for you, remembering you in my prayers. I keep asking that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the glorious Father, may give you the spirit of wisdom and revelation, so that you may know him better. I pray also that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you, the riches of his glorious inheritance in the saints, and his incomparably great power for us who believe. That power is like the working of his mighty strength, which he exerted in Christ when he raised him from the dead and seated him at his right hand in the heavenly realms, far above all rule and authority, power and dominion, and every title that can be given, not only in the present age but also in the one to come. And God placed all things under his feet and appointed him to be head over everything for the church, which is his body, the fullness of him who fills everything in every way.” Ephesians 2:8–10 “For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith – and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God – not by works, so that no one can boast. For we are God‘s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.“ Ephesians 2:13 “But now in Christ Jesus you who once were far away have been brought near through the blood of Christ.“ Philippians 1:6 “being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.” *Transcription* Music: (0:00 – 0:11) Laura Dugger: (0:12 - 1:46) Welcome to The Savvy Sauce, where we have practical chats for intentional living. I'm your host, Laura Dugger, and I'm so glad you're here. The principles of honesty and integrity that Sam Leman founded his business on continue today over 55 years later at Sam Leman Chevrolet Eureka. Owned and operated by the Bertschi family, Sam Leman and Eureka appreciates the support they've received from their customers all over Central Illinois and beyond. Visit them today at lemangm.com. My guests for today are Betsy Farquhar and Haley Morrill, two of the four authors of this book, The Redeemed Reader, which is also the name of the website that they run together where they have thousands of book reviews for children and tweens and teens. We all know that books are so powerful, so it's vitally important that we're discerning both for what we're intaking and the filters that we use to allow our children to engage with books in our home. We're going to sprinkle book recommendations throughout this episode, and you're also going to learn some surprising things, such as more details about the YA or young adult category. Here's our chat. Welcome to The Savvy Sauce, Betsy and Haley. Betsy Farquhar: (1:48 - 1:49) Thanks. It's good to be here. Laura Dugger: (1:50 - 1:57) I would love to just start out hearing the way that the two of you found your way into the work that you get to do today. Betsy Farquhar: (1:58 - 2:42) Mine started way back in the 1900s when I was in college. I did my senior thesis on children's literature, George MacDonald, and that led to a children's literature class my last semester, which led me to grad school with one of my now co-workers, but at the time fellow students and friends, and we got our master's in children's literature. And then rabbit trail, lots of detours, children, marriage. She and I started a blog back when those were cool and hip, and it was reviewing children's books and that was just for fun. And then we connected with Janie and Emily from Redeemed Reader. Through that blog venue, we were commenting on each other's blogs, and they brought us on board. And so here we are 15 years later. Hayley Morell: (2:43 - 3:38) And for me, I was a high schooler. I was homeschooled. I loved reading. So, I started my own blog back in the teenage years and I was always looking for book recommendations and came upon Redeemed Reader in the early days. I turned out they were looking for an intern. I started interning and at the end of my internship, Emily Witten, who was our founder, asked if I'd like to stay on. And that was 14 or 15 years ago now. So, I was younger. And so, I had a period at college. I studied at Boyce College. I worked in children's ministry and worked as a private tutor. So, a lot of interactions with children. I was known as the babysitter with the book bag for a number of years. And now I've got my own little, and so I'm in the land of board books and happily working at Redeemed Reader. Laura Dugger: (3:39 - 3:49) I love hearing that. And if people are watching this through video, can you both just say your name, so we know who's Betsy and who's Haley? I'm Haley. Betsy Farquhar: (3:50 - 3:51) I'm Betsy. Laura Dugger: (3:52 - 4:07) Okay, wonderful. Thank you for that. And at Redeemed Reader, I'm assuming you have so many book recommendations to try and read and review. So, how do you even determine which books you are going to review? Hayley Morell: (4:08 - 7:49) So, right now we are wrapping up one of the things we love doing, which is providing award coverage. In January is when the American Library Association announces their awards, and they like to recognize the best middle grade with the Newberry, the best picture books with the Caldecott, and then a number of other awards. We know that those books are going to be going into lots of libraries and schools. And so, we like to provide coverage of that and review those books that we know parents are going to be seeing on shelves and wondering, is this a good book? Should we be reading this? What do we want to check out? We also like to watch what is popular. What is causing discussion? So, several years ago, that was The Hunger Games. And there was a lot of questions about dystopia. Should we be reading this? Is this helpful? Do I want my teen reading The Hunger Games? More recently, some popular middle grade series like Keeper of the Lost Cities have had a lot of parents asking, what is this series? Is there anything I should know about? And so, we try to have a balanced review. We review books that you're going to find at the library. We also like to review books that maybe you wouldn't know about. So, a smaller Christian imprint, for example, we like to review that type of book to encourage readers to read widely, to read Christian authors, to read secular authors. We like books. And so, we each bring our own specialty to the team and experience. Janie, who's our senior editor, is a children's author. She loves history. And so, as the community relations manager, I tend to handle review requests. So, when somebody asks us, can you review this book? It's popular. Or I'm an author. I wrote a book. Can you review it? I'll look at the book. I'll look at how hard is it to get? We do try to review books that are easy to find, that you might find in your local library. But then I'll look at our team. So, for Janie, if it is going to be a nonfiction history, let's say for a 10 to 12-year-old, I know that's going to be up her alley. Meanwhile, Betsy loves poetry. She loves nature, nonfiction. Betsy is a very, I'd say you're one of our Renaissance people. And so, I know Betsy is going to be inclined towards maybe a novel and verse. And she also likes dealing with high school books. You've got that teacher education background, where if it is an epic poem, Betsy is going to be our reviewer. Megan is our amazing picture book author. She's super creative, loves picture books. Megan is who I turn to when I find a picture book. Meanwhile, I used to handle as I was the team member of the team and then turned into my 20s. So, I gravitated toward YA, and I still love a good YA fantasy. But I am now in board book land and picture books. So, I have been expanding my reach. I do serve on our middle grade fiction, so I can help out with middle grades. But each of us will flex in, flex out. Megan has a large family of boys. And so, if it's a boy book, she is a great person. We love to send those to her to see if her boys like them. And that's, I could keep going because we love books, but that's a big snapshot. Laura Dugger: (7:50 - 8:09) That's so helpful because you cover such a wide variety of books throughout your team. And as curators of book reviews, what questions are you most commonly receiving, both from young people and maybe their parents as well? Hayley Morell: (8:12 - 9:22) I think we often get questions like, is this book clean? Is this book safe? And we like to kind of change that question. And we like to say, why is the content in this book? Because that can be different, you know, depending on something that is in a picture book, which wouldn't be appropriate for an age, could be very appropriate for a YA book and a great discussion starter. So, it definitely depends on the content and what audience and what age of the audience we're dealing with. So, we try to, as people ask us, well, is this safe or is this clean? Should I read this? We want to build discernment and encourage parents to interact, parents and educators to interact with our reviews. And they know their reader. They know how their reader is going to receive a book. And what questions might come up. And so, we like to help interact with that conversation. And then there's another kind of question we often get, which I'm going to let Betsy answer. Betsy Farquhar: (9:23 - 10:10) The other question is, my kid likes blank kind of book or is blank kind of reader. What do I get for him or her? And so that, of course, can vary widely. But people love to know what book is right for my family or my classroom or my child. And so, we try to write our reviews with that question in mind, not to make a blanket statement, you should all read this book, or nobody should read this book, but to give parents and educators enough information to make that decision for themselves. And then we started doing these reels on Instagram, where we're pretending we're answering a customer service phone call with questions we've been asked, right? My son only likes video games, or my daughter doesn't want fantasy, but she reads these kinds of books. And so, we try to help people think that through. Laura Dugger: (10:10 - 10:14) So, that's really how we continue. Hayley Morell: (10:15 - 11:09) Sorry. And one more question that we often get because we are book reviewers is, will you review my book? And so, at that point, we do have a process. We encourage people to submit a request. And it could be maybe a book they're curious about and would just like a review from us, or they're an author or a publisher. And so, in that case, we direct them to our review submission form. And like I said before, we are definitely looking for books that are easy to find. That will encourage us to review a book, because while we love books that are like smaller imprints, et cetera, and we do try to provide coverage for that, we also are aware that a lot of our audience only has their library or their school library. And so, we are trying to do books that are easy to find and accessible for our readers. Laura Dugger: (11:10 - 11:40) Okay, that's really helpful to hear what people are writing in and asking you about. And so, hearing the sweet spot from each team member, and then Betsy, how you mentioned people love to know what's right for my family. So, no, this won't fit every situation. But can you give examples of maybe books that the four of you find yourselves recommending quite a bit because they are ones that fit a wide range of people? Betsy Farquhar: (11:41 - 13:39) Of course, we put a ton of recommendations in our book that came out in the fall. And those are sort of our most common recommendations. We have a place on our website called Starred Reviews. And those are the best of the best in our mind of their genre. So, if you're looking for graphic novels, and you see a star on a graphic novel, it's because we think this is an amazing graphic novel. So, that's just a helpful framework, because of course, people are all over the map, right? We're in the midst of whittling down our Book of the Year for this year. And we also have our Reader's Choice Book of the Year. And those books are ones we tend to recommend all the time. So, I'm going to give you just some samples of what are on our Reader's Choice list, because that is a public list. And I can't reveal the 2025 releases we're considering for the other one. But for our Book of the Year for the Reader's Choice this year, we have The Found Boys by S. D. Smith. We've got, I've got them all right here, Olivetti by Allie Millington. There's The Hiding Place: A Graphic Novel and the Watership Down: The Graphic Novel that are both really fun. People have really enjoyed them. We've got the first book in The Dream Keeper Saga by Kathryn L. Butler. That's a Christian fantasy series. We've got Enemies in the Orchard, which is the novel in verse about World War II. One Big Open Sky by Lesa Cline-Ransome, which is another novel in verse about some Black pioneers going west on a wagon train. And that might be, oh, The Puppets of Spelhorst by Kate DiCamillo. Kate DiCamillo is a super prolific author, and we do recommend her books often. Her book, Ferris, was our Book of the Year last year. So, there's just a quick sampling of some middle grades' books. And middle grades, for people who don't know, that's the broad fourth through eighth grade age range. You think of like ages 8 to 12. And they tend to be the broadest in audience. You can usually read those aloud to a younger audience, or even teenagers might find them enjoyable. So, that's a good start. Hayley Morell: (13:40 - 14:29) I do think one of the beauties of our team is that we've worked together for a long time. And we trust our team. And so, I will happily recommend a book that I haven't seen, but I know Betsy loved and reviewed. And it's so fun reading the same books. So, like right now, since we're on award committees, we are seeing a lot of the same books and getting to talk about them. But I think it's one of our strengths that we each bring something to the table. And I would say if someone really likes history, I'm going to look at what Janie has loved recently, because I know she is looking for those good new history books. And its so fun recommending books and getting to play to our strengths. Laura Dugger: (14:31 - 16:16) And that comes out in book recommendations. When you're passionate about what you're reading, it's naturally contagious, I think. And now a brief message from our sponsor. Sam Leman Chevrolet Eureka has been owned and operated by the Bertschi family for over 25 years. A lot has changed in the car business since Sam and Stephen's grandfather, Sam Leman, opened his first Chevrolet dealership over 55 years ago. If you visit their dealership today, though, you'll find that not everything has changed. They still operate their dealership like their grandfather did, with honesty and integrity. Sam and Stephen understand that you have many different choices in where you buy or service your vehicle. This is why they do everything they can to make the car buying process as easy and hassle-free as possible. They are thankful for the many lasting friendships that began with a simple welcome to Sam Leman's. Their customers keep coming back because they experience something different. I've known Sam and Stephen and their wives my entire life, and I can vouch for their character and integrity, which makes it easy to highly recommend you check them out today. Your car buying process doesn't have to be something you dread, so come see for yourself at Sam Leman Chevrolet in Eureka. Sam and Stephen would love to see you, and they appreciate your business. Learn more at their website, LemanEureka.com or visit them on Facebook by searching for Sam Leman Eureka. You can also call them on 309-467-2351. Thanks for your sponsorship. I'm curious, over the years, what character qualities have you noticed in people who are now adults, but they originally fell in love with reading in childhood? Betsy Farquhar: (16:17 - 17:39) So, that's a pretty broad question. I would think, I'm just going to paint this with broad strokes. People who read typically are people who think, and especially in a day and age where we're bombarded with screens and soundbites all the time, if somebody can actually read an analog book from start to finish, then typically they're going to be able to think about ideas in a different way than people who are just existing on soundbites. So, the ability to think is pretty critical. There's been a lot of studies that show that people who read also have better empathy. It's just a way we can sort of step into somebody else's shoes, especially if we're reading a story about somebody who perhaps lived in a different time period, or they're from a different ethnic background, or even if there's just a different socioeconomic level, it helps us understand the people on the other side a little bit better. So, that kind of, this twin characteristics of empathy and thoughtfulness, I think are pretty common. We all go through seasons where we don't read as much, whether we're stressed or perhaps, my kids are in college and they were avid readers in high school, and they're not doing a lot of reading for fun right now, but they know how to read and they enjoy it. So, they'll probably come back to that in the future. So, I think that's a helpful thing to remember, just because your eight-year-old loves reading, when he or she is 18, they may not be reading as much, and that's okay. They'll probably come back to it. Hayley Morell: (17:40 - 17:53) And I've definitely seen that with younger siblings too, burning out and then all of a sudden back, asking for book recommendations. And it's fun to know that reading habits stick around. Laura Dugger: (17:55 - 18:38) That's well said. And yet, even if they lie dormant for a while, they may be reawakened in adulthood. But I think I find it's less common for someone to fall in love with reading for their first time as an adult. So, I think it's very beneficial as parents to cultivate or instill this love of reading in our children. And you two are the experts. So, I'd love to hear your take on this. What are some of the benefits of reading? And why is it worthwhile to devote our time to curating a healthy diet of books, both for ourselves, but especially for our children? Hayley Morell: (18:39 - 20:06) Betsy, I think you might've said this once, but I think it came up as we were talking about writing our book. As I have a small child who's just starting to notice pages and we're reading board books and he's trying to reach for it. I remember someone once said that reading to a very young child, they're not registering the story yet. They might be registering the pictures. But the time that we're taking reading, when I read to him or when my husband gets home from work and they read one board book together, he's not really looking at the book as much as he's looking at our face and hearing our voice. And books are becoming something that we do together and that we do as a family. And it's a way that we're building relationships. And I think that's a great encouragement to me to keep reading. And I have nieces and nephews who loved books. And then that's something that we enjoy the story together and we'll laugh over silly stories and we'll read. But I think that it's something that as we want to like curate our collections but also think about how are we encouraging children to love reading. It's if they see us reading too and see us enjoying books and still picking up a book ourselves. I'm not sure, Betsy, if you have anything that you would add to that. Betsy Farquhar: (20:07 - 20:41) Well, I just think the better we read anything, the better equipped we are to read the story in the Bible because God revealed himself to us in a written book. And so, we're sort of flexing those muscles when we read. And the more we can engage with what we read, even if it's a picture book with a five-year-old, we're beginning that practice of developing discernment. And that's part of discipling our children. So, I do think it's all part of the same picture. It's not going to look the same for every family but just working on developing those muscles of discernment and reading intelligently, that's going to go a long way. Laura Dugger: (20:43 - 22:07) I love how you bring in the Bible that is so important. And I found myself even just this week at bedtime praying over our daughters that they would have a love for the written word because that is what God has gifted to us. And I love how the word became flesh and dwelt among us, but he is the original storyteller and has instilled that in each of us. And I think just a very practical way at any age to help our children cultivate this love is by reading aloud. And we recently were on a family vacation and had a rental vehicle and we had a long drive-in front of us and listened to the radio for a while. But we also like this tradition of reading one book aloud on a vacation. So, we remember our time in Florida from one year was a place to hang the moon and it was a different book this year, but I get car sick while we're driving. So, I couldn't read it aloud. So, our oldest daughter read it aloud for all of us. And I realized how much attention and focus is required and imagination to paint these pictures of the characters in your mind. And I just thought, wow, there's so much learning that's going on even as the one listening to the book, not reading the actual words. Betsy Farquhar: (22:09 - 22:15) And a place to hang the moon was our reader's choice favorite last year. So, lots of our readers have read that one. Laura Dugger: (22:16 - 22:36) It's such a good one. And as wonderful as books are, they're also powerful and influential. So, as you've reiterated, discernment is required. And I'd love for you to elaborate on why the young adult, or the YA category can be the most controversial. Hayley Morell: (22:38 - 25:12) Young adult protagonists are often upper teenage years. And so, we like to say, as we mentioned in our book, no topic is out of bounds. And this means that there can be a lot going on and a lot of messiness. We like to use that word as we're talking about that. And sometimes the messiness can be thought provoking. Sometimes it can be provocative. And we have noticed often YA deals with questions of identity. Who am I? How do I relate to the world? And that can look like lots of different things. It can include sexual identity, which can lead to a lot of conversations. But something that we like to lean into as we look at the YA genre is that in a world where everything is constantly shifting, as you have a teen and they're encountering conversations at school, conversations with peers, or using social media, having an ever-changing feed that I can look at my Instagram feed and it's going to look nothing like a teenager's Instagram feed. Even if you're looking at the same account, the way that reels are coming, they're getting bombarded with messages. The messiest of books is static. And you both can look at that and read the cover, read what's going on, and talk about it. And you both have the same place to have a conversation. And so, we like to lean into that when we're looking at YA books and realize they are powerful, but they're powerful conversation starters. And books like, Betsy recently read a book, and it's called Bright Red Fruit. And it's a cautionary tale about a teenage girl who has a relationship with an older man that's predator. And he is taking advantage, trying to separate her that is an excellent conversation starter. It's not an easy book to read. You're reading it, getting worried for this girl, but it's a great way to say, let's read this book and let's talk about what a healthy relationship looks like, because this is not healthy. So, we love YA books that can provoke conversations. And sometimes it might be you both looking at a book and going, you know, this doesn't seem helpful. We don't need to finish this book. It's okay to stop reading a book and return it to the library. Laura Dugger: (25:12 - 26:11) I completely agree. And even with that YA section, one of our daughters was just saying, when I go through that section of the library, it seems like every single book is about death. And it did provoke a good conversation from that. But I think it was Sarah McKenzie who was the first person that I heard explain the difference between a middle grade novel or YA because from my understanding, middle grade isn't just for those grades. You even said younger ages can enjoy that and older. I have friends that only read middle grade novel now as adults. So, it's not just your reading level, but YA has different rules on it where I think you said anything goes, any topic is allowed. So, it doesn't mean that YA is necessarily what you have to graduate to once you enter high school. Is that right? Hayley Morell: (26:11 - 27:06) But yes, it's typically and the funny thing that you kind of leaned into it, some middle grade books definitely deal with coming of age or might even have a teenage protagonist, but it's written in a way that a 12 year old could read it and enjoy it. When you get into like the higher YA, it is more like young adults, people starting their own lives, having adventures, leaving home, going on quests. And like you said, bringing in some heavier topics. Now we have seen since like in the last five years, a lot of books dealing with death and grieving that are hitting that middle grade genre too, which can be helpful. But at the same time, if you're just reading sad books, you might want to change your diet and find a fun, happy book too. Laura Dugger: (27:07 - 27:31) Again, in a conversation like this, it has to be more general of a recommendation, but there's such a difference, I'm sure in YA for your 13-year-old versus your 18-year-old. So, for someone who does want to dip their toe into some YA books, do you have anyones that you find yourselves recommending again for that age group? Betsy Farquhar: (27:32 - 28:42) I'll jump in here. We've got a couple of book lists on our site that are, have actual number ages attached to them. Thirteen books for 13-year-old boys is a great one for that younger teen audience. But those tend to be, they're grappling with some coming-of-age issues, but they tend to be more adventure based in a sense and more fun. I think of the Ranger's Apprentice series by John Flanagan. There's a little bit of language. There's a little bit of romance, but it's very teen, young teen friendly. And its actually kind of a good picture of men being heroes and women are heroes in very, like the men are men, they're very masculine. And the women, even if they're part of the army, so to speak, they're still doing it in a feminine way. So, it's just kind of a nice sort of entry into some of those conversations. But then if you fast forward, by the time teens are in their upper teens, they should be able to read adult books too. And so, you might find yourself reading something like Peace Like a River by Leif Enger, which is very much written for an adult market, but very accessible to teens if they're willing to grapple with some of those ideas. But that book's going to be a lot heavier than a book for a 13-year-old. Laura Dugger: (28:44 - 29:05) That's helpful just to have examples. And I think it's also helpful to put this into context by reflecting back through time. So, just in America, what have you learned about the trends and the changes in libraries, specifically over the past 75 years? Betsy Farquhar: (29:06 - 31:30) So, I have a library degree too, so I love talking about libraries. In library science, we have a rule, it's called Ranganathan's Law, and it simply says every book is reader, which means that for every book out there, there's a reader out there. And libraries take that very seriously. No book is off the table for a public library. We had an entire class on serving our community. So, the goal behind a public library has always been to serve the community in which it's placed. Now that's changed a lot as our society has changed a lot. So, before World War II, most libraries were funded very locally, local taxes, they may have even been subscription-based, but after we have all these army vets coming back after World War II, they're going back to school later. We have this explosion of information access for people who can't get it. So, the Library Services Act was the first one. We've had lots of iterations since then. Now it includes technology. It started with giving federal dollars to rural libraries, and it's continued even to big cities now, but the focus is still on services for people who can't access them as easily. So, free Wi-Fi was a really big one before Wi-Fi was as broad spread. There are services for the blind and for other communities that might not be able to read as easily. So, it's still sort of an information hub, but I think that makes us uncomfortable sometimes as Christians because our society has changed so much that we go into a library now and we're like, I would never read this book to my kid. Well, but your neighbor might, and the public library is not the parent of your child. The public library is serving the whole community. So, go ahead and request them to stock some Christian books. A lot of them will buy the Christian books that you request because they want to serve you. You're part of their community. So, I think we just have to remember that their goal is broader. My goal as a parent is far more niche than my public librarian's goal to serve her community. She's not my enemy. Even if she's picking things for story time that I would never read to my children, it doesn't mean I have to ignore the library. I can love that those are image bearers. I can respectfully bring up my concerns, and I can suggest books and I can build a relationship with this fellow image bearer in my community. It can be a great mission field. So, yes, libraries are continually evolving. That's why they now offer you can even check out sports equipment. They're still trying to provide information and resources for the community. Hayley Morell: (31:32 - 32:01) I just recommended or requested two books that were Christian picture books that aren't in our system. And one of our librarians helped me fill out the form explaining why I wanted them. And I just got a notification yesterday. Both are on hold for me and have been added to our library. So, it's exciting. If you don't ask, you don't know if you're going to get it. I honestly was surprised. I was like, oh, they actually got the books I wanted. Laura Dugger: (32:02 - 32:56) It is so exciting when they do that. I love our local library, and the staff is just wonderful to work with. So, that's great encouragement for us to get to know them