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We watched Big Night. It's a FOOD movie. Like a BIG FOOD movie. Have you made the entire Big Night menu? Oh okay cool GROW UP WE ARE ADULTS. Ohhhh, TIMPANO, It's a DRUM. What is wrong with you? The world is burning, just make some pasta or whatever and get on with life. Also, we sing a song to Tucci's penis.Follow CarbfacePod on Instagram and Twitter.

We all reaching our breaking point. Sometimes we discover a sitz bath.Sometimes we go to another country and write about sourdough. This is how life goes, and we go on, don't we?Follow CarbfacePod on Instagram and Twitter.

We are back reviewing Julia Child's The French Chef: season 1, episode 4 (The French Omelette) and 5 (Scallops). Both aired in February 1963. Laurie discusses the basement toilet in her parents' home, and Chris celebrates his Sonic the Hedgehog 2 cookbook.Follow CarbfacePod on Instagram and Twitter.

Julia Child's The French Chef, Season 1 Episode 3Follow CarbfacePod on Instagram and Twitter.

Julia is back!We review season 1, episode 2 of The French Chef, with Julia making French onion soup. We're also joined by directors Julie Cohen and Betsy West to discuss their latest documentary, Julia. Follow CarbfacePod on Instagram and Twitter.

Naz Riahi, writer and director, joins us to talk about the Beyond Sausage that greeted her when she visited her local Wegman's and how it went viral. Follow Naz on Instagram and Twitter.Follow CarbfacePod on Instagram and Twitter.

It's time for Joyce Chen Cooks!It's episode one of the series, Egg Foo Yung.Watch the episode here.Read more about Joyce Chen here and here and look at her stamp!Laurie wants you to know the pesticide she used on her son's head lice was Malthion.Follow CarbfacePod on Instagram and Twitter.

Episode 3 of 3 watching Julia Child’s The French Chef. We watch and discuss season 10, episode 12: Two-Dollar Banquet. Follow CarbfacePod on Instagram and Twitter.

Episode 2 of 3 watching Julia Child’s The French Chef. We watch and discuss season 5, episode 3: Queen of Sheba Cake. Follow CarbfacePod on Instagram and Twitter.

We’re back, and we brought Julia Child with us.We’re watching three episodes across the ten seasons of Julia's first show, The French Chef. First up is Season 1, Episode 1: Beouf Bourguignon.Follow CarbfacePod on Instagram and Twitter.

Tasting Brach’s Turkey Dinner candy corn.Read all about this new candy corn.Follow CarbfacePod on Instagram and Twitter.

We’re back along with Laurie’s air conditioner. Recommendation: Lisa Donovan’s memoir, Our Lady of Perpetual Hunger.Follow CarbfacePod on Instagram and Twitter.

It’s Laurie and Chris with their dreams.Follow CarbfacePod on Instagram and Twitter.

Our lives are changed forever by Joseph’s hedgehog.Follow Joseph on Instagram and Twitter.Follow CarbfacePod on Instagram and Twitter.

Laurie and Chris. Living their best whatevers in quarantine.Follow CarbfacePod on Instagram and Twitter.

The co-(g)hosts of the best podcast ever, RETAIL NIGHTMARES, are here! Alicia and Jessica join us through an intricate web of Zoom, phone, and tin cans to help make our dreams come true. Plus, we have the podcast world premiere of BONGO DANCE by Auto Syndicate (Jay Arner and Jessica Delisle!)Listen to RETAIL NIGHTMARES.Order Alicia’s book, SO YOU'RE A LITTLE SAD, SO WHAT? Nice Things to Say to Yourself on Bad Days and Other Essays.Listen and support Jessica’s band, ENERGY SLIME.Follow Alicia on Twitter.Follow Jessica on Twitter.Follow CarbfacePod on Instagram and Twitter.

It’s Laurie and Chris. It’s the halting whisper of The Daily. Upstate New York. IGA. Super Valu vs. Super Value vs. Supr Value. The home of ham salad. An unknown self-quarantine. The murder basement. The NYT. Otterstan. Tiger King. Happy birthday, Laurie!Follow CarbfacePod on Instagram and Twitter.

