Podcast appearances and mentions of virginia sole smith

You are listening to Burnt Toast! Today, my guest is Elizabeth Ayiku. Elizabeth is a food justice organizer and founder of the Me Little Me Foundation, a nonprofit committed to advancing food equity and providing free, culturally competent support services for marginalized communities. Based in Los Angeles, Elizabeth works to dismantle the systemic barriers that affect mental health and wellbeing, emphasizing the importance of meeting basic needs first. Elizabeth's foundation draws its name from her debut feature film Me Little Me. The Me Little Me Foundation offers a free virtual food pantry for folks in need—with a focus on helping people with multiple marginalized identities, folks of color and folks in eating disorder recovery.And Burnt Toast, we have a challenge for you! We want to raise $6,000 to support the Me Little Me Foundation.If we hit that goal by June 1, Burnt Toast will match it with another $6,000 grant. You're going to hear more from Elizabeth in this episode about why this work is so important. Please share this episode widely, and donate if you can! Today's episode is free but if you value this conversation, please consider supporting our work with a paid subscription. Burnt Toast is 100% reader- and listener-supported. We literally can't do this without you.Episode 192 TranscriptElizabethSo I was born in the prairies of Canada to a Caribbean mother and West African father. I'm currently Los Angeles based. And I'm a filmmaker, a food justice organizer and a nonprofit founder.VirginiaThat is a lot of very hard jobs that you have! You sound extremely busy.ElizabethI am. It's a lot.VirginiaWell, we'll start with the film, because that's how we first got connected, when you were looking for sponsors for your really incredible film called Me Little Me. It came out in 2022, and it is available to stream on Amazon Prime and Apple TV. You were working on this for quite a long time. It was a the labor of love project for sure.ElizabethOh my goodness, 100 percent. It's based on my own lived experience. So, in 2009 I went to treatment for eating disorder recovery. I went to IOP—an intensive outpatient program—and I was also working full time while I did it.Being in eating disorder treatment became this kind of double life, and this big secret I had to hide. Because life couldn't stop, you know? And I guess that's something that I just never saw portrayed in any mainstream media, film, TV. It was always the person checked into inpatient. They had unlimited resources.VirginiaThousands and thousands of dollars per day for treatment.ElizabethAnd no mention of where this money was coming from. It was just this really nicely packaged perception of what recovery is. And I was just waiting and waiting to see something that had any semblance of what I'd gone through. And I just couldn't wait anymore! One day, I was like, “Okay, they're not doing it. I'm going to have to be the one to make it.” And that's what I did.Like you said, it was a labor of love. This is an indie film, 100 percent. We didn't have a studio backing us or anything like that. I just literally went to as many organizations as I could, and was like, “Look, I'm trying to make this. Can we have some money?” And it took a long time. We started shooting maybe the end of 2018 and 2019, before the pandemic. We started shooting principal photography, just getting the shots in. We ran out of money multiple times. There were so many challenges. So when I reached out to you, I was looking for finishing funds.I took a shot and submitted to South by Southwest as my work in progress. That means the sound wasn't done, the color wasn't finalized. It was 2021, by this time. And I was like, “You know what? I'm just going to shoot my shot and say I did it.” I was 100 percent sure nothing was going to come of it. But just to say that I did it. So end of 2021 I submitted and January 2022 is when they told me we were accepted. Still, I have to remind myself—I'm like, Oh my gosh, that happened.VirginiaYeah, you did it! You did the thing.ElizabethI did the thing! And then there were a whole bunch of other expenses that came with that. They needed a digital cinema package as a way to show the movie professionally, which was like a minimum $1500+. Plus, it still wasn't finished. So I just needed someone to do a quick color and sound pass. Because, my God, I couldn't just show the the work in progress. So we just did a quick, rough color and sound pass. And I had to hire someone to do that.I was grasping at straws. So when I reached out to you, I was just like, “This is what's happening. This is what the my need is. Any help would be so so appreciated,” and you were like, absolutely, let's do this.VirginiaThe story really resonated with me. As a journalist who's written about eating disorder recovery for two decades now, I'm very aware of that mainstream narrative that you were talking about and just how many people it doesn't represent. There is this whole eating disorder industrial complex that's built to sell a certain kind of recovery and center a certain thin, white girl narrative. And it just perpetually frustrates me, because everybody I know, whether personally in my own life, or people I've interviewed for work who has gone through recovery, is like, “Yeah, it doesn't look anything like that.”ElizabethNope. Not even a little bit.VirginiaAnd we're doing such a disservice to people! So the fact that you were going to tell this much more complex story, centering a Black woman—I was like, yes, thank you so much. ElizabethWhat you described is what I was up against, just this, all of those things. Trying to sell that story to the public, and if that's all people are offered, that's that's what they think the reality is.VirginiaAnd then that just pushes recovery so much further out of reach for people who wouldn't have access to that kind of treatment. Meaning the expensive inpatient treatment options, which also aren't even necessarily the best treatment! It doesn't work for everybody! Okay. We could have a whole other show about that.ElizabethWe really could. VirginiaThe point is, the film's incredible. It's out. I want everyone to go stream it now that they can. And what we really want to talk about today is how working on that film then led you to launch the Me Little Me Foundation.ElizabethWhile I was working on finishing the film, it was the middle of the pandemic. It was a hard time. The racial uprisings were happening all around us, and almost everyone I knew was traumatized by the world they were witnessing. And that combination — There was so much need, and people in my community and people I didn't know, people online were like. “I need resources, I need assistance, but I don't know where to turn.” It was too much to just ignore, you know? So that the subject matter of the film, plus the world that was happening at the time—I just knew there needed to be something in place that was different than the current resources out there.So I came up with the idea for a virtual food pantry where folks are approved up to a certain amount. They make a list of what they need. I shop for them online from a local grocery store that offers delivery, and the groceries are shipped to them for free. So you don't need to have a vehicle, you don't need to live in the correct zip code to get to the food pantry—because that's a thing. And you also get to choose how you want to nourish yourself, because that was important to me, too. Because there's dignity in being able to choose.VirginiaYes, and not just being handed a bag of food like, “This is what you get.”ElizabethYeah. “Be grateful, now move along.”So I wanted to help with the trauma, and the lack of resources. Cultural needs aren't taken into account at any food pantry I've ever used. I've been to so many pantries in my life, and it's a lot of white foods. Like, I don't know how else to describe them. And when you're having mental health issues because of trauma, because of the world around us, for whatever reason, just because you're struggling to make it, your cultural foods can be so comforting. They can just be so so comforting, and just what you need. And I just wanted to take that into consideration. So that's why I set it up the way I did, where folks tell me what they need, and that's what they get.VirginiaThere's such dignity in that, and empowerment for people. I think about the power of choice all the time, even just at the level of feeding my own kids. The idea that I would know what someone else needs to eat on any given day seems wild? I don't know what you're hungry for! I don't know what what you need right now. You know what you need right now. The fact that so many of our aid systems are not set up to honor that is a huge problem. So I love that you built that into into how you're doing this.You're focusing on folks of color who need assistance, and you're also focusing on folks in eating disorder recovery.ElizabethYeah, so basically folks who hold multiple marginalized identities are really who we serve the most. That's just how it honestly just started happening because of the people I'm connected with onlin,e and the places I was advertising this pantry. So many folks in recovery struggle with food security. Because the recovery models we were talking about earlier really emphasize “You need to always have food available.” You need to have snacks. So Recovery has been hard for them because that. Recovery has been hard for me because of that. I don't always have a cupboard full of snacks and multiple choices even though that's something in recovery that we're told to do. I'm laughing because they say, “Just make sure you fill your pantry.” Like everyone has a pantry! They're like, “fill your pantry with all the food you can.”VirginiaFirst, we need to get a pantry.ElizabethNumber one.VirginiaWhen does that get delivered?ElizabethExactly! So there are so many people in the recovery community telling us, “Oh my goodness, this is what I needed. Like, thank you so much. It's impossible to keep myself nourished without this assistance, this has been amazing.”Coming from that world, I couldn't have asked for a better outcome. It's beyond hard to recover in this world we're living in without assistance. So maybe 65 percent of who we serve are actively in recovery or currently have an eating disorder.And there is also a large population of folks with disabilities. People who are mobility impaired, or even young people and youth who don't have a car to get somewhere. There are so many folks with multiple marginalized identities who rely on us. It's beyond what I even thought.VirginiaAre you focusing on a particular geographic area?ElizabethGood question. It's nationwide. Because it's virtual—that's another thing I wanted to not be a barrier. If you can apply online, if you have access to computer at work—I'm trying for accessibility purposes to have another way to apply as well, but as of now, you apply online, and you can be anywhere. As long as you live somewhere that has a local grocery store that delivers, then you can use our services.VirginiaThat's really, really great. So as you're working in this food justice space… what you're doing is meeting an immediate critical need. People need to eat today. People are working on their recovery, they need access to food. And the reason this need is so dire is because of many larger structural failings in our systems. So how do you think about like, “Okay, I'm trying to put out this immediate fire. But we need so much larger change as well.” How do you kind of hold that together?ElizabethSometimes it does make me sad, because I'm like, “Oh, is this just a band aid for something systemic.” But I believe that what we're doing can eventually be just the way folks are given the resources they need. It doesn't need to be what we've always had. Why can't you just pick? Why does it have to be food that might not be good anymore? Expiring, not fresh, food that's offered? Why is that the only thing that we're saying is acceptable? So I'm really trying to get the word out that, hey, we're doing something that's working. And yes, it's for folks who are facing food insecurity now but you know, all these organizations that have these elaborate setups where they're pre-boxing things, you can do it a different way.VirginiaSo you're creating a new model that hopefully other organizations will replicate.ElizabethAbsolutely.VirginiaAs your organization continues to grow, this is something you can scale up, because of the way you've designed it. You're helping connect people to their local grocery store. This isn't you needing to build some whole infrastructure of warehouses, right?ElizabethExactly. That's eliminated. We don't have to pay rents to store a bunch of boxed items. I don't think people are looking at things like that with the current systems that are in place.VirginiaAnd obviously, it would be amazing if programs like SNAP and welfare were providing more resources for folks. But given the current political climate, we're going to be lucky to hold onto any social safety net we have left. ElizabethLike, any. And that's the same how I was saying earlier. Like, middle of pandemic, people were just so traumatized. People were just kind of numb. And like, “I don't know what to do, I need food to eat, though.” I'm seeing it now again, like this year the same. I'm like, whoa. This is history repeating.VirginiaI think people are feeling a lot of the same panic, embarrassment, and uncertainty about what's happening next. Everything is feeling extremely unstable.ElizabethAbsolutely.VirginiaSo making sure people have a way to feed themselves today—it's something we can do. There is all this bigger change that needs to happen, and we can contribute to that however we can. But this kind of direct aid to people getting fed today is something that we can do, and really is crucial right now. We can't do the rest if people aren't eating. This is the starting point.I mean, I've worked on pieces about childhood hunger over the years, and I know you're focusing more on adults, but it blows my mind how often organizations that work on hunger have to show research to convince people that kids can't learn if they're hungry. And it's just like, why did we need to have to do a study? Why did you need data?ElizabethYes, they need to see the numbers. It's fascinating to me. When I tell folks stuff based on my lived experience of going to pantries, not having enough, or not having access in the area. They're like, “Oh, okay, we just need you to type that all up, and we need to see where you got that data.” And I'm just like…where I got that data? From my life! And so many people I know! That blows my mind, the amount of data folks are requesting when it comes to food insecurity.VirginiaWe shouldn't have to explain it or justify it. It should just be obvious that people need enough food to eat. That's the baseline.So Burnt Toast, we have a mission!Our goal is to raise $6,000 by June 1 for the Me Little Me Foundation to support the virtual free food pantry project. When we reach that $6,000 goal, Burnt Toast (the newsletter and podcast) will match that with another $6,000. So we have a chance to raise $12,000 for Me Little Me to help them make a big push on this work.Elizabeth, tell us a little bit about what those funds will mean for your organization. What are we going to help you do? And then, of course, what do folks need to do to donate?ElizabethOh, my goodness. It would just help us so immensely. Just to break it down: $100 worth of groceries means folks can make a minimum of 20 home cooked meals. So if we raise $6,000 that's literally 1200 home cooked meals that we could provide.VirginiaThat's awesome.ElizabethIt would help us so much, because we always have more applications than the resources. It's crushing. Applications will be open for 24 hours and we have to shut them down because we're just so overwhelmed. And say, “I'm so sorry. Please try back next quarter.” I'm trying to raise more money. I'm not going to let you all down. So it would help us immensely. I'm trying to play it cool. This is my cool and collected voice, but I'm sort of squealing inside.VirginiaWell, I think what you're doing is so important. And we have over 65,000 people on the Burnt Toast list! This is not a big ask for anyone. A few bucks will cover one of these meals that we're trying to raise money for. If you have 100 bucks, great! That's 20 meals you've covered. This is the kind of community effort that is giving me hope right now, that's making me feel like the entire world's not falling off a cliff. We can get this done. And I think actually, we can exceed this goal.The second piece of our challenge is: If you're able, please become a monthly donor! Whether that's $5 a month or $100 a month—which would buy 20 meals a month! Do it! We are setting a goal to add 25 new recurring donors to the Me Little Me rosters. Burnt Toast is already a recurring donor, but we want 25 of you to sign up to be a recurring donors, too. So take whatever gift you were going to give and divide it by 12; break it up monthly and donate that. Because recurring donations are really critical to organizations like this. Elizabeth, you can speak a little bit to why that matters so much.ElizabethBecause the need is ongoing. We're inundated every time we open the pantry, and the recurring donations will help us reach our ultimate goal of being able to see real systemic change and have this just be something that's in place. So of course, yes, please if you're able to just give a few dollars we would love that. But if you can support us on a monthly basis in any capacity, it'll just be such a big weight off of the shoulders of so many folks who rely on these services.VirginiaRecurring donations help nonprofits plan. It's money they can rely on and actually look ahead and not just be scrambling. ElizabethScramble—that's the perfect word. I get a little stressed every time we open the pantry.VirginiaWell, I am really excited. I really appreciate you reaching out and giving us this opportunity to support what you're doing. I think it's so meaningful and so important. And, Burnt Toast, let's get it done. This section contains affiliate links. Thanks for supporting Burnt Toast when you shop our links! ButterElizabethSomething I discovered, I think by accident, is painting on burlap—like the material that they make sacks out of. It's so random. They sell it at craft stores. And there was just some on sale. So I have just regular paints at home from ages ago that I just didn't want to throw away. And, yeah, I just started. I stuck some burlap on a piece of wood, and just started painting it. And it just was so soothing. Just the surface of it, the texture, just painting over the burlap. And I was like, oh my gosh. Do people know about this?VirginiaI did not! This is amazing.ElizabethSo not painting on canvas, but on burlap material. Even if you make a mistake, it still looks nice. VirginiaWhat kind of paint are you using?ElizabethIt was literally paint that you would get at a hardware store, like if you were painting a wall in your house. They have specific fabric paint—because I'm going down a rabbit hole with it now—but that works just fine. Like, if you go to a hardware store and get a sample size, that's what I had. I had a bunch of little samples. so I just started painting words on the burlap and making little gift things. And it was just so soothing. So that's just a really random activity.VirginiaThat's a great Butter. Thank you. I've been noticing a little trend with guests lately, where a lot of the Butters are people are really drawn to something that gets them off their phone, off the computer, kind of like an absorbing project. Absorbing projects have been a trend in butters, and I am a big fan. I'm a big jigsaw puzzle person and gardener. Like these tactile things that get us out of our heads a little bit are just great.ElizabethOh, wonderful. Oh, I'm so glad to hear that.VirginiaMy Butter is going to be somewhat related, and it's a repeat Butter. I've recommended it before, but we have this great bird feeder. It's called the Bird Buddy, and it has a camera in it, so it takes pictures of the birds for you and sends them to your phone. It's not cheap, but they do go on sale from time to time. I will link to it. But anyway, we moved the feeders to a new part of the garden, and we hung up our hummingbird feeder and another type of feeder—and just all of the birds that are coming now are making me so happy.ElizabethI can imagine!VirginiaI'm That Mom now. I'm like, “Guys, there are more goldfinches! Have you seen the goldfinches??” And one of my kids loves birds, and one of them doesn't care. So I'm being a little excessive, and they're like, okay, yes, we see. But I think it's the same thing of — I'm needing beauty that's not in the Internet. That's taking me away. And they're so soothing to watch. So bird feeders, specifically, the camera one is really fun, but bird feeders in general, is my Butter today.ElizabethOh, now I want to see the photos of the birds.VirginiaOh, I'll send you some. It's pretty exciting. Elizabeth, thank you so much. Let's just remind everyone again, how to support you, how to donate to Me Little Me. ElizabethYou can go to MeLittleMeFoundation.org and there's a donate page where you can make a one time donation or become a recurring donor. You can get updates on our Instagram. You can also get updates about my film at Me Little Me Film on Instagram.The Burnt Toast Podcast is produced and hosted by Virginia Sole-Smith (follow me on Instagram) and Corinne Fay, who runs @SellTradePlus, and Big Undies.The Burnt Toast logo is by Deanna Lowe.Our theme music is by Farideh.Tommy Harron is our audio engineer.Thanks for listening and for supporting anti-diet, body liberation journalism! This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit virginiasolesmith.substack.com/subscribe

This is a free preview of a paid episode. To hear more, visit virginiasolesmith.substack.comYou're listening to Burnt Toast!We are Virginia Sole-Smith and Corinne Fay, and it's time for your May Indulgence Gospel!Today, fan favorite Brianna Campos joins us again to talk more about… fat dating and sex!We're answering your questions, like:⭐️ How do you navigate certain positions in bigger bodies?⭐️ How do you talk to new partners about what your body needs?⭐️ Are “oral sex skills” a myth?⭐️ And…who is Virginia dating now?To hear the full story, you'll need to be a paid Burnt Toast subscriber. Subscriptions are $7 per month or $70 for the year.If you're already a paid subscriber, you can add on a subscription to Big Undies, Corinne's newsletter about clothes, for 20% off.You can always listen to our episodes right here in your email, where you'll also receive full transcripts (edited and condensed for clarity). But please also follow us in Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Stitcher, and/or Pocket Casts!This transcript contains affiliate links. Shopping our links is a great way to support Burnt Toast!Episode 191 TranscriptVirginiaOkay, for anyone who missed her last visit: Bri is a licensed professional counselor and body image coach who works with folks recovering from eating disorders and finding body acceptance through grief. She joined me on the podcast back in February to talk about her work and her experiences dating in a superfat body, and you all loved that conversation so much.We have asked Bri to join us again, this time to help Corinne and I answer your questions. So welcome Bri!BriThank you so much for having me back. What an honor.VirginiaWell we have some very spicy questions to discuss today. I hope you're feeling ready.BriI'm so ready.CorinneIn today's episode, we're going to talk very practically about the mechanics of fat sex. Some of the questions are pretty graphic, so you might not want to listen to this one with kids around. You may not even want to listen with friends around!!!! And if you're related to anyone who is on the podcast today, you may not want to listen to this episode!!!VirginiaI would say, you are strongly encouraged to skip this one, actually.CorinneMoms, siblings.VirginiaDads, brothers, whatever. More content for you is coming. This one isn't it.BriWe appreciate the support.CorinneOkay, here's question number one:My cis male partner and I (a cis female) have been together eight years. We have both gained belly weight in that time, and now missionary is tricky, especially if I need to use a hand to stimulate my clit. Plus, it's harder for him to get as deep with bellies in the way. We've tried, him standing/me on the edge of the bed, him kneeling, and my hips up and other variations. I've been thinking about a wedge pillow, but that definitely takes the spontaneity out of it. Any tips?BriI mean, I'll dive right in.

