Podcasts about try softer

In a world that often encourages us to "just move on," healing from past trauma requires courage, vulnerability, and intentional work. In this powerful episode of the Fresh Starts series, therapist Jean Crane offers a compassionate roadmap for those wrestling with painful memories and unresolved emotional wounds. Drawing from personal experience and professional expertise, Jean reveals how individuals can transform their deepest hurts into sources of strength and hope. Whether you're carrying childhood trauma, navigating past betrayals, or seeking emotional freedom, this episode provides a beacon of light and practical guidance for your healing journey.Key Takeaways: Healing Requires Feeling.Trauma healing is not linear.Must process emotions to move forward.Requires intentional work and courage.5-Step Healing Process:Aware: Recognize trauma's impact on your body and emotionsAccept: Validate your feelings without judgmentAttend: Be tender with yourself and seek supportive witnessesAllow: Invite God into your healing journeyAct: Transform pain into purpose and meaningful actionRecommended Resources:"Try Softer" by Aundi Kolber"The Body Keeps the Score" by Dr. Bessel van der Kolk"Anatomy of the Soul" by Dr. Curt ThompsonCall to Action:Seek professional support if struggling with traumaVisit Care to Change website for additional resourcesBe patient and compassionate with yourself during the healing processFollow Care to Change on Facebook  https://www.facebook.com/CaretoChange.org/Follow Care to Change on Instagram @care_to_changeSee our YouTube page hereIf you would like someone to come speak to your group about anxiety, depression or mental health, contact us for more details.If you are struggling and ready to take a step toward freedom, schedule an appt today.

Janell welcomes Aundi Kolber, a Licensed Professional Counselor and author, to explore how the flow of strength helps us move beyond trauma to true flourishing. Aundi reminds us "that seeing resurrection is no small thing."• Aundi explains the "window of tolerance" – the optimal zone where we can feel emotions without being overwhelmed.• Trauma can narrow our window of tolerance, making us feel unsafe even when we're secure.• The "flow of strength" moves us from situational survival responses to integrated strength that combines fierceness with tenderness.• Our nervous systems need "metabolization" to process difficult experiences into long-term memory rather than fragmented triggers.• Practical grounding techniques help orient us to present safety when we feel activated by past trauma.• Practicing simple awareness techniques, such as "I am aware of the light coming through my room," helps regulate our nervous system.• True strength is "the capacity to meet life's challenges," not suppressing emotions or white-knuckling through difficulty.• "We work FROM love, not FOR love" – our value doesn't come from how well we heal.• Self-compassion practices might need to start with small steps if safety feels threatening after prolonged trauma.Explore more through Aundi's books "Try Softer," "Strong Like Water," and "Take What You Need: Soft Words for Hard Days." Order them here.Watch Aundi as she describes what it means "to try softer." Aundi on YouTube.Support the showBegin Your Heartlifter's Journey: Visit and subscribe to Heartlift Central on Substack. This is our new online coaching center and meeting place for Heartlifters worldwide. Download the "Overcoming Hurtful Words" Study Guide PDF: BECOMING EMOTIONALLY HEALTHY Meet me on Instagram: @janellrardon Leave a review and rate the podcast: WRITE A REVIEW Learn more about my books and work: Janell Rardon Make a tax-deductible donation through Heartlift International

In today's episode, "A Prayer to Try Softer, Not Harder, in Your Season of Life," we explore the importance of embracing gentleness and grace during life's various seasons. This heartfelt prayer invites you to let go of the pressure to strive relentlessly and instead approach your journey with compassion and self-care. Through this prayer, we reflect on the beauty of softening our expectations and learning to navigate challenges with a lighter heart. It serves as a reminder that sometimes, embracing vulnerability and patience can lead to profound growth and clarity. Key Themes: Embracing gentleness in personal growth The power of self-compassion and grace Navigating life's challenges with a softer approach Finding peace in vulnerability This episode encourages listeners to shift their perspective, recognizing that trying softer can bring greater peace and fulfillment. By releasing the burden of striving too hard, we can create space for healing and connection. Join us as we seek guidance through prayer, asking for the wisdom to navigate our seasons of life with softness and ease. Let this be a moment of inspiration, empowering you to cultivate gentleness and understanding in your spiritual journey. About Today's Host: Laura Bailey is an author and Bible teacher who encourages women to understand what they believe, why it matters, and how to apply biblical truths to their lives. Her recent book, Embracing Eternity in the Here and Now, explores how the timeless truths of Ecclesiastes help us live more peaceful, purposeful, and plentiful lives today. She lives in Upstate South Carolina with her husband and three young girls, where she serves as director of women's ministries at her church. Her passion is teaching the Bible to women, equipping them to live with an eternal perspective. Invite Laura to speak at your next event or learn more: www.LauraRBailey.com connect on Facebook and Instagram.

For when the day is long. When you are afraid. When you don't know what to say to someone you love. When you feel alone. When you're questioning everything. When you wonder if God is with you.We are talking with the author ofTry Softer, Aundi Kolber, about her new book, Take What You Need: Soft Words for Hard Days. Aundi Kolber is a licensed professional counselor (MA, LPC) and best-selling author of the critically acclaimed "Try Softer" as well as her new book "Strong like Water." She specializes in trauma- and body-centered therapies and is passionate about the integration of faith and psychology.Stay Connected: NEED spiritual direction or coaching that aligns with this podcast? Connect with Cyd Holsclaw here. Join the Embodied Faith community to stay connected and get posts, episodes, & resources. Support the podcast with a one-time or regular gift (to keep this ad-free without breaking the Holsclaw's bank).

What do you really need? And what would it look like to engage life with a deeper sense of agency and self-compassion? Today on Unhurried Living Podcast, Gem is joined by professional counselor and best-selling author Aundi Kolber, whose new book, Take What You Need: Soft Words for Hard Days, invites us to embrace the transformative power of kindness toward ourselves. We’ll explore how early experiences shape the way we suppress our needs, why it’s so hard to name and honor what we truly feel, and how practicing softness can actually make us stronger. In this conversation, you’ll learn: ✨ How our past experiences shape the way we engage with our needs and emotions ✨ Why self-compassion is a powerful (and often overlooked) tool for transformation ✨ A simple prayer or body practice you can use in moments of stress Join us as we dive deep into what it means to cultivate resilience, trust, and a deeper friendship with God—even in the hard places. ________________________________ Aundi Kolber is a licensed professional counselor (LPC), trauma-informed therapist, and best-selling author of Try Softer and Strong Like Water. With a compassionate and holistic approach, Aundi integrates psychology, faith, and neuroscience to help individuals experience emotional healing and resilience. She is passionate about empowering people to move toward wholeness by learning to honor their needs, trust their inner wisdom, and cultivate a life of deep compassion. Through her writing, speaking, and therapeutic work, Aundi offers a refreshing invitation to wholeness—one that prioritizes gentleness, self-compassion, and deep connection with God. ______________________________________________________ Connect with Gem on Instagram and learn more on the Unhurried Living website and her new book, Hold That Thought: Sorting Through the Voices in Our Heads Learn about PACE: Certificate in Leadership and Soul Care Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.

The wholehearted journey isn't always easy, but it is simple. One of the most powerful ways to stay on the path is by intentionally building a table of relationships that reflect God's love and purpose. But how do you discern who belongs at your table?In this episode of the Simply Wholehearted Podcast, I'm joined by Aundi Kolber, licensed therapist and author of Try Softer and Take What You Need. Together, we explore how to wisely identify your needs and build a table of relationships that are life-giving, not draining. Aundi offers practical advice for navigating seasons of healing, reassessing relationships, and creating space for intentional growth.Episode Highlights:How to recognize and honor your emotional and spiritual needs.The impact of shame, fear, and trauma on our relationships.Practical ways to discern who belongs at your table and who doesn't.Why building your table is about grace, not exclusion.How Aundi's new book, Take What You Need, offers bite-sized resources for your journey.Resources Mentioned:Take What You Need by Aundi KolberTry Softer by Aundi KolberConnect with Aundi at www.aundikolber.comIf this episode encouraged you, share it with a friend and leave a review to help others discover the Simply Wholehearted Podcast.RESOURCES FOR YOU:Wholehearted Enneagram Coachinghttps://bit.ly/SWcoachingcollectiveEnnea-what? The Beginners Guide to the Enneagram(free course + printables)https://bit.ly/Enneagram101GuideThe Real History of the Enneagram Course(use code AMY for 40% OFF)https://bit.ly/EnneagramHistoryShould Christians Use the Enneagram? (Amy's book)https://amzn.to/3VB9PrxConnect with Amy:IGWebsite

Have you ever wondered how to transform daily stress into personal strength and resilience? In today's must-listen episode, Dr. Alison is joined by the incredible Aundi Kolber, a trauma therapist and bestselling author of Try Softer. You'll hear the backstory behind Aundi's latest book, Take What You Need and learn tools needed to develop and practice self-compassion. This episode covers: * How to recognize when you're outside of your window of tolerance * What most of us have gotten wrong about developing resilience * The research behind self-compassion and why it leads to unexpected strength * A beautiful metaphor from the Bible to empower and encourage you on your own journey of healing Order Take What You Need here Have a question for Dr. Alison? Leave it here. Find a full transcript and list of resources from this episode here. If you enjoyed this episode, you'll love: Episode 129: Understanding Anxiety—A Step-by-Step Guide to Finding Calm, Advocating For Yourself, and Cultivating Inner Resilience Thanks to our sponsors: This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/BESTOFYOU and get on your way to being your best self. Get ahead of the New Year with a routine that helps you now by going to Seed.com/bestofyou and use code 25BESTOFYOU to get 25% off your first month. Go to Quince.com/bestofyou for 365-day returns, plus free shipping on your order! Music by Andy Luiten Sound editing by Kelly Kramarik While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Have you ever stuffed a feeling? Yeah, it happens for lots of reasons. We are afraid, don't like discomfort, or have been taught that certain feelings are bad. But no amount of pushing down makes the emotion go away. We need to deal with them at some point. Therapist and author Aundi Kobler joins the podcast with why we may be avoiding certain emotions and practical approaches to face them in manageable pieces. There is no need to rush in head first. We can allow our bodies and brains to experience a little at a time. Through this paced approach and safe relationships, we can begin to experience our full range of emotions. We encourage you to listen in as one of the best voices of today gives us her "Try Softer" approach to delving into what is likely scary territory. But remember it is our time to rise and meet the moment. 2025 may just be our year to open ourselves to emotions we have been avoiding. FIND MORE ABOUT AUNDI KOLBER Aundi Kolber's - Website and Instagram Aundi Kolber's books- Take What You Need A FEW THINGS MENTIONED -John 10:10 -Aundi Kolber's books The Try Softer Guided Journey Try Softer Strong Like Water QUESTIONS TO HELP YOU RISE What has kept you from acknowledging emotions you know are there? What would it look like to allow yourself to give those emotions a seat at the table? What is your window of tolerance for those emotions right now? What kind of support do you need to be able to face some of those emotions, and how can you get it? LET'S CONNECT! Did you like this episode? Let us know and leave a review on itunes or share it with a friend. Or message us on Instagram – we'd love to hear from you! Get the Daily Dozen Checklist -12 habits that will immediat

In this foundational episode, we kick off our series, Surviving and Thriving After Trauma, by exploring what trauma truly is—and isn't. As the term “trauma” becomes more prevalent in everyday culture, it's essential to clarify its meaning, dispel myths, and offer tools for understanding and growth. Throughout this series, we want to bring clarity, validation, and encouragement to those navigating the complex impacts of trauma. While it's true that trauma means different things to different people, John, Lynn and Austin will answer the following questions: What is trauma? What is the impact of trauma? What are some myths about trauma? What does the Bible say about trauma? Some of the impacts of trauma include: Emotional dysregulation  Self-protective walls to prevent future pain Internal fragmentation (compartmentalizing emotions) Defense mechanisms in relationships (rationalizing, blame-shifting, projecting) Coping mechanisms (numbing behaviors or perfectionism) Disconnection from the body  This episode will also dispel some common myths about trauma such as: Myth #1: Talking about trauma is a sign of weakness. Myth #2: We are fragile and can't recover from hardship. Myth #3: Trauma affects everyone the same way. Myth #4: There's an easy way to heal from trauma. The truth is that the Bible has a lot of say about trauma, using different words: suffering, hardship, distresses, trials, sorrow and brokenness. Using biblical realities along with psychological insight, this episode will provide essential understanding for those seeking healing from trauma.  Tune in to our next episode: “How do I Heal From Trauma?” and share this episode with someone who might benefit from a deeper understanding of trauma. Resources: Suffering and the Heart of God by Diane Langberg. Healing What's Within by Chuck DeGroat. Try Softer by Aundi Kolber If you enjoy listening to With You in the Weeds we'd love to hear from you! You can email us at withyouintheweeds@thecrossingchurch.com or leave us a review. For more great content from the team you can subscribe to our newsletter at withyouintheweeds.com and follow us on Instagram @withyouintheweeds. 

An essential aspect of our meditation practice involves training ourselves to very consciously and compassionately navigate the truth of constant change, instead of allowing ourselves to become so unconsciously distracted by the swirl of it that we end up missing out on the life we're actually living. This talk explores how we can use our mindfulness practice to discover more kindness, presence, and a sense of safety - especially during the more major periods of change and grief in our lives. It includes a 10-minute meditation at the end.

Join Julie Potiker as she guides you through this meditation focusing on what it is you need - for yourself. She completes the meditation with the poem, "Try Softer", by James Crews."Try Softer", by James CrewsHonor wherever you arewhether the door to your lifehas blown off its hinges,or you find the simplest joysitting in a patch of winter sunon that corner of the carpetwhere you love to stretch.Try softer, not harder—giving yourself a safe placeto land your attention, restingin this threshold momentthrough which wind, snowand light all enter alike.—James Crews"SNAP: From Calm to Chaos", and "Life Falls Apart, But You Don't have To: Mindful Methods for Staying Calm in the Midst of Chaos". Both are available on Amazon.com.Follow Julie on YouTube and Facebook at Mindful Methods for Life.comThis podcast is available on iTunes, iHeart, Blubrry and everywhere you listen to podcasts.

How can we find peace in loss and loneliness during the holiday season? How can we redefine our pace to align with grace during difficult times? In Talk 4 Your Walk, Bridget and Evie addressed the emotional challenges associated with loss and loneliness during the holiday season, emphasizing the importance of processing these feelings with love and support. They highlighted heightened grief that can arise from the absence of loved ones at gatherings and encouraged individuals to engage in ongoing dialogue with God to find healing. By referencing Psalm 34:18 and lament psalms, Bridget underscored the significance of maintaining hope and perspective amidst pain, advocating for a shift towards recognizing truth and the goodness in life. Evie also discussed societal pressures regarding the pace of grief, promoting the concept of "the pace of grace" to encourage individuals to prioritize their emotional well-being over external expectations. Bridget and Evie further explored the complexities of grief, urging respect for individual processing times and the importance of active listening in supporting those who are hurting. Bridget shared personal experiences and cultural practices, such as the Jewish tradition of sitting Shiva, to illustrate effective ways to offer companionship to those in mourning. Additionally, Bridget and Evie reflected on their own healing journey, encouraging others to embrace their identity in Christ and trust in their divine purpose. The episode concluded by advocating for the remembrance of deceased loved ones through storytelling and symbolic gestures, such as leaving an empty seat at the table, while also emphasizing the need for self-care and community support during difficult times. Resources:   @aundikolber6735  Try Softer book - https://www.target.com/p/try-softer-guided-journey-by-aundi-kolber-paperback  Healing What's Hidden - https://www.amazon.com/Healing-Whats-Hidden-Practical-Overcoming/dp/0800740947 Active Listening - https://www.verywellmind.com/what-is-active-listening-3024343 Scripture references: Psalm 34:18; John 1:14

Hey, ya'll. Today I'm sitting down with Caleb Campbell, who's got a story you need to hear. Caleb's journey takes us from the NFL and West Point to finding a whole new way to “try softer” and show up as our truest selves. He'll talk about what it takes to move past the grind and step into a life of self-compassion and authenticity. If you feel like there's got to be more to life than just pushing for the next goal, Caleb's here to show you another way.Let's dive right in.Highlights: (11:20) Caleb's extraordinary football career(25:56) The importance of self-compassion and vulnerability (32:45) The concept of "trying softer" (36:28) Balancing ambition and inner peace (46:43) The role of grief in finding freedom (58:19) Creating safe spacesFind out more:WebsiteLinkedInInstagram: @caleb_campbellX: caleb_campbellQualia Mind - click hereCoupon Code: SHOCKANDYALL (15% off any purchase)Visit Nicole's on demand fitness platform for live weekly classes and a recorded library of yoga, strength training, guided audio meditations and mobility (Kinstretch) classes, as well: https://www.sweatandstillness.comGrab Nicole's bestselling children's book and enter your email for A FREE GIFT: https://www.yolkedbook.comFind Nicole on Instagram:https://www.instagram.com/nicolesciacca/Tik Tok: https://www.tiktok.com/@thenicolesciaccaFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/nicolesciaccayoga/Youtube:https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC1X8PPWCQa2werd4unex1eAPractice yoga with Nicole in person in Santa Monica, CA at Aviator Nation Ride. Get the App to book in: https://apps.apple.com/us/app/aviator-nation-ride/id1610561929Book a discovery call or virtual assessment with Nicole here: https://www.calendly.com/nicolesciaccaThis Podcast is Proudly Produced by Wavemakers AudioMentioned in this episode:www.Neurohacker.com/shockandyall and use the code SHOCKANDYALL to get 15% off your first order

If you feel like you're in survival mode and white knuckling your way through life, then this episode and this book are for you. It was a joy to have Sarah Pascual on the podcast today to talk with me about a book that we both recently read called, Try Softer, by Aundi Kolber, MA, […]

In this episode, Aundi Kolber takes us on a deep dive into the interplay between trauma, attachment, and the wisdom of the body. We explore the crucial distinction between healthy hard work and trauma-driven overwork, and how to discern the difference. Aundi shares powerful insights on the concept of the "window of tolerance" - how trauma can shrink it, and the process of expanding it to allow us to fully feel our emotions. We also discuss the role of the church in becoming more trauma-informed, and the importance of leaders doing their own inner work first. Aundi offers compassionate, practical guidance on the journey of healing and integration - learning to listen to the profound intelligence of the body, and finding the balance between safety and risk-taking. So join us as we seek wholeness and growth, both individually and within our communities. Aundi Kolber is a licensed professional counselor (MA, LPC) and the best selling author of the critically acclaimed Try Softer™️ and her newest book Strong like Water. She has received additional training in her specialization of trauma- and body-centered therapies and is passionate about the integration of faith and psychology. Aundi has appeared on Good Morning America, regularly speaks at national events, and is a frequent guest on podcasts such as The Lazy Genius, Typology, and The Rise and Fall of Mars Hill. As a survivor of trauma, Aundi brings hard-won knowledge about the work of change, the power of redemption, and the beauty of experiencing God with us in our pain. Aundi's Books:Preorder Take What You NeedTry SofterStrong Like WaterAundi's Recommendation:SensitiveJoin Our Patreon for Early Access and More: PatreonConnect with Joshua: jjohnson@allnations.usGo to www.shiftingculturepodcast.com to interact and donate. Every donation helps to produce more podcasts for you to enjoy.Follow on Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, or Threads at www.facebook.com/shiftingculturepodcasthttps://www.instagram.com/shiftingculturepodcast/https://twitter.com/shiftingcultur2https://www.threads.net/@shiftingculturepodcasthttps://www.youtube.com/@shiftingculturepodcastConsider Giving to the podcast and to the ministry that my wife and I do around the world. Just click on the support the show link belowAll Nations Kansas City Trainings:Register for CatalyzeRegister for CPx Support the show

This time on Beyond the Bar, Abby continues her conversation with Jeremey and Michelle King, diving deeper into the convergence of psychology and theology that makes their ministry and their stories so unique and momentous. You can expect a practical, tactical discussion of: - the science behind our stories - big "T" and little "t" traumas - how to use the "four C's"  More about the book Try Softer: https://aundikolber.com/trysofter/ Don't forget to subscribe! For email reminders, follow this link: https://www.redemptioncoffeehouseandroastery.com/podcast-launch-hype Visit our website, read about the episode on our blog, or check out our online roastery by visiting redemptioncoffeehouseandroastery.com Follow us on Instagram and Facebook @redemptioncoffeehouse.roastery Check out Jeremey and Michelle's work at miseminary.com and liverestoried.com Jeremey is the Lead Pastor at Shepherd of the Valley Church in Afton, MN as well as the President of The Master's Institute Seminary in White Bear Lake, MN. He recently completed his doctorate writing his dissertation on Relational Discipleship: an Attachment Theory Approach to Creating Community Within the Church. In his career Jeremey has planted a church, helped launch two nonprofits, and been a barista. In his spare time, Jeremey loves to hunt, play guitar, and roast coffee. Michelle is a Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist, who owns a solo practice called Live Restoried. She has been a partner with her husband Jeremey in ministry for 20 years. They have two teenagers, Gabriel & Neriyah. Michelle's therapy focus has been through an attachment lens and includes EFT (emotionally focused therapy for couples and individuals). She is currently finishing a certification in attachment-focused EMDR (eye movement desensitization reprocessing—a form of trauma therapy). For work or play she loves to travel, find fabulous food, explore delightful coffee shops and go on beautiful hikes.

Sarah talks with Aundi Kolber (therapist and author of Try Softer™ and Strong Like Water) about the interplay between authenticity and attachment. They talk about how our sense of belonging and ability to connect is affected when we carry unrepaired relational wounds. Aundi also offers some hard-earned wisdom on how we can take small steps toward healing while still honoring the experiences that have brought us where we are.Find episode notes and ways to connect with Sarah at sarahewestfall.comDiscover more about Aundi and her work at AundiKolber.comHuman Together is written and recorded by Sarah E. Westfall and is produced and edited by Ben Westfall. Theme music is “Sit with Me” by Sarah Scharbrough.

Season 2 Episode 51: What if an outburst wasn't because of what happened in the moment? What if that moment was just a trigger for something else going on underneath the surface? Join Kim as she dives into an incredibly helpful book by Aundi Kolber. This is PART TWO of a two-part series. Refer to Episode 50 for PART ONE. Aundi Kolber Website: https://aundikolber.com/ ~ Kim Patton's book- ⁠⁠Nothing Wasted: Struggling Well through Difficult Seasons⁠⁠ is a great read for those struggling through hard times. View the book in paperback, ebook, and audiobook: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Books | Mysite (kimpatton.com)⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Check it out at your local library using the Hoopla app! Website: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.kimpatton.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Substack Website: ⁠⁠Author Kim Patton | Substack⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Latest Stories on Her View from Home⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠YouTube Channel⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠- listen to Book Therapy episodes here, too. ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Stay in Touch with Author Kim Patton⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ and get your first freebie! What's your favorite book? ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Let Kim know⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ and maybe she will have it on the show!

Season 2 Episode 50: Aundi Kolber brings an enormous amount of gracious and kind wisdom to the topic of dealing with stress and struggles. She teaches us to open our palms in surrender rather than white-knuckling through life.  This is PART ONE of a two-part series. Stay tuned for the next episode where we wrap up the book! Aundi Kolber Website: https://aundikolber.com/ ~ Kim Patton's book- ⁠Nothing Wasted: Struggling Well through Difficult Seasons⁠ is a great read for those struggling through hard times. View the book in paperback, ebook, and audiobook: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Books | Mysite (kimpatton.com)⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Check it out at your local library using the Hoopla app! Website: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.kimpatton.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Substack Website: ⁠Author Kim Patton | Substack⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Latest Stories on Her View from Home⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠YouTube Channel⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠- listen to Book Therapy episodes here, too. ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Stay in Touch with Author Kim Patton⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ and get your first freebie! What's your favorite book? ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Let Kim know⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ and maybe she will have it on the show!

On this episode: Aaron is tired and cleans the fridge. Nate talks about the dragon of our age. Our Guest: Aundi Kolber - licensed professional counselor, author, speaker, wife, and mom. She shares her journey of being raised in the Catholic church and complex trauma. She encourages us to be present, loving, honoring, and respecting ourselves along the journey as she discusses her books Strong Like Water and Try Softer. Links:   Aundi's Website Aundi's Instagram Psychology Today Aundi's Books: Try Softer Try Softer Guided Journey Strong Like Water Strong Like Water Guided Journey Events: 2024 Samson Summit Sponsor: Life Works Counseling   If you have thoughts or questions that you'd like the guys to address in upcoming episodes or suggestions for future guests, please drop a note to piratemonkpodcast@gmail.com.   The music on this podcast is contributed by members of the Samson Society and www.fiftysounds.com. For more information on this ministry, please visit samsonsociety.com.  Support for the women who have been impacted by our choices is available at sarahsociety.com. The Pirate Monk Podcast is provided by Samson Society, a ministry of Samson House, a 501(c)3 nonprofit. To help support the vision, please consider a contribution to Samson House.

Author and therapist Aundi Kolber joins Deedra and Megan today for a beautiful and compassionate conversation about healing from trauma. Aundi's new book, Strong Like Water Guided Journey, is available for pre-order and releases March 26! You can connect further with Aundi on Instagram, and don't forget that our DG Community members can see a bonus interview where Aundi answers the question, "What's been left unsaid?" Aundi Kolber is a licensed professional counselor (MA, LPC) and the best selling author of the critically acclaimed "Try Softer” and her newest book "Strong like Water." She has received additional training in her specialization of trauma- and body-centered therapies and is passionate about the integration of faith and psychology. Aundi has appeared on Good Morning America, regularly speaks at national events, and is a frequent guest on podcasts such as The Lazy Genius, Typology, and The Rise and Fall of Mars Hill. As a survivor of trauma, Aundi brings hard-won knowledge about the work of change, the power of redemption, and the beauty of experiencing God with us in our pain. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/dauntless-grace-exchange/message

Today I am joined by a remarkable woman. Aundi Kolber is an author, speaker, and therapist, and her books Try Softer and Strong Like Water are insightful, kind, compassionate and so wise. Aundi is a trauma expert and a trauma survivor, and I trust her so profoundly to give sound counsel on a really difficult subject. This conversation is for you if you have been through or are going through trauma, or you know someone who has or is surviving something traumatic. Pretty sure that covers all of us. Listen in as Aundi beautifully reminds us we are not alone and that we are made to be free, whole and flourishing.  Aundi Kolber is a licensed professional counselor (MA, LPC) and the author of the critically acclaimed Try Softer and her best-selling book Strong like Water. She has received additional training in her specialization of trauma- and body-centered therapies and is passionate about the integration of faith and psychology. Aundi has appeared on Good Morning America, regularly speaks at national events, and is a frequent guest on podcasts such as The Lazy Genius, Typology, and The Rise and Fall of Mars Hill. As a survivor of trauma, Aundi brings hard-won knowledge about the work of change, the power of redemption, and the beauty of experiencing God with us in our pain. Find her on Instagram @aundikolber. Visit ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠KimberlyStuart.com/podcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ for more from this episode.

In today's episode, Kelley and Casey are in a slump and talk about how to navigate it. We discuss what it's like when we have no momentum, are in a weird tough season, or aren't seeing much progress on our goals. Been there? You too? Join us as we talk about the solemn reality of being in a slump and as we have some laughs along the way too. Slumps are a part of life and a part of goal setting, but there is so much to learn in these seasons together!    //Time Stamps// 00:00:  Welcome 04:15:  What Kelley is loving 06:22:  What Casey is loving  10:42:  When we get into it – are you in a slump too?  11:50:  Name it & be resilient  14:05:  Talk about it  18:30:  Now time to move!  22:19:  Easy & screen free tasks help  27:00:  Lots of grace in this too  30:56:  Closing thoughts     // Resources Mentioned in this Episode // – Pitbull's Best Playlist  – Carrie Underwood's Hymns Album – 10 Ways to Chase Down Joy  – Try Softer book – Building a Resilient Life by Rebekah Lyons  – Erin Moore Fitness  – Kitchen Cleaner (baking soda & essential oils and Castile soap) – No Cure for Being Human by Kate Bowler    // Connect with Us // — Subscribe to the Cultivate What Matters Podcast: on iOS, go to our iTunes page and click subscribe. On Android, click this podcast RSS feed link and choose your podcast app. If needed, you can copy this link directly into your favorite podcast app (like Stitcher or Overcast). Or follow us on Spotify! You can also subscribe to our podcast monthly newsletter here!    — We would love it if you took a few minutes to leave us an iTunes review to help spread the word about Cultivate What Matters! We want to invite more women into our conversations!   — Visit cultivatewhatmatters.com for delightful resources to help you design a more intentional life.   — Subscribe to the Cultivate What Matters newsletter here and receive free intentional living resources in your inbox.   — Like Cultivate What Matters on Facebook.   — Follow @CultivateWhatMatters on Instagram for all things Cultivate What Matters!

Self Compassion is defined as extending compassion to oneself in instances of perceived inadequacy, failure, or general suffering. It includes accepting our humanity, practicing self kindness and being mindful of our needs. Join Therapist, Teresa Land, and our director, April Bordeau, as they discuss how sexual abuse affects a person's self concept, and what steps we can take to practice self compassion when the affects last longer than we think it should. Recommended resources:Try Softer, by Aundi KolberFocus on the Family website resourcesNational Sexual Assault HotlineNext stepsText us your thoughts or questions at our Care Line: 317-979-7133For more information about Care to Change visit www.caretochange.orgFollow Care to Change on Facebook  https://www.facebook.com/CaretoChange.org/Follow Care to Change on Instagram @care_to_changeSee our YouTube page hereIf you would like someone to come speak to your group about anxiety, depression or mental health, contact us for more details.If you are struggling and ready to take a step toward freedom, schedule an appt today. 

Brian Lee shares his personal story of experiencing spiritual abuse and what led him to start Broken to Beloved, an online summit and support resource for survivors. Register for the Broken to Beloved Summit January 23-26, 2024 HEREBrian Lee is a pastor, coach, and speaker. As a survivor of spiritual abuse and religious trauma, he has spent his time since leaving vocational ministry in 2021 working to provide recovery and resources for fellow victims and survivors. In 2023, he created and founded Broken to Beloved, a nonprofit organization that exists to help other victims and survivors through its Annual Summit and seasonal Cohorts, while also providing trauma awareness and safeguarding practices to pastors, leaders and churches.Based in Richmond, VA, Brian loves to go on outdoor adventures with his family, explore their neighborhood, community, and city, find good parks, enjoy good food, and have fun together. As a coffee snob and addict, he could always use another cup. Transcript (Transcript is unedited for typos or misspellings): Katherine: hey, Brian. Brian: Hey, Katherine. How's it going? Going? All right. How about you? Doing, Katherine: doing well, doing, doing okay for doing okay. Or a Tuesday. Brian: It's just for the end of the month slash year slash the world is losing its mind. Katherine: Right. I know like there's been a lot of moments this week where somebody will say something about Christmas and I'm like, Oh, that's, that's on Sunday.Yes. Okay. We are, we are still, there is still Christmas. Yes. Well, thanks for joining me. I am really excited to talk to you about your summit that you are hosting and curating in January for Spiritual Abuse Awareness Month. At the time this episode comes out, it will already be January. So I'm really excited to hear about that.I got to participate in that [00:01:00] last year. We'll be participating again this year. Great time to just connect with other people working in this spiritual abuse, recovery, religious trauma, recovery space, and also. Spiritual Abuse Awareness Month for folks who are not aware is in January. And we were talking before we started recording about when we first heard about Spiritual Abuse Awareness Month.When, when was it for listeners that you first Brian: heard about it? I just learned about it last year because, and I, but to be fair, I've only been doing this work for about a year now. I wish I knew about it sooner. And I think we were both saying it's like, we can't find who originated this thing. But it's been around for at least 20 years, which to me is crazy.Yeah. I learned about it because of Aaron hung, who's an artist who was doing that whole AZ trauma recovery series on her Instagram page. And I was like, spiritually, it'd be some awareness a month. That's a thing. And then the more I dove into it, I was like, Oh my gosh, this is absolutely a thing. And it's been around a long time.Why do we not know more about it? Katherine: Exactly. I was wondering too, when, [00:02:00] when did that book, the oldest probably. Documented writing about spiritual abuse is probably the subtle power of spiritual abuse. I Brian: think that's what I was thinking. Yep. And that was, I think it was written in the 90s. I want to say, okay, I'm going to look for a publication date because I want to be sure.But I remember reading it thinking I was like, did they just write this like a year ago? And it's like, no, it's been around for a very long time. Yeah, Katherine: yeah, yeah. And then even just like the reality that PTSD. Was not an official diagnosis until the 80s. Brian: Yes. Katherine: Yes. We're very new in this trauma world. Yes.We're all very new to this. This is a new, new territory for all of us. Did you, did you find the Brian: date? Amazon says the publication date is 2005, but that seems late to me. I feel like it was before that. It has a very nice Katherine: cover. Brian: It does! Which is why I feel like it is. So now I'm opening my Kindle to look for the actual copyright date on the inside of it.Yeah, Katherine: maybe that was the most [00:03:00] recent Brian: publication. That's what I'm wondering. Library, look for the yellow book right there. The yellow book. Yeah. That's what I call it. The yellow book. Copyright page. 1991. You were right. Boom. Boom. First time. Katherine: First time. Yeah. So I guess that's the first time that that became something Brian: that.People and for reference to me that feels like 10 years ago, but it's 32 years ago.Yes, I know that tells you how old I am feel like that long ago, but because it wasn't it wasn't Katherine: Yeah, I know because i'm like i've lived Yeah, I've lived longer in the 2000s than I lived in the, in the, in the, in the 1900s, 1900s or so. Brian: It's been a while. How dare you? Yes, we are, we are, we're getting, we're getting up there.We're getting up there. Yes, yes we are. [00:04:00] Speaking of Katherine: age, actually I have nothing. Nothing to say about it. I'm just trying to segue talking about broken to beloved, which is your summit that's coming up and to get us started. I would love to hear whatever you feel comfortable sharing about your spiritual abuse story and how can you, you said that you discovered this word, right?Or this phrase, spiritual abuse, this term fairly recently, when did you, maybe just to start out, when did you first hear the term and did you have an aha moment like many of us Brian: do? Gosh, when did I first hear the term? I honestly don't even know, but it was probably from one of the books that I started reading that validated that experience for me.It might have been K. J. Ramsey's book The Lord is My Courage, and I read it more as a, oh, maybe this will help me in a [00:05:00] dark season, and that's one of my favorite psalms anyway, so, and then I didn't realize she was going to go into their whole spiritual abuse story, and then I am a person who reads all the footnotes and then goes and finds all the primary resources and reads those, so Katherine: that's favorite reader.They were like, we put this in here for you. Brian: Yes. Well, and that's, I love footnotes. So, so because of her, I think is, is how I found the subtle power of spiritual abuse. And then from there, I went down the rabbit hole. I mean, something's not right. Redeeming Power, Church Called Tove, Try Softer, Narcissism Comes to Church, you know, all these books.And now in the last two years, I've read over 40. Five books on that topic, which seems overwhelming because it kind of is, but it all came out of my personal experience, right? So I left my last church in July of 2021. I had been there for just about three years, I think. And I walked into that church.[00:06:00] My wife and I have both moved here saying to each other it would be really nice if this works out And if it doesn't because we've already been hurt before I think we're done with ministry for a while Which feels kind of crazy to walk into a church saying that like this is the last stop Yes.Basically. Yeah. Not indefinitely, not forever, but for a while, we're going to just give this a break because we're done. And so, you know, my story goes back over 10 years now, I think I worked at a Christian college as the marketing, as the graphic designer for the marketing department. I had also attended and graduated from that college, which isn't unusual.But it was a completely different experience being a student there than it was being on staff there. And I didn't know what to do with the cognitive dissonance of looking at leaders that I respected and admired Who seemed to preach the gospel and talk about servant leadership and humility and all these things But then I would be sitting in meetings I was like I don't know who this person is who is so [00:07:00] angry and belittling and demeaning and authoritarian and all these pieces And so finally leaving that environment I need to ask you a Katherine: question, just like following up on that, because I feel like that's such a common theme of like the, what you preach and what you teach is not who you are.And I just, I just hear that all the time. And just was talking to someone about the other day about her father, who was a pastor and he. He was a pastor and he would preach these things about like parenting and then he would like not be that type of parent. And I'm just curious from the experience that you had what, what is your take on that of like, why, like, you obviously know what's right.Where, where is this disconnect happening because you can preach it enough to convince people then what's happening here. What's your Brian: [00:08:00] take on that? My take for the last two or three years now has been, it all boils down to the need for power and control. And this message is going to work and this message is going to work.And so the secondary or maybe even tertiary word that comes out of that is optics. It all comes down to optics and the way things look and appear so that I can maintain power and control. And so if I can maintain this image of, then I will continue to have power and control and influence over these people as long as they don't see behind the curtain.And if they do see behind the curtain, it doesn't matter because I control them anyway because I'm their boss, right? Or because I am their spiritual authority or leader or whatever it is. So I, it's wrecking. Man, there's so many ways I can go so the last pastor I had would often say things like when I first started.It's like you have to recognize the hats that you wear when you walk into a room. So I know that I'm the [00:09:00] pastor. So I know that there's a power dynamic. So I had to be aware that when I'm leading a conversation or that there's going to be a shift in something somewhere. But then this is the same guy who would absolutely manipulate that power dynamic.Yeah, or pretend that he was the servant or the victim or the low man on the totem pole is like you don't get it both ways. Like so. So I know that you cognitively know these things to be true. And yet I see you do the polar opposite. And then use those things to twist them to your advantage. Yes. In the way of whether ignorantly or intentionally, both are worse, harming someone else in the process.Katherine: Yeah, and that is the crux of spiritual abuse and why it is devastating and so damaging and so complex and so confusing is like these people are preaching these good messages that they are aware are quote unquote good messages, but [00:10:00] using that intentionally to manipulate and control people. So then these good messages.suddenly become infused with this thing that makes us just terrified. Brian: Poison. It's poison. Katherine: Yeah. And we're just, we're just like, I can't even engage with this, even though some of this stuff is really good, you know, that. Yeah. Yeah. And, and, and yet it just causes this. Massive cavern of, of just fear and doubt and trauma.Brian: Yes, I think that's where a lot of the confusion comes from, too, is because, because so much of it is truth, right? Or is based on quote, good intentions or scripture or whatever it is, but then you see it manipulated and twisted. So now you don't know what to believe or what's true or good anymore.Right, and you can't Katherine: trust good people who are saying absolutely, it's like absolutely walk into a room and you're like, are they good or [00:11:00] not, you know, just, just being able to trust, even just what people say and like, and then you're kind of in evangelicalism and church culture, you like you walk into a church and and everyone's believing the same thing.Well, Are, are they, are they, are we, are we all on the same page here? I talked to someone the other day that like teaches their children just because someone is a pastor doesn't mean they're interpreting scripture actually accurately. And I was like, okay, that's a very wise thing to teach your child, but so sad that you're saying.has led you to teach that to your child. Brian: Yeah. Yeah. Same. Well, and I've heard, I've heard parents and other people just like, because normally we instruct our kids to pay attention or listen to the grownups. And I've heard other grown up, other adults and friends say, it's like, actually, that's not always true because grownups won't always tell you the right thing to do, or they might be wanting to hurt you in some kind of way.And it's like, I hate that we have to teach our kids that, but it's, that's [00:12:00] the way of the world today. And it's just really unfortunate and sad and grieving. Katherine: Yes. When you're allowed to be afraid of Santa Claus. Yes. Brian: Oh my gosh. Oh my gosh. Yes. That's okay if you're afraid. So trust your gut on that one.Yeah. So anyway, so I went through that experience three times in three different environments. Three times. The first time, not necessarily in a row, but very close. So the first time at a college with an older leader, mentor, figure, admired. Second time with a, someone who very young and then I had a short break for about two years and then ended up where I was now with someone who's basically my contemporary.But it's just getting it, getting hit from all sides of it. And I had had enough. So when we left, when I left the church in July of 21, I was like, I am absolutely done for a while and I've got to figure all of this out because I don't know why it keeps happening to me, you know, a result of all the gas lighting is like, it must be my fault.So it must be something wrong in the denominator. [00:13:00] Exactly. And we had already been seeing our counselor therapist for a while. So we just kind of dove into the topic head first. It's like, I just, I'm in a tailspin. I don't know what to do. Like, I don't know which way is up right now, and I just help. Just help.And she, she is a trauma informed therapist, which was extreme. I'm grateful for, because that's not why we started going to her. But that helped to process all of this stuff and then finding these books and finding these resources and chasing the rabbit holes got me to the place was like, okay, I can name spiritual abuse.I can define it. I can name trauma and define it. And after about a year and a half. Of doing that work and processing through the trauma and the abuse. I was like, I think I might be in a place where I feel like I'm doing better and I'm not doing great, but I'm definitely better than I was. And I think I actually have a framework for how I want to help other people because everywhere around me, I see people dealing with the same thing.And I hate that we're all here. Katherine: [00:14:00] Absolutely. Did you have, when you were like doing research, did you have something that you, how are you defining it at the time? You just calling it church hurt. What were you Googling? Brian: What were the things that you? Yeah. Well, yeah. I mean, I think it starts with church hurts.That's kind of the phrase that people hear. And then once I got my brain around the term spiritual abuse, I was like, Oh, okay. And then of course everyone quotes, the body keeps a score. So I forced myself through that one. And then through that one learned, learned trauma and then found books on religious trauma and started doing that whole thing.So just coming up with definitions and just kind of collecting all these in a master Google doc for my brain and figuring it out from there. Katherine: Yeah. Yeah. And then at what point did you say? Yeah. So you said that I want to help people and help make sense of this. Where did the vision for broken to beloved come from?Cause last year was the first year, right? April, wait, I guess that's this year, right? [00:15:00] Brian: Yeah, it is. Yeah. April of this year. Yeah. 20, 23 at the time. So it didn't start as broken into beloved. It started as a six week cohort, which I call through, which is based on the children's book. Going on a bear hunt because we can't go around it.Can't go over it. You just got to go through it. Right. And that came up from a friend, Amy. I was speaking at her summit. She does an Enneagram summit and I also do Enneagram coaching, but she said, what do you want to talk about? I was like, this sounds crazy, but. Do you want to talk like, can I talk about like spiritual abuse?She goes, what? We have to do that. And so it just got all my wheels turning and then that's what kind of turned into the cohort. So I, I created a framework for a six week cohort to lead people. You know, and the story of that is like, because I over identified myself as broken for so long, I literally walked into this last church interview with the pastors and elders and said, Listen, they were like, hey, why should we hire you?And my answer was, well, actually, you [00:16:00] don't want to hire me because I'm damaged goods. Let me just disqualify myself to you now because you don't want me because I'm broken and I'm really damaged. So you don't want me here. And so I recognize that I was wearing that as my identity. And so through KJ Ramsey's book, through all these other books that identified Wade Mullin, something's not right and all these other things, it's like, Oh, okay, so maybe I'm not the problem.Yeah, maybe there's stuff broken in the system and it's not to say I'm not blameless for a lot of things because I certainly am but it was Developing a framework for what does it look like to move out of my brokenness and to actually name the things that have happened to Me because we can't heal what we can't name.So naming things is really important Recognizing where I am in time and space so that I can pull myself to the present and recognize when I'm safe when I'm not When I'm triggered or activated when I'm not And then using all the polyvagal theory stuff that she includes in there. And then [00:17:00] recognizing how embodiment is so important and breath practices and mindfulness things and moving forward so that we can recognize, identify, and then embrace our belovedness as our actual identity, not our brokenness.So the cohort came first in October of 2022. It went really, really well. I did it again in January of 23, which is the beginning of the year that we're recording. And so coming out of those two cohorts, I was like, man, it seems like there's an audience for this and a need for it. And all the books that I have read have done a really great job defining terms for me.They do a good job of validating experiences and telling stories. I've read almost nothing that offers what now? Mm hmm. Mm hmm. Like, I just don't know what to do. Like, okay, great. Thanks for sharing the information, but what do I actually do now? Cause I still feel stuck. So the whole point of the broken to beloved summit, which came from the bookends of the cohort of starting broken and ending beloved [00:18:00] was to invite all the authors that I had read and the resources that I had found online, get them in one place and just say, great.What now? What now? What now? And to make it practical, right? So the whole tagline I use for everything is finding a pathway toward healing and wholeness. When Katherine: you were describing yourself as broken when you would walk into these interviews, what did that mean to you? Was that yeah, expound on what that meant and then how is that showing up for Brian: you?I don't know if I've ever been asked that question. I just felt broken. Like my whole brain was. I'm just unsure of what to believe or what was right or wrong. I'm also an Enneagram One, which is very right wrong, black white minded. I always think I have to do things the right way. So for me It was always a, well, if I was fired from this place, or if I had to leave because I was so toxic, what did I do wrong?But other people [00:19:00] loved me, and it was just this group, so maybe it was, maybe it was them, but maybe it was me, but I'm not sure, and I think I'm really good at my job. And people tell me I'm good at my job, but the pastor just told me I'm not and that he needs to replace me because the board told him so even though they've never given me feedback in any of my reviews that anything needed to change when I've been asking for them for years.So it's, it's all that kind of stuff that in your brain messes with you. It's also the the second place that we left, we were friends with. The pastor and his wife, we graduated together. We were alumni together. I was like, we thought we were friends. We hung out at each other's houses. And then to do something like that and to feel so stabbed in the back, really It was a, it was just kind of whiplash, right?It's like, what, what, what happened there? And so what's wrong with me and what's wrong with my relationships? Cause I thought we were okay, but apparently not because then this happens. So walking into this last interview to just say, Hey, I'm damaged goods. I'm broken. I mean, that's really what it was. And then I had [00:20:00] had two years at another church where I.Genuinely thrived for two years. And I was like, Oh, there's actually a different way to do things. Yeah. And I didn't realize that. And then we experienced more trauma. One of our best friends passed away tragically in a car accident. And so that threw everything into tailspin and dealing with the aftermath of that.So it was just kind of like, Hey, we're really not in a good place right now for a transition or for something to change. And yet I felt so. Bound is not the right word I'm looking for, but I'm going to use it by the whole idea of. If God wants to do something here, I don't want to close the door and say no.And I don't say that to over spiritualize anything or myself, but it's just the words that came out of my mouth at the time. So we just kind of kept going with the process. And I remember the first several weeks slash months of having started this job, just trying to be really vulnerable with people and honest, just like, listen, I, I don't come here pretending I'm perfect in any [00:21:00] way I'm really broken right now and we need help. Just so you know that, and I might have some answers or help for you, but I'm coming at it from a position of brokenness and the more I do this work, the more I recognize how okay that really is.Katherine: Yeah, and it kind of sounds like as you're describing. What brokenness was to you? It sounds like trauma, but it sounds like internalized trauma of this is somehow my fault, like these outside messages and this trauma that I'm experiencing is due to something. Brian: Yeah. Potentially. Well, and isn't that part of the toxic theology that a lot of churches teach is like that you are responsible for your sins and how they label everything as sin.So if something bad happened in your life, it must be your fault because you weren't holy enough. You didn't pray enough. You didn't whatever [00:22:00] enough. Right. And it's like not. Not taking into account any of the effects of abuse where the abused actually did nothing. It's like when a woman gets raped, Oh, what were you wearing?How did you contribute? What perfume do you have? It's like, come on, really? But that's where I was mentally, emotionally, all the things. Katherine: Yeah, and that thin layer of, like, you must be sinning or God is, like, sanctifying you and is allowing these happen, these things to happen to, like, grow your faith or, you know, and, like, getting to that place, naming, as you said, getting to that place where you just, you're just able to point out it and to say this was not okay, period.Like should never have happened. We should never should never have had to go through this like this was never an okay thing when you got to your church, the last church and you like was this the church that you were [00:23:00] saying I am broken and I am damaged goods. Yes. And then that Brian: obviously didn't go did not pan out.Was Katherine: that used against you Brian: was what part used against me? The fact that you were Katherine: open about your brokenness. Brian: Yes and no, I would say by the pastor. Yes, because I think in the kindest way I can say this possible, he's a master manipulator. So I think he knew us coming in and me saying those things up front and they pitched themselves very much as, oh, well, we are a healing church.We're a place where people come so they can just receive and sit back and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Right. And but then, you know, six months, two months, four months, two years later, they're saying, Oh, you're still praying for that thing. You're not healed yet. Are you not over that yet? Right? It's that kind of stuff.And so those are the major red flags that go up. It's like, maybe this is not such a great place. Katherine: Absolutely. Absolutely. So pitching themselves as a healing place and then, and then not. [00:24:00] Not so Brian: much. Yeah, maybe you used to be but not so Katherine: much today. How would you say? broken to beloved is Creating a space that you would say is just like healthier than that Like how how are you seeking to make that a healthy space for Brian: people?Mm hmm. That's a great question. Thank you I don't know cuz I'm still figuring it out. One of the first words that comes to mind is honesty and trying to be honest about Whatever it is that we are feeling or naming or experiencing because one of the things I've learned is that when we try to push away or repress any of those things, we often get ourselves in trouble because it's something is trying to be expressed there.And it doesn't mean that we. Allow rage or ranting to take place just because because there are safe places to do to do that too, but probably not within a general community, right? Within an intimate relationship, [00:25:00] maybe, but not within a an open space. So I think the honesty piece is one of them. I think the openness is another.Another word that comes to mind is kindness. I think there was an interview I did last year with David Gate, who does all that kind of typewriter poetry, which I love. And he said something that really has stuck with me ever since. And it's this idea that you can have all these progressive, or not progressive, all these fundamentalist Christians.Or conservatives or evangelicals or whatever you want to call them who go through this process of abuse and or trauma and then deconstruction and then leave the church or whatever it is, but they don't actually examine or change anything and they just switch over to progressive liberalism or progressivism or whatever it is, and they're still fundamentalists at heart.Absolutely. And I think the fundamentalist piece, the certainty that so many people carry. Doesn't make room for curiosity [00:26:00] and kindness which I think embodies a lot of what I'm trying to do is to be open and curious and kind because I also see voices online who just come across as angry all the time.It's like, I get it. There's room for that. I'm angry too. But, and there are times that I drive by the church and I'm like, can we just burn it all down? Sure. Right. I feel all that, but it doesn't, I don't feel helped or served by it. Yeah. The Psalms, when I did an interview this morning, and the Psalms are 75 to 80 percent imprecatory and lament, so there's plenty of room for honest, raw emotion, but there's also a time and place for it, and it doesn't have to be public, and I don't, actually, here's, here's a good thing, I don't need everyone to agree with me.Because your experience is your own and you need to figure out how you're going to process it. Here's how I've processed mine and I'm not going to prescribe anything to you that you should do it this way too. But I'm going to approach it with openness [00:27:00] and kindness and curiosity and hopefully safety.Yeah. Katherine: Yeah. And I think like that. Openness, kindness, curiosity can create that safety and, and, and having that space where people can come on their own journey and find their own, their own, yeah, like find their own, their own path. And, and, and that's also just sort of like, Anti the opposite of what we experienced in the church of like, only me, the person with the, you know, title can tell you what is helpful and what, what God is really saying and putting that agency back into each individual person is sweet.Not what we were taught church and we were taught not to trust ourselves in the church context. And so, yeah, I love that, that openness, openness, kindness, and curiosity. I love it. What are some of your hopes and [00:28:00] dreams for the summit?Brian: I hope that it's helpful. I hope that it feels practical for people. I hope that people walk away with a sense of, I mean, the three words I use most often are hope, healing, and wholeness. And I say that knowing that there is real harm done when others try to prescribe a timeline to your healing. That healing is not a destination, right?And I think Laura Anderson just wrote about this in her book. It's like healing is not a destination. It's not an arrival point. It's something that we are just Doing probably for the rest of our lives. So when I say that, it's not like, Hey, show up to the summit and you will be healed. Absolutely not. But I do hope it gives you really practical tools that you can walk away with and say, Oh, this thing will help me.Right. This thing will help me to take a step. And so we had 1, 200 people register last year, which blows my mind for trying something for the first time. [00:29:00] So I it would be great to have as many or more. Not because of numbers, because God knows I hate numbers because so many churches are driven by it. But the idea that people are helped.And and moved in that direction of healing and wholeness and hope, I think so many of us who go through this kind of abuse or trauma walk away feeling so isolated, broken, like you're saying, with a lack of agency or not empowered that my hope is that you walk away with a sense of hope, feeling empowered and a sense of agency to take control of something in your life because so much of it has been stripped away from you.I think those are the kinds of things I hope for. Yeah, Katherine: absolutely. And I think even just the reality that we can like walk into a space and it's, you know, 18 or whatever speakers all speaking on something similar. And so there's this awareness that like, at least all of these people have, have, have some experience with this thing.I've gone through this or understand this and that [00:30:00] validation of like, yes, oh, people are talking about this. And people see this as something that is really important and causes a lot of pain and deserves attention, deserves an entire summit. I think that that in itself is, is So validating and so helpful.What's, what is some information about this? What can you tell us about how folks can find the summit register if they're ready for it?Brian: Sure. We do have dates. We will be January 23rd through 26th. Last year was 3 days. I learned that was too short to pack that many speakers talking about trauma and abuse. So I'm spreading it out over 4 days and I'm inviting less speakers. So it's not so overwhelming every day. If you go to BrokenToBeloved. org slash subscribe, you can join my mailing list, which is where I'll probably send information first. Or you can just follow me on Instagram, which are where I post when I have time to[00:31:00] at BrokenToBeloved.Okay. All Katherine: right. I'll all of this information in the show notes Brian: so folks can read it. Thank you. Katherine: And I'm very excited to be there and to be a part of it, watch all of the speakers. And is there anything else that you want to share about broken to beloved the cohort. Your journey, Brian: anything? No, I, I mean, we are like you, a 501 C three.So if you're looking for someone to support or an organization, this is the work that we're trying to do. So you can just go to same broken to beloved. org and you can find all the stuff there. I'm super grateful for you and your work and having stumbled across you last year. I, I love and support the stuff that you're doing as well.Grateful to have you at the summit twice now. Um, And just love doing the work with you. Katherine: Yeah, so I'm glad to partner in this with you as well. Thanks so Brian: much. Thank you.

Ever feel like you need a label across your forehead that reads FRAGILE: HANDLE WITH CARE! In big read letters? It's hard to imagine that we can be strong enough to handle all the suffering around us. In this heartening and thought-provoking conversation, Katherine sits down with therapist and author Aundi Kolber to reimagine what it means to be strong and understand how God made our bodies to adapt to heartbreak, hardship, and hurt. What We'll Cover: - What the incarnation of Christ in a human body tells us about God's design for our own bodies - Just how far we can expand our definitions of “strength” - Healthy ways to process our own trauma responses without being defined by them Show Notes: Aundi Kolber: https://aundikolber.com/ Strong Like Water: https://aundikolber.com/strong-like-water/ Try Softer: https://aundikolber.com/trysofter/ Suffer Strong by Katherine & Jay Wolf: https://hopeheals.com/books The Window of Tolerance from Dr. Dan Siegel, MD: https://www.psychologytools.com/resource/window-of-tolerance/ Gabor Maté on trading belonging for authenticity: https://youtu.be/l3bynimi8HQ?feature=shared Heather Avis: https://www.heatheravis.com/ *** Want a little hope in your inbox? ⁠⁠Sign up for the Hope Note⁠⁠, our twice-a-month digest of only the good stuff, like reflections from Katherine and a curated digest of the Internet's most redemptive content: https://hopeheals.com/hopenote Get to know us: ⁠⁠Hope Heals⁠⁠: https://hopeheals.com/ ⁠⁠Hope Heals Camp⁠⁠: https://hopeheals.com/camp ⁠⁠Mend Coffee⁠⁠: https://www.mendcoffee.org/ Instagram⁠: https://www.instagram.com/hopeheals/

Welcome to another episode of Restoring the Soul with Michael John Cusick. Today, we dive into the depths of emotional and psychological healing with Aundi Kolber as we explore the intricate interplay between somatic experiences, Internal Family Systems, and the transformative power of embracing our emotions with grace and strength.In this episode, we delve into Aundi's remarkable insights on somatic awareness, the body's intuitive sense of safety, and navigating challenging emotions with curiosity rather than criticism. Aundi shares how her bestselling book, "Try Softer," has influenced the lives of many and how her journey continues in her latest work, "Strong Like Water," an exploration of strength as a dynamic and adaptable force, much like the nature of water itself.Join us as Aundi takes us through a compelling conversation about validating emotions, employing grounding techniques, and understanding trauma's impact on our perception of safety. Together, Michael and Aundi discuss how podcasts like ours serve as a beacon of connection and healing, how faith intertwines with psychological well-being, and the importance of integrating our whole selves for a compelling journey toward healing.CONTACT RESTORING THE SOUL:- Tweet us at @michaeljcusick and @PodcastRTS- Like us on Facebook- Follow us on Instagram & Twitter- Follow Michael on Twitter- Email us at info@restoringthesoul.com Thanks for listening!

A while ago I heard a sermon titled “Are you humble enough to be carefree?” Honestly, my answer was a resounding “no”. I'm not carefree, I'm careful because I'm prideful. Instead of taking my feelings to God and allowing Him to help me process them, I find myself choosing to numb out.  Isaiah 26:3 (MSG) says, “People with their minds set on you, you keep completely whole, Steady on their feet because they keep at it and don't quit.” We can trust God; He is a sure thing. When we take what we're feeling to Him, He is faithful to make us whole. When allow ourselves to experience negative emotions without numbing them, we won't get stuck in them. Over time, feeling becomes easier and we can become fully ourselves allowing us to be present with the people around us. #219: Try Softer with Aundi Kolber Action Steps: Be on the lookout for an uncomfortable feeling to surface, decide ahead of time to stay present with it and see what changes Sponsors: Get 15% off OneSkin with the code STRUGGLEWELL at https://www.oneskin.co/ This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/STRUGGLEWELL and get on your way to being your best self. Connect with Emily: website | Instagram | Facebook

On this week's episode of the podcast, Aundi Kolber, an author and a licensed therapist joins us. Aundi has a unique way of articulating comfort one can find through processing trauma.Here's what you will hear on this episode:- Aundi's journey as a therapist- Aundi's books Try Softer and Strong Like Water- The Window of Tolerance and honoring it- What it means to survive and the purpose it can serve- Societal expectations as a mom/woman and how that impacts trauma- Learning how to honor your own experience- Complex trauma versus shock/single incidence trauma- Welcoming self-compassion and internal softness as a resourceGuest Bio:Aundi Kolber is a licensed professional counselor (LPC), speaker, and author of the groundbreaking book Try Softer and its companion, The Try Softer Guided Journey. Aundi is the owner of Kolber Counseling, LLC, established in 2009. She has received additional training in her specialization of trauma- and body-centered therapies, including the highly researched and regarded eye movement desensitization and reprocessing (EMDR) therapy.Aundi is passionate about the integration of faith and psychology, and is a sought-after expert in both faith and secular settings. She regularly speaks at local and national events, and she has appeared on Good Morning America as well as podcasts such as The Lazy Geniuswith Kendra Adachi, Typology, and The Next Right Thing with Emily P. Freeman. Aundi reaches an audience numbering in the tens of thousands via email and social media. You can find her at @aundikolber on Instagram and Twitter or on her website at aundikolber.com.As a survivor of trauma and a lifelong learner, Aundi brings hard-won knowledge around the work of change, the power of redemption, and the beauty of experiencing God with us in our pain. After years of longing to be closer to water, she and her family relocated from the majestic mountains of Colorado to the stunning lakes of Michigan. She is happily married to her best friend, Brendan, and is the proud mom of Matia and Jude.For more birth trauma content and a community full of love and support, head to my Instagram at @birthtrauma_mama.Learn more about the support and services I offer through The Birth Trauma Mama Therapy & Support Services.

We're so pleased to be joined by therapist and author Aundi Kolber, known for her acclaimed works "Try Softer" and, most recently, "Strong Like Water." As a licensed professional counselor specializing in trauma- and body-centered therapies, Aundi's expertise is deeply informed by her personal journey of healing from complex childhood trauma.  Aundi candidly shares her personal journey of healing, from confronting the profound extent of her past trauma and discovering healing methods that nurture a sense of safety, self-care, and self-compassion. She shares: “Part of my own journey, and I think my writing, I hope, I pray, that the trajectory of my writing is about that to live into these values actually has required me to get softer so I could get stronger.” We invite you to join Dan, Rachael, and Aundi on this week's episode of the Allender Center Podcast, available on your favorite listening platform. 

Aundi Kolber is a licensed professional counselor (MA, LPC) and the best selling author of the critically acclaimed Try Softer and her new book Strong like Water.   She has received additional training in her specialization of trauma- and body-centered therapies and is passionate about the integration of faith and psychology. Aundi has appeared on Good Morning America, regularly speaks at national events, and is a frequent guest on podcasts such as The Lazy Genius, Typology, and The Rise and Fall of Mars Hill. As a survivor of trauma, Aundi brings hard-won knowledge about the work of change, the power of redemption, and the beauty of experiencing God with us in our pain.

Aundi Kolber is a licensed professional counselor (MA, LPC) and the best selling author of the critically acclaimed Try Softer and her new book Strong like Water.   She has received additional training in her specialization of trauma- and body-centered therapies and is passionate about the integration of faith and psychology. Aundi has appeared on Good Morning America, regularly speaks at national events, and is a frequent guest on podcasts such as The Lazy Genius, Typology, and The Rise and Fall of Mars Hill. As a survivor of trauma, Aundi brings hard-won knowledge about the work of change, the power of redemption, and the beauty of experiencing God with us in our pain. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Our emotions and feelings can take up a lot of space at the table. There may have been times we've gotten in trouble for them, either because we've shared too much and regretted it later, or we've been scolded or blamed for being too sensitive or too much or too something. That's when we've tended to label our feelings as not okay. But this is not the only story there is. How do our feelings impact our ability to make wise decisions and what good role can they play? Listen in. LINKS + RESOURCES FROM THIS EPISODE: Subscribe to The Soul Minimalist on Substack The Journey Toward Wholeness by Suzanne Stabile Try Softer and Strong Like Water by Aundi Kolber Episode 170: Try Softer with Aundi Kolber Episode 213: How to Make Embodied Decisions with Dr. Hillary L. McBride The Quiet Collection app Order The Next Right Thing Guided Journal Grab a copy of my book The Next Right Thing Find me on Instagram @emilypfreeman Download the transcript

“Our past hurts mixed with our present pressure often dictate our future fear.” Counselor and author Sissy Goff has watched this reality play out hundreds of times through the decades as she councils chidden as well as their moms and dads. So often parents are willing to get help for their anxious children while not addressing their own anxieties. In our conversation today, Licensed Counselor and author Sissy Goff explains that anxiety is contagious, and the worries we see in our children can often come from our own unaddressed anxieties.    In our conversation today, we talk about the rapid growth of anxiety as major struggle for more and more children and adults. Sissy shares insights from her new book, The Worry Free Parent: Living in Confidence So Your Kids Can Too. We discuss The difference between worry and anxiety The way unaddressed past hurts can bleed into our present parenting How the amygdala is contagious Practices to deescalate when anxiety is taking over The importance of the following advice: Try Softer, Trust Your Gut, and Trust God How the hope of the resurrection re-centers us on our darkest days   Bio Sissy Goff, LPC-MHSP, has worked as the director of child and adolescent counseling at Daystar Counseling Ministries since 1993. She speaks to parents and children's ministers across the country and is a frequent guest on media outlets such as Southern Living, NBC Nightly News, CNN, Good Morning America, Focus on the Family, That Sounds Fun, Family Life Today, Fox News, and many more. Sissy Goff is the author of 13 books including her latest, The Worry-Free Parent. She co-hosts the chart-topping Raising Boys and Girls podcast, with fellow Daystar Counselor David Thomas. The podcast just celebrated more than 5 million downloads to date www.RaisingBoysandGirls.com   Resources mentioned: Instagram: @RaisingBoysandGirls  The Worry Free Parent: Living in Confidence So Your Kids Can Too: https://amzn.to/3NZCBOm Are My Kids On Track: The 12 Emotional, Social, and Spiritual Milestones your Child Needs to Reach: https://amzn.to/3PL4bR0 www.RaisingBoysandGirls.com Episode 217: Worry, Anxiety, and Emotional Vocabulary with Sissy Goff Support Let's Parent on Purpose through your Tax Deductible Giving Join my Things for Thursday Email List and get a free Marriage Snapshot Tool and Fun Family Conversation Ebook! Connect with Jay: YouTube: https://youtube.com/@letsparentonpurpose Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/letsparentonpurpose Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/letsparentonpurpose Twitter: https://www.twitter.com/jaydholland  

Join Amy and therapist and author of “Try Softer” and “Strong Like Water,” Aundi Kolber, as they delve into the concept of "try softer," the idea of giving compassion to navigate the challenges of parenting children with complex medical or emotional issues. They recognize the validity of responding from a place of danger or crisis while also exploring the transformative power of paying compassionate attention to our own experiences. By turning towards reality with compassion, we can process and move on from threats, accurately assess our own needs, and create practices for healing. Discover the importance of acknowledging pain, finding support, and ultimately experiencing goodness and healing simultaneously in this illuminating episode. Ep,137; July 18, 2023Key Moments:[2:48] Honor the reality, respond with compassion. [9:15] Importance of grounding and connecting with your support people[21:15] Moving beyond your crisis/situational strength[33:29] How to help siblings work through situations without trauma themselvesResources:Try SofterStrong Like Water Aundi's Website IG: @aundikolber If you enjoyed the show:Have you purchased our new book, The Other Side of Special? Subscribe to our newsletter on the Take Heart WebsiteGet our free resource on finding Gratitude, Peace, and HopeReview and like us on Apple Podcasts Share us with others from wherever you listen to podcastsFollow us on Instagram @takeheartspecialmomsFind Amy at www.amyjbrown.com/  or on Instagram @amyjbrown_writerFind Carrie at www.carriemholt.com or on Instagram @carriemholtFind Sara at www.saraclime.com or on Instagram @saraclimeSupport the show

Do you feel like you have to stay strong to survive? Aundi Kolber, a licensed professional counselor and author, talks with Amy Julia Becker about her latest book, Strong Like Water. They discuss how to:become strong in new waysreceive and participate in healinglive with compassion towards ourselves and carry love in our bodies__Guest Bio“Aundi Kolber is a licensed professional counselor (MA, LPC) and author of the critically acclaimed Try Softer. She has received additional training in her specialization of trauma- and body-centered therapies and is passionate about the integration of faith and psychology. Aundi regularly speaks at local and national events, and she has appeared on podcasts such as The Lazy Genius with Kendra Adachi, Typology, Go and Tell Gals, and The Next Right Thing with Emily P. Freeman. As a survivor of trauma, Aundi brings hard-won knowledge about the work of change, the power of redemption, and the beauty of experiencing God with us in our pain.”__Connect Online:Aundi's websiteAundi on InstagramAundi on Twitter__On the Podcast:Small Talk AudiobookBook: Strong like Water: Finding the Freedom, Safety, and Compassion to Move through Hard Things--and Experience True Flourishing Dr. Gabor Maté__Transcript:For transcript and more, go to: amyjuliabecker.com/aundi-kolber/__Season 6 of the Love Is Stronger Than Fear podcast connects to themes in my latest book, To Be Made Well, which you can order here! Learn more about my writing and speaking at amyjuliabecker.com.*A transcript of this episode will be available within one business day on my website, and a video with closed captions will be available on my YouTube Channel.Connect with me: Instagram Facebook Twitter Website Thanks for listening!

Aundi Kolber is a licensed professional counselor (LPC), speaker, and author of the groundbreaking book Try Softer and its companion, The Try Softer Guided Journey. Aundi is the owner of Kolber Counseling, LLC, established in 2009. In addition to her MA in community counseling, she has received additional training in her specialization of trauma- and body-centered therapies, including the highly researched and regarded eye movement desensitization and reprocessing (EMDR) therapy.As a survivor of trauma and a lifelong learner, Aundi brings hard-won knowledge around the work of change, the power of redemption, and the beauty of experiencing God with us in our pain.In This EpisodeAundi's websiteStrong like Water. Finding the Freedom, Safety, and Compassion to Move through Hard Things—and Experience True Flourishing.---What's new with The Trauma Therapist Project!The Trauma 5: gold nuggets from my 700+ interviewsThe Trauma Therapist Newsletter: a monthly resource of information and inspiration dedicated to trauma therapists.This show is part of the Spreaker Prime Network, if you are interested in advertising on this podcast, contact us at https://www.spreaker.com/show/5739761/advertisement

Boundaries are all kinds of magic. Let's talk about the nervous system and how boundaries can help the nervous system get regulated and reduce stress. Links and Resources Mentioned in This Episode: MHS Article APA on Trauma Instagram post on boundaries and trauma Boundaries Coaching Aundi Kolber's Try Softer and Strong Like Water --- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/beknown/support

Aundi Kolber is a trusted friend here at Revelation Wellness who speaks such truth for us as we walk through the healing process in our bodies. This episode is for those who want to grow or want deeper freedom but still carry pain that hasn't been resolved. Aundi not only shares her own traumatic journey, but she speaks real hope for our bodies to be able to move through the pain and into deeper healing. This episode is like hanging out with two of the wisest women who carry the biggest banners for freedom! You're going to want to get under this piñata! Aundi is a licensed therapist and author of the beautiful new book, Strong Like Water, and one of our favorites, Try Softer (you can listen to that episode here,  #421). You can connect with Aundi at aundikolber.com. We are so EXCITED that The Body Revelation launch season is here! That's right! Alisa's new book, The Body Revelation, is available for pre-order now! Each pre-order gives you exclusive content and offers, such as the audiobook narrated by Alisa, discounts on The Body Revelation clothing line, and so much more! Click here to pre-order and learn more!  Have you downloaded the RW App yet? Before you hit play, go to the app store and download the free RW App. You can also check out our exclusive REVING the Word episodes for RW+ subscribers! Try RW+ out free for seven days and press play on our brand new workout, RevXing the Word.  We love our Rev community and think you will too! Be sure to get connected with us at: The Official Revelation Wellness Facebook / Instagram / RevWell TV / Youtube   Your reviews matter to us and help spread the good news, so please leave us one where you listen to your podcast! If we read your review on our show, we'll send you a gift from the Revelation Wellness Store!   We'd also love to hear from you! So leave us a VOICE MESSAGE here!  Tell us what you thought about this episode and how God met you in this episode.  

In this episode, host Kelly Wolfe is joined by author and Licensed Professional Counselor, Aundi Kolber, to discuss themes from Aundi's new book, Strong Like Water: Finding the Freedom, Safety, & Compassion to Move Through Hard Things — & Experience True Flourishing -- themes like:what it means for us to redefine strength, and how it serves us to do sothe importance of felt safetyhow to begin building (or rebuilding) trust with our own good selves, andhow to recognize integration in ourselves when it starts to happen.Links for this Episode: Episode 2: Believing in Our Belovedness with Aundi Kolber AundiKolber.com Aundi Kolber on Twitter Aundi Kolber on Instagram Guest Bio: Aundi Kolber is a licensed professional counselor (MA, LPC) and author of the critically acclaimed Try Softer. She has received additional training in her specialization of trauma- and body-centered therapies and is passionate about the integration of faith and psychology. As a survivor of trauma, Aundi brings hard-won knowledge about the work of change, the power of redemption, and the beauty of experiencing God with us in our pain.

Whether you're hypervigilant or you tend to become withdrawn in the aftermath of trauma, there are certain costs to being strong - we were made well and we can live in survival mode for a long time. However, walking to freedom and safety on the other side is not only the goal, but it's accessible and present. Today we are grateful to have acclaimed trauma specialist and author Aundi Kolber, LMHC of Try Softer sharing her brand new book, Strong Like Water as we learn the way to more fluidly and safely process trauma. She offers us tips for individuals and couples as we learn the way to resiliency and ultimately to becoming strong like water together. Show Links: Get Aundi's brand new book Strong Like Water here!  Visit Aundi's website here! Meet Aundi on her Instagram here! Sign up for the Gospel for Enneagram Conference Free Registration  here! Sign up for the All-Access Pass to the conference with speaker bonuses and recordings here! Head on over to enneagramandmarriage.com to check out all of our Enneagram & Marriage freebies and resources! Instagram: @enneagramandmarriage | @enneagrammarriagepod Facebook @enneagramandmarriage   Love what you're learning on E + M? We would be honored if you'd leave a review so others can find us too right here at Apple or on Spotify here!

“Healing requires fierceness and tenderness.” - Aundi KolberMany of us don't realize that just as God is profoundly kind and compassionate to us; we are invited to steward that compassion toward ourselves in the form of self-compassion. How do we do this? We begin to practice gentleness and attentiveness toward our wounds in the same way that God is already kind to us.On this edition, we're featuring a discussion Michael had with our good friend Aundi Kolber, congratulating her on the recent publishing of Strong Like Water on March 21st. Today, Michael and Aundi will devote their time together discussing what it means to discover self-compassion. If you're not familiar with Aundi, she is a Licensed Professional Counselor, writer, and speaker from Castle Rock, Colorado, who specializes in trauma- and body-centered therapies. As a trauma survivor, Aundi brings what she has learned about the work of change, the power of redemption, and the beauty of experiencing God in our pain. Connect with Aundi at aundikolber.com, on Facebook, and Instagram.Helpful Resources:Bonus content from AundiPrevious episodes with Aundi:Episode 110 - Aundi Kolber, "Try Softer, Part 1"Episode 111 - Aundi Kolber, "Try Softer, Part 2"Episode 70 - Aundi Kolber Part 1, “Healing Trauma: Getting Unstuck and Becoming Whole”Episode 71 - Aundi Kolber Part 2, “Healing Trauma: Getting Unstuck and Becoming Whole”Episode 199 - Aundi Kolber, "Understanding Attunement"Episode 251 - Aundi Kolber, "Strong Like Water"Discover how the barrier built by porn addiction can become a bridge to abundant life.What if lust for porn is really a search for true passion?In a world where there are 68 million searches for pornography every day and where over 70 percent of Christian men report viewing porn in the last year, it's no surprise that more and more men struggle with an addiction to this false fantasy. Common wisdom says if they just had more willpower or more faith, their fight would be over. Contact Restoring the Soul:- Tweet us at @michaeljcusick and @PodcastRTS- Like us on Facebook- Email us at info@restoringthesoul.comThanks for listening!

Angelina Lee of Exploring Plan Be talks about being softer with yourself and your children Episode 1693: Try Softer by Angelina Lee Angelina Lee hails from a small island in the Caribbean. She is a wife, mother of three and an Attorney-at-Law by profession. Join her as she seeks to delve deeper into the art of being. Fully, unapologetically and honestly being. The original post is located here: https://exploringplanbe.com/try-softer/ Visit Me Online at OLDPodcast.com Interested in advertising on the show? Visit https://www.advertisecast.com/OptimalRelationshipsDailyMarriageParenting Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Trauma therapist Aundi Kolber is a guest on Spark My Muse with host Lisa Colon DeLay. With her book Strong Like Water, Kolber builds on her critically-acclaimed and much-beloved first book called Try Softer.

Hey friend! Does it ever feel like you're living in survival mode? You know that feeling where you find yourself constantly saying, “if I can just get through one more day, things will be better”? I know I have! But what does it really take to move out of survival mode? How do we find a place a safety and compassion for ourselves (and others) as we process and move past what we've been through? Trauma-informed therapist Aundi Kolber joins me on the show today to tackle those questions and more!  Aundi is a licensed professional counselor, and while we can't all be her clients, we can all access the wisdom she shares in her two books, Try Softer and Strong Like Water.  This is a rich conversation about emotional health, and I'm so excited to share it with you.  Join in as we talk about:  How the last three years have affected all of us (and why it makes sense if you're not “over it”) Steps we can take to build safety in ourselves, with each other, and in our spaces like churches and schools The surprising way compassion impacts our nervous system The different styles of attachment, and why “good enough” parenting really is good enough  Aundi Kolber is a licensed professional counselor and author of two books, including her most recent, Strong Like Water: Finding the Freedom, Safety, and Compassion to Move through Hard Things–and Experience True Flourishing. Aundi lives with her family in Castle Rock, CO.  Favorite quotes: ~“Trauma is anything that overwhelms our nervous system's capacity to cope.” ~“How we experience is something at least as important as the event itself.” ~“Getting yourself outside is a great place to do grounding. Nature is so soothing to us and really regulating to our nervous system.” ~“We are designed for more. Both our fierceness and softness are God-given.” ~“Our relationship with ourselves is influenced by our attachment style.” ~“Secure relationships have an internal sense of predictability that when you have needs others around who care for you will do their best to meet their needs to the extent they are able.” ~“One way to begin is to become aware of our attachment style.” Coaching this week:  1. Bundling Friend Time: Getting enough friend time, especially during busy seasons. (38:15) Links to great things we discussed:  Aundi Kolber Website  Strong Like Water: Finding the Freedom, Safety, and Compassion to Move through Hard Things–and Experience True Flourishing Aundi Kolber Instagram Aundi Kolber Twitter Slow - JOHNNYSWIM Ted Lasso How to Keep House While Drowning - KC Davis Creed 3 Benefit Fluff Up Brow Wax Order your copy of Remaining You While Raising Them here. Hope you loved this episode! Be sure to subscribe in iTunes and slap some stars on a review! :) xo, Alli

“Compassion and gentleness create something in us that is very solid and strong.” - Aundi KolberHow do you define strength? And does the phrase, “what doesn't kill you make you stronger,” really true? On today's edition of Restoring the Soul, Michael welcomes back Aundi Kolber to the podcast, and they're going to unpack the essence of true strength and discover that God has, and always will be with us on our journey of becoming more beautifully human in the midst of adversity.Aundi's latest book, “Strong Like Water” releases on March 21st. The following links will offer you an opportunity to pre-order the book. Aundi has also made available some bonus content via her website, and we've provided that link below.Aundi is a frequent guest of Restoring the Soul; in fact, her “Try Softer” interview with Michael was the most downloaded podcast of ours to date. She is a licensed professional counselor from Castle Rock, CO; her work has been featured on Relevant, CT Women,  The Huffington Post, The Mudroom, Happy Sonship, and Circling the Story. We're always thrilled when Aundi can join us for the discussion - you're in for a real treat today.Helpful Resources:Bonus content from AundiPre-order Strong Like WaterBaker BooksTyndaleAmazonBarnes & NoblePrevious episodes with AundiEpisode 110 - Aundi Kolber, "Try Softer, Part 1"Episode 111 - Aundi Kolber, "Try Softer, Part 2"Episode 70 - Aundi Kolber Part 1, “Healing Trauma: Getting Unstuck and Becoming Whole”Episode 71 - Aundi Kolber Part 2, “Healing Trauma: Getting Unstuck and Becoming Whole”Episode 199 - Aundi Kolber, "Understanding Attunement"Episode 200 - Aundi Kolber, "Discovering Self Compassion"Contact Restoring the Soul:- Tweet us at @michaeljcusick and @PodcastRTS- Like us on Facebook- Email us at info@restoringthesoul.comThanks for listening!

Aundi Kolber is a licensed professional counselor and author of the critically acclaimed Try Softer. She specializes in trauma- and body-centered therapies and is passionate about the integration of faith and psychology. In this episode Stephen talks with Aundi about her latest book Strong Like Water and how we can move through pain into the expansiveness of our deeper yearnings for transcendence, beauty, and wonder. Music for this episode is provided by Nashville singer/songwriter Lynn Marie. Patrons of the podcast can listen to a special Meet The Artist interview with Lynn on our Patreon. Episode Sponsor: Hope Words Writer's ConferenceUse this link with the code “MANDMHW10” to receive a special Makers and Mystics listener discount.

Life comes at you fast and often times, we can feel like we're just keeping up. Today Rick and Lauren invite you to reframe what it means to simply "react" to everything and consider what it might look like to be creative instead. Rick references a story from the book Walk the Walk by Alana Deutschman.Rick references R.D. McClenagan's sermon about Peter: Facing Your Past Rick references Scaling Leadership by Robert J. Anderson and William A. Adams. Rick references our episode Try Softer.Email Rick at rickdunn61@gmail.com or find him on Facebook, Twitter, or Instagram. Email Lauren at laurengmorgan@gmail.com or find her on Instagram.

It's a new year! Which means resolutions, goals, a FRESH start. But we've done this song and dance before haven't we? Today Rick and Lauren discuss what we might really be looking for as we move into the new year. Rick references our episode called Try Softer. Email Rick at rickdunn61@gmail.com or find him on Facebook, Twitter, or Instagram. Email Lauren at laurengmorgan@gmail.com or find her on Instagram.

The body keeps the score.   God designed your body with great intention and care. We need body awareness, knowing that God created us mind, spirit and body.   Yet, accumulated stress and a lack of ability to name what is happening can cause the body to shut down. In this episode, hear my personal journey with anxiety, how my body started crying out, and how I came to discern anxiety and learn tools to find true breakthroughs. Tune in as I share resources that have been tremendous in providing awareness and healing in my own life (and in my home).    Let's learn to honor the story of the body.   Mentioned in this episode: Try Softer, Aundi Kolber Anchored: How to Befriend Your Nervous System Using Polyvagal Theory, Deb Dana Centering Prayer App Revelation Wellness   Related Episode: Sex as a Stress Reliever, Episode 89 Making Space for Margin and Rest, Episode 101   You're Invited: Keep learning with Francie! Join the Discipleship Circle group mentorship. This is a SWEET community of women, connected with the purpose of seeking God's heart for their reclaiming a redeemed view of sex and sexuality. Inside the circle, we will explore and discover the good news about God's heart for sex. Learn more here: Discipleship Circle   Francie is partnered with MyCounselor.Online as a resource for Biblically based counseling, including sex therapy. You'll receive a 25% discount on your first session. Click  here Connect with Francie: Receive Francie's weekly newsletter  Website Instagram