It’s Laurie and Chris, homebound.Please forgive the audio quality. We’re using USB mics. We’re alive and mostly well for now.Alternate titles:GO FOCACCIA YOURSELFLUNAR FOOTWEARGALLOPING LESSONSI'M COOKING FOODREAL-TIME GARBANZO FINDERCHICKPEA AVAILABILITY INDEXRELEASE THE BUTTHOLE CUTWHAT ABOUT PROM BLAINE?THE HOTDOG IS A GAPERA HOTDOG DOWN A HOTDOG'S HALLWAYCHICKPEA PERSONAL MASSAGERA GAME OF DODGEBALL FOR MY JUNKBE KIND, DO GOOD, EAT ASS

It’s a mini-episode!It’s just Laurie and Chris, and that is a blessing to you and your life. Recorded before Christmas, this content is TIMELESS.Topics: Billy, chicken pox, clown mouth, Hustler magazines, and dog pregnancies. All this and what our favo(u)rite Food Network stars do on Jesus’ birthday.Sponsored by:Warby ParkerBarkboxStoryworthFollow AJ Spaceman on Twitter.Follow Melk the Band on Instagram.Follow CarbfacePod on Instagram and Twitter.

Farideh is back with a brand-new cookbook! And it’s the very first episode of #CakeOnes.Buy the new cookbook from Farideh and the editors of MUNCHIES. It’s called MUNCHIES Guide to Dinner: How to Feed Yourself and Your Friends!Follow Farideh on Instagram and Twitter.Follow CarbfacePod on Instagram and Twitter.

It's a mini-episode with Laurie and Chris (and a sexy robot voice).

Elazar Sontag is our guest!Topics: No further questions. A halitosis notification service. Julia and Grace. Peppers. Flavors of Oakland. How not to be an a-hole. Serious Eats. Crust Magazine. Paper Candy Gifts. Butt Detective.Follow Elazar Sontag on Instagram.Follow CarbfacePod on Instagram and Twitter.Our PO Box:CarbfacePO Box 595New York NY 10185

It’s Laurie and Chris, with a little Cliss.Topics: JT made HI-CHEW beer and sent chocolate and fig preserves! Chris’ nightstand. Mai sent us paper food! The fish market. Going to the hospital. Dogs and bikes. Mrs. Clark, Chris’ first grade teacher. Hives. Do not blink. A socka fulla blood. A coupon. Saba Jam! A high amount of soft. Do you ever find yourself mad? Summer vegetables. Rold Gold is not Red Gold. The tomato fields of Indiana. A mailed potato. David has a pet named Walter. From behind. Keep your dog on a leash. Hank is puppo of the week. Retail Nightmares is the best podcast. Friendship. Personal Pan Rice Krispie Treats. Doughboys can’t be bought. No penetration of the Cracklin’ Oat Bran. Farley Elliott.Follow CarbfacePod on Instagram and Twitter.Our PO Box:CarbfacePO Box 595New York NY 10185

It’s Laurie and Chris (no Cliss).Topics: Strong Mustard Content. A Rice Krispie Treat is a gift. Texts from family members. No Further Questions. None Pizza Left Beef. Jeremy Renner. Other people’s shoes. Dump and stir. Lemon Bullshit Cake recipe. Friends of the podcast. My love and your ignorance. What Was This Food Network Episode All About? Walgreens cookout.Episode Sponsors:BarkBox: http://getbarkbox.com/carbfaceWarby Parker: http://warbyparkertrial.com/carbface

It’s just Laurie and Chris this week. Topics: Robot voice. Writing. Cliss’ brother. Beyond Goatse. Gilbert. A finger. Cat steam. Straws. Rat piss. Lots of Likes, Miami edition. JCP. Black and white cookies. Mashups. Todd Bridges. Patty Lupone. A Full Dinty house.We recorded remotely (using a podcasting service we will never use again), and the sound quality isn’t great. We promise future remote eps will have better sound quality.We love you and only want the best for you.Follow CarbfacePod on Instagram and Twitter.Our PO Box:CarbfacePO Box 595New York NY 10185

The fantastic Matt and Ted Lee are here to talk about their new book, Hotbox.Topics: Ball of goo. Bucket of kimchi. Alison Roman. These are things that happened. They’re real big. No further questions. Chef cruise. @Crust Magazine @anannadroid @hooleil @john_birdsall @korshawilson. Summer camp storytelling challenge. Laurie’s mom. Fiddlehead ferns. @restofesto @ruckerfoad (JT). The Summit Y. Roasted vegetables. Matt and Ted Lee. I will find you.Assignment: Call in your worst summer camp experiences to the Carbface Voicemail Hotline (+1.646.397.3357) or email them to carbfacepod@gmail.com.Follow The Lee Bros. on Twitter and Instagram.Buy their new book, Hotbox.Follow CarbfacePod on Instagram and Twitter.Our PO Box:CarbfacePO Box 595New York NY 10185

