Stay Bright

This week we continue reviewing James Clear’s book, Atomic Habits, and learn what a habit is as well as the fundamental parts of a habit. We then explore the science of how a habit works so we can begin to improve our habits. “Habits reduce cognitive load and free up mental capacity, so you can allocate your attention to other tasks.” Sounds exciting, right? Understand the steps that establish a habit pattern - cue, craving, response, reward- the backbone of every habit, and learn a practical framework we can begin using immediately to design good habits and eliminate bad ones. We’ll look at what Clear calls, The Four Laws of Behavior Change, a simple set of “rules” we can adopt for developing better habits. We’ll demonstrate how habits do not restrict freedom, they create it.

In this bonus episode, Angie reviews the book Atomic Habits by James Clear. She’ll share two concepts that will turn everything you thought you knew about personal development on its head! Learn why we need to worry less about big goals and more about small processes and plans. Take a closer look at what you really believe about yourself and how your identity affects your ability to change. Gain the confidence you need to uproot old beliefs and cast some votes for the person you really want to be. Get ready to celebrate tiny improvements over time to realize big results. You can do this!

You’ve got this mama! And we’re with you! Join us this week for a special episode in which Angie shares four spiritual truths that not only encourage and empower us as mothers, but remind us that we have heavenly aid to assist us through life’s most important job. We’ll expand on the eternal power and influence just one mother and one child can have on generations of posterity. How can that ripple effect give us the daily strength we need to give our all where it counts?Next, we’ll share some stories related to Joseph F. Smith’s teachings about how family and loved ones beyond the veil are ministering angels to help us through our toughest times. Be reminded that no matter what, we never mother alone. Take courage that even in mothering, wrongs can be righted as we invite Heavenly Father to be a second pair of arms to assist us and rely on the atonement of Jesus Christ to heal and refine us as we mother. Then, take a moment to ponder the divine instincts Richard G. Scott teaches about, to help us sense our children’s special talents and unique capabilities. How can this spiritual awareness hone our nurturing so that our children will grow strong?

This week, Kristy draws on her own experience and the experiences of dear friends to talk about honest motherhood. She’ll share four assets of encouragement to help us thrive through the highs and lows of being a mom. We’ll share simple ideas to help win the hearts of our kids through easy to do traditions and talk about how to meld and mold their memories so that even if we screw up, they’ll still look back on their lives with a smile!Then, we’ll touch on how we can help confirm and grow our kids’ confidence through trust and stepping back. So hard to do sometimes, but so worth it! Wrap up our discussion with some ideas on how to nurture and give ourselves the time and maintenance we need to do our life’s most important work of mothering. Listen in and share with a mom who needs this message!

Take a leap with us this week! Sometimes faith can feel like a risk because it asks us to walk to the edge of the light and then a few steps into the dark. Most of us don’t like the feeling of the unknown! It can even feel paralyzing. We’ll learn how NOT knowing exactly what to do next can be an opportunity to exercise faith. How can we overcome that stuck feeling and awaken our faith into a principle of action? We’ll quiet our fears in the face of trials by taking a closer look at the ways our Heavenly Father has prepared us to overcome and has already prepared a way for us. Get ready to turn fear and caution into trust and confidence to move forward in faith!

This week on the podcast, Kristy shares some research based principles around risk taking that will help us understand not only our personal tolerance for risk, but also will help us better understand the people we care about. Learn to distinguish the difference between decision making and risk taking by assessing the severity of possible outcomes. Improve your risk management by looking at how your history, upbringing and social context may influence your ability to wisely take risks. Can this be improved on, or are we built a certain way that doesn’t easily change? How can knowing the social context of ourselves and others improve understanding and even relationships?Could risk taking be part of protecting a valued identity? And if so, could this help explain the dare-devils and the nervous Nelly’s in our lives?Join us and strengthen your risk taking strategies through a better understanding of yourself and others!RESOURCES AND REFERENCES: 1. The meaning of risk taking: key concepts and dimensions2. The impact of life experiences on risk taking3. Determinants of risk taking: Behavioral and economic views4. When taking risks is the best strategy

Have you ever stopped to wonder why God sent you to earth in your body? What is the purpose of experiencing mortality in these temples of flesh? In the fourth and final episode of our installment on physical health, Angie and Kristy go beyond the “how” of caring for our bodies to the spiritual “why.” We’ll share stories that teach how our bodies can be the vehicle to gain godly traits. Learn what it means to “glorify God in your body” as the scriptures teach. Come closer to reaching the full measure of your creation by coming to terms with the time and work it takes to create the health you’ll need to do it! And calm your mind and body with our simple three step philosophy for physical health. Take a deep breath, join us, and see what you’ll discover about yourself!

On the podcast this week, Kristy and Angie share two additional inspirations for improving our physical health. We discuss how physical symptoms of pains, ailments, and illnesses (digestive issues, skin problem, restless sleep, anxiety and so on) can be indicators of deficiencies in macronutrients and micronutrients such as vitamins, minerals, and antioxidants. Come join in the conversation and listen to Kristy’s personal story of healing. Learn about each of our cell’s specific functions and understand how to help our bodies operate properly on a cellular level so that we can repair damage and prevent illness and disease. Make connections between proteins and amino acids and discover how to heal our bodies. Begin to make improvements to your physical health today! RESOURCES AND REFERENCES: 1. What is DNA? By Stated Clearly 2. Antioxidants and Free Radicals 3. Medical Medium Cleanse to Heal by Anthony William

In this episode:Jill touches on her three non-negotiables: balanced sleep, whole foods and movement. She teaches how even a beginner can use these foundation stones to make small changes toward better health. Jill offers guidance on how to add good habits to our existing routines through the stacking method and reveals her number one inspiring resource for changing our habits. Jill also gets personal and shares how six years ago, after struggling with extreme anxiety, she had an aha moment that prompted her to finally do the joyful work of taking care of herself. We’ll talk about the difference between discipline and motivation, where she sees people get hung up when trying to create a healthy lifestyle, eating in season and much more!Join this enlightening discussion to gain new motivation to care for your body from a whole new perspective of eat to move vs. diet and exercise. You don’t want to miss this wealth of information!Nourish by Jill Nourish by Jill InstagramNOTES: Final 12 minutes of episode (Nutritional Coach Jill Thompson) There is a difference between Dieting and Exercising vs Eating and Training. When we eat and train, we think of food and movement differently. When we are training we are working toward something that we want to achieve and it becomes exciting and exhilarating, marking progress because we have a purpose, we have a why. With eating, we will want to eat properly because we want to feel good to train. Have a goal! Senior olympics, a mountain we want to climb, a bike ride we'd like to do. We can have our sights set on longevity and living a really healthy lifestyle that allows us to do the things we want to do. Having goals that are small or big, will give us something to work towards, to train for. Food as fuel- what are we fueling our bodies for? What is our goal? What are we training for? As we age, especially as women, we lose muscle mass. Past 30 years old, we lose 3-5% muscle mass per decade. We need to move more and sit less. Jill knows women who are afraid to bulk, but we need not be afraid of building a little muscle because muscle mass is a huge determiner for: metabolic rate, ability to take in and use glucose, balance, coordination, injury prevention, aging, improving your mood, bone density, cognitive abilities, and more. Adults today, BASELINE, need 150 minutes of aerobic activity per week plus muscle strengthening at least 2x per week. Help women understand how their health and wellness journey can start and can get momentum and how they can start to thrive in their own bodies. Develop a sense of gratitude each and every day. Show gratitude for the food that we have, the ability to eat, commune with others. Eat MORE fruit and vegetables. Make fruits and vegetables the all stars of your meals. And move, every single day, just get up and do something, just start! Let discipline be the thing that happens, not motivation, don't wait for it. Movement is your medicine and it will help you in every single aspect of your life. RESOURCES AND REFERENCES: 1. In Defense of Food by Michael Pollan2. Seasonal Food Guide3. Atomic Habits by James Clear

This week on the Stay Bright podcast, Kristy and Angie begin a 4-week journey about physical health beginning with learning about food as fuel. Based on Michael Pollan's adage, "Eat real food, not too much of it, mostly plants" we begin to break down some essentials to have what we put into our bodies really work for us: work to heal us, work to give us energy, work to sustain our active lifestyles, and so on. We learn how to and why it's best to make choices for REAL food, how to coach ourselves to eat the right amount, and why adding more plants to our diet is imperative for successfully optimizing our physical health. Come learn and gain principles to share with your own family and friends so we can help each other understand our human body and feel better! RESOURCES AND REFERENCES:

After a positive COVID test and an unusually challenging week for both hosts, Kristy and Angie break from the usual Stay Bright format with some unscripted real talk about how to get through this rapidly changing pandemic world. Kristy shares five things to help high achievers reconcile the new struggles many haven’t previously had like depression, lack of motivation and decreased productivity. Angie shares how she overcomes mom-guilt when she needs to take a break or ask for help, and Kristy gives encouragement on how to nourish our bodies, spirits and minds with good food and self care. Listen in and refuel with us!

Buckle up! This isn’t our typical Stay Bright episode! How well can we spot the snares of moral relativism? In this segment, we’ll reveal three warnings we need to identify in order to steer clear of worldly traps that can harm us. We’ll learn about the scriptural significance of salt and how it relates to our moral potency and effectiveness and then discover how powerful the savor of just one soul can be in effecting others. Then, we’ll take our own temperature to gauge our standing with the three “D’s”: Diluting, Downplaying and Denial. We’ll strengthen our faith and resolve to stand fast in turbulent modern times by having an honest assessment of where we really stand today. RESOURCES AND REFERENCES: Stand as Witnesses of God by Dallin H. Oaks

With so many philosophies about what is right and wrong, we can find ourselves pushing the line. Things can become hazy, unclear, confusing or even scary. In this episode, Kristy approaches moral relativism through the talk Free to Act For Themselves by D. Todd Christofferson. We’ll start from the base that we have the principal decision-making role for our lives and talk about four ideas that help us decide what compels us to live within a moral code and what we will base those decisions on. Learn how to discover truth and obey, influence others for good and even how to love others even if their code directly opposes ours. Find joy and freedom through applying truth instead of resisting it. Listen in and join the conversation!RESOURCES AND REFERENCES :1. Free Forever to Act for Themselves by Todd Christofferson2. Explaining Away Responsibility

“While the body may reach the peak of its maturation in a few years, the development of the spirit may never reach the limit of its capacity, because there is no end to progression.” Russel M. NelsonThis week, Angie teaches about a personal hero, Gordon B. Hinkley through the lens of Russel M. Nelson. She shares what the prophet has observed about growing our spiritual capacity from the example of President Hinkley. Learn how the power of personal interests and passions can enrich our souls, how curiosity can expand our experiences, the role of the Holy Ghost in our learning and a super tool to help us master our gifts and talents! RESOURCES AND REFERENCES: 1. Spiritual CapacityCHAPTER MARKERS: 1:05- Various areas where we can develop spiritual capacity 1:35- Our focus today: How we can increase our spiritual capacity through knowledge. 2:40- Development of spiritual maturation never ends. Age enhances (does not impair) our spiritual capacity 5:02- “Hobbies" can aid in spiritual development 14:28- Tool #1- Being curious19:55- Tool #2- Learning and teaching with diligence 25;33- Tool #3- Living close to the Holy Ghost can enrich and expedite our learning. The Holy Ghost can illuminate and magnify our learning30:44- Tool #4- Making choices that will give us growth and joy in this life and in the life to come

Do some days feel like you can tackle the world, but other days feel like you’re just creeping by? This week, Kristy draws on lessons from nature to show how our physical, emotional and mental resources relate to our ability to maintain or grow our capacity. We’ll talk about which major and minor life factors can affect our capacity and how they contribute to why our load is always changing. We’ll learn cues to help us know if it’s time to slow down or hit the gas and then brainstorm ways we can rest and replenish so we’re more equipped to carry our loads and stay bright!RESOURCES AND REFERENCES: 1. 4 Examples of Carrying Capacity2. Carrying CapacityCHAPTER MARKERS: 1:00 Carrying Capacity/ Population Density3:30- Our "Core" Capacity loads4:55- Personal Carrying Capacity, Fringe Capacity: The space outside of our Core demandsSpecific examples of carrying capacity in nature7:23- 1st- North American Deer- as we make changes to our environment, we need to check our core/ fringe capacities and make sure not to exceed of personal carrying capacity or we can figuratively begin to starve. We need balance. 12:59- 2nd- Grazing Cattle- once we are "overgrazed" it can take a long time for the nutrients to return to the soil. We cannot sustain anything new. We need to give ourselves time and space to heal and replenish. 28:24- 3rd- Barnacles and Oysters- we must make space for the things that need space in our lives, and push other things out in order to support the most important things.

This week Angie and Kristy discuss the relationship between confidence and spirituality and specifically identify three Christlike traits we can live TODAY to build more confidence. Angie looks for patterns that Christ lived by that can help us face difficult tasks and circumstances, shift our perspective from a place of insecurity to power, and develop our sense of worthiness as we build it in others. We hope you feel encouraged as we learn from His example!RESOURCES AND REFERENCES:1. How to Build Confidence and Self Esteem2. Confidence and Self Worth by Glen L. Pace3. By Divine Design by Ronald L. RasbandCHAPTER MARKERS: 1:21- Pattens and Characteristics that Jesus Christ lived by help us strengthen our confidence 1:32- Trait #1- Order - God is not haphazard in the spiritual realm where the eternal destiny of souls is at stake. 1:46- Billy Graham quote8:40- Trait #2- Seeing the big picture 12:25- George Q Cannon- Quote on Divine Parentage 20:16- Trait #3- Charity Towards All Men 20:23- Glen L. Pace quote21:40- proverbs 18:21- Death and Life are in the power of the tongue

Self confidence is like the water running in your house. We may not know all of the ins and outs of it, but if it’s not working, it has a painful effect on our health and lifestyle! Our self confidence is a general view of how likely we are to accomplish a goal, especially based on our past experience. Kristy and Angie discuss three practical ways we can fortify our self-confidence. Learn how to expose ourselves to new experiences, increase our tolerance for risk and discomfort and view our non-linear progress as growth instead of failure. Invest in yourself and listen in!RESOURCES AND REFERENCES: Practical Ways to Improve Your Self- Confidence and Why You Should Maslow's Hierarchy of NeedsFit to CodeCHAPTER MARKERS: 1:24- Distinguish between Self- Confidence, Self- Esteem, and Self- Efficacy3:55- Fit to Code Research7:10- Three Tools to Increase Self- Confidence or the general view of how likely you are to accomplish a goal, based on past experience.7:15- Tool #1- Expose and Educate18:01- Tool #2- Take a Risk29:37- Tool #3- Leave Room to Fail

Have you ever felt like you don’t have the words to navigate a disagreement? Do you find yourself getting hurt and angry or even out of control? Do you have arguments that seem to come up over and over? Join Angie and Kristy as they teach the words and phrases from the Gottman Repair Checklist that will de-escalate, soothe and repair those hurtful arguments in our lives. Learn exactly what to say when you’re overwhelmed, worried, sorry or are trying to bridge a gap, but don’t know quite how. This is a must listen for anyone wanting to add tools to your reconciliation tool box!RESOURCES AND REFERENCES: 1. Gottman Repair Checklist (for purchase)2. R is for Repair by Zach Brittle CHAPTER MARKERS:

This week we discover principles of reconciliation that will allow us to not only heal and restore our relationships but make them better, stronger, healthier and happier. Join us as we learn concepts that have been used to heal damaged political relationships in history and see how these relate to our own one on one relationships. Understand the connection between reconciliation, struggle and transformation and why it's important to honor the truth of what has happened in order for reconciliation to truly take place. Do you desire more beautiful relationships? Listen in and let us know how this episode helped you!RESOURCES AND REFERENCES: 1. Reconciliation, struggle, transformation: An Introduction2. Reconciliation: A comprehensive framework for empirical analysis3. Patrick Doyle: Reconciliation4. No Future Without Forgiveness by Desmond Tutu5. Genocide's Legacy: A Reconciliation Village in Rwanda6. The Role of Women in Post- Conflict Peace-building7. God Sleeps in Rwanda: A Journey of Transformation8. Forgiveness and Reconciliation9. Left to Tell: Discovering God Amidst the Rwanda HolocaustCHAPTER MARKERS: 2:35- Exploring the word reconciliation 4:48- Angie’s existing thoughts about reconciliation. How does reconciliation differ from forgiveness? 7:32- Kristy’s story about manifesting reconciliation and the resources she found. 12:53- Journal of Peacemaking- Reconciliation, Struggle, and Transformation: An Introduction 14:31- Two ideas that encompass what reconciliation in any relationship looks like 1- If we look at the relationship now, we would never believe that what had happened.2- Honoring and remembering what did happen is part of the ability to create something more beautiful, stronger, healthier and more loving. 15:47- Reconciliation: Restoration of friendly relations 17:22- Struggle 18:05- How have you struggled with changing your beliefs, viewpoints, ways, and thoughts in a specific relationship that allowed reconciliation to take place, and in what ways was the struggle a critical part of making things whole/ better? 20:22- Transformation: true change 21:39- Angie’s thoughts on transformation. Does true transformation require forgiveness? 27:26- Honoring and remembering how history happened. 29:19- Relationships made stronger because you honored TRUTH and the things that had happened.

This week, we continue our two week topic of the power of our thoughts. Angie shares four spiritual questions we can ask ourselves to wield this power most effectively. Learn which of these four Ezra Taft Benson says is THE most important question we could ever ask ourselves. Move into your week with a real plan to think better of yourself, step into your power and face challenges with confidence!"The thought in your mind at this moment is contributing- however infinitesimally, almost imperceptibly to the shaping of your soul, even to the lineaments of your countenance... even passing and idle thoughts leave their impression." - David O. McKayRESOURCES AND REFERENCES: 1. The Power of Your Thoughts: Think on Christ by Ezra Taft Benson2. Discerning the Will of the Lord For Me by Lanae Valentine3. Doctrine and Covenants 58:26-28CHAPTER MARKERS: 2:35- Four Spiritual Questions that we can ask ourselves to harness the power of our thoughts. 2:40- What action will this thought lead me to? 3:16- As a man thinketh so is he.... 4:33- "The thought in your mind at this moment is contributing, however infinitesimally, almost imperceptibly to the shaping of your soul, even to the lineaments of your countenance. . . . even passing and idle thoughts leave their impression." (David O. McKay). 9:10- "Thoughts lead to acts, acts lead to habits, habits lead to character, and our character will determine our eternal destiny." - Ezra Taft Benson11:37- Kristy traces back thoughts that impacted actions as an athlete

This week we explore the power of thought! We’ll teach you how we can reframe our thinking to realize the life we really want as we dive into the concept of manifesting. Kristy shows how we must do more than just positive or negative thinking to move closer to our dreams. How much depends on us? How much depends on God? How can we show God we’re ready to pioneer toward something wonderful? Learn two powerful tools to help us embark into our best lives!"....positive or negative thoughts bring positive or negative experiences into a person’s life..... people and their thoughts are made from pure energy and that the process of like energy attracting like energy does indeed exist….and through this process, people can improve their lives- their health, wealth, and personal relationships among other things. We can use the law of attraction to manifest our dreams by putting like energy out into the universe to draw the same type of energy or realization towards us."RESOURCES AND REFERENCES: 1. What is Manifestation and Why Should I Care? 2. How to Journal for Manifesting Success3. Three Laws of Attraction4. UntamedCHAPTER MARKERS:

In this bonus episode, Kristy and Angie review The Seven Levels of Intimacy by Matthew Kelly. Kelly teaches that intimacy must develop in a linear fashion, step by step. Learn how applying the different levels can support the true purpose of a relationship: to help, challenge, encourage, and inspire each other to become the best version of ourselves. We promise this resource will excite you for what’s possible for your relationship! “Intimacy is mutual self revelation. It is two people constantly discovering and rediscovering each other.” RESOURCES AND REFERENCES: 1. The Seven Levels of Intimacy by Matthew Kelly 2. Facilitating Positive Change- Reviewing The Seven Levels of IntimacyCHAPTER MARKERS: 1:10- Foundational Concepts of Intimacy4:22- Angie's Story- Mutual support builds intimacy7:18- Matthew Kelly's definition of intimacy: Intimacy is mutual self- revelation. It is two people constantly discovering and rediscovering each other. 9:09- 1st Level of Intimacy- Cliches13:52- 2nd Level of Intimacy- Facts15:56- 3rd Level of Intimacy- Opinions17:42- 4th Level of Intimacy- Hopes, Dreams, Fears, Passions20:16- 5th Level of Intimacy- Feelings26:53- 6th Level of Intimacy- Faults, Fears, and Failures30:06- 7th Level of Intimacy- Legitimate Needs33:20- The purpose of discipline in Intimacy

“Both healthy and unhealthy couples fight. The key distinction is how they fight.” This week we share lessons from Dan Bates, a clinical mental health counselor, on the rules of love which he says must be followed to truly love your partner. Troubleshoot your relationship and determine if you might be breaking one of the six argument commandments. Learn to increase intimacy, trust, and respect through establishing ground rules for disagreements.RESOURCES AND REFERENCES: 1. Intimacy Has It's Rules, Psychology Today, Dan Bates2. 3 Nephi 14:123. Mary Stallings, Come Follow Me Daily4. Happy Couples Know These Two Fighting Rules, Harriet Lerner, P.h.D.5. Dance of Anger, The: A Woman's Guide To Changing The Patterns Of Intimate Relationships6. The Four Horsemen: Criticism, Contempt, Defensiveness, StonewallingCHAPTER MARKERS: 0:00- Expanding On Intimacy14:30- Intimacy, 10 Commandments Style (Rules of Love)17:07- 1st Rule of Love: Don't Bring Up Past Mistakes 24:08- 2nd Rule of Love: Don't Interrupt30:28- 3rd Rule of Love: Don't Be Uncharitable34:23- 4th Rule of Love: Don't Play the Blame Game37:58- 5th Rule of Love: No Cheap Shots40:57- 6th Rule of Love: Don't Change The Subject

This week we are sparking a desire to foster more intimacy! Learn the four types of intimacy that psychologists, researchers and experts agree are key in developing deep, abiding and joyful relationships. Fortify your intimacy intelligence with tips and examples from some of Kristy’s favorite books on the subject and take Angie’s double dog dare challenge to help you feel closer to those you love!"Intimacy is the one thing we cannot live happily without. We can survive but cannot thrive without it. Without intimacy, all the riches in the world cannot satisfy our hungry hearts. Until we experience intimacy, our hearts remain restless, irritable, and discontented."REFERENCES AND RESOURCES: 1. Intimacy- Good Therapy2. The 5 Types of Intimacy3. The associations of intimacy and sexuality in daily life: Temporal dynamics and gender effects within romantic relationships. 4. Spiritual Intimacy, Marital Intimacy, and Physical/Psychological Well-Being: Spiritual Meaning as a Mediator5. Intimacy: Into Me See6. Couple Communication, Emotional and Sexual Intimacy, and Relationship Satisfaction7. Seven Levels of Intimacy8. Emotional First Aid 9. Raising an Emotionally Intelligent ChildCHAPTER MARKERS: 3:45- Scenario 1- We want to be more intimate in our relationshipsScenario 2- We want our partner, kids, friends to be more intimate in our relationships6:19- What is Intimacy? 6:51- Matthew Kelly- Quote about Intimacy from Seven Levels of Intimacy7:59- We are not all on the same intimacy frequency10:36- Into Me See: Intimacy implies letting someone else get close to us11:09- Connecting with people in a powerful way12:48- Four types of intimacy: Experiential, Emotional, Intellectual, Physical/ Sexual 13:24- Experiential Intimacy23:05- Emotional Intimacy37:11- Intellectual Intimacy43:42- Physical/ Sexual Intimacy

Stay Bright welcomes guest Hans Rawhouser. Hans shares his perspectives on how to navigate sensitive public discourse without being disagreeable. Learn his peaceful communication beatitudes along with critical thinking tips to help us make a positive impact in any discussion.

In this week’s episode, we examine anger though its spiritual opposite: unity. Angie shares four strategies from Henry B. Eyring’s talk, “Our Hearts Knit Together as One” to help us become more skillful peacemakers.

This week we’re taking the shame out of admitting we need help with anger. We’ll share what author Gary Chapman (author of The 5 Love Languages) says are the origins and purposes of anger in his book, The Other Side of Love - Handling Anger in a Godly Way and reveal how anger feeds family dysfunction. Learn five tools to help us process anger with dignity and listen in on some funny and not so funny stories from Kristy and Angie that will help us all take a deep breath and do better next time! "When we feel we've been wronged, we have suffered already. Let's choose eways to deal with anger so as to not suffer any more!" RESOURCES AND REFERENCES: 1. The Other Side of Love: Gary Chapman2. Anger as a Basic Emotion and Its Role in Personality Building and Pathological Growth: The Neuroscientific, Developmental and Clinical Perspectives3. How Pixar's Inside Out Gets Anger Right 4. How to Recognize and Deal with Anger5. Patrick Doyle- Anger (1) 6. Patrick Doyle- Anger (2) CHAPTER MARKERS: 1:58- You are among friends. We are learning together about anger. This is a time for self- reflection. 2:27- The Other Side of Love 3:26- Take the shame out of struggles with anger 4:35- Two purposes in writing The Other Side of Love 4:55- “Key ingredient in family dysfunction is a lack of understanding in processing anger."5:04- “When we know how to positively process anger we create a more secure environment and also greater potential for our children to positively process anger and have better relationships. 7:59- Identify specific situations/ triggers that exacerbate anger in us. 9:35- What is the origin of anger? 11:26- Patrick Doyle… Beneath anger is hurt and beneath hurt is injustice. 11:59- Kristy’s Story about housecleaners. 15:14- Angie’s story about mishandling anger. 17:42- What is the purpose of anger? 19:24- Angie's story about her response to anger and positive results 21:24- Paramount questions: 1- is the action I’m considering positive? Does it have the potential for dealing with the wrong and healing the relationship? 2- Is the action I’m considering loving?22:55- Valid anger- what is it? 23:21- 5 part model for making anger productive #1- Consciously acknowledge to ourselves that we are angry #2- Restrain our immediate response #3- Locate the focus of our anger #4- Analyze our options#5- Take constructive action

This week Dr. Elia Gourgouris, a positive psychology expert certified by the American Red Cross in Disaster Mental Health joins award winning facilitator and coach, Konstantinos Apostolopoulos (Coach Kon) to reveal the four types of human responses to unexpected or rapid change (crisis). We learn the difference between danger and fear and how to choose faith over fear in dire situations. Dr. Elia and Coach Kon share how we can strategically develop more resilience by practicing the 7 Keys to Navigating a Crisis. Grab a copy of their practical guide to emotionally dealing with pandemics and other disasters and learn to improvise, adapt, and overcome in any challenge. "This is a battle we are dealing with.... a spiritual battle, a physical battle, and a mental battle.... it requires us to think differently." RESOURCES AND REFERENCES: 1. 7 Keys to Navigating a Crisis: A Practical Guide to Emotionally Dealing with Pandemics and Other Disasters.CHAPTER MARKERS: 1:14- Introduction of Dr. Elia Gourgouris and Konstantinos Apostolopoulos. 2:52- How Dr. Elia became trained is Disaster Mental Health 5:05- What defines a crisis? 7:09- How can we choose to respond to crises with faith and not fear or out of threats of danger? 4 Responses to Unexpected or Rapid Change: 8:47- Victim Mode9:11- Critic Mode9:48- Bystander Mode10:13- Navigator Mode13:13- Resilience is the ability to flexibly adapt to challenging, adverse, or traumatic life events. It is a set of strategies that can be learned. 7 Keys to Navigating a Crisis: 17:48- Key #1 Self Care - Personal Health Care Assessment22:18- Key #2- Awareness26:29- Key #3- Flexibility 28:35- Keys #4 and #5- Preparation and Initiative35:02- Keys #6 and #7- Positive Attitude and Kindness37:20- Improvise, Adapt, Overcome (3 important traits in navigating a crisis) 40:01- Advice for operating in proactive rather than reactive mode

How does the idea of small and simple things relate to our spiritual growth? Angie leads a discussion on how focused and frequent nourishment to our spirits will help us sink deep testimony roots. We explore the nobility of ordinary, small and simple tasks, and reveal the power that little course corrections inspired by the Holy Spirit have to not only keep us on the safe road back to our Heavenly Father, but to also improve our relationships here on earth. RESOURCES AND REFERENCES: 1. Small and Simple Things by Dallin H. Oaks 2. Small and Simple Things by M. Russell Ballard3. D&C 64:33- "Wherefore be not weary in well doing, for ye are laying the foundation of a great work. And out of small things, proceedeth that which is great."4. Power to Ovecome the Adversary by Peter M. JohnsonCHAPTER MARKERS: 1:06- IDEA #1 Small and Simple Grows Deep Roots1:15- Steven Wheelwright- Through the small and simple God blesses us with small daily miracles and over time with marvelous works. 1:40- David A. Bednar- Steady drip of water likened unto our spiritual life; focused and frequent in receiving consistent drops of spiritual nourishment. 3:12- Kristy's story about hiking- Look up focused and frequent! 4:49- Story about Janice Kapp Perry6:30- Boyd K. Packer quote: Don't miss small opportunities because we are wanting to do something monumental. 7:16- D&C 64: 33 8:30- Kristy's story- the small drip of parenthood. Listening to her daughter talk with a neighbor. 12:02- IDEA #2 There is nobility is the simple acts of kindness and goodness.12:30- Howard W. Hunter quote- Commonplace tasks have great impact on others.12:45- Angie's examples of quiet service and the powerful results in her life.15:18- Angie's story of her mother helping her look up scriptures17:03- Friends inviting her in college. 19:12- Kristy's story of her mother helping her memorize The Articles of Faith from The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints21:40- Angie's story of a miracle- a friend thanking her for her example and kindness 20 years later. 25:35- Christ's first miracle was quiet and simple. 26:23- IDEA #3- Keep hold of your spiritual steering wheel and adjust when necessary. 26:35- Angie's story of first learning how to drive. 27:44- M. Russell Ballard quote- Purposes of the Lord generally are fulfilled through small and simple things.28:20- Examples of small nudges that we may feel or hear. 32:28- Kristy references Power to Overcome the Adversary.

This week is all about small and simple! Kristy shares research and her personal philosophy that when we make the effort to do small and simple things, we can have a BIG impact on others and that will in turn make a difference in our own lives. She also offers three easy tools we can put into action right away to help us start making a difference in the world and reaping the joy that comes with small acts of goodness. Pinkie swear, they really are simple!RESOURCES AND REFERENCES: 1. Happy to Help? A Systematic Review and Meta-anaylsis of the effects of performing acts of kindness on the well-being of the actor 2. Just 7 Days of Small Acts of Kindness Will Make You Happier, Oxford Research Reveals 3. Why Random Acts of Kindness Matter to Your Well Being4. Happy People Become Happier Through Kindness: A Counting Kindness Intervention5. 100 Birds Taught Me To Fly6. Mother Theresa's Words“Kind words can be short and easy to speak. But their echos are truly endless.”7. “Nourish what makes you feel confident, connected, contented. Opportunity will rise to meet you.”- Oprah Winfrey CHAPTER MARKERS: 2.27- Study on using random acts of kindness to treat physical, emotional, and social problems 3:40- Pay it Forward5:10- Story of Rachel and the tomato plants 9:45- Ideas to get motivated to do small and simple acts of kindness that make a big difference. 10:22- IDEA #1 Be a CopycatKeep an inspiration journal and actTake notes on people we meet to recall laterNote others' important events on our calendar15:15- Angie story to never suppress a generous thought 19:00- IDEA #2 Let Creativity Work in You19:32- Ashley Mae Hoiland's Be Brave Story22:45- Ashley Mae Hoiland's GROW Story24:19- Identifying and using our natural gifts to serve 27:45- IDEA #3 Celebrate the Small29:02- Angie's story of losing a high school friend, and how kind words helped pull her through31:14- Other ideas to practice small and simple acts of kindness36:55- Our two requests this week:Share our podcast with someone who may need more kindness in their lifeShare with us your small and simple ideas to act in kindness

This week the Stay Bright Podcast hosts Catina Haverlock in a special bonus episode. Catina shares tender lessons and personal wisdom about grief and choosing joy after her life took a sudden and unexpected turn. Catina is the mother of 22 year old, Adam who is profoundly affected by autism. She shares advice on how to avoid the comparison trap when we could be tempted to measure our happiness against others’ situations, why it’s ok to feel sad sometimes, and how to find daily bright spots of gratitude regardless of our circumstances. RESOURCES AND REFERENCES: Catina Haverlock: Catina met her college sweetheart when she was 19. This year, they’ll celebrate their 26th wedding anniversary. They have four children, and after exploring different parts of the country, have laid down roots in Southern California. Catina is the co-author of two best-selling books, spent 8 years as a marketing director and professional for a Big Four public accounting firm. She served for seven years as communications director, training director and president for Nevada’s largest non-profit that serves individuals with autism and their families. Currently, she’s working on her third book and providing marketing and public relations support for a large non-profit in San Diego. She’s also Adam’s mom! Adam is 22 years old and is profoundly affected by Autism. 1. The Autism Community in Action 2. Beyond The Novel3. Catina's Blog

Stay Bright welcomes our first guest to the podcast! Musician Stacie Morris joins Kristy and Angie to share an unexpected lesson she learned about herself when a painful door closed in her life. Angie and Kristy discuss four tools that take us from wandering in our own emotional and spiritual wildernesses, to pointing our faith to the future. Lessons on the relationship between progress and obedience from the experiences of a developing Joseph Smith and encouraging words from Jeffrey R. Holland, John Bytheway, and Gordon B. Hinkley. RESOURCES AND REFERENCES:1. Five Scriptures that Will Help You Through Almost Anything by John Bytheway2. Saints3. But if Not by Lance B. Wickman4. Remember Lot's Wife - Faith is for the Future by Jeffrey R. Holland5. 1 Corinthians 2:96. Believing Christ by Stephen Robinson7. Isaiah 55:98. (Mosiah 15:7)CHAPTER MARKERS:1:30- Intro- Curveballs and unmet expectation2:12- Lance B. Wickman- dwelling on questions3:10- Kristy's story- "My ways are higher than your ways"6:06- 1 Corinthians 2:9 6:47- Tool #1- Trust the Author7:02- We believe in Christ but do we believe Him??? 8:35- Angie discusses humility and submissiveness 10:27- Kristy's story about the blessing of not moving to Bend, Oregon15:31- Questions to ask ourselves if we cannot find the open door16:09- Tool #2- What are we being invited to learn about ourselves from this experience or this suffering?16:23- John Bytheway- Story of Abraham19:12- Stacie Morris' story of a closed door at Carnegie Hall33:04- Tool #3- Don't underestimate obedience33:35- Lesson on obedience: What we can learn from Joseph Smith36:40- Exact obedience reference37:26- Obedience is a form of humility and submissiveness37:59- Tool #4- Look forward and not back38:50- Ways that we look back39:12- Holland quote- look forward40:42- Rumination- unproductive thought41:10- Can we see all things as the Lord being merciful? 42:55- Our trust in God can be unbreakable43:22- Greatest lesson learned from a missionary43:47- Quote by Jenkin Lloyd Jones- "Life is like an old time rail journey..."

This is an episode for anyone who’s ready to look forward and not back! When doors in our lives close, we mourn the loss of what once was. Closed doors are hard. They should feel hard. Kristy leads a discussion on how to reframe our thinking to find other doors that can lead to new forms of opportunity, joy and beauty. These research-backed tools are especially helpful for navigating the unexpected changes of plans that life throws at us, and for the natural transitions we encounter along the way. Join us and get inspired to embrace the future with optimism and a determination to find happiness. RESOURCES AND REFERENCES:1. Harvard Business Review: To Get People to Embrace Change Emphasize What Will Stay the Same. 2. Identifying Opportunity in Adversity3. ERL: Do you see problems as Obstacles or opportunities? 4. The Benefits of Adversity are Very, Very Real5. Tough Mudder Obstacles6. Tell Your Heart to Beat Again Lyrics by Hilary Weeks CHAPTER MARKERS:1:12- Opening scenario- When a door in your life closes 4:43- "When doors close we mourn the loss of what once was….closed doors are hard” 5:44- Kristy story: Not getting motel manager opportunity but something better10:38- Angie story: Missing out on buttery yellow house but meeting BFF 15:47- Research backed tools to help us find the open door when one closes 15:56- Tool #1- Accept and embrace that the old door has closed 16:43- Continuity- An effective change leadership strategy (HBR)17:45- Kristy story: Keeping things the same while in a 6-week hospital stay 19:33- Finding comfort in continuity while facing long term and short term changes 20:44- “In overcoming resistance to change…. communicate and appealing vision of change in combination with a vision of continuity” (HBR)21:12- Angie story: Finding continuity during COVID-19 changes 22:34- Tool #2- Believe another door is going to open and determine to find it22:57- “…offsetting opportunity in every adversity and every obstacle…” Robert Ringer's experiences25:22- Angie story: How moving strengthened her confidence and changed her perspective on what she’s capable of doing. 27:25- Tough Mudder obstacles 29:00- “Obstacles don’t have to stop you…..” (Michael Jordan) 29:47- Tool #3- Find beauty in the transformation 30:02- Kristy story: Finding beauty in the transformation of her marital separation 31:36- Kristy story: Metal being re-shaped 32:24- Annihilation quote: What is indestructible and unbreakable in us?33:23- Angie story: Transitioning from home to college 36:00- Benefits of closing doors

Most of us have more things expected of us than we can possibly do. Our spiritual and physical health depend upon our ability to regularly assess what is needful in our lives and to let the rest go. Using the Savior’s admonition to Martha to choose what is needful, Angie leads a discussion on the four key relationships that will help us determine what is spiritually essential in our lives. "I’m going to make a simple and bold statement: I believe it is vital for our spiritual and physical health to learn how to regularly assess what is needful in our lives and to let the rest go."RESOURCES AND REFERENCES: 1. Good, Better, Best by Dallin H. Oaks2. Of Things That Matter Most by Dieter F. Uchtdorf3. Martha and Mary, Ensign Magazine, April 2019 Camille Fronk Olson4. The Power of Plainness by Marvin J. Ashton5. Luke 10: 41-42 "And Jesus answered and said unto her, Martha, Martha, thou art careful and troubled about many things: But one thing is needful: and Mary hath chosen that good part, which shall not be taken away from her."6. Matt 16:26 "For what is a man profited, if he shall gain the whole world, and lose his own soul? or what shall a man give in exchange for his soul?"7. D&C 88:63 "Draw near unto me and I will draw near unto you; seek me diligently and ye shall find me; ask, and ye shall receive; knock, and it shall be opened unto you."8. John 6:35 "And Jesus said unto them, I am the bread of life: he that cometh to me shall never hunger; and he that believeth on me shall never thirst."9. Acts 2:17 "And it shall come to pass in the last days, saith God, I will pour out of my Spirit upon all flesh: and your sons and your daughters shall prophesy, and your young men shall see visions, and your old men shall dream dreams:"10. Mosiah 4:27 "And see that all these things are done in wisdom and order; for it is not requisite that a man should run faster than he has strength. And again, it is expedient that he should be diligent, that thereby he might win the prize; therefore, all things must be done in order."11. Revelation for the Church Revelation for Our Lives by Russel M. Nelson12. The Family: A Proclamation to the World13. Boundaries: When to Say Yes, How to Say No to Take Control of Your Life by Henry Cloud and John Townsend

Using concepts from Greg McKeown’s Book, Essentialism: The disciplined pursuit of less, Kristy makes the argument that only once we give ourselves permission to stop trying to do it all, to stop saying yes to everyone, can we make your highest contribution towards the things that really matter. She teaches some key tenets of essentialism including the need to prioritize our own lives before everyone and everything else will. We explore some tools that help us decide what our highest work is, how to cut out good opportunities for something better and how to give a graceful no. Join us for a conversation that will help us commit to things that are truly important and restore the quality of our life’s work!RESOURCES AND REFERENCES: Essentialism: The Disciplined Pursuit of Less by Greg McKeownWhy So Many Successful People Wear the Same Outfit EverydayDeep Work: Rules for Focused Success in a Distracted World by Cal Newport Non-Violent Communication: A Language of Life: Life-Changing Tools for Healthy Relationships

Angie poses the question: Is worry a choice? And if so, what can we do to overcome it? She bases her spiritual tools for worry on the principles Paul taught about fear in 2 Timothy: Power, Love and a Sound Mind. She shares insights from those who survived the Great Depression and the Holocaust and issues a single challenge that will help you experience more peace and light and worry less. "...repeat after me, we are not puppets in the hands of fate, and no matter how dire our situation is, we are not designed to be acted upon."RESOURCES AND REFERENCES: Gordon B. Hinkley: God Hath Not Given Us the Spirit of FearD&C 50:23–24Act in Doctrine: Spiritual patterns for turning from self to the Savior by David A. BednarMan's Search for Meaning by Viktor E. Frankl2 Tim. 1:6–7

Managing emotions is a full-time job! And learning how to soothe worry is a fundamental life skill and a key component to emotional intelligence. In this episode, Kristy leads a discussion that helps us understand why we worry and guides us to make a healthy plan for managing it. We’ll explore how worry can actually be useful and give you tools to escape the riptides of worry - when worry runs amok! Also, tips on how to know if what you are feeling is more serious than run-of-the-mill worry. "We want a sense of self-mastery... that our emotional reactions are appropriate and proportionate to the situation."RESOURCES AND REFERENCES: Emotional Intelligence by Daniel GolemanPsychology Today- Emotional IntelligenceWorry and Generalized Anxiety Disorder: A Review...How Worrying Affects Your BodyAn Investigation of Worry Content Among Generally Anxious IndividualsEmotional First Aid by John FishbeinThe Opposite of Worry by Lawrence J. CohenA Smart Girl's Guide: Worry: How to Feel Less Stress and Have More Fun

In this episode, Angie shares tools to help us turn disabling shame into faithful action. Through the concept of divine discontent, we explore the usefulness of a healthy sense of guilt and how it can motivate us to strive for change. We learn to identify when our productive guilt has soured into paralyzing shame and what to do to break out of it. "Healthy and reasonable guilt is taking personal responsibility for our not acting in a way that honors our true potential . . . This is responsible and can even be hopeful and productive." "There is a profound difference between shame and guilt." - Brene BrownRESOURCES AND REFERENCES: 1. Brene Brown's thoughts on Shame vs. Guilt2. Michelle D. Craig- Divine Discontent 3. The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse: Criticism, Contempt, Defensiveness, and Stonewalling4. All In- Courtney Rich: My Recipe for Battling Depression Christ and Cake5. 2 Corinthians 12:7-10 Paul's thorn in the flesh reference. My grace is sufficient for thee. When I am weak, then I am strong. 6. Helaman 3:35 Wax stronger and stronger in humility and firmer and firmer in the faith of Christ. 7. John 17:3 This is life eternal, that they may know thee the only true God, and Jesus Christ, whom thou hast sent.

In the process of growing into more mature and developed versions of ourselves, we can sometimes compare where we are on the journey to where we feel like we should be. We can be our own worst critics. We might even call ourselves hypocrites. In this episode, Kristy breaks down the distinction between a true hypocrite - one who pretends to be something we are not in order to deceive, and a human - one who makes mistakes in the process of improving. She shares tools to help us take off our masks and view our own and others’ mistakes more compassionately. RESOURCES AND REFERENCES: The Origin of HypocriteBlog Post- Pastor Charles Pope I Can Change -Brandon Flowers Strategic Silence- Withholding Certification Status as a Hypocrisy Avoidance Tactic

Angie leads a discussion that compares emotional buffering to spiritual sleep. We explore the concept of spiritual bondage and how it relates to habits that hurt. Learn how to identify when a buffer is becoming an addiction and how to instead bind ourselves to behaviors that heal and help us spiritually awaken!...RESOURCES and REFERENCES: Mary Stallings Come Follow Me Post- Sleeping from SorrowFree Forever to Act for Themselves: D. Todd ChristophersonFlaxen Threads by Carlos E AsayYouTube video on how flax thread is madeWhat Lack I Yet?: Larry LawrenceMatthew 19:16-22- What lack I yet scriptural reference Luke 22:45- Sleep from sorrow scriptural reference Psalms 17:5- Hold up my goings that my footsteps slip not.

Kristy leads a discussion on emotional buffering. We learn how to identify the negative behaviors we use when avoiding pain or uncomfortable emotions. She shares tools to overcome buffering behaviors like overspending, over-scheduling, negative food relationships and more. We learn how to be compassionate with ourselves when we do buffer and how to employ more positive solutions for coping with stress and discomfort. RESOURCES AND REFERENCES1. Article- Buffering Effect2. Book- Emotional First Aid by John Fishbein

Angie leads a discussion that explores the connection between personal development and happiness. She teaches what the scriptures reveal about the pattern God has shown to us for using our gifts and talents to experience joy. She and Kristy shed light on how to discover these gifts and talents - especially if you feel you don’t have any, and give some ideas that broaden our understanding of what a talent might be.RESOURCES AND REFERENCES: 1. Proverbs 3:13 "Happy is the man (or woman) that findeth wisdom and the man who getteth understanding."2. Proverbs 3:19-20 “The Lord by His wisdom hath founded (or created) the earth; by understanding hath he established the heavens."3. Matthew 5:48 ”Be ye therefore perfect, even as your father which is in heaven is perfect.”4. Perfection Pending by Russell M. Nelson5. Proverbs 3:27 "Withhold not good from them to whom it is due, when it is in the power of thine hands to do it."6. Luke 2:52 “Jesus increased in wisdom (intellectually), and stature (physically), and in favour with God (spiritually) and man (socially). 7. Be of Good Cheer by Christina Franco

HOW TO HAVE MORE HAPPINESS:Kristy leads a conversation that explores the concept that happiness is not only a mindset, but also a skill set. She teaches what the world’s researchers, thought leaders and experts have to say about the tools that create more happiness - including the number one factor discovered by Harvard researchers in a study that has spanned over 80 years. Kristy and Angie share their top four critical components of being happy. RESOURCES AND REFERENCES:1. Super Soul Podcast- I Am: Life is How You See It2. Original Sermon3. Good Genes are Nice, But Joy is Better- Harvard Study on Happiness

WHAT IS THE STAY BRIGHT MOVEMENT? Hosts Kristy Stout and Angela Larkin introduce themselves and give a behind the scenes peek at how the Stay Bright Movement came to be. Kristy shares the string of events including finishing her graduate degree during the most challenging year of her life, that led to her vision of sharing the tools that helped her through it. Angela gives a preview of podcast topics and describes how the movement evolved from conversations between two friends to a vision to help all people find the resources they need to stay bright. Kristy and Angie explain the two-sided approach they use to teach these topics- a study based and a faith based perspective.