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257. Mother Daughter Relationship During Teen Years and Beyond with Sandra Stanley and Allie Stanley Cooney "Love never fails." 1 Corinthians 13:8a NIV **Transcription Below** Sandra Stanley received her Bachelor of Science degree from Georgia Tech and Master of Arts from Dallas Theological Seminary. Sandra has a heart for foster kids and foster families, as she and Andy have been foster parents since 2010. Her ministry passion is promoting foster care in the local church. Much of her time these days is spent working on various writing projects and continuing her involvement with Fostering Together, the foster care initiative of North Point Ministries. Connect with her online: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/sandrawstanley Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/sandra.w.stanley/ X: https://twitter.com/sandrawstanley Website: https://www.sandrastanley.com/ Allie Stanley Cooney graduated from Auburn University with a degree in Communication. She completed the North Point Residency program and simultaneously earned a Masters of Christian Education degree from Dallas Theological Seminary. With a decade of experience guiding students along their spiritual journeys, Allie is passionate about empowering middle school, high school and college students to embrace a life devoted to following Jesus wholeheartedly. She has a heart for middle school and high school students and can often be spotted at any number of local coffee shops pouring into girls in those seasons of life. Connect with her on socials: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/alliekaycooney X: https://twitter.com/alliekaystanley Questions and Topics We Cover: How can understanding the three potential relationship stages help these daughters navigate relationships with friends and with boys? When we coach our daughters through developing friendships, what questions do you suggest we ask for clarification and what Scripture do you share for understanding our responsibility within friendships? I love how you both emphasize alone time with Jesus. How can we learn and apply this? Other Episodes Mentioned from The Savvy Sauce: 200 Planting Seeds of Faith in Our Children with Courtney DeFeo 196 Parenting for the Relationship with Sandra Stanley Related Episodes on The Savvy Sauce: Parenting the Prodigal Child And God's Desire For Redemption With Mother-Daughter Duo, Claire Stanfill and Tindell Baldwin Effective Parenting for Toddlers Through College with Wife, Mother to 8, and The Exchange Founder, Elizabeth Pehrson Intentional Questions to Ask Our Kids with Susan Seay 207 Cultivating Character in Our Children with Cynthia Yanof 212 School Series: Benefits of Homeschooling with Jodi Mockabee 217 Tween/Teen Females: How to Navigate Changes during Puberty with Dr. Jennifer Degler 220 Cultivating Healthy Family Relationships with Dr. Gary Chapman Thank You to Our Sponsor: Leman Property Management Company Connect with The Savvy Sauce on Facebook or Instagram or Our Website Please help us out by sharing this episode with a friend, leaving a 5-star rating and review on Apple Podcasts, and subscribing to this podcast! Gospel Scripture: (all NIV) Romans 3:23 “for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God,” Romans 3:24 “and are justified freely by his grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus.” Romans 3:25 (a) “God presented him as a sacrifice of atonement, through faith in his blood.” Hebrews 9:22 (b) “without the shedding of blood there is no forgiveness.” Romans 5:8 “But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” Romans 5:11 “Not only is this so, but we also rejoice in God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have now received reconciliation.” John 3:16 “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.” Romans 10:9 “That if you confess with your mouth, “Jesus is Lord,” and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved.” Luke 15:10 says “In the same way, I tell you, there is rejoicing in the presence of the angels of God over one sinner who repents.” Romans 8:1 “Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus” Ephesians 1:13–14 “And you also were included in Christ when you heard the word of truth, the gospel of your salvation. Having believed, you were marked in him with a seal, the promised Holy Spirit, who is a deposit guaranteeing our inheritance until the redemption of those who are God's possession- to the praise of his glory.” Ephesians 1:15–23 “For this reason, ever since I heard about your faith in the Lord Jesus and your love for all the saints, I have not stopped giving thanks for you, remembering you in my prayers. I keep asking that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the glorious Father, may give you the spirit of wisdom and revelation, so that you may know him better. I pray also that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you, the riches of his glorious inheritance in the saints, and his incomparably great power for us who believe. That power is like the working of his mighty strength, which he exerted in Christ when he raised him from the dead and seated him at his right hand in the heavenly realms, far above all rule and authority, power and dominion, and every title that can be given, not only in the present age but also in the one to come. And God placed all things under his feet and appointed him to be head over everything for the church, which is his body, the fullness of him who fills everything in every way.” Ephesians 2:8–10 “For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith – and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God – not by works, so that no one can boast. For we are God‘s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.“ Ephesians 2:13 “But now in Christ Jesus you who once were far away have been brought near through the blood of Christ.“ Philippians 1:6 “being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.” **Transcription** Music: (0:00 – 0:08) Laura Dugger: (0:09 - 1:46) Welcome to The Savvy Sauce, where we have practical chats for intentional living. I'm your host, Laura Duggar, and I'm so glad you're here. Leman Property Management Co. has the apartment you will be able to call home, with over 1,700 apartment units available in Central Illinois. Visit them today at lemanproperties.com or connect with them on Facebook. I am so excited to get to host these guests, Sandra Stanley and her daughter, Allie Stanley Cooney. They have co-authored this amazing book entitled, Meet Me in the Middle, and throughout it I just loved their sense of humor. I appreciated their witty comments that had me laughing in the middle of their stories, but I also appreciate the practicality this book has to offer. If you think back, Courtney DeFeo was a previous guest and we discussed the treasured Bible study, which is a great thing for mothers to walk through with their tween daughters, maybe girls of approximately ages 10 to 12, so I'll make sure and link that episode in the show notes, but today's book that we're kind of emphasizing is really good as that next step to highlight perhaps with your junior high or high school daughter. It's a beautiful book because you get really both real perspectives of the mother and the daughter from two drastically different angles, and that's kind of what our conversation is gonna look like today as I get to interview mother-daughter duo, Sandra and Allie. Here's our chat. Welcome to The Savvy Sauce, Sandra and Allie. Sandra Stanley: (1:59 - 2:03) Thank you for having us. Allie Stanley Cooney: Thank you for having us. We're excited to be here. Sandra Stanley: We really are. Laura Dugger: (2:04 - 2:13) Well, I would love for us to just begin with the two of you sharing some of the hardest and sweetest phases that you've walked through in your own mother-daughter relationship. Sandra Stanley: (2:14 - 4:00) Okay, well, let's see. Allie, this is funny and this kind of weaves through probably every question, but we are wired very differently from each other, and I am more analytical, efficient, organized, you know, all that. Allie is so creative and just spontaneous, and she is the best content creator and all of that kind of stuff, and I obsess over the details of did I capitalize everything and spell everything, and so while that has been amazing in this project working together because we kind of, you know, can just sort of coach each other along in our strengths, there were some times along the way in when she was growing up that that would just naturally cause some clashes, and that is mostly on me because I have a hard time understanding why efficiency didn't make it to the fruits of the spirit list, and you know, in parenting, efficiency is not the goal. The relationship is the goal, and I would switch those sometimes and err on the side of trying to be efficient, so often when we had those difficult times, it was on me, not her, because of all that kind of stuff, so the sweetest part, though, is she has always inspired me. Even when she was a kid, she just had a maturity and a desire to have an intimate relationship with the Lord from an early, early age, and I think she just challenged Andy and me both in our just our personal walks with the Lord and authenticity and a bunch of things like that, so it's been a sweet relationship, and we pretty much talk all day long. Allie Stanley Cooney: (4:00 - 4:34) Yeah, I was gonna say the sweetest season, I think, is definitely this one because I had a baby girl about two years ago, and I remember holding my baby girl for the first, second, third time, whatever, and just like, I love her so much, I'm so overwhelmed, and then looking at my mom and being like, wait a minute, you've loved me this much this whole time? Like, that's crazy. So I think getting to be a mom and doing this project together and all the things, I think this season has been definitely one of the sweetest for sure. Laura Dugger: (4:34 - 5:07) I think that's very encouraging to anybody raising children in their home, but with your book, there were so many topics for mothers and daughters, but I'd love to first focus on this one section that you title, Finding Your People, and it's where you're talking about relationships, especially with friends and with boys, and so Allie, how can understanding the three potential relationship stages help these daughters navigate relationships with friends and with boys? Allie Stanley Cooney: (5:08 - 7:43) Yeah, definitely, so how our book is laid out, a little bit of context, my mom wrote the first eight chapters to the moms, and then I wrote the back eight chapters to the girls, and we go through these different topics, and one of the topics, like you said, is friends and boys, so when I was thinking about that chapter, there's some, I feel like when you're in middle school, when you're in high school, friends and boys, that's what you're thinking about, that's what you care about, that's what probably you want to read about if you're gonna have to read something, so I wanted to break this down in a way that it's not natural for, you know, middle schoolers and high schoolers to think about, so we break down the three, the three potential stages, stages, that's what I'm looking for, we break down the three stages and let them know that in each stage of a potential relationship, you're called to love, and so the first stage is just before you enter into this relationship, or before you become really close friends, when you're kind of thinking through, is this something I want, is this something that will be good for you, asking the questions like, does this person make me more like Jesus, is this person a good influence, will this person help my life be better, or will it ultimately make it worse, and what does it look like to navigate that season really well, and then the next season is when you're in the relationship, and how can you love that person well while also honoring yourself and honoring that person, and then the last one I think is my favorite, because I think we forget about it potentially, and obviously a lot of our relationships, my best friend that I met in middle school is still one of my very best friends, but a lot of relationships that you have in middle school and in high school, they tend to go away, so there is a stage that is after the relationship, whether that's a breakup, or you just kind of drift apart, whatever that looks like, and the reminder that we're still called to love, because I know culture especially is like, breakup, you should just say horrible things about them, and trash them, and if anybody's friends with them, then you can't be friends with them, and I think the reality is, no, even when the relationship is over, you're still called to love them, and that doesn't mean you need to be with them, or anything like that, but it does mean being kind about them, being thoughtful, being gentle, even when you're no longer in that relationship, so I think that's something that students don't really think about, once the relationship is over, it's like moving on, yeah, you're not called to anything anymore, so yeah. Laura Dugger: (7:44 - 8:13) I love it, and you really highlight the scripture in 1 Corinthians 13, and so even though your lessons there were directed at daughters, there's something for each of us to learn for relationships, and Sandra, I'd love to hear from your side too, when we're coaching our daughters through developing friendships, what questions do you suggest we ask for clarification, and what scripture do you share for understanding our responsibility within friendships? Sandra Stanley: (8:14 - 10:28) Yes, great question. Well, and Allie talked about the structure of the book a little bit, you know, that we have eight topics. I write eight to the mom's. She writes eight to the girls, in the middle is the meet me in the middle section, where they come together, and where they can have these conversations, so that's the time when maybe we are talking about, okay, what is a good friend, you know, what does a good friend look like, what are some characteristics of someone that you want to be friends with, and that you want to see every day, and do life together with, what are those characteristics, what makes a lifelong friend, you know, what's the difference between a short-term friend and a long-term friend, what causes friendships to be short-term, you know, what are the things that can cause one to end, and another big question that we talk about is, do you, and do I, and this all applies to us too, not just to the girls, so when we're doing this meet me in the middle section, and having these conversations, this is a two-way conversation, and I think as moms, it's so important for us to be, you know, authentic, and to dive in and say, yeah, I kind of still struggle with this too, but do I want to become more like this potential friend, that's a big question, is there, you know, is this a person that I want to be like, because scripture is clear in Ephesians 5, “He who walks with the wise becomes wise, and companion of fools suffers harm.” That's an important thing to talk about with our kids. You are going to become more like the people that you spend time with. Another question is: Is this somebody I want to introduce my mom and dad to? I remember there were talking with our middle son years, you know, after college, after he was already married. He said, you know, I always knew, this is not a person for me, if I knew it wasn't someone that I would want to bring home and introduce to you and dad, or to Allie. You know, is this somebody that I want Allie to be friends with for the next bunch of decades, so you know, is this somebody I want to introduce my family to, and so we do take a deep dive into 1 Corinthians 13, the love chapter, Allie asked the girls to circle the characteristics of love, I asked the moms, hey, play along, circle the characteristics of love, let's talk about what it really looks like to love, and let's talk about what it really looks like to have friends who are lovely, and who we want to spend more time with. Laura Dugger: (10:29 - 10:58) There's so much wisdom in that, and then I think one of your secret sauces, just as a family in general, is your practical teaching, and so if we're taking this even further, let's dive in, it's between pages 64 and 65, but there are a few quotes that I'd love for you to unpack, and one of the first ones is, don't trade what you want most for what you want in the moment. Sandra Stanley: (10:59 - 11:01) Right, right, do you want to talk about that? Allie Stanley Cooney: (11:01 - 11:43) Yeah, so I think it's really easy, especially when you're in middle school and high school, and you want to be popular, and you don't want to be left out, and you might want to have a boyfriend, and the reality is, if you just zoom back a little bit, you know, it's like, okay, what do you ultimately want? You ultimately want a healthy family, you ultimately want things in the future, and unfortunately, in middle school and high school, there are certain decisions that you can make that can ultimately compromise what you ultimately want, and so I think having that wisdom and that forethought of, why don't you even think about what you want? Like, have you ever sat down and thought about what you want in your future? Let's do that together, and then back it up from there, and then see if you're making decisions that will lead to that. Sandra Stanley: (11:44 - 12:55) Yeah, I think so, and the good thing about the book is moms can contextualize some of this to the age of their daughters, so if it's an older daughter, and she's in a relationship where, you know, there's likely to be some struggle with, you know, how far do I go physically, you know, what are my standards going to be, is all that, to relate to all that, this particular quote is such an important thing to talk about. Don't trade what you want most for what you might want in the moment, and that speaks, you know, really loudly to a physical relationship, and one of the good things about doing this meet-me-in-the-middle-with-a-daughter is you can have these conversations ahead of time, before there's a face, you know, that we're talking about, or a particular boyfriend or friendship. We can have these conversations early, and then when these things come, we can go back and go, hey, remember what we talked about, about don't trade what you want most for what you want in the moment? Let's just, I want you to go on this date, but I want you to remember that, you know, the decisions that you're gonna make now, they're gonna impact what your future is gonna be like, and the story that you're gonna tell, so that was, that was just kind of what we were, had in our minds as we talked about, don't trade what you want most for what you want in the moment. Laura Dugger: (12:55 - 13:06) Well, then you follow it up with, don't let your future be negatively influenced by people who won't even be in your future, and I think that kind of... Allie Stanley Cooney: (13:07 - 13:41) I remember that clicking when I was in high school. I remember, I was dating a guy, and I was like, no, I don't want to marry him, like, no, like, that'd be crazy. What? And then I'm like, why am I dating him? Like, yeah, I don't want anything, I don't want my friendships impacted, like, I don't want to push my friendships away because I'm spending more time with him. Like there's so many things other than just physical boundaries, which obviously that's a huge one too. But even aside from that, people who aren't going to be in your life long-term do have the potential to affect your future. So I think that's a really important one too. Sandra Stanley: (13:41 - 14:28) And affect the relationships that you want to carry into your future. Your good friends, you know, the people that you want to spend time with. So that's a really important one, I think. And these are great conversation topics. You know, even if you write it on a card and hand it to your daughter and say, hey, let's talk about what this looks like. Don't let your future be negatively influenced by people who won't even be in your future. And this is where the mom in the conversation that they're having in the meet me in the middle section can talk about a relationship that she can remember having that she thought was going to be forever. And it was, you know, seven months of her life. And then it was over. So having those opportunities to have these conversations with our girls is so important. And these two particular quotes are really important to talk about ahead of time. Laura Dugger: (14:29 - 14:52) Certainly. And it just circles back to even Allie, those three things that you were talking about earlier, those three stages, your conclusion in that section is love never fails. And so if we actually are loving in the way the list of first Corinthians 13 love list, then that is hopefully going to set our daughters and us as mothers up for success. Sandra Stanley: (14:52 - 14:53) Absolutely. Laura Dugger: (14:54 - 16:57) Let's take a quick break to hear a message from our sponsor. With over 1,700 apartment units available throughout Pekin, Peoria, Peoria Heights, Morton, Washington, and Canton. And with every price range covered, you will have plenty of options when you rent through Leman Property Management Co. They have townhomes, duplexes, studios, and garden style options located in many areas throughout Pekin. In Peoria, a historic downtown location and apartments adjacent to the OSF Medical Center provide excellent choices. 