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Sara Dean launched the Shameless Mom Academy to help moms lead more positive, powerful and purposeful lives #everydamnday. Sara is an award winning fitness professional, author, speaker, and transformation coach who spent the last 16+ years serving moms in the fields of psychology, sociology, health…

Sara Dean


    • Jul 4, 2022 LATEST EPISODE
    • weekdays NEW EPISODES
    • 44m AVG DURATION
    • 671 EPISODES

    Listeners of The Shameless Mom Academy that love the show mention: thank you sara, thanks sara, listening to sara, sara dean, sara's podcast, sara s podcast, mama friends, every monday and wednesday, spd, i've been so inspired, imperfectly, sara helps, shamelessly, non moms, braver, imperfect action, selfish, mom and woman, find myself nodding, moms and women.



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    Latest episodes from The Shameless Mom Academy

    664: How to Play the Long Game in Your Advocacy and Activism

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 4, 2022 35:05

    Let your rage be your fuel.   The rage I have carried over the last 6+ or so years has fueled so much of my work. But rage is not a long-term plan.   If you want to show up in advocacy, allyship, and activism you need more than rage. Rage will only take you so far. I want your rage to fuel you - it can be the gas that allows you to keep your foot on the pedal. But, I also want you to be able to sustain the long-term fight that is often required to make change. And that will require more than rage.   In this episode, I walk you through how to let your rage be your fuel while also not letting you get overly caught up in any one moment. The power of pacing yourself in your advocacy, allyship, and activism is what will allow you to stay in the work over the course of the next few decades - and that is what we need from you.  From the moment Roe vs Wade was decided in 1973, people (white men of privilege, to be exact) have been working to overturn it. They have worked on this diligently for 50 years. 50 years! While I don't think it will take 50 years to codify abortion rights, I do believe we have a long haul in front of us. This goes for this fight and so many others.   Advocacy is an ongoing, long-term commitment. In this episode, I talk you through how to stay in this commitment over the long haul as well as how you can take action today.  We can use our rage for good. We can keep showing up, no matter how long it takes. We can get loud. We can get creative and innovative and scrappy AF. We can and will stay in this as long as is required.   Link mentioned: Take my Shameless Summer Survey and win $100 gift card: shamelessmom.com/survey Sponsor info and promo codes: Please find our sponsor information here: shamelessmom.com/sponsor/ Interested in becoming a sponsor of the Shameless Mom Academy? Email our sales team at sales@adalystmedia.com

    663: Amy Shlosberg: Women, Crime, and Our Dysfunctional Criminal Justice System

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 29, 2022 53:46

    Amy Shlosberg, Ph.D , is an Associate Professor of Criminology and Department Chair at Fairleigh Dickinson University where she teaches courses on Wrongful Conviction, Offender Reentry and Reintegration, Race and Crime, Penology, Comparative Justice Systems, Data Analysis and Research Methods. Her primary research focuses on miscarriages of justice, the negative implications of incarceration and issues surrounding reentry, with an emphasis on policy and procedural reform. She is also the co-host of two podcasts: Women & Crime and Direct Appeal   Amy and I connect via Instagram (where all the best relationships are born) and I immediately knew I wanted to have her on the show. The work she is doing in our criminal justice system is so important. And it's so important that all of us US citizens understand the way our system works - and repeatedly fails to work. I learned so much in this conversation and I think you will too.   Listen in to hear Amy share: How she got involved teaching people in prisons and why it lights her up The impact of bringing university students into her prison classroom What inspired her and her podcast co host to create Women & Crime How women can be offenders and victims in our criminal justice system at the same time Her thoughts on whether or not our current criminal justice system works How the culture of poverty impacts our criminal justice system Why people are wrongfully convicted and the role of bias in wrongful convictions The problem with our bail system Why she has hope for our criminal justice system in spite of its current  Links mentioned: Take my Shameless Summer Survey and win $100 gift card: shamelessmom.com/survey Connect with Amy: womenandcrimepodcast.com/ Podcast: Women and Crime Podcast: Direct Appeal  Women and Crime on Instagram and Facebook: @womenandcrimepodcast   Sponsor info and promo codes: Please find our sponsor information here: shamelessmom.com/sponsor/ Interested in becoming a sponsor of the Shameless Mom Academy? Email our sales team at sales@adalystmedia.com

    662: How to Drop the Ball on Purpose

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 27, 2022 38:21

    Every time I've surveyed you all over the last 6 years, you have shared with me that overwhelm is one of your biggest struggles.     I HEAR YOU.     It seems no matter the season of life, if you are parenting, you are overwhelmed. Whether it's the challenge of the constant caregiving logistics, that challenge of the state of the world, the challenge of holding emotional space for your children, or the challenge of trying to find some semblance of your own sense of self in all of this - IT IS A LOT. And it is CONSTANT.    Today, I'm giving you permission to start dropping some balls. Maybe one. Maybe two. Maybe, like 13???     In this episode, I walk you through how to determine which balls to drop and how to restructure time so you can keep the most important balls in the air.     I hope this episode helps you take a close look at what you can let go of in order to make space for more peace, joy and sanity.     Link mentioned: Take my Shameless Summer Survey and win $100 gift card: shamelessmom.com/survey   Sponsor info and promo codes: Please find our sponsor information here: shamelessmom.com/sponsor/ Interested in becoming a sponsor of the Shameless Mom Academy? Email our sales team at sales@adalystmedia.com

    661: Shari Leid: Identity Through Adoption, Internment, Career & Cancer

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 22, 2022 50:09

    Former litigator Shari Leid currently operates An Imperfectly Perfect Life, LLC, a professional mindset coaching business serving clients who are in those tricky middle age years, helping them create the life of their dreams. She is the author of the Friendship Flow transformational book series, which includes The 50/50 Friendship Flow: Life Lessons From and For My Girlfriends and Make Your Mess Your Message - More Life Lessons From and For My Girlfriends. Shari's life has been an incredible journey of identity shifting and identity shaping events that have led her to such a beautiful place of honoring who she is and how she wants to show up in the world and share her life with other women.   Listen in to hear Shari share: Her story of being adopted from Seoul Korea in 1970 in the first wave of international adoptions by Japanese American parents who were interned during WWII Her parent's memories of living and working in internment camps The impacts of her parent's internment on her upbringing How she ended up growing her family by 2 children in less than one year How adopting her daughter brought her full circle in seeing her own adoption journey Her massive shift in identity when she left a career as a litigating attorney to become a stay at home mom - and the major struggle to maintain her sense of self The impact of her physical sense of self as she had double hip replacement from hip dysplasia and double mastectomy after a breast cancer diagnosis Links mentioned: Connect with Shari: animperfectlyperfectlife.com Shari on LinkedIn Shari on IG Shari on FB Shari on YouTube Shari on TikTok Sponsor info and promo codes: Please find our sponsor information here: shamelessmom.com/sponsor/ Interested in becoming a sponsor of the Shameless Mom Academy? Email our sales team at sales@adalystmedia.com

    660: 4 Ways for Moms to Get Across More Finish Lines

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 20, 2022 37:28

    As I've worked with moms over the last 19 (!!) years, I've noticed how quickly society sells us short. And how often we, in turn, sell ourselves short.   I want to invite you to cross more finish lines - BUT - not by working more or working harder. I want you to cross more finish lines, reach more goals, and live more of your dreams by simply owning and honoring who you are, where you've been and how that journey makes you completely magical, uniquely talented, and tough as nails.   Motherhood makes you a better leader, advocate, and citizen. Motherhood allows you to hone skills you never knew you'd need and maybe never wanted - master negotiator, thoughtful persuasionist, quick adaptor, highly efficient productivityist, and intentional & considerate champion of others. Motherhood positions you as an expert and an authority on compassion, connection, and unconditional love.  If you can own and honor these skills, the world opens up for you. But, we aren't taught to own and honor these skills. Let's change that.   In this episode, I'll talk you through 4 ways you can leverage the gifts of motherhood in ways that can be mutually beneficial for you and for the world.  Sponsor info and promo codes: Please find our sponsor information here: shamelessmom.com/sponsor/ Interested in becoming a sponsor of the Shameless Mom Academy? Email our sales team at sales@adalystmedia.com

    659: Jessica Sinarski: How to Own and Embrace Your Anger

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 15, 2022 50:55

    Jessica Sinarski is a highly sought-after therapist, speaker, and change-maker. Extensive post-graduate training and 15+ years as a clinician and educator led her to create the resource and training platform–BraveBrains. She makes brain science practical, helping parents and professionals become healers for hurting children. She is the author of the award-winning Riley the Brave series, Hello, Anger, and more. This is Jessica's third time on the show! Anytime she has a new book, I'm dying to get her back on the SMA. Jessica's ability to help kids and parents understand brain science in order to support emotional management is incredible. I walk away from every conversation with Jessica feeling like I have a ton of new tools to support my child and myself.  Listen in to hear Jessica share: What anger is and why it's so crucial to talk about it now The importance of recognizing anger as a protection mechanism Why we need to recognize that anger is not bad The vicious cycle of anger and shame  How mom overwhelm triggers anger The importance of really accessing our anger and working through it vs avoiding it and stuffing it (which ultimately forces it to show up in dysfunctional ways) How to explicitly ask for help with your anger or shame Why it was important to her to write a book that honors anger, not shut it down Links mentioned: Connect with Jessica: www.bravebrains.com Book Jess: info@bravebrains.com Shop Books: www.rileythebrave.org/bookstorev2 Jessica on IG Jessica on Twitter Jessica on Facebook Sponsor info and promo codes: Please find our sponsor information here: shamelessmom.com/sponsor/ Interested in becoming a sponsor of the Shameless Mom Academy? Email our sales team at sales@adalystmedia.com

    Ep 658: Lessons Learned Co-Chairing the PTA

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 13, 2022 38:22

    I have spent the last year co-chairing the Parent Association at Vinnie's school. I have learned so much from this experience. I've stretched myself in new ways and humbled myself more than once. I've made incredible new friends and led in ways I never saw coming.   You may recall many occasions in which I encouraged moms to “Get off the PTA! Stop volunteering so much!” So, yes, I feel like a bit of a hypocrite sharing my commitment to our school's Parent Association. But hear me out…  While I stand by the fact that moms over give and it's a big problem, I am so grateful for this opportunity to show up and lead in new ways. I believe it has qualified me to lead in other new ways down the road. This role has allowed me to see myself as capable and qualified to do new things in my community that I never previously considered and that feels like a huge win and huge gift.  I'm not at all suggesting that you all go out and become Volunteer of the Year at your kids school. But, if you do choose to step into leadership in your community in a similar way, I think my lessons might help you.  To anyone from Vinnie's school who might tune into this one, thank you for the opportunity to lead in this way and for affording me constant grace. I feel so fortunate to be a part of this community. It has been an honor to serve in this way.  Sponsor info and promo codes: Please find our sponsor information here: shamelessmom.com/sponsor/ Interested in becoming a sponsor of the Shameless Mom Academy? Email our sales team at sales@adalystmedia.com

    Ep 657: Miranda Anderson: Overcoming Perfectionism to Live More Adventurously

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 8, 2022 49:27

    As a speaker, teacher, podcast host and author, Miranda Anderson provides tools and inspiration for women to live a creative, adventurous, and intentional life. Starting out as a lifestyle blogger in 2007, Miranda now offers thousands of weekly listeners of the Live Free Creative podcast something new to think about, feel and DO as they move toward living the life of their dreams. In 2018, she published ‘More Than Enough' to chronicle her family's 12-month no-shopping challenge that both shaped their perspective and family culture, and informed some of her most popular content on sustainability and intentionality. Since then, she's hosted online courses, creative retreats, and in-person workshops in her efforts to help those ‘go-getter at heart' women who feel stuck by circumstances live a life more aligned with their dreams and values. Listen in to hear Miranda share: Her philosophy on “just going for it”, knowing full well she may fail The massive impact of her 12 month no-shopping minimalism challenge, which inspired her book, More Than Enough What she learned about herself and how she learned to listen to her intuition by not buying anything new for herself or her family of 5 for 12 months How the 12 month challenge evolved and inspired her work today How she helps moms adopt a sense of adventure as a mindset Using adventure as a mindset and a lens to creativity, curiosity, connection, calm The difference between perfectionism and striving in how we manage outcomes How moms (especially risk averse or perfectionist moms) can practice being adventurous in low stakes way that can have big impact Links mentioned: Enroll in Momentum Mamas: shamelessmom.com/momentum Connect with Miranda: livefreecreative.co Join Miranda's Grown Up Summer Camp July 14th-17th Miranda's Podcast: Live Free Creative Miranda on Facebook Miranda on Instagram Miranda on Twitter Miranda on YouTube Miranda on Pinterest   Sponsor info and promo codes: Please find our sponsor information here: shamelessmom.com/sponsor/ Interested in becoming a sponsor of the Shameless Mom Academy? Email our sales team at sales@adalystmedia.com

    656: 5 Steps to Push Past the Fear & Noise

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 6, 2022 37:56

    Fear is a beast. Don't get me wrong, fear can be functional. It can protect us from great harm. But, it can also hold us back from taking action. It can paralyze our heads and our hearts. It can prevent us from dreaming, doing, and becoming.   There are some very real reasons to carry fear right now. That will continue to be the case. So, how will you learn to navigate fear and all the internal and external noise that accompanies it? Fear keeps us stuck.  Fear allows our inner critic to grow louder each and every day.  Fear keeps us stuck in inaction.   Right now, we cannot afford to sit in fear.  When we are feeling fear, everything constricts - our ability to see possibility and potential, our ability to be nimble and adaptive, our ability to see what else is true beyond our fear.  In this episode, I walk you through the ways that your fear might show up. Then, I share how to see it, listen to it, and continue to move through it - with it at your side instead of in your driver's seat.  Link mentioned: Enroll in Momentum Mamas: shamelessmom.com/momentum Sponsor info and promo codes: Please find our sponsor information here: shamelessmom.com/sponsor/ Interested in becoming a sponsor of the Shameless Mom Academy? Email our sales team at sales@adalystmedia.com

    655: Piers Kowalski: Shameless Transgender Dad

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 1, 2022 60:27

    Piers Kowalski is an average father of two with a not so average story.   Born and raised in Colorado, Piers lived and worked on the west coast for 11 years before moving back to Colorado with his wife. He started building a career in his dream field of performance psychology, his wife went back to school for nursing, and they had two children. They seemed to be living a typical life. But at the age of 36, Piers was seven years, two kids, and two dogs into marriage when he discovered he was transgender. He was afraid he was going to lose everything and everyone he loved.   On a mission to change the world, Piers shares his story of pain, self-discovery, fear, love, and hope to help others better understand the transgender experience, community, and humanity.   We have had parents of trans kids on the show in the past, but Piers is our first trans parent to come on the show. I am so grateful and honored that he said yes. This was a really special and important conversation. I hope you'll listen and then share it widely. Listen in to hear Piers share: The unexpected process of realizing he was trangender at the age of 36 The choice he had to make to either live with his family as a women - internalizing destructive pain - or take the risk of transitioning to living in his full male identity and potentially lose everything that meant the most to him The social conditioning of shame that creates immense and unnecessary pain for trans people His experience coming out to his mom and where she made missteps out of love that ultimately caused harm Simple steps cisgender people can support transgender people His 4 part advice for parents of a child who identifies as trans/non-binary or who are gender expansive/diverse in their gender identity or expression Links mentioned: Piers's Personal IG Piers's Professional IG   Sponsor info and promo codes: Please find our sponsor information here: shamelessmom.com/sponsor/ Interested in becoming a sponsor of the Shameless Mom Academy? Email our sales team at sales@adalystmedia.com

    654: How to Inspire Someone to Take Action

    Play Episode Listen Later May 30, 2022 40:31

    How do you get people to do what you want them to do? How do you help people make decisions that will benefit them? How do you help people see the potential they have to be leaders, culture shifters, and culture shapers? How do you move people to action? This might sound daunting, I know. But here's the thing… You are already doing this in your parenting. You help your children make decisions. You help your children see their potential. You walk them into opportunities that serve them. You probably also cheer for and champion your partners and friends when they are doing something great.   How can you take the next step to become someone who inspires others to take action, to step into their gifts to lead, to advocate for themselves and others?   You can do this. I'm going to give you 4 steps to do it. 4 steps to inspire your children, partner, parents, friends, and co-workers to become better action takers. Sponsor info and promo codes: Please find our sponsor information here: shamelessmom.com/sponsor/ Interested in becoming a sponsor of the Shameless Mom Academy? Email our sales team at sales@adalystmedia.com

    653: Sonora Jha: How to Raise a Feminist Son

    Play Episode Listen Later May 25, 2022 58:44

    Sonora Jha is the author of the memoir How to Raise a Feminist Son and the novel Foreign. After a career as a journalist covering crime, politics, and culture in India and Singapore, she moved to the United States to earn a Ph.D. in media and public affairs. Sonora's op-eds, essays, and public appearances have featured in the New York Times, on BBC, and elsewhere. She is a professor of journalism and lives in Seattle.   I recently discovered Sonora and her book, How to Raise a Feminist Son, on Instagram. I got her audiobook and was hooked by the end of her introduction. Sonora is a phenomenal storyteller and truth teller. She is a magical combination of professor, comedian and friend as she digs into her life as a single mom who left India to bring her son to Seattle and raise him as a feminist as she built a family around them. I couldn't be more excited and delighted to be sharing her with you all today.  Listen in to hear Sonora share: How her 27 year old son is showing up as an activist for women's rights today What inspired her book, HOW TO RAISE A FEMINIST SON How raising her son in the dark - at the movies - launched her and her son as a family unit into the world How she intentionally built a family around her and her son - that did not include blood relatives Why feminists can and should include men in their activism - and how we might need to check our biases and assumptions that men aren't open to being feminists How she redefined motherhood in order to raise a feminist son Why it is important for men and boys to be intersectional feminists   Links mentioned: Connect with Sonora: sonorajha.com Book: How to Raise a Feminist Son by Sonora Jha Book: Bad Feminist by Roxane Gay Book: Inclusion on Purpose by Ruchika Tulshyan Sonora on Twitter Sonora on Instagram Sonora on Facebook     Sponsor info and promo codes: Please find our sponsor information here: shamelessmom.com/sponsor/ Interested in becoming a sponsor of the Shameless Mom Academy? Email our sales team at sales@adalystmedia.com

    652: Madeline Pratt: Strategizing, Negotiating and Advocating for Your Needs at Work

    Play Episode Listen Later May 23, 2022 54:30

    Madeline Pratt is the founder & CEO of Fearless Foundry, a creative consultancy that supports ambitious humans in building branding, marketing, and business development strategies that allow them to make a meaningful impact in the world. Madeline is an outspoken force for promoting equity, collaboration, and community in business and she spends her time working with clients, creating content, hosting the Finding Fearless podcast, and leading her growing team.    I have had the pleasure of interviewing Madeline as well as being interviewed by her and I can tell you she is the real deal.  She walks the walk and lives the values she has posted on her walls and on social media. It's been awesome getting to know her as we've guested on each other's podcasts!  Listen in to hear Madeline share: Her story of having the rug pulled out from under her in her corporate career How to assess the cost of staying in a position that's not working for you The power and significance of negotiating and advocating for yourself even if you don't get what you want How to assess if a company is aligned with your core values and if they are actively LIVING their core values vs just plastering them on a wall How having to go back to work 2 weeks postpartum fuels her work around parental leave policies How to start building a strategy and plan if you want to make a career change or start your own business Links mentioned: Connect with Madeline: www.fearlessfoundry.com Madeline's podcast: Finding Fearless Madeline's interviewing Sara on Finding Fearless Madeline on IG Fearless Foundry on IG Sponsor info and promo codes: Please find our sponsor information here: shamelessmom.com/sponsor/ Interested in becoming a sponsor of the Shameless Mom Academy? Email our sales team at sales@adalystmedia.com

    651: Luvvie Ajayi Jones: Be a Troublemaker and Raise a Troublemaker

    Play Episode Listen Later May 18, 2022 36:17

    Luvvie Ajayi Jones is a two-time New York Times bestselling author, sought-after speaker, and podcast host who thrives at the intersection of humor, media, and justice. Her critically acclaimed books Professional Troublemaker: The Fear-Fighter Manual (2021) and I'm Judging You: The Do-Better Manual (2016) were instant bestsellers and established her as a literary force with a powerful pen. Her newest book Rising Troublemaker: A Manual for Teens is out NOW! Luvvie is a proud disruptor who has been featured in NPR, Forbes, Inc, Fortune, Chicago Tribune, and more. She has disruptively graced the stages of Google, Facebook, Microsoft, Twitter, and Nike and many more top brands. Her renowned TED talk "Get Comfortable with Being Uncomfortable" has over 8 million views, has been transcribed into 23 languages, and has placed her in the Top 1% of TED Talks of all time. Born in Nigeria, bred in Chicago and comfortable everywhere, Luvvie enjoys laying around in her plush robe, eating a warm bowl of jollof rice in her free time. Her love language is shoes. Listen in to hear Luvvie share: The importance and urgency of showing up in this very moment in history How to be a Troublemaker in ways that are authentic and true to who you are Why you must become a Professional Troublemaker yourself in order to raise a Troublemaker Why Troublemakers need to ask more questions How to circle back on missed chances to speak up The 4 types of Troublemaker 3 things three things Rising Troublemakers can do every day to own your dopeness The domino effect of using your words to have impact Links mentioned: Connect with Luvvie: luvvie.org/ Book: Rising Troublemaker: A Fear-Fighter Manual for Teens  Book: Professional Troublemaker: The Fear-Fighter Manual Podcast: Professional Troublemaker Luvvie's Community: LuvvNation Luvvie's Blog: https://awesomelyluvvie.com/ Luvvie on Social Media: @luvvie on all platforms Sponsor info and promo codes: Please find our sponsor information here: shamelessmom.com/sponsor/ Interested in becoming a sponsor of the Shameless Mom Academy? Email our sales team at sales@adalystmedia.com

    650: 3 Steps to Build Your Summer Bucket List

    Play Episode Listen Later May 16, 2022 38:04

    For a few years now I have walked you all through building Summer Bucket Lists. I love that a number of you have taken on this tradition with your families. It is such a fun and meaningful tradition.   When I told Vinnie I was going to record an episode on Summer Bucket Lists, he lit up. “Mom, it's time to make ours!!” I asked him if he had any advice for all the Shameless Moms who are getting ready to make their Summer Bucket Lists and he told me, “You should put a lot of fun things on your list.”   So, FUN is the official #1 rule of Summer Bucket Lists.  In this episode I walk you through why Summer Bucket Lists are so special and meaningful as a family tradition. Then, I share a few (very loose) rules for building your Summer Bucket List. Lastly, I give you 3 steps/categories to use when creating your Summer Bucket Lists: Old Traditions New Adventures Soul Nourishment (This one is just for you, mama. You're welcome.) After you listen to this episode, please create your Summer Bucket Lists and share them to inspire other mamas to make theirs. And make sure to tag me @shamelessmomacademy so I can see all the FUN you are planning this summer. (Don't forget the FUN.) Sponsor info and promo codes: Please find our sponsor information here: shamelessmom.com/sponsor/ Interested in becoming a sponsor of the Shameless Mom Academy? Email our sales team at sales@adalystmedia.com

    649: Neill Williams: How to Flip Your Mindset Around Productivity

    Play Episode Listen Later May 11, 2022 48:24

    Neill Williams is a Master Certified Life and Productivity Coach, host of “The Unbusy Your Life” podcast, and creator of the Unbusy Entrepreneur Mastermind. Only after ditching her own belief that success was measured by the number of hours worked was Neill able to achieve true lifestyle freedom while juggling her roles as a mom, wife, Master Certified Coach, entrepreneur and employee. Now, she helps too busy high-achieving online entrepreneurs simplify their schedules to 30 hours or less for more time and lifestyle freedom. Listen in to hear Neill share: How she scaled her corporate job from 60 hours a week to 30 hours a week Why she set a goal to quit working overtime hours after proudly being the employee with the most overtime hours for a long time How to negotiate cutting work hours without cutting your salary The two questions you should ask if you want to work fewer hours The powerful difference between making a To Do List vs a Done List How to shift your mindset around productivity and what you can get done in shorter time frames Why she thinks “productivity” is an outdated concept that needs to be rethought Why scheduling is a self care tool How traditional jobs reinforce mom guilt and unnecessary busyness - and how the pandemic massively compounded this How to catch yourself when you're worrying about someone's reactions to you Links mentioned: Connect with Neill: neillwilliams.com Neill's podcast: Unbusy Your Life Neill on IG Neill on FB Sponsor info and promo codes: Please find our sponsor information here: shamelessmom.com/sponsor/ Interested in becoming a sponsor of the Shameless Mom Academy? Email our sales team at sales@adalystmedia.com

    648: My 3 Mother's Day Gifts to You

    Play Episode Listen Later May 9, 2022 35:16

    I started dreaming up this episode last Sunday. The next day, the Supreme Court was outed on their plan to own our bodies. The next day, our family was hit with Covid.   By the time I sat down to record this, what I wanted to say shifted quite a bit. I was seeing this conversation through a totally different lens.   As you listen in, I want you to deeply understand how to honor yourself as well as how to keep showing up for the hard stuff - the stuff that is so critically important in our world right now. This episode gives you permission and guidance on how to do both.   In honor of Mother's Day, let me confirm for you that you are an excellent mother. Full stop. And here are a few gifts I share with you, as you hold space for your excellence: You don't owe anyone anything Your world can suck and be great simultaneously The little ways you show up in the world are making a difference BONUS - you gotta listen in for this one. (And it's my favorite one!) Sponsor info and promo codes: Please find our sponsor information here: shamelessmom.com/sponsor/ Interested in becoming a sponsor of the Shameless Mom Academy? Email our sales team at sales@adalystmedia.com

    647: Leah Carey: Good Girls Talk About Sex

    Play Episode Listen Later May 4, 2022 60:05

    Leah Carey is a sex and intimacy coach and host of the podcast “Good Girls Talk About Sex.” She works with people eager to explore new avenues of their sexuality and fulfill their greatest desires, like: diving back into the dating pool after a long time away, having first-time queer experiences, investigating consensual non-monogamy, or learning how to communicate about kink.   This work was not an obvious life choice for Leah. Growing up with an abusive father, she learned to be a VERY “good girl.”   She got involved in a series of emotionally abusive relationships, always convinced that SHE was the problem – not pretty enough, smart enough, or sexually skilled enough. And because she wasn't having pleasure during sex, so she was convinced she was broken.   At age 42, life threw Leah an opportunity to build a new story: with both parents gone and no siblings, she could put aside the family mythology of the “good girl.”   She began challenging her old beliefs about worthiness, attractiveness, and desirability. Watching her phenomenal growth, friends started seeking her out to help them do the same.   Today, Leah works with women JUST LIKE YOU to reflect their true sexual nature back to them, without the judgment, shame, or fear that can get in the way of seeing it for themselves. Listen in to hear Leah share: How growing up in an alcoholic and abusive household shaped her sexual identity The challenge of healing trauma and overcoming sexual repression while her parents were still alive The road trip that led her on her journey of sexual awakening How her work with a sex worker was so healing and transformational How going to a sex resort and not having any sex completely changed her relationship with her body for the better Why connection and safety must trump sex even in trusted long term relationships Why libido is likely not the issue holding back sex & intimacy in your life Why moms are “touched out” and what to do about it The current cultural shift in acceptance and normalization of sexual identities, practices and frameworks   Links mentioned: Connect with Leah: LeahCarey.com Leah's podcast Good Girls Talk About Sex: GoodGirlsTalk.com Leah on Instagram Leah on Twitter Leah on YouTube   Sponsor info and promo codes: Please find our sponsor information here: shamelessmom.com/sponsor/ Interested in becoming a sponsor of the Shameless Mom Academy? Email our sales team at sales@adalystmedia.com

    646: 3 Things I Didn't Know I Desperately Needed on Vacation

    Play Episode Listen Later May 2, 2022 35:48

    Last week we went on the spring break trip we had been planning for 4 years. We started planning this trip well before the pandemic hit and then had to cancel it and wait. And wait. And wait.   Over the last 2 years, we have done a decent job of taking time as a family to get away in ways that felt safe(ish). Things like road trips and camping trips. And these have all been great. But we were definitely missing bigger vacations and longer getaways to places further from home.   Last week, we spent a week on the tiny island of Isla Mujeres, just off the coast of Cancun, Mexico. It was the dreamiest trip (in spite of me completely throwing my back on Day 2.) The trip was dreamy because of its natural beauty - white sand beaches and the lightest turquoise water - but also because of how we managed the trip.   In this episode, I share 3 things that made this trip exactly the respite I didn't know I desperately needed. I hope these 3 things inspire you to take a vacation this summer - in whatever way is accessible to you. I'm guessing you need a break - perhaps desperately so. You might not even realize how badly you need it. I certainly didn't.   Listen in for some serious vacay inspo!  Sponsor info and promo codes: Please find our sponsor information here: shamelessmom.com/sponsor/ Interested in becoming a sponsor of the Shameless Mom Academy? Email our sales team at sales@adalystmedia.com

    645: Amy Green Smith: How to Walk Through Hard Conversations

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 27, 2022 49:59

    Amy Green Smith is a certified and credentialed life coach and hypnotherapist, masterful speaker, and personal empowerment expert. Amy uses her roles as coach, writer, podcaster, and speaker to move individuals to a place of radical personal empowerment and self-worth. With acute focus on helping people “find their voice”, she is highly sought after for her uncommon style of irreverence, wisdom, and humor and has been a featured expert in Inspired Coach Magazine and on Fox 5 San Diego. Amy and I were connected by our mutual friend - SHOUT OUT to Andrea Owen - who suspected we might hit it off. Well, we totally hit it off. I could have talked to Amy for days. Amy's energy is infectious. The language in this episode matches the energy, so we have labeled this interview explicit. Hold on because you are in for a fantastic conversation.  Listen in to hear Amy share: About her unexpected relationship with Eminem and cross stitch The story of finding her voice and her confidence after growing up in an extremely conservative evangelical family What happens if a person is emotionally flooded in a heated conversation How to use a bridge statement in a hard conversation How to use conversational consent in your conversation Why “You are responsible for your intention, not your reception” in conversations, situations and relationships Why people will not listen to other people if they don't feel understood What a boundary hangover looks and feels like The defense mechanism of fawning that kept us safe when we were young, but has turned women into massive people pleasers What happens when self-help goes wrong Links mentioned: Connect with Amy: amygreensmith.com Amy's Podcast: The Bold Faced Truth Amy on Instagram Amy on Facebook Amy on Twitter Sponsor info and promo codes: Please find our sponsor information here: shamelessmom.com/sponsor/ Interested in becoming a sponsor of the Shameless Mom Academy? Email our sales team at sales@adalystmedia.com

    Ep 644: Sarah Walton: How to Identify and Overcome High Functioning Co-Dependency

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 25, 2022 56:43

    Sarah Walton is a business mentor who's been featured on The Today Show, speaks at women's conferences all over the world, and has helped hundreds of women start and grow businesses they LOVE. Originally from Salt Lake City, Sarah spent her 15-year corporate career in New York City, navigating the male-dominated world of tech, managing a P&L worth hundreds of millions of dollars, working closely with Marianne Williamson, mentoring dozens of women, and balancing motherhood at the same time. She's the voice behind the Game On Girlfriend Podcast, and she's known for her weekly "Sarah Uncut" TV show on YouTube and LIVE "Coffee With Coach" streaming video conversations on Monday mornings. When Sarah and I first started talking about things we could talk about on the show, she casually mentioned “high functioning co-dependency” and I immediately stopped her and exclaimed, “THAT'S IT.” There is quite possibly nothing my audience needs more. And, full disclosure… I knew I would benefit from this conversation too - and I did!! For better or worse, if you're a high functioning, overachiever, people pleaser kinda person, I think you'll learn a lot about yourself in this episode.   Listen in to hear Sarah share: Her Grocery Store story that began her season of being a high-functioning co-dependence daughter  Why women are so high functioning and how this leads us to codependency What keeps us locked into high-functioning codependency habits The one question to ask yourself if you think you're trapped in codependent habits The devastating role of self betrayal in codependency Dig into my own examples of high functioning codependency - yikes…… Why we, as women, are so reluctant to self-promote ourselves and market our brilliance   Links mentioned: Connect with Sarah: sarahwalton.com Sarah Uncut on Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/c/SarahWalton1 Podcast: Game On Girlfriend Book: The Gift of Failure Sarah on IG Sarah on FB Sponsor info and promo codes: Please find our sponsor information here: shamelessmom.com/sponsor/ Interested in becoming a sponsor of the Shameless Mom Academy? Email our sales team at sales@adalystmedia.com

    643: Nana Eyeson-Akiwowo: Overcoming the Societal Neglect of Moms in Their 4th Trimester

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 20, 2022 55:56

    Nana Eyeson-Akiwowo the co-founder of Fourth Phase aftercare boxes that support women in their 4th Trimester after giving birth. She is a social entrepreneur and seasoned humanitarian with a strong commitment to advocating adequate and accessible health care for all under-resourced women, children, and families. Fifteen years prior, after her dad suffered a heart attack in Ghana, Nana founded African Health Now (AHN), a global public health organization, to provide information and access to primary and maternity health care to women, children, and families living across Sub-Saharan Africa. To date, her work with AHN has serviced over 30,000 people in Ghana and Nigeria who are in need of basic health services readily available in America. Before AHN and entering the world of non-profit work, Nana had a successful career in media, working for women's titles such as Honey, Suede, Essence, and Seventeen. Over the years, she has been repeatedly recognized for her philanthropic efforts, garnering multiple global awards.   Nana speaks English and Twi, the latter a language native to Ghana. She and her husband are the proud parents of a beautiful, eight-year-old girl. When she's not working on Fourth Phase, she is in DIY heaven making balloon garlands, resurfacing furniture, and watching HGTV.   I immediately hit it off with Nana and want to go do DIY HGTV projects with her now! This conversation is as real and raw as they come. If your entrance into motherhood was not the stuff Instagram photos are made of, you will be able to deeply relate to Nana.   Listen in to hear Nana share: Her journey into motherhood that defied every Instagram photo she had ever seen How her non profit in Ghana inspired her work in maternal health care globally How “fourth trimester” got added to the dictionary and why this is so important What the fourth trimester is in definition  The massive gap of care for moms in the year after they give birth The missions of Fourth Phase as a social impact maternal wellness brand that helps moms heal, feel, be heard in their 4th trimester How Black moms are treated differently during and after childbirth  How she courted her co-founder, Marcia Cole, and how they started Fourth Phase as a team Links mentioned: Shop Fourth Phase: fourthphasebox.com Fourth Phase on IG Nana on IG Sponsor info and promo codes: Please find our sponsor information here: shamelessmom.com/sponsor/

    642: 3 Simple Steps to Loving What You Already Have

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 18, 2022 34:34

    We all have days and seasons where we look around and think things like: “Why is it so easy for everyone else?” “If only I had what she has!” “Why can't I catch any breaks right now?!” We look into other people's apparently bright & lucious lives and feel twinges of envy, if not downright jealousy.   It happens to me, too. Trust me.   All of my childhood and youth I was surrounded by kids and families that had a lot more than me (materially, at least) and I spent so much time dreaming about what it must be like to live such a plentiful life.   What I've learned over the years is that everyone has more than me and no one has more than me. It all depends on how I want to look at my life on any given day.   In this episode, I walk you through 3 simple steps to loving what you already have so you can stop finding yourself in those moments of compare & despair and start finding moments of abundance, joy and MAGIC at every turn.   Sponsor info and promo codes: Please find our sponsor information here: shamelessmom.com/sponsor/ Interested in becoming a sponsor of the Shameless Mom Academy? Email our sales team at sales@adalystmedia.com

    641: Cara Harvey: How to Be More Productive & Present and Prevent Burnout

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 13, 2022 53:50

    Cara is a Shameless Mom and Stepmom of 3.  She works as a productivity coach and her mission is to help busy moms take massive action on their goals and 3x their productivity without overwhelm or burnout. . She does this via her blog, her wildly popular podcast - The Purpose Driven Mom Show, virtual community groups, and e-courses that help women learn to prioritize their lives!     Cara came on the show to talk about some of the most common struggles for moms: productivity, being present and preventing burnout. She has great tips on building micropriorities in order to stay in momentum and prevent losing motivation in your life.   Listen in to hear Cara share: Why she left her teaching career and what inspired her current career Her journey from building a 6 figure business to having to visit the food bank to feed her family What it looked like to lose so much while managing her Postpartum Depression, Postpartum Anxiety and rage The mindset shift that allowed her to build A Purpose Driven Mom How to use seasonal productivity to organize your life How to ID the season you are in in life in order to give yourself permission to be present in any season and appreciate it for what it is The 4 microseasons to prevent burnout How to use microproirities to reach your goals The problem with simply relying on motivation to accomplish things Her 15 Minutes Formula and the magical power of only 15 minutes Links mentioned: Connect with Cara: apurposedrivenmom.com Cara on IG Cara on FB Get Cara's 15 Minute Formula: the15minuteformula.com/free Sponsor info and promo codes: Please find our sponsor information here: shamelessmom.com/sponsor/ Interested in becoming a sponsor of the Shameless Mom Academy?  Email our sales team at sales@adalystmedia.com  

    640: How to Find Your People

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 11, 2022 37:33

    One of the most common struggles moms share with me is finding other mom friends. Making friends as a grown-up is so tricky. It can take a lot of time and energy - of which you have little (if any?) to spare.   My team and I recently created an Attraction/Amplification/Activation framework for my business coaching clients to help them build powerful business relationships. After I taught this framework, I realized it could be applied to friendships. So, that is what we are going to dig into in this episode.   Listen in to hear me share: My Attraction/Amplification/Activation framework to finding awesome relationships The 5 steps to attracting the right kind of friendships into your life Specific conversation starters you can use with new folks you want to connect with and invite into your life Ideas for new friend “dates”  How to connect with confidence when you might be feeling a little shy about inviting new friends into your life  Link mentioned: Get my newsletter to learn about events where you can connect with other Shameless Moms: shamelessmom.com/newsletter Sponsor info and promo codes: Please find our sponsor information here: shamelessmom.com/sponsor/ Interested in becoming a sponsor of the Shameless Mom Academy? Email our sales team at sales@adalystmedia.com

    639: Kate Swenson: Forever Boy: A Mother's Memoir of Autism and Finding Joy

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 6, 2022 53:54

    Kate Swenson is a proud working mama of four living in suburban Minnesota. She lives for coffee, preaches kindness like her life depends on it and is continuously surprised by the twists and turns of motherhood. Her son Cooper was diagnosed with autism when he was three years old and since then life hasn't slowed down. Her daily life consists of keeping tiny humans alive and writing, creating videos, and influencing. She launched Finding Cooper's Voice 5 years ago for a place to share her feelings and today it is almost a million people strong.  Listen in to Kate share: How she wrote a book as a pregnant mom of 4 during the pandemic The process of her son Cooper being diagnosed with autism The taboo nature of grieving your child's diagnosis How she held grief and relief simultaneously after Cooper's diagnosis How she and her husband grieved differently, leading to their divorce and eventual reconciliation and remarriage What communication looks like for Cooper as a non verbal child How to use language in an inclusive way (special needs vs disabilty, autistic child vs child with autism) The backlash and bullying she received after going viral talking about autism Her new book Forever Boy: A Mother's Memoir of Autism and Finding Joy - and why every parent should read it Links mentioned: Join my business training: Build Your Courageous & Confident CEO Blueprint: shamelessmom.com/ceo Connect with Kate: https://findingcoopersvoice.mysites.io Kate on FB Kate on IG Book: Forever Boy: A Mother's Memoir of Autism and Finding Joy Sponsor info and promo codes: Please find our sponsor information here: shamelessmom.com/sponsor/ Interested in becoming a sponsor of the Shameless Mom Academy? Email our sales team at sales@adalystmedia.com

    638: Sometimes Quitting Is Upleveling

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 4, 2022 33:45

    Quitting is often synonymous with failure or laziness or not enoughness. But the truth is… sometimes quitting is upleveling.   Recently, I was on a call with a coaching client and she was sharing some of the shame she was carrying around changing jobs 4 times in one year. As we talked through each job, she shared how her titles and roles became bigger and carried more responsibilities. She had made significant jumps in each new position. Then she charted out her salary in each position to see that she increased her salary with each new role, and over the course of the year, she doubled her salary. Doubled! So, I asked her this: Is it true that each job you quit allowed you to up-level in the next job? When she realized this to be the truth, she became emotional, explaining that she never knew she could carry the title she now carries, nor support her family with this level of income.  Sometimes quitting is upleveling. In fact, sometimes the only way to up-level is to quit something.   When you quit one thing, you make space for the next thing. With every conscious choice to say NO to one thing, you make space for a YES somewhere else.   Whether you are quitting a job, a relationship, a task/chore, a role, spending your time or energy in a certain way, you are making space to move into jobs, roles, relationships, time & energy in a way that is more aligned with your values and who you are becoming. This is upleveling. This is growth. This is power.   Tune into this episode to learn more about the power of quitting and how to reframe quitting in your mind in order to step into growth in a more intentional way.  Link mentioned: Join my business training: Build Your Courageous & Confident CEO Blueprint: shamelessmom.com/ceo Sponsor info and promo codes: Please find our sponsor information here: shamelessmom.com/sponsor/ Interested in becoming a sponsor of the Shameless Mom Academy? Email our sales team at sales@adalystmedia.com

    637: Sage B. Hobbs: How To Sit in Conversations About Race and Culture as a White Woman

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 30, 2022 57:42

    Sage B. Hobbs is the author of Naked Communication and the host of Race, Culture, & Beyond: A Naked Conversations Podcast Series. Sage's passion for maximizing human potential, building emotional intelligence, and cultivating cultures of equity has led to over 20 years of experience working in public, private, and not-for-profit sectors. Her speciality is relational leadership and communication, enabling leaders and team members to create positive relationships and organizational cultures that ensure greater success and satisfaction.   With a commitment to continual learning of diversity, equity, and inclusion, Sage brings an equity lens to all of her work. She's comfortable facilitating uncomfortable conversations in order to support the growth and impact that her clients seek.   Sage and I became friends after she was on my show for the first time a couple years ago. As her work has evolved to be more centered around DEI work, we have had some great conversations around what it means to be a white woman talking about race and culture in America. I know many of you are committed to diversity, equity and inclusion across your communities, so I thought this would be a really valuable conversation to have here.  Listen in to hear Sage share: How we are building resilience in the smallest moments of joy right now Her daily 10 minute practice with 3 girlfriends that has had massive impact over the last few months Why she decided to launch her podcast, Race, Culture, and Beyond, and the considerations she made to create a show on race as a white woman How she's handled making inadvertent microaggressions on her show The truth about being an ally, who gets to own that word and the significance of ally being a verb How we can make equity a throughline in all the ways we show up in various communities The power of choosing curiosity over assumption to de escalate conflict and come to a solution How to make space for everyone, especially introverts and slower processors, in conversations   Links mentioned: Join my April 6th business training, Build Your Courageous & Confident CEO Blueprint: shamelessmom.com/ceo Podcast: Race, Culture, and Beyond Connect with Sage: sagebhobbs.com Sage on LinkedIn Sage on Instagram: @sagebhobbs and @racecultureandbeyondpodcast TV Shows: Queen Sugar and Remy Book: Me and White Supremacy by Layla Saad Sponsor info and promo codes: Please find our sponsor information here: shamelessmom.com/sponsor/ Interested in becoming a sponsor of the Shameless Mom Academy? Email our sales team at sales@adalystmedia.com

    636: How to Get Grounded When Your World is Spinning

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 28, 2022 35:48

    “I feel like I'm floating above my body, watching myself move through the world.” At least 3 coaching clients have told me this in the last week or so.   So many of us are navigating big seasons of change, growth, and transformation. Sometimes that is accompanied by feeling like your world is spinning out of control like you're moving through your days with no sense of which way is up like your feet are not planted firmly on the ground.   This might be because the pace of life is just really fast right now. It might be because you are entering a new season of uncertainty. It might be because there has been a big professional shift for you. It might be because a significant relationship in your life has shifted - or ended.   Regardless of why you're feeling this sensation of floating over yourself, it is absolutely possible to bring your feet back to the ground and feel yourself planted in the moment and in your day. It is possible to bring back a sense of awareness to what you CAN control when things feel out of control. It is possible to learn to return to yourself and feel a sense of ease in moments of dis-ease.   In this episode, I walk you through 6 ways you can get grounded when you feel like your world is spinning out of control. These are simple things you can do to get your feet planted beneath you in order to feel a sense or calm and power as you navigate a hard day or a hard season.   Link mentioned: Join my April 6th business training, Build Your Courageous & Confident CEO Blueprint: shamelessmom.com/ceo Sponsor info and promo codes: Please find our sponsor information here: shamelessmom.com/sponsor/ Interested in becoming a sponsor of the Shameless Mom Academy? Email our sales team at sales@adalystmedia.com

    635: Deeann Graham: Head On: Stories of Alopecia

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 23, 2022 55:32

    Deeann Graham is the award-winning author of Head-On, Stories of Alopecia, and an alopecia coach/consultant, educator, and advocate. She was first diagnosed with alopecia areata (an autoimmune hair loss condition) when she was 7-years-old. She published Head-On, Stories of Alopecia to share stories and photos of people around the world who are living with alopecia, in order to provide a broad perspective on the journey of hair loss. Educating communities in order to empower others who have been diagnosed, especially in the beauty and medical industries, is an important part of Deeann's outreach. She is also the course creator of the Alopecia Roadmap, and host of the Alopecia Life podcast where she continues to educate and share stories to help others realize they are not alone. Listen in to hear Deeann share: Alopecia 101: what alopecia is and how it can manifest differently in people The difference between alopecia and alopecia areata What her life was like as a 7 year who experienced total hair loss What it was like to not know anyone with alopecia like her for 30 years to then making 500 new friends with alopecia Her decision to stop wearing wigs when her daughter was in the 2nd grade and how she handled kids at her daughter's school talking about her Where people experiencing hair loss can turn for support What to say and what not to say to someone who is bald or balding Links mentioned: Join my free CEO training for small business owners: shamelessmom.com/ceo Connect with Deeann: alopecialife.com/  Get Deeann's Book: Head-On, Stories of Alopecia Deeann's Podcast: Alopecia Life Deeann on IG Deeann's FB Group Nonprofits:  https://www.childrensalopeciaproject.org | https://www.naaf.org/   Sponsor info and promo codes: Please find our sponsor information here: shamelessmom.com/sponsor/ Interested in becoming a sponsor of the Shameless Mom Academy? Email our sales team at sales@adalystmedia.com

    634: Struggling with Self Worth? Start Here

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 21, 2022 35:56

    One of the most common struggles for women and moms centers around self-worth. Because we are taught from such an early age that we should look a certain way, act a certain way, desire certain things, reject certain things, we often spend a lot of our lives questioning ourselves.   We wonder if we are enough, if we are qualified, if we are making the right choice, if we should try harder if we should do things more like others are doing them,  We think about how we might be more perfect or polished or positive.  We assume other people have it all figured out.   We feel alone and isolated and confused.   Over the last 6 years, and in my 15-year fitness career before the Shameless Mom Academy, countless women have told me they struggle with self-worth.  If you struggle with self-worth, whether it's been a struggle your entire life or it's something that is hard for you in this particular season, this episode is for you.  Listen in as I walk you through 5 simple steps to start shifting your self-worth today.   Link mentioned:  Join my free CEO training for small business owners: shamelessmom.com/ceo Sponsor info and promo codes: Please find our sponsor information here: shamelessmom.com/sponsor/ Interested in becoming a sponsor of the Shameless Mom Academy? Email our sales team at sales@adalystmedia.com

    633: Reshma Saujani: The Future of Women and Work

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 16, 2022 50:15

    Reshma Saujani is a leading activist and the founder of Girls Who Code and the Marshall Plan for Moms. She has spent more than a decade advocating for women's and girls' economic empowerment, working to close the gender gap in the tech sector, and, most recently, championing policies to support mothers impacted by the pandemic. Saujani is also the author of the international bestseller Brave, Not Perfect, and her influential TED talk, “Teach Girls Bravery, Not Perfection,” has more than five million views. She began her career as an attorney and Democratic organizer, and she now lives in New York City with her husband, Nihal; their sons, Shaan and Sai; and their bulldog, Stanley.   I have been a long-time follower and admirer of Reshma's work and her relentless commitment to her mission. I was so delighted when she said yes to this conversation. As you listen to Reshma share how she sees the future of work for women and moms in America, I think you will see yourself reflected over and over again as she offers story after story that Illuminates the impossible expectations put upon moms over the last two years.   Listen in to hear Reshma share: What is the Future of Women and Work – and why is it different than we think What women are looking for in an employer The long term significance of 2.3 million women leaving the workforce in the last year Her Marshall Plan for Moms, what came out of it, why it's critically important in this historical moment What all moms can do to be a part of the PAY UP movement to push through change for moms and women in the workforce across the country Why it's imperative that we “not waste a good crisis” The constant cognitive dissonance for moms around being told we can have it all and not having access to having it Why she is critical of the feminist movement and is still a Feminist   Links mentioned: Connect with Reshma: reshmasaujani.com Get Reshma's Book: PAY UP: The Future of Women and Work Reshma on IG  Reshma on Twitter     Please find our sponsor information here: shamelessmom.com/sponsor/

    632: How to Change Your State to Change Your Day

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 14, 2022 37:08

    Last week I got stuck. A cascade of hard events plus solo parenting for the week plus general pandemic/war/life fatigue caught up with me.  I don't get stuck often. But every now and then, if I don't check myself, a series of hard events will send me spiraling into a funkity funk funk.   Last week was a funkity funk funk week for sure.   After sitting in my funkity funk funk for a good 20 hours or so, I decided it was time to pull out my tools.   After many years of defunktifying myself, I know exactly what works for me. After 19 years of coaching women, I know what works for most folks.   If you happen to fall into your own funkity funk funks every now and then, this episode is for you. I'm going to walk you through exactly how to defunktify yourself by changing your state to change your day.   These tools are really simple, but ridiculously and predictably powerful. They WORK.   So, let's defunktify, shall we? Link mentioned: Leave a review for the SMA: shamelessmom.com/review Please find our sponsor information here: shamelessmom.com/sponsor/

    631: Margaret Ables and Amy Wilson: What Fresh Hell - Laughing in the Face of Motherhood

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 9, 2022 56:47

    Margaret Ables and Amy Wilson, are comedians, mothers, and hosts of the podcast What Fresh Hell: Laughing in the Face of Motherhood.  What Fresh Hell regularly ranks at the top of the Parenting and Kids and Family charts on Apple Podcasts, and has over five million lifetime downloads. In each episode Margaret and Amy discuss a parenting topic from their usually-completely opposite perspectives. Amy Wilson is the author of When Did I Get Like This? The Screamer, The Worrier, The Dinosaur-Chicken-Nugget Buyer, and Other Mothers I Swore I'd Never Be (HarperCollins) and of Mother Load, a one-woman show which she toured to 16 cities after its hit off-Broadway run. She also appeared as a series regular in two sitcoms (Daddio on NBC and Norm on ABC). She and her husband live in New York City with their three kids. Margaret Ables is a comedian and writer whose work has appeared on MTV, Comedy Central, Nickelodeon, and PBS. Margaret created television shows for Klasky Csupo (creators of Rugrats) and was the head of video production for Nickelodeon's mom-centric channel NickMom. Margaret also teaches improv and public speaking in correctional facilities for the non-profit organization Rehabilitation Through the Arts. She and her husband live in Westchester, NY with their three kids. I met Amy and Margaret via our mutual podcast editing team (SHOUT OUT to Christy and Allison!) Christy had a sense we might hit it off and, of course, she was spot on.  Listen in to hear Margaret and Amy share: How they came together to create WFH and how each bring their unique strengths to create support for parents how parenting changes and evolves us over the years why we don't need to fear or resist the constant growth that parenting provides Why new ventures and unchartered territory feel so big and daunting as we approach them, but then so much smaller in hindsight How parenting problems over the years. IE: little kids = lots of problems/easy to solve, big kids = fewer problems, harder to solve The difference between “easy” parenting and satisfying parenting What satisfying parenting looks like and how it can look sooo different than what you expected Links mentioned: Connect with Margaret and Amy: whatfresshhellpodcast.com Podcast: What Fresh Hell WFH on IG WFH FB Group Please find our sponsor information here: shamelessmom.com/sponsor/

    630: 3 Simple Ways To Start Speaking Up

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 7, 2022 34:36

    I had the honor of speaking at an event for moms last week. My talk was “How to Play Bigger in Life without Asking Permission.” After my talk, there was time for Q&A and the question folks kept circling back to was, “How do I start to speak up so I can play a bigger game?”   A number of attendees noted they were so in the habit of not speaking up that they didn't know where or how to start using their voices.   Because women have been socialized to stay small and quiet, we often have to really make a concerted effort to actually use our voices.   I gave these women three steps to start practicing speaking up: Practice stating your preferences out loud  Practice stating your needs out loud Practice sharing opposing opinions in neutral ways  These steps are intended to be practiced over time, in this order. Start out with low risk/low exposure steps. The stakes are typically pretty low when you're stating a preference: “I prefer pepperoni pizza to sausage & mushroom.” Or, “I would prefer to watch Movie ABC vs Movie XYZ this evening.” Once you've practiced this a few times, try to share a need with a loved one: “I need some time to myself, so I'm going to take myself to lunch and a movie this weekend.” Practice this a few times.   Once you've practiced #1 and #2 over time, you can move to higher exposure speaking up - where the risks and stakes are higher. This is where you can start to practice sharing an opposing opinion in a neutral way, “Thank you for sharing your opinion/experience. That hasn't been my experience.” Or, “Thank you for sharing your opinion/experience. I see it differently.” Make sure to listen in to the episode to learn how to do #3 safely, this part is important! Listen in to learn more about how to practice speaking up - in order to get what you want and, ultimately, in order to impact the world.  Please find our sponsor information here: shamelessmom.com/sponsor/

    629: Jen Kem: Staying Values Driven Through Having It All, Losing It All and Building It All Again Airs

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 2, 2022 57:29

    Jennifer Kem is a San Francisco Bay Area-based brand building and leadership expert who gets entrepreneurs seen, heard, and paid for being themselves. She's the creator of the Master Brand Method: a framework to develop powerful brand archetypes that win customers' hearts, leveraging Jennifer's 20 years of corporate experience and her launching of multiple companies. What she is most passionate about in her work today is her legacy project: Femmefluence, a platform that supports women leaders to fully rise into their influence and affluence, so they can make an even greater impact in the world. Jennifer serves up straight talk wrapped in love, because she understands entrepreneurs' challenges. She built a retail business and became a millionaire at 32, only to lose it all in the recession two years later. She is now the successful owner of three million-dollar brand-building businesses and the mother of three children. I've had the opportunity to overlap Jen in a few business groups over the last couple years and she is a force. I finally got to meet her a few months ago and I decided to ask her to be a guest on the show. I was elated when she said yes, as I know she has such a compelling story.     Listen in to hear Jen share: Her experience of going through a violating event in her corporate career that changed the trajectory of her work and her life How she went from having it all, to losing it all, to building it all again - all on her own terms as she navigated being a wife and mom What happened when she built and then lost a 10 million dollar a year business What it means to be Values Driven and why it's crucial to know your values in life and work/business How your values can guide you to make confident and clean decisions How to find and define your values by clarifying your voids and violations Links mentioned: Connect with Jen: www.JenniferKem.com Jen's Podcast: Femmefluence Radio Jen on Instagram Jen on LinkedIn Jen on Facebook Jen on YouTube Jen on Twitter Jen on Pinterest Please find our sponsor information here: shamelessmom.com/sponsor/

    628: The Power Of Taking Tiny Action

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 28, 2022 34:18

    There are times when we look at something we would like to accomplish and it just feels too far out of reach - like the work required to get us to that point is not only completely overwhelming but also elusive in nature. When we consider taking action we think: How will I find the time? How will I find the energy? How will I acquire the skills? Do I even have what it takes? By the time we get through this list of questions, we decide it's too hard, will take too long, we definitely don't have the skills and we don't know where to begin to acquire them.   So, we do nothing.   I want to invite you to an alternative way to take action in your life: practice taking tiny action. What is tiny action? Tiny action is those little steps that we are tempted to skip entirely because we falsely assume they don't matter or won't make a difference.   But the truth is that if we want to become better action takers, taking tiny action might just be the prerequisite you didn't know you needed.   Taking tiny action is taking any action step and making it smaller, less overwhelming, less time consuming, less frequent, less energy-consuming.   When we practice taking tiny action over time, we begin to see the effects of compound interest: 10 minutes of exercise each day that boosts energy and productivity 10 minutes of reading each day that inspires our work or our way of thinking Yoga once a week that alleviates back pain Date nights once a month that improve our marriage Asking for what we need from our family once a week that leads to more personal time Speaking up at the monthly office meeting that leads to being considered for a new role at work As we take action in these small ways, our identity starts to shift and we see ourselves as more capable, more confident, more courageous. We see ourselves as action takers who go after the things we want and actually get them!  This shift is not tiny. Taking tiny action leads to BIG shifts. In this episode, I share 4 ways taking tiny action gives you more power. Then, I share 3 simple steps to taking tiny action #everydamnday.   Please find our sponsor information here: shamelessmom.com/sponsor/

    627: Laurel Handfield: From Low Self-Worth And Self-Harm To Creating Books For Girls Of Color

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 23, 2022 43:12

    Laurel Handfield began her writing career years ago in a small, suburban town outside of Philadelphia, PA. In college, she majored in business marketing and after graduation, she worked in sales, marketing, and advertising. However, a trip to the Bahamas led to a shift in focus and a rediscovery of her true passion: writing. Her vacation to the islands turned into an unexpected romance when she met and fell in love with her now-husband. After two years in a long-distance relationship, she decided to move to the Bahamas permanently. While life in the Bahamas was slower and more relaxed, she also discovered that her marketing career didn't hold quite as much opportunity on the islands as it did in the United States, so she went back to creating. She wrote and ghostwrote over five full-length novels, including a fictional tale about the only Black family on the Titanic. Today, Laurel creates coloring/activity books for young girls of color. She still calls the Bahamas home and enjoys the laid-back island life with her husband, three children, and two dogs. Listen in to hear Laurel share: Her journey of building her self esteem as a young Black girl and then a Black woman The impact of being teased for her looks and physical attributes as a young girl How the impact of her low self-worth led to self-harm in the form of an eating disorder How she healed from her low self-esteem and eating disorder - and recognized what an epidemic there was around the struggles she was facing What inspired her work to create books and coloring books for girls of color How moms can affirm their daughter's worth in different ways Her advice to moms who might want to write a book Links mentioned: Join me in Jen Lumanlan's 10 week Taming Your Triggers workshop: shamelessmom.com/taming Connect with Laurel: www.happyislandpress.com Laurel's Books on Amazon: Happy Island Press Laurel on FB Laurel on IG Laurel on TikTok Please find our sponsor information here: shamelessmom.com/sponsor/

    626: Sara & Laura Cathcart Robbins Recap Their Dr. Phil Appearance and CRT

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 21, 2022 56:24

    Back in August of 2021, I got a text from my dear friend Laura Cathcart Robbins: “Sara, I know this is crazy, but I'm going on the Dr. Phil show on Wednesday to talk about CRT and they've just asked me if I know of any white moms who might be willing to speak as an ally and I thought of you. Would this be something you would consider?” I thought for a solid 30 seconds, felt like I might vomit, and then said YES.   The next day, I flew to LA to record the show.   It was a whirlwind event around a huge topic: Should Critical Race Theory be Taught in Schools?  This week, I asked Laura if she would come on the SMA (for the 3rd time - WHOOP!) to have a conversation around our experience and around Critical Race Theory in America.    If you're not familiar with Laura, she is the host of the popular podcast, The Only One In The Room (you must subscribe!), and author of the forthcoming Atria/Simon& Schuster memoir, STASH (due out in spring of 2023). She has been active for many years as a speaker and school trustee and is credited for creating The Buckley School's nationally recognized committee on Diversity, Equity, Inclusion, and Justice. Her recent articles in Huffpo and The Temper on the subjects of race, recovery, and divorce have garnered her worldwide acclaim. She is a LA Moth StorySlam winner and currently sits on the advisory boards of the San Diego Writer's Festival and the Outliers HQ podcast Festival. In this conversation, Laura and I dig into: Why each of us said YES to appearing on Dr. Phil Some of the behind the scenes surprises while taping the show What Critical Race Theory actually is Our takeaways from the conversation we had with 6 other guests on the show - all of whom had strong opinions and some very opposed to ours What the media is actually talking about when they talk about “Critical Race Theory in schools” Steve Bannon's involvement in creating an intentionally divisive conversation for Conservatives to more easily pave the road to the White House What is actually being taught in schools that is being misrepresented as Critical Race Theory Why age appropriate race education is crucial in schools Links mentioned: Join me in Jen Lumanlan's 10 week Taming Your Triggers workshop: shamelessmom.com/taming Connect with Laura: theonlyonepod.com/ Podcast: The Only One In The Room Laura on YouTube Laura on IG Please find our sponsor information here: shamelessmom.com/sponsor/

