The Good Mood Clinic Podcast

Send us a textWhen your heart wants closeness but your “old map” keeps pulling you toward distance, you're stuck in the Catch-22 of attraction. In this episode, Gemma explains how early schemas quietly shape who you're drawn to, why “chemistry” so often points you toward the familiar (not the healthy), and what it takes to consciously rewrite your Love Template so you can choose emotionally available partners.In this episode, you'll learnWhat a schema is (quick primer) and why it's more useful than attachment boxesHow the Abandonment schema fuels anxious preoccupation, magical thinking, and self-fulfilling patternsWhy Emotional Deprivation normalises giving a lot while rarely feeling seen or nurturedHow Defectiveness/Shame covertly lowers your standards and tolerates poor treatmentThe role of Subjugation and Self-Sacrifice in silencing yourself early, then staying too longWhy attraction isn't random and how your Love Template (old map) picks partners for you on autopilotThe Healthy Adult shift: moving from familiar chemistry to choosing steady, emotionally available partnersKey takeawaysAttraction pulls toward what's familiar, not necessarily what's good.“I'll just go with the flow” keeps you on autopilot; intentional dating rewrites the outcome.Knowledge is power BUT applied knowledge (with guidance) is transformation.Your patterns in romance often ripple into career, friendships, and self-worth, change one, and others shift.Try this this weekName your top 1–2 schemas you hear in this episode.Write one “Healthy Adult” decision you'll make before your next date (e.g., “If communication is inconsistent in the first 2 weeks, I'll opt out kindly and early”).List 3 signals of emotional availability you'll move toward (e.g., follow-through, steady pace, repair after missteps).Resources & next stepsFree Live Masterclass - The Psychology of Attraction Wednesday, 10 September 2025 at 7:00 pm AEST (replay available for a few days).  ▶︎ Register HereLove Wisely - 12-Week Live Group Coaching (Sept cohort) Enrolments open Wednesday, 10 September 2025 at ~7:45 pm AEST for 7 days. Max 25 women.  ▶︎ Learn moreSupport the show✨ Connect with Me

Send us a textIn this episode I answer a listener Q from “Maddie,” who's in post-breakup limbo with an avoidant ex. I unpack blurred boundaries after a breakup, why “staying friends” can quietly erode self-respect, how trauma bonds differ from schema-triggered dynamics, and what it really takes to let go when your abandonment schema is pulling you back. You'll also get a simple Relationship Review exercise to spot your patterns so you can date with clearer self-trust next time.What we coverThe self-respect signal: why “staying friends” sometimes keeps you stuckLove-bombing vs. real intimacy (and why early declarations are a red flag)Trauma bonding 101: replication, familiarity and unmet needsAvoidant–anxious dynamics and why they feel magnetic but unstable“Hard work” vs. “healthy work” in relationships - a practical litmus testHow to let go: grief, no-contact, and naming your modes without self-criticismThe Relationship Review: a step-by-step way to map your patternsTry this (listener worksheet prompts)“Where did I override red flags because of fear, guilt or hope?”“Which parts/modes showed up in me (e.g., Pleaser, Angry Protector, Vulnerable Child)?”“How did I actually feel most of the time in that relationship?”“What does ‘emotionally available' need to look like for me, specifically?”Resources mentionedEpisode 104: The Good, the Bad and the Bond (trauma bonding explainer)Free guide: Dating With Insight: A Tune-In After Every Date (reflective prompts to help you notice how you felt in their presence)Free live masterclass: The Psychology of Attraction - why chemistry isn't random and how schema chemistry pulls you toward the wrong partnersLive: Wednesday 10 September, 7:00pm AESTReplay available to all who registerIs Love Wisely for you? If you're a self-aware woman with a history of emotionally unavailable or narcissistic partners AND you're ready to rewrite your Love Template™ the next 12-week Love Wisely group starts late September. Warm, structured and practical. Support the show✨ Connect with Me

Send us a textWhy do caring, empathic women end up doing the heavy lifting in love, staying out of guilt and “rescuing” partners at the expense of their own needs? In this episode, Gemma unpacks the unconscious pull to fix others, how childhood patterns (self-sacrifice, subjugation, emotional deprivation) set the stage, and the real cost of over-functioning. You'll learn how to shift from “fixer” to “feeler,” build healthy entitlement, and make self-supporting choices, even when guilt shouts loudly.Key TakeawaysRescuing often masks self-abandonment learned in childhood; guilt can keep you stuck. “Too much empathy” without objective distance leads to empathic distress and burnout. Ask: Am I a partner or a parent/therapist/saviour in this dynamic?Build healthy entitlement: your needs matter and boundaries are an act of care. Shift from fixing them to feeling you: journal, re-parent, seek support, and challenge all-or-nothing beliefs. Try This (Journal Prompts)“If I weren't rescuing here, what feelings in me would surface?”“What belief equates caring for myself with hurting someone else?”“Where did I first learn that love = self-sacrifice?”“What would healthy reciprocity look like this week (one tangible boundary)?”Resources MentionedFree Live Masterclass (Sept 10) – The Psychology of Attraction: Why We Bond with Emotionally Unavailable Men (replay available).Work with Gemma – Coaching & the Love Wisely program (for women ready to rewrite their love template).Rate & Review If this helped you, a quick review on Apple or Spotify helps other women find the show. Thank you for being part of this work.Support the show✨ Connect with Me

Send us a text Every past relationship leaves clues. Patterns you've fallen into. The kinds of people you're drawn to. The roles you find yourself playing without even realising it.In this episode of Healing for Love, I'm walking you through 6 powerful reflection questions to help you see your love life more clearly and prepare you to approach dating in a new way.These are the same questions I explore with my Love Wisely clients, because when you understand your patterns, you can finally break them.The 6 Questions: 1️⃣ What patterns keep showing up? 2️⃣ What ‘types' of partners are you drawn to? 3️⃣ What deeper patterns (schemas) might be playing out? 4️⃣ What role did you take on? 5️⃣ What did you tolerate that you wouldn't today? 6️⃣ What red flags did you see but explained away?This isn't about blame! Don't get self-critical or judgmental, this is just about clarity. Because clarity is the first step to creating a different future in love.

Send us a text Have you ever looked back at a relationship and thought, “Why didn't I walk away sooner?” You're not alone — and it's not about weakness or denial. In this episode, Dr. Gemma Gladstone explores seven powerful psychological reasons we tend to ignore red flags in relationships — especially in the early stages.Drawing on schema therapy, attachment theory, and decades of clinical experience, Gemma breaks down why patterns like schema chemistry, abandonment fears, self-doubt, and people-pleasing keep us stuck in emotionally harmful dynamics — even when we know something feels off.Whether you're dating, in a relationship, or reflecting on the past, this episode offers deep insight and gentle guidance to help you recognize what's really going on beneath the surface.You'll learn:What schema chemistry is — and how it hijacks your attraction radarWhy self-doubt and schemas like defectiveness or dependence make it hard to trust yourselfThe role of the abandonment schema in keeping you hookedHow emotional deprivation creates low expectations in loveWhy people-pleasing, guilt, and over-responsibility make it hard to leaveWhat it means to rewire your “love template”How to start showing up for yourself in new waysMentioned in this episode:The Red Flag Project Course — our online course to help you break toxic patterns and spot red flags earlyLove Wisely Group Coaching — now closed for enrollment. Join the waitlist here for the next round starting September 2025✨ Reminder: If this episode resonates with you, follow the show and share it with someone who needs to hear it.Let's break the cycle — together.Support the show

Send us a textMeet Sophie, a 37-year-old woman who spent years feeling stuck in painful relationship cycles. Like many women I work with, she kept attracting emotionally unavailable or narcissistic men — despite knowing, deep down, that something wasn't right.In this episode, I'll walk you through Sophie's journey: from identifying her relational schemas (like abandonment, emotional deprivation, and subjugation), to understanding how her childhood shaped her “love template,” to the powerful moment she made a clear commitment to change.We'll explore how she:Finally ended a 7-year relationship that drained her emotionallyIdentified red flags and stopped rationalising harmRebuilt self-trust by healing her inner vulnerable childLet go of the idea that she had a specific “type”Started dating with emotional clarity, rather than fear or old patternsThis transformation is exactly the kind of work we do inside Love Wisely. If you've ever asked yourself “Why do I keep ending up in the same kind of relationship?” — this episode is for you.Support the show

Send us a textIn this important solo episode, Gemma reflects on a disturbing real-life conversation overheard between two teenage girls — one of whom casually describes being physically assaulted by her boyfriend. What follows is a powerful deep dive into why girls and women downplay harmful, even abusive, behaviour in relationships.From shame, trauma bonding, and fear of judgement to deeply rooted schemas like abandonment, defectiveness, and subjugation, Gemma explores the internal and social forces that keep so many women stuck — and why prevention, education, and early recognition matter more than ever.What You'll Learn:Why some girls and women minimize abusive behaviour, even when it's clearly unsafeThe role of schemas (especially abandonment and shame) in tolerating harmHow early emotional wounds shape our dating choices and instinctsWhat trauma bonding is — and how it makes us rationalize abuseKey psychological and cultural reasons why walking away feels so hardWhy we must start taking early signs seriously — for ourselves and the next generationGemma also shares practical reflection prompts, including:What would I tell my younger self?What would I say to a friend in this situation?

Send us a textIn this solo episode, Gemma explores one of the most foundational concepts when it comes to healing relationship patterns—the abandonment schema.Whether you're currently dating or in a long-term relationship, understanding your own abandonment schema and how it influences your emotions, choices, and reactions is essential for cultivating emotional safety and secure connection.Gemma explains:What the abandonment schema is and how it developsHow it shows up in dating and relationships (from clingy overcompensation to total avoidance)The 3 common coping styles triggered by this schema—and how they quietly sabotage your love lifeWhy working with your vulnerable child mode is key to healing the abandonment wound3 powerful reparenting practices to begin calming your inner alarm system and making more grounded, self-honoring choices in loveSupport the showLove Wisely. Something new from Gemma - Express your interest or find out more about joining a special founding round of my new group program - Love Wisely. You can express your interest here. Help support our continued production. Are you a regular listener who loves our show? Consider supporting us with a contribution each month to help us keep going!

