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WHAT HOLDS WHEN THE WORLD SHAKES Gordon Dabbs, PhD Psalm 2 Psalm 2.1 (NLT) Why are the nations so angry? Why do they waste their time with futile plans? Brett McCracken. On any given day we are left inflamed by whatever grievances the Internet has exposed us to, yet we are impotent to do much, if anything, about it. The endless conveyor belt of content puts more things on our radar in a day than people a century ago would encounter in a year – often about places we've never heard of and issues we didn't know were issues. Psalm 2.4 (NIV) The One enthroned in heaven laughs; the Lord scoffs at them. What holds when the world shakes? Where do we stand when the storm hits? The storm reveals the shelter. Our attention is being discipled by outrage. What gets my attention gets access to my soul. What is shaping me? You can be a Christian in belief and still be discipled by outrage in practice. The answer is learning to care from a place of praise rather than panic. Psalm 2.11 (NLT) Serve the Lord with reverent fear, and rejoice with trembling. Psalm 2.12 (NIV) Blessed are all who take refuge in him. The final word of the psalm is not rage. It is refuge.Subscribe to PRESTONCREST - with Gordon Dabbs on Soundwise
WHAT HOLDS WHEN THE WORLD SHAKES Gordon Dabbs, PhD Psalm 2 Psalm 2.1 (NLT) Why are the nations so angry? Why do they waste their time with futile plans? Brett McCracken. On any given day we are left inflamed by whatever grievances the Internet has exposed us to, yet we are impotent to do much, if anything, about it. The endless conveyor belt of content puts more things on our radar in a day than people a century ago would encounter in a year – often about places we've never heard of and issues we didn't know were issues. Psalm 2.4 (NIV) The One enthroned in heaven laughs; the Lord scoffs at them. What holds when the world shakes? Where do we stand when the storm hits? The storm reveals the shelter. Our attention is being discipled by outrage. What gets my attention gets access to my soul. What is shaping me? You can be a Christian in belief and still be discipled by outrage in practice. The answer is learning to care from a place of praise rather than panic. Psalm 2.11 (NLT) Serve the Lord with reverent fear, and rejoice with trembling. Psalm 2.12 (NIV) Blessed are all who take refuge in him. The final word of the psalm is not rage. It is refuge.Subscribe to PRESTONCREST - with Gordon Dabbs on Soundwise
Subscribe to PRESTONCREST - with Gordon Dabbs on Soundwise
How could someone come home, tell you they love you, laugh with you, make plans for the future, and still hide an affair? That contradiction is one of the most disturbing parts of infidelity. It can leave you questioning whether the loving moments were real, whether your partner was secretly a completely different person, and whether your entire relationship was some kind of carefully constructed illusion. In this episode, I explain how compartmentalization allows someone to separate their marriage, affair, values, and self-image into different mental categories. We will look at how partial truths, selective attention, and self-protective stories can help someone continue seeing themselves as a good person while repeatedly making choices that violate their own stated values. I also explain why describing an affair as “one mistake” can hide the many smaller decisions that made it possible, what genuine accountability actually requires, and why betrayed partners should look for more than affection or transparency when deciding whether someone is becoming trustworthy. If you are struggling to make sense of what happened, stop replaying the contradictions, or feel safe in your own judgment again, you can book a free call with me. We will talk through what you are experiencing, what you want to change, and whether my approach is the right fit for helping you move forward.
Being cheated on doesn't just break your heart. It can change how your brain responds to safety, trust, and uncertainty. After infidelity, you may experience intrusive thoughts, emotional flooding, constant checking, comparison, panic, numbness, or the feeling that another painful discovery is always around the corner. These reactions are sometimes described as post-infidelity stress disorder, or PISD. Although PISD is not an official diagnosis, the trauma-like symptoms of romantic betrayal can feel very real. In this episode, I explain: • Why your brain becomes hypervigilant after betrayal • Why reassurance and checking rarely create lasting safety • Why new information can feel like a completely new betrayal • How self-blame creates an illusion of control • Why moving forward can feel unsafe • How healing helps you rebuild trust in yourself Healing does not mean ignoring red flags, blindly trusting your partner, or pretending the betrayal never happened. It means reaching a place where the affair feels like something that happened to you, not something your mind and body believe is still happening. Whether you are staying, leaving, or still deciding, you do not have to navigate this alone. Together, we can identify what is keeping you stuck, understand the deeper emotional patterns behind your reactions, and create a path toward clarity, stability, and self-trust.