by name and have a relationship with them. And just to zero in on that one piece after World War II, I think that's tied to what so many people call is it the golden age of children's literature where some people will say we only read books before a certain year, like mid-1900s. But I love that you guys review even modern books because it's not that it was all better back then. But I do think there's a piece of truth in it that libraries had to be so discerning back then with less funding. And so maybe they had the best of the best available and then funds came in and we can have a wider range. Betsy Farquhar: (32:56 - 33:40) There's so many factors here historically because we could really nerd out, but I won't. But what's also being reflected is simply printmaking technology because the ability to print paperbacks, paperbacks as like a thing weren't a thing until the 20th century. So, books were incredibly expensive. You've got all those factors playing in too. So, not only are they getting different funding, but there is an explosion in printmaking technology that allows publishers to produce inexpensive books. And that allows families and libraries to buy more books. It's not dissimilar to the way we have digital media now that's got its own sort of technology behind the distribution of the digital books. So, there's a lot of factors involved in that. Laura Dugger: (33:41 - 34:03) That is fascinating. I'm glad you brought that up. And like I said, so helpful to look back. But now if we're also looking forward, I'd really appreciate your perspective on where we're headed. So, what's on your radar for genres or books that may require even more discernment in the future? Hayley Morell: (34:04 - 37:18) So, right now, romanticy is having a moment and that's a genre that is getting a lot of attention. There's a lot of marketing using that language. And I think it's really helpful to realize this is a marketing term. So, Fourth Wing became very popular. That is a book that is for adults. It has a lot of explicit sex. But it used the term romanticy and it sold very well. And so suddenly all books that are fantasy and have some romance are being called romanticy. And that could mean a lot of different things. So, what we're seeing is this term that if it's used in the YA genre, we don't know what it means going into a book. It might mean a lot of focus on romance and some unhelpful sex. It also could mean a really fun fantasy that happens to have a romantic angle. So, I recently gave a starred review to A Forgery of Fate by Elizabeth Lim. That's a Chinese fairy tale, beauty and the beast type story. And it is excellent. One of the marketing terms that used was romanticy. And it just is a wonderful fantasy story that has this thread of romance perfectly appropriate for teen readers. But that is a term that we're currently aware of. And this is a genre that we want to notice and take with a grain of salt. It's kind of a contrast on the other side. It's differentiating between romanticy has romance and then there's cozy fantasy, which is more cottage core, comfortable feeling. It also could have sex. So, there's, as we run into this fantasy genre, there's a lot of things going on, but it's definitely having a moment. And it's just nice to know what's going on and what cozy fantasy is going to be focused on character development, like very like a shopkeeper who inherits a cottage with a garden and grows mushrooms. That's cozy fantasy. Romanticy is a chosen one motif who's at some dramatic school. Dark academia is also having a moment where it's a lot of angst, a lot of little bit of horror. And some of it can be done really well because it's popular. There's a lot of it out there. And so, some discernment is required as you're figuring out, is this a book for adults or is this a book for teens? I think I would be cautious with books that are being marketed for adults as romanticy because you could run into some things that are meant for an adult audience and might not be helpful for that teenage reader of yours. Betsy Farquhar: (37:18 - 38:06) The only other thing I'll add, and this is sort of a different approach, but we're seeing a lot of genre blending. It's getting harder to say this is a mystery or this is a fantasy, even this is a historical fiction story. So, I think genre fiction in general is kind of having a moment. And when we say genre fiction, we really mean things like mystery, science fiction, romanticy, these sort of sub genres that are underneath the broader terms of realistic fiction or speculative fiction is an umbrella term that includes fantasy, dystopia, science fiction, magical realism, all the little niche downstream sort of sub genres. But we're seeing some really interesting things. It's going to be harder to automatically decide I like that genre, or I don't because they're just mixing and matching elements from all over the place. Laura Dugger: (38:08 - 39:15) Mm-hmm. That is helpful. I had never heard of some of those things that you just mentioned, but also I'd love for you to respond after I shared this story. I had a previous guest, Megan Cabe, who used to run a blog. It was called Young Book Love and she would review, I think, middle grade novels, maybe a little bit of YA, but she would say most topics are beneficial to read, even if they're difficult, what you all refer to as messy books. But she did provide extra caution and just said she strongly advised against explicit sexual content because those mental images have a way of sticking with us. And I agree with her. I would also add sometimes what's not appropriate for our children is not appropriate for us either. And just a funny way to remember this, I had a loved one recently who just said, “You can't sugarcoat a turd. I'd love your take on all of that.” Hayley Morell: (39:17 - 41:54) So, we like to use the term beyond ever after when we're dealing with this idea of what romance is helpful, what is not helpful. And like you said, the age of the reader comes into play because something that might be a good conversation point with your teen, let's say dealing with a first kiss, that is something that is good to be thinking about and be talking about having healthy conversations about what is God's design for sexuality. And as you are starting to notice the opposite sex and have feelings, what do we do with those? And again and again, it's been shown that it is helpful to have these conversations because if we're not having a conversation about what is God's view and what does God want us to do with this, our young people are going to turn to the world, which is very happy to give them a lot of talk about sexuality, but some very different perspectives and answers that are focused on yourself, let's you do you versus no, what has God given us and how are we going to steward this? So, one of the things that I like to, that we like to be aware of as we're reviewing at Redeemed Reader is, is this a 12-year-old reading this book? And if a 12-year-old is reading a book and in the book, a 12-year-old is having a crush and it's kissing, we don't want our 12-year-olds kissing. That's not that helpful yet. I mean, that's, that's quite young and yes, in some cultures you might, but not yet. However, if this is a book about an 18-year-old on a high school trip, like Becky Dean has some really fun YA romances that are appropriate for teens, then dealing with what is it like dating? What is it like dealing with these emotions and chemistry that can be really well done for an 18-year-old? But like you said, we want to be aware of our imaginations. We want to be aware of what we're able to handle. And for someone, maybe reading those romances is fun and helpful. For another, it might be unhelpful. And I think that comes down to as a reader growing discernment and knowing what you are able to read that will still be edifying. Betsy Farquhar: (41:56 - 42:55) I'm going to piggyback a little bit. I, I agree that there, we look to scripture for what the standards are, and the Bible is not describing sexual activity in sordid detail. So, it's probably a good idea for us not to be wallowing in the same sorts of things. And I think the same thing is true for language. In fact, it's easier to ignore profanity in a book you're reading versus listening to it. I mean, if we immerse ourselves in audio books that have, that are littered with profanity, it's going to stick in our head differently than if we're just reading it on the page. And I think sexual activity; there are some similar dynamics at play. Obviously, a visual scene is going to be probably stick with us even more than a written scene. But either way, you know, that's part of discernment is what is my imagination doing with this? And the overall picture of my reading diet. Is this all I'm reading? Is this what my thoughts are going towards? Are they pointing me back to Christ? Are they promoting some helpful conversation? Or is it just sort of my guilty pleasure? Well, that should be maybe a sign. Laura Dugger: (43:21 - 43:45) Some love stories are described as squeaky clean. But when it comes to the world of Christian romance, what are some helpful questions that we can be asking our tween or teen? And what are some healthy considerations for filtering books that we're going to allow to be consumed in our home? Hayley Morell: (43:47 - 47:15) So, it's interesting. I think each genre of romance can have its own pitfalls. And I know I really appreciate the authors who are writing clean, squeaky-clean stories. And as I've read them and consumed them, one of the things I've noticed is that it is clean. There's no question of something being clean. But at the same time, if the only thing we're reading, going back to having a balanced book diet, is a squeaky-clean story, I don't think that's helpful because it doesn't show an accurate view of the world. And we want to be preparing our tweens and teens for a world where, yes, there is a happily ever after. Yes, we have the fairy tale wedding, or we have an imagination that is sparked by boy meets girl. But then what happens next? And we live in a fallen world. And so, we have to work on relationships. We have to work on communicating. And sometimes squeaky clean can lean so far into being safe that it doesn't actually show what it is like to have a relationship with the opposite sex. I think of one story I read and it's very superficial, playful. Snarky is often something I've noticed in the squeaky clean because we don't, we have to have some form of banter. And so, it's perpetual sarcasm and no physical touch. But then suddenly our protagonists marry and now they're still being snarky and not touching. And as an adult, I look at that and go, that is not an accurate portrayal of what it looks like to have a romance and to have marriage. And so, we love to ask, what are the relationships like in this book? And if that's in a middle grade novel, one of the things we love seeing is are they showing a healthy family? Are they showing parents that like being together? Because that's at a middle grade level is you're sparking that imagination. What is our protagonist seeing as the adults around them are having relationships? Do the adults like to be together? I just was reading a really sweet, Betsy, I think you read it. But Will's Race for Home is a story about this boy and westward expansion. And so, it's when the Oklahoma, Oklahoma land rush opens up. And there's the sweetest time where he talks about how he knows his father loves his mother because his father will look at his mother and she will blush. And it's the sweetest age-appropriate picture of what romance looks like when you're a 12-year-old looking at your parents. And I think that type of thing can be a really healthy way of having these conversations versus having a diet that is just squeaky clean and yet might actually be showing an inaccurate portrayal of what it's like to have relationships in a fallen world. Laura Dugger: (47:16 - 47:30) Well, let's get specific on another type of book as well. How do you advise parents to think critically on what age is appropriate to consume what you mentioned earlier, the Hunger Games or a book like that? Betsy Farquhar: (47:31 - 49:44) Ooh, pick me. I love these kind of books. I'll read anything. And I tend to get tasked with books that are difficult sometimes. Although many of us on our team read them and we do talk about these behind the scenes. So, when you're thinking about the age your child is and when they're ready for any book, but especially a popular one, I think part of that is our job as parents is always to be watching our children, to be students of our children. How are they consuming media in general? What kind of video games? What kind of movies? Are they on social media? What is their media diet like? And how are they handling that? And if they're showing discernment in general, and they're kind of grappling with issues and ideas, then they're going to be ready for a book like the Hunger Games sooner than a child who's just blindly taking it all in. There's no magic age where you say, ooh, you're 12, you can read the Hunger Games. A lot depends on what that child's already displayed. And I think dystopia are the books where there's some apocalyptic future and there's usually an autocratic governor or government system or it's futuresque. But they're really great books about bringing up big questions about how society works and the nature of authority and even the nature of anarchy. And they're just such great discussion starters. But if your child isn't able to have those kinds of conversations yet, they're going to miss the forest for the trees and it's going to be all shock value. But I'm going to add a big caveat. If it's really popular and you think your child is maybe ready, maybe not quite, I would probably go ahead and read it with him or her if all of the peers are reading it. Because I would rather my child have that conversation with me than with their friend. Or at least have it with me first before they read it with their friends. Even if we skip parts, maybe it's a book that you feel like we can't read chapter 12 for whatever reason. Be honest with your child and say, you know what? This book has a scene I'm really uncomfortable with. Maybe give a brief summary. We're going to keep going. But engage with your children over what is popular. I think that is the number one takeaway because they're going to find answers somewhere. We want it to be from us. Laura Dugger: (49:46 - 50:52) That is good. And that's why I appreciate the redeemed reader because you're putting in all this work for us because we can't pre-read everything. But when we're faced with a situation like that, it is helpful that we can choose to read some with them. And another angle, I just love a few of your quotes in the book. First, on page 76, you write, If Genesis were made into a true-to-the-book movie, the Redeemed Reader team would not allow our children to watch it. We might abstain as well. And then you go on for page 111 and you say, the best tool we can give our growing readers is God's word. The more they know and understand the Bible, the better equipped they will be to think discerningly, to recognize error, and to know how the Bible handles the same issues. So, will you just elaborate on this wisdom and advise us on how and why to encourage our children to read the Bible, even though it is messy? Betsy Farquhar: (50:53 - 52:58) Well, it is a messy book, but thankfully, it's not only a messy book. I mean, if it were a movie, we have nudity very quickly. Then we have rebellion against God, and then we have murder. And before you know it, six chapters in, the world is so bad that God is sending a flood to destroy it. So, it must have been really bad. But the Bible isn't giving us all those details. And I think that is a big piece of the picture when it comes to discernment in literature. The Bible is not shy about telling us that people sinned. I mean, our heroes, David, infidelity, murder, you know, most of the famous people in the Bible did something egregiously wrong and sinful. And yet the whole story of the Bible is God redeeming his people. We're all sinners. And there is hope because of Christ. None of us can make it without Christ. And so, in the Bible, you're seeing both the mess and the hope. You're seeing God's answer to this problem. And so, as we read scripture with our kids, one of the things that is helpful is we know what sin is. It's rebellion against God. It includes everything from sexual activity outside of marriage to gossip and pride and sort of the easy sins, right? They're all sin. So, I think that's one thing that comes across when we're studying God's word. We also see Christ. And when we then turn to a book, just a regular fiction book or even a nonfiction book, is the book also labeling sin as sin or at least a mistake? Or is it glorifying it? How is it handling it compared to how we know scripture handles it? Is there any hope in the book? And where is that hope found? Are they just praying to the universe? We're seeing universe capitalized all over the place now as sort of this amorphous deity. Well, that's not hopeful. I don't want to pray to Jupiter. You know, we have a God who cares about us. And so just getting your kids to sort of reckon with the differences between how a book is portraying hope and judgment versus how scripture portrays it, that's going to take them a long way. Laura Dugger: (53:01 - 53:23) That's fantastic. And your book lists at the end of each chapter are reason enough to purchase the book. But I'm sure that you've encountered additional titles since your publication date that you also enjoy. So, will you share a handful of book recommendations, maybe some from each of those sweet spots again from your team? Hayley Morell: (53:24 - 54:03) For young adults, we've actually mentioned both of the ones that I would add. They both have received starred reviews. A Forgery of Fate by Elizabeth Lim. Excellent fantasy for young adults. And then Bright Red Fruit by Sophia O'Heo. And that one is a discussion starter. It is a messy book, but it's an excellent book for its audience. Those would be two young adult fantasies. We see a lot of young adult fantasies. So, but I would have loved to include those in the book. We just read them later. Betsy Farquhar: (54:03 - 55:03) So, quick correction, Bright Red Fruit's not a fantasy, but it is it is. Oh, I apologize. That's fine. It's a discussion starter. And that usually means that there's something in there you need to know about before you read it. As a parent, I would recommend doing your homework on that book. It's a really good book to read with your daughters, but you might want to pre-read it first. Middle grade, that's our biggest bucket. Because it's the most it's got the widest audience reach and it's just so fun. So, some of the ones that we've really liked, The Teacher of Nomadland by Daniel Nayeri. He is a Christian author. He won the National Book Award for this book for young people's literature and a Newbery Honor. It's fantastic. It's a story about World War II. Benny on the Case by Wesley King is a really lovely mystery that features the protagonist has mosaic down syndrome, and it's just not very common to read books with different disabilities represented. So, that's just a really sweet story. Lots of fun. Hayley Morell: (55:04 - 55:05) It's a great audio book too. Betsy Farquhar: (55:06 - 56:40) Yes. Song of the Stone Tiger, another Christian author, Glenn McCarty. It's a kind of a mix of realistic fiction and fantasy. So, it's fun. A new one that we like. And then I'll leave you with one more. I actually have it right here. So, for those who are watching this, they can see it. It's called Radiant by Vonda Michaud-Nelson. And it's a novel in verse, but a beautiful picture of what it means to love your neighbor. So, The Sword by Marty Murkowski from New Growth Press. It's kind of a family devotional resource. It was the World Magazine Book of the Year. We gave it a starred review as well. The Amazing Generation is a book for kids by the same author as The Anxious Generation. So, that book is like a super bestseller for adults. This is kind of taking that idea and helping kids know how not to be the anxious generation, right? How they can be the amazing generation. The World Entire is a nonfiction, maybe technically a picture book, but it's really long. And it's for this audience. And it's a true story about World War II, about a rescue. I think it was set in Portugal. And then a graphic novel that's nonfiction. I'm trying to cover all your different genres here. This is How to Say Goodbye in Cuban by Daniel Meadez. It's about his father and how he emigrated or escaped from Cuba. But it's a graphic novel. So, there's a lot of visual interest. So, that's a really interesting background for kids who are hearing a lot of headlines about places like Cuba. And they're like, what's really going on? A book like that can help them understand just some of the nuance behind the headlines. Hayley Morell: (56:41 - 58:51) One of the things about middle grades as we talk about books is that middle grade is the age where readers are just exploding. And while you might have been able to keep up with your reader, then they hit 10 or 12 years old, and you give them a stack of books and they're reading them and asking for more. So, we definitely have a lot of middle grade reviews. Picture books, though, are another place that we just love. And there's been some recent ones that we looked at and got, oh, this would be so good for the book. Something like Tuesday's Bear by Alexander Davis. It's this beautiful story based on a true historical event. Unclaimed luggage is where, you know, if a suitcase gets lost, what happens to the contents? Well, one family had an idea, and Alexandra tells it through the story of this little bear who gets lost and then is found. It's the most beautiful story. As a Christian, you can see a lot of very true themes running through it. And it's a delight to read aloud. Wild Honey from the Moon by Kenneth Craigel. It's a story about a mother shrew whose little boy is sick, and she is going to do anything, even if it means traveling all the way to the moon to get some wild honey. It's a very imaginative story. Beautiful pictures. A couple sneak peek that are going to just, these reviews are just going up. Iguanodon's Horn by Sean Rubin. We've loved Bolivar, it was a graphic novel he did about a dinosaur. You can tell he likes dinosaurs. This is an amazing nonfiction picture book. And for our Christian readers, this is a book about dinosaurs that doesn't have evolution. And I think you're going to love it. One more. His Grace is Enough. This is like Dr. Zeus type rhyming. Melissa Kruger wrote it. It's a Christian book and it's a wonderful reminder for children. When you are dealing with sin, God's grace is enough. And I think you'll find if you read this, you'll be repeating the stanzas to yourself and encouraged as you read. Laura Dugger: (58:54 - 59:41) I love having book lists. And if any other listeners are like me, we'll finish this episode and go ahead and put a bunch of books on hold at the library, which is always so convenient. And I'm sure a lot of people aren't able to take notes right now. Maybe they're driving or working out as they're listening to this. But I love that every episode on The Savvy Sauce now has a transcript available. So, if anybody wants these book lists, you can go to the show notes page, either on our website or click on your podcast app and the transcript is available there. So, thank you for all those wonderful recommendations. And do you have any other helpful tips to give us as parents if we're trying to navigate this well? Betsy Farquhar: (59:42 - 1:00:26) Yes, start at birth and start not just reading with your kids, but asking them questions. They don't, it doesn't have to be a lengthy discussion. Is Piglet a good friend to poo? You know, if you're reading Winnie the Pooh or if you're an Elephant and Piggy fan, like my kids were. Do you think Gerald should share his ice cream with Piggy? You can just pause in the middle of the story and just get them thinking, right? So then when you get to the Hunger Games, you can say, what did you think of the ending? Would you have liked it to end differently? Those are great open-ended questions that get people talking and engaging and that you're often running. If you can just think, I need to engage with my kids over what we're reading, then almost any book can be a discussion starter. Laura Dugger: (1:00:27 - 1:00:33) Well, where can we go after this conversation to find more of your book recommendations? Betsy Farquhar: (1:00:35 - 1:01:29) I'll do this one. Redeemedreader, alloneword.com is our website. And then we're super creative. Our Facebook is exactly the same. Redeemedreader, alloneword. Our Instagram is redeemed underscore reader. That's kind of a long story. But if you Google Redeemed Reader, you'll find us. And then the best way, oh yes, of course our book, which is also called The Redeemed Reader. We're so original. But the best way to experience Redeemed Reader, other than the book, is through our weekly newsletter, which Haley curates and she does a fantastic job. But there's where you'll get the latest reviews. We put in links for other places around the web that you might find interesting, different bookish news. Haley does a really fun book trivia with picture books. So, we like to think that it's going to make your inbox a happy place. It's not a marketing email. Laura Dugger: (1:01:30 - 1:01:50) I love that. We will provide links to all of that in the show notes for today's episode. And you two are already familiar. We are called The Savvy Sauce because savvy is synonymous with practical knowledge. And so, as my final question for both of you today, what is your savvy sauce? Betsy Farquhar: (1:01:52 - 1:03:03) So, as a business owner and a mom and a wife, it's probably not a surprise that I love my planner, but I've been through a lot of planners in my day, and I have very specific requirements. It needs to be bound, not coil bound. There's a certain size. I mean, I have issues. I should say I have high standards for my planner. The single best feature in my current planner is that it forces me to break down my to do list between my life to do and my work to do. And that was a game changer for me because I am wearing a lot of hats as most women are these days. And so, I limit myself to the number of bullet points that I'm given in the planner so that my work doesn't overtake my family life. It tends to be that way, sadly, more than the other way around. Usually, my family life is not overtaking the work life, but it just it just gives me a chance to articulate each week. You know, I've got a birthday coming up that I need to plan for or I need to make sure my I mean, I graduated my youngest last year from high school, but the senior year in high school has a lot of deadlines. And so, it just helped me prioritize those milestones for my family and not let work get in the way. Love that. Laura Dugger: (1:03:03 - 1:03:04) What's the name of your planner? Betsy Farquhar: (1:03:04 - 1:03:17) It's called the commit 30. I know there are other planners that do the same sort of thing, but I love having a weekly spread and I just love breaking it out between life to do and work to do. Laura Dugger: (1:03:18 - 1:03:20) Absolutely. That sounds amazing. I love it. Hayley Morell: (1:03:21 - 1:05:10) And my savvy sauce, I was going to say, Betsy is the planner and Betsy, I know you wouldn't appreciate this is spiral bound. So, I echo having a planner is a great way for me to just sort through all my thoughts, put them down and organize what needs to get done. But my savvy sauce is related to tech habits. And as we were getting ready for our first, my husband and I were talking about how could we be mindful with our phone usage? And I have to thank Betsy for recommending Andy Crouch's, The Tech-Wise Family. Love that book. And one of the things that we decided to do was to create a charging station downstairs in our house. And when I am not working where I need my phone for authentication or sending a voice message or being on the phone, if I'm not actively working, my phone lives on its charger. And that's been a struggle for me. I have to admit the moment I had a child, anxiety kicked in. And for the first month, the phone was on me because that's what I needed to have a little security blanket. But I've been learning to leave my phone behind. And then I'm not tempted to pick it up and scroll. And I feel like a child again because I get to the middle of the afternoon. And since I haven't been distracting myself, I've been getting things done. And all of a sudden I'm like; it's two o'clock and it's not dinner time yet. I have all of this time because I've created some more time by using the phone as a tool. But not having it right present and honestly, just distracting myself with it. Laura Dugger: (1:05:12 - 1:05:48) That is a good, savvy tip. I love both of those. And you two have such warm and engaging personalities. And I love those benefits that you were talking about for people who are readers. I experienced all of that through both of you today. And you're so wise and discerning yourselves. And I am just beyond grateful that the Lord gifted you with your intellect, but also this passion for reviewing these resources. You're benefiting so many parents and children alike. So, thank you for the work that you do. And thank you for being my guests. Betsy Farquhar: (1:05:49 - 1:05:57) Thank you for having us. It is all from the Lord. Anything we have that's wise and worth taking away. The credit should go to him, of course. Hayley Morell: (1:05:58 - 1:06:00) Ame
This week on Barrel to Bottle, we're showing Central Illinois some love. We asked our Central Illinois stores (Peoria, Springfield, Champaign and Bloomington) to bring their favorite local beers to Dan, who muled them back to Chicago. Analytical Brewing Kolngeist Triptych Chip It on the Green Triptych Dank Meme White Oak Rippin' Lips Riggs Hefeweizen Riggs Black IPL Hand of Fate Double Bean Dream Cream Ale Keg Grove Brewing Holey Jeans Destihl Deadhead TourBus Double Dry Hopped Hazy IPA Destihl ILL-IPA If you have a question for the Barrel to Bottle Crew, email us at comments@binnys.com, or reach out to us on Facebook, Twitter or Instagram. If we answer your question during a podcast, you'll get a $20 Binny's Gift Card! If you like our podcast, subscribe wherever you download podcasts. Rate and review us on Apple Podcasts.