    625: Melissa Guida-Richards: What White Parents Should Know About Transracial Adoption

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 16, 2022 48:16

    Melissa Guida-Richards is a Shameless Mom to two little boys and the author of WHAT WHITE PARENTS SHOULD KNOW ABOUT TRANSRACIAL ADOPTION. Melissa uses her gift of writing to help other adoptees and adoptive families. Her work has been featured in The Independent, Zora, Insider, HuffPo, Level at Medium, Electric Literature, Hello Giggles. And she had a viral Huffpost Article, My Adoptive Parents Hid My Racial Identity For 19 Years. She is also a contributing writer for The Everymom. I am in a Facebook group for writers and when Melissa shared a bit of her story in that group, I immediately reached out to ask her if she'd be willing to join me here on the podcast. I'm so grateful that she said yes.   Listen in to hear Melissa share: Her adoption story of being adopted from an orphanage in Colombia, being raised in New York, and not being told she was adopted until age 19 The process of discovering she was Latina, not Portuguese Italian, as her family had led her to believe The process of having her article, My Adoptive Parents Hid My Racial Identity For 19 Years, go viral The evolution of her relationship with her parents in the years after discovering she was adopted What inspired her to write her first book, What White Parents Should Know About Transracial Adoption Important notes for white adoptive parents or prospective white adoptive parents Her experience of finding her biological sisters and mom How having her own children created an entire process of grieving around her adoption How she's connected to her Colombian culture as an adult and as a mom raising Colombian sons Links mentioned: Join me in Jen Lumanlan's 10-week Taming Your Triggers workshop: shamelessmom.com/taming Connect with Melissa: AdopteeThoughts.com  Melissa's Book, What White Parents Should Know About Transracial Adoption Melissa on IG Please find our sponsor information here: shamelessmom.com/sponsor/

    624: 8 Top Triggers for Moms in 2022

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 14, 2022 38:20

    For the last couple weeks, I have been talking about triggers in parenting - and life. I had to laugh as I was putting together content for this episode. As I was preparing my notes early one morning, Vinnie told me his “nose was burning.” He shared this about 7 minutes before we were supposed to leave for school. Of course. Given the current Covid climate, I couldn't just send him to school. We had to talk through a litany of symptoms, take his temperature, run a rapid Covid test… All the damn things required if one has the slightest inkling their child might be bringing germs to school.   The Covid test came back negative, but with a sore throat (aka “burning nose”) and a bit of congestion on board, V had to stay home from school. This was NOT the plan I had for my day. NOT AT ALL.  I found myself totally triggered in the middle of creating this episode on the top triggers facing moms in 2022. Talk about ironic timing… I know I'm not the only mom who is super over the constant uncertainty of every single day, the endless pivoting of best laid plans, and the chronic fatigue of juggling 197 things #everydamnday.   In this episode, I share the 8 top triggers impacting moms right now as well. It is my hope that you will feel seen and held as reflect on all that you are being expected to manage right now. Then I offer you some “medicine” to support your mental and emotional health as you continue to show up day after day doing your very best.   As always, we are in this together. I'm losing my shit just as often as you… promise. Let's stick together, shall we. Link mentioned: Join me in Jen Lumanlan's 10 week Taming Your Triggers workshop: shamelessmom.com/taming   Please find our sponsor information here: shamelessmom.com/sponsor/

    Ep 623: Jen Lumanlan: Taming Your Triggers In Motherhood

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 9, 2022 57:21

    Jen Lumanlan holds a Masters in Psychology in Child Development and hosts the Your Parenting Mojo podcast, which is a reference guide for parents of children between the toddler and elementary years based on scientific research and the principles of respectful parenting. In each episode, she examines a topic related to parenting and child development from all sides to help parents understand how to make decisions about raising their children. She lives in California with her husband and daughter. This is Jen's second time on the show. She is back this time to talk about taming your triggers in parenting, which is a very timely topic, like every parent I know is feeling especially spread thin and beyond exhausted after enduring the last two years. We dig into the concept of parenting triggers and then Jen coaches me about a trigger that is very front and center in my own parenting journey right now. Please enjoy hearing me get uncomfortable!  Listen in to hear Jen share: Why you're feeling triggered by your child's behavior How your parenting triggers might be connected to your own “little t” traumas or “big T” traumas of your past How your own trauma of unmet needs impacts your parenting The “magic bullet” to help you manage guilt and shame in hard parenting moments Coaching me through raising an extrovert who likes to be really loud all the time Scripts you can use to navigate conversations with your child so you can both get your needs met in hard moments The connection between our parenting and smashing the patriarchy The value in practicing repairing your relationship with your child after having a hard moment How to work with her (and me!) in her 10-week workshop, Taming Your Triggers Links mentioned: Sign up for Jen's free Masterclass on February 12th: How to Tame Your Triggers Around Your Child's Difficult Behavior: shamelessmom.com/triggers Join me and enroll in Jen's 10-week workshop, Taming Your Triggers between February 13th-23rd: shamelessmom.com/taming Book: Set Boundaries, Find Peace Please find our sponsor information here: shamelessmom.com/sponsor/

    Ep 622: You Don't Need To Be A Better Mom

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 7, 2022 27:09

    I was in a conversation with a coaching client the other day and we were hashing out some details around her company branding and mission. She is a badass coach who works with moms who want to learn how to prioritize themselves in order to shift the relationship to self and the way they parent to overcome things like mom rage and all the other overwhelming emotions that come with momming on any given day.  As we were talking through some ideas, she mentioned how the moms she works with want to “become better moms”. I found myself nodding along. Yes, of course! Who doesn't want to be a better mom?! The next morning. I found myself in the shower thinking about this conversation and I had a visceral reaction. NO. WE DON'T NEED TO BECOME BETTER MOMS.   I get that we desire to be our very best for our kids.   And we always want to become better versions of ourselves.   I know so many of you listening are committed to growth and evolution and doing better when it comes to everything from the way you mother to the way you show up at work to the way you participate as a good citizen in your communities.   But, if we are carrying with us this constant idea that, “I need to be a better mom”, we are likely carrying guilt, shame and a strong sense of not enoughness.   It is quite possible that your desire to “become a better mom” is completely undermining the incredible mother you already are. In this episode, I dig into how you can change your mindset around the mother you currently are in order to bring more joy and peace to mothering and life in general.   You are already an amazing mom. Full stop.  Link mentioned: Sign up for Jen Lumanlan's free Masterclass on February 12th: How to Tame Your Triggers Around Your Child's Difficult Behavior: shamelessmom.com/triggers Please find our sponsor information here: shamelessmom.com/sponsor/

    Ep 621: Amy Henderson: How Motherhood Changes Your Brain And Makes You More Marketable

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 2, 2022 54:21

    Amy Henderson is one of our nation's leading voices on the critical role of parenting and caregiving in developing the future of work. Amy has three kids and is the founding CEO of TendLab, where she has been working with companies and their parents' groups at places like Salesforce, Accenture, Cloudflare, Airbnb, Lululemon, and many others to optimize the workplace for parents. As cited in Forbes for her "truly collaborative nature," Amy also started and co-leads the Fam Tech Founders Collaborative, a network of over 180 founders who are solving for the needs of caregivers.   A regular speaker and author advocating on behalf of the power of parenthood at work, Amy has been featured in and written for The Wall Street Journal, Forbes, Fortune, Fast Company, Slate, InStyle, and more. Her book, 'Tending: Parenthood and the Future of Work," was published by Nationbuilder Books in May 2021.   I got to hear Amy speak at an event for her book recently and I was blown away. I reached out to her (aka: stalked her down online) immediately after the event and asked her to join me for an interview. I'm so delighted and honored she said yes. Her work is not only brilliant, but absolutely critical, right now.  Listen in to hear Amy share: Her stark realizations after having 3 kids under the age of 4 and having to figure out how to raise babies and her career How parenthood changes all parents brains - regardless of whether or not you birthed your child How parenthood unlocks parts of your brain forever - that qualify you to show up and lead in new and more dynamic ways for the rest of your life Why the US is the only developed country in the world in which parenthood decreases your happiness instead of increasing it The motherhood penalty in the workplace - PS: it's REAL How PTSD prepared her for being a working mom in America 5 things parenthood unlocks within you that makes you more capable and marketable if you choose to leverage them What gives her hope for working moms in the US - and how COVID may have helped us in a certain sense   Links mentioned: Book: Tending: Parenthood and the Future of Work Connect with Amy: amyhenderson.org TendLab: TendLab.com Amy on LinkedIn Amy on Instagram Amy on Twitter Amy on Facebook Please find our sponsor information here: shamelessmom.com/sponsor/

    Ep 620: 5 Steps To Amplify Possibility In Your Life

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 31, 2022 35:29

    Are you the type of person who must keep moving forward in order to keep up hope? I definitely am.   When things get heavy and hard, if I sit down for too long, the weight of the world becomes heavier with every inhale. The walls start to close in on me, anxiety takes control of my brain, and it can take an uncomfortable, if not unreasonable amount of time to break down those walls. I hate dealing with those walls, so I am careful not to let them close in on me.   I stay in motion. I make things happen. I keep up the momentum.   Even when things are hard.  This doesn't mean I don't rest. It just means that I KEEP GOING, even if I slow down a bit, even if I stop for a nap. It means I keep looking for the light, which sometimes means searching for the tiniest cracks to find the light only beginning to peek in. It means I look for reasons and purpose and people to guide me toward possibility.   We are in a time right now where possibilities can feel pretty limited. So, I wanted to share with you how I'm helping my clients amplify possibility as I coach individuals and groups through this relentless season.  In this episode I share 5 steps to help you amplify possibility right now: Assume success Step back to see the forest through the trees more regularly Reconsider timelines and stop waiting for “someday” Tighten and expand your circle as frequently as necessary Find the edges and feel them After you listen in, let me know how you will KEEP GOING and one step you will take to amplify possibility this week. Link mentioned: Leave a review for the show: shamelessmom.com/review (Thank you!! Your reviews mean soooo much to me!) Please find our sponsor information here: shamelessmom.com/sponsor/

    Ep 619: Terri Cole: How to Be A Boundary Boss In Motherhood and Life

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 26, 2022 51:53

    Terri Cole is a licensed psychotherapist, global relationship and empowerment expert, and the author of Boundary Boss-The Essential Guide to Talk True, Be Seen and (Finally) Live Free. For over two decades, she has worked with a diverse group of clients that includes everyone from stay-at-home moms to celebrities and Fortune 500 CEOs.   Terri has a gift for making complex psychological concepts accessible and actionable so that clients and students achieve sustainable change. She inspires over 450,000 people weekly through her blog, social media platform, signature courses, and her popular podcast, The Terri Cole Show.    When the opportunity to interview Terri landed in my inbox, I JUMPED. I have heard her speak a few times over the years and she is always FIRE. I cannot wait to share her genius here with you! Make sure to check out the free gift she is offering all Shameless Moms at boundaryboss.me/shameless. Listen in to hear Terri share: What boundaries are (your own personal rules of engagement) and why they matter Disordered and dysfunctional boundaries The importance of uncovering your downloaded boundary blueprint The danger of the truth that: “Women are raised and praised to be self-abandoning codependents” How to take small steps to better boundaries and pause all of your YESes Why boundaries are crucial in parenting and what disordered boundaries in parenting can look like How fear shows up and prevents us from setting healthy boundaries and speaking truthfully How she works with people through The Real Love Revolution - via a deep dive into yourself Links mentioned: Learn about Terri's course, Real Love Revolution: terricole.com/rlr Terri's free gift for Shameless Moms: boundaryboss.me/shameless Podcast: The Terri Cole Show: https://terricole.com/itunes Terri on IG Terri on Twitter Terri on FB Terri on YouTube   Please find our sponsor information here: shamelessmom.com/sponso

    Ep 618: It's Not What You Think… The Truth About Motherhood in 2022

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 24, 2022 37:28

    We set mothers up to fail in this pandemic. For decades before the pandemic began, we told moms they could and should DO IT ALL. While the intent was to give women permission to do all the things men do - we screwed this one up. Big time. Instead of giving moms the support they need (read: childcare and household support), we let them just keep adding to their plates in an effort to prove they can “do it all”.   After decades of piling on all the things and 2 years of a global pandemic, moms are breaking under the pressure and no one is talking about it.  I routinely hear moms say things like: “I just need to get through this day/week/season.” “I know I have it better than others so I really don't want to complain.” “It's not that bad. I'm just a little tired. I can push through.” But, the reality is… for almost 700 days now: You haven't had a break Society hasn't acknowledged the massive load you've carried for the last 2 years (or decades before that) There is no end and no relief in sight Social media makes it look like everyone else is faring just fabulously, so you really should figure your shit out There are no solutions being presented that make anything easier - just temporary workarounds that might work for a hot second until the next dumpster fire The truth is… You don't need to push harder You don't need to try to keep up You don't pretend this isn't hard as hell You don't need to ignore or negate the impact of the last 2 years - even if you've “had it better than others” What you really need is likely: To be and acknowledged as someone who has (perhaps single handedly) kept the world spinning for an entire household To recognize that you have endured Trauma and/or trauma over the last 2 years in the form of loss, grief, and chronic stress and it's taken a toll on your nervous system and mental health Connection and camaraderie with women who can hold you, hear you, learn with you and laugh with you FUN In this episode, I talk you through how to get past what you've been fed in order to get WHAT YOU NEED.   Link mentioned: Join Momentum Mamas by January 25: shamelessmom.com/momentum Please find our sponsor information here: shamelessmom.com/sponsor/

    Ep 617: Uzma Jafri and Zaiba Hasan: Mommying While Muslim

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 19, 2022 62:05

    Uzma Jafri grew up in Houston, the daughter of Muslim immigrants from Pakistan and India. Coming from a traditional Muslim family and being unapologetically Muslim, while still identifying with American culture, made Uzma hyperaware of the dangers that arise when people conflate culture and religion. Today, Uzma is a physician running her own practice in Phoenix, medical director of an assisted living and hospice agency, and clinical faculty to future physicians. Uzma's most important full-time job is that of mom to her 4 kids.    Zaiba Hasan is an American Muslim who grew up biracial and bicultural. Born and raised in Chicago, Zaiba's Irish/Pakistani heritage and interfaith upbringing gave her a head start on navigating between identities. She is frequently invited to speak at interfaith events since her background makes her a natural at bridging gaps between Muslims and non-Muslims in the United States. When she isn't busy with podcasting, public speaking, fostering an interfaith community, or working on her Master's Degree & Parent Coaching Certification, Zaiba can be found with her husband and their four children at one of their sporting events. I am so honored to have Uzma and Zaiba on the show, as this is a critically important conversation for those who want to be true allies to our Muslim friends, neighbors, and community members. Listen in to hear Uzma and Zaiba share: The story of how two Muslim friends who hadn't seen each other in 20 years decided to launch a podcast together How Zaiba's son being stopped at an airport as a 14-year old Muslim boy inspired their show, Mommying While Muslim How creating a community and resource for Muslim moms ended up attracting a lot of white moms and evangelical men and the value of creating a space where listeners feel like they can be a fly on the wall with two Muslim moms The significance of being in the last pre 911 generation of Muslims in America The racial and religious profiling that happened and continues to happen post 911 How we expand our capacity to connect as humans when we listen in to the stories of people who are unlike us Links mentioned: Join Momentum Mamas: shamelessmom.com/momentum Subscribe to the Podcast: Mommying While Muslim Learn more about Uzma and Zaiba: mommyingwhilemuslim.com Reach out to Uzma and Zaiba: salam@mommyingwhilemuslim.com Uzma and Zaiba on IG

    Ep 616: Why Moms Need More Mentorship

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 17, 2022 38:57

    It's not ok. Mothers need mentorship. Desperately. And we're not getting it - anywhere, really. Because as a culture we leave moms to fend for themselves with ridiculously frugal resources to support their physical and mental health in the early years of motherhood, most moms are left feeling lonely and isolated as they care for their babies. Sometimes desperately so. And they have nowhere to turn. In the absence of mentorship, moms feel like they are failing, like everyone else has it all figured out and they just need to “be strong” or pull themselves up by their bootstraps.  There is no guidance, let alone connection, companionship or camaraderie for struggling moms. There is no clear path through hard days or hard seasons. There is no normalization of how incredibly hard motherhood is.  There are plenty of beautiful instagram accounts that suggest you should be camera ready at all times and be hustling to post all your baby's milestones and all your career wins, but no permission for you to be chronically overwhelmed and overstimulated, exhausted to the point of disorientation, disconnected to your former sense of self to the point of major anxiety and/or depression. ENOUGH ALREADY. In today's episode, I break down what moms are missing out on when they don't have mentorship, the harm we perpetuate as a society that doesn't prioritize mother's needs and 5 ways for you to find the connection and mentorship you're likely craving. Link mentioned: Get SMA updates and an invitation to Momentum Mamas: shamelessmom.com/newsletter

    Ep 615: Sandra Etherington: How To Better Support Your Child Based On Their Innate Personality Type

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 12, 2022 60:12

    Sandra is a mom of a 6 year old and an 8 year old. She is the owner of Family Personalities and the co-host of the Family Personalities podcast, a show that brings personality type models into parenting. If this conversation fascinates you as much as it does me, definitely go subscribe to her show! Sandra uses her experience and training in Myers-Briggs personality type, to work with families, helping them parent more effectively and compassionately based on their children's unique wiring and needs. I am obsessed with personality types. I believe that knowing your type gives you so much power to lean into who you truly are in all the best ways possible. This was a fantastic and deeply insightful conversation all around how knowing our personality type and our kid's personality types can be hugely beneficial and helpful in supporting our kid's needs.  Listen in to hear Sandra share: How to use the Myers-Briggs to understand how you make decisions, how you get energy, how you take in information How to best figure out your Myers-Briggs type - outside of standard assessments Why is super valuable to know your kids type in order to see some of their “harder” behaviors in a positive light How to use your child's type to motivate them  Her experience of struggling to “go with the flow” when enduring 4 miscarriages and really looking at her type to learn how to step away in order to see the bigger and pivot  Learning about the NJ superpower: gleaning insight, taking in data/info and curating it to create something bigger Links mentioned Connect with Sandra: familypersonalities.com Sandra on IG Sandra on FB Family Personalities Podcast: familypersonalities.com/podcast

    614: 3 Ways The Messages You're Carrying From Childhood Are Holding You Back

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 10, 2022 36:49

    It is highly likely there are some messages you have internalized from your childhood that still have a stronghold on you. These may have been explicit messages shared by friends and family members or maybe quiet, subtle, more insidious messages that became a part of who you are without you even realizing it.  Whatever the case may be, these messages are holding you back. They are half truths at best and harmful lies at worst. They likely keep you stuck in self criticism, self doubt, and frequent not-enoughness.  These messages have likely created feedback loops in your brain that tell you stories and keep you repeating patterns that don't serve you and possibly even bring you great struggle.  In this episode I share three messages that I carried from my childhood: People can leave at any moment. And some people might not know how to love you. Your body size is a reflection of your worth. Smaller is always better.  There are barely enough resources to get by. If anything unexpected happens, there won't be enough. These messages wove their way into my life in a variety of ways - some through observation, some were verbalized to me, and some were overheard (as I was/am a world class eavesdropper.)  I am sharing these 3 messages with you because it is likely you can relate to at least one of them. And you can also probably think of a few more that are unique to you.  If you carry messages like these with you and keep listening to them you will constantly struggle to see potential and possibility in your life. As we enter another season of uncertainty in the world, we can't afford to carry messages that compromise possibility and potential. So, I'm going to invite you to change your messaging and your thought loops - starting now.  Link mentioned Join my 2022 Plan & Prep Pajama Party: shamelessmom.com/pajamaparty

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