Does it make a meaningful difference if an unfaithful partner confessed to cheating vs if they only admitted the truth after getting caught? In this episode, I explain the difference between remorse and distress, why being caught does not necessarily mean someone can never change, and what matters far more than the circumstances of the initial disclosure. Ultimately, the clearest evidence comes from how they behave now: whether they volunteer the truth, tolerate difficult conversations, take responsibility without deflecting, and become consistently honest without needing to be monitored. If you are struggling to determine whether your partner is genuinely changing, or you cannot stop replaying the betrayal and questioning what is real, book a free call with me below. We can talk through what you are experiencing and what it would take for you to feel clear, grounded, and emotionally free again.
WHY THE WORLD IS ALWAYS ANGRY Gordon Dabbs, PhD Psalm 2 Psalm 2.1-2 (NLT) Why are the nations so angry? Why do they waste their time with futile plans? The kings of the earth prepare for battle; the rulers plot together against the Lord and against his anointed one. WHY IS EVERYONE SO ANGRY? Psalm 2.3 (ESV) Let us burst their bonds apart and cast away their cords from us. Psalm 2.3 (NLT) Let us break their chains,” they cry, “and free ourselves from slavery to God. The world is angry because the world resists God's rightful rule. The world is angry because we are too easily ruled by fear. Psalm 2.4 (NIV) The One enthroned in heaven laughs; the Lord scoffs at them. Psalm 2.11 (NLT) Serve the Lord with reverent fear, and rejoice with trembling.Subscribe to PRESTONCREST - with Gordon Dabbs on Soundwise
WHY THE WORLD IS ALWAYS ANGRY Gordon Dabbs, PhD Psalm 2 Psalm 2.1-2 (NLT) Why are the nations so angry? Why do they waste their time with futile plans? The kings of the earth prepare for battle; the rulers plot together against the Lord and against his anointed one. WHY IS EVERYONE SO ANGRY? Psalm 2.3 (ESV) Let us burst their bonds apart and cast away their cords from us. Psalm 2.3 (NLT) Let us break their chains,” they cry, “and free ourselves from slavery to God. The world is angry because the world resists God's rightful rule. The world is angry because we are too easily ruled by fear. Psalm 2.4 (NIV) The One enthroned in heaven laughs; the Lord scoffs at them. Psalm 2.11 (NLT) Serve the Lord with reverent fear, and rejoice with trembling.Subscribe to PRESTONCREST - with Gordon Dabbs on Soundwise
After betrayal, it can feel unbearable to watch the person who hurt you move on as though nothing happened. You may find yourself waiting for karma, consequences, or some sign that they finally understand the damage they caused. In this episode, I talk about why that desire for justice makes sense, what karma may actually look like, and how waiting for them to suffer can keep you emotionally attached to the very person you are trying to heal from. If infidelity or betrayal is still controlling how you feel, think, or live, book a free call with me to learn how we can address what exactly is keeping you stuck.
DEEPER is a series designed for all ages to grow in God's word! This cover-to-cover study of the Bible, Genesis to Revelation, is a weekly opportunity for the entire family to be encouraged, challenged, and edified.Subscribe to PRESTONCREST - with Gordon Dabbs on Soundwise
Being cheated on can continue affecting you long after the relationship ends. Even when your new partner has done nothing wrong, a missing detail, delayed response, or small inconsistency can feel like the beginning of another hidden reality. You may know intellectually that this person is not your ex, but your mind and body are still trying to prevent you from being blindsided again. In this episode, I explain how betrayal trauma follows people into new relationships, how to distinguish fear from genuine warning signs, and how a new partner can offer reassurance without reinforcing constant questioning and hypervigilance. If your past relationship is still controlling how safe you feel today, click below to book a free call and learn what it would take to heal the deeper response, not just manage the symptoms.
When an affair results in a child, the betrayal can no longer be treated as something that simply happened in the past. There may be ongoing contact, financial obligations, custody arrangements, and a permanent reminder of what happened, which often leaves the betrayed partner with choices that may all involve some degree of pain. In this episode, I discuss the difficult questions couples need to face, the boundaries required if reconciliation is going to work, and why the betrayed partner cannot be pressured into accepting a life they never chose. I also explain how the unfaithful partner can take responsibility without abandoning either their existing family or an innocent child. If you're struggling to heal after infidelity and feel trapped by intrusive thoughts, resentment, or an impossible decision, you can book a free call with me to discuss what is keeping you stuck and what it would take to move forward. Everyone's process is unique, but many of my private clients notice a meaningful shift within just a few appointments.
Infidelity doesn't only make you question your partner. It can make you question your memories, your judgment, your future, and even who you are. In this episode, I explain why the endless search for details often fails to provide the certainty you're looking for, and the deeper part of betrayal that has to be addressed for real healing to happen. To speak with me personally about what you're experiencing, feel free to book a free call.
WHEN NO ONE IS WATCHING Gordon Dabbs, PhD Proverbs 10.9 Proverbs 10.9 (ESV) Whoever walks in integrity walks securely, but he who makes his ways crooked will be found out. Character Is What Wisdom Looks Like Over Time Proverbs 22.1 (ESV) A good name is to be chosen rather than great riches, and favor is better than silver or gold. Proverbs 10.9 (ESV) Whoever walks in integrity walks securely, but he who makes his ways crooked will be found out. Your Work has a Spiritual Dimension Proverbs 6.6 (ESV) Go to the ant, O sluggard; consider her ways, and be wise. Colossians 3.17 (ESV) And whatever you do, in word or deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus. . . Integrity Gives You Solid Ground to Stand On Proverbs 11.3 (ESV) The integrity of the upright guides them, but the crookedness of the treacherous destroys them. Proverbs 11.1 (ESV) A false balance is an abomination to the Lord, but a just weight is his delight. The goal of Jesus is not image management. It's inner transformation.Subscribe to PRESTONCREST - with Gordon Dabbs on Soundwise
What kind of person are you when no one is watching? In this message from Proverbs 10:9, Preaching Minister Gordon Dabbs, Ph.D., explores the quiet power of integrity, diligence, and faithfulness. Character is not built in one dramatic moment. It is formed through thousands of ordinary choices: keeping your word, doing honest work, admitting when you are wrong, and showing up even when no one is there to applaud. Through humor, practical wisdom, and the unforgettable story of a young towel seller on Copacabana Beach, we will see that God can use even the most ordinary moments of work and responsibility for purposes far greater than we can imagine. Jesus did not come simply to help us look better. He came to make us whole. “Whoever walks in integrity walks securely.” — Proverbs 10:9Subscribe to PRESTONCREST - with Gordon Dabbs on Soundwise
Both betrayed partners and unfaithful partners can fall into the same trap after infidelity: using every video, post, podcast, and expert opinion they find online to prove the other person is the problem. But if the goal is reconciliation, being right is not the same as healing. In this episode, I talk about the difference between accountability and punishment, why betrayal trauma is real but cannot become a blank check for cruelty, and why remorse does not mean the unfaithful partner has to become completely boundaryless. If you're trying to recover after infidelity and the relationship keeps going in circles, this episode will help you understand what may actually be happening underneath the constant fighting. If you want help healing from betrayal trauma and getting out of the emotional loop, book a free call here:
WHEN NO ONE IS WATCHING Gordon Dabbs, PhD Proverbs 10.9 Proverbs 10.9 (ESV) Whoever walks in integrity walks securely, but he who makes his ways crooked will be found out. Character Is What Wisdom Looks Like Over Time Proverbs 22.1 (ESV) A good name is to be chosen rather than great riches, and favor is better than silver or gold. Proverbs 10.9 (ESV) Whoever walks in integrity walks securely, but he who makes his ways crooked will be found out. Your Work has a Spiritual Dimension Proverbs 6.6 (ESV) Go to the ant, O sluggard; consider her ways, and be wise. Colossians 3.17 (ESV) And whatever you do, in word or deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus. . . Integrity Gives You Solid Ground to Stand On Proverbs 11.3 (ESV) The integrity of the upright guides them, but the crookedness of the treacherous destroys them. Proverbs 11.1 (ESV) A false balance is an abomination to the Lord, but a just weight is his delight. The goal of Jesus is not image management. It's inner transformation.Subscribe to PRESTONCREST - with Gordon Dabbs on Soundwise
DEEPER is a series designed for all ages to grow in God's word! This cover-to-cover study of the Bible, Genesis to Revelation, is a weekly opportunity for the entire family to be encouraged, challenged, and edified.Subscribe to PRESTONCREST - with Gordon Dabbs on Soundwise
Emotional flooding after infidelity can feel like your whole nervous system has been hijacked. In this episode, I talk about what to do in those intense, triggered moments, why trying to “fight” the feeling can sometimes make it worse, and how to stop feeding the mental story that keeps the pain alive. If you're struggling with intrusive thoughts, emotional flooding, or processing the betrayal after infidelity, book a free call with me to see if my one-on-one work is the right fit for your situation.
CIRCLE OF TRUST Gordon Dabbs, PhD Proverbs 13:20 Proverbs 13.20 (ESV) Whoever walks with the wise becomes wise, but the companion of fools will suffer harm. Wisdom is not merely information you collect. Wisdom is a life you learn in relationship with others. Nobody becomes wise alone. Proverbs 27.17 (NLT) As iron sharpens iron, so a friend sharpens a friend. Not every relationship you have deserves the same access to you. 1 Corinthians 15.33 (ESV) Do not be deceived: “Bad company ruins good morals.” Love everyone always. Choose your closest companions carefully. Faithful friends tell the truth. Proverbs 27.6 (ESV) Faithful are the wounds of a friend; profuse are the kisses of an enemy. Proverbs 27.9 (NLT) The heartfelt counsel of a friend is as sweet as perfume and incense. Isolated people have a hard time seeing their own blind spots. Proverbs 17.17 (ESV) A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for adversity. I don't want to just find the right people. . .I want to become the right person that those right people can trust. Proverbs 18.24 (ESV) A man of many companions may come to ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother. Jesus receives us as we are, but He loves us too much to leave us unchanged. The closer we walk with Jesus, the more we become the kind of people others can safely walk with.Subscribe to PRESTONCREST - with Gordon Dabbs on Soundwise
CIRCLE OF TRUST Gordon Dabbs, PhD Proverbs 13:20 Proverbs 13.20 (ESV) Whoever walks with the wise becomes wise, but the companion of fools will suffer harm. Wisdom is not merely information you collect. Wisdom is a life you learn in relationship with others. Nobody becomes wise alone. Proverbs 27.17 (NLT) As iron sharpens iron, so a friend sharpens a friend. Not every relationship you have deserves the same access to you. 1 Corinthians 15.33 (ESV) Do not be deceived: “Bad company ruins good morals.” Love everyone always. Choose your closest companions carefully. Faithful friends tell the truth. Proverbs 27.6 (ESV) Faithful are the wounds of a friend; profuse are the kisses of an enemy. Proverbs 27.9 (NLT) The heartfelt counsel of a friend is as sweet as perfume and incense. Isolated people have a hard time seeing their own blind spots. Proverbs 17.17 (ESV) A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for adversity. I don't want to just find the right people. . .I want to become the right person that those right people can trust. Proverbs 18.24 (ESV) A man of many companions may come to ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother. Jesus receives us as we are, but He loves us too much to leave us unchanged. The closer we walk with Jesus, the more we become the kind of people others can safely walk with.Subscribe to PRESTONCREST - with Gordon Dabbs on Soundwise
After infidelity, it can be tempting to label the unfaithful partner as a narcissist. But the more important question may be less about diagnosis and more about patterns: blame-shifting, minimizing, lack of empathy, and whether you still feel connected to your own reality.
DEEPER is a series designed for all ages to grow in God's word! This cover-to-cover study of the Bible, Genesis to Revelation, is a weekly opportunity for the entire family to be encouraged, challenged, and edified.Subscribe to PRESTONCREST - with Gordon Dabbs on Soundwise
After infidelity, the pain is not just heartbreak. It can feel like a deep violation of fairness, justice, and reality itself. In this episode, I talk about why betrayal can create such a strong need for cosmic justice, the feeling that the person who cheated should suffer, pay, or finally understand what they did. I also explain why staying attached to them in order to punish them often keeps you trapped in your own suffering. This is not about becoming a doormat or pretending what happened was okay. It is about recognizing when the pursuit of justice is costing you your peace, your healing, and your ability to move forward. If you're struggling to process the pain, anger, intrusive thoughts, or emotional chaos after betrayal, you can book a free call to see if this work is the right fit for you.
Why do cheaters sometimes accuse you of cheating before you ever find out what they were doing? In this episode, I'm talking about the confusing and painful dynamic where the person who betrayed you puts you on trial first. Sometimes it's projection. Sometimes it's justification. Sometimes it's manipulation. But either way, their accusation does not mean you caused the betrayal or that you deserved to be treated that way. If you're struggling with intrusive thoughts, confusion, self-doubt, or trying to make sense of what happened after betrayal, you can book a free call with me and we'll look at what's really going on underneath the symptoms.
WORK ON YOUR WORDS Gordon Dabbs, PhD Proverbs 18:21 Proverbs 18.21 (NLT) The tongue can bring death or life; those who love to talk will reap the consequences. WORDS CREATE WORLDS. WORDS ARE SMALL THINGS WITH MASSIVE CONSEQUENCES. Proverbs 12.18 (ESV) There is one whose rash words are like sword thrusts, but the tongue of the wise brings healing. WISDOM IS KNOWING WHEN TO SPEAK AND WHEN TO STOP. Proverbs 17.28 (ESV) Even a fool who keeps silent is considered wise; when he closes his lips, he is deemed intelligent. TONE MATTERS AS MUCH AS WORDS. Proverbs 15.1 (ESV) A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger. Ephesians 4.29 (NLT) Let everything you say be good and helpful, so that your words will be an encouragement to those who hear them. JESUS SHOWS US WHAT LIFE-GIVING WORDS LOOK LIKE. FIVE QUESTIONS BEFORE YOU SPEAK (OR TEXT. . .OR POST): 1. Is it true? 2. Is it necessary? 3. Is it loving? 4. Is this the right time? 5. Am I saying it in the right spirit? Psalm 141.3 (ESV) Set a guard, O Lord, over my mouth; keep watch over the door of my lips!Subscribe to PRESTONCREST - with Gordon Dabbs on Soundwise
After infidelity, it can be hard to tell whether your pain is an old wound being triggered or your intuition warning you that something still isn't safe. In this episode, I talk about how to tell the difference between betrayal trauma, present-day red flags, and the kind of pain that may need boundaries instead of more self-soothing. If you're struggling with intrusive thoughts, suspicion, triggers, or you can't tell whether you're overreacting or accurately noticing something, you can book a free call here:
WORK ON YOUR WORDS Gordon Dabbs, PhD Proverbs 18:21 Proverbs 18.21 (NLT) The tongue can bring death or life; those who love to talk will reap the consequences. WORDS CREATE WORLDS. WORDS ARE SMALL THINGS WITH MASSIVE CONSEQUENCES. Proverbs 12.18 (ESV) There is one whose rash words are like sword thrusts, but the tongue of the wise brings healing. WISDOM IS KNOWING WHEN TO SPEAK AND WHEN TO STOP. Proverbs 17.28 (ESV) Even a fool who keeps silent is considered wise; when he closes his lips, he is deemed intelligent. TONE MATTERS AS MUCH AS WORDS. Proverbs 15.1 (ESV) A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger. Ephesians 4.29 (NLT) Let everything you say be good and helpful, so that your words will be an encouragement to those who hear them. JESUS SHOWS US WHAT LIFE-GIVING WORDS LOOK LIKE. FIVE QUESTIONS BEFORE YOU SPEAK (OR TEXT. . .OR POST): 1. Is it true? 2. Is it necessary? 3. Is it loving? 4. Is this the right time? 5. Am I saying it in the right spirit? Psalm 141.3 (ESV) Set a guard, O Lord, over my mouth; keep watch over the door of my lips!Subscribe to PRESTONCREST - with Gordon Dabbs on Soundwise
Sometimes the pain after infidelity is something that needs to be healed. But sometimes, that pain is trying to warn you that something still isn't safe. In this episode, I talk about the difference between betrayal pain that comes from an old wound and betrayal pain that may be pointing to a present-day problem in the relationship. If you're dealing with intrusive thoughts, shame, hopelessness, loss of confidence, or you can't tell whether your pain is trauma or intuition, you can book a free call here: https://www.jordanapodaca.com/ --------------------------------------------------------------------- JJA Consulting LLC • Fully insured through Alternative Balance LLC • Based in Michigan • Appointments via Zoom • Confidential and results-based. Disclaimer Jordan Apodaca is not a licensed therapist, counselor, or medical professional. His services are for educational and coaching purposes only and are not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any mental or medical condition. Individual results vary. If you are in crisis or need clinical support, please reach out to a licensed mental-health provider or emergency services. We do not claim to treat or cure PTSD, depression, anxiety disorders, or any medical or psychological condition. If you are experiencing suicidal thoughts or are in crisis, please contact 988 or local emergency services. Coaching is not appropriate for crisis support. Summary of Terms and Conditions Educational Purpose Only: Coaching and hypnosis appointments are for personal development and educational purposes only. Not Therapy or Medical Treatment: These services are not a substitute for counseling, psychotherapy, psychiatric, or medical care. Results Vary: Individual results vary depending on many factors. No specific outcome is guaranteed. Your Responsibility: You are responsible for your participation, decisions, and well-being before, during, and after appointments. You agree to remain coachable and follow the Practitioner's lead regarding appointment spacing. No Refunds: All sales are final except as required by law. We commit to working with you until the specific result is achieved, provided you remain committed to the process. Confidentiality: All private appointments are confidential except where disclosure is required by law. Intellectual Property: All appointment materials and methods are owned by JJA Consulting LLC and may not be shared or reproduced. Code of Conduct: We reserve the right to refuse or end services for disruptive, abusive, or unsafe behavior. Results-Based Model: You are purchasing a result, not a time-based subscription. We do not offer weekly check-in calls or "venting" consultations. We meet only when necessary to achieve the specific result. By scheduling or purchasing services, you agree to the full Terms and Conditions. You further agree that reasonable updates to these Terms to clarify the spirit of the agreement may apply to our engagement. https://www.jordanapodaca.com/#terms Subscribe to The Infidelity Recovery Podcast on Soundwise
Subscribe to PRESTONCREST - with Gordon Dabbs on Soundwise
Subscribe to PRESTONCREST - with Gordon Dabbs on Soundwise
https://www.jordanapodaca.com/ What do you do when your partner cheated, but now they are the one drowning in shame? In this episode, I talk about the complicated dynamic that happens when the unfaithful partner feels ashamed of what they did, but that shame starts taking over every conversation. Shame may be real, and it may even be part of what needs to be healed. But it cannot become a way to avoid accountability, collapse emotionally, or make the betrayed partner responsible for comforting the person who hurt them. I'll break down the difference between genuine shame that can lead to growth and shame that becomes another form of avoidance. I'll also explain why the betrayed partner's pain and the betrayer's shame need separate spaces if repair is going to happen. If you're trying to recover from infidelity and you feel stuck in the same painful emotional loops, you can book a free call with me. We'll look at what's actually keeping you stuck and whether working together would be the right fit.
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BEING MY OWN GPS Gordon Dabbs, PhD Proverbs 3.5-8 Proverbs 3.5-8 (NLT) Trust in the Lord with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding. Seek his will in all you do, and he will show you which path to take. Don't be impressed with your own wisdom. Instead, fear the Lord and turn away from evil. Then you will have healing for your body and strength for your bones. WE OFTEN WANT GOD'S WILL ON OUR TERMS. We want God to show us the map while leaving us in control of the steering wheel. The goal is not merely knowing God's will. The goal is knowing God. The Christian life is not primarily about getting information from God. It is about becoming the kind of person who walks with God. TRUST IS MORE THAN BELIEF. John 4.24 (ESV) God is spirit, and those who worship him must worship in spirit and truth. Proverbs 14.12 (ESV) There is a way that seems right to a man, but its end is the way to death. GOD DIRECTS THOSE WILLING TO BE DIRECTED. Proverbs 3.6 (ESV) In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths. Proverbs 16.1-3 (NLT) We can make our own plans, but the Lord gives the right answer. People may be pure in their own eyes, but the Lord examines their motives. Commit your actions to the Lord, and your plans will succeed. The heart of man plans his way, but the Lord establishes his steps. James 4.13-15 (ESV) Come now, you who say, “Today or tomorrow we will go into such and such a town and spend a year there and trade and make a profit”— yet you do not know what tomorrow will bring. What is your life? For you are a mist that appears for a little time and then vanishes. Instead you ought to say, “If the Lord wills, we will live and do this or that.” HOW DO WISE PEOPLE MAKE DECISIONS? 1. Have I prayed about it? 2. What does Scripture say? 3. Have I sought wise counsel? 4. What are my motives? 5. Am I willing to obey whatever God reveals?Subscribe to PRESTONCREST - with Gordon Dabbs on Soundwise
BEING MY OWN GPS Gordon Dabbs, PhD Proverbs 3.5-8 Proverbs 3.5-8 (NLT) Trust in the Lord with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding. Seek his will in all you do, and he will show you which path to take. Don't be impressed with your own wisdom. Instead, fear the Lord and turn away from evil. Then you will have healing for your body and strength for your bones. WE OFTEN WANT GOD'S WILL ON OUR TERMS. We want God to show us the map while leaving us in control of the steering wheel. The goal is not merely knowing God's will. The goal is knowing God. The Christian life is not primarily about getting information from God. It is about becoming the kind of person who walks with God. TRUST IS MORE THAN BELIEF. John 4.24 (ESV) God is spirit, and those who worship him must worship in spirit and truth. Proverbs 14.12 (ESV) There is a way that seems right to a man, but its end is the way to death. GOD DIRECTS THOSE WILLING TO BE DIRECTED. Proverbs 3.6 (ESV) In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths. Proverbs 16.1-3 (NLT) We can make our own plans, but the Lord gives the right answer. People may be pure in their own eyes, but the Lord examines their motives. Commit your actions to the Lord, and your plans will succeed. The heart of man plans his way, but the Lord establishes his steps. James 4.13-15 (ESV) Come now, you who say, “Today or tomorrow we will go into such and such a town and spend a year there and trade and make a profit”— yet you do not know what tomorrow will bring. What is your life? For you are a mist that appears for a little time and then vanishes. Instead you ought to say, “If the Lord wills, we will live and do this or that.” HOW DO WISE PEOPLE MAKE DECISIONS? 1. Have I prayed about it? 2. What does Scripture say? 3. Have I sought wise counsel? 4. What are my motives? 5. Am I willing to obey whatever God reveals?Subscribe to PRESTONCREST - with Gordon Dabbs on Soundwise
You can't erase the betrayal. You can't undo what happened. And you can't force yourself to forget the fact that someone you loved broke your trust. But that doesn't mean the betrayal has to define the rest of your life. In this episode, I talk about the idea of “include and transcend” and how it applies to infidelity recovery. Healing after being cheated on is not about pretending it never happened, suppressing the pain, or trying to go back to who you were before. It's about reaching a point where the betrayal is included as part of your story, but it no longer becomes the lens through which you see yourself, your relationship, your past, or your future. We'll also talk about one of the hardest parts of betrayal trauma: holding conflicting truths at the same time. Maybe there was love and betrayal. Maybe parts of the relationship were real, and parts were deeply distorted. Maybe this chapter changed you, but it doesn't have to become your whole identity. If you're struggling to move forward after infidelity, and you feel like the betrayal has taken over your mind, your emotions, or your sense of self, you can book a free strategy call with me to talk about what it would look like to finally move past this at the deeper level.