Travels With Randy Route 66 Episode 16 is here! And We End At The Beginning! Illinois - Springfield To Navy Pier Route 66 Historical Sites Tour Randy shared his experiences visiting historical sites along Route 66 in Illinois, including a tour of Ace Sign Company in Springfield, a business spanning six generations, and Funk's Grove, a maple syrup farm operating for five generations. He discussed the unique presence of giant roadside statues in Illinois, particularly noting the state's fondness for large human figures. The conversation also included a brief exchange with Beth about the prevalence of city names like Atlanta across different states. AI Voice Assistant Capabilities Discussion The discussion focused on two main topics. First, they discussed the common town name "Riverside" and how it appears in nearly every U.S. state, though not quite every state. Second, they explored the capabilities of an AI voice assistant named Beth, who was able to provide instant, relevant responses to questions about van travel and Route 66. The conversation concluded with an observation about increased traffic and international visitors on Route 66, though the speakers noted this might represent different levels of "picking up" for them versus local experts. Central Illinois Childhood Experiences Bubba discussed his experiences growing up in Central Illinois, particularly around towns like Decatur and Warrensburg. They talked about the weather in the region, with Bubba sharing his experiences of harsh winters and pleasant summers. Randy shared an interesting find during a photography trip along Route 66, discovering a junkyard artist creating sculptures from heavy equipment. The conversation concluded with a discussion about photography as art, with Randy expressing his perspective on capturing existing art rather than creating it himself. Academic Achievements and Energy Discussion Bubba and Randy discussed Bubba's son's academic achievements and potential college tuition assistance. They then conversed about the prevalence of windmills in central Illinois, comparing them to solar farms and discussing the challenges of wind energy. The conversation concluded with a discussion about the different areas of Chicago and its suburbs, particularly focusing on Route 66's path through the region. Route 66 Murals Discovery Randy shared his experience visiting Pontiac, Illinois, where he discovered a series of murals created by the Wall Dogs artist group in 2009. He discussed a particularly impressive Route 66 mural featuring cars from different eras and a futuristic vision, as well as learning about Bob Waldmire, an artist who traveled Route 66 and lived in a van before passing away in 2009. The conversation concluded with Randy receiving encouraging feedback from Beth about his own travels and photography along Route 66. Route 66 Travel in Illinois Randy and Bubba discussed their Route 66 travel experiences in Illinois, particularly around Wilmington and Joliet. Randy explained how different Route 66 alignments exist in Illinois, with the state doing a good job of marking the correct route with regular signage, especially along business routes. They noted that Illinois maintains the route well, unlike some other states where signage can be inconsistent or confusing. Route 66 Travel Experience Discussion Randy shared his experience traveling Route 66, highlighting Illinois's improved signage system and the recent change in Chicago's ceremonial starting point to Navy Pier. He discussed the logistics of visiting the new starting point, noting parking challenges for larger vehicles. Randy recommended allowing two days per state for the journey, suggesting early morning drives and considering the timing for viewing neon signs. Route 66 Travel Experiences Randy shared his experiences traveling Route 66 across 8 states, noting that Kansas stood out to him due to its small size and strong commitment to the route, while Texas was his least favorite section due to poor signage and lack of engagement from local authorities. He praised Oklahoma, Missouri, and Illinois for their effective signage and town participation, and highlighted New Mexico's unique historical route through the Santa Fe Loop. Randy expressed hope that the upcoming Route 66 Centennial celebrations would encourage more people to experience the historic route, particularly families taking summer road trips. Route 66 Project Planning Meeting Randy and Bubba discussed their new Route 66 project, including a 16-month calendar and a 10-pack of postcards featuring photos from the route. The calendar will go to production in June and be ready for shipping in July, with a website launch planned for Sunday. They are also working on establishing two locations per state where the calendar and postcards can be purchased. Bubba will handle storage and shipping through his book business, and they plan to continue posting photos on their Facebook page and potentially start new photo series in the future. SO. MANY. PHOTOS - Come join the conversation on Facebook with our 33,000 friends! https://www.facebook.com/travelswithrandypodcast Have a great idea for the guys? Want to sponsor us? Want us to sell something National Park or Route 66 related? Want to be a guest? Want to pay for both of us to go to Alaska? Want me to stop asking questions? bubba@travelswithrandypodcast.com !!
On this week's episode of Out and About, Dr. Mae Gilliland of ArtsPartners of Central Illinois talks with social realist painter Robert Ketchens about his current exhibition at the Contemporary Art Center of Peoria. On view through June 20 in Gallery 3R, Ketchens' work uses bold color and symbolism to explore the complexities of the African diaspora and themes of dignity, memory, and humanity. The exhibition will culminate in the CAC's Juneteenth Celebration, where Ketchens will speak about his work, with a combined art reception on May 16.
Discovering Your BEST Colors and Style Upgrades for Your Closet and Home with Color and Style Consultant, Carla Gasser (Episode 292) Romans 12:2 NLT “Don't copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will learn to know God's will for you, which is good and pleasing and perfect.” *Transcription Below* Carla Gasser is a Christian author, speaker, and certified color/style consultant known for helping women connect faith with everyday life, focusing on spiritual and inner beauty through decluttering the soul. Based in Ohio, she's the author of The Beauty of an Uncluttered Soul, speaks at women's events, teaches Bible studies, and offers personal style guidance, encouraging authenticity and grace in messy, real-life situations. Carla's Website Thank You to Our Sponsor: The Sue Neihouser Team Questions and Topics We Cover: Will you walk us through exactly what you do during a color analysis? What are your best tips for: Make-up, jewelry color, print options, and general styling tips? Now that we have this information, how can we begin to edit and curate our closet? Other Savvy Sauce Episode Mentioned: 134 Fashion Meets Faith with Shari Braendel 251 Wintering and Embracing Holy Hygge with Jamie Erickson Connect with The Savvy Sauce on Facebook or Instagram or Our Website Gospel Scripture: (all NIV) Romans 3:23 “for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God,” Romans 3:24 “and are justified freely by his grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus.” Romans 3:25 (a) “God presented him as a sacrifice of atonement, through faith in his blood.” Hebrews 9:22 (b) “without the shedding of blood there is no forgiveness.” Romans 5:8 “But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” Romans 5:11 “Not only is this so, but we also rejoice in God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have now received reconciliation.” John 3:16 “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.” Romans 10:9 “That if you confess with your mouth, “Jesus is Lord,” and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved.” Luke 15:10 says “In the same way, I tell you, there is rejoicing in the presence of the angels of God over one sinner who repents.” Romans 8:1 “Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus” Ephesians 1:13–14 “And you also were included in Christ when you heard the word of truth, the gospel of your salvation. Having believed, you were marked in him with a seal, the promised Holy Spirit, who is a deposit guaranteeing our inheritance until the redemption of those who are God's possession- to the praise of his glory.” Ephesians 1:15–23 “For this reason, ever since I heard about your faith in the Lord Jesus and your love for all the saints, I have not stopped giving thanks for you, remembering you in my prayers. I keep asking that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the glorious Father, may give you the spirit of wisdom and revelation, so that you may know him better. I pray also that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you, the riches of his glorious inheritance in the saints, and his incomparably great power for us who believe. That power is like the working of his mighty strength, which he exerted in Christ when he raised him from the dead and seated him at his right hand in the heavenly realms, far above all rule and authority, power and dominion, and every title that can be given, not only in the present age but also in the one to come. And God placed all things under his feet and appointed him to be head over everything for the church, which is his body, the fullness of him who fills everything in every way.” Ephesians 2:8–10 “For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith – and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God – not by works, so that no one can boast. For we are God‘s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.“ Ephesians 2:13 “But now in Christ Jesus you who once were far away have been brought near through the blood of Christ.“ Philippians 1:6 “being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.” *Transcription* Music: (0:00 – 0:12) Laura Dugger: (0:12 - 1:47) Welcome to the Savvy Sauce, where we have practical chats for intentional living. I'm your host, Laura Dugger, and I'm so glad you're here. Thank you to the Sue Neihouser team for sponsoring this episode. If you're looking to buy or sell a home this season, make sure you reach out to Sue at 309-229-8831. Sue would love to walk alongside you as you unlock new doors. Carla Gasser is my guest today. Not only is she a color and style consultant, but she's also an author and a Bible teacher. We're going to discuss some very practical ways that you can discover what colors are uniquely best for you and then learn also how you can incorporate those into your closet and into your home. I have been wanting to do an episode like this for such a long time. During undergrad, I was able to minor in fashion merchandising and even got to study abroad in Europe with a group of about 50 people. It was so exhilarating, and I've just always been drawn to topics like this one. In addition, what excites me about today is the way that Carla will talk about beauty both inside and out. I can't wait to share this conversation with you. Here's our chat. Welcome to the Savvy Sauce, Carla. Carla Gasser: (1:48 - 1:51) So, great to be with you today, Laura. Thanks for inviting me. Laura Dugger: (1:51 - 1:59) Well, I am just absolutely fascinated by your work. So, can you explain a little bit more of what you get to do? Carla Gasser: (1:59 - 3:36) Sure. If we're talking about the outer beauty part of my business, I was trained as a certified color analysis and style consultant by Sheri Brandel, who's the owner, founder, and CEO of Style by Color. What I love most about that training is that we're independent contractors. So, I was able to take that certification and everything I knew and already incorporated it into what my ministry was. My ministry for the past 20 years is talking about how God makes us beautiful from the inside out. But I've always had this struggle because I've loved fashion, and I've loved dressing, and I've loved outer beauty as well, which is something that God created, right? So, a couple of years ago after I did the certification, I kind of incorporated it, and it was easier than I thought because God is the author of beauty. God is beauty. So, because I'm a Bible study teacher and I love digging into God's word, I just focused more on that. And my book and my Bible study is called The Beauty of an Uncluttered Soul. So, those two things just ended up meshing beautifully for me. And it also helped me reach out to a wider audience, women who are interested about outer beauty and fashion and style and color and design, but they're looking for something more, and I could provide that for them too. So, it's been wonderful. I mean, I've really enjoyed it. Laura Dugger: (3:36 - 3:51) Well, it's such a unique pairing. And I think, is there anything you'd want to elaborate on for us as believers, as Christians? Why does it matter, both internal and external beauty? Right. Carla Gasser: (3:51 - 6:00) I'm speaking about this next week, and I've been starting to incorporate this in when I speak because the world has distorted beauty, right? And they have hijacked it, and they have made it into something that God never designed it to be. But if we look at the other side of it, the church, I feel, sometimes has over-spiritualized inner beauty to the exclusion of outer beauty. So, I was caught in that tension, and I think many believing women are, well, outer beauty is shallow, inner beauty is spiritual, right? And I say it's not either or, it's and both, right? That if God created the sunsets, and all the beautiful flowers, and the things that make us post these images on Instagram of his natural beauty, then God cares about beauty. And I love it when it says he created them in Genesis, and it was very good. The only time he uses very good is when he's talking about humans, man and woman. He created them very good. If you go back to the Hebrew word of very good, it's tov, and it means beautiful. So, when I speak to women, I say, we are going to stop right now, and we are going to say, I was created beautiful. And a lot of women don't say that, can't say that, are afraid to say that. And I'm here to say yes, and it's okay to express that. And I don't stand up there saying, you have to look like me, or dress like me. I want you to discover your unique style, your unique beauty. You know, it's not a one size fits all. It's not like, well, this is the trend, so you've got to wear it. I don't want to put any more pressure on women. I want to free women to embrace their God-given beauty, if that makes sense. Laura Dugger: (6:01 - 6:12) Absolutely. Well, and one of the ways you do that is through color analysis, but can you walk us through like exactly what you do during a color analysis meeting? Carla Gasser: (6:12 - 13:55) Color analysis is having a moment, isn't it? And what I'm finding is either if you're my age or older, and I'm in my late fifties, you remember seasonal color analysis, right? And when I start talking color analysis, those women will say to me, well, in the eighties, I was a winter, I was a spring, I was a summer, right? And what am I now? And then if you talk to my daughter's generation, like twenties and thirties, they're hearing seasonal color analysis come back to, but they're watching it on Instagram and TikTok. And they're like, well, I'm a cool summer. I'm a neutral winter. And I'm like, what is going on? This is confusing. So, Sherry Brandel, like I said, the owner and founder of Style by Color was one of the first people who was trained in Color Me Beautiful, the seasonal color system. So, she knows it inside and out. And what she decided to do was to take the tenets, the basics of the seasonal color system, but expand it. So, we don't, you're not going to walk out of a color analysis telling people you're a winter. We have six unique codes, and our codes are more illustrative of what you are. So, I'm a clear, okay? There's warm, there's soft, there's cool, there's deep, and there's light. And what we're doing, and I can show a cute little chart here that helps, what we're doing is we're basing it on the seasonal color system, but we're actually giving you more colors. Because what we're doing when I say you're a soft, I am taking the softer colors, palettes, tones, and hues of summer and fall and giving them to you. So, the other thing that we do that other systems don't do, we take into account your hair. In many of these systems or color analysis appointments, you'll see them put a white cap over a woman's head and just look at her face. We're like, what? Your hair has so much to do with your overall coloring. I mean, I know it's hard for you to do this but imagine me platinum blonde. Wouldn't I look totally different if I was platinum blonde and this very dark hair I have? So, we take into account your hair color. And what we're doing is we're doing tonal color analysis, meaning I am looking at your major color dominant characteristics. Like I just said, your hair color, your eye color, your skin tone. And now I'm not trying to determine whether you're cool or warm or neutral. That got the Color Me Beautiful system into like 24 color codes because they took every season and they broke it down like six ways and it became complicated and crazy. What we're doing is I'm comparing my skin tone to my hair to my eyes. And we give you a rating of one to five, meaning, and it's really good if we're both on camera here, people are going to see this right away. I'm a five. I am the highest contrast level. Can we know why? I've got really dark hair and really light skin and light eyes. So, I'm a five. Now we look at you. You're not a five. You are a lower contrast level because your hair and your skin tone when you turn are pretty similar. And your eyes kind of are in the middle there. So, I would put you at a three or a two. And that contrast level helps me determine your color code. Not only that, it helps me determine what prints and patterns you should wear, what jewelry you should wear. I mean, what makeup you should wear? So, that is how we differ. And I feel that learning the tonal part of this and understanding contrast level was a game changer for me. And that's what I teach my clients. That once you know that it's easy for me to put you in a color code. I also use these capes behind me that help during a color analysis. But I also do things like I, you know, use patterns. You know, this is a high contrast level pattern. So, this is going to look good on someone like me, black and white. If I put a black and white on you, you're going to look like a floating head. It's not cohesive. But what you're going to look better in is something like this because this is medium contrast. Okay, so we do that. We also talk about pop colors. Everybody, you know, will say, well, don't take red away from me. Red's my favorite color. Don't take blue away from me. I wear blue all the time. I'm like, I'm not taking hardly any colors away from you. What I'm teaching you is when you go into a store and you want to know what red, well, my red and your red are very different, right? So, I'm not taking red away from you. I'm just trying to guide you towards the right red. I'm not taking pink away from you. Oh, one color code I do. Pink away from you. I'm just telling you, you know, I need this pink. This is my pink, right? That's my yellow. So, that's what we do. We break it all down. When I do mini color analysis, I'm usually in a boutique and I love working with boutique owners because then I can help people shop right after. But it's a 15-minute quick appointment. I give you digital downloads of your colors. Like I said, every color codes gets 35 plus colors. And if you have them on your phone, when you're out shopping, you're scrolling and going, oh, I can use this. Oh, I can use this. Not only in our digital collection, we give you the trending colors twice a year for fall and winter and spring and summer. Because we both know that colors, you know, have moments, right? Pantone picks their color of the year, which happens to be white this year, which I'm like, that's a little counterintuitive because I don't know that white's a color, but anyways, it's a neutral. So, you have them on your phone and then you can decide and they update. I also have color cards for old school people like me that want the physical representation, and we sell those as well. And you can put those in your purse, and you can use them. But I tell people, use them for your nail color, use them for your makeup, use them even when you're decorating your home. A lot of people gravitate to the colors that they look good in, and you can use them in other ways or even pairing colors together. How do we do that? So that is a mini one. And in that one, I'm just giving you your best neutrals, your colors to avoid, your jewelry choices. But when you come to my home and I do do it, I have a studio in my home, it's an hour and a half to two hour and we go through it all. You know, we go through it all. When I go into your closet, that's a whole different thing. And I do ask that people have a color analysis before I do a closet edit. Because once we know your colors, then organizing your closet, creating and curating a capsule wardrobe becomes so much easier. Laura Dugger: (13:57 - 14:08) Okay, we'll have to follow up on that. But first, I'm just so curious, which color person does not get pink, the warm, warm, warm. Carla Gasser: (14:08 - 17:23) So, those are people usually with Auburn red hair, you know, they're in that category. So, they get all the spices. And they're the opposite of someone like me, like I can't wear anything with like a gold, yellow undertone. You know, I can't really wear orange, the orange, I have one orange in my palette, believe it or not, but it's super bright. It's not an orange I probably would wear. One of the comments that someone made to me that said they were afraid to get a color analysis because they thought I would take too much away from them. Right? They would I would take away their favorite colors; I would tell them they don't look good in things they look good in. Most people, it's so interesting, because sometimes when you come to my home, I ask you to bring some clothes with you, like bring something that everyone says when you walk in a room, wow, you look great in that. And bring something that you don't ever reach for in your closet, because you're not sure of. And people are closer than they think to knowing their, their right colors. Sometimes I kind of shake them up a bit. But I give them so much that some people say, well, I can't possibly wear all these colors. There's 36 colors here. And I try to tell people focus on your neutrals, because people have different neutrals, right? Focus on your neutrals and then add one to two pop colors per season. Because if you try to wear every color in there, that you know, your closet is going to be very cluttered and very overwhelming. But it really helps you declutter and focus because there are stores I walk into now that I literally make one loop and I walk right back out. Because they're all these light colors and palettes and warm tones. And I call it cafe latte dressing that you would look gorgeous in. But for me, so why would I waste my time in that store? Right, I walk in real quick. And I've taught women how to shop, right? Because how many of us were taught how to shop, we go in, we go to the sale rack, we go in, we look for something that's trending, we go in, and we bring it home. And we stand in front of our closet every morning and say what, I have nothing to wear. Right? I have nothing to wear because our closets are full of things that don't match with each other, that we don't feel good in, that we might have bought because we thought it was a deal. But we don't know if they look good on us. We don't know if they work on our body shape. We don't know how to put them together with what we already have. So, less really is more. I'm not trying to get people to go out and spend thousands of dollars on a whole new wardrobe. I ask, especially in a closet edit, we're going to work first with what you have. And then you might have to go out and buy one or two key pieces. But really my last closet edit, she had to buy three things at the end. That was it. To make over, we talked about, we ended up making her at least 35 different outfits with what she already had and going out and buying three pieces. That was it. Laura Dugger: (17:24 - 20:14) We'll come back shortly after a brief message from our sponsor. With over 28 years of experience in real estate, Sue Neihouser of the Sue Neihouser team is a RE-MAX agent of Central Illinois, and she loves to walk alongside her clients as they unlock new doors. For anyone local, I highly recommend you call Sue today at 309-229-8831. And you can ask her any real estate questions. Sue lives in Central Illinois and loves this community and all that it has to offer. When unlocking new doors with her clients, Sue works hard to gain a depth of understanding of their motivations and dreams and interests in buying and selling their home. And then she commits to extensive market research that will give them confidence in their decision. Sue truly cares for each of her clients and the relationship she forms with each family along the entire home buying or selling process. This was absolutely our experience when we worked with Sue and her team. The house that we desired at the time was actually not even on the market, but Sue had a connection and was able to ask those homeowners if they would be willing to sell. She was timely in her response as she walked us through this whole process, and she helped us sell our home with the right offer coming in hours after it was listed. We kept saying she's thought of everything, and Sue's continued generosity was astonishing. I remember one afternoon after we had settled into our new home and she was knocking on the door dropping off a goodie bag for our family that came from the local bakery. Our daughters also loved getting to know Ms. Sue as she assisted us in finding truly our dream home. So, whether you're looking to buy a home for the first time or looking to upgrade or downsize or making the big decision to move to an assisted living from your home of many years, Sue will be there to help you navigate the big emotions and ensure the process is smooth and stress-free and that the new doors to be unlocked are ready and waiting for more memories to be made. So, call her today at 309-229-8831 or visit her website at sueneihouser.com. Thanks for your sponsorship. Okay, so that also makes me curious when you talk about the colors that you put together. Yes. Do you use a color wheel, or do you have any practical ways that we can learn how to put different colors together in our home or in our closet? Carla Gasser: (20:14 - 22:34) Right, that goes back to the contrast level that we talked about, and it also goes back to body shape. So, contrast level is can you wear, you know, high contrast prints or outfits? Like I can wear black and white. Would I tell you to do that? Probably not. So, when you know what your contrast level is, that not only informs your prints, your patterns, your colors, it informs your outfits. Here's a quick tip about dressing for your body shape. All right, we talk about inner column versus outer column. So, if you carry your weight in your belly and this is a, you know, I always tell women when I'm speaking to them, place your hands on the one area of yourself that you wish you could camouflage, right? And some of us go to our hips. Some of us, we all have it, right? But if that is your area, your belly is your area, and I like to camouflage it. What you want to create is an inner column. How do you create an inner column? So, if you were looking at my outfit right now, an inner column would be that this blue here, I would wear the same color pants. I've got an inner column. And then I put this jacket over it because when you look at that inner column, there's no waist definition. There's no, it's just an inner column. It makes me look taller. It makes me look thinner. It, you know, draws the eye up to the face. We always want to draw the eye up to the face. Now, if your problem area is more your hips and you want to camouflage that, but you've got a smaller waist, then you do an outer column. Whereas with me, again, I keep the blue shirt. I tuck it in, but I wear black pants because black and black. So, those are just two quick little tips that people could take away based on, you know, an inner column also works well for people who are large chested, who want to kind of camouflage this part, you know, who have kind of a roundness here and outer column again, works for people who also maybe have a more of a pear shaped or, um, not only pear shaped, but like an hourglass figure, an outer column would work better for, does that help? Laura Dugger: (22:34 - 22:53) Does that make sense? This is so helpful. And I'm wondering, are there any principles that apply to everyone specifically? I mean, even thinking first when it's summer and when somebody has a tan or when they naturally start graying, how does that work? Does their color change? Carla Gasser: (22:54 - 25:38) Yes, it does. It does. And we can customize color decks and color codes. So, I have a few women who are transitioning to gray. They're not there yet, but they're in between. So, what I'm going to do is pull out from their deck, anything that is yellowing or has that warmer undertone and keep her in the cool until, and I also say to people, if you come to me and like you're this one day and you say, Carol, I'm going to go red. I'm going to be a redhead. I will color code you again for free because that's how much I believe in the system. And that's how much I believe your hair matters for your color code. So, if you change your color code and you're my color and you say, you know, I'm going to go platinum. Yeah. I just think it'll be fun. Come back. We will. So, you're right. Your hair has a lot to do with it now in terms of tanning, right? Same thing. I would probably just direct you. I wouldn't change your color code. I would just direct you to certain colors in your, in your color code more than others. If you're darker or lighter, does that make sense? That does that's helpful. So, it's perfectly customizable. And that's the whole thing about when I tell people, when I have you as a client, you can go around and tell your friends and brag that you have a stylist because you do, you know, you can text me, you, I get a lot of texts from dressing rooms, women standing there in the mirror, taking the picture, going Carla, does this work? Does this not work? Do these shoes work? That's what I'm here for. I want an ongoing relationship. I don't like, I mean, I do one and dones. Okay. If I'm in a boutique or something and you come in from out of town, you can still contact me. I do virtual, I do, you know, all these kinds of things, but I love having a client as an ongoing relationship because you might change your body, change your season of life, change. You were working now you're not, or you're going back to work, and you haven't been working. All those things affect what you're going to wear and how you're going to wear and where you shop. I just had a woman who, you know, broke her foot and she's in a boot and she is so upset about this because we just did her closet edit. We just started thinking, well, what shoes should I wear? So, we've been working together to modify her outfits. We've been working together to get her to a place where she still feels comfortable, but she has to wear this boot. Okay. We can work around that. We can do that. You know, and I have people who go on vacation. I have no idea what to pack for vacation. I could only have a carry on. We're going to create a capsule wardrobe for your vacation. We can do that. Laura Dugger: (25:39 - 26:09) It is crazy to think of how much this plays into our lives every day. And so, once you learn this, I think it can save you time and money. I'm also thinking of one other principle. We always hear about the little black dress, but the funny thing is black is the absence of all colors. So, I remember studying that black near the face, even if that's in your palette, that that's not recommended. So, I'd love to hear your thoughts on that, Carla. Carla Gasser: (26:09 - 28:18) Yes. I would say black near the face only works for a few of us. You're right. And I'm one of them, right? Because of this high contrast, but I still like to break it up with color myself. I have an interesting story for you. I had a friend who really, she should not wear black by her face at all. She is a soft color code. She got invited to a wedding and everyone had to wear black. She freaked out. I just got my colors done. What am I going to do? I have to go to this. I said, first of all, we have to respect the bride and groom. Yes. This is what you want and whatever. What we did, though, is we bought her a huge, chunky leopard necklace. It broke it up and she bought leather leopard shoe shoes and wore the black. So, there are ways. And I say to people, when I take away black from you and you have all these black clothes at home, I'm like, I don't want you to donate everything to goodwill, but we're going to think of ways to break this up. And one of the ways we break it up near the face is a larger necklace, a scarf, a third piece like this, a vest or a cardigan. There are ways to do it without going home and saying, oh my word, I have to throw everything away. And then I'll try to redirect those people. Okay, now that you know your neutrals are no longer black, there are a lot of other great neutrals out there. Dark brown, gray, navy. So, now when you go shopping, don't throw all your black away, but start incorporating other neutrals into your wardrobe that are softer for you and work better for you. And like you asked before, too, are there some colors that everyone can wear? And I would, I could give you one. There's a couple, but one color that is kind of the universal color that everybody has in about the same shade is teal. It's kind of the couch you're sitting on. If I read it correctly in your, on the video, teal is kind of a universal color. So, that's something. Laura Dugger: (28:19 - 28:21) I had no idea. I love that. Carla Gasser: (28:22 - 28:22) Yeah. Laura Dugger: (28:22 - 28:35) And have you ever even studied the psychology related to colors? For instance, how we can perceive people differently when they are dressed in their best color? Carla Gasser: (28:36 - 30:08) No, I haven't personally studied that, but I have seen women. Like I just got a testimony the other day, I was asking some of my clients, like, what would you say? And I had this young mom who said, you know, it wasn't low self-esteem that kept me dressing this way. It was apathy. And I thought that was a really strong word. And she walked into church and she actually sings at church. So, she's up on stage and we just talked about a few tweaks and she's like everybody said something to me after. And they said, “You sang louder, you were glowing, you were shining.” And she goes, “I felt I didn't do anything different, but just wear what we talked about and changed my clothes.” So, I do think people notice, I think that there is a radiance that comes from within. Not only are you more confident, but I do think again, it highlights your face. And when your face is highlighted, people are attracted to that, you know? And I always make a big point when I'm out and about doing my grocery shopping, going to the drugstore, going to the post office, and I see someone wearing the right color. I don't tell her I'm a color now. I don't go through all that. I just said, you know, you look fabulous in that color. And I'm like, give me a big smile if they're not smiling. And they're just like, well, who is this woman? I go, and they walk out like two inches taller. Laura Dugger: (30:09 - 31:30) When was the first time you listened to an episode of The Savvy Sauce? How did you hear about our podcast? Did a friend share it with you? Will you be willing to be that friend now and text five other friends or post on your socials anything about The Savvy Sauce that you love? If you share your favorite episodes, that is how we continue to expand our reach and get the good news of Jesus Christ in more ears across the world. So, we need your help. Another way to help us grow is to leave a five-star review on Apple Podcasts. Each of these suggestions will cost you less than a minute, but it will be a great benefit to us. Thank you so much for being willing to be generous with your time and share. We appreciate you. Well, I love that you've mentioned Sherri Brandel because she's the one who founded Style by Color, but she was also a previous guest on The Savvy Sauce. So, I'll make sure and link to her fantastic episode. And I love her testimony. But with you, Carla, at Style by Color, do you ever keep records of the percentage of people who make up each category, or have you even noticed patterns of which ones are most or least common? Yes. Carla Gasser: (31:31 - 33:10) I think it depends on where you live because when we get all together for consultants, because we do have continuing education, I'm part of their professional development program. So, I'm trained every month in something new, like whether it's hair or makeup or trends or just different things. But we get together once a year for our conference and we talk about where we live. It seems to me, and I live in Northeast Ohio, kind of between Cleveland and Akron, a lot of the women in my area seem to be softs. There's a lot of soft. I do a lot of soft. Very rarely do I do someone like me. Now, if you go down, I think in my family, I'm Italian. Most of my Italian relatives are deeps, not as clear as me because they have more of the olive skin. For some reason, I got this very light skin. I do tan, but I don't tan on my face for some reason. You notice my arms are darker than my face. So, I do think it kind of runs that way, kind of where you live and maybe a little bit by ethnicity or background. However, I have said to people, because we do this tonal color analysis, there can be people who are clear that don't look exactly like me because what am I doing? I'm comparing their hair to their skin, to their eyes. I'm not comparing them to me. So, I think that's what makes this unique and makes it very customizable for people. Yes. Laura Dugger: (33:11 - 33:19) Makes sense. Okay. And this may sound a little overly dramatic, but how have you seen this process improve someone's life? Carla Gasser: (33:20 - 35:30) Oh, wow. I wish I could read you. I mean, I have some testimonials here that I was just looking through last night and to get prepared for this. One person said, when I looked at my closet, I felt overwhelmed. I kept buying new things, but none of them seemed to solve my problem. So, many great pieces, but never seemed to be able to pull things together. Carla came to the rescue. Her instructions on preparing for a meeting were concise and clear. And our 90-minute session flew by. By the time we were finished, I was feeling so excited about all the new possibilities. Now I find it so easy to step into my closet, a place that once scared me. Take a quick look and decide what to wear for any occasion. Before, I just had my colors for shopping, but now I have the missing piece of fabric and fit and how to put it all together. So, that's one of them. Another one said thanks for being such an encouragement to me, for showing me how to dress. And so, I feel beautiful. I'm thankful that I've never struggled with self-esteem the way many women do. But for me, I had become very apathetic, knowing I could probably do better, but not really caring or getting frustrated when I tried, when I tried didn't work the way I thought it should. You have helped me to see what many times I've picked close to the right colors or I've settled for good enough when I could have added pieces to make it beautiful. Thank you for listening and obeying what God asked you to step out into this vocation to make women feel beautiful from the inside out. You've been a blessing. So, I do think it has changed women. I have had women say I spend less money. I spend less time. I feel more confident at work. I feel more confident like she said at church, you know, being in front of someone. So, yeah, I think it makes a measurable difference in people's lives. If they apply it, you know, I think there are women who are one and done that come in, they just want to know what their colors are, and they walk out and you know, but even that does add something to your life, I think. So, yes, I do think it makes a difference. It's definitely personally made a difference in my own life. Laura Dugger: (35:31 - 35:35) So, anything you'd want to elaborate on that how it's made a difference in your own life. Carla Gasser: (35:36 - 38:10) I think I had gotten into kind of similarly to the testimonial I just read of someone of just, you know, not caring. You know, I had four kids at home. I was running everywhere. I wanted what was comfortable. I wanted what was quick. And what happened was I had gotten into this really gray phase, not realizing that the gray was really reflecting how I was feeling on the inside. And after I was, I went to a speaker's convention, because I'm also a speaker and Sherry actually did my colors. She was at this event. And so, I met her in person, and we have become great friends since I came home and I started changing it and I have three boys and a girl. Who do you think noticed that I was changing before? It was my boys. And my one son said to me, “I love that you're wearing brighter colors. It reminds me of when I was younger, that you always wore colors like that when I was little. Like I always remember my mom showing up and she was in and he goes, and you haven't done that in a long time. And I thought there's something more like we were talking before about the psychology. I would also feel like it was a spiritual thing too, for me that I had kind of just settled in a lot of ways. And I think women think that they're hiding in bigger clothes or in drab colors because they don't want to be seen or they don't feel their worth or they have shame, they have regret, they have all these things. And I used to also when I would dress up and go places, have you ever had people say to you, why are you so dressed up? Why are you wearing that? And it would make me shrink. It would make me feel awful. Like I'm not trying to show you up. I'm not trying. I just, this is what I like to wear. And I changed that total attitude around. And we would go out with the group of women. They're like, there you are, Carlo. What are you wearing that for? And I said, you know what? I'm your fancy friend. Call me your fancy friend. I'm going to dress up like your fancy friend. And when we go places, this is what I feel like. And I said, and if you want to wear sweats, I don't care. That's what makes you comfortable. That makes you feel good about yourself. But I feel like sometimes we dress for other women and other people before we dress for ourselves. Laura Dugger: (38:11 - 39:13) Well, that's really good. And even how you mentioned there's a spiritual component. I think of Jesus teaching on so many object lessons and that he would use something external to talk about the internal spiritual condition. And it reminds me of another guest, Jamie Erickson, who wrote the book on holy Hygge, just on that concept of our inner life will be reflected outwardly as well. And last piece, just with the psychology, I do remember one thing with the psychology of color, just that when somebody is in their best palette, that we naturally trust them more. And so, it's just unique, all the things that we're probably unaware of, but this really does matter. Absolutely. And so then beyond just our clothing, can you share some more of your best tips? I'm thinking makeup and jewelry, colored print options, and just your general styling tips. Carla Gasser: (39:14 - 43:53) I think one other demonstration that I do a lot, too, that I do with women is I think we undervalue the importance of accessories, that you could take a very simple outfit and change it up with accessories. And it's not buying more clothes. It's just taking things off, adding things. And so, I went to a women's group here in town and I wore a basic jumpsuit. And I told them, this is how I would wear this jumpsuit if I was just running out and about. And I put tennis shoes on. I put a simple necklace on, simple handbag, one out. And they're like, great. I said, okay, now I'm going to meet some friends for lunch. Same jumpsuit. Put sandals on, put a little cardigan on, put a thicker necklace on. So, I was teaching them, you could take one outfit and style it three to four or five different ways just by accessories. So, that's one tip. I would say don't neglect or overlook accessories. The other thing is, know what accessories work for your frame. If you've ever seen a woman who's like 5'10", wearing a purse this big, it doesn't work. Likewise, someone who's 5'2", wearing one of those huge canvas tote bags, you've got to match your accessories to your frame. Right? So, if you're, you know, 5'2 and under, your accessories need to be more delicate and smaller to fit you. Likewise, like someone was saying, but, you know, I love those statement necklaces that you wear. And I'm only five, you know, my mom is tiny. She's only like 5'1", 5'2". And I'm like, what you can do if you want to achieve that effect is layering your necklaces. They're all tiny and delicate. But if you put three of them together, you're giving the illusion of having something more, but it's not overpowering you, something like that. So, I think those two tips that women, you know, can overlook is accessorize. And one tip that Sherry gave that revolutionized it for me, and I didn't believe her when she first told me this tip, and yet she stands by it. And now I stand by it. When we were growing up, my mom said that your shoes must match your purse or your handbag. That was a rule, right? Sherry does not believe in that rule. She says your shoes must match your hair. So, I thought about that because I wear all different color shoes, but I had gone to a wedding that summer and I wore a red dress to the wedding. It's one of my best colors, right? But that was the time when those nude shoes were really popular. You know what I'm talking about? They were kind of patent and nude, and they were, you know, rounded toe, high heel. And I thought, well, I'm not going to the prom. So, I'm not going to buy red shoes, right? I need to buy a neutral shoe to go with a red dress. So, I went back and looked at a picture of myself in that red dress standing next to my husband in those shoes. And it looked like I was floating. I took that dress on, but again, I put black shoes on, and I took a picture of myself and I put them side by side because I needed proof. I need visual proof. Totally different look. Because what she says is when you're wearing all one color, a lot of times one color and outfit, your shoes and your hair frame your outfit. And I can show you picture after picture where it works. And when I speak to women, I put those pictures up there and they're like, and I'm like, I know, isn't that crazy. And she also says your handbag should match your hair, your everyday handbag. Nine times out of 10, I asked this question, if I gave you $500 and you could go buy a really nice designer handbag, what color would you buy? 75 to 80% of women say what? Probably black, black, right? They all say black. And then I'll show them pictures of how much better a woman looks pulled together when her everyday handbag, that doesn't mean you can't wear a pink handbag or, you know, to spice up your outfit. If it's part of your accessory look, that's not saying that, but your everyday standard handbag that you're going to invest money in, that's going to be with you for several years should match your hair. Laura Dugger: (43:54 - 44:04) Wow. That is so interesting to me. And I think it would be fun to do pictures, the before and after, and just see that sometimes those visuals are helpful. Carla Gasser: (44:04 - 44:12) They help a lot, but you'll start noticing it now or go online and start looking. I'll tell the women to do that and they'll, they'll be blown away. Laura Dugger: (44:13 - 44:21) Well, and now that we do have all of this information, how can we begin to edit or curate our closet? Carla Gasser: (44:23 - 47:24) So, when I do a closet edit, I do give them some homework to do before I get there. And I ask them to go through their closet and do, um, for three to four things. First thing is pull out anything that you're going to donate or consign. Okay. If you haven't worn it in two years, if it's stained, if it's, you know, that might be a throwaway, but you're going to make those piles, give away, throw away, and then maybe consign if it's something really good. And, you know, this is also based on first having a color analysis. Like I said before, if you don't have a color analysis, it's very hard for me to go into your closet. Okay. So, that's one thing you do next thing. We pull up anything that is seasonal from your closet. If you're not wearing it now, because you live where I live and you're not wearing sleeveless or shorts or whatever, put that in a bin, put it away. The other thing is put away a trendy. Okay. Skinny jeans were a thing, and everybody loved their skinny jeans. Do I think skinny jeans might come back? They might, if they, if you still like them, if they still fit you, put them in a bin, put your trending kind of clothes, long cardigans aren't in right now. How many long cardigans do you have? You probably have five, you probably have six and you probably love them. It's okay. I'm not telling you to throw them away, put them in a bin and we're going to store those someplace else. So, there are certain things that you could start doing. The other thing that I think is very helpful is I line my closet up with my neutrals first, and then my colors, you know, white, black and gray and Navy are my neutrals. I lined those up. Then I start lining up my colors and my patterns. So, I think that's a very helpful way because, you know, putting outfits together becomes a lot easier because I pick a neutral, I pick a pattern, I pick a color, you know, kind of like you're probably too young for animals where the kids had to match the tags. When we were little, it was like, we went to the store and there was a, you know, a clothing line called grant or animals. And like, you match the monkey with the monkey, the monkey had on the top, the tag was like a monkey and the tag in the bottom. There you go. There's your clothes. So, I mean, there are systems. I also love boutiques. And I'm noting that noticing this more about boutiques that are color coded. There's a boutique in my town that you walk in, and she's got all the beige and neutral colors here. She is all black and white here. She has all her blues here. And wow is easy to shop when they do that for you. And I think that's coming back. I'm seeing that more, like I said, in independently owned boutiques. I don't think you're going to find that as much. But even I went into the loft the other day and they had their clothes kind of in a color. So, that I think helps too. That helps a lot. Laura Dugger: (47:25 - 47:37) That's a great tip for organizing our closet. And is there any edit that you would want to make to our makeup bag or addition that you just think everybody should try? Carla Gasser: (47:39 - 48:58) We work with a company that does lipstick and lip gloss by color code. And it's called Lipstick Boss Beauty. And I sell that as well. And I think women underestimate the power of a lip. Now, because I'm so pale, I absolutely need it. You know what I mean? But even for people who aren't pale, she sells them by color code. And I have samples with me, and I always have women try it on. And they are so surprised at how it brings the look together. You know, I know a lot of women are intimidated by a lot of makeup, eye makeup, whatever. But I say if you put on a lip gloss, a good foundation and blush and mascara, you don't have to worry about the rest if you're not into it. If you're into it, great, go. But I also said when you go to Sephora or Ulta or even your local drugstore that has a lot of good makeup that you probably can use, bring your colors with you. That will help you pick out a blush. That will help you pick out a lip color. But yeah, I think women totally underestimate just a simple lip gloss, tinted lip gloss or lipstick. I think it really pulls things together. Laura Dugger: (48:59 - 49:11) And I love, I love that idea and just all of your offerings. So, if anybody wants to give this a try, can you share more about the resources that you have available? Carla Gasser: (49:12 - 51:51) Yeah, I would think that the best place I would send them to is my website, which is just my name, www.carla, with a C, Gasser, G-A-S-S-E-R. And on there, there's a page that has all of my services. And one of the things on there that I keep telling women to take advantage of, you could book a free 15-minute consultation with me. I do that for everyone. If you just don't even know where to start, and you're like, I just want to learn more. I just want to know how I could do this. Also, my first client ever was from Canada, virtually. When I first got, you know, she had followed me for my faith resources and all of that. And when she saw I got certified, she reached out to me, and I can do virtual appointments. If you send in your photo to me, we have a whole system of plugging it in and working through it. And we put a whole presentation, I create a customized presentation for you, and I send it to you. But we talk like this, but you know, I take your photo and I put it into kind of capes like this, but they're digital. And we see, and so yes, but I would start with looking at my page and then booking that free 15-minute consultation to just ask me, you know, where do I start? What do you offer? And everything's listed there. So, I also, if you want to be part of my email list, you could sign up online on that same page and you get access to a free style personality quiz. Because style personality, we talked about it a little bit earlier that you don't have to dress like me. We have four style personalities that we kind of curate, but I created a quiz so that you can kind of answer these questions and figure out, oh, I lean more towards this. And once we do that, then I can tell you more what places to shop because I'm not going to send someone who is more of a casual, a natural chic to a Chico's. That doesn't fit their style. They would probably go to J. Joe, you know? So, it's kind of that kind of a thing. So, that's just a fun little freebie that I give away if you want to sign up. And my email list, I usually, my newsletter goes out almost every Tuesday or Wednesday with different tips. I give you links to things. I give you examples. I'm really good about showing you pictures of things. We talk about trends. We talk about all kinds of things. So, yeah. And that's just free to be part of my newsletter. Laura Dugger: (51:52 - 52:11) That is incredible. We will certainly link to all of that in the show notes for today's episode, which you can find on your podcast platform. Or if you go to thesavvysauce.com under show notes, you can find all of the links for today's episode. And are you willing to share, what are those four? Did you say personality? Carla Gasser: (52:12 - 53:39) Yes. One is called natural chic. The next one is called classic modern. The third one is style fashionista. And the fourth one is creative original. So, I ask you a ton of questions based on like, what do you feel comfortable in or what fabrics you like? And based on that, you add up, you know, kind of, and if you're mostly A's, you're this, if you're mostly B's, you're this, C's, D's. So, it just helps you. Because again, I think that is a missing piece for a lot of women. They don't know what their style is. And so, they look at someone like, oh, I love that. But why doesn't that look good on me? I go, well, does it feel like you? Well, if it doesn't feel like you, then that's why you're not comfortable in it. You know? And like I said, you know, I like to push the envelope a little bit more. I am not going to be, you know, a classic modern. I am more of a style fashionista or creative original. I mean, I found this, this is like an old, in a boutique in Italy of all places. If you see, it's kind of like got these raw edges because they took a man's old suit jacket, cut it, and then put all these pearls on it. I mean, you're not going to find that. And not every person wants to wear something like crazy as that, but I love it. You know? So that's my personality. But someone else is just like, I just love silk and linen and good cotton. And I like to feel comfortable. Great. I can recommend tons of clothes for you and tons of places to shop. Laura Dugger: (53:40 - 53:43) I love that. Well, and I think that piece is so fun. Carla Gasser: (53:43 - 53:44) Thank you. Laura Dugger: (53:44 - 54:09) And it's so great to see how you dress everything to your personality and you reflect beauty inside and out. But Carl, I think you may already be aware we're called the Savvy Sauce because savvy is synonymous with practical knowledge or insight. And so, as my final question for you today, what is your Savvy Sauce? Carla Gasser: (54:11 - 55:06) I would say my Savvy Sauce is allowing God to transform me from the inside out and make me beautiful. I love the clothes. I love the fashion and the colors. I've talked to you about it for over an hour. I could keep talking about it. It is a passion of mine, but if there was a secret Savvy Sauce to that, it would be inviting God in to transform me and make me beautiful from the inside out, because there are a lot of beautiful people out there, right? But if they're not reflecting God's beauty, then we're missing it. And when I want people attracted to me, it's so that I can share with them the hope that's within, not so I can tell them where to get the best shirt or wear the best color. I want to ultimately bring them the hope of Jesus. That's why I do it. So, that's my Savvy Sauce. Laura Dugger: (55:07 - 55:40) Well said, Carla. You are a beautiful woman with a beautiful combination of giftings. I just love that you're a Bible teacher and a color analysis or consultant. And that's in addition to the many other roles that you hold. But practical chats really do help us to live intentionally. And you've done that for us today. So, thank you for sharing your fascinating career with us. I love your expertise and I really enjoyed getting to host you. So, thank you for being my guest. Carla Gasser: (55:40 - 56:05) And thanks for doing what you're doing. I love stuff like this. This is great. And it's bringing women together. And like you said, it's giving them that practical knowledge that we all need and can look for. There's so many places that you can go to, and not all of that knowledge is uplifting or leading you in the right direction. So, I'm thankful for people like you who do what you do as well. So, thank you. Laura Dugger: (56:05 - 59:22) Thank you. Appreciate that. One more thing before you go. Have you heard the term gospel before? It simply means good news. And I want to share the best news with you. But it starts with the bad news. Every single one of us were born sinners, but Christ desires to rescue us from our sin, which is something we cannot do for ourselves. This means there's absolutely no chance we can make it to heaven on our own. So, for you and for me, it means we deserve death and we can never pay back the sacrifice we owe to be saved. We need a savior. But God loved us so much. He made a way for his only son to willingly die in our place as the perfect substitute. This gives us hope of life forever in right relationship with him. That is good news. Jesus lived the perfect life we could never live and died in our place for our sin. This was God's plan to make a way to reconcile with us so that God can look at us and see Jesus. We can be covered and justified through the work Jesus finished if we choose to receive what he has done for us. Romans 10 9 says that if you confess with your mouth Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. So, would you pray with me now? Heavenly Father, thank you for sending Jesus to take our place. I pray someone today right now is touched and chooses to turn their life over to you. Will you clearly guide them and help them take their next step in faith to declare you as Lord of their life? We trust you to work and change lives now for eternity. In Jesus name we pray. Amen. If you prayed that prayer, you are declaring him for me, so me for him. You get the opportunity to live your life for him. And at this podcast, we're called the Savvy Sauce for a reason. We want to give you practical tools to implement the knowledge you have learned. So, you ready to get started? First, tell someone. Say it out loud. Get a Bible. The first day I made this decision, my parents took me to Barnes and Noble and let me choose my own Bible. I selected the Quest NIV Bible and I love it. You can start by reading the book of John. Also, get connected locally, which just means tell someone who's a part of a church in your community that you made a decision to follow Christ. I'm assuming they will be thrilled to talk with you about further steps such as going to church and getting connected to other believers to encourage you. We want to celebrate with you too, so feel free to leave a comment for us here if you did make a decision to follow Christ. We also have show notes included where you can read scripture that describes this process. And finally, be encouraged. Luke 15:10 says, "in the same way I tell you, there is rejoicing in the presence of the angels of God over one sinner who repents." The heavens are praising with you for your decision today. And if you've already received this good news, I pray you have someone to share it with. You are loved and I look forward to meeting you here next time.
On this week's episode of Out and About, Dr. Mae Gilliland of ArtsPartners of Central Illinois talks with Angela Bottrell, co-chair of the Peoria Heights Fine Art Fair, about the upcoming two-day event taking place May 9 and 10 in Tower Park. The juried fair features artists working across a wide range of mediums, from painting and photography to sculpture, jewelry, and fiber arts. Angela shares how the event supports working artists while creating a vibrant weekend for the community in the heart of Peoria Heights.
On this week's episode of Out and About, Dr. Mae Gilliland of ArtsPartners of Central Illinois talks with Diana Klein, executive director of the Wheels O' Time Museum, about the museum's 2026 season opening on May 1 and a full lineup of events celebrating transportation history through hands-on experiences.
For the longest time, Los Angeles has been the capital of the filmmaking industry in America. But that's been changing in recent years. In Illinois, more than 700 million dollars were spent on film production just last year. Central Illinois has had a share of that.
Susan Danenberger was diagnosed with Stage I breast cancer at 48, and again at 50 with Stage IV metastatic breast cancer (MBC). A fifth-generation farmer and winemaker, she owns Danenberger Family Vineyards in Central Illinois. In this episode, Susan reads her essay, “Rosé-Colored Glasses,” from the 2025 Body issue of Wildfire Journal. Her piece draws us into a deeply personal story of body image, beauty, and transformation after breast cancer—one that begins with stilettos and selfies, and unfolds into a powerful journey of reckoning and rebuilding. April and Susan will talk about autonomy in the context of cancer, trusting (and questioning) medical providers, seeing yourself through the eyes of others, and financial toxicity. They also discuss how connecting with other survivors at New York Fashion Week changed Susan's life.More about episode sponsor Young Survival Coalition: https://youngsurvival.org/Learn more about Susan:https://www.instagram.com/stilettosinthevineyard/https://danenbergerfamilyvineyards.com/Purchase the Body issue of Wildfire Journal: https://www.wildfirecommunity.org/shop/p/print-body25Buy the Wildfire book Igniting the Fire Within: Stories of Healing, Hope & Humor, Inside Today's Young Breast Cancer Community: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0BJVJ629F?ref_=pe_3052080_397514860Get the free Wildfire “Hot Flashes” email newsletter: https://www.wildfirecommunity.org/newsletter?rq=newsletterLearn about Wildfire writing workshops: https://www.wildfirecommunity.org/workshopsShop Wildfire merch & more: https://www.wildfirecommunity.org/shop*Free* Get Wildfire and The Burn freebies here: https://www.wildfirecommunity.org/freeMore about Wildfire Journal: https://www.wildfirecommunity.orghttps://www.instagram.com/wildfire_bc_magazine/https://www.facebook.com/wildfirecommunityInformation on submitting your story for consideration to be published in Wildfire Journal: https://www.wildfirecommunity.org/submissions
Toxic Relationships: Recognizing Narcissism in a Spouse, Parent, or Child with Kris Reece (Episode 288) *Disclaimer* This episode contains mature content and user discretion is suggested. Proverbs 27:6 AMP “Faithful are the wounds of a friend [who corrects out of love and concern], But the kisses of an enemy are deceitful [because they serve his hidden agenda].” *Transcription Below* Kris Reece is a Christian Author, Toxic Relationship Coach, and Manipulation Tactics Specialist. Kris equips believers to escape the grip of toxic relationships—especially those shaped by guilt, confusion, or spiritual distortion. Her work empowers Christians to set biblical boundaries and walk in emotional and spiritual freedom. Connect with her on Instagram or through her website. Thank you to our sponsor for today's episode: Midwest Food Bank Topics and Questions We Cover: In your opinion, can you be a Christian and a narcissist? Will you share a few of the toxic tactics narcissists use for power and control in relationships? Will you define codependency for us and also reactive abuse and trauma bond? Other Related Episodes on The Savvy Sauce Podcast: 146 Biblical Response to Emotionally Destructive Relationships with Leslie Vernick 148 Overcoming Evil with Good: Recognizing Spiritual Abuse with Dr. Diane Langberg 263. Domestic Violence and Abuse: Identifying and Healing from Abusive Relationships with Stacey Womack Connect with The Savvy Sauce on Facebook or Instagram or Our Website Gospel Scripture: (all NIV) Romans 3:23 “for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God,” Romans 3:24 “and are justified freely by his grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus.” Romans 3:25 (a) “God presented him as a sacrifice of atonement, through faith in his blood.” Hebrews 9:22 (b) “without the shedding of blood there is no forgiveness.” Romans 5:8 “But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” Romans 5:11 “Not only is this so, but we also rejoice in God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have now received reconciliation.” John 3:16 “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.” Romans 10:9 “That if you confess with your mouth, “Jesus is Lord,” and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved.” Luke 15:10 says “In the same way, I tell you, there is rejoicing in the presence of the angels of God over one sinner who repents.” Romans 8:1 “Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus” Ephesians 1:13–14 “And you also were included in Christ when you heard the word of truth, the gospel of your salvation. Having believed, you were marked in him with a seal, the promised Holy Spirit, who is a deposit guaranteeing our inheritance until the redemption of those who are God's possession- to the praise of his glory.” Ephesians 1:15–23 “For this reason, ever since I heard about your faith in the Lord Jesus and your love for all the saints, I have not stopped giving thanks for you, remembering you in my prayers. I keep asking that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the glorious Father, may give you the spirit of wisdom and revelation, so that you may know him better. I pray also that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you, the riches of his glorious inheritance in the saints, and his incomparably great power for us who believe. That power is like the working of his mighty strength, which he exerted in Christ when he raised him from the dead and seated him at his right hand in the heavenly realms, far above all rule and authority, power and dominion, and every title that can be given, not only in the present age but also in the one to come. And God placed all things under his feet and appointed him to be head over everything for the church, which is his body, the fullness of him who fills everything in every way.” Ephesians 2:8–10 “For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith – and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God – not by works, so that no one can boast. For we are God‘s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.“ Ephesians 2:13 “But now in Christ Jesus you who once were far away have been brought near through the blood of Christ.“ Philippians 1:6 “being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.” *Transcription* Music: (0:00 – 0:10) Laura Dugger: (0:11 - 1:29) Welcome to The Savvy Sauce, where we have practical chats for intentional living. I'm your host, Laura Dugger, and I'm so glad you're here. Leman Property Management Company has the apartment you will be able to call home, with over 1,700 apartment units available in Central Illinois. Visit them today at lemanproperties.com or connect with them on Facebook. My captivating guest for this week is Kris Reece. She has an abundance of resources available online, and she's actually recently had this book published, Breaking the Narcissist's Grip. I cannot recommend this episode enough to you to find out about toxic relationships, whether that's with your parents or your adult children or your spouse. She's going to do a deep dive into narcissism. Help us understand it, help us identify those people in our lives, and most importantly, offer some hope, which is only possible through Jesus Christ. Here's our chat. Welcome to The Savvy Sauce, Kris. Kris Reece: (1:31 - 1:34) Thank you so much for having me. I am so blessed to be here. Laura Dugger: (1:34 - 1:48) Well, I am so grateful to have you, and you are in a unique line of work that is so needed. How did you get into this work of offering Christian advice for toxic relationships? Kris Reece: (1:50 - 4:16) Well, I'll give you the short version of that story. So, I had been in the fitness industry for a good 20 plus years, and I went back to school for counseling and theology because I really wanted to be able to help people emotionally and mentally as opposed to just physically, right? So, as I started to counsel people, there were women that were coming to me from all walks of life and all ages. I'm talking 16 years old all the way up to 86 years old. And no matter what their issue was, no matter what they were struggling with, they were coming to me for purpose or just growing in their faith. It all came down to one thing. And Laura, I think this might surprise you just as much as it surprised me. Toxic mothers. I was floored. And this wasn't the kind of thing where now we're just blaming mom for everything. No, this started to get revealed on all of the dysfunctions that were taking place within their relationship with their mother and how it had impacted them in so many areas of their lives. So, I said, “Lord, I need to dive deeper into this.” Now, I had already come out of, unfortunately, several toxic narcissistic relationships, not with my mother. So, that was very foreign to me. So, I started to dive deeper into how those same traits applied. And it was sad and it was very scary. So, I started teaching more on that. And then they started coming out of the woodwork. But what about my husband? What about my daughter? What about my boss? What about my... And it was just like a flood. And it reached a point where, Laura, I got to confess to you. I took this to the Lord and I said, please don't send me. I don't want to do this. This is toxic. It's like you're just dealing with this toxicity all day long. And once I began to rest in, not just talking about the toxic relationships, but understanding where His heart was in it and the healing that He wants, not only for the toxic people, but those weren't the ones that were coming to me, the ones that were affected and infected by it, is when my heart started to shift. I said, “okay, God, all right, send me.” And here we are. Many, many years later. Laura Dugger: (4:16 - 4:41) Well, you've done some incredible work. And I am shocked by that answer. Can you clarify too with the toxic mothers? That's not speaking to the mom who's trying her best asking the Lord for help and yet making mistakes. Would you consider them as mothers who are narcissists or does toxic embrace a wider? Kris Reece: (4:41 - 6:01) Toxic can embrace a much wider spectrum. It could be borderline personality disorder, even a lot of codependent traits. If they're not harnessed properly or surrendered to the Lord, it can be very toxic to our relationship. You know, you're dealing with the guilt and the manipulation. No, we are not in any way talking about a mother who's made some mistakes, hands up, who's surrendering all this to the Lord and really just trying to find her way, you know, regardless of whether it's a newborn, an infant, a teenager or an adult child. That's not what I'm referring to as a toxic mother. And some of them do struggle because it's so common for, I guess, young adults at this point to just be like, my mom's toxic because your mother had an opinion, because your mother is trying to get a little bit more time with you. Now, all of a sudden she's toxic. So, the label is unfortunate, but no, we're not referring to that type of mother. We're talking about the ones that have been approached lovingly and gently and are still standing firm in their manipulation, their guilt, their no, this is my way or the highway, their distorted view of scripture. I don't care if you're two or 42, you're called to obey me. That's the kind of toxic mother we're talking about. Laura Dugger: (6:01 - 6:13) That is helpful. And then just to zero in on that term, narcissist, can you just help us understand what characteristics define a narcissist? Kris Reece: (6:14 - 8:00) Yeah, absolutely. So, at its core, narcissism is less about confidence and it's more about this distorted sense of self. And that distorted sense is what damages relationships. Psychologically, narcissism can actually be marked by three pillars. Number one is an exaggerated sense of self-importance. They quite honestly believe that the world revolves around them. Two is a deep need for admiration. They crave validation and praise, and we call that supply. So, if you're giving it to them, you're on their good side. You're not, you're on the bad side. And then lastly is their lack of empathy. This is a true hallmark of narcissism. But I know you didn't ask this, but we kind of go down a little bit of a rabbit trail. Now that narcissists are starting to catch on to what these traits look like, they're doing what we call performative empathy. So, they're looking and they're saying all the right words. One of my, I love to say is they got the words, they ain't got the music. So, you really have to understand what true empathy looks like, but they lack empathy. So, and then what happens is from those traits are going to flow three roots, entitlement, arrogance, and manipulation. They twist everything and it's all about them. And one of the things that we need to understand is that a one-time selfish act doesn't make someone a narcissist. I've said some things that, oh boy, that I need to repent of. It doesn't make somebody a narcissist, but a lifestyle of self-protective empathy, lacking behavior at the expense of others. Yeah. Raise the red flag. Laura Dugger: (8:01 - 8:22) That's helpful. That even shows us the difference between a little self-absorbed or mistakes made and a narcissist. But then I'm also curious as we're raising children, do these traits show up early in life or when are they usually identifiable? Kris Reece: (8:23 - 10:25) That's a great question. One that I don't think you're ever going to be able to get a solid answer from anyone on, because narcissistic traits, while they don't just appear out of nowhere, we can say that they're formed in childhood. And we can say that probably almost every child is a bit narcissistic. I mean, we don't get like the terrible mind, mind twos from nowhere. I mean, as children, as human beings, I mean, even scripture tells us we are innately selfish. Our heart is deceptively wicked. So, the point of childhood is for the parents to now pull that out of the child, to grow that out. Right. And a lot of times that doesn't take place. So, what we have to understand is that the roots usually form in childhood, but the fruit shows up later in life. So, in childhood, you may notice things like entitlement, this extreme sensitivity to criticism, but kids, like we said, are naturally self-focused. So, that's actually going to be part of their normal development. So, kids are self-centered by nature, but narcissism becomes very concerning when someone never grows out of it. So, when we start to see by the teen years, you see that pattern take place and how they handle correction, how they handle empathy and accountability. And if empathy isn't growing, but entitlement is, oh, we've got a pretty big sign. So, now by adulthood, those narcissistic traits, they just become unmistakable. You see the manipulation, the blame shifting, the lack of accountability, the control, especially when life requires any type of humility. So, immaturity says, I messed up. Narcissism says, you made me do it. Laura Dugger: (10:25 - 11:04) Oh, that's helpful. And I guess just to put parents at ease, if they are parenting, let's say tweens and teens, I'd love to hear your take on this, but something we learned in grad school was that they said, “don't freak out when your child, even when your teen does this, because a lot of times teenagers could be fitting all of the description in the DSM for multiple things.” And that is part of adolescence and going through puberty and everything. But what I hear you saying is then if that pattern continues into adulthood, especially as you're developing certain things, but lacking empathy, that's one big concern. Is that correct? Kris Reece: (11:04 - 12:07) That is correct. That is why they don't diagnose teenagers with narcissism, because quite honestly, I would say about 98% of them would be diagnosed. So, no, that's why we don't, because a lot of teenagers are that way. So, yes, don't panic if your teenagers are acting that way. But the other thing that I would also say is don't chalk it up to a phase. It's a great opportunity to speak the truth in love. You may not think they're hearing it. You may not think they're receiving it, but we are responsible as parents for obedience, not outcome. Of course, we want the best outcome for our children possible, but we can't just chalk up those traits as, ah, they're just being teenagers. Ah, it's just a phase. No, as your parent, I need to teach you and train you out of that phase, not force you out of the phase, but I need to train you out of that phase. And then the rest is going to be up to them. Laura Dugger: (12:07 - 12:22) That's good. Knowing who's part to own. And would you say part of that then is disciplining them and discipling them, training them in the ways that we would think of or anything that you would add for how to help train our children out of these characteristics? Kris Reece: (12:23 - 13:39) Absolutely. So, we do want to train them in the way they're supposed to go. So, when there is entitlement, we don't chalk it up to a phase. We don't continue to give what they're expecting. So, there needs to be consequences for behavior. And I'm not talking harsh punishment, but there's two sides. So, if there is really bad behavior that needs to stop, then there needs to be a consequence for that. On the flip side, if it's behavior that could kind of be borderline, and I don't mean borderline personality, I just mean borderline in terms of is this bad or is this a phase, then it's a talking too. Hey, why did you decide to handle your classmate in this way? What do you think could have been a better way? What was the point of your outcome? What were you hoping the outcome would be, I should say? And then starting to really guide them through that, because they're still in their very formative years in terms of processing, in terms of how to cope with things. So, if they're now going to start defaulting to patterns that maybe that was taught or caught, we really want to take that opportunity to train them out of that. And we can do that with gentleness and love. And then, of course, use consequences when necessary. Laura Dugger: (13:40 - 13:52) That is so well summed up, Kris. I appreciate that. And then what are some types of narcissism that make it especially difficult to recognize at first? Kris Reece: (13:53 - 16:40) Oh, my favorite one. And I say that with seeping sarcasm. Is the covert narcissist. We would call that one the quiet one. And now if you want to add another layer of complexity, the Christian covert narcissist. This one is going to be the hardest type to detect because they don't look confident. They look wounded. They use self-pity. They use guilt. They use this emotional fragility. But they're using it to control others. And what we have to recognize is covert narcissists, they don't dominate the room. They dominate your emotions. They play the victim. So, you now feel responsible for their feelings, their life, their outcome. That's a scary one. The other one is what we call the communal or we could refer to them as more of the spiritual narcissist. This is what we would refer to as the helper or the holy one. So, they appear really generous. Big servant's heart, maybe in a serving profession. They're spiritually devoted, but it's all about image. And they're going to use the good deeds. They're going to use the faith, the ministry, or their morality as proof of their superiority. And they may quote the Bible, but they will use shame, silence, and scripture to control others. And the other one is, this is a little bit more of the obvious one, but we often disguise this in our society. And that's the overt. This is your classic narcissist. This is the one that people recognize. They're loud, they're attention seeking, they're boastful, they're arrogant, and they are just outwardly entitled. But we often, depending on the position that they're in, in business or politics, we're like, oh, they're confident. Oh, they're good leaders. They could be classic overt narcissists. And a lot of times these narcissists really go unrecognized because they always, always start with the charm or the kindness. My favorite is the connection. They establish this connection with you. They're gonna mirror your values, your interests, and yes, even your faith. And a lot of times they appear very wounded or generous, and the whole intention is to now just disarm you. Bottom line is a lot of narcissists, they're gonna wear different masks, but at the core, they're all the same. Laura Dugger: (16:41 - 18:35) And now a brief message from our sponsor. 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And in Morton, they offer a variety of apartment homes with garages, a hot downtown location, and now a brand-new high-end complex near Idlewood Park. If you want to become part of their team, contact them about open office positions. They're also hiring in their maintenance department. So, we invite you to find out why so many people have chosen to make a career with them. Check them out on Facebook today or email their friendly staff at leasing@lemanprops.com. You can also stop by their website at lemanproperties.com. Check them out and find your place to call home today. Do narcissists recognize or ever admit to being narcissists? Can they ever see that in themselves? Kris Reece: (18:36 - 20:20) That's a great question. And that's actually two-sided. So, the one where I would say no, they don't see that in themselves. They see themselves truly as entitled, as somebody who's been given the short straw, somebody who is owed something, the victim. They honestly don't see themselves as narcissistic. Then there's another side where they sort of see it and they actually will use that now to their advantage. See, this makes me somebody who is self-reflective. This is somebody who is, I'm willing to recognize where I've gone wrong. But the problem is, there's no depth there. You'll get generalities like, oh, I know I'm not perfect, but, and then you'll get a litany of justifications or you'll, I know I'm not perfect, but all of your sins are now laid out in detail. So, they will, if they do recognize it, they will use it to their advantage. Now there is that final subset that does start to recognize and they see, I don't want to be this way. Wow, I've caused a lot of destruction to relationships. I do want to change. And that road is really long, really long. But I'm not, I'm not of the camp that believes that narcissists don't change. They can, if they want to. It takes a lot to recognize it. And I've seen some do. Laura Dugger: (20:22 - 21:11) I appreciate that hope. You don't always hear that very often with this type of personality. But I think one more piece that has always been so confusing to me when loved ones have shared that they're in a relationship with someone who is a narcissist, whether that's their spouse or their parent is where I've been in friendship with people before. But they, all of their stories, no matter where they live in the world, the narcissist seems to struggle with the same things. They seem to act the same way. They're master manipulators. And I just don't understand how they all have the same playbook. And like you say, they lie even when they don't have to. So, as you've thought about this, are there any reasons why it's so similar across the board? Kris Reece: (21:14 - 23:27) Yes, because by nature, they are, they're lazy. They don't want to put in an effort. And they're also, what word would I use to describe this? It's almost like they're aliens to empathy. So, if you could imagine an alien coming from, I don't believe in aliens, so please don't hear what I'm not saying, but let's just imagine for a moment, you know, they come on this earth and they're like, oh, I got to adapt myself to these people. I got to fit in. What do I do? So, they're going to start listening. They're going to start mimicking behaviors and they're going to start testing to see what works and what doesn't work. So, for them, now we go back to that whole childhood thing. If they've learned that the only way to get what I want is to lie, the only way to get people to see me as XYZ is to manipulate, that's what they're going to do. And they're going to do it by default. And that's what people don't understand is that default mechanisms are so powerful that even a master manipulator could turn around and say, “you know, I really, I recognize, yeah, I do manipulate a little bit.” And then when push comes to shove, if they have not done the hard work to begin to dig and really understand where it came from, why it's there and start to develop the patterns to override it, they're going to default to the same way every single time. And that's why they lie so easily. It's just a default. Now, I'm not saying that as an excuse, but it's a default. And what they also don't realize is that this is not just psychological. This is spiritual. Narcissism is fueled by pride, deception, and control. Is that describing anybody we know? That's the enemy to the core. So, it's not that they're all just studying the same playbook. It is that they're all influenced by the same spirit. And that's what we're struggling with. Laura Dugger: (23:29 - 24:00) Wow. And that really, there was an aha moment, and I wrote this down, kind of what you're saying. But on page 133, you said, “it's like they're demonically inspired or at the very least, influenced.” And I think that makes so much sense. Even the insidious ways that they are cunning or crafty, that they're influenced by our enemy. That makes a lot more sense. Anything else that you would want to add to that? Kris Reece: (24:02 - 25:36) Yes. When we look at, I hate to, I don't like to label people. But when we look at how the enemy operates, let's look at how Satan operates. Kill, steal, destroy. Control, pride, deception, manipulation. If he is now influencing these people and they are not putting up any of the barriers, they're continuing to give him a foothold. They are now walking in his purpose. So, if Satan is looking to do this to you, why wouldn't his ambassadors? They are highly influenced by his behaviors, and they don't even realize it. So, yes, we can have compassion. We can take this to prayer because any stronghold can be broken. But that's got to be done by the power of Christ. So, we pray for their eyes to be open. We pray for them to see the wickedness of their ways and give them a desire to turn from it. But you're not going to change that. It's not going to happen, especially when it is so deeply spiritually rooted. Because a lot of times we get caught in the, well, I'm a good person. Well, I would never behave that way. If I knew I was doing that, I'd want to change. So, we think that our explanation alone is really just going to be the aha moment for the narcissist, right? So, we explain, we re-explain, we over-explain. And then what we don't realize is that now we just got caught in that trap as well. We're now playing that game on their turf and we're not going to win. We have got to hand over this spiritual battle to the Lord. Laura Dugger: (25:37 - 25:54) Okay, so then that makes me wonder, you said that there is hope. So, how is this treatable? You've kind of let us in on a little bit of it, but also can you just share if you have ever seen someone repent or change their ways? Kris Reece: (25:56 - 28:30) Yes, more than one. I've seen it on more than one occasion. It is a journey. It does not come from you just over loving them and just giving them passes and excuses and being more like Christ. It's usually from what I refer to as a two-by-four moment. When God just clunks them over the head, everything is lost, everything is gone, and everything that they held so dearly, meaning everything that was holding them up. So, if you can think about narcissists, they can't function on their own. They don't have their own self-identity. They don't have their own self-discipline. They don't have any other self-regulation. They have no sense of self. So, everything is external. So, when God is looking to change somebody, guess what's going to happen? He's going to start kicking out those crutches one by one, and then they're going to get the two-by-four moment, which is that knock over the head, like that road to Damascus experience that Paul went through. It's like, hello, are we going to wake up here? And that is when they start to have their awakening, and that is when they begin to pursue, hey, I think change might be possible. This is what happens to me. And then in that environment, if they're able to get met with then the love and the compassion, again, not the enabling, then you'll start to see that change begin to unfold. Narcissism is treatable, but not in the way people often imagine. It's not this surface-level behavioral issue. It's not getting somebody to say, I'm sorry, or getting somebody to validate you. It is a deep identity and a heart issue that is rooted in pride. And I don't know about you, there is not enough experience on the planet. I could never take somebody through that. That has got to be a God moment. And that's where I want to just caution people sometimes, especially if we struggle with codependency, thinking that we are now responsible for these people, that maybe God planted me in their lives for such a time as this. Stop, stop, stop. Guard your heart. Allow God to heal you of what's driving you now to want to fix this person. And truly, truly, if you really love this person, pray for them, go into warfare for them, but hand them over to the Lord. Laura Dugger: (28:32 - 28:48) Okay, so then another spiritual question, Kris, in your opinion, can someone be a Christian, a true born-again believer, and a narcissist? Ah, I love and I hate this question. Kris Reece: (28:52 - 32:44) Hilary, you're going to love and hate my answer. Yes and no. So, in one sense, yes. In the sense that somebody can actually profess faith and faith in Christ but still live in a way that looks absolutely nothing like him. And we see this all throughout scripture. But claiming Christ and following Christ are not the same thing. And that's where I believe that there are times where it's no. You know, just because you had an altar moment where some way, somehow your belly was full, you were well rested, the music was just right, and you came to this place of, okay, I'm going to give my life to Christ at the altar, but you continued in your iniquity for the next 30 years. I really have to seriously question your salvation. But it's not my job to question someone's salvation. But I can question your walk. If I'm not seeing the fruit of that walk, I don't know that I can call you a brother or a sister. If you continue to walk in that route of pride and self-exaltation and manipulation, it's not of God. So, there's a difference between a Christian who's struggling and a Christian who's just refusing to admit any of the error of their ways. One of the questions that we really have to ask is, can a narcissist be saved? And the answer to that is absolutely. Jesus came for the broken, the blind, the hard-hearted, every single last one of them. But that transformation is going to require repentance. So, yes, I think our hope always needs to be in, Lord, you can save them. If you saved a wretch like me, you could save them. So, now what happens is our prayer needs to now shift. Lord, give them a heart of repentance, a willingness to see themselves truthfully and surrender to your work. That's where our prayer now needs to shift. Not, Lord, get them to stop doing this, get them to stop doing that, get them out of here, move them on. Because if it is God's heart that none should perish, it should be our heart that none should perish. But all should come to repentance. So, that's where our prayer needs to be. So, yes, while there is hope, we're not mini-Jesuses. It's not going to happen. It's not our responsibility. Sometimes our responsibility is actually to step out of the way and allow them to suffer their own consequences, because that is what starts to bring a narcissist to themselves. Not always, but oftentimes. You know what it's reminding me of is the scripture in 1st or 2nd Corinthians, I can't remember, is when Paul commanded the young man who was sleeping with his stepmother to be cast out of the church, get rid of him, to send him out. And here's what he said, “Give him over to Satan for the destruction of his flesh.” So, it wasn't like, get rid of him. He's a piece of dirt. We don't want anything to do with him anymore. It's like, okay, if that's the lifestyle he wants to live, then let him live it. And let Satan have his way. So, his flesh is now destroyed. Not him as a person, but his flesh is destroyed. And that's really what narcissists are. They're very fleshly people. I want what I want when I want it, and I'm going to do whatever I can to get it. So, we really want to change our prayer to the Lord, lead them to repentance. Laura Dugger: (32:49 - 34:01) Updated website, thesavvysauce.com, so that you can have access to all the additional freebies we are offering, including all of our previous articles and all of our previous episodes, which now include transcriptions. You will be equipped to have your own practical chats for intentional living when you read all the recommended questions in the articles or gain insight from expert guests and past episodes as you read through the transcriptions. Because many people have shared with us that they want to take notes on previous episodes, or maybe their spouse prefers to read our conversations rather than listen to them or watch them now that we're offering video rather than just audio. So, we heard all of that, and we now have provided transcripts for all our episodes. Just visit thesavvysauce.com. All of this is conveniently located under the tab show notes on our website. Happy reading. Will you also share a few of the toxic tactics that narcissists typically use for power and control in relationships? Kris Reece: (34:02 - 36:33) Yes, actually one of their favorite ones is gaslighting. And I think it's just a word that is so overused and abused, but it is so accurate because it's not just lying, it is denying, it is distorting, and it is rewriting reality with the intention to make you doubt yourself, your memory, your feelings, or even your sanity. Tell me that's not wicked. I don't know what it is. It's manipulation at its finest. And the same with love bombing, which is another one of their tactics. At the start, or not even just at the start, maybe when they recognize that you've had enough, like that's it, I'm putting my foot down, I'm setting boundaries, sometimes they'll come in with that love bombing. And what they do is they start to overwhelm you with the affection and the attention and the promises and the chores and all those things that you've been just fighting for all those years. What they're looking to do is to recreate or recreate that emotional dependency, because it's not about love to them, it's about bait. So, in their mind, they're not going, oh no, I'm losing this relationship. Let me get my act together. It's, oh no, I'm losing control. Let me get him or her back into my clutches. So, those are two of the very common ones. Another one is projection. You want to know what a narcissist is doing? Listen to what they're accusing you of. That will tell you clearly what they've got going on. Lying, selfishness, anger, cheating, hiding, whatever it is, they want to put you on the defensive instead of facing their truth. So, what it does is it puts the spotlight on you and keeps it off them. So, those are some of the most common tactics that they're going to use. And it's on a spectrum. They will do it to different degrees. They'll do it in different ways to different relationships. But they're always going to do what has worked in the past. So, again, once your eyes start to open, now it becomes more difficult. And now their tactics start to change just a little bit. Remember, they're the alien. They're here. They've now got to figure this out. They're like, oh, this isn't working anymore. So, they're going to try to figure out what does work. And that's where you need to be very careful. Know them by their fruit. Fruit takes time to develop. Laura Dugger: (36:35 - 36:45) Okay. Even that term gaslighting, I think it can be hard to understand. Can you give an example of what that would look like in a relationship? Kris Reece: (36:46 - 37:50) Yeah, absolutely. So, you can go to, let's say, your spouse and you tell them, you know, when you said this to me, it really hurt my feelings. An obvious form of gaslighting could be, I never said that. You're misunderstanding me. Now, a lot of times people become savvy enough to have proof. No, no, no. You did say that. See, it's right here. Well, that's not what I meant. And you should know that. If you were a good Christian, you would know that that's not what I meant. You know that I get a little confused. You know that I mix up my words. And what they're doing is they're trying to distort your feelings instead of just owning. Wow. I didn't intend to make you feel that way, but I could see that it left an impact on you. They will skirt around all of that. They will make you question yourself. They will even deny, they will flat out deny that they said or did anything. Laura Dugger: (37:52 - 38:26) And I see where this gets so confusing for the person in relationship with them, because there's extra layers that you talk about and even extra tactics, like pathological lying that are added in there too. Yep. But they will flat out deny it. Yeah. Well, there's also a few more terms that I'd love for you to explain, just because they may come up throughout our conversation this week and next week. So, will you define codependency for us and also reactive abuse and trauma bond? Kris Reece: (38:27 - 43:41) Oh, absolutely. These are all very powerful and they are issues that can leave. I hate to use the word victim because we may be victimized, but if you're in Christ, you are not a victim. You have a hope and a future. God can meet you and do exceedingly abundantly above what you could ask, hope or think. But codependency, reactive abuse and trauma bonds are all very real and they often travel together. But they're different pieces of the same trap. So, when we look at codependency, this is where your sense of worth or peace now depends on someone else's mood or approval. It's like saying, if you're okay, I'm okay. If you're not okay, I'm not okay. So, I need you to be okay. Okay. And you start to manage other people's emotions instead of your own. And that's when we start to confuse enabling with loving because at the core of it, we want to feel okay and they're not okay. So, we have to get them okay. And that's where that caring now turns into control. So, now we get into reactive abuse. This is often very misunderstood because this happens a lot in churches. So, I want you to picture this. You have a married couple. Let's just say he is for the, just for the sake of our conversation. There are, there are a lot of female narcissists out there, but let's just say the male is the narcissist and he is gaslighting and he is abusive at home, but it's borderline. It's like, you know, he's a little insulting. He's a bit harsh. He's not loving. He's not nurturing. But boy, when he's at church, oh, he's everybody's pal. He's serving all the time. So, now when they go to counseling, they're sitting in front of the pastor, and she's got years and years and years of this abuse that has taken place. And she's now reacting to it. She's elevated. She's yelling, she's screaming, she's crying. And guess what happens? He's sitting there cool as a cucumber. I really don't understand. I mean, I know I've not been perfect and that's where the reactive abuse is taking place because she's now reacting to all of those years of manipulation and provocation and now questioning her own sanity because she knows what's going on. So, she's got that, what we refer to as cognitive dissonance going on. She's like, well, wait a minute, he's done this, saying this, this isn't making sense. I know I'm not losing it, but I feel like I'm losing it. And that's what's taking place. So, she just explodes because she has no idea what's going on. Her sanity is in question right now. So, to that pastor, guess who looks like the problem? She does. So, if you would just react a little bit more gently when he brings something to you, you may not have this problem. And if she's a Christian, she's going to go back and recognize the error of her ways, which that is a problem. You know, we are responsible for how we react, but she's owning now all of it. So, now let's take a step back. What is reactive abuse? It happens when you finally explode after those long periods of manipulation and provocation. The abuser then points to your reaction as the proof that you are the problem. And that keeps the guilt train going. The trauma bond is what happens with trauma bonds is they form when your brain gets hooked on the cycles of fear and relief. And we also go back to that cognitive dissonance. We're like, oh, wait a minute. Okay, he's this way one minute and he's this way another minute. So, is he good? Is he bad? I don't, I don't, instead of the brain being able to say, he's both, you've got both of this going on and we need to deal with this. We're trying to put either a bad blanket on it or a good blanket on it. So, we get hooked in these cycles in the relationship. And what we're chasing is that constant good time. Maybe we had a great time at the gala and he was so wonderful. He was even kind to me after we got in the car, and those small moments of kindness start to release the dopamine, and they convince you to stay even though the big picture is you're being hurt long term. It's like the frog in the boiling pot. They don't even realize it. But the good news, codependency, reactive abuse, and trauma bonds, once you recognize these patterns, you can begin to renew your mind, break the cycle and allow the Holy Spirit to retrain your heart towards peace instead of that counterfeit connection. Laura Dugger: (43:43 - 44:06) Wow. That is so well summed up. And if somebody is recognizing that they're in that cycle or if they're identifying they're in a relationship with a narcissist, do you have a practical first step as we're starting to wind down our time together today? Anything that they could do before they tune in next week? Kris Reece: (44:07 - 45:13) Absolutely. So, the first thing you're going to want to do is to release these feelings of shame and bringing this before God. Your time right now with the Lord can be precious and incredibly restorative. My hope would be that we take our focus off of them. Yes, I get it. We're starting to identify. We're recognizing. And all that can be very enlightening. But be careful not to fall into the enemy's trap of now overanalyzing, over fixing, over controlling. Take this before the Lord and say, “God, what are you trying to do in me?” Because for whatever reason, He's allowed this relationship. For whatever reason, He's not allowing you out of it. There's a lot of work that He's going to want to begin to do in you. And this is not to say this is your responsibility, but I promise you at the end of this road, if you walk this with Him, there will be a life that is beyond your imagination. Whether it's in the relationship or not, I'm not sure, but it will be beyond your imagination. Laura Dugger: (45:15 - 45:24) Thank you again for sharing the hope, Kris. And where can we go in between these weeks if we want to continue learning more from you? Kris Reece: (45:25 - 45:43) Oh, that'd be great. I would love if you'd jump on over to my website. It's krisreece.com. That's Kris with a K, Reece with a C. And you're going to find a wealth of content and resources, some of them free resources. And it's also where you can find my new book. It's called Breaking the Narcissist's Grip. Or you can just jump on Amazon for that as well. Laura Dugger: (45:44 - 46:01) Wonderful. We'll add links for all of that in the show notes for today's episode. And you're familiar that we're called The Savvy Sauce because savvy is synonymous with practical knowledge. And so, as my final question for you today, Kris, what is your savvy sauce? Kris Reece: (46:02 - 47:06) My savvy sauce is going to be very practical. I'm a really practical gal. And this may sound like a cliche, so I want you to kind of stick with me a little bit, but it has changed my life. And that is practicing the pause. In these difficult relationships, whether you were reactive before or not, you are now. And we want to begin to practice that pause because toxic people really want to dictate the emotional temperature of the conversation. So, before you respond, before you react, before you decide anything, just one pause. And you got to ask yourself this one question. This is what I do. I say, is this led by peace or pressure? And that question has saved me from countless toxic conversations and impulsive decisions. So, before you respond, pause, because peace is always going to tell you the truth faster than pressure ever will. Laura Dugger: (47:08 - 47:37) Well, so well said. I love that. And you are, I'm just so grateful that you were called to this work and that you did surrender to the Lord. Here I am. Send me with your book and the way that you're communicating today and all of these resources that you put together. I think a lot of people are going to find healing and hope. And that's my prayer as we conclude our time together. But I'm just very grateful for you, Kris. So, thank you for being my guest. Kris Reece: (47:37 - 47:41) Thank you. Thank you. It's been such a blessing and an honor. I am so appreciative. Laura Dugger: (47:43 - 51:25) One more thing before you go, have you heard the term gospel before? It simply means good news. And I want to share the best news with you, but it starts with the bad news. Every single one of us were born sinners, but Christ desires to rescue us from our sin, which is something we cannot do for ourselves. This means there's absolutely no chance we can make it to heaven on our own. So, for you and for me, it means we deserve death, and we can never pay back the sacrifice we owe to be saved. We need a savior, but God loved us so much. He made a way for his only son to willingly die in our place as the perfect substitute. This gives us hope of life forever in right relationship with him. That is good news. Jesus lived the perfect life. We could never live and died in our place for our sin. This was God's plan to make a way to reconcile with us so that God can look at us and see Jesus. We can be covered and justified through the work Jesus finished. If we choose to receive what he has done for us, Romans 10:9 says, “that if you confess with your mouth, Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved.” So, you pray with me now. Heavenly father, thank you for sending Jesus to take our place. I pray someone today right now is touched and chooses to turn their life over to you. Will you clearly guide them and help them take their next step in faith to declare you as Lord of their life? We trust you to work and change lives now for eternity. In Jesus name we pray. Amen. If you prayed that prayer, you are declaring him for me. So, me for him, you get the opportunity to live your life for him. And at this podcast, we're called The Savvy Sauce for a reason. We want to give you practical tools to implement the knowledge you have learned. So, you're ready to get started. First, tell someone, say it out loud, get a Bible. The first day I made this decision, my parents took me to Barnes and Noble and let me choose my own Bible. I selected the Quest NIV Bible and I love it. You can start by reading the book of John. Also get connected locally, which just means tell someone who's a part of a church in your community that you made a decision to follow Christ. I'm assuming they will be thrilled to talk with you about further steps such as going to church and getting connected to other believers to encourage you. We want to celebrate with you too. So, feel free to leave a comment for us here. If you did make a decision to follow Christ, we also have show notes included where you can read scripture that describes this process. And finally, be encouraged. Luke 15:10 says, “in the same way, I tell you, there is rejoicing in the presence of the angels of God over one sinner who repents.” The heavens are praising with you for your decision today. And if you've already received this good news, I pray you have someone to share it with. You are loved and I look forward to meeting you here next time.
Titus 3:3-8 NIV “At one time we too were foolish, disobedient, deceived and enslaved by all kinds of passions and pleasures. We lived in malice and envy, being hated and hating one another. But when the kindness and love of God our Savior appeared, he saved us, not because of righteous things we had done, but because of his mercy. He saved us through the washing of rebirth and renewal by the Holy Spirit, whom he poured out on us generously through Jesus Christ our Savior, so that, having been justified by his grace, we might become heirs having the hope of eternal life. This is a trustworthy saying. And I want you to stress these things, so that those who have trusted in God may be careful to devote themselves to doing what is good. These things are excellent and profitable for everyone.” *Transcription Below* Hunter Beless is an author of several children's books including Read It, See It, Say It, Sing It! and Amy Carmichael: The Brown-Eyed Girl Who Learned to Pray. She is also a Bible teacher, co-author of Titus: Displaying the Gospel of Grace and the founder of Journeywomen Ministries, which empowers women to live out their faith through deep commitment to their local church. Hunter hosts the Journeywomen Podcast, sharing resources and insightful conversations with women of faith. She and her husband, Brooks, have four beautiful children, whom Hunter homeschools. You can find her on Instagram @hunterbeless, or at https://www.hunterbeless.com/books. Journeywomen Podcast Thank You to Our Sponsor: The Sue Neihouser Team Connect with The Savvy Sauce on Facebook or Instagram or Our Website Please help us out by sharing this episode with a friend, leaving a 5-star rating and review, and subscribing to this podcast! Questions and Topics We Cover: 1. What rhythms have been most profitable to you (spiritually, relationally, physically, and productively?) 2. In your own home, how have you intentionally helped your children know and love God through Scripture? 3. How is the Gospel useful for not only salvation, but also sanctification? Similar Episodes from The Savvy Sauce: 16 Reflecting Jesus in Our Relationships with Rach Kincaid 57 Implementing Bite-Size Habits That Will Change Your Life with Author, Blogger, Podcaster, and Speaker, Kat Lee 150 Brain Science and Spiritual Abundance with Ken Baugh 166 Journey from Empty to Well Nourished Soul with Gretchen Saffles 207 Cultivating Character in Our Children with Cynthia Yanof Special Patreon Release Wholehearted Quiet Time with Naomi Vacaro 267 Apologetics with Ray Comfort 274 Holy Spirit Stories and Fruit and Ways to Identify His Guidance in Our Lives with Margaret Feinberg Gospel Scripture: (all NIV) Romans 3:23 “for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God,” Romans 3:24 “and are justified freely by his grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus.” Romans 3:25 (a) “God presented him as a sacrifice of atonement, through faith in his blood.” Hebrews 9:22 (b) “without the shedding of blood there is no forgiveness.” Romans 5:8 “But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” Romans 5:11 “Not only is this so, but we also rejoice in God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have now received reconciliation.” John 3:16 “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.” Romans 10:9 “That if you confess with your mouth, “Jesus is Lord,” and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved.” Luke 15:10 says “In the same way, I tell you, there is rejoicing in the presence of the angels of God over one sinner who repents.” Romans 8:1 “Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus” Ephesians 1:13–14 “And you also were included in Christ when you heard the word of truth, the gospel of your salvation. Having believed, you were marked in him with a seal, the promised Holy Spirit, who is a deposit guaranteeing our inheritance until the redemption of those who are God's possession- to the praise of his glory.” Ephesians 1:15–23 “For this reason, ever since I heard about your faith in the Lord Jesus and your love for all the saints, I have not stopped giving thanks for you, remembering you in my prayers. I keep asking that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the glorious Father, may give you the spirit of wisdom and revelation, so that you may know him better. I pray also that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you, the riches of his glorious inheritance in the saints, and his incomparably great power for us who believe. That power is like the working of his mighty strength, which he exerted in Christ when he raised him from the dead and seated him at his right hand in the heavenly realms, far above all rule and authority, power and dominion, and every title that can be given, not only in the present age but also in the one to come. And God placed all things under his feet and appointed him to be head over everything for the church, which is his body, the fullness of him who fills everything in every way.” Ephesians 2:8–10 “For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith – and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God – not by works, so that no one can boast. For we are God‘s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.“ Ephesians 2:13 “But now in Christ Jesus you who once were far away have been brought near through the blood of Christ.“ Philippians 1:6 “being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.” *Transcription* Music: (0:00 – 0:11) Laura Dugger: (0:12 - 1:16) Welcome to The Savvy Sauce, where we have practical chats for intentional living. I'm your host, Laura Dugger, and I'm so glad you're here. Thank you to the Sue Neihouser Team for sponsoring this episode. If you're looking to buy or sell a home this season, make sure you reach out to Sue at 309-229-8831. Sue would love to walk alongside you as you unlock new doors. My guest for today is Hunter Beless, and you may recognize her as the founder of Journey Women Ministries. She's also a podcaster and an author of multiple books, including this recent one, Jesus Loves You More. Hunter is going to share today about all things discipleship. Here's our chat. Welcome to The Savvy Sauce, Hunter. Hunter Beless: (1:17 - 1:23) Thank you so, much for having me. I just love the concept of this show, and I'm excited to be here with you today. Laura Dugger: (1:23 - 1:56) Well, I've been looking so, forward to getting to chat with you. You've been on my list for years, so, I'm thankful this worked out. And even, it may have been years ago, but I heard you publicly share that you had chosen to put your faith in Christ in elementary school, I believe. But then as you transitioned into high school, you were open about then choosing to pursue the ways of the world. So, will you just speak to that experience and talk to that teenage girl who's currently facing some similar temptations? Hunter Beless: (1:56 - 6:39) Oh, that'd be such a privilege to get to speak to any young woman who is in a situation like this. I often think, like, if I would have just had one older friend who was encouraging me in the Lord, who would be willing to testify to God's grace in her life, and who would reach back and try and help me just to continue walking in the grace that he had extended to me through his son, like, I wonder if it would have gone differently for me, Laura. But, you know, the Lord did save me at a young age, and I lived fervently for him, loved God's word, even from a young age. And I remember, like, seeing groups of people that I wanted to like me, and wanting so, desperately to be accepted by them. But knowing that when I opened the pages of scripture, the Holy Spirit brought conviction to my heart in a way that would not allow me to act in accordance with the things that these groups were doing, in order to be approved of by them. And so, I thought to myself, "Well, maybe I'll just stop reading my Bible so, much." This is about eighth or ninth grade. And, you know, then I won't feel a sense of conviction when it comes to, like, these behaviors that I know I need to, you know, adapt to, in order to be approved of by the people that I deemed, you know, significant. And so, I set my Bible aside. And it's a really sad story. I mean, as I continued to spend time outside of God's word, I would still go to church with my family and things like that on Sunday mornings. But I just began to look less and less like a follower of Christ, and more and more like the world. And eventually, you know, I spent my entire duration of my high school years doing that. And I have to tell you; I just went back to my 20-year high school reunion. And there was a girl that I saw there. And she told me what a jerk I was in that season of my life. And it was such a wonderful thing to be reminded of what it looks like for me to not be walking in the Spirit, but to be walking in the flesh. And to really have to reckon with, that is what it looks like to be walking like the world. And I just told her, I said, "You know what, you're completely right." I said, "I was." I was totally looking out for my good and not for the good of others. I was absolutely living for myself and not for the Lord. But by God's grace, when it came time for my senior year of high school, he allowed me to get to the end of myself. And you would have thought, like, looking back, I had the resume, I had the 4.0, I had the salutatorian status, I was the president of my high school senior class. You would have thought, this girl's crushing it. But I had never been more anxious, more depressed, more insecure, more selfish, obviously, as testified to by the girl that I just referenced, than I was in that season of my life. And I remember I had a youth pastor who had just come into our church. And he said, "Hey," he said, "How's your time in the word looking?" And I said, "Well, I could either lie, or I could tell the truth." And I said, "You know, it's looking pretty, pretty bleak." And he said, "I just want to challenge you to get back in God's word." And at the same time, my dad had a tragic accident. It was a near death accident. And I was kind of reckoned with the brevity of life as a senior in high school. And I cried out to the Lord. And I said, "God, if you really are who you say you are, would you show me who you are through your word?" And that sparked, Laura, this passion for God's word. And it allowed me then to see the difference in my own life, what it looks like for Hunter to be walking without listening to the voice of God, and what it looked like for Hunter to have her face in her Bible, and to seek to live by God's word. And I tell you what, I probably don't look nearly as impressive by the world's standards. But the joy and the peace, and really just the transformation that the Lord has accomplished in my life through his word, is something that I cannot stop testifying to. And I just cannot encourage women enough, like if you are wrestling with the flesh, to get into God's word, because God works by the power of the Holy Spirit through his word in the lives of his people. And so, that's why really this whole passion has just overtaken my life for God's word. Laura Dugger: (6:40 - 6:59) Wow, that is incredible to hear that transformation, because God did it, and God can do it again. And God can do it for each one of us listening. But you are so passionate about discipling others. Can you first tell us, what were some of the significant ways that you've been discipled? Hunter Beless: (7:00 - 10:07) Yeah, well, I went to college, and that was the first time that I had ever really had someone seeking to do spiritual good in my life, outside of my parents. And really, even with my parents, like, you know, sitting down intentionally studying the word, that wasn't a part of our family culture. And so, when I went to college, there was a girl, her name was Meredith. And I remember, she sat down, and she taught me how to read my Bible, for really the very first time. I remember being confronted with some of the truths of scripture, Laura, and I'm like, "That's in the Bible? That disrupts me. Like, I didn't know that, you know?" And so, it was such a wonderful time, just of really kind of being confronted with my own theological ideas from my, you know, lack of ability and time to really understand the message of the text, you know, and then to really reevaluate that and be conformed to the text and to allow it to conform me. So, Meredith had a significant influence in my life in how to study the Bible. And then I had an older woman named Joyce, who at the time, I believe, was in her late 40s, maybe early 50s. And I just remember, Joyce found out that I began to memorize scripture. So, somewhere along the way, I realized, like, this book is so, significant that I need to start, you know, hiding scripture away in my heart. Some of that was just watching my own grandmother and seeing the way that the Lord had used scripture in her own life. And realizing, like, wow, if my grandmother has these truths hidden away in her heart for this season, and she had dementia, I need to start hiding scripture away in my heart, too. So, Joyce and I really, we started up a group on scripture memory. And I'll never forget the first time I met her, she said, "Hey, I heard you're starting to memorize Ephesians." I never finished. But she said, "Let's hear it." And so, she just opened up her Bible. And I just started quoting Ephesians. And one of Joyce's coined phrases that at the time I didn't realize was actually scripture itself, she would hold the Bible out in front of me. And she would say, "Hunter, this is no empty word for you, but your very life." And she had so many phrases like that, that I didn't even realize at the time, because I was pretty biblically illiterate, that were the words of scripture themselves. That's Deuteronomy 32:47. And Joyce really embodied that message for me, that scripture is that man doesn't live by bread alone, but by every word that comes from the mouth of God. And so, watching her just live with her face in her Bible, proverbially speaking, and seeking to meditate on its truths and live by those day in and day out really transformed who I am even today. And she gave me a picture of what I'd like to look like years down the road. So, I've had various mentors, but those are some of the first. And the Lord definitely used them in significant ways to do spiritual good in my life. Laura Dugger: (10:08 - 10:36) And I don't know what kind of life those women lead if they're in public or more private disciplines, but their faithfulness, you just see the impact how it ripples out to bless generations. And even you, Hunter, you're leading this incredible ministry, where you disciple others through helping women know and love God through his word. So, will you share how you ended up getting to do this awesome work that you get to do today? Hunter Beless: (10:37 - 15:41) Oh, well, the beginnings of this, you would not have thought were awesome. And in fact, you and I were just chatting, and I still am recording out of my closet. And really, it's all just been an overflow of what the Lord has been doing in my own life. And I did feel like along the way, I just, I began to just love learning from older women. And I do think that's a biblical, like scriptural kind of practice. You look at Titus 2, you see the older women are to teach the younger women what is good. I was a younger woman who loved learning from older women. And so, I had this, over the years, this just long list of women who had invested in me who had, you know, testified to God's grace in their life, who had taught me the scriptures. And when my husband Brooks and I were in the military, we found ourselves on post. And just due to the transiency of a military lifestyle, the churches around military installations tend to be a little bit tired, sometimes depleted, because people in the military are moving so, frequently. So, it's hard, right, to have continuity to see people through in their discipling process and all of that. And so, I really missed those mentors that I'd had from college, and the year after college, after coming into marriage. And so, I thought to myself, like, man, I want the other women. I was also interfacing with either believers or non-believers who really had never been discipled. And I thought, man, I just wish I could get you with Joyce, or I wish I could get you with Meredith. I wish I could connect you, you know, with X, Y, or Z woman from the past couple of years. And so, I thought, I also simultaneously was listening to a lot of podcasts because I was super lonely. Just because, you know, moving into a new culture, and then my husband was gone at least 50% of the time for training or deployment. And so, I'd be walking along the military installation listening to like sermon audio, like John Piper or Timothy Keller or whatever. And I thought, man, I wish that there was a conversational podcast about theology for women that would just be more warm and kind of like what we're doing right now. And my husband was like, "Well, you should start it." And so, I just started with the women who had mentored me. If you go back to the very beginning of the podcast, it's truly like my college roommates. It's my mentors from Pine Cove Christian Camps where Brooks and I met. And I think I just by God's grace, the podcasting network was so, small at the time. I remember Journey Women landed in the number two spot right behind Joel Osteen whenever the thing launched. And so, then from there, it just gave the podcast some notoriety, which is what then allowed, you know, some of the names that you would recognize to reach out and to say, "Hey, you know, could we come on the podcast?" And at the time, I had no knowledge of, you know, how to market people marketing books or any of that Bible studies, etc. And yeah, it was a really fun season, actually, because it was pre-COVID. And you know, people weren't used to doing a whole lot online. And so, had some really, really fun conversations. And along the way, the Lord has helped me to hone in more of a vision of what I'm doing. Because at first, it was just like, let's get in the closet and have like fun, intentional conversations that I could share with my girlfriends or with maybe the military spouse that I'm meeting on the playground that I may never see again, you know. And then along the way, people started even wanting to donate to the podcast and different things like that. And I thought, I really need to have a clearer aim. And so, now, you know, over the past eight years, the Lord has given us this mission to help women know and love God through his word, to find their hope in the gospel and to invest deeply in their local churches as they go out on mission for the glory of God. And some of that came and Laura, I'm sure you face this from women really seeking out discipling online, and us realizing we can't disciple you. Like, we cannot come alongside you and help you to grow in godliness, you know, but we can do that via the interwebs. But the degree to which we're able to do that is super-duper limited. And so, what does it look like for us then to equip women so, that then they would be encouraged to seek out fellowship in the local church, and to be investing their time, energy and talents in the local church. And so, that's become kind of our resounding gong at Journey Women over the years, just because we really do believe that ministry happens best in the context of the local church. And that's something that the Lord has validated through seeing women reaching out online and realizing like, hey, we could never, you know, provide what they need. But God in his grace has given us the local body that is able to do that. Laura Dugger: (15:42 - 19:08) So, well said, because this is a great place that we can meet people anytime what is most convenient for them with a podcast. But then also, so, that's great for sowing seeds. But there's nothing that replaces that embodied relationship. And it just makes me think of God that he created us that way. And he knew it because Jesus even being embodied, little baby sent to earth, so, nothing replaces that. And, Hunter, I just I love hearing about your public ministry and the way the Lord has blessed and grown it. And now a brief message from our sponsor. With over 28 years of experience in real estate, Sue Neihouser of the Sue Neihouser Team is a RE/MAX agent of Central Illinois, and she loves to walk alongside her clients as they unlock new doors. For anyone local, I highly recommend you call Sue today at 309-229-8831. And you can ask her any real estate questions. Sue lives in Central Illinois and loves this community and all that it has to offer. When unlocking new doors with her clients, Sue works hard to gain a depth of understanding of their motivations and dreams and interests in buying and selling their home. And then she commits to extensive market research that will give them confidence in their decision. Sue truly cares for each of her clients and the relationship she forms with each family along the entire home buying or selling process. This was absolutely our experience when we worked with Sue and her team. The house that we desired at the time was actually not even on the market, but Sue had a connection and was able to ask those homeowners if they would be willing to sell. She was timely in her response as she walked us through this whole process, and she helped us sell our home with the right offer coming in hours after it was listed. We kept saying she's thought of everything. And Sue's continued generosity was astonishing. I remember one afternoon after we had settled into our new home, and she was knocking on the door dropping off a goodie bag for our family that came from the local bakery. Our daughters also loved getting to know Miss Sue as she assisted us in finding truly our dream home. So, whether you're looking to buy a home for the first time, or looking to upgrade or downsize, or making the big decision to move to an assisted living from your home of many years, Sue will be there to help you navigate the big emotions and ensure the process is smooth and stress free, and that the new doors to be unlocked are ready and waiting for more memories to be made. So, call her today at 309-229-8831 or visit her website at sueneihouser.com. And that is sueneihouser.com. Thanks for your sponsorship. I'd also love to hear a little bit more about your personal life. So, what does a day in the life look like for Hunter Beless? Hunter Beless: (19:09 - 21:25) Well, I think if somebody joined me in a day in a life, in this season, Laura, I feel like I'm too busy. I have committed to too much. And so, what it looks like practically, it's going to be a lot of time running from this or that event and just trying to do the things that I committed to before or some of the other things that the Lord has allowed in my life came to fruition. But just leaning into him for the grace that I need moment by moment, you know, and trusting that he is the same and that he has provided all of the grace that I need. His grace is sufficient for me, you know, as I'm running errands and facing the temptation to feel anxious or overwhelmed that, you know, I think it's Luke 12, where it's talking about how I can't even add a moment, not even the smallest amount of time to my life by worrying. So, I'm just going to entrust all of this to the Lord. So, for me, I wonder how many women are listening to this and that they can relate to this because I talked to various people who they don't have a podcast, but they don't have the same work as me, but they feel that same temptation towards anxiety and the feelings of overwhelms that we all face, you know, and yeah, I think my life probably looks a lot like many of y'all's. And for me, it's just the constant meditation on scripture and just rehearsing the truths of God's word that are never changing, even in the midst of my ever-changing and chaotic circumstances. So, it doesn't seem to change even if I do a better job, which I could have done, planning my schedule or, you know, prayerfully considering the commitments that I made, but just resting and knowing that he is unchanging and that he is ever-present and that he is all-knowing and that he has provided everything that I need and his son. So, that is what it looks like. Every day looks different, but again, leaning into the truths of God's word, meditating on those truths, rehearsing those truths over and over, and resting in the grace that the gospel provides. That's the thing that never changes. Laura Dugger: (21:27 - 22:06) And I love that overview because if we look from the outside, you're homeschooling, you run this ministry, you have a podcast, and you're cooking healthy recipes for your family, but I'm sure do you also have weekly patterns? Because to me, it's a stewardship issue. You've been faithful with little, it sounds like, so, he has given you the opportunity to be faithful in much, and it's a season of much where you've written books and produced all this content. So, do you have a system in place or rhythms throughout the week that have helped you live that full, abundant life? Hunter Beless: (22:06 - 24:19) Yeah, that's a really good question. Obviously, the weekly rhythm that we always start with is worshiping with the saints on Sunday. I look forward to that like no other. And we are in a church that the Lord is just so, gracious to have provided a pastor who prioritizes the preaching of the word and who is consistently proclaiming the gospel from the pulpit. And so, Laura, on the weeks where I feel like I have been so, busy that I have not spent the time in God's word that I would desire, just the recognition that going to church on a Sunday is such a blessing to get to receive God's word. And so, there have been many times that I just show up and I'm just like, "Thank you, Lord." Thank you for the provision of your word. Thank you for the provision of the body of Christ. And so, Sundays are just like a non-negotiable for us. We go to church on Sundays. And then, you know, we have various things. My kids are actually homeschooled on two days out of the week or three days out of the week. And then, they go to school two days. So, we do like a university model is what it's called. And so, on the three days that they are home, I am full tilt homeschooling, doing everything home-related. And in fact, I have had to learn that part of their education is also helping care for our home. And so, we really see it as a team effort to keep the home, like, tidy and running and functioning well, so that we can, you know, spend as much time in it as we do, like, with happy hearts. And then, on Tuesdays and Thursdays, I typically am in this closet working while the children are at school. Saturdays, we rest together as a family. We spend a lot of time outdoors. I also make bread regularly. And I think there's something liturgical for me about making bread. And, like, when everything else feels, like, a little bit chaotic and out of my control, the beauty of just doing a simple task like making bread to provide food for my family and nourishment is something that really brings me great joy. So, Saturdays are also bread-making days. And then, the week begins again. That is awesome. Laura Dugger: (24:19 - 24:41) I love hearing that. And it makes me curious to go even a little bit further. I'll give you a few categories, but I'd love to hear what rhythms in these categories have been most profitable to you. So, when you think of it spiritually, physically, relationally, and just productively, how you stay creatively fresh. Hunter Beless: (24:41 - 28:24) Yeah. You know, spiritually for me, and I'm a mother of, like, young children, right? So, my kids are ranging from age 11 to age 3. I would say we're still in a season in which sleep is a little bit unpredictable, particularly in those early waking hours. But I do my very best to try and get in God's Word first. And that is not because I want to check it off the list, but because I need the people in my home and beyond. So, really trying to just orient myself rightly to the truths of God's Word first thing is huge. I also do try to work out. So, that gets to the physical piece. I neglected working out for many years. I actually, hilariously, was a personal trainer when we were back in the military. And that was kind of my gig while Brooks was gone. And so, I know how to work out, and I enjoy working out. But with the children, it has been a difficult thing for me to prioritize. But just this last year, I got, this is the most, like, basic thing ever. I got a Peloton. I bought it secondhand off of Marketplace. And it has just been a wonderful way for me to sweat and exercise my body first thing in the morning without, you know, really requiring a whole lot. I don't have to leave the house. I don't have to go outside or anything, because Brooks does travel quite a bit still for work. And so, I try to ride the Peloton. Doesn't always happen. Happens less than it does, than I want for it to, but it does help. And then, yeah, relationally is really, that's a really good question. I think one thing that the Lord has blessed me with, having lived a season of extreme transiency, right? So, we did eight years of military. And then, we did two years at, you know, university where Brooks got his MBA. And now, we're in our first, like, what we would call, like, a civilian kind of location, where he's got his first civilian job. We're almost 15 years deep into marriage now. And so, all of the friendships that I made along those eight years of moving almost annually. I think we moved, like, six or seven times in eight years. Yeah, just trying to maintain those relationships. I only have one or two from each duty station, but I love using Voxer or Voice Memo to keep in touch with people who have known me for, you know, a longer time. And that's just one thing that's really fun. I have to be careful not to let that overtake my time on my phone, but I do love to keep in touch with old friends. And they are some of the friends that the Lord has used just really to help me navigate the various challenges that we face, right, in life and relationally in marriage and all of that. So, anyways, and relationally in marriage, Brooks and I were really just relishing in the friendship that God has given us with one another. I don't think it's been easy over the years, especially with all of the transiency and all of the deployments and all of the many moves that we've faced. But God has really just given us a true appreciation for one another. And to begin to see now, 15 years into marriage, that the differences that He has given each of us are a gift to help us be conformed into the image of His Son. So, that's some of it, spiritually, physically, relationally. Did I miss anything? Laura Dugger: (28:25 - 28:32) Just even productively as you're creating content, how do you stay creatively inspired and fresh? Hunter Beless: (28:33 - 30:55) Yeah, I love, my friend Gretchen Stoffels has a lot of wonderful things to say about this. She talks a lot about producing from the overflow and not the undertow. And that's ministered to me over the years. I find a lot of times when I am not creatively fresh, it's either because I'm overproducing or because I'm not honestly spending, most of what I do is all revolving around God's Word. So, it's like if I'm not spending time in God's Word and allowing myself to just be struck anew with truths from the text, then what do I have to share? So, that helps me too in knowing when am I overcommitted? Because if I don't have time then to be relishing in God's Word, not for the sake of producing something, but just like you said, just being struck and wonder by who God is, then I really need to reevaluate the commitments that I'm making and slow things down a bit. And so, that's kind of what has helped me to protect that time with the Lord so that then I would have something to offer others. And I don't just think about it in terms of producing a podcast or writing a book or sending out a newsletter. I mean, honestly, even with the children, this has been something that I've been thinking about for the last six to eight months. If I want them to understand how God's Word informs all of life, then I need to be with my face in my Bible because who is it that they spend the most time with, right? All throughout their life. Like, it's me. And so, I get to then help them realize like, oh, here is how Scripture applies to all these different circumstances. But if I don't spend time in God's Word, then I've got nothing to give. And I have a friend who was a missionary actually in a remote country with the IMB. And I asked her, I said, "How did you ever evangelize with people in this remote context from this different religion and all of this?" And she said, "You know what, I just had to be so, filled up with God's Word that that's what came out." And I think about that all the time. So, when I'm feeling dry, I'm like, "Oop, oop, that's a good sign. I need to go back to God's Word." Laura Dugger: (30:56 - 31:07) I love that. And let's go there then in your own home. How have you intentionally helped your children to know and to love God through Scripture? Hunter Beless: (31:09 - 33:52) This is going to sound really selfish, but, you know, this whole endeavor, right, I've realized the significance of God's Word in my own life. And so, I'm constantly thinking, Laura, like, how am I going to get into God's Word? You know, like, that's, it sounds selfish. But if I really believe that I need God's Word for all of life, I'm going to have to figure out how am I going to get that in. And then it's wonderful because I get to bring the children along in that. So, maybe that's just like a fresh take on it, right? Because we're always thinking as mothers, like, how can we be investing in our children more heavily in all of these things? And I think those are good and right desires. Obviously, Deuteronomy speaks to that. You know, we're supposed to teach our children diligently the ways of the Lord. But I think it's just so refreshing when we come to the text as learners, as co-learners. And so, for me, I'm just always thinking, like, how can we learn together who God's Word is? How can we worship the Lord together in our home? And then it helps me see those times, right, when you are offering instruction to the children, when you are being intentional about, you know, for us, we do, like, catechesis, for example, which is a series of questions and answers just to help disseminate doctrinal truths and help the children learn, like, here are, you know, foundational doctrine of the Christian faith. Then I'm not just like, "Okay, who is God? You know, God is the Spirit." I'm, like, thinking about the things that we're learning in a way where I also am seeking to learn as well. And I think that just gives a posture of humility, too. Like, as a parent, where it's not like, "You gotta learn your Bible verse this week, kid." You know, it's like, "We get to, we get to, look, we get to learn God's Word together, you know?" And then that helps them understand the joy of learning God's Word. And it also gives them a very real picture of a parent who's being transformed by the truths of God's Word. What better witness is there? And so, really, I've stopped seeing it as, "Hey, here's our time," you know, which we do have. And practically, for us, a lot of that happens around the table because I've realized that, like, when children are well-fed, when they have something to do with their hands, they may be a little bit more prone to, like, have open ears, ready to hear, you know, instruction. But we do have those rhythms kind of in place, but I don't want it to be relegated to those rhythms. I want it to be all of life. I want us to understand it doesn't just mean we're gonna sit here over breakfast and do our Bible reading for the day. This is something that is really going with us through the day because we need it not just for this moment, but for all of life. Laura Dugger: (33:53 - 35:38) You draw so much wisdom there, and I think especially that it's not an either-or, having that set-aside rhythm and time, or just hoping it'll be incorporated into all of life. But it's both. I want to make sure that you're up to date with our latest news. We have a new website. You can visit thesavvysauce.com and see all of the latest updates. You may remember Francie Henrichsen from Episode 132, where we talked about pursuing our God-given dreams. She is the amazing businesswoman who has carefully designed a brand-new website for Savvy Sauce Charities, and we are thrilled with the final product, so, I hope you check it out. There you're going to find all of our podcasts, now with show notes and transcriptions listed, a scrapbook of various previous guests, and an easy place to join our email list to receive monthly encouragement and questions to ask your loved ones, so, that you can have your own practical chats for intentional living. You will also be able to access our donation button, or our mailing address, for sending checks that are tax-deductible, so, that you can support the work of Savvy Sauce Charities and help us continue to reach the nations with the good news of Jesus Christ. So, make sure you visit thesavvysauce.com today. Even going back to the heart of this conversation of discipleship, Hunter, how do you think the local church, and especially older women in the community, can play a vital role in encouraging young people to love Scripture? Hunter Beless: (35:40 - 39:34) You know, I love this question, and I just, I cannot overemphasize the value of older women who love God's Word in the church enough. You know, I think in the culture, we're hearing and seeing that, you know, it's not good to grow old. I mean, that's being perpetuated by all of the Instagram ads that we receive, and by seeing shiny faces that look like they haven't aged one bit. And I'm like, "No, God's Word says that women, older women in particular, have tremendous value in the family of God." And so, I think I want older women just to realize, like, we need you. And in fact, no one is exempt. No woman is exempt from the Titus 2 mandate to teach the younger women what is good. And how do we know what's good? Well, we know God alone is good. And because God is good, we know His Word is good. And if you don't have any clue, like how to reach back and invest in the next generation, I have great news for you. All you need is God's Word. So, I mean, the littlest learners, the children in the community, I think they are the most gracious recipients of anybody in our community, you know, just when it comes to God's Word. And so, look for ways that you can encourage the younger people in your sphere of influence, in your local church, with God's Word. And often I think that just starts with maybe even meditating on one verse. You know, it can be that simple. Or for me, one way that I want to encourage, you know, the children in my life with God's Word is by identifying ways that I see God working in their lives and naming it. I mean, how encouraging would that be if an older saint in the church said, "Hey, you know, I don't know, my oldest daughter's name is Hadley. Hey, Hadley, like, I see God working in you. You are showing kindness, you know, to the other children in the church. Thank you so much for that. And I'm just praising God for the work he's doing in your life," you know. But I think in order for them to do that, right, they have to be willing to be inconvenienced by being around the children. And we just had a sermon on this, a wonderful sermon from the book of Mark about Jesus saying, "Let the little children come to me." And so, I think just realizing that Jesus himself, right, he was unbothered. He delighted in the presence of children. So, I think in our older age, you know, especially after you have young kids and you've done all of your time, you know, investing in the next generation in that way, just realizing that there is value in serving in kids' ministry or children's ministry in the church and just getting around the children to be able to give yourself the opportunity to know them in a way where you can meet them with the truths of God's Word. It could also be just having younger families in your home. And I know that can be such an inconvenience. I mean, we're a hot mess. We are so chaotic. And I know, you know, you even have to consider the breakables. Like, you got to protect those, you know, when we come into the house. But figure out, like, what does hospitality look like where we can welcome in younger children, the families with younger children in the home, seek to encourage the parents. I mean, truly, Laura, what else are we doing here? Like, we have been given two things. We have been given the mission of evangelizing and discipling. And that message is the same. At the heart of both of those things is the gospel. The gospel is for salvation and for sanctification. And so, if you're an older person in the church, keep meditating on the gospel. Keep, you know, seeking to disseminate the truths of the gospel to everybody around you. And remember, the littlest of these, I think, are the most eager learners. And it's such a great opportunity. Laura Dugger: (39:36 - 39:52) Goodness, I love that. And as you say, disseminate these truths of the gospel for both salvation and sanctification. Can you even share clearly what is that gospel that applies to everyone? Hunter Beless: (39:53 - 43:58) Oh, yes. I mean, this is the good news that I continually am rehearsing over and over and over again. I think for me, you know, I realized as a young child that the gospel was for salvation, right? That I love the Titus 3. You know, I just wrote this Bible study on Titus with Courtney Docter. If you don't have, like, a great comprehensive kind of gospel text that you've got in your back pocket, I think Titus 3:3-7 is a wonderful text to commit to memory. It says, "So, we are sinners." Romans 3:23. You know, we were created by God to glorify him. And yet, we have chosen to glorify ourselves. Romans 3:23 says, "For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God." So, we too were once foolish. I think it's easy to see that when you really think about your life. You know, like, even me testifying to my life in high school. We too were once foolish. There's no getting around that. But we too, let me see, where am I now? "But when the goodness and loving kindness of God our Savior appeared, he saved us," "not because of works done by us in righteousness, but according to his own mercy," So, how does he save us? Well, he sent his son, Jesus. When did the kindness of God our Savior appear? Well, it appeared over 2,000 years ago. In a stable in Bethlehem. When, like you said, God sent his son to live a perfect life. And then he gave his life on the cross so, that we might have right relationship with God. He saved us. Not by works of righteousness, but according to his mercy, "By the washing of regeneration and renewal of the Holy Spirit." So, when, and by the way, he rose from the grave. Let's see, is that in here? I don't know. But let's see. That one's not in this particular gospel text of Titus 3:3-7. But we know that from the gospels, right? That Jesus Christ died on the cross. And that he rose again three days later. Overcoming death. So, that we too might not have to experience eternal death. We get to experience eternal life. When we turn from our sin and trust in him. And that's when that washing of regeneration and renewal by the Holy Spirit happens. We're filled with the spirit. He's poured out his spirit on us. Verses 6 and 7 says, "whom he poured out on us richly through Jesus Christ our Savior, so that being justified by his grace we might become heirs according to the hope of eternal life." And so, I think part of what it looks like for us to live with that hope of eternal life. Is to constantly be reflecting upon who we were apart from Christ. Who we are in Christ. And who we will be when we one day see Christ again. Face to face. And so, that for me is what it looks like. Just to relish in the gospel. To remember the gospel. Even when I was talking earlier, Laura, about feeling overwhelmed. The temptation for me then is to feel down on myself. And to wrestle with shame. Because I've over committed, right? But I'm rehearsing the truths of the gospel to myself in that moment. And saying, "Okay. Yes, could I have planned my schedule better? Yes, could I have done all these things? But you know what? I, by God's grace, get instead to rest in the grace that the gospel provides for me in this moment. Knowing that with all these various responsibilities, I am not going to be executing them perfectly. But he has perfectly accomplished my salvation on the cross. And so, I can rest in his son. Knowing that my salvation is not based on my perfect performance. But on the performance of Christ." And that then again helps me then to relish in the gospel. To remember the gospel, like I said, is not just for that moment of salvation or justification. When we're saved from our sins and made right with God. But it's also for every moment of every day. Because we need it all the time. At least I do. Laura Dugger: (44:00 - 44:20) Yes, absolutely. And I think we can hear that or repeat that so, often. But I love how you unpack it. Because especially for those who have been saved. When they rely on the gospel for sanctification. Can you give any more examples of what that looks like? Specifically for sanctification after the salvation? Hunter Beless: (44:21 - 46:35) Yeah. I think it's just coming to a greater understanding of our desperate need for Jesus. And then as we rely on him more wholly. I think we're conformed even more into the image of his son. Just after that gospel hymn in Titus 3. Verse 8 says, "The saying is trustworthy, and I want you to insist on these things, so that those who have believed in God may be careful to devote themselves to good works." So, what is sanctification? Well, sanctification is growing in godliness. Or said another way, it's growing in good works. Right? So, we're not saved because of our good works. We're saved by the gospel so, that then we can produce good works. By God's grace. That's the sanctification process. And so, how does that happen? Well, verse 8 tells us, "The saying is trustworthy, and I want you to insist on these things." What does it want us to insist on? It wants us to insist then on the contents of the gospel from Titus 3:3-7. So, we need to, in order to grow in our ability to do good to others. What do we do? We insist on the gospel. And how does that work? Well, when I am feeling, again, overbooked, overwhelmed. And somebody comes into my life that needs service. If I'm functioning by the world's wisdom, what am I going to say? "You know what? I just don't have the margin for that. I can't do that. I need to protect my time." But if I'm looking at the gospel, what do I see? Well, I see what Christ died for me. Was that act of service self-protective in any way? No. So, what does it look like for me then to lay down my life for the good of another? And that's how the gospel then informs our living in such a way that we begin to grow by God's grace, not by our own effort, in godliness. So, I think that's how the sanctification process kind of works itself out. Laura Dugger: (46:35 - 46:54) Thank you so much for sharing that. And you've taught us already so, much in this time together. But you've also written a book recently for children. Can you tell us a little bit more about it and share the lasting truths that you want to impart to children who get to read or listen to your book? Hunter Beless: (46:55 - 49:47) Yeah. I think it started for me with really thinking about what are those kinds of scriptural, biblical truths that I want to offer to the children in these everyday moments like we've been talking about. My son, I already shared, he's been struggling with sleep for the last year or so,. And he'll come tumbling down the stairs in the middle of the night. And my initial reaction to that is to want to say, "It's okay. Mommy's here." Right? And that's true. And I do think that offers some temporal comfort. And it is a good thing for a mother to be present in the time of a child's need. But thinking more deeply, I began to say, "Buddy, God is with you. You have no need to fear." And the reason for that is because I started thinking about, well, what if mommy wasn't here? What if I wasn't able to be here? And some of that came just from having lost my own father in the last few years to cancer spontaneously. And just thinking, like, what are the lasting truths that I then want to impart to my children when I'm no longer able to be present? So, it is true. It's comfort that mommy is here in your time of need. But also, even when mommy's not able to be here, remember, God is with you always. And it's been such an encouragement for me then to even see him, like, on the playground and his little buddy will get hurt. And he'll turn and he'll tell his buddy, like, "It's okay. God's with you." You know what I'm thinking? "That's so, good. Like, this is the kind of stuff that I want to be just ingrained within the children so, that their initial reaction is, 'It's okay. God is with me.'" Similarly, the message that is repeated throughout the book is, "Jesus Loves You More". And that was really instigated from one of my children requesting for me to say over and over again this popular phrase that we've all heard, "I love you to the moon and back." And I started thinking, like, "Okay, that's true. I do. I love you to the moon and back. I love you to the, you know, mountaintop and to the ocean floor. I love you as far as the east is from the west. But there is one who loves you even more than I ever could. And in fact, when my love fails you, His never will." And so, I wanted to get that. If there's one message that I want my kids to know, it's that. It's that Jesus loves them so, much that he went all the way to the cross at Calvary and gave his very life so, that they could be made right with God. So, that's the message that I hope kids will take away from the book. I do hope that it inspires parents to think about what are those lasting truths that they want to impart to their kids. And I hope it equips them then to be able to share what I believe as Christian parents is the most important message we could ever give. Laura Dugger: (49:48 - 49:54) I just want to acknowledge too, I'm so, sorry for the sudden loss of your father in recent years. Hunter Beless: (49:55 - 50:19) Well, thank you. Yeah, it's, you know, my kids were just saying as we were hiking this last weekend, they're like, "We miss puppy." But we're like, I'm at a point now where I did go through many years of grief, missing him, you know, all of this. But just relishing in the fact that he's in the presence of the Lord Jesus. And I am just so grateful because he's in a much better place. So, I'm looking forward to the day that I get to join him there. Amen. Laura Dugger: (50:20 - 50:28) Well, Hunter, you've already given us so much, but where can we go to continue being discipled by you after this conversation? Hunter Beless: (50:30 - 51:14) Well, if you like conversations like this, you know, I infrequently show up at Journey Women. We used to do a weekly show and then it turned to bi-weekly and now we're seasonal. But I do love having conversations just like this. And I hope that, you know, just as our conversation today, I hope it encourages women just to get together, like you said, with women in their local context to open up God's word. And just to go deeper, relationally, conversationally, to come together around the truths of God's word. You've asked such great questions, Laura. And I think take some of these questions and ask your friends and see where the Lord guides those conversations. I think that'll just be such a blessing. It's been a blessing to meet and chat with you today. Laura Dugger: (51:15 - 51:32) Well, I've loved every minute. And you may already be familiar that we're called The Savvy Sauce because savvy is synonymous with practical knowledge or insight or discernment. And so, as my final question for you today, Hunter, what is your Savvy Sauce? Hunter Beless: (51:34 - 52:28) Oh, you try to nail me down to something practical. It's funny, Laura, because I feel like I resist practical. And I'm not sure what it is about me that resists practical other than maybe sometimes I felt like bound in by people's practical advice. Does that make sense? And so, for me, here's my practical advice. My practical advice is to allow all of your practices or your practicals to be informed by the principles of the text. So, allow the principles of scripture to inform your practice. And that's not very practical, but I think the only practical way you can do that is to get your face in your Bible and to really seek to know and love God through his word. And then he will certainly help inform your practice. Laura Dugger: (52:30 - 56:34) I think that's actually more practical than you realize. That is wonderful. And Hunter, your joy and your laugh are just contagious. And you're clearly gifted from the Lord as a clear, articulate communicator. And it blesses so, many people in so many generations because you are able to filter in the truth and then communicate it in a way that's able to be received. So, it's been so encouraging to sit under your teaching and be inspired to take this out and to hopefully begin in our home. But also, those good works, as we're called as older women, too. None of us are exempt, as you said. So, I've just thoroughly enjoyed being with you. Thank you for being my guest. Thank you so much for having me. It's been so fun. One more thing before you go, have you heard the term gospel before? It simply means good news. And I want to share the best news with you, but it starts with the bad news. Every single one of us were born sinners, but Christ desires to rescue us from our sin, which is something we cannot do for ourselves. This means there's absolutely no chance we can make it to heaven on our own. So, for you and for me, it means we deserve death, and we can never pay back the sacrifice we owe to be saved. We need a savior, but God loved us so much. He made a way for his only son to willingly die in our place as the perfect substitute. This gives us hope of life forever in right relationship with him. That is good news. Jesus lived the perfect life. We could never live and died in our place for our sin. This was God's plan to make a way to reconcile with us so that God can look at us and see Jesus. We can be covered and justified through the work Jesus finished. If we choose to receive what he has done for us, Romans 10:9 says, “that if you confess with your mouth, Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved.” So, you pray with me now. Heavenly father, thank you for sending Jesus to take our place. I pray someone today right now is touched and chooses to turn their life over to you. Will you clearly guide them and help them take their next step in faith to declare you as Lord of their life? We trust you to work and change lives now for eternity. In Jesus name we pray. Amen. If you prayed that prayer, you are declaring him for me. So, me for him, you get the opportunity to live your life for him. And at this podcast, we're called The Savvy Sauce for a reason. We want to give you practical tools to implement the knowledge you have learned. So, you're ready to get started. First, tell someone, say it out loud, get a Bible. The first day I made this decision, my parents took me to Barnes and Noble and let me choose my own Bible. I selected the Quest NIV Bible and I love it. You can start by reading the book of John. Also get connected locally, which just means tell someone who's a part of a church in your community that you made a decision to follow Christ. I'm assuming they will be thrilled to talk with you about further steps such as going to church and getting connected to other believers to encourage you. We want to celebrate with you too. So, feel free to leave a comment for us here. If you did make a decision to follow Christ, we also have show notes included where you can read scripture that describes this process. And finally, be encouraged. Luke 15:10 says, “in the same way, I tell you, there is rejoicing in the presence of the angels of God over one sinner who repents.” The heavens are praising with you for your decision today. And if you've already received this good news, I pray you have someone to share it with. You are loved and I look forward to meeting you here next time.