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Check them out on Facebook today or email their friendly staff at leasing@LemanProps.com. You can also stop by their website at lemanproperties.com. That's L-E-M-A-N properties.com. Check them out and find your place to call home today. And Sandra, would you mind just setting the scene, take us back to that day that you walked into your sweet daughter's messy room? Sandra Stanley: (16:59 - 19:08) Which time? So, this is so funny, and it goes back to how we're wired so differently. I have a place for everything and everything has its place, and I clean up as I go, and all of that kind of stuff, and my sweet, creative daughter just operates differently. But that manifests itself in a messy room, which really wasn't okay. And growing up, obviously, we want to teach our children just good habits and being tidy and all the things that are gonna serve them well later. So there was one particular day, she was at school, and I had been in her room doing something and realized, wow, this is kind of off the chart messy. And so when she gets home, we're gonna have to have a conversation about this whole thing. So fast forward, we get to the afternoon, Allie's upstairs, and I know she's up there in her room, so this will be a good time. And I wasn't always the best at picking my approach or my timing, but I did work on it. So by the time she was in high school, I think I was better maybe at that. She might not think so. But anyway, so anyway, so I walk in her room and I look, and she's sitting on the floor, just furiously typing. And she goes, mom, before I can even say anything, mom, my girls are going into high school, I'm getting ready to leave to go to college, and there's just some things I need them to know. So I'm writing Allie's rules for high school. And she said, let me read them to you. So she starts reading this list. And with every single one, my heart just started, I mean, I just started melting into the messy floor with her because I thought this is so much more important. If I were to describe the bullseye on the target in parenting, it would have nothing to do with the clean room. It would have everything to do with the character of her heart. And as she was writing and reading me these rules, I thought this is Allie's heart on display. And it just kind of was a life changing moment for me. And then I asked her if I could put it on my blog. I was actively blogging at the time. And she's like, sure, nobody will see it. So you can put it on your blog. Allie Stanley Cooney: (19:09 - 19:09) Cute little blog. Sandra Stanley: (19:09 - 19:37) And as it turned out, it went viral and was all over the place and radio shows in the mornings and all that. On the first day of school, back to school in Fulton County in Atlanta, there was the Burt Show, I think it's still show, Burt Show, a radio show, drive time show. And he was reading them, reading them off. And everybody in his studio was all commenting on each one of them. So as all of Fulton County is driving to school, Allie's rules for high school were being read to them. Laura Dugger: (19:38 - 19:45) Wow. I mean, I guess knowing the list, it doesn't surprise me that it would go viral. Allie Stanley Cooney: (19:46 - 19:48) And I- Surprised me, for sure, yeah. Laura Dugger: (19:49 - 19:59) Well, I envision mothers and daughters even listening to this conversation together. I do wonder if my daughters would love to pause and go back and say, remember, mark of good parenting is not a clean room. Sandra Stanley: (20:00 - 20:03) So- Right, they're gonna bookmark that statement, yeah. Laura Dugger: (20:04 - 20:10) I was guilty of that too, growing up. But Allie, would you be willing to share some of those rules with us? Allie Stanley Cooney: (20:10 - 21:44) Yeah, no, I'd love to. Well, I will say, so I was going into high school as the small group girls that I was leading. No, no, sorry, I was going into college while the small group girls I was leading were going into high school. And there was just a lot of things I wanted them to know and to remember and things we had talked about and things that maybe I had learned the hard way or watched my friends learn the hard way. So I will say, hearing them go, like I didn't write them for everybody to hear them. You didn't write them for a universal audience. No, I think I would have written them differently, but it's sweet now and I'm glad. So I'll just read a couple. I won't do all of them because there's 20 in the book. But one, surround yourself with people who build you up, not with people who tear you down. Have an accountability partner and be willing to tell her everything. Emphasis on her. Yep, be so, so, so, so, so, so careful about who you date. This one's my favorite. I don't know why, I just, I really, this one hits home. If you're wondering if you should break up with him, break up with him. That's the one I learned the hard way. Yep. Pray, pray, pray. Don't ever forget how much you need God. Have a quiet time. It may seem like a hassle, but it will help you stay close to God. Be nice to your parents. They love you and want what's best for you. So if you disagree with them, just remember that they're a lot smarter than you. Sorry about that. Never be afraid to say no. When you fall on your face, get back up. There's a bunch more, but the last one is one of my favorites and it's selfies are for faces. That sounds like a good one. Sandra Stanley: (21:44 - 21:49) That was such an insightful one just for girls to hear. Silly. You know, you do a face, a face. Allie Stanley Cooney: (21:49 - 21:52) I mean, it was mostly like an inside joke. Sandra Stanley: (21:52 - 22:03) So there were several that were inside jokes for them, which didn't make fun and didn't make a lot of sense on the radio to drive time in Fulton County, but they made it all funny and fun. Allie Stanley Cooney: (22:03 - 22:05) So that's a couple of them. Laura Dugger: (22:05 - 22:17) I actually thought that was one of my favorites as well. It was put in a succinct way. And at that time, you were just a few years ahead of them. And so hearing that from you lands differently than hearing that from mom. Allie Stanley Cooney: (22:18 - 22:18) Yeah. Laura Dugger: (22:19 - 22:35) But Allie, you're kind of explaining, it was one of those decisions, if you reverse back a little bit, can you share, you write that it was one of the best decisions to grow your faith. And it's something pretty replicable that I'm hoping others will grasp onto as well. Allie Stanley Cooney: (22:35 - 23:12) No, and that was, if I'm remembering correctly, what I wrote in there, there's a couple of things, but deciding to be a middle school small group leader when I was in high school was probably the best decision I made for my faith because it caused me to take it really seriously. It made me realize, oh, the decisions I make aren't just going to affect me, it's actually now gonna affect these girls. I remember having a moment where I realized, okay, I don't wanna make any decision where I'm gonna be tempted to lie to these girls about it. Cause you know, middle school girls, they asked me everything. Sandra Stanley: (23:13 - 23:13) No boundaries. Allie Stanley Cooney: (23:13 - 23:46) And they were all in my business. And so realizing like, okay, I don't wanna make a decision where if they ask me, which they will, I don't want to be tempted to lie to them. So what did those decisions look like? What would I be proud to tell them? And ultimately what decisions do I want them to make when they're in high school? So it not only drew me a lot closer to Jesus, cause they also would ask me theological questions and like faith questions. And I was like, I don't know, let me dive in. But also it was a really cool accountability that I really loved having in high school. Sandra Stanley: (23:47 - 24:21) This is really one of the things that we've done for a long time in our church. And that is allow our high school students to partner with an adult to lead these small groups. And it just has, it has impacted all three of our kids in their faith journey. And again, to Allie's point, a big part of it is accountability. Like, oh my goodness, I don't want my girls or my guys to, I don't wanna do something that's gonna cause me to either have to lie or that would be disappointing to them. And so I think it was a, I think it's a great part of the program, yeah. But so volunteering, always huge. Laura Dugger: (24:22 - 24:32) Agreed. And to get our students into ministry where they get to experience leadership early on, I think that's so profoundly impactful for faith. Sandra Stanley: (24:32 - 24:33) That's exactly right, yes. Laura Dugger: (24:34 - 24:59) Well, and something else that both of you emphasize, which I especially appreciated, was spending alone time with Jesus. And Allie, you were saying that we have to incorporate foundational beliefs and practices into our lives, specifically through two steps, learning and applying. So, will you elaborate on both of those parts? Allie Stanley Cooney: (25:00 - 26:11) Yeah, so I, yeah, I mean, that's how we grow our faith. We can't have a faith if we don't know anything, and then we can't really have a faith if we're not putting what we know into practice. So, the learning really just looks like reading your Bible. You know, it looks like it's those really obvious, quote unquote, steps. If you go to church, you've listened to the message and you take in the information about Jesus and about scripture and about God and about who you are and about who people are, and that's you're learning. You have to learn, you have to take in the information. And then the second one is when you put it into practice, you know, you actually live out what scripture says, you live out what you're learning in church, you love the people around you well, you root yourself and establish yourself in the love of Jesus and who he says you are, and you walk in your identity. So, it's so multifaceted and there's a lot to it, but ultimately, if you can break it down and tell the girls, hey, we learn, and then we take what we learn and we do it, and that's how you grow your faith. And even when it gets hard, you keep going. And even when people push back, you keep doing it, you keep learning, and you keep applying. And ultimately, that's how your faith grows. Sandra Stanley: (26:12 - 26:20) And that is how a Jesus follower consistently follows Jesus. So, it's such an important thing. Yeah, absolutely. Laura Dugger: (26:21 - 26:52) Well, and even one example of that, you first of all say, keep continually putting truth in front of you, but then you go a step further and you say, well, even before that, spend a little bit of time thinking about the best way to keep truth in front of you. And you challenge readers to consider the routines and rhythms of their normal day and see where they can put important truths in. So, do either of you have an example of how you do that in your own life? Allie Stanley Cooney: (26:53 - 27:54) Yeah, and it's looked really different throughout my life. And I think I wanna give permission to these girls that it's okay if it looks different than somebody else, because we learn and we feel close to our heavenly father in different ways than everybody else and in different seasons of life. So, I remember when I was in middle school, I had a devotional, and it was very story-based. It was like made up stories, but it had something to learn at the end of it. It had a moral and it was always Jesus-centered, and it was always about simple things like generosity and gratitude. And reading stories for me was how I connected with God. And then as I got older, I started reading scripture for myself and I'm a huge journaler. So now my time looks a lot like reading scripture and journaling and then journaling some more and then reading scripture. And that's kind of where I find my time with the Lord. Yeah, but it's definitely changed over time. Sandra Stanley: (27:54 - 31:31) I would say that mine has changed in different seasons of life too. When you're single and you've got lots of flexibility and time, it really looked one way for me. It was morning and it was longer and all of that. In the parenting seasons, it looked different throughout that journey when the little ones, I would try to get up before them and try to get my quiet time in, but it really did. It ebbed and flowed in the amount of time I was able to spend and all of that. In this season, I have more time. And for me, it's always been better in the morning. I know some people are better at night and that's fine. For me, it's been morning, and I just have to have my space, my particular place that I go with all my quiet time materials there. And when I'm there, it just, the distractions are minimal. And that's because that's just my place to be alone with my heavenly father. I've got a little spot to pray and a spot to sit and read and study. And so that's what it looks like for me. I am so often asked by moms; do we make our kids have a quiet time? Do I make my middle school son or my middle school daughter or high school daughter have a quiet time? And I always say, no, you don't need to make them do it. But I suggest three things. You model it, you encourage it, and you make it easy. You model it, you encourage it and make it easy. So, I, my kids saw me and Andy having quiet times their whole childhood. And again, it looked different, different seasons, but they knew that we both spent time in the word and in prayer. And that just modeled it for them. So, it was something that they just grew up kind of assuming is a given, which is a good thing, but you can also encourage it. And that's one of the things that we did was we just helped them as they got older, figure out what does this look like for you? You know, what kind of, are you a morning person? Are you an evening person? Is this gonna be, you know, just helping them figure out best times and best practices and all that for their personality and temperaments. And then making it easy. We always made sure our kids had age-appropriate Bibles in every season, starting when they couldn't even read little picture Bibles that were their own. We wanted them to have their own Bible and never remember a time that they didn't have their own. And so we just made sure that, you know, different seasons of their lives, they had age appropriate Bibles. And one of the things that I did, and this is just a kind of a, maybe a little fun thing, their Easter baskets every year, while, you know, it always had some chocolate bunnies, you know, and all the normal Easter basket things, I always made sure that there were quiet time tools in their Easter basket that were age appropriate and, you know, proclivity appropriate based on what they liked. And, you know, one of our sons was a reader, one wasn't so much a reader, but if it was about an athlete and the athlete's testimony, they would both read that. So, I would put all kinds of different things for Allie, journaling stuff, pens, colored pencils, just anything that I thought would encourage their journey in a quiet time. That was my big time to do that. And then of course, other times of the year, we would add some things, but model it, encourage it, make it easy. And that's the best way to set your kids up to maybe make this as a habit. And even when they don't, nagging isn't gonna help, so don't nag, you know, don't nag under the guise of I'm just reminding them, but model it, encourage it in the appropriate ways and then make it easy. Laura Dugger: (31:31 - 31:48) And I even thought there was additional practical wisdom that you shared within that section, just encouraging the mamas, guard your time. And how do you see that intentionality tying over into our time with the Lord? Sandra Stanley: (31:48 - 34:00) Definitely it ties over. I think, you know, as we think about motherhood and Allie is experiencing this now, there's a whole other layer of busyness that gets added to your life. It's almost like the things on your calendar double. And then as they get older, it's even more and more intense as they get older, because everybody, you know, has jobs. So, in this season with these moms of middle school and high school girls, they might be having their first little jobs or and your other kids also. So anyway, it's just a busy season and our time is limited. So, we always say, Andy and I say this all the time to parents, your time is limited. So, you've got to limit what you do with your time. And when you make it a priority to have that time alone with your heavenly father, that's one of your biggest yeses. And then they're just going to be some no's in different seasons. I call them categorical no's in different seasons of parenting. When the kids were little, I had all these categories of things that are just a no for now. This might be a yes for later. It's a no for now. So, things like I'm doing now, like writing projects or speaking, or, you know, just stuff like that were no's when my kids were young, because those are so time consuming. And so those were no for now, but not forever categories of things. So, I would say to moms and to daughters, you know, your time is limited. So, you've got to limit it. And so, you know, pay attention to what the most important things are. And I would say, go so far as to say calendar those things, put those things on your calendar and treat them like appointments. Because typically the mom is the calendar keeper for the whole family. And what we put on our calendars, what we actually do. And so I've always used my calendar that way to make sure that the most important things are on the calendar, even little things like call my grandmother, you know, back during those seasons, because I would get busy and, you know, two weeks would go by and, you know, I knew my time with her was limited. So just even little things like that I've always calendared. And I think our quiet time may be something we need to calendar and give it a time slot. And, you know, for me, again, I'm the efficiency person. So that just works for me. That doesn't necessarily mean that's for everybody, but it works for me. Laura Dugger: (34:00 - 34:23) I think that's so good, Sandra. Thank you for sharing. And the two of you wrote about a couple really helpful words in a different section that was titled Family is Forever. So, can you speak to the roles that gentleness and gratitude play in creating an enjoyable family culture? Yes. Allie Stanley Cooney: (34:23 - 34:31) Yeah, well, I feel like a lot of girls feel like they don't have a lot of control within their family dynamics. Sandra Stanley: (34:31 - 34:34) So, this was the topic on family in the book. Allie Stanley Cooney: (34:34 - 36:07) So, you don't choose your family. You're not choosing what you're having for dinner. You're not choosing your curfew or your classes. A lot of times in that season, it can feel like there's no control. And so, I wanted to give the girls a couple things that, hey, you do have a choice in these and you do control these as far as it depends on you. And so those things were appreciation, forgiveness, and gentleness. So, appreciation, you can choose to appreciate your family. You can choose to appreciate your mom. You can choose to say thank you to the people around you for what they do. Forgiveness, you choose to forgive. And then gentleness. This came a lot from my relationship with my brothers specifically. How is the youngest of three? Of the youngest, I have two older brothers, and they were mean. Not gentle. They were mean. And so, learning like, hey, they want you to respond in aggression. They want you to get angry. That's kind of- They want a reaction. They want a reaction from you. And so responding in gentleness is actually how you deescalate the situation. And I think that those things, it kind of gives girls like, oh, I'm not totally helpless. I'm not totally out of control. I can actually choose these things and I can choose to do them or not. And I can see how it positively affects the family or if I choose not to do them, how it negatively affects the family. And we all have ownership in the family culture and vibes and feelings. And so, I think that helps the girls kind of have a grasp on something in their family. Laura Dugger: (36:08 - 38:01) That's so good. And even, not that either one is more important for the other, but I really was thinking that sets children apart if they are grateful. And that sets parents apart if they are gentle and both are obviously encouraged in the Bible. So I just thought that was incredible how you drew that out. Do you love The Savvy Sauce? Do you gain anything when you listen? Did you know that the two ways we earn money to keep this podcast live is through generous contributions from listeners and from our paying sponsors? That means we can promote your business and you're still supporting The Savvy Sauce. It's a win-win. Please email us today at info@thesavvysauce.com to inquire about pricing for sponsoring each episode. Thank you for your consideration. And Sandra, you've been a previous guest. I'll make sure and link to that episode in the show notes. That was about parenting, even starting with younger age children, which was wonderful. But Allie, this is my first time getting to meet you. So, I'll share with you too. Your dad was actually my first pastor after I became a believer. So, I remember him preaching a series on better decisions, fewer regrets. And he would challenge us to ask ourselves a question. I think I'm getting this right. In light of my past experiences, my current circumstances and my future hopes and dreams, what's the wise thing to do? And so, as we're nearing the close of our conversation, would you like to share, after absorbing all this information from the conversation and from your book, now what? What is the wise thing to do? Allie Stanley Cooney: (38:01 - 39:57) Yeah, so our last chapter is on decision-making because I do think all of it kind of points to the decisions and we point back to Philippians 4, where Paul is saying, now put it into practice. Everything you've learned, everything you've seen, all of these things, it's time to put it into practice. And so, pointing these girls and pointing these moms to stop in a moment and ask themselves exactly what