Fried. The Burnout Podcast

Mel Hopper Koppelman was so burned out that in spite of being longtime friends with host Cait Donovan, she did not immediately recognize her own connection with childhood trauma and burnout. Growing up labeled as a “gifted kid”, Mel developed blind spots regarding aspects of her neurological development that were lacking. As an adult, she developed complex chronic health issues. Because of her blind spots, it would be years before Mel realized the connection between her childhood experiences, her health issues, and burnout. Now, as the founder of Synthesis Health Lab, Mel helps other people who are struggling with chronic health issues to heal and live their best lives.   While some conditions of burnout are environmental, others can be linked to neurological development, adverse childhood experiences, and genetic factors. For Mel, much of her burnout and chronic health issues ended up being linked to uneven neurological development. Through testing, Mel discovered that she retained primitive reflexes, typically not seen beyond one year of age, that influenced nervous system dysfunction. When nervous system dysregulation stems from delayed or uneven neurological development, the resulting burnout needs to be approached differently. The same techniques that work for burnout for someone with an evenly developed brain will not work the same way for someone whose neurological development differs.   If you are struggling from complex, chronic health problems like fibromyalgia, gastrointestinal disorders, autoimmunity, or chronic fatigue, consider getting tested for retained primitive reflexes. Your nervous system may be dysregulated due to differences in your neurological development.    Quotes • “We might be having a difficult time understanding development because we are underdeveloped ourselves.” (8:06 | Cait) • “One of the things that goes along with certain types of developmental issues, like we see with a lot of neurodiversity, is a characteristic unevenness of skills.” (9:52 | Mel) • “Things can run in families that are not necessarily genetic.” (15:10 | Mel) • “When we have adverse childhood events…and development is not unfolding optimally, then those primitive reflexes, instead of getting integrated, which means that the brain matures and kind of stops them from being active,…those reflexes are still there.” (26:59 | Mel) Links Connect with Mel Hopper Koppelman: https://essays.synthesishealth.co/ https://www.instagram.com/synthesishealth.co/ https://www.linkedin.com/in/melhopperkoppelman/ https://synthesishealth.co/join-us https://www.drrobertmelillo.com/ Coach with Cait: bit.ly/callcait Coach with Sarah: bit.ly/callsarahv Hire Cait for Your Event: https://caitdonovan.as.me/inquiry Join the FB Group: https://facebook.com/groups/friedtheburnoutpodcast XOXO, C   If you know that it's time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you've been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait   https://friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/quiz   Podcast production and show notes provided by HiveCast.fm  

Coping mechanisms are something that you use every single day, probably without even realizing it. These coping mechanisms start to develop as soon as you are born, forming based on your relationship with your primary caregiver. Depending on how that relationship goes, you form one of four attachment styles, three of which can make you more prone to burnout later in life. In today's #straightfromcait episode, host and burnout aficionado Cait Donovan explains what coping mechanisms are and how to tell whether your current coping mechanisms would be considered adaptive or maladaptive.   Pretty much all coping mechanisms can be either adaptive or maladaptive depending on the intention behind them. Sometimes, even if a coping mechanism is not technically healthy, it may still be useful for your survival in the moment. When a coping mechanism is maladaptive, it means that while it may help you temporarily, it also has the potential for consequences that could be worse than the initial problem you were trying to solve. Examples of maladaptive coping mechanisms include rumination, substance abuse, self harm, daydreaming, hypervigilance, and disengagement. Adaptive coping mechanisms are those that are considered both helpful and healthy in the long run, such as emotion regulation, speaking with a therapist or a friend, and intentional forced distraction.    While healing from trauma and burnout, you will engage many coping mechanisms. In the same way that your burning out was not your fault, your default coping mechanisms are also not your fault. They were determined long before you had any say in what they were. Instead of demonizing behaviors that were helpful for you in the past for being maladaptive, look at how you can update them to be more healthy going forward and leave behind the ones that are no longer serving you.    Quotes • “A coping mechanism is an action or a behavior that you engage in when you need to overcome a difficulty.” (1:37-1:44 | Cait) • “The initial response of your primary caregiver to those needs that you are trying to convey is what guides how you will eventually long term create your particular style of coping.” (2:03-2:16 | Cait) • “Children who form secure attachments go through life with more self confidence, more resilience, and more ability to trust the people around them.” (2:39-2:49 | Cait) • “Most coping mechanisms can be adaptive or maladaptive depending on the intentionality with which they are used.” (12:00-12:06 | Cait)    Links  https://positivepsychology.com/coping/ https://positivepsychology.com/maladaptive-coping/   Coach with Cait: bit.ly/callcait Coach with Sarah: bit.ly/callsarahv Hire Cait for Your Event: https://caitdonovan.as.me/inquiry Join the FB Group: https://facebook.com/groups/friedtheburnoutpodcast XOXO, C   If you know that it's time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you've been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait   https://friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/quiz   Podcast production and show notes provided by HiveCast.fm  

Heather Hansen's burnout, like unfortunately so many others, landed her in the hospital. Her stress levels had become so extreme due to her career as a defense attorney that Heather's body responded with a severe allergic reaction. Afterward, Heather realized she needed to start advocating for herself with the same level of compassion, love, and loyalty that she had for her clients in the courtroom. Now, a Best-Selling author and speaker, Heather teaches others how to self-advocate through mastering the art of the ask and convincing their inner juries.    In a courtroom, both sides present the exact same evidence from different perspectives. It is up to the jury to consider that evidence and choose which side to support. The same is true for your inner jury. When you start looking for evidence of positive things about yourself, your inner jury will feel more confident about trusting you. This will make it easier for you to advocate for yourself. Give yourself permission to pursue what you want for now, knowing that it will change at some point. Once you know what it is you want, then it is time to ask for help or accommodations out loud and with delight. In order to ask effectively, you must speak with compassion, curiosity, and credibility. Approach your ask from the other person's perspective instead of your own by asking what they want and speaking to it.    Recovering from burnout requires that you be able to ask for help when you need it. Self-advocacy can be particularly challenging for perfectionists, but it does not have to be. When you can ask for what you need from a place of compassion rather than resentment, you are much more likely to get a ‘yes'.    Quotes • “What I decided to do was to start advocating for myself the way that I advocated for my clients in the courtroom.” (5:02-5:09 | Heather) • “You need to know what you want. You need to ask for it out loud and with delight. And you need to master the ask.” (8:55-9:02 | Heather) • “You've got to give your inner jury a different story.” (11:23-11:11:25 | Heather) • “For those of us who got to where we thought we wanted to be, and then it wasn't the right place for us anymore…that's okay. It just means that you are meant for more.” (13:29-13:42 | Heather) • “If you are asking with resentment, you are very unlikely to get the things that you want.” (16:27-16:34 | Heather) • “In the courtroom, both sides have the same evidence. And both sides use the same evidence to prove different things. So you need to decide what story you want to support.” (19:10-19:21 | Heather) • “If you're struggling with advocating for yourself, make it about something else…Sometimes if you can externalize it, it makes it easier to start advocating.” (48:10-48:37 | Heather)   Links Connect with Heather Hansen: https://advocatetowin.com/ https://www.instagram.com/anelegantwarrior/ https://www.linkedin.com/in/heather-hansen-84243512/ https://view.flodesk.com/pages/64710dde8533b6ba4f709de9   XOXO, C   If you know that it's time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you've been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait   https://friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/quiz   Podcast production and show notes provided by HiveCast.fm  

Dex Randall's burnout experience was a long time coming. He shares that as a child, right from the beginning, he was always afraid of everything. His parents' behavior was unpredictable and he learned very quickly that it was not a good idea to trust any person ever. The coping mechanisms that Dex learned as protective measures throughout childhood followed into adulthood. Eventually, this came to a head when Dex entered into a job position where he was not in alignment with the founder and felt unable to do his job the way he wanted to. He explains that at that moment, he really felt like the stress was going to kill him. He quit his job on the spot and three weeks later experienced a heart attack that landed him in the ICU.    Dex's experience with his burnout and heart attack led him to become a burnout coach specializing in male burnout. Even though he now is an accomplished burnout professional, it was a long journey to relearn and deconstruct the maladaptive coping mechanisms from childhood that had been so critical to his survival. Around 5 years ago, Dex was diagnosed with cPTSD, which is complex PTSD that results from long standing, repetitive trauma. This diagnosis helped Dex to reframe his burnout and understand that it was not his fault. Psychological safety is incredibly important, and it can be very hard to ask for help, especially if you have been conditioned not to trust people socially.    Men are typically less likely than women to seek help as they view it as a weakness, but there is nothing more courageous than asking for help. Burnout is not your fault, and you can recover from it. The energy to do so already resides inside you. You just have to seek out the love within your heart.    Quotes • “This thought went through my mind that the stress was at such a high level now that it was physically going to kill me.” (4:40-4:47 | Dex) • “Whatever we learn as a child as a coping mechanism is very hardwired in by the time we become an adult.” (16:25-16:30 | Dex) • “Complex PTSD is often a label given to people who, for example, were in the military where they've had repeated trauma in the military sense, but it's more often given to people who experience trauma they couldn't digest as children.” (18:51-19:08 | Dex) • “We really do need to do some work on psychological safety, because it really makes a big difference.” (23:05-23:10 | Dex) • “I think what men in burnout, the message that I would extend to them is that they are wonderful, well intentioned, big hearted human beings who are suffering intensely for reasons beyond their control.” (40:46-41:00 | Dex) • “I have to realize I'm a valuable and worthy human being before I'm going to do anything about the experiences of burnout.” (43:35-43:43 | Dex)    Links Connect with Dex Randall: Website: https://dexrandall.com/  Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/coachdexrandall/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/company/coachdexrandall XOXO, C   If you know that it's time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you've been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait   https://friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/quiz   Podcast production and show notes provided by HiveCast.fm  

Even if you do not think you have experienced childhood trauma, there are many ways that childhood experiences can impact your ability to regulate your emotions. Adverse childhood experiences or ACEs include both events that happened to you like abuse or neglect and events that you simply witnessed. Trauma impacts child brain development at an epigenetic level, causing deficiencies in the part of the brain responsible for executive functioning and emotion regulation. In today's #straightfromcait episode, host Cait Donovan discusses the link between ACEs and burnout.    Adverse childhood experiences impact the brain in a way that is very similar to the effects seen from long term stress. These experiences have a direct impact on the neurochemicals and hormones that are needed for regulating stress. Since your stress system cannot function the way it is supposed to, you are more prone to burnout. This further demonstrates how burnout is systemic and not the fault of the individual.    If you have a higher ACEs score, such as one that is at a 4 or above, you are more likely to have a higher level of emotional dysregulation. Any adverse events that happened in your childhood physically changed the way your brain developed and caused you to be more susceptible to burnout. Remember to be gentle with yourself, because burnout is not your fault and it may take longer for you to recover from stress than someone with a lower ACEs score.    Quotes  • “You don't have to be the ‘direct victim' of abuse or neglect for it to affect you and your physical and emotional and mental health later on in life.” (6:54-7:06 | Cait) • “I truly believe that if we spend more time helping families to live healthier with one another that is the way we eliminate burnout long-term. That's the way we really hashtag end burnout culture.” (8:21-8:35 | Cait)  • “There are interruptions to proper brain development when you experience adverse childhood experiences. These changes in brain development are nearly the same ones as we see with long term chronic stress.” (9:10-9:30 | Cait) • “Adverse childhood experiences have various effects on the actual neurochemicals and hormones of your stress response and the structures that they attach to, and that interrupts your stress cycle somehow.” (15:32-15:50 | Cait) • “If your stress response system is not working the way that it's supposed to, you are going to be more likely to burn out.” (23:24-23:33 | Cait) • “Burnout is not your fault. You do deserve better.” (25:04-25:06 | Cait)   Links  Burnout Recovery Group Coaching Summer Cohort: https://bit.ly/summerFRIEDgroup https://www.npr.org/sections/health-shots/2015/03/02/387007941/take-the-ace-quiz-and-learn-what-it-does-and-doesnt-mean https://www.cdc.gov/violenceprevention/aces/index.html https://www.cdc.gov/vitalsigns/aces/pdf/vs-1105-aces-H.pdf Supportive Research for a Correlation between ACEs and Burnout    XOXO, C   If you know that it's time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you've been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait   https://friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/quiz   Podcast production and show notes provided by HiveCast.fm  

Kelley Bonner experienced burnout while working in what she thought would be her forever job. Since she was a little girl, she had dreamed of becoming a prison social worker. As a Black woman and daughter of an immigrant mother, she was inspired by her desire to help Black and Brown people who are disproportionately harmed by the prison system. After nearly three years of working what was supposed to be her dream job, Kelley found herself having a full blown panic attack on the floor of the prison complex. Approximately six months later, she quit her job with no plan. Now, Kelley is a company culture strategist and licensed therapist with over 15 years of experience, as well as the host of the Black Girl Burnout podcast.    Kelley's burnout experience helped her to realize that she had the wrong impression of what work was meant to be. Fundamentally, work is just work. When you look to your boss or co-workers for validation, those boundaries between life and work can become very blurry. Therapy can help you to learn how to center joy in your life. Once you center your life around joy, everything else will fall into place. The intersection of racism and burnout created additional challenges like unlearning the unconscious biases that she had been taught by her parents, such as, that as a Black woman, she needed to be better than the best at all times.   Putting aside her perfectionism as a high achieving Black woman was challenging, but it also freed up so much more space for joy in Kelley's life. Remember to build joy into your days and shift your mindset around work so that it does not take over your whole identity.    Quotes • “You cannot heal from a place of shame.” (11:05-11:08 | Kelley) • “I really put a lot of my identity into what I could do being competent. And not just being competent, being the best.” (15:47-15:54 | Kelley) • “Fundamentally that is what work is. It gives you the opportunity to express what matters to you and express your values.” (22:45-22:51 | Kelley)  • “I don't think you should hate work. I don't think you should be apathetic toward work. But you need to remember, it's just work.” (33:23-33:30 | Kelley) • “When joy is at the center, the money comes, the relationships come, the ease with which you navigate your day, it all comes from what you center.” (36:11-36:21 | Kelley)   Links Connect with Kelley Bonner: https://www.blackgirlburnout.com http://instagram.com/blackgirlburnout/ and https://www.instagram.com/kelleyabonner/ https://www.linkedin.com/in/kelleybonnerlcsw/ https://view.flodesk.com/pages/63a215d8531f97890ef2a34f XOXO, C   If you know that it's time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you've been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait   https://friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/quiz   Podcast production and show notes provided by HiveCast.fm  

During burnout, it's common to not use your resources in the most efficient way. An important step in burnout recovery is to look at how you are using your resources like time, energy, money, and community and see where you could be resourcing more sustainably. In today's #straightfromcaitandsarah episode, host Cait Donovan and FRIED Burnout Recovery Guide, Sarah Vosen, discuss how to assess, access, and assemble the resources you need to optimize your burnout recovery.    In Sarah's burnout recovery group coaching, she leads a resourcing exercise which compares the human body to a tree using resources from the Earth to survive. A tree naturally uses its available resources in a sustainable way. For a sustainable burnout recovery plan, you have to be really intentional about budgeting your resources and seeing where you might need to prune the tree a bit. If you put all your focus on one resource like money and neglect others, your tree will be unbalanced. In order to re-resource, look at where you are spending your time and energy and see where you can make space for recovery and rest.    Burnout recovery requires rest. If you do not budget time and energy appropriately, you will be too busy to make adequate space in your day for rest and may find yourself trapped in a repeating cycle of burnout. Be honest with yourself and assess how you are using your resources and how to re-assemble them so that your tree can thrive.    Quotes • “During burnout, you're exploiting your resources the same way we're exploiting the resources of the Earth.” (5:14-5:20 | Cait) • “If you're only focused on money, and you're only doing things that make you money, and you're ignoring all of your other resources, you're probably not going to feel the greatest.” (15:02-15:12 | Sarah) • “Burnout is a valid reason to take a break, to shift some things in your life, to meet your own needs and ask for help getting your needs met from other people if that's what it takes, and to recover.” (24:01-24:20 | Sarah) • “Having other people to support you in your life and working with other people doesn't dilute your ideas. It makes you more resourced.” (30:25-30:35 | Cait)    Links    https://caitdonovan.as.me/sarah-group bit.ly/summerFRIEDgroup   XOXO, C   If you know that it's time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you've been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait   https://friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/quiz   Podcast production and show notes provided by HiveCast.fm  