Maggie Hoffman, the original “Hello, Listener” is here with her new book, BATCH COCKTAILS!Topics: Sugar. Lunch but it’s breakfast. Train eating. Totes. Retail Nightmares with Alicia and Jessica. Remix. Pants on the inside. She’s got a deep voice, too. Connie Britton is a treasure. Esoteric HI-CHEW. Burger Rings. Weed City. Sloughed off flesh. Truffles in your underpants. A very brief statement on Peep’s. My favorite book of the Bible. It’s Hello, Listener! Julia Bainbridge’s podcast, The Lonely Hour.Follow Maggie Hoffman on Instagram and Twitter.Buy her book, BATCH COCKTAILS!Follow CarbfacePod on Instagram and Twitter.Our PO Box:CarbfacePO Box 595New York NY 10185

Priya Krishna is here to talk about her new cookbook, Indian-ish!Topics: Amy Grant. Baby, Baby. Keith Thomas. Friends. Chris Judson. Amy Jahnke. Growers. Show-ers. Choads/chodes. Sari Kamin! June 15-16, Urinal Strike!Follow Priya Krishna on Instagram and Twitter.Buy her book, Indian-ish!Follow CarbfacePod on Instagram and Twitter.Our PO Box:CarbfacePO Box 595New York NY 10185

Yasmin Khan is here with her beautiful new book, Zaitoun: Recipes and Stories from the Palestinian KitchenTopics: Happy Cherry. The Greatest City in the World. Malfunctions. Introductions. Kai Ryssdal. Air horn. Durian. All the podcasts. Retail Nightmares is the best podcast. Happy birthday, Laurie. I would not bake for you. The sex lives of public radio hosts. Legacies. KRF. Terry Gross. Ari Shapiro. Nina Totenberg. Don’t look in my eyes. London. France. I see a dead chicken’s head. Mega Fauna. Speedways. OMG so much candy and seasoning and mustard from Marisa Miller! What’s the worst thing you ate? The Heavenly Bed. Boner pie. I’ll bake for you. Just facts.Follow Yasmin Khan on Instagram and Twitter.Buy her book, Zaitoun: Recipes and Stories from the Palestinian Kitchen.Follow CarbfacePod on Instagram and Twitter.Our PO Box:CarbfacePO Box 595New York NY 10185

Sister and brother, Romilly and Griffin Newman, are our guests!Romilly (recovering teen chef) and Griffin (star of Amazon’s The Tick and co-host of the Blank Check podcast) join us to talk food, Chopped, and bodily ailments.Topics: Murder. JT. Owen. As a mom. Naps. Cancer, a Love Story, by Christen Clifford. Pen15. Cats. Piss Kiss. Travels. Nigella. A little eye. How to Shop. Retail Nightmares. Big ol’ bucket. Cake. Spice nerds. Fergus Henderson. Candy is a gateway to Jesus. Grape Mentos.

Stella Parks/BraveTart is here, and she brought cake! Topics: The big headphones. 3D. LSD. Take half. Meetings. Speaking. Hello, listener. Always something to learn. Creating spaces. Everyone gets arrested. Navigating parties. Lemonade party. A list. Full Dinty, again. She’s ok. A hamster. Alaska. A wide-legged jean. Both eyes. Choose your choice. Greyhound. Flavorful Origins. PorknWhiskey. Wilford Brimley. Oatmeal. Will Scarlett.Follow Stella Parks on Instagram and Twitter.Read Stella on Serious Eats.Follow CarbfacePod on Instagram and Twitter.Our PO Box:CarbfacePO Box 595New York NY 10185

Grace Bonney, founder of Design*Sponge + @goodcompanyzine and author of In The Company of Women, is our amazing guest, talking about the realities of publishing and so much more.Topics: Lin-Manuel Miranda. Dear Evan Hansen. Cool story, bro is not the name of this episode. Avocado toast shoes. Jesus buns. Food shoes. Wide feet. Full Dinty. Herp Mouth. Shoes for Cliss. Busy Tonight. Caissie St. Onge. Heels on the couch. It’s a pump. Straight in the eyes. Dragonfruit. Panic in the Kmart. Exotic candy. Child of a pirate. Take down your birthday. As a mom is back. Abandoned shopping malls. Grace Bonney!Follow embroiderer Tessa Perlow on Instagram.Follow Grace Bonney on Instagram and Twitter.Follow Good Company Magazine on Instagram.Discover where to buy Good Company MagazineFollow CarbfacePod on Instagram and Twitter.Our PO Box:CarbfacePO Box 595New York NY 10185

