POPULARITY
79 episodes with carla marie manly
2 episodes with carla marie manly
6 episodes with carla marie manly
5 episodes with carla marie manly
2 episodes with carla marie manly
3 episodes with carla marie manly
2 episodes with carla marie manly
2 episodes with carla marie manly
2 episodes with carla marie manly
Dr. Carla Marie Manly brings her expertise not only from her clinical practice but also as a wellness podcaster, hosting the uplifting mental health podcast "Imperfect Love." Dr. Manly's approach to manifestation is refreshingly grounded - she reminds us that true manifestation isn't about magical thinking, but rather about self-belief, consistent inner work, and the courage to trust our journey, even when it gets messy. In her words, "Manifestation takes us beyond the to-do lists and expectations and into the realm of making our dreams come true." As we enter the season of spring and new beginnings, Dr. Manly invites us to examine what seeds we're planting through our thoughts and self-talk, and whether those seeds are working for or against us. An award-winning author of four books including "The Joy of Imperfect Love," "Date Smart," "Joy from Fear," and "Aging Joyfully," Dr. Manly's work has been featured in major publications like The Wall Street Journal, The New York Times, Forbes, and Oprah. With her holistic approach honoring the body-mind-spirit connection and her trademark blend of direct honesty and humor, we're in for a thoughtful conversation about how we can all create more joy-filled lives. Links from the show: Dr Carla Marie Manly The Joy of Imperfect Love Embracing Your Life Journey: The key of Self Compassion Free uplifting Worksheets •Please sign up for the email list for future notifications•If you would like help starting your own show or podcast, as well as help selecting a microphone and setup for your voice; Please tap the microphone and leave me a message with your contact information and I will get back to you.Or you can email: talktomeguy@gmail.com
Should adults let go and act like kids? Guest: Dr. Carla Marie Manly, Clinical Psychologist Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Why do people insist they're right without knowing all the facts? Guest: Dr. Hunter Gehlbach, Educational Psychologist and Professor at the Johns Hopkins School of Education Scott's Thoughts: The spirit of Christmas Guest: Scott Shantz, CKNW Contributor View From Victoria: What can be put on the ballot? We get a local look at the top political stories with the help of Vancouver Sun columnist Vaughn Palmer Does Canada have a legal right to provide clean drinking water? Guest: Heather Maki, Associate of McCarthy Tetrault's Litigation Group and Class Counsel for the Shamattawa First Nation Should adults let go and act like kids? Guest: Dr. Carla Marie Manly, Clinical Psychologist How should BC's elected party address public safety in Surrey? Guest: Sukhi Sandhu, Spokesperson for Wake Up Surrey What is it like in the eye of Hurricane Milton? Guest: Reggie Cecchini, Washington Correspondent for Global News Why is BC seeing an uptick in spiders this season? Guest: Dr. Robb Bennett, Research Associate at the Royal BC Museum and Entomologist Who Has Studied Spiders For Over 50 years Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
When life feels stressful, dark, or challenging, we often tell ourselves--or are told by others--that we should just toughen and carry on. Yet, from my professional and personal experience, I've learned that compartmentalizing or burying our struggles only makes things worse in the long run. When we ignore our needs for mental, emotional, and physical safety, we can worsen underlying issues such as anxiety or unresolved trauma. On the positive side, I've discovered a mental health toolkit that helps foster genuine healing. Join me, Dr. Carla Marie Manly, and trauma medical expert Dr. Christy Gibson, for a heartfelt journey into the realm of trauma, anxiety, and the healing process. As physician Dr. Christy notes, "It took me so many years to recognize trauma underlies so much of physical and mental ill health that I saw. It took more years to learn why this happens in individuals and families and communities, especially those placed at risk in their social positions. It's now time to share what can be done at all these levels – to provide some hope and a solution focus. Without hope, trauma intensifies.” Please note that this episode contains sensitive trauma-related material; listener discretion is advised. Note: If you or someone you know needs immediate support, please call your emergency services. In the US, 24/7 help is available by calling "911," "988" (Suicide and Crisis Hotline), or SAMSA (Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration) at 1-800-662-HELP (4357). Additional links are in the show notes. Books by Dr. Carla Manly:Date Smart: Transform Your Relationships and Love FearlesslyJoy From Fear: Create the Life of Your Dreams by Making Fear Your Friend Aging Joyfully: A Woman's Guide to Optimal Health, Relationships, and Fulfillment for Her 50s and BeyondThe Joy of Imperfect Love: The Art of Creating Healthy, Securely Attached Relationships Connect with Dr. Carla Manly:Website: https://www.drcarlamanly.comInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/drcarlamanlyTwitter: https://www.twitter.com/drcarlamanlyFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/drcarlamanlyLinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/carla-marie-manly-8682362bYouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@dr.carlamariemanly8543TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@dr_carla_manly Book by Dr. Christy Gibson:The Modern Trauma Toolkit: Nurture Your Post-Traumatic Growth with Personalized Solutions Connect with Dr. Christy Gibson:Websites: https://www.christinegibson.netInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/moderntraumatoolkitLinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/christine-gibson-mdFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/gibtrotterMDYouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@dr.christinegibsonLove the show? Subscribe, rate, review, and share! https://drcarlamanly.com
Website(s): www.drcarlamanly.com Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/drcarlamanly Twitter: https://www.twitter.com/drcarlamanly/ Who among us hasn't, at one time or another, felt stuck in an unhealthy relationship or lamented our inability to find that “perfect” someone? Clinical psychologist Dr. Carla Marie Manly knows the secret to creating genuine, joy-filled relationships — and it has nothing to do with perfection. In her latest book, The Joy of Imperfect Love: The Art of Creating Healthy, Securely Attached Relationships, Dr. Manly emphasizes that real love is messy and imperfect, and she offers profound, yet easily digestible insights for building healthy relationships. Acutely aware of the role relationships play in mental health and well-being, Dr. Manly is available to share her insights with your audience. Please let me know if you are interested in scheduling an interview with Dr. Carla Marie Manly, or if you would like to see a copy of her book for interview/review/article purposes. To watch an interview with Dr. Manly about two of her previous books, please visit: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xfPUUmMIkMA. (This press release may be published in part or entirety by any print, broadcast, or internet/digital media outlet, or used by any means of social media sharing.) FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE Release the Illusion of Perfection: New Book Empowers Readers to Be Authentic With Romantic Partners NEW YORK, Jan. 29, 2024 — “The key to healthy relationships is accepting that real love is messy, imperfect, and a work in progress,” says clinical psychologist Dr. Carla Marie Manly, whose fourth book, The Joy of Imperfect Love, guides readers into a transformative journey toward compassionate, healthy connections. “As we release the illusion of perfection and channel our energy into positive actions, we naturally become more connected to ourselves and others,” Dr. Manly notes. In The Joy of Imperfect Love, Dr. Manly provides research-backed insights, captivating case examples and empowering exercises to lead readers through an exploration of how attachment issues and unresolved trauma negatively impact both self-love and relationship quality. Then, Dr. Manly offers sound solutions for creating the awareness and healthy habits that promote lasting love. Her inclusive narrative makes her insights accessible to all demographics and sexual orientations, and key concepts such as communication skills and emotional intelligence can be applied to romantic relationships, friendships, social relationships, and work relationships. Well-researched and fact-based with an emphasis on replacing destructive patterns such as negative self-beliefs and toxic inner narratives with healthy, awareness-based dynamics, The Joy of Imperfect Love aims to foster the positive mental and emotional health the world so desperately needs. “Readers will breathe a sigh of deep relief as they discover the doable, real-life secrets to creating joy-filled relationships and genuine, imperfect love,” Dr. Manly offers. About Dr. Carla Marie Manly
Dr. Carla Marie Manly helps us define real love.
For the first time in a long, long while the U.S. has dropped from the World Happiness Report's list of top 20 happiest countries. What happened? What steps can we take to find greater happiness in life? Let's Get Moving Host Maria Shilaos speaks with Clinical Psychologist Dr. Carla Marie Manly to learn how we can boost our mental health through joy-filled connections. Instagram: @movingmaria Facebook: Let's Get Moving with Maria Website: https://linktr.ee/letsgetmovingwithmaria
What does a happy, healthy relationship look like? How can chasing a “perfect” love end in disappointment? Dick’s guest, Dr. Carla Marie Manly is a clinical psychologist, lecturer and author. Her latest book is “Joy of Imperfect Love.”
Dr. Carla Marie Manly—clinical psychologist, Imperfect Love podcaster, and author—is based in Sonoma County, California. In addition to her clinical practice focusing on relationships and personal transformation, Dr. Manly is deeply invested in her roles as a consultant and speaker. With a refreshingly direct and honest approach—plus a dose of humor—Dr. Manly enjoys supporting others in the ever-evolving journey of life. Her novel self-development paradigm builds resilience, emotional intelligence, and self-esteem. Highlighting the importance of loving connection, her work also focuses on helping others create deeply connected and satisfying intimate relationships. Working from a transformative model that honors the body-mind-spirit connection, Dr. Manly offers holistic relationship and wellness seminars around the world. Her four captivating books, The Joy of Imperfect Love, Date Smart, Joy from Fear, and Aging Joyfully highlight Dr. Manly's empowering approach and profound expertise. Dr. Manly's expertise is also regularly cited in media outlets including The Wall Street Journal, The New York Times, The Los Angeles Times, USA Today, Forbes, Oprah, Newsweek, NBC, HuffPost, Reader's Digest, Psychology Today, Parade, GQ, Women's Health, Architectural Digest, Men's Health, and more Dr Manly joins us to talk about her latest book: The Joy of Imperfect Love: The Art of Creating Healthy, Securely Attached Relationships
On today's episode of the "Helping Families Be Happy" podcast, host Christopher Robbins, co-founder of Familius Publishing, husband, father of nine, author, fisherman, backpacker, and aspirational musician based in the Central Valley of California, talks to Dr. Carla Marie Manly about love and the important relationships in our lives, including ourselves. Dr. Carla Marie Manly, a practicing clinical psychologist and author based in Santa Rosa, CA. She focuses on a mindfulness-based holistic approach to help individuals achieve joy and balance from the inside out. She is the author of several books, including "Aging Joyfully," "Joy from Fear," "Date Smart," and an upcoming book on imperfect love and healthy relationships. Episode Highlights: 02:26: Christopher reads excerpts from the book "The Joy of Imperfect Love" introduction, highlighting societal pressure for perfect love and the false promises of quick fixes, leading to unconscious stress. 04:45: Christopher poses a question to Dr. Manly about why she wrote the book and the significance of its message, inviting her insights into the societal emphasis on perfectionism. 06:45: Carla responds, sharing the inspiration behind the book from her experiences as a clinician, wife, and family member, addressing the negative impact of perfectionism on relationships. 08:23: Carla explains the stepwise approach in the book, emphasizing self-love and the potential for individuals to earn secure attachment, leading to reduced anxiety, decreased depression, and increased joy in interpersonal relationships. 09:10: Carla defines love as a divine quality, replete with unselfishness, kindness, and goodness. She emphasizes the ideal of love as a guiding force across various spiritual beliefs. 10:13: Carla elaborates on imperfect love, describing it as a human attempt to reach the state of pure love. It involves a continuous quest to improve, learn from mistakes, and take actions guided by awareness and intention. 13:36: Carla introduces false love, often mistaken for pure love. She notes its prevalence in new relationships where initial projections fade, and individuals realize the love was not genuine. 14:45: Carla delves into self-love, emphasizing the need for self-awareness. She contrasts self-love with selfishness and explains that loving oneself requires understanding strengths, weaknesses, and boundaries. 18:01: Carla provides a personal example of self-love, encouraging acceptance of perceived weaknesses, emphasizing the importance of making friends with one's vulnerabilities and strengths. 20:28: Carla emphasizes the importance of humility and awareness in personal growth, stating that the willingness to learn, accept coaching, and seek therapy contributes to creating self-wealth rather than hindering progress with defensiveness. 23:25: Christopher transitions to discussing the subtitle of Carla's book, focusing on the term "attachment." He seeks clarification on the concept of secure attachment in relationships. 25:20: Carla delves into the challenges of interpersonal relationships for those with insecure attachment styles, highlighting the difficulties faced by individuals with disorganized attachment due to the absence of a secure and consistent caregiving environment. 26:49: Carla discusses her training as a Jungian psychologist and her journey into attachment theory, expressing her fascination with observing attachment dynamics in her clients' lives. She notes how healing attachment styles can transform relationships, even when partners have different attachment styles. 28:46: Carla expresses optimism by highlighting the brain's neuroplasticity, explaining that with effort and a desire for change, individuals can absolutely transform. She appreciates the privilege of working with people who want to evolve and become better versions of themselves. 29:29: Carla underscores the importance of the desire to evolve, labelling it as the foundation of joy and perfect love. She notes that the journey involves continuous self-improvement and the willingness to work on various aspects of oneself. 31:35: Christopher shares his interpretation of the metaphor, comparing individuals to rough stones that accumulate nicks and scratches through life experiences. 32:03: Carla emphasizes the power of choice, highlighting that individuals can choose how to channel the energy inherited from their parents. encourages acknowledging the lack of control over past events but emphasizes the power of choosing wisely each day to shape a different future. Key Points: The conversation revolves around imperfect love, self-awareness, and the power of choice in fostering personal growth and positive relationships. Carla explains attachment theory, emphasizing the impact of childhood attachment on adult relationships and the potential for earning secure attachment through self-awareness and self-work. Dr. Carla stresses that acknowledging imperfections, embracing self-awareness, and choosing to evolve contribute to becoming a better individual, partner, parent, and community member. Tweetable Quotes: "Embrace the privilege of continuous self-improvement in the realm of imperfect love." - Dr. Carla Manly "Acknowledge imperfections, embrace self-awareness, and choose to evolve every day in the journey of imperfect love." - Dr. Carla Manly "Love is a learnable skill. The transformative journey of self-discovery fosters resilience and emotional well-being." - Dr. Carla Manly Resources Mentioned Helping Families Be Happy Podcast Apple https://drcarlamanly.com/ Podcast Editing
Kathryn interviews Author Joseph M. Hoedel PhD.Derek Jeter, Michael Jordan and Serena Williams are just a few of the 34 inspirational athletes who made the cut in Sports Role Models: Book 1 from bestselling author Joseph Hoedel PhD. Readers will recognize many of the heroes Hoedel profiles, including Michael Phelps and Pat Summitt. Other chapters feature lesser known yet equally remarkable examples of the power of the human spirit, like Richard Norris Williams, who survived the Titanic and went on to win Wimbledon; or Bethany Hamilton, who lost her arm during a shark attack and returned to the waters to become a champion surfer. Each chapter is an engaging story about an athlete or coach who exemplifies positive traits that contributed to their success both on and off the playing field. For 20 years Hoedel has served as the CEO of Character Development and Leadership, an education-based curriculum company. He has created two educational programs that are used in more than 3,500 middle and high schools across the country.Kathryn also interviews Author Carla Marie Manly PhD.Who among us hasn't, at one time or another, felt stuck in an unhealthy relationship or lamented our inability to find that “perfect” someone? Clinical psychologist Dr. Carla Marie Manly knows the secret to creating genuine, joy-filled relationships — and it has nothing to do with perfection. She emphasizes that real love is messy and imperfect, and she offers profound, yet easily digestible insights for building healthy relationships. She provides research-backed insights, captivating case examples and empowering exercises to lead readers through an exploration of how attachment issues and unresolved trauma negatively impact both self-love and relationship quality. Dr. Manly guides readers into a transformative journey toward compassionate healthy connections. She has been cited by numerous media outlets, including The Wall Street Journal, the, NY Times, the Los Angeles Times, USA Today, Forbes, Oprah, Newsweek, NBC, HuffPost, Reader's Digest, Psychology Today and more.
Kathryn interviews Author Joseph M. Hoedel PhD.Derek Jeter, Michael Jordan and Serena Williams are just a few of the 34 inspirational athletes who made the cut in Sports Role Models: Book 1 from bestselling author Joseph Hoedel PhD. Readers will recognize many of the heroes Hoedel profiles, including Michael Phelps and Pat Summitt. Other chapters feature lesser known yet equally remarkable examples of the power of the human spirit, like Richard Norris Williams, who survived the Titanic and went on to win Wimbledon; or Bethany Hamilton, who lost her arm during a shark attack and returned to the waters to become a champion surfer. Each chapter is an engaging story about an athlete or coach who exemplifies positive traits that contributed to their success both on and off the playing field. For 20 years Hoedel has served as the CEO of Character Development and Leadership, an education-based curriculum company. He has created two educational programs that are used in more than 3,500 middle and high schools across the country.Kathryn also interviews Author Carla Marie Manly PhD.Who among us hasn't, at one time or another, felt stuck in an unhealthy relationship or lamented our inability to find that “perfect” someone? Clinical psychologist Dr. Carla Marie Manly knows the secret to creating genuine, joy-filled relationships — and it has nothing to do with perfection. She emphasizes that real love is messy and imperfect, and she offers profound, yet easily digestible insights for building healthy relationships. She provides research-backed insights, captivating case examples and empowering exercises to lead readers through an exploration of how attachment issues and unresolved trauma negatively impact both self-love and relationship quality. Dr. Manly guides readers into a transformative journey toward compassionate healthy connections. She has been cited by numerous media outlets, including The Wall Street Journal, the, NY Times, the Los Angeles Times, USA Today, Forbes, Oprah, Newsweek, NBC, HuffPost, Reader's Digest, Psychology Today and more.
Kathryn interviews Author Joseph M. Hoedel PhD.Derek Jeter, Michael Jordan and Serena Williams are just a few of the 34 inspirational athletes who made the cut in Sports Role Models: Book 1 from bestselling author Joseph Hoedel PhD. Readers will recognize many of the heroes Hoedel profiles, including Michael Phelps and Pat Summitt. Other chapters feature lesser known yet equally remarkable examples of the power of the human spirit, like Richard Norris Williams, who survived the Titanic and went on to win Wimbledon; or Bethany Hamilton, who lost her arm during a shark attack and returned to the waters to become a champion surfer. Each chapter is an engaging story about an athlete or coach who exemplifies positive traits that contributed to their success both on and off the playing field. For 20 years Hoedel has served as the CEO of Character Development and Leadership, an education-based curriculum company. He has created two educational programs that are used in more than 3,500 middle and high schools across the country.Kathryn also interviews Author Carla Marie Manly PhD.Who among us hasn't, at one time or another, felt stuck in an unhealthy relationship or lamented our inability to find that “perfect” someone? Clinical psychologist Dr. Carla Marie Manly knows the secret to creating genuine, joy-filled relationships — and it has nothing to do with perfection. She emphasizes that real love is messy and imperfect, and she offers profound, yet easily digestible insights for building healthy relationships. She provides research-backed insights, captivating case examples and empowering exercises to lead readers through an exploration of how attachment issues and unresolved trauma negatively impact both self-love and relationship quality. Dr. Manly guides readers into a transformative journey toward compassionate healthy connections. She has been cited by numerous media outlets, including The Wall Street Journal, the, NY Times, the Los Angeles Times, USA Today, Forbes, Oprah, Newsweek, NBC, HuffPost, Reader's Digest, Psychology Today and more.
Kathryn interviews Author Joseph M. Hoedel PhD.Derek Jeter, Michael Jordan and Serena Williams are just a few of the 34 inspirational athletes who made the cut in Sports Role Models: Book 1 from bestselling author Joseph Hoedel PhD. Readers will recognize many of the heroes Hoedel profiles, including Michael Phelps and Pat Summitt. Other chapters feature lesser known yet equally remarkable examples of the power of the human spirit, like Richard Norris Williams, who survived the Titanic and went on to win Wimbledon; or Bethany Hamilton, who lost her arm during a shark attack and returned to the waters to become a champion surfer. Each chapter is an engaging story about an athlete or coach who exemplifies positive traits that contributed to their success both on and off the playing field. For 20 years Hoedel has served as the CEO of Character Development and Leadership, an education-based curriculum company. He has created two educational programs that are used in more than 3,500 middle and high schools across the country.Kathryn also interviews Author Carla Marie Manly PhD.Who among us hasn't, at one time or another, felt stuck in an unhealthy relationship or lamented our inability to find that “perfect” someone? Clinical psychologist Dr. Carla Marie Manly knows the secret to creating genuine, joy-filled relationships — and it has nothing to do with perfection. She emphasizes that real love is messy and imperfect, and she offers profound, yet easily digestible insights for building healthy relationships. She provides research-backed insights, captivating case examples and empowering exercises to lead readers through an exploration of how attachment issues and unresolved trauma negatively impact both self-love and relationship quality. Dr. Manly guides readers into a transformative journey toward compassionate healthy connections. She has been cited by numerous media outlets, including The Wall Street Journal, the, NY Times, the Los Angeles Times, USA Today, Forbes, Oprah, Newsweek, NBC, HuffPost, Reader's Digest, Psychology Today and more.
Introduction:In this special Valentine's Day episode of Yoga Therapy Hour & Beyond, we are thrilled to introduce our guest, Carla Marie Manly, a yoga practitioner and clinical psychologist whose distinctive approach to her work has been transforming lives. Carla's journey into the realm of writing is nothing short of extraordinary—she crafts books inspired by her clients' real-life struggles. Her first masterpiece, "Joy from Fear," initially conceived as a doctoral dissertation, took eight years to evolve into a book tailored for a broader audience. Join us as we explore Carla's unique perspective on Attachment Theory and delve into the concept of "The Joy of Imperfect Love."Segment 1: Writing from Real-Life ExperiencesCarla's unconventional writing method: Drawing inspiration from clients' challenges."Joy from Fear" - Transition from academia to accessible wisdom.The power of storytelling in healing and personal growth.Segment 2: The Joy of Imperfect LoveExploration of "The Joy of Imperfect Love."Rooted in Carla's clinical practice and client experiences.Imperfect love, self-awareness, emotional intelligence, and rewiring for better relationships.Embracing wounds and nurturing strengths in relationships.Segment 3: Rewiring for Healthy AttachmentThe process of rewiring our brains for healthier attachments.Replacing shame and blame with curiosity about our wounds and relationship patterns.Self-attunement and attunement to loved ones for secure attachments.Segment 4: Attachment Theory and Self-ReflectionDeep dive into Attachment Theory.Carla's self-reflection exercise: Define love, caregiver definitions, safety, responsiveness, and attention to needs.Determining secure or insecure attachments from early experiences.Understanding how early patterns shape adult relationships. Topics you can choose from include: Yoga Therapy & Mental HealthYoga Therapy & Physical HealthSocial Justice in yoga & Yoga TherapyYoga/Ayurveda ToolboxYoga & Indian PhilosophyGlobal & Trending Yoga Therapy TopicsClick the link below to subscribe. It takes 10 seconds total.https://amywheeler.com/subscribe Check out Amy's website Visit Amy's training section on her website to check out the courses belowYoga therapy training courses 865-certified-yoga-therapist-program www.optimalstateyoganidra.comwww.TheOptimalState.com Contact with Carla Marie Manly: https://drcarlamanly.com www.OpenHandInstitute.comwww.TherapeuticYogaWorks.comwww.NydiasYogaTherapyStudio.com
Dr. Carla Marie Manly—psychologist, life fulfillment expert, and author—resides in Sonoma County, CA. In addition to her clinical practice focusing on relationships and personal transformation, Dr. Manly is deeply invested in her roles as a consultant and speaker. With warm, direct approach--plus a dose of humor—Dr. Manly enjoys supporting others in the ever-evolving journey of life. Her three extraordinary books, Date Smart, Joy from Fear, and Aging Joyfully—plus her 2024 release The Joy of Imperfect Love --highlight Dr. Manly's empowering approach and profound expertise. Life can be a journey of consciously crafting the best version of oneself. Wellness and joy do not occur by chance; they are fostered by manifesting one's true light with courage and strength. By creating a respectful, aware relationship with oneself and others, the body, mind, and spirit thrive. ~ Dr. Carla Marie Manly
Today we're talking with Carla Marie Manly and her books about Joy and Aging. This gets a bit therapizing for a minute (she is a therapist) but it has tons of great information. --- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/cameron-cowan/support
On today's episode of the "Helping Families Be Happy" podcast, host Dr. Carla Marie Manly, a clinical psychologist, wellness advocate, and author based in Sonoma County, California is going to talk to Robin Hall. She has written a book called "The Littlest Weaver." Robin describes herself as someone who enjoys creating and has a variety of creative outlets such as writing, quilting, and basket making. Episode Highlights: 02:39: Carla asks Robin about her basket weaving skills. Robin explains that she started weaving baskets in 2016 when she took a class at the Community Center with a kind woman named Susan. 04:00: Robin discusses her favorite color, green, and her experience living in a less green environment. 04:18: Carla asks about the connection between green and Robin's book, "The Loose Weaver. 05:10: Robin explains how the Tohoku tsunami and earthquake in Japan inspired her to write the story of a man who moved away from the sea to heal. 06:30: Robin shares details of her book, "The Littlest Weaver," and displays a spread with beautiful illustrations of the Appalachian area. 07:49: Carla discusses the 10 habits of happy families and asks how Robin's book fits into those habits. 08:23: Robin emphasizes on the themes of healing, small acts of kindness, and the power of art in her book. 09:31: Robin shares how she hopes her book will inspire families to create together and plans to create videos demonstrating weaving techniques. 12:02: Robin envisions her book as a source of joy and recognition of sadness, helping families move towards joy and unity while appreciating each other's presence. 13:00: Robin expresses the desire for carpets that children can create themselves, introducing the idea of a coloring page for creating their own carpets. 13:19: Carla admits the fear of acknowledging grief and emphasizes the importance of experiencing joy during the grieving process. They mention that joy and grief can coexist and that moments of joy can be found even while mourning. 14:18: Carla mentions that grief can extend beyond the loss of a human being, including the loss of pets or relationships. 16:15: Robin highlights the significance of persistence and following one's passion in any field or role. 3 Key Points: Robin briefly introduces her book and reads a short passage from the introduction. Carla discusses the connection between creativity and healing and asks about the potential use of the book for families in need of healing. Robin discovered the story of 'The Little Sweeper' after the Tohoku tsunami and earthquake in Japan in 2011, a tragic event that touched the lives of many. Tweetable Quotes: "Taking pottery courses and engaging in repetitive activities like knitting calms me down and bring me joy." - Robin Hall "I love exploring different patterns and tools in pottery, it's a soothing and creative process." - Robin Hall "Creating baskets and other handmade items has become my passion, filling my basement with a variety of beautiful creations." - Robin Hall "I absolutely adore the color green; it's my favorite color and I find it incredibly soothing." - Robin Hall "Living in a green environment is essential to me, as I felt a bit out of place in the dry, desert-like surroundings of 29 Palms." - Robin Hall "The book highlights the resilience and courage of a father who returns to his devastated home, showcasing the strength of the human spirit." - Robin Hall Resources Mentioned Helping Families Be Happy Podcast Apple Familius.com Podcast Editing
On today's episode of the "Helping Families Be Happy" podcast, host Dr. Carla Marie Manly, a clinical psychologist, wellness advocate, and author based in Sonoma County, California is going to talk to Louise Sattler, a content creator dedicated to spreading fun and joy for families and children, particularly those with special needs and talents. Episode Highlights: 01:22 - Louise compares herself to Gumby, emphasizing her flexibility, curiosity, and constant learning. She mentions her belief in being a lifelong learner and her generous nature. 04:12 - Carla acknowledges the beautiful charts and resources provided by Louise including sign expressions in English and Spanish, as well as important words and a bookmark. 08:02: Carla and Louise discuss the importance of communication cards for first responders, parents, and kids. 08:58: Carla mentions the foundational values of healthy families and asks how Louise's work contributes to family happiness. 09:28: Louise acknowledges that their work as a psychologist is not always about delivering happy news, as they often have to inform parents about difficulties their children may be facing, such as autism. However, Louise finds satisfaction in providing parents with resources, connections, and support during challenging times. 10:57: Louise expresses how providing solace to parents going through difficult times brings them comfort. She mentions her personal experience as both a parent and a professional, highlighting the challenges she faced with her own child's reading difficulties. 11:35: Carla commends Louise for naturally addressing the silver lining in their work, which involves providing tools and resources to families. 12:22: Louise emphasizes the importance of teamwork and collaboration in supporting families and children. She mentions relying on a team of experts and professionals to provide comprehensive support for parents and children going through challenges. 14:08: Louise suggests referring to children with special needs as having "unique challenges" or "unique talents" instead of disabilities. She emphasizes the importance of recognizing and celebrating the different lenses through which individuals perceive the world. 14:32 - Carla shares a personal anecdote about their sister with Marfan syndrome, highlighting her exceptional intelligence, creativity, and stamina. She emphasizes the value of focusing on individuals' unique talents and what they bring to the world. 15:22: Louise discusses the importance of resilience and acknowledges the grieving process that parents may go through when their expectations for parenting differ from their reality. She emphasizes the need for professionals to understand and support parents during this process. 16:01: Louise encourages professionals to acknowledge and support parents through the grieving process that may arise from having a child with special needs. 17:03: Resilience is not about being Teflon or unaffected by challenges but rather accepting the circumstances and finding a way to move forward. 18:47: Having realistic expectations is important; Louise mentions how some people struggle with small everyday challenges, hindering their resilience. 19:23: Louise shares an example of someone becoming overly upset about getting the wrong shopping cart, emphasizing the need to move on from small inconveniences. 22:39: The learning tools, the literacy levels, and the care that is taken towards early young child literacy as well as the young adults, there are so many great books. 23:11: There are so many great books for parents and grandparents. As per Louise, a good book is one that she reads, and she is willing to stay past her bedtime to still be reading on the adult level. 3 Key Points: Louise talks about her dedication to supporting children with disabilities and unique challenges, emphasizing the importance of seeing the world through different lenses and being inclusive. Louise highlights the importance of pulling oneself up and moving forward with grace and dignity, without dwelling on the past. Louise loves reviewing books, puzzles, games and traveling. She talks about picking out authors writing these children's books on levels that are very interesting to both parents and child. Tweetable Quotes: "Resilience is not about being Teflon; it's about accepting what life throws at you and finding the strength to move forward." - Louise "Support from others can be the fuel that helps us build resilience in the face of challenges." - Louise "Sometimes the smallest things can feel monumental, hindering our ability to bounce back. Realistic expectations are key to fostering resilience." - Louise "Don't let minor inconveniences become volcanic eruptions. Keep your focus on what truly matters." - Louise "Resilience is not about avoiding pain; it's about facing it with grace and dignity and finding the courage to move forward." – Louise "There are a lot of books that I think are great for professionals as well, on topics like ADHD and autism." - Louise Resources Mentioned Helping Families Be Happy Podcast Apple https://louisesattler.com/ Podcast Editing
Dr. Carla Marie Manly—psychologist, life fulfillment expert, and author—resides in Sonoma County, CA. In addition to her clinical practice focusing on relationships and personal transformation, Dr. Manly is deeply invested in her roles as a consultant and speaker. With warm, direct approach--plus a dose of humor—Dr. Manly enjoys supporting others in the ever-evolving journey of life. Her three extraordinary books, Date Smart, Joy from Fear, and Aging Joyfully—plus her 2024 release The Joy of Imperfect Love --highlight Dr. Manly's empowering approach and profound expertise. Life can be a journey of consciously crafting the best version of oneself. Wellness and joy do not occur by chance; they are fostered by manifesting one's true light with courage and strength. By creating a respectful, aware relationship with oneself and others, the body, mind, and spirit thrive. ~ Dr. Carla Marie Manly
In today's episode of the "Helping Families Be Happy" podcast, host Dr. Carla Marie Manly is going to talk to Terry Whalin. He will be talking with us about many things, including his new book proposals that sell. Episode Highlights: 01:01: Terry loves books and loves publishing and that's something he started at a very young age. 02:58: Terry shares how the book "Jesus Be A revolutionary" changed his whole view in life. 04:10: Terry shares how he joined Wycliffe Bible Translators out of college, and he spent 17 years with them. 04:33: Terry explains how he had a genuine love and relationship with God that he didn't have, and so that's why he needed to get a Bible and begin to sing those songs and go that direction in his life as well. 05:08: In Terry's publishing life. He has written biographies on people like Billy Graham and Chuck Colson and John Perkins and Luis Palau, and people like that. 05:24: Terry has co-authored books with more than a dozen people over the years, so books have really driven a lot of his life. 06:14: Terry had written about 50 books for traditional publishers, but he had never worked inside a publishing company before. 06:23: About 15-16 years ago, Terry was hired as the acquisition's editor at David C Cook in Colorado Springs and it gave him a look inside publishing that he had never seen before. 07:31: Terry wrote book proposals that sold originally in 2004, just as a frustrated editor because he wasn't getting the kind of submissions from authors that he really needed then. 09:12: As far as who the audience is, what they are going to do to sell the book, all those kinds of things, you can't just write a book. 10:05: There are over 4500 new books that are published every day. A publishing plan will help you not to get lost in 4500 books per day. It will help you float to the top rather than sink to. 11:23: If you have a plan, execute your plan, then that's where you are going to find your readers out there and really help people with the stuff you are putting in your books. 12:12: Terry has published more than a dozen children's books, and he knows that that's a very important area to people as parents read those books. 14:04: Terry shares how he benefitted from reading books to his children. 15:48: Terry wants to encourage authors to envision where their book is in the bookstore. 3 Key Points: Terry explains how to get a book launched or why their favorite book was launched. Terry shares how publishing has changed a lot since 2004. Terry's mission is to store enjoyment by helping authors be successful, and he is one of the reasons every book needs a book proposal out there. Tweetable Quotes: "One of the things that really drives me day in, and day out is the fact that books can change people's lives." – Terry "I can think of many times in my life when the right book came across my path and gave me sometimes, I wanted, sometimes I not so much wanted, i.e.; a wakeup call." - Terry "We go to the library or the bookstore and come back with a whole bunch of books and read them over and over to our kids." - Terry Resources Mentioned Helping Families Be Happy Podcast Apple Familius.com Terry Whalin Podcast Editing
Crafting, the technical definition, is to make or produce something with care, skill, or ingenuity. For many, the thought immediately goes to crocheting, knitting, sewing, or anything handmade. The act alone is thought of as something joyful and creative; depending on who you ask, it could actually be considered fun. But there is another side to crafting, something that we often don't think about or may even know about: the benefits to our psyche. Our mental health. Dr. Carla Marie Manly is a world-renowned clinical psychologist known for her holistic, body-mind-spirit approach; she specializes in improving professional and personal relationships through mindfulness and healthy communication skills. Viewing self-development as the foundation for optimal wellness, her work blends traditional psychotherapy with alternative mindfulness practices to support inner freedom, awareness, and, most of all, balance. Dr. Manley is the author of three Best Selling books: Date Smart: Transform Your Relationships and Love FearlesslyJoy from Fear: Create the Life of Your Dreams by Making Fear Your FriendAging Joyfully: A Woman's Guide to Optimal Health, Relationships, and Fulfillment for Her 50s and BeyondDisclaimer: This is not psychological advice, as this is not a client, therapist relationship. This is simply psychoeducational and informational. Thank you so much for listening. I hope you have enjoyed this episode. New episodes are released weekly on Sundays. Also, stay in the KNOW by subscribing to our email and newsletter blasts; you will receive a FREE Download copy of The Earning Potential Assessment Template. Credits:Music: Islabonita by An JoneVanessa S. - Ph.D Host
On today's episode of the “Helping Families Be Happy” podcast, host Dr. Carla Marie Manly, talks with Christine Babinec, who will be talking about her new book “Want a Hug? Consent and Boundaries for Kids”. Christine shares her views on when a boundary crossing has occurred. She answers the questions: How do we help a child? How do we empower them to come forward without shame, embarrassment, and guilt no matter how minor or major that boundary crossing is? Episode Highlights 1.20: Christine's practice is about combining prevention work and treatment within a social justice scope, and she is trying to figure out how can we prevent abuse and harm from happening in the world. How can we effectively treat it and make sure that we are bringing marginalized people and hearing the voices of the people who have been hurt? 4.55: As adults, sometimes we see a child and know the child needs an answer and sometimes the answer or explanation becomes very cerebral and wordy. But the children's books can be so perfect in giving us the simple, concise language that children can understand and process, says Carla. 9.57: When you see your child not want to be hugged just have a lighthearted general conversation to get a beat and a read on what your kid is comfortable with in general because a lot of times we assume kids are soft and cuddly, but some of them just aren't and they don't like to have that foisted on them. 11.13: We often don't talk to kids about how you can show kindness and love and generosity and affection without physical contact, says Christine. 12.21: Carla believes in talking to the relatives in advance saying. She is working on boundaries at home. So, if the little one is showing signs of having strong boundaries, please applaud them and respect that they're learning how to take that with them through life. 14.49: Christine also encourages grown-ups to not apologize when their child doesn't want to give a hug or cuddle because this may communicate to the child that they might have done something wrong, or it gives them a mixed message. 17.28: One of the things that Christine have made addressed in the book is that a lot of kids are very afraid that they are going to get in trouble because that's what perpetrators do when they convince the child that they have done something wrong. 19.40: Sometimes it's later that you realize, that happened and that shouldn't have happened or didn't feel right and then children and adults tend to feel guilty for not having stopped it right then and there, says Carla. 21.14: There could be a power differential even between a much larger child and a much smaller child in the same grade, Christine. 23.20: In slippery slopes, there is not a clear demarcation of when the hug turned into something that was much more inappropriate. Christine shares her views on how she would coach parents to help themselves or maybe forgive themselves and help them explain to their child. 24.40: We want to live in a world where we teach our kids that they are grown-ups and that they can trust, and that the world is a safe place. But then we also have to talk to them about certain realities. 27.34: Your instinct could be crystal clear on a lot of different things. But when you have complex emotions and complex relationships involved, this is where Christine worries that people will blame themselves that she should have had an instinct. 28.56: If your instinct comes up, pay attention to it and notice it. If you override your instinct or didn't get an instinct on and something happens, never blame yourself. 30.27: Christine's book is to set the foundation for healthy boundaries, learning about consent in naturalistic, developmentally appropriate ways that are fun and engaging and stuff that child is already doing now. 3 Key Points When we have conversations with kids and the material is approachable everything changes. It sets the foundation to have more complicated conversations later, and it opens the developmentally appropriate ways for them, says Christine. We want to empower kids to say no, but we have to remember kids are not responsible for protecting themselves, says Christine. Silence is not consent. Persuasion is not consent. Consent is only present when it's freely given, reversible, informed, enthusiastic and specific, says Christine. Tweetable Quotes “We do all great work to set the foundation for consent and boundaries, and then we don't explicitly talk about it in terms of bodies and relationships.” – Christine “The developmentally appropriate way is so critical because if we are either speaking beneath the child's level or over a child's level, we're missing an opportunity for attunement.” - Carla “Consent and boundaries are the foundations of all healthy relationships is my favorite line. But upon reflection, my favorite line from the book is, it's not my fault.” – Christine “70s and 80s were all about stranger danger because we don't like to think about the fact that often when abuse happens, it's from someone we know.” – Christine Resources Mentioned Helping Families be Happy Podcast Apple https://www.christinebabineclpc.com/ Podcast Editing
In today's episode of the "Helping Families Be Happy" podcast, host Dr. Carla Marie Manly is going to talk to Charlotte Offsay. She will be talking about her work with Instagram and her literacy platform. Episode Highlights 1.33: Instagram is a wonderful space and community where people share the books that they are interested in, the books that they are reading, and she makes recommendations based on the books that her children and she loves. 2.05: Books are a fabulous way to enter a conversation with a child and discuss what's going on in their minds and enter naturally into a conversation. 4.35: As per Carla, we still have picture books as adults, and we just call them photography books and images share so much. 5.19: Carla explains as an Instagram influencer why does she think it's important to read together for family happiness? 6.30: On emotional level, reading together brings calmness and tranquility to the end of our day. It can definitely lead to lots of giggles and fun and silliness too, says Charlotte. 8.16: Being immersed in the kid-lit world, Charlotte gets to see so many of the new books coming out and it gets to meet the wonderful authors that she works and writes and interacts with. 9.47: Through the picture books Charlotte got a window into what else is going on around the world like traditions or cultures she and her children both got to experience that together. 10.43: Reading and interacting and looking at a book offers a way to explore curiosity and see it in a different light and slow down. 12.44: When you find a piece in a book that you can identify with and say that person is like me, it's one of the most precious parts of reading, says Carla. 14.08: Charlotte is lucky to get books sent to her by fabulous publishers, and she just absolutely loves getting a stack of new picture books and pouring over them and getting excited to share them with her kids and with people who she has gotten to know online. 16.02: There are the small everyday moments that also need to be celebrated and recognized, says Charlotte. 18.15: There are so many different types of books out there and there is something for everyone and that can be a such a wonderful experience for everyone, says Charlotte. 3 Key Points Picture books are meant to be read a loud and meant to be shared in a special way and they offer a unique connection, says Charlotte. Every child wants and needs to see and deserves to see themselves reflected in the pages of a book, says Charlotte. Charlotte's next book A Grandma's Magic is a lyrical ode to the magic of the relationship and all that a grandma brings into our lives through the small moments. Tweetable Quotes "Young children need literacy and books, and books offer windows and mirrors and discussion points."- Charlotte "The more that you read, the more you're going to teach and share and open up a young child's world." – Charlotte "From skin color to eye color to body size to pets, it's so wonderful to see someone who's life mirrors yours." – Carla "I tend to write about the things in my life that consume me, whether that's my children or me and what's going on with them." - – Charlotte Resources Mentioned Helping Families be Happy Podcast Apple http://charlotteoffsay.com/ https://www.instagram.com/picturebookrecommendations/?hl=en Podcast Editing
A #podcastguest that was so nice, we had to interview her twice!Welcome back to Dr. Carla Marie Manly. For a quick refresh, Dr. Carla Marie Manly is a clinical psychologist and relationship expert who makes her home in Sonoma County, California. In addition to her clinical practice, Dr. Manly is deeply invested in her roles as an author, consultant, and speaker. A meditation teacher, yoga instructor, and lover of the natural world, her passion inspires people to live their dreams. Her holistic, self-development method builds resilience, emotional intelligence, and self-esteem as the foundation for optimal wellness. She lives by her motto: “Wellness and resilience do not occur by chance; they are fostered with awareness, courage, and inner strength. Overall wellbeing occurs by creating a respectful, aware relationship with oneself and others.” She is an accomplished writer, with three books published that highlight her progressive expertise:•Joy from Fear, •Aging Joyfully, and •Date Smart Her work is featured in top-notch media outlets including NBC News, The Washington Post, Oprah mag, The Los Angeles Times, Reader's Digest, The New York Times, and other iconic publications.Today, we chat about a variety of timely topics including self-leadership, alignment, inner dialogue, and being a champion vs. a critic.She leaves us with some encouraging words when she says, "Although challenging, I've discovered more and more over time how much my difficult past has given me so many of the tools I use today! Words of wisdom: Love--genuine love--is action."Learn more and connect with Dr. Manly here: Website: https://www.drcarlamanly.comInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/drcarlamanly/Twitter: https://www.twitter.com/drcarlamanly/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/drcarlamanlyLinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/carla-marie-manly-8682362b/YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCQmSoiWGJEBasrIV3lrPsXw Get bonus content on Patreon Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
On today's episode of the "Helping Families Be Happy" podcast, host Dr. Carla Marie Manly talks with guest Stephanie Campisi. She will be talking with us about her wonderful new book, Quacks Like a Duck. Episode Highlights 1.41: Opportunity presented itself, so Stephanie moved to the US from Australia in 2014 and she has been having a wonderful time. 1.51: Throughout her travels, Stephanie has been collecting interesting stories and overheads and snippets and turning them into books. 2.07: Stephanie has lived in quite a few states in the US and has traveled almost half of now and working on the rest. 3.53: Reading and writing are how Stephanie makes sense of the world, and she thinks it's so true for so many people even if you are not necessarily an author, but you write letters or things like that. 5.15: Stephanie looks at the recurring motives that shine through because she has several books out through Familius and tends to be loved together, laugh together, and play together. 7.33: Stephanie's perspective has been really interesting in Australia and being an Australian and what that identity is now that she is elsewhere. 8.35: Stephanie has been taking Vegemite to the US schools and having brave souls try it and it's always hilarious. They eat Vegemite to keep their vitamins up. 11.10: The essence of relationship is when we can take a topic and start dissecting it whether it is about books or some little curiosities, says Carla. 12.11: Stephanie mostly travels around the schools in rural Eastern Tennessee and in a lot of cases she is the first author that the kids have met and so it's wonderful. 13.40: There has been a little bit of time in the making quacks, but Stephanie does have a book in the work that hopefully will be on shelves and is absolutely inspired by her son who is three years old. 15.15: When Stephanie came from another country and made a new home in America, that belonging, and acceptance were a big piece for her. She shares if her books somehow create more of a sense of belonging and acceptance in her life or not. 17.35: When Stephanie came to the US, it was kind of like a single-swim situation. 19.41: Social-emotional learning helps kids learn how to get along with each other and make friends, create healthy relationship dynamics, and learn to exist alongside each other in the world. 20.12: Quacks like a duck is a brand-new release and it's not actually about a duck. It is about Petunia the platypus who shows up at her very first party in the US, says Stephanie. 22.10: Sometimes we want to label everything. We want to put something in a box so that we are comfortable knowing what this is, says Carla. 26.22: Books are really safe way to explore little things with children, particularly if you are with a trusted adult who can help you work through them. 27.18: In Quacks Like a Duck, we have petunia going to her party but that applies in so many different situations where you're the new person in an unfamiliar situation and that can apply to kids in so many different experiences throughout their lives, says Stephanie. 29.00: Stephanie feels picture books give us permission to be kids again and feel like that is one of the joys of being a picture book author. 3 Key Points Stephanie talks about her journey and what motivated her to become an author. You feel yourself and what you are meant to be at Familius and that's why we gravitated towards Familius. The energy at Familius is very loving, very inclusive, and very family oriented, says Stephanie. Different people can approach the same book, but nobody is ever going to approach it in the same way. We are in different moods when we are reading the book, says Stephanie. Tweetable Quotes "Your reading and writing passion helps you bring components to life, in your body, in your mind and spirit." - Carla "It is really beautiful that there is some energy that brings people to Familius because that energy is like let's create books that help make the world a better place." – Carla "Once you get outside the familiar bubble of comfort, you have a different lens to see and understand everything." - Stephanie "Social-emotional learning lens is authenticity for how to embrace your truth, know who you are, stand in your truth, and not need to dress up. You can just be yourself." - Carla "When we are connecting with the child, we are also connecting to lost or thirsty parts of ourselves, and their books work in a way that more the 500 pages book can't do." - Carla Resources Mentioned Helping Families be Happy Podcast Apple Stephanie Campisi: Website Podcast Editing
In today's episode of the “Helping Families Be Happy” podcast, host Dr. Carla Marie Manly, a practicing Clinical Psychologist, Wellness Advocate, and Author based in Sonoma County, California talks with guest Matthew Winner, a Head Podcaster for A Kids Book Company where he leads the company in creating a podcast network dedicated to helping kids. They talk about his journey as a kid and what it takes in the circumstance to repair the harm that was caused to him Episode Highlights 01:40 – Matthew says he is a great fan of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy - CBT and loves that he can reflect and see where he was in his childhood and applies it to where he is now. 04:00 – Dr. Carla says that they are not blaming or shaming anyone, they are simply saying, there are things that you can do in your life to ensure yourself or your family are happier. 05:15 - The breakthrough for Matthew was a book that his therapist introduced to called Hold Me Tight by Dr. Sue Johnson. 07:00 - The beauty of attachment is that we can create secure attachment. We can create it no matter how old we are. 10:40 – Matthew mentions that wherever we are, in our life journey, it's liberating to say that the class was doing the best they could, just that they didn't know better. 12:40 – Dr. Carla asks Matthew to explain ‘Restorative Justice' to the listeners. 15:20 - Restorative Justice work is to repair the harm so that we can look at the action that happened and say that it was wrong, but the individual is not a good or bad person. They are a person who committed this action while being aware of it. 17:10 – Dr. Carla tells Matthew that he mirrors what he said, he looks at the harm done, no blame, no shame but he addresses the person injured so that they can come from a place of empowerment and cure for the long-term. 19:20 – Matthew thinks that there's a lot of value there to healing together for them to say, that both the persons that were harmed and the person that is responsible for the harm can both be hurting and both need to heal. 21:24 - When Matthew takes that thing that he practices with Dr. Cara and applies it to talk to his parents or wife or kids or colleagues. He can start breaking down the fear or resistance around them because he has already got a notch on his belt from doing it in therapy. 22:39 - If we're practicing healthy loving skills in a safe family, then we can go out and practice them, at school, in friendships, or at work too. 25:30 – Matthew thinks that the reason why he has been working with children for so long is that it is incredibly humbling where he just learns and learns. They are exceptional at exposing his insecurities. 27:40 - A way we protect ourselves is by pushing others away, fighting, and by trying to make sure that no one causes us further harm. 29:40 – Matthew reveals that their kids' podcasts have a podcast on emotions in coalition with young children and their grownups in part about destigmatizing therapy but also about allowing ourselves to feel big emotions. 31:00 - The work that they do in their Kids Co. is they say kids are ready and they make things for kids to talk about, says Matthew. 32:00 – Matthew mentions that the fact that he can see adults trying to protect him in his life, is what draws him to different hosts about the different podcasts that we have. 34:10 – Matthew suggests empowering children by giving them the language that they understand. If this is the word for that thing, then explain it to them, but don't call it something else. That is a piece of currency that they'll use to navigate the world, so deny them that tool. 35:55 – Dr. Carla does love all of the principles that Matthew has been bringing about on how to empower children and see them as unique individuals who are innately wise. 36:50 – Matthew says all the adults that maybe weren't there for him, how would they have ever known that 30 years later he would be an adult that could be here for him? 38:30 – Matthew wants to make sure that we all agree to learn together and to take on that position of learner. Three Key Points Matthew says that this indigenous practice of repairing harm, where harm was caused not seeking to punish but seeking to acknowledge that we are part of a community and as a community, we all need to be able to move forward together so being able to ask what it takes in this circumstance to repair the harm that was caused for Matthew. Between that repairing harm and working hard to see the best in people, to be able to love his parents and say, they were doing the best. They could and love them in a different way now and say he needs them to continue to do the best that they can and Matthew also will try to do the best that he can. In the classroom community, they all become much more self-aware, as well as class aware that they are an ecosystem that they are all feeding off one another. Similarly, in the justice system, all of us in this community/society are just part of a fishbowl we're all part of a singular ecosystem that affects everything. We must recognize that we siblings can heal each other and also that it can go upward that my kids can heal me, making sure that I am communicating with them. Dr. Carla says that when we look at Maslow's hierarchy of needs, first and foremost comes Safety. We want to be safe, and we want to be loved because we are truly and deeply loved in the most beautiful sense of the word. We know we are safe because someone who truly loves us might make mistakes, but they won't purposefully harm us. Let's talk about sexual abuse from the age of five because around two to five children by the age of 5 or 10 will have an experience with it and the number is huge. So instead, why wouldn't we talk about this? Matthew states that he was a victim of sexual abuse, and it took him up to the age of 36 to be able to through therapy and notify authorities. It was past time, there was nothing that the state of Pennsylvania could do at that point. Tweetable Quotes “I think that I've really pushed up against this notion that our parents did the best they could.” - Matthew Winner “We didn't have parents who knew anything about attachment. They didn't know how to create secure attachment.” - Dr. Carla Marie Manly “I'm not judging any of the pupil's choices, it's just realizing that sometimes in life we don't do our best.” - Dr. Carla Marie Manly “You can't change other people; you can only change yourself.” - Matthew Winner “You said one of my favorite words Fishbowl and another favorite, which is Ecosystem, right?” - Dr. Carla Marie Manly “Children are exceptional in exposing our shortcomings, and our sensitivities.” - Dr. Carla Marie Manly “We have a kids' podcast about current events and about big topics like school shootings and racism and things like that and all of it.” - Matthew Winner “I have come to understand that there's no way in my childhood that I wasn't communicating to my parents my needs.” - Matthew Winner “Don't talk down to your children, talk up to your children. It is such a beautiful statement.” - Dr. Carla Marie Manly
In today's episode of the “Helping Families Be Happy” podcast, host Dr. Carla Marie Manly, a practicing Clinical Psychologist, Wellness Advocate, and Author based in Sonoma County, California talks with Author Linda Cutting who talks about Adoption and her book – ‘A is for Always'. Episode Highlights 01:21 – Linda was professionally a Concert Pianist for many years and wrote a memoir in 1997, which was published by HarperCollins. 03:10 – Dr. Carla asks that in terms of adoption and how it impacted Linda and her children's lives, what are some of the biggest gifts for her and her children? 05:40 – Linda says that she tried to address some of the harder and more challenging aspects of adoption in this book – ‘A is for Adoption'. 07:05 - There are many issues with exploring adoption, it's been a wonderful way for Linda to have her family, especially after she had two pregnancies and miscarried. She then adopted as she knew kids in the world needed families. 09:30 - Whether it's an adoptive family or, a DNA family, nobody wants to be left out. We all want to feel safe, loved, and secure. 11:40 - One of the things that I was very serious about addressing was the difficulties that each of my kids had about adoption in school. 13:20 – Linda mentions that America has one of the most mixed race, mixed ethnic groups, cultures, and populations of any country on Earth which gives the message of inclusiveness. 16:00 - Linda refers to one of the scenes from a Chinese film where the father explains to her adopted daughter through a metaphor of a tree that has two families and they're both very important families and both are real. 17:50 - The other important aspect of adoption Linda thinks is to talk to your kids about and it can be painful but they need to hear it from you is the identical letter K. 21:10 - Fortunately, we now live in a world where we are far more inclusive and we are far more willing to talk about things that we didn't talk about 20 years ago. 22:10 – Linda tells where listeners can reach her, they can find the book on the Familius Publishing Website or the Workman Website or Amazon, and your local independent bookstores. Key Points Linda says she is very grateful to her children's birth parents because they gave them life but she thinks the truth is that every adoption begins with loss. So eventually she realized that the bringing up of birth parents brought up the loss, and that's probably why they didn't want to hear it quite as much because they don't want to be reminded of that. Linda thinks one of the reasons she has brought this topic up so much is because one of the problems with adoption has been the secrecy around it and a sense of shame. She didn't want that to be part of her kids' story or their lives. So in this book – ‘A is for Always', Linda is trying to promote openness and conversations with adoptive parents and their kids. Dr. Carla says that the reason you need to pick up this book is that the illustrations are so beautiful, as well as the energy of the text, which is very loving and welcoming. Whether you're reading it to a newborn, an infant, a five-year-old, to a 10-year-old it would really carry a lot of love and meaning. Tweetable Quotes “We adopted him as a newborn in the States and our daughter's 17 and we adopted her as a one-year-old in China.” - Linda Cutting “I didn't want my kids to feel ashamed about questions they might have. So, Q was for questions you may want to shout.” - Linda Cutting “Transparency and curiosity, those sound like very good places to be in any parenting but particularly in adoptive parenting.” - Dr. Carla Marie Manly “My daughter really wants animal illustrations so any child can relate.” - Linda Cutting “Makes sense that your book is doing so well because ‘A is for Always' will resonate with the family that wants to really say we are inclusive.” - Dr. Carla Marie Manly “Inclusivity is so important in an overall way not just for adoptive families, but for all of us. Invite and include others in our lives.” - Linda Cutting “It is about connection and it's about growing together.” - Dr. Carla Marie Manly Resources Mentioned Helping Families be Happy Podcast: Apple Familius Publishing: Website Workman Website LinkedIn Instagram Facebook Linda Cutting: Website Twitter Instagram Podcast Editing
In today's episode of the “Helping Families Be Happy” podcast, host Dr. Carla Marie Manly, a practicing Clinical Psychologist, Wellness Advocate, and Author based in Sonoma County, California talks with guest Apurva Shrivasta about her life as a Book Reviewer. Episode Highlights 01:38 – Apurva is a UX Designer by profession, and works for a Credit Card Company. Other than that, she's also a book reviewer on Instagram. 03:13 – Apurva's professional work is very similar to what one does in their day-to-day life and in motherhood. 05:09 – Just being their (Children) biggest cheerleaders is all about parenting and all these intricacies of reaching the child, states Apurva. 07:17 – Apurva's children believe in the power of reading, and she's so fascinated to see this valuable trait naturally emerge in her family, highlights Apurva. 09:23 – Dr. Carla about Apurva, no matter the child's age when she's reading with them, she has created sort of a bubble or cocoon in her own world where the two of them are exploring whatever's in the book together. She's on an adventure in her own world. 11:10 - It does take a lot, not just cognitive energy but also emotional energy to tune into a child that way, says Dr. Carla. 13:25 – Dr. Carla enquires about how can toddlers learn problem-solving. 14:38 - It's very important to see how our kids react to certain things, and how do they carry themselves with confidence because that's important, says Apurva. 16:49 – Apurva highlights that just being in that moment present with them and not thinking about anything else and giving that undivided attention is important. 18:10 - Just being there with the kids is the most important thing without the intervention of technology, says Apurva. 20:34 - Kids have a brain where they can wander. So, why not be a model for them to display what the world is like and how it is so beautiful, states Apurva. 22:00 – Apurva shares her opinion on which book is better in certain age ranges. 23:20 – Apurva wrote a book which is, about how does a child's brain works? 25:00 – They do like a lot of Montessori education for both her daughters. Three Key Points Apurva highlights - reading in itself creates that bonding and it's really important. We can really like read aloud or let them (Children) read on their own if they are a little elder, but when we're reading with them, we're creating our own world. It's significantly benefitted our child's brain and ours as well and we can see that wire but then it goes from our child to our brain and then naturally it prepares them for their academic success. Apurva says - reading is one way where we express our affection and gratitude. We're given the opportunity that we can read it to them. It's like we should be really grateful for that and keep developing that habit little by little, even if it is like five minutes, 10 minutes. She thinks it's more than enough and when we see that smile on their face when we're together and not busy in our phones or doing other things and ignoring them, it's blissful. Apurva shares what makes a really great children's book - first the story the characters that we bring in, what is the story depicting and also the ups and down. There's not a story that wouldn't have a down and then how do they shine up and brings out the moral out of that. So, all those milestones are really important in a story. Tweetable Quotes “Being the child's advocate or cheerleader, is really important.” – Dr. Carla Marie Manly “The more books, the better it is.” – Apurva Shrivasta “You are creating your own world when you're reading with a child.” - Apurva Shrivasta “You can get creative with reading.” - Apurva Shrivasta “It is joyful, but sometimes it is tiring.” - Apurva Shrivasta “5 to 10 minutes of reading can make a difference in a child's life.” - Apurva Shrivasta “Integrate practical life along with that. I think that's really important.” - Apurva Shrivasta “Empathy and compassion are a theme that we really put more emphasis on.” - Apurva Shrivasta “We also encourage a lot of unstructured day time too.” - Apurva Shrivasta “That bond between your children and yourself, you wouldn't even know how far along that can go.” - Apurva Shrivasta “A child who grows up with tuned parents, generally have really good self-confidence, high self-esteem.” - Dr. Carla Marie Manly “Just imagine, there is no fear in imagining things.” - Apurva Shrivasta “What a strong power to have the gift of imagination and to pass that on to your children.” - Dr. Carla Marie Manly Resources Mentioned Helping Families be Happy Podcast Apple Dr. Carla Marie Manly Website LinkedIn Twitter Instagram Podcast Editing
In today's episode of the “Helping Families Be Happy” podcast, host Dr. Carla Marie Manly, a practicing Clinical Psychologist, Wellness Advocate, and Author based in Sonoma County, California talks with Alexandra Jensen (Founder/Author and a military spouse and mom of three kids) about her very busy career, motherhood, and her two books one of which is ‘Perfect for This Skin You're In'. Episode Highlights 02:10 – Ale says that she grew up in the corporate world and worked in human capital consulting for a long time. She is very passionate about well-being. 03:45 – Ale loves military life for so many reasons, as per her it's an amazing community. 06:10 – Ale and her son spend a lot of the time together but as an author, she feels the book world has been interesting in terms of growing together, reading together, and talking together. 08:25 – Dr. Carla asks about Ale's secret to creating a happy, and healthy family as well as her recommendations as a mom of three little ones and husband in the Air Force. 10:45 – Dr. Carla refers to what Ale said about emotional intelligence, modeling healthy emotions, and letting your kids see that it's okay to cry, and it's okay to have conflicting emotions. 12:45 - You become proud of yourself for trying something new, and if it doesn't work, that's fine. 14:45 – Ale says that when they wake up they have cheesy eggs, avocado, and toast in the morning. 16:50 – Dr. Carla asks Ale to share one of her secrets to motherhood and life success. 19:00 – They talk about Ale's new book – ‘Perfect for This Skin You're In''. Dr. Carla says she likes the title of the book so much. 21:00 - We all have gifts within, so be yourself and let yourself shine but also be accepting and we're only better together. 24:40 – Ale says that she is glad that she keeps it alive because if she asked her husband questions then he finally says, please, no more questions. 26:30 - If we bring it down to that one baby step at a time, one piece at a time, it's easy to forget. Three Key Points Ale says that even if it's 30 minutes of getting outside in nature that helps them be happy and she thinks if she is happier it kind of sets the tone. So they try every day to get outside and make sure they're playing using creativity exercises. They definitely love sweets too but Ale's daughter eats a ton of sweets and then she doesn't feel good. So Ale thinks their main secret is their growth mindset and it is really tough. Also, they move so often, while they were moving in their last assignment in Colorado her daughters saw Ale crying and felt really sad. Ale thinks just being like a human and letting them know that you have all the emotions too. Ale is like you can be sad and cry and also be very excited for the next adventure and moving to a new country and exploring. We are in a world where we think that fear and anxiety are always bad when in fact sometimes having just the right amount of fear, and anxiety reflects that there's a close opportunity ahead. This is just a sign that we're growing and we're able to expand because we do get a little too comfortable in life where we're not expanding anymore. Dr. Carla thinks that curiosity is stout in many ways to judgments when we open up and we become curious and ask questions somehow and also her line of work. She doesn't want to be a judgmental psychotherapist or author. When we open up and start asking questions and stay in that place of objectivity and beautiful childlike curiosity, we find so much on the other side. We find that we can act in a really vulnerable way in true ways. Tweetable Quotes “I just love you talk about what makes you happy as a family.” – Alexandra Jensen “I have been either on the floor for meals or air mattresses, so that can be tough.” - Alexandra Jensen “My first book ‘Anything I Dream' was inspired by my first daughter.” - Alexandra Jensen “Absolutely what a role model you are, not only do you have the flexibility and being able to adapt to your ever-changing world, but also creativity is clear that you're radiating light for them to see creativity and action.” - Dr. Carla Marie Manly “I appreciate everything that you said and shared right there.” - Dr. Carla Marie Manly “I think COVID made a lot of people reflect on you know, what do I want to do?” - Alexandra Jensen “We all mess up, we're human, but like what can I learn from it and how can I do better next time?” - Alexandra Jensen “It sounds as if you take your role as mom very seriously in a fun way.” - Dr. Carla Marie Manly “Please tell about the genesis of the book and how it can be used to make women and moms and people, in general, feel good about who they are.” - Dr. Carla Marie Manly “It sounds like a really exquisite book and I really appreciate what you were just saying about listening.” - Dr. Carla Marie Manly “I think if you just focus on one thing.” - Alexandra Jensen Resources Mentioned Helping Families be Happy Podcast Apple Dr. Carla Marie Manly: Website LinkedIn Twitter Instagram Ali Jensen: Website Podcast Editing
In today's episode of the “Helping Families Be Happy” podcast, host Dr. Carla Marie Manly, a practicing Clinical Psychologist, Wellness Advocate, and Author based in Sonoma County, California talks with guests Ale and Coco. They talk about how they use Instagram and the world of social media to help empower children, families, women, and everybody. Episode Highlights 01:22 – Ale introduces herself and says having the internet for her has been this wonderful way of sharing things that she's thinking with everyone and starting conversations, critical thinking, and picture books because that's what she's really passionate about. 03:53 – Ale thinks that there's a lot to be said about how families are changing when they see picture books evolve over time. 05:03 – Coco introduces herself and says that she does a lot professionally. She talks about the theory-to-practice aspect of AR Education which is anti-bias, and anti-racist education. 07:30 - The whole idea of Librarian Fight Club is that she wants other people to start conversations as well, not just have it to herself, states Ale. 10:00 – Ale states that children's books are a reflection of society in general. 12:39 – Coco says that picture books provide a very specific structure for the reader and the caregiver who might be a little bit unfamiliar with the topic that they're trying to address. 14:23 – Dr. Carla says, if one helps their child develop critical thinking, all that they're asking or suggesting is that they teach the child how to ponder and assess what they hear, what they read, and what they see so that they can look at it from different perspectives. 16:00 – Coco explains how we can use that mirror picture book to facilitate critical thinking. 17:35 – We need to pick up the book, and have a goal in mind of what we want to do with this book, or have the goal in mind before we pick the book, and then come up with two or three questions that we can plant. 19:25 – Ale mentions that she and Coco were fundamentally a little bit opposite in their approaches to life. 21:00 – Dr. Carla says that those who like to be preparing things, go with Coco's approach, and for those who like to fly by the seat of their pants listen to what Ale is saying. 24:19 - Children should be allowed to be the expert of whatever they're talking about. 26:16 –Coco and Ale are doing great work in allowing adults to come and give their voices but also teaching children at the same time almost in a parallel way, mentions Dr. Carla. 28:33 - It's important that young people are given the space to not only state their opinions, but also to see examples of adults in their lives, says Coco. 30:20 – Ale says that if we're disagreeing with someone on the internet, we can engage with them, but we should try and engage with them as we would with a colleague or a peer. 32:57 – Dr. Carla says, we should give a child the chance from a very young age to learn. 34:05 – Coco says, her mission aligns very similar to Ale's where she wants families (biological or chosen) to be able to use books as resources to open up lines of communication and be able to find a space and a vocabulary for the things that may be going on inside of a tiny human. Three Key Points Ale mentions - it's important that we have spaces where people who have totally different ideas on things like books can talk and it's okay to not agree in the space. She does feel like one of her pet peeves with social media is that we all kind of exist in these Echo Chambers, like a bubble. We follow everybody who agrees with everything we say all of the time, and then every so often we get this weird reminder like a glimpse into this above all the people who are completely different, and every single opinion they have is different. There's never this time when we can come together and talk about something that is incredibly volatile. Coco explains - critical thinking or when we hear folks talk about critical thinking skills or development, they're talking about the ability as a human to stop and think about for a moment of fact. So, for instance, critical thinking can look a whole bunch of different ways. It could be us reading a newspaper headline that somebody shared on Instagram and being like, hold on a second. It's the ability to look at a piece of information and think about it from all angles, it is a good skill for any human to have. It's definitely a big goal to help kids develop those skills. Dr. Carla says - social media ways and technology have made us a little more separate from each other and Ale and Coco have initiated such a beautiful movement. They both are engaged in helping people to come together through books and reading as well as by having healthy dialogues. Dialogue doesn't mean we need to agree, it means we can be absolutely opposing horses and still be respectful. Tweetable Quotes “Picture books are just so important for families to start conversations to build literacy.” – Ale “My passion really lies in helping educators.” – Coco “Taking the theoretical concept, giving it real life flavor so we can put it to use in our lives.” – Dr. Carla “It's okay to have differences. In fact, we learn when we have differences.” – Dr. Carla Marie Manly “It's impossible to engage in critical thinking with children in families anywhere if you're not willing to accept the possibility that you could be wrong.” – Ale “We don't get as much engagement whereas the open-ended question invites at least one full sentence.” - Dr. Carla Marie Manly “You shouldn't be barraging a child with too many questions during a reading because it breaks up the narrative.” – Ale “I pick up books that I think look good, and I don't pre-read them. I read them for the first time with my kids.” – Ale “I don't see a lot of value in yes/no questions unless I'm checking for comprehension.” – Ale “One of the things that as parents we should be thinking of is how our behavior online is creating safer, unsafe spaces.” – Ale “We can have our opinions and still be respectful of somebody else's.” – Dr. Carla Marie Manly “I try to empower people to question what they're reading home with their kids.” – Ale “The more I know me and understand me, the more I'll contribute to a healthy happy family healthy happy world.” - Dr. Carla Marie Manly Resources Mentioned Helping Families be Happy Podcast Apple Dr. Carla Marie Manly Website LinkedIn Twitter Instagram Ale: Instagram Website Podcast Coco: Instagram Website Podcast Editing
In today's episode of the “Helping Families Be Happy” podcast, host Dr. Carla Marie Manly, a practicing Clinical Psychologist, Wellness Advocate, and Author based in Sonoma County, California talks with guest Jessica Speer, an author focused on helping kids and families thrive. She talks about her new book ‘Middle School Safety Goggles Advised'. This is a deep dive into the middle school experience in a way that's fun, but also honest and filled with the voices of students. Episode Highlight 01:07 – Dr. Carla says that she loves Jessica's subject matter because it's all about kids, all about helping children and their parents. 03:22 – Jessica mentions that she spent a lot of time in seventh-grade classrooms because she really wanted to understand what is it like to be a middle-schooler today. 05:00 - It's not about blaming, shaming, should or shouldn't, it's about waiting, slowing down, taking a look at what works for us, and what would create a healthy positive outcome, states Jessica. 07:02 – Dr. Carla states about Jessica's book that the book helps prevent some of the things from happening. We can't control everything but this book gives really solid tips and tools for self-awareness. 09:04 - It was a joy to work with kids and Jessica added as much as she could. She included a lot of their insights and wisdom in this book because kids have a ton and that makes it so real. 11: 35 – Dr. Carla enquires when we look at the book - ‘Middle School Safety Goggles Advised', how is this book going to help make families happier? 14:23 – Jessica says, being in the classroom was so fun, and she loves getting to know the kids over the course of the year. 16:12 - Dr. Carla enquires from Jessica about what would she say to the parents who say, “What stress our child possibly could have as they are provided with food, clothing, shelter, and all of these luxury items?” 18:01 – Jessica shares, what parents can do to mitigate some of that stress in each of those three areas. 20:15 - People think middle schoolers need seven or eight hours of sleep, but as per research it is around 10-12 hours instead. 22:04 – Dr. Carla says, she is a firm believer in phone technology out of the bedroom and it's important for parents to have the same rules. 24:00 – If we do notice overtime that they're struggling more than they should be maybe not wanting to go to school and starting to complain and using gigs and things like that, that might be a time where we do need to step in and get some extra help. 25:38 – Dr. Carla enquires from Jessica if a parent notices that something's wrong and suspects that a child's being bullied, what would she say to such parent, and how does a parent proceed? 27:08 – Jessica states that kids need to lead the charge as to how we're going to fix it and how we're going to create this change. 29:20 – Jessica mentions they've done a great job of bullying awareness in this book. 31:00 - In all these situations, as parents staying as calm and grounded as possible and trying to get as much information and understanding as we can be a great place to start, mentions Jessica. 33:22 – Dr. Carla says that for a parent, it really helps them understand a little bit more what today's struggles are like, for that middle schooler. 36:00 - Jessica says, it was fun to write those and they're really thought-provoking for kids and adults. Three Key Points Jessica says about the book that it's kind of a gentle but fun way to help kids, think through common but difficult situations. So yeah, it's got beautiful illustrations that she's super excited about, she thinks it's going to be a fun read for kids and a read that will help parents get their head back in the middle school game, what middle school was really like. This book will quickly bring them right back into their middle school years. Jessica explains how this book is going to make families happier from the parent's perspective, it's helpful to get their head in that space when their kids are about to enter or are in middle school, and then for kids, just the chance to kind of learn and grow and know that there are resources out there and there are resources within themselves and they've got choices. So, it's written in a way like they're reading what their friend might be telling them because there are tons of stories and quotes from peers. Dr. Carla says - another one of the pieces that she really loves about Jessica's book is that educators can read it and can take a lot of insights from the book. Parents can read it, better understand their children and have a better idea of how to help their middle school years. Not be perfect, nothing's perfect, but be healthy and fun. Tweetable Quotes “This book is super interactive, filled with humor and fun and stories.” - Jessica Speer “The best insights I heard kids which I incorporated in the book is ‘choose your own ending story.” - Jessica Speer “It just gives a sneak preview into middle school for kids entering or like right in the thick of it.” - Jessica Speer “If they read it, they will tap into the tricky part of middle school.” - Jessica Speer “Some of the best insights I got when I had little slips of paper and just asked a simple question.” - Jessica Speer “The trickiest things that they named were, the social media is tricky” - Jessica Speer “There are three different kinds of stress.” - Jessica Speer “Parents can do a lot taking the pressure off that academic stress.” - Jessica Speer “We need to get those stress levels back down to a healthy level.” - Jessica Speer “It's okay to let go of activities.” - Jessica Speer “The kids I was talking to they were pretty clear they were not getting enough sleep.” - Jessica Speer “As humans sometimes have to learn how to deal with mean people, how to stand up for ourselves, how to not take things personally, and how to just move on.” - Jessica Speer “It's important for parents to understand that difference too because we don't want to go off the handle if it's not a situation of bullying.” - Jessica Speer “We all are on these journeys to figure out, what are our strengths, what are our weaknesses, where are opportunities to grow.” - Jessica Speer Resources Mentioned Helping Families be Happy Podcast Apple Dr. Carla Marie Manly Website LinkedIn Twitter Instagram Jessica Speer: Website Podcast Editing
Life can be a journey of consciously crafting the best version of oneself. Wellness and joy do not occur by chance; they are fostered by manifesting one's true light with courage and strength. By creating a respectful, aware relationship with oneself and others, the body, mind, and spirit thrive. - Dr Carla Manly Dr. Carla Marie Manly is a clinical psychologist and wellness expert based in Sonoma County, California. In addition to her clinical practice, Dr. Manly is deeply invested in her roles as an author, consultant, advocate, and speaker. With a holistic, body-mind-spirit approach, she specializes in improving professional and personal relationships through mindfulness and healthy communication skills. Have you found your soulmate? In this episode we discuss Soul Mates, Twin Flames, and Soul Ties with Dr Carla Manly. The Pros and Cons of Having a Soul Tie Relationship in Your Life
In today's episode of the “Helping Families Be Happy” podcast, host Dr. Carla Marie Manly, a practicing Clinical Psychologist, Wellness Advocate, and Author based in Sonoma County, California talks with guest Donna Tetreault. They discuss her new book “The CASTLE Method”, a life-changing, and relationship-changing book. This book helps in understanding all these concepts of self-parenting. Episode Highlights 01:45 – Donna shares that she has been in this child area for a long time with a little bit of a stint in just general assignment reporting. 03:10 – Dr. Carla asks Donna, why compassion is important in a family? 05:00 – Dr. Carla enquires that how can we show compassion to the child? 07:50 - We need to have the acceptance of that child and who they are and not judge and not then turn that into something else that changes who this person is, says Donna. 09:37 – Dr. Carla highlights that when we remove that shaming vocabulary, the child is abler to prosper. 11:06 - We don't want to be doing the shaming because we don't learn when we shame, states Dr. Carla 13:35 – We need to log into emotional security. Donna doesn't think as parents we're necessarily trained or taught how to provide emotional security to our children. 15:24 – Donna talks about SEL (Social Emotional Learning). 16:28 - It's about this emotional security that's built in early on and that also leads us to better mental health and well-being, says Donna. 17:38 - Trust is something that we have to build into ourselves as parents, and then also allow ourselves to trust our children, mentions Donna 19:10 – Donna says, if something comes up, trust what you're thinking and believing and then go to the education part of it and educate yourself on it. 20:05 - What happens when parents break the child's trust, or when the child breaks the parent's trust? How do we handle that in ‘The CASTLE Method'? Dr. Carla enquires 22:24 - When we do something that takes the trust away from our child, we need to say we're sorry, highlights Donna. 25:00 – Donna says, she has to be curious and ask a lot of questions to find out the exact reason why something happening in the story or what's going on. 27:07 – We need to start teaching our kids self-love early on. 29:58 – Donna mentions they're trying to hyper-focus on the ability to allow the child to be proud on his own. 31:42 – Another part of expectations is to promote positivity inside the family and the parents. 33: 33 - We can cultivate and create more joy but it's also okay for us to have times where joy isn't present, states Dr. Carla. 35:00 – Dr. Carla enquires about how can we use ‘The CASTLE Method' to make families be happier? 39:52 - We are compassionate, and accepting, we are creating security, we create trust, and we have love and solid expectations. Expectations that are good, says Dr. Carla. 41:00 – Donna wants to teach young children that we need to be able to forgive our parents and understand and have compassion for them in where they were and how they were parenting. Three Key Points Donna shares that ‘The CASTLE Method' is an acronym that's used as a metaphor to build the castle or the family of your dreams. Not the perfect family. But the best version of your unique family. And so, CASTLE stands for Compassion, Acceptance, Security, Trust, Love, Expectations, plus Education and all of these are foundational principles to build that sound foundation for your family. Donna highlights - that acceptance is about accepting the individual, the child for who they are inside, who they are supposed to be in their lives and not trying to steer their lives, but allowing them to unfold as they should and following them on their path accepting their path. Donna explains, that what she's trying to do with her new Book ‘The CASTLE Method' is, we're together, how are we going to grow each other together to build out the best mom and dad, the best kids, the best family, to the best of our ability, our unique family because no family looks the same. So, it's just about trying to get the family to be the best version of itself. Tweetable Quotes “Empathy is being able to put yourself in somebody else's shoes, but compassion takes it a step further in that you are working to alleviate the suffering of another”. Donna Tetreault “When we have this compassionate mindset and we practice it, we're really bringing out the best in our family.” - Donna Tetreault “We need to accept a child for who they are in every way.” - Donna Tetreault “Acceptance is not only the antithesis of rejection, but it also means that we're not shaming and judging.” - Dr. Carla Marie Manly “Our brains don't learn when we're shamed.” - Dr. Carla Marie Manly “One strategy that I use throughout the book and inside of this security chapter is emotional security.” - Donna Tetreault “We really need to practice this emotional security.” - Donna Tetreault “If they don't have the empathy or compassion in their leadership, they won't be good leaders.” - Donna Tetreault “Don't ever do something for a child that he can do for himself.” - Donna Tetreault “I know my kid and I want to help my kid be the best version of himself. So, I'm going to trust him.” - Donna Tetreault “If you are a teacher, and you're not following what you're doing as a teacher, you're not going to have any buy-in with the child.” - Donna Tetreault “We teach our children self-esteem, and self-esteem is super important.” - Donna Tetreault “Self-responsibility also builds self-love.” - Donna Tetreault Resources Mentioned Helping Families be Happy Podcast Apple Dr. Carla Marie Manly Website LinkedIn Twitter Instagram Donna Tetreault: Website Instagram Facebook Podcast Editing
In today's episode of the “Helping Families Be Happy” podcast, host Dr. Carla Marie Manly, a practicing Clinical Psychologist, Wellness Advocate, and Author based in Sonoma County, California talks with guest Mifflin Lowe (Writer and Musician) about his book – ‘The Cuddle Book', the power of Cuddling. He says it's about cuddling and he'd like to call this year -the year of the cuddle. Episode Highlights 01:40 – ‘The Cuddle Book' is good for kids up to the age of five, says Mifflin. 04:00 – Mifflin tells about a poem that he has written to the publisher - Familius. 06:00 – Dr. Carla says that the power of a hug or a cuddle is worth a million words. 08:10 – Dr. Carla tells Mifflin, “You are the musician, you are the singer, and you are the author so there's nothing to compare with you.” 11:30 – It's the truth that for all of us no matter our age, when life feels tough and rough, the cuddles are truly magical. It feels so soothing and comforting to the body, mind, and spirit right before kids go to sleep. 13:50 – Mifflin talks about how this book brings families together making them happier. 16:10 - As a writer, there's nothing better than having kids react to your work and one of the greatest things that I've always enjoyed about being a writer and a musician for children is seeing them draw pictures. 19:05 – Dr. Carla thinks that the books like ‘The Cuddle Book' can help families be more joyful, more connected, happier, and more positive in the long run. 21:30 - Mifflin mentions that if you ever want to take a picture of you and your children cuddling then send it to his email and they will share it with the rest of the world. Three Key Points ‘The Cuddle Book' brings up these pieces in this world today where so many people are feeling alone and isolated, and COVID has kept us a little bit more in hibernation mode. It is important to remember that our need for contact or cuddles is such a primitive instinct that makes us feel better emotionally, mentally, and physically. The hug, feel and warmth relax kids, it makes them feel happy and composed. Bedtime books are a big deal, it soothes and relaxes kids and helps them go to sleep. They go to sleep in the arms of love. It just sets the stage for then waking up feeling absolutely rest rested at peace and excited for the next day. Mifflin's book can inspire parents to help their children interact with the book. Not only can they listen to or read it, but also they can interact with it. By then making their poems or their drawings. The power of a story like this is to inspire creativity and healthy interactions. Tweetable Quotes “That was like a grand slam for me because that's the most fulfilling thing an author can hope for.” - Mifflin Lowe “I want to read one little piece of your book, it's just it's so yummy.” - Dr. Carla Marie Manly “I'm trying to get the kid to like, get into what's good about cuddling and what they feel when they do.” - Mifflin Lowe “I would love it if you would share as much of it as you'd like to.” - Dr. Carla Marie Manly “I think it's a great thing to establish the habit of reading a book right away with the child as they understand the importance of togetherness, and embrace it.” - Mifflin Lowe Resources Mentioned Helping Families be Happy Podcast Apple Dr. Carla Marie Manly Website LinkedIn Twitter Instagram Mifflin Lowe Website Email Podcast Editing
In today's episode of the “Helping Families Be Happy” podcast, host Dr. Carla Marie Manly, a practicing Clinical Psychologist, Wellness Advocate, and Author based chats with guests Dame Sue Bagshaw and Michael Hempseed. They discuss their book ‘Calming Your Child: De-escalating tantrums, anxiety, aggression, and other challenging behaviors. Episode Highlights 01:12 – Dr. Carla asks Dame Sue how does one earn the title of Dame? 03:04 – Dr. Carla mentions that this book is a handful for a lot of parents and caregivers out there who are looking at their children and saying “Oh, my goodness, what do I do, or how do I call my child? 04:16 – Dr. Carla enquires, when Mom walks into the store, little Billy starts having an intense tantrum right there at the store, what's a mom to do rather than pick him up and run back out to the car? 06:17 – Michael says, we need to look a little deeper at what's causing this behavior. 08:07 – People can also have the opposite where they don't perceive so much information, we call it ‘Under Sensitivity'. A lot of these children tend to be quite clumsy. 10:00 – Dame says it's probably more to do with how the brain processes the information that's coming in from the ears or the eyes or the smell or the bits of skin. 12:39 – Dr. Carla highlights, that we look at things like school shootings, even if a child was not in that classroom, of course, they may ultimately have PTSD. 13:12 – Injury not only comes from verbal, emotional, physical, or sexual abuse but also an experience of being terrified or the experience of being frightened, states Dame. 15:07 – Michael says, sometimes we underestimate the impact that children may have watching traumatic things on the news. 18:39 – Dr. Carla enquires from Dame, what are one or two practical tips that a parent could get in their hands and heart around? 20:15 – Dame states that anything that helps brain growth for children is important. 23:10 – What would he say about a parent who suspects that maybe a sensory issue is at work or would want to know more? Asks Dr. Carla. 25: 00 - It's about slowing down to find out what's going on underneath, rather than assuming that my child is a monster or my child is trying to get attention or my child is a drama queen, says Dr. Carla. 27:08 – Dr. Carla points out that our children, their brains need lots of sleep, but they're not getting very much sleep. 29:30 – Dame says, ensure that we have a bit of everything and not too much of anything. 31:05 – Dr. Carla imagines that food is a big part of an underestimated part of behavioral issues. 33:03 – Michael mentions that in the book, they offer approximately 40 or 50 different strategies because every child is different. But it's so important to know that there are things that can be done. Three Key Points Michael shares the key in his book that is helping families be happy together - a lot of families are getting torn apart by children's serious behavioral issues. We often know that having a child with behavioral difficulties can put severe stress on a marriage. Many children with behavioral issues don't sleep very well at night. They can wake up with nightmares, or they can wake up screaming. We know that when people are tired or when people are sleep deprived, that's when Healthy Families don't have fun. Dame shares the tips - the first is eating together is important. If one gets that habit right from the start when they're little and then keeps it going through teenage times that's so helpful. The other tip is, if one has got more than one child, try and spend some time alone with each child. The number of bad behaviors that accrue from jealousy. Spending some individual time with each child is important. Michael highlights how parents can know more about sensory issues – they can go down a formal diagnosis route, but other times it's quite easy to pick up. If they see a child that's putting their hands over their ears around loud noises, that could be an indicator. Another really clear indicator is, that if children either hit against a wall or on a desk repeatedly, it's often a really good indicator that they've got sensory issues. So sometimes they don't necessarily need a formal diagnosis, and then once they are aware of that, they can start to make changes. It's recognizing what is going on and not just thinking this child's difficult for the sake of it. Tweetable Quotes “I think with children, we must try and fit from their point of view.” - Dame Sue Bagshaw “The way that we perceive the world is not the way that everyone else perceives the world.” - Michael Hempseed “People can also have the opposite where they don't perceive so much information, we call it as under sensitivity.” - Michael Hempseed Some children on the autism spectrum like their skin brushed with a hairbrush or special brushes because it feels very good and very soothing.” – Dr. Carla Marie Manly “Teachers are reporting more students with sensory issues in the past, and in some cases, it could be a response from a pandemic.” - Michael Hempseed “Any person in any situation can experience PTSD if they feel overwhelmed, terrified, out of control by a stimulating event or overstimulating event.” - Dr. Carla Marie Manly “Injuries are what is upsetting the brain processes.” - Dame Sue Bagshaw “It's really important not to let children watch the news.” - Dame Sue Bagshaw “It was found that the people that watched that repeatedly on TV reported higher levels of distress, and pain.” - Michael Hempseed “We sometimes forget that the brain soaks things in especially at night.” - Dr. Carla Marie Manly “Families that eat together are happy.” - Dame Sue Bagshaw “Just around the table together, even if it's only for 5 or 10 minutes every day.” - Dame Sue Bagshaw “It's been discovered that core sleep is a significant risk for suicide.” - Michael Hempseed “Stay away from those sugary sodas and have some water.” - Dr. Carla Marie Manly Resources Mentioned Helping Families be Happy Podcast Apple Dr. Carla Marie Manly Website LinkedIn Twitter Instagram Calming Your Child: Twitter Facebook Amazon Podcast Editing
In today's episode of the “Helping Families be Happy” podcast, host Dr. Carla Marie Manly, a practicing Clinical Psychologist, Wellness Advocate, and Author based in Sonoma County, California talks with Antonio Sacre, an American Author, Solo Performer, and Storyteller. Antonio speaks about his book ‘My Name is Cool'. This book is about what it is like to be in between two cultures and languages, and how do we celebrate and survive that. This book teaches children to be proud of their heritage and the things that make them different. This is inspired by Antonio's personal history growing up as a Cuban-Irish-American. Episode Highlights 01:00 – Antonio mentions, that his father comes from Cuba and his mom is an Irish American, so on his Cuban side of the family, they have all of these nicknames. He is called various names by different people. 04:12 – Antonio was in between two cultures and was never quite sure, how and where did he fit in there. 06:10 – One summer when Antonio was a kid, he went through every single novel and read them twice and from there began his deep love affair with books. 08:56 – We are those people who are in between cultures, languages, and parents, states Antonio. 10:20 – For years, Antonio has been making a living by telling stories to children in classrooms, libraries, and festivals. 12:02 – There are two women from the Familius group that are helping him with the book coming out next year and one of them is from Korea, and he wrote it specifically thinking of families who speak Spanish. 14:30 – This book tells us about what we do and how we do it when somebody is different from us. 16:10 - Antonio wants kids to go home and investigate, why they have that middle name? Why were they named after for whom with they named after? 18:34 - If you're embarrassed by your nickname and you don't want to share it, you don't have to, says Antonio. 23:02 – There's something fun in that other language, says Dr. Carla Marie Manly. 25:45 – Antonio has been working with teachers on a district level, how they can use the power of storytelling, and oral tradition to help their kids learn reading and writing. 28:00 – Parents should talk to their kids about who they know, there are 100 people in their family that their kids don't know about, mentions Antonio. 31:36 – Antonio is trying to remind parents of this simple thing that is just such a huge part of who we are as humans. 33:09 – Dr. Carla says she believes that so much healing takes place when we actively listen. 35:07 - These stories of our power or the power of our ancestors are fought can be formative, says Antonio. 37:50 – Talking with children about the hard things is helping them grow. 39:06 – We can't prepare our kids for every scenario, says Antonio 41:57 – Antonio suggests to all the parents who have adolescent kids that right now, they must be feeling like they have the worst kid in the world but they're not. 44:09 - If you're in trouble right now find a mentor, says the Antonio. 46:01 – Dr. Carla states that we all need mentors because if we don't have mentors, we struggle unnecessarily. Also, if we don't have mentors, we don't learn. Three Key Points Antonio is the reader that then led to the writer and he is also that person who lives in that blended world of two cultures. So, he has that to offer. Antonio is writing for one specific audience member that little girl whose parent comes from Mexico and the other comes from Germany. And she's having the same thing he had. And then obviously, he hopes that it reaches the universal. There are a lot of kids who are going to feel different ways and he wants them to be proud of how they feel. We do want to protect our children and the little ones in our lives, but we also want them to know that they have the power to move forward in life despite the obstacles that come our way. Tweetable Quotes “Years later, from all those years of reading and years of the journal, journal keeping, I now can say that I am a writer.” - Antonio Sacre “I want kids and families as they're reading that book out loud to be laughing for sure.' – Antonio Sacre “There were kids who would make fun of my dad in a way that was funny.” – Antonio Sacre “It's very hard for someone who doesn't speak the language to be able to speak the language in a way that sounds good to the language speaker.” – Antonio Sacre “Well, tell me about you or tell me how I pronounce your name or how do you prefer to be addressed, right?” - Dr. Carla Marie Manly “I was named after my dad who was named after his dad who was named after his dad, so you can see it's the Cubans.” - Antonio Sacre “I'm named after a man I never met. I'll never meet who was my dad's best friend whom he never saw again.' – Antonio Sacre “Well, it's cool, and we are all cool. Despite our differences because of our differences. If we take the time to slow down, we are all pretty darn cool people.” - Dr. Carla Marie Manly “You bring classrooms and assemblies the gift of laughter and heart and connection and understanding through the power of a name.” - Dr. Carla Marie Manly “If stories don't always have happy endings, we can use them as learning opportunities.” - Dr. Carla Marie Manly “One of the biggest gifts we can give as parents are to show you know here are the boundaries.' - Dr. Carla Marie Manly “If we don't have mentors in our lives, then we stop evolving and transforming.” - Dr. Carla Marie Manly “A podcast can be a mentor, a best friend who has wisdom in an area could be a mentor somebody a co-worker or a partner.” - Dr. Carla Marie Manly Resources Mentioned Helping Families be Happy Podcast Apple Carla Marie Manly Website LinkedIn Twitter Instagram Antonio Sacre: Website Instagram Twitter Podcast Editing
In today's episode of the “Helping Families Be Happy” podcast, host Christopher Robbins talks to Shaun Tomson, a former World Surfing Champion, who has been described as one of the greatest and most influential surfers of all time. Shaun is also a world-renowned leader, mentor, entrepreneur, environmentalist, and best-selling author. Today they're going to explore principles of decimal living from his most recent book, The Surfer and The Sage. Episode Highlights 02:20 – Christopher asks Shaun to tell a little bit about his background, how he got into surfing and the World Championships. 04:15 – Shaun talks about his father who was South Africa's top swimmer and used to go to the Olympics. He became a world champion in many events around the world. 07:42 - There's a way to activate positive decision-making in this magic universe through the stroke of Science and Leadership, says Shaun. 10:02 - This book – ‘The Surfer and The Sage' is a continuation of philosophy that addresses the eighteen relentless, breaking waves of life, from loss and aging to relationships and depression, and guides you to transformation. 12:30 – Christopher wonders and enquires that as a Surfer and as an Environmentalist what has the ocean taught Shaun. 15:50 - Shaun mentions that his parents have had so much impact on him that it has been a source of service, a source of inspiration, and it's been the way he became the world champion. 17:00 - What have you learned in writing the book that can help the family deal with the anxiety that perhaps some are experiencing today? Asks Christopher. 19:20 - This book is a common book that will take you through some of the stories and philosophical interpretations of the story. 21:20 – Christopher was so fascinated as he was reading about forgiveness, humility, and courage in the book. Every chapter amongst the 18 chapters is focused on life are opposites. 25:30 - Was there a moment in writing this book where you learned something you had an aha moment something you hadn't realized before? Enquires Christopher. 27:50 – Christopher states that he loves that quote by Gupta from the book – “Whatever you can believe you can begin. Boldness has genius, power, and magic so that it connects with anyone." Three Key Points While everyone runs something different, we have defined this compulsion that we want to be better today than yesterday, and we want to be better tomorrow than we are today. The underline is, that we'll help others to be better which means to help others to be part of a wider community. ‘The Surfer and The Sage' is not a list of rules to follow that guarantee success, health, or wealth, but rather a collection of advice from two guides who have traveled far and wide and suffered deeply, but still look forward to tomorrow with faith and hope. This is not just a book that talks about this concept of hope and this concept of optimism. This is a book that talks about faith, and darkness. It talks about forgiveness, but at the same time, it also talks about guilt. It talks about optimism, but it talks about pessimism as well. So we have to see these aspects in order to make a positive step forward. Tweetable Quotes “My primary mission is to help the world be a better place by making lives better.” - Shaun Tomson “After I retired from the church, I ended up working for Sony which worked for Patagonia for a couple of years, that was a wonderful brand.” - Shaun Tomson “The ocean has taught me so much about the basic principles of life.” - Shaun Tomson “At the beginning of the book, you say this world is too often, too broken for too many.” - Christopher Robbins “So the principal words have been stress, anxiety, depression, and disconnection.” - Shaun Tomson “You have to face the bitter too in order to know the sweet” - Christopher Robbins “That's the whole point that Familias assisted families, be happy individuals, families, whatever type of family you have.” - Christopher Robbins “I started with a statement that words have the power to change our mindset, and our lives.” - Shaun Tomson Resources Mentioned Helping Families be Happy Podcast Apple Dr. Carla Marie Manly Website LinkedIn Twitter Instagram Shaun Tomson Website Instagram Twitter LinkedIn Podcast Editing
In today's episode of the “Helping Families Be Happy” podcast, host Dr. Carla Marie Manly, a practicing Clinical Psychologist, Wellness Advocate, and Author based in Sonoma County, California talks with guest Pam Lobley who is talking with us about her book – ‘Why Can't We Just Play'. Episode Highlights 01:15 – Pam is a writer, she started her career in sketch comedy, so everything she does or writes, she approaches it from a comedic standpoint. 03:35 – When Pam's son was in fifth grade he said that he never had time to just play. Play for him was like having a friend over, goofing around in the backyard, making their own games, and going to a playground without any parents' rules. 05:45 - Pam feels so lucky that she took the chance and slowed down, for me as a parent, it was the risk because I was doing something I wasn't sure was right. 07:20 - It's hard to be a parent and that was hard. Kids fought a lot like siblings and especially when they only had each other to play with, or it rained a lot. 09:15 – Dr. Carla asks if it is possible that this would only work for a stay-at-home mom? 11:05 - We're always comparing ourselves to other parents and we're always comparing our kids to other kids, which is so ridiculous, but it's very hard not to do. 13:00 – Dr. Carla enquires from Pam that for somebody who wants to be able to let their child play, other than the low expectations what are some key steps they can follow? 14:50 - There are times to step in when somebody's bullying, being super toxic, or anything like that. But other than that, that's where we learn to negotiate. 17:20 – Pam says that the young kids instead of being on phone all the time, enjoy being loud and messy in the backyard or climbing all over the playground, or just pretending whatever they want with their friends. 19:10 - We often forget as parents, that kids as much as they might push back against structure and routine. As far as family rules go we need them for the kid's sanity and for the parent's mental health. 20:50 - Some people say minors need to play or my kids should be in academics. They're on the fast track to an Ivy League school who cares about play? 22:30 – We can learn great life lessons from watching our children play, and then sleep as they have no sleep issues. 24:00 – Pam suggests to the parents that they need to consider their children as they are. Parents shouldn't be comparing their kids with others. 26:15 - Research shows us that happiness peaks when you get to that point of success when you have enough to pay your bills, or enough to have health insurance. After that, it can start dipping because external success is not as important as the beauty of internal success and the joys of big things like play. 28:20 - Pam thinks giving your child as much time to play will position them to be healthier and maybe better learners when they hit high school age. 30:30 – Young people today don't want to try in case they fail because they feel too much pressure to succeed all the time. Three Key Points Pam says you can build in this type of autonomous, independent, and free play for your kids. For instance, let's say you do need to have a daycare or a camp for your child. Look for the one with the least amount of structure, the most amount of fun, and low expectations. The whole idea is that we're supposed to be improving our children all the time is so exhausting. So it's okay to just be Spider-Man all summer long. That's a perfectly acceptable thing for an eight-year-old. One of the steps parents can follow is to kids have an afternoon or several hours every week that is their own. The other step would be that when your child is playing with other children, resist the urge to step in and make it right because then the kids don't learn how to do it themselves, just pretend not to notice. A few experts see that play for children is the best education they can have. They've done so many tests about how free play, autonomous, and self-directed play increase their creativity, resilience, and ability to think things through self-awareness. It's different when kids are teenagers because that's different but for kids under 13, play is the best. Tweetable Quotes “I got the idea for this book because I felt like there wasn't a way in our kids' lives.” - Pam Lobley “That happened in the spring and I decided that we would have no summer activity.” - Pam Lobley “Over the summer before I realized I did the right thing.” “They did drive me crazy, I'm not going to lie.” - Pam Lobley “The book I tried to be is funny, so there are a lot of funny stories in the book.” - Pam Lobley “I have to say it is the first time in my life I have ever heard parents say set low expectations.” - Dr. Carla Marie Manly “Social media makes it so much easier to get immersed in that world of what I call toxic comparison, yet that is the antithesis of healthy parenting.” - Dr. Carla Marie Manly “What about the kid who says I want to be on my phone all day?” - Dr. Carla Marie Manly “If you want a hockey-achieving kid, it's probably the best thing that you could do for them at that age.” - Pam Lobley “I think it's really important to see to see your child for who they really are.” - Pam Lobley “The big learning lesson is to let the children play, let them learn and grow. Figure out their path as they're growing.” - Dr. Carla Marie Manly “Failure is a fairly recent interpretation of the word and that it used to mean to simply arrive at a different destination.” - Dr. Carla Marie Manly “The book ‘Why Can't We Just Play' is available wherever books are sold, it's in Audio Book and on the eBook format.” - Pam Lobley Resources Mentioned Helping Families be Happy Podcast Apple Dr. Carla Marie Manly Website LinkedIn Twitter Instagram Pam Lobley: Website LinkedIn Instagram Facebook Podcast Editing
In today's episode of the “Helping Families Be Happy” podcast, host Christopher Robins, co-founder of Familius publishing, husband, father of nine, author, fisherman, backpacker, and aspirational musician based in the Central Valley of California talks with guest Dr. Carla Marie Manly, a practicing Clinical Psychologist, Wellness Advocate, and Author based in Sonoma County. They discuss a challenging subject for all parents, i.e. how to deal with the anger, fear, sadness, and other associated issues involving Texas School Shooting, and other tragedies that families are witnessing and experiencing. Episode Highlights 01:44 – Christopher enquires from Dr. Carla that there are parents who are dealing with anger, fear, and sadness in the wake of the many recent shootings. 03:37 - Dr. Carla says, parents, work on their feelings so they're not overwhelming their children with unprocessed emotions. 06:05 – Dr. Carla states, don't pressure the child, create the opportunity to talk. 08:07 - If you have a child who wants a lot of space, pay attention that the child is safe in their safe space, mentions Dr. Carla 10:15 - The five stages of grief are denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and ultimately acceptance. 12:45 - It's okay as a parent, and caregiver that let me check in with a therapist on that or let me go Google it, says Dr. Carla 14:02 – Christopher asks Dr. Carla, how can she help us as parents, as to, what we need to do? 16:50 - We need to use our resources, internal and external, to work on being able to care for ourselves so that we can be the rock for our little ones or big ones. 19:51 – Dr. Carla points out that we should allow ourselves and our children to express themselves in creative ways. 20:56 – Dr. Carla tells that when we see the dramatic type of news footage, then as adults we think about what's happening with the children. 22:52 – Christopher enquires, what do we say when our children say why did this happen or why did that man do that? 26:40 – Dr. Carla explains how can we make our children safe. 30:32 – Christopher enquires if there are some resource books that Dr. Carla would recommend which might help parents deal with such situations. 32:22 – Dr. Carla says, there are definitely good books that talk about self-care on the Familius website. Three Key Points There are other resources for children, you don't have to be the only resource. You can pick up a book on trauma, a children's book, and read it to the child so that you don't have to know it all. Then maybe as you read, you're able to process some of what's going on for you. Christopher mentions how we can make our children safe. We can really watch our communities, we can be a part of the schools and keep an eye on what's happening in the schools, volunteer in the schools, do mental health awareness campaigns in our school, get it on our radar, and depending on our child's level, on their radar. So, they feel safe and come to us. It's important for parents to know that whatever they're feeling, the stress and strain and being pulled in two or three directions, what should they do, that's normal. Talk to someone about it, process it and then make the very best decision you can for your situation and move forward. Tweetable Quotes “Process your experience, so that anything you're not processing does not leak out onto your child.” – Dr. Carla Marie Manly “Be available to talk, don't force a talk, but welcome and chat with your child.” - Dr. Carla Marie Manly “Telling a child don't feel your feelings makes them feel criticized, makes them want to close down rather than allowing them to feel their feelings.” - Dr. Carla Marie Manly “Sitting down and making eye contact is one of the best gifts you can give your child.” - Dr. Carla Marie Manly “The first step in being a parent and caregiver, you matter.” - Dr. Carla Marie Manly “Your kids and you, need as much routine as consistency as possible.” - Dr. Carla Marie Manly “Q&A session is one of the ways we build awareness and connection.” - Dr. Carla Marie Manly “You can learn to be confident enough to say I don't know and that's okay.” – Christopher Robbins Resources Mentioned Helping Families be Happy Podcast Apple Dr. Carla Marie Manly Website LinkedIn Twitter Instagram Podcast Editing
In today's episode of the “Helping Families Be Happy” podcast, host Dr. Carla Marie Manly, a practicing Clinical Psychologist, Wellness Advocate, and Author based in Sonoma County, California talks with guest Jessica Lancaster who shares about her work as an Actor, Social Media Guru, Producer, and Waitress. Episode Highlights 01:38 – Jessica says, she waited tables now for 20 years and she doesn't actually need to do it financially anymore. 03:51 – It's important for people with phones to keep them away while they eat. 05:30 – Jessica wishes she could have had more family meals; so many wonderful things can happen around the dinner table. 07:10 – Dr. Carla asks Jessica about her life as an Instagram Goddess. 09:05 - Instagram is a great way to unite mothers. Those are the groups and communities of support and connection that can be found only through Instagram. 11:35 – If the post doesn't make sense of what they're doing or what they're trying to say, Jessica guides them to a better target market of quote selling. 13:30 – Jessica mentions that everybody is doing cool stuff like the artsy design but now what's working is just authentic feeling in the moment. 15:38 - It's important to shop local and support these women and these moms specifically as the money's going right into their children. 17:40 - The movie making and producing came out of necessity to play good roles, mentions Jessica. 19:43 – Jessica says, she grew up in an interesting family where her mom was married four times, and her dad was married three times. 21:00 – Jessica talks about what the Screen Actors Guild (SAG) means. 24:40 – Good acting is that they want something different than you want, and that's what makes the scene explode, says Jessica. 25:15 – Dr. Carla states, that as a parent, and partner you are seeing the other and you're responding to them whereas, in acting, you are reacting to create contrast. 27:50 - The scene has the contrast, but in life, one should get what they want. 29:38 – Jessica says, when there is a contrast, it's an easy solution. 31:25 - One piece of advice that sticks with Jessica is don't give up on having to be right. 33:18 – Jessica shares, that something shifted in her and she learned that it didn't feel good to be in an argument, and she's not going to do that anymore. 34:50 – If you're looking for a good movie, Jessica has got movies like ‘The Holy Fail', and ‘Choosing Signs' on Amazon. 36:10 – Dr. Carla says, we need more films about love, comedy, and lightheartedness. Three Key Points Dr. Carla Highlights - one of the things she loves about Familius Publishing is that they have a grassroots way of working where they honor moms, and families and are heavily focused on that. She's a believer that the more we support our kids, the more we support our family, the family's authenticity, genuineness, caring for the planet, and the happier we all are going to be in the long run. Children don't know enough to make life easy so the parents have to come in. Unfortunately for many people, they don't know how they weren't given lessons, they didn't have role models on how to be in a relationship. So, the work that is involved for people is getting to a place within themselves and their relationships. Dr. Carla mentions - it is about showing the world what it looks like to radiate love. Not radiate I am right, or I am better. You are bad, but to radiate love, because that's what Jessica does it's one of the things she specializes in naturally as she radiates love. Tweetable Quotes “I tell people at my tables I'm like, if possible, please don't have your cell phones out.” - Jessica Lancaster “If you're talking and communicating, you're not just eating the food. You're enjoying the food.” - Jessica Lancaster “You'll go to someone's page and they have like 100,000 followers and 17 likes, that feels inauthentic to me.” - Jessica Lancaster “The more authentic you are, the more successful your page will be.” - Jessica Lancaster “There is less than 1% of SAG actors are making a living acting.” - Jessica Lancaster “The SAG makes sure that I get the residuals from that TV show I did or same with CSI or whatever.” - Jessica Lancaster “It sounds as if being a producer might not be or as an actor might not be as glamorous as people think there's a lot going on behind the scenes.” – Dr. Carla Carie Manly “TV and film would be very boring if everybody got a long period.” - Jessica Lancaster “People want to be seen and validated. So, the lesson of the day is to avoid the contrast in your relationships.” - Dr. Carla Carie Manly “I teach reflective listening, mirroring all of those things and being able to not engage in dichotomous thinking, where I'm right, you're wrong. - Dr. Carla Carie Manly “Just be good to one another.” - Jessica Lancaster “I think to me, that's the best kind of film is where the actors radiate love.” - Dr. Carla Carie Manly Resources Mentioned Helping Families be Happy Podcast Apple Dr. Carla Marie Manly Website LinkedIn Twitter Instagram Jessica Lancaster: Instagram Podcast Editing
In today's episode of the “Helping Families be Happy” podcast, host Dr. Carla Marie Manly, a practicing Clinical Psychologist, Wellness Advocate, and Author based in Sonoma County, California talks with Mary Potter Kenyon (A Certified Grief Educator, Public Speaker, and an Author) who talks about her book ‘Called to be Creative - A Guide to Reigniting Your Creativity'. Mary shares how creativity helps you and your families to be happy. Episode Highlights 02:50 – Dr. Carla asks Mary about her former work, and what she has been doing before she moved to this segment of writing a book – ‘Called to be Creative'. 05:00 – Mary talks about her book ‘Mary and Me' which was about a friendship fuelled by 30 years of handwritten letters. 06:40 – Mary says even though she grew up in poverty, her mom was the person that she saw was making their poverty-stricken house a home. 09:00 – Mary also interviewed various people that she saw as creative, like a yoga teacher, a painter, etc. 12:00 - One of the studies that fascinated Mary was how adulthood takes a creative genius right out of us. 13:05 - What would you say is the reason there's that incredible drop-off in creativity? Asks Dr. Carla. 15:11 – Dr. Carla asks about a few pointers on how readers can bring creativity into their lives, the lives of their children, and the lives of their partners. 16:57 – Mary recommends to start making a list of those things that you love doing, and then making a list of things that you would do if time or money was no hindrance to you. 20:00 - One of the things Mary did to reflect the value of learning together was to start a creativity group at her local library, get together, and just try something different every month. She says her book is built to do that. 22:00 - Science shows that if you are being creative and using your natural creativity, you are going to the doctor less, there's less anxiety and there is less stress. 25:35 - When we find that passion, and you can hear it in other people's voices pointed out that they would love to see you doing this more because you just come alive when you're doing that. 27:-35 - Give yourself once a month date to check off the list of those things because if your grand pull yourself into too many directions and think well I started trade is a fair trade, you can feel overwhelmed. Three Key Points Mary thinks we all have it in us to be creative. What happens to that very creative little child, that we become an adult who can't fit creativity into their lives? So there's a little bit of science in the book - ‘Called to be Creative' as Mary delved into the research and discovered that science is behind it, that we are designed to be creative. Creativity can be what you are born with the gift, you might not think of as creativity it could be that you have a natural knack for relating to children or you have this empathy that you are a good listener that can be you can use that creatively in your job and life. A lot of people rediscovered their natural creativity during the beginning of the pandemic, doing something that they hadn't done for years like playing games with their children or getting outside and coloring with chalk on the sidewalks. The main point of Mary's book is to play. Put some play into your life as an adult. Allow yourself the time for creativity. Don't look at it as something that you have to save for leisure time, or you're going to be waiting a long time because there's not a lot of leisure time built into our busy lives. We have to have that in our lives as adults. Tweetable Quotes “It would be a very sad state of affairs if grief was the only source of your creativity.” - Dr. Carla Marie Manly “So, that very first inkling that I might be writing about creativity was planted in 2011.” - Mary Potter Kenyon “I caught on to creativity in the form of writing all those years.” - Mary Potter Kenyon “There's a little bit of science in –‘Called to be Creative.” - Mary Potter Kenyon “So, with that background, tell me a little bit about some of the science.” – Dr. Carla Marie Manly “The world is telling us that creativity doesn't make you money.” - Mary Potter Kenyon “First of all, we have to stop thinking of creativity as something that is chosen for you.” - Mary Potter Kenyon “Another thing that we have to do is look for childhood.” - Mary Potter Kenyon “Sometimes we need that energy of a tribe that kind of gets the creativity going energized.” – Dr. Carla Marie Manly “Passion can ignite so many beautiful parts of the self.” - Dr. Carla Marie Manly “I would say make a list and take you out on a date once a month. Give yourself 12 months to try these different things.” - Mary Potter Kenyon Resources Mentioned Helping Families be Happy Podcast Apple Dr. Carla Marie Manly Website LinkedIn Twitter Instagram Mary Potter Kenyon Website Facebook Instagram Twitter LinkedIn Podcast Editing
In today's episode of the “Helping Families be Happy” podcast, host Dr. Carla Marie Manly, a practicing Clinical Psychologist, Wellness Advocate, and Author based in Sonoma County, California talks with Tamara Girardi, a full-time English Professor for Community College, and an author who writes picture books and young adult fiction. On today's podcast, Tamara is talking about her book ‘Why, Daddy? Why?' Episode Highlights 01:50 – Dr. Carla asks what led Tamara to write the book ‘Why, Daddy? Why?' 04:15 – Tamara thinks that socialization comes from peers, from parents, and maybe from teachers, and overtime questions are not as celebrated as they once were. 06:20 - It's interesting to see how Gabriela (Tamara's third child) has transitioned to taking the information that she's hearing and summarizing it into a cohesive answer, says Tamara. 08:32 – Tamara mentions that this story is a one-on-one story between the cub and the daddy. 10:13 - When Tamara had another child since then she thinks love grows and multiplies. There's no limit to love, but there is a limit to being patient. 12:00 - When you're reading with your child, it's not that you're reading but other unhealthy habits can be addressed as well through that one experience. 14:00 – Tamara hopes that people that get the book will read it many times as their children grow and with multiple children at different ages. 16:15 - Each one of Tamara's children had different board books that were sort of the signature book when they were at that age, and reading them now is very nostalgic. 18:00 - Writing picture books were special, Tamara started writing picture books at a difficult time not only in her writing career but in her life as well. 20:00 - As a parent, we think a lot about our children, and we talk about them especially when they have difficulty with other friends, or if they're feeling that someone wasn't kind to them. Three Key Points Tamara says that ‘Why, Daddy? Why?' story was inspired by her third child Gabriela when she was about three years old. As a Professor Tamara noticed that her college students were often hesitant to ask questions, however, it was fascinating to see how her three-year-old asked her 100 questions a day and was very unapologetic about it. This started to make her wonder about that progression. Also, she realized that questions are one of the most wonderful ways of learning about life. The story in the book is about the closeness and connection that can come from questioning and having somebody respond to you in a healthy and loving way. The most beautiful part about this book is that it is setting the stage for children to learn that this is how you can ask a question, and get a response in a healthy way. The story is also teaching parents that this is the kind of dynamic that is helpful and healthy for children because it is such a busy world and we sometimes forget the importance of slowing down to be patient with children in our lives. Kids start to learn a little bit multi-dimensionally and let's say one of the questions in the book is – “Why do you wear a watch?” Then the dad answers – “So I know when it's time to give you a bubble bath.” But obviously, there are many reasons that dad wears a watch, it's not that one reason. So it's special for kids to start thinking multi-dimensionally in that way that it's not everything, it's just like the singular connections. But there are these different elements just like the 10 habits. Tweetable Quotes “My house is a little bit beautiful and chaotic at the same time which a lot of families out there can relate to.”– Tamara Girardi “I think just asking the question was something I started thinking about.” - Tamara Girardi “So, there is an art to asking a question.” - Dr. Carla Marie Manly “The book is a board book, and the main characters are a Daddy Bear and his little cub.” - Tamara Girardi “That's what I work on every day, its being as present and as patient as possible.” - Tamara Girardi “You're helping the child feel loved and seen and doing it also in a playful way.” - Tamara Girardi “Books present the opportunity for conversation and interaction that allows us to see from other people's perspectives.” - Dr. Carla Marie Manly “There are questions in the book that came from three-year-old Gabriela” - Tamara Girardi “Sometimes we can't do a whole lot, but when we are powered by love and the loving, supportive people around us, we can do magnificent things.” - Dr. Carla Marie Manly Resources Mentioned Helping Families be Happy Podcast Apple Dr. Carla Marie Manly Website LinkedIn Twitter Instagram Tamara Girardi Website Instagram Twitter Facebook Podcast Editing
In today's episode of the “Helping Families be Happy” podcast, host Dr. Carla Marie Manly, a practicing Clinical Psychologist, Wellness Advocate, and Author based in Sonoma County, California talks with Emily Lauren Dick who talks about her book Body Positive: A Guide to Loving Your Body. In her book, she is motivating women to love themselves no matter what body they exist. This book tells us about how diverse beauty looks. Episode Highlights 00:55 – It is the most beautiful book, a substantial book, and wonderful for the ears, the eyes, the mind, and the heart, says Dr. Carla. 02:06 – Emily thinks she doesn't know anyone who has not suffered from body image issues. So, that was her inspiration for writing the book. 04:55 – Dr. Carla enquires, how do these body images make women and men feel insecure? 06:41 - People that are put on this pedestal and in the media, even they don't look like themselves today, there's even mechanics in the video that create people, states Emily. 08:05 – Dr. Carla talks about a recent study which says when females were shown photos of larger women, their preference for thin bodies decreased. However, when they were shown images of thin women, they preferred thinness. 10:04 - We talk about mental health, illnesses, and disease, but we don't talk about how big an issue this is in society. 11:30 – Dr. Carla shares that a very wise person told her recently, that advertising in today's realm is based on getting to people's insecurities. They want us to be insecure because if we feel insecure, we will buy this and that. 13:15 – Emily highlights, we are so confused as people and as a society because we've been taught that when our bodies feel bad or our insides feel bad that we're the problem not to look at how the inner body works. 14:21 - When you permit yourself you will naturally be drawn to eating a balance of foods because you're listening to your body. 17:30 – Emily gets a lot of feedback about this book as so many parents and moms have bought this for themselves as well as for their children so they can show them what diverse beauty looks like. 19:19 – Dr. Carla says, the photographs are exquisite in which Emily has shown women in their beautiful, exquisite imperfection, which is how we are as humans. 21:23 – The women revealing the imperfection that we are taught to hide and that's just so touching, says Dr. Carla 24:06 – Emily states, that she can't wait to see what the world will look like when the focus is not on women's appearance. Three Key Points When Emily went to university and learned about the male gaze and sociology and all these different feminist perspectives sort of the world we live in. She was inspired to make this information accessible to people, especially young girls and women who didn't have the same experience that she did. She had that aha moment in the university and realized why we have body image issues. There are so many things that we can do to challenge the way the world views women's bodies today. The more we see people that look like us, the better we will feel about ourselves and our bodies and that's why so many companies that have adopted this body-positive sort of marketing platform for their advertising and have been so successful because we are dying to see people who look like us in clothing in the media in online so we want it because it makes us feel good. This is a healing book for so many. It's a book that brings us together and makes us feel like we're not alone. One of the things that this diet culture does is makes us feel like we're the only ones in the world that feel negatively about our bodies and that we're the only ones who have stretch marks or fat or acne and all these things and when we come together and realize we're all going through this together, that is so healing. Tweetable Quotes “The male gaze is objectification; it is seeing a woman and viewing her as an object and we as women view ourselves through that same lens.” - Emily Lauren Dick “It is extremely harmful to the way we see ourselves. Women are taught that their priority is to be beautiful.” - Emily Lauren Dick “When we feel our bodies are wrong, we feel like we're wrong as people.” - Emily Lauren Dick “You create an ideal person and they don't exist.” - Emily Lauren Dick “The people who are killing us because they're feeding or creating or recirculating this idea that fineness is the ultimate goal of life.” - Emily Lauren Dick “Sometimes it's just a matter of listening to our physical bodies.” - Emily Lauren Dick “Forget the mirror that's in the bathroom, but also the mirror of society and say I want to feel good in my body.” - Emily Lauren Dick “Sometimes you need to rest your body on the couch and sometimes you need to go out for a walk because that's what feels good.” - Emily Lauren Dick Resources Mentioned Helping Families be Happy Podcast Apple Dr. Carla Marie Manly Website LinkedIn Twitter Instagram Emily Lauren Dick: Website Instagram Podcast Editing
In today's episode of the “Helping Families Be Happy” podcast, host Dr. Carla Marie Manly, a practicing Clinical Psychologist, Wellness Advocate, and Author based in Sonoma County, California talks with guests Sabrina Moyle and Eunice Moyle (Founder Sisters of the company - ‘Hello! Lucky') about their book ‘I Believe in You'. They also talk about their company ‘Hello! Lucky'. Episode Highlights 01:20 – Sabrina and Eunice are sisters and they grew up in Asia. Their mom was born in China and raised in Taiwan and their dad worked for the US government as a Diplomat. 03:00 – Sabrina refers to the book she read by Educator Barbara Coloroso - ‘The Kids Are Worth It', where she deeply felt resonated with the messages in the book. 05:15 – ‘I Believe in You' is about having Faith and Trust that no matter what, your child is going to be okay. 07:20 – These life lessons are a lifelong process and this is something that continues until adulthood. 08:30 – Dr. Carla states that the fifth and sixth principles reminded her of attachment and how important it is to have a child have anyone in his life know they are a priority. 10:16 – Eunice mentions that one of her parenting mantras is to always tell kids the truth even if they are asking the weirdest question. 12:20 - Parenting is indeed one of the hardest jobs ever made so Sabrina and Eunice are helping support joy in a parent's life to be joyful parents without taking away the truth, says Dr. Carla. 14:25 - There's such tremendous joy that can come with this process if we allow ourselves to learn from our children as well, says Sabrina. Three Key Points The book – ‘I Believe in You' is about building the resilience and the self-sufficiency of children. It gives out six important messages in the context of raising your child – No matter what, I have faith in you, I trust you, I know you can handle this, you are listened to, you are cared for and you are very important to me. It is so important that if kids ask questions then respond to them with an age-appropriate answer with honesty and truth, this is all we can do as parents. Be direct, be kind, and be honest in the answers you give to kids. No doubt parenting is one of the hardest jobs and is incredibly challenging, but it is also an important opportunity for transformation. Use parenting to transform yourself into a better human being so that you can model that for your child. What's beautiful about being a parent is you're having to teach all of the basics of being a good human being from first principles to someone who hasn't learned them before. Tweetable Quotes “Eunice and I started our company ‘Hello! Lucky', which is a greeting card company, originally and now it is a Design Studio.” - Sabrina Moyle “The book ‘I Believe in You' was inspired by the educator Barbara Coloroso.” - Sabrina Moyle “Let's talk about the six concepts/principles, that are so critical in the context of raising Children.” - Dr. Carla Marie Manly “Children need to know that they are a priority.” - Sabrina Moyle “I'm very sort of organic parenting style, Serena does a lot of reading and likes thinking and I kind of, go with the flow.” - Eunice Moyle “Parenting can be hard like it's not a joke. It's like one of the hardest jobs I've ever had.” - Eunice Moyle Resources Mentioned Helping Families be Happy Podcast Apple Dr. Carla Marie Manly Website LinkedIn Twitter Instagram Sabrina Moyle and Eunice Moyle Website Website Podcast Editing
In today's episode of the “Helping Families be Happy” podcast, host Dr. Carla Marie Manly, a practicing Clinical Psychologist, Wellness Advocate, and Author based in Sonoma County, California talks with Libby Kiszner who will be talking about her book ‘Dear Libby'. In her book she makes us discover the author within. Libby guides you to tap into your creativity, hone your strengths and create a book that resonates with readers. Whether you're a first-time author or a seasoned publisher, acquire the tools you need to. Episode Highlights 01:20 – Libby shares that she lives in Jerusalem, Israel. She grew up in Brooklyn, then lived in Montreal for seven years, and then came to Israel, so she has been traveling, wandering, and exploring the world. 03:10 – Dr. Carla asks Libby to tell more about her book - ‘Dear Libby'. 05:15 - Different circumstances require different answers the same person asking the same question in a different situation might need to have a different answer, says Libby. 07:55 – Dr. Carla states that the best we could do is to try to when we do try answer or something to offer sound and sage advice or insights as possible. 09:08 - One of the reasons Libby loves children's books so much is because you can learn so much from them because of the purity. 11:15 - As children, we might think we could find a way to make it better for everyone, says Libby. 13:10 - Part of our journey is learning how to transform our pain and fears into joy, and doing it mindfully, states Dr. Carla. 15:30 – Libby highlights that not everybody knows how to do that, or what would be the perfect way to comfort us in any given moment. But there is someone in us who knows how to comfort you to comfort yourself. 17:00 - The last chapter refers to keeping growing because connecting with others helps us grow. 19:10 – Libby says, self-expression is a gift that we all have, and she learned to express herself from a very young age. 20:30 – Dr. Carla mentions whether it's cooking, gardening, writing, or singing, whatever it is when families make space for that you've made space for your children in that way. 23:10 - Libby believes that what makes a happy family whether we have one, nine, or twenty children is the calm, comforting presence of a nurturing parent. 25:25 – “I believe that everyone has transformational power of words within them.” says Libby. Three Key Points There's so much pain in the world and everybody's struggling with their challenges and difficulties. In a way when people read these painful stories they feel not alone but on the other hand, I think they're dealing with so much already. So why add to that why not bring more light stories, more happy stories, or positive stories? Libby mentions that as an adult, we get to realize that suffering, pain, joy, and hope they're all part of life. It's all that makes us living beings have a human experience where we grow from the pain we come out the other side with joy. Libby narrates ‘Chapter-6' of the book where you connect with others and also by expressing yourself and finding the vehicle through which you love to express yourself. Some people love to express themselves through them. Other people like to express themselves through painting but by expressing yourself you find your kindred spirits Tweetable Quotes “I had three in Canada and five in Israel.”– Libby Kiszner “There can be many answers and many options.” - Libby Kiszner “Life is uncertain answers are sometimes a little uncertain, so let's just explore.” - Dr. Carla Marie Manly “I was seven years old when I found the first book I read.” - Libby Kiszner “Some people say writing is so joyful, and other people will say writing is so hard.” - Libby Kiszner “How does that book tell us to take us on a walk into certain parts of your book, which I won't reveal because I think it's so fascinating.” - Dr. Carla Marie Manly “The ‘Dear Libby' book came out of 15 years of listening to questions.” - Libby Kiszner “When you express yourself you're like singing a song, you're in harmony with another person.” - Libby Kiszner “What a beautiful way of expressing it and I also love what you were talking about writing.” - Dr. Carla Marie Manly “Everyone can allow who they are to come through and whatever style wants to come through.” - Libby Kiszner “I can see how grounded, centered, and serene you are.” - Dr. Carla Marie Manly Resources Mentioned Helping Families be Happy Podcast Apple Dr. Carla Marie Manly Website LinkedIn Twitter Instagram Libby Kiszner Website LinkedIn Amazon Twitter Podcast Editing
In today's episode of the “Helping Families be Happy” podcast, host Christopher Robbins talks with Guest Dr. Carla Marie Manly, a practicing Clinical Psychologist, Wellness Advocate, and Author based in Sonoma County, California. Dr. Carla discusses her book ‘Aging Joyfully'. This book provides an important and meaningful window into womanhood for those approaching 50 and beyond. She also talks about the issues in the book that are not gender-specific. Episode Highlights 01:00 – Christopher mentions that Dr. Carla focuses on helping others achieve joy and balance from the inside out. She is the author of multiple books. 02:05 – ‘Aging Joyfully' - is one of those books that people of every gender can benefit from. 04:00 – Christopher asks, what are the unexpected delights of aging that Dr. Carla is referring to? 06:40 – The Gen ‘Z' & millennials seem to be far more willing to embrace self-discovery, mindfulness, intentional learning, and growing, which Dr. Carla is thrilled about. 10:34 – Dr. Carla believes that our chronological age is just a number. 12:30 – Christopher enquires how can we without remorse look back on our own mistakes and experiences while still looking forward to this unknown future? 13:50 - It's about learning from that experience, vowing not to do it again to yourself and to somebody who may have hurt making amends and moving forward, states Dr. Carla. 15:16 – If you're not able to forgive, it's about doing that work to see where is that lack of forgiveness coming from. 17;40 – Dr. Carla says if you are the person who was fortunate enough to have healthy behavior modeled for you, then those life lessons can be pulled upon and used for the rest of your life. 18:22 – “Why did you choose to work joyfully and what does that mean for you?” asks Christopher. 22:02 - If we learn how to attend to our joy which is one of the gifts that can come with the least amount of time we have as we get older. 24:28 – Christopher enquires from Dr. Carla that when she talks about wisdom and grace, what does that mean in terms of aging? 26:12 - We must cultivate our wisdom to see the impact we have on ourselves. 28:22 – Christopher asks about the women in our lives and what advice would Dr. Carla have for them as they interact with men. 30:40 – If somebody that we love is not taking care of themselves and we're afraid of their health because they're over drinking, overeating, using substances, or that sort of thing then instead of criticizing your partner, partner up with them. 32:55 – Dr. Carla mentions, the author of the book ‘Fatherhood' said, every man should want therapy in his marriage. Therapy is a must in every relationship in every marriage. 34:25 – As a Therapist, Dr. Carla personally takes it as a great privilege when people bring their issues to her and want to work on them. 35:01 - If you go and spend your money on a new car, or a new computer, that's only going to give you temporary pleasure why not spend some money on some good therapy and increase your joy. Three Key Points ‘Aging Joyfully' is one of those books that people of every gender can benefit from and truly women because we start having aging concerns, unfortunately, as early as our, women of every age can learn a lot from the book. She believes that people of every gender because our issues are so much the same. According to Carla - it's nice to have enough money to have a roof over our heads and to feel safe and have clothes that are comfy and all of that but most of the time we get distracted by it and we get distracted by society and we forget to attend to our joy. We have lost our wisdom. We are so in the pursuit of intelligence and facts and capturing more that we are on the verge of losing our sacred planet. Many intelligent people have the very little capability within their relationships with their relationship to their divine and to caring for the planet that gives us life, that's not wisdom. Tweetable Quotes “I believe that almost every issue in the book, including things like incontinence, and sexuality, are something that is not gender-specific. - Dr. Carla Marie Manly “No matter what age we are in life, we face physiological and mental issues that aren't gender-specific.” – Dr. Carla Marie Manly "I work with people of all ages and it's one of my great joys and a privilege that people let me into the most intimate places of their lives, places they don't share with their best friends or their partners or anyone else.” – Dr. Carla Marie Manly “We realize, oh my goodness, I'm just beginning to get to know who I am.”- Dr. Carla Marie Manly “Do learn more about who you are and who you want to be.” - Dr. Carla Marie Manly “Chronological age, I think is simply a number, just like a scale weight is a number, and it's meaningless.” - Dr. Carla Marie Manly “If I'm carrying resentment, it's harmful to me, it's harmful to you, the person I'm in a relationship with, and if I'm presenting myself am stuck in what I did wrong in the past. It's only causing me anxiety, stress, and depression.”- Dr. Carla Marie Manly “It seems like so much of what we learn as children is applicable for the rest of our lives.” – Christopher Robbins “The parents saying don't steal and the parents stealing or the parents saying don't use drugs, but the parents' using drugs. So, all of that conflict.” - Dr. Carla Marie Manly “If we cannot see the abundance around us the abundance of nature, the abundance of sky and water and all those things, then it becomes a circle of anxiety and depression.” - Dr. Carla Marie Manly “Wisdom is about knowing what is best, right? So, I can have the intelligence to create the world's most wonderful vehicle. But it takes true wisdom to be able to say, how will this help the planet?” - Dr. Carla Marie Manly “If I have a message for men about ‘Aging Joyfully', I didn't care if you're 20, 30, 40, 50, 60 or beyond. Therapy is not a curse, it is a blessing.” - Dr. Carla Marie Manly “It's not that it's a curse to be in therapy, it's a blessing. It takes great courage to go into therapy, and a great deal of work and perseverance.' - Dr. Carla Marie Manly Resources Mentioned Helping Families be Happy Podcast Apple Dr. Carla Marie Manly Website LinkedIn Twitter Instagram Podcast Editing
In today's episode of the “Helping Families be Happy” podcast, host Dr. Carla Marie Manly, a practicing Clinical Psychologist, Wellness Advocate, and Author based in Sonoma County, California talks with Gabe Jensen (Author-illustrator of his book ‘NEVERWOOF - The Dog That Never Barked). Gabe gives some insights about his book and takes us through the journey of publishing this book. Episode Highlights 01:10 – Gabe says this is his debut book, and it's something that he has been working on now for approximately 30 years trying to become published. 02:00 – At the age of 19 Gabe wrote a story which was about little creatures that are responsible for night happening. 04:10 – ‘NEVERWOOF' is such a good dog, and he never barks. Gabe says anyone who has a dog can appreciate a dog who doesn't bark a lot. 05:25 – Dr. Carla mentions, the upside/downside to the story is that NEVERWOOF is very calm, grounded, and impeccable, and yet, he might have to step out of that calm space to do something good to protect his people. 06:30 – The general message of this book is so beautiful. NEVERWOOF figures out a way to stay true to itself, while still helping his family as well as his house. 09:30 – An important part of the message in this book is to say that you're going to try things on that don't feel right but that is okay, reveals Gabe. 11:10 – Gabe is trying to carve out a little niche of a more classic, and very simplistic style with just two colors. He is hoping kids will respond and connect with the book. 13:15 - When we see a simple message as we're reading to a child, we know they are getting it on some level, no matter the age, and we are getting that reassurance, says Dr. Carla. 15:20 – Gabe refers to the gatekeepers while publishing the book - that for better or worse, even if the story fails and doesn't get published, he feels he is in integrity with himself. 17:30 – Gabe's father has been a big inspiration for him as he is a Science Fiction Writer. He was fairly well known. 19:40 – Dr. Carla asks Gabe to give about three or four takeaways for the listeners. 21:05 - If you're interested in creative pursuits, explore those even if you don't feel like you're an expert in any of them, stresses Gabe. 23:00 - If you love the work that you're doing, keep focusing on that and let that push you through a lot of the negativity that you might find. Three Key Points In this book, NEVERWOOF hears a fire engine go by; he follows the fire engine and saves a baby. But all the time he keeps this behavior of calm about him until one night when his family home gets invaded by a robber named Stinky Sue. Now he has to decide what to do. Is he going to stay true to himself? Gabe thinks that kids, and even adults, on the one hand sometimes struggle to be true to who we feel we are but at the same time, especially those kids and adults that may be shy, but they constantly feel the pressure to be kind of get over that. The key is to figure out a way to stay true to that part of yourself that may make you more of a quiet person, but at the same time, you can find your voice in a way that's true to you. Part of the reason that Gabe is so excited to publish this book is that he is looking forward to having the chance to read to kids of the age that this is designed for, which is four to six. It can be challenging sometimes when you're trying to publish a kid's book because most of the gatekeepers are adults including the Editors, Agents, Art Directors, and others. It can be hard sometimes to not lose track of the fact that you're writing for kids. Tweetable Quotes “I tried to publish my first book when I was 19 years old.”– Gabe Jensen “I did several board games and logic games.” - Gabe Jensen “We're talking about ‘NEVERWOOF' being an introvert and a very self-reflective introvert.” - Dr. Carla Marie Manly “I had to keep looking for where I could find my place in that environment staying true to self.” - Gabe Jensen “That is a big message of the book as figuring out how to tell what the right path is?” - Dr. Carla Marie Manly “I also designed the art to match the simplicity of what I feel that messages.” - Gabe Jensen “I remember as a kid, seeing books that were incredibly simple.” - Gabe Jensen “I have to fight against that impulse of writing to the market or writing to these gatekeepers.” - Gabe Jensen “If people get pleased, while you're staying in touch with yourself, wonderful, but to lose yourself to please other people doesn't go out very well.” - Dr. Carla Marie Manly “It's okay to speak a little bit of our false voice as you're trying to find your true voice.” - Dr. Carla Marie Manly “It's very important to be persistent especially if you're trying to do something difficult, like publishing a book.” - Gabe Jensen Resources Mentioned Helping Families be Happy Podcast Apple Dr. Carla Marie Manly Website LinkedIn Twitter Instagram Gabe Jensen: Website Instagram Podcast Editing
In today's episode of the “Helping Families be Happy” podcast, host Dr. Carla Marie Manly, a practicing Clinical Psychologist, Wellness Advocate, and Author based in Sonoma County, California talks with Guest, Dr. Laurie Hollman. She discusses her book ‘Playing with Baby'. This book guides using attuned interactions with your baby to create a strong parent-child bond. In each chapter, there are month-by-month play options and the research behind them. Episode Highlights 01:10 - Dr. Laurie says she is a Psychoanalyst, and she has worked with infants through older adults. But what prompted this book was when she became an Infant-Parent Psychotherapist. 02:33 – Dr. Laurie initially wrote only parenting books. The first book was called ‘Unlocking Parental Intelligence: Finding Meaning in your Child's Behavior' but the narcissism book was by chance. 04:32 – Dr. Carla enquires if parents who are in tune with their babies can help them not grow up to be narcissists. 06:41 – Dr. Laurie states that the focus of this book is on the baby's mind rather than physical milestones. 08:30 – The book focuses on parent-child collaboration and problem-solving. It's about understanding the meaning of a child's behavior. 10:01 – Dr. Laurie is teaching mothers how to observe their baby so they can see what's the message the infant is giving to the mother and then they will know how to respond. 10:37 – Dr. Carla enquires what would Dr. Laurie encourage parents to do to help support more attunement to their child and revel in the child's milestones? 11:44 – There's new research coming out on how the development of an infant in the first year has been impacted by the COVID restrictions, states Dr. Laurie. 13:19 – Dr. Laurie points out, she has tried to share with mothers that when you get back in the car or on the subway, however, you got to your pediatrician. Take off that mask and deal with that baby because she will have missed you and have got confused. 15:00 – Infants learn by seeing and they only see the eyes but their audio works. So, the baby in utero learns the voice of the mother. So, when a baby is born, they already know that sound so that it stays consistent even with a mask on so that's just reassuring, highlights Dr. Laurie. 17:25 – Dr. Carla mentions that we adults like it when our significant others make eye contact with us and how much more important that is for a newborn child who was relying on his mom and dad for everything. 19:10 – The research indicates further that both right and left-handed mothers hold their babies on the left side of their bodies to comfort their infants. 20:50 - A fantastic finding from first it said infants are motivated to identify patterns, footers, and sequences. 23:10 – Dr. Carla says, it's survival of our species that they need to be able to predict some amount of outcome and that we now have research that reassures us that yes, these little beings are there are some ways to train us our day. 25:56 - Once their (baby) eyes reach the target they look back at you because they want your feedback. See if they've isolated the right target, mentions Laurie 27:24 – Baby's gaze is going to alternate between his choice of target, which might be a toy, and your face until he sees that you have joined his attention, states Laurie 30:55 - We are accustomed to seeing mobiles, even advertisements hanging in the middle of the crib. That's not where they belong because that's not where your baby's first going to look. 32:48 – Dr. Laurie shares some illustrations from the book. 34:06 – Baby is learning something called ‘Object Constancy', which means that when an object is out of view, an object is out of view, it still exists. 36:00 – Dr. Laurie shares an illustration from her book of a seven-month-old baby named Samantha which is about Parent Psychotherapy Sessions. 41:38 – Dr. Laurie uses this example because mothers are people and mothers have mothers and things are going to interfere in your lives with playing with your baby and how you manage them is very important. 42:20 – Kazz is becoming an attentive mother even when her family situation is challenging, due to her own mother's emotional illness. 43:50 – Think about your baby's vision. A baby's line of sight or vision is most clearly focused at the distance of a person holding them. 45:06 - We have the mistaken belief that our babies learn to read when she's not that she remembers what pictures are all about. 47:03 – Dr. Carla points out, whatever we say be a good or not so good becomes part of who we are. When we're interacting with baby, whatever we say, or do babies imitate it. Three Key Points The key message in the book is, from birth, infants live in a two-person world and as per 50 years old research, babies were considered to be entirely symbiotic with their mother. We learned that they certainly depend on their mother and they need to be nursed or bed, but they do have minds of their own. It's a two-person world from the start, and that's a kind of exciting thing to share. If a mother, father, or primary caregiver is depressed then that is a very serious problem for a baby. You need another caretaker there as well who is going to fill in that gap where the baby is going to have trouble learning. You'll find that each chapter is a different month. So, each chapter will give a lot of information about how the research is easily understood and it will optimize your play choices. Tweetable Quotes “People feel like I took the clinical concept and made it very accessible to many readers. And that was my aim.” - Dr. Laurie Hollman “If you're a mommy listening or reading this interview, they will choose you over others with their gazes.” - Dr. Laurie Hollman “I can just see when you have a baby in your arms and mommy or daddy looking down at baby that attunement that you get from that gaze that locked Love Field gaze is where the child feels seen and safe. I love that.” – Dr. Carla Marie Manly “Recognition is the way the baby learns what's going on, and the way they relate to you and mothers at home don't wear masks. So that solves that problem since the kids go out, everybody has a mask on that's completely contrary to what an infant how do they learn” - Dr. Laurie Hollman “I saw her then with her mask off and I studied her, I just said you need to stay right there for a minute. I need to take in who you are.” - Dr. Carla Marie Manly “It's found that the right orbital frontal cortex and Vaccae area right behind your eyes sockets moderates the mother's abilities to understand for infants emotional choose and respond to their senses.” - Dr. Carla Marie Manly “The mother is as biologically programmed from her pregnancy to want to play with her baby in the first few days.” - Dr. Laurie Hollman “Mothers pointing her finger out their forefinger at the baby will follow her line of vision.” - Dr. Laurie Hollman “Play does not equal toys. Play is about the interaction; play is interacting with the baby.” - Dr. Carla Marie Manly “I have to tell you the red neon was very purposeful because babies like red, yellow, black and white.” - Dr. Laurie Hollman “We're so attuned to rapid activity that we forget babies need to think and take their time so we need to be patient and wait.” - Dr. Laurie Hollman “You can use anything you pick and put it under a blanket ticket app and your baby will want to do that over and over and over again” - Dr. Laurie Hollman “We know that Kazz is going to be worried about her mother. But even so, it doesn't distract her too much from focusing on Samantha.” - Dr. Laurie Hollman “How important that is to be compassionate with yourself and your situation. So, then you can also be compassionate in your interactions with your little one.” - Dr. Carla Marie Manly “Babies love novelty. So, if they see the same picture over and over, like with cardboard picture books, they may start to resent just so showing something else and they pick right up.” - Dr. Laurie Hollman “Babies learn from us very quickly by imitation. So, it's just wonderful to realize again no toys needed.” – Dr. Laurie Hollman “When interacting with a baby or even when you don't think you're interacting with baby, how important it is for us to model kindness, love compassion, our patients slowing down and being attuned.” - Dr. Carla Marie Manly Resources Mentioned Helping Families be Happy Podcast Apple Dr. Carla Marie Manly Website LinkedIn Twitter Instagram Laurie Hollman: Website Podcast Editing
In today's episode of the “Helping Families be Happy” podcast, host Dr. Carla Marie Manly, a practicing Clinical Psychologist, Wellness Advocate, and Author based in Sonoma County, California talks with guest Gina Sadilek, who will be talking about the importance of sensory play, her Etsy Shop, ‘A Magical Minute' and her Instagram @amagicalminute. Episode Highlights 01:30 – Dr. Carla asks if Gina's two daughters have anything to do with how she started ‘A Magical Minute'. 02:47 – Gina says that they sold somewhere around 600 kits that they've made, so it's been quite a whirlwind. 05:10 – Gina reveals that she has been talking to some physical therapists and they were telling her how useful it would be in physical therapy for improving people who have had strokes or something like that. 07:10 – Dr. Carla enquires Gina about her mom's favorite kit. 09:10 – Gina has got around 2800 Instagram subscribers and most of them are Moms. 11:00 – The guest talks about the importance of sensory play and the way she leaves that sensory play in with the books. 14:20 - It's been quite an interesting journey because due to COVID Gina couldn't send her daughter to preschool when she was three, and now it is so nice to see how she socializes with other kids. 16:10 – Gina had a very hard time when Isabel was a newborn. She says she is not a baby person so that was hard for her. 18:10 – They eat almost all meals together as a family and that's been good for their kids to be sitting around the table and talking. They don't do any devices during dinner time and mealtime which is so important. 20:45 – Dr. Carla requests Gina to share maybe one or two kernels of wisdom with the listeners. 21:00 – Gina shares that it is so important to introduce different sensory bases or tactile things to your kids, and then also just the concept of reading to your children. Three Key Points All the kits have play dough in them that Gina's mom makes by hand and then they include different kinds of little bits and bobs in there for the kids to play with. The construction kit includes construction cars, little signs that have railroad crossing on them, some rocks, and others. Gina states that she has been so lucky to connect with amazing women and moms out on the Instagram platform and it's been an interesting process. She got into replay setup with both of her daughters like introducing different textures, water play, and all of that. Dr. Carla mentions that a beautiful part about intentional parenting is that natural enjoyment that comes up because you love your kids and enjoy being with them. Tweetable Quotes “You partnered with your mom, tell me a little bit about how that happened.” – Dr. Carla Marie Manly “But my daughter ended up loving the construction kits.” - Gina Sadilek “What a fun toy it would be to join with your child or grandchild in using your using your kids.” - Dr. Carla Marie Manly “Now, a little bit more about your Instagram account.” - Dr. Carla Marie Manly “She's made a lot of great friends and she loves being there.” - Gina Sadilek “Yeah, babies stuff was just not for me.” - Gina Sadilek “We're very lucky and blessed that we're all able to sit down at the table together and eat dinner.” - Gina Sadilek Resources Mentioned Helping Families be Happy Podcast Apple Dr. Carla Marie Manly Website LinkedIn Twitter Instagram A Magical Minute Instagram Website Podcast Editing
© 2020-2025 Ivy Podcast Discovery LLC