Karina Schneider spent nearly two decades working in a corporate environment prior to setting up her own private coaching and consulting practice with a focus on helping workplaces become spaces that support employee wellbeing. Now, as a reintegration coach, Karina consults with employees and their leaders as they navigate a return to work after a mental health leave. Karina is uniquely qualified to help both employees and employers through this process, as she has prior experience in the HR field and navigated her own return to work after seven months of leave for burnout recovery.   Whether you are returning from a longer FMLA leave, or even a shorter period of time, it is important to understand that your return to work is actually still part of the recovery process. Those first few days and weeks will be all about figuring out if you can apply what you learned during your time away to your work environment. You should not expect to have the same amount of energy that you had prior to your leave or try to push yourself too hard too fast. As part of recovery, those initial days are mostly about learning how to show up again and re-training your body for your work routine. Before even considering when to return to work, take time to think about what you have learned about yourself and what really matters to you. When you know what is most important to you, then you can set proper boundaries and advocate for yourself to your managers and HR team.    Pay close attention to signals from your body when you think about your return to work. Is your body telling you that now is the right time or are you feeling pressure or guilt from outside sources? It is critical for your burnout recovery and the prevention of future burnout that you go at your own pace and do not jump back full swing into work too quickly after a medical leave.   Quotes • “We're not going to talk about day one until we're clear what you've learned about yourself and what matters to you.” (15:03-15:09 | Karina)  • “We should create an environment where people feel like it's okay to just put a name to it that I struggle with ADHD, or I live with depression, or I went through burnout.” (23:48-23:59 | Karina) • “As much as I advocate for the employee owning the planning, HR and line managers play a crucial role. And if they can do that together, even better.” (33:26-33:36 | Karina) • “One of the biggest challenges they face in their first weeks is energy.” (34:44-34:48 | Karina) • “I don't say that as a weakness of ‘I only can work three days a week', but rather, ‘I choose to work three days a week', because that's what's right for me and for my family.” (42:28-42:39 | Karina)   Links Connect with Karina Schneider: Website: www.karinaschneider.com Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/karinaschneider_ccs/ LinkedIn: www.linkedin.com/in/karschneider Website: https://www.karinaschneider.com/returntowork XOXO, C   If you know that it's time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you've been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait   https://friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/quiz   Podcast production and show notes provided by HiveCast.fm  

When people think about self-care they often picture soaking in a bubble bath, but in reality, self-care is so much more than that. Self-care is an absolutely critical part of burnout recovery. In today's #straightfromcait episode, Cait Donovan, host and burnout speaker, shares the three types of self-care that are crucial for both burnout prevention and recovery.   Cait explains that the number one type of self-care for burnout is foundational self-care. This means that you must take the time to learn how to recognize your body's signals and actually respond to them. As you do this more, your body learns that it can trust you to meet its needs such as needing to go to the bathroom or being hungry or thirsty. Once you have invested in foundational self-care, you can move on to self-advocacy, which requires you to start speaking up for yourself and asking for what you want. This is much easier to do after building up your sense of self worth with foundational self-care. Lastly, Cait shares that sometimes coping mechanisms that used to be beneficial can become maladaptive and need to be revised. Take a look at your coping mechanisms to see which ones might still work for you and which may need to be upgraded.   You know that self-care is much more than just taking a bubble bath or meditating for a half hour. True self-care is all about investing time into taking care of yourself both physically and mentally and realizing that you are deserving of having your needs met.    Quotes • “Taking self care out of the burnout recovery equation is doing a massive disservice to everyone who needs to recover from burnout because you can't actually get out of burnout without some sort of self care.” (1:20-1:34 | Cait) • “If you do not ever learn how to speak out loud the things you want, need, desire and prefer, you are very unlikely to get those things.” (7:35-7:44 | Cait) • “If you want to recover from burnout, you must engage in the self care of self advocacy.” (9:19-9:25 | Cait)  • “This unwinding of your current coping mechanisms and keeping the ones that work well and upgrading some other ones that maybe don't work so well, is an absolutely necessary part of self care.” (12:13-12:32 | Cait) • “Coping mechanisms sometimes become maladaptive and they need to be upgraded.” (14:19-14:22 | Cait)   Links  Heather Hansen (Self Advocacy):  https://www.instagram.com/anelegantwarrior/   XOXO, C   If you know that it's time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you've been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait   https://friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/quiz   Podcast production and show notes provided by HiveCast.fm  

Rebecca Kase is the Owner of Rebecca Kase & CO, LLC as well as a licensed clinical social worker and author of Polyvagal Informed EMDR: A Neuro Informed Approach To Healing. You may remember her burnout story from a previous episode of FRIED. Rebecca began studying polyvagal theory at the start of the pandemic and is now an EMDR consultant and trainer. Today, she discusses the science behind polyvagal theory, how EMDR works, and how to use neuroception for healing the stress responses of the autonomic nervous system.   Polyvagal theory was developed by a researcher who was studying the heart rate changes in NICU infants in response to both safety and stress. This study was a breakthrough in seeing how stressors impact the autonomic nervous system. The symptoms of burnout all come from the autonomic nervous system. When you're experiencing burnout, you may think that your nervous system is out to get you, but in reality it is just doing what it has adapted to do to–keep you alive. When you experience trauma or toxic stress, those memories can get stuck in your autonomic nervous system and cause physical symptoms every time the memory is triggered. EMDR can be used to unstick those memories and remove the stress response.    Toxic stress, or stress that continues for a long time and overwhelms your abilities to cope, can lead to a slew of serious and chronic health issues. When you take the time to befriend your autonomic nervous system and retrain it to recognize safety cues, you can reduce unwanted stress responses. Quotes • “The symptoms of burnout are all held within your autonomic nervous system.” (8:41-8:45 | Rebecca)  • “Toxic stress is really about those experiences that overwhelm your capacity to cope with and often, not always, have a pretty big dose.” (14:49-15:00 | Rebecca) • “These circuits are all adaptive. They're not your enemy. They have worked, or you wouldn't be here.” (23:48-23:54 | Rebecca) • “There's a humongous, overwhelming correlation to toxic stress and degenerative diseases.” (34:27-34:34 | Rebecca) • “You don't just think about your memories, you feel your memories.” (41:35-41:38 | Rebecca) • “When we can consciously appraise neuroception, we can increase the autonomic nervous system's awareness of safety.” (50:14-50:21 | Rebecca)   Links Connect with Rebecca: Rebeccakase.comhttps://www.linkedin.com/company/69036196/admin/, Buy Rebecca's Book, Polyvagal-Informed EMDR: A Neuro-Informed Approach to Healing: https://www.amazon.com/Polyvagal-Informed-EMDR-Neuro-Informed-Approach-Healing/dp/1324030313   XOXO, C   If you know that it's time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you've been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait   https://friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/quiz   Podcast production and show notes provided by HiveCast.fm  

Shelley Kemmerer is a parent, a board certified physician assistant and the founder of Run Tell Mom, LLC. During her clinical year to become a physician's assistant, Shelley became pregnant. She chose to keep her pregnancy a secret, even while enduring constant sickness. Her child was born right as she was taking her boards and afterward she threw herself into work, extending her hours so that she could work fewer days. This very quickly led Shelley right into the dual role collision of the responsibilities of being a mother and working outside the home. Today, Shelley discusses parental burnout, burnout prevention as family planning, and her own advice for already burnt out mothers and expectant parents.   Mom burnout is incredibly common, especially in places like the United States where there is no federally mandated parental leave for working mothers. When moms experience parental burnout it differs from the experience of workplace burnout in that it involves a sense of detachment from one's own child and a feeling of ineffectiveness as a parent. For those already at that stage, reaching out to an integrated care team can be a great help. If you're not quite at that stage yet, but are looking to prevent burnout, it is important to analyze how your time is being used, reassign household tasks, and prioritize your own self investment.   Juggling the responsibilities of parenthood and work can lead to a lot of physical and mental exhaustion. Before hitting the tipping point, lean into self strategy and figure out what you can do to regain more time for yourself throughout your day.    Quotes • “You're asking people to take care of other people, but not taking care of yourself.” (11:12-11:15 | Shelley) • “What I would love is if burnout prevention was considered a real component of family planning.” (20:30-20:37 | Shelley)  • “There's a lot to be said about burnout prevention or burnout strategies. Instead of saying self care, I'm talking about the self strategy of how to clean things up and lean into what is most necessary for myself right now.” (33:31-33:46 | Shelley) • “Prior to that boiling point, you need to start thinking about your time and how much of it is consumed with all the tasks and responsibilities that you have throughout the day, in comparison to the time that you have to rest.” (36:33-36:48 | Shelley)   Links Connect with Shelley Kemmerer: https://runtellmom.com https://www.instagram.com/runtellmom/ https://www.linkedin.com/in/shelleykemmererpac/ https://runtellmom.com   https://www.katemangino.com/media-page/print https://www.fairplaylife.com/the-cards https://www.amazon.com/Real-Self-Care-Transformative-Redefining-Wellness/dp/0593489721 XOXO, C   If you know that it's time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you've been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait   https://friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/quiz   Podcast production and show notes provided by HiveCast.fm  

Monica Monfre Scantlebury is a certified life coach, health coach, and yoga instructor, but she did not start that way. Monica spent 8 years working as a teacher at the university level and then another 15 working as a highschool teacher. Even though she loved being a teacher, by year 7 educator burnout was having significant effects on her health and wellbeing. She decided to walk away from teaching and turn her side hustle of being a yoga instructor into a full-time job. Today, Monica discusses teacher burnout and how she used her side hustle as a way to pivot from teaching.    Teachers encourage students to take proper care of themselves and to follow their dreams, but they are not allowed to actually model what they teach. Neither teachers nor students can go to the bathroom or eat when they need to, and teachers are penalized for taking sick days. Monica received her first ever low evaluation score her final year of teaching, not because she was doing anything wrong, but because she had dared to use 9 out of her 10 sick days to have a hysterectomy after discovering cancer cells in her fallopian tubes. With teachers not being given the ability to take care of themselves, it is only natural that educator burnout would occur at extremely high rates. Although Monica was nervous to pursue her side hustle full-time, she is now making more money and experiencing a much more manageable level of stress.    Sometimes teachers worry that all they can do is teach, but being a teacher requires a slew of skills that can translate over to other professions. Teachers spend all day marketing ideas to their students, trying to persuade them to do what they want, and they also have a lot of experience as speakers. It is easy to feel stuck after being in the same profession for a long time, but there are always opportunities to pivot.    Quotes • “I walked away from a $106,000 salary in New York City, because I was burned out.” (7:34-7:40 | Monica) • “80% of teachers are women. The time off that it takes us to recover whether you're having a child or you're having a health condition, I don't think that people do it from a place of, ‘I'm out to get you,' but 10 days off is not enough.” (8:24-8:42 | Monica) • “We can't say that we want our teachers to be well and that we want them to practice social-emotional learning with their students when in fact our teachers are unwell.” (9:05-9:16 | Monica)  • “A lot of teachers don't take their time off because it goes against our evaluation, and it costs more work to actually prepare to be out of the classroom, which leads to more burnout.” (15:25-15:37 | Monica) • “If you tell your students that they can chase their dreams and do the things and take care of themselves, then we have to model that.” (21:57-22:03 | Monica) • “People say if you can't do something you teach, and I would tell you that we teach, because we can do all the things.” (33:54-34:00 | Monica)   Links Connect with Monica Monfre Scantlebury: https://www.monicamonfre.com https://www.instagram.com/monicamonfre/ https://www.linkedin.com/in/monicamonfre/ https://www.monicamonfre.com/reliablerevenuetraining   XOXO, C   If you know that it's time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you've been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait   https://friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/quiz   Podcast production and show notes provided by HiveCast.fm  

Nikki Hume is an art teacher at an international school in Manila. She taught for 9 years in the states before teaching abroad and attributes her two burnout experiences with helping her to learn very valuable life lessons. Today, Nikki discusses teacher burnout and how it relates to her own experiences teaching internationally.    Educator burnout has a variety of root causes, but one of the largest is a lack of proper work life balance and well-established boundaries. Nikki explains that in international schools there is actually even less of a clear divide between school and personal life, because there is more of an expectation for teachers to be socially involved with their colleagues. Unless you put in significant effort to make outside friends, the majority of your friendships will likely be with other teachers. Another issue causing burnt out teachers is that there is often a lack of clarity on job responsibilities from day to day. Teachers may burn out simply because they are overwhelmed by the amount of demands being put on them that are technically outside of their job description.   As the world changes, so too do the expectations and requirements for teachers. Kids have different needs than they did in the past and there is a lot of pressure on educators to take on an emotional caregiver type role in addition to their educational role. By establishing strong boundaries and being very intentional about upholding them, teachers can prevent burnout and keep doing what they love.   Quotes • “If you love teaching and you don't want to burn out from it, you don't want to make a full career change, then you have to protect yourself.” (18:42-18:52 | Nikki)  • “Colleagues aren't just your colleagues in the international world.” (21:15-21:18 | Nikki) • “It's a lack of an understanding of collaboration and what that means for teachers working within teams, and teachers connecting also to administrative support.” (26:36-26:49 | Nikki) • “There's times where the expectations for what your role is on that day is not clear.” (28:15-28:20 | Nikki) • “The one thing teachers say is there's never enough time. There's never enough time in the school day, in their own day sometimes to get all the things done. And so I wonder if we just let teachers do their job, what is in their job description, and not keep adding to the plate without taking something else off, would that idea of expectations shift?” (28:38-29:08 | Nikki) • “Everyone's definition of collaboration is different.” (33:46-33:48 | Nikki) • “The world has also shifted and the things that kids need is very different. Sometimes I can't relate to it, so I just have to be empathetic to it.” (44:15-44:24 | Nikki)   Links Connect with Nikki Hume:  LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/nikki-hume-3b90b632/   XOXO, C   If you know that it's time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you've been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait   https://friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/quiz   Podcast production and show notes provided by HiveCast.fm  

From learning body signals to learning about the link between energy expenditure and finances, over 100 guests have opened up and shared their burnout stories. In today's #straightfromcait episode, Cait Donovan, host and burnout speaker, shares burnout recovery tips from 2 guests from each season of FRIED, including lessons from guests like Ashley Rose, Maggie Reyes, Simone Craig, Dr. Valerie Ryan, and more.   Ashley Rose was the first guest ever on FRIED. She and Cait spoke about how childhood trauma creates a greater risk of burnout as an adult. Next, Cait recalls the episode with Maggie Reyes about how there can be a physical component to burnout. You can do all the therapy you want, but if something is physically wrong like a thyroid deficiency or anemia, you will not be able to fully recover without addressing it first. Cait goes on to share more stories from past podcast guests, delving into topics like addiction and codependency, the patriarchy, and the neuroscience of burnout.   There is a lot of valuable information provided throughout the six seasons of FRIED thanks to over 100 guests opening up and sharing their stories of burnout recovery. With tips about being more in touch with your body, following the breadcrumbs to make small changes, surrendering control, and more, you can be sure to learn something that will resonate with your own experiences.   Quotes • “Burnout was part of the story, but part of her burnout was this physical portion. And I think that's so important to remember in a world that is telling us constantly that trauma is the root of all of our problems.” (6:46-6:57 | Cait)  • “Follow the breadcrumbs. Look to the smallest little hints of what you should be doing next and follow those and allow them to slowly transform you, instead of trying to make this big massive change. Because big massive changes take big massive energy that you just don't have right now.” (7:25-7:42 | Cait) • “Codependence is this way that we give to other people so much until there's nothing of us left, until we are completely lost. This is such a common thing in burnout.” (10:21-10:31 | Cait) • “When you don't have systems in place to make your life easier, you're spending extra energy figuring everything out fresh every time you do it. Which means that you are blocking the energy that you need to have available for creativity, for joy, for fun, for things that are not get this task done kind of energy.” (15:29-15:48 | Cait)   Links  https://www.friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/post/ashley-rose https://www.friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/post/maggie-reyes https://www.friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/post/dr-valerie-rein https://www.friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/post/simone-craig https://www.friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/post/melanie-moberg https://www.friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/post/shonte-javon-taylor https://www.friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/post/jim-young-ceo-dad-burnout-emotional-gold-digging-and-why-relationships-matter https://www.friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/post/casey-davidson-alcohol-use-overwork-and-the-societally-accepted-addiction-that-feeds-them-both https://www.friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/post/dan-sykes-the-somatic-fanatic-talks-the-power-of-curiosity-for-nervous-system-training https://www.friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/post/nneka-roberts-using-systems-to-create-more-time-mental-space-creativity-and-money https://www.friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/post/newton-cheng-i-burned-out-in-corporate-and-stayed-this-is-how XOXO, C   If you know that it's time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you've been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait   https://friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/quiz   Podcast production and show notes provided by HiveCast.fm  

