Podcasts about five invitations

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Can death be portrayed as beautiful? In this episode, we share the joy of talking with Wendy MacNaughton (artist, author, graphic journalist) and Frank Ostaseski (Buddhist teacher, author, founder of the Metta Institute and Zen Hospice Project) about using drawings and images as tools for creating human connections and processing death and dying. You may know Wendy as the talented artist behind Meanwhile in San Francisco or Salt Fat Acid Heat. Our focus today, however, was on her most recently published book titled How to Say Goodbye. This beautiful book began as a very personal project for Wendy while she was the artist-in-residence at Zen Hospice. As BJ MIller writes in the foreword, “May this book be a portal -- a way for us to move beyond the unwise territory of trying to ‘do it right' and into the transcendent terrain of noticing what we can notice, loving who we love, and letting death -- like life --surprise us with its ineffable beauty.” Some highlights from our conversation:   The role of art in humanizing the dying process.  How the act of drawing can help us sloooow down, pay attention to the people and world around us, and ultimately let go…  The possibility of incorporating drawings in research and even clinical care.  The wisdom and experiences of hospice caregivers (who are often underpaid and undervalued). How to use the “Five Things” as a framework for a “conversation of love, respect, and closure” with someone who is dying. And finally, Wendy offers a drawing lesson and ONE-MINUTE drawing assignment to help us (and our listeners) be more present and connect with one another. You can read more about this blind contour exercise from Wendy's DrawTogether Strangers project. The rules are really quite simple:  Find another person. Sit down and draw each other for only one minute. NEVER lift up your pen/pencil (draw with a continuous line)  NEVER look down at your paper That's it! While the creative process is what truly matters, we think that the outcome is guaranteed to be awesome and definitely worth sharing. We invite you to post your drawings on twitter and tag us @GeriPalBlog! Happy listening and drawing, Lingsheng @lingshengli  Additional info:  For weekly lessons on drawing and the art of paying attention from Wendy, you can subscribe to her Substack DrawTogether with WendyMac and join the Grown-Ups Table (GUT)!  To learn more about Frank's teaching and philosophy on end-of-life care, read his book The Five Invitations   

"All the perfections are left in," I say in the intro to this perhaps-greatest-ever episode of the podcast, and yes, I meant "imperfections." But I enjoy the mistake, so it stays in, which is fitting for an episode I've minimally edited so that you can experience it as close to how I did as possible. And fitting for an episode in which legendary experimental/ambient musician and hospice chaplain Jefre Cantu-Ledesma helps me understand in a deep way the meaning of accepting all our feelings about death.Content warning: hospice, the experience of dying, old age, Zen Buddhism, grieving previous versions of yourself, Frank Ostaseski's The Five Invitations, relationship to creative career success, the Five Remembrances.If you believe in This Is Your Afterlife and want fun bonus episodes, become a patron for $5 or $15/month at patreon.com/davemaher. Follow Jefre Cantu-Ledesma on Instagram: @jcantuledesmaListen to and purchase his wonderful, beautiful, mind-blowing, life-affirming music on Bandcamp.Sign on to support the Living Wage for Musicians Act.And donate here to help me raise money for abortion access with Chicago Abortion Fund!Follow this show on IG: @thisisyourafterlife, and get more info at thisisyourafterlife.com. Follow me @thisisdavemaher on Instagram and Twitter.All music by This Is Your Afterlife house band Lake Mary.Check out my other podcast, Genre Reveal Party!, where I analyze TV and movies with my friend, writer and cultural critic Madeline Lane-McKinley.

Renowned Buddhist teacher, Frank Ostaseski, discusses death, impermanence, and the principle of non-waiting.Today's episode was recorded as part of the Ram Dass Fellowship's regular online gatherings. To learn more about the Ram Dass Fellowship and sign up to join a fellowship gathering near you, visit RamDass.org/Fellowship.Today's podcast is sponsored by BetterHelp. Click to receive 10% off your first month with your own licensed professional therapist: betterhelp.com/beherenow Hosted by Jackie Dobrinska, this recording from the Ram Dass Fellowship features Frank Ostaseski discussing:Creation stories and the shaping of humansWhy the breath is so important (Including a guided breath meditation!)The five invitations and how these principles are designed to help you embrace life to the fullestNavigating life transitions, coping with loss, facing serious illness, or personal crisesHeartfelt real-life stories combined with ancient wisdomHow an awareness of mortality can be a supportive companion on the journey to living wellRegarding death as a final stage of growthNot waiting as an antidote to regretThe beauty of life when we recognize and accept impermanenceAbout Frank Ostaseski:Frank Ostaseski, an internationally respected Buddhist teacher and pioneer in end-of-life care, has accompanied over 1,000 people through their dying process. Acclaimed author of The Five Invitations, Frank co-founded the first Buddhist hospice in America—The Zen Hospice Project. In 2005, he founded the Metta Institute, through which he has trained countless clinicians and caregivers, building a national network of educators, advocates, and guides for those facing a life-threatening illness.About Jackie Dobrinska:Jackie Dobrinska is the Director of Education, Community & Inclusion for Ram Dass' Love, Serve, Remember Foundation and the current host of Ram Dass' Here & Now podcast. She is also a teacher, coach, and spiritual director with the privilege of marrying two decades of mystical studies with 15 years of expertise in holistic wellness. As an interspiritual minister, Jackie was ordained in Creation Spirituality in 2016 and has also studied extensively in several other lineages – the plant-medicine-based Pachakuti Mesa Tradition, Sri Vidya Tantra, Western European Shamanism, Christian Mysticism, the Wise Woman Tradition, and others. Today, in addition to building courses and community for LSRF, she leads workshops and coaches individuals to discover, nourish and live from their most authentic selves. Learn more about Jackie's work at asimplevibrantlife.com.“I think when we embrace impermanence a certain grace can enter into our lives. We can treasure experiences, we can feel deeply, all without clinging. We're free to savor and touch the texture of every passing moment.” – Frank OstaseskiSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Dr Nadine Levy is Head of the Health and Social Wellbeing Program at the Nan Tien Institute, a private, not for profit, government accredited higher education provider offering courses in the areas of Buddhist studies, health and wellbeing. Nadine holds a PhD in sociology and Honours degrees in both law and gender studies. She is a committed Buddhist practitioner and is currently completing teacher training in the Insight meditation tradition. As such, she has a particular interest in Buddhist sociology/a sociology of Buddhism and the ways these two paradigms can enliven each another. She is a researcher with several publications, and is particularly interested in translating research for general dissemination and consumption through various news outlets, such as The Guardian. TARGETED PLAYLIST LINK: Compassion in a T-Shirt LINKS: Nadine Levy at the Nan Tien Institute https://www.nantien.edu.au/about-us/faculty-and-staff/nadine-levy/ Articles at The Guardian https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2023/nov/06/try-parenting-the-buddhist-way-drop-your-expectations-and-go-with-the-flow https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2023/sep/11/if-you-want-to-live-a-life-rich-in-meaning-first-you-must-learn-how-to-do-nothing The book Nadine mentions, The Five Invitations by Frank Ostaseski https://fiveinvitations.com/ Say hi on social: Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/drstansteindl Twitter: https://twitter.com/StanSteindl Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dr_stan_steindl/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/stan-steindl-150a5264/ Website: https://www.stansteindl.com/ YouTube Video URL: https://youtu.be/swrzq8rFwe4 *Affiliate Disclaimer: Note this description contains affiliate links that allow you to find the items mentioned in this video and support the channel at no cost to you. While this channel may earn minimal sums when the viewer uses the links, the viewer is in no way obligated to use these links. Thank you for your support! Video hashtags Compassion, self-compassion, Buddhism, Nan Tien Institute, sociology,

Join host Ned Buskirk in conversation with Frank Ostaseski - internationally respected Buddhist teacher, visionary cofounder of the Zen Hospice Project, & founder of the Metta Institute - while they talk about remaining vulnerably present in service of patients, how we should let our tears run instead of hiding them, & moving beyond the idea of a good death.This conversation originally aired July 8th, 2021.frank ostaseski'swebsite: https://frankostaseski.com/ The Five Invitations: https://fiveinvitations.com/FB: https://www.facebook.com/frankostaseski/ Produced by Nick JainaSoundscaping by Nick Jaina”YG2D Podcast Theme Song” by Nick JainaTHIS PODCAST IS MADE POSSIBLE WITH SUPPORT FROM LISTENERS LIKE YOU.Become a podcast patron now at https://www.patreon.com/YG2D.