Dennis Lee (a.k.a., Fart Sandwich; a.k.a., Dickhole Dannis) is our beautiful guest!Topics: It came back. Therapy podcasts. Jade eggs. Feeling fresh. Before care. Beards. Grain bowls. Gifts. Six inches. Dinty. Plushies. Carbface apparel. Cake Ones. Cosplay. Real sex. Top five gifs. Bonito flakes. Ponies. Teeth. HalalSnackbox.com. Dirty John. Dennis Lee. Fart Sandwich. Dickhole Dannis. Toaster oven pop tarts.Follow Dennis on Instagram and Twitter.Follow CarbfacePod on Instagram and Twitter.Our PO Box:CarbfacePO Box 595New York NY 10185

Our intern and Senior Editor at Food & Wine, Kat Kinsman is here!Topics: AJ Space Boy. Nando’s. Shout out to the Shetland Islands. All the Woolevers. Farming in Queens. Hot dog stand. Move the hole. Hot Ones. Chris Schonberger. Kat!Follow Kat on Instagram and Twitter.Follow CarbfacePod on Instagram and Twitter.Our PO Box:CarbfacePO Box 595New York NY 10185

Mitchell Davis, Chief Strategy Officer of the James Beard Foundation, is our guest.He brought snacks!Alternate Episode Titles:A Single Shrimp in My PurseI Don't Like MusicJames Beard CosplayPickles, Honesty, HusbandThank You For Not Blocking MeEverything is Edible (If You Have Enough Teeth)Follow Mitchell on Instagram and Twitter.Follow CarbfacePod on Instagram and Twitter.Our PO Box:CarbfacePO Box 595New York NY 10185We love you.

It’s a minisode, and we’re all trying to pretend we’re not gonna die!Topics: Are you sick? I found $15 in my backpack. Premium salads. Minimum MFAs. Romaine; e. coli. Watery chicken. Everyone' a monster. Merry Christmas and happy Easter.Follow CarbfacePod on Instagram and Twitter.

Fresh from Netflix, we have Samin Nosrat! Topics: Yogurt/yog-hurt. Lamb shoulder. Deal breakers. Beard awards. Religion. Cliss. Poppers expert. Dinner parties. Dim sum. Food Town. Autumn mix. Christmas trees. Coffee. Samin!Follow Samin on Instagram and Twitter.Follow CarbfacePod on Instagram and Twitter.Watch Samin’s Salt, Fat, Acid, Heat on Netflix.

Some wonderful, magical people from HI-CHEW are our guests! We are joined by Kayleigh Westerfield, HI-CHEW Brand Marketing Manager, and Jennifer Moling, HI-CHEW Product Marketing Manager. Topics: Hello. Samin Nosrat. Be our intern. Sitcom resurrection. Save $60. What’s on the list? Elbow macaroni. December 1. As a mom. Lin-Manuel Miranda is great in everything. Loosies. Dentists. Ina. Fancy people’s cereal. Boulder, Colorado. Artistic sweaters. I didn’t know until after we were married. Handwritten notes. Help me. Out of meat. The Cajuns of Colorado. Terre Haute. Essays. Memories. HI-CHEW!Follow HI-CHEW on Instagram and Twitter.Follow CarbfacePod on Instagram and Twitter.Read Laurie’s essay about Bourdain on CNN.com.Read It’s Decorative Gourd Season, Motherfuckers by Colin Nissan on McSweeney’s.

Our special "Election Aftermath" episode.Topics: A sweaty November. Voting. Pod Save America. Lin-Manuel. Puttin’ on the Hits. Proud Mary. Mean Girls. A Star Is Born. Ping pong.

Topics: An abundance. Constructive and complimentary. Cliss. Poppers culture. A septum. Marching bands. I thought you’d love these. Top 3 Life Advice Recommendations. Candy! Blue Raspberry. WARNING: the sound of Pop Rocks. Necco Wafers. Jellicle Cats.Follow The Restaurant Manifesto on Twitter.Read Adam's Food & Wine essay.Follow CarbfacePod on Instagram and Twitter.

Julia Turshen is our guest, and she has a wonderful new book, Now & Again.Topics: Killing vegetables. Mellowcremes, again. Big moods. Other people’s pets as proxies for verbally expressing emotion. BUY JULIA’S BOOK IT IS VERY GOOD THANK YOU.Follow Julia on Instagram and Twitter.Follow CarbfacePod on Instagram and Twitter.

Khushbu Shah, the senior food editor at Thrillist, is our guest.Topics: Gifts. Lashing out. Mellowcreme. Modernist Cuisine. Doing candy corn. The Emmys. Sports are fun. As a mom. Alexander Hamilton. Bowling with Lin-Manuel. Ben Ahr Harrison. Jesse Thorn. Children. Cockfighting.Read: How Ferrero Rocher Became a Status Symbol for Immigrant Families by Liana AghajanianFollow Khushbu on Instagram and Twitter.Follow CarbfacePod on Instagram and Twitter.

