Podcasts about mind journal

In this podcast episode, guest Laura Lawrence shares her powerful journey of finding purpose within pain. Through heartbreak and betrayal, she has experienced profound personal growth and resilience. Laura, an author, speaker, educator, and mental health advocate, opens up about enduring a heartbreaking and life-altering breakup. From the moment she heard the words 'I don't love you anymore,' she navigated a rollercoaster of emotions and started over as a single mother. Despite the overwhelming challenges, she recognized the need for professional support and sought help for herself and her children. Through alternative modalities like Body Talk, she was able to release stored emotions and heal her mind, body, and spirit. Laura's dedication to mental health led her to become a mental health advocate for youth. Her passion for working with young people inspired her to establish the nonprofit organization Youth Matter Canada, empowering thousands of kids to speak up about their mental health. Through her book 'Behind Closed Doors' and upcoming podcast, Laura continues to share her story and empower others to overcome adversity and embrace resilience. Laura's Links: www.lauralawrence.ca/shop (link to purchase book) www.instagram.com/lauralawrence.author (IG account) .................................................................. Rising Strong LINKS: FREE resource: Create More ME Time: bit.ly/metimeresource Get all the podcast updates and notifications of new episodes: bit.ly/risingstrongupdates Support this podcast by purchasing a Calming Journal: bit.ly/calmingjournals Follow us on Instagram: @risingstrongpodcast Facebook page: send your a screenshot of your podcast reviews via the 'comment' button here: @Risingstrongpodcast WIN SWAG: Screenshot your 5-star review for a chance to win some Rising Strong swag! then send it to Lisa@LisaKBoehm.com Remember to follow and subscribe so you never miss an episode .................................................................. TRANSCRIPT: HOST/Lisa: In the journey through heartbreak and betrayal, many find themselves lost in the chaos of emotions. How is it that some people find the purpose within the pain and experience profound personal growth? Today's guest, Laura Lawrence, is going to tell you exactly that. Laura is an author, speaker, educator, and mental health advocate who has shared the stage with powerful female voices like Dr. Jody Carrington and Jess Tatu. Hi, I'm Lisa, and this is Rising strong mental health and resilience. On this podcast, we dive into different kinds of adversity and the resilience required to rise above. Make sure to follow or subscribe so you don't miss a single episode. Now, let's get started. All right. Today I have Laura Lawrence in studio with me. I met Laura about a year and a half ago, and I was in awe of her inner strength and confidence the moment I met her. She has weathered some storms that some of you will relate to, and her resilience is inspiring. Welcome to the show, Laura. Laura: Thank you for having me, and thank you for those kind words, Host/Lisa: all truths. Laura, you have endured a heartbreaking and life altering breakup. Tell us about the events that unfolded when you heard the words, I don't love you anymore. Laura: Wow. Well, gosh, so many events unfolded after those words, and at the time, it was absolutely the hardest thing I had ever had to navigate in my life. There were so many emotions, so many layers to it, and starting over in life at the age of 32 with two children under the age of six was absolutely terrifying. But I'll take you back a little bit and tell you kind of where it all began. So I met my ex husband when we were 16 years old. We were high school sweethearts. We got married when I was 22. And in our 17 year journey together, we walked side by side through so many things. We had two children together. We grieved the loss of a child through a miscarriage together. We grieved the loss of loved ones together. We embarked on new career paths, new journeys. But it was about at the ten year marriage mark that we found ourselves in the depths of conflict that really had started many years prior. Both of us were carrying our own inner child wounds, over, committed to work, chaotic schedules, stresses of life work, raising children, really all the things that two people in a relationship or a marriage face. And we were facing them with two different mindsets, two different belief systems, two different sets of upbringing in our families. But it was after one fateful argument that we had that was the tipping point. It was the proverbial straw that broke the camel's back. I would say he was emotionally depleted, and so was I. But he was done. Like, actually done. So from that night of that argument to today, almost, oh, gosh, twelve years later, there has always been four sides to this multilayered love story and separation story. There's my side, there's his. Of course, there's our children's side and the outside world, who always had their view from what I like to call the cheap seats. Host/Lisa: Wow, that's really interesting. You always hear there's two sides to every story, which I agree with. I'd never thought about those other two dimensions that you mentioned. Yeah, that's really powerful. And did you find that the cheap seats were giving you some difficult times as well, on top of everything else that you were dealing with? Laura: Oh, yes, they certainly were. It was a very public and painful separation divorce. It's interesting. Just a couple of weeks ago, I heard yet another rumor, honestly, a decade later. So, yeah, living in a small community, being in the public eye, as at the time, I was a teacher, an educator in the community. We lived a block from the school. We ran a business together. We were often in the public's eye through community service organizations. So it was definitely a journey. Host/Lisa: How did this all make you feel? Laura: It was gutting. It was heart wrenching. There were so many days and nights where I felt hopeless. It felt like my entire world and the ideals that I and many of us cling on to since we're children, imagining what a marriage would look like and feel like I mean, all of it came crashing down at once. And now when I say that, I say that kind of tongue in cheek because of course, it didn't all come crashing down in a day. It was years in the making. But it felt like a shattered ceiling, a crumbling floor. There's so many ways I could describe it, and I often describe that time as if it felt similar to falling into a deep, dark well and that I could see the light just out of the distance of the top of the well. But it was cold, it was lonely, it was dark. Every time I tried to kind of clamor up the sides of the well, I would fall back down again. And I, to that point, had never experienced depression. It was even hard for me to understand seeing loved ones or friends go through depression because I just had never been there in my own mind and body. But if you've ever been through a breakup or a separation or divorce, you know very well that gut punching feeling of hearing somebody tell you that they're done or they just don't love you anymore, or that's it, there's really no going back from that moment. Host/Lisa: Do you think it was harder for you to navigate the path forward, or do you think it was harder for you to watch your children navigate the path forward? Laura: Wow, that's an interesting question. I would say that both were very difficult in different ways where, I mean, I definitely felt helpless. There were things that were within my control that I could have done leading up to that point and then also in trying to find resolution. But for children who are involved in separation and divorce, they really are helpless. They really are the collateral damage, so to speak. And I wanted to ensure that as much as I could have the power over ensuring that my children didn't feel like collateral damage, it's almost inevitable, just with all of the layers that kind of ensue following a separation and divorce. Host/Lisa: Did you seek professional support for yourself or for yourself and your children? Laura: Yeah, I mean, 100%. I know. I think when you had sent me the show notes, you had asked, how did this affect your mental health? And when I was thinking about it, the very first thing that came to my mind was the easier question would be, like, how didn't it affect my mental health? It affected absolutely every aspect of my wellness. I could not sleep. I could not eat. I could not focus or concentrate at work. I cried for hours and hours daily. I fixated became obsessed with trying to solve it, work it out, make it work. I was anxious. I was depressed. And although I never made a formal plan to take my life and I don't think I've ever publicly spoken about this as a speaker and an author, I'm not even sure this is in my book. Actually, I'm pretty sure it isn't. But I do remember one evening that I was driving home late and the thought had crossed my mind what would happen if I just allowed my car to slip across the solid yellow line? And it was just for a fraction of a minute that that thought was there. But I clearly remember that. And I couldn't show up as my best self for my children or my students. I really was an empty shell. I lost 30 pounds so quickly, many people asked and wondered if I was sick. There were even questions whether I had a terminal illness because I had to hide so much for quite a few months, as we hadn't told our children or our families for a while. And the act of hiding the truth really took its toll, I think, not on me, but on all of us. I mean, on my ex husband as well, and on the children. So absolutely I needed to seek professional help. And this part I write extensively about in my book. It started with an intervention weekend. And that's how it goes for many of us, especially when we're in the depths of that well of depression and we really can't see the light at all, it often takes somebody in our inner circle, our loved ones, who reach down and pull us up or pull us out. And I'm very thankful to two very good friends who are concerned, deeply concerned for me. And so they had planned an intervention weekend. It was that weekend that I was introduced to the psychologist who would become like a grandmother to me later and who would stand beside me in this dance of healing. Over the next decade, I was introduced to two very powerful alternative modalities called Reiki and Body Talk during that weekend, and I sought medical help with my doctor, was prescribed medications to help with my sleep and help with my anxiety. So it was like full force after that intervention weekend and kind of throwing all the tools that I could at trying to rebuild so many things that felt broken. Host/Lisa; Now, I know you fairly well, and I also know you to be a very strong woman. And I think anybody who's been through difficult times ultimately knows that the work comes from us. I absolutely think that a therapist, a counselor, is so important when you're going through difficult times, but ultimately that work has to come from within us. Do you remember a turning point when you kind of pulled up your bootstraps and really thought, okay, what do I have to do now to take myself forward and my kids forward? Or was it very evolutionary for you? Laura: No, I mean, I knew that right from the beginning, of course, as I mentioned that. And anybody listening to this, who's ever been any type of conflict in a relationship or a marriage knows that the tension, the conflict builds. And often two people are very different. They have different belief systems, they different subconscious programming. They solve problems differently, they love differently, they communicate differently. And so finding that dance with a partner and finding what works for you and what works for them, it's a tumultuous dance. And I remember taking so much responsibility for so many things and being really hard on myself about how I made so many mistakes or I could have done this better, or I could have done this different. And when it was time for my healing journey, I just knew there was nobody else that was going to do it except for me. And I hadn't been studying any alternative modalities at that point yet, but I had been doing a lot of reading in Conscious Living and Consciousness, and I had been reading books by authors like Deepak Chopra. It's very interesting. Looking back now, it was almost as if my subconscious was preparing me or my psyche was preparing me for what was to come. And then, of course, the path that it led me down, and exploring more of the complementary alternative methods of healing, I absolutely then learned the power of healing yourself and working on that which you can control and the only thing you control which is yourself. Host/Lisa: So true. So how has Body Talk helped you on your journey? Laura: As I mentioned, it was one of those modalities that I was introduced to in that intervention weekend. I had never heard of it before, which is the story that most people will say when it crosses their path. I didn't know what it was. I had no idea what to expect. And I remember after I had that first session on that intervention weekend, I was not impressed, I was not enthused. I thought, I don't know what that was. Didn't really work for me, but cool, thanks. Turns out it kept coming back into my life. And I think that the things that are meant for us always do. They always keep doorknocking. Right? And it turned out to be life changing. The most powerful transformations in my mind, my body and my spirit were all because of this amazing modality. And I would say so for many of my family members as well who have experienced it, including my own children. Like I said after my first session, I was so skeptical and I would even say that didn't work. But I kept being called back to it. And what I tell people about Body Talk is you don't find it, it finds you. That was really cool that it just kept coming back into my awareness. And what it allowed me to do was explore how deeply I was attached to belief systems that were formed very early, before I even knew, in my subconscious between zero to seven, in my own experiences with my family and how I was parented and all the things that happen in that core formation period between age zero to seven. And I realized how so many of those belief systems that I would attach to were wreaking havoc not just in my mental wellness, but really trickling down into the physical manifestation of pain and illness in my body. Body Talk allowed me to release stored emotion from years of experiences and conflict that I was carrying, whether it be inner conflict or conflict that I had had with people in my past or family members in my past. It really was life changing. I just felt like it was the next thing for me to do. It was the next step. It was really what I needed to explore for my full path of healing. So when I left the teaching profession, I began to study Body Talk and I became a certified practitioner and I took all of my advanced classes and I started a business in a community where there were no Body Talk practitioners. Nobody had ever heard of it. I am so grateful for every client who's trusted me sitting beside them and walking beside them in their healing journey. It has been not only healing for them, but also for myself. Host/Lisa: I know we've had this conversation before, but isn't it interesting how when we can get to that space where we can help other people with their healing, that we also benefit from the healing that comes from that work? Laura: Yeah, it's a two way street. It's very reciprocal in nature and forever. As long as I'm living, I will practice Body Talk in some aspect. So let's talk a little bit about the work that you do as a mental health advocate for our youth. Yeah, that's something that I just have always been really passionate about working with youth. So I'm the oldest grandchild on both sides, and I've always been surrounded by kids and always the oldest one in the group. I've been drawn to working with youth since I was a child. I had a vision of becoming a doctor when I was in my last few years of high school, and I changed lanes at the last minute and became a teacher. So I went into the College of Education at the University of Saskatchewan and finished my degree as a high school science teacher. I spent over 15 years in a rural school setting teaching high school sciences and biology and chemistry. I was a coach. I was a mentor. I worked with kids outside of the classroom for many, many hours. I really loved my job and the kids I got to work with, and I had a front row seat, seeing many youth struggle with their own mental health. And this was again, I've been out of the classroom for ten years. Even ten years ago, we did not talk about mental health the way we do now. And so often, kids struggled in silence. But I always had that innate kind of intuitive gut feeling when a kid didn't look okay or when I noticed something that had changed in their demeanor or their attitude or their motivation or their behavior. After certifying as a Body Talk practitioner, after I'd left the classroom, I began creating Mindfulness in the Classroom workshops and professional development opportunities for schools and students, and found myself being hired back into schools, into classrooms, but from a different lens. And I created Mindfulness for Kids camps and workshops that I hosted in my local area. I just absolutely love engaging in youth that way. And then in 2019, I had this wild and crazy idea one day while taking a road trip with my husband, that I thought it would be just so incredible to host a mental health conference day for kids. I had been to so many conferences in my professional career, and they always motivated me and uplifted me and just gave me that extra spark that I needed. And I thought, how cool would that be to do for kids? And that was the beginning of starting my nonprofit organization, youth Matter Canada. And thanks to the help of many passionate individuals in my volunteer team working with Youth Matter, we have been able to help thousands of kids all across the province of Saskatchewan and beyond reach out and speak up for their mental health. Host/Lisa: So important. I think every year that goes by, we're seeing more and more of a crisis, and what a better place to start than with our youth? I love that. Laura: Yeah, I think it's the only place to start, really, for me. It's all I know to do is to help the youth because they're our future. I guess when I say the only place to start, it doesn't mean that we write the rest of us off who are midlife. But I think that when we're taking a real serious look on how we're going to change our approach, we need to start looking at how we spend time with engaging youth in conversations about mental wellness. Host/Lisa: What an incredible gift to give kids all these tools and coping skills that they can use all through life. Laura: Yeah. And it's been incredible working with thousands of kids and talking to them about mental health and having just heart to heart conversations, teaching them some different strategies for self regulation and self awareness. They're not as attached to rigid belief systems, so they are willing to think about things and look at things from a different perspective than adults. And I just think that's just the coolest mindset when you're approaching something like mental wellness. When we travel around the province with our Be Kind to Your Mind team, going into different schools, we have the absolute best conversations with these kids. When we ask them, what does mental health look like? When we talk about the stigmas, when we talk about how just because somebody looks a certain way, we can't assume that they're not struggling, we have this really cool practice we do with them called the imaginary backpack practice. Where we talk about. Every one of us is born with this invisible backpack. And it all starts fairly empty from the time we're born. But then everything that happens to us, every experience that we have with our families, with the outside world, loads into the backpack. So emotions and conflict and trauma and that backpack gets so heavy if we don't learn ways to unpack it, if we don't get a team of people who love us to help us unpack it. And we actually do this visually with the kids by getting them to put a really heavy backpack on their back and then a really light backpack. And it's just incredible, the conversations that come from that so powerful. Host/Lisa: So it just seems like a natural progression, really, that you've gone from the kind of work that you're explaining to us with youth matter and have rolled that really into your speaking career and on stage. I know you talk about lots of things, including Adversity, struggles, challenges, mental health, all kinds of things. Why do you think it's important that you talk about mental health? Laura: Well, mental health is the root of everything. It's the root of absolutely everything. We cannot have any conversation about anything affecting our lives without having a conversation about the state of our mental health. It is the foundation and root of our families, our communities, our work. For me, there's no division. Yeah, like, it's all mental health related. It's just immersed in our everyday life, in the way we talk, the conversations we have. It's so cool. The other day my five year old said to me he could really sense that I was having a bad morning. He could sense that my emotions were starting to become very overwhelming for me. And he looked at me and he said, mom, you should just try that rainbow breathing that you teach us. And when I was subbing for him today in their class, their kindergarten class, I could see him from the corner of my eye engaging in a little bit of meditative breath work because he was feeling very overwhelmed. And I mean, that's the power of immersing all of our conversations, our life, our relationships with mental health. Host/Lisa: I couldn't agree more. I think that is where we need to begin with everything. So when you and I met, you were just getting ready to start editing and publishing your book, Behind Closed Doors. Why did you write this book? Laura: It's another loaded question. Well, sharing stories changes and saves lives. And I think that when I have felt, seen, heard, valued and loved, it felt so much easier for me to get through the hard things. And when we're reminded that we're not alone, that we don't need to struggle in silence, that we're not a failure, but rather just human, it gives us the courage to keep going. And I had never imagined years ago that I'd spiral into the deep depression that I did. I had never imagined that I would be navigating a Divorce, a Separation, Coparenting, which is a whole other podcast in and of itself. But I thought if I could help others with tools and mind shifts and practices to help decrease the impact of stress on their minds and bodies, I would continue to do that for the rest of my days. And for me, writing was always such a big part of my own ability to release stored emotion, to cathartically move through hard things that I had been experiencing. And five years ago I founded a mental health movement called Strong as a Mother. And it was a coffee and conversation series that brought women together in the spirit of connection and real conversation. And why I founded it was because I was a mother who was struggling with so many things silently, because that was the strong thing to do. And I knew that I wasn't alone, I couldn't be alone. And that other women have had to have experienced similar things that I had been experiencing behind closed doors and not talking about them. And so I wanted to create a platform, a community, a movement that brought women together to talk about these things. And it morphed into this really beautiful community of courageous and resilient and everyday normal women who shared their vulnerability, their stories, their laughter, their tears with one another at every event that I hosted. And from that journey I just knew that I wanted every woman out there to experience the magic of the stronger as a mother community that we had created, even though they couldn't get to it in person or I'd never experienced it. So I chose 13 women from that movement that had sat heart to heart with me and with other women and bravely shared their stories of navigating some of the lowest of lows and highest of highs from their journeys of marriage and motherhood and mental health. And I wrote a book about it and I wove pieces of my own story in between those little mini memoirs that ended up being a collection of true heart work that I'm really proud of. And I'm so grateful to those women who sat heart to heart with me because it has created an incredible ripple effect of love and support and the messages and emails I get from readers whom I've never met who just said the book changed their life. Just to be able to read a story and see a version of themselves in that story is just so powerful for their own healing and they're really a gentle way that we can learn from one another and to really help understand different things. Host/Lisa: And that's exactly what your book does. You could pick it up. You don't even have to start at the beginning. You can read each memoir on its own. And there is definitely something in your book for everybody. Well done. Laura: Thank you. What's next for you? I feel like every time I talk to you, you've got something new coming up on the horizon. Tell us what's going on. Laura: Well, there's always something next. My busy brain is both a blessing and a curse. And I have quite a creative mind, so I'm always thinking about the next thing. So I have already written three children's books, all under the niche of mental wellness. They are published and available on my website and through Amazon. But I have two more children's books that have been edited and are ready to release, so those will be coming out in 2024. And I have had this dream to actually host my own podcast since 2018. In fact, the graphic designer who did my website back in 2018, I had her put in the corner on the bottom coming soon podcast. But turns out Coming soon was five years. So that'll be coming in early 2024 as well. Well, I'm so excited to hear the first episode when it comes out in the new year. Congratulations on that. Thank you. And I think that what it stems from, and I write about this in the book, is that there are two things that every soul on this planet will experience in life, and those two things are love and pain. And the degree to which we love someone or something is very synonymous to the degree of which we experience pain when that someone or something leaves us or dies or becomes ill. And I think that creating a platform or a movement where you can allow people to feel vulnerable enough to share that love, to share that pain is so cathartic and so healing. I am really excited, but a podcast is not for the faint of heart. So I want to congratulate you as well. Your episodes have been phenomenal. I absolutely love tuning in and I think that many people don't know what goes behind all of the work in creating these platforms. It's hard work. Host/Lisa: It's hard work for sure. Definitely hard work and heart work, as you say. Just for our listeners, I will be listing Laura's books and where you can find them and also the links to connect with Laura if you have any questions for her. But Laura, I would love to know. Now this is a surprise question. She doesn't know that. I'm going to ask this. What does resilience mean to you? Laura: Resilience means picking yourself back up again after you've fallen in that deep, dark well and reaching out to those who love you, who support you to get back up again. I really, truly believe that we can't experience resilience or have resilience on our own. It's not a one woman or one man show. It really comes from our support systems, from those we love, from those that encourage us to get back up again. And for me, resilience meant restarting. The paths that we take are very different from what we thought life would look like. And so resilience is just navigating those paths again in new ways. host/Lisa: Yeah, I agree. And I'm also going to add to that, and this is just my spin on things, but I also think we can't have resilience without having had Adversity first. Laura: Oh, for sure. I just don't think we can truly understand what resilience is until we have fallen flat on our face, unfortunately. Host/Lisa: So how do you think you've become resilient? Sometimes I think I have had to fake it until I actually made it. To be honest. I think that my resilience has really come from my ability to be open minded, but also to build community. I say without doubt, the divorce, the separation led me to today, which I am incredibly grateful for. I have had the most beautiful opportunities to develop rich, abundant and grateful moments and relationships with people that would have never come my way had that frying pan moment not happened in my life. Host/Lisa: Right. It's so true. And I think that when we fall flat on our face and we have to get back up and usually it's not just one time getting up and it's all good, right? We're falling down, getting up, falling down, getting up a whole bunch of times. Every time we get back up, we gain a little bit of confidence. Oh yeah, I was down here before. I remember this place. Okay. And I've got this tool. Belt and it's getting more tools in it. I know how to get up, and I think that that's very powerful as well on our journey, because life is not easy, but we have to just keep going. Laura: We are always one moment away from a different trajectory in life. And so having those tools, having that team, having that community so that they can help pick you up when you go through those lowest of lows is imperative. And I think that we can't get comfortable in thinking that we've arrived at a certain healing space, because healing is just not a linear journey. It is messy, you know, my friend, it is messy. Host/Lisa: It is very messy. Laura, you're a very wise woman, and I am so grateful that you took some time out to spend time with me today. And I know that your message is going to resonate with many of our listeners. So thank you so much for coming today. And to our listeners, be well and stay resilient. Laura: Thanks, Lisa. Host/Lisa

This episode features the incredible story of Chris Beaudry, who shares his transformative journey from trauma to healing. Growing up with an addict mother, Chris experienced uncertainty, abuse, and the constant fear of abandonment. As he navigated life, he turned to anger and addiction as coping mechanisms. However, with a deep commitment to his own well-being, Chris embarked on a path of self-discovery and healing. Through therapy, spirituality, and embodiment practices, and yoga, he found his way to forward after witnessing the aftermath of the crash site of the Humboldt Broncos bus crash in 2018. Today, Chris is a public speaker who uses his experiences to inspire and connect with others, emphasizing the importance of embracing our pain as a catalyst for growth. ............................................................... Learn more about Chris: website: www.crbwellness.ca instagram: @chrisbeaudry9 ................................................................ LINKS realted to the Rising Strong: Mental health podcast: FREE Resource: Create More ME TIME: bit.ly/metimeresource Support this podcast by purchasing a Calming Journal: bit.ly/calmingjournals Follow us on Instagram: www.instagram.com/risingstrongpodcast Facebook page - send your reviews and comments via the 'comment' button here: www.facebook.com/risingstrongpodcast WIN SWAG! Email a screenshot of your 5-star review for a chance to win some Rising Strong swag! Lisa@LisaKBoehm.com ***Remember to follow and subscribe so you never miss an episode*** ................................................................... TRANSCRIPT: Host/Lisa: On April 6, 2018, a bus carrying the Humboldt Broncos hockey team was struck by a semi, killing 16 people. In this episode, Chris Beaudry, who was driving behind the bus, joins me in a conversation about his experience and his healing. Chris is now a speaker who shares stories from his life to help others. My name is Lisa. This is rising strong mental health and resilience. This podcast came about because I believe in the healing power of stories. They teach us and they connect us. Please be warned that some details might be disturbing to some listeners. Today I have Chris Beaudry with me who is sharing his experiences with pain and his journey forward. Welcome to the show, Chris. Thank you. Glad to be here. So you have been through a lot, starting with your childhood. Tell us about your life at home when you were growing up. When I was a kid, I really thought that I had a great childhood. And part of the reason too that I thought that was my parents told me how good it was. And that being said, there were aspects that were really good. But growing up with a mum who is an addict had a lot of difficulties. There was always that background uncertainty of like, is mom going to be there when I get home? How many more days until we get beat again? What's going to be the thing that sets her off this time? And when my dad, who worked away, even when he was home, it's like, okay, how many more days till we have the sleepless night where we just hear them screaming till 11:00 or we hear mum screaming and dad just sitting at the table quietly, wow, that must have been really hard. We all grow up in these little silos and as kids, we think that what we're experiencing is normal. When did you get to a point where you thought most kids aren't experiencing this kind of thing? My thirty s. Oh, really? Well, yeah, I assumed everyone was spanked. I thought everyone would hide it, be like, oh, I got a little slap on the hand and I thought they were just sugar coating things, being like, oh, no, you were taken out to the barn and had Your *** totally kicked, weren't you? Or your mom broke wooden spoons over your ***. And when I realized that that wasn't normal and that's not how everyone is raised, I started to question all of the scenarios in life. It's like, oh, your sister didn't get left at school, your mom didn't run away. When you guys are in the bathtub, those things don't happen to everyone. So that must have scarred you a little bit. Yeah, the whole abandonment thing has been probably one of the main themes that I've worked with in my life, through addictions, through healing. It still has funny ways of showing up. It's like part of the way that I tried to heal that as a kid was to try to be special, try to be better than everyone else. And if I was really good or really special, maybe mom wouldn't run away, maybe dad would stay home from work, he wouldn't go to Africa for work. And I was just at my mentors last week and we were talking about just the mind and how it works and I kind of chuckled. And I'm like, my mind really sneakily still wants me to be special and I've still got to stay on top of that every day. It's interesting how our coping mechanisms, they're always at work and I think our traumas, our grief, our tragedies, they stick with us. In the beginning of my book, I talk about carrying the suitcase. In my situation, it's grief, but I think we all have this bag of junk that we carry around with us. And some days it's heavier than others. I think it's always there. And sometimes it creeps to the surface a little bit more. In your teens and your 20s, you're trying to silence these feelings and also battling unworthiness, which I'm finding really interesting here in this conversation because you're just telling me how you're trying to be so special and yet you felt so unworthy. Why did you feel this way and how did you handle those feelings? Well, I think they go hand in hand. And these patterns I find adapt and change throughout early childhood. And I was trying to be special to make Mum stay. I was trying to be special to make dad stay. And when I couldn't be special enough, I couldn't do enough because dad would still go to work and mom would still have those meltdowns and hit us or lock herself in her room for the whole evening. It's like, well, it can't be them because they're the adults. And now, granted, this is five, six, seven year old me talking right now. It couldn't be the adults because that's where safety comes from, that's where food comes from, that's where structure comes from. So it has to be me. And if I can't be special enough, then I must be a loser, I must be no good. And I was really young, really young the first time I contemplated suicide, because I was like, I must be worthless, I must be no good. If Mum does this to me, if dad leaves for three, four weeks at a time and is only home for two to three days. He's leaving because I'm no good. And it sounds horrible, but there's also a beautiful aspect to that, is that I created that my parents didn't. Those horrible things that happened to me weren't my choosing, but that belief was. And because I chose that belief, that means that I'm the one that gets to free myself from it. Today, it's not up to my mom or dad. It's up to me. That is powerful, Chris, very powerful. So then you're battling between making yourself feel special and feeling unworthy. Your mental health sounds like it's not doing well if you've contemplated suicide at this point. How did this lead into drinking? Well, early on now, before I touched a drink, I used to say this all the time, four or five years ago when I was public speaking, that I knew I was an addict before I was an addict. And that's changed a bit. Nowadays I think that everyone's addicted, and we're all addicted to the mind and just our thinking processes, that how we use the mind to escape, or we use the mind to grasp or create and keeps us from feeling what's happening right now. And for me, at seven or eight years old, I was an addict to anger, because I knew inside what was happening internally was horrible. YoU felt so gross and afraid. But when I would play video games and lose and freak out, throw the remote, kick the Super Nintendo in the basement in Calgary, what happens when you have those big meltdowns? Our brain does something, releases some endorphins. You get that moment. And it was at eight years old. I was like, wow. When I freak out, I get this moment of peace, this moment of clarity. How can I push this? How can I push the limits with this, where it's okay to do this so I can get those moments? And I found I could do that in sports, I could do that in ball. If we lost a game, I was allowed to throw a little tantrum. I wasn't too actually that upset about it, but it would give me that release, that quick hit. And of course, at times you'd get in trouble for it. You get in a fight at school, but it didn't matter. It didn't matter because I got that 20 minutes of release. And that followed me into when we moved to Saskatchewan. And the first time I got drunk, I was running down the railroad tracks, Naicam, Saskatchewan with a friend, and I looked at him and I said, we've got to do this more often. And I don't think he understood why I said that. For me, I particularly didn't like the feeling of being drunk. But I knew after that first two drinks, I was like this story that I'm not safe, that I'm going to be abandoned, that I'm no good. That story is gone. Wow. And you know what? At a young age, alcohol worked for me. It did until it didn't. And that's what I didn't know, is that it wasn't going to continue to work. So that's when I mixed in alcohol and anger started to fight, and they worked until they didn't. And then it was drugs, which worked. But every time that window where they work got shorter and shorter and shorter. So then it was alcohol and drugs, then alcohol, drugs, and anger, and then it was just chaos. Then I was living back where I was at five, six and seven. Again, I'm curious, was anger the common thread through all of this? Yeah. And even in sobriety, it was probably the hardest one to brEak, because if I had to explore the anger, I would have to look what was beneath that, which was sadness. And what are good little boys not supposed to feel. They're allowed to be angry. Can't be sad, though. But would you say that the expression of your angry feelings maybe was learned from your early childhood? Yeah. I love talking about anger because I think when anger functions, like, in its purest form, it's clarity. It shows us what we're okay with and what we're not okay with. It's subtle and clear. It doesn't hurt me, it doesn't hurt you. But we're not really taught that. We're taught a type of anger that doesn't function well. It hurts me. It hurts you, it's muddied, it's big, it's not subtle. It's clouded. And that's what I was taught. And when you're told that that's okay, men, boys, they're allowed to feel angry. They're allowed to feel this. Well, then you're able to form whatever kind of belief around it you want. And for me, that was, there's nothing wrong with this. There's nothing wrong with fighting people. There's nothing wrong with going to the rider game and punching someone on the way out, that those things are normal behavior when that's absolutely abnormal. And I've seen that at home. I've seen, like, when Mum throws a chair at you for spilling milk, or when you turn the AC on in the car in the winter, when you get home, you get beat with a wooden spoon. You start to think that type of stuff is normal. Wow. I think that anger can actually be used in a healthy way. For example, when we lost our daughter in a car accident, I used my anger to push the city to erect lights around the dark part of the road where she died. Now, when I say anger, it was not yelling and screaming anger. It was the anger that I felt inside for her death. So I think that we can use anger for good, but we have to be a little bit more in tune with our emotions in order to do that. Do you agree? 100%. I think that you need to be skillful with all your emotions. I like the word functioning. I used to call it healthy and unhealthy, but again, I find that you could be on a slippery slope where people can self shame. Oh, my God. I'm using unhealthy anger. Anger to me again, I understand it when I work with it now. It is one of my greatest tools for showing me how to set boundaries. This is what I'm okay with. This is what I'm not okay with. And now I don't express those boundaries in a way I used to. I mean, in the past, it'd be like, you better listen to me. Instead, it's a grounded place in me that's quiet and calm. That's just very short and simple. I'm not okay with what's happening here. This is what I'm okay with, and I think it's a great tool for conversation. Absolutely. When did you realize you needed help, whether it was with your addiction or with your anger? And how did you go about getting that help? I think I was still in high school. I knew I was on a slippery slope then, and it wasn't long after I got out of high school. I tried quitting drinking once at 20 or 21. I started to go and see different individuals to help me with my anger. The way I was thinking, my mom, at that point, kind of right around when I graduated, was going through a bit of a healing process herself, and she would talk about all these different concepts and ideas and the different healers she would go and see. She went more of a deeper spiritual route. And me being a male, 19, in the early 2000s, was like, mom, get the heck out of here with that hippie garbage. But again, it's what planted the seeds early on, and it stayed there. And when I decided to finally quit drinking just about ten years ago after a month in AA, it was like a rocket was lit underneath me. All of that stuff came back that Mum had told me for five, six, seven years. It was like that whole concept about, oh, I'm the one responsible for my thoughts, oh, I'm the one responsible for my feelings. All that stuff just came back instantly. It was like, oh, so it really doesn't matter who I work with. In the end, I'm going to still have to look at myself. So true. So would you say that you have done more work on your own or are you still seeking assistance from professionals? I don't want to confuse anyone here because I do think there's a valuable, extremely valuable aspect of healing that's found in relationship. Gabor says this all the time. Our trauma happened in relationship and we'll find healing in relationship. And I think that we can, through relationship, find areas that make us feel safe, make us feel comfortable, make us feel accepted. And early on, while some of those traumas, while some of those wounds are so fresh that we can't see past them, that I would say a level of a relationship be that with the therapist, a mentor, a meditation teacher, a shaman, whatever route you want to go, that that's extremely valuable and important until you have the capacity to start to sit with your own stuff, which I find is kind of where I'm at now, where I still see my homeopath and I still see my mentor probably once a month. But 90% of what I'm bringing to them now is more theorizing. It's a back and forth conversation where most of my self work is probably done in the sauna in the morning while everyone's asleep, I'll go in there and I'll sit with the difficult sensations that are happening in my body and be like, okay, let's get into this. Let's see what's happening here. So a real evolution has taken place is what I'm hearing.

In this episode, mental health advocate Ty Strawford shares valuable insights on how to support loved ones who may be suffering from mental health issues and offers advice on what to say when someone is struggling. Ty's own journey began after surviving a suicide attempt, which led him to a profound moment of clarity and a desire to help others. Through his organization, Invisible Mental Health and the the We See You event, Ty has become an inspiration for mental health awareness and resilience. He emphasizes the power of community in breaking the stigma surrounding mental health, particularly for men, who often face societal pressure to suppress their emotions. Ty believes that open conversations and support networks are crucial for fostering understanding and acceptance. He also highlights the need for improved mental health resources in workplaces and schools. Ty's story serves as a testament to the transformative impact of speaking up and uniting in the face of mental health challenges. Learn more about Ty or follow him on social media: Invisible Instagram - https://instagram.com/invisible.mental.health?igshid=OGQ5ZDc2ODk2ZA%3D%3D&utm_source=qr CBC Invisible Interview - https://youtu.be/sH-HdFhucn8?si=GPKRrI0FFo4UG49F .............................................. Rising Strong Links: Support this podcast by purchasing a Calming Journal: bit.ly/calmingjournals Follow us on Instagram: www.instagram.com/risingstrongpodcast Facebook page - send your reviews and comments via the 'comment' button here: www.facebook.com/risingstrongpodcast Email a screenshot of your 5-star review for a chance to win some Rising Strong swag! Lisa@LisaKBoehm.com Remember to follow and subscribe so you never miss an episode .............................................. TRANSCRIPT: Host/Lisa: Perhaps you've wondered how you can support your loved ones who may be suffering with mental health, or what to say when someone is struggling. In this episode, we will be hearing from Ty Strawford, who will answer these questions and more. Ty is a mental health advocate who has turned to helping those who struggle with mental health after he survived an attempt on his own life. My name is Lisa and this is rising strong mental health and resilience. I've been a health coach since 2012 and have faced my own mental health struggles. My goal is simple, help you be well and stay resilient. Make sure to follow and subscribe so you don't miss a single episode. Welcome to Rising Strong, Ty. Ty: Hey, thanks for having me. Host/Lisa: So, just for our listeners, about two months ago, I met you at an event that you hosted, and I was blown away for a number of reasons. One, you're 21 years old, Ty. I know plenty of 30, 40 and 50 year olds who couldn't put something like this together. And two, over half of your speakers and performers were male, and a good portion of your audience that night was men. What you are doing for mental health is nothing short of incredible. And I know I said this just a few seconds before, but you're 21 years old and you're the owner of Invisible Mental Health and co creator of the we see you event. That is quite an accomplishment for anyone. Can you tell us more about how all of this came to be? Ty: I have dealt with mental health issues for a really big chunk of my life. About a year ago in September, I made an attempt on my life, and I was in the hospital, and I had a moment of clarity. I was thinking, like, okay, my life almost just ended. I could have lost everything, right? And I was just kind of thinking, like, I kind of want my life to mean something. And I just kind of was thinking, like, I didn't want anyone to have to feel how I had been feeling. So that was pretty much the start of everything. Host/Lisa: when you say moment of clarity, I'm really curious about that. Did you know right then and there that you wanted to help other people? Ty: Yes. That was the first thing that I kind of started thinking about after just the whole big realization of just what I could have lost. Host/Lisa: That's incredible. So, before I asked you to come on the podcast, I did my own research, and I listened to your awesome interview on CBC and some other blogs that you had written and such, and it really became clear to me that you focus on the power of community. Can you tell us more about that and why you believe it's so important? Ty: I think it's really important, and I feel like it's really powerful for people to see, like, a community of people who are open to sharing what they're going through, are wanting to talk about it, especially for men. Like you were saying before, I was really happy to have a lot of men out there because that's like the big chunk of the population who are just in that stigma of, oh, just like, man up, don't talk about it. You don't need to talk about it. Deal with it on your own. So I think it's good to see, have people see all these people come together that are willing to talk about it. Host/Lisa: I agree. I think we've gotten to a point where we see more women stepping forward, sharing their stories, being vulnerable and so on. But it seems to be a lot harder for men. Why do you think mental health is so unseen and so invisible when you. Ty: Compare it to physical illnesses. Say, like, you broke your arm, like you're walking down the street, you walk into work, everyone sees that you have a broken arm, and they're all willing to help because they can see right away that you're struggling with your arm. Right. But you can't see mental health issues, and people are really good at masking those kinds of things. Like myself, I used to mask all of my mental health issues for the most part, or at least masking most of it. Host/Lisa: You had an excellent point, though, and I realize that it's a silly question because we can't see mental health. I mean, I have been carrying my own mental health secrets for 23 years, and I think we become experts at sayinG, I'm fine, I'm okay, just having a bad day and not really being honest because we can't see it like a broken arm. So I think that's an excellent answer. I'm really curious, though, I think. How did you mask your mental health struggles? Ty: I would just put on a happy face, put on lots of the time I'd be at home, I'd be in my room. I'd just be really obsessed. I could just be crying in my room. And then it's like, okay, supper time. All right, wipe the tears away, put on a happy face, have family supper, and, yeah, like you were saying before, just a whole lot of saying, yeah, I'm good, I'm good, I'm good. Host/Lisa: Did you ever feel that there was a time when your mom, your dad, your brother, your sister, somebody asked you, hey, are you really okay that you really felt like maybe you could tell somebody. Ty: I've never really been too comfortable talking about that stuff with my family in person. I mean, I've definitely had that happen with closer friends and maybe over text just because it's a lot easier, but, yeah, not normally with family. Host/Lisa: And why do you think that is? Ty: I don't want to be getting nagged about it, be thinking about it more, bothering people. Host/Lisa: Were you ever worried about being a burden to your family? Even though I think realistically that would never be an issue, but I think when we're in the middle of struggling with our mental health, we don't always think clearly. Were you ever afraid of being a burden on your family? Ty: 100%. That was a big chunk of the reason why I didn't want to talk about it a lot, because there's always been situations where I've needed something done differently because of my mental state. And I'll just think about it and be like, oh, they're probably going to get bummed out a little bit from what I have to say and what I need. Host/Lisa: Do you think that our society, there's a lot of pressure on being happy and all of that kind of stuff? Ty: 100%, especially through social media, like Instagram specifically, just because of what social media is? It's really just like a highlight reel. We had one of Our first speakers talk about this at our very first event. Like what you see on Instagram, it's like, oh, they're just taking the absolute best pictures, the best moments of their life, and they're putting that on display for everyone to see. And everything you're seeing is just like, happy, happy. Everyone's happy, happy, happy. Their new car, their vacation. And so it's really easy to fall into that pit of, oh, why am I not happy? I need to be happy. All these other people are happy. No one else is sad. Like I'm sad right now. But in reality, it's obviously a lot more people are sad than happy or dealing with mental health issues that don't show it on social media. Host/Lisa: Absolutely. And that brings up, actually, another question that I want to ask you, because you do speak about this very topic, and that's about the pros and the cons of social media and mental health. Ty: Well, I think it's kind of like in life, there's always a positive and a negative of everything. And I think it's just more like a matter of being able to focus on the positives of social media. And yes, there are the negatives of the comparisons, as I think that's the biggest issue. But there's also so many positives, like, you're able to connect with everybody. You're able to connect with anybody. All over the world, I talk to so many friends that I've made just online, other places of the world, I talk to them. If I need someone to talk to things like that, it's really all just about how you look at things. Host/Lisa: With that, for sure, do you find yourself distancing yourself from certain situations or certain accounts on social media because they're really not serving you well, or are you searching out certain things and filling up your feed that way? Ty: I would say, like, in the past, I have removed things from what I would see in my feed, like TikTok specifically. I remember not too sure when, but there was a certain time where I would see a bunch of negative things on TikTok. And there's, like, an option where you can basically say you're not interested in this type of video. And I would normally do that a lot so that eventually the things I were seeing were a lot more positive, and all the negative things I was seeing were not showing up as much or at all. Host/Lisa: That's a really smart thing. And I think that on most social media platforms, there is some kind of option to do that in some way, shape, or form. Even the people in our lives, and we love them, and they're our friends or our family or what have you. But some people we can mute, we can kind of create our social media so that it suits our needs. And sometimes I think we just need to be cognizant of that and to follow the things and the people that are going to fill our bucket rather than deplete it. Ty: Like a big thing is, I was just thinking about this. You are the creator of your environment. Things around you are your environment, but you are able to perceive those things, and you are able to choose your environment so much. Host/Lisa: Well, really choose wisely. Right? Like, whether it's people, whether it's social media, we know perceive them the way we want to see them, or we can just choose what we surround ourselves with. I can't remember who said this. I always say it's Oprah, and I might even have that wrong. But somebody, some big influencer, said that we are the average of the five people we spend the most time with. So if we want to be happier or if we want to be around people that are helping us on our mental health journey, then we've got to choose those people wisely, too. And that kind of rolls into all aspects of our life. Ty: Yeah, 100%. Host/Lisa: Your mom has been a big part of your journey. What can you tell parents who might be listening how they can best check in with their kids? Ty: I would say probably the most important thing is asking what they need and not just assuming. For at least me personally, I've found that I'm a lot more comfortable having that communicated through. Just like texting and some other things you might need. Could be space. Like, you might need space. You might need to not talk about it. It really just depends on the person. And I think it's important to just ask and just get a better understanding of what they need personally, because it's not the same for everybody. Host/Lisa: That's an excellent point. And the other thing I think is that it's really easy when somebody asks you, how are you doing to put that mask on and say, I'm fine. But a question like, what do you need? You can't just say, I'm fine. You've got to think about something and you've got to answer back. And I feel like any answer to that question is going to be closer to the reality of what you're feeling. I think as parents, my hands in the air right now. I think sometimes we do assume we know what our kids need, or we try to direct them in the direction that we would need to take if we were in their shoes. And oftentimes as parents, we don't know. Right? We don't know. So I think that that is a really excellent thing to ask. What do you need? If you suspect that your child or your friend or your neighbor or your coworker is really struggling, what are some other questions that we can ask to help them even beyond what do you need? Ty: I'd say, like, just asking to spend time together. I think it's just a very simple thing that you can do. Just like, being around the people that you care about is really healing in a lot of ways. And for me personally, that's what helps me a lot of the time is just going downstairs, watching a show with my dad, watching a show with the family, sitting upstairs, talking with the family, going hang out with a friend, just things like that. Really helpful. Host/Lisa: So not even necessarily talking about what's going on inside, but just feeling connected. Is that correct? Ty: Yeah. And it also serves as a nice little distraction from, say, what you're thinking about. You're able to change your environment, you're less in your head and you're more in the moment with these people you're with. Yeah. Generally, just like anything where you're changing your environment, whatever that is, just to get out of your head, really, just putting yourself in any different type of situation. Sometimes I'll just go for a drive, just go hang out with a friend. I'll go for a walk, bike ride, or if it's nighttime and I can't leave, it's like, oh, I'll play a game on my phone, I'll call a friend, I'll work on this design, something like that. Just anything where your mind is getting busy. Host/Lisa: So it sounds like you've done a lot of work and you've really done a lot of self discovery to figure out what works for you. And mindfulness, being in the moment, I really, really like that. And being aware of how you're feeling at the same time. And, oh, I'm feeling this way. I really need to get out of my head. I'm going to go find something to do. I'm going to connect with somebody. So for those who may be at their lowest point, what advice can you give them? Ty: I would say just the biggest thing is make sure that you're not suffering in silence. Communicate what you need in however way you can. If you're just putting on a mask, people aren't going to be able to help you and you're not going to be able to get support and get the help you need. I'm sure you can do a lot of self care, but lots of times when you're in that very low state, those are the people that you need to push you in the right directions to get out of that state. Host/Lisa: If you could go back in time to about a year ago, your lowest point, what would you say to yourself? Ty: Let your feelings out. Talk about it, don't hide it. Yeah, that was what led to everything. It's just not talking about it, not being open. Host/Lisa: And my guess is feeling very alone at the same time, eh? Ty: Yeah, very alone. Nobody on the planet knew what I was going through. Even my closest friends, my closest friends knew that I was struggling, but none of them knew. My family didn't know, nobody did. Host/Lisa: Now that you have started being a little bit more open about it and creating these events, I bet you have lots of people that you know that have said, hey, I'm struggling too. Ty: Yeah, I talk to lots of people all the time that just need somebody to talk to, whether that's friends or random people online, to be honest, every once in a while. But I don't know. I'm always more than happy to help anybody that needs someone to talk to. Host Lisa: What would you like to see changed about mental health? Clearly, we have lots of work to do in our society, but where would you like to see that begin? Ty: More talking about it, just the more the better. For understanding sake, specifically. Yeah. Especially for the workforce, because I feel like a lot of people's mental health are really damaged by the fact that they can't take time off work or they don't think it's okay to do to take time off work for their mental health, even though I know there are laws in place where you are able to take time off work. But I just feel like that's frowned upon a lot, too. Host/Lisa: I agree. I think that we have a long ways to go in that area, and I think this circles right back to that very first thing that we talked about, that it's invisible, right? If somebody has crutches and they come into work and they've broken their leg and, oh, my gosh, let me get a chair. Let me get a stool for you. What do you need? How can we make your work day easier for you? But you don't see that even if people are open about their mental health, and frankly, there's still a very large stigma around that as well. So I absolutely agree that we need to make some big steps forward in that area. So tell us how your work with invisible mental health and the WECU event, how is that helping you? Ty: It's helped me find purpose, and that purpose is helping people. So it's really a good feeling to know that what I'm doing has a meaning beyond myself and it is having a positive impact. Host/Lisa: I think it's well documented that when we're hurting, helping is so cathartic. So Cathartic. And I don't think that there are many other words to really sum that up, but clearly doing this work is helping you. Ty: Yeah. Host/Lisa: So we've talked a little bit about this, but talking about mental health is so important beyond the work that you do, beyond things like my podcast. How do you think that we can create more conversation around mental health? Do you think we could even start in the schools? Ty: I think in schools would be really good. I know there's a bit of that now, but I feel like that's really important, too, to have that be in schools more, because that's what's going to stick with people growing up like a newer generation of kids that are going to school and learning more about mental health and how to deal with it. That's setting up society to be way more open to talking about it and just everything in general with mental health. Host/Lisa: Now, I know just from friends and so on that are teachers, that there are some programs, there are some speakers, there are things going on in the schools. Do you have any suggestions for other things that we could do? Ty: I think it would be good to let kids know. In schools especially, it's okay to not be feeling okay in the sense that if they need to leave and if they need to go to a safe space or get out of the room, that's okay. Because I was talking at a girl's mental health group about, I think, two weeks ago now, and that was something they were actually asking me, is they were struggling because they at times needed to leave the room, but they didn't think that that was going to be okay. And they didn't want to get in trouble for asking even to leave the room because of their mental health. It's important to let them know that they can leave if they need to. And it's okay to talk about those issues with your teacher if it's something that's impacting you. Host/Lisa: I think that there's lots of areas for growth, and creating a safe place would be a really good idea as well. Ty: Yeah, 100% like what you were saying. I agree with the mentorship thing for sure. I was actually trying more just like brainstorming something along those lines just for everybody in general, just to have. The general idea was just having people sign up that are willing to just talk with people. They don't have to be professionals. It doesn't have to be anything super serious like that, but just people that are willing to talk with people that need it. And those people can sign up and be those people that are available for people to just talk to if they need someone too. Host/Lisa: Like a peer support group, really? Ty: Yeah, something like that. Host/Lisa: Yeah, that would be really great to see that started in the schools. So the other half of this podcast is resilience. And when I created this podcast, not only did I want to interview inspiring people like you, but also I always want to end these interviews in a way that will really inspire our listeners. So I'd really like to know what resilience means to you and how you think you've become more resilient. Ty: I think a big part of that is just thinking really big picture, because with myself specifically, I've found that people like, when you're struggling with anxiety and depression, it's really easy to fall into the pit of thinking, oh, I'm going to feel like this forever. This thing that sucks. Right now is going to be sucking forever. I'm going to be feeling like this forever. And now whenever situations come up where there's a lot of negative emotions, hard times, I just always remind myself that there are better days ahead. Life is so long. It's short, but it is very long. There are so many years ahead. And I guarantee this little thing that's really bringing me down right now isn't going to be bringing me down nearly as much or even at all in say even just like a year or a few months or even a month. It really helps me to just be aware of that. Host/Lisa: Do you think it helps you to reflect back on the last year or so and say, man, I made it through that, I did that and I figured it out? Do you think that going through it and coming out the other side, so to speak, gives you a sense of strength and maybe some confidence as well? Ty: Yeah, 100%. Host/Lisa: I feel like every time you get through a really bad patch, you kind of learn how to get through the next really bad patch, if that makes sense, because you think, okay, I've done this before. I remember the Last time I was here. These are the tools I've got in my tool belt now, or these are the things that help me. And I think that somehow gives us a bit of confidence that we can get through it again. Ty: Yeah, 100%. Host/Lisa: So I've mentioned some of the things that you do. What's the best place for people to contact you with questions or places to follow you on social media? Ty: If you have any mental health related questions, like just invisible mental health on Instagram and Facebook, or if you want to personally contact me, just Ty Strawford on Instagram would be good. Either or works. Host/Lisa: And just for our listeners today, be well and stay resilient. Thank you so much, Ty. I really appreciate your time and I know that your story will inspire so many people. Oh, and one more thing. If you're like me and you find it helpful to write things out, you will love the Oprah approved promptly journals, especially the peace of Mind Journal. I've been using these for years now. You can check them out at Bitly CalmingJournals. That's bit ly calmingJournals, by the way, when you purchase a promptly journal, you will be supporting this podcast. So thank you so much.

Are you ready to tap into the transformative power of music and journaling? Join host Sabi Dhillon as she shares her deeply personal story of how music became her lifeline during difficult times, and how she created the "Lyrics of the Mind" journal to help others connect with themselves and process their emotions. From childhood struggles to adulthood triumphs, this podcast is a journey of self-discovery and healing that will leave you inspired and ready to unlock your own innermost thoughts and feelings.Lyrics of the Mind Journal is Available Now: https://mymyndspace.com/lyricsofthemindjournal

My guest, Kaytee Gillis, is a psychotherapist, author, and consultant working with survivors of traumatic relationships—whether familial or romantic.She is also a domestic abuse survivor herself. She will talk about this.Her recent book, Invisible Bruises: How a Better Understanding of the Patterns of Domestic Violence Can Help Survivors Navigate the Legal System, sheds light on the ways that the legal system can perpetuate the cycle of domestic violence by failing to recognize patterns that would otherwise hold perpetrators accountable and protect survivors.Kaytee has been featured on iheart radio, the Dr. Wendy Walsh Show, CP24 News out of Toronto, Newsweek, Shaye Ganam's radio show, and numerous articles online including Psychology Today, Psychotherapy Networker, Choosing Therapy, The Mind Journal, The Good Men Project, and many more.She provides training on recognizing patterns of domestic violence and family trauma, and helping survivors move forward.Bill Mitchell WhenDatingHurts.comAn Attractive Offer for You: Hey, if you're a podcast host, here's some advice for you: Use my special link zen.ai/whendatinghurts and use "whendatinghurts" to save 30% off your first three months of Zencastr professional.I want you to have the same experiences I do for all my podcasting and content needs. It's time to share your story using Zencastr.

My guest, Kaytee Gillis, is a psychotherapist, author, and consultant working with survivors of traumatic relationships—whether familial or romantic.  She is also a domestic abuse survivor herself. She will talk about this.  Her recent book, Invisible Bruises: How a Better Understanding of the Patterns of Domestic Violence Can Help Survivors Navigate the Legal System, sheds light on the ways that the legal system can perpetuate the cycle of domestic violence by failing to recognize patterns that would otherwise hold perpetrators accountable and protect survivors.  Kaytee has been featured on iheart radio, the Dr. Wendy Walsh Show, CP24 News out of Toronto, Newsweek, Shaye Ganam's radio show, and numerous articles online including Psychology Today, Psychotherapy Networker, Choosing Therapy, The Mind Journal, The Good Men Project, and many more.  She provides training on recognizing patterns of domestic violence and family trauma, and helping survivors move forward.  Bill MitchellWhenDatingHurts.com ZencastrAn Attractive Offer for You:  Hey, if you're a podcast host, here's some advice for you:Use my special link zen.ai/whendatinghurtsand use "whendatinghurts" to save 30% off your first three months of Zencastr professional.• I want you to have the same experiences I do for all my podcasting and content needs. It's time to share your story using Zencastr. BlendJetUse my special link: zen.ai/WhenDatingHurts12to save 12% at blendjet.com.The discount will be applied at checkout! CureTry Cure today and feel the difference for yourself!  Use my link:  https://zen.ai/WhenDatingHurts1for 20% off your order, coupon activated at check out!Nom Nom  Try Nom Nom today, go to trynom.com/whendatinghurts and get 50% off your first order plus free shipping. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

My guest, Kaytee Gillis, is a psychotherapist, author, and consultant working with survivors of traumatic relationships—whether familial or romantic. She is also a domestic abuse survivor herself. She will talk about this. Her recent book, Invisible Bruises: How a Better Understanding of the Patterns of Domestic Violence Can Help Survivors Navigate the Legal System, sheds light on the ways that the legal system can perpetuate the cycle of domestic violence by failing to recognize patterns that would otherwise hold perpetrators accountable and protect survivors. Kaytee has been featured on iheart radio, the Dr. Wendy Walsh Show, CP24 News out of Toronto, Newsweek, Shaye Ganam's radio show, and numerous articles online including Psychology Today, Psychotherapy Networker, Choosing Therapy, The Mind Journal, The Good Men Project, and many more. She provides training on recognizing patterns of domestic violence and family trauma, and helping survivors move forward. Bill Mitchell WhenDatingHurts.com An Attractive Offer for You: Hey, if you're a podcast host, here's some advice for you: Use my special link zen.ai/whendatinghurts and use "whendatinghurts" to save 30% off your first three months of Zencastr professional. I want you to have the same experiences I do for all my podcasting and content needs. It's time to share your story using Zencastr. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

My guest, Kaytee Gillis, is a psychotherapist, author, and consultant working with survivors of traumatic relationships—whether familial or romantic. She is also a domestic abuse survivor herself. She will talk about this. Her recent book, Invisible Bruises: How a Better Understanding of the Patterns of Domestic Violence Can Help Survivors Navigate the Legal System, sheds light on the ways that the legal system can perpetuate the cycle of domestic violence by failing to recognize patterns that would otherwise hold perpetrators accountable and protect survivors. Kaytee has been featured on iheart radio, the Dr. Wendy Walsh Show, CP24 News out of Toronto, Newsweek, Shaye Ganam's radio show, and numerous articles online including Psychology Today, Psychotherapy Networker, Choosing Therapy, The Mind Journal, The Good Men Project, and many more. She provides training on recognizing patterns of domestic violence and family trauma, and helping survivors move forward. Bill MitchellWhenDatingHurts.comAn Attractive Offer for You:Hey, if you're a podcast host, here's some advice for you: Use my special link zen.ai/whendatinghurts and use "whendatinghurts" to save 30% off your first three months of Zencastr professional.I want you to have the same experiences I do for all my podcasting and content needs. It's time to share your story using Zencastr.

Join licensed clinical social worker, Kaytlyn Gilis, and Kristinf or a discussion about post separation abuse. Often the abuse you've endured while in a partnership with someone escalates once you've separated. Kaytlyn has made this one of her counseling specialties. They take a deep dive into how to protect yourself!Kaytlyn (Kaytee) is a psychotherapist, author, and consultant with a passion for working with survivors of traumatic relationships- whether familial or romantic. She has extensive experience working with survivors of childhood neglect and family trauma. Her recent book, Invisible Bruises: How a Better Understanding of the Patterns of Domestic Violence Can Help Survivors Navigate the Legal System, sheds light on the ways that the legal system can perpetuate the cycle of domestic violence by failing to recognize patterns that would otherwise hold perpetrators accountable and protect survivors. Her blog on Psychology Today, Invisible Bruises, received over 5 million views over the past year.Kaytee has been featured on iheart radio, The Dr. Wendy Walsh Show, CP24 News out of Toronto, Newsweek, Shaye Ganam's radio show, and numerous articles online including Psychology Today, Psychotherapy Networker, Choosing Therapy, The Mind Journal, The Good Men Project, and many others. She provides training on recognizing patterns of domestic violence and family trauma, and helping survivors move forward. Kaytee has given trainings for Zur Institute, TPN, and others.www.kaytlyngillislcsw.com

In this episode, Aaron and Jason discuss a tool to help find the voice of God in our lives. This is a transformational way to begin deepening your walk with God.

On this episode psychotherapist, Kaytee Gillis, LCSW-BACS, chats about her article 6 Steps Toward Recovery From a Toxic Relationship.  She describes the six steps, discusses how survivors can move between the steps, Kaytee is a psychotherapist, author, and consultant with a passion for working with survivors of relationship and family trauma. Her first book, Invisible Bruises: How a Better Understanding of the Patterns of Domestic Violence Can Help Survivors Navigate the Legal System, released in 2021, sheds light on the ways that the legal system can perpetuate the cycle of domestic violence by failing to recognize patterns that would otherwise hold perpetrators accountable and protect survivors. Her new book, It's not High Conflict, It's Post Separation Abuse is set to be released in February. Kaytee has been featured on Psychology Today, iheart radio, Psychotherapy Networker, The Dr. Wendy Walsh Show, CP24 News out of Toronto, Newsweek, The Mind Journal, Shaye Ganam's radio show, and numerous others. To get in touch with Kaytee: www.kaytlyngillislcsw.com Instagram: @KurleeKaytee Instagram: @Claras_ _Voice – support for survivors and allies Facebook: Claras Voice- a group in support of survivors and allies Twitter: @Kaytee_Gillis Blog: Invisible Bruises, Psychology Today

This week's episode is all about hobbies and the influence they can have on our personalities. Please share your thoughts in the comments below!  P.S. Have you signed up for Copy.ai yet? Download and use Newsly on www.newsly.me today!     Episode Shout-out to Mind Journal and President Trump video  Music Intro/Outro: “Thoughts” by Killah Smilez Music Outro: “Explained” by Killah Smilez Make sure you check out the Killah Smilez song on Amazon Catch the music video by Killah Smilez HERE                           We're always working on new products and ideas, but sometimes it takes a little extra cash to bring them to life. Your financial support for the work we do means the world to us! Donate HERE!   ----more---- Shop WokeNFree Designs   Create your own Bonfire Shop Today! Get our book HERE Check out our course on the Law of Attraction HERE Need advice? Connect with Natasha HERE Want to share the episode? Please share the episode on Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, YouTube, Pinterest, TikTok, and Soundcloud   Don't forget to subscribe to WokeNFree on iTunes, Stitcher, TuneIn, iHeartRadio, and Google Play Do you want to join the show as a guest on an upcoming episode? Contact us HERE Don't forget to submit a scenario to us for SCENARIO TIME!    SCENARIO TIME: How would you respond to these scenarios in SCENARIO TIME? Let's chat HERE!  Have you reviewed our show yet? Pick your platform of choice HERE      Do you want to start a podcast? We are here to HELP! Schedule a FREE strategy session with us HERE This post contains affiliate links. That means if you click on a link and buy something, WokeNFree will earn a small commission from the advertiser at no additional cost to you.

In this episode Anne-Marie and Sary take on the B-Word - BOUNDARIES! Join in as we define their own personal “Garden” and explore what setting boundaries means, why it is so important to know what we care about, what we require to consciously create what we want and what to consider when setting boundaries in relationships.  Fact Check:1. Sary referenced the author Brianna Wiest book “The Minds Journal”.  The books that she is accredited for writing are 101 essays to change the way you think, The Truth About Everything and The Human Element. The Mind Journal is an online multi authored collaborative weblog discussing psychological relationships, mental health, parenting, abuse, self development and astrology. The owner is Mind's Journal OPC . Founder Sakahi Choidhary. Key people Linda Greyman. 2. Sary said boundaries means” having the courage to live a life you are proud of and start over if need be. Boundaries, according to Positive Psychology, is a limit or space between you and the other person - a clear place where you begin and the other person ends. The purpose of setting a healthy boundary is of course to protect and take good care of you. 3. Both Sary and Anne Marie reference the book Boundaries by Dr. Henry Cloud and Dr. John Townsend several times throughout the episode.  Full title with subtitle and both authors full names including their titles are: Boundaries, When to Say Yes How to Say No To Take Control of Your Life by Dr. Henry Cloud and Dr. John Townsend.4. The Hoffman Quadrinity Process®, founded by Bob Hoffman in 1967 is a week-long residential and personal growth retreat that helps participants identify negative behaviors, moods, and ways of thinking that developed unconsciously and were conditioned in childhood.The Process will help you become conscious of and disconnected from negative patterns of thought and behaviors on an emotional, intellectual, physical, and spiritual level in order to make significant positive changes in your life. You will learn to remove habitual ways of thinking and behaving, align with your authentic self, and respond to situations in your life from a place of conscious choice.

Journaling is one of the most useful activities a trader can engage in to help them become better traders, power their development, and help them refine their trading practice. However, it is also one of those activities that people think is a great idea but is something they think they'll do another day, or they do a half-hearted effort. The exceptions are usually ‘exceptional people'. People who are willing to go that extra mile, put in the hard yards, take the time to learn about themselves and reflect on their trading. Our guests today are Steve Ward and Simon Cotterill. Together they have conceived, constructed, and published an outstanding new book/journal called the ‘Trader's Mind Journal'. Steve Ward will be familiar to AlphaMind listeners and traders more widely. Steven has worked in the field of High Performance over many decades, he worked with Olympic Athletes, High Stakes Poker Players, Leaders in Business and with Traders and Investors in the Financial Markets. Steve realised the similarities between high performance sports and the trading world and developed a performance practice which has helped many traders make lasting improvements. Steven wrote his first book, High Performance Trading, a few years ago. It became an instant hit amongst traders and has seen his reputation in this world soar. Last year he released Bulletproof Trader to great acclaim. Simon Coterill came to trading after successfully running a printing company for many years. He started trading in 2010 and since 2014 has been day trading for his full-time career.Simon focused initially on technical analysis but increasingly recognised the importance of Developing his psychology around trading. The Traders Mind Journal started as a project to develop a personal trading journal for his own use, however coming from a printing background, he started to explore the possibility of creating a more formal trading journal structure to use.  Steve and Simon have been working together over the past couple of years to design, construct and produce the Traders Mind Journal. The journal is a fantastic product which will be hugely useful and valuable to traders as a personal reflection and development tool. The Traders Mind Journal is the best ‘published trading journal' we have come across. We are delighted to announce that listeners of the AlphaMind Podcast can obtain a 15% discount off the face value price of the Trader's Mind Journal by inputting the code AMP15 when they order the book direct from Trader's Mind Journal on the website https://www.tradersmindjournal.com/You can also follow them on twitter https://twitter.com/mind_traders

Before we can trust our brain to discern what is true, we must build a few brain skills. Learning to declutter our brain is one of those skills. Once you listen, you will want to download a free copy of Guidelines to a Beginner’s Mind Journal here.

Dr. Natalie Jones, PsyD., LPCC is a licensed psychotherapist who specializes in working with African American women who have experienced relationship trauma and narcissistic abuse, African American mental health issues, as well as with individuals who were previously incarcerated. Dr. Jones has a podcast called A Date with Darkness Podcast, which specializes in providing education and tips on healing from narcissistic abuse in relationships. Dr. Jones received her masters in clinical counseling psychology from the Chicago School of Professional Psychology in Chicago, IL, and her doctorate in clinical psychology from the California School of Professional Psychology in San Francisco, CA. Dr. Jones has also written blogs for the Mind Journal, Therapy for Black Girls, and PsychCentral. In this episode, we touch on narcissistic abuse in romantic relationships, emotional manipulation towards African American women, love bombing, love addiction, sexual female empowerment, trauma bonding, and more.FOLLOW DR. JONES:WEBSITE: www.drnataliejones.comINSTA: @dr.nataliejones / @adatewithdarknesspodcastPODCAST: www.adatewithdarkness.comFACEBOOK: /drnataliejonesTWITTER: @Dr_NatalieJonesCONTACT TARA:INSTA: @tara.mont / @trustandthriveYOUTUBE: Tara MontFACEBOOK: bit.ly/FBtaramontWEBSITE: www.tara-mont.comEMAIL: tara@tara-mont.com

We have all had experiences in our lives that impact us to one degree or another. I know that specifically traumatic events that happen to us or even around us can get overlooked and perhaps even undervalued. We are taught to push through difficulties, we're told we're survivors, and in our fast-paced society, we can often look for a quick fix if anything. This may work for the short term, but old familiar patterns can reoccur, pain resurfaces and it's not uncommon to get discouraged and begin to lose hope or faith. Wherever you are in the process ... whatever your experiences have been along the way, your journey is just that... it's a journey. We all do the best we can. I truly believe that and I am committed to what I believe in, and I believe in you. I also believe through our experiences, we are better able to understand, help and support each other. For this reason, It's my great privilege and pleasure to introduce you to my long time, dear friend, Elle Miller. It's through her personal experiences, with great heart and compassion, Elle has cultivated spaces that acknowledge the pains, traumas, and sorrows of life, while guiding individuals toward awareness of their own potential and possibility. She is a trauma-informed yoga therapist, therapeutic yoga instructor and specialist, she's a spiritual director and supervisor, educator, advocate and an amazing mother! Through her practice, she's helped re-shape the lives of so many individuals, she's written numerous articles for Thrive Global, Addicted 2 Success, Mind Journal and she's an author! Her book, which is titled, "Amazement: Reclaiming the Brilliance of Wonder" is absolutely beautiful and heartfelt. I recommend it to anyone as a companion along the journey. Enjoy and absorb as Elle Miller shares her beautiful insights, her wisdom and experience with you. I know this is for you, right now. She's so refreshing, and you're going to be blessed....You can reach Elle Miller at www.elledmiller.com Elle Miller on FacebookSupport the show (https://www.paypal.com/cgi-bin/webscr?cmd=_s-xclick&hosted_button_id=XQGW7QET8K8FU&source=url)

In this episode, you'll hear how a designer and entrepreneur from the UK turned a personal tragedy into a compelling story and business that has helped thousands of men live better lives.Ollie Aplin is the co-founder of MindJournal, the global men's journaling movement a mission to help guys feel happier and healthier.We ask him:Why journaling and why journaling for men?Why launch on Kickstarter? (Building a community and validation was key)How did you overcome the fear of putting yourself out there and taking a risk both emotionally and financially?What lessons have you learned about yourself, or entrepreneurship since launching in 2016The one piece of advice you would give to other entrepreneurs who are thinking about launching a new business or product in 2020Links MentionedKickstarterMindjournals - Use code KURT20 to get 20% off your first JournalIG:@ollieaplinDo Purpose by David HieattNever miss an episodeSubscribe wherever you get your podcastsJoin Kurt's newsletterHelp the showAsk a question in The Unofficial Shopify Podcast Facebook GroupLeave a reviewSubscribe wherever you get your podcastsWhat's Kurt up to?See our recent work at EthercycleSubscribe to our YouTube ChannelApply to work with Kurt to grow your store.SponsorsGet powerful marketing automation with Klaviyo's revenue-driving email platformTry Bold Product Upsell, free trialSave 20% on Turbo, a blazing fast Shopify theme - Use code PODCAST20 at checkoutImprove your shop's search engine ranking with Venntov SEO Meta Manager

Ollie is the founder of Mind Journal. A unique journaling brand that was born from a lifetime of personal tragedy and recovery. Ollie has used journaling to bring himself out of the darkness and change his life for the better. In this episode he shares his tragic story, how journaling changed his life, how you can start your journaling practice, the benefits of journaling for every area of your life, what makes Mind Journal different, how he launched the company in 2016 and has gone on to help tens of thousands of men worldwide start journaling plus much more. https://www.mindjournals.com/ @mindjournal --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/thekinetikfitnessshow/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/thekinetikfitnessshow/support

Dr. Natalie Jones is a licensed professional clinical counselor specializing in helping women overcome abusive relationships with narcissists. I really hate that this is so prevalent in my work, but it is. I also dislike that narcissism and narcissistic abuse take up so much time in my practice. However, they do and I am a true believer that understanding narcissism and how to navigate divorce and later, co-parenting with a narcissist is so very important. And so I have turned to an expert in this for a conversation about all things narcissism. Dr. Jones and I cover many topics related to narcissism including the hallmark characteristics of a narcissist, setting healthy boundaries safely and effectively, and even the ever-puzzling question, “Why do we date or marry the same type of person over and over again?” I’m excited to share our conversation with you. Show Highlights The spectrum of narcissism and hallmark characteristics of a narcissist What it’s like to be in a relationship with a narcissist, being “love bombed,” and not stepping outside of the “bubble” How to set healthy boundaries safely and effectively with a narcissist Things to consider when it comes to safety and leaving How Dr. Jones suggests you approach leaving a partner when kids are involved How to go from being manipulated and controlled, to a person that has solid boundaries Addressing grief of the broken fantasy Why we date or marry the same type of person over and over again and how we can rewrite  our relationship story Tools to help build up self-esteem, looking at inner dialogue, inner critic and inner child Learn More About Dr. Jones: Dr. Natalie Jones, PsyD., LPCC is an Licensed professional clinical counselor and a post doctoral intern. She currently has a private practice called Lifetime Counseling and Consulting in CA where she specializes in working with women who have been in emotionally and psychologically abusive relationships with narcissists, as well as with individuals who were previously incarcerated for various crimes.  Dr. Jones has a podcast called A Date With Darkness Podcast, which specializes in providing education and tips from healing from narcissistic relationships. Dr. Jones received her masters in clinical counseling psychology from the Chicago School of Professional Psychology in Chicago, IL, and her doctorate in clinical psychology from the California School of Professional Psychology in San Francisco, CA. Dr. Jones has also written blogs for the Mind Journal and PsychCentral. Links:Dr. Jones website: https://www.drnataliejones.com Dr. Jones’ social media links Dr. Jones on Instagram   A Date with Darkness Podcast Instagram Dr. Jones on Facebook A Date with Darkness Facebook Page A Date with Darkness Facebook Group Dr. Jones on Twitter A Date with Darkness on Twitter Resources: The Ultimate Divorce Survival Guide Should I Stay or Should I Go Facebook Group

In this episode, I talk shop with Sidonie Warren, one of the founders of Papersmiths. Papersmiths is a small chain of stationery stores with a highly curated and beautiful range. Sidonie and Kyle started Papersmiths with just £500 and now has 5 stores in Brighton, Bristol and London. During our chat we spoke about:- The Papersmith Story and how it all began - The challenges of growing an independent retail business - What’s next for Papersmiths - How Sidonie finds new products - The best way to get in touch and submit your products to Papersmiths - Trade shows - What will be hot for this autumn and much more  Connect with Papersmithshttps://www.papersmiths.co.ukhttps://www.facebook.com/shoppapersmithshttps://www.instagram.com/paper_smiths/https://twitter.com/paper_smiths Links mentioned in this episodeCass Art https://www.cassart.co.uk/Hello Day https://www.hellodayplanner.com/Small business Sunday https://www.theopaphitissbs.com/Department of international trade https://www.great.gov.uk/National Stationery Show in New York https://www.nationalstationeryshow.com/NY Now https://www.nynow.comMaison Object https://www.maison-objet.com/enPodcast episode 2 with Henri DavisLife Rocks https://healinginyourhands.co.ukThe Completist https://the-completist.comCubitts https://www.cubitts.com/Glossier https://www.glossier.comPonder Lilly https://ponderlily.com/Mind Journal https://www.mindjournals.com/ Connect with meWebsite: https://www.smallbusinesscollaborative.co.uk/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/small_business_collaborative/Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/letstalkwholesale/Work with me: https://www.smallbusinesscollaborative.co.uk/servicesBook a discovery call: https://www.smallbusinesscollaborative.co.uk/book-a-discovery-call          Book a Power-hour: https://www.smallbusinesscollaborative.co.uk/power-hourApply to be a guest on Let’s Talk Shop https://thereseoertenblad.typeform.com/to/ZPiHVX

In this episode, I talk shop with Sidonie Warren, one of the founders of Papersmiths. Papersmiths is a small chain of stationery stores with a highly curated and beautiful range. Sidonie and Kyle started Papersmiths with just £500 and now has 5 stores in Brighton, Bristol and London. During our chat we spoke about:- The Papersmith Story and how it all began - The challenges of growing an independent retail business - What’s next for Papersmiths - How Sidonie finds new products - The best way to get in touch and submit your products to Papersmiths - Trade shows - What will be hot for this autumn and much more  Connect with Papersmithshttps://www.papersmiths.co.ukhttps://www.facebook.com/shoppapersmithshttps://www.instagram.com/paper_smiths/https://twitter.com/paper_smiths Links mentioned in this episodeCass Art https://www.cassart.co.uk/Hello Day https://www.hellodayplanner.com/Small business Sunday https://www.theopaphitissbs.com/Department of international trade https://www.great.gov.uk/National Stationery Show in New York https://www.nationalstationeryshow.com/NY Now https://www.nynow.comMaison Object https://www.maison-objet.com/enPodcast episode 2 with Henri DavisLife Rocks https://healinginyourhands.co.ukThe Completist https://the-completist.comCubitts https://www.cubitts.com/Glossier https://www.glossier.comPonder Lilly https://ponderlily.com/Mind Journal https://www.mindjournals.com/ Connect with meWebsite: https://www.smallbusinesscollaborative.co.uk/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/small_business_collaborative/Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/letstalkwholesale/Work with me: https://www.smallbusinesscollaborative.co.uk/servicesBook a discovery call: https://www.smallbusinesscollaborative.co.uk/book-a-discovery-call          Book a Power-hour: https://www.smallbusinesscollaborative.co.uk/power-hourApply to be a guest on Let’s Talk Shop https://thereseoertenblad.typeform.com/to/ZPiHVX

In this episode, I talk shop with Sidonie Warren, one of the founders of Papersmiths. Papersmiths is a small chain of stationery stores with a highly curated and beautiful range. Sidonie and Kyle started Papersmiths with just £500 and now has 5 stores in Brighton, Bristol and London. During our chat we spoke about:- The Papersmith Story and how it all began - The challenges of growing an independent retail business - What’s next for Papersmiths - How Sidonie finds new products - The best way to get in touch and submit your products to Papersmiths - Trade shows - What will be hot for this autumn and much more  Connect with Papersmithshttps://www.papersmiths.co.ukhttps://www.facebook.com/shoppapersmithshttps://www.instagram.com/paper_smiths/https://twitter.com/paper_smiths Links mentioned in this episodeCass Art https://www.cassart.co.uk/Hello Day https://www.hellodayplanner.com/Small business Sunday https://www.theopaphitissbs.com/Department of international trade https://www.great.gov.uk/National Stationery Show in New York https://www.nationalstationeryshow.com/NY Now https://www.nynow.comMaison Object https://www.maison-objet.com/enPodcast episode 2 with Henri DavisLife Rocks https://healinginyourhands.co.ukThe Completist https://the-completist.comCubitts https://www.cubitts.com/Glossier https://www.glossier.comPonder Lilly https://ponderlily.com/Mind Journal https://www.mindjournals.com/ Connect with meWebsite: https://www.smallbusinesscollaborative.co.uk/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/small_business_collaborative/Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/letstalkwholesale/Work with me: https://www.smallbusinesscollaborative.co.uk/servicesBook a discovery call: https://www.smallbusinesscollaborative.co.uk/book-a-discovery-call          Book a Power-hour: https://www.smallbusinesscollaborative.co.uk/power-hourApply to be a guest on Let’s Talk Shop https://thereseoertenblad.typeform.com/to/ZPiHVX

Today I have a great interview with Dr. Natalie Jones, who is a licensed professional clinical counselor specializing in helping women overcome abusive relationships with narcissists. I really hate that this is so prevalent in my work, but it is. I also dislike that narcissism and narcissistic abuse take up so much time in my practice. However, they do and I am a true believer that understanding narcissism and how to navigate divorce and later, co-parenting with a narcissist is so very important. And so I have turned to an expert in this for a conversation about all things narcissism. Dr. Jones and I cover many topics related to narcissism including the hallmark characteristics of a narcissist, setting healthy boundaries safely and effectively, and even the ever-puzzling question, “Why do we date or marry the same type of person over and over again?” I’m excited to share our conversation with you. Show Highlights The spectrum of narcissism and hallmark characteristics of a narcissist (3:29) What it’s like to be in a relationship with a narcissist, being “love bombed,” and not stepping outside of the “bubble” (5:04) How to set healthy boundaries safely and effectively with a narcissist (18:40) Things to consider when it comes to safety and leaving (21:03) How Dr. Jones suggests you approach leaving a partner when kids are involved (25:09) How to go from being manipulated and controlled, to a person that has solid boundaries (27:25) Addressing grief of the broken fantasy (31:34) Why we date or marry the same type of person over and over again and how we can rewrite  our relationship story (35:13) Tools to help build up self-esteem, looking at inner dialogue, inner critic and inner child (42:01) Learn More About Natalie: Dr. Natalie Jones, PsyD., LPCC is an Licensed professional clinical counselor and a post doctoral intern. She currently has a private practice called Lifetime Counseling and Consulting in CA where she specializes in working with women who have been in emotionally and psychologically abusive relationships with narcissists, as well as with individuals who were previously incarcerated for various crimes.  Dr. Jones has a podcast called A Date With Darkness Podcast, which specializes in providing education and tips from healing from narcissistic relationships. Dr. Jones received her masters in clinical counseling psychology from the Chicago School of Professional Psychology in Chicago, IL, and her doctorate in clinical psychology from the California School of Professional Psychology in San Francisco, CA. Dr. Jones has also written blogs for the Mind Journal and PsychCentral. Links: Dr. Jones website: https://www.drnataliejones.com Dr. Jones’ social media linksDr. Jones on Instagram  A Date with Darkness Podcast Instagram Dr. Jones on FacebookA Date with Darkness Facebook PageA Date with Darkness Facebook GroupDr. Jones on TwitterA Date with Darkness on Twitter Resources:NEW! The Ultimate Divorce Survival GuideShould I Stay or Should I Go Facebook Group

This week on the Continual Growth Podcast we had the pleasure of interviewing the King of 'Journaling' himself Mr. Ollie Aplin of Mind Journal. This will be the first time on our podcast that we get the opportunity to explore the act of journaling and how/why we believe it is essential to your personal growth. Ollie takes us on a journey dating back about 10 years ago to help paint the picture of how he started to journal, and the important life experiences that led him to creating a product (Mind Journal) that is helping hundreds and thousands of people across the planet. This episode will debunk any myths you may have previously heard/had about writing in a journal, and instead inspire you to begin self-expressing through your own words on paper. Let's get right into it!Ps. Use the special promo-code "GROWTH" (All caps) and receive a 10% discount to purchase yourself a Mind Journal. A great gift for yourself and others.

Episode 23 TITLE Narcissism and the Highly Sensitive Person GUEST Dr. Natalie Jones EPISODE OVERVIEW What is narcissism? What does it look like in relationships (romantic and parental).  Gaslighting—what is it? The connection between narcissists and HSPs (partners and parents). The HSP is often the scapegoat in the family.  There may be a golden child and the children are pitted against each other. If you have a parent who is narcisstic, the HS child often feels guilty and believes what the narcissistic   parent tells them (you’re too sensitive; too selfish; you never call me; you don’t care).  Once people understand narcissism, they see that the limitation is in the parent, NOT the HSP. The energy of the room changes when the narcissist enters the room, and leaves the room.  You can FEEL the energy shift. HIGHLIGHTS What someone who is in a relationship with someone with narcissistic  traits may be experiencing Anxiety, depression, ambivalence Not sure where they stand in the relationship Unable to discuss serious problems Don’t’ know the future of the relationship Self-doubt and questioning Partner isn’t meeting your emotional needs What do narcisstic traits look like? It’s on a spectrum—mild, moderate, medium and severe They feel better than you They are in their own special category—they feel “special” and “above” you Hypocracy—do as I say, but not as I do—these rules apply to you, but not to me They objectify people—everything is seen as property and an extension of the narcissist You can make decisions without their approval There is danger when you want to leave the relationship They have a God-like or superior complex The believe they are special/beautiful and surround themselves with others they perceive to have the same superior qualities Narcisstic Personality Disorder is one of the cluster B Personality Disorders, among Antisocial Personality Disorder, Borderline Personality Disorder & Histrionic Personality Disorder Fully Diagnosed Narcisstic Personality Disorder affects approximately 1-2% of the population. These are rare and extreme cases, and they tend to be part of the criminal justice system. What are red flags in the beginning of a relationship so you can spot someone with narcisstic traits? They have inconsistent, tumultuous, and short-term relationships with family, friends and partners. They are either the hero or the victim They appear too good to be true. They can be super charming, good looking and win people over easily in the beginning The move quickly in relationships. They have whirlwind romances; have sex early on in a relationship; rush to get married; rush to have children There is a degree of secrecy re: prior relationships. You feel like you don’t really know them, and they won’t discuss their problems They introduce you to family and close friends very quickly, but you seem to be insignificant to family and friends since they are always introducing a new partner What types of people do narcissists tend to look for in partners? People they can control, pressure or subject a position of power over or they can easily isolate They like empathic people like Highly Sensitive Persons (HSPs) because they can play their heartstrings and the HSP is more likely to forgive them They won’t seek out other narcissists or powerful people (too much conflict) People who have a history or trauma, so they can retraumatize you and they know how to find your wounds and use them against you They tend to align themselves with people (not partners) of greater status They name drop—people they don’t know, but it’s to feel powerful What is gaslighting? It’s psychological brainwashing Manipulating someone psychologically so that person questions their reality The person doesn’t trust their own perceptions or themselves It’s like living in the Twilight Zone Jim Jones is an example They will compliment and degrade you in the same sentence They will change the topic in order to deflect or to blame They will triangulate with a 3rd party to invalidate you and make you doubt yourself They project their insecurities onto you They have tantrums and showdowns—especially on holidays or special occasions and you feel bad and doubt yourself. What does it look like if you have a narcisstic parent? The parent is not invested in your or the problems that come up for you They will make it about them—i.e., Had it not been for me, then you (minimize your experience) They often will just say, “Because I’m your mother/father.” They will tell you, “That’s not a real problem.” People who have a narcisstic parent may dissociate, turn the radio up, or find ways to “check out.” They may keep contact with the narcisstic parent short and sweet Narcisstic parents will call their children names, take advantage of them, expect them to care for the other siblings You can feel the energy in the room change when a narcissist enters and when they leave the room.  It’s like they pull energy from the room, and everyone feels it. RESOURCES Podcasts A Date With Darkness—Dr. Natalie Jones  https://drnataliejones.com/podcast/ Codependency No More—Brian Piser https://www.codependencynomore.com/category/podcast/ Love Junkie: Help for the Relationship Obsessed, Love Addicted, & Codependent—Shena Tubbs https://www.listennotes.com/podcasts/love-junkie-help-for-the-relationship-uNjKz54H8fe/ Books Toxic Parents by Susan Forward Mothers Who Can’t Love by Susan Forward Unspoken Legacy: Addressing the Impact of Trauma and Addiction within the Family by Claudia Black Why Does He Do That? Inside the Minds of Angry and Controlling Men  By Lundy Bancroft The Dance of Anger: A Woman's Guide To Changing The Patterns Of Intimate Relationships by Harriet Lerner   The Dance of Intimacy: A Woman's Guide to Courageous Acts of Change in Key Relationships by Harriet Lerner   The Dance of Fear: Rising Above Anxiety, Fear, and Shame to Be Your Best and Bravest Self by Harriet Lerner    Women Who Love Too Much: When You Keep Wishing and Hoping He'll Change  by Robin Norwood Confessions of a Narcissist by HG Tudor (there are MANY books by this author) Will I Ever Be Good Enough?: Healing the Daughters of Narcissistic  Mothers by Dr. Karyl McBride Ph.D.   Difficult Mothers, Adult Daughters: A Guide For Separation, Liberation & Inspiration  by Karen C.L. Anderson Surviving Mama An Adult Daughter’s Guide by Dr. Pamela Everett Thompson Youtuber Kim Saeed-- https://www.youtube.com/user/LetMeReach           BIO Dr. Natalie Jones, PsyD., LPCC is a Licensed professional clinical counselor and a post doctoral intern. She currently has a private practice called Lifetime Counseling and Consulting in CA where she specializes in working with women who have been in emotionally and psychologically abusive relationships with narcissists, as well as with individuals who were previously incarcerated for various crimes. Dr. Jones has a podcast called A Date With Darkness Podcast, which specializes in providing education and tips from healing from narcissistic  relationships. Dr. Jones received her masters in clinical counseling psychology from the Chicago School of Professional Psychology in Chicago, IL, and her doctorate in clinical psychology from the California School of Professional Psychology in San Francisco, CA. Dr. Jones has also written blogs for the Mind Journal and PsychCentral.   PODCAST HOST   Patricia Young, LCSW is a therapist in San Diego who is in private practice.  Patricia works primarily with Highly Sensitive People (HSP) helping them understand their HSPness, and to turn their perceived shortcomings into superpowers.  Patricia is passionate about providing education to help HSPs and non-HSPs understand and truly appreciate all the gifts they have to offer.  Patricia provides online (telehealth) therapy to people who live in California.  We meet over a private platform (similar to Skype), and you can have therapy from the privacy of your own home—when the kids are at school or are napping; from work; in your pajamas, or when you just can’t face sitting in traffic or going out.   LINKS https://www.drnataliejones.com https://www.adatewithdarkness.com. IG: https://www.instagram.com/dr.nataliejones/ IG2: https://www.instagram.com/adatewithdarknesspodcast/ FB: https://www.facebook.com/drnataliejones/ FB2: https://www.facebook.com/adatewithdarkness/ FB Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/196036654267594/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/Dr_NatalieJones Twitter 2: https://twitter.com/ADateWDarkness   To write a review in itunes: click on this link https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/unapologetically-sensitive/id1440433481?mt=2 select “view in itunes” chose “open in itunes” choose “ratings and reviews” click to rate the number of starts click “write a review”     Website--www.patriciayounglcsw.com Podcast--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook--https://www.facebook.com/Patricia-Young-LCSW-162005091044090/ Facebook group Unapologetically Sensitive-- https://www.facebook.com/groups/2099705880047619/ Instagram--https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube--https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail—unapologeticallysensitive@gmail.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive MUSIC—Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com  

Is your brain so stuffed it has no room for new ideas anymore? This fascinating podcast offers a solution and a free gift to help you reclaim your creative freshness. Once you listen, you will want to download a free copy of Guidelines to a Beginner's Mind Journal here.

When is the last time you evaluated your community? Some of us are dealing with unhealthy relationships and suffering in silence. Dr. Jones teaches us how to determine if our current support is inadequate and how to find support that best meets our needs. Dr. Natalie Jones, PsyD, LPCC is a Licensed Professional Clinical Counselor and a Post-Doctoral Psychologist. She currently has a private practice called Lifetime Counseling and Consulting in Oakland, CA where she specializes in working with women who have been in emotionally and psychologically abusive relationships with narcissists, as well as with individuals who were previously incarcerated for various crimes. Dr. Jones also works for the California Dept of Corrections and specializes in providing individual/group counseling and assessments to prison inmates who have committed various offenses, with a specialization in working with sex offenders. Dr. Jones has a podcast called A Date With Darkness Podcast, which specializes in providing education and tips from healing from narcissistic relationships. Dr. Jones received her Master’s in Clinical Counseling Psychology from the Chicago School of Professional Psychology in Chicago, IL, and her Doctorate in Clinical Psychology from the California School of Professional Psychology in San Francisco, CA. Dr. Jones has also written blogs for the Mind Journal and PsychCentral. Special Guest: Dr. Natalie Jones Website: https://www.drnataliejones.com https://www.adatewithdarkness.com Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dr.nataliejones/ https://www.instagram.com/adatewithdarknesspodcast/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/drnataliejones/ https://www.facebook.com/adatewithdarkness/ https://www.facebook.com/groups/196036654267594/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/Dr_NatalieJones https://twitter.com/ADateWDarkness Where to find us Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/drjanaetaylor/ https://www.facebook.com/groups/474095289596388/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/drjanaetaylor/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/Mindingmyblkbiz Email: info@mindingmyblackbusiness.com Website: www.mindingmyblackbusiness.com Don’t forget to Like, Subscribe, and Comment!

Narcissism is: Clinically speaking, narcissitic personality disorder is defined as: a sense of grandiosity (put themselves in a god-like category), sense of entitlement, want to control everything and everyone around them. Their relationships are short term, like a roller coaster. The people they keep around them are ones they can use. They won't be intimate or vulnerable. They lie. They are obsessed with being brilliant, successful, or beautiful. Will only associate with people who are the best. Can be a delusional component; they believe people are jealous of them. They also can feel an intense amount of jealousy, insecurity, or envy. Pop-culture defines a narcissist as: someone who has a lack of empathy, puts their feelings above everyone else's, they feel very entitled, and are very manipulative. Gaslighting. The relationship becomes very parasitic. Dr. Natalie Jones specialises in counseling women of color with narcissistic mothers. She identifies what narcissism means, how to detect if that's what we lived (or live) with, and how to break the cycle. BIO: Dr. Natalie Jones, PsyD., LPCC is an Licensed professional clinical counselor and a post doctoral psychologist. She currently has a private practice called Lifetime Counseling and Consulting in Oakland, CA where she specializes in working with women who have been in emotionally and psychologically abusive relationships with narcissists, as well as with individuals who were previously incarcerated for various crimes. Dr. Jones also works for the California Dept of Corrections and specializes in providing individual/group counseling and assessments to prison inmates who have committed various offenses, with a specialization in working with sex offenders. Dr. Jones also has a podcast called A Date With Darkness Podcast, which specializes in providing education and tips from healing from narcissistic relationships. Dr. Jones received her masters in clinical counseling psychology from the Chicago School of Professional Psychology in Chicago, IL, and her doctorate in clinical psychology from the California School of Professional Psychology in San Francisco, CA. Dr. Jones has also written blogs for the Mind Journal and PsychCentral. A few things we talked about: Just like animals who have parasites become sickly, so do we when we have a parasidic narcissist attached to us. There are women who are in abusive relationships lose part of themselves and may become physically sick. Go to 30:17-31:01 to listen to this part People who have been raised by a narcissistist have a greater liklihood of being in a relationship with a narcissist. People who are in a relationship with a narcissist may find comfort in that relationship because there's comfort in what we know. They might not want to change. If the person is a true narcisstic person, you can limit contact or make the coversation superficial. Or limiting talking to once or twice a year at holidays when you can walk away. Know that the narcissist will not change unless they want to, which rarely happens. Do not expect them to change. They feel like they don't have the problem. When narcissists go to treatment, it's usually to prove how you're the problem and they're so wonderful. You can't typically have a superficial relationship with a relationship partner. They need everything focused on them. Don't stay in this relationship for your kids. If the person is treating you like garbage, that's abuse, and your kids are seeing you be abused. Even if they're "nice" parents, if they treat you like dirt that isn't good parenting. If someone is abusing you, there's a chance they're abusing your kids and you don't know it. Narcissism indicators: You have to do a lot of work just to have a relationship with the narcissistic person. (Much more than a normal relationship.) You have to mentally prepare yourself to go "into a war-zone" when you're going to deal with them. You feel like you can't have a healthy conversation with the person. You have to hide part of your life from them because they use information to attack you, use it against you in a moment of weakness, or they'll try to hold it over you later. If you notice those things, ask yourself why. Many people think they have to respect their parents, but don't know exactly what their definition of what respect is. Often, the word respect is misused. Do they respect you, or hold you emotionally hostage? Do they try to control you to be a certain way so they can get what they want, but you don't get what you want from the relationship. We feel like we don't know them. We know how they act, or their behaviors, but we don't know the intimacies and intracasies of their life. Is it healthy to break the tie with a narcisstic person? "Yes, it might even be necessary or life-saving to break that tie." You're in a relationship with two people: you're in a relationship with the actual parent, and they're also in a relationship with the fantasy or idea of what their parent should be, or what they hope one day they can be." It's important to reconcile reality from fantasy. Chances are they are not going to change.   More facts about narcissism according to Dr. Jones: 99.9% of the time, people that were raised by abusive parents, and have children of their own, have the abuse manifest in some way with their own children. The number one indicator is that typically what happens when moms lash out with their own children, is that they have guilt. "I'm acting like the person I never wanted to be." Pay attention to guilt. If you notice it coming up, go to a therapist, or to the bookstore and get a book about this. If the people who know and care about you notice a problem with your own parenting, listen. Don't be defensive. Biggest telltale sign is your kids. If you're manifesting behaviors towards, your kids, there will be a reminder of the past. They might feel like they can't come to you or talk to you. They might even be afraid or intimitated by you. BOOKS to help you learn more: "Narcisstic Families, Assessment and Treatment" "Narcisstic Mothers" Dr. Susan Forward, "Toxic Families" Anything by H.G. Tudor - books and videos on YouTube Kim Saeed has videos on YouTube about narcissism Anything by Lundy Vancroft Anything by Susan Anderson     ------------------- Dr. Natalie Jones' advice to women whose parent is a narcissistic: Find a surrogate parent, or parent-like figure who can fulfill healthier roles for you. The idea of what you thought your parent some day could be. Dr. Natalie Jones' advice to a mom in a relationship with a narcissist: Think about what this means for you and what you want to do about it. Do you want it to stop, or do you want to just have an awareness of what's happening? Research on the internet and bounce ideas off friends. If you're questioning some things, write them down, and think about it more. Get a therapist you can talk to regularly who specializes in working with these kinds of situations. Be safe. You might not want your partner to see what you're reading, or your notes so they can't access it. Be selective about who you share information with so they don't share the information with the narcisstic person. Dr. Natilie Jones' Superpower: She is a human lie detector. She can tell if someone is lying or conning within seconds.   If you need help in the U.S. - The Domestic Violence Hotline in the U.S. is: 1−800−799−7233 If you are needing help with rent, utilites, and more, you can call the United Way at 2-1-1.   You can find Dr. Natalie Jones Contact: https://www.drnataliejones.com https://www.adatewithdarkness.com Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dr.nataliejones/ Instagram2: https://www.instagram.com/adatewithdarknesspodcast/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/drnataliejones/ Facebook 2: https://www.facebook.com/adatewithdarkness/ Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/196036654267594/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/Dr_NatalieJones Twitter 2: https://twitter.com/ADateWDarkness   Thank you for joining me today!  Want more? Go to HardyMom.com and you'll find ways to live well, grow, and enjoy your life again -with any health challenges. I'd love to hear what you think about this episode! Send me a message at HardyMom.com/contact Have a blessed week, Jen

Let me introduce you to Ollie Aplin, designer and author of This Book Will Make You Stronger. We’re talking about mental health. Like, really talking about it. We cover deep issues like bipolar disorder, suicide, and drug use. If you, or someone you know is affected by any of these issues then please head to my site for resources to help you. Otherwise listen to this important conversation, share it with a dude in your life who needs to talk about some stuff. In this episode Ollie teaches us all a lesson in vulnerability, and shows us it’s a superpower, not a weakness. #1in4