Podcasts about sex addiction

#ChrisDistefano #StandUp #Comedy Jim Norton joins Chris Distefano on the Chaos Bus for an insanely honest conversation about marriage, sex addiction, getting older and surviving the highs and lows of a career in comedy. Jim looks back on the days when he planned gigs around escorts, explains why the “good old days” weren't actually that good, and talks about how marriage changed his life. Chris opens up about his own career fears after selling out Radio City, while Jim shares what nearly four decades in comedy have taught him about success, failure and staying in the game. Plus, the guys talk jiu-jitsu, Jonah Hill, Dave Attell, the changing comedy world, Matt Dillon and plenty more. 00:00 Jim Norton Used to Plan Tours Around Escorts 01:17 Jim Norton Joins the Chaos Bus 05:35 Getting Married After a Lifetime of Freedom 08:21 Sex Addiction, Escorts & Being Single at 60 09:46 Chris' Wild Atlantic City Story 12:05 Would Jim Norton Have Been a Good Dad? 13:43 Chris & Jim Talk Fighting and Jiu-Jitsu 16:18 Jonah Hill's Jiu-Jitsu Confidence 20:04 Chaos on the Streets 21:04 Can Jim Norton Actually Defend Himself? 25:05 The Highs and Lows of a Comedy Career 28:03 Chris Gets Honest About His Career 30:40 You Don't Live on the Mountaintop 32:01 Why Chris Is Never Satisfied 34:24 Has Comedy Changed for a New Generation? 37:12 Jim Carrey, Adam Sandler & Comedy That Lasts 38:18 Discovering Woody Allen's Comedy 40:00 Chris Finds Out a Girl Was Sleeping With Matt Dillon 42:08 Chris Regrets Selling His House 48:56 Jim Looks Back on the Opie & Anthony Years 50:25 Is Jim Norton Happier at 58? 51:36 Jim Planned Comedy Tours Around Escorts 52:47 What Jim Norton's Marriage Is Actually Like 59:22 Money, Comedy & Surviving the Business 01:01:01 What Would Drunk Jim Norton Be Like Today? 01:02:49 Did Jim Get Everything He Wanted From Comedy? UNCUT WILD CONTENT GO HERE

In episode 345, a couple is facing the enormous aftermath of pornography addiction, sexual betrayal, deception, failed disclosure, and trickle truth. The husband reports that he is now 18 months sober, has become rigorously honest and transparent, participates in therapy and 12-step recovery, and is working to sit with his wife's pain without defensiveness. Yet his wife's trauma remains intense. She has maintained a boundary of no physical contact for approximately 18 months, frequently expresses disgust and anger toward him, and periodically insists that she wants a divorce while demanding that he be the one to file. The critical reality is that his recovery does not erase the impact of his past choices. Sobriety, honesty, and improved behavior matter tremendously, but they cannot dictate the pace of her healing or guarantee that she will ultimately want reconciliation.At the same time, understanding the source of a betrayed partner's anger does not mean that every form of communication should continue indefinitely. If the marriage is going to have a genuine chance, patterns of contempt, humiliation, name-calling, aggression, defensiveness, and retaliation must progressively give way to healthier communication and individual accountability. The husband must continue owning the tremendous harm he caused while recognizing that his job is to create the best possible environment for his wife's healing—not to control or perform that healing for her. Likewise, although she did not cause the betrayal or deserve its consequences, she is ultimately the only person who can pursue her own healing, recover her voice and agency, and determine what she authentically wants. Both partners need to move away from “I did this because you did that” and toward taking responsibility for how each chooses to show up now.The deeper question is therefore not simply whether he should file for divorce because she tells him to. He can authentically say that he does not want a divorce, respects her right to choose one, and still wants to give the marriage an opportunity to heal. But neither partner should remain indefinitely trapped in a painful holding pattern. With professional support, they need to identify what reconciliation would actually require, what each person's deepest wants and needs are, whether those needs are compatible, and whether both genuinely want to undertake the work necessary to build a fundamentally different relationship. If both choose reconciliation, the long-term goal must be a return to true partnership rather than a permanent dynamic of offender and victim, guilty spouse and judge. If one or both ultimately determine that reconciliation is no longer possible, healing must continue individually so that both can move toward lives of greater honesty, wholeness, safety, and peace.For a full transcript of this podcast in article format, go to:   My Addiction Shattered My Wife; She Wants a Divorce, but I Don't. Now What?!Learn more about Mark and Steve's revolutionary online porn/sexual addiction recovery and betrayal trauma healing program at—daretoconnectnow.comFind out more about Steve Moore at:  Ascension CounselingLearn more about Mark Kastleman at:  Reclaim Counseling Services

Statistically, if you're a Christian man, you've struggled with pornography — and statistically, you've never told a single person. Today I want to talk about why that silence, not the struggle itself, is what's actually destroying you.We've been told the answer is more willpower. Try harder. Pray harder. Feel guilty next time. But if that worked, you wouldn't still be stuck. A Barna study found nearly 7 out of 10 men sitting in church pews every Sunday are struggling with pornography — and many pastors are too. You are not alone, and willpower alone fails against secrecy every time.In this video I break down:✅ Why secrecy — not weakness — is why you keep losing this fight✅ What 1 John 1:7 actually means for men stuck in this cycle✅ The one move that changes the trajectory (it's not another promise to yourself)✅ Why Romans 8:1 says there's no condemnation for you TODAY, not "once you're fixed"I work at a company that exists to help men win this fight, and I've sat with more of these stories than almost anyone you know. Here's the pattern: the men who get free aren't the ones who feel the worst about it — they're the ones who stop hiding it the moment one person really knows.This is part of an ongoing series on porn addiction, shame, and freedom for Christian men. Subscribe so you don't miss what's next.⏱ TIMESTAMPS00:00 The lie nobody says out loud in church00:33 Why willpower alone always loses to secrecy01:41 What 1 John 1:7 actually teaches about fellowship02:34 The pattern I keep seeing in men who get free03:11 The one text that changes everything03:35 You are not your addiction (Romans 8:1)04:31 The assignment for today04:57 What's coming next in this series

The partner in this situation (Episode 343) recognizes that her husband's honesty about two recent relapses represents meaningful progress after years of pornography use, self-gratification, betrayal, and deception. However, the aftermath of those relapses remains deeply damaging. He spirals into shame, discouragement, and self-condemnation, creating a heavy emotional atmosphere in the home and leaving her feeling responsible for stabilizing him while she is also trying to process her own grief and betrayal trauma. His requests that she pursue him, cuddle him, initiate affection, or make him feel wanted become especially painful when he later rejects her or questions whether her efforts are genuine.Although unresolved grief, childhood wounds, and protective parts may help explain why addiction and shame become activated, they do not excuse the behavior or make his partner responsible for healing him. His shame functions like a bucket full of holes: no amount of external reassurance can fill what he has not learned to repair internally. When he seeks sexual or emotional validation from the person he has just harmed, he risks using her as a confessor, rescuer, and sexual absolver. Real accountability goes far beyond admitting the relapse. It requires him to tolerate difficult emotions, contact his sponsor, therapist, group, or recovery support, examine what led to the relapse, identify the deeper needs he was attempting to meet, and develop a specific plan for changing his recovery practices.For the betrayed partner, healthy boundaries include taking physical or emotional space, declining to become his primary emotional regulator, and participating in affection or sexual intimacy only when it feels authentic and safe for her. She can acknowledge his honesty without taking responsibility for his shame, and she can refuse to remain in a cycle where she is asked to pursue him only to be rejected or interrogated. He does not need to be perfect, but he does need to stand up, lead his recovery, respect her healing process, and protect her from additional harm. Genuine connection becomes possible when he owns his recovery and she remains loyal to her safety, truth, boundaries, and healing.For a full transcript of this podcast in article format, go to:   He's Honest About Relapses, But His Spiraling Shame and Neediness Cycle is Exhausting!Learn more about Mark and Steve's revolutionary online porn/sexual addiction recovery and betrayal trauma healing program at—daretoconnectnow.comFind out more about Steve Moore at:  Ascension CounselingLearn more about Mark Kastleman at:  Reclaim Counseling Services

Sexual addiction is often treated as a behavior problem. Stop the behavior. Remove the temptation. Try harder next time. But what if the behavior is not the real issue? What if the patterns that bring shame, secrecy, and self-sabotage are actually revealing something deeper about the story you carry? This week on Win Today, therapist and researcher Jay Stringer joins me to unpack the anatomy of sexual addiction and unwanted sexual behavior. Drawing from research involving more than 3,800 men and women, Jay explains why these patterns are rarely random and how the unresolved parts of our past often shape them. We talk about why shame keeps people trapped in destructive cycles, why curiosity is often the first step toward healing, and why grief has the surprising power to reshape what we desire. Sexual struggles are not simply moral failures to suppress. They can become a roadmap that leads us toward the healing we have avoided. If you are stuck in patterns you cannot explain, if shame has kept you silent, or if you've tried to manage the behavior without understanding the story behind it, this episode will help you see why real freedom begins with honesty. Guest Bio Jay Stringer is a licensed therapist, minister, and researcher who helps men and women understand and outgrow unwanted sexual behaviors. He is the author of the award-winning book Unwanted: How Sexual Brokenness Reveals Our Way to Healing, based on a multiyear research study involving more than 3,800 men and women exploring the roots of sexual addiction and compulsive sexual behavior. Jay is also the creator of the Sexual Behavior Self-Assessment and The Journey Course, a five-month program designed to help individuals identify and transform the deeper drivers behind destructive patterns. He holds an MDiv and a master's degree in counseling psychology from The Seattle School of Theology and Psychology and completed post-graduate training under Dr. Dan Allender while serving as a Senior Fellow at The Allender Center. Show Partner SafeSleeve designs a phone case that blocks up to 99% of harmful EMF radiation—so I'm not carrying that kind of exposure next to my body all day. It's sleek, durable, and most importantly, lab-tested by third parties. The results aren't hidden—they're published right on their site. And that matters because many so-called EMF blockers on the market either don't work or can't prove they do. We protect our hearts and minds—why wouldn't we protect our bodies too? Head to safesleevecases.com and use the code WINTODAY10 for 10% off your order. Episode Links Show Notes Buy my book "Healing What You Can't Erase" here! Invite me to speak at your church or event. Connect with me @WINTODAYChris on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, and YouTube.

Send us Fan MailOn-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centreSex Addiction prevalence in the couple's relationship is likely to create tension, conflict , hurt and damage to trust and therefore undermine to couple's relationship. Repair will be needed and almost certainly third party trained help will be beneficial.When "Mrs Porn" is on her way out and a distance down the road - not necessarily having been gone for a long period - but going is detectible - it's time to work on repairing the couple. Up until then, the couple have different work to do and different journeys, before joint work.What is a Repair Attempt? Consider this - from The Gottman Institute: "A repair attempt is any statement or action — verbal, physical, or otherwise — meant to diffuse negativity and keep a conflict from escalating out of control. In his book The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work, John Gottman, Ph.D., calls repair attempts a secret weapon of emotionally intelligent couples. His ground breaking research shows “the success or failure of a couple's repair attempts is one of the primary factors in whether [a] marriage is likely to flourish or flounder.”What do we do when our repair attempts fall flat? The simple act of making repair attempts is not enough. Knowing your partner, by understanding their "Needs"/Love Language/Apology Language/The Five Loves (in my book The Art Of Loving) - will help to devise ways to effectively de-escalate a conflict/argument -often arising from the betrayal. Each has lost their best friend.Conflict is inevitable and is not necessarily bad. It is very hard to remain in conflict with someone you are touching and embracing. The block is letting go of pride and actually making the first move to touch the other person. You should try it!All our deepest fears stem from our desire for connection (to be secure) and significance. Our deepest fears are therefore to lose connection and lack significance.There are 7 A's of an effective confession - as a first step towards Repair & Rebuilding connection. They are:1.    Address everyone involved: admit to your role which contributed to the conflict - to every person who has been directly affected.2.    Avoid “if”, “but” and “maybe”: do not use words that shift the blame to others or appear to minimise or excuse your guilt.3.    Admit specifically: identify the specific behaviour which you need to change.4.    Acknowledge the hurt: show that you are trying to understand the way someone must havefelt by your behaviour.5.    Accept the consequence: the consequence may have been severe and restitution may benecessary.6.    Alter your behaviour: explain to the person you offended how you plan to alter your behaviour in the future. 7.    Ask for forgiveness (and allow the other person time). (Forgiveness is one of the most valuable gifts possible. It is very important to understand true Forgiveness, before giving it. A part of Forgiveness is a promise never to again raise the issue against the person! (That can be very tough to uphold).Sex Addict - this applies to you: "If you board the wrong train, it is no use running along the corridor in the other direction" — DietrichBonhoefferGet some help from The Kairos Centre. See what you cannot see. Begin to change that which you begin to better understand.Bringing colour back to life - without Shame.Key words: sex addiction, addicted, partner, porn addiction, recovery, sex drive, therapy, sex therapy, podcast, relationships, relationship counseling, relationship advice, addiction, couples, couples therapy, sex therapy, emdr, love addiction, behavior,Support the show

What does the crew do after the show? Bride's best friend died at her bachelorette party in St. Barts. Would you move your wedding date if your best friend died? Claude Lemieux's son claims his dad relapsed into sex addiction prior to his death. Rover is shocked by the new salespeople. Old man slaps young guy in the back of the head after he didn't stand for the National Anthem. Cease and desist letter prank on Duji. An 8-year-old girl is distraught after no one showed up to her birthday party. Drivers are still using a bridge in Greece that was damaged due to storms rather than using a detour. MLB Athletics player is put on the injured list after he is hit in the genitals with a baseball. Leopard in a liquor store.

What does the crew do after the show? Bride's best friend died at her bachelorette party in St. Barts. Would you move your wedding date if your best friend died? Claude Lemieux's son claims his dad relapsed into sex addiction prior to his death. Rover is shocked by the new salespeople. Old man slaps young guy in the back of the head after he didn't stand for the National Anthem. Cease and desist letter prank on Duji. An 8-year-old girl is distraught after no one showed up to her birthday party. Drivers are still using a bridge in Greece that was damaged due to storms rather than using a detour. MLB Athletics player is put on the injured list after he is hit in the genitals with a baseball. Leopard in a liquor store.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Send us Fan MailOn-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centreNegative thinking is also a form of meditation - meditation on the wrong thing.CBT (Cognitive Behavioural) principles kick in - which tells us - my thinking (whether negative or positive) will always determine and lead to my behaviour. Therefore, a negative schema is being set up, such that negative behaviours are merely following the pre-determine trajectory set in place by cognitive/thinking.Change comes from the principle: "If you can change your mind, you can change your life" ie If you can change your thinking, you can change the trajectory of your life.When you think about a ship's trajectory, visualise the fact of a one degree shift in the rudder and where that ship will be in just one hour. Change is all about small degrees of shifts; no big leaps. Quickly gone = quickly return - when it comes to Sex/Porn/Love Addiction Recovery.At the Kairos Centre, we do not speak about someone gaining sobriety until 1 year from the last acting out. It takes time to rewire the brain and install new neural pathways, coming out of new thinking.May it be said of you: "I am now in control of my life. It was not always so". "How you think when you lose determines how long it will be until you win." — G.K. ChestertonGet some help from The Kairos Centre. See what you cannot see. Begin to change that which you begin to better understand.Bringing colour back to life - without Shame.Key words: sex addiction, addicted, partner, porn addiction, recovery, sex drive, therapy, sex therapy, podcast, relationships, relationship counseling, relationship advice, addiction, couples, couples therapy, sex therapy, emdr, love addiction, behavior,Support the show

Have you been cheated on, experienced broken trust? Or are you struggling with sex addiction? Join our (Brannon + Tyler

Send us Fan MailOn-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centreYou really are not as bad as yo think you are. Honestly!Your sense of who you really are has gone adrift. Try the exercise in today's video, to reclaim right perspectives over time. Self compassion is needed - toward self. Don't be that hard on yourself. Too much self chastisement and insufficient praise and acknowledgement of an achievement, has enhanced that self deprecation. Stop it now!Do the exercise for at least 30 days. Get to know you. Get to like you. Get to like you. The glass is half full and not always half empty - in your thinking.Become more self compassionate and therefore, more self caring. You are worth it. You deserve it.You really cannot love your close other, at the level that you think you do, if you don't love yourself first! Challenge me on that one!We need to get you to a place of "Mirror, mirror on the wall, who is the fairest of them all. Well it's me of course". (And you say it with a smile). Ok - I will let go of forcing you to say it with a smile - to start with, but it needs to come.Begin the exercise described and be faithful in practising it for at least 30 days - consistently.Take small incremental steps. The Kairos Centre does not work with quick fixes; otherwise quickly in, quickly undone and out. Rather - let's see 'here a little; there a little; a little bit here and a little bit there". Remember the Pothole poem:A poem by Portia Nelson: There's a Hole in My Sidewalk: The Romance of Self- Discovery Verse I: I walk down the street. There is a deep hole in the sidewalk I fall in. I am lost ... I am helpless. It isn't my fault. It takes forever to find a way out.  Verse II: I walk down the same street. There is a deep hole in the sidewalk. I pretend I don't see it. I fall in again. I can't believe I am in the same place. But, it isn't my fault. It still takes a long time to get out.  Verse III: I walk down the same street. There is a deep hole in the sidewalk. I see it is there. I still fall in ... it's a habit ... but, my eyes are open. I know where I am. It is my fault. I get out immediately.  Verse IV: I walk down the same street. There is a deep hole in the sidewalk. I walk around it. Verse V: I walk down another street.Get some help from The Kairos Centre. See what you cannot see. Begin to change that which you begin to better understand.Bringing colour back to life - without Shame.Key words: sex addiction, addicted, partner, porn addiction, recovery, sex drive, therapy, sex therapy, podcast, relationships, relationship counseling, relationship advice, addiction, couples, couples therapy, sex therapy, emdr, love addiction, behavior,Support the show

Send us Fan MailOn-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centreConsider these Life Stages by Dr Thomas Armstrong, Ph.D (www.institute4learning.com):"Here are what I call the twelve gifts of the human life cycle:1.         Prebirth:  Potential – The child who has not yet been born could become anything – a Michelangelo, a Shakespeare, a Martin Luther King – and thus holds for all of humanity the principle of what we all may yet become in our lives.2.         Birth:  Hope – When a child is born, it instills in its parents and other caregivers a sense of optimism; a sense that this new life may bring something new and special into the world.  Hence, the newborn represents the sense of hope that we all nourish inside of ourselves to make the world a better place.3.         Infancy (Ages 0-3):   Vitality – The infant is a vibrant and seemingly unlimited source of energy.  Babies thus represent the inner dynamo of humanity, ever fueling the fires of the human life cycle with new channels of psychic power.4.         Early Childhood (Ages 3-6):  Playfulness – When young children play, they recreate the world anew.  They take what is and combine it with the what is possible to fashion events that have never been seen before in the history of the world.  As such, they embody the principle of innovation and transformation that underlies every single creative act that has occurred in the course of civilization.5.         Middle Childhood (Ages 6-8):  Imagination – In middle childhoood, the sense of an inner subjective self develops for the first time, and this self is alive with images taken in from the outer world, and brought up from the depths of the unconscious.  This imagination serves as a source of creative inspiration in later life for artists, writers, scientists, and anyone else who finds their days and nights enriched for having nurtured a deep inner life.6.         Late Childhood (Ages 9-11):  Ingenuity – Older children have acquired a wide range of social and technical skills that enable them to come up with marvelous strategies and inventive solutions for dealing with the increasing pressures that society places on them.  This principle of ingenuity lives on in that part of ourselves that ever seeks new ways to solve practical problems and cope with everyday responsibilities.7.         Adolescence (Ages 12-20):  Passion –  The biological event of puberty unleashes a powerful set of changes in the adolescent body that reflect themselves in a teenager's sexual, emotional, cultural, and/or spiritual passion.  Adolescence passion thus represents a significant touchstone for anyone who is seeking to reconnect with their deepest inner zeal for life.8.         Early Adulthood (Ages 20-35):  Enterprise –  It takes enterprise for young adults to accomplish their many responsibilities, including finding a home and mate, establishing a family or circle of friends, and/or getting a good job.  This principle of enterprise thus serves us at any stage of life when we need to go out into the world and make our mark.9.         Midlife (Ages 35-50):  Contemplation – After many years in young adulthood of following society's scripts for creating a life, people in midlife often take a break from worldly responsibilities to reflect upon the deeper meaning of their lives, the better to forge ahead with new understanding.  This element of contemplation represents an important resource that we can all draw upon to deepen and enrich our lives at any age.10.   Mature Adulthood (Ages 50-80): Benevolence – Those in mature adulthood have raised families, established themselves in their work life, and become contributors to the betterment of society through volunteerism, mentorships, and other forms of philanthropy.  All of humanity benefits from their benevolence.  Moreover, we all can learn from their example to give more of ourselves to others.11.   Late Adulthood (Age 80+):  Wisdom – Those with long lives have acquired a rich repository of experiences that they can use to help guide others.  Elders thus represent the source of wisdom that exists in each of us, helping us to avoid the mistakes of the past while reaping the benefits of life's lessons.12.   Death & Dying:  Life – Those in our lives who are dying, or who have died, teach us about the value of living.  They remind us not to take our lives for granted, but to live each moment of life to its fullest, and to remember that our own small lives form of a part of a greater whole".Get some help from The Kairos Centre. See what you cannot see. Begin to change that which you begin to better understand.Bringing colour back to life - without Shame.Key words: sex addiction, addicted, partner, porn addiction, recovery, sex drive, therapy, sex therapy, podcast, relationships, relationship counseling, relationship advice, addiction, couples, couples therapy, sex therapy, emdr, love addiction, behavior,Support the show

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JOIN PATREON: www.patreon.com/dopeypodcast This week on The Wednesday Dose of Dopey! We talk the spiritual axiom, stress, anger, and trying to stay connected when recovery feels stale. He reads an intense email from Justin about quitting 7-OH, including brutal withdrawals, relapse cycles, and the strange misery of coming off something marketed as harmless. Then DJ Fat Tony returns to Dopey to talk about his new book, Recover Me, and the deeper recovery work he found after nearly 20 years sober. Tony opens up about trauma therapy, childhood sexual abuse, sex addiction, toxic relationships, Grindr, shame, ego, meetings becoming “The Tony Show,” and how he had to step back from meetings to actually work the program again. Dave and Tony dig into sex addiction, apps, cruising, recovery addiction, resentment, prayer, honesty, father wounds, and why real recovery has to keep evolving. They also celebrate Tony's global campaign to reclaim the word cunt, because of course they do. All that and much more on this Wednesday Episode of Dopey!   Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Send us Fan MailOn-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centreLife Stages (not Midlife Crises!) is about how Human Development is divided into distinct Stages. Here is a reminder of those Stages:Prenatal -> infancy -> early childhood -> middle childhood -> adolescence -> early adulthood -> middle adulthood -> late adulthood.It is stating the obvious, but recognise (and not only pay lip-service) to the fact that each Stage is marked by certain unique traits, patterns, behaviours, thought processes and its own individual characteristics. Therefore, each Stage has its own challenges - where it can feel like an unfair moving of the goal posts; an unfair shift which impacts the dynamics of the relationship and the (signed!) Manifesto terms of partnership role which you each had signed up to at the beginning of the relationship or had evolved over time. It is reasonable for one partner to cry 'foul' and 'unfair' - when they are experiencing the shifts; a moving of the goal post.We are all developing as Human Beings. That continues until we leave planet Earth! There will be these milestones. They will raise challenges.We will need to negotiate our way through how our unique individual self, with our culture - ever evolving - creates challenges in relationships and puts pressures upon it.Since it is an ongoing lifetime process, there are times when partners may be left scratching their heads and asking 'What just happened' or 'What's going on' and not be able to readily find answers or an explanation; made worse because the changing and evolving other partner, may also not themself understand or know why they are doing or not doing those certain actions/inaction and are left scratching their own head.The couple may need input from a Therapist.Get some help from The Kairos Centre. See what you cannot see. Begin to change that which you begin to better understand.Bringing colour back to life - without Shame.Key words: sex addiction, addicted, partner, porn addiction, recovery, sex drive, therapy, sex therapy, podcast, relationships, relationship counseling, relationship advice, addiction, couples, couples therapy, sex therapy, emdr, love addiction, behavior,Support the show

Send us Fan MailOn-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centreHuman beings have a life cycle. Each stage is marked by subtle adjustments to cope with the social, economical, cultural and sometimes, chronic stressors of the stage. Here is just one version of Life Stage age grouping categories. There are variants. Let us look at one version. Each stage looking at the different phases of life: Infant (Birth- 2 years): Changes in schedules – bedtime, routine etc., strangers and chaos can cause anxiety during this phase.Child (3-9 years): Separation anxiety can be seen as the children start going to school. Social skills and peer relationships are developed during this stage.Adolescent (10-19 years): Peer pressure, romantic relationships and independent identity are common changes during puberty. These may bring about strong emotional reactions and behavioural risks.Young adult (20-29 years): Beginning college, taking up a job, starting a family and buying a house are some of the significant events during this stage and may demand moving out of your comfort zone.Adult (30-39 years): Managing family and career growth along with increased responsibilities may lead to stress.Middle age (40-60 years): First signs of aging and effects of lifestyle, menopause in women, children leaving the house, grandchildren arriving, career peak – all these things may all take a toll on a person's mental and physical health.Independent old age (Age 60 onward): More signs of aging and lifestyle effects. Retirement, health problems and medications may cause a strain on a person in this stage.Dependent old age (Optional stage): The feeling of being dependent and requiring assistance may disturb a person and may reduce their ability to enjoy life.End of Life: This is the time when a person realizes that he/she has come close to the end and may require a lot of pep talk and love and care.Why are these stages of interest? Life Stages are NOT Mid-life crises, as some like to call them. Often said in a negative or derogatory way. Each stage has its own issues that may need help to negotiate through. But what if a partner is going through Life Stage changes in different ways and at different points in life? That is a recipe for much conflict and can feel like that partner is 'moving the goal posts' by doing behaviours outside of the norm in the relationship.Get some help from The Kairos Centre. See what you cannot see. Begin to change that which you begin to better understand.Bringing colour back to life - without Shame.Key words: sex addiction, addicted, partner, porn addiction, recovery, sex drive, therapy, sex therapy, podcast, relationships, relationship counseling, relationship advice, addiction, couples, couples therapy, sex therapy, emdr, love addiction, behavior,Support the show

Nate Larkin spent 20 years hiding a sex addiction. For 5 of those years, he was a pastor. When it was exposed and everything collapsed, it could have been the end of his story. It turned out to be the beginning. In this conversation, Nate shares what it took to rebuild and how that journey led him and a dozen guys to start the Samson Society, a community built on radical transparency, vulnerability, and confidentiality. What started as one small group has now grown to more than 600 local chapters, daily virtual meetings in 8 languages, and has helped over 25,000 men heal! You might benefit from the Samson Society or the newer women's version called the Sarah Society. We all know family members and friends who could. And Nate can teach all of us how to be real and live authentically. Check out Samson Society here: https://www.samsonsociety.com/about Join Army of Normal Folks and receive our Soul Service newsletter: https://www.normalfolks.us/#joinSupport the show: https://www.normalfolks.us/#joinSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Nate Larkin spent 20 years hiding a sex addiction. For 5 of those years, he was a pastor. When it was exposed and everything collapsed, it could have been the end of his story. It turned out to be the beginning. In this conversation, Nate shares what it took to rebuild and how that journey led him and a dozen guys to start the Samson Society, a community built on radical transparency, vulnerability, and confidentiality. What started as one small group has now grown to more than 600 local chapters, daily virtual meetings in 8 languages, and has helped over 25,000 men heal! You might benefit from the Samson Society or the newer women's version called the Sarah Society. We all know family members and friends who could. And Nate can teach all of us how to be real and live authentically. Check out Samson Society here: https://www.samsonsociety.com/about Join Army of Normal Folks and receive our Soul Service newsletter: https://www.normalfolks.us/#joinSupport the show: https://www.normalfolks.us/#joinSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

What if the substance was never really the problem? In this episode of the I Love Being Sober Podcast, recorded live at Camelback Recovery Treatment Center in Phoenix, Arizona, host Tim Westbrook sits down with Dr. Marcus Earle, Clinical Director of Psychological Counseling Services (PCS) — one of the most respected behavioral health practices in the country.Dr. Earle has spent over 35 years treating individuals, couples, and families struggling with sexual addiction, trauma, OCD, compulsive behavior, and dual diagnosis mental health issues. The PCS Intensive Program has over 40 years of experience pioneering the week-long intensive therapy model, with a multidisciplinary care team of 25+ clinicians and individualized treatment plans designed to promote lasting growth and change.In this honest, eye-opening conversation, Tim and Dr. Earle explore:What sobriety really means in sex addiction recovery — and why it's far more nuanced than abstinenceHow unresolved trauma drives addiction, compulsive behavior, and relapseThe connection between OCD, process addiction, and substance use disorderWhat dual diagnosis and mental health treatment looks like when you go beneath the surfaceWhy so many people in addiction recovery are also carrying issues they've never namedWhat long-term, thriving recovery actually looks like — not just white-knuckling itWhether you're in recovery from alcohol or drugs, struggling with a process addiction, dealing with trauma or mental health challenges, or loving someone who is — this episode will meet you where you are.Recorded live in front of clients at Camelback Recovery's Outpatient Treatment Center, this is the I Love Being Sober Podcast — real stories, real healing, real recovery.

What if the substance was never really the problem? In this episode of the I Love Being Sober Podcast, recorded live at Camelback Recovery Treatment Center in Phoenix, Arizona, host Tim Westbrook sits down with Dr. Marcus Earle, Clinical Director of Psychological Counseling Services (PCS) — one of the most respected behavioral health practices in the country. Dr. Earle has spent over 35 years treating individuals, couples, and families struggling with sexual addiction, trauma, OCD, compulsive behavior, and dual diagnosis mental health issues. The PCS Intensive Program has over 40 years of experience pioneering the week-long intensive therapy model, with a multidisciplinary care team of 25+ clinicians and individualized treatment plans designed to promote lasting growth and change. In this honest, eye-opening conversation, Tim and Dr. Earle explore: What sobriety really means in sex addiction recovery — and why it's far more nuanced than abstinence How unresolved trauma drives addiction, compulsive behavior, and relapse The connection between OCD, process addiction, and substance use disorder What dual diagnosis and mental health treatment looks like when you go beneath the surface Why so many people in addiction recovery are also carrying issues they've never named What long-term, thriving recovery actually looks like — not just white-knuckling it Whether you're in recovery from alcohol or drugs, struggling with a process addiction, dealing with trauma or mental health challenges, or loving someone who is — this episode will meet you where you are. Recorded live in front of clients at Camelback Recovery's Outpatient Treatment Center, this is the I Love Being Sober Podcast — real stories, real healing, real recovery.

Send us Fan MailOn-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centreLet's check that we are on the same page as we have a discussion about 'Values'. I am speaking about such things as being able to be Creative, have Integrity, Fitness, Security, Faith, Self Confidence, Wealth, Winning, Honesty and many more.In the cool light of day, we would never purposely/consciously/intentionally trash our Values. They are a part of us and how we do life, want to do life and choose to do life on planet earth.Our Values define us; define who we are; represent who we are; shape who we are. How dare you invite me to just flippantly get rid of one of my Values; destruct, destroy - trash my Values. Why on earth would anyone do that?So, my question is - when Sex/Porn addiction triggers arise and you 'Act out', is the fact of Acting out, an indication that you have just Trashed all of you Values?Can you see patterns of activities and behaviours which show you undermining those dearly held Values, which in other situations, you would and could never undermine or trash your Values. Look how you undermine and trash your Values when emotions - such as conflict with a partner - gets the better of you; also when 'Acting out' beckons. Neural Pathway repetitive hamster wheel patterns of behaviours (from past learned and even inherited scripts from family) may be at work repeatedly, but you did not notice, analyse or give credence to what you were doing? You were actually trashing and undermining your strongly held Values.Get some help from The Kairos Centre. See what you cannot see. Begin to change that which you begin to better understand.Bringing colour back to life - without Shame.Key words: sex addiction, addicted, partner, porn addiction, recovery, sex drive, therapy, sex therapy, podcast, relationships, relationship counseling, relationship advice, addiction, couples, couples therapy, sex therapy, emdr, love addiction, behavior,Support the show

Pastor Brian is joined by Mike Genung of Blazing Grace ministries to discuss pornography and sex addiction and the church.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Send us Fan MailOn-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centreIt is worth listening again to the first part of this topic (in a recent past episode) - entitled: Sex Addict - "I am not a Passive-Aggressive by my behaviours!" - This is a continuation of that topic talking about Core Emotional Needs. This is part 2 of how Passive-Aggressive behaviours can show up - as a way of trying to get Core Emotional Needs met.Do you know what are your top 3 most important Core Emotional Needs? Do you FIGHT like this? Do you FLIGHT like this? Do you Freeze like this? - but it is all about repeatedly practised behaviours as a attempt to get depleted Core Emotional Needs met. Some of them are: Approval, Acceptance, Support, Security, Comfort, Respect - amongst others.When Core motional Needs are depleted and at reserve levels, as human beings, we will do one of three things to try to get them met, since they are not negotiable. Critical levels will see us doing Fight, Flight and/or Freeze. Which one of those three do you think that you predominantly use? It may not actually be the obvious one that you first think you do. Listen to the two parts of this podcast and the examples of fight, flight , freeze which I demonstrate.Over 90% of the couples in conflict that we see in The Kairos Centre, have, at the root of their conflict - fight, flight, freeze - as they try to get their Core Emotional Needs met. Often, it will take the form of Passive-Aggressive behaviours. (This is a big deal which needs to be understood well).Get some help from The Kairos Centre. See what you cannot see. Begin to change that which you begin to better understand.Bringing colour back to life - without Shame.Key words: sex addiction, addicted, partner, porn addiction, recovery, sex drive, therapy, sex therapy, podcast, relationships, relationship counseling, relationship advice, addiction, couples, couples therapy, sex therapy, emdr, love addiction, behavior,Support the show

In this episode (335), we respond to a courageous submission from a betrayed partner who is navigating early recovery with her partner after multiple discovery days. Both partners have trauma histories, both are in individual therapy, and both are trying to understand what healthy sexual intimacy can look like after porn addiction, betrayal trauma, and past sexual coping patterns. Her questions center on lingerie, fantasies, kinks, dressing up, and whether these elements can ever be part of authentic intimacy—or whether they inevitably feed the pornified parts of the brain. We honor the depth and maturity of her questions because this is one of the most complex areas couples face in recovery.We emphasize that healthy sexuality cannot be reduced to a simple list of approved or forbidden behaviors. Lingerie, fantasy, experimentation, or sexual play may feel empowering and connecting for one couple, while feeling objectifying, unsafe, or triggering for another. The real questions are about intention, impact, consent, safety, presence, and whether each partner feels seen as a whole person. For the addict in recovery, this means asking whether he is truly present with his partner or superimposing old fantasy templates onto her. For the betrayed partner, it means asking whether she is freely choosing sexual expression or performing out of fear, people-pleasing, comparison, or the need to feel desirable and enough.We also discuss the role of a sex fast as a potentially powerful tool in recovery when it is done with transparency, structure, purpose, and ideally professional guidance. Taking sex off the table for a season can help reduce compulsive dependence on sex, create safety for the betrayed partner, and allow the couple to build other areas of intimacy that may have been neglected. But we caution that a sex fast should not become avoidance, silence, or emotional distancing. In the end, the goal is not to create a fear-based sexual relationship or to let pornography continue defining the bedroom. The goal is for the couple to consciously create a sexual relationship based on being rather than performing—where both partners are safe, present, authentic, fully seen, and deeply connected.For a full transcript of this podcast in article format, go to:  Healthy Sexuality or Pornified Performance? Navigating Lingerie, Fantasies, Kinks, etc., and Authentic Intimacy in RecoveryLearn more about Mark and Steve's revolutionary online porn/sexual addiction recovery and betrayal trauma healing program at—daretoconnectnow.comFind out more about Steve Moore at:  Ascension CounselingLearn more about Mark Kastleman at:  Reclaim Counseling Services

Elizabeth is joined by Gallo to talk about his sex addiction.Support Talking Shit About...MERCH SALE: 20% OFF EVERYTHING JUNE 1-9

Send us Fan MailOn-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centreGrab your popcorn, peanuts and a drink, this is a long episode. It is a bonus episode, bringing it all together in one episode.I was interviewed by Seen&heard (an organisation supporting those traumatised by boarding school attendance) - for whom I am one of their Directory of experienced Therapists working with those different Traumas.In this very personal and up close interview of me and my journey through childhood, adulthood and life, I look at various issues, including Insecure Attachment and its significant impact on me; transitioning from being the Solicitor, career changing to become the Therapist; title 't' Traumas & big 'T' Traumas.Intergenerational scripts from past family which adversely impacts us and sets up subsequent family members towards a trajectory; training to counsel Singles, Couples, Partners, Marrieds; me becoming a Psychosexual/Sex Therapist; then a specialist trained Sex, Porn & Love Addiction Therapist - where each of those Addictions are quite distinct from each other; specialist support for impacted partners - separate from the Addict - (particularly female partners traumatised by learning about the Sex/Porn/Love Addiction); Co-addictions and what is waiting in the wings when you try to get rid of Porn or Sex Addiction.Eye Movement Desensitisation Repossessing (EMDR); SHAME+ NARCISSISM = SEX/PORN ADDICTION; need for a 12 Steps Support Group; need to Diagnose the childhood development issues first - before a Recovery Programme; my Diagnostic sessions & the world's first Video-on-Demand (pre-recorded videos with workbooks) Recovery Programme; what is 'Love Addiction'.It is not weakness to need help from others at some point in our lives; it may be counselling for mental health issues. Compulsions get passed on to the next generation - the children; becoming sensitised to partner's body; Therapy with The Kairos Centre is about moving as much insights from the Unconscious into the Conscious.Get some help from The Kairos Centre. See what you cannot see. Begin to change that which you begin to better understand.Bringing colour back to life - without Shame.Key words: sex addiction, addicted, partner, porn addiction, recovery, sex drive, therapy, sex therapy, podcast, relationships, relationship counseling, relationship advice, addiction, couples, couples therapy, sex therapy, emdr, love addiction, behavior,Support the show

Send us Fan MailOn-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centreWhat is passive-aggressive behaviour? Do you fight like this? Passive-aggressive behaviour is when you express negative feelings indirectly instead of openly talking about them. It is a defence used to protect self. It might stem from early experiences and has become a way to protect self. It might also include feelings of rejection, fear, mistrust, insecurity and/or low self-esteem. It is often vindictive and a way of doing "fight' with someone.It is a way of expressing negative feelings, rather than talking openly about the issue which as caused upset. It is a way to communicate anger and other forms of distress, without openly acknowledging the emotions. It might take the form of action or inaction. An example might be, the person who attends an event (unwillingly), then is rude or hostile. Alternatively, it might be that they avoid the event and give a partner the “silent treatment.” That is overt aggression, adopted as a communication style, as revenge for an upset caused to them.Someone who uses passive aggression may feel angry, resentful, or frustrated, but they act neutral, pleasant, or even cheerful. They then find indirect ways to show how they really feel. They might say one thing, but do something quite contrary. They may do the thing they do not want to do and brood and complain whilst doing it.They might do something that seems kind (on the surface), but is opposite to the other person's expectation and preference. For example, someone who knows you are trying to lose weight, purposely buys a large sugary birthday cake for you.Passive aggression is a common coping mechanism that many people use from time to time, especially when they want to avoid direct conflict. People who engage in passive aggression may feel just as aggressive or hostile as those who adopt more overt forms of aggression.Anger, frustration, and displeasure are normal emotions. People who rely on passive aggression rather than direct communication to show these emotions often grew up in a family where that behaviour was common. It might not have felt safe for them to directly express their feelings as a child.Passive aggressive behaviour takes many forms but can generally be described as a non-verbal aggression that manifests in negative behavior - like these other examples:Limit/curtail communication: when clearly there is a problematic issue presentAvoiding/Ignoring/evading: because anger won't allow you to address the issue calmly Procrastinating: intentionally putting off something and knowing it will adversely affect the other person(s)Obstructing/deliberately stalling/preventing somethingAvoiding situations: where competition might show you in an unfavourable lightAmbiguity/cryptic/unclear: not fully engagingSulking/silent treatment/sullen/dogmatic: in order to get attention or sympathy.Purposely late: knowing that will offendThwarting/frustrating someone expectation: to be 'bloodyminded'Purposely forgetting key matters: to show a blatant disregard and disrespect Limiting/withholding/avoiding Intimacy: known to be liked by the other personMaking Excuses/coming up with reasons: for not doing thingsVictim role: so as to avoid taking responsibility for own roleGet some help from The Kairos Centre. See what you cannot see. Begin to change that which you begin to better understand.Bringing colour back to life - without Shame.Key words: sex addiction, addicted, partner, porn addiction, recovery, sex drive, therapy, sex therapy, podcast, relationships, relationship counseling, relationship advice, addiction, couples, couples therapy, sex therapy, emdr, love addiction, behavior,Support the show

Send us Fan MailOn-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centreLet's talk about how well you really know yourself. Remember that the addiction behaviours are all about self-soothing to manage emotions; a time of escape from life's issues for a while. It means that many other life skills for managing emotions such as stress, pressure, anxiety, upset and other normal emotions, may never have been learned in childhood, because the addiction behaviours became the 'go-to' drug of choice.Core Emotional NeedsWhich are your top 3 Core Emotional Needs? Is it Acceptance, Affection, Appreciation, Approval, Attention, Comfort, Encouragement, Respect, Security or Support? Be aware of your top 10 Core Emotional Needs, but even more importantly, be very sure that you know your top 3 core emotional needs. The very fact that we are human, means that we have these 10 core emotional needs, which have to be met. When life and circumstances do not keep these needs topped up and some dwindle beyond our critical level, then we will react, often unconsciously. Fight or flight will soon demand attention when our core emotional needs are not being met. Fight can take the form of creating conflicts, but not being aware that we are being more contentious than usual! Flight means that we move away from a situation, into a place where we think our needs will be better met. That can take the form of longer hours at work because work or the people in the work place bring a form of comfort. They are danger zones unless we begin to read the signs. Our partner plays a part in meeting our Core Emotional Needs, but they are not responsible. They cannot meet all of those needs. All of the systems within which we interact (such as work, home life, social, sports etc) play a part in meeting those needs, not one person only. In the survey to determine the top 10 Core Emotional Needs, most women can identify with the need for Security within their top 3. Most men chose Respect. Couples do an Exercise with me to identify their top 3 most important Core Emotional Needs.When you have ranked your top 3, try ranking your partner's top 3. Then have a discussion. What you do not know, then you cannot affect or do much about. What you know about and can see, then you can affect for good – or chose not to – but you now have choice! Get some help from The Kairos Centre. See what you cannot see. Begin to change that which you begin to better understand.Bringing colour back to life - without Shame.Key words: sex addiction, addicted, partner, porn addiction, recovery, sex drive, therapy, sex therapy, podcast, relationships, relationship counseling, relationship advice, addiction, couples, couples therapy, sex therapy, emdr, love addiction, behavior, psychology, codependency, sex life, neuroscience, sex ed, sober, sobriety, sexual dysfunction, relationship issues, sex coach, sexual, trauma, ptsd, sex science, The sex porn love Addiction Podcast, The Singles Partners Marrieds and Long Time Marrieds Podcast, Gary McFarlane, porn addiction, Support the show

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In this episode (#333), we address a question from a betrayed partner who is about three years into sex addiction recovery and betrayal trauma healing with her partner. Although he has been sober, involved in 12-step recovery, working with a sponsor, and the couple has gone through formal therapeutic disclosure, she still experiences intrusive mental images connected to his past acting out. We explain that these images are not evidence that she is failing in her healing. They are trauma responses. The early season of discovery, trickle-truth, searching for evidence, finding secret accounts and online ads, and trying to piece together reality created a chain of traumatic events that the nervous system may continue to store as danger.We discuss how intrusive thoughts can feel “random,” even when they are not. A betrayed partner may be triggered not only by obvious reminders of the betrayal, but also by subtle cues such as a tone of voice, silence, emotional distance, stress, fatigue, or even positive closeness. The body can remember danger before the conscious mind understands why. Because of this, healing includes learning to distinguish the past from the present through grounding tools, breath work, somatic calming, the 5-4-3-2-1 technique, journaling, orienting to current safety, and sometimes trauma-focused professional help such as EMDR, brainspotting, somatic therapy, or work with a CSAT or partner trauma specialist. The goal is not to erase memory, but to reduce the intensity, frequency, and dominance of the trauma response.We also emphasize that the addict in recovery can play a powerful role in helping rebuild present-day safety. When his partner is triggered, his job is not to collapse into shame, become defensive, or demand that she “move on.” Instead, he can stand shoulder to shoulder with her against the trauma, respond with genuine curiosity, validate the pain his actions caused, and use the language of safety: “I can see something is coming up for you. What do you need from me right now?” Proactive transparency, consistent check-ins, emotional vulnerability, and accountability help reduce the partner's need for hypervigilance. Ultimately, the measure of healing is not whether intrusive images never appear again, but whether they become less intense, less frequent, easier to recover from, and less able to rob the partner of peace in the present.For a full transcript of this podcast in article format, go to:  Why Do Intrusive Mental Images Still Hit Me—Even Years Into His Recovery?Learn more about Mark and Steve's revolutionary online porn/sexual addiction recovery and betrayal trauma healing program at—daretoconnectnow.comFind out more about Steve Moore at:  Ascension CounselingLearn more about Mark Kastleman at:  Reclaim Counseling Services

Send us Fan MailOn-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centre“I'm the author of my own life story.Unfortunately, I'm writing in pen and I can't erase my mistakes but my future will be better than my past.”  - Mr MeetTherapy with The Kairos Centre is all about helping you to better understand you. Helping to move as much of life's issues from the unconscious, from the unseen, from the invisible, into the conscious, into the seen, into the visible. That which you cannot seen, you have no hope of changing. Change begins when you can see some things. Therefore, it is useful to understand that Therapy with The Kairos Centre involves working with the unconscious, the unseen, the invisible.Here are the 3 Stages that is involved in every 50 minutes Therapy session - called The Egan 3 Stages:STAGE 1: EXPLORING - which is what takes place during each Therapy session, as we jump into the sand pit together in a curiosity way (not criticism), in order to see what we can find and move it into the consciousness, into the seen, into the visible. STAGE 2: REFLECTING (in order to gain INSIGHT & UNDERSTANDING) - This stage belongs entirely to you. It is all about what you do with the matters which we explored together in the session, so that you chew on them, you think about them, you reflect on them outside of the session. Since, as you do so, you gain insight and greater understanding. You use a highlighter pen to make issues visible. They can never be invisible again, even if you do not move to stage 3. You can now see some things that belong to you - based upon what we explored in stage 1.STAGE 3: ACTION/CHANGE - based upon the new insights & understanding gained, the question in front of you is - 'What ACTION/CHANGE do you what to set about implementing (or not)'. The choice belongs entirely to you and once made, The Kairos Centre continues to be alongside you to help you with the change process which you have decided upon. (You are not alone).Another useful tool to help you recognise blind spots, is 'Johari's window'. Here is a Youtube link with an explanation about it: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c7rlCgy6i88Knowledge is power and so in all your getting, get understanding. That is the beginning of wisdom. Get some help from The Kairos Centre. See what you cannot see. Begin to change that which you begin to better understand.Bringing colour back to life - without Shame.Key words: sex addiction, addicted, partner, porn addiction, recovery, sex drive, therapy, sex therapy, podcast, relationships, relationship counseling, relationship advice, addiction, couples, couples therapy, sex therapy, emdr, love addiction, behavior, psychology, codependency, sex life, neuroscience, sex ed, sober, sobriety, sexual dysfunction, relationship issues, sex coach, sexual, trauma, ptsd, sex science, The sex porn love Addiction Podcast, The Singles Partners Marrieds and Long Time Marrieds Podcast, Gary McFarlane, porn addiction, Support the show

Hi there readers! Ready to hear James Dobson talk about the birds and the bees? No? Too bad, that's what today's episode is. Jake and Brooke (and very special guest Josh Boerman from The Worst of All Possible Worlds) to talk about the next two videos in Dobson's classic "Focus on the Family" film series. And if I put what the conversation is about, I will ruin all SEO opportunities so you'll have to listen and find out what happens!Check out Josh's work:https://joshboerman.comhttps://www.patreon.com/cw/WorstOfAllhttps://illconceivedpodcast.comCheck out our Patreon!patreon.com/ihatejamesdobsonReferences:Kerner, I. (8 December 2016). Press Release on Sex Addiction. American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors and Therapists. https://www.aasect.org/sites/default/files/AASECT_Press_Release_on_Sex_Addiction.pdfn.a. (n.d.) AASECT Position on Sex Addiction. American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors and Therapists. https://www.aasect.org/position-sex-addictionMusic from #Uppbeat (free for Creators!):https://uppbeat.io/t/mood-maze/trendsetterLicense code: 9OT2MTBHWWSRZP5S Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Send us Fan MailOn-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centreThe Law of Sustainment refers to the principle that your ability to maintain progress towards your goals is closely tied to your self-image and identity. If your inner beliefs do not align with your aspirations, it can lead to inconsistency and failure to achieve lasting change.Put slightly differently: It says 'If you see yourself in a certain way, you'll find it hard to sustain lasting change'.Can you identify with anything in this poem?The world's finest Apple  A poem by Julian R. Smith"You must learn that you cannot be loved by all people You can be the finest apple in the world - ripe, juicy, sweet, succulent - and offer yourself to all. But you must remember that there will be people who do not like apples.  You must understand that if you are the world's finest apple, and someone you love does not like apples, you have the choice of becoming a banana. But you must be warned that if you choose to become a banana you will be a second-rate banana. But you can always be the finest apple.  You must also realise that if you choose to be a second-rate banana. There will be people who do not like bananas. Furthermore, You can spend your life trying to become the best banana - which is impossible if you are an apple - or you can seek again to be the finest apple".What is clear is that somewhere in the past, something happened - usually in the childhood development period. You now find yourself trying to please people - to fit in and be accepted. You try to present a version of you to the people in the 'system' you are currently interacting in, in order to be accepted.If that means changing from being an Apple, to a Banana, then so be it. Being accepted in that grouping is the most important factor. Therefore you constantly metamorphorise in order to please and be accepted.The problem: You never identified and evolved into being the real authentic you or you lost the real authentic you.So - 'standup the real authentic you' - becomes futile because the real authentic you is not known. 'Mirror, Mirror on the wall, who is the fairest of them all' - will get the response - 'Well it's all those others, isn't it!'The Russian doll image best illustrates the protected Inner child deep inside the layers - being protected from the hostile world.Get some help from The Kairos Centre. See what you cannot see. Begin to change that which you begin to better understand.Help is here for you: bit.ly/pornaddictionhelpGary McFarlane (BA, LLM, Dip, Certs), Accredited EMDR Practitioner.Key words: sex addiction, addicted, partner, porn addiction, recovery, sex drive, therapy, sex therapy, podcast, relationships, relationship counseling, relationship advice, addiction, couples, couples therapy, sex therapy, emdr, love addiction, behavior, psychology, codependency, sex life, neuroscience, sex ed, sobriety, sexual dysfunction, relationship issues, sex coach, sexual, trauma, ptsd, sex science, The sex porn love Addiction Podcast, The Singles Partners Marrieds and Long Time Marrieds Podcast, Gary McFarlane, porn addiction, what neuroscience says, neuroscience, sex, sex addict, porn, recovery, porn addiction issue, porn addiction in teens, sex addiction in teensSupport the show

Send us Fan MailOn-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centreIn this episode, let's say it all in poetry.My Brain And Heart Divorced – John RoedelMy brain and heart divorced a decade ago over who was to blame about how big of a mess I have become eventually, they couldn't be in the same room with each othernow my head and heart share custody of meI stay with my brain during the weekand my heart gets me on weekendsthey never speak to one another– instead, they give me the same note to pass to each other every weekand their notes they send to one another always says the same thing:“This is all your fault”on Sundays my heart complains about how my head has let me downin the pastand on Wednesday my head lists all of the times my heart has screwed things up for me in the futurethey blame each other for the state of my lifethere's been a lot of yelling – and crying so,lately, I've been spending a lot of time with my gutwho serves as my unofficial therapistmost nights, I sneak out of the window in my ribcageand slide down my spine and collapse on my gut's plush leather chairthat's always open for me~ and I just sit sit sit sit until the sun comes uplast evening, my gut asked me if I was having a hard time being caught between my heart and my headI noddedI said I didn't know if I could live with either of them anymore“my heart is always sad about something that happened yesterdaywhile my head is always worried about something that may happen tomorrow,”I lamentedmy gut squeezed my hand“I just can't live with my mistakes of the past or my anxiety about the future,”I sighedmy gut smiled and said:“in that case, you should go stay with your lungs for a while,”I was confused– the look on my face gave it away“if you are exhausted about your heart's obsession with the fixed past and your mind's focus on the uncertain futureyour lungs are the perfect place for youthere is no yesterday in your lungs there is no tomorrow there eitherthere is only nowthere is only inhalethere is only exhalethere is only this momentthere is only breathand in that breath you can rest while your heart and head worktheir relationship out.”this morning, while my brain was busy reading tea leavesand while my heart was staringat old photographs I packed a little bag and walked to the door ofmy lungsbefore I could even knock she opened the door with a smile and asa gust of air embraced me she said“what took you so long?”~ John Roedel -----"It isn't that they can't see the solution. It is that they can't see the problem." — G.K. Chesterton.-----"To have a right to do a thing is not at all the same as to be right in doing it." — G.K. Chesterton-----"It isn't that they can't see the solution. It is that they can't see the problem." — G.K. Chesterton-----"Action springs not from thought, but from a readiness for responsibility" — Dietrich Bonhoeffer-----“It sounded an excellent plan, no doubt, and very neatly and simply arrangedThe only difficulty was, that she had not the smallest idea how to set about it....” (Alice in Wonderland, Lewis Carroll)Get some help from The Kairos Centre. Support the show

Send us Fan MailOn-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centreMany people think that pornography consumption is harmless. Studies, however, have proven that regular consumption can have a negative impact on the brain. Prolonged exposure can alter brain structures, brain functioning and therefore, behaviour patterns. (A Recovery Programme is all about rewiring the brain).Frequency of use, existing or prior mental health conditions, age of exposure and the type of pornographic content, are important factors. Porn impacts a developing brain differently than a mature brain. Such matters as violent porn are factors that does a different type of impact. Changes in the reward centre, cognitive functioning and emotional regulation are key areas of interest in neuropsychology.The Pleasure and Reward Centre: The brain's primary reward neurotransmitter is Dopamine and it is released during pleasure activities whenever you experience pleasure. Repeated release of dopamine over time, alters the reward centre of the brain. You will find that over time, you desire more stimulus to achieve the same result. Regular use of porn causes highs and lows and the brain starts to create new patterns that drive a person to continue watching porn. It remembers the reward.Cognitive Function: Individuals who suffer from compulsive use of porn, often struggle with cognitive functioning. There may be impaired decision-making, but they do not know it. For example, going after the immediate short-term gain, despite the much bigger potential consequences which is all so apparent and a seemingly illogical decision to take such risks. There may be cognitive blind spots where you cannot so readily disurn the negative consequences of the behaviour; instead, going for immediate gratification - rather than delayed gratification; even trashing own personal values, moral codes and ethics.Emotional Regulation: The difficulty regulating emotions will show up in constantly reaching out for the quick fix of porn viewing, Sex or Love Addiction behaviours, to regular emotions; thereby, reinforcing the well grooved out neural pathway pairing which has taken place. Remember that the Frontal/Pre-cortex/logical reasoning decision-making part of the brain has gone offline during the 'Acting out'. Major bridge-burning decisions are being taken in the Limbic area of the brain. 'I feel, so I do'. When the behaviours are brought to an end and the Pre-Cortex comes back online - hearing you ask it the question - "What a waste of time. Why did I just do that?". It's reply will be - "Why are you asking us. We were offline at the time!"Neurological Impact of Porn Addiction: Neuropsychology and neuroscience are the fields which feed us the explanations about these dynamics, which explores how the brain and nervous system shape behaviour and cognition. MRI Scans have demonstrated the potency of the generated Dopamine, Serotonin and Oxytocin mix effect on the brain - as a similar impact to illegal drugs. I might be somewhat provocative with my clients (forewarning them beforehand!) - that they are in fact 'drug addicts'. They are not addicted to illegal street drugs, but have become addicted to the potent neurochemical (self-manufactured chemicals) in the body, generated from the sex and porn behaviours.Get some help from The Kairos Centre. See what you cannot see. Begin to change that which you begin to better understand.Help is here for you: bit.ly/pornaddictionhelpKey words: sex addiction, addicted, partner, porn addiction, recovery, sex drive, therapy, sexSupport the show

Send us Fan MailOn-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centreThe antidote to Narcissism is Empathy. (Sympathy and Empathy are very different). Narcissism and Empathy cannot co-exist at high levels together in the same person. (Both cannot be seen being used at high levels in the same person). There will always be a high level of one and a low level of the other. Make sure Empathy is the one that is practised at a high level, in how you do life. (You will need some help to do change to achieve it!)This second definition of NARCISSISM which I use is rather academic and wordy, but it works for some clients:"Narcissism is a psychological disorder associated with grandiosity, a need for admiration and a lack of empathy. Narcissistic traits tend to run on a continuum. A higher psychologically functioning narcissist is often successful and charming but may have intimacy problems in relationships. A person who has a more severe form of narcissism may appear nearly delusional with their grandiosity and may act out destructively when they feel criticized. Narcissistic behavior involves much idealization and devaluation. Characteristics involve grandiosity, entitlement, lack of empathy, idealization of self and devaluation of others.Narcissistic damage occurs when a child's vulnerable and developing core sense of self is not seen and reflected back by the adults around him/her. Each child is born a unique individual with special gifts and personal challenges, multi-layered and both simple and complex. For any one layer to develop, that part of the child needs to be seen, heard, understood and valued. Parents have to be present to be mirrors—to bear witness and reflect back. Healthy, grounded parents help young people build a frame of reference for living. When a parent's own woundedness and unmet needs override their ability to be present to a child or a parent's undeveloped parts of self render them unable to respond to a child's vulnerable and authentic needs, the child's core sense of self can be lost, fragmented or undeveloped. The loss, fragmentation and lack of development of the core sense of self is the root of the narcissistic wound. Raw, broken, undeveloped and lost, we enter a cold cruel world ill-equipped to relate, define fulfilment from the inside out and connect with the spirit of life. When our primal wiring meets the world we live in today characterized by disconnection at personal, family and social levels, we experience a helplessness and aloneness that is beyond what we are biologically prepared to embrace. Narcissistic wounding is sometimes referred to as the emptiness wound".Get some help from The Kairos Centre. See what you cannot see. Begin to change that which you begin to better understand.Help is here for you: bit.ly/pornaddictionhelpGary McFarlane (BA, LLM, Dip, Certs), Accredited EMDR Practitioner.Key words: sex addiction, addicted, partner, porn addiction, recovery, sex drive, therapy, sex therapy, podcast, relationships, relationship counseling, relationship advice, addiction, couples, couples therapy, sex therapy, emdr, love addiction, behavior, psychology, codependency, sex life, neuroscience, sex ed, sober, sobriety, sexual dysfunction, relationship issues, sex coach, sexual, trauma, ptsd, sex science, The sex porn love Addiction Podcast, The Singles Partners Marrieds and Long Time Marrieds Podcast, Gary McFarlane, porn addiction, what neuroscience says, neuroscience, Support the show

This week we have questions from a writer who shares the drama of two friends flirting with one another, another writer with a hypothetical dilemma of a therapist whose client is their boyfriends worst enemy, and finally a writer who wonders if they meet the criteria for sex addiction. Check out Nick's "Fitness Challenge": https://www.mentalfitpersonaltraining.com/podtherapy Join our patreon!Listen ad-free, get the show a day early and enjoy the pre-show hang out on the same app you're using RIGHT NOW at www.Patreon.com/Therapy where you can also access our vast library of deep dives, interviews, skill shares, reviews and rants as well as our live discord chat!If you are an Apple user please rate us!If you are a Spotify user, please rate us!Submit a question to the show!Help us reach #1 on Goodpods!Interested in Nick's mental health approach to fitness? Check out www.MentalFitPersonalTraining.comCheck out Dr. Jim's book "Dadvice: 50 Fatherly Life Lessons" at www.DadviceBook.comGrab some swag at our store, www.PodTherapyBaitShop.comPlay Jim's Neurotic Bingo at home while you listen to the show, or don't, I'm not your supervisor.Submit questions to:www.PodTherapy.netPodTherapyGuys@gmail.comFollow us on Social Media:FacebookInstagramTwitterResources:Suicide Prevention Lifeline - 1-800-273-8255.Veterans Crisis Line - 1-800-273-8255.Substance Abuse & Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA) National Helpline - (1-800-662-HELP (4357)OK2Talk Helpline Teen Helpline - 1 (800) 273-TALKU.S. Mental Health Resources Hotline - 211

Sex addiction is real, but most people don't actually understand what it is. This week, Liat sits down with renowned therapist and author Dr. Rob Weiss (Seeking Integrity, Sex Addiction 101) to break down compulsive sexual behavior and why it's now recognized as CSBD.They unpack the signs, the stigma, the role of shame, and what real intimacy actually looks like. Plus, why the conversation has changed from “this isn't real” to “how can we help people with this issue.”Connect with Dr. Rob:WebsiteYoutubeTikTokFacebookInstagramLinkedInSex, Love and Addiction PodcastSex and Relationship Healing Podcast Behavior Concepts Covered:MOAntecedentDeterminismCMO-SConnect with Behavior Bitches:• Instagram: @behaviorbitches• Facebook: Behavior Bitches Podcast• Youtube: Behavior Bitches Podcast• Website: BehaviorBitches.com• Contact Us: For podcast inquiries, episode ideas, or just to say hi, email us at behaviorbitches@studynotesaba.comLeave us a 5-star review on Spotify or in the Apple Podcast App and make us super happy!Looking for BCBA Exam Prep, CEUs, or a BCBA Job?• Whether you need help passing the BCBA exam, are looking to earn CEUs, or want to find your perfect career match, Study Notes ABA has you covered. Check out our website for comprehensive exam prep materials, CEUs, job matching and more.• Test Prep: StudyNotesABA.com• CEUs: CEU.StudyNotesABA.com• PairABA: PairABA.co

Send us Fan MailOn-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centreHere is my mathematical formula - as we look at Narcissism:SHAME + NARCISSISM = SEX, PORN, LOVE ADDICTIONI am not saying that those with Sex, Porn, Love Addiction are Narcissists. (Some may have NPD (Narcissistic Personality Disorder)). What I am saying is that all of my clients with Sex, Porn, Love Addiction, have traits which come out of NPD.Most of my clients will initially reject the suggestion that they have such traits - (me, myself & I focus) - until I explain the definition. Here is one of the definitions of Narcissism which I use. (In a past episode, I gave you the shorter simplified definition). This one is the longer, much more academic version:"Narcissism is a psychological disorder associated with grandiosity, a need for admiration and a lack of empathy. Narcissistic traits tend to run on a continuum. A higher psychologically functioning narcissist is often successful and charming but may have intimacy problems in relationships. A person who has a more severe form of narcissism may appear nearly delusional with their grandiosity and may act out destructively when they feel criticized. Narcissistic behavior involves much idealization and devaluation. Characteristics involve grandiosity, entitlement, lack of empathy, idealization of self and devaluation of others.Narcissistic damage occurs when a child's vulnerable and developing core sense of self is not seen and reflected back by the adults around him/her. Each child is born a unique individual with special gifts and personal challenges, multi-layered and both simple and complex. For any one layer to develop, that part of the child needs to be seen, heard, understood and valued. Parents have to be present to be mirrors—to bear witness and reflect back. Healthy, grounded parents help young people build a frame of reference for living. When a parent's own woundedness and unmet needs override their ability to be present to a child or a parent's undeveloped parts of self render them unable to respond to a child's vulnerable and authentic needs, the child's core sense of self can be lost, fragmented or undeveloped. The loss, fragmentation and lack of development of the core sense of self is the root of the narcissistic wound. Raw, broken, undeveloped and lost, we enter a cold cruel world ill-equipped to relate, define fulfilment from the inside out and connect with the spirit of life. When our primal wiring meets the world we live in today characterized by disconnection at personal, family and social levels, we experience a helplessness and aloneness that is beyond what we are biologically prepared to embrace. Narcissistic wounding is sometimes referred to as the emptiness wound".Get some help from The Kairos Centre. See what you cannot see. Begin to change that which you begin to better understand.Help is here for you: bit.ly/pornaddictionhelpGary McFarlane (BA, LLM, Dip, Certs), Accredited EMDR Practitioner.Key words: sex addiction, addicted, partner, porn addiction, recovery, sex drive, therapy, sex therapy, podcast, relationships, relationship counseling, relationship advice, addiction, couples, couples therapy, sex therapy, emdr, love addiction, behavior, psychology, codependency, sex life, neuroscience, sex ed, sober, sobriety, sexual dysfunction, relationship issues, sex coach, sexual, trauma, ptsd, sex science, The sex porn love Addiction Podcast, The Singles Partners Marrieds and Long Time Marrieds Podcast, Gary McFarlane, porn addiction, what Support the show

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Sex Addiction and the Believer Pastor Brian sits down with Mike Genung, founder of Blazing Grace Ministry to discuss pornography, sex addiction, and adultery, and how to find victory over sin and restoration of relationship.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

How well do you know the sex addiction cycle? In this powerful episode of the Faithful & True Podcast, Mark Laaser unpacks the sex addiction cycle, revealing how shame, coping, and core beliefs drive patterns of sex addiction and porn addiction.Discover how preoccupation, ritual, and acting out behaviors are fueled by deeper wounds—and why breaking the cycle requires more than just stopping behavior. This conversation offers hope for both men struggling with addiction and partners healing from betrayal trauma, pointing toward lasting marriage recovery and posttraumatic growth.

In Episode 326, we highlight the critical truth that both addiction and betrayal trauma are fueled by isolation and secrecy, making community an essential part of the healing process. Addicts often withdraw due to shame and fear of judgment, while betrayed partners frequently feel alone, confused, and unable to share their reality with others. This shared isolation deepens pain on both sides and reinforces destructive cycles. However, when individuals step into a supportive recovery community, they begin to break that isolation, realizing they are not alone and that others truly understand their experience.Community plays several vital roles in recovery. It normalizes the experience by helping individuals overcome “terminal uniqueness” and recognize shared struggles. It provides accountability, which is nearly impossible to achieve in isolation, and helps individuals stay aligned with their values and recovery goals. It also offers outside perspective, clears distorted thinking, and creates opportunities to learn and practice healthy relational skills. Additionally, connection with others has a direct biological impact, helping regulate the nervous system and reduce stress responses, which is essential for both addicts and partners navigating emotional triggers.Perhaps most importantly, community sustains hope when it is most needed. Recovery is a long and difficult journey, and there will be times when individuals feel discouraged or question whether healing is possible. In those moments, seeing others who are further along the path provides reassurance and renewed motivation. Community becomes a place where individuals can borrow strength and belief from others until they can stand firmly again on their own. Ultimately, this article reinforces a foundational principle: true and lasting recovery does not happen alone—it happens in connection.For a full transcript of this podcast in article format, go to:   The NECESSITY of Community in Recovery & Healing for Addicts and Betrayed PartnersLearn more about Mark and Steve's revolutionary online porn/sexual addiction recovery and betrayal trauma healing program at—daretoconnectnow.comFind out more about Steve Moore at:  Ascension CounselingLearn more about Mark Kastleman at:  Reclaim Counseling Services

SCOTT STOLARIK is a clinical psychotherapist who specializes in trauma resolution, sexual addiction, couples therapy, and work with forensic populations. His trauma-informed expertise and Level II E.M.D.R. training offer not just clinical know-how but a grounded wisdom for both mental health professionals and those on healing journeys. At Mosaic Pathway Counseling, Scott supports individuals and couples working through anxiety, depression, and addiction, helping unheard voices transform their stories. Scott's commitment to cultivating safe therapeutic environments aligns beautifully with holistic health. With post Master's training in leadership, his perspective bridges clinical practice with growth and empowerment.  

In this episode, Duane Osterlind sits down with Dr. Alexandra Katehakis, founder of the Center for Healthy Sex, to explore the complex relationship between shame, affect dysregulation, and addiction. Dr. Katehakis breaks down why shame isn't just a "bad feeling" but a survival-based biological process rooted in our nervous system and early childhood development.Key Highlights1. What is Shame? (The Gut Connection)Shame is a pro-social function embedded in the human organism from birth. Unlike many other emotions, shame is primarily located in the enteric nervous system (the gut).The Biology: When we experience shame, we feel a visceral "drop." This is a rapid shift from a high-dopamine state (joy or excitement) to a low-dopamine state (collapse).The "No" Moment: Around 18 months, a child experiences the "genesis of shame" when a parent must use a firm "No" to protect them. In a healthy relationship, this is a temporary state.2. Rupture and Repair: The Building Blocks of ResilienceHealthy Dyad: A parent shames a child (rupture) but immediately follows up with soothing and "motherese" (repair). This teaches the child's nervous system how to regulate itself.Toxic Shame: When shaming is chronic and unrepaired, "states become traits." The child remains in a collapsed, shame-based state, leading to pathological dissociation or chronic depression.3. Addiction as "Auto-Regulation"Dr. Katehakis posits that addiction is often a result of affect dysregulation. If a person lacks the internal capacity to regulate their emotions (due to a lack of interactive regulation in childhood), they turn to external sources to "auto-regulate."The Cycle: People use substances or behaviors (sex, gambling, shopping) to escape the painful, "dead" feeling of a shame-based core.The Body: Chronic shame results in low dopamine tone, often manifesting as a "limp" or depleted physical presence.4. Shame and IdentityShame deeply impacts how we view ourselves and interact with the world:External Locus of Control: Without internal regulation, people look outward for validation, often leading to poor boundaries and becoming susceptible to exploitation.The Victim/Perpetrator Paradox: In adulthood, those with toxic shame may "perpetrate from a victim position." They use their shame to avoid accountability, forcing partners to caretake them rather than addressing the original issue.Recovery and HopeHealing from chronic shame is a long-term process (often 3–5 years), but change is possible:Ownership: Admitting to the behaviors and secrets without defense or minimization.Community: Utilizing 12-step programs or therapy to experience "interactive regulation" with others.Healthy Shame: Learning to use shame as a pro-social "lane marker" that helps us stay in integrity, rather than a weight that collapses our identity."You can't undo shame by yourself. You really have to have a community of concern to help you through it." — Dr. Alexandra KatehakisResources MentionedBooks: Sex Addiction as Affect Dysregulation by Alexandra Katehakis.Experts: Allan Schore (Affect Regulation), Bruce Perry (Trauma and Development), Dan Siegel (Attachment).Center for Healthy Sex: Located in Los Angeles, CA. Sex Addiction as Affect Dysregulation: A Neurobiological Relational Modelhttps://theaddictedmind.com/If you live in California and are looking for counseling or therapy please check out Novus Mindful Life Counseling and Recovery CenterNovusMindfulLife.comWe want to hear from you. Leave us a message or ask us a question: https://www.speakpipe.com/addictedmindDisclaimerSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Sexual addiction is often treated as a behavior problem. Stop the behavior. Remove the temptation. Try harder next time. But what if the behavior is not the real issue? What if the patterns that bring shame, secrecy, and self-sabotage are actually revealing something deeper about the story you carry? This week on Win Today, therapist and researcher Jay Stringer joins me to unpack the anatomy of sexual addiction and unwanted sexual behavior. Drawing from research involving more than 3,800 men and women, Jay explains why these patterns are rarely random and how the unresolved parts of our past often shape them. We talk about why shame keeps people trapped in destructive cycles, why curiosity is often the first step toward healing, and why grief has the surprising power to reshape what we desire. Sexual struggles are not simply moral failures to suppress. They can become a roadmap that leads us toward the healing we have avoided. If you are stuck in patterns you cannot explain, if shame has kept you silent, or if you've tried to manage the behavior without understanding the story behind it, this episode will help you see why real freedom begins with honesty. Guest Bio Jay Stringer is a licensed therapist, minister, and researcher who helps men and women understand and outgrow unwanted sexual behaviors. He is the author of the award-winning book Unwanted: How Sexual Brokenness Reveals Our Way to Healing, based on a multiyear research study involving more than 3,800 men and women exploring the roots of sexual addiction and compulsive sexual behavior. Jay is also the creator of the Sexual Behavior Self-Assessment and The Journey Course, a five-month program designed to help individuals identify and transform the deeper drivers behind destructive patterns. He holds an MDiv and a master's degree in counseling psychology from The Seattle School of Theology and Psychology and completed post-graduate training under Dr. Dan Allender while serving as a Senior Fellow at The Allender Center. Show Partner SafeSleeve designs a phone case that blocks up to 99% of harmful EMF radiation—so I'm not carrying that kind of exposure next to my body all day. It's sleek, durable, and most importantly, lab-tested by third parties. The results aren't hidden—they're published right on their site. And that matters because many so-called EMF blockers on the market either don't work or can't prove they do. We protect our hearts and minds—why wouldn't we protect our bodies too? Head to safesleevecases.com and use the code WINTODAY10 for 10% off your order. Episode Links Show Notes Buy my book "Healing What You Can't Erase" here! Invite me to speak at your church or event. Connect with me @WINTODAYChris on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, and YouTube.

Episode 321 addresses a vulnerable question from a man in recovery who fears he may have “overcorrected”—moving from sexual addiction to sexual numbness. After establishing over a year of sobriety, he wonders if suppressing his sexuality has led to aversion rather than health. We explain that this phase is not uncommon. Sobriety is essential, but it is only the beginning. When years of compulsive behavior have rewired the dopamine system, removing intense stimulation can initially feel flat. The brain and body require time to recalibrate, and during that process, desire may feel muted.We also explore the powerful role of shame and fear in suppressing healthy arousal. Many addicts carry beliefs that they no longer deserve sexual enjoyment because of the harm they caused. Unresolved shame can shut down vulnerability, which is essential for authentic intimacy. Additionally, medical variables such as stress and hormone imbalance should be ruled out, as libido is influenced by both emotional and biological factors. Healthy sexuality looks very different from addiction-driven intensity—it is relational, emotionally connected, and often built on appreciation rather than urgency.Ultimately, the goal of recovery is not sexual suppression but integration. Guardrails—healthy boundaries—are necessary to maintain safety, but walls built from fear prevent growth. As couples move from repair into creation, they can collaboratively define what authentic intimacy looks like for them. With patience, grace, and ongoing emotional connection, sexuality can evolve from something compulsive and destructive into a conscious, shared celebration of closeness and love.For a full transcript of this podcast in article format, go to:  Guardrails or walls—Moving from Sexual Aversion to Healthy Intimacy in Recovery Learn more about Mark and Steve's revolutionary online porn/sexual addiction recovery and betrayal trauma healing program at—daretoconnectnow.comFind out more about Steve Moore at:  Ascension CounselingLearn more about Mark Kastleman at:  Reclaim Counseling Services

Did you know there are different levels of sexual addiction?On this week's podcast, Dr. Mark Laaser discusses the multiple levels of sexual addiction, what they are, and how important it is to understand your own level of acting out. Send a text

My podcast guest is Dr. Kervins Clement and his story is one that I hear about all the time- where a dependency on porn use and masturbation is justified as helping the relationship when, in fact, it often does the opposite. In this episode we explore:How Kervins' own recovery shaped the way he now works with men and couples.What his research revealed about the role of culture and history in treating Black men with sex addiction.Why guilt and remorse don't reliably stop lying and secrecy in addiction.What partners actually need after betrayal and where their focus often goes too soon.This is a thoughtful, nuanced conversation that isn't just about sex addiction- it's about honesty, courage and what healing truly requires.Get all the details about Janna's coaching program for couples, Doing It Together. Next round runs June/July 2026.Janna's Wanting It More Foundations self-paced course for women is always open for registration.Get immediate access to Janna's free video series for women, The Low Libido Myth.Leave a podcast review: We'd so appreciate your ​rating and review​ to help the podcast reach more couples.