Aesha Tahir is the founder of Tone and Strengthen, a corporate wellness company, as well as an author and exercise physiologist. Her book, Unhunched: Discovering Wellness Through Posture, is set for release this Spring. Today, Aesha shares how posture impacts the stress system and burnout recoverability.    Aesha is no stranger to burnout after having experienced it twice. Her first experience led her to the ER, fearful that she was having a stroke when her left foot went completely numb. It turned out that her stressful highly sedentary corporate lifestyle coupled with being a wife and mother was causing sciatica. She spent 12 hours at work slouching and all day stressing out about her responsibilities while ignoring her body's signals for help until she literally had no choice but to listen. When she had her second child, Aesha decided to step back from work and got more active. Within six months of being more active, her back pain was gone even though she was caring for a newborn. Being pain free was not the only benefit either. As Aesha worked on her posture and stopped slouching and unknowingly taking a submissive stance, people began to compliment her and view her as more confident.   Body language accounts for 93% of all communication. So it is important to set yourself up for success through having good posture. Slouching puts stress on your nervous system and causes it to activate flight or fight mode, increasing your risk for burnout. Tune into today's episode of FRIED. The Burnout Podcast for a conversation with Aesha Tahir on how posture affects the stress system and what steps you can take to improve it today.   Quotes • “A lot of times we are not aware of what's happening within our bodies.” (9:17-9:21 | Aesha) • “When I started working out regularly, and I removed the excessive stress from my life, now I had the room to understand and be in tune with my body.” (9:53-10:06 | Aesha) • “93% of the communication is through body language. So, is your body language set up for success or not?” (15:32-15:40 | Aesha) • “When we have this rounded shoulder posture or hunched over posture, literally we are collapsing our lungs and our diaphragm.” (20:12-20:19 | Aesha) • “When you have poor posture the stress center in our brain, which we call the red nucleus, responds to the physical poor posture and activates the sympathetic nervous system.” (30:49-31:05 | Aesha) • “You can use your posture, your body language, for success, not just physically, not just to be pain free, but also to step into the greatness of your own being.” (40:15-40:30 | Aesha)    Links https://www.ted.com/talks/amy_cuddy_your_body_language_may_shape_who_you_are/comments www.toneandstrengthen.com https://www.instagram.com/tone_and_strengthen/ https://www.linkedin.com/in/aeshatahir/ https://unhunched.ck.page/ecf6947f70   Convertible Desk: https://www.amazon.com/VIVO-Converter-Adjustable-Workstation-DESK-V028KB/dp/B0BGYGTSR5/ref=pd_ci_mcx_mh_mcx_views_0?pd_rd_w=ZG4Z5&content-id=amzn1.sym.1bcf206d-941a-4dd9-9560-bdaa3c824953&pf_rd_p=1bcf206d-941a-4dd9-9560-bdaa3c824953&pf_rd_r=3SZ9QRR6YD717QCZKHBP&pd_rd_wg=3jvQv&pd_rd_r=b73baebf-13dd-43b5-81cd-ef276cdd273a&pd_rd_i=B0BGYGTSR5 XOXO, C   If you know that it's time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you've been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait   https://friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/quiz   Podcast production and show notes provided by HiveCast.fm  

If you used to have an exercise routine before burning out, you may be wondering when it is safe to start exercising again. The truth is that it differs for everyone, and you know your body better than anyone else. Learning to listen to your body and make adjustments based on what it is telling you is key for burnout recovery. In today's #straightfromcait episode, Cait Donovan, host and burnout speaker, shares tips for incorporating exercise into your burnout recovery.   Movement is critical for your overall health. Resting is a big part of recovery too, but that does not mean sitting around doing nothing all day every day. Start incorporating movement back into your life slowly and see how it goes. Don't try to do a high intensity workout or a big run right away as those things are likely to overuse your energy stores and cause you to crash harder. Just adding in a short ten or twenty minute morning walk can make a huge difference. Energy building exercises like Tai Chi and Yin Yoga can be excellent tools to add movement back into your day without pushing your body too far.    Everyone's body is different, so only you can really know how much exercise your body is ready to take on. Listening to your body and getting really in tune with how it is feeling is the best thing you can do for your overall burnout recovery. Start by going slow, checking in with your body after every movement, and making sure you are getting enough fuel through what you are eating.    Quotes • “The best time to do this 10 or 20 minute walk is as close to sunrise as possible, that way you are starting the proper cascade of hormones in your body right from the get go.” (7:19-7:31 | Cait) • “Pushing it with exercise when you're feeling strong is a good thing to do, that's a healthy thing to do. But when you're burned out, it can be a little bit tricky, because it overuses your energy.” (10:25-10:33 | Cait) • “In order to exercise efficiently and to use the energy well, and for your body to get stuff out of it, you should have quality food.” (13:47-13:54 | Cait) • “Keep moving any way that you can. Add more when you feel up for it, scale back if it exhausts you, and check in with your fuel sources.” (15:22-15:33 | Cait) • “Listening to what your body is telling you is the most critical factor in your recovery.” (15:39-15:44 | Cait)   Links    XOXO, C   If you know that it's time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you've been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait   https://friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/quiz https://instagram.com/carolynbrownie https://instagram.com/isabelsmithnutrition https://instagram.com/themetabolismmakeover https://drinklmnt.com/   Podcast production and show notes provided by HiveCast.fm  

Lauren Baptiste is the founder of Acheloa Wellness. She is approaching her 10 year burnout anniversary and attributes much of her healing to the practice of Ayurveda. Today, Lauren shares the magic of small steps for burnout recovery that helped her get to this point.    When Lauren began to burnout, her body reacted in very serious ways. She ended up covered head to toe in hives and needed to go to the emergency room. Even covered in hives, her boss expected her to bring her computer to the hospital and to report for work the next morning. Lauren's doctor explained that she was burned out and needed to make changes before her health got worse. As she realized how much stress impacts health, Lauren discovered Ayurveda, the study of life and longevity. It has been around for around 3 to 5,000 years and is an Indian practice grounded in Chinese medicine. Ayurveda provided tools for Lauren to make small, simple changes to her day that would ultimately lead to her burnout recovery. These changes included things like waking at sunrise to really take advantage of her morning and incorporating daily moments of gratitude.   It takes time to become burned out, and recovery can take just as long, or even longer. Instead of being frustrated by how long recovery is taking, know that there are small steps you can take right away that will help you. Tune into today's episode of FRIED. The Burnout Podcast for a conversation with Lauren Baptiste on the magic of small steps for burnout recovery.    Quotes • “I learned that day that I had burnout. The doctor came back. He said to me, ‘Lauren, you're dealing with stress. You need to change something. Otherwise you're going to come back to me with much bigger problems one day'.” (9:41-9:55 | Lauren) • “I knew in those first formidable years of corporate, it's kill or be killed. And I didn't realize that I was the one killing myself.” (20:45-20:53 | Lauren) • “When I think of an exit strategy from burnout, it's understanding that it took years to get into this and it can take years to get out of it.” (29:10-29:22 | Lauren)  • “If we can prep our body the best way possible, it does have an effect on our overall well being. It does give us the best poker hand possible to win this game of burnout.” (41:52-42:06 | Lauren)    Links Connect with Lauren Baptiste: www.acheloawellness.com https://instagram.com/acheloawelness https://www.linkedin.com/in/lauren-baptiste/ 3 Steps to Set Healthy Boundaries: https://www.dropbox.com/s/gxrsodqox89jd0v/Acheloa%20Wellness%20-%20Freebie%20-%203%20Steps%20to%20Set%20Healthy%20Boundaries.pdf?dl=0 Self Massage: Self Massage Customizing Your Self Massage   XOXO, C   If you know that it's time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you've been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait   https://friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/quiz   Podcast production and show notes provided by HiveCast.fm  

During your burnout recovery, you will likely still not be at your original energy level for a while. It takes a different amount of time for everyone, but in Cait's experience the average time frame has been around 18 months.  In today's #straightfromcait episode, Cait Donovan, host and burnout speaker, shares 8 tips for helping to get your energy back during recovery.   Doing too much all at once can cause you to do more harm than good for your recovery. Start with choosing one thing to work on, and then once it becomes a habit you can move on to the next. A good place to start is seeing your doctor for blood work, or if you can afford it going to a functional medicine practitioner. If you have an underlying medical issue like anemia or low Vitamin D, you will not be able to feel energized regardless of how much mindset work you do. Another simple tip to improve your energy is to drink more water. Just adding one additional glass of water each day is a great way to keep yourself from becoming dehydrated, especially if you add in some electrolytes.    Overdoing it is part of what causes burnout in the first place, so be patient with yourself during recovery. Be honest and take a step back if you find yourself doing too much. Start with small actionable steps like drinking more water or improving your posture and slowly work up to doing more as your energy returns.   Quotes • “If your vitamin D or B12 are low, or if you're anemic or your thyroid is off, you're not going to feel rested and or energized no matter how much mindset work you do.” (2:02-2:14 | Cait) • “You can't have energy without water. If you aren't drinking enough, and you know who you are out there, add one more glass a day.” (3:44-3:52 | Cait)  • “Check in and be honest about whether or not you're overdoing it, please. Because when you start to feel better, you might be inclined to work like you used to. And you might just not be able to do that yet. If you're overworking, you'll need to take a step back somehow. Learning how to rebalance your life is part of recovery, and it's impossible to feel rested when you're always overworked.” (5:14-5:36 | Cait)  • “Did you know that when you're sitting in a crappy position all day and you don't breathe fully and therefore you don't use energy well, you're basically creating an inefficient machine?” (5:40-5:50 | Cait) • “If you aren't moving because exercise still feels like it's too much, you might need to shift your mindset around what exercise means.” (6:29-6:37 | Cait) • “Be patient with yourself, please. The desire to push yourself beyond your energetic means is a piece of what drew you to burnout in the first place.” (7:43-7:52 | Cait)   Links  https://instagram.com/carolynbrownie https://instagram.com/isabelsmithnutrition https://instagram.com/themetabolismmakeover https://instagram.com/lalunehealing https://www.youtube.com/@SpringForestQigongYouTube https://www.friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/post/riley-jarvis-the-big-secrets-of-exceptional-sleep-with-the-sleep-consultant https://www.friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/post/carolyn-brown-love-where-you-live-beautify-your-home-and-drink-your-damn-water https://www.friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/post/isabel-smith https://www.friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/post/elizabeth-collins-the-burnout-witch-talks-leaky-gut-tarot-and-optimal-blood-work https://drinklmnt.com/?utm_source=google&utm_medium=cpc&gclid=Cj0KCQiA3eGfBhCeARIsACpJNU9X5rms3Ys7g762nRUemppIJhQg3yl1Uiv6-UzrHte5xRkyD_4ZjwAaAuY7EALw_wcB   Want to book Cait as a speaker? https://caitdonovan.as.me/inquiry XOXO, C   If you know that it's time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you've been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait   https://friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/quiz   Podcast production and show notes provided by HiveCast.fm  

Ewa Błaszczak is a mentor for leaders and teams, an author, professional speaker, and coaching mentor to host Cait Donovan. Recently she wrote a book in Polish that began as a TED talk about the toxicity of sarcasm and developed into a deep dive on how to detoxify communication.    Communication toxins are a natural defense mechanism that developed in response to our reptilian brain's need for psychological safety and early humans' reliance on one another to survive. When you are in a toxic environment, you are likely to fight others through your communication choices, whether by using sarcasm, ignoring people, or being overly critical. These dangerously toxic communication mechanisms reduce the psychological safety of not only yourself, but also those around you and can lead to burnout. It is impossible for trust to thrive in a toxic environment, so removing those toxins is pivotal for healthy relationships to grow.   Pay close attention to the language you use with yourself. When you improve the way you communicate with yourself, it will have a positive impact on how you communicate with others. Tune into today's episode of FRIED. The Burnout Podcast for a conversation with Ewa Błaszczak about how to heal burnout by detoxing your communication.    Quotes • “There's a specific thing that makes our relationships crumble, that makes our lives literally miserable, and these are communication toxins.” (18:38-18:47 | Ewa) • “We lack psychological safety. We are warring with ourselves and others constantly.” (19:09-19:16 | Ewa)  • “If you are subject to sarcasm on a daily basis, your immune system gets compromised for the next four years and it causes all those autoimmune diseases.” (23:20-23:33 | Ewa) • “We have to pay close attention to how we treat ourselves on a daily basis.” (36:39-36:45 | Ewa) • “Start with yourself and start with monitoring your own inner communication, because once you change the way you communicate with yourself, there will be less pain and you'll be less vulnerable.” (38:37-38:49 | Ewa) • “We are all wounded and toxicity is a natural defense mechanism not to feel our own pain.” (41:46-41:56 | Ewa) • “There's no trust in a toxic environment. There's no possibility that the trust is going to thrive.” (48:17-48:23 | Ewa)   Links Connect with Ewa Błaszczak: https://ewablaszczak.com https://www.akashicreadings.eu/ https://gottman.com  https://www.ted.com/talks/ewa_blaszczak_let_s_put_an_end_to_sarcasm   XOXO, C   If you know that it's time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you've been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait   https://friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/quiz   Podcast production and show notes provided by HiveCast.fm  

The steps for healing from burnout are different from what is required to prevent burnout. When you are burnt out and experiencing chronic stress, the part of your brain responsible for executive functioning actually loses neurons. This means that you may struggle more with memory loss and keeping up with all of the day to day responsibilities that come with adulting. In today's #straightfromcait episode, Cait Donovan, host and burnout speaker, shares her tips for healing a burnt out brain.   In order to heal your brain and regain executive functioning skills, you should aim to make progress slowly. You cannot undo 20 years of chronic stress in three weeks and expect your brain to function like new. It takes time to heal and it is best to start small. No one can completely focus and be productive when they are hungry, thirsty, tired, or need to use the bathroom. Even just fixing things like your sleep patterns, making it a habit to eat regularly, and letting yourself pee when you need to are huge for building a healthy foundation.   Chronic stress often leads to burnout, and burnout actively shrinks the part of your brain that handles executive functioning. Healing your brain will take time and intentionality. Start small with activities like brain games on your phone to help improve memory and devoting time to foundational self-care.    Quotes • “The steps that are required to heal from burnout are different than those that are needed to prevent burnout.” (1:46-1:52 | Cait) • “The part of your brain that is responsible for executive functioning loses neurons with chronic stress.” (3:21-3:26 | Cait) • “You're gonna make the most progress with your burnout recovery when you are aiming for things that are just slightly out of your current ability. What I see happening all the time in burnout recovery is that people want to rewind 20 years of stress and damage in three weeks and get back functions that are too many steps ahead of where they are.” (5:31-5:53 | Cait)  • “If you do everything for children, then that interferes with their executive functioning development because they're not being asked to task their brain to learn a new thing.” (8:46-8:56 | Cait) • “Executive functioning skills are at their best when we are at our best.” (9:23-9:28 | Cait)  • “We never expect a young child or a student to be able to grow and learn when they're tired and hungry. Why are you expecting yourself to?” (10:13-10:22 | Cait)   Links    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AKGrmY8OSHM (Non Sleep Deep Rest) https://insighttimer.com https://instagram.com/themetabolismmakeover XOXO, C   If you know that it's time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you've been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait   https://friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/quiz   Podcast production and show notes provided by HiveCast.fm  

Recovering from burnout requires you to be okay with being uncomfortable. Rest is actually incredibly productive, and even though you might feel restless or guilty about sitting still it is vital for recovery. In today's #straightfromcaitandsarah episode, Cait Donovan, host and burnout speaker, and Sarah Vosen, FRIED burnout coach, answer your most common burnout questions from the FRIED Facebook group.   If you are expending too much time and energy and not receiving enough resources back, this will contribute to burnout. You can't go into burnout recovery the same way as you tackle other issues, because it requires an entirely different approach. When your resources are depleted, you need to rest in order to refill those resources. Your body is likely to start sending signals in the form of various ailments and symptoms if you ignore the signs for too long and refuse to rest.    When you are experiencing signs of burnout, it is time to stop and take a break. Allow your body to rest and check in on your routine to see where you may be able to change things. Often you will find yourself running on autopilot and doing things a certain way when there may be a simpler way to do them that enables you to expend less resources.   Quotes • “Recovery requires a different way of being, a different way of doing, a different mode of operation.” (3:35-3:40 | Sarah) • “A lot of burnout recovery happens in these spaces where you learn to sit with feeling uncomfortable.” (6:59-7:07 | Cait) • “When you are faced with the choice of guilt or resentment, choose guilt every time; because resentment eats at you.” (8:09-8:21 | Cait) • “The guilt isn't the problem. The avoidance of the guilt is the problem.” (10:09-10:12 | Cait) • “When we're burnt out, we have depleted our resources oftentimes, especially time and  energy, and we're giving too much. And we're giving too much out to things that aren't refueling our resources. So pausing for a second and a break is a good time to do this, to take an inventory of what am I spending my time, money, and resources, energy on? And what can I stop giving to?” (16:09-16:40 | Sarah)  • “Rest is receiving resources.” (17:52-17:55 | Cait)  • “Any symptom from head to toe can be part of a burnout scenario.” (30:52-30:56 | Cait)   Links    https://bearaby.com https://caitdonovan.as.me/sarah  https://facebook.com/groups/friedtheburnoutpodcast   XOXO, C   If you know that it's time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you've been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait   https://friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/quiz   Podcast production and show notes provided by HiveCast.fm  

Kute Blackson is an inspirational speaker and transformational teacher. He is a member of the Transformational Leadership Council, a group of 100 of the world's foremost authorities in the personal development industry. He learned about the power and the magic of surrender when his mother was diagnosed with stomach cancer and his time with her became more precious than ever before.    Surrender is a powerful tool for transformation and is an important part of burnout recovery. Humans are naturally hardwired to surrender, but as we grow up, we become resistant to it. We tend to forget that the ego is simply a pattern of behavior and not actually who we truly are. When we mistake ego for personal identity, surrender can feel like death instead of being seen for what it really is, a chance to let go and fully accept life for what it is.    Resisting surrender is exhausting and can lead to burnout. When we fully accept surrender for what it is, we can grieve and then move forward. Tune into today's episode of FRIED. The Burnout Podcast for a conversation with Kute Blackson about the magic of surrender.   Quotes • “When I began to surrender and accept that she may not live, maybe this is it, it's as though it transformed me because every moment became sacred.” (7:08-7:22 | Kute) • “It was so profound, because I would sit in chemo sessions with my mother holding her hand in such gratitude for this moment that I had with her. I would sit in the park with her, all the things that I deemed a waste of time, because I was busy saving the planet, that I didn't have time to just sit and take a walk in the park with my mother because it was just not productive was so precious for the first time like it could be the last moment. And so the process of surrendering transformed my relationship to the moment, my relationship to her.” (7:47-8:23 | Kute)  • “Surrender is the most powerful thing that we can do as human beings.” (11:58-12:01 | Kute) • “Surrender is when we stop trying to force or manipulate life to fit our limited idea of how we think it should be and how we think a relationship should be. It's letting go of who we think we should be, and how we think life should be so that we take the limitations off of life so that we can be truly open and available to the highest unfolding that is seeking to happen.” (15:08-15:37 | Kute) • “When we surrender, that's when the magic happens.” (15:44-15:47 | Kute)  • “Surrender is our natural state. That's what I just want people to get. Surrender is in fact hardwired into our physiology.” (24:10-24:19 | Kute) • “Surrender is a death and when we allow ourselves to fully, fully, fully accept, then we can fully grieve. And when we fully grieve that's when we're able to let go.” (41:10-41:21 | Kute)   Links   https://bearaby.com   Connect with Kute Blackson: Website: www.kuteblackson.com Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/kuteblackson/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/kute-blackson-35755519/ Book:  www.themagicofsurrender.com   XOXO, C   If you know that it's time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you've been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait   https://friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/quiz   Podcast production and show notes provided by HiveCast.fm  

Hi All! Last minute episode to be sure that you know what's possible and what you'll get when you decide to join FRIED's group coaching program! You can find the full details on this PDF handout If you're ready to sign up, you can do that HERE. If you'd like to chat with Sarah this week to be sure you're a good fit - feel free to book that call HERE.   Questions? Come hang in the FB group and post your questions on the LIVE version of this podcast that aired on Valentines Day! :)

There are two major theories when it comes to burnout. The first is that it is entirely preventable through a simple shift in workplace culture. The second is that burnout is not always avoidable but can be eliminated through self-care, establishing boundaries, and self-advocacy. According to Cait, the truth is somewhere in the middle. In today's #straightfromcait episode, Cait, host and burnout speaker, talks about the workplace as a trauma recycling center and what that means for burnout.   A toxic workplace often is the result of people recycling their own traumas back onto their peers. Everyone in your workplace, even the people you dislike, has their own trauma that they are bringing to work with them. Our society is not equal and there are many social determinants of health that impact a person's susceptibility to burnout. Also, since everyone comes from different life experiences, your idea of workplace trauma might be very different from your coworker's.    By working with a trauma informed therapist and making time for self-care and self-advocacy, you can work to heal from trauma so that you bring less of it with you to your job. Give yourself grace and compassion above all else, and then find compassion for others as well.    Quotes • “After interviewing more than 100 people for this podcast and working with countless others, I have yet to meet a person who recovered from burnout without engaging in some form of self care.” (2:24-2:35 | Cait) • “The workplace is a trauma recycling center. Workplace culture can be toxic, and we like to blame that on the system. Listen up everybody. I've said this before I'm gonna say it again. We are the system. The people making decisions at the top have just as much trauma as the people burning out along the path. Do you think that the bullies are people who have worked through their own sh*t? Hell no. Do you think that bosses who demand nonstop working and don't understand that you don't want to slash can't actually work 27 hours a day have been through successful therapy or trauma healing? Hell to the no.” (3:23-4:08 | Cait)  • “Until we have created a culture where there aren't large percentages of people who are neglected, abused and traumatized, burnout is always going to end up being one of the results.” (4:28-4:39 | Cait)  • “A psychologically safe workplace for you is not a psychologically safe workplace for someone else.” (6:42-6:47 | Cait) • “When you respond with harshness, even internally, what you're doing is recycling your own trauma in your own body every day. Freeing yourself from that is a powerful step towards reclaiming power over your life and healing from burnout.” (11:48-12:05 | Cait)   Links    https://bearaby.com   Erica Cuni - https://www.ericacuni.com/ Nidha Tewari - https://www.wellbeingspeaker.com/ Holly Doll - https://www.hollyangeladoll.com/ Kari Zee - https://www.karizeecoaching.com/ XOXO, C   If you know that it's time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you've been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait   https://friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/quiz   Podcast production and show notes provided by HiveCast.fm

SPONSOR: Bearaby - the antianxiety weighted blanket that Cait swears by! https://bearaby.com   Nina Blackshear is an attorney and executive coach who specializes in coaching high power and high potential women to overcome obstacles like imposter syndrome. She experienced burnout while working in a high achieving career at a large pharmaceutical company. Getting let go turned out to be a blessing in disguise, because the blinders came off to reveal the toxic environment Nina had been keeping herself in. She spent the next six months working on herself and re-evaluating her next career moves before getting involved with coaching other high achieving women.    While evaluating the source of her imposter syndrome with a therapist, Nina became aware of her mother's narcissistic behavior and how it was still affecting her as an adult. Since she was unable to get the desired attention from her mother, she was seeking someone to fill that role even in her professional life. By attributing this mother role to co-workers, she created unhealthy attachments that left her emotionally unregulated anytime these women would provide even remotely negative feedback.    Imposter syndrome is caused by both internal and external factors. There is only so much you can do about the external factors, but you can change your mindset to eliminate the internal factors. Tune into today's episode of FRIED. The Burnout Podcast for a conversation with Nina Blackshear about eliminating imposter syndrome, stopping the lies, and being unapologetically authentic.    Quotes • “There are other places to go. There are other places to work. There are other things that you can be doing. It's not just this, you don't have to succeed in this particular place” (11:48-12:01 | Nina)  • “When you start to compromise the integrity of who you actually are in order to fit a culture, in order to gain an opportunity, in order to achieve in a culture that may not be that interested in your success. That's when that happens. Imposter syndromes also starts to creep in, in addition to the burnout, right? And it feeds on each other like a snake eating its own tail, because the more you pretzel yourself and strive to be something that you're not, the more stressed out you're going to be. And so you add that internal burnout on top of what external factors are creating burnout, and it's a recipe for like bursting spontaneously into flame.” (14:45-15:21 | Nina)  • “You might feel like an impostor because you are one.” (28:44-28:47 | Nina) • “High achievers don't like to tell you that they don't know something. They want to come up with something on the fly in the moment that sounds good, and they're hoping you don't catch that maybe they don't really know as much about it as you think they do.” (30:13-30:23 | Nina) • “I really think you can eliminate slash overcome impostor syndrome. I don't think it's something you've got to live with like a backpack you carry all the time.” (41:16-41:24 | Nina) • “Stop lying, but also unapologetically be your authentic self.” (42:35-42:39 | Nina) • “Even if you're not in an environment that's showing you your value and your worth or appreciating it, you have so much to offer. You have so much to give, you just might need to change the scenery to feel fulfilled, to feel seen, to feel like you're contributing.” (56:42-56:59 | Nina)   Connect with Nina Blackshear: Website: www.ninablackshear.com LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/nina-blackshear/ XOXO, C   If you know that it's time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you've been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait   https://friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/quiz   Podcast production and show notes provided by HiveCast.fm

Susie Moore is a world renowned life coach, author of Let It Be Easy: Simple Ways to Stop Stressing and Start Living, as well as the host of the Let It Be Easy podcast. Susie's life growing up was anything but easy. She grew up on welfare, moving frequently between domestic violence shelters, and her main hope for her future was to have stability and financial independence. However, once Susie was out of that situation and married in her own place, she realized that she was still unhappy. It wasn't until she did a lot of inner work with consistency and intentionality that she was able to change her thought patterns and her life.   The first step toward an easier life is taking responsibility for your emotions. The way you feel inspires your actions, so by controlling your emotions you can change how you show up in the world. Next, be selective about who has access to your time and energy. If you are always hanging around people who are negative, it will be that much more difficult to remain positive and handle stressful situations. The more you fill your days with hobbies, carefully curated friends, and rich life experiences, the more you will be able to stay calm when something does not go your way.    You don't have to live your life on hard mode. Tune into today's episode of FRIED. The Burnout Podcast for a conversation with Susie Moore about how to let life be easy, take control of your emotions, get out of your own way, and surround yourself with the right people.    Quotes • “Being very selective about who has access to you, and your energy, and your time and attention is critical.” (9:37-9:44 | Susie)  • “Sometimes we tell ourselves a story that well, this is it, there's nowhere else and it might not always be true.” (13:46-13:52 | Susie) • “Just taking responsibility for my emotions is the number one thing in my life, because we act based on how we feel.” (16:28-16:35 | Susie) • “If I have a rich life, if I have hobbies, if I have friends, if I have experiences, I'm going to be just naturally more soothed because I'm less attached to any one thing going my way.” (34:34-34:43 | Susie) • “The reason that I think some people can create and move forward and have momentum is not because they're talented, or special, or unique or different. They just don't have sloppy thinking. Right? It's like, wait, let me rethink this. Do I sound like an idiot? Wait, oh, no, I'm not good enough, actually not ready for that, she's gonna reject me. I am not playing that game with myself. Like, I'm simply not. And if I'm with my heart creating something that I feel is of use or is beautiful or is interesting, that's enough. And if there are errors, or typos, or I missed the mark, that's also okay.” (55:41-56:16 | Susie)   Links https://cuely.ai/FRIED https://bearaby.com Connect with Susie Moore: Website: https://susie-moore.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/susie.moore/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/susiemoore/ Workshop: http://becomeyourownlifecoach.com/   XOXO, C   If you know that it's time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you've been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait   https://friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/quiz   Podcast production and show notes provided by HiveCast.fm

Have you been feeling numb and mentally disconnected from your life? This is a very normal way to feel when you are experiencing burnout. There is a natural overlap that occurs between symptoms of burnout and symptoms of depression and anxiety. In today's #straightfromcait episode, Cait, host and burnout speaker, talks about the debate on whether to use mental health medications to treat the depression and anxiety symptoms that can occur with burnout.    Sometimes people worry that it would be cheating to use medications to treat their burnout. They think they should be able to do it all on their own and may feel uncomfortable about the concept of trying mental health medications. However, you are serving no one by refusing to utilize all the resources at your disposal. Sure, exercise and eating right and building a support system will all help you improve, but when you're burnt out it is extremely difficult to engage with your life in that way. So if you have access to a therapist or a psychiatrist and are diagnosed with a mental health condition and your doctor wishes to prescribe medication for you, you should try it! It is not unfair to anyone for you to use the privileges that you have available to you in order for you to recover.    This is your permission to use any advantage and resource you have access to. Go see that therapist, get that prescription your insurance covers, do whatever you need to do in order to get yourself back on track. The more you heal from burnout the more you will be able to use that energy to give back and help others who are struggling. The more people collectively heal from burnout the more we can work together to end burnout culture.    Quotes • “In the working definition of burnout as it currently exists, which I personally find to be incomplete, it tells us that mental distance is about work. What I've found is that that sense of disconnectedness, that separation from life, occurs across the entire life spectrum.” (2:50-3:09 | Cait) • “This distance, this numbness, this inability to feel close or connected to people is often in a strange overlap place with depression.” (4:26-4:37 | Cait) • “I got caught up in this idea that most medication can be avoided, and a lot of people I know in the Chinese medicine world are pretty anti-prescription overall. Over time, I've learned to realize that this is not really my stance. I know the research that says that exercise, good food, proper rest and building a support community are just as good for depression as medication if not better, in some cases. But I also think that it is absolutely bonkers that we would ask someone who was depressed to try and do those things. You don't have the wherewithal when you're burnt out or depressed to engage in your life in that way. So if you need medication to be able to do the things that you need to do to improve your situation, and you've been diagnosed, and you've been offered a prescription, you should at least try it.” (5:47-6:40 | Cait)  • “Do not try to hero your way through burnout by being tough and not relying on options that could make it easier for you.” (6:54-7:01 | Cait) • “The more that I use my privileges to my advantage, the more I can serve the people I'm here to serve, the better I feel, and the better my life becomes.” (10:30-10:42 | Cait) • “If you have access to making something better for yourself take it, use it, get your energy back, spend that money honey and get that prescription that's covered by your insurance. Take every single advantage that you have and then when you're feeling strong enough and fulfilled enough and happy enough, spread that sh*t around like wildfire.” (14:34-14:52 | Cait) • “We don't end burnout culture by making a massive culture shift. We end burnout culture by not participating in it anymore. We don't participate in it anymore when we heal. So use your advantages, every single one you've got, so that you can reach behind you and pull the next person up in any way that you can.” (17:09-17:32 | Cait)   Links  https://cuely.ai/FRIED https://bearaby.com XOXO, C   If you know that it's time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you've been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait   https://friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/quiz   Podcast production and show notes provided by HiveCast.fm

Julie Brown is a high energy Keynote Speaker who teaches the importance of networking. She is also the author of This Sh*t Works: A No Nonsense Guide to Networking Your Way to More Friends, More Adventures, and More Success, as well as the host of the This Sh*t Works podcast. Prior to her burnout, Julie was overworking herself to the point that she jokingly was jealous of a woman who had awoken from a three day coma, because at least that woman got to sleep. She and her husband were working such hectic schedules that they would not see each other at all during the week. Everything changed when the pandemic hit and Julie realized that the hustle lifestyle had tricked her.    Hustle culture is causing people to overwork themselves until they burn out. Julie was going ‘balls to the wall' for everything every day of her life, except when it came to resting. She shares that the pandemic was a real wake up call, because she and her husband were unsure how they would ever go back to that jam-packed scheduled to the minute lifestyle. In addition to talking about Julie's burnout story, Cait and Julie talk about the importance of networking, how to build a community, and the underestimated strength of weak connections.    Have you ever thought a three day coma sounded appealing? Tune into today's episode of FRIED. The Burnout Podcast for a conversation with Julie Brown about building relationships, the dangers of hustle culture, and allowing yourself to rest.  Quotes • “Your question to me was, ‘Oh, do you have a burnout story?' And it was like, ‘Oh, you mean the time I was getting ready for work, and I heard the story about a woman who had just woken up from a three day coma. And I was jealous of her, because she got to sleep.' And then I said to myself, ‘well, that's what I need. I just need a well timed coma. And then I'll just rest and then I'll be able to get up and I'll be good to go.' And I knew something was wrong in my life where I didn't have time to rest unless there was a medically induced coma in my future.” (2:37-3:21 | Julie) • “There was a point when I was hoping for a coma that I said, ‘Why am I working so hard for someone else? Why do I have this drive to do this for someone else? Can I convert this energy into something else for myself?'.” (6:11-6:29 | Julie) • “You need to have that community in place before a crisis hits, because it's very hard to build a community in crisis.” (19:40-19:48 | Julie) • “Asking for what you need, what would be helpful to you, because you have already given back to your network, because your network wants to be there for you, is invested in your success, whether that success is your mental success, whether it's your financial success, that's not needy.” (21:01-21:19 | Julie) • “It's okay for us to be in places of need sometimes and be in places of abundance sometimes, as long as when we're in places of abundance, we are giving back to our community and giving back to our network.” (21:21-21:32 | Julie) • “If you are keeping score in your relationship, and you are always expecting tit for tat, you're never going to be happy.” (25:08-25:18 | Julie) • “I always tell people to build their network slowly and with purpose, because you cannot manage growing, fostering a number of relationships and do it correctly. And do it without getting tired, because managing relationships takes a lot of time and energy.” (40:04-40:28 | Julie)   Links https://cuely.ai/FRIED https://bearaby.com   Connect with Julie Brown: Website: https://sayhitojulie.com                    https://juliebrownbd.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/juliebrown_bd/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/juliebrownbd/   XOXO, C   If you know that it's time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you've been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait   https://friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/quiz   Podcast production and show notes provided by HiveCast.fm

Is asking for help something that makes you feel very uncomfortable? Do you struggle with figuring out your needs, feeling safe when asking for help, and with actually accepting the help that is offered? Contrary to what many of us like to believe, we cannot do everything on our own. People need each other. In today's #straightfromcait episode, Cait, host and burnout speaker, talks about how to ask for help.    Asking for help opens the door for other perspectives and possibilities you may not have been able to see on your own and also increases your access to resources, which in turn increases your resilience. However, it does not come naturally to everyone. People have this warped idea that asking for help is a sign of weakness or would somehow be an inconvenience to others. The best way to get better at asking for help is to practice. Start practicing asking for help in safe low-stakes situations until you feel more comfortable with the concept. Small daily asks like asking for a glass of water, having someone hold the door open for you, or simply borrowing a pencil can help train your body that asking for help is actually safe.    We are all interconnected and rely on each other for a functioning society. It is important for people to be able to ask each other for help and to feel safe in doing so. No one can succeed purely on their own all the time and trying to do everything by yourself will likely lead to burnout. Learn how to get more comfortable with asking for help, how to determine your needs, and how to accept the help that is offered.    Quotes • “I want you to be able to take this year, use it for practicing asking for help, and do it so often that by the time we get to 2024 asking for help is so natural to you that you forgot that you ever really sucked at it.” (2:09-2:26 | Cait)  • “Asking for help is the only behavior that's even known to increase your resilience by way of increasing your access to resources.” (3:07-3:15 | Cait) • “When you're burnt out, different perspectives and possibilities can be really hard to see, and simply asking for help increases your ability to see possibility, as well as opens the door for other people to present options that you might not have thought of yet.” (7:04-7:20 | Cait) • “My favorite way to figure out where you need help and support and boundaries is to look toward the anger group of emotions, specifically resentment, but including anger, irritation, frustration, annoyance. The anger group is where we find so much great information.” (10:01-10:17 | Cait) • “If you find yourself crowdsourcing for an opinion and nothing fits, I might want you to dig a little deeper to find out if you're completely help resistant. And if you are, it might be time for a coach or a therapist, right? Because we need to find a way to actually get the help in. If you're not going to let any of it in then asking for it is useless.” (14:52-15:12 | Cait) • “Try practicing small asks to gain comfort with the act of asking. We have spoken at length about the fact that burnout recovery requires feelings of safety and asking can feel unsafe. So it is imperative that you ask with training wheels on before you hop on your bike and ride through the streets without a helmet.” (19:47-20:08 | Cait) • “Learning to ask for help by starting small isn't just about your burnout. It's about your humanness. It's about interconnectedness, it's about not buying into and adding to individualistic burnout culture. It's about squashing this idea that alone equals better, and it's about finding ways to protect your long term health starting today.” (23:43-24:07 | Cait) Links  https://cuely.ai/FRIED https://bearaby.com https://caitdonovan.com/resentment-journal https://friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/ https://facebook.com/groups/friedtheburnoutpodcast XOXO, C   If you know that it's time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you've been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait   https://friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/quiz   Podcast production and show notes provided by HiveCast.fm

Today, Cait reports live from The Burnout Panel. She joins Vanessa Zamy, Audrey Holst, Aileen Axtmayer, Dr. Sandra Lewis, and Dr. Sharon Grossman to talk about quiet quitting. These experts in the burnout field weigh in on what they believe is causing quiet quitting to be so rampant and the changes business leaders can make to help their employees feel included, safe, happy, and valued.    Quiet quitting is often a response to overwhelm and can be a coping mechanism for burnout. If your body does not feel safe in your work environment, you are likely going to start to disengage. It is also important to evaluate your current interests and values and see that they align with your role. When people choose to quiet-quit it tends to be due to no longer feeling aligned with their work. To get a handle on quiet quitting, first you need to regenerate your nervous system, so that it is not always on high alert for danger. In order for employees to feel valued, leaders must pay attention and create a safe, fun, and inclusive work environment. If employees start to feel undervalued, they will become resentful and more likely to engage in quiet quitting behaviors.    quiet quitting is not always a choice, sometimes it is a natural reaction to burnout. When it is not being used as a coping mechanism and is instead a conscious choice, it is important for leaders to really pay attention to the work environment. If employees are actively choosing to disengage, they likely feel resentment for some perceived unfairness and they may even feel completely out of alignment with the work they are doing. When employees and employers understand the causes behind quiet quitting, changes can be made to make a better work environment for all.    Quotes • “There are two questions that the body is always scanning for is, am I safe, and do I belong. And this combination of perfectionism with an individual and within an organization can create a bit of a survival situation where people are showing up to work, their bodies are feeling like they are walking into a tiger's cage every single day, their body is getting flooded with cortisol on an everyday basis. And that is bouncing off of coworkers, and it's creating a really tough environment, which is creating those people who are starting to disengage out of survival.” (2:12-2:42 | Audrey) • “When you can create space as an employer or as an employee to really examine these parts of yourself and understand where you're at with each of them, you can then use that framework to understand where your work might not be in alignment anymore, and what you can do to really shift and feel like your values, interests, personality and skills are aligned with the work that you're doing.” (5:29-5:51 | Aileen) • “Achievement is what will allow you to feel pleasure once you've put in the work.” (7:33-7:41 | Dr. Sharon) • “Resentment and quiet quitting have one major thing in common and that is a feeling or perception of unfairness.” (8:34-8:42 | Cait)  • “With support we can create conversations that allow resentment to be explored in a positive and beneficial way. Resentments turn into boundaries, and boundaries help protect us.” (9:17-9:28 | Cait) • “The first thing is to start with regenerating and rejuvenating our nervous system so that then we can start to hear our creativity again.” (11:15-11:21 | Dr. Sandra) • “Whether you're leading an entire business, or you're leading a team in a department, or you're about to become a leader, and you want to do it better than your current boss is, remember rewards, refreshments and recreation. Quiet quitting is preventable.” (13:51-14:04 | Vanessa) • “Quiet quitting is a coping mechanism for burnout when it is used not as a choice but as a natural reaction. So I think we have to separate choosing quiet quitting to protect yourself and quiet quitting because you're so burned out that you have no other choice and you're just trying to make it through your day and not get fired.” (14:48-15:09 | Cait)   Links Connect with The Burnout Panel: Aileen Axtmayer https://www.linkedin.com/in/aileenaxtmayer/ Cait Donovan https://www.linked.com/in/caitdonovan Sandra Lewis https://www.linkedin.com/in/sandraylewis/ Audrey Holst https://www.linkedin.com/in/audrey-holst/ Sharon Grossman https://www.linkedin.com/in/sharongrossman/ Vanessa Zamy https://www.linkedin.com/in/zamyvanessa/   XOXO, C   If you know that it's time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you've been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait   https://friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/quiz   Podcast production and show notes provided by HiveCast.fm

Today, Cait shares a podcast recommendation, an episode of Wellness While Walking Podcast, hosted by her friend Carolyn Cohen. Carolyn is a health coach that has designed her podcast as a way to inspire people to take the next step of their health journey. These episodes are 30 minutes long and are made to be listened to while taking a walk. There is even a handy beep at the halfway point in the episode to remind you to turn back around on your route. So, bundle up, put on some headphones, and take a stroll while learning wellness tips.    It may sound strange to think about wanting to increase stress, but there actually is good stress that can result in physical and mental health benefits. In the same way that too much of a good thing is bad and too much of a bad thing is still bad, there is a sweet spot somewhere in the middle for everything. People need a certain level of hormetic stressors to thrive. Hormetic stressors are intermittent stressors of a certain duration and strength that can have systemic benefits. Some examples of ways to increase hormetic stressors are through temperature like hot and cold therapies, intermittent fasting, and high intensity interval training. By increasing hormetic stress, you can have increased energy, improved health, and even slow the aging process.    Stress is not always a bad thing. Tune into today's episode of FRIED. The Burnout Podcast for an exciting podcast recommendation from Cait. Listen to hear an episode of Wellness While Walking Podcast hosted by Carolyn Cohen and learn about the ways certain stressors can actually be beneficial to your overall wellness.   Quotes  • “Sometimes we need to stress our systems for growth. And I'm not just talking about stress as we think of it, I'm talking about things like when we eat, what we eat, how we move, and other daily activities in our day. So tweaking them might give us more energy, improved health, and even could help slow aging.” (2:16-2:36 | Carolyn) • “The fact that adversity can be good is also a concept that rings true within health.” (7:37-7:42 | Carolyn) • “Stressing ourselves in one way likely has benefits across all our systems. So we can find the one thing that works for us and our health situation and our lifestyle and then it can often have systemic benefits.” (24:16-24:27 | Carolyn)  • “Biologically, the lack of acute stressors prevents the intermittent episodes of cellular “housecleaning” activities that slow aging. So we just have to keep in mind that taken to either extreme, the stressors are problematic, and so we need to be careful if we pursue any of these hormetic activities.” (25:29-25:48 | Carolyn) • “What I've always wanted to share here on the show is the question of nuance, just because a bit of something might be beneficial doesn't mean a whole lot better. And similarly, just because something is poison, or detrimental and extreme doesn't mean that the other extreme, there's none of this is optimal, either. There's nuance, there's dose to be considered. And sometimes that's not what we get from the headlines.” (27:00-27:22 | Carolyn)    Links Connect with Carolyn Cohen, Host of the Wellness While Walking Podcast https://wellnesswhilewalking.com/ XOXO, C   If you know that it's time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you've been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait   https://friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/quiz   Podcast production and show notes provided by HiveCast.fm

Dr. Sharon Grossman is a clinical psychologist turned burnout coach, an author, a speaker, and host of the Decode Your Burnout podcast. When she was a psychology student, she attended a workshop about what it is like to work in private practice. The speaker talked a lot about how prevalent burnout is in the private practice world and this actually caused Dr. Sharon to shy away from going in that direction for many years. Eventually there was nowhere left to go but management, which is not something she was interested in pursuing, and Dr. Sharon had to consider opening up her own practice. She decided to build in ways to protect against burnout right from the start such as choosing an office location within walking distance of her gym. She moved from therapy to burnout coaching and prefers it as in her experience her coaching clients are more dedicated to doing the work required to really improve.    In Dr. Sharon's research, she discovered that there are three main contributing factors to burnout- programming or early childhood experiences, environmental stressors, and burnout personality or profile. She helps people determine their burnout style in order to better understand what changes they need to make in order to heal from and prevent additional burnout. The three burnout personality types are thinker, feeler, and doer. Thinkers are people who are constantly overthinking everything. They tend to be perfectionists and struggle with imposter syndrome. Feelers are the people pleasers who tend to end up resentful when people inevitably don't give back as much as they receive. The doers are the people who constantly overfill their plate and who feel a deep need to be more accomplished than anyone and to continually prove themselves. By determining which one you are, you can better understand what caused your burnout and how to prevent it in the future.   There are many factors that contribute to burnout and not everyone burns out from the same circumstances. Tune into today's episode of FRIED. The Burnout Podcast for a conversation with Dr. Sharon Grossman about decoding your burnout. Learn which burnout profile applies to you so that you can have a better understanding of the lifestyle changes you need to make to heal from and prevent burnout.   Quotes • “The important thing is to really focus on what your needs are, and how do you get those needs met.” (12:03-12:08 | Dr. Sharon)  • “How is it that we're burning out, and we don't even have the words to describe it? We don't even have the right diagnosis, if you will. Which is important, because then you don't have the right treatment for the problem. So I kind of made it my mission to go out there and to educate the public about what burnout is and what to look out for so that people can identify it in themselves, so that they can get the appropriate kind of help or use the right kind of strategies and tools to get back to themselves.” (14:01-14:29 | Dr. Sharon) • “I remember as a therapist even just thinking my job is not to babysit people. I need to get them up and running so that they have social support, that they're out there doing what they need to do to take care of themselves, that they're not just showing up here for the next 12 years.” (23:23-23:39 | Dr. Sharon) • “Thinkers are focused on quality, because they're perfectionists. The doers are focused on quantities, like how much can I do, and it just never feels like it's enough. And so you're taking on another thing and another thing, and then eventually, you take on like the smallest little thing, and you break, because you just can't take anymore.” (30:57-31:21 | Dr. Sharon)   Links https://cuely.ai/FRIED https://bearaby.com Connect with Dr. Sharon Grossman: https://drsharongrossman.com/ https://www.instagram.com/theburnoutdoc/   https://www.linkedin.com/in/sharongrossman/ http://drsharongrossman.com/burnoutchecklist  https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/decode-your-burnout-formerly-optimize-your-life/id1548603864   XOXO, C   If you know that it's time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you've been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait   https://friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/quiz   Podcast production and show notes provided by HiveCast.fm

It might seem odd to even consider seeing burnout as something that could potentially benefit a company. However, when burnout occurs frequently enough in the same workplace it can serve as a handy red flag. If you keep quiet while experiencing burnout, it will be more difficult for your employer to recognize and address a potential systemic issue. When multiple employees experience burnout it may be an indicator of a larger issue at play such as a problem with the system or workplace culture that needs to change. In today's #straightfromcait episode, Cait, host and burnout speaker, explains why companies should pay attention to burnout and how burnout data can help companies to heal culture issues in the workplace.    Your burnout may be a symptom of a larger systemic issue, and companies should pay closer attention when they have burnt out employees. Sometimes burnout is an individual experience, but there is also organizational burnout that impacts multiple employees at once. By being up front with your employer about your burnout, they can use that information to discern whether widespread organizational change needs to be made. Research shows that burnout and “quiet quitting” are costing U.S. companies trillions of dollars. Employees with burnout are more likely to visit the emergency room and have higher medical costs overall. Companies can save major money by working toward burnout proofing cultures.    Burnout is often experienced silently which causes leaders to be blissfully unaware of any larger systemic issues that may be at play. Speaking up about your burnout experience can lead to others being more willing to also speak up. The more employees that are impacted, the more likely it is that a company will make dramatic organizational changes which can lead to a healthier workplace for all.  Quotes: · “If burnout is a symptom of a larger system malfunction, and in this case, the system is society at large as the macrocosm and the microcosm is being community, company, neighborhood, family and finally self, then shouldn't companies be paying closer attention to it so that they can find out where the system is causing more wear and tear than necessary?” (2:29-2:53 | Cait) · “When a system is adding to the burnout of multiple people within short timeframes, something is wrong. It's really normal to have one person burnout in a company that seems to work for everyone else. So maybe this company is doing everything it can and is really supportive and is really okay with making as much change as possible to support people. But there is something about it, about the system, about the culture, about the work that doesn't agree with a particular person. That doesn't necessarily mean that the system has to continue to change. That means that this is not the right relationship.” (4:07-4:48 | Cait)  · “In order for burnout to be a useful red flag for companies, people who are burning out or who are already burnt, fried crispy, need to be able to tell someone what's going on. It is not possible to use a symptom to diagnose a problem if the symptom doesn't make itself known or the symptom is ignored.” (5:37-5:55 | Cait) · “I just want you to consider the fact that by letting your company know that you're burnt out, by telling your story, by talking to other people within your company that you're experiencing burnout, you might be a trigger that helps more people to speak up, that would help your company to work through something and make a change further down the road.” (10:04-10:28 | Cait) · “The cost of providing support for burnt out employees and teams is far outweighed by the costs of not addressing burnout in your companies.” (12:32-12:41 | Cait)    Links    https://www.gallup.com/workplace/393497/world-trillion-workplace-problem.aspx https://www.linkedin.com/posts/ariannahuffington_what-will-hr-focus-on-in-2023-activity-6999358051849777152-vmm7?utm_source=share&utm_medium=member_desktop https://www.gallup.com/workplace/282659/employee-burnout-perspective-paper.aspx?thank-you-report-form=1 https://www.friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/post/straightfromcait-how-to-tell-people-about-your-burnout https://www.friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/post/newton-cheng-i-burned-out-in-corporate-and-stayed-this-is-how https://cuely.ai/fried https://bearaby.com XOXO, C   If you know that it's time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you've been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait   https://friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/quiz   Podcast production and show notes provided by HiveCast.fm

Zenica Chatman is a life coach with a professional background in journalism and communications. While working as a communication strategist in what she initially excitedly thought of as her dream job, Zenica became the victim of workplace bullying by her manager. She felt like she was really crushing it at work, and yet her manager found ways to make even her strengths seem like a bad thing. She was continually put down and told that she was the weakest team member regardless of her attempts to make improvements. Looking back at her performance evaluations and skills assessments, Zenica soon realized that there was no factual basis for any of the bullying she received about her job performance. After doing some research, Zenica learned that 30% of American workers report being the victim of workplace bullying.    “The new job did not heal me from the trauma that I experienced in the old job. That same person who didn't have any confidence, who was taking an hour to send simple emails, she went right on into that next job. And so there was a lot of inner work that I had to do in order to get back to the person that's talking to you today,” shares Zenica Chatman, life coach. If you are being bullied at work, you are at a higher risk of burnout. Between working harder to try to stay ahead of the criticism, stress over being talked down to, and the fear surrounding the possibility of needing to change jobs, there are a lot of factors that tend to pile up and cause burnout. Workplace bullying destroys confidence and often does not have a satisfying resolution from the company. It is important to learn how to move forward and heal from workplace bullying in order to succeed at your next job.    Workplace bullying is unfortunately a common experience, even with remote workers. Bullies often convince you to believe lies about yourself, so it is important to stay clear on the facts. Tune into today's episode of FRIED. The Burnout Podcast for a conversation with Zenica Chatman about how to recover from workplace bullying, so that it does not lead to burnout.    Quotes · “I was in an environment where even my strengths now are being used against me.” (8:07-8:11 | Zenica) · “That was the summer that George Floyd was murdered. And so it sparked this whole conversation in the workplace about diversity, equity, and inclusion. And I was in all of these different social media groups and on all these different chats, and I was hearing the stories of other women of color, mostly black women, who were having identical situations to me. And that was very scary to me, that these women that I didn't know in different states in different industries, we're all describing exactly the same scenario. And that just prompted me to say, is this a thing? Is workplace bullying a thing? Is that real, did I make that up? And come to find out, no, I didn't make it up. Actually, 30% of American workers report being bullied.” (8:42-9:32 | Zenica)  · “I think particularly when you're a woman in the workplace, and when you're a person of color, you know when you're being mistreated, but we all will start to lie to ourselves because we don't want to be that person. We don't want to be that person of color that says, ‘I think I'm being discriminated against,' for whatever reason.” (14:39-14:56 | Zenica) · “The new job did not heal me from the trauma that I experienced in the old job. That same person who didn't have any confidence, who was taking an hour to send simple emails, she went right on into that next job. And so there was a lot of inner work that I had to do in order to get back to the person that's talking to you today.” (24:05-24:29 | Zenica)  · “Once I saw on that StrengthsFinder that what they said was not true in black and white. They said I wasn't a good communicator, but my actual assessment says that I was. Went back through old assessments, communication was always at the top and never, ever, ever not been a great communicator. And I started to say, what other lies did they try to put in your spirit that are not true? And so I started to peel back all the lies and I got very clear about what was true.” (29:49-30:18 | Zenica) · “Those environments have a way of making you believe things about yourself that are not true. So what's the lie that your environment has tried to put on you that is absolutely not true? And then replace it with the actual truth.” (30:53-31:07 | Zenica) · “Usually, HR is not going to help you. So you have to learn how to validate the experience for yourself so that you can move forward without resolution from the company.” (31:56-32:09 | Zenica) · “Why am I going to kill myself for a job that if I die tomorrow, they won't even trouble themselves to call my mother and send her a card? Because now I have clarity on what is important to me, and I don't feel like I'm sacrificing anything when I set boundaries for myself.” (56:10-56:37 | Zenica)   Links   https://cuely.ai/FRIED   https://bearaby.com   Connect with Zenica Chatman: Website: https://www.zenicachatman.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/z_chatman/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thenapministry/?hl=en XOXO, C   If you know that it's time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you've been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait   https://friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/quiz   Podcast production and show notes provided by HiveCast.fm

It would be incredible if every time you were burned out, you could stop working and run off to rest in a magical Cinderella fantasyland where talking mice take care of all your problems. Unfortunately, that's not the case for most of us. It is not always possible to stop working when you are burned out, and actually by staying, you may be doing yourself a favor in the long run. If you take a break from the toxic environment that was causing your burnout and then try to go back when you are feeling better, it is likely you will end up burned out all over again. This is because regardless of how well rested you may feel, you did not take the time to do the work required to change the behavior that caused you to become burned out originally. In today's #straightfromcait episode, Cait explains how to recover from burnout while still working and why it may actually be a good idea to continue working while healing from burnout in certain cases.   There are both internal and external burnout causes and it is important to take a look at all of them when assessing how to move forward with burnout recovery. Cait recommends doing an Internal/External Burnout Risk Factors Assessment which can be found on the FRIED website in order to determine first steps. Some internal factors to consider are people-pleasing behaviors and perfectionism, whereas external factors are things like micromanagement and mismatched values. By taking a look at what factors are actually influencing your burnout, you can narrow it down and pick the easiest place to begin making changes. Instead of trying to do everything all at once and maximize your burnout recovery, slow down and take a step back. Focus on just one burnout cause from the list and make one small shift in your life at a time. The caveat to this is that if the external causes of your burnout are due to an inherently toxic work environment, you will need to formulate an exit strategy eventually. It is not possible to completely recover from burnout in a work environment where your mental health is perpetually under attack.   If you are burned out and unable to leave your job even temporarily, there are still ways to work on burnout recovery. Determine which internal and external factors apply to you and start making small shifts in your life based on those results. This way you are making small, manageable changes and not taking too much away from your energy that it leaves you depleted at work. By making the necessary behavioral shifts while still in your work environment, you may have a more smooth transition into burnout recovery than if you had taken a break or left your job. Quotes · “If you removed yourself from a situation that was requiring you to act in certain ways, and you didn't have to practice acting in better ways and shifting your behavior to protect yourself better, then when you go back into that environment you might not be prepared even if you're rested.” (4:58-5:16 | Cait) · “If you can't take time off work, you might really be doing yourself a favor by staying and working through some sh*t on the fly.” (8:15-8:22 | Cait)  · “The trick here, once again, is to do the easiest thing first. Allow it to have impact, and then move to the next easiest thing on the list. If you fill out your list, and you're not sure how to tackle any of your items, choose one of them and ask the Facebook group for ways to shift that behavior.” (15:12-15:30 | Cait) · “Asking for help and asking for other people's perspectives is one of the main ways we build resilience. So don't go this alone. If you're not sure what the answer is for you, let's do it together.” (15:36-15:49 | Cait) · “You cannot long term stay in a toxic environment and heal fully from burnout. Your physical and mental health will continue to deteriorate…Your best bet is to do everything within your power within the situation and then use whatever energy you create by making those changes to formulate a graceful exit strategy.” (17:00-17:33 | Cait) · “You're not going to find motivation when you're burned out just by looking for it. You're going to create energy by caring for yourself differently and by shifting the way you interact with your environment.” (19:40-19:52 | Cait)   Links    https://cuely.ai/FRIED https://womensmeditationnetwork.com/ https://bearaby.com   XOXO, C   If you know that it's time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you've been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait   https://friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/quiz   Podcast production and show notes provided by HiveCast.fm

Becca Powers is an award winning fortune 500 high tech sales executive, founder and CEO of Powers Peak Potential, a best selling author and a speaker. With over 20 years of high level sales experience, she spent most of her life being an overachiever and unwittingly drove herself into major burnout. Becca's burnout came after a particularly challenging sequence of 12 hour work days in a job where she was majorly overextending herself and unable to spend any time being there for her family. In hindsight, she recognizes that there were signs from her body mere months into the position telling her that it was not the right fit, but she dismissed those signs at the time. It took falling apart on the floor of her bathroom in a complete nervous breakdown after feeling like she was letting her children down for Becca to realize that change was overdue.    “Burnout ignites in feeling ‘undered' and whether that's undervalued, underpaid, under-resourced, under-recognized, under-appreciated. I mean, you can put the under attached to it but it triggers our worth or it triggers deeper feelings of being unseen, unheard and feeling like we don't matter. And when that happens, we ‘over',” shares Becca Powers. Becca grew up with hippie parents who were very involved in their band and party scene. She learned as a child that in order to gain her parent's love and attention she needed to overachieve. This feeling unknowingly followed Becca into adulthood and caused her to overcommit at work which ultimately led to her feeling undervalued. The pattern of going over and above and then feeling the ‘unders' is one that is very intrinsic to the burnout experience. The ‘overs' and ‘unders' can put you into a feedback loop that is difficult to extract yourself from.    When you find yourself feeling underappreciated, undervalued, or under-resourced, it is a sign that you need to implement healthy boundaries and take control back over your own energy. You do not have to overextend yourself constantly in order to have worth and it is okay to say no or ask for help. Tune into today's episode of FRIED. The Burnout Podcast for a conversation with Becca Powers about how the ‘unders' lead to the ‘overs' and what you can do to pull yourself out of that loop.  Quotes · “So many of us have the full plate and we don't really get to talk about it and we kind of be like, ‘Oh I'm okay'. Well, are you really? You got a full plate, it's okay not to be okay.” (4:53-5:03 | Becca) · “When I was broken on the bathroom floor, all of a sudden, I remembered that I was the CEO of my life… I remember thinking, ‘If I'm the CEO of my life, then I'm a lot more powerful in this situation than I thought'.” (7:45-8:09 | Becca) · “Is what I'm doing serving me or is it sabotaging me?” (9:54-9:56 | Becca) · “Burnout ignites in feeling undered and whether that's undervalued, underpaid, under resourced, under recognized under appreciated, I mean, you can put the under attached to it but it triggers our worth or it triggers deeper feelings of being unseen, unheard and feeling like we don't matter. And when that happens, we over.” (11:59-12:24 | Becca) · “For me to get the attention, love, and acceptance I wanted from my parents I had to overachieve. I had to do. I had to over a lot.” (15:19-15:29 | Becca) · “Burnout is a very external response to us seeking externally what we weren't able to either give ourselves internally or like you said to our childhood just didn't get. It's not programmed in us to know that we have the innate wisdom within to give ourselves everything that we need.” (20:16-20:37 | Becca) · “In hindsight, what I have learned is when I was surviving, my kids were surviving. And when I'm thriving, my kids are thriving.” (26:51-27:00 | Becca) · “By building boundaries, you can create space for other people's growth and success.” (34:25-34:31 | Cait) · “What is your role? And are the actions and responsibilities that you're doing supporting the role that you have and want in your life, whether it's at work or at home?” (38:19-38:31 | Becca)   Links   https://cuely.ai/FRIED https://womensmeditationnetwork.com/   Connect with Becca Powers https://www.instagram.com/beccapowers1313/ https://www.linkedin.com/in/beccapowers1313/ https://www.beccapowers.com/burnout XOXO, C   If you know that it's time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you've been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait   https://friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/quiz   Podcast production and show notes provided by HiveCast.fm

Quiet quitting is not a new concept, but has gotten a lot of attention recently after the pandemic shook up the job market. The basic idea of quiet quitting is being disengaged from your work and this can often be mistaken for burnout. The key difference is that quiet quitting is intentional, whereas if you are burned out, you are likely to be disengaged as a result rather than as a choice. In today's #straightfromcait episode, Cait explains quiet quitting vs. loud quitting, and the way resentment fuels disengagement.    Resentment is the primary emotion that leads to quiet quitting. This could be resentment for how you are being treated at work, resentment for being forced back into the office, resentment over your job role not being clear enough, or any multitude of reasons. If you are disengaged because you really don't feel like your current position is a good fit for you, it is best to loud quit rather than sticking around and growing more resentful. That resentment builds over time and can lead to burnout, so planning an exit strategy and leaving your job may be the best option for your long term mental health. If you need help working to transform your resentment and make a plan for moving forward, Cait has created the Resentment Journal specifically for that purpose which can be accessed from her website.   Sometimes your job or the company you are working for won't be the best fit for you. It does not always mean that there is something inherently wrong with you or the company. In those situations, it is best to form an exit strategy and leave to find a better fit. In other cases, your company may be willing to work with you to help better meet your needs, and it may come down to having a conversation with your boss or an HR professional to see what can be done. Regardless of the reason causing you to disengage, it is always best to loud quit versus quiet quitting, because in the long run quiet quitting will increase resentment and damage your mental health.   Quotes • “There are going to be situations where you and a company are just not a good fit. And it doesn't mean that either of you are bad or good.” (4:31-4:41 | Cait) • “If something's not a fit, just loud quit, get out of here, go do something else.” (5:38-5:43 | Cait) • “When you are burnt out and you find yourself in a situation similar to quiet quitting, I want you to understand that that's likely a coping mechanism and not necessarily part of an actual decision that you're making.” (6:34-6:46 | Cait) • “Quiet quitting as a short term coping mechanism, acceptable. Quiet quitting as a long term plan for life will destroy your mental health.” (10:15-10:25 | Cait)  • “If we start building enough courage to speak up about our needs, we will find quite often that people are willing to meet them.” (11:47-12:00 | Cait) “The emotion that sits behind quiet quitting is resentment. And the answer to that is creating space for and transforming that resentment.” (13:51-14:07 | Cait)   Links    https://www.caitdonovan.com/resentment-journal   https://cuely.ai/FRIED https://womensmeditationnetwork.com/ XOXO, C   If you know that it's time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you've been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait   https://friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/quiz   Podcast production and show notes provided by HiveCast.fm

Newton Cheng is the Director of Health and Performance at Google, a world champion powerlifter, and a father. Throughout his 14 year career at Google, he overworked himself due to people-pleasing tendencies and began getting misaligned from his priorities and values, leading Newton to take a mental health leave in January of 2022. In February of 2021 his symptoms of burnout, anxiety, and depression got to the point where he started to realize just how significant the toll on his mental health was. He found himself struggling to get out of bed and felt a lot of shame for how he was failing to show up the way he wanted to as a husband and father. However, it still took awhile for him to decide to go on leave, because it felt like giving up. When Newton returned to Google after his mental health leave, he decided to share his story and be very upfront about his experiences to help others who may be suffering alone.    “I was raised in a culture where we talked a lot about mental toughness and this felt like the opposite of that. But what I knew was I was not showing up the husband and father that I wanted to be, so something had to change,” shares Newton Cheng. When Newton started talking about his leave at work, he was a little surprised by how many of his co-workers chose to refer to it as a sabbatical. Mental health is still so stigmatized in today's society that people can feel uncomfortable even just saying the words out loud. However, this does a disservice to everyone who is suffering in silence and who just needs someone to listen and understand what they are going through. Newton had gotten to the point where he was unable to get out of bed and dreading going to work, even though he loved his job and felt his work was important to him. He was not able to be the father he wanted to be or the husband he wanted to be, and the shame ate away at him. As he began to share his mental health struggles more, Newton found that many of his co-workers of all levels across the organization were suffering from similar symptoms of burnout and depression. Many people who burn out in these situations choose to quit their job completely, but Newton's problem was not with the job, but rather with his approach and how he chose to structure his boundaries or lack of boundaries. Once he stepped back and reorganized his life to align better with his values and put boundaries in place that allowed him to spend more time with his family, Newton was able to break through his burnout and stay on at Google.    Burning out at work does not necessarily mean you have to change your job. Sometimes all you need is to take a step away and restructure how you are approaching your work so that it can align better with the lifestyle you want. Tune into today's episode of FRIED. The Burnout Podcast for a conversation with Newton Cheng about experiencing burnout in a corporate setting and how to move forward while keeping your job.    Quotes · “February 2021 was the first time I physically couldn't get out of bed. And I had read about this in terms of others experiences with mental health and depression, but I had never actually felt it. And it wasn't so much like a physical paralysis, it was overwhelming dread. So from there, I started seeing the employee assistance provider and he told me I was exhibiting early signs of burnout.” (7:18-7:42 | Newton) · “I was raised in a culture where we talked a lot about mental toughness, and this felt like the opposite of that. But what I knew was I was not showing up the husband and father that I wanted to be, so something had to change.” (10:13-10:30 | Newton) · “When I told people I was going on leave, people started calling it my sabbatical. And I kept reframing. I'm like, my ‘mental health leave'. And that was very interesting. I'm like, I think you're probably doing that out of respect, because you don't know my boundary there and I very much appreciate that, but I don't think that's helping anyone. It's not a sabbatical and people know it's not sabbatical. But if we call it a sabbatical, we're just reinforcing that we have to hide things.” (28:26-28:56 | Newton) · “If we don't name what's actually going on, we can't actually address it.” (29:18-29:21 | Newton) · “As I have shared my story, the people who have come to me privately to say, ‘I'm suffering too', they are people like me. They are people junior to me in organizations, they're my peers, they are above me. They're all around us.” (55:22-55:40 | Newton)  · “If you are suffering and you're in a situation similar to me, you are not alone.” (55:49-55:53 | Newton) · “To leaders who are in a position like mine, change doesn't happen, transformation doesn't happen without true leadership. True leadership requires those of us with the privilege to take some risks, to try some things, maybe to take some things and fail. But we got to do it and we got to share what we learn. And that's how we're going to move forward.” (56:06-56:25 | Newton)   Links   https://cuely.ai/FRIED https://womensmeditationnetwork.com/   Connect with Newton Cheng: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/newtoncheng/?hl=en LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/newtoncheng/   https://caitdonovan.com/resentment-journal https://www.friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/post/jim-young-ceo-dad-burnout-emotional-gold-digging-and-why-relationships-matter   Resource Newton Mentions: Byron Katie: https://thework.com/ XOXO, C   If you know that it's time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you've been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait   https://friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/quiz   Podcast production and show notes provided by HiveCast.fm

“Just keep going, it will change.” This is Elizabeth Collins's burnout story, simplified into six words. The Cait-proclaimed Burnout Witch, Elizabeth now specializes in helping others recover from burnout. However, she was only able to truly thrive in this role after confronting her own feelings of not-enough-ness and developing the boundaries and coping skills she needed to regain a sense of balance in both body and brain.    Elizabeth is the owner and director of The East West Company, an integrative wellness practice specializing in burnout recovery coaching, functional medicine, acupuncture and more. Elizabeth explains that functional medicine is a crossover between biomedicine and Eastern medicine; it uses a wide range of testing to identify and address the root cause of a presenting issue. Because the incredible breadth of functional medicine testing can seem overwhelming to someone who is burnt out, Elizabeth suggests starting simple with a blood panel and a stool test. This approach helps individuals correct any initial imbalances, which sets them on a more manageable path towards burnout recovery.   Tune into this week's episode of FRIED. The Burnout Podcast to hear more about the intersections between functional medicine and burnout. Learn about the ins and outs of leaky gut, why Elizabeth uses tarot cards to broaden her clients' perspectives, and why feelings of gratitude and frustration can and should co-exist.   Quotes “I had ‘Big T' trauma, so that very much set me up for a lifetime of perfectionism, a lifetime of not really understanding that I am worthy of love simply because I exist.” (04:00-04:10) “My burnout story was: ‘just keep going, it will change.'” (07:26-07:32)  “That happens to people who are chronic people pleasers, who are prone to burnout….It's very easy for you to set aside what you like because you're more concerned about what needs to happen now, and it's like, but what you like is what needs to happen now!” (10:49-11:05) “[Functional medicine] is kind of like if biomedicine and Eastern medicine had a baby.” (15:14-15:17) “When we're in burnout, it's very difficult to see anything other  than what we're focusing on, which is usually panic, stress and anxiety. And the benefit when I started reading my own tarot cards again was...oh, this card popped up and it means this. How does that relate to my current situation? What is it about this card that can give me the opportunity to stop focusing on the minutia and look at the bigger picture?” (31:28-31:55)  “Being able to address different aspects of your personality and speak to them directly like they're individuals gives a sense of agency to the experience, and it really gives people the opportunity to fully integrate those personalities.” (36:28-36:42) “We are complicated enough individuals that we can feel very bad about something that we're going through and still be very grateful for the good things that it gives us or the other good things in our life….They're not mutually exclusive, and the idea that we have to inhabit one thing at any given time is unsustainable and unfair and will absolutely perpetuate burnout.” (38:00-38:28) “If you have symptoms or you are living a life that is in your experience suboptimal, but in the greater perspective not catastrophic....you are not crazy, and there is help.” (49:10-49:35)   Links https://insighttimer.com/  www.theeastwestco.com  www.instagram.com/theeastwestco  www.instagram.com/thevintagemystic    XOXO, C   If you know that it's time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you've been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait

Are you always trying to meet other people's expectations, even when those expectations may not be completely clear? Unclear expectations for a role, whether that be in relation to a job or a relationship, can reduce feelings of psychological safety and increase the potential for burnout. In today's #straightfromcait episode, Cait explains the research behind why external expectations and role ambiguity play a role in burnout and how to ask for clarity when it is lacking.    When you are having to guess at someone's expectations, you will end up feeling on edge and pushing yourself harder and harder trying to reach that unspecified goal. Research shows that role ambiguity, or a lack of clarity in your job role, can come into play not only at work, but also within relationships at home and with friends. When you are able to predict how another person will react and set up expectations for yourself relative to that predicted outcome, your feelings of safety will increase and your risk of burnout will decrease. By simply having a conversation that focuses on clarifying and setting expectations, you can improve overall communication and increase your own internal feelings of safety.   It is exhausting trying to meet expectations all the time, especially if the expectations you are trying to meet are unclear or simply a guess on your part. In order to gain clarity, improve your relationships, and reduce overall stress, it is important to communicate effectively. Tune into this week's #straightfromcait episode for a conversation about how to determine other's actual expectations. Learn why assuming other's expectations can lead to burnout and how to ask for clarity.  RESEARCH: Maslach et. al. (2001). Job burnout. Annu Rev Psychol. 52. 397-422.  Quotes · “If you are feeling unclear about someone's expectations, and you are guessing at them, and you never quite get feedback on whether or not you're hitting the target, you're always going to feel on edge. And you're always going to push for doing things a little bit harder, a little bit more intense, to a better degree, to a higher degree. It'll never stop because you don't know when you've met the expectation.” (3:54-4:20 | Cait) · “Burnout recovery happens when we increase our feelings of safety internally and externally.” (5:41-5:46 | Cait)  · “You are more likely to experience burnout while also experiencing role ambiguity, a lack of clarity in your job role.” (7:06-7:14 | Cait) · “Sharing with someone what your thinking is behind the situation gives them a better idea of how you're looking at it and what's happening in your world, so that they can respond appropriately.” (10:33-10:44 | Cait)   Links    https://caitdonovan.com https://friedtheburnoutpodcast.com https://facebook.com/groups/friedtheburnoutpodcast XOXO, C   If you know that it's time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you've been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait   https://friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/quiz   Podcast production and show notes provided by HiveCast.fm

Farnoosh Torabi is an award winning personal finance journalist, author, keynote speaker, television reporter, and host of the So Money podcast. She uses her 20 years of experience to help people master their money. While living in New York City with her husband, she realized that changes needed to be made to their lifestyle to reduce stress and improve their overall quality of life. They ended up deciding to move out of the city to save money, which ultimately reduced stress and opened up more time for other opportunities. Now Farnoosh helps everyone from entrepreneurs to influencers learn how to manage their finances and make the most of their money.   “When I was a little girl, I thought two things equaled freedom, and I don't think I was wrong. Money in the bank and a driver's license,” shares Farnoosh Torabi. She explains that having money literally puts you in the driver's seat of your own life. It provides you with agency over your decisions that no one else can question. A lot of entrepreneurs are glamorized for taking big risks, maxing out their credit cards, and starving themselves while they try to get their business running. This should not be the norm at all. Instead, it is better to not treat it like a race and to spend as much time as necessary building financial security prior to starting a business. There are many opportunities to earn money nowadays outside of a traditional 9 to 5. You can make extra money by taking up an hourly gig, pet sitting, selling unwanted items on Facebook Marketplace, babysitting, or in any number of ways. The most important thing is to reframe your idea of success and of what a job is supposed to be and recognize that a job can truly be just a job. You do not have to monetize your passions or be extremely emotionally invested in your job.    There are a lot of misconceptions about finances and it is important to be innovative when it comes to finding ways to make and save money. People are living longer and retirement at 60 is no longer the goal for everyone, nor is it necessarily attainable. However, a pension is not the only way to secure financial stability for your future and it is vital to save money regardless, because that pension is not guaranteed in today's world. Tune into today's episode of FRIED. The Burnout Podcast for a conversation with Farnoosh Torabi about how to build financial safety, when to quit a job and when to stick it out, and creative ways to make extra money.    Quotes · “I remember picking up a book called The Upside of Stress. Because I was like, I need to learn how to live with this. I don't think this is going away.” (7:09-7:17 | Farnoosh) · “Changing your definition of success is one of the key factors in creating a burnout proof life after you've recovered. Because you can't go back to the system that you were in. You are not going to build enough resilience to live in that system as it is unless some of it changes.” (14:44-15:02 | Cait) · “When you are burned out at work, maybe the response is not to quit, but rather, ‘Have you even had a conversation with your manager?' And so you don't have to throw out the baby with the bathwater. You don't have to think, 'Well, my only option is to quit and lose everything that I've worked towards.'” (20:46-21:02 | Farnoosh)  · “When you feel behind in your 40s, don't let that discourage you from just continuing the good work of putting the consistent money into that bank account, into that investment account, because it is never too late.” (28:47-29:01 | Farnoosh) · “When I was a little girl, I thought two things equaled freedom, and I don't think I was wrong. Money in the bank, and a driver's license.” (41:22-41:30 | Farnoosh) · “Don't tell me that money doesn't earn you safety. It at least buys you the opportunity to make choices for yourself that nobody else can enforce. It gives you agency.” (43:40-43:51 | Farnoosh) · “Sometimes it's really about a reframe, and thinking like, ‘Okay, well, this job, I'm grateful for the fact that I can do it. The paycheck comes every two weeks. I get benefits. I get some paid time off. And then I can go and live the other life that I have.” (47:18-47:33 | Farnoosh)   Links   Connect with Farnoosh Torabi: http://www.somoneypodcast.com http://www.instagram.com/farnooshtorabi https://www.cnet.com/feature/signup-so-money/ https://cuely.ai/FRIED  XOXO, C   If you know that it's time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you've been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait   https://friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/quiz   Podcast production and show notes provided by HiveCast.fm

There are many risk factors for burnout. The good news is that each risk factor is multidirectional and by working on any one of them, you are likely to positively change others. It can feel overwhelming to confront all of the risk factors for burnout, so in today's #straightfromcait episode, Cait breaks them all down into six overarching categories. These categories are workplace, family, self, culture, environment, and health.    Here in the United States there is an extreme amount of pressure and importance placed on hard work and individuality. The issue with these being the major cultural values is that overworking can and does quite literally cause death through having an overall negative impact on long-term health. In addition, relying completely on yourself to accomplish every single thing and not leaning into the strength of our communities is a large contributor to eventual burnout. When considering burnout, the majority of research comes from workplace studies, however, there are several other categories to consider for a broader view. How you were raised, the family you have currently, the environment you live and work in, and your physical and mental health conditions all contribute toward burnout in their own ways. By setting aside time for self care, making necessary lifestyle changes, and really considering each of the burnout risk factors that you identify with, you can make lasting and significant changes that help you to prevent or heal from burnout.    The risk factors for burnout are too numerous to count, but they do all tend to fall into six main interconnected categories. By making improvements in one area, you are likely influencing several others at the same time. Tune into this week's #straightfromcait episode for a conversation about the six categories of burnout risk factors. Learn what to keep an eye out for and what changes to make in order to positively influence your burnout recovery or even to prevent burnout before it occurs.    Quotes · “We might be talking about some sort of family trauma, and you have to know that that affects your environment. And that also affects your health. And it also affects your sense of self and how you function in the world. Right? So there's a lot going on here. Everything affects everything else.” (4:28-4:45 | Cait) · “A study that was combined between the World Health Organization and the International Labor Org showed that working 55 plus hours a week resulted in approximately three quarters of a million deaths over the course of a year through stroke and heart attack mostly. And this was shown to be especially true for those over 45.” (5:38-5:59 | Cait) · “If it is an epigenetic change, we can affect change on it. Because epigenetics are fluid, right? We can move them, they can change. But it does require a lot of self care.” (12:20-12:31 | Cait) · “If you did not have access to or take advantage of access to green space, being in nature, your overall health will suffer and your energy will suffer and increase your risk of burnout.” (12:58-13:09 | Cait)   Links  https://caitdonovan.as.me/free https://caitdonovan.as.me/inquiry   These references should be in the show notes: REFERENCES Bar, M., & Maital, N. (2007) Visual elements of subjective preference modulate amygdala activation.” Neuropsychologia. 45(10). pp. 2191-2200. 10.1016/j.neuropsychologia.2007.03.008. Berk, L. (2019). Exploring Adult and Adolescent Development. Pearson. Cht 3. Huberman Lab. (2022). Using light to optimize health. https://hubermanlab.com/using-light-sunlight-blue-light-and-red-light-to-optimize-health/ Ishizu, T., and Semir Z. (2011). Toward a brain-based theory of beauty. PLOS One, https://doi.org/10.1371/journal.pone.0021852. Maslach, C., Schaufeli, W.B., Leiter, M.P. (2001). Job burnout. Annual Reviews of Psychology. 52. 397-422 World Health Organization. (2021). Long working hours increasing deaths from heart disease and stroke. https://www.who.int/news/item/17-05-2021-long-working-hours-increasing-deaths-from-heart-disease-and-stroke-who-ilo XOXO, C   If you know that it's time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you've been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait   https://friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/quiz   Podcast production and show notes provided by HiveCast.fm

Nicole Kalil is a speaker, leadership strategist, respected coach, author, and podcast host. She spent 15 years working for a financial planning company where she was frequently the only woman in the room. After so many years of working hard for promotions, pushing down her feminine qualities in favor of leaning into more stereotypically masculine traits, Nicole realized she no longer even knew who she was authentically anymore. She had become so burned out that she hated her job, hated the people around her, and had lost herself in endless people-pleasing. Now Nicole helps other women to put aside gender expectations, regain their confidence, and learn to hear and trust their inner voices so that they can live authentically.    “Our confidence lives inside of us, and it's accessible anytime we want. We have just been socialized and received messaging to the contrary pretty much our whole lives,” explains Nicole Kalil. Due to the way girls are often socialized while growing up, many women falsely believe that confidence is something that exists externally. So much of societal conditioning tells women that confidence can be found by dressing a certain way, behaving a certain way, having perfect children, or having the right job. Nicole refers to this as the ‘confidence con', because the truth is that confidence exists within everyone and it is accessible as soon as we choose to trust ourselves. The first step to regaining confidence is to learn how to listen for your inner voice and how to differentiate it from ‘head trash' or how Nicole refers to the bullying voice that exists within our minds, usually consisting of mean statements from others. The easiest way to differentiate head trash from your true inner voice is that head trash is always mean. If you are speaking to yourself in a way that you'd never speak to a loved one, that is head trash.    We have been conditioned all our lives to believe that confidence exists externally and that we have to fit into certain societal standards in order to deserve it. The truth is that we are all deserving of confidence and it lives within us, ready for us to tap into at any time. Tune into today's episode of FRIED. The Burnout Podcast for a conversation with Nicole Kalil about the confidence con, how to differentiate head trash from your inner voice, and how to compost or recycle head trash into something that can help rather than hinder your growth.    Quotes · “I didn't know who I was authentically anymore. And I was hating my work, was hating the people I was doing it with, through no fault of their own, just because I had put myself in this position where I tried to show up and please everyone else, but myself.” (5:49-6:06 | Nicole) · “I think women far too often are waiting to be ready. They're waiting for the fear and the nervousness to go away and only have excitement and readiness. And I'm like, oh, gosh, we're waiting too long.” (12:34-12:48 | Nicole) · “Our confidence lives inside of us, and it's accessible anytime we want. We have just been socialized and received messaging to the contrary pretty much our whole lives.” (13:45-13:55 | Nicole)  · “I would encourage you to think about how you build trust with another person or how somebody else builds trust with you. That's probably going to give you the best insight into how you build trust with yourself.” (38:47-38:57 | Nicole)   Links   Connect with Nicole Kalil: www.nicolekalil.com https://nicolekalil.com/book https://www.instagram.com/nicolemkalil/ https://www.linkedin.com/in/nicolekalil/ http://eepurl.com/gOrQLL Join our community!      XOXO, C   If you know that it's time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you've been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait   https://friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/quiz   Podcast production and show notes provided by HiveCast.fm

Highly sensitive people often assume they are simply wired that way from birth and that there is nothing that can be done to change their sensitivity. In this week's #straightfromsarah episode, FRIED Burnout Coach Sarah Vosen discusses changes in her sensitivity levels that she has experienced since recovering from burnout and the potential for negative effects of high sensitivity to lessen as the nervous system heals.  Chronic stress can cause our nervous system to get stuck in a feedback loop of more and more stress that ultimately leads to burnout. If you already have a higher level of sensitivity, burnout is going to be an even more likely result of chronic stress and troubling experiences. Sarah explains the six defining characteristics of highly sensitive people and how these characteristics have diminished throughout her healing journey. These characteristics are needing more time and space for processing experiences, differential susceptibility, overstimulation, empathy, emotional responsiveness, and awareness of subtle stimuli.  Although some aspects of high sensitivity may not entirely go away upon healing from burnout, there is strong evidence to suggest that as healing occurs, certain characteristics decrease. Tune into this week's #straightfromsarah episode to learn more about each of the six characteristics of highly sensitive people and to discover how they relate to your own journey as you are healing from burnout.  Quotes · “If we have had troubled lives, we are more susceptible to feeling the things we deem negative stronger and are prone to more anxiety and depression than others. But if we've had an easier life, we are more susceptible to feeling the things we've labeled as positive like joy and happiness more strongly.” (7:43-8:00 | Sarah) · “When you step back and look at your life, has the course of it had an overall ongoing positive trend or continuously negative one? Since we're all here and fried, perhaps the latter resonates most which would qualify us as an example of differential susceptibility.” (8:28-8:44 | Sarah) · “There's a part of our brain that determines whether our nervous system responds sympathetically or parasympathetically due to our present circumstances. It's called the reticular activating system and it's a part of the brainstem.” (9:48-10:00 | Sarah) · “When we're chronically stressed, this part of our brainstem gets stuck firing the sympathetic pathways, keeping us in the stress loop, which fries our nervous system and leads to the burnout we have all experienced. In order to stop this cycle, we need to give our brain location info about our body and space.” (10:15-10:31 | Sarah) · “In my recovery process, it's now easier to discern what I can control and what I am responsible for taking care of. I still can't witness a struggling human or plant right in front of me and not want to help. The difference is that I have awareness of my savior tendencies and I know how to ask people if they want my help instead of offering unsolicited advice.” (13:07-13:29 | Sarah) · “I've realized that as much as I used to feel validated by the idea that my high sensitivity was just how I was wired and wasn't something that I needed to fix, I am currently pleasantly surprised and quite relieved that the hardest parts of being highly sensitive have minimized.” (18:36-18:51 | Sarah) Links  Holistic Biomechanics classes: https://transformationspdx.com Highly sensitive person website: https://hsperson.com Sarah's contact: sarahvosen@gmail.com Book a call with Sarah: https://caitdonovan.as.me/sarah XOXO, C If you know that it's time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you've been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait https://friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/quiz Podcast production and show notes provided by HiveCast.fm Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Dr. Crystal Frazee is a burnout recovery and stress resilience coach with 16 years of experience. She grew up in the South raised by strong, independent women with the ingrained mindset that women were supposed to take on everything themselves and be able to have it all. She spent many years working as a yoga teacher and yoga therapist and had a keen sense of bodily awareness. When she started to notice a disconnect between being able to feel and notice her own bodily sensations and emotions, Dr. Frazee knew something was wrong. She was suddenly unable to even feel her young children against her on the couch and that being a big wake up call. She was working in healthcare on the frontlines at the height of the pandemic while also running her coaching business, raising two kids, being the breadwinner, and managing chronic illness. Trying to take on everything by herself, as she was raised to think she had to do, was causing Dr. Frazee to mentally disconnect from her body.  “The more we stand up for ourselves, and understand our own limits, and why this is so important, and why we don't need somebody else from outside to give us permission for this, we claim it and that's how the change happens,” explains Dr. Crystal Frazee. Burnout recovery truly takes place within the body and in order to heal, you must get out of your head and reconnect with your bodily sensations. Women in particular have grown up attuned to the needs of others and told to be quiet and not get in the way, so there is relearning required to begin allowing yourself to have boundaries and standing up for your own needs.  Women, especially those who are high achieving, often train themselves to ignore their bodily needs and signals which contributes to burnout. In order to begin really healing, it is vital to reconnect with your body and really become literate in how it communicates with you. Tune into today's episode of FRIED. The Burnout Podcast for a conversation with Dr. Crystal Frazee about body literacy, combating internalized scripts, and learning to actually fulfill your own needs.  Quotes · “When I was laying with my small children, which at the time were like one and almost four. I couldn't feel them. Like I couldn't feel the connectedness with their body from my body, which I had always previously been able to feel and that was kind of a real big like, wow, what is going on here?” (4:35-4:58 | Dr. Frazee) · “You could do a body scan, you could list off lots of physical sensations and people are usually really good at pointing out pain. But also, there's an emotional layer to your being. So what emotions are you feeling? Which can be conflicting, you can be grieving and you can have gratitude at the same time.” (11:33-11:51 | Dr. Frazee) · “We're not intended to live in crisis management as a lifestyle. It's a short term response. I think it was just really like, I've got to do this by myself and it's all on me. That was just kind of what I kept coming back to.” (23:19-23:35 | Dr. Frazee) · “That work of getting support with your burnout means that you're not just living in your head, that you can be in your body, and that you can learn what those signs are that you really do need to pay attention to.” (29:11-29:21 | Dr. Frazee)  · “The more we stand up for ourselves, and understand our own limits, and why this is so important, and why we don't need somebody else from outside to give us permission for this, we claim it and that's how the change happens.” (37:47-38:01 | Dr. Frazee) Links Connect with Dr. Crystal Frazee: Instagram | https://www.instagram.com/drcrystalfrazee/ LinkedIn | https://www.linkedin.com/in/drcrystalfrazee/ Website | https://crystalfrazee.ck.page/ XOXO, C If you know that it's time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you've been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait https://friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/quiz Podcast production and show notes provided by HiveCast.fm Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

During the process of burnout recovery, you are likely to overdo it and cause yourself to feel fatigued. This is perfectly natural as you are re-learning how to interact with your environment, relationships, and your body in a healthier way. As you explore these boundaries to your own energy, you will slowly start to recognize them more and more and be able to better understand your body's signals. In today's #straightfromcait episode, Cait explains how to handle the frustration that comes with feeling fatigued and how to test the limits of your energy.  Recovery is not only about resting, but also about re-learning how to interact with the world around you in a way that does not leave you totally drained. It is inevitable that you will end up bumping into these boundaries many times along your recovery journey and this can cause problems if you allow frustration to be your main take away. Instead, look at these instances as learning opportunities for you to collect data on how your body works. The more times you bump into those boundaries, the more you will start to recognize them and understand the messages your body is trying to send you.  Being in burnout recovery does not mean that you will never experience fatigue or overwhelm again. It is completely normal to find yourself hitting the limits of your energy at times. Tune into this week's #straightfromcait episode for a conversation about learning how to be more in tune with the energy within your body. Learn how to turn frustration into curiosity, so that you can ultimately benefit from feeling those invisible boundaries.  Quotes · “In the beginning of recovery, you will need to try to find your boundaries when it comes to energy. This means that sometimes you're going to overdo it and that will help you learn what overdoing it feels like in this recovery state. You'll have to bump up against boundaries to know where they are.” (2:10-2:28 | Cait)  · “Part of burnout recovery is resting and understanding that your body actually needs that rest. But part of burnout recovery is relearning how to interact with the world in a way that will not drain you so much.” (3:43-3:56 | Cait) · “You might not be able to feel anything or describe anything right away, but with practice, you'll start noticing some clues that were previously hidden that you can now use to help yourself.” (5:42-5:55 | Cait) · “The more time you spend bumping up against these invisible boundaries to your energy, the more fluent you will become in the language of energy in your own body.” (6:18-6:31 | Cait) · “Recovery is not just about rest. It's about relearning how to interact with your environment, with your life, with yourself, with your friends, with your relationships. It requires upgrading and in order to upgrade, we need to know where our baseline is. And in order to know where the baseline is, we need to be paying attention to it. So bump up against those boundaries. You aren't really starting over, you're just learning.” (7:48-8:20 | Cait) XOXO, C If you know that it's time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you've been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait https://facebook.com/groups/friedtheburnoutpodcas, https://caitdonovan.com/speaking https://friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/quiz Podcast production and show notes provided by HiveCast.fm Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Martha Bodyfelt is a divorce recovery coach with an extensive military background. She spent decades suffering from burnout after enlisting in the military at 23, dealing with immigration difficulties for her Iranian now-ex husband, and experiencing secondary PTSD from handling the internal allegations of sexual harassment and assault made by fellow female military personnel. After a terrible training accident where she injured her spine so badly that it was a miracle she was not paralyzed, Martha was medically discharged from the army and moved to DC where she took on a job as a defense contractor. Her own burnout combined with that of her then-husband resulted in divorce, because they both knew they would be unable to heal if they stayed together. After the divorce, she took time away from work to travel around Asia and try to reset herself. However, when she returned she found herself back in the same stressful work environment in DC and realized something drastic had to change. She quit her job and spent time working on herself in therapy and ultimately decided to lean into her side hustle, divorce coaching. Now she has helped thousands of women empower themselves and prides herself in giving a voice back to the women that are often ignored or silenced by society. “You always have options. Your career will sometimes gaslight you into thinking that you don't, but you do,” shares Martha Bodyfelt. In order to embrace burnout recovery, it is important to put yourself in an abundance mindset; because if you remain in a scarcity mindset, you will be resistant to change. Working a job that treats you poorly and causes both your relationships and health to suffer is just going to do more damage the longer you stay. You have permission to create an exit strategy and to get out of that toxic situation, whether it is a job or a relationship, and to start living for yourself.  Women are often disempowered in the workplace and in their relationships, because of societal pressures to always behave a certain way. In order to heal from burnout, you must put yourself first and reclaim your voice. Tune into today's episode of FRIED. The Burnout Podcast for a conversation with Martha Bodyfelt about life after divorce, toxic workplaces, and saying goodbye to the “good girl” mentality.  Quotes · “The divorce coaching and the dating coaching was calling to me, but there's that ego because I want to make that money and it might be a while before I recoup that. And so working with energy work and with human design folks, and things like that, and even my therapist saying, your body's gonna let you know when the time is ready. And I was like, Well, I don't know what that means, though. But in one fucking weekend, I started having that PTSD and anxiety attack. And I'm like, well, it's ready.” (17:40-18:11 | Martha) · “I think the best advice I can give is, no job is going to love you back.” (23:16-23:23 | Martha) · “Think about putting yourself in abundance and not scarcity and understanding that you always have options. Your career will sometimes gaslight you into thinking that you don't, but you do. And that's the same with relationships, too.” (28:51-29:05 | Martha) · “You have the right and, at this point, the responsibility to get to the fucking point and let people know what you want. Because nobody's here to save you. Nobody but you is going to advocate for you.” (41:32-41:50 | Martha) Links Connect with Martha Bodyfelt: Website | https://marthabodyfelt.com/ Instagram | https://www.instagram.com/marthabodyfelt/ LinkedIn | https://www.linkedin.com/in/coach-martha-b-306516215/ Schedule time with Martha | https://marthabodyfelt.com/schedule XOXO, C If you know that it's time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you've been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait https://friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/quiz Podcast production and show notes provided by HiveCast.fm Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Guided meditation is a great way to center yourself by reconnecting with your body and the Earth around you. Meditation provides a safe space for your body to heal and replenish itself while keeping your mind clear enough for you to receive messages from your heart. In this week's #straightfromsarah episode, FRIED Burnout Coach Sarah Vosen guides listeners through a meditation for grounding, filling up the body with energy, and creating a protected space.  Often burnout occurs after a long period of ignoring the messages being sent by your body. When you slow down and meditate, those messages can actually come through and provide clarity on situations where you may have otherwise struggled. Meditation does not require you to have perfect posture or to measure your inhales and exhales. It is best to get into whatever is the most comfortable position for you. Really listen to what feels right for your body and go with it. Use your inhales and exhales to bring the nourishing energy from the Earth into your body and to release the negative energies that are no longer serving your interests. When your mind is quiet and you have created a sphere of protection around yourself, then is the best time to ask yourself any question that you need direction on. Listen for the answer from your body, from your heart, instead of from your mind. It may not sound like a conventional answer, so be open to receiving answers that may seem illogical or that may appear in sounds or pictures in your brain rather than clear thoughts or words.  Meditation is a great method for reconnecting with yourself, because it can be done from anywhere and requires no tools. Tune into this week's #straightfromsarah episode to experience a guided meditation and learn how to use meditation on your healing journey.  Quotes · “The best way to do this meditation is however you will be the most comfortable in whatever position provides you with relief in this moment.” (2:05-2:13 | Sarah) · “If you have a question that's been spinning around or a decision that you need to make, answering it from this meditation space is often much easier. Because we're not being bombarded with other people's shoulds and energy. We can just ask ourselves the question and we can just listen for the answer. See if you can listen for the answer to just arrive from your heart, from your body, rather than from your mind.” (13:43-14:14 | Sarah)  · “Sometimes, when we get answers from our body, from our heart, the answers come in pictures, or colors, or sounds rather than words.” (14:50-15:00 | Sarah) · “Trust that what you get is correct for you.” (15:19-15:21 | Sarah) Links  https://caitdonovan.as.me/sarah https://friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/quiz XOXO, C If you know that it's time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you've been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait Podcast production and show notes provided by HiveCast.fm Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Sophia Lepage is a feminine embodiment and leadership coach who has spent the last 4 years helping women break free from the good girl mentality, reclaim pleasure, reconnect with their femininity, and recover from burnout. Sophia lived her entire early life trying to be a “good girl” at the expense of herself. She got so caught up in people-pleasing to avoid conflict and the potential of being the outcast that she lost sight of who she was and what she really wanted for her life. When an affair ended her marriage, the good girl facade fell apart, and Sophia had to start listening to her true deeper feelings and desires in order to rebuild her life into one that actually reflects her own goals and values. She went traveling and began an internal healing journey that ultimately led not only to her own recovery, but to helping others. She now lives in Bali with her second husband and helps women by teaching them to reconnect with their feminine power.  “When we come into that space of alignment then it's easier to attract those people who are our tribe. And it's easier to not get caught up in these other people who don't agree with you, because you're not going to please everyone,” shares Sophia Lepage. The pressure of always having to be the “good girl” causes many women to hide their true selves around others. This leads to burnout, because it is a huge energy drain to live out of alignment with yourself. By tapping into feminine energy, reconnecting with your intuition, and really listening to your body, you can break free from burnout and live a more authentic life. Often by the time burnout occurs, the body has been sending distress signals for ages. It is vital to learn how to be fully present in your body in order to recognize the signals coming from within.  People-pleasers tend to end up burned out, because they live based on the desires of others instead of honoring their own values and desires. Tune into today's episode of FRIED. The Burnout Podcast for a conversation with Sophia Lepage about reconnecting with feminine energy, reclaiming pleasure, and saying goodbye to always having to be a “good girl”.  Quotes · “The thing that helped me was discovering feminine embodiment practices, discovering pleasure practices. That's what helped me get back into connection with my body, started listening to her rhythms. Once I learned how to circulate pleasure, it opened up these wells of vitality and radiance that I didn't know that I had the capability to feel.” (5:00-5:22 | Sophia)  · “I've invested so much time and energy into making sure that everybody likes me. But do I like me? Who am I doing this for?” (10:22-10:34 | Sophia)  · “When we come into that space of alignment, then it's easier to attract those people who are our tribe. And it's easier to kind of not get caught up in these other people who don't agree with you, because you're not going to please everyone. It's just impossible.” (15:55-16:11 | Sophia) · “The deeper longing of my soul, the real desire, was to really reach my full potential in this life, which isn't about getting all the A-pluses, it's about being fully expressed.” (22:22-22:37 | Sophia) Links Connect with Sophia Lepage: Website | https://sophialepage.com/     Instagram | https://www.instagram.com/sophia_le_page/ https://sophialepage.com/fem-embodiment-for-burnout/ XOXO, C If you know that it's time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you've been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait https://friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/quiz Podcast production and show notes provided by HiveCast.fm Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

No one likes to feel guilty. Most often people will choose resentment over guilt, because it feels easier to blame someone else than it does to process their guilt. Resentment takes a large toll on relationships and overall mental health and can worsen burnout. In today's #straightfromcait episode, Cait explains how to skip over the resentment stage and instead process your guilt in order to be better protected from burnout long term.  Resentment occurs when you do an action you don't agree with in an attempt to prevent guilt. By choosing guilt over resentment, you can avoid a lot of extra stressors. Guilt occurs when you choose to do an action that goes against your internalized morality. However, often what we think of as our morals are not actually entirely our own. They are influenced by what we have been taught, by our culture, our family, our education and experiences and may not reflect what we actually believe in our hearts to be true. In order to process your guilt, you'll need to examine your morals and really think about which ones you still align with. Write down the action that has caused you guilt, examine whether or not it is actually immoral to you, and explore why you feel that way. Then give yourself the grace in that moment to realize that you are still a good person regardless of your findings and that you don't always need to feel guilty for choosing yourself over your preconceived morals.  Tune into this week's #straightfromcait episode for a conversation about resentment and guilt. Learn why it is better to choose guilt over resentment and how to properly process guilt when you experience it.  Quotes · “The more you are able to shift away from actions that breed resentment, the better your relationships will be, the less burned out you'll be and the more space you'll have to be generous in whatever way suits you best. So I want you to avoid choosing resentment when you can, because it will help protect you from burnout long term. But if you're like most people, you choose resentment, because feeling guilty feels like too much to bear.” (2:13-2:40 | Cait) · “If you know that you're going to end up resentful over doing this thing, skip right over it, go straight for the guilt, and process the guilt.” (5:32-5:39 | Cait)  · “My goodness is inherent and I love to give with gusto when my physical, mental and emotional energy allows. I also love to grant myself the permission to refuel when that is the thing that I need.” (11:38-11:55 | Cait)  · “I want you to understand that the fact that something is sacrificial for you doesn't automatically make it morally good.” (13:01-13:12 | Cait) Links  https://caitdonovan.com/resentment-journal https://caitdonovan.as.me/sarah https://caitdonovan.as.me/free References: Mancini, A., Granziol, U., Migliorati, D., Gragnani, A., Femia, G., Cosentino, T., . . . Mancini, F. (2022). Moral orientation guilt scale (MOGS): Development and validation of a novel guilt measurement. Personality and Individual Differences, 189, 1. doi:10.1016/j.paid.2021.111495 XOXO, C If you know that it's time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you've been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait https://friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/quiz Podcast production and show notes provided by HiveCast.fm Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Rebecca Kase is a licensed clinical social worker and expert in EMDR. She experienced her worst burnout when working with a nonprofit organization in community mental health. A combination of toxic authoritarian leadership, unsafe work environment, and clinically challenging patients was the perfect recipe for burnout. Rebecca started to fall into maladaptive coping behaviors and received signals from her body that it was time to change paths. She realized she could not fix the problems with the mental health system that she was part of and instead needed to find ways to help others that would also allow her to also better serve herself. Through a greater understanding of how the nervous system works and how to use EMDR as a biohack for healing from trauma, Rebecca has found a way to help others that still aligns with her own values. Tune into this episode to learn more. “I think of EMDR as kind of like Drano for the brain-o. Like an antacid for your nervous system,” shares Rebecca Kase when explaining how EMDR helps to clear away old, harmful memories, patterns, and feelings from where they have become stuck in the nervous system. EMDR or eye movement desensitization reprocessing is an evidence-based treatment approach that is the standard treatment for PTSD, but also helps with anxiety, chronic pain, depression, and a myriad of other conditions. EMDR uses bilateral stimulation through visual or auditory cues to cause a patient's eyes to move back and forth in a way that is similar to how our eyes move during REM sleep. This helps patients to reprocess traumatic memories in a healthier way so that they can finally move forward and their nervous systems can get unstuck.  Tune into today's episode of FRIED. The Burnout Podcast for a conversation with Rebecca Kase about using EMDR to heal from trauma. Learn more about the three different states of the nervous system, how neuroception works to keep us safe, and how sometimes the best self care is a box cake.  Quotes · “One of my self care items is I make myself just a cheap box cake and I just go to town on it for about a day. So my husband always knows when he sees the self care cake. He's like, ‘Oh, that's where we are. We're calling out the big guns'.” (4:21-4:38 | Rebecca) · “My number one tip is reframe your burnout as a sign that your nervous system is working as it's supposed to and it's not always something to fix, or mend, or self care gratitude journal away.” (6:27-6:39 | Rebecca)  · “It's not meant to be like toxic positivity or spiritual bypassing, because it's not saying, ‘shits not on fire', yes, shits on fire, and the birds are singing while it's burning down. It's about being able to find the balance, the dialectic of life, that I think is really important and helpful when our neuroception is like, ‘danger, danger, danger'.” (13:38-13:58 | Rebecca) · “All of our strategies that we go to when we are out of that window of tolerance are all attempts to cope, whether they're adaptive or not, everything you do throughout the day is an attempt to regulate yourself.” (20:46-20:57 | Rebecca) · “There's a shortage in the mental health community and in the medical profession. I see that as leverage. That is leverage. So therefore, you do not have to settle for some shitty deal that is not good for your wellness, your sanity, your body, your mind, heart, brain or your family.” (27:13-27:31 | Rebecca) Links Connect with Rebecca Kase: https://rebeccakase.com  https://instagram.com/rebeccakase.co  https://emdria.org  https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/therapists?search=emdr  XOXO, C If you know that it's time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you've been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait https://friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/quiz Podcast production and show notes provided by HiveCast.fm Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices