Podcasts about empowering ability podcast

Learn about the Open Future Learning training resource for supporters of people that have an IDD, & how Ben Drew is fighting the oppression of people with IDDs.   In this podcast/ blog I had a pleasure of speaking with Ben Drew, Founder of Open Future Learning. Ben has over 20 years of experience working with people with an intellectual or developmental disability starting as learning disability nurse, then going on to create an individualized housing and support service, and he is now the Founder of Open Future Learning. Ben is also an incredible storyteller and even though this podcast is lengthy, it is a pleasure to listen to.   Due to the length of the podcast, the blog is broken down into Part 1, and Part 2. In Part 1 of the blog, you will learn about the Open Future Learning training resource for supporters of people with intellectual or developmental disabilities (IDDs), and Ben's life journey to fight oppression and create ordinary incredible lives for people with intellectual or developmental disabilities. In Part 2 of the blog, you will learn about 3 foundational support principals for exceptional support. As always, all of these insights can be heard by clicking play on the podcast player below.     You can listen to this conversation in its entirety by clicking play on the player below, OR by clicking one of the following links to listen on your favourite podcast player; iTunes, Spotify, and Google Play.   What is Open Future Learning?   Open Future Learning is an Online learning resource 100% dedicated to the field of intellectual or developmental disabilities (IDDs). The platform is developed for support staff, but anyone that touches the lives of people with IDD can benefit from the resource. The platform has a wide range of learning modules (for example: abuse prevention to social valued roles) which are delivered as interactive multimedia books. Open Future Learning is known for their short films and they have an on-demand video library with just over 700 short films featuring the leading global thinkers on IDD. They have also created a new product called Side-By-Side learning.    Ben explains, “ We have the saying from self-advocates, ‘Nothing about us, without us’, but we don’t live up to this. Training is one of those things. So we developed ‘side-by’side’ learning. The person that receives the support and provides the support do the learning together. They are short 30-minute interactive learning modules."   Ben continues, "Much of the content is created in collaboration with many of the leading minds in the developmental disability community. It is a really financially efficient way to get people to access these leading minds, compared to only the select few that were able to go to a conference."   The platform is designed for support organizations and priced accordingly, however, if you are an individual learner or a family and you want access to this resource you can email Ben and he will help you to access this resource. Email hello@openfuturelearning.org       Ben Drew’s Mission To Fight Oppression and Create Ordinary Lives for People with IDDs:   Paraphrasing from the podcast, Ben shares his story:   “I grew up in the UK in a small town called Devon. On the outskirts of the town, there was a small community for people with IDDs. It was kind of like Camphill without the farm. My best friend from school lived in that community, his parents managed the community. He lived in this cluster of houses where people with IDDs lived. It was great because we played football (soccer) on demand, it was mostly guys, and I got to know all of these people in the best way. When these guys came into the town the way that other people interacted with them was different. They teased them, they spoke behind their backs about them. This always sat with me and it was the starting point to wanting to work with people with disabilities. Went I was 18 years old I went to a summer camp for people with IDDs in the US, and really enjoyed it. Then came back to the UK and got a job with a guy named Gary Kent. He lived in a large residential home with 20 people with IDDs. It was a hospital that had been converted for people with IDDs to live after the institutions closed. Gary lived there as well but decided he wanted his own home. He left and purchased his own home in a nearby village. When Gary came back to the residential home he said he had to close down the residential home. He had seen the other side of life. He was learning how to cook, he was in his own community, he had control over his life and his environment - and he wanted everyone else to have that.   There was a guy that lived there [in the residential home] that was physically abusive, and there was a guy that was a runner. When the runner chose where he wanted to live, he never ran away again. The guy who was a hitter moved into a home of his own and he stopped hitting people. You can be getting really good support and if the environment isn’t right and the location isn’t right - you can only so so much.”   Insight: This was a huge lesson for Ben when he saw the change in people when they got control of their lives. These oppressive environments occur in residential homes, but they can also happen within our family homes. Speaking from personal experience, my parents home became an oppressive environment for my sister Sarah (who has an IDD) due to a lack of choice, social isolation, and lack of transportation. Most of Sarah’s decisions were made for her and most things were done for her. Of course, these things were done with the best of intentions, but this caused more stress and anxiety on everyone in the household, everyone entering the household, and suppressed opportunities for Sarah to grow. Sarah has moved out of her parents home and into a home shared with me where she now has choice and control of her life.   Ben continues with a leadership insight:   “Vulnerability of leaders is important. Gary was always incredibly transparent. He would always share his mistakes and things he had messed up. The residential home was just another thing. In order to empower everyone else underneath him, he had to be that way. The people underneath him could also make mistakes, they could also mess-up. I see cultures in organizations coming down on people. If you make a mistake it is a warning, if you make 3 mistakes you aren’t allowed to do things anymore. That culture just doesn’t work.”   Ben then when on to set up service to help 100 people with IDDs over 6 years to buy or rent their own home, manage their own supports with their own budgets, in Bristol UK, using the formula Gary gave him. Ben then moved to New York, and that is where he started Open Future Learning.   Part 2 of this blog is coming on December 18th, with insights on 3 fundamental support principals that are foundational to great support. If you want to learn about these core support principals now, you can do so by listening to the podcast.   Ben is also the creator of memes that help to nudge people in the direction of being more accepting, more inclusive, and to develop the understanding of what it is like to live with an intellectual or developmental disability. Here are a couple of my favourites:           If you received value from reading this blog or listening to this podcast episode I encourage you to share it with someone else you feel would benefit.   You can also support this work by subscribing. This podcast and blog is supported completely by listeners and readers like you. Thank you to those that have supported by subscribing!     Love & Respect, Eric Goll         Resources:   http://www.openfuturelearning.org/   https://www.youtube.com/user/OpenFutureLearning   Email: ben@openfuturelearning.org       If you received value from this content please leave me a review on iTunes. By leaving a 5 star review on iTunes you make the Empowering Ability Podcast more discoverable, and more families will benefit. Click Here To Leave a Review on iTunes       The Empowering Ability Podcast is available on iTunes and various other apps so that you can listen while on the go from your smartphone!   Click Here To Listen on iTunes

In this episode, you will learn all about Personal Support Networks! You might have heard of support circles, circles, microboards, or aroha's (there are probably names I'm missing), but theses are all forms of Personal Support Networks. Rebecca Pauls, Director of Planned Lifetime Advocacy Network (PLAN), shares with us with us what a Personal Support Network is, how they can benefit you, and how to go about building one.   Rebecca is the Director of Planned Lifetime Advocacy Network (PLAN), a Vancouver-based social enterprise that partners with families and people facing social isolation to secure their future by mobilizing relationships and leveraging community assets. Since joining PLAN three years ago, Rebecca has led a complete re-design of programming to integrate principles of person-centred planning, ABCD, narrative therapy, and independent facilitation. After demonstrating the strength and flexibility of this community approach, Rebecca is regularly invited to consult with organizations about how it can be scaled and applied to population groups across North America.   You can listen to this conversation in its entirety by clicking play on the player below, OR by clicking one of the following links to listen on your favourite podcast player; iTunes, Spotify, and Google Play.   How did PLAN Originate?   Rebecca shares:   “PLAN is an advocacy group in BC, which started with a group of parents that came together and founded PLAN 30 years ago. These parents believed their sons and daughters could contribute and be included in the community. The work of PLAN is charting a new path that is full of opportunity for people with disabilities. They are thinking about the present, but also the future. What happens when we are gone? This is when the idea of personal support networks really began to mobilize.”   One of PLAN’s ultimate aims is to create a Good life for families, which includes; Friends and relationships, making a contribution, being empowered to make choices, a place to call home, financial stability, parents have peace of mind. The basis of all of these things is to have people and relationships to do life together with. One of the main tools used at PLAN to accomplish this is personal support networks.     What is a Personal Support Network?   We all have a network – a group of people we depend on for companionship, support and decision making. This typically includes our family, friends, and neighbors, but also professionals like counselors or financial advisors. This group can be considered your “Personal Support Network”, and it reflects your personal interests, abilities, and needs. The specific individuals will vary by person and may change over time. Some networks will include many, while others just a few people. (Reference: PLAN website)     What is the Purpose of a Personal Support Network?   Paraphrasing from the podcast Rebecca Shares:   To ensure that no one is alone or so no one is stuck in isolation. Sometimes we hear the saying that loneliness is the only debilitating disability. A personal support network is to ensure that everyone can live in an inclusive community. There are all sorts of things people in the network can do together and accomplish. At the heart of it is recognizing that we have the support that we need to live the life that we want and dream of for ourselves.     What are you seeing for people with Disabilities that have an intentional personal support network, vs those who do not?  Paraphrasing from the podcast Rebecca Shares:   “I think the difference comes in when the unpaid relational support is involved. When there isn’t a personal support network they might live a life where they don’t have friends. When a personal support network is involved and parents aren’t able to be involved, there are people that are there to play important and specific roles. At PLAN we have mentors to support families with building and maintaining these Personal Support Networks.   In different times in a person’s life, they might depend on a person’s personal support network in different ways. When they are a young person or things are going well they might do more fun and social things. At different points in life when challenging situations come up, or there is a need for planning and advocacy it might be more formal. You can often hear these networks being called natural supports, or circle of support, or microboard (which is the most formal way of setting up a personal support network). The most important thing is not what you call it, but in the way that people are working together. It is important not only for people with disabilities, but it is more like a way of being, and a way of living our lives. It is sometimes difficult to build or maintain those personal networks. PLAN has a community connector or mentors to help keep everyone connected.   How does someone build a personal support network?   Paraphrasing from the podcast Rebecca Shares:   “We start by getting to know who the person is, their gifts, what they think about, what they like to do, and the things that they care about. We build relationships based on common interests. When we build the network we focus on gifts and the uniqueness of each person. Then we think of who are all of the people in your life and build a relationship map. If there aren’t a lot of people in your life we think about if you did have people in your life, what roles would they play?   Then we look to the community. We believe that our communities are full of welcoming places and other people with gifts. When we look to build the connections we look for groups that are already in place. The role of the community connector is to create opportunities for the person to get connected.   Turning those relationships into a network is a matter of talking about what is important. We encourage people to share what is important in their life right now. The community connector can help to create the opportunities for people together.   As we reach a time where a generational shift is happening, the parents that created inclusion across the country are reaching their 70’s the rubber is hitting the road in terms of these networks and transition.   Building networks is a little bit counter-cultural, we are getting busier, and we are living more isolated lives, we don’t know our neighbors as much as we used to. ”   You can access the resources on building personal support networks (e-books and online courses) mentioned on the podcast in the resource section at the bottom of this blog).       Who plays the community connector role?   Paraphrasing from the podcast Rebecca Shares:   “Sometimes there is a natural connector in a person’s life. In other situations, the family might hire someone to play that role (Like the service PLAN offers). Some organizations train their personal support workers to take a network approach. The supporter will ask the question, who else can we involve?   Personal support networks usually come together every month or every other month to do some planning and to talk about what the priorities are for that month, and how they can support each other.”     What do personal support network meetings look like?   Paraphrasing from the podcast Rebecca Shares:   “Some are very structured and some are very natural. We plan based on what that person is comfortable with, what the current needs and priorities are. At PLAN every 6 months we create work plans. For the next 6 months, what do we want to accomplish? Do we plan events and celebrations, look for job opportunities, or find a new apartment. Each month the community connector will send a monthly update on the progress that is made.”   On the podcast, Rebecca gives examples of what support networks and roles people play in a support network can look like.   What are you currently learning at PLAN?   Paraphrasing from the podcast Rebecca Shares:   “PLAN has done a good job helping families build networks which have resulted in friendships and community contribution, but we are starting to really work toward helping people put those networks to work. Passing the baton from mom and dad to other people in the network, before we reach a crisis point and being proactive. Identifying the key roles, and what is the succession plan. Inviting network members and transferring the knowledge to the next generation. It is succession planning, what do we need to know and how do we start to pass this along. Roles like trustee, guardian or power of attorney, or more practical things like who is going to help this person go to the bank or transportation.”   PLAN has also developed a new planning tool that works to answer the question, do families have peace of mind? This is an interesting question because peace of mind is dynamic and it changes. This new planning tool helps families to understand if they have peace of mind in the different areas of life, and it helps families to think about what they need to do to get there. Listen to the podcast to learn more about this thinking that Rebecca shares.   A final message from Rebecca, “Personal support networks are about relationships. They are about living intentionally together and supporting each other and sharing what is important to us. For me personally, because of all of the changes we see happening in families and people sadly passing away, there is a real urgency for us to begin asking the question, ‘What does this {personal support networks] really look like?’, and, ‘Are we intentionally supporting each other?’. Do we know people that don’t have any relationships?, and asking ourselves, 'what we can do?'. There are all kinds of possibilities to connect and we just need to go after them."     If you received value from reading this blog or listening to this podcast episode I encourage you to share it with someone else you feel would benefit.   You can also support this work by subscribing. This podcast and blog is supported completely by listeners and readers like you. Thank you to those that have supported by subscribing!     Love & Respect, Eric Goll         Resources:   Safe and secure, by Al Etmanski    Online 6-week course called Personal Support Network Facilitation   Planinstitute.ca has several online resources in their learning center       If you received value from this content please leave me a review on iTunes. By leaving a 5 star review on iTunes you make the Empowering Ability Podcast more discoverable, and more families will benefit. Click Here To Leave a Review on iTunes       The Empowering Ability Podcast is available on iTunes and various other apps so that you can listen while on the go from your smartphone!   Click Here To Listen on iTunes

Joe Dale and I explore the untapped labour pool of people with disabilities, uncover the benefits of employing people with disabilities, and discuss approaches people with disabilities can take to gain employment.   Today businesses are asking, ‘Where do we find good people?’, and people with disabilities are asking ‘Where do I get a job?’. This podcast/ blog with Joe Dale, Executive Director of the Ontario Disability Employment Network (ODEN), explores these questions.   Joe has worked in the field of disability for over 35 years and spent much of that time addressing issues related to employment for people with disabilities. He is an internationally renowned speaker, speaking to business, governments, and not-for-profits on the issue of strategic engagement of people with disabilities in the workforce.   The Ontario Disability Employment Network (ODEN)   ODEN is a professional body of employment service providers united to increase employment opportunities for people who have a disability. They have over 110-member agencies, all in the business of helping people with a disability get into the workforce.   ODEN focuses on 4 core areas: Engaging and educating businesses on hiring people with a disability. They also support businesses to develop successful hiring practices. Supporting disability employment agencies with training that builds their capacities and skills. Advocating on employment for people with a disability to the provincial and federal governments. Engaging and educating other stakeholders that prepare people with disabilities for the workforce, including school boards and family groups.     The Employment Landscape   Paraphrasing from the podcast, Joe shares:   “There are a lot of barriers for people with disability to enter the workforce. However, there has been a drastic change in the last couple of years. Businesses are now moving from awareness of the benefits people with a disability can provide to their business, to how do we employ people with disabilities. And, thinking about what does it look like in our workplace?   We have done a lot of awareness over the last 10 years and this is starting to pay off. Businesses are also challenged with the labour shortages, so businesses are now looking at what was once considered non-traditional labour sources.”     Currently the unemployment rate is 5.5% in Canada, but what does that look like for people with disabilities?   Paraphrasing from the podcast, Joe shares:   “Statistics Canada reported that 49% of people with disability are not in labour market. This doesn’t include people who have never had a job or have given up on trying to find a job. For the 51% of people in the labour market, we are seeing anywhere between 16 – 25% employment rate. From this, we can assume people with a disability that are not working in Canada is around 70%.   In the US, they do their research differently, they show about 18% of people with a disability are working.”       What Do Businesses Need to Know About Disability?   Paraphrasing from the podcast, Joe shares:   “Businesses don’t know what they don’t know. Businesses aren’t fully aware of disability as a demographic. We try to illustrate what disability looks like in their community.   16% of Canadians identify that they have a disability across Canada. This is a very large demographic. If you add family and loved ones of those people, 53% of Canadian’s are impacted by disability. These people have a very strong connection to disability.   What would this look like in your place of business? We do this through case studies and by breaking down the myths and stereotypes..    We are shifting mindsets away from charity and pity, a mindset of contribution. This is what businesses need to see to get them to buy in and employ people with a disability in a sustainable way."     Learn can learn more about the Myths to employing people with a disability in this podcast/ blog with Laura McKeen.        What is the business case to employ people with a disability?   Paraphrasing from the podcast, Joe Shares the following case studies:     Case Study 1: Walgreens   Walgreens is a large pharmacy retailer in the United States that has inclusive hiring practices. In 2006, they opened a new distribution center in South Carolina. When staffing this distribution centre they started with the goal of staffing 1/3 of this workforce with people that have a disability. In the end, they hired 40% of their workforce with people that have a disability. At the end of the first year, this distribution centre was the most productive centre for all of Walgreens in the US.   A year later they opened a distribution centre in Connecticut and they went in with the same mindset and hired 45% of people with disability. It opened in 2007 and has had the highest production of all Walgreens distribution centers every year since it opened. They have a 63% reduction in employee costs! Lower absenteeism, lower turnover, and fewer workplace accidents. What they are seeing is higher productivity at lower cost. This equates to profits.   More on the Walgreens Case Study. Click Here       Case Study 2: Mark Wafer, Tim Hortons   Mark Wafer owed 6 Tim Horton’s coffee shops in the Greater Toronto Area, in Ontario Canada. 15% -20% of their staff was people who had a disability. Employees with disabilities had an 87% higher attendance rating, and no work injury claims. Mark’s coffee shops had a turnover of 38% in an industry where the average was 110%. At $4,000 per new hire, there was a significant reduction in costs. His employees with a disability had almost 0% turn over, and employees without disabilities had a 55% turn over, which was still half of the industry average. He put it down for employees being engaged because he is an inclusive employer.   These costs savings are often offsetting the costs of a little bit slower production or the cost of accommodations.   Additionally, prior to Mark selling his business, his coffee shops ranked #1, #2, #3, #4, #5, and #6 in key sales/ profitability indicators among 500 Tim Hortons coffee shops in Central Ontario.     More on Tim Hortons Case Study. Click Here     Additionally, Joe shares:   “Many businesses are contacting ODEN today to learn about how to employ people with disabilities. We would like to get to 16 -20% of employees in a workplace be people with a disability.   We also see the growth rate for people with a disability that get into the workplace their growth rate is phenomenal. Within 2 or 3 weeks they can become a different person and can exceed expectations. This is due to the opportunity, environment, and role modelling.”       How can families and agencies help people with disabilities to gain employment?   Paraphrasing from the podcast, Joe shares:   “It’s really about raising expectations. Overall our expectations of people with a disability are too low. We need to identify the goal that we have for people that have a disability. If the goal is for the person with the disability to have a job, we need to create a different path. We need to change the educational system to support this goal.   For families, if employment is a goal what happens at home has to change. We need to ask questions like, ‘What do you want to be when you grow up?’ and we need to ask ‘Do we give them chores?’. We need to raise expectations, have high goals, and change the path to support these goals.”   I agree with Joe, we need to think bigger and get out of the disability box. This requires a switch from deficits thinking to contribution thinking, and we need to be a champion for that individual. Once you have people holding low expectations of you, you live up to those low expectations. We live up to expectations, so hold high expectations and be a champion for people with disabilities by upholding their dreams and influencing others to do the same.     Joe shares:   “There is research out of the US that shows the indicators of labour market attachment for people with severe disabilities are: A single paid job while in high school Family members and others around that have high expectations   This leads to asking the question, ‘How do we mirror the experiences for people with disabilities the same as those around them?’ Peers and siblings. This includes responsibilities, chores, and part-time jobs. This helps the person to also learn what they like, what they don’t like.”     Learned Helplessness   What I have observed in my work is that parents and supporters are trying to be helpful by doing things for the person with a disability, but by doing this it creates dependencies. It teaches the person with the disability that they can’t do things. Now when that person with a disability is asked to do something they have learned that they ‘can’t’ do the task, even when they are in a new environment. In positive psychology, this behavior is called Learned Helplessness. However, this can be changed with learned optimism. By the way, my family has been caught in the learned helplessness trap. I am not judging here, simply pointing out my observations.       Work or Activities?   Paraphrasing from the podcast, Joe shares:   “It is a challenge when activities, like bowling or swimming, get in the way of the work opportunity. Generally, we don’t do these things instead of work. This is a values proposition that needs to be considered by families. The more conditions we place on work, the more difficult engaging in work becomes.”   Insight: Put the job first, remove the conditions on the employment.     What suggestions do you have for people with disabilities that are 25 to 45 years old, and have never been in the job market?   Joe shares:   “It might mean backing up a bit and starting with a part-time job that many of us would have had while in school. Such as at McDonald's. But don’t let the progress start there. We need to start creating that path.   The more experiences a person has had the better their decision making becomes on what they would like to do 1 to 2 years from now or even tomorrow.”       Fair Pay for People with Disabilities   Joe shares:   “Working for free, or saying the person doesn’t need equal pay is a very bad attitude. Society values people that work, pay taxes and contribute, and much more so than people that live off the tax system. To see someone contributing to the tax system in your community brings value to that person.   It is important for peers and supervisors to see that person as valuable. If two people are working side by side and one person is getting paid full wage, and the other person is receiving less than full wage, it tells the rest of the world that that person is not as valuable as the person making full wage beside them. That is a real damaging long-term scenario. The perception is that the person with a disability as being seen as valued is critical. I fight against anything that looks like less than a fair wage. If the perception is that the person is less valuable, who is the person that is going to be let go in an economic downturn? The person that is seen as less valued.   Also, It is a myth that by working the person will earn less money with the Ontario Disability Support Program (ODSP). No matter what the person earns they will always have more money in their pocket at the end of the day. They never lose never money by working. It is a fallacy that people will have less money if they work."     I agree with Joe’s perspective on fair wage. Additionally, consider the person with a disability that is receiving less than an equal wage. If that person is perceived by others as not valued, then they will not feel valued themselves. If I am not feeling valued I am not going to be excited about going to work. If you received value from reading this blog or listening to this podcast episode I encourage you to share it with someone else you feel would benefit.   You can also support this work by subscribing. This podcast and blog is supported completely by listeners and readers like you. Thank you to those that have supported by subscribing!     Love & Respect, Eric Goll         Resources:   ODEN Website: Odenetwork.com   Tim Hortons Case Study: Click Here   Walgreens Case Study: Click Here     If you received value from this content please leave me a review on iTunes. By leaving a 5 star review on iTunes you make the Empowering Ability Podcast more discoverable, and more families will benefit. Click Here To Leave a Review on iTunes       The Empowering Ability Podcast is available on iTunes and various other apps so that you can listen while on the go from your smartphone!   Click Here To Listen on iTunes

