Podcast appearances and mentions of jody carrington

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Best podcasts about jody carrington

Latest podcast episodes about jody carrington

Mind Love • Modern Mindfulness to Think, Feel, and Live Well
The Death of Presence: Doing It All and Doomscrolling Through Life with Dr. Jody Carrington • 402

Mind Love • Modern Mindfulness to Think, Feel, and Live Well

Play Episode Listen Later May 20, 2025 67:56


In this episode, you'll learn: Why “you're not that good” might be the most freeing thing you'll hear all year How to stop performing connection and actually feel it What your nervous system, your kids, and your future self really need from you You ever feel like connection shouldn't be this hard? We're wired for it. Built to bond. Yet somehow, we live in a world where loneliness feels like a personal failure—like if you're not constantly fulfilled by your partner, your kids, your group chat, your job, something must be wrong with you. We love to look back and pretend we had it better before. When moms baked sourdough and kids played outside and families sat down for dinner without a single screen in sight. But ask your parents if they ever felt truly seen. Ask your grandparents if they ever really knew their own parents. The truth is, disconnection isn't new. We've just gotten better at distracting ourselves from it. Now we're not only lonely—we feel broken for being lonely. Like we're doing life wrong. Like we just need to try harder, be more intentional, fix ourselves. But what if the answer isn't in trying harder? What if the truth is… you're just not that good? Not in a shameful way. In a liberating way. You're not supposed to be perfect. You're not supposed to hold it all together, all the time, with no village and no margin for error. And the sooner you admit that, the sooner you get to breathe again. And by the way—that line? You're not that good? That's from today's guest, Dr. Jody Carrington. And when she said it, it hit like a truth I didn't know I was waiting for. She's a psychologist, speaker, and bestselling author who's spent decades helping people reconnect—with each other and with themselves. From psychiatric units to packed stages, her work is refreshingly raw, deeply human, and just the right amount of hilarious. Links from the episode: Show Notes: mindlove.com/402 Join the Mind Love Collective Sign up for The Morning Mind Love for short daily notes to wake up inspired Support Mind Love Sponsors Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

The Everygirl Podcast
This Episode Will Change How You Handle Stress Forever, With Dr. Jody Carrington

The Everygirl Podcast

Play Episode Listen Later Apr 22, 2025 61:42


#174: If you've been feeling overwhelmed, stuck, or disconnected lately, this one's for you. Psychologist, Speaker, and Human Connection Expert Dr. Jody Carrington is on the pod! In this radically honest and insanely empowering episode, Josie sits down with Dr. Jody Carrington to unpack why we're more disconnected (and burned out) than ever. You'll learn: Why “self-care” isn't solving your burnout—and what actually does, how to feel more connected in your relationships and your career, and Dr. Jody's no-BS advice for showing up for others without losing yourself. This is one of those listen-to-it-twice episodes that hits you right in the soul—and gives you the tools to take your power back.This episode is brought to you by AshwaMag.Get 20% off your monthly subscription to Josie's favorite mood-supporting supplements with code “EVERYGIRL20” at ashwamag.com.For Detailed Show Notes visit theeverygirlpodcast.com Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The Child Psych Podcast
How to be More Connected in a Disconnected World with Dr. Jody Carrington, Episode #127

The Child Psych Podcast

Play Episode Listen Later Apr 16, 2025 54:54


When we feel seen, we rise. In this sneak peak from our upcoming summit, Dr. Carrington explores how we are wired for connection and how the disconnection we are facing is hurting our families. She offers simple, practical steps to putting connection at the centre of our lives again. Refreshing, packed with personal stories, this is an episode you do not want to miss. Dr. Jody Carrington is a clinical psychologist, speaker, author, and game changer. As a child psychologist, she has assessed, treated, educated, and empowered some of the most vulnerable and precious souls on the planet: our kids. After 15 years, she believes to her core that the ones who hold our kids - our educators and parents - are our biggest game changers. Her mission is to shift the way educators think and feel about the hold work they do, and to refocus all of us on supporting them in that work. Her wonderful book can be found here: https://www.amazon.ca/Feeling-Seen-Reconnecting-Disconnected-World/dp/1443466921Join us for our Children's Mental Health and Parenting SummitOur Childrens Mental Health and Parenting Spring Summit is happening from April 21- 25th.18 masterclasses, plus 5 live workshops, where world renowned experts tackle incredible topics like parental anxiety, getting kids to listen, early parenting intervention, picky eating, resiliency, keeping kids safe online, healing attachment and so much more!The summit is free- and for those of you who can not attend live - recordings are available. To find out more, click here Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Trust on Purpose
Trust, Emotional Regulation and the Route to Human Connection

Trust on Purpose

Play Episode Listen Later Apr 14, 2025 40:19 Transcription Available


Send us a message - we'd love to hear from youPsychologist Dr. Jody Carrington joins us to discuss the paradoxical nature of being human: we are biologically wired for connection, yet struggle to truly see each other. Drawing from her work with first responders and children, she explains how emotional regulation builds trust and why distrust often stems from trauma rather than choice.We explore how digital connectivity, sleep deprivation, and fractured attention hijack our nervous systems, undermining our capacity for trust and empathy. Dr. Carrington offers simple yet transformative practices that serve as neurobiological interventions and suggests that humanity's purpose may be helping each other navigate life with greater calm and compassion.Listen to discover how practicing emotional regulation might be the revolution our disconnected world needs most. We want to thank the team that continues to support us in producing, editing and sharing our work. Jonah Smith for the heartfelt intro music you hear at the beginning of each podcast. We LOVE it. Hillary Rideout for writing descriptions, designing covers and helping us share our work on social media. Chad Penner for his superpower editing work to take our recordings from bumpy and glitchy to smooth and easy to listen to episodes for you to enjoy. From our hearts, we are so thankful for this team and the support they provide us.

The Interview Chair
Episode 75: Empathy is the Antidote to Burnout

The Interview Chair

Play Episode Listen Later Feb 10, 2025 33:44


In this episode, Dr. Jody Carrington reminds us that to best serve our students and families the biggest investment we can make is on ourselves first and that our job as educators and caretakers is to do the next best, right, kind thing.

The Metabolism and Menopause Podcast
Navigating Loneliness, Overwhelm and Burnout in Menopause with Dr. Jody Carrington | MMP Ep. 167

The Metabolism and Menopause Podcast

Play Episode Listen Later Feb 6, 2025 45:47


Perimenopause and the years that follow come with a LOT of change. It can leave you feeling a little bit crazy, really burnt out but also alone - like no one understands. I had the pleasure of having Dr. Jody Carrington on the podcast. We talked about SO much stuff on this podcast that will make you feel seen, heard and leave you nodding your head in agreement about some of the struggles we face as women but no one really talks about. She is the founder and principal psychologist at Carrington & Company, she's written three best-selling books, speaks on hundreds of stages globally each year, and host of the Unlonely podcast. She is a mom to three, a wife, hockey coach, a daughter, and a sister, navigating this world alongside everyone she has the privilege to learn from and serve. I hope you enjoy this podcast as much as I enjoyed interviewing her. Connect with Jody below: JODY'S INSTAGRAM https://www.instagram.com/drjodycarrington/?hl=en JODY'S WEBSITE: https://www.drjodycarrington.com/ JODY'S PODCAST: https://www.drjodycarrington.com/podcast TIMESTAMPS: (00:00) - Intro (01:05) - Who is Dr. Jody Carrington? (02:37) - Explaining dysregulation and the “flipped lid” analogy (09:50) - Moving beyond logic and actually processing emotions for true healing (16:36) - How to encourage women to embrace rest without guilt? (19:03) - How digital devices are keeping us in a state of chronic stress (25:06) - Breaking free from the pressure of traditional role expectations (34:17) - Why achieving external goals doesn't always lead to happiness (42:03) - Balancing digital use and outdoor activities in the family for better well-being (45:26) - Final words from Jody CONNECT WITH ME ONLINE: ‣ Fill out our Complimentary Health Assessment to receive customized guidelines for: - how much you should eat

Everyone Comes From Somewhere
How Do You Know When To Cut Them Loose? - Dr. Jess O'Reilly

Everyone Comes From Somewhere

Play Episode Listen Later Jan 16, 2025 57:42


Loneliness doesn't wait for an empty room—it finds us even in crowded spaces and close relationships. In this episode, Dr. Jody Carrington sits down with Dr. Jess O'Reilly, a Toronto-based sexologist (PhD), author and television personality, to explore why connection feels elusive in a hyper-connected world. From the myth of #CouplesGoals to the quiet ache of adult friendships, they dig into the layers of relationships, love, and loneliness. Jess shares why "quality over longevity" is the new mantra for relationships and how intentionality—not convenience—should guide who we let into our lives. With wisdom on everything from romantic partnerships to choosing your inner circle, this conversation is a call to reframe connection.Follow Dr. Jess O'Reilly:FacebookInstagramYouTubeWebsite Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Everyone Comes From Somewhere
What Does It Mean to Become Someone Else? – Stephen Kunken

Everyone Comes From Somewhere

Play Episode Listen Later Dec 19, 2024 56:18


Stepping into someone else's shoes can be an art form—or a lifeline. Actor and director Stephen Kunken, known for Billions and The Handmaid's Tale, takes Dr. Jody Carrington on a journey from the depths of method acting to the joys and challenges of adoption, fatherhood, and enduring relationships. Live from New York, Kunken shares insights on embodying complex characters, navigating fame, and balancing the demands of a public life with the sanctuary of family. From his Juilliard training to roles that explore humanity's darkest and brightest corners, this episode is an exploration of what it means to connect—to ourselves and each other—in a disposable world.Follow Stephen on Instagram!@bigskunks Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Happy as a Mother
255: Navigating Loneliness in Motherhood with Dr. Jody Carrington, Psychologist and Author

Happy as a Mother

Play Episode Listen Later Dec 11, 2024 56:30


Navigating isolation in motherhood isn't easy—and it can take a toll on our relationship satisfaction, happiness, and mental health.  This week on The Momwell Podcast, I'm joined by psychologist Dr. Jody Carrington, author of Feeling Unseen, to discuss what causes loneliness in motherhood and how we can communicate, create change, advocate for our needs, and stop feeling unseen and invisible. Show Notes: https://bit.ly/3VrXSne Book a free 15 minute consultation: momwell.com/booking Follow Momwell on Instagram: instagram.com/momwell  Sign up for our weekly VIP Newsletter: momwell.com/newsletter  Browse our popular guides and courses: momwell.com/shop  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

The Motherhood Podcast with Michelle Grosser
305 - The Lie of Work-Life Balance and Other Myths of Motherhood with Dr. Jody Carrington

The Motherhood Podcast with Michelle Grosser

Play Episode Listen Later Nov 29, 2024 47:17


Work-life balance: is it an actual thing, or just a myth designed to make us feel like we're failing at everything? Spoiler alert: it's probably the latter.In this episode, I sit down with Dr. Jody Carrington—psychologist, speaker, author, and the human equivalent of a warm, no-BS pep talk. Dr. Jody brings two decades of experience working with kids, families, and communities, and she's here to unpack the real reason we're all feeling stretched too thin: we're disconnected.  Dr. Jody's philosophy is simple but powerful: when we truly *see* and acknowledge each other, everything shifts. Whether it's parenting struggles, work stress, or that recurring argument about who forgot to defrost the turkey, reconnection is the key to building resilience, easing burnout, and finding a little more joy in the chaos.  Here's what we cover:  Why work-life balance is a lie and what we actually need to thrive.  How to regulate your emotions so you can respond instead of snapping at your partner (or your kids).  Practical parenting tips to strengthen your connection with your little humans.  This isn't another episode about doing *more*. It's about meaningful connection—the kind that actually makes life feel better. Connect with Dr. Carrington:InstagramDr. Carrington's WebsiteMY BURNOUT RECOVERY STORY + $10 OFF HAPPY JUICETAKE THE PERSONALITY PATTERN QUIZ!APPLY FOR 1:1 COACHING WITH MICHELLEFB COMMUNITY: The Calm Mom CollectiveJOIN ME ON INSTAGRAM:@itsmichellegrosser“I love The Calm Mom Podcast!” ← if that sounds like you, please consider rating and reviewing our show!  This helps us support more women, just like you, on their motherhood journey.  Click here, scroll to the bottom, tap to rate with five stars, and select “Write a Review.”  Then be sure to let me know what you loved most about the episode!

Everyone Comes From Somewhere
The Opposite of Addiction is Connection - Ryan Haddon

Everyone Comes From Somewhere

Play Episode Listen Later Nov 7, 2024 62:40


What if self-discovery was less about finding answers and more about asking the right questions? In this episode, Dr. Jody Carrington and Ryan Haddon dive deep into the journey of spiritual awakening, addiction recovery, and the healing power of connection. Ryan shares raw experiences of confronting identity, embracing community, and exploring therapeutic tools like hypnotherapy and meditation. They discuss the essential role of self-regulation, somatic awareness, and gratitude in creating safe, fulfilling relationships. Together, they unpack how tuning into our bodies and practicing self-care can transform our relationships, reshape family dynamics, and foster a sense of inner peace. This conversation illuminates the often nonlinear path to personal growth and the courage it takes to find harmony within.For more Ryan:https://www.ryanhaddon.com/ Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Well, hello anxiety with Dr Jodi Richardson
Why are we Struggling? A Conversation with Dr Jody Carrington

Well, hello anxiety with Dr Jodi Richardson

Play Episode Listen Later Oct 15, 2024 48:09


We were never meant to do any of this alone. And yet, alone so many are. Or more specifically, an astonishing number of people are lonely. And it's wreaking havoc on our mental and physical health.  This week's guest, Dr Jody Carrington, is passionate about human connection. She explains why connection is declining, the impacts of disconnection, what's standing in the way of connection and what we can do about it. It's one of the most powerful episodes we've shared.  www.drjodycarrington.comInstagram https://www.instagram.com/drjodycarrington/Facebook -https://www.youtube.com/c/drjodycarringtonLinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/dr-jody-carrington/?originalSubdomain=caSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Everyone Comes From Somewhere
The Roots of Bias and How to Uproot Them - Anu Gupta

Everyone Comes From Somewhere

Play Episode Listen Later Sep 26, 2024 51:18


They say old habits die hard, but some habits can—and should—be unlearned. In this episode, Dr. Jody Carrington dives into a powerful conversation with human rights lawyer and social scientist Anu Gupta, exploring the roots of bias and its profound effects on society. Gupta breaks down the five key drivers of bias—stories, policies, social contact, education, and media—while revealing how mindfulness is the secret weapon in dismantling it. Anu Gupta is an educator, lawyer, scientist, and the founder and CEO of BE MORE with Anu, an education technology benefit corporation that trains professionals across corporate, nonprofit, and government sectors to advance DEIB and wellness by breaking bias. His work has reached 300+ organizations training more than 80,000 professionals impacting over 30 million lives.Find more of Anu Gupta's work on his website:https://www.anuguptany.com/ Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Everyone Comes From Somewhere
What is The Antidote to Loneliness?

Everyone Comes From Somewhere

Play Episode Listen Later Sep 12, 2024 26:20


Season 2 of Dr. Jody Carrington's podcasting career is finally here. Welcome to Unlonely where Dr. Jody aims to address the loneliness epidemic and explore ways to reconnect with others. Loneliness is the crisis of our generation and understanding and addressing it is crucial for mental, physical, and societal health. This season will feature experts and game changers in various fields, as well as unfiltered stories of humanity. The goal is to motivate action, advocacy, and behavioral change through tangible advice and perspectives. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Everyone Comes From Somewhere
Dr. Jody Carrington is Back | Presenting Unlonely

Everyone Comes From Somewhere

Play Episode Listen Later Sep 5, 2024 0:35


Get a glimpse of what's to come on Unlonely, a show led by Dr. Jody Carrington that tackles one of the biggest issues of our time: loneliness. With a mix of expert interviews and deeply personal stories, Dr. Carrington reveals how this epidemic affects our mental, physical, and societal well-being—and why now is the time to change it.From uncovering the root causes of our disconnection to exploring what it takes to build meaningful relationships, this preview sets the stage for a show dedicated to making us feel more seen, heard, and understood. Because we were never meant to do this alone. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The Liberated Podcast
Teens And Mental Health ~ Beyond The Highlight Reel

The Liberated Podcast

Play Episode Listen Later Sep 4, 2024 30:57


It's our 50th episode!!! In this conversation we tackle teens and mental health from the lens of parenting.  It's such a big topic and we're both doing the best we can...sometimes we get it right, sometimes we don't.   We wanted to share beyond the highlight reel: The struggles and challenges What has been helpful What has not worked  How to be more compassionate towards yourself How to really listen to your kids In the words of Dr. Jody Carrington, as long as you are getting it right 30% of the time... your kids will do just fine. We also wanted to tell all the parents out there... You are doing great! The fact that you are seeking growth and self awareness is the biggest gift you can give your kids! Huge thanks to our talented Audio Engineer for the podcast Terry Robertson!! Join us for the She Is Liberated Retreat HERE Join our Sacred Collective HERE SCREENSHOT & TAG US ON SOCIAL MEDIA: Liberated Instagram        Liberated Facebook PLEASE LEAVE A REVIEW FOR US!!    

