Brilliantly Resilient

Brilliantly Resilient is back!! After some much needed time off, B.R. is back with new episodes, amazing guests, and more inspiration for you to live a Brilliantly Resilient life. Let us know what you think and reach out at howdy@brilliantlyresilient.net. Be sure to check out www.brilliantlyresilient.net for more! And now, on with the show! Who is to say my day is worth nothing? Take your power back and say "I get to choose." ~ Dr. Jennifer Gardella Are you an entrepreneur or just starting a business? Do you have an area of expertise that has value in the business marketplace? Or are you a "professional volunteer" expected to put up your hand every time someone needs something? It's often difficult to put a value on what we do, particularly if you are just starting a business or do work in an area with societal impact. It's not unusual for people to expect you to give your time or products away for free, or minimal value, especially if you are a woman. (It's hard to believe a man would be asked to give of his time or work for free.) And if you are a known volunteer, it can often feel like your life is up for grabs for anyone who needs anything. On this week's episode, Dr. Jennifer Gardella shares important insights on how to value your work and your time, starting with learning to value yourself.  Dr. Gardella notes that setting boundaries is the first step in taking back your power--and not everyone is going to like it. When we put up boundaries, those who are used to having us behave in a certain way (read--be available on their terms) won't be happy when told, "No." But a little pain will be worth a lot of gain--for you. Tune in for a strategy to accomplish your personal power grab (Awareness, education, empowerment and growth), and be sure to listen for these additional bits of brilliance: You have to get paid for your expertise. You can still do things for free, but you get to choose what and when. Awareness and education lead to empowerment and growth. Your business and personal lives are very enmeshed. Where are your boundaries? You have the right to say, "This is how I'm spending my time." Be ready to acknowledge that things are not working. Dig deep and keep asking "Why?" Learn more about Dr. Gardella at jennifergardella.com. Let's be Brilliantly Resilient together! XO, Mary Fran

Storytelling is a Trojan horse, with our activism inside. It's a much gentler approach to guide someone to a wider lens of understanding, compassion and empathy. ~ Kristen McGuiness Have you ever felt “changed” by a book? Those who love to read–and write–know what it's like to become lost in a story, feeling along with characters and experiencing their trials and triumphs along with them. Kristen McGuiness, founder of Rise Publishing and author of Live Through This, believes in the power of storytelling as a tool to create understanding and change while building alliances for the greater good. An activist against injustice from a young age after losing her father to a long prison sentence, Kristen believes in storytelling as a way to share experiences and encourage others to see a different point of view.  Here at Brilliantly Resilient, we believe that broadening perceptions to include those of others is part of building resilience. When we are willing to look through a different lens, we learn and grow, as well as create alliances with others. Tune into this week's episode of the Brilliantly Resilient podcast to hear more of Kristen's wisdom and pick up your copy of Live Through This. Be sure to listen for these additional bits of brilliance: Books aren't banned because people are ‘afraid of turning gay,' for example. They're banned because we recognize that story connects us and the fear is that a perspective will be changed and you'll become an ally of something others don't like or endorse. If we have the desire to write, we are often writing from a place of pain or hardship, and of someone who has had to overcome that. That is always a story of justice to me and of justice being served in some way. The systems in which we live, like a five day work week with only two days off, can keep us from feeling we have the time to be socially active. We need to make a choice to build more justice in this world. We can make change. Let's be Brilliantly Resilient together! XO,  Mary Fran & Kristin

Building community both in your business and with your customer community is essential. I see community as “common unity.” Everyone in a community has something they care about and we want to be part of that. It's good for employees and good for customers.  ~ Kevin Nolan By their nature, entrepreneurs often start their businesses alone, taking on many roles as they try to build their companies into sustainable, viable organizations. But going it alone, without recognizing the need for a community of support–and for building a community of support for employees–can stop an entrepreneur's dream in its tracks. Kevin Nolan is the founder of Nolan Painting and Nolan Consulting and author of the new book Organizational Muscle. Started to make money while he was in college, Kevin has built Nolan Painting into the nation's largest and most successful family-owned residential painting company. Along the way, he's learned powerful lessons, many of which dovetail with the Brilliantly Resilient tenets of building both a professional and personal foundation on a clear values system. Kevin's success begins with the values he believes in as an individual and makes a part of his business, and which his employees share as well. Citing community as a primary value, Kevin makes certain to imbue his office culture and community outreach with a sense of community building, creating employee and customer loyalty in the process. Be sure to check out Organizational Muscle for dynamic tips and practical strategies for building a business. And listen to Kevin's episode of the Brilliantly Resilient podcast for these additional bits of brilliance: The way to build Organizational Muscle starts with 3 things: mission, vision, values, repeat. If you're not putting the culture in your company, someone else is. You have to work as a team within your business. Human beings work together; make your business a place of collaborative opportunity for everyone. Be careful of Hourglass management. That's when you set yourself up to have to approve each grain of sand as it falls through. The only way to succeed is to get out of the hourglass; get others involved so you aren't constantly overwhelmed.  Organization muscle is building a team, working together and building strength and endurance with routines. Routines are grounding. Let's be Brilliantly Resilient together! XO, Mary Fran & Kristin  

Gratitude is a tool that connects us to our happiness, success and power.  ~ Kristin Smedley & Mary Fran Bontempo NOTE** This episode was previously aired, but it's fun, has a great message and deserves to be run again! Happy Thanksgiving everyone!!! Has it ever occurred to you that gratitude can help you tap into your power? We don't often think of thankfulness as a powerful thing. In fact, some of us feel that being grateful may make us seem weak. Here at Brilliantly Resilient, we are card-carrying members on the gratitude train. Even in our darkest hours, we were thankful for those slivers of light that held us up and gave us hope, whether they came from friends, family, or the experts who helped guide us through our crises. Training the mind to focus on blessings instead of lack opens up the spirit, and okay, we're going a little woo-woo here (with Mary Fran's blessing), the universe, to provide opportunities, connections and the strength to move forward instead of stewing in a pot of blech. Gratitude provides focus, as well as the positive energy necessary to make decisions and take action. This Thanksgiving, remember to be truly grateful for blessings both big and small. Live with an open heart and mind and use gratitude as a tool to live a Brilliantly Resilient life! Happy Thanksgiving! XO, KS & MFB

I don't subscribe to the idea that women, as we get older, we just fall apart. This may sound crazy, but I believe menopause is empowering…after so many years of caring for so many people, this is our time. ~ Julie Gordon White Have you experienced “the pause?” As women, we are all destined to experience menopause, should we reach the age. If we believe the media, that's when we go from Snow White to the old crone–shriveled, dried up and useless. But Julie Gordon White knows it doesn't have to be that way. In fact, with the proper education, nutrition and effort, menopause can be a time of opportunity and growth.  Julie researched the topic and learned that most doctors receive only 1-2 hours of education on menopause, not nearly enough. In fact, Julie learned that menopause is not a life-sentence, it's actually a single day that defines the end of a woman's cycle. After realizing that menopause needn't be an end, Julie founded a company that provides nutritious, energy packed snack bars to help manage symptoms and build a powerful mind and body during menopause. Further, Julie has created a movement where women can talk about a subject that's been taboo for far too long. With a strategy, menopause symptoms can be managed and women can expect to live powerful productive lives for many years to come. Here at Brilliantly Resilient, we believe that self-care is essential to living a healthy, productive and happy life, and that age should never dictate how successful we are when sharing our Brilliantly Resilient gifts with the world. Tune in to hear more of Julie's wisdom, and order some Menowell Bars today! Be sure to listen for these additional bits of brilliance from Julie: We have to educate ourselves as women. We can't depend on our medical professionals because they don't always know. Visit menopause.org. and educate yourself. Then it's about nutrition because what we put in our bodies matters. There are 34 plus symptoms surrounding menopause, and 90% of women experience a ten pound weight gain around the middle. It's visceral fat and dangerous. There is a 70% higher risk of heart disease with visceral fat. Our waist size as women should be 34 inches or less. Mindset in menopause must be a practice. We have to tell ourselves that we can be better, healthier and empowered and keep that in our minds until it becomes natural. Our thinking self can create the experience that we want. Let's be Brilliantly Resilient together! XO,  Mary Fran & Kristin

Normally, because of how I was raised, I would steer clear of anything that was confrontational because I wanted to keep the peace. But I started to wonder, whose peace was I keeping? ~ Donna Marie Hayes How many times have you avoided confrontation to “keep the peace?” How many times have you explained away red flags in relationships or situations because you couldn't or wouldn't face your own doubts and fears? After experiencing great loneliness during her childhood, Donna Marie Hayes felt she was on sure footing. After two failed marriages, Donna took eight years being on her own to build a strong personal foundation. But in her mid-50's, Donna wanted companionship, and found the “love of her life” through an online dating site. For 18 months, her relationship blossomed, until it came crashing down and she discovered she had been scammed, losing all of her money to a man who professed to love her.  On this episode of the Brilliantly Resilient podcast, Donna talks about how her childhood traumas remained to cause her to deny and deflect obvious red flags because she so wanted her relationship to be what it appeared to be on the surface. And once she realized she had been scammed, she fell into a place of shame, not wanting anyone to know what she felt she had allowed to happen to her. As we say in Brilliantly Resilient, it was when Donna armed herself with the truth that she was able to transfer her shame to her abuser, find her peace and later, to use her experiences to help other women rebuild their lives after devastating experiences. To learn more, tune into this episode of the Brilliantly Resilient podcast, and check out Donna's appearance on The Tamryn Hall Show as she talks about her book, These Broken Roads: Scammed and Vindicated, One Woman's Story. Be sure to listen for these additional bits of Brilliance: I thought those eight years of just being by myself prepared me for this, but I got sucked right in, because he was so nice, because I needed that. I needed it to be real, I wanted it to be real. I talked around it (the red flags). How are you showing up in life? Are you showing up diminished? Are you showing up with self-limiting beliefs or are some of your childhood traumas showing up in your adult life? We can't predict what we are going to do; we have to do some self-reflection. The common thread was shame. I decided to tell the story so the next woman who Googles his name is going to see what he did. I'm not going to wear your shame. You wear it. How can I repurpose my pain? How can I use it to benefit others? Let's be Brilliantly Resilient together! XO, Mary Fran & Kristin  

By making best friends with denial and distraction, I was refusing to see what "could be" going on in my life, which was that my son had been struggling for a very long time with substance abuse issues. I kept holding onto what I thought my life and my son "should be," instead of facing and dealing with the truth. ~ Mary Fran Bontempo Have you ever known that a crisis was barrelling down on you but you refused to see it? Some truths are just too hard to face, leading us to deny their existence and distract ourselves with just about anything to keep from facing reality. We're taught from a young age that if we follow "the rules," things will be okay. Do the right thing, and good will follow. Unfortunately, despite our best efforts, it doesn't always work out that way. Yet, giving up on that myth is scary, and can open a Pandora's box of life messes that we just don't want to face. Mary Fran Bontempo, co-founder of Brilliantly Resilient, knows the perils of focusing only on what she thought her life "should be," based on living by the rules. Knowing that her son was having some challenges, Mary Fran denied the severity of what she intuitively felt was wrong, because that wasn't what her life "should be" manifesting. If you follow the rules, things will be okay, right? But by ignoring the truth of what "could be," which was, in fact, that her son had spiraled into serious addiction, Mary Fran almost lost her child. We cannot navigate challenges if we deny them. It's essential to see truth. Maybe what's happening shouldn't be--terrible things shouldn't happen to good people--but only by acknowledging what could be the truth can we begin to find solutions and make our way back to the light. Tune in for more of Mary Fran's insights on this episode of the Brilliantly Resilient podcast, and be sure to get her book, The 15 Minute Master, which tells the story of her son's addiction and how she and her family made their way back to health and healing. Let's be Brilliantly Resilient together! XO, Mary Fran & Kristin

We live stories and beliefs that we've inherited. It can be so difficult to get rid of the trash in our heads that weighs us down. But the truth is that we are all "Women That Influence," we just have to believe that. ~ Sara Canuso   Do you recognize your power to influence? It's not always easy to see how we can impact those in our lives and the world at large, especially when life's minutiae can so quickly weigh us down. But Sara Canuso knows that every woman has the power to influence; we just have to choose to step out of roles that have been assigned to us and step into our futures. Sara is one of the "originals" in terms of empowering women, and a leading authority on women in the workplace. The founder of the dynamic group Women That Influence, Sara has been encouraging women to "live their truth" as they choose it to be, rather than living a story they have inherited. As Sara notes, "carrying around a lot of stories and trash in your head is a heavy load," and one we must release in order to fulfill our potential as leaders, whether in our own families and personal lives, or on a different, more public path. Here at Brilliantly Resilient, we know that it can be a challenge to rise above the everyday; yet each of us has an opportunity, and in fact, an obligation to uncover our personal brilliance and share it with the world Tune into this episode the Brilliantly Resilient podcast to hear more of Sara's wisdom, and check out Women That Influence to learn more about this empowering group. Let's be Brilliantly Resilient together! XO, Mary Fran & Kristin

The most important foundational pillar of being Brilliantly Resilient for me is perception. It is how you are seeing your challenges. Are you looking at your life the way it "should be," or are you seeing what "could be?"  ~Kristin Smedley How do you see your challenges? No one looks at challenges as a blessing, at least not at first. But many people report feeling as though their challenges changed them in positive ways--once the crisis was navigated. Brilliantly Resilient co-founder Kristin Smedley recognizes that challenges can leave us stuck in the negative if we don't intentionally seek a way forward. For us here at Brilliantly Resilient, that way forward frequesntly lies in our perception of our problems. We're often stuck in the way we believe our lives should be, frustrated by circumstances that keep us from living the lives we want, or believe we deserve.  Yet, as Kristin tells us, once we let go of what we believe our lives should be and make room for what could be, we begin to uncover not only solutions to problems, but new ways of seeing the world that provide opportunities for growth, success and happiness.  As we reset with resilience, perception is one of the foundational pillars of living a Brilliantly Resilient life. Tune in to this episode of the Brilliantly Resilient podcast for more of Kristin's wit and wisdom, and be sure to pick up your copy of the book, Brilliantly Resilient, on Amazon! Learn more about Kristin's work at https://kristinsmedley.com/. Let's be Brilliantly Resilient together! XO, Kristin & Mary Fran  

Let's wake up every day and let's be on fire about a contribution that we're making to a broader audience. ~ Aleta Norris What's your purpose? Yes, it's a heavy question–one most of us grapple with often. But we can start to find our purpose once we look beyond ourselves. Aleta Norris, best-selling author of Women Who Spark and Women Who Spark After 50, joins the Brilliantly Resilient podcast to share her wisdom about how to live happy, successful lives when our life journey doesn't always match the visions of our younger selves. Despite experiencing hardships and challenges, Aleta assures women that life, especially in its second half, can contain joy, opportunity, and purpose, provided we learn to look outside of our own circumstances and recognize that good and bad can co-exist. With a process-oriented and pragmatic system, Aleta guides women towards vitality and fulfillment, urging us all to be “fully used up” by the end of our journeys. Here at Brilliantly Resilient, we believe that service to others can open the door to discovering one's purpose and brilliance. Once we tap into our resilience to navigate our challenges and define our values, we not only learn what's most important to us, but we uncover ways we can contribute to the greater good, giving our lives meaning. Tune in for more of Aleta's wisdom and be sure to listen for these additional bits of brilliance: When the yucky stuff hasn't happened yet, we spend time focusing only on ourselves. Those of us who reach that crappy part in our lives are blessed, because that's the wake-up call. Our difficulties are our gift if we decide to make them our gift. Look at your life in decades. The 30's and 40's are very difficult decades. The messy middle. But it's not always going to be like that. Accept it for what it is but remember there is so much ahead. You can be good enough at something. You don't have to be great. I'm a good enough mom. Think about the things you love without having to turn it into a decision right away. Let's be Brilliantly Resilient together! XO, Mary Fran & Kristin  

We are always looking for signs of domestic violence, but we hear them more often than we see them. Domestic violence doesn't always look like broken bones and bruises. I was living in domestic abuse and I didn't even know it. ~ Dr. Jennifer Gardella Do you know anyone who is experiencing domestic abuse? Are you sure? As Dr. Jennifer Gardella aptly notes, domestic abuse is not always visible. In fact, if we listen, we can “hear” domestic abuse more often than we can see it. Cutting through all areas of class, education or outward success, many women are experiencing domestic abuse, but because they don't have the physical bruises to show for it, they themselves don't always recognize that they are living with domestic violence. In her new book, Listen for the Whispers of Abuse, Dr. Gardella, herself a victim of domestic abuse, offers signs of abuse including: Feeling you are always “walking on eggshells” around your partner. Having no control over your money or your personal schedule. Not being allowed to make decisions. Being told you are “crazy” or being yelled at for somehow not measuring up to your partner's expectations. Here at Brilliantly Resilient, we know the importance of a tribe. If you suspect a loved one is experiencing domestic abuse, here are some of Dr. Gardella's suggestions to lend support to the victim: “If you hear any inkling of ‘I need to get out of here' start to talk to your loved one about safety planning.” “Let her know that wherever she is on her journey, you are a safe space and will support her no matter what.” “Reach out to other friends and ask ‘Are we all seeing this?'” “Drip information whenever you can.” Be sure to tune into this episode of The Brilliantly Resilient podcast, get Dr. Gardella's book, and call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 800-799-7233 for more information. Let's be Brilliantly Resilient together! XO, Kristin & Mary Fran  

Some people think of marketing as flash. I was Facebook rich and client poor for 5 years. Stop friending your peers, they aren't your clients. ~ Tai Goodwin Are you an entrepreneur? If you own or promote a business, how much time do you spend posting on social media? Better yet, how much time do you spend posting on social media and assume that you are marketing your business?  Tai Goodwin, founder of That Marketing Team, knows about the distinction. As Tai notes, “The internet has made the barrier of entry very low. But people don't want to do the unsexy research to figure out who their best audience is. There is a skill set that has to be learned to be successful.”  Getting likes on social media makes us feel good. But we can't just post about our business or work and assume the right people are seeing it. As Tai reminds us, we have to do the hard work of digging deep, homing in on our customer base, articulating who we are, and building relationships with our audience.  Here at Brilliantly Resilient, we understand the value of relationships. Yet, it's important to focus on building the right relationships, especially in business. And Tai knows a few things about resilience, too, like recognizing that receiving what we ask for takes the resilience to know we have to do the work to get it. (Be sure to listen from minute 33 on for some true Brilliance from Tai!)  Tune in to hear more of Tai's wisdom on this episode of the Brilliantly Resilient podcast, and find out more about Tai at www.thatmarketingteam.com. Let's be Brilliantly Resilient together! XO, Mary Fran & Kristin  

Getting sucker-punched is part of everyone's journey. Sometimes the most successful people had more worst moments to share with the audience. But it always came back to them being resilient, getting up again, swinging that bat and eventually connecting and hitting that single, double, home run or sometimes grand slam. ~ John Lee Dumas, EOFire Have you ever envied—just a little—people who are highly successful? Have you ever thought their lives were somehow charmed and problem free? Have you ever thought—that could never be me; I've been knocked down too many times? John Lee Dumas has interviewed hundreds of hugely successful entrepreneurs, all with one major thing in common—sucker punches. As JLD notes, no one is spared challenges; it's being willing to tap into your resilience and get up to swing again that makes one successful. Coupled with intense focus, a grateful perspective and action with skills and knowledge, JLD believes that if you have a chance to try, you can move towards a win.   Tune into hear more of JLD's wisdom on this episode of the Brilliantly Resilient podcast, and be sure to check out our episode on EOFire, which JLD has declared one of his classics!   Let's be Brilliantly Resilient together!   XO,   Mary Fran & Kristin

For several seasons we've been bringing you all of the stories about how if we can do it, you can do it. Then it was with our guests, if they can do it, you can do it. But people were asking okay, "But how? How do you do it?"  ~ Kristin Smedley We're back!! Welcome back to a New Season of Brilliantly Resilient Live! As former teachers and moms, September is our New Year. We get excited about new beginnings and this new season of Brilliantly Resilient is just that. We're changing it up a bit this season. We'll still be brining you great content and great guests. But we're also going to dig into what caused us to create Brilliantly Resilient in the first place. We both experienced our own traumatic sucker punches and train wrecks, but after meeting one another we realized that our process to navigate our crises was very similar. It's that process--the how we did it, and still do it--that we're going to offer you in a slightly different way. So this season, you'll be seeing us together, with guests, and separately, as we share our individual takes on what it means to live with a Brilliantly Resilient mindset. As we continue to grow, we want to help you do the same. And to that end, did you know that we bring Brilliantly Resilient on the road? Over the past several years, we've been honored and proud to bring Brilliantly Resilient to many companies, ERGs (Employee Resource Groups), conferences and associations, both in person and virtually. It's a joy to hear how the B.R. process resonates with others both professionally and personally. So if you'd like to have us join you at work or with a group, drop us a line at howdy@brilliantlyresilient.net  or get our speaker kit to learn more. Meanwhile, enjoy this new season and happy September to all! Let's be Brilliantly Resilient together! XO, Mary Fran & Kristin

Doubt can go two ways: One direction leads to fear, the other to hope. ~ Dr. Lee Warren: Hope is the First Dose What does it mean to hope? As children, we hope for a bike for Christmas or a puppy. As we grow, hope may be in the form of a prom date. But as we grow, and life brings its challenges, it becomes harder to hope, sometimes resulting in depression or despair. Dr. Lee Warren has survived more than most--divorce, war, the loss of a child to an unsolved murder. Any one might crush a spirit. Yet Lee continues to turn to hope in God to find meaning and purpose in life, despite admitting to doubt and questioning, which he notes are part of the human journey.  Lee has continued to inspire us here at Brilliantly Resilient with his encouragement and belief--leading us to continue to hope and move towards a greater purpose. Read more about Hope is the First Dose, below and be sure to tune into Lee's episode of the Brilliantly Resilient podcast. To get the full B.R. Summer Reading list, click here. Lee Warren: Hope is the First Dose  A practicing neurosurgeon and award-winning author shares his roadmap to finding hope and even happiness when the worst happens—by placing trust in God—in this powerful memoir of personal tragedy, grief, and recovery. In Hope Is the First Dose, Dr. Warren offers tender empathy and hard-won insights to give you tangible hope. No matter what you're facing, it doesn't have to be the end of you. Let Dr. Warren help you find your way back to a new season of hope, faith, peace—and even happiness. The first dose is hope—and it comes in the form of grace from the skilled hands of the Great Physician. Tune into Lee's episode of the Brilliantly Resilient Podcast! Let's be Brilliantly Resilient together! XO, Kristin and Mary Fran

I went to Ukraine thinking I'd find victims of war and recipients of humanitarian aid. What I found were civilians creatively, consciously engaging in what was going on around them. Every person had their own process as a starting point to resilience. ~ Greta Uehling: 'Everyday War' Can you imagine life in a war zone? For those of us living in the United States, life in a war zone is something we observe from afar. The images we most often see are devastating, showing civilians huddling in fear near bombed out homes and cities. Yet, when Dr. Greta Uehling visited Ukraine to better learn how civilians were coping with the war, she discovered resilience and brilliance as people often “made choices based on others' vulnerability,” discovering also that “relationships became essential to resilience.” Dr. Uehling's book, Everyday War illustrates how individuals found their worldview shifting as they discovered the importance of relationships, awareness of others' suffering and the usefulness of transferable skills in navigating life in a war zone with resilience. Here at Brilliantly Resilient, we've often said that the roots of resilience and brilliance can often be found in service to others. The week's reader's pick illustrated that in a beautiful and poignant way, even amid a war-torn country.  Read on for more on Everyday War and be sure to tun into Dr. Uehling's episode of the Brilliantly Resilient podcast. To get the full Brilliantly Resilient Summer Reading list, click here. Let's be Brilliantly Resilient together! Greta Uehling: Everyday War  In Ukraine, landscapes filled with death and destruction prompted attentiveness to human vulnerabilities and the cultivation of everyday, interpersonal peace. What goes through the mind of a mother who must send her child to school across a minefield or the men who belong to groups of volunteer body collectors? In Ukraine, such questions have been part of the daily calculus of life. Greta Uehling engages with the lives of ordinary people living in and around the armed conflict over Donbas that began in 2014 and shows how conventional understandings of war are incomplete. Everyday War considers where peace can be cultivated at an everyday level. Tune into Dr. Uehling's episode of the Brilliantly Resilient podcast! XO, Kristin and Mary Fran

Bad things happen. It's what we do with them. Grace is defined as an undeserved, unmerited gift. I've been given a gift. ~ Geralyn Ritter: 'Bone by Bone Have you ever experienced devastating trauma? We've all had challenges, but thankfully, most of us have never had to deal with crushing, life-altering trauma. Geralyn Ritter knows what can happen to change life in an instant. In 2015, a terrifying train crash changed Geralyn's life in a moment--forever changing who she was and who she would continue to become. Here at Brilliantly Resilient, we talk often about life's challenges, but rarely do we encounter someone who so perfectly personifies the Brilliantly Resilient mindset. Geralyn has utilized her experiences to become a force of light and life to all who hear her story. Learn more about Geralyn's best seller, Bone by Bone, below: Geralyn Ritter: Bone By Bone  On May 12, 2015, Amtrak 188 derailed outside of Philadelphia going 106 miles per hour. Geralyn Ritter was thrown from the train and sustained catastrophic injuries to her chest, her abdomen, and her pelvis. After enduring weeks in the ICU, dozens of surgeries over the following years, unremitting pain, PTSD, depression, and opioid dependence, Geralyn was faced with a daunting question: beyond mere survival after trauma, where is the path back to joy? Bone by Bone shares her powerful story of resilience with humor, grace, and no-holds-barred honesty. Bone by Bone addresses the long-lasting impact of sudden trauma and extends hope--from the perspective of someone who has been there and back. Tune into Geralyn's episode of the Brilliantly Resilient Podcast! Be sure to pick up a copy of Bone by Bone and click here to get the full Brilliantly Resilient Summer 2023 Reading List! Let's be Brilliantly Resilient together! XO, Mary Fran & Kristin

S.E.L.F. Serve others, Eat and exercise, Learn something, Forgive somebody.   ~ Rob Kenney: 'Dad, How Do I?'   Everyone has, or had, a dad. But not everyone has been lucky enough to have a great relationship with their father.  Rob Kenney, a.k.a. "Dad, How Do I?" was one of those people. After a challenging childhood, Rob eventually became a father himself, and decided to become a virtual dad to anyone who needed one. We've interviewed many folks here at Brilliantly Resilient, and we can honestly say that Rob is one of our absolute favorites. With great warmth, authenticity, and a ton of "dad jokes," Rob forges relationships with people he's never met who come to see him as a surrogate father. Read on for more about this wonderful dad and be sure to check out Rob's book and his episode on the Brilliantly Resilient podcast. Rob Kenney: Dad, How Do I?    Rob Kenney's father left him and his seven siblings when he was fourteen years old, and the youngest had to fend for themselves. He wished that he had someone who could teach him the basics—how to tie a tie, jump-start a car, unclog a drain, use tools properly—as well as succeed in life. Now a father himself, Rob decided that he would help people out by providing how-to tips as well as advice—and even throw in some bad dad jokes. He started a YouTube channel for anyone looking for fatherly advice, gaining millions of views for his how-to and inspirational videos. In this book, Rob shares his story of overcoming a difficult childhood with the strength of faith and family and offers inspiration and hope as well as providing 50 practical DYI instructions. Tune into Rob's episode of the Brilliantly Resilient podcast!  Get the entire Brilliantly Resilient Summer Reading List here! Let's be Brilliantly Resilient together! XO, Kristin & Mary Fran

Look at your calendar from the last few months and see what put a smile on your face. What about those experiences can you do more of? ~ Fran Hauser: 'Embrace the Work, Love Your Career' Does your work make you smile? Not everyone grins when they wake up on Monday mornings thinking of work. Our friend Fran Hauser has a plan to help anyone struggling with work re-evaluate and move forward in the search for meaningful work that satisfies--and yes, makes one smile. Fran Hauser:  Embrace the Work, Love Your Career  Embrace the Work, Love Your Career combines accessible advice, time-tested strategies, creative prompts, and thoughtful exercises into one holistic resource. Each chapter starts with practical advice and includes prompts and exercises to help readers create their own personal career action plans. Through simple, inspiring, and actionable tools, Embrace the Work, Love Your Career teaches women to be empowered to focus on the things that truly matter, set boundaries and, ultimately, realize their full potential. Tune into Fran's episode of the Brilliantly Resilient Podcast! Check out Fran's newest book and get ready to smile as you learn to love your career! Let's be Brilliantly Resilient together! XO, Kristin & Mary Fran

"Create a silver lining. Do something, build something, create something." ~ Dr. David Fajgenbaum, Chasing My Cure Dr. David Fajgenbaum: Chasing My Cure  David Fajgenbaum, a former Georgetown quarterback, was nicknamed the Beast in medical school, where he was also known for his unmatched mental stamina. But things changed dramatically when he began suffering from a form of Castleman disease, an extremely deadly and rare condition. When he relapsed while on the only drug in development and realized that the medical community was unlikely to make progress in time to save his life, Fajgenbaum turned his desperate hope for a cure into concrete action, testing his own blood samples and looking for clues that could unlock a new treatment. His incredible story demonstrates the potency of hope, and what can happen when the forces of determination, love, family, faith, and serendipity collide. Tune into David's episode of the Brilliantly Resilient Podcast! Here at Brilliantly Resilient, we're big believers in not only using transferrable skills to bring your Brilliance to new situations, we're also believers in action–and in knowing that “No” might just mean we need to find another way. (It doesn't happen overnight, but it can happen, if you're willing to “turn hope into action” – more advice from David.) Throughout his journey, David has amassed great wisdom–plus, he's funny and kind. In fact, it was really hard to decide which of his Brilliance Bits to highlight on this episode since everything David offered was a gem that perfectly reflects our Brilliantly Resilient mission. Tune into this episode of the Brilliantly Resilient podcast to be moved, inspired and learn more about how to create your own silver linings–even when times are tough. Let's be Brilliantly Resilient together! XO, KS & MFB  

The gift of suffering is that we are here to help other people who are suffering now. ~ Dr. Lise Deguire: Flashback Girl Few of us get through life without suffering. Yet few have suffered as our friend Lise Deguire, and even fewer have made a life-long committment to help others despite, or perhaps because of, that suffering.  Flashback Girl  At the age of four, Dr. Lise Deguire suffered third-degree burns on 65% of her body as the result of both maternal and corporate negligence. Against the odds, she lived through the trauma, beginning decades of treatment as a burn survivor. Dr. Deguire recounts her childhood with two narcissistic parents and their futile struggles to find happiness. She tells the tragic story of her family, which includes artistic genius, stark neglect, and four suicides. Most importantly, she explains her long but ultimately triumphant path towards love, health, and life satisfaction. Tune into Dr. Deguire's episode of the Brilliantly Resilient Podcast, and don't forget to get our Summer Reading List for all of the exceptional books by our Brilliantly Resilient podcast guests! Here's the link: https://lp.constantcontactpages.com/su/mKHezKP  Here's to a Brilliantly Resilient Summer! XO, Kristin & Mary Fran    

Week 3 of the Brilliantly Resilient Summer Reading List! Life not turning out exactly as you planned? Read about how to limit your "pity party" and find renewed purpose, energy and perspective from our friend Keith Baldwin in A Leap Year of Firsts!   Limit your Pity Party. I threw a hell of a Pity Party, but those emotions don't help you with solutions or move you forward. ~  Keith Baldwin, 'A Leap Year of Firsts' A Leap Year of Firsts When Keith Baldwin started his innocent and fun quest of "firsts" onJanuary 1st, 2020, it ended up turning into a year like no other. Rida along as Keith takes you on a journey where we experienced a pandemic like 1918, unemployment and depression like the Great One in 1929, civil unrest like the 1960's, and an election that brought back images of our Civil War. Although it was a year with "firsts," it also was a year when the author discovered his "WHY." Tune into Keith's episode of the Brilliantly Resilient Podcast!        

Week 2 of Brilliantly Resilient Reading! Read more about Game Changer by Pictionary creator Rob Angel! I had to break things down into smaller pieces. I couldn't handle the entire thing at once; my mind doesn't work that way. ~ Rob Angel, Creator of Pictionary and Author of ‘Game Changer' Who hasn't played Pictionary as a kid--or as an adult?! It's a classic, and we've got our Brilliantly Resilient friend, Rob Angel, the creator of Pictionary, here to talk about his book, Game Changer! Game Changer tells the story of how Rob and his college friends created the world's most popular game, and Rob drops more than a few Brilliance Bits in this interview. You won't want to miss it! Rob Angel: Game Changer  "In Game Changer, Rob shares the remarkable inside story of taking Pictionary from simple idea to iconic global brand by breaking rules and breaking records, never giving up or giving in, and working harder when most would walk away all while having the time of his life. Candid and compelling, Game Changer is as much a captivating memoir as it is a blueprint to personal and professional success." Tune into Rob's episode of the Brilliantly Resilient Podcast!       C  

Our Summer Reading list is here!! First up, our friend and mentor to women, Selena Rezvani, with her new book, Quick Confidence! Read on for more…. Experiment with dog-code and initiate a warm hello. When we start with warmth, it's like a door that we open. Be curious, ask questions, be empathetic. Start with warmth and focus on your competence later. ~ Selena Rezvani How confident are you? It may depend upon circumstances or your environment in a particular moment, but all of us have suffered a crisis of confidence at one time or another.  Here comes best-selling author and Brilliantly Resilient friend, Selena Rezvani with tons of do-able, practical and simple tips and tricks to help everyone to feel more confident no matter what the situation. Here's more on Selena's new book! Selena Rezvani: Quick Confidence  In Quick Confidence: Be Authentic, Create Connections and Make Bold Bets On Yourself, best-selling author and renowned leadership speaker Selena Rezvani delivers an effective and eye-opening new approach to building confidence and presence for professionals. In the book, the author walks you through―and helps you leap over―the 9 most common obstacles that stand in the way of building authentic confidence. She offers digestible actions, behaviors, and exercises you can use to change the way you think and the way you present yourself to others. A hands-on playbook for professionals at all stages looking for effective confidence-building advice that goes beyond “fake it ‘til you make it,” Quick Confidence is a fun and rewarding journey to a renewed self-image and enhanced well-being.

GET OUR SUMMER READING LIST!!! If you're like us, you're gonna need some resilience reminders and some super strategies from some of our most favorite guests all summer long. You'll get the book selections and the podcast episodes. ~ Kristin & Mary Fran It's SUMMER!!! We love summer here at Brilliantly Resilient, especially because it means Beach Reads!! And have we got a list for you! From some old favorites (Pictionary creator Rob Angel's story in Game Changer and Rob Kenney's Dad How Do I?) to some inspiring new best-sellers like Selena Rezvani's Quick Confidence and Geralyn Ritter's Bone By Bone, we're bringing you some amazing stories by some of our favorite Brilliantly Resilient authors, podcast guests, and yep, they're our buddies! Starting the first week of July, 2023, you can visit www.brilliantlyresilient.net to get a download of our 2023 Summer Reading List! The list provides not only great reads and book titles, but a link to the Brilliantly Resilient podcast episode featuring each brilliant guest! We're super excited about this year's addition (Can you tell by how many exclamation points we've used???!!!!!) and we know you will be, too. Be sure to visit the Brilliantly Resilient podcast each week for more inspiration and enjoy a summer of spectacular reading! Let's be Brilliantly Resilient together!! XO, Kristin & Mary Fran  

I try and bridge the world between the visual and tactile worlds. You must touch the artwork. It's a way to physically engage with the art. My artwork allows you to chat with it, chat with strangers next to it, and have a conversation. ~ Clarke Reynolds We humans love to talk. It's our primary means of communication, and one specific to us as living beings. Yet so many of our conversations in this world are fraught with anger, mistrust and frustration.  Clarke Reynolds wants to change that. As a blind artist, Clarke is intent on changing people's perception of blindness through his artwork–and sparking conversation.  Despite a challenging childhood, health issues and deteriorating eyesight, Clarke was determined to follow his dreams. With his sketchbook as his role model and his “shrink,” Clarke worked hard, evolving with his circumstances and using his art to tactically communicate with both the sighted and unsighted worlds. By creating a bridge through his work, Clarke helps others find commonality in experience, sparking positive interactions–and conversations. Here at Brilliantly Resilient, we understand the need to evolve. Life doesn't stand still, and neither can we if we want to live happy, fulfilling lives. That rarely means that things work out according to plan, but by keeping our mental conversations positive and focusing on doing the work, we can make an impact–even if it's not the same one we envisioned. (And it's often even better!) To hear more from Clarke, check out his website at https://www.seeingwithoutseeing.com/ and tune in to this week's edition of the Brilliantly Resilient podcast. Be sure to listen for these additional bits of brilliance: Braille is a great ice breaker; you can physically use it to tell stories. We live in a coding age. Braille is just a different way to code. Braille is just a new language, as is coding. I just show off the thought in color and shape and size. It's color-coded Braille. Having a platform has given me the impetus to make change, but you have to work hard.Being famous is about changing other people's perception of blindness. Being blind has made me a better artist–a better person. Finding your personal spark is key to resilience. Every job needs that spark of creativity. We're living too serious a life now.  Let's be Brilliantly Resilient together! XO, Kristin and Mary Fran  

The goal is to provide support for the workforce. The pandemic really forced this to the forefront from a mental health and employee retention standpoint. We were taking care of everything and everyone and there was no way to hide that anymore. You can sustain a healthy work/life balance and we shouldn't have to hide that. ~ Margaret Guerette, Reliance Matrix Co-Chair of the Women's Employee Resource Group (ERG) Have you ever felt the need to put on your "happy hat" at work to convince colleagues and bosses that you've got everything under control, despite being overwhelmed and utterly stressed out? Did you ever hear the term "work/life balance" and want to scream--just a little?  Prior to the pandemic, work/life balance was touted as something workers could achieve just by talking about it–and it was on them to make it happen. Support for employees from within the corporate structure to help them achieve that balance was rare, as workers hesitated to share their challenges while on the job. As Margaret Guerrette from Reliance Matrix tells us, Covid changed all of that. As employees “zoomed” to work from home, the world saw in real time just how difficult a work/life balance was to achieve. Workers' mental health was under attack like never before, and companies recognized the desperate need to provide their workforce with support, for the good of the worker as well as the organization. Enter the Employee Resource Group (ERG), a now formal umbrella term for corporate associations within an organization specifically designed to provide support for employees. The groups are often populated by workers sharing a specific identifier–women, LGBTQ, Hispanic, etc.–and bring together workers from across the company to share challenges, solutions and mentorship. Margaret notes, “The diversity of thought from women at all corporate levels and from different backgrounds makes us this power group; it's wonderful to see!” Here at Brilliantly Resilient, we know the value of a tribe. When companies recognize the need to support their employees in their entirety as people, everyone benefits, both with employee as well as consumer retention. Plus, it's just the right thing to do. Kudos to Reliance Matrix and all organizations that support their workforce with ERGs or BRGs. To hear more from Margaret about how to start an ERG within your organization, tune into this episode of the Brilliantly Resilient podcast, and be sure to listen in for these additional bits of brilliance: We should be, as companies, supporting  workforces in the efforts to be seen, stay healthy, and to have a healthy balance because you can do both. You can caretake, you can do well in your job, and it doesn't have to be one or the other. One of the true values of ERGs is that connectivity piece…we do have this community at work and your direct team might not understand everything that you're going through, but somebody at your company does and somebody can be a support for you. It really has to come from the top down. You have to see your senior leaders, your CEO and senior leadership team support that because employees at more entry level positions aren't going to feel able to participate fully in that type of work unless they know that leadership supports it. We're really lucky at Reliance Matrix to have that kind of leadership. The things you learn in an ERG transcend to other pieces of work. You feel that community and remember that human connection and everything works better. To learn more about Reliance Matrix, visit www.reliancematrix.com or Reliance Matrix on LinkedIn. Let's be Brilliantly Resilient together! XO, Mary Fran & Kristin  

If I don't ask, I have a zero percent chance of getting what I want or need. I had to keep trying. Through persistence you can solve problems. ~ Judy Chinitz Have you ever tried to get a point across to someone but couldn't find the right words? Most of us occasionally struggle to find the right words to communicate our thoughts. But what if you couldn't communicate at all? What if you were trapped in a body incapable of speaking or sharing your thoughts? Worse, what if everyone around you believed you were profoundly mentally handicapped and incapable of even having intelligent thoughts let alone sharing them? Judy Chintiz spent 25 years of her son's life thinking exactly that, only to find after empowering her son with a unique method of communication that Alex had an even higher IQ than normal and was really very intelligent–he just couldn't tell her. Judy's remarkable journey with her son, Alex, reminds us that persistence is key to any success, even if it seems a situation is hopeless. Despite frustration after frustration, Judy refused to give up, ultimately finding the tool to give Alex a voice and freeing him to express his thoughts. (Alex is enrolled in a college program this fall!) Now a founder of the Mouth to Hand Learning Center, Judy has brought the voices of the silent to the world through her work and through her book, Spellbound: The Voices of the Silent, which features the work of those previously unable to communicate. Here at Brilliantly Resilient, we know the power of persistence. When you believe with all your heart and you do the work, you will find answers. They may not always be the exact answers you want, and the path may be different than what you choose, but the journey will be fruitful.  Tune in to hear more about Judy and Alex and be sure to listen for these additional bits of brilliance! After my son was diagnosed with autism, my life was set. That was my path. I asked him “How did you bear it?” (Being unable to communicate.) He said, “I always believed that one day you would figure out that I was smart. The more you “prove” that someone can't meet the goals, the more the diagnosis is confirmed. But we're focusing on what they can't do. The things they can do are not explored. The 72 hour rules–I can feel as sorry for myself as I want for 72 hours. But after 72 hours, you're done. You have to allow people to feel what they feel. But feeling sorry for yourself doesn't accomplish anything. Let's be Brilliantly Resilient together! XO, Kristin & Mary Fran  

Long story short, I was a disgruntled cubicle monkey who followed the rules believing they would make me happy. Spoiler alert: They did not. ~ Shereen Thor Did you have a life plan? Most of us did. We thought if we chose an “acceptable” career path, did the “right” things and followed all of the rules, life would be grand. Except it doesn't always work out that way. For many of us, “acceptable” career paths and life choices don't make us happy, usually because the roads are rigid and don't allow us to stretch to be who we really are. Yet, making a decision (and then sticking with it) to deviate from the “right” path can seem impossible, especially when we believe we will be disappointing those who see success differently. Shereen Thor, former cubicle monkey, standup comic and entrepreneur, discovered first-hand that making choices to fulfill someone else's idea of success rarely ends well. As she began to feel she was abandoning her own life, Shereen tuned into her inner rebel and did the unthinkable–she left corporate America to become a standup comic, living happily ever after…or not. As Shereen notes, “You are going to experience hard things whether you are on the right path or not, but the right path makes the challenges worth it.” Here at brilliantly Resilient, we know that life is ever-evolving, always offering a mix of good and bad. But when you choose to live with a Brilliantly Resilient, values-based mindset, the rough spots are a little less rough–and always come with a lesson to help move you forward. Tune in to hear more of Shereen's wisdom on this week's episode of the Brilliantly Resilient podcast. And be sure to listen for these additional bits of brilliance: Standup comedy was terrifying, but I wanted a different life. I was tired of abandoning myself. One of the rules I was breaking was that negative emotions are bad and that I'm bad if I'm experiencing negative emotions. We have to make more space for the gray. We have to live a values-aligned life instead of abandoning ourselves to what we're supposed to want. What does your heart tell you? Don't worry about fixing everything. You don't need to be fixed; your worth is inherent. There's nothing ‘wrong.' Don't shrink to fit for anything or anyone–ever. I am unwilling to be treated badly–ever. Let's be Brilliantly Resilient together! XO, Mary Fran & Kristin  

When dance was taken away during Covid, I had to say, ‘Who am i?” I realized dance was external, so I had to dig deep and realize what I loved about dance and see how I could put those things into myself and put them into other things. I've transferred those skills over and do one thing at a time. Ask yourself ‘What am I made of? What else do I have?” ~ Paige Leigh DeAngelo Did you lose anything during Covid? All of us lost something or someone, and some losses were far more painful than others. But even seemingly minor losses had profound effects, causing us to question our identities, our past decisions and our futures. A dancer since early childhood, Paige DeAngelo lost that part of her identity when she was unable to dance on stage during Covid. Initially grieving that loss, Paige eventually looked inward to determine what skills she had learned during her dance career that she could transfer to other passions. In 2021, after recalling the copious amount of makeup used during her dance days, Paige founded Aer Cosmetics, creating a sustainable mascara that allows the user to buy a small tablet of mascara as a refill, using the product's original tube, rather than buy an entirely new unit every time. Now a recipient of over $70,000 in grants and business competition winnings, Paige is a full-fledged entrepreneur and will be bringing her product to market in the near future. Here at Brilliantly Resilient, we love Paige's emphasis on utilizing her transferable skills to rebuild her life after Covid's sucker punch. What transferable skills can you bring to other areas of your life? Tune into this episode of the Brilliantly Resilient podcast to hear more of Paige's words of wisdom, and listen for these additional bits of brilliance: I realized at a very young age that if I wanted something I was going to have to do it myself. I determine my final outcome. Everything is “figureoutable”–you just have to do it. You have to sit in the discomfort and be okay with it. You can't make decisions about your life because you don't want to disappoint someone else. Your closed doors are just as valuable as open doors. Let's be Brilliantly Resilient together! XO, Mary Fran & Kristin  

We have to change the idea of menopause as a four-letter word. Who do you trust? Where would you go for care? Take care of your mental state. Do whatever it is that makes you feel good. For me it's meditation, being in nature, exercise. Eat well. Be mindful; be aware. Talk to your doctor. Find the resources that are right for you. ~ Catherine Grace O'Connell The “M” word. If you're a woman, menopause looms in your life as something to dread–the end of vitality and usefulness. At least, that's the way it used to be. Catherine Grace O'Connell, the founder of  Forever Fierce: MIdlife Matters and Modlife Media, knows the power of women in midlife. A self-described “Ageism Positivist, Catherine sums up midlife for women like this: “Women at Midlife & Beyond are the Perfect Storm. We are the first demographic in history to have health and vitality, wisdom and life experience, and a pocketbook to match. We are a fierce creative force balanced by compassion and empathy. It's time we make our presence known!” Part sage, inspiration, practical advice, and all fierce fabulousness, Catherine has mastered her own challenges and turned midlife into a powerful period of creativity, using her wisdom and smarts to guide others to embrace midlife and find the joys and power within. Here at Brilliantly Resilient, we love Catherine's spirit, can-do attitude and her practical strategies for making the most of modern midlife. (And she looks amazing, too!) To hear more of Catherine's wisdom, tune into this week's episode of the Brilliantly Resilient podcast, and be sure to listen in for these additional bits of brilliance: Most women at midlife are exhausted from the duty side of life. Those sparks of creativity and joy need to be honored. We must use our voice to inspire others and be who we are supposed to be. The urgency of the timeliness of life is our soul pushing us and saying, ‘Hey, are you going to get on track for why you're really here?' Your heart starts speaking and telling you there's a reason you love what you love. There is a phoenix rising effect that you're rising from your old life's ashes. We're hungry for real authenticity. I was shaming myself for all of these things, but then I realized they are my strengths. The more struggles I overcame, I built my strength, I built my character. Let's be Brilliantly Resilient together! XO, Kristin & Mary Fran

I went to Ukraine thinking I'd find victims of war and recipients of humanitarian aide. What I found were civilians creatively, consciously engaging in what was going on around them. ~ Dr. Greta Uehling Can you imagine life in a war zone? The residents of Ukraine have lived amidst devastating war and crisis for years, first with the invasion of the Crimean Peninsula and now with Russia's further invasion starting in 2022. For those of us living in the United States, life in a war zone is something we observe from afar. The images we most often see are devastating, showing civilians huddling in fear near bombed out homes and cities. Yet, when Dr. Greta Uehling visited Ukraine to better learn how civilians were coping with the war, she discovered resilience and brilliance as people often “made choices based on others' vulnerability,” discovering also that “relationships became essential to resilience.” Dr. Uehling's book, Everyday War illustrates how individuals found their worldview shifting as they discovered the importance of relationships, awareness of others' suffering and the usefulness of transferable skills in navigating life in a war zone with resilience. This week's powerful interview with Dr. Uehling illustrates the concepts of how to live a Brilliantly Resilient life in the most challenging of circumstances, highlighting the power of employing our transferable skills in service to others. Even Dr. Uehling's personal journey to Ukraine required a willingness to evolve with changing situations, and not being married to a particular outcome. Tune into this week's episode of the Brilliantly Resilient podcast to hear more of Dr. Uehling's wisdom, and be sure to listen for these additional bits of brilliance: I had to let go of my previous agenda. I couldn't control the occupation of Crimea, but I still had the power of my pen. In my case, the anthropological skill set was very transferable and for me that was empathetic listening. The wife of a doctor found new life assisting people, finding resilience together with others, through the everyday ethic of care. You improvise your own ethics and decide what's right. People get to live another day. Value is placed on the gift of being alive; that's what's important. Let's be Brilliantly Resilient together! XO, Kristin & Mary Fran

Don't pre-plan a negative experience for yourself. Stop yourself within 17 seconds to keep a negative thought seed from germinating. Stop the negative thoughts and don't attract that negative vibration. ~ L.A. Williams How often do you look towards an upcoming event, goal, work or personal situation, and think, “This isn't going to go the way I want?" Most of us are guilty of sometimes assuming the worst of a situation even before it happens. Whether it's a form of self-protection, preparing for what we believe is certain disappointment, or planning a next step after failure, we focus on the potential negative outcome far more than we allow ourselves to consider the positive.  Blind for the last 35 years and now a highly successful businessman, L.A. Williams has experienced negativity, and knows that allowing a negative mindset to take root will only bring on more of the same. Once we plant an idea or outcome in our minds, the brain begins to work on that scenario, helping us to consciously or unconsciously achieve exactly what we are telling ourselves will happen. It's essential to stop negativity in its tracks before it takes root–and setting a mental timer to get off the doom and gloom carousel is just the solution. Here at Brilliantly Resilient, we've also welcomed failure with open arms by allowing it to grab hold of our minds. When we believed things wouldn't work out, they didn't, at least in part because all of our mental energy was preparing the way for us to fail. We're believers in intention and mindset. At the very least, living hopefully is a heck of a lot better than living miserably. At best, we've found over and over that showing negativity the door and setting a lovely place for success leads us precisely in that direction. To hear more of L.A.'s wisdom, tune into this week's episode of the Brilliantly Resilient podcast. And be sure to listen for these additional bits of brilliance: I didn't want anyone putting any limits on me. The only thing I can't do that you can do is see. If you're going to be successful, you have to bring the authenticity. People can see, smell and feel the phony coming off you. Let me show you why that is incorrect. I'll show you how I can take the limits and throw them to the side. There are multiple ways to do anything in life and I just have to find out the way I can do it. Adversity University is one of the best places to go to if you want to learn about life. The classes are going to be hard, but it's so worth it. Life is a team game–you have to find the players and coaches who can help you. Instead of assuming there is nothing, we have to ask the questions. You can attract answers by asking the questions. Every answer is out there. Let's be Brilliantly Resilient together! XO, Kristin & Mary Fran  

We need to slow down our conversations and not just say, “I'm fine,” when people ask how we are feeling. ~ Nick Jonsson How often do you respond, “I'm fine” when someone asks how you are feeling? It's almost automatic–partly because it's a standard greeting, but also because many of us believe that sharing our feelings, especially if we don't feel like rainbows and sunshine, is a sign of weakness. Being vulnerable and admitting to feeling lonely, stressed, anxious or depressed is particularly taboo if you're an executive in today's business world. We expect our leaders to be strong, even if that means they must ignore their humanity and the negative feelings that sometimes come with it. The problem is that refusing to acknowledge or manage those feelings only compounds the problem, weakening the ability to lead and live effectively and happily. Nick Jonsson knows first-hand the perils of suppressing negative feelings. After moving to a foreign country, leaving friends and family behind, Nick struggled with isolation and turned to some unhealthy ways to manage the strain. It was after a friend's suicide that he realized the problem was more widespread than simply personal.  Nick founded the Executives' Global Network–a confidential peer networking group of over 700 executives to share their challenges, receive support and learn. He also authored Executive Loneliness: The 5 Pathways to Overcoming Isolation, Stress, Anxiety and Depression in the Modern Business World, and created a suicide prevention organization. Here at Brilliantly Resilient, we know that life isn't always brilliant. Anyone can experience negative feelings–regardless of how things look to those on the outside. Building a tribe of support is essential to mental health, as is allowing ourselves to acknowledge our vulnerability. Once we do, we often find a community of others who not only feel the same way, but serve as a source of strength as we regain our emotional equilibrium. To hear more of Nick's wisdom, tune into this episode of the Brilliantly Resilient podcast, and be sure to listen for these additional bits of brilliance: Executive men especially keep secret and silent until we can't cope any more and we turn to other things that can end up harming us. Vulnerability and being able to speak openly and honestly about what we're feeling is a gift. We need to find safe places to talk about how we feel. Many people are not responding. They are terrified about opening up. There is so much shame or guilt. We don't have the tools to manage our relationships and feelings of isolation as executives. You can't expect your team to talk to you if you aren't willing to be vulnerable yourself. We need to exercise our muscle of vulnerability. Dare to be vulnerable and show that you're human. We can learn to cultivate a healthy mind and lead with empathy by embracing vulnerability, building resilience through personal experience and the journey to emotional intelligence, and supporting our community. Let's be Brilliantly Resilient together! XO,  Mary Fran & Kristin  

Be seen, heard and remembered. I had a whole period of my life where I was afraid to use my voice. I was afraid to be visible. I could have done so much more if I hadn't been afraid to be visible. Start being visible. ~ Mildred Talabi Have you ever found yourself wanting to speak up about something but you remained silent? Whether it's because we lack the confidence to speak up, we think our opinion isn't valuable, or we feel less than others in the room–especially at work–it's not uncommon for people, especially women, to stay silent rather than speak up and have all eyes on us. When we're visible, that means we can be vulnerable. We step into the spotlight and take the chance others won't like us or what we stand for. But what if the opposite happens? What if our message resonates with others and we can finally find the purpose in life that we've been seeking? Mildred Talabi, this week's guest on the Brilliantly Resilient podcast, knows how it feels to watch life go by on the sidelines. It wasn't until a major health crisis caused Mildred to recognize that she was letting opportunities to live life on her terms pass by that she knew she had to to step into the spotlight, speak up, and make an impact.  Today, Mildred is an author and leader of the Visible Women Tribe and also teaches others how to build a brand on LinkedIn by using the platform as a community to build the bonds of personal and professional trust and share their brilliance with the world.  Here at Brilliantly Resilient, we know the power of a supportive tribe, and we also believe in speaking up and owning your brilliance. Each of us has the potential to share that brilliance with others to make the world a better place. Tune in to this week's episode of the Brilliantly Resilient podcast to hear more of Mildred's wisdom and be sure to listen for the additional bits of brilliance: There was a gift in my adversity. I knew I had to decide what was really important in my life and how I wanted to live. Here's how you can become visible on LikedIn: PACE Profile–Who are you? Audience–Who is your audience? Content–Your vehicle to be seen Engagement–LinkedIn is about engagement and building community. Use LInkedIn as a community space and be personal. If you're going to build a personal brand, you can't avoid the personal When you add the personal content, people get to know you. It helps to strengthen the bond and build trust.  Let's be Brilliantly Resilient together! XO, Kristin and Mary Fran

Having the hard conversations with a loved one and then sharing what we've learned can be a gift to others who love that person but can't have those conversations. The Five Wishes helped me start those conversations. ~ Yvonne Caputo How much do you enjoy having hard conversations? If you're like most of us, you'd rather go to the dentist than have a difficult conversation with a loved one–or anyone, for that matter. Hard conversations are, well, hard. They frequently involve intense and unpleasant emotions, and we only venture into that territory when we've exhausted every other means of avoiding the situation. But Yvonne Caputo, this week's guest on the Brilliantly Resilient podcast, has experienced the upside of hard conversations–getting to know a loved one better and honoring him towards the end of, and after his life. Yvonne is the author of Flying with Dad and Dying with Dad, two books that prove the value of asking difficult questions and listening (deeply, as Yvonne says), to the answers. While it wasn't easy to initiate those conversations, Yvonne found help in utilizing a document titled The Five Wishes, which encourages conversations about end of life care and the needs and wishes of those relying on others for care. After asking the tough emotional questions, Yvonne found that the answers prompted more loving and enlightening conversations with her father about his life. Having challenging conversations, no matter the topic, is never easy. Yet once we begin asking questions and seeking answers, we often find new information that makes a situation easier to understand and navigate. Part of being resilient is having the courage to move forward even when we don't really want to. Tune in to hear more of Yvonne's wisdom on this week's episode of the Brilliantly Resilient podcast and be sure to listen for these additional bits of brilliance: The more I asked questions, the more he trusted me. And I began to understand my father on a deeper level. The five wishes was a critical document. It took an advance directive for a parent and brought out all the heart. By asking the questions, I found discovery after discovery about my father. Knowing what my father wanted, I was able to honor him. By knowing what people want, we can ease their transition for us and them. Let's be Brilliantly Resilient together! XO, Kristin and Mary Fran  

Nobody told us we couldn't change the world, so we thought we could. ~ Lynn Cummings What would your ideal world look like? Lynn Cummings and her husband, parents of 3 adopted children (all abused) are a mixed race family. For Lynn, a diverse neighborhood full of welcoming people, regardless of race, was the dream. Yet, when people of color began moving into Lynn's suburban neighborhood years ago, Lynn noticed the sale signs that soon sprouted up on the lawns of her white neighbors. Lynn notes, “I was so happy to see the neighborhood that I wanted to live in and so sad to see others wanted to leave because of that.” Long a believer in the simple phrase, “Just do your bit,” Lynn and her husband decided to do something about what they saw as an opportunity to create the welcoming environment they wanted for their children and others. They started an organization called  “Neighbors Empowering People” to stop white flight in their town. Today, Lynn's neighbors include multiple ethnicities all engaged in a thriving community. Being Brilliantly Resilient isn't hard. All it really takes is action, commitment and passion for your values. When we all simply “Do our bit,” with positive intention and energy, we actually can change the world. Tune in for more of Lynn's wisdom on this week's episode of the Brilliantly Resilient podcast, and be sure to listen for these additional bits of brilliance: Part of my motivation was to help create the world I wanted my children to live in. In order to make change, you have to go to the power structures. We began to work on stable integration. The building up of the body and the community. That's really what resilience means. Let's be Brilliantly Resilient together! XO, Kristin and Mary Fran  

If you're only subscribing to someone else's version of success, it's not going to make you happy because it's not your version; you never really wanted it. We have to take time on the front end to figure out what that success means to us. ~ Matthew Turner How do you define success? For most of us, the word “success” is tied to professional recognition, money and some level of prestige. But do those things truly bring happiness? And what is the cost of achieving them? Author Matthew Turner explores those questions in his latest book, Beyond the Pale, in which his protagonist achieves society's version of success, only to find he never truly wanted it. In this fictional account, Ferdinand fulfills the expectations of what he was told was success, only to discover that success means something entirely different to him personally.  According to Matthew, personal success means different things to different people–one size doesn't fit all. The way to discover what success means to each of us begins with focusing on the one thing we truly own–our values, and moving forward from there.  Here at Brilliantly Resilient, we believe that defining personal values is the first step to accessing resilience and rising after challenges. When we act based on what is genuinely important to us, we follow our true path and open the door to opportunities that resonate with us–helping us to define our own versions of success, and allowing our brilliance to shine. It's not always easy to change; as Matthew reminds us, Whenever you have an awakening, it's almost always easier to roll over and stay asleep, but it is worth it. Take time to decide what success means to YOU, and jettison the guilt you may feel at abandoning a path that may not lead you to where you really want to be. Tune in to hear more from Matthew on this episode of the Brilliantly Resilient podcast, and be sure to listen for these additional bits of Brilliance: Whenever you have an awakening, it's almost always easier to roll over and stay asleep. How dare you have the audacity to change your mind? We put a lot of guilt into changing our minds. We spend too little time focusing on our individual values and principals. If you don't have values, what do you own? They are your version of doing the right thing. We spend too little time focusing on our individual values and principals. If you don't have values, what do you own? They are your version of doing the right thing. Replace success with meaning and purpose and recognize that success is malleable. Really successful people define success on their own terms. They deconstruct society's idea of success and create their own. Let's be Brilliantly Resilient together! XO,  Kristin and Mary Fran  

You have to trust yourself. If I didn't trust myself when everything went wrong, I wouldn't be where I am. Even if you trust yourself though, you also have to have someone else trust you. It's okay to not be okay. It's okay to feel what you feel. Keep talking and someone will eventually listen.  ~ Gabi Drobot No sleep. Lousy diets. Stress and continuous overwhelm. Feelings of failure. Sounds awful, doesn't it? Yet, that's precisely what many of our college students experience every day. In our idealized vision of college life, we see the independence and fun of college life–the partying, the fun, the self-absorption that comes with the freedom of life away from home and its obligations. Yet, at least half of all college students report feeling exhausted, overwhelmed and unable to keep up.  As Gabi Drobot reports, this lack of self-care is epidemic, and sometimes even glamorized, by the young people experiencing its effects.  A college sophomore and staff writer for the paper at her university, Gabi developed an interest in spotlighting mental health for students after experiencing her own challenges and recognizing the lack of helpful, open conversation around the subject. Gabi has become an advocate for encouraging students not to see ignoring self-care as a badge of honor, but rather to recognize the perils to both present and future when students fail to take physical and mental care of themselves. Here at Brilliantly Resilient, we know how challenging it can be to carve out time to minister to oneself. Life's obligations often mean we are last on our own lists. Yet the effects of ignoring our physical and mental health can quickly damage our personal and professional lives, causing cracks in the very foundations we are trying desperately to keep strong. Remember to take time for self-care–especially by getting enough sleep!--and watch for signs that the young people in your life are struggling. Together we can help prioritize our mental and physical health, allowing us all to live Brilliantly Resilient lives! Read Gabi's article on Deglamorizing the Lack of Self-Care in College Students and be sure to listen for these additional bits of Brilliance on this week's edition of the Brilliantly Resilient podcast! Fifty percent of college students report daytime sleepiness and 70% report not getting enough sleep. I felt like I couldn't share my feelings because it wasn't a “normal” conversation. If we make it an open conversation, how many people could this help? I chunked off my day. Morning is class, afternoon is work and at night I can do what I want. It helped me put aside my FOMO. Surrounding yourself with people with common goals and spending time by yourself is so important. Let's be Brilliantly Resilient together! XO, Kristin & Mary Fran

I just wanted to say that I really needed to hear this today. I'm going through something and I really needed to hear that I can do it. Thank you. ~ Attendee from Soroptimist “Dream It, Be It” Conference for Girls  It's not easy to be a young person today. Conflict is the norm, uncertainty is the future, and Covid has wreaked havoc on every aspect of life, particularly affecting young people, for the past three years. The U.S. Surgeon General has warned of a crippling mental health crisis affecting our youth. Enter Soroptimist International, a volunteer group founded in 1921 with clubs in 121 countries that is dedicated to the advancement of women and girls. Each year, Soroptimist International hosts the Dream It, Be It, conference, where young women of high school age are offered sessions to learn about career options, career skills and planning, time management, resilience strategies, and more.  Nancy Staich, a Soroptimist volunteer, notes that it's important that young women know it's okay to reinvent themselves as life changes. Evolution is natural and it's never too late to take a new path and recreate yourself. Nancy adds that the need for resilience is never ending, and building a supportive tribe is equally essential for a young woman's current and future success. We were blessed to be able to share Brilliantly Resilient with this amazing group of young women and provide tips to Reset with Resilience, Rise and Reveal their Brilliance. The quote above was from a young lady who came to us immediately after our presentation to affirm that it's important to remind our young people of their strengths and continue to provide them with tools and mentors to grow towards success. We all have a responsibility to equip our youth with the tools and strategies needed for success. Get involved and make a difference. Tune into this episode of the Brilliantly Resilient podcast to learn more, and be sure to look out for these additional bits of brilliance: We want girls to think about what they want. What am I really passionate about? What do I care about? We want girls to remember that they're bringing their entire selves to work. They have to see themselves as whole people. It's okay to recreate yourself when you need to recreate yourself. It's never too late. We want the girls to build a tribe and talk to people who can help them learn and grow. There are mentors out there who want to help. Learn more about Soroptimist International of Indian Rock at: www.investindreams.org Let's be Brilliantly Resilient together! Mary Fran & Kristin

  Don't operate from a fear mindset, operate from a growth mindset. Look at life from a Brilliantly Resilient lens. ~ Kristin Smedley and Mary Fran Bontempo Happy birthday to us!!! We can't believe it, but this week–March 7th–marks the 3rd birthday of Brilliantly Resilient! When we started Brilliantly Resilient, we planned a “world tour” of speaking on stages, sharing our process to Reset, Rise and Reveal Your Brilliance to the world. We prepared, we created, we dreamed and then, on March 7th, we had our first Brilliantly Resilient live event! It was amazing!! We couldn't have asked for more and we were so excited for the future of Brilliantly Resilient. Then, on March 14th, 2020, the entire world shut down. And so did all of our plans. Given what we preach, you'd think we immediately started to Reset with Resilience. Instead, we cried, we complained, we shook our fists at the heavens…and then we got over ourselves. We realized that we couldn't control anything that was happening in the world, but we could control our response. So, we decided to practice what we were preaching and started to look for ways to share Brilliantly Resilient–when we couldn't leave home. Fast forward three incredible years, and we have a top-rated podcast, a book, we've traveled around the country, both in person and virtually–all to share the Brilliantly Resilient program with thousands of others. As we often say, we are our own best case study, and have implemented each step of the Brilliantly Resilient process over and over again–proving that it works. We work the Brilliantly Resilient steps every day, and we've moved from a fear mindset to a growth mindset. Simply put, that means that instead of crashing and burning with challenges, we acknowledge them, make values-based decisions, check our perspective and see what's in our control. We can then take imperfect action (we've learned that nothing is perfect, and that's okay) and evolve with what happens next. Sharing Brilliantly Resilient has been a joyous opportunity, and we're incredibly grateful for those of you who have learned, laughed and discovered your resilience and brilliance with us. Thank you is not enough, but a heartfelt thanks to you all for your support. We're just getting started! Tune into this week's podcast to hear more (from us!), and be sure to listen for these additional bits of brilliance: When everything is taken away, you get to go back to your basic values, figure out what's important, and make decisions based on that. You can create a process for managing things. I look at life through a Brilliantly Resilient lens now, not as a victim or in anger. Now I know how I'm going to show up when a sucker punch comes along.  You can bring your transferable skills to every experience. Figure out what your Brilliant skill set is and bring that to every experience and see what happens. Then find others with complementary skill sets to add to your tribe. Kids don't look at failure as failure. They look at it as a learning opportunity.  Let's be Brilliantly Resilient together! Kristin and Mary Fran  

I had a very successful fitness business, but I had to get away from the toxic expectations of the fitness industry. I couldn't sell six pack ab products anymore. I had to shut it down. ~ Katie Bramlett Have you ever had something that's supposed to be good for you end up feeling bad for you? Many of us feel that way about exercise. We know it's good for us, but it doesn't always feel that way.  Katie Bramlett, this week's guest on the Brilliantly Resilient podcast is a fitness guru. But even Katie knew, despite having great success in the fitness industry, that the traditional view of exercise and fitness had become toxic.  Realizing that the key to fitness was more about intentional movement connected to self-care than endless crunches, squats and striving for unattainable physiques, Katie closed down her businesses and started WeShape–intending to build a community focused on a shift away from a number on the scale. By focusing on movement as a self-care practice and adjustable programs to help all users achieve success, Katie built a company based on shared values and gratitude for what any body is capable of doing. When we live a values-based life, we often find that our work and personal lives reach out to each other, allowing us to be true to what we believe and to find ways to incorporate those beliefs into our actions. To hear more from Katie, tune into this episode of the Brilliantly Resilient podcast and be sure to listen for these additional bits of brilliance: The idea of fitting in jeans will not be a sustainable reason to keep up with an exercise program. I hated exercise because I was doing it for the wrong reasons.  It has to be an act of self-care. If we focus on a number on the scale, even if we get to that number, it's fake fulfillment. It's external fulfillment. We can't have a belief that our worth comes from a number on a scale. We have to understand that with 8 billion people in the world, we all can't have the same body type. Feel gratitude for what your body can do. I had to fight my own mindset of “I'm not an expert.” I just knew this was so important, so I did it despite the internal and external negativity against making fitness about connecting to the self. WeShape is based on a meaningful shift away from the number on the scale to movement and connection with self and community. Our program is based on movement we can scale up or down depending on what the user needs. ~ Katie Bramlett Let's be Brilliantly Resilient together! Mary Fran & Kristin  

Alternative pathways to learning and education are really the key to educating today's students. So, how are we interconnected to businesses? How are we connected to the community? Everyone has that buy-in. How can we get businesses and the community and non-profits involved? ~Carlos Aponte Do you remember what you learned in Geometry class? Philosophy? Chemistry? Much of what we learned as students was intended to offer a well-rounded education, gearing us towards college–where we often took classes that were equally forgettable. (A course in James Joyce for English? Mary Fran had a headache for a solid month!)  Carlos Aponte taught in the Philadelphia school system for over ten years. Having lived through childhood trauma, Carlos recognized that many of his students were also struggling with serious challenges, and the educational system was not meeting their needs. Further, the path for students not headed for college often seemed like a dead-end. Knowing there was a better way, Carlos created the non-profit We Love Philly, a program that allows students to earn high school credits while learning how to practice self-care, engage with their community, create their own personal brand, and apprentice at area businesses.  Carlos recognizes the value in educating the whole student, and knows that encouraging the individual, as well as area businesses and organizations, to engage and support each other allows young people to feel a sense of worth and belonging that carries into adulthood.  Here at Brilliantly Resilient, we believe in building powerful tribes based on complementary skills sets so that everyone brings their best selves to every challenge. And living based on values with an emphasis on self-care helps our young people recognize their own power and worth, helping them to find their place in the world–both big and small. Tune into this week's episode to hear more from Carlos and listen for these additional bits of brilliance: You can't have an ounce of judgment in your bones when you're working with young people. You have to get through the trust / mistrust stage before you can reach kids. Once your body, mind and soul are aligned, you can do anything. There is a major disconnect between administration, teachers and students with the diverse learning styles and proficiencies in those groups. The brains are different and learn differently.  Let's be Brilliantly Resilient together!  Mary Fran & Kristin  

Emotions are indicators. If we see the red on a battery, we don't shame our computers. We see it as something we have to take care of for optimal performance. Imagine if we gave these human vessels…that same grace to say my emotions are indicators, not inconveniences. They let us know that if you want me to operate optimally, you need to acknowledge that I feel this….We need to ask ourselves, “What do I need in order to be well?” ~ Shannon Cohen How often have you warned yourself to control your emotions? Though we are inherently emotional beings, people often see emotions as detrimental–at least to success.  Shannon Cohen, speaker, author and business owner, encourages “using a head+heart approach” to success, productivity and everyday life. She reminds us that emotions are indicators of our overall health–not to be ignored. Given life's everyday challenges, and especially the difficulties of the last several years, it's easy to see how our emotions could get the better of us. Yet, if we recognize our emotions as a tool to determine what we need, both physically and mentally, we can better define what is in our control and come up with an action step–a Brilliantly Resilient strategy for sure. Tune into this episode of the Brilliantly Resilient podcast to hear more of Shannon's wisdom and check out her book, It's Normal to Shake as You Soar. Be sure to listen for these additional bits of Brilliance: Turbulence is part of the process of take-off and greatness. Building is messy. We need to find the wisdom and the gratitude in the messiness.  When we ask people “How are you?” it's a battery check. It's an indicator check. The next question we need to ask ourselves is “What do I need in order to be well,” because often the problem and the solution lie within the same place. Disengagement has always been one of the biggest corporate challenges. Covid took the lid off this and we could no longer be the manicured culture we were. We were glamorizing going back when “back” wasn't so great. Let's be Brilliantly Resilient together! Mary Fran & Kristin

When we're betrayed, our self-trust is totally shattered. There is a breakdown of body, mind & worldview. We need to regain and relearn our trust in ourselves. Our gut is so much more perceptive than our mind. ~ Dr. Debi Silber Have you ever been betrayed? Betrayal sounds like a soap-opera word–too dramatic to apply to everyday life. Yet, almost everyone has experienced betrayal at some point, either as an adult through trauma like divorce, or as a youth, when a best friend suddenly decides you aren't “cool” enough anymore and moves on without you. Think about a hurt that still hurts, even though it may have happened years ago. That's betrayal. Dr. Debi Silber, holistic psychologist and author of Trust Again, knows betrayal firsthand. More importantly, she knows how to guide those traumatized by betrayal through the 5 stages of healing where we again become healthy, whole, and are back on solid ground. Here at Brilliantly Resilient, we've experienced betrayal, and it hurts. It's also easy to get stuck in betrayal, making it a story that defines us instead of learning and choosing to move on.  Dr. Silber reminds us that rebuilding after betrayal is indeed a choice. As we say in Brilliantly Resilient terms, “Are you just visiting your crisis, or are you going to live there?”   In this episode of the Brilliantly Resilient podcast, Dr. Silber not only defines betrayal, but walks us through the 5 stages of healing to help us move towards “healing, rebirth, and a new worldview.” (Tune in at the 18:38 minute mark to hear about the 5 stages.) Tune in for more from Dr. Silber in this episode of the Brilliantly Resilient podcast, and be sure to listen for these additional Brilliance Bits: Betrayal lends itself to creating a new identity. Rebuilding is a choice. Hope is not a strategy. There's a collection of symptoms (physical/mental/emotional) so common to betrayal it's known as Post Betrayal Syndrome. Betrayal is a very different type of trauma. It feels personal. Let's be Brilliantly Resilient together! MFB & KS

It's about doing it. It's not about anything else. It's not about the goal. Pick a goal that you will never achieve but start putting into place each step and focus on the ladder rungs. One action at a time. ~ Jeremy Grater “This is the year.”  How many times have you told yourself (especially at the start of a new year), that this would be the year you would…lose weight, get a new job, start your own business, write that book….? The list goes on, as does the number of times we make promises to ourselves and fail. When we believe something will benefit us, why do we fail continually, making us feel even worse about not achieving those ever-elusive goals?  Jeremy Grater, joining Brilliantly Resilient as one half of the dynamic duo hosting The Fit Mess podcast along with partner Zach Tucker, knows a bit about not achieving goals. Beginning their podcast journey as two guys who talked beer and jokes, Jeremy and Zach soon realized that something was missing, and it began with their health. Both were determined not to just talk about fitness, but to achieve it, and as Jeremy tells it, that required two things: curiosity and action. And as far as goals, Jeremy has some interesting advice–set impossible goals and focus on one ladder rung at a time. Here at Brilliantly Resilient, we know that goals can be helpful–and exhausting. Breaking them down into micro-actions that we eventually won't resist is a brilliant way to make progress. Tune in to hear more from Jeremy and be sure to listen for these additional bits of Brilliance Start with curiosity. Why do you want to make this change? You can't say “This is the year,” because it's not. Change has to start with small steps. Do that one thing every day until it becomes a habit. Take the smallest incremental steps until it becomes the thing you don't have to fight against What can I do to prepare for who I want to become and the way I want to live? If you sit around waiting for the perfect moment, the opportunity is going to pass.   Let's be Brilliantly Resilient together! Kristin & Mary Fran

“I really think that none of us has to be as scared of ourselves as we are. We don't have to be worried that we're going to turn into monsters.” ~ Ashleigh Renard Are you married or in a long-term relationship? Have you ever thought about what life would be like if you weren't in that relationship? If we're honest, most of us have had moments where we fantasize about being free of obligations–and sometimes, that even means a marriage. But rather than examine why we're feeling that way, we shame ourselves into acting like everything is okay, even when it isn't. Ashleigh Renard, this week's guest on the Brilliantly Resilient podcast, notes that feeling like something is missing doesn't make us awful people. In fact, we're obligated to pause and consider what we want, what's working and what isn't–for everyone's sake. When we're honest, we can fix things, not just so they're better, but great. Through her book Swing and her Keeping It Hot viral video series, Ashleigh offers tips and strategies about how to stay connected, renegotiate marriage and most importantly, keep monogamy hot! (Whhaaattt???!!!)  Hilarious and heartfelt, Ashleigh is full of wit and wisdom and urges us to ditch the martyr-mom (twin sister of the supermom), and pay attention to ourselves. (She took her first step to personally do so by promising to heed her body and go to the bathroom when she needed to. Any other women out there holding it until you're ready to burst because someone needs something from you? Raise your hands, ladies!) Hear more from Ashleigh on this week's episode of the Brilliantly Resilient podcast and be sure to listen for these additional bits of Brilliance: We take action on autopilot because we don't have to make decisions. It feels safer; you don't want to rock the boat. So often we push away from each other because we are pushing away from ourselves. Have radical compassion for yourself. Maybe there is no bad guy here. The only way to move is to be on your path and say, ‘I'd like you to join me.' But we can't go back and try to pull them along. So often we push away from each other because we are pushing away from ourselves. Ashleigh Renard (https://ashleighrenard.com/) Let's be Brilliantly Resilient together! Kristin and Mary Fran

There's a perception about what nurses do and there's what nurses actually do. Nursing needs to start talking about itself. Every healthcare consumer should understand what nurses do. Visibility is key. ~Donald Bucher Do you feel safe and respected while doing your job? Most of us would say, “Of course.” While we might not have the perfect working environment, we don't go to work with the expectation that we might be abused verbally or physically on any given day. Not so with nurses. One study noted that almost 90% of nurses reported experiencing some type of abuse at work–mostly at the hands of patients or their families.  It was only a few short years ago that we greeted health care workers with applause, celebration and gratitude. Yet, even then, the politicization of Covid left many nurses on the receiving end of anger and frustration, and nurses still bear the brunt of patient dissatisfaction and fear today. Donald Bucher, a registered Nurse Practitioner and this week's guest on the Brilliantly Resilient podcast, is an advocate for those in the nursing profession. Upbeat, positive and empathetic, Don still recognizes the need for the public to know just how hard nurses really work, and he wants the nursing community to speak up both to educate others and protect themselves. Respect for others, as well as ourselves, is at the core of a civilized society. Everyone has the right to expect civility, especially while doing a life-saving job. Here at Brilliantly Resilient, respect is a core principle in how we treat each other, regardless of any differences we may encounter.  Tune in to this week's episode to hear more from Don and be sure to listen for these additional bits of Brilliance: The nurses are the ones standing there for 12 hours a day picking up on things with patients that help save your loved one. It's a difficult time to be in healthcare. Nurses love what we do, but it's hard. You're asked to do much more with less time. It's hard. We have to remember that when you're interacting with a family, they're having the worst day of their lives. But nurses still need to feel respected and safe. The voices (of nurses) needed to be louder during Covid. I challenge nurses to join their organizations to make that voice louder. ~ Donald Bucher (https://www.pacnp.org/) Let's be Brilliantly Resilient together! Kristin and Mary Fran

I needed to understand why this happened to me and think about what was next. Life is all about what you do on the second climb  ~ Jeffrey Abramowitz Have you ever made a mistake? One that changed your life, and not for the better? We all make mistakes, but usually, we do so without ill intent. Mistakes, by their nature, aren't intentional. We don't mean to screw up. That's why Jeffrey Abramowitz, this week's guest on the Brilliantly Resilient podcast, makes a distinction. Having spent five years in prison for a financial crime, Jeffrey notes that he made a choice that led to consequences. Consequences that changed his life forever. Jeffrey learned much while serving his sentence, and it brought him to his true purpose, to advocate for justice and education for those reentering society after incarceration. Jeffrey learned that two things are essential to successfully rebuild a life--responsibility and education. Once Jeffrey accepted his responsibility for his own actions, he dedicated himself to a life helping others, teaching inmates while serving his sentence and advocating for education to prepare inmates to re-enter society and build a life. Jeffrey encourages others to look forward and gives them the skills to do just that. By acknowledging our responsibility for our choices, we empower ourselves to move forward. Tune in to hear more about Jeffrey's mission and listen for these additional bits of brilliance: "I don't think any of us should spend time looking in the rear-view mirror. We can learn lessons, but we need to look forward." "It took me to really lose everything before I learned the lessons I needed to learn. But then I could define what the next chapter of my life could be." "We have to bring humanity back into our system, but the self-responsibility piece is the first thing you have to accept. I opened a door and I needed to accept everything that happened after that." "It's simple if you take just one little step. Turn the chair around." (Listen for this super-cool story!) ~ Jeffrey Abramowitz (https://www.jeffrey-abramowitz.com/) Let's be Brilliantly resilient together! KS & MFB

Your home is a tool. If your home is cluttered, it's not working for you. De-cluttering is not about being perfect. It's about making your house work for you as an asset to make room for happiness. ~ Tracy McCubbin We're just a few days into 2023, and if you're like us here at Brilliantly Resilient, your brain is already racing with goals and to-do's for the coming year. Like most people, we're raring to go and looking forward to crushing it in the New Year. But first, it's time to put away all of the lovely holiday decor that bejeweled our homes for the last five or six weeks. Funny, though, how those things that sparkled a short while ago now make rooms seem tired, dusty, and cluttered. Our friend Tracy McCubbin is the perfect person to help us begin 2023 by decluttering our homes and mindsets with some fundamental ideas and actions aimed at making our surroundings work for us, not against us. As Tracy advises, when we think of our homes as a tool meant to help us, it allows us to more clearly see what's working and what isn't–and what can be loaded into the donate or discard pile. So much that we hold on to no longer serves us. When we make room for more in our lives by decluttering, the space becomes mental as well as physical, and change becomes exponential. Tune into this week's episode of the Brilliantly Resilient podcast to hear more of Tracy's wisdom and be sure to check out her new book, Make Space for Happiness: How to Stop Attracting Clutter and Start Magnetizing the Life You Want . Wishing you all good things in 2023. Let's be Brilliantly Resilient together! XO, KS & MFB

Just a few more days to go before we welcome in the New Year! Who's ready to see 2022 hit the road?? The last few years certainly haven't been easy. And there's a great temptation to feel little enthusiasm for what's to come. BUT, throwing yourself a big, 'ol pity party doesn't provide much satisfaction--at least not long term.  So here it is, our most listened to episode from 2022, and it features our friend, Keith Baldwin. If there were ever an example of how to live a Brilliantly Resilient life in the midst of a giant pile of poo, Keith provides it. And although Keith loves a good party, his best advice involves putting the breaks on one. Read on to hear more from Keith and listen to how he managed a major sucker punch BRILLIANTLY!!! Thanks to Keith and all of our Brilliantly Resilient guests for sharing their wisdom, humor and humanity with us in 2022. We are beyond grateful. And thanks to all of you who listen to learn how to live a Brilliantly Resilient life--we're still learning right along with all of you! Happy New Year to all and here's to a fabulous 2023!!! Limit your Pity Party. I threw a hell of a Pity Party, but those emotions don't help you with solutions or move you forward. ~ Keith Baldwin Have you ever thrown yourself a Pity Party? Here at Brilliantly Resilient, we were experts at it. When life hits you with a sucker punch, it seems like you're entitled to feel sorry for yourself. And you are–to a point. But you can't live in that place of pain. Acknowledge it, feel it, and then get the heck out of there! This week's guest, Keith Baldwin decided to make 2020 a year of firsts and wrote a book (A Leap Year of Firsts) about his experiences. But what started out as fun and games quickly turned serious when the pandemic produced some unwanted firsts–as when Keith had to lay off his entire workforce.  After realizing that feeling sorry for himself wasn't helping him or his staff, Keith got to work, finding a unique solution to his problem and hiring all 45 workers back within hours of laying them off. Remember, sometimes life just sucks. The question is, are you just visiting that place of yuck or are you going to live there? Tune in to this week's episode of the Brilliantly Resilient podcast to hear more about Keith Baldwin and his Leap Year of Firsts! XO, KS & MFB