Learn from world class experts on housing for people with developmental disability.   I’m excited to bring you this podcast/ blog episode on the best of creating a home for people with intellectual/ developmental disabilities (IDD). In this episode, I have compiled audio clips that provide insights from 9 interviews I’ve completed with guests on creating a home for people with disabilities, along with my insights as a family coach. My desire to share this with you also comes from the experience of supporting my sister (Sarah) to create a home of her own over the last year. On July 4th 2018, Sarah moved out of our parent’s home and became roommates with me. This is Sarah’s first time living in a home of her own. There has been many events along the way that have come with incredible growth for everyone in our family, and support network.    9 Insights to Creating a Home Episode (I.e. Best of Home Episode)   This episode is a collection of insights shared by 9 guests who I consider as experts in the area of creating a home. Each guest has either directly been involved in creating a home for people with disabilities and/ or has evaluated housing services for people with disabilities. I’ve constructed this episode in a way that shares what I believe will lead to the best outcomes for people with disabilities and their families. You may agree or disagree with the perspectives shared in this episode, however, I invite you to consider these perspectives to determine what is true for you.    You will notice that I am using the language creating a home vs housing. I do this because housing refers to the physical building, and the physical building is only one component of what must be considered when creating a home for a person with a disability. When creating a home we must also consider the person’s other needs; their supports, their relationships, and what they will be doing once they are living in the space, etc..     Creating Your Home Workbook (Free)   Additionally, I have updated the ‘Creating Your Home Workbook’, to include these insights and perspectives. The original workbook was downloaded over 100 times, and I’ve sent the updated version to those of you who have already downloaded the original workbook. This workbook is designed to guide your thinking to create the best home for an individual with a disability, and to encourage you to take the first steps to make this home a reality!   Claim your FREE 'Creating Your Home Workbook!     The 'Housing' Problem:   If you are reading this blog you intuitively know that there are many additional considerations for a person with an intellectual/ developmental disability (IDD) when creating a home. Supports that exist to help vary by jurisdiction globally. Where I live, in Ontario Canada there is what many would call a housing crisis. As of 2016, the Ontario Government Ministry of Community and Social Services was supporting approximately 18,000 people with a developmental disability in group homes and other supported living, and an additional 9,700 people were on a waiting list for residential supports. So, the reported demand for residential housing support is over 50% greater than the supply. The demand is likely higher than reported because it obviously doesn’t include people who have not registered for the list. Reference: (The Toronto Star, 2016)     In many areas around the world there are long waiting list for people with a developmental disability in search of government supported housing. As you continue to read, I am going to outline that government supported housing is actually not the optimal solution for an individual with an intellectual/ developmental disability (IDD) in the majority of cases. You are better off designing and creating an individualized home that meets the desires and needs of the individual, which provides them control over their life.       9 Insights on Creating a Home for a Person with a Disability     1) The individualized one person at a time option is the best option for people.   (Michael Kendrick (PhD) is a well-known international consultant in Human Services. Michael is involved in consulting, education and evaluative work with many governments, private agencies, advocacy groups, community organizations, universities and colleges across the globe.)   In episode #047 I ask guest Michael Kendrick, “Why is investment in group homes an outdated idea?”   In Summary Michael Answers: Group Homes are based on the assumption that people with disabilities should live together. We [everyone else] chose to live with people we are compatible with. Group homes are forced shared living, and this often creates a stressful living situation. Investment in group homes creates the idea that it is the only option for people. Individualized one person at a time is much better because it gives you much more choice. The group home option is no longer at the leading edge. It is a dying service model.    Many jurisdictions have a freeze on the growth of segregated living across the globe.       2) The people living in group homes want a home of their own.   (Lynne Seagle, CEO of Hope House Foundation, a not-for-profit organization started in 1964 by family members, whom had sons and daughters with developmental disabilities, in Virginia, USA.)   Paraphrasing from podcast episode #045 Lynne Seagle shares,   “…finding out people didn’t want to live in group homes started with a survey. The survey asked the question, ‘Does everyone like where they are living?’ Everyone said yes. It was odd to ask 120 some folks a personal question and get the same answer. We then re-worded the question to, ‘How do you want to live?’. And, the flood gates opened. People answered 1 of 3 ways, from most dominant to least; 1) I want a home of my own, 2) people wanted a job (most people were in day programs or workshops), and 3) friendship and romance.   Lynne continues, “We [Hope House] had defined excellence as meeting all the rules – [our] paperwork was clean, [we had] no employee grievances, well-kept homes, and low staff turnover. We were looked at as the model in Virginia, USA. BUT, when we gathered these themes [truths] we reviewed our program plans and not one program plan addressed these needs of people. This was a daunting realization for our organization.”     As I reflected on my conversations with Lynne Seagle and Michael Kendrick, I thought about what it would look and feel like to live in a group home. I would be forced to live with people that I don’t know, and many of my freedoms that I enjoy would be taken away. I wouldn't always be able to do what I want to do, when I want to do it. I’d lose control of who is entering my home. This sounds terrible, and it is. Now to help you think about this further, there are similarities between group home living and living in a nursing home, or retirement home. When you think about living in a nursing home or retirement home do you get excited about the experience?   An important point to make here is that it is the model and system of group living that is oppressing people, not the people working in these models. The people are typically some of the most kind and caring people in the world. It is the model and system we need to think differently about.      3) Creating a home is about building a life, the house is only part of the picture.   (Ron Pruessen, is a father to Caroline, who has a developmental disability, is a member of Opportunities Mississauga, and he is the Chair of the Ontario Developmental Services Housing Task Force.  The Ontario Developmental Services Housing Task Force was given $3MM in annualized funding, which has funded 18 pilot projects from the 200 proposals submitted.)   In episode #016 I ask Ron Pruessen, “As father, someone that is involved with a family group, and the housing task force what have you learned along the journey about housing?”   Ron shares, “There has been a lot of learning and frustration. The Government [of Ontario] is not doing enough and has a limited menu of things that they are doing [in housing]. There are many great ideas at the grass roots level. The variety of ideas is enormous, people have been extremely creative in imaging their futures. Individuals have been doing the visioning, and they see the possibilities out there.”   [In my opinion, this highlights the importance of individual options.]   Ron shares, the most significant example of creativity he has seen is building partnerships. The community can provide the best solutions. Not just because you can mobilize financial resources, but also because you can develop a wealth of opportunities (educational, social, employment), and this is incredibly important. The house is an important part of the picture, but it isn't the whole solution. Community connections improve quality of life, but the government can't do this, we have to do this.     Ron shares important insights in episode #016, which I have summarized above. However, there is one point that we discussed in that I do not completely agree with, and I failed to address this point previously. Ron shares, “I think the assumption for many years is that this [housing for people with a disability] is a government responsibility. It is the equivalent saying people need health care, which is provincially funded in the province of Ontario…. It is the equivalent of what we do for senior citizens in providing pensions and support for housing opportunities. It is a government responsibility, there is no question about it, I would argue. And, I don’t think the government isn’t doing enough. But, it is also a community responsibility…. What the community can do will provide better solutions to the problems.”   I agree with Ron’s comments that many people do hold the assumption that ‘Housing’ for people with disabilities is a government responsibility. This is the mindset that many of us continue to hold and it is perpetuating the ‘crisis’ state many families find themselves in. I disagree that creating a home is fully a government responsibility. Here is the reason why... When we [families] hold the assumption that the government is responsible for housing for our loved one with an IDD we give away the power that we have. We can put ourselves in a helpless state, or victim state. When we have hold this mindset that the government is responsible we accept the menu of sub-optimal options that the government provides us, and this puts us at the mercy of long waitlists, in many jurisdictions. And, this is a waitlist for sub-optimal options! If we hold the mindset that the government is responsible for creating a home for our loved one we are at the mercy of the government, and we give up our control. The good news is that we can take our power back. If families are feeling like a victim of a ‘housing crisis’ [i.e. you are waiting for government solutions], I invite you to consider making a choice to become a creator and to take your power back. In other words, the idea here is an invitation to take an active role in creating a home, vs a passive role waiting for a sub-optimal government solution.   On the flip side of this point, I agree with Ron in that we need to keep advocating to the government that more funding is needed to support our families in implementing/ funding our one person at a time solutions to creating a home. I believe Universal Basic Income (UBI) is a possible solution to the poverty situation that many people with a disability face. A realization that I have come to is that, the government isn’t going to solve our problems, but they can be a part of the solution.   [If you want to learn more about UBI I recommend listing to Sam Harris’s interview with Andrew Yang on the Waking up Podcast.]         4) Give people their own front door, and separate housing and supports.   (Chris Woodhead is the Group Director of Housing and Business Development for Dimensions UK. Dimensions UK supports 5,000 with learning disabilities and autism spectrum disorder (ASD).)   In my interview with Chris, In episode #025, he shares, “Dimensions UK’s aspiration is for people to have their own front door. Not all of Dimensions UK’s accommodation is in line with this aspiration at this time. For example, some housing is larger scale accommodation with 10 people living in one large accommodation, but over time Dimensions UK looking to remodel for a smaller scale more personalized approach. Housing and support are generally separate. Dimensions holds a core value that where you live is important to quality of life (health and wellbeing), but people should be able to choose who supports them. You shouldn’t have to move if you are unhappy with your support. There is a delineation between the tenancy agreement and the support contract. We operate around choice and control. If we get their housing right, and we get their support right then we hope they will continue to choose us.”     Chris also shares the Activate Model they have been piloting, which considers 8 different domains in each person’s life; 1) Physical health and wellbeing, 2) Communication and social interaction, 3) The physical environment, 4) Skills, 5) Relationships, 6) Service Staff, 7) Service Management, 8) Wider organizations. [Again, the physical environment (the house) is just a component of the solution.] The early results of this model in practice resulted in a 60% reduction in challenging behaviour, and an increase in satisfaction for support staff. If you would like to learn more about the research visit the Dimensions UK website.      5) Housing is a Community Issue.   (Janet Klees has been involved in the lives of people with disabilities, their families, and allies in community for over 30 years. Currently, Janet is the Executive Director Durham Region Family Resources and Supports. Janet is the author of three books which are directly rooted in her experience with families, (We Come Bearing Gifts; Our Presence has Roots; Deohaeko Decades).     In episode #022, Janet shares, "Housing is a community issue, not a disability issue. In our most recent housing project, we partnered with Brockville and District Association for Community Involvement on a housing project called, ‘Housing is a Community Issue’. We asked families who were interested in housing to join us in discovering housing solutions together and 35 families showed up. This is incredible because we told the families up front that we don’t have any money to give. It shows how understanding families are that they are going to be part of the solution. Even in this housing crisis, people are still finding housing. With our project, we are thinking about what are the ways that people are finding to build, buy, rent, and to figure out housing. Then asking, ‘why can't these ways fit families that are looking for housing.'   This is an affordability issue, not a disability issue. If people need renovations it is a cost issue. We need to ally ourselves with all the people that are struggling for housing. There are organizations like Habitat for Humanity, and Options for Homes that we can ally with. If the Ontario Ministry of Community and Social Services (MCSS) is involved in housing they build a service, not a home. Families only have to think about their own son or daughter and think about works best.”   An important observation from Janet, “The change comes when the family realizes that this is their issue to work on.”     7 recommendations from Durham Region Families for for all of us (Government, organizations, and families) to think about as we work toward creating a good life for people with disabilities.     1. Home, housing and support are 3 different things and must be thought of separately.   2. Most housing challenges are affordability, not disability.   3. People with disability contribute to their communities, they are not a burden.   4.Getting good housing and support doesn't mean taking away the individual’s control of their life.   5.Providing renovation dollars allows families to be creative with their current home today (stabilize current situation) and allows for flexible housing in the future.   6. Stop funding congregated mega projects for people with disabilities, and disabilities / seniors. Commit to typical housing options and neighbourhoods.   7. Where there are families that are willing to create a home in community the government needs to support with resources. These are cheapest, most effective models, and they are currently the least funded [in Ontario, Canada].       6) A coach or independent facilitator can support you to create and implement your vision for creating a home (and a life).   (Jessica Cave, Creative Housing Supports Coordinator at Bridges to Belonging in Kitchener, Ontario. Jessica supports people with developmental disabilities and their families who are looking to make the next move in their life.)   In episode #031, Jessica shares that she supports families by helping to figure out what is best for the individual. Her organization starts with the belief that people can live in the community, and that they have the resources and readiness to make it happen. In other words, they start from a place of capability and abundance, which fuels us as creators!   Jessica takes a person directed approach and works directly with families in the Waterloo Region helping them to take this new mindset, and she facilitates the family through creating their vision for housing. Once the vision is created Jessica helps the family to think about what resources the family already has, such as, friends, community, support, and financial. Then they will think about and take the next steps are to bring the plan to life!         7) Creating a Vision: The Best Home for the Individual   (Marg McLean, Executive Director of Community Living St. Marys, and her team have been helping people with disabilities create their home, and support solutions since the 1980's when people were leaving institutions.)   In episode #013, I ask Marg “When thinking about creating a home, what should families be considering?”   Marg shares that people are going on the waitlist [for housing in Ontario, Canada] without thinking, talking, and planning what an ideal home looks like for them. (Note: This is exactly what my family did at the start of our housing search for my sister. Your family is not alone if this is the situation you are in currently.) What works well is for families to come up with a vision of what would be a good home in community.   Marg provides 4 guiding questions to begin your thinking on creating a vision for home:   Where do you want to live? What kind of building do you want to live in? Who do you want to live with? What supports will be needed for your home?   [Note: the free ‘Creating Your Home Workbook’ includes these questions along with other questions and exercises to guide you in creating your vision for your home.]     Also, in Episode #013 Marg shares the story of 3 individuals that her organization supported to create their home. I also share my previous experience of living with my friend, who has a disability. These stories might just give you some ideas and I recommend you listen to this episode!     8) No one can tell you the right answer. You have to figure it out for yourself!   (Keenan Wellar is the Co-leader of LiveWorkPlay, a developmental service agency that works to facilitate community connections and relationships in Ottawa, ON.)   In episode #017 Keenan shares his reply to families that ask him, “What should we do in housing?”   Keenan shares that this is a question is deeply personal, and it isn’t a question that he can directly answer for a question. So, when asked this question, Keenan takes a coach approach by asking a lot of questions in order to draw out the best answer for that family. A couple of questions that Keenan will ask are;   Where do most citizens tend to live in your community?   What are the barriers the barriers to living in 'ordinary' housing? Are they actually barriers?   Keenan also shares that he will guide families through a 'thought experiment' by considering what it would look and feel like to move in to an apartment, which is a typical first home for many of us moving out of our family home for the first time.   [This is included as an exercise in the free ‘Creating Your Home Workbook’]       9)  Be a creator: Start conversations, build relationships, and uncover community resources.   (Alice Mainland is the mother to Michael Mainland, who has a developmental disability. Michael is 39 years old, has a home of his own, a job, and a life in community)   In episode #023 Alice Mainland shares the story of her family’s journey to create an ordinary life with her son Michael. What I am highlighting from my conversation with Alice, is the creator mindset that she brought to the challenges that her family faced.   In summary from my conversation with Alice, 2 months before her son with an intellectual/ developmental disability (IDD), Michael, graduated from high school, Alice realized they had a problem; there would be nothing for Michael once school ended, and one of his parents would have to stay home to support Michael. As a result, the family would drop down to a single income. Alice started making phone calls to various support agencies, local government, and basically anyone with a phone number that might be able to help. The people she called were willing to help! With the support of a few agencies the family was able to piece together support for Michael, which allowed the family to stay a two-income family. It was a patchwork, but it was a patchwork that worked because people wanted to help.”    Later in the podcast episode Alice shares, “At 29, Michael had the opportunity to move out of [his parents] home because of a conversation 4 -5 years earlier when I was searching for support for Michael.”   Alice shares, “You don’t know what resources are available to you until you ask. “   If you received value from reading this blog or listening to this podcast episode I encourage you to share it with someone else you feel would benefit. You can also support this work by subscribing.      Love & Respect, Eric Goll         Resources:   You can dive deeper into each of the insights by reading the blog or listening to the full podcast episode for each guest.   1) The individualized one person at a time option is the best option for people. #047: Mindshift & Enlightened Attentiveness, with Michael Kendrick   2) The people living in group homes want a home of their own. #045: Uncovering the Truth: We are Oppressing People with Disabilities, With Lynne Seagle   3) Creating a home is about building a life, the house is only part of the picture. #016: Housing Mini Series Part 2/6 - "On a waiting list for 22 years - this is what I've learned", With Ron Pruessen   4) Give people their own front door, and separate housing and supports. #025: Housing: Giving People Their Own Front Door, with Chris Woodhead   5) Housing is a Community Issue. #022: Lessons in Building Community, Housing, and a Good Life, with Janet Klees and Members of the Deohaeko Support Network   6) A coach or independent facilitator can support you to create and implement your vision for creating a home (and a life). #031: Innovative Ideas and Mindsets to Housing, with Jessica Cave   7) Creating a Vision: The Best Home for the Individual #013: Housing Mini Series Part 1/6 - Creating a Home, With Marg McLean   8) No one can tell you the right answer. You have to figure it out for yourself! #017: Housing; "What Should We Do?", With Keenan Wellar   9)  Be a creator: Start conversations, build relationships, and uncover community resources.           Download your FREE copy of the ‘Creating Your Home Workbook’           If you received value from this content please leave me a review on iTunes. By leaving a 5 star review on iTunes you make the Empowering Ability Podcast more discoverable, and more families will benefit. Click Here To Leave a Review on iTunes       The Empowering Ability Podcast is available on iTunes and various other apps so that you can listen while on the go from your smartphone!   Click Here To Listen on iTunes    

Author and speaker, Donna Thomson, takes us on the journey of a caregiver.   In Episode #050, I had the pleasure of interviewing Donna Thomson and we dove into the topic of caregiving. Donna is an author and speaker on issues relating to family caregiving, disability and aging. She is a patient and family advisor on health research and policy. Donna teaches family caregivers how to advocate for care in hospital and in the community.     If you find this read interesting you can listen to the conversation in its entirety by clicking play on the player below or searching ‘Empowering Ability’ on your podcast player, such as, Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Google Play.   Before my interview with Donna I took the opportunity to read Donna’s first book, ‘The 4 Walls of my Freedom’, which really helped me to gain perspective on what it is be like to be a mother with a child that has medical needs. It gave me perspective on what it must have been like for my own mother, when faced with the medical challenges my sister experienced at a young age. Quoting Donna from her book, “Mothering a child with medical needs is a very public, but lonely endeavor.”     On the podcast I ask Donna, “Can you share your experience so that others listening can also understand your perspective? And, so other mothers maybe don’t feel so alone?     Paraphrasing from the podcast Donna shares, “My son, [Nicholas], has CP [cerebral palsy] and a complex disability. At 4 months [old] he was diagnosed, and it was like he became the property of health care and social care systems. We began to be assessed and I felt as though I was under a microscope. [I was] Grateful for the assistance because you feel like it is the key to the future success of your child, and you want to present as a competent parent. Then you learn when you present as a competent parent that’s reason for people to abandon you. If you seem to be doing well then people aren’t going to help you. In order to access the help you need at home you have to demonstrate failure as a parent. What do these assessments and scores about my baby say about me? Am I a success or failure as a parent? All of this brought the bond between my son and I closer and we would have very intimate moments when alone at home.”   I ask, “Do you feel that this pushed you into being a victim?”   In summary Donna replied, “Not exactly. We had to demonstrate to the system what our needs where, and to do that they had to show them that they were struggling.”     Finding Pleasure in Peeling the Potatoes:   In a previous conversation with Donna it came up that she had to find pleasure in peeling the potatoes and this connects directly to her book title ‘The Four Walls of My Freedom.’ On the podcast, I ask Donna, “Why do we need to find pleasure in peeling the potatoes? And, how do we do that?”   Paraphrasing from the podcast Donna shares, “I can’t leave my house, so how can I make a rich life of this? Watching the lady peeling the avocados next door through the window, [I admired] the way she was able to peel the avocado without breaking the skin was beautiful. I started thinking I can do that. Then I started thinking about how well I am peeling vegetables. It was sensual, secondly, I was feeding my children. I linked what I was doing with the purpose of what I was doing.     I started thinking about the tiniest things that I was doing as forms of meditation, and it made me happy. I wasn’t doing anything differently, I was simply looking at myself doing the jobs of feeding the kids, doing the laundry, and making the bed.   Locating the extraordinary in the ordinary. We have the benefit of the slow movement lived loud in our families. We do things more slowly, we are more contemplative, we do things more purposefully. There is opportunity in finding meaning and joy in the way we live.”     Everyone is a Caregiver.   Donna shares, “The word caregiver applies to everybody. At the end of the day we are talking about dependency needs met by someone else. A pet, a friend, we all look after each other even when we are perfectly healthy in the prime of our lives. You are not feeling good I will bring you over some soup. We don’t have anything in our society to say that caring for someone is okay. The pendulum has swung so far away from providing care [being accepted in our society].   In my first conversation with Donna, she helped me to realize that I am a caregiver. When I was honest with myself it was the truth, and it felt weird. My ego didn’t want to accept this language because of the societal stigmas that are attached to caregiving. At first, it made me feel weak. Upon reflection, and acceptance that I am a caregiver there is a strength that comes with being a caregiver. Caregiving is one of the most connected and real human experiences that we can have, it has been wired into our biology as we have evolved as an advanced species. As Donna shares, “Everyone is a caregiver.”    So I ask you, how are you a caregiver? I invite you to celebrate that you are a caregiver, and not to fight it or deny it. What are the benefits that caregiving brings into your life?     Donna's Life as an Activist:   Paraphrasing from the podcast Donna Shares, “My idea was do to a post mortem on our family experience and the support that we received, or did not receive, and to determine what was helpful and what was not helpful. I thought this would be useful for other families and policy makers. I became involved in inclusion. I became active in the family movement, and I became involved with the Ottawa affiliate for PLAN, which is all about citizenship.   I became aware of and met Indian economist, Amartya Sen, who developed ‘The Capability Approach’. The Capability Approach looks at how people can be supported by the community and the State so that they can have a life that they value. It is about individual choice and being supported to have a life that you value within circumstances of adversity. Sen was looking at extreme poverty in India, but I used this approach to look at my family.”     Donna used this approach in her book 'The 4 Walls of my Freedom’  looking at how people can make personal choices, express their personal values, and live in the community to do this. Donna and I further discuss inclusion, and I recommend you listen to this episode to hear these perspectives.     Donna's New Book:   I’m co-writing a new book with Dr Zackery White, a professor at Queens University in Charlotte North Carolina.   Donna shares, “Dr. Zackery White is writing about Caregiver identity and how it is so difficult to express the transformations that happen when giving high levels of care to someone. Lots of things grow and lots of things die when you become immersed in giving care to someone. Giving people language to create the narrative to understand your life in the now.   My part of the book is the what’s next. What can you do to be an advocate and take action; personal support networks, what are the assets in your community [asset based community development], and online tools including support groups. These are actions you can take to thrive in situations of adversity. It will be titled something like ‘Transformations in Caregiving’ ”.       I thank Donna for coming on the podcast and sharing her deeply personal experiences, and her insights on caregiving. Thank you for doing the work you do Donna!   If you received value from reading this blog or listening to this podcast episode I encourage you to share it with someone else you feel would benefit.     Love & Respect, Eric Goll         Resources:     Donna's Blog: The Caregivers' Living Room  www.donnathomson.com   Book  ‘The 4 Walls of my Freedom’– Available at any major book seller.   Facebook Group - The caregivers living room       If you received value from this content please leave me a review on iTunes. By leaving a 5 star review on iTunes you make the Empowering Ability Podcast more discoverable, and more families will benefit. Click Here To Leave a Review on iTunes       The Empowering Ability Podcast is available on iTunes and various other apps so that you can listen while on the go from your smartphone!   Click Here To Listen on iTunes            Tags: #Caregiving #Donna Thompson #WeAreAllCaregivers

Dr. Yona Lunsky discusses state of mental health and developmental disability, how to notice mental health challenges, and different treatments.   In this episode, I welcome Dr. Yona Lunsky on to the podcast to talk about developmental disability (DD) and Mental Health. Dr. Yona Lunsky is Director of the Azriei Centre for Adult Neurodevelopmental Disabilities and Mental Health, and Director of the Health Care Access Research and Developmental Disabilities (H-CARDD) Program at CAMH. She is Professor and Developmental Disabilities Lead in the Department of Psychiatry at the University of Toronto and Adjunct Scientist at the Institute for Clinical Evaluative Sciences (ICES). In this episode we discuss Dr. Lunsky’s journey into the field of mental health and developmental disability (DD), the state of mental health in the developmental disability community, how to notice mental health challenges, and the different treatment options available.     Below is a summary of some of the highlights from my conversation with Dr. Yona Lunsky. If you find this read interesting you can listen to the conversation in its entirety by clicking play on the player below, or searching ‘Empowering Ability’ on your podcast player, such as, Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Google Play.     On the podcast, Yona shares that she has an older sister who has a DD, and she tells us about her family experience. She also shares what led her down her career path to support people with developmental disabilities experiencing mental health challenges. Take a listen to the podcast to hear more of Yona’s Journey.   Why should we be talking about health in the Developmental Disability (DD) community?   Paraphrasing from the podcast, Yona shares, “When we are healthy we get to enjoy our lives. When we are unhealthy it restricts us; work, where we can live, how much money it costs day-to-day [living expenses], and the activities we can do. We know people with DDs are less healthy, and have more health problems than people that don’t have DDs. There are lots of reasons why they [People with a DD] are less healthy. It isn’t necessarily the disability, the disability itself is not a sickness, but how they manage their health, and the barriers that come up for people with DDs can impact their health.”     Mental Health in the DD community.   Yona shares, “The likelihood of having a mental illness is much greater for a person with a DD than without. In the general population 1 in 5 people experience mental health challenges. Through H-CARDD we looked at the number of people under 65 [years of age] with a DD that were given a psychiatric diagnosis over a two year period, and found it was 2 in 5 people. These problems are more common for people with DD, and they are less likely to get the help that they need. People with a DD are less likely to understand their emotions, and [are less likely] to be able to put language to it. This puts them at a disadvantage.”     What Does Dual Diagnosis Mean?   Having a DD and also having a mental health problem at the same time.   Diagnostic Overshaddowing   Yona explains, “If someone with a DD presents with symptoms of depression, the clinician might but look at the person and say oh that is your disability, and miss that the depression is actually there, and it may go untreated.”     Why might mental health be a larger challenge for people with a DD?   Yona explains, “What makes us feel healthy? Are we engaged in meaningful activities?, Do we have strong friendships?, Are we included?, Do we have opportunities to contribute?. People with DD are at a disadvantage here and this all impacts mental health. If the person themself can’t recognize there is a problem, then it becomes up to others to recognize there is a problem and we are worse at recognizing there is a problem when someone has a DD. By the time we do notice, it can be pretty late in the game, and this makes it even more difficult to help them.”   I ask, so what are the antidotes to poor mental health?   Yona shares first there are things we can do to prevent mental health challenges:   Things like bullying are clearly related to mental health, and we can give people skills so they know that to do in these situations. Building positive social relationships. These are reciprocal relationships and they are not stressful or demanding too much of you.   Doing things that are meaningful and important for you.   Yona explains the importance of taking action on these prevention steps for young adults with a DD, “There are many people who have mental health issues who are hospitalized in young adulthood. I don’t think this is a coincidence that this happens since when you finish school your activities, your friends and the people who know you really change. Not having anything to do during the day, and watching tv in the basement, losing friends, failing because there isn’t the right supports, all of this impacts your mental health.”   How do we help someone that might be experiencing a mental health challenge?   Yona shares, “Be a detective and notice what has changed. What is different now than before and be able to provide examples in daily life. It is important to notice the change, and it is easier to treat when there is a small mental health issue emerging.”   Yona promotes using the ‘HELP’ model when examining an individual’s mental health.   Yona explains the model on the podcast:   H - Health. First we need to look at what is going on in terms of health that could have changed. Is there a physical change? One thing that looks like depression is hypothyroidism, but this has nothing to do with depression. Constipation is one of the biggest issues leading to aggregation and discomfort for people with DD. And, this is often missed because the person might not be able to put the language to it.   E - Environment. What is going on in the environment? What are the supports and expectations right now? Are things stressful? Too demanding?  Are people expecting too little? Is there a good match between her situation, and what she feels she is able to do? If the match is poor than address it.   L - Life Events. What has happened in the past that might be contributing to this issue? Bullying, ostracized, loss (experiencing grief), etc..   P - Psychiatric. Once health, environment, and life events are examined - could it be depression or anxiety? Treatment for these mental illnesses could include engaging in activity, seeing a counselor, medication, etc.   Families can use this model in order before going to get help from a medical provider, and families can use this model with their mental health professional.     Treatment with Medication:   Paraphrasing from the podcast Yona shares:   “The research shows that the likelihood of being prescribed several medications at the same time is not small [for people with a DD]. These medications interact with each other, and cause other problems. These medications can help, but they can also harm.   In Ontario Canada, medications are paid for (antidepressants, etc) under the disability program. But, other services such as psychotherapy are not covered. The likelihood of fulfilling prescriptions are high, and the most commonly prescribed drug to people with DD are not for cholesterol, diabetes, or asthma, they are for psychiatric issues. The most commonly prescribed drug are antipsychotics. These are pretty heavy duty drugs which require a lot of monitoring.   If doctor prescribed medication to me, I would go on the computer and look at it, get a print out from the pharmacy, I would look at the side effects, and tell the doctor right away if I was noticing any of them. [However,] people with DD aren’t always able to notice the side effects, or to understand why they are taking the medication.”   ** Disclaimer: Do not just stop taking any medication that your doctor may have prescribed to you. Let this be a prompt to you to have a conversation with your doctor about your experience using your medication(s).     Let’s Talk About Mental Health   Yona’s final message is, “It is important to talk about it [mental health]. If we don’t talk about it we don’t solve anything by avoiding the problems. Mental health is just as important as any physical aspect of our health.”   On the podcast we discuss some practical ways on how to start the conversation on mental health. Take a listen!   If you received value from reading this blog or listening to this podcast episode, consider sharing it with someone else you feel would benefit. Coming soon there will be a way for you, or your organization, to contribute to this work. Stay tuned for the details.     Love & Respect, Eric Goll         Resources:   - Talk to Dr. Yona Lunsky on Twitter @yonalunsky   - Books beyond words   - H-CARDD Health Tools for people with disabilities and caregivers   - More on The HELP model   - Dual diagnosis resources from CAMH   - A Family guide to dual diagnosis    - Video of Dr. Yona Lunsky discussing the HELP ideas             If you received value from this content please leave me a review on iTunes. By leaving a 5 star review on iTunes you make the Empowering Ability Podcast more discoverable, and more families will benefit. Click Here To Leave a Review on iTunes       The Empowering Ability Podcast is available on iTunes and various other apps so that you can listen while on the go from your smartphone!   Click Here To Listen on iTunes

Ted Kuntz shares his journey of personal transformation as he realized the who he wanted to be in the world with his son Joshua and with others. Ted Kuntz is a gifted psychotherapist and the author of the best-selling books, Peace Begins With Me and 8 Weeks to A Better Relationship. Ted has a Master's Degree in Counseling Psychology and more than 25 years experience as a clinician and a consultant. Much of Ted’s wisdom has come from his personal journey as the father of a child with severe disabilities. Ted's journey with his son Joshua taught him how to make peace with life and to take full advantage of the gifts and opportunities life offers.  Below is a summary of some of the highlights from my conversation with Ted. If you find this read interesting you can listen to the conversation in its entirety by clicking play on the player below, or searching ‘Empowering Ability’ on your podcast player, such as, Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Google Play. I was fortunate to meet Ted at Partner’s for Planning’s Art of Resilience event this year, where I told Ted that I saw his talk the previous year at the Art of Belonging. It was one of the most inspiring talks that I’ve experienced, and Ted’s stories went straight to my heart. When I met Ted I shared my gratitude for his talk and vulnerability. I also shared that I had purchased his Book “Peace Begins with Me.” But embarrassingly, I hadn’t read it yet. I invited Ted to join me on the podcast, and I promised myself that I was going to read his book. We both kept our promise, and I am happy to bring you insights from Ted Kuntz!     Ted’s Journey (so far):   I’ve paraphrased Ted’s story from the podcast episode below and quoted some important conversations Ted shares.   “It has been a very challenging journey, but very rich journey. It took me while to embrace the rich journey. At 5 months of age my son Joshua was damaged by a vaccine shot and developed an uncontrollable seizing disorder resulting in a neurological injury. This injury resulted in 24-hour care for the rest of his life and significant disabilities. In February 2017, Joshua passed away.”   Josh transformed Ted as a father and human being in ways that Ted could have never imagined. I ask Ted on the podcast, “Are there moments or experiences of transformation that you can share with us?”   Ted shares that there are two experiences that he has identified as the most transformative, the first was when Ted went to see a Physic:   Ted asked the physic: “Will my son live?”     Physic: “Have no fear the son will outlive the father.”   Ted: “If my son will live, what will he be when he grows up?”   Physic “Your son will be what he already is, and that is a teacher.”   Ted didn’t understand how his son would be a teacher at first, but the words sat with him. What he came to realize is that Joshua was here to teach him about being a human being. He was here to teach acceptance, forgiveness, gratitude, and working through human challenges.     The second transformative experience that Ted shares on the podcast is his daily ritual with Joshua. When Ted pulled into the driveway after work he would see Joshua at the window saying, “Hi Dad”. When Joshua wasn’t at the window to greet Ted, Ted knew that Joshua wasn’t having a good day. On this day, Ted pulled into the driveway and he stood there looking at his son in joy, and a voice inside of Ted's head asked him this question, “When your son looks through the glass at you what does he see?”   Ted reflected on this powerful question, and Ted found the truth; Joshua sees a father who is angry, afraid, and a father who is rejecting his son. Ted committed that day to make peace with his situation, to accept it, to claim his joy, and to fall in love with the son he had. That was the day Ted’s life began to change.     Insights:   Eric shares, “For us to have these transformations we need to embrace these moments and let ourselves bring these questions and experiences into our consciousness to find our truth.”   Ted shares, “The transformation came out of an intense amount of suffering. Suffering can be one of the gateways to wisdom.”       I ask, “How do you shift out of suffering state to a state of joy?”   Ted replies, “Take responsibility for emotional, physical, mental, and spiritual state of being. We often give away our power – something else is responsible for our happiness, peace and joy. [For example,] I’ll be happy when Josh stops seizing. If I hold the story that my happiness is dependent on Joshua’s seizing stopping, then I couldn’t be happy. We need to claim ownership of our way of being in the world. I make me happy, I make me sad, I make me angry. Why would I make myself angry? It doesn’t serve me and the rest of humanity by staying in that [angry] state for a long period of time. I can release it any point.”   “I believe when we are operating at our highest potential as human beings that we are living life as creative beings. That we are creating the next moment. Unfortunately, I spent the first 45 years of my life as a reactive being.”     The Hidden Gifts of Disability   Ted Shares, “It [disability] challenges us in a way that we are forced to respond. At first it moved me to those darker places, but I’ve since learned there is a healing that comes about when there is an acceptance. I’ve chosen to live in peace and joy, because my son deserved that. It changed me as a father, a husband, a brother, a son. It made me a better person.”     Ted shares the story of Joshua’s grade 7 teacher:   Paraphrasing from the podcast Ted shares, “When Joshua was entering grade 7 there were 2 male teachers, who were athletes, selecting students for classes for the upcoming year. They decided to do a coin toss for who would pick first. The teacher who won the coin toss looked at the list of students and selected Joshua as the first pick. The other teacher asked, ‘Why Josh? He requires a wheel chair, has an uncontrolled seizure disorder, he has many other needs.’ The other teacher replies that he notices how the kids excitedly greeted Joshua in the morning, how they gently took off his coat, how the other kids altered the rules of the game so Joshua could play at recess, how the children where there laying on the mat with Joshua as he recovers from seizure. If Joshua is in my class it will make it a kinder and gentler place for everyone.”   This teacher helped Ted see Josh’s gifts. Ted was now able to look at Josh with a different set of eyes.   Ted shares, “Is the glass half full or half empty? It is both. Do I look at the full parts, or do I look at the empty parts? We have been socialized to believe that success looks a particular way. What people like Sarah [my sister] and Joshua do is that they remind us that there are other qualities to aspire to. There are things that I wasn’t going to learn from a book, I needed to be in relationship with a person more vulnerable that myself. This is a challenging journey. Let’s not just look at the parts that are difficult, lets also look at the gifts that can be realized out of this journey. Let’s not lose that opportunity to experience some significant transformation as a result of this life experience.”   To embrace this mindset that everybody is a gift to us, Ted plays a game with himself. He asks himself, ‘Who is going to show up today?’, and ‘What gift do they have for me?’, ‘What gift do I have for them?’.  It forces him to appreciate everyone he interacts with.     In this episode, Ted also shares the native story of two wolves - the negative and positive wolves fighting our hearts, a tool to find more joy in our lives, and we discuss David Hawkings map of consciousness. Listen to the podcast for more on this!   Ted leaves us with this message to consider:   “Your way of being is actually more important than what you do. We would be better off if we made 'To Be:' lists every day, rather than 'To Do:' lists. Be gentle and kind to ourselves. We are on a journey of development. One of the things that I believe is that we don’t make mistakes, we actually make the best decision available to us at that moment with the information, skills, and knowledge that we have.”   I am grateful for the stories, insights and rich conversation Ted gave us.     If you received value from reading this blog or listening to this podcast episode, consider sharing it with someone else you feel would benefit. Coming soon there will be a way for you, or your organization, to contribute to this work. Stay tuned for the details.     Love & Respect, Eric Goll         Resources:   Book: Peace Begins With Me           If you received value from this content please leave me a review on iTunes. By leaving a 5 star review on iTunes you make the Empowering Ability Podcast more discoverable, and more families will benefit. Click Here To Leave a Review on iTunes       The Empowering Ability Podcast is available on iTunes and various other apps so that you can listen while on the go from your smartphone!   Click Here To Listen on iTunes  

Brian shares his story of multiple health challenges and family adversities, and his insights about how we can re-write our story and take control of our lives.   In this episode, I have an engaging conversation with life coach, Brian Raymond King. Throughout Brian’s life he’s been a student of adversity as he experienced multiple health diagnosis including; cancer, ADHD and MS – as well as going through a divorce, and being a single parent to three children with ADHD. Brian shares his story and his insights about how we can re-write our story and take control of our lives.   On the podcast Brian shares:   “It’s a matter of doing what you can with what you’ve got. In situations like mine, you don’t just give up on life and let it pass you by because you can’t do everything each day that you can do on your best day. Some people use their best day as their standard, but that is ridiculous because life ebbs and flows. Depending on where I’m at that day, I think about what can do and I show up and do 100% at it.”     How have you bounced back from each challenge in your life?   Paraphrasing from the podcast, Brain Shares:   “With each new diagnosis there is that oh crud moment. This is usually brief. But, grumping and groaning will not change the situation. Then I shift to what do I need to know? What resources are available? What books do I need to read so I can manage this? At some point being resourceful just stuck.”     What tools do we have in our toolkit to be resilient?   Paraphrasing from the podcast, Brain Shares:   “First off, there is noise that makes it difficult to use the tools [we have]. One of the most annoying offenders is the ‘shoulds’. It [life] should be this way, or it should be that way. Once we stop ‘should’ing’ all over ourselves, we can take the first step toward a solution. Maybe you don’t know what the solution is yet, but you can start problem solving.”     What about when the problem seems so bad, or too much to handle?   Brian asks his coaching clients, “Do you honestly believe that? Or, is that honestly true?”   Brian helps his clients think through if they want to be a victim of the situation or if they want to be resourceful and take charge by asking questions like:   “Do you want to be helpless or do you want to be in charge? What can you be in charge of right now? You can be in charge of your thoughts.”     In my coaching practice I often ask clients, “What assumption are you making?” This is a powerful question to help us realize the stories we are creating based on incomplete information. (Also, our assumptions tend to lean toward being negative.)     Mindset vs Skillsets:   Paraphrasing from the podcast, Brain Shares:   “You can have the best tools in the world [skillsets], but if you don’t believe in yourself [mindsets] you might not even want to use those tools [skillsets].   Brian believes we must first develop or mindsets, which is comprised of our belief systems to get the most from our skillsets.   I ask Brian, How do we develop our mindsets and beliefs?   Brian shares, “Studying biographies. Don’t just listen to what they did, it is important to look at the decisions that they made, and the beliefs they hold. It is their beliefs and thoughts that led to their results. Try adapting to that belief for just a day - I am going to act as though this belief is true, and I am going to see the world through this lens. For example, you are a much different person if you believe that people are good at heart, vs people are just out there to screw you over. Things are first created in the mind, then in the real world.”     Who is one of your most influential mentors?   Brian shares, “Victor Frankl, who wrote 'Man’s Search for Meaning'. You can choose your attitude no matter your circumstances, and each person has the internal power to find inner meaning in any situation. He gave me perspective on how much I was self-pitying. I decided how I was going to face how I was going to feel and how I was going to choose to think.”   On the podcast, Brian discusses the concept of Hacking your Resiliency. Take a listen to the podcast to hear these valuable insights.   Brian leaves us with a challenge to consider, “Whenever a problem shows up one question you can ask yourself is, ‘What’s good about this?’ When you ask this question you immediately begin seeing what opportunities are available to you because that problem exists.   A big thank you to Brian for joining me on the podcast and sharing his insights! You can learn how to connect with Brian in the resources section below.       Love & Respect, Eric Goll         Resources:   Brian's Website: Mindsetbeforeskillset.com Connect with Brian on Facebook         If you received value from this content please leave me a review on iTunes. By leaving a 5 star review on iTunes you make the Empowering Ability Podcast more discoverable, and more families will benefit. Click Here To Leave a Review on iTunes       The Empowering Ability Podcast is available on iTunes and various other apps so that you can listen while on the go from your smartphone!   Click Here To Listen on iTunes

Guest Lynne Seagle shares how her organizaton was oppressing people with disabilities, and what they did about it.   This week’s guest is Lynne Seagle, CEO of Hope House Foundation, a not-for-profit organization started in 1964 by family members whom had sons and daughters with developmental disabilities in Virginia, USA. These families wanted something other than an institutional living for their loved ones, so they started the first group home in the state of Virginia. Hope house grew to run 13 group homes by the 1980’s, when they learned that the people living there actually didn’t want to live in group homes, and they did something about it. Today, Hope House supports 125 people that live in their own home, with a staff of about 260 people, half of those being part-time.   Lynne has been with Hope House for 38 years. She wants to create a better world for people with disabilities that are isolated or not valued, and she said, “there is no stopping point – it is a long journey”.     Finding Out People Didn’t want to Live in Group Homes   Paraphrasing from the podcast Lynne shares that, “…finding out people didn’t want to live in group homes started with a survey. The survey asked the question, ‘Does everyone like where they are living?’ Everyone said yes. It was odd to ask 120 some folks a personal question and get the same answer. We then re-worded the question to, ‘How do you want to live?’. And, the flood gates opened. People answered 1 of 3 ways, from most dominant to least; 1) I want a home of my own, 2) people wanted a job (most people were in day programs or workshops), 3) friendship and romance.   Lynne continues, “We [Hope House] had defined excellence as meeting all the rules – paperwork was clean, no employee grievances, well-kept homes, low staff turnover. We were looked at as the model in Virginia. BUT, when we gathered these themes [truths] we reviewed our program plans and not one program plan addressed these needs of people. This was a daunting realization for our organization.”       People Were Being Oppressed in Group Homes   Lynne Shares, “We started meeting people individually and we started realizing we didn’t know them. When you support someone in a group you only know them in the context of the group, not really an individual. It was quite astonishing to us. After we closed the first group home we started to study oppression (groups that have been oppressed); American Indians, women, people of color, the LGBT community. The book ‘Walking with the Wind’ by John Lewis was influential for us. We noticed all oppression looks the same, regardless of the group – keeping people poor, limitation of choice, very few freedoms.”   Hope House had discovered this truth that they were oppressing the very people they were there to serve, and they made a decision to no longer run group homes. The last of the 13 group homes closed 22 years ago, and everyone they support now has a home of their own.   Lynne shares, “[Hope House is] proud of this, but I’m surprised that this is still something to talk about as something new or something that should be considered in 2018.”     It was just the right thing to do.   At the time there were no examples on how to do this, and funding was set up in a group model. This was the hard road to choose. Lynne shares, what kept them moving forward is asking the question, “Why do people in disabilities need to live in groups when I don’t have to? We looked at the humanity of it, not the money, or the skill of the person.”     We are Responsible for the Oppression of People with Disabilities.   Paraphrasing from the podcast, Lynne shares, “What business looks exactly as it did in the 1970’s and has consistent oppression? When you look at social justice change in almost every case the people being led it were the people being suppressed. When you look at the nature of developmental disability, the people being oppressed need our support to lead a revolution, and we would be revolting against ourselves. We need to step up! Do we want neighborhoods that are being inclusive or not? There is a huge group that is being left out.”   Insight from Lynne: “We need to change, not people with disabilities that need to change.”     How Do We Bring People Out of Oppression?   Lynne shares, “What we did is gave everyone a home of their own. No one wanted a roommate, except for people that were romantically involved. This gave people a lot of control. We chronically underestimate people with disabilities. When given the opportunity a lot of people with disabilities flew. After that, a focus on employment. Economic power opens up more choice.  Then we focused on connection and belonging. Not having a service life, but having your life.     Reconciling our Beliefs   Paraphrasing from the podcast Lynne Shares, “We had a prejudice or bigotry. When you value intellect and beauty …. people with disabilities don’t fit those values. When you lift that up you realize that you don’t believe that people with disabilities are your equal. We had to come to terms with that. That was internal work that everyone of us had to do. We believed the level of disability related to how much you could direct your life. We had to get rid of that stereotype. We support people that are non-verbal, that use a variety of devices [to live in their own home].  We now have a belief to the core that every single human being can direct their own life. When people are in their own homes they are looked at differently. The universe has its own way, without us controlling us. The natural rhythms of life start to happen then people have their own homes.”       Lynne shares the story of Willy and how he proved them wrong in his capability to direct his own life. Hope House went from providing $160,000/ year of support to $10,000 per year in support as Willy got his own place and started to flourish.   We are Oppressing People with Disabilities   Upon my reflections, we are oppressing people that are living in grouped settings, but people don’t have to be living in an institution or group home to be oppressed. People with disabilities are being oppressed by their families, their friends, their supporters and by society at large. Lynne shares with us the common signs of oppression; keeping people poor, limitation of choice, very few freedoms.   When I examine my own life, I’ve been guilty of keeping people oppressed. For example, I’ve played a part in keeping my sister (who has a disability) poor by not getting her access to her bank account and helping her learn her economic power, by limiting her choice or taking decision making power away from her, and by not acting to get her out of isolation at my parents home.   There are very simple steps I’m taking to empower my sister, like getting her a bank card and assisting her with online banking, by standing beside her to play a supportive role in making decisions, and creating and upholding a big bold vision for her to move out of my parents’ home and into a home of her own.    Once I became conscious to my beliefs, and how I was being oppressive to others I had to make a choice. I could choose to continue to suppress these truths and continue on with the status quo, or I could roll up my sleeves and do the hard work of examining my beliefs and change my beliefs to put people with disabilities on equal footing and to support them in breaking free of oppression. I chose the later, which will you choose?   Lynne leaves us with this message, “It is all of our responsibilities to work on ourselves around the issue of equality, regardless of disability, and to take action for those left on the sidelines."       Love & Respect, Eric Goll         Resources:   Hope House Website: https://www.hope-house.org/         If you received value from this content please leave me a review on iTunes. By leaving a 5 star review on iTunes you make the Empowering Ability Podcast more discoverable, and more families will benefit. Click Here To Leave a Review on iTunes       The Empowering Ability Podcast is available on iTunes and various other apps so that you can listen while on the go from your smartphone!   Click Here To Listen on iTunes  

Guest Joscelyn Duffy shares her strategies of resiliency through her recovery from a life threatening illness, & we discuss how to be a compassionate supporter. Joscelyn Duffy is a communication and contribution strategist who travels the world serving leaders in the development of their messages, model and methodologies. At the young age of 26, Joscelyn went from high potential employee in the financial sector and marathon runner to being bed ridden for 2 years with a life threatening case of lupus. During these two years Joscelyn slowly recovered but was only left with 2 to 3 good hours per day. Joscelyn shares, “This was a shock and massive unexpected shift in my life.” Joscelyn found that she had to make the best of her 2 to 3 hours, especially compared to when she had 16. She was left asking herself, “How do I push through with mental fortitude?”   Paraphrasing from the podcast Joscelyn shares, “When my illness happened I wanted to hold onto the way life was and went right back to work from bed.” She found that she couldn’t do what she was once able to do. She said to herself, “If I am listening to life I’ve got to get over what my head is telling me, and there is something else I could be doing.”   This new thinking led to acceptance of her current situation, and a focus on what mattered most to her – being active with other people, and engaging in her passions; reading, writing, and painting. There was a lot of healing that came through writing a book on her story titled, “Unshakable to the Core.” This led to Joscelyn’s current career as a ghost writer, helping other people to have their voice heard.     Joscelyn’s Insights on Resiliency:   For Joscelyn, it was simple; compassion and small actions.   Simply have compassion for yourself. Small action; It is going to take small steps to get to where you want to go. When Joscelyn was learning where to walk, she had to start with the first couple of steps. Every step is like going up a staircase toward your ultimate goal.       How can we support someone that is experiencing a challenge?   “If you want to make god laugh, you tell him your plans.” – Woody Allen.   Paraphrasing from the podcast Joscelyn Shares, “Life rarely ever goes the way we plan it. We take ourselves way to seriously. We can take a light-heart into these situations as a supporter. Try to encourage flexibility.  Especially when you are working with a person that has to do something a certain way, ask them to just try it once.”         Empathy Vs. Compassion   Something I have personally been struggling with is being empathetic of people I am supporting, rather than being compassionate.   So, why is this a problem?   Being empathetic is feeling and taking on what someone else is feeling or walking in their shoes. Or, as Joscelyn defines it, feeling the pain of another.   Vs   Being compassionate is understanding what someone is going through, but not taking on their emotions.  Or as Joscelyn defines it, wanting help to alleviate the pain and suffering of others.   The challenge with being empathetic is that our ability to be helpful is at risk of being diminished by taking on the emotions of others, where as being compassionate allows us to stay grounded in our own perspective and to support the person to move forward.     The Compassionate Supporter is a More Effective, and Happier Supporter.   In 2016, Michael Poulin and associates at State University of New York at Buffalo conducted a study to see the impacts of taking two different perspectives as a supporter; a helping imagine-self perspective taking (ISPT) (i.e. walking in their shoes perspective), and an imagine-other perspective taking (IOPT) (i.e. seeing through their eyes perspective).   The study found that ISPT resulted in relative threat, whereas IOPT resulted in marginally greater relative challenge. This effect was mediated by increased perceived demands of the situation. Moreover, self-reported distress was only associated with threat during ISPT, but not during IOPT.   Source: https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0022103116303961?via=ihub     So, what does this mean?   When we walk in another's shoes as a supporter, we take on threat and our stress levels increase. When we look through the other person’s eyes there is only a small impact on us - less stress. This study tells us that we can be a more effective supporter by being compassionate vs empathetic.         Putting Compassion into Practice:   Putting compassion into practice is something I am working to develop myself. Joscelyn offered a practical model, ‘The 4 P’s of Compassion’, to understand compassion that I found very insightful, as well as a couple of tools we can use to practice being compassionate.         "The 4 P's of Compassion"   Presence: Being there fully the moment with the person   Perspective taking: Seeing the world through their eyes, without fully stepping into their shoes   Patience:  Being patient with yourself and those you serve.   Progress: support for forward progress – the small steps also count.       Tools to Practice Compassion:   Being compassionate is about perspective taking. As stated in Michael Poulin’s study, it is more beneficial to try and see things through another person’s eyes, rather than trying to walk their shoes. When we look through another’s eyes and stay grounded in our own two shoes as the supporter we have decreased stress, and increased health and wellbeing.   We aren’t helping others when we are taking on what they have.   Sounds great! How do we do this?   Joscelyn shares, “You can think about it like watching a movie. When watch a movie you might laugh, smile, or cry, but when the movie is over you haven’t taken that on (i.e. those emotions don’t continue to impact you). You have learned from it, you are better for it because now you see a different perspective, but you don’t internalize it. It is a dance.”   Joscelyn is also a Reiki practitioner, and she had to learn how to stay in own her own strength and energy. She shares a strategy that she uses, “I see my favorite colour around me (picture being in a bubble of colour), and positive energy can come in, and the negative energy can’t penetrate this shield. This allows us to stay in our own energy while supporting another."     On the podcast, Joscelyn also shares how to find your own voice, which is something Joscelyn has a great deal of experience supporting others to do as a ghost writer.   A big thank you to Joscelyn for sharing her story and insights on resiliency and compassion!         Love & Respect, Eric Goll         Resources:   Joscelyn’s Website: Joscelynduffy.com   Joscelyn’s Books: Click Here   Joscelyn’s Blog: Click Here   Read more on perspective taking: Click Here      If you received value from this content please leave me a review on iTunes. By leaving a 5 star review on iTunes you make the Empowering Ability Podcast more discoverable, and more families will benefit. Click Here To Leave a Review on iTunes       The Empowering Ability Podcast is available on iTunes and various other apps so that you can listen while on the go from your smartphone!   Click Here To Listen on iTunes

Guest Nick Maisey, founder of Befriend, shares his insights on building relationships and creating more inclusive cultures. Nick is an Occupational Therapist, social entrepreneur and community builder from Perth, Australia. With the support of the Westpac Bicentennial Foundation, Nick completed a Social Change Fellowship to undertake an international information exchange, to enhance his learning of innovative, effective approaches to fostering the development of relationships and community connections.   Nick spends a lot of his time reflecting on the importance of relationships, and thinking about what we can do together to build more connected societies.  This curiosity is what led Nick to start the organization, Befriend. The inspiration to start Befriend came when Nick was studying Occupational Therapy. The story goes, Nick received an email from Tim, that roughly read, “I am a 23-year-old guy, I like watching movies, going to the beach, and learning how to surf. I don’t have any friends, I am wondering if there is anyone interested in getting to know me?” Nick shares, “There was something simple and honest about his email. I met him (Tim)…  he has taught me a lot about inclusion, and what it is like to live a meaningful life connected to others. He didn’t have a single person that he would call a friend. It struck me that we live amongst so many people in close proximity of each other, but there are so many people that feel alone.” This started a lot of conversations between Nick and his friends, and in 2010 Befriend was started with the intention to foster a more inclusive and connected society. Nick Shares, “The experience of loneliness for many of us comes from the feeling of being excluded.  With Befriend we foster the development of new relationships, and a more inclusive culture.”     How is Befriend doing this? Paraphrasing from the podcast Nick shares, “It is about simplicity. We take a community building approach by working with local people that are interested in building community, and we work with them to bring people together. We partner with organizations and networks where people are vulnerable, and we facilitate introductions and connections. In partnership with community organizations we help to get the word out about these gatherings, and build bridges to vulnerable people. In Perth, we have about 50 social gatherings per month across the city. Befriend is kind of like a Meet up, which is platform for any individual that can start up a group around an interest, but with an intentional value of inclusion. Befriend focuses on teaching gathering hosts on how to cultivate inclusive cultures.     Reducing Loneliness and Isolation in Community: In 2017, Nick was awarded a Social Change Fellowship from Westpac Bank’s Bicentennial Foundation to go on a self-development experience to further his social change venture.  This was essentially a scholarship for a 3-month international self-directed learning tour that took Nick around the world and back, including stops in; Australia, New Zealand, United States, Canada, Scotland, England, and Denmark.   On Nick’s journey he visited 58 groups to explore his curiosity in these two key areas:   1. What are effective approaches for fostering the development of natural relationships for people who have had a lived experience of being isolated, disconnected, or devalued within their community?   2. What are approaches for fostering more inclusive behaviours, attitudes and values within communities?   On the podcast, Nick shares the stories of his visits to a few of these 58 groups, and what he learned with them. Nick and I also discuss the traits we see in people excelling in the ‘community builder’ role. Take a listen to the podcast to hear these insights.   The Space In-between:  Nick came to be very interested in the space in between his two key questions: that is, what are people doing to build natural relationships for devalued people, and to foster more inclusive cultures? A theme started to emerge – valued contributions. Nick noticed that when people devalued by their community made a contribution that they were intrinsically motivated to give they started to build natural relationships, and more inclusive cultures emerged. Some examples in practice where Nick observed this were volunteer time banking initiatives, skill exchanges, community dinners, interfaith initiatives (sharing knowledge and beliefs about god across religions to enrich collective sense of faith), and neighbourhood development projects.    Nick leaves us with this call to action to build relationships and create more inclusive cultures:   “Spend time thinking about, not what we need, or others around us need. But, how can we be helpful? And, how can others around us be people be helpful? Especially (use this thinking for) the people we think of living a life of needs.”     Love & Respect, Eric Goll         Resources: Nick's Blog: Click Here  Befriend website: Click Here Befriend Facebook page: Click Here     If you received value from this content please leave me a review on iTunes. By leaving a 5 star review on iTunes you make the Empowering Ability Podcast more discoverable, and more families will benefit. Click Here To Leave a Review on iTunes       The Empowering Ability Podcast is available on iTunes and various other apps so that you can listen while on the go from your smartphone!   Click Here To Listen on iTunes

Welcome to Episode #042 of the Empowering Ability Podcast/ Blog. Today’s episode is about ‘Understanding the Sibling Experience, with Helen Ries.’ Before we get into the content of this episode, first some housekeeping because it has been awhile since you have heard from me.   Almost 4 months in fact.   In December 2017, I shared with you that the podcast would be taking a break for a couple of months so that I could develop new content and complete a few projects. However, life got busier than expected; with helping to run my family’s business, finishing the construction of my new house, supporting my sister to move out of my parent’s house, running my coaching practice for leaders and families working to create incredible ordinary lives for people with disabilities, and working on the adult sibling research we are going to share with you today.   Something had to give, and it was the podcast - even though I love podcasting. To give you an idea, publishing a 1- hour episode is about 10 hours of work, as I do all the recording, editing, writing, graphics, and publishing myself. So, moving forward I will be releasing an episode every 2 weeks, which is a much more manageable pace than weekly, also considering this podcast is currently free. I am a considering a ‘pay what you can model’ for those of you that are getting a ton of value from this podcast and wish to contribute to the production of the podcasts and the costs associated with it. I want this information to remain open and widely available to everyone, and this type of model will enable that. With all of that said, I have still been recording content over the last 4 months and I have some incredible conversations that I will be bringing to you over the next couple of months.   I’d love to hear from some of you to learn what has really resonated with you over the first 42 episodes. This will help me as I craft new content to bring you more of what you find valuable. Also, send me the names of guests you would love to hear on the podcast. You can send me an email at eric@ericgoll.com.   Okay, enough housekeeping.     Today, my guest today is Helen Ries. Helen is a sibling, who supports her brother Paul, and they live together in Ottawa, Ontario. Helen also joined me on episode 9, which you can listen to here, where she talks in depth about her experience as a sibling and shares her insights. Helen is also an evaluator and consultant in the not-for-profit sector with an interest in social justice and poverty reduction, you can check out her work on her website.   Helen and I, discuss the research we have been doing to understand the life experience of adult siblings. The purpose of this research is to understand siblings so that we can better support adult siblings with resources, some of which we intend to create.   There were actually three of us completing this research, the third person being Becky Rossi. Becky just became the mother to her 3rd child, and wasn’t able to join us on the podcast – but here is a brief overview of our stories:   Helen’s Story: All her life Helen knew that one day she would be responsible for her brother’s care. When that day arrived, it was early, unexpected and fast. The shock of suddenly becoming a caregiver still runs through her. There are moments when she remembers a time when she could go away for the weekend without planning it or when she didn’t have the nag of constant worry. It has been so far a difficult journey, but she is very proud of how her brother has thrived with her care and how their relationship has grown.   Becky’s Story: Becky has spent the last seven years championing broad systems change through building community-based, non-traditional solutions to issues of isolation and vulnerability, both through her long-time work with P4P and as the sibling of an adult brother with Asperger’s Syndrome. Becky has a close relationship with her brother and – together with her sister and parents – they navigate the challenges and opportunities of creating a meaningful life, secure future and strong family.   Eric’s Story: Sitting from his work desk Eric received a call from his distressed mother exclaiming "I just can't do it anymore". She was referring to caring for his sister, with a DD, 31 years old at the time. Eric had a decision to make – continue to stay arm’s length from his family, or jump in and play the role of a loving brother and loving son that he knew he could be. This started Eric's journey in supporting families with a loved one with a DD (including his own), through personal coaching and educating.   So, this is a big lead up to what we have learned, here it is….     The Sibling Life Journey   We looked at the common themes in the life of a sibling over the stages of a sibling’s life. These themes might not apply to every sibling’s life, but these are our observations from conversation with many adult siblings, and they line up well with the data we collected in a survey with over 360 adult sibling respondents.   0 years-18 years old: At a young age we get an understanding of disability, and we notice differences between ourselves and our sibling. Our parents are taking our brother or sister to many appointments and are often providing much more care to our brother or sister than they are for us. We are often asked to help out, and many of us just jump in wanting to help. This leads to siblings maturing faster than normal and developing a strong sense for caring for others at an early age. We also become our brother or sister’s protector. No one is going to mess with our brother or sister at school, or out in public without hearing about it from us. The maturity, carer, and protector are traits and values that we often carry with us throughout our lives.   18 years – 29 years old: At 18 typically siblings move out and go through a big growth and exploration phase. We get an advanced education, or head out into the working world, we try many jobs to see what we like, we travel. And our brother or sister, from age 21 on, is often living at our parents’ home with little to do and is actually in decline in terms of growth. During this time in a sibling’s life they will often describe having a feeling of guilt, as they are experiencing what life has to offer, and their brother or sister isn’t having the same opportunity. Siblings want their brother or sister to have the same life opportunities, but they don’t know how to support them to do so.   30 years – 39 years old: This stage of a sibling’s life is typically focused on career building and starting a family of their own. These things take a lot of energy and can mean a little less connection with our brother or sister and parents. This feeling of guilt can continue. We want better for our brother or sister but not really knowing how to help and use our influence. Siblings are often pushed out of the conversation my parents about their brother or sister because parents don’t want that ‘burden’ to be passed onto the other sibling.   40 years – 49 years old: Siblings have described having a ‘looming’ feeling in this life stage. More often than not, their brother or sister with a disability is still living with their parents, and the parent’s health is starting to decline due to age. Siblings can see this impending crisis coming, whether it is conscious or unconscious - it is keeping them up at night. What is going to happen when my parents can’t support my brother and sister? It is on me.   50+ years old: The parents decline to a point where they cannot provide care for their child with a disability, and someone else needs to take over that role. Many siblings step up to fill the role, all while dealing with their parents decline, their career, and their family. This can be a very challenging time period in a sibling’s life.       The Survey Findings:   There are 7 key findings that we share in the ‘Understanding the Sibling Experience’ report, here is a small glimpse into a couple of the findings that Helen and I discuss on the podcast. I recommend you check out the report, hosted by Partners For Planning (P4P), if you are interested in reading about all of the findings.   The Findings:   Where are our brothers and sisters with a disability living? Well it turns out that 85.6% of our brothers and sisters aged 20 to 29 years old are living with their parents. In comparison, the Canadian national average is 34.7% for people aged 20-29 years old. The percentage of people with disabilities living with their parents stays high well into the 40-49 year old age bracket, at 58.5%.   What are the current challenges identified by siblings? Siblings identified the mental health of their brother or sister and the mental health of their parents as the most frequent challenge they face. Followed by hosing options for their brother or sister, managing relationships, and emotional supports for themselves.   If you are interested in the other 5 findings, check out the report here.         Our Recommendations:   In our report, we outline 8 recommendations for siblings, families, organizations, and government to consider.   These recommendations include:   A deeper study of siblings Adult siblings connect with other adult siblings to share their experiences Development of resources and tools for adult siblings Support for mental health of our families Innovative housing solutions Poverty reduction Siblings are involved in the family planning discussions Organizations reach out to siblings and support them.   I encourage you to read our report to learn more about these recommendations in depth, click here.       The Sibling Collaborative:   So, what is next for us? (Helen, Becky, and I)   We have done a lot of thinking about what we have learned about siblings and we have created a new project, called ‘The Sibling Collaborative’ to support siblings needs.   The purpose of the Sibling Collaborative is to ‘Connect Siblings and Strengthen Families’.     The Sibling Collaborative has a core set of values that guides our work:   Realizing Change with Compassion: We take action with the critical input and consideration of our brothers and sisters with a DD and our families.   Mutual Respect: We give people agency over their own lives, with consideration for all those involved.   Collective Solutions: We find a way forward by learning, working and co-creating together.   Unlocking Potential: We hold a big and bold vision for our brothers and sisters as well as our families. Our intrinsic creativity and resourcefulness knows no limit.   For this collaborative to be a collaborative we need others to collaborate with! We would love other siblings, self-advocates, family members, and organizations that share these values to partner with us on this journey. You can join the sibling collective mailing list here, to be updated on the journey as it unfolds.   Helen leaves us with a quote from friend to all siblings, Don Meyer, “If you want to invest in the long-term well-being of people with developmental disabilities, you need to invest in their brothers and sisters.”   Thank you for reading to today's blog! If you liked this episode, and think someone you know would benefit, please share it with them! Be a part of the change to think differently about disability.     Love & Respect, Eric Goll         Resources:   The Sibling Collaborative Facebook Page: Click Here: Sibling Network   Join The Sibling Collaborative Mailing List: Click Here   Email: info@siblingcollaborative.org   Understanding the Sibling Experience Report: Click Here       If you received value from this content please leave me a review on iTunes. By leaving a 5 star review on iTunes you make the Empowering Ability Podcast more discoverable, and more families will benefit. Click Here To Leave a Review on iTunes       The Empowering Ability Podcast is available on iTunes and various other apps so that you can listen while on the go from your smartphone!   Click Here To Listen on iTunes            Tags: Helen Ries Siblings Becky Rossi Sibling Life Journey sibling care-giving Sibling report The Sibling Collaborative

Al Condeluci provides us with a 4-stage framework to build social capital (meaningful relationships) for people with disabilities. Keenan Wellar also joins us to share the experience of putting the framework into action with his team at LiveWorkPlay. This podcast was created from a segment in Episode 006, so it might be the second listen for you long time listeners, but it is so good that it is worth another listen!   The approach that Al Condeluci shares is a 180-degree approach from looking at a person’s deficits. “Oh, Sarah can’t do that…. She would never be able to (fill in the blank).” This approach zooms out and looks at the much bigger view (macro view as Al calls it) of a person’s life.     In an ongoing study, by Harvard University, it was revealed that relationships are the biggest contributor to our happiness:   “Close relationships, more than money or fame, are what keep people happy throughout their lives, the study revealed. Those ties protect people from life’s discontents, help to delay mental and physical decline, and are better predictors of long and happy lives than social class, IQ, or even genes. That finding proved true across the board among both the Harvard men and the inner-city participants.” Link to article.     In conversation with Al Condeluci, he explained to me that the average person maintains approximately 150 social connections [The Rule of 150] , however the research is starting to  show that people with disabilities only maintain on average 25 connections. More to come on this in future episodes!     So how do we improve a person’s social capital?       4-Stage Framework for Building Social Capital:   On the podcast, Al Condeluci shares:   1) Understand the person’s affinities and passions. This requires a cultural shift from deficits (what a person cannot do) to a profile of assets.   2) Where do these affinities and passions happen in the community? For every interest, there is a group of people in the community that enjoy those interests. Find where these interests exist in the community. This is where people will gather around an interest, and creates similarity, rather than difference. This forms a connection point.   3) Learn what is expected of people when they look to join the group or community. Once you have an understanding of the expectations of a person in these settings you can then coach and prepare the person you are supporting to understand what those expected behaviours.   4) Find the gate keeper. This is someone that is already a part of the community that can help to facilitate relationships with others.   (More detail on this framework is provided in the podcast, and in Al’s book 'Social Capital: The Key to Macro Change')       Building Social Capital in Action:   Keenan Wellar, Co-Leader of LiveWorkPlay, leads the organization to implement Al’s 4-stage framework for their clients. Keenan shares that taking this approach is a lot of hard work, and takes some figuring out. They don’t always get it right the first time.   Keenan shares the story of Chris, a young man with an intellectual disability, who is a soccer player and his current team wasn’t working out. The LiveWorkPlay team worked with Chris to find him a new team that would be inclusive and accepting of what Chris brought to the team. They met with Chris’s new team to educate them on being inclusive, however, the team said this is who we are – we are accepting of everyone.   Chris went to his soccer game, and it was overlooked that he didn’t have a ride home. The next morning the LiveWorkPlay team was in a panic to learn that Chris was invited to go out for beers with the team after the game, and someone drove Chris home. Chris didn’t get invited out for beers and driven home because he had a disability, it was because he is a part of the team. A huge thank you goes out to Al & Keenan for the work that they do to improve social capital for people with disabilities!   Thank you for reading to today's blog! If you liked this episode, and think someone you know would benefit, please share it with them! Be a part of the change to think differently about disability.     Love & Respect, Eric Goll         Resources:   How to contact Al Condeluci:   Website: http://www.alcondeluci.com/ Contact: http://www.alcondeluci.com/contact/ Location: Pittsburg PA, USA     How to contact Keenan & the LiveWorkPlay team:   Website: http://liveworkplay.ca/ Website: https://keenanwellar.wordpress.com/ Contact: http://liveworkplay.ca/contact-us/ Phone: 613-702-0332 Location: Ottawa, Ontario, Canada     If you received value from this content please leave me a review on iTunes. By leaving a 5 star review on iTunes you make the Empowering Ability Podcast more discoverable, and more families will benefit. Click Here To Leave a Review on iTunes       The Empowering Ability Podcast is available on iTunes and various other apps so that you can listen while on the go from your smartphone!   Click Here To Listen on iTunes

Dr. Jen created the The Umbrella Project which embodies the idea of using challenges life throws at us as an opportunity to learn new skills and cope.   In this week’s episode of the Empowering Ability podcast, I had the pleasure of chatting with good friend, Dr. Jennifer Forristal (aka Dr. Jen). Dr. Jen helps us to understand the approach a Naturopathic Doctor (N.D) takes with a patient, educates us on gluten/dairy/ egg free diets, shares common questions and answers from the developmental disability community, and she shares her amazing work with The Umbrella Project.   Let it rain – The Umbrella Project   One of my favorite quotes is:   “Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass. It's about learning how to dance in the rain.” —Vivian Greene.   Dr. Jen has created the The Umbrella Project which embodies the idea of using the challenges that life throws at us as an opportunity to learn new skills, and develop our ability to cope.      Dr. Jen, Founder of the project, shares, “The Umbrella Project is a paradigm that I have built to help people better understand the world of coping, positive phycology, and all of the skills that we use to have better wellbeing.  The skills like self-compassion, resilience, mindfulness, and purpose have same research outcomes; they help us take on life and thrive no matter what is happening to us. I call it The Umbrella Project because I think about the stresses of life like rain, they are inevitable and we try to avoid them, but we are not going to. It is better for us to think about how to prepare for those days than it is to try and eliminate those days from our lives. We take the stress and the challenges of life and use it as a tool to build coping skills – what we call umbrella skills. I’ve built The Umbrella Project to do this, and we have brought it into schools to teach kids, and we are now educating parents as well.”       How Does The Umbrella Project Teach Kids?   Paraphrasing from the podcast Dr. Jen Shares:   We share the language, and help kids understand what the skill is.  We show kids the outcomes of those skills and tell them the research. It is amazing what kids can absorb! We help them go into the world and see these skills in action. For example, when you see someone being resilient it makes you more resilient yourself.   On the podcast, Dr. Jen shares how they are teaching parents these skills.       What Does a Naturopathic Doctor Offer?   Paraphrasing from the podcast Dr. Jen Shares:   Naturopathic doctors (N.D.s) are primary care providers in Ontario. N.D.s have the same training same as a medical doctor for first 2 years including; diagnostics, blood work, etc.. Where we branch off is that we use more natural styles of treatment such as, exercising, eating better, taking the right supplements, stress reduction. There is so much research on how these interventions are effective at treating many different conditions.   Naturopaths work to understand the cause of what is going on, rather than just focusing on symptoms. A N.D. spends a lot more time with a patient, and we work toward bringing that person to an optimal state of wellbeing. For example, if someone had a skin condition we would look at things like what is going on with their gut health, not just put a cream on the rash. OR if someone was experiencing anxiety we would spend a lot of time looking at the lifestyle things that would help them come out of that state of anxiety and address the underlying things, rather than just give them a medication to alleviate the symptom of anxiety.       Gluten / Dairy Free Diets:   Paraphrasing from the podcast, Dr. Jen shares:   There isn’t a cookie cutter approach, and recommendations are always individualized. The research shows a certain percentage of the population responds really well to gluten free & dairy free diets. Eggs come up often as well. It is worth trying this type of diet and seeing if it works for you. You can start to see evidence of positive changes in as little as 1 to 2 weeks. It isn’t something that you have to commit to for a life time. Look for noticeable changes, you might not see the full impact of the changes, but you can start to see results. There is often gut symptom that comes up from eating these foods, and it is easy to see changes in these symptoms.     Are There Common Questions You Get from the Developmental Disability Community?   Paraphrasing from the podcast, Dr. Jen shares:   Often, when I see these families biggest thing that I see is that parents get very tired and burnt out. The parent brings in the child, and focus shifts to the parent. We discuss getting better balance in their life. If the parents are healthy then it seems to trickle down to the rest of the family.   When it comes to kids, sleep is a big thing. If one person isn’t sleeping then the whole family can be impacted.     On the podcast, Dr. Jen also discusses the importance of sleep, and provides sleep tips. She also shares how to find the best N.D. for you.   A huge thank you to Dr. Jen for coming on to the podcast and sharing her amazing work. If you are interested in learning more about The Umbrella Project, Dr. Jen would love to talk with you about it.   Thank you for reading to today's blog! If you liked this episode, and think someone you know would benefit, please share it with them! Be a part of the change to think differently about disability.   Love & Respect, Eric         Resources:   The Umbrella Project Curriculum and Newsletter: Click Here.    Email: Drjen@umbrellaproject.co       If you received value from this content please leave me a review on iTunes. By leaving a 5 star review on iTunes you make the Empowering Ability Podcast more discoverable, and more families will benefit. Click Here To Leave a Review on iTunes       The Empowering Ability Podcast is available on iTunes and various other apps so that you can listen while on the go from your smartphone!   Click Here To Listen on iTunes

Don is one of the world’s leading experts on siblings, and has supported siblings for the last 35 years. Don Meyer, Director of the Sibling Support Project.  The Sibling Support Project is a national program in the United States, with international presence, dedicated to the millions of brothers and sisters of people with developmental disabilities. The program is supported by Washington state’s largest early intervention center, the Kindering Center.   Why Are Brothers and Sisters So Important?   Paraphrasing from the podcast, Don Shares:   Anything we can say about being a parent, we can put ditto marks underneath for siblings. The research says siblings have parallel experiences to their parents. But, when we look at the services, and considerations that siblings get - siblings get the short end of the stick. In the USA, there are 200-300 people that have full-time jobs to support parents, there is 1 person with a full-time job supporting siblings (and that is Don). Brothers and sisters have the longest lasting relationship with a person that has a developmental disability. This relationship is lifelong. When mom and dad are no longer available the brother and sister’s will make sure their sibling will live a dignified life in the community. No one logs on more moments and minutes with their brother or sister. No one has a greater impact on the social development of a person with a developmental disability.     Why Are Siblings Underserved?   Paraphrasing from the podcast, Don Shares:   Siblings are off the organization’s radar screens because they not squeaky wheels. As siblings outlive their parents service providers are beginning to realize there are these brothers and sisters out there.   If you want to ensure a good long-term outcome for people with disabilities then invest in their siblings because they are going to be there in the long haul.   There is reason to believe that intervening with siblings, even young siblings, has a benefit to everyone.       How Can Service Providers Invest In Siblings?   Paraphrasing from the podcast, Don Shares:   Service providers can create initiatives that specifically reach out to brothers and sisters, and they can change their policy to explicitly invite brothers and sisters.   Provide siblings information that they think is important. Brothers and sisters have a lifelong need for information. This is a parallel that siblings share with parents.   How do siblings get their information? They are lucky if they get it from their parents. Educational materials need to be prepared specifically for siblings.     Sibshops   Don goes around the world and shows people how to start Sibshops; peer support and education programs for school aged siblings that have a brother or sister with a developmental disabilities. There are 350 Sibshops worldwide, including in the USA (250), Canada (30), Iceland, Ireland, and Japan. Sibshops got their start in 1982, and Don has been training people on how to run Sibshops since 1990. The typical Sibshop age spread is 8-13 years old. This age spread is tweaked all the time – sometimes as low as 6 years old, and some organizations even have teen Sibshops.   One of the biggest benefits of Sibshops that Don has observed is the peer to peer support and connection with other kids that are walking down a similar path. Don has met many siblings that don’t talk to another sibling until they are in their 40’s! It is unheard of for a parent to wait 40 years before meeting another parent with a child that had a developmental disability. But, this is the reality with siblings. (In my own experience, I didn’t connect with another sibling until I was in my late 20’s. Also, I recently facilitated an adult sibling meeting and it was the first time 30% of  the group had ever connected with another sibling.)   Don shares, “We are giving young siblings a chance to meet young siblings, learn about the services their brothers and sisters are getting, and to learn how others are dealing with sticky situations. We have designed Sibshops to be fun, because they are for kids. We have a celebration of contributions made by brothers and sisters, and we mix content activities with recreational activities.”     The University of Washington has researched the effectiveness of Sibshops and found: Over 90% of respondents said they had a positive effect on how they felt about brother or sister. 2/3 of respondents were taught coping strategies. 94% said they would recommend Sibshops to others. 3/4 of respondents said Sibshops impacted their adult lives.   Don Shares, “(The value of Sibshops is…) to be in the community of people who get it. To vent in a non-judgmental forum, to know you are not alone, and learn about resources and strategies.”     On the podcast, Don shares the unique concerns and opportunities that he has observed after interacting with 1000’s of siblings around the world. The list includes concerns like guilt and embarrassment, but also includes opportunities like maturity and diversity. I recommend you take a listen to the podcast to hear all of Don’s insights.   This podcast is packed full of resources for siblings, which are all listed below in the resource section.   A big thank you goes out to Don for joining us on the podcast and sharing his work and insights on siblings!     Thank you for reading to today's blog! If you liked this episode, and think someone you know would benefit, please share it with them! Be a part of the change to think differently about disability.     Love & Respect, Eric         Resources:   Social Networking Groups for Siblings: Sibnet Adults Click Here Sib Teen Click Here     Sibshop curriculum Click Here The Sibling Survival Guide, created with Sibling Leadership Network. Click Here The Sibling Slam Book – by teen sibs for teen sibs. Click Here Views From Our Shoes – collection of essays from young siblings. Click Here Thicker Than Water – collection of essay from adult siblings Click Here   Being the Other One, by Kate Strohm Click Here Riding The Bus with My Sister, by Rachel Simon Click Here Special Siblings, by Mary McHugh Click Here   Paper: What siblings would like parents and services providers to know. Click Here      Contact Don Email: info@siblingsupport.org Phone: 206-297-6368     If you received value from this content please leave me a review on iTunes. By leaving a 5 star review on iTunes you make the Empowering Ability Podcast more discoverable, and more families will benefit. Click Here To Leave a Review on iTunes       The Empowering Ability Podcast is available on iTunes and various other apps so that you can listen while on the go from your smartphone!   Click Here To Listen on iTunes

In this week’s episode on the Empowering Ability Podcast we welcome guest Dr. Annick Janson, whom resides in NZ. Dr. Annick Janson is a clinical phycologist, and a mother of 3 children. Her youngest child, Yaniv, is on the spectrum, and life changed quite a bit when he came into their lives. Annick carries the deep personal experiences of being both a family member and a service professional.   As a professional, clinical phycologist, Annick followed a typical pathway, and became dissatisfied with the outcomes they were getting.   On the podcast Annick Shares:   “4 years ago, I met Sylvana Mahmic, CEO of Plum Tree service provider for young children that have a developmental disability in Australia - serving 700-800 people per year. [Both Sylvana and Annick have a child with a disability.]  (They asked) if we had to scrap everything, what would be the best service offering for families that will make a serious difference?”   They took a design thinking approach, including an ethnographic research approach and rapid prototyping to build a learning program called 'Now and Next'.   Annick Shares, ”(We looked at) how can parents use their learning to build on success, and get better, and better results for their children. We started with 18 sessions, and it is now down to 8 group sessions, and 1 one on one session.   The learning program shifts the mindset of parents to understanding the power of their own agency, and the control they have over their wellbeing.       Why a Learning Program?   Paraphrasing from the podcast Annick Shares:   We are using a learning program because we found people (parents) are feeling overwhelmed, and there generally isn’t something wrong with them (grief, denial, etc.). Annick didn’t want to generalize, but what they found is that what people need is to learn strategies and solutions to get the results that are meaningful to them. Now and Next is a learning framework, rather than a therapeutic framework.       The Now and Next Program VS. The Traditional Model   There are 5 areas of differentiation that the Now and Next Program focuses on Vs. the Traditional Model.   Paraphrasing from the Podcast Annick shares:     1. The Initial Interview:   In the initial interview with a professional they ask you “Tell me about your child?”  This was a stressful situation as a mother. You eventually say… "my child can’t do this, and can’t do that." Parents are left feeling terrible. Until now we haven’t really had a better way.   In the Now and Next Program, we used the theory of gamification and created a game called, 'Pictability'. We chose pictures for the game based on our research of what people had used their individualized funding for. We designed the game so that people are brought straight into the strength domain using projective identification. People are able to identify a great future for their child and create a vision board with a long-term vision, and short-term goals. Games can bring out a lot of creativity and learning.     2. Notes are Shared:   In a typical parent – professional relationship the professional is the one that is taking and keeping the notes. These are often written up in a report by a professional that may be written in jargon and can be hard to understand for families.   With Now and Next Parents hand write their own goals, and we use technology to create a multi-media report so those goals can be shared with loved ones and supporters easily.     3. Working on Goals:   In the traditional model, I often hear that it is really hard for parents to come up with goals, and the goals are written up by the professional, as mentioned above.   In Now and Next, parents define and work on their own goals, and they become empowered. Parents choose their own goals, and parents are committed to these goals because they have chosen them.     4. Positive Psychology:   The Now and Next Program is the first of it’s kind (to Annick’s knowledge) to incorporate the concepts from Positive psychology. Traditionally psychology looked at how we can get someone from a -3 closer to zero, say -1. Positive psychology looks at how can we get someone who is at zero to +2.   Martin Seligman, one of the forefathers of positive psychology, taught us the concept of learned helplessness, which says that we bear unpleasant circumstances because we have learned they are un-escapable. But, through prospection we are able to look into the future and build a better future for ourselves. We looked at the prospection model and integrated these ideas into our model.     5. Sustainable and Scalable:   With the traditional model, there is a power imbalance and families are dependent on professionals. This is not sustainable. There is limited funding for professionals, and we cannot rely on this.   When I talk to professionals and parents all around the world and ask them how they would rate their partnership their answers don’t always match up. At the end of the day, parents are expecting professionals to do the work to ‘fix’ their child. As a society, we have put professionals in high regard, and we have given them power.   With the Now and Next Program we hold parents as the experts, and we are giving parents the tools they need to build the future they want. We have also found that Parent to Parent facilitating has proven to be most effective because of the deep understanding and empathy parents have for each other. This contributes to the scalability of the program because participants are becoming facilitators, and they can then train local people.     The Now and Next Program is measuring the amount of agency (i.e. empowerment) that a parent has, and they have demonstrated significant increases post program.     “In April 2017, the peer facilitators and alumni of the Now and Next program held their inaugural conference, entitled ‘By Families, For Families’, in Sydney, Australia. At this conference, something groundbreaking transpired, something both profoundly significant and genuinely radical: parents of young children with disability and developmental delay actively accepted responsibility for asserting their “natural authority” (Kendrick, 1995) in their partnerships with their child’s professionals and therapists.” Read more from the source article here.   Annick Reflects on the turning point with her son, Yaniv:   “I was disappointed in professionals trying to get Yaniv to fit into a ‘normal’ box, (which wasn’t working very well). There was a lot that he was teaching me, and we decided to go for the amazing and genius box. In high school, Yaniv became interested in art. In art class, he required less of a teacher aid, and this motivated Yaniv. Whereas, in the more academic classes he needed more of an aid. We took the ‘Eye of the needle’ approach, and everything they were trying to teach Yaniv would go through art. An artist needs to have a bio, and the way that you write it is by pushing this button on the computer. Today, Yaniv is an international artist. Learn more about Yaniv and his art through his website Yanivjanson.com.       A huge thank you to Dr. Annick Janson for coming onto the podcast! If you would like to learn how to bring Now and Next to your area please reach out to Annick! (email: annick@egl.ac.nz)   Thank you for reading to today's blog! If you liked this episode, and think someone you know would benefit, please share it with them! Be a part of the change to think differently about disability.     Love & Respect, Eric         Resources:     Annick’s email: annick@egl.ac.nz   Website: egl.ac.nz   Blog: Click Here   Videos: Click Here     If you received value from this content please leave me a review on iTunes. By leaving a 5 star review on iTunes you make the Empowering Ability Podcast more discoverable, and more families will benefit. Click Here To Leave a Review on iTunes       The Empowering Ability Podcast is available on iTunes and various other apps so that you can listen while on the go from your smartphone!   Click Here To Listen on iTunes

Discussing bio medical (non-medical) approaches to well-being for people with disabilities. This week’s podcast/ blog is a rebroadcast from Episode #026 with Janet Klees. Janet Klees has been involved in the lives of people with disabilities, their families, and allies in community for over 30 years. Until recently, she has been coordinator with the family-governed Deohaeko Support Network for over 20 years. She is the author of three books which are directly rooted in the Deohaeko experience, (We Come Bearing Gifts; Our Presence has Roots; Deohaeko Decades) and which are now sold around the world. Currently, Janet is the Executive Director with a family support organization, the Durham Association for Family Respite Services.    Bio- Medical (non-medical) Approaches:  The Durham Association for Family Respite Services has started a family group to discuss and learn about the impacts of diet, exercise, and mindfulness as alternatives to medication and behaviour management approaches. In my opinion, these are common sense approaches that can be explored at little cost that can get down to the root cause of symptoms or behaviours that a person is experiencing. Peter Marks, Founder and Director of the Centre for Conscious Care, got Janet and these families thinking about these integrative approaches and you can find additional resources on his website.    Paraphrasing from the podcast, Janet shares: One of the things we have started to learn about it diet. Families have started to experiment with eliminating or reducing gluten and dairy from their child’s diet, and they are sharing the results with other parents. There is a lot of research about gluten and ADS, but this isn’t just for people with ADS, it is helping people with other developmental disabilities.   (Note: In a conversation with Dr. Jennifer Forristal N.D. at a Waterloo Region Family Network Conference, Dr. Jen shared that this type of dietary change can be overwhelming for a family pull off. Dr. Jen shared with the group, to start small - start with trying no gluten or dairy for just one week. With a one week trial you can notice changes, and if those benefits are great enough you can decide to continue, or not.)   Once people’s diets are in order we can start to look at other things. One of these things is sensory integration. A person might either be over stimulated or under stimulated. There are techniques, such as using a small trampoline for 20 minutes, that are effective in helping people be calm or focus.   People are also interested in medical marijuana, and the potential benefits that it may have - especially with epilepsy. We have some families experimenting with this under the care of doctors.   We are also looking at mindfulness and bring mindfulness practices to people with disabilities. However, it isn’t just thinking about the person with the disability, it is thinking about the team that supports them. The person supporting needs to be calm and present in the moment.   If we start at a biological end then we might be able to get to the root cause of the symptoms someone is experiencing. Naturopathic doctors can be a good resource to start to think this way, make sure to find a naturopath that is familiar with developmental disabilities.   Peter Marks, Director of the Centre for Conscious Care, is joining us on an upcoming episode to teach us more about these approaches. Check out the Conscious Care website or you can pick up the book on Conscious Care from Inclusion Press to learn more.   Thank you for reading to today's blog! If you liked this episode, and think someone you know would benefit, please share it with them! Be a part of the change to think differently about disability.   Love & Respect, Eric   Resources: Peter Marks: Conscious Care Website- http://centreforconsciouscare.ca/ Book: Conscious Care and Support  for individuals with Autism & Other Developmental Disabilities: Balancing Body, Brain & Being by Peter Marks and Gareth Marks  Learning events In Durham Region: Click Here Contact Janet Klees: janet@legacies.ca   If you received value from this content please leave me a review on iTunes. By leaving a 5 star review on iTunes you make the Empowering Ability Podcast more discoverable, and more families will benefit. Click Here To Leave a Review on iTunes  The Empowering Ability Podcast is available on iTunes and various other apps so that you can listen while on the go from your smartphone!   Click Here To Listen on iTunes

This week’s guest on the podcast/ blog is David Hasbury. David shares the history of disability, and disability services to help us understand how we got to where were are today. David also shares how we can think differently about disability to create a world where people with disabilities are included as citizens. For more than 30 years, David has been committed to empowering people with disabilities to creatively shape the world around them. Since 2008, Dave has collaborated with Patti Scott, his wife and Neighbours C.E.O., in supporting people with disabilities, families, communities, organizations, and governments in making it possible for people with disabilities to live as contributing citizens and community members, where all can make a difference. David has been involved with person-centered planning since the 1980, and does his work all across the world. This blog is a summary of my conversation with David, and includes many of the insights that he shares on the podcast.   Why Are Disability Services The Way They Are? To answer this question David shares the history of developmental disability and the 3 big waves he sees.   Wave 1: In the 1800’s there was no definition of developmental disability. People were labeled as strange, crazy, or imbeciles and often thrown into jail. There was a lot of shame with disability, and people lived with families and stayed on farms.   Wave 2: Eventually, governments discovered people with developmental disabilities didn’t belong in jail, and a more hospital like setting became the norm - institutions. It was a progression from jail, and it was 'protecting' people in the community from these rather ‘odd’ folks. This lasted, for 80 years, until the 1950’s and 1960’s when the (poor) treatment of people in institutions became exposed, and it was realized that people were being warehoused, and this wasn’t right either.   Wave 3: Families that kept their sons and daughters at home got together and started to find support for their children and they focused on education in classrooms, giving birth to ‘special needs’ classes. We progressed from seeing people as strange and crazy to the ‘r-word’, and we categorized people as trainable, educable, or severely or profoundly disabled.  We formed groups/ places for people to go based on these categories. The government the applied these categories to residential life as well.   We were looking for places for people to go where they would have ‘appropriate coverage’ and safe places in community. Creating places became the thing we did and the government started buying the services of organizations (many founded by groups of parents). The government bought places in community where people with developmental disabilities would be covered (kept safe). The Next Wave: In the last 30 years, the idea of people being individuals and citizens evolved, and person-centered planning emerged. We started to imagine people with developmental disabilities as citizens, and think about how can they be included in community. People with developmental disabilities want a real education, a real job, a real life - not special. In the 2000’s the government in Ontario started to fund this type of support (Passport) to help provide these opportunities for people with disabilities. Creating places and having coverage is still the dominant model. Even with person-centered funding, people are still buying places and coverage with these support dollars. We need to think differently about that. The model of placement and coverage was not designed with the idea of citizenship, control and inclusion, and community involvement in mind.  It’s really difficult to make that happen (person-centered planning) in people’s lives when you are using an old system that was designed for a different purpose. And so, we need to do things in new ways, and we need to think differently. Placement and coverage is still dominant. In Ontario, more than 3/4 of the government budget is spent on placement and coverage, and is serving less than 1/3 of the population. So, 2/3 of the population is getting very little support.   Shifting To A More Person-Centered Approach. We need to think not so much about buying spaces, but we need to think about investing the little bit of resources we have available to grow our presence in the area the individual is truly interested in. Historically, we haven’t imagined growth for people historically for people with developmental disabilities. For example, we might think this person has the mind of a 5-year-old, and we imagined that life stopped at some point for that person. We might be stuck in a placement and coverage system, but how can we start to take some of these resources or negotiate these resources to use them in an individualized way Start with what can you do. Probably the most disabling thing is actually thinking disabled, which is can’t focused    How Do We Make The Person-Centered Shift?   Individuals & Families: Imagine the life that this person wants to have! What does Jane want to do with her time? Where does she want to be? Who does she want to be with? It is important for families to think about the person that they love in relation to other people in a community and being valued for who they are. We need to start to think about people differently. Up until someone is adult we focus on that person’s problems; in education, in health care, in support, and we need to think differently when it comes to community life. In community life, we need to think about what that person brings (their gifts, and contributions). There isn’t a group of citizens out there, we each (individually) need to be able to decide where we are going to go, and were we are going to put our time, energy and resources. Families need to think, what can we do to make this possible for those that they love. If Jane loves music and Jane can start going to karaoke night once per week for 2 hours every week, for only 2 hours, people will start to recognize that Jane loves singing and she can start to build relationships. Then, there is then a possibility for this to become more (an investment). If we invest in things that we love, those things grow. But, we have focused on placement and coverage because we have thought that people don’t have something to offer. That is the shift, people do have something to offer and we have to give them the opportunity to grow that.   Government and Service Organizations: We need to think about people as individuals. We need to think about the resources for individuals individually. Resources need to be individualized, money needs to be individualized, and people need control over that money. The people hired to support people with intellectual (developmental) disabilities needs to be individualized. There is no generic intellectual (developmental) disability.   If you are embedded in a placement and coverage model, you can’t get to citizenship from there. The principals and structure (of safety and somewhere to go) won’t let you get there (to citizenship). For example, when there is grouped support of 3 people (with a developmental disability) in a house with 1 staff person and Bob wants to go out, either everyone has to go, or Bob can’t go. (A question to consider: Is this ordinary?) From a government perspective, 20-25 % of the population of people with a developmental disability is getting 80-85% of the resources, this isn’t sustainable.   Dave’s partner, Patti Scott created an organization serving people that have a developmental disability called Neighbours in New Jersey, USA.  Neighbours empowers their customers by giving them choice and control of their life including; their staff, what they do with their time, and where they live. Patti Scott is joining me on an upcoming podcast, so be sure to tune in to learn more about Neighbours.   A big thank you to Dave Hasbury for joining us on the podcast and sharing his insights to help us think differently about disability!    Thank you for reading to today's blog! If you liked this episode and think someone you know would benefit, please share it with them! Be a part of the change to think differently about disability.   Love & Respect, Eric   Resources: Website: Neighbours-international.com Follow Neighbours International on Facebook:  https://www.facebook.com/NeighboursInternational/     If you received value from this content please leave me a review on iTunes. By leaving a 5 star review on iTunes you make the Empowering Ability Podcast more discoverable, and more families will benefit. Click Here To Leave a Review on iTunes       The Empowering Ability Podcast is available on iTunes and various other apps so that you can listen while on the go from your smartphone!   Click Here To Listen on iTunes

Learn what intentional community is, and the building blocks to build your own intentional community. This week, I am re-sharing an important conversation from Episode #022 on Intentional Community, with Janet Klees and Linda Dawe.  Janet Klees has been involved in the lives of people with disabilities, their families, and allies in community for over 30 years. Until recently, she has been coordinator with the family-governedDeohaeko Support Network for over 20 years. She is the author of three books which are directly rooted in the Deohaeko experience, (We Come Bearing Gifts; Our Presence has Roots; Deohaeko Decades) and which are now sold around the world. Currently, Janet is the Executive Director with a family support organization, the Durham Association for Family Respite Services. Linda Dawe is a founding member of the Deohaeko Support Network– a family led collective that has embodied diversity, inclusion and community since its inception in the mid 1980’s.     Intentional Community There is a lot of discussion in the disability sector about what community is and the definitions can vary widely. The conversation can range from placing groups of people (such as people with a disability and seniors) together in a building to support each other, to a diverse group of individuals coming together to build relationships and share their gifts with each other. Amazing community builder, Linda Dawe shares what she has learned about building an intentional community at Rougemount over the last 25 years: “Intentional community is not something that you measure - it is something that you feel. It isn't a thing, it is in the hearts of people, and people embrace it to different degrees. One of the things that was important in creating the intentional community at Rougemount was the diversity in the residents that represented the actual community.  Not placing groups of people together, such as seniors and people with disabilities. Intentional community at Rougemount started out as a grand thing, but simply it is just being in relationship with each other. People living well together. It requires effort, consciousness, and core people to hold the values of the community. Janet Klees adds: “Simply put, community is being a good neighbor. At Rougemount people look for opportunities to be good neighbors and then talk about it, and hold up examples of it. Intentional community isn't a building - it is a mindset! We can take the ideas with us, and many groups have. People have come into Rougemount and have seen how it works, and then brought it into neighborhoods with single family homes, and brought it into condo buildings. Rougemount is just an example of how it can work.    The Key Takeaways for me are: 1. Building Intentional Community starts with rich diversity and upholding neighbourly values. 2. Fostering Intentional Community requires us to get a common understanding of each other, and through that understanding building trust and respect. From here we can show love to each other in small little ways, and uphold those acts of love. 3. Be intentional in creating opportunities for people with disabilities to build relationship. Do not group them in housing or support.   Thank you for reading to today's blog! If you liked this episode and think someone you know would benefit, please share it with them! Be a part of the change to think differently about disability.   Love & Respect, Eric     Resources: Purchase These Books to Learn More Lesson's from Deohaeko: "We come bearing gifts" by Janet Klees  "Our Presence has roots" by Janet Klees   Learn more about Deohaeko: Click Here    Learning events In Durham Region: Click Here   Book a study tour to learn about Rougemount and Deohaeko: Click Here   Contact Janet Klees: janet@legacies.ca   If you received value from this content please leave me a review on iTunes. By leaving a 5 star review on iTunes you make the Empowering Ability Podcast more discoverable, and more families will benefit. Click Here To Leave a Review on iTunes   The Empowering Ability Podcast is available on iTunes and various other apps so that you can listen while on the go from your smartphone!   Click Here To Listen on iTunes

Learn how the OPZ family care system works, and hear Toni Smit's foster family experience. Also, hear the benefits and drawbacks of being a foster family.   Geel Belgium and OPZ Family Care:  The family care system in Geel Belgium evolved in the 1300's from the local legend for St. Dymphna. It was thought that St. Dymphna could cure any illness, and many people traveled to Geel to be cured, and ended up in the care of the church. When there was no more room left in the church families in Geel began caring for the ill. (For more on the Legend of St. Dymphna, listen to Episode #019 with Jackie Goldstein.) Today, the system provides formalized public psychiatric care and is called OPZ. On the podcast Toni shares: The OPZ patients can become boarders with foster families, and they have a 6 week orientation period to see how a the boarder adjusts to live with a foster family. If they do well in an orientation home then the OPZ tries to find a foster family. If a foster family is found, the boarder and foster family have the opportunity to get to know each other for a few days.  “You try to receive boarders into your family as you would your son or daughter. The idea is to give people a real home for the long term.” Toni and her husband consider her boarders her step sons and they integrate their boarders completely into the family, and the neighbourhood. Over the last 20 years, they’ve had 4 boarders, and they have stayed as long as they wanted. Their current boarder, Luke, has lived with Toni and her husband for the last 14 years.   Why did you become a foster family?  Toni Shares: “I’ve always been a foster mother.” There has always been other family members living with Toni and her partner. When Toni eventually settled in Geel her 84-year-old neighbour had a boarder from the OPZ. The neighbour couldn’t support the boarder anymore, and eventually the boarder ended up living with Toni and her husband. This was 20 years ago, and at the time there were 3,000 boarders living with families, and now there are only 300.   Why is there a decline in boarders? Toni Shares: "The modern way of life. The man and the woman of the household are working. 20 years ago, there were a lot of farms and often the woman stayed at home. The combination of someone always being home, and the need for help to do the work on the farm created this opportunity that was mutually beneficial. Many younger families do not even know about the OPZ, and if they do they are likely both working, and it might not make sense for them. There are also more care possibilities now that give people more choice on where they can live."     What are the benefits of being a foster family?  Toni shares:  “Love” It gives Toni and her husband a lot of joy and happiness. There is always someone home and it helps to give them a cozy home. It gives Toni someone to talk to, and to take care of. It is also a gratifying experience seeing the boarder grow and take on a lot more then they use to. Toni also shares that you start thinking about life completely differently.  "Mental illness is not a contagious disease, it is an illness and it can happen to anyone. My son had an accident and now he is mentally ill. He has changed completely, and has a completely different character and you have to get used to those things."     Why shouldn't someone become a foster family? Toni is very insistent that families should not take in a boarder as a financial solution. This is the wrong reason to take in a boarder. You do receive money for the boarder, but it doesn’t cover the costs that you have. Also, Toni shares, "Don’t do it if you can’t accept them as part of the family."     What I took away from this conversation with Toni is that, being an relationship with her boarders has given her life meaning in a way that she wouldn't get any other way. I thank Toni for coming on the podcast and sharing her life experiences as a foster family!   Love & Respect, Eric     Resources: Email Toni for a conversation: toni120@.com     If you received value from this content please leave me a review on iTunes. By leaving a 5 star review on iTunes you make the Empowering Ability Podcast more discoverable, and more families will benefit. Click Here To Leave a Review on iTunes      The Empowering Ability Podcast is available on iTunes and various other apps so that you can listen while on the go from your smartphone! Click Here To Listen on iTunes

Siblings supporting their brother's and sister's on friendships, dating, and dreaming big, with Melissa Janson   Today, we are kicking off our second mini-series on the podcast, and over the next few months we are going to focusing in on siblings. Siblings are often forgotten about in the family equation when there is a disability in the family, yet they can play such an important role. In this mini-series, we are going to be trying to answer a couple of questions about siblings; ‘What role can siblings play in their brother’s and sister’s lives?’, and ‘What support and resources are available for siblings?’.   If the sibling topic is one that interests you, you can listen to Episode #009 with Helen Rieswhere Helen shares her story and we have an important discussion about starting a conversation with your family about the role you want to play as a sibling. There are often so many assumptions about the roles family members are going to play. These assumptions are not always accurate and can lead to breakdowns, which is why it is so important to discuss the roles each family member wants to play. You might be surprised in how involved your family members want to be!   To kick off the mini-series on siblings, we have guest Melissa Janson on the show. Melissa works professionally in the disability sector, and is the sister to Yaniv, whom has a disability. Melissa and I discuss the role that we can play to support our brothers and sisters. We have a great conversation about friendships, dating, and dreaming big.   Melissa’s Story Melissa (now 28) was born in Israel and moved to New Zealand with her family in 2000. Her younger brother, Yaniv (now 25), was diagnosed with aspergers when they arrived in New Zealand. Melissa and Yaniv went to the same main stream school where Yaniv was bullied, and this was frustrating to Melissa. People couldn’t see Yaniv’s gift and skills like Melissa could.   Melissa explains, “People with aspergers can struggle to pick up social ques. It doesn’t come naturally to Yaniv to come up to someone and start a conversation, and sarcasm and humor is hard.” However, Melissa goes on to explain that Yaniv is quite funny!   Melissa works professionally in the disability sector for an anthroposophical service provider that is grounded in the theories of Rudolph Steiner which takes a holistic view of the person; spiritually, emotionally, and physically.   Melissa’s family is starting to think about what the future looks like, as a family.     Building Relationships Melissa is very close with Yaniv.  Yaniv wants to know what is happening in Melissa’s life, and Melissa wants to know what is going on Yaniv’s life. Melissa shares, “Being close and connected is my focus.”   Melissa always tries to Include Yaniv in her social outings with friends. Melissa shared that, Yaniv is sometimes not sure why and can put up some resistance, but often comes along anyway.   On the podcast, I share the story of my conversation with the great Jean Vanier. Jean left me with this piece of advice, “Befriend people that have disabilities, and influence others to befriend people with disabilities.” Melissa is playing this important role for her brother.   On the podcast, Melissa shares the story of her brother’s love interest, and how she played a facilitator role to bridge the social gaps for her brother and his date. (It is a fun story, and worth a listen).     The Power of ‘Why not?’ Melissa shares, “Aiming high is something we really have to get used to doing, because I think there’s that whole bigotry of low expectations in the disability sector. As siblings, we can support by asking ‘Why not?’.   Yaniv is a painter and has a great career as a creator. He has published 4 books, and he has sold 160 paintings. Melissa shares, “People aren’t seeing him for his disability any more, they are seeing him as an artist. My other brother and I always feel like we are chasing Yaniv.”   Melissa shares, “We need to be looking at what risk can he take. I look at this positivity. From a relationship perspective when talking with my mom she didn’t think it is possible for him to have a relationship, and I responded, why not?... he is totally capable. And if he wasn’t we would facilitate that.”   Melissa also shares this risk-taking mindset from a career standpoint, “There is a lot of risk and uncertainty in the option of trying something first and learning the skills afterward. We are forced to figure it out when we are in the situation. There is risk here, but there is also a lot of growth that can happen.” On the podcast, Melissa shares the story of Abdul-Karim Bouchafaa and how his growth has taken off by following his passion and creating his career as a Motivational non-speaker.     Melissa advises siblings to stay connected with their sibling, read up, listen to podcasts, and gather success stories to overcome adversity in your family. Also, she suggests we look out for what your sibling is really passionate about, and to help them ride that wave and pursue that as a career. I am grateful for Melissa joining me on the podcast to share her story and insights as a sibling!   Thank you for reading to today's blog! If you liked this episode and think someone you know would benefit, please share it with them! Be a part of the change to think differently about disability.     Love & Respect, Eric     Resources: Connect with Melissa Facebook: Melissa Janson (NZ) Email: melissajanson22@gmail.com Yaniv’s website: http://www.yanivjanson.com/ Abdul-Karim Bouchafaa Motivational Non - Speaker: Watch Video    If you received value from this content please leave me a review on iTunes. By leaving a 5 star review on iTunes you make the Empowering Ability Podcast more discoverable, and more families will benefit. Click Here To Leave a Review on iTunes   The Empowering Ability Podcast is available on iTunes and various other apps so that you can listen while on the go from your smartphone!  Click Here To Listen on iTunes

In this podcast, we discuss the most common question Brendon is asked by families, which is: 'How do I secure the future for my loved one with a disability?'  This week’s guest on the Empowering Ability podcast / blog is Brendon Pooran, Principal lawyer at Pooran Law in Toronto, Ontario. Brendon always had an interest in disability law, which stems from his life experience as he grew up with siblings that have a disability. Brendon and his team provide advice to families and agencies in the disability sector in Ontario, British Columbia and Newfoundland. On the podcast, we also discuss consent and capacity. What is consent and capacity? And, what do we need to know about it. You can take a listen to the podcast to hear more on consent and capacity.   Securing the Future Estate planning is the process that Brendon guides families through to create a plan for security for loved ones with a disability. We discuss both financial and relationship considerations when creating an estate plan.  A major objective is to ensure that government benefits aren’t impacted by an estate.   Starting the Estate Planning Process Paraphrasing from the podcast Brendon shares the questions he works through with families: 1) What are your objectives? If you have a loved one with a disability, what does their life look like now? What does it look like in the future? 2) What are the expenses and sources of income? What do they look like now, and what will they look like in the future? 3) Who are the people involved? There are several roles that you need to consider in your estate plan, including; an executor for estate, trustees for any trust that are set up, attorneys in power of attorney documents, and guardians that may need to be considered. *Note: The people you assign to these roles should be trustworthy (they will have access to your estate with very little oversight), conscientious and task oriented with the ability to meet deadlines, and it is a nice to have if they have a relationship with your beneficiaries.   The Will The will is the foundational pillar of the estate plan. It will incorporate tax strategies, roles, trusts and strategies that are developed for financial security for beneficiaries of the will. Many people do not have wills, and do not understand the impacts of not having a will in place. 40% of Brendon's clients are people applying to become the estate trustee because a will was not in place. There is a cost associated with this application, as well as taxes that need to be paid that could have been avoided. Also, beneficiaries can lose social assistance benefits (ex. ODSP $1200/mo – dental, drugs, vision), if an inheritance increases the beneficiary’s asset base to exceed $40,000 (in Ontario). The cost to create a will and estate plan ranges based on where you live and your situation, but typically it will cost you approximately $2,500 to set up your will.    Trusts There are several different types of trusts, and Brendon provides us with an overview of the Trusts he frequently recommends in his practice: 1) Henson Trust: The Henson Trust is a discretionary trust, which means the trustee has full authority to make decisions on the trust. This trust is not considered an asset by the Ontario Government for social assistance program purposes, and will not impact ODSP. There is also no limit to the amount of money that the trust can hold. You will also want to make sure that it qualifies as a disability trust, which helps to reduce the taxes that might be generated by the trust.   2) Lifetime Benefit Trust: This trust is typically recommended for people that have RRSPs or RRIFs in place so that these benefits can be rolled over to the beneficiary without any tax implications. A life time trust can also be used to hold assets, such as a home or property.   3) Inheritance Trust: With this trust, you can leave instructions for the trustee to disperse the trust funds as you wish. This trust is limited to $100,000, and Brendon doesn’t see this trust being used as frequently as the other two above.    Trusts are mostly written instructions left in the will, and are created when the will is executed, these are called testamentary trusts. Some families create living trusts that become active right away, called inter vivos trusts. These living trusts can be used to hold property for the beneficiaries, and the living trust can be referenced in other family member's wills so that several different trusts don’t have to be created and managed.   On the podcast, Brendon shares the story of a family that increased their estate value by over $200,000 through tax planning and trust strategies. Brendon and I also discuss power of attorney, if a person with a disability should have a will, ODSP, RRSPs, and life insurance policies on the podcast. Take a listen if you are interested in these topics! I strongly recommend that you consult with a professional lawyer, tax accountant, and financial planner when creating your estate plan. I thank Brendon for coming on the podcast and sharing his important insights on securing the future for our loved ones!    Love & Respect, Eric       Resources: Website: Pooranlaw.com Inspiring possibilities estate planning guide:  www.planinspiringpossibilities.com Partners for planning resources: Click Here   If you received value from this content please leave me a review on iTunes. By leaving a 5 star review on iTunes you make the Empowering Ability Podcast more discoverable, and more families will benefit. Click Here To Leave a Review on iTunes   The Empowering Ability Podcast is available on iTunes and various other apps so that you can listen while on the go from your smartphone!   Click Here To Listen on iTunes

Bill Hiltz shares his story of how he was mistreated and caged in an institution as a toddler, freed by loving people, and how he has grown into a leader advocating for positive change for people with disabilities.   In this podcast episode, I had the pleasure of interviewing ‘Team Bill’, including; Bill Hiltz, and his supporters Joyce Balaz and Arn Row. Bill is a disability advocate that is promoting positive change in the Ontario political arena by sharing what it is like to live in his shoes. Bill is non-verbal, and he is impacted by an uncontrolled seizure disorder that can rule his life.        Bill Hiltz’s Story   Paraphrasing from the Podcast Joyce and Arn share:   Joyce: “When Bill was born there were complications with the birth that led to Bill’s seizures. At the time, his family didn’t have the resources and supports to provide for Bill, and Bill went into foster care system at 1.5 years old. Bill went into a number of foster families, in and out of the hospital, and then ended up at Christopher Robin, which was an institution in Ajax, Ontario. The institution was closing when Bill was 8 years old, and a family who had already adopted another child came back to the institution and adopted Bill.   Arn: “It is important to share Bills experience in that institution. Bill’s time was mostly spent in a crib cage, which had 4 sides and a top on it. Bill wore a helmet because he was banging his head on the bars, which was Bill’s way of trying to tell whoever would listen that he didn’t want to be in there.”   Joyce: “When he was taken in by the family after the institution they just loved him to death, and he lived with them for 12 years (until he was 19). The father providing most of the care fell ill, as well the 3 (other) boys of the family where moving out of the home – so it was a time for transition (for Bill).”   Joyce, who was Bills educational assistant (EA) at school since the age of 13, heard that Bill was looking for a new home. Bill and Joyce gave living together a couple of trial runs and it went well. Bill then moved in with Joyce. Since then they have blazed a trail with their advocacy work, and growing and learning together.     (Left to right: Arn Row, Bill Hiltz, Joyce Balaz)     Start with the Assumption of Capability When you see Bill you wouldn’t expect him to have done the things that he has done in his life. When Bill was in the institution as a toddler he was caged because he was misunderstood. Assumptions where made about his capability, or should I say incapability. Bill was shown love and respect by the family that adopted him, and since by Joyce, Arn, and many others. Bill’s story highlights the dangers of starting with the assumption that a person isn’t capable. By assuming a person is NOT capable we keep them caged and deny the opportunity to live their best life. When we start with the assumption that a person IS capable, we give that person the opportunity to grow and live their best possible life. What is the worst thing that can happen if we start with the assumption that someone is capable? They fail, and hopefully learn so they can be more successful in their next attempt. (Yes, it is important that we consider holding people capable in an environment that is safe for them so that if they do fail they have the opportunity to get back up and try again.) Always start by holding people capable, disability or not! Bill taught me this invaluable lesson. When I first met Bill I assumed that Bill wasn’t capable of having a conversation with me – and boy did he prove me wrong! Thank you, Bill. We discuss holding people capable in more depth on the podcast.     Our Fear of ‘Different’ It took me well over 5 days of being around Bill before I actually engaged in a conversation with him. What took me so long to talk with Bill?   It was my own fear.   I judged Bill because I had perceived Bill as being different than me. This self-acknowledgement hit me square between the eyes. My sister has a disability, and I have several friends that have disabilities, and this fear was still present inside of me. What does this fear look like for others that have not had contact with people with visible disabilities like I have?   Joyce had a similar experience when first meeting Bill as an educational assistant (EA). Joyce shares, “…. I told the teacher that I didn’t want to work with Bill because I didn’t know how to work with him. The first time that I told Bill this he was mad, and didn’t talk to me for two weeks. Now that he has heard this story a number of times it has given him an opportunity to think about how other people view him.”   How is your fear holding you back from interacting with a person that you perceive as different? It could be a person with a disability, a person from a different ethnic background, or a different religion.      How Do We Best Communicate with Bill (and others that have a developmental disability): In this episode, we discuss how it can be difficult to enter into a conversation with a person when there isn’t a response or acknowledgement back from the other person.  This doesn’t mean that that person isn’t interested in engaging with you. Here are 3 tips we provide on the podcast to communicate with people that have a developmental disability: 1)  Be patient 2) Be sincere 3) Ask how to best communicate with the person   Bill has shared, we need to learn how to slow down. A fast pace verbal world isn’t the world that Bill lives in. Bill gives others the gift by providing them to slow down and operate at his frequency.      Bill Hiltz’s Advocacy Work Bill’s seizures have such a severe impact on his energy that he has forgone his recreational activities, such as horseback riding, and uses his energy to solely focus on his advocacy work.   Bill envisions a world where we are seen as we who we are, not for what is different. Bill shares, “People have been excluded for so long, which means people see the difference first. When people we are truly included others get to experience who we really are.”   Bill has started the “Walk a Mile in My Shoe” project (seen in the blog cover photo) where he invites people to acquire a disability, (for example loss of sight, hearing, or physical ability), and walk beside him to experience what it is like to live with a disability for a short amount of time. Bill’s theory is that the experience will lead to understanding, which will lead to change.   You can support Bill by visiting his website, or participating in/ sponsoring one of his events. The proceeds go to the organization Reach for the Rainbow, which provided Bill with camp experiences as he grew up.      Bill shares his wisdom with us in his powerful poem, titled 'Understanding People'   UNDERSTANDING PEOPLE    A SET OF STANDARDS BY WHICH TO JUDGE  TO THEIR FRIENDS, THEY GIVE A NUDGE  WHEN THEY SEE ME COME THEIR WAY,  THEY STOP AND WALK THE OTHER WAY  OR EVEN WORSE, THEY STOP AND STARE  AS IF I'M STUPID AND UNAWARE.  IF ONLY THEY COULD KNOW, THAT I CARE;  HOW PEOPLE VIEW ME--IT'S JUST NOT FAIR!  I FEEL THE VERY SAME AS OTHERS DO,  THEY SHOULD TRY AND WALK IN MY SHOE.  LIFE'S NOT EASY, WHEN THE BODY THAT YOU OWN  WAS GIVEN TO YOU BROKEN-DOWN.  THEY MAY BE MEAN; THEY MAY BE CRUEL; THEY MAY BE BAD;  BUT MOST OF ALL...THEY JUST DON'T UNDERSTAND.  WITH SOME TIME AND SPECIAL GUIDANCE;  WE CAN HAVE A GREAT ALLIANCE.  FOR AN HOUR, OR FOR A DAY;  WE ALL NEED FRIENDS ALONG THE WAY.  SO WHEN YOU SEE ME COME ALONG  TRY NOT TO FOCUS ON WHAT IS WRONG;  I AM A PERSON JUST LIKE YOU,  WHO NEEDS AND DESERVES A GOOD FRIEND TOO.  JUST WALK BESIDE ME STRAIGHT AND TALL  AND BE THE FRIEND THAT I CAN CALL  WHEN I AM LONELY AND AFRAID.  JUST REMEMBER WHAT I'VE SAID:  ALL YOU NEED IS TO UNDERSTAND;  DO NOT JUDGE JUST TAKE MY HAND.    - Bill Hiltz  1998      I thank Bill, Joyce, and Arn for coming on the podcast to share their story and insights!   Love & Respect, Eric   Resources:   Walk a Mile in my Shoe: Video: Click Here   Walk a Mile in my Shoe Website: www.inmyshoe.ca     If you received value from this content please leave me a review on iTunes. By leaving a 5 star review on iTunes you make the Empowering Ability Podcast more discoverable, and more families will benefit. Click Here To Leave a Review on iTunes       The Empowering Ability Podcast is available on iTunes and various other apps so that you can listen while on the go from your smartphone!   Click Here To Listen on iTunes

Parenting author, Ann Douglas, discusses parenting a child with a mental illness /disability, and practicing self-care so we are available as care-givers.   This week on the podcast/ blog I welcome Ann Douglas, author of numerous books on parenting with over half a million copies sold. Ann and I discuss her newest book titled “Parenting Through the Storm”, which is a guide to parenting a child who is struggling with Mental health, neuro-developmental, or behavioural challenges. We also focus in on self-care for parents (and supporters), and discuss why it is important, tips to practice self-care, and how to create the space for yourself.   Parenting Through the Storm In the writing of this book, Ann interviewed 50 other parents that have been through it, and she found many common threads through all of their experiences. She took her research findings as well as her own personal experiences and wrote this book to provide practical advice for parents.  On the podcast Ann shares, “I wrote this book because all 4 of my kids had some sort of challenge, and at the time I thought ‘ I must be doing it wrong.’ I desperately needed to know that things could get better – and they have! Parents are resilient, children are resilient, and families are resilient. It is possible to go through all these storms together and to come out stronger and more connected on the other side” You can learn more about the book at www.anndouglas.net.     Is There a Right Way to Parenting? On the podcast Ann shares, “There is a right way for your family, and you figure that out over time. Each of my 4 kids needed a different approach to parenting. It isn’t cookie cutter, because everyone is different. There were times that 1 of our kids needed ¾ of the parenting energy, which left only tiny little slices for the rest of the kids…. I felt guilty about that… but there are times when our attention had to shift around.”    What is Self-Care?  and  Why is it Important? On the podcast Ann shares, “Sometimes people think about self-care as self-indulgence, for example, sitting on the couch eating bonbons. But, that isn’t how it usually plays out. Mainly it is about taking good care of yourself so that you have something left to give to the family member who needs you. When you are parenting a child, who is struggling you can’t afford to get completely burnt out and depleted. Without you your child will be lost.”   “Even though it can feel selfish I would argue it isn’t selfish, it is self-preservation.”     Practicing Self-Care We are all unique in our own ways, and the best way for us to practice self-care is unique to us. We all have a self-care tool box filled with tools to refill our energy tanks, sometimes we just aren’t opening the toolbox frequently enough.   Ann provides 3 tips to practicing great self-care. 1) Physical Activity – Move your body in a way that is right for you. For Ann, this means taking 2 walks per day. (For me, this means breaking a sweat every morning by running or biking. Physical activity supports our physical health, and also enhances our brain function.)   2) Social Support – Ann shares, “It takes a village to raise a child, and I would argue it takes a village to support the parents that are supporting that child. Accept help when it is offered, and ask for help when you need it.” When you have help use the space to practice good self-care to fill your energy tank.   3) A Creative Outlet – Ann Shares, “Creative outlets take the focus away from worries, and brings our focus into that activity. There is research that shows that when our brain is actively engaged in a different activity (a hobby, etc.) it leaves us feeling more refreshed vs. vegging out on the couch.”   Tips For Creating the Space for Self-Care: > Let others help you, and take a slice of that time to do something kind for yourself. > Ask for help. It is a great opportunity that you are giving someone else when you ask them to help – lose the guilt about that. > If we need to find the time then look at where you are wasting the time. For how many hours are you watching TV, or on your phone? > Don’t be seduced into the that zoning out, find a creative activity. > Be intentional about creating the space in your day for self-care. (I block off the first 2 hours of my day to break a sweat, read, meditate)   Ann shares her personal story of falling into bad habits that resulted in poor sleep, anxiety, and gaining 100 lbs, then breaking the cycle, building positive self-care habits, and loosing those 100 lbs.   I thank Ann for coming on the podcast/ blog to share the what she has learned on her parenting journey, and for sharing her wealth of knowledge on self-care to help us live happy and healthy lives.   If you enjoyed this blog/ podcast  Subscribe to our mailing list and get a new episode every week!   Love & Respect, Eric   Resources: Learn more about Ann's Books: Click Here Contact Ann Douglas on Twitter: @anndouglas   If you received value from this content please leave me a review on iTunes. By leaving a 5 star review on iTunes you make the Empowering Ability Podcast more discoverable, and more families will benefit. Click Here To Leave a Review on iTunes   The Empowering Ability Podcast is available on iTunes and various other apps so that you can listen while on the go from your smartphone!   Click Here To Listen on iTunes

In this week’s podcast/ blog our featured guest is Jeff Dobbin, Executive Director of Partners for Planning (P4P) in Toronto Ontario. Jeff and I discuss the idea of creating a culture of possibility for people with disabilities, why planning and intentionality is so important, the three most important building blocks to think about when getting started with planning, and the resources that P4P provides to help you create an incredible ordinary life.   P4P, an affiliate of PLAN BC and a member of the Ontario Independent Facilitation Network (OIFN), is a family driven organization that started in 2009 to create resources and community supports for families caring for a relative with a disability. They developed the P4P Planning Network, which is an online resource that was created for families across Ontario, but is accessed by people across the world!   The online tool provides valuable information on six key areas; life planning, building relationships, work and contribution, legal and financial planning (RDSP), creating a home of your own, and supports.   P4P is also very well known for the webcasts that they produce on these six areas where they engage in thoughtful discussions with experts, and take live questions from the audience. They host approximately 40 free webinars per year and you can check out their upcoming webinars on the planning network home page.   The P4P website also hosts a doc zone – short documentaries profiling short video stories to help us learn what is possible and a professional services directory that can help you find professionals with disability expertise. P4P also published the book titled ‘Safe and Secure’, by Al Etmanski.  They are currently updating Safe & Secure and it will be available on the Planning Network this fall.   All resources on the Planning Network are available at no cost.    The Culture of Possibility:  On the podcast, Jeff shares, “If people that haven’t had a lot of opportunity to be involved in their community - for example (they have been) in segregated schools, or a congregated program the whole idea of participating fully as a citizen is an extreme idea for many people. So, one of the things we do at P4P is share stories of hope and possibility to help people realize that people with disabilities can contribute and live full and unique lives.” (These stories are told on the webcasts, and in the doc zone.)   Planning Enables Possibility: On the podcast Jeff shares, “What many families will tell us is that very little happens unless their family is intentionally involved in directing things. I have 3 kids, and they have more or less figured out their own lives – they have their own jobs, and financial resources and they have moved out, but I am fully aware that doesn’t always happen when there is a disability involved. Also, with all the waitlists in Ontario you can’t sit back and wait for the government to provide all the supports you need. We also encourage families to be proactive because of the individualized funding that has become more available, and because of a move toward community based approaches. Families have an opportunity to create incredible things around work, contribution, and relationships.”    3 Things to Consider When Starting Your Planning:  On the Podcast Jeff shares: 1) Create a Vision. Think about the life you would like to help your son or daughter create. What is important? What is possible? Don’t be afraid to dream.   2) Building Relationships. Who will be there for your sons and daughters when you can no longer care for them? Don’t be afraid to invite others into your life and your son’s and daughter’s life. (Eric: Building relationships has had a huge impact on my sister’s life, but also my mother’s life – as she feels more supported. This is something that an independent facilitator or coach can support with. To learn more about independent facilitation you can listen to episode 3, ‘Independent Facilitation and Support Circles Enriching lives’, and also check out the Ontario Independent Facilitator Network (OIFN) website.   3) Financial Resources. Access the financial resources that are available to you to support making your vision a reality. In Canada, you can open an RDSP if you are eligible for the disability tax credit (DTC). For example, if you open an RDSP at the age of 5, and you qualify for grants and bonds fully, at age 35 you would have a $350,000 asset and over a lifetime $1,000,000 asset. This type of asset is a life changer. Check out the P4P learning center to learn more about the RDSP.    I thank Jeff for coming on the podcast/ blog to share the message of creating a culture of possibility for people with disabilities, and for educating us on the resources the P4P team has created to help us live into the vision we create for ourselves and our loved ones.   If you enjoyed this blog/ podcast  Subscribe to our mailing list and get a new episode every week!   Love & Respect, Eric   Resources: Partner's for Planning (P4P) Website: Click Here Ontario Independent Facilitation Network (OIFN) Website: Click Here  The Art of Belonging (Ted Talks Inspired): Click Here Contact Jeff Dobbin: jdobbin@p4p.ca   If you received value from this content please leave me a review on iTunes. By leaving a 5 star review on iTunes you make the Empowering Ability Podcast more discoverable, and more families will benefit. Click Here To Leave a Review on iTunes   The Empowering Ability Podcast is available on iTunes and various other apps so that you can listen while on the go from your smartphone!   Click Here To Listen on iTunes  

We welcome Janet Klees back to the podcast/ blog this week discuss building natural relationships, bio medical approaches to well-being, and the different approach her organization, Durham Association for Family Respite Services, takes to supporting families. Janet has been involved in the lives of people with disabilities, their families, and allies in community for over 30 years. She is the author of three books which are directly rooted in her experience with the Deohaeko Family Support Network, (We Come Bearing Gifts; Our Presence has Roots; Deohaeko Decades) and which are now sold around the world to present the unique options of this family group.   So how is Durham Association for Family Respite Services different? Janet explains that often a family’s first question is: “Can I pay you to do that for me?”. Janet’s answer is: “Well no. But I will teach you, and give you practical supports along the way.” The organization believes so strongly in the approach of empowering individuals and families to make their own choices and keeping control of their lives that they are changing their name to the Durham Association for Family Resources and Supports.   The organization started 35 years ago as a family respite organization, and has since evolved to focus on full life planning, and helping families to think about what a good life is. The organization is grounded in Social Role Valorization (SRV) methodologies and some of the services they offer are listed here. I am listing these services for you because the organization frequently hosts free workshops that you can attend, and they are open to having a conversation with you – even if you are from outside of the Durham Region.   Facilitation and planning; helping people imagine what a good life is, creating a plan and putting the plan into action. Support recruitment; helping people recruit good support people, and providing a minimum a one day training to make sure they understand a SRV style of support. Administrative support; templates and forms to make hiring support easier. Free Training; workshops for families and supporters to learn what has worked to help people with disabilities create a good life. Family to family learning; families get together to talk about themes, such as housing and bio medical (non-medication) approaches. Brokering and financial supports; helping families by doing the administrative functions with individual funding dollars.     Building Context for Relationships BCR is a Strategy that was figured out while working with the families of Deohaeko Family Support Network. The parents were very clear that there was need to have relationships in their son’s and daughter’s lives. The group looked at what they were doing right, instead of what they were doing wrong, and this pattern emerged. What they noticed is that relationships had evolved between people with a disability, and people that do not have a (visible) disability.   The Deohaeko Family Support Network had taken a social role valorization (SRV) approach. Janet provides an overview of SRV: “The SRV framework says that human beings are very judgmental by nature. We make quick judgements about whether you are like me, or you are weird and different. We can take this human tendency and use it for the good by developing positive roles, such as the Blue Jays fan, the dog walker, etc.. This strategy has helped people create positive roles, and the roles are like a glue. In the role you end up meeting other people who see you in a positive way, and those people end up being open to a different kind relationship in your life. We don’t group people together – when we group people with a disability all (other) people see is the disability. They don’t see the person for who they are and the positive roles they have. Often, families haven’t thought about their son or daughter as a contributing member. We haven’t thought about what son or daughter’s job might be.”   Janet provides a larger overview of SRV in this blog.     BCR: A 4-Part Strategy to Create Situations Were Relationships Are More Likely to Arise.   Janet explains: 1) Find ordinary places where people share your interest. Follow the interests of the person and think about where other people are that are interested in your interest. For example, if your interest is dogs other people interested in dogs are at: the dog park, dog training, walking dogs, dog clubs, stray dog associations, etc.. We are looking for typical and ordinary places in community, not places segregated for people with a disability. 2) Go to the same place frequently. To build relationships you need to be among the same people regularly. Pick one place, use your 1 to 1 support to support, and be there often (ex. Once per week). 3) Find a way to contribute. You want people to have a role in those places in community. So often people with a disability are just spectators. If you look at a music festival most are just spectators, but there are so many opportunities to have a role as a volunteer (ex. free samples, filling water bottles, assistant to the golf cart driver). This gives the person a role, and makes relationship easier.  4) Other people have to be present. Supporters are a bridge to relationships with others, and they need to play a role in facilitating relationships. The paid support person can be looked at as the friend. They are being paid and likely will not be there for that person’s entire life.    BCR In Action: On the podcast Janet shares several stories of how people have used the BCR strategy to build relationships. You can listen to the podcast to hear them all.   Paraphrasing from the podcast, Janet shares Johnathan’s story: “Johnathan has a small shredding business that he takes it into work places. He was working at the local police station, and really enjoyed it. He felt like he was important, and he felt like he belonged. That police station was closed down, but hey really valued Johnathan so he was invited to the big regional police station to continue his role. After 3 weeks at the regional police station Johnathan said he didn’t want to go anymore. They had put him in a backroom alone to do his shredding, and he didn’t have his relationships anymore. The shredding business was just a vehicle for relationships. When the relationships weren’t there, he no longer wanted to work. They talked to the police station, and Johnathan moved to a room where he was with people and he enjoyed his job again – because of the relationships.”   Bio- Medical (non-medical) Approaches In a recent study, led by Yona Lunsky, psychologist at Centre for Addiction and Mental Healthfound that thousands of people with down syndrome, autism and other developmental disabilities are being prescribed anti-psychotic medication despite a lack of evidence that the drugs actually help them. (Reference: Toronto Star)   This highlights the importance of thinking about bio-medical approaches to well-being for people with disabilities. The Durham Association for Family Respite Services has started a family group to discuss this, and they are learning about the impacts of diet, exercise, and mindfulness (of supporters) as alternatives to medication. In my opinion, these are common sense approaches that can be explored at little cost that can get down to the root cause of symptoms or behaviors that a person is experiencing. Peter Marks of Conscious Care focuses in this area, and you can find additional resources on his website. We are hoping to have Peter on an upcoming episode to learn more about these approaches.   I thank Janet for coming onto the podcast and sharing her experience in helping people with disabilities to build relationships, and for getting us thinking about non-medical approaches to well-being.   If you enjoyed this blog/ podcast  Subscribe to our mailing list and get a new episode every week!   Love & Respect, Eric      Resources: Purchase These Books to Learn More Lesson's from Janet Klees: "We come bearing gifts" by Janet Klees  "Our Presence has roots" by Janet Klees   Free learning events In Durham Region: Click Here Durham Association for Family Respite Services  Monthly newsletter: Click Here Housing website: imagininghome.ca Peter Marks: Conscious Care  Contact Janet Klees: janet@legacies.ca     If you received value from this content please leave me a review on iTunes. By leaving a 5 star review on iTunes you make the Empowering Ability Podcast more discoverable, and more families will benefit. Click Here To Leave a Review on iTunes The Empowering Ability Podcast is available on iTunes and various other apps so that you can listen while on the go from your smartphone!   Click Here To Listen on iTunes

This week’s guest on Empowering Ability Podcast and Blog is Chris Woodhead, Group Director of Housing and Business Development for Dimensions UK.  We talk about housing in the UK, and the approach Dimensions UK has for supporting people with learning disabilities and autism spectrum disorder (ASD) to find and create a home in Part 5/6 of the mini-series on housing for people with a disability.   Chris Woodhead has twenty years of experience in the housing, care and charity sectors in the UK. In 2016, Chris joined Dimensions UK to support the organization on their mission to provide high quality personalized support for people with learning disabilities and autism, helping them to be actively engaged with, and contribute to, their communities. Dimensions UK started about 30 years ago when institutions were closing and they currently support approximately 5,000 people across England and Whales. The approach to support Dimensions UK takes is to give people choice and control over their lives. For Dimensions UK it is about delivering personalized services by understanding the client’s needs so that they can deliver just enough support for them to achieve in their lives.   Housing in the UK  On the podcast Chris Woodhead shares:  The UK is a small and old country where land is at an absolute premium, this makes housing challenging. The UK culture is founded upon home ownership, whereas in the rest of Europe, rental is a more accepted norm. However, home ownership is difficult to achieve for most because housing prices are so high.   3 Main Ways to Have a Home: 1) Buy. For people that face a challenge to get into the employment market (many people with a disability) it is extremely difficult to realistically purchase a property. It is becoming an exclusive market that favors the wealthy.  2) Rent. The rental market is also prosperous in the UK and is becoming harder to access. It is incredibly difficult to find a rental in London – there is an exclusive barrier unless you have high income. 3) The Social and Affordable Rented Market. This market was created for people that were on lower incomes. This worked really well from the 2nd world war until the mid 80’s when there was a housing build program, and there were a lot of solutions for people who needed them. The rates at which these units become available have slowed, people are having to wait an awful long time for housing. Demand far outstrips supply.   People with low income can apply for housing benefits (being replaced by a system called Universal credit), which is a type of rental subsidy. However, rentals are becoming increasingly difficult to find with the amount of funding provided. In some cases, people have had to move to different city were rents are cheaper, which is taking people out of the city they call home.   Summary: Expensive to buy, increasingly expensive to rent in private market, increasing demands on social affordable housing.   Dimensions Approach to Housing  Paraphrased from the Podcast Chris Woodhead shares: Dimensions UK’s aspiration is for people to have their own front door. Not all of Dimensions UK’s accommodation is in line with this aspiration at this time. For example, some housing is larger scale accommodation with 10 people living in one large accommodation, but over time Dimensions UK looking to remodel for a smaller scale more personalized approach. Housing and support are generally separate. Dimensions holds a core value that where you live is important to quality of life (health and wellbeing), but people should be able to choose who supports them. You shouldn’t have to move if you are unhappy with your support. There is a delineation between the tenancy agreement and the support contract. We operate around choice and control. If we get their housing right, and we get their support right then we hope they will continue to choose us.   Dimensions UK's 3 Approaches to Housing 1) Build new housing at the right price. We need to create properties that have an affordable rent so that people can use the rental subsidy to pay for housing. We need to find the right places to build, at the right place so people can afford the rents.  2) Remodel, refurbish or knock down and rebuild existing housing (to give people their own front door). 3) Signposting (guiding) people into the right accommodation for them. This can be with registered providers (public sector organizations that provide affordable housing), or into the private rental sector (called brokerage).   How do people work with you? Very few people self-refer to Dimensions, this just isn’t how the system works in the UK. Most people are referred by the National Health Service (NHS) social services or a professional service practitioner. If living an independent life is right for an individual then they would likely be referred into us.     How do you find the right housing?  Contact and conversation between the individual, the family, friends and the social workers/ professionals that understand that person. ‘Referral to residence’ is my pet term for it.   1) Understand the person: what do they want to achieve? What facilities do they need nearby? What modifications to the property would be needed (sensory experience, items of safety)?, What location (near family and friends)?, What social activities do they want to be involved in? The individual, family, and friends are very involved in the process.   2) Work out what is important for that person to achieve and help them with a support package that considers the 8 domains in the Activate model. (See a description of Dimensions UK Activate Model at the end of the blog.)   3) The Dimensions Advisors look for accommodation (termed Brokerage). Dimensions has been nominated for awards several times for their Brokerage Service, learn more here.    Paraphrasing from the Podcast Chris shares this important insight: “When an individual’s wishes are reflected, it is the best chance for a successful transition is when we get it right the first time. I have been around long enough in the social care sector to see when support has failed, and it would be twice as hard the second time around. Confidence of the family plummets, and the fear and confidence of the person being supported is damaged too. Take the time, and put the thought into getting it right the first time. This can take a year to get this right, which can seem like a long time, but it isn’t if you compare to the experience of people living in an institution.”    The New Activate Model This is a new researched based model that was piloted with 24 homes of 1-8 people over a 2-year period. The model focuses on 8 different domains in each person’s life:   1)  Physical health and wellbeing 2) Communication and social interaction 3) The physical environment 4) Skills 5) Relationships 6) Service Staff 7) Service Management 8) Wider organizations     The two unexpected outcomes from the activate model research were 1) a 60% reduction in challenging behaviour, and 2) an increase in satisfaction for support staff. If you would like to learn more about the research, and watch the short videos visit the Dimensions UK website.    I thank Chris for coming onto the podcast and sharing his experience in housing, giving us an overview of the housing landscape in the UK, and for sharing lessons learned that can help us to empower people with disabilities to create a home of their own.   I’ve created a FREE workbook to help you create your vision of the best housing solution for you and to take the first steps toward implementing this solution. Click Here to download the free workbook. Our mini-series on housing for people with disabilities is continuing so go ahead and Subscribe to the mailing list to get all 6 episodes sent directly to your inbox! Love & Respect, Eric     Resources:   Dimensions UK Website: https://www.dimensions-uk.org/   Contact Dimensions UK: Click Here   Activate Model Research: Click Here    If you received value from this content please leave me a review on iTunes. By leaving a 5 star review on iTunes you make the Empowering Ability Podcast more discoverable, and more families will benefit. Click Here To Leave a Review on iTunes    The Empowering Ability Podcast is available on iTunes and various other apps so that you can listen while on the go from your smartphone!   Click Here To Listen on iTunes

In my conversations with people with disabilities, their families, and supporters one of the biggest dreams they have is social acceptance. This blog and podcast gives steps we can take to start creating a more inclusive world for people with disabilities. We are talking stigma in part 2 of our interview with Jackie Goldstein. Jackie is an observer, educator, author and speaker on community care support models. Jackie's book, 'Voices of Hope For Mental Illness; Not Against, With', shares the stories of many community care models across the world, and she also discusses Dr. Patrick Corrigan’s work on breaking down stigmas.  Miriam-Webster Dictionary defines stigma as: a set of negative and often unfair beliefs that a society or group of people have about something. Paraphrasing from the podcast Jackie Goldstein shares, “Stigmas develop out of stereotypes. When people think of mental illness (and disability) we are afraid, and we think people with a mental illness will be a problem to take care of. We all develop stigma about people’s skin colour, age, and country of origin, etc. What we do is we take limited information, and we apply it to an entire group. This isn’t fair to the individual.”  Patrick Corrigan US based Author and advocate for people with mental illness, has conducted research studies on stigma and found that there are three different approaches we can take to break down stigma. Patrick Corrigan focuses on mental illness, but I believe there is a large overlap with disabilities in general.    The 3 Common Weapons to Break Stigma:   1. Protest. Making people aware of the cause/ situation. Example: March and demonstrate in the street, or write a letter to the editor. 2. Education. Provide information so that people can make informed decisions. Example: Listen to a podcast or watch a video to learn about a cause or situation. 3. Contact. Interaction with a person that you hold that stigma against. Example: Have a conversation with a person that has a mental illness.     Effectiveness of These Weapons:  In a 2002 publication of World Psychiatry, Patrick Corrigan and Amy Watson shared these findings in the article titled, ‘Understanding the impact of stigma on people with mental illness’.  “Protest is a reactive strategy; it attempts to diminish negative attitudes about mental illness, but fails to promote more positive attitudes that are supported by facts. Education provides information so that the public can make more informed decisions about mental illness. This approach to changing stigma has been most thoroughly examined by investigators. Research, for example, has suggested that persons who evince a better understanding of mental illness are less likely to endorse stigma and discrimination (17,19,52). Hence, the strategic provision of information about mental illness seems to lessen negative stereotypes. Several studies have shown that participation in education programs on mental illness led to improved attitudes about persons with these problems (22,53-56). Education programs are effective for a wide variety of participants, including college undergraduates, graduate students, adolescents, community residents, and persons with mental illness. Stigma is further diminished when members of the general public meet persons with mental illness who are able to hold down jobs or live as good neighbors in the community. Research has shown an inverse relationship between having contact with a person with mental illness and endorsing psychiatric stigma (54,57). Hence, opportunities for the public to meet persons with severe mental illness may discount stigma. Interpersonal contact is further enhanced when the general public is able to regularly interact with people with mental illness as peers.”   These research findings highlight the importance of sharing our individual and family stories of disability to break down stigma. We can educate people about our disabilities through a blog, video, or story book. Or better yet, we can make contact with others and share our story in conversation. This creates a common understanding and builds connection. A story I've heard of a family that effectively broke down stigma for their daughter with a disability wrote a story book complete with pictures to share their daughter's journey with her classmates (she was in a regular classroom). The other kids in the class were so interested in the story they each started to take the book home to share the story with their parents. After learning the daughter’s story, the other kids and parents were no longer scared of the disability, and started to interact with her more.   Patrick Corrigan also writes about self-stigma and how it negatively impacts us. You can read more about self-stigma in this interview with Patrick Corrigan by Aisha Jamil: Q&A with Dr. Patrick Corrigan: Public Disclosure Promotes Empowerment and Reduces Self-Stigma Jackie leaves us with a brilliant quote from the podcast, “When you are all doing the same thing people forget about the disability and it isn’t noticed.”  Our mini-series on housing for people with disabilities is continuing so go ahead and Subscribeto the mailing list to get all 6 episodes sent directly to your inbox!   Love & Respect, Eric      Resources: Email Jackie: jlgoldst@samford.edu   Jackie's Book, 'Voices of Hope for Mental Illness: Not Against, With' Click Here  Q&A with Dr. Patrick Corrigan: Public Disclosure Promotes Empowerment and Reduces Self-Stigma: Click Here  Dr. Patrick Corrigan, World Psychiatry publication: ‘Understanding the impact of stigma on people with mental illness’    If you received value from this content please leave me a review on iTunes. By leaving a 5 star review on iTunes you make the Empowering Ability Podcast more discoverable, and more families will benefit. Click Here To Leave a Review on iTunes    The Empowering Ability Podcast is available on iTunes and various other apps so that you can listen while on the go from your smartphone!   Click Here To Listen on iTunes

This is the story of Michael Mainland’s incredible ordinary life. Michael is 38 years old, works at Boston Pizza, has his own house, lives with a roommate and volunteers regularly. What may come as a surprise to some is that Michael has a developmental disability that caused him to become non-verbal and reduced fine motor skills as he grew older.   Michael’s Story in Starting in High School: I had the opportunity to interview Michael’s mother, Alice Mainland, to learn Michael’s story and to learn how Michael has created his ordinary life. In the 2 months before Michael graduated from high school, Michael and his family realized they had a problem; there would be nothing for Michael once school ended. One of his parents would have to stay home to support Michael, and the family would drop down to a single income. Alice started making phone calls to various support agencies, local government, and basically anyone with a phone number that might be able to help. The people she called were willing to help! With the support of a few agencies the family was able to piece together support for Michael and this allowed the family to stay a two-income family. Alice shares, “You don’t know what resources are available to you until you ask. “   At 29, Michael had the opportunity to move out of home because of a conversation 4 -5 years earlier when Alice was searching for support for Michael.     Michael’s Life Today:  Michael’s family purchased a duplex where Michael lives with a roommate in one unit, and a supportive neighbor lives in the second unit who is available for overnight support. The family focused on creating a great home for the supportive neighbor, and this strategy has been effective at attracting and retaining long-term tenants. The first few weeks Michael lived on his own was a worrisome time for Alice and her husband, however their worries didn’t become a reality.  During the week Michael lives at his own house, works at Boston Pizza, and volunteers at the local foodbank. On weekends, Michael gets to spend quality time with his parents on their rural property. Alice and Michael often run errands on the weekend in town and Michael has 2-3 times the number of people saying hello to him compared to his mother. This is a great sign that Michael is building relationships in his community.     What’s next for the family?   Michael’s family is thinking about things like, who is going to take care of the house when Alice and her husband aren’t there?  Who will help Michael make decisions? To ensure continuity in Michael’s future his family is looking at forming a micro-board. The purpose of the micro-board will be to help manage the home, and to help Michael make future decisions.     Lessons we can learn from Michael and his Family on living an ordinary life:   Ask for help. Michael’s family reached out to anyone with a phone that might be able to help them. The people on the other end of the phone had good intentions and wanted to help. Environments where he can learn from his peers. Regular school classrooms (shop and gym for Michael's), working at Boston Pizza, volunteering, the Special Olympics. Opportunities to show off his skills. Michael loves to show off what he is good at from work to his recreation of horseback riding. Proloquo2Go.  Michael is non-verbal the Pro lo to go app on his iPod empowers Michael to express himself more fully with others.  Let go, and let in. Over time Michael’s parents have had to let go, which has allowed Michael to become his own person. The family has also had to allow other people to enter and be a part of Michael’s life. (Without interviewing them first!). At some point, someone else is going to have to be there for Michael other than his parents.   I thank Alice for sharing her family’s story. There are great insights and lessons that we can apply to our own situations. Our mini-series on housing for people with disabilities is continuing so go ahead and Subscribeto the mailing list to get all 6 episodes sent directly to your inbox!    Love & Respect, Eric     Resources:  Proloquo2Go - symbol-supported communication app - Click Here    If you received value from this content please leave me a review on iTunes. By leaving a 5 star review on iTunes you make the Empowering Ability Podcast more discoverable, and more families will benefit. Click Here To Leave a Review on iTunes     The Empowering Ability Podcast is available on iTunes and various other apps so that you can listen while on the go from your smartphone!   Click Here To Listen on iTunes

Hear the story of the Rougemount Housing Co-operative & the Deohaeko Support Network, learn what intentional community is and how to build it, learn the key factors that made Rougemount a success for people with a disability, and get a different perspective on creating a home for people with a disability. This is part 4 of 6 of the mini-series on housing for people with a disability on the Empowering Ability podcast. In this episode, I bring you the story of Rougemount Co-operative Housing, and the Deohaeko Support Network– a co-operative housing project led by families that has embodied diversity, inclusion and community since its inception in the mid 1980’s. I had the pleasure of visiting the community for a guided tour, and I sat down to interview 5 members of the community. I Narrating the story of Rougemount and Deohaeko is Janet Klees. Janet has been involved in the lives of people with disabilities, their families, and allies in community for over 30 years. Until recently, she has been coordinator with the family-governed Deohaeko Support Network for over 20 years. She is the author of three books which are directly rooted in the Deohaeko experience, (We Come Bearing Gifts; Our Presence has Roots; Deohaeko Decades) and which are now sold around the world to present the unique options of this family group.  Currently, Janet is the Executive Director with a family support organization, the Durham Association for Family Respite Services, with hopes of sharing her learning with a wider group of families in Durham Region and trying to affect larger scale supports and changes for families.    The Story of Rougemount and Deohaeko  Paraphrasing from the podcast Janet shares:  “In the middle of crisis, there is always opportunity. In the 1980’s in the Greater Toronto Area there was a housing crisis, much like there is today, and a group of 7 families came together with the goal of creating ordinary life in ordinary neighborhoods for their sons and daughters with a developmental disability.  At the time, the Federal Government of Canada and Provincial Government of Ontario was funding Housing co-operatives where the people don't own the units, but there are permanent tenants as long as they follow the rules of the co-op set by the co-op board. It just so happens that Rougemount was the very last co-operative housing project that was funded by the Canadian Government.  The building was constructed with 105 units, where the 7 sons and daughters with a disability would live in this community. There are approximately 200 residents living at Rougemount and the residents were selected to represent the ethnic, demographic, and socioeconomic makeup of the surrounding region with no more than 10% of population having a disability, which is natural in this region (as it is in most areas).  The founding families of Rougemount then created the Deohaeko Support Network, which is a group of families that think about the natural and paid supports for their 7 sons and daughters in the community.”    Intentional Community  There is a lot of discussion in the disability sector about what community is and the definitions can vary widely. The conversation can range from placing groups of people (such as people with a disability and seniors) together in a building to support each other, to a diverse group of individuals coming together to build relationships and share their gifts with each other.  Amazing community builder, Linda Dawe shares what she has learned about building an intentional community at Rougemount over the last 25 years:  “Intentional community is not something that you measure - it is something that you feel. It isn't a thing, it is in the hearts of people, and people embrace it to different degrees. One of the things that was important in creating the intentional community at Rougemount was the diversity in the residents that represented the actual community.  Not placing groups of people together, such as seniors and people with disabilities. Intentional community at Rougemount started out as a grand thing, but simply it is just being in relationship with each other. People living well together. It requires effort, consciousness, and core people to hold the values of the community.  Janet Klees adds: “Simply put, community is being a good neighbor. At Rougemount people look for opportunities to be good neighbors and then talk about it, and hold up examples of it.  Intentional community isn't a building - it is a mindset! We can take the ideas with us, and many groups have. People have come into Rougemount and have seen how it works, and then brought it into neighborhoods with single family homes, and brought it into condo buildings. Rougemount is just an example of how it can work.  On the podcast, Rougemount residents and supporters Donna Mitchell (25 year resident, Deohaeko member), Tiffany Dawe (25 year resident, Deohaeko member), Shirley Brown (25 year resident), and Sorida Fonseca (Supporter to Tiffany Dawe) share their story of intentional community and community contributions. Through their voices it is evident that everyone is an equal contributor to this community. People with a disability aren’t viewed as a burden, they are valued as equals in the community that provided significant contributions just like everyone else.   Lessons from Deohaeko  5 Essential tips in shaping aspects of the community, invisible support, and making principled decisions that ensure that people are seen as ordinary neighbours sharing much common ground. *As described by Janet Klees on the podcast 1. Diversity. Dedication to supporting, shaping, and holding a very typical community - less than 10% disability. It is the diversity of the co-op that makes it work. Diversity first before building intentional community.  2. Where people lived. The people with disabilities living at Rougemount live in apartments across the building, not segregated on one floor. This allowed people to be known by their individual identity, not just by the identity of their disability. 3. Support identified by their name, and deflected to person and their interests. We helped new support workers be thoughtful on how they introduced themselves. When support introduced themselves they 1) identified themselves by their name only, 2) directed the conversation back to the individual they were supporting, and 3) spoke to that individual’s interest. (Example: “Hi I am Sorida, I'm hanging out with Tiffany today.  We are headed to the art gallery today - have you seen her art? You should come over to her apartment sometime and see her art.”)  4. Discouraged segregated activities. When new committees were starting we had lots of conversation about who would participate. We thought about who from Deohaeko would participate in committees and chose not to have too many people with a disability on one committee because it then becomes difficult for people to build relationships.  5. No shared support. The reason is that the families didn't want people to see the same supporter with different people with disabilities because then people look at people with disabilities as all the same. Rather than saying different people need different kinds of support. Even in a crisis support wasn’t grouped. We figured different layers of support that would come forward in these situation. We really focused on people having their own unique and individual lives.   *All of this is to focus on creating natural relationships, and it works.    Creating Housing Solutions Today Janet has carried the thinking from her work with Deohaeko forward into her work today with Durham Association for Family Respite Services. Janet shares: "Housing is a community issue, not a disability issue. In our most recent housing project, we partnered with Brockville and District Association for Community Involvement on a housing project called, ‘Housing is a Community Issue’. We asked families who were interested in housing to join us in discovering housing solutions together and 35 families showed up. This is incredible because we told the families up front that we don’t have any money to give. It shows how understanding families are that they are going to be part of the solution.  Even in this housing crisis, people are still finding housing. With our project, we are thinking about what are the ways that people are finding to build, buy, rent, and to figure out housing. Then asking, ‘why can't these ways fit families that are looking for housing?’ This is not a Ministry of Community and Social Services (MCSS) issue, it belongs with housing. This is an affordability issue, not a disability issue. If people need renovations it is a cost issue. We need to ally ourselves with all the people that are struggling for housing. There are organizations like Habitat for Humanity, and Options for Homes that we can ally with. If MCSS is involved in housing they build a service, not a home. Families only have to think about their own son or daughter, and think about works best.”   In a recent housing forum in Durham Region, 70 families gathered to discuss person centered housing for their sons and daughters. The group compiled a list of 7 recommendations for the Government of Ontario, and for all of us to think about as we work toward creating a good life for people with disabilities.  1. Home, housing and support are 3 different things and bust thought of separately. 2. Most housing challenges are affordability, not disability. 3. People with disability contribute to their communities, they are not a burden. 4.Getting good housing and support doesn't mean taking away the individual’s control of their life  5.Providing renovation dollars allows families to be creative with their current home today (stabilize current situation), and allows for flexible housing in the future. 6. Stop funding congregated mega projects for people with disabilities, and disabilities / seniors. Commit to typical housing options and neighbourhoods. 7. Where there are Families that are willing to create a home in community the government needs to support with resources. These are cheapest, most effective models, and they are currently the least funded.  There are so many things I am taking away from my time with Janet, Linda, Tiffany, Shirley, Donna, and Sorida and grateful to them for sharing their experiences, and what they have learned.      The Key Takeaways for me are:  1. Building Intentional Community starts with rich diversity and upholding neighbourly values.  2. Fostering Intentional Community requires us to get a common understanding of each other, and through that understanding building trust and respect. From here we can show love to each other in small little ways, and uphold those acts of love.  3. Housing and support are best viewed as separate.  4. Be intentional in creating opportunities for people with disabilities to build relationship. Do not group them in housing or support.  5. As families, we need be a part of the solution. Design our lives, take control, and ask for help. We assume that someone is going to take care of things for us, but that someone is never going to come.   To end, here is a beautiful quote from community builder, Linda Dawe “Everyone needs good housing. Once they have good housing they are able to experience good things in their life.” Our mini-series on housing for people with disabilities is continuing so go ahead and Subscribeto the mailing list to get all 6 episodes sent directly to your inbox! Love & Respect, Eric   Resources:   Purchase These Books to Learn More Lesson's from Deohaeko: "We come bearing gifts" by Janet Klees  "Our Presence has roots" by Janet Klees   Learn more about Deohaeko: Click Here   Learning events In Durham Region: Click Here  Book a study tour to learn about Rougemount and Deohaeko: Click Here Contact Janet Klees: janet@legacies.ca      If you received value from this content please leave me a review on iTunes. By leaving a 5 star review on iTunes you make the Empowering Ability Podcast more discoverable, and more families will benefit. Click Here To Leave a Review on iTunes      The Empowering Ability Podcast is available on iTunes and various other apps so that you can listen while on the go from your smartphone!   Click Here To Listen on iTunes

Founder of online social media platform My Disability Matters, Dale Reardon, comes on the podcast to discuss this new platform for people with disabilities.   Dale, now 47, went blind at the age of 17 from Leber hereditary optic neuropathy, which is an inherited form of vision loss that usually begins in a person's teens or twenties. Dale has had an abundant career as a lawyer, tourist operator, and even worked for the Australia tax office before becoming a technology entrepreneur alongside his wife and creating the My Disability Matters platform.   The My Disability Matters Platform My Disability Matters initially started as a news publishing and republishing platform for blogs of disabled people. The idea came when Dale saw a growing distrust from the disability community in disability news publisher, The Mighty.  Dale says, The Mighty was publishing stories that exploited people’s disability as inspiration, also known as inspiration porn or ableism. Dale and his wife then evolved the news publishing idea into a social media platform for people with disabilities. Paraphrasing from the podcast, “Dale found that discussing disability issues on existing social networks can feel unsafe because of the bullying and trolling that goes on. The My Disability Matters social platform provides a safe, supportive environment where disability issues can be discussed without fear. Living with disability can be lonely and isolating because of barriers such as transportation, and an online platform allows isolated people to form friendships online. Dale shares, when he was losing his eye sight a family with father and son who were blind took him under their wing and helped him to see that he would still be able to live a normal life. Dale hopes to create the space for many of these connections to happen for people with disabilities.” At the date of publishing this blog and podcast, 1,650 people across the world so far are using the My Disability Matters platform. I encourage you to check out the platform at www.mydisabilitymatters.club. Create your free account, and start to build relationships with like-minded people.    Australia’s National Disability Insurance Scheme (NDIS)  On the podcast, Dale provides an overview of Australia’s National Disability Insurance Scheme (NDIS), which is a new way of providing support to people with disabilities in Australia since 2013.   Paraphrasing from the podcast Dale explains, “The NDIS is designed to give money to people who have a severe and profound disability to take care of their needs. Up until 2013, Australia used block funding (the government provided grants to organizations), and the organizations then served as many people as they could. In simple terms with the NDIS, a person with a disability will have a meeting with the government to determine how much help they need, they are then provided with the funding needed to support their disability, and they are free to hire the staff that needed without being bound to a support organization. When the NDIS roll out is complete in 2019, 460,000 people with the most severe disabilities will be covered under the insurance scheme.  On the whole, there is probably about 4 million people in Australia with a disability. There are growing pains, but the hope is that the NDIS will revolutionize disability care in Australia." To learn more about how the NDIS works, how it is helping people with a disability, and the associated growing pains tune into the podcast. Our mini-series on housing for people with disabilities is continuing so go ahead and Subscribeto the mailing list to get all 6 episodes sent directly to your inbox!   Love & Respect, Eric     Resources:  My Disability Matters Social Platform: Create your free account - Click Here! My Disability Matters News: www.mydisabilitymatters.news Contact Dale Reardon: dale@mydisabilitymatters.club   If you received value from this content please leave me a review on iTunes. By leaving a 5 star review on iTunes you make the Empowering Ability Podcast more discoverable, and more families will benefit. Click Here To Leave a Review on iTunes    The Empowering Ability Podcast is available on iTunes and various other apps so that you can listen while on the go from your smartphone!   Click Here To Listen on iTunes  

David Roche calls himself an inspirational humorist, who has a facial difference. The word inspiration can be viewed as a dirty word in the disability world, as many stories are told and consumed as 'inspiration porn' -inspiration calling on the bias of a person's disability. David however, provides authentic inspiration. We are automatically drawn to the difference David wears on his face, and he uses this difference to inspire us to look within ourselves to find our own inner beauty and strength. On the Empowering Ability Podcast David tells us that, every time without fail when he orders his old-fashioned donut, and a double double coffee from Tim Hortons the server brings him back a cup of tea and no donut. When meeting someone for the first time they are completely absorbed in the visual. So absorbed that they don’t ever hear him.   When David speaks to audiences and meets people for the first time he encourages them to ask about his facial difference. He has found it as a useful strategy for him to get it out of the way. David was born with part of his mandible (lower jaw) missing, and visible swollen veins on the side of his face. By calling out his difference it allows him to clear out the space for himself, and allows him to be vulnerable and authentic.    Paraphrasing from the podcast David shares, “I have learned that everyone feels disfigured to some degree. Everyone caries a fear inside them that something is wrong with ourselves. In our western culture, everything is linked to our appearance, and women have to carry that more than men do. We all carry a little spot inside of us where fear and doubt resides - if we don’t deal with that then we are prey for the predators. I have learned how to deal with that feeling inside myself. I have learned some life lessons that you need to know, because if you don’t deal with that fear that is when the predators get you.” For David, his face is his gift. He's had to find his beauty inside, and he feels that it is his purpose to help other people find their inner beauty. David offers this advice to find your inner beauty: “When you look in the mirror that is not you, that is how other people see you. So when you look in the mirror do this: don’t go looking for all your little flaws, and all the things that are wrong with you. Look in your eyes and love yourself, and smile and say good morning, and say how wonderful you are. If you look in the mirror and think that is you, you’re wrong. Because the real you is, as Jean Vanier says, love and community. The real you comes out with other people, and it comes out in the form of love. You have to find your inner George Clooney. So when you look in the mirror every morning lower your voice and say, ’Hey looking good this morning!’” David and his wife do a program called, ‘Love At Second Sight’ about appearance and acceptance and you can watch their short film at loveatsecondsight.org. Also, if you are interested in learning more about David and his story pick up his book, ‘The Church of 80% Sincerity’. David leaves us with his favorite quote from Jean Vanier to reflect on: "There is a revolution going on. We are beginning to realize that everyone, every human being is important. We are beginning to see that every human being is beautiful. At the heart of this revolution are not the powerful, the wealthy or intelligent. It is people with disabilities who are showing us what is important - love, community and the freedom to be ourselves."                                                    -Jean Vanier  Our mini-series on housing for people with disabilities is continuing so go ahead and Subscribeto the mailing list to get all 6 episodes sent directly to your inbox!   Love & Respect, Eric     Resources: Website: http://www.davidroche.com/ Contact David Roche: Click Here David's Book: Click Here David's Film: loveatsecondsight.org    If you received value from this content please leave me a review on iTunes. By leaving a 5 star review on iTunes you make the Empowering Ability Podcast more discoverable, and more families will benefit. Click Here To Leave a Review on iTunes    The Empowering Ability Podcast is available on iTunes and various other apps so that you can listen while on the go from your smartphone! Click Here To Listen on iTunes  

The Anthony Bourdain of the community care world, Jackie Goldstein, is our guest this week. Jackie is an observer, educator, author and speaker on community care support models. Jackie's book, 'Voices of Hope For Mental Illness; Not Against, With', shares the stories of many community care models across the United States, and the story of Geel Belgium. On this podcast, we discuss the story of Geel Belgium, Broadway Community Housing (BCH), and Gould Farm.    Geel Belgium The story of the Geel Belgium's foster family community care model started as far back as the 13th century, and it still continues today! This makes Geel one of the oldest and largest community care models in the world. The foster family system evolved in Geel from the legend of St. Dymphna; the St. of loss causes. You can hear Jackie tell the fascinating legend of St. Dymphna on the podcast.    Paraphrasing from the podcast Jackie explains, "In the Middle ages, the Church is where people went to be healed. Word spread that there was a St. in Belgium that could heal people, and people started coming into Geel to be healed. Pilgrims started with 9 days of praying, and sometimes this worked because of a placebo effect. If praying didn't cure their illness, the church asked the towns people to take these pilgrims into their homes. Geel was an agricultural community so there was a deal made between the town and the pilgrims that they would work on the farm, and in exchange live in the home. This became the model, and the community thought of themselves of a healing community. It was a source of pride, there was no stigma. If a Geel resident didn't have a boarder, people wondered why - where you not good enough? It is not the way we think of a system starting today, this system evolved. However, the foster family system in Geel teaches us that by understanding the needs of the individual, and the resources of the community we can find solutions."   Broadway Housing Communities Ellen Baxter was an observer of the Geel foster family model and saw the need of individuals in New York so she raised funds, and started Broadway Housing Communities (BHC). Her first housing initiative opened in 1986 for 55 homeless single adults. Shortly after in 1990 BHC opened an apartment for homeless families and adults (many of which had a mental illness). Jackie explains " At the time this was against societal norms, people thought that kids shouldn't be exposed to people with mental illness. However, the model proved to be effective. This model also fostered the creation of community by offering everything that was available in the building to the neighbourhood. In a more recent project, BHC has focused on poverty because homelessness had become more of a problem. Residents were selected into the building on a lottery system - some based on poverty, and some based on mental illness."   Gould Farm Beginning in the early 1900's Mr. Gould opened his working farm to people in need, starting with people that were recovering from surgery and evolving into accepting people with disabilities. Jackie had the opportunity to stay at Gould Farm and she shares " Gould Farm is a self sustaining farm, now primarily hosting guests with an intellectual disability. Everyone who works at Gould Farm lives at Gould Farm. This includes the staff and their families, even their kids. It is hard to tell who is a guest and who is staff. It is a community."    What Jackie Has Learned Jackie shares that the subtitle of her book, 'Not against, with', comes from the Robert Frost quote, "Always fall in with what you are asked to accept, take what is given, and make it over your way. My aim in life is always been to hold my own with whatever is going. Not against, with."  What Jackie has learned through her observations of many communities is that you can take any community and you can assume that there is a group of people that need support. You can then ask two questions: What kind of support do they need? (The individual, not a group of people) What resources are available in the community? Then you take the 'Not against, with' approach to find the best solution for the individual by working with individual's abilities, and not ignoring their disability. I thank Jackie for coming onto the podcast and sharing her observations and insights on community care, and creating a home for people with a mental illness and disability. If you are interested in learning more about community care models I recommend that you pick up Jackie's book, she would also be happy to speak to your event.  Our mini-series on housing for people with disabilities is continuing so go ahead and Subscribe to the mailing list to get all 6 episodes sent directly to your inbox!   Love & Respect, Eric      Resources:   Email Jackie: jlgoldst@samford.edu    Jackie's Book, 'Voices of Hope for Mental Illness: Not Against, With'     If you received value from this content please leave me a review on iTunes. By leaving a 5 star review on iTunes you make the Empowering Ability Podcast more discoverable, and more families will benefit. Click Here To Leave a Review on iTunes     The Empowering Ability Podcast is available on iTunes and various other apps so that you can listen while on the go from your smartphone!   Click Here To Listen on iTunes

Al Etmanski and I talk about how to bring social change to life by thinking and acting like a movement, the Registered Disability Savings Plan (RDSP), basic income for people with a disability, and the current state of the family and individual arms of the disability movement.  Think and Act Like a Movement Al is the author of the book, ‘Impact: Six Patters to Spread Your Social Innovation’, and Al and I discuss the first pattern; think and act like a movement.    Paraphrasing from the podcast, Al tells us:  “It isn't about creating your own movement - we are all already part of many movements…. the question is which ones do we want to bring our energy and resources to. Thinking an acting like a movement is important because big ideas only come into reality when others feel that they have something in common. Movements create a popular support, and the cultural receptivity that emboldens politicians (enables the politician to make bold decisions). Most of the time politicians will ignore your proposals unless they pick up that there is a large degree of receptivity in the public. This is what makes movements more powerful than organizations. Movements don't happen overnight, they take time and become long term trends.”   An example of thinking an acting like a movement is how PLAN BC, an organization Al Co-Founded, led the charge to bring the RDSP to life. The RDSP is a savings plan for Canadians with a disability - enabling people with a disability to save for the future in a way that does not impact eligibility for government supported programs. The idea started at PLAN, but they realized they wouldn't be able to lobby for this change on their own; they had to bring in other people. In order to address the broader initiative, they created alliances with organizations, families, strangers and adversaries and tried to get as many people moving in the same direction to achieve the ultimate end outcome – financial security for people with a disability in Canada.     How do we think and act like a movement?   Al Suggests:  ​1) We need to calculate the movements you are already part of. 2) Identify the players that your movement touches on. 3) Of those players, identify those that are aligned with your values, and that you would want to work with. 4) Then determine how can you contribute, or how can your organization contribute. If we start with 1 or 2 % of our time and resources you can make a difference.   I got a ton of value from Al’s book ‘Impact: Six Patters to Spread Your Social Innovation’. I highly recommend you get yourself a copy if you are looking for a guidebook to bringing your social innovation to life.     The RDSP  I haven’t yet covered the RDSP on the podcast, so Al provides a high-level overview of  how the RDSP works, and the benefits it provides. To sign up for an RDSP you must be eligible for the Disability Tax Credit (DTC). If you are eligible, or think you might be eligible for the DTC I highly recommend that you consider opening an RDSP to support securing your, or your loved one’s financial future. I will be covering the RDSP in greater detail in a future episode – so for now you can learn more by listening to this podcast with Al Etmanski, or by reading more from the government’s website.      The Family and Individual Arms of the Disability Movement  I ask Al to give his perspective on the current state of the disability movement, and he suggested that there many arms of the disability movement and to simplify it for our conversation we discuss the family and the individual arms of the disability movement.     Current State of The Family Arm  Paraphrasing from the podcast, Al tells us:  “The family arm isn't as strong as it used to be - I don't see the representation from younger family members that there used to be there 20 years ago. (Al hypothesizes that) this could be because the existing players aren't reaching out, or the agenda is not relevant to younger families. The medium of expression has changed dramatically and it has me wondering where the current limitations of the family arm are currently related to our adaptation into the social media world.”    Current State of Individual Arm  Paraphrasing from the podcast, Al tells us:  “There is a huge shift with how people with disabilities see themselves, and see themselves in the world. Al coins this as an ‘evolution of consciousness’. I come from and era where we were asking people to forget about their disability, and to push it in the background. We were asking society not to notice the disability. I am seeing an evolution of consciousness that seems to be comparable to the rising of women in the woman’s rights movement, and minorities in the civil rights movement. People (with disabilities) are taking back the language and beginning to describe their situations the way they are experiencing them. I've begun to see this everywhere, and I think this is so significant. I think it demands that we think about what role we have as advocates, supporters, and family members to make sure that we don't get in the way.”   On the podcast, Al shares the moment he realized this evolution of consciousness in a story as a father with his daughter Liz. Liz acknowledged her disability during a spoken word performance in front of an audience and Al states, " It was both the real deal, and it was no big deal." The full story is available on the podcast.   There are also many groups of people that have emerged across Canada that are interpreters of this evolution, such as the organization Exeko.  Exeko provides ‘intellectual mediation’ with the assumption of intellectual competence, and their job is to make sure others understand what people with a disability are saying, untampered.     Basic Income  Al is currently working on the basic income movement to provide a guaranteed basic income for people with a disability in British Columbia, Canada. As a comparison, think guaranteed income for seniors (ex. Canada Pension Plan). The idea is to end the current welfare framework that has restrictions and penalizes people, and to provide a guaranteed basic monthly income with no restrictions, or requirements for reporting. Any additional income would be additive and be taxed accordingly, but would not disqualify you from receiving the basic income. If you are interested in learning more, or contributing to this movement you can check out The Canadian Basic Income Network.    My sincere gratitude goes out to Al for sharing his insights with us, and for the work he has done and is doing to make the world a better place. Thank you, Al!  I couldn’t cover all the content from the podcast in this blog – there was just so much rich content! I consider this podcast a ‘must listen to’ for the opportunity learn from one of the most insightful and influential people in the social innovation and disability space. Also on the podcast, Al gives us a sneak peek inside the current book he is working on. Listen to the podcast to find out more!   Our mini-series on housing for people with disabilities is continuing so go ahead and Subscribeto the mailing list to get all 6 episodes sent directly to your inbox!    Love & Respect, Eric      Resources: Website: aletmanski.com   Al Etmanski's Blog: http://aletmanski.com/blog/ (Writes about issues for people who want to make the world a better place.)   Article: 'The 'C' In Canada Stands for Caring' Vickie Cammack Click Here   Al’s book ‘Impact: Six Patters to Spread Your Social Innovation’     Al's Blog referencing King Arthur’s Night (‘Evolution of Conciousness’) http://aletmanski.com/impact/artists-arent-ahead-of-their-time/       If you received value from this content please leave me a review on iTunes. By leaving a 5 star review on iTunes you make the Empowering Ability Podcast more discoverable, and more families will benefit. Click Here To Leave a Review on iTunes       The Empowering Ability Podcast is available on iTunes and various other apps so that you can listen while on the go from your smartphone!   Click Here To Listen on iTunes  

I ask Keenan, “What is the most common question you get asked in your role as Co-leader at LiveWorkPlay?”. Keenan replies “Housing – what should we do in housing?” - At the end of the podcast recording in Episode 1; “The movement to individualized support, and accessing developmental support services”,  In this week’s podcast I share unreleased audio from our very first guest on the podcast, Keenan Wellar. Keenan is the innovative Co-founder and Co-leader of LiveWorkPlay, a developmental service agency that works to facilitate community connections and relationships in Ottawa, ON. When answering this question, Keenan takes a coach approach by asking a lot of questions in order to draw out the best answer for that family. A couple of questions that Keenan will ask are;  Where do most citizens tend to live in your community?  (Let’s start there)  What are the barriers to those outcomes (living in 'ordinary' housing) ?   These are great questions to get you thinking about the best solution for you and your family. To help guide your thinking process I’ve created a FREE workbook to help you create your vision of the best housing solution for you, and to take the first steps toward implementing your solution. Click Here to download the free workbook.   Keenan shares, "If we just look at the systemic one size fits all housing solution then we are closing a lot of doors." I agree. We also might not be creating an environment for a person with a disability to flourish by taking a one size fits all approach. Keenan also touches on the problem of isolation and loneliness for people with a disability, and how important it is to work on developing unpaid relationships. Keenan and I dive deep into building social capital topic with Al Condeluci in Episode 6; “Social Capital; Building Relationships for Improved Well-Being” Take a listen to this podcast to get a different perspective on creating the best home for you and your loved one. Our mini-series on housing for people with disabilities is continuing so go ahead and Subscribeto the mailing list to get all 6 episodes sent directly to your inbox!    Love & Respect, Eric   How to Contact Keenan Wellar and LiveWorkPlay: Website: http://liveworkplay.ca/ Phone: 613-702-0332   If you received value from this content please leave me a review on iTunes. By leaving a 5 star review on iTunes you make the Empowering Ability Podcast more discoverable, and more families will benefit. Click Here To Leave a Review on iTunes    The Empowering Ability Podcast is available on iTunes and various other apps so that you can listen while on the go from your smartphone! Click Here To Listen on iTunes    

Guest Ron Pruessen, father to Caroline, who has a developmental disability, member of Opportunities Mississauga, and Chair of the Ontario Developmental Services Housing Task Force. In this episode, Ron has an open conversation with me as a father and gives his personal perspective on housing for people with a developmental disability, rather than speaking for organizations and projects he is involved with. This is Part 2 of a 6 part mini-series on housing for people with disabilities. We are exploring the housing issue for people with disabilities, new innovative ideas, and success stories from around the globe. Subscribe to the mailing list to get all 6 episodes sent directly to your inbox! Ron has been advocating for people with disabilities for the last 20 years. He was moved to do something when he, and his wife Alice, found that there weren’t many opportunities for their daughter Caroline, now 40, when she graduated high school. Ron got involved in a family group called Opportunities Mississauga, which now represents about 200 families. Currently, Ron sits at the Partnership Table with the Ontario Provincial Government to voice what is needed in terms of support for people (and families) with a developmental disability. This led to the creation of the Ontario Developmental Services Housing Task Force (Housing Task Force), in 2015, to begin addressing the housing crisis for people with a developmental disability in Ontario. Ron currently serves as the Chair for the Housing Task Force.   As explained in Part 1 of the mini-series on housing, ‘Creating a Home, with Marg McLean’ (Listen Here) – there are 12,000 to 17,000 people in Ontario waiting for housing and the list is growing. I recommend you check out Part 1 as Marg and I explore the elements of creating a home, and I provide a Free Workbook to help guide you through creating your vision.   The Housing Task Force The Housing Task Force was created by the Ontario Provincial Government, but it is not operated by the government. It is operated at arm’s length by individuals that need support, families, and members support agencies. It was evident that in the past the government wasn't looking outside the box, so the focus has been placed on finding creative solutions. The Housing Task Force was given $3MM in annualized funding, which has funded 18 pilot projects from the 200 proposals submitted. The Housing Task Force is now working closely with the people in the pilot projects to learn what is working, and what isn’t. Personally, I love that the Ontario Government took an entrepreneurial approach to the problem, and allowed the Housing Task Force to test different ideas. The next challenge will be to fund and scale the housing models that have been proven to be effective in providing people a good life. Ron shares that in his opinion it is the Government’s responsibility to provide housing and a good life for people with disabilities, just like they do for senior citizens. The Ontario Government didn’t do anything for a long time, but the current government deserves credit for the approach it is taking. However, Ron says there is much more work to be done.  I ask Ron, as a father and someone that is involved with a family group and the housing task force what have you learned along the journey on housing? Ron shares that for a long time the government has had a limited menu (of housing options). There has been a lot of wonderful ideas at the grassroots level that haven't had the opportunity to come to life. Individuals have been doing the visioning, and they see the possibilities out there. The most significant example of creativity Ron has seen in is building partnerships. The community can provide the best solutions. Not just because you can mobilize financial resources, but also because you can develop a wealth of opportunities (educational, social, employment), and this is incredibly important. The house (or home) is an important part of the picture, but it isn't the whole solution. Community connections improve quality of life, but the government can't do this, we have to do this.   Examples of partnering with community: 1) Mobilizing resources to launch a project with local governments; cities, towns, and municipalities. (Ex. affordable housing programs and agendas.) 2) Organizations like Habitat for Humanity and building developers contributing resources. 3) Community colleges participating in programs that where there are opportunities to develop friendships.     I ask Ron, knowing what you know now - what are the first steps you would take to put a housing solution in place? Ron replied, we want to turn to the government but, that isn't a very effective because the government has a lot of demands on it (education, infrastructure, etc.), and there isn't enough money.  Don't just wait and sit around, be proactive, and start community conversations.  What we should have done is build the community connections and relationships that have been effective; local government, social clubs, churches, local agencies, organizations. This is where we started a long time ago, and this is where we are going back to.    I ask Ron, when should you start designing a life with your son or daughter with a disability? Ron suggested parents should start having these family conversations in the early teenage years. At this age you start to learn who this person is, what they want to contribute, and what their gifts are. When it comes to housing, it is a long process. Caroline (Ron’s daughter) went on the residential housing support waitlist when she was 16, and they thought it would take about 10 years for her to find a home. 22 years later Caroline was still waiting for an opportunity to emerge.  The simple message is: the earlier, the better.  Tune into the podcast to hear more from Ron about building community, outside of the box thinking, building a whole life, and building relationships. Ron strongly urges us to keep the pressure on the Government, keep pushing. Talk to your member of parliament, and make it clear that this is a problem. Help these people empathize with your lived experience, because they haven't lived the life. They need to hear our stories.  I thank Ron for coming on the podcast to share his experience and perspective on housing for people with a disability.  I’ve created a FREE workbook to help you create your vision of the best housing solution for you, and to take the first steps toward implementing your solution. Click Here to download the free workbook.   Love & Respect, Eric      How to Contact Ron Pruessen: Facebook Page: Click Here   Podcast Resources: P4P Booklet on Housing Task Force Projects: Click Here    If you received value from this content please leave me a review on iTunes. By leaving a 5 star review on iTunes you make the Empowering Ability Podcast more discoverable, and more families will benefit. Click Here To Leave a Review on iTunes    The Empowering Ability Podcast is available on iTunes and various other apps so that you can listen while on the go from your smartphone!   Click Here To Listen on iTunes    

This week’s guest on the Empowering Ability Podcast is Win Kelly Charles. Win was Born with Cerebral Palsy (CP), and has defied the odds by becoming an author, the host of the Butterflies of Wisdom podcast, a competitor in the Kona IronMan Triathlon, CEO of her own jewelry design company, and motivational speaker. Win Charles truly is an inspiration to many. Win is a disability advocate, and openly shares her journey as a person with CP. On the podcast, Win tells us that CP occurs at birth, and isn't genetic (so it isn’t something you will pass on). For Win CP impacts both sides of body; her left hand is weak, and her right leg is weak, and she has undergone 100+ surgeries.  Win is an extremely resilient person, so I ask her; what is the mindset that you carry to be the person that you are?  Win shares that she is “..not named Win for nothing.” Win’s mother named her after her grandmother, who’s name was Winaphin. From the tone in Win’s voice when sharing this story, I could hear the sense of pride and motivation this gives her.  Second, Win was treated like she didn’t have a disability by her parents. Win’s parents put her in the regular classroom, where she was treated as an equal and was able to participate in the same programming as everyone else. From her experience, Win suggests that if possible parents should put their kids in regular classrooms.  The approach that Win takes in her life is to "…….Always, Always, Always, look outside the box.... The solution is never cookie cutter." Win brings out a great point here as many families and people with a disability are constantly facing road blocks, and have to look for different solutions. Look outside the box, as win suggests, don’t take no or the status quo for an answer, be creative and find a different path, find your path!    I ask Win who her mentors were in her life that have made a big impact on her? Win shares that there were a couple of educators who she views as mentors, but the biggest mentors in her life were her Parents. Win again drives home the point that her parents raising her as if she didn't have a disability empowered her to become the woman that she is today.  Take a listen to the podcast to hear our discussion on inclusion, how Win became an author and a podcaster, as well as the messages Win shares on disability advocacy. If you want to learn more about Win’s journey, I recommend you pick up her book ‘I Win; Hope and life as a disabled woman living in a not disabled world’ on Amazon. Win tours the country, speaking to schools and institutions to raise awareness about cerebral palsy, and living a full life no matter what holds you back.  It was a pleasure having Win on the podcast, and if you want to hear more from Win you can Sign up for Win’s newsletter to stay updated on new releases and appearances.   Love & Respect, Eric     How to Contact Win Kelly Charles: Twitter: @WinKellyCharles Win's Art: Click Here Podcast: Butterflies of Wisdom       If you received value from this content please leave me a review on iTunes. By leaving a 5 star review on iTunes you make the Empowering Ability Podcast more discoverable, and more families will benefit. Click Here To Leave a Review on iTunes       The Empowering Ability Podcast is available on iTunes and various other apps so that you can listen while on the go from your smartphone!  Click Here To Listen on iTunes

Mitch, a high school senior, started to explore part-time employment in his community and was continually turned away, due to what Mitch thinks was his disability. Mitch and his mom, Charity, then teamed up to make Mitch's dream a reality and created 'Mitch and Mama's Coffee Bar'.  This week's guests on the Empowering Ability Podcast are mother and son, Charity Hilson and Mitch Dale, who tell their story of making Mitch's dream of owning a coffee shop come to life. Danny Steeves Eby, fellow entrepreneur from Episode 8 of the podcast joins us as a co-host on this episode. Subscribe to the Empowering Ability mailing list to get more great stories like this one sent directly to your inbox! Mitch and Charity were pushed by their friends and family to start, and with a small amount of capital they opened up a coffee bar inside an existing operating store in their hometown of Listowel, ON. The coffee bar currently employs Mitch and Charity, and provides volunteer opportunities to people in the community who have a disability. They have a grand vision of having their own store, with couches and tables, but the most important thing was for the mother and son team was to get started, so they downsized their dream (for now). Mitch shares that having a coffee shop is his dream because he is a people person, and he loves to be around people. Every cup of coffee comes with a free hug from Mitch, and he thinks it keeps many customers coming back. I was lucky enough to get 3 hugs from Mitch, and for me the hugs were worth much more than the price of a cup of coffee.  Mitch and Charity share that most people in their community have embraced their new venture, and are even offering to help find funding. Charity provides advice to other families looking to start their own venture, "Really listen to what your child is wanting, it is easy to take over their dream..... (and) think about the best business to start that utilizes their gifts. Start slow, don't get discouraged, don't give up, use your resources. It is very hard to ask for help, but people really want to help you. If you just ask for help things run a lot smoother." Charity also shares, "I'd like families to know if I can do it, anyone can.... I am a single mother with 3 kids and 2 jobs."  This is a great story of creating an incredible ordinary life for Mitch, Charity, and other people with a disability. Mitch and Mama's is also helping to change societal perceptions for people with a disability, by providing the opportunity to show their gifts through employment in the community. Stop by Mitch and Mama's to get a coffee, and a hug from Mitch - you will understand what I mean.  There are a lot of ideas in the grave yard. Bringing an idea to life and creating something takes a lot of courage. Just take the first step, start! Then enjoy the journey. I'd like to thank Mitch and Charity for coming on the podcast to share their story, and lessons learned from starting their own venture. It was a pleasure interviewing them and I am excited for my next trip back to Mitch and Mamas. I'd also like to thank my co-host for this episode, Danny Steeves Eby, for his positivity, contagious laugh, and insightful questions.    Love & Respect, Eric      How to Contact Mitch & Mama's: Email: mitchandmamas@gmail.com Phone: 519-291-7235 Website: http://www.mitchandmamascoffeebar.com/ Facebook: Click Here   If you received value from this content please leave me a review on iTunes. By leaving a 5 star review on iTunes you make the Empowering Ability Podcast more discoverable, and more families will benefit. Click Here To Leave a Review on iTunes   The Empowering Ability Podcast is available on iTunes and various other apps so that you can listen while on the go from your smartphone!   Click Here To Listen on iTunes

Butterflies of Wisdom is a podcast where we want to share your story. We want to share your knowledge if you have a small business if you are an author or a Doctor, or whatever you are. With a disability or not, we want to share your story to inspire others. To learn more about Butterflies of Wisdom visit http://butterfliesofwisdom.weebly.com/ Be sure to FOLLOW this program https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/wins-women-of-wisdom/id1060801905. To find out more about Challenge Aspen go to https://challengeaspen.org. To learn how Win walk and about Ekso go to http://www.bridgingbionics.org/, or email Amanda Boxtel at amanda@bridgingbionics.org.   On Butterflies of Wisdom today, Best-Selling Author, Win C welcomes Eric Goll. Eric is a disability advocate, certified coach, and the host of the Empowering Ability Podcast. Eric has been greatly influenced by his sister Sarah, who has a developmental disability. Sarah has been his greatest teacher in life; showing him how to love, be kind, be patient, and how to listen. Eric and Sarah had a 'normal' childhood. They went to public school, played with their friends, and did extra circular activities. They had a typical sibling relationship; they laughed, they cried, and they fought. Eric noticed things were different when he was about eight years old when he was pushing Sarah's stroller in the mall, Sarah was ten at the time. As he pushed Sarah, he started to notice people were staring, especially other kids. As the other kids stared, he stared back, and on occasion, he stuck out my tongue at them. Why were they staring? This was the point he realized that his family was different, other families didn't have big kids in strollers, and he was there to stand up for Sarah. He is still standing for Sarah, but now he stands for families and people with a disability. Eric supports the disability movement by showing individuals with a disability and their tribe (family and loved ones) that they have power, and they have a capability, that they can live an incredible ordinary life, and that they can change the world. Eric hosts the Empowering Ability Podcast where he talks with his guests about creating amazing ordinary lives for people with a disability. Subscribe to the podcast and blog by clicking here (insert link) or just subscribe to the podcast on iTunes (insert link). Eric is also a certified coach who helps families with a disability design and create the life they desire. Eric has experience working with the family as a whole, and members of the family individually depending on the family’s needs. To learn more about Eric visit http://www.empoweringability.org/. To learn more about Win Kelly Charles visit https://wincharles.wix.com/win-charles. To follow Win on Twitter go to @winkellycharles. To follow Win on Instagram go to winkcharles. To follow Win on Snapchat go to Wcharles422. "Books for Books," you buy Win's books so she can purchase books for school. "Getting through school is a 'win' for her fans and a 'win' for her."Please send feedback to Win by email her at winwwow@gmail.com, or go tohttp://survey.libsyn.com/winwisdom and http://survey.libsyn.com/thebutterfly. To be on the show please fill out the intake at http://bit.ly/bow2017. Butterflies of Wisdom sponsored by Kittr a new social media tool that is bringing about new ways of posting on Twitter. It's fun, full of free content you can use, helps you schedule at the best times, is easy to use, and it will help you get more followers. Visit Kittr at gokittr.com. This is a 20% off code forwww.gracedbygrit.com. The code will be XOBUTTERFLIES. If you would like to support Butterflies of Wisdom go to https://www.patreon.com/wcharles. If you want to check out what Win’s friend, Dannidoll, is doing (a.k.a. Dannielle) go to https://www.facebook.com/dannidolltheragdollclown/?notif_t=page_invite_accepted¬if_id=1492366163404241. To learn more about Danielle visit http://www.dancanshred.com. To learn about the magic of Siri go to https://www.udemy.com/writing-a-book-using-siri/?utm_campaign=email&utm_source=sendgrid.com&utm_medium=email. If you want to donate Butterflies of Wisdom, please send a PayPal donation to aspenrosearts@gmail.com oraspenwin@gmail.com. Please donate to Challenge Aspen or the Bridging Bionics Foundation. Please send a check in the mail so 100% goes to Bridging Bionics Foundation.    In the Memo section have people write: In honor of Win Charles. Please donate to the charity of your choice thank you in advance, Win.   Send to:   Challenge Aspen PO Box 6639 Snowmass Village, CO 81615 Or donate online at https://challengeaspen.org.   Bridging Bionics Foundation  PO Box 3767 Basalt, CO 81621   Thank you Win   also  Danielle Coulter Owner of Dan Can Shred Author of If Dan Can Shed, You Can Too: Dream it; Live it!, and The Adventures Zoe Book Series http://www.dancanshred.com Don't forget to leave reviews on Amazon for my books.    

  This is Part 1 of a 6 part mini-series on housing for people with disabilities. We are exploring the housing issue for people with disabilities, new innovative ideas, and success stories from around the globe. Subscribe to the mailing list to get all 6 episodes sent directly to your inbox!   This week's guest on the Empowering Ability Podcast is Marg McLean, Executive Director of Community Living St. Marys. Marg and the Community Living St. Marys team have been helping people with a disability create their home, and support solutions since the 1980's when people were leaving institutions.    The Problem:  As of 2016, the Ontario Ministry of Community and Social Services was supporting approximately 18,000 people with a developmental disability in group homes and other supported living, and an additional 9,700 people were on a waiting list for residential supports. So, the reported demand for residential housing support is over 50% greater than the supply. The demand is likely higher than reported because it obviously doesn’t include people who have not registered for the list. We will be exploring this problem in other parts of the world as the housing mini-series continues.  Reference: (The Toronto Star, 2016)   This is a massive line to wait in as supply of residential homes is increasing at a much slower pace than the demand for people with a developmental disability in need of housing.   So, should families be planning their own housing solution? Marg shares that people are going on the waitlist without thinking, talking, and planning what an ideal home looks like for them. (Note: This is exactly what my family did at the start of our housing search for my sister.) What works well is for families to come up with a vision of what would be a good home in community.    When thinking about your home, there are 4 questions you need to answer:  I’ve created a FREE workbook to help you create your vision of the best housing solution for you and to take the first steps toward implementing this solution. Click Here to download the free workbook.   Marg shares the stories of Michael, Bill, Gord, and Kayleigh on the podcast. Below is a short overview of the home they have created, listen to the podcast and watch the Community Living St. Marys videos to hear their full stories.   Success Stories of Creating Home:  Michael’s story – In his mid 20’s Michael lived in a rural area with his family, and was looking for opportunity to move out of his family home. Michael’s family bought a duplex in a small city, where Michael attended school and has access to transportation. Michael and his housemate live in the upper level and his supportive neighbours, Leah and her mom, live in the main level unit. The duplex is paying the mortgage, and when the mortgage is paid off it will enhance his Registered Disability Savings Plan (RDSP).   Note: Housing trusts can be explored if you are considering home ownership.   Bill’s story – Bill had a supportive housemate living with him, and when his supportive housemate purchased their own home Bill moved with them. Sharing a home with an individual or a family is commonplace, but can be forgotten when considering housing options.   Gord’s story – Gord wasn’t interested in a staff model so he found a couple that live on a farm to live with, and they welcomed him in with open arms. This couple and Gord have shared their lives together for the last 19 years.   Kayleigh’s story – Kayleigh moved out of her mom’s home and into her own apartment in an 8-plex building as part of Community Living St. Marys’ ‘Supportive Neighbour’ project with The Ontario Developmental Services Housing Taskforce . A young family lives beside Kayleigh and provides some supports. Kayleigh also ended up inviting Yvonne to live with her as a roommate.   * Note: The Ontario Developmental Services Housing Taskforce operates at arm’s length from the Ontario government who provided $3MM to fund new innovative housing projects over a 2-year period. In year 1, 12 projects were funded by the Housing Taskforce.   Eric’s Story – I live with a roommate in his own home, and he has outside support come to the house. We are roommates who provide each other friendship and I help with things like lunch, letting his dog out, and being there overnight.   Check out the podcast to hear some creative ways you can find people to share home with, and to hear the Lesson’s Marg has learned helping people with disabilities to create their home.   A key takeaway for me from the conversation with Marg, and the research that I have done on housing is that families need to start thinking and acting on their own vision for housing. What does the ideal home look like? What does the ideal community look like? Take control of your own future. Click Here to download the free housing workbook to get started on your solution.   I thank Marg for coming on the podcast and sharing her experience and stories on housing for people with a disability.   Love & Respect, Eric Goll   How to Contact Marg McLean: Email: mmclean@clstmarys.ca Phone: 519-284-1400 Ext 225 Website: http://communitylivingstmarys.ca/     Podcast Resources: Community Living St. Marys Housing Booklet: Click Here Community Living St. Marys Housing Video: Click Here

A sibling care-giver tells her story of becoming her brother's go to person after her parents passed sooner than anyone expected. This podcast is important for all parents and siblings to listen to. - Hear Helen’s story as a sibling 'care-giver' - Learn why it is important for siblings to be a part of family planning - Learn how siblings can empower their families with conversation and tools - Learn how Helen is changing Ontario policy, and how you can support.   How to contact Helen Ries: Website: helenries.ca Website: gifts-assets.ca Contact Helen: helen.ries@gmail.com Location: Ottawa, Ontario, Canada       Resources: Ontario Independent Facilitation Network OIFN.ca Planned Lifetime Advocacy Network (PLAN) Click Here  P4P Click Here A Manifesto for The Family Arm of the Disability Movement" by Helen Ries Click Here Ontario Leaves Many Persons with Disability Trapped in Poverty by Helen Ries Click Here   Facebook Groups for Siblings  Canada - Click Here USA - Click Here   Love & Respect, Eric     If you received value from this content please leave me a review on iTunes. By leaving a 5 star review on iTunes you make the Empowering Ability Podcast more discoverable, and more families will benefit. Click Here To Leave a Review on iTunes