In this Mindful Monday, Emilía reads a powerful story from Frank Ostaseski's Five Invitations demonstrating the healing power of love."In the horror of my own suffering, I always had held out the hope that one day someone would rescue me. I had imagined that I would be saved by love coming toward me. Just the opposite. I was rescued when love came through me." - Frank Ostaseski

"Death is not waiting for us at the end of a long road. Death is always with us, in the marrow of every passing moment. She is the secret teacher hiding in plain sight, helping us to discover what matters most."   So writes Frank Ostaseski, an internationally respected Buddhist teacher and pioneer in end-of-life care. Frank is the founder of the Zen Hospice Project in San Francisco, the first Buddhist hospice in America. Over the course of his career, Frank has accompanied over 1000 people through the dying process; these experiences have taught him lessons on how maintaining an ever-present consciousness of death can bring us closer to our most authentic selves. He describes these lessons in his bestselling 2017 book, The Five Invitations. In this episode, Frank joins us to share hard-earned wisdom from his unique life journey. Over the course of our deeply reflective and even meditative conversation, we discuss matters ranging from Japanese death poems, to Buddhist mindfulness practices, to what courage looks like in the face of death.In this episode, you will hear about:How the AIDS crisis led to the founding of the Zen Hospice Project - 2:16What Frank's work looks like on a daily basis - 3:52Frank's role as an ‘interpreter' between patients and doctors - 5:57How clinicians can develop their own rituals in the process of healing patients - 9:09How Frank makes sense of the grief and suffering he witnesses and, despite it all, keep his spirit balanced - 13:40How the tenets of Buddhism influenced care at the Zen Hospice Project - 25:58How progresses in modern medicine sometimes hinders us in our acceptance of the impermanence and inevitability of death - 33:56Lessons on love, mindfulness, and finding meaning from Frank's stories of patients at the end of life - 38:20The Five Invitations and what they look like in practice - 45:20Frank Ostaseski is the author of The Five Invitations: Discovering What Death Can Teach Us About Living Fully.Visit our website www.TheDoctorsArt.com where you can find transcripts of all episodes.If you enjoyed this episode, please subscribe, rate, and review our show, available for free on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. If you know of a doctor, patient, or anyone working in health care who would love to explore meaning in medicine with us on the show, feel free to leave a suggestion in the comments or send an email to info@thedoctorsart.com.Copyright The Doctor's Art Podcast 2022

Many Christians today feel stalled or stuck in their Christian life journey. In many cases, these Christians haven't gone any further than weekend attendance at church. But Jesus wants to take us deeper and further in our relationship with Him.  What are five invitations that can bring true transformation and growth in your everyday life, starting today?  

Frank Ostaseski - The Five Invitations Zapraszam do lektury moich książek: Autoterapia. Napraw sobie życie https://www.fundacjahs.org/sklep/autoterapia/ Nie daj sobie wejść na głowę https://sensus.pl/view/14859A/niedaj.htm Nie daj sobie spieprzyć życia. Sposoby na toksycznych ludzi https://sensus.pl/viewc/14859A/3/toklud Psychopata w pracy, w rodzinie i wśród znajomych: https://sensus.pl/viewc/14859A/1/psywpr.htm Totem. Jak zbudować poczucie własnej wartości: https://sensus.pl/viewc/14859A/1/totemj.htm Święty spokój. Instrukcja obsługi emocji: https://sensus.pl/viewc/14859A/1/swiety.htm Życie. Następny poziom: https://sensus.pl/viewc/14859A/1/zycie2.htm Alchemia duchowego rozwoju: https://sensus.pl/viewc/14859A/1/aldurv.htm Mantra ciszy. 7 reguł duchowej ścieżki: https://sensus.pl/viewc/14859A/1/7regdu.htm Motocyklizm. Droga do mindfulness: https://sensus.pl/viewc/14859A/1/motozy.htm Pokonaj stres z Kaizen: https://sensus.pl/viewc/14859A/1/pokosk.htm Schudnij z Kaizen: https://sensus.pl/viewc/14859A/1/pokoty.htm Model transpersonalny https://www.fundacjahs.org/sklep/model_transpersonalny-ebook/ Oferta moich szkoleń video: Zarządzanie emocjami: https://bit.ly/2IFmNOE Re-konstrukcja relacji: https://bit.ly/31Kl1FU Mindfulness: https://bit.ly/3bU5iHb Sztuka komunikacji: https://bit.ly/3eLJIpm Jak pokonać stres?: https://bit.ly/2VwL4ff Poziomy świadomości: https://bit.ly/3x0sw85 Motywacja: https://bit.ly/3Aa3Njc Oferta moich otwartych szkoleń i warsztatów: Zarządzanie emocjami: https://bit.ly/2oH5QJj Warsztaty medytacyjne: http://bit.ly/2AJHJ4I Akademia terapii transpersonalnej: https://bit.ly/2Vz7zAa Opis metody, której uczę i w której pracuję: Model transpersonalny: https://bit.ly/2OCI4wr Informacje na temat sesji indywidualnej: https://bit.ly/33kQkVL Realizacja video mini-wykładów jest możliwa dzięki środkom i zasobom Fundacji Hinc Sapientia https://www.fundacjahs.org. Jeśli uważasz, że publikowane tutaj mini-wykłady są przydatne i warto kontynuować ich produkcję to możesz ją wesprzeć darowizną na cele statutowe fundacji (wpłaty z pośrednictwem płatności on-line już od 10 zł) https://bit.ly/2nB1Tci Dziękuję:-) Jarosław Gibas

Frank Ostaseski is a Buddhist teacher and a pioneer and leader in the field of end of life care. “I don't know exactly how we prepare for dying. I know that we can use the spectre of death as a way to show us how to live our life really fully. And that may be the best preparation for dying, a life fully lived.”Frank founded the first Zen hospice project in 1987, and guided that for almost 20 years, and subsequently then founded The Metta Institute, where he's trained hundreds of people in end of life care. “Knowing that the people we love will die reminds us how we want to care for them. Now, how do we want to attend to this relationship? It's not to scare us. It's to encourage us to recognize what it is that matters most.”In today's episode, Frank shares his journey from the beginning of his spiritual practice, to founding the San Francisco based Zen center, why you need to focus rather than seek, the beauty of a wonder walk, the value of listening, being comfortable in our vulnerability, our immense capacity for love, and why we shouldn't wait until we die to learn the lessons that death has to teach us. “The very process of dying is actually conducive to our waking up… People often discover something about themselves that they didn't know before. And this isn't because of some religious or even spiritual practice. It's because they came in contact with something true about themselves.”On today's podcast: What is it that brings us to spiritual practice? The beauty of a wonder walk When dealing with death, lead with humanity The value of listening Love people until they can love themselves again Have the courage to be vulnerable Links: The Five invitations @fostaseski Book - The Five Invitations

Today Rev. Wendy ends her series on "The Five Invitations," by sharing about cultivating a don't know mind. Website: http://www.theunitycenter.net Ask Yourself This: https://www.amazon.com/Ask-Yourself-This-Questions-Expand/dp/087159336X Get our free App! THE UNITY CENTER: https://apps.apple.com/us/app/the-unity-center/id1165626651 Subscribe to our YouTube channel: http://bit.ly/2hBqp7F Listen to our Podcast: https://open.spotify.com/show/6YJWcAhQUnkEHFqBXQmz1G

This talk references teachings from the writings of Carlos Castaneda and material from the book The Five Invitations by Frank Ostaseski. Holding on to things goes against nature since everything ends. In our culture, we seek to have death affect us as little as possible. Another option is to look at and show up for death when it crosses our path so that it informs our lives. If we push death away, transformation is not possible. Suzuki Roshi said, “We die, and we do not die.” How are we to understand this? On one level we are terrified of death and on another we encourage it. We can practice with little deaths, with accepting what is, relaxing ego, and acting as needed every day. Stories are recounted which illustrate the five invitations: don't wait, welcome everything, bring your whole self, find a place of rest in the middle of things, and cultivate don't know mind. Any consideration about avoiding dying raises the consideration of avoiding living. Our problem is that we think we have time. Are we holding on to something which keeps us from forgiving? How do we hold back from giving our whole self to life? Through loss, feelings of love become transformative. When we surrender to grief, we learn to give ourselves to life. People who are dying offer us a great gift. It's too important to wait until the last moment to contemplate the mystery of death. VJ is the organizer of the Western Baul Podcast Series and author of Shadow on the Path and Father and Son.

Rev. Wendy continues her series on "The Five Invitations," by sharing about finding a place to rest in the middle of your chaotic life. Website: http://www.theunitycenter.net Ask Yourself This: https://www.amazon.com/Ask-Yourself-This-Questions-Expand/dp/087159336X Get our free App! THE UNITY CENTER: https://apps.apple.com/us/app/the-unity-center/id1165626651 Subscribe to our YouTube channel: http://bit.ly/2hBqp7F Listen to our Podcast: https://open.spotify.com/show/6YJWcAhQUnkEHFqBXQmz1G

Rev. Wendy continues her series on "The Five Invitations," by sharing about bringing your whole self to your life. Website: http://www.theunitycenter.net Ask Yourself This: https://www.amazon.com/Ask-Yourself-This-Questions-Expand/dp/087159336X Get our free App! THE UNITY CENTER: https://apps.apple.com/us/app/the-unity-center/id1165626651 Subscribe to our YouTube channel: http://bit.ly/2hBqp7F Listen to our Podcast: https://open.spotify.com/show/6YJWcAhQUnkEHFqBXQmz1G

Rev. Wendy continues her series on "The Five Invitations," by sharing about "Welcome Everything; Push Nothing Away." Website: http://www.theunitycenter.net Ask Yourself This: https://www.amazon.com/Ask-Yourself-This-Questions-Expand/dp/087159336X Get our free App! THE UNITY CENTER: https://apps.apple.com/us/app/the-unity-center/id1165626651 Subscribe to our YouTube channel: http://bit.ly/2hBqp7F Listen to our Podcast: https://open.spotify.com/show/6YJWcAhQUnkEHFqBXQmz1G

Rev. Wendy starts her series on "The Five Invitations" by Frank Ostaseski today, by talking about impermanence. Website: http://www.theunitycenter.net Ask Yourself This: https://www.amazon.com/Ask-Yourself-This-Questions-Expand/dp/087159336X Get our free App! THE UNITY CENTER: https://apps.apple.com/us/app/the-unity-center/id1165626651 Subscribe to our YouTube channel: http://bit.ly/2hBqp7F Listen to our Podcast: https://open.spotify.com/show/6YJWcAhQUnkEHFqBXQmz1G

The inner critic and its disappearance in the face of unconditional love. Sources: Zen Bow article by Wes Borden, Summer 2018, The Five Invitations by Frank Ostaseski Automated transcript https://otter.ai/u/JEuFooEDCqRUya7RlBIEXCr18iA

Happy new year and welcome to CancerTalks season 2! Our guest today is Ricki Pollycove, a doctor who founded San Francisco Integrative Gynecology with a commitment to listening carefully to women's health concerns, mood issues, and past experiences with health care. She is a mother and now a grandmother of two little girls. Ricki's Reading List:  1. Just Diagnosed by Arlene Marie Karole 2. Peace is Every Step and The Art of Living by Thich Nhat Hanh 3. Into the Magic Shop by Jim Doty 4. The Five Invitations by Frank Ostaseski 5. Who Dies?: An Investigation of Conscious Living and Conscious Dying by Stephen and Ondrea Levine 6. Goddesses in Everywoman by Jean Shinoda Bolen  7. The Wounded Healer by Linda Leonards 8. Drama of the Gifted Child by Alice Miller CancerTalks is an inter-dependent community project with a production team of three and we count on your contributions. We'd like to thank Barbara Striebel for her generous contribution. To support us starting at $5 a month, or to make a larger tax-deductible contribution, visit Patreon.com/cancertalks. If you enjoyed this conversation please leave a review in your podcast app. CancerTalks is a platform for anyone who has been touched by cancer. If you'd like to be in community with other cancer thrivers seeking personal transformation join us on Zoom for community workshops. Visit cancertalks.com/zoom to register for the next one.

This month Scott and Kailey talk about our favorite spiritual tv shows, book, podcasts, and musicians!    Follow us on Instagram @Fartheroutfriends Send us an email: fartheroutfriends@gmail.com Or listen on Apple Podcast!     7:43- Ram Dass Here and Now Podcast   12:41:27- Women Who Run With the Wolves by Clarissa Pinkola Estés   13;02;07 - Boundary Boss by Terri Cole MSW LCSW   15;02;26 - Necessary Losses by Judith Viorst    17;21;08 - A Grief Observed by C.S. Lewis   18;14;21 - Many Lives Many Masters by Brian Weiss   19;22;27 - Only Love is Real by Brian Weiss   21;04;13 - The Five Invitations by Frank Ostaseki    23;53;17 - The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz   26;05;08 The Yamas and The Niyamas by Deborah Adele   27;33;04- The Midnight Gospel (TV SHOW)   29;08;26 - Leonard Cohen (MUSICIAN)   30;18;17 - Surviving Death (TV SHOW)   30;30;18 - Th OA (TV SHOW)

How it helps to tell our stories - Positive Recovery with Corinna This week Corinna looks at how it helps to tell our stories. We need to start at the beginning to find a happy ending. Podcast includes extracts from The Five Invitations by Frank Ostaseski describing how memory is malleable.  We all have a story to tell, and in so doing, it helps us to heal.  If you would like to follow my Positive living with sobriety and disability, and tour the Uk with me, then come follow me on Instagram @canamgirluk

To find out more about Frank Ostaseski & to contribute to the Metta Institute visit: https://www.mettainstitute.org/Check out Frank's book The Five Invitations: https://fiveinvitations.com/ Produced by Nick JainaSoundscaping by Nick Jaina“Chelsea in Triplicate” by Chelsea Coleman & Nick Jaina”YG2D Podcast Theme Song” Produced by Scott Ferreter & eO w/vocals by Jordan Edelheit, Morgan Bolender, Chelsea Coleman & Ned BuskirkTHIS PODCAST IS MADE POSSIBLEWITH SUPPORT FROM THE LOST CHURCH [https://www.thelostchurch.com/] & BECAUSE OF LISTENERS LIKE YOU.Become a podcast patron now at https://www.patreon.com/YG2D.And find out more at www.yg2d.com

"How can I help??" It's a question that a lot of us spend time trying to answer. Sarah invites us to consider the answer to this question begins by turning inward. When we spend time first on deepening our understanding of a person and a situation before we go to fix, help, save, or plan, our approach can be more empathetic and effective. In this podcast she offers five simple ways to dig deeper, ask critical questions, and get curious about ourselves -- before jumping to strategies or tools.

In this episode, Jen and Sarah Jane talk about the concept of precious impermanence, an organizing principle for many Asian religions and belief systems.Impermanence dignifies the transient nature of reality. Clinging to things as if they could be permanent is what causes unnecessary suffering in life. Through Buddhist, yogic, and Taoist textual references and stories, Sarah Jane and Jen demonstrate the value of seeing the world as ever-changing and uncertain. Not only is it realistic, but it compels us to live meaningfully, passionately, now.~~~Books Find the following books in your  local Black-owned bookstore:"Training in Compassion: Zen Teachings on the Practice of Lojong" by Norman Fischer"Start Where You Are: A Guide to Compassionate Living" by Pema Chödrön“The Five Invitations” by Frank Ostaseski“A Year to Live” by Stephen Levine“The Trauma of Everyday Life” by Mark Epstein. "The World We Have: A Buddhist Approach to Peace & Ecology" by Thich Nhat Hanh"The Next in the Stream: Lessons from Nature on Being with Pain" by Micheal Kearney, MD.Online ProgramsA Year to Live course at Spirit Rock. You can also find it at InsightLA and other centers, usually offered at the beginning of a calendar year.  Mortal with Alua Arthur (end-of-life doula, attorney, professor, and minister) and Caitlin Doughty (mortician and author). This course helps people meet their fear of death.Sarah Jane is an end-of-life educator and doula, focusing on mindfulness practice for presence, peace, and purpose. She offers Death Cafes and a mini-course she calls Mindful Approaches to End-of-Life Matters. For more information, go to www.sarahjaneshangraw.com. ~~~May Dharma Book ClubStart reading the Tao te Ching and send in your insights and questions by May 1 to be included in our next episode.~~~You can find us on  Facebook and Instagram. We also welcome your messages at feedback@skillfulmeanspodcast.com or in our voicemail box on SpeakPipe.You can also get in touch with Jen and Sarah Jane directly. Don't forget! You can also practice with us live each week: https://www.sati.yoga/practice/virtualclasses.html

Frank is a leading voice in contemplative end-of-life care and Richard has been blessed by his insights.

This is the last of a three-part series where we explore Frank Ostaseski's book The Five Invitations: Discovering What Death Can Teach the Living.  Frank helped found the Zen Hospice Project's Guest House. Through his work with hospice patients, he felt that “When we come close to the end of our life, what's really important makes itself known.”   In this episode we talk about the importance of Find a Place of Rest in the Middle of Things, and Cultivate a Don't Know Mind.

Openness is the basis for a skillful response of life.  When we're open and receptive, we have options.  In this episode we continue our discussion from Frank Ostaseski's book and the invitations of “Welcome Everything, Push Away Nothing” and “Bring Your Whole Self To the Experience”. 

Life and death go together.  Everyone is born, and everyone dies.  We can't truly live unless are aware of death.  What can we learn from those at the end of life?  We explore Frank Ostaseski's book The Five Invitations: Discovering What Death Can Teach the Living in this three-part series.

We saved the best for last. Frank Ostaseski is the co-founder of the Zen Hospice Project in San Francisco and the Metta Institute. He's the author of the best selling book "The Five Invitations" and his thoughts on death and dying will change your life. Support the show (https://www.endinmindproject.org/invest/)

Frank Ostaseski is an internationally respected Buddhist teacher and visionary co-founder of the Zen Hospice Project. His groundbreaking work has been featured on The Oprah Winfrey Show, and he has been honoured by H.H. the Dalai Lama. In this episode we discuss his life of service and action and his inspirational book, 'The Five Invitations: Discovering What Death Can Teach Us About Living Fully.'

Frank Ostaseski on what death can teach us about living fully. Frank's website, The Five Invitations, is here.

WE’RE BACK for SEASON TWO…. IT’S DONE FOR! EPISODE 1: This season, we've selected the book The Five Invitations by Frank Ostaseski. We jump right into episode 1 with the first Invitation: Don’t Wait. We’ll continue to circle back to our foundational questions: 1) What leads to a good death? and 2) What does that tell us about how to live a good life? Listen in as we continue the conversation, and tell us how you’re answering these questions. If you like this, tell someone! Please help us out by sharing it and spreading the conversation. RESOURCES: The Five Invitations (Flatiron Books, 2017) by Frank Ostaseski. Frank Ostaseski is an internationally respected Buddhist teacher and visionary cofounder of the Zen Hospice Project, and founder of the Metta Institute. He has lectured at Harvard Medical School, the Mayo Clinic, Wisdom.2.0 and teaches at major spiritual centers around the globe. Frank is the 2018 recipient of the prestigious Humanities Award from the American Academy of Hospice and Palliative Medicine. Frank's groundbreaking work has been featured on the Bill Moyers PBS series On Our Own Terms, highlighted on The Oprah Winfrey Show, and honored by H.H. the Dalai Lama. He is the author of The Five Invitations: Discovering What Death Can Teach Us About Living Fully. The Chaplaincy Institute in Berkeley, CA is where the 3 of us met and began to share our stories. The Chaplaincy Institute is an Interfaith Community and Seminary that strives to create a just world that honors the sacred connection of all. Find out more at www.chaplaincyinstitute.org. “Churchianity” was actually a term Jessica first learned from the Rev. Dr Megan Wagner. ProgressiveChristianity.org is a global resource of open, intelligent, and collaborative approaches to the Christian tradition and the life and teachings of Jesus that creates a pathway into an authentic and relevant religious experience. Shower the People, James Taylor (June 1976) It turns out Jessica is way better at this than even she thought! Well, with the exception of re-writing this James Taylor classic with new words. Fundamentalism: despite the first three letters indicating an emphasis on ‘fun’, fundamentalism in many forms (religious and non-religious) can be damaging. We hope if you’ve experienced that kind of trauma, that you will share your story and continue to listen. Book Club Questions: One of our dear listeners (and Jessica’s BFF) wrote a guide for this season. Find it here: (link to pdf attached) Also, it turns out Frank has developed a guide that can be found at: fiveinvitations.com/book-club Atlas: The Atlas personality, drawing on the myth of the giant Atlas from Greek mythology upholding the world, is someone obliged to take on adult responsibilities prematurely. They are thus liable to develop a pattern of compulsive caregiving in later life. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Atlas_personality Female Playwrights: yeah, there are a lot of these David. Take your pick… an ditch the white dudes. Annie Baker, Lisa D’Amour, Sarah DeLappe, Margaret Edson, Liz Flahive, Amy Freed, Madeleine George, Rebecca Gilman, Gina Gionfriddo, DW Gregory, Danai Gurira, Leslye Headland, Amy Herzog, Quiara Alegria Hudes, Lucy Kirkwood, Young Jean Lee, Jennifer Maisel, Martyna Majok, Lynn Nottage, Antoinette Nwandu, Suzan-Lori Parks, Theresa Rebeck, Yasmina Reza, Sarah Ruhl, Laura Shamas, Lisa B Thompson, Lucy Thurber, Joyce VanDyke, Paula Vogel, Anne Washburn. Thanks to theatrenerds.com Anne Lammott first used the phrase “shitty first drafts” in her book Bird by Bird (1995) to emphasize why perfectionism can kill creativity. Learn more about Andrew Chirch, David Greenson, and Jessica Shine at DoneForPodcast.com

The Heart of Hospice was thrilled to talk with Frank Ostaseski, a pioneer in end of life care.  According to his bio on the Metta Institute Website, https://www.mettainstitute.org/Fbio.html, Frank co-founded the Zen Hospice Project, the first Buddhist hospice in America, in 1987.  “He guided that groundbreaking work for almost 20 years establishing a longstanding model for mindful and compassionate care.  In 2005, he founded the Metta Institute, training countless healthcare clinicians and caregivers and building a national network of educators, advocates, and guides for those facing life-threatening illness.”  Frank shared his wisdom and experience with Jerry and Helen during his wonderful interview.   In this interview Frank explains the purpose behind his book, The Five Invitations: Discovering What Death Can Teach Us About Living Fully.  The Five Invitations can best be understood as best practices for anyone navigating a life transition.  To learn more about this powerful and inspiring book, visit the website www.fiveinvitations.com You can read more about the mission of The Heart of Hospice, and how we got started at theheartofhospice.com.  You'll find information on self care, advance care planning, and support for personal and professional caregivers.  Remember, you are The Heart of Hospice!

Frank Ostaseski has noticed that we as a society obsess about death. We spend a great deal of time trying to prepare for it and hope that we are “ready” for it when the time comes. But according to him, the best way to prepare for death is by living your life the best way you possibly can. Listen as Frank details how simply waiting on the dying of our loved one and ourselves makes us miss all the moments in between.Frank Ostaseski is a Buddhist teacher, international lecturer and a leading voice in contemplative end-of-life care. In 1987, he co-founded of the Zen Hospice Project, the first Buddhist hospice in America. In 2004, he created the Metta Institute to provide innovative educational programs and professional trainings that foster compassionate, mindfulness-based care. He's also the author of The Five Invitations See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

SHOW NOTES: This week we wrap up Season 1 with our reflections and lessons learned. And we share a few warm fuzzies, so bring the kleenex! Stay tuned for a sneak peak into Season 2. RESOURCES: Dr. Elisabeth Kübler-Ross, On Death and Dying: What the Dying Have to Teach Doctors, Nurses, Clergy and Their Own Families (New York: Scribner, 1969). Ostaseski, Frank, The Five Invitations (Flatiron Books, 2017).

SHOW NOTES: This week we continue into the five stages offered by Dr. Elizabeth Kubler-Ross, namely Anger. Is anger ever ok? Is it helpful? Our template consists of two basic questions: 1) what leads to a good death? and 2) what leads to a good life? Listen in as we discuss this stage of death and dying. RESOURCES: Kübler-Ross, Dr. Elisabeth, On Death and Dying: What the Dying Have to Teach Doctors, Nurses, Clergy and Their Own Families (New York: Scribner, 1969). Thomas, Dylan, Do Not Go Gentle Into That Good Night, (1947). Tai chi (taiji), short for T'ai chi ch'üan, or Taijiquan (pinyin: tàijíquán; 太极拳), is an internalChinese martial art practiced for both its defense training and its health benefits. It’s also a philosophy of the forces of yin and yang. (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tai_chi)   Kali is the Hindu goddess of death or deliverance, and one of Andy's all-time favorite people.  https://www.ancient.eu/Kali/   Jesus’ anger materializes in the story of him overturning tables in temple, as recorded in the Christian sacred texts of Matthew 21:12-13 and Mark 11:15-18.   Need an Interfaith Chaplain? You can find a few of our favorites by clicking on the Providers tab at www.chaplaincyinstitute.org.   Tori DeAngelis, Cover Story, www.apa.org, http://www.apa.org/monitor/mar03/whenanger.aspx, 2003. Inside Out. Directed by Pete Docter.  Walt Disney Studios Motion Pictures, 2015. The Black Lives Matter Global Network is a chapter-based, member-led organization whose mission is to build local power and to intervene in violence inflicted on Black communities by the state and vigilantes. (https://blacklivesmatter.com/about/) The Five Invitations (2017) by Frank Ostaseski will be the focus of Season 2 of Done For. If you’ve already got this, yay for you.   Learn more about Andrew Chirch, David Greenson, and Jessica Shine DoneForPodcast.com/about

We're smart people living within a knowledge-based economy. So much encourages to acquire knowledge and use it well. It is counter-cultural, maybe even counter-intuitive, to not only accept our ignorance but cultivate our not-knowing. But that is what Buddhist teacher Frank Ostaseski encourages us to do. This is the fifth of the series “Five Invitations.” Music: Brocelïande; Celtic and Early Music Ensemble

Frank Ostaseski knows death. Not in a metaphorical or figurative way, but through concrete presence. Frank has held hands, laughed with, cried with and learned from those who were welcomed in the doors of the Zen Hospice Project during their final days on the planet. As you will soon find out, he honors them through magnanimous storytelling and wisdom from the depths of experience. Frank is a sought-after Buddhist teacher who co-founded the Zen Hospice Project in 1987 and founder of the Metta Institute in 2005 to train countless healthcare clinicians and caregivers and building a national network of educators, advocates and guides for those facing life-threatening illness. If that weren’t enough, he’s been highlighted by Oprah Winfrey, Bill Moyers and H.H. the Dalai Lama. And Frank was gracious enough to share his teachings and presence with us on Contemplify. Using his life-altering book, The Five Invitations: Discovering What Death Can Teach Us About Living Fully, as a launchpad we delve into Frank’s story, his mentor Stephen Levine, the power of the five invitations themselves, how those facing death became his greatest teachers, what he learned from the monsters in his son’s closest and so much more. Buy the book, read this book (if you’re in a book club, consider delving into it and using these discussion questions). You can learn more about Frank at fiveinvitations.com or follow him on Twitter (@fostaseski) or Facebook (@frankostaseski).

Understanding death is essential to understand life. It helps us to live a more meaningful and happy life. On this episode, we are here with Frank Ostaseski. He’s an internationally respected Buddhist teacher, a visionary, and the founder of Metta Institute. Frank shares with us the Five Invitations or the lessons that he learned from being with people who are dying. Those invitations can be practiced to live our lives fully. Keeping death at our fingertips reminds us not to hold on to things too tightly and to let go of fixed ideas which allows us to enter life with fresh eyes. Get all the resources for this episode and listen to more at https://www.thrivinglaunch.com

Dr. Martha Jo Atkins researches and teaches about the language, movement, and visions most people experience at the end of life. She is the executive director of Abode Contemplative Care for the Dying in San Antonio, Texas. We talk a lot on this podcast about what happens after you die, what’s going on on the other side of the veil. Martha Jo has dedicated her career to standing just on this side of the veil, making the transition better for others, observing the phenomena, and teaching us all how to better navigate the sign posts of dying for our loved ones. WE TALK ABOUT: the mystical sign posts along the process of dying pre-death visions — do they happen for everyone how the conversations we have in the room where someone is dying can help or hinder their transition MENTIONED ON THE SHOW: Signposts of Dying by Marth Jo Atkins, PhD The Five Invitations: Discovering What Death Can Teach Us About Living Fully by Frank Ostaseski When Breath Becomes Air by Paul Kalanithi & Abraham Verghese Paula by Isabel Allende The Nine Elements of Near-Death Experience by Dr. Raymond Moody GUEST LINKS - Martha Jo Atkins MarthaAtkins.com Abode Contemplative Care for the Dying HOST LINKS - SLADE ROBERSON Slade's Books & Courses Get an intuitive reading with Slade Automatic Intuition BECOME A PATRON https://www.patreon.com/shiftyourspirits Edit your pledge on Patreon TRANSCRIPT Martha Jo: My name is Martha Jo Atkins. I am a death and dying educator, counselor, and presently, I am the executive director of Abode Contemplative Care for the Dying in San Antonio. We take care of people who are in the last three months of life, and help them transition from here to there, and it's a really pretty magical place. So I do private practice and that stuff and teach about preparing for end of life questions to ask yourself, things to talk to your family about, that kind of stuff. Big fun. Slade: Well we'll get to how you manage the fun of all of that in a minute. But I am curious to hear more about Abode Contemplative Care for the Dying. Would you talk a little bit more about that and maybe explain how is it different than other forms of hospice care? Martha Jo: Yeah, so Abode was started by a guy named Edwin Sasek, who studied at the Kubler-Ross Centre back in the 80s, which was in New Mexico, and Edwin learned about the monasteries in the 14th and 15th centuries, where dying people, travelling people who were dying, would go to the monasteries and the men in the monasteries would give them the best of what they had. So the best food, the best mat, the best whatever they had to help them travel on their next journey. And Edwin had this dream of starting a place where there was a chair, and a mat, and a light bulb, and somebody could sit with somebody who was dying and help them go. He didn't have a model for that and some 20 years later, he met a classmate of his who had been at the Kubler-Ross Institute too, who was running a non-profit home in Michigan I believe, where he was caring for dying people. And Edwin put together a group. He had a model, he has that kind of energy that has, invites people to follow, and a group of people put Abode together and it's built on contemplative practices. So mostly about presence. So how do you bring your spiritual practices to bear in every day life, and he invites people to do that in context, in this place, in this community. Helping people with their dying process. So we got three people who come at a time. They're in the last three months. We go and visit them and make sure that this is the right place for them. All the people who are coming to us recognize that they're dying. They don't necessarily like it, but they understand that that's what's happening. And then we accompany them. Walk alongside them as they're on their journey. Right now, we're not charging a fee for that. I think that's going to be changing in the springtime, just because economics are the way they are and we need to be able to support ourselves. So we'll charge something, and also have financial aid for people. Edwin's dream was for this to be for people who couldn't pay and for us to be able to care for those people and we still will do that and we will care for other people who can pay and that will allow us to keep the cycle going of helping people who need it. Slade: Mmm... that sounds wonderful. Martha Jo: Yeah, it's a pretty magical place. And the question you ask was how it's different. It is not a hospice. Hospices in our country, it's a benefit of insurance, it's a benefit of medicare and medicaid, and there's a number of days that you can be on hospice, you get a doctor and a nurse and a social worker, a chaplain and an aid that will come to your home for short amounts of time, 30 minutes to a couple of hours and care for you, and the rest of the time, your family or friends are the ones who care for you. And so we take care of those people who are in the gap. We don't get money from hospices or from medicare or from insurance. That money all goes to the hospices. The hospices refer someone to us and we are simply a home. We serve as extended family. Slade: So you guys fill in the gaps for someoneo who maybe doesn't have those family members present. Martha Jo: Right. Somebody who's 90 and their spouse is 90 and they've been married for 70 years and he can't turn her. And he doesn't understand what's happening. Or recently, we had a 26 year old who didn't want to die at home. Who had a 4-year old and an 8-month old, and was worried about her mother. So we had, at one point in the room, there were four generations in this room helping this woman say goodbye to this life, and we got to be a part of all that and facilitate some opportunities for the goodbye saying there. Slade: So I'm sure tons of people must ask you about, you know, the sadness or the depression that goes along with this environment. Martha Jo: Yeah! Slade: I'm sure you have to see that differently in order to manage all that. So talk to me about the emotional part of doing this work. Martha Jo: So I, along with the people I work with, my colleagues and I feel called to this. And it is very much a soul calling and it very much is, it's a place we want to be and it's a place where we find the energy and yes, there are moments of sadness, and as we do the work, we learn how to carry the sadness differently, and carry the work differently. So when I first started doing death and dying work, I was in my 20s and I took everything home and was sad about everything. And the way I saw death and dying in my 20s is very different than I see it now. It now it is a transition. Somebody is going to their next place. There is a sweetness to it. There is a... Oh, there's an ineffability to it. There's... Words fail me sometimes to talk about how beautiful it is. And it's, there's not a lot of bullshit. I think that's the other thing I really, really love. People who are dying don't have time to pretend, and so the conversations are real. And for those of us who love those kinds of conversations, this is just... It's a beautiful, beautiful place to be and the sadness is, it's almost secondary. In fact, it is secondary. It's the opportunity to be with somebody in a very real presence and the veil is thin and we get to experience magic sometimes, and sometimes it's just life is hard, but we get to do it together, and it's good. Slade: How did this specific calling find you? Was there a turning point that led you down this path? Was there a loved one that passed, that brought you into this experience? Martha Jo: Yeah, yeah. My brother Jim died when I was 23. He was 37 and it was one of those phone calls in the middle of the night and I heard my mother make a sound that I had not ever heard her make before and I knew something was terribly wrong. And we as a family began navigating and negotiating grief and what it looked like and what it felt like and what it sounded like and, it was hard. It was really hard. He was the oldest and much loved and we had to find our way. And one of the things I did was go back to school. I wrote a paper about starting a children's... The task was to write a paper about starting a children's service in San Antonio that didn't exist. So I wrote about starting a children's bereavement centre, and my professor encouraged me to follow up on that. So I did. I started this non-profit and ran it for about seven years called the Children's Bereavement Centre of South Texas. And in that process, I brought my family in and we were able to continue to have conversations about Jim and about our own grief and what we needed. And then we got to hear stories from other people and how they were managing and it became this back and forth of healing and helping, which is the best way to live life, I think. We give and we get and it's not all altruism. And I think for people who think that that is it, I think they're missing the goodness there. Because we get to receive too. So we as a family did that. And became closer as families can in those situations sometimes and ours did. And then my mother was diagnosed with breast cancer and she had death bed visions. She saw my brother, she saw her parents and her grandparents as she was dying, and I had talked to her about, that that could happen and we had some really meaningful conversations around that. That parlayed into more conversations and as my dad got sick more and more, and I ended up doing my dissertation work for my PhD on deathbed phenomenon, and it's been pretty great. Slade: Well you know the reason why I wanted to have you on the show is because there is a magical component to all this. And that's how you and I know each other and that's the thing that we connected around. And so, I mean, of course the most important thing I want to get to kind of some of the magical stories and the mysticisicm around all this. So, I mean, what happens when we die? Martha Jo: There is a, from my vantage point, there is a trajectory of experiences, and the way I envision it now is like a cylinder, and we get on the outside of the cylinder and then we're pulled in and in and in until you get to the centre of it, and you go up and out. Somebody saw my drawing and said, Oh, it's kind of like birth. And I think it is. I think it's very much like birth. As, when people come to us, they know they're dying. We know they're dying. And so, what I watch for, what I see are patterns and what I, the way I work is, when people come into our place, they're doing the work of dying. So sleep changes. One of the first thing we see, people's nights and days will get mixed up. I heard a beautiful story this week about a little girl who, probably 6, 5 or 6 years old, got sent home, immediately didn't go to sleep. And they were talking about giving her more pain medicine and they were going to give her sleep medicine and finally somebody said, Why don't we just ask her why she's not sleeping? And she said, she was afraid she was going to die when she went to sleep and she wasn't sure how she was going to get to heaven. So some really smart person said, Get her some angel wings. So they got her angel wings, put them on her, and said, If you happen to die in your sleep, you'll just fly to heaven. You'll know exactly what to do. She slept from that night on. Slade: Oh, wow. Martha Jo: I know. Isn't that a great story? Slade: Oh gosh, that's wonderful. Martha Jo: Adults do that too. And we get so caught up in, you know, they're not sleeping, they need to be sleeping. It's very much a part of the process. And yes, sometimes you can give people medicine and get them resorted, sometimes not. That's just part of what they need to do. We see people not want to be in their bed. They want to be in another place. They need to be on the couch or they need to sleep in the chair. And it's these little shifts that we watch for. And then there is the visions that begin to happen. And you'll see people look outside, like out the window, out into the yard, and I'm often asked if it's medication related or disease related and I will tell you, the visions happen with all kinds of diseases, medicated or not, and they're different for people but they happen. And I let people make, encourage people to make whatever meaning they need to make out of those. But as part of this trajectory of dying, the person will see people who I call "Friendlies" outside, so they're not people they know. They may see a baseball game. They may hear people on the porch. They may see somebody walking by. Sometimes they're people that are darker skinned than them, which I always find fascinating. White people see black people all the time, which I love. And it's not a, there's not a fear there. It's just, Oh, there's somebody out there. And then the dying person kind of comes back a little bit and they'll go, Okay, but reality is, there isn't really anybody out there, am I going crazy? So part of what we do at Abode is normalize all of this. That these are things that happen and you may see people and you may dream about people and they're here to help you and this is part of the process. The visions eventually come inside, and eventually the Friendlies become people they know. And eventually, the... If you're in a bed and looking at the end of it and you see somebody standing down there, that's one kind of vision people have. And as they get farther into the process, and as they move into the cylinder, or closer into the cylinder, they'll begin to see people up midway around the room and then at the top of the room. And you'll see people reaching. There's a back in time experience, where people are in, oh, the guy who did... Moody. Raymond Moody. Talks about your life review. And dying people have that. You'll see them go back, try to lasso a horse or, in my dad's case, he would put his stole on. He was a minister and he would open his Bible. And I knew exactly what he was doing. And other people would look at him and thought, What is Noble doing? He's back in Sunday school. And further and further and further back people go. And then there's this reaching up as those are reaching towards something. The other thing that happens is this use of metaphors. And the metaphors change as people are further into the trajectory of dying. And it's real subtle. You may be with someone for 12 hours and you may hear three of them. Or you may hear one of them. But they're indicators. And they're indicators that people are a little bit further along in their journey. It's... I tell people they're not predictive. They are signposts. They just show you a little bit where people are and help you know that they're in process and doing what they need to do and I think that helps the people who are family members and friends to prepare their hearts maybe a little bit more too. Slade: Mmm... You wrote a book, by the way, I want to mention, called Signposts of Dying, and I'm sure this is the type of thing that you describe and explain in that book, correct? Martha Jo: Yeah, these are those kinds of things. Sure. Slade: The pre-death visions, as you call them, we have these stories ingrained in our culture, and they're kind of part of our lore. Books and TV always portray them. The seeing of the loved one at the foot of the bed, talking to people that we can't see, the relatives that come to get you to take you on... How many of those kind of pre-death visions are real patterns in the experience of the dying? Martha Jo: Oh, I think everybody has them. I think we just see probably 70% of them. 70% of the people we see, and the other people are so far in their process that they're doing their own thing behind closed eyes. And I watch people, like they're dreaming but they're not dreaming. It's a very different away-ness that happens, as people are in the bed and they go away to another place and then they come back and then they go farther away and they come back for a little less time and it's not as deep here as it was before. You... The quality of the experience with the people in the room changes. Because they need to be in that other place and it's... it is trackable and it does happen with just about everybody I see. Slade: Wow. Martha Jo: Yeah! Slade: So this may put you on the spot, I don't know you can tell me if it does, but based on your observations, do you personally see compelling evidence that the soul is moving on beyond the physical body to another location? Martha Jo: I do think that now. And I have hedged my bets on that for a long time, but I do. We cared for a woman not long ago who was just, if you can imagine, heels dug in and hands out, she did not want to go. It was all she could do to keep from dying and she was going to do it, and.... wasn't eating... I bet she weighed 70 pounds when she finally died. And she was angry. And she spent most of her time angry. And then she was getting up from a commode in the bathroom, somebody was helping her get up, and her heart stopped. And one of the navigators, our people who do the bedside work, we call them In the black navigators, and one of the navigators caught her and thought, Ohmygosh, she's died. And then she came back! Her name was Anna. And she was a little softer, and a little sweeter, and then she went away again, 4, 5, times she died and came back. One time, we were just talking about this last night, we gathered everyone around the bed and we were breathing with her because we thought this was it. And her eyes kind of opened and she looked around the room at all of us and she said, It's so beautiful! Can you hear the flowers? Can you see the colors and just this... all of this landscape that she was seeing. And she... It wasn't crazy talk. It wasn't... I don't know... It was a continued preparation for whatever it was she needed to do and she got to the end of all that and she looked around and said, Can we have coffee? Like, Ohmygod yes, we can have coffee. So we made coffee and we all had coffee together. And she ended up dying a couple of days later. She wanted selfies that night. Part of her process was shifting this anger into an opening for her. And not everybody does that. Lots of people do. There's a feeling to it, there's a texture to it. There's an energy and the energy in the room shifts and I do think there's something else. I do. Slade: You said that your attitude had shifted from the time you were, say, in your 20s doing this work to who you are now doing this work. Martha Jo: Yeah. Slade: And so, is that the direction that you've shifted in? Has it allowed you to maybe relax or feel more peaceful in some way? Martha Jo: Yeah. I think that's a beautiful way to say it. Yes. I helped care for my first human who died was an infant, and being in a hospital setting in the medicalness of all of that, and the fast moving people and the medical language and there wasn't much pause for honoring the spirit of that child. The mentor I had in that moment, happily, called me over, had me put my hand on the baby. She put her hand on the baby. And she looked at me and she said, Sometimes they forget. They had done a code on this kid, and when they finished, everybody just ran out of the room. And so this woman paused for a minute, and wanted me to pause for a minute, and I've never forgotten that. And as I have continued to care for people from my 20s to now, that piece of the dying process has gotten stronger and more rooted in me. And that's primarily how we work with people at Abode. It's not the medical. We don't have IVs, we don't take blood pressure. It's not about any of that. It's about accompanying people. And I like that much better. And it feels, as you say, it's more relaxed and more peaceful and just... it just works better for me. Slade: A little over a year ago, my mother found her companion of 20 years on the floor of his bathroom and he had collapsed, probably had had a heart attack, and after she called 911, as she was waiting for the ambulance, she sort of held his head in her lap and she talked to him as he died. And she says that she feels like he knew that she was there and could hear him. And before speaking to you today, I was talking to her and you know sometimes I'll tell her about people that I'm interviewing or whatever, and I told her a little bit about you and why I was excited to have you on the show, and that I was preparing questions and everything, and she said, Ask her if they can hear us! She really wants to know if they can hear us as they're going. Martha Jo: Yeah, I 1000% believe they can. And I 1000% believe the conversations we have in the room in front of them can help or hinder. So if we, we had a guy with us a couple weeks ago who wanted to make sure his wife was cared for. They'd been married for 55 or 57 years, and so I purposely started a conversation with the children about how they were going to care for their mother, and then purposely started a conversation with the mother about how she was going to be cared for by the children, so he could hear all that. And he died later that night. Did the same thing with another couple who had been married for a long, long time, and she was 87 and hadn't decided where she was going to live. And I started asking her questions in front of him and every once in awhile, I'd holler, Did you hear that? Did you hear that? He hadn't been talking for a couple of days. And somebody probably would walk in and think I was nuts. That he couldn't hear all that. And we've surely had doctors come in and say, They're not in their bodies, they can't hear. I don't believe that at all. I believe that the people who are dying, by and large, make a decision when they're going to go. They pick the moment, if they can. They decide who's going to be in the room or not. And I have seen it again and again and again, waiting 'til that very last person pulls up in the parking lot and they walk in the door and they're gone a minute later. Or they wait until somebody goes to the bathroom or goes to the kitchen, which is 500 yards away, and they go and come back and the person's gone by the time they get back. It's energy. It's energy. And what kind of energy they want or need in the room, and who they want or need in the room, and who they want to protect or not. Who can hold the space for them? The 26 year old, died of colon cancer. The day her mother got a colonoscopy was the day the woman chose to die. And she, we called her mother that morning and her mother was all dopey and couldn't drive over and there was another woman at our place who had connected really, really well with Tai and very much a mother figure and Tai was restless and we, you medicate as much as you can medicate and sometimes there's still a restlessness. And as soon as that woman walked in and started stroking her brow, that child calmed. It was amazing. And very soon after that, she died. She didn't want her mama there. Her mama was taking care of her babies, and her mama was taking care of herself. Very headstrong, neat, neat, neat woman. But I'm, yes, tell your mother, Yes they can hear, and how kind of her to offer that reassurance to her person as he was leaving. Slade: Yeah. Martha Jo: It's a good thing. Slade: I think that's one of my biggest takeaways from this conversation is the idea of, we hear that so much. That they're hanging on, and that they don't want to let go because they're anxious about things that they're leaving unsettled. And to actually, to settle that in their presence so that they can overhear it, or that they can just feel on some level that some of those things that they're anxious about are being taken care of, I will remember that. I will remember that and that will change how I handle that kind of situation, for sure. One thing I really love to ask people on the show is, what do you think is missing from the conversation about dying? Martha Jo: What a great question. We're at a really tenuous point in our American history, about how we are going to care for our dying in the coming years. There are 10,000 baby boomers a day turning 65, and in the next 15 years, we're going to have a plethora of people who are sick and need help and the way we operate now, we're mostly medical and a little bit holistic. And I think what's missing is how we were 50 years ago, but we need to innovate and re-engineer that, not 50 years, probably 75 years ago, when people died at home and we knew what to do. And we knew when somebody was dying, that it was okay to let them go. And we knew how to sit and be present and hold space. That doesn't happen so much anymore because people get sick, they go to the hospital. We send them to rehab and then they get sent to hospice. There's a missing link of how to be present with somebody, and I think that's a vital conversation we need to start having again. Slade: What, if you could change something, what would you change about end of life care? Martha Jo: I would enhance palliative care in our country. Palliative care and hospice care often get lumped together and they're different. Palliative care is about alleviating suffering. And if we can get more people who have chronic illnesses with palliative care people earlier, I believe that would help the way people die and help them die better. Because we would be talking sooner rather than later, and waiting 'til that crisis happens in the hospital, or you know, however it happens. Somebody falls down and hits their head. Do we put them on a ventilator for the rest of their life, or do we let them go? And what have they said? And having those conversations with the family, or having them with your chosen family, having them with your friends, about what you really want, and bringing in the people who are wiling to stand toe-to-toe with the so-called experts, many of them are, I say so-called because they're not experts on you. You are an expert on you and you need to let the people around you know what you want so you can express those, or they can express those wishes when you need them expressed. Slade: Mmm... In addition to your book, Signposts of Dying, is there any other resources that you would recommend for someone to go check out? Martha Jo: Yeah, there's a really beautiful book by Frank Ostaseski, who was Buddhist, who started Zen Hospice in San Francisco. His book is called The Five Invitations, and I think there's words after that, but you'll be able to find it with that. Really beautiful book about dying and dying well. Beautiful stories. What else would I recommend? There's a beautiful book called, When Breath Becomes Air, which is about a surgeon who finishes medical school and then finds out he's got cancer and how he grapples with that and how his family grapples with that. It's a really beautiful book as well. I'll think about some others. Slade: Yeah! I was going to say, I kind of put you on the spot with that question, but absolutely you can send me some things after the fact. I'm sure as soon as we hang up you're going to be like, Oh, I should have said this! Martha Jo: Oh yeah, Here's five more things... Slade: So everyone can check the show notes and we'll have recommended resource links from you. I wanted to throw in one. It just kind of came to me. But, the novelist, Isabel Allende who wrote House of the Spirits and a lot of fiction. She's, I think, Columbian. She wrote a memoir called Paula that is about the death of her daughter from cancer at a really young age. Like in her early 20s. And she talks about, I know it sounds, all this stuff sounds depressing, yet when you read it, it's such a beautiful reverent articulation of the experience and I remember, you know, her talking about what it means, the honor of being present when someone comes into the world and when they leave it. Martha Jo: Yeah. Slade: It gives me chills thinking about it. So if there's anybody, especially who has lost someone recently, and they're looking for something to kind of talk them through the beauty of that, I definitely recommend that book and I'm going to stick that in the show notes too. Martha Jo: Yeah, that's a good one. Slade: What's next for you? What's on your horizon? Martha Jo: The next thing for me, I'm going to start teaching people who want to engage more in death and dying work. I really, the way we're set up right now in this country to care for our dying is not going to be sustainable in 15 years. So part of what I want to do is to start to teach people. There's a number of folks who are doing doula training, which is from the birth doula movement. And they've transferred that to dying. And there are many, many similarities. So I'm going to start doing that and doing some apprenticeship work at Abode. Bringing people to Abode so they can be with our people and see that they're people first and dying second, and think about their own life and ways to live meaningfully. Because I think, at the end of the day, we are all going to die. And how are we living now and how do we want to live? So helping people investigate that and move into more of that. And I want to do the same. Slade: That's a big job and I'm glad you're doing it. You know what? Somebody may hear this and that may speak to them and they may be called to do that because of your conversation . Martha Jo, it's been really wonderful capturing your perspective on something, you know, we talk so much about the veil on this show, we're often on the other side of it. So to get to capture your impressions from the side where you're at, the sort of threshold, is really cool. Tell everyone where they can go to find you, if they want to read more about you. Martha Jo: So my personal website is marthaatkins.com and then Abode's webiste is Abodehome.org and you can find out all kinds of stuff about those places. Slade: Wonderful. That was fantastic, Martha Jo. Thank you for coming on to the show. Martha Jo: Thank you. You have got such a radio voice. It's awesome. Slade: Mine is?? Martha Jo: It is! It's brilliant! Slade: Oh, that's sweet. Thank you. That'll be cute. That's a good way to end it.

Frank Ostaseski has noticed that we as a society obsess about death. We spend a great deal of time trying to prepare for it and hope that we are “ready” for it when the time comes. But according to him, the best way to prepare for death is by living your life the best way you possibly can. Listen as Frank details how simply waiting on the dying of our loved one and ourselves makes us miss all the moments in between.Frank Ostaseski is a Buddhist teacher, international lecturer and a leading voice in contemplative end-of-life care. In 1987, he co-founded of the Zen Hospice Project, the first Buddhist hospice in America. In 2004, he created the Metta Institute to provide innovative educational programs and professional trainings that foster compassionate, mindfulness-based care. He's also the author of The Five Invitations  See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information. Become a member at https://plus.acast.com/s/the-unmistakable-creative-podcast.

Frank Ostaseski has noticed that we as a society obsess about death. We spend a great deal of time trying to prepare for it and hope that we are “ready” for it when the time comes. But according to him, the best way to prepare for death is by living your life the best way you possibly can. Listen as Frank details how simply waiting on the dying of our loved one and ourselves makes us miss all the moments in between.Frank Ostaseski is a Buddhist teacher, international lecturer and a leading voice in contemplative end-of-life care. In 1987, he co-founded of the Zen Hospice Project, the first Buddhist hospice in America. In 2004, he created the Metta Institute to provide innovative educational programs and professional trainings that foster compassionate, mindfulness-based care. He's also the author of The Five Invitations See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Comparto este episodio desde un lugar muy personal de mi experiencia. Una persona a la que aprecio falleció recientemente. Casualmente, hace una semana estaba escuchando un podcast con una hermosa entrevista a Frank Ostaseski. No quiero perder la oportunidad de compartir esta reflexión aquí y en español.  Entender que todos y todas vamos a morir, nos ayuda a entender que, en última instancia, todos estamos juntos en esto a lo que le llamamos vida y nos ayuda a ser más compasivos, más honestos y más justos.

Cathy and Todd discuss The Five Invitations, a book that shows us how to wake up fully to our lives. As a compassionate teacher and cofounder of the Zen Hospice Project, author Frank Ostaseski supports the dying. His five invitations dive into the suffering, joy, and inevitability of death, and why embracing this wisdom will lead to a more mindful and compassionate life. Cathy and Todd use clips from Dead Poets Society and Star Wars to highlight his points, and discuss why this book empowered them to live with greater intention and meaning.

Cathy and Todd discuss The Five Invitations, a book that shows us how to wake up fully to our lives. As a compassionate teacher and cofounder of the Zen Hospice Project, author Frank Ostaseski supports the dying. His five invitations dive into the suffering, joy, and inevitability of death, and why embracing this wisdom will lead to a more mindful and compassionate life. Cathy and Todd use clips from Dead Poets Society and Star Wars to highlight his points, and discuss why this book empowered them to live with greater intention and meaning.

Cathy and Todd discuss The Five Invitations, a book that shows us how to wake up fully to our lives. As a compassionate teacher and cofounder of the Zen Hospice Project, author Frank Ostaseski supports the dying. His five invitations dive into the suffering, joy, and inevitability of death, and why embracing this wisdom will lead to a more mindful and compassionate life. Cathy and Todd use clips from Dead Poets Society and Star Wars to highlight his points, and discuss why this book empowered them to live with greater intention and meaning.

My guest has accompanied more than 1,000 people through the intimate process of dying  My guest is an internationally respected Buddhist teacher and visionary co-founder of the Zen Hospice Project (first Buddhist hospice in America) and founder of the Metta Institute. His groundbreaking work has been featured on in a PBS series called “On Our Own Terms” and has been highlighted on The Oprah Winfrey Show. He was honored by H.H. the Dalai Lama himself.  He is the author of The Five Invitations: Discovering What Death Can Teach Us About Living Fully. LINKS -- Join the Legacy Driven Entrepreneurs Community (it's FREE): http://www.theinnerchangemaker.com/tribe Are you enjoying the podcast? Listen to the episode here and leave us a review: Apple: http://apple.co/1JUHcG9 Android: http://bit.ly/2nuoGpl TuneIn: http://bit.ly/2BjY0gU Breaker: http://bit.ly/2BRwOCb iHeartRadio: http://bit.ly/2BhMr9L Spotify: http://spoti.fi/2BbuWEg Want to grab my NEW audio training? Grab a FREE copy of "How To Be The Leader You Truly Are": http://www.theinnerchangemaker.com/leadership Launching a podcast? Grab my Podcast Creation Roadmap: http://www.theinnerchangemaker.com/roadmap

Mako Voelkel, Dharma Talk, Saturday 23 September 2017, Austin Zen Center

"Death is not waiting for us at the end of a long road. Death is always with us, in the marrow of every passing moment. She is the secret teacher hiding in plain sight, helping us to discover what matters most."Life and death are a package deal. They cannot be pulled apart and we cannot truly live unless we are aware of death. Awareness of death can be a valuable companion on the road to living well, forging a rich and meaningful life, and letting go of regret. But how can we sit with something that is so uncomfortable? And how can utilize the unavoidable nature of death to live a more rewarding life?This week we talk with Frank Ostaseski as he helps us understand how the experience of dying can reveal the secrets of living.As a renowned teacher of compassionate caregiving and the cofounder of the Zen Hospice Project, Frank Ostaseski has sat on the precipice of death with more than a thousand people. In 2001, he was honored by the Dalai Lama for his compassionate service to the dying and their families. Frank is also the founder of the Metta Institute, which is an organizations dedicated to training professionals in compassionate, mindfulness-based care. Frank is the author of the highly acclaimed book, The Five Invitations: Discovering What Death Can Teach Us About Living Fully. The Five Invitations is an exhilarating meditation on the meaning of life and how maintaining an ever-present consciousness of death can bring us closer to our truest selves.https://fiveinvitations.com/

Join TNS Host Steve Heilig for a conversation with Frank Ostaseski—Buddhist teacher, international lecturer, and a leading voice in contemplative end-of-life care—about his new book: The Five Invitations: Discovering What Death Can Teach Us About Living Fully. The profundity of the dying process is so powerful any notion we have of managing or controlling this experience is naïve. To imagine that at the time of our dying we will have the physical strength, emotional stability, and mental clarity to do the work of a lifetime is a ridiculous gamble. Yet Frank wants to extend us an invitation—five invitations, actually—to sit down with death, to have a cup of tea with her, to let her guide you toward living a more meaningful and loving life. Frank Ostaseski is an internationally respected Buddhist teacher, the visionary co-founder of the Zen Hospice Project, and founder of the Metta Institute. He has lectured at Harvard Medical School, the Mayo Clinic, Wisdom.2.0, and teaches at major spiritual centers around the globe. His groundbreaking work has been featured on the Bill Moyers PBS series On Our Own Terms, highlighted on The Oprah Winfrey Show, and honored by H.H. the Dalai Lama. He is the author of "The Five Invitations: Discovering What Death Can Teach Us About Living Fully."

Frank is an internationally respected Buddhist teacher and co-founder of the Zen Hospice Project, and Metta Institute. He has lectured at Harvard Medical School, the Mayo Clinic, been named as one of the 50 most innovative people by AARP, highlighted on the Oprah Winfrey show and honored by the Dalai Lama. In this episode, Frank shares the wisdom he has gleaned by sitting at the bedside of thousands of people who are dying, and which he also covers in his new book The Five Invitations, which goes into great detail regarding what death has taught him about living fully.

The post Frank Ostaseski: The Five Invitations (Part 1) appeared first on New York Zen Center for Contemplative Care.

We spend all this time imagining we're going to get ready for our dying. And I think it's kind of an absurd idea, to imagine that at the time of our dying that we will have the strength of body, the emotional stability, and the mental clarity to do the work of a lifetime. It's an absurd gamble. We should do this work now and that includes those of us who are not dying. Our aging parents for example. Be with them now. Tell them you love them now. Waiting is full of expectation. Waiting for the next moment to arrive we miss this one. Waiting for the moment of dying we miss all the moments in between. Hold death out there. Shine a light on it. Hold it out there as a way of reminding you to attend to what most matters. Frank Ostaseski is a Buddhist teacher, international lecturer and a leading voice in contemplative end-of-life care. In 1987, he co-founded of the Zen Hospice Project, the first Buddhist hospice in America. In 2004, he created the Metta Institute to provide innovative educational programs and professional trainings that foster compassionate, mindfulness-based care. He's also the author of The Five Invitations See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Ram Dass is joined by Roshi Joan Halifax, Raghu Markus and the author of “The Five Invitations,” Frank Ostaseski, to talk about his book and how death offers a path to radical transformation. Frank Ostaseski is a leader in contemplative end-of-life care. His book, "The Five Invitations," gives practices for anyone navigating any sort of loss and shows us how to wake up fully to our lives. Frank leads the group in a discussion about death and dying in the context of these Five Invitations.

An internationally respected Buddhist teacher, Frank Ostaseski is the visionary cofounder of the Zen Hospice Project and Metta Institute. He has sat on the precipice of death with more than a thousand people. He has trained countless clinicians and caregivers in the art of mindful and compassionate care. In The Five Invitations, he distills the lessons gleaned over decades of selfless service offering an evocative and stirring guide that points to a radical path to transformation. The Five Invitations: Don't Wait Welcome Everything, Push Away Nothing Bring Your Whole Self to the Experience Find a Place of Rest in the Middle of Things Cultivate Don't Know Mind The Five Invitations are mutually supportive principles, permeated with love that are reliable guides for being with dying. And, as it turns out, they have a relevance for all of us in living a life of integrity, meaning and purpose. They can be understood as best practices for anyone navigating a life transition, coping with loss or serious illness or a personal crisis. They guide us toward appreciating life's preciousness. The Five Invitations is a powerful and inspiring exploration of the essential wisdom dying has to show about waking up fully to our lives.

Frank Ostaseski is the co-founder of Zen Hospice and has been serving people for over 35 years. He is the absolute definition of a modern Zen Master and Saint. In this podcast he shares powerful stories, wisdom and lessons. Here are some things we discuss; - Cultivating a listening heart - The Spaghetti Story: Lessons from a man who wanted to take his own life - the Five Invitations: Discovering What Death Can Teach Us About Fully Living - The labour of birth and death - A Zen Parable - The story of the tough Russian woman - Frank's advice for dealing with losing a loved one and grief - Why you should move toward what hurts - Understanding Zen without ever meditating https://fiveinvitations.com/ www.mattbelair.com & www.patreon.com/mattbelair Donate: bit.ly/mattbelair Support by Doing an Act of Kindness for Someone Today! Subscribe: Podcast: goo.gl/1euQe7 YouTube: goo.gl/Mz7Ngg   Download a Free Guide to Lucid Dreaming E-Book and Guided Hypnotic Experience: www.mattbelair.com/luciddreaming   About Me: ======== Master your mind, body, and spirit with Matt Belair and world-renowned leaders today! This unique show features candid conversations with experts in personal development, spirituality, and human optimization. Each episode is another key to help you unlock your infinite potential and assist you on your path to self-mastery! You will discover the best tips, tools, and technologies to master your mind; plus the science, principles, and practices to master your body. Finally, you will dive into the deepest depths of yourself, life, the universe and the pursuit of discovering who you really are, and consciously creating the life of your dreams! Explore timeless spiritual lessons and ancient teachings. Let go of any limitations and discover all of the tools to dramatically improve your health, well-being, and mindset! mattbelair.com/bio/ May Love, Joy, Passion, Peace, and Prosperity fill your life! Namaste