you just said. Okay, in spite of my past and my present and my future, what is the wise thing to do? What is the thing that will lead to healthier relationships? What is the thing that will lead to less regret in the future? And I think it's even just a choice to stop and just ask that, because a lot of times we just go, go, go. We don't have time to stop to really think through anything, but the idea of, okay, before we make a decision, let's actually stop and ask ourselves, what is the wise thing to do? And it's not always gonna be popular. It's not always gonna be easy. And sometimes you might be the only one doing it, but I know in my experience, and even when I was in high school, I went to public school, so I was surrounded by a lot of people who weren't making the wisest decisions and they were my friends and realizing, okay, I'm gonna, even though it's not popular, even though they might laugh at me, even though this might not go well for me, I know what I want my future to look like and therefore I'm gonna do the right thing. I'm gonna say no, or I'm gonna say yes, or I'm gonna do whatever I know the right thing to do is and just trust that it's gonna be okay and trust that my close friends will stick by me and my family will stick by me and they'll be proud of me. And so I think it's hard to do in the moment, but if you have that filter and if you stop and ask, then I think it's really, really great for you and your future. Sandra Stanley: (39:58 - 41:46) And for moms and daughters to have this question in their back pocket as these things roll out, as hard decisions come along, it's just really important to ask what is the wise thing to do? And I think an approach for parenting in general, but especially for these moms of middle and high school girls, an approach and part of a conversation is, hey, Allie, I love you so much. And my goal is for you to get to the end of these middle school years or the end of these high school years with as few regrets as possible. So, we're gonna get in the habit of asking this question, what is the wise thing for me to do? What is the wise thing for me to do in this situation? And the second question we talk about in that decision-making chapter is what story do I wanna tell? When all of this is said and done, when this decision, even this one decision, when this is over and I'm on the other side of it, what is the story that I will want to tell? I think I'm gonna make that decision based on that. So those two questions, what is the wise thing to do and what story am I gonna wanna tell? Those are big, big conversation pieces for moms and daughters to have and for moms and kids in general and dads and families to have, what's the wise thing to do and what story do you wanna tell? Because we wanna get them to a place where they have as few regrets as possible and God can certainly use our regrets, He can use our stuff. We're not gonna be perfect. We are not gonna always get it right and we're not always gonna make the wise decision. And I think us being honest and chatting with our kids about decisions we didn't make that were the right ones that we might carry a little bit of baggage around on at the appropriate time and in the appropriate way, we can have those conversations with our kids and let them know, hey, I'm not perfect and I'm not expecting you to be perfect but let's get in the habit of asking these questions because they will cause us to have fewer regrets on the other side. Laura Dugger: (41:47 - 41:53) So, good and it really puts you on the same team which you are when you're having these conversations. Sandra Stanley: (41:53 - 42:18) And sometimes your kids don't feel that. They don't feel like we're on their team. They feel like we aren't because we don't want them to have fun or we don't want them to have freedom or whatever. And it really does. These conversations do emphasize, hey, I am on your team and I am only saying no to this because I am so for you. And I think these conversations set us up for that. Laura Dugger: (42:19 - 42:27) Well, you've shared some wise questions. Would you also be willing to share the prayer that Allie, I believe you prayed through high school? Allie Stanley Cooney: (42:28 - 42:36) Yes, the prayer is give me the wisdom to know what's right and the courage to do what's right, even when it's hard and even when I have to do it by myself. Sandra Stanley: (42:36 - 43:23) We started praying that for our kids before they even knew what we were saying. When they were toddlers, we were praying this prayer with them. And as they got older, that's when we tacked on the end, even if I'm the only one, even if I'm doing it by myself. Because as you get older and you get into middle school and high school, sometimes you feel like you're the only one. And we celebrated like crazy when we caught our kids making a hard decision and especially if they were the only one. So, when we saw them making wise decisions, we didn't always catch it, but if we did, we wanted them to know this is to be celebrated because what's rewarded is repeated. And we wanted to reward our kids for making those tough decisions. And I think Allie carried that on with her all the way through, so. Laura Dugger: (43:24 - 43:36) Love that so much. And really, it's such a joy to learn from both of you. Can you tell us where to go after this conversation where we can continue learning from the wisdom of each of you? Sandra Stanley: (43:36 - 43:56) Thank you. Yeah, the book is anywhere that you buy books, you know, on Amazon, all of the different places where you buy books. My website, sandrastanley.com has lots of links. Instagram, Allie Kay Cooney, yeah. So we're talking about it a lot these days, just in the season of talking about maybe in the middle. Laura Dugger: (43:57 - 44:13) Love it. Well, you may know that I have one final question for you because we are called The Savvy Sauce because savvy is synonymous with practical knowledge. And so as my final question for each one of you today, what is your savvy sauce? Sandra Stanley: (44:14 - 45:04) You go. Okay, I'll start first. I think, Laura, it really is my calendar dictates my life. But again, that's kind of a personality thing. But for me, if I don't get it on my calendar, it may or may not get done. So for me to put the biggest, most important things on my calendar, it just makes life more smooth for me. So, I use my calendar for everything. There was a season where I even calendared exercise because it was a crazy season. I thought if I don't put it on here, I'm not gonna do it. I have a rhythm with that now, so it's a little bit easier. But even things like making sure I'm checking in with my mom and dad, because they are in there getting to their late eighties and, you know, just little reminders of things that are most important that I don't wanna miss, that are easy to miss when I get busy, I just use my calendar for everything. Allie Stanley Cooney: (45:05 - 45:51) Yeah, I think, I don't know if this is exactly what you mean, but recently, I wanna be off my phone more because it's just everyone's addicted to their phone. So, I got this thing called a brick, and I saw it on Instagram, ironically. But you can tap your phone onto it, and it basically shuts down any app other than whatever apps you want. And the whole thing is you're turning your phone back into a tool and not a distraction. And it's pretty much changed my life. Because I'll sleep with it on brick, and then so I can't wake up and just like be on my phone. So, then I have to like intentionally undo it to go on Instagram or do whatever. And then I just keep it bricked. And so, I'm not just scrolling, and it's been really, really helpful. Laura Dugger: (45:52 - 46:21) I love it, those are so wonderful. And God has just blessed both of you with so many gifts, but I'm seeing so much wisdom, so much beauty in both of you, but your generosity to share because you have a unique family situation and are very well known. And yet you just are giving of yourselves through the time here, through the knowledge and wisdom that you shared in your book. So, I want to say thank you for a thousand things, but thank you for being my guest today. Sandra Stanley: (46:21 - 46:26) Thank you for having us. We really appreciate it. This was very fun. Yeah. Laura Dugger: (46:27 - 49:41) One more thing before you go. Have you heard the term gospel before? It simply means good news. And I want to share the best news with you. But it starts with the bad news. Every single one of us were born sinners, but Christ desires to rescue us from our sin, which is something we cannot do for ourselves. This means there is absolutely no chance we can make it to heaven on our own. So for you and for me, it means we deserve death and we can never pay back the sacrifice we owe to be saved. We need a savior. But God loved us so much, he made a way for his only son to willingly die in our place as the perfect substitute. This gives us hope of life forever in right relationship with him. That is good news. Jesus lived the perfect life we could never live and died in our place for our sin. This was God's plan to make a way to reconcile with us so that God can look at us and see Jesus. We can be covered and justified through the work Jesus finished if we choose to receive what He has done for us. Romans 10:9 says, “That if you confess with your mouth Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved.” So would you pray with me now? Heavenly Father, thank you for sending Jesus to take our place. I pray someone today right now is touched and chooses to turn their life over to you. Will you clearly guide them and help them take their next step in faith to declare you as Lord of their life? We trust you to work and change lives now for eternity. In Jesus' name we pray. Amen. If you prayed that prayer, you are declaring him for me, so me for him. You get the opportunity to live your life for him. And at this podcast, we're called The Savvy Sauce for a reason. We want to give you practical tools to implement the knowledge you have learned. So you ready to get started? First, tell someone. Say it out loud. Get a Bible. The first day I made this decision, my parents took me to Barnes & Noble and let me choose my own Bible. I selected the Quest NIV Bible and I love it. You can start by reading the book of John. Also, get connected locally, which just means tell someone who's a part of a church in your community that you made a decision to follow Christ. I'm assuming they will be thrilled to talk with you about further steps, such as going to church and getting connected to other believers to encourage you. We want to celebrate with you too, so feel free to leave a comment for us here if you did make a decision to follow Christ. We also have show notes included where you can read Scripture that describes this process. And finally, be encouraged. Luke 15:10 says, “In the same way I tell you, there is rejoicing in the presence of the angels of God over one sinner who repents.” The heavens are praising with you for your decision today. And if you've already received this good news, I pray you have someone to share it with. You are loved and I look forward to meeting you here next time.
This week on Wire Talk, we welcome Sandra Stanley and her daughter Allie Cooney, co-authors of Meet Me in the Middle, a book designed to help moms and daughters build strong, faith-filled relationships. Sandra and Allie share lessons from their own relationship, and insights from their book—covering everything from communication struggles to the challenges of raising (and being) a teen girl today. They discuss the importance of creating a safe space for daughters, avoiding the “know-it-all” trap as moms, and learning to let go of control while guiding daughters toward wisdom and faith. Episode Recap:6:30 - Sandra Stanley & Allie Cooney join us to talk about their book, Meet Me in the Middle13:00 - This book was written for girls in 5th through 10th grade and their moms14:30 - Social media creates so much noise for our daughters today17:20 - Moms and daughters are facing many of the same pressures, just at different times in our lives and at different levels of maturity. 20:02 - When our girls feel safe with us, they are more likely to share with us22:00 - We don't need to turn everything into a teachable moment, be interested and be humble24:00 - It is normal for teen girls to pull away in this season27:35 - How do we help our daughters deal with comparison?31:10 - What we do in parenting is far more important than what we sayScripture for Reflection: Philippians 4:4-9 (NIV) "Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me—put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you.”Questions for Discussion:Sandra and Allie emphasize that moms should aim to be a safe place for their daughters. What are some ways you've seen this play out in your own parenting? What challenges make it difficult for you to be that safe space?Allie mentioned that her mom, instead of forcing conversations, placed wise mentors in her life. Does your daughter have wise women in her world other than you that she could learn from?Have you ever found yourself turning every conversation into a teachable moment? How can you shift toward more natural, two-way conversations with your kids?What are some practical ways you model faith in your daily life, and how do you encourage your daughter to cultivate her own personal faith journey?Resources:Register for SOAR 2025 in the BOAW Moms app today [App Store] [Google Play]Pick up a copy of Meet Me in the Middle: https://amzn.to/42JaRp1
In today's episode, I had the joy of interviewing the dynamic mother-daughter duo: Allie (Cooney) & Sandra Stanley. Being in the same family as influential pastor Andy Stanley, founder of North Point Church, Allie talks about the unique experiences, expectations and lessons learned from growing up in a family defined by faith, leadership and public attention.Allie, now married with a daughter of her own, has written a book with her mom exploring the dynamics of mother-daughter relationships. During our time together, they share heartfelt stories, practical advice, and offer a glimpse into what it was like being raised in an environment where Christian principles are not just taught, but lived.Allie drills down into why she still loves the church and has chosen to stay when so many others - especially pastor's kids - have walked away.Grab a copy of Sandra and Allie's book: Meet Me in the MiddleThanks to our amazing partners on this episode: International Justice Mission & Generous CoffeeInternational Justice Mission is a global nonprofit working to end slavery and violence around the world, taking special care of survivors from the moment they're rescued all the way through their healing and restoration. To learn more and support their mission, visit ijm.org Generous Coffee sells some of the best coffee in the world AND 100% of profits are donated to nonprofit organizations that are fighting injustice facing humans around the world. You can find out more (including purchasing in bulk) at generousmovement.com Subscribe to The Conversation on YouTube and watch the full interview with Sandra & Allie: youtube.com/@adamaweber Sign up for The Crew: adamweber.com/thecrew
The mother-daughter relationship can be one of the richest and most rewarding bonds we get to experience here on earth. It can also be one of the most complicated, especially in the teen and young adult years. Today we are thrilled to have Sandra Stanley and Allie Stanley Cooney, authors of Meet Me in the Middle, discussing the importance of foundations in the mother-daughter relationship. They emphasize the need to root our identity in faith and how it affects every aspect of life. We also discuss the significance of pursuing and valuing the relationship a mother has with her daughter, even during times of tension and conflict, and what it looks like to become students of our daughters. We also cover forgiveness, and the importance of allowing time for healing, not dictating when forgiveness should occur. This episode is unique because we get to hear from a mother's AND a daughter's perspective. If you are looking to improve your relationship with your daughter, this episode is for you! FIND MORE ABOUT SANDRA STANLEY & ALLIE STANLEY Sandra Stanley's- Website and Instagram Allie Stanley's - Instagram Sandra & Allie's book- Meet Me in the Middle A FEW THINGS MENTIONED Galatians 6:7-9 3 Superpowers -Forgiveness -Gentleness -Appreciation QUESTIONS TO HELP YOU RISE Was there anything from the interview you really want to adopt or take with you, maybe it was a phrase, a prayer, or a concept? What is one way you can get healthier as a mom? In the interview Sandra & Allie talked about appreciation, forgiveness and gentleness as a superpower, which one do you most need in your relationship with your daughter right now? How can you continue to pursue your daughter in this stage of your relationship? How could you incorporate more fun into your time with your daughter? LET'S CONNECT! Did you like this episode? Let us know and leave a review on itunes or share it with a friend. Or message us on Instagram – we'd love to hear from you! Get the Daily Dozen Checklist -12 habits that will immediately make you happier and healthier
This week, I'm so excited to welcome Sandra Stanley and her daughter, Allie Stanley Cooney, as our guests. Sandra, a familiar face on the show, is a dedicated foster parent, foster advocate, and co-author of the book Parenting: Getting It Right. This time, Sandra is joined by her daughter, Allie, who has a Master's in Christian Education and background in student ministry, to discuss their book Meet Me in the Middle: 8 Mother-Daughter Conversations about Life and Faith. This book is such an incredible resource for those looking to strengthen their relationship with young girls in their lives. As a mom of a tween girl myself, this conversation was so insightful and encouraging. Moms, grandmas, sisters, dads, uncles, and mentors- there is something in this episode for you! 4:52 – Allie 101 Georgia native, pastor family, youngest of 3 Background in student ministry and Christian education Wife and mom 7:27 – Sandra 201 Life as a grandmother Writing a book with Allie 36 years of marriage 8:26 – Writing a Book Together What led Sandra and Allie to write this book Having hard conversations ahead of time Setting your child up for success 15:24 – The Imperfect Path of Parenting Appreciating a parent's love when you become a parent Making mistakes as a parent Allowing children to make mistakes in a safe environment The unique dynamic of a mother/daughter relationship Philippians 4:4-9 as a foundation for this book 28:16 – Meet Me In The Middle How this book is structured Identity and self-worth in middle and high school What we model matters Parenting in the age of social media Helping your children own their faith 48:17 – Final Thoughts Navigating big feelings with your children Getting your copy of Meet Me In The Middle Encouragement for moms and mentors FEATURED QUOTES “If we can bridge the gap between moms and daughters so that they can have some of the hard conversations ahead of time, before…. there's conflict and tension…it is such a win when those hard times come.” “We really wanted to structure it in a way that a grandmother or an aunt or a mentor could also pick it up and do this with the young lady in their life that they love and who is important to them.” “You don't have to change, you don't have to pretend, you don't have to give up hope, because Jesus did all of that on your behalf… You are enough and you are loved, and you are a child of God.” “What we model matters, and it matters in the development of our children's faith and how they view their Heavenly Father.” Learn more about Sandra and Allie: https://www.sandrastanley.com/meetmeinthemiddle Get your copy of Meet Me in the Middle https://www.amazon.com/Meet-Me-Middle-Mother-Daughter-Conversations/dp/0310368677 Get your copy of Parenting: Getting It Right https://www.amazon.com/Parenting-Getting-Right-Andy-Stanley/dp/0310366275/ref=sr_1_1?dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.zWEmq7GGvxYEchs0KShkw_xA3D4LBVR9tIJAm0eZLRgsDPFM_0sVtgStL4OceEucDiZxuWVTa7BVc4qDvnVWp7BeV1To3BFO9wjky07Q-79EBPiNXZ7kgu1gkj4eK0vUojrsnXGW9LG5NIcO6A9y3vGgpzBMRJ6okTT9KESOzRcswK2SRxd7AYBXH5v9trlMJNfAeRisd-GLAzzEHg0BnNrdhj8Ng9QM9egb7OTAdCo.K97LQwbs-mFGFmMBDRy1cpDI5RVsSO8JoZbkRnss_qA&dib_tag=se&hvadid=634502039983&hvdev=c&hvlocphy=9010494&hvnetw=g&hvqmt=e&hvrand=5591213651008220050&hvtargid=kwd-1913356014711&hydadcr=27890_14488800&keywords=parenting+getting+it+right&qid=1725999611&sr=8-1 Allie on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/alliekaycooney/?hl=en Sandra on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/sandrawstanley/?hl=en Connect with me: http://www.stillbeingmolly.com http://instagram.com/stillbeingmolly http://instagram.com/canilaughpod http://twitter.com/stillbeingmolly http://facebook.com/stillbeingmolly http://facebook.com/canilaughpod http://tiktok.com/@stillbeingmolly GET YOUR COPY of ‘IF I DON'T LAUGH, I'LL CRY” TODAY: Barnes & Noble: https://bit.ly/IIDLICbn Amazon: https://amzn.to/48VYFkG ChristianBook: https://bit.ly/IIDLICcb Target: https://bit.ly/3Shh3Q2 Walmart: https://bit.ly/3MmGVpJ Indie Bound: https://bit.ly/IIDLICib Audible: https://amzn.to/3ITcdm8 Kindle: https://amzn.to/3ITaSvv About Can I Laugh On Your Shoulder? Can I Laugh On Your Shoulder? Podcast is a weekly podcast where we have honest conversations about faith, business, life, and everything in between. Hosted by speaker and author, Molly Stillman, her mission is to make you laugh, cry, and laugh till you cry. She wants to create a community of people who are unafraid to be themselves and have honest conversations about the things that matter most. Her vision is to create a safe space for people to explore their faith and share their stories and gifts with the world.
One of my favorite conversations on this podcast was with Sandra Stanley about her book Parenting: Getting It Right, and I still go back to it often. So, when I had the opportunity to talk with Sandra again, this time joined by her daughter Allie, I knew I couldn't pass it up! We're diving into building strong, healthy relationships between mothers and daughters.Here's what you'll learn in today's episode:How to foster open communication and maintain a close relationship with your daughter, especially during those challenging teenage years.We discuss the pressures and fears teen girls face, like comparison, identity formation, and the fear of being alone—and how moms often share these struggles.Sandra and Allie offer practical guidance and activities to help you connect with your daughter and navigate these topics together.The importance of strong family relationships for both faith and personal growth, making this conversation valuable for every parent—whether or not you have a daughter.About Sandra and Allie Stanley:Sandra Stanley is the co-author of Parenting: Getting It Right and a trusted voice in Christian parenting, while Allie Stanley Cooney brings the perspective of a daughter who has experienced these formative years firsthand. Together, they've written Meet Me in the Middle, a book designed to help mothers and daughters strengthen their relationships and grow together in faith.This conversation is packed with insights that every parent can benefit from, whether or not you have a daughter. I know you'll walk away with practical tools and encouragement to foster connection and growth in your family. Connect with Sandra and Allie:https://www.sandrastanley.com/Instagram: @standrawstanleyInstagram: @alliekaycooneyResources Mentioned:Meet Me in the MiddleParenting: Getting It RightPolitics SimplifiedA Life of Faith prayer journalChristian Parenting storeOur Sponsors:* Check out IXL and use my code TODAY for a great deal: www.ixl.comPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy
Sandra Stanley and her daughter, Allie Stanley Cooney, discuss their new book, Meet Me in the Middle, which focuses on mother-daughter conversations about life and faith. They emphasize the importance of open and honest communication between mothers and daughters, especially before crises occur. The book provides activities and conversation prompts to facilitate these discussions. Sandra and Allie also address the challenges of comparison and offer advice on how to break free from the comparison trap. They encourage mothers and daughters to approach their relationship with humility, forgiveness, and gentleness. The book is designed to strengthen the bond between mothers and daughters and promote unity in the family.KeywordsSandra Stanley, Allie Stanley Cooney, Meet Me in the Middle, mother-daughter conversations, life, faith, open communication, crises, comparison, comparison trap, humility, forgiveness, gentleness, unityTakeawaysOpen and honest communication is crucial in mother-daughter relationships.The book Meet Me in the Middle provides activities and conversation prompts to facilitate meaningful discussions between mothers and daughters.Breaking free from the comparison trap involves celebrating others and leveraging one's own gifts.Mothers and daughters should approach their relationship with humility, forgiveness, and gentleness.The book is designed to strengthen the bond between mothers and daughters and promote unity in the family.Sound Bites"Sometimes parent-child conversations can feel forced or awkward.""Comparison is a universal struggle, but fixing our eyes on Jesus can help us break free.""No family is perfect, but humility and forgiveness can strengthen relationships."Chapters00:00 | Introduction and Personal Connections05:26 | The Importance of Open Conversations08:38 | Creating a Resource for Spiritual Growth11:29 | Breaking Free from the Comparison Trap14:28 | Advice for Moms and Daughters20:28 | Navigating Difficult Relationships26:30 | Initiating Conversations and Building Autonomy30:28 | Designing the Perfect Beautiful Day34:44 | Closing35:39 | New ChapterBook Website: https://www.zondervan.com/p/meet-me-in-the-middle/Sandra StanleyInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/sandrawstanley Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/sandra.w.stanley/ X: https://twitter.com/sandrawstanley Website: https://www.sandrastanley.com/ Allie Stanley CooneyInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/alliekaycooney X: https://twitter.com/alliekaystanley
Welcome back to the kitchen table. Bethany, drawing from her own experiences raising daughters, knows how challenging the teenage years can be for both moms and their daughters. The transition from middle school to high school often brings a whirlwind of emotions, from excitement to apprehension. Understanding these dynamics, Sandra Stanley and her daughter, Allie, have created a resource to help mothers and daughters strengthen their connection, communication, and faith. In today's episode, Bethany sits down with Sandra and Allie to delve into their new book, Meet Me in the Middle. This book offers an approach by alternating chapters between Sandra and Allie, creating a dialogue that speaks directly to both moms and their teenage daughters. This format aims to facilitate meaningful conversations and address potential issues before they escalate, all from a faith-centered perspective. Meet Me in the Middle explores themes of identity and the gospel, encouraging readers to build a strong personal and spiritual foundation. Sandra and Allie's book is designed to foster deep connections and mutual understanding between mothers and daughters by engaging in conversations rooted in their shared faith. Sandra and Allie's heartfelt and practical advice can guide you through the complexities of the teenage years, offering valuable insights for building a supportive and open relationship. This book is a must-read for any mom or daughter navigating this pivotal stage of life. Purchase Meet Me in the Middle Connect with Sandra: https://www.instagram.com/sandrawstanley/ Connect with Allie: https://www.instagram.com/alliekaycooney/ Connect with Bethany hereFollow her on Instagram @bethanykimsey
For those that are new around here, I release bonus episodes that serve a niche part of my audience, I have listeners of all faith backgrounds that listen to the podcast. This episode is coming from a christian perspective so if that's something that doesn't fit what you're looking for, check out the other episode that dropped this week or join me back here next Tuesday for a conversation that you don't want to miss!Have you ever wondered how to bridge the gap between moms and daughters during those challenging teenage years? In today's episode, we're diving deep into that very question with mother-daughter duo, Sandra and Allie Stanley. They've just released their new book, Meet Me in the Middle, which tackles the tough yet vital conversations about life, faith, and the rollercoaster of teenage emotions. Together, they explore how to navigate topics like comparison, relationships, fears, and identity formation, all while emphasizing the importance of a strong family foundation. We'll also touch on the impact of social media, the power of journaling, and practical tips for fostering meaningful connections. Whether you're a mom, a daughter, or someone invested in nurturing these relationships, this conversation is packed with insights and advice you won't want to miss.About Sandra & Allie |Sandra Stanley received her Bachelor of Science degree from Georgia Tech and Master of Arts from Dallas Theological Seminary. Sandra has a heart for foster kids and foster families, as she and Andy have been foster parents since 2010. Her ministry passion is promoting foster care in the local church. Much of her time these days is spent working on various writing projects and continuing her involvement with Fostering Together, the foster care initiative of North Point Ministries.Allie Cooney graduated from Auburn University with a degree in Communication. She completed the North Point Residency program and simultaneously earned a Masters of Christian Education degree from Dallas Theological Seminary. With a decade worth of experience in guiding students along their spiritual journeys, Allie is passionate about empowering middle, high school, and college students to embrace a life devoted to following Jesus wholeheartedly. Allie has a heart for middle school and high school students and can often be spotted at any number of local coffee shops pouring into girls in those seasons of life.Links Discussed in This Episode |Order a Copy of Minimalist Moms: Living and Parenting with SimplicityPrevious Episode: Bonus Episode: Finding "It" (An Intentional Parenting Strategy) with Sandra StanleyBook: The Gift of Fear by Gavin De BeckerAllie's Resource: Book: Treasures in the Dark by Katherine WolfeSandra's Resource: Logos Bible StudyMend Coffee ShopBook: Outlive by Peter AttiaConnect with AllieInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/alliekaycooney Connect with Sandra:Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/sandrawstanley Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/sandra.w.stanley/ Website: https://www.sandrastanley.com/Episode Sponsors |The Minimalist Moms Podcast would not be possible without the support of weekly sponsors. Choosing brands that I believe in is important to me. I only want to recommend brands that I believe may help you in your daily life. As always, never feel pressured into buying anything. Remember: if you don't need it, it's not a good deal!Enjoy the Podcast? Post a review and share it! If you enjoyed tuning into this podcast, then do not hesitate to write a review. You can also share this with your fellow mothers so that they can be inspired to think more and do with less. Order (or review) my book, Minimalist Moms: Living & Parenting With Simplicity.Questions |You can contact me through my website, find me on Instagram, Pinterest or like The Minimalist Moms Page on Facebook.Checkout the Minimalist Moms Podcast storefront for recommendations from Diane.Need help decluttering? I'm here to help! If you've been struggling with motivation to declutter, I'd love to help you achieve your goals in your home. We'll work together (locally or virtually) to discover what areas in your home are high priority to get you feeling less overwhelmed right away. For more info on my processes, fees, and availability please contact!Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/minimalist-moms-podcast2093/exclusive-contentAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands
One of our favorite interviews we've ever done was with the wonderful and insightful Sandra and Andy Stanley. THIS WEEK, we got to meet their daughter, Allie! On this episode of the podcast, we get to talk with Allie and Sandra together and dive into the mother/daughter relationship, which moms—you know, can be one of your biggest sources of both joy and heartache. We talk about it all in this episode and specific ways to strengthen your relationship TODAY. And, it's all based on Allie and Sandra's new book, which we would HIGHLY recommend, Meet Me in the Middle! If you have a daughter, grab yourself and her a copy today! Sandra's Potato-Bacon Frittata (Serves 6) 3 Tablespoons Butter 2 Cups Frozen Potatoes w/onions & peppers 6 Large Eggs 2 Tablespoons Milk 1/4 Teaspoon Salt 1/4 Teaspoon Pepper 1 Cup Shredded Cheddar 6 Slices Bacon, Cooked & Crumbled Garnishes: diced fresh tomato or picante sauce *Melt butter in 10' skillet over medium heat. Add frozen potatoes, cook 10 minutes or until browned. *Combine eggs and next three ingredients; stirring with whisk, pour over pot. *As mixture starts to cook, gently lift edges of frittata with spatula, and tilt pan so uncooked portion flows underneath. If center remains uncooked, carefully turn frittata over and cook 5 minutes until center is done. . . . . . Sign up to receive the monthly newsletter to keep up to date with where David and Sissy are speaking, where they are taco'ing, PLUS conversation starters for you and your family to share! Go behind the scenes and watch our podcast on YouTube! Download a copy of the Raising Boys and Girls Feelings Chart. Connect with David, Sissy, and Melissa at raisingboysandgirls.com. . . . . . If you would like to partner with Raising Boys and Girls as a podcast sponsor, fill out our Advertise with us form. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Today's episode is with my first mother-daughter duo, Sandra Stanley and Allie Stanley Cooney. They co-wrote the book, Meet Me in the Middle, which release today! The share their experiences of growing up in the church and how they both discovered their callings in college and developed a relationship with God that was their own. They talk about how they walked through Allie's battle with anxiety and panic attacks and how they learned more about each other and themselves. They talk about their reasons behind writing this book and how they want to encourage any type of relationship, whether it is mother-daughter, aunt-niece, mento-mentee, etc to grow closer to each other, but most importantly, grow closer to God and move towards what He wants for each of us to be. I pray this episode blesses you and that you will share it with the women, and men in your lives because I believe everyone can benefit from something we said. Bios: Sandra Stanley received her Bachelor of Science degree from Georgia Tech and Master of Arts from Dallas Theological Seminary. Sandra has a heart for foster kids and foster families, as she and Andy have been foster parents since 2010. Her ministry passion is promoting foster care in the local church. Much of her time these days is spent working on various writing projects and continuing her involvement with Fostering Together, the foster care initiative of North Point Ministries. Allie Stanley Cooney graduated from Auburn University with a degree in Communication. She completed the North Point Residency program and simultaneously earned a Masters of Christian Education degree from Dallas Theological Seminary. With a decade of experience guiding students along their spiritual journeys, Allie is passionate about empowering middle school, high school and college students to embrace a life devoted to following Jesus wholeheartedly. She has a heart for middle school and high school students and can often be spotted at any number of local coffee shops pouring into girls in those seasons of life. Anchor Verses: Sandra- Philippians 4:6-7 Allie- 1 John 1:3 Connect with Sandra and Allie: Sandra Stanley Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/sandrawstanley Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/sandra.w.stanley/ X: https://twitter.com/sandrawstanley Website: https://www.sandrastanley.com/ Allie Stanley Cooney Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/alliekaycooney X: https://twitter.com/alliekaystanley ***We love hearing from our listeners! Sharing your thoughts through reviews is a fantastic way to be a part of our podcast family and contribute to the conversation. If you've enjoyed our podcast, leaving a review is quick and easy! Just head to Apple podcasts or wherever you are tuning in and share your thoughts. Your feedback makes a big difference!***
In this heartwarming episode of The 1000 Hours Outside Podcast, Ginny Yurich is joined by mother-daughter duo Sandra Stanley and Allie Stanley Cooley to discuss their new book, Meet Me in the Middle: Eight Mother-Daughter Conversations About Life and Faith. Together, they explore the dynamics of the mother-daughter relationship, emphasizing the importance of open communication, especially during the challenging pre-teen and teenage years. Sandra and Allie share their experiences and insights on handling comparison, managing expectations, and the significance of family relationships. They also reflect on the unique process of co-authoring a book and how their different approaches to writing complemented each other. Whether you're a mom, daughter, or mentor, this episode offers valuable wisdom and encouragement for nurturing meaningful connections. ** Get your copy of Meet Me in the Middle here Learn more here ** Download your free 1000 Hours Outside tracker here >> https://www.1000hoursoutside.com/trackers Find everything you need to kick off your 1000 Hours Outside Journey here >> https://www.1000hoursoutside.com/blog/allthethings Order of copy of Ginny's newest book, Until the Streetlights Come On here >> https://amzn.to/3RXjBlN Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Josiah and Micah sit down with Sandra Stanley and her daughter Allie Stanley Cooney to talk about parenting the next generation. We unpack the 4 stages of parenting, what is different about raising children in this generation, why the faith of the next generation is worth everything, and Allie & Sandra's new book "Meet Me in the Middle" Copies of "Meet Me in the Middle" are available at: https://amzn.to/4dC01Un www.youngadults.today
Are you struggling to connect with your teenage daughter? Do you find yourself wishing for more meaningful conversations that strengthen your bond? In this episode of the "Power Your Parenting: Moms with Teens" podcast, Sandra Stanley and her daughter, Allie Stanley Cooney, join us to discuss their new book, Meet Me in the Middle: Eight Mother-Daughter Conversations About Life and Faith. They share their journey of co-authoring the book, where each wrote separate sections for mothers and daughters, and how they created a "meet me in the middle" section to foster open dialogue and deeper understanding. Sandra Stanley received her Bachelor of Science degree from Georgia Tech and Master of Arts from Dallas Theological Seminary. Sandra has a heart for foster kids and foster families, as she and Andy have been foster parents since 2010. Her ministry passion is promoting foster care in the local church. Much of her time these days is spent working on various writing projects and continuing her involvement with Fostering Together, the foster care initiative of North Point Ministries. Allie Stanley Cooney graduated from Auburn University with a degree in Communication. She completed the North Point Residency program and simultaneously earned a Masters of Christian Education degree from Dallas Theological Seminary. She has a heart for middle school and high school students and can often be spotted at any number of local coffee shops pouring into girls in those seasons of life. The episode is packed with practical advice on navigating the tricky waters of the mother-daughter relationship during the teen years, focusing on the importance of communication, understanding each other's fears, and managing stress together. Key takeaways include the importance of being a student of your daughter—understanding her unique personality, fears, and stressors—and how this awareness can transform your relationship. Sandra and Allie emphasize the power of preemptive conversations, discussing tough topics before they become conflicts, and how these dialogues can lay a foundation of trust and mutual respect. They also highlight that even when challenges arise, maintaining the relationship should always be the priority, helping moms and daughters grow closer through the ups and downs of adolescence. Website: https://www.sandrastanley.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/sandrawstanley https://www.instagram.com/alliekaycooney Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
If you want to hear some great advice for moms and their middle school daughters, you've come to the right place. This mom and daughter duo of Sandra Stanley and Allie Stanley Cooney have written a fantastic book called Meet Me In The Middle written specifically for moms and their middle and early high school daughters and designed to assist them in growing in connection, communication and faith before a crisis forces them to. Pre-Order the book Meet Me In The Middle: 8 Mother-Daughter Conversations about Life and Faith https://amzn.to/46HmCw3 Back To School Bundle https://youthminresources.gumroad.com/l/UjkJ Head, Shoulders, Knees, Toes, Cup https://youtu.be/gUzoVGmsl5s?si=vqOKapR9-TWdkDLG I'd love to connect www.instagram.com/thedproject www.facebook.com/paulwturner www.thediscipleproject.net Youth Ministry Store https://gumroad.com/youthminresources Custom Youth Ministry Resources Fiverr page https://www.fiverr.com/thedproject Youth Pastor Coaching https://gum.co/Zvak
Top Ten from 2023 #4 Parenting for the Relationship with Sandra Stanley Proverbs 27:18 a “He who tends the fig tree will eat its fruit,“ Questions and Topics We Discuss: Will you share the story of how you and Andy arrived at your overall vision and goal for parenting? How does the “law of the harvest” apply to parenting? Will you share your family's personal "keystone habits" you chose to set in place, rather than creating a long list of rules? Sandra Stanley received her bachelor of science degree from Georgia Tech and master of arts from Dallas Theological Seminary. Sandra has a heart for foster kids and foster families, as she and Andy have been foster parents since 2010. Her ministry passion is promoting foster care in the local church. Much of her time these days is spent working on various writing projects and continuing her involvement with Fostering Together, the foster care initiative of North Point Ministries. North Point Community Church Resources Thank You to Our Sponsors: For Girls Like You Connect with The Savvy Sauce through Our Website Please help us out by sharing this episode with a friend, leaving a 5-star rating and review, and subscribing to this podcast! Gospel Scripture: (all NIV) Romans 3:23 “for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God,” Romans 3:24 “and are justified freely by his grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus.” Romans 3:25 (a) “God presented him as a sacrifice of atonement, through faith in his blood.” Hebrews 9:22 (b) “without the shedding of blood there is no forgiveness.” Romans 5:8 “But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” Romans 5:11 “Not only is this so, but we also rejoice in God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have now received reconciliation.” John 3:16 “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.” Romans 10:9 “That if you confess with your mouth, “Jesus is Lord,” and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved.” Luke 15:10 says “In the same way, I tell you, there is rejoicing in the presence of the angels of God over one sinner who repents.” Romans 8:1 “Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus” Ephesians 1:13–14 “And you also were included in Christ when you heard the word of truth, the gospel of your salvation. Having believed, you were marked in him with a seal, the promised Holy Spirit, who is a deposit guaranteeing our inheritance until the redemption of those who are God's possession- to the praise of his glory.” Ephesians 1:15–23 “For this reason, ever since I heard about your faith in the Lord Jesus and your love for all the saints, I have not stopped giving thanks for you, remembering you in my prayers. I keep asking that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the glorious Father, may give you the spirit of wisdom and revelation, so that you may know him better. I pray also that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you, the riches of his glorious inheritance in the saints, and his incomparably great power for us who believe. That power is like the working of his mighty strength, which he exerted in Christ when he raised him from the dead and seated him at his right hand in the heavenly realms, far above all rule and authority, power and dominion, and every title that can be given, not only in the present age but also in the one to come. And God placed all things under his feet and appointed him to be head over everything for the church, which is his body, the fullness of him who fills everything in every way.” Ephesians 2:8–10 “For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith – and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God – not by works, so that no one can boast. For we are God‘s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.“ Ephesians 2:13 “But now in Christ Jesus you who once were far away have been brought near through the blood of Christ.“ Philippians 1:6 “being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.”
Welcome back to the kitchen table. Bethany sits down with her good friend and mentor, Sandra Stanley, to begin a heartfelt conversation about understanding the myth of balance and accepting that, as mothers, we don't have to do it all. Sandra shares her journey of living with purposeful presence during her seasons with her children and how she has learned to say no confidently. She emphasizes the importance of understanding the boundaries of your current season of life and offers wisdom, encouragement, and the assurance that God has a perfect plan for each one of us. Sandra's insights provide a refreshing perspective on motherhood, encouraging women to redefine success not by how much they can do, but by how present and intentional they are in their everyday lives. Through their heartfelt discussion, Bethany and Sandra offer listeners a blend of practical advice and spiritual wisdom, reminding them that God has a perfect plan for each one of us, and it's okay to trust in that plan rather than trying to control every aspect of life. Learn about Sandra: Sandra and Andy Stanley founded North Point Ministries in 1995. Married for 33 years, they have three children, ages 28, 27, and 25. Sandra is the author of two women's devotional books with companion videos—Comparison Trap and Breathing Room. Her ministry passion is promoting foster care in the local church. She received her undergraduate degree from Georgia Tech and a Masters of Biblical Studies from Dallas Theological Seminary. Much of her time these days is spent working on various writing projects and continuing her involvement with Fostering Together—the foster care initiative at North Point Ministries. For more about Sandra, visit sandrastanley.com. Comparison Trap App Breathing Room App As featured in today's episode, here are the journal pages to help you identify the lies you're hearing and change your thinking: Journal Pages.
We would love to hear from you! Text us any feedback. In our summer kickoff episode, we dive into the heart of parenting. We'll discuss the crucial role of having a clear destination and trusting God's plan over our personal understanding. Hear about the balance between striving for excellence in parenting and recognizing the value of a basis of faith and intentional relationship-building.We will get practical as we break down the four stages of parenting from the book "Parenting: Getting It Right.": discipline, training, coaching, and friendship. We are excited for a summer filled with genuine, raw conversations aimed at strengthening our parenting tool box.Parenting - Getting It Right by Andy & Sandra Stanley:https://amzn.to/4ca7wB4Reflection questions to ask yourself:Do I know what our "North Star" is for our parenting goals?In which area of your parenting do you wish you were more God-honoring?Looking ahead to the friendship years, is there anything I need to change now to build a relationship that my children will choose to invest in even when they don't have to?JOIN ME ON SOCIAL MEDIA:Follow Along @ - https://www.instagram.com/nikkicronksmith/
We would love to hear from you! Text us any feedback. 20th EPISODE!!!!!Celebrate with us as we hit a podcast milestone that only the top 1% achieve—over 21 episodes of heartfelt conversations and today, it's all about the transformative power of love languages within the family unit. As we sail past this landmark, my gratitude overflows for you, our cherished listeners, and I'm thrilled to share a special giveaway that's close to my heart (peek at the show notes below for the juicy details). We're on a mission to love our spouses and children most effectively by speaking their unique love languages . Discover how to let your partner's heart sing with the right compliments or how to light up your child's day with a simple yet powerful note of encouragement. We'll navigate the subtleties of giving undivided attention, sharing meaningful interactions, and surprising loved ones with just-right gifts that say "you matter." And for those who feel supported through acts of service, I'll share how taking on a task or running an errand speaks volumes. Join me, as we tailor our actions to each unique love language, nurturing the affection that makes every family member feel truly cherished.GIVEAWAY DETAILSValued at over $400!!Here's what's included:
Join Cassandra, Melinda, and Krystal as they review Andy and Sandra Stanley's book, "Parenting: Getting It Right." Not only reviewing but also sharing real-life stories around the challenges and rewards of parenting. Find this book at: https://www.amazon.com/Parenting-Getting-Right-Andy-Stanley/dp/0310366275
Based on the book by Andy & Sandra Stanley, Parenting: Getting IT Right. We dive into the early stages and the four levels of stages of parenting and really focusing on what it looks like to discipline, train, and coach our kids whether it's our ACTUAL kids or in the classroom, sports team, church, etc! (or even dealing with adults as well!) Discipline (ages 0-5) Training (ages 5-12) Coaching (ages 12-18) Friendship (18+)
This week hosts Mike Nawrocki and Sarah Humphrey interview author Sandra Stanley about her new book, written with husband Andy, Parenting: Getting it Right. Am I getting parenting right? Most parents at all stages find themselves asking this question. Whether you're sleep-deprived with a colicky newborn or navigating the emotional roller coaster of a teenager, parenting has its lows and highs, its confusion and clarity, its big blowups and small victories. And no matter our family's makeup or our children's personalities, many of us experience anxiety over our children's futures and often fear making a mistake. Andy and Sandra Stanley are no strangers to this feeling. As parents of three grown children and cofounders of North Point Ministries, the Stanleys have spent decades teaching and learning. They've counseled families, mentored others, and learned from mentors of their own, all while leading one of the largest churches in the country. In Parenting: Getting It Right (Zondervan Books; January 17, 2023), Andy and Sandra combine their experience and wisdom into a guide that helps readers understand and live by essential parenting principles. --------------------------------------------------------------------------- The BIble for Kids is now a 501c3 non-profit and we'd love to have you join us in our mission of reaching kids with the message of the Bible. Our NEW store now features "Pay What You Can" pricing on many items with more coming soon. Visit TheBibleforKids.com to donate or learn more today! The Bible for Kids Podcast is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. To find practical and spiritual advice to help you grow into the parent you want to be visit www.ChristianParenting.org
Based on the Parenting: Getting It Right book by Andy & Sandra Stanley, we dive into the question they focus on in Chapter 1, Did we get IT right? What is the goal with our parenting and what mistakes do we make along the way?! We are definitely NOT perfect when it comes to parenting but that's why we seek help and read books about it and we want to share any wisdom we take from it along the way! Highly recommend getting their book and reading it along with us as we dive into each chapter each week! https://a.co/d/dUFiNR5
Whether you're sleep deprived with a baby fresh from the hospital or you're trying to navigate the teenage years, parenting can be difficult and confusing.Every decision feels weighted, as you wonder how it might impact your child.Many parents often wonder if they're making the right choices and if their kids will want to be around them when they no longer have to be.But what would happen if we filter all of our parenting decisions through the lens of fostering a relationship with our children and our spouses? How would this one shift affect how we make decisions, how we discipline, and how we manage our calendars?And how could this parenting direction change the relationship we have with our kids long-term?In this episode, Jordan talks with author Sandra Stanley about parenting with the goal of relationships in mind.In this candid conversation, you'll learn:What parenting “with the relationship in mind” looks like and how it can inform every decision you make as a parentThe four stages of parenting and how to transition your parenting style from one season to the nextWhy behavior modification is not a healthy basis for building lasting relationships with your kidsHow to cultivate an environment that will encourage kids to talk to youWhy your marriage is important for your parenting and practical ways to strengthen your marriageWant to dig deeper? Check out these resources mentioned in the episode:Use THIS LINK for $10 off your first Crunchi orderSandra's bookSandra's websiteSandra's IG: @sandrawstanley
Sandra Stanley has been in ministry with her husband Andy at North Point Church since 1995. They have led movements, raised kids, and created a platform that speaks out for the local church. In our conversation we talk about what it means to raise the next generation, how to parent with the relationship in mind, and keeping your kids in the local church. https://northpoint.org/resources https://www.sandrastanley.com/ https://andystanley.com/ https://www.instagram.com/sandrawstanley/ Links: Follow 2 Lead Coaching https://www.follow2leadcoaching.com/ Spirit and Truth Substack https://spiritandtruth.substack.com/ Tony on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/twmilt/ Be sure to leave us a review on Apple Podcasts https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/reclamation-podcast-reclaiming-good-practices-for-following/id1429933082
Hey friends! Today I had the honor of speaking with a woman I've admired for so long over my years of attending Buckhead Church. She's a mom of three beautiful children, Co-Founder of NorthPoint Ministries, and leader of Fostering Together- NPM's fostering care initiative. In this episode you'll learn - how the principles in Sandra and Andy's book “Parenting: Getting It Right” apply to people of all ages - practically resist the current of culture - strengthen and develop your self control muscle - understand WHY it's important to cast a vision for your relationships (self, others, Creator) - practical conversation tactics to help forgive in hard conversations
Wowie Wow 4 years, over 400K downloads, 159 episodes and here are your top 5 most downloaded on the Truth for your Twenties Podcast: P0rn, Let's talk bout it. 20-year-old Cassidy Brown Struggled silently with a porn addiction since the age of TEN. Now that she has become free from the addiction she speaks openly on social media and helps others break free too! Thanks to an Instagram video with nearly 7 million views promoting this conversation, this episode has nearly 17K listens! 10,000 more than our runner-up episode. Cassidy's Ministry Link to her full episode Love After you have been hurt. Author of "love has a name" Adam Weber and I are chatting about what it looks like to love after you have been hurt, love when you are scared, and the freedom that comes if we can do this thing well. Link to the full episode $$ in all stages of your twenties. My husband, the former director of financial wellness at the university level is the wisest person I know when it comes to handling money. He was not taught this growing up but he has learned a lot on the way. Link to the full episode and the tiktok video that blew this episode up. The relationship with your parents now that you are a "grown up". My interview with someone I have looked up to for years, Sandra Stanley and her new book. "Parenting Getting it right. Link to the full episode The Sunshine Mind Raquelle Stevens appears alongside Selena Gomez, as part of her inner circle, in My Mind & Me as well as Selena+Chef on HBO. Tanya Rad is co-host of On Air with Ryan Seacrest. Both Tanya and Raquelle have popular podcasts: Scrubbing In and Giving Back Generation. In their debut book, the are sharing a message of hope and tips on how to build a “sunshine mindset,” Link to the full episode. Get 20% off when you go to LIQUIDIV.COM and use code Truth at checkout. Follow Katie on Instagram and TikTok Katie's new online course. Use promo code truth to save $20 Join the Truth for your Twenties Facebook group
You don't have to constantly doubt if you're getting it right as a parent. Start here and feel confident about raising a healthy and happy family. Please welcome Sandra Stanley to Mountaintop! Whether you're sleep deprived with a colicky newborn or navigating the emotional roller coaster of a teenager, parenting has its ups and downs, its confusion and clarity, its big blowups and small victories. And no matter our family makeup or our children's personalities, many of us experience anxiety over our children's futures and often fear making a mistake. Andy and Sandra Stanley are no strangers to this feeling. As parents of three grown children and cofounders of North Point Ministries, they are seasoned experts on faith and parenting. Together they have spent decades counseling countless families, mentoring others, and learning from mentors of their own, all while leading one of the largest churches in the country. In Parenting: Getting It Right, Andy and Sandra combine their experience and wisdom into a guide that helps readers understand and live by essential parenting principles. Learn more about Mountaintop at https://mountaintopchurch.com
Sandra Stanley joins me to share how choosing your it can improve our parenting. Connect with Sandra on Instagram. Get your copy of Parenting: Getting It Right. I Choose My Best Life Podcast is one of the Top 20 Christian Women Podcasts I Choose My Best Life Books: Colorful Connections, Sacred Rest, Come Empty, Set Free to Live Free Connect with Saundra: Twitter: @DrDaltonSmith Pinterest: https://www.pinterest.com/drdaltonsmith Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/DrSaundraDaltonSmith
It's been said that parenting is a lifelong job that doesn't end when your children grow up. Our guests this week know firsthand how hard it is to be a parent, and they've done the work to build the kind of relationship with their children that is returning dividends in their adulthood. And now, their kids really appreciate them as people, and the influence they've had in helping them become who they are today. Dionne Warwick is a six-time Grammy Award-winning singer who raised her son Damon—who is also a musician—as a single mother. Despite her status as an international superstar, Dionne made it a priority to carve out meaningful moments with her children. Andy and Sandra Stanley are preachers, authors, and parents of three. One of their greatest prayers was that their relationship with their kids would evolve into a friendship and that as adults, they'd still appreciate their family time. Links, Products, and Resources Mentioned: Jesus Calling Podcast Jesus Calling Jesus Always Jesus Listens Past interview: Reba McEntire and her sisters, Susie and Alice Upcoming interview: Curtis Chang Dionne Warwick Gospelaires Hal David Billy Ray Cyrus Dolly Parton “Peace Like A River” - song with Dionne Warwick & Dolly Parton Andy and Sandra Stanley North Point Ministries Enneagram The 5 Love Languages Dr. Charles Stanley Parenting: Getting It Right - book by Andy & Sandra Stanley Interview Quotes: “One of the greatest things that I've learned is just to truly be who I am.” - Damon Elliott “All the things that [God] does for me, I am truly thankful and grateful for. He's given me a path to follow and a plan He has for me. And I'm following that plan and that path. So whatever comes within the realm of that, I'm supposed to face. I have no problem with that.” - Dionne Warwick “We prayed with our kids at night when they were young, but we continued to pray with them through every season of life.” - Andy Stanley “Our parenting goal with our kids was to end up with kids who wanted to be with us and with each other, when they no longer had to be.” - Sandra Stanley ________________________ Enjoy watching these additional videos from Jesus Calling YouTube channel! Audio Episodes: https://bit.ly/3zvjbK7 Bonus Podcasts: https://bit.ly/3vfLlGw Jesus Listens: Stories of Prayer: https://bit.ly/3Sd0a6C Peace for Everyday Life: https://bit.ly/3zzwFoj Peace in Uncertain Times: https://bit.ly/3cHfB6u What's Good? https://bit.ly/3vc2cKj Enneagram: https://bit.ly/3hzRCCY ________________________ Connect with Jesus Calling Instagram Facebook Twitter Pinterest YouTube Website
Let's be honest, parenting can be rough! Kids don't exactly come with a user's manual, although many probably wish they did… Luckily for us, today's Still Coloring guest, Sandra Stanley, breaks down everything from the different stages of parenting to what it means to parent while prioritizing the relationship. She covers it all in her and her husband, Andy's, newest book, Parenting: Getting It Right. Get cozy with Toni + Sandra as they speak honestly and practically about how parenting can be easier and why it matters so much!Links:Order NEW Book: Parenting: Getting It RightLinks to connect with Sandra: InstagramWebsite: https://www.sandrastanley.com/Links to connect with Toni: Personal Instagram | Broken Crayons Instagram | FacebookWebsite: https://www.tonijcollier.com/ Want to partner with Toni or advertise on the podcast? Reach out here.Purchase Toni's Book: Brave Enough to be Broken
Am I getting parenting right? This is a question Most parents at all stages find themselves asking. Well, thanks to Andy and Sandra Stanley's extensive experience and teaching on the subject of parenting at different stages, you now have an incredible resource available. Their first book together: Parenting – Doing IT right, is now available and is an outstanding resource for parents.In our interview, we talked about the challenges and rewards of parenting with the relationship with our children in mind. You will be blessed by their incredible insights. The Stanleys a giving away a copy of their book to one of my listeners. Just take a moment to share this interview on social media and tag me for a chance to win. Visit https://andystanley.com/ to find out more about Andy Stanley's ministry and the new book.To read Patricia's column for The Atlanta Journal-Constitution about the subject, visit: https://wp.me/p7aKvF-227You can watch this interview on YouTube: https://youtu.be/D5MW54gtucsSupport the showClick on the link above to support us and help keep this show going!Click on the links to connect with Patricia on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn, YouTube
What are your parenting goals? What does a “win” look like for you? Andy and Sandra Stanley determined years ago that their primary goal as parents was to build strong, healthy relationships with their children that continue into their adulthood. “Our legacy is the relationships, the health of the relationships, and the healthy people in the relationships we leave behind,” says Sandra. “We wanted to lay a foundation for our kids early of understanding that life is relationships. And, we wanted them to understand how to restore a broken relationship.” This week, Andy and Sandra join me to discuss their latest book, Parenting: Getting It Right, and we share an honest conversation about the importance of intentional parenting, equipping our kids for relational success, and the art of restoring a broken relationship. ---- Communicator, author, and pastor Andy Stanley founded Atlanta-based North Point Ministries (NPM) in 1995. As host of Your Move with Andy Stanley, which delivers over 10.5 million messages each month through television, digital platforms, and podcasts, and author of more than 20 books, Andy is considered one of the most influential pastors in America. Sandra Stanley received her bachelor of science degree from Georgia Tech and master of arts from Dallas Theological Seminary. Sandra has a heart for foster kids and foster families, as she and Andy have been foster parents since 2010. Her ministry passion is promoting foster care in the local church. Much of her time these days is spent working on various writing projects and continuing her involvement with Fostering Together, the foster care initiative at North Point Ministries. In their new book, Parenting: Getting It Right, Andy and Sandra combine their experience and wisdom into a guide that helps readers understand and live by essential parenting principles. Visit Andy's website and Sandra's website to learn more about both of them and their new book.
Sandra Stanley is joining me on The Christian Parenting Podcast and you are going to love her! Sandra is wife to Pastor Andy Stanley, mom of three adult kids, a brand new grandma, and co-author of the book Parenting: Getting It Right, which she wrote with her husband! As a mom of grown kids, Sandra is familiar with all the highs and lows of parenting kids in all stages! Today we talk about what it means to parent with the relationship in mind, the various stages of parenting and now to be intentional as you move through each stage. Sandra has so much wisdom to share, you do not want to miss this episode! Connect with Sandra Website: https://www.sandrastanley.com/ Instagram: @sandrawstanley Links Mentioned https://andystanley.com/parenting/ The Christian Parenting Podcast is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. To find practical and spiritual advice to help you grow into the parent you want to be visit www.ChristianParenting.orgOur Sponsors:* Check out HelloFresh: https://www.hellofresh.com/Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy
As parents, it's easy to wonder, Am I doing this right?With three adult children and years of student and college ministry under their belts, pastor and author Andy Stanley and his wife, Sandra, know a thing or two about parenting. Before they even started a family of their own, they made a decision: to pursue a family dynamic where everyone would want to hang out with each other even when they didn't have to. From there started a journey of parenting through the lenses of building lasting relationships. For parents at any stage, this episode will give you practical tools for getting the whole parenting thing right.Related Resources:- Grab a copy of the Stanleys' new book, Parenting: Getting It Right, today!- Do you ever struggle trusting God with your kids? You aren't alone. That's why Lysa TerKeurst put together "15 Prayers for Your Son" and "15 Prayers for Your Daughter." These resources will help you fight for the heart of your son or daughter through Scripture-based prayers. We pray these resources will help you in your journey of learning to trust the Lord with your kids. Click here to download now!- Click here to download a transcript of this episode.
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Sandra Stanley joins us to talk about her 30-year parenting journey with husband, Andy, how they determined their "IT" in parenting, and how they chose to parent in order to prioritize their "IT." Our convers, ation covers parenting with the relationship in mind, getting interested in what your kids are interested in, and the power of support in your parenting journey. This is a "don't miss" conversation! Show NotesFor more information about MOPS International, go to www.mops.org.Find a MOPS group: https://www.mops.org/groupsearch/index.php.Start a MOPS group: https://www.mops.org/start-a-group/.Connect with Sandra through her website www.sandrastanley.com or on Facebook sandra.w.stanley, Twitter @sandrawstanley, Instagram @sandrawstanleyBooks by Andy and Sandra Stanley, Parenting: Getting IT Right on Amazon.Mentioned: Kathleen Edelman's I Said This, You Heard That - Workbook
Join us as we have our first official guest interview with Sandra Stanley. Sandra was introduced to the For the Family book many years ago and has utilized it greatly to pray for her family in many ways. Sandra and her husband, Andy, have just released a book called, Parenting, that we discuss with her as well. It's a fun conversation that will encourage you in many ways.
Am I getting parenting right? Most parents at any and every stage, find themselves asking this question. Whether you're sleep deprived with a colicky newborn or navigating the emotional roller coaster of a teenager, parenting has its ups and downs, its confusion and clarity, its big blowups and small victories. And no matter our family makeup or our children's personalities, many of us experience anxiety over our children's futures and often fear making a mistake. Sandra Stanley is no stranger to this feeling. As a parent to three grown children (plus decades counseling countless families and learning from mentors of her own), she happily shares from her experience and wisdom. Today, Sandra joins me to discuss her new book, Parenting: Getting It Right. In this episode you'll hear Sandra's advice for: learning the four distinct stages of parenting, clarifying your primary goal of parenting (and developing a parenting-orientation around that goal), deciding on your non-negotiables and more…-------------------------------Links Discussed in This EpisodeOrder a Copy of Minimalist Moms: Living and Parenting with SimplicityConnect with Sandra:WebsiteInstagramBook: Parenting: Getting It RightShow Notes for Bonus Episode: Finding "It" (An Intentional Parenting Strategy)Enjoy this Podcast?Post a review and share it! If you enjoyed tuning into this podcast, then do not hesitate to write a review. You can also share this with your fellow mothers so that they can be inspired to think more and do with less. Order (or review) my recent book, Minimalist Moms: Living & Parenting With SimplicityQuestions? You can contact me through my website, find me on Instagram, or like The Minimalist Moms Page on Facebook.Thanks for listening! For more updates and episodes, visit the website. You may also tune in on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Google Podcasts, or Stitcher.Checkout the Minimalist Moms Podcast storefront for recommendations from Diane.If you enjoyed today's episode of the Minimalist Moms Podcast, then hit subscribe and share it with your friends!Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/minimalist-moms-podcast2093/exclusive-contentAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands
When I posted to social what topics you want covered more here on the Truth for your Twenties podcast. Several of you mentioned a relationship with your parents as you become an adult. And I can think of no one to unpack this subject better than my personal hero, Sandra Stanley Sandra and her husband Andy co-wrote a new book on parenting and if you have been around here for more than a minute you have probably heard me quote Andy at least a time or two. He is what I believe one of the best communicators of our day founder of Atlanta-based North Point Ministries consisting of a network of 180 churches around the globe that collectively serve over 200,000 people weekly. And the author of the book I recommend almost every day the new rules for love sex and dating. His beautiful wife Sandra went to Georgia Tech and then went on to get her master of arts from Dallas Theological Seminary. Sandra has a heart for foster kids and foster families, as she and Andy have been foster parents since 2010. Together they have raised 3 of their own biological children and just wrote a book called parenting, getting it right. We are chatting about how to parent FOR THE RELATIONSHIP and how to repair it even if you are the child. Sandra Stanley on Instagram Follow Katie on Instagram and TikTok Truth for your Twenties Swag Join the Truth for your Twenties Facebook group
Welcome to Part 2 of our conversation with Andy and Sandra Stanley as we dive further into the topic of parenting. Andy and Sandra explain how we need to keep our parenting focused on the relationships first and foremost, and how they intentionally built that into every aspect of their parenting years - which have now evolved into friendships with their adult children. What do you need to do to ensure your children want to be with you, and each other, even when they no longer have to? In other words, what can you do to help your children love being home?
Am I getting parenting right? Most parents at any and every stage find themselves asking this question. To explore this question, I invited Sandra Stanley to be my guest. Moms you are going to love this episode. Sandra Stanley received her bachelor of science degree from Georgia Tech and master of arts from Dallas Theological Seminary. Sandra has a heart for foster kids and foster families, as she and Andy have been foster parents since 2010. Her ministry passion is promoting foster care in the local church. Much of her time these days is spent working on various writing projects and continuing her involvement with Fostering Together, the foster care initiative at North Point Ministries. Sandra and her husband Andy Stanley just published their new book Parenting Getting It Right which we dive into today. Their it, their north star which we talk a lot about in this show is parenting with the relationship in mind. I couldn't agree more. To connect with Sandra and learn more about her book Parenting: Getting It Right go to https://www.sandrastanley.com/ Connect with Sandra on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/sandrawstanley/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Am I getting parenting right? That's a question that crosses our mind quite often. Which makes anyone who decides to write a book with so bold a title as Parenting: Getting it Right, either have a lot of courage or be out of their mind. Fortunately, Pastor Andy Stanley and his wife Sandra (authors and founders of North Point Ministries), who bravely wrote such a title, have parented successfully! Sandra joins us this week to talk to Josh about their experience as parents of now three grown children.Sandra and Josh talk about:What "it" actually meansThe four seasons of parentingWhy behavior modification is not the goal, but relationship isWays to adapt your words and approach with your kids specific to their personalityHow to reflect Jesus as your kids mirror your behaviorShow Notes:Order a copy of Parenting: Getting It Right:https://andystanley.com/parenting/Watch this epiosde on YouTube:https://www.youtube.com/@FamousatHomepodcastLearn more about Andy and Sandra Stanley:https://andystanley.com/parenting/REGISTER FOR MYKIDSEQ COACHING WORKSHOP: https://www.famousathome.com/kids
Nobody gave you a manual when your child was born, so now what? Today we get some fantastic advice from speakers and authors Andy and Sandra Stanley. They emphasize how every family needs to have a "north star" that guides the family journey. Andy and Sandra, drawing upon their own parenting experience with candid recollections and humor, make a strong case for a "north star" that focuses on the relationship above all. Having been involved with youth and fostering as well, Andy and Sandra are able to distill these concepts for us in their new book Parenting - Getting IT Right - but our conversation was not distilled enough to squeeze it into one episode. So this is part 1! Join us next week for part 2!
On-the-Road Sights - Sherry and the Angels Lifted a Car Over Accident | Italian or Eyetalian? | Sticking Up for "Eyetalian" | Good News - Jill's Getting Sober | It Could Just WORK | Andy and Sandra Stanley - 2 Rules | Jennifer and God's Cookies | Joy Report - Joy of the Lord is Diane's Strength | Elaine's Widow Gift
Hey friend! When it comes to parenting, have you ever wondered if you're getting it right? What does success look like as a parent anyway? If you're a parent, have a parent, or want to be a parent, don't wait to listen to this episode! I had a fantastic conversation with Andy and Sandra Stanley about their new book, Parenting: Getting It Right. With three grown children who love each other and love being together, even now that they no longer have to and can make those decisions for themselves, Andy and Sandra don't hold back on sharing what they've learned in raising their family. Listen in as Andy, Sandra, and I discuss all things parenting, like: How establishing their end goal for raising their children shaped their parenting decisions Why the law of the harvest applies to parenting (and why you can't ignore it!) One of the most important things we can help our kids understand about their behavior Why teaching kids how to repair and restore relationships so is important Andy Stanley is the founder of North Point Ministries, with eight Atlanta-area churches and a network of 180 churches around the world, a gifted communicator, and the author of over 20 books. Sandra Stanley is the author of two devotionals, and she loves speaking and writing about faith, family, and fostering. They have three grown children, whom Sandra homeschooled, and Parenting: Getting It Right is their first book. Favorite quotes: “Your potential relationship with your adult children is much longer than the years or seasons you are in right now. Later is longer and you are sowing now you repent a healthy adult relationship with your kids.” - Andy Stanley “Parenting with that relationship in mind gets us to the finish line.” -Sandra Stanley “We don't have rules just because we want to have rules. We have rules for reasons and to protect relationships. Our consequences for breaking the rules in our home were all tied to restoring the relationship.” -Andy & Sandra Stanley “One of the greatest gifts we can give our children is a healthy marriage.” -Andy Stanley “A great marriage sets our kids up for success in a lot of ways.” -Sandra Stanley Coaching this week: Habits for Moms: all about the power of 1% better and our trajectories. (30:17) Links to great things we discussed: Andy's Website Andy & Sandra's Book - Parenting: Getting It Right The Last Kingdom 1923 Heaven - Bryan Adams This is My Song - North Point Worship Worthy of My Song - Phil Wickham The Ruthless Elimination of Hurry - John Mark Comer When Crickets Cry - Charles Martin How We Got to Now- Steven Johnson From Strength to Strength - Arthur Brook TheraGun Mini Worship for Fierce Faith Join the Confident Motherhood Community here. Hope you loved this episode! Be sure to subscribe in iTunes and slap some stars on a review! :) xo, Alli
Am I getting parenting right? Most parents, at any and every stage, find themselves asking this question. Mike Linch sits down with Andy and Sandra Stanley, co-authors of Parenting: Getting it Right, to dive into a subject all moms and dads encounter challenges in.No matter our family makeup or our children's personalities, many of us experience anxiety over our children's futures and often fear making a mistake. Andy and Sandra Stanley are no strangers to this feeling. As parents of three grown children and cofounders of North Point Ministries, they are seasoned experts on faith and parenting. Together they have spent decades counseling countless families, mentoring others, and learning from mentors of their own, all while leading one of the largest churches in the country.In Parenting: Getting It Right, Andy and Sandra combine their experience and wisdom into a guide that helps readers understand and live by essential parenting principles. In an inviting, conversational approach that is both informative and accessible, the Stanleys help readers understand the most important goal in parenting and learn the steps to pursue it by:- Learning the four distinct stages of parenting- Clarifying the primary goal of parenting and developing a parenting orientation around that goal- Identifying and adapting their approach--not their rules--to their children's distinct personalities- Deciding on their shortlist of non-negotiables and learning to stick to it
Am I getting parenting right? Most parents, at any and every stage, find themselves asking this question. Mike Linch sits down with Andy and Sandra Stanley, co-authors of Parenting: Getting it Right, to dive into a subject all moms and dads encounter challenges in.No matter our family makeup or our children's personalities, many of us experience anxiety over our children's futures and often fear making a mistake. Andy and Sandra Stanley are no strangers to this feeling. As parents of three grown children and cofounders of North Point Ministries, they are seasoned experts on faith and parenting. Together they have spent decades counseling countless families, mentoring others, and learning from mentors of their own, all while leading one of the largest churches in the country.In Parenting: Getting It Right, Andy and Sandra combine their experience and wisdom into a guide that helps readers understand and live by essential parenting principles. In an inviting, conversational approach that is both informative and accessible, the Stanleys help readers understand the most important goal in parenting and learn the steps to pursue it by:- Learning the four distinct stages of parenting- Clarifying the primary goal of parenting and developing a parenting orientation around that goal- Identifying and adapting their approach--not their rules--to their children's distinct personalities- Deciding on their shortlist of non-negotiables and learning to stick to it
Andy Stanley, founder of North Point Ministries in Atlanta, and his wife, Sandra, talk about their new book, Parenting: Getting It Right. They share vision in parenting, the "north star" of parenting, the two rules they focused on while bringing up their children, and why sometimes, it's okay to put some distance between the misbehavior and the actual punishment.
Today we talk with Mike Branton, a father and the Student Ministries Pastor at Sun Valley Church, about cultivating a culture of service in your family. Any loving parent would want their kids to develop strong character traits like selflessness, perseverance, and genuine compassion for others. What better way to grow these traits than through serving within a community?In this installment, Mike and Grant share some practical wisdom from their experience as fathers and from years of serving in youth ministry. One of the primary ways to promote service in our kids is to model it ourselves consistently and be sure to explain why to your kids. Mike does this in many ways, but one way is by creating repeatable slogans within his family. For example, "Brantons put others before us. Brantons show respect in words and actions. Brantons give generously. Brantons listen, trust, and obey. Brantons work hard in all we do. Brantons speak truth."Our encouragement to you is to develop some family mottos for your family. feel free to steal these, adapt them, or start from scratch based on your family values. What's most important is not to lose sight of who you want your kids to become.For more on that, here is a podcast from Andy and Sandra Stanley about Parenting with Vision.And if you are interested in helping Mike and Grant at the Sun Valley Summer Camp, go here to learn more: Sun Valley Summer Camp
Hey! Welcome to my podcast, Can I Laugh on Your Shoulder? (formerly known as Business with Purpose!) I'll be talking with guests each week and having raw, funny, and often brutally honest conversations about the things that matter most in life. My first guest is Sandra Stanley, and we are talking all about parenting. But wait! If you don't have kids, that's OK. We're also talking about conflict resolution, and this is the kind of conversation that I guarantee everybody can get something out of. Sandra is married to Pastor Andy Stanley, and they have three grown children. Sandra is known for her devotional books: "Breathing Room" and "Comparison Trap.” She is also the cofounder of North Point Ministries in Atlanta. She and her husband are releasing a new book, “Parenting: Getting It Right.” 3:22 – Sandra 101 Sandra and Andy have been married 34 years, and all three of their kids are married. Her daughter just had a baby girl, and Sandra is enjoying all the newborn snuggles. Sandra and her husband have been foster parents since 2010. 8:34 – Getting it right Sandra's book doesn't have all the answers for every parenting dilemma. There are no perfect parents. There are no perfect kids. Her “it” was having such a good relationship with her kids that they still wanted to be together when they were adults. 14:36 – Mindset shifts Sandra and her husband made “honor” an important part of their children's relationship. They had to apologize sincerely. “Honor mom” and “Don't tell a lie” were the two big rules in their house. 28:56 – Stages of parenting There are different stages of parenting. From 0 to 5 years old, it's focused on discipline. Five to 10 are training years. From 11 to 18 are the coaching years. 42:51 – Takeaways from the book Sandra wanted to raise kids who were accountable to God and who sought God's will for their lives. Don't make your kids have quiet time with the Lord each morning. But model it, encourage it and make it easy. 50:02 – Good things and hard things Last thing that made her laugh? Hearing her kids laugh with their cousins Last thing that made her cry? Seeing the first picture of her grandchild FEATURED QUOTES What other endorsement do you need if your kids endorse your parenting book? – Sandra We don't have all the answers for all of your parenting dilemmas. There are no perfect parents. There are no perfect kids. – Sandra One of the greatest rewards in this season of life is watching our kids choose each other, like each other and want to be friends. – Sandra We wanted to raise kids who were accountable to God and who sought God's will for their lives. – Sandra CONNECT: https://www.sandrastanley.com/ https://andystanley.com/parenting/
"Am I getting parenting right?" Most parents, at any and every stage, find themselves asking this question. Join host Jerrad Lopes as he sits down with pastor Andy Stanley and his wife Sandra to talk about what it looks like to get it right.
196 Parenting for the Relationship with Sandra Stanley Questions and Topics We Discuss: Will you share the story of how you and Andy arrived at your overall vision and goal for parenting? How does the “law of the harvest” apply to parenting? Will you share your family's personal "keystone habits" you chose to set in place, rather than creating a long list of rules? Sandra Stanley received her bachelor of science degree from Georgia Tech and master of arts from Dallas Theological Seminary. Sandra has a heart for foster kids and foster families, as she and Andy have been foster parents since 2010. Her ministry passion is promoting foster care in the local church. Much of her time these days is spent working on various writing projects and continuing her involvement with Fostering Together, the foster care initiative of North Point Ministries. North Point Community Church Resources Thank You to Our Sponsors: Solid Rock Christian Academy and Chick-fil-A East Peoria Connect with The Savvy Sauce on Facebook or Instagram or Our Website Please help us out by sharing this episode with a friend, leaving a 5-star rating and review, and subscribing to this podcast! Also, check out our Patreon Page to find out how to gain access to additional podcasts and goodies! Gospel Scripture: (all NIV) Romans 3:23 “for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God,” Romans 3:24 “and are justified freely by his grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus.” Romans 3:25 (a) “God presented him as a sacrifice of atonement, through faith in his blood.” Hebrews 9:22 (b) “without the shedding of blood there is no forgiveness.” Romans 5:8 “But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” Romans 5:11 “Not only is this so, but we also rejoice in God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have now received reconciliation.” John 3:16 “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.” Romans 10:9 “That if you confess with your mouth, “Jesus is Lord,” and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved.” Luke 15:10 says “In the same way, I tell you, there is rejoicing in the presence of the angels of God over one sinner who repents.” Romans 8:1 “Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus” Ephesians 1:13–14 “And you also were included in Christ when you heard the word of truth, the gospel of your salvation. Having believed, you were marked in him with a seal, the promised Holy Spirit, who is a deposit guaranteeing our inheritance until the redemption of those who are God's possession- to the praise of his glory.” Ephesians 1:15–23 “For this reason, ever since I heard about your faith in the Lord Jesus and your love for all the saints, I have not stopped giving thanks for you, remembering you in my prayers. I keep asking that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the glorious Father, may give you the spirit of wisdom and revelation, so that you may know him better. I pray also that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you, the riches of his glorious inheritance in the saints, and his incomparably great power for us who believe. That power is like the working of his mighty strength, which he exerted in Christ when he raised him from the dead and seated him at his right hand in the heavenly realms, far above all rule and authority, power and dominion, and every title that can be given, not only in the present age but also in the one to come. And God placed all things under his feet and appointed him to be head over everything for the church, which is his body, the fullness of him who fills everything in every way.” Ephesians 2:8–10 “For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith – and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God – not by works, so that no one can boast. For we are God‘s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.“ Ephesians 2:13 “But now in Christ Jesus you who once were far away have been brought near through the blood of Christ.“ Philippians 1:6 “being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.”
As we're kicking off the new year, it's a perfect time to evaluate what's working well in our parenting, and what may need a few tweaks. It's being intentional in asking God to reveal what he wants our families to be about, and ensuring we're doing the things that will make this happen. Pastor Andy Stanley and his wife Sandra are here to talk about all of this and more. Having grown children, they have an amazing perspective on figuring out what your “it” is in parenting, and charting the course accordingly. I can't tell you how much I love the part of our conversation where we discuss the dangers of letting our ego impact our parenting. And then there is a good reminder that our behavior—not our words—has the greatest impact on our kids. Yikes! Don't miss this and so much more from Andy and Sandra Stanley. Happy New Year! Resources from today's show: Parenting: Getting It Right by Andy and Sandra Stanley
There are a lot of parallels to parenting and leadership, specifically when it comes to wanting to get it right, and defining your “it” is the key to your success. Order your copy of Parenting: Getting It Right: https://bit.ly/3FNPQMY Exclusive access to Session 1 from our video study: https://bit.ly/3Werwuw Download the application guide: https://bit.ly/3VjBzNRSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
The Carey Nieuwhof Leadership Podcast: Lead Like Never Before
In a world with millions of podcasts, it can be hard to listen to the shows that you want or need to keep up with. In this episode, Carey asked some friends to contribute excerpts from their podcast. You'll hear excerpts from seven podcasts featuring insights from Andy and Sandra Stanley, clinical psychologist Mona Delahooke, Jenni Catron and more. Get more on this episode by going to https://careynieuwhof.com/episode542.
Today on The Conversation, Adam is joined by Andy and Sandra Stanley! Andy is a best-selling author, leadership expert, and pastor of an amazing church called Northpoint in Atlanta, Georgia. In today's episode, Andy & Sandra share so much wisdom, specifically about parenting. They share about what guided them in their parenting decisions: that relationship is more important than behavior. For leaders and pastors, Adam and the Stanleys also discuss how to parent your own kids well if you have a position where it feels like other people are watching you and your kids. They also share how to help your kids grow in their faith and relationship with Jesus, and how they've approached their own kids' faith questions & doubtsPre-Order The Stanley's new book, Parenting: Getting It Right, here: https://bit.ly/3P5jIse
Dave Clements, Retail Director for dunnhumby, talks with Sandra Stanley, Chief Data Science Officer, about all things data science - how it can help give retailers and brands a competitive edge, and why it's the 'sexiest job in the world'!
Sandra Stanley shares five wishes she has for all of us. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Sandra Stanley shares five wishes she has for all of us. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Sandra Stanley shares five wishes she has for all of us. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Sandra Stanley shares five wishes she has for all of us. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Sandra Stanley shares five wishes she has for all of us. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Sandra Stanley shares five wishes she has for all of us. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Sandra Stanley shares five wishes she has for all of us.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
In a world that praises and elevates those in power, humility is almost unnatural to us. However, pursuing humility is one of the most important keys to sustaining long-term in ministry. In part two of our "Pastoring Pastors" series, Sandra Stanley joins us to discuss the importance of authenticity, humility, and relationships for the health of our leadership and our souls. For the full episode transcript, links mentioned during the show, and to download the Leader Conversation Guide, visit this episode's Show Notes at theunstuckgroup.com/episode249. Join the Live Conversation on Social Media If you're listening on Wednesday, when the episode first releases, join the live conversation The Unstuck Group's team will be having on social media about this week's topic. We use hashtag #unstuckchurch on Twitter. Or you can join in on Facebook. Ask your questions and add your comments about the topic. If you're catching this episode later, you can still join in! Just tag us @unstuckgroup or use #unstuckchurch, and include [episode 249] in your post for reference.
Welcome back to the kitchen table. This week Bethany sits down with her good friend and mentor Sandra Stanley to begin the conversation about understanding the lie of balance and accepting that as mothers we don't have to do all the things. Sandra shares how she has learned to live with purposeful presence in her seasons with her children and how she has learned to say no confidently. She shares the importance of learning more about the perimeters of your current season of life. Sandra provides wisdom, encouragement, and understanding that God has a perfect plan for each one of us. As featured in today's episode, here are the journal pages to help you identify the lies that you're hearing and change the way you are thinking. https://view.flodesk.com/pages/60d0e421cfb7978901ae2e93 You can also find Bethany on Facebook and Instagram @bethanykimsey to share what your favorite stage with your child is and some great moments you had with them then! Meet Sandra StanleySandra and Andy Stanley founded North Point Ministries in 1995. They've been married 33 years and have three children, ages 28, 27, and 25. Sandra is the author of two women's devotional books with companion videos—Comparison Trap and Breathing Room. Her ministry passion is promoting foster care in the local church. She received her undergraduate degree from Georgia Tech, and a Masters of Biblical Studies from Dallas Theological Seminary. Much of her time these days is spent working on various writing projects, and continuing her involvement with Fostering Together – the foster care initiative at North Point Ministries. sandrastanley.com App Store:Comparison Trap AppBreathing Room App
Welcome to the 25 Days of Christmas! We are counting down to Christmas in festive fashion. Get your free 25 Days of Christmas guide with 10 devotions (for mom and for kids), 10 easy and fun family activities, and 5 ways to serve your community. Week 3 is all about creating a FUN HOME. How can we create a home that our kids want to return home to year after year? My guest Sandra Stanley has three grown kids who love coming home. She's here to help us understand the seasons of parenting better (and leverage them to get closer to our kids). She explains what it means to have a north star as a family (and what hers is). On today's episode, we'll talk about: 3:50 Navigating Christmas with grown kids 7:10 What was your family's north star? 10:20 What are the seasons of parenting? 11:40 The two rules we had at home 15:20 Natural consequences 19:20 How we use our phones to laugh together 24:10 How you talk to adult kids who are not making good decisions. More resources from Sandra Stanley and Arlene Pellicane.
I am so happy to welcome Sandra Stanley back to the show. This is her third appearance on the show and every time, I walk away with so much. If you don't know Sandra, she is the author of The Comparison Trap and Breathing Room. She is married to Andy Stanley and they have grown children. I wanted to have Sandra back leading up to my book launch for A Mother's Guide to Raising Herself because I feel like she has a lot of wisdom to share. This episode is all about parenting. We talk about how parenting produced growth in her. We talk about lessons like connection over efficiency and relationship over rules and honor over obedience. I also ask her to share what helped them build a future relationship with their kids and between the siblings and lastly, how to help our teens make wise choices. I'm telling you, so much good stuff packed into this one episode. You're going to love it! Order Sarah's book, A Mother's Guide to Raising Herself: What Parenting Taught Me About Life, Faith and Myself Check out bonus content from today's episode over on Patreon. Sign up for Sarah's monthly Survival Kit Newsletter Connect with Sarah: Website | Instagram
Welcome back to the kitchen table. This week Bethany sits down with her good friend and mentor Sandra Stanley to begin the conversation about understanding the lie of balance and accepting that as mothers we don't have to do all the things. Sandra shares how she has learned to live with purposeful presence in her seasons with her children and how she has learned to say no confidently. She shares the importance of learning more about the perimeters of your current season of life. Sandra provides wisdom, encouragement, and understanding that God has a perfect plan for each one of us. As featured in today's episode here is a guide to help you identify the lies that you're hearing and change the way you are thinking. https://view.flodesk.com/pages/60d0e421cfb7978901ae2e93 You can also find Bethany on Facebook and Instagram @bethanykimsey to share what your favorite stage with your child is and some great moments you had with them then! Meet Sandra Stanley Sandra and Andy Stanley founded North Point Ministries in 1995. They've been married 33 years and have three children, ages 28, 27, and 25. Sandra is the author of two women's devotional books with companion videos—Comparison Trap and Breathing Room. Her ministry passion is promoting foster care in the local church. She received her undergraduate degree from Georgia Tech, and a Masters of Biblical Studies from Dallas Theological Seminary. Much of her time these days is spent working on various writing projects, and continuing her involvement with Fostering Together – the foster care initiative at North Point Ministries. You can find Sandra:sandrastanley.com App Store:Comparison Trap AppBreathing Room App
Sandra shares stories, experience, tips, and scripture for facing the comparison traps in our lives and our parenting.
Does juggling working from home and homeschooling feel like a LOT right now? Here's some encouragement from Sandra Stanley, wife of Andy Stanley and the author of “Breathing Room”
Sitting down to talk with Sandra Stanley this week was a privilege! She and Andy have journeyed down this road of foster care for the past ten years and have so much wisdom to share because of it. Much like my own story, they became aware of the need to care for children in their own backyard, and this awareness led them to action. We see this all the time at TFI—awareness leads to action. Sandra shares that the road has been bumpy, filled with moments that have left their hearts both broken and encouraged. As foster parents, we come to this journey so hopeful, so ready to help and love, and yet when there is no margin— when the uncertainty overtakes you—it is easy to feel hopeless. Sandra offers hope in our conversation. We can create space in our lives so that we are not overtaken by this hopelessness. We can live and serve with joy.