You are listening to Burnt Toast!Today, my guest is Jessica Slice, a disabled mom and author of the brilliant new book, Unfit Parent: A Disabled Mother Challenges an Inaccessible World.Jessica is also the co-author of Dateable: Swiping Right, Hooking Up, and Settling Down While Chronically Ill and Disabled, and This Is How We Play: A Celebration of Disability and Adaptation, as well as the forthcoming This Is How We Talk and We Belong. She has been published in The New York Times, The Washington Post, Alice Wong's bestselling Disability Visibility and more.As Jessica puts it, she originally wrote this book for disabled parents because their stories are not told or centered. But Jessica soon realized she was writing a book for all parents, because becoming a parent is its own kind of experience with disability.There are so many important intersections between disability, justice and fat liberation. One that I think about a lot is how both groups come up against the question: Don't we owe it to our kids to be healthy? Jessica's perspective on these issues is expansive, inclusive and enlightening. I know you will get so much out of this conversation and from reading unfit parent.You can take 10 percent off Unfit Parent, or any book we talk about on the podcast, if you order it from the Burnt Toast Bookshop, along with a copy of Fat Talk! (This also applies if you've previously bought Fat Talk from them. Just use the code FATTALK at checkout.)PS. If you enjoy today's conversation, please tap the heart on this post — likes are one of the biggest drivers of traffic from Substack's Notes, so that's a super easy, free way to support the show!Follow Jessica: Jessicaslice.com. I'm on Instagram @JessicaSlice, I have a Substack where I send monthly notes about Disabled Parenting, and then usually try to get people to read whatever poem I'm fixated on that month.The Burnt Toast Podcast is produced and hosted by Virginia Sole-Smith (follow me on Instagram) and Corinne Fay, who runs @SellTradePlus, and Big Undies.The Burnt Toast logo is by Deanna Lowe.Our theme music is by Farideh.Tommy Harron is our audio engineer.Thanks for listening and for supporting anti-diet, body liberation journalism! This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit virginiasolesmith.substack.com/subscribe

This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit virginiasolesmith.substack.com/subscribeYou're listening to Burnt Toast!We are Virginia Sole-Smith and Corinne Fay, and it's time for your April Extra Butter.Today we're talking about plus size influencers getting weight loss surgery. We'll get into:⭐️ Is this the start of the Ozempic backlash?⭐️ How much do public figures owe their audiences?⭐️ How to hold space for body autonomy with weight loss journeys.This is a complicated conversation! To hear the whole thing, read the full transcript, and join us in the comments, you'll need to join Extra Butter, our premium subscription tier.Subscriptions are $99 per year — but if you're already a regular paid subscriber, you'll only pay the difference.In these monthly episodes, we get into the GOOD stuff like:Is Mel Robbins a Diet?Dating While FatWhat to do when you miss your smaller bodyIs Kids Eat In Color anti-diet?And did Virginia really get divorced over butter?Extra Butters also get exclusive weekly chats, DM access, and a monthly bonus essay or thread. And Extra Butter ensures that the Burnt Toast community can always stay an ad- and sponsor-free space—which is crucial for body liberation journalism. Join us here!(Questions? Glitches? Email Virginia all the details, and cc support@substack.com.)PS. If Extra Butter isn't the right tier for you, remember that you still get access behind almost every other paywall with a regular paid subscription.If you're already a paid subscriber, you can add on a subscription to Big Undies, Corinne's newsletter about clothes, for 20% off.PS. You can always listen to our episodes right here in your email, where you'll also receive full transcripts (edited and condensed for clarity). But please also follow us in Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Stitcher, and/or Pocket Casts!

You're listening to Burnt Toast!We are Virginia Sole-Smith and Corinne Fay, and it's time for your April Indulgence Gospel! Subscribe nowThese episodes are usually only for paid subscribers but we're releasing this one for free! If you like it, you can get even more Virginia by becoming a paid Burnt Toast subscriber — and then you'll get even more Corinne, because paid Burnt Toasties can take 20% off their Big Undies subscription!Bundle with Big Undies!There has been so much conversation in online spaces over the past few months about divesting from social media. Folks are dropping X, Facebook, Instagram as a form of protest against billionaire tech bros like Elon Musk and Mark Zuckerberg. And a lot of us are also feeling the need to doom scroll less as a form of self care. Plus, when Tiktok drops a new Chubby filter, it doesn't really make us want to be there. So today we're chatting about how we're both feeling about social media. What are we divesting from? How's it going? And does any of this feel like a diet?Kmatta, Getty ImagesPS. You can always listen to our episodes right here in your email, where you'll also receive full transcripts (edited and condensed for clarity). But please also follow us in Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Stitcher, and/or Pocket Casts! This transcript does contain affiliate links; shopping our links is a great way to support Burnt Toast! This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit virginiasolesmith.substack.com/subscribe

This is a free preview of a paid episode. To hear more, visit virginiasolesmith.substack.comYou're listening to Burnt Toast!We are Virginia Sole-Smith and Corinne Fay, and it's time for a bonus March Indulgence Gospel!Today we're chatting about:⭐️ How to talk to your kids about (your) weight loss and/or GLP-1 use.⭐️ How to handle medically-advised diets without getting…diet-y.⭐️Our favorite leggings (we stand by all these recs!)⭐️Dealing with haters… and more!To hear the full story, you'll need to be a paid Burnt Toast subscriber. Subscriptions are $7 per month or $70 for the year.If you're already a paid subscriber, you can add on a subscription to Big Undies, Corinne's newsletter about clothes, for 20% off.You can always listen to our episodes right here in your email, where you'll also receive full transcripts (edited and condensed for clarity). But please also follow us in Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Stitcher, and/or Pocket Casts!Today's episode is a rerun; we're bringing you episode 100, which ran in June 2023—such a simpler time! But we had a really valuable conversation about how to talk to kids about body changes, especially if you're losing weight on Ozempic and we thought it might be a helpful one to revisit now. Plus there is our usual smattering of assorted random Indulgence Gospel topics. And dahlias! Enjoy.PS. This transcript does contain affiliate links; shopping our links is a great way to support Burnt Toast!

This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit virginiasolesmith.substack.com/subscribeYou're listening to Burnt Toast!We are Virginia Sole-Smith and Corinne Fay, and it's time for your March Extra Butter.Today we're talking about Dr. Becky Kennedy, the beloved parenting influencer. We'll get into:⭐️ The Dr. Becky mantra that Virginia uses…often.⭐️Why you don't need to cook dinner for your kids at 3pm.⭐️ The infamous “school nurse call” post.⭐️ Is Dr. Becky — and parenting content more broadly— a diet or diet-adjacent?To hear this episode, you do need to be an Extra Butter subscriber!Subscriptions are $99 per year — but if you're already a regular paid subscriber, you'll only pay the difference.In these monthly episodes, we get into the GOOD stuff like:Is Mel Robbins a Diet?Dating While FatWhy all the fat influencers are getting skinnyAnd…did Virginia really get divorced over butter?Extra Butters also get exclusive weekly chats, DM access, and a monthly bonus essay or thread. And Extra Butter ensures that the Burnt Toast community can always stay an ad- and sponsor-free space—which is crucial for body liberation journalism. Join us here!(Questions? Glitches? Email Virginia all the details, and cc support@substack.com.)PS. If Extra Butter isn't the right tier for you, remember that you still get access behind almost every other paywall with a regular paid subscription.

You're listening to Burnt Toast!We are Virginia Sole-Smith and Corinne Fay, and it's time for your March Indulgence Gospel!Indulgence Gospel episodes are usually only for paid subscribers but we're releasing this one for free! If you like it, you can get even more Virginia by becoming a paid Burnt Toast subscriber — and then you'll get even more Corinne, because paid Burnt Toasties can take 20% off their Big Undies subscription!Today we're chatting about:⭐️ Navigating fitness spaces designed for smaller bodies!⭐️ Feelings about hair color!⭐️ Do Virginia and Corinne like sports now?

You're listening to Burnt Toast!I'm Virginia Sole-Smith, and today my guest is Amy Palanjian.Amy is my work wife and best friend of over 20 years. She's also the creator of Yummy Toddler Food and author of the nationally bestselling cookbook Dinnertime SOS: 100 Sanity-Saving Meals Parents and Kids of All Ages Will Actually Want to Eat.Amy joined me last month at Split Rock Books to celebrate the launch of FAT TALK in paperback. They also host the Burnt Toast Bookshop for us, and are forever the place to get my books signed and personalized however you like!So we talked about the book, of course, but we also got into how family dinners have changed for us post-divorce, why cooking with kids is terrible, and then Amy outed my (not so) secret love of protein powder.

Today Virginia is chatting with Brianna Campos. Bri is a licensed professional counselor and body image coach who works with folks recovering from eating disorders, and finding body acceptance through grief. You may know Bri from Instagram, or from her newsletter, Body Image with Bri.Bri and I talk about why this concept of body grief is so important—and yet so often overlooked in this work. And she shares how doing her own body grief work has led her to have a happier relationship with her body and to start dating again—confidently and with a lot of joy as a superfat person. If you find today's episode valuable, please consider supporting our work with a paid subscription!Guest interviews are always free on Burnt Toast, but paid subscriptions enable us to pay guests for their time, labor and expertise. (This is extremely rare in the world of podcasting, but key to centering marginalized voices!)To tell us YOUR thoughts, and to get all of the links and resources mentioned in this episode, as well as a complete transcript, visit our show page.If you want more conversations like this one, please rate and review us in your podcast player! And become a paid Burnt Toast subscriber — subscriptions are just $7 per month! —to get all of Virginia's reporting and bonus subscriber-only episodes. And don't forget to check out our Burnt Toast Podcast Bonus Content! Disclaimer: You're listening to this episode because you value my input as a journalist who reports on these issues and therefore has a lot of informed opinions. Neither my guest today nor I are healthcare providers, and this conversation is not meant to substitute for medical or therapeutic advice.FAT TALK is out in paperback! Order your signed copy from Virginia's favorite independent bookstore, Split Rock Books (they ship anywhere in the US!). Or order it from your independent bookstore, or from Barnes & Noble, Amazon, Target, or Kobo or anywhere else you like to buy books. You can also order the audio book from Libro.fm or Audible.CREDITSThe Burnt Toast Podcast is produced and hosted by Virginia Sole-Smith and Corinne Fay. Follow Virginia on Instagram, Follow Corinne  @SellTradePlus, an Instagram account where you can buy and sell plus size clothing and subscribe to Big Undies.Our theme music is by Farideh.Tommy Harron is our audio engineer.Thanks for listening and for supporting anti-diet, body liberation journalism.  This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit virginiasolesmith.substack.com/subscribe

This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit virginiasolesmith.substack.com/subscribeYou're listening to Burnt Toast!We are Virginia Sole-Smith and Corinne Fay, and it's time for your February Indulgence Gospel.Today we're talking about Mel Robbins! We're going to get into:⭐️ Is Mel Robbins diet culture or anti-diet? Is she just Andrew Huberman for the We Can Do Hard Things crowd?⭐️ Corinne & Virginia's difference of opinion⭐️ The big Mel Robbins controversy⭐️ Will we start high fiving ourselves in the mirror?To hear our discussion, you'll need to be a paid Burnt Toast subscriber. Subscriptions are $7 per month or $70 for the year.

Today Virginia is chatting with Helen Rosner. Helen is a staff writer at The New Yorker. She has been covering food for more than a decade as a writer and editor, and won a 2024 James Beard Award for her weekly restaurant-review column, The Food Scene. She is an expert on sandwiches and many other important subjects. And I had the absolute pleasure of chatting with Helen last month at Books Are Magic in Brooklyn (hi Emma Straub thank you so much for having us!!), at a live event to celebrate the paperback release of Fat Talk. (They should still have a few signed copies in stock if you need one!)We talked about the book, of course, but we talked about so many other fat- and food-adjacent topics, that I knew I wanted to bring it to you as a podcast episode.(Bear with some imperfect audio, since we weren't recording with our usual set-up — but Tommy worked his magic as usual so it's still highly listen-to-able!)If you find today's episode valuable, please consider supporting our work with a paid subscription!Guest interviews are always free on Burnt Toast, but paid subscriptions enable us to pay guests for their time, labor and expertise. (This is extremely rare in the world of podcasting, but key to centering marginalized voices!)To tell us YOUR thoughts, and to get all of the links and resources mentioned in this episode, as well as a complete transcript, visit our show page.If you want more conversations like this one, please rate and review us in your podcast player! And become a paid Burnt Toast subscriber — subscriptions are just $7 per month! —to get all of Virginia's reporting and bonus subscriber-only episodes. And don't forget to check out our Burnt Toast Podcast Bonus Content! Disclaimer: You're listening to this episode because you value my input as a journalist who reports on these issues and therefore has a lot of informed opinions. Neither my guest today nor I are healthcare providers, and this conversation is not meant to substitute for medical or therapeutic advice.FAT TALK is out in paperback! Order your signed copy from Virginia's favorite independent bookstore, Split Rock Books (they ship anywhere in the US!). Or order it from your independent bookstore, or from Barnes & Noble, Amazon, Target, or Kobo or anywhere else you like to buy books. You can also order the audio book from Libro.fm or Audible.CREDITSThe Burnt Toast Podcast is produced and hosted by Virginia Sole-Smith and Corinne Fay. Follow Virginia on Instagram, Follow Corinne  @SellTradePlus, an Instagram account where you can buy and sell plus size clothing and subscribe to Big Undies.Our theme music is by Farideh.Tommy Harron is our audio engineer.Thanks for listening and for supporting anti-diet, body liberation journalism.  This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit virginiasolesmith.substack.com/subscribe

This is a free preview of a paid episode. To hear more, visit virginiasolesmith.substack.comYou're listening to Burnt Toast!We are Virginia Sole-Smith and Corinne Fay, and it's time for your February Indulgence Gospel.Today we're updating you on our great experiment: How did we do with 30 days of NO AMAZON? We're going to get into:⭐️ Why did we quit Amazon in the first place?⭐️ Is quitting Amazon a diet—or at least, diet culture-adjacent?⭐️ What was our biggest fail?⭐️ Will we keep going???To hear the full story, you'll need to be a paid Burnt Toast subscriber. Subscriptions are $7 per month or $70 for the year.To get all of the links and resources mentioned in this episode, as well as a complete transcript, visit our show page.Also, don't forget to order Fat Talk: Parenting In the Age of Diet Culture! Get your signed copy now from Split Rock Books (they ship anywhere in the USA). You can also order it from your independent bookstore, or from Barnes & Noble, Amazon, Target, Kobo or anywhere you like to buy books. (Or get the UK edition or the audiobook!) Disclaimer: Virginia and Corinne are humans with a lot of informed opinions. They are not nutritionists, therapists, doctors, or any kind of healthcare providers. The conversation you're about to hear and all of the advice and opinions they give are just for entertainment, information, and education purposes only. None of this is a substitute for individual medical or mental health advice.CREDITSThe Burnt Toast Podcast is produced and hosted by Virginia Sole-Smith (follow me on Instagram) and Corinne Fay, who runs @SellTradePlus, and Big Undies—subscribe for 20% off! The Burnt Toast logo is by Deanna Lowe.Our theme music is by Farideh.Tommy Harron is our audio engineer.Thanks for listening and for supporting anti-diet, body liberation journalism!

Today Virginia is chatting with Frankie De La Cretaz.  Frankie is an award-winning journalist whose work sits at the intersection of sports, gender and culture. They are the co-author of Hail Mary, the rise and fall of the National Women's Football League, and their writing has been featured in The New York Times, Sports Illustrated, The Atlantic and more.Frankie also writes Out of Your League, a newsletter about queer sports and pop culture, which I consider a must-subscribe. If you have been remotely following the issues of trans women in sports, you likely already know how well Frankie calls out that bias and discrimination. As Frankie points out, the way bodies are policed and controlled in the sports world is really just a microcosm of how the bodies of queer, trans, and otherwise marginalized folks are being policed and controlled throughout our culture right now.So even if you think you don't care about sports, I promise you'll care about this conversation.If you find today's episode valuable, please consider supporting our work with a paid subscription!Guest interviews are always free on Burnt Toast, but paid subscriptions enable us to pay guests for their time, labor and expertise. (This is extremely rare in the world of podcasting, but key to centering marginalized voices!)To tell us YOUR thoughts, and to get all of the links and resources mentioned in this episode, as well as a complete transcript, visit our show page.If you want more conversations like this one, please rate and review us in your podcast player! And become a paid Burnt Toast subscriber — subscriptions are just $7 per month! —to get all of Virginia's reporting and bonus subscriber-only episodes. And don't forget to check out our Burnt Toast Podcast Bonus Content! Disclaimer: You're listening to this episode because you value my input as a journalist who reports on these issues and therefore has a lot of informed opinions. Neither my guest today nor I are healthcare providers, and this conversation is not meant to substitute for medical or therapeutic advice.FAT TALK is out in paperback! Order your signed copy from Virginia's favorite independent bookstore, Split Rock Books (they ship anywhere in the US!). Or order it from your independent bookstore, or from Barnes & Noble, Amazon, Target, or Kobo or anywhere else you like to buy books. You can also order the audio book from Libro.fm or Audible.CREDITSThe Burnt Toast Podcast is produced and hosted by Virginia Sole-Smith and Corinne Fay. Follow Virginia on Instagram, Follow Corinne  @SellTradePlus, an Instagram account where you can buy and sell plus size clothing and subscribe to Big Undies.Our theme music is by Farideh.Tommy Harron is our audio engineer.Thanks for listening and for supporting anti-diet, body liberation journalism.  This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit virginiasolesmith.substack.com/subscribe

This is a free preview of a paid episode. To hear more, visit virginiasolesmith.substack.comYou're listening to Burnt Toast!We are Virginia Sole-Smith and Corinne Fay, and it's time for your January Indulgence Gospel.It's time for another mailbag episode, so we'll be answering questions like:⭐️ Is it anti-fatness to care that your partner eats faster than you?⭐️ What ultra processed foods can we not live without?⭐️ What should you do when your friend starts weight loss drugs for “wardrobe” reasons?⭐️ Did Virginia buy the air fryer and if so, what is she air frying?To hear our answers, you'll need to be a paid Burnt Toast subscriber. Subscriptions are $7 per month or $70 for the year.If you're already a paid subscriber, you can add on a subscription to Big Undies, Corinne's newsletter about clothes, for 20% off.To get all of the links and resources mentioned in this episode, as well as a complete transcript, visit our show page.Also, don't forget to order Fat Talk: Parenting In the Age of Diet Culture! Get your signed copy now from Split Rock Books (they ship anywhere in the USA). You can also order it from your independent bookstore, or from Barnes & Noble, Amazon, Target, Kobo or anywhere you like to buy books. (Or get the UK edition or the audiobook!) Disclaimer: Virginia and Corinne are humans with a lot of informed opinions. They are not nutritionists, therapists, doctors, or any kind of healthcare providers. The conversation you're about to hear and all of the advice and opinions they give are just for entertainment, information, and education purposes only. None of this is a substitute for individual medical or mental health advice.PS. You can always listen to our episodes right here in your email, where you'll also receive full transcripts (edited and condensed for clarity). But please also follow us in Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Stitcher, and/or Pocket Casts!This episode contains affiliate links. Shopping our links is a great way to support Burnt Toast! You'll find all of the links aggregated here.The Burnt Toast Podcast is produced and hosted by Virginia Sole-Smith (follow me on Instagram) and Corinne Fay, who runs @SellTradePlus, and Big Undies—subscribe for 20% off!The Burnt Toast logo is by Deanna Lowe.Our theme music is by Farideh.Tommy Harron is our audio engineer.Thanks for listening and for supporting anti-diet, body liberation journalism!

You're listening to Burnt Toast!We are Virginia Sole-Smith and Corinne Fay, and today we're getting into our Ins and Outs for 2025.Most Indulgence Gospel episodes are paywalled, but we're releasing today's conversation for free as a January-has-been-a-lot-aleady treat!If you enjoy this conversation, please consider supporting our work with a paid subscription.You can also subscribe to Corinne's newsletter, Big Undies, for 20% off using this special link. To get all of the links and resources mentioned in this episode, as well as a complete transcript, visit our show page.Also, don't forget to order Fat Talk: Parenting In the Age of Diet Culture! Get your signed copy now from Split Rock Books (they ship anywhere in the USA). You can also order it from your independent bookstore, or from Barnes & Noble, Amazon, Target, Kobo or anywhere you like to buy books. (Or get the UK edition or the audiobook!) Disclaimer: Virginia and Corinne are humans with a lot of informed opinions. They are not nutritionists, therapists, doctors, or any kind of healthcare providers. The conversation you're about to hear and all of the advice and opinions they give are just for entertainment, information, and education purposes only. None of this is a substitute for individual medical or mental health advice.The Burnt Toast Podcast is produced and hosted by Virginia Sole-Smith (follow me on Instagram) and Corinne Fay, who runs @SellTradePlus, and Big Undies—subscribe for 20% off!The Burnt Toast logo is by Deanna Lowe.Our theme music is by Farideh.Tommy Harron is our audio engineer.Thanks for listening and for supporting anti-diet, body liberation journalism! This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit virginiasolesmith.substack.com/subscribe

This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit virginiasolesmith.substack.com/subscribeWelcome to Indulgence Gospel After Dark! It's time for your January Extra Butter! Today, we're tackling two big topics:1. Can you do a diet-y thing and still be an anti-diet advocate?2. And can Corinne and Virginia divest from Amazon for one month?(Or is that…also kind of diet-y???)If you are already an Extra Butter subscriber, you'll have this entire episode in your podcast feed and access to the entire transcript in your inbox and on the Burnt Toast Substack. To get all of the links and resources mentioned in this episode, as well as a complete transcript, visit our show page.Otherwise, to hear the whole conversation or read the whole transcript, you'll need to join Extra Butter. It's just $99 per year, and is the hands down best way to keep Burnt Toast an ad- and sponsor-free space. PS. Don't forget to order Fat Talk: Parenting In the Age of Diet Culture! Get your signed copy now from Split Rock Books (they ship anywhere in the USA). You can also order it from your independent bookstore, or from Barnes & Noble, Amazon, Target, Kobo or anywhere you like to buy books. (Or get the UK edition or the audiobook!) Disclaimer: Virginia and Corinne are humans with a lot of informed opinions. They are not nutritionists, therapists, doctors, or any kind of healthcare providers. The conversation you're about to hear and all of the advice and opinions they give are just for entertainment, information, and education purposes only. None of this is a substitute for individual medical or mental health advice.CREDITSThe Burnt Toast Podcast is produced and hosted by Virginia Sole-Smith (follow me on Instagram) and Corinne Fay, who runs @SellTradePlus and Big Undies—subscribe for 20% off.The Burnt Toast logo is by Deanna Lowe.Our theme music is by Farideh.Tommy Harron is our audio engineer.Thanks for listening and for supporting anti-diet, body liberation journalism!

This episode originally aired on July 30, 2024. In this throwback episode, Ricki speaks with writer Virginia Sole-Smith. Virginia was a skinny teenager who became a fat adult. She now writes about anti-fat bias, from finding clothes to accessing medical care. On this episode, hear Ricki open up about her own weight journey as she and Virginia talk about how weight discrimination shows up across the fat spectrum, how to let your kids make their own decisions about what they put in their bodies, and whether or not Ricki herself has contributed to fatphobia. Get ready for one of the most open and honest conversations about weight you’ve ever heard. Check out Virginia’s books, Fat Talk: Parenting in the Age of Diet Culture and The Eating Instinct: Food Culture, Body Image, and Guilt in America. Subscribe to Virginia’s Substack newsletter, Burnt Toast. Follow Ricki Lake @rickilake on Instagram. And stay up to date with us @LemonadaMedia on X, Facebook, and Instagram. For a list of current sponsors and discount codes for this and every other Lemonada show, go to lemonadamedia.com/sponsors. Joining Lemonada Premium is a great way to support our show and get bonus content. Subscribe today at bit.ly/lemonadapremium. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

You're listening to Burnt Toast!We are Virginia Sole-Smith and Corinne Fay, and we're dropping in today with your Burnt Toast Podcast Year In Review.Don't forget! Burnt Toast subscriptions are 20% off right now — but that deal ends tomorrow night. Don't miss it!And if you haven't donated to our NAAFA fundraiser yet, we could really use your help funding fat.You can always listen to our episodes right here in your email, where you'll also receive full transcripts (edited and condensed for clarity). But please also follow us in Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Stitcher, and/or Pocket Casts!The Burnt Toast Podcast is produced and hosted by Virginia Sole-Smith (follow me on Instagram) and Corinne Fay, who runs @SellTradePlus, and Big Undies—subscribe for 20% off!The Burnt Toast logo is by Deanna Lowe.Our theme music is by Farideh.Tommy Harron is our audio engineer.Thanks for listening and for supporting anti-diet, body liberation journalism! This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit virginiasolesmith.substack.com/subscribe

This is a free preview of a paid episode. To hear more, visit virginiasolesmith.substack.comIt's time for your December Indulgence Gospel. Today's episode is both holiday and sex-themed, which seems right! We're getting into:️ How diet culture and anti-fatness show up during the holiday season. Comments from relatives! Fitness equipment as gifts! Matching family PJs! Etc.️ Our NEW Ask Corinne segment, where Corinne answers your fat sex and dating questions, like: What do you do when certain positions just don't work for your body?To hear the whole conversation or read the whole transcript, you'll need to become a paid Burnt Toast subscriber. Subscribe here.If you are already a paid subscriber, you'll have this entire episode in your podcast feed and access to the entire transcript in your inbox and on the Burnt Toast Substack. You can also subscribe to Corinne's newsletter, Big Undies, for 20% off using this special link. To get all of the links and resources mentioned in this episode, as well as a complete transcript, visit our show page.Also, don't forget to order Fat Talk: Parenting In the Age of Diet Culture! Get your signed copy now from Split Rock Books (they ship anywhere in the USA). You can also order it from your independent bookstore, or from Barnes & Noble, Amazon, Target, Kobo or anywhere you like to buy books. (Or get the UK edition or the audiobook!) Disclaimer: Virginia and Corinne are humans with a lot of informed opinions. They are not nutritionists, therapists, doctors, or any kind of healthcare providers. The conversation you're about to hear and all of the advice and opinions they give are just for entertainment, information, and education purposes only. None of this is a substitute for individual medical or mental health advice.CREDITSThe Burnt Toast Podcast is produced and hosted by Virginia Sole-Smith (follow me on Instagram) and Corinne Fay, who runs @SellTradePlus, and Big Undies—subscribe for 20% off! The Burnt Toast logo is by Deanna Lowe.Our theme music is by Farideh.Tommy Harron is our audio engineer.Thanks for listening and for supporting anti-diet, body liberation journalism!

Today Virginia is chatting with Anna Maltby. Anna is a health journalist, editor, content strategist, personal trainer, and author of the newsletter How to Move. Anna also created Pilates For Abortion Funds, a monthly online class that has raised about $30,000 for abortion funds since July 2022. She has been an ACE-certified personal trainer since 2015, and a certified mat pilates instructor since 2021. She's also a certified prenatal and postpartum exercise specialist. Anna lives in Brooklyn with her husband, two kids, and two extremely cute cats.Anna was previously a guest on one of Burnt Toast's most popular ever episodes, The Myth of Visible Abs. What's so great about Anna—and what makes her different from a lot of fitness writers and personal trainers out there—is that she's so smart about bodies, she's truly anti-diet and size neutral as a fitness professional…and, she's been in the belly of the beast. Anna worked in women's magazines with me long enough to know all the diet culture tricks. So she's one of my favorite people to talk fitness with, because she can dissect what is marketing, what is diet culture, and what is actually maybe useful for your body.Two content warnings for today:1. We are going to talk about specific forms of exercise. This will always be through a weight neutral lens, but if you're recovering from an eating disorder or just otherwise in a place where exercise is not serving you, please take care.2. CW for Butter, because we ended up talking quite a lot about toilets! And while I feel it's all incredibly practical information and you're going to thank me for my great Butter recommendation this week, I do realize that toilet conversation is not for everyone. It's usually not for me! So I get it! You've been warned.To tell us YOUR thoughts, and to get all of the links and resources mentioned in this episode, as well as a complete transcript, visit our show page.If you want more conversations like this one, please rate and review us in your podcast player! And become a paid Burnt Toast subscriber — subscriptions are just $7 per month! —to get all of Virginia's reporting and bonus subscriber-only episodes. And don't forget to check out our Burnt Toast Podcast Bonus Content! Disclaimer: You're listening to this episode because you value my input as a journalist who reports on these issues and therefore has a lot of informed opinions. Neither my guest today nor I are healthcare providers, and this conversation is not meant to substitute for medical or therapeutic advice.FAT TALK is out in paperback! Order your signed copy from Virginia's favorite independent bookstore, Split Rock Books (they ship anywhere in the US!). Or order it from your independent bookstore, or from Barnes & Noble, Amazon, Target, or Kobo or anywhere else you like to buy books. You can also order the audio book from Libro.fm or Audible.CREDITSThe Burnt Toast Podcast is produced and hosted by Virginia Sole-Smith and Corinne Fay. Follow Virginia on Instagram, Follow Corinne  @SellTradePlus, an Instagram account where you can buy and sell plus size clothing and subscribe to Big Undies.Our theme music is by Farideh.Tommy Harron is our audio engineer.Thanks for listening and for supporting anti-diet, body liberation journalism.  This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit virginiasolesmith.substack.com/subscribe

This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit virginiasolesmith.substack.com/subscribeWelcome to Indulgence Gospel After Dark! It's time for your December Extra Butter! Today, we're talking about bellies—and how we've been taught to dress them. You need this conversation if you have feelings about:SpanxHorizontal stripesThe Millennial structured camisole era + long, flowy topsAlways tucking in your shirt/never tucking in your shirtAnd so much more.If you are already an Extra Butter subscriber, you'll have this entire episode in your podcast feed and access to the entire transcript in your inbox and on the Burnt Toast Substack. To get all of the links and resources mentioned in this episode, as well as a complete transcript, visit our show page.Otherwise, to hear the whole conversation or read the whole transcript, you'll need to join Extra Butter. It's just $99 per year, and is the hands down best way to keep Burnt Toast an ad- and sponsor-free space. PS. Don't forget to order Fat Talk: Parenting In the Age of Diet Culture! Get your signed copy now from Split Rock Books (they ship anywhere in the USA). You can also order it from your independent bookstore, or from Barnes & Noble, Amazon, Target, Kobo or anywhere you like to buy books. (Or get the UK edition or the audiobook!) Disclaimer: Virginia and Corinne are humans with a lot of informed opinions. They are not nutritionists, therapists, doctors, or any kind of healthcare providers. The conversation you're about to hear and all of the advice and opinions they give are just for entertainment, information, and education purposes only. None of this is a substitute for individual medical or mental health advice.CREDITSThe Burnt Toast Podcast is produced and hosted by Virginia Sole-Smith (follow me on Instagram) and Corinne Fay, who runs @SellTradePlus and Big Undies—subscribe for 20% off.The Burnt Toast logo is by Deanna Lowe.Our theme music is by Farideh.Tommy Harron is our audio engineer.Thanks for listening and for supporting anti-diet, body liberation journalism!

For a moment last year, it seemed like there were two types of people: those desperate for a Stanley Cup Quencher, and those who did not understand the craze around these cups at all. Headlines abounded about the 40-ounce water vessel's popularity, and so did memes poking fun at the people — mostly women — who partook in the trend. As we head into another holiday shopping season, journalist Virginia Sole Smith helps Endless Thread understand WaterTok, the social media trend that pushed the Stanley Cup into the big time, and what it might tell us about the next item to flood our feeds. Show notes: Yes, Mermaid Water is a Diet (Burnt Toast) Why Does Anybody Need 37 Stanley Cups? (The Wall Street Journal) The latest TikTok weight loss trend is … hacking water? (Vox) Credits: This episode was produced by Grace Tatter. Mix and sound design by Paul Vaitkus. It was hosted by Ben Brock Johnson, Grace Tatter and Amory Sivertson.

