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The Curate loses his virginity.A series in 17 parts, By Blacksheep. Listen to the Podcast at Steamy Stories. At this Sunday's service, there was much talk of the upcoming harvest festival. Members of the congregation were encouraged to donate fruit and vegetables, along with non-perishable items for the local food bank.Jenna had made an effort and brought along a bag of apples. She placed the bag on the side table in the church hall."I don't know how a brazen hussy like you has the cheek to set foot in a church."Jenna remained calm, as she turned to face Mrs. Norris. "Well I'm a Christian, the same as you.""Huh! Christian my foot. I saw what you and the organist were getting up to and I think it's disgusting! In the church of all places! And he's old enough to be your father!""Well if you clutch those pearls of yours any tighter they'll crumble to dust. And Gordon and I happen to be consenting adults. Single consenting adults. So there.""Why you, you, .horrid little slag!" Mrs. Norris fumed, lip quivering. She stormed off.Jenna exhaled and rolled her eyes."Coffee or tea?" a friendlier voice asked. It was Debbie, the Sunday school teacher, who was volunteering to do today's hot drinks rota in the hall."Tea please," Jenna replied."You ok?""Yeah. I don't think I'll be on her Christmas card list.""Don't let that old bag get to you. She's a nasty one. She's horribly ageist. Not to mention xenophobic too. I overheard her mocking Yulia's English skills last week. I can't stand her. Her husband's not that bad, he's a tedious fusspot, but there's no malice in him. But her, she's poison.""I heard her hubby spreads gossip on Facebook." Jenna said."More likely that's her doing." Debbie replied. "I'd be surprised if John Norris even knows how to switch on a laptop."A brief chill ran through Jenna. What if Mrs. Norris were to post some bile about her online? "I don't use social media anymore," she said. "Briefly poked my nose into Twitter as a teen, but didn't like the pile-ons.""Wise. I'm on Facebook, but only to keep up with church stuff. I never post anything about my private life. I imagine Mrs. Norris would have a stroke if she knew I was dating a woman. A married woman at that. Keep it to yourself. I'm not ready to come out yet.""Don't worry, I won't say a word."Jenna sipped her tea quietly as she observed the other members of the congregation file into the hall. She was hoping Reverend Morris would soon arrive, but after fifteen minutes, there was still no sign of him. Then there was Gordon; he never came into the hall after a service, and he'd sent her that amusing text message on Friday, about Charles Wesley and his "bulging hymn book."She headed out of the hall, in search of Gordon, when Josh the curate came staggering in, carrying a massive pile of hymn books. He almost collided with Jenna and dropped a couple of books."Oh! I'm so sorry!" Josh stammered. "How clumsy of me."Jenna bent down and picked up the books. "You're loaded up like a pack horse. Let me give you a hand. Where are you taking all these?""Um. So kind!" His pale cheeks went pink. "The storeroom at the far end of the hall. These are spare hymn books.""Ok. Lead the way. By the way, you haven't seen the vicar have you?"""Oh, he and the organist are in a meeting. One of the organ pipes has just been repaired.""Damn," Jenna muttered under her breath. "Oh dear. How sad. I guess he'll miss his tea and biscuits."She followed Josh down to the storeroom. She'd never paid much attention to the curate before, but looking at him now, she realized that he was rather cute. Mid-twenties, tall and stocky with fair hair and a chubby face. There was an endearing innocence about him. Reverend Morris had said he was hoping to complete his ordination next year and become a fully-fledged vicar. He'd been impressed by his devotion to the church - but he needed to come out of his shell a bit and interact more with worshippers. Josh was a shy man and lacking in self-confidence. Remembering this information made Jenna smile.I think this innocent curate needs some other kind of help,The storeroom was vast, and crammed from floor to ceiling with box files, books, old furniture and plastic crates."Holy sh,, I didn't know this room existed. And what a lot of stuff for one small church!" Jenna exclaimed."Heh, yeah." Josh said, putting the books down. "It's not just for St Michael's. We share it with St John's and the Methodist church on Oakwood Road."Jenna began putting the books on the shelf."Um you don't need to do that,”"Jenna."Josh blushed again. "Jenna. It's kind of you to do that but,”"Oh I don't mind. Why should you have to do all the donkey work? This room is a tip. Besides, a good Christian should help others, right? Especially the vicar's right-hand man. That's what a curate is, yes?"Josh relaxed a bit. "Pretty much, yeah. Like Batman and Robin.""Have you always wanted to be a curate?"Josh sat down on a stool. "In truth, no way. I wasn't religious at all when I was a kid. I suffered from crippling shyness. I used to dread being asked to read in front of the class. When I was ten, my dad walked out, and that affected me a lot. Haven't seen him since. Mum turned to drink, I relied on my grandad for support. He became a father figure to me. He used to be a vicar. Thanks to him I survived my teens and passed my exams. I was eighteen when he died. That's when I decided I wanted to follow in his footsteps. Without him - and God, I fear, well I may have gone down a dark path. Got in with a bad crowd. Taken drugs, self-harmed, maybe ended up in jail.""Wow." Jenna replied, realizing how cosseted and safe her upbringing had been. "Well I'm so glad your grandad was there for you.""There are still days when I doubt myself and I'm in a bad place. I feel useless.""Don't put yourself down," Jenna said, walking towards him. "You're an amazing role model, especially for younger people."Josh blinked. "You, think so?""I do. Plus, you're really cute. Has a girl ever told you that before?"Josh blushed. "Err, no-one except my Nan. I don't think she counts.""Women round here must be blind," Jenna added, making him squirm with embarrassment. She leant forward and planted a kiss on his lips. He trembled, cheeks turning redder."J-Jenna, don't,”"It's alright Josh. You're not committing a sin or anything. We're not inside the church, if that's you're worried about.""N-no, it's not that. I, um,” The curate sighed. "I, I'm just scared of, I don't know if I can, do this."She already knew he was single and straight, but decided to question him. "Do you have a girlfriend?""No, but, um, that's the problem really. I'd like one, but I wouldn't know how to tell her,”Jenna stroked his arm. "Tell her what?""I worry she'd laugh at me.""Josh. Whatever it is, I promise I would never laugh at you. And I will understand."He looked down. "Shit. I'm twenty-five. And I'm still a virgin! I've never gone beyond kissing a girl."She kissed his cheek again. "Oh Josh. That's nothing to feel awkward about. In fact I admire you. In this age when we're bombarded with over-sexualized imagery 24/7 both online and offline, finding someone who's chosen to wait is pretty awesome in my opinion. I lost mine just days after reaching the age of consent. I couldn't wait to lose it. But that's just me,”"Yeah but, I, um,”She pulled him to his feet and gently coaxed the truth out of him. "You want to lose your virginity, yes?""More than anything. But, dating today is scary. It's a minefield. Especially after Me Too. I'm afraid. I don't want to say the wrong thing and come across as some horny creep,”Jenna held back a chuckle. Mrs. Norris probably thinks of me as a horny creep. She thought."I get that. But trust me. I don't think a sweet, kind-hearted man of God like you could ever be a creep. Horny yes, nothing wrong with that of course." She winked at him and he gulped. "How about it? I think you're ready right now."His eyes widened. "W-what? Here?""Why not? It's nice and private, And you're a really sexy curate!" Her face was just inches from his own, hovering there. Then her lips were on his, dancing there softly for a moment before pulling away."Jenna,” He was already rock hard, and hoped his cassock had disguised this fact."Shush. You're very special." She whispered, barely audible. "You're warm, caring, You're strong. You deserve to be experience the joys of the flesh." She kissed him again. It's okay to feel nervous. First time is always a bit nerve-racking. But just relax. You'll be just fine,”What an adorable lamb to the slaughter, Jenna thought to herself. He's so scared and unsure. I've never seduced a virgin before, so I'd better not go too hard on him. I do love a challenge. With a bit of encouragement, this sweet guy could have real potential.The touch of her lips sent a fire through his body, a jolt that brought a tingle to every micron of his skin. "Oh, Jenna!""Shhh." Her lips caressed his own, then his nose, his ear. "Don't talk just now, okay?""Mmm?"She kissed him again, gently caressing his upper lip between her own. At last, he responded."Josh." Jenna smiled cheekily. "You're a pretty good kisser, you know that?""Really?"Just relax. I'm not going anywhere, there's no rush. All we have to do is discover each other. There's no hurry. No-one's going to come in here. I imagine the vicar will be busy for ages."Jenna ran her hand down the front of his black cassock. "Oh my, you're more than ready. "Let's get these buttons unfastened." She knelt before him, opening the cassock and revealing the black trousers underneath. And another straining crotch bulge."I'm going to worship you," she whispered, unbuckling his belt and unzipping his trousers. Josh was wearing plain black briefs underneath. It was fun seeing the different types of undies men wore. First there was Reverend Morris with his "holy boxers," then Gordon and his sensible white y-fronts, now Josh with smart black tight-fitting briefs."Everything will be fine. I promise. Close your eyes if it makes you feel better, okay?"The curate hesitated still, but Jenna's smile was reassuring and gentle. "I promise you'll like it." With a shudder, Josh squeezed his eyes tight as his trousers and underwear were lowered, and he could feel the cool air of the room, then Jenna's warm breath on his manhood."There we are."He couldn't resist a peek, through half-closed eyes. He was painfully stiff, of course, harder than he'd ever been in his life, but he didn't need his eyes to tell him that. He shivered as Jenna ran her hand through his pubes and stooped to kiss him there. He gasped as her smooth palm encircled him."Oh my God!""Mmm. So beautiful. Truly God's gift to women. Just relax, don't fight the feeling. Isn't it nice?" Jenna kissed the very tip of his member, and he gasped and moaned, his muscles tensing. "Don't fight it now Josh, just let the feelings come. Relax and let it take you. You don't have to hold it back, just let it come." With that, she closed her lips around his head, tasted him with her tongue."Uh! Oh Jesus!" The curate groaned. The crescendo was boiling in him now, wonderful and frightening and exhilarating. Nothing could have prepared him for the warm embrace of a woman's mouth, the slight roughness of her tongue as she rolled it up and down his length. No porn, no fantasy could have approached the sensation of her lips gently drawing on his cock, coaxing him towards a peak of indescribable pleasure. The fire was in him and around him, consuming him and his thoughts until all that he was became the connection with her, his flesh and her mouth. Her hands cradled his cock gently as he built towards climax, his breathing becoming rapid and shallow."Oh,”"Let it come."Josh sighed deeply in relief as Jenna enveloped him again, shuddered as he felt himself swell between her lips, as he released himself to her, surrendered to her, spurting his cum. She lingered over his manhood, slowly coaxing him down from the heights of his ecstasy. She gently licked his shaft and kissed a drop of his essence from the tip, and smiled up at him."That wasn't so bad, was it?" She said, standing up. "Did you enjoy your first blowjob?""Jenna. Fucking hell!""I'll take that as a yes?""Yes!" he gasped."Oh good. Because we're not done yet. You don't get off that easily you know!" Jenna began unfastening her skirt, letting it fall to the floor. Josh's eyes widened. She wasn't wearing any panties.An old, battered table was in the middle of the storeroom. Jenna cleared it and reclined on it, spreading her legs and unfastening her blouse. No bra!"Your turn."Josh crossed himself."Just trust your instincts." She whispered, lowering herself onto her back. Josh stared at her for a second, dumbstruck by her beauty and timid as a deer. Her gently smiling face and the flowing red hair that framed it, the round fullness of her breasts, her long legs, and the tantalizing lure of her wet womanhood between,Finding his courage at last, Josh moved close. With a shaky hand he reached out and tentatively cupped her left breast. Tracing the nipple with his thumb, ever so gently."Mmm nice, Josh. Keep going!"Encouraged, Josh lowered his mouth to her other breast, the memory of the delightful sensations she'd given him earlier fresh in his mind. He felt her run her fingers through his short blonde hair as he tasted her with his tongue, heard her sigh as he closed his lips around her nipple."Gently now.""Sorry!"The curate feasted on her breasts for a bit longer, before moving down to her abdomen, planting more kisses, then he paused for a moment. Jenna said nothing, silently urging him to carry on, and he did. Tentatively, he kissed the inside of her thighs, tracing a finger through the trimmed hair above her slit.Josh continued to lovingly kiss her thighs, his nerves beginning to fade. The heady scent of her was overpowering, emboldening him to trail a finger between her cunt lips. The wetness he felt there surprised him, and he glanced up."You're doing great, Josh." Jenna answered in a throaty whisper. "Please don't stop."He ran a finger over her clit, causing her to let out a moan. Lowering his head, he caressed her softly with his mouth, tasting her."Oh Josh,” He suckled gently on her clit and she let out a scream."Jenna?" He pulled away from her, his fear returning. "Did I hurt you?""No Josh. It was incredible, that's all. When you licked me down there, wow. You sure know how to thrill a woman. You learn quick! But don't make me cum just yet. Because I want you inside me when it happens."Josh's heart leapt into his throat. "Oh,”"Are you ready?""Um, but protection, I-I don't have a condom,”"It's okay, you don't need to worry. I'm on the Pill.""Oh, right. Good,”"Think of this as doing God's work," Jenna purred, urging him to get on with it. She was eager to feel that virgin cock inside her.Slowly he positioned himself above her on the creaking table. Jenna took his cock in her hand, guiding him. He felt the head of his organ nestle inside her."Lord in Heaven!" It was such exquisite torture, fighting the urge to cum as fast as he could. The feel of her cunt as it sheathed him was beyond even the joys he'd felt already.At first, he slipped in and out of her slowly. He buried his face in her neck."Umm, oh God Josh. Yes! Go harder!"Jenna slowly relaxed her control, allowing him to work his cock in and out of her more forcefully. He thrust in deep, as far as he could, and gasped, savoring the sensation."Oh Josh, that's so good!"He speeded up, as she wrapped her legs round him. Soon he was pounding her like a pro."Jenna!" He could feel his climax coming now, a mighty force of almost Biblical proportions. Just as Jesus drove out many devils, Josh drove out his virginity, casting it aside forever. He'd been freed."Ugh!" With a roar of release the curate came, filling Jenna's womanhood with his seed. Josh wasn't sure how long his orgasm lasted. But he knew that it was wonderful, an epiphany of sensation, and that Jenna writhed and gasped in the throes of her own climax in perfect harmony with his.When they'd both calmed down, Jenna held him close and kissed him. "Are you okay? You were amazing, Josh, do you know that? How are you feeling?""Just fantastic, absolutely fantastic! I, wow. That was, incredible. Um, do you mind if I say a quick prayer for both of us?""Not at all. You go ahead."When he'd finished, he opened his eyes and looked at Jenna, who was smiling broadly. "You are going to become a bloody amazing vicar!" She said.An Erotic Dream & an organ lesson.T'was the Year of Our Lord 1739, and on a road bound for London, weary preacher and hymn writer Charles Wesley had just arrived at a tavern."Innkeeper! I hath been riding all day and my poor horse be in the great need of water and rest. As am I." Charles said."Fear thee not, good fellow, I'll tend to thine horse!" The innkeeper replied. "If it's a room for the night you're looking for, then ye hath come to the right place. Here at the Lamb Inn, there's always a warm greeting for a weary traveler. I'll leave ye in the capable hands of my fine wench Jen, who is adept at making gentlemen feel welcome,”"Greetings to you sir!" Jen said, and Charles was a little taken aback by this stunning redheaded wench. "If you'd like to follow me, I'll lead you to your bedchamber." She picked up a candle and gave him a seductive smirk."Gladly, Miss!" Charles replied, following her up the creaking wooden staircase. In the main room, sounds of merriment filled the air as many men supped ale and enjoyed the company of willing wenches."I see you're a man of faith, sir," said Jen as she reached the top of the stairs. "Have you travelled far?""Aye, all the way from Bristol. I write many hymns. I'm going to visit my older brother John, who's in London. He's a preacher too. In fact he,”"Oh gosh, of course! Your brother must be John Wesley, founder of that Methodist movement I keep hearin' about!""That's right! I'm Charles Wesley."Jen entered the bedchamber. "Here we are, Mr. Wesley. I trust the room is to your liking? This happens to be a new room - never been used before. Bed never slept in, chair never sat on, chamber pot never,”"Ah, glorious!" Charles interrupted her. "It looks most excellent. I am indeed blessed to have been afforded such kindness. God is good!""Mmm, thanks be to God," Jen replied, eyeing up Charles. He was young and rather attractive for a man of the cloth. Most of the clergy she'd encountered in her life had been very old men."There be a fresh jug of water on the table for you, Mr. Wesley. We're lucky here. The Lamb has a deep well which provides safe, clean water to drink. That's why we get so many visitors desperate to quench their thirst without worry of getting the flux."Charles nodded as he put his bag down on the chair and removed his black robe. That four poster bed looked so inviting."Why don't you sit on the bed, Mr. Wesley? I cannot help but wonder, after all that riding, do you not grow a little stiff?""Um, I am a little stiff, yes.""Then come over here and sit beside me." Jen said, patting the bed. "I'd be interested to hear about your hymn writing."Charles bashfully did as she asked. "Well right now, I am working on a "Hymn for Christmas Day." But I confess I have only written the first verse."Perchance could I hear this first verse?" Jen replied.Charles nodded."Hark how all the Welkin ringsGlory to the King of Kings,Peace on Earth, and Mercy mild,God and Sinners reconciled!""I'd say that's a marvelous first verse," said Jen. "Very stirring, very uplifting. It makes one, rise to the occasion." Her hand had somehow ended up on his thigh."Oh do you think so? That pleases me greatly, Miss! Now if only I could complete it."Jen removed her mobcap, revealing long, tumbling red locks. Charles gazed, mesmerized. "By all the saints, you're a pretty woman, Miss,”"Jen, Mr. Wesley, perhaps I can be of some help to you." She blew out the candle. "Oh my! Now we're in the dark. How careless of me! We'll just have to,”"Oh Miss Jen!" Charles gasped as her hand groped him in an intimate place."I think you've risen to the occasion Mr. Wesley!"A few moments later and the good wench had relieved the dear Mr. Wesley of his breeches and cast off the rest of his apparel, including a periwig. The preacher produced naked, stiff, and erect, a wonderful maypole. Jen put her hands to this fine example of maleness and her actions had the desired effect."Ah! I think my inspiration is returning!""I'm filled with joy, Mr. Wesley! Tis an honor to help you!""Joyful all ye Nations rise,Join the Triumph of the Skies,Universal Nature say"Christ the Lord is born to Day!""That's a wonderful second verse!" Jen ran her tongue round the preacher's erect member, before taking his entire length into her mouth."Oh Lord in Heaven, I have given in to sin, but if the sin results in a completed hymn, will thou look upon me with mercy?" Charles gasped, as the pleasure overwhelmed him.Jen withdrew. "The Lord will indeed pardon you, Mr. Wesley. Now please relax and enjoy my help!""Ah, oh my God, thine tongue is divine, it feels so good!"Jen sucked, licked and teased Charles' cock until he could take no more."Miss Jen! I'm going to spend! Oh, yes!""Ahh, I have been anointed by your holy essence, Mr. Wesley!" Jen giggled as she eagerly gobbled up his seed.Charles' face bore an expression of utter bliss and satisfaction. "Oh Miss Jen. I am so grateful God delivered me to this inn. What sweet pleasures you have afforded me this evening!"A furious knocking on the bedchamber door disturbed the blissful ambience."Jen! Jen! You need to get up!" a woman shouted."Is that, the innkeeper's wife?" Charles wondered, still dazed after his powerful orgasm.Jen licked the remaining cum off the preacher's softening cock. "Mm, sounds like Mother. But wait, Mother died of smallpox ten years ago, so how, ?"Everything seemed to fade away in a strange haze."Jen! You're going to be late for work! Wake up!"Jenna finally awoke. "Huh? What?""Are you alright?" Her mum shouted. "Answer me or I'm coming in.""Um yeah. I'm fine Mum!" She rolled over and reached for her smartphone. Squinting, she looked at the clock."Shit! I overslept!"Breakfast was a rushed affair, with Jenna barely able to drink half a cup of coffee and a piece of toast."For goodness cake, slow down before you choke on that," her mum said."Can't believe I overslept. I set my phone. I've never done that before." Jenna said."Hey, we all do it sometimes. Though your exertions at church no doubt kept you up late. Your dad and I noticed how much time you've been spending at St. Michael's. Now feel free to tell me to mind my own business, but what's with the sudden obsession with church? You've never been interested before. You used to laugh at Gran for being in the Mother's Union.""I guess the pandemic made me think about things differently," Jenna lied, trying to think up a good excuse. "I know I never attended church much before, but I never stopped being a believer.""That's great, Jen. I'm glad it makes you happy. I just hope you're not spending all your time with old people, though. It's good to mix with people your own age.""Oh there's a good mix of different ages at St Michael's. They're not all boomers, Mum. The curate, Yulia and Debbie aren't much different to me. And Reverend Morris, .he's amazing.""I'm sure he is," her mum replied, with a wry grin. "You out tonight?""Yes. Choir practice." Jenna grabbed her bag and car keys."By the way, who's Charles Wesley?""Um, what?""You were yelling his name over and over in your sleep. You must've been dreaming.""Oh. Well he's a guy who wrote a lot of great hymns. He lived in the 18th century. He wrote that famous carol "Hark the Herald Angels Sing", although the original words were different. Gotta go. Love you. Bye!"Jenna's mum shook her head. "Charles Wesley? When I was growing up, I used to dream about Brad Pitt.""I have got to get a place of my own," Jenna muttered to herself as she headed to the car. "That was cringe."Jenna had prepared herself for her evening "choir practice" with Gordon, by wearing her best lingerie and a sexy dress that perfectly highlighted her curves and cleavage. The organist himself had also made an effort, by wearing his best suit and tie. With his black robe unfastened, he resembled an old-fashioned headmaster."Hello there!" Gordon said, grinning from ear to ear. Whoa, she looked drop-dead gorgeous. He was practically drooling like a dog in heat."Not so bad yourself, Gordon!" Jenna replied. "Love the suit. Now all you need is a cane.""A cane?""To punish me with. You see, I've been a naughty girl. I forgot to practice that piece of music you mentioned.""Oh dearie me," Gordon said, walking over to her. "Whatever am I to do with such a naughty girl? Never mind. I'm sure you can make it up to me some way,”He sat down on the organ stool. "Come sit in my lap, Jenna. We're going to play a little tune together. I'm sure you can do it.""Why Gordon, I'm not sure I can play this. It's a bit of a step up from the piano.""Just give it a try. I'm sure you'll learn quick!" He winked. "Try the third manual," he added, indicating one of the keyboards.Jenna bit her lip and slid onto Gordon's lap. She deliberated wiggled about a bit, causing him to let out a groan. "This seat is a little, hard!"Jenna began playing the first few notes. "You're right, Kings and Queens does sound fantastic on a pipe organ. I'd have never guessed you were an Ava Max fan, Gordon.""Hah, I'm not. Can't stand modern pop music. But the younger members of the choir are always begging for this song. You're great at this!"As Jenna continued to play, Gordon began massaging her breasts and kissing her exposed neck."Oh Gordon," Jenna sighed."There's a part-time job available,” he continued, between kisses. "An assistant choirmaster and pianist at the Sunday school. Three days a week. The school isn't just open on Sundays anymore. There's a crèche and breakfast club on Wednesdays. They do after-school sessions for kids who have special needs. It's not bad money. I know you've got all the relevant qualifications. If you're interested, I could easily pull a few strings and get you in."Jenna suddenly halted her playing. "Wow, are you serious?""Of course I am. Look, the young 'uns think I'm some kind of ogre. And they're probably right. But you, you'd be such an asset to the school. And tell me honestly, do you truly enjoy working in a call center?""I hate it. The pay is shit and I hate my boss. Now she's a real-life ogre.""Exactly. Your talents are wasted in a dead-end job like that, Jenna. It's up to you of course, but please give it some thought."She turned round to face him. Kissing him hard the lips, she slipped her arms round his shoulders. "I've given it thought. I accept! Now why don't you let me thank you properly, Gordon?"Jenna hiked up her dress, and unfastened Gordon's belt. She unzipped his trousers, pushed down his underpants, and his rock hard erection sprang free from its encumbrance. Unable to contain himself any longer, Gordon pulled aside the crotch of her damp panties, positioned himself to her entrance, and pushed himself into her. The soft lips between her legs parted, and she threw her head back in sudden ecstasy as the organist began thrusting himself in and out of her warm body, slowly at first, then building in speed.Outside, a black 4 by 4 had just pulled up in the church car park. John Norris got out of the driver's side and furiously slammed the door shut."John please, don't do this!" his wife pleaded. "Not in the church!""Look Patricia, I want to get to the bottom of this. First Gordon angrily accuses me of spreading lies on Facebook. He called me "the biggest shit-stirrer in this church" to my face! Now the chaps at the Rotary Club have frozen me out. They said I've been making sexist jokes and racist comments about Ukrainians! I ask you, when have I ever made a racist comment? I haven't a racist bone in my body! And I've never signed up to Facebook either. Someone is trying to smear my name. If you ask me, Gordon's the one behind it all! Well, we'll see what he has to say, man-to-man."A look of horror swept Mrs. Norris' face. "You can't go in there! I can hear the organ - the choir are in there!""I don't care if the whole bloody town is in there!" John yelled, a display of anger that was most unlike him. "This has gone too far. I can't believe Gordon could be so vindictive. He'd a bad-tempered sod, but I never thought he'd do this. Libel is a serious offence."He stormed into the church and marched down the aisle, his panicking wife rushing after him."Alright alright, it wasn't Gordon. It was me!" She grabbed his arm. He halted."What?""I did it."John shook his head. "Why are you trying to protect him? Do you fancy him or something? Is there more to this?""No! No of course I don't! Look, I signed up to Facebook so I could access the church page but I used your name. I know I shouldn't have but, well surely you must know how members of this church treat me? I'd have been blocked immediately!"John's face had gone through several shades of red and was now the color of raw steak."You, Did what? You've been spreading lies and racist comments using an account with my name? What the hell am I married to?" He walked round the side of the organ. "Bloody hell!"Mrs. Norris shoved him aside, wondering what had shocked him. "That's her! She's the one who's caused all this! The little tart! She's bringing filth and depravity to this church!"John glared at his wife. "I'd say your own venom has done that already, Patricia." He turned and stormed off. "I'm going home. To pack a few things. I'm going to stay at my brother's for a bit. And you, well you can go to Hell.""Gordon, do you hear somebody shouting?" Jenna sighed as she felt his warm cum fill her."Probably just a bit of rowdy teen behavior outside," Gordon replied with a smirk.To be continued.By Blacksheep, for Literotica.
What if the secret to becoming healthier and more fulfilled was to embrace what you're afraid of. If you start to embrace fear in 2025, you will be rewarded with better health, wealth, and love. In the first video of the year, I'm sharing why it's time to “drop the rope” and do the climb without a safety net as Bruce did in the Dark Knight Rises—a message I'm giving myself as well. — Episode Chapter Big Ideas (timing may not be exact) — 00:00 — Introduction 00:59 — Scene Breakdown 03:50 — Lessons from the Scene 06:08 — The Importance of Fear 09:31 — Actionable Takeaways 11:55 — Conclusion + Call to Action — Connect with Julian and Executive Health — LinkedIn — https://www.linkedin.com/in/julianhayesii/ X — https://x.com/thejulianhayes Ready to take your health, leadership, and performance to the next level? Book a complimentary executive health chemistry meeting with Julian Hayes II. Link below. https://calendly.com/julian-exechealth/chemistry Website — https://www.executivehealth.io/
The Curate loses his virginity. By Blacksheep. Listen to the Podcast at Steamy Stories. At this Sunday's service, there was much talk of the upcoming harvest festival. Members of the congregation were encouraged to donate fruit and vegetables, along with non-perishable items for the local food bank. Jenna had made an effort and brought along a bag of apples. She placed the bag on the side table in the church hall. "I don't know how a brazen hussy like you has the cheek to set foot in a church."Jenna remained calm, as she turned to face Mrs. Norris. "Well I'm a Christian, the same as you." "Huh! Christian my foot. I saw what you and the organist were getting up to and I think it's disgusting! In the church of all places! And he's old enough to be your father!" "Well if you clutch those pearls of yours any tighter they'll crumble to dust. And Gordon and I happen to be consenting adults. Single consenting adults. So there." "Why you, you, .horrid little slag!" Mrs. Norris fumed, lip quivering. She stormed off. Jenna exhaled and rolled her eyes. "Coffee or tea?" a friendlier voice asked. It was Debbie, the Sunday school teacher, who was volunteering to do today's hot drinks rota in the hall. "Tea please," Jenna replied. "You okay?" "Yeah. I don't think I'll be on her Christmas card list." "Don't let that old bag get to you. She's a nasty one. She's horribly ageist. Not to mention xenophobic too. I overheard her mocking Yulia's English skills last week. I can't stand her. Her husband's not that bad, he's a tedious fusspot, but there's no malice in him. But her, she's poison." "I heard her hubby spreads gossip on Facebook." Jenna said. "More likely that's her doing." Debbie replied. "I'd be surprised if John Norris even knows how to switch on a laptop." A brief chill ran through Jenna. What if Mrs. Norris were to post some bile about her online? "I don't use social media anymore," she said. "Briefly poked my nose into Twitter as a teen, but didn't like the pile-ons." "Wise. I'm on Facebook, but only to keep up with church stuff. I never post anything about my private life. I imagine Mrs. Norris would have a stroke if she knew I was dating a woman. A married woman at that. Keep it to yourself. I'm not ready to come out yet." "Don't worry, I won't say a word." Jenna sipped her tea quietly as she observed the other members of the congregation file into the hall. She was hoping Reverend Morris would soon arrive, but after fifteen minutes, there was still no sign of him. Then there was Gordon; he never came into the hall after a service, and he'd sent her that amusing text message on Friday, about Charles Wesley and his "bulging hymn book." She headed out of the hall, in search of Gordon, when Josh the curate came staggering in, carrying a massive pile of hymn books. He almost collided with Jenna and dropped a couple of books. "Oh! I'm so sorry!" Josh stammered. "How clumsy of me." Jenna bent down and picked up the books. "You're loaded up like a pack horse. Let me give you a hand. Where are you taking all these?" "Um. So kind!" His pale cheeks went pink. "The storeroom at the far end of the hall. These are spare hymn books." "Ok. Lead the way. By the way, you haven't seen the vicar have you?"" "Oh, he and the organist are in a meeting. One of the organ pipes has just been repaired." "Damn," Jenna muttered under her breath. "Oh dear. How sad. I guess he'll miss his tea and biscuits." She followed Josh down to the storeroom. She'd never paid much attention to the curate before, but looking at him now, she realized that he was rather cute. Mid-twenties, tall and stocky with fair hair and a chubby face. There was an endearing innocence about him. Reverend Morris had said he was hoping to complete his ordination next year and become a fully-fledged vicar. He'd been impressed by his devotion to the church - but he needed to come out of his shell a bit and interact more with worshippers. Josh was a shy man and lacking in self-confidence. Remembering this information made Jenna smile. I think this innocent curate needs some other kind of help, The storeroom was vast, and crammed from floor to ceiling with box files, books, old furniture and plastic crates. "Holy sh,, I didn't know this room existed. And what a lot of stuff for one small church!" Jenna exclaimed. "Heh, yeah." Josh said, putting the books down. "It's not just for St Michael's. We share it with St John's and the Methodist church on Oakwood Road." Jenna began putting the books on the shelf. "Um you don't need to do that,” "Jenna." Josh blushed again. "Jenna. It's kind of you to do that but,” "Oh I don't mind. Why should you have to do all the donkey work? This room is a tip. Besides, a good Christian should help others, right? Especially the vicar's right-hand man. That's what a curate is, yes?" Josh relaxed a bit. "Pretty much, yeah. Like Batman and Robin." "Have you always wanted to be a curate?" Josh sat down on a stool. "In truth, no way. I wasn't religious at all when I was a kid. I suffered from crippling shyness. I used to dread being asked to read in front of the class. When I was ten, my dad walked out, and that affected me a lot. Haven't seen him since. Mum turned to drink, I relied on my grandad for support. He became a father figure to me. He used to be a vicar. Thanks to him I survived my teens and passed my exams. I was eighteen when he died. That's when I decided I wanted to follow in his footsteps. Without him - and God, I fear, well I may have gone down a dark path. Got in with a bad crowd. Taken drugs, self-harmed, maybe ended up in jail." "Wow." Jenna replied, realizing how cosseted and safe her upbringing had been. "Well I'm so glad your grandad was there for you." "There are still days when I doubt myself and I'm in a bad place. I feel useless." "Don't put yourself down," Jenna said, walking towards him. "You're an amazing role model, especially for younger people." Josh blinked. "You, think so?" "I do. Plus, you're really cute. Has a girl ever told you that before?" Josh blushed. "Err, no-one except my Nan. I don't think she counts." "Women round here must be blind," Jenna added, making him squirm with embarrassment. She leant forward and planted a kiss on his lips. He trembled, cheeks turning redder. "J-Jenna, don't,” "It's alright Josh. You're not committing a sin or anything. We're not inside the church, if that's you're worried about." "N-no, it's not that. I, um,” The curate sighed. "I, I'm just scared of, I don't know if I can, do this." She already knew he was single and straight, but decided to question him. "Do you have a girlfriend?" "No, but, um, that's the problem really. I'd like one, but I wouldn't know how to tell her,” Jenna stroked his arm. "Tell her what?" "I worry she'd laugh at me." "Josh. Whatever it is, I promise I would never laugh at you. And I will understand." He looked down. "Shit. I'm twenty-five. And I'm still a virgin! I've never gone beyond kissing a girl." She kissed his cheek again. "Oh Josh. That's nothing to feel awkward about. In fact I admire you. In this age when we're bombarded with over-sexualized imagery 24/7 both online and offline, finding someone who's chosen to wait is pretty awesome in my opinion. I lost mine just days after reaching the age of consent. I couldn't wait to lose it. But that's just me,” "Yeah but, I, um,” She pulled him to his feet and gently coaxed the truth out of him. "You want to lose your virginity, yes?" "More than anything. But, dating today is scary. It's a minefield. Especially after Me Too. I'm afraid. I don't want to say the wrong thing and come across as some horny creep,” Jenna held back a chuckle. Mrs. Norris probably thinks of me as a horny creep. She thought. "I get that. But trust me. I don't think a sweet, kind-hearted man of God like you could ever be a creep. Horny yes, nothing wrong with that of course." She winked at him and he gulped. "How about it? I think you're ready right now." His eyes widened. "W-what? Here?" "Why not? It's nice and private, And you're a really sexy curate!" Her face was just inches from his own, hovering there. Then her lips were on his, dancing there softly for a moment before pulling away. "Jenna,” He was already rock hard, and hoped his cassock had disguised this fact. "Shush. You're very special." She whispered, barely audible. "You're warm, caring, You're strong. You deserve to be experience the joys of the flesh." She kissed him again. It's okay to feel nervous. First time is always a bit nerve-racking. But just relax. You'll be just fine,” What an adorable lamb to the slaughter, Jenna thought to herself. He's so scared and unsure. I've never seduced a virgin before, so I'd better not go too hard on him. I do love a challenge. With a bit of encouragement, this sweet guy could have real potential. The touch of her lips sent a fire through his body, a jolt that brought a tingle to every micron of his skin. "Oh, Jenna!" "Shhh." Her lips caressed his own, then his nose, his ear. "Don't talk just now, okay?" "Mmm?" She kissed him again, gently caressing his upper lip between her own. At last, he responded. "Josh." Jenna smiled cheekily. "You're a pretty good kisser, you know that?" "Really?" Just relax. I'm not going anywhere, there's no rush. All we have to do is discover each other. There's no hurry. No-one's going to come in here. I imagine the vicar will be busy for ages." Jenna ran her hand down the front of his black cassock. "Oh my, you're more than ready. "Let's get these buttons unfastened." She knelt before him, opening the cassock and revealing the black trousers underneath. And another straining crotch bulge. "I'm going to worship you," she whispered, unbuckling his belt and unzipping his trousers. Josh was wearing plain black briefs underneath. It was fun seeing the different types of undies men wore. First there was Reverend Morris with his "holy boxers," then Gordon and his sensible white y-fronts, now Josh with smart black tight-fitting briefs. "Everything will be fine. I promise. Close your eyes if it makes you feel better, okay?" The curate hesitated still, but Jenna's smile was reassuring and gentle. "I promise you'll like it." With a shudder, Josh squeezed his eyes tight as his trousers and underwear were lowered, and he could feel the cool air of the room, then Jenna's warm breath on his manhood. "There we are." He couldn't resist a peek, through half-closed eyes. He was painfully stiff, of course, harder than he'd ever been in his life, but he didn't need his eyes to tell him that. He shivered as Jenna ran her hand through his pubes and stooped to kiss him there. He gasped as her smooth palm encircled him. "Oh my God!" "Mmm. So beautiful. Truly God's gift to women. Just relax, don't fight the feeling. Isn't it nice?" Jenna kissed the very tip of his member, and he gasped and moaned, his muscles tensing. "Don't fight it now Josh, just let the feelings come. Relax and let it take you. You don't have to hold it back, just let it come." With that, she closed her lips around his head, tasted him with her tongue. "Uh! Oh Jesus!" The curate groaned. The crescendo was boiling in him now, wonderful and frightening and exhilarating. Nothing could have prepared him for the warm embrace of a woman's mouth, the slight roughness of her tongue as she rolled it up and down his length. No porn, no fantasy could have approached the sensation of her lips gently drawing on his cock, coaxing him towards a peak of indescribable pleasure. The fire was in him and around him, consuming him and his thoughts until all that he was became the connection with her, his flesh and her mouth. Her hands cradled his cock gently as he built towards climax, his breathing becoming rapid and shallow. "Oh,” "Let it come." Josh sighed deeply in relief as Jenna enveloped him again, shuddered as he felt himself swell between her lips, as he released himself to her, surrendered to her, spurting his cum. She lingered over his manhood, slowly coaxing him down from the heights of his ecstasy. She gently licked his shaft and kissed a drop of his essence from the tip, and smiled up at him. "That wasn't so bad, was it?" She said, standing up. "Did you enjoy your first blowjob?" "Jenna. Fucking hell!" "I'll take that as a yes?" "Yes!" he gasped. "Oh good. Because we're not done yet. You don't get off that easily you know!" Jenna began unfastening her skirt, letting it fall to the floor. Josh's eyes widened. She wasn't wearing any panties. An old, battered table was in the middle of the storeroom. Jenna cleared it and reclined on it, spreading her legs and unfastening her blouse. No bra! "Your turn." Josh crossed himself. "Just trust your instincts." She whispered, lowering herself onto her back. Josh stared at her for a second, dumbstruck by her beauty and timid as a deer. Her gently smiling face and the flowing red hair that framed it, the round fullness of her breasts, her long legs, and the tantalizing lure of her wet womanhood between, Finding his courage at last, Josh moved close. With a shaky hand he reached out and tentatively cupped her left breast. Tracing the nipple with his thumb, ever so gently. "Mmm nice, Josh. Keep going!" Encouraged, Josh lowered his mouth to her other breast, the memory of the delightful sensations she'd given him earlier fresh in his mind. He felt her run her fingers through his short blonde hair as he tasted her with his tongue, heard her sigh as he closed his lips around her nipple. "Gently now." "Sorry!" The curate feasted on her breasts for a bit longer, before moving down to her abdomen, planting more kisses, then he paused for a moment. Jenna said nothing, silently urging him to carry on, and he did. Tentatively, he kissed the inside of her thighs, tracing a finger through the trimmed hair above her slit. Josh continued to lovingly kiss her thighs, his nerves beginning to fade. The heady scent of her was overpowering, emboldening him to trail a finger between her cunt lips. The wetness he felt there surprised him, and he glanced up. "You're doing great, Josh." Jenna answered in a throaty whisper. "Please don't stop." He ran a finger over her clit, causing her to let out a moan. Lowering his head, he caressed her softly with his mouth, tasting her. "Oh Josh,” He suckled gently on her clit and she let out a scream. "Jenna?" He pulled away from her, his fear returning. "Did I hurt you?" "No Josh. It was incredible, that's all. When you licked me down there, wow. You sure know how to thrill a woman. You learn quick! But don't make me cum just yet. Because I want you inside me when it happens." Josh's heart leapt into his throat. "Oh,” "Are you ready?" "Um, but protection, I-I don't have a condom,” "It's okay, you don't need to worry. I'm on the Pill." "Oh, right. Good,” "Think of this as doing God's work," Jenna purred, urging him to get on with it. She was eager to feel that virgin cock inside her. Slowly he positioned himself above her on the creaking table. Jenna took his cock in her hand, guiding him. He felt the head of his organ nestle inside her. "Lord in Heaven!" It was such exquisite torture, fighting the urge to cum as fast as he could. The feel of her cunt as it sheathed him was beyond even the joys he'd felt already. At first, he slipped in and out of her slowly. He buried his face in her neck. "Umm, oh God Josh. Yes! Go harder!" Jenna slowly relaxed her control, allowing him to work his cock in and out of her more forcefully. He thrust in deep, as far as he could, and gasped, savoring the sensation. "Oh Josh, that's so good!" He speeded up, as she wrapped her legs round him. Soon he was pounding her like a pro. "Jenna!" He could feel his climax coming now, a mighty force of almost Biblical proportions. Just as Jesus drove out many devils, Josh drove out his virginity, casting it aside forever. He'd been freed. "Ugh!" With a roar of release the curate came, filling Jenna's womanhood with his seed. Josh wasn't sure how long his orgasm lasted. But he knew that it was wonderful, an epiphany of sensation, and that Jenna writhed and gasped in the throes of her own climax in perfect harmony with his. When they'd both calmed down, Jenna held him close and kissed him. "Are you okay? You were amazing, Josh, do you know that? How are you feeling?" "Just fantastic, absolutely fantastic! I, wow. That was, incredible. Um, do you mind if I say a quick prayer for both of us?" "Not at all. You go ahead." When he'd finished, he opened his eyes and looked at Jenna, who was smiling broadly. "You are going to become a bloody amazing vicar!" She said. An Erotic Dream & an organ lesson. T'was the Year of Our Lord 1739, and on a road bound for London, weary preacher and hymn writer Charles Wesley had just arrived at a tavern. "Innkeeper! I hath been riding all day and my poor horse be in the great need of water and rest. As am I." Charles said. "Fear thee not, good fellow, I'll tend to thine horse!" The innkeeper replied. "If it's a room for the night you're looking for, then ye hath come to the right place. Here at the Lamb Inn, there's always a warm greeting for a weary traveler. I'll leave ye in the capable hands of my fine wench Jen, who is adept at making gentlemen feel welcome,” "Greetings to you sir!" Jen said, and Charles was a little taken aback by this stunning redheaded wench. "If you'd like to follow me, I'll lead you to your bedchamber." She picked up a candle and gave him a seductive smirk. "Gladly, Miss!" Charles replied, following her up the creaking wooden staircase. In the main room, sounds of merriment filled the air as many men supped ale and enjoyed the company of willing wenches. "I see you're a man of faith, sir," said Jen as she reached the top of the stairs. "Have you travelled far?" "Aye, all the way from Bristol. I write many hymns. I'm going to visit my older brother John, who's in London. He's a preacher too. In fact he,” "Oh gosh, of course! Your brother must be John Wesley, founder of that Methodist movement I keep hearin' about!" "That's right! I'm Charles Wesley." Jen entered the bedchamber. "Here we are, Mr. Wesley. I trust the room is to your liking? This happens to be a new room - never been used before. Bed never slept in, chair never sat on, chamber pot never,” "Ah, glorious!" Charles interrupted her. "It looks most excellent. I am indeed blessed to have been afforded such kindness. God is good!" "Mmm, thanks be to God," Jen replied, eyeing up Charles. He was young and rather attractive for a man of the cloth. Most of the clergy she'd encountered in her life had been very old men. "There be a fresh jug of water on the table for you, Mr. Wesley. We're lucky here. The Lamb has a deep well which provides safe, clean water to drink. That's why we get so many visitors desperate to quench their thirst without worry of getting the flux." Charles nodded as he put his bag down on the chair and removed his black robe. That four poster bed looked so inviting. "Why don't you sit on the bed, Mr. Wesley? I cannot help but wonder, after all that riding, do you not grow a little stiff?" "Um, I am a little stiff, yes." "Then come over here and sit beside me." Jen said, patting the bed. "I'd be interested to hear about your hymn writing." Charles bashfully did as she asked. "Well right now, I am working on a "Hymn for Christmas Day." But I confess I have only written the first verse. "Perchance could I hear this first verse?" Jen replied. Charles nodded. "Hark how all the Welkin rings Glory to the King of Kings, Peace on Earth, and Mercy mild, God and Sinners reconciled!" "I'd say that's a marvelous first verse," said Jen. "Very stirring, very uplifting. It makes one, rise to the occasion." Her hand had somehow ended up on his thigh. "Oh do you think so? That pleases me greatly, Miss! Now if only I could complete it." Jen removed her mobcap, revealing long, tumbling red locks. Charles gazed, mesmerized. "By all the saints, you're a pretty woman, Miss,” "Jen, Mr. Wesley, perhaps I can be of some help to you." She blew out the candle. "Oh my! Now we're in the dark. How careless of me! We'll just have to,” "Oh Miss Jen!" Charles gasped as her hand groped him in an intimate place. "I think you've risen to the occasion Mr. Wesley!" A few moments later and the good wench had relieved the dear Mr. Wesley of his breeches and cast off the rest of his apparel, including a periwig. The preacher produced naked, stiff, and erect, a wonderful maypole. Jen put her hands to this fine example of maleness and her actions had the desired effect. "Ah! I think my inspiration is returning!" "I'm filled with joy, Mr. Wesley! Tis an honor to help you!" "Joyful all ye Nations rise, Join the Triumph of the Skies, Universal Nature say "Christ the Lord is born to Day!" "That's a wonderful second verse!" Jen ran her tongue round the preacher's erect member, before taking his entire length into her mouth. "Oh Lord in Heaven, I have given in to sin, but if the sin results in a completed hymn, will thou look upon me with mercy?" Charles gasped, as the pleasure overwhelmed him. Jen withdrew. "The Lord will indeed pardon you, Mr. Wesley. Now please relax and enjoy my help!" "Ah, oh my God, thine tongue is divine, it feels so good!" Jen sucked, licked and teased Charles' cock until he could take no more. "Miss Jen! I'm going to spend! Oh, yes!" "Ahh, I have been anointed by your holy essence, Mr. Wesley!" Jen giggled as she eagerly gobbled up his seed. Charles' face bore an expression of utter bliss and satisfaction. "Oh Miss Jen. I am so grateful God delivered me to this inn. What sweet pleasures you have afforded me this evening!" A furious knocking on the bedchamber door disturbed the blissful ambience. "Jen! Jen! You need to get up!" a woman shouted. "Is that, the innkeeper's wife?" Charles wondered, still dazed after his powerful orgasm. Jen licked the remaining cum off the preacher's softening cock. "Mm, sounds like Mother. But wait, Mother died of smallpox ten years ago, so how, ?" Everything seemed to fade away in a strange haze. "Jen! You're going to be late for work! Wake up!" Jenna finally awoke. "Huh? What?" "Are you alright?" Her mum shouted. "Answer me or I'm coming in." "Um yeah. I'm fine Mum!" She rolled over and reached for her smartphone. Squinting, she looked at the clock. "Shit! I overslept!" Breakfast was a rushed affair, with Jenna barely able to drink half a cup of coffee and a piece of toast. "For goodness cake, slow down before you choke on that," her mum said. "Can't believe I overslept. I set my phone. I've never done that before." Jenna said. "Hey, we all do it sometimes. Though your exertions at church no doubt kept you up late. Your dad and I noticed how much time you've been spending at St. Michael's. Now feel free to tell me to mind my own business, but what's with the sudden obsession with church? You've never been interested before. You used to laugh at Gran for being in the Mother's Union." "I guess the pandemic made me think about things differently," Jenna lied, trying to think up a good excuse. "I know I never attended church much before, but I never stopped being a believer." "That's great, Jen. I'm glad it makes you happy. I just hope you're not spending all your time with old people, though. It's good to mix with people your own age." "Oh there's a good mix of different ages at St Michael's. They're not all boomers, Mum. The curate, Yulia and Debbie aren't much different to me. And Reverend Morris, .he's amazing." "I'm sure he is," her mum replied, with a wry grin. "You out tonight?" "Yes. Choir practice." Jenna grabbed her bag and car keys. "By the way, who's Charles Wesley?" "Um, what?" "You were yelling his name over and over in your sleep. You must've been dreaming." "Oh. Well he's a guy who wrote a lot of great hymns. He lived in the 18th century. He wrote that famous carol "Hark the Herald Angels Sing", although the original words were different. Gotta go. Love you. Bye!" Jenna's mum shook her head. "Charles Wesley? When I was growing up, I used to dream about Brad Pitt." "I have got to get a place of my own," Jenna muttered to herself as she headed to the car. "That was cringe." Jenna had prepared herself for her evening "choir practice" with Gordon, by wearing her best lingerie and a sexy dress that perfectly highlighted her curves and cleavage. The organist himself had also made an effort, by wearing his best suit and tie. With his black robe unfastened, he resembled an old-fashioned headmaster. "Hello there!" Gordon said, grinning from ear to ear. Whoa, she looked drop-dead gorgeous. He was practically drooling like a dog in heat. "Not so bad yourself, Gordon!" Jenna replied. "Love the suit. Now all you need is a cane." "A cane?" "To punish me with. You see, I've been a naughty girl. I forgot to practice that piece of music you mentioned." "Oh dearie me," Gordon said, walking over to her. "Whatever am I to do with such a naughty girl? Never mind. I'm sure you can make it up to me some way,” He sat down on the organ stool. "Come sit in my lap, Jenna. We're going to play a little tune together. I'm sure you can do it." "Why Gordon, I'm not sure I can play this. It's a bit of a step up from the piano." "Just give it a try. I'm sure you'll learn quick!" He winked. "Try the third manual," he added, indicating one of the keyboards. Jenna bit her lip and slid onto Gordon's lap. She deliberated wiggled about a bit, causing him to let out a groan. "This seat is a little, hard!" Jenna began playing the first few notes. "You're right, Kings and Queens does sound fantastic on a pipe organ. I'd have never guessed you were an Ava Max fan, Gordon." "Hah, I'm not. Can't stand modern pop music. But the younger members of the choir are always begging for this song. You're great at this!" As Jenna continued to play, Gordon began massaging her breasts and kissing her exposed neck. "Oh Gordon," Jenna sighed. "There's a part-time job available,” he continued, between kisses. "An assistant choirmaster and pianist at the Sunday school. Three days a week. The school isn't just open on Sundays anymore. There's a crèche and breakfast club on Wednesdays. They do after-school sessions for kids who have special needs. It's not bad money. I know you've got all the relevant qualifications. If you're interested, I could easily pull a few strings and get you in." Jenna suddenly halted her playing. "Wow, are you serious?" "Of course I am. Look, the young 'uns think I'm some kind of ogre. And they're probably right. But you, you'd be such an asset to the school. And tell me honestly, do you truly enjoy working in a call center?" "I hate it. The pay is shit and I hate my boss. Now she's a real-life ogre." "Exactly. Your talents are wasted in a dead-end job like that, Jenna. It's up to you of course, but please give it some thought." She turned round to face him. Kissing him hard the lips, she slipped her arms round his shoulders. "I've given it thought. I accept! Now why don't you let me thank you properly, Gordon?" Jenna hiked up her dress, and unfastened Gordon's belt. She unzipped his trousers, pushed down his underpants, and his rock hard erection sprang free from its encumbrance. Unable to contain himself any longer, Gordon pulled aside the crotch of her damp panties, positioned himself to her entrance, and pushed himself into her. The soft lips between her legs parted, and she threw her head back in sudden ecstasy as the organist began thrusting himself in and out of her warm body, slowly at first, then building in speed. Outside, a black 4 by 4 had just pulled up in the church car park. John Norris got out of the driver's side and furiously slammed the door shut. "John please, don't do this!" his wife pleaded. "Not in the church!" "Look Patricia, I want to get to the bottom of this. First Gordon angrily accuses me of spreading lies on Facebook. He called me "the biggest shit-stirrer in this church" to my face! Now the chaps at the Rotary Club have frozen me out. They said I've been making sexist jokes and racist comments about Ukrainians! I ask you, when have I ever made a racist comment? I haven't a racist bone in my body! And I've never signed up to Facebook either. Someone is trying to smear my name. If you ask me, Gordon's the one behind it all! Well, we'll see what he has to say, man-to-man." A look of horror swept Mrs. Norris' face. "You can't go in there! I can hear the organ - the choir are in there!" "I don't care if the whole bloody town is in there!" John yelled, a display of anger that was most unlike him. "This has gone too far. I can't believe Gordon could be so vindictive. He'd a bad-tempered sod, but I never thought he'd do this. Libel is a serious offence." He stormed into the church and marched down the aisle, his panicking wife rushing after him. "Alright alright, it wasn't Gordon. It was me!" She grabbed his arm. He halted. "What?" "I did it." John shook his head. "Why are you trying to protect him? Do you fancy him or something? Is there more to this?" "No! No of course I don't! Look, I signed up to Facebook so I could access the church page but I used your name. I know I shouldn't have but, well surely you must know how members of this church treat me? I'd have been blocked immediately!" John's face had gone through several shades of red and was now the color of raw steak. "You, Did what? You've been spreading lies and racist comments using an account with my name? What the hell am I married to?" He walked round the side of the organ. "Bloody hell!" Mrs. Norris shoved him aside, wondering what had shocked him. "That's her! She's the one who's caused all this! The little tart! She's bringing filth and depravity to this church!" John glared at his wife. "I'd say your own venom has done that already, Patricia." He turned and stormed off. "I'm going home. To pack a few things. I'm going to stay at my brother's for a bit. And you, well you can go to Hell." "Gordon, do you hear somebody shouting?" Jenna sighed as she felt his warm cum fill her. "Probably just a bit of rowdy teen behavior outside," Gordon replied with a smirk. To be continued. By Blacksheep, for Literotica.
The Curate loses his virginity. By Blacksheep. Listen to the Podcast at Steamy Stories. At this Sunday's service, there was much talk of the upcoming harvest festival. Members of the congregation were encouraged to donate fruit and vegetables, along with non-perishable items for the local food bank. Jenna had made an effort and brought along a bag of apples. She placed the bag on the side table in the church hall. "I don't know how a brazen hussy like you has the cheek to set foot in a church."Jenna remained calm, as she turned to face Mrs. Norris. "Well I'm a Christian, the same as you." "Huh! Christian my foot. I saw what you and the organist were getting up to and I think it's disgusting! In the church of all places! And he's old enough to be your father!" "Well if you clutch those pearls of yours any tighter they'll crumble to dust. And Gordon and I happen to be consenting adults. Single consenting adults. So there." "Why you, you, .horrid little slag!" Mrs. Norris fumed, lip quivering. She stormed off. Jenna exhaled and rolled her eyes. "Coffee or tea?" a friendlier voice asked. It was Debbie, the Sunday school teacher, who was volunteering to do today's hot drinks rota in the hall. "Tea please," Jenna replied. "You okay?" "Yeah. I don't think I'll be on her Christmas card list." "Don't let that old bag get to you. She's a nasty one. She's horribly ageist. Not to mention xenophobic too. I overheard her mocking Yulia's English skills last week. I can't stand her. Her husband's not that bad, he's a tedious fusspot, but there's no malice in him. But her, she's poison." "I heard her hubby spreads gossip on Facebook." Jenna said. "More likely that's her doing." Debbie replied. "I'd be surprised if John Norris even knows how to switch on a laptop." A brief chill ran through Jenna. What if Mrs. Norris were to post some bile about her online? "I don't use social media anymore," she said. "Briefly poked my nose into Twitter as a teen, but didn't like the pile-ons." "Wise. I'm on Facebook, but only to keep up with church stuff. I never post anything about my private life. I imagine Mrs. Norris would have a stroke if she knew I was dating a woman. A married woman at that. Keep it to yourself. I'm not ready to come out yet." "Don't worry, I won't say a word." Jenna sipped her tea quietly as she observed the other members of the congregation file into the hall. She was hoping Reverend Morris would soon arrive, but after fifteen minutes, there was still no sign of him. Then there was Gordon; he never came into the hall after a service, and he'd sent her that amusing text message on Friday, about Charles Wesley and his "bulging hymn book." She headed out of the hall, in search of Gordon, when Josh the curate came staggering in, carrying a massive pile of hymn books. He almost collided with Jenna and dropped a couple of books. "Oh! I'm so sorry!" Josh stammered. "How clumsy of me." Jenna bent down and picked up the books. "You're loaded up like a pack horse. Let me give you a hand. Where are you taking all these?" "Um. So kind!" His pale cheeks went pink. "The storeroom at the far end of the hall. These are spare hymn books." "Ok. Lead the way. By the way, you haven't seen the vicar have you?"" "Oh, he and the organist are in a meeting. One of the organ pipes has just been repaired." "Damn," Jenna muttered under her breath. "Oh dear. How sad. I guess he'll miss his tea and biscuits." She followed Josh down to the storeroom. She'd never paid much attention to the curate before, but looking at him now, she realized that he was rather cute. Mid-twenties, tall and stocky with fair hair and a chubby face. There was an endearing innocence about him. Reverend Morris had said he was hoping to complete his ordination next year and become a fully-fledged vicar. He'd been impressed by his devotion to the church - but he needed to come out of his shell a bit and interact more with worshippers. Josh was a shy man and lacking in self-confidence. Remembering this information made Jenna smile. I think this innocent curate needs some other kind of help, The storeroom was vast, and crammed from floor to ceiling with box files, books, old furniture and plastic crates. "Holy sh,, I didn't know this room existed. And what a lot of stuff for one small church!" Jenna exclaimed. "Heh, yeah." Josh said, putting the books down. "It's not just for St Michael's. We share it with St John's and the Methodist church on Oakwood Road." Jenna began putting the books on the shelf. "Um you don't need to do that,” "Jenna." Josh blushed again. "Jenna. It's kind of you to do that but,” "Oh I don't mind. Why should you have to do all the donkey work? This room is a tip. Besides, a good Christian should help others, right? Especially the vicar's right-hand man. That's what a curate is, yes?" Josh relaxed a bit. "Pretty much, yeah. Like Batman and Robin." "Have you always wanted to be a curate?" Josh sat down on a stool. "In truth, no way. I wasn't religious at all when I was a kid. I suffered from crippling shyness. I used to dread being asked to read in front of the class. When I was ten, my dad walked out, and that affected me a lot. Haven't seen him since. Mum turned to drink, I relied on my grandad for support. He became a father figure to me. He used to be a vicar. Thanks to him I survived my teens and passed my exams. I was eighteen when he died. That's when I decided I wanted to follow in his footsteps. Without him - and God, I fear, well I may have gone down a dark path. Got in with a bad crowd. Taken drugs, self-harmed, maybe ended up in jail." "Wow." Jenna replied, realizing how cosseted and safe her upbringing had been. "Well I'm so glad your grandad was there for you." "There are still days when I doubt myself and I'm in a bad place. I feel useless." "Don't put yourself down," Jenna said, walking towards him. "You're an amazing role model, especially for younger people." Josh blinked. "You, think so?" "I do. Plus, you're really cute. Has a girl ever told you that before?" Josh blushed. "Err, no-one except my Nan. I don't think she counts." "Women round here must be blind," Jenna added, making him squirm with embarrassment. She leant forward and planted a kiss on his lips. He trembled, cheeks turning redder. "J-Jenna, don't,” "It's alright Josh. You're not committing a sin or anything. We're not inside the church, if that's you're worried about." "N-no, it's not that. I, um,” The curate sighed. "I, I'm just scared of, I don't know if I can, do this." She already knew he was single and straight, but decided to question him. "Do you have a girlfriend?" "No, but, um, that's the problem really. I'd like one, but I wouldn't know how to tell her,” Jenna stroked his arm. "Tell her what?" "I worry she'd laugh at me." "Josh. Whatever it is, I promise I would never laugh at you. And I will understand." He looked down. "Shit. I'm twenty-five. And I'm still a virgin! I've never gone beyond kissing a girl." She kissed his cheek again. "Oh Josh. That's nothing to feel awkward about. In fact I admire you. In this age when we're bombarded with over-sexualized imagery 24/7 both online and offline, finding someone who's chosen to wait is pretty awesome in my opinion. I lost mine just days after reaching the age of consent. I couldn't wait to lose it. But that's just me,” "Yeah but, I, um,” She pulled him to his feet and gently coaxed the truth out of him. "You want to lose your virginity, yes?" "More than anything. But, dating today is scary. It's a minefield. Especially after Me Too. I'm afraid. I don't want to say the wrong thing and come across as some horny creep,” Jenna held back a chuckle. Mrs. Norris probably thinks of me as a horny creep. She thought. "I get that. But trust me. I don't think a sweet, kind-hearted man of God like you could ever be a creep. Horny yes, nothing wrong with that of course." She winked at him and he gulped. "How about it? I think you're ready right now." His eyes widened. "W-what? Here?" "Why not? It's nice and private, And you're a really sexy curate!" Her face was just inches from his own, hovering there. Then her lips were on his, dancing there softly for a moment before pulling away. "Jenna,” He was already rock hard, and hoped his cassock had disguised this fact. "Shush. You're very special." She whispered, barely audible. "You're warm, caring, You're strong. You deserve to be experience the joys of the flesh." She kissed him again. It's okay to feel nervous. First time is always a bit nerve-racking. But just relax. You'll be just fine,” What an adorable lamb to the slaughter, Jenna thought to herself. He's so scared and unsure. I've never seduced a virgin before, so I'd better not go too hard on him. I do love a challenge. With a bit of encouragement, this sweet guy could have real potential. The touch of her lips sent a fire through his body, a jolt that brought a tingle to every micron of his skin. "Oh, Jenna!" "Shhh." Her lips caressed his own, then his nose, his ear. "Don't talk just now, okay?" "Mmm?" She kissed him again, gently caressing his upper lip between her own. At last, he responded. "Josh." Jenna smiled cheekily. "You're a pretty good kisser, you know that?" "Really?" Just relax. I'm not going anywhere, there's no rush. All we have to do is discover each other. There's no hurry. No-one's going to come in here. I imagine the vicar will be busy for ages." Jenna ran her hand down the front of his black cassock. "Oh my, you're more than ready. "Let's get these buttons unfastened." She knelt before him, opening the cassock and revealing the black trousers underneath. And another straining crotch bulge. "I'm going to worship you," she whispered, unbuckling his belt and unzipping his trousers. Josh was wearing plain black briefs underneath. It was fun seeing the different types of undies men wore. First there was Reverend Morris with his "holy boxers," then Gordon and his sensible white y-fronts, now Josh with smart black tight-fitting briefs. "Everything will be fine. I promise. Close your eyes if it makes you feel better, okay?" The curate hesitated still, but Jenna's smile was reassuring and gentle. "I promise you'll like it." With a shudder, Josh squeezed his eyes tight as his trousers and underwear were lowered, and he could feel the cool air of the room, then Jenna's warm breath on his manhood. "There we are." He couldn't resist a peek, through half-closed eyes. He was painfully stiff, of course, harder than he'd ever been in his life, but he didn't need his eyes to tell him that. He shivered as Jenna ran her hand through his pubes and stooped to kiss him there. He gasped as her smooth palm encircled him. "Oh my God!" "Mmm. So beautiful. Truly God's gift to women. Just relax, don't fight the feeling. Isn't it nice?" Jenna kissed the very tip of his member, and he gasped and moaned, his muscles tensing. "Don't fight it now Josh, just let the feelings come. Relax and let it take you. You don't have to hold it back, just let it come." With that, she closed her lips around his head, tasted him with her tongue. "Uh! Oh Jesus!" The curate groaned. The crescendo was boiling in him now, wonderful and frightening and exhilarating. Nothing could have prepared him for the warm embrace of a woman's mouth, the slight roughness of her tongue as she rolled it up and down his length. No porn, no fantasy could have approached the sensation of her lips gently drawing on his cock, coaxing him towards a peak of indescribable pleasure. The fire was in him and around him, consuming him and his thoughts until all that he was became the connection with her, his flesh and her mouth. Her hands cradled his cock gently as he built towards climax, his breathing becoming rapid and shallow. "Oh,” "Let it come." Josh sighed deeply in relief as Jenna enveloped him again, shuddered as he felt himself swell between her lips, as he released himself to her, surrendered to her, spurting his cum. She lingered over his manhood, slowly coaxing him down from the heights of his ecstasy. She gently licked his shaft and kissed a drop of his essence from the tip, and smiled up at him. "That wasn't so bad, was it?" She said, standing up. "Did you enjoy your first blowjob?" "Jenna. Fucking hell!" "I'll take that as a yes?" "Yes!" he gasped. "Oh good. Because we're not done yet. You don't get off that easily you know!" Jenna began unfastening her skirt, letting it fall to the floor. Josh's eyes widened. She wasn't wearing any panties. An old, battered table was in the middle of the storeroom. Jenna cleared it and reclined on it, spreading her legs and unfastening her blouse. No bra! "Your turn." Josh crossed himself. "Just trust your instincts." She whispered, lowering herself onto her back. Josh stared at her for a second, dumbstruck by her beauty and timid as a deer. Her gently smiling face and the flowing red hair that framed it, the round fullness of her breasts, her long legs, and the tantalizing lure of her wet womanhood between, Finding his courage at last, Josh moved close. With a shaky hand he reached out and tentatively cupped her left breast. Tracing the nipple with his thumb, ever so gently. "Mmm nice, Josh. Keep going!" Encouraged, Josh lowered his mouth to her other breast, the memory of the delightful sensations she'd given him earlier fresh in his mind. He felt her run her fingers through his short blonde hair as he tasted her with his tongue, heard her sigh as he closed his lips around her nipple. "Gently now." "Sorry!" The curate feasted on her breasts for a bit longer, before moving down to her abdomen, planting more kisses, then he paused for a moment. Jenna said nothing, silently urging him to carry on, and he did. Tentatively, he kissed the inside of her thighs, tracing a finger through the trimmed hair above her slit. Josh continued to lovingly kiss her thighs, his nerves beginning to fade. The heady scent of her was overpowering, emboldening him to trail a finger between her cunt lips. The wetness he felt there surprised him, and he glanced up. "You're doing great, Josh." Jenna answered in a throaty whisper. "Please don't stop." He ran a finger over her clit, causing her to let out a moan. Lowering his head, he caressed her softly with his mouth, tasting her. "Oh Josh,” He suckled gently on her clit and she let out a scream. "Jenna?" He pulled away from her, his fear returning. "Did I hurt you?" "No Josh. It was incredible, that's all. When you licked me down there, wow. You sure know how to thrill a woman. You learn quick! But don't make me cum just yet. Because I want you inside me when it happens." Josh's heart leapt into his throat. "Oh,” "Are you ready?" "Um, but protection, I-I don't have a condom,” "It's okay, you don't need to worry. I'm on the Pill." "Oh, right. Good,” "Think of this as doing God's work," Jenna purred, urging him to get on with it. She was eager to feel that virgin cock inside her. Slowly he positioned himself above her on the creaking table. Jenna took his cock in her hand, guiding him. He felt the head of his organ nestle inside her. "Lord in Heaven!" It was such exquisite torture, fighting the urge to cum as fast as he could. The feel of her cunt as it sheathed him was beyond even the joys he'd felt already. At first, he slipped in and out of her slowly. He buried his face in her neck. "Umm, oh God Josh. Yes! Go harder!" Jenna slowly relaxed her control, allowing him to work his cock in and out of her more forcefully. He thrust in deep, as far as he could, and gasped, savoring the sensation. "Oh Josh, that's so good!" He speeded up, as she wrapped her legs round him. Soon he was pounding her like a pro. "Jenna!" He could feel his climax coming now, a mighty force of almost Biblical proportions. Just as Jesus drove out many devils, Josh drove out his virginity, casting it aside forever. He'd been freed. "Ugh!" With a roar of release the curate came, filling Jenna's womanhood with his seed. Josh wasn't sure how long his orgasm lasted. But he knew that it was wonderful, an epiphany of sensation, and that Jenna writhed and gasped in the throes of her own climax in perfect harmony with his. When they'd both calmed down, Jenna held him close and kissed him. "Are you okay? You were amazing, Josh, do you know that? How are you feeling?" "Just fantastic, absolutely fantastic! I, wow. That was, incredible. Um, do you mind if I say a quick prayer for both of us?" "Not at all. You go ahead." When he'd finished, he opened his eyes and looked at Jenna, who was smiling broadly. "You are going to become a bloody amazing vicar!" She said. An Erotic Dream & an organ lesson. T'was the Year of Our Lord 1739, and on a road bound for London, weary preacher and hymn writer Charles Wesley had just arrived at a tavern. "Innkeeper! I hath been riding all day and my poor horse be in the great need of water and rest. As am I." Charles said. "Fear thee not, good fellow, I'll tend to thine horse!" The innkeeper replied. "If it's a room for the night you're looking for, then ye hath come to the right place. Here at the Lamb Inn, there's always a warm greeting for a weary traveler. I'll leave ye in the capable hands of my fine wench Jen, who is adept at making gentlemen feel welcome,” "Greetings to you sir!" Jen said, and Charles was a little taken aback by this stunning redheaded wench. "If you'd like to follow me, I'll lead you to your bedchamber." She picked up a candle and gave him a seductive smirk. "Gladly, Miss!" Charles replied, following her up the creaking wooden staircase. In the main room, sounds of merriment filled the air as many men supped ale and enjoyed the company of willing wenches. "I see you're a man of faith, sir," said Jen as she reached the top of the stairs. "Have you travelled far?" "Aye, all the way from Bristol. I write many hymns. I'm going to visit my older brother John, who's in London. He's a preacher too. In fact he,” "Oh gosh, of course! Your brother must be John Wesley, founder of that Methodist movement I keep hearin' about!" "That's right! I'm Charles Wesley." Jen entered the bedchamber. "Here we are, Mr. Wesley. I trust the room is to your liking? This happens to be a new room - never been used before. Bed never slept in, chair never sat on, chamber pot never,” "Ah, glorious!" Charles interrupted her. "It looks most excellent. I am indeed blessed to have been afforded such kindness. God is good!" "Mmm, thanks be to God," Jen replied, eyeing up Charles. He was young and rather attractive for a man of the cloth. Most of the clergy she'd encountered in her life had been very old men. "There be a fresh jug of water on the table for you, Mr. Wesley. We're lucky here. The Lamb has a deep well which provides safe, clean water to drink. That's why we get so many visitors desperate to quench their thirst without worry of getting the flux." Charles nodded as he put his bag down on the chair and removed his black robe. That four poster bed looked so inviting. "Why don't you sit on the bed, Mr. Wesley? I cannot help but wonder, after all that riding, do you not grow a little stiff?" "Um, I am a little stiff, yes." "Then come over here and sit beside me." Jen said, patting the bed. "I'd be interested to hear about your hymn writing." Charles bashfully did as she asked. "Well right now, I am working on a "Hymn for Christmas Day." But I confess I have only written the first verse. "Perchance could I hear this first verse?" Jen replied. Charles nodded. "Hark how all the Welkin rings Glory to the King of Kings, Peace on Earth, and Mercy mild, God and Sinners reconciled!" "I'd say that's a marvelous first verse," said Jen. "Very stirring, very uplifting. It makes one, rise to the occasion." Her hand had somehow ended up on his thigh. "Oh do you think so? That pleases me greatly, Miss! Now if only I could complete it." Jen removed her mobcap, revealing long, tumbling red locks. Charles gazed, mesmerized. "By all the saints, you're a pretty woman, Miss,” "Jen, Mr. Wesley, perhaps I can be of some help to you." She blew out the candle. "Oh my! Now we're in the dark. How careless of me! We'll just have to,” "Oh Miss Jen!" Charles gasped as her hand groped him in an intimate place. "I think you've risen to the occasion Mr. Wesley!" A few moments later and the good wench had relieved the dear Mr. Wesley of his breeches and cast off the rest of his apparel, including a periwig. The preacher produced naked, stiff, and erect, a wonderful maypole. Jen put her hands to this fine example of maleness and her actions had the desired effect. "Ah! I think my inspiration is returning!" "I'm filled with joy, Mr. Wesley! Tis an honor to help you!" "Joyful all ye Nations rise, Join the Triumph of the Skies, Universal Nature say "Christ the Lord is born to Day!" "That's a wonderful second verse!" Jen ran her tongue round the preacher's erect member, before taking his entire length into her mouth. "Oh Lord in Heaven, I have given in to sin, but if the sin results in a completed hymn, will thou look upon me with mercy?" Charles gasped, as the pleasure overwhelmed him. Jen withdrew. "The Lord will indeed pardon you, Mr. Wesley. Now please relax and enjoy my help!" "Ah, oh my God, thine tongue is divine, it feels so good!" Jen sucked, licked and teased Charles' cock until he could take no more. "Miss Jen! I'm going to spend! Oh, yes!" "Ahh, I have been anointed by your holy essence, Mr. Wesley!" Jen giggled as she eagerly gobbled up his seed. Charles' face bore an expression of utter bliss and satisfaction. "Oh Miss Jen. I am so grateful God delivered me to this inn. What sweet pleasures you have afforded me this evening!" A furious knocking on the bedchamber door disturbed the blissful ambience. "Jen! Jen! You need to get up!" a woman shouted. "Is that, the innkeeper's wife?" Charles wondered, still dazed after his powerful orgasm. Jen licked the remaining cum off the preacher's softening cock. "Mm, sounds like Mother. But wait, Mother died of smallpox ten years ago, so how, ?" Everything seemed to fade away in a strange haze. "Jen! You're going to be late for work! Wake up!" Jenna finally awoke. "Huh? What?" "Are you alright?" Her mum shouted. "Answer me or I'm coming in." "Um yeah. I'm fine Mum!" She rolled over and reached for her smartphone. Squinting, she looked at the clock. "Shit! I overslept!" Breakfast was a rushed affair, with Jenna barely able to drink half a cup of coffee and a piece of toast. "For goodness cake, slow down before you choke on that," her mum said. "Can't believe I overslept. I set my phone. I've never done that before." Jenna said. "Hey, we all do it sometimes. Though your exertions at church no doubt kept you up late. Your dad and I noticed how much time you've been spending at St. Michael's. Now feel free to tell me to mind my own business, but what's with the sudden obsession with church? You've never been interested before. You used to laugh at Gran for being in the Mother's Union." "I guess the pandemic made me think about things differently," Jenna lied, trying to think up a good excuse. "I know I never attended church much before, but I never stopped being a believer." "That's great, Jen. I'm glad it makes you happy. I just hope you're not spending all your time with old people, though. It's good to mix with people your own age." "Oh there's a good mix of different ages at St Michael's. They're not all boomers, Mum. The curate, Yulia and Debbie aren't much different to me. And Reverend Morris, .he's amazing." "I'm sure he is," her mum replied, with a wry grin. "You out tonight?" "Yes. Choir practice." Jenna grabbed her bag and car keys. "By the way, who's Charles Wesley?" "Um, what?" "You were yelling his name over and over in your sleep. You must've been dreaming." "Oh. Well he's a guy who wrote a lot of great hymns. He lived in the 18th century. He wrote that famous carol "Hark the Herald Angels Sing", although the original words were different. Gotta go. Love you. Bye!" Jenna's mum shook her head. "Charles Wesley? When I was growing up, I used to dream about Brad Pitt." "I have got to get a place of my own," Jenna muttered to herself as she headed to the car. "That was cringe." Jenna had prepared herself for her evening "choir practice" with Gordon, by wearing her best lingerie and a sexy dress that perfectly highlighted her curves and cleavage. The organist himself had also made an effort, by wearing his best suit and tie. With his black robe unfastened, he resembled an old-fashioned headmaster. "Hello there!" Gordon said, grinning from ear to ear. Whoa, she looked drop-dead gorgeous. He was practically drooling like a dog in heat. "Not so bad yourself, Gordon!" Jenna replied. "Love the suit. Now all you need is a cane." "A cane?" "To punish me with. You see, I've been a naughty girl. I forgot to practice that piece of music you mentioned." "Oh dearie me," Gordon said, walking over to her. "Whatever am I to do with such a naughty girl? Never mind. I'm sure you can make it up to me some way,” He sat down on the organ stool. "Come sit in my lap, Jenna. We're going to play a little tune together. I'm sure you can do it." "Why Gordon, I'm not sure I can play this. It's a bit of a step up from the piano." "Just give it a try. I'm sure you'll learn quick!" He winked. "Try the third manual," he added, indicating one of the keyboards. Jenna bit her lip and slid onto Gordon's lap. She deliberated wiggled about a bit, causing him to let out a groan. "This seat is a little, hard!" Jenna began playing the first few notes. "You're right, Kings and Queens does sound fantastic on a pipe organ. I'd have never guessed you were an Ava Max fan, Gordon." "Hah, I'm not. Can't stand modern pop music. But the younger members of the choir are always begging for this song. You're great at this!" As Jenna continued to play, Gordon began massaging her breasts and kissing her exposed neck. "Oh Gordon," Jenna sighed. "There's a part-time job available,” he continued, between kisses. "An assistant choirmaster and pianist at the Sunday school. Three days a week. The school isn't just open on Sundays anymore. There's a crèche and breakfast club on Wednesdays. They do after-school sessions for kids who have special needs. It's not bad money. I know you've got all the relevant qualifications. If you're interested, I could easily pull a few strings and get you in." Jenna suddenly halted her playing. "Wow, are you serious?" "Of course I am. Look, the young 'uns think I'm some kind of ogre. And they're probably right. But you, you'd be such an asset to the school. And tell me honestly, do you truly enjoy working in a call center?" "I hate it. The pay is shit and I hate my boss. Now she's a real-life ogre." "Exactly. Your talents are wasted in a dead-end job like that, Jenna. It's up to you of course, but please give it some thought." She turned round to face him. Kissing him hard the lips, she slipped her arms round his shoulders. "I've given it thought. I accept! Now why don't you let me thank you properly, Gordon?" Jenna hiked up her dress, and unfastened Gordon's belt. She unzipped his trousers, pushed down his underpants, and his rock hard erection sprang free from its encumbrance. Unable to contain himself any longer, Gordon pulled aside the crotch of her damp panties, positioned himself to her entrance, and pushed himself into her. The soft lips between her legs parted, and she threw her head back in sudden ecstasy as the organist began thrusting himself in and out of her warm body, slowly at first, then building in speed. Outside, a black 4 by 4 had just pulled up in the church car park. John Norris got out of the driver's side and furiously slammed the door shut. "John please, don't do this!" his wife pleaded. "Not in the church!" "Look Patricia, I want to get to the bottom of this. First Gordon angrily accuses me of spreading lies on Facebook. He called me "the biggest shit-stirrer in this church" to my face! Now the chaps at the Rotary Club have frozen me out. They said I've been making sexist jokes and racist comments about Ukrainians! I ask you, when have I ever made a racist comment? I haven't a racist bone in my body! And I've never signed up to Facebook either. Someone is trying to smear my name. If you ask me, Gordon's the one behind it all! Well, we'll see what he has to say, man-to-man." A look of horror swept Mrs. Norris' face. "You can't go in there! I can hear the organ - the choir are in there!" "I don't care if the whole bloody town is in there!" John yelled, a display of anger that was most unlike him. "This has gone too far. I can't believe Gordon could be so vindictive. He'd a bad-tempered sod, but I never thought he'd do this. Libel is a serious offence." He stormed into the church and marched down the aisle, his panicking wife rushing after him. "Alright alright, it wasn't Gordon. It was me!" She grabbed his arm. He halted. "What?" "I did it." John shook his head. "Why are you trying to protect him? Do you fancy him or something? Is there more to this?" "No! No of course I don't! Look, I signed up to Facebook so I could access the church page but I used your name. I know I shouldn't have but, well surely you must know how members of this church treat me? I'd have been blocked immediately!" John's face had gone through several shades of red and was now the color of raw steak. "You, Did what? You've been spreading lies and racist comments using an account with my name? What the hell am I married to?" He walked round the side of the organ. "Bloody hell!" Mrs. Norris shoved him aside, wondering what had shocked him. "That's her! She's the one who's caused all this! The little tart! She's bringing filth and depravity to this church!" John glared at his wife. "I'd say your own venom has done that already, Patricia." He turned and stormed off. "I'm going home. To pack a few things. I'm going to stay at my brother's for a bit. And you, well you can go to Hell." "Gordon, do you hear somebody shouting?" Jenna sighed as she felt his warm cum fill her. "Probably just a bit of rowdy teen behavior outside," Gordon replied with a smirk. To be continued. By Blacksheep, for Literotica.
If you're gong to build a movement, you're going to need your radicals. Like Batman taking the fall for Harvey Dent, these radicals can be the bad guys, acting as scapegoats by preaching uncomfortable truths and pushing the Overton window to provide cover for pastors, politicians, and leaders who run the risk of reprisal from their institutions. If we are going to win we can't afford to be idealists OR compromisers - we are going to have to be shrewd and calculating. Tune in now as we discuss why every movements needs its radicals, but also its company men. Watch the whole series with Isker now by becoming a member at https://patreon.com/rightresponseministries Get your tickets now for our 2025 Conference. Christ Is King: How To Defeat Trash World at https://rightresponseconference.com *MINISTRY SPONSORS:* *Squirrelly Joes Coffee - Caffeinating The Modern Reformation* Our audience can get a free bag of coffee (just pay shipping) by visiting https://squirrellyjoes.com/rightresponse *The Word Soap* https://thewordsoap.com *Reece Fund.* Christian Capital. Boldly Deployed https://www.reecefund.com/ *Private Family Banking* Set up a FREE Private Family Banking Discovery call using the link below: https://calendly.com/familybankingnow/30min FREE 30-Minute Discovery Call - Private Family Banking - Chuck DeLadurantey - Private Family Banking In this call, I will walk you through the WHY and the HOW of Private Family Banking and show you how to set it up with NO NEW MONEY, just a CHANGE IN YOUR CASH FLOW calendly.com Chuck DeLadurantey Partner at Private Family Banking Text (BANKING) to 321-421-5213 My Digital Business Card Mobile: 830-339-9472 Paxmail.CC: Drive, Docs, Email For A Free People Visit https://paxmail.cc/
Kyle and Nick agree to lose their minds.
With so much clickbait, you'd be forgiven for thinking generative AI was only for making pictures of world leaders as animals and frightening us with imitations of consciousness. But the possibilities of generative AI are endless, especially when combined with existing technology like Wifi. We're on with Origin Wifi CCO Tony Nicolaidis on what exactly is wifi sensing technology, why it's primed to disrupt everything from security to daycares, and how AI is boosting it's processing on an exponential curve.
This podcast hit paid subscribers' inboxes on May 20. It dropped for free subscribers on May 27. To receive future pods as soon as they're live, and to support independent ski journalism, please consider an upgrade to a paid subscription. You can also subscribe to the free tier below:WhoNathan McGree, Owner and General Manager of Tyrol Basin, WisconsinRecorded onApril 29, 2024About Tyrol BasinClick here for a mountain stats overviewOwned by: Nathan McGreeLocated in: Mt. Horeb, WisconsinYear founded: 1958Pass affiliations: Indy Pass and Indy+ Pass – 2 days, no blackoutsClosest neighboring ski areas: Blackhawk Ski Club (:21), Devil's Head (:46), Cascade (1:00), Christmas Mountain Village (1:02)Base elevation: 860 feetSummit elevation: 1,160 feetVertical drop: 300 feetSkiable Acres: 40Average annual snowfall: 41 inchesTrail count: 24 (33% beginner, 25% intermediate, 38% advanced, 4% expert)Lift count: 7 (3 triples, 2 ropetows, 2 carpets – view Lift Blog's inventory of Tyrol Basin's lift fleet)Why I interviewed himWhen you Google “Tyrol,” the expanse of Italian and Austrian Alps from which this Wisconsin bump draws its name, the robots present you with this image:That is not Wisconsin.According to On The Snow, Tyrol Basin recorded two inches of snowfall during the 2021-22 ski season, and 15 inches the following winter. I don't know if these numbers are accurate. No one runs, like, the Southern Wisconsin Snorkel Dawgs Facebook group as a secondary verification source. The site pegs Tyrol's average annual snowfall at 30 inches. That's not even a powder day at Alta. Indy Pass offers a more generous 51. A site called “GottaGoItSnows.com” lists four feet (48 inches), but also offers, as its featured photo of the ski area, this grainy webcam screenshot, which appears to feature two mis-wired AI bots about to zigzag into one another:But it doesn't really matter what Tyrol Basin's average annual snowfall is, or how much snow fell in either of those two winters. The ski area logged a 114-day season during the 2021-22 campaign, and 124 over the winter of 2022-23. That's an outstanding season, above the NSAA-reported industry averages of 110 and 116 days for those respective campaigns. It's a particularly respectable number of ski days when a season pass starts at $199.99, as it did last year (McGree told me he expects that price to drop when 2024-25 passes go on sale in July).No one offers 114 days of skiing on two inches of natural snow by accident. You need what the kids (probably don't) call “mad skillz ya'll.” Especially when you offer a terrain park that looks like this:What's going on here? How can a snow-light bump 28 miles west of Madison where snowsportskiing ought to be impossible offer nearly four months of something approximating winter? That the answer is obvious (snowmaking) doesn't make it any less interesting. After all, put me at the controls of a $106-million Boeing 737, and I'm more likely to crash it into a mountain than to safely return it to the airport – having access to technology and equipment is not the same thing as knowing how to use it (not that I have access to an airplane; God help us). Tyrol Basin is the story of a former diesel mechanic who ended up owning a ski area. And doing a hell of a nice job running it. That's pretty cool, and worth a deeper look.What we talked aboutCoping with a crummy Midwest winter; climate change resilience; a beginner-area expansion; the legend of Dave Usselman; how to create an interesting ski experience; a journey from diesel mechanic to ski area owner; the hardest thing about running a ski area; why ski area owners have to live it; “during winter, it's a hundred-day war”; why owning a ski area is “a lot like farming”; evolving into a year-round business; why mountain biking isn't happening at Tyrol; why season pass prices will decrease for next ski season; how snowtubing roiled a Wisconsin town; how a dairy barn became a ski chalet; expansion potential; the hardest part about building terrain parks; high-speed ropetows; the lost ski area that McGree would like to revive; $2 PBRs; and the Indy PassWhy I thought that now was a good time for this interviewRoughly six years ago, a 33-year-old former diesel-mechanic-turned-haunted-house-purveyor cashed out his retirement account, mortgaged his house, and bought a ski area.“I have no ski-business background whatsoever,” Nathan McGree told the Milwaukee Journal Sentinel at the time. Perhaps an alarming statement, but he followed that with what may be the pithiest five sentences I've ever read on how to successfully run a small ski area:“In order for this place to function well, it needs an on-the-ground owner who is involved in everything,” he said. “I'm the bookkeeper, I'm helping make snow and I can groom the slopes, too. In the past, the general manager would have had to go to the four owners who fought among themselves and were incredibly stingy when it came to running and investing in this place.“Now, if we need a sump pump or something like that, Andy Amacher, my assistant general manager, and I make a decision and go to Menards or wherever and just get it. The old owners are out of the picture entirely now.”McGree immediately cut new glades and added more night-skiing lights. He cranked the snowmaking dial to 11. Since then, he's built a tubing hill, added more runs, refurbished the chairlifts, and added a new carpet. Sometimes there's even a halfpipe – an enormously expensive and complex feature that even the largest ski areas rarely bother with these days.Constant improvement and commitment to a great product. If there are two things that will keep fickle skiers with plenty of other options (the larger Cascade and Devil's Head ski areas are just a touch farther from Madison than Tyrol), it's those two things. That McGree understood that on Day Zero helped. But it didn't guarantee anything. Running a ski area is hard. Because of the weather and because of the equipment and because of the costs and, especially, as McGree discovered, because of (a small but irritating percentage) of the professional complainers who show up to ski/hate-post on StreamBook. But you can make it easier, in the same way you can make anything easier: by thinking ahead, fixing things before they're broken, and embracing creativity over rigidity - and doing all that with a focus that seems unreasonable to observers.Places like Steamboat and Palisades Tahoe and Jackson Hole and Vail Mountain and Killington are run by something approximating armies: marching soldiers numbering sometimes in the thousands, highly organized and with well-defined roles. But there are hundreds of ski areas across America with no such resources. Highly skilled and capable as they may be, the people running these places summersault through the season with no clear expectation of what the next day will bring. Like Batman, they have to drop in with a loaded utility belt, ready to grapple with any quirk or mishap or crime. Ski areas like Teton Pass, Montana; Great Bear, South Dakota; or Granite Gorge, New Hampshire. And Tyrol Basin, where, six years in, McGree has earned his cape.Questions I wish I'd askedTyrol Basin has a pretty cool four-week kids' program: at the end of the sessions, the ski area gives participants a free season pass. I'd liked to have talked about that program a bit and how many of those kids kept showing up after the lessons wrapped.Why you should ski Tyrol BasinTyrol Basin's trailmap undersells the place, presenting you with what looks to be a standard clear-cut Midwestern bump:In reality, the place is amply treed, with well-defined runs etched into the hill (a feature that McGree and I discuss on the podcast):Trees help, always. I am not a huge fan of bowl skiing. Such open spaces make big mountains feel small. That's why I asked Big Sky GM Troy Nedved whether the resort would continue to keep a six-pack running up Powder Seeker (after moving the tram), when it only served two marked runs, and he was like “Bro there's like more skiable acreage in that bowl than there is in Wisconsin” and I was like “oh.” But trees make small mountains feel big, cutting them up like chapters in a book. Even better when the trees between have been gladed, as many of Tyrol's have. With such an arrangement, it can take all day to ski every run. This circa 2015 trailmap, in my opinion, better displays the ski area's depth and variety (even though there are now more runs):It's a fun little ski area, is my point here. More fun than maybe it looks glancing at the stats and trailmap. And if you don't care about trees (or there's no snow in the trees), the park scene is lights-out (and lighted at night). And the ski area is on the Indy Pass, meaning that, if you're reading this newsletter, there's a better-than-average chance that you already own a pair of lift tickets there.I realize that the majority of readers who are not from the Midwest or who don't live in the Midwest have no interest in ever skiing there, and even less interest in what skiing there is. But there's a reason I insist on recording a half-dozen or so pods per year with operators from the region, and it's not simply because I grew up in Michigan (though that's part of it). Skiing the Midwest is a singularly uplifting experience. This is not a place where only rich people ski, or where crowds only materialize on powder days, or where mountains compete in the $10-million chairlift arms race. Skiing at Tyrol Basin or Caberfae Peaks or Giants Ridge is pure, illicit-drugs-grade fun. Here, skiing is for everyone. It's done regardless of conditions or forecast, and with little mind to the 60-year-old chairlifts with no safety bars (though Tyrol's three triples are modern, and all have bars; the majority of lifts throughout the Midwest are of an older vintage). Skiing is just Something To Do In The Winter, when there is so little else other than tending to your Pet Rectangle or shopping or day-drinking or complaining about the cold. It's a joyous scene, and I wish everyone could see it at least once.Podcast NotesOn Afton Alps and Welch VillageMcGree skied Afton Alps and Welch Village as a kid. Both offer large, sprawling footprints on tiny vertical drops (350 and 360 feet, respectively), that are incredibly fun to ski.On CascadeI mention Cascade, which is Tyrol's larger competitor and roughly equidistant (in another direction), from Madison. The mountain hits 450 vertical feet in comparison to Tyrol's 300, and 176 acres to Tyrol's 40. As with all ski area stats that I cite, these stats are either lifted from the ski area's website (Cascade), or taken from a reliable secondary source (in this case, the Indy Pass website for Tyrol). I hosted Cascade GM Matt Vohs on the podcast last year. Like Tyrol, it's a pretty cool operation:On tubing dramaJust as a reminder that NIMBY-ism isn't confined to the Mountain West, we discuss the zealous opposition to Tyrol's tubing operation. Per Channel 3000 in 2018:Some community members don't agree with a plan to install lighting on the tubing hill and are pushing against official approval of a conditional use permit.A Dane County panel postponed its decision after listening to at least five residents speak out against the lighting. Marc Brody, of the Town of Vermont, was one of them. He told the panel that McGree was unclear about what the plans are and said the proposed lighting would cause significant light pollution.Tyrol eventually built the tubing hill, which, if it didn't save the business, at least reinforced it. When I last checked, the town was still standing.On “Matt Zebransky's video about high-speeds versus fixed-grips”McGree mentions Matt Zebransky, who runs midwestskiers.com. Specifically, he references this enlightening video, which illustrates the counterintuitive but irrefutable fact that fixed-grip quads move exactly the same number of skiers per hour as detachable quads (typically 2,400 at full capacity):And here's Zebransky's 2019 interview with McGree:On that chaletThis circa-late 1800s converted dairy barn is one of the cooler chalets (Midwest code for “baselodge”), anywhere in America:On Skyline Basin, Wisconsin McGree's ambition is to purchase and rehabilitate the lost Skyline Basin ski area, which sits around 90 minutes north of Tyrol. A 1974 Ski magazine article listed a 335-foot vertical drop, with a double and a triple chair (McGree intimates that only the triple is standing, and is likely unusable). Here's a circa 1999 trailmap, which is delightful:Don't confuse this with the lost Skyline ski area in Michigan. That's in Grayling, only an hour north of where I grew up. It has great intermediate pitch and an improvisational, eclectic trail and lift network, but no snowmaking. This just doesn't work in Michigan anymore (unless you're Mount Bohemia). The green line is a chairlift, and all the red lines are ropetows:Skimap.org says this trailmap dates to 2011, but the place really only ran intermittently since the 1990s, when I last skied there. I took these photos of the ragged-but-intact operation in July 2022. Last I checked (with the current owner), the place is still for sale. It sits directly off an expressway and would be a fun project for someone with $20 million to blow:The Storm explores the world of lift-served skiing year-round. Join us.The Storm publishes year-round, and guarantees 100 articles per year. This is article 36/100 in 2024, and number 536 since launching on Oct. 13, 2019. Get full access to The Storm Skiing Journal and Podcast at www.stormskiing.com/subscribe
Like Batman & Robin, Lennon & McCartney, or Ben & Jerry, we all love a good partnership. Just before the festivities got under way, Chris got together with some old friends to announce a very special partnership & the announcement of their new seamlees, integration. S4labour and Peoplebank work with some of hospitality's top names. By sharing the people data collected from the ATS to the Workforce Management via a seamless API integration, S4labour and Peoplebank's integration saves you time from duplicating work. Once a member of staff has been hired and added to the system, they will appear on the S4labour system ready to be scheduled. Now with the enhancement built, you can share your employee's contracts automatically via the API, which means no more manual uploads and reduces compliance risk. Please reach out to either Richard Or David if you need to know more, Enjoy!
Merry Bats-Mas to one and all! We're getting near Christmas, and so it's time to go back to the holiday stories in Gotham well (and if you think we might run out any time soon, have no fears, we've got stories for years). This year, we're reading the first Batman Christmas story, which features some weird not-really tie ins to A Christmas Carol, an animated universe Batman story by Paul Dini, so you know Will has feelings, and a truly mixed bag Batman annual from the dawn of the Rebirth era. Christmas (Batman V.1 # 9) A Christmas Riddle (Batman & Robin Adventures # 3) Batman V.3 Annual # 1 Check out our current ranking list at www.comicsxf.com/batchat-rankings/ Thanks to Geri Nonnewitz for our podcast logo Follow the show on Twitter @BatChatComics and support the show on Patreon at www.patreon.com/batchatwithmattandwill
The Zombie weed! Oh, watch out for that Zombie weed... Toppie and his pal Tommy Hashbrowns visit a marijuana dispensary somewhere in the north country, and later, Toppie experiences what he has come to call... his "Lost Weekend"! The true tale of a naked stoner for your edification and entertainment! Write to Toppie at Smellcast@aol.com. Leave a comment on Toppie's blog! Follow him on X. Friend Toppie on Facebook by emailing him YOUR FB name and link, then Toppie will find YOU and friend you!
Did any of you ever want to be a superhero when you were a kid and protect your city, neighborhood or community? Like Batman, our guest this week, epidemiologist Dr. Flojaune Cofer, PhD, MPH, is committed to stopping forces that hurt our neighbors through community trust and partnerships. Together we can compassionately solve the homeless crisis. Join Theosophist Benjamin W. Decker Dr. Flojaune Cofer in a poignant conversation about how sometimes spiritual awakening means standing up to injustice and inequality and letting our hearts be roused into action. Dr. Flo encourages listeners to not be deceived into believing the lie that it is hard to fix homelessness and other injustices. The solution to homelessness is simple, it's providing homes and helping people stay healthy. Learn more about our guest here:Flojaune Cofer, PhD, MPH is an epidemiologist and serves as the Senior Director of Policy for Public Health Advocates. She manages a team of staff leading health equity initiatives focused on California state policy and public health emergency preparedness.Prior to joining Public Health Advocates, she led the preconception health initiative for the California Department of Public Health, working to ensure vital maternal health and reproductive services were available statewide. For her professional contributions and community participation, she was awarded the Young Professional of the Year Award by the Sacramento Urban League, the Exceptional Woman of Color Award by the Sacramento Cultural Hub, the 40 Under 40 Award by the Sacramento Business Journa͕l, Fem Dems of Sacramento: Sheroes Responding to COVID and the Sacramento Black Wellness Award from the Gender Health Center.https://phadvocates.org/person/flojaune-cofer/Learn how you can help end homelessness today: https://thisclose2unhoused.org/ Follow Dr. Flojaune Cofer on Instagram:https://www.instagram.com/flo4sacramento/Follow Public Health Advocates on Instagram:https://instagram.com/wearephadvocatesBook a trip to Rythmia Life Advancement Center in Costa Rica in October 2023, a special retreat hosted by Benjamin W. Decker.Experience Ayahuasca Plant Medicine at the First Ever Medically-Licensed Resort to offer this sacred shamanic experience. Enjoy a week of deep transformation with plant medicine ceremonies led by shamans trained in the Columbian tradition and plant medicine preparation and integration workshops.https://bendeckermeditation.com/retreatsDeepen Your Meditation Practice with Books by Ben Decker:https://www.amazon.com/Benjamin-W-Decker/e/B07C9WKP8JWork with Ben Decker:http://bendeckermeditation.com/privatesFollow Modern Spirituality Show on Instagram:Watch the episode on YouTube:Contact The Modern Spirituality Show:Host/Executive Producer: Ben DeckerInstagram.com/BenjaminwdeckerProducer:Ansley WellerAnsley@ModernSpiritualityPodcast.com
There are any number of reasons I like Batman, but a major component is his accessibility, and by this I mean, the idea that I, too, could be like Batman. Many in the comic book fandom have argued that Batman is the most powerful superhero in the DC universe, this despite the fact that he has no “superpowers” per se. He's just a schmuck like the rest of us. Chuck Dixon, long-time Batman writer, says that Batman is “at heart a wish-fulfillment character.” And for me, well yeah. I mean, I'm not interested in dressing up as a bat and fighting crime in the pale moonlight, but I suspect that the characteristics and attributes that make Batman such a formidable doer of deeds can likewise serve us in life, business, or whatever challenge is set before us.
The Curate loses his virginity.By Blacksheep. Listen to the Podcast at Steamy Stories.At this Sunday’s service, there was much talk of the upcoming harvest festival. Members of the congregation were encouraged to donate fruit and vegetables, along with non-perishable items for the local foodbank.Jenna had made an effort and brought along a bag of apples. She placed the bag on the side table in the church hall.“I don’t know how a brazen hussy like you has the cheek to set foot in a church.”Jenna remained calm, as she turned to face Mrs. Norris. “Well I’m a Christian, the same as you.”“Huh! Christian my foot. I saw what you and the organist were getting up to and I think it’s disgusting! In the church of all places! And he’s old enough to be your father!”“Well if you clutch those pearls of yours any tighter they’ll crumble to dust. And Gordon and I happen to be consenting adults. Single consenting adults. So there.”“Why you, you, .horrid little slag!” Mrs. Norris fumed, lip quivering. She stormed off.Jenna exhaled and rolled her eyes.“Coffee or tea?” a friendlier voice asked. It was Debbie, the Sunday school teacher, who was volunteering to do today’s hot drinks rota in the hall.“Tea please,” Jenna replied.“You ok?”“Yeah. I don’t think I’ll be on her Christmas card list.”“Don’t let that old bag get to you. She’s a nasty one. She’s horribly ageist. Not to mention xenophobic too. I overheard her mocking Yulia’s English skills last week. I can’t stand her. Her husband’s not that bad, he’s a tedious fusspot, but there’s no malice in him. But her, she’s poison.”“I heard her hubby spreads gossip on Facebook.” Jenna said.“More likely that’s her doing.” Debbie replied. “I’d be surprised if John Norris even knows how to switch on a laptop.”A brief chill ran through Jenna. What if Mrs. Norris were to post some bile about her online? “I don’t use social media anymore,” she said. “Briefly poked my nose into Twitter as a teen, but didn’t like the pile-ons.”“Wise. I’m on Facebook, but only to keep up with church stuff. I never post anything about my private life. I imagine Mrs. Norris would have a stroke if she knew I was dating a woman. A married woman at that. Keep it to yourself. I’m not ready to come out yet.”“Don’t worry, I won’t say a word.”Jenna sipped her tea quietly as she observed the other members of the congregation file into the hall. She was hoping Reverend Morris would soon arrive, but after fifteen minutes, there was still no sign of him. Then there was Gordon; he never came into the hall after a service, and he’d sent her that amusing text message on Friday, about Charles Wesley and his “bulging hymn book.”She headed out of the hall, in search of Gordon, when Josh the curate came staggering in, carrying a massive pile of hymn books. He almost collided with Jenna and dropped a couple of books.“Oh! I’m so sorry!” Josh stammered. “How clumsy of me.”Jenna bent down and picked up the books. “You’re loaded up like a pack horse. Let me give you a hand. Where are you taking all these?”“Um. So kind!” His pale cheeks went pink. “The storeroom at the far end of the hall. These are spare hymn books.”“Ok. Lead the way. By the way, you haven’t seen the vicar have you?”“"Oh, he and the organist are in a meeting. One of the organ pipes has just been repaired.”“Damn,” Jenna muttered under her breath. “Oh dear. How sad. I guess he’ll miss his tea and biscuits.”She followed Josh down to the storeroom. She’d never paid much attention to the curate before, but looking at him now, she realized that he was rather cute. Mid-twenties, tall and stocky with fair hair and a chubby face. There was an endearing innocence about him. Reverend Morris had said he was hoping to complete his ordination next year and become a fully-fledged vicar. He’d been impressed by his devotion to the church - but he needed to come out of his shell a bit and interact more with worshippers. Josh was a shy man and lacking in self-confidence. Remembering this information made Jenna smile.I think this innocent curate needs some other kind of help,The storeroom was vast, and crammed from floor to ceiling with box files, books, old furniture and plastic crates.“Holy sh,, I didn’t know this room existed. And what a lot of stuff for one small church!” Jenna exclaimed.“Heh, yeah.” Josh said, putting the books down. “It’s not just for St Michael’s. We share it with St John’s and the Methodist church on Oakwood Road.”Jenna began putting the books on the shelf.“Um you don’t need to do that,”"Jenna.”Josh blushed again. “Jenna. It’s kind of you to do that but,”"Oh I don’t mind. Why should you have to do all the donkey work? This room is a tip. Besides, a good Christian should help others, right? Especially the vicar’s right-hand man. That’s what a curate is, yes?”Josh relaxed a bit. “Pretty much, yeah. Like Batman and Robin.”“Have you always wanted to be a curate?”Josh sat down on a stool. “In truth, no way. I wasn’t religious at all when I was a kid. I suffered from crippling shyness. I used to dread being asked to read in front of the class. When I was ten, my dad walked out, and that affected me a lot. Haven’t seen him since. Mum turned to drink, I relied on my grandad for support. He became a father figure to me. He used to be a vicar. Thanks to him I survived my teens and passed my exams. I was eighteen when he died. That’s when I decided I wanted to follow in his footsteps. Without him - and God, I fear, well I may have gone down a dark path. Got in with a bad crowd. Taken drugs, self-harmed, maybe ended up in jail.”“Wow.” Jenna replied, realizing how cosseted and safe her upbringing had been. “Well I’m so glad your grandad was there for you.”“There are still days when I doubt myself and I’m in a bad place. I feel useless.”“Don’t put yourself down,” Jenna said, walking towards him. “You’re an amazing role model, especially for younger people.”Josh blinked. “You, think so?”“I do. Plus, you’re really cute. Has a girl ever told you that before?”Josh blushed. “Err, no-one except my Nan. I don’t think she counts.”“Women round here must be blind,” Jenna added, making him squirm with embarrassment. She leant forward and planted a kiss on his lips. He trembled, cheeks turning redder.“J-Jenna, don’t,”"It’s alright Josh. You’re not committing a sin or anything. We’re not inside the church, if that’s you’re worried about.”“N-no, it’s not that. I, um,” The curate sighed. "I, I’m just scared of, I don’t know if I can, do this.”She already knew he was single and straight, but decided to question him. “Do you have a girlfriend?”“No, but, um, that’s the problem really. I’d like one, but I wouldn’t know how to tell her,”Jenna stroked his arm. "Tell her what?”“I worry she’d laugh at me.”“Josh. Whatever it is, I promise I would never laugh at you. And I will understand.”He looked down. “Shit. I’m twenty-five. And I’m still a virgin! I’ve never gone beyond kissing a girl.”She kissed his cheek again. “Oh Josh. That’s nothing to feel awkward about. In fact I admire you. In this age when we’re bombarded with over-sexualized imagery 24/7 both online and offline, finding someone who’s chosen to wait is pretty awesome in my opinion. I lost mine just days after reaching the age of consent. I couldn’t wait to lose it. But that’s just me,”"Yeah but, I, um,”She pulled him to his feet and gently coaxed the truth out of him. "You want to lose your virginity, yes?”“More than anything. But, dating today is scary. It’s a minefield. Especially after Me Too. I’m afraid. I don’t want to say the wrong thing and come across as some horny creep,”Jenna held back a chuckle. Mrs. Norris probably thinks of me as a horny creep. She thought."I get that. But trust me. I don’t think a sweet, kind-hearted man of God like you could ever be a creep. Horny yes, nothing wrong with that of course.” She winked at him and he gulped. “How about it? I think you’re ready right now.”His eyes widened. “W-what? Here?”“Why not? It’s nice and private, And you’re a really sexy curate!” Her face was just inches from his own, hovering there. Then her lips were on his, dancing there softly for a moment before pulling away.“Jenna,” He was already rock hard, and hoped his cassock had disguised this fact."Shush. You’re very special.” She whispered, barely audible. “You’re warm, caring, You’re strong. You deserve to be experience the joys of the flesh.” She kissed him again. It’s okay to feel nervous. First time is always a bit nerve-racking. But just relax. You’ll be just fine,”What an adorable lamb to the slaughter, Jenna thought to herself. He’s so scared and unsure. I’ve never seduced a virgin before, so I’d better not go too hard on him. I do love a challenge. With a bit of encouragement, this sweet guy could have real potential.The touch of her lips sent a fire through his body, a jolt that brought a tingle to every micron of his skin. “Oh, Jenna!”“Shhh.” Her lips caressed his own, then his nose, his ear. “Don’t talk just now, okay?”“Mmm?”She kissed him again, gently caressing his upper lip between her own. At last, he responded.“Josh.” Jenna smiled cheekily. “You’re a pretty good kisser, you know that?”“Really?”Just relax. I’m not going anywhere, there’s no rush. All we have to do is discover each other. There’s no hurry. No-one’s going to come in here. I imagine the vicar will be busy for ages.“Jenna ran her hand down the front of his black cassock. "Oh my, you’re more than ready. "Let’s get these buttons unfastened.” She knelt before him, opening the cassock and revealing the black trousers underneath. And another straining crotch bulge.“I’m going to worship you,” she whispered, unbuckling his belt and unzipping his trousers. Josh was wearing plain black briefs underneath. It was fun seeing the different types of undies men wore. First there was Reverend Morris with his “holy boxers,” then Gordon and his sensible white y-fronts, now Josh with smart black tight-fitting briefs.“Everything will be fine. I promise. Close your eyes if it makes you feel better, okay?”The curate hesitated still, but Jenna’s smile was reassuring and gentle. “I promise you’ll like it.” With a shudder, Josh squeezed his eyes tight as his trousers and underwear were lowered, and he could feel the cool air of the room, then Jenna’s warm breath on his manhood.“There we are.”He couldn’t resist a peek, through half-closed eyes. He was painfully stiff, of course, harder than he’d ever been in his life, but he didn’t need his eyes to tell him that. He shivered as Jenna ran her hand through his pubes and stooped to kiss him there. He gasped as her smooth palm encircled him.“Oh my God!”“Mmm. So beautiful. Truly God’s gift to women. Just relax, don’t fight the feeling. Isn’t it nice?” Jenna kissed the very tip of his member, and he gasped and moaned, his muscles tensing. “Don’t fight it now Josh, just let the feelings come. Relax and let it take you. You don’t have to hold it back, just let it come.” With that, she closed her lips around his head, tasted him with her tongue.“Uh! Oh Jesus!” The curate groaned. The crescendo was boiling in him now, wonderful and frightening and exhilarating. Nothing could have prepared him for the warm embrace of a woman’s mouth, the slight roughness of her tongue as she rolled it up and down his length. No porn, no fantasy could have approached the sensation of her lips gently drawing on his cock, coaxing him towards a peak of indescribable pleasure. The fire was in him and around him, consuming him and his thoughts until all that he was became the connection with her, his flesh and her mouth. Her hands cradled his cock gently as he built towards climax, his breathing becoming rapid and shallow.“Oh,”"Let it come.”Josh sighed deeply in relief as Jenna enveloped him again, shuddered as he felt himself swell between her lips, as he released himself to her, surrendered to her, spurting his cum. She lingered over his manhood, slowly coaxing him down from the heights of his ecstasy. She gently licked his shaft and kissed a drop of his essence from the tip, and smiled up at him.“That wasn’t so bad, was it?” She said, standing up. “Did you enjoy your first blowjob?”“Jenna. Fucking hell!”“I’ll take that as a yes?”“Yes!” he gasped.“Oh good. Because we’re not done yet. You don’t get off that easily you know!” Jenna began unfastening her skirt, letting it fall to the floor. Josh’s eyes widened. She wasn’t wearing any panties.An old, battered table was in the middle of the storeroom. Jenna cleared it and reclined on it, spreading her legs and unfastening her blouse. No bra!“Your turn.”Josh crossed himself.“Just trust your instincts.” She whispered, lowering herself onto her back. Josh stared at her for a second, dumbstruck by her beauty and timid as a deer. Her gently smiling face and the flowing red hair that framed it, the round fullness of her breasts, her long legs, and the tantalizing lure of her wet womanhood between,Finding his courage at last, Josh moved close. With a shaky hand he reached out and tentatively cupped her left breast. Tracing the nipple with his thumb, ever so gently.“Mmm nice, Josh. Keep going!”Encouraged, Josh lowered his mouth to her other breast, the memory of the delightful sensations she’d given him earlier fresh in his mind. He felt her run her fingers through his short blonde hair as he tasted her with his tongue, heard her sigh as he closed his lips around her nipple.“Gently now.”“Sorry!”The curate feasted on her breasts for a bit longer, before moving down to her abdomen, planting more kisses, then he paused for a moment. Jenna said nothing, silently urging him to carry on, and he did. Tentatively, he kissed the inside of her thighs, tracing a finger through the trimmed hair above her slit.Josh continued to lovingly kiss her thighs, his nerves beginning to fade. The heady scent of her was overpowering, emboldening him to trail a finger between her cunt lips. The wetness he felt there surprised him, and he glanced up.“You’re doing great, Josh.” Jenna answered in a throaty whisper. “Please don’t stop.”He ran a finger over her clit, causing her to let out a moan. Lowering his head, he caressed her softly with his mouth, tasting her.“Oh Josh,” He suckled gently on her clit and she let out a scream."Jenna?” He pulled away from her, his fear returning. “Did I hurt you?”“No Josh. It was incredible, that’s all. When you licked me down there, wow. You sure know how to thrill a woman. You learn quick! But don’t make me cum just yet. Because I want you inside me when it happens.”Josh’s heart leapt into his throat. “Oh,”"Are you ready?”“Um, but protection, I-I don’t have a condom,”"It’s okay, you don’t need to worry. I’m on the Pill.”“Oh, right. Good,”"Think of this as doing God’s work,” Jenna purred, urging him to get on with it. She was eager to feel that virgin cock inside her.Slowly he positioned himself above her on the creaking table. Jenna took his cock in her hand, guiding him. He felt the head of his organ nestle inside her.“Lord in Heaven!” It was such exquisite torture, fighting the urge to cum as fast as he could. The feel of her cunt as it sheathed him was beyond even the joys he’d felt already.At first, he slipped in and out of her slowly. He buried his face in her neck.“Umm, oh God Josh. Yes! Go harder!”Jenna slowly relaxed her control, allowing him to work his cock in and out of her more forcefully. He thrust in deep, as far as he could, and gasped, savoring the sensation.“Oh Josh, that’s so good!”He speeded up, as she wrapped her legs round him. Soon he was pounding her like a pro.“Jenna!” He could feel his climax coming now, a mighty force of almost Biblical proportions. Just as Jesus drove out many devils, Josh drove out his virginity, casting it aside forever. He’d been freed.“Ugh!” With a roar of release the curate came, filling Jenna’s womanhood with his seed. Josh wasn’t sure how long his orgasm lasted. But he knew that it was wonderful, an epiphany of sensation, and that Jenna writhed and gasped in the throes of her own climax in perfect harmony with his.When they’d both calmed down, Jenna held him close and kissed him. “Are you okay? You were amazing, Josh, do you know that? How are you feeling?”“Just fantastic, absolutely fantastic! I, wow. That was, incredible. Um, do you mind if I say a quick prayer for both of us?”“Not at all. You go ahead.”When he’d finished, he opened his eyes and looked at Jenna, who was smiling broadly. “You are going to become a bloody amazing vicar!” She said.An Erotic Dream & an organ lesson.T'was the Year of Our Lord 1739, and on a road bound for London, weary preacher and hymn writer Charles Wesley had just arrived at a tavern.“Innkeeper! I hath been riding all day and my poor horse be in the great need of water and rest. As am I.” Charles said.“Fear thee not, good fellow, I’ll tend to thine horse!” The innkeeper replied. “If it’s a room for the night you’re looking for, then ye hath come to the right place. Here at the Lamb Inn, there’s always a warm greeting for a weary traveler. I’ll leave ye in the capable hands of my fine wench Jen, who is adept at making gentlemen feel welcome,”"Greetings to you sir!” Jen said, and Charles was a little taken aback by this stunning redheaded wench. “If you’d like to follow me, I’ll lead you to your bedchamber.” She picked up a candle and gave him a seductive smirk.“Gladly, Miss!” Charles replied, following her up the creaking wooden staircase. In the main room, sounds of merriment filled the air as many men supped ale and enjoyed the company of willing wenches.“I see you’re a man of faith, sir,” said Jen as she reached the top of the stairs. “Have you travelled far?”“Aye, all the way from Bristol. I write many hymns. I’m going to visit my older brother John, who’s in London. He’s a preacher too. In fact he,”"Oh gosh, of course! Your brother must be John Wesley, founder of that Methodist movement I keep hearin’ about!”“That’s right! I’m Charles Wesley.”Jen entered the bedchamber. “Here we are, Mr. Wesley. I trust the room is to your liking? This happens to be a new room - never been used before. Bed never slept in, chair never sat on, chamber pot never,”"Ah, glorious!” Charles interrupted her. “It looks most excellent. I am indeed blessed to have been afforded such kindness. God is good!”“Mmm, thanks be to God,” Jen replied, eyeing up Charles. He was young and rather attractive for a man of the cloth. Most of the clergy she’d encountered in her life had been very old men.“There be a fresh jug of water on the table for you, Mr. Wesley. We’re lucky here. The Lamb has a deep well which provides safe, clean water to drink. That’s why we get so many visitors desperate to quench their thirst without worry of getting the flux.”Charles nodded as he put his bag down on the chair and removed his black robe. That four poster bed looked so inviting.“Why don’t you sit on the bed, Mr. Wesley? I cannot help but wonder, after all that riding, do you not grow a little stiff?”“Um, I am a little stiff, yes.”“Then come over here and sit beside me.” Jen said, patting the bed. “I’d be interested to hear about your hymn writing.”Charles bashfully did as she asked. “Well right now, I am working on a "Hymn for Christmas Day.” But I confess I have only written the first verse.“Perchance could I hear this first verse?” Jen replied.Charles nodded.“Hark how all the Welkin ringsGlory to the King of Kings,Peace on Earth, and Mercy mild,God and Sinners reconciled!”“I’d say that’s a marvelous first verse,” said Jen. “Very stirring, very uplifting. It makes one, rise to the occasion.” Her hand had somehow ended up on his thigh.“Oh do you think so? That pleases me greatly, Miss! Now if only I could complete it.”Jen removed her mobcap, revealing long, tumbling red locks. Charles gazed, mesmerized. “By all the saints, you’re a pretty woman, Miss,”"Jen, Mr. Wesley, perhaps I can be of some help to you.” She blew out the candle. “Oh my! Now we’re in the dark. How careless of me! We’ll just have to,”"Oh Miss Jen!” Charles gasped as her hand groped him in an intimate place.“I think you’ve risen to the occasion Mr. Wesley!”A few moments later and the good wench had relieved the dear Mr. Wesley of his breeches and cast off the rest of his apparel, including a periwig. The preacher produced naked, stiff, and erect, a wonderful maypole. Jen put her hands to this fine example of maleness and her actions had the desired effect.“Ah! I think my inspiration is returning!”“I’m filled with joy, Mr. Wesley! Tis an honor to help you!”“Joyful all ye Nations rise,Join the Triumph of the Skies,Universal Nature say"Christ the Lord is born to Day!”“That’s a wonderful second verse!” Jen ran her tongue round the preacher’s erect member, before taking his entire length into her mouth.“Oh Lord in Heaven, I have given in to sin, but if the sin results in a completed hymn, will thou look upon me with mercy?” Charles gasped, as the pleasure overwhelmed him.Jen withdrew. “The Lord will indeed pardon you, Mr. Wesley. Now please relax and enjoy my help!”“Ah, oh my God, thine tongue is divine, it feels so good!”Jen sucked, licked and teased Charles’ cock until he could take no more.“Miss Jen! I’m going to spend! Oh, yes!”“Ahh, I have been anointed by your holy essence, Mr. Wesley!” Jen giggled as she eagerly gobbled up his seed.Charles’ face bore an expression of utter bliss and satisfaction. “Oh Miss Jen. I am so grateful God delivered me to this inn. What sweet pleasures you have afforded me this evening!”A furious knocking on the bedchamber door disturbed the blissful ambience.“Jen! Jen! You need to get up!” a woman shouted.“Is that, the innkeeper’s wife?” Charles wondered, still dazed after his powerful orgasm.Jen licked the remaining cum off the preacher’s softening cock. “Mm, sounds like Mother. But wait, Mother died of smallpox ten years ago, so how, ?”Everything seemed to fade away in a strange haze.“Jen! You’re going to be late for work! Wake up!”Jenna finally awoke. “Huh? What?”“Are you alright?” Her mum shouted. “Answer me or I’m coming in.”“Um yeah. I’m fine Mum!” She rolled over and reached for her smartphone. Squinting, she looked at the clock.“Shit! I overslept!”Breakfast was a rushed affair, with Jenna barely able to drink half a cup of coffee and a piece of toast.“For goodness cake, slow down before you choke on that,” her mum said.“Can’t believe I overslept. I set my phone. I’ve never done that before.” Jenna said.“Hey, we all do it sometimes. Though your exertions at church no doubt kept you up late. Your dad and I noticed how much time you’ve been spending at St. Michael’s. Now feel free to tell me to mind my own business, but what’s with the sudden obsession with church? You’ve never been interested before. You used to laugh at Gran for being in the Mother’s Union.”“I guess the pandemic made me think about things differently,” Jenna lied, trying to think up a good excuse. “I know I never attended church much before, but I never stopped being a believer.”“That’s great, Jen. I’m glad it makes you happy. I just hope you’re not spending all your time with old people, though. It’s good to mix with people your own age.”“Oh there’s a good mix of different ages at St Michael’s. They’re not all boomers, Mum. The curate, Yulia and Debbie aren’t much different to me. And Reverend Morris, .he’s amazing.”“I’m sure he is,” her mum replied, with a wry grin. “You out tonight?”“Yes. Choir practice.” Jenna grabbed her bag and car keys.“By the way, who’s Charles Wesley?”“Um, what?”“You were yelling his name over and over in your sleep. You must’ve been dreaming.”“Oh. Well he’s a guy who wrote a lot of great hymns. He lived in the 18th century. He wrote that famous carol "Hark the Herald Angels Sing”, although the original words were different. Gotta go. Love you. Bye!“Jenna’s mum shook her head. "Charles Wesley? When I was growing up, I used to dream about Brad Pitt.”“I have got to get a place of my own,” Jenna muttered to herself as she headed to the car. “That was cringe.”Jenna had prepared herself for her evening “choir practice” with Gordon, by wearing her best lingerie and a sexy dress that perfectly highlighted her curves and cleavage. The organist himself had also made an effort, by wearing his best suit and tie. With his black robe unfastened, he resembled an old-fashioned headmaster.“Hello there!” Gordon said, grinning from ear to ear. Whoa, she looked drop-dead gorgeous. He was practically drooling like a dog in heat.“Not so bad yourself, Gordon!” Jenna replied. “Love the suit. Now all you need is a cane.”“A cane?”“To punish me with. You see, I’ve been a naughty girl. I forgot to practice that piece of music you mentioned.”“Oh dearie me,” Gordon said, walking over to her. “Whatever am I to do with such a naughty girl? Never mind. I’m sure you can make it up to me some way,”He sat down on the organ stool. "Come sit in my lap, Jenna. We’re going to play a little tune together. I’m sure you can do it.”“Why Gordon, I’m not sure I can play this. It’s a bit of a step up from the piano.”“Just give it a try. I’m sure you’ll learn quick!” He winked. “Try the third manual,” he added, indicating one of the keyboards.Jenna bit her lip and slid onto Gordon’s lap. She deliberated wiggled about a bit, causing him to let out a groan. “This seat is a little, hard!”Jenna began playing the first few notes. “You’re right, Kings and Queens does sound fantastic on a pipe organ. I’d have never guessed you were an Ava Max fan, Gordon.”“Hah, I’m not. Can’t stand modern pop music. But the younger members of the choir are always begging for this song. You’re great at this!”As Jenna continued to play, Gordon began massaging her breasts and kissing her exposed neck.“Oh Gordon,” Jenna sighed.“There’s a part-time job available,” he continued, between kisses. "An assistant choirmaster and pianist at the Sunday school. Three days a week. The school isn’t just open on Sundays anymore. There’s a crèche and breakfast club on Wednesdays. They do after-school sessions for kids who have special needs. It’s not bad money. I know you’ve got all the relevant qualifications. If you’re interested, I could easily pull a few strings and get you in.”Jenna suddenly halted her playing. “Wow, are you serious?”“Of course I am. Look, the young ‘uns think I’m some kind of ogre. And they’re probably right. But you, you’d be such an asset to the school. And tell me honestly, do you truly enjoy working in a call center?”“I hate it. The pay is shit and I hate my boss. Now she’s a real-life ogre.”“Exactly. Your talents are wasted in a dead-end job like that, Jenna. It’s up to you of course, but please give it some thought.”She turned round to face him. Kissing him hard the lips, she slipped her arms round his shoulders. “I’ve given it thought. I accept! Now why don’t you let me thank you properly, Gordon?”Jenna hiked up her dress, and unfastened Gordon’s belt. She unzipped his trousers, pushed down his underpants, and his rock hard erection sprang free from its encumbrance. Unable to contain himself any longer, Gordon pulled aside the crotch of her damp panties, positioned himself to her entrance, and pushed himself into her. The soft lips between her legs parted, and she threw her head back in sudden ecstasy as the organist began thrusting himself in and out of her warm body, slowly at first, then building in speed.Outside, a black 4 by 4 had just pulled up in the church car park. John Norris got out of the driver’s side and furiously slammed the door shut.“John please, don’t do this!” his wife pleaded. “Not in the church!”“Look Patricia, I want to get to the bottom of this. First Gordon angrily accuses me of spreading lies on Facebook. He called me "the biggest shit-stirrer in this church” to my face! Now the chaps at the Rotary Club have frozen me out. They said I’ve been making sexist jokes and racist comments about Ukrainians! I ask you, when have I ever made a racist comment? I haven’t a racist bone in my body! And I’ve never signed up to Facebook either. Someone is trying to smear my name. If you ask me, Gordon’s the one behind it all! Well, we’ll see what he has to say, man-to-man.“A look of horror swept Mrs. Norris’ face. "You can’t go in there! I can hear the organ - the choir are in there!”“I don’t care if the whole bloody town is in there!” John yelled, a display of anger that was most unlike him. “This has gone too far. I can’t believe Gordon could be so vindictive. He’d a bad-tempered sod, but I never thought he’d do this. Libel is a serious offence.”He stormed into the church and marched down the aisle, his panicking wife rushing after him.“Alright alright, it wasn’t Gordon. It was me!” She grabbed his arm. He halted.“What?”“I did it.”John shook his head. “Why are you trying to protect him? Do you fancy him or something? Is there more to this?”“No! No of course I don’t! Look, I signed up to Facebook so I could access the church page but I used your name. I know I shouldn’t have but, well surely you must know how members of this church treat me? I’d have been blocked immediately!”John’s face had gone through several shades of red and was now the color of raw steak.“You, Did what? You’ve been spreading lies and racist comments using an account with my name? What the hell am I married to?” He walked round the side of the organ. “Bloody hell!”Mrs. Norris shoved him aside, wondering what had shocked him. “That’s her! She’s the one who’s caused all this! The little tart! She’s bringing filth and depravity to this church!”John glared at his wife. “I’d say your own venom has done that already, Patricia.” He turned and stormed off. “I’m going home. To pack a few things. I’m going to stay at my brother’s for a bit. And you, well you can go to Hell.”“Gordon, do you hear somebody shouting?” Jenna sighed as she felt his warm cum fill her.“Probably just a bit of rowdy teen behavior outside,” Gordon replied with a smirk.To be continued.By Blacksheep, for Literotica.
The Curate loses his virginity.By Blacksheep. Listen to the Podcast at Steamy Stories.At this Sunday’s service, there was much talk of the upcoming harvest festival. Members of the congregation were encouraged to donate fruit and vegetables, along with non-perishable items for the local foodbank.Jenna had made an effort and brought along a bag of apples. She placed the bag on the side table in the church hall.“I don’t know how a brazen hussy like you has the cheek to set foot in a church.”Jenna remained calm, as she turned to face Mrs. Norris. “Well I’m a Christian, the same as you.”“Huh! Christian my foot. I saw what you and the organist were getting up to and I think it’s disgusting! In the church of all places! And he’s old enough to be your father!”“Well if you clutch those pearls of yours any tighter they’ll crumble to dust. And Gordon and I happen to be consenting adults. Single consenting adults. So there.”“Why you, you, .horrid little slag!” Mrs. Norris fumed, lip quivering. She stormed off.Jenna exhaled and rolled her eyes.“Coffee or tea?” a friendlier voice asked. It was Debbie, the Sunday school teacher, who was volunteering to do today’s hot drinks rota in the hall.“Tea please,” Jenna replied.“You ok?”“Yeah. I don’t think I’ll be on her Christmas card list.”“Don’t let that old bag get to you. She’s a nasty one. She’s horribly ageist. Not to mention xenophobic too. I overheard her mocking Yulia’s English skills last week. I can’t stand her. Her husband’s not that bad, he’s a tedious fusspot, but there’s no malice in him. But her, she’s poison.”“I heard her hubby spreads gossip on Facebook.” Jenna said.“More likely that’s her doing.” Debbie replied. “I’d be surprised if John Norris even knows how to switch on a laptop.”A brief chill ran through Jenna. What if Mrs. Norris were to post some bile about her online? “I don’t use social media anymore,” she said. “Briefly poked my nose into Twitter as a teen, but didn’t like the pile-ons.”“Wise. I’m on Facebook, but only to keep up with church stuff. I never post anything about my private life. I imagine Mrs. Norris would have a stroke if she knew I was dating a woman. A married woman at that. Keep it to yourself. I’m not ready to come out yet.”“Don’t worry, I won’t say a word.”Jenna sipped her tea quietly as she observed the other members of the congregation file into the hall. She was hoping Reverend Morris would soon arrive, but after fifteen minutes, there was still no sign of him. Then there was Gordon; he never came into the hall after a service, and he’d sent her that amusing text message on Friday, about Charles Wesley and his “bulging hymn book.”She headed out of the hall, in search of Gordon, when Josh the curate came staggering in, carrying a massive pile of hymn books. He almost collided with Jenna and dropped a couple of books.“Oh! I’m so sorry!” Josh stammered. “How clumsy of me.”Jenna bent down and picked up the books. “You’re loaded up like a pack horse. Let me give you a hand. Where are you taking all these?”“Um. So kind!” His pale cheeks went pink. “The storeroom at the far end of the hall. These are spare hymn books.”“Ok. Lead the way. By the way, you haven’t seen the vicar have you?”“"Oh, he and the organist are in a meeting. One of the organ pipes has just been repaired.”“Damn,” Jenna muttered under her breath. “Oh dear. How sad. I guess he’ll miss his tea and biscuits.”She followed Josh down to the storeroom. She’d never paid much attention to the curate before, but looking at him now, she realized that he was rather cute. Mid-twenties, tall and stocky with fair hair and a chubby face. There was an endearing innocence about him. Reverend Morris had said he was hoping to complete his ordination next year and become a fully-fledged vicar. He’d been impressed by his devotion to the church - but he needed to come out of his shell a bit and interact more with worshippers. Josh was a shy man and lacking in self-confidence. Remembering this information made Jenna smile.I think this innocent curate needs some other kind of help,The storeroom was vast, and crammed from floor to ceiling with box files, books, old furniture and plastic crates.“Holy sh,, I didn’t know this room existed. And what a lot of stuff for one small church!” Jenna exclaimed.“Heh, yeah.” Josh said, putting the books down. “It’s not just for St Michael’s. We share it with St John’s and the Methodist church on Oakwood Road.”Jenna began putting the books on the shelf.“Um you don’t need to do that,”"Jenna.”Josh blushed again. “Jenna. It’s kind of you to do that but,”"Oh I don’t mind. Why should you have to do all the donkey work? This room is a tip. Besides, a good Christian should help others, right? Especially the vicar’s right-hand man. That’s what a curate is, yes?”Josh relaxed a bit. “Pretty much, yeah. Like Batman and Robin.”“Have you always wanted to be a curate?”Josh sat down on a stool. “In truth, no way. I wasn’t religious at all when I was a kid. I suffered from crippling shyness. I used to dread being asked to read in front of the class. When I was ten, my dad walked out, and that affected me a lot. Haven’t seen him since. Mum turned to drink, I relied on my grandad for support. He became a father figure to me. He used to be a vicar. Thanks to him I survived my teens and passed my exams. I was eighteen when he died. That’s when I decided I wanted to follow in his footsteps. Without him - and God, I fear, well I may have gone down a dark path. Got in with a bad crowd. Taken drugs, self-harmed, maybe ended up in jail.”“Wow.” Jenna replied, realizing how cosseted and safe her upbringing had been. “Well I’m so glad your grandad was there for you.”“There are still days when I doubt myself and I’m in a bad place. I feel useless.”“Don’t put yourself down,” Jenna said, walking towards him. “You’re an amazing role model, especially for younger people.”Josh blinked. “You, think so?”“I do. Plus, you’re really cute. Has a girl ever told you that before?”Josh blushed. “Err, no-one except my Nan. I don’t think she counts.”“Women round here must be blind,” Jenna added, making him squirm with embarrassment. She leant forward and planted a kiss on his lips. He trembled, cheeks turning redder.“J-Jenna, don’t,”"It’s alright Josh. You’re not committing a sin or anything. We’re not inside the church, if that’s you’re worried about.”“N-no, it’s not that. I, um,” The curate sighed. "I, I’m just scared of, I don’t know if I can, do this.”She already knew he was single and straight, but decided to question him. “Do you have a girlfriend?”“No, but, um, that’s the problem really. I’d like one, but I wouldn’t know how to tell her,”Jenna stroked his arm. "Tell her what?”“I worry she’d laugh at me.”“Josh. Whatever it is, I promise I would never laugh at you. And I will understand.”He looked down. “Shit. I’m twenty-five. And I’m still a virgin! I’ve never gone beyond kissing a girl.”She kissed his cheek again. “Oh Josh. That’s nothing to feel awkward about. In fact I admire you. In this age when we’re bombarded with over-sexualized imagery 24/7 both online and offline, finding someone who’s chosen to wait is pretty awesome in my opinion. I lost mine just days after reaching the age of consent. I couldn’t wait to lose it. But that’s just me,”"Yeah but, I, um,”She pulled him to his feet and gently coaxed the truth out of him. "You want to lose your virginity, yes?”“More than anything. But, dating today is scary. It’s a minefield. Especially after Me Too. I’m afraid. I don’t want to say the wrong thing and come across as some horny creep,”Jenna held back a chuckle. Mrs. Norris probably thinks of me as a horny creep. She thought."I get that. But trust me. I don’t think a sweet, kind-hearted man of God like you could ever be a creep. Horny yes, nothing wrong with that of course.” She winked at him and he gulped. “How about it? I think you’re ready right now.”His eyes widened. “W-what? Here?”“Why not? It’s nice and private, And you’re a really sexy curate!” Her face was just inches from his own, hovering there. Then her lips were on his, dancing there softly for a moment before pulling away.“Jenna,” He was already rock hard, and hoped his cassock had disguised this fact."Shush. You’re very special.” She whispered, barely audible. “You’re warm, caring, You’re strong. You deserve to be experience the joys of the flesh.” She kissed him again. It’s okay to feel nervous. First time is always a bit nerve-racking. But just relax. You’ll be just fine,”What an adorable lamb to the slaughter, Jenna thought to herself. He’s so scared and unsure. I’ve never seduced a virgin before, so I’d better not go too hard on him. I do love a challenge. With a bit of encouragement, this sweet guy could have real potential.The touch of her lips sent a fire through his body, a jolt that brought a tingle to every micron of his skin. “Oh, Jenna!”“Shhh.” Her lips caressed his own, then his nose, his ear. “Don’t talk just now, okay?”“Mmm?”She kissed him again, gently caressing his upper lip between her own. At last, he responded.“Josh.” Jenna smiled cheekily. “You’re a pretty good kisser, you know that?”“Really?”Just relax. I’m not going anywhere, there’s no rush. All we have to do is discover each other. There’s no hurry. No-one’s going to come in here. I imagine the vicar will be busy for ages.“Jenna ran her hand down the front of his black cassock. "Oh my, you’re more than ready. "Let’s get these buttons unfastened.” She knelt before him, opening the cassock and revealing the black trousers underneath. And another straining crotch bulge.“I’m going to worship you,” she whispered, unbuckling his belt and unzipping his trousers. Josh was wearing plain black briefs underneath. It was fun seeing the different types of undies men wore. First there was Reverend Morris with his “holy boxers,” then Gordon and his sensible white y-fronts, now Josh with smart black tight-fitting briefs.“Everything will be fine. I promise. Close your eyes if it makes you feel better, okay?”The curate hesitated still, but Jenna’s smile was reassuring and gentle. “I promise you’ll like it.” With a shudder, Josh squeezed his eyes tight as his trousers and underwear were lowered, and he could feel the cool air of the room, then Jenna’s warm breath on his manhood.“There we are.”He couldn’t resist a peek, through half-closed eyes. He was painfully stiff, of course, harder than he’d ever been in his life, but he didn’t need his eyes to tell him that. He shivered as Jenna ran her hand through his pubes and stooped to kiss him there. He gasped as her smooth palm encircled him.“Oh my God!”“Mmm. So beautiful. Truly God’s gift to women. Just relax, don’t fight the feeling. Isn’t it nice?” Jenna kissed the very tip of his member, and he gasped and moaned, his muscles tensing. “Don’t fight it now Josh, just let the feelings come. Relax and let it take you. You don’t have to hold it back, just let it come.” With that, she closed her lips around his head, tasted him with her tongue.“Uh! Oh Jesus!” The curate groaned. The crescendo was boiling in him now, wonderful and frightening and exhilarating. Nothing could have prepared him for the warm embrace of a woman’s mouth, the slight roughness of her tongue as she rolled it up and down his length. No porn, no fantasy could have approached the sensation of her lips gently drawing on his cock, coaxing him towards a peak of indescribable pleasure. The fire was in him and around him, consuming him and his thoughts until all that he was became the connection with her, his flesh and her mouth. Her hands cradled his cock gently as he built towards climax, his breathing becoming rapid and shallow.“Oh,”"Let it come.”Josh sighed deeply in relief as Jenna enveloped him again, shuddered as he felt himself swell between her lips, as he released himself to her, surrendered to her, spurting his cum. She lingered over his manhood, slowly coaxing him down from the heights of his ecstasy. She gently licked his shaft and kissed a drop of his essence from the tip, and smiled up at him.“That wasn’t so bad, was it?” She said, standing up. “Did you enjoy your first blowjob?”“Jenna. Fucking hell!”“I’ll take that as a yes?”“Yes!” he gasped.“Oh good. Because we’re not done yet. You don’t get off that easily you know!” Jenna began unfastening her skirt, letting it fall to the floor. Josh’s eyes widened. She wasn’t wearing any panties.An old, battered table was in the middle of the storeroom. Jenna cleared it and reclined on it, spreading her legs and unfastening her blouse. No bra!“Your turn.”Josh crossed himself.“Just trust your instincts.” She whispered, lowering herself onto her back. Josh stared at her for a second, dumbstruck by her beauty and timid as a deer. Her gently smiling face and the flowing red hair that framed it, the round fullness of her breasts, her long legs, and the tantalizing lure of her wet womanhood between,Finding his courage at last, Josh moved close. With a shaky hand he reached out and tentatively cupped her left breast. Tracing the nipple with his thumb, ever so gently.“Mmm nice, Josh. Keep going!”Encouraged, Josh lowered his mouth to her other breast, the memory of the delightful sensations she’d given him earlier fresh in his mind. He felt her run her fingers through his short blonde hair as he tasted her with his tongue, heard her sigh as he closed his lips around her nipple.“Gently now.”“Sorry!”The curate feasted on her breasts for a bit longer, before moving down to her abdomen, planting more kisses, then he paused for a moment. Jenna said nothing, silently urging him to carry on, and he did. Tentatively, he kissed the inside of her thighs, tracing a finger through the trimmed hair above her slit.Josh continued to lovingly kiss her thighs, his nerves beginning to fade. The heady scent of her was overpowering, emboldening him to trail a finger between her cunt lips. The wetness he felt there surprised him, and he glanced up.“You’re doing great, Josh.” Jenna answered in a throaty whisper. “Please don’t stop.”He ran a finger over her clit, causing her to let out a moan. Lowering his head, he caressed her softly with his mouth, tasting her.“Oh Josh,” He suckled gently on her clit and she let out a scream."Jenna?” He pulled away from her, his fear returning. “Did I hurt you?”“No Josh. It was incredible, that’s all. When you licked me down there, wow. You sure know how to thrill a woman. You learn quick! But don’t make me cum just yet. Because I want you inside me when it happens.”Josh’s heart leapt into his throat. “Oh,”"Are you ready?”“Um, but protection, I-I don’t have a condom,”"It’s okay, you don’t need to worry. I’m on the Pill.”“Oh, right. Good,”"Think of this as doing God’s work,” Jenna purred, urging him to get on with it. She was eager to feel that virgin cock inside her.Slowly he positioned himself above her on the creaking table. Jenna took his cock in her hand, guiding him. He felt the head of his organ nestle inside her.“Lord in Heaven!” It was such exquisite torture, fighting the urge to cum as fast as he could. The feel of her cunt as it sheathed him was beyond even the joys he’d felt already.At first, he slipped in and out of her slowly. He buried his face in her neck.“Umm, oh God Josh. Yes! Go harder!”Jenna slowly relaxed her control, allowing him to work his cock in and out of her more forcefully. He thrust in deep, as far as he could, and gasped, savoring the sensation.“Oh Josh, that’s so good!”He speeded up, as she wrapped her legs round him. Soon he was pounding her like a pro.“Jenna!” He could feel his climax coming now, a mighty force of almost Biblical proportions. Just as Jesus drove out many devils, Josh drove out his virginity, casting it aside forever. He’d been freed.“Ugh!” With a roar of release the curate came, filling Jenna’s womanhood with his seed. Josh wasn’t sure how long his orgasm lasted. But he knew that it was wonderful, an epiphany of sensation, and that Jenna writhed and gasped in the throes of her own climax in perfect harmony with his.When they’d both calmed down, Jenna held him close and kissed him. “Are you okay? You were amazing, Josh, do you know that? How are you feeling?”“Just fantastic, absolutely fantastic! I, wow. That was, incredible. Um, do you mind if I say a quick prayer for both of us?”“Not at all. You go ahead.”When he’d finished, he opened his eyes and looked at Jenna, who was smiling broadly. “You are going to become a bloody amazing vicar!” She said.An Erotic Dream & an organ lesson.T'was the Year of Our Lord 1739, and on a road bound for London, weary preacher and hymn writer Charles Wesley had just arrived at a tavern.“Innkeeper! I hath been riding all day and my poor horse be in the great need of water and rest. As am I.” Charles said.“Fear thee not, good fellow, I’ll tend to thine horse!” The innkeeper replied. “If it’s a room for the night you’re looking for, then ye hath come to the right place. Here at the Lamb Inn, there’s always a warm greeting for a weary traveler. I’ll leave ye in the capable hands of my fine wench Jen, who is adept at making gentlemen feel welcome,”"Greetings to you sir!” Jen said, and Charles was a little taken aback by this stunning redheaded wench. “If you’d like to follow me, I’ll lead you to your bedchamber.” She picked up a candle and gave him a seductive smirk.“Gladly, Miss!” Charles replied, following her up the creaking wooden staircase. In the main room, sounds of merriment filled the air as many men supped ale and enjoyed the company of willing wenches.“I see you’re a man of faith, sir,” said Jen as she reached the top of the stairs. “Have you travelled far?”“Aye, all the way from Bristol. I write many hymns. I’m going to visit my older brother John, who’s in London. He’s a preacher too. In fact he,”"Oh gosh, of course! Your brother must be John Wesley, founder of that Methodist movement I keep hearin’ about!”“That’s right! I’m Charles Wesley.”Jen entered the bedchamber. “Here we are, Mr. Wesley. I trust the room is to your liking? This happens to be a new room - never been used before. Bed never slept in, chair never sat on, chamber pot never,”"Ah, glorious!” Charles interrupted her. “It looks most excellent. I am indeed blessed to have been afforded such kindness. God is good!”“Mmm, thanks be to God,” Jen replied, eyeing up Charles. He was young and rather attractive for a man of the cloth. Most of the clergy she’d encountered in her life had been very old men.“There be a fresh jug of water on the table for you, Mr. Wesley. We’re lucky here. The Lamb has a deep well which provides safe, clean water to drink. That’s why we get so many visitors desperate to quench their thirst without worry of getting the flux.”Charles nodded as he put his bag down on the chair and removed his black robe. That four poster bed looked so inviting.“Why don’t you sit on the bed, Mr. Wesley? I cannot help but wonder, after all that riding, do you not grow a little stiff?”“Um, I am a little stiff, yes.”“Then come over here and sit beside me.” Jen said, patting the bed. “I’d be interested to hear about your hymn writing.”Charles bashfully did as she asked. “Well right now, I am working on a "Hymn for Christmas Day.” But I confess I have only written the first verse.“Perchance could I hear this first verse?” Jen replied.Charles nodded.“Hark how all the Welkin ringsGlory to the King of Kings,Peace on Earth, and Mercy mild,God and Sinners reconciled!”“I’d say that’s a marvelous first verse,” said Jen. “Very stirring, very uplifting. It makes one, rise to the occasion.” Her hand had somehow ended up on his thigh.“Oh do you think so? That pleases me greatly, Miss! Now if only I could complete it.”Jen removed her mobcap, revealing long, tumbling red locks. Charles gazed, mesmerized. “By all the saints, you’re a pretty woman, Miss,”"Jen, Mr. Wesley, perhaps I can be of some help to you.” She blew out the candle. “Oh my! Now we’re in the dark. How careless of me! We’ll just have to,”"Oh Miss Jen!” Charles gasped as her hand groped him in an intimate place.“I think you’ve risen to the occasion Mr. Wesley!”A few moments later and the good wench had relieved the dear Mr. Wesley of his breeches and cast off the rest of his apparel, including a periwig. The preacher produced naked, stiff, and erect, a wonderful maypole. Jen put her hands to this fine example of maleness and her actions had the desired effect.“Ah! I think my inspiration is returning!”“I’m filled with joy, Mr. Wesley! Tis an honor to help you!”“Joyful all ye Nations rise,Join the Triumph of the Skies,Universal Nature say"Christ the Lord is born to Day!”“That’s a wonderful second verse!” Jen ran her tongue round the preacher’s erect member, before taking his entire length into her mouth.“Oh Lord in Heaven, I have given in to sin, but if the sin results in a completed hymn, will thou look upon me with mercy?” Charles gasped, as the pleasure overwhelmed him.Jen withdrew. “The Lord will indeed pardon you, Mr. Wesley. Now please relax and enjoy my help!”“Ah, oh my God, thine tongue is divine, it feels so good!”Jen sucked, licked and teased Charles’ cock until he could take no more.“Miss Jen! I’m going to spend! Oh, yes!”“Ahh, I have been anointed by your holy essence, Mr. Wesley!” Jen giggled as she eagerly gobbled up his seed.Charles’ face bore an expression of utter bliss and satisfaction. “Oh Miss Jen. I am so grateful God delivered me to this inn. What sweet pleasures you have afforded me this evening!”A furious knocking on the bedchamber door disturbed the blissful ambience.“Jen! Jen! You need to get up!” a woman shouted.“Is that, the innkeeper’s wife?” Charles wondered, still dazed after his powerful orgasm.Jen licked the remaining cum off the preacher’s softening cock. “Mm, sounds like Mother. But wait, Mother died of smallpox ten years ago, so how, ?”Everything seemed to fade away in a strange haze.“Jen! You’re going to be late for work! Wake up!”Jenna finally awoke. “Huh? What?”“Are you alright?” Her mum shouted. “Answer me or I’m coming in.”“Um yeah. I’m fine Mum!” She rolled over and reached for her smartphone. Squinting, she looked at the clock.“Shit! I overslept!”Breakfast was a rushed affair, with Jenna barely able to drink half a cup of coffee and a piece of toast.“For goodness cake, slow down before you choke on that,” her mum said.“Can’t believe I overslept. I set my phone. I’ve never done that before.” Jenna said.“Hey, we all do it sometimes. Though your exertions at church no doubt kept you up late. Your dad and I noticed how much time you’ve been spending at St. Michael’s. Now feel free to tell me to mind my own business, but what’s with the sudden obsession with church? You’ve never been interested before. You used to laugh at Gran for being in the Mother’s Union.”“I guess the pandemic made me think about things differently,” Jenna lied, trying to think up a good excuse. “I know I never attended church much before, but I never stopped being a believer.”“That’s great, Jen. I’m glad it makes you happy. I just hope you’re not spending all your time with old people, though. It’s good to mix with people your own age.”“Oh there’s a good mix of different ages at St Michael’s. They’re not all boomers, Mum. The curate, Yulia and Debbie aren’t much different to me. And Reverend Morris, .he’s amazing.”“I’m sure he is,” her mum replied, with a wry grin. “You out tonight?”“Yes. Choir practice.” Jenna grabbed her bag and car keys.“By the way, who’s Charles Wesley?”“Um, what?”“You were yelling his name over and over in your sleep. You must’ve been dreaming.”“Oh. Well he’s a guy who wrote a lot of great hymns. He lived in the 18th century. He wrote that famous carol "Hark the Herald Angels Sing”, although the original words were different. Gotta go. Love you. Bye!“Jenna’s mum shook her head. "Charles Wesley? When I was growing up, I used to dream about Brad Pitt.”“I have got to get a place of my own,” Jenna muttered to herself as she headed to the car. “That was cringe.”Jenna had prepared herself for her evening “choir practice” with Gordon, by wearing her best lingerie and a sexy dress that perfectly highlighted her curves and cleavage. The organist himself had also made an effort, by wearing his best suit and tie. With his black robe unfastened, he resembled an old-fashioned headmaster.“Hello there!” Gordon said, grinning from ear to ear. Whoa, she looked drop-dead gorgeous. He was practically drooling like a dog in heat.“Not so bad yourself, Gordon!” Jenna replied. “Love the suit. Now all you need is a cane.”“A cane?”“To punish me with. You see, I’ve been a naughty girl. I forgot to practice that piece of music you mentioned.”“Oh dearie me,” Gordon said, walking over to her. “Whatever am I to do with such a naughty girl? Never mind. I’m sure you can make it up to me some way,”He sat down on the organ stool. "Come sit in my lap, Jenna. We’re going to play a little tune together. I’m sure you can do it.”“Why Gordon, I’m not sure I can play this. It’s a bit of a step up from the piano.”“Just give it a try. I’m sure you’ll learn quick!” He winked. “Try the third manual,” he added, indicating one of the keyboards.Jenna bit her lip and slid onto Gordon’s lap. She deliberated wiggled about a bit, causing him to let out a groan. “This seat is a little, hard!”Jenna began playing the first few notes. “You’re right, Kings and Queens does sound fantastic on a pipe organ. I’d have never guessed you were an Ava Max fan, Gordon.”“Hah, I’m not. Can’t stand modern pop music. But the younger members of the choir are always begging for this song. You’re great at this!”As Jenna continued to play, Gordon began massaging her breasts and kissing her exposed neck.“Oh Gordon,” Jenna sighed.“There’s a part-time job available,” he continued, between kisses. "An assistant choirmaster and pianist at the Sunday school. Three days a week. The school isn’t just open on Sundays anymore. There’s a crèche and breakfast club on Wednesdays. They do after-school sessions for kids who have special needs. It’s not bad money. I know you’ve got all the relevant qualifications. If you’re interested, I could easily pull a few strings and get you in.”Jenna suddenly halted her playing. “Wow, are you serious?”“Of course I am. Look, the young ‘uns think I’m some kind of ogre. And they’re probably right. But you, you’d be such an asset to the school. And tell me honestly, do you truly enjoy working in a call center?”“I hate it. The pay is shit and I hate my boss. Now she’s a real-life ogre.”“Exactly. Your talents are wasted in a dead-end job like that, Jenna. It’s up to you of course, but please give it some thought.”She turned round to face him. Kissing him hard the lips, she slipped her arms round his shoulders. “I’ve given it thought. I accept! Now why don’t you let me thank you properly, Gordon?”Jenna hiked up her dress, and unfastened Gordon’s belt. She unzipped his trousers, pushed down his underpants, and his rock hard erection sprang free from its encumbrance. Unable to contain himself any longer, Gordon pulled aside the crotch of her damp panties, positioned himself to her entrance, and pushed himself into her. The soft lips between her legs parted, and she threw her head back in sudden ecstasy as the organist began thrusting himself in and out of her warm body, slowly at first, then building in speed.Outside, a black 4 by 4 had just pulled up in the church car park. John Norris got out of the driver’s side and furiously slammed the door shut.“John please, don’t do this!” his wife pleaded. “Not in the church!”“Look Patricia, I want to get to the bottom of this. First Gordon angrily accuses me of spreading lies on Facebook. He called me "the biggest shit-stirrer in this church” to my face! Now the chaps at the Rotary Club have frozen me out. They said I’ve been making sexist jokes and racist comments about Ukrainians! I ask you, when have I ever made a racist comment? I haven’t a racist bone in my body! And I’ve never signed up to Facebook either. Someone is trying to smear my name. If you ask me, Gordon’s the one behind it all! Well, we’ll see what he has to say, man-to-man.“A look of horror swept Mrs. Norris’ face. "You can’t go in there! I can hear the organ - the choir are in there!”“I don’t care if the whole bloody town is in there!” John yelled, a display of anger that was most unlike him. “This has gone too far. I can’t believe Gordon could be so vindictive. He’d a bad-tempered sod, but I never thought he’d do this. Libel is a serious offence.”He stormed into the church and marched down the aisle, his panicking wife rushing after him.“Alright alright, it wasn’t Gordon. It was me!” She grabbed his arm. He halted.“What?”“I did it.”John shook his head. “Why are you trying to protect him? Do you fancy him or something? Is there more to this?”“No! No of course I don’t! Look, I signed up to Facebook so I could access the church page but I used your name. I know I shouldn’t have but, well surely you must know how members of this church treat me? I’d have been blocked immediately!”John’s face had gone through several shades of red and was now the color of raw steak.“You, Did what? You’ve been spreading lies and racist comments using an account with my name? What the hell am I married to?” He walked round the side of the organ. “Bloody hell!”Mrs. Norris shoved him aside, wondering what had shocked him. “That’s her! She’s the one who’s caused all this! The little tart! She’s bringing filth and depravity to this church!”John glared at his wife. “I’d say your own venom has done that already, Patricia.” He turned and stormed off. “I’m going home. To pack a few things. I’m going to stay at my brother’s for a bit. And you, well you can go to Hell.”“Gordon, do you hear somebody shouting?” Jenna sighed as she felt his warm cum fill her.“Probably just a bit of rowdy teen behavior outside,” Gordon replied with a smirk.To be continued.By Blacksheep, for Literotica.
Aaron Judge is a superstar because he looks like a superstar. Pete Alonso on the other hand, not so much.
Did you watch the Oscars? They're the biggest movie awards in the world! This year's Oscars were great! There was a movie called "Everything Everywhere All at Once". It won seven awards! 你會看奧斯卡頒獎典禮嗎?這是全世界最大的電影獎項,今年有一部電影叫做「媽的多重宇宙」贏了七項大獎! An actress called Michelle Yeoh is in the movie. She plays a laundromat owner who gets superpowers! 這部片的女主角是楊紫瓊,她飾演一個有超能力的洗衣店老闆娘。 Michelle Yeoh is from Malaysia. This year, she won the Oscar for Best Actress. She's the first actor from Asia to win the Best Actress award. 楊紫瓊來自馬來西亞,她今年榮獲最佳女主角獎,是第一個得到這個獎的亞洲演員。 Michelle Yeoh said thank you to her mother for her Oscar. She said "all moms in the world" were the real superheroes! 楊紫瓊感謝她的媽媽,她說全世界的每一個媽媽都是超級英雄。 In Malaysia, her mother watched Michelle Yeoh on TV. Her mother cried with happiness for her "little princess"! 她的母親在馬來西亞看電視轉播的時候喜極而泣。 The same movie had an actor from Vietnam in it. He also won an Oscar. He said thank you to his mother too. 這部電影另一個越南演員也獲得奧斯卡最佳男配角,他也向媽媽道謝。 One of the people who made the movie is from Taiwan. He won an Oscar too. Who do you think he thanked? That's right, his mother! 這部電影其中一個導演,母親是台灣人。他和夥伴得到最佳導演獎,所以他感謝誰呢? 你答對了!是他的媽媽 。 If I won an Oscar, I'd thank my mom too. Who would you thank? ________________________________ Vocabulary 榮獲今年奧斯卡最佳影片的電影,是在講一位擁有超能力的媽媽。 1. cry 哭泣 Do you sometimes cry when watching a movie? 你看電影時會不會哭? Oh, I cry so loud I have to stop myself. 會,我哭得太大聲,還要自己克制。 2. actor 演員 Me too. Usually it's not because of the actors. 我也是。通常都不是因為演員的關係。 Then why do you cry? 那你為什麼哭? It's the story. 是故事。 3. biggest 最大的 I know. Some films have the biggest stars but no real power. 我知道,有些電影有最大咖,但是沒有真正的力量。 Like Batman v. Superman. 比如說蝙蝠俠對超人。 4. movie 電影 But I love that movie! 可是我很愛那部電影! Oh, so much for liking a good story. 講了半天只喜歡好故事… 來讀單字。 cry 哭泣 actor 演員 biggest 最大的 movie 電影 ________________________________ Quiz 1. Which movie won seven Oscars this year? A: Avatar: The Way of Water B: Everything Everywhere All at Once C: Top Gun: Maverick 2. Which Oscar did Michelle Yeoh win? A: Best Actor B: Best Actress C: Best Supporting Actress 3. Where is Michelle Yeoh from? A: Malaysia B: Mongolia C: Myanmar Answers 1. B 2. B 3. A
Chris has a dream about Kevin Killeen? And He is compared to Batman when he just dissapears. Dean DeVor talks about how much snow and preperation for the next couple of days. Lambert Airport is getting ready for the storm and Rhonda Hamm-Niebruegge the executive Director at Lambert International Airport calls in.
Start your day with faith and encouragement as Pastor Kerrick and guests share to help you live the lifestyle of faith. Thank you for joining us for Faith In The Morning!Order Your Copy of Jesus, Son of Rahab today: http://www.fccga.com/storeFollow Pastor Kerrick's Blog:https://kerricksblog.wordpress.com/In today's podcast, Pastor Kerrick shared a clip of "The Wisdom of Dominion." To watch the full message, click here: https://subspla.sh/y3gnb95
Andrew shares how a simple gift made all the difference to his day.... and you guessed it: he connected it to the kingdom of heaven.
The boys get together for another fresh episode full of new vehicle opportunities for Hector, Electric cars vs Gasoline cars, and the immigration of Indians to Trinidad and More. Hit that Subscriber bottom to get a new episode or two every week.
Like Batman standing arms outstretched while the bats swirl around him, we share our own origin stories of living through moments of utter chaos to emerge more regulated, experienced parents and teachers. We talk about when lack of sleep becomes an emergency for a new mom, asking for help from your support system and how to prioritize emotional regulation while caring for children. From food to environment to community and mental health, taking care of yourself IS taking care of your child! And for those moments when you lose it (like everyone does) we talk through how to apologize to children and repair the relationship. Join Very Good Mother's Club to be a part of our community and get your questions answered on a future episode! Find Jess at Jessica Hover on Youtube and @jess_hover on Instagram Find Layne @enquiryco on Instagram
Emory Morsberger is the superhero of community development! Like BATMAN - when Emory hears the call - Emory shows up. Creatin spectacular developments to recreate entire neighborhood - Emory Morsberger knows how to create an infrastructure that creates financial stability for new neighborhoods.
Si picks the hands-down winner in a fight between Superman and Batman in this episode recorded before his lung surgery. John-David thinks time travel in movies is just wrong. Godwin recalls a bull-riding injury. Si shares more about his surgery. And if the boys could time-travel to biblical times, who would want to see the Red Sea parting, and which one would choose to be there at the feeding of the 5,000 with loaves and fish? Plus, they share some advice with a fellow hunter who's frustrated with his friend. https://tommyjohn.com/duck — These are amazing! Get 20% OFF your first order right now! https://www.mypillow.com/duck — Get up to 66% OFF with promo code DUCK! -- Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
This week we're joined by Houston artist OMG2RAW!! We discuss music, his new album “Before the world ends” and plenty of fuck s*** we also touch on Planting seeds good ones and bad ones….and more….. Follow Us On IG: http://instagram.com/krimskrib http://instagram.com/krimhpr http://instagram.com/maria_yerena http://instagram.com/rodawgz_ Follow 2Raw: http://instagram.com/omg2raw Recorded and edited by: http://instagram.com/creativemindzhtx
This weeks featured beer Is: Thrills and Spills from Redemption Rock Brewing(a beer so nice we drank it twice) This week Steve and jimmy talk about Ezra miller and his ongoing issues. Then they laugh about Chris rock and his opinion of the whole Charlie and the chocolate factory ordeal. They share our feelings about Netflix and how they treat their employees and also talk about the terrible loss of Fred ward and Trevor strnad(the black dahalia murder). Followed by wrestling roundup and then we dive into our rewatch roulette movie: Nightbreed. Listen to find out what next weeks movie will be. Call us and leave a Voicemail, we might feature it on the show Call (508) 271-7824 You can find us on social media @ https://www.facebook.com/Nerdsofunusualorigin/ https://www.instagram.com › nerdsofunusualorigin
On this podcast interview, Mr. C speaks with Kyle, a TrikePatrol cameraman from The Philippines. It's rare to have such an interview so we really appreciate him joining us. He provides such a unique perspective into the life and times of a Trike Patrol cameraman in The Philippines. Like Batman or The Dread Pirate Roberts, there have been many to "wear the suit" along the way, but it was quite interesting to hear from one of them himself.
On this week's episode of the Worst. Comic. Podcast. EVER!: We say thank you to a true titan of the comic book industry. Neal Adams passed away on April 28. So much of what we know in comics comes back to Adams' drawing table. Like Batman? The Batman you know started with Adams and Denny O'Neil. Like seeing creators get recognition for their characters on the silver screen? That credit goes to Neil. The introduction of Tim Drake as Robin sporting a new costume? That's all Adams. We could spend multiple shows discussing Neil and his legacy in comics. We finally get a chance to wrap up Planet Comicon Kansas City. What a weekend! As always, Kansas City steps up to support the Hero Initiative. We had a blast hanging out at our table with artist Richard Pace. And we are already making plans for Planet Comicon 2023 next March. We look at 52 #35 with the new year starting out with a bang. As in the bang of bodies falling from the sky. Once again, we find ourselves asking why anyone would ever live in Metropolis. We have our Pick 3 selections, sponsored by our friends at Clint's Comics in Kansas City. We would love to hear your comments on the show. Let us know what you've been reading or watching this week. Contact us on our website, Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, or by email. We want to hear from you! As always, we are the Worst. Comic. Podcast. EVER! and we hope you enjoy the show. The Worst. Comic. Podcast. EVER! is proudly sponsored by Clint's Comics. Clint's is located at 3941 Main in Kansas City, Missouri, and is open Monday through Saturday. Whether it is new comics, trade paperbacks, action figures, statues, posters, or T-shirts, the friendly and knowledgeable staff can help you find whatever it is that you need. You should also know that Clint's Comics has the most extensive collection of back issues in the metro area. If you need to find a particular book to finish the run of a title, head on down to Clint's or check out their website at clintscomics.com. Tell them that the Worst. Comic. Podcast. EVER! sent you.
Like Batman or the Jedi or uh, the cast of Cocoon, LSV and BK have RETURNED! There's tons to talk about between bans, set champs and Neon Dynasty!
The DTWT boys are back and this time in HD. In our first video pod, we try to work out some of the technical aspects so bear with us as we get it all situated. We will give more details on how to get to see video soon. We start with L.A. reminding us about a time User tried to start his own dance craze. Cam , Antonio and L.A. remembers so crazy break up songs that got us through. In a heavy Entertainment Time Special, we discuss the Jack Harlow casting for the White Man Can't Jump reboot. Will Smith and Micheal B Jordan working together for the first time on a confusing continuation of I Am Legend. We give our current breakdown of Snowfall (spoilers Ep 1-3) (streaming on Hulu and showing FX). L.A. is finally caught up on Bel Air (Spoilers Ep.1-6)(streaming on Peacock). Cam and L.A. give our takes in Jeen-Yus (Spoilers Ep. 1-3) (Now Streaming On Netflix). Lastly we give our full recap of The Batman now in theaters ( FULL SPOILERS) . Follow us on social media @dtwtpod on both Instagram and Twitter and give us your feedback --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/dtwtpod/message
Douglas shares a theory on why The Batman movie was rewinded at a cinema
The boys are back! In this week's return episode, the guys talk about being back in the studio, injured seeing eye dogs, blind catfishing, getting into the wrong car, war veterans returning home, feel good animal videos, Beans' wedding, COVID, Chino's TikTok algorithm, The Batman, the Question of the Episode, Top 5 Batman Movies, Superhero Fight Club, Would You Rather, Sleeper Picks, Homework and much more! REVIEWS: The Batman FEATURE: Top 5 Batman Movies of All Time Segments: Superhero Fight Club #SHFC Would You Rather #WYR Question of the Episode #QOTE Homework Sleeper Picks Listen to us on: iTunes: Chino & Beans Google Play: Chino & Beans Spotify: Chino & Beans Soundcloud: https://soundcloud.com/chinoandbeans *Rate, Review, and Subscribe - tell your friends Follow us on Social Media Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/chinoandbeans/ (@chinoandbeans) Twitter: https://twitter.com/ChinoandBeans (@chinoandbeans) TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@chinoandbeans (@chinoandbeans) Facebook: Chino & Beans
In this week's issue....The Crusade ask themselves "Why is there so much love for The Dark Knight?" and discuss the many traits, elements and tropes that make Batman the most endearing and enduring comic book character for over 80 years. Our Batman Recommendations Don't forget to hit this SUBSCRIBE button #TheBatman #Batman Logo by Belleface Designs, aguignard2287@gmail.com Follow us on our social media
Look, anyone with any knowledge of comics history knows that comics creators in mainstream American comics are, well, pretty darn white. And Batman is no exception; there are no truly long runs by creators of color on any of the flagship Batman titles. But there are some good stories by Black writers on Batman, and so, as this is February and Black History Month, Matt & Will wanted to look at some of those stories. And they brought along ComicsXF writer Corey Smith, so there was an opinion that wasn't just a pair of white guys. Blink (Batman: Legends of the Dark Knight # 156-158) On the Outside (Detective Comics V.3 # 983-987) I Am Batman Begins/Fear State (I Am Batman # 0-3) Thanks to Geri Nonnewitz for our podcast logo Follow the show on Twitter @BatChatComics and support the show on Patreon at www.patreon.com/batchatwithmattandwill
00:59 I found it really interesting. And I was able to kind of look at this in my own business in life. And I was like, Oh, my God, like, yes, it's so true. We're in this newsletter, I'll spare you the whole newsletter, you can go look it up if you want to read it. But he was talking about how Batman was the only superhero outside of a couple others like, you know, smaller time superheroes that weren't born with a superpower. Right? They got their super he got his superpower through his own self proclaimed learning and developing, right, he wasn't born with one much like other superheroes like bat, or like, you know, Superman, right? Who came from like, out of this world, or you know, some of the others, right, you get the details. And so I found that really interesting. And I think that as an entrepreneur, it's vitally important that we kind of take this approach. And I'm going to explain what I mean in just a second. I'm also going to give you some of the things, both mindset in performance, and some of the skills that I've developed to create my own superpowers that helped me grow in business. And I'm going to give you an array of things that have helped me so you can kind of like, see what resonates with you. And hopefully, you know, you'll find some value in this. 2:50 One of the things that a lot of coaches were telling me, and I know this to be true for me in the past, but a lot of coaches and this was like a centralized theme, with so many people is that there's not they're not seeing growth, like not consistent. You know what I mean? Where it's like, despite hiring coaches, or following different strategies and tactics, they're not seeing growth. And some coaches have seen, like, Great months, you know, I've had a couple people tell me, they've hit like 15k 20k 30k months, but then they come spiraling back down to this, like 5k, or 6k. 4:58 These strategies and tactics, they do work, but you'll see results, right? But it's like the frustration comes in where it's like, how do we keep this consistent? You know what I mean? And so the big idea here, and this is what I want you to get down, and I'm going to give you some actual things that you could take away and implement from this episode today. But it largely comes down to this. You have to be able to learn the skills, principles and character traits of who you want to become. Right? And so a lot of times, you'd be like, I'm not sure who I want to become. And if that's the case, you could say, Okay, what's the goal that I'm going after? Right? What is the goal? And so in business, if your revenue goal is to get to, let's just say, $30,000 per month, right? Don't just take my goal, it's whatever your goal is, let's say it's $30,000 per month, you're really, you're right now you're around like the, you know, 678 9k months, and you're like, dude, I'd really just like to get the 30. Or heck, maybe it's even 20 or less, right? Doesn't matter. You want to start asking yourself, and this is kind of the Batman, you know, scenario here is like, well, what skills do I need? Right? Because you're not, you know, you were born with a gift, right? And we're not going to go down that route today. 9:58 We can argue that it goes, whatever. But like, if you can do 50, if you can do $20,000 In a month, you could do $50,000 In a month, usually just getting a few more clients, right? Especially if you're doing medium to high ticket packages, you know what I mean. And then the next phase after that is that like, 50 to a million, right, so where you're doing $100,000 per month and more, all right. And so every level is going to have different skill sets, different character traits, different things that you have to embody. Now it's up to you, just like Batman had to go learn how to become Batman, he's Bruce rate, Bruce Wayne, right, he had to learn the skills of fighting, he had to learn all these things to be able to do that. 14:48 This is what I teach my students: how to learn these skill sets. Because when you learn these skill sets, you'll be able to pay your bill, right. And that's the concept here. And so, um, again, hope you found this valuable. I would love to know what your biggest takeaway was today, if you're on the live or on the if you're on you know, Facebook or Instagram listening to this or YouTube, just put it in the comment section. And if you're on the podcast, I'd love for you just to shoot me a message and let me know what stood out to you the most. Alright, and if you found value in today's episode, or any of the episodes for that matter, I would appreciate it if you would click Subscribe in whatever podcast app, you listen to the podcast on, whether it's apple, iTunes, or Apple's iTunes, Stitcher, Spotify, Google, whatever, right? There's a bunch of different ones. If you could subscribe and leave a five star rating and review I would greatly appreciate it. When you're subscribed, you'll never miss a podcast. Like if you're trying to wait for these on Facebook, it's like that you may miss it, right? But if you're obviously subscribed, you'll never miss the podcast. “You have to be able to learn the skills, principles and character traits of who you want to become. Right? And so a lot of times, you'd be like, I'm not sure who I want to become. And if that's the case, you could say, Okay, what's the goal that I'm going after? Right? What is the goal?.” Keynotes: Dreaming to be a Batman on your field. It took a lot of development to achieve your goal. Strategies and plans work differently for everyone.
“I am supposed to be here, I belong here. I'm doing the right things, I'm there, it just takes time.” This week, I speak with the artist who designed the tie I wore to my wedding, Marcel P. Ames, the owner of X of Pentacles (@xofpentacles), a bespoke Neopolitan clothing company (https://xofpentacles.com/). During our first live conversation together, we swap experiences with anxiety and our fear of failure. I reveal my childhood fear of buttons, whereas Marcel was a button collector, the King of Buttons. Marcel talks about the hardships that helped him kick imposter syndrome and his fear of failure. We both discuss the illusion of stability, fashion's role in self-discovery and how we can go from being passive dreamers to lucid dreamers. Andy reveals his therapy origin story. Like Batman, we work through the pain together, while glimpsing each other's artistic processes. We strive not to be trash but compost. We become friends. To learn more about Marcel's story, check out this motivational speech: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VwEaIwVCxC4&feature=emb_title Thank you for listening. If you have a monologue that you'd like to perform (regardless of gender/sex), don't hesitate to reach out to us at nakedmanpod@gmail.com. If you want to join our community, follow us on Instagram @nakedmanpod. Better yet, give us a call at 747-231-7120 and share your thoughts and feelings with us. --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/nakedmanpod/support
Support Topic Lords on Patreon and get episodes a week early! (https://www.patreon.com/topiclords) Lords: * Stevie * Avery * https://averyburke.bandcamp.com/ Topics: * Collectable cheetos on Ebay * https://www.ebay.com/sch/i.html?_nkw=rare+cheeto * Japanese websites are stuck in the 90s. Any theories? * https://search.marginalia.nu/ * Medieval European and ancient Egyptian philosophy. * Brad asks "Denatured alcohol: alcohol that has poison added to it to prevent people drinking it. What other things do we / could we intentionally pollute to restrict their usage?" * The unusual puzzles of StarTropics. Microtopics: * Defining poop by its shape. * The lava of the human body. * The Content Distribution Baby growing up into a Content Distribution Man. * An angry internet mob that won't say why they're angry so you just have to fix every problem until they go away. * Legally changing your name to add a silent and invisible Bitcoin logo. * Searching for collectible Cheetos on eBay. * A Cheeto shaped like a lobster claw. * Putting a Cheeto shaped like a cockatiel on eBay for months but nobody's buying so you give up and eat it. * Whether there is a subculture of investors collecting rare Cheetos on eBay or if it's just a subculture of people listing Cheetos on eBay as a joke. * heritageauctionsforcheetos.com * Bidding $40,000 on a Cheeto shaped like Harambe when you have no intention of paying, because the worst that can happen is that your eBay score goes down by one point. * Buying a penis-shaped collectible Cheeto for $1.40 but still waiting on it because it got caught up in escrow. * Bidding on an eBay auction and walking away when you get outbid. * Looking at collectible Cheeto auctions and then eBay won't stop trying to sell you posters of ladies canoodling. * Cheeto misprints and their value on the collectors market. * Arnold Schwarzenegger if his legs were joined together like a seal. * The web sites we visited back before the internet had the power to reach into the real world and strangle it. * A search engine optimized to return pages that are mostly static text. * Loading the bottom of your web page with keywords. * Keeping a designer on payroll so that every few years your interface can alternate between having gradients and being flat. * Asking Jeeves things and he tells you the answers, like a modern day Delphi. * Let's play: Flaming Hot Cheetos or Freezing Cold Cheetos? * A cheerleader pyramid made of butlers. * Scraping Wikipedia and formating the results like a book. * A postcard with a picture of Kim Jong Un saying "Live, Laugh, Love." * Pharaoh culture. * A Canticle for Liebowitz. * Medieval monks stumbling into a bomb shelter. * Making an illuminated manuscript of instructions on how to build a bomb so you can give it to the Pope. * The Learned Bede. * The four dudes in your culture who can write and create original work. * Kingdoms in medieval Europe, centered around the manors of rich noble Romans. * Nearly everyone dying from the plague so all the public servants are in their early teens. * Intelligible Forms. * Aristotelean ideas about science. * Going real alien. * Ultra Rare Cheeto Shaped Like The Venerable Bede. * The first dinosaur of Egypt. * Inventing the razor because of your unsightly back hair. * Waking up from anesthetic to find that the surgeon shaved body parts nowhere near the incision site, "because you're a hairy beast." * First, do no hair. * The Egyptian book of the Dead. * The Egyptian conception of the afterlife, where you go underground and a guy with a crocodile head weighs your heart against the Feather of Truth and if your heart balances, you get to sit in a long line with your male predecessors for eternity, and that's the best possible outcome. * Religions competing to provide the best afterlife. * When we as a species learned to attach afterlife outcomes to ethical behavior, as opposed to dying in battle. * Having a dream once where all the great kings, after they die they go to the House of Dust and eat clay for eternity, and deciding that that's a fact. That's canon now. * The nine parts of the soul. * Being constantly surrounded, your whole life, by monuments to death big enough to see from space. * Adding a scent to natural gas so that you can smell when it's filling your house. * Whether antifreeze is sweet and if so can a cat taste antifreeze. * How one might test whether cats can taste sweet. * Tongue meat analysis: a great way to tell. * The Inverted Qualia Problem. * Asking a cat if it can taste sweet, and the cat asks "what does sweet mean" and you say "sweet my internal experience when I put these white crystals in my mouth" and the cat is like "I also have an internal experience when I put these white crystals in my mouth." * A video game related topic. * Trying to locate your missing uncle who has been abducted by aliens. * A video game NPC asking you for a password and to find it you can to have to dip the video game's manual in water in real life. * An 80s video game puzzle that requires you to be familiar with solfege to solve it. * How you could get away with a lot more bullshit back in the 80s. * The experience of suddenly realizing that it's the piece of paper. * Going into a portable trailer made up like a cool bachelor pad and noticing that you don't have a reflection in the mirror and upon further examination realizing that the mirror is actually a window into the same room reversed, down to the clock running counterclockwise. * Sneaking irrelevant puzzles into someone else's room escape game. * Forcing the employees of an escape room to escape an escape room of their own. (Jail.) * The ultimate unrequited high five.
We know the truth Batman is the only character popular enough where anyone can step into the role. So what the hell is Disney thinking when they remove Emilio Estevez from Mighty Ducks season 2? The article referenced in this broadcast: deadline.com/2021/11/emilio-est…andate-1234868978/
We know the truth Batman is the only character popular enough where anyone can step into the role. So what the hell is Disney thinking when they remove Emilio Estevez from Mighty Ducks season 2? The article referenced in this broadcast: https://deadline.com/2021/11/emilio-estevez-leaving-the-mighty-ducks-game-changers-season-2-gordon-bombay-covid-vaccine-mandate-1234868978/
Your favorite baka gaijins are back to talk more American Studios outsourcing anime studios to make content. This time, it's DC and Batman. We watched the 2008 "Batman Gotham Knight," and discussed Batman as a whole, our recent trip to SF's Japantown and more. Enjoy!
In this episode of Journal Talk, Jonathan Leeman chats with Sam Emadi about this article: https://www.9marks.org/article/be-like-batman-guard-the-gospel
In todays episode we talk a little bit about pure evil. Our thoughts behind how people break and how to help correct a soul that has been in a path of darkness for one or more incarnations and also try to throw in some light hearted conversation as well. we hope you enjoy and as always thank you for sitting with us at the round table.
Like Batman, well we do too. Today on the BiG KiD show we play "We Took a Vote" and rank our favorite Batman actors!!!
Jonathan Chiovitti talks with us on this episode of BSBC! John has worked for more than 24 years in film! Wearing many hats as he’s editing, writing, producing and/or directing. As a VFX artist, John tells stories through creative expression with his movies. Like Batman said, “Everything’s impossible until somebody does it.” Our imaginations come to life through film. Check it out on this episode of Black Shirt Black Coffee with the talented Johnathan Chiovitti. #setlife
We are continuing a series of episodes comparing Jesus to superheroes. This series will tackle wrong ideas about Jesus from church history in chronological order. A superhero will represent each of these ideas. Is Jesus Like Batman We answer this question by answering the following: Who is Batman? What are things that Jesus and Batman somewhat have in common? Is Batman divine or human? Does he have any superpowers? What did the Ebionites believe about Jesus? What do the Socinians believe about Jesus? Why does Jesus have to be fully divine as well as fully human? What are problems with Ebionism/Socinianism? A great human teacher cannot be our substitute (Gal 4:1-5). A human who is merely subject to the law cannot be our substitute (Mat 12:8; 9:6). A human-only Jesus cannot bear the penalty for the sins and capital offenses of many people (Lev 24:19-21; Joh 1:29; 1Pe 2:24; Heb 9:28; 2Co 5:21) What are some verses against Ebionism/Socinianism? Jesus is called "God" (Joh 20:28-29 c.f. Psa 35:23; Psa 45:6 c.f. Psa 145:13 and Heb 1:8) Jesus is ascribed the attributes of God (Col 2:9; Psa 102:24-27 c.f. Heb 1:10-12; Isa 44:6 c.f. Rev 1:17-18) Jesus is worshiped as God (Isa 45:12-23 c.f. Php 2:10; Rev 4:10-11, 5:12-14 c.f. Rev 19:10, 22:8-9) Sources Consulted: "https://www.gotquestions.org/Ebionism.html (What is Ebionism?)" Got Questions Ministries. Dr. Joseph R. Nally, Jr., "https://thirdmill.org/answers/answer.asp/file/46662 (What is Ebionism?)" Third Millennium Ministries. "https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ebionites (Ebionites)," Wikipedia.org. "https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Socinianism (Socinianism)," Wikipedia.org. Other Scriptures Referenced: Mathew 22:46 Mark 12:34 Luke 20:40 Matthew 8:20 Luke 9:58 Luke 4:30 John 8:59 John 10:39 ***** Like what you hear? https://www.truthspresso.com/donate (Donate) to Truthspresso and give a shot of support! *****
This week we return with the new Legendary Hero to discuss as well as the next chapter of Blazing Blade for Game Club. We also have a last minute game update preview to go over with the finale of Book IV being announced.
Minisode One of Season Four. In minisodes, we answer questions that our listeners have emailed Jon. In this minisode, Jon talks about Instagram Reels and whether or not it is a true TikTok killer. A full transcript of this episode is available at Jon's entertainment law blog at www.pfeifferlaw.com/entertainment-law-blog/
W 15 odcinku powracamy z segmentem Naprawdę Ciekawa Postać i bierzemy pod lupę postać Batmana z serii Arkham. Ale zanim do tego przejdziemy porozmawiamy o Hadesie od Supergiant Games, A Way Out i Wasteland 3.
Morgan chats with Connor Pardoe, Commissioner of the PPA about tournaments and professional and recreational pickleball. Find out more about the podcast on http://pb.fm/ or follow @MoreorLessPickleball on Facebook. Find out more about Morgan: Morgan's Facebook CoachME Pickleball Find out more about today's guest: Connor Pardoe's Instagram PPA Tournaments Sponsors: CoachME Pickleball Selkirk Sport and the new Vanguard Paddle
In this VERY SPECIAL EPISODE, my guest (and brother in law) Ryan Collins decides to unload on one of comic book cinema's sacred cows, Batman Begins. Listen as we discuss the flaws in this approach, the problems we have, and Christopher Nolan really seems to love the 1% throughout this whole trilogy. --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/whydoyoulikeit/support
This week Addison spills the beans, 4 of them to be exact, on how to improperly walk on a sidewalk (hint: you'll never guess what it is!). So you may need to listen to this episode 4 times while tapping something 4 times and then turning your doorknob 6 times because it's round and doesn't have any corners. Isn't anxiety fun? Also, we could use your help getting a dead kid a shiny new Sainthood. Let's get it done y'all! You might also notice some shiny new cover art! We worked really hard on that and we're really proud how that turned out! Other topics of discussion: A weird way to walk (intro) Kayne 2020 (2:11) Kim K as the first lady (9:25) RayJ's Sex Jeep (11:00) Black market for cheetos on eBay (14:18) The patron saint of the internet (23:22) Helping Carlo become a saint (39:20) Bob Dylan's crazy ass song (41:04) Top Tooth Chew (57:36) Chris gets tricked by a soundboard (1:04:00) You can submit your own thought experiments, questions you want answered, or topics for discussion by: Tweeting at us: @part_time_pod Email: pt.podcasters@gmail.com Voicemail: Anchor voice message (we'd feature it on the show with your permission) It would also really help us out if you could take the time to review the show on Apple Podcasts if you're enjoying it. Thanks for listening and please follow us on Instagram for art based on things we've talked about on the show --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/part-time-pod/message
You may recall that a few months back, I interviewed Dr. David Cox (@davidjcox_). In our discussion, we spent a fair amount of time talking about the literature on the use of psychedelics for the treatment of a variety of behavioral and mental health challenges. I recently got the opportunity to extend this conversation with Dr. Matthew Johnson (@Drug_Researcher). Matt Johnson is a Professor of Psychiatry and Behavioral Sciences at John Hopkins University, and he's been a leading figure in this area of research for over 15 years. His expertise in this area is so well regarded that he's been sought out by media outlets such as (takes deep breath): The New York Times, Washington Post, Wall Street Journal, Globe and Mail, Daily Mail, USA Today, Chicago Tribune, San Francisco Chronicle, Denver Post, Baltimore Sun, CNN, CBS News, NBC News, The Atlantic, Newsweek, Vanity Fair, Marie Claire, Vogue, Whole Living, The Washingtonian, Scientific American, Nature, Vice, Insider, Inverse, Healthline, Psychology Today (pause to inhale...) 60 Minutes, CNN’s Wolf Blitzer Situation Room, Fox Business News’ Kennedy, the Dr. Oz Show, PBS’ Retro Report, Labyrint (television show in the Netherlands), Spectrum News NY1, the BBC World Service, NPR’s Morning Edition, NPR’s Kojo Nnamdi Show, New Zealand Radio, and Newstalk Radio Ireland... just to name a few. Matt has also been featured in a special episode of The Tim Ferriss Show on this very topic. As such, I'm a little more than humbled to chat with him on Behavioral Observations! In our chat, we did a quick overview of Delay Discounting, talked about decision making with condom usage, and the behavioral economics of cannabis. As an aside, we've done quite a few shows on Behavioral Economics. Here's a quick list of them if you want to get really up to speed: Session 17, A Behavioral Economics Primer, Derek Reed. Session 114, The Behavioral Economics of Toilet Paper, Derek Reed. The aforementioned David Cox episode. Session 11: Obesity, Food Insecurity, Behavioral Economics, and Mindful Eating, Erin Rasmussen. Session 2: Science and Pseudoscience, Steve Lawyer. Back to this show, Matt and I spent a large part of our chat discussing his groundbreaking work in the area of psychedelics. We really get into the weeds, as it were, of how these studies are done, and discuss everything from recruiting participants, the timing of these trips, how participants are supported through their experiences, bad trips, transformative experiences, hypothesized mechanisms of action, what these treatments will look like in five years, and much, much more. And before I forget, here are some links to additional readings that we referenced: MacCorquodale and Meehl (1948). Article on Hypothetical Constructs. Rasmussen and Newland (2009). Quantification of the Anti-Punishment Effect in Humans Using the Generalized Matching Equation. Hopkinspsychedelic.org, a clearing house of all the cool research that's being done at JHU. We close with a fun discussion of the concept of impulsivity. In Matt's view, as a psychological construct, the term isn't very useful, and we get into how he came to that conclusion. This episode is brought to you by: HRIC Recruiting. Barb Voss has been placing BCBAs in permanent positions throughout the US for just about a decade, and has been in the business more generally for 30 years. Like Batman, she works alone, which means that when you work with HRIC, you work directly with Barb and get highly personalized service. So if you're about to graduate, you're looking for a change of pace, or you just want to know if the grass really is greener on the other side, head over to HRIColorado.com to schedule a confidential chat right away. Behavior University. Their mission is to provide university quality professional development for the busy Behavior Analyst. Learn about their CEU offerings and podcast-specific discounts over at behavioruniversity.com/observations. Lastly, I’d like to mention something I don’t bring up all that frequently. I have a membership program for the podcast; think of it as a DIY Patreon… It’s been running for a few years now, and it costs the princely sum of $9/month. Members get access to a private FB group in which they are able to get nearly instantaneous access to the videos of these podcast interviews. The best part is that members get the raw feed. That means no ads, and none of the introductory comments. You just get right to the interview. Another cool thing we do is hold Zoom Hangouts with former guests. We do this about 6 times a year, and it works like this: we schedule a Zoom call, a former guest comes on and joins us, and the members have the opportunity to ask them questions directly.
In this episode of the Bat-Friends Podcast Chris and the World Champion Joe watch Episode 58 of Batman the Animated Series titled Shadow of the Bat Pt 2.https://batfriends.bandcamp.com/releasesFind Joe @CthulhuHolmes on Twitter or at http://joepanc.com/Find Chris @fortresschris on twitter or @fortressnewschris on instagramChrisRundt.comfortressofcomicnews.comhttps://joepanc.threadless.com/collections/bat-friends/Show your support and get exclusive perks on Patreon at patreon.com/fortressofcomicnews
No idea wMr O is not here, he got out like totally John Wick sticks it to the man all kgb in the usa --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/sounderground/message
Bob Saget is here for you. Truly. Which is why he’s started this podcast. In this very first episode, Bob is coming to you live from his personal bunker, where he’ll be free associating about everything from a conversation he once had with John Oliver about their love for strange animals, to what’s more difficult: the SAT’s or the Coronavirus. But in all seriousness, Bob’s here to provide a little levity, laughter, and encouragement as we’re allsocial distancing in our own bunkers. Leave a message for Bob! (562) 600-0343 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Almost from the outset of the podcast, people have been asking me to get Steve Ward on the show. If you're not familiar with Steve, he is the co-founder of Whole Child Consulting, and co-author of The Inventory of Good Learner Repertoires (amongst many other books). In this episode, Steve and I talk about his paper that discusses the role of humor in behavioral interventions. We also talk about his concept of "task as reinforcer," and then digress into helping kids who present with oppositional repertoires. We discussed a ton of resources, and I have done my best to capture them below. If you like the kind of approach that Steve offers, he is conducting a webinar that's hosted by The Applied Behavior Analysis Center on June 16th, 2020. ABAC is offering a 20% discount on this event as well as others to podcast listeners. If you're interested in checking this out, go to abacnj.com and use the code ABACBO20 at check out. With a few exceptions, this discount is available for most of the ABAC webinars, so hit the show notes for more details. Steve's ABAC webinar. The Inventory of Good Learner Repertoires. Teaching Good Learner Repertoires. Teaching Advanced Learner Repertoires. What You Need to Know About Motivation and Teaching Games: An In-Depth Analysis. Another 21 Games: This Time, It's Personal. Task-as-reinforcer BAP paper. Using Humor paper. An Operant Analysis of Joint Attention (Holth, 2005). Today's show is brought to you with the generous support of: HRIC Recruiting. Barb Voss has been placing BCBAs in permanent positions throughout the US for just about a decade, and has been in the business more generally for 30 years. Like Batman, she works alone, which means that when you work with HRIC, you work directly with Barb and get highly personalized service. So if you're about to graduate, you're looking for a change of pace, or you just want to know if the grass really is greener on the other side, head over to HRIColorado.com to schedule a confidential chat right away. The Behavior Analysis Student Association from Florida Tech. In somewhat of a role-reversal, Behavioral Observations is sponsoring their annual student conference, which is taking place on April 17th, in sunny Melbourne, FL. This event will feature presentations from people such as Drs. Sarah Bloom and Tim Vollmer. It's good for 5 CEU's and both on and off site registration options are available. This is a student fundraiser, so no promo codes but don't worry, the early-bird registration price is absurdly cheap! For more information, go to FIT.edu/continuing-education. On April 20th, Hillcrest Educational Centers is hosting Dr. Greg Hanley for a full day workshop in Pittsfield, MA. The event is titled, "How to provide happy, relaxed and engaged treatment." Attendees will earn 7 CE's. Save on your registration by using the promo code YEARN.
Crocs are totally still a thing and we have the chicken-scented Jibbitz to prove it. Then Jordan knocks all our crocs off with a sultry delivery.
It's the last part of our DC Comics Adventures game! The last bit was a little short, so I threw in the few outtakes we had at the very end for you to enjoy. Come back next time as we start our newest D&D 5th edition campaign: Descent into Avernus!
It’s the last part of our DC Comics Adventures game! The last bit was a little short, so I threw in the few outtakes we had at the very end for you to enjoy. Come back next time as we start our newest D&D 5th edition campaign: Descent into Avernus!
Danny Field is a comedian and cancer survivor. We talk about why you shouldn't eat at Wetherspoons, the New Zealand comedy circuit versus the UK one, and Only Fools and Horses. FOLLOW DANNY: INSTA: @dannyfunnyfield TWITTER: @dannyfunnyfield
Danny Field is a comedian and cancer survivor. We talk about why you shouldn't eat at Wetherspoons, the New Zealand comedy circuit versus the UK one, and Only Fools and Horses. FOLLOW DANNY: INSTA: @dannyfunnyfield TWITTER: @dannyfunnyfield
Like Batman and Batman's friend, JD and Peterson are a duo today...although Jenna joins us for our first ever radio play - A Murder in Stardew Valley. We talk Cyberpunk delay, Playstation and E3, Joe Biden, Outer Worlds, Unraveled 2, Luigi's Mansion 3, and Wreckfest. We answer a listener question and Peterson reviews Braverz...kind of...
Like Batman and Batman's friend, JD and Peterson are a duo today...although Jenna joins us for our first ever radio play - A Murder in Stardew Valley. We talk Cyberpunk delay, Playstation and E3, Joe Biden, Outer Worlds, Unraveled 2, Luigi's Mansion 3, and Wreckfest. We answer a listener question and Peterson reviews Braverz...kind of...
1 John 4:8 KJV “He that loveth not, knoweth not God; for God is love.” By Tris No H In the movies Superman is the most powerful hero. Able to fly, able to stop a moving train, faster than a speeding bullet. But Batman a mere mortal of a man easily defeats him. If you notice Batman is always at peace in total control of his emotions. He also always carries with him an even greater super-power, no nephew not his money! Lol He carries a little piece of Kryptonite. As strong as Superman is he cannot stand up in the light of Kryptonite. It literally brings him to his knees, And Batman always has some Kryptonite around his waist. Love to the enemy is like Kryptonite to Superman. Love brings evil to its knees. Love stops demons in their tracks. Love freezes out hatred, overcomes violence. Love burns right through ignorance like a hot knife through butter. And God is love. Our seed for today is “He that loveth not, knoweth not God; for God is love.” 1 John 4:8 KJV Love is your Kryptonite in all matters. Why do you think the enemy tries so hard to keep you away from God? Because God is love! Think about it.... has the enemy every told you well just love him anyway? When someone cut you off in traffic, or uses your personal mug at the office, Steps on your shoe? No, the enemy is quick to whisper, “call her a stinky witch” or punch that guy dead in his throat for stepping on your Nikes. How dare he use the mug with your name on it, that your mama gave you for Christmas! The full-time objective of the enemy is to keep you so off balance with so much anger, jealousy, pride, greed and ignorance that you forget to use your superpower. Love is your Kryptonite and love is the strongest force in the universe. You want to shut the enemy down? Kill all his whispering? Pull out your Kryptonite and apply some love to every situation. Forgive the unforgivable. Gently ask them to rinse out your mug, and put it on your desk when they finish, and Remain at peace. When you are at peace you are in the posture of love. This is Tris no h reminding you that there will be days when evil will try and come for you, knocking at your front door. Don't even let them in. They may try and do all that they can to keep you off balance and upset...trying to steal your peace. But you not even bothered nephew because just like Batman you too have some Kryptonite, and it's called love. And dag nab it you ain't scared to use it. Peace
As a man, it's important to admit that you have a dark side to you. We all do. This isn't a knock on men for having this. What we want to let men know is that, yes, you have Dark Energy within you and once you acknowledge that, you can take ownership of it and utilize it as a way to advance your cause. Like Batman, who never kills anyone, even his enemies. We discuss that every man has a well within that they can stuff the angst down into. Some men have a deep well and others it can be very shallow. This can lead to gaining development and understanding of this energy at different times in your life. Sometimes it builds up and you have raging energy like the Hulk and you are always angry and easily triggered. Again, acknowledging the dark energy within and the level it's at is only going to help strengthen you as a man and better deal with the tough situations that arise. #boyswillbeboys features a real live Pet Detective in Shanghai that helps reunite pets with their owners. https://www.breakingasia.com/news/shanghais-pet-detective-reunited-thousands-of-beloved-pets-with-owners/
Ron starts this episode talks about how fixing cars is like being Batman, with a story on a last minute fix : takes a call on a 98 Mercury Sable asking for the weak points on this vehicle : takes a call on a 99 Sentra and 05 Sentra and a question on scan tools : interviews Jim McIlvane, eCare Manager of Optima Batteries, Inc regarding battery topics : takes a call on a 97 Camry with an 01 Engine and an idle air sensor code. Learn more about your ad-choices at https://news.iheart.com/podcast-advertisers
Brandon tries to make Jeff like "Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice," the 2016 film that Brandon happens to be in (for two seconds). Jeff talks abut how YouTube TV's unlimited DVR has changed his viewing habits, what qualifies as "fifth meal," and Brandon shares how Ben Affleck helped him be a happier person. The Make Me Like This theme song is called "Thinking About You" by The Gemini; look for it on iTunes, Spotify and Google Play. If you like this podcast, give us a follow at twitter.com/makemelikethis.
Long before Disney, Thanos and billion dollar movies there was just RDJ, a suit of armour and the quote, “I am Iron Man.” “Like Batman, but with better mental health and more green smoothies.” That’s what Nathan thinks he knows about this one, so come and join the Nerds for another bank holiday outing in the MCU as we find out how close he actually was!.
We're back and this episode we are joined but the infamous Rob. Nintendo Spring Direct: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wUnpK23g4FY Google Stadia: https://www.cnet.com/news/google-stadia-gaming-at-gdc-2019-everything-just-announced/ Brian: https://twitter.com/Does_Machines AJ: https://twitter.com/elvernthehero Rob: https://www.instagram.com/robwashere_lol/?hl=en
“Stay true to yourself, yet always be open to learn. Work hard, and never give up on your dreams, even when nobody else believes they can come true but you. These are not cliches but real tools you need no matter what you do in life to stay focused on your path.” – Phillip Sweet After watching Jack Ryan with my wife, the Amazon series based on a Tom Clancy character, we checked out a short documentary series featuring former operators and analysts who worked with the CIA – and that's where I first saw our guest Nic McKinley, the founder and CEO of DeliverFund and the man who inspired the hashtag #TheRealJackRyan. When Nic was growing up, he wanted to be Batman; “Just a normal guy who used his resources to change the world, and worked really hard to build himself up to be the catalyst that would change the world.” And Nic pretty much got as close to being Batman as anyone gets: CIA special agent. He served as a member of a special unit focused on providing unique capabilities and expertise, regardless of threat or environment, in response to the critical operational needs of the Intelligence Community as part of an overseas unit conducting complex operations in non-permissive countries. Like Batman, Nic did start with some privilege. He didn't have the entire fortune of Wayne Enterprises behind him, but he didn't need it. He says, “The ultimate privilege is good parenting – and I had really good parents.” Nic was also a USAF Pararescueman (PJ) for 10 years, but exceptional dedication in the military alone isn't what got him recruited into the CIA (although it didn't hurt). He later worked as a consultant for fortune 10 investment banks, where he demonstrated a penchant for finding solutions to hard problems, and these diverse experiences are what made him so appealing for high-stakes operations in high threat countries. But this isn't even the most awesome impact that Nic has made to protect our country and world. After being exposed to the human trafficking epidemic that is still very alive today, Nic was moved to found DeliverFund, an organization that equips, trains, and advises law enforcement around the world on how they can arrest human traffickers. Together with law enforcement, they work to counter human trafficking, eliminate this horrible market, and really save lives. You can help their mission by going to https://deliverfund.org/donate. -- Resources: Learn more at https://www.deliverfund.org/ (https://www.deliverfund.org/) Donate to DeliverFund: https://deliverfund.org/donate Connect with Nic: Facebook | LinkedIn -- We are brought to you by the Lawton Marketing Group, a full-service advertising and design agency serving companies and entrepreneurs at all levels. They are your one-stop shop for all your website, logo, social media, print, app design and reputable management needs. Visit LawtonMG.com for more info. -- The Impact Entrepreneur Show is produced by Podcast Masters
Like Batman and Robin and peanut butter and jelly, David Congdon and David Roberts are the dynamic duo your life needs. In this first part of a two-part episode, we all talk about what the church post-emergent looks like. Guests Info/Bio: David Congdon is an author, speaker, and scholar working in the area of theology and culture. He hails originally from Portland, Oregon, completed a B.A. in English at Wheaton College, acquired an M.Div. and Ph.D. in theology from Princeton Theological Seminary, and has since worked in the publishing industry as an academic editor. Find David Congdon here: dwcongdon.com Twitter: @dwcongdon David Roberts is the youth pastor at Watershed, a progressive non-denominational church in Charlotte, NC. He is also a student at Fuller Theological Seminary. Find David Roberts here: davidmrobertsblog.wordpress.com Twitter: @DRob87 Special music by Ellie Schmidly: ellieschmidly.com Twitter: @ellieschmidly Instagram: @ellieschmidly Spotify: Ellie Schmidly Get connected to Mason: masonmennenga.com Patreon: patreon.com/masonmennenga Twitter: @masonmennenga Facebook: facebook.com/mason.mennenga Instagram: masonmennenga
The narrator's continued petty use of magic seems to be taking a toll on those around him, but as is the nature of hubris he is ignorant of the dangers. The question isn't will he fall but how much longer until he does?
Batman has no superpowers and frequently gets his butt kicked. But Batman is fearless, persistent and built like iron. This is what we need to aspire to be, instead of imagining you're going to be like Superman.... Life will frequently treat you like Bane did Batman, but we have to be resilient, and keep fighting. No matter what.
The guys talk about the important things. Like Batman's penis, Henry Cavill's potential as Batman, and our pick for Vesemir in the Witcher. #BillyCrystal4Vesemir --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app
What could you possibly learn from Batman at work? Ryan looks at how seeing yourself as a super hero could impact the way you view your work environment!
Amy Shark, in the middle of a sold out Aussie tour, reveals secrets about her early song-writing days… See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.
Like Batman, Christopher Ategeka witnessed the death of both his parents as a child. He grew up with immense hardships but managed to navigate - an experience that left him equipped with valuable life skills. The talent he now uses to tackle the worlds toughest problems. He is a serial entrepreneur in Silicon Valley, an engineer and a pioneer in the unintended consequences of technologies ("UCOT") movement. He is the founder and Managing Director at LyfBase, the world's first center for the unintended consequences of technology. Ategeka coined and popularized the term "UCOT" (unintended consequences of technology) in the tech sector and the concept of "UCOT" evangelism. Before that, he founded Health Access Corps, a non-profit that works to establish sustainable health care systems on the African continent. Before that, he founded Hourglass ventures a fund that supports visionary entrepreneurs who come from an underpriviledged background-who need a Friends and Family round financing. He has been invited to speak at the Clinton Global Initiative and United Nations, and he's won many international awards for his work; he was named a 2016 World Economic Forum Young Global Leader and a 2017 TED Fellow. His work has been featured in many major media publications both locally and internationally such as BBC, Forbes, and NPR. He holds a Bachelor’s of Science, and Master’s of Science in Mechanical Engineering from the University of California, Berkeley. http://www.christopherategeka.com/
Sales & Marketing is like peanut butter and jelly. Like Batman and Robin. You need to work together to drive more revenue.
Ben & Giles return to the Cumulus Studios to pregame Sunday's big Vikings game! Topics include: -Ryan Suter is bad at brekaways. -Are the Wild a stale product? -Big wins over Chicago and Winnipeg. -The Year of Matt Dumba is alive and well. -Eric Staal is an All-Star. -The preseason over/under predictions are reviewed. -Thoughts on the bye week. -Bruce Boudreau's quote of the week. -A Minnesota Vikings wager. -The GatG mailbag is opened. -2018 NHL ASG & Tampa Bay Lightning jerseys are reviewed.
From writing Nancy Drew fan fiction, to starting her own photography business before the age of 21, Kailyn Julianna has always found a way to follow her joy! Listen in to this week's Podcast Episode W/ Photographer Kailyn Julianna! We talk taking your art seriously (Like Batman!), and following your joy, even when you feel afraid. This episode is Sponsored by The Dream Shop. Visit the shop here: https://dreamersthatdo.com/ Use Coupon Code DREAMDOER10 for 10% Off of final purchase. Visit Kailyn's Photography Website: http://www.kailynjulianna.com/ Follow Kailyn on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/kailynjulianna/ Watch Kailyn's YouTube Videos: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b3I3nCM4GuQ
Rob Needs an Alfred with Brooke Brown We put our ghostwriter in the hot seat. Brooke Brown of Well Read Well Said is responsible for the detailed show notes you all love so much. But today she joins us on the mic to discuss how men get ready for parties with pretty ladies, our picks for song of the summer, fast women, being finessed as young boys, and why you need to get you an Alfred that can do both. Listen in as we discuss: The Man with a party plan (10:33) Song of the Summer 2017 (22:30) Our ghostwriter, Brooke drops in (29:06) Aye Rob, listen bruh…(39:15) All men have been finessed (52:00) Mentioned in this Episode: Jimmy Iovine on SZA/Top Dawg Deal Rake It Up – Yo Gotti ft Nicki Minaj Who Dat Boy – Tyler, The Creator Magnolia – Playboi Carti Claudio Rivera's Episode Ron of Japan Chicago Quotes from this Episode: “There was no ashy-ness in the building. Everybody was well moisturized.” ~ Dion “I think we have to acknowledge the elephant in the room. She's fast! That's just a fast woman.” ~ Fresh “I just feel like everybody needs an Alfred in their life. Like Batman has Alfred.”~ Ant P “Rob didn't know how to protect his new money. He still doesn't. It's evident by his timing.” ~Brooke Events of the Week Thank You Chicago's Everyday We Lit Day Party: July 15th 4-9pm at Bar 10 Pitchfork Music Festival: July 14- 16th at Chicago's Union Park Find out more about our go-to writer, Brooke Brown and her professional writing services at www.wellread-wellsaid.com, @wellsaidbrooke on Twitter and @whatbrookesaw on Instagram. To gain access to Dion's All Summer 17 Spotify Playlist and get updates on summer events like and follow us on Facebook.
Throughout the history of the NBA, great championship teams and Hall of Famers have been exemplified by dynamic duos. In fact, it’s difficult to find a championship team that didn’t have a great duo, whether it be two Hall of Famers, or a superstar with a perfect complement. Like Batman needs Robin, so too did Magic need Kareem, Michael needed Scottie, Malone needed Stockton and more recently Steph needs KD. Join @Lock_THA_GREAT and @JaiHov TONIGHT as they discuss the hottest sports news of the past week and analyze the NBA's Top Duo's since 1996.
The Batman v Superman fight has come to its conclusion as Batman races off to save Martha. If Batman has seen the light, do we see any change in his character? The warehouse fight scene doesn't seem to hold any clues to Batman's transformation because this is the most brutal superhero fight scene we've ever witnessed in a film. Batman takes out two dozen henchman to save Superman's mother. We also get our first glimpse at Superman's ultimate foe, Doomsday. --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app
James tells us why we were wrong to like Batman Vs Superman, plus Monster Kill and Adderal Diaries. With your hosts Tom Seymour, Ken Powell, James Richardson and Dave Leute. Here is the link to check out Troma Now!!! iTunes Twitter Google App! Stitcher Radio Facebook Youtube
Superman in the DC Cinematic Universe is NOT the Superman Will wants to see, the PC Master Race continues to be a very vocal and irate bunch, and Valve leaked some Half Life 3 stuff kinda sorta maybe. All this and more on your CONSOLE Gaming, Entertainment & Nerd Culture Live Podcast
Personal Branding: Ever wonder who would win in a battle Batman or Superman? Well in the marketing battle it would be Batman hands down, and heres why… As a kid did you ever think wouldn't it be cool if I could be Batman? Well good news is you can be, because Batman is just a normal guy who you can relate to because if you have the right tools you can accomplish everything he has. You want to be relatable to your customers, they want to know they can achieve what you have, learn how in this podcast.
Chris Shandrow Part 2 of Falling Empire, a Compass message series
And now we arrive at the end, "Felina". I had such an awesome time at our Breaking Bad finale party, that it didn't even sink in until my private rewatchings at home how bittersweet it was. Walt falling dead in the arms of his lover; science, chemistry, even meth, after having finally provided for his family, made peace with his wife, and freed his partner... it was pretty intense. A lot of people, critics and fans, have quibbles about the pacing, the plot, the neatness of it all, but to me, it was a love letter from Vince to us. Like Batman to Gotham city, "Felina" perhaps wasn't the ending that Walt, and by extension, us, deserved. But it was the ending that we needed.
Commentary: Trek Stars: The Work of Star Trek Creators Outside of Star Trek
Meyer Part 6: Confessions of a Homing Pigeon. After a string of successful mystery and adventure books, Nicholas Meyer chose to tell a more personal story for his fifth novel, Confessions of a Homing Pigeon. The book is an autobiographical coming of age tale about George Bernini, an American boy who is sent to France to live with his alcoholic Uncle Fritz after his parents are killed in a trapeze accident. This week, Mike and Max discuss the personal nature of the novel and how it deals with universal themes of adolescence, the reasons why Meyer felt compelled to tell this story, the similarities to Catcher in the Rye, how the book works as a road story, how this novel’s style differs from Meyer’s other novels, whether or not the book suffers from “The Dawson’s Creek Syndrome,” why the 14-year-old protagonist reminds Mike of Roy Scheider, what makes this book Meyer’s Driving Miss Daisy, and how the book is essentially the story of Robin the Boy Wonder gone wrong.
Cathy and Todd discuss the role of anger plays for themselves and their children.
Cathy and Todd discuss the role of anger plays for themselves and their children.