Send us a textThe Red Flag Project – Learn how to break free from toxic relationship patterns – theredflagproject.comSchema Coaching & Support – Work with Dr. Gemma GladstoneSupport the showLove Wisely. Something new from Gemma - Express your interest or find out more about joining a special founding round of my new group program - Love Wisely. You can express your interest here. Help support our continued production. Are you a regular listener who loves our show? Consider supporting us with a contribution each month to help us keep going!

Send us a textIn this mailbox episode, we dive into a listener question from Amy (name changed for privacy), who is struggling with the trauma bond with her narcissistic and emotionally neglectful mother. Amy shares her experience of emotional neglect, manipulation, gaslighting, and rejection—all while navigating the complicated reality of trying to maintain boundaries.Drs. Gemma and Justine discuss: ✔ What a trauma bond with a parent looks like – Why it's so difficult to break free ✔ The cycle of hope & rejection – Why emotionally neglectful parents keep you in a state of longing ✔ How narcissistic parents offload their shame onto their children – Understanding the “shame exchange” ✔ Why boundaries feel impossible with a narcissistic mother – The emotional toll of walking on eggshells ✔ Grief and healing – The painful but necessary process of accepting that your mother will never be the mother you needed ✔ Moving forward – Why reparenting yourself is key, and how to start choosing healthier relationshipsThis is a deeply validating episode for anyone struggling with a difficult or narcissistic parent. If you've ever felt stuck in an unhealthy dynamic, confused by your mother's inconsistent behavior, or burdened with guilt for setting boundaries, this discussion is for you.

Send us a textIn this episode, Dr Gemma takes a deep dive into one of the most common and persistent life patterns—people-pleasing. If you've ever found yourself constantly prioritizing others' needs over your own, struggling to say no, or feeling exhausted from always trying to keep the peace, this episode is for you.She explores:✅ What people-pleasing really is and why it's not just one behavior but a collection of patterns ✅ The three main schemas that drive people-pleasing ✅ How early experiences and conditioning shape this pattern and why it can be hard to break ✅ Six powerful self-reflection questions to help you tune into yourself, your needs and your emotionsThese six foundational questions are designed to help you:

Send us a textEpisode Description:Are you dating someone new and wondering if they're truly a good match? Or do you have a pattern of attracting emotionally unavailable or narcissistic partners? In this episode, Gemma breaks down The 7 Deadly Sins of the Narcissistic Dater—key warning signs that indicate deeper personality issues and potential toxic relationship dynamics.These signs often reveal themselves early—sometimes even on the first date. Recognizing them before you get emotionally invested can save you from heartbreak and manipulation.These behaviors aren't just annoying quirks—they're significant predictors of toxic relationship patterns. I also share 2 real success stories from women who've identified these red flags early, broken their old patterns, and found secure, emotionally available partners.Resources Mentioned in This Episode:

Hi, Do you have a question for us? Ask away!Episode Overview:In this engaging Q&A episode, Dr. Gemma Gladstone answers two listener questions, diving into the nuances of emotional availability in relationships and managing complex dynamics with a narcissistic parent.Key Topics Covered:Emotional Availability in RelationshipsHow to assess emotional availability beyond just words like "I love you."Why actions, consistency, and reliability are key indicators of emotional connection.Navigating personal triggers while building a secure relationship.Dealing with a Narcissistic ParentSupporting a partner who is enmeshed with a controlling or manipulative parent.Setting healthy boundaries and fostering autonomy without becoming the "fixer."How schema therapy offers insight into narcissistic family dynamics and coping strategies.This episode offers relatable insights for anyone navigating relationship challenges or family complexities. Whether you're questioning emotional availability in a partner or dealing with a narcissistic parent, Dr. Gemma provides practical advice, grounded in schema therapy, to help you move forward.Healthy relationships are built on emotional availability, mutual respect, and consistent actions. Understanding the deeper dynamics in family or romantic relationships can empower you to set boundaries, support yourself and others, and foster meaningful connections.Support the showCan you help support our continued production. If you're a regular listener who loves our show, consider supporting us with a contribution each month. We are a home-grown podcast made with love, without help from a fancy production company or sponsors. Become a supporter of the show and help us keep going!SPECIAL OFFER ON GEMMA'S WEBINAR FOR THERAPISTS - FAST30FEB - GET LINK, ENDS FEB 28TH (Therapeutic Strategies for Assisting Clients with Narcissistic Parents). CONNECT WITH USGood Mood Hubgoodmood.com.auInstagramFacebookemail: justineandgemma@goodmood.com.auContact us for information about private coaching with Gemma or Justine. The Red Flag Projecttheredflagproject.comInstagramFacebookemail: hello@theredflagproject.comhttps://linktr.ee/theredflagprojectFor women seeking to heal their s...

Hi, Do you have a question for us? Ask away!Episode Overview:In this deeply personal and insightful episode, Dr. Justine Corry shares her experience of family estrangement, reflecting on her relationship with a narcissistic mother and the impact on her life. Dr. Gemma Gladstone joins the conversation as they both discuss the psychological toll of estrangement and how schema therapy can help individuals heal and move forward.Key Topics Covered:What drives estrangement and why it's never an easy decision.The role of schemas in shaping family dynamics and coping mechanisms.Personal reflections on living without a parent and how to navigate the associated grief and loss.Understanding the motivations and limitations of difficult family members, including narcissistic parents.How self-preservation and boundaries can lead to healing and healthier relationships.If you've ever struggled with a difficult family relationship, faced the possibility of estrangement, or want to better understand the psychology behind toxic family dynamics, this episode provides both professional guidance and heartfelt relatability.Estrangement is never easy, but understanding the dynamics at play can help bring clarity and healing. With the right tools and support, it's possible to move forward and build a life that aligns with your well-being.Support the showCan you help support our continued production. If you're a regular listener who loves our show, consider supporting us with a contribution each month. We are a home-grown podcast made with love, without help from a fancy production company or sponsors. Become a supporter of the show and help us keep going!SPECIAL OFFER ON GEMMA'S WEBINAR FOR THERAPISTS - FAST30FEB - GET LINK, ENDS FEB 28TH (Therapeutic Strategies for Assisting Clients with Narcissistic Parents). CONNECT WITH USGood Mood Hubgoodmood.com.auInstagramFacebookemail: justineandgemma@goodmood.com.auContact us for information about private coaching with Gemma or Justine. The Red Flag Projecttheredflagproject.comInstagramFacebookemail: hello@theredflagproject.comhttps://linktr.ee/theredflagprojectFor women seeking to heal their s...

Hi, Do you have a question for us? Ask away!Happy New Year! In this first episode of 2025, Gemma invites you to reflect on the life scripts and recurring patterns that no longer serve you and take intentional steps toward rewriting them. Life scripts are the unconscious stories and patterns that shape how we think, feel, and behave, often holding us back from living authentically and joyfully.By unpacking and letting go of these outdated narratives, we create space for personal growth, healthier relationships, and a life aligned with our true selves.In This Episode, Gemma Discusses:What Are Life Scripts?How they differ from schemas and influence our decisions and behaviors.Examples of common life scripts, such as people-pleasing, perfectionism, and self-doubt.The Connection Between Life Scripts and Schemas:How schemas like abandonment, defectiveness, and unrelenting standards often underpin these scripts.Three Common Life Scripts:People-Pleasing: "I need to make everyone happy to be loved."Perfectionism: "If I don't do this perfectly, I'm not good enough."Self-Doubt: "I'm not capable or as good as others."How to Let Go of Limiting Life Scripts:Identify the Script: Recognize the recurring patterns or schemas that are holding you back.Visualize Change: Imagine life without the script—what would it look like?Create a Mantra: Use affirmations to focus your intention and remind yourself of your growth.Take Small Steps: Start with achievable actions, like setting a boundary or reframing a critical thought.Real-Life Examples:Gemma shares powerful success stories of clients who rewrote their scripts and transformed their lives.As we begin 2025, this episode is your invitation to reflect, reset, and take steps toward letting go of the old scripts holding you back.P.S. If you're ready to go deeper and tackle your life scripts with focused 1:1 coaching, Gemma has limited spots available for new clients. Reach out at reception@goodmood.com.au to enquire. Support the showCan you help support our continued production. If you're a regular listener who loves our show, please consider supporting us with a small contribution each month. We are a home-grown podcast made with love, without help from a fancy production company or sponsors. Become a regular supporter of the show and get a big thank-you shout out on an upcoming episode. Help us keep going! xxCONNECT WITH USGood Mood Hubgoodmood.com.auInstagramFacebookemail: justineandgemma@goodmood.com.auEmail us for information about private therapy or coaching with Dr Gemma or Dr Justine. The Red Flag Projecttheredflagproject.comInstagramFacebookemail: hello@theredflagproject.comhttps://linktr.ee/theredflagprojectFor women seeking to heal their schemas, break free from negative relationship patterns and avoid red-flag relationships. See our website for coaching with Gemma or Justine.

Hi, Do you have a question for us? Ask away!Welcome to the final Episode for this year!  We will be back with new episodes in 2025.  Support the showCan you help support our continued production. If you're a regular listener who loves our show, please consider supporting us with a small contribution each month. We are a home-grown podcast made with love, without help from a fancy production company or sponsors. Become a regular supporter of the show and get a big thank-you shout out on an upcoming episode. Help us keep going! xxCONNECT WITH USGood Mood Hubgoodmood.com.auInstagramFacebookemail: justineandgemma@goodmood.com.auEmail us for information about private therapy or coaching with Dr Gemma or Dr Justine. The Red Flag Projecttheredflagproject.comInstagramFacebookemail: hello@theredflagproject.comhttps://linktr.ee/theredflagprojectFor women seeking to heal their schemas, break free from negative relationship patterns and avoid red-flag relationships. See our website for coaching with Gemma or Justine.