This is a free preview of a paid episode. To hear more, visit virginiasolesmith.substack.comIt's time for your November Indulgence Gospel. Today, we're doing an old fashioned mailbag episode for you.We are going to chat about grocery shopping.We're going to talk about what to do if you are “not fat enough” to be in a fat space.We are going to talk about how to get divorced.We're going to talk about a mom who wants to stop her adult daughter from getting diabetes.And we're both going to dig into our phones and face up to…just how much time we spend on them and why.To hear the whole conversation or read the whole transcript, you'll need to become a paid Burnt Toast subscriber. Subscribe here.If you are already a paid subscriber, you'll have this entire episode in your podcast feed and access to the entire transcript in your inbox and on the Burnt Toast Substack. You can also subscribe to Corinne's newsletter, Big Undies, for 20% off using this special link. To get all of the links and resources mentioned in this episode, as well as a complete transcript, visit our show page.Also, don't forget to order Fat Talk: Parenting In the Age of Diet Culture! Get your signed copy now from Split Rock Books (they ship anywhere in the USA). You can also order it from your independent bookstore, or from Barnes & Noble, Amazon, Target, Kobo or anywhere you like to buy books. (Or get the UK edition or the audiobook!) Disclaimer: Virginia and Corinne are humans with a lot of informed opinions. They are not nutritionists, therapists, doctors, or any kind of healthcare providers. The conversation you're about to hear and all of the advice and opinions they give are just for entertainment, information, and education purposes only. None of this is a substitute for individual medical or mental health advice.CREDITSThe Burnt Toast Podcast is produced and hosted by Virginia Sole-Smith (follow me on Instagram) and Corinne Fay, who runs @SellTradePlus, and Big Undies—subscribe for 20% off! The Burnt Toast logo is by Deanna Lowe.Our theme music is by Farideh.Tommy Harron is our audio engineer.Thanks for listening and for supporting anti-diet, body liberation journalism!

This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit virginiasolesmith.substack.com/subscribeWelcome to Indulgence Gospel After Dark! It's time for your November Extra Butter! This month we're talking about Emily Oster—and her evolving views on kids, weight and health.We recorded this before the election. But as we all continue to grapple with how America slid to the right, the story of a public health advocate and scholar who is now aligned with conservative media feels especially timely. That said, we also want to hold space for how much Emily's work has meant to so many of us (including Virginia!).If you are already an Extra Butter subscriber, you'll have this entire episode in your podcast feed and access to the entire transcript in your inbox and on the Burnt Toast Substack. To get all of the links and resources mentioned in this episode, as well as a complete transcript, visit our show page.Otherwise, to hear the whole conversation or read the whole transcript, you'll need to join Extra Butter. It's just $99 per year, and is the hands down best way to keep Burnt Toast an ad- and sponsor-free space. PS. Don't forget to order Fat Talk: Parenting In the Age of Diet Culture! Get your signed copy now from Split Rock Books (they ship anywhere in the USA). You can also order it from your independent bookstore, or from Barnes & Noble, Amazon, Target, Kobo or anywhere you like to buy books. (Or get the UK edition or the audiobook!) Disclaimer: Virginia and Corinne are humans with a lot of informed opinions. They are not nutritionists, therapists, doctors, or any kind of healthcare providers. The conversation you're about to hear and all of the advice and opinions they give are just for entertainment, information, and education purposes only. None of this is a substitute for individual medical or mental health advice.CREDITSThe Burnt Toast Podcast is produced and hosted by Virginia Sole-Smith (follow me on Instagram) and Corinne Fay, who runs @SellTradePlus and Big Undies—subscribe for 20% off.The Burnt Toast logo is by Deanna Lowe.Our theme music is by Farideh.Tommy Harron is our audio engineer.Thanks for listening and for supporting anti-diet, body liberation journalism!

Today Virginia is chatting withMara Gordon, MD.Dr. Gordon is a family physician on the faculty of Cooper Medical School of Rowan University, as well as a writer, journalist, and contributor to NPR. Dr. Gordon also writes Chief Complaint, about her efforts to make medicine more fat friendly, and help her patients and herself explore body liberation and radical bodily autonomy.In our conversation today, Dr. Gordon and I get into why the healthcare system is set up the way it is, and what we can do to advocate for more weight-inclusive care—even when we're not seeing weight-inclusive doctors.She also answers your questions about common weight-linked health conditions like acid reflux, sleep apnea, and prediabetes.To tell us YOUR thoughts, and to get all of the links and resources mentioned in this episode, as well as a complete transcript, visit our show page.If you want more conversations like this one, please rate and review us in your podcast player! And become a paid Burnt Toast subscriber — subscriptions are just $7 per month! —to get all of Virginia's reporting and bonus subscriber-only episodes. And don't forget to check out our Burnt Toast Podcast Bonus Content! Disclaimer: You're listening to this episode because you value my input as a journalist who reports on these issues and therefore has a lot of informed opinions. Neither my guest today nor I are healthcare providers, and this conversation is not meant to substitute for medical or therapeutic advice.FAT TALK is out! Order your signed copy from Virginia's favorite independent bookstore, Split Rock Books (they ship anywhere in the US!). Or order it from your independent bookstore, or from Barnes & Noble, Amazon, Target, or Kobo or anywhere else you like to buy books. You can also order the audio book from Libro.fm or Audible.CREDITSThe Burnt Toast Podcast is produced and hosted by Virginia Sole-Smith and Corinne Fay. Follow Virginia on Instagram, Follow Corinne  @SellTradePlus, an Instagram account where you can buy and sell plus size clothing and subscribe to Big Undies.The Burnt Toast logo is by Farideh.Our theme music is by Jeff Bailey and Chris Maxwell.Tommy Harron is our audio engineer.Thanks for listening and for supporting anti-diet, body liberation journalism.  This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit virginiasolesmith.substack.com/subscribe

Welcome back to the podcast, everyone! I'm very glad you're here. I've been reading a book called “Fat Talk: Parenting in the Age of Diet Culture” by Virginia Sole-Smith and even though I'm just a third of the way through it, it floors me every time I turn the page. The author is talking about the effects anti-fat bias can have on families and she shares some stories that break my heart. Imagine if your child was taken away from you because they're fat. Just simply because of their body size. This nightmare was real for some families and I want to talk about weight discrimination and how harmful it can be.    One of the cases talked about in the book was the case of Anamarie Regino, a girl who was removed from her parents at a young age because of her size. State authorities decided her weight was a form of child abuse or neglect so they took her away. Anamarie's parents fought back and argued that she had an undiagnosed medical condition that contributed to her size but it took months of court battle to return her to her family. I want to talk about how interventions like this and even well-intentioned health initiatives like Michelle Obama's “Let's Move” campaign, which heavily emphasized the “epidemic” of childhood obesity, contribute to stigma and harm. I explore the myth that a child's weight is the parent's fault, the messages that being fat is inherently dangerous that are sent by interventions like Anamarie's, and the impact all the discourse on weight and a specific mold of physical health has on children. So join me as I dive into why we need to speak out against anti-fat bias. __About Dr. Michelle Tubman:Dr. Michelle Tubman is certified by the American Board of Obesity Medicine, which means she understands exactly what's happening in your body when you diet. Although she does not provide any medical advice in her coaching programs, this knowledge gives her an edge over most coaches.She also holds Level 1 and Level 2 Precision Nutrition coaching certifications which make her skilled at coaching nutrition, dietary change, and habit change in general. Realizing that emotional eating and bingeing are complicated for most of us, she also did training in mind-body and intuitive eating. Peace around food is possible.__Resources discussed in this episode:“Fat Talk: Parenting in the Age of Diet Culture” by Virginia Sole-Smith__Learn more about Dr. Michelle Tubman and Wayza Health:Website: www.wayzahealth.comFollow me on Facebook and InstagramEmail Michelle: michelle@wayzahealth.com

When last we left Angela and Brian and Rickie and Rayanne and all their friends, they were in the early days of 1995 and at a point of no return in their teen lives. So what's happened to them in the intervening 30 years? On this week's episode, we have a reunion episode of sorts, with a roundup of past guests speculating on where the characters might have found themselves. And then James and I explore a few more possibilities -- from talking cars to communes to a secret relationship with J.D. Salinger, anything's possible.- 80s TV Ladies: https://www.80stvladies.com - Ryan O'Connor: https://www.instagram.com/ryanoconnor1981 - Virginia Sole-Smith: https://virginiasolesmith.com - Kerri Doherty and H. Alan Scott on Out on the Lanai: https://www.patreon.com/goldengirlspodcast/about- Drew Droege: https://www.instagram.com/drew_droege - Guy Branum: https://guybranum.com - BenDeLaCreme: https://www.bendelacreme.com - Trevor with Media Processing: https://www.youtube.com/@mediaprocessingchannel- Sam Pirie: https://www.instagram.com/sampvevo

Today Virginia is chatting with Amy Palanjian. You probably already know Amy as Yummy Toddler Food, which is her blog/Instagram/Tiktok. She's also the bestselling author of Dinnertime SOS, and writes a great bi-weekly newsletter called YTF Community, which comes with super helpful meal plans. Some of you may have listened to our old podcast, Comfort Food, or maybe you've just heard Amy on her previous appearances on Burnt Toast (one, two and three). But we realized that Amy hasn't been on the pod since we both got divorced! Obviously a lot in our lives has changed, but specifically, a lot has changed in terms of how we feed our people and how we feed ourselves.So this is an episode about single mom dinner. I think you'll enjoy it.To tell us YOUR thoughts, and to get all of the links and resources mentioned in this episode, as well as a complete transcript, visit our show page. If you want more conversations like this one, please rate and review us in your podcast player! And become a paid Burnt Toast subscriber — subscriptions are just $7 per month! —to get all of Virginia's reporting and bonus subscriber-only episodes. And don't forget to check out our Burnt Toast Podcast Bonus Content! Disclaimer: You're listening to this episode because you value my input as a journalist who reports on these issues and therefore has a lot of informed opinions. Neither my guest today nor I are healthcare providers, and this conversation is not meant to substitute for medical or therapeutic advice.FAT TALK is out! Order your signed copy from Virginia's favorite independent bookstore, Split Rock Books (they ship anywhere in the US!). Or order it from your independent bookstore, or from Barnes & Noble, Amazon, Target, or Kobo or anywhere else you like to buy books. You can also order the audio book from Libro.fm or Audible.CREDITSThe Burnt Toast Podcast is produced and hosted by Virginia Sole-Smith and Corinne Fay. Follow Virginia on Instagram, Follow Corinne  @SellTradePlus, an Instagram account where you can buy and sell plus size clothing and subscribe to Big Undies.The Burnt Toast logo is by Farideh.Our theme music is by Jeff Bailey and Chris Maxwell.Tommy Harron is our audio engineer.Thanks for listening and for supporting anti-diet, body liberation journalism.  This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit virginiasolesmith.substack.com/subscribe

This is a free preview of a paid episode. To hear more, visit virginiasolesmith.substack.comIt's time for your October Indulgence Gospel. And today… we're going to look back at all of our Butters!If you're new here, Butter is the recommendation segment that runs at the end of every podcast episode. Butter is sometimes things you can buy, but it can also be a show or book we love, something great that we ate, a current mood, etc. Butter is any small moment of joy. (It can also, ofc, be literal butter, which we all know to be synonymous with joy.) But sometimes joy is fleeting!So today, paid subscribers get to hear which Butters have stood the test of time:Is Virginia still wearing her trad wife dress?Does Corinne still love her $100 baseball hat?Are we still into the bra that made us break up with underwire?Plus a few low-key life-changing household appliances, Virginia's favorite thing about her bedroom, and what we're definitely going to STOP recommending from now on… To hear the whole conversation or read the whole transcript, you'll need to become a paid Burnt Toast subscriber. Subscribe here.If you are already a paid subscriber, you'll have this entire episode in your podcast feed and access to the entire transcript in your inbox and on the Burnt Toast Substack. You can also subscribe to Corinne's newsletter, Big Undies, for 20% off using this special link. To get all of the links and resources mentioned in this episode, as well as a complete transcript, visit our show page. Also, don't forget to order Fat Talk: Parenting In the Age of Diet Culture! Get your signed copy now from Split Rock Books (they ship anywhere in the USA). You can also order it from your independent bookstore, or from Barnes & Noble, Amazon, Target, Kobo or anywhere you like to buy books. (Or get the UK edition or the audiobook!) Disclaimer: Virginia and Corinne are humans with a lot of informed opinions. They are not nutritionists, therapists, doctors, or any kind of healthcare providers. The conversation you're about to hear and all of the advice and opinions they give are just for entertainment, information, and education purposes only. None of this is a substitute for individual medical or mental health advice.CREDITSThe Burnt Toast Podcast is produced and hosted by Virginia Sole-Smith (follow me on Instagram) and Corinne Fay, who runs @SellTradePlus, and Big Undies—subscribe for 20% off! The Burnt Toast logo is by Deanna Lowe.Our theme music is by Farideh.Tommy Harron is our audio engineer.Thanks for listening and for supporting anti-diet, body liberation journalism!

Today Virginia is chatting with the delightful Julia Turshen! Julia is a New York Times bestselling cookbook author, and today we're celebrating her brand new cookbook What Goes With What. WGWW is built on the simple premise that if we understand what makes food delicious, we can feed ourselves well. Nobody understands this better than Julia, who has been excavating the rules, limitations, and hidden diet mindset of food writing for years now, and in doing so, offers us all a better, more straightforward way to think about food and making meals happen.If you have ever felt overwhelmed by the deeply loaded question of “What's for dinner?” Julia's work is a safe place to start figuring it all out.You can order What Goes With What through the Burnt Toast Bookshop. Don't forget, you can always take 10 percent off that purchase if you also order (or have already ordered!) Fat Talk from Split Rock Books! (Just use the code FATTALK at checkout.)To tell us YOUR thoughts, and to get all of the links and resources mentioned in this episode, as well as a complete transcript, visit our show page. If you want more conversations like this one, please rate and review us in your podcast player! And become a paid Burnt Toast subscriber to get all of Virginia's reporting and bonus subscriber-only episodes. Disclaimer: Virginia is a journalist and human with a lot of informed opinions. Virginia is not a nutritionist, therapist, doctor, or any kind of health care provider. The conversation you're about to hear and all of the advice and opinions she and her guests give are just for entertainment, information, and education purposes only. None of this is a substitute for individual medical or mental health advice.FAT TALK is out! Order your signed copy from Virginia's favorite independent bookstore, Split Rock Books (they ship anywhere in the US!). Or order it from your independent bookstore, or from Barnes & Noble, Amazon, Target, or Kobo or anywhere else you like to buy books. You can also order the audio book from Libro.fm or Audible.CREDITSThe Burnt Toast Podcast is produced and hosted by Virginia Sole-Smith and Corinne Fay. Follow Virginia on Instagram, Follow Corinne  @SellTradePlus, an Instagram account where you can buy and sell plus size clothing and subscribe to Big Undies.The Burnt Toast logo is by Deanna Lowe.Our theme music is by FaridehTommy Harron is our audio engineer.Thanks for listening and for supporting anti-diet, body liberation journalism.  This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit virginiasolesmith.substack.com/subscribe

This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit virginiasolesmith.substack.com/subscribeWelcome to Indulgence Gospel After Dark! It's time for your October Extra Butter! This month we're diving into some big, hard questions, like:How do you mourn big body changes?What happens if your body size really is the reason you can't do something you used to love?Does the “Health At Every Size” framework ever fail fat people?When is it systemic oppression and when is it just…physics?Or…do we all just need a Fat Day?If you are already an Extra Butter subscriber, you'll have this entire episode in your podcast feed and access to the entire transcript in your inbox and on the Burnt Toast Substack. To get all of the links and resources mentioned in this episode, as well as a complete transcript, visit our show page. Otherwise, to hear the whole conversation or read the whole transcript, you'll need to join Extra Butter. It's just $99 per year, and is the hands down best way to keep Burnt Toast an ad- and sponsor-free space. PS. Don't forget to order Fat Talk: Parenting In the Age of Diet Culture! Get your signed copy now from Split Rock Books (they ship anywhere in the USA). You can also order it from your independent bookstore, or from Barnes & Noble, Amazon, Target, Kobo or anywhere you like to buy books. (Or get the UK edition or the audiobook!) Disclaimer: Virginia and Corinne are humans with a lot of informed opinions. They are not nutritionists, therapists, doctors, or any kind of healthcare providers. The conversation you're about to hear and all of the advice and opinions they give are just for entertainment, information, and education purposes only. None of this is a substitute for individual medical or mental health advice.CREDITSThe Burnt Toast Podcast is produced and hosted by Virginia Sole-Smith (follow me on Instagram) and Corinne Fay, who runs @SellTradePlus and Big Undies—subscribe for 20% off.The Burnt Toast logo is by Deanna Lowe.Our theme music is by Farideh.Tommy Harron is our audio engineer.Thanks for listening and for supporting anti-diet, body liberation journalism!

This is a free preview of a paid episode. To hear more, visit virginiasolesmith.substack.comIt's time for your Indulgence Gospel! And today we're talking all things Fat Travel!We'll be answering your questions, sharing travel hacks, and just getting into the nitty gritty of how to be a fat person going places in the world.And so much more!To hear the whole conversation or read the whole transcript, you'll need to become a paid Burnt Toast subscriber. Subscribe here.If you are already a paid subscriber, you'll have this entire episode in your podcast feed and access to the entire transcript in your inbox and on the Burnt Toast Substack. You can also subscribe to Corinne's newsletter, Big Undies, for 20% off using this special link. To get all of the links and resources mentioned in this episode, as well as a complete transcript, visit our show page. Also, don't forget to order Fat Talk: Parenting In the Age of Diet Culture! Get your signed copy now from Split Rock Books (they ship anywhere in the USA). You can also order it from your independent bookstore, or from Barnes & Noble, Amazon, Target, Kobo or anywhere you like to buy books. (Or get the UK edition or the audiobook!) Disclaimer: Virginia and Corinne are humans with a lot of informed opinions. They are not nutritionists, therapists, doctors, or any kind of healthcare providers. The conversation you're about to hear and all of the advice and opinions they give are just for entertainment, information, and education purposes only. None of this is a substitute for individual medical or mental health advice.CREDITSThe Burnt Toast Podcast is produced and hosted by Virginia Sole-Smith (follow me on Instagram) and Corinne Fay, who runs @SellTradePlus, and Big Undies—subscribe for 20% off! The Burnt Toast logo is by Deanna Lowe.Our theme music is by Farideh.Tommy Harron is our audio engineer.Thanks for listening and for supporting anti-diet, body liberation journalism!

I know I say this a lot, but I love today's conversation, and I have no doubt you're going to find it fascinating. I speak with Registered Dietician Nutritionist Shana Minei Spence, who describes herself as an “all foods fit” dietician. Shana works in public health and is the author of the new book, Live Nourished: Make Peace with Food, Banish Body Shame, and Reclaim Joy. Shana and I explore how we can find more peace and freedom around food through examining our conditioned beliefs around health, nutrition, diet, weight, processed foods, and more. There are so many juicy nuggets of insight in this conversation, and I think you'll walk away feeling more liberated from a food system/culture that is insidiously controlling and often feels confusing. After all, we are all hardwired to intuitively nourish ourselves, even though it often doesn't feel that way (as Shana says, without diet culture, intuitive eating would just be called eating!).Episode Links:*Mind, Body, Spirit, FOOD newsletter: https://mindbodyspiritfood.substack.com/*Find Nicki on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/nickisizemore/* Shana's book, Live Nourished: https://amzn.to/3N33gIX* Shana's Newsletter, The Nutrition Tea Substack: https://thenutritiontea.substack.com/* Find Shana on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thenutritiontea/* Podcast referenced with Virginia Sole-Smith: https://mindbodyspiritfood.substack.com/p/podcast8* Podcast referenced with Abigail Rose Clarke: https://mindbodyspiritfood.substack.com/p/abigail-rose-clarke This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit mindbodyspiritfood.substack.com/subscribe

Today Virginia is chatting with Claire Ayoub. Claire is the writer and director of the brand new feature film—opening tomorrow!!— called Empire Waist, a heartfelt comedy about teens learning to love their bodies through fashion design and friendship. Empire Waist opens in movie theaters across the country tomorrow, September 27! Go to empirewaistfilm.com for screening info, or set an alert on Fandango. You can also download the Empire Waist Curriculum at empirewaistfilm.com/curriculum. And follow empirewaistfilm on Instagram.To tell us YOUR thoughts, and to get all of the links and resources mentioned in this episode, as well as a complete transcript, visit our show page. If you want more conversations like this one, please rate and review us in your podcast player! And become a paid Burnt Toast subscriber — subscriptions are just $7 per month! —to get all of Virginia's reporting and bonus subscriber-only episodes. And don't forget to check out our Burnt Toast Podcast Bonus Content! Disclaimer: You're listening to this episode because you value my input as a journalist who reports on these issues and therefore has a lot of informed opinions. Neither my guest today nor I are healthcare providers, and this conversation is not meant to substitute for medical or therapeutic advice.FAT TALK is out! Order your signed copy from Virginia's favorite independent bookstore, Split Rock Books (they ship anywhere in the US!). Or order it from your independent bookstore, or from Barnes & Noble, Amazon, Target, or Kobo or anywhere else you like to buy books. You can also order the audio book from Libro.fm or Audible.CREDITSThe Burnt Toast Podcast is produced and hosted by Virginia Sole-Smith and Corinne Fay. Follow Virginia on Instagram, Follow Corinne  @SellTradePlus, an Instagram account where you can buy and sell plus size clothing and subscribe to Big Undies.The Burnt Toast logo is by Farideh.Our theme music is by Jeff Bailey and Chris Maxwell.Tommy Harron is our audio engineer.Thanks for listening and for supporting anti-diet, body liberation journalism.  This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit virginiasolesmith.substack.com/subscribe

Today Virginia is chatting with Nicola Salmon. Nicola is a leading voice for fat folks seeking fertility support, and author of the book Fat and Fertile.As a fertility coach and fat activist, Nicola works to challenge the fertility industry's entrenched weight bias and empower marginalized folks to take control of their reproductive health. (You may know her from Instagram.) If you want more on this whole conversation, check out episode 29 of this podcast, where I talked through all of my reporting and the research on weight and fertility, as it stood at that point. And then go listen to episode two of Cult of Perfect, where we explored the fat mother narrative—and the kind of healthcare that fat moms, and fat pregnant people, get.To tell us YOUR thoughts, and to get all of the links and resources mentioned in this episode, as well as a complete transcript, visit our show page. If you want more conversations like this one, please rate and review us in your podcast player! And become a paid Burnt Toast subscriber — subscriptions are just $7 per month! —to get all of Virginia's reporting and bonus subscriber-only episodes. And don't forget to check out our Burnt Toast Podcast Bonus Content! Disclaimer: You're listening to this episode because you value my input as a journalist who reports on these issues and therefore has a lot of informed opinions. Neither my guest today nor I are healthcare providers, and this conversation is not meant to substitute for medical or therapeutic advice. AND: If you are in the thick of your own fertility journey, and today's episode doesn't feel good for you to hear, please take good care.FAT TALK is out! Order your signed copy from Virginia's favorite independent bookstore, Split Rock Books (they ship anywhere in the US!). Or order it from your independent bookstore, or from Barnes & Noble, Amazon, Target, or Kobo or anywhere else you like to buy books. You can also order the audio book from Libro.fm or Audible.CREDITSThe Burnt Toast Podcast is produced and hosted by Virginia Sole-Smith and Corinne Fay. Follow Virginia on Instagram, Follow Corinne  @SellTradePlus, an Instagram account where you can buy and sell plus size clothing and subscribe to Big Undies.The Burnt Toast logo is by Farideh.Our theme music is by Jeff Bailey and Chris Maxwell.Tommy Harron is our audio engineer.Thanks for listening and for supporting anti-diet, body liberation journalism.  This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit virginiasolesmith.substack.com/subscribe

This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit virginiasolesmith.substack.com/subscribeWelcome to Indulgence Gospel After Dark! It's time for your September Extra Butter! Today we are discussing... dating as a fat person! We'll get into navigating the apps, Corinne's rules for first dates, and why do so many cishet men post fishing pictures. If you are already an Extra Butter subscriber, you'll have this entire episode in your podcast feed and access to the entire transcript in your inbox and on the Burnt Toast Substack. To get all of the links and resources mentioned in this episode, as well as a complete transcript, visit our show page. Otherwise, to hear the whole conversation or read the whole transcript, you'll need to join Extra Butter. It's just $99 per year, and is the hands down best way to keep Burnt Toast an ad- and sponsor-free space. PS. Don't forget to order Fat Talk: Parenting In the Age of Diet Culture! Get your signed copy now from Split Rock Books (they ship anywhere in the USA). You can also order it from your independent bookstore, or from Barnes & Noble, Amazon, Target, Kobo or anywhere you like to buy books. (Or get the UK edition or the audiobook!) Disclaimer: Virginia and Corinne are humans with a lot of informed opinions. They are not nutritionists, therapists, doctors, or any kind of healthcare providers. The conversation you're about to hear and all of the advice and opinions they give are just for entertainment, information, and education purposes only. None of this is a substitute for individual medical or mental health advice.CREDITSThe Burnt Toast Podcast is produced and hosted by Virginia Sole-Smith (follow me on Instagram) and Corinne Fay, who runs @SellTradePlus and Big Undies—subscribe for 20% off.The Burnt Toast logo is by Deanna Lowe.Our theme music is by Farideh.Tommy Harron is our audio engineer.Thanks for listening and for supporting anti-diet, body liberation journalism!

Today Virginia is chatting with romance author Nisha Sharma, author of Marriage & Masti. We discuss Nisha's own writing and get into some big questions about the romance genre: What is happening with bodies? How do romance authors think about fatness? And where are all the fat male love interests already? Marriage & Masti is available in the Burnt Toast Bookshop!Don't forget, you can always take 10 percent off that purchase if you also order (or have already ordered!) Fat Talk from Split Rock Books! (Just use the code FATTALK at checkout.)To tell us YOUR thoughts, and to get all of the links and resources mentioned in this episode, as well as a complete transcript, visit our show page. If you want more conversations like this one, please rate and review us in your podcast player! And become a paid Burnt Toast subscriber to get all of Virginia's reporting and bonus subscriber-only episodes. Disclaimer: Virginia is a journalist and human with a lot of informed opinions. Virginia is not a nutritionist, therapist, doctor, or any kind of health care provider. The conversation you're about to hear and all of the advice and opinions she and her guests give are just for entertainment, information, and education purposes only. None of this is a substitute for individual medical or mental health advice.FAT TALK is out! Order your signed copy from Virginia's favorite independent bookstore, Split Rock Books (they ship anywhere in the US!). Or order it from your independent bookstore, or from Barnes & Noble, Amazon, Target, or Kobo or anywhere else you like to buy books. You can also order the audio book from Libro.fm or Audible.CREDITSThe Burnt Toast Podcast is produced and hosted by Virginia Sole-Smith and Corinne Fay. Follow Virginia on Instagram, Follow Corinne  @SellTradePlus, an Instagram account where you can buy and sell plus size clothing and subscribe to Big Undies.The Burnt Toast logo is by Deanna Lowe.Our theme music is by Jeff Bailey and Chris Maxwell.Tommy Harron is our audio engineer.Thanks for listening and for supporting anti-diet, body liberation journalism.  This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit virginiasolesmith.substack.com/subscribe

You're listening to Burnt Toast!We are Virginia Sole-Smith and Corinne Fay, and it's time for another Indulgence Gospel. It's the last week of our summer break, so we'll be back after Labor Day with all new podcast episodes for you. We so appreciate everyone who has been continuing to listen and support the podcast during our hiatus. It means a lot to know that our community enjoys our work and cares that we're able to make it sustainable too. So as a thank you for listening, today's Indulgence Gospel rerun has no paywall. We've realized that so many of you on the free list almost never get to hear how hilarious and smart Corinne is — and as paid subscribers know, Indulgence Gospel episodes are truly the heart of the podcast. They are the most fun to make, because they are the episodes where we feel truly in conversation with all of you.If you love this episode, of course we hope you'll consider a paid subscription to Burnt Toast so you can get every paywalled episode we make. And we also hope you'll subscribe to Big Undies, Corinne's new Substack about clothes. And, if you subscribe to Big Undies, you can take 20 percent off your Burnt Toast subscription or vice versa – either way, it gets you all of our content for under $12 per month.This episode contains affiliate links. Shopping our links is a great way to support Burnt Toast! Episode 157 TranscriptVirginiaYou're listening to Burnt Toast! This is the podcast about diet culture, fatphobia, parenting, and health. I'm Virginia Sole-Smith I also write the Burnt Toast newsletter.CorinneAnd I'm Corinne Fay. I work on Burnt Toast and run SellTradePlus, an Instagram account where you can buy and sell plus sized clothing.VirginiaWe have so many good questions this month. A lot of parenting food questions. I think maybe because I just ran the lunchbox piece in the newsletter it's on everybody's minds. But also, as usual, some fat fashion stuff. Clogs are coming up later. And Ozempic, because obviously. So it's gonna be a good one.VirginiaSo before we dive in, how are you doing? What's new with you, Corinne?CorinneI'm doing well. One thing that's new with me is: I just signed up to do a powerlifting meet. So I'm feeling nervous. VirginiaWell, yeah. Is this like a competition thing, where people come and watch? CorinneI think so. I mean, obviously, I've never done something like this before. It's in Albuquerque, and it's being run by my gym. And it's all women's. VirginiaThat sounds very cool. CorinneI'm just having a little of like, Oh, what did I do? Let's see. Wow. Am I going to be the most amateur, weakest person there? I might.VirginiaBut you'll still be super strong and amazing. Because the weakest person at a powerlifting competition is still the strongest person in most other rooms.CorinneThat's a good point. And I think one great thing about lifting is, it's really more about your own goals and competing with yourself. But still.VirginiaSo is it like whoever lifts the most is the winner?CorinneSo my understanding is very loose, but I know there are different weight classes. So you compete against people who are roughly around the same size?.Virginia Interesting. Okay.CorinneAnd then I think it's a cumulative weight of how much you lift, like combined squat, deadlift, bench press. VirginiaWow, that's so cool. Julia Turshen recently did one of these.CorinneI feel like I was slightly influenced by Julia Turshen.VirginiaDid she enable you? Julia, good job! The pictures and videos she posted of it looked super exciting. And it looked like a very professional athletic setting. I would be intimidated for sure.CorinneThe other thing that I'm sure we'll end up talking about again, but you have to wear a singlet which is like, where am I gonna find a singlet? And knee socks.VirginiaKnee socks! Why knee socks? CorinneI'm like, oh my God, I'm never gonna find knee socks that fit me, but I'm trying to figure out if I can wear Universal Standard body shorts as a singlet, because I already have one of those. VirginiaThat feels like a great solution. CorinneIt's singlet-esque? But I don't know what the actual requirements are.VirginiaGirlfriend Collective also has a shorts body suit thing.CorinneI should look into that. VirginiaBut I feel like you should be able to work with what you have. Especially for your first one. Once you're a pro and doing this all the time, you'll get, like, something with rhinestones. CorinneOnce I'm a sponsored Olympic athlete. Yes.VirginiaI love that like we're getting to follow along on the journey. Obviously we're going to need another installment on this afterwards.CorinneOkay, yes. And just to be clear, the meet isn't until July, so, so I have a lot of time to think about it.VirginiaI'm just saying though. A few months ago, you were recommending Casey Johnston and her couch-to-barbell program. And you were like, “I'm just using a broomstick.”CorinneIt's true. VirginiaAnd now!CorinneIt's true and now I'm lifting actual pounds.VirginiaVery, very cool. CorinneYeah, what's new with you? VirginiaI feel like what's new with me is that I am surviving, not thriving a little bit. So this is going to come out in mid-April. So we'll be two weeks out from book launch. So I will either be better or I will be way worse. I mean, having had two children, it's sort of similar to the last month of pregnancy when you're like, it's all you can think about, this thing is happening, but you have no control over it. I mean, at least with the book, you know, like the date it's coming. Which with pregnancy, they have yet to really figure out, unless you're scheduling. But I counted it up this morning, I have recorded 18 podcasts so far. Of other people's podcasts. Like for talking about the book. 18 people's podcasts. CorinneOh whoa. That's wild.VirginiaAnd like, seven of them were in the last week and a half? So I feel like my voice is hanging on by a thread. And I'm just getting a little mush-brained about it. I need to step back a little.Obviously, I am super grateful. I love that people want me to talk about the book. I love that people are excited about the book. I cannot wait for it to be out. But it's just at a point where there are a lot of details. Like, review all the press release materials, review the marketing plan…. I forgot we were recording today. And it's not the first thing I've forgotten. Like, I forgot the kids had a dentist appointment. We made it, but I'm just like, my brain is holding too many pieces of information. Some things are getting dropped. I'm just coming in with a sort of scattered energy. But I've got the Throat Coat Tea that I'm living on right now. And we're gonna do it! CorinneDo you have any upcoming book promo stuff that you're really excited to do?VirginiaWell, I did an interview yesterday that I can't talk about yet, because I don't think it will be out by the time this launches. CorinneTop secret. VirginiaThere are two top secret ones that will be coming out in the week or two after this podcast episode. And they're both very exciting. And I will say that I was very happy with my outfit for one. So that was good. And the other one the outfit matters less because it is not visual. I will say no more! And yeah, that part's been fun, actually figuring out clothes for like the book tour Dacy has been helping me and maybe some time we'll do a follow up about finding clothes for this. Because it's a very specific level of, how dressy do you want to be versus comfortable? So maybe there will be an essay of what I wore for the book tour.CorinneI would love to read that.VirginiaOkay, so we're going to do some questions! The first one is a hot take opportunity. This came in over Instagram multiple times. People would like to know what we saw of Jia Tolentino's Ozempic piece in The New Yorker.CorinneOkay, well, now is my time to be embarrassed when I admit that I read it really lightly. I did a really light skim sort of read, and was like, seems fine. And then I've seen everyone else being like, “This article is horrible.” And I've been like, wow, I really need to revisit that and find out why people are so upset.VirginiaI'm glad to hear people are saying they're upset! I felt like no one was talking about it at all for a little bit. And I was like, what is happening? I feel like the New York magazine piece came out, which I wrote about and that was not great. And then this piece comes out two weeks later, and I'm just like, why? Why did it come out? It's the same piece really. And I want to be clear that I love Jia's work. I loved Trick Mirror. I think she writes phenomenal stuff. The piece she did on Angela Garbes last year was just incredible. And this was… not that. It is very much centering the story on thin people who would like to be thinner if they take Ozempic. There's one fat person interviewed for the story. And, you know, of course, every fat person is entitled to their own experience of fatness. But her quotes just reinforced so many stereotypes. She talks about wanting to lose weight because she feels like she can't hike or run at her current size. And it's like, come on. We can do better. CorinneIf you want to hike and run, you could work on hiking and running?VirginiaRight! There are so many fat hikers and runners on Instagram. CorinneI thought the compounding pharmacy thing was kind of interesting.VirginiaOh, like explaining how sort of like loosey goosey it is and getting the drugs? CorinneBecause I've seen a lot of people on TikTok being like, I'm getting this patented drug from a compounding pharmacy. And I'm like, wait, is that real? Like, what is that? So I thought that part was interesting.VirginiaIt was interesting. But when she goes through the process of getting it herself, I always just worry—this is the eating disorder handbook stuff.Corinne True true. You're literally telling people how to do it. VirginiaAnd I get that that's not hard to find. We all have Google. But is that something The New Yorker should be doing? Does The New Yorker need to teach us how to get our weight loss drugs? I don't know. I feel like the general trend in the Ozempic coverage–And this is not just Jia, not just New York Magazine. But by and large, this coverage has this underlying question of: If we have now found a silver bullet that will make people thin, does that mean we can just forget about anti fat bias? And that is so dark. We cannot just say, now that we have a way to make everybody thin, it's okay to hate fat people, because we can just make them thin.CorinneThat's a good point.VirginiaI'm not judging anyone's individual decisions about this. But this larger discourse is not helpful. That's my hot, grouchy take. CorinneThat's the hot take! I would love to know also, if any listeners have strong feelings about it? VirginiaYes. Comments are open!CorinneOkay, the next question is:Q: The one thing I can't shake as a new mom is worrying about making my daughter fat. How do I shake that? I grew up fat and it was hard. I want better for her. But does that mean dieting?VirginiaThis is a very understandable fear. But no, it does not mean dieting. CorinneI want to validate this parent's worries, because you're coming from a place where it sounds like you struggled a lot. And you don't want your kids to struggle, and that totally makes sense.VirginiaI think what I'm stuck on is, “I grew up fat and it was hard.” Yes, absolutely. Not denying that. But was it hard because you were fat? Or was it hard because the world made fat not okay?And so, this is kind of the Ozempic thing, right? Is the answer to erase fatness by which we mean erase fat people? Or is the answer systemic change and unlearning this bias on a personal level? But I know, that is a terrible question. You cannot make all those systemic changes by yourself. That is not doable. So it is really, really hard.CorinneThe one thing that's sort of not explicit in this question is whether the kid is actually fat.VirginiaShe says she's a new mom. So I'm thinking she has a baby. So she probably doesn't know? CorinneBecause my next thought was, you could talk to your kid about it being hard. But maybe not for a newborn.VirginiaBut maybe start now! Get the conversation going.CorinneStart thinking about it. You can talk to yourself about it. I think now might be a time to start therapy. VirginiaTherapy, always a great option.You are not going to make your daughter thin or fat. You don't actually control her body size. The number of factors that go into determining body sizes is this sort of endless and murky list, and no one really knows what are the largest drivers. But how you feed her, and how much you make her run around are not the largest drivers of her body size. And putting all your energy there is only going to cause damage, which you yourself probably know, because when you say it was hard, I'm guessing that some kind of childhood dieting might have been a piece of that.So I feel like we need to let you off the hook of the “I'm gonna make her fat.” She may be fat. There is nothing wrong with that. It is not your fault. And what she really needs is for you to unconditionally accept her body.CorinneI also think this could be a really good time to think of some advocacy you could do, whether that's looking into school policies about bullying or even at the legislative level, like laws about anti fat bias. Or just trying to be an advocate in your community for body liberation or fat liberation? VirginiaI love that. And I just wanna say this is hard. It is really unfair that that is asked of us. But that is where we are on this issue. And we're only going to make progress if we all approach it from that perspective. CorinneAnd I want to reiterate: The thing about bias is, the solution is never to get rid of the people we're biased against. Or to change them somehow.VirginiaRight. So it's okay. Maybe your daughter is going to be fat and how are you going to support her and advocate for her and make your home a safe space for her body?CorinneAll right, I'm going to read the next one too: Q: I am trying very hard to be very neutral about food with my son who's four years old. From the start, I have not labeled foods as good or bad. I have not restricted access to sweets or desserts. But lately, I've started questioning this. I've always felt pressure because I am not able to manage cooking meals. So from the start, my son was fed using a grazing technique where I would put together various foods and he would eat what he wanted. As he has gotten older, he is more specific in his tastes in a way that feels normal to me, pretty much macaroni and cheese or similar foods most of the time. There are other things he will eat, but I feel a lot of grief about my inability to get it together and provide regular hot balanced meals, also for myself. Recently, I've been trying to limit his intake of sweets just a little bit and it feels like a backside but I've been confused. Only two cookies and even suggesting he eats something before he gets the cookies. This week's mailbag episode made me reorient when you talked about not doing this and reminded me why I wanted to avoid this restriction based language. And I admit the reason I started thinking about this was twofold. I filled out a research survey that made me admit a lot of things about our household eating that I feel low level guilty about and I felt the sting of perceived societal shaming.And my son started talking about treats. I was a bit miffed as categorizing something as a treat, as opposed to food which he labeled the rest as, was something I was trying to avoid. Then I realized this could have come from daycare television, the fact that we give the dog treats, and so I am overreacting. I find it's so hard to be consistent in my parenting in many avenues and food encroaches on that too. Giving food as a reward for example, this is something I do for myself, and I like it. But perhaps it is part of the problem of saving food for a special occasion as opposed to having it because you want it.I need some perspective, please. Is it ever useful to direct a child to a more balanced diet as opposed to just modeling it? I do not mean telling them that specific foods help your eyes. What a relief to see that debunked, but more that many foods are yummy. And basically some form of kid specific ‘everything in moderation.'VirginiaThe first thing I want to say is: You are doing a great job. You are feeding your child. It does not matter that you are not cooking. And that the food is not hot or homemade. It does not matter at all. You are meeting your son's needs by making sure he is fed every day, and making sure that he has enough to eat in order to grow. That's the most important thing and you're doing it. You're winning! You're doing great. And this really drives home for me the stigma we have around the idea that you can't feed kids processed foods, you have to cook meals. All of this is so unhelpful because there are just so many reasons why that model of family meals is not a good fit. There could be disability issues. There could be cost issues, time bandwidth issues, all sorts of hurdles. There could also just be that you don't like cooking. You can still be a good parent and not like cooking. It's not a requirement. SoI just want to encourage you to take some of the shame away. Corinne That's a great place to start. I totally agree. I was thinking about the study that you mention in FAT TALK about how it doesn't matter what you're eating and it much more matters that kids are just eating. VirginiaOh, that's a quote from Katherine Zavodni, who's one of my favorite pediatric dietitians. So teaser for everyone who hasn't read the book yet, but it's a quote that I want to put on our fridge! She says, “The most important thing about good nutrition is making sure kids have enough to eat.” Because if you have enough to eat, all the minutiae of micronutrients, and macronutrients tends to work itself out. Now, obviously, there are kids with severe food issues like feeding disorders, allergies or other medical conditions where it may be more complicated. Their nutritional needs may be more specific. But if your kid is not dealing with one of those things, and has enough to eat on any given day, you have done your job as a parent.CorinneAnd you also talked about the studies on family meals, right? And how the benefits come from eating together rather than making sure it's a home-cooked meal. VirginiaI'm so glad you brought that up. All the research on family dinners, which talks about how important they are for kids' overall well-being and health—it's because families are spending time together. So you could do that around breakfast, you could do that around a snack, you could do that in ways that have nothing to do with food. Like maybe you regularly have a long car ride to commute to school and work together. And that's when you talk and catch up on your day. Kids need connected time with their caregivers. Food is just one helpful way to do it.CorinneIt doesn't matter if you are eating snack plates, or macaroni. VirginiaSome of my most connected meals with my kids are when we're eating takeout or bowls of Cheerios for dinner! Because everyone is relaxed and you can focus on each other. And you're not in this place of, “I put all this work into this meal and nobody likes it.”. So then let's talk about feeling like you need to limit his intake of sweets. I think you're going there because you're feeling ashamed about what you're doing. So I'm hoping just lifting some of the shame lets you step back from that a little bit. I also think the research shows pretty clearly that requiring kids to eat in very specific ways, like micromanaging their plate by saying “you have to eat something else before you get the cookies” or “only two cookies,” does not. in the long-term, serve kids' relationship with food. It tends to result in kids who are overly fixated on the foods that have a lot of rules around them. You're going to find yourself in power struggles where it's like, why only two cookies, why not three cookies, why not two and a half cookies.Don't feel bad that you've done this, because I think we all get into these sort of panic moments where we do this because we're just struggling and it feels like the “right thing to do.” But I don't think it will ultimately serve you or serve your child. I think modeling eating a variety of foods is the best thing we can do. And even using phrases like “balance” or “everything in moderation,” I don't love because not every day is going to be about moderation. And that can turn into a rule. Because what is “moderation?” And then the last thing I'll say is, I think we touched on this in a previous episode. But I don't think treat needs to be a bad word. Yes, we give the dog treats. Dogs' existences are largely treat-based, at least in my house. We give ourselves food as rewards when we're stressed out or we need some extra comfort. When we talk about keeping all foods neutral, I think we can take it too far, to this place where it feels like we're not supposed to have any feelings about food at all. And that is not realistic or fair, or in line with how humans interact with foods.So we do use the word treat in our house. And this came up with the lunchbox piece because I have a category of treats on the little chart I made for Beatrix and folks were like, “I can't believe you have a treat category.” And I realized they had a different definition of that word. If you don't have restrictive rules around when or how much treats you can eat, then treat is a neutral word. It just means foods that feel extra fun. Just something extra fun you want to have on your plate along with your other foods. And if you're not saying “we only eat treats once a day,” or “we only eat treats on Saturdays;” if it's not paired with restrictive language, then it's still keeping foods neutral. Does that make sense?CorinneI think especially with the lunch box example, you're using treat as a category to make sure you're getting a treat. That seems really positive.VirginiaBecause I want them to know that those foods are welcome in their lunchboxes. Yes.CorinneOr required, even! VirginiaNone of it's required, Corinne, they can skip the treat if they want! But it's a part of the meal. CorinneMaybe that's a way that this person could reframe it. It feels like you're hearing your kid say treat and thinking they're feeling like it's something to be restricted. When could you be like, “Let's make sure you're getting enough treats.”VirginiaThat's a great re-framing. I hope this helps. This is a big question. And I can tell you're working through a lot of big stuff. So we would like an update. Please keep us posted!CorinneYou're doing a great job.VirginiaYes. CorinneI'm gonna read the next one as well. Q: My daughter is in fifth grade. At school she's often given food in addition to what she brings for her lunch and snacks. Candy is handed out as an incentive. Snacks, as well as non-edible items, are available to purchase with Classroom Bucks earned for good behavior. Several days a week she has after school activities that include a good deal of snacking. For the most part, I've accepted that I have no control over what she eats when she's away from me. However, she is regularly coming home not hungry for the dinner I've prepared. It's becoming more frequent lately that she'll snack so much at school, and at after school activities, that she will eat only a couple bites of dinner, and occasionally nothing at all. Dinners are usually meals she likes and she always has the opportunity to choose a backup option if she doesn't. So I don't think it's an issue of filling up because she won't get food she likes at dinner. She chooses and packs her own lunch and snack. We generally have a rule that if you put it on the grocery list, Mom will buy it, which is to say she has a lot of control of choice and regular access to candy and snack foods, both at home and in her lunch.Is it diet culture to expect her to come to dinner ready to eat? Or is it valid for me to feel miffed that she's already full? And yeah, I realize we'll all have an off day or skip a meal once in a while. This is becoming a regular occurrence though.VirginiaI don't think it's diet culture exactly. I think it's performative parenting culture a little bit, where we are very tied to this idea that, again, the family dinner is this all-important cornerstone of the day, where we have to provide a certain kind of meal. And that it is only successful if our children eat the meal. If they participate in, and enjoy the meal. And even if we're like, “they can choose how much they're hungry for,” if they don't want to eat it at all, it's really hard.I say this from extensive personal experience. It's really hard to not feel like you failed because you're like, “I just spent 40 minutes making this and you ate two bites and ran away.” But what I also want to say is: 9 out of 10 family dinners in my house involve one or both children eating two bites of the meal and running away. I think it's very, very, very common at sort of all ages. And yes, it is often because they had a lot of snacks in the afternoon. Because that is when they were really hungry and needed to eat. And so my expectation that 5:30 or 6:00 pm is when we're all going to sit down and eat this big meal together is out of line with the reality of at 3:30 or 4:30 pm, they are ravenous and need to eat. And so we're just always going to have that mismatch and it is what it is. Nobody needs to feel bad.CorinneThis relates back a little to the parent who's feeling guilty about not cooking meals. It's kind of the flip side where this parent is cooking meals and feeling bad about them.VirginiaI also want to speak to the piece about food given out at school. I don't love candy being handed out as an incentive in class. And that is not because I don't want the kids eating the candy. It's because I think it does play into making candy seem so special and coveted. And for kids who have more restrictive relationships with candy at home, I don't feel like it's helpful. Does that make sense? I don't have a problem with there being a birthday party in class and everyone's eating cupcakes or candy just being there, like if the teacher just wants to have a candy jar on their desk and kids can help themselves. But it's layering on the messages about earning the candy that I really don't love. Because diet culture is going to teach kids so many different ways that you have to earn your treats.But I have not figured out a way to eradicate this practice from the American public school system. It's a very common tactic. And I think teachers have very, very hard jobs and if handing out M&Ms for getting math problems right makes it easier to do their job? I don't know, man, I think that's where we are. CorinneYeah. VirginiaAnd if it's happening in the context of, your child also has all this great regular access to candy and treats because like you said, you're involving her in the grocery list and lunch packing and all that, then I don't think it being handed out as an incentive is going to do that much damage.They can understand that at school, M&Ms are being given as a reward. And at home, there is a bag of M&Ms that I can just eat.CorinneWith the teachers handing out candy as incentives, I'm worried more about the kids who are not getting candy as incentives.VirginiaOh, what a terrible message. That's so sad. You did this wrong. No candy for you. It is tricky. And I mean, I don't mind kids purchasing snacks with Classroom Bucks. That feels a little more diffuse to me. That's giving them some independence. And after school activities should include snacks because the majority of children are starving after school. I think the key here is don't demonize the way she's eating because she's getting her needs met. Just maybe take some pressure off yourself. If dinner is usually something she likes, if there's an option to choose a backup option and she doesn't, then she's just not hungry. CorinneAnd maybe that can take some of the pressure off dinner. Like maybe you just make a snack plate.VirginiaSomething simpler. Or make something you're really excited to eat.CorinneSomething you like! VirginiaThat's what I often do when I can tell the kids are not in like super dinner oriented phases. I'm like, Okay, then I'm picking what I want. And we also do a bedtime snack. And in fifth grade, she's probably staying up late enough that she's up a few hours after dinner. And if she was really hungry for dinner at 3pm, and then she wasn't that hungry for real dinner at 6pm, by 8 or 9pm, she probably needs something before she goes to bed. Alright, should I read the next one? Q: My question is about restricting food, not for dietary reasons, but because of the financial and waste concerns. My spouse and I wince when we see our kids drowning their waffles in maple syrup and leaving a plateful of it, eating all the prepackaged expensive foods we try to save for their lunches and eating all the Girl Scout cookies so they don't have to share them with a sibling.I've told my kids that they never need to hide food, but I find them doing so in order to get the last of something like the Oreos they want to keep from their brother. I buy Oreos every time we go to the store, and our house has plenty of sweets and other snack foods, but eventually we will run out of things. How do we keep them out of the scarcity mindset while still dealing with the realities of eating with a family? I really feel you on the syrup. It's so expensive. CorinneI know I was thinking you're basically watching your kid pour gold on their pancakes. VirginiaIt's so much. CorinneI mean this whole question is relatable to me. I definitely had some anxiety growing up about like, I feel like my dad would always eat stuff that I wanted, like leftovers or like the last cookie or something, you know?VirginiaYeah, it's really tricky because the bummer answer to this is: A finance-based scarcity mindset can be just as damaging as a diet-culture based scarcity mindset.CorinneSo true. VirginiaKids who grow up without enough to eat, or with this sort of ever-present worry about there being enough to eat often end up with some disordered eating stuff down the road, understandably, because when there is food, they'll feel like, “I have to eat it all. Because I don't know what I'm going to eat it again.” It's totally logical. So this can be really tough. And I'm not sure from this question, if you are struggling to afford these foods? Is there a true food insecurity issue in your house? Or if it's more just, you are on a budget. CorinneYou only go grocery shopping once a week and Oreos don't last the whole week.VirginiaSo I'm not sure which one we're dealing with. But I just want to say if affording food is really hard for you, then obviously, your first priority is getting whatever support you can around that. Which could be finding out if you're eligible for SNAP benefits, making sure your kids are on the school lunch program, all the stuff that I am sure you are already doing. And don't need me to explain to you.If it's more just the “Good God, that was a $9 bottle of syrup” moment, I think it's okay to say to kids, “This is a more expensive food.” So we're going to be mindful of that. With syrup, if you have little ramekins or bowls, you can say, “We're going to give everyone their own syrup.” And pour generously! Don't flood the plate the way they would flood the plate, but pour generously enough so that every kid feels like they have their own and they don't have to share it.We do this sometimes with something like brownies. Or if we have cake or some dessert that we don't have as often. When I know the kids are going to be really excited about it, I often will just go ahead and portion it out. Not because I'm trying to control how much they eat. But because I want them to know, “I'm definitely getting mine.” This actually just happened with Cadbury Mini Eggs, which are just a prime example of a scarcity mindset food because you can only get them for a month a year and they're the best candy. It's so hard! Dan brought home a big family-size bag from the grocery store. And between me and the girls, it was gone by the next night and he was like, “Really? Really? There are none left?” I think he was mad he didn't get any. But I was like, “Yeah, no there are none left.” I know that you thought that was a big bag, but we haven't had these in ages and we're all real jazzed about it.CorinneYou need to start portioning out some for Dan.VirginiaI suppose that would have been nice of me. CorinneSo if you're portioning out the brownie—what does that mean? Like you cut the brownies into four squares and give everyone a square? VirginiaI usually give everyone two squares because I feel one brownie is never enough.CorinneOh, you cut them into normal sized pieces. VirginiaOh yes. I just cut up the brownies. But rather than put the pan of brownies in the middle of the table, which might make everyone worry, like, “Am I going to get the piece I want?” Especially because, in my household, center-of-the-pan brownies are highly coveted. It's a whole thing.  So I'll just go ahead and be like, “Here's your center brownie.” So they don't have to be anxious about whether they'll get one.Maybe also, talk to your kids about which foods they worry about wanting the most. It's useful to know what that is. So you can think about how to ease up that fear, in a way that is in line with your budget. But maybe the kid who's hiding the Oreos, you buy them their own jumbo bag of Oreos and they don't have to share. And maybe if that's in your budget, you do that for a few weeks and see how that goes. And maybe every kid gets their own favorite snack food in that kind of quantity, which they don't have to share with a sibling. And then it's understood that all the other stuff is shared. It's not teaching restriction or scarcity to say, “Okay, let's make sure everyone has their seconds before you have thirds.” That's manners. That's okay. CorinneOr to maybe just one week buy like super extra amounts of Oreos and be like, eat as many Oreos as you want this week. VirginiaAnd see what they do with that. That would be interesting.CorinneAll right. Here's a question for you: How comfortable are your Charlotte Stone clogs?VirginiaThey are comfortable for clogs, is what I would say. And I love clogs very much. But they are a little bit of a scam in that they are not actually the most comfortable shoe. So I do not equate them to sneakers. For sure sneakers are more comfortable. Birkenstocks are more comfortable. But I wear my Charlotte Stone clogs the way other people might wear a ballet flat, or a loafer, like a dressier shoe. And I feel like no dressy shoe is ever really that comfortable. They're pinchy or they give you blisters. And so by that standard, these are quite comfortable. Because they have a built-in memory foam padding situation. So you're not walking on a block of wood the way you are with some clogs. I feel like I got shin splints from those, back in the day. They're definitely more comfortable than that. But I wore them downtown yesterday. And I did move my car to avoid walking two blocks because it was uphill. So I don't wear them for extensive walking. CorinneBut you would say they're more comfortable than some clogs?VirginiaI think yes. Of the various cute clog brands.CorinneFashion clogs.VirginiaThey are the most comfortable fashion clog I have tried and I have tried probably three or four brands. Like they're better than Number Six. They're better than Swedish Hasbeens. CorinneMy issue is that clogs are always too narrow for me. I can never find clogs that fit.VirginiaYeah, and I mean I have narrower feet, so I don't know how useful Charlotte Stone is on that front.CorinneThey do have a lot of sizing info. I tried some Charlotte Stone non-clogs, like they had a cute sneaker-ish thing, because they go up to size 12. Which should be what my size is, but they were way too narrow. Like I could not even get my foot in.VirginiaThat's such a bummer. Somebody could get into the wide width clog market and do very well.CorinneOh God, seriously. I found one clog that works for wide-ish feet. It's called Haga Trotoffel or something.VirginiaThat sounded like a very accurate pronunciation. CorinneI've had a pair, but it's the non-padded pure wood kind. So it's just not super comfortable to me.VirginiaThose are rough. Ever since I sprained my ankle, I am very cautious. Where am I going to wear these clogs? What sort of terrain am I walking? I really want to find some cute ones with a strap at the back for more stability. I think Charlotte Stone has ones with a strap that I'm thinking about trying, except I don't need more clogs. CorinneNumber Six also has some that are really cute and the base is almost flat. That might be more uncomfortable. I don't know.VirginiaWell I wear the lowest height Charlotte Stone clog. I do not go for their super platforms. I am not 22. That chapter of my life is closed. But they're not a Dansko clog! Let's be clear. And, I would say to be realistic that if you live on the east coast, or the Midwest, they're like, a three month a year shoe. They're great in the spring. They're great in the fall. They're going to be too hot in the summer and they're going to be useless in the winter. So factor that in. Okay, so next up: Q: I have a question about chafing. Since giving birth for the second time in 2021, my body has changed and I probably fall in the small fat category. I've dealt with chafing between my thighs and in the summers before, but now that I have to wear outside clothes and get out of the house more, I am dealing with chafing in the groin area even in the winter, which is the thing I didn't I don't have prior experience with. I am looking for recommendations for underwear that have a wide enough gusset to hopefully prevent this. And any other tips to be more comfortable in this regard with this new body of mine? Corinne, you're the underwear queen!CorinneI have a lot of thoughts about this.VirginiaYou are the resident Burnt Toast underwear expert.CorinneMy first thought is: Are we sure this is a chafing issue? VirginiaOh, what else could it be? CorinneWell, another thing that can happen when you become fat is you get irritation in your skin folds area. So just something to throw out there, because I've heard people having confusion around that before. It's like a yeast infection you can get in your skin folds. It's like a diaper rash. And you can treat it with diaper rash cream or zinc cream.VirginiaAquaphor?CorinneNo! Aquaphor? Isn't Aquaphor like Vaseline?VirginiaYeah, but I used it on my kids' butts when they had diaper rash. CorinneOkay, well, maybe I don't know anything about diaper rash.VirginiaMaybe that was a bad move.CorinneI feel like a lot of diaper rash cream has zinc in it, and it coats your skin to protect it. VirginiaI know what you're talking about now.CorinneIn terms of wider gusset underwear, there are not a lot of good options. The one option that I have found out about which I have not tried but have ordered and am currently waiting on is this underwear from the brand Panty Drop. I'm kind of confused about what's going on with them because it seems like they merged with another brand which was Kade & Vos. Okay. But they claimed to have wider gusset underwear. And another thing you could consider would be boxers or boxer briefs.VirginiaI was wondering about even a boy's short underwear. Something that has a longer thigh situation.CorinneIt goes down further.VirginiaOr bike shorts as underwear. CorinneAnd I mean, people definitely make chafing shorts. VirginiaYes! I just ordered some from Snag.CorinnePeople also like Thigh Society. So you could shop around and look for chafing shorts that you could just wear as underwear. VirginiaRight, just under your jeans or other hard pants, And where are you on MegaBabe or the other chafing balms? Do you have one you like?CorinneI have MegaBabe. I almost never need it. Just, whatever way that I'm designed, it's not an issue for me right now. Virginia I get chafing but I haven't tried MegaBabe. I actually have a very low tech hack. But I use Old Spice antiperspirant, which is my husband's antiperspirant, and I use that as my antiperspirant. And so then I just put it between my thighs as well. And I find that holds up pretty well. I sometimes have to reapply it during the day, like on a very hot day. And one of the reasons I think I don't wear dresses as much anymore is, chafing is an automatic reality in dresses. And some shorts too, depending on how they're cut. So we feel you. This is a reality of fat life for sure! CorinneIf you have fat friends, you can talk to them about it because a lot of people have this problem.VIrginiaIt's an evergreen conversation. Everyone will have opinions.CorinneOkay, next question: Q: Any tips on changing the dialogue with mom friends or friends in general who are progressive and informed otherwise, but still mired in diet culture? I feel like I'm the only one who isn't intermittent fasting or doing keto.VirginiaI posted a meme on Instagram today, there was something like to all the women who are bullying each other to order salads, aren't you so sad that you hate your life so much. And my DMs are currently flooded with people asking some version of this question: How do I keep going out to dinner with my friends who are so in this space? One person was telling me about being out to dinner and this group of women were trying to split tacos. Like tacos are small to start with. And they were all like, “Well, I can't eat a whole one.”CorinneI'm like, “Am I ordering 9 or 12.”VirginiaCorrect. The number of tacos I need to be full is a very high number. I would not split one in two. It's already only two bites!CorinneIt's like trying to split a popsicle.VirginiaIt's a total mess. So I feel like my first piece of advice is, can you make new friends? I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I know. CorinneMy first piece of advice is just like, Man up. Tell them you don't want to talk about it.VirginiaThat's better than mine.CorinneI mean, maybe it's harsh. It's a little tough love. Your advice is good too. There's gotta be other people out there who are sick of this. Like, every person I know could benefit from some examination of their relationship with diet culture. So I just feel like, you can't be the only one who's struggling.VirginiaThere are almost 30,000 people subscribed to this newsletter, who probably feel the same way as you because why else are they reading the newsletter and listening to this podcast?.CorinneOkay. Actually, this is a little off topic. But can I tell you something? So, as previously discussed, I go to the gym. I have a trainer there. And this week, when I saw her, she was like, “Hey, so this person contacted me who found me through Burnt Toast.” VirginiaYay! CorinneSo I'm just saying what that basically means is there is another person in the city that I live in, who's reading Burnt tToast who I don't know. And none of my friends know. VirginiaRight! But who maybe would be an awesome friend. CorinneOr who at least also has some skepticism of diet culture stuff.  So that's got to be true for you as well.VirginiaAnd you have powerlifting in common! Yes, in my close group of friends, we really never talk about this. And maybe it's because they read the newsletter and know that I'm not the friend for this. CorinneThey're scared. VirginiaBut we have so many better conversations because this is off the table for us. And we never made a conscious decision to do it. It just kind of happened. I do feel like in the past, we had more diet-y conversations. And we've all kind of shifted away from it. And it's been lovely and great for our friendships. And so maybe you do need to officially say it to these people: I love you. But I just don't want to talk about diets. This really isn't good for me. I just end up feeling shitty about myself. And there are so many more interesting things to talk about here.CorinneYeah. I think it's good for people to know that too. If people are totally unaware that talking about their diets constantly is hurting people, then they should know. And they deserve to know that.VirginiaCompletely agree. And often this talk is very performative because we think we have to talk this way. And so you being the first one to say, “What if we just ordered what we wanted to eat and didn't do this whole dance?” I call it like playing the game of Salad Chicken, where you're like,“Could I order the pasta? No, not if she's ordering the salad.” Like, if you could not do that? Man, dinner is gonna be way more fun. So just give people permission to not do it and see what happens. And if they really can't get there, then I circle back to: Can you have other friends? Or can you say to them, I don't want to spend our time talking about this but I'm really sorry you're struggling and how can I support you?CorinneOh my God, I love the idea of responding to someone who's excited about intermittent fasting with, “I'm sorry, you're struggling.”VirginiaHow can I support you in this starvation?CorinneI'm so sorry that you're not eating food.VirginiaYou're right. That might not be the moment.CorinneNo, I like it. VirginiaI think it could work? I think it's an option. CorinneI mean, I think this is also that sort of situation where you can be like, “It's so interesting that we're all so focused on our weird diets.”VirginiaThe patented Corinne “It's so interesting!”CorinneJust an anthropological, outsider observation.VirginiaIt's always, always a good moment for that. All right. Should we do Butter? CorinneYes. I do have a Butter. What I want to recommend is this recipe called Trouble Cookies. It's from a cookbook called Mother Grains, but it's also on the Bon Appetit website. And I feel like it's a little annoying to recommend because it does have a really annoying to find ingredient which is sorghum flour. [Reminder that if you preorder FAT TALK from Split Rock Books, you can also take 10 percent off any book mentioned on the podcast!]VirginiaOh Lord.CorinneBut you can order it from the internet!VirginiaCorinne will find a link for you.CorinneBob's Red Mill's has it. So if you have that kind of grocery store. Anyways, they also have coconut cashews and toffee bits and are extremely delicious. I've been trying to get my mom to make them for like a month and now I'm moving on to the Burnt Toast community. Please make Trouble Cookies and tell me how good they are.VirginiaI will try them. I will report back if I can get it together to get sorghum flour. I could use a new cookie. We're just a standard chocolate chip cookie household. CorinneI feel like chocolate chip cookies are good. But sometimes, a different direction is really good, too. VirginiaIs there chocolate in it? CorinneNo, it's coconut toffee bits cashews.VirginiaCould I put chocolate chips in instead of the toffee bits.CorinneI mean, I feel like you could? But it's really good. Do you not like caramel-y, coconut-y stuff?VirginiaAmy will tell you it is very hard for me to have a dessert that doesn't have chocolate in it.CorinneOkay, this one is not for you. VirginiaI'm just always like, but where's the chocolate? CorinneOh my God.VirginiaWhat am I doing here?Corinne I'm the opposite. And I mean, I really like chocolate. But I also really like a coconut-y caramel-y vibe. VirginiaI do too. I'm just like, but how much better if there was chocolate. That's all I'm saying.CorinneI feel like maybe you could dip it in chocolate? VirginiaAll right. I don't know. I'll try them out. I'll report back. Maybe I'll do half the batch with the toffee, half the batch with the chocolate chips. I can tell you my kids won't touch them if there's no chocolate. So that's like a non-starter. CorinneReally? Wow.VirginiaOh, please. CorinneI feel like a lot of kids don't like chocolate. VirginiaThat is not the case in the Sole-Smith home. See previous anecdote regarding Mini Eggs consumed in a day. And center brownies. It's very clear what we've come here to do.CorinneAll right, what's your Butter?VirginiaAll right, my Butter is, I am breaking up with underwire bras. Breaking news. CorinneThis is big news. VirginiaYou've all been wondering. I'm not totally breaking up with them because I haven't quite found a non-underwire bra that works under every outfit. Because there can be a uniboob situation? But I have recently purchased some non-underwire bras. And I realize now that I don't know how I made it through the whole pandemic while still wearing underwire bras every day. Every day!CorinneMe neither! I feel like when we originally talked about bras on a mailbag episode, I recommended the bras that you ended up getting.VirginiaThe True & Co bras? CorinneYes! And you were like, “Oh, never heard of them.” VirginiaWell, you influenced me. And then Marielle Elizabeth really influenced me. And I bought a bunch of them and they're awesome.CorinneThey're really good. The sizing is super flexible. I can wear anywhere from a 1x to a 3x. And I have a big chest.VirginiaYou do have to look for the full cup. Because I ordered some that were like a half cup and they do not work if you are someone with a big chest. CorinneYes, they have full cups and regular cups. VirginiaSo you have to look for the full cup. I can only find them on Amazon right now. I don't know. CorinneThey're only on Amazon now. VirginiaIt's really irritating. I would like there to be other options. But the other one I'm wearing a lot of, is I have some of the Paloma bras from Girlfriend Collective. And actually, this one isn't the Paloma, it's the high necked? I don't know. But I like it because it feels just like a tank. Yeah, I don't know why it's taken me so long to get here. I will be 42 a few weeks after you hear this episode. It's taken me a while. But now, I realize that I don't have to accept permanent marks on the side of my body from bras. Like what was I doing? I think I thought I really needed more structure. I'll unpack it all in an essay at some point. But for now, I just want to report the liberation that I am wearing underwire bras much less frequently. And it's delightful. CorinneI love that. VirginiaAll right. Thank you all so much for listening to Burnt Toast!CorinneIf you'd like to support the show, please subscribe for free in your podcast player and leave us a rating or review. These really help folks find the show.The Burnt Toast Podcast is produced and hosted by Virginia Sole-Smith (follow me on Instagram) and Corinne Fay, who runs @SellTradePlus, and Big Undies—subscribe for 20% off! The Burnt Toast logo is by Deanna Lowe.Our theme music is by Jeff Bailey and Chris Maxwell.Tommy Harron is our audio engineer.Thanks for listening and for supporting anti-diet, body liberation journalism! This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit virginiasolesmith.substack.com/subscribe

This is a free preview of a paid episode. To hear more, visit virginiasolesmith.substack.comYou're listening to Burnt Toast!We are Virginia Sole-Smith and Corinne Fay and it's time for your Indulgence Gospel!We'll be getting into:* How to navigate it when you're taking a semaglutide for your health but your kids are noticing your weight loss?* Fat fashion* Some good old fashioned hate mail* And Corinne got a tattoo!This is a paywalled episode. That means to hear the whole thing you'll need to be a paid Burnt Toast subscriber. Subscriptions are $7 per month or $70 for the year.If you're already a paid subscriber, you can add on a subscription to Big Undies, Corinne's newsletter about clothes, for 20% off.The Burnt Toast Podcast is produced and hosted by Virginia Sole-Smith (follow me on Instagram) and Corinne Fay, who runs @SellTradePlus, and Big Undies—subscribe for 20% off! The Burnt Toast logo is by Deanna Lowe.Our theme music is by Jeff Bailey and Chris Maxwell.Tommy Harron is our audio engineer.Thanks for listening and for supporting anti-diet, body liberation journalism!

You're listening to Burnt Toast. I'm Virginia Sole-Smith. Today I am chatting with the brilliant Laura Thomas, PhD.Laura is a Registered Nutritionist who specializes in responsive feeding and anti-diet, body affirming nutrition. Her work centers on helping parents and families end inter-generational dieting and body shame, and work towards a greater sense of embodiment and ease in their relationship with food. She writes the newsletter Can I Have Another Snack? and is the author of two books; Just Eat It and How to Just Eat It.Laura did an awesome three part series on her newsletter last summer, and as soon as I read it, I knew I wanted to have her on the podcast to discuss. We'll be getting into:* What even is an Ultra-Processed Food?* What does the research tell us about how UPFs impact our health?* How should we be thinking about the current UPF discourse?This episode first ran as a two-parter, so if you find today's conversation helpful, you'll also want to go back and listen to episode 102, where we answer your nitty gritty questions about the UPFs in your diet.If you want more conversations like this one, please rate and review us in your podcast player! And become a paid Burnt Toast subscriber to get all of Virginia's reporting and bonus subscriber-only episodes.Disclaimer: Virginia is a journalist and human with a lot of informed opinions. Virginia is not a nutritionist, therapist, doctor, or any kind of health care provider. The conversation you're about to hear and all of the advice and opinions she gives are just for entertainment, information, and education purposes only. None of this is a substitute for individual medical or mental health advice.BUTTER & OTHER LINKSLaura's three part series on UPFsVirginia on processed foods here and therelabor rights violations for Amy's workersFAT TALK is out! Order your signed copy from Virginia's favorite independent bookstore, Split Rock Books (they ship anywhere in the US!). Or order it from your independent bookstore, or from Barnes & Noble, Amazon, Target, or Kobo or anywhere else you like to buy books. You can also order the audio book from Libro.fm or Audible.The Burnt Toast Podcast is produced and hosted by Virginia Sole-Smith (follow me on Instagram) and Corinne Fay who runs @SellTradePlus and Big Undies—subscribe for 20% off.The Burnt Toast logo is by Deanna Lowe.Our theme music is by Jeff Bailey and Chris Maxwell.Tommy Harron is our audio engineer.Thanks for listening and for supporting anti-diet, body liberation journalism! This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit virginiasolesmith.substack.com/subscribe

Today Virginia is chatting with Lyz Lenz, author of the newsletter Men Yell at Me and the brand new book This American Ex-Wife: How I Ended My Marriage and Started My Life.This American Ex-Wife is available in the Burnt Toast Bookshop!Don't forget, you can always take 10 percent off that purchase if you also order (or have already ordered!) Fat Talk from Split Rock Books! (Just use the code FATTALK at checkout.)To get all of the links and resources mentioned in this episode, as well as a complete transcript, visit our show page. If you want more conversations like this one, please rate and review us in your podcast player! And become a paid Burnt Toast subscriber to get all of Virginia's reporting and bonus subscriber-only episodes. And don't forget to check out our new Burnt Toast Podcast Bonus Content! Disclaimer: Virginia is a journalist and human with a lot of informed opinions. Virginia is not a nutritionist, therapist, doctor, or any kind of health care provider. The conversation you're about to hear and all of the advice and opinions she and her guests give are just for entertainment, information, and education purposes only. None of this is a substitute for individual medical or mental health advice.FAT TALK is out! Order your signed copy from Virginia's favorite independent bookstore, Split Rock Books (they ship anywhere in the US!). Or order it from your independent bookstore, or from Barnes & Noble, Amazon, Target, or Kobo or anywhere else you like to buy books. You can also order the audio book from Libro.fm or Audible.CREDITSThe Burnt Toast Podcast is produced and hosted by Virginia Sole-Smith. Follow Virginia on Instagram.Burnt Toast transcripts and essays are edited and formatted by Corinne Fay, who runs @SellTradePlus, an Instagram account where you can buy and sell plus size clothing.The Burnt Toast logo is by Deanna Lowe.Our theme music is by Jeff Bailey and Chris Maxwell.Tommy Harron is our audio engineer.Thanks for listening and for supporting anti-diet, body liberation journalism.  This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit virginiasolesmith.substack.com/subscribe

Writer Virginia Sole-Smith was a skinny teenager who became a fat adult. She now writes about and personally experiences anti-fat bias on a daily basis, from finding clothes to accessing medical care. On this episode, hear Ricki open up about her own weight journey as she and Virginia talk about how weight discrimination shows up across the fat spectrum, how to let your kids make their own decisions about what they put in their bodies, and whether or not Ricki herself has contributed to fatphobia. Get ready for one of the most open and honest conversations about weight you've ever heard. Show Resources: Check out Virginia's books, Fat Talk: Parenting in the Age of Diet Culture and The Eating Instinct: Food Culture, Body Image, and Guilt in America Subscribe to Virginia's Substack newsletter, Burnt Toast Follow Ricki Lake @rickilake on Instagram. And stay up to date with us @LemonadaMedia on X, Facebook, and Instagram. For a list of current sponsors and discount codes for this and every other Lemonada show, go to lemonadamedia.com/sponsors. Joining Lemonada Premium is a great way to support our show and get bonus content. Subscribe today at bit.ly/lemonadapremium.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This is a free preview of a paid episode. To hear more, visit virginiasolesmith.substack.comIt's time for your July Indulgence Gospel! We'll be getting into:Millennial vs Gen Z feelings about socksHow to even begin a closet reorganization projectWhat to do when the roller coaster doesn't fit your body. And so much more!To hear the whole conversation or read the whole transcript, you'll need to become a paid Burnt Toast subscriber. Subscribe here.If you are already a paid subscriber, you'll have this entire episode in your podcast feed and access to the entire transcript in your inbox and on the Burnt Toast Substack. You can also subscribe to Corinne's newsletter, Big Undies, for 20% off using this special link. To get all of the links and resources mentioned in this episode, as well as a complete transcript, visit our show page. Also, don't forget to order Fat Talk: Parenting In the Age of Diet Culture! Get your signed copy now from Split Rock Books (they ship anywhere in the USA). You can also order it from your independent bookstore, or from Barnes & Noble, Amazon, Target, Kobo or anywhere you like to buy books. (Or get the UK edition or the audiobook!) Disclaimer: Virginia and Corinne are humans with a lot of informed opinions. They are not nutritionists, therapists, doctors, or any kind of healthcare providers. The conversation you're about to hear and all of the advice and opinions they give are just for entertainment, information, and education purposes only. None of this is a substitute for individual medical or mental health advice.CREDITSThe Burnt Toast Podcast is produced and hosted by Virginia Sole-Smith (follow me on Instagram) and Corinne Fay, who runs @SellTradePlus, and Big Undies—subscribe for 20% off! The Burnt Toast logo is by Deanna Lowe.Our theme music is by Jeff Bailey and Chris Maxwell.Tommy Harron is our audio engineer.Thanks for listening and for supporting anti-diet, body liberation journalism!

Today Virginia is chatting with Anita Bhagwandas, author of Ugly: Giving Us Back Our Beauty Standards.  Ugly is available in the Burnt Toast Bookshop!Don't forget, you can always take 10 percent off that purchase if you also order (or have already ordered!) Fat Talk from Split Rock Books! (Just use the code FATTALK at checkout.)To tell us YOUR thoughts, and to get all of the links and resources mentioned in this episode, as well as a complete transcript, visit our show page. If you want more conversations like this one, please rate and review us in your podcast player! And become a paid Burnt Toast subscriber to get all of Virginia's reporting and bonus subscriber-only episodes. Disclaimer: Virginia is a journalist and human with a lot of informed opinions. Virginia is not a nutritionist, therapist, doctor, or any kind of health care provider. The conversation you're about to hear and all of the advice and opinions she and her guests give are just for entertainment, information, and education purposes only. None of this is a substitute for individual medical or mental health advice.FAT TALK is out! Order your signed copy from Virginia's favorite independent bookstore, Split Rock Books (they ship anywhere in the US!). Or order it from your independent bookstore, or from Barnes & Noble, Amazon, Target, or Kobo or anywhere else you like to buy books. You can also order the audio book from Libro.fm or Audible.CREDITSThe Burnt Toast Podcast is produced and hosted by Virginia Sole-Smith and Corinne Fay. Follow Virginia on Instagram, Follow Corinne  @SellTradePlus, an Instagram account where you can buy and sell plus size clothing and subscribe to Big Undies.The Burnt Toast logo is by Deanna Lowe.Our theme music is by Jeff Bailey and Chris Maxwell.Tommy Harron is our audio engineer.Thanks for listening and for supporting anti-diet, body liberation journalism.  This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit virginiasolesmith.substack.com/subscribe

This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit virginiasolesmith.substack.com/subscribeWelcome to Indulgence Gospel After Dark! It's time for your July Extra Butter! Today we are discussing the intersection of sobriety and diet culture—and taste testing a whole bunch of mocktails!If you are already an Extra Butter subscriber, you'll have this entire episode in your podcast feed and access to the entire transcript in your inbox and on the Burnt Toast Substack. To get all of the links and resources mentioned in this episode, as well as a complete transcript, visit our show page. Otherwise, to hear the whole conversation or read the whole transcript, you'll need to join Extra Butter. It's just $99 per year, and is the hands down best way to keep Burnt Toast an ad- and sponsor-free space. PS. Don't forget to order Fat Talk: Parenting In the Age of Diet Culture! Get your signed copy now from Split Rock Books (they ship anywhere in the USA). You can also order it from your independent bookstore, or from Barnes & Noble, Amazon, Target, Kobo or anywhere you like to buy books. (Or get the UK edition or the audiobook!) Disclaimer: Virginia and Corinne are humans with a lot of informed opinions. They are not nutritionists, therapists, doctors, or any kind of healthcare providers. The conversation you're about to hear and all of the advice and opinions they give are just for entertainment, information, and education purposes only. None of this is a substitute for individual medical or mental health advice.CREDITSThe Burnt Toast Podcast is produced and hosted by Virginia Sole-Smith (follow me on Instagram) and Corinne Fay, who runs @SellTradePlus and Big Undies—subscribe for 20% off.The Burnt Toast logo is by Deanna Lowe.Our theme music is by Jeff Bailey and Chris Maxwell.Tommy Harron is our audio engineer.Thanks for listening and for supporting anti-diet, body liberation journalism!

Why do jeans make us FEEL THINGS? I mean, I have a lot of feelings about the “going out top,” but at least I no longer have to deal with it. Jeans, they're still here in my wardrobe, making me feel uncool. It's the actual garment, sure, but it's also a garment in constant fashion flux — and almost always designed to fit one sort of (thin) body. There's no one better to talk about big jeans feelings than Virginia Sole-Smith, who's written a four-part series on ‘jean science' and the relationship between jeans production (and jeans ‘norms') and anti-fatness. Whether you're clinging to your comfort jeans or trying to figure out what shoes to wear with a barrel leg or banishing jeans from your closet, this episode is for you. Join the ranks of paid subscribers and get bonus content, access to the discussion threads, ad-free episodes, and the knowledge that you're supporting an indie pod trying to make its way in the world. If you're already a subscriber-- thank you! Join us in the discussion thread for this episode! Got a question or idea for a future episode? Let us know here. This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit culturestudypod.substack.com/subscribe

My conversations with Michaeleen Doucleff are so much fun that sometimes I forget to hit record!Usually it doesn't even matter what we talk about, but this time it's extra good. You know those times when your kid is acting like a little contrarian. You say up, they say down. You say yes, they say no. And around and around and around.Michaeleen has come up with an amazingly simple sentence that shifts this dynamic like magic.It will turn them not just into collaborators but actual co-creators.Listen as Michaeleen and I discuss oh so many things. I love my time with her so much and I think you will too!In this episode, you'll learn:How to encourage your child to contribute ideas and collaborate in planning activities.The messages about our values that we send when we choose recreation for our kids.Why things that keep kids engaged aren't always as fun as they might seem.And much more! As always, thanks for listening. Head over to Facebook, where you can join my free group Mastermind Parenting Community. We post tips and tools and do pop-up Live conversations where I do extra teaching and coaching to support you in helping your strong-willed children so that they can FEEL better and DO better. If you enjoyed this episode and think that others could benefit from listening, please share it!Get all the links, resources, and transcripts here: https://mastermindparenting.com/podcast-294About Randi RubensteinRandi Rubenstein helps parents with a strong-willed kiddo become a happier family and enjoy the simple things again like bike rides and beach vacays.She's the founder of Mastermind Parenting, host of the Mastermind Parenting podcast, and author of The Parent Gap. Randi works with parents across the U.S.At Mastermind Parenting, we believe every human deserves to have a family that gets along.Randi's Web and Social LinksWebsite: https://mastermindparenting.com/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/mastermindparentingInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/mastermind_parenting/About Michaleen Doucleff:Michaleen Doucleff is an award-winning global health correspondent and the author of Hunt, Gather, Parent: What Ancient Cultures Can Teach Us About the Lost Art of Raising Happy, Helpful Little Humans. https://michaeleendoucleff.com/hunt-gather-parent/ Resources Discussed/LinksThe New York Times profile of Virginia Sole-Smith https://www.nytimes.com/2024/04/21/well/eat/fat-activist-virginia-sole-smith.htmlHer book Fat Talk: Parenting in the Age of Diet Culture https://virginiasolesmith.com/books/fat-talk-parenting-in-the-age-of-diet-culture/All Joy, No Fun: The Paradox of Modern Parenthood, by Jennifer Senior https://jennifersenior.net/all-joy-and-no-funOur 12-week Basics Bootcamp program is now available as a 100% online self-study course! https://mastermindparenting.com/minimasters/Live assessment:

Virginia Sole-Smith joins me on this revisited episode to talk about one of the most difficult, yet most important, pieces of healing from the effects of diet culture: Not passing it on to the next generation. Virginia is such an important voice on raising kids in an anti-diet and weight-inclusive way, on confronting anti-fatness as a parent, and looking back to our own upbringing. She is also a talented writer and journalist (I highly recommend both of her books!) and I highly recommend her podcast, Burnt Toast. There is something for everyone in this episode. Because whether or not we are parents, we've been parented in some way. We chat about… Hard questions and conversations that led to Virginia's book "Fat Talk" “I don't want my kid to have a messed up relationship with food, but I also don't want them to be fat” The Gilmore Girls effect Holding compassion for our moms and their influence on our body image and relationship with food Why mothers bearing the blame of eating disorders and fatness How dads are left out of the conversation and ED research The difference between how fat kids and thin kids are fed Family dinner and diet culture (helpful or harmful?) Having conversations with kids that don't center on weight …and so much more This episode will help you reflect on your own childhood and provide tools to break the inheritance of body shame and disordered eating.   About Virginia: She is the author of the NYT-bestselling FAT TALK: Parenting In The Age of Diet Culture and The Eating Instinct: Food Culture, Body Image and Guilt in America. As a journalist, she has reported from kitchen tables and grocery stores, graduated from beauty school, and gone swimming in a mermaid's tail. Virginia began her career in women's magazines, alternatively challenging beauty standards and gender norms, and upholding diet culture through her health, nutrition and fitness reporting. Motherhood inspired a reckoning, and led to her first book, The Eating Instinct: Food Culture, Body Image and Guilt in America. Her work has also appeared in the New York Times Magazine, Harper's, Scientific American and many other publications. Virginia now writes the popular anti-diet newsletter Burnt Toast and hosts the Burnt Toast Podcast. Enjoying this podcast? Please support the show on Patreon for bonus episodes, community engagement, and access to "Ask Abbie" at Patreon.com/fullplate   Patreon is also home to the episode transcripts (which are publicly available to everyone, not just our patrons!). If you're looking for those, head over to Patreon.   Find the show on Instagram: @fullplate.podcast Find Abbie on Instagram: @abbieattwoodwellness   Looking for more support and concrete steps to take to heal your relationship with food and your body? Apply for Abbie's next 10-week group program: https://www.abbieattwoodwellness.com/group-coaching   Already been at this anti-diet culture thing for a while, but want community and continued learning? Apply for Abbie's monthly membership: https://www.abbieattwoodwellness.com/circle-monthly-group   Podcast Cover Photography by Anya McInroy Podcast Editing by Brian Walters This podcast is ad-free and support comes from our Patrons on Patreon: Patreon.com/fullplate

Plus, provocative and practical ideas about actually enjoying exercise, the real relationship between weight and health, the problem with weight loss, the morality of food, feeding your kids, and who "the real bad guy" is.Virginia Sole-Smith is the bestselling author of Fat Talk: Parenting in the Age of Diet Culture and The Eating Instinct: Food Culture, Body Image and Guilt in America. She also writes the Burnt Toast newsletter, hosts the Burnt Toast Podcast, and frequently contributes to The New York Times and other publications.In this episode we talk about:The actual connections between health and body sizeThe severe limitations of many of the most popular approaches to weight lossNuanced strategies for disentangling from diet cultureHow to exercise without a hidden agenda of trying to wrench your body into a specific shapeThe idea that food doesn't have a moral valueThe relationship between men, exercise, food, and diet cultureHow our kids are getting caught up in diet culture, and what parents can do about itWhat Virginia's smartest critic would say about her contentionsHer take on OzempicRelated Episodes:Dharma teacher Cara Lai on mindfulness and exerciseJud Brewer on “The Hunger Habit”Evelyn Tribole on “The Anti-Diet”Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/tph/podcast-episode/virginia-sole-smithSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.