How To Be a Person

In their last episode of How To Be a Person, Drucker and Dweck talk to their first-ever podcast guest (and their hilarious friend) Albertina Rizzo! 

In their penultimate episode, Drucker and Dweck talk about how much it sucks to be a writer. Was this episode necessary? Definitely not. Was it just another way to procrastinate and avoid writing? Probably. Honestly, we just wanted to end on the number 169. 

Writer Cirocco Dunlap (The New Yorker, Man Seeking Woman) teaches us how to deal with the break up of a relationship that was never actually a relationship, how to talk about the Legend of Zelda in therapy, how to conquer your fear of spiders, and how to write a good children's book. 

Musician, author, and comedy nerd Paul Myers teaches us how to write a biography. Check out his new book, The Kids in the Hall: One Dumb Guy, available wherever books are sold!

Another Drucker-Dweck solo ep!

Comedian and writer Nate Fernald (Late Late Show) teaches us how to build a house and many other things. Also, Drucker goes missing and mysteriously resurfaces in the middle of the podcast. It's a crazy one. 

Comedian, author, and musician Lane Moore talks about her new book "How To Be Alone," which you should buy! We also talk about reaching out to people, talking to weird people on Tinder, dealing with families, and living our dream lives while constantly feeling bad about it. It's a fun episode! For real, listen. Do it now!

The title says it all. Enjoy!

The hilarious Louis Virtel ("Billy On the Street", "Keep It!") teaches us how to win money on a game show, how to love the movie "Clue," how to be an entertainment journalist, how to appreciate Iowa, how to write for Billy Eichner, how to do a spot-on Tim Gunn impression, and how to know every underappreciated older actress.

Comedy writer Chase Mitchell (The Tonight Show) teaches us the secret to a clever Halloween costume and how to deal with the death of MoviePass. 

In this solo ep, Dweck and Drucker talk about the crazy political news this week. 

Anna Drezen (SNL, Reductress) teaches us how to make the most of a hotel stay, how to fall in love with a train conductor, how to stalk someone online, how to get hired at SNL, and how to appreciate celebrity feet.

In this solo ep, Drucker and Dweck talk about customer service rep rage, nerds, democratic socialism, Taxi TV's Sandy Kenyon, and other very cool and fun topics.

Comedy writer Nicole Silverberg (Full Frontal with Samantha Bee, Reductress) teaches us how to kill giant swaths of flies, how to deal with trolls, how to go to a 'happening,' and how to appreciate a Reductress headline.

In this solo episode, Drucker tries to figure out what video games Dweck might be into and fails miserably!

Comedian and writer Matt Goldich (Late Night with Seth Meyers) teaches us how to drink a billion cups of coffee a day without going insane, how to write monologue jokes, and how to be normal. 

Comedian and writer Dan St. Germain teaches us how to meditate silently in the woods, how to enjoy late-career John Travolta, how to pitch a Die Hard movie, how to ice skate in the summer, and how to just barely keep it together. We had a bit of an audio failure on this one, so apologies for the poor sound quality. We sound like we're at the bottom of the ocean, which is honestly where we'd like to be right now.

It's another solo episode! Drucker and Dweck go through some listener emails and talk about depression, The Rock, and bad roommates.

Comedy writer Cullen Crawford (Colbert, The Onion, ClickHole) teaches us how to survive in the woods, how to really enjoy New Orleans, how to work in a haunted abandoned hospital, how to write the perfect Your Mom joke, how to manage anxiety, and how to nail a job interview by drinking beer and doing push-ups.

Comedian Sean Crespo (Full Frontal with Samantha Bee) teaches us how to forget your first language, injure your legs, audition for an Adam Sandler movie, how to stay in touch with friends, how to go to acting school, and grow up in the back of a diner. Also, what's up with Roseanne?   As usual, if you like our little podcast, please tell your friends and subscribe online. Also donate to our Patreon at Patreon dot com / how to be a person. Thank you! We mean it. Thank you!

Drucker tries to introduce Dweck to the wonderful world of video game music and it doesn't go well. 

Comedian Samantha Ruddy comes on the show to teach us the secret to perfectly reheated pizza (it's not more cheese!) and how to collect airline miles in a possibly financially questionable way! Should you do it? We can't legally say! (Probably not.) If you like our podcast, please subscribe and tell your friends. It helps people find us. Also donate to our Patreon at Patreon.com/howtobeaperson.

No new ep this week. We'll be back next week though!

Screenwriter Ed Solomon (Bill & Ted, Men in Black) teaches us how to take a note on your script, how to break into show biz, how to believe in your writing, how to appreciate the Super Mario Bros movie, and how he created Men in Black's Frank the Pug. (Dweck needed to know that last one.)

In this solo episode, Drucker and Dweck talk about "Wild Wild Country," the farce that is Michael Cohen, and whether we could ever be in a sex cult. The answer might NOT surprise you. (It's "no." Definitely no.)

In our very first live episode, actor and comedian Michael Ian Black and Nickelodeon/Food Network host Marc Summers teach us how to not prepare for an interview, how to do an impressive card trick, how to practice Twitter jiu-jitsu to handle trolls, how to love pie, how to make Nickelodeon slime, how to piss off the NRA, how to do sitcom warm-up, and how to destroy people's childhood.

Comedy writer Ariel Dumas (Colbert Report, The Late Show) teaches us how to begin a new habit and stick to it, how to start out in comedy in Chicago, how to name an improv team, how to appreciate stickers as an adult, and how to fix a toilet. 

Writer Joe Berkowitz (Fast Company, Away With Words) teaches us how to appreciate wordplay, how to find a bathroom in Times Square, how to attend a pun competition, and how not to lie to your children about bad words. 

In this solo episode, Drucker and Dweck discuss Facebook, Trump's latest screw-ups, and their shared love of FX's "American Crime Story: The Assassination of Gianni Versace." (Apologies for the echoey audio on this one. We're still figuring out our new setup and everything should be back to normal next week.)

Comedian Patrick Monahan (@pattymo) teaches us how to remember the names of all your friends' offspring, how to go to law school, how to get out of a contract, and how to love Drake albums. 

This week, Drucker sits out a blizzard by reading some of your viewer mail! Please send more to howtobeapersonpodcast@gmail.com! We'll be back next week, unless another blizzard destroys us.

Comedy writer Bridger Winegar (Kimmy Schmidt, Corporate) teaches us how to search for an apartment, how to write a great review of a mattress, and how to name a corporation.

Drucker and Dweck discuss their time as roommates, which is sadly coming to an end. But, don't worry, the podcast is not! It will go on forever.

No episode this week, but we'll be back next week with an all new one!

Comedian and writer Naomi Ekperigin (Broad City, Great News) teaches us how to make friends with intimidating women, how to survive Gossip Girl high school, and how to appreciate joke math. 

In this solo episode, Drucker and Dweck talk the 2018 State of the Union and how out-of-touch they are with popular music.

Comedian Robert Dean teaches us how to create your own museum, how to know more than anyone should about P. T. Barnum, how to be horrified by Looney Tunes cartoons, how to break up with a magician, and how to be a good docent.

In this episode, Drucker and Dweck lament their sad nomadic lifestyle and talk about how great it is to be 6'8" and 180 pounds. 

TV and comic book writer Jeff Loveness teaches us how to hike up (most of) Mount Everest, how to write an original comic, how to make friends while traveling, how to get altitude sickness but not food poisoning, how to collaborate with an illustrator, and how to appreciate Judas. Yes, that Judas. As always, if you like our podcast, please subscribe and rate us on iTunes and donate to our Patreon at patreon dot com slash howtobeaperson.

Drucker and Dweck once again part ways (geographically) and make plans for the new year.

That's right, HAPPY HOLIDAYS. 

Comedy powercouple Dan Klein (Wet Hot American Summer, Great News) and Kelly Hudson (Funny or Die) teach us how to plan a wedding without going insane, how to survive a tornado, how to fall in love with someone despite watching them do improv, and how to avoid pessimism. As always, if you like our podcast, please subscribe and rate us on iTunes, and donate to our Patreon at Patreon.com/howtobeaperson.

Mike and Jess talk about feeling sad during the holidays and what to do about it. Also, Season 2 of The Crown and the movie Gattaca for some reason. Was this an episode? We don't know.

Comedian and filmmaker H. Alan Scott teaches us how to convert to another religion, how to grow up as a liberal Mormon, how to make a documentary, how to teach mean about consent, how to survive cancer, how to know when it's okay to hate somebody, and how to love The Golden Girls. As always, if you like our podcast, please like and subscribe online. And tell your friends! It really helps people find us.

Comedian and President Show writer Alison Leiby teaches us how to eat alone, how to keep a bartender from talking to you, how to order at a restaurant, how to get mansplained at the gym, how to sound fancier than you are, and how to enjoy exercise. If you like our podcast, please like and subscribe. It really helps us out. And donate to our Patreon at Patreon dot com / how to be a person. Keep us ad free!

In this year's Thanksgiving episode, Mike and Jess get into the holiday spirit by giving tips on how to deal with your shitty family.

In this episode, Mike and Jess talk about stuff. I don't know, this is just what the podcast has become now. Enjoy! (Also, trigger warning.)

Superstore and Late Night writer Justin Shanes teaches us how to go from law to comedy, how to be a Battlestar Galactica superfan, and how to not die while hiking through the desert. If you like our podcast, please subscribe and rate us on iTunes (5 stars!) and donate to our patreon at patreon dot com slash how to be a person.

Superstore writer Vanessa Ramos teaches us how to handle work-related stress, how to not be annoying with a Halloween costume, how to escape San Antonio to get involved in comedy, how to find work from Twitter and stand-up, how to write for a sitcom, and how to NOT imagine people in their underwear when you're nervous. If you like our podcast - tell your friends! It helps them find us. Also Like and Subscribe and donate to our Patreon at Patreon dot com / How to be a person.

In this episode of "How To Be a Person," we learn how to know you're a writer and not a performer, how to traumatically shut down hecklers, how to forget your best friend's birthday, how to stop being hurt by the news, how to enjoy football, and how to avoid watching sex scenes on your iPad while riding the subway. As usual, if you like our podcast, please like and subscribe. And tell your friends! Please! And donate to our Patreon at Patreon dot com slash how to be a person.

Comedian, reporter, and President Show writer John Knefel teaches us how to make a great wedding speech, how to know if a joke is OK to say at a wedding, how to survive a job where you have to read the news all day, and how to use movie quotes in a wedding toast. Then we make John give wedding speeches for random celebrities. Ronald is marrying Grimace! As usual, if you like our podcast please subscribe and review us online. And tell your friends about it! Means a lot and helps other people find us. And donate to our Patreon at patreon.com/howtobeaperson.