Today's mother-daughter chat is with Allie and Sandra Stanley on the topic of emotions. Sandra and Andy Stanley founded North Point Ministries in 1995. She is a Georgia native and has lived in the Atlanta area since graduation from Georgia Tech in 1988. Sandra and Andy have been married 31 years and have three children, ages 27, 25, and 23. They also have a daughter-in-law, Danielle, and a 19-year-old foster daughter. Sandra is the author of two women’s studies—Comparison Trap and Breathing Room. Her ministry passion is promoting foster care in the local church. Much of her time these days is spent in seminary classes though Dallas Theological Seminary, working on various writing projects, and continuing her involvement with Fostering Together – the foster care initiative at North Point Ministries. Allie Stanley is originally from Milton, GA and graduated from Auburn University in 2018. She has a passion for serving students and was a middle school small group leader, a Young Life leader, a camp counselor and the Student Coordinator at Auburn Community Church. Allie now works with middle school students at a church in Alpharetta, Ga while she is pursuing a Master’s Degree in Theology from DTS. She has a heart for pouring into younger generations and her prayer is that the Lord uses her to inspire and equip students to be godly young men and women who are passionately pursing the Lord while loving the people around them.
We all have relationships, and we all want them to work. In Part 1 of #Goals, Sandra and Andy Stanley will talk about relationship principles that we can leverage to help us achieve these goals. Subscribe to stay updated with the latest content. Follow Gwinnett Church: YouTube Twitter Instagram Facebook Website
This month, I chose to re-release my first conversation with Sandra Stanley. If you don’t know her, she is an author and wife to pastor Andy Stanley. She is one of the most likable people and this conversation was one of my favorites from the early days. In this episode, she shares all sorts of advice for moms, wives and women in general. Plus, she mentions an item in her survival kit and is now a stable in my wardrobe. The original episode aired in May of 2016 so you may notice a little difference in production quality. I love how far we've come! Here's a link to the original show notes. Come find me on Instagram or Facebook or stop by my website to download FREE planner pages to help you be more efficient and productive with the time you have.
In this episode, Toni talks her involvement in the Breathing Room with Sandra Stanley as well as her personal story of God using her daughter to teach her how God uses our brokenness for His glory which led to her online devotional Broken Crayons. Notes Section: Find and follow Toni Website: http://tonijcollier.com/ Broken Crayons Interactive Devotion http://brkncrayons.com/ Insta @tonijcollier
Raising children is one of the biggest challenges in life. It requires all of our strengths and talents. It makes us keenly aware of our weaknesses. In this message, Andy and Sandra Stanley tell you everything they know about parenting. This isn't everything there is to know, just what they know.
Future Family: Our Way, A Way Andy and Sandra Stanley tell you everything they know about parenting.
Allie Stanley is originally from Milton, GA and graduated from Auburn University this past May. She has a passion for serving students and was a middle school small group leader, a Young Life leader, a camp counselor and the Student Coordinator at Auburn Community Church. Allie now works with college students at a church in Woodstock, Ga while she is pursuing a Master’s Degree in Christian Leadership from DTS. She has a heart for pouring into younger generations and her prayer is that the Lord uses her to inspire and equip students to be godly young men and women who are passionately pursing the Lord while loving the people around them. In this episode, we discuss: - growing up as the daughter of Andy and Sandra Stanley - how to follow God in college - what she appreciated most that her mom did
About Our Guest Sandra Stanley is a Georgia native and has lived in the Atlanta area since graduating from Georgia Tech in 1988. She married Andy that same year and they founded North Point Ministries in 1995. Sandra’s ministry passion is promoting foster care in the local church. Much of her time these days is spent in seminary classes through Dallas Theological Seminary, working on various writing projects, and continuing her involvement with Fostering Together—the foster care initiative at North Point Ministries. Links Sandra's website Breathing Room website Breathing Room on Amazon North Point Community Church Interview Tell people a little about your story. I’m a native Georgian. I met Andy my junior year of college, and this summer we’ll have been married 30 years. We have three kids, and our middle son is married, so we also have a daughter-in-law. We have foster kids in and out of our house, and just got our 18 year old transitioned to an independent living program. So we are empty nesters! What is it like being an empty nester? Being an empty nester is great. I think it hangs its hat on how well you do marriage leading up to those years. But Andy and I still really like each other. You shifted your focus and started writing books. What led to that shift? When our oldest child was in ninth grade, I realized that empty nester-hood was a reality. Sometimes it can feel like a myth, but I realized that there was going to be a next season. I started asking God to give me some direction and wisdom about what was next. God was faithful with baby steps for me having a heart for children who came from hard places. I’m also in seminary now—about halfway through my masters. How do you create breathing room in your marriage? There are so many different seasons—married without kids, married with babies, etc. It looked different for us in each season. When we started North Point Community Church, we had two toddlers and another on the way. During those years, we recognized that it was a tricky, time-consuming season. That’s when Andy started going before the Lord and saying he had 45 hours a week to give. He started going to work at 6:30-7 am so he could be home by 4-5 pm. Talk a little about what breathing room actually is. Breathing room is another way to say margin. We define it as the space between our current pace and our limit. In the study, we talk about developing and maintaining breathing room with our time, finances, and relationships. It started as a sermon series Andy did that really impacted me. I thought it’d be fun to take it and craft it into a series for women. Do you think there's a tension people feel to not disappoint others? We talk about that in the study. Our tendency to not create breathing room boils down to a set of fears—the fear of missing out, the fear of falling behind, the fear of not mattering, and the fear of disappointing people. How did you start saying 'No' to things when you wanted to say 'Yes'? For Andy and I, it was a constant conversation of who or what, in this season, is most important. And once you have those priorities, are those things on the calendar? What impact does a lack of breathing room have on your marriage? A big impact. When we’re too busy, we just lose the connection. I think that’s the case in any relationship. As it relates to marriage in particular, when the calendar fills up the opportunities for intimacy and connect start to go. The urgent can trump the important. It comes back to the constant conversation about how we’re doing. If you see your spouse running out of breathing room, how do you approach that conversation with them? Approach is everything. For different personalities, there are different approaches that are effective. Part of having a great marriage is being a student of your spouse and understanding the best approach/environment to have this conversation. Rather than launching into the question, it’s taking a pause and asking yourself the best approach for the conversation. How does having breathing room set you up for success? That goes back to your own personality and what rejuvenates you. For me, I just need some quiet time. Andy and I are both introverts and we both recharge in the quiet. One of the things that is so important is time alone with the Lord to be part of our regular rhythm. In those moments, God presses the reset button for us. How do we deal with the guilt of saying 'No,' or not doing what all the other parents are doing for their kids? Let me start with an illustration. When our boys were playing baseball, they were on the same team every other season. Andy was coaching one season and in a parent meeting, he let them know that we were going to be on a trip the next weekend. He wanted to know if someone could cover for him. The parents were all shocked to find out that just he and I were going on a trip together. A lot of times, when we take these steps and have breathing room, it gives other people permission to do the same thing. You take that the Lord on your knees and you say 'No' to what you need to say 'No' to. What are some practical ways we can find space for the things we have to do, and still have margin? It goes back to a set of questions you’re asking each other, looking at the calendar, and planning ahead. It may be as simple as looking ahead and saying that in a few weeks you’re getting away together. It may be crazy until then, but you have that set on the calendar. Different seasons are different. There are sometimes problems to solve and other times tensions to manage. In certain seasons, it is what it is and you have to move to the conversation of how to manage the tension. What happens once we finally create the breathing room? There’s peace, which is huge. The Holy Spirit has more ground to manifest the fruits of the spirit for me personally. One of the things that I have seen is the benefit of having breathing room is you can look back at a certain season and not have regrets. Some people have jobs that don't allow them to cut down on their hours. What would you say to them? That really is tough. For someone who is in a place where they can’t establish breathing room, one of the things for them to know is that there really are going to be those seasons. And many times God meets us there. Once you establish that there isn’t a change to be made, then you trust Him to fill in the gaps where you’re lacking. Sometimes it may mean some hard changes—having a conversation with a boss, etc. One Simple Thing Recognize and renew your mind to the fact that a ‘no for now’ is not necessarily a ‘no’ for always. And if you’re so bold, ask your spouse—if you could adjust my schedule any way you wanted, what would that look like? Closing Notes Thanks for joining us for the MarriedPeople Podcast. We hope you’ll subscribe to the podcast on iTunes and leave a review —they help us make the podcast better. You can find Sandra Stanley on her site, Facebook, Instagram and Twitter. And you can check out more about Breathing Room. We want to hear from you! Visit us on Facebook, Instagram or our site and tell us about some things you fill in your breathing room time with! If you want more resources, check out Your Best Us. Finally, we hope you’ll join us for next week’s episode!
Amber Tysl joins me around my kitchen table. Amber is a former teacher who quit her secure job to take over a photography business (which she had no experience in) in order to stay home with her kids. Her husband is a high school basketball coach and they have 3 kids. Amber is someone who sees the beauty in the broken. That is truly a theme in her life. You see beauty that she has created in her home, by her fashion and in her photography. She loves to take was is imperfect and display it as beautiful. We talk about what its like to be a coach’s wife, how she made the decision to leave her secure teaching job, what hospitality looks like for her and how to get the most out of thrift store shopping. Links: Surviving Sarah episode 116 with Sandra Stanley "a problem to be solved or a tension to manage." What Happens When Women Say Yes to God by Lysa TerKeurst Moment app Sponsors: Warby Parker - Go to warbyparker.com/survive to get your FREE Home Try-On Kit today What did you enjoy about this episode? What was your takeaway. Let's continue the conversation on Instagram or Twitter or you can send me an email here. Thank you for following along life with me. I love being apart of your day. And as always, I hope this show helps you survive a little easier.
Oh my word - get ready for a blast hilarity and profound wisdom all wrapped into one package as only Melanie Shankle (bigmama.com blogger, podcaster & NYT best-selling author) can do it. She and Sandra Stanley recently joined us for a SaySomething Girl Talk: - An Evening of Encouragement. The topic? Thriving in the midst of April/May hectic. Well, it's full-on May. Melanie's words are Mary Poppin's spoonful of sugar to help the medicine go down so we don't ever simply endure or let tomorrow's to-dos steal anything from all the GREAT today has in store. Enjoy! Be sure to check out Mel's new book Everyday Holy - SO good! Connect with Melanie at bigmama.com for more on this and her other TERRIFIC projects.
Sandra Stanley, author, blogger, & wife to Andy Stanley (founder of Northpoint Ministries) chats about her latest project Breathing Room - the space between our current pace and our limit. "I can look back to certain seasons of my life, chapters of my life, where I had created & maintained breathing room - and those are the seasons where I have the fewest regrets," Sandra shares. Join us as we learn more about creating and maintaining space - especially during the hectic May days. Connect with Sandra at sandrastanley.com where you can find more information about her latest 28-day devotional Breathing Room as well as her wildly popular 28-day devotional Comparison Trap.
Sandra Stanley joins me again around my kitchen table. She was on the show awhile back—Episode 23—and it has since been one of my most popular conversations with listeners. Sandra is a mother to grown kids, wife to megachurch pastor, Andy Stanley, author, communicator and a woman who is passionate about foster care and coming alongside young mothers. Sandra recently released a devotional called Breathing Room. Do you ever feel like you can’t enjoy anything because you are doing everything? Do you sometimes feel like your pace in life is causing exhaustion? Well, you aren’t alone. In this episode, we talk about what steals our breathing room, how we trade our peace for progress and what role fear plays in it all along with some practical ways to create breathing room in your life today. What did you enjoy about this episode? What was your takeaway. Let's continue the conversation on Instagram or Twitter or you can send me an email here. Be sure check out the show notes for all of my takeaways from our conversation, links to anything we talk about and ways to connect with Sandra. Thank you for following along life with me. I love being apart of your day. And as always, I hope this show helps you survive a little easier.
Welcome to The Messy Table—an ordinary space for real women, imperfect stories, and the God who's at work in our mess. Today, for Episode 25, Amy Groeschel and I are chatting with the absolutely charming Sandra Stanley—who is simply a breath of fresh air. Sandra is the mom of three grown children, wife to Andy Stanley—founder [...] The post EP. 25 | Sandra Stanley [Breathing Room] appeared first on Jenn Jewell.
Sandra Stanley joins Kenny and Elle talk about protecting your family from your youth ministry. [powerpress]
Are we aware we compare? Can contentment (even in the midst of May's banquets, award ceremonies, graduations, summer plans, ... fill in the blank) be as close as a reset? Join us as we carpool chat with Sandra Stanley - author, speaker, mom of 3 grown children and wife of Andy Stanley, founder of North Point Ministries. She’s a foster mom who is learning, stretching, and trying to figure out how to best love on hearts that need healing - including hearts that have been hurt by life's pressures. Let's travel the road toward contentment in the midst of comparison with all the keeping up or trying to get ahead. Maybe we can realized we're in this together and encourage each other rather than compare. SaySomething: a-come-as-you-are vodcast for walking life's roads (relationships, friendship, parenting, hardship, entertainment,...) together. Connect at saysomethingshow.com Connect with Sandra at sandrastanley.com OR comparisontrap.org
Sandra Stanley joins me for Episode 23. She is wife to Pastor Andy Stanley and they live here in the Atlanta area. They have 3 kids--one out of college and two in college. And once they crossed the finish line--the one all parents dream of and became empty nesters--God surprised with them. He led them to become foster parents. I don't know about you, but as a woman I treasure any time that I get to sit at the feet of a woman who is down the road from me. I want to hear about all the things. And this episode is chocked full of great advice. Advice for foster parents, young moms, wives and all women young and old no matter what stage of life. We also talk about her book, The Comparison Trap, along with what it looks like to choose obedience, to live out the fruit of the spirit and to find your worth in something that doesn't change. Plus, you will absolutely love her survival kit.
Andy and Sandra Stanley are two voices we have been grateful for, for a long time! And now we're even more grateful to know and count them as friends. To hear them talk about their journey of parenting, both their biological and their foster children, was truly inspiring. We cannot wait for you to hear this one. And if you haven't already, go grab a copy of their new book, Parenting:Getting It Right.. . . . .Sign up to receive the RBG monthly newsletter to keep up to date with where David and Sissy are speaking, where they are taco'ing, PLUS conversation starters for you and your family to share! Pre-Order the Worry-Free Parent by Sissy!Find us on YouTube!Download a copy of the Raising Boys and Girls Feelings ChartConnect with David, Sissy, and Melissa at raisingboysandgirls.com.. . . . .. . . . .A special thank-you to our sponsors:Boll & Branch: Get 15% off your first order when you use promo code RBG at bollandbranch.com.Sundays - Go to SundaysForDogs.com/RBG or use code RBG at checkout to get 35% off your first order.Hiya Health - Go to hiyahealth.com/RBG and receive 50% off your first order!Lifeway: Use Code RBGCSB at checkout on Lifeway.com for 40% off regular priced CSB Bibles.
The mother-daughter relationship can be the most special bond out there. However, it can also be tough in many seasons. The mother-daughter duo of Sandra Stanley and Allie Stanley Cooney are on the podcast today to give us very practical tips on ways to build, maintain and strengthen our relationships with our daughters.As we think about the mother-daughter relationship, we can often jump to the things we need to add to our plate. We feel guilty that we aren't doing enough. Sandra shares that we may need to actually eliminate things. We may need to limit what we do - to make room for this important relationship. As a mom of daughters, I absolutely loved this chat and it gave me so many great ideas I can still implement in my own home. However, if you have sons, you will still gain some great thoughts on connecting with all of your children.My favorite part of the episode is when Allie shares about her college experience and how she made her faith her own. Her insight was really helpful to me about our kids finding their identity and how they can change from “I have to love Jesus” to “I want to love Jesus.” So many powerful moments from two of my favorite people.In this episode:Creating a safe and loving environment for daughtersHow to pass on an authentic faithHow to show interest in your child's lifeEnjoy!Courtney00:00Introduction and Mother-Daughter Similarities03:50Creating a Safe and Loving Environment for Daughters07:16Passing on Faith: Modeling and Encouraging a Personal Relationship with God16:14Modeling Authentic Faith18:36Personal Faith Journey22:11Staying Stable in Parenting24:12Being Available and Humble28:30Showing Interest in Your Child's Life30:23Adjusting Parenting ApproachesConnect with Pardon The Mess:Christian ParentingPardon The Mess Courtney DeFeoGet your 2024-2025 prayer journal, A Life of FaithResources from today's show:SandraStanley.comAllie Stanley InstagramMeet Me In The Middle - their new bookI Said This, You Heard That - temperament bookParenting book by Andy and Sandra StanleyAllie & Courtney - previous podcast episodeOur Sponsors:* Check out FamilyAlbum: family-album.comPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy