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In this episode of The Thick Pod with Michelle and Kelsey, we kick things off with our usual kid chaos stories and unfiltered banter while literally FaceTiming —but then we go deep. We're talking about comparison: how it creeps in, how it messes with your joy, and why even the most secure person can feel shaken in this industry. From brand deals to view counts, social media has a way of turning everything into a scoreboard—and we're over it. We share our honest experiences navigating those messy emotions, how competition between women can get complicated, and why our friendship is the anchor that keeps us grounded. If you've ever looked at someone else and questioned your own worth, this one's for you. You're doing better than you think. Let's talk about it.
What did you catch someone doing while they were driving? This morning we found out that Joe was caught in some road rage and had found out this person holding him up in traffic was FaceTiming while driving. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
What did you catch someone doing while they were driving? This morning we found out that Joe was caught in some road rage and had found out this person holding him up in traffic was FaceTiming while driving.
In this episode, J&J debate whether FaceTiming your mom every night on a romantic weekend is sweet or a total ick. A listener writes in about her boyfriend buying Sydney Sweeney's bath water soap, and the hosts weigh in on whether that's quirky or cringe. They dig into whether dating an anonymous internet troll is ever okay (spoiler: nope). Jordana's pool is open, so they break down the unspoken rules of hosting outside vs. inside in the summer. Plus, someone in an ENM (ethically non-monogamous) relationship gets ghosted before the first date, and Jared reminds us that nothing counts until you're actually face-to-face. Watch episode here
Nick and Courtney first matched on Tinder two weeks ago and according to Nick immediately hit it off. Nick tells us that they spent multiple nights FaceTiming one another and actually went on their first date last weekend. Nick tells us that they got dinner with one another and the thing he liked the most was that it felt his conversation with Courtney was as if they had known each other for a while. However, ever since their dinner date Nick has noticed that Courtney isn't really responding to him. We call Courtney trying to figure out if there is anything else between her and Nick that happened that may have caused things to go wrong and she tells us that she wasn't a fan of Nick's best female friend. Find out what's really going on in this Second Date Update!
Episode 10: Caves How does CGI help the cave sets? Where does the Klingon High Council have their meetings in each era? How did L'Rell get such an amazing house? How many scenes are FaceTiming half in the cave? How have the Talosian and Trill caves changed? Join Ashlyn and Rhianna as we jump into Discovery Caves! This is the tenth episode of the Caves series, where Ashlyn and Rhianna talk about the caves episode in every Star Trek show, discussing every Star Trek series. SPOILER WARNING: Discovery Next time, we'll get stuck in the Lower Decks Caves! DISCLAIMER: We do not own any of the rights to Star Trek or its affiliations. This content is for review only. Our intro and outro is by Jerry Goldsmith. Rule of Acquisition Rule #16: “A deal is a deal.” Please check out our Patreon and donate any $1, $6, $10, or $20 per month to access exclusive episodes of trivia, documentary review, and reviews of every episode of The Animated Series, Lower Decks and the Short Treks. Head to https://www.patreon.com/thedurassisterspodcast for all this and more!
Topics: meeting at the GGE live show, a Cameo from Craig about not believing in pandas, why he's never writing a book again but go buy Salt Hank: A Five Napkin Situation, why he goes by "Hank", how he started making food videos at the University of Colorado Boulder, his first viral video of a lamb burger, his restaurant Salt Hank's on Bleecker Street is opening May 31, 2025, Hank FaceTimes Benny Blanco, who he's been starstruck over, his death row meal, a surprising food he hatesSponsors:Quince:Go to Quince.com/taylor for free shipping on your order and three hundred and sixty-five-day returnsArya: Visit arya.fyi and use code TAYLOR for 15% off todayFay: Listeners of Taste of Taylor can qualify to see a registered dietitian for as little as $0 by visiting faynutrition.com/taylorProduced by Dear Media.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
Liverpool's Premier League title win, the race to make the Champions League spots, Trent's next adventure and Harry Kane's first trophy - lots for Kyle and Browny to get stuck into in the latest pod.Kyle reveals what happened when Vinny Kompany facetimed him after winning the Bundesliga and gives flowers to Liverpool for getting the Premier League title done.He also talks about his upcoming Coppa Italia Final against Bologna and why victory would mean so much, gives his thoughts on Trent Alexander-Arnold's decision to leave Liverpool and picks who will make the Champions League spots from England this season.He also reveals why his recovery from an elbow injury was tougher than other injury setbacks suffered during his career.Don't forget to check out Kyle and Browny's Q&A episodes, exclusively on BBC Sounds. In the latest episode, they discuss whether Kyle really believes he could have taken Thierry Henry is a foot race and there's a question from actor and comedian Matt Lucas.Listen here: https://www.bbc.co.uk/sounds/play/p0l7vnx9If you want to ask Kyle and Browny a question about themselves, about something to do with football or something completely random, email kylewalker@bbc.co.uk.
Send us a textYouth Ministry.. it ain't what it used to be! The digital revolution has transformed youth ministry into uncharted territory, creating what seasoned experts are calling "a perfect storm" of challenges for today's teenagers. At the heart of this storm lies the smartphone – a device that has fundamentally altered how adolescents experience relationships, rest, and reality itself."The culture is catechizing our kids 24-7 through these devices," -Walt MuellerSpecial Guest Alert: Walt Mueller of CPYUThere is some reason to raise alarms: trends like teens sleeping with phones, FaceTiming until they pass out, and even gambling online during school lunch periods. This constant digital immersion directly contributes to the sleep deprivation fueling unprecedented anxiety levels among young people. Medical experts emphasize that teenagers need approximately nine hours of uninterrupted sleep for healthy development, yet notifications and digital dependencies make this virtually impossible for many.In the wake of Jonathan Haidt's must-read book "The Anxious Generation" Zac and Walt discuss how parents increasingly use their children as "status objects" for social media validation, creating crushing pressure that transforms ordinary activities into high-stakes performance arenas. Youth workers must respond with a threefold approach: prophetic influence (speaking God's truth to cultural realities), preventive influence (building appropriate guardrails), and redemptive influence (offering grace when mistakes inevitably occur). Rather than merely aiming for behavioral compliance, effective youth ministry nurtures heart transformation through balanced spiritual formation.Today's youth ministry leaders function as cross-cultural missionaries who must be deeply grounded in Scripture while simultaneously understanding the complex digital landscape teens navigate. By creating spaces where adolescents can experience genuine community, rest, and spiritual formation apart from screens, youth ministry offers what many teenagers desperately need but rarely experience elsewhere. Subscribe to the podcast to hear more conversations with ministry leaders who are reimagining how we disciple the next generation in an age of digital distraction and spiritual hunger.Support the showJoin the community!
TJ is upset she's not being included in all the fun FaceTiming and Pidge is spending a lot of money! Money that he doesn't have. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoicesSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
TJ is upset she's not being included in all the fun FaceTiming and Pidge is spending a lot of money! Money that he doesn't have. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
It has probably happened to you before.You and a friend are talking—not texting, not DMing, not FaceTiming—but talking, physically face-to-face, about, say, an upcoming vacation, a new music festival, or a job offer you just got.And then, that same week, you start noticing some eerily specific ads. There's the Instagram ad about carry-on luggage, the TikTok ad about earplugs, and the countless ads you encounter simply scrolling through the internet about laptop bags.And so you think, “Is my phone listening to me?”This question has been around for years and, today, it's far from a conspiracy theory. Modern smartphones can and do listen to users for voice searches, smart assistant integration, and, obviously, phone calls. It's not too outlandish to believe, then, that the microphones on smartphones could be used to listen to other conversations without users knowing about it.Recent news stories don't help, either.In January, Apple agreed to pay $95 million to settle a lawsuit alleging that the company had eavesdropped on users' conversations through its smart assistant Siri, and that it shared the recorded conversations with marketers for ad targeting. The lead plaintiff in the case specifically claimed that she and her daughter were recorded without their consent, which resulted in them receiving multiple ads for Air Jordans.In agreeing to pay the settlement, though, Apple denied any wrongdoing, with a spokesperson telling the BBC:“Siri data has never been used to build marketing profiles and it has never been sold to anyone for any purpose.”But statements like this have done little to ease public anxiety. Tech companies have been caught in multiple lies in the past, privacy invasions happen thousands of times a day, and ad targeting feels extreme entirely because it is.Where, then, does the truth lie?Today, on the Lock and Code podcast with David Ruiz, we speak with Electronic Frontier Foundation Staff Technologist Lena Cohen about the most mind-boggling forms of corporate surveillance—including an experimental ad-tracking technology that emitted ultrasonic sound waves—specific audience segments that marketing companies make when targeting people with ads, and, of course, whether our phones are really listening to us.“Companies are collecting so much information about us and in such covert ways that it really feels like they're listening to us.”Tune in today.You can also find us on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, and Google Podcasts, plus whatever preferred podcast platform you use.For all our cybersecurity coverage, visit Malwarebytes Labs at malwarebytes.com/blog.Show notes and credits:Intro Music: “Spellbound” by Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 Licensehttp://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/Outro Music: “Good God” by Wowa (unminus.com)Listen up—Malwarebytes doesn't just talk cybersecurity, we provide it.Protect yourself from online attacks that threaten your...
ON TODAY’S SHOW: Megan’s gone a little wild... Is this the ultimate parking hack? Did you ever achieve your childhood dream job? Jono’s concerned he’s looking suspicious… What do our coffee orders say about us? A Gen Z breakdown! Megan can’t say “regularly”... and it’s hilarious! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
The team is back together this week and have a lot to catch up on. The Super Bowl, the halftime performance, NFL free agency, MLB Spring Training, movie theater snacks, the Oscars, Facetiming celebs, CBB and the NBA...so much to cover and so little time. Enjoy! Basement Brewed Fantasy Football Promo Code: BRATSANDBEERS ($15 off your first year) Use the link and promo code above to sign up for the Basement Brewed Fantasy Football Pro Bowl Package for the 2025 NFL season! If you sign up before the Playoffs begin, you can join a Playoffs Fantasy League with the opportunity to win an autographed jersey...so join now! Brats & Beers Links
Louis sits down in the Spotify studio with Irish actor, writer, and director Sharon Horgan. Sharon discusses her colourful years squatting in London, the fine line between comedy and tragedy, and FaceTiming with Bono while filming Bad Sisters 2. She also spills the beans about almost starring in a Woody Allen film… Warnings: Strong language. Links/Attachments: TV Show: ‘Bad Sisters' (2022-2025) - AppleTV+ https://tv.apple.com/gb/show/bad-sisters/umc.cmc.14kr4vv65unannh7doqgvlh20 Film: Home Alone (1990) https://youtu.be/jEDaVHmw7r4?si=rfeHfnepM2T1YCCQ TV Show: ‘Catastrophe' (2015-2019) - Channel 4 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5sKQ6ilBGGE TV Show: ‘Pulling' (2006-2009) - BBC https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KgHKlCM-7Wk&t=4s TV Show: ‘Modern Love' (2019) - Amazon https://youtu.be/2zSuD79TU3w?si=opqU542-inqGMY_d&t=244 Short Film: The Week Before Christmas (2012) - Sky https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ueKfgCrFuek TV Show: ‘Divorce' (2016-2019) - HBO https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OGadA8rJBek TV Show: ‘The Larry Sanders Show' (1992-1998) - HBO https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jG1YlnrQAnM TV Show: ‘The Pilot Show' (2004) - Channel 4 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MueLNwbFWEU ‘Woody Allen warns against ‘witch hunt' post-Weinstein' - Variety https://variety.com/2017/film/news/woody-allen-harvey-weinstein-1202590319/ Film: Husbands and Wives (1992) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2daA2-OwXbE Film: Housewife of the Year (2024) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I0OGXGAHaWs TV Show: ‘Motherland' (2016-2022) https://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episodes/p05j1jkp/motherland TV Show: ‘Amandaland' (2025) https://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episodes/m0024pyy/amandaland Credits: Producer: Millie Chu Assistant Producer: Emilia Gill Production Manager: Francesca Bassett Music: Miguel D'Oliveira Audio Mixer: Tom Guest Video Mixer: Scott Edwards Shownotes compiled by Maisie Williams Executive Producer: Arron Fellows A Mindhouse Production for Spotify www.mindhouse.co.uk Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
Send us a textPost Valentine's Day we get back to talking about the trials and tribulations of online dating, bathroom etiquette on the first date, meeting the mom on first dates, Bob the Pilot and why FaceTiming before dating is a good idea Follow us at Reality Redemption on Facebook, Instagram, Threads, BlueSky and Tik Tok
Pretty soon, the Moon won't just be shining in the night sky—it'll be getting 4G! NASA and Nokia are teaming up to bring a mobile network to the lunar surface, making it easier for astronauts to communicate. Instead of using old-school radios, future moonwalkers will be able to send texts, make calls, and even stream data back to Earth. This 4G network will help with navigation, video streaming, and controlling lunar rovers in real-time. And who knows? Maybe one day, we'll be FaceTiming from the Moon! The future of space travel is looking more connected than ever.
Online dating got you scratching your head?
On today's episode, Nicole and Rich welcome a very special guest—Nicole's husband, Matt—for a deep dive into the oh-so-serious topic of edging. Rich shares the moment he walked into the iconic Superdome in New Orleans, where the Super Bowl is just around the corner. But being away from home isn't all glitz and game-day excitement—he gets real about the guilt of FaceTiming his kids at all the wrong times. Meanwhile, Nicole opens up about her daughter's tough experience with schoolyard bullying and the life lessons she knows she'll one day have to pass down to her son, Keegan, before heading out to have fun. And we have to ask—when the world is ending, are you fighting tooth and nail to survive, or are you throwing in the towel like Nicole? Have Kids, They Said... is a SiriusXM Network Podcast made by Nicole Ryan and Rich Davis.If you'd like to send us a message or ask a question email us at HKTSpod@gmail.comFollow on social media:Instagram @havekidstheysaidpodNicole @mashupnicoleRich @richdavisand @siriusxm
(00:00-47:00) Doug's cute little vest. Highway conspiracies. Hoosier Trojan Horses are tough to sniff out. FaceTiming with older women. Baby mama opt outs. Saad's release. Albert Pujols career earnings. Pujols as a big league manager. The electric bat flip in the Dominican League. Doug's a little lumberjack. Gen Z'ers in the work force. Talking discipline at home and at school. Sam is on the phone lines and he doesn't want Emily the Tri Delt teaching kids. (47:09-1:01:18) John Morosi audio on MLB Network talking Nolan Arenado and the increasing likelihood he's in Jupiter next month. In terms of doing nothing, they've done a lot. The Athletic reporting the Cubs are in on Alex Bregman. (1:01:28-1:19:35) Bernie Federko joins the program to talk about the busy last three days for the Blues. The Brandon Saad situation. Younger players needing to come up with better efforts. Effort is there but the execution is lacking. What's going on with Buchnevich? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoicesSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
(00:00-47:00) Doug's cute little vest. Highway conspiracies. Hoosier Trojan Horses are tough to sniff out. FaceTiming with older women. Baby mama opt outs. Saad's release. Albert Pujols career earnings. Pujols as a big league manager. The electric bat flip in the Dominican League. Doug's a little lumberjack. Gen Z'ers in the work force. Talking discipline at home and at school. Sam is on the phone lines and he doesn't want Emily the Tri Delt teaching kids. (47:09-1:01:18) John Morosi audio on MLB Network talking Nolan Arenado and the increasing likelihood he's in Jupiter next month. In terms of doing nothing, they've done a lot. The Athletic reporting the Cubs are in on Alex Bregman. (1:01:28-1:19:35) Bernie Federko joins the program to talk about the busy last three days for the Blues. The Brandon Saad situation. Younger players needing to come up with better efforts. Effort is there but the execution is lacking. What's going on with Buchnevich? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
Deontray Flanagan will spend the rest of his life in prison for the brutal murder of his daughter, Zevaya, in March 2023. Flanagan led law enforcement on a high speed chase and hit Zevaya in the head and strangled her while on FaceTime call with her mother. Law&Crime's Angenette Levy looks at the disturbing case in this episode of Crime Fix — a daily show covering the biggest stories in crime.Host:Angenette Levy https://twitter.com/Angenette5Guest:Bridgette Williams https://www.instagram.com/lawyerbridgette/CRIME FIX PRODUCTION:Head of Social Media, YouTube - Bobby SzokeSocial Media Management - Vanessa BeinVideo Editing - Daniel CamachoGuest Booking - Alyssa Fisher & Diane KayeSTAY UP-TO-DATE WITH THE LAW&CRIME NETWORK:Watch Law&Crime Network on YouTubeTV: https://bit.ly/3td2e3yWhere To Watch Law&Crime Network: https://bit.ly/3akxLK5Sign Up For Law&Crime's Daily Newsletter: https://bit.ly/LawandCrimeNewsletterRead Fascinating Articles From Law&Crime Network: https://bit.ly/3td2IqoLAW&CRIME NETWORK SOCIAL MEDIA:Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/lawandcrime/Twitter: https://twitter.com/LawCrimeNetworkFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/lawandcrimeTwitch: https://www.twitch.tv/lawandcrimenetworkSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
SPONSORS: Don't miss out on all the action this week at DraftKings! Download the DraftKings app today! Sign-up using https://dkng.co/bears or through my promo code BEARS. Try VIIA! https://viia.co/BEARS and use code BEARS! Visit http://BlueChew.com to receive your first month FREE! Download the CFO's Guide to AI and Machine Learning at https://NetSuite.com/BEARS. WHAT'S Errybody?! Welcome back to 2 Bears, 1 Cave! This week, Tom Segura and Bort Kreysher are joined by Ari Shaffir! The trio talk about Shaq's habit of Facetiming on the toilet, before deep diving into the drama surrounding Brianna Chickenfry and Zach Bryan. Forgiving and forgetting is impossible for some people to do, ya know? The three guys next get into Ari's new special and return to Netflix, which gets interrupted by Bert going on a tangent about beefing with Black Twitter. They also discuss Protect Our Parks, making Joe Rogan proud, compliments from black people, Bert's bench bet, insurance being a total scam, serial killer fantasies, alternative news, and weirdo evil dudes like Diddy and Jared the Subway Guy. Enjoy! 2 Bears, 1 Cave Ep. 270 https://tomsegura.com/tour https://www.bertbertbert.com/tour https://store.ymhstudios.com GAMBLING PROBLEM? CALL 1-800-GAMBLER, (800) 327-5050 or visit http://gamblinghelplinema.org (MA). Call 877-8-HOPENY/text HOPENY (467369) (NY). Please Gamble Responsibly. 888-789-7777/visit http://ccpg.org (CT) or visit http://www.mdgamblinghelp.org (MD). 21+ and present in most states. (18+ DC/KY/NH/WY). Void in ONT/OR/NH. Eligibility restrictions apply. On behalf of Boot Hill Casino & Resort (KS). 1 per new customer. Min. $5 deposit. Min. $5 bet. Max. $200 issued as non-withdrawable Bonus Bets that expire in 7 days (168 hours). Stake removed from payout. Terms: http://dkng.co/dk-offer-terms. Ends 2/9/25 at 11:59 PM ET. Sponsored by DK. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Your Stupid Minds continues its tradition of low budget Christmas movies with wrestlers in them with Country Hearts Christmas, starring Chris Jericho and others. Tori (Lanie McAuley) and June (Katerina Maria) are sisters seeking to become country music stars in Nashville. This was most likely set up in the previous movie Country Hearts, but that doesn't involve Christmas so who cares? The sisters catch a big break and get a spot on a popular Christmas Eve live television show, but there's one massive problem. They need to go to church! The women hem and haw about having to be on TV on the day before Christmas, missing key family events like church and... opening pre-Santa presents? Bear in mind, these women are adults and can still make it on Christmas Day, but that isn't enough. Their dad Bones (Jericho) is a former rock star who has sobered up since his rock days. He spends his days Facetiming various family members to meddle in their personal affairs, traversing the cathedral-like hallways of his cavernous McMansion, and trying to get his horses to have sex with each other. June husband Justin (Jeff Irving) is lonely while his wife is in Nashville, drinking heavily, and having financial troubles. Why he can't run a failing winery in Nashville with his wife is beyond us. Meanwhile Tori has a love triangle (or square? Maybe a Love Sputnik, since all the lines need to connect back to her?) with three different dudes. We could go on about the plot forever, but I can assure you the first world travails of this extremely co-dependent family are just as boring on screen as written. There's also a product placement for Zillow so egregious it's basically a 30 second commercial in the middle of this movie. Enjoy!
Get up to 40% off at cozyearth.com/NOTFOREVERYONE. Use code NOTFOREVERYONE. And make sure to check out our SECOND ANNIVERSARY APPAREL LAUNCH at nfepodapparel.com. 10% off with code SCIENTIST through December 16, 2024. __ The boys are back in town! The kings to our kings (just go with it), Justin and Ryan, join Caroline and Jess to talk all about dating apps. Who better to discuss the apps than four people who met on them? The barbershop quartet discusses listener WHATADOs, like what photos to include on your profile, how to revive a dead conversation, tips for finding the balance between red flags and judgment, and FaceTiming or sending photos before you actually meet your match. Besides touching on falling for someone you'd never expect and a few dating/app dealbreakers, they also dissect what worked on their partner's profiles. The episode ends where their relationships began: talking about their first few dates and how they went from the app to the altar. (Just kidding…for now.) __ This episode was produced by our prince, Abi Newhouse. __ Share with a friend! Follow, rate, and review on your favorite podcasting app! Subscribe on YOUTUBE for full episode video: youtube.com/@Not4EveryonePod Plus follow us on INSTAGRAM for more: @not4everyonepod @thegoodsitter @jzdebakey And don't forget about our apparel: nfepodapparel.com __ Intro Music: “Doja Dance” by PALA __ DISCLAIMER: All opinions are our own. We are not therapists or health professionals, or professional of any kind, really. Please see your own professional or counselor for professional support. Do your research and be safe! --- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/not4everyonepod/support
Alabama's showing against Oklahoma was nothing short of a disaster. Today, we've got CNN's primetime anchor, and Alabama super fan, Kaitlan Collins, to help us sort through the wreckage, talks about how she is learning to cope with Alabama's losses, and tries to make sense of Kalen DeBoer's first season as Alabama's head coach. Collins also shares behind the scenes stories of Alabama's visits to the White House, her friendship with Charles Barkley and explains why she'll never visit Jordan-Hare Stadium again. Presented by Broadway Joe's Fantasy Sports Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Sherrone Moore joins us to talk about what the team has left to play for, recruiting in today's world of NIL, players FaceTiming coaches, and Senior Day against Northwestern
This is an hour long facetime (hehe) of us talking about how this year went for me and what is coming. A lot of lessons to take from this episode. Love you mouah
The Journey of Being a Dad Fatherhood is a journey filled with joy, challenges, and continuous growth. On the latest episode of the Dads with Daughters podcast, we sit down with Damien Moore, a dedicated father and founder of Dad's Daily Digest. Through their engaging conversation, Damien shares heartfelt experiences, invaluable insights, and practical advice for fathers striving to raise resilient and compassionate children. Preparing for the Unexpected The Impact of COVID-19 on Fatherhood Damien Moore's journey into fatherhood coincided with an unprecedented global event—the COVID-19 pandemic. His daughter was born just six weeks before the world shut down. As a budding freelance professional, Damien faced the harsh reality of job loss while also navigating the new terrain of fatherhood amidst a pandemic. The absence of his family in the crucial initial months underscored the emotional strain many new parents faced during this period. "There's no parenting tips or books that tell you how to parent during a pandemic," Damien states, highlighting the uncertainty that clouded the early days of his fatherhood journey. Despite these challenges, Damien found solace and support in technology, enabling constant communication with his family through virtual platforms. This adaptability and reliance on a support network became a cornerstone of his approach to parenting during these trying times. Addressing Mental Health: A Family Affair Understanding and Managing Anxiety Both Damien and his wife come from families with a history of mental health challenges, making them acutely aware of the importance of mental well-being. Recognizing early signs of anxiety in their daughter, they took proactive steps to understand and address her needs. From withholding toileting behaviors to being easily startled, these manifestations of anxiety required a sensitive and informed approach. "We adapt as parents based on our kids' personalities," shares Damien, emphasizing the need for a tailored parenting approach that considers individual differences. Damien's candidness about his own mental health struggles and his decision to seek therapy underline the importance of self-awareness and the willingness to seek help. By sharing these experiences, he sets a powerful example for other fathers, encouraging them to prioritize their mental health for the benefit of their families. Building a Supportive Community The Birth of Dad's Daily Digest Inspired by personal experiences and a desire to support other fathers, Damien launched Dad's Daily Digest—a platform aimed at providing advice, sharing stories, and fostering a supportive community among fathers. The alarming rise in suicide rates during the pandemic, particularly among men, motivated Damien to create a space where fathers could find solace, encouragement, and practical tips on navigating the complexities of parenthood. "If I just touch one person and inspire one individual... that's all that matters to me." Through this platform, Damien hopes to tackle the stigma around mental health and provide a lifeline to fathers who might be struggling in silence. His unwavering commitment to making a positive impact, even if it's one person at a time, speaks volumes about his dedication to this cause. Lessons in Empathy and Compassion A Beautiful Gesture In a touching anecdote shared on the podcast, Damien recounts a moment with his daughter that encapsulates the essence of the lessons he strives to impart. While at a McDonald's drive-thru, his daughter's simple yet profound act of kindness towards a homeless individual demonstrated the values of empathy and generosity that Damien and his wife instill in her. "Her gesture was just so beautiful… it nearly brought me to tears." These moments of heartfelt connection not only reinforce the principles Damien values but also highlight the significant impact that nurturing a compassionate environment can have on a child's development. Looking Towards the Future Hopes and Aspirations As Damien continues to build Dad's Daily Digest, his ultimate aspiration is to become a motivational speaker, sharing his journey and insights on a larger scale. By doing so, he hopes to inspire and support more fathers in their quest to raise strong, compassionate daughters while also navigating their own personal challenges. In concluding his conversation with Dr. Christopher Lewis, Damien leaves listeners with a powerful piece of advice: put life into perspective, recognize your blessings, and approach each day with gratitude. These principles not only shape his parenting philosophy but also serve as a guiding light for fathers everywhere striving to be the best they can be. This comprehensive blog post captures the essence of the podcast episode, featuring key anecdotes and insights shared by Damien Moore, ultimately providing valuable guidance and motivation for fathers navigating the beautiful yet challenging journey of parenthood. TRANSCRIPT (Unedited transcript created using CASTMAGIC) Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:00:05]: Welcome to Dads with Daughters. In this show, we spotlight dads, resources, and more to help you be the best dad you can be. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:00:16]: Welcome back to the Dance with Daughters podcast where we bring you guests to be active participants in your daughters' lives, raising them to be strong, independent women. Really excited to have you back again this week. And every week, I love being able to sit down, talk to you, work with you as you are trying to be the best dad that you wanna be. And as you are trying to raise your daughters into those strong independent women that all of us want for our kids. And I so appreciate that you come back every week to be able to learn, to grow, to be willing to hear the stories of others, and to be able to take those stories and be able to turn them into action. Because it is important. It's important to be able to be willing to listen and to learn and to know that none of us have all the answers. None of us are perfect ads, and nobody has the handbook in regard to what it means and what it takes to be the perfect dad. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:01:16]: There's lots of different ways to father, lots of different ways to be a dad. And you can learn along the way if you're open to it and you're willing to listen and learn from others. That's why this podcast exists. Every week, I bring you different people, different dads, different individuals with resources that can help you to be that dad that you wanna be. And today, we got another great guest with us. Damian Moore is with us. And Damien is a father and also is has has a resource out there called Dad's Daily Digest. So we're gonna be talking about both of those aspects, getting to know him a little bit more, and I'm really excited to have him here. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:01:53]: Damien, thanks so much for being here today. Damien Moore [00:01:54]: Thank you so much for having me. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:01:56]: Well, I'm really excited to have you here today. And I always start these episodes with an opportunity to turn the clock back in time. I'd love to go back. I know your daughter is 4 and a half, and I would love to go back and might be 4 and a half years, could be 5a half years. But I wanna go back to the very first moment that you found that you were going to be a dad to a daughter. What was going through your head? Damien Moore [00:02:18]: Yeah. So I was actually in the UK at the time. I found out the gender. My wife called me. I was visiting family. I'm originally from the UK and France, and I got the call. And it was just ecstatic. I mean, it's you know, I think as a guy, I I always thought, you know, I'd like to have a little boy. Damien Moore [00:02:35]: But I've always friends of mine who have actually many of my friends had daughters before me. And they, you know, told me just how precious it was and how special it was to have that kind of daddy daughter bond. So, I mean, I was absolutely ecstatic to find out that news. And, yeah, to this day, it's just the greatest feeling, and bond is so true, and I've just loved every minute so far. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:02:55]: Now I talked to a lot of dads, and and a lot of dads and daughters talk to me about the fact that walking into fatherhood can be scary in general, just being a father, because we don't know always what we're getting into. But being a father of a daughter sometimes brings its own fears. What would you say has been your biggest fear in raising a daughter? Damien Moore [00:03:14]: I think, as you say, I obviously t to raise a confident, independent girl, one that kind of can can take on the world in her own way. Take on the world in her own way. I don't wanna, you know, control her too much. I wanna her to understand that the world is is a fluid and flexible place that you can kind of embrace in many different ways. And I think being raised by a a very kind of strong mother, you know, she instilled kind of positivity in me every day and just to kind of really embrace the world ahead of us and challenges and and opportunities. And I think I just wanna give her that opportunity every day that life is a beautiful thing and it's embrace every day with kind of open arms. There will be challenges. There will be tough times, and it's how you best prepare them for those moments in life when they one day leave the nest. Damien Moore [00:03:56]: You know, we have a role as parents to be there for their whole lives until we die, but when they're here at home with us, when we're raising them, we have a responsibility to kind of, you know, keep them safe and make sure that they understand and and teach them in in a in a in a way that's not too I wouldn't say too controlling, but in a way that kind of allows them to understand the world up, you know, outside of the house and be best prepared as possible. Because life can be tough. You know? Life throws all sorts of challenges. And for me particularly, you know, I had my daughter 6 weeks before COVID closed down the world and went through a really personal tough time during that moment because my own family couldn't visit my daughter. Basically, 16 months. They didn't meet her until she was 16 months old, and as a new dad, particularly wanted to celebrate this moment. This was like something you dream of. You celebrate the birth of your first child with your parents, with your your siblings, and it was really tough. Damien Moore [00:04:44]: They they were 1 week away from coming to America, and then the borders closed, and it was kind of a there's no, like, parenting tips or books that tell you how to parent during a pandemic. It's like, that doesn't exist. So, you know, my wife and I kind of went through the motions of, like, wow, this is actually happening. The world's shutting down. We have a 6 week 6 week old daughter. I was actually freelancing at the time and lost my job as well. So it all happened at a very, very stressful moment, like and it was, like, gonna be this most beautiful thing ever, and it was. Like, you know, the first few weeks was, like, incredible. Damien Moore [00:05:14]: You know, we've got dogs at home. It's like the dogs are super happy to have this new baby at home, but then the world shut down, and we had to kind of really adjust and figure life out as new parents during a COVID pandemic. And I think those life learnings for me just reiterate how we can best prepare our kids for the unexpected and for, you know, just to be best prepared for the real world. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:05:34]: Definitely a challenging time, and COVID threw us all through a loop in many different ways. But being able to have a child right at the beginning and not being able to allow for your family and others to be able to interact. How did you have to pivot, especially losing a job, having a new child, just a couple of stressors in that situation during that pandemic? How did you pivot to be able to make the most of what you had, but also be able to move forward with being a father and moving into a new job and and other things as well. Damien Moore [00:06:12]: Yes. I mean, thankfully, even now during COVID and and now, my wife's family is very close to us. So thankfully, we had her support network. So we had her mom, her brothers, and other wider family members around us. So we had that support, which was very needed at the time. Now for me, personally, I I did struggle not having my mom, my dad available right next door. So we're blessed today to have great technology, so FaceTime was critical. You know, we did a lot of FaceTiming, and it's amazing how, you know, from just an early age, how much these children pick up and learn and they recognize faces. Damien Moore [00:06:45]: So the first time my daughter met my mom when she was 16 months old, she wasn't a complete stranger because she she did recognize her through the FaceTime interaction. So we're lucky today to have that type of technology to stay in touch with members of our family despite the distances. I mean, moving to America, I always knew, you know, building a life here and having a family here would always be different than what I was raised with because I was raised with family members very close to me in the UK. But I knew I was kind of giving, you know, distance between me and my family, so I always knew that my parents always have a different relationship with my daughter than my my brother's daughters who live in the UK. And I was okay with that because I know technology is great today to kind of stay in touch. I mean, from a professional standpoint, on the job side, it was a rough few months. I personally am very I'm kind of an extrovert. I love being around people. Damien Moore [00:07:30]: I love socializing. So COVID was tough on that side of my own kind of mental challenges. I I was obviously locked at home a lot, so I decided to actually become a waiter during that time. I done waiting very early on in my in my teens, but I decided to become a waiter to kinda get myself out of the house so I could put my mental being in a better place. So at home, I wasn't so stressed and anxious and cooped up in the house. Being a waiter allowed me to get out of the house, socialize with people, it just gave me a better, like, headspace for myself. So I did that for about 8 months. As well as, obviously, it provided some sort of revenue for the family. Damien Moore [00:08:03]: Not not obviously huge, but it gave me something to kind of keep going. So, I mean, that's how I pivoted during those times. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:08:09]: You went through some challenging times at the very beginning. You moved into where you are today. Throughout your time in raising your daughter. It's not always going to be positive moments or easy moments. There's definitely challenges along the way. What's been the hardest part in being a father to a daughter? Damien Moore [00:08:27]: So I think it's adapting to their personalities. They're, you know, they're little unique humans, and I got parented one way. My wife got parented another way. So for me, even those cultural differences from America and the UK, vastly different the way we were parented. So I've had to just adapt. And I've actually embraced the way my wife's parenting style, which is very, I would say, kind of open door policy, very family orientated. It's not to say that I wasn't brought up family orientated, but it's it's just a different style here, and I've actually really embraced it the way we've kind of oriented our child. Both on my wife's side and my and my side, we've kind of come from families with that suffer from depression and and anxiety, and we know this is hereditary. Damien Moore [00:09:06]: So we we're kind of aware and very conscious about that with our daughter, what kind of traits will she pick up from that, and she is a very anxious toddler. From a very young age, she would withhold, and withholding is when children obviously don't have much control over anything is when they withhold going to the toilet. So withholding their poo, so it's that can be quite stressful for a toddler, you know. They go 2 or 3 days without going to the toilet. And as a parent, we have to start, you know, pivoting and taking care of this because it can get quite serious if there's not she doesn't relieve herself. So we noticed these traits very early on and we kind of read up about it and it's it's typical anxiety within toddlers. And to this day, there's traits we see today. She's very easily startled, for example. Damien Moore [00:09:44]: So growing up and even like when she was 2, 3 years old, I work in the basement here at home sometimes. And if I just come up through the basement door, she'd easily be startled terrified, absolutely terrified, running, like screaming because a noise startled her. So we've had to really adjust the kind of how we parent her in a way that's kind of, I'd say, really conscious to that to her anxiety, and we make sure that she feels as safe as possible and that we're here. We're here for her. We're here to talk to her. We're here to listen to her. Just to understand those fears and kinda parent her in a way that's, not as I said earlier, not too controlling on her because she needs that control. She's like anxious, so she wants to control situations and she wants to kind of get through them in in her way and and manage it in her way. Damien Moore [00:10:24]: And I think, you know, we have to learn from our kids as well. Even from a very early age, we adapt as parents based on our kids' personalities. And while she has these anxious moments, she's also just an absolutely beautiful soul. I mean, she's just a delight to be around. She's a lot of fun as well. She likes to dance and giggle and all that. So it's just managing those different personality traits very early on. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:10:44]: So talk to me a little bit about mental health and some of the things that you just were talking about. The fact that, you know, you come from a family that has battled mental health issues. Your wife has as well. You're dealing with your own things that you are working through, whether it's things that you have had that you've brought with you through your own upbringing and your familial ties or the own your own issues that you're dealing with, and you're starting to see those things in your own child. Talk to me about what you've had to do thus far as you've worked with your own child to work through some of these? And what are some of the things that you think that you're going to have to do based on what you're seeing now and what you think may happen, seeing that she's only 4a half at this point? Damien Moore [00:11:33]: Both my wife and I, we both have, as I said, family history in in kind of depression and anxiety. And I was raised around that as a as a young child, and, my parents got divorced when I was about 6 years old. And, you know, as a child, you're not really aware of what's happening at that age. But as an adult, I've kind of really started questioning it and talking to my dad who suffers from depression to get his side of the story. I wanna understand from him what he went through at literally my age now. You know, he went through a divorce. He had 3 boys. And I was just I wanted to understand the stresses and pressures that he was under because when I went through COVID, as I said, a new dad lost my job. Damien Moore [00:12:07]: I had my own kind of battles at that time. So he was a great resource for me to talk to. He really kind of helped just explain things to me in certain ways that I was challenging my own self. So he was great to kind of be a a kind of a a person of of resource for me personally during some really difficult times. I think, you know, for our daughter, there are obviously child therapists out there that we, you know, we wanna potentially engage with at some point soon. We've noticed some of these behaviors have died down a little bit, like the the the startling doesn't happen as much now as it used to when she's 2 or 3 years old because some of the things that she just gets used to, her her surroundings and her environment. But we're aware that you know, we constantly talk, my wife and I, about these you know, about the kind of our upbringings and and how this may influence our daughter and and just very conscious and aware of her behaviors. And we're just lucky today, I think. Damien Moore [00:12:54]: You know, mental health is so much more prominent and so much more spoken. There's more visibility around it today than there was when my parents were growing up. When I spoke to my dad, I remember him saying to me, if he was having a down day, people would just say nip it in the bud, get on with your day kind of thing. That was the attitude. But today, people are so much more conscious about it. You know, companies have better kind of mental health, kind of resources available. So we're definitely lucky in that instance that we can have that access to great resources. I myself have actually personally started therapy for the first time in the last couple of months. Damien Moore [00:13:23]: I've never had therapy. I've never kind of felt the need of therapy. My wife's had therapy her entire life. So I've just wanted to kind of explore that for myself as an avenue just to kind of speak to someone else, speak to an independent individual that's not kind of part of, you know, my network of family and friends and not my wife's network of family and friends. And I've always just, you know, from the first session or 2, I've actually found it quite liberating just sharing stuff with someone I don't really know. And as I said, I've never done it before, so I'm kinda learning my own ways through therapy. And, you know, we'll tackle that with our daughter when we feel like we need to. We've got, obviously, her doctor we talk to a lot about. Damien Moore [00:13:56]: We ask her a lot of questions about certain things that, you know, we've noticed, and she gives us great advice already. So, yes, we take it day by day for now. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:14:03]: And it's all you can do. And I know that with all of those experiences, you got motivated. You got motivated to try to start having these conversations with other men, with other fathers, to be able to help individuals through a new venture called Dad's Daily Digest, the blog TikTok that you're trying to engage people to talk to people inspire people in different ways. Talk to me about Dad's Daily Digest Outside of what I just said, what were some of the impetuses for why you wanted to move in this way to be able to engage with other men in this way? Damien Moore [00:14:39]: The real motivation, my uncle committed suicide when I was probably my early twenties. I've had a friend commit suicide as well through alcohol abuse. Again, I was in my mid twenties when that happened. So I've been exposed to suicide, and I know the effects it hap it has on families. And when COVID hit, I started seeing the suicide rates going up. You know, you read about it in the news, you see it, and it disproportionately affects men. And I think last year, I think it was about 50,000 people commit suicides in the US alone last year. I think 80% of those were men. Damien Moore [00:15:10]: Now these statistics are alarming. And, you know, having gone through it with my uncle and knowing, you know, the pain and and it causes families is I wanted to create a platform of of sorts to, I guess, inspire people and also just maybe give tips and advice on life, having been through these experiences myself and knowing what it does to families. So I've started this, as you say, Dad's Daily Digest, where I wanted to share some of my own struggles I've gone through from my professional career to my personal life. And I said to myself, even if I just touch one person and inspire one individual from potential changing their mind on the way they go in life, that's all that matters to me. I'm not here to, like, change the whole world, but it's like I wanna make a little dent in that space. I wanna inspire men and be a resource of some sort of resource and maybe give tips and advice through that platform, and just to show that life is tough. I mean, we go through struggles, but you can persevere and you can really kind of rely on others. And I am very lucky. Damien Moore [00:16:10]: I know I'm very lucky that I've got a great network around me. I've really got a supportive family. I've got a supportive wife, and I've got her family that support me. So I know I'm blessed to have that, and I know some people don't have that necessarily. So if they just reach out through a platform and just wanna get ask a question or have a concern, I wanna be someone there potentially to help them. I just you know, as I said, even just touching one person's life would be would mean a lot to me. I've just started creating this platform just to kinda get content out there and be a bit more of a voice in that space to hopefully inspire other men. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:16:41]: Now you've just started this platform. You're starting to get words out there. What are you finding thus far in the conversations that you're having with people that you're interacting with? Damien Moore [00:16:49]: It's been actually quite lovely. I've actually came to a few dads who have similar TikTok channels, and I think it's just relatable. We you know, obviously, each family is unique in the way they bring their their children, but there's so much we can relate to, so many similar funny situations, stressful situations that you go through being a parent. So it's nice to know that there's a community of us out there in that space, giving this kind of motivation, inspiration for others. So it's nice to know that you're not alone out there, kind of, trying to do this. There are other people out there. I mean, even yesterday, I posted a video. My daughter did this really touching thing, and I just had to share it in the moment. Damien Moore [00:17:24]: I was taking her through to a Happy Meal at McDonald's, and we got approached by a homeless person at the window. Now I could see he really needed help, and he was actually you know, he didn't come too close to my window. He saw I had a young child, but he slowed a certain distance, and then he said, you know, I don't want money, I just want food. So I said, absolutely. What would you like me to get you? I'm putting the order in. He goes, just a burger and a bottle of water. So I said, absolutely. I'll get you a burger and a bottle of water. Damien Moore [00:17:46]: And my daughter reached over to give him a dollar bill because she likes to pay the person now at McDonald's money, she likes to do the kind of transaction. So she had this dollar bill in her hand, she gave it to him, and then he brought him to tears and then he brought me to tears because I was like, this gesture was just so beautiful, and even that post alone has kind of really reiterated that people just how beautiful these little moments. I mean, these children are so innocent, and it's just you know, I then had a whole conversation with her about homeless people because she wasn't you know, she was like, who is that person, daddy? Like, what what is he doing? And, you know, she wasn't used to this interaction with with a homeless person. So I come out to explain to her that homeless people are unfortunate individuals that don't have a home. We and I said, we're really lucky. We go to a home. We have a warm bed to sleep in. We can shower. Damien Moore [00:18:30]: And she even asked me, she goes, how does he shower? So, you know, she was really inquisitive about this individual. So I had to kind of, you know, explain to her, unfortunately, there are people out there that don't have homes and don't have families, and it's, you know, really tough on them. So and that's why I said to her. I said, your generosity was just so beautiful, Jessa, and it was so beautiful, and I just thanked her for that moment because I just, yeah, it got it nearly nearly brought me to tears. So I think, you know, and just seeing the the reaction to that video alone was just really nice, People kinda really sharing, like, their positivity around kind of that parenting and positivity around the child's behavior, and it's just great to see that there is this community out there for for people that that may need it. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:19:07]: It definitely warms your heart when you can see that and be able to be have that renewed sense of humanity that sometimes gets lost along the way. And sometimes we get lost in our own lives that it takes a child in the pure way that they see the world to be able to make us take a step back and say, Oh, yeah, you're right. I lost that along the way. And I got a good reminder today. Damien Moore [00:19:38]: Exactly. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:19:39]: So as you look at what you're doing right now, what you're putting out into the world, what you're trying to create, as you think about the future, where do you want this to go? Damien Moore [00:19:48]: For now, if I just touch a few individuals' lives, that would mean the world to me. You know, I think from from a personal standpoint, I'd like to have a stronger voice in that community. And, I mean, I think the ultimate goal one day, I would love to become a a motivational speaker. As I said, I'm an extrovert. I love being around people. I love, you know, trying to share my positivity and energy. I I kind of absorb other people's energy, and I would like to, you know, hopefully one day turn that into me being out there and being a strong voice and just helping people on more of a larger scale than just, you know, kind of a small platform for now. So, yeah, that's essentially where I'd like to go one day. Damien Moore [00:20:22]: Yeah. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:20:23]: I love it. It. Now we always finish our interviews with what I like to call our fatherhood 5, where I ask you 5 more questions to delve deeper into you as a dad. Are you ready? Damien Moore [00:20:31]: Sure. Yeah. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:20:32]: In one word, what is fatherhood? Damien Moore [00:20:34]: Beautiful. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:20:34]: Now I know your daughter's only 4 and a half, but I'm gonna still ask this question. When was the time that you finally felt that you succeeded at being a father to a daughter? Damien Moore [00:20:42]: I mean, even yesterday's moment was very touching. I guess when I see her sheer generosity and empathy and compassionate to other people. I've been a strong believer in actually raising my daughter around animals because of what that actually teaches children from a very young age. It teaches them responsibility, teaches them compassionate, empathy. Fortunately, it also teaches them about about death because we've had a couple of dogs die since she's been born and kind of explains to her what death is. But I think just seeing this beautiful girl through her life learnings and just seeing it kind of come out into the world to other people is a joy to see. So I think I take that as a success every day. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:21:19]: Now if I was to ask your daughter, how would she describe you as a dad? Damien Moore [00:21:22]: Probably say I'm quite silly. I like to do a lot of silly dancing with her. Ever since she was young, I I personally quite like my EDM music, and I like to get her into my DJs, so she's always kind of danced along to me. But I think also she probably I'm the one that's the slightly firmer one when it comes to consequences in the house. I think, you know, we all experience tantrums. We all experience that kind of naughty behavior. From about 3a half, 4 years old, she's been kinda testing the waters in terms of retaliation and testing, like, how far she can test her parents. So I probably am the firmer one compared to my wife. Damien Moore [00:21:56]: I like to give more consequences if I if I have to. So I don't know if I should use that, but I hopefully I think it should lead with silliness and fun because, personally, I had a good upbringing, but I wasn't necessarily raised by a dad who was silly and very fine and engaging. I was raised by great parents, but I don't recall my childhood memories as being silly and, like, just goofing around a lot. So I've wanted to instill that a lot in my parenting as my own you know, being a dad to my daughter. I just want it to be, like, lots of silliness and embrace that. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:22:27]: And if you think about this in, let's say, 15 years, what do you want her to say then? Damien Moore [00:22:32]: I hope she says that I've prepared her as best as pop as possible for the world. You know, I want her obviously to look up to me as as an inspiring figure in her life. I want her to feel that I've given her the most I possibly can in life. I've given her safety. I've given her a good upbringing. So, yeah, that they would be the things I'll dream of in terms of her saying to me. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:22:51]: Who inspires you to be a better dad? Damien Moore [00:22:53]: I have to say my mom. Because just knowing some of the upbringings that my family members have been through, I've always kind of just really pushed myself to be a better person. And I think she's always been there as my person that I go to whenever I reach my lowest moments. I always call her. She's my, you know, she's kind of carried me through many, many struggling moments in life, and she will still ahead in the future. And she's just my go to person for that. And she's definitely been my inspiration in life and inspired me to be a better dad, for sure. Damien Moore [00:23:23]: Now you've given a lot of piece of advice today, things for people to think about, things to ponder, for people to consider for their own mental health and being able to do what they have to do. As you think about any father, no matter what their situation, what's one piece of advice that you'd want to give to every dad? Damien Moore [00:23:42]: For me, personally, I've always liked to put things into perspective. I know we have to recognize our individual life and the stresses we deal with and not to ignore them. But at the same time, put things into perspective and just say to yourself, things could be so much worse. There's so much happening out there in the world where there are errands going through a lot harder things than you may be yourself. And I think it's important just to take a moment sometimes and just pause in that moment and say, do you know what? I'm blessed to have what I have right now. Like, I'm so thankful and share that gratitude and love to the people around you. And just know that it it can be so much tougher on other people in life. And I think just recognizing that and trying to instill that into your daily life a little bit, it's something I've always tried to live by just growing up. And I definitely share that kind of as my one kind of piece of advice to people. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:24:33]: Well, Damian, I just wanna say thank you. Thank you for sharing your own journey today, for sharing what you have gone through thus far, for sharing the resource that you're putting together. If people wanna find out more about you, where should they go? Damien Moore [00:24:46]: Yeah. So the the Dads Daily Digest website is is dadsdailydigest.co. And there's, yeah, there's a way you can reach out to me there. And there's also a TikTok channel if you wanna engage through TikTok. And also, I mean, I have a LinkedIn as well. So you can type my name in Damien Moore Evans, and you'll find me on LinkedIn as well. So happy to people if they choose to. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:25:04]: Well, Damien, thank you for being here today, and I wish you all the best. Damien Moore [00:25:07]: Thank you so much, Christopher. I appreciate it. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:25:09]: If you've enjoyed today's episode of the Dads with Daughters podcast, we invite you to check out the Fatherhood Insider. The fatherhood insider is the essential resource for any dad that wants to be the best dad that he can be. We know that no child comes with an instruction manual and most dads are figuring it out as they go along, and the fatherhood insider is full of resources and information that will up your game on fatherhood. Through our extensive course library, interactive forum, step by step roadmaps, and more, you will engage and learn with experts, but more importantly, dads like you. So check it out atfatheringtogether.org. If you are a father of a daughter and have not yet joined the dads with daughters Facebook community, there's a link in the notes today. Dads with daughters is a program of fathering together. We look forward to having you back for another great guest next week all geared to helping you raise strong and power daughters and be the best dad that you can be. Dr. Christopher Lewis [00:26:07]: We're all in the same boat And it's full of tiny screaming passengers. We spend the time. We give the lessons. We make the meals. We buy them presents and bring your AK. Because those kids are growing fast. The time goes by just like a dynamite blast. Calling astronauts and firemen, carpenters, and musclemen, get out and be the world to them. You're the best dad you can be. You're the best dad you can be.
In this episode, we're podcasting from the Oakes Bar and Grill at the Majestic Oaks Golf Club in Ham Lake, MN. The first caller lets us in on some secrets of the hotel front desk. The next caller rants about his girlfriend FaceTiming him too much. Another caller, who is on house arrest in Wisconsin, gets some ideas from us on how to pass the time. The last caller has a bad squirrel problem in Duluth, but we turn the negative into a positive by finding ways to make money from it. Don't have time to call in? Call our Voicemail line and tell us what's on your mind
Full show - Wednesday | Craigslist crazies | News or Nope - National Cheeseburger Day and seasonal workers | Delta underwear | OPP - Choosing between two men | Mushrooms and ED meds | Should Slacker send his daughter to school? | FaceTiming wedding guests | You be the judge - Classroom cupcakes | Do you have these things in your car? @theslackershow @thackiswack @radioerin
Is this a weird way to finalize your wedding guest list, or is T. Hack just getting old?
Jiwoo is FaceTiming her 7 year old daughter, Min, who is home alone for the day. She wasn't supposed to be but there was no other choice. Jiwoo had to go to work… But while Mina is FaceTiming with her mom during her mom's break - she starts dancing around in her new outfit that “Santa Clause” bought her. But Jiwoo notices something that sends a shiver down her spine… The camera starts to move. It's not on a tripod. It's not leaned up against the wall. Someone is zooming out to show off Mina's full outfit… But Mina is home alone. Which means - “Mina, who is filming right now? Who is Santa Clause? Who's holding the phone???MINA!” The phone call ends. To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices
Bridger narrowly avoids an emotional crisis when Maria Thayer (Strangers with Candy) storms in with a gift. The two discuss stolen firearms, FaceTiming without notice, and seeds. Don't forget to review the podcast, it's the least you can do. Follow the show on Instagram I Said No Gifts! Merch Send a Question to I Said No Emails! Support this podcast by shopping our latest sponsor deals and promotions at this link: https://bit.ly/3Uw1W4v Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Brianna Lapaglia and Grace O'Malley are joined by one of their favorite people of all time: Casey Affleck. Casey shares his experience writing and starring in new movie, The Instigators. 00:00 Intro 2:10 The Instigators 9:00 Writing & Acting 11:25 Bri & Grace's Accents 13:20 Theater Kids 18:55 Grace's Theater Camp 23:35 Podcasting 27:20 Social Media 33:22 Would Casey let his Kids be Actors? 34:55 Podcast Guests 38:50 Boston 43:50 Outro ------------ SUPPORT THE SHOW: Go to drinkpiratewater.com to find Pirate Water in a location near you! Download the Gametime app or go to https://gametime.co, enter your email, and redeem code PLANBRI for $20 off your first purchase (terms apply). Get your BODYARMOR Flash I.V. today at Walmart or a local grocery store near you! https://www.walmart.com/brand/bodyarmor/bodyarmor-flash-iv/10009866 Head to Sunglass Hut and discover the special selection of shades in store and online at https://sunglasshut.com. Sign up in the Uber or Uber Eats appYou can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/planbri
Lauren has had three very different births. She had a peaceful C-section due to breech presentation with a difficult recovery, a wild, unmedicated VBAC, and a calm, medicated 2VBAC. Due to her baby's large size, she had to have an extra incision made during her Cesarean leaving her with a special J scar. Though her provider was hesitant to support a TOLAC with a special scar, Lauren advocated for herself by creating a special relationship with her OB and they were able to move forward together to help Lauren achieve both of her VBACs. Lauren talks about the importance of having an open mind toward interventions as she was firmly against many of the things that ended up making her second VBAC the most redemptive and healing experience of all. How to VBAC: The Ultimate Prep Course for ParentsFull Transcript under Episode Details Meagan: Hey, hey everybody. Guess what? We have our friend Lauren and her 11-day-old baby. Is that right? Lauren: Yeah. Meagan: 11 days old. You guys, I actually didn't even know that this baby existed until we popped up on the Zoom and she was holding this precious little newborn. She was like, “Surprise! I had another VBAC.” So we will be sharing, well she will be sharing her two VBACs so 2VBAC and something kind of unique about Lauren is that she has a special scar, a special J scar, correct? Lauren: Yep. Meagan: Yeah, so that happened in her first C-section. If you are listening and you have a special scar or have been told that you have a special scar, this is definitely an episode that you are going to want to put on repeat and save because I know that there are so many people out there who are told that they have a special scar and that they should never or can never VBAC again. I know we're not even getting into the story quite yet, Lauren, but did you have any flack with that? Did anyone talk about your special scar at all? Lauren: Yes. Advocating for the VBAC is probably the overarching theme of my VBAC because I really had to go to bat for myself for that without switching providers. Meagan: Yeah. We know that's so common. We see it a lot in our community just in general trying to get a VBAC let alone a VBAC with a special scar. We are going to get into her story but I have a review and I didn't even know that this was a review. It was left in a Baby Bump Canada group on Reddit actually so that was kind of fun to find. It's really nice. It says, “Seriously, I'm addicted. I find them so healing. I had an unplanned and very much unwanted C-section and I have been unknowingly carrying around all of these emotions and trauma about it since. I thought I was empowered going into my first birth, but I wasn't strong enough to stop the medical staff with all of their interventions. Don't get me wrong, I believe interventions are necessary in some instances. But looking back now, I realize those interventions were put in place to make things easier involved in delivering my baby. Anyway, I won't get into all of that here, maybe in a separate post. The point of my post is checking out The VBAC Link podcast. I listen to them all day now while caring for my babe. They also have a course you can take focusing on preparing for VBACs. Even if you just like birth stories, they have CBAC stories I believe as well. On the podcast, a guest also pointed out that what do you want for a VBAC birth– peace, redemption, etc.? She talked about how you can still feel those things if you need a Cesarean.” I love that point of view right there that you can still have peace and redemption even if you have a scheduled C-section or if your VBAC ends in a Cesarean. It says, “Another mom pointed out when she was feeling hesitant about saying okay to a C-section, her midwife said, ‘You have permission to get a C-section,' not in a way that a midwife was giving her permission, but telling this mom, ‘C-section is okay and you shouldn't feel like having one is wrong.' My baby is 8.5 months and we aren't going to try for a baby until they're about 18-24 months mostly to increase my chances of VBAC, but I really love these podcasts.” Then she says, “Okay, I'll stop raving now.” I love that. Her title is, “If you're considering a VBAC, I highly recommend The VBAC Link.” Thank you so much to– I don't actually know what your name is. Catasuperawesome on this Baby Bump Canada group. Just thank you so much for your review. As always, these reviews brighten our day here at The VBAC Link but most importantly, they help other Women of Strength find these stories like what we are going to be sharing today with Lauren's story. They help people feel empowered and educated and motivated and even first-time moms. They are really truly helping people learn how to avoid unnecessary Cesareans. I truly believe that from the bottom of my heart. Meagan: Okay, Lauren. As you are rocking your sweet, precious babe, I would love to turn the time over to you to share your stories. Lauren: Awesome, thank you. It's so nice to be here finally. I'm so excited because this podcast truly is the reason why I had my VBAC. I am kind of weirdly unique in that I didn't really feel like I had any mothering instincts. My husband and I had been married for 6.5 years before we decided to get pregnant because I always swore off children. I said, “It's not for me. I'm never going to have children. I want to travel and I want to do all of these things and children are for other people. I can't imagine myself as a mom.” My husband said, “Well, let's wait until we are 30,” because we got married really young. He was like, “Let's just wait until we are 30 and we will revisit the discussion.” I always find it kind of nice when I hear stories of women who feel similarly to the way I did because it's so relatable and I feel like we are very few and far between. That's another reason I wanted to share my story because I know there are other women out there like me. So anyway, it just so happened that at this time, my sister was pregnant. My brother was pregnant. My husband's brother was pregnant. We were like, “You know, we're almost 30. We've waited a long time. If we're going to have kids, we might as well have a kid when he or she is going to have all of these cousins.” My husband was like, “Let's start trying.” I'm like, “Great. I'm going to give it two months and if we don't get pregnant, we're not going forward with this. I'm going to say I tried and I can tell everyone I tried and that it didn't work.” Well, God has a sense of humor because two weeks later, I had a positive pregnancy test. Meagan: Two weeks later? Lauren: Yes. Meagan: So you were already pregnant when you had this conversation. Lauren: I was already taking birth control. I was multiple days into the pack. I just threw it in the trash and was like, “Let's just see what happens.” I guess when you do that, you can get pregnant. I don't know. I didn't really have a cycle. I got pregnant. I was so naive about how it all worked. I'm like, “Okay. The test is positive. I'm pregnant. It is what it is. I'm very much pregnant.” I had not doubt. I had no worry about miscarriage, nothing because I had a positive pregnancy test. That's sort of how I went through my pregnancy, kind of disconnected, very naive, and a little bit in denial that I was actually pregnant all the way up until the end. I read one book and it was called The Girlfriend's Guide to Pregnancy and it's this really sarcastic, funny book. She's very flippant about pregnancy and very straightforward with my sense of humor. I liked it because I felt the same way. I wasn't mushy or emotional. I had no connection to the pregnancy. I am pregnant. That's a fact. Anyway, at 26 weeks, my doctor was like, “You know, I think he's breech.” I was like, “Okay.” I knew what breech was, but I'm like, “Okay, what does that mean?” She was like, “Well, I would start doing some Spinning Babies exercises. Let's just keep an eye on it. I was going to a chiropractor this whole time. This is important for people to know. I was going to a chiropractor before I even got pregnant regularly. This chiropractor was seeing me. I told her that the baby was breech. “Can you help me flip him? Can we do some bodywork?” I continued to see her. I don't know if it was once or twice a week but it was often. 36 weeks rolls around and I see the midwife in the practice. She is not finding the heartbeat where it should be. She finds it up higher and she goes, “Lauren, I think your baby is still breech.” I thought there was no way. I had been seeing a chiropractor. I had been doing body work and stuff. She was like, “Well, why don't you go see the chiropractor that our practice recommends?” I'm like, “Okay.” I call this chiropractor on the phone. I leave her a message and I'm like, “I've been seeing another chiropractor, but my baby is breech.” She immediately called me right back and she was like, “What has the chiropractor been doing?” I'm like, “It feels like a normal adjustment like nothing different from before I was pregnant.” She was like, “So you've been on your side and she's been twisting your back and your pelvis away from each other?” You know how they do those kinds of adjustments? I said, “Yes.” She was like, “Oh my gosh.” She's like, “How soon can you come see me?” I started seeing her. My OB actually also recommended moxibustion. She got me set up with an acupuncturist in the area which I thought was really cool that she was like, “Some people say they swear by this. You need to do more Spinning Babies. I want you to go to acupuncture.” I saw this chiropractor and she was like, “What that chiropractor is doing to you is not pregnancy-safe. She's not Webster-certified and you needed to be seeing a Webster-certified chiropractor.” That's one of my regrets because I feel like had I known, obviously, I can't say I blame her 100%. I was also working out a ton because I'm like, “I don't want this pregnancy to change my body. I'm going to be skinny.” That's all I cared about so I'm sure I was holding my abdominal muscles way too tight too. I'm sure I contributed to it as well, but just knowing that probably was a major contributor to what ended up happening to this day irritates me. But anyway, he never flipped. He was solidly in my ribcage. He never moved. I would push on his head and he would not even budge an inch. My doctor was like, “You know, I would normally recommend an ECV, but he seems very wedged in your rib cage. He's stargazing,” which means his head is tilted up. His chin is pointed up. She said, “You are on the low end of normal for amniotic fluid.” She was like, “You have these three strikes against you basically. We can try it if you want to try it, but I'm going to say it's probably not going to work.” I had to wrestle with that. I ended up calling my husband's aunt who is a labor and delivery nurse for 30 years. I asked her for her opinion. I'm like, “Have you ever been in on an ECV? Tell me about it.” Naively, I went with her advice. She said, “If your doctor is not confident, then that means it's not going to work.” She's like, “I've seen so many births and I believe that every baby should be delivered via C-section because birth is dangerous and it's scary.” I'm like, “Okay, okay. I'm just going to move forward with the C-section. I'm so glad I talked to you.” Meagan: Whoa. Lauren: We scheduled the C-section and you know what? It really wasn't that big of a deal. My friend's husband was actually my anesthesiologist. My doctor was there. It was very happy. It was very pleasant. I had gone out to dinner with my friends the night before. If you could plan the perfect C-section, it was the perfect C-section. I just talked to my friend's husband the whole time. Again, not connected to this pregnancy at all. It was very much like, “Okay, a baby is going to come out. What is this going to be like?” I remember the doctor held him up over the curtain. I made eye contact with him and I was like, “Oh my gosh. I'm a mom.” The nurse was like, “Do you want to do skin-to-skin?” I was like, “What's that? Sure.” “Do you want to breastfeed?” “I think so. Sure.” Very naive. What ended up happening was that the recovery was just really tough. The surgery was great, but I did not expect the recovery to be so tough. I feel like the way people speak of C-sections is so casual. “Oh, just have a C-section. I had C-sections for all my babies. It's no big deal. It's a cakewalk.” That's the mindset I went into it with. Same with my husband because I reassured him, “It's no big deal. We're just going with the flow.” No. It's awful. It's major surgery. I'm allergic to– I think a lot of people are– the duramorph that they put in the spinal so I had the most severe, horrible itching for 24 hours to the point that they basically overdosed me on Benadryl because I could not cope and my vitals were crashing. I was barely having any respiration. They had to shake me awake and put cold washcloths on my head. They were like, “Hello,” because I was having such a hard time with the itching. Not only that, but the pain. It's painful. In my surgery, backing up a little bit, the doctor said, “Wow. He's really wedged in there and he's a lot bigger than I expected. I thought he was going to be maybe 7.5-7.25 pounds.” She goes, “He tore your incision coming out because he was so big.” She was like, “You have a J incision now so your incision goes horizontal and then vertically up.” She said, “Unfortunately, that means you'll never be able to have a VBAC. You're just going to be a C-section mama.” I was just lying there like, “Whatever. You're asking me what skin-to-skin is and breastfeeding and no vaginal births.” It was just a lot of information to process and take in and make decisions about. He ended up being 9 pounds. He was a good-sized baby. Anyway, that was my c-section experience. I know I'm probably one of the lucky few who could say that their C-section was so peaceful, really no trauma from it. I just thought, “I'm fine with that.” I watched my sister have a failed TOLAC and it looked kind of traumatizing and she was still traumatized from it just a couple months before my C-section so I'm like, “It's fine. I'll just be a C-section mom, but that recovery was terrible so I'll have one more baby and that's it.” I'm not going to have any more kids. I don't want to experience that again. That was May 2019. Fast forward to COVID times. We were thinking about getting pregnant before my son turned one but COVID hit so we were like, “Let's just give it a couple of months and see what shakes up with this pandemic.” The world stopped. I'm in real estate so for a while, we weren't allowed to show any property or do anything so I just was sitting at home doing nothing. I remember one night, I was just sitting there doing a puzzle bored as heck and I'm like, “I'm going to go listen to a podcast while I do this.” My phone suggested The Birth Hour. I hope I'm allowed to say that. Meagan: I love The Birth Hour, yes. Lauren: I was scrolling through the episodes and there was one on VBAC. I'm like, “Okay, I'm going to listen to this.” The interviewee mentioned The VBAC Link so I was like, Okay, I should check that podcast out. I was like, Why am I even listening to this? This is so not my wheelhouse, childbirth. I still didn't care about it, but listening to these podcasts opened up a whole new world for me. I'm so glad I found it all before I got pregnant. I started listening to all of those podcasts then I think I found through your podcast. I don't think it was The Birth Hour. Someone mentioned Dr. Stu so I started listening to his podcast and man, that guy set fire. He had so much great information. I listened to every podcast pretty much that he had done, especially the ones on VBAC because he talks about VBAC a lot and just how it really shouldn't be a big deal or shouldn't make you high risk and all of that. At the time, he was still graciously reviewing people's op-reports for them and now he doesn't do that. I think you have to pay for it, but I emailed him. I reached out to him and I emailed him my op report and I just said, “If you could look at this, my provider told me I wasn't a VBAC candidate but I want your opinion.” He got right back to me and he was like, “There's no reason you can't have a VBAC. This scar is really not that big of a deal. Yes, it's a special scar, but it shouldn't take away from your opportunity to TOLAC.” I ended up getting pregnant in the fall of 2020 and I went to my first appointment and my OB was like, “What do you want to do for your birth this time?” I'm like, “Did she forget what she told me? She must have forgotten.” I was like, “I want a VBAC.” She was like, “Okay, I'll give you my VBAC consent form and we can talk about it as your pregnancy progresses.” I'm like, “Okay, cool.” I saw her again at 12 weeks and she was like, “I'm having some hesitations because you had such a big baby and your scar is not normal. I think we need to talk about this a little bit more but let's not worry abou tit now. We can put it off and worry about it later.” I was like, “Okay.” I was so bummed because I love my OB. Funny story, I met my OB when I was worked for a home design company called Pottery Barn and I met her one day just helping her buy pillows. I'm like, “What do you do for work?” She was like, “I'm an OB.” I'm like, “Cool. I need an OB.” I had just moved to the area so I just started seeing her. I think I was one of her first patients so she knew me. It wasn't like she was a friend and a provider I only saw once a year, but we always picked up where we left off. We had a good relationship. I really did not want to change providers. I don't want this to sound like I was being manipulative, but I was like, I'm just going to really lean into this good relationship we have and just try to win her over. As the pregnancy progressed, at the next appointment I think I saw a midwife. I talked to the midwife about the VBAC and my OB's opinion and she was like, “I've seen a lot of women VBAC with a J scar at my old practice. I don't think it's a big deal, but I'll talk to the doctor for you and hopefully, we can figure this out.” I was like, “Okay.” Then I want to say I went to my 20-week appointment and they told me, “Okay, your baby is gigantic.” They said, “He is going to be between 9 and 10 pounds,” because he was measuring two weeks ahead. They said, “But the other concern we have is that you have marginal cord insertion and that could make for a small baby.” I'm like, “Okay, so is he big, or is he small?” Clearly that marginal cord insertion is helping him not being 12 pounds? What are you trying to tell me? They're like, “Either way, we suggest that you come back at 32 weeks. We have concerns about his size. He might be a tiny peanut. He might be enormous.” I'm like, “I think I'm good. Thanks, but no thanks.” Thanks to you guys, you push advocation so much that I'm like, “This doesn't add up. You can't tell me that he's too big and too small. I'm just going to go with fundal height and palpation if my doctor has a concern, we'll come back.” I never scheduled that growth scan. I was very protective of this pregnancy. I didn't want any outside opinions. I was so afraid that if I went and had this growth scan, I would be pushed to do a C-section. I wanted an unmedicated birth. I was terrified of the hospital. I was listening to so many podcasts all day every day. It was like an obsession so then I told Meagan before we were recording is that I felt like I was almost idolizing the VBAC. It was all I could think about. It was all I could talk about and it became this unhealthy obsession. Right around 25-26 weeks, I decided to hire a doula and move forward with the VBAC. It didn't matter to me what the doctor said. Right around that time, I was having some hesitations. Just getting that pushback from my doctor and knowing he was big, I started to let the fear creep in. I told my husband, “You know what? Maybe we should just do a C-section. I think I'm overanalyzing this so much. I'm just going to push aside this research I have done because clearly I'm obsessed and it's consuming me.” Meagan: Yeah, which is easy to do. Just to let you know, it really is easy to let it consume you. Lauren: It totally is. I think that we have to take a step back sometimes, come back to reality, and if you let the information override your instincts which I think is really easy to do, I think you can get too wound up or too set on something that might not be meant for you. Speaking of instincts, that night, I still remember. I had told my husband, “I'm just going to have a C-section.” I went to bed and I had a dream. I was in the hospital in the dream and I was holding my baby and my dad walked in. I have a really great relationship with my parents but especially my dad. I love my dad. He comes in the room and he's like, “How did it go?” He was meeting the baby for the first time and I burst into tears in the dream. I said, “Dad, I didn't even give myself the opportunity to VBAC. I just went in for a C-section. I just have so much regret about it and what could have happened if I had tried to have a VBAC.” Meagan: That just gave me the chills. Lauren: Yes. It was so weird. I have never really had a dream like that before. I woke up and I was like, “There's my answer. I have to move forward with this.” Having that dream gave me this peace that there is the instinct I need to follow. Yes, I have all of this information that is consuming me, but it was like, Keep going. I hired a doula which I found through The VBAC Link Facebook page. I put it out there, “Does anyone know a doula in my area?” Julie commented and it happened to be her really good friend who had just moved back to my area. I called her and it turned out that we had mutual friends. We connected really fast. I think, like I said, it was about 26 weeks. I go to my OB again and we had more of a pow-wow like a back-and-forth on the VBAC option. She was like, “I'm just worried about it. A C-section is not that big of a deal. We could just tie your tubes and then you won't have pelvic floor issues.” False. I said, “I got a second opinion from another doctor.” I didn't say it was Dr. Stu. I didn't say it was some guy with a podcast in LA. I said, “I got a second opinion and I feel like I just want the opportunity.” We didn't really land on anything solid, but she got up to leave the room and she got to the door and she turns around. She came back over to me and she gave me this big hug. She said, “I don't want to disappoint you. I want you to be happy, but let's keep talking about this.” I was like, “Okay.” That gave me a little bit of reassurance that I was leaning into that relationship I had built with her over the years because it had been 6 or 7 years of seeing her. I would also bring her flowers. I would always try to talk to her about her life and making a social connection with someone. If you let your doctor intimidate you just from the standpoint of being a stranger, I feel like that can really change the course of your care. But if you try to get to know people, and that's not necessarily a manipulative thing, but I think it's important. It should be important in your relationship with your doctor. If you don't feel like you can connect with them, there is issue number one, but I really felt like I could connect with her. I leaned into that. I have a cookie business on the side. She loved my cookies. We just had some other things to talk about other than my healthcare and I feel like it set this foundation of mutual respect. What doctor comes over, gives you a hug, and tells you, “I want you to love your birth”? So fast forward again, I see her again the next time and she said, “Look. I brought your case to my team and because we support moms who have had two C-sections, we felt like your risk is similar to theirs and that it shouldn't risk you out of a TOLAC so I'm going to support you if this is what you want.” I had given her this analogy that I think was Julie's analogy. She said, “If you needed heart surgery and you were told that you had a 98% chance of success–” because I think my risk of rupture was 2% or maybe a little bit lower, maybe 1.5. I told her this. I'm like, “If you told me I needed heart surgery and I had a 98 or 99% chance of success, we would do it. There would be no question. I have this 1% risk of rupture. I'm coming to the hospital. What gives? I should at least be able to try.” The problem is, I'm sure some people are like, “Why didn't you just switch providers?” We have three hospitals in my area. One is 20 minutes from me and two are one hour away. One of them which is an hour away is the only place where I can VBAC and there isn't a VBAC ban. There is maybe a handful of providers who deliver there. I knew my provider was VBAC-supportive sort of. She had the most experience of a lot of the providers around me so that's why I didn't switch. I had very minimal options for care. I couldn't go to LA or I couldn't go somewhere further away. It would be a four-hour drive either way. We are in an isolated area. I felt like that was a huge win. We are set to go. I remember I told Katrina. Katrina was so happy for me, my doula. I just soldiered on. I started taking Dr. Christopher's Birth Prep at 36 weeks. I was doing my dates and I was really busy in real estate. That's part of my story. I was so busy working super hard and I was getting to the end of my pregnancy. At 38 weeks, I went in and I had clients lined up showings coming up. I was like, “I can't have a baby anytime soon.” I was talking to my provider about it. “Maybe at 40 weeks, we can talk about a membrane sweep or something. I have so much on my plate. I can't have a baby this week.” My husband is a firefighter and his shift that he was going to be taking off was starting maybe the following week. I'm like, “He's not even going to be home. He's going to be gone most of this week. This is a horrible week to have a baby.” I let her check my cervix because I'm like, “I want to see if my birth prep or my dates are doing anything.” At the same time, I still had this fear of, What if I do all of this work and I don't even dilate? That was kind of what happened with my sister so I had that fear in the back of my mind. She checks me and she was like, “You are 2 centimeters dilated, 50% effaced. You're going to make it to your due date no problem. We're not even going to talk about an induction until 41 weeks.” She was like, “I'm just not worried about it. He doesn't feel that big to me. He doesn't feel small. He doesn't feel too big. He feels like a great size.” I said, “I know. I feel really confident that he's going to be 8 pounds, 2 ounces.” I spoke that out. I said, “That's my gut feeling. I just have so much confidence and peace about this birth. I just know it's going to work out.” I go on my merry little way from that appointment. I'm walking around. We had gone down to the beach. We were walking around and I'm like, “Man, I'm so crampy. For some reason, that check made me so, so crampy.” This was 38 weeks exactly. We go back home and I have prodromal labor that night. I'm telling Katrina about it. She goes, “You know, I bet the check irritated your uterus.” The next day, I start having some bloody discharge. I'm like, “What is this? What does this mean?” I told Katrina and she said, “It could mean nothing. It could mean labor is coming soon. We'll just have to see.” I hadn't slept the whole night before. She was like, “You need to get a good night's sleep.” I had to show property all day. I met these clients for the first time. I showed four or five houses to them and meanwhile, I'm like, “Gosh, I'm so sore and tired and crampy.” I told them, “I'm very obviously pregnant, but my due date is not until the end of the month.” This was June 10th and my due date was June 23rd. I said, “We have time. If you need to see houses, it shouldn't be a big deal. I don't want my pregnancy to scare you away.”That night, I get home and I'm like, “I'm going to bed. It's 8:00. I'm going to bed. I'm going to take Benadryl and I'm going to get the best night's sleep.” They call me at 9:00 PM and they're like, “Lauren, we saw this house online. It's brand new on the market. We have to see it.” They lived a couple of hours away so I'm like, “I'll go and I'll Facetime you from the house. I'll go tomorrow.” Tomorrow being June 11th. I'm like, “We'll make it happen. I promise I will get you a showing on this house.”I texted Katrina and I'm like, “Oh my gosh. I feel so crampy and so sore. Something might be going on, but I have to work tomorrow. I'll keep you posted.” I wake up the next morning. It's now June 11th and I lose my mucus plug immediately first thing. There was some blood. It was basically bloody show. I told Katrina and she's like, “Okay, just keep me posted. I have a feeling he's going to come this weekend. It was a Friday. I'm like, “Well, he can't because my husband works Saturday, Sunday, Monday. I don't have time to have a baby.” We go to the showing. I'm finally alone without my toddler and my husband. I'm in the car and I'm like, “Man, my lower back hurts. It's just coming and going but nothing to write home about, just a little bit of cramping.” Of course, I never went into labor with my first so I did not know what to expect. I get to the showing and this house had a really steep staircase. I'm Facetiming my clients and I'm going up the stairs. It was probably at noon and I'm thinking to myself, Man, it's really hard to go up these stairs. Why do I feel so funny? I finish up the showing and they're like, “We want the house. This is the house for us.” I get back in the car. I'm getting all of their information. I'm talking to the other agent. I start the offer and I'm like, “I'm just going to drive home and get in my bed because I don't feel good. I'm just going to write this offer from my bed and everything will be fine.” I get home and I tell my husband at 2:30, “I'm just going to sit in our bed and get this offer sent off.” Mind you, I had a work event, a big awards event that night for my whole office and we were going to have to leave at 4:00 PM. My in-laws were going to come get my son and take him to sleep over. It's 2:30. I'm writing this offer and I'm like, “I don't feel good.” My partner calls me. I tell her, “Listen, I don't know if I'm in labor, but I don't feel well. Maybe I have a stomach bug. I'm going to write this offer. I'm going to give you my clients' information and I want you to take over for me a little bit. They know I'm really pregnant, but this could just be a sickness but either way if something happens, I want them to have the best care and be taken care of if we are going to send this offer off.” I send the offer off. It's 3:30 at this point. I close my computer and I'm waiting for them to DocuSign. I text my husband, “There's no way I'm going tonight. I don't feel well. Something is up. I'm not sure what.” He didn't see my text for a little while. He comes in the room at 4:00 and he starts to talk to me. I literally fall to the ground with my first contraction. I'm in active labor.I don't know it yet, but I'm in active labor. I'm just like, “It feels like there's a wave crashing in my body.” That was the best way I could describe it. I'm like, “I feel this building. It's an ebb and flow,” but it reminded me of playing in the waves as a kid because I grew up in Orange County at the beach and just that feeling of the waves hitting you when you are playing in the surf. I'm like, “This is really intense. What is going on?” I'm like, “I'm certain it's a stomach bug.” I told him, “I have gas or something.” I was just like, “I'm going to give myself an enema and this will all go away.” I did that and sitting down on the toilet, I was like, “Oh my gosh.” It made everything so much more intense. I texted Katrina, “Something is going on. I'm not really sure it is.” She's like, “Well, why don't you try timing some contractions for me and let me know?” I crawl into my closet. I can hear my son and my husband getting ready. My son was 2 so of course, 2-year-olds are not always behaving. I can hear them interacting. I crawl into my closet and I'm lying on the floor in the dark. The contractions are 3.5-4 minutes apart lasting a minute. I was like, “I'm still pretty sure this is a stomach thing that is happening every 3-4 minutes.” I call Katrina and I'm like, “I don't know. I think I'm in labor. This is the length of my contractions. It's probably just prodromal.” I had so much prodromal.She was like, “Um, it doesn't really sound like prodromal labor, but I'll let you just figure it out. You let me know when you are ready for support. Make sure you are eating anything. Have you eaten anything today?” “No.” “Have you had any water?” “Not really.” “Okay. Please eat something. Please drink some water and keep me posted.” She goes, “Can you talk through the contractions?” I said, “I can cry.” She's like, “Okay. I'm ready to go as soon as you tell me.” Then the next thing I know, literally, this is probably an hour later so at 4:00 I had my first contraction. Now it's 5:00 and I'm like, “The contractions are 3 minutes apart and lasting a minute.” I said, “Maybe you should come over. I think Sean (my husband) is getting a little nervous.” We were still so naive. We didn't know what labor looked like and what was going on. We were like, “If we're not going to the event, why don't we just keep August (my son) at home? I'll just make him dinner and I'm going to make you dinner.” He starts prepping dinner and I'm like, “I don't think either of us really know what's going on.” Of course, Katrina knew what was going on and probably thought I was a crazy person but I was very much in denial. We texted her to come over and she gets there. I'm lying in my bed and she's like, “Okay, yeah. They're coming 2.5-3 minutes apart. If you're ready to go to the hospital, I'm ready to go with you.” I'm mooing through these contractions, vocalizing everything. I'm like, “It just feels good to vocalize and I just really keep having to use the bathroom. It's probably just my stomach.” She's like, “No.” I can hear her outside my bathroom telling my husband, “I think we should go. She's really vocalizing a lot and that usually means it's pretty substantial, active labor.” Meanwhile, all I can think about is, “I've got to get this offer in for my clients.” I'm waiting on DocuSign, checking my email. Finally, it comes through. This is 6:00, maybe 6:30. I see it come in. I send it off and I'm standing at my kitchen counter with my computer on, mooing, doing this freaking offer. I go to cross my legs as I'm leaning over and I'm like, “I can't cross my legs, Katrina. I feel like my bones are separating.” She's like, “Yeah, baby is probably descending into your pelvis. I think we should get going if you're okay with going.” We have a 45 to an hour drive depending on traffic and the time of day. It's a Friday night so basically where I live, there's not a ton of traffic but we get in the car. She's following us and we get to the hospital. It's probably 7:15-7:30 or something like that. I'm telling my husband as I'm mooing through these contractions, “This really isn't that bad. If this is labor, it's intense and it feels like there's an earthquake in my body, but I would not tell you that I'm in any pain right now.” He's like, “Okay, whatever you say lady.” We ended up having to walk across the whole hospital parking lot to the ER because the regular hospital entrance was closed. As soon as we walked in the hospital, the hormones changed. The adrenaline kicks in. I start feeling pain. I start feeling a little bit panicky and it starts getting harder to cope through these contractions. I'm on the floor of the triage room crying into a trash can and everyone is staring at me. Katrina's like, “They need to stop staring!” She was trying to defend me while my husband is answering all of their dumb questions like, “What's your favorite color? What city is your mom born in?” They're like, “Let's just put you in a wheelchair and get you up there.” I'm like, “I can't sit.” Anytime I tried to sit, the contractions were a minute apart and they were so intense. I get there and I was so protective of this birth and outside interventions, I just was like, “Everything is evil. Cervical checks are evil. The epidural is evil. Everything is going to make me have a C-section.” I was like, “I don't want to know how dilated I am. I don't want anyone in this room to know except the nurse. That's who is allowed to know how dilated I am.” She checks me and the doctor comes in. It was the hospitalist and of all the providers in my area, it was miraculous that I got this hospitalist because he has so much experience. He is so calm, so kind, so supportive. He just said, “Hi, Lauren. I'm Dr. so-and-so and you're in labor. Happy laboring.” No concerns about my TOLAC, nothing. He didn't even bring it up. He didn't ask to check, nothing. Just, “Happy laboring,” and he left the room. I'm like, “Okay. Clearly I'm in active labor.” So then they were getting the tub ready because my room had a tub and as we were waiting for it to warm up, I'm sitting on the ball. I'm having all this bloody show. The nurse asked to check me again before I get in the tub. Unknowingly, I had been 5 centimeters when we arrived. I was 7 now when we got in the tub an hour later. I get in the tub and I wouldn't say it provided me any relief. Honestly, I was so in my head and not necessarily in pain, just so mentally unaware of everything going on, in labor land, but also very overwhelmed by the intensity of it. I told Katrina, “George Washington could have been sitting in the corner watching me labor. I would not have known.” I barely opened my eyes. I had a nurse who was there sitting with us because I had to have a one-on-one nurse for being high-risk and I had to have continuous fetal monitoring. Because I was in the water, she needed to sit there and make sure the monitors didn't move. I couldn't have told you what she looked like, nothing. I didn't speak to her. I was in another world. I think I maybe was in the tub for 30 minutes to an hour. It's probably 9:00 or 10:00. I can't even remember the timeline of it but it wasn't that long of a labor. My water breaks and I start grunting. They're like, “Let's get you out of the tub. Let's get you out of the tub.” I think I was 9 centimeters at this point. We arrived at 7:30. This is probably 10:00 PM or something like that. I'm like, “Okay. I'm just going to lean over the back of this bed and just moo and make noises.” Me being who I am and not super emotional, I'm making jokes about how I sound. I'm like, “You guys, I sound like Dory in Finding Nemo. I'm so embarrassed. Please don't look at my butthole.” I was naked. I'm making all these jokes and coping, I would say pretty well in terms of pain but just very overwhelmed by the intensity of it. They come in and check me and they're like, “Okay, you're complete.” This is at 11:00 PM maybe or 10:30, something like that. But she was like, “You have a little bit of a cervical lip.” It was a provider I hadn't met before at my OB's office but they were like, “We will just let you do your thing. You sound pushy but please don't push because you have a lip. Let's just let him descend.” I could feel his head inside of myself. I could feel his head coming down. I was like, “I want it to be over. I want it to be over.” I'm still in denial of this whole thing this entire time. Are we sure it's not poop? I know there's a baby coming out. Once my water broke, I'm like, “Okay, I guess I'm having a baby.” That was really, truly the first time that I was like, “Okay, this is really happening.”Maybe 30 minutes later, the hospitalist peeks his head in the room and he's like, “Lauren, why don't you try laying on your side?” I tried and it was too painful. I flip over on my back and three pushes later, he comes flopping out. I screamed him out and it was super painful. I was so overwhelmed by how painful it was. I just screamed like a crazy, wild woman. He's on my chest and he's screaming and I'm in all this pain and then she's like, “I've got to give you lidocaine. You tore a little bit. I'm going to stitch you up.” It was just all this pain happening at once, but I was like, “I got my VBAC. That's all that matters. No one touched me and I got my VBAC. I don't care about anything else.” Anyway, it was great. I would not change it for the world because I never had a ton of pain. I never really thought I needed an epidural, but it was a little bit mentally overwhelming. Meagan: Mhmm, sure. Lauren: Anyway, that was my first VBAC. The doctor said, “You pushed so primally. That was the most amazing thing I've ever seen.” The hospitalist was like, “That was incredible to watch. You are a badass.” I was like, “That was such a compliment because I didn't know what I was doing and you're this doctor with all the experience.” Anyway, fast forward to my third pregnancy. This is now the summer of 2023. We decide we're going to have one more baby. I of course had no issues with the VBAC this time because I had a successful TOLAC with my second. I made it to 20 weeks. I had COVID, RSV, and the flu all right around then so they were telling me, “Your baby is measuring totally normal.” I'm like, “Yeah, because I've been sick as a dog for 6 weeks.” I'm like, “Maybe I'm going to get this newborn who is a normal size,” because my son was born at 38 and 2, the second one, and he was 8 pounds, 3 ounces. I had told my doctor 8 pounds, 2 ounces. I was one ounce off. I was like, “Maybe I'll get this little peanut baby and it's going to be so great. I'll finally have a newborn who fits in a diaper for more than two days.” Then I hit 33 weeks and I got huge. I just exploded inside. I go to my OB and I'm like, “I don't feel good. I'm too big. This baby is too big. Something is wrong.” She's like, “No, Lauren. I really just think you make big babies and he just went through a growth spurt. Let's not worry. I'm not going to have you do an ultrasound or anything like that. If he continues to measure 2-3 weeks ahead,” because I was measuring 36 weeks at 33 weeks, “then we can talk about it, but I don't want to worry about it.” I was like, “Okay.” I was having all of this round ligament pain more than I had with my others and prodromal labor was so painful. I remember telling Katrina who I hired again, “I feel like something is wrong with my muscles. I just am so uncomfortable. But I don't want to make any rash decisions based on it. I might get an epidural if this keeps up because this doesn't feel normal. “She was like, “Okay, whatever works.” So I get to my 38-week appointment and I'm thinking, I'm going to have this baby at 38 weeks just like I had my second baby. I had everything ready. Everything was good to go at my house and then day by day, it ticks on. Baby is not coming. Baby is not coming. I was due April 6th. This was just this year, 2024. I get to 38 weeks. I tell my doctor, “Just strip my membranes. I don't even care.” She was like, “Okay, I guess if that's what you want.” She did. Nothing happened. 39 weeks rolls around. She strips my membranes again. Nothing really happens and then the night of Easter, I had this strange experience where I woke up in the middle of the night and I had this contraction that wouldn't end. I couldn't feel the baby move and it freaked me out. I did everything I could to get him to move. I was in the shower. I was eating. I was drinking and doing all of these things. Finally, I called Katrina at 2:00 in the morning. I'm like, “My baby's dead. I'm 100% sure he's gone. What do I do?” She's like, “Lauren, just relax. Lie on your side and drink something sweet.” We were ready to go to the hospital. I remember we had a stethoscope. I got the stethoscope and I put it right where I knew his heartbeat was and I heard a heartbeat. I burst into tears. It was the first time I've ever cried with any of my babies even being put on my chest. I just felt this relief because I had so much anxiety about him with my size being so big and the pain I was having. I was like, “I just want this baby out.” I never really felt that way, but it was this desperate anxiety. A couple of days passed and I'm now in week 39. I'm like, “My uterus is silent like a little church mouse. She's not doing a thing. She's not cramping. She's not contracting. No discharge, nothing.” I'm like, “This baby is never going to come.” I tell my doctor at my 39-week appointment, “If this baby hasn't come by Friday, I'm back here and I want another membrane sweep.” I felt kind of crazy because I'm like, “This is technically an induction, like a natural and I'm intervening.” Me who never wanted anyone to touch me and now I'm like, “Please touch me and pull this baby out of my body.” She goes to check me and she's like, “Lauren, I think he's coming tonight. Your body contracted around my hand when I tried to sweep you. I just wouldn't be surprised. Don't worry.” I'm like, “Okay, well you're breaking my water on Monday.” I was 3 or 4 centimeters dilated and I'm like, “We're waiting until Monday but I want you to break my water because I'm over it.” She's like, “That's a good idea. Let's threaten this baby and he'll come right out.” This was early in the morning on Friday, the 5th. Anyway, I had all of this anxiety and I just felt like he needed to come out. I couldn't get any peace until I knew he was alive and happy and healthy and on my chest. Friday afternoon, I felt crampy just a little bit the whole day and then at 4:30 PM, I feel this gush and I'm like, “Okay. Is that my water or is it my pee?” because his head felt like it was on my bladder. I didn't say anything to anyone. Then 6:00 rolls around. I text Katrina. I'm like, “Listen, I felt a little gush and I keep feeling it. I put a pad on and it doesn't seem to be urine. I'm not really sure what's happening. I'm just going to do some Miles Circuit and I'll update you.”At 7:30, I'm cleaning my kitchen and all of a sudden, I'm hit with an active labor contraction. I'm like, “Not again. I want labor to start normally so I know what's happening.” No. Baby's like, “I'm ready.” At 7:30, I tell her, “Okay, I'm feeling contractions. I'm getting in the shower to see if it will stop. It might be prodromal. Let's give it an hour. I'm going to text you, but they are 2.5 minutes apart.” She's like, “I'm at dinner. I'm getting boxes. Just let me know.” I was like, “Okay. It might stop though so I wouldn't worry about it.” No, it did not stop. She gets to my house at 9:00 and my car is already running. I'm like, “We're going.” I am mooing through these contractions. I'm going to pop this baby out right now. I had thankfully put some chux pads in the back of my car. I'm on all fours in the back of my car. Mind you, we have to drive an hour to the hospital. I peed all over the chux pad. I just was like, “He's on my bladder. He's on my bladder.” It was so painful and I couldn't control anything. I'm like, “Is this water? Is this pee? I don't even know what's happening.” We get to the hospital. He did not come in the car, thank God, but we did have to go to the ER again and the ER was taking forever. It took a half hour to get me up to labor and delivery as I'm actively mooing in front of the hospital. I was like, “I'm not going in,” because there was a little girl sitting in the waiting room and some convict sitting with a police officer. I'm like, “I'm not having my labor in front of these people!” Even the police officer came out and he was like, “I don't understand what is taking so long. You are clearly about to have this baby. I will bust open these doors for you and walk you up to L&D myself if that's what it takes.” Finally, they got me up there. I arrived. I told Katrina and my husband, “You guys, I'm getting an epidural.” I said, “I have had so much anxiety and so much pain. This does not feel like my previous labor. This feels like I'm suffering.” I said, “I just want to smile. I just want to smile. I want to smile this baby out.” We get up there. I'm 8 centimters dilated. This was the part of the story that I feel like it comes back to advocating for myself. I go in there and I'm like, “I don't care what you need from me. I just need the epidural and stat.” The nurses are scrambling and this doctor walks in. I am on all fours on the bed just staring at the ground, actively transitioning. I see this doctor walk in. I see his feet and he had his shoelaces untied. Immediately, I'm just like, “No. It's a no.” I don't know why. I just was like, “Your shoes are dirty and they are untied. You seem like a hot mess. I'm already a hot mess. I want someone to come in and just be like clean-cut and normal.” He starts asking me all these questions. He's asking me my whole health history, everything about my grandparents, my parents, all of this stuff. I'm in transition then he goes, “You're aware of the risk of TOLAC, right?” I said, “Yes.” He goes, “That your uterus could burst wide open?” I literally saw red. I'm in a contraction and I just screamed like a wild lady. I was like, “Get out.” I wanted to add on some expletives and tell him to get out of the room. I just said, “Get food.” He was like, “I'm just saying.” He ended up leaving and my nurse peeks her head under. I look over and I see this nurse peeking her head right into my face and it's the same nurse who was there with my first VBAC. She goes, “You don't have to accept care from him.” She goes, “Your doctor is actually the backup on-call doctor tonight.” She goes, “If you refuse care, we can call her and she can come in.” I was like, “Oh my gosh. This is a miracle.” We get the epidural. I'm like, “We've got to slow this thing down. I don't want to have this baby and have this crazy man who I cannot stand anywhere near my body parts, anywhere in this room.” We get the epidural and everything slowed down. I labored down. My doctor ended up coming in and she checked me. She was like, “Your bag is bulging. It feels like rubber. It's so thick.” She was like, “I think that's why he's not coming out.” We got to the hospital at 9:30-9:45. By the time we got in the room, 11:00 by the time I got the epidural, and the anesthesiologist was like, “You're going to have this baby in 30 minutes. I'm certain of it.” To slow it down, I'm closing my legs and doing all of these things to slow it down.My doctor comes in. She breaks my water and fluid goes everywhere. It floods the floor. She goes, “I don't remember any time I've ever seen this much water come out of someone without polyhydramnios. Maybe you had it. I don't know but this is an insane amount of water.” She breaks my water and then my epidural was a pretty low dose because he thought I was having the baby in 30 minutes. It's now 2:30 in the morning and I haven't had the baby yet. I'm getting up on my knees. I'm leaning over the back of the bed and I feel him descending. Then my doctor comes in an hour later and she's like, “Let's get this baby out.” It was 3:30 in the morning and she's like, “Let's go.” She feels me. She's like, “You're complete. I feel his head right here. You just need to push and you can't feel that his head is right here.” So I just get on my back, in lithotomy with the freaking stirrups like I said I would never do with the epidural I said I would never get and I pushed him out in three pushes. He was 9 pounds, 7 ounces. I am so glad I got that epidural. No regrets there because that's a really freaking huge baby. His head was in the 100th percentile or something like gigantic. I tore a little bit again, but I feel like the tradeoff was this peaceful, happy birth. I was making jokes. I had this nurse that I loved and knew. I had my doctor I loved and knew. I had Katrina and I had my husband who were the only people in the room and we laughed our way into this birth. I laughed my baby out basically. I was making jokes the whole time and I just had this peaceful experience. I told my husband, “I know I railed on the epidural my whole pregnancy and I said I would never get it,” but it's a tool ultimately. It's a tool. If you use it wisely, I was very far along. I said, “I don't think it's going to stop my labor.” I felt really confident in my decision. I didn't feel like anything was pushed on me. I made the decision. I'm happy I did it that way. Would I do it again that way? I don't know. I think with every birth, you should be open-minded to the possibilities and your needs. I hear so many stories where women are like, “And then I got the epidural. I had to.” I'm like, “It's okay. Own that decision. You're no worse off for getting it and it doesn't make you any less of a mom or any less of a good person for getting it. It's okay to not feel every single pain of labor if it's overclouding your ability to be in the moment.” Meagan: Yeah.Lauren: So anyway, that was my second VBAC story. Honestly, it was so redemptive because there was no trauma from the pain of having this wild, chaotic, primal birth. It was just peaceful and happy with all of the people. If I could have dreamt up a list of people who could have been with me, that's who it would have been. Meagan: Good. Oh, I love that you pointed that out. Well, I am so happy for you. Congrats again, 11 days ago and right now I want to thank you again so much for sharing your story. Lauren: Thank you for having me. ClosingWould you like to be a guest on the podcast? Tell us about your experience at thevbaclink.com/share. For more information on all things VBAC including online and in-person VBAC classes, The VBAC Link blog, and Meagan's bio, head over to thevbaclink.com. Congratulations on starting your journey of learning and discovery with The VBAC Link.Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/the-vbac-link/donationsAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands
Amazon sold Echos below cost, hoping for more Alexa shopping. Spoiler: it didn't work. Venmo transactions aren't private, and how your 'digital twin' could save your life. Also, Phil from Indiana isn't happy about his ex-wife FaceTiming their kids at his place.
Ben & Woods kick off the 7am hour continuing to talk about the MLB All-Star game, and whether it's a good or a bad thing that roughly 20% of all of this year's All-Star selections were either current or former Padres / Padres prospects. Then we get to "Don't (And DO) Do This" before we play an impromptu game of "FaceTime Roulette" where the guys take turns FaceTiming random celebrities on the air and seeing who answers... Listen here!
Calista can be seen starring in Ryan Murphy's series FEUD: Capote Vs. The Swans. The second installment of the Feud anthology is based on Capote's Women by Laurence Leamer and focuses on the story of how Truman Capote befriended society women Barbara "Babe" Paley, Gloria Guinness, Marella Agnelli, Slim Hayward, Pamela Churchill, C. Z. Guest, and Jackie Kennedy's sister Lee Radziwill and then betrayed these women for a story. Calista stars as Lee Radziwill, Jackie Kennedy's younger sister and wife of a Polish prince, who developed a strong kinship with Capote thanks in part to her poor relationship with Kennedy. The series also stars Tom Hollander as Capote, Naomi Watts, Chloë Sevigny, Diane Lane and Molly Ringwald. Flockhart made her TV debut portraying the title role in FOX's widely popular and award-winning series “Ally McBeal,” created by David E. Kelley. She also starred in ABC's critically acclaimed TV drama, “Brothers & Sisters,” a family soap revolving around the Walker family and their lives in Los Angeles. Additional TV credits include “Full Circle,” “Supergirl,” Lisa Kudrow's improvisational comedy series on Showtime “Web Therapy,” “Facetiming with Mommy,” and the DreamWorks' TV Series, “The Penguins of Madagascar.” Flockhart returned to her theatre roots as Martha in Who's Afraid of Virgina Woolf for the Geffen Playhouse in Los Angeles. She made her Broadway debut opposite Julie Harris in The Glass Menagerie, for which she received the Theatre World Award and the Clarence Derwent Best New Talent Award. New York theater credits include Neil LaBute's Bash: Latter Day Plays; The Three Sisters; Warren Leight's The Loop, which landed her the role of Gene Hackman's daughter in Mike Nichols' “The Birdcage;” Sophistry; Sons and Fathers; Wrong Turn at Lungfish; All for One and Caryll Churchill's Mad Forest. Flockhart was “Juliet” in Romeo and Juliet at The Hartford Stage; “Cordelia” in King Lear at The Actors Theater in Louisville; “Irina” in The Three Sisters at the Goodman Theater in Chicago; and “Emily” in Our Town directed by the legendary Jose Quintero. Flockhart's film credits include the independent thriller Fragile; Things You Can Tell Just By Looking At Her with Glenn Close and Cameron Diaz; A Midsummer Night's Dream, co-starring Kevin Kline, Michelle Pfeiffer and Rupert Everett; Drunks; The Birdcage, which received the Screen Actors Guild Award for Best Ensemble; and Telling Lies in America co-starring Kevin Bacon and Brad Renfro. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
Calista can be seen starring in Ryan Murphy's series FEUD: Capote Vs. The Swans. The second installment of the Feud anthology is based on Capote's Women by Laurence Leamer and focuses on the story of how Truman Capote befriended society women Barbara "Babe" Paley, Gloria Guinness, Marella Agnelli, Slim Hayward, Pamela Churchill, C. Z. Guest, and Jackie Kennedy's sister Lee Radziwill and then betrayed these women for a story. Calista stars as Lee Radziwill, Jackie Kennedy's younger sister and wife of a Polish prince, who developed a strong kinship with Capote thanks in part to her poor relationship with Kennedy. The series also stars Tom Hollander as Capote, Naomi Watts, Chloë Sevigny, Diane Lane and Molly Ringwald. Flockhart made her TV debut portraying the title role in FOX's widely popular and award-winning series “Ally McBeal,” created by David E. Kelley. She also starred in ABC's critically acclaimed TV drama, “Brothers & Sisters,” a family soap revolving around the Walker family and their lives in Los Angeles. Additional TV credits include “Full Circle,” “Supergirl,” Lisa Kudrow's improvisational comedy series on Showtime “Web Therapy,” “Facetiming with Mommy,” and the DreamWorks' TV Series, “The Penguins of Madagascar.” Flockhart returned to her theatre roots as Martha in Who's Afraid of Virgina Woolf for the Geffen Playhouse in Los Angeles. She made her Broadway debut opposite Julie Harris in The Glass Menagerie, for which she received the Theatre World Award and the Clarence Derwent Best New Talent Award. New York theater credits include Neil LaBute's Bash: Latter Day Plays; The Three Sisters; Warren Leight's The Loop, which landed her the role of Gene Hackman's daughter in Mike Nichols' “The Birdcage;” Sophistry; Sons and Fathers; Wrong Turn at Lungfish; All for One and Caryll Churchill's Mad Forest. Flockhart was “Juliet” in Romeo and Juliet at The Hartford Stage; “Cordelia” in King Lear at The Actors Theater in Louisville; “Irina” in The Three Sisters at the Goodman Theater in Chicago; and “Emily” in Our Town directed by the legendary Jose Quintero. Flockhart's film credits include the independent thriller Fragile; Things You Can Tell Just By Looking At Her with Glenn Close and Cameron Diaz; A Midsummer Night's Dream, co-starring Kevin Kline, Michelle Pfeiffer and Rupert Everett; Drunks; The Birdcage, which received the Screen Actors Guild Award for Best Ensemble; and Telling Lies in America co-starring Kevin Bacon and Brad Renfro. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
This week on Company Lot I investigate the Death Tech Industry, from AI deepfakes to turning your memories into NFTs. Plus, I look into head transplants and think about what Jojo Siwa is up to. Use code LOT10 for 10% off your SeatGeek order https://seatgeek.onelink.me/RrnK/LOT10 $25 max discount COME SEE ME LIVE: https://www.noelmillerlive.com/ MERCH: https://millerfpo.com SUBSCRIBE: https://bit.ly/NoelMillerSub MY TOP VIDEOS: https://bit.ly/NoelMillerTopVideos MY SECOND CHANNEL: https://bit.ly/NoelMillerLive PODCAST: https://tmgstudios.tv INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/thenoelmiller TWITTER: https://www.twitter.com/thenoelmiller TIK TOK: https://www.tiktok.com/@notnoelmiller TWITCH: https://www.twitch.tv/noelmiller BUSINESS: mahzad.babayan@unitedtalent.com Produced by TMG Studios and Noel Miller Chapters: 00:00 Intro 00:12 Welcome Back 01:54 Open AI Whistleblower 09:20 Are We Playing God? 13:29 Head Transplants 18:05 SeatGeek 19:29 Drone Simulators 22:37 Living Forever 25:16 Death Tech 31:55 Trading NFT Memories 33:47 AI Deepfakes of Your Mom 41:57 Cryogenic Freezing 50:30 Cheating Death 55:00 Thanks for Tuning in
Holly was woken up by horny cats last night -- are ALL the animals doing it right now?! Ab Fab: Gwyneth Paltrow's hairy hot dog legs, a new story confirms that people are FaceTiming and speaker phoning in all the wrong places, and Kelly Bensimon cancels her wedding days before the event! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoicesSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
Holly was woken up by horny cats last night -- are ALL the animals doing it right now?! Ab Fab: Gwyneth Paltrow's hairy hot dog legs, a new story confirms that people are FaceTiming and speaker phoning in all the wrong places, and Kelly Bensimon cancels her wedding days before the event! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Emily's first birth experience was a home birth turned hospital transfer which ended in a C-section and then a birth center VBAC ending in hospital transfer and another C-section with her second. She found herself feeling alone, frustrated, and surrounded by people who just didn't get it as she worked to process the trauma and grief of not one but two back-to-back traumatic births and C-sections. Throughout her journey, Emily took charge of what she could, learned about her options, and made the right decisions even when they were disappointing. Emily has been proactive about physical and emotional healing. She has been open to new perspectives. Emily is grateful to share her story and all that she has learned for other mamas who have found themselves in similar situations. And we are so grateful that we can feel of her strength! The VBAC Link Blog: How to Cope When You Don't Get Your VBACThe VBAC Link Blog: Deciding on VBAC vs Repeat CesareanNPR ArticleSpinning Babies: What to Do When...Needed WebsiteHow to VBAC: The Ultimate Prep Course for ParentsFull Transcript under Episode Details 05:02 Review of the Week09:10 Emily's first pregnancy and labor14:59 First C-section17:47 Second pregnancy21:16 Moving and switching providers33:20 Pushing for 5 hours35:45 Transferring37:47 C-section41:29 Tips for adhesions44:20 Hospital births are beautiful49:09 All about transferringMeagan: Hello, everybody. It is Meagan and we have our friend, Emily, with us from Texas today. Hello, Emily. How are you?Emily: I'm good. How are you?Meagan: I am wonderful. I am so wonderful. I love recording these stories if you can't tell. We are producing them a lot because I love recording. I love hearing these stories and sharing these stories. Your story is a CBAC story which I think is so important to share on The VBAC Link Podcast. As technically a CBAC mama myself because I don't know if anybody knows who is listening, but I had a C-section then I wanted a VBAC and had a Cesarean and then I had a vaginal birth. So all over the place. CBAC is really special to my heart and I think that this is such an important topic to share on the podcast because we know that obviously, so many C-sections are happening, right? I also think it's important to know that sometimes even when we are preparing for a VBAC, it might end in a Cesarean birth and even more important, I think it's really important to know that Cesarean births can be healing and are a lot of the times healing. Would you agree with me, Emily? Emily: Yes. I mean, I loved hearing the healing stories. Mine was not and I think that's what I yearned for to her is that I'm not alone and it's okay to have a repeat C-section and I hate calling it a failed VBAC, but a repeat C-section that wasn't wanted and wasn't healing. I mean, my second birth was much more traumatic than my first. I mean, I hate saying traumatic because I have two beautiful, healthy babies, but I also want listeners to know that just because you have a healthy baby and you didn't have serious complications you can't feel what you felt about the trauma of it all. Meagan: Okay, and I love that you point that out too because just as much as Cesarean birth can be healing and can be amazing, it can also have a lot of that trauma. Trauma, I think, is a completely valid word to use. It can be used to be described as traumatic. It can be described as hurtful. I was angry. I was angry when I walked myself down for my second C-section. I didn't want that. That was not what I wanted. It was not what I planned. Yeah. Also, going into that it doesn't always happen the way we want to. It can go both ways so that's why I think sharing CBAC stories on this podcast is so important because we have to learn both sides of things. We have to know that Cesarean birth can be healing and it can be exactly what someone needs and it can also be traumatic and not what someone needs. I think that through these stories and through the journeys, this is how we learn how to try to avoid trauma and anger and hurt along the way. 05:02 Review of the WeekMeagan: Before we get into this story, I do want to read a review. Okay, Emily, so remind me. You had a home birth transfer? Emily: Yes. A home birth transfer C-section and then birth center transfer C-section. Meagan: Birth center transfer C-section, yeah. I also want to talk about transfers at the end. We're going to talk a little bit about transferring and when it might be a good time to transfer, when it might be starting to give us signs that we might not be in the best place, and then also how to go about what to do after you transfer if you're transferring because that can also be a big mess too sometimes transferring depending on how the hospital responds to you. We'll dive in to these stories but I do want to read a Review of the Week. This was from winben18 from Apple Podcasts and it was on May 19, 2023, so a year ago right now. It says, “I had my first baby in 2021 11 pounds at 42 weeks via Cesarean because he wouldn't descend. I was told I couldn't birth him because he was too big and my pelvis was too small, but I always knew that wasn't true. My mother, a very petite woman, birthed me naturally and I was 11 pounds, 9 ounces. In 2023, I had my VBAC with another 11-pound baby. No epidural, 7-hour labor, and I credit that success to The VBAC Link. I started listening to them religiously at 38 weeks when my provider started fearmongering me about birthing a big baby. I needed every little bit of encouragement and The VBAC Link provided that. It's incredible how your body's physical capabilities start with your mindset. Thank you ladies for all of your stories. I wouldn't have been able to do it without you.” Wow, that was an amazing review and so grateful. Holy cow, winben18, yay for an 11-pound, 8-ounce baby. I agree with what she said that it starts with our mindset. A lot of the time it does. We can also be in the best mindset ever and things might not unfold that way but if we can set our mindset and get going and get the education and the empowerment and the encouragement, you never know. Things can go a really long way. So as always, if you guys have a moment, we would love your reviews. You can leave it on Apple Podcasts. You can leave it on Google even or on Spotify. We would love a 5-star review and if you can, comment. Tell us what you guys think. Emily: I love stories of petite women birthing big babies actually because I'm smaller and I had big babies. I'm like, I know I could do it.Meagan: Yes. Yes. She talked about fearmongering. A lot of people do get fearmongered. They start saying, “Oh, I don't really think you can,” and it's so hard when we have a lot of people doubting our own bodies and then we start doubting them even though we didn't have doubt originally. It's so hard. It can be a tough cycle, but Women of Strength, it is possible. 09:10 Emily's first pregnancy and laborMeagan: Okay, Emily. Let's dive into these stories. I know you mentioned in the beginning that you had a second Cesarean and it wasn't amazing. It wasn't amazing, so I would love for you to of course share your stories but also maybe talk about tips you would suggest for someone in your situation maybe looking back where you're like, Oh, I could have done this, or tips for people in your situation. Emily: Okay, so my first son was born in May 2022. I got pregnant with him in September 2021 and I knew immediately that I wanted midwifery care. I wanted a home birth and to be honest, I had no fear. I was very confident. I was like, I can do this. I'm in shape. I eat healthy. There is no reason why this isn't going to go perfectly. I mean, I can't be the only one who has thought that and it was the complete opposite. It was a fine pregnancy. I was very, very sick until about 20 weeks. I lost almost 10 pounds in my first trimester, but it turned out to be a wonderful pregnancy. I love being pregnant. I love it. Anyway, I went into labor at 6:00 AM and I guess active labor really started around noon. We were at home. My husband started filling up the birth pool. My midwife was on the way and she had an assistant midwife with her. So really, we just labored at home. Then I would say probably about early evening, they checked me and I hadn't made very much progress. I think I was at a 4 or a 5 and I'm trying to remember correctly. I think that's when they told me that the baby was at a tilt. Meagan: Asynclitic or the whole body? Emily: You know, I really don't know and I think a lot of it has to do with why I have struggled so much with that birth because I feel like that birth catapulted me into the next C-section, but I feel like they had said anterior tilt, but I don't think that is correct. They broke my water because I wasn't progressing and then they were trying to turn him after the fact. I think that's where things went downhill. They checked me. I wasn't progressing. They were like, “We can break your water. It will speed things up.” And I agreed. I think that was my first mistake. I think a lot of that has to do with me not preparing as well as I should have and me with the mindset of, I can do this, no problem. That is my first regret from my first birth.Anyway, so they broke my water and then after that as everyone knows, contractions were off the wall. They had me laboring in one position on the bed on my left side to try to get him to turn and then they had me on the toilet so I went back and forth between there. Every other contraction, they were in there trying to turn him. So basically, this went on until about 4:00 AM at home. It was my first labor. I was in an extreme amount of pain and I just was exhausted. I felt like it wasn't going like I planned obviously. So anyway, we transferred to the hospital. That was about a 30-minute drive to the hospital which was not fun at all. It was the wee hours of the morning so we went in through the emergency room, got up to triage, and I think I got my epidural within 45 minutes to an hour and just from what I remember, that was a very intense hour. I just remember thinking, What the heck? This is not how childbirth should be. Anyway, so I got my epidural. I labored with an epidural for a few hours and they started me on Pitocin so epidural, Pitocin– Meagan: The usual. Emily: Yeah. Nothing was really happening. They were doing Spinning Babies with the peanut ball and the bed to try to get him positioned better. Long story short, we got to an 8 and this was probably gosh, almost 48 hours later that I got to an 8. The hospital where I birthed is very home-birth and transfer-friendly. I had midwives on staff there who cared for me. One of the midwives home birthed her babies too so that was cool to have her caring for me and understanding my mindset of wanting to birth at home and then obviously I wasn't at home anymore. But regardless, they were saying, my water hadn't broken for over 24 hours. They weren't concerned about that and I loved the evidence-based care there. I love that. But they did tell me, “You know, the way things are going, you could get to a 10. You could push for a couple of hours and end up in an emergency C-section.” It's almost like that verbiage right there was enough for me to be like, “This is it. Let's call it. Let's get the baby out. We want to meet our baby.” We were being surprised on the gender so we were very excited for this baby to get here. I went to 39+5 with him. 14:59 First C-sectionEmily: And so anyway, we called it and we did the C-section. I don't think– obviously the birth was traumatic for reasons like I explained, but the C-section wasn't awful. I didn't feel any tugging. It was a very pleasant Cesarean. They did delayed cord clamping, not traditional delayed clamping, but they waited for it to stop pulsing and cut it. They took him to the table and did all of the hospital things and then wrapped him all up and gave him to me. I was able to do skin-to-skin and nurse while they put me back together. Then they took him off to the nursery. I remember them asking, “Do you want your husband to go with him?” I'm like, “Yes.” I think it was just those little things. Those are the moments and tidbits that I think any mom who has experienced traumatic births thinks back on. I didn't get to touch him right away and I had all of these dreams. I wanted a water birth and my whole pregnancy, I was like, I'm going to pull this baby right up to my chest and nurse him and it's going to be beautiful. When you have that dream and then you get the most extreme opposite, I mean not to the fact that I was under general anesthesia and it was horrible, but in my mind, it was the complete opposite of what I wanted and it sucked. Anyway, so then we go back to recovery and I'm nursing him and everyone who has had a C-section listens to this podcast or most of them. You don't really feel a lot of pain until the second and third day when most everything wears off. It was just hard. It was a hard recovery. It was hard to hold him. He was almost 9 pounds. It was hard holding him. When you nurse a baby, they sit on your belly. It was just hard. I also struggled with vertigo and I got horrible vertigo on my last day at the hospital. I was throwing up which is awful after abdominal surgery and they gave me a pill to stop the vertigo. Then the lactation lady comes in and says, “Oh, that's a level 3 dry-you-up pill.” So then I'm into supply issues and it was just an awful, awful recovery. I hate saying that. I want to be positive, but it just was not fun then on top of that, I was doing triple feeds. I was nursing, then supplementing, and pumping. My milk really didn't come in for 3 weeks. I was very blessed. When it came in, it was in and I got over the dry-up. All in all, it wasn't great. 17:47 Second pregnancyEmily: Anyway, fast forward, I got pregnant 6 months later. It was not planned. I remember taking a shower and I have unscented face soap and I could smell it. I was like, Oh my gosh, no. I took a test and it was positive. The baby was asleep. He was asleep in his bassinet right by my bed and I went to my husband, “I'm pregnant.” My husband, I want to give a shoutout to husbands who are supportive and there. I could not ask for a better partner during labor, during births, and recoveries. He is right there. He is an amazing man, so I want to give a shoutout to him. But yeah, so then I'm pregnant again with a 6-month-old and I knew immediately I wanted to VBAC. I started to look for supportive providers and we were in Austin which you would think Austin has wonderful doctors. It is very progressive in the medical industry, but I was really struggling to find a provider who would accept me. A lot of midwives turned me away. Birth centers turned me away. Meagan: Was that because of the duration or just because you were a VBAC in general? Emily: It was the duration. Meagan: Okay. Emily: I should note that. My babies were 15 months apart. Most of the birth centers want you to be 12 months postpartum by the time you get pregnant and then OB offices are a hit-and-miss, I feel like, with any VBAC. But I found, for anyone who is local to central Texas, I found Austin Doulas I think it was what it was called. I called them and they gave me the name of an OB office. They assured me that all of the OBs on staff were very VBAC-friendly. I contacted them. I should note also that when I found out I was pregnant, I called my first midwife. I was like, “Listen.” I love my midwife. We connected on so many levels. I do think there were things done in labor that shouldn't have happened that catapulted me into the transfer and the C-section, but nonetheless, I loved her. I called her and I was like, “Hey, I would love to do my prenatal care with you and then maybe deliver at the hospital.” This is where my mindset was at the time. She basically told me that yes she could do my prenatal care but I would have to have a planned C-section at 39 weeks. At that point, I was like, Okay. I have learned enough in the little prep I had done in my first birth to know that was not necessary. So I go and she did schedule me for a growth scan because I did not know how far along I was. I ended up being almost 8 weeks pregnant by the time I did the growth scan. Anyway, so then I started my care at the OB office around 12 weeks. They were very supportive. I remember at one of my appointments, they gave me this sheet. It was a VBAC facts sheet and they had you initial every line on every item. It was very much saying that VBAC is safer than a repeat C-section for the right client. I told my husband, “Wow, this is great. I love this.” So we stayed there for a while. I know I shared in my notes I transferred care at 34 weeks. I feel like before I talk about that, I should say that at 6 months pregnant, we moved. 21:16 Moving and switching providersEmily: For anyone listening, unless you have to, I don't recommend that especially with a 10-month-old. I think he was 8 or 9 or 10 months at the time. It was a lot of work, but we were living in Austin. Austin is very busy. We didn't have any family around. Our friends were far. It was a good hour drive from any of our friends so we decided to move back to my husband's hometown where we had friends and family. It was just like we needed to go. As we know, the real estate market was in a really good position. I know it ebbs and flows but at the time, we were like, Now is a good time. Let's just do it.So anyway, we moved. I was 6 months pregnant when we moved and we continued care at my OB office in Austin. I was driving. I would take the baby to his grandma's and then I would drive into town, a 2-hour drive for these appointments. At this point, it felt so difficult for me to find care and we live in a small town. Now after the fact, it's hard to find supportive providers where we are without driving into Houston or Austin. So anyway, around 34 weeks, and this is probably silly on my part, but they stopped calling me a VBAC and started calling me a TOLAC, a trial of labor. Meagan: But they were calling you a VBAC prior. Emily: Yes. Yeah. We got closer and I think also when you've had midwifery care and you go to a traditional OB type of care, it's just worlds different. You get big and big and later and later in your pregnancy and you are hormonal. It was just like, I did not get the warm fuzzies. I was in and out in 5 minutes. I had to ask them to feel the belly to find the baby's positioning. I had a lot of trauma from the first birth about baby positioning. I worked very hard during this pregnancy to make sure I did everything that I could do to make sure this baby was in a good spot internally. So anyway, the appointments weren't great. They started calling me a TOLAC. They started telling me things I couldn't do in labor. They were talking about inductions at a certain time period and scheduled C-sections for X, Y, and Z. I told my husband, “Look, I know this is going to be expensive.” I prayed on it and I was like, I just feel like I need to switch. I should also note that I found this birth center when I was around 30 weeks pregnant and I was always like, Man, I wish I would have found them earlier. But they are extremely VBAC-supportive. For anyone in the Central Texas area, I cannot say more wonderful, amazing things about these women. They are Christian-based, very VBAC supportive, multiple VBAC supportive, wonderful success stories. They do breech births. Meagan: So good to know. Emily: Yeah. In my mind, I'm like, Oh gosh, with my last baby, positioning was hard. I know these women will be able to get this baby out. If the baby flips, I don't have to stress out about a repeat C-section. Blah, blah, blah. So I switched to them at 34 weeks and like I said, it was the most wonderful care. Everything you would want from a midwifery practice. Meagan: What was their group called again? Emily: They're called Dulce Birth and Wellness Center and they are in Killeen which if you are familiar with Texas, it's north of Austin in between Austin and Waco on 35. But yeah. I was driving to that so I was driving an hour and a half to my OB office. I started driving 2 hours to the birth center for appointments. For anyone who is scared to travel in to birth somewhere that you feel fully supported, comfortable, at home, yes it can be difficult, but it is so worth it and even though I didn't get my VBAC, I would have 1000% done it the same way that I did. 27:47 Going into laborEmily: So anyway, I'm with them at 34 weeks and I go into labor at literally 40 weeks on the dot at midnight on my due date. I was like, Wow, this baby is punctual. Meagan: Yeah. Emily: Yeah, so I started contractions around midnight. It wasn't active labor. I was in contact with the midwives throughout the night. Around 10:00 AM the next morning, my contractions were pretty steadily 10 minutes apart. My doula, I also had a VBAC-specific doula who works with the birth center pretty closely. She was turned to my point. I asked her, “Can you just be my point of contact?” She was like, “Yes.” So around 10:00 AM, my contractions were 10 minutes apart and they were like, “I think y'all should head in.” My husband was at a meeting 45 minutes from the house so he came home. We packed up. We had all of the birth center cooler food prepped. I was going to bring some beers for after the birth. I was ready. I was so excited.During this pregnancy, I prepared so much. I had chiropractic care. I had pelvic floor therapy once a week. I was doing the stretching, the exercises. I was doing breathwork. I was on it, on it, on it and I was so excited and I was so ready. I just knew that I could do this. So we drove in. I got adjusted as soon as we got into town because it's a 2-hour drive. We went to the chiropractor and got adjusted. We got a hotel so we could labor at the hotel for a while before we went in. I was talking to my doula and they were all like, “Go out to lunch. Have a good day in the city.” So we ate lunch, checked into the hotel, laid by the pool, went out to dinner, and that was really when we got to dinner. We walked into a Chinese buffet. I don't know why I thought that was a good idea. We got seated and I told my husband, “I can't. They are too intense to eat here.” So we went to a sandwich shop, ate some sandwiches and by the end of dinner, I was like, “Okay, we've got to get back to this hotel.” Things were picking up. They were 5 minutes apart at this point. We got to the hotel. Our doula comes over. Probably within 45 minutes, I was at 3 minutes apart. I remember thinking to myself, Oh my gosh, Emily. You're going to do this. Your labor is picking up. The contractions are how they should be. We packed up our bags. The birth center was 10 minutes away from the hotel and we went to the birth center. I was 3 minutes apart. I walked in and I think they got a new location since then, but regardless, the whole setting was just beautiful. Dimmed lights, we had a big birth suite with the pool, and bathroom. I labored and as soon as I got there, they welcomed me with open arms. They are just the sweetest ladies. Like I said, I would recommend this birth center a million times over to anyone even if you are not trying to VBAC. I labored in the shower for a while. That was nice. I had a birth ball in there. I was doing squats. Like I said, I was in a freaking good mindset. I was ready to have this baby. This baby was a surprise as well so I was excited. A surprise gender I should say. This baby was a surprise all around. So yeah, we labored in the shower for a little while then went back to the birth suite. I was in and out of the pool and the bed just doing whatever felt right which is another big reason that I wanted to switch because if you're birthing in a hospital, you're on a bed especially if you are a VBAC, you're strapped to a monitor. At least that's how they were going to do me. They weren't going to do the intermittent monitoring because of the VBAC.It was just a wonderful laboring experience. Contractions were picking up. They were starting to become not on top of each other yet, but I would say a minute apart. Meagan: They were a minute apart? Holy cow. That's on top of each other. Emily: When I tell my stories, my friends are just like, “Oh my gosh. You're just insane.” I'm like, I can't be the only one who labors like this who has had these types of births. Like I was sharing with you earlier, I just wanted to find similar stories because it's the similar stories that help you work through things in my opinion. So anyway, I got onto the toilet and they had the TENS unit on my back. That was okay. I had heard a lot of women. I listened to a natural birth podcast as well during this pregnancy and a lot of women were like, “The TENS unit was awesome.” Personally, it didn't do anything for me. We went back to the bed. My water broke naturally and that's when it was like contraction, contraction. It was no break at all. I guess I didn't know any of this, but they went and got Trevor, my husband and they were like, “The baby is coming. It's time.” They were like, “Okay, it's time to push.” I pushed forever. 33:20 Pushing for 5 hoursEmily: I was on the birth stool and I just kept pushing it felt like. I'd be like, you know you're in labor and you're unmedicated. You have choice words like, “Where is this baby? What's going on?” I had chosen not to get cervical checks because the last time, cervical checks just really messed with me mentally with progression and everything. Anyway, I was on the birth stool and I was pushing. It was nice. I was on the birth stool with the hanging thing from the ceiling. Meagan: Yeah, like a rebozo. Emily: Yes. Meagan: Were you having the urge to push? How did they feel like you knew?Emily: Yes. Meagan: Okay. Emily: And I'm sorry if my story is sporadic and all. Meagan: No, it's good. This is good. Emily: But yeah, I had the urge to push and I had really done a lot of practice of breathing. You hear these women, “Oh, I breathed my baby out.” Anyway, I was trying to breathe and finally, they were like, “Okay, I think it's time to push,” and I was like, “Okay, thank God. I'm ready.” So I pushed and my husband would tell me after the fact, “I mean, I was so excited. We were going to have this baby at a birth center.” He was like, “I could see this much of her head. She was coming.” Meagan: Oh, okay. Emily: Long story short, I pushed for 5 hours. I decided to get checked because I was like, What the heck is going on? I was fully dilated. I was practically crowning at this point, but she checked me and I had a cervical lip. I hadn't done a lot of research on that. I do know that sometimes they naturally push out of the way, but she had me do some different positions during contractions to get the lip to go away. Then finally, as a last resort, she tried to push it away during contractions and that was just so painful. I just remember it being so painful. I know you're unmedicated and you can feel everything. At that point, I was like, “Just give me the numbers. What are my chances to get this baby out here?” She was like, “Emily, I'm going to give you a 60/40.” At that point, I was like, “I need to transfer.” They were trying to get me to breathe through contractions and to not push because I was so swollen. It was like I couldn't. My body was just doing it and I had no control. 35:45 TransferringEmily: So to speed things up, we transferred to the hospital. It was the same hospital system which I was grateful for. That's St. David's in Austin. My first baby was born at Main. This baby was born at the North hospital, the women's center. They are very holistically minded, as much as you can be at hospitals. That transfer was a 50-minute drive so that was fun. I was like, Here we go again. Let's do this transfer. We busted into triage, guns hot. They knew I was coming. I got my epidural pretty quickly within 30 minutes. They had me push a couple of times then they checked me and they were like, “You're an 8.” I was like, Okay. Here we go again. Meagan: Swollen. Emily: Very swollen. I know I had probably regressed on the drive over just with everything going on. I'm trying to speed my story up so I can get to my thoughts and reflections on it, but basically, I labored at the hospital for a very long time. They started Pitocin. I know I keep saying long story short and it's just a long story, but they came in. The baby's heart rate wasn't doing well. They took my temperature. It was 103. Boom. I had an infection. They gave me Tylenol. It brought the fever down, then around 2:00 AM and this was two days later. I don't know with the timing how to explain it, but they were like, “It's time.” My midwife and my doula who came with me agreed. It was nice that I had that second opinion. I just was so upset. I was crying. My husband was crying just because he knew. I think he just knew how badly I wanted it and how hard we worked. Meagan: Yeah. Emily: Anyway, I met the surgeon and he was wonderful. He was like, “What do you want? I want to make sure this is done right.” He gave us everything we wanted. Delayed cord clamping, my doula was in there. She took photos and everything. 37:47 C-sectionEmily: The C-section wasn't great. I'm glad I had my doula in there. She was a VBA3C mama so she knew her stuff. I'm explaining, “I can feel tugging. I can feel this and that.” She was like, “That's normal.” I didn't feel that with my first C-section.Yeah, they pulled her out. She was a baby girl. She was freaking screaming bloody murder, nothing like my son. My husband had announced both babies. He said, “It's a girl,” and they let me touch her immediately. I just wanted to touch her and this is probably weird, but I feel like moms understand this. I wanted to touch her fresh out, blood and all. That's my baby. I was able to do that and they took her away. I had a really bad infection, chorio. They had to flush my uterus and my abdomen. I was on double antibiotics for three days in the hospital. They were having to– I call it stabbing. They stabbed the baby every day to check on her and it was tough. I had in my mind, “When did this infection start?” I didn't get checked until the very end. I don't know. Yeah. It was hard. When we were in the C-section, he was like, “Who did your last C-section?” In my mind, I'm like, That's a great question, why? “What's wrong?” He was like, “You have really bad adhesions.” He fixed everything up. He came and checked on me the next day. Long story short, I will birth at this hospital again. But it wasn't a healing Cesarean. It was tough. Again, the nursing, the pain. I feel like both times, I really struggled. I'm not saying I didn't bond with my babies, but I think the toughest part of my births were the postpartums. It's such a hard recovery. I feel like people who have never had a C-section before, they don't really understand. I'm not saying that vaginal births aren't difficult to recover from, but it's not full-blown abdominal surgery and then boom, caring for a new life. I couldn't hold the baby like I wanted to. I couldn't do the things I wanted that I dreamt so hard of when I was attempting this VBAC. This mentally was hard because it was like, boom. A double C-section. All I've ever wanted were hands-off, holistic births. That's why I struggled so much with the two C-sections. I don't want to knock anyone. I had very supportive friends and family, but the “at least you have healthy babies”. Yes, I know I am so blessed. I don't want to downplay that because I know a lot of women who don't get that, but it doesn't fix the birth and how awful it was. It was a tough C-section. I had incision issues, but I healed up and I was fine. I started scar work right away. I went to my pelvic floor therapist. She had me doing diaphragmatic breathing. I know I need to wrap up. So to kind of summarize, after my first C-section, I don't think I took the steps necessary to really heal myself with the scar work. I was petrified to touch my scar. I'm sure other people can relate to that. Then I was pregnant and I was like, Well, what's the point? It's stretching out anyway. 41:29 Tips for adhesionsEmily: To any mom who has just had a C-section or is preparing for a VBAC or a birth and you don't know if you are going to have a C-section, that scar work and that internal breathing, that pelvic floor is huge on your recovery. I learned so much about adhesions. Last time, it was the baby positioning. With this next baby, I'm going to be freaking out about adhesions. But yeah, it was tough. So my midwives, bless their hearts. They do a home visit 3 days post-birth. They drove all the way out to where we were to do a home visit. They brought us dinner and my midwife was saying, “Emily, I could not believe that that baby was not flying out of you. You have a great pelvis. Your contractions were so strong. Your pushes were strong. I just could not believe it.” She was like, “I think it was the adhesions.” I had never even heard about adhesions which is silly. Again, prepping on my part, why did I not know about that? But yeah, so that is what they think held her in. It was a baby girl. I don't know if I said that. Meagan: Adhesions, really, that's a really common side effect or I don't really know the right– it happens after a C-section. Sometimes it can happen more and we have really dense or many adhesions and then sometimes people have lower. That's why I love pelvic floor therapy and people like Ask Janette on Instagram because they do talk about that care early on and how important it is early on. So many people like you don't feel comfortable touching their C-section or their scar or they don't like looking at it or have a negative feeling when thinking about it so processing your birth can also help get to that next step of working through those adhesions. Emily: Yeah. I will say my second birth was much, looking back on my first birth, yeah it was kind of traumatic, but this second birth was tough. I was FaceTiming my friend in the hospital afterward just sobbing about the infection. I don't want to put this baby on antibiotics. I'm very holistically minded. The epidural and the Pitocin were a huge blow to me personally. I can't be the only one who feels that way and that has had to have two C-sections. 44:20 Hospital births are beautifulEmily: In summary, I really want to share this with listeners. From my first positive test in September 2021 to now, my views have changed drastically on the hospital system for the better. I didn't have an awful hospital experience. I think the trauma came from the extremities of my situation not getting what I wanted. It might seem selfish, but it's the truth. Anyway, I am very grateful. I am very, very grateful for conventional medicine. I don't know what would have happened with that first baby. He came out looking like he had been in a cage fight just beat up from whatever was going on in there and then my second baby with the infection and then myself, gosh. What a blessing that I didn't go septic. I'm very grateful for conventional medicine. I am grateful for that second C-section even though I am still struggling to process. I didn't want it, but to clean up the adhesions, to clean out the infection and all of that. But yeah, my views have changed drastically. I feel like I should share yes. I attempted a home birth. I don't want to call it failure. I didn't get my home birth. I didn't get my birth center birth. You know, I'm not done having babies. That's why VBAC is so important to me. Also, just pulling your baby out yourself, how cool. I want that so badly. I think I've wanted it from the get-go.My plan is I want to birth again at St. David's, at the women's center. Yeah, I will travel in to do that. I feel like also, I got to the point in my labors where I couldn't hold back pushing. I think it's important to note for any women to weigh your pros and cons of, Do I want to birth in a birth center? For me personally, I don't think that is a good option again. If I'm getting to the point where I can't breathe through contractions and I'm swelling, that's what modern medicine is there for. An epidural can calm you down and maybe get things going back on track. Between that, I told my sister-in-law, “I feel like God is working on my testimony through my births. I feel pulled by Him to share what I have gone through so other people know, yes. You may want a holistic pregnancy, a holistic birth, hands-off, do-it-yourself, midwifery, and that may not be in the cards. That's okay. Don't lose hope in the medical system. There are wonderful OBs. There are wonderful midwives who work in conjunction with hospitals and they know their stuff just as much as the holistic midwife does.” I think going in armed and ready and doing your research, not relying 100% on your provider to save the day is huge. But yeah, I just feel like that's important to note because I know the holistic community, I don't want to call it toxic, but you hear all these things like, “Oh, hospital births are bad. Epidural and Pitocin are so bad,” but it's not bad for everyone. I think that's something that needs to be shifted to where you have holistically minded medicine and conventional medicine working together. I feel like I'm the perfect example of how it didn't go as planned, but my views have changed on that and I am very grateful even though the births– I'm not trying to downplay it. I still struggle to come to terms with why. Why? It all goes back to that first birth. If I could have avoided that first C-section, what could I have done? But I did the best I could with what I knew at the time and what a blessing that I've learned as much as I have since then. I want to share that with other women who want that holistic birth. There's so much that you can be doing during pregnancy to set yourself up better than I did. Anyway, I'm rambling on and on. Meagan: No, you're just fine. The prep is really important and to know how to prep and all of the ways to prep and it's a lot. It's so much. It's so much for someone wanting to have a baby in general and then for VBAC moms, there is definitely this extra thing when it comes to preparing mentally, physically, emotionally, and all of the things. 49:09 All about transferringMeagan: I wanted to touch a little bit on transferring. If you are planning on a home birth or a birth center birth and it comes down to a potential transfer, one, what are some signs that we may need to transfer? For you, it was like, Okay. I just got this percentage. That, to me, was confirmation to transfer. You can have those questions. What are things looking like? Is this going to happen? What can we do? Is there something we can do? Sometimes in that holistic world with home birth and birth center, they may give Benadryl or they may have nitrous to help avoid the urge or whatever. They might have homeopathic stuff, I don't know what your location has, but there are things you can try and then sometimes you are like, I don't know. We're going to go. Or maybe you want epidural relief or baby has been having some nonreassuring heart tones here and there and that's enough to make you want to transfer or for someone to want to transfer you. For first-time moms, I think NPR shares a little article and it says, “For first-time moms choosing home birth, up to 37% transfer to a hospital largely because the baby is unable to come out.” There is a lot of the time within this. I hear this and I'm like, why? Why are we not having babies come out? Sometimes I do feel like we push too early or we don't recognize a positional thing. So a lot of the time when there is a cervical lip, we might have a malpositioned head. I mean, literally ever so slightly that needs some help, but it's hard to know or there may be scarring or there may be something going on causing that lip to stay. Then, it can. It can swell so when people say, “Oh, you can't go backward.” Well, yeah. It can swell. You can get swelling which then closes. So transferring and getting an epidural or getting an epidural at that point even if you're in the hospital is a really great option for a lot of people because they want to avoid that urge to push causing more swelling. You just have to weigh out your pros and cons. They do point out that planned home births end up with fewer Cesareans. 53 births to 1,000 compared to 207 per 1000. This was in 2019. It's been a little bit. We'll include this in the show notes if you want to go give it read, but I think it also comes down to find the best location for you and then follow your heart. I love that you pointed out that hospital birth doesn't have to be bad. It's so true. There are so many beautiful hospital births. I've seen them personally as a doula. They don't have to be traumatic and they don't have to be crazy. Do your research. Find out the locations next to you and around you. I love that you mentioned that you traveled. Traveling is worth it if you find the right provider and right location that's going to help you feel supported and loved and guide you through. I am grateful that you shared both of your Cesarean stories. I am sorry that it didn't happen exactly how you wanted it to. It's so hard when you're like, The why. The why. Why did this happen? What could I have done? It reminds me of Julie's radical acceptance episode. I don't know if you've heard that, but it's so hard to not understand the why or take out the what if, but through these experiences, I think we learn and we grow and sometimes we have to let go of the why. I still don't know some of the why's that happened in my VBAC. It's frustrating and sometimes I find myself latching on and feeling very angry or frustrated or confused. It's so hard to have those feelings, but I think that we grow. We grow as individuals and I can see that you are growing. You also said that you changed perspectives which can be sometimes hard to do so you are. You're growing in the right directions. I hope that for your next births that whatever you decide to do, vaginal or a Cesarean, that they are a healing experience for you. Emily: Yeah. Well, I mean, like I said, I appreciate coming on so much. I just encourage everyone to listen to y'all even if you haven't had a C-section. Knowing what you can do to avoid it from the get-go is huge. Also, I feel like I should say that I found an OB close to where we live and I hear a lot of them say, “Well, if you would have just had a C-section because of a breech baby.” It's the trial of labors that turn people away from the VBA2Cs. “Your two C-sections were–” I already explained them, “and that's why you're not a good candidate for VBA2C.” You all have so many stories on here where people have failure to progress, small pelvis, you're too small, your babies are too big. This, that, or the other I don't feel are good reasons to just not attempt a VBAC if that's what you are wanting to do and that's where I have found myself is I'm trying to figure out what I want to do next because I already know the minute I find out I'm pregnant, people are going to be like, “No. No, no, no.” Meagan: Yeah. That is so hard. That is so hard. We'll include a blog, How to Process When Things Don't Go As Planned. We'll include the blog, Cesarean or VBAC: How to Decide to try and help anyone who is in your same boat and relating to at least have a starting point of how to go and what to do. I just really appreciate you. Congratulations on both of your babies. I am so grateful that you were here today and have a wonderful one. Emily: Thank you. You too.ClosingWould you like to be a guest on the podcast? Tell us about your experience at thevbaclink.com/share. For more information on all things VBAC including online and in-person VBAC classes, The VBAC Link blog, and Meagan's bio, head over to thevbaclink.com. Congratulations on starting your journey of learning and discovery with The VBAC Link.Our Sponsors:* Check out Dr. Mom Butt Balm: drmombuttbalm.comSupport this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/the-vbac-link/donationsAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands
This week for a special May Mural Month episode I decided to bring back an interview from 3 years ago with muralist Pamela Kellough. I remember this being one of my most favorite interviews from 2021. Pamela has such a warmth about her which made talking with her such a delight. She is almost 70 now and still muraling. If anyone has ever tried painting large scale for any amount of time, you'll quickly realize what a physical workout it is. Between being on your feet to unloading gallons of paint and climbing on ladders or even up into a lift. It's tough on the body, which makes me even more impressed that Pamela is doing it with a smile on her face. This lets me know that I'll be doing it until I'm nearing 70 as well! Pamela has a very old-school way of working. There's no iPad for sketches or Facetiming to see the site. She has a sketchbook and does in-person site inspections. I'll let her explain the benefits of those methods, but it just goes to show that you don't need to be techy with the latest tech trends to complete projects in a timely manner. Also, wait until you hear how much Pamela makes vs how much she works. Talk about a motivator to start painting on a large scale. She's such a boss babe and I'm honored to have had her on the podcast. The quality of the audio on this interview is not as good as the interviews I do nowadays, so please excuse and look past that onto the actual content. Pamela has so much advice to give with a lifelong mural career backing her. Let me know what you think of this week's interview with Pamela Kellough. Mural Pricing Training: www.artistacademy.co/pricingguide Mural Supply List: www.artistacademy.co/supply Join us for a Mural Meetup: www.artistacademy.co/meetup
Holmberg's Morning Sickness - Brady Report - Tuesday March 26, 2024 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Author and content creator Drew Afualo (The Comment Section Podcast) joins Whtiney Cummings for a brand new episode of the Good For You Podcast to discuss proper text grammar, FaceTiming with famous friends, the worst male celebrity and more. Big Baby 2024 Tour Tickets Now On Sale: https://bit.ly/3PaFegF Thank you to our sponsors! SHOPIFY: https://www.shopify.com/whitney SHHTAPE: https://www.shh_tape.com code:WHITNEY50 FACTOR: https://www.factormeals.com/whitney50 code WHITNEY50 RITUAL: https://www.ritual.com/whitney 00:00 Welcome To The Show 10:04 That Is A Virgo 19:57 Come See Me Live! 24:00 Texting With Brittany Broski 33:43 You're On My Level 42:41 Fired From The NFL 56:42 Worst Male Celebrity 1:05:09 Do You Lotion? Drew Afualo is a content creator, women's rights advocate, podcast host and author, best known as TikTok's “Crusader for Women”. From her hilariously witty content to her no-BS approach to shoveling misogyny out of the TikTok app via viral takedowns, Drew takes female empowerment to new levels and has established herself as a preeminent feminist leader of her generation with an audience of over nine million of social media. She was named Adweek's 2022 Digital & Tech Creator of the Year, Meta's Creator of Tomorrow, one of Time magazine's Next Generation Leaders, and one of Forbes' Top Creators of 2023. Drew also served as the official red-carpet correspondent at the 2023 Academy Awards and hosts the Spotify-exclusive podcast The Comment Section. Her first book, LOUD: Accept Nothing Less Than the Life You Deserve, will publish July 30th, 2024 via AUWA Books and is available for pre-order now at drew-afualo.com. URL: https://www.drew-afualo.com Socials: TikTok: @drewafualo // IG: @drewafualo // Twitter: @drewafualo1247
We are spilling our hot takes about the Golden Globes and Paige gives us a fashion recap. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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