Hi, Do you have a question for us? Ask away!In this episode of we dive deep into the "martyr mode," a coping style often discussed in schema therapy. We explore what it means to have a martyr complex or mode, how it shows up in relationships, and the emotional dynamics that fuel this behaviour.Key topics covered include:The defining traits of the martyr mode and how it may stem from deeper emotional wounds, unmet needs and emotional deprivation.The guilt-inducing and manipulative aspects of martyr behaviour, and its impact on relationships with children, partners, and others.How this mode can flip between seeking validation, playing the victim, and striving for indispensability.Insights into the covert ways martyrs seek emotional control and validation, often leaving others feeling resentful or guilty.Practical advice for recognizing and addressing martyr tendencies in yourself or dealing with someone exhibiting this behavior.Whether you're navigating a relationship with someone in this mode or noticing these patterns within yourself, this episode offers valuable insights and strategies for creating healthier dynamics.If you enjoyed this episode, don't forget to FOLLOW the show and share it with others who might benefit from this discussion.Support the showCan you help support our continued production. If you're a regular listener who loves our show, please consider supporting us with a small contribution each month. We are a home-grown podcast made with love, without help from a fancy production company or sponsors. Become a regular supporter of the show and get a big thank-you shout out on an upcoming episode. Help us keep going! xxCONNECT WITH USGood Mood Hubgoodmood.com.auInstagramFacebookemail: justineandgemma@goodmood.com.auEmail us for information about private therapy or coaching with Dr Gemma or Dr Justine. The Red Flag Projecttheredflagproject.comInstagramFacebookemail: hello@theredflagproject.comhttps://linktr.ee/theredflagprojectFor women seeking to heal their schemas, break free from negative relationship patterns and avoid red-flag relationships. See our website for coaching with Gemma or Justine.

Hi, Do you have a question for us? Ask away!Healthy Adult Daily Practice: An Intentional Reflection ToolIn this episode, Gemma introduces a practical tool called Healthy Adult Daily Practice, designed to help you strengthen and nurture your Healthy Adult mode. Building on the foundational features of the Healthy Adult mode discussed in the previous episode, this episode walks you through a simple, intentional practice that can be integrated into your daily life to promote emotional resilience, self-awareness, and healthier relationships.What You'll Learn in This Episode:What is the Healthy Adult Mode?A quick recap of its foundational characteristics: mindfulness, self-compassion, emotional regulation, and more.How embodying the Healthy Adult mode supports wiser, more compassionate decision-making and self-management.Healthy Adult Daily Practice Tool:Set Your Intention: Choose one Healthy Adult quality (e.g., patience, empathy, gratitude, self-care) to focus on for the day.Daily Embodiment: Actively embody this quality in your actions, thoughts, and interactions throughout the day.End-of-Day Reflection: Evaluate how you embodied this quality, reflect on challenges, and identify lessons learned for future growth.Why This Practice Works:The importance of intentionality and repetition in developing new neural pathways.How this practice builds emotional resilience and integrates Healthy Adult traits into your personality over time.By engaging with this tool, you'll build greater self-awareness, foster healthier relationships, and develop the emotional resilience to face life's challenges with confidence and clarity.Reflection Questions for Healthy Adult Daily Practice:What Healthy Adult quality will I focus on tomorrow?Why is this quality meaningful or important to me right now?How do I plan to incorporate this quality into my daily life?How did I embody this quality today?What challenges did I face in practicing this quality?How did this practice influence my interactions, decisions, or emotions?Support the showCan you help support our continued production. If you're a regular listener who loves our show, please consider supporting us with a small contribution each month. We are a home-grown podcast made with love, without help from a fancy production company or sponsors. Become a regular supporter of the show and get a big thank-you shout out on an upcoming episode. Help us keep going! xxCONNECT WITH USGood Mood Hubgoodmood.com.auInstagramFacebookemail: justineandgemma@goodmood.com.auEmail us for information about private therapy or coaching with Dr Gemma or Dr Justine. The Red Flag Projecttheredflagproject.comInstagramFacebookemail: hello@theredflagproject.comhttps://linktr.ee/theredflagprojectFor women seeking to heal their schemas, break free from negative relationship patterns and avoid red-flag relationships. See our website for coaching with Gemma or Justine.

Hi, Do you have a question for us? Ask away!In this episode, Gemma dives into the cornerstone of schema therapy: the Healthy Adult mode. This is the part of us that represents balance, wisdom, and compassion—our best self that helps us navigate relationships, emotions, and life's challenges effectively.What You'll Learn:Mindfulness: Why mindfulness is the foundational building block for self-awareness, self-reflection, and personal growth.The Healthy Adult as Executor: How this mode acts as the caretaker, director, and overseer of all other modes.The Wise and Courageous Self: The importance of facing reality, leaning into discomfort, and making wise, courageous decisions.The Compassionate Self: How to practice genuine compassion toward yourself and others without overextending or self-sacrificing.The Good Parent: Prioritizing meaningful self-care and addressing unhealthy coping strategies to nurture yourself like a loving parent would.Self-Awareness and Growth: Recognizing your schemas and embracing psychological awareness to create meaningful change.Flexibility and Openness: Developing an open, adaptable mindset to navigate life's ups and downs without rigidity.Why This Episode Matters:Understanding and strengthening your Healthy Adult mode is central to breaking unhelpful patterns and living authentically. Gemma shares practical insights and strategies to help you embrace this transformative aspect of yourself.Resources Mentioned:Book recommendation: Reinventing Your Life by Jeffrey Young.Previous episode: "You're Not Your Diagnosis."Support the showCan you help support our continued production. If you're a regular listener who loves our show, please consider supporting us with a small contribution each month. We are a home-grown podcast made with love, without help from a fancy production company or sponsors. Become a regular supporter of the show and get a big thank-you shout out on an upcoming episode. Help us keep going! xxCONNECT WITH USGood Mood Hubgoodmood.com.auInstagramFacebookemail: justineandgemma@goodmood.com.auEmail us for information about private therapy or coaching with Dr Gemma or Dr Justine. The Red Flag Projecttheredflagproject.comInstagramFacebookemail: hello@theredflagproject.comhttps://linktr.ee/theredflagprojectFor women seeking to heal their schemas, break free from negative relationship patterns and avoid red-flag relationships. See our website for coaching with Gemma or Justine.

Hi, Do you have a question for us? Ask away!In this solo episode, Gemma dives deep into the concept of trauma bonding, shedding light on why some people feel emotionally tethered to unhealthy or toxic relationships. Drawing from listener questions she explores the psychological mechanisms behind trauma bonds, including the powerful dynamic of the "good-bad ratio" and how it can replicate patterns from childhood.Gemma also discusses how schemas—such as abandonment, mistrust/abuse, and defectiveness—can make individuals more vulnerable to trauma bonding and highlights the role of manipulative behaviors like love bombing, gaslighting, and boundary-pushing in these relationships.If you've ever wondered why it's so hard to leave a toxic relationship or felt stuck in cycles of abuse, this episode is essential listening. Topics Covered:What is a Trauma Bond? How emotional connections form in abusive or toxic relationships.The Abuse Cycle: Key stages like love bombing, boundary-pushing, and manipulation that create and reinforce trauma bonds.The Role of Schemas: Why unresolved schemas, such as abandonment or mistrust/abuse, make it harder to leave.Breaking the Cycle: How understanding the "good-bad ratio" in relationships can help you regain clarity and self-worth.Red Flags to Watch For: Love bombing, arrogance, and other warning signs of toxic relationships.How to Heal: The importance of schema work, slowing down in relationships, and taking steps toward self-reflection and recovery.Additional Resources:If you're ready to explore this further, check out Breaking Free From Love-Traps, a self-paced mini-course that unpacks why we're drawn to certain partners and how to break free from unhealthy patterns. Visit The Red Flag Project for more details.Support the showCan you help support our continued production. If you're a regular listener who loves our show, please consider supporting us with a small contribution each month. We are a home-grown podcast made with love, without help from a fancy production company or sponsors. Become a regular supporter of the show and get a big thank-you shout out on an upcoming episode. Help us keep going! xxCONNECT WITH USGood Mood Hubgoodmood.com.auInstagramFacebookemail: justineandgemma@goodmood.com.auEmail us for information about private therapy or coaching with Dr Gemma or Dr Justine. The Red Flag Projecttheredflagproject.comInstagramFacebookemail: hello@theredflagproject.comhttps://linktr.ee/theredflagprojectFor women seeking to heal their schemas, break free from negative relationship patterns and avoid red-flag relationships. See our website for coaching with Gemma or Justine.

Hi, Do you have a question for us? Ask away!This episode will resonate with anyone struggling with an overdeveloped sense of responsibility to others and those who feel “stuck” in cycles of overgiving. In this solo episode, Gemma dives deep into the self-sacrifice schema, exploring how it manifests, its origins in family dynamics, and the toll it takes on those who constantly prioritize others over themselves. This schema, often seen in people who struggle with setting boundaries, can lead to burnout, resentment, and a diminished sense of self-worth.Gemma delves into the drama triangle—the roles of victim, rescuer, and persecutor—and explains how these dynamics often shape and reinforce the self-sacrifice schema. Additionally, she examines the enmeshment schema, which often appears alongside self-sacrifice, further complicating one's ability to differentiate personal needs from the needs of others.Topics covered include:Defining the Self-Sacrifice Schema: How it drives people to prioritize others' needs over their own, even to their detriment.Origins of the Schema: Common family dynamics that foster self-sacrifice, such as growing up with an over-entitled or narcissistic parent, or being cast into the rescuer role in the drama triangle.The Schema's Impact on Relationships: Why those with a strong self-sacrifice schema often attract self-absorbed partners and struggle to set boundaries.Enmeshment and Self-Sacrifice: How enmeshment can fuel self-sacrifice by creating a sense of responsibility for others' emotions and well-being.Schemas and Coping Styles: Different coping modes, including surrendering to, avoiding, or overcompensating for the schema.The Role of Guilt and Empathic Distress: How these emotions fuel self-sacrifice behaviors and make it difficult to prioritize self-care.Practical Exercises: Techniques like chair work to identify core beliefs tied to self-sacrifice and to build a healthier relationship with oneself.Support the showCan you help support our continued production. If you're a regular listener who loves our show, please consider supporting us with a small contribution each month. We are a home-grown podcast made with love, without help from a fancy production company or sponsors. Become a regular supporter of the show and get a big thank-you shout out on an upcoming episode. Help us keep going! xxCONNECT WITH USGood Mood Hubgoodmood.com.auInstagramFacebookemail: justineandgemma@goodmood.com.auEmail us for information about private therapy or coaching with Dr Gemma or Dr Justine. The Red Flag Projecttheredflagproject.comInstagramFacebookemail: hello@theredflagproject.comhttps://linktr.ee/theredflagprojectFor women seeking to heal their schemas, break free from negative relationship patterns and avoid red-flag relationships. See our website for coaching with Gemma or Justine.

Hi, Do you have a question for us? Ask away!New Group Coaching Program: "Date Differently": A 6-week online group coaching program designed to help women build self-trust, set boundaries, and date with confidence. Starts November 6th. SIGN UP BEFORE 26TH OCT AND SAVE! Spots are limited. Signature Course – The Red Flag Project: This newly updated course covers schemas, red flags, and how to recognize unavailable partners. It's recommended to take the course before joining the coaching program to get the most out of the sessions. Access it here.  Special limited time discount code: HERBESTLIFEGet the FREE GUIDE - Dating with an abandonment schema Support the show

Hi, Do you have a question for us? Ask away!New Group Coaching Program: "Date Differently": A 6-week online group coaching program designed to help women build self-trust, set boundaries, and date with confidence. Starts November 6th. SIGN UP BEFORE 26TH OCT AND SAVE! Spots are limited. Signature Course – The Red Flag Project: This newly updated course covers schemas, red flags, and how to recognize unavailable partners. It's recommended to take the course before joining the coaching program to get the most out of the sessions. Access it here.  Special limited time discount code: HERBESTLIFEGet the FREE GUIDE - Dating with an abandonment schemaIn this episode, Gemma explores the emotional and psychological barriers that often arise when dating. Whether you're re-entering the dating scene or currently navigating it, this episode will help you identify and manage common sources of anxiety.Topics discussed:Fear of rejection or judgmentPressure to make a good impressionAttachment styles and schemasOverthinking and self-criticismFear of repeating past patternsCultural and societal expectationsUncertainty of the unknownPhysical and mental effects of anxietyThroughout the episode, Gemma offers mindset shifts and practical tips to help you feel more calm, confident, and authentic in your dating journey.How to Connect for relationship & dating content:Website: The Red Flag ProjectEmail: JustineandGemma@goomood.com.auInstagram: theredflagprojectofficialSupport the show

Hi, Do you have a question for us? Ask away!Exciting Announcement - Join Our New Group Coaching ProgramExciting News: Join Our New Group Coaching Program for Women – Date Differently - Secure your place now - SIGN UP BY 26TH OCT AND SAVE!  Come and join us live for six 90-min group sessions designed to revamp your approach to dating and get you feeling hopeful & confident again!  Plus added bonuses. Summary - Introducing our new 6-week online group coaching program for women called Date Differently.  If you're navigating the complexities of dating, struggling with emotionally unavailable partners, or feeling triggered by past patterns, this supportive group coaching experience is designed for you.The Date Differently program will draw from material in our signature course, The Red Flag Project, which has recently been revamped with new content. This course, hosted on wearebesties.com, covers essential topics like schemas, red flags, and how to avoid emotionally unavailable partners. For anyone joining the Date Differently program, we highly recommends completing the course beforehand (or alongside the group coaching) to get the most out of the sessions.Key Takeaways:Date Differently is a 6-week program starting 6th November, created to help women navigate the dating world with more confidence and self-trust.The group sessions will focus on schemas that affect relationship choices, identifying red flags, and making healthier decisions when dating.The Red Flag Project course is an essential companion to the coaching program, providing deeper insights into emotional unavailability and dating patterns.How to Join:Date Differently - Group Coaching Program: For more information or to sign up for Date Differently.   SIGN UP BEFORE 26TH OCT AND SAVE!The Red Flag Project Course: Access the newly revamped course on wearebesties.com/courses. A special discount code is available for a limited time (coupon is HERBESTLIFE).Instagram: theredflagprojectofficialSupport the show

Hi, Do you have a question for us? Ask away!Special Announcements:New Group Coaching Program: "Date Differently": A 6-week online group coaching program designed to help women build self-trust, set boundaries, and date with confidence. Starts November 6th. SIGN UP BEFORE 26TH OCT AND SAVE!Signature Course – The Red Flag Project: This newly updated course covers schemas, red flags, and how to recognize unavailable partners. It's recommended to take the course before joining the coaching program to get the most out of the sessions. Access it here.  Special limited time discount code: HERBESTLIFEHow to Connect for relationship & dating content:Website: The Red Flag ProjectEmail: JustineandGemma@goomood.com.auInstagram: theredflagprojectofficialSummary: In this episode, Gemma and Justine explore how the Abandonment Schema impacts dating and relationships. They discuss the core beliefs tied to this schema, such as the fear of being left or replaced, and how it can cause anxiety and insecurity even in the early stages of dating. They dive into how the schema is often triggered by ambiguity in communication, delayed responses, or inconsistent behavior from partners, and how these triggers can lead to overthinking and self-doubt.They also share practical tips for dating more mindfully with an Abandonment Schema, including identifying red flags early, managing emotional triggers, and setting healthy boundaries to avoid staying in unfulfilling relationships for too long.Key Takeaways:The Abandonment Schema can make dating feel unstable and trigger fears of rejection or being left behind, even when it's not warranted.It's essential to recognize early signs of emotional unavailability and avoid getting stuck in relationships that reinforce old patterns.Learn to manage triggers and address abandonment fears through self-awareness, setting boundaries, and focusing on your own needs and well-being.Support the show

Hi, Do you have a question for us? Ask away!Special Announcements:New Group Coaching Program: "Date Differently": A 6-week online group coaching program designed to help women build self-trust, set boundaries, and date with confidence. Starts November 6th. SIGN UP BEFORE 26TH OCT AND SAVE!Signature Course – The Red Flag Project: This newly updated course covers schemas, red flags, and how to recognize unavailable partners. It's recommended to take the course before joining the coaching program to get the most out of the sessions. Access it here.  Special limited time discount code: HERBESTLIFEHow to Connect for relationship & dating content:Website: The Red Flag ProjectEmail: JustineandGemma@goomood.com.auInstagram: theredflagprojectofficialSummary: In this replay of a popular episode, Gemma and Justine discuss the often-exhausting experience of dating fatigue. They explore why dating can feel so draining, particularly when navigating dating apps, dealing with rejection, or repeatedly encountering emotionally unavailable partners. Whether you're re-entering the dating world after a long-term relationship or have faced a series of short-term connections that haven't worked out, this episode offers helpful insights into handling the ups and downs of dating.Gemma and Justine emphasize the importance of social support and authenticity in dating, encouraging listeners to remain grounded and true to themselves. They also dive into common dating mistakes, such as ignoring red flags or putting on personas to appear "perfect" or easygoing. They remind listeners that staying true to yourself is key to building lasting, meaningful connections.Key Takeaways:Understanding Dating Fatigue: It's normal to feel exhausted or discouraged when dating, especially after repeated disappointments or endless swiping on apps. Acknowledge that dating can be a "numbers game," but also treat it as an experiment to learn about yourself and others.Be Yourself: Avoid putting on a persona or hiding your needs to please someone else. Authenticity is essential, as it leads to attracting partners who value the real you.Recognizing Red Flags Early: Pay attention to early signs of emotional unavailability, such as inconsistent communication or avoidance of meeting in person. Spotting these red flags early can help you avoid wasting time on people who aren't right for you.Self-Reflection: When dating, reflect on how you're feeling in each interaction. Are you being yourself, or are you trying to mold yourself to fit someone else's expectations? Trust your instincts and set healthy boundaries.The Importance of Social Support: Dating can be challenging, but having a supportive community makes a big difference. Gemma and Justine announce their upcoming 6-week group coaching program, Date Differently, which brings together women navigating similar dating challenges to share experiences and build self-confidence.Course mentioned:Masterclass – Breaking Free from Love-Traps: Understanding the Science of Schema Chemistry: Learn how to break the cycle of unhealthy relationship patterns. Sign up for this self-paced course here.Support the show

Hi, Do you have a question for us? Ask away!Special Announcements:New Group Coaching Program: "Date Differently": A 6-week online group coaching program designed to help women build self-trust, set boundaries, and date with confidence. Starts November 6th. SIGN UP NOW FOR BIG DISCOUNTSignature Course – The Red Flag Project: This newly updated course covers schemas, red flags, and how to recognize unavailable partners. It's recommended to take the course before joining the coaching program to get the most out of the sessions. Access it here.  Special limited time discount code: HERBESTLIFEHow to Connect for relationship & dating content:Website: The Red Flag ProjectEmail: JustineandGemma@goomood.com.auInstagram: theredflagprojectofficialEpisode Summary:In this episode, we explore the challenges of navigating casual sex culture and hookup culture, particularly for individuals with abandonment schemas, emotional deprivation schemas, or anxious attachment styles. Join us as we discuss common scenarios, the emotional impacts of casual encounters, and strategies for those seeking meaningful relationships.Key Discussion Points:The Rise of Casual Sex Culture:We delve into how dating apps and societal expectations have normalized casual encounters, particularly for women who may feel pressured to conform.Understanding Your Emotional Triggers:We discuss how casual sex can activate abandonment schemas and emotional wounds, often leading to feelings of inadequacy and anxiety post-encounter.Common Scenarios in Dating:We share stories of women who experience heartache after one-night stands, leaving them questioning their worth and what went wrong.Reframing the Narrative:We emphasize the importance of recognizing that there is nothing inherently wrong with you if a casual encounter doesn't lead to a desired relationship. It's often more about the other person's readiness for commitment.Strategies for Healing:Practical advice on how to approach dating intentionally and slowly, allowing for emotional healing and self-discovery.The Importance of Healthy Boundaries:We discuss how setting boundaries can help in finding the right partner and avoiding the pitfalls of casual relationships when seeking something deeper.Understanding Male Perspectives:Insights into how men may approach relationships differently and how this can affect women's emotional experiences in casual encounters.Takeaway Messages:If you identify with having an abandonment schema, it's crucial to question whether casual sex aligns with your emotional needs and goals in relationships.Building a new narrative around self-worth can lead to healthier dating practices and more fulfilling connections.Healing from emotional wounds requires active engagement and sometimes means saying no to casual encounters.Navigating relationships in today's casual sex culture isn't easy, especially for those with emotional wounds. A conscious approach to dating—taking things slow and understanding your needs—is essential for fostering healthy relationships.Support the show

Hi, Do you have a question for us? Ask away!In this thoughtful Mailbox episode, Justine and Gemma respond to a listener's heartfelt question about navigating the confusion between green flags and subtle red flags in a relationship. 'Laura', the listener, describes her experience dating a man who seemed like a wonderful partner—kind, attentive, successful, and emotionally vulnerable. However, despite these positive qualities, Laura noticed subtle signs of emotional detachment and avoidance that left her questioning whether she was overreacting or misinterpreting the situation.Gemma and Justine guide 'Laura' through the process of recognizing that what she saw as subtle red flags were, in fact, pretty significant signs of deeper issues. They discuss how behaviors like rushing into intimacy, oversharing trauma early on, and withdrawing during difficult conversations are often clear markers of emotional unavailability. These red flags can be easily overlooked when our schemas—particularly abandonment or anxious attachment schemas—get in the way, making us doubt our instincts or take too much responsibility for relationship challenges.Gemma and Justine emphasize that Laura's experience is a common one, especially for those whose schemas may cloud their ability to accurately assess a partner's behavior. They offer practical advice on how to trust your instincts, stay attuned to how you feel in a relationship, and avoid the trap of self-blame when things don't seem to add up.Topics discussed:Emotional vulnerability vs. trauma bonding: Understanding when vulnerability feels meaningful versus when it's used to create a quick emotional connection that isn't sustainable.Rushing intimacy: Why too much attention or time too quickly can signal unmet emotional needs in the other person, rather than a healthy, steady connection.Emotional withdrawal: How detachment during sex, lack of affection, or avoidance of difficult topics are often red flags for emotional unavailability—even when a partner seems attentive in other areas.The role of schemas: How an abandonment schema can lead to self-doubt, causing us to overlook or minimize important warning signs.Balancing green and red flags: Why even a relationship filled with positive traits can be problematic if subtle, but significant, red flags are undermining emotional intimacy and trust.This episode is essential listening for anyone navigating the complexities of dating, especially if you're finding it difficult to interpret mixed signals. Justine and Gemma remind us that trusting your gut and recognizing your schemas can help you make clearer, more empowered decisions in relationships.Reach out to us by email if you are interested in our new exciting group coaching program "Date Differently".  Information about private coaching with Dr Gemma or Dr Justine email us: justineandgemma@goodmood.com.auThe Red Flag Project: a place for women to do the self-development they need to choose loving, respectful relationships.InstagramFacebookClick the link below to find out more about our online dating course, our course on schema chemistry and how to break free from love-traps.Linktree: https://linktr.ee/theredflagprojectSchema Therapy for Life: For anyone who wants to become their own pattern-breaker using the wisdom and clarity of Schema Therapy.Support the show

Hi, send us a text message or suggest a topicIn this episode, Gemma & Justine dive into a listener's question that touches on the emotional impact of casual sex, particularly for those who struggle with an abandonment schema. Using a listener's experience with one-night stands and emotional triggers, we explore how unresolved attachment wounds can complicate what is often thought of as a carefree encounter. They discuss why casual sex may not feel so casual for individuals with abandonment wounds and offer insights into why emotional responses can be heightened in these situations.Key Takeaways:Emotional Attachment During Casual Sex: Even if the intent is to keep things casual, those with an abandonment schema often experience deep emotional responses, which can make casual sex far more complicated.The Role of Childhood Trauma: Unmet emotional needs from childhood, such as parental abandonment or lack of care, can resurface during intimate encounters, leading to feelings of vulnerability or sadness.Understanding the Schema's Influence: Individuals with an abandonment schema may unconsciously seek emotional connection and validation during casual encounters, despite knowing logically that the interaction is meant to be non-committal.Navigating "Situationships": Long-term casual sexual relationships may develop emotional attachments, further reinforcing feelings of rejection and abandonment when the other partner doesn't reciprocate deeper connection.Healing and Moving Forward: Gemma and Justine encourage setting boundaries and communicating needs clearly, while also doing the inner work to heal the wounded child. This helps avoid reinforcing harmful emotional patterns and promotes healthier relationships.Tips for Listeners:Recognize Your Emotional Needs: If casual sex leaves you feeling hurt or triggered, it's essential to acknowledge the role your abandonment schema may be playing.Be Honest With Yourself: Are you hoping for something more from your partner? It's crucial to recognize when you're longing for a deeper emotional connection that the other person may not be able to provide.Set Clear Boundaries: If casual sex is not working for you emotionally, it might be time to reassess your boundaries and be upfront about what you want from your relationships.Focus on Healing: Work on healing your core abandonment wounds through therapy or self-reflection to reduce vulnerability in intimate situations.Resources Mentioned:Schema Therapy and Abandonment Wound HealingPrevious episodes on dating and the abandonment schema (Parts 1 & 2)Join the conversation on Instagram: @theredflagprojectofficialVisit our websites: theredflagproject.com | goodmood.com.auStay Connected: Subscribe to the podcast for more insightful conversations about relationships, emotional healing, and overcoming personal barriers.Information about private therapy/coaching with Dr Gemma or Dr Justine email us: justineandgemma@goodmood.com.auSupport the show

Hi, send us a text message. In this episode, we unpack the complexities of the entitlement schema—a schema that's often linked to narcissistic traits and one that rarely brings individuals to therapy. Unlike schemas like abandonment or self-sacrifice, those with an entitlement schema often believe their way of thinking is justified, which makes it hard to seek change. We explore how this schema is formed, how it manifests in relationships, and what it takes for someone to recognize and work on it. This episode is particularly useful for those in relationships with someone exhibiting entitlement or for parents wanting to avoid fostering this trait in their children.Key Points Discussed:Entitlement Schema Basics:Entitlement schema involves a belief that one's needs and desires trump others, often without consideration for reciprocity.Unlike other schemas, those with entitlement often don't recognize it as a problem, making it difficult for them to seek help.Connection to Narcissism:The entitlement schema is closely linked to narcissism, with individuals often displaying a lack of empathy, grandiosity, and demanding behavior.People with this schema rarely self-reflect and are usually satisfied with their approach to life, making therapy engagement rare.Two Main Origins of Entitlement:Overindulgence in Childhood: Children who grow up without learning limits or consequences may develop a sense of entitlement.Overcompensation for Emotional Deprivation: Those who felt unseen or neglected may overcompensate by developing an entitlement schema to meet their unmet needs in adulthood.Entitlement in Relationships:Entitlement can cause significant strain in relationships, often pairing with someone who feels under-entitled or self-sacrificing.These dynamics lead to an imbalance, with the entitled partner often making decisions unilaterally and disregarding the needs of others.Challenges in Therapy:People with an entitlement schema may only seek therapy when their relationships are on the rocks or they are losing important connections.Therapy focuses on building rapport and slowly confronting the entitlement through empathic confrontation, helping the person recognize the impact of their behavior.How to Recognize Entitlement in a Partner:Lack of empathy or curiosity about your needs.Always prioritizing their own desires and making decisions without consultation.Low tolerance for frustration, impulsivity, or demanding behavior.Managing Entitlement in Relationships:Establishing clear boundaries is key, but can lead to pushback or anger from the entitled partner.Partners often feel like they need to subjugate their own needs, which can lead to long-term resentment and emotional exhaustion.Takeaway Message: Recognizing and addressing entitlement in relationships is challenging but necessary. It requires both partners to work on understanding schemas and finding healthier ways to communicate and meet each other's needs. For those with an entitlement schema, change is possible, but it takes time, empathy, and a willingness to confront deep-seated patterns.Information about private therapy/coaching with Dr Gemma or Dr Justine email us: justineandgemma@goodmood.com.auSupport the show

Hi, send us a text message. Episode Summary:Dr Gemma Gladstone and Justine Corry dive into the Failure Schema, a schema that is often overlooked but can be profoundly impactful in many areas of life, particularly in achievement and work-related contexts. They explore how this schema manifests, its origins, and how it often intertwines with other schemas such as defectiveness, dependence, and even unrelenting standards.Key Takeaways:Understanding the Failure Schema: The Failure Schema is a pervasive belief that one is destined to fail or is inherently inadequate, especially when compared to others. It often surfaces in academic, career, and achievement-related areas.Origins and Development: This schema may develop from childhood experiences such as being labeled as "slow," having learning difficulties, or growing up with unrealistic expectations from parents. It can also be linked to feeling inadequate compared to siblings or peers.Coping Styles: The failure schema can lead to various coping behaviors, including avoidance (not trying new things due to fear of failure), surrender (believing fully in the schema and setting low standards for oneself), and overcompensation (attempting to prove the schema wrong by setting unrealistic goals).Self-Sabotage: One of the most significant ways the failure schema manifests is through self-sabotage, where individuals might avoid challenges, procrastinate, or engage in behaviors that ensure they fail, thus reinforcing the schema.Interrelation with Other Schemas: The failure schema often does not exist in isolation. It may be accompanied by schemas like defectiveness (feeling inherently flawed) or unrelenting standards (setting impossibly high standards to avoid failure).Practical Advice:Challenge the Schema: Start by identifying the origins of your failure schema. Reflect on past experiences that may have contributed to its development and consider alternative explanations for these experiences.Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway: Overcoming the failure schema requires pushing through the fear of failure and taking risks. Setting achievable goals and gradually exposing yourself to new challenges can help shift this deep-seated belief.Break the Cycle: Recognize the coping behaviors that reinforce the failure schema and actively work to change them. Whether it's avoidance, surrender, or overcompensation, addressing these patterns is key to overcoming the schema.CONNECT WITH USThe Red Flag Project: a place for women to do the self-development they need to choose loving, respectful relationships.InstagramFacebookClick the link below to find out more about our online dating course, our course on schema chemistry and how to break free from love-traps and our online membership The Schema Circle.Linktree: https://linktr.ee/theredflagprojectSchema Therapy for Life: For anyone who wants to become their own pattern-breaker using the wisdom and clarity of Schema Therapy.InstagramFacebookLinktree: https://linktr.ee/schematherapyforlifeInformation about private therapy/coaching with Gemma or Justine email us: justineandgemma@goodmood.com.auSupport the Show.

Hi, send us a text message. Episode Summary: In this episode, Gemma Gladstone tackles a listener's question about break-up recovery and the elusive concept of closure.  Drawing from her extensive experience as a therapist over the last 25 years, she provides practical advice on healing after a painful breakup, what to do and what not to do as well as managing lingering feelings.Key Points:Introduction to Listener's Question:A listener, referred to as "Lisa," shares her experience of a difficult breakup with a partner who exhibited love-bombing behavior.Lisa is conflicted about seeking closure by expressing her feelings to her ex versus moving on without further contact.Understanding Love Bombing:Gemma explains the dynamics of love bombing and its association with narcissistic traits.The importance of recognizing red flags early in relationships.Healing Tips Post-Breakup:No Contact Rule: Avoid all forms of contact with the ex-partner, including social media, to facilitate healing.Avoid Rumination: Recognize and interrupt patterns of overthinking and counterfactual thinking to prevent emotional stagnation.Validate Your Emotions: Acknowledge and accept your feelings of grief and sadness as a natural part of the healing process.Mindfulness and Self-Compassion:Techniques to become aware of and manage unhelpful thoughts.The role of self-compassion in validating and soothing your emotional pain.Avoiding Rebound Relationships:The dangers of jumping into new relationships or casual encounters too soon.The importance of self-reflection and understanding personal patterns before starting a new relationship.The Concept of Closure:Differentiating between seeking resolution and seeking closure.Understanding that closure often involves needing something from the other person, which may not always be possible.The importance of finding closure within oneself rather than relying on external validation or apologies.Resources Mentioned:The Red Flag Project: A comprehensive course on identifying and understanding red flags in relationships. For more information, visit redflagproject.orgCONNECT WITH USThe Red Flag Project: a place for women to do the self-development they need to choose loving, respectful relationships.InstagramFacebookClick the link below to find out more about our online dating course, our course on schema chemistry and how to break free from love-traps and our online membership The Schema Circle.Linktree: https://linktr.ee/theredflagprojectSchema Therapy for Life: For anyone who wants to become their own pattern-breaker using the wisdom and clarity of Schema Therapy.InstagramFacebookLinktree: https://linktr.ee/schematherapyforlifeInformation about private therapy/coaching with Gemma or Justine email us: justineandgemma@goodmood.com.auSupport the Show.

Hi, send us a text message. Schema Circle Membership - Join Now! Information about private therapy/coaching with Gemma or Justine email us: justineandgemma@goodmood.com.au In today's episode, Gemma explores the impact of Defensiveness on relationships, its root causes, and practical steps to overcome it.Key Points:Defensive Phrases:Common examples: "It's not my fault," "You always," "You never," "You're overreacting."Recognize these as signs of defensiveness.Impact on Relationships:Defensiveness is a relationship killer, identified by John and Julie Gottman as one of the "Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse."High levels of defensiveness can predict relationship breakup and divorce.Triggers and Responses:Often triggered by low to medium-level criticisms or requests from a partner.Immediate emotional responses include feelings of threat, anger, and injustice.Behavioral Patterns:Refusing to acknowledge wrongdoing.Redirecting blame or overly justifying actions.Counterattacking or withdrawing.Underlying Causes:Common schemas involved: defectiveness, emotional deprivation, mistrust, subjugation.Often stems from childhood experiences with critical or narcissistic parents.Steps to Overcome Defensiveness:Reflect on defensive incidents when calm.Identify triggers and feelings.Recognize the part of yourself you're defending.Acknowledge and validate your vulnerable inner child.Reassure the defensive part of you that you're now an adult and safe.Practice responding calmly and reasonably.Practical Exercise:Sit quietly and recall a recent defensive episode.Identify your reaction and underlying feelings.Visualize a conversation with your inner child and defender.Reassure them and imagine a healthier response in future interactions.Conclusion: Defensiveness is common but can be managed with self-awareness and compassionate inner dialogue. Reflect, identify triggers, and practice calm responses to improve relationship dynamics.CONNECT WITH USThe Red Flag Project: a place for women to do the self-development they need to choose loving, respectful relationships.InstagramFacebookClick the link below to find out more about our online dating course, our course on schema chemistry and how to break free from love-traps and our online membership The Schema Circle.Linktree: https://linktr.ee/theredflagprojectSchema Therapy for Life: For anyone who wants to become their own pattern-breaker using the wisdom and clarity of Schema Therapy.InstagramFacebookClick below for more information on our online membership The Schema Circle - the first membership to help you break free from your unhelpful patterns using the wisdom of Schema Therapy.Linktree: https://linktr.ee/schematherapyforlifeSupport the Show.

Send us a Text Message.Welcome to another episode of The Good Mood Clinic Podcast!Schema Circle Membership - Join Now! Reparenting is at the heart of schema therapy and you can learn how to do it yourself. In this episode Gemma and Justine discuss how to start reparenting yourself and provide several practical suggestions for how to get started.  Reparenting is central to psychological and schema healing.  The more you practice, the easier it gets and the  psychologically integrated and connected you will feel.  CONNECT WITH USThe Red Flag Project: a place for women to do the self-development they need to choose loving, respectful relationships.InstagramFacebookClick the link below to find out more about our online dating course, our course on schema chemistry and how to break free from love-traps and our online membership The Schema Circle.Linktree: https://linktr.ee/theredflagprojectSchema Therapy for Life: For anyone who wants to become their own pattern-breaker using the wisdom and clarity of Schema Therapy.InstagramFacebookClick below for more information on our online membership The Schema Circle - the first membership to help you break free from your unhelpful patterns using the wisdom of Schema Therapy.Linktree: https://linktr.ee/schematherapyforlifeABOUT THE PODCASTThe Good Mood Clinic podcast focuses on our passion for Schema Therapy and how it transforms lives for the better. We talk about all things to do with Schema Therapy so you can become your own pattern-breaker and change your life for good. We think the whole world would be a better place if everyone healed their schemas!If you enjoy listening to the podcast please do leave a 5-star review on Apple Podcasts - even a few words helps! You can also email us with any feedback, thoughts on what you have learned from the episodes or even suggest future topics.Please note: This podcast is for information and entertainment purposes only and is no substitute for professional or relationship advice from a registered therapist. Please seek advice that is tailored to your specific needs from a mental heath or relationship expert.Support the Show.

Send us a Text Message.Get the Free Guide on Breaking the toxic ties of Narcissistic parentsWelcome to another episode of The Good Mood Clinic Podcast!Schema Circle Membership - Join Now! In this episode Gemma discusses what puts people at risk of having narcissistic friends.  What are some of the schemas that play a role in this? What can you do if you realise that you have 1 too many self-absorbed people in your life?  It can feel demoralizing and you might feel like giving up.  Gemma then discusses ways for taking care of yourself and increasing your social contact with others.  CONNECT WITH USThe Red Flag Project: a place for women to do the self-development they need to choose loving, respectful relationships.InstagramFacebookClick the link below to find out more about our online dating course, our course on schema chemistry and how to break free from love-traps and our online membership The Schema Circle.Linktree: https://linktr.ee/theredflagprojectSchema Therapy for Life: For anyone who wants to become their own pattern-breaker using the wisdom and clarity of Schema Therapy.InstagramFacebookClick below for more information on our online membership The Schema Circle - the first membership to help you break free from your unhelpful patterns using the wisdom of Schema Therapy.Linktree: https://linktr.ee/schematherapyforlifeABOUT THE PODCASTThe Good Mood Clinic podcast focuses on our passion for Schema Therapy and how it transforms lives for the better. We talk about all things to do with Schema Therapy so you can become your own pattern-breaker and change your life for good. We think the whole world would be a better place if everyone healed their schemas!If you enjoy listening to the podcast please do leave a 5-star review on Apple Podcasts - even a few words helps! You can also email us with any feedback, thoughts on what you have learned from the episodes or even suggest future topics.Please note: This podcast is for information and entertainment purposes only and is no substitute for professional or relationship advice from a registered therapist. Please seek advice that is tailored to your specific needs from a mental heath or relationship expert.Support the Show.

Send us a Text Message.Welcome to another episode of The Good Mood Clinic Podcast!Schema Circle Membership - Join Now! In this episode Gemma and Justine go back to basics and take a deep-dive into what is a schema or an Early Maladaptive Schema to be precise.    This episode will provide you with the basics of what you need to know if you're wanting to understand schemas more thoroughly or are perhaps confused about the concept and can't quite grasp it.  Hope you enjoy the episode!CONNECT WITH USThe Red Flag Project: a place for women to do the self-development they need to choose loving, respectful relationships.InstagramFacebookClick the link below to find out more about our online dating course, our course on schema chemistry and how to break free from love-traps and our online membership The Schema Circle.Linktree: https://linktr.ee/theredflagprojectSchema Therapy for Life: For anyone who wants to become their own pattern-breaker using the wisdom and clarity of Schema Therapy.InstagramFacebookClick below for more information on our online membership The Schema Circle - the first membership to help you break free from your unhelpful patterns using the wisdom of Schema Therapy.Linktree: https://linktr.ee/schematherapyforlifeABOUT THE PODCASTThe Good Mood Clinic podcast focuses on our passion for Schema Therapy and how it transforms lives for the better. We talk about all things to do with Schema Therapy so you can become your own pattern-breaker and change your life for good. We think the whole world would be a better place if everyone healed their schemas!If you enjoy listening to the podcast please do leave a 5-star review on Apple Podcasts - even a few words helps! You can also email us with any feedback, thoughts on what you have learned from the episodes or even suggest future topics.Please note: This podcast is for information and entertainment purposes only and is no substitute for professional or relationship advice from a registered therapist. Please seek advice that is tailored to your specific needs from a mental heath or relationship expert.Support the Show.

Welcome to another episode of The Good Mood Clinic Podcast!Today we share a clip from our "Schema In Focus" series in our Schema Circle Membership.  Gemma and Justine discuss this schema in-depth, including its origins, what it feels like, how it is typically triggered and other things to look out for with this schema. CONNECT WITH USThe Red Flag Project: a place for women to do the self-development they need to choose loving, respectful relationships.InstagramFacebookClick the link below to find out more about our online dating course, our course on schema chemistry and how to break free from love-traps and our online membership The Schema Circle.Linktree: https://linktr.ee/theredflagprojectSchema Therapy for Life: For anyone who wants to become their own pattern-breaker using the wisdom and clarity of Schema Therapy.InstagramFacebookClick below for more information on our online membership The Schema Circle - the first membership to help you break free from your unhelpful patterns using the wisdom of Schema Therapy.Linktree: https://linktr.ee/schematherapyforlifeABOUT THE PODCASTThe Good Mood Clinic podcast focuses on our passion for Schema Therapy and how it transforms lives for the better. We talk about all things to do with Schema Therapy so you can become your own pattern-breaker and change your life for good. We think the whole world would be a better place if everyone healed their schemas!If you enjoy listening to the podcast please do leave a 5-star review on Apple Podcasts - even a few words helps! You can also email us with any feedback, thoughts on what you have learned from the episodes or even suggest future topics.Please note: This podcast is for information and entertainment purposes only and is no substitute for professional or relationship advice from a registered therapist. Please seek advice that is tailored to your specific needs from a mental heath or relationship expert.Support the Show.

Welcome to another episode of The Good Mood Clinic Podcast!In today's episode  Gemma discusses the invisible reasons why so many women find it hard to leave an unhealthy relationship EARLY.  Based on her experience and knowledge gained from hearing the stories of hundred's of women, Gemma outlines her top 3 schema-related reasons why women don't exit relationships with partners who shows signs of unavailability, control and or narcissism.  Tune in to find out why you may have gone against your best instincts and hung in there too long hoping for your new partner to change. CONNECT WITH USThe Red Flag Project: a place for women to do the self-development they need to choose loving, respectful relationships.InstagramFacebookClick the link below to find out more about our online dating course, our course on schema chemistry and how to break free from love-traps and our online membership The Schema Circle.Linktree: https://linktr.ee/theredflagprojectSchema Therapy for Life: For anyone who wants to become their own pattern-breaker using the wisdom and clarity of Schema Therapy.InstagramFacebookClick below for more information on our online membership The Schema Circle - the first membership to help you break free from your unhelpful patterns using the wisdom of Schema Therapy.Linktree: https://linktr.ee/schematherapyforlifeABOUT THE PODCASTThe Good Mood Clinic podcast focuses on our passion for Schema Therapy and how it transforms lives for the better. We talk about all things to do with Schema Therapy so you can become your own pattern-breaker and change your life for good. We think the whole world would be a better place if everyone healed their schemas!If you enjoy listening to the podcast please do leave a 5-star review on Apple Podcasts - even a few words helps! You can also email us with any feedback, thoughts on what you have learned from the episodes or even suggest future topics.Please note: This podcast is for information and entertainment purposes only and is no substitute for professional or relationship advice from a registered therapist. Please seek advice that is tailored to your specific needs from a mental heath or relationship expert.Support the show

Welcome to another episode of The Good Mood Clinic Podcast!In today's episode we play an excerpt from a deep dive discussion on the abandonment schema from our monthly membership program, The Schema Circle.We discuss the abandonment schema and fine tune it's origins, what it actually feels like and the many triggers for this schema. CONNECT WITH USThe Red Flag Project: a place for women to do the self-development they need to choose loving, respectful relationships.InstagramFacebookClick the link below to find out more about our online dating course, our course on schema chemistry and how to break free from love-traps and our online membership The Schema Circle.Linktree: https://linktr.ee/theredflagprojectSchema Therapy for Life: For anyone who wants to become their own pattern-breaker using the wisdom and clarity of Schema Therapy.InstagramFacebookClick below for more information on our online membership The Schema Circle - the first membership to help you break free from your unhelpful patterns using the wisdom of Schema Therapy.Linktree: https://linktr.ee/schematherapyforlifeABOUT THE PODCASTThe Good Mood Clinic podcast focuses on our passion for Schema Therapy and how it transforms lives for the better. We talk about all things to do with Schema Therapy so you can become your own pattern-breaker and change your life for good. We think the whole world would be a better place if everyone healed their schemas!If you enjoy listening to the podcast please do leave a 5-star review on Apple Podcasts - even a few words helps! You can also email us with any feedback, thoughts on what you have learned from the episodes or even suggest future topics.Please note: This podcast is for information and entertainment purposes only and is no substitute for professional or relationship advice from a registered therapist. Please seek advice that is tailored to your specific needs from a mental heath or relationship expert.An exciting and unique limited new year offer - Ends 7th Jan, 2024http://www.theredflagproject.com An exciting and unique limited new year offer - Ends 7th Jan, 2024http://www.theredflagproject.comSupport the show

Welcome to another episode of The Good Mood Clinic Podcast!We talk about this so much with our clients.  Sometimes spotting red flags isn't the problem, its acting on them for your own best interests. In today's episode we discuss the main reasons why you might ignore red flags when dating.  We look at the role of core schemas such as 'abandonment', 'emotional deprivation' and 'defectiveness' and how these schema can negatively influence our decision making.  We think you'll enjoy this one if you have ever struggled with leaving a new relationship even though one part of you knew it wasn't right for you. Hope you enjoy. CONNECT WITH USThe Red Flag Project: a place for women to do the self-development they need to choose loving, respectful relationships.InstagramFacebookClick the link below to find out more about our online dating course, our course on schema chemistry and how to break free from love-traps and our online membership The Schema Circle.Linktree: https://linktr.ee/theredflagprojectSchema Therapy for Life: For anyone who wants to become their own pattern-breaker using the wisdom and clarity of Schema Therapy.InstagramFacebookClick below for more information on our online membership The Schema Circle - the first membership to help you break free from your unhelpful patterns using the wisdom of Schema Therapy.Linktree: https://linktr.ee/schematherapyforlifeABOUT THE PODCASTThe Good Mood Clinic podcast focuses on our passion for Schema Therapy and how it transforms lives for the better. We talk about all things to do with Schema Therapy so you can become your own pattern-breaker and change your life for good. We think the whole world would be a better place if everyone healed their schemas!If you enjoy listening to the podcast please do leave a 5-star review on Apple Podcasts - even a few words helps! You can also email us with any feedback, thoughts on what you have learned from the episodes or even suggest future topics.Please note: This podcast is for information and entertainment purposes only and is no substitute for professional or relationship advice from a registered therapist. Please seek advice that is tailored to your specific needs from a mental heath or relationship expert.Are you a regular listener who loves what we do on this podcast.  Consider helping us continue to put out great content by making a small monthly contribution here - Support the showSupport the show

Welcome to another episode of The Good Mood Clinic Podcast!When a schema is triggered, we typically have an urge to respond in 1 of 3 (unhelpful) ways.  In this episode Gemma talks about 'over-compensation' as one of those coping style.  Over-compensation (also referred to a counter-attack) is one of 3 maladaptive coping styles discussed in schema therapy.  Gemma reviews examples of over-compensation behaviours associated with each of the 18 schemas (in the original schema model). CONNECT WITH USThe Red Flag Project: a place for women to do the self-development they need to choose loving, respectful relationships.InstagramFacebookClick the link below to find out more about our online dating course, our course on schema chemistry and how to break free from lovetraps and our online membership The Schema Circle.Linktree: https://linktr.ee/theredflagprojectSchema Therapy for Life: For anyone who wants to become their own pattern-breaker using the wisdom and clarity of Schema Therapy.InstagramFacebookClick below for more information on our online membership The Schema Circle - the first membership to help you break free from your unhelpful patterns using the wisdom of Schema Therapy.Linktree: https://linktr.ee/schematherapyforlifeABOUT THE PODCASTThe Good Mood Clinic podcast focuses on our passion for Schema Therapy and how it transforms lives for the better. We talk about all things to do with Schema Therapy so you can become your own pattern-breaker and change your life for good. We think the whole world would be a better place if everyone healed their schemas!If you enjoy listening to the podcast please do leave a 5-star review on Apple Podcasts - even a few words helps! You can also email us with any feedback, thoughts on what you have learned from the episodes or even suggest future topics.Please note: This podcast is for information and entertainment purposes only and is no substitute for professional or relationship advice from a registered therapist. Please seek advice that is tailored to your specific needs from a mental heath or relationship expert.Support the show

Dear Therapist, Carer or anyone witnessing the emotional pain & suffering of a client or another person or friend.  You are invited to take a breath, stop and notice how you are feeling.  Spend 20 minutes doing this compassion-based exercise with Dr Gemma Gladstone as she guides you through a journey of loving-kindness towards both yourself and the person you are choosing to focus on.   

Welcome to another episode of The Good Mood Clinic Podcast!Very soon we will be re-launching our Membership Program.   Are you ready to go to the next level in your self-development using the clarity, wisdom and insights from Schema Therapy?  We'd love to have you join us. Go to this link to get on the waitlist now for our Schema Circle membershiphttps://www.theredflagproject.com/schema-circleClick here to have a look at  ALL our resources and products here, including the FREE GUIDETHE RED FLAG PROJECT - ECOURSE FOR WOMENhttps://theredflagproject.com/https://www.facebook.com/theredflagproject2022/https://www.instagram.com/theredflagproject._/SCHEMA THERAPY FOR LIFEhttps://www.facebook.com/SchemaTherapyForLifehttps://www.instagram.com/schema_therapy_for_life/Parenting Teenagers You'll love this episode if you're looking for tips and clues for parenting your teen or tween.  In this episode we discuss a question asked by a member of our Schema Circle.  The questions asks how to manage and deal with teenagers when they are  being "disrespectful" difficult and or angry and you are in the firing line!  How can we be the "Lighthouse" for our teens and give them the love , support and inclusion that they need while also having limits an boundaries. 

Welcome to another episode of The Good Mood Clinic Podcast!Very soon we will be re-launching our Membership Program.   Are you ready to go to the next level in your self-development using the clarity, wisdom and insights from Schema Therapy?  We'd love to have you join us.  Go to this link to get on the waitlist now for our Schema Circle membershiphttps://www.theredflagproject.com/schema-circleClick here to have a look at  ALL our resources and products here, including the FREE GUIDETHE RED FLAG PROJECT - ECOURSE FOR WOMENhttps://theredflagproject.com/https://www.facebook.com/theredflagproject2022/https://www.instagram.com/theredflagproject._/SCHEMA THERAPY FOR LIFEhttps://www.facebook.com/SchemaTherapyForLifehttps://www.instagram.com/schema_therapy_for_life/In today's episode Gemma and Justine answer a question from one of their Schema Circle members.  The question asks how can we know if our reaction to a break-up is fuelled by an abandonment schema or not?  Before getting into this question, Gemma provides a review of the abandonment schema, it's origin and how it tends to play out in romantic relationships.  The 3 ways this schema plays out in romantic relationships are (1) - an avoidance pattern; (2) - a surrendering pattern and (3) - an over-compensating pattern.  Gemma gives examples and explains each of these patterns.  Contact us by email- justineandgemma@goodmood.com.auhttps://www.goodmood.com.au/podcast/

Welcome to another episode of The Good Mood Clinic Podcast!We are re-launching our new membership program!! Are you ready to go to the next level in your self-development using the clarity, wisdom and insights from Schema Therapy?  We'd love to have you join us.  Go to this link to get on the waitlist now for our Schema Circle membershiphttps://www.theredflagproject.com/schema-circleClick here to Have a look at  ALL our resources and products here, including the FREE GUIDETHE RED FLAG PROJECT - ECOURSE FOR WOMENhttps://theredflagproject.com/https://www.facebook.com/theredflagproject2022/https://www.instagram.com/theredflagproject._/SCHEMA THERAPY FOR LIFEhttps://www.facebook.com/SchemaTherapyForLifehttps://www.instagram.com/schema_therapy_for_life/Contact us by email- justineandgemma@goodmood.com.auhttps://www.goodmood.com.au/podcast/

Welcome to another episode of The Good Mood Clinic Podcast!We are re-launching our new membership program!! Are you ready to go to the next level in your self-development using the clarity, wisdom and insights from Schema Therapy?  We'd love to have you join us.  Go to this link to get on the waitlist now for our Schema Circle membershiphttps://www.theredflagproject.com/schema-circleClick here to Have a look at  ALL our resources and products hereTHE RED FLAG PROJECT - ECOURSE FOR WOMENhttps://theredflagproject.com/https://www.facebook.com/theredflagproject2022/https://www.instagram.com/theredflagproject._/SCHEMA THERAPY FOR LIFEhttps://www.facebook.com/SchemaTherapyForLifehttps://www.instagram.com/schema_therapy_for_life/Contact us by email- justineandgemma@goodmood.com.auhttps://www.goodmood.com.au/podcast/In today's episode, we discuss the emotional deprivation schema and how to start to heal this schema from the inside out.  This is probably the most common schema - about 50% of people have this schema.  It's the one that can be the hardest to recognise because we are often not aware of what we didn't get.  Stay tuned to hear us discuss how we start to work with this schema and what you can do in a practical way to start the healing process yourself.  

Welcome to another episode of The Good Mood Clinic Podcast!NEW!  Go to this link to get on the waitlist now https://www.theredflagproject.com/schema-circleWe are launching our new membership program!! Are you ready to go to the next level in your self-development using the clarity, wisdom and insights from Schema Therapy?  We'd love to have you join us.Have a look at  ALL our resources and products hereTHE RED FLAG PROJECT - ECOURSE FOR WOMENhttps://theredflagproject.com/https://www.facebook.com/theredflagproject2022/https://www.instagram.com/theredflagproject._/SCHEMA THERAPY FOR LIFEhttps://www.facebook.com/SchemaTherapyForLifehttps://www.instagram.com/schema_therapy_for_life/Contact us by email- justineandgemma@goodmood.com.auhttps://www.goodmood.com.au/podcast/Are you unsure about the difference between these 2 common schemas.  In this Bitesize episode we discuss the difference and similarities between these schemas.  These schemas are often considered to be 'conditional' schemas in that they develop as a way to cope with and respond to the core schemas - like abandonment for example.  

Welcome to another episode of The Good Mood Clinic Podcast!NEW!  Go to this link to get on the waitlist now - Schema Circle Membership Sign up for the early-bird bonuses We are launching our new membership program!! Are you ready to go to the next level in your self-development using the clarity, wisdom and insights from Schema Therapy?  We'd love to have you join us.https://courses.theredflagproject.com/schema-circleHave a look at  ALL our resources and products hereTHE RED FLAG PROJECT - ECOURSE FOR WOMENhttps://theredflagproject.com/https://www.facebook.com/theredflagproject2022/https://www.instagram.com/theredflagproject._/SCHEMA THERAPY FOR LIFEhttps://www.facebook.com/SchemaTherapyForLifehttps://www.instagram.com/schema_therapy_for_life/Contact us by email- justineandgemma@goodmood.com.auhttps://www.goodmood.com.au/podcast/In this thought-provoking episode, we explore the concept of disorganized attachment style and challenge the inclination to worry excessively about labels. Join us as we delve into the complexities of disorganized attachment and shed light on why understanding it shouldn't be a source of distress. We'll discuss the limitations of categorization and emphasize the importance of focusing on the underlying experiences and emotions that shape our attachment patterns.

Welcome to another episode of The Good Mood Clinic Podcast! NEW!  Schema Circle Membership- sign up for the early-bird bonuses  We are launching our new membership program!! Are you ready to go to the next level in your self-development using the clarity, wisdom and insights from Schema Therapy?  We'd love to have you join us.Have a look at  ALL our resources and products hereTHE RED FLAG PROJECT - ECOURSE FOR WOMENhttps://theredflagproject.com/https://www.facebook.com/theredflagproject2022/https://www.instagram.com/theredflagproject._/SCHEMA THERAPY FOR LIFEhttps://www.facebook.com/SchemaTherapyForLifehttps://www.instagram.com/schema_therapy_for_life/Contact us by email- justineandgemma@goodmood.com.auhttps://www.goodmood.com.au/podcast/Talking to a Narcissist? Avoid These 6 Common PitfallsVery often, if you were raised by a narcissist, in adulthood you will more or less fall into the trap of seeking the approval of people who are narcissistic.A narcissists acceptance of you is often conditional – as long as you are the version of you they want to see, then they treat you well, or at least in an acceptable way. In this episode Gemma discusses 6 relational or communications pitfalls to avoid when communicating with the difficult narcissist in your life. These are people who are really difficult to deal with or communicate with, who might gaslight you or try to manipulate you, who might be highly defensive, super sensitive to criticism, self-absorbed/self-centred; have angry outbursts; tantrums; and tend to be blaming of others and sometimes can be - condensending; patronizing and belittling. Avoid these mistakes:1. Getting upset and highly emotional (instead stay calm)2. Trying to get them to understand your perspective (this is a limitation & block for them…accept they will most likely never get it)3. Expressing how you feel about something (eg, I find those comments very hurtful) .  Unfortunately, these types of self-disclosures often irritate the narcissist and they may flip into further over-compensating behaviours4. Asking permission for something in a self-subjugating way5. Staying in the firing line.6.  Trying to get their approval / waiting for their approval / waiting for the praise that never comes.  

Welcome to another episode of The Good Mood Clinic Podcast! NEW!  Schema Circle MembershipWe have launched our new membership program!! Are you ready to go to the next level in your self-development using the clarity, wisdom and insights from Schema Therapy?  We'd love to have you join us.Have a look at  ALL our resources and products hereTHE RED FLAG PROJECT - ECOURSE FOR WOMENhttps://theredflagproject.com/https://www.facebook.com/theredflagproject2022/https://www.instagram.com/theredflagproject._/SCHEMA THERAPY FOR LIFEhttps://www.facebook.com/SchemaTherapyForLifehttps://www.instagram.com/schema_therapy_for_life/Contact us by email- justineandgemma@goodmood.com.auhttps://www.goodmood.com.au/podcast/Don't you hate this! You're had a first great date with someone and then it's all down hill from there.  What went wrong? In this episode Justine and Gemma put this issue under the microscope and dissect the anatomy of this all too common and disappointing senario.  

Welcome to another episode of The Good Mood Clinic Podcast!TRIGGER WARNING - Intimate partner abuse discussed and some sobering statistics of violence/sexual violence against woman are stated. NEW!  Schema Circle MembershipWe have launched our new membership program!! Are you ready to go to the next level in your self-development using the clarity, wisdom and insights from Schema Therapy?  We'd love to have you join us.Have a look at  ALL our resources and products hereTHE RED FLAG PROJECT - ECOURSE FOR WOMENhttps://theredflagproject.com/https://www.facebook.com/theredflagproject2022/https://www.instagram.com/theredflagproject._/SCHEMA THERAPY FOR LIFEhttps://www.facebook.com/SchemaTherapyForLifehttps://www.instagram.com/schema_therapy_for_life/Contact us by email- justineandgemma@goodmood.com.auhttps://www.goodmood.com.au/podcast/In today's episode we speak with Psychologist  Leanne Nunn who has recently completed her PhD research on  The Earliest Warning Signs of Intimate Partner Abuse.   Leanne has over twenty five years of experience as a psychologist in the clinical, management and training sectors.  She is also a PhD Student at the University of Tasmania focusing on intimate partner abuse (IPA). She has workedwith women that have experienced IPA or childhood abuse extensively throughout her career, both individually and in groups, across private practice, hospital and community settings. Summary of research findings:This qualitative research project focused on listening to the voices of survivors of IPA and identified four key findings:1) Women witnessed behaviours by the perpetrator early in the relationship that they felt were inappropriateor concerning or that they simply did not agree with. However, they did not label these behaviours as earlywarning signs of abuse, even when they were already very familiar with warning signs of abuse.2) When women witnessed these inappropriate behaviours, they compromised or pushed down their internalreactions to them.3) Every relationship included perpetrators' intense charm, pursuit, love or excitement.4) Every relationship included perpetrators' controlling behaviours that imposed limits on the victim-survivor.These findings suggest that the socialisation of women (including prioritising their partner's needs over their own, maintaining the relationship at all costs, and a hope to be ‘swept up' in their relationship) creates a foundation thatcan be manipulated by perpetrators to further enhance their abusive tactics.There are important implications of this research for primary prevention programs going forward.Contact for Psychologist  Leanne Nunn.http://www.lmnunn.com/Link to Leanne's bookhttp://www.lmnunn.com/books/