Podcasts about soulshaping

How can we shape our souls well? Is it possible to be unproductive in the world's eyes while being truly productive for the Kingdom of God? This week, we're discussing the balance between being lazy and being still, and how sometimes the simplest things can shape our souls spiritually in ways we could never have imagined! Let's get into it! LINKS... Head on over to our YouTube Channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCe3fLjQP_lchFvLhcS5pohg Check out our blog here: https://thefew.blog/ Do daily life with us on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thefew.blog/ Hope Beauty (use our code THEFEW to get 10% off your order): https://www.hopebeautyusa.com/  Find our Christian Resources Page HERE: https://thefew.blog/resources/  Listen and like our NEW Spotify Worship Playlist here: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/4oWFSPV8NuxwD7yscL2mZO?si=eZmKLjZVSEWrGWo0p4w7IQ  Podbean Affiliate Link: https://www.podbean.com/thefew Our link gets you one month FREE of Podcasting with Podbean! :) Have a topic or question on your mind you'd like us to chat about or answer in a future episode? Email us your thoughts and/or questions @ thefew.blog@gmail.com!

Jeff Brown, author of Soulshaping, discusses his new book Humanifestations: On Trauma, Truth, and Transformation. Jeff Brown is the author of 8 popular books: Soulshaping, Ascending with Both Feet on the Ground, Love It Forward, An Uncommon Bond, Spiritual Graffiti, Grounded Spirituality, Hearticulations, and Humanifestations. He is the producer of the award-winning spiritual documentary Karmageddon, which features Ram Dass, Seane Corn, Deva Premal and Miten. Jeff's short writings have touched millions of souls worldwide and have been shared on social media by the likes of LeAnn Rimes, Alanis Morrissette, Fergie, Chrissy Metz, Jason Silva, and Amanda De Cadenet. Jeff is the founder of Soulshaping Institute and Enrealment Press. He lives in Canada with his wife, poet Susan Frybort.

Soul Shaping | March 12, 2023Brian Van Eps | Guest Speaker A question worth reflecting on: What is shaping your life the most right now? Another Question: Who is shaping your soul the most right now? “I am the true vine, and my Father is the gardener. He cuts off every branch in me that bears no fruit, while every branch that does bear fruit he prunes so that it will be even more fruitful. You are already clean because of the word I have spoken to you. Remain in me, as I also remain in you. No branch can bear fruit by itself; it must remain in the vine. Neither can you bear fruit unless you remain in me. I am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing. If you do not remain in me, you are like a branch that is thrown away and withers; such branches are picked up, thrown into the fire and burned. If you remain in me and my words remain in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be done for you. This is to my Father’s glory, that you bear much fruit, showing yourselves to be my disciples.” John 15:1-8 (NIV) The First Step in Soul Shaping: Pruning “I am the true vine, and my Father is the gardener. He cuts off every branch in me that bears no fruit, while every branch that does bear fruit he prunes so that it will be even more fruitful.“ John 15:1-2 (NIV) The Second Step in Shaping: Connection to the Vine “I am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing.” John 15:5 (NIV) Another way of asking this: What are you plugged in to? Three Fake Vines: 1. Me 2. Toxic Voices 3. A Noisy World The Result: Bear Fruit How do I live this out? Reflection Questions:1) What is shaping your life the most right now? 2) Who is shaping your life? 3) Where have you been pruned by God in this life? 4) Who are you most connected to? 5) What “Fake Vines” are you connected to the most? 6) Where have you seen fruit from God in your life? 7) How will you live this out today? Next Steps: Complete the Connect Card to receive more information, have us pray for you, or to ask us any question: http://journeyweb.net/connectcard Want to worship through giving and support the ministry of Journey Church: https://journeyweb.net/giveDownload our app: https://journeyweb.net/app Join our Facebook Group to stay connected throughout the week: https://facebook.com/groups/JourneyChurchBozemanGet your children connected to our children's ministry, Base Camp: https://journeyweb.net/childrenOur Student Ministry is for High School and Middle School students: https://journeyweb.net/studentsSubscribe to our YouTube Channel: https://www.youtube.com/c/JourneyChurchBozemanNotes Page: https://journeyweb.net/sermons/notes/2023.03.12.pdf

In this riveting follow-up conversation, Jeff speaks with IFS founder Richard Schwartz. In this dialogue, they go deeper into the meaningful distinction between a notion of unity consciousness (and non-duality) that is dissociated from the self, and one that we arrive at organically, as a result of doing the work to heal, honor and integrate the core self. And they explore the relationship between the soul and the self, our guides and our encoded directionality, the meaningful distinction between couples that belong together (soulmates) and couples that perhaps don't (woundmates). Links and Resources:Grounded Spirituality… https://www.amazon.com/Grounded-Spirituality-Jeff-Brown/dp/1988648033/Soulshaping… https://jeffbrown.co/soulshaping-a-journey-of-self-creation/Jeff Brown's website and healing courses… https://jeffbrown.co/courses/Richard's new website... https://ifs-institute.com/Richard's newest book... https://www.amazon.com/No-Bad-Parts-Restoring-Wholeness/dp/1683646681/Trevor Hall's website… https://www.trevorhallmusic.com/Trevor Hall's album, ‘The Fruitful Darkness'… https://open.spotify.com/album/4ahv1YI2hpYOtXZsTIqYyG

Have you ever wondered what your calling is? If so, this is a conversation for you! Have you ever felt the pain of not knowing what your purpose is and longing and wanting to know it so bad that it almost hurts? Jeff Brown calls it a truth ache and in this conversation we cover his own journey of discovering his sacred purpose, the different exits he took and the practices that helped him along the way. From trial lawyer to acclaimed author of deeply soul touching books, such as Soulshaping and Grounded Spirituality, just to name a few, Jeff's journey has been unique and definitely not an easy one. The way he connects the steps that he took and tells his story will help you to connect the dots for yourself and I'm sure you'll have many AHAs! We're talking about the importance of inner work, healing the past, not avoiding your emotions and the commitment it takes to develop a relationship with the self in order to be able to identify your path and see it through. And all of these steps will lead you to crossing the bridge to your authentic self. This conversation will touch your heart and resonate with your soul - so take a listen, share it with someone you know! Check out Jeff's books and also all of his soul moving and deeply impactful work at www.jeffbrown.co and connect with him on IG www.instagram.com/jeffbrownsoulshaping

Inner Journey welcomes Jeff Brown. A former criminal lawyer and psychotherapist, Jeff Brown is the author of 7 popular books: Soulshaping, Ascending with Both Feet on the Ground, Love It Forward, An Uncommon Bond, Spiritual Graffiti, Grounded Spirituality, and Hearticulations. He is also the producer and primary journeyer in the award-winning spiritual documentary, ‘Karmageddon,' which also stars Ram Dass, Seane Corn and Deva Premal.

@jeffbrownsoulshaping@michaeltrainerhttp://www.peakmind.orghttp://www.jeffbrown.co 

Exploring the Human Right and Calling to Re-Inhabit Our Bodies. This week Lisa and Joshua cover how embodiment relates to wild love. Links mentioned in this episode: Jeff Brown Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/SOULSHAPING/posts/10158406557585982?__xts__[0]=68.ARDWSWMu78bn0gT96V9ki1FHq-KsiIazJ6V2jQvsxXtaT_DNde_rLTA-pz6eLpQQmAJGY0l8xjQI5832CP6tu6fzj9t0_tSvLAEjLsogb42IV8HG2XnmiQ3kPawrEbDQ_9xvLiAUVnj4VN0YYuglbGAX8qgge6uupbMnrs1HnFnsqtEiLNJONjibR--Ye-z5zEYGzzxuiS5Uf3nbX7oO3d9HxD0TUHQD-xRZodMLiTNFoofk_aLtsC4mlVhxtUYl5_eXSTuu_xLHX6YuGeLHhjchmk_krZwIVACGuGZk7610q8aCseu6Nh5xiRsBqAwGv3O_8U-d_zSt7G-KkvTAj6i4Ta9SdLCxll6R2JoPLfAAX6K8abQWiLclp1bWlJcPl_7ngqb6WZRQ8unnRaW3PUZPfZfVKrx2gqu3MYaReC_QetfwqjDUvyV5o7uODw1C_ZpORpvNr74rpSDbDLYmuKVyUbwXKIShRyvpGptdbojLn3UVoypp 5 Rythms with Chantell Foss: https://www.chantellfoss.com/ Vipassana Meditation: https://www.dhamma.org/en/about/vipassana Holotropic Breathwork: https://holotropic.ca/ This podcast is hosted by ZenCast.fm

Who are you choosing to be in 2021? With the new year upon us, Jenn and Leah discuss their intentions for the year and how important it is to be deliberate about the type of person you want and choose to be. In true Deep Chats fashion, Jenn and Leah get vulnerable about their own lives, the lessons they learned in 2020, and who they are choosing to be throughout this year ahead. In this episode we discussed:  Intentions vs. Resolutions The importance of choice Expansion Integration Fully expressing ourselves as human beings Creating the “and” instead of the “or” Taking ownership in your life What readiness means and living “as if” Valuing your time means valuing your life   Resources: You Can Heal Your Life by Louise Hay - The Body Keeps the Score by Bessel van der Kolk  Soul Shaping by Jeff Brown The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fuck by Mark Manson High Performance Habits by  Brendon Burchard   Stay in Touch:  Website Instagram @deepchatspodcast  Watch our interviews recorded live on YouTube   About Leah & Jenn Leah Morris is a Life & Relationship Transition Coach, founder of Life Remade, published writer, and motivational speaker... She helps people to authentically process their feelings, thoughts, and emotions in order to give them a deeper understanding of themselves and others. Using a range of modalities including art, coaching,  guided visualization, and even her own story and experience of marriage, divorce, and finding herself again - Leah specializes in helping you gain a solid sense of Self Worth, develop unshakable Confidence, and heal after emotional Heartbreak. The biggest lesson she's learned in life thus far is that "there is no greater place to begin putting your life together than when it's been broken apart. Connect with Leah at www.LifeRemade.com or on Instagram @leahemorris   Jennifer Butler is a Love and Transformation Coach who is dedicated to helping women fall deeply in love with themselves and awaken to their own internal power to create joy, love, and freedom in their lives. Working with women in three areas: Conscious Uncoupling, Calling in “The One,” & Self-Discovery, Jennifer teaches clients to identify and transform internal obstacles and expand their capacity to love and be loved. Jennifer received her Masters in Clinical Social Work from New York University in 2002. After working as a trauma social worker in the hospital system, she took time off to become a mom and write a book. Jennifer authored Excerpts from the Heart of a Mom, inviting readers into her personal life and parenting journey, and sharing fundamental insights to a conscious approach to parenting. She also began “Live Through the Heart,” a blog that inspires readers to live more consciously in their daily lives. Connect with Jennifer at www.jennjoycoaching.com or on Instagram @jennjoybutler_lifecoach Subscribe + Review Never miss an episode! Subscribe to the podcast!

After turning to faith in Jesus Christ at age 16 through Young Life in Washington, D.C., I eventually left my modeling career to study the Bible and fulfill God’s purpose in my life. Risking the approval of my beloved father, I set out on a journey in obedience to God’s call. I attend the Christian college that my father forbade and marry the spiritually-minded man my father reluctantly allowed. Even when we were at odds, we remained respectful and devoted to each other. My testimony is the true story of my passionate prayer for my father to find Christ so he would one day spend eternity with me. My father, Harry S. Dent, Sr., was a powerful, political strategist, who worked for President Nixon and narrowly escaped Watergate. He entered politics to save the world and protect the freedoms of his country. He served a Senator and three Presidents and helped to build the Republican Party in the South. In the early years, he attempted to manipulate me into his success syndrome. Deep inside my father feared his princess would one day become a missionary. In the end God used it all for His glory. He not only answered my simple prayer of salvation and God’s purpose for my dad’s life, but went far beyond what my mind could ever imagine. Through God’s grace, we team up in ministry together and my dad becomes what he so desperately feared: a missionary. His full time ministry takes him to Romania where he assists the underground churches and a country emerge to new found freedom following 40 years of communism. My path would take me to the darkest corners of the Middle East where there was no freedom. The poetic justice in my story proves God’s faithfulness and His marvelous sense of humor. My testimony will motivate anyone who has a loved one they want to see in heaven to pray without ceasing and realize they may be the only Jesus their loved one sees. Throughout our lives and times, my dad and I experienced different kinds of freedom. Ultimately, we find true freedom together-the freedom that lasts forever. Ginny Dent Brant graduated with a B.A. from Columbia International University, and holds two Masters Degrees from the University of South Carolina in Elementary Education and Elementary Counseling. With 28 years of experience in public education as a teacher, counselor, and adjunct professor, she currently serves as a counselor at Orchard Park Elementary School. Ginny served as a trustee of the International Mission Board of the Southern Baptist Convention and has held leadership roles in many Baptist churches. Ginny has done mission work in Gaza, Yemen, the Czech Republic, Romania, and China. She is a soloist, Bible teacher and Christian speaker. She is the President of Laity Alive and Serving which her father, Harry S. Dent, started in 1985. Her husband, Dr. Alton Brant, is an associate professor of American Sign Language and Deaf Studies at Clemson University. The Brants have one married son, Joshua (and wife Sydney) and twin sons, Jonathan and Harrison. She is the daughter of Harry and Betty Dent. Ginny was a contributing author for The Chosen Path: 365 Inspirational Messages, Love is a Flame, Chicken Soup for the Soul: Shaping the New You, and online with Christian Devotions. She also contributes articles to The Baptist Courier in South Carolina.

Vanessa is the founder of ‘The Limitless Potential Academy’, where growth-seekers come to get the support and experience they need to breakthrough to their next level of potential with Monthly Masterclasses and Group Coaching. Vanessa also runs the 'Limitless Potential' show where she interviews the world's leading authorities in personal development, human behavior and human potential. She also founded the Limitless Potential Inner Circle Community of 5,000+ like-minded, outstanding human beings from 30+ countries across the globe whom support and challenge each other to reach ever increasing levels of their potential daily.Vanessa describes her journey which started by her brother choosing the degree she chose at University because she wasn't aware of what she wanted to do with her life or what her purpose was. This is a common challenge as we are not taught to think for ourselves, we live to please our parents and follow what they want for us, which is usually the "safe" route!After completing her business degree Vanessa still didn't feel good about what she was doing and went into banking but this still didn't fulfill her. She went back to university and started a Law degree because she thought that would open up more doors. She still wasn't happy and it was at this point that her then boyfriend introduced her to the teachings of Tony Robins and this became the turning point for Vanessa.At 24 years old Vanessa was under the impression that she was too old to change (I know right?!?) when she saw a 65 year old attendee of the Tony Robins conference stand up with tears of happiness in her eyes as she exclaimed how she just realized that she had been successful in her career because she felt that is who her father wanted her to be but it had been at the expense of her family life. She now felt free and knew that she could find a life of fulfillment and freedom with her new awareness.Vanessa left Law school, much to the dismay of her family who disconnected from her, claiming Vanessa Jane was a failure! The easy route is very often the most difficult in the long run so find your purpose and follow your heart.Over the last 7 years Vanessa Jane has invested a lot of time and money in her own personal growth and is now sharing these messages with other people to help them live out their potential, which is limitless.Vanessa Jane's advice for her teenage self would be: "listen to yourself and do what you want to do." When you do something with a passion it will be more fulfilling.Question: Who did you crave love from the most when you were growing up?As teenagers we need options with regards to what we can do and encouragement to think for ourselves and pursue our passion. Parents and teachers have our best interest at heart when they try to protect us as teenagers, but at the same time they are not setting us up for success because we are not thinking for ourselves.Vanessa Jane explains how most people are living a life of mediocrity because they have too much "stuff" that is holding them back. When you get rid of that stuff you can transcend your life into one of meaning and fulfillment. Carl Jung: What you most need is where you least want to look.What are the patterns that repeat in your life? What is tripping you up? 95% of what determines our life comes from our subconscious mind which is the programs from he past. We need to rely more on our feelings and emotions to draw on the wisdom rather than what our head says from he programing of the past.Book suggestion: Soulshaping: A Journey of Self-Creation by Jeff BrownI asked Vanessa Jane how her family react to her success now and she was pleased to say that her Mum is now her number one fan who helps and supports her in the business. Some members do not get it and it is important to understand that not everyone will because personal growth requires a new thinking."When you get clear on what authentically inspires you, you actually become unshakeable to all the things your past self was terrified about." - Vanessa Jane PatrickUnderstand that our families want us to be happy and they are coming from a level of awareness where getting a stable career is the right route. It may be right for some but not for all so raise your level of awareness and be authentic in the direction your choose for your life.** Be on the lookout for an upcoming episode where I am going to break down the Golden Rule and explain why I think it us fundamentally flawed **The best place to follow Vanessa Jane is on her Facebook page via the link below. Final word from Vanessa Jane: Her life changed when she decided to take 100% responsibility for her actions and destiny. Role model that to others and you will have a greater impact on the world.You can contact Vanessa Jane on Facebook, Website, or Instagram.You can connect with me at:Website: www.Chris-J-Baker.comEmail: Chris@Chris-J-Baker.comFacebook: Release Your Unconscious PageFacebook: Leadership Excellence with Chris BakerLinkedIn: Chris BakerInstagram: chris _j_baker_ryuTo purchase my book 10 Steps 2 Freedom from Amazon click here.To purchase my book Organizational Culture and Leadership click here

Believe it or not, you have a sacred purpose. There's a reason for you being on earth right now. In fact, we all have a sacred purpose for our lives. In this episode, I brought on Jeff Brown, an author and Enrealment Activist. Jeff and I discuss the idea of spiritual bypassing and how it differs from having a healthy spirituality. He shares his ideas about what a conscious capitalist society would look like and his thoughts on the future of patriarchal constructs. Jeff talks about his book, Grounded Spirituality. He also talks about how to move toward your sacred purpose and how men and women experience spiritual bypassing differently. About Jeff Brown: A former criminal lawyer and psychotherapist, Jeff Brown is the author of 6 popular books: Soulshaping, Ascending with Both Feet on the Ground, Love It Forward, An Uncommon Bond, Spiritual Graffiti and Grounded Spirituality. He is also the producer and primary journeyer in the award-winning spiritual documentary, Karmageddon, which also stars Ram Dass, Seane Corn, Deva Premal and Miten. After writing a series of inspirations for ABC'S ‘Good Morning America' in 2010, and appearing on Fox News.com and dozens of radio shows, Brown wrote the viral blog ‘Apologies to the Divine Feminine (from a warrior in transition)' that autumn, catapulting him to a greater degree of notoriety, particularly in social media. Jeff's new terms and short writings became a phenomenon some years ago, and continue to be shared by seekers and growers worldwide. In April, 2018, Jeff was invited to Ottawa by Sophie Grégoire Trudeau–gender equality activist and the wife of Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau–to film a conversation about emotional healing and inclusivity. She had been sharing Jeff's words in speeches and social media posts for some time. Excerpts from that powerful dialogue are viewable on Sophie's Facebook and Instagram pages. Jeff is also the founder of Soulshaping Institute and Enrealment Press. Connect with Jeff: Website www.jeffbrown.co Instagram @jeffbrownsoulshaping Facebook @soulshaping What You'll Hear: 2:01 What's going on in Jeff's area with the pandemic 4:30 What spiritual bypassing is and how people use it so avoid the unresolved aspects of human experience 8:27 The movement toward a more authentic, inclusive consciousness 10:17 What a conscious capitalism would look like 13:16 The pushback he's received about his book, Grounded Spirituality 14:47 How Trump is causing more people to use spiritual bypassing 18:21 His thoughts on the unexpressed rage and grief happening right now 19:52 Jeff's experience with how men and women deal with spiritual bypassing 23:20 The difference between spiritual bypassing and healthy spirituality 26:33 How to get in touch with your sacred purpose 29:02 Jeff's definition of “sacred purpose” 33:16 His thoughts on people guiding openings without formalized therapeutic training or degrees 37:13 The problem with bypassing the spiritual world 40:40 The movement away from patriarchal constructs to a divine femine way of being 44:42 His thoughts on why the government wants people to get back to work 47:01 What Jeff wants to see on an individual and small level for people coming out of this pandemic 52:33 Jeff's definition of “uncivilized”

In this Episode: Myriah & Jerry welcome Author, Teacher,Enrealment Activist & Grounded Spiritualist Jeff Brown to the program. They talk about life during Coronavirus Quarantine, enrealment, grounded spirituality, and even thrown in a little football talk too.For more from Jeff, visit his website: JeffBrown.coAnd follow him on Social Media: Facebook & Twitter: @SoulShapingInstagram: @JeffBrownSoulShaping--We've launched a new You Tube Channel! Be sure to find us on youtube (People Doing Good Podcast) and watch our first video with Carson Pforsich of EP29, during his workout at Langermann's Health Club. --To stay up to date with Myriah & Jerry, be sure to subscribe to the podcast and follow People Doing Good on social media: Facebook, Twitter & Instagram: @1GoodPodcastEmail: PeopleDoingGoodPodcast@Gmail.comPeople Doing Good is made possible in part by Shoes4Kidz: www.Shoes4Kidz.comThis Podcast is Produced & Edited by Charlene Goto of  Go-To Productions

I’ve been eyeing Jeff Brown on social media for quite some time now. Each of his poignant pieces would reverberate through me with a powerful ,”Yes, Amen, and Hallelujah!” Jeff has a powerful way of articulating the nuances and intricacies of grounded spirituality and love. His teachings are direct and deep, calling out the BS and painful shortcomings of new age culture and spiritual relationships.  Given my history with spiritual gaslighting and my passion for the realness, I knew Jeff was the perfect first guest for Honey in the Heart!  Jeff covers a lot of ground in this episode, particularly the importance of “Enrealment” in relationship. If you are craving some insights and guidance on how to have a thriving relationship - to yourself, god, and your partner - that includes ALL of yourself (not just the love and light), this is an episode you don’t want to miss!   IN THIS EPISODE WE DISCUSSED:    What the term “Enrealment” means in both intangible and tangible terms. How typical spiritual constructs are based on patriarchal systems and bypassing The danger and dysfunction of “Twin Flames” How gurus can get away with terrible behavior, misconduct, and painful personal lives The importance of being in your physical and emotional body to have a healthy, nontoxic relationships How relationships help us excavate our trauma and past pain Steps to get grounded if you notice you’re dissociated and bypassing in your relationship Why support is essential to understanding how relationships can be a portal to divinity  How yoga is often used for spiritual bypassing and dissociation from the f*cked up humanness The difference between soulmates and woundmates - and why it’s important to tell the difference Qualities essential to have a relationship based on grounded spirituality / enrealment How tantra and sex can be used to escape and disassociate  Why suicides are happening more and more in new age communities What’s required to actually have a grounded love experience Connect with Jeff: Website: https://jeffbrown.co/ Instagram: @jeffbrownsoulshaping Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/SOULSHAPING/   Become an Insider: Sign Up to Receive Monthly Love Letters from Mackenzie https://www.kenzieeason.com/lovelettersignup   Subscribe to the Podcast https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/honey-in-the-heart-relationships-emotions-intimacy/id1291634385   About Jeff Brown: A former criminal lawyer and psychotherapist, Jeff Brown is the author of 6 popular books: Soulshaping, Ascending with Both Feet on the Ground, Love It Forward, An Uncommon Bond, Spiritual Graffiti and Grounded Spirituality. He is also the producer and primary journeyer in the award-winning spiritual documentary, Karmageddon, which also stars Ram Dass, Seane Corn, Deva Premal and Miten. After writing a series of inspirations for ABC’S ‘Good Morning America’ in 2010, and appearing on Fox News.com and dozens of radio shows, Brown wrote the viral blog ‘Apologies to the Divine Feminine (from a warrior in transition)’ that autumn, catapulting him to a greater degree of notoriety, particularly in social media. Jeff’s new terms and short writings became a phenomenon some years ago, and continue to be shared by seekers and growers worldwide. His quotes have been shared in social media by Alanis Morrissette, Fergie, Chrissy Metz, and many other well-known figures. Most beautifully, they have touched and benefited millions of souls. This gratifies him deeply. In April, 2018, Jeff was invited to Ottawa by Sophie Grégoire Trudeau–gender equality activist and the wife of Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau–to film a conversation about emotional healing and inclusivity. She had been sharing Jeff’s words in speeches and social media posts for some time. Excerpts from that powerful dialogue are viewable on Sophie’s Facebook and Instagram pages. Jeff is also the founder of Soulshaping Institute and Enrealment Press. He lives in Canada with his wife, poet Susan Frybort

TITLE Where You're At Right Now Is Perfect! Even If It Doesn't Feel Like It!   GUEST Solo episode   EPISODE OVERVIEW We are all doing the best we can right now.  There is no wrong way to experience this global pandemic, and whatever we are feeling or experiencing is ok.  What will it take for us to allow ourselves to accept all the ways we are experiencing this time.   PODCAST HOST Patricia Young works with Highly Sensitive People (HSPs) helping them to understand their HSP traits, and turning their perceived shortcomings into superpowers. Patricia is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker, who is passionate about providing education to help HSPs and non-HSPs understand and truly appreciate the amazing gifts they have to offer. Patricia works globally online with HSPs providing coaching. Patricia also facilitates online groups for HSPs that focus on building community and developing skills (identifying your superpowers, boundaries, perfectionism, dealing with conflict, mindfulness, embracing emotions, creating a lifestyle that supports the HSP, communication and more).   LINKS   YOU DON'T HAVE TO BE A PARAGON OF PRODUCTIVITY DURING A PANDEMIC! Jeff Brown--https://www.facebook.com/SOULSHAPING/videos/835174990310620/UzpfSTEwMjM2MjUyMDY6MTAyMjAyMzg5MDA4NTU3MTk/   HSP Online Course--https://unapologeticallysensitive.com/hsp-online-groups/   To write a review in itunes: click on this link https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/unapologetically-sensitive/id1440433481?mt=2 select “listen on Apple Podcasts” chose “open in itunes” choose “ratings and reviews” click to rate the number of starts click “write a review”   Website-- https://unapologeticallysensitive.com/ Facebook-- https://www.facebook.com/Unapologetically-Sensitive-2296688923985657/ Closed/Private Facebook group Unapologetically Sensitive-- https://www.facebook.com/groups/2099705880047619/ Closed/Private Facebook group for therapists and healers—Unapologetically Sensitive Therapist’s Group-- https://www.facebook.com/groups/208565440423641/ Instagram-- https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube-- https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail-- unapologeticallysensitive@gmail.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive Music-- Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com

Jeff Brown is a former criminal lawyer, psychotherapist, film-maker and author of 6 books including Soulshaping and Grounded Spirituality. In this episode Jeff and Tyger discuss the journey to finding and living out your life’s purpose, grounded spirituality and enrealed relationships. Follow Jeff’s work via his socials: @jeffbrownsoulshaping https://www.facebook.com/SOULSHAPING/

Ps Greg Barnes / 13 October 2019 / PM

This week we continue our series, “Power in Prayer,” by looking at Paul's prayer in Colossians 1:9-14. Prayer is essentially our link into the face-to-face relationship with the Living God, who is ultimate love.

Is it possible to be a spiritual being in a human body? Transcendent, yet grounded? And why is that so many “spiritual leaders” tell us to leave our feelings behind? How is it possible to be truly connected to another person - including on the spiritual level? To get to the heart, body, and soul of these questions, we’re having a return visit from Jeff Brown, author of the recently released book “Grounded Spirituality”. Jeff’s work is focused on connecting you to your precious, unique divinity - in a way that’s practical, connected, and...real. Or as Jeff Brown might say...enrealed. If you’re curious to hear our first episode together, you can also check out Episode 118 of Relationship Alive - Crafting an Uncommon Bond and Soulshaping with Jeff Brown. As always, I’m looking forward to your thoughts on this episode and what revelations and questions it creates for you. Please join us in the Relationship Alive Community on Facebook to chat about it! Sponsors: Find a quality therapist, online, to support you and work on the places where you’re stuck. For 10% off your first month, visit Betterhelp.com/ALIVE to fill out the quick questionnaire and get paired with a therapist who’s right for you. Resources: Visit Jeff Brown’s website to learn more about his books and his other projects. Pick up a copy of Grounded Spirituality by Jeff Brown on Amazon. FREE Relationship Communication Secrets Guide - perfect help for handling conflict and shifting the codependent patterns in your relationship Guide to Understanding Your Needs (and Your Partner's Needs) in Your Relationship (ALSO FREE) Visit www.neilsattin.com/grounded to download the transcript, or text “PASSION” to 33444 and follow the instructions to download the transcript to this episode with Jeff Brown. Amazing intro/outro music graciously provided courtesy of: The Railsplitters - Check them Out Transcript: Neil Sattin  Hello and welcome to another episode of Relationship Alive. This is your host Neil Sattin.  Neil Sattin  It's always a thrill to get a return visit from a particularly awesome guest. And today is going to be one of those days. Here to talk about the, his new book "Grounded Spirituality," is Jeff Brown, who is also the author of "Soulshaping," and "An Uncommon Bond," and in fact we had him here on Relationship Alive, I guess it was probably about a year and a half ago, maybe, to talk about those two books. And if you're curious to hear that episode you can visit Neil-Sattin-dot-com-slash-soul-shaping. All one word. And today, we're going to talk about this approach to living a spiritual life that allows us to be fully grounded in who we are as humans in terms of our unique existence on this planet right now. I'm not going to try to describe the whole thing that's what I'm here to talk to Jeff Brown for. However I just want to say that for me personally this book came at a really challenged time when I've been going through a lot in my own life and I found some of the exercises in this book to be really helpful. And some of the viewpoints represented to help dispel some of the myths that I've been carrying around with me about what it means to be a spiritual being in a human body. And and helped me integrate in a in a new way that's been really helpful and transformative in terms of my day to day life right now. So I found the book to be really inspiring and that's why I'm so excited to be sharing it with you along with Jeff Brown it's auth, it's author.  Neil Sattin  So if you want to download a transcript of today's conversation, which promises to be quite far reaching, then I encourage you to do so at Neil-Sattin-dot-com-slash-grounded, as in "Grounded Spirituality," not as in your grounded for being a bad human. And you can always text to the word Passion to the number 3-3-4-4-4 and follow the instructions to also get access to the transcripts and show notes for today's conversation. I think that's it for starters. So Jeff Brown, welcome back to Relationship Alive.  Jeff Brown  Great to be with you Neil. It's good to be here.  Neil Sattin  We're here to talk about "Grounded Spirituality," and I gave my off the cuff definition in the intro but I'm wondering if you might be able to give us a quick synopsis of what you mean by a "grounded spirituality," and maybe contrast that with what people tend to talk about when they're talking about spirituality and why this distinction is so important for you? Jeff Brown  So let me just read from the book the grounded spirituality definition then go into the second part of your question.  Neil Sattin  Sure.  Jeff Brown  "Grounded spirituality is an all encompassing experience of spirituality that is rooted in and thread throughout all aspects of our humanity and earthly experience. We begin and end our spiritual quest within the ground of our being, our embodied humanness, as both interpreter of experience and as our individuated portal to divinity we don't look outside of our human form for spirituality we look deeper with a name and form, cultivating a more refined understanding of the divine reflection that exists right in the heart of our selfhood. We honor its sacred qualities and transformative properties celebrating it as the perfectly constructed laboratory of expansion that it is. With our feet rooted firmly on Mother Earth and in daily life, we become grounded in reality in all its identifiable forms. We expand outward and inward from there. In essence grounded and spirituality are synonyms. They both mean reality. The more deeply grounded you are in your body and selfhood, the more fully you are here. The more fully you are here, the more spiritual your experience. It's from the depths of your being that you have the greatest access to the everything."  Jeff Brown  So for me you know I mean, my journey really began in the psychotherapeutic process. I didn't really have any idea of this thing called spirituality so I really... And, and as I went through that process and moved from more of a talk therapy model to working with Al Lowen and doing other somatic psychotherapy techniques, I found that the more deeply I opened and released the more expanded my vista. I felt like at the end of sessions or at the end of holotropic breathwork, I felt completely and deeply here in a unity consciousness field. And, but it happened through my body and it happened through the psycho emotional release. It didn't happen through anything separate from or distinct from my day to day experience. It was all coming through and threaded through my humanness. So I think I carry that forward and then began to explore this thing called spirituality and it began really with the love experience I wrote about in "An Uncommon Bond," and coming into a unified field or what I called the Unified Field from the love experience again through my heart and through my body through my being and then I began to encounter people like Bhagavan Das, and made Karmageddon and all kinds of other people in social media that were defining spirituality in a way that seemed to be devoid of humanness. I mean, it seemed to really be about something called transcendence. Something about finding selfhood finding spirituality independent of self, body, ego, feelings, stories -- everything about my humanness, everything difficult and uncomfortable was dissed. And spirituality was some awakened consciousness and an absolute consciousness field outside of my localized experience. That wasn't where I found it. I found it inside of my localized experience and so I, you know, as I've continued to work in the area and write in the area and develop ideas in the area, I began to realize that there's this thing called patriarchal spirituality. There is this thing I call the "new cage movement" there's this whole industry, industrial notion of spirituality that people are economically dependent on that tries to set off our humanness from our spirituality and that's just simply has not been my experience, and I feel as though that's one of the reasons why our species is in trouble because this way as in many other ways we continue to dissociated from our humanness in quest of something outside of it without understanding that the true integration happens has to happen right in the heart of it.  Neil Sattin  I love that. And I'm thinking now of like the first place that I want to go with this, is, uh, that notion of transcendence and how helpful it has been for people to explore that to, to explore witness consciousness and, to in some senses let's just use the phrase rise above their, the drama and the chaos of human existence in order to get some perspective some peace. And your book is written as a dialogue between yourself and this character named Michael who is really rooted in this sense of spiritual journey that's all about transcending. Transcending reality or being far enough above it that you're you're not drowning in the chaos of it. And I think that's why it's so alluring to people because it, it's can feel easy to drown in the chaos of, of life and emotions and circumstances. So. Um.And you of course talk about Eckhart Tolle as a great example of someone who is you know the figurehead in some respects of the modern western transcendence movement. And so I'm wondering for you, where's the value in learning this witness consciousness and being able to take perspective vs. living there? Jeff Brown  So the simple way I put it is that detachment is a tool. It's not a life. So for me... And transcendence can be defined you know, definitional stuff is very important and we won't go too far into it here. But you know what one person calls "transcendence," another person call something else. So the whole language of rising above being heightened all of that for me is part of the patriarchal bypass movement. That's not to say that being able to pull up and out and look at your localized self through various meditative and other techniques gain perspective on your habitual range of emotion, on the stories you tell yourself, and the way you move through the world on the various forms of anxiety that operate within you, is a good thing. It helped me enormously to be able to pull out of my very localized experience of Jeff Brown, from that super crazy childhood, and begin to witness myself and recognize and excavate parts of me that I didn't have access to in my habitual way of moving through the world. I have no issue with it. If Tolle  had written, "Power of Now," a book that I call the "power of self-avoidance." If if Tolle had written that book and he had said, "Look, I..." As he said in the beginning I think he said, he was suicidal and very troubled. If he'd said, "Look, I had all kinds of problems. And one morning I woke up and I developed, had developed some kind of a technique or access to a particular consciousness that gave me access to my material." Don't call it a pain body, don't talk about it like you're talking about a car part, acknowledge your tender woundedness, and then he said, "And I spent a lot of time out there getting perspective on where I'd been. Understanding my ancestral context, understanding how this painful material wove its way through my ways of being, and then I developed techniques for coming back down into that material," as though the material is in fact quite true and quite real and no illusion, no bashing of the ego, no bashing of the self, no bashing of the feelings, no bashing of emotions, no bashing of anything human. Acknowledging it, recognizing it, and understand that you needed to bring another consciousness into it in order to find the balance. The weave. The Holy Holy. That you need to move through the world with a connection to a more unified field and a profound and deep and worked through awareness of the localized self. If he had said that, I got no problem with that book. But he didn't.  He called that a, what'd he call it "a guide for enlightenment" or something in this, in the sub header? When you present the detachment or that as something that is the end of the story essentially to me that's just dissociative and that's not going to serve this humanity. We know why people want to do it. They're uncomfortable here. It's painful here. So they use the meditation as a drug or they use witnessing consciousness as a drug, and they convinced themselves they've gone to that superior place because they're numbing and detaching from all that material that's stirring up inside of them. It's still in there. It still shows up in their personal life. None of these teachers tell you about their personal lives, but you find out things about a lot of spiritual teachers' personal lives and you realize that this is an industry and they're telling you a story about their lives that isn't the whole story. Their stuff is still activated, their stuff is still working on them. They have not resolved work through all those pieces. And so for me what we need to do is develop a spirituality that acknowledges the wisdom and brings techniques to bear on people to be able to pull up and out, to pull back and look at themselves, to do the witnessing consciousness trip, to have a taste of something called "unity consciousness," and then to come back down into the body with that wisdom and find the weave between transcendence and imminence. That for me is the truest human experience.  Neil Sattin  So let's contrast that with maybe some of your experience around the more human material. So when we come back in and write about how much is tends to be locked in the body and we've had right, Peter Levine on the show several times so that's that's I think, hopefully a level of discourse that listeners are familiar with, this idea that we're storing trauma in our body and if we're not dealing with it, then we're gonna have to stay in this dissociated state in order to feel like we're somehow coping, and I could, I could see like the freedom the illusion of freedom in that for people because we can't live there, there's that reality of your back in your, within your human form and there's still some shit to work through.  Jeff Brown  Absolutely. It's, I mean trauma. It's encoded in the body. Its stored in the body. It's in the body. So I knew this in a very palpable way, when I shifted from being a talk therapy client to being a body centered psychotherapy client, and I would sit with Alexander Lowen for who was the co-founder of Bio and I would sit and talk for 15 minutes with him and he'd just be looking at my body and he'd be engaging my mind because he knew I needed that to feel safe, and I knew what he was doing but I needed to do it. And then he would say, "All right, you ready to work? You ready to get to work?" And so to get undressed, so I get into my underwear, my shorts whatever I would do and he would start working me, in the body, grounding me in the body, going over the stool, tantruming, kicking, and all of a sudden I would have access to a completely different experience of reality than my waking consciousness. It was painful. It was horrifying. There were memories that I had no conscious connection to in my day to day life, and understandably, I had to survive and get through my life. I couldn't be in touch with all that trauma but my experience of deep inside of my body was radically and remarkably different than who I thought I was. And I had tried going up and out I had been around the bypass movement I had attempted to be a bypasser. I would love to be a bypasser. But I just can't be a bypasser, it's just not, it, it's not in the way that I'm organized internally. But you know at the same time I was living kind of in between. I wasn't a bypasser but I wasn't going deep into the caverns of my own body consciousness. So Lowen, by going to Lowen, manifesting Lowen, what, however we characterize it, I was forced to go back down into that material. I chose to go back to into that material and and then I began to understand this deep and profound connection between this thing we could call imminence, the localized the day to day, the mundane whatever we call it and this thing called transcendence or unity consciousness field or the non-dual world, and then I would encounter it the spiritual world, they were talking about non duality and they all seem flatlined. They talk like automatons, they were they were addicted to meditation, you know, TM-ers, I knew so many TM-ers, who were like yogic flying and their personal lives were utterly insane, you know, there was no bridge. So I began to understand that my body was the bridge. My body is the bridge and it's the way that I try to make sense of how I can hold all of these threads of consciousness at the same time. And so. And Peter Levine is one of the great brilliant pioneers, and I noted him in the book. So his John Perocco, so is Wilhelm Reich. So is, you know, David Berceli is doing great work. Lowen, of course, did utterly brilliant work these people to me are the true spiritual teachers, because I define spirituality as reality, Neil. So the one who guides us or supports us in a movement towards being in touch with all threads of reality which must begin within the self it has to begin within the self, itself. To me those are the true spiritual teachers, not the ones who master a singular thread of consciousness master witnesses master meditators masters at the art of our premature forgiveness. There's a million of them out there calling themselves spiritual teachers to me there's nothing spiritual about them because all they've done is perfected one thread and they're not able to function within all of the threads of the human experience.  Neil Sattin  That's one thing that's so appealing to me about your, your writing in "Grounded Spirituality," is this way that you continue speaking to "integrating." Integrating the spiritual awareness, integrating what's happening within your body, integrating your emotional awareness, integrating your intuition so that it it all becomes part of you as an alive, dynamic being. And what I've seen, what I've witnessed, it feels kind of funny to use that word, with lots of my clients who have been going through this sort of thing is that when people are totally focused on the meditative path, it actually creates a lot of challenges in relationship, because there's all that unconscious material that's still running them in the ways that they interact with each other or conversely they're they're kind of not really interacting with each other. They're, they're like two dissociated beings, or more likely one dissociated being, and another, who's like trying to call them back and then both of them of course have their work to do in order to to arrive at this place of being more integrated and unfolding in that way because I think it's it's not a static place, right? It's this dynamic place where you continually arrive again and again.  Neil Sattin  Absolutely. I mean this is why the mindfulness revolution is dangerous. This is why the, you know, the society wide industry now really related to meditation is dangerous. I mean I get that meditation can be a wonderful technique for connecting to the self for pulling away from the localized material for periods of time, to getting a break from what it means to be a human being, you know, or at least to get a break from some aspect of that. But the problem is again, if it's not also coupled with some kind of re entry process and reintegration process, it's like we're moving towards inclusivity with respect to gender, with respect to sexuality, certainly with respect to race, you know, ethnicity, all kinds of ways. But I believe because the spiritual community is the one area in society where nobody's allowed to critically review it. It's amazing how well, how effective patriarchal spirituality in its origins has been at preventing us from deconstructing. You just got to go on my Facebook wall, when I put up a post where I'm critically reviewing a teaching, and how many conscious people even, really people who've really done work on themselves say, "Oh my God. How can you do that. You have no right to critique that person's teaching. You have no right to critique that experience." They're OK if we critique politics. They're OK if we deconstruct legal decisions. They're OK with us critically reviewing religion, but not spirituality. And this is the biggest part of the problem. You know if we're going to move in the direction of an inclusive world we have to allow for the critical review of everything that is not inclusive and that really includes spirituality because spirituality is growing in popularity, religion is becoming less popular worldwide. And if we keep moving in the direction of this protectorate this nonsense about certain spirituality as being a sacred cow we're leading humanity away from inclusively while at the same time pretending that we're moving them in the direction of something more advanced it's not more advanced if it's not inclusive.  It can't be.  Neil Sattin  I suppose the one thing that really speaks to me in your writing is that sense of the imminence that you talk about being here, in the here and now, partly because I feel like that is really the place where relationship actually springs from at least springs from in its most, most healthy manifestation. You know, it's two people who are actually being fully here and alive to what's happening within themselves.  Jeff Brown  Right.  Neil Sattin  And, and. That's the thing that I think scares me a little bit about the spirituality movement is the way that it's discouraging people from actually feeling their full experience here with another human. Because that of course is what propels the growth that happens in relationship with another person.    Right. Well you know this is the trick of patriarchal spirituality to talk about the now, while leading you away from the now. That's the whole game. "The Power of Now," that's a very powerful sounding book title. "Be Here Now." Wow, what a powerful concept. But what are we really talking about we're talking about a notion of now-ness that is bereft of individuation. That is not connected to what I call the power of then, that is the true material that you're holding within your beingness unresolved, traumatic material, unresolved memories, unresolved events and experiences that completely inform your experience of the moment. Can you be fully in the moment if threads of your consciousness and threads that are somatically embedded in structure to defend and in armored ways of functioning, actually prevent you from being here in this moment? How could I be?  Neil Sattin  Right.  Jeff Brown  If I'm holding onto all kinds of stuff. And as a result of that early stuff I shallowed my breath. I pulled my head up and away from my body I tighten my hips, I rigidified my system, can I say that I'm actually in the now, in a full and complete sense? Of course not. So most of the people who are teaching now-ness are actually tricking you, they uh, or they're tricking themselves or both. They are the farthest thing from being in the moment because their version of the now is this patriarchal, cave dwelling, meditative absolute consciousness field, where you diss the self, you diss the story, you diss the ego you diss your body sometimes, you diss your feelings. All of that is an illusion, all of that is misidentified. But what's real is some version of the nowness where you're floating in the clouds scapes like we're birds or something? And you're having some experience of this absolute field of enlightenment, as though there is such a thing, as though we're not in process, as though it's not a relative experience? To me it's a big lie. So then people are going, "Wow, I get to be in the now." It gets... And the trick is we do get a little bit of relief when we get access to these techniques because they do pull us up but out of that worry-mind. Alright, I get that. But you have to look a little closer because then they go farther, they're actually taking you farther and farther away from your humanness and it's particularly dangerous for trauma survivors who really need to have a sense of intactness and integration and we're being led in the direction of dissolution of the ego, denial of the story, um, dishonoring of their feelings, all of it is unreal and untrue. And you know what,  what really got me going in this in 2013, someone I new on Facebook hung themselves after they'd bought into all these new cage and patriarchal notions of spirituality, fired their therapist and when their stuff kept haunting them in the middle of the night, they had nobody to turn to because now they had dissed all of that, and then they ended up hanging themselves and they announced it in advance, it was very clear what was coming. And I called the cops and tried to get them to go and they went and they couldn't do anything and then they hung themselves and that's when I really began to understand, and I'm understanding in my "Grounded Spirituality" discu-discussion group on Facebook. You hear these stories about how these bullshit versions of spirituality have damaged and destroyed lives, you know, and then you, you feel, I have felt compelled to find a voice that I'm not comfortable sharing in an effort to try to encourage us in the direction of a new spirituality not one that was fostered by men who couldn't admit their fucked up ness and had to go into meditation caves and convinced a village that they were the enlightened masters, that we're bringing great wisdom for twenty years sitting in a meditation cave being served by the villagers. That nonsense is ridiculous, that doesn't bring us into integration with ourselves or with humanity and now I think we need to move in the direction, as sacred activists, to bring ourselves into integration spiritually just like we're trying to bring everything else into integration.  Neil Sattin  Can you draw a distinction for me, between what, how what we're talking about is spiritual, and sacred, since you just used that word vs. just, I'm going to a body centered therapist healing my old traumas.  Jeff Brown  Mmmm, reframe the question?  Neil Sattin  So in other words. How is what you're talking about different than, like if I were able to go to see, I know Alexander Lowen is no longer with us, but if I were able to go with him, is that in and of itself a spiritual experience? Or is there something more that's part of the spirituality that you're talking about? The grounded spirituality.  Jeff Brown  So, so, I'll give you my Alexander Lowen moment because I was beginning to now to question the very beginning of, what is spirituality? So I brought it to him. I think it was in our last session I said, "So, Al, what is this thing they're talking about? About spirituality. What does this even mean?" You know, and he went: "UFFF." Like he was annoyed by the question and he said, he said, he said, "Going into your body, enlivening your body, getting your body grounded, and spirited. That's spirituality." So I think for me anything that we do that brings us into a more complete experience of reality, I would call a spiritual experience. I mean everything is spirituality. Spirituality is reality for me.  My opposition is simply to anything that's calling itself spirituality because of the way that I define it as reality. Those things that are only limiting our experience to certain elements of the human equation while dissing and disconnecting and boundarying themselves against the other part of it, to me are not actually part of the spiritual experience. So, the real spiritual teacher, if anyone is a spiritual teacher and really I say later in the book really nobody is. But you know for me somatic psychotherapists came closer to that because I felt that because they were taking me into my body and into the body of my experience and through that portal I had more access to a broader and inclusive experience of reality that felt more like a spiritual teaching than going to a non dual meeting and sitting in a Satsang, and accessing one very particular, elitist notion of what it means to be a human being while disconnecting from and dissing all the rest.  Neil Sattin  Got it. I'm wondering if you could offer one of the exercises from your book, so that our listeners can get a flavor for the kinds of experiences that we're being invited into.  Jeff Brown  Yeah, I have one called the excavation meditation. In "The truth is the gateway to the moment," chapter so I'll read that.  Neil Sattin  Okay great.  Jeff Brown  Great. Maybe you can do it, Neil. "Sit on a chair on the floor or on a cushion in whatever position feels most comfortable. While sitting do not close your eyes or focus your gaze directly ahead or above you. Instead keep your eyes opened and focus downward looking directly and with great curiosity at your body temple. Gaze at your body as you would a loved one. Begin to make contact with your breath, inviting it into awareness, feeling it move through you. First, start with gentle breathing as if you are gradually warming up. Then, invite your breath to move strongly and pointedly throughout your body infusing your body with life force, pushing into and beyond tightly held regions if you feel resistance do not hesitate or recoil. Breathe even stronger. If you feel emotions do not merely watch them as they float past. Instead immerse yourself in them deepen into feeling, inviting all held emotions and memories to be fully felt. Use the breath as an excavation tool. With your breath purposefully dig deep. Your aim is to bring repressed material to the surface, where it can be released and reintegrated. Allow this meditation to become a kind of visceral physical landscape of feeling and sensation. If there are tears, feel into and move them, to the extent that you can. If there's anger feel into and move it, to the extent that you can. If there are words or sounds express them fully. If you find yourself turning toward your habitual meditation style that includes a focus on the sensations of the body, return to the breath and intensify it. If you find yourself getting distracted by thoughts return to the breath and intensify it. If you find yourself wanting this exercise to end, return to the breath and intensify it, whatever arises return to the breath and intensify it. Your breath is your excavation tool and your guide. Now you are not just watching the body as it contracts and expands, you are fully experiencing and inhabiting the body, feelings, emotions, sounds, sensations, textures, roars, all and everything. Stay with this process until you have fully abandoned the watcher and have become a full bodied total experiencer feeling, moving, expressing and releasing as fully as you can."  Jeff Brown  So I think for me you know this notion of monkey mind was very interesting, you know, it was like, OK I've got a monkey mind and I, so, when I wrote "Soulshaping,"  I was kind of a little bit more in that version of spirituality and talked about the monkey mind, and then I began to realize that really it was a monkey heart. You know, that focusing on the mind, getting inside of the mind, witnessing the mind, having various meditative, meditative techniques within the mind itself didn't seem to get me anywhere. I was just sort of going into one part of the mind to try to calm down another part of the mind. It felt like a very safe and irrational way to go about it, because when I went down into the body when I opened the material in this this armored temple of mine, I excavated feeling. I excavated sound. I excavated the need to rage or cry or whatever came through me. At the end of those discharges, I felt as though my mind completely calmed down. So it seemed very clear to me that this notion, this patriarchal notion, that everything is happening up high, and the mind is to blame for everything, which seems to be at the root of almost all of those spiritualities, if you read them, they're always blaming the mind, seemed to me to be a very safe and convenient thing, it was like talking to Michael, it was like Michael was at a safe place, was like how women have been perpetually frustrated by men who haven't accessed their feelings -- it was all the same thing.  Jeff Brown  It was like a little boy who, who, who had pain and and didn't want anyone to know he was in pain so he, he picked up the Captain America shield and said, "I am Captain America," became a master. To me all of this mastering the mind nonsense didn't seem to get me anywhere. The only way that I ever changed anything inside of my mind really fundamentally was to change something inside of my heart and I think at the heart of patriarchal -- grounded spirituality is the belief not only that we live inside of the body, and through the body is a portal to all of it, but also that we understand the importance of clearing this emotional debris that obstructs our, our lense, that obstructs our presence. That makes it impossible-possible for us to actually be in the now. We could be in the now in a cerebral sense. We could be in the now in a tangible literal sense, but in a felt sense if we're not in the now we're not in the now at all.  Neil Sattin  So I'm sitting with all of your words and also just with my experience from being guided through that process earlier and. And it rings true for me on the show I've recently had a triumvirate of AEDP therapists. I'm not sure if you're familiar with that modality but it's, I wouldn't, it's not body centered, per say, but the whole focus in that modality is on healing early attachment wounds relationally, through, with your therapist and they, they bring this whole skill set of co-regulation that I've found really helps me access these deep places, these deep wounded places, and heal in relationship with another person.  Jeff Brown  Great.  Neil Sattin  And at the same time what that process is with those, with that therapy has helped me see is just how much I am carrying around at any given moment. And you know I'm 45 years old. I've got probably, at least 45 years of things coming at me crosswise and it's not that everything has come at me crosswise, there, I've had a lot of blessed experiences in my life as well.  Jeff Brown  Right.  Neil Sattin  But those crosswise experiences I wouldn't say that I had the proper support as a kid to really handle those big feelings and I don't think many people do.  Jeff Brown  Right.  Neil Sattin  And so the technique that you just offered with connecting with the breath and, and you know, I loved how it started and even though I read it in your book I still like, when you said, when you invited me into the exercise, first thing I did was close my eyes you know and then the next thing you said was, open your eyes, and it was just like pretty amusing for me. And, and then I felt like by going through it, it really did help me access something that's here within me now. And you know for me it was this sense of, "Oh there are some tears there." Like I said I've been going through some challenges right now, some personal discovery that that's been like really eye opening for me as I look back over the landscape of my life. And so here in this moment I was super present to some, some grief and, and it was mixed with love that invitation to be looking at my body temple, as you name it. I think how also helped me connect with not only the sadness I was feeling in that moment but also the love that I had for this vehicle, this vessel for my, for my earthly experience. So I'm, I'm really just appreciating I, I felt within me like, OK if I weren't sitting here talking to you for the purposes of having a podcast like there, there are real deep aspects of that experience that I could have gone into and that moment right.  Jeff Brown  Right. Right. And end of an end for all kinds of various reasons we, we don't you know or we can't. Even though I could probably easily hold the space for that. And as you could for me, I think. You know we our adaptations and you know survivalist tendencies and practical response, all that stuff. You know, one thing I understand, it's very simple in a way when I think about this thing called spirituality, is that everybody I've ever known as part of this human collective at this stage of human development is carrying an enormity of unresolved individual, very personal and ancestral material collected material and you know we approach this question of, What is Enlightenment? What is awakening? All these kinds of things. And it seems kind of preposterous to me, and I actually mean that with some compassion, that we try to answer these questions when we're not actually fully inhabiting our bodies. When we're walking around in these deeply armored and obstructed temples and then trying to ask the question, what has meaning? You know, what has, what is awakening. What does it mean to be an enlightened or enlightening consciousness? What is enrealment? All these things if we don't begin within clearing the emotional debris that obstructs us and affects our beliefs and our behaviors and our energies and our, and our relationships. I mean we see this all over the relationship field where at this stage of human development it's all most people can do to figure out who they are individually, let alone try to work it out with another person in the room for 30 years. I mean if you think about it it's a great miracle when two people can survive 30 years or even 30 days together given the amount of material we're carrying. And so for me and it's kind of simple. Before we go farther into the question of what is the most expanded consciousness, we need to clear the debris.  You know it's like trying to see what a room looks like when the room is completely filled with garbage, you can't. You can see the dimensions, maybe the size of it, but you can't really get a sense of that room. And I think that that's where we are. And I think that the more techniques we develop, not to pull us up and out, sure, for survival purposes. Sure, when we need to disassociate because sometimes we do, and I honor that and I've employed those techniques. I still do, I'm employing them right now in the last couple of weeks but at the same time until we start to develop takes to techniques, like Peter Levine's work, like Logan's work, that really bring us down into the truth of what we're holding not calling it a pain body like it's a car part, but acknowledging our tender woundedness and the tender woundedness of the collective. Finding ways to get into that material, to hold it safely, individually, collectively, therapeutically. Move it through so that it's resolved transformed whatever can be healed, can be healed, whatever can't be healed is managed. All of that, I don't think we even know what we're talking about when we talk about awakening. I think we're just full of shit to be honest.  And I think that's because we're literally are full of shit and we need to move that debris but before we can begin to access the truer and deeper questions of our lives.  Neil Sattin  How would you suggest someone know whether or not, because this, this experience of accessing, the, you know, let's say you rise above, you see the, the garage full of boxes and boxes of old stuff and then you're like, Okay, I'm not going to stay in this risen above state I'm gonna go back and I'm going to start cleaning things out, I'm gonna clean house. When do you think someone needs help and support in that realm? Because I think that's you know the illusion that we have about big feelings and this is, I think, part of the cycle is when we're young those big feelings, especially when we're not given a safe container for them. They do feel like they're there too big they overwhelm the system and our nervous systems aren't, they aren't essentially capable of handling them. So, so then we have this irrational fear as an adult that we can't move through them when in fact like going into a feeling like that it does... It comes on strong and then it does subside and leaves you in a better off place, at least that's been my experience. And yet at the same time, I also have this feeling that for some people they may need a container or someone who's there to kind of help hold the space for them to have those kinds of experiences and so how in your opinion how would I know where I was landing on that spectrum?  Jeff Brown  I mean, I don't know that you would. I mean a great many -- most people walk around you know living far distance from their body. Was that a line from I think it was, Walter Mitty or something: "He lived a fair distance from his body." Um. You know, I feel like what has to happen is this conversation has to be normalized and, within society. And I think it's beginning to happen and I think that it needs to begin to happen in the school system, where, there's some forum created for emotional attunement because we're talking about not being attuned at an early age for a healthy emotional release for supported release within the school, within the classroom, with teachers, with practitioners that are part of that. I think it has to happen in corporate environments where we learn how to attuned to and move material that's preventing us from being most effective. I think we need to have some kind of release chambers on street corners, where people can go inside and smash a cube with a baseball bat and normalize it, normalize healthy anger release, because it's, anger has been so deeply stigmatized that now all of it's restrained, repressed, and gets acted out in all kinds of weird passive aggressive, inappropriate ways. I think we just have to make this part of our every part of society so that attunement and release are normal and are considered to be healthy steps towards a healthy society. And, and then people will be able to gauge themselves. So right now you have people walking into a b- a body centered psychotherapist room who've never really enlivened their body. Who've been adapting, amoring in a million different ways. All they know is that consciousness. That's how they've organized themselves to survive in the crazy world and and then they have the super extreme experience of grounding, opening it. "Oh my God, what is this?" And many of them leave. Many people will go to somatic psychotherapy sessions and never do more than one, because it's, it's not normalized within society. It's startling. It's stigmatized and it's a radical experience of opening in a system that's been closed. So I think it's on all of us to create some kind of a reality where the conversation about how angry I am or I'm at level four in my anger quotient, or I've got grief at Level 2 or however you want to language it, begins part of our day to day conversation. So when people cry in a coffee shop people don't look at them and make faces. They come over and they sit around them and they hold the space for them. Those kinds of things need to happen. I believe they might happen and they are beginning to happen in some ways but not happening quickly enough.  Neil Sattin  Yeah. Yeah. I agree.  Jeff Brown  So you and I, so you and I are good examples. So you know it happens between people you know. I mean we're damaged in relationship and we heal in relationships, so here are you and I. I read the meditation not even thinking you might be having an experience of it. You have an experience of it. So then the question is how can I hold the space for that experience for you, so that you actually make some progress internally, resolutionally in a 10 or 15 minute period and model that to humanity and then as we model that to humanity, especially as men, which is so important to model this to men, in particular. And not only but in particular, then we begin to make progress.  Neil Sattin  Yeah. Yeah, I think that's really true. That's really true. And it feels true also in terms of my experience. You know when I take something like a moment like this and then go out into the world then I start feeling those innately, I'm putting, I'm making the little quote marks with my fingers, those spiritual unity consciousness type experiences and I think they emerge from being really deeply in touch with...  Jeff Brown  Your feelings.  Neil Sattin  Yeah. My feelings these real parts of me.  Jeff Brown  Yeah. This is... I'm not opposed to unity consciousness but I'm not interested in a unity consciousness experience that is limited to a transcendent field. I want my connection to the everything to come from the heart of the body itself and the emotional body. And then it feels like a more sustainable experience. And it actually feels like a more expansive experience for me. And I also feel safer because I haven't had to bifurcate my consciousness to have that experience. So now I'm afraid to come back down to earth and I'm going to crash at some point because you know I'm not bridging the two. If I start from within the body... So, so you know in interacting with Michael in the book was a kind of one of my struggles. It was like, what he's calling awakening or transcendence is something that's very different, may be very different from what I experienced as awakening or transcendence. Because I did it from within my body, my feet grounded on the earth plane. So are we even talking about the same experience? His feels flight, you're more kind of motivated by or intended in the direction of getting away from something, whereas mine felt like it was about really trying to be here for all of it. You know the real "Be Here Now" the one that actually starts within my body, not renaming myself, as Ram Dass did, but as Jeff Brown. Jeff Brown with Jeff Brown story. With my bubbie Frannie Perlove . With my grandfather Zeyta Deela Perlove.  Neil Sattin  I'm just laughing...  Jeff Brown  With my very difficult mother Barbara Brown. All of that is real. That is not not spiritual. That is so spiritual that's my lineage. That's my ancestry. That's my flesh and bones baby. And if I'm not in my flesh and bones there's no possible way I can access an awakening consciousness.  Neil Sattin  I'm just laughing because I'm thinking of the place in the book where you talk about Eckhart totally changing his name and then...  Jeff Brown  Yeah his name is Ulrich. Neil Sattin  Right. And then like if names aren't important, then why are people changing their names?  Jeff Brown  Yeah yeah. He's got this quote about like you know "formlessness over form," it's like, well you know, and "ego is the enemy of the sacred," whatever all these people are talking about. And then they change their names. Well clearly it's important enough for them to take on another name in order to disconnect from their birth -- their name of origin. And you know, I understand the purpose that serves it gives a lot of people a break from what it meant to be, their, their origins. But because their origins are them and their origins are encoded in their bones and in their cells. Changing the name can be a temporary reprieve. But ultimately you still got to come back down to do the work inside of "Ulrich Tolle" and, Ram Dass has to still do the work that is Richard Alpert and Ram Dass  wouldn't disagree with that, I think. You know and that's everywhere in the community. Bhagavan Das's real name was Kermit Michael Riggs. He's walking around carrying everything that's Kermit Michael Riggs. He can call himself whatever he wants, he's still carrying Kermit Michael Riggs and he is Kermit Michael Riggs. So I think you know, if we're going to go down into the body, into the feelings. And I realized because we don't have templates we only have a few models, a few techniques developed, it's very difficult to invite people in this direction because then how do we get them there to stay there because there aren't that many integrated models, most of what we've been calling spirituality is bifurcated and if you really look closely, even yoga was... If you look at its origins it's called "Yoke"  It means unity. But really what they're talking about is a version of unity that gets you away from and perfects the toxic body beast again. It's still dissociative. It's still the bypass. And what we need now and what I try to ignite and support in the call to action is: people, all the people, young people out there who were interested in somatic psych, a lot of them going into inclusivity, begin to co-create models that unite these various techniques that pull us up and out or in a way to look at ourselves through a more expansive lens, whatever we call it, with the desire to be deeply living within our body and healing the trauma that obstructs our consciousness. And finding a way to weave transcendence and imminence into the holy holy what I call a "We-stern" consciousness. The quest for unity consciousness and essence fundamental to Eastern traditions and the quest for a healthy self concept, and a work through, an embodied experience of the moment, that's more fundamental to Western consciousness. And when we find that weave, then we're really going to be here for our awakening.  Neil Sattin  So I'd like to spend. Our last few minutes together today bringing this into the realm of relationship. And what I'm thinking of is how, in your book, The Evolution of this starts with being in the body and and there are a few other exercises that you offer that are all about accessing what's happened, the material that's happening within you now. And then that leads to this place of that being able to fuel a sense of who we actually are, beyond who we think we are and and mining ourselves for that, the uh, I forget the term that you use for it. But for those aspects of us that are about who we are uniquely able to be in this lifetime in this body. And I think for a lot of people there's this question of their journey found them, let's say to this place of relationship with this person, and then they start wondering well how do I know if this is a true connection, where we can grow each other, versus one where we're just going to be trapped in our woundedness together? So I'm curious to know how you would connect this body centered awareness with that question of: Is this the right person? Is this the right choice? Is this like, is this the work worth doing? Because we have all our own material that's right there for us, and then we're in, we can be in choice about the material we want to work on with another human.  Jeff Brown  Yeah I mean, I mean so the distinction let's say between "woundmates" and "soulmates," or something. Yeah, I mean, I think that you know, I think one of the dangers of the therapeutic revolution with respect to the shadow work that I am encouraging people to do, is that we make the mistake of thinking that every trigger filled connection is worth our while. I don't believe that. That has certainly not been my experience. There, you know, there are certain criterion that would determine whether or not it's worth our while and whether it isn't. And one of the most obvious ones is whether both people are willing to do the shadow work, is the most basic level question, you know. Because if, if they're not if one of them isn't, then you have a problem. You either adapt your consciousness kind of lowest common denominator to the vibration of the person who doesn't want to do the work or you walk away. But even in an experience I've been in experiences where there was a willingness for two people, myself and the other to do the deeper shadow work. But the relationship was like a nexus for so many triggers, both very obviously, individually rooted in individual experience, and all kinds of inexplicable... You know it's so difficult to language collective, ancestral, familial material, that it didn't matter how much work we did therapeutically, there was no way it was ever going to become anything other than painful. And I do not believe that we need to perpetually live in suffering in order to become conscious. I mean, we have to do work within the pain material for sure. So, I think that you know as you move into this kind of consciousness, authentic relating more deeply attuned to your material and the others, you have to ask the question, is this the kind of experience where for whatever reason without having to judge it, perpetually, we're not going to be able to move our way through this to transformation in a way that feels healthy positive and forward moving? Or is this the kind of connection that has the hope of becoming what I call a "wholemate," you know a connection that really has that more subtle, essential, soulful quality to it. And the same time is grounded in the real world in the day to day life experience and also in the working through the shadow material in a way that's forward moving. And you have to always ask that question, because not every connection, even with the best of intentions is a connection that's going to allow you to grow and evolve.  Neil Sattin  In your book you offer "the beloved meditation exercise" and I don't think we necessarily have the time and space to go through that whole thing right now. But I think it's it's actually a great, it's a great way I think to explore that question from a centered place.  Jeff Brown  Yeah. And from an embodied place. Not as a concept. You know, I had a cousin who kept asking me if a relationship, every relationship he'd say he'd asked me if it was a fit. Like I knew I would say, well you know I'd say I don't know, how do you feel? He go, "Well I think..." And I'd go: You're not answering it from I think you keep trying it's not working you need to go into your body. He didn't want to go into his body. He was very, very detached from his body and only when he finally did have a forced, kind of a forced embodiment experience, as the trauma built and built and built into kind of like a breakdown. Did he actually come to access the answers that he actually had and always knew and always carried as to whether a particular connection he was in was a fit for him. It has to happen all of it inside the body so with the beloved meditation, my effort in a way was to try to invite people inside of that temple in order to ask that primary question whether or not that connections really a fit going forward.  Neil Sattin  Right. And it's questions like, now I have it in front of me: Is this person still part of my future? Are there still lessons we need to learn from each other? Or are we complete together? Are there lessons I now need to learn on my own outside of this present relational form? Are we meant to walk together in the coming moments? Or is it time to take leave of each other? I mean these are great questions and they have to be answered from a place where you're fully...  Jeff Brown  Feeling.  Neil Sattin  Exactly. Like if they're, if those answers are coming from a place of fear then we already know what the answers are gonna be.  Jeff Brown  You can, you can answer a question about whether someone's a fit for you from your mind if you want to do a practical pros and cons list or something. But if you're asking the question of how you feel you can't answer that question conceptually, you have to enter into that very scary terrain for most of us which is the emotional and physical body. And to me, they're kind of synonymous, and drop down into that and let your body tell you what your answers are. And that's why a lot of people remain stuck, you know, and then they go and they go to a workshop experience, that has in it a body component at the end of it they know whether or not to end their relationship or not, or to go deeper because they finally access their body which is very hard to do in our cultural, overstimulated, survive, by your wits, culture. We have to have an experience of the body in order to figure out what direction to walk in our lives.  Neil Sattin  Yeah and I'm... It's interesting for me. We, Chloe and I, actually have this whole practice of using muscle testing and kinesiology to to tap into the body wisdom. And at the same time, I'm, I'm curious to see how these deeper and deeper emotional excavations will inform the body's wisdom, when we're asking those questions.  Jeff Brown  Yeah. Yeah. There's such important questions and they're not just about relationships. They're about, you know, I use the term, "truthaches," in the book, in "Soulshaping," because there are many indicators we're off-path and the way we again determine that, is we do something embodied, whatever that happens to be. Osho's dynamic meditation, holotropic breathwork, some Somatic Experiencing work. You know, bioenergetics your core energetic sessions, core energetics is amazing also and something you know that allows you to really enliven the body and let the body speak its truth. It wants to. And that's what it's built for.  Neil Sattin  Right you've got to help your body speak, and then tune yourself so that you're actually listening to what your body's saying.  Jeff Brown  Right on.  Neil Sattin  Well, Jeff I really appreciate you're here being here to join us again on Relationship Alive to talk about your work the book, "Grounded Spirituality," is a fascinating journey of a book and I appreciate that you gave me the time because we were actually in dialogue about when to do this conversation, that you gave me the time to really explore it, and try things out and it was helpful for me in my personal life and in being able to have this conversation with you. Of course because it's a really long book we could talk a lot longer, but I think I always have that feeling with you honestly that there's, there's always more to say which leaves me excited for the next conversation.  Jeff Brown  Great.  Neil Sattin  So thank you so much for joining us here today. And if people want to find out a little bit more obviously, they can pick up the book "Grounded Spirituality," and how else can they find out about you and your work?  Jeff Brown  They can check out soul-shaping-dot-com, my older site. There's some course downloads and things there are lots of stuff to read. Soul-Shaping-Institute-dot-com. I've got a couple of writing courses coming up writing your way home courses and my new Jeff-Brown-dot-co, web site will be up soon. I'm very excited about that and start doing a lot more video, start a podcast and all that and just join me on Facebook and Instagram and there all the time and interactive. And thank you Neil. I appreciate your support.  Neil Sattin  My pleasure. And just a quick additional plug for your writing course. Those are all about using writing as a vehicle for healing and finding your authentic expressed, grounded voice, right? Jeff Brown  Absolutely. I hold a very tight and safe container for people to excavate their material and write through it, and bring it in the direction of healing without any emphasis on perfect writing or perfect grammar any of that stuff. It's... There are some people who do the course and don't join the Facebook private group and go off and write and write books and a number of my students have been published but the Facebook group component, which is about 60 percent of the student body for each course, is really focused on helping to support one another to just say and to express the things they've never ever felt permission to express before so it's a really beautiful experience.  Neil Sattin  Such important work. And again if you are interested in finding out more, you can get all the links to Jeff's websites etc. through the show notes page which you can get at, Neil-Sattin- dot-com-slash-grounded, as in "Grounded Spirituality, where you can text the word "Passion" to the number 3-3-4-4-4 and follow the instructions. And thanks again Jeff for being with us today.  Jeff Brown  Thank you Neil. Appreciate it.   

For years, Emilie has been inviting "spiritual types," into her home and accepting "vibes" as payment for rent. Emilie recalls some of these new agey scams with her cousin/roommate Bo and dear friend Ziyang Wang also known as "Lucia." The three of them simply can't afford the spirituality packages they are being sold in West Hollywood and are struggling to stay grounded in the challenging entertainment industry. Luckily, they are joined by Author, Filmmaker and Grounded Spiritualist, Jeff Brown, who calls in from The Soulshaping Institute in Toronto and introduces them a practical approach to enlightenment defined in his new book, "Grounded Spirituality," a new paradigm of spirituality that is completely rooted and doesn't involve drinking expensive mint water on an Anthropologie pillow. Although, that also sounds nice. Check out Jeff Brown's work: https://soulshaping.com/https://www.soulshapinginstitute.com/Buy his book: https://www.amazon.com/Grounded-Spirituality-Jeff-Brown/dp/1988648033/ref=sr_1_2?gclid=CjwKCAjw1f_pBRAEEiwApp0JKCQGPQcjUjfmmb0felCtWE6oeZOkkzTUCWqzEg2vFq8cJfzVMSJTTxoC1oIQAvD_BwE&hvadid=329722190386&hvdev=c&hvlocphy=9060325&hvnetw=g&hvpos=1t1&hvqmt=e&hvrand=12129630213243747359&hvtargid=aud-647006051489%3Akwd-665639713674&hydadcr=24601_9648840&keywords=jeff+brown+grounded+spirituality&qid=1564518273&s=gateway&sr=8-2Follow Emilie: @emilieknowseverything Follow Bo: @boseffFollow Lucia: @langyueqinyin

For years, Emilie has been inviting "spiritual types," into her home and accepting "vibes" as payment for rent. Emilie recalls some of these new agey scams with her cousin/roommate Bo and dear friend Ziyang Wang also known as "Lucia." The three of them simply can't afford the spirituality packages they are being sold in West Hollywood and are struggling to stay grounded in the challenging entertainment industry. Luckily, they are joined by Author, Filmmaker and Grounded Spiritualist, Jeff Brown, who calls in from The Soulshaping Institute in Toronto and introduces them a practical approach to enlightenment defined in his new book, "Grounded Spirituality," a new paradigm of spirituality that is completely rooted and doesn't involve drinking expensive mint water on an Anthropologie pillow. Although, that also sounds nice. Check out Jeff Brown's work: https://soulshaping.com/https://www.soulshapinginstitute.com/Buy his book: https://www.amazon.com/Grounded-Spirituality-Jeff-Brown/dp/1988648033/ref=sr_1_2?gclid=CjwKCAjw1f_pBRAEEiwApp0JKCQGPQcjUjfmmb0felCtWE6oeZOkkzTUCWqzEg2vFq8cJfzVMSJTTxoC1oIQAvD_BwE&hvadid=329722190386&hvdev=c&hvlocphy=9060325&hvnetw=g&hvpos=1t1&hvqmt=e&hvrand=12129630213243747359&hvtargid=aud-647006051489%3Akwd-665639713674&hydadcr=24601_9648840&keywords=jeff+brown+grounded+spirituality&qid=1564518273&s=gateway&sr=8-2Follow Emilie: @emilieknowseverything Follow Bo: @boseffFollow Lucia: @langyueqinyin

Why is our thought life, rather than just our actions, important to God? Can we change negative patterns in our thinking? If so, how?

Our sins are forgiven when we come to God through faith in Jesus. Yet God sometimes calls us to express our faith in acts of restitution.

in womens national history month i wanted to give honor to women and the ability to be healed or begin healing the parts of vulnerability that have been victimized or abused. Today we speak with author & filmmaker JEFF BROWN as he discusses our need to drop into our feminine hearts for healing an entire society...tune in , you will be inspired by my chat with Jeff.

Through the spiritual discipline of biblical hospitality, we can impact God’s kingdom. This message explores practical ways to open our homes to those God has placed in our paths, and the biblical reasons for doing so.

Have you ever thought about your motives in things like giving and praying? Jesus teaches us that our motives are key in pleasing God. This message explores what Jesus said about doing “secret” works.

Does the Bible give us guidance for dealing with an over-scheduled, under-rested, and cluttered life? Actually, it does! This message explores Jesus’ teaching about the need for a more focused life.

Reminded Of Things We Already Know

Make Your Calling Sure And Never Fall

How important is it to find the "right" partner? If you're inspired by thoughts of how amazing a relationship could be - but wondering what to do next - this episode is for you. Today, we talk about the most important ingredient for having a conscious, authentic, amazing relationship. It's something you can do whether or not you're in a relationship. And doing this gives you the power to create exactly the kind of relationship that you're looking for.  I'm NOT saying that anyone could be right for you. But what I AM saying is that you have more control over your relationship destiny than you think - even if you're already in partnership. The thing is, though - it requires effort, and attention. You can't coast your way to an amazing relationship.   This episode is a follow-up to last week's episode - "Crafting an Uncommon Bond and Soulshaping - with Jeff Brown" - and inspired by a conversation with a friend of mine about that episode. Sponsors: Talkspace.com - Online therapy that matches you with your perfect therapist. You can communicate with your therapist daily - so they can be there for you during the moments you most need support. Visit talkspace.com/ALIVE and use the coupon code “ALIVE” for $30 off your first month of online therapy. Resources:   What are my top three Relationship Communication Secrets? Download for FREE here. Want to understand the needs that drive you, and your partner, to do what you do? Download that for FREE by clicking on the "Send me the Action Plan button here. Our Relationship Alive Community on Facebook Amazing intro/outro music graciously provided courtesy of: The Railsplitters - Check them Out

What do you do when you want to shift your relationship from the mundane towards something more transcendent? Is this something you could experience with just anyone? And if not, how do you know if your relationship has this potential? Also...what happens when the podcast guest starts interviewing the host?! In this week’s episode, we’re diving deep into the question of conscious relationship a bit differently, through a conversation with writer, seeker, and spiritual activist Jeff Brown.  Jeff is the author of the books Soulshaping and An Uncommon Bond, and director of the documentary Karmageddon: The Movie. His words and wisdom shine light on the journey of becoming more and more who we are meant to be, should we choose to follow that path. It’s not meant to be easy, but it is totally worth it - and in today’s episode of Relationship Alive we detail some of the important steps along the way. Neil Sattin: Hello and welcome, to another episode of Relationship Alive. This is your host, Neil Sattin. On this show, over and over again, we've been talking about the topic of conscious relationship. What does it mean to evolve your relationship to some place new, some place different? How do you recognize the patterns that are just about unhealthy relating, things that you've inherited from the culture, from your parents, from your friends, from your karma and how do you identify those things and get to a place where you can move past them to unchartered territory - that's about coming together clearly with your partner and helping each other, heal, grow and have a mission in the world, that's maybe something you do together or maybe it's supporting each other in your separate missions, but in the end, wanting both you and your partner to shine more brightly in the world and to do that in a way that enhances your connection as opposed to growing you apart? Neil Sattin: On today's show we are having a very special guest, Jeff Brown, who is the author of An Uncommon Bond which is a novel about conscious relationship. He's also the author of Soulshaping and he is followed by thousands and thousands of people on Facebook and elsewhere who tune in to the way that he writes and how it evokes new insight, new states of consciousness and it's a real pleasure to have him here with us today to talk about his book, to talk about conscious relationship and to talk about soul shaping and how we can craft our growth and development in a way that's generative for you and for the world around you as well. So thank you, Jeff Brown, for being here on Relationship Alive with us today. Jeff Brown: My pleasure Neil. I'm also quite grateful for this amazing work you're doing in the world, trying to raise awareness of conscious relationship and really deepen into the dialogue. I think it's such an important step forward for all of us. Neil Sattin: Thank you. Thank you, yeah, it's something I'm incredibly passionate about and it's always a pleasure to have, to be able to sit down with someone like you who also is equally passionate about, thinking about where we're going along with where we've been. So maybe we could start by just, I've already mentioned your books and, oh by the way, we will have a show guide for this episode so if you're interested in downloading that, you can visit Neilsattin.com/soulshaping or you can text the word 'PASSION' to the number 33444 and follow the instructions and we'll get that show guide to you. So, let's maybe just start with, what is soulshaping? Since that is at the core of your work. Jeff Brown: Soulshaping was really, I mean, when I had begun to write my first book, I was just trying to make sense of my own experience and what ultimately made sense to me at that time was that, as I looked back on my life, it seemed that I had some internalized what James Hillman called the innate image or what I have come to call 'soul scriptures', that I had some encoded sacred purpose, that included key relational figures, particular callings to certain work in the world, certain archetypal transformations that I was here to go through as though I was somehow shaping my soul towards wholeness and as I looked at every stage of my life, there were a lot of seemingly insignificant experiences in moments but there were these very fundamentally relevant and significant moments, externally sourced but also often coming from within, that seemed to be pointing me in the direction of a particular encoded path that I was here to walk in order to move in the direction of a more inclusive and whole centered consciousness. Neil Sattin: And so part of your work, I know you do soulshaping sessions with people as well, so you're writing about it and then you're also helping people discover that path for themselves? Jeff Brown: I am but I defined it very broadly. I think what shifted for me when I began, is I was very focused on callings. The calling to write Soulshaping, your work in the world right now. You know, Oprah Winfrey has worked to bring that message, whatever that message is or was, to the world and what I've come to believe and understand and so much of my session work is focused on, is really dealing with the unresolved emotional material. Because for me, I grew most in my spirituality through the evolution of my emotional processes. For me, emotional maturation and spiritual maturation are synonymous. I don't distinguish the two, that's why I'm so deeply opposed to split off or dissociative views of spirituality, ideas of enlightenment that exist, independent of the emotional body, the unresolved ego, the story that is yet to be processed, because for me, this is where most of the transformation happened. Jeff Brown: At the end of a deeper profound emotional process, I found that I was able to hold the space for the everything in a much more inclusive way. So soul shaping for me now is more than callings and archetypes. It's really, really about getting into that material that we hold individually and that we bring forward from the unresolved collective and doing the work that allows us to transform our individual and collective consciousness, so that we could move individually and collectively in the direction of a more inclusive or whole centered consciousness. Neil Sattin: And that's one thing that I really appreciated in reading An Uncommon Bond and I think you even mentioned it in your own notes at the end. This need to bring spirit into your embodiment, and so much of what I talk about and what my partner Chloe and I work on in the world is, allowing your body to be included in that experience, not in a way that is dissociating from your body, but where your somatic experience is actually intrinsic and gives you such a wealth of information about what's happening with you on those more subtle levels. I like how you did that in your book, and emphasize that... Jeff Brown: Well, I don't even understand how one has any experience of anything independent of the body. I think that all of that is just nonsensical for me. If I look back at the experience that inspired An Uncommon Bond that profound opening, all of it happened through my somatic structure. I felt as though I entered and opened and we opened together into some kind of a portal of experience, that seemed to transcend my embodied experience, but I'm not so sure that's true, I wasn't trained in the art of ecstasy, when ecstasy came my way, I didn't know how to hold it or contain it somatically and somehow imagined it was happening independent of my body. Jeff Brown: But in fact, every single piece of that experience was happening through the body and the self hood, that was the container for the experience and I'm not so sure that we're going to get anywhere, particularly if we're trying to break through the patterns that obstruct our ability to actualize love between ourselves and others, if we don't go deep back into the somatic structure and work the selfhood and work the story and work what's held in the cellular structure, in order to transform it in the direction of being able to be more open and available and sustaining of love when it arises. Neil Sattin: Yeah, I think for us, one thing that's been so profoundly transformative has been what happens in the quietness that, when Chloe and I are together, and I'm just speaking from my experience here, in the quietness and paying attention to what arises, what sensations arise, and even just speaking to those without labeling them, but just saying like, "Oh, this is where I'm experiencing some tension right now." or "I'm feeling this heat in this part of my body... " Those sorts of things end up becoming... The word that's popping into my head is transportational. They bring us somewhere to different levels of experience that wouldn't happen if you were focusing on the kind of intimacy that's just about getting each other excited and getting each other off. Jeff Brown: Right. Neil Sattin: I'm curious for you, the title of your novel is An Uncommon Bond and I'm wondering if you can talk a little bit more about what that even means, to have An Uncommon Bond? Jeff Brown: I think we may have to rely on definition, it's a little bit lengthy but maybe the first part of it. I had an experience in '98 and I had no words for this experience but this experience changed my life and I was doing a masters at Saybrook. I was at Saybrook University in San Fransisco doing a Humanistic Psych degree, a masters and it just so happened that, right at the seeming end of that connection, Jeanne Achterberg, who had written about uncommon bonds and had co-defined the term, I believe with Donald Rothberg, I was doing an Uncommon Bond weekend and I was oblivious, I had no language for this profound experience and I was in a really profoundly confused place and walked in that room and suddenly felt like somebody understood what my experience was. Let me just read the first paragraph maybe of the definition. Neil Sattin: That would be great. Jeff Brown: Yeah, "Uncommon Bonds are love connections that are sourced in the transcendent and transpersonal realms. The couple feels destined to have met, their connection is sourced in grace. This often leads to an experience of parapsychological or paranormal events, such as synchronicity, soulendipities, and non-local communications that defy known laws of time and space. There's a knowing of pure recognition of the other, a feeling of being cut from same cloth, a sense of having occupied the same body in a previous life, or perhaps one soul residing in two bodies. The lovers experience a prayer of gratitude and a sigh of relief as though coming home after decades of wandering, a transpersonal energy dances within and between the couple, spiritual practice is important to them, since the relationship is often experienced as the premiere spiritual engagement, an outgrowth of a relationship with the absolute." Jeff Brown: And then it goes on to say that, "The relationship polishes the rough diamond of the soul, for this reason, the relationship is sometimes dark, arduous, complex, accompanied by many dark nights of the soul. At the same time, there's a sense of the soul work could not happen in any other way than through the relationship, repeated dancing back and forth, no self, no disappearing wave to particle and back, characterizes the growing, changing, polishing and refining process." Jeff Brown: It's the profound crack open in the presence of another who feels destined to have walked your way in this lifetime. Feels deeply familiar even if you don't believe in past lives, you have this experience and you're certain that they existed and at the same time, at this stage of human development, because of where we're at in terms of understanding the shadow, they are remarkably difficult to sustain and particularly if one or both people in the dynamic are not egoic-ly strong enough to hold to their center and the merging, usually the studies indicate, Jeanne's studies that usually they end up breaking up unless they encounter each other or re-encounter one another at a much older age. Neil Sattin: Interesting. Jeff Brown: It's just too much to hold. It's just too much to hold. Neil Sattin: Yeah. And I think because, and this is why these kind of connections can sometimes just knock you on your ass, it's like it can... It takes you to that place where you have to recognize at some level, your dysfunction, as well as those transcendent states of, oh my God! I just met the most amazing person and they're... If it has all those feelings of reconnecting on a deep, mystical level. Jeff Brown: And that's part of the problem. And what you said earlier was true, they knock you down to your ass. Basically, they pull you up and out and that may just be because we just don't know how we get to orient that experience or to have that experience in a way that's integrated with our humanness, right? We don't have that training and I just don't know if we're at that stage developmentally where we can hold all of that at one time, that's the work. That's the work of conscious relationship. To be able to bring together the... Something called the transcendant, if in fact there is any way to transcend and the imminent. And in my experience, that's exactly what happened. Was a transport of experience or what you call a transportational experience but the opening into the light, the light was so powerful and profound, it could not help but reveal the shadow. And of course, not only our shadow, we were walking into the collective shadow in that experience because you can't have one without the other. You can't have a spirituality that only allows you to have ecstatic experience without also having the portal open to the shadow, the emergence of the shadow. Jeff Brown: So we entered into both of those places and then it just simply becomes a question of whether we're equipped, whether we're supported, whether we're capable and how toxic is our unresolved emotional material. Because if it's too toxic, if there's too much in the way of an abandonment wound, or a jealousy wound, or a betrayal wound, or whatever it is that you're carrying, it becomes almost impossible to sustain it because it just becomes too painful. Neil Sattin: Now, we spoke a little bit before the interview officially started and I come down pretty strongly on the level of, not that everyone has to stay together, like if you find someone and you fall in love that somehow you're like, you have to be together for the rest of your lives, that's not where I am. However, I do feel like there's a journey of skill building and opening and healing that could actually bring most people to this transcendent place. That's just my belief and I'm curious to know where you come down on that in terms of, do all connections have the potential to be Uncommon Bonds versus not. Jeff Brown: Yeah. I'm writing about this on an individual level in my current book. It is very similar to what people are doing individually, they're trying to pull up and out of the humanness in order to have some kind of an ecstatic or inclusive or unity consciousness experience. And then they find it's unsustainable when they try to come back into the world and they have to integrate with the world, and they have to confront their material. The unresolved material that they're actually carrying in their bodies. Jeff Brown: I think that the problem is this, if I think of dynamics I've had that started really on a ground or pragmatic level, they didn't have that element of pull up and out. They didn't have what we might call a mystical aspect. Usually, there's not enough charge in the connection to want to go through that process or to believe that you're gonna land at a place where you're going to have an expansive experience together. So usually, it starts with something that pulls you up and out that feels like there's some profound joy potentially waiting for you, if you can do some work along the path. Jeff Brown: But what I do believe, what does make sense to me is that something happens in the earth bound work, the relational work, the work that you're doing in your partnership, I'm sure, around the unresolved material that emerges, the social anxiety, the discomfort. All the levels of triggering that are happening in dynamics that have some charge to them. That if you can see that process through, and I don't think a lot of people have. We don't have a lot of love elders to talk to about this yet Neil, but I think that they do, that I have a feeling that they do integrate back into an experience of that ecstatic union in a way that feels more real to me, more sustainable for sure and may have a remarkably different tenure or resonance than the experience, for example, that I had in the initiating Uncommon Bond experience. Jeff Brown: I'm stuck with this. I'm not exactly sure which way to go with... I can't really fully answer your question because I'm still trying to figure that out myself. But I do know for sure that if you don't come back and do the earth bound work and you don't weave all the threads together within you and break through all of the obstructions within you that, for sure the experience that you're having is unsustainable. Neil Sattin: Can we get really practical for a moment and talk about what that process of resolving could look like for someone? And maybe even what's a step or two that someone could take after they listen to this episode of the podcast that would help them move along that journey. Jeff Brown: Okay, so let's say you've met somebody and you've had this awakening, we'll call it an awakening experience with them. And you feel like you've entered into some portal that feels beautiful, delicious and at the same time feels vulnerable and terrifying, or something. Then I think, probably what you would begin to do if you wanted to sustain it and deepen it and grow through it without knowing necessarily if this is someone who'll be with you for life, you don't know that really yet, is you would begin to work probably somatically to uncover all of the levels of material that are getting in the way. Jeff Brown: So for example, if you find yourself in that opening, suddenly feeling super triggered by the fact that this other person is presumably looking at other women, for example, and they may feel like they're just looking at them as they passed by them on the street, but a jealousy trigger might arise because now you have so very much to lose because your heart is so deeply opened. You have two choices, you either continue to sustain the reactivity that comes up rising in the trigger, or you decide you're going to work on your historical material. Past life aside, working on that, I don't know so much about that, but working somatically with a somatic-based psychotherapist, maybe a bioenergetic or core energetic or somatic experiencing therapist to really go deep into the caverns in the body to find out where the material is sourced, where it comes from and to try to work your way through to a more healed or transformed experience around it, so that when you re-engage in the connection and your partner happens to look at a woman walking down the street, you're not so triggered that you're going to obstruct the development of the connection. Neil Sattin: Yeah. So there's so much there in terms of being able to recognize that you have a trigger even happening and going through some sort of process to resolve whatever is stuck there that's causing the trigger. And with a jealousy trigger, it could be that there's something there, there's some reason that your safety radar is activated and that would be something to address in your coupleship. Jeff Brown: And to determine whether or not it's based in reality, or whether it's based in your holdings, right? Neil Sattin: Yeah, yeah. Exactly. Jeff Brown: The way I think of it more broadly is that if I think of my grandparents or my parents, they were organized relationally around a survivalist construct. They defined who they were by what put food on the table, and whatever roles or duties have been culturally conditioned into them, and the way that the system held that. Now, we're at the very beginning of this bridge crossing. And as a result of that, moving in the direction of authenticity as our orienting principle, that is we relate on the basis of who we really are, not on some basis of some role, duty, adaptation, disguise, or mask that allows us to get through a survivalist world. We're opening the door to a whole range of material that was really never been attended to by mostly anybody in historical terms. Certainly not in our family lineage, at least not most of us. This is the hardest time for everybody because it means if you're going to go on what we're calling a conscious relationship journey, which for me is an authentic relationship journey, you're going to confront a gigantic tsunami of unresolved material that you're holding and that's deep within the collective. Jeff Brown: You need to be brave, you need to be patient, you need to be incredibly realistic. And a lot of people are not realistic, they're dealing with fire, they don't understand what that really means. It means it's gonna go on for years and years and probably always be part of your interface because we're the first path travelers crossing the bridge towards an authentic connection. And we're carrying an enormous amount of baggage with us. Neil Sattin: Yeah. I'm letting your words wash over me because... And I'm thinking about how our parents and grandparents, because they were oriented around survival, then that was an orienting principle that allowed them to brush things under the rug or to live in pain without resolving it. Jeff Brown: They had a system. They had a system and a number of premises and beliefs that just allowed that to happen. "Don't look back." There's a million cliches that relate to that experience. They didn't expect anything different. They have no idea that anything else could even exist in that world and probably it wouldn't have been congruent with the way the world was organized. It's still really not. It takes a lot of time that we don't have to do this deeper work. And my concern is that people get an unrealistic vision of possibility for how quickly they're going to get there. I think that we need to understand we are doing the work of generations, we need to not be so damn hard on ourselves when we can't quite work a piece out, we need to allow ourselves to just step back and celebrate our little tiny victories 'cause in collective terms, they're humongous and not hold to some vision of possibility that's not sustainable or possible sociologically in one lifetime. That's not to be discourage us from doing the work, it's beautiful, it's beautiful work. But let's also be realistic about it. Neil Sattin: I was like, and yet we're gonna try. And there's... Jeff Brown: Absolutely. Neil Sattin: And there's some tension in there too because the temptation would be to, now that you're not orienting around survival necessarily but you still have to maintain. So you still have to somehow survive... Jeff Brown: We're still in a survivalist world Neil. We still have to adapt and mask and make a living and the whole culture economically is built around masking and branding and putting on a show and putting away your feelings and not throwing tantrums in the marketplace and all that stuff. It's mostly inauthentic. So that's hard stuff and then you gotta come back home to and wanna reconnect to the subtle realms, you wanna do conscious armoring, you wanna reach a stage where you go into the marketplace, you put on the armoring you have to, but you're conscious enough to know to come home and take it off. Not always that easy to take it off if you're trying to make a living and striving and grinding it out in the marketplace. And sometimes I know couples that get into this place where they're so impatient with each other because the partner comes home and they're saturated in the energy of the marketplace. Well, that's because we're just at the beginning of authenticity as a way of being and our social structures and economic structures aren't even built around any of this yet. Jeff Brown: So we have to be realistic. Let me just say my experience... My initiating Uncommon Grounds experience taught me two things, two amazing things in all of that suffering and all that ecstasy. One is the possibilities that exist between two humans, in my view are so much more profound. I mean all this work that's been done around Wilber sketching models of consciousness with men sitting in meditation caves, I'm not interested in any of that. To me that is just patriarchal spirituality, it's safer, it's easier. I know why they focus there but to me it's the tiniest fragment of possibility compared to what's possible between two hearts. Because my experience was not only did we open to another portal, I felt as though there was a way in which if we could have kept going we could have actually co-created some aspect of this universe with love as the transformative device for that. It is... We're singing about love not knowing what the hell we're talking about, but we're moving in the right direction. I mean there's a reason why we're here and we feel love for one another. It is the direction to go. We're not just here together to keep each other company, we're here together to show each other God. Jeff Brown: The other thing I learnt is how far we are for being able to sustain and deepen into that experience because of the stage we're at in the collective. Because the shadow is everywhere. Everyone is a trauma survivor if we compare their human experience to the realm of the most subtle humane vulnerable heart open possibility. So, we're going in the right direction, we got a real super long way to go and then we just have to decide if it's worth the energy that it's gonna take to get us some part of the way there. Neil Sattin: Yeah, I think it's worth it. I totally think it's worth it. Jeff Brown: You do, yeah, well, that's why you're doing this podcast. And I think it's worth it, and I also understand why some people who are carrying too much stuff or have too many practical challenges or don't have enough relational support because there is very little relational support out there for this kind of work, I can understand why they say, "Fuck it, it's not worth it. I'm just gonna have a more practical connection and put my energy somewhere else because the relational field is so challenging." It's all most people can do to manage and identify their own material. To put that two people in a room trying to do that and then weave the dynamic piece together and what comes up in the dynamic, it's extraordinary. Hard, brave, profound, terrifying work. Neil Sattin: Something that I think is ironic, 'cause I'm just pondering like well, why... How did we even end up here in conscious relationship land? And I think that the irony at least as I'm seeing it right now is that, it's the the cultural idea that you can meet someone and they can be your your hero, you can have that love that lasts forever, that engages you in like the practical question of well, how is that really possible? And especially if you're not willing to settle for... Well, my grandparents were together forever but they never had a kind word to say about each other or that sort of thing. Or frequently had an unkind word to say, [chuckle] let's just say it that way. So it's diving into that question around what gets you to the long term that I think takes you out of the common way of experiencing relationship which we center around - like how much dopamine we get from it, how much exhilaration we feel, how romanced we are and it moves us because that in and of itself isn't sustainable. Its sustainable when you merge that with the kind of healing work that you're talking about that takes energy and attention and intention 'cause it doesn't just happen on its own. Jeff Brown: Right. Neil Sattin: I didn't mean to monologue there. [laughter] Jeff Brown: Oh it's no problem. I didn't wanna respond I think what you said was absolutely true. Neil Sattin: So it gets me wondering then, if that's true, from your perspective, how would a partner bring attention to this, to... Like if you're in a relationship and you're caught in, like the first part of your book "An Uncommon Bond", I was frustrated, it was almost like how... Because it's portraying, this aspect of relationship and it... To me it almost felt like how there are all these songs on the radio that I can't even listen to anymore, that used to be themes for my life but now I just... I hear it and it just... I'm kinda like ugh, I don't wanna listen to that. So there's this question, if you know you're in that dynamic what's a pathway? What's a step in the right direction? Especially how do you bring that to your partnership? Jeff Brown: Sorry, define that dynamic? Neil Sattin: If you recognize like "Oh, We're just all over the map and we're getting triggered left and right and what we need to do is actually come to a recognition that what's required is attention and intention on our healing journey as well as our romantic journey. How do I bring that to a partner? Jeff Brown: Well, that depends on the partner. Probably, gently at first but at some point probably very directly. There really isn't a choice. If you're not going to fall back to a survivalist framework for a dynamic. The term "conscious relationship" doesn't work for me 'cause consciousness is so bloody relative, you know? And it implies everybody before was unconscious and like "we're conscious". And I mean, compared to where we're gonna be in 300 years, we're also unconscious. So, I think of it as just getting authentic, an authentic form of relatedness, and I think that every couple decides how far they're gonna go in the direction of authenticity, of getting real with who they are and what lives below the surface and all the stuff that they see flying around in the dynamic and taking it seriously and understanding that it's real. Not looking at it through the lens of ungrounded spirituality which pretends that everything about the personality is unreal, but the ecstatic experience is real, well that's just ungrounded and nonsensical. And not moving in the direction of pragmatism, where you decide to just accept that's just the bullshit of life and you're gonna keep yelling and screaming and abuse each other and keep moving forward. Jeff Brown: But every couple has to decide that, they have to have the conversation, somebody has to have the conversation, and we've all been part of that. I've been part of that conversation when I absolutely and utterly refuse to do the work. And I've been part of the conversation and the experience that initiated bond that then inspired Uncommon Bond, with somebody who absolutely refused to do the work. I had both experiences. At some point you just have to decide, you're either gonna break up, you're gonna embrace survivalism as a way of being, or you're gonna move in the direction of an immoral wakening, and authentic connection. Just initiate the conversation as gently as possible, it will often end up being a shouting match, because somebody very often, this was the experience with the Uncommon Bond studies. One partner wanted to really go forward and deepen into the shadow work and the other one absolutely and utterly refused to. It's rare to find two people who in a dynamic that is super charged and brings up the light in the shadow in really intense ways where both people are absolutely and utterly willing to do the work on the deepest deepest levels. I've encountered very few couples like that in my life. Neil Sattin: Yeah, it's something where I certainly feel blessed when I realize that with my partnership. Jeff Brown: If you got that, you're blessed. But it also means that you're gonna have a... In some ways a very hard path. A beautifully fulfilling path if you guys can see the process all the way through and not stop half way. Neil Sattin: Yeah. There are moments where it's really hard, and then there are moments where it's really beautiful. Jeff Brown: You're doing the work for my Bubbe and Zeda. Of course it's hard. You're doing the work for everybody. Really, that has never been able to do that work, or even be aware of that, existence of that work. It's really amazingly remarkable, couples who do this work really need to just go out and have congratulatory dates and just give themselves a break when they can't quite get it right just because they're doing the work for everybody. Neil Sattin: Yeah. And there's something that's coming to me too around how the container of your relationship is so important too... And establishing that container is often one of the most challenging initial parts of a couple embracing this kind of journey together, is creating the safety that allows them to do that so that, when I look at my own experience, the things that are hard now are still hard but they're not hard in a way where I feel like everything is just gonna potentially fall apart like I did in those initial hard moments. Jeff Brown: Because your container is solid. Neil Sattin: Yeah, Exactly. But it took a lot of work to get there, to the solid container. Jeff Brown: And what would you define as the key elements of that container? Neil Sattin: Key elements of the container. One, well there are the prerequisites to the container, so first is developing your presence and by that I mean an embodied presence. Although I think there are times when a more dissociative mindfulness can be helpul, particularly when you feel your trigger coming up and you're right there with your partner. But for the most part it's the kind of presence that is about really being solidly in your body and knowing what is coming up when you're with your partner. So that's pre-requisite number one. And number two is establishing your communication, the kind of communication that's based on presence and that already has a backdrop of establishing safety. So you're shifting your communication paradigm where you recognize, okay, how we talk to each other about whatever is coming up for us. Like, our mission is to keep each other safe in that conversation. Not that we avoid things to keep each other safe but we bring things up in a context of safety. And if you get knocked off the rails, you figure out how to get back in line. Jeff Brown: Got it. So it can be uncomfortable but not hurtful. Neil Sattin: Exactly. Exactly. Or if you slip and you're hurtful you're like, "Woah! I fucked up. Sorry". Willingness to bring that into your awareness of how you communicate. Jeff Brown: So the capacity for self reflection is very important in this process? Neil Sattin: Exactly. Jeff Brown: Okay. Neil Sattin: Those two things along with a whole bunch of curiosity, I think get you to a place where you can start looking at the container. And that's both in terms of how you close your exits...so that means even seeing what your exits are in your relationship. The way that you put energy elsewhere or leave the relationship... Especially in the hard moments. And then on the flip side of container, it's like imbuing it with the beauty of your vision and what you want and what you crave and what you hope to embody together, or what you wanna amplify that you already have. It's a combination of those two things that I think get you to a place where now you can dive into harder work and that structure holds you. Jeff Brown: And what do you feel... I know I'm turning this around on becoming the podcast questioner...but you have the wealth of experience in it. So how do you feel about the whole question of boundaries in terms of creating a safe container around monogamy versus polyamory. Can this work happen if one or both parties is engaged in the polyamorous lifestyle? Neil Sattin: That's a great question. I think that it really depends on the couple. I have friends who are happily polyamorous. And I've had some clients who are happily polyamorous. But happily polyamorous also includes always being or, I shouldn't say always but very frequently being stimulated in the way that your partner being with someone else brings up your abandonment trauma or your need to be acknowledged or seen or... There are all kind of ways that that can still tap into your deep primal issues around safety. The question in the couple is, are you in agreement around it? And can you... If you're in agreement around what you're doing then you can have conversations that either restore your safety because something did jeopardize it in terms of being polyamorous. Neil Sattin: Or you recognize like, "Oh, what I'm experiencing right now actually isn't about my partner at all. It's this deep issue that I've held within me that has no relationship to my partner except that they're stimulating it right now. And I'm gonna deal with that." That being said for myself and for a lot of people, the path of monogamy focuses energy in a way that I think is just... It's different. And I'm coming from a place too where I have two young kids and honestly, I can't imagine having the time to deal with all of that. I'm gonna do this conscious relationship thing but with more people in the mix. It seems on a practical level really challenging. Jeff Brown: Yup. Neil Sattin: And opening up to challenges. All the challenges around... And you brought up the word boundaries so maybe we re-visit that in a moment. But I think it introduces a set of challenges that create amazing growth. But that is not the growth that I personally choose. Jeff Brown: Yup. I think it really depends on where you're wanting to go. And I think if you're wanting to go to the place of trying to explore and possibly develop the capacity to sustain the most profoundly inclusive kind of love experience. One that opens the portal to the everything, one that explores the portal to the everything, that it cannot happen in a polyamorous union. What I think they're exploring is more a preliminary stage work which for many of us is absolutely and utterly necessary. But I think because of the collective carry forward in terms of abandonment, betrayal and jealousy material, that you absolutely have to have a monogamous container if you're wanting to go all the way. Whether that'll be true in a thousand years, once we clear some of this debris, I don't know. Although I suspect it will be. I feel like what's happening in the poly-community is, apart from the whole self avoiding aspect of that for many of them, which is shrouded in all kinds of spiritual fancy talk. I just think they're not going to the same place because I don't believe humans can hold that portal open, that most profound deeply vulnerable portal open unless there's a monogamous container. Neil Sattin: I think there's also a biological shift that is part of evolving a monogamous relationship. The way that the dopamine pathways in your body start to change where polyamory could potentially be counterproductive to that because... Well, here's where I come at it from. There are a lot of clients that I work with where their relationship has grown stale and what they long for, they think, is the rush of how it felt to meet and to be romanced and to have that huge sexual charge that I would say most people, not all but most people do experience in the beginning of relationship when they connect with someone. And they long for that and it's not there. And the challenge that I think... And so those people often come to me and say, "Do you think we should open up our marriage, so that we can get some more of that spark happening?". Jeff Brown: No, they should enreal themselves and enreal their dynamic and go deeper and clear the debris so that when they connect sexually, they're actually present in a way that they never were able to be in the beginning. Neil Sattin: Yeah, so let's go there. Talk about enrealment. Jeff Brown: That's my bias. Right? And I'm just writing a chapter about it in my new book and yeah, I just think that it's very easy to go to staleness and then go to spark, staleness, spark, staleness, spark. It's a life, right? It's a way of life but they need to at least have one experience of their lifetime of trying to go deeper into the shadow material together, clear the debris and develop a container or capacity, an experience of intimacy that's quite a bit different than the one that happens in the beginning when you don't really know one another. You don't know one another's shadow. For whatever reason we're transported to a place where we bypass that or crack through that or avoid that, whatever we're doing. But I think to move to the next place where you're actually deeply seeing of the other on every level. And if you're doing the work together loving them, devotionally, beautifully 'cause you have so much regard for the courage that they bring to the moment to moment experience of the connection doing that work, I think that the intimacy just starts to flow from a completely different place. Neil Sattin: Yeah. Jeff Brown: But because there was no space to do that work and there's no modeling for doing that work and there are no love elders out there who can really support us in doing that work, we're at the beginning of that journey, it's easy to understand why they go back to spark because something's alive because the other spark, the spark I'm describing is the more sustainable depth-full integrated embodied woven spark that travels through us on every level. And to get there as you know, you have to do all the individual work to be able to be integrated and woven best between mind and body and all your aspects as an individual. It's so much work to get to that stage. You understand why they run away and go to spark again. But I think now we're having this conversation because we're at the beginning of trying to lay down the framework for how we go back to a different kind of spark while staying inside of the same union and beautiful but... Neil Sattin: Yeah, there's a reason we're having this conversation and... Jeff Brown: Yeah. Neil Sattin: There's a reason you're listening to this conversation and I invite you, if you're listening and you're poly, from my perspective, I'm in no way gonna say, "Oh, you can't experience transcending conscious polyamorous relationship". I just invite you to examine the dynamics that are at work and see if that's what's happening or not. Jeff Brown: Well you can have all kinds of extraordinary experiences. I mean, for a lot of people and it may be true for most of us at this stage of human development, not really individually prepared for the kind of work required by one monogamous connection. The poly's the path to gather information about who we are from various types of dynamics, to explore different portals, how different connections bring out different parts of us is beautiful, magnificent. Don't misunderstand me but if we're wanting to go all the way through to that uncommon bond experience sustainably, that's what I was saying, I don't think we can do it in that form. Can I ask you a question Neil? Neil Sattin: Of course. Jeff Brown: You mentioned earlier, you were talking about this idea that maybe what we need to do is do this groundwork, the shadow work, the working through the material work in order to have a more real experience or a more truly sustainable experience of say, great love. Right? Neil Sattin: Yes. Jeff Brown: When you ask that question, then I ask the question to myself, where does this sort of thing that just exists between two... 'Cause when I hear that I think well you can throw any two people into an elevator and if they both have the willingness to do the work, we're assuming that they can go to that place. And I'm not sure that's true because I do think there has to be something that exists between the two people. And I always ask myself, what is that thing that needs to exist between the two people? Because it can't just be any two people. At least it's my experience it can't be. And what I came up with when I was writing the Uncommon Bond was fascination or what you may call curiosity. That with some people you just have this intrinsic fascination about this. So let me read you a quote. I'm interested to hear what your experience of this is. Neil Sattin: Great. Jeff Brown: You can connect from all kinds of places. Energetic harmony, sexual alchemy, intellectual alignment, but they won't sustain love over a lifetime. You need a thread that goes deeper. That moves below and beyond the shifting sands of compatibility. That thread is fascination. A genuine fascination with someone's inner-world. With the way they organize reality, with the way they articulate their feelings, with the unfathomable and bottomless depths of their being. To hear their soul cry out to you again and again and to never lose interest in what it is trying to convey. If there is that, then there will still be love when the body sickens, when the sexuality fades, when the perfection projection is long shattered. If there is that, you will swim in love's waters until the very last breath. So that's from an Uncommon Bond. How do you feel about that? Does that feel true? Or do you feel as though sustaining fascination with another's inner-world for a life time is unrealistic? Neil Sattin: Well I remember reading that and actually doing the translation... The way I translated that was curiosity. Or and now that I think about it even more, it's like, the word that comes to me is willingness... And part of that maybe involves the will because sometimes it is an act of will to bring yourself back and to remind yourself that there is a reason that I'm here. But what I also like about willing is that it implies for me, some vulnerability and openness. And that to me, leads to the curiosity. So it may be that and I'm just... This is just what's coming to me right here in this moment, I think it's true though especially that you'll do a different dance at different times. You're not gonna tango from now until the end of time although if you're Sue Johnson maybe you will do that cause she's really into the tango but I think that you are... There are moments where you are in your sexual realm together. There are moments where you're in your emotional realms, there are moments when you're in your intellectual realms, there are moments when all of those things intertwine and yes there are moments that will challenge us around illness, or if not... Between in you or in your partner, could be in a loved one or the way that what's unfolding in the world affects us. Jeff Brown: You're right. Neil Sattin: Things that require us to be called back to... Oh wow yeah there's something even deeper than that, that springs out for me and [chuckle] you know people who... You've been listening to this show for a while then you know I'm kind of a mystical guy so I'm really glad we're having this conversation Jeff, cause it allows me to go there. Jeff Brown: But Neil, let me ask this. Neil Sattin: Yeah. Jeff Brown: I guess what I'm asking is apart from the safe container, apart from my view that to go all the way to that most expansive thing monogamy is required, which many people won't agree with. I'm already ready to receive the emails of disagreement. [chuckle] Jeff Brown: But... And that's fine, I'm open to that. But apart from all of those things that we put in place to hold it safe so we can do the work, whether it's in monogamy or in polyamory, whatever it is, does there have to be some fundamental spark or some soul essential feeling, forget love at first sight 'cause it doesn't have to happen in at moment but does something have to exist, some kind of energetic or soululer or karmic or cosmic charge that just some thing that pulls two people together that they feel like they're meant specifically to be doing this hard ass work together? Neil Sattin: So, I think I missed your question initially, which was kind of like... Jeff Brown: Not two people in an elevator... Neil Sattin: Right, right. Jeff Brown: Not just two people in an elevator, who make all these agreements but they don't have that thing or does that thing not really matter if you do this work with any other person, what about chemistry or what I call "karmistry" or "karmastry", I mean it's multi-languaging but what about that piece, where is that piece in all of it? Neil Sattin: Yeah well then the question comes up for me like what led those two people to be in the elevator at the same time in that moment? [chuckle] Jeff Brown: And my answer is one of them works on the 11th floor and one of them works on the 8th floor. [chuckle] Jeff Brown: But anyway... Neil Sattin: Exactly. What led to that and what led to that? That's where I get my mind blown on occasion when I think about how circumstances lead to where we exist... Jeff Brown: But what about attraction, Neil? Clearly they're on the elevator... I'll go with you... They're on the elevator together for some reason, it was all destined, it was encoded, it was all... Fine. That doesn't mean they are supposed to be intimate partners. So where does attraction, where does... Neil Sattin: Agreed. Jeff Brown: The organic attraction fit into all of it? And where does attraction come from, in fact? Neil Sattin: Yeah... Jeff Brown: That's a whole other show, I'm sure. Neil Sattin: It is, in fact I was just thinking, wow we just had our 100th episode with John Gottman and Sue Johnson. It was totally focused on attraction and even their take on attraction was just their take on attraction. Jeff Brown: Right. Neil Sattin: Yeah, I... Okay so I harbor the thought that it's possible that if two random people on an elevator really opened their hearts that they might experience the attraction or the spark that I think is necessary for it to lead to this, to create the energy that sends two people off in this direction. They had one trajectory or they each had their own trajectory and it takes a little extra energy coming into the system to send their trajectories off in parallel or intertwined directions. So yeah, I think it's necessary and at the same time, there are people who are convinced that they've lost the spark with a partner and rediscover it. And how different is that from two people who just aren't open to the spark with each other but they could be? I'm not sure, I would love to do that study. [chuckle] Jeff Brown: You have a powerful mind Mr. Sattin. These are all good questions. To me, the important thing is that we keep the inquiry open at this stage. I don't think most of us know much of anything, and I might include myself in that. But these are the right questions to ask, what is the basis for attraction? What are we moving from? Is it just societal conditioning? Is there something karmic and internal that really knows this is one of the beings we're here to encounter? And then the next question, is this somebody who we're supposed to do a short amount of work with or appear at a time as part of the journey, Or is this the person we're supposed to do decades and decades of work with? And how do we distinguish the two? Neil Sattin: Yeah. How do we? Do you have a thought on that? Jeff Brown: I have all kinds of thoughts on that but I don't have a definite answer. I do think there's something to be said for a knowing. And that we have to be careful, we have to have gone through enough in our own experiences to know the difference between sort of an immature knowing and one that's really a seasoned knowing, like an informed innocence rather than just a naïve innocence. And you do enough work and you've had enough experiences and you've learned enough lessons and been through enough disappointments that you do reach a stage where it's clear and clearer, where it's sustainable and where it just... For me, when I had the initiating Uncommon Bond experience, I couldn't imagine, it was unbearable to imagine that that was only there for a short period of time. Impossible. Jeff Brown: I couldn't even hold that in my consciousness for more than it is, it was too painful. And it didn't make an ounce of sense to me because based on my experience, my limited experience with crack open love and my societal conditioning, if you had that kind of experience, of course you were supposed to marry and have children together. The only possibility that made any sense. Jeff Brown: Now having been down the road a little longer and written a book about these processes, I can very safely and clearly say that I was absolutely not supposed to spend my life with her. No way. No how. Not possible, that's not what that was about. But you only know that by living. Neil Sattin: Yeah. And I love how you address that in the book too. The rush to... Like, "Okay, now it's marriage". And then it's babies and it's like there is something in us that wants to... I don't know what that is, I think you say, control, it's about controlling that experience to make it last. Jeff Brown: Well, it is and it's also not being trained to know what to do with that amount of feeling so it wants to move somewhere, it wants to express itself in other forms and some people make the mistake of thinking that form has to be marriage and family life, which is not always true for every dynamic and... Neil Sattin: Yeah. Jeff Brown: Because when that feeling comes and you haven't had an experience, an uncommon bond experience, very few people have had that experience. It's all you can do to figure out where to send that energy because you're just not trained in the art of holding it. Neil Sattin: Yeah, yeah. There is one passage that I actually dog-eared here in my book that I wanted to read 'cause I think it speaks to what we're talking about, which is, may I? Jeff Brown: Yeah, of course. Neil Sattin: Quoting Jeff Brown. "You don't measure love in time, you measure love in transformation. Sometimes the longest connections yield very little growth while the briefest of encounters change everything". Maybe two people in an elevator, that's not in the book. "The heart doesn't wear a watch, it's timeless. It doesn't care how long you know someone, it doesn't care if you had a 40 year anniversary, if there is no juice in the connection. What the heart cares about is resonance. Resonance that opens it, resonance that enlivens it, resonance that calls it home and when it finds it, the transformation begins. Jeff Brown: Somebody made that into a song, he had a singer sing that. I love the song version of that piece. And how do you feel about that piece? Neil Sattin: I hate it. No, just kidding. Jeff Brown: Yeah. I hate it a little too sometimes. [chuckle] Neil Sattin: Well, it has that... There's the potential, right? Of just being, "Oh, you know, it was meant to be" or this is the silver lining talking. I'm just gonna say this... I had to grow from this and it was only meant to be, whatever. I spoke those words a lot when Chloe and I were going through our break up. Break ups, I should say 'cause it happened several times. I guess, this is what was meant to be and I guess this is what I was supposed to learn. But on a deeper level, the way that that speaks to me, is less about the time element of it and more about the resonance, the way that it brings our attention to how do we foster resonance. That's, I think, so key to the longevity of a connection, is your ability to foster it and I think that is through what we were talking about at the very beginning which is, how do you embrace your embodiment? How do you bring yourself right back into your body in the way that it and your partners bodies and experiences vibrate in resonance with each other and where they don't and how do you address that with each other? Jeff Brown: And the absolute necessity of it. If you're just gonna do the transcendence bypass together, you're gonna be crashing down to earth pretty hard and harsh, right? You absolutely have to bring everything back into the body and we know what happens when we open the lines in the body, you don't have to do a bio energetic session with Al Lowen to know that it's gonna break everything up that's held within the container. This is the work right here and you're doing this work and this is the work that John Welwood's been writing about. Steven and Ondrea Levine have been writing about for years. Gay and Kathlyn Hendricks have been writing about for years, which is what we do when we come back down to earth. And how willing are we to do the work to get back into our bodies and deal with what lives inside of us? Jeff Brown: At this stage of human development, resonance is... We need resonance in order to be... Feel the energy or the willingness or the hopefulness to go back into the shadow and do the work and hope that there is something in that connection that will still be there or even more deeply there later. But what we need more than anything are models and blueprints for what relational consciousness looks like and how we deepen it and how we sustain it and what has to be cleared through. This is the work of our lives and I'm fairly convinced that if we keep focusing on individual path, whether it's economically, as an economic accumulator or master of the economic realm or spiritually, individual practice and the meditation as road to God, that we are going to take ourselves farther and farther in the direction of the destroying this planet, 'cause we're not aware of anything horizontally outside of ourselves. And we're not going to know this realm of possibilities that exist between us. The profound realms of possibilities that exist between us, we have to develop blueprints for doing this shadow work and for knowing what embodied presence feels like and knowing how to hold to it and sustain it without running away from one each other in dynamics and that's the work right now that has to be developed. Neil Sattin: One thing I loved about and An Uncommon Bond was how it transformed from something that was really frustrating me, into a healing journey and so much in the middle towards the end part of the book is about the healing path and how important that is. Jeff Brown: Because Lowen had a choice - as did the author who was inspired to write the book. Either go back to armor and see the ending of the connection as more evidence of how impossible love is in this world and God knows we all have experiences that would fortify or support that belief or, and I remember the moment of my own experience when I had to decide, am I gonna walk away from this and close down and just stay shut down for good or am I gonna somehow find a way to walk right into that web of pain and try to find my way to love that experience forward in some other way in my life. And that's the moment of decision we make as individuals in a breakup and that's the moment of decision we make in a dynamic when the connection gets difficult. Neil Sattin: And for you, where did you find the courage to make that choice? Jeff Brown: It just didn't make sense to me, Neil. That... I guess I'm just not cynical enough or something. It just didn't make sense to me that this experience which seemed so... On so many levels, things happened that I didn't even put in the book that any normal person in the world would think that I'm insane to describe them, as true. Things happened that were radical. It's like we entered another realm and all kinds of things happened that never happen otherwise. And, it just didn't make sense to me that all of that could have happened just for me to spend my life suffering. There had to be some positive reason for this. And you know, I had beautiful grandparents who kept bringing me back to the light in my life, despite my difficult and challenging parents and they had something to do with that. I had enough of an experience with the light to know that there was some possibility that this was intended to take me to the light in a way that I could not possibly foresee in the heart of the darkness. I just believed it, I leaned towards that maybe 53% versus 47% in the other direction, that was enough. Neil Sattin: The word that I didn't speak when I was mis-answering your question before was, there's a lot of faith and you could call it belief or you could call it faith but... Jeff Brown: I had great faith. And I have great faith in humanity and I always, despite Donald Trump. I still have great faith in humanity. Neil Sattin: Me too, me too. Jeff I'm wondering if you can just tell us a little bit about what you're working on now and how people can find you and find more out about you? Jeff Brown: I'm writing, probably my last long book, a book about spirituality where I challenge through my own journey on grounded spiritualities, things that we've talked about a bit here and I make an effort to try to craft a model or a framework or more relational inclusive grounded framework going forward. So I'm hoping to have that book out in the Fall of '18. I'm continuing to publish other authors through Enrealment Press, you can see our books at enrealment.com. We just published Andrew Harvey and Chris Saade's book "Evolutionary Love Relationships" which I think you would love. Neil Sattin: Yeah. He was on the show to talk about it, actually. Jeff Brown: Oh. He was. Okay, great. And I'm teaching at Soulshaping Institute. I'm gonna develop that quite a bit more after the book is done and they can find me at soulshaping.com as my main website or on my fan page on Facebook. Neil Sattin: Great. And I'm reminded too of your movie that you did which I haven't seen yet. I watched a few trailers and excerpts from it. It looks like it's fascinating. But it's about this question of spirituality and... Jeff Brown: Yeah. And what is... It really, that is the question and it weaves the personal into it as the movie proceeds. It's a very intense watch. Definitely wear a tin foil hat while watching. But it does endeavor to speak to through the journey, this question of "What is real spirituality? Grounded spirituality? And what is dissociative spirituality?" I mean, that's really at the heart of the film. Neil Sattin: Well, Jeff Brown, thank you so much for your time today and I feel like we could easily just talk for another hour which I'd love to do. But I know that you have commitments and I have commitments too. But that being said, I hope that we can chat again. Jeff Brown: Great. Neil Sattin: For the podcast. And if anything has come up for you listening, reach out. You can get in touch with Jeff through his website. You can always reach me, neilius, N-E-I-L-I-U-S, @neilsattin.com. And if you want the show guide that summarizes this conversation and along with takeaways, you again can visit neilsattin.com/soulshaping or text the word "Passion" to the number, 33444, follow the instructions and we'll get the show guide to you. Thanks again Jeff. Jeff Brown: Thanks Neil Sponsors: Zola.com - a free, easy-to-use website that offers you the chance to create a custom wedding registry that represents YOU. Choose from over 500 brands and over 50,000 gifts and experiences, allow your guests to pitch in together on big gifts that will have an impact on your life, or to simply donate cash towards your honeymoon, house downpayment, etc. Zola is offering a $50 credit towards your registry if you visit https://www.zola.com/alive and get your registry started. Talkspace.com - Online therapy that matches you with your perfect therapist. You can communicate with your therapist daily - so they can be there for you during the moments you most need support. Visit talkspace.com/ALIVE and use the coupon code “ALIVE” for $30 off your first month of online therapy. Resources: Check out Jeff Brown's website Read Jeff’s book An Uncommon Bond www.neilsattin.com/soulshaping Visit to download the show guide, or text “PASSION” to 33444 and follow the instructions to download the transcript to this episode with Jeff Brown Our Relationship Alive Community on Facebook Amazing intro/outro music graciously provided courtesy of: The Railsplitters - Check them Out

In this episode, we tackle spirituality and relationships with soulshaping mentor Jeff Brown. Jeff has a great knack for calling BS on the spiritual movement and instead offering grounded, practical, embodied suggestions and pathways to continue to deepen into our wholeness. This one may get uncomfortable depending on where you fall in this conversation. It is my wish that you feel challenged and grow from it.   SHOWNOTES What is Soulshaping? [12:40] What are the most common human struggles that Jeff sees in his work? [14:00] Why most people meditate and so “solo spirituality” over relationships. [16:30] Jeff’s personal definition of spirituality [18:00] How are some teachings distorting the ideas of spirituality and emotions? [19:30] What can men do to grow spiritually? [24:00] The lesson Jeff learned from selling windows door-to-door. [27:00] How can women help men awaken? [29:30] How do Jeff and partner navigate conflict in their relationship? [32:45] Jeff gives his opinion on polyamory. [38:00] What are Jeff’s preferred practices for personal growth? [39:45] Jeff’s twist on the New Age movement. [43:00] Why are relationships so hard? [46:00]  

Jeff Brown did all the things he was supposed to do to become successful in the eyes of the world. It had been Jeff's lifelong dream to practice criminal law and search for the truth in the courtroom. But then, on the verge of opening a law practice, he heard a little voice inside telling him to stop, just stop. With great difficulty, he honored this voice and began a heartfelt quest for the truth that lived within him. Although he didn't realize it at the time, Jeff was actually questing for his innate image, the essential being that he came into this lifetime to embody. He was searching for his authentic face. After publishing his first book, writing a series of inspirations for ABC'S ‘Good Morning America' in early 2010, and appearing on Fox News.com and dozens of radio shows, Jeff's viral blog "Apologies to the Divine Feminine," catapulted him to greater notoriety. Soon thereafter, he released his first film – Karmageddon - an award winning spiritual documentary that highlights his journey with spiritual teacher Bhagavan Das. Jeff is the author of three books, Soulshaping: A Journey of Self-Creation, Ascending with Both Feet on the Ground, and Love It Forward. He has appeared on numerous TV and radio interviews and his works have been printed in many publications.  Visit www.soulshaping.com Get the OFF TO WORK CD by Sister Jenna  Like America Meditating on Facebook and Follow us on Twitter

Born in Toronto, Canada, Jeff Brown did all the things he was supposed to do to become successful in the eyes of the world. He was on the Dean’s Honor List as an undergraduate. He won the Law and Medicine prize in law school. He apprenticed with top criminal lawyer Eddie Greenspan. It had been Brown’s lifelong dream to practice criminal law and search for the truth in the courtroom. But then, on the verge of opening a law practice, he heard a little voice inside telling him to stop, just stop. With great difficulty, he honored this voice and began a heartfelt quest for the truth that lived within him. Although he didn’t realize it at the time, Brown was actually questing for his innate image, the essential being that he came into this lifetime to embody. He was searching for his authentic face. As part of his journey, Brown surrendered to his confusion and explored many possible paths. He studied Bioenergetics and did session work with co-founder Alexander Lowen. He practiced as a body-centered psychotherapist. He completed an MA in Psychology at Saybrook Graduate School in San Francisco and co-founded the Open Heart Gang, a benevolent gang with a heartfelt intention. He started his own business and became a successful entrepreneur. ------------------------------------------- Laurie Huston is a Professional & Intuitive Counselor. Her professional qualifications include a Bachelor’s degree in Social Work and Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP). She has been on her spiritual path for the past 18 years and during that time has acquired through extensive studies and teachings over 25 different healing modalities.

We've all heard the saying, "Pay it Forward". How about "Love it Forward?" Yes, that's right, "Love it Forward - benevolent intentionality and unity consciousness!" Jeff Brown of Soulshaping, and founder of the Love in Action movement, joins me for this edition of Soulful Living on Empower Radio.

A former criminal lawyer and psychotherapist, Jeff Brown is the author of "Soulshaping: A Journey of Self-Creation," recently published by North Atlantic Books. Endorsed by authors Elizabeth Lesser and Ram Dass, "Soulshaping" is Brown's autobiography — an inner travelogue of his journey from archetypal male warrior to a more surrendered path. He is also the author of the soon to be released quotes book 'Ascending with both feet on the Ground' and the co-producer and key journeyor in the soon to be released spiritual documentary 'Karmageddon'. The film relates to spiritual teacher Bhagavan Das, and includes unforgettable interviews with Ram Dass, Seane Corn, Deva Premal, Wah, David Life and Robert Gass. You can connect with Jeff's work at www.soulshaping.com

This is a rebroadcast from a private recording I did yesterday with Jeff Brown, the Author of Soulshaping: A Journey of Self-Creation. Jeff shared many insights with me regarding the path of self-creation.  To learn more about my guest please visit his web-site at: http://www.soulshaping.com

Have you ever felt you've been on a journey of self discovery and soul searching? Have you felt a calling to do something different than what is expected of you? Well my guest today Jeff brown been there. He has been on a journey of self creation that led him to write his incredible book “SOULSHAPPING” he is here to inspire you and to take you on soul journey to self- creation. In his book he shares his path of self growth and self-transformation. It is a must read book. http:// WWW.SOULSHAPING.COM http://www.CoachingByRea.com

"Soulshaping: A Journey of Self-Creation," is Jeff Brown's autobiography - an inner travelogue of his journey from archetypal male warrior to a more surrendered path.

"Soulshaping: A Journey of Self-Creation," is Jeff Brown's autobiography - an inner travelogue of his journey from archetypal male warrior to a more surrendered path.

The true story of a criminal lawyer called to a more heartfelt path, Soulshaping is every person's journey from self-alienation to soul-satisfaction in the heart of modern life. That journey is all about the inner: the inner world, the inner wild, the inner break for freedom from the shackles of shame, fear and misidentification. Soulshaping is a no-nonsense inner travelogue that inspires us to do the real work of excavating and honoring who we really are, before our opportunity passes. It is a call to question the misguided self-concepts that are fed to us by the outer world, and to faithfully begin our own private revolution–a revolution of the spirit. Soulshaping presents a new and distinctly human paradigm for expanding our consciousness: Ascending with both feet on the ground. This paradigm is rooted in the reality of our daily lives, and makes no distinction between our spiritual quest and our emotional life. Our feelings, our unresolved issues and life experiences, are the grist for the soul mill that takes us higher. Rather than looking for the answers outside of ourselves, we choose to look inside, in our often ignored bodies of wisdom. At times funny, at times profound, Soulshaping will meet you where you live and where you long to live. It is a vulnerable, grounded, original, and beautifully written account of the inner treasure hunt that awaits us all, if we so choose. A journey of courageous self-creation, it is for anyone who has heard a whisper of something truer calling out to them amid the distractions of modern life. It is for anyone getting ready to take flight who needs an inspired push. www.soulshaping.com

Jeff Brown - author of Soulshaping on how to follow your calling.

Back by popular demand, Jeff Brown share news insights of his personal journey of his own Soul Shaping. Great Show!

Jeff Brown, laywer, author and spiritual advisor discusses his personal journey of discovery and his awakening to his soul's journey. Find out how you too can determine your soul's purpose.

Join Julie as she talks with Jeff Brown author of "Soulshaping: Adventures in Self-Creation." From a criminal trial lawyer to a more surrendered path, Jeff takes listeners through psychological, spiritual and practical terrain. A real eye opener!