Tip Talk with Dr. Jennifer Degler

Are you part of the 7% of adult Americans who are experiencing a depressive episode this year? Psychologist Dr. Jennifer Degler shares what depression is and how you can treat it mind, body, and soul. In this Tip Talk episode, she focuses on body-centered techniques for overcoming depression, including getting 20 minutes of sunlight in your eyes daily, vigorous exercise, getting restorative sleep, nutrition, and anti-depressant medication. To download a free PDF of Dr. Jennifer's "Tips for Overcoming Depression," go to https://www.jenniferdegler.com/free-resources-tip-sheets/

Want to make your guy feel loved and appreciated? Psychologist Dr. Jennifer Degler shares tips for celebrating your husband by giving him what he needs, like letting him be your hero, asking for his advice, and joining him on an adventure. Pick one tip to apply and watch your man grow in confidence and your marriage thrive!

Men get so much confidence from being sexually desired by their wives. Pursue your man in the bedroom, and he'll slay dragons for you in the world. Psychologist Dr. Jennifer Degler gives practical tips to help a wife pursue her man sexually even if she doesn't feel much sexual desire herself. Sign up for the free CWIVES Dare of the Month newsletter at http://cwives.com to help you shift out of neutral sexually and into drive! http://cwives.com http://jenniferdegler.com

Need help making peace in your family? In this Tip Talk podcast episode, psychologist Dr. Jennifer Degler shares how to be a true peacemaker based on Abraham's example as he navigated a family dispute in Genesis 13. What is it that you could unselfishly yield in order to end a quarrel? "At the heart of every family quarrel is selfishness. What right could you yield in order to bring peace? God blesses those who work for peace... Genesis 5:9" "There's a time to dive in and help people. There's a time to step back and wait. Only prayer will tell you what time it is." To download a free PDF of Dr. Jennifer's Top Ten Tips for Building Strong Family Relationships, go to https://www.jenniferdegler.com/free-resources-tip-sheets/

If you'd like to connect more with family, in this Tip Talk episode psychologist Dr. Jennifer Degler shares ten tips for building strong family bonds. Listen for fresh ideas on how to more deeply connect and enjoy both your immediate and extended family, as well as celebrate one another, show physical affection, and embrace new family members. You can download a free PDF of this Top Ten Tips list on her website at http://jenniferdegler.com/free-resources/. "The family that plays together stays together. Shared laughter immediately eliminates distance between people, so take a shortcut to connection by having fun together." "Make the effort to show up. We all get exactly one opportunity to be there for someone’s once in a lifetime event." "Ban screens during meal times so everyone makes eye contact and feels heard and seen. We connect with what we look at, so look at your family, not a screen." Teach your children "In this family, we celebrate one another’s joys and mourn each other’s losses, and we never do the opposite." "Strong families are made up of imperfect people who will own their mess ups, apologize, ask for forgiveness while also forgiving themselves, and then work toward not repeating the same mistake. " "We weaken our family bonds when we withhold love until people measure up to exactly what we want them to be. Ask God to help you love everyone for who they are right now. " "An accelerated pace weakens family bonds and rushes us past those little moments where connections are made. People connect in the white spaces."

Can you recognize when you're being controlled and exploited so someone else can get what they want? Psychologist Dr. Jennifer Degler shares 5 more tips for identifying manipulators based on a fascinating and gruesome story from Judges 9. Manipulators: --Serve only themselves --Offer false security --Destroy what displeases them --Repeat patterns of using and deceiving. --Don't listen to God. "Often people who most desire power are the least deserving of it. Power is best wielded by those who live lives of genuine service." "Manipulators will promise you what you want most knowing full well they are not going to deliver it." "Manipulators repeat the same patterns of using and deceiving people. If they'll do it with you, they'll do it to you. Today you may be the favored one, but someday you'll be their victim." To download a free PDF of our "Top Ten Tips for Handling Emotional Manipulation," go to http://www.jenniferdegler.com/free-resources/ Check out our online store for resources to help you enjoy emotional and spiritual health, rewarding relationships, and sizzling married sex. http://jenniferdegler.com/store

Tips to help you sharpen your ability to spot a manipulator before you get played. Psychologist Dr. Jennifer Degler shares the first 5 of 10 tips for identifying manipulators based on a fascinating but gruesome story from Judges 9 in the Bible. Manipulators: 1) are all about self-promotion and image. 2) use deceptive appeals to get what they want. 3) rationalize sin to get their way. 4) drive people apart for personal gain. 5) surround themselves with corrupt people. "If your every step is all about promoting yourself and polishing your image, you're not on the road to spiritual success. Be humble or stumble." "Manipulators twist perception, limit your options, or downplay other options so their way seems like the only option you have." "There's no right way to do the wrong thing." To download the free Top Ten Tips for Handling Emotional Manipulation, go to https://www.jenniferdegler.com/free-resources/

If you're in or coming out of a relationship with a difficult, controlling person, in this Tip Talk episode psychologist Dr. Jennifer Degler has ten tips to help handle emotional manipulation and its after effects. It's time to quit trying to help and change the emotionally manipulative person. Instead, you can focus on developing your emotional manipulation detection and management skills. You can download a free PDF of this Top Ten Tips list on her website at http://jenniferdegler.com/free-resources/. The book she mentions is No More Christian Nice Girl: When Just Being Nice--Instead of Good--Hurts You, Your Family, and Your Friends. Available on her website, bookstores, and online retailers. "Be deaf to what people say and listen to what they do. The truth about people is found in their actions, not their words." "It's not your job to fix emotionally manipulative people. Your job is to maintain your safety and well-being." "If you feel worse about yourself or increasingly unclear about who you are after spending time with someone, you are likely being emotionally manipulated."

Is someone pulling your strings and emotionally manipulating you to get what they want while disregarding the effect on you? In this episode of Tip Talk, psychologist Dr. Jennifer Degler explains what emotional manipulation is and provides a list of tactics emotional manipulators use, including guilt trips, negative comparison, criticism, mind games, gas-lighting, denying, false concern, playing the victim, pressuring you to make quick decisions, temper tantrums, false accusations, threats, making excuses and rationalizing, hostile humor, evasiveness, forgetting, playing dumb, being habitually late, charm, flattery, the silent treatment, and triangulation. To download Dr. Jennifer's Top Ten Tips for Handling Emotional Manipulation, go to http://jenniferdegler.com and click on Free Resources. "Emotional manipulation is when you unfairly or deceptively influence, control, exploit, abuse, or coerce another person or situation for your own personal gain while disregarding the needs of the person or situation you are manipulating."

When should we pray and who can pray powerfully? Psychologist Dr. Jennifer Degler shares how Christians are to pray powerfully when we are in trouble, feeling blessed, sick, or have sinned. The prayer of a righteous person is powerful! Based on James 5. Are you stuck in a troubling situation? Pray "God, give me sustaining grace and eyes to see what you are developing in me through this problem that isn't going away." It feels good to nurse a grudge until we realize bitterness makes us physically sick. Say goodbye to your grudge and hello to health. To pray powerfully, we don't have to be perfect, but we do have to be right with God and right with people. "The prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective."

What's behind conflicts and quarrels? Psychologist Dr. Jennifer Degler explains how selfish desires and pride are behind every quarrel and the relational and spiritual consequences of unnecessary conflicts. Based on James 4. Are you in a quarrel? Ask your

Need to quit quarreling with someone? Psychologist Dr. Jennifer Degler provides practical tips and powerful prayers for ending a fight by humbly submitting to God, resisting the Devil's temptation to pride, drawing near to God in complete obedience, and both forgiving the other person and asking for forgiveness for your own wrong attitudes and actions.  Save yourself the cost of a counseling session by asking the other person, "What's it like to be in a relationship with me?" Then listen without explaining or defending why are you like that.  In a conflict? This submission prayer will help stop the quarreling. "God, I yield to you, your way, and what you want in this situation even if it means I don't get my way. God, you know best what's best here." In a conflict? This warfare prayer will help stop the quarreling. "God, please show me where and how Satan is stirring me up to give in to pride and selfishness, and show me how to firmly resist his temptation." In a conflict? This obedience prayer will help stop the quarreling. "God, please show me where I've edged you out and how to instead draw close to you with complete obedience to what you tell me to do." In a conflict? This forgiveness prayer will help stop the quarreling. "God, please show me my own wrong attitudes and actions. Forgive me and help me to forgive the other person and to ask for his or her forgiveness for my wrongdoing."

Psychologist Dr. Jennifer Degler shares tips for improving relationships based on James 3:13-18 including looking at whether our own arrogance, bitter envy, selfish ambition, or lack of wisdom is contributing to a chaotic or confusing relationship. Also covered are 8 characteristics to cultivate to improve relationships, including having pure motives, being peace-loving instead of a pot-stirrer, being considerate by not overreacting when someone messes up, being willing to yield in matters of opinion, being full of mercy and forgiveness, doing practical actions to help others, practicing impartiality, and being sincere and honest about our own mistakes.  "Knowledge can build a house, but it takes wisdom to build a home." "Without humility, we will believe we are human lie detectors. Only God can know another's person's heart." "Angrily giving someone 'a piece of your mind' doesn't promote peace. Plus you'll wish you had held on to all those pieces of your mind when you get older and can't remember why you walked into a room." 

Psychologist Dr. Jennifer Degler shares three more tips for managing the tongue based on James 3, including controlling your tongue's power for good, not evil; asking God to tame your tongue and purify its poison; and listening for what your tongue is revealing about your heart's condition.  "Controlling your tongue is always an uphill battle. You can't stop working on it, or you'll go backwards." "Out-of-control tongues can ruin in a moment what you've worked for years to build." "What we say reveals what we are like inside. Our words are a spiritual CT scan."

Psychologist Dr. Jennifer Degler shares three helpful tips for managing your tongue based on James 3:1-5, including: Using your tongue to benefit others, not glorify yourself; keeping your tongue in check instead of letting it run wild; and steering your your tongue in a godly direction, not toward destruction. Other topics include how to identify gossip and how your speech can either inflame your heart or direct it toward good. "An unchecked tongue is like running with scissors. Someone's going to get hurt." "If you share the private affairs of others for any other reason than to help or protect someone, you're gossiping--plain and simple."  "The ability to control your mouth is a sure sign of spiritual maturity."  "The inability to control your mouth is a sure sign of spiritual immaturity."  "Before you say "Hi" and let your words flow, THINK:  T   hi   N   K : Is it true? Is it necessary? Is it kind?"

Psychologist Dr. Jennifer Degler shares how we can be extraordinary followers of Christ in ordinary life based on James 1 -2. Topics include what being a "doer of the Word" looks like and the specific good works, inside and out, that saving faith produces in believers, such as: 1) Welcoming trials and challenges 2) Admitting we don't have all the answers and asking God for help 3) Accepting God's provision gladly 4) Determinedly resisting temptation 5) Controlling our tempers and tongues 6) Obeying God when He convicts us of sin 7) Responding to the needy 8) Treating the rich and the poor with equal consideration and courtesy.  "Are your actions speaking so loudly that no one can hear what you're saying?" "Good works don't justify us before God, but our good works justify our faith to the watching world."  

Psychologist Dr. Jennifer Degler shares three steps to finding comfort when you are afraid, anxious, or worried. Based on biblical principles found in Psalm 56. 1) Tell God your fears 2) Remind yourself that God is both with you and for You 3) Intentionally praise God for who He is and what He has done for you in the past.  "God doesn't despise your tears of grief, frustration, and fear. He carefully records and treasures each one of them." "Knowing that God is with you and for you will change your perspective on your fearful situation."  

In part 2 of a series on success, psychologist Dr. Jennifer Degler shares two more of God's strategies for success as seen in Joshua 1. First, to choose to be strong and courageous in the face of fear and obstacles, and second, to study and obey God's Word like your success depends on it--because it does!  "Faith isn't just believing in God, it is doing what God says. Your faith means nothing until it causes you to do something you wouldn't otherwise do." "It doesn't take courage to believe in God; it takes courage to obey God."

Psychologist Dr. Jennifer Degler shares two of God's strategies for success based on Joshua 1. First, let go of the past so you are ready for whatever God is calling you to in the present. Second, keep God's big picture in mind as you make every decision, and for believers, the big picture is always to become more like Jesus Christ.  "There's no retirement in God's kingdom, and it's never too late to start something new for Him." "Partial obedience leads to partial success. Full obedience leads to full success."

How do we help our children grow a heroic faith, one that will change lives? Psychologist Dr. Jennifer Degler interviews Lee Nienhuis, author of Brave Mom, Brave Kids, to hear Lee's helpful advice on how moms can surrender the common fears they have when it comes to their kids, and why we can entrust our children to God. They also discuss how to build your child's character. 

Psychologist Dr. Jennifer Degler shares the four things love always does: 1) Love always protects people; 2) Love always believes the best about people; 3) Love always hopes in the most hopeless of people; and 4) Love always perseveres by patiently enduring pain and problems. This is the 4th and final episode in our Loving Well series based on 1st Corinthians 13. For more info, go to http://jenniferdegler.com. 

Psychologist Dr. Jennifer Degler shares tips for overcoming rudeness, selfishness, irritability, perfectionism, score-keeping, and gloating in relationships. "Behind every irritable outburst is an unrealistic vision of perfection. Let it go. Love is not irritable." "Constantly reviewing your record of someone's wrongs will harden your heart more quickly than bacon ever could. Let it go. Love keeps no record of wrongs."   Based on 1st Corinthians 13:5-6. This is the 3rd podcast in the Loving Well series. For more info, go to http://jenniferdegler.com.

Psychologist Dr. Jennifer Degler shares tips for developing patience and showing kindness with others. She also discusses envy and jealousy and how to cultivate contentedness and trust instead. Lastly, she talks about the difference between healthy and unhealthy pride, and how to grow humble love in your heart. Based on 1st Corinthians 1:4. This is the 2nd podcast in the Loving Well series. For more info, go to http://jenniferdegler.com

Psychologist Dr. Jennifer Degler shares four negative consequences in relationships when we don't love well: 1) Our words are just noise to other people; 2) Our knowledge is useless to others; 3) Our faith means nothing to others and God; 4) Our sacrifices are empty to others and God. Tip: Learn to love well so your words, knowledge, faith, and sacrifices actually make a difference in your relationships and for God's kingdom. Based on 1st Corinthians 1:1-3. This is the first podcast in the Loving Well series. For more information, go to http://jenniferdegler.com

Dr. Jennifer Degler interviews Rachelle Starr, founder of Scarlet Hope, a Christian ministry to women in the adult entertainment industry. Rachelle shares how this Louisville, KY ministry started, how they serve meals to women working in strip clubs to show the love of Jesus, common misconceptions about sex trafficking and the dancers, and an inspiring story about one dancer who left the strip clubs behind with the help of Scarlet Hope. 

Psychologist Dr. Jennifer Degler interviews Dr. Juli Slattery about how single women can honor God with their sexuality and successfully navigate sexual temptation, what it means to be a sexual woman, and discover sexual healing and redemption.  

Psychologist Dr. Jennifer Degler and her guest, Ellie Kay of Heroes at Home, provide helpful tips on how to help military spouses and children, as well as reintegration advice for when a military spouse comes home after deployment. Includes "what not to say" to military spouses with a deployed spouse. 

Strategies for intentionally raising children to be "others-oriented," genuine, and caring instead of self-absorbed and selfish. Psychologist Dr. Jennifer Degler interviews Dave Stone, pastor of Southeast Christian Church in Louisville, KY, and author of How to Raise Selfless Kids in a Self-Centered World, and hears his parenting wisdom for teaching kids to honor others.

Practical tips on meeting a husband's need for physical intimacy, touch, and friendship. Psychologist Dr. Jennifer Degler interviews Erin Smalley about her book "10 Things a Husband Needs From His Wife," with sexual topics covered such as what keeps wives from enjoying sex and the benefits of sexual intimacy in marriage. 

Start or improve your quiet time with God by following these suggestions provided by Jane Roach, a former BSF (Bible Study Fellowship) director of training and teaching leader. Psychologist Dr. Jennifer Degler also interviews Jane about her experience of God's providence and her interactions with Wetherell Johnson, the late founder of BSF. For more powerful prescriptions for successful relationships, visit the Healthy Relationships Rx website here. 

Our guest, Dr. Leonard Sax, shares how to counteract the culture of disrespect that has infected many children and teens, how to wisely manage children's technology usage, and how to strengthen family bonds.

Do you think you have the right to make most of the decisions in a relationship? Do you insist on getting your own way? You may have an emotionally abusive attitude toward someone else or even be engaging in emotionally abusive behavior. Psychologist Dr. Jennifer Degler helps you determine if you are an emotional abuser and shares a story from her own marriage when she was emotionally abusive and controlling toward her husband in the area of finances.

Do you suspect you are or a friend is being emotionally abused? Can't figure out why you can't ever please that difficult other person? Psychologist Dr. Jennifer Degler provides warning signs that you or someone you care about is in an emotionally abusive relationship.

Can you spot an emotional abuser? Psychologist Dr. Jennifer Degler provides red flags for recognizing someone who is likely to be an emotionally abusive person.

Do you recognize emotional abuse when it happens in a relationship? Psychologist Dr. Jennifer Degler defines and gives examples of emotional and verbal abuse. Recognizing emotional abuse is the first step in eliminating it from your relationships.

As Mother's Day, Father's Day, and graduations approach, the loss of loved ones can feel especially painful. Psychologist Dr. Jennifer Degler interviews author and counselor, Yvonne Ortega, about losing her mother and son within weeks of one another. Yvonne offers helpful tips for coping with grief after losing multiple loved ones. This podcast is also excellent listening for anyone who wants to be a better comforter to those who grieve.

Does sex with your spouse only get the leftover time in your schedule? Are you having sex less frequently in your marriage than both of you would like? Psychologist Dr. Jennifer Degler gives helpful tips for updating your sexual routine so that physical intimacy gets prime time in your busy schedules. 

How do you know if an emotionally immature or verbally or physically abusive person has truly changed and is now safe to be in a relationship with? Psychologist Dr. Jennifer Degler gives 4 signs of personal accountability that indicate lasting change and relationship readiness.

Would you like to move past your losses? Psychologist Dr. Jennifer Degler offers helpful tips for finding God and His comfort in your loss and then moving on. This is the 3rd and final podcast in a series drawn from John 20.

Does God seem far away during your painful loss? Psychologist Dr. Jennifer Degler shares helpful tips for connecting with God while you are grieving a loss in this second podcast in a series drawn from John 20.

Have your losses made it seem like Jesus has disappeared? Psychologist Dr. Jennifer Degler gives helpful tips, drawn from Mary Magdalene's experiences at the empty tomb on the first Easter, for finding Jesus in your confusing and overwhelming circumstances.

Is your child struggling in school, and no one can figure out exactly what is wrong? Psychologist Dr. Jennifer Degler interviews Beth Degler who successfully faced the challenge of getting her dyslexic son correctly diagnosed, and now has helpful, encouraging tips for parents facing the same puzzling situation. 

Would you like to look forward to seeing your spouse at the end of the day? Psychologist Dr. Jennifer Degler gives helpful tips for having a 20 minute stress-reducing conversation with your spouse which will dramatically increase your emotional connection and deepen your friendship.

Want to take your marriage from fizzle to sizzle? Psychologist Dr. Jennifer Degler interviews J Parker, the author of Sex Savvy: A Lovemaking Guide for Christian Wives and the popular blog "Hot, Holy, and Humorous." J provides 4 tips for making married sex sizzle. To possibly win a free copy of Sex Savvy, go to the CWIVES website and leave a comment after the post with the link for the J Parker podcast "026 4 Tips for Making Married Sex Sizzle." The winner will be randomly chosen on May 1, 2014.

When someone wrongs you, are you able to confront them like Jesus would? Psychologist Dr. Jennifer Degler gives tips for confronting the sin of others in this third and final podcast in a 3-part series.

Unsure of how to confront somone when they've wronged you? In this second podcast in a series, Psychologist Dr. Jennifer Degler gives tips for confronting other people's sin in a healthy, biblical manner.

Has someone wronged you? Psychologist Dr. Jennifer Degler gives tips for handling the sin of others in a healthy, biblical manner.

Do you recognize emotional abuse when it happens to you? Psychologist Dr. Jennifer Degler gives tips for identifying emotional abuse in relationships, as well as personality traits that make people prone to overlooking or enabling abuse.

Men have 10 times more testosterone than women, so wives need to maximize the testosterone they do have for more sexual interest and pleasure. Psychologist Dr. Jennifer Degelr gives tips for making the most of a wife's limited testosterone supply so she is more interested in sex and enjoys sex more.

Are you a worrier? Psychologist Dr. Jennifer Degler shares tips for focusing on the concerns of today instead of anxiously worrying about the foggy future.

Are you or is a friend struggling with pornography? Psychologist Dr. Jennifer Degler interviews Mark and Angela Day, a married couple who offer hope and helpful tips for overcoming pornography addiction.