Fresh Air At Five
Back from Kayaking & Still on Vacayy

Fresh Air At Five

Play Episode Listen Later Aug 24, 2024 17:14


In this 181st episode, I share my daily reflection posted on Twitter @bryoncar, from Aug 19th-23rd, 2024 Check out the WHOLE SPOTIFY PLAYLIST I put together with all the listens mentioned below: >>> ⁠E181FreshAirAtFiveSpotifyPlaylist⁠

Real Talk
Dr. Jody Carrington: The Loneliness Epidemic

Real Talk

Play Episode Listen Later Jul 31, 2024 66:07


Natural disasters like wildfires impact us in many different ways. On top of the obvious physical devastation, communities typically experience increased rates of anxiety, depression, and PTSD. This Real Talk episode with Dr. Jody Carrington is dedicated to Jasper evacuees and the people helping them, first responders, and the countless Canadians impacted by the Jasper wildfire. Later in the show, we talk about loneliness, tech, and true connection.  3:05 | Dr. Jody Carrington has a message for Jasper evacuees, first responders, and other people affected by the wildfire. She's got advice on survivor's guilt for Real Talker Travis (33:10), who emailed talk@ryanjespersen.com. Dr. Jody's got a great perspective on how we're in the midst of a loneliness epidemic in the social media age (39:55), how algorithms harm us (46:35), monitoring screen time for individuals and families (54:00), and ADHD (59:35).  MORE FROM DR. JODY: https://www.drjodycarrington.com/ 27:50 | Jasper wildfire evacuees are still in the early stages of recovery. Our friends at Tourism Jasper have compiled some resources for those displaced, plus the many people looking for ways to help out.  DONATE DIRECTLY TO JASPER EVACUEES: https://www.jaspercommunityteamsociety.ca/ GET YOUR "To Jasper with Love" T-SHIRT: https://nationgear.ca/products/to-jasper-with-love-t-shirt TELL US WHAT YOU THINK ABOUT THIS EPISODE: talk@ryanjespersen.com  Do you know a post-secondary student in Canada who's lost a parent to cancer? They could qualify to receive financial assistance from the Real Talk Julie Rohr Scholarship. Application deadline is August 1.  APPLY FOR THE REAL TALK JULIE ROHR SCHOLARSHIP: https://ryanjespersen.com/scholarship FOLLOW US ON TIKTOK, TWITTER, & INSTAGRAM: @realtalkrj  REAL TALK MERCH: https://ryanjespersen.com/merch RECEIVE EXCLUSIVE PERKS - BECOME A REAL TALK PATRON:   / ryanjespersen   THANK YOU FOR SUPPORTING OUR SPONSORS! https://ryanjespersen.com/sponsors The views and opinions expressed in this show are those of the host and guests and do not necessarily reflect the position of Relay Communications Group Inc. or any affiliates.

Coaching the Whole Educator
Is Work-Life Balanace Unattainable Bullsh*t?

Coaching the Whole Educator

Play Episode Listen Later Jul 14, 2024 27:10


Send us a Text Message.As leaders, we are faced with problems the generations before us did not experience and we are joined again by Dr. Jody Carrington to explore the crucial role of human connection in our schools and how it impacts our educators.  They share why striving for a perfect work-life balance is a myth. ⁠In schools, we often preach the need for authentic leadership, but are we neglecting our own emotional well-being as well as our teachers? Being authentic requires emotional regulation. Dr. Jody explains how emotional regulation forms the foundation of our authenticity, which in turn shapes the relationships we build. As leaders, she emphasizes that "fixing" everything isn't always our primary role. Instead, prioritizing human connection creates a fertile ground where the real work can grow.⁠⁠Dr. Carrington equips us with practical strategies for becoming our most authentic and emotionally regulated selves. This job is about connection, not just results.⁠*FREE* Podcast PD(with topics such as Coaching Tools, Resistance to Change,  Beginning of the Year, etc.)Podcast Sponsor:Free Sibme Coaching AppLet's Stay Connected!Website | Instagram | Twitter | Linkedin | Facebook | Contact Us

Cheaper Than Therapy with Vanessa and Dené
Ep 222: Transforming Trauma with Empathy with Dr. Jody Carrington

Cheaper Than Therapy with Vanessa and Dené

Play Episode Listen Later Jun 26, 2024 54:49


In this episode of Cheaper than Therapy the Podcast, we sit down with Dr. Jody Carrington, psychologist, speaker, and three time author known for her expertise in trauma, connection, relationships, and mental health, to discuss emotional regulation, how to be emotionally available in what Dr. Jody calls a loneliness epidemic, and the transformative power of leading with kindness and compassion. What You'll Gain from this Episode:✨The importance of emotional regulation as the foundation for healthy relationships and effective leadership✨The need for more supports for first responders and the effects of organizational trauma✨ Why our society may be facing a loneliness epidemic and why professionals like teachers, therapists, and first responders need increased supports for the well-being of their communities

Fly To Freedom: Healing from an eating disorder
Episode 64 - Authentic Human Connection: Building Your Village of Support

Fly To Freedom: Healing from an eating disorder

Play Episode Listen Later Jun 11, 2024 51:16


In this week's episode of Fly to Freedom, host Julia Trehane interviews renowned psychologist and human connection expert Dr. Jody Carrington. They discuss Dr. Carrington's background and what led her to focus her career on understanding human relationships and connection. The conversation centres around eating disorders - the underlying causes, the isolation and disconnection those struggling often experience, and practical tips for beginning the recovery process.   Key Discussion Points: - The importance of understanding the story behind behaviours rather than just labelling them as problematic (9:05)  - Regulating the nervous system as a first step before addressing root causes of eating disorders (20:06) - Finding support and building a team when recovering from an eating disorder (24:33) - Reconnecting with yourself and others after isolating due to an eating disorder (30:40) - Asking for help and being vulnerable in eating disorder recovery (34:13) Guest Bio:  Dr. Jody Carrington is a psychologist, human connection expert and bestselling author based in Alberta, Canada. She has over 20 years of experience working with clients ranging from children to major institutions. Dr. Carrington is the founder of the Carrington Practice and speaks globally about relationships, connection and understanding the stories behind behaviours.   Connect with Dr Jody www.drjodycarrington.com @drjodycarrington Engage With Me I'd love to hear your thoughts and stories. Whether you're on your own journey or supporting someone through theirs, share your experiences and tips with us. Together, we can create a supportive community that celebrates each step towards recovery. Website Juliatrehane.com Email Julia@juliatrehane.com Instagram https://www.instagram.com/juliatrehane?igsh=MTZ1

Coaching the Whole Educator
#89: When "Being Nice" Can Be Harmful

Coaching the Whole Educator

Play Episode Listen Later Jun 2, 2024 22:18


Send us a Text Message.Watch the UNEDITED Youtube version too!This podcast episode confronts the epidemic of isolation plaguing educators, instructional coaches and school leaders. Dr. Jody Carrington, a child psychologist turned best-selling author and public speaker, joins me with her sass and boldness to discuss the root cause of this isolation- a system that most times prioritizes cold efficiency over human connection.Educators, wired for connection, are drowning in a sea of disconnection which has led to widespread burnout and exhaustion.The ability to manage their own emotions, Dr. Jody argues, is one of the most important skills educators and leaders can develop. Emotional regulation allows adults to better support other adults and students, as well as navigate the often-stressful educational environment.Leaders are called upon to dismantle the culture of niceness that permeates education. This culture of niceness, often characterized by toxic positivity, masks deeper issues and prevents educators from getting the support they need.The solution? Authenticity and empathy. Dr. Jody shares that leaders can begin to reverse the tide of isolation, dismantle our widespread culture of niceness and prioritize connection for all humans in the school building- big and small.Podcast Sponsor:Free Sibme Coaching AppThe Whole Educator *Free* ResourcesLet's Stay Connected!Website | Instagram | Twitter | Linkedin | Facebook | Contact Us

Cheaper Than Therapy with Vanessa and Dené
Ep 214: Episode Rewind - How Therapy Can Mirror Our Innate Goodness with Ashley Torrent

Cheaper Than Therapy with Vanessa and Dené

Play Episode Listen Later May 1, 2024 63:53


In this episode, we go into our archives and bring back one of our first episodes EVER with our good friend, Ashley Torrent. Ashley is a psycho-spritual counselor and intuitive medium, Co-Host of “The Blue Butterfly Effect” and “The Practice of Love” podcasts, and recurring guest on the “Single on Purpose” podcast. Dené and Vanessa sit down to talk with Ashley about her journey and insights into holistic therapy, and her practice of blending clinical psychology with spiritual practices to help clients navigate their emotional and spiritual well-being and challenges. Some Takeaways from this Episode:✨ The importance of being present and curious about oneself, and how that practice of mindfulness can accelerate the healing process and give you insight to a bigger purpose, providing additional emotional support in your healing journey✨ How combining empathy and intuition in therapy allows a deeper connection between therapist and client, allowing authentic connection and healing ✨ The challenges and rewards of being a therapist, particularly as an intuitive, and the delicate balance of maintaining professional boundaries with deep empathy

Cheaper Than Therapy with Vanessa and Dené
Ep 213: Liberated Love with Mark Groves

Cheaper Than Therapy with Vanessa and Dené

Play Episode Listen Later Apr 24, 2024 30:56


This episode of Cheaper than Therapy the Podcast is from an Instagram live with Vaness and Mark Groves, Human Connection Specialist and founder of Create The Love. Mark works as a bridge between the academic and the human, inviting people to explore the good, bad, downright ugly, and beautiful sides of connection. Join us as we talk emotional armor, the necessity of integrating bodywork with talk therapy, relationships as the jump off point for our deeper internal work, co-regulation and of course codependency!

Cheaper Than Therapy with Vanessa and Dené
Ep 211: How the Body Releases Trauma and Restores Goodness with Dr Peter Levine

Cheaper Than Therapy with Vanessa and Dené

Play Episode Listen Later Apr 10, 2024 66:04


In this Cheaper than Therapy episode, we sit down with Dr. Peter Levine for a deep dive into the complexity of trauma, and the transformative possibilities within therapeutic practices. Dr. Levine holds a doctorate in biophysics and a doctorate in psychology. He is the developer of Somatic Experiencing and Somatic Experiencing International, a naturalistic and neurobiological approach to healing trauma, Founder and President of the Ergos Institute for Somatic Education, dedicated to community outreach and post-advanced somatic experiencing training, and author of several best-selling books on trauma. His work has been taught to over 30,000 therapists in over 42 countries. Some Takeaways from this Episode:✨ Trauma and the Body: The importance of recognizing that trauma is not merely a brain disorder, but becomes deeply embedded in the body's responses and requires therapeutic techniques that addresses physical manifestations of trauma(s)✨Interconnectedness of Generations: How trauma is interconnected across generations and survival mechanisms passed down, recognizing that patterns and responses inherited from ancestors may not just be through behavior, but through epigenetic modifications✨ Healing in Community: The importance of community and collective healing practices when addressing trauma, and that the often isolated approach to mental health should be replaced with communal support systems and shared healing experiences

The Angry Therapist Podcast: Ten Minutes of Self-Help, Therapy in a Shotglass for fans of Joe Rogan Experience

In this exciting episode, John hosts a panel with the speakers for the upcoming In Bloom: A Love and Relationships Summit. They talk about everything love and relationships including artificial intimacy, sex as a cultural and relational issue, emotional availability, and the practice of interdependence. The conversation also touches on communication in relationships, the challenges of navigating different attachment styles, the importance of understanding and empathy in relationships, rather than labeling and blaming, and much more. In Bloom: A Love and Relationships Summit April 12-14, 2024 Fairmont Waterfront Hotel, Vancouver BC (virtual attendance is also available) Featuring Dr. Gabor Maté, Rae Maté, Logan Ury, Dené Logan, Shaun Galanos, Dr. Jess O'Reilly, Dr. Jody Carrington, John Kim, Vanessa Bennett, Todd Baratz, and Sophie Grégoire Trudeau. Take your relational skills to the next level. Real Love Ready is putting you in the room with your favourite relationship experts—and the most trusted names in love—for a weekend of learning, growth, and community. Use the discount code INBLOOM25 for 25% off in person and virtual. SIGN UP HERE

Cheaper Than Therapy with Vanessa and Dené
Ep 210: Impermanence and the Transformative Power of Love with Rainier Wylde

Cheaper Than Therapy with Vanessa and Dené

Play Episode Listen Later Apr 3, 2024 73:21


In this special Cheaper than Therapy episode, we sit down with our friend Rainier Wylde in person to talk about the often painful truth of love's impermanence and conditionality, and how love can lead to personal growth. Rainier is a highly sought after mentor and consultant to authors, athletes, business professionals, coaches, healers, and ordinary radicals who want to see change in their world. He is known for his unique blend of spirituality and in depth strategic coaching and is the author of “As You Are: Meditations on Self & Other” and the co-host of Love Like Hell podcast.Some Takeaways from this Episode:✨The Link Between Love and Loss: The importance of embracing loss as an inevitable part of all relationships and that grief and joy are intertwined✨Fantasy Love and Consequences: The misconceptions about the idea of “fantasy love” and pitfalls of chasing unconditional love in romantic relationships✨ The Evolution of Love through Life: How the progression of love, from initially meeting to the mature connection highlights how love is a dynamic force that can foster profound inner growth and self-alignment✨Parental Love and Selfhood: The complexities of parental love and the challenges of maintaining your sense of self, especially in romantic relationshipsConnect with Rainer:Podcast: Love Like HellInstagram: @rainerwyldeBook: As You Are: Meditations on Self and Other

Breakaway, The Minor Hockey Podcast
Episode 163 | How Coaches Can Create Connections With Players (Dr. Jody Carrington)

Breakaway, The Minor Hockey Podcast

Play Episode Listen Later Mar 26, 2024 72:17


Coaches can come up with all of the Xs and Os or pour over video, but a large part of what it means to be a leader on a minor hockey team is creating those valuable connections with your players. Warning: This episode contains strong language. Guest Bio: Dr. Jody Carrington is a child psychologist and published author. Learn more: https://www.omha.net/news_article/show/1304895

Cheaper Than Therapy with Vanessa and Dené
Ep 208: Embracing Change: Navigating a New Perspective on Relationships

Cheaper Than Therapy with Vanessa and Dené

Play Episode Listen Later Mar 20, 2024 27:58


This episode of Cheaper than Therapy the Podcast is part of a series where we answer questions submitted by listeners. Today, we're addressing the discomfort some listeners have talking about relationships, specifically when discussing the evolving paradigms of love and partnership and our ownership template of relationships. If you have a question for Vanessa and Dené, click here.Some Takeaways from this Episode:✨Shifting Perspective: While uncomfortable, it is important to shift your viewpoint of relationships in a way that prioritizes personal responsibility and growth over controlling others, as a way to foster more genuine connections✨ The Role of Control: Recognizing that attempting to control our environment and the people around us is actually anxiety and/or fear manifesting and the first step to breaking free from codependency✨Navigating Activation and Resistance: Remember that when feeling activated, it's an invitation to look inward and focus on Self, pushing past the discomfort ✨Empowerment through Agency: By focusing on what we can control (our actions, responses, participation, etc.) we reclaim our power and cultivate healthier, more authentic connections

Rising Strong: Mental Health & Resilience
Alannah Boyle - ADHD, Addiction, and Mental Health: Unravelling the Connection

Rising Strong: Mental Health & Resilience

Play Episode Listen Later Mar 19, 2024 36:46


In this insightful podcast episode, Alannah Boyle sheds light on the impact of ADHD and addiction on mental health. Drawing from her personal experiences and healing journey, she discusses how childhood trauma and family dynamics can shape our mental well-being. She shares her own struggles with addiction and the pivotal role youth played in inspiring her to change. Alannah emphasizes the importance of understanding these underlying factors to heal and thrive. From her work with youth, Alana highlights the power of connection in creating safe spaces for young individuals facing mental health challenges. She also delves into her work with adult women with ADHD, empowering them to embrace their unique wiring and find strategies for managing their lives effectively. Through routine, self-acceptance, and self-compassion, Alana encourages individuals with ADHD to navigate life with resilience and find their own path to success. ............................................................................ Alannah's Links: https://www.alannahboyle.com/ Instagram: @alannahboyleyqr ............................................................................ Rising Strong Links: Get new episode notifications: bit.ly/risingstrongupdates Follow us on Instagram: www.instagram.com/risingstrongpodcast Facebook page - send your reviews and comments via the 'comment' button here: www.facebook.com/risingstrongpodcast WIN SWAG: · Email a screenshot of your 5-star review for a chance to win some Rising Strong swag! Lisa@LisaKBoehm.com ........................................................................... Transcript: Lisa/Host: How do ADHD and addiction impact mental health? Alana Boyle is my guest today, and she will explain all of this and more. It's real and raw. She doesn't sugarcoat the hard stuff, but instead uses it as fuel to light the way towards the good stuff. I'm Lisa, and this is right, rising strong mental health and resilience, where I share powerful interviews to inspire you on your own path. Don't forget to follow or subscribe so you don't miss a single episode. Now, let's get started. My guest today is Alana Boyle, who has taken her own experiences and healing and now works as a certified life coach. When you hear Alana's story, you'll understand why she's so passionate about helping youth overcome trauma and build trusting relationships. Welcome to the show, Alana. Alannah : Thanks, Lisa. Lisa/Host: I love the quote. We are shaped by where we come from, meaning our past influences are present. Tell us about your journey with mental health. Alannah : I love that quote, too, Lisa, because it is something that is very important. And when I do talks on mental health, that's what I usually say is it's understanding our past and where we came from, and that's the only way we're going to heal our mental health. And so mine started when I was a little girl and my dad was not in my life and my mom drank until I was eight or nine. So unknowingly, these things impacted me. So I'm 45 right now. And so in today's world, we have a little bit more understanding how these things would cause abandonment, attachment issues, things like that. And then not until I hit university did I really start to struggle. And again, not talking about anxiety or talking things about different things, but I started drinking at that time. And so that was my way to cope. That was how I thought I could fit in. That helped with my self confidence, with that, with that transition and change from my small town in northern Saskatchewan to a university in Regina, which I felt like I felt comfortable in. But, yeah, so then the drinking started, and then there was drug use, and those things continued on and ended up losing my house and being a really bad car accident and just the things that come along with addictions, really. And then it was youth, really, that helped me change that. I was working in a facility, and I was like, if I'm going to be a role model to these people, I need to stop doing these things. And there was a fairly big incident that happened, too, as well. And then after that, I did quit drinking. I quit using. And there's been relapses since that. But it was then in the next two years, there's this thing called post of acute withdrawal symptoms and pause for short, but not many people know about it, but in the addiction world, we do. And so then in that time, there was more depression, there was more anxiety, there was more like I always tell people, I just kept hitting these brick walls. Not that I'm better than this, but I knew that I had more purpose or more potential to do things. And so one day in December 2012, I slipped on a piece of ice going to work, and I was like, I'm done. I'm done. Went to my doctor, and my doctor wanted to give me meds right away, and I'm like, what do I need meds for? Again, mental health. Not really knowing too much about it at that point, even though I worked in the industry, I was like, I'm stressed. I just can't take anymore. So I went on a leave, and that just started that search. I was going to call it a spiral, but it was more of a searching a journey. And so I was off work. And for those two weeks, then I went back. And then I agreed to the meds because my body started unwinding and I started things where I was paying attention to more things. And I had those thoughts of, like, I'd be better off dead or who would come to my funeral. All of those aspects, right? And then see my doctor. We worked through things. I ended up on accommodation at work. She encouraged me to go back. I was really reluctant, and I'm grateful that she kind of did that nudge because it's always harder to do these things the longer you wait, right? I still wasn't who I thought I was. Looking back, I really liked, I didn't mind my childhood in that sense, but I knew who more I was at that time, and I wasn't that same person anymore. And so eventually my doctor referred me to a psychiatrist, and we continued on the journey with meds and a lot of resistance and stuff from insurance companies because they're like, well, if you're depressed, then you shouldn't be doing this. And I'm like, no, I actually want to get better. I'm doing the things to get better. Thank you. And then I was diagnosed with ADHD. And it just like, I'm like, I'm myself again. I'm not hitting the walls. I'm going over bumps or having to navigate things like you do in life. But it was no longer just like banging my head against the wall or just hitting these big brick walls. And so that was kind of. In a nutshell, it's kind of my journey of finding out what was actually going on in the root of a lot of whether it was the addiction piece or even behaviors or then the mental health pieces. Lisa/Host: That's a lot. There's a couple of things that I want to unpack. One, thinking back to my university days, when did you put two and two together to realize, okay, there's university partying, right? Especially when you're moving away from home and all that. But when did you separate that in your head and think, this has gone beyond university partying? When did you recognize that maybe there was a bit more of a problem? Alannah : I didn't. That's the honest answer. I didn't. So I didn't even when. So I got my first degree. So I tell people, like, I got my first degree as an alcoholic, as an addict, and I had undiagnosed ADHD. I would drink and party the night before midterm. Because here's the thing again, I had undiagnosed. I didn't study in high school. I didn't know how. I couldn't retain things. I wasn't able to read. Well, I was able to read, but retain that information and focus. So me studying didn't mean anything to me. So I was like, oh, you want to go drink? Let's go party? Let's go. And back then, checkers was Open in Regina. So that was always a big. It was. It wasn't. And I'm from a small town, so in small towns, we glamorize the ability to drink. That that's what we. You know, all of the things. And it wasn't until I ended up moving back to Regina again. I think it was the third time I'd lived in Regina in my life that I realized it was problematic. People were talking about it. I always say people were talking about it behind me, but I don't remember a time that somebody said to me, alana, your drinking is impacting us, or it's out of control or that sort of thing. So luckily, I was able to navigate it and get out of it. But, yeah, no, in university, I was just fun and inappropriate, really. But I was a young person. Lisa/Host: It sounds to me like the ADHD diagnosis was a big, pivotal moment for you. Can you explain how that tied everything together. Alannah : In a few words? Hey. Like I said, I always felt I had this potential. I was smart enough. But like I said, I didn't study. I didn't read books. I didn't read books until I was Medicaid for ADHD. I have two degrees without reading a textbook, and my grade twelve. So having that diagnosis again, like I said before, when I was a teenager, I liked my life. I did like my life. There was like bullying and different things, but I liked my life. And once I got that diagnosis, I felt more like myself. I felt more connected, I felt more even ambitious or things like that. And so the diagnosis just helped me connect the dots again. And so many people with ADHD, often, especially in their teen years, will say they don't feel like they fit in, they don't feel like there's something missing or whatever, right? And so because of the path I took, it just answered everything in terms of both addiction. People with addiction and ADHD have low dopamine, right? So just seeking, so seeking so much stimulation in terms of fun or spontaneity or actual impulsivity. But yeah, I still struggle with finances. It's still my biggest thing to understand and comprehend. But again, these things just. And then you internalize things. So that diagnosis, actually, one of the biggest things I found, besides emotional regulation, it's helped me with, is that self esteem piece that I can be confident again. I can have these financial struggles or other struggles and still be myself and be confident. And it allowed me to be those separate pieces instead of really having that inner critic or having that negative conversation with myself all this time and having all the shame and all that lays you down. And so the ADHD diagnosis, I tell my clients most of the time, is that it did a 360 for me. And so would I have liked to have had it when I was a teenager or child, probably. But at the same time, the path I took has been able to help me help other people and to understand things a little bit better. And it never was like, I have such good support systems, my family, I never had to be on the street or different things like that. So it never went into, it was deep enough and dark enough, but it didn't ever go into those places that it would have been harder to get out of. Right? Yeah. It totally changed how I navigate my life, how I'm showing up in my life, how I even present in terms of tact and stuff and being. I'm not as sarcastic and I'm not as, like, our words hurt, right? And there's definitely times that ADHD is one of those things that we struggle to hold back. And so, yeah, definitely my words have hurt other people at times. And that was one of the, it's helped me to put that pause in to be like, should I say this? Shouldn't I say this? Right. Like just so many aspects, because I'm really curious. Lisa/Host: Was it the diagnosis itself, knowing that this is something that I have, or was it perhaps medication or a prescription that helped with some of these aspects? Alannah : It's so interesting because to me it's been both. Like, it really has. The medication has helped me. I always like people to be coachable, right? So the medication has helped me be my own coach and be able to do those things because, again, I had, because 38, when I started medication, I had 38 years of telling myself I wasn't good enough or that I wasn't lovable or all of these negative things that kept showing up. So you have to unlearn all of those things. So the thing with ADHD, just this past couple of weeks, I've learned another thing that is affected by ADHD. And it's crazy because I'm like, well, that happened to me in high school, too. It's just crazy. And so to me, it really is a combination. When I'm working with people, that's their choice. Right? Like medication can help you. I also know the negative pieces of it, but the understanding, because it is so complex and it's actually very contradictory. I think it's just really important to find that acceptance that this is how my brain works and it's going to impact me in these ways. And to me, the acceptance piece is the biggest part. The medication definitely is a piece. It's just like having a coach. It's just something that helps get over a hill or whatever. But there is so much more to ADHD than just taking medication. And that is one of the things that I think is so important for people to know. Lisa/Host: That's really great information. I appreciate you sharing that. Let's circle back a little bit to the topic of mental health. That's a big umbrella. But in your opinion, how do you think addictions and ADHD affect mental health? Alannah : There's so many stigmas around both of them. In all of them, like mental health, addictions, ADHD, all of the things. And then I think that's where we, for whatever reason, as humans, we get stuck in those stereotypes or those stigmas or whatever about things, right? And so I think it's just really important. And I know that's why there's a big fear about people who have ADHD taking medications. They think they're going to be addicted, and it's actually the opposite. Right. You're less likely to have addiction issues if you're medicated and properly managing ADHD. So I think it's, um. I'm trying to remember your questions. Here's my ADHD popping. It's just they all impact each other. And if we're not. So Gabor mate is an amazing canadian doctor. I'm not even sure what his actual credentials are, but he's just amazing. And it comes back to not why the addiction, but why the pain, right? And so if we look at mental health, and if we look at addiction, ADHD, all of the things, if we look at all of these things that are impacting, then we can help create a healthier mental health. And lots of people don't understand if we're not managing or treating ADHD, we end up with a lot of physical health symptoms, right? So many people, especially women untreated, end up with things like fibromyalgia or like rheumatoid arthritis. There's so many things because of the stress that is caused by ADHD. And so, again, if we can find those ways to understand the mental health pieces. So, like, okay, so my dad wasn't in my life. How is that affecting me? And during my journey, I actually went to a psychologist. He's like, you're good. And I'm like, can I talk? When I was trying to quit drinking? And he's like, you're good. And I'm like, I'd actually like to talk about my dad is. I'm sure I've got issues. And he's like, no. He's like, if you relapse, you can come back. And I was like, what? Again, it's having the supports, it's having the people, it's having the recognition that, hey, this might have impacted me. Maybe it didn't impact somebody else, but it might have impacted me because that's how trauma works. It's so different. We're individual people and so we have to look at it that way, right? And so, for the most part, again, using my dad as an example, it didn't impact me because my mom parented it in a way that this was normal. So he wasn't in and out of my life. There wasn't even conversations about that. It wasn't until I got older and I was like, oh, I was technically supposed to have a dad kind of thing, right? And of course, it's likely impacted relationships, but it hasn't necessarily impacted who I am. And it doesn't make me depressed because I didn't have one. It doesn't make me lonesome because I didn't have one. Right. But it could be for somebody else. And it's just, again, hearing those stories and understanding that. So again, and I'm going on and on. But that's where I think it's really important when we go see a counselor, a therapist, a coach, or whomever, that we give that big picture. That's why we ask. That's why there is those initial intake kind of appointments, and we get all that information and so that we can understand what's kind of all going on or what's all transpiring, so that we can help have that person be whole and be there to support them and guide them through whatever they need to be guided through. Lisa/Host: Absolutely. Even, I mean, you are the expert in ADHD, and that's actually something that I don't know a lot about. So I'm really grateful that you're sharing this information, but what I'm hearing from you, and correlates to my way of thinking as well, is that we are like Shrek says, we are like an onion, right? We've got so many layers, and there are so many aspects to our well being, even just the mental, spiritual, physical, blah, blah, blah. But everything affects everything else. You're absolutely right. I think mental health affects our physical well being, our spiritual well being. And even when we start taking care of parts that maybe aren't directly in line with our mental health, it does help our mental health. Even with my background in grief, I have this picture in my head of like a pie, if you will, and that every aspect that we work on helps us in our grief journey. That's really interesting that you said it. I think very much the same, but in a different way. Alannah : And that's where I really like the medicine wheel. When you look at indigenous cultures, right? If we're not filling each aspect of those things, the wheel goes like. It doesn't flow. There's been. And so that's the thing. If we're depleted in those areas or we're not filling those areas where there's going to be some aspect of our human piece that isn't going to function properly, and it's hard to make. This is a very complex machine that we're trying to drive. Right? Lisa/Host: 100% agree. Tell us a little bit about the work that you do with youth. Alannah : Well, I actually really love the youth. They're fun little creatures. And so I currently have a contract with one of the first nation communities just near Regina, and I work with youth in their school I have worked with youth for probably since I've been out of university, and so they've always been my go to in the city here. I work more with adults, and that's just who I'm attracting into my space. So I am really fortunate that I do have this contract with them. And so we get to spend time, like, in a one to one kind of counseling session and work through whatever they're going through. And it's so important for me for youth to know that there's people out there that care about them, that will show up into their space, that build that relationship and build that rapport, that they can feel safe with other people. Because we all know as youth, there's so many things going on for them these days, right? And so that's my favorite aspect. And then creating, like, we just talked about whether it's a spiritual or emotional or physical need, right? And that was a lot of my work in the city here when I was working for an organization was like, okay, so you don't get to practice this skill. Let's go do that. Right? So whether we were going for lunch and they had to actually order their own lunch, we'll do it, because you know what? These life skills are things that you're never going to eat food because you can't order it. Some of us take going to a restaurant for granted, but this was a real thing, or, like, asking for a box to get or paying for something, all of these things. And so it was like, those opportunities are still my favorite pieces of being able to work with youth or showing up, like, if they're playing basketball, showing up and cheering them on or doing those things. So I have a kinesiology degree as well. And so that was the thing that I did as a rec coordinator for a community school. And so that was what we did. We did fun things and created those relationships. And so that's one of the things that I think I'm really good at, is really just creating that structure in that relationship and that rapport so that they know, like, hey, you can come to me. And I really just believe in showing up. So, yeah, maybe I'm your counselor, maybe I'm your coach or whatever, but I'm going to show up in the gym and play volleyball with you. Or, I had a kid a couple of weeks ago be like, hey, Alana, you want to play table tennis? He called it ping pong. But where I'm from, it's like, a kid has to be table tennis. And so we did that, and you know what? They don't even know. I felt so good that he asked me to do that, but they don't even know how therapeutic that is for them. And that's the best thing. But the fact that he could be like, hey, what are you doing? I'd like to beat you. Like, a little bit of competition, but just creating those relationships so that they know, because it is uncomfortable to talk to people about your feelings or in general, as kids, we feel like we're talking bad about our parents or whatever, but having those moments that we can do those things. Yeah, that's my favorite part with working with youth, is just, they help light me up as much as I'm helping them along in their journey. Lisa/Host: That's the beauty, I think, with connection. And as you were talking there, my brain was kind of cycling back to my conversation with Dr. Jody Carrington and her underlying message about just the power of connection between human, you know, in your situation, how to make a youth feel seen, heard, and validated. And I think that spreads into all areas of our lives. We all need that, no matter what our backgrounds, no matter what our trauma, no matter what anything. Even as adults, as somebody who's almost 55 years old, we need to still be seen, heard, and validated. So I think that is such a gift that you're offering these kids. Alannah : Well, and I find it healing. Right. It is so healing to have that connection and to create those opportunities. I think Covid was a wake up call in a lot of ways, but in the sense of now, people are slowly finding their way back to that connection. And I spoke with somebody this morning. They were talking about how difficult it was to find a counselor or whatever, but it was even more difficult to find somebody in person. Right? And so just that. And as much as I love keeping my energy safe, the in person stuff is so much better. Right? And so that's the thing. It's interesting, right? And being able to connect just on a deeper, different level. Lisa/Host: 100%. Now, let's switch gears a little bit and talk about the work that you do with adult women. And I know you work with men somewhat, too, but women with ADHD tell us about. Alannah : Have a. I have a workshop that I created, and it's crazy how even just over the last few years, there's just been more research that come out. So it went from a six week program. I had a few people say, hey, alana, why don't you do it one day? And I'm like, because it's a lot of information. But, you know, what people showed up for it because that's what they, what they could give a day. Six weeks was hard, but I just revamped it just not too long ago. And because there's just so much more information on women. So I do individual work with women. And then, like I said, I have this workshop again, going back to what I talked about with myself, like finding that acceptance. These women, especially in that group setting, get to know that they're not alone like that. These struggles are struggles of other women. I just love hearing that they learn that they're not alone in this and just learning from each other. I'm there basically as a lead or almost like a consultant, like, here we go, like a know. And they get to know, oh, Sally said this and Jean said this. And now I get to, I can try know at home because as much as I know a ton about ADHD, I don't know how people's lives run, right? So for, like, I help myself by, I always have tech issues. So typically I either give myself a lot of time because I know I'm going to get frustrated. I need to find a way to regulate and be patient, or I get somebody else to do things for me. And so that's the thing. It's like knowing that it's okay to do these things because lots of women with ADHD have that perfectionism. So then it's ingrained that they have to do it. So working with these women, they get to learn that there's nothing wrong with them, that their brain is just wired differently. And we can still live and have productive lives and we can work through the challenges, whether it's emotional dysregulation or whether it's like our executive functioning or whatever it is, our relationships, all those things. And so that we can find that productivity that we love and find the dopamine and the stimulation all those things and decrease the burnout and the stress that ADHD tends to have. And so working with these women, it's always empowering, it always is interesting. But ADHD, not that it's always changing, but there's always more information coming out, especially more research being done on how it's impacting women. Right? Yeah. I love that they show up for themselves. I love that they are taking that time to learn, right? Taking that time, because I think that's the biggest thing. It's just learning about that and then it's genetic. And so you can get that mum factor in there and be like, well, if you learn about it for yourself, then you'll be able to pair. Right. And so it's great to work with these women. Lisa/Host: The burnout, I did not know that. But now that you've said that, it makes a lot of sense. And what I'm hearing from you is that not only are you sharing your experience, teaching, facilitating, but I would say that you are empowering these women to make life changes, to make maybe not even changes, but adaptations. Alannah : Right. Lisa/Host: Working with their ADHD, not against it. You're helping them grow. You're giving them the tools to adapt to a life with ADHD. So not changing their lives, but learning to live with the ADHD. I would say that you're also teaching them to be resilient. Alannah : Do you consider yourself resilient? Yeah, I don't know if it's an ADHD thing, but I'm definitely resilient. And so you know what? Again, like you said, there's so many pieces of ADHD that are just like the research I was telling you about earlier. It's actually talking about hypermobility. And there's another term, but there's so many pieces to it that we don't even know. And so we're just learning. And so it is helping them. And my thing is, this is why I like working with youth, is prevention is super important to me. So if we're looking at prevention, like, say, even of addictions, well, then if we know that addictions and ADHD are comorbid, so, meaning that they go hand in hand, then why are we not looking after our youth and assessing them or treating them or looking at these things, right? And so, same for women. If we can prevent them from having something like fibromyalgia or another car accident or falling down the stairs or whatever it may be, then why aren't we doing that? And so that really is a lot of the basis of my work and why I enjoy doing these groups, because I want them to have as much information as possible so that they can, again, like you said, they can create better lives for themselves by knowing that, hey, if I'm doing too much, then I might burn out and I need to cut back at work. There's so many different things. And people look at. There's so many people out there saying, like, ADHD is my superpower, okay? ADHD can be very. We can get a lot of things done because we have ADHD, but if we're utilizing it as a superpower, this is kind of my belief, or how I've been looking at it lately, is that we are leading ourselves to that burnout. So again, if we're like all out on all of our cylinders, we're not going to be able to sustain that. So I'm not going to be able to be, if I go to twelve events and I'm away from home and I'm doing whatever it is and I return home, I'm going to be flat out on the couch, right? I'm not going to be able to. So again, it's like finding those ways and those pieces that help us sustain and be good parents or wives or partners or humans or whatever it is, right? And navigating all of that and being okay with communication is very difficult for people with ADHD and expressing ourselves and all of that stuff. And so going like, hey, giving ourselves that break, like, okay, I didn't say that the way I needed to say that. And so you can kind of bring yourself back to going, oh, wait a minute, I need to say that differently, right? Because I just caught myself in how I was projected because I wasn't recognizing how I feel. And so it's a lot of work, but at the same time there's so much benefit. Lisa/Host: What would be your top two tools that you've learned over the years? Alannah : I think routine is one of them. I think whether it's a sleep routine or a morning routine or just an everyday routine, like whatever it is, having some sort of structure and routine and then again giving myself that grace and acceptance that, you know, what if I blow up, okay, well, I missed a queue and I can go back and I can learn. It's just again, creating room that I'm going to screw up, right? Instead of being that somebody's going to like I'm going to be in trouble again kind of thing, but creating room and being acceptant of that. There's so many takeaways over the years and some of it is just like, again, that education and knowing that, you know what, people with ADHD are more likely to get into a car accident. Okay, so I can be more aware that, you know what you need to be more. Or making sure I'm sleeping really well. There's so many little pieces because of my kind degree too. I know how our body works a little bit more. And so even just like, hey, what else does my body need? And I'm not 100% all the time and it's not always good, but I'm aware of it and I'm accepting of I'm still going to drink Pepsi every day even though I know that it's not good for me. Right? It's just finding those pieces. It's like, what am I? Wow, this is a long answer for this question. What am I willing to accept and what am I not? Right? Yeah. Lisa/Host: So really, what I took away from that, I love the routine. I think we can all benefit from routine and giving ourselves grace. And I'm just going to change what you said a little bit, I think. Give yourself grace as a human. Alannah : Yeah. Lisa/Host: We're all human. None of us are going to be perfect. None of our days are going to be perfect. We're going to say things. We're going to do things with regret. We're going to need to go back and apologize because we're human. So maybe we can take some of those labels away, too, and just say I'm. And that's okay. Alannah : And you know what? I like that you said that, because that's one of the biggest things for me, is like, yes, I have ADHD, but at the end of the day, I'm a la. I have an addiction, all of those things. I have this history, but at the end of the day, I'm a laugh. And so that is something that is super important to me. The ADHD is an understanding. It's not who I am. Right. And so I'm really glad you said that because that is something that's super important to me. I look at these things for understanding so that we can unravel some things, but it's not who you are. Lisa/Host: Exactly. It's like me saying I have irritable bowel syndrome. I have know another thing that has letters. Alannah : Right. Lisa/Host: It's part of something I deal with, but it's not me. I'm Lisa. You're Alana. So I love that. So let's talk about where people can find you on social media, your website, and all of that good stuff. Alannah : Well, you know what? We kind of make that simple around here because it's just my name. It's Alana Boyle. Like, Alana is hard to spell, but it really is. It's alanaboil.com. That is my website. So A-L-A-N-N-A-H-B-O-Y-L-E was in Ireland this summer, and they're like, dear, you do not need to spell your last name here. And I was like, oh, okay, that's fun. And so then my instagram is Alan of oil, YQR. So, yeah, it's pretty easy to find me if you can spell my. So. Lisa/Host: Absolutely. And I will link up those links in the show notes as well. So folks are listening, and you're not sure how to spell it, you can check it out in the show notes. Alana, it has been so awesome to have this conversation. I have learned so much from you today, really and truly. So thank you so much for being here again. Alannah : I appreciate you asking me to be here. It's always my pleasure. Lisa/Host: Awesome. Well, to my listeners, stay well, be resilient, and we'll catch you next time.

The KICK-ASS Stepmom Podcast
218: Loyalty Binds, Co-Parenting Mistakes + Reconnection with Dr. Jody Carrington

The KICK-ASS Stepmom Podcast

Play Episode Listen Later Mar 18, 2024 58:07


In this week's episode of the KICK-ASS Stepmom podcast, Jamie interviews renowned psychologist Dr. Jody Carrington. Jody has a no-nonsense and candid approach backed by her clinical knowledge, it's that combination that makes her one of our favourite guests.   Join them for an unfiltered conversation on -   Life in your 40's Parenting and anxiety in the digital age The power of reconnection Loyalty binds and what's really going on for our kids in transitions How we can use acknowledgement and reconnection to improve the mom stepmom relationship   For more from Jamie Scrimgeour visit www.jamiescrimgeour.com Follow along on Instagram: www.instagram.com/jamiescrimgeour Follow along on Facebook: www.facebook.com/scrimgeourjamie   Join The KICK-ASS Stepmom Community: www.jamiescrimgeour.com/membership Download The Secret To Improving Your Stepfamily Life: www.jamiescrimgeour.com/freeguide     For More From Dr. Jody Carrington: Follow them on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/drjodycarrington Check out their website:https://www.drjodycarrington.com/ Listen to their podcast: https://www.drjodycarrington.com/podcast/   Thanks to Our Sponsors: Attend The Masterclass With The High Conflict Ex www.jamiescrimgeour.com/highconflictmasterclass   Cozy Earth - cozyearth.com/COZYJAMIE40 and use the code COZYJAMIE40 for 40% off   LMNT - My Go To Electrolyte Drink - www.drinklmnt.com/kickassstepmom to get a free sample pack with purchase

The Papaya Podcast
The One About Vulnerability, True Boundaries, The Power Of Joy and Why You Can't Be Happy All The Time with Dr. Jody Carrington

The Papaya Podcast

Play Episode Listen Later Mar 11, 2024 52:39


Have you ever felt that others just knew how to lead, how to navigate social media, have more emotional regulation or just pretty much having it together? Today we sit down with clinical psychologist, Dr Jody Carrington about exactly this: emotional regulation and learning when you don't have the script yet. We talk about happiness, and the fact that NO ONE is happy ALL the time, but we can be vulnerable with our joy. Check out www.drjodycarrington.com or @DrJodyCarrington on socials. Check out her books “Feeling Seen”, “Kids These Days” and “Teachers These Days”See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

HOT FLASHES & COOL TOPICS
Dr. Jody Carrington Shares Ways to Feel Seen and Heard in a Disconnected World

HOT FLASHES & COOL TOPICS

Play Episode Listen Later Feb 7, 2024 37:16


Do you feel disconnected to a lot that is happening in the world?  Loneliness and isolation can affect not only our mental health but may also have a negative effect on our physical wellbeing. Dr. Jody Carrington is a psychologist and author of Feeling Seen- Reconnecting in a Disconnected World. Dr. Carrington shares how we got here and ways in which we can reconnect. What is the next, best, right thing to do?  Let's talk about it. Show Notes: www.hotflashescooltopics.com FOLLOW US ON: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/hotflashesandcooltopics/ Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC6ssWfO0qeZYEIs6TzrKBHQ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/groups/657557054765087   Want to Leave a Review for Hot Flashes and Cool Topics? Here's How: For Apple Podcasts on an iPhone or iOS device: Open the Apple Podcast App on your device. Click on the “search” icon Type into the search bar “Hot Flashes and Cool Topics” and click on the show Towards the bottom, look for “Ratings and Reviews” Click on “Write a Review” and leave us your thoughts and comments! For Apple Podcasts on a computer: On the Apple Podcasts website, go to the search bar and type “Hot Flashes and Cool Topics” After clicking on the show, find the “Listen on Apple Podcasts” button and click on it The “Hot Flashes and Cool Topics” podcast should open on the Apple Podcasts application Keep scrolling on the page until you see “Ratings and Reviews” Click on “See All” If you want to give us a five-star rating, hover over the empty stars! If you want to leave your thoughts and comments, click on “Write a Review”!

#RaisingAthletes Podcast
Episode 91: Dr Jody Carrington "Roadmap for Coaches, Parents & Athletes Mental Health"

#RaisingAthletes Podcast

Play Episode Listen Later Feb 5, 2024 55:15


Renowned Psychologist. Human Connection Expert. Bestselling Author Kirsten has a blast talking to Dr. Jody this week. If you are some of our Canadian listeners, you will hear a kindred spirit! If not, you will come away as a new fan. She teaches us such important lessons with humor and energy that you will hear Kirsten laughing and learning along. Dr. Jody Carrington is a powerhouse speaker and fearless champion for authentic human connection. She is highly sought after for her expertise, energy, and genuine approach to helping people solve the most complex human-centered problems. Jody's work focuses on the value of reconnection—the key to healthy relationships and productive teams. Her authentic, honest (and often hilarious) approach never fails to inspire and motivate audiences. Dr. Carrington is the founder and principal psychologist at The Carrington Practice, where she uses her twenty-plus years of experience to empower the clients she connects with. Jody's unique resume of clients—from kids to major institutions—provides her with insights and depth of experience to present unmatched value to her audiences. Her core message resonates with everyone from the practice to the world stage: our power lies in our ability to acknowledge each other first. She is the bestselling author of Kids These Days (2019), Teachers These Days (2021), and the emotionally charged and introspective chart topping, Feeling Seen (Harper Collins, 2023). Jody lives in small-town Olds, Alberta, with her husband and three children (she had three kids in 2 years to test her own resilience), and leads the amazing team at Carrington & Company. --- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/kirsten-jones0/support

#RaisingAthletes Podcast
Episode 91: Dr Jody Carrington (CLIP) "Roadmap for Coaches, Parents & Athletes Mental Health"

#RaisingAthletes Podcast

Play Episode Listen Later Feb 2, 2024 2:25


Our guest this week Dr. Jody Carrington, Child Psychologist, is a powerhouse speaker and fearless champion for authentic human connection. In this clip, Kirsten and Dr. Jody speak to the importance of coaching tools for us and our "babies" and how connection matters so much for performance. "Just because you can bounce a ball, doesn't mean you can tell other people how to do it" Home - Dr. Jody Carrington (drjodycarrington.com) @drjodycarrington --- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/kirsten-jones0/support

Rising Strong: Mental Health & Resilience
Dr. jody Carrington - The Impact of Disconnection on Mental Health

Rising Strong: Mental Health & Resilience

Play Episode Listen Later Jan 30, 2024 44:45


The rise of disconnection in society has led to a mental health crisis, with increasing rates of loneliness, domestic violence, and mental health. Dr. Jody Carrington, a top psychologist, highlights the impact of social media and technology on our ability to maintain meaningful connections. The solution lies in fostering resilience through agency and gratitude, and actively choosing to prioritize human connection in our lives. ................................................................... Find all of Dr. Jody Carrington's books, podcast info and speaking page here: www.drjodycarrington.com Instagram - www.instagram.com/drjodycarrington ................................................................... *** LINKS associated with the Rising Strong: Mental Health & Resilience podcast: Get new episode notifications: bit.ly/risingstrongupdates FREE Resource: Create More ME TIME: bit.ly/metimeresource Follow us on Instagram: www.instagram.com/risingstrongpodcast Facebook page - send your reviews and comments via the 'comment' button here: www.facebook.com/risingstrongpodcast WIN SWAG: · Email a screenshot of your 5-star review for a chance to win some Rising Strong swag! Lisa@LisaKBoehm.com ***Remember to follow and subscribe so you never miss an episode*** .................................................................. TRANSCRIPT: Host/Lisa: Have you wondered how we ended up in this mess, how we are experiencing this mental health crisis? Well, that's exactly what I'll be talking about today with my guest, Dr. Jody Carrington. Welcome to the Rising Strong podcast. I'm your host, Lisa Baim, and I'm so excited to dive into this topic. So let's get started. Dr. Jody: You. Host/Lisa: In May of 2023, I was invited to be a part of a panel discussion at a stronger together event in Regina. And as a bonus, I got to meet the amazing keynote speaker, Dr. Jody Carrington. If you don't know her, buckle up because you are about to be inspired. In short, Jodie is one of North America's top psychologists, is an author, speaker, podcaster, but above all, she is a woman on a mission to reconnect a disconnected world. Welcome to the podcast, Jodi. Dr. Jody: Lisa, I want to take you on the road with me. That is like the best introduction of all time. Host/Lisa: I don't know about that, but I am with you. I'll go on the road with you for sure. Dr. Jody: Oh my gosh. I'm so like, after we met, I've thought about you so much and I know your work has inspired so many people, so I cannot wait to jump in. Host/Lisa: In your book, feeling seen, you indicate that we are more disconnected now than ever. Do you think this is the root of our mental health crisis right now? Dr. Jody: Yeah, 100% without question. I often think about this even as parents. We are the first generation of parents that have had so much inundation by social media. So we talk about the worries for our kids and all of those kind of things. But we are the first generation of parents that have been just so overwhelmed. And the data is interesting to me. Our great grandparents, it is estimated, looked at their children 72% more of the time than we look at our babies. And not because we don't love them less or more or any of those kind of things. We've never had this many exit ramps. And what I think is remarkable in this human race, like, whoever made this human race, like, whatever, you believe that to be true, sort of came up with two rules which said, I'm going to make two things happen. You're going to be neurobiologically wired for connection, right? You disconnect from an infant, they die. We're neurobiologically wired for connection. But the other thing I'm going to do, I'm going to throw in this second rule, which is the hardest thing you will ever do, is look into the eyes of the people you love. Okay? So go ahead. Go. And in the olden days, if you will, we had so many more opportunities to look at each other, to do that hard thing that was always hard. We lived in smaller houses, we slept in smaller beds. We didn't have computers and phones and all those things. And so this thing that has always been hard to do, to maintain connection and relationship with each other, has been given so many opportunities to just make that easier not to do it. So I think one of the biggest issues we're facing, a loneliness epidemic. We're in the middle of a mental health crisis. And I mean, keep in mind, I mean, you and I are both in Canada, relatively well resourced and safe, and all of those things. We are killing ourselves at faster rates now than ever in the history of the free world. Domestic violence, child maltreatment, those numbers have never been this high. So it begs the question why? And I really think it comes back to this idea that we were never meant to do any of this alone, and we've never felt so alone. Host/Lisa: Do you think social media plays a role in this? As you said, our phones, our devices, our computers, we're at everybody's beck and call 24/7 it seems. Dr. Jody: Oh, my gosh. And have so much access to everything. I don't think social media plays a role in it. Well, actually, I do. The way that we use social media plays the role. And I think we often sort of vilify social media. I mean, the intention of technological developments in any generation is to make the world a better, safer, more efficient place because of technological advances, I hope that our cars are safer to drive. I hope that pancreatic cancer isn't a death sentence in my lifetime because of technological advances, the issue remains how we use it. And if the problem, if one of the hardest things we will do is look into the eyes of the people we love, and this is one opportunity to make that easier, to sort of stay disconnected and safe, away from the criticisms or the learnings of other people, we're going to take that. And I don't think that was ever the intention of social media. I think that though the outcome is now our responsibility to figure out, like, holy wow, in a very short period of time, this has become dangerous, and what do we do about that? What do we have control over? And so we can say all the time, this is the government's issue, or that's the problem. But really, at the end of the day, all we have is you and me just trying to figure out exactly how we get ourselves in much more regulated states so we can continue to stay connected to the people we love. Absolutely. Host/Lisa: So the question begs to be asked, how do we do that? Dr. Jody: Well, I think, first of all, we always want to fix it so much faster, right? I think you can't address what you won't acknowledge. I think the cornerstones of mental health are two things. And I was listening to a podcast from Paul on Andrew Huberman the other day with Paul Conti, Dr. Paul Conti, and he said the two cornerstones of mental health are this agency and gratitude. And even in the shittiest of storms, being able to understand what we have control over, what is our agency becomes very internally focused. And so I feel like this is a bit of a sequential process. Agency and then gratitude, and then it goes on a loop. Okay? And so agency is like, we can get out of our heads and think, like, what about why? Oh, my God, this is so overwhelming. What do I have control over in this moment as I'm stepping into the holidays? Do I have control over my mother in law? How do I respond to this? What do I do for my babies when they're really struggling? Whatever. What do I have control over? Becomes the most important question. And then how you switch to then this external focus of the best parts of you really live in this space of gratitude. And gratitude has sort of got this overused wrap, I think, these days. But it becomes still the most important thing that we can do, I think, is to sort of, like, even when I get overwhelmed and I think about all the things that I don't have or couldn't do or I'm missing out on or I've lost being able to step into that sense of, like, okay, in this moment, what do I have allows you to get back to the best parts of yourself and from that place, making decisions about whether you charge your phone by your bed or you leave it in the kitchen, whether you choose to go for coffee with somebody or wave at your neighbor or do all of those things that require you to be physically present in your day and will make for stronger families and communities, becomes much more accessible. Does that make sense? Host/Lisa: It absolutely does. I'm wondering, have we lost the skill of being social thanks to the pandemic and a variety of other things? Dr. Jody: Yeah. So I think, to your point, it is a skill, and just like any other skill, like your golf swing or whatever that looks like, you got to practice it. And the less opportunities we have to practice it, taking our kids to the grocery store, getting together as a group of people, I think the pandemic expedited that process, that disconnect in so many ways. Here's the thing that I think also contributed to it. Right. We're the first generation of parents that have had this much access to social media. We used to love on the weekends to get together with our friends or come home at the end of the day and sink into our family because we'd worked apart or separate from or outside in the fields, or we were alone in our kitchens or whatever that looks like. And in two generations, we're so inundated by data, at the end of the day, we don't even want to talk to each other. The last person I want to talk to is my personal husband at the end of the day, because we're probably going to have to talk about something dumb that I'm going to have to do, and I'm not interested in it. And I feel like, you know what I just want to do? I want to just launder money in the Ozarks. I want to just disconnect from the world. Right? Host/Lisa: If you're loving the show, I want to hear your feedback. Take a screenshot showing your five star rating and that you're subscribed to us on Apple Podcast or are following us on Spotify. Then head over to the rising strong podcast Facebook page, hit the message button and send it my way. You'll be entered to win some rising strong swag. I will draw one name at the end of each month. Good luck, and thanks for listening. Dr. Jody: You. Host/Lisa: As you're speaking, I just thought, you know, I don't know if I consider myself an introverted extrovert or an extroverted introvert, but I am very comfortable in my own skin being on my own. But I feel that over the last three years, I want to hibernate in my house almost all the time. And I've recognized that is actually getting worse. And I'm wondering if that's just me or if that is something that we're seeing across the board. Dr. Jody: I don't think that's just you. I think everybody feels like that. And then it begs the question, like, why and where do we then get refueled? Because you can't automate relationship, right? And the more I think you've experienced in your life, where life has become difficult for whatever reason, the energy it takes to just even connect with the world becomes more compromised. But oftentimes, what happens is the more we struggle or the more we've experienced trauma or disconnect, we actually need healthy relationships and other people to help us navigate those things. We were never meant to do any of this alone. Host/Lisa: And yet I feel that sometimes it's instinct to pull within. Dr. Jody: Oh, yeah. This is not to say, right, that there isn't for sure, solitude, reflection, spending some time to do those things, that has always been necessary, right? Like the exact opposite can be true. Like you just fill yourself so much with busyness and people and substances and whatever that is to try to avoid the feelings. It's like. I think the question is, what are you doing in those times of solitude, right? Is the intention to just refuel your soul so that you can engage with the people that you love and you lead and you laugh with? Or is it a complete and utter desire to avoid everything and everybody? And I think understanding the intention behind those two things really, then direct. Whether it's good for our soul or it might just be survival, right? Host/Lisa: Why are our youth struggling so much right now? Dr. Jody: I say this all the time. I've assessed and treated over 1000 kids in our country and I've never met a bad one. Kids these days are as resilient and brilliant and probably even more inclusive and desire connection more than probably any generation that's come before them. The issue, I think, is the job of kids as they grow, are to make mistakes and be ********. And that's the only way you learn how to not. And I think when we are overwhelmed and lose our ability to just sink into the people around us and navigate big hard conversations because we don't have the time or the space to do that, the generation that's going to suffer most are the people with the less prefrontal cortexes, do you know what I mean? The ones who need people to be present. And if we've never not been this present or this distracted or this disconnected, then the issue is the people who suffer the most. And we've seen this in the post Covid data, that sort of age range of 17 to 23 struggle so much because we've missed just the noticing, right? The going out to the grocery store, the family trips, attending the funerals as a family, attending the weddings as a family. That's where you learn the ****. That's where you watch other people, right? We've talked a little bit about this, and I know just from the perspective of grief and mourning, you're born with the ability to grieve. If you're old enough to love, you're old enough to grieve. But nobody teaches us how to mourn unless you watch other people do it. Right. The more disconnected we are, the harder it is for our babies or the next generation or even grandpas to understand how do we do it these days? Right? And is it okay if we say her name? Is it okay if we all get together? Yes. ****. Coming. Come on. And if I stay away, if I want to avoid that, which is typically what we want to do when we're in pain, we avoid things. Right? We shut in on ourselves. And that initial instinct is so normal and natural and even necessary. The issue is, then, what do we do next? And before, I would say we had to gather because I couldn't phone you to talk about some things, or I couldn't just text you or email you. I actually had to physically come to your house and be like, okay, what's the plan? Or, what do you need? Or, what are we doing next? And I wanted to because I didn't have any other way to connect to you. But now we assume in so many ways that just because I've sent you a heart emoji or we've talked about it, it doesn't replace the fact that I would just show up on an anniversary or a birthday or whatever. Not only doesn't it land the same, there is a completely different physiological experience in your body when I just send you a note versus whether I show up with a coffee. Host/Lisa: Absolutely. I'm seeing this in my son as well. He's 23 now. He was very fortunate that he had a job that he worked right through. Covid. I asked him last time he was home, I said, what are your thoughts on the pandemic and mental health? And he looked at me and he says, you know what, mom? He goes, I know I was very lucky. I kind of had a normal life, just in the sense that he had a very small group that he would interact with and then his work. I also observe this generation, and I am guilty, too. Like you say, when was the last time I even phoned? Someone talked on the phone. I will choose texting or emailing first, hands down, all the time. And when my phone rings, even I go, okay, I'll answer that one. Dr. Jody: Right? Host/Lisa: Yeah. Dr. Jody: And we get the opportunity to decide if I just think about in my generation, or, this isn't like the good old days. This is like you and me when the phone rang at our house. I don't remember as a child ever sort of making a decision or anybody ever being like, don't get it. Don't answer that one, because we don't know who it is. Right? Like, before caller id. You were curious. You were like, obviously somebody needs to. But now it's all like, don't do it. I can decide, I don't want to talk to this guy right now, or I don't want to, whatever, right? So that agency or that ability to make those calls, I think, further perpetuate that allowance, for sure. Host/Lisa: So one of the things that I love to talk about on this podcast is the whole idea of resilience. Do you think that connection helps us become more resilient? Dr. Jody: Oh, yeah. Here's the thing. I think resiliency is such an individual experience and our context, the stories in which we come or walk through this world with dictate so much of our ability to sort of decide how the world operates, how people operate within the world. And I think that most of the time, none of us were meant to do any of this alone. And oftentimes when we get in our own head, we tell stories about why we showed up or why this happened to us or why this person responded in this way. And typically speaking, if we don't have anywhere to check that every once in a while, those assumptions, if we don't have anywhere to put those things, every once in a while, they become problematic. Because we tend to be our own worst critics. We tend to be our own worst enemies. We tend to get stuck in stories where, like, this is how the people, obviously she doesn't like me, or obviously this is, I'm a ****** mom, or my mother in law has told me that forever, so then that must be true. Versus when I have this conversation about, like, no, just a second. That could also be because the story in her head is whatever that is. I mean, it's the basis of therapy for me. Lisa, how do we check our assumptions? And rarely can we do that alone. Host/Lisa: Very interesting. Makes a lot of sense. Dr. Jody: I was just thinking, when we get stuck in our heads over, like, this happened, or I should have, I could have, I would have. There's sometimes truth to all of those things. But again, it's the ability, I think, to then be able to check that every once in a while that allows us to heal or shift or move past something. And I just think about how critically important that is. And if it's so hard to look at each other and the opportunities to look away become greater, I just see, like, there's the issue. Host/Lisa: Do you think it's possible for people to go through trauma, tragedies, life changing situations, and still come out and be resilient? Dr. Jody: Yes, 150,000%. Because, see, again, it's not what happens to us that is the issue. It's what happens inside of our bodies as a result of what happens to us that becomes the deciding factor on whether we. How not whether. How we heal, how we move forward, how our story of our life continues. Because it's not a question of whether bad things are going to happen or hard things are going to happen or difficult things are going to happen. It's when. And mostly it's about who we have to walk us through that, who we have, how we make sense of those things, what is in our world to help us navigate those big emotions that dictate this word, resilience. Host/Lisa: So would that be an explanation, then, why some people seem to kind of roll through horrific things and other people just struggle so greatly? Dr. Jody: Yeah. I mean, context is a prerequisite for everything. And so people would often say to me when I worked at the children's hospital for ten years on a locked psychiatric inpatient unit, and we would see some kids who seemingly have just quite a lovely story, but they were really struggling. And then there'd be another kid who survived foster care and multiple generations of abuse and neglect, and they seem seemingly like we're doing better. And the question so much isn't about what's wrong with you, it's what happened to you that helps me understand our ability to then navigate the world. And even in some of the worst know kids or people who have experienced unthinkable things, if there was somebody, opportunities to walk through it, to navigate it, to be supported through it, to have a place to help make meaning. I mean, those are Kessler's words, the five stages of grief. The 6th stage is always about meaning. And it doesn't mean it excuses or condones, but it assists in the understanding of. And that, I think, is really what's critically important in the human condition. Host/Lisa: I find people's stories of adversity just so interesting and so inspiring. And it seems like you say, sometimes the most unlikely person is shining the brightest. And I think, why can't I be more like them? Or what's their secret? Dr. Jody: Yeah, 100%. And I think sometimes we really just wonder about how people did this or do this or survive, or how can you be so positive when you're in the middle of a cancer diagnosis or you've experienced whatever? I do really think it's who you have, what happened in that process, who do you have in your world? And I think all of those things, that context becomes so critical, the story. Right. Host/Lisa: Very true. So let's just shift gears here a little bit. I think we have a lot of parents who are listening to this podcast, and I know I've been getting a lot of questions, how can parents support our kids in this age of disconnection, and how can we bring them back to us? Dr. Jody: Yeah, I love think. You know, part of the question always has been, and we're not the first generation that has experienced this. I mean, if I think about every generation that comes before us, it's, know, innovation and technological. You know, we thought the Beatles were going to be the death of everybody, and then Elvis and his hip swinging was going to be bad, and then all the pot smokers were going to kill the world. And I think sometimes when we want to stay connected to this next generation, it's a very big task. But it's so critically important to figure out how they speak, how they learn, how they communicate, and instead of trying to get them to do it the way that it's always been done. What do we know about TikTok? What do you know about pronouns? What do you know about vaping? What is the thing? And they know the thing. And sometimes one of the biggest lessons, the greatest lessons I've ever been taught from my children, and I think it's like when I watch my kids with their grandparents, when I watch them having conversations about the residential school system or pronouns or whatever that looks like, and watching them wonder about those things is a place that I just love so much. And so I think so much of this is a, meeting them where they're at, right? And b, on purpose, because you're tired, too, really recognizing that if you're going to say you're off screens or everybody's phones down, then what are we going to do about that instead? Are ours phones down? Are we in the place where we get to stay connected as well? And I think about that all the time. I say to my kids, Kate off while I sit there on my computer or my phone. And I think a lot of that comes down to how do we, on purpose, on purpose, connect with each other, which requires things like charging your phone outside your bed, going into a restaurant with your friends and family, and leaving the phones in the car, things like that. Host/Lisa: That's brilliant. I know after we lost our daughter, Katie, our son was 15 at the time, and I think being 15 these days is kind of a hard place to be on a good day. But after we lost our daughter, connecting with him, literally, I felt like we had a five minute window every day. If we were lucky, and that was the supper table. And he started taking an auto mechanics class, which I know absolutely nothing about. But that was our ground of connection, and that was what lit him up. And I think that time in our lives really taught me so much about, as you're saying, meeting people where they're at. He didn't want to meet me where I was at because I was a hot mess. And seeing your mom broken into a million pieces must be a hard thing. But when I met him where he was at, he ended up meeting me halfway, and then that transitioned into going for drives because he thought I might need to talk. And he loved to be in his car. He's a car guy. Dr. Jody: Yeah. Host/Lisa: Oh, man. And being in the car with your kids is the greatest thing ever, because as the driver, you sure as heck better not be on your phone. And when you're talking, you don't have to look at each other. Dr. Jody: Yeah. Right. And I think that's the mean. Staring at each other is weird, but spending time physically present with each, you know, watching our phone side by side. But when you're driving and having a conversation or listening to music or, you know, what is your favorite Taylor Swift song? I mean, I'm now a huge swiftie because my daughter makes me sing everything that ever was. That's the point, right. Is really, how do we stay present in the physical proximity with each other? Host/Lisa: Well, the interesting thing with my son is when he was still living at home, I would see that this is the way he would be with his friends. He would meet them where they were at. Dr. Jody: Yeah. Neat. Yeah. He's a superstar. Host/Lisa: Yeah, he really is. He's been through stuff that I wouldn't wish on anybody. But at the same time, he knows as well as I do that because he's been through that hard stuff, he can get through anything. And I think that that has been a gift, a gift that nobody expected to come out of a disaster. Dr. Jody: And I think also, if I can, I mean, I haven't met your husband, but just a little that I get to spend time with you and watch you on social media and do all those kind of things. I think that we should never, ever underestimate our ability to be as present as we possibly can in our pain. And I think there is probably so much debilitating pain when we think about, like, what happens when you're in pain or you're in grief is you stop looking. Right. Because you physically have to deal with your own personal internal structure. You can't give away something if you're absolutely broken inside. It's impossible. Yeah. And so when you get that experience, our ability to sort of heal our own selves first, to be able to look inside, to even get us remotely well enough to be able to start to give it away again, or to check on our other babies, or to look at our partners, or to do all those things, that becomes some of the most difficult steps. And even if we do that in small chunks, even if we do that in seconds, in milliseconds, that is where the healing lies, because it is that transition from that internal locus to that external locus. And gratitude lives in that external focus, the reconnection, the hope, the little slivers, as tiny and minuscule as they are of joy, live outside of that. And so that shift, and having something to want you to shift, or to kick your *** enough to shift, as I just watch you be so connected to that amazing human, I know that he's so lucky to have you both. Host/Lisa: I give him a lot of credit too, because he was the reason that I put my feet on the floor every day, probably for the first two years after Katie died. And I thank God all the time because it forced me to figure out a way that I could carry grief in one hand and life in the other, and that they could coexist. And then I realized if I would have had a third hand, that joy was in there too. And when I was grieving, it didn't mean that I couldn't have joy. And when I was dealing with my son or trying to parent, didn't mean that I wasn't grieving. And that all of these things could coexist in their own little way. And it was just a lot of aha. Moments, if you will. Grief has taught me a lot. Dr. Jody: Well, I love that so much because I think that we all play these roles, the griever and the grievy. Oftentimes in the exact same moment, we are experiencing debilitating grief, unthinkable loss. And then the people around us are also experiencing that, whether because it's of the same loss or because they have their. Nobody gets out of here alive. And that's the thing that just ******* knocks me on my feet all the time. I can't believe that people lose people every day. I can't believe that we lost my mother in law just suddenly, tragically, last January. And I remember being in those moments thinking, like, how the, like, this was not the plan. How do people do this? Aren't you amazed at that, Lisa? Aren't you just like the people are walking around like you are conducting a podcast, living your life and you had to bury your own baby. It's remarkable to me that in this human condition, we can love so deeply and lose so greatly and still live so fully. Host/Lisa: We are so much stronger than we know. I remember literally laying on the floor in the days that followed Katie's accident, just thinking and swearing at God, saying all the bad words. Are you effing kidding me? And yet, like you say, here I am. And I could list off dozens and dozens and dozens of people who've been through, frankly, far worse than me, who are still standing, who are still shining. And it is also part of the human condition that we have that ability. Dr. Jody: It's remarkable, and nobody wants it. And people say that all the time. I didn't want to have to do this. When people say, I think I've even heard you say this, people are like, you're so strong, you're so amazing. Well, when you don't have a ******* choice, it's remarkable what you learn. And everybody intends to be kind in those words. I'm not saying you should never say that to anybody. I get why we say that to people and why people admire you for navigating things the way that you do or you have. But I think it's also sometimes in this human condition, the ability to just really marvel at how incredible we are, how we were never meant to do any of this alone, and to never, ever underestimate your power in a season of knowing that so many people, in fact, everybody you know, is in a state of grief, for mourning. And if that's not a reason for kindness, for compassion, for seeking first to understand man, I don't know what is. Host/Lisa: Oh, I agree. And I think sometimes it takes these awful tragedies and traumas to make you realize that we're all a heartbeat away from something going completely sideways in life. Dr. Jody: And we get into this comparative suffering place, too. Well, at least I didn't lose a child. Or at least you're not in the middle of a cancer diagnosis. Or at least we try to do all of those things right. But as hard as that is, and as I would never want to take away from anybody else, that doesn't get us anywhere. Right. We just honor the spaces that we're each respectively in. And it's knowing that it will be, regardless of how hard it is or what that looks like for anybody, it will be so much easier if we're in it compassionately and together. Host/Lisa: I think you're right. I think the way we approach things is what it's all about. Dr. Jody: Yeah. Host/Lisa: As a clinical psychologist, I'd be really curious about how you think grief and disconnection are related. Dr. Jody: Oh, gosh. I feel like you know the answer to this question. Okay, so I'm going to take you back to labor. What happens when we are in labor is that there is a necessity. Well, not even labor, but. Okay. So I'm going to just use labor for a minute. But when we're in so much pain, what we tend to do is shy away from it or clench or avoid or go undercover. Okay. Now, the initial response is so brilliant. From a neurobiological, even survival perspective, you should shy away. Cower from. Back away from the pain. Like, if somebody's going to kick you in the teeth, it's a good idea to just be like, try to back away. Versus, like, yeah, just give it to me. Now. Once we hit that initial response from the body trying to protect itself, either emotionally, physically, whatever that pain looks like, the healing often happens when we sink into it, when we actually don't avoid it. But rarely can we do that alone because our body has now understood that this is so ******* painful and that the thing I need to do is just avoid it or shy away from it or clench significantly to try to get away from it. What I always think about this in labor is that when that first contraction comes, now, you can think about this all the time before the labor starts. If anybody's ever been in labor, you can be with me. If you haven't, you can imagine it'll work the same before. You practice this **** called la maz or breathing, or like, you get a dolphin and assisted pool birth **** and you make a birth plan and we're going to just breathe through whatever. And you practice the breathing. You do all the ****. I don't know if you've ever experienced this, but what happens in the first contraction when that first ************ comes along and just punches you right in the ******? Host/Lisa: What happens to the breathing out the freaking window? Dr. Jody: Right? So we know all day long what we should be doing in the moment, and we can practice it as much, but when it hits. When it hits, there is no preparation for it. Now, it is often helpful to do some work before so your body knows what it feels like to be relaxed. All of those kind of things are not for not, but often what is necessary in that moment, in things like emotional pain or physical pain, is having the reminder, either in your own internal mechanisms that you've built in which are usually not accessible or a village of people or a person or a community or something to remind you about the importance of just sinking, of just going in. And so I can tell you, when I was in labor with my son, I had the most incredible midwife, because I be ********* if I was going to listen to my husband, who was like, jody, look at me. I was like, oh, I'm going to rip your wedding ring right off your finger and shove it. And this midwife, God bless her, was the best thing that ever happened to me. So could grab my hands, could look at me, and could say, okay, I want you to open everything in your body in this moment. We're going to get that baby, that pain, to go as smoothly and as gently to us as we can make it happen. I need you to help me with that. So it's going to hurt, and you're going to want to sink into it, or you're going to want to, sorry, shy away from it. But what I really want you to do to the best of your ability is to sink into it. And it's going to be hard, and it's not going to feel even right. But I promise you, it will make this process easier. And she probably said it way more articulately than that. But I can tell you, for so many reasons, it was a beautiful experience for me. Our twin birth was a completely different story. But I attribute so much of that ability to have that experience with her walking me through it. And I feel like that is so true with grief. The problem with labor and grief is labor is the celebration of you get something great on the end of it if everything goes well. Yeah, grief is the exact same process, but people are so ******* scared of it, because what is the end goal, right? How do we ever, ever get through this? We cannot bring Katie back. We cannot do this. So we avoid also those of us experiencing it, but those of us around it. So it makes the process of navigating, healing, if that's even a word we want to use, of creating a story around it that allows us to live again or be in this world now with this other chapter that is a part of our story in any way, that is imagining that it could even be better than it was before, that the next years of your life could be equally as good as those with our loved ones in them. Is that a possibility? And I believe that to the core of me, that it is. It is so hard to do, because our instinct, our safety is to clench, is to avoid, is to not put ourselves in positions where we have to see the pity in the eyes of other people. And it's sometimes even altruistic. We don't want other people to have to feel bad or it gets into a place of hate where we're like, you ******, you got your kids and you can't even come over and say merry Christmas to me. Get bit. I'm not even going to go out. And the result, I think, sometimes is survival and is necessary. The long term effect, I think, is it becomes very difficult. The anticipatory anxiety becomes even more debilitating than the grief. Host/Lisa: 100%. I see this all the time because the first couple of trips to the grocery store, oh my God, oh my God, oh my God. Hope I don't see anybody. Oh my God. There's my neighbor. Oh my God. I haven't talked to her yet. If you'd like reminders when new episodes of the Rising Strong podcast are released, make sure you're on the notification list. You can find that at bitly risingstrongupdates. That's bit ly risingstrongupdates. Now back to the show. I've always said that feeling is healing. There is no way forward until you lean into that horrible, uncomfortable stuff. Dr. Jody: Again and again and again. And that's the issue. It's not an end game. How would you answer this question when I would say, has the intensity and the frequency of that feeling of grief changed for you since moment one? Host/Lisa: Absolutely it has. I think the best analogy I've heard was actually out of a dad's mouth. And that was now President Biden. He compared the loss of his son and the grief he experienced to waves. And he said at the beginning, every wave is pulling you under and you're crawling to get back up for air, and you barely get a breath. And another one sucks you down. Another one sucks you down. And he said it changes because those waves still come, but they're not as intense usually. And when they do come, they're farther apart. And he said it much more eloquently than that. That is exactly what it's like. I will grieve, Katie, as long as I walk this earth, but I don't fall to my knees like I did. I can have great days. I can go on holidays with my husband. I can go to parties. I can go to barbecues and have a phenomenal time. I never forget her. I never forget my grief. Yes, but grief does change. And I really, honestly can't think of a better word to use than just change. Dr. Jody: I love it. Yeah, I love it. And I think so oftentimes, too, it's like we would just like to erase it or wish it never happened or all of those things. And I think, again, that is so natural and normal. And it's like that step of sort of integrating it into the story that you never wanted to be a part of your story. That's where the intensity and the frequency decrease, those waves, as you say. I love that concept of the waves. Host/Lisa: I would do anything, and, I mean, I'd put myself in jail if I could do anything to have my daughter back. Dr. Jody: Yeah. Host/Lisa: I would do almost anything to have avoided that physical, mental, emotional pain and to see it in my husband and my son. But I also know that the growth I have experienced all comes from that pain. Dr. Jody: Yes. Host/Lisa: And that I am so grateful for. Katie still continues to give me gifts in her death. As crazy and bizarre as that sounds. Dr. Jody: That is not crazy or bizarre at all. That would be the whole purpose. When I think about this six stage of meaning, I cannot fathom why one of my best friends on the planet had to end her life at 44 when she's just had her two babies. She's waited for her whole life. There's no concept in my life that that makes sense if I stay stuck in that place. And when I watch what has happened as a result of how many times I've spoke about her, how many times people have spoke to me about her, when I watch her babies and all of these kind of things, then it has to mean something, I think. And it takes people sometimes a lifetime or never to get there. But I think her legacy, her ability to continue to influence the world better live forever. And that's my hope for me. That's my hope for you. Right. Is that there is this place where that continues to happen. And I believe that to the core of me, about your little girl. I mean, I never got to meet her, but I feel like I know her. When we got to present together in the room that day, there was not a question to me that she was there cheering her mom on. It was so phenomenal to just see what she has now because she's only always an inch away from you, moved you to do, and in and of itself, that alone is it. That alone is enough. That alone is phenomenal. Right? Host/Lisa: Yeah. I do feel so grateful, and I do feel so fortunate that she is still a part of my. Dr. Jody: Always. Host/Lisa: Yes, always. Jody, you are a one in a million woman. Thank you so much for sharing your insights and expertise on relationships and connection. Today you are a blessing. Dr. Jody: I loved every second. Host/Lisa: Thanks for listening. Friends. Remember to stay well and be resilient. Catch you next time.

Isn't It Lovely? Podcast
Isn't it Lovely to Feel Seen? with Dr. Jody Carrington

Isn't It Lovely? Podcast

Play Episode Listen Later Jan 16, 2024 48:29


CW: Adult Language It's a reconnection revolution as Rachel and Tracy welcome psychologist, speaker, and author Dr. Jody Carrington to the podcast for a dynamic conversation about counteracting humanity's loneliness epidemic with empathy, emotional regulation, and Ram Dass' simple, but powerful observation, “we are all just walking each other home.” Tracy and Jody examine specific ways to help various communities, from teachers and healthcare responders to law enforcement officers and children, lay down their trauma and work through it in healthy ways - and why it's essential to seek context and exchange asking, “What is wrong with you?” for “What happened to you?”. Jody and Rachel grapple with the significance of having constant access to loved ones through technology and social media, as Jody explains why it's vital to stop trying to fix our loved ones' problems, instead simply acknowledging the broad spectrum of necessary human emotion, from sadness and anxiety to anger and fear - not just happiness. Everyone considers the mystique of the true crime podcast, citizen journalism, and the international phenomenon that is Taylor Swift. Episode Mentions: Dr. Jody Carrington's Website: https://www.drjodycarrington.com/ Dr. Jody Carrington's Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/drjodycarrington/?hl=en Dr. Jody Carrington's Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/drjodycarrington Dr. Jody Carrington's Podcast: Everyone Comes from Somewhere https://www.drjodycarrington.com/podcast/ Feeling Seen: Reconnecting in a Disconnected World by Dr. Jody Carrington https://amzn.to/47DRjkT Kids These Days: A Game Plan For (Re)Connecting With Those We Teach, Lead, & Love by Dr. Jody Carrington https://amzn.to/3HmaF3m Teachers These Days: Stories and Strategies for Reconnection by Dr. Jody Carrington https://amzn.to/3Hix4hZ New Surgeon General [Dr. Vivek Murthy] Advisory Raises Alarm about the Devastating Impact of the Epidemic of Loneliness and Isolation in the United States Walking Each Other Home: Conversations on Loving and Dying by Ram Dass and Mirabai Bush https://amzn.to/3Hijfjo Everyone Comes From Somewhere Podcast Season 1 Episode 12: “How Trauma Shapes Our Lives” https://shows.acast.com/everyone-comes-from-somewhere/episodes/how-trauma-shapes-our-lives Dr. Peter Levine Dr. Gabor Mate Dr. Bruce Perry What Are You Loving: Dr. Jody Carrington: Taylor Swift and Travis Kelce's Relationship; Harper's Bazaar: “Taylor Swift and Travis Kelce's Full Relationship Timeline” https://www.harpersbazaar.com/celebrity/latest/a45301082/taylor-swift-travis-kelce-full-relationship-timeline/ Rachel: Who Killed JFK? Podcast https://www.iheart.com/podcast/1119-who-killed-jfk-127000428/ Tracy: Writer Jessica Reed Kraus @houseinhabit https://www.instagram.com/houseinhabit/?hl=en

The Midlife Feast
#95 - Is Feeling Seen the Missing Part of Your Midlife Story? with Dr Jody Carrington

The Midlife Feast

Play Episode Listen Later Jan 15, 2024 42:26 Transcription Available


Everyone comes from somewhere. It's a simple, perhaps obvious statement, but one that is more relevant than we might realize. In this episode, I'm joined by psychologist, speaker, and author, Dr. Jody Carrington. Jody believes that finding the courage and the safe places to tell our stories is what we need most as we navigate a distracted and disconnected world.While I haven't known Jody for long, we quickly connected over the bathing suit story she shared on her podcast (what she calls the connector of all stories). I hope that by sharing some of these relatable battles with body image, you'll realize you're not alone. Jody will also talk about two of the biggest tools for recovery in moments like these: gratitude and agency. You have a story too, and it needs to be told. Join us if you are craving friendships where we can trade in comparison for the confidence to finally take up space.To learn more about Jody and her work, connect with her on her website at www. drjodycarrington.com, or follow her on Instagram @drjodycarrington. Looking for a place to learn more about midlife, menopause nutrition, and intuitive eating? Click here to grab one of my free resources and learn what I've got "on the menu" including my 1:1 and group programs. https://www.menopausenutritionist.ca/links

Rising Strong: Mental Health & Resilience
Laura Lawrence - Finding Purpose after Heartbreak & Betrayal

Rising Strong: Mental Health & Resilience

Play Episode Listen Later Dec 12, 2023 33:30


In this podcast episode, guest Laura Lawrence shares her powerful journey of finding purpose within pain. Through heartbreak and betrayal, she has experienced profound personal growth and resilience. Laura, an author, speaker, educator, and mental health advocate, opens up about enduring a heartbreaking and life-altering breakup. From the moment she heard the words 'I don't love you anymore,' she navigated a rollercoaster of emotions and started over as a single mother. Despite the overwhelming challenges, she recognized the need for professional support and sought help for herself and her children. Through alternative modalities like Body Talk, she was able to release stored emotions and heal her mind, body, and spirit. Laura's dedication to mental health led her to become a mental health advocate for youth. Her passion for working with young people inspired her to establish the nonprofit organization Youth Matter Canada, empowering thousands of kids to speak up about their mental health. Through her book 'Behind Closed Doors' and upcoming podcast, Laura continues to share her story and empower others to overcome adversity and embrace resilience. Laura's Links: www.lauralawrence.ca/shop (link to purchase book) www.instagram.com/lauralawrence.author (IG account) .................................................................. Rising Strong LINKS: FREE resource: Create More ME Time: bit.ly/metimeresource Get all the podcast updates and notifications of new episodes: bit.ly/risingstrongupdates Support this podcast by purchasing a Calming Journal: bit.ly/calmingjournals Follow us on Instagram: @risingstrongpodcast Facebook page: send your a screenshot of your podcast reviews via the 'comment' button here: @Risingstrongpodcast WIN SWAG: Screenshot your 5-star review for a chance to win some Rising Strong swag! then send it to Lisa@LisaKBoehm.com Remember to follow and subscribe so you never miss an episode .................................................................. TRANSCRIPT: HOST/Lisa: In the journey through heartbreak and betrayal, many find themselves lost in the chaos of emotions. How is it that some people find the purpose within the pain and experience profound personal growth? Today's guest, Laura Lawrence, is going to tell you exactly that. Laura is an author, speaker, educator, and mental health advocate who has shared the stage with powerful female voices like Dr. Jody Carrington and Jess Tatu. Hi, I'm Lisa, and this is Rising strong mental health and resilience. On this podcast, we dive into different kinds of adversity and the resilience required to rise above. Make sure to follow or subscribe so you don't miss a single episode. Now, let's get started. All right. Today I have Laura Lawrence in studio with me. I met Laura about a year and a half ago, and I was in awe of her inner strength and confidence the moment I met her. She has weathered some storms that some of you will relate to, and her resilience is inspiring. Welcome to the show, Laura. Laura: Thank you for having me, and thank you for those kind words, Host/Lisa: all truths. Laura, you have endured a heartbreaking and life altering breakup. Tell us about the events that unfolded when you heard the words, I don't love you anymore. Laura: Wow. Well, gosh, so many events unfolded after those words, and at the time, it was absolutely the hardest thing I had ever had to navigate in my life. There were so many emotions, so many layers to it, and starting over in life at the age of 32 with two children under the age of six was absolutely terrifying. But I'll take you back a little bit and tell you kind of where it all began. So I met my ex husband when we were 16 years old. We were high school sweethearts. We got married when I was 22. And in our 17 year journey together, we walked side by side through so many things. We had two children together. We grieved the loss of a child through a miscarriage together. We grieved the loss of loved ones together. We embarked on new career paths, new journeys. But it was about at the ten year marriage mark that we found ourselves in the depths of conflict that really had started many years prior. Both of us were carrying our own inner child wounds, over, committed to work, chaotic schedules, stresses of life work, raising children, really all the things that two people in a relationship or a marriage face. And we were facing them with two different mindsets, two different belief systems, two different sets of upbringing in our families. But it was after one fateful argument that we had that was the tipping point. It was the proverbial straw that broke the camel's back. I would say he was emotionally depleted, and so was I. But he was done. Like, actually done. So from that night of that argument to today, almost, oh, gosh, twelve years later, there has always been four sides to this multilayered love story and separation story. There's my side, there's his. Of course, there's our children's side and the outside world, who always had their view from what I like to call the cheap seats. Host/Lisa: Wow, that's really interesting. You always hear there's two sides to every story, which I agree with. I'd never thought about those other two dimensions that you mentioned. Yeah, that's really powerful. And did you find that the cheap seats were giving you some difficult times as well, on top of everything else that you were dealing with? Laura: Oh, yes, they certainly were. It was a very public and painful separation divorce. It's interesting. Just a couple of weeks ago, I heard yet another rumor, honestly, a decade later. So, yeah, living in a small community, being in the public eye, as at the time, I was a teacher, an educator in the community. We lived a block from the school. We ran a business together. We were often in the public's eye through community service organizations. So it was definitely a journey. Host/Lisa: How did this all make you feel? Laura: It was gutting. It was heart wrenching. There were so many days and nights where I felt hopeless. It felt like my entire world and the ideals that I and many of us cling on to since we're children, imagining what a marriage would look like and feel like I mean, all of it came crashing down at once. And now when I say that, I say that kind of tongue in cheek because of course, it didn't all come crashing down in a day. It was years in the making. But it felt like a shattered ceiling, a crumbling floor. There's so many ways I could describe it, and I often describe that time as if it felt similar to falling into a deep, dark well and that I could see the light just out of the distance of the top of the well. But it was cold, it was lonely, it was dark. Every time I tried to kind of clamor up the sides of the well, I would fall back down again. And I, to that point, had never experienced depression. It was even hard for me to understand seeing loved ones or friends go through depression because I just had never been there in my own mind and body. But if you've ever been through a breakup or a separation or divorce, you know very well that gut punching feeling of hearing somebody tell you that they're done or they just don't love you anymore, or that's it, there's really no going back from that moment. Host/Lisa: Do you think it was harder for you to navigate the path forward, or do you think it was harder for you to watch your children navigate the path forward? Laura: Wow, that's an interesting question. I would say that both were very difficult in different ways where, I mean, I definitely felt helpless. There were things that were within my control that I could have done leading up to that point and then also in trying to find resolution. But for children who are involved in separation and divorce, they really are helpless. They really are the collateral damage, so to speak. And I wanted to ensure that as much as I could have the power over ensuring that my children didn't feel like collateral damage, it's almost inevitable, just with all of the layers that kind of ensue following a separation and divorce. Host/Lisa: Did you seek professional support for yourself or for yourself and your children? Laura: Yeah, I mean, 100%. I know. I think when you had sent me the show notes, you had asked, how did this affect your mental health? And when I was thinking about it, the very first thing that came to my mind was the easier question would be, like, how didn't it affect my mental health? It affected absolutely every aspect of my wellness. I could not sleep. I could not eat. I could not focus or concentrate at work. I cried for hours and hours daily. I fixated became obsessed with trying to solve it, work it out, make it work. I was anxious. I was depressed. And although I never made a formal plan to take my life and I don't think I've ever publicly spoken about this as a speaker and an author, I'm not even sure this is in my book. Actually, I'm pretty sure it isn't. But I do remember one evening that I was driving home late and the thought had crossed my mind what would happen if I just allowed my car to slip across the solid yellow line? And it was just for a fraction of a minute that that thought was there. But I clearly remember that. And I couldn't show up as my best self for my children or my students. I really was an empty shell. I lost 30 pounds so quickly, many people asked and wondered if I was sick. There were even questions whether I had a terminal illness because I had to hide so much for quite a few months, as we hadn't told our children or our families for a while. And the act of hiding the truth really took its toll, I think, not on me, but on all of us. I mean, on my ex husband as well, and on the children. So absolutely I needed to seek professional help. And this part I write extensively about in my book. It started with an intervention weekend. And that's how it goes for many of us, especially when we're in the depths of that well of depression and we really can't see the light at all, it often takes somebody in our inner circle, our loved ones, who reach down and pull us up or pull us out. And I'm very thankful to two very good friends who are concerned, deeply concerned for me. And so they had planned an intervention weekend. It was that weekend that I was introduced to the psychologist who would become like a grandmother to me later and who would stand beside me in this dance of healing. Over the next decade, I was introduced to two very powerful alternative modalities called Reiki and Body Talk during that weekend, and I sought medical help with my doctor, was prescribed medications to help with my sleep and help with my anxiety. So it was like full force after that intervention weekend and kind of throwing all the tools that I could at trying to rebuild so many things that felt broken. Host/Lisa; Now, I know you fairly well, and I also know you to be a very strong woman. And I think anybody who's been through difficult times ultimately knows that the work comes from us. I absolutely think that a therapist, a counselor, is so important when you're going through difficult times, but ultimately that work has to come from within us. Do you remember a turning point when you kind of pulled up your bootstraps and really thought, okay, what do I have to do now to take myself forward and my kids forward? Or was it very evolutionary for you? Laura: No, I mean, I knew that right from the beginning, of course, as I mentioned that. And anybody listening to this, who's ever been any type of conflict in a relationship or a marriage knows that the tension, the conflict builds. And often two people are very different. They have different belief systems, they different subconscious programming. They solve problems differently, they love differently, they communicate differently. And so finding that dance with a partner and finding what works for you and what works for them, it's a tumultuous dance. And I remember taking so much responsibility for so many things and being really hard on myself about how I made so many mistakes or I could have done this better, or I could have done this different. And when it was time for my healing journey, I just knew there was nobody else that was going to do it except for me. And I hadn't been studying any alternative modalities at that point yet, but I had been doing a lot of reading in Conscious Living and Consciousness, and I had been reading books by authors like Deepak Chopra. It's very interesting. Looking back now, it was almost as if my subconscious was preparing me or my psyche was preparing me for what was to come. And then, of course, the path that it led me down, and exploring more of the complementary alternative methods of healing, I absolutely then learned the power of healing yourself and working on that which you can control and the only thing you control which is yourself. Host/Lisa: So true. So how has Body Talk helped you on your journey? Laura: As I mentioned, it was one of those modalities that I was introduced to in that intervention weekend. I had never heard of it before, which is the story that most people will say when it crosses their path. I didn't know what it was. I had no idea what to expect. And I remember after I had that first session on that intervention weekend, I was not impressed, I was not enthused. I thought, I don't know what that was. Didn't really work for me, but cool, thanks. Turns out it kept coming back into my life. And I think that the things that are meant for us always do. They always keep doorknocking. Right? And it turned out to be life changing. The most powerful transformations in my mind, my body and my spirit were all because of this amazing modality. And I would say so for many of my family members as well who have experienced it, including my own children. Like I said after my first session, I was so skeptical and I would even say that didn't work. But I kept being called back to it. And what I tell people about Body Talk is you don't find it, it finds you. That was really cool that it just kept coming back into my awareness. And what it allowed me to do was explore how deeply I was attached to belief systems that were formed very early, before I even knew, in my subconscious between zero to seven, in my own experiences with my family and how I was parented and all the things that happen in that core formation period between age zero to seven. And I realized how so many of those belief systems that I would attach to were wreaking havoc not just in my mental wellness, but really trickling down into the physical manifestation of pain and illness in my body. Body Talk allowed me to release stored emotion from years of experiences and conflict that I was carrying, whether it be inner conflict or conflict that I had had with people in my past or family members in my past. It really was life changing. I just felt like it was the next thing for me to do. It was the next step. It was really what I needed to explore for my full path of healing. So when I left the teaching profession, I began to study Body Talk and I became a certified practitioner and I took all of my advanced classes and I started a business in a community where there were no Body Talk practitioners. Nobody had ever heard of it. I am so grateful for every client who's trusted me sitting beside them and walking beside them in their healing journey. It has been not only healing for them, but also for myself. Host/Lisa: I know we've had this conversation before, but isn't it interesting how when we can get to that space where we can help other people with their healing, that we also benefit from the healing that comes from that work? Laura: Yeah, it's a two way street. It's very reciprocal in nature and forever. As long as I'm living, I will practice Body Talk in some aspect. So let's talk a little bit about the work that you do as a mental health advocate for our youth. Yeah, that's something that I just have always been really passionate about working with youth. So I'm the oldest grandchild on both sides, and I've always been surrounded by kids and always the oldest one in the group. I've been drawn to working with youth since I was a child. I had a vision of becoming a doctor when I was in my last few years of high school, and I changed lanes at the last minute and became a teacher. So I went into the College of Education at the University of Saskatchewan and finished my degree as a high school science teacher. I spent over 15 years in a rural school setting teaching high school sciences and biology and chemistry. I was a coach. I was a mentor. I worked with kids outside of the classroom for many, many hours. I really loved my job and the kids I got to work with, and I had a front row seat, seeing many youth struggle with their own mental health. And this was again, I've been out of the classroom for ten years. Even ten years ago, we did not talk about mental health the way we do now. And so often, kids struggled in silence. But I always had that innate kind of intuitive gut feeling when a kid didn't look okay or when I noticed something that had changed in their demeanor or their attitude or their motivation or their behavior. After certifying as a Body Talk practitioner, after I'd left the classroom, I began creating Mindfulness in the Classroom workshops and professional development opportunities for schools and students, and found myself being hired back into schools, into classrooms, but from a different lens. And I created Mindfulness for Kids camps and workshops that I hosted in my local area. I just absolutely love engaging in youth that way. And then in 2019, I had this wild and crazy idea one day while taking a road trip with my husband, that I thought it would be just so incredible to host a mental health conference day for kids. I had been to so many conferences in my professional career, and they always motivated me and uplifted me and just gave me that extra spark that I needed. And I thought, how cool would that be to do for kids? And that was the beginning of starting my nonprofit organization, youth Matter Canada. And thanks to the help of many passionate individuals in my volunteer team working with Youth Matter, we have been able to help thousands of kids all across the province of Saskatchewan and beyond reach out and speak up for their mental health. Host/Lisa: So important. I think every year that goes by, we're seeing more and more of a crisis, and what a better place to start than with our youth? I love that. Laura: Yeah, I think it's the only place to start, really, for me. It's all I know to do is to help the youth because they're our future. I guess when I say the only place to start, it doesn't mean that we write the rest of us off who are midlife. But I think that when we're taking a real serious look on how we're going to change our approach, we need to start looking at how we spend time with engaging youth in conversations about mental wellness. Host/Lisa: What an incredible gift to give kids all these tools and coping skills that they can use all through life. Laura: Yeah. And it's been incredible working with thousands of kids and talking to them about mental health and having just heart to heart conversations, teaching them some different strategies for self regulation and self awareness. They're not as attached to rigid belief systems, so they are willing to think about things and look at things from a different perspective than adults. And I just think that's just the coolest mindset when you're approaching something like mental wellness. When we travel around the province with our Be Kind to Your Mind team, going into different schools, we have the absolute best conversations with these kids. When we ask them, what does mental health look like? When we talk about the stigmas, when we talk about how just because somebody looks a certain way, we can't assume that they're not struggling, we have this really cool practice we do with them called the imaginary backpack practice. Where we talk about. Every one of us is born with this invisible backpack. And it all starts fairly empty from the time we're born. But then everything that happens to us, every experience that we have with our families, with the outside world, loads into the backpack. So emotions and conflict and trauma and that backpack gets so heavy if we don't learn ways to unpack it, if we don't get a team of people who love us to help us unpack it. And we actually do this visually with the kids by getting them to put a really heavy backpack on their back and then a really light backpack. And it's just incredible, the conversations that come from that so powerful. Host/Lisa: So it just seems like a natural progression, really, that you've gone from the kind of work that you're explaining to us with youth matter and have rolled that really into your speaking career and on stage. I know you talk about lots of things, including Adversity, struggles, challenges, mental health, all kinds of things. Why do you think it's important that you talk about mental health? Laura: Well, mental health is the root of everything. It's the root of absolutely everything. We cannot have any conversation about anything affecting our lives without having a conversation about the state of our mental health. It is the foundation and root of our families, our communities, our work. For me, there's no division. Yeah, like, it's all mental health related. It's just immersed in our everyday life, in the way we talk, the conversations we have. It's so cool. The other day my five year old said to me he could really sense that I was having a bad morning. He could sense that my emotions were starting to become very overwhelming for me. And he looked at me and he said, mom, you should just try that rainbow breathing that you teach us. And when I was subbing for him today in their class, their kindergarten class, I could see him from the corner of my eye engaging in a little bit of meditative breath work because he was feeling very overwhelmed. And I mean, that's the power of immersing all of our conversations, our life, our relationships with mental health. Host/Lisa: I couldn't agree more. I think that is where we need to begin with everything. So when you and I met, you were just getting ready to start editing and publishing your book, Behind Closed Doors. Why did you write this book? Laura: It's another loaded question. Well, sharing stories changes and saves lives. And I think that when I have felt, seen, heard, valued and loved, it felt so much easier for me to get through the hard things. And when we're reminded that we're not alone, that we don't need to struggle in silence, that we're not a failure, but rather just human, it gives us the courage to keep going. And I had never imagined years ago that I'd spiral into the deep depression that I did. I had never imagined that I would be navigating a Divorce, a Separation, Coparenting, which is a whole other podcast in and of itself. But I thought if I could help others with tools and mind shifts and practices to help decrease the impact of stress on their minds and bodies, I would continue to do that for the rest of my days. And for me, writing was always such a big part of my own ability to release stored emotion, to cathartically move through hard things that I had been experiencing. And five years ago I founded a mental health movement called Strong as a Mother. And it was a coffee and conversation series that brought women together in the spirit of connection and real conversation. And why I founded it was because I was a mother who was struggling with so many things silently, because that was the strong thing to do. And I knew that I wasn't alone, I couldn't be alone. And that other women have had to have experienced similar things that I had been experiencing behind closed doors and not talking about them. And so I wanted to create a platform, a community, a movement that brought women together to talk about these things. And it morphed into this really beautiful community of courageous and resilient and everyday normal women who shared their vulnerability, their stories, their laughter, their tears with one another at every event that I hosted. And from that journey I just knew that I wanted every woman out there to experience the magic of the stronger as a mother community that we had created, even though they couldn't get to it in person or I'd never experienced it. So I chose 13 women from that movement that had sat heart to heart with me and with other women and bravely shared their stories of navigating some of the lowest of lows and highest of highs from their journeys of marriage and motherhood and mental health. And I wrote a book about it and I wove pieces of my own story in between those little mini memoirs that ended up being a collection of true heart work that I'm really proud of. And I'm so grateful to those women who sat heart to heart with me because it has created an incredible ripple effect of love and support and the messages and emails I get from readers whom I've never met who just said the book changed their life. Just to be able to read a story and see a version of themselves in that story is just so powerful for their own healing and they're really a gentle way that we can learn from one another and to really help understand different things. Host/Lisa: And that's exactly what your book does. You could pick it up. You don't even have to start at the beginning. You can read each memoir on its own. And there is definitely something in your book for everybody. Well done. Laura: Thank you. What's next for you? I feel like every time I talk to you, you've got something new coming up on the horizon. Tell us what's going on. Laura: Well, there's always something next. My busy brain is both a blessing and a curse. And I have quite a creative mind, so I'm always thinking about the next thing. So I have already written three children's books, all under the niche of mental wellness. They are published and available on my website and through Amazon. But I have two more children's books that have been edited and are ready to release, so those will be coming out in 2024. And I have had this dream to actually host my own podcast since 2018. In fact, the graphic designer who did my website back in 2018, I had her put in the corner on the bottom coming soon podcast. But turns out Coming soon was five years. So that'll be coming in early 2024 as well. Well, I'm so excited to hear the first episode when it comes out in the new year. Congratulations on that. Thank you. And I think that what it stems from, and I write about this in the book, is that there are two things that every soul on this planet will experience in life, and those two things are love and pain. And the degree to which we love someone or something is very synonymous to the degree of which we experience pain when that someone or something leaves us or dies or becomes ill. And I think that creating a platform or a movement where you can allow people to feel vulnerable enough to share that love, to share that pain is so cathartic and so healing. I am really excited, but a podcast is not for the faint of heart. So I want to congratulate you as well. Your episodes have been phenomenal. I absolutely love tuning in and I think that many people don't know what goes behind all of the work in creating these platforms. It's hard work. Host/Lisa: It's hard work for sure. Definitely hard work and heart work, as you say. Just for our listeners, I will be listing Laura's books and where you can find them and also the links to connect with Laura if you have any questions for her. But Laura, I would love to know. Now this is a surprise question. She doesn't know that. I'm going to ask this. What does resilience mean to you? Laura: Resilience means picking yourself back up again after you've fallen in that deep, dark well and reaching out to those who love you, who support you to get back up again. I really, truly believe that we can't experience resilience or have resilience on our own. It's not a one woman or one man show. It really comes from our support systems, from those we love, from those that encourage us to get back up again. And for me, resilience meant restarting. The paths that we take are very different from what we thought life would look like. And so resilience is just navigating those paths again in new ways. host/Lisa: Yeah, I agree. And I'm also going to add to that, and this is just my spin on things, but I also think we can't have resilience without having had Adversity first. Laura: Oh, for sure. I just don't think we can truly understand what resilience is until we have fallen flat on our face, unfortunately. Host/Lisa: So how do you think you've become resilient? Sometimes I think I have had to fake it until I actually made it. To be honest. I think that my resilience has really come from my ability to be open minded, but also to build community. I say without doubt, the divorce, the separation led me to today, which I am incredibly grateful for. I have had the most beautiful opportunities to develop rich, abundant and grateful moments and relationships with people that would have never come my way had that frying pan moment not happened in my life. Host/Lisa: Right. It's so true. And I think that when we fall flat on our face and we have to get back up and usually it's not just one time getting up and it's all good, right? We're falling down, getting up, falling down, getting up a whole bunch of times. Every time we get back up, we gain a little bit of confidence. Oh yeah, I was down here before. I remember this place. Okay. And I've got this tool. Belt and it's getting more tools in it. I know how to get up, and I think that that's very powerful as well on our journey, because life is not easy, but we have to just keep going. Laura: We are always one moment away from a different trajectory in life. And so having those tools, having that team, having that community so that they can help pick you up when you go through those lowest of lows is imperative. And I think that we can't get comfortable in thinking that we've arrived at a certain healing space, because healing is just not a linear journey. It is messy, you know, my friend, it is messy. Host/Lisa: It is very messy. Laura, you're a very wise woman, and I am so grateful that you took some time out to spend time with me today. And I know that your message is going to resonate with many of our listeners. So thank you so much for coming today. And to our listeners, be well and stay resilient. Laura: Thanks, Lisa. Host/Lisa

The Liberated Podcast
Imperfectly Parenting With Love

The Liberated Podcast

Play Episode Listen Later Dec 6, 2023 52:51


Oh the wonderful world of parenting! Michelle and Sandy chat about the things they've learned along the way, how they navigate raising kids and the deeper meaning they love to find and reflect on the magical parenting gig. The best quote of all time for parenting is "As long as you are getting it right 30% of the time, your kids will be alright" by Dr. Jody Carrington. We get into parenting with love & logic, colour check ins and so much more! We hope you have a laugh, gain some insights and give yourself some grace in this area of your life. Enrich Course (USE 40%OFF CODE: PODCAST): https://sheisliberated.com/enrich Huge thank you to the talented Audio Engineer for the podcast Terry Robertson!  SCREENSHOT & TAG US ON SOCIAL MEDIA: Liberated:  https://instagram.com/sheisliberated?igshid=MzRlODBiNWFlZA== Sandy:  https://instagram.com/sandy_veilleux?igshid=MzRlODBiNWFlZA== Michelle:  https://instagram.com/michelle.rogers_?igshid=MzRlODBiNWFlZA== Liberated Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/sheisliberated1 PLEASE LEAVE A REVIEW FOR US!!

Spiritual A*****e
"It's Hard to Hate Someone Close Up" (w/Dr. Jody Carrington)

Spiritual A*****e

Play Episode Listen Later Oct 26, 2023 46:29


Brendan talks with the dynamic Dr. Jody Carrington, psychologist, author and host of the very popular “Everyone Comes from Somewhere” podcast.  The two dive right into: the powerful relief of dropping your shoulders, the difference between feeling seen and seeing yourself, why knowing that everyone comes from somewhere changes everything, why you're NOT fine and that's ok, and being chill and going streaking through a funeral. 

Smart Dating Academy - The Podcast
106: Creating REAL connections in a disconnected world

Smart Dating Academy - The Podcast

Play Episode Listen Later Oct 23, 2023 47:07


Today's world can feel more disconnected than ever, and yet we are WIRED for connection.  Humans crave it from family, friends and romantic partners.  How do we begin to "feel seen" and reconnect with people?  Dr. Jody Carrington opens up with a BANG with her story of finding out about her adopted sister when she was in her late 30s (this story will GRIP you).   Jody pursued her Masters, PhD, and made online dating a JOB (went on dates at 10am and 2pm on Saturdays and Sundays).   She met her husband, is a mom of 3, and a renowned therapist, author, and speaker.   In this episode, you will learn: -"We are just here to walk each other home" -- why that Ram Dass quote hangs above her desk and why you NEED to make this your outloook -The best skill you can teach yourself in dating  -What is the most grounding force in the world that can make you feel better right away? -Why agency and gratitude make dating FUN -Why an emotionally regulated partner is SO important -What 4 minutes of eye contact is for! You'll fall in love with Dr. Jody,  BIO Dr. Jody Carrington is a renowned psychologist sought after for her expertise, energy and approach to helping people solve their most complex human-centred challenges.  Jody focuses much of her work around reconnection – the key to healthy relationships and productive teams. As a bestselling author, speaker, and leader of Carrington & Company, Jody uses humour, and all she has learned in her twenty-year career as a psychologist to empower everyone she connects with. In her latest book, Feeling Seen, she dives into what it takes to reconnect a disconnected world. Jody's message is as simple as it is complex: we are wired to do the hard things, but we were never meant to do any of this alone. If you're ready to invest in the love of your life, and if you're tired of being single, schedule a one hour session with Bela to change the trajectory of your dating life!    Join our free newsletter database by signing up here:  www.smartdatingacademy.com/contact Follow us on Instagram at @smartdatingacademy Schedule your consultation with us here!   We are on a waiting list, and would love to help you!  https://www.smartdatingacademy.com/11-coaching/coaching-call-with-bela

Integrative Medicine Podcast
We've never been this disconnected. And it's hurting us.

Integrative Medicine Podcast

Play Episode Listen Later Oct 19, 2023 46:54


Just as an FYI, we swear a lot in this one. Totally unapologetically. The discussion requires swearing.    Today I have the pleasure of gifting you this incredibly important and raw conversation with Dr. Jody Carrington. A psychologist who is changing the world by teaching us about empathy, connection and true friendship. We cut through some important topics such as motherhood, generational roles, friendships that end and feminine leadership.    The entire time we recorded I wasn't sure if I was going to laugh or cry from feeling seen.    We talked about my office anti-harassment voicemail, my “failed” friendships, our partners taking over “mom roles,” and how frigging hard it is being a leader.    Dr. Jody's newest book (coincidentally named Feeling Seen) is about creating connections as the path to health and how to build resiliency in yourself through emotional regulation.    In Jody's words, “We need the big people to be okay. And we're not”.    Jody also has a podcast, an amazing Instagram account and you can learn more about her on her website. 

Divorced Not Dead
Building Resilience in the Age of Burnout

Divorced Not Dead

Play Episode Listen Later Oct 18, 2023 47:37


Join host Caroline Stanbury as she delves deep into the world of resilience and burnout with renowned psychologist, Dr. Jody Carrington. In this enlightening podcast, Caroline and Dr. Carrington discuss the tools, strategies, and mindset shifts necessary to reignite your inner fire and navigate the challenges of the modern age. Together, they explore the art of building resilience, fostering self-compassion, and finding your way back to a life filled with purpose and passion. Tune in for inspiring stories, expert insights, and actionable advice that will empower you to conquer burnout and reignite your life.This episode may contain paid endorsements and advertisements for products and services. Individuals on the show may have a direct, or indirect financial interest in products, or services referred to in this episode.The best relationships are worth fighting for. Try something new in therapy. Visit Regain.com/UNCUTUNCENSORED today to get 10% off your first monthProduced by Dear MediaSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Everyone Comes From Somewhere
Introducing Everyone Comes From Somewhere

Everyone Comes From Somewhere

Play Episode Listen Later Sep 22, 2023 2:06


Join Dr. Jody Carrington for weekly episodes of insight, research, hilarity and some of the best guests on the planet. Together, we will explore just how amazing this human race is because Everyone Comes from Somewhere and we can't wait to find out where. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Empowered Relationship Podcast: Your Relationship Resource And Guide
ERP 387: How To Prioritize Reconnecting & Regulation In Relationship — An Interview With Dr. Jody Carrington

Empowered Relationship Podcast: Your Relationship Resource And Guide

Play Episode Listen Later Aug 29, 2023 58:35


In a world where technology offers countless ways to be connected, why is it that so many of us still feel disconnected? Why is it becoming increasingly difficult to forge deep, meaningful connections with others? In this episode, Dr. Jody Carrington and Dr. Jessica Higgins explore the intricacies of reconnecting and finding balance in relationships, along with the skill of nurturing genuine connections. Whether it's strengthening bonds with our children, partners, colleagues, or even within ourselves, they delve into the heart of building authentic relationships. From handling emotional challenges to embracing the significance of acknowledgment, they unravel the multifaceted nature of human interaction. So, if you're ready to peel back the layers of disconnection and embark on a journey towards reconnection, join us on this episode. Dr. Jody Carrington is a psychologist sought after for her expertise, energy, and approach to helping people solve their most complex human-centered challenges. Jody focuses much of her work around reconnection. Jody uses humor, and all she has learned in her twenty-year career as a psychologist to empower everyone she connects with. In her latest book, Feeling Seen, she dives into what it takes to reconnect a disconnected world. Check out the transcript of this episode on Dr. Jessica Higgin's website. In this episode 7:24 Dr. Jody Carrington's professional evolution: From first responders to child psychiatry. 15:55 The challenge of repairing relationships. 19:14 Building emotional language and regulation. 24:52 Identifying core motivators of disconnection in relationships. 30:52 The importance of acknowledging the various contributors to disconnection. 38:01 Indigenous teachings on land acknowledgment as a lesson in genuine bearing witness. 42:10 Fostering resilience in professionals to address the increasing emotional dysregulation in society. 53:28 Accessing Dr. Carrington's workshops and podcasts for accessible mental health conversations. Mentioned Teachers These Days: Stories and Strategies for Reconnection (*Amazon Affiliate link) (book) Kids These Days: A Game Plan For (Re)Connecting With Those We Teach, Lead, & Love (*Amazon Affiliate link) (book) Feeling Seen: Reconnecting in a Disconnected World (*Amazon Affiliate link) (book) Relationship Map To Happy, Lasting Love Connect with Dr. Jody Carrington Websites: drjodycarrington.com Facebook: facebook.com/drjodycarrington Twitter: twitter.com/DrJCarrington?s=20&t=6-oqtPKGW3zZnKeT0eI6Hg YouTube: youtube.com/c/drjodycarrington Instagram: instagram.com/drjodycarrington/?hl=en LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/dr-jody-carrington/?originalSubdomain=ca Connect with Dr. Jessica Higgins Facebook: facebook.com/EmpoweredRelationship  Instagram: instagram.com/drjessicahiggins  Podcast: drjessicahiggins.com/podcasts/ Pinterest: pinterest.com/EmpowerRelation  LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/drjessicahiggins  Twitter: @DrJessHiggins  Website: drjessicahiggins.com   Email: jessica@drjessicahiggins.com If you have a topic you would like me to discuss, please contact me by clicking on the “Ask Dr. Jessica Higgins” button here.  Thank you so much for your interest in improving your relationship.  Also, I would so appreciate your honest rating and review. Please leave a review by clicking here.  Thank you!   *With Amazon Affiliate Links, I may earn a few cents from Amazon, if you purchase the book from this link.

Beautiful Writers Podcast
Hal Elrod: Self-Pub Superstars, Part 1 of 2

Beautiful Writers Podcast

Play Episode Listen Later Aug 24, 2023 41:47


Ever feel like you need a miracle to realize your big dreams? Let me introduce you to my miraculous client and friend Hal Elrod, author of The Miracle Morning: The Not So Obvious Secret Guaranteed to Transform Your Life Before 8 AM. With over 3.5 million books sold, you'd think he'd have started with a top-five publisher. Instead, he launched a worldwide movement (the book series, a daily app, and a documentary featuring some of your heroes) on his own, self-publishing after his first two agent rejections! Say what? I'd just gotten started sending him out! But thankfully, Hal followed his instincts.It's been a show highlight for me to cover the topic of self-publishing—something I haven't yet done here. Stay tuned if you've ever thought you couldn't make a fortune being your own publisher. Hal (and Dr. Jody Carrington, the author in the second episode) have wildly exceeded anything I thought possible without a traditional publisher's support, earning millions of dollars and more importantly, having a massive impact. As you're about to hear, Hal has repeatedly stared death in the face, overcoming nearly insurmountable tragedy. But you wouldn't know it by his attitude or his gratitude. Luckily, his miraculous mindset is fast, fabulous, and, in many ways, foolproof. Welcome.

Beautiful Writers Podcast
Dr. Jody Carrington: Self-Pub Superstars, Part 2

Beautiful Writers Podcast

Play Episode Listen Later Aug 24, 2023 54:56


I can't with this soulmate client. I'm pressed for words to share how much I love this woman, author, and communicator. I promise you've never met anyone like Dr. Jody Carrington. I call her Canada's Brené Brown (mixed with some Jerry Seinfeld), so that's close. But, well. Just see for yourself.When I met Jody at one of my Carmel retreats at the start of her writing career, it only took two minutes to know that I was sitting with a superstar. I'd never before encouraged someone to forgo traditional publishing and run straight into self-publishing, but that was the vibe. Within months, Jody had sold so many pre-orders for Kids These Days: A Game Plan for (Re)Connecting with Those We Teach, Lead, & Love that she funded her first two printings. A quarter of a million books later and a second in the series (Teachers These Days: Stories and Strategies for Reconnection), Jody was approached by a top-five publisher for her latest book, Feeling Seen: Reconnecting in a Disconnected World.Jody is a mama, a wife, a speaker, and a connector. She's a first responder, the rare psychologist who cherishes going into schools AFTER a school shooting to soothe hearts and minds. Her capacity for caring for her people (and other people's people) is unending. Plus, she has the most delightful potty mouth while simultaneously making you laugh and cry. I could write my own book on her countless accomplishments and benefits, and I will. I want to get this posted now before a day of appointments. But for now, I'll close by saying that if you want to write, speak, and touch the masses, you couldn't be in better hands. Welcome.  

Change Starts Here, Presented by FranklinCovey Education
How to Lead in a Disconnected World

Change Starts Here, Presented by FranklinCovey Education

Play Episode Listen Later Aug 15, 2023 44:25


In the latest episode of the FranklinCovey Change Starts Here Podcast, host Dustin Odham welcomes back Dr. Jody Carrington, a world-renowned psychologist. The conversation delves into Dr. Carrington's new book, “Feeling Seen: Reconnecting in a Disconnected World,” and explores the concept of connection in an increasingly disconnected world. They discuss the power of shame, how to conquer it, and what to do when we lose our way and fall back into old habits. The episode also touches on the loneliness epidemic and the mental health crisis, emphasizing the importance of feeling seen and the need for reconnection.

Your Kick Ass Life Podcast
Episode 541: Creating Connection and Feeling Seen with Dr. Jody Carrington

Your Kick Ass Life Podcast

Play Episode Listen Later Jul 26, 2023 53:13


“We are wired for connection, but kindness, empathy, and connection is a skill we must learn,” says guest Dr. Jody Carrington. Dr. Jody is a renowned psychologist sought after for her expertise, energy, and approach to helping people solve their most complex human-centered challenges.   Dr. Jody joins me for a conversation about connection, understanding the purpose and power in acknowledgment and feeling seen, and how to find our way back to self and each other. I believe in Dr. Jody's work and hope you enjoy our conversation! In fact, I will leave you with another powerful statement from Dr. Jody, “We are wired to do the hard things, but we were never meant to do any of this alone.” Featured Topics:  Why connection and reconnection are so important in the world right now (5:16) Acknowledgment and feeling seen is the answer to everything (16:37) Emotions will not kill you, but not talking about them might (24:44) How to reconnect and find our way back to each other (33:32) Creating an emotional language with the people (38:36) Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices