Sacred by Design

Have you ever felt broken or filled with shame, wondering if you could ever see yourself as whole again? Join us as we kick off Season Two of "Sacred by Design" with a heartfelt reflection on the  meaning behind our podcast's name. We recount the pivotal moment we chose "Sacred by Design" and discuss its deep resonance for women grappling with trauma or unwanted sexual behaviors. Despite feelings of shame or brokenness, we emphasize that every woman is inherently sacred by God's design. Our aim is to help you see yourself through God's eyes—beautiful, honorable, and awe-inspiring.Journey with us further as we explore the path to healing and rediscovery of your sacred self. We talk about how God touches our lives through beauty, creativity, and joy—like the calming presence of water or the exhilaration of music. Reflecting on the nurturing image of God from Zephaniah 3:17, we highlight Him as a comforting parent who sings over us, offering peace and rest. We urge you to embrace new words, songs, and pathways as tools for your healing journey, recognizing that you are sacred by design. This episode is an invitation to reconnect with your sacred identity and find joy in that realization. Start overcoming porn, masturbation, and other unwanted sexual behaviors, by rewriting how you respond to desire, temptation, mess-ups, and shame. Let's keep the conversation going!Are you ready for freedom and redemption? Discover the OasisHave you received our Free 21 day Prayer Journal ?Watch Sacred by Design on YouTube!Want Andrea to talk about a specific topic? Change up the format, or just tell us the podcast rocks! We would love your feedback on Sacred by Design.

Do you feel that stubborn willpower should be sufficient to overcome pornography addiction, masturbation or casual hookups? We're here to help dispel that myth, sharing how this mentality often leads to self-blame and failure, creating a cycle of despair. The truth, which may surprise you, is that it's in these challenging times that we should invite divine intervention. We're not meant to go through this alone; God is ready to help and guide us towards a life of greater freedom. *This is an excerpt from a recent seminar with our Sacred by design team.  Join us as we explore the science behind pornography addiction, discussing how it hijacks the brain's reward system, leading to responses that are difficult to overcome on your own. We also emphasize the importance of being kind to oneself during recovery. Hear the inspiring story of Julie, a young woman who battled pornography and masturbation.  How she overcame the isolation she felt due to her same-sex attraction, and how seeking help allowed her to shift her perspective, realizing that she couldn't win this fight on her own. Start Discovering What Healing & Wholeness Can Look and Feel Like, Even If You're Currently Struggling to Accept God's Forgiveness and Love for You. Are you ready?Join our free Webinar and begin your journey! Have you received our Free 21 day Prayer Journal ? Watch Sacred by Design on YouTube!Want Andrea to talk about a specific topic? Change up the format, or just tell us the podcast rocks! We would love your feedback on Sacred by Design.

Ever wondered how a CrossFit gym can teach you about spiritual growth? Through my personal journey, I've uncovered how physical well-being intertwines with our spiritual transformation, especially on the path toward sexual wholeness. This episode is a deep dive into the lessons learned from my CrossFit experience, emphasizing the need to warm up our hearts, minds, and bodies with gratitude, and the importance of embracing the tension of our past and future selves. Discover how these physical disciplines can help build belief in the dignity and worthiness of who God calls us to be.In the second half, the conversation continues further down the path of physical and spiritual well-being. Recounting a powerful encounter with my CrossFit coach Patty, I share insight into overcoming mental barriers and the role of physical empowerment in our spiritual metamorphosis. This is not just about doing the heavy lifting spiritually, but also physically. You are invited to consider the critical role of post-workout cooling down and restoration in our spiritual journey, reflecting the importance of balance in our pursuit of a wholesome, transformative life. So, ready to flex those spiritual muscles? Let's get started! Start Discovering What Healing & Wholeness Can Look and Feel Like, Even If You're Currently Struggling to Accept God's Forgiveness and Love for You. Are you ready?Join our free Webinar and begin your journey! Have you received our Free 21 day Prayer Journal ? Watch Sacred by Design on YouTube!Want Andrea to talk about a specific topic? Change up the format, or just tell us the podcast rocks! We would love your feedback on Sacred by Design.

Think back to when you were a child and remember how your vision of the world was reshaped the first time you put on a pair of glasses. That's how I felt when I got my first pair at 12 - suddenly, everything was crystal clear, and not only in a physical sense. The glasses were not just tools for better vision; they became a metaphor for the lens through which I viewed my life. This episode is all about those lenses of perception - are we seeing ourselves through a lens of brokenness or belovedness? Our outlook can dramatically change our decisions and our sense of self-worth.The second part of our discussion takes us deeper into understanding the impact of these lenses on our lives. We're caught in a tug of war between brokenness, laden with guilt, shame, and loneliness, and belovedness, filled with curiosity, honor, honesty, and compassion. But what if we consciously choose to view ourselves through the lens of belovedness? Tune in as we navigate this transformative journey of self-discovery, healing, and acceptance, inspired by the promises of Habakkuk and Jeremiah. Remember, God has a plan for us all, and by changing our lens, we can change our lives. So, are you ready to see yourself in a new light? Start Discovering What Healing & Wholeness Can Look and Feel Like, Even If You're Currently Struggling to Accept God's Forgiveness and Love for You. Are you ready?Join our free Webinar and begin your journey! Have you received our Free 21 day Prayer Journal ? Watch Sacred by Design on YouTube!Want Andrea to talk about a specific topic? Change up the format, or just tell us the podcast rocks! We would love your feedback on Sacred by Design.

Are you tired of feeling alone in your struggle with porn and masturbation? We're here to share some seriously good news; you're not alone, and freedom is absolutely possible. We've designed the 'Oasis' program specifically for you, an eight-week journey  on November 9th brimming with video teachings, enlightening questions, bonus content, and so much more. The lessons in Oasis are inspired by women who've shared your struggle and found respite in their journey, tackling robust topics such as surrender, warfare, temptation, and recovery.We're also offering a 21-day prayer journal, filled to the brim with prayers, practical tips, spiritual practices, and so much more. Mark your calendars, as on November 9th, at 7 p.m., our friends Kyle and Rebecca from Sacred by Design will be hosting a free webinar on Oasis. This webinar will offer inspiration, stories of women who've found freedom, and the opportunity for you to kickstart your journey to break free from unwanted sexual behavior. We believe in you, and we believe Oasis could be your next big step. You are warmly invited to join us in this journey, to connect your struggle to your story, and your story to God. Through Oasis, we pray that you will hear Jesus calling you to refreshment, restoration, and regeneration. Have you received our Free 21 day Prayer Journal ? Watch Sacred by Design on YouTube!Want Andrea to talk about a specific topic? Change up the format, or just tell us the podcast rocks! We would love your feedback on Sacred by Design.

Ever feel overwhelmed by triggers or difficult people? We've got the tools to help! Our latest episode offers a deep dive into the powerful phrase "name it to tame it" and demonstrates how this technique can help us deal with life's challenges. We put 'affect' under the microscope and explain how you can measure it on a scale of 1 to 10. By using the fascinating example of a baby zebra imprinting on his mother, we'll draw parallels to our own life experiences and reveal how we can find our way back to our grounding figures in moments of chaos.As we venture further, we shine a light on the role of imprinting and connection with Jesus. This episode unveils practical strategies to connect with Jesus in our everyday lives - even in the most mundane tasks like commuting or waiting at an appointment. You'll discover the transformative power of a prayer from Ephesians 1:17-19 and the soothing influence of a breath prayer when the world seems too much to handle. You're not alone. You are deeply loved by a God who is always with us, and His plans for us are good. Join us on this journey, and let's navigate through life's trials together. Have you received our Free 21 day Prayer Journal ? Watch Sacred by Design on YouTube!Want Andrea to talk about a specific topic? Change up the format, or just tell us the podcast rocks! We would love your feedback on Sacred by Design.

Ever had a journey of pain that led you to a journey of faith?This episode is for you. We sit down with an extraordinary guest who has been through physical and emotional pain due to numerous surgeries and chronic illness.She shares how her pain, instead of pushing her away, actually brought her closer to her faith and revealed a brand new perspective on scriptures. Feeling isolated during her recovery, she turned to journaling which became her intimate conversation with God. You'll hear a raw and unfiltered narrative of how her pain transformed into spiritual growth and deepened her connection with God.We also delve into how her journey through pain has brought the Bible to life for her, offering a unique perspective often overlooked.This episode is a testament to resilience and provides a fresh outlook on embracing pain in our healing journey, not as a roadblock, but as a path leading us to spiritual growth and deeper faith. Have you received our Free 21 day Prayer Journal ? Watch Sacred by Design on YouTube!Want Andrea to talk about a specific topic? Change up the format, or just tell us the podcast rocks! We would love your feedback on Sacred by Design.

Ever wondered why you're caught in a cycle of repeating habits?We're about to share some insights that might just change your perception of sexual integrity. We're investigating the reasons behind our desires for care, comfort, connection, and community, and how these are fundamentally tied to God's design for our sexuality.We're not just talking about breaking habits here, but an invitation to a wholesome life filled with freedom and deeper connections.We're also throwing light on our unique Oasis curriculum, which is an eight-week course designed to guide you on this enlightening journey. In the latter half, we're turning the pages of the scripture to Psalm 119.This isn't your typical bible study, but a way to harness the power of the Psalm's action words in your personal growth.We're talking about trusting in God's word, adhering to His instructions, and the joy of walking in open spaces without the burden of guilt.If you're on the brink of giving up, our discussion is aimed to inspire you to trust in God's judgments and continue the journey.Get ready to deepen your faith, broaden your understanding of sexual integrity, and experience a personal growth like never before. Watch Sacred by Design on YouTube!Want Andrea to talk about a specific topic? Change up the format, or just tell us the podcast rocks! We would love your feedback on Sacred by Design.

Embarking on a transformative journey can be challenging, especially when it involves breaking away from deeply ingrained habits like porn and masturbation addiction.But what if there was a roadmap to guide you through this journey—a way to prepare your heart, mind, and body for the transformation ahead?We're not just talking about theoretical concepts here.We're talking real, practical tools that you can start using today.This episode is packed with insights and tips, gleaned from our clients' experiences, on what you need to pack for this unique journey. We discuss everything from the importance of a good night's sleep to the power of physical fitness in aiding your recovery.Plus, we introduce a special resource we've been working on—a 21-day prayer journal designed specifically for women on this journey.It's a practical, hands-on tool that aims to inspire and encourage you each day.So if you're ready to embark on this journey towards sexual wholeness, then buckle up and let's walk towards freedom together.Get the 21 Day Prayer Journal for Women here. Watch Sacred by Design on YouTube!Want Andrea to talk about a specific topic? Change up the format, or just tell us the podcast rocks! We would love your feedback on Sacred by Design.

Imagine embarking on a marathon, not only strapped with your running gear but also with the weight of guilt, shame, and frustration.Can you picture yourself crossing the finish line? This episode is your cheerleading squad, equipping you with the support and encouragement necessary for a spiritual race of such magnitude.We draw parallels from the biblical narrative of the prodigal son, reflecting on our own episodes of faltering faith and the feelings those periods stir.We implore you to reach out in prayer, lean on your spiritual community, and embrace the love of a Father who is always ready to welcome you home.As we continue on this journey, we analyze Hebrews 12 and its application to our pursuit of sexual wholeness.We discuss the powerful image of “a great cloud of witnesses”, likening it to a stadium filled with cheerleaders urging us on. This discourse is a clarion call to invite others into our lives, not only for community but also as constant reminders of our commitment to wholeness. It's a challenging journey, no doubt, but as we keep our gaze on Jesus, we find solace in the assurance that the Father cares, and is there to strengthen and support us.So come along, and allow us to be your cheerleaders in this spiritual marathon.You're not too far gone, and the Father's loving embrace awaits you. Watch Sacred by Design on YouTube!Want Andrea to talk about a specific topic? Change up the format, or just tell us the podcast rocks! We would love your feedback on Sacred by Design.

Have you ever felt bound in lies and shame, just like the bleeding woman in Mark 5? Embark on a personal journey where I share my own experiences of healing and transformation that took me over 40 years, revealing how Jesus is committed to healing us, providing care, comfort, and connection. In the second part of the journey, we also look into how the bleeding woman's physical healing led to her spiritual liberation. Drawing parallels with our own struggles, let's take a moment to reflect on how our beliefs could be holding us back.Allow me, to offer you some approaches to present these beliefs to Jesus and find true liberation. And if you need additional support, our spiritual coaches are here to guide you through.Be prepared for an intriguing episode that confronts the deepest parts of our existence, and find the courage to open up to the transformative healing power of Jesus. Watch Sacred by Design on YouTube!Want Andrea to talk about a specific topic? Change up the format, or just tell us the podcast rocks! We would love your feedback on Sacred by Design.

Ever felt like you've hit a wall in your journey towards sexual integrity?It's a common situation, but not a dead end. In our discussion today, we shed light on the causes of this 'stuckness', such as fear, perfectionism, and a culture obsessed with instant gratification.We also explore how Scripture, particularly Psalm 84:5-7, can empower us to move forward. Remember, Jesus doesn't want us to remain stuck. Realizing that we are stuck is the first step to freedom.As we continue, we delve into the transformative role of prayer in this journey. Prayer is not just a religious activity, it's a path to self-understanding, a tool for staying present, and most importantly, a comforting reminder that we are not alone in our struggles.We discuss how prayer can provide discernment and guidance to navigate our challenges. So, whether you're grappling with feelings of stuckness or seeking a deeper connection through prayer, we invite you to join us.Take solace in the truth that even in struggle, we're never alone because Jesus is with us. Watch Sacred by Design on YouTube!Want Andrea to talk about a specific topic? Change up the format, or just tell us the podcast rocks! We would love your feedback on Sacred by Design.

It's time we remind ourselves that resting isn't just permissible - it's necessary.This episode draws inspiration from the story of Elijah in One Kings 19, demonstrating how even in the midst of exhaustion and pressure, taking a break to rest is vital.We share relatable anecdotes and discuss grounding techniques that engage all your senses, bringing you back to the present moment, just like it did for Elijah.We take a deep, rejuvenating breath and journey into the teachings of Matthew 11, exploring the transformative power of intentional rest and refreshment.Let us guide you in the art of grounding, encouraging you to disconnect from the chaos and carve out space for rest.Immerse yourself in the liberating realization that taking a pause allows us to learn the unforced rhythms of grace, enabling us to live freely and lightly.Tune in to this soul enriching episode and start embracing refreshment as part of your journey.Key Lessons:The journey towards sexual wholeness requires significant effort and can be exhausting.Rest and slowing down are not signs of losing momentum but rather opportunities for refreshment.God empathizes with our weariness and wants to be part of our journey.Grounding exercises using the five senses can help bring awareness and peace in challenging moments.Embracing rest and leaning into God's unforced rhythms of grace can lead to regeneration and freedom.Next Steps:Learn more about the practice of grounding and its benefits by visiting Regen.Reflect on Matthew 11:28-30, and consider how you can embrace Jesus' invitation to find rest and live freely and lightly. Watch Sacred by Design on YouTube!Want Andrea to talk about a specific topic? Change up the format, or just tell us the podcast rocks! We would love your feedback on Sacred by Design.

What if we told you that it's okay, even necessary, to grieve the loss of your addiction? It's a bold idea, but bear with us. In this thought-provoking episode, we open up about the often overlooked but essential part of recovery: grief.We delve into the sense of loss that can accompany walking away from past habits like pornography or casual sex. While these served as a comforting escape, releasing them is crucial for healing, even if guilt attempts to sneak in.During the second half of the episode, we further explore how embracing grief, sans guilt, can lead us to a profound connection with the divine.Drawing inspiration from Dan Allender's wisdom, we ponder how our hearts are most open to God's kindness and presence when we are in the throes of grief. As we guide you through this healing journey, we'll share practical ways to healthily express your grief—be it through journaling, prayer, or seeking solace in scripture.This episode is a heartfelt exploration of grief as a vital component of recovery and the transformative power of naming and honoring your feelings.It's a journey towards sexual wholeness, one where grief is not a foe, but a friend. Watch Sacred by Design on YouTube!Want Andrea to talk about a specific topic? Change up the format, or just tell us the podcast rocks! We would love your feedback on Sacred by Design.

Ever wondered how to counter the lure of temptation? Let's explore the complex nature of temptation and how it intersects with our boundaries and struggles with sin. This episode is your guide, leading you through the entangled maze of solitude and temptation, connecting you back to the Garden of Eden and tracing the thread right up to the temptation of Jesus in the desert.Explore the intricate equation of temptation and isolation, and discover how it is intended to mislead us from our authentic destiny.Let's arm ourselves and head into battle with the shield of faith!Drawing insights from Priscilla Scheyer's study on the Armor of God, this episode emphasizes the significance of community in combating temptation.Uncover the power of the 'turtle formation' and how it symbolizes collective strength against the fiery darts of the evil one.Remember, Jesus stands ready to meet us in our moments of temptation. Join the ranks of the mighty men and women of God as we navigate through these trials with Jesus, scripture, and a supportive community at our side. Watch Sacred by Design on YouTube!Want Andrea to talk about a specific topic? Change up the format, or just tell us the podcast rocks! We would love your feedback on Sacred by Design.

Let's unravel the negatives of a non-stop, overcommitted life, and the detrimental impact of not pausing to process and connect with our feelings.Ready for a revelation that will transform your life's pace and awareness? We'll also get candid about how faith may sometimes present as a hurdle to slowing down.Yet, the power of noticing our emotions and strengths can pave the way to a life rich with meaning and connection. Unplug from the bustle and plug into self-awareness with us.Wondering about the potency of taking a moment to notice?This segment is your eye-opener. Bathe in the awe-inspiring moments that can catalyze us towards a fulfilling life brimming with purpose and connection.Drawing wisdom from the book of Ruth, we'll illuminate how God's observant nature spurs us to do the same. Embrace the practice of self-awareness and harmonize with your body to decipher your feelings.We wrap up with an enchanting reading from "To Bless the Space Between Us", underscoring the splendor and strength of the act of noticing.Get ready to change your perspective and find more meaning in your life. Watch Sacred by Design on YouTube!Want Andrea to talk about a specific topic? Change up the format, or just tell us the podcast rocks! We would love your feedback on Sacred by Design.

As a woman, what does God, the creator, say about your purpose, about your identity? About your power? Sit with that. Ask him that. Listen for the answers. Journal through it.We promise that this episode is not just about Barbie, but rather a broader exploration of the female journey towards self-discovery and the quest for identity.We will take you on a metaphorical trip, using scenes from Barbie's movie to shed light on the powerful emotions that many of us experience in our personal struggles. It's about grappling with life's challenges, the detours we make, including issues such as pornography and masturbation, in our quest for meaning.We want to remind you that your worth is not determined by external standards; you are more than a plastic doll. You are a unique creation, with a unique purpose, and we invite you to present your questions and uncertainties to your Creator.Ever felt trapped by the structures around you?This episode also discusses the roadblocks set up by systems we've been part of, and highlights God's call to identify and overcome these obstacles.We borrow the profound wisdom from Jeremiah 6 to emphasize the importance of standing, looking, asking, and moving towards the path that leads to rest. It's about moving forward, breaking barriers, and striding towards the masterpiece that God envisions for each of us.So, tune in and get ready to be encouraged, inspired and to take a step closer towards the unique purpose that's been crafted just for you. Watch Sacred by Design on YouTube!Want Andrea to talk about a specific topic? Change up the format, or just tell us the podcast rocks! We would love your feedback on Sacred by Design.

What if we told you that navigating your teenager's struggles, particularly with sexuality, doesn't have to be as overwhelming as it seems?That's right, we're here to equip you with practical tools and strategies to not just withstand but also guide your child through this tricky phase.We base our discussion on deep insights from the book 'Praying Circles Around Your Children' by Mark Batterson, aiming to support you, be it a mom, dad, guardian, or someone who deeply cares for a child.This episode is more than just a conversation about teens and their struggles; it's a testament to the strength we can find in our faith. We talk about the pressures that our children face from society's expectations and how to find hope, renewal, and safety in our faith.Learn how to trust God with every person and situation in your lives and renew your strength in Him. Remember, you're not alone in your struggles and, with faith, you have the power to navigate through this journey.So tune in, because this conversation serves as a beacon of hope, offering you an encouraging and uplifting perspective on parenting. Watch Sacred by Design on YouTube!Want Andrea to talk about a specific topic? Change up the format, or just tell us the podcast rocks! We would love your feedback on Sacred by Design.

Ever wondered how to honor your past without letting shame dictate your journeyImagine being able to replace shame with a more empowering word, acknowledging its role in your life, and recognizing that the story has changed. We've crafted an episode that brings light to this transformative process.Drawing inspiration from biblical stories such as Jesus and the new wine and the old wineskin, the Prodigal Son, Martha and Mary, as well as insights from Aundi Kolber 's "Try Softer", we reflect on how to practice compassion and safety in our journey towards sexual wholeness. Step onto the path of self-discovery as we delve into the power of tapping and speaking truths over ourselves to integrate our belovedness further.Scripture, like Psalm 23, serves as our guide in this transformational exercise. We unwrap the profound significance of Jesus' death and how it continues to manifest in our bodies.The conversation culminates with a heartfelt prayer, seeking restoration and regeneration of thoughts with more love, less criticism, and more grace. This episode is more than just chatter; it's a toolkit for honoring your journey from where you've been to where you're going.So, tune in and give your past its rightful place - a stepping stone to a brighter future.Watch Sacred by Design on YouTube!Want Andrea to talk about a specific topic? Change up the format, or just tell us the podcast rocks! We would love your feedback on Sacred by Design.

Are your habits and addictions holding you back?Join me, Andrea, as we boldly navigate the challenging terrain of triggers in Sacred by Design.We'll unveil the power of naming and understanding your triggers, the important second step towards breaking the cycle of addiction.Together, we'll journey through the profound wisdom of the Bible, revealing how Jesus is aware of our struggles and invites us towards wholeness. The second half of our conversation takes us deeper into the realm of freedom from our sexual brokenness through Jesus's love and understanding.We'll challenge ourselves to identify and control our triggers before they control us.Remember, Jesus is here to offer us power and freedom from these triggers.As we wrap up, consider exploring more by visiting our website and connecting with one of our spiritual coaches.Listen in, as we illuminate the pathway to overcome the power of triggers and step into the liberty of Jesus's love.Episode Resources:More on the Cycle of Addiction can be found here.Read more of John 18 here.Find the great work of Curt Thompson here.Watch Sacred by Design on YouTube!Want Andrea to talk about a specific topic? Change up the format, or just tell us the podcast rocks! We would love your feedback on Sacred by Design.

What if the key to breaking free from unwanted sexual behavior lies in the power of your thoughts?Let's journey together through this thought-provoking conversation as we explore the often overlooked significance of our mental pathways and how they can lead us to experiences of shame, isolation, and disappointment.Yet, there's hope. There's a promise - and not just any promise, but one from Jesus, who is ready to guide us in creating new neural paths filled with freedom, victory, and community. We'll tackle the challenging topic of overcoming addiction by understanding the 'why' behind our behaviors. We'll grapple with the discomfort of change and resistance but also discover the liberation that comes with redirecting our thoughts towards truth, honor, purity, and love.We'll discuss practical ways to utilize tools like the pause app to build our mental strength, catching and transforming negative thoughts. Join us as we blaze a new path with Jesus, turning our minds and hearts towards the ultimate freedom He offers.Let's remember, we are not alone in this journey, and with Jesus, we can achieve more than we ever imagined.Episode Resources:    Regen on YouTube    What We DoWant us to talk about a specific topic? Change up the format, or just tell us the podcast rocks! We want your feedback on Sacred by Design. You can leave your feedback here.Want Andrea to talk about a specific topic? Change up the format, or just tell us the podcast rocks! We would love your feedback on Sacred by Design. You can leave your feedback here.

Buckle up, Sacred by Design listeners, because we're about to take a more frequent journey together!Starting now, you can expect soul-nourishing episodes every week, diving into the intricacies of our sexuality, our relationship with God, and all the messy, beautiful bits in between.And as a cherry on top, every month, we'll be joined by voices you love - Kit, Anne, Rebecca, and Kyle, as we dive deeper into gritty topics like sexual boundaries in dating and recovery from sexual betrayal.Now, let's talk about perfection.When Jesus tells us to be perfect in Matthew 5.48, He's inviting us to wholeness, not the unrealistic, stress-inducing kind of perfection we often strive for. As we navigate through topics like friendship, fantasy, loneliness, and lust, we're aiming to help you understand and embrace your sexuality in all its goodness, holiness, and beauty.Together, let's continue to unwrap the divine truth that every bit of you is sacred by design.Come, join our journey towards wholeness and understanding.Transcription: Bonus Episode: Unmasking the SacredEpisode Resources:    Regen on YouTube    What We DoWant us to talk about a specific topic? Change up the format, or just tell us the podcast rocks! We want your feedback on Becoming Whole. You can leave your feedback here.

Tired of navigating the confusing world of sexual boundaries within Christian dating relationships?We're here to help you redefine these boundaries as markers of holiness, focusing on maintaining sacredness and godliness according to God's intentions.Join us as we dive into Paul's words in 1 Thessalonians 4:3-6 and discuss how to approach dating relationships with a heart for protecting our future spouse, even if our current relationship doesn't work out.We'll share insights on having conversations about maintaining holiness within dating relationships, and understanding that not every partnership will lead to marriage.Learn how to think beyond boundaries and focus on internal convictions, fostering a deeper connection with God and your partner. Ready to invite God into your dating life and strive for holiness and sacredness in your love journey?Don't miss this eye-opening episode on redefining sexual boundaries in Christian dating.Highlights:A boundary is defined as the line that marks the limits of a particular area. The problem is in dating relationships that line can move a lot. Consider Markers of Holiness as an approach to a God honoring relationship. The Bible defines holiness as something sacred or Godly. How can you take that and apply it to your dating relationship?Boundaries can be subjective and get blurry with temptation. Make the effort to have the conversation about Markers for Holiness with your partner BEFORE physical intimacy. At the point of sexual arousal, your brain may not have the ability to make a different choice. 1 Thessalonians 4:3-6 It is God's will that you should be sanctified: that you should avoid sexual immorality; that each of you should learn to control your own body  in a way that is holy and honorable, not in passionate lust like the pagans, who do not know God;  and that in this matter no one should wrong or take advantage of a brother or sisterTranscription: Redefining Sexual Boundaries in Christian DatingEpisode Resources:    Regen on YouTube    What We DoWant us to talk about a specific topic? Change up the format, or just tell us the podcast rocks! We want your feedback on Becoming Whole. You can leave your feedback here.

Are you ready to unlock the secrets of true intimacy in your marriage?Join us on this eye-opening episode of Sacred By Design, where we peel back the layers of intimacy, diving deeper than just the physical aspect.We discuss the six aspects of intimacy – emotional, physical, sexual, intellectual, recreational, and spiritual – and reveal how understanding and nurturing these elements can lead to a stronger, more fulfilling relationship with your spouse.Listen in as we explore the importance of emotional vulnerability and transparency, and how simple tools like bidding can bring about profound emotional connection.We share insights on nurturing intimacy in your relationship by working together to capitalize on your strengths and improve your weaknesses in each of the six aspects of intimacy.Discover how to ignite intellectual intimacy by seeking out new ideas and interests to share with your partner. Don't miss this powerful episode that will transform the way you view intimacy within your marriage and start cultivating deeper connections today!INTIMACY HOMEWORKSit down with your spouse and explore each of these types of intimacy. Where is your strength? Where might you need some help? Choose one way to celebrate your strength and one way to work on an area that needs help.Consider each type of intimacy:Emotional Intimacy-Be aware of “bidding” in your relationship.Physical-Be intentional. Try simple ,meaningful gestures like holding hands, or greeting each other or saying goodbye with a hug or a kiss.Sexual-Be willing to talk openly and honestly about where you are and your hopes and desires for your sexual relationship.Intellectual-Talk about ways you want to  connect -conversations, day trips, books or experiences around certain ideas or issues?Recreational-Have fun! Spiritual intimacy-Just as you want your personal relationship with God to be alive and deepening, it is important to have your shared experience around God to be deepening as well. Explore what works best for your marriage!Transcription: Deepening Your Connection: Exploring the Six Sides of Intimacy in MarriageEpisode Resources:    Regen on YouTube    What We DoWant us to talk about a specific topic? Change up the format, or just tell us the podcast rocks! We want your feedback on Becoming Whole. You can leave your feedback here.

Have you ever wondered why some women struggle with pornography addiction, and how it might be connected to deeper heart issues?In this intimate and powerful conversation, we tackle the tough topic of pornography addiction in women and the extra layer of shame they often bear.Join us as we explore how the type of porn someone is drawn to can reveal underlying issues, such as upbringing, gender roles, or personal vows.We're committed to guiding you on a journey of self-discovery and healing, holding these conversations tenderly and carefully.Moreover, we emphasize the significance of personal growth and taking responsibility for the journey that led you to your current situation.Discover how understanding your vulnerabilities and owning your part in it can lead to a less vulnerable state.This episode is essential listening for anyone seeking to unearth the deeper issues behind their struggles with pornography addiction and craving true connection and purpose in their lives.Show Notes and much more here.

Consider this episode a life course. And we're calling this class Boundaries 101:What are they?How do I set up boundaries?Why do I set up boundaries?What does God think of boundaries?If they're so good, why are they so hard to set up?This topic and conversation is rich with definitions and examples and more. Let's get started.Highlights:Boundaries are more about saying “yes” to our healthy selves than they are about saying “no” to someone else.START WITH THE BIG PICTUREAs you begin to consider boundaries, ask yourself:  What vision do I have for my  life? What kind of person do I envision myself being or do I envision God wants me to be? What would that person do and say and believe about herself? And what would her relationships be like?BOUNDARIES STEP BY STEPBe straightforward and Kind Affirm the positiveBe honestGive it to God“Boundaries define us. They define what is me and what is not me. A boundary shows me where I end and where someone else begins leading me to a sense of ownership.” -John Townsend

H.A.L.T is a powerful tool used in recovery. Each letter represents a different risk state that can lead you to your drug of choice (H Hungry, A Angry, L Lonely, T Tired).In this episode of Sacred by Design, we're exploring the risk state of Loneliness. Out of the 4, loneliness feels the most risky and vulnerable to talk about.So, we're talking about it. Highlights:In your journey towards sexual wholeness, acknowledge that loneliness is powerful and not something to be brushed off. Whether you're addicted to alcohol, food, sex - the acronym HALT is a powerful tool in recovery.Learning to recognize loneliness and even appreciate loneliness as a risk state can be Step One.When you recognize loneliness, do you panic? You may find yourself asking, “How do I get out of this? How do I not feel this?Try to stop and ask yourself, “What's going on for me right now? What am I feeling here? What am I looking for here? ”Pray for Discernment- Is it asking yourself: “Is there something really wrong here that I need to fix?” Or is it more of a statement: “I want to be more deeply, more fully known. And I can't have that from the people in my life right now.”We are all deeply wired to be known and to be loved. That's a good and beautiful part of ourselves. If there's a longing that needs to be met; then we will seek it out in other ways whether that's conscious or not.But we see this in lots of different ways - we might react, we might even push people away or protest even though we want that the most. We so want connection, to be seen by others.It is a hard thing to slow down enough to say “I'm feeling lonely. I am sacred by design. God's given me this desire to be known and loved. That's a good part of me and God, I'm really feeling that longing right now.  Could you be with me in it.”Spiritual Practice:LECTIO DIVINA = (Read once, read a second time and ask the Lord to give you a word or phrase, read a third time asking God what He wants to teach you through that word or phrase)Psalm 71You can just listen and follow alongIn you O Lord do I take refuge.Let me not be put to shameIn your righteousness, deliver me and rescue meIncline your ear to meBe to me a rock of refuge to which I may continually comeO Lord you are my hopeBe not far from meI will hope continually will praise you yet more and moreYou who made me see many troubles and calamities will revive me againFrom the depths of the earth, You will bring me up againYou will increase my greatnessAnd comfort me again.Help the show:Support the showHelp us improve the show.Leave a reviewSubscribe wherever you get your podcastsFollow us on YouTube for behind the scenes and more

We hope by now you've come to expect the unexpected from Sacred by Design. Sexuality and Singleness is what we are talking about today! That being said, many of you might assume the life of a single, Christian woman  means numbing and suppressing desires.Being single doesn't just mean not having sex. There is so much more. Are you willing to give God the space, as you listen to this podcast, to embrace a different perspective about your sexuality in your singleness?Acknowledge the sad, angry, frustrated feelings.Make space for the struggle in it.And, then consider bringing it all to Jesus in exchange for all He has just for you. Highlights:God wants you to be able to express how you're feeling. He's not expecting you to dampen it and push your desires down. He wants all of you. Bring it all to Him.Jesus wants to be with you as we feel your feelings. He doesn't want to turn you away.Hebrews 4:15-16 “For we do not have a High Priest who is unable to sympathize and understand our weaknesses and temptations, but One who has been tempted [knowing exactly how it feels to be human] in every respect as we are, yet without [committing any] sin.  Therefore let us [with privilege] approach the throne of grace [that is, the throne of God's gracious favor] with confidence and without fear, so that we may receive mercy [for our failures] and find [His amazing] grace to help in time of need [an appropriate blessing, coming just at the right moment].”God has created you and empowered you to be able to know how to steward your sexual desires. Do you believe that? Can you start praying for that?Paul Tripp - “Each pleasurable thing was perfectly created and designed to reflect and point to the greater glory of the one who created it."Are you willing to come to the Lord with open hands and say, “I want Your best for me, whatever that looks like.”“Our identity as people is not dependent upon whether or not we have sex. To be fully human is not to have sex but to fully know and love others like Christ.”  Rescue Plan: Charting a Course to Restore Prisoners of Pornography; Deepak Reju and Jonathan Holmes.Help the show:Support the showAsk a question by emailing usLeave a reviewSubscribe wherever you get your podcastsFollow us on YouTube for behind the scenes and more

The sacred voice of God calls you beloved. Can you hear it? Shame and rejection may be loud in your day to day. For now, let's set down our megaphones of criticism. Consider what it would sound like and feel like and look like to embrace your belovedness, and learn that We Must Love Ourselves to Love Others.Let's get ready.Highlights:Many of us believe that being a good Christian means we focus entirely on others, that we ignore ourselves.But, when we don't care for ourselves, we can fall into patterns of self-rejection.God created you out of love, for love. You have a unique presence here and now. And, God wants to nurture you into wholeness. Believe that you belong and you're enough.Daily Prayer: “God, help me receive your love so I can give it out to others.” Take time to Reflect on your thought life:Do you spend a lot of time comparing yourself to other people? Is it hard for you to feel like you are enough?Do you think your thoughts about yourself are more patient or impatient?As you reflect on your thoughts, are you often kind yourself or are you discouraging and judgemental?Do you come down hard on yourself when you are not coping well or not doing the right thing all the time?What we fill our mind with creates our thoughts. Our thoughts are what create our feelings; our feelings create our behavior, and our behavior our character. - Dallas WillardAffirmations:I am loved.I am accepted.I belong.God you created me and You love me.God, You never leave me and You're always with me.There's nothing I can do to earn your love or lose your love.You encourage me to love you and myself.You have given me power to love and to overcome.Henri Nouwen -  “Over the years I've come to realize that the greatest trap in our life is not success, popularity, or power, but self rejection. When we have come to believe in the voices that call us worthless and unlovable, then success, popularity, and power are easily perceived as attractive solutions. The real trap, however, is self-rejection. As soon as someone criticizes me, as soon as I am rejected, left alone, or abandoned, I find myself thinking, ‘well that proves again that I am a nobody.' Self-rejection is the greatest enemy of the spiritual life because it contradicts the sacred voice that calls us the beloved.”Resources:Song “Belovedness” by Sarah KrogerHelp the show:Support the showAsk a question by emailing usLeave a reviewSubscribe wherever you get your podcastsFollow us on YouTube for behind the scenes and more

The aftershock of betrayal can feel like a cracking in the landscape of your life. Nothing looks or feels familiar anymore.How do you move forward? What are next steps?On this episode of Sacred by Design, we'll tenderly walk through a framework to help you navigate the next steps.Infidelity, Cheating, Betrayal: Each of these words carries a lot of hurt and shame. Whether you just found out your husband's been unfaithful or you found porn on your loved ones phone, you may realize you're left with more than a broken heart. A Spiritual Coach offers a safe space for you to walk through the devastation of sexual betrayal from discovery to healing.Highlights:Because life might feel fuzzy, you're going to wonder: Did I cause this? Can I cure this? How do I control this?Remember, As You Navigate Recovery:You can't Control it.You can't Cure this.You didn't Cause this.You can Choose how to Recover from this.Praying Through RecoveryHelp me to journey beyond the familiar and into the unknown. Give me the faith to leave old ways and break fresh ground with you. Christ of the mysteries, I trust you to be stronger than each storm within me . I will trust in the darkness and know that my times, even now, are in your hands. Tune my spirit to the music of heaven. And somehow, make my obedience count for you. AmenHelp the show:Support the showAsk a question by emailing usLeave a reviewSubscribe wherever you get your podcastsFollow us on YouTube for behind the scenes and more

Try allowing this statement to marinate in your heart for a moment: “God is writing a story for your child that you wouldn't write.”Being a mom is a tough job.Listen in while two moms talk about loving children well. We are with you in NOT underestimating the hurt. Help for Hurting Parents.And we want to encourage you to NOT underestimate the hope. And if you aren't a mom, stay with us and hear how the conversation can be applied to the meaningful relationships in your life.(Make sure to listen at the end for a prayer over you.)Highlights:Parenting PrinciplesPredictable – There are predictable stages we will go through as parents raising children. Let that knowledge be a comfort. Priority – A parent's priority is loving well.Relationship – The most important thing you can bring to your relationship with your child is your own deepening relationship with Christ.Prayer – Don't underestimate the power of prayer. Instead of praying to fix or change a situation or your child, pray in order to reflect God.Examine – A healthy and holy look at our hearts and our souls is essential, but it's also essential to do it accuratelySurrender – Our children need a Savior and we are not Him.Self-Care – You need to tend to your own needs too.Present – Live in the present moment.Phrases that Rob Your Present: If only & What IfHelp the show:Support the showAsk a question by emailing usLeave a reviewSubscribe wherever you get your podcastsFollow us on YouTube for behind the scenes and more

Friendship is fun and discouraging and vulnerable and wonderful and hard. Part of your sacred design is a calling for friendship. You are hard-wired for connection. So, we're devoting this time to both acknowledge the difficulty in friendship and explore the fullness it holds. Friendship offers a type of love that comes alongside you. We hope you hear and see enthusiasm and encouragement in this episode just for you.Highlights:A simple question, whatever season we're in, is where is God calling you to be more known? Look around and notice where God is calling you to be more known.Steps towards Friendship:Pray for God to surround you with good friendsTake inventory of yourself - what do you like?Stay PositiveBe EncouragedQuestions for Meaningful Conversation:-Where are you finding rest right now?-What's making you feel alive lately?-What's saving your life right now?-What sounds fun to you?God gives us this picture within Himself - Father, Son, and Holy Spirit - of community. God within himself embodies community. And we are made out of His love for connection, we are designed for friendship with God. He's instilled that in us.“Triune God, you are as deep a mystery as the sea, in whom the more I seek, the more I find; and the more I find, the more I seek. Father, Son, and Holy Spirit with the light of understanding I have tasted and seen the depths of your mystery and the beauty of your creation. In seeing myself in you, I have seen that I will become like you. O eternal Father, from your power and your wisdom clearly you have given to me a share of that wisdom which belongs to your Only-begotten Son. And truly has the Holy Spirit, who proceeds from you, Father and Son, given to me the desire to love you.” - Catherine of SienaHelp the show:Support the showAsk a question by emailing usLeave a reviewSubscribe wherever you get your podcastsFollow us on YouTube for behind the scenes and more

Maybe you've been on a roll. When it comes to your sexual addiction, maybe you have hit a level of sobriety and then… it all falls apart. OK.So, now what?First, if you're struggling with an addiction like compulsive masturbation or hookups, please know you're not alone. And then stick with us to see how to step out of the shame game and into the life Jesus is calling you towards.Listen in as Kyle walks us through a scripture meditation full of grace and truth just for you.Highlights:This is hard work "The way to relieve the first layer of shame. Because shame can come in layers. Think the first layer is to acknowledge that this is hard. And that doesn't make you less of a christian because it's hard."You're going to be tempted just like any other human being is tempted. Acknowledge this is Hard WorkBe Honest about Your LongingsFind Someone You Can TrustTake InventoryBring this to Jesus - He doesn't want you to do the work aloneEmergency Preparedness Plan: Have Someone to Call Have a Scripture Posted in Key PlacesHave a Worship Playlist"what's happening in your life? What happened in the last 24 hours? Or maybe you have to look at the last 7 days. What's happening inside? Because those can be clues that you realize - Oh, if I have a stressful day this is where I'm going to go. Or if you think you're going to have a stressful day, this is how you're going to respond. This is ultimately a response to something. You're not just doing this because this is what you do. Because your heart is telling you something." Help the show:Support the showAsk a question by emailing usLeave a reviewSubscribe wherever you get your podcastsFollow us on YouTube for behind the scenes and more

Maybe this is Step One for you today. Maybe even just listening to us talk about desire, pleasure, wanting is your first step towards sexual wholeness.We pray it is.Join us as we explore more of our sacred design through the lens of desire. Let's focus the lens a bit more on what Low Desire is, what it feels like, and how to understand it.Please be aware that you may want to protect little ones ears as well as your listening space for the content we'll cover today. Highlights:You may feel ambivalent about your wants and desires. You are not alone. Many of us have turned off our “wanter” because our needs as a child were not met, were not recognized. And so you may have trouble naming or feeling a desire. “Many of us have a truckload of unmet desires in the basement of our heart.” Jay StringerWe may dismiss desire by saying, “I don't have it. I don't have it like he does or she does. Will I ever be desired? Am I desirable? I didn't get affection at home. Vulnerability wasn't accepted. I don't want to want.” These are truthful statements to say and then pray through.Be compassionate to yourself. There is a story that connects desire, lack of desire, too much desire. It's ok to pause and take a look and connect some of the dots in your life.Arousal cycles: Know your cycle, be patient with yourself.Give yourself permission to talk about sex, pleasure, desire.When desire feels “low” to you, consider getting back to basics: How are you taking care of your body? How are you talking to it? How are you feeling? Are you being harsh or condemning? Our bodies are complex. As we come to understand our bodies, we try not to shame our bodies. “I deserve as much sexual pleasure as I can have and I'm worth the time it takes. I might need a back rub or I might just need to take a break but I can ask for this. I matter.” Charity of Restored2MoreHomework: Some Questions to ConsiderWhat do you like?What do you want?What do you wish could be different?Do you know what you like?Can sex be a more comfortable conversation for us? That's our hopeDeeply courageous conversations may feel awkward and uncomfortableWhat are your feelings about desire?What is your relationship with desire?Does the word Desire spark a feeling in you?If so, can you name it? LINKSJay StringerDr. Jennifer Degler WHAT WOMEN WISH MEN KNEW ABOUT WOMEN'S SEXUALITYWHAT WOMEN WISH WOMEN KNEW ABOUT WOMEN'S SEXUALITYRestored 2 MoreHelp the showSupport the showAsk a question by emailing usLeave a reviewSubscribe wherever you get your podcastsFollow us on YouTube for behind the scenes and more

Grab a cup of tea and take a deep breath. Hold the cup in your hands and let its warmth travel through you as you listen.We're unpacking a big word for you on this episode: Codependency.As you're listening and maybe begin to recognize things in your own story, be gentle, be curious, be kind.This is a complicated topic. So, we'll explore it carefully through the lens of story. Codependency can often be traced back to childhood, linking to your relationships with your mom or dad.What you learned to believe about you and your relationship to others back then is having an impact on your relationships now. The hard truth is we can return to what's familiar, even if it's bad for us, when we've grown up in dysfunction.So, let's learn what Codependency can look like and how to grow through it.Recovery is true and possible. Your inherent dignity and honor is sacred by design. Highlights:Codependency is when a person has a serious lack of self-understanding and/or self-acceptance. They look to others to fill that void and to make them worthwhile. What Codependency can look like: If another person needs you, you feel like you have a purpose. You are desperately needing approval from others. You're frustrated if you can't make others happy, if you can't fix them. And you forget yourself and your needs.Codependency is traced back to childhood, often linked to relationships with parents/care-givers.Truth: Recovery is true and possible. Story is a powerful teacher. Know your story. Get in touch with your story. Write it out. Talk to somebody about your story and you'll be able to connect some of the dots.Once you get that awareness from your story work, it explains so much.We all have 4 basic needs: to be seen, soothed, safe and secure. If you were missing those as a child, name the need. This is just saying, Recognizing those needs and where they weren't met is empowering.There is a lot of re-parenting that goes on here with our own selves to our younger selves. And allowing God to be the perfect parent to re-parent us. There's a lot of re-parenting that goes on in codependency.We return to what's familiar, even if it's bad for us when we grow up in dysfunction.If you're unable to express your feelings and your needs, then you're just like, “Whatever you need. Whatever you want, take it.” And it is sexualized in ways that are very interesting. We don't know what else to do. And others can respond to sexual offerings.Questions to Journal:  Be gentle with yourself here. Who did God create me to be?Before the world told me who I was, who am I?How might God want me to live my life?How might God want to live my life with me?How do I look to God for what only He can give me?How could I allow God to heal me and to begin the process of wholeness?Help the showSupport the showAsk a question by emailing usLeave a reviewSubscribe wherever you get your podcastsFollow us on YouTube for behind the scenes and more

As a little girl, in what ways was your mom NOT who you needed her to be? You're probably feeling a reaction to this question in your gut.Whether your reflex is to protect your mom with excuses or you're ready to lash out; you're in the right place.We invite you to listen while we explore the mother wound. Lets define the pain with an understanding that is less about blaming your mom and more about naming the hurt.Identifying a mother wound is to name the wounding so you can move through it towards healing.Lets get started.Highlights:You might come into therapy or coaching saying, here are all these symptoms i'm having. Here are all these ways the pain is coming out sideways. And, hopefully, with a good coach or therapist we can go to the sources of the hurt and find some deeper healing that is waiting for us there.Where was your mom not who you needed her to be as a kid: whether that it being emotionally checked out, even towards neglected? Whether that's from being overbearing and strict, more authoritarian, all the way to abusive? Where were there some ways your mom was not who you needed her to be?Not connecting as a little girl can turn into difficulty not connecting as a woman.And there may be some truth to it as well - that she did do the best she could. And, we can say that with that honor and honesty and still be able to acknowledge that there was some hurt there.By naming some of these wounds, we can honor ourselves.Identifying a mother wound is not to say, my mom is bad. Identifying a mother wound is to name the wounding and then to move through it towards healing.When our wounds cease to be a source of shame, and become a source of healing, we have become wounded healers. - Henri NouwenGrief and anger are necessary and uncomfortable but they're okay. There's a place for them here in this process.We have this literal picture of Christ as our wounded healer who fell a couple times on the way, who needed help to carry a cross that was heavy, that was hard. We see him and we can look to him through this too. To look at our humanness, our moms humanness.. We have Christ to look at as our wounded healer in his humanness.Help the showSupport the showAsk a question by emailing usLeave a reviewSubscribe wherever you get your podcastsFollow us on YouTube for behind the scenes and more

In your heart, what do you believe freedom from unwanted sexual behaviors looks like, feels like?In this episode of Sacred by Design, we'll unpack the many-layered gift of true freedom. God sees you and loves you, right where you are.He is inviting you to freedom of immeasurably more than just staying within practical boundaries.Together, lets redefine freedom.Highlights:Accept the process: we know that god can come in and instantaneously remove whatever the struggle is. And, that's what makes it so much harder to accept that it might be a process and it might look differently than what god thinks.Grieve: take the time to be sad that the process looks different, that freedom wont happen overnight. It isn't gods intention for us to suffer through sin but because of this fallen world, there are some things were going to suffer through. We are experiencing things that the lord did not intend for us to experience.We have an enemy who wants us to think that god is after perfection.Listen for the enemy's voice: see, you cant even make it a week. Whats wrong with you? You're not a good christian. You did all this stuff and its not even working. And then, the voice shifts some more and says, you know what, this is probably who you really are. So why are you fighting it? Or hey, its okay if you do this again.Perfection is not freedom.Freedom is not only the absence of your unwanted sexual behavior but its the presence of Jesus in his power in your life.Remember: sanctification is a process.The fruit of the spirit is self-control. So, when you are allowing the presence of Jesus to be with you then the spirit within you is the one who will help you with the self-control.Romans 6:22 but now, having been set free from sin and having been enslaved to god; you have your fruit leading to sanctification and its end is eternal life.True freedom: you have matured in a way that you have the proper response when temptation comes - not that you don't have to deal with it anymore but that because you have connected yourself to Christ and allowed him into these spaces.Help the showSupport the showAsk a question by emailing usLeave a reviewSubscribe wherever you get your podcastsFollow us on YouTube for behind the scenes and more

You were never meant to be alone. If you find yourself alone because no one seems to understand or because you can't imagine sharing your struggle; listen in.We're exploring the need we all carry for community. There is power within a circle of safety and good listening. And you deserve it.Maybe you've found community and been hurt within it.This is for you too.Highlights:Pain alone is awful. Pain together is bearable.Healing from Trauma requires intimacy because intimacy is where the trauma happened. – Curt ThompsonMaybe you're thinking, “There's nobody else like this. There's nobody else feeling this like me. There's nobody else doing the things I do.” So, let's talk about shame for a bit because we all need community. But, I think that no matter your struggle – whether it's porn or hooking up or if it's anger with God-  don't let shame tell you that you don't belong in community, that you don't deserve community, that you should be alone.Maybe the first time you go to a community group, you just listen. That's great. You're showing up, you're listening. And that's a big step.Phiippians 4:13  I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. v14 Even so, you have done well to share in my present difficulty.Prayer for Community:Hands open to ask God to fill them with community.Hand to your heart to name the pain of your disappointment or sorrow.Hand to your belly to acknowledge the hunger to be seen and heard.Help the showSupport the showAsk a question by emailing usLeave a reviewSubscribe wherever you get your podcastsFollow us on YouTube for behind the scenes and more

You have a story. And, your story holds power. Once you unlock the truth written in your story, you could unlock yourself from cycles of bad habits, bad relationships, and more. If this idea feels overwhelming, listen in as we take the process one line at a time, one chapter at a time. So, what is your story? Grab a pen and paper. Take a deep breath.And, let's begin.Highlights:“One of the bravest things we can do is tell our stories, own our stories and love ourselves through it.” - Brené BrownEmotionally, spiritually, it's really unhealthy for us to be living disconnected from what's true and real about our past and our present.One of the beautiful things that happens in those places that God reveals to us is they become strengths.  When God gets involved with what wounded us and hurt us, He begins to heal us. He also makes it a strength that we can pay forward and impart to others.  That's such a beautiful thing He does.“The limits of my language mean the limits of my world.” – Ludwig Wittgenstein, PhilosopherWhen you consider spiritual coaching,  journaling, or a conversation with a friend, your words feel limited; what a gift to be able to sit with somebody who might have another word to offer you to add to your story, or to build on it or unpack it a little bit more. And to ask good questions. Questions that give you freedom to answer with more than just yes or no, that encourage you to be curious and encourage you to feel safe being curious.When you get in touch with loving that younger self, you have a current, present love for yourself too.Powerful Principle: What we fill our minds with creates our thoughts, our thoughts create our feelings and our feelings determine our behavior. Story Work Ideas for You:Ask God to be with you as you reflect on things that you believe about your story.What are some things that you might believe that are not true about yourself?Think back on being a little child, things that happened that you might have adapted a belief about.You might even believe you have a bad story or no story.You might believe that you're not acceptable if you don't always get things right or that you're not lovable if you don't please people all the time.Just ask God,“What am I believing?”“God, what is true?”Take some deep breaths and listen.Take time to write down a couple of things that God wants you to know are true.Work with a small, close circle of friends in this exercise.Begin to write out what feels logical, significant seasons of your life by age? By schoolRemember Key events, memories, peopleThen tell your friends and listen to their stories. Use the microphone in your Notes app and record yourself telling a story or memory. Play it back and listen for what you needed, for what you believe to be true about yourself because of that reflection.Help the showSupport the showAsk a question by emailing usLeave a reviewSubscribe wherever you get your podcastsFollow us on YouTube for behind the scenes and more

“The talk.” These two small words hold big power!If you've been putting off having the sex talk with your kids because it feels overwhelming; we're easing the load things up for you.What if you could break apart the rehearsed, rushed monologue into a sprinkling of smaller question & answer sessions? If you just felt your shoulders relax, you're in the right place.On this episode of “Sacred by Design,” Rebecca and Andrea set out new ways to talk about sex, sexuality, our bodies and more minus the limitations of one loaded lecture. Highlights:We want to be some of the first people in our kids' lives to talk to them about things starting with where they're at, even at a young age.You can always come back to it. If you say something and then you think more about it, or you want to say more, clarify more; you can always come back to that conversation with your kid. Take the pressure off yourself there too. That it's not a “one shot & you're done” deal. Thankfully. You can come back and add more and continue having rich conversations.We want to encourage you to slow it down, take a breath. If your kid just asked you a question, that's already a win that they're coming to you with the question. That's so good. That is such a gift. And it also helps to clarify what the kid is really asking. VERY GOOD.  Because, in your adult brain you'll connect those dots and skip ahead but asking and thinking where is my kid. Then asking, what do they think about that? What do they know about that? Just to get a sense of what they are really asking for. Truly, how we talk about these things matters. If we are talking from a place of fear and shame, you will communicate fear and shame. So, before even approaching our kids, can we give ourselves a little bit of a talk?We want to talk about sex and marriage but our kids might stay single. They may not get married. So, even using that in our language - “if you get married,” not saying “when.” And, that's so subtle but what that communicates to our kids is to talk more about the fullness and the goodness that they have. That impacts their sexuality, their future discernments but it's not limited to just this one place in life either.Help the showSupport the showAsk a question by emailing usLeave a reviewSubscribe wherever you get your podcastsFollow us on YouTube for behind the scenes and more

If you're a woman who loves Jesus and you find yourself attracted to other women, reconciling your “identity” may feel impossible. The world we live in reduces who we are to the smallest sliver of our sexuality. But there's so much more to you than being a lesbian or straight or a Christian or not. Take some time with us to stop hiding or defining yourself. For now, set aside the condemnation you might be hearing (or assuming) and just listen for the calling. Your identity is Sacred by Design - fuller and deeper than you may realize. Let's begin with a story…HighlightsPart of Kyle's story: “The Lord brought me to a place where I could understand His truth. And, I didn't feel condemned by it. It was like, “I have something so much better for you. And life will be so much better and fuller for you. And, I noticed there was a change in my heart in that. And, so then I had this thing where I wanted to follow Christ.”“It feels like here's this huge part of myself that I have to discard and it was because I had attached my whole identity to being in same sex relationships. So now there was this feeling of my goodness who am I, who am I really. And what I discovered was how much sense does it actually make to attach your identity to your sexuality. Because I'm so much more than that."This isn't about your identity. This is more about what's happening in your heart as opposed to taking what's happening in your heart and making it your identity. This is really an invitation from God to say, “Let's examine what's really happening in your heart.”Try to take the stigma from same sex attraction and ask a different question. Let's think about what's really happening in your heart. Your heart is telling you something. The same sex attraction is not just about being in a relationship with a woman. Your heart is saying there's a legitimate need that you have that has not been met. Help the showSupport the showAsk a question by emailing usLeave a reviewSubscribe wherever you get your podcastsFollow us on YouTube for behind the scenes and more

Everything changed with a ding, with a click on a tab; that's all it took to discover the man you love has been cheating on you. Now what? That's just one of the questions we'll walk through on this episode of “Sacred by Design.” Anne joins Andrea to discuss the ways infidelity leaves you with more than just a broken heart. Together, let's Learn to name the symptoms your body is experiencing, to give words to the screaming questions in your head, to validate your response to a devastating discovery. This is a heavy episode. Grab a cup of cold water and take a deep breath. Let's begin.HighlightsD-Day is also known as Discovery Day: You're caught off guard. You didn't know there was something going on with somebody. And then you start connecting the dots and panic sets in. Name what your body is feeling. Symptoms may include: confusion, irritability, headaches, lack of appetite, intrusive thoughts. This can be expected. You think your life looks one way and all of a sudden it looks completely different.Be aware of getting the right support. The wrong support can almost be re-traumatizing.Healing is possible. It can look like symptoms being reduced. The offending spouse is able to say, “What do you need today? What is this like? I'm here. I'm trying to walk in recovery.” And then, that builds trust because trust has been broken. Safety's been broken in the relationship. Long term observable actions make the biggest impact. And that is what helps the wife begin to heal.ResourcesDr Barbara SteffensThe Association of Partners of Sex Addicts Trauma SpecialistsHelp the showSupport the showAsk a question by emailing usLeave a reviewSubscribe wherever you get your podcastsFollow us on YouTube for behind the scenes and more

If you grew up in the “Purity Culture,” there is work to be UN-done. Teens growing up in this powerful subculture of the church were taught about sex through deep shame and tight restrictions.  Words like Clean and Dirty reduced sexuality as something to say “no” to, but, there is more. Let's bust through some of the myths purity culture taught, while trying to catch a glimpse of the much wider vision God has for us as women. Let's move away from being scared of our design, desires and body in order to embrace our sexuality for what it is; Sacred By Design.(In each episode, we'll be incorporating a Spiritual Practice. In this episode, we'll be naming some ways Purity Culture may have hurt us mind, heart, and body; so we'll be doing a “Body scan.” Please join us.)Highlights:How often did we have that modeled for us; contempt towards others and shame for ourselves? That's hefty. And it's bound up in fear and shame, it misses out on the love and beauty and honor that's intrinsic to how we are as women, to how we're made.What if it was a virtue that we grow in, that we cultivate with God's help. Not just a marker or a status, but something that's continuing. That's a big shift and one that I continue to try to come back to.“Chastity is a free, joyful, wholehearted, and creative giving and receiving of love – in the way that best suits the place we find ourselves (married, single, celibate, dating, engaged, elderly, prepubescent, adolescent, same-sex attracted, sick, disabled, divorced, widowed, etc.” - Father Derek SakowskiHelp the showAsk a question by emailing usLeave a reviewSubscribe wherever you get your podcastsFollow us on YouTube for behind the scenes and more

Desire feels like a hush-hush topic, especially for Christian women.  There's almost an element of shame, maybe selfishness, attached to the word.  In this episode, we're challenging the shame with an open conversation. Understanding that you are sacred by design means carefully looking at and exploring the intricacies of your sexuality.  Your desires are worth exploring. Let's dive in.(Spiritual Coaching sessions usually incorporate a spiritual practice that draws us nearer to God. Look to our show notes for a step by step way to practice what we work through together today.)Highlights:Ask God to help you get in touch with your desires: “What do I really long for? Lord, would you help me sift through them?  What are desires from you? What are the desires I've created?”Every desire, even the distorted ones, reveal something of God and how He created us.“A man who knocks on the door of a brothel is looking for God.” - G. K. Chesterton“The reason we are not able to see God is the faintness of our desire.” - Meister Eckhart “Your desire for more of God than you have right now, your longing for love, your need for deeper levels of spiritual transformation than you have experienced so far is the truest thing about you. You might think that your woundedness or your sinfulness is the truest thing about you or that your giftedness or your personality type or your job title or your identity as husband or wife, mother or father, somehow defines you. But, in reality, it is your desire for God and your capacity to reach for more of God than you have right now that is the deepest essence of who you are.” ― Ruth Haley Barton, Sacred Rhythms: Arranging Our Lives for Spiritual Transformation “Solitude is the furnace of transformation. Without solitude we remain victims of our society and continue to be entangled in the illusions of the false self. Jesus himself entered into this furnace. There he was tempted with the three compulsions of the world: to be relevant ('turn stones into loaves'), to be spectacular ('throw yourself down'), and to be powerful ('I will give you all these kingdoms'). There he affirmed God as the only source of his identity ('You must worship the Lord your God and serve him alone'). Solitude is the place of the great struggle and the great encounter - the struggle against the compulsions of the false self, and the encounter with the loving God who offers himself as the substance of the new self.”― Henri J.M. Nouwen, The Way of the Heart: The Spirituality of the Desert Fathers and MothersSpiritual Practice - SolitudeBegin where you are and with what you enjoy. Choose an activity that allows you to retreat from the front lines of life - gardening, running, journaling, painting, swimming, walking.Keep it simple, take it slow.Try setting a timer for quiet. Take deep breaths in through your nose and out through your mouth. Try beginning your Practice of Solitude by saying “Speak Lord, your servant is listening.” Then listen.If you have any feedback or want us to discuss a certain topic, you can email us at podcast@regenerationministries.org

Welcome to “Sacred by Design” - a conversational podcast by women, for women seeking to get closer to Jesus diving deeper into topics like sexual integrity, relational healing, spiritual health, and so much more.God crafted you with your sexual desire.  Along the way, something may have twisted that gift. Let's get back to valuing your sexuality.Every bit of you is sacred by design.No matter where you are in life and maybe even because of what you're battling; we hope you hear that loud and clear in each episode.Every other week, we'll share our hearts and a spiritual practice to turn what we're discussing into real life change.You're invited!