Farideh Sadeghin, the culinary director of Munchies, is our guest.Farideh played a big part in Munchies' new cookbook, Bong Appétit: Mastering the Art of Cooking with Weed.Topics: First grade teachers. A sock full of blood. What's in the box? Zatarain's. Paris. Pomodoro technique. Drake's Cakes. The Flop House. Put a thing in a thing. Terrible people. Follow Farideh on Instagram and Twitter.Follow CarbfacePod on Instagram and Twitter.

Nik Sharma is our guest, and he has a beautiful new book.Topics:Retail Nightmares cheerleading squad. Mango Hi-Chews. A grating personality. The quiet car. New projects. Our guest, Nik Sharma. John Birdsall. Order Nik’s book, Season: Big Flavors, Beautiful Food.Follow Nik Sharma on Instagram and Twitter.Follow CarbfacePod on Instagram and Twitter.

Preeti Mistry is our guest, and we are in love with her. Topics: Jennifer Marmor. Judge John Hodgman. Kim's Brother. Cocaine. As a Mom. Just get me to the beach. Top 5 Things to Eat on the Beach (again). Bacon jam.Follow Preeti Mistry on Instagram and Twitter.Follow CarbfacePod on Instagram and Twitter.

Doug Quint of Big Gay Ice Cream joins us, and we've never been happier.Topics: AJ, Space Boy. Retail Nightmares. Finnish discounts. Cheese. Saxophones. Ham Salad. Generous with the Chicken. A lot of appetizers. Andrew Zimmern. Meat, meat, meat. Illinois. Velcro mittens. Phone throwing. Bryan Petroff. Big Gay Ice Cream Cookbook. Pints. Crying in the ice cream aisle. Tuna sandwiches. Astronauts. Lactaid. Kat Kinsman. Petting unicorns. Pie crust integrity. Thin coating of fat. Propofol. My time. Burritos. Michael Solomonov. Lamb fat. Regan Stephens. Traci Lords. Edie and The Eggs. David Harbour. Tape worms. Monkey. Laurie tries Hi-Chews for the first time. If you hear me sneeze.Follow Big Gay Ice Cream on Instagram and Twitter. Follow CarbfacePod on Instagram and TwitterSubscribe to the Retail Nightmares podcast. Didgeridoo: You can hear AJ, Space Boy on Episode 153 of Retail Nightmares (listen to the whole episode, but AJ comes in around the 51-minute mark).

Laurie and Chris discuss the death of Laurie's boss and collaborator and this podcast's executive producer, Anthony Bourdain. This episode discusses suicide and death and deals with loss in a humorous way. If you’re not in an emotionally stable place to listen, please do not.Recorded three days after his death, there's no music and no guest. Just two people eating a lot of Hi-Chews and trying very hard to find a reason to laugh.Read Helen Rosner’s essay about Bourdain (The New Yorker).How to get help: In the US, call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255. The International Association for Suicide Prevention and Befrienders Worldwide also provide contact information for crisis centers around the world.

Gaby Dalkin of What's Gaby Cooking talks about her new cookbook and the warm nut incident; Anthony Bourdain answers "what you smell like?"Topics: Thank you for being who you are. Yogurt/yoghurt. Clowns. Uffizi. Matt Armendariz. Adam Pearson.Follow Gaby Dalkin on Instagram and TwitterFollow CarbfacePod on Instagram and Twitter

Coffee. Yogurt. As a Mom. Anthony Bourdain discusses Harvey Weinstein and Mario Batali. Follow CarbfacePod on Instagram and TwitterFollow Sari (pronounced like Mary) Kamin on Twitter and subscribe to her podcast, The Morning After.

Brooks Headley joins us and tells us all about his new Superiority Burger Cookbook! Anthony Bourdain tells us where he would bury Chris’ body. Follow Superiority BurgerFollow AJ the Space Boy @ajdigregorioFollow interesting person @matt_bigthinkFollow CarbfacePod on Instagram and TwitterTopics: Twelve-Hour Sudafed. The Interesting People Party. The Special People's Club. Shrimp on a white carpet. Monologues. Loverboy. Crosnes. Veggie Burgers are awesome. Silliness is our theme. Choke me out.

Follow Joe Yonan on Twitter.Follow CarbfacePod on Instagram and Twitter.Topics: Deadlines. Bitcoin. James Beard Awards. BMs. Chef cosplay. Sexy aprons. Brunch. Things in your beard. IACP. WaPo Food. Voraciously. Snacks. Jelly beans. Ginger. Lotsa likes. And Unfuck My Life, Anthony Bourdain.